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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Sonnets from the Portuguese, by Elizabeth
+Barrett Browning
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
+other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
+whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
+the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
+www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
+to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
+
+
+
+
+Title: Sonnets from the Portuguese
+
+
+Author: Elizabeth Barrett Browning
+
+
+
+Release Date: January 13, 2015 [eBook #2002]
+[This file was first posted on April 20, 1999]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: UTF-8
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK SONNETS FROM THE PORTUGUESE***
+
+
+Transcribed from the 1906 Caradoc Press edition by David Price, email
+ccx074@pglaf.org
+
+ [Picture: Book cover]
+
+
+
+
+
+ SONNETS FROM THE
+ PORTUGUESE
+
+
+ * * * * *
+
+ BY
+ ELIZABETH
+ BARRETT BROWNING
+
+ * * * * *
+
+ [Picture: Decorative graphic]
+
+ THE CARADOC PRESS BEDFORD PARK
+ CHISWICK LONDON MDCCCCVI
+
+
+
+
+INDEX OF FIRST LINES
+
+ I I thought once how Theocritus had sung
+ II But only three in all God’s universe
+ III Unlike are we, unlike, O princely Heart!
+ IV Thou hast thy calling to some palace-floor
+ V I lift my heavy heart up solemnly
+ VI Go from me. Yet I feel that I shall stand
+ VII The face of all the world is changed, I think
+ VIII What can I give thee back, O liberal
+ IX Can it be right to give what I can give?
+ X Yet, love, mere love, is beautiful indeed
+ XI And therefore if to love can be desert
+ XII Indeed this very love which is my boast
+ XIII And wilt thou have me fashion into speech
+ XIV If thou must love me, let it be for nought
+ XV Accuse me not, beseech thee, that I wear
+ XVI And yet, because thou overcomest so
+ XVII My poet thou canst touch on all the notes
+ XVIII I never gave a lock of hair away
+ XIX The soul’s Rialto hath its merchandize
+ XX Beloved, my beloved, when I think
+ XXI Say over again, and yet once over again
+ XXII When our two souls stand up erect and strong
+ XXIII Is it indeed so? If I lay here dead
+ XXIV Let the world’s sharpness like a clasping knife
+ XXV A heavy heart, Beloved, have I borne
+ XXVI I lived with visions for my company
+ XXVII My own Beloved, who hast lifted me
+ XXVIII My letters! all dead paper, mute and white!
+ XXIX I think of thee!—my thoughts do twine and bud
+ XXX I see thine image through my tears to-night
+ XXXI Thou comest! all is said without a word
+ XXXII The first time that the sun rose on thine oath
+ XXXIII Yes, call me by my pet-name! let me hear
+ XXXIV With the same heart, I said, I’ll answer thee
+ XXXV If I leave all for thee, wilt thou exchange
+ XXXVI When we met first and loved, I did not build
+ XXXVII Pardon, oh, pardon, that my soul should make
+ XXXVIII First time he kissed me, he but only kissed
+ XXXIX Because thou hast the power and own’st the grace
+ XL Oh, yes! they love through all this world of ours!
+ XLI I thank all who have loved me in their hearts
+ XLII My future will not copy fair my past
+ XLIII How do I love thee? Let me count the ways
+ XLIV Beloved, thou hast brought me many flowers
+
+
+
+
+I
+
+
+ I thought once how Theocritus had sung
+ Of the sweet years, the dear and wished-for years,
+ Who each one in a gracious hand appears
+ To bear a gift for mortals, old or young:
+ And, as I mused it in his antique tongue,
+ I saw, in gradual vision through my tears,
+ The sweet, sad years, the melancholy years,
+ Those of my own life, who by turns had flung
+ A shadow across me. Straightway I was ’ware,
+ So weeping, how a mystic Shape did move
+ Behind me, and drew me backward by the hair;
+ And a voice said in mastery, while I strove,—
+ “Guess now who holds thee!”—“Death,” I said, But, there,
+ The silver answer rang, “Not Death, but Love.”
+
+
+
+
+II
+
+
+ But only three in all God’s universe
+ Have heard this word thou hast said,—Himself, beside
+ Thee speaking, and me listening! and replied
+ One of us . . . that was God, . . . and laid the curse
+ So darkly on my eyelids, as to amerce
+ My sight from seeing thee,—that if I had died,
+ The death-weights, placed there, would have signified
+ Less absolute exclusion. “Nay” is worse
+ From God than from all others, O my friend!
+ Men could not part us with their worldly jars,
+ Nor the seas change us, nor the tempests bend;
+ Our hands would touch for all the mountain-bars:
+ And, heaven being rolled between us at the end,
+ We should but vow the faster for the stars.
+
+
+
+
+III
+
+
+ Unlike are we, unlike, O princely Heart!
+ Unlike our uses and our destinies.
+ Our ministering two angels look surprise
+ On one another, as they strike athwart
+ Their wings in passing. Thou, bethink thee, art
+ A guest for queens to social pageantries,
+ With gages from a hundred brighter eyes
+ Than tears even can make mine, to play thy part
+ Of chief musician. What hast thou to do
+ With looking from the lattice-lights at me,
+ A poor, tired, wandering singer, singing through
+ The dark, and leaning up a cypress tree?
+ The chrism is on thine head,—on mine, the dew,—
+ And Death must dig the level where these agree.
+
+
+
+
+IV
+
+
+ Thou hast thy calling to some palace-floor,
+ Most gracious singer of high poems! where
+ The dancers will break footing, from the care
+ Of watching up thy pregnant lips for more.
+ And dost thou lift this house’s latch too poor
+ For hand of thine? and canst thou think and bear
+ To let thy music drop here unaware
+ In folds of golden fulness at my door?
+ Look up and see the casement broken in,
+ The bats and owlets builders in the roof!
+ My cricket chirps against thy mandolin.
+ Hush, call no echo up in further proof
+ Of desolation! there’s a voice within
+ That weeps . . . as thou must sing . . . alone, aloof.
+
+
+
+
+V
+
+
+ I lift my heavy heart up solemnly,
+ As once Electra her sepulchral urn,
+ And, looking in thine eyes, I over-turn
+ The ashes at thy feet. Behold and see
+ What a great heap of grief lay hid in me,
+ And how the red wild sparkles dimly burn
+ Through the ashen greyness. If thy foot in scorn
+ Could tread them out to darkness utterly,
+ It might be well perhaps. But if instead
+ Thou wait beside me for the wind to blow
+ The grey dust up, . . . those laurels on thine head,
+ O my Belovëd, will not shield thee so,
+ That none of all the fires shall scorch and shred
+ The hair beneath. Stand further off then! go!
+
+
+
+
+VI
+
+
+ Go from me. Yet I feel that I shall stand
+ Henceforward in thy shadow. Nevermore
+ Alone upon the threshold of my door
+ Of individual life, I shall command
+ The uses of my soul, nor lift my hand
+ Serenely in the sunshine as before,
+ Without the sense of that which I forbore—
+ Thy touch upon the palm. The widest land
+ Doom takes to part us, leaves thy heart in mine
+ With pulses that beat double. What I do
+ And what I dream include thee, as the wine
+ Must taste of its own grapes. And when I sue
+ God for myself, He hears that name of thine,
+ And sees within my eyes the tears of two.
+
+
+
+
+VII
+
+
+ The face of all the world is changed, I think,
+ Since first I heard the footsteps of thy soul
+ Move still, oh, still, beside me, as they stole
+ Betwixt me and the dreadful outer brink
+ Of obvious death, where I, who thought to sink,
+ Was caught up into love, and taught the whole
+ Of life in a new rhythm. The cup of dole
+ God gave for baptism, I am fain to drink,
+ And praise its sweetness, Sweet, with thee anear.
+ The names of country, heaven, are changed away
+ For where thou art or shalt be, there or here;
+ And this . . . this lute and song . . . loved yesterday,
+ (The singing angels know) are only dear
+ Because thy name moves right in what they say.
+
+
+
+
+VIII
+
+
+ What can I give thee back, O liberal
+ And princely giver, who hast brought the gold
+ And purple of thine heart, unstained, untold,
+ And laid them on the outside of the wall
+ For such as I to take or leave withal,
+ In unexpected largesse? am I cold,
+ Ungrateful, that for these most manifold
+ High gifts, I render nothing back at all?
+ Not so; not cold,—but very poor instead.
+ Ask God who knows. For frequent tears have run
+ The colours from my life, and left so dead
+ And pale a stuff, it were not fitly done
+ To give the same as pillow to thy head.
+ Go farther! let it serve to trample on.
+
+
+
+
+IX
+
+
+ Can it be right to give what I can give?
+ To let thee sit beneath the fall of tears
+ As salt as mine, and hear the sighing years
+ Re-sighing on my lips renunciative
+ Through those infrequent smiles which fail to live
+ For all thy adjurations? O my fears,
+ That this can scarce be right! We are not peers
+ So to be lovers; and I own, and grieve,
+ That givers of such gifts as mine are, must
+ Be counted with the ungenerous. Out, alas!
+ I will not soil thy purple with my dust,
+ Nor breathe my poison on thy Venice-glass,
+ Nor give thee any love—which were unjust.
+ Beloved, I only love thee! let it pass.
+
+
+
+
+X
+
+
+ Yet, love, mere love, is beautiful indeed
+ And worthy of acceptation. Fire is bright,
+ Let temple burn, or flax; an equal light
+ Leaps in the flame from cedar-plank or weed:
+ And love is fire. And when I say at need
+ I love thee . . . mark! . . . I love thee—in thy sight
+ I stand transfigured, glorified aright,
+ With conscience of the new rays that proceed
+ Out of my face toward thine. There’s nothing low
+ In love, when love the lowest: meanest creatures
+ Who love God, God accepts while loving so.
+ And what I feel, across the inferior features
+ Of what I am, doth flash itself, and show
+ How that great work of Love enhances Nature’s.
+
+
+
+
+XI
+
+
+ And therefore if to love can be desert,
+ I am not all unworthy. Cheeks as pale
+ As these you see, and trembling knees that fail
+ To bear the burden of a heavy heart,—
+ This weary minstrel-life that once was girt
+ To climb Aornus, and can scarce avail
+ To pipe now ’gainst the valley nightingale
+ A melancholy music,—why advert
+ To these things? O Belovëd, it is plain
+ I am not of thy worth nor for thy place!
+ And yet, because I love thee, I obtain
+ From that same love this vindicating grace
+ To live on still in love, and yet in vain,—
+ To bless thee, yet renounce thee to thy face.
+
+
+
+
+XII
+
+
+ Indeed this very love which is my boast,
+ And which, when rising up from breast to brow,
+ Doth crown me with a ruby large enow
+ To draw men’s eyes and prove the inner cost,—
+ This love even, all my worth, to the uttermost,
+ I should not love withal, unless that thou
+ Hadst set me an example, shown me how,
+ When first thine earnest eyes with mine were crossed,
+ And love called love. And thus, I cannot speak
+ Of love even, as a good thing of my own:
+ Thy soul hath snatched up mine all faint and weak,
+ And placed it by thee on a golden throne,—
+ And that I love (O soul, we must be meek!)
+ Is by thee only, whom I love alone.
+
+
+
+
+XIII
+
+
+ And wilt thou have me fashion into speech
+ The love I bear thee, finding words enough,
+ And hold the torch out, while the winds are rough,
+ Between our faces, to cast light on each?—
+ I drop it at thy feet. I cannot teach
+ My hand to hold my spirits so far off
+ From myself—me—that I should bring thee proof
+ In words, of love hid in me out of reach.
+ Nay, let the silence of my womanhood
+ Commend my woman-love to thy belief,—
+ Seeing that I stand unwon, however wooed,
+ And rend the garment of my life, in brief,
+ By a most dauntless, voiceless fortitude,
+ Lest one touch of this heart convey its grief.
+
+
+
+
+XIV
+
+
+ If thou must love me, let it be for nought
+ Except for love’s sake only. Do not say
+ “I love her for her smile—her look—her way
+ Of speaking gently,—for a trick of thought
+ That falls in well with mine, and certes brought
+ A sense of pleasant ease on such a day”—
+ For these things in themselves, Belovëd, may
+ Be changed, or change for thee,—and love, so wrought,
+ May be unwrought so. Neither love me for
+ Thine own dear pity’s wiping my cheeks dry,—
+ A creature might forget to weep, who bore
+ Thy comfort long, and lose thy love thereby!
+ But love me for love’s sake, that evermore
+ Thou may’st love on, through love’s eternity.
+
+
+
+
+XV
+
+
+ Accuse me not, beseech thee, that I wear
+ Too calm and sad a face in front of thine;
+ For we two look two ways, and cannot shine
+ With the same sunlight on our brow and hair.
+ On me thou lookest with no doubting care,
+ As on a bee shut in a crystalline;
+ Since sorrow hath shut me safe in love’s divine,
+ And to spread wing and fly in the outer air
+ Were most impossible failure, if I strove
+ To fail so. But I look on thee—on thee—
+ Beholding, besides love, the end of love,
+ Hearing oblivion beyond memory;
+ As one who sits and gazes from above,
+ Over the rivers to the bitter sea.
+
+
+
+
+XVI
+
+
+ And yet, because thou overcomest so,
+ Because thou art more noble and like a king,
+ Thou canst prevail against my fears and fling
+ Thy purple round me, till my heart shall grow
+ Too close against thine heart henceforth to know
+ How it shook when alone. Why, conquering
+ May prove as lordly and complete a thing
+ In lifting upward, as in crushing low!
+ And as a vanquished soldier yields his sword
+ To one who lifts him from the bloody earth,
+ Even so, Belovëd, I at last record,
+ Here ends my strife. If thou invite me forth,
+ I rise above abasement at the word.
+ Make thy love larger to enlarge my worth!
+
+
+
+
+XVII
+
+
+ My poet, thou canst touch on all the notes
+ God set between His After and Before,
+ And strike up and strike off the general roar
+ Of the rushing worlds a melody that floats
+ In a serene air purely. Antidotes
+ Of medicated music, answering for
+ Mankind’s forlornest uses, thou canst pour
+ From thence into their ears. God’s will devotes
+ Thine to such ends, and mine to wait on thine.
+ How, Dearest, wilt thou have me for most use?
+ A hope, to sing by gladly? or a fine
+ Sad memory, with thy songs to interfuse?
+ A shade, in which to sing—of palm or pine?
+ A grave, on which to rest from singing? Choose.
+
+
+
+
+XVIII
+
+
+ I never gave a lock of hair away
+ To a man, Dearest, except this to thee,
+ Which now upon my fingers thoughtfully
+ I ring out to the full brown length and say
+ “Take it.” My day of youth went yesterday;
+ My hair no longer bounds to my foot’s glee,
+ Nor plant I it from rose- or myrtle-tree,
+ As girls do, any more: it only may
+ Now shade on two pale cheeks the mark of tears,
+ Taught drooping from the head that hangs aside
+ Through sorrow’s trick. I thought the funeral-shears
+ Would take this first, but Love is justified,—
+ Take it thou,—finding pure, from all those years,
+ The kiss my mother left here when she died.
+
+
+
+
+XIX
+
+
+ The soul’s Rialto hath its merchandize;
+ I barter curl for curl upon that mart,
+ And from my poet’s forehead to my heart
+ Receive this lock which outweighs argosies,—
+ As purply black, as erst to Pindar’s eyes
+ The dim purpureal tresses gloomed athwart
+ The nine white Muse-brows. For this counterpart, . . .
+ The bay crown’s shade, Belovëd, I surmise,
+ Still lingers on thy curl, it is so black!
+ Thus, with a fillet of smooth-kissing breath,
+ I tie the shadows safe from gliding back,
+ And lay the gift where nothing hindereth;
+ Here on my heart, as on thy brow, to lack
+ No natural heat till mine grows cold in death.
+
+
+
+
+XX
+
+
+ Belovëd, my Belovëd, when I think
+ That thou wast in the world a year ago,
+ What time I sat alone here in the snow
+ And saw no footprint, heard the silence sink
+ No moment at thy voice, but, link by link,
+ Went counting all my chains as if that so
+ They never could fall off at any blow
+ Struck by thy possible hand,—why, thus I drink
+ Of life’s great cup of wonder! Wonderful,
+ Never to feel thee thrill the day or night
+ With personal act or speech,—nor ever cull
+ Some prescience of thee with the blossoms white
+ Thou sawest growing! Atheists are as dull,
+ Who cannot guess God’s presence out of sight.
+
+
+
+
+XXI
+
+
+ Say over again, and yet once over again,
+ That thou dost love me. Though the word repeated
+ Should seem a “cuckoo-song,” as thou dost treat it,
+ Remember, never to the hill or plain,
+ Valley and wood, without her cuckoo-strain
+ Comes the fresh Spring in all her green completed.
+ Belovëd, I, amid the darkness greeted
+ By a doubtful spirit-voice, in that doubt’s pain
+ Cry, “Speak once more—thou lovest!” Who can fear
+ Too many stars, though each in heaven shall roll,
+ Too many flowers, though each shall crown the year?
+ Say thou dost love me, love me, love me—toll
+ The silver iterance!—only minding, Dear,
+ To love me also in silence with thy soul.
+
+
+
+
+XXII
+
+
+ When our two souls stand up erect and strong,
+ Face to face, silent, drawing nigh and nigher,
+ Until the lengthening wings break into fire
+ At either curvëd point,—what bitter wrong
+ Can the earth do to us, that we should not long
+ Be here contented? Think! In mounting higher,
+ The angels would press on us and aspire
+ To drop some golden orb of perfect song
+ Into our deep, dear silence. Let us stay
+ Rather on earth, Belovëd,—where the unfit
+ Contrarious moods of men recoil away
+ And isolate pure spirits, and permit
+ A place to stand and love in for a day,
+ With darkness and the death-hour rounding it.
+
+
+
+
+XXIII
+
+
+ Is it indeed so? If I lay here dead,
+ Wouldst thou miss any life in losing mine?
+ And would the sun for thee more coldly shine
+ Because of grave-damps falling round my head?
+ I marvelled, my Belovëd, when I read
+ Thy thought so in the letter. I am thine—
+ But . . . so much to thee? Can I pour thy wine
+ While my hands tremble? Then my soul, instead
+ Of dreams of death, resumes life’s lower range.
+ Then, love me, Love! look on me—breathe on me!
+ As brighter ladies do not count it strange,
+ For love, to give up acres and degree,
+ I yield the grave for thy sake, and exchange
+ My near sweet view of heaven, for earth with thee!
+
+
+
+
+XXIV
+
+
+ Let the world’s sharpness like a clasping knife
+ Shut in upon itself and do no harm
+ In this close hand of Love, now soft and warm,
+ And let us hear no sound of human strife
+ After the click of the shutting. Life to life—
+ I lean upon thee, Dear, without alarm,
+ And feel as safe as guarded by a charm
+ Against the stab of worldlings, who if rife
+ Are weak to injure. Very whitely still
+ The lilies of our lives may reassure
+ Their blossoms from their roots, accessible
+ Alone to heavenly dews that drop not fewer;
+ Growing straight, out of man’s reach, on the hill.
+ God only, who made us rich, can make us poor.
+
+
+
+
+XXV
+
+
+ A heavy heart, Belovëd, have I borne
+ From year to year until I saw thy face,
+ And sorrow after sorrow took the place
+ Of all those natural joys as lightly worn
+ As the stringed pearls, each lifted in its turn
+ By a beating heart at dance-time. Hopes apace
+ Were changed to long despairs, till God’s own grace
+ Could scarcely lift above the world forlorn
+ My heavy heart. Then thou didst bid me bring
+ And let it drop adown thy calmly great
+ Deep being! Fast it sinketh, as a thing
+ Which its own nature does precipitate,
+ While thine doth close above it, mediating
+ Betwixt the stars and the unaccomplished fate.
+
+
+
+
+XXVI
+
+
+ I lived with visions for my company
+ Instead of men and women, years ago,
+ And found them gentle mates, nor thought to know
+ A sweeter music than they played to me.
+ But soon their trailing purple was not free
+ Of this world’s dust, their lutes did silent grow,
+ And I myself grew faint and blind below
+ Their vanishing eyes. Then thou didst come—to be,
+ Belovëd, what they seemed. Their shining fronts,
+ Their songs, their splendours, (better, yet the same,
+ As river-water hallowed into fonts)
+ Met in thee, and from out thee overcame
+ My soul with satisfaction of all wants:
+ Because God’s gifts put man’s best dreams to shame.
+
+
+
+
+XXVII
+
+
+ My own Belovëd, who hast lifted me
+ From this drear flat of earth where I was thrown,
+ And, in betwixt the languid ringlets, blown
+ A life-breath, till the forehead hopefully
+ Shines out again, as all the angels see,
+ Before thy saving kiss! My own, my own,
+ Who camest to me when the world was gone,
+ And I who looked for only God, found thee!
+ I find thee; I am safe, and strong, and glad.
+ As one who stands in dewless asphodel,
+ Looks backward on the tedious time he had
+ In the upper life,—so I, with bosom-swell,
+ Make witness, here, between the good and bad,
+ That Love, as strong as Death, retrieves as well.
+
+
+
+
+XXVIII
+
+
+ My letters! all dead paper, mute and white!
+ And yet they seem alive and quivering
+ Against my tremulous hands which loose the string
+ And let them drop down on my knee to-night.
+ This said,—he wished to have me in his sight
+ Once, as a friend: this fixed a day in spring
+ To come and touch my hand . . . a simple thing,
+ Yet I wept for it!—this, . . . the paper’s light . . .
+ Said, Dear I love thee; and I sank and quailed
+ As if God’s future thundered on my past.
+ This said, I am thine—and so its ink has paled
+ With lying at my heart that beat too fast.
+ And this . . . O Love, thy words have ill availed
+ If, what this said, I dared repeat at last!
+
+
+
+
+XXIX
+
+
+ I think of thee!—my thoughts do twine and bud
+ About thee, as wild vines, about a tree,
+ Put out broad leaves, and soon there’s nought to see
+ Except the straggling green which hides the wood.
+ Yet, O my palm-tree, be it understood
+ I will not have my thoughts instead of thee
+ Who art dearer, better! Rather, instantly
+ Renew thy presence; as a strong tree should,
+ Rustle thy boughs and set thy trunk all bare,
+ And let these bands of greenery which insphere thee,
+ Drop heavily down,—burst, shattered everywhere!
+ Because, in this deep joy to see and hear thee
+ And breathe within thy shadow a new air,
+ I do not think of thee—I am too near thee.
+
+
+
+
+XXX
+
+
+ I see thine image through my tears to-night,
+ And yet to-day I saw thee smiling. How
+ Refer the cause?—Belovëd, is it thou
+ Or I, who makes me sad? The acolyte
+ Amid the chanted joy and thankful rite
+ May so fall flat, with pale insensate brow,
+ On the altar-stair. I hear thy voice and vow,
+ Perplexed, uncertain, since thou art out of sight,
+ As he, in his swooning ears, the choir’s amen.
+ Belovëd, dost thou love? or did I see all
+ The glory as I dreamed, and fainted when
+ Too vehement light dilated my ideal,
+ For my soul’s eyes? Will that light come again,
+ As now these tears come—falling hot and real?
+
+
+
+
+XXXI
+
+
+ Thou comest! all is said without a word.
+ I sit beneath thy looks, as children do
+ In the noon-sun, with souls that tremble through
+ Their happy eyelids from an unaverred
+ Yet prodigal inward joy. Behold, I erred
+ In that last doubt! and yet I cannot rue
+ The sin most, but the occasion—that we two
+ Should for a moment stand unministered
+ By a mutual presence. Ah, keep near and close,
+ Thou dove-like help! and when my fears would rise,
+ With thy broad heart serenely interpose:
+ Brood down with thy divine sufficiencies
+ These thoughts which tremble when bereft of those,
+ Like callow birds left desert to the skies.
+
+
+
+
+XXXII
+
+
+ The first time that the sun rose on thine oath
+ To love me, I looked forward to the moon
+ To slacken all those bonds which seemed too soon
+ And quickly tied to make a lasting troth.
+ Quick-loving hearts, I thought, may quickly loathe;
+ And, looking on myself, I seemed not one
+ For such man’s love!—more like an out-of-tune
+ Worn viol, a good singer would be wroth
+ To spoil his song with, and which, snatched in haste,
+ Is laid down at the first ill-sounding note.
+ I did not wrong myself so, but I placed
+ A wrong on thee. For perfect strains may float
+ ’Neath master-hands, from instruments defaced,—
+ And great souls, at one stroke, may do and doat.
+
+
+
+
+XXXIII
+
+
+ Yes, call me by my pet-name! let me hear
+ The name I used to run at, when a child,
+ From innocent play, and leave the cowslips plied,
+ To glance up in some face that proved me dear
+ With the look of its eyes. I miss the clear
+ Fond voices which, being drawn and reconciled
+ Into the music of Heaven’s undefiled,
+ Call me no longer. Silence on the bier,
+ While I call God—call God!—so let thy mouth
+ Be heir to those who are now exanimate.
+ Gather the north flowers to complete the south,
+ And catch the early love up in the late.
+ Yes, call me by that name,—and I, in truth,
+ With the same heart, will answer and not wait.
+
+
+
+
+XXXIV
+
+
+ With the same heart, I said, I’ll answer thee
+ As those, when thou shalt call me by my name—
+ Lo, the vain promise! is the same, the same,
+ Perplexed and ruffled by life’s strategy?
+ When called before, I told how hastily
+ I dropped my flowers or brake off from a game.
+ To run and answer with the smile that came
+ At play last moment, and went on with me
+ Through my obedience. When I answer now,
+ I drop a grave thought, break from solitude;
+ Yet still my heart goes to thee—ponder how—
+ Not as to a single good, but all my good!
+ Lay thy hand on it, best one, and allow
+ That no child’s foot could run fast as this blood.
+
+
+
+
+XXXV
+
+
+ If I leave all for thee, wilt thou exchange
+ And be all to me? Shall I never miss
+ Home-talk and blessing and the common kiss
+ That comes to each in turn, nor count it strange,
+ When I look up, to drop on a new range
+ Of walls and floors, another home than this?
+ Nay, wilt thou fill that place by me which is
+ Filled by dead eyes too tender to know change
+ That’s hardest. If to conquer love, has tried,
+ To conquer grief, tries more, as all things prove,
+ For grief indeed is love and grief beside.
+ Alas, I have grieved so I am hard to love.
+ Yet love me—wilt thou? Open thy heart wide,
+ And fold within, the wet wings of thy dove.
+
+
+
+
+XXXVI
+
+
+ When we met first and loved, I did not build
+ Upon the event with marble. Could it mean
+ To last, a love set pendulous between
+ Sorrow and sorrow? Nay, I rather thrilled,
+ Distrusting every light that seemed to gild
+ The onward path, and feared to overlean
+ A finger even. And, though I have grown serene
+ And strong since then, I think that God has willed
+ A still renewable fear . . . O love, O troth . . .
+ Lest these enclaspëd hands should never hold,
+ This mutual kiss drop down between us both
+ As an unowned thing, once the lips being cold.
+ And Love, be false! if he, to keep one oath,
+ Must lose one joy, by his life’s star foretold.
+
+
+
+
+XXXVII
+
+
+ Pardon, oh, pardon, that my soul should make
+ Of all that strong divineness which I know
+ For thine and thee, an image only so
+ Formed of the sand, and fit to shift and break.
+ It is that distant years which did not take
+ Thy sovranty, recoiling with a blow,
+ Have forced my swimming brain to undergo
+ Their doubt and dread, and blindly to forsake
+ Thy purity of likeness and distort
+ Thy worthiest love to a worthless counterfeit.
+ As if a shipwrecked Pagan, safe in port,
+ His guardian sea-god to commemorate,
+ Should set a sculptured porpoise, gills a-snort
+ And vibrant tail, within the temple-gate.
+
+
+
+
+XXXVIII
+
+
+ First time he kissed me, he but only kissed
+ The fingers of this hand wherewith I write;
+ And ever since, it grew more clean and white.
+ Slow to world-greetings, quick with its “O, list,”
+ When the angels speak. A ring of amethyst
+ I could not wear here, plainer to my sight,
+ Than that first kiss. The second passed in height
+ The first, and sought the forehead, and half missed,
+ Half falling on the hair. O beyond meed!
+ That was the chrism of love, which love’s own crown,
+ With sanctifying sweetness, did precede
+ The third upon my lips was folded down
+ In perfect, purple state; since when, indeed,
+ I have been proud and said, “My love, my own.”
+
+
+
+
+XXXIX
+
+
+ Because thou hast the power and own’st the grace
+ To look through and behind this mask of me,
+ (Against which, years have beat thus blanchingly,
+ With their rains,) and behold my soul’s true face,
+ The dim and weary witness of life’s race,—
+ Because thou hast the faith and love to see,
+ Through that same soul’s distracting lethargy,
+ The patient angel waiting for a place
+ In the new Heavens,—because nor sin nor woe,
+ Nor God’s infliction, nor death’s neighbourhood,
+ Nor all which others viewing, turn to go,
+ Nor all which makes me tired of all, self-viewed,—
+ Nothing repels thee, . . . Dearest, teach me so
+ To pour out gratitude, as thou dost, good!
+
+
+
+
+XL
+
+
+ Oh, yes! they love through all this world of ours!
+ I will not gainsay love, called love forsooth:
+ I have heard love talked in my early youth,
+ And since, not so long back but that the flowers
+ Then gathered, smell still. Mussulmans and Giaours
+ Throw kerchiefs at a smile, and have no ruth
+ For any weeping. Polypheme’s white tooth
+ Slips on the nut if, after frequent showers,
+ The shell is over-smooth,—and not so much
+ Will turn the thing called love, aside to hate
+ Or else to oblivion. But thou art not such
+ A lover, my Belovëd! thou canst wait
+ Through sorrow and sickness, to bring souls to touch,
+ And think it soon when others cry “Too late.”
+
+
+
+
+XLI
+
+
+ I thank all who have loved me in their hearts,
+ With thanks and love from mine. Deep thanks to all
+ Who paused a little near the prison-wall
+ To hear my music in its louder parts
+ Ere they went onward, each one to the mart’s
+ Or temple’s occupation, beyond call.
+ But thou, who, in my voice’s sink and fall
+ When the sob took it, thy divinest Art’s
+ Own instrument didst drop down at thy foot
+ To harken what I said between my tears, . . .
+ Instruct me how to thank thee! Oh, to shoot
+ My soul’s full meaning into future years,
+ That they should lend it utterance, and salute
+ Love that endures, from life that disappears!
+
+
+
+
+XLII
+
+
+ My future will not copy fair my past—
+ I wrote that once; and thinking at my side
+ My ministering life-angel justified
+ The word by his appealing look upcast
+ To the white throne of God, I turned at last,
+ And there, instead, saw thee, not unallied
+ To angels in thy soul! Then I, long tried
+ By natural ills, received the comfort fast,
+ While budding, at thy sight, my pilgrim’s staff
+ Gave out green leaves with morning dews impearled.
+ I seek no copy now of life’s first half:
+ Leave here the pages with long musing curled,
+ And write me new my future’s epigraph,
+ New angel mine, unhoped for in the world!
+
+
+
+
+XLIII
+
+
+ How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
+ I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
+ My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
+ For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
+ I love thee to the level of everyday’s
+ Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
+ I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
+ I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
+ I love thee with the passion put to use
+ In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
+ I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
+ With my lost saints,—I love thee with the breath,
+ Smiles, tears, of all my life!—and, if God choose,
+ I shall but love thee better after death.
+
+
+
+
+XLIV
+
+
+ Belovëd, thou hast brought me many flowers
+ Plucked in the garden, all the summer through,
+ And winter, and it seemed as if they grew
+ In this close room, nor missed the sun and showers.
+ So, in the like name of that love of ours,
+ Take back these thoughts which here unfolded too,
+ And which on warm and cold days I withdrew
+ From my heart’s ground. Indeed, those beds and bowers
+ Be overgrown with bitter weeds and rue,
+ And wait thy weeding; yet here’s eglantine,
+ Here’s ivy!—take them, as I used to do
+ Thy flowers, and keep them where they shall not pine.
+ Instruct thine eyes to keep their colours true,
+ And tell thy soul, their roots are left in mine.
+
+
+
+
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