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AN OLD ACQUAINTANCE +XXII. FAUNTLEROY +XXIII. A VILLAGE HALL +XXIV. THE MASQUERADERS +XXV. THE THREE TOGETHER +XXVI. ZENOBIA AND COVERDALE +XXVII. MIDNIGHT +XXVIII. BLITHEDALE PASTURE +XXIX. MILES COVERDALE'S CONFESSION + + + + +The Blithedale Romance + +by Nathaniel Hawthorne + + + +I. OLD MOODIE + +The evening before my departure for Blithedale, I was returning to my +bachelor apartments, after attending the wonderful exhibition of the +Veiled Lady, when an elderly man of rather shabby appearance met me +in an obscure part of the street. + +"Mr. Coverdale," said he softly, "can I speak with you a moment?" + +As I have casually alluded to the Veiled Lady, it may not be amiss to +mention, for the benefit of such of my readers as are unacquainted +with her now forgotten celebrity, that she was a phenomenon in the +mesmeric line; one of the earliest that had indicated the birth of a +new science, or the revival of an old humbug. Since those times her +sisterhood have grown too numerous to attract much individual notice; +nor, in fact, has any one of them come before the public under such +skilfully contrived circumstances of stage effect as those which at +once mystified and illuminated the remarkable performances of the +lady in question. Nowadays, in the management of his "subject," +"clairvoyant," or "medium," the exhibitor affects the simplicity and +openness of scientific experiment; and even if he profess to tread a +step or two across the boundaries of the spiritual world, yet carries +with him the laws of our actual life and extends them over his +preternatural conquests. Twelve or fifteen years ago, on the +contrary, all the arts of mysterious arrangement, of picturesque +disposition, and artistically contrasted light and shade, were made +available, in order to set the apparent miracle in the strongest +attitude of opposition to ordinary facts. In the case of the Veiled +Lady, moreover, the interest of the spectator was further wrought up +by the enigma of her identity, and an absurd rumor (probably set +afloat by the exhibitor, and at one time very prevalent) that a +beautiful young lady, of family and fortune, was enshrouded within +the misty drapery of the veil. It was white, with somewhat of a +subdued silver sheen, like the sunny side of a cloud; and, falling +over the wearer from head to foot, was supposed to insulate her from +the material world, from time and space, and to endow her with many +of the privileges of a disembodied spirit. + +Her pretensions, however, whether miraculous or otherwise, have +little to do with the present narrative--except, indeed, that I had +propounded, for the Veiled Lady's prophetic solution, a query as to +the success of our Blithedale enterprise. The response, by the bye, +was of the true Sibylline stamp,--nonsensical in its first aspect, +yet on closer study unfolding a variety of interpretations, one of +which has certainly accorded with the event. I was turning over this +riddle in my mind, and trying to catch its slippery purport by the +tail, when the old man above mentioned interrupted me. + +"Mr. Coverdale!--Mr. Coverdale!" said he, repeating my name twice, in +order to make up for the hesitating and ineffectual way in which he +uttered it. "I ask your pardon, sir, but I hear you are going to +Blithedale tomorrow." + +I knew the pale, elderly face, with the red-tipt nose, and the patch +over one eye; and likewise saw something characteristic in the old +fellow's way of standing under the arch of a gate, only revealing +enough of himself to make me recognize him as an acquaintance. He +was a very shy personage, this Mr. Moodie; and the trait was the more +singular, as his mode of getting his bread necessarily brought him +into the stir and hubbub of the world more than the generality of men. + +"Yes, Mr. Moodie," I answered, wondering what interest he could take +in the fact, "it is my intention to go to Blithedale to-morrow. Can +I be of any service to you before my departure?" + +"If you pleased, Mr. Coverdale," said he, "you might do me a very +great favor." + +"A very great one?" repeated I, in a tone that must have expressed +but little alacrity of beneficence, although I was ready to do the +old man any amount of kindness involving no special trouble to myself. +"A very great favor, do you say? My time is brief, Mr. Moodie, and +I have a good many preparations to make. But be good enough to tell +me what you wish." + +"Ah, sir," replied Old Moodie, "I don't quite like to do that; and, +on further thoughts, Mr. Coverdale, perhaps I had better apply to +some older gentleman, or to some lady, if you would have the kindness +to make me known to one, who may happen to be going to Blithedale. +You are a young man, sir!" + +"Does that fact lessen my availability for your purpose?" asked I. +"However, if an older man will suit you better, there is Mr. +Hollingsworth, who has three or four years the advantage of me in age, +and is a much more solid character, and a philanthropist to boot. I +am only a poet, and, so the critics tell me, no great affair at that! +But what can this business be, Mr. Moodie? It begins to interest me; +especially since your hint that a lady's influence might be found +desirable. Come, I am really anxious to be of service to you." + +But the old fellow, in his civil and demure manner, was both freakish +and obstinate; and he had now taken some notion or other into his +head that made him hesitate in his former design. + +"I wonder, sir," said he, "whether you know a lady whom they call +Zenobia?" + +"Not personally," I answered, "although I expect that pleasure +to-morrow, as she has got the start of the rest of us, and is already +a resident at Blithedale. But have you a literary turn, Mr. Moodie? +or have you taken up the advocacy of women's rights? or what else can +have interested you in this lady? Zenobia, by the bye, as I suppose +you know, is merely her public name; a sort of mask in which she +comes before the world, retaining all the privileges of privacy,--a +contrivance, in short, like the white drapery of the Veiled Lady, +only a little more transparent. But it is late. Will you tell me +what I can do for you?" + +"Please to excuse me to-night, Mr. Coverdale," said Moodie. "You are +very kind; but I am afraid I have troubled you, when, after all, +there may be no need. Perhaps, with your good leave, I will come to +your lodgings to-morrow morning, before you set out for Blithedale. +I wish you a good-night, sir, and beg pardon for stopping you." + +And so he slipt away; and, as he did not show himself the next +morning, it was only through subsequent events that I ever arrived at +a plausible conjecture as to what his business could have been. +Arriving at my room, I threw a lump of cannel coal upon the grate, +lighted a cigar, and spent an hour in musings of every hue, from the +brightest to the most sombre; being, in truth, not so very confident +as at some former periods that this final step, which would mix me up +irrevocably with the Blithedale affair, was the wisest that could +possibly be taken. It was nothing short of midnight when I went to +bed, after drinking a glass of particularly fine sherry on which I +used to pride myself in those days. It was the very last bottle; and +I finished it, with a friend, the next forenoon, before setting out +for Blithedale. + + + +II. BLITHEDALE + +There can hardly remain for me (who am really getting to be a frosty +bachelor, with another white hair, every week or so, in my mustache), +there can hardly flicker up again so cheery a blaze upon the hearth, +as that which I remember, the next day, at Blithedale. It was a wood +fire, in the parlor of an old farmhouse, on an April afternoon, but +with the fitful gusts of a wintry snowstorm roaring in the chimney. +Vividly does that fireside re-create itself, as I rake away the ashes +from the embers in my memory, and blow them up with a sigh, for lack +of more inspiring breath. Vividly for an instant, but anon, with the +dimmest gleam, and with just as little fervency for my heart as for +my finger-ends! The staunch oaken logs were long ago burnt out. +Their genial glow must be represented, if at all, by the merest +phosphoric glimmer, like that which exudes, rather than shines, from +damp fragments of decayed trees, deluding the benighted wanderer +through a forest. Around such chill mockery of a fire some few of us +might sit on the withered leaves, spreading out each a palm towards +the imaginary warmth, and talk over our exploded scheme for beginning +the life of Paradise anew. + +Paradise, indeed! Nobody else in the world, I am bold to +affirm--nobody, at least, in our bleak little world of New England,-- +had dreamed of Paradise that day except as the pole suggests the +tropic. Nor, with such materials as were at hand, could the most +skilful architect have constructed any better imitation of Eve's +bower than might be seen in the snow hut of an Esquimaux. But we +made a summer of it, in spite of the wild drifts. + +It was an April day, as already hinted, and well towards the middle +of the month. When morning dawned upon me, in town, its temperature +was mild enough to be pronounced even balmy, by a lodger, like myself, +in one of the midmost houses of a brick block,--each house partaking +of the warmth of all the rest, besides the sultriness of its +individual furnace--heat. But towards noon there had come snow, +driven along the street by a northeasterly blast, and whitening the +roofs and sidewalks with a business-like perseverance that would have +done credit to our severest January tempest. It set about its task +apparently as much in earnest as if it had been guaranteed from a +thaw for months to come. The greater, surely, was my heroism, when, +puffing out a final whiff of cigar-smoke, I quitted my cosey pair of +bachelor-rooms,--with a good fire burning in the grate, and a closet +right at hand, where there was still a bottle or two in the champagne +basket and a residuum of claret in a box,--quitted, I say, these +comfortable quarters, and plunged into the heart of the pitiless +snowstorm, in quest of a better life. + +The better life! Possibly, it would hardly look so now; it is enough +if it looked so then. The greatest obstacle to being heroic is the +doubt whether one may not be going to prove one's self a fool; the +truest heroism is to resist the doubt; and the profoundest wisdom to +know when it ought to be resisted, and when to be obeyed. + +Yet, after all, let us acknowledge it wiser, if not more sagacious, +to follow out one's daydream to its natural consummation, although, +if the vision have been worth the having, it is certain never to be +consummated otherwise than by a failure. And what of that? Its +airiest fragments, impalpable as they may be, will possess a value +that lurks not in the most ponderous realities of any practicable +scheme. They are not the rubbish of the mind. Whatever else I may +repent of, therefore, let it be reckoned neither among my sins nor +follies that I once had faith and force enough to form generous hopes +of the world's destiny--yes!--and to do what in me lay for their +accomplishment; even to the extent of quitting a warm fireside, +flinging away a freshly lighted cigar, and travelling far beyond the +strike of city clocks, through a drifting snowstorm. + +There were four of us who rode together through the storm; and +Hollingsworth, who had agreed to be of the number, was accidentally +delayed, and set forth at a later hour alone. As we threaded the +streets, I remember how the buildings on either side seemed to press +too closely upon us, insomuch that our mighty hearts found barely +room enough to throb between them. The snowfall, too, looked +inexpressibly dreary (I had almost called it dingy), coming down +through an atmosphere of city smoke, and alighting on the sidewalk +only to be moulded into the impress of somebody's patched boot or +overshoe. Thus the track of an old conventionalism was visible on +what was freshest from the sky. But when we left the pavements, and +our muffled hoof-tramps beat upon a desolate extent of country road, +and were effaced by the unfettered blast as soon as stamped, then +there was better air to breathe. Air that had not been breathed once +and again! air that had not been spoken into words of falsehood, +formality, and error, like all the air of the dusky city! + +"How pleasant it is!" remarked I, while the snowflakes flew into my +mouth the moment it was opened. "How very mild and balmy is this +country air!" + +"Ah, Coverdale, don't laugh at what little enthusiasm you have left!" +said one of my companions. "I maintain that this nitrous atmosphere +is really exhilarating; and, at any rate, we can never call ourselves +regenerated men till a February northeaster shall be as grateful to +us as the softest breeze of June!" + +So we all of us took courage, riding fleetly and merrily along, by +stone fences that were half buried in the wave-like drifts; and +through patches of woodland, where the tree-trunks opposed a +snow-incrusted side towards the northeast; and within ken of deserted +villas, with no footprints in their avenues; and passed scattered +dwellings, whence puffed the smoke of country fires, strongly +impregnated with the pungent aroma of burning peat. Sometimes, +encountering a traveller, we shouted a friendly greeting; and he, +unmuffling his ears to the bluster and the snow-spray, and listening +eagerly, appeared to think our courtesy worth less than the trouble +which it cost him. The churl! He understood the shrill whistle of +the blast, but had no intelligence for our blithe tones of +brotherhood. This lack of faith in our cordial sympathy, on the +traveller's part, was one among the innumerable tokens how difficult +a task we had in hand for the reformation of the world. We rode on, +however, with still unflagging spirits, and made such good +companionship with the tempest that, at our journey's end, we +professed ourselves almost loath to bid the rude blusterer good-by. +But, to own the truth, I was little better than an icicle, and began +to be suspicious that I had caught a fearful cold. + +And now we were seated by the brisk fireside of the old farmhouse, +the same fire that glimmers so faintly among my reminiscences at the +beginning of this chapter. There we sat, with the snow melting out +of our hair and beards, and our faces all ablaze, what with the past +inclemency and present warmth. It was, indeed, a right good fire +that we found awaiting us, built up of great, rough logs, and knotty +limbs, and splintered fragments of an oak-tree, such as farmers are +wont to keep for their own hearths, since these crooked and +unmanageable boughs could never be measured into merchantable cords +for the market. A family of the old Pilgrims might have swung their +kettle over precisely such a fire as this, only, no doubt, a bigger +one; and, contrasting it with my coal-grate, I felt so much the more +that we had transported ourselves a world-wide distance from the +system of society that shackled us at breakfast-time. + +Good, comfortable Mrs. Foster (the wife of stout Silas Foster, who +was to manage the farm at a fair stipend, and be our tutor in the art +of husbandry) bade us a hearty welcome. At her back--a back of +generous breadth--appeared two young women, smiling most hospitably, +but looking rather awkward withal, as not well knowing what was to be +their position in our new arrangement of the world. We shook hands +affectionately all round, and congratulated ourselves that the +blessed state of brotherhood and sisterhood, at which we aimed, might +fairly be dated from this moment. Our greetings were hardly +concluded when the door opened, and Zenobia--whom I had never before +seen, important as was her place in our enterprise--Zenobia entered +the parlor. + +This (as the reader, if at all acquainted with our literary biography, +need scarcely be told) was not her real name. She had assumed it, +in the first instance, as her magazine signature; and, as it accorded +well with something imperial which her friends attributed to this +lady's figure and deportment, they half-laughingly adopted it in +their familiar intercourse with her. She took the appellation in +good part, and even encouraged its constant use; which, in fact, was +thus far appropriate, that our Zenobia, however humble looked her new +philosophy, had as much native pride as any queen would have known +what to do with. + + + +III. A KNOT OF DREAMERS + +Zenobia bade us welcome, in a fine, frank, mellow voice, and gave +each of us her hand, which was very soft and warm. She had something +appropriate, I recollect, to say to every individual; and what she +said to myself was this:--"I have long wished to know you, Mr. +Coverdale, and to thank you for your beautiful poetry, some of which +I have learned by heart; or rather it has stolen into my memory, +without my exercising any choice or volition about the matter. Of +course--permit me to say you do not think of relinquishing an +occupation in which you have done yourself so much credit. I would +almost rather give you up as an associate, than that the world should +lose one of its true poets!" + +"Ah, no; there will not be the slightest danger of that, especially +after this inestimable praise from Zenobia," said I, smiling, and +blushing, no doubt, with excess of pleasure. "I hope, on the +contrary, now to produce something that shall really deserve to be +called poetry,--true, strong, natural, and sweet, as is the life +which we are going to lead,--something that shall have the notes of +wild birds twittering through it, or a strain like the wind anthems +in the woods, as the case may be." + +"Is it irksome to you to hear your own verses sung?" asked Zenobia, +with a gracious smile. "If so, I am very sorry, for you will +certainly hear me singing them sometimes, in the summer evenings." + +"Of all things," answered I, "that is what will delight me most." + +While this passed, and while she spoke to my companions, I was taking +note of Zenobia's aspect; and it impressed itself on me so distinctly, +that I can now summon her up, like a ghost, a little wanner than the +life but otherwise identical with it. She was dressed as simply as +possible, in an American print (I think the dry-goods people call it +so), but with a silken kerchief, between which and her gown there was +one glimpse of a white shoulder. It struck me as a great piece of +good fortune that there should be just that glimpse. Her hair, which +was dark, glossy, and of singular abundance, was put up rather +soberly and primly--without curls, or other ornament, except a single +flower. It was an exotic of rare beauty, and as fresh as if the +hothouse gardener had just clipt it from the stem. That flower has +struck deep root into my memory. I can both see it and smell it, at +this moment. So brilliant, so rare, so costly as it must have been, +and yet enduring only for a day, it was more indicative of the pride +and pomp which had a luxuriant growth in Zenobia's character than if +a great diamond had sparkled among her hair. + +Her hand, though very soft, was larger than most women would like to +have, or than they could afford to have, though not a whit too large +in proportion with the spacious plan of Zenobia's entire development. +It did one good to see a fine intellect (as hers really was, +although its natural tendency lay in another direction than towards +literature) so fitly cased. She was, indeed, an admirable figure of +a woman, just on the hither verge of her richest maturity, with a +combination of features which it is safe to call remarkably beautiful, +even if some fastidious persons might pronounce them a little +deficient in softness and delicacy. But we find enough of those +attributes everywhere. Preferable--by way of variety, at least--was +Zenobia's bloom, health, and vigor, which she possessed in such +overflow that a man might well have fallen in love with her for their +sake only. In her quiet moods, she seemed rather indolent; but when +really in earnest, particularly if there were a spice of bitter +feeling, she grew all alive to her finger-tips. + +"I am the first comer," Zenobia went on to say, while her smile +beamed warmth upon us all; "so I take the part of hostess for to-day, +and welcome you as if to my own fireside. You shall be my guests, +too, at supper. Tomorrow, if you please, we will be brethren and +sisters, and begin our new life from daybreak." + +"Have we our various parts assigned?" asked some one. + +"Oh, we of the softer sex," responded Zenobia, with her mellow, +almost broad laugh,--most delectable to hear, but not in the least +like an ordinary woman's laugh,--"we women (there are four of us here +already) will take the domestic and indoor part of the business, as a +matter of course. To bake, to boil, to roast, to fry, to stew,--to +wash, and iron, and scrub, and sweep,--and, at our idler intervals, +to repose ourselves on knitting and sewing,--these, I suppose, must +be feminine occupations, for the present. By and by, perhaps, when +our individual adaptations begin to develop themselves, it may be +that some of us who wear the petticoat will go afield, and leave the +weaker brethren to take our places in the kitchen." + +"What a pity," I remarked, "that the kitchen, and the housework +generally, cannot be left out of our system altogether! It is odd +enough that the kind of labor which falls to the lot of women is just +that which chiefly distinguishes artificial life--the life of +degenerated mortals--from the life of Paradise. Eve had no +dinner-pot, and no clothes to mend, and no washing-day." + +"I am afraid," said Zenobia, with mirth gleaming out of her eyes, "we +shall find some difficulty in adopting the paradisiacal system for at +least a month to come. Look at that snowdrift sweeping past the +window! Are there any figs ripe, do you think? Have the pineapples +been gathered to-day? Would you like a bread-fruit, or a cocoanut? +Shall I run out and pluck you some roses? No, no, Mr. Coverdale; the +only flower hereabouts is the one in my hair, which I got out of a +greenhouse this morning. As for the garb of Eden," added she, +shivering playfully, "I shall not assume it till after May-day!" + +Assuredly Zenobia could not have intended it,--the fault must have +been entirely in my imagination. But these last words, together with +something in her manner, irresistibly brought up a picture of that +fine, perfectly developed figure, in Eve's earliest garment. Her +free, careless, generous modes of expression often had this effect of +creating images which, though pure, are hardly felt to be quite +decorous when born of a thought that passes between man and woman. I +imputed it, at that time, to Zenobia's noble courage, conscious of no +harm, and scorning the petty restraints which take the life and color +out of other women's conversation. There was another peculiarity +about her. We seldom meet with women nowadays, and in this country, +who impress us as being women at all,--their sex fades away and goes +for nothing, in ordinary intercourse. Not so with Zenobia. One felt +an influence breathing out of her such as we might suppose to come +from Eve, when she was just made, and her Creator brought her to Adam, +saying, "Behold! here is a woman!" Not that I would convey the idea +of especial gentleness, grace, modesty, and shyness, but of a certain +warm and rich characteristic, which seems, for the most part, to have +been refined away out of the feminine system. + +"And now," continued Zenobia, "I must go and help get supper. Do you +think you can be content, instead of figs, pineapples, and all the +other delicacies of Adam's supper-table, with tea and toast, and a +certain modest supply of ham and tongue, which, with the instinct of +a housewife, I brought hither in a basket? And there shall be bread +and milk, too, if the innocence of your taste demands it." + +The whole sisterhood now went about their domestic avocations, +utterly declining our offers to assist, further than by bringing wood +for the kitchen fire from a huge pile in the back yard. After +heaping up more than a sufficient quantity, we returned to the +sitting-room, drew our chairs close to the hearth, and began to talk +over our prospects. Soon, with a tremendous stamping in the entry, +appeared Silas Foster, lank, stalwart, uncouth, and grizzly-bearded. +He came from foddering the cattle in the barn, and from the field, +where he had been ploughing, until the depth of the snow rendered it +impossible to draw a furrow. He greeted us in pretty much the same +tone as if he were speaking to his oxen, took a quid from his iron +tobacco-box, pulled off his wet cowhide boots, and sat down before +the fire in his stocking-feet. The steam arose from his soaked +garments, so that the stout yeoman looked vaporous and spectre-like. + +"Well, folks," remarked Silas, "you'll be wishing yourselves back to +town again, if this weather holds." + +And, true enough, there was a look of gloom, as the twilight fell +silently and sadly out of the sky, its gray or sable flakes +intermingling themselves with the fast-descending snow. The storm, +in its evening aspect, was decidedly dreary. It seemed to have +arisen for our especial behoof,--a symbol of the cold, desolate, +distrustful phantoms that invariably haunt the mind, on the eve of +adventurous enterprises, to warn us back within the boundaries of +ordinary life. + +But our courage did not quail. We would not allow ourselves to be +depressed by the snowdrift trailing past the window, any more than if +it had been the sigh of a summer wind among rustling boughs. There +have been few brighter seasons for us than that. If ever men might +lawfully dream awake, and give utterance to their wildest visions +without dread of laughter or scorn on the part of the audience,--yes, +and speak of earthly happiness, for themselves and mankind, as an +object to be hopefully striven for, and probably attained, we who +made that little semicircle round the blazing fire were those very +men. We had left the rusty iron framework of society behind us; we +had broken through many hindrances that are powerful enough to keep +most people on the weary treadmill of the established system, even +while they feel its irksomeness almost as intolerable as we did. We +had stepped down from the pulpit; we had flung aside the pen; we had +shut up the ledger; we had thrown off that sweet, bewitching, +enervating indolence, which is better, after all, than most of the +enjoyments within mortal grasp. It was our purpose--a generous one, +certainly, and absurd, no doubt, in full proportion with its +generosity--to give up whatever we had heretofore attained, for the +sake of showing mankind the example of a life governed by other than +the false and cruel principles on which human society has all along +been based. + +And, first of all, we had divorced ourselves from pride, and were +striving to supply its place with familiar love. We meant to lessen +the laboring man's great burden of toil, by performing our due share +of it at the cost of our own thews and sinews. We sought our profit +by mutual aid, instead of wresting it by the strong hand from an +enemy, or filching it craftily from those less shrewd than ourselves +(if, indeed, there were any such in New England), or winning it by +selfish competition with a neighbor; in one or another of which +fashions every son of woman both perpetrates and suffers his share of +the common evil, whether he chooses it or no. And, as the basis of +our institution, we purposed to offer up the earnest toil of our +bodies, as a prayer no less than an effort for the advancement of our +race. + +Therefore, if we built splendid castles (phalansteries perhaps they +might be more fitly called), and pictured beautiful scenes, among the +fervid coals of the hearth around which we were clustering, and if +all went to rack with the crumbling embers and have never since +arisen out of the ashes, let us take to ourselves no shame. In my +own behalf, I rejoice that I could once think better of the world's +improvability than it deserved. It is a mistake into which men +seldom fall twice in a lifetime; or, if so, the rarer and higher is +the nature that can thus magnanimously persist in error. + +Stout Silas Foster mingled little in our conversation; but when he +did speak, it was very much to some practical purpose. For instance:-- +"Which man among you," quoth he, "is the best judge of swine? Some +of us must go to the next Brighton fair, and buy half a dozen pigs." + +Pigs! Good heavens! had we come out from among the swinish multitude +for this? And again, in reference to some discussion about raising +early vegetables for the market:--"We shall never make any hand at +market gardening," said Silas Foster, "unless the women folks will +undertake to do all the weeding. We haven't team enough for that and +the regular farm-work, reckoning three of your city folks as worth +one common field-hand. No, no; I tell you, we should have to get up +a little too early in the morning, to compete with the market +gardeners round Boston." + +It struck me as rather odd, that one of the first questions raised, +after our separation from the greedy, struggling, self-seeking world, +should relate to the possibility of getting the advantage over the +outside barbarians in their own field of labor. But, to own the +truth, I very soon became sensible that, as regarded society at large, +we stood in a position of new hostility, rather than new brotherhood. +Nor could this fail to be the case, in some degree, until the +bigger and better half of society should range itself on our side. +Constituting so pitiful a minority as now, we were inevitably +estranged from the rest of mankind in pretty fair proportion with the +strictness of our mutual bond among ourselves. + +This dawning idea, however, was driven back into my inner +consciousness by the entrance of Zenobia. She came with the welcome +intelligence that supper was on the table. Looking at herself in the +glass, and perceiving that her one magnificent flower had grown +rather languid (probably by being exposed to the fervency of the +kitchen fire), she flung it on the floor, as unconcernedly as a +village girl would throw away a faded violet. The action seemed +proper to her character, although, methought, it would still more +have befitted the bounteous nature of this beautiful woman to scatter +fresh flowers from her hand, and to revive faded ones by her touch. +Nevertheless, it was a singular but irresistible effect; the presence +of Zenobia caused our heroic enterprise to show like an illusion, a +masquerade, a pastoral, a counterfeit Arcadia, in which we grown-up +men and women were making a play-day of the years that were given us +to live in. I tried to analyze this impression, but not with much +success. + +"It really vexes me," observed Zenobia, as we left the room, "that Mr. +Hollingsworth should be such a laggard. I should not have thought +him at all the sort of person to be turned back by a puff of contrary +wind, or a few snowflakes drifting into his face." + +"Do you know Hollingsworth personally?" I inquired. + +"No; only as an auditor--auditress, I mean--of some of his lectures," +said she. "What a voice he has! and what a man he is! Yet not so +much an intellectual man, I should say, as a great heart; at least, +he moved me more deeply than I think myself capable of being moved, +except by the stroke of a true, strong heart against my own. It is a +sad pity that he should have devoted his glorious powers to such a +grimy, unbeautiful, and positively hopeless object as this +reformation of criminals, about which he makes himself and his +wretchedly small audiences so very miserable. To tell you a secret, +I never could tolerate a philanthropist before. Could you?" + +"By no means," I answered; "neither can I now." + +"They are, indeed, an odiously disagreeable set of mortals," +continued Zenobia. "I should like Mr. Hollingsworth a great deal +better if the philanthropy had been left out. At all events, as a +mere matter of taste, I wish he would let the bad people alone, and +try to benefit those who are not already past his help. Do you +suppose he will be content to spend his life, or even a few months of +it, among tolerably virtuous and comfortable individuals like +ourselves?" + +"Upon my word, I doubt it," said I. "If we wish to keep him with us, +we must systematically commit at least one crime apiece! Mere +peccadillos will not satisfy him." + +Zenobia turned, sidelong, a strange kind of a glance upon me; but, +before I could make out what it meant, we had entered the kitchen, +where, in accordance with the rustic simplicity of our new life, the +supper-table was spread. + + + +IV. THE SUPPER-TABLE + +The pleasant firelight! I must still keep harping on it. The +kitchen hearth had an old-fashioned breadth, depth, and spaciousness, +far within which lay what seemed the butt of a good-sized oak-tree, +with the moisture bubbling merrily out at both ends. It was now half +an hour beyond dusk. The blaze from an armful of substantial sticks, +rendered more combustible by brushwood and pine, flickered powerfully +on the smoke-blackened walls, and so cheered our spirits that we +cared not what inclemency might rage and roar on the other side of +our illuminated windows. A yet sultrier warmth was bestowed by a +goodly quantity of peat, which was crumbling to white ashes among the +burning brands, and incensed the kitchen with its not ungrateful +fragrance. The exuberance of this household fire would alone have +sufficed to bespeak us no true farmers; for the New England yeoman, +if he have the misfortune to dwell within practicable distance of a +wood-market, is as niggardly of each stick as if it were a bar of +California gold. + +But it was fortunate for us, on that wintry eve of our untried life, +to enjoy the warm and radiant luxury of a somewhat too abundant fire. +If it served no other purpose, it made the men look so full of youth, +warm blood, and hope, and the women--such of them, at least, as were +anywise convertible by its magic--so very beautiful, that I would +cheerfully have spent my last dollar to prolong the blaze. As for +Zenobia, there was a glow in her cheeks that made me think of Pandora, +fresh from Vulcan's workshop, and full of the celestial warmth by +dint of which he had tempered and moulded her. + +"Take your places, my dear friends all," cried she; "seat yourselves +without ceremony, and you shall be made happy with such tea as not +many of the world's working-people, except yourselves, will find in +their cups to-night. After this one supper, you may drink buttermilk, +if you please. To-night we will quaff this nectar, which, I assure +you, could not be bought with gold." + +We all sat down,--grizzly Silas Foster, his rotund helpmate, and the +two bouncing handmaidens, included,--and looked at one another in a +friendly but rather awkward way. It was the first practical trial of +our theories of equal brotherhood and sisterhood; and we people of +superior cultivation and refinement (for as such, I presume, we +unhesitatingly reckoned ourselves) felt as if something were already +accomplished towards the millennium of love. The truth is, however, +that the laboring + +oar was with our unpolished companions; it being far easier to +condescend than to accept of condescension. Neither did I refrain +from questioning, in secret, whether some of us--and Zenobia among +the rest--would so quietly have taken our places among these good +people, save for the cherished consciousness that it was not by +necessity but choice. Though we saw fit to drink our tea out of +earthen cups to-night, and in earthen company, it was at our own +option to use pictured porcelain and handle silver forks again +to-morrow. This same salvo, as to the power of regaining our former +position, contributed much, I fear, to the equanimity with which we +subsequently bore many of the hardships and humiliations of a life of +toil. If ever I have deserved (which has not often been the case, +and, I think, never), but if ever I did deserve to be soundly cuffed +by a fellow mortal, for secretly putting weight upon some imaginary +social advantage, it must have been while I was striving to prove +myself ostentatiously his equal and no more. It was while I sat +beside him on his cobbler's bench, or clinked my hoe against his own +in the cornfield, or broke the same crust of bread, my earth-grimed +hand to his, at our noontide lunch. The poor, proud man should look +at both sides of sympathy like this. + +The silence which followed upon our sitting down to table grew rather +oppressive; indeed, it was hardly broken by a word, during the first +round of Zenobia's fragrant tea. + +"I hope," said I, at last, "that our blazing windows will be visible +a great way off. There is nothing so pleasant and encouraging to a +solitary traveller, on a stormy night, as a flood of firelight seen +amid the gloom. These ruddy window panes cannot fail to cheer the +hearts of all that look at them. Are they not warm with the +beacon-fire which we have kindled for humanity?" + +"The blaze of that brushwood will only last a minute or two longer," +observed Silas Foster; but whether he meant to insinuate that our +moral illumination would have as brief a term, I cannot say. + +"Meantime," said Zenobia, "it may serve to guide some wayfarer to a +shelter." + +And, just as she said this, there came a knock at the house door. + +"There is one of the world's wayfarers," said I. "Ay, ay, just so!" +quoth Silas Foster. "Our firelight will draw stragglers, just as a +candle draws dorbugs on a summer night." + +Whether to enjoy a dramatic suspense, or that we were selfishly +contrasting our own comfort with the chill and dreary situation of +the unknown person at the threshold, or that some of us city folk +felt a little startled at the knock which came so unseasonably, +through night and storm, to the door of the lonely farmhouse,--so it +happened that nobody, for an instant or two, arose to answer the +summons. Pretty soon there came another knock. The first had been +moderately loud; the second was smitten so forcibly that the knuckles +of the applicant must have left their mark in the door panel. + +"He knocks as if he had a right to come in," said Zenobia, laughing. +"And what are we thinking of?--It must be Mr. Hollingsworth!" + +Hereupon I went to the door, unbolted, and flung it wide open. There, +sure enough, stood Hollingsworth, his shaggy greatcoat all covered +with snow, so that he looked quite as much like a polar bear as a +modern philanthropist. + +"Sluggish hospitality this!" said he, in those deep tones of his, +which seemed to come out of a chest as capacious as a barrel. "It +would have served you right if I had lain down and spent the night on +the doorstep, just for the sake of putting you to shame. But here is +a guest who will need a warmer and softer bed." + +And, stepping back to the wagon in which he had journeyed hither, +Hollingsworth received into his arms and deposited on the doorstep a +figure enveloped in a cloak. It was evidently a woman; or, rather,-- +judging from the ease with which he lifted her, and the little +space which she seemed to fill in his arms, a slim and unsubstantial +girl. As she showed some hesitation about entering the door, +Hollingsworth, with his usual directness and lack of ceremony, urged +her forward not merely within the entry, but into the warm and +strongly lighted kitchen. + +"Who is this?" whispered I, remaining behind with him, while he was +taking off his greatcoat. + +"Who? Really, I don't know," answered Hollingsworth, looking at me +with some surprise. "It is a young person who belongs here, however; +and no doubt she had been expected. Zenobia, or some of the women +folks, can tell you all about it." + +"I think not," said I, glancing towards the new-comer and the other +occupants of the kitchen. "Nobody seems to welcome her. I should +hardly judge that she was an expected guest." + +"Well, well," said Hollingsworth quietly, "We'll make it right." + +The stranger, or whatever she were, remained standing precisely on +that spot of the kitchen floor to which Hollingsworth's kindly hand +had impelled her. The cloak falling partly off, she was seen to be a +very young woman dressed in a poor but decent gown, made high in the +neck, and without any regard to fashion or smartness. Her brown hair +fell down from beneath a hood, not in curls but with only a slight +wave; her face was of a wan, almost sickly hue, betokening habitual +seclusion from the sun and free atmosphere, like a flower-shrub that +had done its best to blossom in too scanty light. To complete the +pitiableness of her aspect, she shivered either with cold, or fear, +or nervous excitement, so that you might have beheld her shadow +vibrating on the fire-lighted wall. In short, there has seldom been +seen so depressed and sad a figure as this young girl's; and it was +hardly possible to help being angry with her, from mere despair of +doing anything for her comfort. The fantasy occurred to me that she +was some desolate kind of a creature, doomed to wander about in +snowstorms; and that, though the ruddiness of our window panes had +tempted her into a human dwelling, she would not remain long enough +to melt the icicles out of her hair. Another conjecture likewise +came into my mind. Recollecting Hollingsworth's sphere of +philanthropic action, I deemed it possible that he might have brought +one of his guilty patients, to be wrought upon and restored to +spiritual health by the pure influences which our mode of life would +create. + +As yet the girl had not stirred. She stood near the door, fixing a +pair of large, brown, melancholy eyes upon Zenobia--only upon Zenobia!-- +she evidently saw nothing else in the room save that bright, fair, +rosy, beautiful woman. It was the strangest look I ever witnessed; +long a mystery to me, and forever a memory. Once she seemed about to +move forward and greet her,--I know not with what warmth or with what +words,--but, finally, instead of doing so, she dropped down upon her +knees, clasped her hands, and gazed piteously into Zenobia's face. +Meeting no kindly reception, her head fell on her bosom. + +I never thoroughly forgave Zenobia for her conduct on this occasion. +But women are always more cautious in their casual hospitalities than +men. + +"What does the girl mean?" cried she in rather a sharp tone. "Is she +crazy? Has she no tongue?" + +And here Hollingsworth stepped forward. + +"No wonder if the poor child's tongue is frozen in her mouth," said +he; and I think he positively frowned at Zenobia. "The very heart +will be frozen in her bosom, unless you women can warm it, among you, +with the warmth that ought to be in your own!" + +Hollingsworth's appearance was very striking at this moment. He was +then about thirty years old, but looked several years older, with his +great shaggy head, his heavy brow, his dark complexion, his abundant +beard, and the rude strength with which his features seemed to have +been hammered out of iron, rather than chiselled or moulded from any +finer or softer material. His figure was not tall, but massive and +brawny, and well befitting his original occupation; which as the +reader probably knows--was that of a blacksmith. As for external +polish, or mere courtesy of manner, he never possessed more than a +tolerably educated bear; although, in his gentler moods, there was a +tenderness in his voice, eyes, mouth, in his gesture, and in every +indescribable manifestation, which few men could resist and no woman. +But he now looked stern and reproachful; and it was with that +inauspicious meaning in his glance that Hollingsworth first met +Zenobia's eyes, and began his influence upon her life. + +To my surprise, Zenobia--of whose haughty spirit I had been told so +many examples--absolutely changed color, and seemed mortified and +confused. + +"You do not quite do me justice, Mr. Hollingsworth," said she almost +humbly. "I am willing to be kind to the poor girl. Is she a +protegee of yours? What can I do for her?" + +"Have you anything to ask of this lady?" said Hollingsworth kindly to +the girl. "I remember you mentioned her name before we left town." + +"Only that she will shelter me," replied the girl tremulously. "Only +that she will let me be always near her." + +"Well, indeed," exclaimed Zenobia, recovering herself and laughing, +"this is an adventure, and well-worthy to be the first incident in +our life of love and free-heartedness! But I accept it, for the +present, without further question, only," added she, "it would be a +convenience if we knew your name." + +"Priscilla," said the girl; and it appeared to me that she hesitated +whether to add anything more, and decided in the negative. "Pray do +not ask me my other name,--at least not yet,--if you will be so kind +to a forlorn creature." + +Priscilla!--Priscilla! I repeated the name to myself three or four +times; and in that little space, this quaint and prim cognomen had so +amalgamated itself with my idea of the girl, that it seemed as if no +other name could have adhered to her for a moment. Heretofore the +poor thing had not shed any tears; but now that she found herself +received, and at least temporarily established, the big drops began +to ooze out from beneath her eyelids as if she were full of them. +Perhaps it showed the iron substance of my heart, that I could not +help smiling at this odd scene of unknown and unaccountable calamity, +into which our cheerful party had been entrapped without the liberty +of choosing whether to sympathize or no. Hollingsworth's behavior +was certainly a great deal more creditable than mine. + +"Let us not pry further into her secrets," he said to Zenobia and the +rest of us, apart; and his dark, shaggy face looked really beautiful +with its expression of thoughtful benevolence. "Let us conclude that +Providence has sent her to us, as the first-fruits of the world, +which we have undertaken to make happier than we find it. Let us +warm her poor, shivering body with this good fire, and her poor, +shivering heart with our best kindness. Let us feed her, and make +her one of us. As we do by this friendless girl, so shall we prosper. +And, in good time, whatever is desirable for us to know will be +melted out of her, as inevitably as those tears which we see now." + +"At least," remarked I, "you may tell us how and where you met with +her." + +"An old man brought her to my lodgings," answered Hollingsworth, "and +begged me to convey her to Blithedale, where--so I understood +him--she had friends; and this is positively all I know about the +matter." + +Grim Silas Foster, all this while, had been busy at the supper-table, +pouring out his own tea and gulping it down with no more sense of its +exquisiteness than if it were a decoction of catnip; helping himself +to pieces of dipt toast on the flat of his knife blade, and dropping +half of it on the table-cloth; using the same serviceable implement +to cut slice after slice of ham; perpetrating terrible enormities +with the butter-plate; and in all other respects behaving less like a +civilized Christian than the worst kind of an ogre. Being by this +time fully gorged, he crowned his amiable exploits with a draught +from the water pitcher, and then favored us with his opinion about +the business in hand. And, certainly, though they proceeded out of +an unwiped mouth, his expressions did him honor. + +"Give the girl a hot cup of tea and a thick slice of this first-rate +bacon," said Silas, like a sensible man as he was. "That's what she +wants. Let her stay with us as long as she likes, and help in the +kitchen, and take the cow-breath at milking time; and, in a week or +two, she'll begin to look like a creature of this world." + +So we sat down again to supper, and Priscilla along with us. + + + +V. UNTIL BEDTIME + +Silas Foster, by the time we concluded our meal, had stript off his +coat, and planted himself on a low chair by the kitchen fire, with a +lapstone, a hammer, a piece of sole leather, and some waxed-ends, in +order to cobble an old pair of cowhide boots; he being, in his own +phrase, "something of a dab" (whatever degree of skill that may +imply) at the shoemaking business. We heard the tap of his hammer at +intervals for the rest of the evening. The remainder of the party +adjourned to the sitting-room. Good Mrs. Foster took her +knitting-work, and soon fell fast asleep, still keeping her needles +in brisk movement, and, to the best of my observation, absolutely +footing a stocking out of the texture of a dream. And a very +substantial stocking it seemed to be. One of the two handmaidens +hemmed a towel, and the other appeared to be making a ruffle, for her +Sunday's wear, out of a little bit of embroidered muslin which +Zenobia had probably given her. + +It was curious to observe how trustingly, and yet how timidly, our +poor Priscilla betook herself into the shadow of Zenobia's protection. +She sat beside her on a stool, looking up every now and then with +an expression of humble delight at her new friend's beauty. A +brilliant woman is often an object of the devoted admiration--it +might almost be termed worship, or idolatry--of some young girl, who +perhaps beholds the cynosure only at an awful distance, and has as +little hope of personal intercourse as of climbing among the stars of +heaven. We men are too gross to comprehend it. Even a woman, of +mature age, despises or laughs at such a passion. There occurred to +me no mode of accounting for Priscilla's behavior, except by +supposing that she had read some of Zenobia's stories (as such +literature goes everywhere), or her tracts in defence of the sex, and +had come hither with the one purpose of being her slave. There is +nothing parallel to this, I believe,--nothing so foolishly +disinterested, and hardly anything so beautiful,--in the masculine +nature, at whatever epoch of life; or, if there be, a fine and rare +development of character might reasonably be looked for from the +youth who should prove himself capable of such self-forgetful +affection. + +Zenobia happening to change her seat, I took the opportunity, in an +undertone, to suggest some such notion as the above. + +"Since you see the young woman in so poetical a light," replied she +in the same tone, "you had better turn the affair into a ballad. It +is a + +grand subject, and worthy of supernatural machinery. The storm, the +startling knock at the door, the entrance of the sable knight +Hollingsworth and this shadowy snow-maiden, who, precisely at the +stroke of midnight, shall melt away at my feet in a pool of ice-cold +water and give me my death with a pair of wet slippers! And when the +verses are written, and polished quite to your mind, I will favor you +with my idea as to what the girl really is." + +"Pray let me have it now," said I; "it shall be woven into the ballad." + +"She is neither more nor less," answered Zenobia, "than a seamstress +from the city; and she has probably no more transcendental purpose +than to do my miscellaneous sewing, for I suppose she will hardly +expect to make my dresses." + +"How can you decide upon her so easily?" I inquired. + +"Oh, we women judge one another by tokens that escape the obtuseness +of masculine perceptions!" said Zenobia. "There is no proof which +you would be likely to appreciate, except the needle marks on the tip +of her forefinger. Then, my supposition perfectly accounts for her +paleness, her nervousness, and her wretched fragility. Poor thing! +She has been stifled with the heat of a salamander stove, in a small, +close room, and has drunk coffee, and fed upon doughnuts, raisins, +candy, and all such trash, till she is scarcely half alive; and so, +as she has hardly any physique, a poet like Mr. Miles Coverdale may +be allowed to think her spiritual." + +"Look at her now!" whispered I. + +Priscilla was gazing towards us with an inexpressible sorrow in her +wan face and great tears running down her cheeks. It was difficult +to resist the impression that, cautiously as we had lowered our +voices, she must have overheard and been wounded by Zenobia's +scornful estimate of her character and purposes. + +"What ears the girl must have!" whispered Zenobia, with a look of +vexation, partly comic and partly real. "I will confess to you that +I cannot quite make her out. However, I am positively not an +ill-natured person, unless when very grievously provoked,--and as you, +and especially Mr. Hollingsworth, take so much interest in this odd +creature, and as she knocks with a very slight tap against my own +heart likewise,--why, I mean to let her in. From this moment I will +be reasonably kind to her. There is no pleasure in tormenting a +person of one's own sex, even if she do favor one with a little more +love than one can conveniently dispose of; and that, let me say, Mr. +Coverdale, is the most troublesome offence you can offer to a woman." + +"Thank you," said I, smiling; "I don't mean to be guilty of it." + +She went towards Priscilla, took her hand, and passed her own rosy +finger-tips, with a pretty, caressing movement, over the girl's hair. +The touch had a magical effect. So vivid a look of joy flushed up +beneath those fingers, that it seemed as if the sad and wan Priscilla +had been snatched away, and another kind of creature substituted in +her place. This one caress, bestowed voluntarily by Zenobia, was +evidently received as a pledge of all that the stranger sought from +her, whatever the unuttered boon might be. From that instant, too, +she melted in quietly amongst us, and was no longer a foreign element. +Though always an object of peculiar interest, a riddle, and a theme +of frequent discussion, her tenure at Blithedale was thenceforth +fixed. We no more thought of questioning it, than if Priscilla had +been recognized as a domestic sprite, who had haunted the rustic +fireside of old, before we had ever been warmed by its blaze. + +She now produced, out of a work-bag that she had with her, some +little wooden instruments (what they are called I never knew), and +proceeded to knit, or net, an article which ultimately took the shape +of a silk purse. As the work went on, I remembered to have seen just +such purses before; indeed, I was the possessor of one. Their +peculiar excellence, besides the great delicacy and beauty of the +manufacture, lay in the almost impossibility that any uninitiated +person should discover the aperture; although, to a practised touch, +they would open as wide as charity or prodigality might wish. I +wondered if it were not a symbol of Priscilla's own mystery. + +Notwithstanding the new confidence with which Zenobia had inspired +her, our guest showed herself disquieted by the storm. When the +strong puffs of wind spattered the snow against the windows and made +the oaken frame of the farmhouse creak, she looked at us +apprehensively, as if to inquire whether these tempestuous outbreaks +did not betoken some unusual mischief in the shrieking blast. She +had been bred up, no doubt, in some close nook, some inauspiciously +sheltered court of the city, where the uttermost rage of a tempest, +though it might scatter down the slates of the roof into the bricked +area, could not shake the casement of her little room. The sense of +vast, undefined space, pressing from the outside against the black +panes of our uncurtained windows, was fearful to the poor girl, +heretofore accustomed to the narrowness of human limits, with the +lamps of neighboring tenements glimmering across the street. The +house probably seemed to her adrift on the great ocean of the night. +A little parallelogram of sky was all that she had hitherto known of +nature, so that she felt the awfulness that really exists in its +limitless extent. Once, while the blast was bellowing, she caught +hold of Zenobia's robe, with precisely the air of one who hears her +own name spoken at a distance, but is unutterably reluctant to obey +the call. + +We spent rather an incommunicative evening. Hollingsworth hardly +said a word, unless when repeatedly and pertinaciously addressed. +Then, indeed, he would glare upon us from the thick shrubbery of his +meditations like a tiger out of a jungle, make the briefest reply +possible, and betake himself back into the solitude of his heart and +mind. The poor fellow had contracted this ungracious habit from the +intensity with which he contemplated his own ideas, and the +infrequent sympathy which they met with from his auditors,--a +circumstance that seemed only to strengthen the implicit confidence +that he awarded to them. His heart, I imagine, was never really +interested in our socialist scheme, but was forever busy with his +strange, and, as most people thought it, impracticable plan, for the +reformation of criminals through an appeal to their higher instincts. + +Much as I liked Hollingsworth, it cost me many a groan to tolerate +him on this point. He ought to have commenced his investigation of +the subject by perpetrating some huge sin in his proper person, and +examining the condition of his higher instincts afterwards. + +The rest of us formed ourselves into a committee for providing our +infant community with an appropriate name,--a matter of greatly more +difficulty than the uninitiated reader would suppose. Blithedale was +neither good nor bad. We should have resumed the old Indian name of +the premises, had it possessed the oil-and-honey flow which the +aborigines were so often happy in communicating to their local +appellations; but it chanced to be a harsh, ill-connected, and +interminable word, which seemed to fill the mouth with a mixture of +very stiff clay and very crumbly pebbles. Zenobia suggested "Sunny +Glimpse," as expressive of a vista into a better system of society. +This we turned over and over for a while, acknowledging its +prettiness, but concluded it to be rather too fine and sentimental a +name (a fault inevitable by literary ladies in such attempts) for +sunburnt men to work under. I ventured to whisper "Utopia," which, +however, was unanimously scouted down, and the proposer very harshly +maltreated, as if he had intended a latent satire. Some were for +calling our institution "The Oasis," in view of its being the one +green spot in the moral sand-waste of the world; but others insisted +on a proviso for reconsidering the matter at a twelvemonths' end, +when a final decision might be had, whether to name it "The Oasis" or +"Sahara." So, at last, finding it impracticable to hammer out +anything better, we resolved that the spot should still be Blithedale, +as being of good augury enough. + +The evening wore on, and the outer solitude looked in upon us through +the windows, gloomy, wild, and vague, like another state of existence, +close beside the little sphere of warmth and light in which we were +the prattlers and bustlers of a moment. By and by the door was +opened by Silas Foster, with a cotton handkerchief about his head, +and a tallow candle in his hand. + +"Take my advice, brother farmers," said he, with a great, broad, +bottomless yawn, "and get to bed as soon as you can. I shall sound +the horn at daybreak; and we've got the cattle to fodder, and nine +cows to milk, and a dozen other things to do, before breakfast." + +Thus ended the first evening at Blithedale. I went shivering to my +fireless chamber, with the miserable consciousness (which had been +growing upon me for several hours past) that I had caught a +tremendous cold, and should probably awaken, at the blast of the horn, +a fit subject for a hospital. The night proved a feverish one. +During the greater part of it, I was in that vilest of states when a +fixed idea remains in the mind, like the nail in Sisera's brain, +while innumerable other ideas go and come, and flutter to and fro, +combining constant transition with intolerable sameness. Had I made +a record of that night's half-waking dreams, it is my belief that it +would have anticipated several of the chief incidents of this +narrative, including a dim shadow of its catastrophe. Starting up in +bed at length, I saw that the storm was past, and the moon was +shining on the snowy landscape, which looked like a lifeless copy of +the world in marble. + +From the bank of the distant river, which was shimmering in the +moonlight, came the black shadow of the only cloud in heaven, driven +swiftly by the wind, and passing over meadow and hillock, vanishing +amid tufts of leafless trees, but reappearing on the hither side, +until it swept across our doorstep. + +How cold an Arcadia was this! + + + +VI. COVERDALE'S SICK-CHAMBER + +The horn sounded at daybreak, as Silas Foster had forewarned us, +harsh, uproarious, inexorably drawn out, and as sleep-dispelling as +if this hard-hearted old yeoman had got hold of the trump of doom. + +On all sides I could hear the creaking of the bedsteads, as the +brethren of Blithedale started from slumber, and thrust themselves +into their habiliments, all awry, no doubt, in their haste to begin +the reformation of the world. Zenobia put her head into the entry, +and besought Silas Foster to cease his clamor, and to be kind enough +to leave an armful of firewood and a pail of water at her chamber +door. Of the whole household,--unless, indeed, it were Priscilla, +for whose habits, in this particular, I cannot vouch,--of all our +apostolic society, whose mission was to bless mankind, Hollingsworth, +I apprehend, was the only one who began the enterprise with prayer. +My sleeping-room being but thinly partitioned from his, the solemn +murmur of his voice made its way to my ears, compelling me to be an +auditor of his awful privacy with the Creator. It affected me with a +deep reverence for Hollingsworth, which no familiarity then existing, +or that afterwards grew more intimate between us,--no, nor my +subsequent perception of his own great errors,--ever quite effaced. +It is so rare, in these times, to meet with a man of prayerful habits +(except, of course, in the pulpit), that such an one is decidedly +marked out by the light of transfiguration, shed upon him in the +divine interview from which he passes into his daily life. + +As for me, I lay abed; and if I said my prayers, it was backward, +cursing my day as bitterly as patient Job himself. The truth was, +the hot-house warmth of a town residence, and the luxurious life in +which I indulged myself, had taken much of the pith out of my +physical system; and the wintry blast of the preceding day, together +with the general chill of our airy old farmhouse, had got fairly into +my heart and the marrow of my bones. In this predicament, I +seriously wished--selfish as it may appear--that the reformation of +society had been postponed about half a century, or, at all events, +to such a date as should have put my intermeddling with it entirely +out of the question. + +What, in the name of common-sense, had I to do with any better +society than I had always lived in? It had satisfied me well enough. +My pleasant bachelor-parlor, sunny and shadowy, curtained and +carpeted, with the bedchamber adjoining; my centre-table, strewn with +books and periodicals; my writing-desk with a half-finished poem, in +a stanza of my own contrivance; my morning lounge at the reading-room +or picture gallery; my + +noontide walk along the cheery pavement, with the suggestive +succession of human faces, and the brisk throb of human life in which +I shared; my dinner at the Albion, where I had a hundred dishes at +command, and could banquet as delicately as the wizard Michael Scott +when the Devil fed him from the king of France's kitchen; my evening +at the billiard club, the concert, the theatre, or at somebody's +party, if I pleased,--what could be better than all this? Was it +better to hoe, to mow, to toil and moil amidst the accumulations of a +barnyard; to be the chambermaid of two yoke of oxen and a dozen cows; +to eat salt beef, and earn it with the sweat of my brow, and thereby +take the tough morsel out of some wretch's mouth, into whose vocation +I had thrust myself? Above all, was it better to have a fever and +die blaspheming, as I was like to do? + +In this wretched plight, with a furnace in my heart and another in my +head, by the heat of which I was kept constantly at the boiling point, +yet shivering at the bare idea of extruding so much as a finger into +the icy atmosphere of the room, I kept my bed until breakfast-time, +when Hollingsworth knocked at the door, and entered. + +"Well, Coverdale," cried he, "you bid fair to make an admirable +farmer! Don't you mean to get up to-day?" + +"Neither to-day nor to-morrow," said I hopelessly. "I doubt if I +ever rise again!" + +"What is the matter now?" he asked. + +I told him my piteous case, and besought him to send me back to town +in a close carriage. + +"No, no!" said Hollingsworth with kindly seriousness. "If you are +really sick, we must take care of you." + +Accordingly he built a fire in my chamber, and, having little else to +do while the snow lay on the ground, established himself as my nurse. +A doctor was sent for, who, being homaeopathic, gave me as much +medicine, in the course of a fortnight's attendance, as would have +laid on the point of a needle. They fed me on water-gruel, and I +speedily became a skeleton above ground. But, after all, I have many +precious recollections connected with that fit of sickness. + +Hollingsworth's more than brotherly attendance gave me inexpressible +comfort. Most men--and certainly I could not always claim to be one +of the exceptions--have a natural indifference, if not an absolutely +hostile feeling, towards those whom disease, or weakness, or calamity +of any kind causes to falter and faint amid the rude jostle of our +selfish existence. The education of Christianity, it is true, the +sympathy of a like + +experience and the example of women, may soften and, possibly, +subvert this ugly characteristic of our sex; but it is originally +there, and has likewise its analogy in the practice of our brute +brethren, who hunt the sick or disabled member of the herd from among +them, as an enemy. It is for this reason that the stricken deer goes +apart, and the sick lion grimly withdraws himself into his den. +Except in love, or the attachments of kindred, or other very long and +habitual affection, we really have no tenderness. But there was +something of the woman moulded into the great, stalwart frame of +Hollingsworth; nor was he ashamed of it, as men often are of what is +best in them, nor seemed ever to know that there was such a soft +place in his heart. I knew it well, however, at that time, although +afterwards it came nigh to be forgotten. Methought there could not +be two such men alive as Hollingsworth. There never was any blaze of +a fireside that warmed and cheered me, in the down-sinkings and +shiverings of my spirit, so effectually as did the light out of those +eyes, which lay so deep and dark under his shaggy brows. + +Happy the man that has such a friend beside him when he comes to die! +and unless a friend like Hollingsworth be at hand,--as most probably +there will not,--he had better make up his mind to die alone. How +many men, I wonder, does one meet with in a lifetime, whom he would +choose for his deathbed companions! At the crisis of my fever I +besought Hollingsworth to let nobody else enter the room, but +continually to make me sensible of his own presence by a grasp of the +hand, a word, a prayer, if he thought good to utter it; and that then +he should be the witness how courageously I would encounter the worst. +It still impresses me as almost a matter of regret that I did not +die then, when I had tolerably made up my mind to it; for +Hollingsworth would have gone with me to the hither verge of life, +and have sent his friendly and hopeful accents far over on the other +side, while I should be treading the unknown path. Now, were I to +send for him, he would hardly come to my bedside, nor should I depart +the easier for his presence. + +"You are not going to die, this time," said he, gravely smiling. +"You know nothing about sickness, and think your case a great deal +more desperate than it is." + +"Death should take me while I am in the mood," replied I, with a +little of my customary levity. + +"Have you nothing to do in life," asked Hollingsworth, "that you +fancy yourself so ready to leave it?" + +"Nothing," answered I; "nothing that I know of, unless to make pretty +verses, and play a part, with Zenobia and the rest of the amateurs, +in our pastoral. It seems but an unsubstantial sort of business, as +viewed through a mist of fever. But, dear Hollingsworth, your own +vocation is evidently to be a priest, and to spend your days and +nights in helping your fellow creatures to draw peaceful dying +breaths." + +"And by which of my qualities," inquired he, "can you suppose me +fitted for this awful ministry?" + +"By your tenderness," I said. "It seems to me the reflection of +God's own love." + +"And you call me tender!" repeated Hollingsworth thoughtfully. "I +should rather say that the most marked trait in my character is an +inflexible severity of purpose. Mortal man has no right to be so +inflexible as it is my nature and necessity to be." + +"I do not believe it," I replied. + +But, in due time, I remembered what he said. + +Probably, as Hollingsworth suggested, my disorder was never so +serious as, in my ignorance of such matters, I was inclined to +consider it. After so much tragical preparation, it was positively +rather mortifying to find myself on the mending hand. + +All the other members of the Community showed me kindness, according +to the full measure of their capacity. Zenobia brought me my gruel +every day, made by her own hands (not very skilfully, if the truth +must be told), and, whenever I seemed inclined to converse, would sit +by my bedside, and talk with so much vivacity as to add several +gratuitous throbs to my pulse. Her poor little stories and tracts +never half did justice to her intellect. It was only the lack of a +fitter avenue that drove her to seek development in literature. She +was made (among a thousand other things that she might have been) for +a stump oratress. I recognized no severe culture in Zenobia; her +mind was full of weeds. It startled me sometimes, in my state of +moral as well as bodily faint-heartedness, to observe the hardihood +of her philosophy. She made no scruple of oversetting all human +institutions, and scattering them as with a breeze from her fan. A +female reformer, in her attacks upon society, has an instinctive +sense of where the life lies, and is inclined to aim directly at that +spot. Especially the relation between the sexes is naturally among +the earliest to attract her notice. + +Zenobia was truly a magnificent woman. The homely simplicity of her +dress could not conceal, nor scarcely diminish, the queenliness of +her presence. The image of her form and face should have been +multiplied all over the earth. It was wronging the rest of mankind +to retain her as the spectacle of only a few. The stage would have +been her proper sphere. She should have made it a point of duty, +moreover, to sit endlessly to painters and sculptors, and preferably +to the latter; because the cold decorum of the marble would consist +with the utmost scantiness of drapery, so that the eye might chastely +be gladdened with her material perfection in its entireness. I know +not well how to express that the native glow of coloring in her +cheeks, and even the flesh-warmth over her round arms, and what was +visible of her full bust,--in a word, her womanliness incarnated,-- +compelled me sometimes to close my eyes, as if it were not quite +the privilege of modesty to gaze at her. Illness and exhaustion, no +doubt, had made me morbidly sensitive. + +I noticed--and wondered how Zenobia contrived it--that she had always +a new flower in her hair. And still it was a hot-house flower,--an +outlandish flower,--a flower of the tropics, such as appeared to have +sprung passionately out of a soil the very weeds of which would be +fervid and spicy. Unlike as was the flower of each successive day to +the preceding one, it yet so assimilated its richness to the rich +beauty of the woman, that I thought it the only flower fit to be worn; +so fit, indeed, that Nature had evidently created this floral gem, +in a happy exuberance, for the one purpose of worthily adorning +Zenobia's head. It might be that my feverish fantasies clustered +themselves about this peculiarity, and caused it to look more +gorgeous and wonderful than if beheld with temperate eyes. In the +height of my illness, as I well recollect, I went so far as to +pronounce it preternatural. + +"Zenobia is an enchantress!" whispered I once to Hollingsworth. "She +is a sister of the Veiled Lady. That flower in her hair is a +talisman. If you were to snatch it away, she would vanish, or be +transformed into something else." + +"What does he say?" asked Zenobia. + +"Nothing that has an atom of sense in it," answered Hollingsworth. +"He is a little beside himself, I believe, and talks about your being +a witch, and of some magical property in the flower that you wear in +your hair." + +"It is an idea worthy of a feverish poet," said she, laughing rather +compassionately, and taking out the flower. "I scorn to owe anything +to magic. Here, Mr. Hollingsworth, you may keep the spell while it +has any virtue in it; but I cannot promise you not to appear with a +new one to-morrow. It is the one relic of my more brilliant, my +happier days!" + +The most curious part of the matter was that, long after my slight +delirium had passed away,--as long, indeed, as I continued to know +this remarkable woman,--her daily flower affected my imagination, +though more slightly, yet in very much the same way. The reason must +have been that, whether intentionally on her part or not, this +favorite ornament was actually a subtile expression of Zenobia's +character. + +One subject, about which--very impertinently, moreover--I perplexed +myself with a great many conjectures, was, whether Zenobia had ever +been married. The idea, it must be understood, was unauthorized by +any circumstance or suggestion that had made its way to my ears. So +young as I beheld her, and the freshest and rosiest woman of a +thousand, there was certainly no need of imputing to her a destiny +already accomplished; the probability was far greater that her coming +years had all life's richest gifts to bring. If the great event of a +woman's existence had been consummated, the world knew nothing of it, +although the world seemed to know Zenobia well. It was a ridiculous +piece of romance, undoubtedly, to imagine that this beautiful +personage, wealthy as she was, and holding a position that might +fairly enough be called distinguished, could have given herself away +so privately, but that some whisper and suspicion, and by degrees a +full understanding of the fact, would eventually be blown abroad. +But then, as I failed not to consider, her original home was at a +distance of many hundred miles. Rumors might fill the social +atmosphere, or might once have filled it, there, which would travel +but slowly, against the wind, towards our Northeastern metropolis, +and perhaps melt into thin air before reaching it. + +There was not--and I distinctly repeat it--the slightest foundation +in my knowledge for any surmise of the kind. But there is a species +of intuition,--either a spiritual lie or the subtile recognition of a +fact,--which comes to us in a reduced state of the corporeal system. +The soul gets the better of the body, after wasting illness, or when +a vegetable diet may have mingled too much ether in the blood. +Vapors then rise up to the brain, and take shapes that often image +falsehood, but sometimes truth. The spheres of our companions have, +at such periods, a vastly greater influence upon our own than when +robust health gives us a repellent and self-defensive energy. +Zenobia's sphere, I imagine, impressed itself powerfully on mine, and +transformed me, during this period of my weakness, into something +like a mesmerical clairvoyant. + +Then, also, as anybody could observe, the freedom of her deportment +(though, to some tastes, it might commend itself as the utmost +perfection of manner in a youthful widow or a blooming matron) was +not exactly maiden-like. What girl had ever laughed as Zenobia did? +What girl had ever spoken in her mellow tones? Her unconstrained and +inevitable manifestation, I said often to myself, was that of a woman +to whom wedlock had thrown wide the gates of mystery. Yet sometimes +I strove to be ashamed of these conjectures. I acknowledged it as a +masculine grossness--a sin of wicked interpretation, of which man is +often guilty towards the other sex--thus to mistake the sweet, +liberal, but womanly frankness of a noble and generous disposition. +Still, it was of no avail to reason with myself nor to upbraid myself. +Pertinaciously the thought, "Zenobia is a wife; Zenobia has lived +and loved! There is no folded petal, no latent dewdrop, in this +perfectly developed rose!"--irresistibly that thought drove out all +other conclusions, as often as my mind reverted to the subject. + +Zenobia was conscious of my observation, though not, I presume, of +the point to which it led me. + +"Mr. Coverdale," said she one day, as she saw me watching her, while +she arranged my gruel on the table, "I have been exposed to a great +deal of eye-shot in the few years of my mixing in the world, but +never, I think, to precisely such glances as you are in the habit of +favoring me with. I seem to interest you very much; and yet--or else +a woman's instinct is for once deceived--I cannot reckon you as an +admirer. What are you seeking to discover in me?" + +"The mystery of your life," answered I, surprised into the truth by +the unexpectedness of her attack. "And you will never tell me." + +She bent her head towards me, and let me look into her eyes, as if +challenging me to drop a plummet-line down into the depths of her +consciousness. + +"I see nothing now," said I, closing my own eyes, "unless it be the +face of a sprite laughing at me from the bottom of a deep well." + +A bachelor always feels himself defrauded, when he knows or suspects +that any woman of his acquaintance has given herself away. Otherwise, +the matter could have been no concern of mine. It was purely +speculative, for I should not, under any circumstances, have fallen +in love with Zenobia. The riddle made me so nervous, however, in my +sensitive condition of mind and body, that I most ungratefully began +to wish that she would let me alone. Then, too, her gruel was very +wretched stuff, with almost invariably the smell of pine smoke upon +it, like the evil taste that is said to mix itself up with a witch's +best concocted dainties. Why could not she have allowed one of the +other women to take the gruel in charge? Whatever else might be her +gifts, Nature certainly never intended Zenobia for a cook. Or, if so, +she should have meddled only with the richest and spiciest dishes, +and such as are to be tasted at banquets, between draughts of +intoxicating wine. + + + +VII. THE CONVALESCENT + +As soon as my incommodities allowed me to think of past occurrences, +I failed not to inquire what had become of the odd little guest whom +Hollingsworth had been the medium of introducing among us. It now +appeared that poor Priscilla had not so literally fallen out of the +clouds, as we were at first inclined to suppose. A letter, which +should have introduced her, had since been received from one of the +city missionaries, containing a certificate of character and an +allusion to circumstances which, in the writer's judgment, made it +especially desirable that she should find shelter in our Community. +There was a hint, not very intelligible, implying either that +Priscilla had recently escaped from some particular peril or +irksomeness of position, or else + +that she was still liable to this danger or difficulty, whatever it +might be. We should ill have deserved the reputation of a benevolent +fraternity, had we hesitated to entertain a petitioner in such need, +and so strongly recommended to our kindness; not to mention, moreover, +that the strange maiden had set herself diligently to work, and was +doing good service with her needle. But a slight mist of uncertainty +still floated about Priscilla, and kept her, as yet, from taking a +very decided place among creatures of flesh and blood. + +The mysterious attraction, which, from her first entrance on our +scene, she evinced for Zenobia, had lost nothing of its force. I +often heard her footsteps, soft and low, accompanying the light but +decided tread of the latter up the staircase, stealing along the +passage-way by her new friend's side, and pausing while Zenobia +entered my chamber. Occasionally Zenobia would be a little annoyed +by Priscilla's too close attendance. In an authoritative and not +very kindly tone, she would advise her to breathe the pleasant air in +a walk, or to go with her work into the barn, holding out half a +promise to come and sit on the hay with her, when at leisure. +Evidently, Priscilla found but scanty requital for her love. +Hollingsworth was likewise a great favorite with her. For several +minutes together sometimes, while my auditory nerves retained the +susceptibility of delicate health, I used to hear a low, pleasant +murmur ascending from the room below; and at last ascertained it to +be Priscilla's voice, babbling like a little brook to Hollingsworth. +She talked more largely and freely with him than with Zenobia, +towards whom, indeed, her feelings seemed not so much to be +confidence as involuntary affection. I should have thought all the +better of my own qualities had Priscilla marked me out for the third +place in her regards. But, though she appeared to like me tolerably +well, I could never flatter myself with being distinguished by her as +Hollingsworth and Zenobia were. + +One forenoon, during my convalescence, there came a gentle tap at my +chamber door. I immediately said, "Come in, Priscilla!" with an +acute sense of the applicant's identity. Nor was I deceived. It was +really Priscilla,--a pale, large-eyed little woman (for she had gone +far enough into her teens to be, at least, on the outer limit of +girlhood), but much less wan than at my previous view of her, and far +better conditioned both as to health and spirits. As I first saw her, +she had reminded me of plants that one sometimes observes doing +their best to vegetate among the bricks of an enclosed court, where +there is scanty soil and never any sunshine. At present, though with +no approach to bloom, there were indications that the girl had human +blood in her veins. + +Priscilla came softly to my bedside, and held out an article of +snow-white linen, very carefully and smoothly ironed. She did not +seem bashful, nor anywise embarrassed. My weakly condition, I +suppose, supplied a medium in which she could approach me. + +"Do not you need this?" asked she. "I have made it for you." It was +a nightcap! + +"My dear Priscilla," said I, smiling, "I never had on a nightcap in +my life! But perhaps it will be better for me to wear one, now that +I am a miserable invalid. How admirably you have done it! No, no; I +never can think of wearing such an exquisitely wrought nightcap as +this, unless it be in the daytime, when I sit up to receive company." + +"It is for use, not beauty," answered Priscilla. "I could have +embroidered it and made it much prettier, if I pleased." + +While holding up the nightcap and admiring the fine needlework, I +perceived that Priscilla had a sealed letter which she was waiting +for me to take. It had arrived from the village post-office that +morning. As I did not immediately offer to receive the letter, she +drew it back, and held it against her bosom, with both hands clasped +over it, in a way that had probably grown habitual to her. Now, on +turning my eyes from the nightcap to Priscilla, it forcibly struck me +that her air, though not her figure, and the expression of her face, +but not its features, had a resemblance to what I had often seen in a +friend of mine, one of the most gifted women of the age. I cannot +describe it. The points easiest to convey to the reader were a +certain curve of the shoulders and a partial closing of the eyes, +which seemed to look more penetratingly into my own eyes, through the +narrowed apertures, than if they had been open at full width. It was +a singular anomaly of likeness coexisting with perfect dissimilitude. + +"Will you give me the letter, Priscilla?" said I. + +She started, put the letter into my hand, and quite lost the look +that had drawn my notice. + +"Priscilla," I inquired, "did you ever see Miss Margaret Fuller?" + +"No," she answered. + +"Because," said I, "you reminded me of her just now,--and it happens, +strangely enough, that this very letter is from her." + +Priscilla, for whatever reason, looked very much discomposed. + +"I wish people would not fancy such odd things in me!" she said +rather petulantly. "How could I possibly make myself resemble this +lady merely by holding her letter in my hand?" + +"Certainly, Priscilla, it would puzzle me to explain it," I replied; +"nor do I suppose that the letter had anything to do with it. It was +just a coincidence, nothing more." + +She hastened out of the room, and this was the last that I saw of +Priscilla until I ceased to be an invalid. + +Being much alone during my recovery, I read interminably in Mr. +Emerson's Essays, "The Dial," Carlyle's works, George Sand's romances +(lent me by Zenobia), and other books which one or another of the +brethren or sisterhood had brought with them. Agreeing in little +else, most of these utterances were like the cry of some solitary +sentinel, whose station was on the outposts of the advance guard of +human progression; or sometimes the voice came sadly from among the +shattered ruins of the past, but yet had a hopeful echo in the future. +They were well adapted (better, at least, than any other +intellectual products, the volatile essence of which had heretofore +tinctured a printed page) to pilgrims like ourselves, whose present +bivouac was considerably further into the waste of chaos than any +mortal army of crusaders had ever marched before. Fourier's works, +also, in a series of horribly tedious volumes, attracted a good deal +of my attention, from the analogy which I could not but recognize +between his system and our own. There was far less resemblance, it +is true, than the world chose to imagine, inasmuch as the two +theories differed, as widely as the zenith from the nadir, in their +main principles. + +I talked about Fourier to Hollingsworth, and translated, for his +benefit, some of the passages that chiefly impressed me. + +"When, as a consequence of human improvement," said I, "the globe +shall arrive at its final perfection, the great ocean is to be +converted into a particular kind of lemonade, such as was fashionable +at Paris in Fourier's time. He calls it limonade a cedre. It is +positively a fact! Just imagine the city docks filled, every day, +with a flood tide of this delectable beverage!" + +"Why did not the Frenchman make punch of it at once?" asked +Hollingsworth. "The jack-tars would be delighted to go down in ships +and do business in such an element." + +I further proceeded to explain, as well as I modestly could, several +points of Fourier's system, illustrating them with here and there a +page + +or two, and asking Hollingsworth's opinion as to the expediency of +introducing these beautiful peculiarities into our own practice. + +"Let me hear no more of it!" cried he, in utter disgust. "I never +will forgive this fellow! He has committed the unpardonable sin; for +what more monstrous iniquity could the Devil himself contrive than to +choose the selfish principle,--the principle of all human wrong, the +very blackness of man's heart, the portion of ourselves which we +shudder at, and which it is the whole aim of spiritual discipline to +eradicate,--to choose it as the master workman of his system? To +seize upon and foster whatever vile, petty, sordid, filthy, bestial, +and abominable corruptions have cankered into our nature, to be the +efficient instruments of his infernal regeneration! And his +consummated Paradise, as he pictures it, would be worthy of the +agency which he counts upon for establishing it. The nauseous +villain!" + +"Nevertheless," remarked I, "in consideration of the promised +delights of his system,--so very proper, as they certainly are, to be +appreciated by Fourier's countrymen,--I cannot but wonder that +universal France did not adopt his theory at a moment's warning. But +is there not something very characteristic of his nation in Fourier's +manner of putting forth his views? He makes no claim to inspiration. +He has not persuaded himself--as Swedenborg did, and as any other +than a Frenchman would, with a mission of like importance to +communicate--that he speaks with + +authority from above. He promulgates his system, so far as I can +perceive, entirely on his own responsibility. He has searched out +and discovered the whole counsel of the Almighty in respect to +mankind, past, present, and for exactly seventy thousand years to +come, by the mere force and cunning of his individual intellect!" + +"Take the book out of my sight," said Hollingsworth with great +virulence of expression, "or, I tell you fairly, I shall fling it in +the fire! And as for Fourier, let him make a Paradise, if he can, of +Gehenna, where, as I conscientiously believe, he is floundering at +this moment!" + +"And bellowing, I suppose," said I,--not that I felt any ill-will +towards Fourier, but merely wanted to give the finishing touch to +Hollingsworth's image, "bellowing for the least drop of his beloved +limonade a cedre!" + +There is but little profit to be expected in attempting to argue with +a man who allows himself to declaim in this manner; so I dropt the +subject, and never took it up again. + +But had the system at which he was so enraged combined almost any +amount of human wisdom, spiritual insight, and imaginative beauty, I +question whether Hollingsworth's mind was in a fit condition to +receive it. I began to discern that he had come among us actuated by +no real sympathy with our feelings and our hopes, but chiefly because +we were estranging ourselves from the world, with which his lonely +and exclusive object in life had already put him at odds. +Hollingsworth must have been originally endowed with a great spirit +of benevolence, deep enough and warm enough to be the source of as +much disinterested good as Providence often allows a human being the +privilege of conferring upon his fellows. This native instinct yet +lived within him. I myself had profited by it, in my necessity. It +was seen, too, in his treatment of Priscilla. Such casual +circumstances as were here involved would quicken his divine power of +sympathy, and make him seem, while their influence lasted, the +tenderest man and the truest friend on earth. But by and by you +missed the tenderness of yesterday, and grew drearily conscious that +Hollingsworth had a closer friend than ever you could be; and this +friend was the cold, spectral monster which he had himself conjured +up, and on which he was wasting all the warmth of his heart, and of +which, at last,--as these men of a mighty purpose so invariably do,-- +he had grown to be the bond-slave. It was his philanthropic theory. + +This was a result exceedingly sad to contemplate, considering that it +had been mainly brought about by the very ardor and exuberance of his +philanthropy. Sad, indeed, but by no means unusual: he had taught +his benevolence to pour its warm tide exclusively through one channel; +so that there was nothing to spare for other great manifestations of +love to man, nor scarcely for the nutriment of individual attachments, +unless they could minister in some way to the terrible egotism which +he mistook for an angel of God. Had Hollingsworth's education been +more enlarged, he might not so inevitably have stumbled into this +pitfall. But this identical pursuit had educated him. He knew +absolutely nothing, except in a single direction, where he had +thought so energetically, and felt to such a depth, that no doubt the +entire reason and justice of the universe appeared to be concentrated +thitherward. + +It is my private opinion that, at this period of his life, +Hollingsworth was fast going mad; and, as with other crazy people +(among whom I include humorists of every degree), it required all the +constancy of friendship to restrain his associates from pronouncing +him an intolerable bore. Such prolonged fiddling upon one +string--such multiform presentation of one idea! His specific object +(of which he made the public more than sufficiently aware, through +the medium of lectures and pamphlets) was to obtain funds for the +construction of an edifice, with a sort of collegiate endowment. On +this foundation he purposed to devote himself and a few disciples to +the reform and mental culture of our criminal brethren. His +visionary edifice was Hollingsworth's one castle in the air; it was +the material type in which his philanthropic dream strove to embody +itself; and he made the scheme more definite, and caught hold of it +the more strongly, and kept his clutch the more pertinaciously, by +rendering it visible to the bodily eye. I have seen him, a hundred +times, with a pencil and sheet of paper, sketching the facade, the +side-view, or the rear of the structure, or planning the internal +arrangements, as lovingly as another man might plan those of the +projected home where he meant to be happy with his wife and children. +I have known him to begin a model of the building with little stones, +gathered at the brookside, whither we had gone to cool ourselves in +the sultry noon of haying-time. Unlike all other ghosts, his spirit +haunted an edifice, which, instead of being time-worn, and full of +storied love, and joy, and sorrow, had never yet come into existence. + +"Dear friend," said I once to Hollingsworth, before leaving my +sick-chamber," I heartily wish that I could make your schemes my +schemes, because it would be so great a happiness to find myself +treading the same path with you. But I am afraid there is not stuff +in me stern enough for a philanthropist,--or not in this peculiar +direction,--or, at all events, not solely in this. Can you bear with +me, if such should prove to be the case?" + +"I will at least wait awhile," answered Hollingsworth, gazing at me +sternly and gloomily. "But how can you be my life-long friend, +except you strive with me towards the great object of my life?" + +Heaven forgive me! A horrible suspicion crept into my heart, and +stung the very core of it as with the fangs of an adder. I wondered +whether it were possible that Hollingsworth could have watched by my +bedside, with all that devoted care, only for the ulterior purpose of +making me a proselyte to his views! + + + +VIII. A MODERN ARCADIA + +May-day--I forget whether by Zenobia’s sole decree, or by the +unanimous vote of our community--had been declared a movable festival. +It was deferred until the sun should have had a reasonable time to +clear away the snowdrifts along the lee of the stone walls, and bring +out a few of the readiest wild flowers. On the forenoon of the +substituted day, after admitting some of the balmy air into my +chamber, I decided that it was nonsense and effeminacy to keep myself +a prisoner any longer. So I descended to the sitting-room, and +finding nobody there, proceeded to the barn, whence I had already +heard Zenobia's voice, and along with it a girlish laugh which was +not so certainly recognizable. Arriving at the spot, it a little +surprised me to discover that these merry outbreaks came from +Priscilla. + +The two had been a-maying together. They had found anemones in +abundance, houstonias by the handful, some columbines, a few +long-stalked violets, and a quantity of white everlasting flowers, +and had filled up their basket with the delicate spray of shrubs and +trees. None were prettier than the maple twigs, the leaf of which +looks like a scarlet bud in May, and like a plate of vegetable gold +in October. Zenobia, who showed no conscience in such matters, had +also rifled a cherry-tree of one of its blossomed boughs, and, with +all this variety of sylvan ornament, had been decking out Priscilla. +Being done with a good deal of taste, it made her look more charming +than I should have thought possible, with my recollection of the wan, +frost-nipt girl, as heretofore described. Nevertheless, among those +fragrant blossoms, and conspicuously, too, had been stuck a weed of +evil odor and ugly aspect, which, as soon as I detected it, destroyed +the effect of all the rest. There was a gleam of latent +mischief--not to call it deviltry--in Zenobia's eye, which seemed to +indicate a slightly malicious purpose in the arrangement. + +As for herself, she scorned the rural buds and leaflets, and wore +nothing but her invariable flower of the tropics. + +"What do you think of Priscilla now, Mr. Coverdale?" asked she, +surveying her as a child does its doll. "Is not she worth a verse or +two?" + +"There is only one thing amiss," answered I. Zenobia laughed, and +flung the malignant weed away. + +"Yes; she deserves some verses now," said I, "and from a better poet +than myself. She is the very picture of the New England spring; +subdued in tint and rather cool, but with a capacity of sunshine, and +bringing us a few Alpine blossoms, as earnest of something richer, +though hardly more beautiful, hereafter. The best type of her is one +of those anemones." + +"What I find most singular in Priscilla, as her health improves," +observed Zenobia, "is her wildness. Such a quiet little body as she +seemed, one would not have expected that. Why, as we strolled the +woods together, I could hardly keep her from scrambling up the trees, +like a squirrel. She has never before known what it is to live in +the free air, and so it intoxicates her as if she were sipping wine. +And she thinks it such a paradise here, and all of us, particularly +Mr. Hollingsworth and myself, such angels! It is quite ridiculous, +and provokes one's malice almost, to see a creature so happy, +especially a feminine creature." + +"They are always happier than male creatures," said I. + +"You must correct that opinion, Mr. Coverdale," replied Zenobia +contemptuously, "or I shall think you lack the poetic insight. Did +you ever see a happy woman in your life? Of course, I do not mean a +girl, like Priscilla and a thousand others,--for they are all alike, +while on the sunny side of experience,--but a grown woman. How can +she be happy, after discovering that fate has assigned her but one +single event, which she must contrive to make the substance of her +whole life? A man has his choice of innumerable events." + +"A woman, I suppose," answered I, "by constant repetition of her one +event, may compensate for the lack of variety." + +"Indeed!" said Zenobia. + +While we were talking, Priscilla caught sight of Hollingsworth at a +distance, in a blue frock, and with a hoe over his shoulder, +returning from the field. She immediately set out to meet him, +running and skipping, with spirits as light as the breeze of the May +morning, but with limbs too little exercised to be quite responsive; +she clapped her hands, too, with great exuberance of gesture, as is +the custom of young girls when their electricity overcharges them. +But, all at once, midway to Hollingsworth, she paused, looked round +about her, towards the river, the road, the woods, and back towards +us, appearing to listen, as if she heard some one calling her name, +and knew not precisely in what direction. + +"Have you bewitched her?" I exclaimed. + +"It is no sorcery of mine," said Zenobia; "but I have seen the girl +do that identical thing once or twice before. Can you imagine what +is the matter with her?" + +"No; unless," said I, "she has the gift of hearing those 'airy +tongues that syllable men's names,' which Milton tells about." + +From whatever cause, Priscilla's animation seemed entirely to have +deserted her. She seated herself on a rock, and remained there until +Hollingsworth came up; and when he took her hand and led her back to +us, she rather resembled my original image of the wan and spiritless +Priscilla than the flowery May-queen of a few moments ago. These +sudden transformations, only to be accounted for by an extreme +nervous susceptibility, always continued to characterize the girl, +though with diminished frequency as her health progressively grew +more robust. + +I was now on my legs again. My fit of illness had been an avenue +between two existences; the low-arched and darksome doorway, through +which I crept out of a life of old conventionalisms, on my hands and +knees, as it were, and gained admittance into the freer region that +lay beyond. In this respect, it was like death. And, as with death, +too, it was good to have gone through it. No otherwise could I have +rid myself of a thousand follies, fripperies, prejudices, habits, and +other such worldly dust as inevitably settles upon the crowd along +the broad highway, giving them all one sordid aspect before noon-time, +however freshly they may have begun their pilgrimage in the dewy +morning. The very substance upon my bones had not been fit to live +with in any better, truer, or more energetic mode than that to which +I was accustomed. So it was taken off me and flung aside, like any +other worn-out or unseasonable garment; and, after shivering a little +while in my skeleton, I began to be clothed anew, and much more +satisfactorily than in my previous suit. In literal and physical +truth, I was quite another man. I had a lively sense of the +exultation with which the spirit will enter on the next stage of its +eternal progress after leaving the heavy burden of its mortality in +an early grave, with as little concern for what may become of it as +now affected me for the flesh which I had lost. + +Emerging into the genial sunshine, I half fancied that the labors of +the brotherhood had already realized some of Fourier's predictions. +Their enlightened culture of the soil, and the virtues with which +they sanctified their life, had begun to produce an effect upon the +material + +world and its climate. In my new enthusiasm, man looked strong and +stately,--and woman, oh, how beautiful!--and the earth a green garden, +blossoming with many-colored delights. Thus Nature, whose laws I +had broken in various artificial ways, comported herself towards me +as a strict but loving mother, who uses the rod upon her little boy +for his naughtiness, and then gives him a smile, a kiss, and some +pretty playthings to console the urchin for her severity. + +In the interval of my seclusion, there had been a number of recruits +to our little army of saints and martyrs. They were mostly +individuals who had gone through such an experience as to disgust +them with ordinary pursuits, but who were not yet so old, nor had +suffered so deeply, as to lose their faith in the better time to come. +On comparing their minds one with another they often discovered +that this idea of a Community had been growing up, in silent and +unknown sympathy, for years. Thoughtful, strongly lined faces were +among them; sombre brows, but eyes that did not require spectacles, +unless prematurely dimmed by the student's lamplight, and hair that +seldom showed a thread of silver. Age, wedded to the past, incrusted +over with a stony layer of habits, and retaining nothing fluid in its +possibilities, would have been absurdly out of place in an enterprise +like this. Youth, too, in its early dawn, was hardly more adapted to +our purpose; for it would behold the morning radiance of its own +spirit beaming over the very same spots of withered grass and barren +sand whence most of us had seen it vanish. We had very young people +with us, it is true,--downy lads, rosy girls in their first teens, +and children of all heights above one's knee; but these had chiefly +been sent hither for education, which it was one of the objects and +methods of our institution to supply. Then we had boarders, from +town and elsewhere, who lived with us in a familiar way, sympathized +more or less in our theories, and sometimes shared in our labors. + +On the whole, it was a society such as has seldom met together; nor, +perhaps, could it reasonably be expected to hold together long. +Persons of marked individuality--crooked sticks, as some of us might +be called--are not exactly the easiest to bind up into a fagot. But, +so long as our union should subsist, a man of intellect and feeling, +with a free nature in him, might have sought far and near without +finding so many points of attraction as would allure him hitherward. +We were of all creeds and opinions, and generally tolerant of all, on +every imaginable subject. Our bond, it seems to me, was not +affirmative, but negative. We had individually found one thing or +another to quarrel with in our past life, and were pretty well agreed +as to the inexpediency of lumbering along with the old system any +further. As to what should be substituted, there was much less +unanimity. We did not greatly care--at least, I never did--for the +written constitution under which our millennium had commenced. My +hope was, that, between theory and practice, a true and available +mode of life might be struck out; and that, even should we ultimately +fail, the months or years spent in the trial would not have been +wasted, either as regarded passing enjoyment, or the experience which +makes men wise. + +Arcadians though we were, our costume bore no resemblance to the +beribboned doublets, silk breeches and stockings, and slippers +fastened with artificial roses, that distinguish the pastoral people +of poetry and the stage. In outward show, I humbly conceive, we +looked rather like a gang of beggars, or banditti, than either a +company of honest laboring-men, or a conclave of philosophers. +Whatever might be our points of difference, we all of us seemed to +have come to Blithedale with the one thrifty and laudable idea of +wearing out our old clothes. Such garments as had an airing, +whenever we strode afield! Coats with high collars and with no +collars, broad-skirted or swallow-tailed, and with the waist at every +point between the hip and arm-pit; pantaloons of a dozen successive +epochs, and greatly defaced at the knees by the humiliations of the +wearer before his lady-love,--in short, we were a living epitome of +defunct fashions, and the very raggedest presentment of men who had +seen better days. It was gentility in tatters. Often retaining a +scholarlike or clerical air, you might have taken us for the denizens +of Grub Street, intent on getting a comfortable livelihood by +agricultural labor; or Coleridge's projected Pantisocracy in full +experiment; or Candide and his motley associates at work in their +cabbage garden; or anything else that was miserably out at elbows, +and most clumsily patched in the rear. We might have been sworn +comrades to Falstaff's ragged regiment. Little skill as we boasted +in other points of husbandry, every mother's son of us would have +served admirably to stick up for a scarecrow. And the worst of the +matter was, that the first energetic movement essential to one +downright stroke of real labor was sure to put a finish to these poor +habiliments. So we gradually flung them all aside, and took to +honest homespun and linsey-woolsey, as preferable, on the whole, to +the plan recommended, I think, by Virgil,--"Ara nudus; sere nudus, +"--which as Silas Foster remarked, when I translated the maxim, would +be apt to astonish the women-folks. + +After a reasonable training, the yeoman life throve well with us. +Our faces took the sunburn kindly; our chests gained in compass, and +our shoulders in breadth and squareness; our great brown fists looked +as if they had never been capable of kid gloves. The plough, the hoe, +the scythe, and the hay-fork grew familiar to our grasp. The oxen +responded to our voices. We could do almost as fair a day's work as +Silas Foster himself, sleep dreamlessly after it, and awake at +daybreak with only a little stiffness of the joints, which was +usually quite gone by breakfast-time. + +To be sure, our next neighbors pretended to be incredulous as to our +real proficiency in the business which we had taken in hand. They +told slanderous fables about our inability to yoke our own oxen, or +to drive them afield when yoked, or to release the poor brutes from +their conjugal bond at nightfall. They had the face to say, too, +that the cows laughed at our awkwardness at milking-time, and +invariably kicked over the pails; partly in consequence of our +putting the stool on the wrong side, and partly because, taking +offence at the whisking of their tails, we were in the habit of +holding these natural fly-flappers with one hand and milking with the +other. They further averred that we hoed up whole acres of Indian +corn and other crops, and drew the earth carefully about the weeds; +and that we raised five hundred tufts of burdock, mistaking them for +cabbages; and that by dint of unskilful planting few of our seeds +ever came up at all, or, if they did come up, it was stern-foremost; +and that we spent the better part of the month of June in reversing a +field of beans, which had thrust themselves out of the ground in this +unseemly way. They quoted it as nothing more than an ordinary +occurrence for one or other of us to crop off two or three fingers, +of a morning, by our clumsy use of the hay-cutter. Finally, and as +an ultimate catastrophe, these mendacious rogues circulated a report +that we communitarians were exterminated, to the last man, by +severing ourselves asunder with the sweep of our own scythes! and +that the world had lost nothing by this little accident. + +But this was pure envy and malice on the part of the neighboring +farmers. The peril of our new way of life was not lest we should +fail in becoming practical agriculturists, but that we should +probably cease to be anything else. While our enterprise lay all in +theory, we had pleased ourselves with delectable visions of the +spiritualization of labor. It was to be our form of prayer and +ceremonial of worship. Each stroke of the hoe was to uncover some +aromatic root of wisdom, heretofore hidden from the sun. Pausing in +the field, to let the wind exhale the moisture from our foreheads, we +were to look upward, and catch glimpses into the far-off soul of +truth. In this point of view, matters did not turn out quite so well +as we anticipated. It is very true that, sometimes, gazing casually +around me, out of the midst of my toil, I used to discern a richer +picturesqueness in the visible scene of earth and sky. There was, at +such moments, a novelty, an unwonted aspect, on the face of Nature, +as if she had been taken by surprise and seen at unawares, with no +opportunity to put off her real look, and assume the mask with which +she mysteriously hides herself from mortals. But this was all. The +clods of earth, which we so constantly belabored and turned over and +over, were never etherealized into thought. Our thoughts, on the +contrary, were fast becoming cloddish. Our labor symbolized nothing, +and left us mentally sluggish in the dusk of the evening. +Intellectual activity is incompatible with any large amount of bodily +exercise. The yeoman and the scholar--the yeoman and the man of +finest moral culture, though not the man of sturdiest sense and +integrity--are two distinct individuals, and can never be melted or +welded into one substance. + +Zenobia soon saw this truth, and gibed me about it, one evening, as +Hollingsworth and I lay on the grass, after a hard day's work. + +"I am afraid you did not make a song today, while loading the +hay-cart," said she, "as Burns did, when he was reaping barley." + +"Burns never made a song in haying-time," I answered very positively. +"He was no poet while a farmer, and no farmer while a poet." + +"And on the whole, which of the two characters do you like best?" +asked Zenobia. "For I have an idea that you cannot combine them any +better than Burns did. Ah, I see, in my mind's eye, what sort of an +individual you are to be, two or three years hence. Grim Silas +Foster is your prototype, with his palm of sole-leather, and his +joints of rusty iron (which all through summer keep the stiffness of +what he calls his winter's rheumatize), and his brain of--I don't +know what his brain is made of, unless it be a Savoy cabbage; but +yours may be cauliflower, as a rather more delicate variety. Your +physical man will be transmuted into salt beef and fried pork, at the +rate, I should imagine, of a pound and a half a day; that being about +the average which we find necessary in the kitchen. You will make +your toilet for the day (still like this delightful Silas Foster) by +rinsing your fingers and the front part of your face in a little tin +pan of water at the doorstep, and teasing your hair with a wooden +pocket-comb before a seven-by-nine-inch looking-glass. Your only +pastime will be to smoke some very vile tobacco in the black stump of +a pipe." + +"Pray, spare me!" cried I. "But the pipe is not Silas's only mode of +solacing himself with the weed." + +"Your literature," continued Zenobia, apparently delighted with her +description, "will be the 'Farmer's Almanac;' for I observe our +friend Foster never gets so far as the newspaper. When you happen to +sit down, at odd moments, you will fall asleep, and make nasal +proclamation of the fact, as he does; and invariably you must be +jogged out of a nap, after supper, by the future Mrs. Coverdale, and +persuaded to go regularly to bed. And on Sundays, when you put on a +blue coat with brass buttons, you will think of nothing else to do +but to go and lounge over the stone walls and rail fences, and stare +at the corn growing. And you will look with a knowing eye at oxen, +and will have a tendency to clamber over into pigsties, and feel of +the hogs, and give a guess how much they will weigh after you shall +have stuck and dressed them. Already I have noticed you begin to +speak through your nose, and with a drawl. Pray, if you really did +make any poetry to-day, let us hear it in that kind of utterance!" + +"Coverdale has given up making verses now," said Hollingsworth, who +never had the slightest appreciation of my poetry. "Just think of +him penning a sonnet with a fist like that! There is at least this +good in a life of toil, that it takes the nonsense and fancy-work out +of a man, and leaves nothing but what truly belongs to him. If a +farmer can make poetry at the plough-tail, it must be because his +nature insists on it; and if that be the case, let him make it, in +Heaven's name!" + +"And how is it with you?" asked Zenobia, in a different voice; for +she never laughed at Hollingsworth, as she often did at me. "You, I +think, cannot have ceased to live a life of thought and feeling." + +"I have always been in earnest," answered Hollingsworth. "I have +hammered thought out of iron, after heating the iron in my heart! It +matters little what my outward toil may be. Were I a slave, at the +bottom of a mine, I should keep the same purpose, the same faith in +its ultimate accomplishment, that I do now. Miles Coverdale is not +in earnest, either as a poet or a laborer." + +"You give me hard measure, Hollingsworth," said I, a little hurt. "I +have kept pace with you in the field; and my bones feel as if I had +been in earnest, whatever may be the case with my brain!" + +"I cannot conceive," observed Zenobia with great emphasis,--and, no +doubt, she spoke fairly the feeling of the moment,--"I cannot +conceive of being so continually as Mr. Coverdale is within the +sphere of a strong and noble nature, without being strengthened and +ennobled by its influence!" + +This amiable remark of the fair Zenobia confirmed me in what I had +already begun to suspect, that Hollingsworth, like many other +illustrious prophets, reformers, and philanthropists, was likely to +make at least two proselytes among the women to one among the men. +Zenobia and Priscilla! These, I believe (unless my unworthy self +might be reckoned for a third), were the only disciples of his +mission; and I spent a great deal of time, uselessly, in trying to +conjecture what Hollingsworth meant to do with them--and they with +him! + + + +IX. HOLLINGSWORTH, ZENOBIA, PRISCILLA + +It is not, I apprehend, a healthy kind of mental occupation to devote +ourselves too exclusively to the study of individual men and women. +If the person under examination be one's self, the result is pretty +certain to be diseased action of the heart, almost before we can +snatch a second glance. Or if we take the freedom to put a friend +under our microscope, we thereby insulate him from many of his true +relations, magnify his peculiarities, inevitably tear him into parts, +and of course patch him very clumsily together again. What wonder, +then, should we be frightened by the aspect of a monster, which, +after all,--though we can point to every feature of his deformity in +the real personage,--may be said to have been created mainly by +ourselves. + +Thus, as my conscience has often whispered me, I did Hollingsworth a +great wrong by prying into his character; and am perhaps doing him as +great a one, at this moment, by putting faith in the discoveries +which I seemed to make. But I could not help it. Had I loved him +less, I might have used him better. He and Zenobia and +Priscilla--both for their own sakes and as connected with him--were +separated from the rest of the Community, to my imagination, and +stood forth as the indices of a problem which it was my business to +solve. Other associates had a portion of my time; other matters +amused me; passing occurrences carried me along with them, while they +lasted. But here was the vortex of my meditations, around which they +revolved, and whitherward they too continually tended. In the midst +of cheerful society, I had often a feeling of loneliness. For it was +impossible not to be sensible that, while these three characters +figured so largely on my private theatre, I--though probably reckoned +as a friend by all--was at best but a secondary or tertiary personage +with either of them. + +I loved Hollingsworth, as has already been enough expressed. But it +impressed me, more and more, that there was a stern and dreadful +peculiarity in this man, such as could not prove otherwise than +pernicious to the happiness of those who should be drawn into too +intimate a connection with him. He was not altogether human. There +was something else in Hollingsworth besides flesh and blood, and +sympathies and affections and celestial spirit. + +This is always true of those men who have surrendered themselves to +an overruling purpose. It does not so much impel them from without, +nor even operate as a motive power within, but grows incorporate with +all that they think and feel, and finally converts them into little +else save that one principle. When such begins to be the predicament, +it is not cowardice, but wisdom, to avoid these victims. They have +no heart, no sympathy, no reason, no conscience. They will keep no +friend, unless he make himself the mirror of their purpose; they will +smite and slay you, and trample your dead corpse under foot, all the +more readily, if you take the first step with them, and cannot take +the second, and the third, and every other step of their terribly +strait path. They have an idol to which they consecrate themselves +high-priest, and deem it holy work to offer sacrifices of whatever is +most precious; and never once seem to suspect--so cunning has the +Devil been with them--that this false deity, in whose iron features, +immitigable to all the rest of mankind, they see only benignity and +love, is but a spectrum of the very priest himself, projected upon +the surrounding darkness. And the higher and purer the original +object, and the more unselfishly it may have been taken up, the +slighter is the probability that they can be led to recognize the +process by which godlike benevolence has been debased into +all-devouring egotism. + +Of course I am perfectly aware that the above statement is +exaggerated, in the attempt to make it adequate. Professed +philanthropists have gone far; but no originally good man, I presume, +ever went quite so far as this. Let the reader abate whatever he +deems fit. The paragraph may remain, however, both for its truth and +its exaggeration, as strongly expressive of the tendencies which were +really operative in Hollingsworth, and as exemplifying the kind of +error into which my mode of observation was calculated to lead me. +The issue was, that in solitude I often shuddered at my friend. In +my recollection of his dark and impressive countenance, the features +grew more sternly prominent than the reality, duskier in their depth +and shadow, and more lurid in their light; the frown, that had merely +flitted across his brow, seemed to have contorted it with an +adamantine wrinkle. On meeting him again, I was often filled with +remorse, when his deep eyes beamed kindly upon me, as with the glow +of a household fire that was burning in a cave. "He is a man after +all," thought I; "his Maker's own truest image, a philanthropic man!-- +not that steel engine of the Devil's contrivance, a philanthropist!" +But in my wood-walks, and in my silent chamber, the dark face +frowned at me again. + +When a young girl comes within the sphere of such a man, she is as +perilously situated as the maiden whom, in the old classical myths, +the people used to expose to a dragon. If I had any duty whatever, +in reference to Hollingsworth, it was to endeavor to save Priscilla +from that kind of personal worship which her sex is generally prone +to lavish upon saints and heroes. It often requires but one smile +out of the hero's eyes into the girl's or woman's heart, to transform +this devotion, from a sentiment of the highest approval and +confidence, into passionate love. Now, Hollingsworth smiled much +upon Priscilla,--more than upon any other person. If she thought him +beautiful, it was no wonder. I often thought him so, with the +expression of tender human care and gentlest sympathy which she alone +seemed to have power to call out upon his features. Zenobia, I +suspect, would have given her eyes, bright as they were, for such a +look; it was the least that our poor Priscilla could do, to give her +heart for a great many of them. There was the more danger of this, +inasmuch as the footing on which we all associated at Blithedale was +widely different from that of conventional society. While inclining +us to the soft affections of the golden age, it seemed to authorize +any individual, of either sex, to fall in love with any other, +regardless of what would elsewhere be judged suitable and prudent. +Accordingly the tender passion was very rife among us, in various +degrees of mildness or virulence, but mostly passing away with the +state of things that had given it origin. This was all well enough; +but, for a girl like Priscilla and a woman like Zenobia to jostle one +another in their love of a man like Hollingsworth, was likely to be +no child's play. + +Had I been as cold-hearted as I sometimes thought myself, nothing +would have interested me more than to witness the play of passions +that must thus have been evolved. But, in honest truth, I would +really have gone far to save Priscilla, at least, from the +catastrophe in which such a drama would be apt to terminate. + +Priscilla had now grown to be a very pretty girl, and still kept +budding and blossoming, and daily putting on some new charm, which +you no sooner became sensible of than you thought it worth all that +she had previously possessed. So unformed, vague, and without +substance, as she had come to us, it seemed as if we could see Nature +shaping out a woman before our very eyes, and yet had only a more +reverential sense of the mystery of a woman's soul and frame. +Yesterday, her cheek was pale, to-day, it had a bloom. Priscilla's +smile, like a baby's first one, was a wondrous novelty. Her +imperfections and shortcomings affected me with a kind of playful +pathos, which was as absolutely bewitching a sensation as ever I +experienced. After she had been a month or two at Blithedale, her +animal spirits waxed high, and kept her pretty constantly in a state +of bubble and ferment, impelling her to far more bodily activity than +she had yet strength to endure. She was very fond of playing with +the other girls out of doors. There is hardly another sight in the +world so pretty as that of a company of young girls, almost women +grown, at play, and so giving themselves up to their airy impulse +that their tiptoes barely touch the ground. + +Girls are incomparably wilder and more effervescent than boys, more +untamable and regardless of rule and limit, with an ever-shifting +variety, breaking continually into new modes of fun, yet with a +harmonious propriety through all. Their steps, their voices, appear +free as the wind, but keep consonance with a strain of music +inaudible to us. Young men and boys, on the other hand, play, +according to recognized law, old, traditionary games, permitting no +caprioles of fancy, but with scope enough for the outbreak of savage +instincts. For, young or old, in play or in earnest, man is prone to +be a brute. + +Especially is it delightful to see a vigorous young girl run a race, +with her head thrown back, her limbs moving more friskily than they +need, and an air between that of a bird and a young colt. But +Priscilla's peculiar charm, in a foot-race, was the weakness and +irregularity with which she ran. Growing up without exercise, except +to her poor little fingers, she had never yet acquired the perfect +use of her legs. Setting buoyantly forth, therefore, as if no rival +less swift than Atalanta could compete with her, she ran falteringly, +and often tumbled on the grass. Such an incident--though it seems +too slight to think of--was a thing to laugh at, but which brought +the water into one's eyes, and lingered in the memory after far +greater joys and sorrows were wept out of it, as antiquated trash. +Priscilla's life, as I beheld it, was full of trifles that affected +me in just this way. + +When she had come to be quite at home among us, I used to fancy that +Priscilla played more pranks, and perpetrated more mischief, than any +other girl in the Community. For example, I once heard Silas Foster, +in a very gruff voice, threatening to rivet three horseshoes round +Priscilla's neck and chain her to a post, because she, with some +other young people, had clambered upon a load of hay, and caused it +to slide off the cart. How she made her peace I never knew; but very +soon afterwards I saw old Silas, with his brawny hands round +Priscilla's waist, swinging her to and fro, and finally depositing +her on one of the oxen, to take her first lessons in riding. She met +with terrible mishaps in her efforts to milk a cow; she let the +poultry into the garden; she generally spoilt whatever part of the +dinner she took in charge; she broke crockery; she dropt our biggest +water pitcher into the well; and--except with her needle, and those +little wooden instruments for purse-making--was as unserviceable a +member of society as any young lady in the land. There was no other +sort of efficiency about her. Yet everybody was kind to Priscilla; +everybody loved her and laughed at her to her face, and did not laugh +behind her back; everybody would have given her half of his last +crust, or the bigger share of his plum-cake. These were pretty +certain indications that we were all conscious of a pleasant weakness +in the girl, and considered her not quite able to look after her own +interests or fight her battle with the world. And +Hollingsworth--perhaps because he had been the means of introducing +Priscilla to her new abode--appeared to recognize her as his own +especial charge. + +Her simple, careless, childish flow of spirits often made me sad. +She seemed to me like a butterfly at play in a flickering bit of +sunshine, and mistaking it for a broad and eternal summer. We +sometimes hold mirth to a stricter accountability than sorrow; it +must show good cause, or the echo of its laughter comes back drearily. +Priscilla's gayety, moreover, was of a nature that showed me how +delicate an instrument she was, and what fragile harp-strings were +her nerves. As they made sweet music at the airiest touch, it would +require but a stronger one to burst them all asunder. Absurd as it +might be, I tried to reason with her, and persuade her not to be so +joyous, thinking that, if she would draw less lavishly upon her fund +of happiness, it would last the longer. I remember doing so, one +summer evening, when we tired laborers sat looking on, like +Goldsmith's old folks under the village thorn-tree, while the young +people were at their sports. + +"What is the use or sense of being so very gay?" I said to Priscilla, +while she was taking breath, after a great frolic. "I love to see a +sufficient cause for everything, and I can see none for this. Pray +tell me, now, what kind of a world you imagine this to be, which you +are so merry in." + +"I never think about it at all," answered Priscilla, laughing. "But +this I am sure of, that it is a world where everybody is kind to me, +and where I love everybody. My heart keeps dancing within me, and +all the foolish things which you see me do are only the motions of my +heart. How can I be dismal, if my heart will not let me?" + +"Have you nothing dismal to remember?" I suggested. "If not, then, +indeed, you are very fortunate!" + +"Ah!" said Priscilla slowly. + +And then came that unintelligible gesture, when she seemed to be +listening to a distant voice. + +"For my part," I continued, beneficently seeking to overshadow her +with my own sombre humor, "my past life has been a tiresome one +enough; yet I would rather look backward ten times than forward once. +For, little as we know of our life to come, we may be very sure, for +one thing, that the good we aim at will not be attained. People +never do get just the good they seek. If it come at all, it is +something else, which they never dreamed of, and did not particularly +want. Then, again, we may rest certain that our friends of to-day +will not be our friends of a few years hence; but, if we keep one of +them, it will be at the expense of the others; and most probably we +shall keep none. To be sure, there are more to be had; but who cares +about making a new set of friends, even should they be better than +those around us?" + +"Not I!" said Priscilla. "I will live and die with these!" + +"Well; but let the future go," resumed I. "As for the present moment, +if we could look into the hearts where we wish to be most valued, +what should you expect to see? One's own likeness, in the innermost, +holiest niche? Ah! I don't know! It may not be there at all. It +may be a dusty image, thrust aside into a corner, and by and by to be +flung out of doors, where any foot may trample upon it. If not +to-day, then to-morrow! And so, Priscilla, I do not see much wisdom +in being so very merry in this kind of a world." + +It had taken me nearly seven years of worldly life to hive up the +bitter honey which I here offered to Priscilla. And she rejected it! + +"I don't believe one word of what you say!" she replied, laughing +anew. "You made me sad, for a minute, by talking about the past; but +the past never comes back again. Do we dream the same dream twice? +There is nothing else that I am afraid of." + +So away she ran, and fell down on the green grass, as it was often +her luck to do, but got up again, without any harm. + +"Priscilla, Priscilla!" cried Hollingsworth, who was sitting on the +doorstep; "you had better not run any more to-night. You will weary +yourself too much. And do not sit down out of doors, for there is a +heavy dew beginning to fall." + +At his first word, she went and sat down under the porch, at +Hollingsworth's feet, entirely contented and happy. What charm was +there in his rude massiveness that so attracted and soothed this +shadow-like girl? It appeared to me, who have always been curious in +such matters, that Priscilla's vague and seemingly causeless flow of +felicitous feeling was that with which love blesses inexperienced +hearts, before they begin to suspect what is going on within them. +It transports them to the seventh heaven; and if you ask what brought +them thither, they neither can tell nor care to learn, but cherish an +ecstatic faith that there they shall abide forever. + +Zenobia was in the doorway, not far from Hollingsworth. She gazed at +Priscilla in a very singular way. Indeed, it was a sight worth +gazing at, and a beautiful sight, too, as the fair girl sat at the +feet of that dark, powerful figure. Her air, while perfectly modest, +delicate, and virgin-like, denoted her as swayed by Hollingsworth, +attracted to him, and unconsciously seeking to rest upon his strength. +I could not turn away my own eyes, but hoped that nobody, save +Zenobia and myself, was witnessing this picture. It is before me now, +with the evening twilight a little deepened by the dusk of memory. + +"Come hither, Priscilla," said Zenobia. "I have something to say to +you." + +She spoke in little more than a whisper. But it is strange how +expressive of moods a whisper may often be. Priscilla felt at once +that something had gone wrong. + +"Are you angry with me?" she asked, rising slowly, and standing +before Zenobia in a drooping attitude. "What have I done? I hope +you are not angry!" + +"No, no, Priscilla!" said Hollingsworth, smiling. "I will answer for +it, she is not. You are the one little person in the world with whom +nobody can be angry!" + +"Angry with you, child? What a silly idea!" exclaimed Zenobia, +laughing. "No, indeed! But, my dear Priscilla, you are getting to +be so very pretty that you absolutely need a duenna; and, as I am +older than you, and have had my own little experience of life, and +think myself exceedingly sage, I intend to fill the place of a maiden +aunt. Every day, I shall give you a lecture, a quarter of an hour in +length, on the morals, manners, and proprieties of social life. When +our pastoral shall be quite played out, Priscilla, my worldly wisdom +may stand you in good stead." + +"I am afraid you are angry with me!" repeated Priscilla sadly; for, +while she seemed as impressible as wax, the girl often showed a +persistency in her own ideas as stubborn as it was gentle. + +"Dear me, what can I say to the child!" cried Zenobia in a tone of +humorous vexation. "Well, well; since you insist on my being angry, +come to my room this moment, and let me beat you!" + +Zenobia bade Hollingsworth good-night very sweetly, and nodded to me +with a smile. But, just as she turned aside with Priscilla into the +dimness of the porch, I caught another glance at her countenance. It +would have made the fortune of a tragic actress, could she have +borrowed it for the moment when she fumbles in her bosom for the +concealed dagger, or the exceedingly sharp bodkin, or mingles the +ratsbane in her lover's bowl of wine or her rival's cup of tea. Not +that I in the least anticipated any such catastrophe,--it being a +remarkable truth that custom has in no one point a greater sway than +over our modes of wreaking our wild passions. And besides, had we +been in Italy, instead of New England, it was hardly yet a crisis for +the dagger or the bowl. + +It often amazed me, however, that Hollingsworth should show himself +so recklessly tender towards Priscilla, and never once seem to think +of the effect which it might have upon her heart. But the man, as I +have endeavored to explain, was thrown completely off his moral +balance, and quite bewildered as to his personal relations, by his +great excrescence of a philanthropic scheme. I used to see, or fancy, +indications that he was not altogether obtuse to Zenobia's influence +as a woman. No doubt, however, he had a still more exquisite +enjoyment of Priscilla's silent sympathy with his purposes, so +unalloyed with criticism, and therefore more grateful than any +intellectual approbation, which always involves a possible reserve of +latent censure. A man--poet, prophet, or whatever he may be--readily +persuades himself of his right to all the worship that is voluntarily +tendered. In requital of so rich benefits as he was to confer upon +mankind, it would have been hard to deny Hollingsworth the simple +solace of a young girl's heart, which he held in his hand, and +smelled too, like a rosebud. But what if, while pressing out its +fragrance, he should crush the tender rosebud in his grasp! + +As for Zenobia, I saw no occasion to give myself any trouble. With +her native strength, and her experience of the world, she could not +be supposed to need any help of mine. Nevertheless, I was really +generous enough to feel some little interest likewise for Zenobia. +With all her faults (which might have been a great many besides the +abundance that I knew of), she possessed noble traits, and a heart +which must, at least, have been valuable while new. And she seemed +ready to fling it away as uncalculatingly as Priscilla herself. I +could not but suspect that, if merely at play with Hollingsworth, she +was sporting with a power which she did not fully estimate. Or if in +earnest, it might chance, between Zenobia's passionate force and his +dark, self-delusive egotism, to turn out such earnest as would +develop itself in some sufficiently tragic catastrophe, though the +dagger and the bowl should go for nothing in it. + +Meantime, the gossip of the Community set them down as a pair of +lovers. They took walks together, and were not seldom encountered in +the wood-paths: Hollingsworth deeply discoursing, in tones solemn and +sternly pathetic; Zenobia, with a rich glow on her cheeks, and her +eyes softened from their ordinary brightness, looked so beautiful, +that had her companion been ten times a philanthropist, it seemed +impossible but that one glance should melt him back into a man. +Oftener than anywhere else, they went to a certain point on the slope +of a pasture, commanding nearly the whole of our own domain, besides +a view of the river, and an airy prospect of many distant hills. The +bond of our Community was such, that the members had the privilege of +building cottages for their own residence within our precincts, thus +laying a hearthstone and fencing in a home private and peculiar to +all desirable extent, while yet the inhabitants should continue to +share the advantages of an associated life. It was inferred that +Hollingsworth and Zenobia intended to rear their dwelling on this +favorite spot. + +I mentioned those rumors to Hollingsworth in a playful way. + +"Had you consulted me," I went on to observe, "I should have +recommended a site farther to the left, just a little withdrawn into +the wood, with two or three peeps at the prospect among the trees. +You will be in the shady vale of years long before you can raise any +better kind of shade around your cottage, if you build it on this +bare slope." + +"But I offer my edifice as a spectacle to the world," said +Hollingsworth, "that it may take example and build many another like +it. Therefore, I mean to set it on the open hillside." + +Twist these words how I might, they offered no very satisfactory +import. It seemed hardly probable that Hollingsworth should care +about educating the public taste in the department of cottage +architecture, desirable as such improvement certainly was. + + + +X. A VISITOR FROM TOWN + +Hollingsworth and I--we had been hoeing potatoes, that forenoon, +while the rest of the fraternity were engaged in a distant quarter of +the farm--sat under a clump of maples, eating our eleven o'clock +lunch, when we saw a stranger approaching along the edge of the field. +He had admitted himself from the roadside through a turnstile, and +seemed to have a purpose of speaking with us. + +And, by the bye, we were favored with many visits at Blithedale, +especially from people who sympathized with our theories, and perhaps +held themselves ready to unite in our actual experiment as soon as +there should appear a reliable promise of its success. It was rather +ludicrous, indeed (to me, at least, whose enthusiasm had insensibly +been exhaled together with the perspiration of many a hard day's +toil), it was absolutely funny, therefore, to observe what a glory +was shed about our life and labors, in the imaginations of these +longing proselytes. In their view, we were as poetical as Arcadians, +besides being as practical as the hardest-fisted husbandmen in +Massachusetts. We did not, it is true, spend much time in piping to +our sheep, or warbling our innocent loves to the sisterhood. But +they gave us credit for imbuing the ordinary rustic occupations with +a kind of religious poetry, insomuch that our very cow-yards and +pig-sties were as delightfully fragrant as a flower garden. Nothing +used to please me more than to see one of these lay enthusiasts +snatch up a hoe, as they were very prone to do, and set to work with +a vigor that perhaps carried him through about a dozen ill-directed +strokes. Men are wonderfully soon satisfied, in this day of shameful +bodily enervation, when, from one end of life to the other, such +multitudes never taste the sweet weariness that follows accustomed +toil. I seldom saw the new enthusiasm that did not grow as flimsy +and flaccid as the proselyte's moistened shirt-collar, with a quarter +of an hour's active labor under a July sun. + +But the person now at hand had not at all the air of one of these +amiable visionaries. He was an elderly man, dressed rather shabbily, +yet decently enough, in a gray frock-coat, faded towards a brown hue, +and wore a broad-brimmed white hat, of the fashion of several years +gone by. His hair was perfect silver, without a dark thread in the +whole of it; his nose, though it had a scarlet tip, by no means +indicated the jollity of which a red nose is the generally admitted +symbol. He was a subdued, undemonstrative old man, who would +doubtless drink a glass of liquor, now and then, and probably more +than was good for him,--not, however, with a purpose of undue +exhilaration, but in the hope of bringing his spirits up to the +ordinary level of the world's cheerfulness. Drawing nearer, there +was a shy look about him, as if he were ashamed of his poverty, or, +at any rate, for some reason or other, would rather have us glance at +him sidelong than take a full front view. He had a queer appearance +of hiding himself behind the patch on his left eye. + +"I know this old gentleman," said I to Hollingsworth, as we sat +observing him; "that is, I have met him a hundred times in town, and +have often amused my fancy with wondering what he was before he came +to be what he is. He haunts restaurants and such places, and has an +odd way of lurking in corners or getting behind a door whenever +practicable, and holding out his hand with some little article in it +which he wishes you to buy. The eye of the world seems to trouble +him, although he necessarily lives so much in it. I never expected +to see him in an open field." + +"Have you learned anything of his history?" asked Hollingsworth. + +"Not a circumstance," I answered; "but there must be something +curious in it. I take him to be a harmless sort of a person, and a +tolerably honest one; but his manners, being so furtive, remind me of +those of a rat,--a rat without the mischief, the fierce eye, the +teeth to bite with, or the desire to bite. See, now! He means to +skulk along that fringe of bushes, and approach us on the other side +of our clump of maples." + +We soon heard the old man's velvet tread on the grass, indicating +that he had arrived within a few feet of where we Sat. + +"Good-morning, Mr. Moodie," said Hollingsworth, addressing the +stranger as an acquaintance; "you must have had a hot and tiresome +walk from the city. Sit down, and take a morsel of our bread and +cheese." + +The visitor made a grateful little murmur of acquiescence, and sat +down in a spot somewhat removed; so that, glancing round, I could see +his gray pantaloons and dusty shoes, while his upper part was mostly +hidden behind the shrubbery. Nor did he come forth from this +retirement during the whole of the interview that followed. We +handed him such food as we had, together with a brown jug of molasses +and water (would that it had been brandy, or some thing better, for +the sake of his chill old heart!), like priests offering dainty +sacrifice to an enshrined and invisible idol. I have no idea that he +really lacked sustenance; but it was quite touching, nevertheless, to +hear him nibbling away at our crusts. + +"Mr. Moodie," said I, "do you remember selling me one of those very +pretty little silk purses, of which you seem to have a monopoly in +the market? I keep it to this day, I can assure you." + +"Ah, thank you," said our guest. "Yes, Mr. Coverdale, I used to sell +a good many of those little purses." + +He spoke languidly, and only those few words, like a watch with an +inelastic spring, that just ticks a moment or two and stops again. +He seemed a very forlorn old man. In the wantonness of youth, +strength, and comfortable condition,--making my prey of people's +individualities, as my custom was,--I tried to identify my mind with +the old fellow's, and take his view of the world, as if looking +through a smoke-blackened glass at the sun. It robbed the landscape +of all its life. Those pleasantly swelling slopes of our farm, +descending towards the wide meadows, through which sluggishly circled +the brimful tide of the Charles, bathing the long sedges on its +hither and farther shores; the broad, sunny gleam over the winding +water; that peculiar picturesqueness of the scene where capes and +headlands put themselves boldly forth upon the perfect level of the +meadow, as into a green lake, with inlets between the promontories; +the shadowy woodland, with twinkling showers of light falling into +its depths; the sultry heat-vapor, which rose everywhere like incense, +and in which my soul delighted, as indicating so rich a fervor in +the passionate day, and in the earth that was burning with its love,-- +I beheld all these things as through old Moodie's eyes. When my +eyes are dimmer than they have yet come to be, I will go thither +again, and see if I did not catch the tone of his mind aright, and if +the cold and lifeless tint of his perceptions be not then repeated in +my own. + +Yet it was unaccountable to myself, the interest that I felt in him. + +"Have you any objection," said I, "to telling me who made those +little purses?" + +"Gentlemen have often asked me that," said Moodie slowly; "but I +shake my head, and say little or nothing, and creep out of the way as +well as I can. I am a man of few words; and if gentlemen were to be +told one thing, they would be very apt, I suppose, to ask me another. +But it happens just now, Mr. Coverdale, that you can tell me more +about the maker of those little purses than I can tell you." + +"Why do you trouble him with needless questions, Coverdale?" +interrupted Hollingsworth. "You must have known, long ago, that it +was Priscilla. And so, my good friend, you have come to see her? +Well, I am glad of it. You will find her altered very much for the +better, since that winter evening when you put her into my charge. +Why, Priscilla has a bloom in her cheeks, now!" + +"Has my pale little girl a bloom?" repeated Moodie with a kind of +slow wonder. "Priscilla with a bloom in her cheeks! Ah, I am afraid +I shall not know my little girl. And is she happy?" + +"Just as happy as a bird," answered Hollingsworth. + +"Then, gentlemen," said our guest apprehensively," I don't think it +well for me to go any farther. I crept hitherward only to ask about +Priscilla; and now that you have told me such good news, perhaps I +can do no better than to creep back again. If she were to see this +old face of mine, the child would remember some very sad times which +we have spent together. Some very sad times, indeed! She has +forgotten them, I know,--them and me,--else she could not be so happy, +nor have a bloom in her cheeks. Yes--yes--yes," continued he, still +with the same torpid utterance; "with many thanks to you, Mr. +Hollingsworth, I will creep back to town again." + +"You shall do no such thing, Mr. Moodie," said Hollingsworth bluffly. +"Priscilla often speaks of you; and if there lacks anything to make +her cheeks bloom like two damask roses, I'll venture to say it is +just the sight of your face. Come,--we will go and find her." + +"Mr. Hollingsworth!" said the old man in his hesitating way. + +"Well," answered Hollingsworth. + +"Has there been any call for Priscilla?" asked Moodie; and though his +face was hidden from us, his tone gave a sure indication of the +mysterious nod and wink with which he put the question. "You know, I +think, sir, what I mean." + +"I have not the remotest suspicion what you mean, Mr. Moodie," +replied Hollingsworth; "nobody, to my knowledge, has called for +Priscilla, except yourself. But come; we are losing time, and I have +several things to say to you by the way." + +"And, Mr. Hollingsworth!" repeated Moodie. + +"Well, again!" cried my friend rather impatiently. "What now?" + +"There is a lady here," said the old man; and his voice lost some of +its wearisome hesitation. "You will account it a very strange matter +for me to talk about; but I chanced to know this lady when she was +but a little child. If I am rightly informed, she has grown to be a +very fine woman, and makes a brilliant figure in the world, with her +beauty, and her talents, and her noble way of spending her riches. I +should recognize this lady, so people tell me, by a magnificent +flower in her hair." + +"What a rich tinge it gives to his colorless ideas, when he speaks of +Zenobia!" I whispered to Hollingsworth. "But how can there possibly +be any interest or connecting link between him and her?" + +"The old man, for years past," whispered Hollingsworth, "has been a +little out of his right mind, as you probably see." + +"What I would inquire," resumed Moodie, "is whether this beautiful +lady is kind to my poor Priscilla." + +"Very kind," said Hollingsworth. + +"Does she love her?" asked Moodie. + +"It should seem so," answered my friend. "They are always together." + +"Like a gentlewoman and her maid-servant, I fancy?" suggested the old +man. + +There was something so singular in his way of saying this, that I +could not resist the impulse to turn quite round, so as to catch a +glimpse of his face, almost imagining that I should see another +person than old Moodie. But there he sat, with the patched side of +his face towards me. + +"Like an elder and younger sister, rather," replied Hollingsworth. + +"Ah!" said Moodie more complacently, for his latter tones had +harshness and acidity in them,--"it would gladden my old heart to +witness that. If one thing would make me happier than another, Mr. +Hollingsworth, it would be to see that beautiful lady holding my +little girl by the hand." + +"Come along," said Hollingsworth, "and perhaps you may." + +After a little more delay on the part of our freakish visitor, they +set forth together, old Moodie keeping a step or two behind +Hollingsworth, so that the latter could not very conveniently look +him in the face. I remained under the tuft of maples, doing my +utmost to draw an inference from the scene that had just passed. In +spite of Hollingsworth's off-hand explanation, it did not strike me +that our strange guest was really beside himself, but only that his +mind needed screwing up, like an instrument long out of tune, the +strings of which have ceased to vibrate smartly and sharply. +Methought it would be profitable for us, projectors of a happy life, +to welcome this old gray shadow, and cherish him as one of us, and +let him creep about our domain, in order that he might be a little +merrier for our sakes, and we, sometimes, a little sadder for his. +Human destinies look ominous without some perceptible intermixture of +the sable or the gray. And then, too, should any of our fraternity +grow feverish with an over-exulting sense of prosperity, it would be +a sort of cooling regimen to slink off into the woods, and spend an +hour, or a day, or as many days as might be requisite to the cure, in +uninterrupted communion with this deplorable old Moodie! + +Going homeward to dinner, I had a glimpse of him, behind the trunk of +a tree, gazing earnestly towards a particular window of the farmhouse; +and by and by Priscilla appeared at this window, playfully drawing +along Zenobia, who looked as bright as the very day that was blazing +down upon us, only not, by many degrees, so well advanced towards her +noon. I was convinced that this pretty sight must have been +purposely arranged by Priscilla for the old man to see. But either +the girl held her too long, or her fondness was resented as too great +a freedom; for Zenobia suddenly put Priscilla decidedly away, and +gave her a haughty look, as from a mistress to a dependant. Old +Moodie shook his head; and again and again I saw him shake it, as he +withdrew along the road; and at the last point whence the farmhouse +was visible, he turned and shook his uplifted staff. + + + +XI. THE WOOD-PATH + +Not long after the preceding incident, in order to get the ache of +too constant labor out of my bones, and to relieve my spirit of the +irksomeness of a settled routine, I took a holiday. It was my +purpose to spend it all alone, from breakfast-time till twilight, in +the deepest wood-seclusion that lay anywhere around us. Though fond +of society, I was so constituted as to need these occasional +retirements, even in a life like that of Blithedale, which was itself +characterized by a remoteness from the world. Unless renewed by a +yet further withdrawal towards the inner circle of self-communion, I +lost the better part of my individuality. My thoughts became of +little worth, and my sensibilities grew as arid as a tuft of moss (a +thing whose life is in the shade, the rain, or the noontide dew), +crumbling in the sunshine after long expectance of a shower. So, +with my heart full of a drowsy pleasure, and cautious not to +dissipate my mood by previous intercourse with any one, I hurried +away, and was soon pacing a wood-path, arched overhead with + +boughs, and dusky-brown beneath my feet. + +At first I walked very swiftly, as if the heavy flood tide of social +life were roaring at my heels, and would outstrip and overwhelm me, +without all the better diligence in my escape. But, threading the +more distant windings of the track, I abated my pace, and looked +about me for some side-aisle, that should admit me into the innermost +sanctuary of this green cathedral, just as, in human acquaintanceship, +a casual opening sometimes lets us, all of a sudden, into the +long-sought intimacy of a mysterious heart. So much was I absorbed +in my reflections,--or, rather, in my mood, the substance of which +was as yet too shapeless to be called thought,--that footsteps +rustled on the leaves, and a figure passed me by, almost without +impressing either the sound or sight upon my consciousness. + +A moment afterwards, I heard a voice at a little distance behind me, +speaking so sharply and impertinently that it made a complete discord +with my spiritual state, and caused the latter to vanish as abruptly +as when you thrust a finger into a soap-bubble. + +"Halloo, friend!" cried this most unseasonable voice. "Stop a moment, +I say! I must have a word with you!" + +I turned about, in a humor ludicrously irate. In the first place, +the interruption, at any rate, was a grievous injury; then, the tone +displeased me. And finally, unless there be real affection in his +heart, a man cannot,--such is the bad state to which the world has +brought itself,--cannot more effectually show his contempt for a +brother mortal, nor more gallingly assume a position of superiority, +than by addressing him as "friend." Especially does the +misapplication of this phrase bring out that latent hostility which +is sure to animate peculiar sects, and those who, with however +generous a purpose, have sequestered themselves from the crowd; a +feeling, it is true, which may be hidden in some dog-kennel of the +heart, grumbling there in the darkness, but is never quite extinct, +until the dissenting party have gained power and scope enough to +treat the world generously. For my part, I should have taken it as +far less an insult to be styled "fellow," "clown," or "bumpkin." To +either of these appellations my rustic garb (it was a linen blouse, +with checked shirt and striped pantaloons, a chip hat on my head, and +a rough hickory stick in my hand) very fairly entitled me. As the +case stood, my temper darted at once to the opposite pole; not friend, +but enemy! + +"What do you want with me?" said I, facing about. + +"Come a little nearer, friend," said the stranger, beckoning. + +"No," answered I. "If I can do anything for you without too much +trouble to myself, say so. But recollect, if you please, that you +are not speaking to an acquaintance, much less a friend!" + +"Upon my word, I believe not!" retorted he, looking at me with some +curiosity; and, lifting his hat, he made me a salute which had enough +of sarcasm to be offensive, and just enough of doubtful courtesy to +render any resentment of it absurd. "But I ask your pardon! I +recognize a little mistake. If I may take the liberty to suppose it, +you, sir, are probably one of the aesthetic--or shall I rather say +ecstatic?--laborers, who have planted themselves hereabouts. This is +your forest of Arden; and you are either the banished Duke in person, +or one of the chief nobles in his train. The melancholy Jacques, +perhaps? Be it so. In that case, you can probably do me a favor." + +I never, in my life, felt less inclined to confer a favor on any man. + +"I am busy," said I. + +So unexpectedly had the stranger made me sensible of his presence, +that he had almost the effect of an apparition; and certainly a less +appropriate one (taking into view the dim woodland solitude about us) +than if the salvage man of antiquity, hirsute and cinctured with a +leafy girdle, had started out of a thicket. He was still young, +seemingly a little under thirty, of a tall and well-developed figure, +and as handsome a man as ever I beheld. The style of his beauty, +however, though a masculine style, did not at all commend itself to +my taste. His countenance--I hardly know how to describe the +peculiarity--had an indecorum in it, a kind of rudeness, a hard, +coarse, forth-putting freedom of expression, which no degree of +external polish could have abated one single jot. Not that it was +vulgar. But he had no fineness of nature; there was in his eyes +(although they might have artifice enough of another sort) the naked +exposure of something that ought not to be left prominent. With +these vague allusions to what I have seen in other faces as well as +his, I leave the quality to be comprehended best--because with an +intuitive repugnance--by those who possess least of it. + +His hair, as well as his beard and mustache, was coal-black; his eyes, +too, were black and sparkling, and his teeth remarkably brilliant. +He was rather carelessly but well and fashionably dressed, in a +summer-morning costume. There was a gold chain, exquisitely wrought, +across his vest. I never saw a smoother or whiter gloss than that +upon his shirt-bosom, which had a pin in it, set with a gem that +glimmered, in the leafy shadow where he stood, like a living tip of +fire. He carried a stick with a wooden head, carved in vivid +imitation of that of a serpent. I hated him, partly, I do believe, +from a comparison of my own homely garb with his well-ordered +foppishness. + +"Well, sir," said I, a little ashamed of my first irritation, but +still with no waste of civility, "be pleased to speak at once, as I +have my own business in hand." + +"I regret that my mode of addressing you was a little unfortunate," +said the stranger, smiling; for he seemed a very acute sort of person, +and saw, in some degree, how I stood affected towards him. "I +intended no offence, and shall certainly comport myself with due +ceremony hereafter. I merely wish to make a few inquiries respecting +a lady, formerly of my acquaintance, who is now resident in your +Community, and, I believe, + +largely concerned in your social enterprise. You call her, I think, +Zenobia." + +"That is her name in literature," observed I; "a name, too, which +possibly she may permit her private friends to know and address her +by,--but not one which they feel at liberty to recognize when used of +her personally by a stranger or casual acquaintance." + +"Indeed!" answered this disagreeable person; and he turned aside his +face for an instant with a brief laugh, which struck me as a +noteworthy expression of his character. "Perhaps I might put forward +a claim, on your own grounds, to call the lady by a name so +appropriate to her splendid qualities. But I am willing to know her +by any cognomen that you may suggest." + +Heartily wishing that he would be either a little more offensive, or +a good deal less so, or break off our intercourse altogether, I +mentioned Zenobia's real name. + +"True," said he; "and in general society I have never heard her +called otherwise. And, after all, our discussion of the point has +been gratuitous. My object is only to inquire when, where, and how +this lady may most conveniently be seen." + +"At her present residence, of course," I replied. "You have but to +go thither and ask for her. This very path will lead you within +sight of the house; so I wish you good-morning." + +"One moment, if you please," said the stranger. "The course you +indicate would certainly be the proper one, in an ordinary morning +call. But my business is private, personal, and somewhat peculiar. +Now, in a community like this, I should judge that any little +occurrence is likely to be discussed rather more minutely than would +quite suit my views. I refer solely to myself, you understand, and +without intimating that it would be other than a matter of entire +indifference to the lady. In short, I especially desire to see her +in private. If her habits are such as I have known them, she is +probably often to be met with in the woods, or by the river-side; and +I think you could do me the favor to point out some favorite walk, +where, about this hour, I might be fortunate enough to gain an +interview." + +I reflected that it would be quite a supererogatory piece of +Quixotism in me to undertake the guardianship of Zenobia, who, for my +pains, would only make me the butt of endless ridicule, should the +fact ever come to her knowledge. I therefore described a spot which, +as often as any other, was Zenobia's resort at this period of the day; +nor was it so remote from the farmhouse as to leave her in much +peril, whatever might be the stranger's character. + +"A single word more," said he; and his black eyes sparkled at me, +whether with fun or malice I knew not, but certainly as if the Devil +were peeping out of them. "Among your fraternity, I understand, +there is a certain holy and benevolent blacksmith; a man of iron, in +more senses than one; a rough, cross-grained, well-meaning individual, +rather boorish in his manners, as might be expected, and by no means +of the highest intellectual cultivation. He is a philanthropical +lecturer, with two or three disciples, and a scheme of his own, the +preliminary step in which involves a large purchase of land, and the +erection of a spacious edifice, at an expense considerably beyond his +means; inasmuch as these are to be reckoned in copper or old iron +much more conveniently than in gold or silver. He hammers away upon +his one topic as lustily as ever he did upon a horseshoe! Do you +know such a person?" I shook my head, and was turning away. "Our +friend," he continued, "is described to me as a brawny, shaggy, grim, +and ill-favored personage, not particularly well calculated, one +would say, to insinuate himself with the softer sex. Yet, so far has +this honest fellow succeeded with one lady whom we wot of, that he +anticipates, from her abundant resources, the necessary funds for +realizing his plan in brick and mortar!" + +Here the stranger seemed to be so much amused with his sketch of +Hollingsworth's character and purposes, that he burst into a fit of +merriment, of the same nature as the brief, metallic laugh already +alluded to, but immensely prolonged and enlarged. In the excess of +his delight, he opened his mouth wide, and disclosed a gold band +around the upper part of his teeth, thereby making it apparent that +every one of his brilliant grinders and incisors was a sham. This +discovery affected me very oddly. + +I felt as if the whole man were a moral and physical humbug; his +wonderful beauty of face, for aught I knew, might be removable like a +mask; and, tall and comely as his figure looked, he was perhaps but a +wizened little elf, gray and decrepit, with nothing genuine about him +save the wicked expression of his grin. The fantasy of his spectral +character so wrought upon me, together with the contagion of his +strange mirth on my sympathies, that I soon began to laugh as loudly +as himself. + +By and by, he paused all at once; so suddenly, indeed, that my own +cachinnation lasted a moment longer. + +"Ah, excuse me!" said he. "Our interview seems to proceed more +merrily than it began." + +"It ends here," answered I. "And I take shame to myself that my folly +has lost me the right of resenting your ridicule of a friend." + +"Pray allow me," said the stranger, approaching a step nearer, and +laying his gloved hand on my sleeve. "One other favor I must ask of +you. You have a young person here at Blithedale, of whom I have +heard,--whom, perhaps, I have known,--and in whom, at all events, I +take a peculiar interest. She is one of those delicate, nervous +young creatures, not uncommon in New England, and whom I suppose to +have become what we find them by the gradual refining away of the +physical system among your women. Some philosophers choose to +glorify this habit of body by terming it spiritual; but, in my +opinion, it is rather the effect of unwholesome food, bad air, lack +of outdoor exercise, and neglect of bathing, on the part of these +damsels and their female progenitors, all resulting in a kind of +hereditary dyspepsia. Zenobia, even with her uncomfortable surplus +of vitality, is far the better model of womanhood. But--to revert +again to this young person--she goes among you by the name of +Priscilla. Could you possibly afford me the means of speaking with +her?" + +"You have made so many inquiries of me," I observed, "that I may at +least trouble you with one. What is your name?" + +He offered me a card, with "Professor Westervelt" engraved on it. At +the same time, as if to vindicate his claim to the professorial +dignity, so often assumed on very questionable grounds, he put on a +pair of spectacles, which so altered the character of his face that I +hardly knew him again. But I liked the present aspect no better than +the former one. + +"I must decline any further connection with your affairs," said I, +drawing back. "I have told you where to find Zenobia. As for +Priscilla, she has closer friends than myself, through whom, if they +see fit, you can gain access to her." + +"In that case," returned the Professor, ceremoniously raising his hat, +"good-morning to you." + +He took his departure, and was soon out of sight among the windings +of the wood-path. But after a little reflection, I could not help +regretting that I had so peremptorily broken off the interview, while +the stranger seemed inclined to continue it. His evident knowledge +of matters affecting my three friends might have led to disclosures +or inferences that would perhaps have been serviceable. I was +particularly struck with the fact that, ever since the appearance of +Priscilla, it had been the tendency of events to suggest and +establish a connection between Zenobia and her. She had come, in the +first instance, as if with the sole purpose of claiming Zenobia's +protection. Old Moodie's visit, it appeared, was chiefly to +ascertain whether this object had been accomplished. And here, +to-day, was the questionable Professor, linking one with the other in +his inquiries, and seeking communication with both. + +Meanwhile, my inclination for a ramble having been balked, I lingered +in the vicinity of the farm, with perhaps a vague idea that some new +event would grow out of Westervelt's proposed interview with Zenobia. +My own part in these transactions was singularly subordinate. It +resembled that + +of the Chorus in a classic play, which seems to be set aloof from the +possibility of personal concernment, and bestows the whole measure of +its hope or fear, its exultation or sorrow, on the fortunes of others, +between whom and itself this sympathy is the only bond. Destiny, it +may be,--the most skilful of stage managers,--seldom chooses to +arrange its scenes, and carry forward its drama, without securing the +presence of at least one calm observer. It is his office to give +applause when due, and sometimes an inevitable tear, to detect the +final fitness of incident to character, and distil in his +long-brooding thought the whole morality of the performance. + +Not to be out of the way in case there were need of me in my vocation, +and, at the same time, to avoid thrusting myself where neither +destiny nor mortals might desire my presence, I remained pretty near +the verge of the woodlands. My position was off the track of +Zenobia's customary walk, yet not so remote but that a recognized +occasion might speedily have brought me thither. + + + +XII. COVERDALE'S HERMITAGE + +Long since, in this part of our circumjacent wood, I had found out +for myself a little hermitage. It was a kind of leafy cave, high +upward into the air, among the midmost branches of a white-pine tree. +A wild grapevine, of unusual size and luxuriance, had twined and +twisted itself up into the tree, and, after wreathing the +entanglement of its tendrils around almost every bough, had caught +hold of three or four neighboring + +trees, and married the whole clump with a perfectly inextricable knot +of polygamy. Once, while sheltering myself from a summer shower, the +fancy had taken me to clamber up into this seemingly impervious mass +of foliage. The branches yielded me a passage, and closed again +beneath, as if only a squirrel or a bird had passed. Far aloft, +around the stem of the central pine, behold a perfect nest for +Robinson Crusoe or King Charles! A hollow chamber of rare seclusion +had been formed by the decay of some of the pine branches, which the +vine had lovingly strangled with its embrace, burying them from the +light of day in an aerial sepulchre of its own leaves. It cost me +but little ingenuity to enlarge the interior, and open loopholes +through the verdant walls. Had it ever been my fortune to spend a +honeymoon, I should have thought seriously of inviting my bride up +thither, where our next neighbors would have been two orioles in +another part of the clump. + +It was an admirable place to make verses, tuning the rhythm to the +breezy symphony that so often stirred among the vine leaves; or to +meditate an essay for "The Dial," in which the many tongues of Nature +whispered mysteries, and seemed to ask only a little stronger puff of +wind to speak out the solution of its riddle. Being so pervious to +air-currents, it was just the nook, too, for the enjoyment of a cigar. +This hermitage was my one exclusive possession while I counted +myself a brother of the socialists. It symbolized my individuality, +and aided me in keeping it inviolate. None ever found me out in it, +except, once, a squirrel. I brought thither no guest, because, after +Hollingsworth failed me, there was no longer the man alive with whom +I could think of sharing all. So there I used to sit, owl-like, yet +not without liberal and hospitable thoughts. I counted the +innumerable clusters of my vine, and fore-reckoned the abundance of +my vintage. It gladdened me to anticipate the surprise of the +Community, when, like an allegorical figure of rich October, I should +make my appearance, with shoulders bent beneath the burden of ripe +grapes, and some of the crushed ones crimsoning my brow as with a +bloodstain. + +Ascending into this natural turret, I peeped in turn out of several +of its small windows. The pine-tree, being ancient, rose high above +the rest of the wood, which was of comparatively recent growth. Even +where I sat, about midway between the root and the topmost bough, my +position was lofty enough to serve as an observatory, not for starry +investigations, but for those sublunary matters in which lay a lore +as infinite as that of the planets. Through one loophole I saw the +river lapsing calmly onward, while in the meadow, near its brink, a +few of the brethren were digging peat for our winter's fuel. On the +interior cart-road of our farm I discerned Hollingsworth, with a yoke +of oxen hitched to a drag of stones, that were to be piled into a +fence, on which we employed ourselves at the odd intervals of other +labor. The harsh tones of his voice, shouting to the sluggish steers, +made me sensible, even at such a distance, that he was ill at ease, +and that the balked philanthropist had the battle-spirit in his heart. + +"Haw, Buck!" quoth he. "Come along there, ye lazy ones! What are ye +about, now? Gee!" + +"Mankind, in Hollingsworth's opinion," thought I, "is but another +yoke of oxen, as stubborn, stupid, and sluggish as our old Brown and +Bright. He vituperates us aloud, and curses us in his heart, and +will begin to prick us with the goad-stick, by and by. But are we +his oxen? And what right has he to be the driver? And why, when +there is enough else to do, should we waste our strength in dragging +home the ponderous load of his philanthropic absurdities? At my +height above the earth, the whole matter looks ridiculous!" + +Turning towards the farmhouse, I saw Priscilla (for, though a great +way off, the eye of faith assured me that it was she) sitting at +Zenobia's window, and making little purses, I suppose; or, perhaps, +mending the Community's old linen. A bird flew past my tree; and, as +it clove its way onward into the sunny atmosphere, I flung it a +message for Priscilla. + +"Tell her," said I, "that her fragile thread of life has inextricably +knotted itself with other and tougher threads, and most likely it +will be broken. Tell her that Zenobia will not be long her friend. +Say that Hollingsworth's heart is on fire with his own purpose, but +icy for all human affection; and that, if she has given him her love, +it is like casting a flower into a sepulchre. And say that if any +mortal really cares for her, it is myself; and not even I for her +realities,--poor little seamstress, as Zenobia rightly called her!-- +but for the fancy-work with which I have idly decked her out!" + +The pleasant scent of the wood, evolved by the hot sun, stole up to +my nostrils, as if I had been an idol in its niche. Many trees +mingled their fragrance into a thousand-fold odor. Possibly there +was a sensual influence in the broad light of noon that lay beneath +me. It may have been the cause, in part, that I suddenly found +myself possessed by a mood of disbelief in moral beauty or heroism, +and a conviction of the folly of attempting to benefit the world. +Our especial scheme of reform, which, from my observatory, I could +take in with the bodily eye, looked so ridiculous that it was +impossible not to laugh aloud. + +"But the joke is a little too heavy," thought I. "If I were wise, I +should get out of the scrape with all diligence, and then laugh at my +companions for remaining in it." + +While thus musing, I heard with perfect distinctness, somewhere in +the wood beneath, the peculiar laugh which I have described as one of +the disagreeable characteristics of Professor Westervelt. It brought +my thoughts back to our recent interview. I recognized as chiefly +due to this man's influence the sceptical and sneering view which +just now had filled my mental vision in regard to all life's better +purposes. And it was through his eyes, more than my own, that I was +looking at Hollingsworth, with his glorious if impracticable dream, +and at the noble earthliness of Zenobia's character, and even at +Priscilla, whose impalpable grace lay so singularly between disease +and beauty. The essential charm of each had vanished. There are +some spheres the contact with which inevitably degrades the high, +debases the pure, deforms the beautiful. It must be a mind of +uncommon strength, and little impressibility, that can permit itself +the habit of such intercourse, and not be permanently deteriorated; +and yet the Professor's tone represented that of worldly society at +large, where a cold scepticism smothers what it can of our spiritual +aspirations, and makes the rest ridiculous. I detested this kind of +man; and all the more because a part of my own nature showed itself +responsive to him. + +Voices were now approaching through the region of the wood which lay +in the vicinity of my tree. Soon I caught glimpses of two figures--a +woman and a man--Zenobia and the stranger--earnestly talking together +as they advanced. + +Zenobia had a rich though varying color. It was, most of the while, +a flame, and anon a sudden paleness. Her eyes glowed, so that their +light sometimes flashed upward to me, as when the sun throws a dazzle +from some bright object on the ground. Her gestures were free, and +strikingly impressive. The whole woman was alive with a passionate +intensity, which I now perceived to be the phase in which her beauty +culminated. Any passion would have become her well; and passionate +love, perhaps, the best of all. This was not love, but anger, +largely intermixed with scorn. Yet the idea strangely forced itself +upon me, that there was a sort of familiarity between these two +companions, necessarily the result of an intimate love,--on Zenobia's +part, at least,--in days gone by, but which had prolonged itself into +as intimate a hatred, for all futurity. As they passed among the +trees, reckless as her movement was, she took good heed that even the +hem of her garment should not brush against the stranger's person. I +wondered whether there had always been a chasm, guarded so +religiously, betwixt these two. + +As for Westervelt, he was not a whit more warmed by Zenobia's passion +than a salamander by the heat of its native furnace. He would have +been absolutely statuesque, save for a look of slight perplexity, +tinctured strongly with derision. It was a crisis in which his +intellectual perceptions could not altogether help him out. He +failed to comprehend, and cared but little for comprehending, why +Zenobia should put herself into such a fume; but satisfied his mind +that it was all folly, and only another shape of a woman's manifold +absurdity, which men can never understand. How many a woman's evil +fate has yoked her with a man like this! Nature thrusts some of us +into the world miserably incomplete on the emotional side, with +hardly any sensibilities except what pertain to us as animals. No +passion, save of the senses; no holy tenderness, nor the delicacy +that results from this. Externally they bear a close resemblance to +other men, and have perhaps all save the finest grace; but when a +woman wrecks herself on such a being, she ultimately finds that the +real womanhood within her has no corresponding part in him. Her +deepest voice lacks a response; the deeper her cry, the more dead his +silence. The fault may be none of his; he cannot give her what never +lived within his soul. But the wretchedness on her side, and the +moral deterioration attendant on a false and shallow life, without +strength enough to keep itself sweet, are among the most pitiable +wrongs that mortals suffer. + +Now, as I looked down from my upper region at this man and woman,-- +outwardly so fair a sight, and wandering like two lovers in the +wood,--I imagined that Zenobia, at an earlier period of youth, might +have fallen into the misfortune above indicated. And when her +passionate womanhood, as was inevitable, had discovered its mistake, +here had ensued the character of eccentricity and defiance which +distinguished the more public portion of her life. + +Seeing how aptly matters had chanced thus far, I began to think it +the design of fate to let me into all Zenobia's secrets, and that +therefore the couple would sit down beneath my tree, and carry on a +conversation which would leave me nothing to inquire. No doubt, +however, had it so happened, I should have deemed myself honorably +bound to warn them of a listener's presence by flinging down a +handful of unripe grapes, or by sending an unearthly groan out of my +hiding-place, as if this were one of the trees of Dante's ghostly +forest. But real life never arranges itself exactly like a romance. +In the first place, they did not sit down at all. Secondly, even +while they passed beneath the tree, Zenobia's utterance was so hasty +and broken, and Westervelt's so cool and low, that I hardly could +make out an intelligible sentence on either side. What I seem to +remember, I yet suspect, may have been patched together by my fancy, +in brooding over the matter afterwards. + +"Why not fling the girl off," said Westervelt, "and let her go?" + +"She clung to me from the first," replied Zenobia. "I neither know +nor care what it is in me that so attaches her. But she loves me, +and I will not fail her." + +"She will plague you, then," said he, "in more ways than one." + +"The poor child!" exclaimed Zenobia. "She can do me neither good nor +harm. How should she?" + +I know not what reply Westervelt whispered; nor did Zenobia's +subsequent exclamation give me any clew, except that it evidently +inspired her with horror and disgust. + +"With what kind of a being am I linked?" cried she. "If my Creator +cares aught for my soul, let him release me from this miserable bond!" + +"I did not think it weighed so heavily," said her companion.. + +"Nevertheless," answered Zenobia, "it will strangle me at last!" + +And then I heard her utter a helpless sort of moan; a sound which, +struggling out of the heart of a person of her pride and strength, +affected me more than if she had made the wood dolorously vocal with +a thousand shrieks and wails. + +Other mysterious words, besides what are above written, they spoke +together; but I understood no more, and even question whether I +fairly understood so much as this. By long brooding over our +recollections, we subtilize them into something akin to imaginary +stuff, and hardly capable of being distinguished from it. In a few +moments they were completely beyond ear-shot. A breeze stirred after +them, and awoke the leafy tongues of the surrounding trees, which +forthwith began to babble, as if innumerable gossips had all at once +got wind of Zenobia's secret. But, as the breeze grew stronger, its +voice among the branches was as if it said, "Hush! Hush!" and I +resolved that to no mortal would I disclose what I had heard. And, +though there might be room for casuistry, such, I conceive, is the +most equitable rule in all similar conjunctures. + + + +XIII. ZENOBIA'S LEGEND + +The illustrious Society of Blithedale, though it toiled in downright +earnest for the good of mankind, yet not unfrequently illuminated its +laborious life with an afternoon or evening of pastime. Picnics +under the trees were considerably in vogue; and, within doors, +fragmentary bits of theatrical performance, such as single acts of +tragedy or comedy, or dramatic proverbs and charades. Zenobia, +besides, was fond of giving us readings from Shakespeare, and often +with a depth of tragic power, or breadth of comic effect, that made +one feel it an intolerable wrong to the world that she did not at +once go upon the stage. Tableaux vivants were another of our +occasional modes of amusement, in which scarlet shawls, old silken +robes, ruffs, velvets, furs, and all kinds of miscellaneous trumpery +converted our familiar companions into the people of a pictorial +world. We had been thus engaged on the evening after the incident +narrated in the last chapter. Several splendid works of art--either +arranged after engravings from the old masters, or original +illustrations of scenes in history or romance--had been presented, +and we were earnestly entreating Zenobia for more. + +She stood with a meditative air, holding a large piece of gauze, or +some such ethereal stuff, as if considering what picture should next +occupy the frame; while at her feet lay a heap of many-colored +garments, which her quick fancy and magic skill could so easily +convert into gorgeous draperies for heroes and princesses. + +"I am getting weary of this," said she, after a moment's thought. +"Our own features, and our own figures and airs, show a little too +intrusively through all the characters we assume. We have so much +familiarity with + +one another's realities, that we cannot remove ourselves, at pleasure, +into an imaginary sphere. Let us have no more pictures to-night; +but, to make you what poor amends I can, how would you like to have +me trump up a wild, spectral legend, on the spur of the moment?" + +Zenobia had the gift of telling a fanciful little story, off-hand, in +a way that made it greatly more effective than it was usually found +to be when she afterwards elaborated the same production with her pen. +Her proposal, therefore, was greeted with acclamation. + +"Oh, a story, a story, by all means!" cried the young girls. "No +matter how marvellous; we will believe it, every word. And let it be +a ghost story, if you please." + +"No, not exactly a ghost story," answered Zenobia; "but something so +nearly like it that you shall hardly tell the difference. And, +Priscilla, stand you before me, where I may look at you, and get my +inspiration out of your eyes. They are very deep and dreamy to-night." + +I know not whether the following version of her story will retain any +portion of its pristine character; but, as Zenobia told it wildly and +rapidly, hesitating at no extravagance, and dashing at absurdities +which I am too timorous to repeat,--giving it the varied emphasis of +her inimitable voice, and the pictorial illustration of her mobile +face, while through it all we caught the freshest aroma of the +thoughts, as they came bubbling out of her mind,--thus narrated, and +thus heard, the legend seemed quite a remarkable affair. I scarcely +knew, at the time, whether she intended us to laugh or be more +seriously impressed. From beginning to end, it was undeniable +nonsense, but not necessarily the worse for that. + + + +THE SILVERY VEIL + +You have heard, my dear friends, of the Veiled Lady, who grew +suddenly so very famous, a few months ago. And have you never +thought how remarkable it was that this marvellous creature should +vanish, all at once, while her renown was on the increase, before the +public had grown weary of her, and when the enigma of her character, +instead of being solved, presented itself more mystically at every +exhibition? Her last appearance, as you know, was before a crowded +audience. The next evening,--although the bills had announced her, +at the corner of every street, in red letters of a gigantic size,-- +there was no Veiled Lady to be seen! Now, listen to my simple +little tale, and you shall hear the very latest incident in the known +life--(if life it may be called, which seemed to have no more reality +than the candle-light image of one's self which peeps at us outside +of a dark windowpane)--the life of this shadowy phenomenon. + +A party of young gentlemen, you are to understand, were enjoying +themselves, one afternoon,--as young gentlemen are sometimes fond of +doing,--over a bottle or two of champagne; and, among other ladies +less mysterious, the subject of the Veiled Lady, as was very natural, +happened to come up before them for discussion. She rose, as it were, +with the sparkling effervescence of their wine, and appeared in a +more airy and fantastic light on account of the medium through which +they saw her. They repeated to one another, between jest and earnest, +all the wild stories that were in vogue; nor, I presume, did they +hesitate to add any small circumstance that the inventive whim of the +moment might suggest, to heighten the marvellousness of their theme. + +"But what an audacious report was that," observed one, "which +pretended to assert the identity of this strange creature with a +young lady,"--and here he mentioned her name,--"the daughter of one +of our most distinguished families!" + +"Ah, there is more in that story than can well be accounted for," +remarked another. "I have it on good authority, that the young lady +in question is invariably out of sight, and not to be traced, even by +her own family, at the hours when the Veiled Lady is before the +public; nor can any satisfactory explanation be given of her +disappearance. And just look at the thing: Her brother is a young +fellow of spirit. He cannot but be aware of these rumors in +reference to his sister. Why, then, does he not come forward to +defend her character, unless he is conscious that an investigation +would only make the matter worse?" + +It is essential to the purposes of my legend to distinguish one of +these young gentlemen from his companions; so, for the sake of a soft +and pretty name (such as we of the literary sisterhood invariably +bestow upon our heroes), I deem it fit to call him Theodore. + +"Pshaw!" exclaimed Theodore; "her brother is no such fool! Nobody, +unless his brain be as full of bubbles as this wine, can seriously +think of crediting that ridiculous rumor. Why, if my senses did not +play me false (which never was the case yet), I affirm that I saw +that very lady, last evening, at the exhibition, while this veiled +phenomenon was playing off her juggling tricks! What can you say to +that?" + +"Oh, it was a spectral illusion that you saw!" replied his friends, +with a general laugh. "The Veiled Lady is quite up to such a thing." + +However, as the above-mentioned fable could not hold its ground +against Theodore's downright refutation, they went on to speak of +other stories which the wild babble of the town had set afloat. Some +upheld that the veil covered the most beautiful countenance in the +world; others,--and certainly with more reason, considering the sex +of the Veiled Lady,--that the face was the most hideous and horrible, +and that this was her sole motive for hiding it. It was the face of +a corpse; it was the head of a skeleton; it was a monstrous visage, +with snaky locks, like Medusa's, and one great red eye in the centre +of the forehead. Again, it was affirmed that there was no single and +unchangeable set of features beneath the veil; but that whosoever +should be bold enough to lift it would behold the features of that +person, in all the world, who was destined to be his fate; perhaps he +would be greeted by the tender smile of the woman whom he loved, or, +quite as probably, the deadly scowl of his bitterest enemy would +throw a blight over his life. They quoted, moreover, this startling +explanation of the whole affair: that the magician who exhibited the +Veiled Lady--and who, by the bye, was the handsomest man in the whole +world--had bartered his own soul for seven years' possession of a +familiar fiend, and that the last year of the contract was wearing +towards its close. + +If it were worth our while, I could keep you till an hour beyond +midnight listening to a thousand such absurdities as these. But +finally our friend Theodore, who prided himself upon his common-sense, +found the matter getting quite beyond his patience. + +"I offer any wager you like," cried he, setting down his glass so +forcibly as to break the stem of it, "that this very evening I find +out the mystery of the Veiled Lady!" + +Young men, I am told, boggle at nothing over their wine; so, after a +little more talk, a wager of considerable amount was actually laid, +the money staked, and Theodore left to choose his own method of +settling the dispute. + +How he managed it I know not, nor is it of any great importance to +this veracious legend. The most natural way, to be sure, was by +bribing the doorkeeper,--or possibly he preferred clambering in at +the window. But, at any rate, that very evening, while the +exhibition was going forward in the hall, Theodore contrived to gain +admittance into the private withdrawing-room whither the Veiled Lady +was accustomed to retire at the close of her performances. There he +waited, listening, I suppose, to the stifled hum of the great +audience; and no doubt he could distinguish the deep tones of the +magician, causing the wonders that he wrought to appear more dark and +intricate, by his mystic pretence of an explanation. Perhaps, too, +in the intervals of the wild breezy music which accompanied the +exhibition, he might hear the low voice of the Veiled Lady, conveying +her sibylline responses. Firm as Theodore's nerves might be, and +much as he prided himself on his sturdy perception of realities, I +should not be surprised if his heart throbbed at a little more than +its ordinary rate. + +Theodore concealed himself behind a screen. In due time the +performance was brought to a close, and whether the door was softly +opened, or whether her bodiless presence came through the wall, is +more than I can say, but, all at once, without the young man's +knowing how it happened, a veiled figure stood in the centre of the +room. It was one thing to be in presence of this mystery in the hall +of exhibition, where the warm, dense life of hundreds of other +mortals kept up the beholder's courage, and distributed her influence +among so many; it was another thing to be quite alone with her, and +that, too, with a hostile, or, at least, an unauthorized and +unjustifiable purpose. I further imagine that Theodore now began to +be sensible of something more serious in his enterprise than he had +been quite aware of while he sat with his boon-companions over their +sparkling wine. + +Very strange, it must be confessed, was the movement with which the +figure floated to and fro over the carpet, with the silvery veil +covering her from head to foot; so impalpable, so ethereal, so +without substance, as the texture seemed, yet hiding her every +outline in an impenetrability like that of midnight. Surely, she did +not walk! She floated, and flitted, and hovered about the room; no +sound of a footstep, no perceptible motion of a limb; it was as if a +wandering breeze wafted her before it, at its own wild and gentle +pleasure. But, by and by, a purpose began to be discernible, +throughout the seeming vagueness of her unrest. She was in quest of +something. Could it be that a subtile presentiment had informed her +of the young man's presence? And if so, did the Veiled Lady seek or +did she shun him? The doubt in Theodore's mind was speedily resolved; +for, after a moment or two of these erratic flutterings, she +advanced more decidedly, and stood motionless before the screen. + +"Thou art here!" said a soft, low voice. "Come forth, Theodore!" +Thus summoned by his name, Theodore, as a man of courage, had no +choice. He emerged from his concealment, and presented himself +before the Veiled Lady, with the wine-flush, it may be, quite gone +out of his cheeks. + +"What wouldst thou with me?" she inquired, with the same gentle +composure that was in her former utterance. + +"Mysterious creature," replied Theodore, "I would know who and what +you are!" + +"My lips are forbidden to betray the secret," said the Veiled Lady. + +"At whatever risk, I must discover it," rejoined Theodore. + +"Then," said the Mystery, "there is no way save to lift my veil." + +And Theodore, partly recovering his audacity, stept forward on the +instant, to do as the Veiled Lady had suggested. But she floated +backward to the opposite side of the room, as if the young man's +breath had possessed power enough to waft her away. + +"Pause, one little instant," said the soft, low voice, "and learn the +conditions of what thou art so bold to undertake. Thou canst go +hence, and think of me no more; or, at thy option, thou canst lift +this mysterious veil, beneath which I am a sad and lonely prisoner, +in a bondage which is worse to me than death. But, before raising it, +I entreat thee, in all maiden modesty, to bend forward and impress a +kiss where my breath stirs the veil; and my virgin lips shall come +forward to meet thy lips; and from that instant, Theodore, thou shalt +be mine, and I thine, with never more a veil between us. And all the +felicity of earth and of the future world shall be thine and mine +together. So much may a maiden say behind the veil. If thou +shrinkest from this, there is yet another way." "And what is that?" +asked Theodore. "Dost thou hesitate," said the Veiled Lady, "to +pledge thyself to me, by meeting these lips of mine, while the veil +yet hides my face? Has not thy heart recognized me? Dost thou come +hither, not in holy faith, nor with a pure and generous purpose, but +in scornful scepticism and idle curiosity? Still, thou mayest lift +the veil! But, from that instant, Theodore, I am doomed to be thy +evil fate; nor wilt thou ever taste another breath of happiness!" + +There was a shade of inexpressible sadness in the utterance of these +last words. But Theodore, whose natural tendency was towards +scepticism, felt himself almost injured and insulted by the Veiled +Lady's proposal that he should pledge himself, for life and eternity, +to so questionable a creature as herself; or even that she should +suggest an inconsequential kiss, taking into view the probability +that her face was none of the most bewitching. A delightful idea, +truly, that he should salute the lips of a dead girl, or the jaws of +a skeleton, or the grinning cavity of a monster's mouth! Even should +she prove a comely maiden enough in other respects, the odds were ten +to one that her teeth were defective; a terrible drawback on the +delectableness of a kiss. + +"Excuse me, fair lady," said Theodore, and I think he nearly burst +into a laugh, "if I prefer to lift the veil first; and for this +affair of the kiss, we may decide upon it afterwards." + +"Thou hast made thy choice," said the sweet, sad voice behind the +veil; and there seemed a tender but unresentful sense of wrong done +to womanhood by the young man's contemptuous interpretation of her +offer. "I must not counsel thee to pause, although thy fate is still +in thine own hand!" + +Grasping at the veil, he flung it upward, and caught a glimpse of a +pale, lovely face beneath; just one momentary glimpse, and then the +apparition vanished, and the silvery veil fluttered slowly down and +lay upon the floor. Theodore was alone. Our legend leaves him there. +His retribution was, to pine forever and ever for another sight of +that dim, mournful face,--which might have been his life-long +household fireside joy,--to desire, and waste life in a feverish +quest, and never meet it more. + +But what, in good sooth, had become of the Veiled Lady? Had all her +existence been comprehended within that mysterious veil, and was she +now annihilated? Or was she a spirit, with a heavenly essence, but +which might have been tamed down to human bliss, had Theodore been +brave and true enough to claim her? Hearken, my sweet friends,--and +hearken, dear Priscilla,--and you shall learn the little more that +Zenobia can tell you. + +Just at the moment, so far as can be ascertained, when the Veiled +Lady vanished, a maiden, pale and shadowy, rose up amid a knot of +visionary people, who were seeking for the better life. She was so +gentle and so sad,--a nameless melancholy gave her such hold upon +their sympathies,--that they never thought of questioning whence she +came. She might have heretofore existed, or her thin substance might +have been moulded out of air at the very instant when they first +beheld her. It was all one to them; they took her to their hearts. +Among them was a lady to whom, more than to all the rest, this pale, +mysterious girl attached herself. + +But one morning the lady was wandering in the woods, and there met +her a figure in an Oriental robe, with a dark beard, and holding in +his hand a silvery veil. He motioned her to stay. Being a woman of +some nerve, she did not shriek, nor run away, nor faint, as many +ladies would have been apt to do, but stood quietly, and bade him +speak. The truth was, she had seen his face before, but had never +feared it, although she knew him to be a terrible magician. + +"Lady," said he, with a warning gesture, "you are in peril!" "Peril!" +she exclaimed. "And of what nature?" + +"There is a certain maiden," replied the magician, "who has come out +of the realm of mystery, and made herself your most intimate +companion. Now, the fates have so ordained it, that, whether by her +own will or no, this stranger is your deadliest enemy. In love, in +worldly fortune, in all your pursuit of happiness, she is doomed to +fling a blight over your prospects. There is but one possibility of +thwarting her disastrous influence." + +"Then tell me that one method," said the lady. + +"Take this veil," he answered, holding forth the silvery texture. +"It is a spell; it is a powerful enchantment, which I wrought for her +sake, and beneath which she was once my prisoner. Throw it, at +unawares, over the head of this secret foe, stamp your foot, and cry, +'Arise, Magician! Here is the Veiled Lady!' and immediately I will +rise up through the earth, and seize her; and from that moment you +are safe!" + +So the lady took the silvery veil, which was like woven air, or like +some substance airier than nothing, and that would float upward and +be lost among the clouds, were she once to let it go. Returning +homeward, she found the shadowy girl amid the knot of visionary +transcendentalists, who were still seeking for the better life. She +was joyous now, and had a rose-bloom in her cheeks, and was one of +the prettiest creatures, and seemed one of the happiest, that the +world could show. But the lady stole noiselessly behind her and +threw the veil over her head. As the slight, ethereal texture sank +inevitably down over her figure, the poor girl strove to raise it, +and met her dear friend's eyes with one glance of mortal terror, and +deep, deep reproach. It could not change her purpose. + +"Arise, Magician!" she exclaimed, stamping her foot upon the earth. +"Here is the Veiled Lady!" + +At the word, up rose the bearded man in the Oriental robes,--the +beautiful, the dark magician, who had bartered away his soul! He +threw his arms around the Veiled Lady, and she was his bond-slave for +evermore! + + +Zenobia, all this while, had been holding the piece of gauze, and so +managed it as greatly to increase the dramatic effect of the legend +at those points where the magic veil was to be described. Arriving +at the catastrophe, and uttering the fatal words, she flung the gauze +over Priscilla's head; and for an instant her auditors held their +breath, half expecting, I verily believe, that the magician would +start up through the floor, and carry off our poor little friend +before our eyes. + +As for Priscilla, she stood droopingly in the midst of us, making no +attempt to remove the veil. + +"How do you find yourself, my love?" said Zenobia, lifting a corner +of the gauze, and peeping beneath it with a mischievous smile. "Ah, +the dear little soul! Why, she is really going to faint! Mr. +Coverdale, Mr. Coverdale, pray bring a glass of water!" + +Her nerves being none of the strongest, Priscilla hardly recovered +her equanimity during the rest of the evening. This, to be sure, was +a great pity; but, nevertheless, we thought it a very bright idea of +Zenobia's to bring her legend to so effective a conclusion. + + + +XIV. ELIOT'S PULPIT + +Our Sundays at Blithedale were not ordinarily kept with such rigid +observance as might have befitted the descendants of the Pilgrims, +whose high enterprise, as we sometimes flattered ourselves, we had +taken up, and were carrying it onward and aloft, to a point which +they never dreamed of attaining. + +On that hallowed day, it is true, we rested from our labors. Our +oxen, relieved from their week-day yoke, roamed at large through the +pasture; each yoke-fellow, however, keeping close beside his mate, +and continuing to acknowledge, from the force of habit and sluggish +sympathy, the union which the taskmaster had imposed for his own hard +ends. As for us human yoke-fellows, chosen companions of toil, whose +hoes had clinked together throughout the week, we wandered off, in +various directions, to enjoy our interval of repose. Some, I believe, +went devoutly to the village church. Others, it may be, ascended a +city or a country pulpit, wearing the clerical robe with so much +dignity that you would scarcely have suspected the yeoman's frock to +have been flung off only since milking-time. Others took long +rambles among the rustic lanes and by-paths, pausing to look at black +old farmhouses, with their sloping roofs; and at the modern cottage, +so like a plaything that it seemed as if real joy or sorrow could +have no scope within; and at the more pretending villa, with its +range of wooden columns supporting the needless insolence of a great +portico. Some betook themselves into the wide, dusky barn, and lay +there for hours together on the odorous hay; while the sunstreaks and +the shadows strove together,--these to make the barn solemn, those to +make it cheerful,--and both were conquerors; and the swallows +twittered a cheery anthem, flashing into sight, or vanishing as they +darted to and fro among the golden rules of sunshine. And others +went a little way into the woods, and threw themselves on mother +earth, pillowing their heads on a heap of moss, the green decay of an +old log; and, dropping asleep, the bumblebees and mosquitoes sung and +buzzed about their ears, causing the slumberers to twitch and start, +without awaking. + +With Hollingsworth, Zenobia, Priscilla, and myself, it grew to be a +custom to spend the Sabbath afternoon at a certain rock. It was +known to us under the name of Eliot's pulpit, from a tradition that +the venerable Apostle Eliot had preached there, two centuries gone by, +to an Indian auditory. The old pine forest, through which the +Apostle's voice was wont to sound, had fallen an immemorial time ago. +But the soil, being of the rudest and most broken surface, had +apparently never been brought under tillage; other growths, maple and +beech and birch, had succeeded to the primeval trees; so that it was +still as wild a tract of woodland as the great-great-great-great +grandson of one of Eliot's Indians (had any such posterity been in +existence) could have desired for the site and shelter of his wigwam. +These after-growths, indeed, lose the stately solemnity of the +original forest. If left in due neglect, however, they run into an +entanglement of softer wildness, among the rustling leaves of which +the sun can scatter cheerfulness as it never could among the +dark-browed pines. + +The rock itself rose some twenty or thirty feet, a shattered granite +bowlder, or heap of bowlders, with an irregular outline and many +fissures, out of which sprang shrubs, bushes, and even trees; as if +the scanty soil within those crevices were sweeter to their roots +than any other earth. At the base of the pulpit, the broken bowlders +inclined towards each other, so as to form a shallow cave, within +which our little party had sometimes found protection from a summer +shower. On the threshold, or just across it, grew a tuft of pale +columbines, in their season, and violets, sad and shadowy recluses, +such as Priscilla was when we first knew her; children of the sun, +who had never seen their father, but dwelt among damp mosses, though +not akin to them. At the summit, the rock was overshadowed by the +canopy of a birch-tree, which served as a sounding-board for the +pulpit. Beneath this shade (with my eyes of sense half shut and +those of the imagination widely opened) I used to see the holy +Apostle of the Indians, with the sunlight flickering down upon him +through the leaves, and glorifying his figure as with the +half-perceptible glow of a transfiguration. + +I the more minutely describe the rock, and this little Sabbath +solitude, because Hollingsworth, at our solicitation, often ascended +Eliot's pulpit, and not exactly preached, but talked to us, his few +disciples, in a strain that rose and fell as naturally as the wind's +breath among the leaves of the birch-tree. No other speech of man +has ever moved me like some of those discourses. It seemed most +pitiful--a positive calamity to the world--that a treasury of golden +thoughts should thus be scattered, by the liberal handful, down among +us three, when a thousand hearers might have been the richer for them; +and Hollingsworth the richer, likewise, by the sympathy of +multitudes. After speaking much or little, as might happen, he would +descend from his gray pulpit, and generally fling himself at full +length on the ground, face downward. Meanwhile, we talked around him +on such topics as were suggested by the discourse. + +Since her interview with Westervelt, Zenobia's continual inequalities +of temper had been rather difficult for her friends to bear. On the +first Sunday after that incident, when Hollingsworth had clambered +down from Eliot's pulpit, she declaimed with great earnestness and +passion, nothing short of anger, on the injustice which the world did +to women, and equally to itself, by not allowing them, in freedom and +honor, and with the fullest welcome, their natural utterance in +public. + +"It shall not always be so!" cried she. "If I live another year, I +will lift up my own voice in behalf of woman's wider liberty!" + +She perhaps saw me smile. + +"What matter of ridicule do you find in this, Miles Coverdale?" +exclaimed Zenobia, with a flash of anger in her eyes. "That smile, +permit me to say, makes me suspicious of a low tone of feeling and +shallow thought. It is my belief--yes, and my prophecy, should I die +before it happens--that, when my sex shall achieve its rights, there +will be ten eloquent women where there is now one eloquent man. Thus +far, no woman in the world has ever once spoken out her whole heart +and her whole mind. The mistrust and disapproval of the vast bulk of +society throttles us, as with two gigantic hands at our throats! We +mumble a few weak words, and leave a thousand better ones unsaid. +You let us write a little, it is true, on a limited range of subjects. +But the pen is not for woman. Her power is too natural and +immediate. It is with the living voice alone that she can compel the +world to recognize the light of her intellect and the depth of her +heart!" + +Now,--though I could not well say so to Zenobia,--I had not smiled +from any unworthy estimate of woman, or in denial of the claims which +she is beginning to put forth. What amused and puzzled me was the +fact, that women, however intellectually superior, so seldom disquiet +themselves about the rights or wrongs of their sex, unless their own +individual affections chance to lie in idleness, or to be ill at ease. +They are not natural reformers, but become such by the pressure of +exceptional misfortune. I could measure Zenobia's inward trouble by +the animosity with which she now took up the general quarrel of woman +against man. + +"I will give you leave, Zenobia," replied I, "to fling your utmost +scorn upon me, if you ever hear me utter a sentiment unfavorable to +the widest liberty which woman has yet dreamed of. I would give her +all she asks, and add a great deal more, which she will not be the +party to demand, but which men, if they were generous and wise, would +grant of their own free motion. For instance, I should love +dearly--for the next thousand years, at least--to have all government +devolve into the hands of women. I hate to be ruled by my own sex; +it excites my jealousy, and wounds my pride. It is the iron sway of +bodily force which abases us, in our compelled submission. But how +sweet the free, generous courtesy with which I would kneel before a +woman-ruler!" + +"Yes, if she were young and beautiful," said Zenobia, laughing. "But +how if she were sixty, and a fright?" + +"Ah! it is you that rate womanhood low," said I. "But let me go on. +I have never found it possible to suffer a bearded priest so near my +heart and conscience as to do me any spiritual good. I blush at the +very thought! Oh, in the better order of things, Heaven grant that +the ministry of souls may be left in charge of women! The gates of +the Blessed City will be thronged with the multitude that enter in, +when that day comes! The task belongs to woman. God meant it for +her. He has endowed her with the religious sentiment in its utmost +depth and purity, refined from that gross, intellectual alloy with +which every masculine theologist--save only One, who merely veiled +himself in mortal and masculine shape, but was, in truth, divine--has +been prone to mingle it. I have always envied the Catholics their +faith in that sweet, sacred Virgin Mother, who stands between them +and the Deity, intercepting somewhat of his awful splendor, but +permitting his love to stream upon the worshipper more intelligibly +to human comprehension through the medium of a woman's tenderness. +Have I not said enough, Zenobia?" + +"I cannot think that this is true," observed Priscilla, who had been +gazing at me with great, disapproving eyes. "And I am sure I do not +wish it to be true!" + +"Poor child!" exclaimed Zenobia, rather contemptuously. "She is the +type of womanhood, such as man has spent centuries in making it. He +is never content unless he can degrade himself by stooping towards +what he loves. In denying us our rights, he betrays even more +blindness to his own interests than profligate disregard of ours!" + +"Is this true?" asked Priscilla with simplicity, turning to +Hollingsworth. "Is it all true, that Mr. Coverdale and Zenobia have +been saying?" + +"No, Priscilla!" answered Hollingsworth with his customary bluntness. +"They have neither of them spoken one true word yet." + +"Do you despise woman?" said Zenobia. + +"Ah, Hollingsworth, that would be most ungrateful!" + +"Despise her? No!" cried Hollingsworth, lifting his great shaggy +head and shaking it at us, while his eyes glowed almost fiercely. +"She is the most admirable handiwork of God, in her true place and +character. Her place is at man's side. Her office, that of the +sympathizer; the unreserved, unquestioning believer; the recognition, +withheld in every other manner, but given, in pity, through woman's +heart, lest man should utterly lose faith in himself; the echo of +God's own voice, pronouncing, 'It is well done!' All the separate +action of woman is, and ever has been, and always shall be, false, +foolish, vain, destructive of her own best and holiest qualities, +void of every good effect, and productive of intolerable mischiefs! +Man is a wretch without woman; but woman is a monster--and, thank +Heaven, an almost impossible and hitherto imaginary monster--without +man as her acknowledged principal! As true as I had once a mother +whom I loved, were there any possible prospect of woman's taking the +social stand which some of them,--poor, miserable, abortive creatures, +who only dream of such things because they have missed woman's +peculiar happiness, or because nature made them really neither man +nor woman!--if there were a chance of their attaining the end which +these petticoated monstrosities have in view, I would call upon my +own sex to use its physical force, that unmistakable evidence of +sovereignty, to scourge them back within their proper bounds! But it +will not be needful. The heart of time womanhood knows where its own +sphere is, and never seeks to stray beyond it!" + +Never was mortal blessed--if blessing it were--with a glance of such +entire acquiescence and unquestioning faith, happy in its +completeness, as our little Priscilla unconsciously bestowed on +Hollingsworth. She seemed to take the sentiment from his lips into +her heart, and brood over it in perfect content. The very woman whom +he pictured--the gentle parasite, the soft reflection of a more +powerful existence--sat there at his feet. + +I looked at Zenobia, however, fully expecting her to resent--as I +felt, by the indignant ebullition of my own blood, that she ought +this outrageous affirmation of what struck me as the intensity of +masculine egotism. It centred everything in itself, and deprived +woman of her very soul, her inexpressible and unfathomable all, to +make it a mere incident in the great sum of man. Hollingsworth had +boldly uttered what he, and millions of despots like him, really felt. +Without intending it, he had disclosed the wellspring of all these +troubled waters. Now, if ever, it surely behooved Zenobia to be the +champion of her sex. + +But, to my surprise, and indignation too, she only looked humbled. +Some tears sparkled in her eyes, but they were wholly of grief, not +anger. + +"Well, be it so," was all she said. "I, at least, have deep cause to +think you right. Let man be but manly and godlike, and woman is only +too ready to become to him what you say!" + +I smiled--somewhat bitterly, it is true--in contemplation of my own +ill-luck. How little did these two women care for me, who had freely +conceded all their claims, and a great deal more, out of the fulness +of my heart; while Hollingsworth, by some necromancy of his horrible +injustice, seemed to have brought them both to his feet! + +"Women almost invariably behave thus," thought I. "What does the fact +mean? Is it their nature? Or is it, at last, the result of ages of +compelled degradation? And, in either case, will it be possible ever +to redeem them?" + +An intuition now appeared to possess all the party, that, for this +time, at least, there was no more to be said. With one accord, we +arose from the ground, and made our way through the tangled +undergrowth towards one of those pleasant wood-paths that wound among +the overarching trees. Some of the branches hung so low as partly to +conceal the figures that went before from those who followed. +Priscilla had leaped up more lightly than the rest of us, and ran +along in advance, with as much airy activity of spirit as was +typified in the motion of a bird, which chanced to be flitting from +tree to tree, in the same direction as herself. Never did she seem +so happy as that afternoon. She skipt, and could not help it, from +very playfulness of heart. + +Zenobia and Hollingsworth went next, in close contiguity, but not +with arm in arm. Now, just when they had passed the impending bough +of a birch-tree, I plainly saw Zenobia take the hand of Hollingsworth +in both her own, press it to her bosom, and let it fall again! + +The gesture was sudden, and full of passion; the impulse had +evidently taken her by surprise; it expressed all! Had Zenobia knelt +before him, or flung herself upon his breast, and gasped out, "I love +you, Hollingsworth!" I could not have been more certain of what it +meant. They then walked onward, as before. But, methought, as the +declining sun threw Zenobia's magnified shadow along the path, I +beheld it tremulous; and the delicate stem of the flower which she +wore in her hair was likewise responsive to her agitation. + +Priscilla--through the medium of her eyes, at least could not +possibly have been aware of the gesture above described. Yet, at +that instant, I saw her droop. The buoyancy, which just before had +been so bird-like, was utterly departed; the life seemed to pass out +of her, and even the substance of her figure to grow thin and gray. +I almost imagined her a shadow, tiding gradually into the dimness of +the wood. Her pace became so slow that Hollingsworth and Zenobia +passed by, and I, without hastening my footsteps, overtook her. + +"Come, Priscilla," said I, looking her intently in the face, which +was very pale and sorrowful, "we must make haste after our friends. +Do you feel suddenly ill? A moment ago, you flitted along so lightly +that I was comparing you to a bird. Now, on the contrary, it is as +if you had a heavy heart, and a very little strength to bear it with. +Pray take my arm!" + +"No," said Priscilla, "I do not think it would help me. It is my +heart, as you say, that makes me heavy; and I know not why. Just now, +I felt very happy." + +No doubt it was a kind of sacrilege in me to attempt to come within +her maidenly mystery; but, as she appeared to be tossed aside by her +other friends, or carelessly let fall, like a flower which they had +done with, I could not resist the impulse to take just one peep +beneath her folded petals. + +"Zenobia and yourself are dear friends of late," I remarked. "At +first,--that first evening when you came to us,--she did not receive +you quite so warmly as might have been wished." + +"I remember it," said Priscilla. "No wonder she hesitated to love me, +who was then a stranger to her, and a girl of no grace or beauty,-- +she being herself so beautiful!" + +"But she loves you now, of course?" suggested I. "And at this very +instant you feel her to be your dearest friend?" + +"Why do you ask me that question?" exclaimed Priscilla, as if +frightened at the scrutiny into her feelings which I compelled her to +make. "It somehow puts strange thoughts into my mind. But I do love +Zenobia dearly! If she only loves me half as well, I shall be happy!" + +"How is it possible to doubt that, Priscilla?" I rejoined. "But +observe how pleasantly and happily Zenobia and Hollingsworth are +walking together. I call it a delightful spectacle. It truly +rejoices me that Hollingsworth has found so fit and affectionate a +friend! So many people in the world mistrust him,--so many +disbelieve and ridicule, while hardly any do him justice, or +acknowledge him for the wonderful man he is,--that it is really a +blessed thing for him to have won the sympathy of such a woman as +Zenobia. Any man might be proud of that. Any man, even if he be as +great as Hollingsworth, might love so magnificent a woman. How very +beautiful Zenobia is! And Hollingsworth knows it, too." + +There may have been some petty malice in what I said. Generosity is +a very fine thing, at a proper time and within due limits. But it is +an insufferable bore to see one man engrossing every thought of all +the women, and leaving his friend to shiver in outer seclusion, +without even the alternative of solacing himself with what the more +fortunate individual has rejected. Yes, it was out of a foolish +bitterness of heart that I had spoken. + +"Go on before," said Priscilla abruptly, and with true feminine +imperiousness, which heretofore I had never seen her exercise. "It +pleases me best to loiter along by myself. I do not walk so fast as +you." + +With her hand she made a little gesture of dismissal. It provoked me; +yet, on the whole, was the most bewitching thing that Priscilla had +ever done. I obeyed her, and strolled moodily homeward, +wondering--as I had wondered a thousand times already--how +Hollingsworth meant to dispose of these two hearts, which (plainly to +my perception, and, as I could not but now suppose, to his) he had +engrossed into his own huge egotism. + +There was likewise another subject hardly less fruitful of +speculation. In what attitude did Zenobia present herself to +Hollingsworth? Was it in that of a free woman, with no mortgage on +her affections nor claimant to her hand, but fully at liberty to +surrender both, in exchange for the heart and hand which she +apparently expected to receive? But was it a vision that I had +witnessed in the wood? Was Westervelt a goblin? Were those words of +passion and agony, which Zenobia had uttered in my hearing, a mere +stage declamation? Were they formed of a material lighter than +common air? Or, supposing them to bear sterling weight, was it a +perilous and dreadful wrong which she was meditating towards herself +and Hollingsworth? + +Arriving nearly at the farmhouse, I looked back over the long slope +of pasture land, and beheld them standing together, in the light of +sunset, just on the spot where, according to the gossip of the +Community, they meant to build their cottage. Priscilla, alone and +forgotten, was lingering in the shadow of the wood. + + + +XV. A CRISIS + +Thus the summer was passing away,--a summer of toil, of interest, of +something that was not pleasure, but which went deep into my heart, +and there became a rich experience. I found myself looking forward +to years, if not to a lifetime, to be spent on the same system. The +Community were now beginning to form their permanent plans. One of +our purposes was to erect a Phalanstery (as I think we called it, +after Fourier; but the phraseology of those days is not very fresh in +my remembrance), where the great and general family should have its +abiding-place. Individual members, too, who made it a point of +religion to preserve the sanctity of an exclusive home, were +selecting sites for their cottages, by the wood-side, or on the +breezy swells, or in the sheltered nook of some little valley, +according as their taste might lean towards snugness or the +picturesque. Altogether, by projecting our minds outward, we had +imparted a show of novelty to existence, and contemplated it as +hopefully as if the soil beneath our feet had not been fathom-deep +with the dust of deluded generations, on every one of which, as on +ourselves, the world had imposed itself as a hitherto unwedded bride. + +Hollingsworth and myself had often discussed these prospects. It was +easy to perceive, however, that he spoke with little or no fervor, +but either as questioning the fulfilment of our anticipations, or, at +any rate, with a quiet consciousness that it was no personal concern +of his. Shortly after the scene at Eliot's pulpit, while he and I +were repairing an old stone fence, I amused myself with sallying +forward into the future time. + +"When we come to be old men," I said, "they will call us uncles, or +fathers,--Father Hollingsworth and Uncle Coverdale,--and we will look +back cheerfully to these early days, and make a romantic story for +the young People (and if a little more romantic than truth may +warrant, it will be no harm) out of our severe trials and hardships. +In a century or two, we shall, every one of us, be mythical +personages, or exceedingly picturesque and poetical ones, at all +events. They will have a great public hall, in which your portrait, +and mine, and twenty other faces that are living now, shall be hung +up; and as for me, I will be painted in my shirtsleeves, and with the +sleeves rolled up, to show my muscular development. What stories +will be rife among them about our mighty strength!" continued I, +lifting a big stone and putting it into its place, "though our +posterity will really be far stronger than ourselves, after several +generations of a simple, natural, and active life. What legends of +Zenobia's beauty, and Priscilla's slender and shadowy grace, and +those mysterious qualities which make her seem diaphanous with +spiritual light! In due course of ages, we must all figure +heroically in an epic poem; and we will ourselves--at least, I +will--bend unseen over the future poet, and lend him inspiration +while he writes it." + +"You seem," said Hollingsworth, "to be trying how much nonsense you +can pour out in a breath." + +"I wish you would see fit to comprehend," retorted I, "that the +profoundest wisdom must be mingled with nine tenths of nonsense, else +it is not worth the breath that utters it. But I do long for the +cottages to be built, that the creeping plants may begin to run over +them, and the moss to gather on the walls, and the trees--which we +will set out--to cover them with a breadth of shadow. This +spick-and-span novelty does not quite suit my taste. It is time, too, +for children to be born among us. The first-born child is still to +come. And I shall never feel as if this were a real, practical, as +well as poetical system of human life, until somebody has sanctified +it by death." + +"A pretty occasion for martyrdom, truly!" said Hollingsworth. + +"As good as any other," I replied. "I wonder, Hollingsworth, who, of +all these strong men, and fair women and maidens, is doomed the first +to die. Would it not be well, even before we have absolute need of +it, to fix upon a spot for a cemetery? Let us choose the rudest, +roughest, most uncultivable spot, for Death's garden ground; and +Death shall teach us to beautify it, grave by grave. By our sweet, +calm way of dying, and the airy elegance out of which we will shape +our funeral rites, and the cheerful allegories which we will model +into tombstones, the final scene shall lose its terrors; so that +hereafter it may be happiness to live, and bliss to die. None of us +must die young. Yet, should Providence ordain it so, the event shall +not be sorrowful, but affect us with a tender, delicious, only +half-melancholy, and almost smiling pathos!" + +"That is to say," muttered Hollingsworth, "you will die like a +heathen, as you certainly live like one. But, listen to me, +Coverdale. Your fantastic anticipations make me discern all the more +forcibly what a wretched, unsubstantial scheme is this, on which we +have wasted a precious summer of our lives. Do you seriously imagine +that any such realities as you, and many others here, have dreamed of, +will ever be brought to pass?" + +"Certainly I do," said I. "Of course, when the reality comes, it will +wear the every-day, commonplace, dusty, and rather homely garb that +reality always does put on. But, setting aside the ideal charm, I +hold that our highest anticipations have a solid footing on common +sense." + +"You only half believe what you say," rejoined Hollingsworth; "and as +for me, I neither have faith in your dream, nor would care the value +of this pebble for its realization, were that possible. And what +more do you want of it? It has given you a theme for poetry. Let +that content you. But now I ask you to be, at last, a man of +sobriety and earnestness, and aid me in an enterprise which is worth +all our strength, and the strength of a thousand mightier than we." + +There can be no need of giving in detail the conversation that ensued. +It is enough to say that Hollingsworth once more brought forward +his rigid and unconquerable idea,--a scheme for the reformation of +the wicked by methods moral, intellectual, and industrial, by the +sympathy of pure, humble, and yet exalted minds, and by opening to +his pupils the possibility of a worthier life than that which had +become their fate. It appeared, unless he overestimated his own +means, that Hollingsworth held it at his choice (and he did so +choose) to obtain possession of the very ground on which we had +planted our Community, and which had not yet been made irrevocably +ours, by purchase. It was just the foundation that he desired. Our +beginnings might readily be adapted to his great end. The +arrangements already completed would work quietly into his system. +So plausible looked his theory, and, more than that, so practical,-- +such an air of reasonableness had he, by patient thought, thrown +over it,--each segment of it was contrived to dovetail into all the +rest with such a complicated applicability, and so ready was he with +a response for every objection, that, really, so far as logic and +argument went, he had the matter all his own way. + +"But," said I, "whence can you, having no means of your own, derive +the enormous capital which is essential to this experiment? State +Street, I imagine, would not draw its purser strings very liberally +in aid of such a speculation." + +"I have the funds--as much, at least, as is needed for a +commencement--at command," he answered. "They can be produced within +a month, if necessary." + +My thoughts reverted to Zenobia. It could only be her wealth which +Hollingsworth was appropriating so lavishly. And on what conditions +was it to be had? Did she fling it into the scheme with the +uncalculating generosity that characterizes a woman when it is her +impulse to be generous at all? And did she fling herself along with +it? But Hollingsworth did not volunteer an explanation. + +"And have you no regrets," I inquired, "in overthrowing this fair +system of our new life, which has been planned so deeply, and is now +beginning to flourish so hopefully around us? How beautiful it is, +and, so far as we can yet see, how practicable! The ages have waited +for us, and here we are, the very first that have essayed to carry on +our mortal existence in love and mutual help! Hollingsworth, I would +be loath to take the ruin of this enterprise upon my conscience." + +"Then let it rest wholly upon mine!" he answered, knitting his black +brows. "I see through the system. It is full of defects,-- +irremediable and damning ones!--from first to last, there is +nothing else! I grasp it in my hand, and find no substance whatever. +There is not human nature in it." + +"Why are you so secret in your operations?" I asked. "God forbid +that I should accuse you of intentional wrong; but the besetting sin +of a philanthropist, it appears to me, is apt to be a moral obliquity. +His sense of honor ceases to be the sense of other honorable men. +At some point of his course--I know not exactly when or where--he is +tempted to palter with the right, and can scarcely forbear persuading +himself that the importance of his public ends renders it allowable +to throw aside his private conscience. Oh, my dear friend, beware +this error! If you meditate the overthrow of this establishment, +call together our companions, state your design, support it with all +your eloquence, but allow them an opportunity of defending themselves." + +"It does not suit me," said Hollingsworth. "Nor is it my duty to do +so." + +"I think it is," replied I. + +Hollingsworth frowned; not in passion, but, like fate, inexorably. + +"I will not argue the point," said he. "What I desire to know of you +is,--and you can tell me in one word,--whether I am to look for your +cooperation in this great scheme of good? Take it up with me! Be my +brother in it! It offers you (what you have told me, over and over +again, that you most need) a purpose in life, worthy of the extremest +self-devotion,--worthy of martyrdom, should God so order it! In this +view, I present it to you. You can greatly benefit mankind. Your +peculiar faculties, as I shall direct them, are capable of being so +wrought into this enterprise that not one of them need lie idle. +Strike hands with me, and from this moment you shall never again feel +the languor and vague wretchedness of an indolent or half-occupied +man. There may be no more aimless beauty in your life; but, in its +stead, there shall be strength, courage, immitigable will,-- +everything that a manly and generous nature should desire! We +shall succeed! We shall have done our best for this miserable world; +and happiness (which never comes but incidentally) will come to us +unawares." + +It seemed his intention to say no more. But, after he had quite +broken off, his deep eyes filled with tears, and he held out both his +hands to me. + +"Coverdale," he murmured, "there is not the man in this wide world +whom I can love as I could you. Do not forsake me!" + +As I look back upon this scene, through the coldness and dimness of +so many years, there is still a sensation as if Hollingsworth had +caught hold of my heart, and were pulling it towards him with an +almost irresistible force. It is a mystery to me how I withstood it. +But, in truth, I saw in his scheme of philanthropy nothing but what +was odious. A loathsomeness that was to be forever in my daily work! +A great black ugliness of sin, which he proposed to collect out of a +thousand human hearts, and that we should spend our lives in an +experiment of + +transmuting it into virtue! Had I but touched his extended hand, +Hollingsworth's magnetism would perhaps have penetrated me with his +own conception of all these matters. But I stood aloof. I fortified +myself with doubts whether his strength of purpose had not been too +gigantic for his integrity, impelling him to trample on +considerations that should have been paramount to every other. + +"Is Zenobia to take a part in your enterprise?" I asked. + +"She is," said Hollingsworth. + +"She!--the beautiful!--the gorgeous!" I exclaimed. "And how have +you prevailed with such a woman to work in this squalid element?" + +"Through no base methods, as you seem to suspect," he answered; "but +by addressing whatever is best and noblest in her." + +Hollingsworth was looking on the ground. But, as he often did so,-- +generally, indeed, in his habitual moods of thought,--I could not +judge whether it was from any special unwillingness now to meet my +eyes. What it was that dictated my next question, I cannot precisely +say. Nevertheless, it rose so inevitably into my mouth, and, as it +were, asked itself so involuntarily, that there must needs have been +an aptness in it. + +"What is to become of Priscilla?" + +Hollingsworth looked at me fiercely, and with glowing eyes. He could +not have shown any other kind of expression than that, had he meant +to strike me with a sword. + +"Why do you bring in the names of these women?" said he, after a +moment of pregnant silence. "What have they to do with the proposal +which I make you? I must have your answer! Will you devote yourself, +and sacrifice all to this great end, and be my friend of friends +forever?" + +"In Heaven's name, Hollingsworth," cried I, getting angry, and glad +to be angry, because so only was it possible to oppose his tremendous +concentrativeness and indomitable will, "cannot you conceive that a +man may wish well to the world, and struggle for its good, on some +other plan than precisely that which you have laid down? And will +you cast off a friend for no unworthiness, but merely because he +stands upon his right as an individual being, and looks at matters +through his own optics, instead of yours?" + +"Be with me," said Hollingsworth, "or be against me! There is no +third choice for you." + +"Take this, then, as my decision," I answered. "I doubt the wisdom +of your scheme. Furthermore, I greatly fear that the methods by +which you allow yourself to pursue it are such as cannot stand the +scrutiny of an unbiassed conscience." + +"And you will not join me?" + +"No!" + +I never said the word--and certainly can never have it to say +hereafter--that cost me a thousandth part so hard an effort as did +that one syllable. The heart-pang was not merely figurative, but an +absolute torture of the breast. I was gazing steadfastly at +Hollingsworth. It seemed to me that it struck him, too, like a +bullet. A ghastly paleness--always so terrific on a swarthy +face--overspread his features. There was a convulsive movement of +his throat, as if he were forcing down some words that struggled and +fought for utterance. Whether words of anger, or words of grief, I +cannot tell; although many and many a time I have vainly tormented +myself with conjecturing which of the two they were. One other +appeal to my friendship,--such as once, already, Hollingsworth had +made,--taking me in the revulsion that followed a strenuous exercise +of opposing will, would completely have subdued me. But he left the +matter there. "Well!" said he. + +And that was all! I should have been thankful for one word more, +even had it shot me through the heart, as mine did him. But he did +not speak it; and, after a few moments, with one accord, we set to +work again, repairing the stone fence. Hollingsworth, I observed, +wrought like a Titan; and, for my own part, I lifted stones which at +this day--or, in a calmer mood, at that one--I should no more have +thought it possible to stir than to carry off the gates of Gaza on my +back. + + + +XVI. LEAVE-TAKINGS + +A few days after the tragic passage-at-arms between Hollingsworth and +me, I appeared at the dinner-table actually dressed in a coat, +instead of my customary blouse; with a satin cravat, too, a white +vest, and several other things that made me seem strange and +outlandish to myself. As for my companions, this unwonted spectacle +caused a great stir upon the wooden benches that bordered either side +of our homely board. + +"What's in the wind now, Miles?" asked one of them. "Are you +deserting us?" + +"Yes, for a week or two," said I. "It strikes me that my health +demands a little relaxation of labor, and a short visit to the +seaside, during the dog-days." + +"You look like it!" grumbled Silas Foster, not greatly pleased with +the idea of losing an efficient laborer before the stress of the +season was well over. "Now, here's a pretty fellow! His shoulders +have broadened a matter of six inches since he came among us; he can +do his day's work, if he likes, with any man or ox on the farm; and +yet he talks about going to the seashore for his health! Well, well, +old woman," added he to his wife, "let me have a plateful of that +pork and cabbage! I begin to feel in a very weakly way. When the +others have had their turn, you and I will take a jaunt to Newport or +Saratoga!" + + +"Well, but, Mr. Foster," said I, "you must allow me to take a little +breath." + +"Breath!" retorted the old yeoman. "Your lungs have the play of a +pair of blacksmith's bellows already. What on earth do you want +more? But go along! I understand the business. We shall never see +your face here again. Here ends the reformation of the world, so far +as Miles Coverdale has a hand in it!" + +"By no means," I replied. "I am resolute to die in the last ditch, +for the good of the cause." + +"Die in a ditch!" muttered gruff Silas, with genuine Yankee +intolerance of any intermission of toil, except on Sunday, the Fourth +of July, the autumnal cattle-show, Thanksgiving, or the annual Fast,-- +"die in a ditch! I believe, in my conscience, you would, if there +were no steadier means than your own labor to keep you out of it!" + +The truth was, that an intolerable discontent and irksomeness had +come over me. Blithedale was no longer what it had been. Everything +was suddenly faded. The sunburnt and arid aspect of our woods and +pastures, beneath the August sky, did but imperfectly symbolize the +lack of dew and moisture, that, since yesterday, as it were, had +blighted my fields of thought, and penetrated to the innermost and +shadiest of my contemplative + +recesses. The change will be recognized by many, who, after a period +of happiness, have endeavored to go on with the same kind of life, in +the same scene, in spite of the alteration or withdrawal of some +principal circumstance. They discover (what heretofore, perhaps, +they had not known) that it was this which gave the bright color and +vivid reality to the whole affair. + +I stood on other terms than before, not only with Hollingsworth, but +with Zenobia and Priscilla. As regarded the two latter, it was that +dreamlike and miserable sort of change that denies you the privilege +to complain, because you can assert no positive injury, nor lay your +finger on anything tangible. It is a matter which you do not see, +but feel, and which, when you try to analyze it, seems to lose its +very existence, and resolve itself into a sickly humor of your own. +Your understanding, possibly, may put faith in this denial. But your +heart will not so easily rest satisfied. It incessantly remonstrates, +though, most of the time, in a bass-note, which you do not +separately distinguish; but, now and then, with a sharp cry, +importunate to be heard, and resolute to claim belief. "Things are +not as they were!" it keeps saying. "You shall not impose on me! I +will never be quiet! I will throb painfully! I will be heavy, and +desolate, and shiver with cold! For I, your deep heart, know when to +be miserable, as once I knew when to be happy! All is changed for us! +You are beloved no more!" And were my life to be spent over again, +I would invariably lend my ear to this Cassandra of the inward depths, +however clamorous the music and the merriment of a more superficial +region. + +My outbreak with Hollingsworth, though never definitely known to our +associates, had really an effect upon the moral atmosphere of the +Community. It was incidental to the closeness of relationship into +which we had brought ourselves, that an unfriendly state of feeling +could not occur between any two members without the whole society +being more or less commoted and made uncomfortable thereby. This +species of nervous sympathy (though a pretty characteristic enough, +sentimentally considered, and apparently betokening an actual bond of +love among us) was yet found rather inconvenient in its practical +operation, mortal tempers being so infirm and variable as they are. +If one of us happened to give his neighbor a box on the ear, the +tingle was immediately felt on the same side of everybody's head. +Thus, even on the supposition that we were far less quarrelsome than +the rest of the world, a great deal of time was necessarily wasted in +rubbing our ears. + +Musing on all these matters, I felt an inexpressible longing for at +least a temporary novelty. I thought of going across the Rocky +Mountains, or to Europe, or up the Nile; of offering myself a +volunteer on the Exploring Expedition; of taking a ramble of years, +no matter in what direction, and coming back on the other side of the +world. Then, should the colonists of Blithedale have established +their enterprise on a permanent basis, I might fling aside my pilgrim +staff and dusty shoon, and rest as peacefully here as elsewhere. Or, +in case Hollingsworth should occupy the ground with his School of +Reform, as he now purposed, I might plead earthly guilt enough, by +that time, to give me what I was inclined to think the only +trustworthy hold on his affections. Meanwhile, before deciding on +any ultimate plan, I determined to remove myself to a little distance, +and take an exterior view of what we had all been about. + +In truth, it was dizzy work, amid such fermentation of opinions as +was going on in the general brain of the Community. It was a kind of +Bedlam, for the time being, although out of the very thoughts that +were wildest and most destructive might grow a wisdom, holy, calm, +and pure, and that should incarnate itself with the substance of a +noble and happy life. But, as matters now were, I felt myself (and, +having a decided tendency towards the actual, I never liked to feel +it) getting quite out of my reckoning, with regard to the existing +state of the world. I was beginning to lose the sense of what kind +of a world it was, among innumerable schemes of what it might or +ought to be. It was impossible, situated as we were, not to imbibe +the idea that everything in nature and human existence was fluid, or +fast becoming so; that the crust of the earth in many places was +broken, and its whole surface portentously upheaving; that it was a +day of crisis, and that we ourselves were in the critical vortex. +Our great globe floated in the atmosphere of infinite space like an +unsubstantial bubble. No sagacious man will long retain his sagacity, +if he live exclusively among reformers and progressive people, +without periodically returning into the settled system of things, to +correct himself by a new observation from that old standpoint. + +It was now time for me, therefore, to go and hold a little talk with +the conservatives, the writers of "The North American Review," the +merchants, the politicians, the Cambridge men, and all those +respectable old blockheads who still, in this intangibility and +mistiness of affairs, kept a death-grip on one or two ideas which had +not come into vogue since yesterday morning. + +The brethren took leave of me with cordial kindness; and as for the +sisterhood, I had serious thoughts of kissing them all round, but +forbore to do so, because, in all such general salutations, the +penance is fully equal to the pleasure. So I kissed none of them; +and nobody, to say the truth, seemed to expect it. + +"Do you wish me," I said to Zenobia, "to announce in town, and at the +watering-places, your purpose to deliver a course of lectures on the +rights of women?" + +"Women possess no rights," said Zenobia, with a half-melancholy smile; +"or, at all events, only little girls and grandmothers would have +the force to exercise them." + +She gave me her hand freely and kindly, and looked at me, I thought, +with a pitying expression in her eyes; nor was there any settled +light of joy in them on her own behalf, but a troubled and passionate +flame, flickering and fitful. + +"I regret, on the whole, that you are leaving us," she said; "and all +the more, since I feel that this phase of our life is finished, and +can never be lived over again. Do you know, Mr. Coverdale, that I +have been several times on the point of making you my confidant, for +lack of a better and wiser one? But you are too young to be my +father confessor; and you would not thank me for treating you like +one of those good little handmaidens who share the bosom secrets of a +tragedy-queen." + +"I would, at least, be loyal and faithful," answered I; "and would +counsel you with an honest purpose, if not wisely." + +"Yes," said Zenobia, "you would be only too wise, too honest. +Honesty and wisdom are such a delightful pastime, at another person's +expense!" + +"Ah, Zenobia," I exclaimed, "if you would but let me speak!" + +"By no means," she replied, "especially when you have just resumed +the whole series of social conventionalisms, together with that +strait-bodied coat. I would as lief open my heart to a lawyer or a +clergyman! No, no, Mr. Coverdale; if I choose a counsellor, in the +present aspect of my affairs, it must be either an angel or a madman; +and I rather apprehend that the latter would be likeliest of the two +to speak the fitting word. It needs a wild steersman when we voyage +through chaos! The anchor is up,--farewell!" + +Priscilla, as soon as dinner was over, had betaken herself into a +corner, and set to work on a little purse. As I approached her, she +let her eyes rest on me with a calm, serious look; for, with all her +delicacy of nerves, there was a singular self-possession in Priscilla, +and her sensibilities seemed to lie sheltered from ordinary +commotion, like the water in a deep well. + +"Will you give me that purse, Priscilla," said I, "as a parting +keepsake?" + +"Yes," she answered, "if you will wait till it is finished." + +"I must not wait, even for that," I replied. "Shall I find you here, +on my return?" + +"I never wish to go away," said she. + +"I have sometimes thought," observed I, smiling, "that you, Priscilla, +are a little prophetess, or, at least, that you have spiritual +intimations respecting matters which are dark to us grosser people. +If that be the case, I should like to ask you what is about to happen; +for I am tormented with a strong foreboding that, were I to return +even so soon as to-morrow morning, I should find everything changed. +Have you any impressions of this nature?" + +"Ah, no," said Priscilla, looking at me apprehensively. "If any such +misfortune is coming, the shadow has not reached me yet. Heaven +forbid! I should be glad if there might never be any change, but one +summer follow another, and all just like this." + +"No summer ever came back, and no two summers ever were alike," said +I, with a degree of Orphic wisdom that astonished myself. "Times +change, and people change; and if our hearts do not change as readily, +so much the worse for us. Good-by, Priscilla!" + +I gave her hand a pressure, which, I think, she neither resisted nor +returned. Priscilla's heart was deep, but of small compass; it had +room but for a very few dearest ones, among whom she never reckoned +me. + +On the doorstep I met Hollingsworth. I had a momentary impulse to +hold out my hand, or at least to give a parting nod, but resisted +both. When a real and strong affection has come to an end, it is not +well to mock the sacred past with any show of those commonplace +civilities that belong to ordinary intercourse. Being dead +henceforth to him, and he to me, there could be no propriety in our +chilling one another with the touch of two corpse-like hands, or +playing at looks of courtesy with eyes that were impenetrable beneath +the glaze and the film. We passed, therefore, as if mutually +invisible. + +I can nowise explain what sort of whim, prank, or perversity it was, +that, after all these leave-takings, induced me to go to the pigsty, +and take leave of the swine! There they lay, buried as deeply among +the straw as they could burrow, four huge black grunters, the very +symbols of slothful ease and sensual comfort. They were asleep, +drawing short and heavy breaths, which heaved their big sides up and +down. Unclosing their eyes, however, at my approach, they looked +dimly forth at the outer world, and simultaneously uttered a gentle +grunt; not putting themselves to the trouble of an additional breath +for that particular purpose, but grunting with their ordinary +inhalation. They were involved, and almost stifled and buried alive, +in their own corporeal substance. The very unreadiness and +oppression wherewith these greasy citizens gained breath enough to +keep their life-machinery in sluggish movement appeared to make them +only the more sensible of the ponderous and fat satisfaction of their +existence. Peeping at me an instant out of their small, red, hardly +perceptible eyes, they dropt asleep again; yet not so far asleep but +that their unctuous bliss was still present to them, betwixt dream +and reality. + +"You must come back in season to eat part of a spare-rib," said Silas +Foster, giving my hand a mighty squeeze. "I shall have these fat +fellows hanging up by the heels, heads downward, pretty soon, I tell +you!" + +"O cruel Silas, what a horrible idea!" cried I. "All the rest of us, +men, women, and livestock, save only these four porkers, are +bedevilled with one grief or another; they alone are happy,--and you +mean to cut their throats and eat them! It would be more for the +general comfort to let them eat us; and bitter and sour morsels we +should be!" + + + +XVII. THE HOTEL + +Arriving in town (where my bachelor-rooms, long before this time, had +received some other occupant), I established myself, for a day or two, +in a certain, respectable hotel. It was situated somewhat aloof +from my former track in life; my present mood inclining me to avoid +most of my old companions, from whom I was now sundered by other +interests, and who would have been likely enough to amuse themselves +at the expense of the amateur workingman. The hotel-keeper put me +into a back room of the third story of his spacious establishment. +The day was lowering, with occasional gusts of rain, and an ugly +tempered east wind, which seemed to come right off the chill and +melancholy sea, hardly mitigated by sweeping over the roofs, and +amalgamating itself with the dusky element of city smoke. All the +effeminacy of past days had returned upon me at once. Summer as it +still was, I ordered a coal fire in the rusty grate, and was glad to +find myself growing a little too warm with an artificial temperature. + +My sensations were those of a traveller, long sojourning in remote +regions, and at length sitting down again amid customs once familiar. +There was a newness and an oldness oddly combining themselves into +one impression. It made me acutely sensible how strange a piece of +mosaic-work had lately been wrought into my life. True, if you look +at it in one way, it had been only a summer in the country. But, +considered in a profounder relation, it was part of another age, a +different state of society, a segment of an existence peculiar in its +aims and methods, a leaf of some mysterious volume interpolated into +the current history which time was writing off. At one moment, the +very circumstances now surrounding me--my coal fire and the dingy +room in the bustling hotel--appeared far off and intangible; the next +instant Blithedale looked vague, as if it were at a distance both in +time and space, and so shadowy that a question might be raised +whether the whole affair had been anything more than the thoughts of +a speculative man. I had never before experienced a mood that so +robbed the actual world of its solidity. It nevertheless involved a +charm, on which--a devoted epicure of my own emotions--I resolved to +pause, and enjoy the moral sillabub until quite dissolved away. + +Whatever had been my taste for solitude and natural scenery, yet the +thick, foggy, stifled element of cities, the entangled life of many +men together, sordid as it was, and empty of the beautiful, took +quite as strenuous a hold upon my mind. I felt as if there could +never be enough of it. Each characteristic sound was too suggestive +to be passed over unnoticed. Beneath and around me, I heard the stir +of the hotel; the loud voices of guests, landlord, or bar-keeper; +steps echoing on the staircase; the ringing of a bell, announcing +arrivals or departures; the porter lumbering past my door with +baggage, which he thumped down upon the floors of neighboring +chambers; the lighter feet of chambermaids scudding along the +passages;--it is ridiculous to think what an interest they had for me! +From the street came the tumult of the pavements, pervading the +whole house with a continual uproar, so broad and deep that only an +unaccustomed ear would dwell upon it. A company of the city soldiery, +with a full military band, marched in front of the hotel, invisible +to me, but stirringly audible both by its foot-tramp and the clangor +of its instruments. Once or twice all the city bells jangled +together, announcing a fire, which brought out the engine-men and +their machines, like an army with its artillery rushing to battle. +Hour by hour the clocks in many steeples responded one to another. + +In some public hall, not a great way off, there seemed to be an +exhibition of a mechanical diorama; for three times during the day +occurred a repetition of obstreperous music, winding up with the +rattle of imitative cannon and musketry, and a huge final explosion. +Then ensued the applause of the spectators, with clap of hands and +thump of sticks, and the energetic pounding of their heels. All this +was just as valuable, in its way, as the sighing of the breeze among +the birch-trees that overshadowed Eliot's pulpit. + +Yet I felt a hesitation about plunging into this muddy tide of human +activity and pastime. It suited me better, for the present, to +linger on the brink, or hover in the air above it. So I spent the +first day, and the greater part of the second, in the laziest manner +possible, in a rocking-chair, inhaling the fragrance of a series of +cigars, with my legs and slippered feet horizontally disposed, and in +my hand a novel purchased of a railroad bibliopolist. The gradual +waste of my cigar accomplished itself with an easy and gentle +expenditure of breath. My book was of the dullest, yet had a sort of +sluggish flow, like that of a stream in which your boat is as often +aground as afloat. Had there been a more impetuous rush, a more +absorbing passion of the narrative, I should the sooner have +struggled out of its uneasy current, and have given myself up to the +swell and subsidence of my thoughts. But, as it was, the torpid life +of the book served as an unobtrusive accompaniment to the life within +me and about me. At intervals, however, when its effect grew a +little too soporific,--not for my patience, but for the possibility +of keeping my eyes open, I bestirred myself, started from the +rocking-chair, and looked out of the window. + +A gray sky; the weathercock of a steeple that rose beyond the +opposite range of buildings, pointing from the eastward; a sprinkle +of small, spiteful-looking raindrops on the window-pane. In that +ebb-tide of my energies, had I thought of venturing abroad, these +tokens would have checked the abortive purpose. + +After several such visits to the window, I found myself getting +pretty well acquainted with that little portion of the backside of +the universe which it presented to my view. Over against the hotel +and its adjacent houses, at the distance of forty or fifty yards, was +the rear of a range of buildings which appeared to be spacious, +modern, and calculated for fashionable residences. The interval +between was apportioned into grass-plots, and here and there an +apology for a garden, pertaining severally to these dwellings. There +were apple-trees, and pear and peach trees, too, the fruit on which +looked singularly large, luxuriant, and abundant, as well it might, +in a situation so warm and sheltered, and where the soil had +doubtless been enriched to a more than natural fertility. In two or +three places grapevines clambered upon trellises, and bore clusters +already purple, and promising the richness of Malta or Madeira in +their ripened juice. The blighting winds of our rigid climate could +not molest these trees and vines; the sunshine, though descending +late into this area, and too early intercepted by the height of the +surrounding houses, yet lay tropically there, even when less than +temperate in every other region. Dreary as was the day, the scene +was illuminated by not a few sparrows and other birds, which spread +their wings, and flitted and fluttered, and alighted now here, now +there, and busily scratched their food out of the wormy earth. Most +of these winged people seemed to have their domicile in a robust and +healthy buttonwood-tree. It aspired upward, high above the roofs of +the houses, and spread a dense head of foliage half across the area. + +There was a cat--as there invariably is in such places--who evidently +thought herself entitled to the privileges of forest life in this +close heart of city conventionalisms. I watched her creeping along +the low, flat roofs of the offices, descending a flight of wooden +steps, gliding among the grass, and besieging the buttonwood-tree, +with murderous purpose against its feathered citizens. But, after +all, they were birds of city breeding, and doubtless knew how to +guard themselves against the peculiar perils of their position. + +Bewitching to my fancy are all those nooks and crannies where Nature, +like a stray partridge, hides her head among the long-established +haunts of men! It is likewise to be remarked, as a general rule, +that there is far more of the picturesque, more truth to native and +characteristic tendencies, and vastly greater suggestiveness in the +back view of a residence, whether in town or country, than in its +front. The latter is always artificial; it is meant for the world's +eye, and is therefore a veil and a concealment. Realities keep in +the rear, and put forward an advance guard of show and humbug. The +posterior aspect of any old farmhouse, behind which a railroad has +unexpectedly been opened, is so different from that looking upon the +immemorial highway, that the spectator gets new ideas of rural life +and individuality in the puff or two of steam-breath which shoots him +past the premises. In a city, the distinction between what is +offered to the public and what is kept for the family is certainly +not less striking. + +But, to return to my window at the back of the hotel. Together with +a due contemplation of the fruit-trees, the grapevines, the +buttonwood-tree, the cat, the birds, and many other particulars, I +failed not to study the row of fashionable dwellings to which all +these appertained. Here, it must be confessed, there was a general +sameness. From the upper story to the first floor, they were so much +alike, that I could only conceive of the inhabitants as cut out on +one identical pattern, like little wooden toy-people of German +manufacture. One long, united roof, with its thousands of slates +glittering in the rain, extended over the whole. After the +distinctness of separate characters to which I had recently been +accustomed, it perplexed and annoyed me not to be able to resolve +this combination of human interests into well-defined elements. It +seemed hardly worth while for more than one of those families to be +in existence, since they all had the same glimpse of the sky, all +looked into the same area, all received just their equal share of +sunshine through the front windows, and all listened to precisely the +same noises of the street on which they boarded. Men are so much +alike in their nature, that they grow intolerable unless varied by +their circumstances. + +Just about this time a waiter entered my room. The truth was, I had +rung the bell and ordered a sherry-cobbler. + + +"Can you tell me," I inquired, "what families reside in any of those +houses opposite?" + +"The one right opposite is a rather stylish boarding-house," said the +waiter. "Two of the gentlemen boarders keep horses at the stable of +our establishment. They do things in very good style, sir, the +people that live there." + +I might have found out nearly as much for myself, on examining the +house a little more closely, in one of the upper chambers I saw a +young man in a dressing-gown, standing before the glass and brushing +his hair for a quarter of an hour together. He then spent an equal +space of time in the elaborate arrangement of his cravat, and finally +made his appearance in a dress-coat, which I suspected to be newly +come from the tailor's, and now first put on for a dinner-party. At +a window of the next story below, two children, prettily dressed, +were looking out. By and by a middle-aged gentleman came softly +behind them, kissed the little girl, and playfully pulled the little +boy's ear. It was a papa, no doubt, just come in from his +counting-room or office; and anon appeared mamma, stealing as softly +behind papa as he had stolen behind the children, and laying her hand +on his shoulder to surprise him. Then followed a kiss between papa +and mamma; but a noiseless one, for the children did not turn their +heads. + +"I bless God for these good folks!" thought I to myself. "I have not +seen a prettier bit of nature, in all my summer in the country, than +they have shown me here, in a rather stylish boarding-house. I will +pay them a little more attention by and by." + +On the first floor, an iron balustrade ran along in front of the tall +and spacious windows, evidently belonging to a back drawing-room; and +far into the interior, through the arch of the sliding-doors, I could +discern a gleam from the windows of the front apartment. There were +no signs of present occupancy in this suite of rooms; the curtains +being enveloped in a protective covering, which allowed but a small +portion of their crimson material to be seen. But two housemaids +were industriously at work; so that there was good prospect that the +boarding-house might not long suffer from the absence of its most +expensive and profitable guests. Meanwhile, until they should appear, +I cast my eyes downward to the lower regions. There, in the dusk +that so early settles into such places, I saw the red glow of the +kitchen range. The hot cook, or one of her subordinates, with a +ladle in her hand, came to draw a cool breath at the back door. As +soon as she disappeared, an Irish man-servant, in a white jacket, +crept slyly forth, and threw away the fragments of a china dish, +which, unquestionably, he had just broken. Soon afterwards, a lady, +showily dressed, with a curling front of what must have been false +hair, and reddish-brown, I suppose, in hue,--though my remoteness +allowed me only to guess at such particulars,--this respectable +mistress of the boarding-house made a momentary transit across the +kitchen window, and appeared no more. It was her final, +comprehensive glance, in order to make sure that soup, fish, and +flesh were in a proper state of readiness, before the serving up of +dinner. + +There was nothing else worth noticing about the house, unless it be +that on the peak of one of the dormer windows which opened out of the +roof sat a dove, looking very dreary and forlorn; insomuch that I +wondered why she chose to sit there, in the chilly rain, while her +kindred were doubtless nestling in a warm and comfortable dove-cote. +All at once this dove spread her wings, and, launching herself in the +air, came flying so straight across the intervening space, that I +fully expected her to alight directly on my window-sill. In the +latter part of her course, however, she swerved aside, flew upward, +and vanished, as did, likewise, the slight, fantastic pathos with +which I had invested her. + + + +XVIII. THE BOARDING-HOUSE + +The next day, as soon as I thought of looking again towards the +opposite house, there sat the dove again, on the peak of the same +dormer window! It was by no means an early hour, for the preceding +evening I had ultimately mustered enterprise enough to visit the +theatre, had gone late to bed, and slept beyond all limit, in my +remoteness from Silas Foster's awakening horn. Dreams had tormented +me throughout the night. The train of thoughts which, for months +past, had worn a track through my mind, and to escape which was one +of my chief objects in leaving Blithedale, kept treading +remorselessly to and fro in their old footsteps, while slumber left +me impotent to regulate them. It was not till I had quitted my three +friends that they first began to encroach upon my dreams. In those +of the last night, Hollingsworth and Zenobia, standing on either side +of my bed, had bent across it to exchange a kiss of passion. +Priscilla, beholding this,--for she seemed to be peeping in at the +chamber window,--had melted gradually away, and left only the sadness +of her expression in my heart. There it still lingered, after I +awoke; one of those unreasonable sadnesses that you know not how to +deal with, because it involves nothing for common-sense to clutch. + +It was a gray and dripping forenoon; gloomy enough in town, and still +gloomier in the haunts to which my recollections persisted in +transporting me. For, in spite of my efforts to think of something +else, I thought how the gusty rain was drifting over the slopes and +valleys of our farm; how wet must be the foliage that overshadowed +the pulpit rock; how cheerless, in such a day, my hermitage--the +tree-solitude of my owl-like humors--in the vine-encircled heart of +the tall pine! It was a phase of homesickness. I had wrenched +myself too suddenly out of an accustomed sphere. There was no choice, +now, but to bear the pang of whatever heartstrings were snapt +asunder, and that illusive torment (like the ache of a limb long ago +cut off) by which a past mode of life prolongs itself into the +succeeding one. I was full of idle and shapeless regrets. The +thought impressed itself upon me that I had left duties unperformed. +With the power, perhaps, to act in the place of destiny and avert +misfortune from my friends, I had resigned them to their fate. That +cold tendency, between instinct and intellect, which made me pry with +a speculative interest into people's passions and impulses, appeared +to have gone far towards unhumanizing my heart. + +But a man cannot always decide for himself whether his own heart is +cold or warm. It now impresses me that, if I erred at all in regard +to Hollingsworth, Zenobia, and Priscilla, it was through too much +sympathy, rather than too little. + +To escape the irksomeness of these meditations, I resumed my post at +the window. At first sight, there was nothing new to be noticed. +The general aspect of affairs was the same as yesterday, except that +the more decided inclemency of to-day had driven the sparrows to +shelter, and kept the cat within doors; whence, however, she soon +emerged, pursued by the cook, and with what looked like the better +half of a roast chicken in her mouth. The young man in the +dress-coat was invisible; the two children, in the story below, +seemed to be romping about the room, under the superintendence of a +nursery-maid. The damask curtains of the drawing-room, on the first +floor, were now fully displayed, festooned gracefully from top to +bottom of the windows, which extended from the ceiling to the carpet. +A narrower window, at the left of the drawing-room, gave light to +what was probably a small boudoir, within which I caught the faintest +imaginable glimpse of a girl's figure, in airy drapery. Her arm was +in regular movement, as if she were busy with her German worsted, or +some other such pretty and unprofitable handiwork. + +While intent upon making out this girlish shape, I became sensible +that a figure had appeared at one of the windows of the drawing-room. +There was a presentiment in my mind; or perhaps my first glance, +imperfect and sidelong as it was, had sufficed to convey subtile +information of the truth. At any rate, it was with no positive +surprise, but as if I had all along expected the incident, that, +directing my eyes thitherward, I beheld--like a full-length picture, +in the space between the heavy festoons of the window curtains--no +other than Zenobia! At the same instant, my thoughts made sure of +the identity of the figure in the boudoir. It could only be +Priscilla. + +Zenobia was attired, not in the almost rustic costume which she had +heretofore worn, but in a fashionable morning-dress. There was, +nevertheless, one familiar point. She had, as usual, a flower in her +hair, brilliant and of a rare variety, else it had not been Zenobia. +After a brief pause at the window, she turned away, exemplifying, in +the few steps that removed her out of sight, that noble and beautiful +motion which characterized her as much as any other personal charm. +Not one woman in a thousand could move so admirably as Zenobia. Many +women can sit gracefully; some can stand gracefully; and a few, +perhaps, can assume a series of graceful positions. But natural +movement is the result and expression of the whole being, and cannot +be well and nobly performed unless responsive to something in the +character. I often used to think that music--light and airy, wild +and passionate, or the full harmony of stately marches, in accordance +with her varying mood--should have attended Zenobia's footsteps. + +I waited for her reappearance. It was one peculiarity, +distinguishing Zenobia from most of her sex, that she needed for her +moral well-being, and never would forego, a large amount of physical +exercise. At Blithedale, no inclemency of sky or muddiness of earth +had ever impeded her daily walks. Here in town, she probably +preferred to tread the extent of the two drawing-rooms, and measure +out the miles by spaces of forty feet, rather than bedraggle her +skirts over the sloppy pavements. Accordingly, in about the time +requisite to pass through the arch of the sliding-doors to the front +window, and to return upon her steps, there she stood again, between +the festoons of the crimson curtains. But another personage was now +added to the scene. Behind Zenobia appeared that face which I had +first encountered in the wood-path; the man who had passed, side by +side with her, in such mysterious familiarity and estrangement, +beneath my vine curtained hermitage in the tall pine-tree. It was +Westervelt. And though he was looking closely over her shoulder, it +still seemed to me, as on the former occasion, that Zenobia repelled +him,--that, perchance, they mutually repelled each other, by some +incompatibility of their spheres. + +This impression, however, might have been altogether the result of +fancy and prejudice in me. The distance was so great as to +obliterate any play of feature by which I might otherwise have been +made a partaker of their counsels. + +There now needed only Hollingsworth and old Moodie to complete the +knot of characters, whom a real intricacy of events, greatly assisted +by my method of insulating them from other relations, had kept so +long upon my mental stage, as actors in a drama. In itself, perhaps, +it was no very remarkable event that they should thus come across me, +at the moment when + +I imagined myself free. Zenobia, as I well knew, had retained an +establishment in town, and had not unfrequently withdrawn herself +from Blithedale during brief intervals, on one of which occasions she +had taken Priscilla along with her. Nevertheless, there seemed +something fatal in the coincidence that had borne me to this one spot, +of all others in a great city, and transfixed me there, and +compelled me again to waste my already wearied sympathies on affairs +which were none of mine, and persons who cared little for me. It +irritated my nerves; it affected me with a kind of heart-sickness. +After the effort which it cost me to fling them off,--after +consummating my escape, as I thought, from these goblins of flesh and +blood, and pausing to revive myself with a breath or two of an +atmosphere in which they should have no share,--it was a positive +despair to find the same figures arraying themselves before me, and +presenting their old problem in a shape that made it more insoluble +than ever. + +I began to long for a catastrophe. If the noble temper of +Hollingsworth's soul were doomed to be utterly corrupted by the too +powerful purpose which had grown out of what was noblest in him; if +the rich and generous qualities of Zenobia's womanhood might not save +her; if Priscilla must perish by her tenderness and faith, so simple +and so devout, then be it so! Let it all come! As for me, I would +look on, as it seemed my part to do, understandingly, if my intellect +could fathom the meaning and the moral, and, at all events, +reverently and sadly. The curtain fallen, I would pass onward with +my poor individual life, which was now attenuated of much of its +proper substance, and diffused among many alien interests. + +Meanwhile, Zenobia and her companion had retreated from the window. +Then followed an interval, during which I directed my eves towards +the figure in the boudoir. Most certainly it was Priscilla, although +dressed with a novel and fanciful elegance. The vague perception of +it, as viewed so far off, impressed me as if she had suddenly passed +out of a chrysalis state and put forth wings. Her hands were not now +in motion. She had dropt her work, and sat with her head thrown back, +in the same attitude that I had seen several times before, when she +seemed to be listening to an imperfectly distinguished sound. + +Again the two figures in the drawing-room became visible. They were +now a little withdrawn from the window, face to face, and, as I could +see by Zenobia's emphatic gestures, were discussing some subject in +which she, at least, felt a passionate concern. By and by she broke +away, and vanished beyond my ken. Westervelt approached the window, +and leaned his forehead against a pane of glass, displaying the sort +of smile on his handsome features which, when I before met him, had +let me into the secret of his gold-bordered teeth. Every human being, +when given over to the Devil, is sure to have the wizard mark upon +him, in one form or another. I fancied that this smile, with its +peculiar revelation, was the Devil's signet on the Professor. + +This man, as I had soon reason to know, was endowed with a cat-like +circumspection; and though precisely the most unspiritual quality in +the world, it was almost as effective as spiritual insight in making +him acquainted with whatever it suited him to discover. He now +proved it, considerably to my discomfiture, by detecting and +recognizing me, at my post of observation. Perhaps I ought to have +blushed at being caught in such an evident scrutiny of Professor +Westervelt and his affairs. Perhaps I did blush. Be that as it +might, I retained presence of mind enough not to make my position yet +more irksome by the poltroonery of drawing back. + +Westervelt looked into the depths of the drawing-room, and beckoned. +Immediately afterwards Zenobia appeared at the window, with color +much heightened, and eyes which, as my conscience whispered me, were +shooting bright arrows, barbed with scorn, across the intervening +space, directed + +full at my sensibilities as a gentleman. If the truth must be told, +far as her flight-shot was, those arrows hit the mark. She signified +her recognition of me by a gesture with her head and hand, comprising +at once a salutation and dismissal. The next moment she administered +one of those pitiless rebukes which a woman always has at hand, ready +for any offence (and which she so seldom spares on due occasion), by +letting down a white linen curtain between the festoons of the damask +ones. It fell like the drop-curtain of a theatre, in the interval +between the acts. + +Priscilla had disappeared from the boudoir. But the dove still kept +her desolate perch on the peak of the attic window. + + + +XIX. ZENOBIA'S DRAWING-ROOM + +The remainder of the day, so far as I was concerned, was spent in +meditating on these recent incidents. I contrived, and alternately +rejected, innumerable methods of accounting for the presence of +Zenobia and Priscilla, and the connection of Westervelt with both. +It must be owned, too, that I had a keen, revengeful sense of the +insult inflicted by Zenobia's scornful recognition, and more +particularly by her letting down the curtain; as if such were the +proper barrier to be interposed between a character like hers and a +perceptive faculty like mine. For, was mine a mere vulgar curiosity? +Zenobia should have known me better than to suppose it. She should +have been able to appreciate that quality of the intellect and the +heart which impelled me (often against my own will, and to the +detriment of my own comfort) to live in other lives, and to +endeavor--by generous sympathies, by delicate intuitions, by taking +note of things too slight for record, and by bringing my human spirit +into manifold accordance with the companions whom God assigned me--to +learn the secret which was hidden even from themselves. + +Of all possible observers, methought a woman like Zenobia and a man +like Hollingsworth should have selected me. And now when the event +has long been past, I retain the same opinion of my fitness for the +office. True, I might have condemned them. Had I been judge as well +as witness, my sentence might have been stern as that of destiny +itself. But, still, no trait of original nobility of character, no +struggle against temptation,--no iron necessity of will, on the one +hand, nor extenuating circumstance to be derived from passion and +despair, on the other,--no remorse that might coexist with error, +even if powerless to prevent it,--no proud repentance that should +claim retribution as a meed,--would go unappreciated. True, again, I +might give my full assent to the punishment which was sure to follow. +But it would be given mournfully, and with undiminished love. And, +after all was finished, I would come as if to gather up the white +ashes of those who had perished at the stake, and to tell the +world--the wrong being now atoned for--how much had perished there +which it had never yet known how to praise. + +I sat in my rocking-chair, too far withdrawn from the window to +expose myself to another rebuke like that already inflicted. My eyes +still wandered towards the opposite house, but without effecting any +new discoveries. Late in the afternoon, the weathercock on the +church spire indicated a change of wind; the sun shone dimly out, as +if the golden wine of its beams were mingled half-and-half with water. +Nevertheless, they kindled up the whole range of edifices, threw a +glow over the windows, glistened on the wet roofs, and, slowly +withdrawing upward, perched upon the chimney-tops; thence they took a +higher flight, and lingered an instant on the tip of the spire, +making it the final point of more cheerful light in the whole sombre +scene. The next moment, it was all gone. The twilight fell into the +area like a shower of dusky snow, and before it was quite dark, the +gong of the hotel summoned me to tea. + +When I returned to my chamber, the glow of an astral lamp was +penetrating mistily through the white curtain of Zenobia's +drawing-room. The shadow of a passing figure was now and then cast +upon this medium, but with too vague an outline for even my +adventurous conjectures to read the hieroglyphic that it presented. + +All at once, it occurred to me how very absurd was my behavior in +thus tormenting myself with crazy hypotheses as to what was going on +within that drawing-room, when it was at my option to be personally +present there, My relations with Zenobia, as yet unchanged,--as a +familiar friend, and associated in the same life-long enterprise,-- +gave me the right, and made it no more than kindly courtesy +demanded, to call on her. Nothing, except our habitual independence +of conventional rules at Blithedale, could have kept me from sooner +recognizing this duty. At all events, it should now be performed. + +In compliance with this sudden impulse, I soon found myself actually +within the house, the rear of which, for two days past, I had been so +sedulously watching. A servant took my card, and, immediately +returning, ushered me upstairs. On the way, I heard a rich, and, as +it were, triumphant burst of music from a piano, in which I felt +Zenobia's character, although heretofore I had known nothing of her +skill upon the instrument. Two or three canary-birds, excited by +this gush of sound, sang piercingly, and did their utmost to produce +a kindred melody. A bright illumination streamed through, the door +of the front drawing-room; and I had barely stept across the +threshold before Zenobia came forward to meet me, laughing, and with +an extended hand. + +"Ah, Mr. Coverdale," said she, still smiling, but, as I thought, with +a good deal of scornful anger underneath, "it has gratified me to see +the interest which you continue to take in my affairs! I have long +recognized you as a sort of transcendental Yankee, with all the +native propensity of your countrymen to investigate matters that come +within their range, but rendered almost poetical, in your case, by +the refined methods which you adopt for its gratification. After all, +it was an unjustifiable stroke, on my part,--was it not?--to let +down the window curtain!" + +"I cannot call it a very wise one," returned I, with a secret +bitterness, which, no doubt, Zenobia appreciated. "It is really +impossible to hide anything in this world, to say nothing of the next. +All that we ought to ask, therefore, is, that the witnesses of our +conduct, and the speculators on our motives, should be capable of +taking the highest view which the circumstances of the case may admit. +So much being secured, I, for one, would be most happy in feeling +myself followed everywhere by an indefatigable human sympathy." + +"We must trust for intelligent sympathy to our guardian angels, if +any there be," said Zenobia. "As long as the only spectator of my +poor tragedy is a young man at the window of his hotel, I must still +claim the liberty to drop the curtain." + +While this passed, as Zenobia's hand was extended, I had applied the +very slightest touch of my fingers to her own. In spite of an +external freedom, her manner made me sensible that we stood upon no +real terms of confidence. The thought came sadly across me, how +great was the contrast betwixt this interview and our first meeting. +Then, in the warm light of the country fireside, Zenobia had greeted +me cheerily and hopefully, with a full sisterly grasp of the hand, +conveying as much kindness in it as other women could have evinced by +the pressure of both arms around my neck, or by yielding a cheek to +the brotherly salute. The difference was as complete as between her +appearance at that time--so simply attired, and with only the one +superb flower in her hair--and now, when her beauty was set off by +all that dress and ornament could do for it. And they did much. Not, +indeed, that they created or added anything to what Nature had +lavishly done for Zenobia. But, those costly robes which she had on, +those flaming jewels on her neck, served as lamps to display the +personal advantages which required nothing less than such an +illumination to be fully seen. Even her characteristic flower, +though it seemed to be still there, had undergone a cold and bright +transfiguration; it was a flower exquisitely imitated in jeweller's +work, and imparting the last touch that transformed Zenobia into a +work of art. + +"I scarcely feel," I could not forbear saying, "as if we had ever met +before. How many years ago it seems since we last sat beneath +Eliot's pulpit, with Hollingsworth extended on the fallen leaves, and +Priscilla at his feet! Can it be, Zenobia, that you ever really +numbered yourself with our little band of earnest, thoughtful, +philanthropic laborers?" + +"Those ideas have their time and place," she answered coldly. "But I +fancy it must be a very circumscribed mind that can find room for no +other." + +Her manner bewildered me. Literally, moreover, I was dazzled by the +brilliancy of the room. A chandelier hung down in the centre, +glowing with I know not how many lights; there were separate lamps, +also, on two or three tables, and on marble brackets, adding their +white radiance to that of the chandelier. The furniture was +exceedingly rich. Fresh from our old farmhouse, with its homely +board and benches in the dining-room, and a few wicker chairs in the +best parlor, it struck me that here was the fulfilment of every +fantasy of an imagination revelling in various methods of costly +self-indulgence and splendid ease. Pictures, marbles, vases,--in +brief, more shapes of luxury than there could be any object in +enumerating, except for an auctioneer's advertisement,--and the whole +repeated and doubled by the reflection of a great mirror, which +showed me Zenobia's proud figure, likewise, and my own. It cost me, +I acknowledge, a bitter sense of shame, to perceive in myself a +positive effort to bear up against the effect which Zenobia sought to +impose on me. I reasoned against her, in my secret mind, and strove +so to keep my footing. In the gorgeousness with which she had +surrounded herself,--in the redundance of personal ornament, which +the largeness of her physical nature and the rich type of her beauty +caused to seem so suitable,--I malevolently beheld the true character +of the woman, passionate, luxurious, lacking simplicity, not deeply +refined, incapable of pure and perfect taste. But, the next instant, +she was too powerful for all my opposing struggles. I saw how fit it +was that she should make herself as gorgeous as she pleased, and +should do a thousand things that would have been ridiculous in the +poor, thin, weakly characters of other women. To this day, however, +I hardly know whether I then beheld Zenobia in her truest attitude, +or whether that were the truer one in which she had presented herself +at Blithedale. In both, there was something like the illusion which +a great actress flings around her. + +"Have you given up Blithedale forever?" I inquired. + +"Why should you think so?" asked she. + +"I cannot tell," answered I; "except that it appears all like a dream +that we were ever there together." + +"It is not so to me," said Zenobia. "I should think it a poor and +meagre nature that is capable of but one set of forms, and must +convert all the past into a dream merely because the present happens +to be unlike it. Why should we be content with our homely life of a +few months past, to the exclusion of all other modes? It was good; +but there are other lives as good, or better. Not, you will +understand, that I condemn those who give themselves up to it more +entirely than I, for myself, should deem it wise to do." + +It irritated me, this self-complacent, condescending, qualified +approval and criticism of a system to which many individuals--perhaps +as highly endowed as our gorgeous Zenobia--had contributed their all +of earthly endeavor, and their loftiest aspirations. I determined to +make proof if there were any spell that would exorcise her out of the +part which she seemed to be acting. She should be compelled to give +me a glimpse of something true; some nature, some passion, no matter +whether right or wrong, provided it were real. + +"Your allusion to that class of circumscribed characters who can live +only in one mode of life," remarked I coolly, "reminds me of our poor +friend Hollingsworth. Possibly he was in your thoughts when you +spoke thus. Poor fellow! It is a pity that, by the fault of a +narrow education, he should have so completely immolated himself to +that one idea of his, especially as the slightest modicum of +common-sense would teach him its utter impracticability. Now that I +have returned into the world, and can look at his project from a +distance, it requires quite all my real regard for this respectable +and well-intentioned man to prevent me laughing at him,--as I find +society at large does." + +Zenobia's eyes darted lightning, her cheeks flushed, the vividness of +her expression was like the effect of a powerful light flaming up +suddenly within her. My experiment had fully succeeded. She had +shown me the true flesh and blood of her heart, by thus involuntarily +resenting my slight, pitying, half-kind, half-scornful mention of the +man who was all in all with her. She herself probably felt this; for +it was hardly a moment before she tranquillized her uneven breath, +and seemed as proud and self-possessed as ever. + +"I rather imagine," said she quietly, "that your appreciation falls +short of Mr. Hollingsworth's just claims. Blind enthusiasm, +absorption in one idea, I grant, is generally ridiculous, and must be +fatal to the respectability of an ordinary man; it requires a very +high and powerful character to make it otherwise. But a great +man--as, perhaps, you do not know--attains his normal condition only +through the inspiration of one great idea. As a friend of Mr. +Hollingsworth, and, at the same time, a calm observer, I must tell +you that he seems to me such a man. But you are very pardonable for +fancying him ridiculous. Doubtless, he is so--to you! There can be +no truer test of the noble and heroic, in any individual, than the +degree in which he possesses the faculty of distinguishing heroism +from absurdity." + +I dared make no retort to Zenobia's concluding apothegm. In truth, I +admired her fidelity. It gave me a new sense of Hollingsworth's +native power, to discover that his influence was no less potent with +this beautiful woman here, in the midst of artificial life, than it +had been at the foot of the gray rock, and among the wild birch-trees +of the wood-path, when she so passionately pressed his hand against +her heart. The great, rude, shaggy, swarthy man! And Zenobia loved +him! + +"Did you bring Priscilla with you?" I resumed. "Do you know I have +sometimes fancied it not quite safe, considering the susceptibility +of her temperament, that she should be so constantly within the +sphere of a man like Hollingsworth. Such tender and delicate natures, +among your sex, have often, I believe, a very adequate appreciation +of the heroic element in men. But then, again, I should suppose them +as likely as any other women to make a reciprocal impression. +Hollingsworth could hardly give his affections to a person capable of +taking an independent stand, but only to one whom he might absorb +into himself. He has certainly shown great tenderness for Priscilla." + +Zenobia had turned aside. But I caught the reflection of her face in +the mirror, and saw that it was very pale,--as pale, in her rich +attire, as if a shroud were round her. + +"Priscilla is here," said she, her voice a little lower than usual. +"Have not you learnt as much from your chamber window? Would you +like to see her?" + +She made a step or two into the back drawing-room, and called,-- +"Priscilla! Dear Priscilla!" + + + +XX. THEY VANISH + +Priscilla immediately answered the summons, and made her appearance +through the door of the boudoir. I had conceived the idea, which I +now recognized as a very foolish one, that Zenobia would have taken +measures to debar me from an interview with this girl, between whom +and herself there was so utter an opposition of their dearest +interests, that, on one part or the other, a great grief, if not +likewise a great wrong, seemed a matter of necessity. But, as +Priscilla was only a leaf floating on the dark current of events, +without influencing them by her own choice or plan, as she probably +guessed not whither the stream was bearing her, nor perhaps even felt +its inevitable movement,--there could be no peril of her +communicating to me any intelligence with regard to Zenobia's +purposes. + +On perceiving me, she came forward with great quietude of manner; and +when I held out my hand, her own moved slightly towards it, as if +attracted by a feeble degree of magnetism. + +"I am glad to see you, my dear Priscilla," said I, still holding her +hand; "but everything that I meet with nowadays makes me wonder +whether I am awake. You, especially, have always seemed like a +figure in a dream, and now more than ever." + +"Oh, there is substance in these fingers of mine," she answered, +giving my hand the faintest possible pressure, and then taking away +her own. "Why do you call me a dream? Zenobia is much more like one +than I; she is so very, very beautiful! And, I suppose," added +Priscilla, as if thinking aloud, "everybody sees it, as I do." + +But, for my part, it was Priscilla's beauty, not Zenobia's, of which +I was thinking at that moment. She was a person who could be quite +obliterated, so far as beauty went, by anything unsuitable in her +attire; her charm was not positive and material enough to bear up +against a mistaken choice of color, for instance, or fashion. It was +safest, in her case, to attempt no art of dress; for it demanded the +most perfect taste, or else the happiest accident in the world, to +give her precisely the adornment which she needed. She was now +dressed in pure white, set off with some kind of a gauzy fabric, +which--as I bring up her figure in my memory, with a faint gleam on +her shadowy hair, and her dark eyes bent shyly on mine, through all +the vanished years--seems to be floating about her like a mist. I +wondered what Zenobia meant by evolving so much loveliness out of +this poor girl. It was what few women could afford to do; for, as I +looked from one to the other, the sheen and splendor of Zenobia's +presence took nothing from Priscilla's softer spell, if it might not +rather be thought to add to it. + +"What do you think of her?" asked Zenobia. + +I could not understand the look of melancholy kindness with which +Zenobia regarded her. She advanced a step, and beckoning Priscilla +near her, kissed her cheek; then, with a slight gesture of repulse, +she moved to the other side of the room. I followed. + +"She is a wonderful creature," I said. "Ever since she came among us, +I have been dimly sensible of just this charm which you have brought +out. But it was never absolutely visible till now. She is as lovely +as a flower!" + +"Well, say so if you like," answered Zenobia. "You are a poet,--at +least, as poets go nowadays,--and must be allowed to make an +opera-glass of your imagination, when you look at women. I wonder, +in such Arcadian freedom of falling in love as we have lately enjoyed, +it never occurred to you to fall in love with Priscilla. In society, +indeed, a genuine American never dreams of stepping across the +inappreciable air-line which separates one class from another. But +what was rank to the colonists of Blithedale?" + +"There were other reasons," I replied, "why I should have +demonstrated myself an ass, had I fallen in love with Priscilla. By +the bye, has Hollingsworth ever seen her in this dress?" + +"Why do you bring up his name at every turn?" asked Zenobia in an +undertone, and with a malign look which wandered from my face to +Priscilla's. "You know not what you do! It is dangerous, sir, +believe me, + +to tamper thus with earnest human passions, out of your own mere +idleness, and for your sport. I will endure it no longer! Take care +that it does not happen again! I warn you!" + +"You partly wrong me, if not wholly," I responded. "It is an +uncertain sense of some duty to perform, that brings my thoughts, and +therefore my words, continually to that one point." + +"Oh, this stale excuse of duty!" said Zenobia, in a whisper so full +of scorn that it penetrated me like the hiss of a serpent. "I have +often heard it before, from those who sought to interfere with me, +and I know precisely what it signifies. Bigotry; self-conceit; an +insolent curiosity; a meddlesome temper; a cold-blooded criticism, +founded on a shallow interpretation of half-perceptions; a monstrous +scepticism in regard to any conscience or any wisdom, except one's +own; a most irreverent propensity to thrust Providence aside, and +substitute one's self in its awful place,--out of these, and other +motives as miserable as these, comes your idea of duty! But, beware, +sir! With all your fancied acuteness, you step blindfold into these +affairs. For any mischief that may follow your interference, I hold +you responsible!" + +It was evident that, with but a little further provocation, the +lioness would turn to bay; if, indeed, such were not her attitude +already. I bowed, and not very well knowing what else to do, was +about to withdraw. But, glancing again towards Priscilla, who had +retreated into a corner, there fell upon my heart an intolerable +burden of despondency, the purport of which I could not tell, but +only felt it to bear reference to her. I approached and held out my +hand; a gesture, however, to which she made no response. It was +always one of her peculiarities that she seemed to shrink from even +the most friendly touch, unless it were Zenobia's or Hollingsworth's. +Zenobia, all this while, stood watching us, but with a careless +expression, as if it mattered very little what might pass. + +"Priscilla," I inquired, lowering my voice, "when do you go back to +Blithedale?" + +"Whenever they please to take me," said she. + +"Did you come away of your own free will?" I asked. + +"I am blown about like a leaf," she replied. "I never have any free +will." + +"Does Hollingsworth know that you are here?" said I. + +"He bade me come," answered Priscilla. + +She looked at me, I thought, with an air of surprise, as if the idea +were incomprehensible that she should have taken this step without +his agency. + +"What a gripe this man has laid upon her whole being!" muttered I +between my teeth. + +"Well, as Zenobia so kindly intimates, I have no more business here. +I wash my hands of it all. On Hollingsworth's head be the +consequences! Priscilla," I added aloud, "I know not that ever we +may meet again. Farewell!" + +As I spoke the word, a carriage had rumbled along the street, and +stopt before the house. The doorbell rang, and steps were +immediately afterwards heard on the staircase. Zenobia had thrown a +shawl over her dress. + +"Mr. Coverdale," said she, with cool courtesy, "you will perhaps +excuse us. We have an engagement, and are going out." + +"Whither?" I demanded. + +"Is not that a little more than you are entitled to inquire?" said +she, with a smile. "At all events, it does not suit me to tell you." + +The door of the drawing-room opened, and Westervelt appeared. I +observed that he was elaborately dressed, as if for some grand +entertainment. My dislike for this man was infinite. At that moment +it amounted to nothing less than a creeping of the flesh, as when, +feeling about in a dark place, one touches something cold and slimy, +and questions what the secret hatefulness may be. And still I could +not but acknowledge that, for personal beauty, for polish of manner, +for all that externally befits a gentleman, there was hardly another +like him. After bowing to Zenobia, and graciously saluting Priscilla +in her corner, he recognized me by a slight but courteous inclination. + +"Come, Priscilla," said Zenobia; "it is time. Mr. Coverdale, +good-evening." + +As Priscilla moved slowly forward, I met her in the middle of the +drawing-room. + +"Priscilla," said I, in the hearing of them all, "do you know whither +you are going?" + +"I do not know," she answered. + +"Is it wise to go, and is it your choice to go?" I asked. "If not, +I am your friend, and Hollingsworth's friend. Tell me so, at once." + +"Possibly," observed Westervelt, smiling, "Priscilla sees in me an +older friend than either Mr. Coverdale or Mr. Hollingsworth. I shall +willingly leave the matter at her option." + +While thus speaking, he made a gesture of kindly invitation, and +Priscilla passed me, with the gliding movement of a sprite, and took +his offered arm. He offered the other to Zenobia; but she turned her +proud and beautiful face upon him with a look which--judging from +what I caught of it in profile--would undoubtedly have smitten the +man dead, had he possessed any heart, or had this glance attained to +it. It seemed to rebound, however, from his courteous visage, like +an arrow from polished steel. They all three descended the stairs; +and when I likewise reached the street door, the carriage was already +rolling away. + + + +XXI. AN OLD ACQUAINTANCE + +Thus excluded from everybody's confidence, and attaining no further, +by my most earnest study, than to an uncertain sense of something +hidden from me, it would appear reasonable that I should have flung +off all these alien perplexities. Obviously, my best course was to +betake myself to new scenes. Here I was only an intruder. Elsewhere +there might be circumstances in which I could establish a personal +interest, and people who would respond, with a portion of their +sympathies, for so much as I should bestow of mine. + +Nevertheless, there occurred to me one other thing to be done. +Remembering old Moodie, and his relationship with Priscilla, I +determined to seek an interview, for the purpose of ascertaining +whether the knot of affairs was as inextricable on that side as I +found it on all others. Being tolerably well acquainted with the old +man's haunts, I went, the next day, to the saloon of a certain +establishment about which he often lurked. It was a reputable place +enough, affording good entertainment in the way of meat, drink, and +fumigation; and there, in my young and idle days and nights, when I +was neither nice nor wise, I had often amused myself with watching +the staid humors and sober jollities of the thirsty souls around me. + +At my first entrance, old Moodie was not there. The more patiently +to await him, I lighted a cigar, and establishing myself in a corner, +took a quiet, and, by sympathy, a boozy kind of pleasure in the +customary life that was going forward. The saloon was fitted up with +a good deal of taste. There were pictures on the walls, and among +them an oil-painting of a beefsteak, with such an admirable show of +juicy tenderness, that the beholder sighed to think it merely +visionary, and incapable of ever being put upon a gridiron. Another +work of high art was the lifelike representation of a noble sirloin; +another, the hindquarters of a deer, retaining the hoofs and tawny +fur; another, the head and shoulders of a salmon; and, still more +exquisitely finished, a brace of canvasback ducks, in which the +mottled feathers were depicted with the accuracy of a daguerreotype. +Some very hungry painter, I suppose, had wrought these subjects of +still-life, heightening his imagination with his appetite, and +earning, it is to be hoped, the privilege of a daily dinner off +whichever of his pictorial viands he liked best. + +Then there was a fine old cheese, in which you could almost discern +the mites; and some sardines, on a small plate, very richly done, +and looking as if oozy with the oil in which they had been smothered. +All these things were so perfectly imitated, that you seemed to have +the genuine article before you, and yet with an indescribable, ideal +charm; it took away the grossness from what was fleshiest and fattest, +and thus helped the life of man, even in its earthliest relations, to +appear rich and noble, as well as warm, cheerful, and substantial. +There were pictures, too, of gallant revellers, those of the old time, +Flemish, apparently, with doublets and slashed sleeves, drinking +their wine out of fantastic, long-stemmed glasses; quaffing joyously, +quaffing forever, with inaudible laughter and song; while the +champagne bubbled immortally against their moustaches, or the purple +tide of Burgundy ran inexhaustibly down their throats. + +But, in an obscure corner of the saloon, there was a little Picture +excellently done, moreover of a ragged, bloated, New England toper, +stretched out on a bench, in the heavy, apoplectic sleep of +drunkenness. The death-in-life was too well portrayed. You smelt +the fumy liquor that had brought on this syncope. Your only comfort +lay in the forced reflection, that, real as he looked, the poor +caitiff was but imaginary, a bit of painted canvass, whom no delirium +tremens, nor so much as a retributive headache, awaited, on the +morrow. + +By this time, it being past eleven o'clock, the two bar-keepers of +the saloon were in pretty constant activity. One of these young men +had a rare faculty in the concoction of gin-cocktails. It was a +spectacle to behold, how, with a tumbler in each hand, he tossed the +contents from one to the other. Never conveying it awry, nor +spilling the least drop, he compelled the frothy liquor, as it seemed +to me, to spout forth from one glass and descend into the other, in a +great parabolic curve, as well-defined and calculable as a planet's +orbit. He had a good forehead, with a particularly large development +just above the eyebrows; fine intellectual gifts, no doubt, which he +had educated to this profitable end; being famous for nothing but +gin-cocktails, and commanding a fair salary by his one accomplishment. +These cocktails, and other artificial combinations of liquor, (of +which there were at least a score, though mostly, I suspect, +fantastic in their differences,) were much in favor with the younger +class of customers, who, at farthest, had only reached the second +stage of potatory life. The staunch, old soakers, on the other hand +men who, if put on tap, would have yielded a red alcoholic liquor, by +way of blood usually confined themselves to plain brandy-and-water, +gin, or West India rum; and, oftentimes, they prefaced their dram +with some medicinal remark as to the wholesomeness and stomachic +qualities of that particular drink. Two or three appeared to have +bottles of their own behind the counter; and, winking one red eye to +the bar-keeper, he forthwith produced these choicest and peculiar +cordials, which it was a matter of great interest and favor, among +their acquaintances, to obtain a sip of. + +Agreeably to the Yankee habit, under whatever circumstances, the +deportment of all these good fellows, old or young, was decorous and +thoroughly correct. They grew only the more sober in their cups; +there was no confused babble nor boisterous laughter. They sucked in +the joyous fire of the decanters and kept it smouldering in their +inmost recesses, with a bliss known only to the heart which it warmed +and comforted. Their eyes twinkled a little, to be sure; they hemmed +vigorously after each glass, and laid a hand upon the pit of the +stomach, as if the pleasant titillation there was what constituted +the tangible part of their enjoyment. In that spot, unquestionably, +and not in the brain, was the acme of the whole affair. But the true +purpose of their drinking--and one that will induce men to drink, or +do something equivalent, as long as this weary world shall +endure--was the renewed youth and vigor, the brisk, cheerful sense of +things present and to come, with which, for about a quarter of an +hour, the dram permeated their systems. And when such quarters of an +hour can be obtained in some mode less baneful to the great sum of a +man's life,--but, nevertheless, with a little spice of impropriety, +to give it a wild flavor,--we temperance people may ring out our +bells for victory! + +The prettiest object in the saloon was a tiny fountain, which threw +up its feathery jet through the counter, and sparkled down again into +an oval basin, or lakelet, containing several goldfishes. There was +a bed of bright sand at the bottom, strewn with coral and rock-work; +and the fishes went gleaming about, now turning up the sheen of a +golden side, and now vanishing into the shadows of the water, like +the fanciful thoughts that coquet with a poet in his dream. Never +before, I imagine, did a company of water-drinkers remain so entirely +uncontaminated by the bad example around them; nor could I help +wondering that it had not occurred to any freakish inebriate to empty +a glass of liquor into their lakelet. What a delightful idea! Who +would not be a fish, if he could inhale jollity with the essential +element of his existence! + +I had begun to despair of meeting old Moodie, when, all at once, I +recognized his hand and arm protruding from behind a screen that was +set up for the accommodation of bashful topers. As a matter of +course, he had one of Priscilla's little purses, and was quietly +insinuating it under the notice of a person who stood near. This was +always old Moodie's way. You hardly ever saw him advancing towards +you, but became aware of his proximity without being able to guess +how he had come thither. He glided about like a spirit, assuming +visibility close to your elbow, offering his petty trifles of +merchandise, remaining long enough for you to purchase, if so +disposed, and then taking himself off, between two breaths, while you +happened to be thinking of something else. + +By a sort of sympathetic impulse that often controlled me in those +more impressible days of my life, I was induced to approach this old +man in a mode as undemonstrative as his own. Thus, when, according +to his custom, he was probably just about to vanish, he found me at +his elbow. + +"Ah!" said he, with more emphasis than was usual with him. "It is Mr. +Coverdale!" + +"Yes, Mr. Moodie, your old acquaintance," answered I. "It is some +time now since we ate luncheon together at Blithedale, and a good +deal longer since our little talk together at the street corner." + +"That was a good while ago," said the old man. + +And he seemed inclined to say not a word more. His existence looked +so colorless and torpid,--so very faintly shadowed on the canvas of +reality,--that I was half afraid lest he should altogether disappear, +even while my eyes were fixed full upon his figure. He was certainly +the wretchedest old ghost in the world, with his crazy hat, the dingy +handkerchief about his throat, his suit of threadbare gray, and +especially that patch over his right eye, behind which he always +seemed to be hiding himself. There was one method, however, of +bringing him out into somewhat stronger relief. A glass of brandy +would effect it. Perhaps the gentler influence of a bottle of claret +might do the same. Nor could I think it a matter for the recording +angel to write down against me, if--with my painful consciousness of +the frost in this old man's blood, and the positive ice that had +congealed about his heart--I should thaw him out, were it only for an +hour, with the summer warmth of a little wine. What else could +possibly be done for him? How else could he be imbued with energy +enough to hope for a happier state hereafter? How else be inspired +to say his prayers? For there are states of our spiritual system +when the throb of the soul's life is too faint and weak to render us +capable of religious aspiration. + +"Mr. Moodie," said I, "shall we lunch together? And would you like +to drink a glass of wine?" + +His one eye gleamed. He bowed; and it impressed me that he grew to +be more of a man at once, either in anticipation of the wine, or as a +grateful response to my good fellowship in offering it. + +"With pleasure," he replied. + +The bar-keeper, at my request, showed us into a private room, and +soon afterwards set some fried oysters and a bottle of claret on the +table; and I saw the old man glance curiously at the label of the +bottle, as if to learn the brand. + +"It should be good wine," I remarked, "if it have any right to its +label." + +"You cannot suppose, sir," said Moodie, with a sigh, "that a poor old +fellow like me knows any difference in wines." + +And yet, in his way of handling the glass, in his preliminary snuff +at the aroma, in his first cautious sip of the wine, and the +gustatory skill with which he gave his palate the full advantage of +it, it was impossible not to recognize the connoisseur. + +"I fancy, Mr. Moodie," said I, "you are a much better judge of wines +than I have yet learned to be. Tell me fairly,--did you never drink +it where the grape grows?" + +"How should that have been, Mr. Coverdale?" answered old Moodie shyly; +but then he took courage, as it were, and uttered a feeble little +laugh. "The flavor of this wine," added he, "and its perfume still +more than its taste, makes me remember that I was once a young man." + +"I wish, Mr. Moodie," suggested I,--not that I greatly cared about it, +however, but was only anxious to draw him into some talk about +Priscilla and Zenobia,--"I wish, while we sit over our wine, you +would favor me with a few of those youthful reminiscences." + +"Ah," said he, shaking his head, "they might interest you more than +you suppose. But I had better be silent, Mr. Coverdale. If this +good wine,--though claret, I suppose, is not apt to play such a trick,-- +but if it should make my tongue run too freely, I could never look +you in the face again." + +"You never did look me in the face, Mr. Moodie," I replied, "until +this very moment." + +"Ah!" sighed old Moodie. + +It was wonderful, however, what an effect the mild grape-juice +wrought upon him. It was not in the wine, but in the associations +which it seemed to bring up. Instead of the mean, slouching, furtive, +painfully depressed air of an old city vagabond, more like a gray +kennel-rat than any other living thing, he began to take the aspect +of a decayed gentleman. Even his garments--especially after I had +myself quaffed a glass or two--looked less shabby than when we first +sat down. There was, by and by, a certain exuberance and +elaborateness of gesture and manner, oddly in contrast with all that +I had hitherto seen of him. Anon, with hardly any impulse from me, +old Moodie began to talk. His communications referred exclusively to +a long-past and more fortunate period of his life, with only a few +unavoidable allusions to the circumstances that had reduced him to +his present state. But, having once got the clew, my subsequent +researches acquainted me with the main facts of the following +narrative; although, in writing it out, my pen has perhaps allowed +itself a trifle of romantic and legendary license, worthier of a +small poet than of a grave biographer. + + + +XXII. FAUNTLEROY + +Five-and-twenty years ago, at the epoch of this story, there dwelt in +one of the Middle States a man whom we shall call Fauntleroy; a man +of wealth, and magnificent tastes, and prodigal expenditure. His +home might almost be styled a palace; his habits, in the ordinary +sense, princely. His whole being seemed to have crystallized itself +into an external splendor, wherewith he glittered in the eyes of the +world, and had no other life than upon this gaudy surface. He had +married a lovely woman, whose nature was deeper than his own. But +his affection for her, though it showed largely, was superficial, +like all his other manifestations and developments; he did not so +truly keep this noble creature in his heart, as wear her beauty for +the most brilliant ornament of his outward state. And there was born +to him a child, a beautiful daughter, whom he took from the +beneficent hand of God with no just sense of her immortal value, but +as a man already rich in gems would receive another jewel. If he +loved her, it was because she shone. + +After Fauntleroy had thus spent a few empty years, coruscating +continually an unnatural light, the source of it--which was merely +his gold--began to grow more shallow, and finally became exhausted. +He saw himself in imminent peril of losing all that had heretofore +distinguished him; and, conscious of no innate worth to fall back +upon, he recoiled from this calamity with the instinct of a soul +shrinking from annihilation. To avoid it,--wretched man!--or rather +to defer it, if but for a month, a day, or only to procure himself +the life of a few breaths more amid the false glitter which was now +less his own than ever,--he made himself guilty of a crime. It was +just the sort of crime, growing out of its artificial state, which +society (unless it should change its entire constitution for this +man's unworthy sake) neither could nor ought to pardon. More safely +might it pardon murder. Fauntleroy's guilt was discovered. He fled; +his wife perished, by the necessity of her innate nobleness, in its +alliance with a being so ignoble; and betwixt her mother's death and +her father's ignominy, his daughter was left worse than orphaned. + +There was no pursuit after Fauntleroy. His family connections, who +had great wealth, made such arrangements with those whom he had +attempted to wrong as secured him from the retribution that would +have overtaken an unfriended criminal. The wreck of his estate was +divided among his creditors: His name, in a very brief space, was +forgotten by the multitude who had passed it so diligently from mouth +to mouth. Seldom, indeed, was it recalled, even by his closest +former intimates. Nor could it have been otherwise. The man had +laid no real touch on any mortal's heart. Being a mere image, an +optical delusion, created by the sunshine of prosperity, it was his +law to vanish into the shadow of the first intervening cloud. He +seemed to leave no vacancy; a phenomenon which, like many others that +attended his brief career, went far to prove the illusiveness of his +existence. + +Not, however, that the physical substance of Fauntleroy had literally +melted into vapor. He had fled northward to the New England +metropolis, and had taken up his abode, under another name, in a +squalid street or court of the older portion of the city. There he +dwelt among poverty-stricken wretches, sinners, and forlorn good +people, Irish, and whomsoever else were neediest. Many families were +clustered in each house together, above stairs and below, in the +little peaked garrets, and even in the dusky cellars. The house +where Fauntleroy paid weekly rent for a chamber and a closet had been +a stately habitation in its day. An old colonial governor had built +it, and lived there, long ago, and held his levees in a great room +where now slept twenty Irish bedfellows; and died in Fauntleroy's +chamber, which his embroidered and white-wigged ghost still haunted. +Tattered hangings, a marble hearth, traversed with many cracks and +fissures, a richly carved oaken mantelpiece, partly hacked away for +kindling-stuff, a stuccoed ceiling, defaced with great, unsightly +patches of the naked laths,--such was the chamber's aspect, as if, +with its splinters and rags of dirty splendor, it were a kind of +practical gibe at this poor, ruined man of show. + +At first, and at irregular intervals, his relatives allowed +Fauntleroy a little pittance to sustain life; not from any love, +perhaps, but lest poverty should compel him, by new offences, to add +more shame to that with which he had already stained them. But he +showed no tendency to further guilt. His character appeared to have +been radically changed (as, indeed, from its shallowness, it well +might) by his miserable fate; or, it may be, the traits now seen in +him were portions of the same character, presenting itself in another +phase. Instead of any longer seeking to live in the sight of the +world, his impulse was to shrink into the nearest obscurity, and to +be unseen of men, were it possible, even while standing before their +eyes. He had no pride; it was all trodden in the dust. No +ostentation; for how could it survive, when there was nothing left of +Fauntleroy, save penury and shame! His very gait demonstrated that +he would gladly have faded out of view, and have crept about +invisibly, for the sake of sheltering himself from the irksomeness of +a human glance. Hardly, it was averred, within the memory of those +who knew him now, had he the hardihood to show his full front to the +world. He skulked in corners, and crept about in a sort of noonday +twilight, making himself gray and misty, at all hours, with his +morbid intolerance of sunshine. + +In his torpid despair, however, he had done an act which that +condition of the spirit seems to prompt almost as often as prosperity +and hope. Fauntleroy was again married. He had taken to wife a +forlorn, meek-spirited, feeble young woman, a seamstress, whom he +found dwelling with her mother in a contiguous chamber of the old +gubernatorial residence. This poor phantom--as the beautiful and +noble companion of his former life had done brought him a daughter. +And sometimes, as from one dream into another, Fauntleroy looked +forth out of his present grimy environment into that past +magnificence, and wondered whether the grandee of yesterday or the +pauper of to-day were real. But, in my mind, the one and the other +were alike impalpable. In truth, it was Fauntleroy's fatality to +behold whatever he touched dissolve. After a few years, his second +wife (dim shadow that she had always been) faded finally out of the +world, and left Fauntleroy to deal as he might with their pale and +nervous child. And, by this time, among his distant relatives,--with +whom he had grown a weary thought, linked with contagious infamy, and +which they were only too willing to get rid of,--he was himself +supposed to be no more. + +The younger child, like his elder one, might be considered as the +true offspring of both parents, and as the reflection of their state. +She was a tremulous little creature, shrinking involuntarily from +all mankind, but in timidity, and no sour repugnance. There was a +lack of human substance in her; it seemed as if, were she to stand up +in a sunbeam, it would pass right through her figure, and trace out +the cracked and dusty window-panes upon the naked floor. But, +nevertheless, the poor child had a heart; and from her mother's +gentle character she had inherited a profound and still capacity of +affection. And so her life was one of love. She bestowed it partly +on her father, but in greater part on an idea. + +For Fauntleroy, as they sat by their cheerless fireside,--which was +no fireside, in truth, but only a rusty stove,--had often talked to +the little girl about his former wealth, the noble loveliness of his +first wife, and the beautiful child whom she had given him. Instead +of the fairy tales which other parents tell, he told Priscilla this. +And, out of the loneliness of her sad little existence, Priscilla's +love grew, and tended upward, and twined itself perseveringly around +this unseen sister; as a grapevine might strive to clamber out of a +gloomy hollow among the rocks, and embrace a young tree standing in +the sunny warmth above. It was almost like worship, both in its +earnestness and its humility; nor was it the less humble--though the +more earnest--because Priscilla could claim human kindred with the +being whom she, so devoutly loved. As with worship, too, it gave her +soul the refreshment of a purer atmosphere. Save for this singular, +this melancholy, and yet beautiful affection, the child could hardly +have lived; or, had she lived, with a heart shrunken for lack of any +sentiment to fill it, she must have yielded to the barren miseries of +her position, and have grown to womanhood characterless and worthless. +But now, amid all the sombre coarseness of her father's outward +life, and of her own, Priscilla had a higher and imaginative life +within. Some faint gleam thereof was often visible upon her face. +It was as if, in her spiritual visits to her brilliant sister, a +portion of the latter's brightness had permeated our dim Priscilla, +and still lingered, shedding a faint illumination through the +cheerless chamber, after she came back. + +As the child grew up, so pallid and so slender, and with much +unaccountable nervousness, and all the weaknesses of neglected +infancy still haunting her, the gross and simple neighbors whispered +strange things about Priscilla. The big, red, Irish matrons, whose +innumerable progeny swarmed out of the adjacent doors, used to mock +at the pale Western child. They fancied--or, at least, affirmed it, +between jest and earnest--that she was not so solid flesh and blood +as other children, but mixed largely with a thinner element. They +called her ghost-child, and said that she could indeed vanish when +she pleased, but could never, in her densest moments, make herself +quite visible. The sun at midday would shine through her; in the +first gray of the twilight, she lost all the distinctness of her +outline; and, if you followed the dim thing into a dark corner, +behold! she was not there. And it was true that Priscilla had +strange ways; strange ways, and stranger words, when she uttered any +words at all. Never stirring out of the old governor's dusky house, +she sometimes talked of distant places and splendid rooms, as if she +had just left them. Hidden things were visible to her (at least so +the people inferred from obscure hints escaping unawares out of her +mouth), and silence was audible. And in all the world there was +nothing so difficult to be endured, by those who had any dark secret +to conceal, as the glance of Priscilla's timid and melancholy eyes. + +Her peculiarities were the theme of continual gossip among the other +inhabitants of the gubernatorial mansion. The rumor spread thence +into a wider circle. Those who knew old Moodie, as he was now called, +used often to jeer him, at the very street-corners, about his +daughter's gift of second-sight and prophecy. It was a period when +science (though mostly through its empirical professors) was bringing +forward, anew, a hoard of facts and imperfect theories, that had +partially won credence in elder times, but which modern scepticism +had swept away as rubbish. These things were now tossed up again, +out of the surging ocean of human thought and experience. The story +of Priscilla's preternatural manifestations, therefore, attracted a +kind of notice of which it would have been deemed wholly unworthy a +few years earlier. One day a gentleman ascended the creaking +staircase, and inquired which was old Moodie's chamber door. And, +several times, he came again. He was a marvellously handsome man,-- +still youthful, too, and fashionably dressed. Except that +Priscilla, in those days, had no beauty, and, in the languor of her +existence, had not yet blossomed into womanhood, there would have +been rich food for scandal in these visits; for the girl was +unquestionably their sole object, although her father was supposed +always to be present. But, it must likewise be added, there was +something about Priscilla that calumny could not meddle with; and +thus far was she privileged, either by the preponderance of what was +spiritual, or the thin and watery blood that left her cheek so pallid. + +Yet, if the busy tongues of the neighborhood spared Priscilla in one +way, they made themselves amends by renewed and wilder babble on +another score. They averred that the strange gentleman was a wizard, +and that he had taken advantage of Priscilla's lack of earthly +substance to subject her to himself, as his familiar spirit, through +whose medium he gained cognizance of whatever happened, in regions +near or remote. The boundaries of his power were defined by the +verge of the pit of Tartarus on the one hand, and the third sphere of +the celestial world on the other. Again, they declared their +suspicion that the wizard, with all his show of manly beauty, was +really an aged and wizened figure, or else that his semblance of a +human body was only a necromantic, or perhaps a mechanical +contrivance, in which a demon walked about. In proof of it, however, +they could merely instance a gold band around his upper teeth, which +had once been visible to several old women, when he smiled at them +from the top of the governor's staircase. Of course this was all +absurdity, or mostly so. But, after every possible deduction, there +remained certain very mysterious points about the stranger's +character, as well as the connection that he established with +Priscilla. Its nature at that period was even less understood than +now, when miracles of this kind have grown so absolutely stale, that +I would gladly, if the truth allowed, dismiss the whole matter from +my narrative. + +We must now glance backward, in quest of the beautiful daughter of +Fauntleroy's prosperity. What had become of her? Fauntleroy's only +brother, a bachelor, and with no other relative so near, had adopted +the forsaken child. She grew up in affluence, with native graces +clustering luxuriantly about her. In her triumphant progress towards +womanhood, she was adorned with every variety of feminine +accomplishment. But she lacked a mother's care. With no adequate +control, on any hand (for a man, however stern, however wise, can +never sway and guide a female child), her character was left to shape +itself. There was good in it, and evil. Passionate, self-willed, +and imperious, she had a warm and generous nature; showing the +richness of the soil, however, chiefly by the weeds that flourished +in it, and choked up the herbs of grace. In her girlhood her uncle +died. As Fauntleroy was supposed to be likewise dead, and no other +heir was known to exist, his wealth devolved on her, although, dying +suddenly, the uncle left no will. After his death there were obscure +passages in Zenobia's history. There were whispers of an attachment, +and even a secret marriage, with a fascinating and accomplished but +unprincipled young man. The incidents and appearances, however, +which led to this surmise soon passed away, and were forgotten. + +Nor was her reputation seriously affected by the report. In fact, so +great was her native power and influence, and such seemed the +careless purity of her nature, that whatever Zenobia did was +generally acknowledged as right for her to do. The world never +criticised her so harshly as it does most women who transcend its +rules. It almost yielded its assent, when it beheld her stepping out +of the common path, and asserting the more extensive privileges of +her sex, both theoretically and by her practice. The sphere of +ordinary womanhood was felt to be narrower than her development +required. + +A portion of Zenobia's more recent life is told in the foregoing +pages. Partly in earnest,--and, I imagine, as was her disposition, +half in a proud jest, or in a kind of recklessness that had grown +upon her, out of some hidden grief,--she had given her countenance, +and promised liberal pecuniary aid, to our experiment of a better +social state. And Priscilla followed her to Blithedale. The sole +bliss of her life had been a dream of this beautiful sister, who had +never so much as known of her existence. By this time, too, the poor +girl was enthralled in an intolerable bondage, from which she must +either free herself or perish. She deemed herself safest near +Zenobia, into whose large heart she hoped to nestle. + +One evening, months after Priscilla's departure, when Moodie (or +shall we call him Fauntleroy?) was sitting alone in the state-chamber +of the old governor, there came footsteps up the staircase. There +was a pause on the landing-place. A lady's musical yet haughty +accents were heard making an inquiry from some denizen of the house, +who had thrust a head out of a contiguous chamber. There was then a +knock at Moodie's door. "Come in!" said he. + +And Zenobia entered. The details of the interview that followed +being unknown to me,--while, notwithstanding, it would be a pity +quite to lose the picturesqueness of the situation,--I shall attempt +to sketch it, mainly from fancy, although with some general grounds +of surmise in regard to the old man's feelings. + +She gazed wonderingly at the dismal chamber. Dismal to her, who +beheld it only for an instant; and how much more so to him, into +whose brain each bare spot on the ceiling, every tatter of the +paper-hangings, and all the splintered carvings of the mantelpiece, +seen wearily through long years, had worn their several prints! +Inexpressibly miserable is this familiarity with objects that have +been from the first disgustful. + +"I have received a strange message," said Zenobia, after a moment's +silence, "requesting, or rather enjoining it upon me, to come hither. +Rather from curiosity than any other motive,--and because, though a +woman, I have not all the timidity of one,--I have complied. Can it +be you, sir, who thus summoned me?" + +"It was," answered Moodie. + +"And what was your purpose?" she continued. "You require charity, +perhaps? In that case, the message might have been more fitly worded. +But you are old and poor, and age and poverty should be allowed +their privileges. Tell me, therefore, to what extent you need my aid." + +"Put up your purse," said the supposed mendicant, with an +inexplicable smile. "Keep it,--keep all your wealth,--until I demand +it all, or none! My message had no such end in view. You are +beautiful, they tell me; and I desired to look at you." + +He took the one lamp that showed the discomfort and sordidness of his +abode, and approaching Zenobia held it up, so as to gain the more +perfect view of her, from top to toe. So obscure was the chamber, +that you could see the reflection of her diamonds thrown upon the +dingy wall, and flickering with the rise and fall of Zenobia's breath. +It was the splendor of those jewels on her neck, like lamps that +burn before some fair temple, and the jewelled flower in her hair, +more than the murky, yellow light, that helped him to see her beauty. +But he beheld it, and grew proud at heart; his own figure, in spite +of his mean habiliments, assumed an air of state and grandeur. + +"It is well," cried old Moodie. "Keep your wealth. You are right +worthy of it. Keep it, therefore, but with one condition only." + +Zenobia thought the old man beside himself, and was moved with pity. + +"Have you none to care for you?" asked she. "No daughter?--no +kind-hearted neighbor?--no means of procuring the attendance which +you need? Tell me once again, can I do nothing for you?" + +"Nothing," he replied. "I have beheld what I wished. Now leave me. +Linger not a moment longer, or I may be tempted to say what would +bring a cloud over that queenly brow. Keep all your wealth, but with +only this one condition: Be kind--be no less kind than sisters +are--to my poor Priscilla!" + +And, it may be, after Zenobia withdrew, Fauntleroy paced his gloomy +chamber, and communed with himself as follows,--or, at all events, it +is the only solution which I can offer of the enigma presented in his +character:--"I am unchanged,--the same man as of yore!" said he. +"True, my brother's wealth--he dying intestate--is legally my own. I +know it; yet of my own choice, I live a beggar, and go meanly clad, +and hide myself behind a forgotten ignominy. Looks this like +ostentation? Ah! but in Zenobia I live again! Beholding her, so +beautiful,--so fit to be adorned with all imaginable splendor of +outward state,--the cursed vanity, which, half a lifetime since, +dropt off like tatters of once gaudy apparel from my debased and +ruined person, is all renewed for her sake. Were I to reappear, my +shame would go with me from darkness into daylight. Zenobia has the +splendor, and not the shame. Let the world admire her, and be +dazzled by her, the brilliant child of my prosperity! It is +Fauntleroy that still shines through her!" But then, perhaps, +another thought occurred to him. + +"My poor Priscilla! And am I just to her, in surrendering all to +this beautiful Zenobia? Priscilla! I love her best,--I love her +only!--but with shame, not pride. So dim, so pallid, so shrinking,-- +the daughter of my long calamity! Wealth were but a mockery in +Priscilla's hands. What is its use, except to fling a golden +radiance around those who grasp it? Yet let Zenobia take heed! +Priscilla shall have no wrong!" But, while the man of show thus +meditated,--that very evening, so far as I can adjust the dates of +these strange incidents,--Priscilla poor, pallid flower!--was either +snatched from Zenobia's hand, or flung wilfully away! + + + +XXIII. A VILLAGE HALL + +Well, I betook myself away, and wandered up and down, like an +exorcised spirit that had been driven from its old haunts after a +mighty struggle. It takes down the solitary pride of man, beyond +most other things, to find the impracticability of flinging aside +affections that have grown irksome. The bands that were silken once +are apt to become iron fetters when we desire to shake them off. Our +souls, after all, are not our own. We convey a property in them to +those with whom we associate; but to what extent can never be known, +until we feel the tug, the agony, of our abortive effort to resume an +exclusive sway over ourselves. Thus, in all the weeks of my absence, +my thoughts continually reverted back, brooding over the bygone +months, and bringing up incidents that seemed hardly to have left a +trace of themselves in their passage. I spent painful hours in +recalling these trifles, and rendering them more misty and +unsubstantial than at first by the quantity of speculative musing +thus kneaded in with them. Hollingsworth, Zenobia, Priscilla! These +three had absorbed my life into themselves. Together with an +inexpressible longing to know their fortunes, there was likewise a +morbid resentment of my own pain, and a stubborn reluctance to come +again within their sphere. + +All that I learned of them, therefore, was comprised in a few brief +and pungent squibs, such as the newspapers were then in the habit of +bestowing on our socialist enterprise. There was one paragraph, +which if I rightly guessed its purport bore reference to Zenobia, but +was too darkly hinted to convey even thus much of certainty. +Hollingsworth, too, with his philanthropic project, afforded the +penny-a-liners a theme for some savage and bloody minded jokes; and, +considerably to my surprise, they affected me with as much +indignation as if we had still been friends. + +Thus passed several weeks; time long enough for my brown and +toil-hardened hands to reaccustom themselves to gloves. Old habits, +such as were merely external, returned upon me with wonderful +promptitude. My superficial talk, too, assumed altogether a worldly +tone. Meeting former acquaintances, who showed themselves inclined +to ridicule my heroic devotion to the cause of human welfare, I spoke +of the recent phase of my life as indeed fair matter for a jest. But, +I also gave them to understand that it was, at most, only an +experiment, on which I had staked no valuable amount of hope or fear. +It had enabled me to pass the summer in a novel and agreeable way, +had afforded me some grotesque specimens of artificial simplicity, +and could not, therefore, so far as I was concerned, be reckoned a +failure. In no one instance, however, did I voluntarily speak of my +three friends. They dwelt in a profounder region. The more I +consider myself as I then was, the more do I recognize how deeply my +connection with those three had affected all my being. + +As it was already the epoch of annihilated space, I might in the time +I was away from Blithedale have snatched a glimpse at England, and +been back again. But my wanderings were confined within a very +limited sphere. I hopped and fluttered, like a bird with a string +about its leg, gyrating round a small circumference, and keeping up a +restless activity to no purpose. Thus it was still in our familiar +Massachusetts--in one of its white country villages--that I must next +particularize an incident. + +The scene was one of those lyceum halls, of which almost every +village has now its own, dedicated to that sober and pallid, or +rather drab-colored, mode of winter-evening entertainment, the +lecture. Of late years this has come strangely into vogue, when the +natural tendency of things would seem to be to substitute lettered +for oral methods of addressing the public. But, in halls like this, +besides the winter course of lectures, there is a rich and varied +series of other exhibitions. Hither comes the ventriloquist, with +all his mysterious tongues; the thaumaturgist, too, with his +miraculous transformations of plates, doves, and rings, his pancakes +smoking in your hat, and his cellar of choice liquors represented in +one small bottle. Here, also, the itinerant professor instructs +separate classes of ladies and gentlemen in physiology, and +demonstrates his lessons by the aid of real skeletons, and manikins +in wax, from Paris. Here is to be heard the choir of Ethiopian +melodists, and to be seen the diorama of Moscow or Bunker Hill, or +the moving panorama of the Chinese wall. Here is displayed the +museum of wax figures, illustrating the wide catholicism of earthly +renown, by mixing up heroes and statesmen, the pope and the Mormon +prophet, kings, queens, murderers, and beautiful ladies; every sort +of person, in short, except authors, of whom I never beheld even the +most famous done in wax. And here, in this many-purposed hall +(unless the selectmen of the village chance to have more than their +share of the Puritanism, which, however diversified with later +patchwork, still gives its prevailing tint to New England character),-- +here the company of strolling players sets up its little stage, and +claims patronage for the legitimate drama. + +But, on the autumnal evening which I speak of, a number of printed +handbills--stuck up in the bar-room, and on the sign-post of the +hotel, and on the meeting-house porch, and distributed largely +through the village--had promised the inhabitants an interview with +that celebrated and hitherto inexplicable phenomenon, the Veiled Lady! + +The hall was fitted up with an amphitheatrical descent of seats +towards a platform, on which stood a desk, two lights, a stool, and a +capacious antique chair. The audience was of a generally decent and +respectable character: old farmers, in their Sunday black coats, with +shrewd, hard, sun-dried faces, and a cynical humor, oftener than any +other expression, in their eyes; pretty girls, in many-colored attire; +pretty young men,--the schoolmaster, the lawyer, or student at law, +the shop-keeper,--all looking rather suburban than rural. In these +days, there is absolutely no rusticity, except when the actual labor +of the soil leaves its earth-mould on the person. There was likewise +a considerable proportion of young and middle-aged women, many of +them stern in feature, with marked foreheads, and a very definite +line of eyebrow; a type of womanhood in which a bold intellectual +development seems to be keeping pace with the progressive delicacy of +the physical constitution. Of all these people I took note, at first, +according to my custom. But I ceased to do so the moment that my +eyes fell on an individual who sat two or three seats below me, +immovable, apparently deep in thought, with his back, of course, +towards me, and his face turned steadfastly upon the platform. + +After sitting awhile in contemplation of this person's familiar +contour, I was irresistibly moved to step over the intervening +benches, lay my hand on his shoulder, put my mouth close to his ear, +and address him in a sepulchral, melodramatic whisper: "Hollingsworth! +where have you left Zenobia?" + +His nerves, however, were proof against my attack. He turned half +around, and looked me in the face with great sad eyes, in which there +was neither kindness nor resentment, nor any perceptible surprise. + +"Zenobia, when I last saw her," he answered, "was at Blithedale." + +He said no more. But there was a great deal of talk going on near me, +among a knot of people who might be considered as representing the +mysticism, or rather the mystic sensuality, of this singular age. +The nature of the exhibition that was about to take place had +probably given the turn to their conversation. + +I heard, from a pale man in blue spectacles, some stranger stories +than ever were written in a romance; told, too, with a simple, +unimaginative steadfastness, which was terribly efficacious in +compelling the auditor to receive them into the category of +established facts. He cited instances of the miraculous power of one +human being over the will and passions of another; insomuch that +settled grief was but a shadow beneath the influence of a man +possessing this potency, and the strong love of years melted away +like a vapor. At the bidding of one of these wizards, the maiden, +with her lover's kiss still burning on her lips, would turn from him +with icy indifference; the newly made widow would dig up her buried +heart out of her young husband's grave before the sods had taken root +upon it; a mother with her babe's milk in her bosom would thrust away +her child. Human character was but soft wax in his hands; and guilt, +or virtue, only the forms into which he should see fit to mould it. +The religious sentiment was a flame which he could blow up with his +breath, or a spark that he could utterly extinguish. It is +unutterable, the horror and disgust with which I listened, and saw +that, if these things were to be believed, the individual soul was +virtually annihilated, and all that is sweet and pure in our present +life debased, and that the idea of man's eternal responsibility was +made ridiculous, and immortality rendered at once impossible, and not +worth acceptance. But I would have perished on the spot sooner than +believe it. + +The epoch of rapping spirits, and all the wonders that have followed +in their train,--such as tables upset by invisible agencies, bells +self-tolled at funerals, and ghostly music performed on jew's-harps,-- +had not yet arrived. Alas, my countrymen, methinks we have fallen +on an evil age! If these phenomena have not humbug at the bottom, so +much the worse for us. What can they indicate, in a spiritual way, +except that the soul of man is descending to a lower point than it +has ever before reached while incarnate? We are pursuing a downward +course in the eternal march, and thus bring ourselves into the same +range with beings whom death, in requital of their gross and evil +lives, has degraded below humanity! To hold intercourse with spirits +of this order, we must stoop and grovel in some element more vile +than earthly dust. These goblins, if they exist at all, are but the +shadows of past mortality, outcasts, mere refuse stuff, adjudged +unworthy of the eternal world, and, on the most favorable supposition, +dwindling gradually into nothingness. The less we have to say to +them the better, lest we share their fate! + +The audience now began to be impatient; they signified their desire +for the entertainment to commence by thump of sticks and stamp of +boot-heels. Nor was it a great while longer before, in response to +their call, there appeared a bearded personage in Oriental robes, +looking like one of the enchanters of the Arabian Nights. He came +upon the platform from a side door, saluted the spectators, not with +a salaam, but a bow, took his station at the desk, and first blowing +his nose with a white handkerchief, prepared to speak. The +environment of the homely village hall, and the absence of many +ingenious contrivances of stage effect with which the exhibition had +heretofore been set off, seemed to bring the artifice of this +character more openly upon the surface. No sooner did I behold the +bearded enchanter, than, laying my hand again on Hollingsworth's +shoulder, I whispered in his ear, "Do you know him?" + +"I never saw the man before," he muttered, without turning his head. + +But I had seen him three times already. + +Once, on occasion of my first visit to the Veiled Lady; a second time, +in the wood-path at Blithedale; and lastly, in Zenobia's +drawing-room. It was Westervelt. A quick association of ideas made +me shudder from head to foot; and again, like an evil spirit, +bringing up reminiscences of a man's sins, I whispered a question in +Hollingsworth's ear,--"What have you done with Priscilla?" + +He gave a convulsive start, as if I had thrust a knife into him, +writhed himself round on his seat, glared fiercely into my eyes, but +answered not a word. + +The Professor began his discourse, explanatory of the psychological +phenomena, as he termed them, which it was his purpose to exhibit to +the spectators. There remains no very distinct impression of it on +my memory. It was eloquent, ingenious, plausible, with a delusive +show of spirituality, yet really imbued throughout with a cold and +dead materialism. I shivered, as at a current of chill air issuing +out of a sepulchral vault, and bringing the smell of corruption along +with it. He spoke of a new era that was dawning upon the world; an +era that would link soul to soul, and the present life to what we +call futurity, with a closeness that should finally convert both +worlds into one great, mutually conscious brotherhood. He described +(in a strange, philosophical guise, with terms of art, as if it were +a matter of chemical discovery) the agency by which this mighty +result was to be effected; nor would it have surprised me, had he +pretended to hold up a portion of his universally pervasive fluid, as +he affirmed it to be, in a glass phial. + +At the close of his exordium, the Professor beckoned with his hand,-- +once, twice, thrice,--and a figure came gliding upon the platform, +enveloped in a long veil of silvery whiteness. It fell about her +like the texture of a summer cloud, with a kind of vagueness, so that +the outline of the form beneath it could not be accurately discerned. +But the movement of the Veiled Lady was graceful, free, and +unembarrassed, like that of a person accustomed to be the spectacle +of thousands; or, possibly, a blindfold prisoner within the sphere +with which this dark earthly magician had surrounded her, she was +wholly unconscious of being the central object to all those straining +eyes. + +Pliant to his gesture (which had even an obsequious courtesy, but at +the same time a remarkable decisiveness), the figure placed itself in +the great chair. Sitting there, in such visible obscurity, it was, +perhaps, as much like the actual presence of a disembodied spirit as +anything that stage trickery could devise. The hushed breathing of +the spectators proved how high-wrought were their anticipations of +the wonders to be performed through the medium of this +incomprehensible creature. I, too, was in breathless suspense, but +with a far different presentiment of some strange event at hand. + +"You see before you the Veiled Lady, said the bearded Professor, +advancing to the verge of the platform. "By the agency of which I +have just spoken, she is at this moment in communion with the +spiritual world. That silvery veil is, in one sense, an enchantment, +having been dipped, as it were, and essentially imbued, through the +potency of my art, with the fluid medium of spirits. Slight and +ethereal as it seems, the limitations of time and space have no +existence within its folds. This hall--these hundreds of faces, +encompassing her within so narrow an amphitheatre--are of thinner +substance, in her view, than the airiest vapor that the clouds are +made of. She beholds the Absolute!" + +As preliminary to other and far more wonderful psychological +experiments, the exhibitor suggested that some of his auditors should +endeavor to make the Veiled Lady sensible of their presence by such +methods--provided only no touch were laid upon her person--as they +might deem best adapted to that end. Accordingly, several +deep-lunged country fellows, who looked as if they might have blown +the apparition away with a breath, ascended the platform. Mutually +encouraging one another, they shouted so close to her ear that the +veil stirred like a wreath of vanishing mist; they smote upon the +floor with bludgeons; they perpetrated so hideous a clamor, that +methought it might have reached, at least, a little way into the +eternal sphere. Finally, with the assent of the Professor, they laid +hold of the great chair, and were startled, apparently, to find it +soar upward, as if lighter than the air through which it rose. But +the Veiled Lady remained + +seated and motionless, with a composure that was hardly less than +awful, because implying so immeasurable a distance betwixt her and +these rude persecutors. + +"These efforts are wholly without avail," observed the Professor, who +had been looking on with an aspect of serene indifference. "The roar +of a battery of cannon would be inaudible to the Veiled Lady. And +yet, were I to will it, sitting in this very hall, she could hear the +desert wind sweeping over the sands as far off as Arabia; the +icebergs grinding one against the other in the polar seas; the rustle +of a leaf in an East Indian forest; the lowest whispered breath of +the bashfullest maiden in the world, uttering the first confession of +her love. Nor does there exist the moral inducement, apart from my +own behest, that could persuade her to lift the silvery veil, or +arise out of that chair." + +Greatly to the Professor's discomposure, however, just as he spoke +these words, the Veiled Lady arose. There was a mysterious tremor +that shook the magic veil. The spectators, it may be, imagined that +she was about to take flight into that invisible sphere, and to the +society of those purely spiritual beings with whom they reckoned her +so near akin. Hollingsworth, a moment ago, had mounted the platform, +and now stood gazing at the figure, with a sad intentness that +brought the whole power of his great, stern, yet tender soul into his +glance. + +"Come," said he, waving his hand towards her. "You are safe!" + +She threw off the veil, and stood before that multitude of people +pale, tremulous, shrinking, as if only then had she discovered that a +thousand eyes were gazing at her. Poor maiden! How strangely had +she been betrayed! Blazoned abroad as a wonder of the world, and +performing what were adjudged as miracles,--in the faith of many, a +seeress and a prophetess; in the harsher judgment of others, a +mountebank,--she had kept, as I religiously believe, her virgin +reserve and sanctity of soul throughout it all. Within that +encircling veil, though an evil hand had flung it over her, there was +as deep a seclusion as if this forsaken girl had, all the while, been +sitting under the shadow of Eliot's pulpit, in the Blithedale woods, +at the feet of him who now summoned her to the shelter of his arms. +And the true heart-throb of a woman's affection was too powerful for +the jugglery that had hitherto environed her. She uttered a shriek, +and fled to Hollingsworth, like one escaping from her deadliest enemy, +and was safe forever. + + + + +XXIV. THE MASQUERADERS + +Two nights had passed since the foregoing occurrences, when, in a +breezy September forenoon, I set forth from town, on foot, towards +Blithedale. It was the most delightful of all days for a walk, with +a dash of invigorating ice-temper in the air, but a coolness that +soon gave place to the brisk glow of exercise, while the vigor +remained as elastic as before. The atmosphere had a spirit and +sparkle in it. Each breath was like a sip of ethereal wine, tempered, +as I said, with a crystal lump of ice. I had started on this +expedition in an exceedingly sombre mood, as well befitted one who +found himself tending towards home, but was conscious that nobody +would be quite overjoyed to greet him there. My feet were hardly off +the pavement, however, when this morbid sensation began to yield to +the lively influences of air and motion. Nor had I gone far, with +fields yet green on either side, before my step became as swift and +light as if Hollingsworth were waiting to exchange a friendly +hand-grip, and Zenobia's and Priscilla's open arms would welcome the +wanderer's reappearance. It has happened to me on other occasions, +as well as this, to prove how a state of physical well-being can +create a kind of joy, in spite of the profoundest anxiety of mind. + +The pathway of that walk still runs along, with sunny freshness, +through my memory. I know not why it should be so. But my mental +eye can even now discern the September grass, bordering the pleasant +roadside with a brighter verdure than while the summer heats were +scorching it; the trees, too, mostly green, although here and there a +branch or shrub has donned its vesture of crimson and gold a week or +two before its fellows. I see the tufted barberry-bushes, with their +small clusters of scarlet fruit; the toadstools, likewise,--some +spotlessly white, others yellow or red,--mysterious growths, +springing suddenly from no root or seed, and growing nobody can tell +how or wherefore. In this respect they resembled many of the +emotions in my breast. And I still see the little rivulets, chill, +clear, and bright, that murmured beneath the road, through +subterranean rocks, and deepened into mossy pools, where tiny fish +were darting to and fro, and within which lurked the hermit frog. +But no,--I never can account for it, that, with a yearning interest +to learn the upshot of all my story, and returning to Blithedale for +that sole purpose, I should examine these things so like a +peaceful-bosomed naturalist. Nor why, amid all my sympathies and +fears, there shot, at times, a wild exhilaration through my frame. + +Thus I pursued my way along the line of the ancient stone wall that +Paul Dudley built, and through white villages, and past orchards of +ruddy apples, and fields of ripening maize, and patches of woodland, +and all such sweet rural scenery as looks the fairest, a little +beyond the suburbs of a town. Hollingsworth, Zenobia, Priscilla! +They glided mistily before me, as I walked. Sometimes, in my +solitude, I laughed with the bitterness of self-scorn, remembering +how unreservedly I had given up my heart and soul to interests that +were not mine. What had I ever had to do with them? And why, being +now free, should I take this thraldom on me once again? It was both +sad and dangerous, I whispered to myself, to be in too close affinity +with the passions, the errors, and the misfortunes of individuals who +stood within a circle of their own, into which, if I stept at all, it +must be as an intruder, and at a peril that I could not estimate. + +Drawing nearer to Blithedale, a sickness of the spirits kept +alternating with my flights of causeless buoyancy. I indulged in a +hundred odd and extravagant conjectures. Either there was no such +place as Blithedale, nor ever had been, nor any brotherhood of +thoughtful laborers, like what I seemed to recollect there, or else +it was all changed during my absence. It had been nothing but dream +work and enchantment. I should seek in vain for the old farmhouse, +and for the greensward, the potato-fields, the root-crops, and acres +of Indian corn, and for all that configuration of the land which I +had imagined. It would be another spot, and an utter strangeness. + +These vagaries were of the spectral throng so apt to steal out of an +unquiet heart. They partly ceased to haunt me, on my arriving at a +point whence, through the trees, I began to catch glimpses of the +Blithedale farm. That surely was something real. There was hardly a +square foot of all those acres on which I had not trodden heavily, in +one or another kind of toil. The curse of Adam's posterity--and, +curse or blessing be it, it gives substance to the life around +us--had first come upon me there. In the sweat of my brow I had +there earned bread and eaten it, and so established my claim to be on +earth, and my fellowship with all the sons of labor. I could have +knelt down, and have laid my breast against that soil. The red clay +of which my frame was moulded seemed nearer akin to those crumbling +furrows than to any other portion of the world's dust. There was my +home, and there might be my grave. + +I felt an invincible reluctance, nevertheless, at the idea of +presenting myself before my old associates, without first +ascertaining the state in which they were. A nameless foreboding +weighed upon me. Perhaps, should I know all the circumstances that +had occurred, I might find it my wisest course to turn back, +unrecognized, unseen, and never look at Blithedale more. Had it been +evening, I would have stolen softly to some lighted window of the old +farmhouse, and peeped darkling in, to see all their well-known faces +round the supper-board. Then, were there a vacant seat, I might +noiselessly unclose the door, glide in, and take my place among them, +without a word. My entrance might be so quiet, my aspect so familiar, +that they would forget how long I had been away, and suffer me to +melt into the scene, as a wreath of vapor melts into a larger cloud. +I dreaded a boisterous greeting. Beholding me at table, Zenobia, as +a matter of course, would send me a cup of tea, and Hollingsworth +fill my plate from the great dish of pandowdy, and Priscilla, in her +quiet way, would hand the cream, and others help me to the bread and +butter. Being one of them again, the knowledge of what had happened +would come to me without a shock. For still, at every turn of my +shifting fantasies, the thought stared me in the face that some evil +thing had befallen us, or was ready to befall. + +Yielding to this ominous impression, I now turned aside into the +woods, resolving to spy out the posture of the Community as craftily +as the wild Indian before he makes his onset. I would go wandering +about the outskirts of the farm, and, perhaps, catching sight of a +solitary acquaintance, would approach him amid the brown shadows of +the trees (a kind of medium fit for spirits departed and revisitant, +like myself), and entreat him to tell me how all things were. + +The first living creature that I met was a partridge, which sprung up +beneath my feet, and whirred away; the next was a squirrel, who +chattered angrily at me from an overhanging bough. I trod along by +the dark, sluggish river, and remember pausing on the bank, above one +of its blackest and most placid pools (the very spot, with the +barkless stump of a tree aslantwise over the water, is depicting +itself to my fancy at this instant), and wondering how deep it was, +and if any overladen soul had ever flung its weight of mortality in +thither, and if it thus escaped the burden, or only made it heavier. +And perhaps the skeleton of the drowned wretch still lay beneath the +inscrutable depth, clinging to some sunken log at the bottom with the +gripe of its old despair. So slight, however, was the track of these +gloomy ideas, that I soon forgot them in the contemplation of a brood +of wild ducks, which were floating on the river, and anon took flight, +leaving each a bright streak over the black surface. By and by, I +came to my hermitage, in the heart of the white-pine tree, and +clambering up into it, sat down to rest. The grapes, which I had +watched throughout the summer, now dangled around me in abundant +clusters of the deepest purple, deliciously sweet to the taste, and, +though wild, yet free from that ungentle flavor which distinguishes +nearly all our native and uncultivated grapes. Methought a wine +might be pressed out of them possessing a passionate zest, and +endowed with a new kind of intoxicating quality, attended with such +bacchanalian ecstasies as the tamer grapes of Madeira, France, and +the Rhine are inadequate to produce. And I longed to quaff a great +goblet of it that moment! + +While devouring the grapes, I looked on all sides out of the +peep-holes of my hermitage, and saw the farmhouse, the fields, and +almost every part of our domain, but not a single human figure in the +landscape. Some of the windows of the house were open, but with no +more signs of life than in a dead man's unshut eyes. The barn-door +was ajar, and swinging in the + +breeze. The big old dog,--he was a relic of the former dynasty of +the farm,--that hardly ever stirred out of the yard, was nowhere to +be seen. What, then, had become of all the fraternity and +sisterhood? Curious to ascertain this point, I let myself down out +of the tree, and going to the edge of the wood, was glad to perceive +our herd of cows chewing the cud or grazing not far off. I fancied, +by their manner, that two or three of them recognized me (as, indeed, +they ought, for I had milked them and been their chamberlain times +without number); but, after staring me in the face a little while, +they phlegmatically began grazing and chewing their cuds again. Then +I grew foolishly angry at so cold a reception, and flung some rotten +fragments of an old stump at these unsentimental cows. + +Skirting farther round the pasture, I heard voices and much laughter +proceeding from the interior of the wood. Voices, male and feminine; +laughter, not only of fresh young throats, but the bass of grown +people, as if solemn organ-pipes should pour out airs of merriment. +Not a voice spoke, but I knew it better than my own; not a laugh, but +its cadences were familiar. The wood, in this portion of it, seemed +as full of jollity as if Comus and his crew were holding their revels +in one of its usually lonesome glades. Stealing onward as far as I +durst, without hazard of discovery, I saw a concourse of strange +figures beneath the overshadowing branches. They appeared, and +vanished, and came again, confusedly with the streaks of sunlight +glimmering down upon them. + +Among them was an Indian chief, with blanket, feathers, and war-paint, +and uplifted tomahawk; and near him, looking fit to be his woodland +bride, the goddess Diana, with the crescent on her head, and attended +by our big lazy dog, in lack of any fleeter hound. Drawing an arrow +from her quiver, she let it fly at a venture, and hit the very tree +behind which I happened to be lurking. Another group consisted of a +Bavarian broom-girl, a negro of the Jim Crow order, one or two +foresters of the Middle Ages, a Kentucky woodsman in his trimmed +hunting-shirt and deerskin leggings, and a Shaker elder, quaint, +demure, broad-brimmed, and square-skirted. Shepherds of Arcadia, and +allegoric figures from the "Faerie Queen," were oddly mixed up with +these. Arm in arm, or otherwise huddled together in strange +discrepancy, stood grim Puritans, gay Cavaliers, and Revolutionary +officers with three-cornered cocked hats, and queues longer than +their swords. A bright-complexioned, dark-haired, vivacious little +gypsy, with a red shawl over her head, went from one group to another, +telling fortunes by palmistry; and Moll Pitcher, the renowned old +witch of Lynn, broomstick in hand, showed herself prominently in the +midst, as if announcing all these apparitions to be the offspring of +her necromantic art. But Silas Foster, who leaned against a tree +near by, in his customary blue frock and smoking a short pipe, did +more to disenchant the scene, with his look of shrewd, acrid, Yankee +observation, than twenty witches and necromancers could have done in +the way of rendering it weird and fantastic. + +A little farther off, some old-fashioned skinkers and drawers, all +with portentously red noses, were spreading a banquet on the +leaf-strewn earth; while a horned and long-tailed gentleman (in whom +I recognized the fiendish musician erst seen by Tam O'Shanter) tuned +his fiddle, and summoned the whole motley rout to a dance, before +partaking of the festal cheer. So they joined hands in a circle, +whirling round so swiftly, so madly, and so merrily, in time and tune +with the Satanic music, that their separate incongruities were +blended all together, and they became a kind of entanglement that +went nigh to turn one's brain with merely looking at it. Anon they +stopt all of a sudden, and staring at one another's figures, set up a +roar of laughter; whereat a shower of the September leaves (which, +all day long, had been hesitating whether to fall or no) were shaken +off by the movement of the air, and came eddying down upon the +revellers. + +Then, for lack of breath, ensued a silence, at the deepest point of +which, tickled by the oddity of surprising my grave associates in +this masquerading trim, I could not possibly refrain from a burst of +laughter on my own separate account; + +"Hush!" I heard the pretty gypsy fortuneteller say. "Who is that +laughing?" + +"Some profane intruder!" said the goddess Diana. "I shall send an +arrow through his heart, or change him into a stag, as I did Actaeon, +if he peeps from behind the trees!" + +"Me take his scalp!" cried the Indian chief, brandishing his tomahawk, +and cutting a great caper in the air. + +"I'll root him in the earth with a spell that I have at my tongue's +end!" squeaked Moll Pitcher. "And the green moss shall grow all over +him, before he gets free again!" + +"The voice was Miles Coverdale's," said the fiendish fiddler, with a +whisk of his tail and a toss of his horns. "My music has brought him +hither. He is always ready to dance to the Devil's tune!" + +Thus put on the right track, they all recognized the voice at once, +and set up a simultaneous shout. + +"Miles! Miles! Miles Coverdale, where are you?" they cried. +"Zenobia! Queen Zenobia! here is one of your vassals lurking in the +wood. Command him to approach and pay his duty!" + +The whole fantastic rabble forthwith streamed off in pursuit of me, +so that I was like a mad poet hunted by chimeras. Having fairly the +start of them, however, I succeeded in making my escape, and soon +left their merriment and riot at a good distance in the rear. Its +fainter tones assumed a kind of mournfulness, and were finally lost +in the hush and solemnity of the wood. In my haste, I stumbled over +a heap of logs and sticks that had been cut for firewood, a great +while ago, by some former possessor of the soil, and piled up square, +in order to be carted or sledded away to the farmhouse. But, being +forgotten, they had lain there perhaps fifty years, and possibly much +longer; until, by the accumulation of moss, and the leaves falling +over them, and decaying there, from autumn to autumn, a green mound +was formed, in which the softened outline of the woodpile was still +perceptible. In the fitful mood that then swayed my mind, I found +something strangely affecting in this simple circumstance. I +imagined the long-dead woodman, and his long-dead wife and children, +coming out of their chill graves, and essaying to make a fire with +this heap of mossy fuel! + +From this spot I strayed onward, quite lost in reverie, and neither +knew nor cared whither I was going, until a low, soft, +well-remembered voice spoke, at a little distance. + +"There is Mr. Coverdale!" + +"Miles Coverdale!" said another voice,--and its tones were very stern. +"Let him come forward, then!" + +"Yes, Mr. Coverdale," cried a woman's voice,--clear and melodious, +but, just then, with something unnatural in its chord,--"you are +welcome! But you come half an hour too late, and have missed a scene +which you would have enjoyed!" + +I looked up and found myself nigh Eliot's pulpit, at the base of +which sat Hollingsworth, with Priscilla at his feet and Zenobia +standing before them. + + + +XXV. THE THREE TOGETHER + +Hollingsworth was in his ordinary working-dress. Priscilla wore a +pretty and simple gown, with a kerchief about her neck, and a calash, +which she had flung back from her head, leaving it suspended by the +strings. But Zenobia (whose part among the maskers, as may be +supposed, was no inferior one) appeared in a costume of fanciful +magnificence, with her jewelled flower as the central ornament of +what resembled a leafy crown, or coronet. She represented the +Oriental princess by whose name we were accustomed to know her. Her +attitude was free and noble; yet, if a queen's, it was not that of a +queen triumphant, but dethroned, on trial for her life, or, perchance, +condemned already. The spirit of the conflict seemed, nevertheless, +to be alive in her. Her eyes were on fire; her cheeks had each a +crimson spot, so exceedingly vivid, and marked with so definite an +outline, that I at first doubted whether it were not artificial. In +a very brief space, however, this idea was shamed by the paleness +that ensued, as the blood sunk suddenly away. Zenobia now looked +like marble. + +One always feels the fact, in an instant, when he has intruded on +those who love, or those who hate, at some acme of their passion that +puts them into a sphere of their own, where no other spirit can +pretend to stand on equal ground with them. I was confused,-- +affected even with a species of terror,--and wished myself away. +The intenseness of their feelings gave them the exclusive property of +the soil and atmosphere, and left me no right to be or breathe there. + +"Hollingsworth,--Zenobia,--I have just returned to Blithedale," said +I, "and had no thought of finding you here. We shall meet again at +the house. I will retire." + +"This place is free to you," answered Hollingsworth. + +"As free as to ourselves," added Zenobia. "This long while past, you +have been following up your game, groping for human emotions in the +dark corners of the heart. Had you been here a little sooner, you +might have seen them dragged into the daylight. I could even wish to +have my trial over again, with you standing by to see fair play! Do +you know, Mr. Coverdale, I have been on trial for my life?" + +She laughed, while speaking thus. But, in truth, as my eyes wandered +from one of the group to another, I saw in Hollingsworth all that an +artist could desire for the grim portrait of a Puritan magistrate +holding inquest of life and death in a case of witchcraft; in Zenobia, +the sorceress herself, not aged, wrinkled, and decrepit, but fair +enough to tempt Satan with a force reciprocal to his own; and, in +Priscilla, the pale victim, whose soul and body had been wasted by +her spells. Had a pile of fagots been heaped against the rock, this +hint of impending doom would have completed the suggestive picture. + +"It was too hard upon me," continued Zenobia, addressing +Hollingsworth, "that judge, jury, and accuser should all be +comprehended in one man! I demur, as I think the lawyers say, to the +jurisdiction. But let the learned Judge Coverdale seat himself on +the top of the rock, and you and me stand at its base, side by side, +pleading our cause before him! There might, at least, be two +criminals instead of one." + +"You forced this on me," replied Hollingsworth, looking her sternly +in the face. "Did I call you hither from among the masqueraders +yonder? Do I assume to be your judge? No; except so far as I have +an unquestionable right of judgment, in order to settle my own line +of behavior towards those with whom the events of life bring me in +contact. True, I have already judged you, but not on the world's +part,--neither do I pretend to pass a sentence!" + +"Ah, this is very good!" cried Zenobia with a smile. "What strange +beings you men are, Mr. Coverdale!--is it not so? It is the simplest +thing in the world with you to bring a woman before your secret +tribunals, and judge and condemn her unheard, and then tell her to go +free without a sentence. The misfortune is, that this same secret +tribunal chances to be the only judgment-seat that a true woman +stands in awe of, and that any verdict short of acquittal is +equivalent to a death sentence!" + +The more I looked at them, and the more I heard, the stronger grew my +impression that a crisis had just come and gone. On Hollingsworth's +brow it had left a stamp like that of irrevocable doom, of which his +own will was the instrument. In Zenobia's whole person, beholding +her more closely, I saw a riotous agitation; the almost delirious +disquietude of a great struggle, at the close of which the vanquished +one felt her strength and courage still mighty within her, and longed +to renew the contest. My sensations were as if I had come upon a +battlefield before the smoke was as yet cleared away. + +And what subjects had been discussed here? All, no doubt, that for +so many months past had kept my heart and my imagination idly +feverish. Zenobia's whole character and history; the true nature of +her mysterious connection with Westervelt; her later purposes towards +Hollingsworth, and, reciprocally, his in reference to her; and, +finally, the degree in which Zenobia had been cognizant of the plot +against Priscilla, and what, at last, had been the real object of +that scheme. On these points, as before, I was left to my own +conjectures. One thing, only, was certain. Zenobia and +Hollingsworth were friends no longer. If their heartstrings were +ever intertwined, the knot had been adjudged an entanglement, and was +now violently broken. + +But Zenobia seemed unable to rest content with the matter in the +posture which it had assumed. + +"Ah! do we part so?" exclaimed she, seeing Hollingsworth about to +retire. + +"And why not?" said he, with almost rude abruptness. "What is there +further to be said between us?" + +"Well, perhaps nothing," answered Zenobia, looking him in the face, +and smiling. "But we have come many times before to this gray rock, +and we have talked very softly among the whisperings of the +birch-trees. They were pleasant hours! I love to make the latest of +them, though not altogether so delightful, loiter away as slowly as +may be. And, besides, you have put many queries to me at this, which +you design to be our last interview; and being driven, as I must +acknowledge, into a corner, I have responded with reasonable +frankness. But now, with your free consent, I desire the privilege +of asking a few questions, in my turn." + +"I have no concealments," said Hollingsworth. + +"We shall see," answered Zenobia. "I would first inquire whether you +have supposed me to be wealthy?" + +"On that point," observed Hollingsworth, "I have had the opinion +which the world holds." + +"And I held it likewise," said Zenobia. "Had I not, Heaven is my +witness the knowledge should have been as free to you as me. It is +only three days since I knew the strange fact that threatens to make +me poor; and your own acquaintance with it, I suspect, is of at least +as old a date. I fancied myself affluent. You are aware, too, of +the disposition which I purposed making of the larger portion of my +imaginary opulence,--nay, were it all, I had not hesitated. Let me +ask you, further, did I ever propose or intimate any terms of compact, +on which depended this--as the world would consider it--so important +sacrifice?" + +"You certainly spoke of none," said Hollingsworth. + +"Nor meant any," she responded. "I was willing to realize your dream +freely,--generously, as some might think,--but, at all events, fully, +and heedless though it should prove the ruin of my fortune. + +If, in your own thoughts, you have imposed any conditions of this +expenditure, it is you that must be held responsible for whatever is +sordid and unworthy in them. And now one other question. Do you +love this girl?" + +"O Zenobia!" exclaimed Priscilla, shrinking back, as if longing for +the rock to topple over and hide her. + +"Do you love her?" repeated Zenobia. + +"Had you asked me that question a short time since," replied +Hollingsworth, after a pause, during which, it seemed to me, even the +birch-trees held their whispering breath, "I should have told +you--'No!' My feelings for Priscilla differed little from those of an +elder brother, watching tenderly over the gentle sister whom God has +given him to protect." + +"And what is your answer now?" persisted Zenobia. + +"I do love her!" said Hollingsworth, uttering the words with a deep +inward breath, instead of speaking them outright. "As well declare +it thus as in any other way. I do love her!" + +"Now, God be judge between us," cried Zenobia, breaking into sudden +passion, "which of us two has most mortally offended Him! At least, +I am a woman, with every fault, it may be, that a woman ever had,-- +weak, vain, unprincipled (like most of my sex; for our virtues, +when we have any, are merely impulsive and intuitive), passionate, +too, and pursuing my foolish and unattainable ends by indirect and +cunning, though absurdly chosen means, as an hereditary bond-slave +must; false, moreover, to the whole circle of good, in my reckless +truth to the little good I saw before me,--but still a woman! A +creature whom only a little change of earthly fortune, a little +kinder smile of Him who sent me hither, and one true heart to +encourage and direct me, might have made all that a woman can be! +But how is it with you? Are you a man? No; but a monster! A cold, +heartless, self-beginning and self-ending piece of mechanism!" + +"With what, then, do you charge me!" asked Hollingsworth, aghast, and +greatly disturbed by this attack. "Show me one selfish end, in all I +ever aimed at, and you may cut it out of my bosom with a knife!" + +"It is all self!" answered Zenobia with still intenser bitterness. +"Nothing else; nothing but self, self, self! The fiend, I doubt not, +has made his choicest mirth of you these seven years past, and +especially in the mad summer which we have spent together. I see it +now! I am awake, disenchanted, disinthralled! Self, self, self! +You have embodied yourself in a project. You are a better +masquerader than the witches and gypsies yonder; for your disguise is +a self-deception. See whither it has brought you! First, you aimed +a death-blow, and a treacherous one, at this scheme of a purer and +higher life, which so many noble spirits had wrought out. Then, +because Coverdale could not be quite your slave, you threw him +ruthlessly away. And you took me, too, into your plan, as long as +there was hope of my being available, and now fling me aside again, a +broken tool! But, foremost and blackest of your sins, you stifled +down your inmost consciousness!--you did a deadly wrong to your own +heart!--you were ready to sacrifice this girl, whom, if God ever +visibly showed a purpose, He put into your charge, and through whom +He was striving to redeem you!" + +"This is a woman's view," said Hollingsworth, growing deadly pale,-- +"a woman's, whose whole sphere of action is in the heart, and who +can conceive of no higher nor wider one!" + +"Be silent!" cried Zenobia imperiously. "You know neither man nor +woman! The utmost that can be said in your behalf--and because I +would not be wholly despicable in my own eyes, but would fain excuse +my wasted feelings, nor own it wholly a delusion, therefore I say +it--is, that a great and rich heart has been ruined in your breast. +Leave me, now. You + +have done with me, and I with you. Farewell!" + +"Priscilla," said Hollingsworth, "come." Zenobia smiled; possibly I +did so too. Not often, in human life, has a gnawing sense of injury +found a sweeter morsel of revenge than was conveyed in the tone with +which Hollingsworth spoke those two words. It was the abased and +tremulous tone of a man whose faith in himself was shaken, and who +sought, at last, to lean on an affection. Yes; the strong man bowed +himself and rested on this poor Priscilla! Oh, could she have failed +him, what a triumph for the lookers-on! + +And, at first, I half imagined that she was about to fail him. She +rose up, stood shivering like the birch leaves that trembled over her +head, and then slowly tottered, rather than walked, towards Zenobia. +Arriving at her feet, she sank down there, in the very same attitude +which she had assumed on their first meeting, in the kitchen of the +old farmhouse. Zenobia remembered it. + +"Ah, Priscilla!" said she, shaking her head, "how much is changed +since then! You kneel to a dethroned princess. You, the victorious +one! But he is waiting for you. Say what you wish, and leave me." + +"We are sisters!" gasped Priscilla. + +I fancied that I understood the word and action. It meant the +offering of herself, and all she had, to be at Zenobia's disposal. +But the latter would not take it thus. + +"True, we are sisters!" she replied; and, moved by the sweet word, +she stooped down and kissed Priscilla; but not lovingly, for a sense +of fatal harm received through her seemed to be lurking in Zenobia's +heart. "We had one father! You knew it from the first; I, but a +little while,--else some things that have chanced might have been +spared you. But I never wished you harm. You stood between me and +an end which I desired. I wanted a clear path. No matter what I +meant. It is over now. Do you forgive me?" + +"O Zenobia," sobbed Priscilla, "it is I that feel like the guilty one!" + +"No, no, poor little thing!" said Zenobia, with a sort of contempt. +"You have been my evil fate, but there never was a babe with less +strength or will to do an injury. Poor child! Methinks you have but +a melancholy lot before you, sitting all alone in that wide, +cheerless heart, where, for aught you know,--and as I, alas! believe,-- +the fire which you have kindled may soon go out. Ah, the thought +makes me shiver for you! What will you do, Priscilla, when you find +no spark among the ashes?" + +"Die!" she answered. + +"That was well said!" responded Zenobia, with an approving smile. +"There is all a woman in your little compass, my poor sister. +Meanwhile, go with him, and live!" + +She waved her away with a queenly gesture, and turned her own face to +the rock. I watched Priscilla, wondering what judgment she would +pass between Zenobia and Hollingsworth; how interpret his behavior, +so as to reconcile it with true faith both towards her sister and +herself; how compel her love for him to keep any terms whatever with +her sisterly affection! But, in truth, there was no such difficulty +as I imagined. Her engrossing love made it all clear. Hollingsworth +could have no fault. That was the one principle at the centre of the +universe. And the doubtful guilt or possible integrity of other +people, appearances, self-evident facts, the testimony of her own +senses,--even Hollingsworth's self-accusation, had he volunteered it,-- +would have weighed not the value of a mote of thistledown on the +other side. So secure was she of his right, that she never thought +of comparing it with another's wrong, but left the latter to itself. + +Hollingsworth drew her arm within his, and soon disappeared with her +among the trees. I cannot imagine how Zenobia knew when they were +out of sight; she never glanced again towards them. But, retaining a +proud attitude so long as they might have thrown back a retiring look, +they were no sooner departed,--utterly departed,--than she began +slowly to sink down. It was as if a great, invisible, irresistible +weight were pressing her to the earth. Settling upon her knees, she +leaned her forehead against the rock, and sobbed convulsively; dry +sobs they seemed to be, such as have nothing to do with tears. + + + +XXVI. ZENOBIA AND COVERDALE + +Zenobia had entirely forgotten me. She fancied herself alone with +her great grief. And had it been only a common pity that I felt for +her,--the pity that her proud nature would have repelled, as the one +worst wrong which the world yet held in reserve,--the sacredness and +awfulness of the crisis might have impelled me to steal away silently, +so that not a dry leaf should rustle under my feet. I would have +left her to struggle, in that solitude, with only the eye of God upon +her. But, so it happened, I never once dreamed of questioning my +right to be there now, as I had questioned it just before, when I +came so suddenly upon Hollingsworth and herself, in the passion of +their recent debate. It suits me not to explain what was the analogy +that I saw or imagined between Zenobia's situation and mine; nor, I +believe, will the reader detect this one secret, hidden beneath many +a revelation which perhaps concerned me less. In simple truth, +however, as Zenobia leaned her forehead against the rock, shaken with +that tearless agony, it seemed to me that the self-same pang, with +hardly mitigated torment, leaped thrilling from her heartstrings to +my own. Was it wrong, therefore, if I felt myself consecrated to the +priesthood by sympathy like this, and called upon to minister to this +woman's affliction, so far as mortal could? + +But, indeed, what could mortal do for her? Nothing! The attempt +would be a mockery and an anguish. Time, it is true, would steal +away her grief, and bury it and the best of her heart in the same +grave. But Destiny itself, methought, in its kindliest mood, could +do no better for Zenobia, in the way of quick relief; than to cause +the impending rock to impend a little farther, and fall upon her head. +So I leaned against a tree, and listened to her sobs, in unbroken +silence. She was half prostrate, half kneeling, with her forehead +still pressed against the rock. Her sobs were the only sound; she +did not groan, nor give any other utterance to her distress. It was +all involuntary. + +At length she sat up, put back her hair, and stared about her with a +bewildered aspect, as if not distinctly recollecting the scene +through which she had passed, nor cognizant of the situation in which +it left her. Her face and brow were almost purple with the rush of +blood. They whitened, however, by and by, and for some time retained +this deathlike hue. She put her hand to her forehead, with a gesture +that made me forcibly conscious of an intense and living pain there. + +Her glance, wandering wildly to and fro, passed over me several times, +without appearing to inform her of my presence. But, finally, a +look of recognition gleamed from her eyes into mine. + +"Is it you, Miles Coverdale?" said she, smiling. "Ah, I perceive +what you are about! You are turning this whole affair into a ballad. +Pray let me hear as many stanzas as you happen to have ready." + +"Oh, hush, Zenobia!" I answered. "Heaven knows what an ache is in +my soul!" + +"It is genuine tragedy, is it not?" rejoined Zenobia, with a sharp, +light laugh. "And you are willing to allow, perhaps, that I have had +hard measure. But it is a woman's doom, and I have deserved it like +a woman; so let there be no pity, as, on my part, there shall be no +complaint. It is all right, now, or will shortly be so. But, Mr. +Coverdale, by all means write this ballad, and put your soul's ache +into it, and turn your sympathy to good account, as other poets do, +and as poets must, unless they choose to give us glittering icicles +instead of lines of fire. As for the moral, it shall be distilled +into the final stanza, in a drop of bitter honey." + +"What shall it be, Zenobia?" I inquired, endeavoring to fall in with +her mood. + +"Oh, a very old one will serve the purpose," she replied. "There are +no new truths, much as we have prided ourselves on finding some. A +moral? Why, this: That, in the battlefield of life, the downright +stroke, that would fall only on a man's steel headpiece, is sure to +light on a woman's heart, over which she wears no breastplate, and +whose wisdom it is, therefore, to keep out of the conflict. Or, this: +That the whole universe, her own sex and yours, and Providence, or +Destiny, to boot, make common cause against the woman who swerves one +hair's-breadth out of the beaten track. Yes; and add (for I may as +well own it, now) that, with that one hair's-breadth, she goes all +astray, and never sees the world in its true aspect afterwards." + +"This last is too stern a moral," I observed. "Cannot we soften it a +little?" + +"Do it if you like, at your own peril, not on my responsibility," she +answered. Then, with a sudden change of subject, she went on: "After +all, he has flung away what would have served him better than the +poor, pale flower he kept. What can Priscilla do for him? Put +passionate warmth into his heart, when it shall be chilled with +frozen hopes? Strengthen his hands, when they are weary with much +doing and no performance? No! but only tend towards him with a blind, +instinctive love, and hang her + +little, puny weakness for a clog upon his arm! She cannot even give +him such sympathy as is worth the name. For will he never, in many +an hour of darkness, need that proud intellectual sympathy which he +might have had from me?--the sympathy that would flash light along +his course, and guide, as well as cheer him? Poor Hollingsworth! +Where will he find it now?" + +"Hollingsworth has a heart of ice!" said I bitterly. "He is a wretch!" + +"Do him no wrong," interrupted Zenobia, turning haughtily upon me. +"Presume not to estimate a man like Hollingsworth. It was my fault, +all along, and none of his. I see it now! He never sought me. Why +should he seek me? What had I to offer him? A miserable, bruised, +and battered heart, spoilt long before he met me. A life, too, +hopelessly entangled with a villain's! He did well to cast me off. +God be praised, he did it! And yet, had he trusted me, and borne +with me a little longer, I would have saved him all this trouble." + +She was silent for a time, and stood with her eyes fixed on the +ground. Again raising them, her look was more mild and calm. + +"Miles Coverdale!" said she. + +"Well, Zenobia," I responded. "Can I do you any service?" + +"Very little," she replied. "But it is my purpose, as you may well +imagine, to remove from Blithedale; and, most likely, I may not see +Hollingsworth again. A woman in my position, you understand, feels +scarcely at her ease among former friends. New faces,--unaccustomed +looks,--those only can she tolerate. She would pine among familiar +scenes; she would be apt to blush, too, under the eyes that knew her +secret; her heart might throb uncomfortably; she would mortify +herself, I suppose, with foolish notions of having sacrificed the +honor of her sex at the foot of proud, contumacious man. Poor +womanhood, with its rights and wrongs! Here will be new matter for +my course of lectures, at the idea of which you smiled, Mr. Coverdale, +a month or two ago. But, as you have really a heart and sympathies, +as far as they go, and as I shall depart without seeing Hollingsworth, +I must entreat you to be a messenger between him and me." + +"Willingly," said I, wondering at the strange way in which her mind +seemed to vibrate from the deepest earnest to mere levity. "What is +the message?" + +"True,--what is it?" exclaimed Zenobia. "After all, I hardly know. +On better consideration, I have no message. Tell him,--tell him +something pretty and pathetic, that will come nicely and sweetly into +your ballad,--anything you please, so it be tender and submissive +enough. Tell him he has murdered me! Tell him that I'll haunt him! +"--She spoke these words with the wildest energy.--"And give him--no, +give Priscilla--this!" + +Thus saying, she took the jewelled flower out of her hair; and it +struck me as the act of a queen, when worsted in a combat, +discrowning herself, as if she found a sort of relief in abasing all +her pride. + +"Bid her wear this for Zenobia's sake," she continued. "She is a +pretty little creature, and will make as soft and gentle a wife as +the veriest Bluebeard could desire. Pity that she must fade so soon! +These delicate and puny maidens always do. Ten years hence, let +Hollingsworth look at my face and Priscilla's, and then choose +betwixt them. Or, if he pleases, let him do it now." + +How magnificently Zenobia looked as she said this! The effect of her +beauty was even heightened by the over-consciousness and +self-recognition of it, into which, I suppose, Hollingsworth's scorn +had driven her. She understood the look of admiration in my face; +and--Zenobia to the last--it gave her pleasure. + +"It is an endless pity," said she, "that I had not bethought myself +of winning your heart, Mr. Coverdale, instead of Hollingsworth's. I +think I should have succeeded, and many women would have deemed you +the worthier conquest of the two. You are certainly much the +handsomest man. But there is a fate in these things. And beauty, in +a man, has been of little account with me since my earliest girlhood, +when, for once, it turned my head. Now, farewell!" + +"Zenobia, whither are you going?" I asked. + +"No matter where," said she. "But I am weary of this place, and sick +to death of playing at philanthropy and progress. Of all varieties +of mock-life, we have surely blundered into the very emptiest mockery +in our effort to establish the one true system. I have done with it; +and Blithedale must find another woman to superintend the laundry, +and you, Mr. Coverdale, another nurse to make your gruel, the next +time you fall ill. It was, indeed, a foolish dream! Yet it gave us +some pleasant summer days, and bright hopes, while they lasted. It +can do no more; nor will it avail us to shed tears over a broken +bubble. Here is my hand! Adieu!" + +She gave me her hand with the same free, whole-souled gesture as on +the first afternoon of our acquaintance, and, being greatly moved, I +bethought me of no better method of expressing my deep sympathy than +to carry it to my lips. In so doing, I perceived that this white +hand--so hospitably warm when I first touched it, five months +since--was now cold as a veritable piece of snow. + +"How very cold!" I exclaimed, holding it between both my own, with +the vain idea of warming it. "What can be the reason? It is really +deathlike!" + +"The extremities die first, they say," answered Zenobia, laughing. +"And so you kiss this poor, despised, rejected hand! Well, my dear +friend, I thank you. You have reserved your homage for the fallen. +Lip of man will never touch my hand again. I intend to become a +Catholic, for the sake of going into a nunnery. When you next hear +of Zenobia, her face will be behind the black veil; so look your last +at it now,--for all is over. Once more, farewell!" + +She withdrew her hand, yet left a lingering pressure, which I felt +long afterwards. So intimately connected as I had been with perhaps +the only man in whom she was ever truly interested, Zenobia looked on +me as the representative of all the past, and was conscious that, in +bidding me adieu, she likewise took final leave of Hollingsworth, and +of this whole epoch of her life. Never did her beauty shine out more +lustrously than in the last glimpse that I had of her. She departed, +and was soon hidden among the trees. But, whether it was the strong +impression of the foregoing scene, or whatever else the cause, I was +affected with a fantasy that Zenobia had not actually gone, but was +still hovering about the spot and haunting it. I seemed to feel her +eyes upon me. It was as if the vivid coloring of her character had +left a brilliant stain upon the air. By degrees, however, the +impression grew less distinct. I flung myself upon the fallen leaves +at the base of Eliot's pulpit. The sunshine withdrew up the tree +trunks and flickered on the topmost boughs; gray twilight made the +wood obscure; the stars brightened out; the pendent boughs became wet +with chill autumnal dews. But I was listless, worn out with emotion +on my own behalf and sympathy for others, and had no heart to leave +my comfortless lair beneath the rock. + +I must have fallen asleep, and had a dream, all the circumstances of +which utterly vanished at the moment when they converged to some +tragical catastrophe, and thus grew too powerful for the thin sphere +of slumber that enveloped them. Starting from the ground, I found +the risen moon shining upon the rugged face of the rock, and myself +all in a tremble. + + + +XXVII. MIDNIGHT + +It could not have been far from midnight when I came beneath +Hollingsworth's window, and, finding it open, flung in a tuft of +grass with earth at the roots, and heard it fall upon the floor. He +was either awake or sleeping very lightly; for scarcely a moment had +gone by before he looked out and discerned me standing in the +moonlight. + +"Is it you, Coverdale?" he asked. "What is the matter?" + +"Come down to me, Hollingsworth!" I answered. "I am anxious to +speak with you." + +The strange tone of my own voice startled me, and him, probably, no +less. He lost no time, and soon issued from the house-door, with his +dress half arranged. + +"Again, what is the matter?" he asked impatiently. + +"Have you seen Zenobia," said I, "since you parted from her at +Eliot's pulpit?" + +"No," answered Hollingsworth; "nor did I expect it." + +His voice was deep, but had a tremor in it, + +Hardly had he spoken, when Silas Foster thrust his head, done up in a +cotton handkerchief, out of another window, and took what he called +as it literally was--a squint at us. + +"Well, folks, what are ye about here?" he demanded. "Aha! are you +there, Miles Coverdale? You have been turning night into day since +you left us, I reckon; and so you find it quite natural to come +prowling about the house at this time o' night, frightening my old +woman out of her wits, and making her disturb a tired man out of his +best nap. In with you, you vagabond, and to bed!" + +"Dress yourself quickly, Foster," said I. "We want your assistance." + +I could not, for the life of me, keep that strange tone out of my +voice. Silas Foster, obtuse as were his sensibilities, seemed to +feel the ghastly earnestness that was conveyed in it as well as +Hollingsworth did. He immediately withdrew his head, and I heard him +yawning, muttering to his wife, and again yawning heavily, while he +hurried on his clothes. Meanwhile I showed Hollingsworth a delicate +handkerchief, marked with a well-known cipher, and told where I had +found it, and other circumstances, which had filled me with a +suspicion so terrible that I left him, if he dared, to shape it out +for himself. By the time my brief explanation was finished, we were +joined by Silas Foster in his blue woollen frock. + +"Well, boys," cried he peevishly, "what is to pay now?" + +"Tell him, Hollingsworth," said I. + +Hollingsworth shivered perceptibly, and drew in a hard breath betwixt +his teeth. He steadied himself, however, and, looking the matter +more firmly in the face than I had done, explained to Foster my +suspicions, and the grounds of them, with a distinctness from which, +in spite of my utmost efforts, my words had swerved aside. The +tough-nerved yeoman, in his comment, put a finish on the business, +and brought out the hideous idea in its full terror, as if he were +removing the napkin from the face of a corpse. + +"And so you think she's drowned herself?" he cried. I turned away my +face. + +"What on earth should the young woman do that for?" exclaimed Silas, +his eyes half out of his head with mere surprise. "Why, she has more +means than she can use or waste, and lacks nothing to make her +comfortable, but a husband, and that's an article she could have, any +day. There's some mistake about this, I tell you!" + +"Come," said I, shuddering; "let us go and ascertain the truth." + +"Well, well," answered Silas Foster; "just as you say. We'll take +the long pole, with the hook at the end, that serves to get the +bucket out of the draw-well when the rope is broken. With that, and +a couple of long-handled hay-rakes, I'll answer for finding her, if +she's anywhere to be found. Strange enough! Zenobia drown herself! +No, no; I don't believe it. She had too much sense, and too much +means, and enjoyed life a great deal too well." + +When our few preparations were completed, we hastened, by a shorter +than the customary route, through fields and pastures, and across a +portion of the meadow, to the particular spot on the river-bank which +I had paused to contemplate in the course of my afternoon's ramble. +A nameless presentiment had again drawn me thither, after leaving +Eliot's pulpit. I showed my companions where I had found the +handkerchief, and pointed to two or three footsteps, impressed into +the clayey margin, and tending towards the water. Beneath its +shallow verge, among the water-weeds, there were further traces, as +yet unobliterated by the sluggish current, which was there almost at +a standstill. Silas Foster thrust his face down close to these +footsteps, and picked up a shoe that had escaped my observation, +being half imbedded in the mud. + +"There's a kid shoe that never was made on a Yankee last," observed +he. "I know enough of shoemaker's craft to tell that. French +manufacture; and see what a high instep! and how evenly she trod in +it! There never was a woman that stept handsomer in her shoes than +Zenobia did. Here," he added, addressing Hollingsworth, "would you +like to keep the shoe?" + +Hollingsworth started back. + +"Give it to me, Foster," said I. + +I dabbled it in the water, to rinse off the mud, and have kept it +ever since. Not far from this spot lay an old, leaky punt, drawn up +on the oozy river-side, and generally half full of water. It served +the angler to go in quest of pickerel, or the sportsman to pick up +his wild ducks. Setting this crazy bark afloat, I seated myself in +the stern with the paddle, while Hollingsworth sat in the bows with +the hooked pole, and Silas Foster amidships with a hay-rake. + +"It puts me in mind of my young days," remarked Silas, "when I used +to steal out of bed to go bobbing for hornpouts and eels. Heigh-ho!-- +well, life and death together make sad work for us all! Then I was +a boy, bobbing for fish; and now I am getting to be an old fellow, +and here I be, groping for a dead body! I tell you what, lads; if I +thought anything had really happened to Zenobia, I should feel kind +o' sorrowful." + +"I wish, at least, you would hold your tongue," muttered I. + +The moon, that night, though past the full, was still large and oval, +and having risen between eight and nine o'clock, now shone aslantwise +over the river, throwing the high, opposite bank, with its woods, +into deep shadow, but lighting up the hither shore pretty effectually. +Not a ray appeared to fall on the river itself. It lapsed +imperceptibly away, a broad, black, inscrutable depth, keeping its +own secrets from the eye of man, as impenetrably as mid-ocean could. + +"Well, Miles Coverdale," said Foster, "you are the helmsman. How do +you mean to manage this business?" + +"I shall let the boat drift, broadside foremost, past that stump," I +replied. "I know the bottom, having sounded it in fishing. The +shore, on this side, after the first step or two, goes off very +abruptly; and there is a pool, just by the stump, twelve or fifteen +feet deep. The current could not have force enough to sweep any +sunken object, even if partially buoyant, out of that hollow." + +"Come, then," said Silas; "but I doubt whether I can touch bottom +with this hay-rake, if it's as deep as you say. Mr. Hollingsworth, I +think you'll be the lucky man to-night, such luck as it is." + +We floated past the stump. Silas Foster plied his rake manfully, +poking it as far as he could into the water, and immersing the whole +length of his arm besides. Hollingsworth at first sat motionless, +with the hooked pole elevated in the air. But, by and by, with a +nervous and jerky movement, he began to plunge it into the blackness +that upbore us, setting his teeth, and making precisely such thrusts, +methought, as if he were stabbing at a deadly enemy. I bent over the +side of the boat. So obscure, however, so awfully mysterious, was +that dark stream, that--and the thought made me shiver like a leaf--I +might as well have tried to look into the enigma of the eternal world, +to discover what had become of Zenobia's soul, as into the river's +depths, to find her body. And there, perhaps, she lay, with her face +upward, while the shadow of the boat, and my own pale face peering +downward, passed slowly betwixt her and the sky! + +Once, twice, thrice, I paddled the boat upstream, and again suffered +it to glide, with the river's slow, funereal motion, downward. Silas +Foster had raked up a large mass of stuff, which, as it came towards +the surface, looked somewhat like a flowing garment, but proved to be +a monstrous tuft of water-weeds. Hollingsworth, with a gigantic +effort, upheaved a sunken log. When once free of the bottom, it rose +partly out of water,--all weedy and slimy, a devilish-looking object, +which the moon had not shone upon for half a hundred years,--then +plunged again, and sullenly returned to its old resting-place, for +the remnant of the century. + +"That looked ugly!" quoth Silas. "I half thought it was the Evil One, +on the same errand as ourselves,--searching for Zenobia." + +"He shall never get her," said I, giving the boat a strong impulse. + +"That's not for you to say, my boy," retorted the yeoman. "Pray God +he never has, and never may. Slow work this, however! I should +really be glad to find something! Pshaw! What a notion that is, +when the only good luck would be to paddle, and drift, and poke, and +grope, hereabouts, till morning, and have our labor for our pains! +For my part, I shouldn't wonder if the creature had only lost her +shoe in the mud, and saved her soul alive, after all. My stars! how +she will laugh at us, to-morrow morning!" + +It is indescribable what an image of Zenobia--at the breakfast-table, +full of warm and mirthful life--this surmise of Silas Foster's +brought before my mind. The terrible phantasm of her death was +thrown by it into the remotest and dimmest background, where it +seemed to grow as improbable as a myth. + +"Yes, Silas, it may be as you say," cried I. The drift of the stream +had again borne us a little below the stump, when I felt--yes, felt, +for it was as if the iron hook had smote my breast--felt +Hollingsworth's pole strike some object at the bottom of the river! + +He started up, and almost overset the boat. + +"Hold on!" cried Foster; "you have her!" + +Putting a fury of strength into the effort, Hollingsworth heaved +amain, and up came a white swash to the surface of the river. It was +the flow of a woman's garments. A little higher, and we saw her dark +hair streaming down the current. Black River of Death, thou hadst +yielded up thy victim! Zenobia was found! + +Silas Foster laid hold of the body; Hollingsworth likewise grappled +with it; and I steered towards the bank, gazing all the while at +Zenobia, whose limbs were swaying in the current close at the boat's +side. Arriving near the shore, we all three stept into the water, +bore her out, and laid her on the ground beneath a tree. + +"Poor child!" said Foster,--and his dry old heart, I verily believe, +vouchsafed a tear, "I'm sorry for her!" + +Were I to describe the perfect horror of the spectacle, the reader +might justly reckon it to me for a sin and shame. For more than +twelve long years I have borne it in my memory, and could now +reproduce it as freshly as if it were still before my eyes. Of all +modes of death, methinks it is the ugliest. Her wet garments swathed +limbs of terrible inflexibility. She was the marble image of a +death-agony. Her arms had grown rigid in the act of struggling, and +were bent before her with clenched hands; her knees, too, were bent, +and--thank God for it!--in the attitude of prayer. Ah, that rigidity! +It is impossible to bear the terror of it. It seemed,--I must +needs impart so much of my own miserable idea,--it seemed as if her +body must keep the same position in the coffin, and that her skeleton +would keep it in the grave; and that when Zenobia rose at the day of +judgment, it would be in just the same attitude as now! + +One hope I had, and that too was mingled half with fear. She knelt +as if in prayer. With the last, choking consciousness, her soul, +bubbling out through her lips, it may be, had given itself up to the +Father, reconciled and penitent. But her arms! They were bent +before her, as if she struggled against Providence in never-ending +hostility. Her hands! They were clenched in immitigable defiance. +Away with the hideous thought. The flitting moment after Zenobia +sank into the dark pool--when her breath was gone, and her soul at +her lips was as long, in its capacity of God's infinite forgiveness, +as the lifetime of the world! + +Foster bent over the body, and carefully examined it. + +"You have wounded the poor thing's breast," said he to Hollingsworth, +"close by her heart, too!" + +"Ha!" cried Hollingsworth with a start. + +And so he had, indeed, both before and after death! + +"See!" said Foster. "That's the place where the iron struck her. It +looks cruelly, but she never felt it!" + +He endeavored to arrange the arms of the corpse decently by its side. +His utmost strength, however, scarcely sufficed to bring them down; +and rising again, the next instant, they bade him defiance, exactly +as before. He made another effort, with the same result. + +"In God's name, Silas Foster," cried I with bitter indignation. "let + +that dead woman alone!" + +"Why, man, it's not decent!" answered he, staring at me in amazement. +"I can't bear to see her looking so! Well, well," added he, after a +third effort, "'tis of no use, sure enough; and we must leave the +women to do their best with her, after we get to the house. The +sooner that's done, the better." + +We took two rails from a neighboring fence, and formed a bier by +laying across some boards from the bottom of the boat. And thus we +bore Zenobia homeward. Six hours before, how beautiful! At midnight, +what a horror! A reflection occurs to me that will show ludicrously, +I doubt not, on my page, but must come in for its sterling truth. +Being the woman that she was, could Zenobia have foreseen all these +ugly circumstances of death,--how ill it would become her, the +altogether unseemly aspect which she must put on, and especially old +Silas Foster's efforts to improve the matter,--she would no more have +committed the dreadful act than have exhibited herself to a public +assembly in a badly fitting garment! Zenobia, I have often thought, +was not quite simple in her death. She had seen pictures, I suppose, +of drowned persons in lithe and graceful attitudes. And she deemed +it well and decorous to die as so many village maidens have, wronged +in their first love, and seeking peace in the bosom of the old +familiar stream,--so familiar that they could not dread it,--where, +in childhood, they used to bathe their little feet, wading mid-leg +deep, unmindful of wet skirts. But in Zenobia's case there was some +tint of the Arcadian affectation that had been visible enough in all +our lives for a few months past. + +This, however, to my conception, takes nothing from the tragedy. For, +has not the world come to an awfully sophisticated pass, when, after +a certain degree of acquaintance with it, we cannot even put +ourselves to death in whole-hearted simplicity? Slowly, slowly, with +many a dreary pause,--resting the bier often on some rock or +balancing it across a mossy log, to take fresh hold,--we bore our +burden onward through the moonlight, and at last laid Zenobia on the +floor of the old farmhouse. By and by came three or four withered +women and stood whispering around the corpse, peering at it through +their spectacles, holding up their skinny hands, shaking their +night-capped heads, and taking counsel of one another's experience +what was to be done. + +With those tire-women we left Zenobia. + + + +XXVIII. BLITHEDALE PASTURE + +Blithedale, thus far in its progress, had never found the necessity +of a burial-ground. There was some consultation among us in what +spot Zenobia might most fitly be laid. It was my own wish that she +should sleep at the base of Eliot's pulpit, and that on the rugged +front of the rock the name by which we familiarly knew her, Zenobia,-- +and not another word, should be deeply cut, and left for the moss +and lichens to fill up at their long leisure. But Hollingsworth (to +whose ideas on this point great deference was due) made it his +request that her grave might be dug on the gently sloping hillside, +in the wide pasture, where, as we once supposed, Zenobia and he had +planned to build their cottage. And thus it was done, accordingly. + +She was buried very much as other people have been for hundreds of +years gone by. In anticipation of a death, we Blithedale colonists +had sometimes set our fancies at work to arrange a funereal ceremony, +which should be the proper symbolic expression of our spiritual faith +and eternal hopes; and this we meant to substitute for those +customary rites which were moulded originally out of the Gothic gloom, +and by long use, like an old velvet pall, have so much more than +their first death-smell in them. But when the occasion came we found +it the simplest and truest thing, after all, to content ourselves +with the old fashion, taking away what we could, but interpolating no +novelties, and particularly avoiding all frippery of flowers and +cheerful emblems. The procession moved from the farmhouse. Nearest +the dead walked an old man in deep mourning, his face mostly +concealed in a white handkerchief, and with Priscilla leaning on his +arm. Hollingsworth and myself came next. We all stood around the +narrow niche in the cold earth; all saw the coffin lowered in; all +heard the rattle of the crumbly soil upon its lid,--that final sound, +which mortality awakens on the utmost verge of sense, as if in the +vain hope of bringing an echo from the spiritual world. + +I noticed a stranger,--a stranger to most of those present, though +known to me,--who, after the coffin had descended, took up a handful +of earth and flung it first into the grave. I had given up +Hollingsworth's arm, and now found myself near this man. + +"It was an idle thing--a foolish thing--for Zenobia to do," said he. +"She was the last woman in the world to whom death could have been +necessary. It was too absurd! I have no patience with her." + +"Why so?" I inquired, smothering my horror at his cold comment, in +my eager curiosity to discover some tangible truth as to his relation +with Zenobia. "If any crisis could justify the sad wrong she offered +to herself, it was surely that in which she stood. Everything had +failed her; prosperity in the world's sense, for her opulence was +gone,--the heart's prosperity, in love. And there was a secret +burden on her, the nature of which is best known to you. Young as +she was, she had tried life fully, had no more to hope, and something, +perhaps, to fear. Had Providence taken her away in its own holy +hand, I should have thought it the kindest dispensation that could be +awarded to one so wrecked." + +"You mistake the matter completely," rejoined Westervelt. + +"What, then, is your own view of it?" I asked. + +"Her mind was active, and various in its powers," said he. "Her +heart had a manifold adaptation; her constitution an infinite +buoyancy, which (had she possessed only a little patience to await +the reflux of her troubles) would have borne her upward triumphantly +for twenty years to come. Her beauty would not have waned--or +scarcely so, and surely not beyond the reach of art to restore it--in +all that time. She had life's summer all before her, and a hundred +varieties of brilliant success. What an actress Zenobia might have +been! It was one of her least valuable capabilities. How forcibly +she might have wrought upon the world, either directly in her own +person, or by her influence upon some man, or a series of men, of +controlling genius! Every prize that could be worth a woman's +having--and many prizes which other women are too timid to +desire--lay within Zenobia's reach." + +"In all this," I observed, "there would have been nothing to satisfy +her heart." + +"Her heart!" answered Westervelt contemptuously. "That troublesome +organ (as she had hitherto found it) would have been kept in its due +place and degree, and have had all the gratification it could fairly +claim. She would soon have established a control over it. Love had +failed her, you say. Had it never failed her before? Yet she +survived it, and loved again,--possibly not once alone, nor twice +either. And now to drown herself for yonder dreamy philanthropist!" + +"Who are you," I exclaimed indignantly, "that dare to speak thus of +the dead? You seem to intend a eulogy, yet leave out whatever was +noblest in her, and blacken while you mean to praise. I have long +considered you as Zenobia's evil fate. Your sentiments confirm me in +the idea, but leave me still ignorant as to the mode in which you +have influenced her life. The connection may have been indissoluble, +except by death. Then, indeed,--always in the hope of God's infinite +mercy,--I cannot deem it a misfortune that she sleeps in yonder grave!" + +"No matter what I was to her," he answered gloomily, yet without +actual emotion. "She is now beyond my reach. Had she lived, and +hearkened to my counsels, we might have served each other well. But +there Zenobia lies in yonder pit, with the dull earth over her. +Twenty years of a brilliant lifetime thrown away for a mere woman's +whim!" + +Heaven deal with Westervelt according to his nature and deserts!-- +that is to say, annihilate him. He was altogether earthy, worldly, +made for time and its gross objects, and incapable--except by a sort +of dim reflection caught from other minds--of so much as one +spiritual idea. Whatever stain Zenobia had was caught from him; nor +does it seldom happen that a character of admirable qualities loses +its better life because the atmosphere that should sustain it is +rendered poisonous by such breath as this man mingled with Zenobia's. +Yet his reflections possessed their share of truth. It was a woeful +thought, that a woman of Zenobia's diversified capacity should have +fancied herself irretrievably defeated on the broad battlefield of +life, and with no refuge, save to fall on her own sword, merely +because Love had gone against her. It is nonsense, and a miserable +wrong,--the result, like so many others, of masculine egotism,--that +the success or failure of woman's existence should be made to depend +wholly on the affections, and on one species of affection, while man +has such a multitude of other chances, that this seems but an +incident. For its own sake, if it will do no more, the world should +throw open all its avenues to the passport of a woman's bleeding +heart. + +As we stood around the grave, I looked often towards Priscilla, +dreading to see her wholly overcome with grief. And deeply grieved, +in truth, she was. But a character so simply constituted as hers has +room only for a single predominant affection. No other feeling can +touch the heart's inmost core, nor do it any deadly mischief. Thus, +while we see that such a being responds to every breeze with +tremulous vibration, and imagine that she must be shattered by the +first rude blast, we find her retaining her equilibrium amid shocks +that might have overthrown many a sturdier frame. So with Priscilla; +her one possible misfortune was Hollingsworth's unkindness; and that +was destined never to befall her, never yet, at least, for Priscilla +has not died. + +But Hollingsworth! After all the evil that he did, are we to leave +him thus, blest with the entire devotion of this one true heart, and +with wealth at his disposal to execute the long-contemplated project +that had led him so far astray? What retribution is there here? My +mind being vexed with precisely this query, I made a journey, some +years since, for the sole purpose of catching a last glimpse of +Hollingsworth, and judging for myself whether he were a happy man or +no. I learned that he inhabited a small cottage, that his way of +life was exceedingly retired, and that my only chance of encountering +him or Priscilla was to meet them in a secluded lane, where, in the +latter part of the afternoon, they were accustomed to walk. I did +meet them, accordingly. As they approached me, I observed in +Hollingsworth's face a depressed and melancholy look, that seemed +habitual; the powerfully built man showed a self-distrustful weakness, +and a childlike or childish tendency to press close, and closer +still, to the side of the slender woman whose arm was within his. In +Priscilla's manner there was a protective and watchful quality, as if +she felt herself the guardian of her companion; but, likewise, a deep, +submissive, unquestioning reverence, and also a veiled happiness in +her fair and quiet countenance. + +Drawing nearer, Priscilla recognized me, and gave me a kind and +friendly smile, but with a slight gesture, which I could not help +interpreting as an entreaty not to make myself known to Hollingsworth. +Nevertheless, an impulse took possession of me, and compelled me to +address him. + +"I have come, Hollingsworth," said I, "to view your grand edifice for +the reformation of criminals. Is it finished yet?" + +"No, nor begun," answered he, without raising his eyes. "A very +small one answers all my purposes." + +Priscilla threw me an upbraiding glance. But I spoke again, with a +bitter and revengeful emotion, as if flinging a poisoned arrow at +Hollingsworth's heart. + +"Up to this moment," I inquired, "how many criminals have you +reformed?" + +"Not one," said Hollingsworth, with his eyes still fixed on the +ground. "Ever since we parted, I have been busy with a single +murderer." + +Then the tears gushed into my eyes, and I forgave him; for I +remembered the wild energy, the passionate shriek, with which Zenobia +had spoken those words, "Tell him he has murdered me! Tell him that +I'll haunt him!"--and I knew what murderer he meant, and whose +vindictive shadow dogged the side where Priscilla was not. + +The moral which presents itself to my reflections, as drawn from +Hollingsworth's character and errors, is simply this, that, admitting +what is called philanthropy, when adopted as a profession, to be +often useful by its energetic impulse to society at large, it is +perilous to the individual whose ruling passion, in one exclusive +channel, it thus becomes. It ruins, or is fearfully apt to ruin, the +heart, the rich juices of which God never meant should be pressed +violently out and distilled into alcoholic liquor by an unnatural +process, but should render life sweet, bland, and gently beneficent, +and insensibly influence other hearts and other lives to the same +blessed end. I see in Hollingsworth an exemplification of the most +awful truth in Bunyan's book of such, from the very gate of heaven +there is a by-way to the pit! + +But, all this while, we have been standing by Zenobia's grave. I +have never since beheld it, but make no question that the grass grew +all the better, on that little parallelogram of pasture land, for the +decay of the beautiful woman who slept beneath. How Nature seems to +love us! And how readily, nevertheless, without a sigh or a +complaint, she converts us to a meaner purpose, when her highest +one--that of a conscious intellectual life and sensibility has been +untimely balked! While Zenobia lived, Nature was proud of her, and +directed all eyes upon that radiant presence, as her fairest +handiwork. Zenobia perished. Will not Nature shed a tear? Ah, no!-- +she adopts the calamity at once into her system, and is just as +well pleased, for aught we can see, with the tuft of ranker +vegetation that grew out of Zenobia's heart, as with all the beauty +which has bequeathed us no earthly representative except in this crop +of weeds. It is because the spirit is inestimable that the lifeless +body is so little valued. + + + +XXIX. MILES COVERDALE'S CONFESSION + +It remains only to say a few words about myself. Not improbably, the +reader might be willing to spare me the trouble; for I have made but +a poor and dim figure in my own narrative, establishing no separate +interest, and suffering my colorless life to take its hue from other +lives. But one still retains some little consideration for one's +self; so I keep these last two or three pages for my individual and +sole behoof. + +But what, after all, have I to tell? Nothing, nothing, nothing! I +left Blithedale within the week after Zenobia's death, and went back +thither no more. The whole soil of our farm, for a long time +afterwards, seemed but the sodded earth over her grave. I could not +toil there, nor live upon its products. Often, however, in these +years that are darkening around me, I remember our beautiful scheme +of a noble and unselfish life; and how fair, in that first summer, +appeared the prospect that it might endure for generations, and be +perfected, as the ages rolled away, into the system of a people and a +world! Were my former associates now there,--were there only three +or four of those true-hearted men still laboring in the sun,--I +sometimes fancy that I should direct my world-weary footsteps +thitherward, and entreat them to receive me, for old friendship's +sake. More and more I feel that we had struck upon what ought to be +a truth. Posterity may dig it up, and profit by it. The experiment, +so far as its original projectors were concerned, proved, long ago, a +failure; first lapsing into Fourierism, and dying, as it well +deserved, for this infidelity to its own higher spirit. Where once +we toiled with our whole hopeful hearts, the town paupers, aged, +nerveless, and disconsolate, creep sluggishly afield. Alas, what +faith is requisite to bear up against such results of generous effort! + +My subsequent life has passed,--I was going to say happily, but, at +all events, tolerably enough. I am now at middle age, well, well, a +step or two beyond the midmost point, and I care not a fig who knows +it!--a bachelor, with no very decided purpose of ever being otherwise. +I have been twice to Europe, and spent a year or two rather +agreeably at each visit. Being well to do in the world, and having +nobody but myself to care for, I live very much at my ease, and fare +sumptuously every day. As for poetry, I have given it up, +notwithstanding that Dr. Griswold--as the reader, of course, +knows--has placed me at a fair elevation among our minor minstrelsy, +on the strength of my pretty little volume, published ten years ago. +As regards human progress (in spite of my irrepressible yearnings +over the Blithedale reminiscences), let them believe in it who can, +and aid in it who choose. If I could earnestly do either, it might +be all the better for my comfort. As Hollingsworth once told me, I +lack a purpose. How strange! He was ruined, morally, by an overplus +of the very same ingredient, the want of which, I occasionally +suspect, has rendered my own life all an emptiness. I by no means +wish to die. Yet, were there any cause, in this whole chaos of human +struggle, worth a sane man's dying for, and which my death would +benefit, then--provided, however, the effort did not involve an +unreasonable amount of trouble--methinks I might be bold to offer up +my life. If Kossuth, for example, would pitch the battlefield of +Hungarian rights within an easy ride of my abode, and choose a mild, +sunny morning, after breakfast, for the conflict, Miles Coverdale +would gladly be his man, for one brave rush upon the levelled +bayonets. Further than that, I should be loath to pledge myself. + +I exaggerate my own defects. The reader must not take my own word +for it, nor believe me altogether changed from the young man who once +hoped strenuously, and struggled not so much amiss. Frostier heads +than mine have gained honor in the world; frostier hearts have +imbibed new warmth, and been newly happy. Life, however, it must be +owned, has come to rather an idle pass with me. Would my friends +like to know what brought it thither? There is one secret,--I have +concealed it all along, and never meant to let the least whisper of +it escape,--one foolish little secret, which possibly may have had +something to do with these inactive years of meridian manhood, with +my bachelorship, with the unsatisfied retrospect that I fling back on +life, and my listless glance towards the future. Shall I reveal it? +It is an absurd thing for a man in his afternoon,--a man of the world, +moreover, with these three white hairs in his brown mustache and +that deepening track of a crow's-foot on each temple,--an absurd +thing ever to have happened, and quite the absurdest for an old +bachelor, like me, to talk about. But it rises to my throat; so let +it come. + +I perceive, moreover, that the confession, brief as it shall be, will +throw a gleam of light over my behavior throughout the foregoing +incidents, and is, indeed, essential to the full understanding of my +story. The reader, therefore, since I have disclosed so much, is +entitled to this one word more. As I write it, he will charitably +suppose me to blush, and turn away my face: + +I--I myself--was in love--with--Priscilla! + + + + +End of this Project Gutenberg Etext of "The Blithedale Romance" by +Nathaniel Hawthorne + |