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diff --git a/19826.txt b/19826.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..23abf5a --- /dev/null +++ b/19826.txt @@ -0,0 +1,8339 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of The White Christmas and other Merry +Christmas Plays, by Walter Ben Hare + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The White Christmas and other Merry Christmas Plays + +Author: Walter Ben Hare + +Illustrator: Buckton Nendick + +Release Date: November 16, 2006 [EBook #19826] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE WHITE CHRISTMAS *** + + + + +Produced by Suzanne Shell, Linda Cantoni, and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + + + + + + + + +THE WHITE CHRISTMAS + +AND OTHER + +MERRY CHRISTMAS PLAYS + +BY + +WALTER BEN HARE + +AUTHOR OF THE PLAYS + +"_Aaron Boggs, Freshman_," "_Abbu San of Old Japan_," "_Civil +Service_," "_A College Town_," "_Kicked Out of College_," "_Macbeth a +la Mode_," "_Mrs. Tubbs of Shantytown_," "_Parlor Matches_," "_A Poor +Married Man_," "_My Irish Rose_," "_A Rustic Romeo_," "_Savageland_," +"_A Southern Cinderella_," etc. + +ILLUSTRATED BY + +BUCKTON NENDICK + +CHICAGO +T.S. DENISON & COMPANY +PUBLISHERS + +COPYRIGHT, 1917 +BY +EBEN H. NORRIS + +MADE IN U.S.A. + +[Illustration: From "ANITA'S SECRET OR CHRISTMAS IN THE STEERAGE"] + + + + +THIS BOOK IS DEDICATED + +WITH THE BEST WISHES OF THE AUTHOR + +TO + +FRANCES MAAS ULLMANN + +THE ORIGINAL + +"ANITA" + +AND + +LUDWIG BLOCK ULLMANN + +THE ORIGINAL + +"JOLLY JACK FROST" + + * * * * * + + "I have always thought of Christmas time ... as a good time; + a kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time; the only time + ... when men and women seem by one consent to open their + shut-up hearts freely ...; and I say, God bless it!" + + CHARLES DICKENS. + + + + +FOREWORD + + +In these little plays I have tried to bring before the public the two +dominant characteristics of the ideal Christmas season, kindness, +expressed by "good will toward men," and the inward joy wrought by +kind acts, and suggested by "peace on earth." As Yuletide draws near +we like to think of the swell of Christmas feeling, kindness, peace +and good will, that rises like a mighty tide over the world, filling +it with the fresh, clean joys and generous impulses that produce the +peace that passeth understanding. + +Some of the plays are filled with the spirit of fun and jollity that +is always associated with Christmas merrymaking; in others I have +tried to emphasize the spiritual blessings brought to the children of +men on that first white Christmas night when Christ, the Lord, was +born in Bethlehem, and all the angels sang, "Gloria in excelsis, peace +on earth, good will toward men." + + +CHILDREN IN PLAYS. + +The love of mimetic representation, either as a participant or as a +spectator, is an ineradicable instinct of childhood and adolescence. +Most of these plays call for a somewhat large number of children. This +need not daunt the producer as the chief characters are few and many +of the parts have very few lines to speak. Many extra children may be +introduced in several of the plays, as a chorus. At Christmas time, +the children's season, it is best to allow all who so desire to take +part in the entertainment. Some of the parts are rather long, but all +have been played by children of the age indicated in the text. Very +little children have sometimes done remarkable work in the plays. I +remember one instance when a very tiny Tiny Tim, who was not four +years old, spoke his part correctly, was heard in every corner of the +church and acted with a naturalness that was indeed remarkable. + + +REHEARSALS. + +First and foremost, do _not_ over-rehearse your play. The chief charm +in Christmas plays lies in their naturalness and simplicity, a part of +which is almost sure to be lost if they have rehearsed the play until +they have lost their wonder and excitement and enjoyment in the +make-believe game of amateur theatricals. + +The director's aim should be to establish a happy co-operation with +the players that will make the whole production, rehearsals, dress +rehearsals and final performance, a series of good times crowned by a +happy, if not perfect, production. The director should always strive +to be cheerful and happy, ever ready to give advice and ever ready to +ask for advice, even from the youngest players. Take them into your +confidence. Discuss color schemes, costuming, property making, +lighting and scenic effects with your actors. + +At the first rehearsal have the children listen to a reading of the +play. Then read a short scene in detail, allowing each actor to read +several parts. Try every child in every child's part before you make +your final selection of the cast of characters. If it is possible, +begin your second rehearsal on the stage where the play is to be +given. Arrange chairs to represent entrances, doors, windows, etc., +and have all properties on hand, in order to impress on the children's +minds the necessity of learning the words and the action at the same +time. At the third rehearsal the play should be given in its entirety, +music, gestures, entrances, exits, groupings and crossing from one +side of the stage to another at a given cue, etc. In fact, everything +as in the completed production, except that the actors may use their +copies of the play for reading the lines. + + +DELAYS. + +The director should make every effort to guard against stage waits and +delays of every sort. Have your stage hands, prompter, property +managers, scene painters and all your assistants on hand at every +rehearsal, if possible. Long waits between the acts, tardiness in +beginning the performance, and all delays do much to destroy an +otherwise happy impression. Every piece of scenery, every costume, +every bit of make-up and every property should be in its place--all +ready to make a smooth final performance. Dress rehearsals are +absolutely necessary. The last two rehearsals should be complete +performances of the play with lights, curtains, costumes, make-up, +scenery and all incidentals exactly as they are to be on the night of +the performance. + +With such preparation, scarcely anything is impossible of attainment. +The pleasure of the work and the pride in a production well done will +amply repay an ungrudging lavishment of time and labor. + +WALTER BEN HARE. + +_Drury College_, + _Springfield, Mo._ + + * * * * * + +STAGE DIRECTIONS. + +Stage directions are purposely simplified and few abbreviations used. +_R._ means right of the stage: _C._, center; _L._, left, etc. The +actor is supposed to be facing the audience. + + +MUSIC. + +Music is provided for a few of the songs in this book. The others are +to be sung to old airs that are presumably familiar to everyone. If +any of them should prove unfamiliar, the music of all except some of +the hymns will be found in Denison's "_Songs Worth While_," one of the +best arranged and most carefully edited collections of old favorites +ever published. This book is beautifully printed on non-glossy paper, +measuring 7 by 10-1/4 inches, and is well bound in a stout paper cover +done in colors. It may be obtained from the publishers for the price +of $1.00, postpaid. + +For all the hymns not included in "_Songs Worth While_," see any +standard church hymnal. + + + + +CONTENTS + + +The White Christmas (8 Male, 7 Female Adults) 13 + +Anita's Secret or Christmas in the Steerage +(1 Male Adult, 9 Boys, 7 Girls) 49 + +Christmas With the Mulligan's (2 Female Adults, +5 Boys, 5 Girls) 93 + +The Wishing Man (4 Male Adults, 13 Boys, +7 Girls) 131 + +A Christmas Carol or the Miser's Yuletide +Dream (10 Male, 5 Female Adults, 4 Boys, +4 Girls) 167 + +Her Christmas Hat (4 Male, 5 Female Adults) 203 + + + + +THE WHITE CHRISTMAS + +[Illustration: + +JOSEPH MARY SIMEON + +TIMOTHY ISAAC ANNA THOMAS + +RUTH RACHEL DEBORAH PRISCILLA + +MELCHOIR GASPAR BALTASAR PROLOGUE] + + + + +THE WHITE CHRISTMAS + +A CHRISTMAS MORALITY PLAY IN ONE ACT. + +_Originally produced by the Quadrangle Club of the University of +Missouri, Christmas Eve, 1909._ + + +CHARACTERS. + +MARY _The Maiden Mother_ +JOSEPH _Of the House of David_ +SIMEON _An Old Shepherd_ +TIMOTHY _A Shepherd, the Husband of Anna_ +ISAAC _A Young Shepherd_ +ANNA _The Wife of Timothy, the Shepherd_ +THOMAS _Her Little Son_ +RUTH _Her Little Daughter_ +DEBORAH _Hostess of an Inn at Bethlehem_ +RACHEL _A Maiden of Bethlehem_ +PRISCILLA _Her Cousin_ +MELCHOIR } +GASPAR } _The Wise Men from the East._ +BALTASAR } + +_A Concealed Choir. The Prologue._ + +_For description of costumes, arrangement of the scene, etc., see +"Remarks on the Production" at the end of the play._ + +TIME OF PLAYING--_About One Hour._ + + * * * * * + +SCENE I: _Before the play begins the_ PROLOGUE _steps in front of the +curtains and addresses the congregation._ + +PROLOGUE. + + The earth has grown old with its burden of care, + But at Christmas it always is young, + The heart of the jewel burns lustrous and fair, + And its soul, full of music, bursts forth on the air, + When the song of the angels is sung. + + It is coming, Old Earth, it is coming tonight! + On the snowflakes which cover thy sod + The feet of the Christ Child fall gentle and white, + And the voice of the Christ Child tells out with delight, + That mankind are the children of God. + + On the sad and the lonely, the wretched and poor, + The voice of the Christ Child shall fall; + And to every blind wanderer open the door + Of hope that he dared not to dream of before, + With a sunshine of welcome for all. + + --_Phillips Brooks._ + +And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from +Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed. And this taxing +was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria. And all went to be +taxed, every one into his own city. + +And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, +into Judea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem, because +he was of the house and lineage of David. To be taxed with Mary his +espoused wife.... + +And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished +that she should be delivered. And she brought forth her first born +son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; +because there was no room for them in the inn. + +(_Exit_ PROLOGUE.) + +(_Soft chimes. As these chimes die away in the distance a concealed +choir is heard singing._) + + O COME, COME, AWAY. + + O come, come away + From labor now reposing, + Let busy care a while forbear; + O come, come away. + +(_The front curtains are drawn, showing a winter street in Bethlehem. +No one appears on the stage, but the choir continues singing outside +at right front._) + + Come, come, our social joys renew, + And thus where trust and friendship grew, + Let true hearts welcome you, + O come, come away. + +RACHEL _and_ PRISCILLA _enter from the inn at right front, arm in arm. +They go to the center, then to the rear of the stage, turn and face +the inn, pause a moment or two, listening to the choir, and then go +out at rear left. The choir continues:_ + + From toils and the cares + On which the day is closing, + The hour of eve brings sweet reprieve, + O come, come away. + O come where love will smile on thee, + And round its hearth will gladness be, + And time fly merrily, + O come, come away. + +_While the choir is singing the last three lines of the song_, SIMEON +_and_ ISAAC _enter from rear left, leaning on their shepherd's crooks. +They pause at rear center and listen to the singing. When the song is +finished the organ continues the same music softly._ + +SIMEON. + Make haste, my son, the hour is waxing late, + The night is cold, methinks our sheep await. + +ISAAC. + Nay gran'ther, I would liefer tarry here. + The town is gay, the inns are full of cheer. + +SIMEON (_points to rear right_). + But there our duty lies, the wind grows cold! + Come, let's away and put the sheep in fold. + +(_Starts off right._) + +ISAAC. + Nay, Simeon, wait! What means this crowd of men + And women here in peaceful Bethlehem? + +SIMEON (_comes to him_). + Herod the King hath issued a decree + That each and all his subjects taxed be; + And every one who in this town saw light + Must here return and register tonight. + From all Judea, aye, from th' distant land, + Each Bethlehemite must come at his command. + +ISAAC (_comes to the doorway of the inn and peers in_). + The town is full of people, great and small, + Each inn is crowded to its very wall. + +SIMEON (_comes down center and takes his arm_). + But come, we're wasting time, 'tis very late. + Make haste, my son, I know the flocks await! + +ISAAC. + Thou speakest true, though I would rather stay, + Our duty calls, so to the hills, away! + +(_They go out at rear right._) + +_The concealed choir repeats the first stanza of the song softly. +After a slight pause_ DEBORAH _enters from the inn._ + +DEBORAH (_coming down to right front_). + My inn is crowded to the doors. The heat + Is stifling, but out here the air is sweet. + +(_Looks upward._) + + The bright stars twinkle with mysterious light, + Methinks there's something strange about the night. + +_She sits on the bench in front of the inn._ TIMOTHY _enters from rear +left._ DEBORAH _continues her soliloquy._ + + The air is still, the night is very cold, + The shepherds seek the hills to watch the fold. + +(_Sees him._) + +(TIMOTHY _goes out at rear R._) + +DEBORAH. + Some strange, unearthly voice seems calling me, + Methinks this night portends great things to be. + +_Enter_ RACHEL _and_ PRISCILLA _from rear right, then come down center +and address the hostess._ + +RACHEL. + Hail, hostess of the inn, my cousin here + Hath lodgings at your inn. We'd seek its cheer. + +DEBORAH (_rises_). + Enter within. My guests tonight are gay + And fain would turn this winter's night to day. + +RACHEL _and_ PRISCILLA _enter the inn, followed by_ DEBORAH. _The +organ music continues softly. After a slight pause enter_ ANNA _from +rear left. She leads_ RUTH _and_ THOMAS _by the hand._ + +THOMAS (_at rear center_). + Oh, mother, hark! There's music in the inn! + +ANNA. + 'Tis not for us--their noise and merry din. + +RUTH. + Our little town is crowded, joyous, gay. + +THOMAS. + So many travelers came this way today. + +RUTH. + The night is chill and cold, I much do fear + The little sheep will shiver by the mere. + +ANNA. + Too cold it is for thee, I fear, in truth, + Return and get thy cloak, my little Ruth. + We'll wait for thee upon the little hill. + +(_Points off R._) + + But speed thy steps, the cold will work thee ill. + +RUTH. + I'll fly, dear mother, like an arrow home. + +(_Runs out at L._) + +ANNA. + We must not tarry. Come, my Thomas, come! + +(_She leads him out at rear R. There is a pause. The music changes to +a mysterious plaintive air. The old German song, Holy Night, may be +effectively introduced as an organ solo._) + +_Enter from rear right,_ JOSEPH, _walking with a staff and supporting_ +MARY. + +MARY. + Here is a place, now I must rest awhile! + For many a league, for many a weary mile, + We've trudged along since break of day began. + +JOSEPH. + 'Tis true, and I'm an old and ancient man, + My joints are stiff, my bones are waxing old-- + And the long night is bitter, bitter cold. + Here take my cloak and keep thee warm within, + And wait thee here while I search out an inn. + +(_He wraps his cloak around her and seats her on the bench or stool in +front of the manger. He goes out at rear left. The music changes to +the Magnificat, to be found in all Episcopal hymnals._) + +MARY (_sings_). + My soul doth magnify the Lord: and my spirit hath rejoiced in God + my Saviour. + For he hath regarded: the lowliness of his handmaiden. + For behold, from henceforth: all generations shall call me blessed. + For he that is mighty has magnified me: and holy is his Name. + And his mercy is on them that fear him: throughout all generations. + He hath showed strength with his arm: he hath scattered the proud + in the imagination of their hearts. + He hath put down the mighty from their seat: and hath exalted the + humble and meek. + He hath filled the hungry with good things: and the rich he hath + sent empty away. + He remembering his mercy hath holpen his servant Israel: as he + promised to our forefathers, Abraham and his seed, forever. + +_Enter_ JOSEPH _from rear L._ + +JOSEPH. + For hours I've trudged the street in fruitless quest, + Here is an inn, mayhap at last we'll rest. + +_Enter_ DEBORAH _from the inn._ + +MARY. + Husband, I'm faint; I can no farther go. + Methinks I'll rest me here upon this loe. + +(_Sits in front of the manger._) + +JOSEPH (_assisting her_). + Have courage, Mary, here's the hostess here. + +(_Comes to_ DEBORAH _at right._) + + We'd lodge with thee tonight. + +DEBORAH. + Alas, I fear + My inn is crowded to the very wall, + Soldiers and scribes, the rich, the great, the small! + +JOSEPH. + Is there room for us? My wife is ill. + +DEBORAH. + My heart is sad and it is not my will + To send you hence, but naught is left to do. + Perhaps some other inn will shelter you. + +JOSEPH. + Alas, the other inns are all the same! + +DEBORAH. + Never was seen the like in Bethlehem. + +(_Laughter and noise at R._) + + My guests are merry, hear their jovial din! + +(_Goes to R._) + + I pity you, there's no room at the inn. + +(_Exits into the inn._) + +MARY. + Our last hope gone! Now, what shall we do? + My strength is leaving! + +(_Bows head._) + +JOSEPH. + Would I could succor you. + I'll wrap thee warm. Now rest thee here a while. + We've traveled far, full many a weary mile. + +_Enter_ RUTH _from rear L., hurrying along._ + +JOSEPH. + Maiden, I fain would stop thee in thy flight-- + Can'st tell where we could lodge this winter night? + +RUTH. + That inn is crowded. There's one upon the hill. + +JOSEPH. + I've tried them all, my wife is very ill. + +RUTH. + That little stable there upon the loe, + +(_Points to L front._) + + 'Tis snug and warm. 'Twill shield thee from the snow. + +MARY (_rises_). + God's blessing on thy little head, sweet child! + Come, Joseph, for the wind now waxes wild. + +(_Exits L. front._) + +(JOSEPH _leads her to exit L., then turns and looks off R._) + +JOSEPH. + + O little town of Bethlehem, + How still we see thee lie! + Above thy deep and dreamless sleep + The silent stars go by. + Yet in thy dark streets shineth + +(_Turns toward manger._) + + The everlasting Light; + The hopes and fears of all the years + Are met in thee tonight. + +(RUTH _stands at rear C., watching him._) + +_The curtains slowly fall._ + + +Scene II: _Hymn by the congregation._ + + WHILE SHEPHERDS WATCHED THEIR FLOCKS. + + While shepherds watched their flocks by night, + All seated on the ground. + The angel of the Lord came down, + And glory shone around, + And glory shone around. + + "Fear not," said he,--for mighty dread + Had seized their troubled mind, + "Glad tidings of great joy I bring, + To you and all mankind, + To you and all mankind." + + "To you in David's town this day, + Is born of David's line, + The Saviour, who is Christ, the Lord, + And this shall be the sign, + And this shall be the sign." + + "The heav'nly babe you there shall find + To human view displayed, + All meanly wrapped in swathing bands, + And in a manger laid, + And in a manger laid." + + Thus spake the seraph--and forthwith + Appeared a shining throng + Of angels, praising God, who thus + Addressed their joyful song, + Addressed their joyful song:-- + + "All glory be to God on high, + And to the earth be peace; + Good will henceforth, from heav'n to men, + Begin and never cease, + Begin and never cease." + +_The_ PROLOGUE _appears before the curtains and speaks._ + +PROLOGUE. + + There's scarlet holly on the streets, and silver mistletoe; + The surging, jeweled, ragged crowds forever come and go. + And here a silken woman laughs, and there a beggar asks-- + And, oh, the faces, tense of lip, like mad and mocking masks. + Who thinks of Bethlehem today, and one lone winter night? + Who knows that in a manger-bed there breathed a Child of Light? + + There's fragrant scent of evergreen upon the chilling air; + There's tinsel tawdriness revealed beneath the sunlight's glare; + There's Want and Plenty, Greed and Pride--a hundred thousand souls, + And, oh, the weary eyes of them, like dull and sullen coals. + Who knows the town of Bethlehem, once gleamed beneath the star, + Whose wondrous light the shepherds saw watching their flocks afar? + + And yet above the city streets, above the noise and whir, + There seems to come a fragrant breath of frankincense and myrrh. + I saw a woman, bent and wan, and on her face a light + The look that Mary might have worn that other Christmas night. + And as the little children passed, and one lad turned and smiled, + I saw within his wistful eyes the spirit of the Child. + + --_Caroline Reynolds._ + +And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, +keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the +Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them; +and they were sore afraid. + +And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good +tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is +born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the +Lord. + +And this shall be a sign unto you: Ye shall find the babe wrapped in +swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. + +And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host +praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth +peace, good will toward men. + +And it came to pass, as the angels were gone away from them into +heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us now go even unto +Bethlehem, and see this thing which is come to pass, which the Lord +hath made known to us. + +And they came with haste, and found Mary and Joseph, and the babe +lying in a manger. (_Exit_ PROLOGUE _at L._) + +(_Soft chimes are heard. The_ SHEPHERDS, _accompanied by the concealed +choir, are heard singing:_) + + LEAD, KINDLY LIGHT + + Lead, kindly Light, amid th' encircling gloom, + Lead Thou me on! + The night is dark and I am far from home; + Lead Thou me on! + Keep Thou my feet, I do not ask to see + The distant scene; one step enough for me. + +_As the_ SHEPHERDS _begin on the second stanza of the hymn, the +curtains rise disclosing the same scene as before._ SIMEON, TIMOTHY +_and_ ISAAC _discovered seated in a group at rear center, singing._ +THOMAS _stands by his father._ + + So long Thy pow'r hath blest me, sure it still + Will lead me on + O'er moor and fen, o'er crag and torrent, till + The night is gone, + And with the morn those angel faces smile + Which I have loved long since, and lost a-while. + +SIMEON. + Methought I heard a whir of wings on high. + +TIMOTHY. + I see naught save the snow and starry sky. + +ISAAC. + We've come a long and mighty step today, + From o'er the frosty hills and far away. + +THOMAS (_pointing over the manger_). + Look, father, dost thou see that shining star + That seems to stand above the town so far? + 'Tis like a wondrous blossom on a stem, + And see, it ever shines o'er Bethlehem! + +TIMOTHY. + A brighter star, I'm sure I never saw-- + And perfect form, without a speck or flaw. + +SIMEON. + A stranger star! It never shone before, + It standeth still above that stable door. + +_Enter_ ANNA _and_ RUTH _from rear left._ ANNA _carries a little +lamb._ + +ANNA (_joining the group_). + Look ye, I've found a little lamb new-born. + +TIMOTHY. + Poor little beastie! Wrap him well and warm. + +SIMEON. + An ill night to be born in, frost and snow, + Naught but cold skies above, cold earth below. + I marvel any little creature should be born + On such a night. + +ANNA. + I found it all forlorn, + Crying beside its mother in the storm. + +SIMEON (_comes down a little to right front_). + Hark, I thought I heard a sound of mighty wings! + Listen! Is it the winter sky that sings? + +ISAAC (_with the group at rear center_). + Nay, gran'ther, I heard naught. You're old and gray + And weary with the miles you've walked today. + +SIMEON. + At noon I met a man who tarried in the shade, + He led a mule, and riding it a maid-- + A maiden with a face I'll ne'er forget, + A wondrous face, I seem to see it yet + Lit with an inward shining, as if God + Had set a lighted lamp within her soul. + Many have passed all day, but none like these, + And no face have I ever seen like hers. + +TIMOTHY. + Belike the man and maid were strangers here, + And come to Bethlehem at the king's command. + +RUTH (_comes down to_ SIMEON _and takes his hand_). + Methinks I met that very man and maid-- + A maiden with such wondrous dove-like eyes, + I saw them near this place, all tired and worn, + Trudging about the town, seeking an inn. + +SIMEON. + And did they find one? + +RUTH. + Nay, not so! + For every inn was crowded to its doors. + Hard by Deborah's inn there is a little barn, + All full of cattle, oxen, cooing doves-- + I showed it to them, and they went therein. + +THOMAS (_standing at rear L. with_ ANNA). + Mother, that star! That wondrous, wondrous light, + +(_Points up._) + + It turns the night to day, it shines so bright + I am afraid! It cannot be that any star, + Only a star, can give so great a light. + It frightens me. + +ANNA. + All things are strange tonight. + The very sheep are restless in their fold, + They watch the star and do not mind the cold. + +SIMEON (_puts hand to right ear, bends toward right and listens_). + Again I heard a singing in the sky! + +TIMOTHY. + You heard the tinkling bell of some stray sheep, + The night grows late, come let us all to sleep. + +SIMEON. + Yea, all ye lie down and take your rest, + I'll keep the watch alone, this night is blest. + +(_The others recline at the rear._) + +ANNA (_comes to_ SIMEON). + Here, take the little sheep and keep it warm. + +(_Lies down._) + +SIMEON. + Poor little new-born beast, I'll guard from harm. + Again I marvel that you should be born + On such a night, poor little lamb forlorn. + +(SIMEON _walks toward the manger with the sheep in his arms. The +others sleep._) + +The Lord is my shepherd: I shall not want. + +He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the +still waters. + +He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for +his name's sake. + +Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will +fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort +me. + +Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou +anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. + +Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and +I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever. + +(_Soft Music._) + + Hark! There's music in the wind! And that strange light + There in the east, it brightens all the night! + I seem to hear again the whir of wings, + Awake, awake! It is an angel sings! + +(_He arouses the others. They listen wonderingly, standing or +reclining._) + +VOICE (_an unseen soprano chants softly_). + + Glory to God in the highest! + Fear not! + For behold I bring you glad tidings + Of great joy. + For unto you is born this day + In the city of David, a Saviour + Which is Christ, the Lord. + And this shall be the sign unto you: + Ye shall find the heavenly Babe + Wrapped in swaddling clothes, + Lying in a manger. + Glory to God in the highest, + And on earth peace, + Good will toward men! + +TIMOTHY. + 'Twas a fine voice, even as ever I heard. + +ANNA. + The hills, as with lightning, shone at his word. + +SIMEON. + He spoke of a Babe here in Bethlehem. + That betokens yon star! + Full glad would I be, + Might I kneel on my knee, + Some word to say to that Child. + +TIMOTHY. + See! In the east there breaks the day. + +ANNA. + Let us tarry no longer; away, then, away! + +(ANNA _goes out at rear, behind the stable, with_ TIMOTHY, RUTH _and_ +THOMAS.) + +ISAAC. + Come, gran'ther, let us go and see this thing! + +SIMEON. + But first get gifts to take the new-born King! + Glory to God in the highest, + And on earth peace, + Good will toward men. + +(_They follow the others out at rear._) + +_The curtains fall._ + + +SCENE III: _Hymn by the congregation:_ + + HARK! THE HERALD ANGELS SING. + + Hark! The herald angels sing, + "Glory to the new-born King! + Peace on earth, and mercy mild, + God and sinners reconciled." + Joyful, all ye nations, rise, + Join the triumph of the skies; + With th' angelic host proclaim, + "Christ is born in Bethlehem." + + Christ, by highest Heaven adored; + Christ, the everlasting Lord; + Late in time behold Him come, + Offspring of the favored one. + Veiled in flesh, the Godhead see; + Hail th' incarnate Deity: + Pleased, as man with men to dwell, + Jesus, our Immanuel. + + Hail! The Heav'n-born Prince of Peace! + Hail! The Son of Righteousness! + Light and life to all He brings, + Risen with healing in His wings. + Mild He lays His glory by, + Born that man no more may die: + Born to raise the sons of earth, + Born to give them second birth. + +_Enter_ PROLOGUE _before the closed curtains._ + +PROLOGUE. + +Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the +king, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem, saying, +Where is he that is born King of the Jews? For we have seen his star +in the east, and are come to worship him. + +When Herod the king had heard these things, he was troubled, and all +Jerusalem with him. And when he had gathered all the chief priests and +scribes of the people together, he demanded of them where Christ +should be born. + +And they said unto him, In Bethlehem of Judea: for thus it is written +by the prophet, And thou Bethlehem, in the land of Juda, art not the +least among the princes of Juda: for out of thee shall come a +Governor, that shall rule my people Israel. + +Then Herod, when he had privily called the wise men, inquired of them +diligently what time the star appeared. + +And he sent them to Bethlehem, and said, Go and search diligently for +the young child; and when ye have found him, bring me word again, that +I may come and worship him also. + +When they had heard the king, they departed; and, lo, the star, which +they saw in the east, went before them, till it came and stood over +where the young child was. + +When they saw the star, they rejoiced with exceeding great joy. + +And when they were come into the house, they saw the young child with +Mary his mother, and fell down, and worshipped him: and when they had +opened their treasures, they presented unto him gifts; gold, and +frankincense, and myrrh. + +_The White Christmas._ + +As the three wise men rode on that first Christmas night to find the +manger-cradled Babe of Bethlehem, they bore gifts on their +saddle-bows. Gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh. And so the spirit +of Christmas giving crept into the world's heart. We bring our gifts +to the children. Rich children, poor children! The children of the +high and the children of the humble! Poor little sick children--and +the ragged children of the slums of our cities. Let us remember them +all. + +So go ye, all of ye, into the highways and byways, and seek out the +poor and the distressed, the humble and the afflicted, seek out the +ragged children and the outcasts and the aged ones, and in the name of +Him who was born on Christmas day, carry some sunshine into their +hearts! Give unto the poor and the afflicted, and your hearts shall +glow with that inward peace that passeth all understanding. + +Then--and then only--will you be able to sing with all the company of +Heaven, Glory to God in the highest, peace on earth, good will toward +men! And this will be your pure white Christmas. (_Exit_ PROLOGUE _at +L._) + +_Soft chimes are heard. The curtains are drawn, disclosing the same +scene as before._ DEBORAH _sits before her inn, deep in thought._ + +DEBORAH (_reading a scroll_). + +This is the ancient prophecy. Therefore the Lord himself shall give +you a sign; behold, a virgin shall conceive, and bear a son, and shall +call his name Immanuel. + +Butter and honey shall he eat, that he may know to refuse the evil and +choose the good. + +For before the child shall know to refuse the evil, and choose the +good, the land that thou abhorrest shall be forsaken of both her +kings. + +_Enter_ GASPAR _from behind the inn. He comes down center._ + +GASPAR. + I pray thee, tell me, Lady Bethlehemite, + If any wonders you have seen this night? + +DEBORAH (_rises_). + I've seen a wondrous silver shaft of light + Come from a star, and blinded is my sight. + +GASPAR. + Tell me, for thou art native of this place, + What dost thou know about the King of Grace-- + King of the Jews? + +DEBORAH. + Aye, in Jerusalem + He dwells, and not in Bethlehem. + He sits upon his mighty judgment throne, + Cruel and stern, his heart a living stone. + +GASPAR. + I mean a new-born King, of love and peace; + His is the star--His reign shall never cease. + +DEBORAH. + All things tonight seem passing strange to me, + I have just read an ancient prophecy + That this, our Bethlehem, King David's town, + Shall be the birthplace, e'er of great renown, + Of one called Councillor of King David's line + Whose coming is foretold in words divine. + And now you come with words of mystery! + +(_Muses._) + + Why should thy questions, which are dark to me, + Cause me to think of Him? + +GASPAR. + The star! The star! + No more it moves about the heavens afar, + It standeth still. O, hostess, kneel and pray, + For Jesus Christ, the Lord, is born today! + +(_Hurries out right._) + +DEBORAH. + His words are fraught with mystery; I'll within + And seek protection in my humble inn. + +(_Exits right front._) + +_After a short pause_, MELCHOIR, GASPAR _and_ BALTASAR _enter from +rear right._ + +MELCHOIR. + + Three kings came riding from far away, + Melchoir, Gaspar and Baltasar; + Three wise men out of the east were they, + And they traveled by night and they slept by day, + For their guide was a beautiful, wonderful star. + +BALTASAR. + + The star was so beautiful, large and clear, + That all other stars of the sky + Became a white mist in the atmosphere; + And by this they knew that the coming was near + Of the Prince foretold in prophecy. + +GASPAR. + + Of the child that is born, O Baltasar, + I begged a woman to tell us the news; + I said in the east we had seen His star, + And had ridden fast and had ridden far + To find and worship the King of the Jews. + + --_Adapted from Longfellow._ + +MELCHOIR. + Brothers, our quest is ended; see the star + Is standing still over this lowly hut. + +BALTASAR. + Methinks it is a stable. Knock and see! + +GASPAR (_knocks on the door of the manger_). + What ho, within! + +JOSEPH _enters from the L. rear._ + +JOSEPH. + Sirs, whom seek ye? + +MELCHOIR. + We have journeyed from afar + Led by the shining of yon splendid star. + We are Gaspar, Melchoir and Baltasar. + +BALTASAR. + We seek a new-born King, + Gold, frankincense to him we bring. + And many a kingly offering. + +JOSEPH _draws back the curtain and reveals the interior of the +manger._ MARY _is seen bending over the crib. The_ SHEPHERDS _are +kneeling in the background. Very soft music heard in the distance, +with faintly chiming bells at intervals._ + +GASPAR. + Behold, the child is clothed in light! + +MELCHOIR. + Our journey ends, passed is the night. + +BALTASAR. + Now let us make no more delay, + But worship Him right worthily. + +(_They enter the manger and kneel._) + +SIMEON. + Hail, hail, dear child + Of a maiden meek and mild. + See, he merries! + See, he smiles, my sweeting, + I give thee greeting! + Have a bob of cherries. + +(_Places a spray of cherries on the crib._) + +TIMOTHY. + Hail, little One we've sought, + See, a bird I've brought, + See its feathers gay. + Hail, little One adored, + Hail, blessed King and Lord, + Star of the day! + +(_Places a bird on the crib._) + +ISAAC. + Hail, little One, so dear, + My heart is full of cheer, + A little ball I bring, + Reach forth thy fingers gay, + And take the ball and play, + My blessed King. + +(_Places a ball on the crib._) + +_Enter all others from the Inn. They kneel outside the manger._ + +ALL (_sing, with concealed choir_). + + CHRISTMAS CAROL. + + (_See page 169_) + + Christ was born on Christmas day, + Wreathe the holly, twine the bay, + Light and life and joy is He-- + The Babe, the Son, + The Holy One + Of Mary. + + He is born to set us free; + He is born our Lord to be; + Carol, Christians, joyfully; + The God, the Lord, + By all adored + Forever. + + Let the bright red berries glow, + Everywhere in goodly show, + Life and light and joy is He, + The Babe, the Son, + The Holy One + Of Mary. + + Christian men, rejoice and sing; + 'Tis the birthday of our King, + Carol, Christians, joyfully; + The God, the Lord, + By all adored + Forever. + +THE THREE KINGS. + Hail, King of Kings! + +GASPAR. + I bring Thee a crown, O King of Kings, + And here a scepter full of gems, + For Thou shalt rule the hearts of men. + +(_Places crown and scepter on crib._) + +MELCHOIR. + For Thee I bring sweet frankincense! + +(_He swings a smoking censor._) + +BALTASAR. + And I bring myrrh to offer Thee! + +(_Places casket on the crib._) + +GASPAR. + The greatest gift is yet ungiven, + The gift that cometh straight from Heaven. + O, Heavenly King, + Heart's love we bring. + +MELCHOIR. + Not gold nor gems from land or sea + Is worth the love we offer Thee. + +BALTASAR. + And lowly folk who have no gold, + Nor gift to offer that is meet, + May bring the dearest thing of all-- + A loving heart and service sweet. + +(_All join in singing "Joy to the World."_) + +_Curtain falls._ + + +THE WHITE CHRISTMAS. + +WHAT IT MEANS. + +How to make a pleasant, _helpful_ Christmas for the Sunday School is +an annual problem. A tree with gifts, Santa Claus coming down the +chimney, a treat of candy and nuts--these and many other schemes have +been tried with a greater or less degree of success. But the criticism +is often made that the true significance of the celebration of the +birth of Christ is lost in the mere idea of bartering Christmas +presents. "She didn't give me anything last year, so I'm not going to +give her anything this year." + +One wise superintendent determined to teach his Sunday School pupils +the precious lesson of the beauty of giving. He called his teachers +together a few weeks before Christmas and proposed to eliminate +entirely the idea of "getting something," and in its stead to try to +teach something of the true spirit of Christmas, the blessedness of +giving. + +The children were told that while at home they would receive all the +usual presents, of course they would not get anything whatever from +the Sunday School. The story of Jesus and how He gave His life, and +how He liked best the gifts that cost us something, love, thought, +foresight, charity, money--was told to the children and they were +asked to save their pennies, instead of spending them for candy and +nuts, to brighten the Christmas Day for God's poor and unfortunate. + +It was put to a vote and every little hand was raised, although it may +be confessed that a few went up a little reluctantly. + +Teachers and young ladies met a few evenings later and made little +stockings out of cheap cambric, with a cord put into the top of each +in such a manner that it could be drawn together so the pennies would +not be lost out. The stockings were about five inches long, and of +various bright colors, and there were enough for every child. These +were given out two weeks before Christmas. + +On Christmas Eve, near the close of the regular program, a large tree +was disclosed, but without a single present on it. The Minister made a +short talk on the joys of giving to the poor and the children marched +up, singing a Christmas carol, and attached their little stocking-bags +to the tree. + +Six little boys and girls passed among the congregation with larger +stockings, collecting donations for the tree. These stockings had +their tops neatly sewed around little circles of wire to keep them +open. + +The program consisted of Christmas hymns and carols, interspersed with +recitations--all breathing the spirit of the White Christmas. + + +REMARKS ON THE PRODUCTION. + +SCENERY. + +Hang the rear and the sides of the stage with dark blue curtains, +spangled with small silver bits of tinfoil, to represent very tiny +stars. If the blue curtains are not available, use white sheets. + +Cover the floor with white sheets. Have two or three small evergreen +trees at rear, covered with white calcimine and diamond powder. Soak +long rags, shaped like icicles, in a strong solution of alum, and then +let them crystallize, then attach them to the trees. + +[Illustration] + +Down right, near the audience, is a doorway, supposed to be the +entrance to the inn. This may be simply an opening between two wooden +columns, with a step or two leading in. A lantern hangs over the door. +A small bench stands by the inn. + +Down left, near the audience, is the manger, a building extending out +from left about seven feet. It has a back and one side of scenery or +dark draperies and a thatched roof, covered with twigs or evergreen +branches. There may be a door leading into the manger from the stage, +but this is not necessary, as the characters can go out behind the +manger. A front curtain, of dark goods, conceals the interior of the +manger from the audience until it is withdrawn by Joseph. + +The interior of the manger is covered with hay. Rude boxes and farm +implements all around. A large upturned chair with wooden legs may +simulate the crib, if it is concealed by enough straw. An electric +light bulb is concealed in this straw and shines on the face of Mary, +bending over the crib. + +If desired, the manger scene may be presented in the choir loft, the +manger hidden by curtains until revealed by Joseph. In this case have +the evergreen trees at the left of the stage and arrange the manger +scene at the rear and elevated above the other scene. This will prove +most feasible in churches where the choir loft is immediately behind +and above the platform. + + +LIGHTS. + +Dim all the lights in the audience. Have a powerful searchlight, +engine headlight or two powerful auto lights shining on the stage from +a concealed elevation at the left. Shade these lights with a blue +isinglass shield, thus casting a blue light over the entire stage. Use +a strong yellow light on the manger scene, the rest of the stage being +in darkness. + + +PROPERTIES. + +If it is possible have bits of white confetti or finely cut paper fall +from above during the shepherds' scene in Act II. + +The bases of the trees should be covered with cotton. + +Three rough crooks for the shepherds. + +Chimes to ring off the stage. A dinner gong or set of chimes will +answer. + +For the lamb use a white muff, being careful to shield it from the +direct gaze of the audience. + +A spray of cherries. + +A small bird of blue feathers. + +A ball. + +A crown and scepter made of gilded wood. + +A censor made of metallic butter dish suspended by chains. + +A fancy jewel case, supposed to contain myrrh. + +Bench in front of inn. + +Rude box in front of manger. + + +COSTUMES. + +MARY--A sweet-faced blonde. Long tunic of light blue, falling straight +from neck to the ankles. White stockings. Sandals. Hair in two long +braids either side of face. White veil draped around head and +shoulders, bound about the brow with circlet. Dark red mantle, +fastened to left shoulder and draped around body. This mantle may +trail on the ground. The tunic may be made of cotton crepon, the +mantle of dyed muslin. + +JOSEPH--A virile, bearded man of about fifty. Sandals. Long black +cassock, easily obtained from an Episcopal choir. Striped couch cover +may serve as mantle. This should be draped about head and body. Long +staff. + +SIMEON--An old man with white hair and beard. Tunic of potato sacking +falling in straight folds from neck to ankles. Large gray shawl serves +as mantle, draped on head and body. Long crook. Sandals. + +TIMOTHY--Man of forty. Costume similar to Isaac's. Striped mantle. + +ISAAC--Man of twenty. Shorter tunic similar to Simeon's. Fur rug +draped over left shoulder. Dark red drapery on head. Sandals. Brown +stripes criss-crossed on legs. Crook. + +ANNA--Long tunic of brown. Take a square white sheet and stripe it +with bands of dark blue. This serves as a mantle, draped over head and +body. Hair hanging. A woman of thirty-five. Sandals. If desired, a +blue veil may be draped around the head and neck and the mantle draped +over the body. + +THOMAS--A boy of seven. Sandals. Brown strips criss-crossed on legs +from sandals to hips. Short white tunic cut like a boy's nightgown, +but coming only to knees. Dark blue mantle. Small crook. + +RUTH--A girl of eleven. Blue tunic hanging in straight folds from neck +to three or four inches above ankles. Border of figured goods, to +simulate oriental embroidery, around bottom of robe and down the +front. This should be about two inches wide. Sandals. White stockings. +Hair hanging. White veil draped around head and shoulders. Later she +enters with striped mantle. + +DEBORAH--A dignified matron of about forty-five. Sandals. Long kimono +of solid color. Sash of yellow. Hair in two long braids on either side +of face. Yellow drapery over head and shoulders. Rich striped mantle +draped over the costume. + +RACHEL--Sandals. White tunic trimmed with red figured cloth to +simulate oriental embroidery. Red sash. Wreath of red roses on head. +Mantle made of a square white sheet with stripes of red sewed on it. +Bracelets, armlets and anklets of silver paper. + +PRISCILLA--Sandals. Light green tunic. Dark green mantle. Gold paper +armlets, etc. + +MELCHOIR--Tall, dark man with dark mustache. Long black cassock may be +borrowed from an Episcopal Church. Over this is a red or yellow +kimono. Sandals. Turban on head. This turban may be made from a calico +covered crown of an old derby, with red and white striped rim. He +wears many rich ornaments. Curtain chains around neck and on arms. +This costume may sometimes be borrowed from a lodge of Shriners, +Knights Templar, Royal Arch Masons or Odd Fellows. + +GASPAR--Similar to Melchoir. He is a young king aged about twenty-two. +Wear white drapery on head and over it a golden (paper) crown. May +wear sword. Sandals. + +BALTASAR--Old king with white hair. Long rich robe or kimono over a +cassock. Red sash. Red head drapery. Golden crown. Sandals. + +ANGELS--Invisible to the audience. + +PROLOGUE--Stately lady in trailing Grecian robe of white. Hair +powdered. This character should be played by a lady with distinct +dramatic ability. + +NOTE.--If it is desired to simplify these costumes, kimonos, cassocks +and cottas from Episcopal choirs, draperies of sheets and couch +covers, and sandals made of a sole bound to foot with brown cloth +cords, will answer admirably in the dim blue light. + +Nightgowns, dressing gowns, fur rugs, fur muffs opened, fur stoles, +opera capes, spangled tunics, window cords and chains, etc., will make +valuable substitutes for the oriental garments. + + + + +ANITA'S SECRET OR CHRISTMAS IN THE STEERAGE + +[Illustration: + +SANTA CLAUS JACK FROST ANITA HULDA + +SERGIUS MEENY BIDDY MARY PADDY MIKE + +TOMASSO DUTCH TWINS NEELDA AH GOO + +YAKOB HANS MIEZE SANO SAN] + + + + +ANITA'S SECRET OR CHRISTMAS IN THE STEERAGE + +A CHRISTMAS PLAY IN ONE ACT FOR SANTA CLAUS AND SIXTEEN CHILDREN. + + +CHARACTERS. + +SANTA CLAUS _Adult_ +JOLLY JACK FROST _Little Boy_ +ANITA, _a Little Italian Immigrant_ _Aged Eight or Nine_ +HULDA, _from Holland_ _Aged Ten_ +SERGIUS, _from Russia_ _Aged Nine_ +MEENY, _from Germany_ _Aged Seven_ +BIDDY MARY, _from Ireland_ _Aged about Eight_ +PADDY MIKE, _from Ireland_ _Aged about Seven_ +KLINKER } _Little Dutch Twins_ +SCHWILLIE WILLIE WINKUM} _Aged Four or Five_ +NEELDA, _from Spain_ _Aged Five_ +AH GOO, _from China_ _Little Boy_ +YAKOB, _from Denmark_ _Aged Six_ +HANS, _from Norway_ _Aged Four_ +MIEZE, _from Germany_ _Aged Six_ +SANO SAN, _from Japan_ _Little Girl_ + + * * * * * + +TIME OF PLAYING--_About One Hour and Fifteen Minutes._ + + +COSTUMES, ETC. + +_For notes on costuming, scenery and properties, see "Remarks on the +Production of the Play" at the end of the play._ + + +ARGUMENT. + +It is the night before Christmas and the scene is on a big ocean-going +vessel many miles out at sea. Down in the lower part of the ship, in +the steerage, is a group of poor little immigrant children who are +leaving the trials and troubles of the old world behind them and are +looking forward to the golden promises held out by our own "land of +the free and the home of the brave." But the hearts of the little +immigrants are sad. It is the night before Christmas, and how could +Santa Claus ever hope to reach them away out in the middle of the +ocean? Even the sleigh and the magical reindeers could never be +expected to make such a trip. + +Anita, a little Italian girl, alone has faith in the coming of the +good Saint. She is wandering around the ship when all of a sudden, +much to her surprise, she hears a mysterious noise in a great big +barrel, and who should jump out but little Jack Frost himself. Jack +assures her that Santa Claus really is coming to visit the ship, and +more than that, he is going to make an especial trip in an air ship! +And this is little Anita's secret. The children all fall asleep, but +Anita keeps watch for the mysterious aeroplane that will bring joy to +every little heart in the steerage, and, sure enough, just a little +before midnight Anita and Jack Frost look through a telescope and see +the lights of the approaching air ship. + +Soon Santa Claus himself is on board, and such a time as he and Anita +and jolly Jack Frost have in arranging a wonderful Christmas surprise +for the children. As an especial favor the good Saint decides to +awaken the children himself very early on Christmas morning. The clock +strikes twelve and it is Christmas Day. The bells of merry Christmas +are heard chiming in the distance, and Santa Claus and jolly Jack +Frost hold a Christmas morning revel with the little immigrant +children away down in the steerage of the big vessel. + + * * * * * + +SCENE: _The steerage of a large ocean-going vessel. Entrances R. and +L. Boxes and barrels down L. Box down R. Large barrel up L.C., with_ +JOLLY JACK FROST _concealed therein._ HULDA _is seated on a small +stool down R., taking care of_ KLINKER _and_ SCHWILLIE WILLIE WINKUM, +_who are standing near her._ MEENY _is seated down L. on a box; she is +knitting a woolen stocking._ SERGIUS, PADDY MIKE, TOMASSO, YAKOB _and_ +AH GOO _are playing leapfrog at C. of stage._ HANS, MIEZE, NEELDA +_and_ SANO SAN _stand at rear._ BIDDY MARY _is seated near_ HULDA; +_she is peeling potatoes. All sing._ + + + OPENING SONG. + +[Music illustration: + + 1. The ship is sail-ing ver-y fast, + We can't go out to play; + But Christmas Day is com-ing soon, + It is-n't far a-way. + + 2. We're sail-ing to A-mer-i-ca, + So far a-cross the sea, + We're hap-py lit-tle im-mi-grants, + Our hearts are light and free. + + 3. We're hap-py lit-tle for-eign-ers, + From far a-cross the way, + But soon we will be cit-i-zens + Of dear old U.S.A. + + Then clap, clap, clap to-geth-er, + Clap, clap, a-way; + The steer-age is a hap-py place-- + Tomorrow's Christmas Day.] + +(_On the words "clap, clap, clap together," the children hold left +hand horizontally in front of their chests, palm upward, raising the +right hand and bringing it down on the left with a sharp clap._ + +_Sing the first verse seated around stage. On the first four lines of +the second verse nod heads and smile at audience. On the line "We're +happy little immigrants," each one points to chest, nods head and +smiles broadly._ + +_For the third verse all rise and stand in couples in small groups all +around stage. On the first two lines of the third verse each one faces +his partner slightly, nods at him and shakes index finger of right +hand at partner. On "dear, old U.S.A." all make a deep bow to +audience. After third verse is completed, all form a circle and skip +around in time to the music, repeating the third verse. On "clap, +clap, clap together," they stand still and clap hands as before. When +the song is ended all resume former positions, as at the rise of the +curtain, but the boys do not play leapfrog._) + +TOMASSO (_seated on floor at C._). Tomorrow comes the great, grand +festival of Christmas, is it not, Paddy Mike? + +PADDY MIKE (_seated near him, nods his head_). Sure and it is. This is +the holy Christmas Eve. + +MEENY (_seated down L., knitting stocking_). The night of the day +behind Christmas is always Christmas Eve, ain't it? (_Nods head._) +Sure it is. + +SCHWILLIE. Und tomorrow we gets lots of Christmas presents always, me +und Klinker; don't we, Klinker? + +KLINKER. Sure we do. Leedle horses and pictures und candy und other +things also; don't we, Schwillie Willie Winkum? + +HULDA. That was when we were at home in Holland. It's different, +maybe, out here in this great big boat. Ven we get by the city of New +York next week then maybe we'll get some presents already. + +KLINKER. But good Saint Nicholas always comes the night before +Christmas; don't he, Schwillie Willie Winkum? + +SCHWILLIE. Sure. Won't he come tonight, Hulda? + +HULDA. How could he get way out here on the ocean already? Do you +think he is a fish? We ain't living at home in Holland no more. We're +way out on the Atlantic Ocean in a great big ship. + +MEENY. Ja, und I wish I was back at home already. So much have I been +seasick, mit der ship going oop und down, oop und down! Ach, it's +awful. (SERGIUS, TOMASSO, YAKOB, PADDY MIKE _and_ AH GOO _play +jack-stones._) + +KLINKER. But Saint Nicholas ought to come tonight, Hulda. I been a +awfully good boy, isn't I, Schwillie Willie Winkum? + +SCHWILLIE. Sure you is. Und I've been a awfully good boy, too. Isn't +I, Klinker? + +KLINKER. Sure. We've been awfully good boys. + +HULDA. Maybe even if Saint Nicholas don't come tonight, you can see +the great, big whale tomorrow. If he's a good whale he'll surely let +the leedle Dutch twins see him on Christmas Day. + +MEENY. Oh, I vant to see der whale. I've looked und I've looked und +I've looked, but I ain't even so much as seen his leedle tail yet +already. Und it makes me seasick to look so much, too. + +BIDDY MARY. Are ye sure it was a whale ye saw that day, Sergius boy? + +SERGIUS. Of course I'm sure. It was awful big. The biggest fish I ever +saw. Even in Russia we do not have such big fish as whales. Paddy Mike +saw it, too. + +PADDY MIKE. Sure and I did. And me two eyes nearly fell out of me head +with lookin' at it, it was that wonderful. He shot a big stream of +water right up out of his head, he did, and then he dived down in the +ocean again, and we didn't see him any more at all, at all. (MIEZE +_and_ SANO SAN _turn backs to audience and look over the railing into +the water._) + +HULDA (_to the twins_). There! Now if you get to see the great big +whale, that's almost as good as having old Saint Nicholas come, ain't +it? + +SCHWILLIE. Whales can't bring you no Christmas presents, can they, +Klinker? + +KLINKER. Und whales you can see any time. I'd rather have Saint +Nicholas, wouldn't I, Schwillie Willie Winkum? + +SERGIUS. Who is this Saint Nicholas they are looking for, Hulda? + +HULDA (_astonished_). Why, don't you know who he is yet? He's the best +old man that ever was. Und he comes the night before Christmas und +visits all the little children in Holland. + +MEENY (_proudly_). Und in Germany, too. (SERGIUS _goes to_ HULDA.) + +KLINKER. Und if they're good they get candy und oranges und toys und +things, don't they, Schwillie Willie Winkum? + +SCHWILLIE. Und if they're bad, they get a good big birch stick. But I +ain't been bad. I've been awfully good, isn't I, Klinker? + +KLINKER. Sure. Und me also. + +HULDA (_to_ SERGIUS). On Christmas Eve in Holland all the children +march around the streets, following one who carries a big silver star. +And the people who meet us give us money and gifts to help the poor. +Oh, Christmas time is just grand in Holland! + +KLINKER. Und we set out our leedle wooden shoes und old Saint Nicholas +fills 'em with candy. + +SCHWILLIE. Und we put a leedle bit of hay in our shoes for his good +old horsie, Sleipner. Dot makes him happy. + +MEENY. In Germany we call him Santa Claus, und he comes riding in a +sleigh drawn through the sky mit reindeers. Und we have Christmas +trees all lighted mit candles und things, und full of toys und paper +stars und angels und apples. But Santa Claus could never get out here +in der middle of der ocean. If he did maybe he'd get seasick already, +und all der reindeers would get drownded in der water. + +SERGIUS (_standing R.C._). In Russia there is an old woman named +Babouska who visits all the children on the night before Christmas. +She carries a big basket full of good things. + +TOMASSO (_seated on floor at C._). In sunny Italy the children all go +to midnight church on Christmas Eve, and when we make ourselves awake +on Christmas morning, our shoes are all full of candy and chestnuts +and figs and oranges. But of course on a big ship like-a this we'll +not get-a nothing at all. + +KLINKER (_crying_). But I want some presents already. + +SCHWILLIE (_crying_). Und me also. I want some presents, too. + +KLINKER. Und Saint Nicholas can't come. Oh, oh! He can't get out on +the big ocean. + +SCHWILLIE. Maybe he could float out on a piece of ice yet. Could he, +Hulda? + +HULDA. No. I don't think he's much of a floater. + +MEENY. If he did it would make him awful seasick. + +KLINKER. I wish we was landed in New York yet, so I do. + +SCHWILLIE. Where is Anita? She'll know. + +HULDA. Yes, Anita will know whether he is coming or not. She knows +almost everything. + +PADDY MIKE (_standing at rear L._). Here comes Anita now, and sure +she's having a grand time, so she is. + +ALL (_rising and going to rear, looking off L._). Here she comes. +Hurrah for Anita. (_Music: The same as for the Opening Song._) + +TOMASSO (_calling_). Anita, Anita, come here quick. We want you. + +ANITA (_outside L._). I'm coming. Wait a minute. I'm coming. + +_Music swells louder._ ANITA _dances in from L., all sing as she +dances around, waving her tambourine._ + +ALL (_singing to tune of the "Opening Song"_). + + We're sailing to America, + Away across the sea, + We're happy little immigrants, + Our hearts are light and free. + Then clap, clap, clap together, + +(_All skip around._) + + Clap, clap away; + The steerage is a happy place-- + Tomorrow's Christmas Day. + +ANITA (_comes forward to C. surrounded by the others_). Oh, I've just +had the grandest time. It was so superb, magnificent, sublime! +(_Extends arms in ecstasy._) I have-a been at the leetla window +watching the great, grand, magnificent ocean. It was all so blue and +so green and so purple--and the sinking sun is all shining on the +great-a, beeg waves, like-a sparkling diamonds. (_Use elaborate +gestures at all times._) And me, the poor, leetla Italian girl, gets +to see all this great-a, grand-a ocean. It is superb, magnificent, +sublime! Ah, I am so happy, I could sing and dance and kees everybody +on the great-a, grand-a earth! + +MEENY (_at L._). Vot makes you so happy, Anita? Maybe I'd be happy yet +also, if I didn't get seasick once in a while. + +ANITA. What makes me so happy, Meeny? It's the sun and the waves, and +the sunlight shining like diamonds on the great-a, grand-a ocean. Are +you not also happy, Biddy Mary? + +BIDDY MARY (_standing by_ ANITA). I am not. Sure, I niver do be having +time to be seeing diamonds on the great big waves. I have to be hard +at work, so I do, peeling the praties for our Christmas breakfast. + +ANITA. I watched the great-a red sun as he began to sink, sink, sink +way down in the ocean. And the beeg-a waves got more beeg and more +beeg and on top of them I saw long white lace fringe. The green silk +waves were all-a trimmed with white lace fringe. And sometimes I think +I see the leetla mermaid fairies dancing in the foam. Leetla green and +white mermaids with the long long-a hair. + +TOMASSO (_at R._). You make-a me seek, Anita. There is-a no such +things as fairies. + +ANITA. But I love to _think_ there is. It is a great, grand-a pleasure +just to think there is. Is it not, Meeny? + +MEENY (_stolidly_). Oh, sure. + +ANITA. And that is why we should all be so verra, verra happy. We can +think such-a lovely things. The poor leetla children at-a home, pouf! +They cannot think such things, because they have never seen such a +great, beeg-a ship, or such a great, beeg-a ocean-- + +SERGIUS. Or a whale. + +PADDY MIKE. Or a sailor man. + +HULDA. Or a nice little steerage bed built just like a shelf in the +wall. + +TOMASSO. Or the great beeg-a engine that makes the ship go. + +MEENY. Or the tons and tons of coal vay down deep by the cellar. + +SERGIUS (_mocking her_). Way down deep by the cellar! Whoever heard of +a cellar on board of a ship? You mean--down in the hatch. + +MEENY. Hatch? Vot is dot hatch? Dis ain't a chicken, it's a boat. +(_All laugh._) + +KLINKER (_takes_ SCHWILLIE _by the hand and goes to_ ANITA). Anita, we +want to ask you a question. + +ANITA. Well, and what is the question of the leetla Dutch twins? + +SCHWILLIE. Tonight is the night before Christmas. + +KLINKER. Und we want to know if the good Saint Nicholas is coming +tonight. + +ANITA. I don't know. You see it would be a great beeg-a, long-a trip +way out here on the ocean. + +KLINKER (_half crying_). But I want him to come. I've been a awful +good boy, isn't I, Schwillie Willie Winkum? + +SCHWILLIE. Sure, you is. Und me also, ain't I, Klinker? + +ANITA. If you have both been verra, verra good I think that maybe the +good Saint will come. (_Looks around._) Have you all been verra, verra +good? + +OTHERS. Yes, all of us. + +HANS. We're always very, very good at Christmas time. + +AH GOO. Me velly, _velly_ good. + +ANITA (_points off R._). See, way up there on the upper deck, are the +rich, grand-a ladies and gentlemen coming out from the great, beeg-a +dining-room. If you go and stand under the hole maybe they'll throw +you some oranges or candy. They're awful nice peoples on the upper +deck. + +MEENY. Let's all go right away quick. Maybe we'll get some oranges und +candy. + +KLINKER. Oh, how I do love oranges und candy, don't I, Schwillie +Willie Winkum? + +SCHWILLIE. Sure, und me also, don't I, Klinker? + +SERGIUS. Let us all go together. (_All come forward and sing to tune +of the Opening Song._) + + We're happy little immigrants, + We'll sing our happy song, + Our hearts are light, our faces bright-- + The good ship speeds along. + Then clap, clap, clap together, + Clap, clap away; + The steerage is a happy place-- + Tomorrow's Christmas Day. + +(_All the children except_ ANITA _go out at R., repeating the chorus +of their song._) + +ANITA. Surely the good-a Saint Nicholas will come tonight, because +there are so many, many verra good children on board this-a ship. +(_Counting on fingers._) There's Hulda from Holland and her two leetla +brothers, the Dutch twins, Klinker and Schwillie Willie Winkum. They +must have a great-a beeg-a Christmas present. And there's Sergius from +Russia, and Meeny and Paddy Mike and Biddy Mary, and Neelda from +Spain, and Yakob and Hans and Ah Goo and Mieze and leetla Sano San +from afar away Japan. They must all have the great-a, grand-a +presents. Maybe I could write old Santa Claus a leetla letter and tell +how good the poor children way down in the steerage have been. And +there's my cousin Tomasso from Italy. Oh, Santa Claus must bring him a +new violin. Then he can make-a the beautiful music on the golden +streets of New York. If there is anybody at all in the whole beeg +world who should have a nice-a, beeg-a Christmas, it is the verra poor +leetla children whose mammas and papas haven't got very much money. +But sometimes the good Santa Claus forgets all about the verra poor +leetla children--and that's the mostest saddest thing of all, for they +are the verra ones he should remember. When I get to be a great-a, +beeg, grand-a, reech lady in the golden streets of New York, ah! then +I will buy presents and presents and presents, and I will-a give them +to all the verra poor leetla children in the world. I wonder why it is +that the verra good Santa Claus sometimes forgets the poor leetla +children on-a Christmas Day. He never forgets the reech leetla +children, only those who are verra, verra poor. And that is a sad +misfortune. If I had-a nice-a Christmas present, with many candies and +figs and oranges, I could never rest until I had given something nice +to all the poor leetla children in the city--for that is what makes +the mostest happy Christmas of all. + +_Enter_ SERGIUS _from R. quietly. He comes down behind_ ANITA _and +places his hands over her eyes._ + +SERGIUS. Guess who it is. + +ANITA. Sergius! + +SERGIUS (_disappointed_). Why, I thought that you would think it was a +goblin. + +ANITA. Goblin? What is a goblin, Sergius? + +SERGIUS. It's a little, wee bit of a man with a long beard. And they +go around having a good time at night. They are always very active on +the night before Christmas. (_Looks cautiously around._) I shouldn't +be at all surprised if we should see some tonight. + +ANITA (_frightened_). Oh, Sergius, will they harm us? + +SERGIUS. Not very much. They just like to have a little fun, that's +all. We have lots of them in Russia. And I believe there are some down +here in the steerage. + +ANITA (_grasps his arm_). Oh, Sergius! Where are they? + +SERGIUS. Well, last night I could not sleep, so I got up and came in +here, and just as I was passing by that barrel (_points to barrel up +L.C. where_ JACK FROST _is concealed_), I thought I heard a noise. It +was like some one rapping on the barrel. Like this. (_Raps on another +barrel._) I thought it was a goblin and I never stopped running until +I was safe in my bunk with the bedclothes around my head. + +ANITA. Pooh! I'm not afraid. No leetla goblin man can make-a me +afraid. + +SERGIUS. They do wonderful things on Christmas Eve. But come; let us +go to the bottom of the stairs. The ladies and gentlemen are looking +down and Tomasso is playing his violin. Soon they will throw apples +and oranges down to us, and perhaps money. Come and see. + +ANITA. No, I'd rather wait here. + +SERGIUS (_crossing to door at R._). All right, but don't let the +goblin man catch you. (_Exits at R._) + +ANITA. The goblin man! Poof! There is no such thing as a goblin man. +In-a Italy we do not have such goblin mans. He said he heard something +rap, rap on the inside of the barrel. Poof! Sergius must have been +having one beeg, grand-a dream. Never in all my life did I ever hear +anything go rap, rap on the inside of a barrel. (_Stands close to_ +JACK FROST'S _barrel._) And if I did, I'd think it was a leetla, +weeny-teeny mouse. But a leetla, weeny-teeny mouse never could go rap, +rap on the inside of a barrel, try as hard as he could. It must have +been a dream. + +JACK FROST (_raps sharply on the inside of the barrel_). + +ANITA. Oh, what was that? I thought I heard something. (_Goes toward +barrel cautiously._) Maybe it is the leetla, teeny-weeny baby mouse. +(Rises on tiptoes to peer into the barrel.) I'll just peek in and see. +(_Just as she looks into the barrel_, JACK FROST _pops up his head +almost in her very face._) + +JACK FROST. Hello! + +ANITA (_starting back, very much frightened_). Oh! + +JACK FROST. Did you say oh, or hello? + +ANITA. I just said, oh. + +JACK FROST. Well, then, hello. (_Climbs out of the barrel._) + +ANITA. Hello. + +JACK FROST (_goes to her_). You aren't frightened, are you? + +ANITA (_at R._). Well, I'm a leetla frightened, but not verra much. + +JACK FROST. Why? I won't hurt you. + +ANITA. You came up so sudden. I never expected to find a boy in that +barrel. And you are such a queer looking boy. + +JACK FROST. Boy? I'm not a boy. + +ANITA. You're not? You look like a boy. You're not a girl, are you? + +JACK FROST (_indignantly_). Well, I should say not! I'm just a kind of +a sort of a kind of an idea, that's all. I'm your imagination. + +ANITA. I hope you're not a goblin. + +JACK FROST. Oh, no. I'm not a goblin. They're old and have long +beards. I'm not old at all. (_Twirls around on toes._) See, I'm even +younger than you are. (_Makes low bow._) I'm a pixie. + +ANITA. And what is a pixie? + +JACK FROST. I told you before, it's just your imagination. + +ANITA. You look like a boy. What is your name? + +JACK FROST. My name is Claus. + +ANITA. Claus! Why, what a funny leetla name. I never heard a name like +that in Italy. Claus what? + +JACK FROST. Santa Claus. Haven't you ever heard of Santa Claus? + +ANITA. Oh, yes; many, many times. But you _can't_ be Santa Claus. + +JACK FROST (_indignantly_). I'd like to know why I can't! It's my +name, isn't it? + +ANITA. But you are not the real, real truly Santa Claus. He is an old, +old man. A leetla fat old man with white-a hair just like-a the snow, +and a long, white-a beard. + +JACK FROST. Ho, you must be thinking of my daddy. + +ANITA. Your daddy? Is Santa Claus your daddy? + +JACK FROST. Sure, he is. I'm Jack Frost Santa Claus, Jr. Most folks +call me Jolly Jack Frost. The little fat man with the white beard is +my father. + +ANITA (_astonished_). Why, I didn't know Santa Claus had any leetla +boys. + +JACK FROST. Sure, he has. Who do you think takes care of the reindeer, +and who waters the doll-tree and picks the dolls? + +ANITA. Picks the dolls? Do the dolls grow on trees? + +JACK FROST. Yes, indeed, right next door to the taffy cottage, down +Chocolate Lane. I take care of the marble bushes and the popgun trees. +You just ought to see our wonderful gardens. + +ANITA. Oh, I'd love to see them. + +JACK FROST. We've got a Teddy-bear garden, and a tool garden, and a +furniture garden, and a game garden, and a candy garden, though most +of the candy comes from mines. + +ANITA. The mines? + +JACK FROST. Sure. We dig out just the kind we want. We have caramel +mines, and vanilla mines and mines full of chocolate almonds, and +rivers of fig paste and strawberry ice cream soda. They flow right +through the picture-book garden. + +ANITA. Oh, it must be the most wonderful place in the whole world. + +JACK FROST. And I help take care of it. I have fourteen little +brothers, and we're all twins. + +ANITA. And have you a mother, too? Has Santa Claus a nice-a, fine-a +wife? + +JACK FROST (_laughs_). Of course he's got a wife. Haven't you ever +heard of my mother. Her name is Mary. + +ANITA. Mary? Mary what? + +JACK FROST. Why, Merry Mary Christmas, of course. I thought everyone +knew that. + +ANITA. And does she go round the world with Santa Claus on the night +before Christmas? + +JACK FROST. Oh, no, she's too busy for that. She stays at home and +takes care of the gardens. + +ANITA. But what are you doing here on the ship? I should think you'd +be with your father. + +JACK FROST. Ah, that is a secret. You mustn't tell anyone. + +ANITA. How can I tell anyone when I don't know myself. + +JACK FROST. Well, maybe I'll tell you. + +ANITA. Oh, if you only would. I'd just love to have a great-a, beeg, +grand-a secret. + +JACK FROST. You can keep a secret, can't you? + +ANITA. Of course I can. Girls can always keep secrets. + +JACK FROST. Some girls can't. But I believe you really can. Your +name's Anita, isn't it? + +ANITA. Yes. But how did you know? + +JACK FROST. Oh, we know everything. How old are you? + +ANITA. If you tell me how you knew my name, I'll tell you how old I +am. + +JACK FROST. Well, I just guessed it. + +ANITA. Then why don't you guess how old I am? + +JACK FROST. Cute, ain't you? + +ANITA. Not so verra cute. I'm going on nine. + +JACK FROST. Then you're old enough to keep the secret. Now, first you +must promise you won't tell until tomorrow morning. + +ANITA. Cross my heart. (_She does so._) + +JACK FROST (_crosses to her_). Listen, then; here's the secret. (_He +whispers in her ear._) + +ANITA (_after a pause, while he is whispering_). He is? _He is?_ Oh!! + +JACK FROST (_nods his head wisely_). Yes, he is. + +ANITA. Honest? + +JACK FROST. Honest injun! + +ANITA. With his pack and presents and a Christmas tree and everything? + +JACK FROST (_nods head emphatically_). Yes, ma'am, every single thing. + +ANITA. Tonight? + +JACK FROST. Just before the clock strikes twelve, when all the little +children in the steerage are asleep. + +ANITA. But how will he get out here in the middle of the ocean? + +JACK FROST. Fly. + +ANITA. Fly? But he hasn't any wings. (JACK _nods._) He has? (JACK +_nods._) Really and truly wings? + +JACK FROST (_nods_). Really and truly wings. + +ANITA. I never knew Santa Claus had wings before. + +JACK FROST. He only bought them this year. + +ANITA. Bought them? (JACK _nods._) Then they didn't grow on him? + +JACK FROST (_laughs_). Of course not. He's coming in an air ship. + +ANITA. Why, I never knew Santa Claus had an air ship. + +JACK FROST. He's got the very latest twentieth century model. He only +uses the reindeer once in a while now. He can go much faster on an air +ship. (_Sits down._) Oh, I'm tired. + +ANITA. I didn't know pixies ever got tired. + +JACK FROST. You ought to see the work I've done today. + +ANITA. Here on the boat? + +JACK FROST. Yes, ma'am, right here on the boat. + +ANITA. Oh, show me. + +JACK FROST. I will. But it's part of the secret. (_Goes to rear L._) +Come here and I'll show you what I've been doing. + +ANITA (_goes to him_). It isn't anything scary, is it? + +JACK FROST. Of course not. (_Lets her peep through the curtain that +conceals the Christmas tree from the audience._) There; what do you +think of that? + +ANITA. Oh, oh! oh!! It's too great and grand and wonderful for words. +Oh, what a wonderful, wonderful secret! I'm so glad you've told me. It +is so much nicer to know all about it beforehand. I wish I could tell +Tomasso. + +JACK FROST. Well, you can't. It's a secret and you mustn't tell +anybody. + +ANITA. But are you really, truly sure he's coming? + +JACK FROST. Of course he is. That is our secret. + +ANITA. Oh, it's the grandest secret I ever had in all-a my life. I +will not tell a soul that he is-a coming. It will be a Christmas +surprise, and when I get to the beeg city of New York in America, I'll +always remember this great-a beeg, nice-a secret about old Santa Claus +and his nice leetla boy, Jack Frost. + +JACK FROST. What are you going to do when you get to America? + +ANITA. I am going to dance. My uncle, Pedro Spanilli, he haba de +grind-organ. Until last-a month he had-a de nice-a monkey, named Mr. +Jocko, but last-a month Mr. Jocko he die, and my uncle, Pedro +Spanilli, he send for me to take-a his place. + +JACK FROST. Take the monkey's place? + +ANITA. Yes, sir. I'm going to go round with my uncle and hold out my +tambourine, so! (_Poses and holds out tambourine._) And then I will-a +collect the pennies, just like-a Mr. Jocko used to do. + +JACK FROST (_mocking her_). I suppose you are going to wear a leetla +red cap and jump up and down this way (_imitates a monkey_), and say, +"Give-a de monk de cent!" + +ANITA (_laughing_). Oh, no. I'm going to sing the leetla song, and +dance the leetla dance, so! (_Hums and dances, or a song may be +introduced at this point by_ ANITA.) Then, when I'm finished, I go to +the kind leetla boy, Jack Frost, and hold out my tambourine, so! +(_Does so._) And maybe he drops a nickel in my tambourine. Eh? Does +he? + +JACK FROST (_sighs, then drops a nickel in tambourine_). Yes, I guess +he does. And you just wait till tomorrow morning, Anita, and I'll give +you the finest Christmas present on the Atlantic Ocean. + +ANITA. And you must not forget the leetla Dutch twins, and my cousin +Tomasso, and Hulda and Meeny and Sergius and Ah Goo and Sano San and +Needla and Biddy Mary and Paddy Mike and all the rest. + +JACK FROST. Whew! That's a big order. But we won't forget a single +soul on Christmas Day. And now I've got to go and put the finishing +touches on--you know what! (_Goes behind curtains that conceal the +Christmas tree._) + +ANITA (_looks around_). Why, he's gone. + +JACK FROST (_sticking his head out of the curtains_). The sun has set, +it's out of sight, so little Jack Frost will say good-night! +(_Disappears back of curtains._) + +ANITA. Good-night, Jolly Jack Frost, good-night. Oh, it's the most +wonderful secret in all the world. And won't the leetla children be +glad to know that old Santa Claus has not forgotten them. He said that +Santa Claus was coming tonight in the air ship, and it's got to be +true, it's just got to be true. + +_Enter_ TOMASSO _from R., carrying violin._ + +TOMASSO. Anita, if you don't hurry you'll not get any supper at all. +It's most eight o'clock. + +ANITA. Oh, I don't care for supper, Tomasso. I could-a not eat. I'm +too much excited to eat. + +TOMASSO. What make-a you so excited, Anita? + +ANITA. Why, tonight--(pauses as she remembers her promise) Oh, that I +cannot tell; it's a secret. + +TOMASSO. What is the secret? + +ANITA. If I told-a you, Tomasso, then it would no longer be a secret. + +TOMASSO. You should-a not have the secrets from me, Anita. I am your +cousin, also--I am the head of the family. + +ANITA. But I made the promise not to tell. + +TOMASSO. Who you make-a the promise to? + +ANITA. I promised Jack--(_hesitates_) I mean, I make-a de promise to +someone. + +TOMASSO. To Jack! Who is this-a Jack, Anita? + +ANITA. That is part of the secret. Listen, Tomasso, tomorrow morning +you shall know everything. Early in the morning shall I tell-a you my +secret. That will be my Christmas present to you. + +TOMASSO. All right. I'll wait. Oh, see, Anita, the moon is coming up. +(_Points to L._) Just like-a big, round-a silver ball. + +ANITA. Let us stay here and watch the moon, Tomasso. + +TOMASSO. You'd better go and get your supper. Those leetla Dutch twins +are eating everything on the table. I think they'd eat the table +itself if it was-a not nailed to the deck. Hurry, Anita! + +ANITA. I go. (_Crosses to door at R., then turns toward him_). It's a +awful good-a secret, Tomasso. (_Laughs and runs out at R._) + +TOMASSO (_looks off L._). Ah, the great, grand-a lady moon. She looks +at me, I look at her. Maybe she'll like a leetla serenade. + +(_Simple violin solo by_ TOMASSO, _accompanied by hidden organ or +piano. After he has been playing sometime, the other children come +softly in from the R. and group around the stage. Note: If possible, +get a boy for_ TOMASSO'S _part who can play the violin; if not, +introduce a song at this point. "Santa Lucia," found in most school +collections, would prove effective either as a vocal solo or as a +violin solo._) + +BIDDY MARY. Sure, that's beautiful. It takes me back again to dear +ould Ireland where the River Shannon flows. + +HULDA. What do you do in Ireland the night before Christmas, Biddy +Mary? + +MEENY. Do you have a Christmas tree like we do in Germany? + +BIDDY MARY. We do not. We don't have any tree at all, at all. + +PADDY MIKE. And we don't get many presents. But it's a fine time we +have for all that. Instead of getting presents, we have the fun of +giving presents--and that's the finest thing in all the world, so it +is, to make the other fellow happy. Sure, I just love to give +presents. + +KLINKER. You can give me some if you want to. + +SCHWILLIE. Und me also some. + +BIDDY MARY. But where would we be getting presents out here in the +middle of the ocean? In dear ould Ireland sure it's a fine time we're +after having on Christmas Day. + +PADDY MIKE. It is that. With the fiddles playing and the dancers +dancing and the fine suppers upon the table. + +SERGIUS. In Russia we always set a table in front of the window and +put a fine linen cloth on it. (_Produces white lace-edged cloth._) +Here is the cloth, but we have no window. + +HULDA. Here, use this box as a table. (_Indicates a large box at rear +C._) Now, let us put the cloth on, so! (HULDA _and_ SERGIUS _put cloth +on the box._) + +BIDDY MARY. The night before Christmas we always put a big candle, all +gay with ribbons, in the window to welcome the Christ child. + +PADDY MIKE. Here is the candle. (_Places it on box at rear C._) Now +I'll light it. (_Lights candle._) + +TOMASSO. We do that also in Italy. And we put a leetla picture of the +Christ child on the table. (_Puts colored picture of Madonna and Child +back of the candle._) + +BIDDY MARY. On Christmas Day it's the fine old tales we're after +hearing in Ireland, all about the wonderful star that shone so bright +that it turned night into day, and led the Wise Men all the way to +where a little Babe in the manger lay. + +PADDY MIKE. And all the angels sang above of peace on earth, good will +and love. + +BIDDY MARY. + + The shepherds wandering on the hill, + Beheld the star and followed till + They saw the Child and heard the song, + The angels sang the whole night long. + +SERGIUS. May the spirit of Christmas enter every heart tonight, making +all the world one big, happy family, no rich, no poor, no high, no +low, all brothers and sisters, all children of the Lord on high! + +MEENY. Maybe good old Santa Claus will come after all. Vell, if he +does I want to be ready for him. (_Produces two very large red +stockings, made for the occasion._) Come, Yakob and Hans and Mieze, +let us hang up our stockings here under the burning candle. (_They +hang up the four pair of stockings._) + +NEELDA (_places a wreath of holly on the table_). Christ was born on +the Christmas Day, wreathe the holly, twine the bay! Light and Life +and Joy is He, the Babe, the Son, the Holy One of Mary! + +TOMASSO. Meeny and Yakob and Hans and leetla Mieze have hung up their +stockings for the good-a Saint Nicholas, but in Italy we set out our +shoes, so! And we always get them full of presents. (_Places small +pair of wooden shoes on table._) + +MEENY. I like stockings much better than shoes already, because the +stockings can stretch yet, und if they stretch real, real wide out +maybe we can get a baby piano or a automobile in our stockings. Jah, +stockings is mooch better als shoes. + +HULDA. Here is my beautiful star. (_Produces tinsel star._) That will +remind us of the Star of Bethlehem that led the three Wise Men across +the hills and plains of Judea unto the little manger where, +surrounded by cattle and oxen, amid the straw, the Lord of Heaven was +born on Christmas Eve. + +SCHWILLIE. Und all the angels sang, "Peace on earth, good will to +men," didn't they, Klinker? + +KLINKER. Und all the shepherds heard them, and they followed the star +and came to the manger to see the little Baby. + +MEENY. Let us all sit down here in front of the candle and the star, +and see if old Santa Claus has forgotten us already. It's almost time +for him to be coming. (_All sit down._) + +ALL (_sing_). + + THE TIME IS NEAR. + +[Music illustration: + + 1. The time is near, the time is near, + San-ta Claus will soon be here! + All the world is sweet-ly sleep-ing, + An-gels now their watch are keep-ing, + And the moon shines clear, + And the moon shines clear. + + 2. Be-fore the dawn, be-fore the dawn, + Saint Nick will have come and gone! + Now with pa-tience we'll a-wait him, + Hop-ing noth-ing may be-late him, + On his jour-ney long, + On his jour-ney long.] + +HULDA. Oh, I do hope Santa Claus will come and visit us tonight. But +of course he cannot go every place. Some children have to be left out. + +KLINKER. Yes, that's so; but I hope it ain't us. Don't you, Schwillie +Willie Winkum? + +SCHWILLIE. Sure, I do. I wish old Santa would hurry up and come, +'cause the old Sandman is here already. I'm getting awful sleepy. + +KLINKER. Me--I'm getting awful sleepy, too. (_Stretches and yawns._) + +TOMASSO. I wonder what has become of Anita? She said she had a +wonderful secret that was-a verra, verra grand. + +MEENY. A secret, Tomasso? (_Goes to him._) + +TOMASSO (_standing at C._). Yes, a great, beeg, grand-a secret. + +BIDDY MARY (_goes to him and takes his L. arm_). Oh, what is it, +Tomasso? + +MEENY (_taking his R. arm_). Yes, Tomasso, tell us vot it is already. + +BIDDY MARY (_turning_ TOMASSO _around to face her_). Sure, if there's +anything on earth I _do_ love, it's a secret. + +HULDA (_and the other girls, surrounding_ TOMASSO). Yes, Tomasso, tell +us the secret; we'll never tell anyone. + +MEENY (_pulling him around to face her_). Sure we won't. Nice Tomasso, +tell us vot it is yet. + +TOMASSO (_hesitates_). Well, I---- + +BIDDY MARY (_pulling him around to face her_). Now, you tell _me_, +Tomasso. I never tell any secrets at all, at all. + +TOMASSO. Well, I---- + +MEENY (_pulls him around again_). If you're going to tell it, I want +to hear every word. I never want to miss noddings no times. + +BIDDY MARY (_pulls him back_). Neither do I. + +HULDA. Neither do I. + +MEENY. Neither do any of us. + +KLINKER. I don't want to miss nothing neither. + +SCHWILLIE. No, und I don't neither. + +ALL. Now, what is the secret, Tomasso? + +TOMASSO (_loudly_). It is not my secret. It is Anita's secret. + +ALL. Well, what is Anita's secret. + +TOMASSO. She wouldn't tell me. + +ALL (_turn away very much disappointed_). Oh! + +TOMASSO. She's promised to tell us all in the morning. She said that +would be her Christmas present to us--to tell us the secret. (_All sit +or recline around the stage. Lower the lights._) + +SERGIUS. It seems so strange to spend Christmas Eve away out here in +the middle of the ocean. + +KLINKER (_almost asleep_). Wake me up, Hulda, just as soon as Santa +Claus comes. + +BIDDY MARY (_at R._). Sure I think the Sandman has been after spillin' +sand in all of our eyes. I'm that sleepy I can't say a word at all, at +all. + +SANO SAN. They're putting out all the lights. Here, Sergius, hang my +little lantern in front of the candle. + +AH GOO. Allee samee hang mine. (SANO SAN _and_ AH GOO _each give their +lanterns to_ SERGIUS, _who lights them and hangs them on the table. +Note: Nails must be put in the table at R. and L. corners facing front +for these lanterns._) + +SERGIUS. I'm going to stretch out here and take a little nap. +(_Reclines on floor._) Be sure and wake me up, Hulda, just as soon as +you hear the bells on his reindeer. + +TOMASSO (_yawns_). I wonder what has become of Anita? + +HULDA (_stretches_). I believe I'm getting sleepy, too. + +OTHERS. So are all of us. + +BIDDY MARY. We're all noddin', nid, nid noddin', sure I think it's +time we were all of us fast asleep. + +ALL (_sing sleepily_). + + "WE'RE ALL NODDIN'." + +[Music illustration: + + 1. We are all nod-din', nid, nid nod-din', + We are all nod-din', and drop-ping off to sleep. + So see San-ta Claus we've all done our best, + [Transcriber's Note: probably should be "To see"] + But we're aw-ful-ly sleep-y, so we'll take a rest. + + 2. We are all nod-din', nid, nid nod-din', + We are all nod-din', and drop-ping off to sleep. + It's aw-ful-ly late, we'll no lon-ger de-lay, + But ride with the Sand-man, a-way and a-way.] + +(ALL _are sound asleep. Stage is dark._) + +KLINKER (_talking in his sleep_). Noddin', nid, nid noddin'. + +SCHWILLIE (talking in his sleep). Dropping off to sleep, ain't we, +Klinker? + +_Soft, mysterious music._ ANITA _dances in from R. She dances around +the stage, keeping time to the music and bending over the little +sleepers._ + +ANITA. Asleep! Every last one of them is verra sound asleep. Meeny and +Biddy Mary, and Sergius and Tomasso and the leetla Dutch twins and +all! (_Goes to curtain at rear._) Jack Frost! Jolly Jack Frost! Come-a +quick, come-a quick! They're all asleep. + +JACK FROST (_sticks his head out of the curtains_). Hello, what is it? + +ANITA. It is Anita. The leetla children are all here and sound asleep. + +JACK FROST (_coming down to her_). And so was I. They sang a song +about noddin', nid, nid noddin', and I just went to sleep myself. I +dreamed I was hunting a polar bear way up by the North Pole. +(_Yawns._) I'm still awfully sleepy. + +ANITA. I didn't know that you ever went to sleep. + +JACK FROST. You bet I do. That's the one thing I've got against my +daddy's Christmas trip every year. It wakes us all up right in the +middle of the night. + +ANITA. The middle of the night? What _do_ you mean? + +JACK FROST. Middle of the north pole night. If it wasn't for Christmas +we could go to bed about half past October and sleep until a quarter +of May, but ma thinks we ought to help pa and then wait up until he +comes home. My, I'm sleepy! Aren't you? + +ANITA. Oh, no, no! I'm verra too much excited to sleep. It's all about +my secret. Are you really sure he is coming? + +JACK FROST. Of course he is, and it's almost time he was here now. +It's nearly Christmas Day. Look way up there in the sky. You don't see +anything that looks like an air ship, do you? + +ANITA (_looking up and off at R._). No, I cannot see a single thing. + +JACK FROST (_sees table at rear_). Oh, look here! The children have +lighted a candle for him. That's just fine. It always pleases him. And +see; here's a picture and a wreath of holly and the star of Bethlehem. +And stockings and shoes all in a row. + +ANITA (_looking up and off R._). I can't see a thing. + +JACK FROST. Here's a telescope. Look through that. (_Takes home-made +telescope from his barrel._) Now do you see anything? + +ANITA. Oh, no; now I cannot even see the stars or the moon. + +JACK FROST. Of course you can't. You are looking through the wrong +end. Turn it around. + +ANITA (_looks up and off R. through telescope_). Oh, now I can see the +stars. And, oh, look! I see a leetla, teeny-weeny thing way, way +off--far up in the sky. Look, Jack Frost, is that the air ship? + +(_Fast music, played softly._) + +JACK FROST (_looks through the telescope_). Yes, I believe it is. + +ANITA (_dances wildly about the stage_). Oh, he's coming, he's +coming. I'm going to get to see Santa Claus! Is it not wonderful? I'm +going to see him. Let me look. (_Takes telescope._) Oh, it's getting +bigger and _bigger_ and BIGGER! + +_Sleigh bells heard outside at R., far away in the distance._ + +JACK FROST (_capering around_). Hurray! daddy's coming! daddy's +coming! + +ANITA. Now I can hear the bells. Oh, it's coming closer and _closer_ +and CLOSER. Look out, it's going to hit the boat! (_Small toy air ship +flies across the stage at rear, with tiny lights twinkling in it. +Stretch a wire across rear of stage and high up, for the toy to run +on._) + +JACK FROST. He flew right by us. + +ANITA. Maybe he didn't see the boat. Oh, now he isn't coming at all. + +JACK FROST (_looking out at L._). Yes, he is. He's landed right over +there. Here he comes; here he comes! (_Music and bells louder and +louder._) + +ANITA (_runs to L._). Here we are, Santa Claus. This is the place. +Come in. Merry Christmas, Santa Claus, merry Christmas! + +_Loud fast music. Enter_ SANTA CLAUS _from L._ + +SANTA CLAUS. Hello, there--where are you? It's so dark I can't see a +single thing. + +JACK FROST. Hello, daddy; merry Christmas. + +SANTA CLAUS (_shaking hands with him_). Hello yourself. Merry +Christmas to you, too. Are you all ready for me? + +JACK FROST. Yes, it's all ready. The magical tree is just waiting for +your touch to turn into a real Christmas tree. + +ANITA. Oh, we're going to have a real Christmas tree. + +SANTA CLAUS. Hello, who's this young person? + +JACK FROST. This is Anita. + +SANTA CLAUS. And why isn't she sound asleep like the rest of the +children? + +JACK FROST. She's such a good little girl that I told her she could +stay up with me and wait until you came. + +SANTA CLAUS (_laughs_). Oh, ho; so you've made a hit with my boy, Jack +Frost, have you? Well, if that's the case, I guess you can stay. + +ANITA. But all of the children would like to see you, Santa Claus. +See, they've prepared the candle and the wreath of holly and the star +of Bethlehem all for you. There's Sergius and Tomasso and Hulda and +Meeny and Hans and Yakob and Neelda and Ah Goo and Sano San and Mieze +and the leetla Dutch twins, Klinker and Schwillie Willie Winkum. +They've all been awfully good children. And Biddy Mary and Paddy Mike +they brought the candle. They're good, too. + +SANTA CLAUS. Hurry, Jack, and fill up the shoes and stockings. + +JACK FROST (_filling them from the sack_). Yes, daddy, I'm hurrying. + +SANTA CLAUS. It's just two minutes till Christmas morning. I've had a +hard night's work and I think I'll just take a little vacation here in +the steerage. + +ANITA. Oh, Santa Claus, may I wake up all the leetla children and let +them see you? + +SANTA CLAUS. Yes, just as soon as you hear the chimes announcing the +birth of Christmas Day. + +ANITA. And don't you have any other place to go this year? + +SANTA CLAUS. I hope not. Here I am in the middle of the ocean and my +air ship is just about played out. Jack, dump everything out of the +sack and we'll give the little immigrants the jolliest kind of a +Christmas. I'm not going to lug all of those toys and candy and things +back to the North Pole again. + +JACK FROST (_empties sack on floor_). Here they are, daddy. + +SANTA CLAUS. Now, where's the tree? + +JACK FROST (_goes to rear of the stage and removes the curtains that +have been concealing the dazzling Christmas tree._). There she is. +Isn't she a beauty? + +ANITA. Oh, it's the greatest, most grand-a tree in all the world. + +(_Faint chimes are heard in the distance._) + +JACK FROST. There are the chimes. It is Christmas Day. Merry +Christmas, daddy; merry Christmas, Anita. Christmas Day is here. + +ANITA (_dancing around_). Merry Christmas, Jack Frost! Merry +Christmas, Santa Claus! Merry Christmas, everybody! Merry Christmas to +all the world. Wake up, Hulda! Wake up! (_Shakes her._) + +JACK FROST. Wake up, Paddy Mike and Sergius! Wake up! Merry Christmas! + +SANTA CLAUS. Wake up, Meeny and Biddy. It's Christmas morning. And you +two little shavers, Klinker and Schwillie Willie Winkum, wake up and +give Santa Claus a good, old hug! + +(_The children all awaken. Rub eyes, stretch, etc._) + +HULDA. Oh, he's come, he's come, he's come! (_Runs and hugs_ SANTA +CLAUS.) + +SCHWILLIE. Me, too. (_Hugs him._) I said he'd come, didn't I, Klinker? + +(_Lights all on full._) + +KLINKER (_hugging_ SANTA CLAUS). Sure you did. And me, too, didn't I, +Schwillie Willie Winkum? + +MEENY. Oh, see the tree! The beautiful, beautiful Christmas tree. + +TOMASSO. And my leetla shoes are full of candy and toys. + +PADDY MIKE. Now, let's be all after giving three cheers for old Santa +Claus. (_The cheers are given._) + +ANITA (_bringing_ JACK FROST _forward_). And this is the leetla Jolly +Jack Frost. + +PADDY MIKE. Then three cheers for the leetla Jolly Jack Frost. (_The +cheers are given._) + +ANITA (_at C. with_ JACK FROST). This was my Christmas secret. Santa +Claus and the air ship and the Christmas tree and jolly Jack Frost and +everything. This was the secret. + +PADDY MIKE. Now all of yeez give three cheers for Anita's secret. +(_The cheers are given. Folk dance may be introduced. All sing +Christmas carol as the curtain falls._) + +CURTAIN. + + +REMARKS ON THE PRODUCTION OF THE PLAY. + +THE SCENERY. + +The stage should be set to represent the steerage of a large +ocean-going vessel. A good elaborate set may be arranged with very +little expense by following the diagram. The back drop should be of +light blue with a few cumulus clouds in white. The water line should +be about one-fourth from the bottom, and from this line downward the +scene should be darker blue, with white waves. + +The background may be made from canvas or paper, as desired. A good +effect has been produced by covering frames with tissue paper of the +desired shades, the clouds and the water lines being cut from white +paper and pasted on. + +A railing runs across rear of stage. This railing is made of wood, +with a tennis net serving for the wiring. Round life-savers are cut +from paper, painted and attached to the railing. The ventilator and +hatchways may be made from brown bristol board. + +A large Christmas tree, lighted and decorated, stands at rear L. This +is concealed by curtains. + +A square box or table stands at rear C. Several barrels and boxes are +at left front, and a box is at right front. A large barrel stands at +left of center near the rear. + +[Illustration] + + +PROPERTIES. + +Woolen stocking and knitting needles for Meeny. +Potatoes, knife, bowl for Biddy Mary. +Jack-stones for Sergius. +Tambourine for Anita. +Nickel (coin) for Jack Frost. +Violin for Tomasso. +White, lace-edged table cloth for Sergius. +Large candle decorated with red ribbons for Paddy Mike. +Bright picture of Virgin and Child for Tomasso. +Two large red stockings for Meeny. +Extra stockings for Yakob, Hans and Mieze. +Wreath of holly for Neelda. +Small wooden shoes for Tomasso. +Tinsel star for Hulda. +Telescope for Jack Frost. Made from a pasteboard roll covered with + black cloth. +Toy air ship on a wire, to sail across stage at rear. +Pack of toys for Santa Claus. +Sleigh bells for Santa. +Chimes heard outside. + + +COSTUMES AND SUGGESTIONS. + +SANTA CLAUS--High boots. Red or brown coat or mackinaw, trimmed with +fur (or cotton, dotted to imitate ermine fur). Cap to match coat. +String of bells around neck. Pack of toys. White hair, mustache and +long, white beard. Rosy cheeks. Do not wear a false-face, as this +often frightens little children and makes the character seem unreal. +When there are little children in the cast, their belief in Santa +Claus must not be disturbed and the adult portraying the character +need not attend the general rehearsals. The high boots may be shaped +from black oil-cloth and drawn on over black shoes. Use a pillow or +two to give an ample girth. + +JOLLY JACK FROST (aged 8 or 9)--A jolly, little chubby-faced boy who +can memorize and deliver a long part. White stockings and shoes. +Canton flannel suit of white, trimmed with long points cut from cloth, +to represent icicles. Long-pointed cap of white, coming down around +back of head and forming a long-pointed collar in front. The top point +should be wired into position. Face and hands are powdered very white. +Put small dabs of mucilage on the costume and sprinkle here and there +with diamond dust powder. Trim the costume with bits of cotton to +represent snow. + +ANITA (aged 8 or 9)--Dark hair and complexion. Black slippers with red +rosettes or bows on them. White stockings. Green skirt. Small dark red +apron, edged with white, black and green. Black spencer waist laced in +front showing the white underwaist. Puffed sleeves falling to elbows. +Green and red bows on elbows. Red silk handkerchief laid loosely over +the shoulders. Gold beads around neck. Large earrings may be attached +with court plaster. The headdress is a white oblong cloth, about six +inches wide and about eighteen inches long. This cloth is gayly +decorated with bands of red, green and black ribbons and the part on +the head is padded with a small square of pasteboard. Tambourine +decorated with red, black and green ribbons. A yellow silk +handkerchief may replace the Sicilian headdress above described. + +HULDA (aged 10)--A blonde girl with hair in two long braids. Wooden +shoes, white stockings. Several very full underskirts. Long skirt of +dark blue, made very full around the bottom. This skirt is patched +with squares of dark red and striped goods. Large blue gingham apron +edged with stripes of dark red. White waist. Blue bodice of same +material as skirt. Small white cap fitting close to head in back, but +turned back in front with points over each ear. Face round and rosy. +If the wooden shoes are not easily obtained, fair substitutes may be +made by covering an old pair of shoes with cream colored oil-cloth. + +SERGIUS (aged 9)--Black oil-cloth leggings to knees. Dark trousers. +Long Russian blouse of dark green coming nearly to knees and belted in +at waist with black oil-cloth belt. Blouse edged with dark fur. Dark +green cap trimmed with dark fur. + +MEENY (aged 7)--Full white waist. Black bodice laced with red. Rather +short red skirt, with black stripes sewed around bottom. White lace +apron edged with red and black. White mob cap, puffed high in front. +Red and black strings on cap which are tied under her chin. She +carries a gray woolen sock, half finished, and knitting needles. +Wooden shoes if possible. + +BIDDY MARY--Old shoes and ragged stockings. Old-fashioned dress, +rather short, of plaid gingham. Worn gingham apron. Little square +shawl of red and black checked goods, crossed on breast. +Old-fashioned, little black bonnet tied under her chin. She carries a +pan of potatoes and a knife. Her age is about 8. + +PADDY MIKE--Small boy of 7, dressed in a man's suit, cut down in a +clumsy manner. Green vest. Black swallow-tail coat. Little plug hat, +made by covering a pasteboard form with black cloth. Shoes, old and +worn, and many, many sizes too large for him. + +TOMASSO--Black slippers, white stockings. Red and yellow ribbons wound +around legs. Black knee breeches and zouave jacket. Striped sport +shirt. Red and yellow bows at knees and on shoulders. Red handkerchief +knotted loosely at throat. Black felt hat, turned up side, gayly +decorated with red and yellow ribbons. On his second entrance he +carries a violin. A dark complexioned boy aged about 9. + +THE DUTCH TWINS (aged 4 or 5)--Hair in Buster Brown style. Very full +blue trousers extending from under the arms to ankles. These are made +of blue denim and patched with large vari-colored patches. Wooden +shoes. Striped shirts. Dutch caps made of dark cloth, with a peak in +front and a crown about six inches high. The twins should be dressed +exactly alike and look as much alike as possible. Get chubby little +fellows and thoroughly rehearse them in their part; in fact they must +go over it so much that it must come as second nature to them on the +night of the performance. Much of the humor in the play depends on the +little Dutch twins. When they walk let them take long striding steps. +Use frequent gestures, nods, etc., in their dialogue, but be sure and +have every movement exactly the same at each rehearsal. These parts +are not difficult if the little actors are well trained, and their +success on the night of the performance will amply repay the trouble +spent in their proper coaching. + +NEELDA--A little brunette girl, aged 4 or 5. Yellow sateen skirt and +zouave jacket, trimmed with coarse black lace. Broad red sash tied on +the side. White baby waist. Black lace mantilla over head, and hair +dressed high with a high comb. Red rose over left ear. + +AH GOO--A chubby little Chinese boy of 5. White stockings, black +slippers, white pajamas, slanting eyebrows, small round white cap and +long pig-tail made of black yarn. Carries Chinese kite. + +YAKOB--Chubby boy of 6, dressed similar to twins, but in contrasting +colors. Wears yarn stocking cap. Wooden shoes. + +HANS--Tall, thin boy of 9. Dressed similar to the twins, but in brown. +Tall black cap similar to those worn by the twins. + +MIEZE--Little girl of 3 or 4, dressed similar to Hulda, but in dark +red and red and white checked gingham. + +SANO SAN--Little Japanese girl in kimono and sash. Eyebrows slanting. +Hair dressed high. Chrysanthemums over ears. Carries a paper parasol +or fan. + +The Christmas tree is for the whole school and is concealed during the +first part of the play by curtains. If there is to be no tree, all +reference to it may be omitted without injury to the continuity of the +play. + +Other songs may be substituted for the songs here given, but these +have proved very successful in several performances of Anita's +Secret. + + + + +CHRISTMAS WITH THE MULLIGAN'S + +[Illustration: + +PATSY MATSY PETER PAN MRS O'TOOLE + +MRS MULLIGAN TEDDY MAGEE PATSY & MATSY (3rd Act) + +MICKY MACHREE BRIDGET HONORA MARY ANN + +MELISSA CLARISSA NORA EUDORA] + + + + +CHRISTMAS WITH THE MULLIGAN'S + +A FUNNY CHRISTMAS PLAY IN THREE SHORT ACTS. + + +CHARACTERS. + +THE WIDOW MULLIGAN _With a Heart Overflowing with Sunshine_ +PATSY _Aged Twelve_ +MATSY _Aged Eleven_ +TEDDY MAGEE _Aged Seven_ +NORA EUDORA _Aged Fourteen_ +MICKY MACHREE _Aged Five_ +BRIDGET HONORA _Aged Ten_ +SWEET MARY ANN _Aged Eight_ +MELISSA _Aged Six_ +CLARISSA _Aged Six_ +WEE PETER PAN _Aged Four_ +MRS. O'TOOLE, _A Neighbor_ _With a Heart Overflowing with Kindness_ + + * * * * * + +TIME OF PLAYING--_About One Hour._ + + * * * * * + +_How they lived and what they wore will be told under the "Notes to +the Manager" at the end of the play._ + + +ARGUMENT. + +Sure, there isn't much argument at all, at all. It's all happiness and +merriment and love, and where there is happiness and merriment and +love there isn't any time for argument. The Widow Mulligan is a +cheerful washerwoman who lives in Mulligan Alley in Shantytown, +surrounded by her ten little Mulligans, to say nothing of the goat, +Shamus O'Brien. A good-hearted neighbor, Mrs. O'Toole, has a lively +time with the goat, but she forgives all his misdeeds as it is +Christmas Eve and the little Mulligans are starting out for a grand +Christmas entertainment. When they return they entertain their mother +and Mrs. O'Toole, and, incidentally, the audience. + +But let's have done with the argument and let the fun begin. + + * * * * * + +ACT I. + +SCENE: _The Mulligan's front room. Entrances at right and left. Window +at rear. At rise of curtain_ MRS. MULLIGAN _is discovered at C., +washing clothes in a tub._ BRIDGET HONORA _and_ MATSY _are hanging wet +clothes on a line, which runs across the rear of the stage._ + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_singing to a made-up tune as she washes_). + + Oh, give me a nice little home, + And plenty of suds in me tub, + And I will be happy all day, + With me rubby-dub, rubby-dub, dub. + + The queen on her golden throne, + Will envy me here at me tub, + For no one's as jolly as I, + With me rubby-dub, rubby-dub, dub. + + Sure, what would I do at a dance? + Or what would I do at a club? + But here in me kitchen I'm queen + With me rubby-dub, rubby-dub, dub. + + Oh, give me a nice little home, + And plenty of suds in me tub, + And I will be happy all day, + With me rubby-dub, rubby-dub, dub! + +MATSY. Maw, don't you think it's most time fer us to be going? + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Time to be going, is it? Well, I should hope not. Sure, +half of the children are not dry yet, and the other half are not +dressed. Bridget Honora, darlin', look in the other room and see how +they're coming on. (_Exit_ BRIDGET _at R._) + +MATSY. I think we ought to be there early, so as we can get a good +seat on the front row. I don't want to miss nothing. (_Hangs up a +boy's union suit._) + +MRS. MULLIGAN. True for you, Matsy, and I don't want yeez to be +missing anything either. It ain't like as if yeez go to a fine +Christmas entertainment ivery night of yer lives. (_Washes._) + +MATSY. It's the first one any of us ever went to at all, at all. Do +yeez think they be after having moving pictures? + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Of course not. Not in a Sunday School, Matsy. But +belike they'll have a fine, grand Christmas tree with singin' and +spaches and fine costumes and prisints for every one. (_Calls off +R._) Bridget Honora! + +BRIDGET (_off R._). Yes, maw? + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Come here. + +_Enter_ BRIDGET _from R._ + +BRIDGET. Melissa and Micky Machree have been scrubbed until they +shine. They're sitting in the window drying in the sun. Mary Ann is +cleaning Peter Pan in the lard bucket, and Patsy is washing Teddy +Magee in the rain-barrel. Nora is curling Clarissa's hair with the +poker, and somebody's untied the goat. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Untied the goat, is it? Matsy Mulligan, put on yer hat +at once and see what's become of Shamus O'Brien. He's a good goat, is +Shamus, but he's like the late Mr. Mulligan, he has a rovin' +disposition and a tremenjous appetite. Hurry now, Matsy. + +MATSY (_whining_). Aw, now, maw, I can't go and hunt the goat. I'm all +dressed up for the entertainment. If I go after the goat, sure it's +all mussed up I'll be. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Yis, if I swat you one wid this wet cloth, it's worse +than mussed up you'll be. Hurry after the goat. Niver a step does any +Mulligan take from this house tonight until Shamus O'Brien is safe in +the kitchen, wid his horns tied to the wash boiler. + +MATSY. Sure, I dunno where to look fer him. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Go over to Mrs. O'Toole's cabbage garden; like as not +ye'll find him there. Sure, Shamus has a fine appetite for cabbages. + +MATSY. Don't let 'em start afore I get back. I don't want to miss +nothin'. (_Takes cap and exits L._) + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Now, Bridget Honora, lave off hanging up the clothes +and go in and see if Melissa and Micky Machree are dry yet. And if +they are call me in and I'll attend to their costumes. + +BRIDGET. Maw, Mary Ann's having an awful time. She's growed so that +her skirt and her waist has parted company, and what she'll be after +doing I don't know at all, at all. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Is there anything she can use as a sash? + +BRIDGET. No'm. Nora and Clarissa have used up all the sashes. + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_takes fringed bureau cover from wash-basket_). Look +here, now, Bridget Honora, see what I've found in the wash. It's a +tidy to go on top of a dresser, but I'm thinking it's just the thing +to fill the gap between the skirt and the waist of Mary Ann. + +BRIDGET. Yes, maw. (_Exit R._) + +_Enter_ PATSY _from R. He runs in and is very much excited._ + +PATSY. Oh, maw, maw, come quick! Hurry, or he'll be drowned. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. What is it, Patsy? Spake quick. + +PATSY. It's Teddy Magee. I was givin' him a wash in the rain-barrel, +when all of a sudden, bad luck to him, he slipped through me fingers +and fell head-first down in the barrel. (_Cries._) Oh, it's drownded +dead he'll be. Oh, oh! (_Cries._) + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Oh, me baby, me baby! (_Rushes out at R._) + +_Enter_ NORA _and_ CLARISSA _from L._ + +NORA. Now sit right down there, Clarissa, and don't be moving a hair, +because you're all fixed and ready for the entertainment. + +CLARISSA. And how do I look, Nora? + +NORA. Ye look like a Christmas angel, so you do. Your hair curled just +lovely and your striped stockings will be the admiration and envy of +the entire Sunday School. + +PATSY. Oh, Nora Eudora, come on quick. Teddy Magee fell in the +rain-barrel and it's drownded dead he is intirely. (_Cries._) + +NORA. In the rain-barrel? How did he get in the rain-barrel? + +PATSY. Sure, I was washing him, I was. And he was that slippery with +the soap that he slid through me fingers and down to the bottom of the +barrel. + +NORA. Oh, the poor little Teddy Magee. (_Runs out R., followed by_ +PATSY _and_ CLARISSA.) + +_Enter_ MARY ANN _and_ PETER PAN _from L._ + +MARY ANN. And how de yeez like me new sash, Peter Pan? + +PETER PAN. Scwumptious. + +MARY ANN. It's a tidy cover off'n a bureau, and I don't want to wear +it at all, at all. Folks'll be after thinking I'm a bureau. Don't it +look funny, Peter Pan? + +PETER PAN. Scwumptious. + +MARY ANN. I'm not going to wear it, so I'm not. + +_Enter_ BRIDGET _from L._ + +BRIDGET. Mary Ann Mulligan, and what are yeez trying to do with your +nice new sash? + +MARY ANN. I ain't going to wear no tidy cover. Folks'll be after +thinking I'm a bureau. + +BRIDGET. Sure they'll think worse than that if yeez take it off. +That's what comes of yer growing so fast. Yer skirt is fer six years +old, and yer waist is fer six years old, and so you have to wear the +sash to help out the other two years. Sashes are awful stylish, +anyhow. It's pretty, too, ain't it, Peter Pan? + +PETER PAN. Scwumptious. + +_Enter_ MRS. MULLIGAN _from R., followed by_ PASTY _and_ NORA. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. It's lucky for him that there wasn't any more water in +the rain-barrel, or he would have been drownded dead sure. Patsy, yeez +had no business to let him drop. Nora, you go out and finish him. +Where's Clarissa? + +_Enter_ CLARISSA _from R._ + +CLARISSA. Here I am, maw. + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_looks her over carefully_). Well, you're all ready. +That's one. Nora and Patsy and Matsy are all ready. That makes four. +Mary Ann, are you all fixed? + +MARY ANN. Yes, mum, but I don't like me sash at all, at all. Folks +will all know it's a bureau tidy, it's got fringe and everything. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Oh, ho, me fine young lady. I suppose yeez want a +peek-a-boo dress all trimmed with mayonnaise ruffles down the bias, do +you? It's lucky for you I found that tidy in the wash, so it is. And +don't yeez eat too much or breathe hard or ye'll bust it, and then +where'll you be at? + +BRIDGET. Maw, Mary Ann's chewing her apron. + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_at the wash-tub_). Mary Ann Mulligan, take that apron +out'n your mouth. I niver saw such a girl to be always chewing +something. It's first yer dress and then yer apron or your petticoat, +whatever happens to be your topmost garment. Clothes were not made to +chew. + +_Enter_ NORA _with_ TEDDY, MELISSA _and_ MICKY, _from L._ + +NORA. Here they are, maw, all ready for the party. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Are ye sure they're all clean? + +NORA. I am that. They've been scrubbed until me two arms ache. And +Micky's had a bath in the rain-barrel. + +MICKY. I have that, and I don't want another one, either. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. All yeez sit down and let me look ye over. + +NORA. Have ye finished the washing, maw? + +MRS. MULLIGAN. For the prisint, yes. I have more important duties to +perform. Now, first and foremost, don't walk pigeon-toed. Bridget, +have ye got a clane handkerchief? + +BRIDGET. Yis, mum. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Well, don't forget to use it if the necessity arises, +and you'd better set next to Peter Pan so's he can use it, too. He's +been kinder nosey all day, and I shouldn't wonder if he wasn't coming +down with a cold in his head. How do you feel, Peter Pan? + +PETER PAN. Scwumptious. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Micky Machree Mulligan, and what are yeez looking +cross-eyed for? Do ye think it improves yer beauty? + +MICKY. I thought there was a speck of dirt on me nose. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Well, there's not, and hold yer head up straight. + +PATSY. Maw, ain't it most time to go? + +MRS. MULLIGAN. It lacks two hours yet of the time, and Matsy ain't +come back with the goat. Whatever's become of Shamus O'Brien I'd like +to know. Which of yeez seen him last? + +NORA. I saw him this mornin'. He was eatin' a tin tomato can down in +the alley. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. The poor thing! Now I suppose I'll have a sick goat on +me hands on top of all me other troubles--and tomorrow's Christmas +Day. + +BRIDGET. Maw, suppose they won't let us in the Sunday School at all, +at all. We don't belong to that Sunday School. What'll we do then? + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Indade they'll not turn yeez away on Christmas Eve. I +chose that Sunday School for yeez to attend because it's the largest +and the most fashionable in town. Mrs. Beverly Brewster goes there, +and wherever Mrs. Beverly Brewster goes, sure yeez can count on it, +it's bound to be most fashionable and select. + +MARY ANN. But we never went there before. They'll think it's awfully +nervy fer us to come buttin' in at their Christmas entertainment. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Niver once will they. They'll welcome yeez with open +arms and many Christmas prisints. And whatever yeez get be sure and +say, "Thank yeez kindly and much obliged." Can ye do that? + +ALL. Oh, yes, mum. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Clarissa, look out'n the door and see if ye see +anything of Matsy and the goat. + +CLARISSA. Yes, mum. (_Goes to door at L._) + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Mary Ann Mulligan, quit fooling with yer sash. If I've +told yer once I've told yer a hundred times it's liable to bust and +yer skirt and yer waist ain't on speakin' terms. + +CLARISSA (_at door_). Maw, here comes Mrs. O'Toole. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. It's the goat. He's been filling himself up on the +O'Toole cabbages. My, my, that goat'll be the death of me yet. + +_Enter_ MRS. O'TOOLE, _limping in from L._ + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Good evening, Mrs. Mulligan. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. The same to ye, Mrs. O'Toole. Come in and set down. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. I have no time to set down, and I have no inclination to +set down. And it's all on account of yer goat, Shamus O'Brien. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Me goat, is it? + +MRS. O'TOOLE. It is the same, and it's an injured woman I am this +night. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. My, my! I'll have to kill that old goat. He's entirely +too obstreperous. And did he chase you, Mrs. O'Toole? + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Chase me? He did worse than chase me. He caught up with +me. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. And where is he now? + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Niver a know do I know where he is. I left your boy +Matsy chasing him down the alley with a rope. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Bridget, go in the far room and get a wee drop of tay +for Mrs. O'Toole. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. I can't drink any tay. I'm that injured I can't drink at +all, at all. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. A drop of tay will warm ye up. Hurry, Bridget. + +BRIDGET. Yis, mum. (_Exits R._) + +MRS. O'TOOLE. I was out in me cabbage garden picking a bit of cabbage +for me owld man's Christmas dinner. I was bending over looking at the +cabbage whin all of a sudden I felt meself flying through the air and +I landed in the watering trough, so I did. And it was full of water. +And I'm almost killed entirely--and it's all the fault of your goat, +Mrs. Mulligan. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. There, now, Kathleen, darlin', sit down and take things +easy. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. I'll not sit down, Mollie Mulligan. Sure I'm thinking +I'll be after spindin' the rist of me life standing up on me two fate. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. So the goat struck ye, did he? + +MRS. O'TOOLE. He did. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. My, my, the trouble I've had all along of that Shamus +O'Brien. He's an awful goat, is Shamus O'Brien. + +_Enter_ BRIDGET _with two cups of tea._ + +BRIDGET. Here's the tea, mum. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Thank ye kindly, Bridget. Here, Kathleen, take a cup of +tay and let it soothe your wounded feelings. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Sure, it's more than me feelings that is wounded, Mrs. +Mulligan. (_Drinks tea._) + +CLARISSA. Maw, ain't it time we were starting for the entertainment? + +MRS. MULLIGAN. My, my, I've been that excited about the misdeeds of +that rascal Shamus O'Brien that I had forgotten the Christmas +entertainment entirely. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Sure, your family looks as though they were going out in +society, Mollie Mulligan. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. They are that. They're on their way to the fine church +entertainment at the Sunday School down the strate. + +NORA (_at door L._). Maw, here comes Matsy with the goat. (_Looks out +of door._) + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_goes to door and speaks off L._). Matsy Mulligan, tie +that goat in the back yard and tie all his four fate together. I'll +tach him a lesson, if it's the last thing I ever do. Patsy, go out and +help your brother tie up Shamus O'Brien. (_Exit_ PATSY _at L._) + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Nora Eudora, darlin', have ye got a sofy pillow handy. I +think if I had a couple of sofy pillows I could set down and enjoy me +tay. + +NORA. Yis, mum. Here's two of 'em. (_Arranges them in the chair._) + +_Enter_ PATSY _and_ MATSY _from L._ + +MATSY. Come on, all of yeez, or we'll be late for the show. And I +don't want to miss nothin'. + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_standing at R._). I think yeez are all ready now. Let +me see if there's anyone missing. (_Counting and pointing to each in +turn._) + + There's Patsy and Matsy and Teddy Magee, + Nora Eudora and Micky Machree, + Bridget Honora and sweet Mary Ann, + Melissa, Clarissa and wee Peter Pan. + +PATSY. We are all here, maw. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Now, yer all ready. Throw out yer heads. Forward, +march! + +CHILDREN. Good-bye, maw. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Good-bye, and the Lord love yeez all. Have a good time. +Good-bye. (_The children march out at L._) + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Ten of 'em. I don't see how ye ever manage to make both +ends meet, Mollie Mulligan, with ten big, healthy children--to say +nothing of the goat, Shamus O'Brien. + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_in door waving hand to children_). Good-bye. Have a +good time. (_Yells._) Mary Ann, don't let yer sash bust in two! +(_Crosses to R. and sinks in chair._) + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Ye have a fine family, Mrs. Mulligan. Ye have a fine +bunch of boys, and ye have a bunch of girls, and ye have a fine bunch +of babies; but ye have an awful goat. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Shamus O'Brien is the pest of me heart, Kathleen +O'Toole; so he is; but he's all that's left of me late husband's +property. Michael Mulligan thought the world of that goat, he did. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. I'm a peaceful woman, Mollie Mulligan, and a calm, +neighborly woman; but I don't like goats. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. I don't blame ye at all, at all, Kathleen. But poor +Shamus O'Brien was probably only nosing around fer a bit of Christmas +Eve dinner. I'll kape him tied in the future. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Sure and it is Christmas Eve, isn't it? + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Indade it is, and for the sake of the holy eve, I think +ye'd best be after forgiving the poor goat and not harbor any ill +feeling agin him on Christmas Day. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Harbor ill feeling, is it? Faith, then I'll not, Mollie +Mulligan, and it's meself that'll be bringing over a big cabbage head +on the morning for Shamus O'Brien's Christmas dinner. + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_rises_). I'll be after tidying up the house a bit. +It's little enough I've got for the children's Christmas tomorrow +morning; but at least I can have me house in order and a burning +candle shining in the windy. (_Lights candle and sets it on table in +front of the window._) + + This light shall burn on Christmas Day, + For Him who in the manger lay, + And all are welcome at my door, + The high, the low, the rich, the poor, + And every heart shall sing again + Of peace on earth, good will to men. + +MRS. O'TOOLE (_rises_). Your burning candle takes me back again to the +days of me childhood in County Clare. Well do I mind me last Christmas +Eve in ould Ireland, the little thatched cabin with its one window, +the stinging smoke of the peat fire, the lads and the colleens and the +ould piper--and the merry dances and songs, do ye remember, Mollie, +darling? (_Puts arms on hips, wags head from side to side and sings +briskly_:) + +[Music illustration: + + 1. Did you ev-er go in-to an I-rish-man's shanty, + Where mon-ey was scarce but where wel-come was plen-ty? + A three-leg-ged stool and a ta-ble to match it, + But the door of the shan-ty is al-ways un-latched. + + 2. Our nate lit-tle house, it looks out on the street, + There's two beau-ti-ful rooms and a pig-sty com-plete. + Each girl has a dress and each boy has a coat, + There's tin hap-py chil-dren, six pigs and a goat. + + 3. Sure the Mul-li-gans al-ways are hap-py and bright, + They sing in the morn-ing, they sing in the night, + Now Pat-sy and Mat-sy are strong as can be, + But the bil-ly-goat's strong-er than ath-er, you see! + + Tee-oo-dle, dum-doo-dle, dum-doo-dle, dum day! + Tee-oo-dle, dum-doo-dle, dum-doo-dle, dum day! + Tee-oo-dle, dum-doo-dle, dum-doo-dle, dum day! + Tee-oo-dle, dum-doo-dle, dum-doo-dle, dum day!] + +MRS. O'TOOLE (_sings briskly_): + + Did you ever go into an Irishman's shanty, + Where money was scarce but where welcome was plenty? + A three-legged stool and a table to match it, + But the door of the shanty is always unlatched. + Tee-oodle, dum-doodle, dum-doodle, dum day! + +(_Repeat until end._) + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_faces her, assumes same position, sings briskly_): + + Our nate little house, it looks out on the street, + There's two beautiful rooms and a pig-sty complete. + Each girl has a dress and each boy has a coat, + There's tin happy children, six pigs and a goat. + Tee-oodle, dum-doodle, dum-doodle, dum day! + +(_Repeat until end._) + +MRS. O'TOOLE (_sings_): + + Sure the Mulligans always are happy and bright, + They sing in the morning, they sing in the night, + Now Patsy and Matsy are strong as can be, + But the billy-goat's stronger than ather, you see! + Tee-oodle, dum-doodle, dum-doodle, dum day! + +(_Repeat until end._) + +MRS. O'TOOLE _hums the song faster and begins to jig, by kicking out +R. and L. foot alternately, on first three lines and twirling on +fourth line._ + +_At the beginning of the "Tee-oodle,"_ MRS. MULLIGAN _starts in and +does exactly as_ MRS. O'TOOLE _did on the first four lines, while_ +MRS. O'TOOLE _skips around stage in a circle._ + +_On the second verse they march forward and back, arms on hips. +Forward again. Do-si-do (backs to back). March forward and back and +then each twirls alone._ MRS. O'TOOLE _knocks over the table._ MRS. +MULLIGAN, _not to be outdone, knocks over the tub. The music becomes +faster and faster._ + +_On third verse they jig alone, then forward and back, forward again +and swing each other madly. While they are dancing they shout out +occasionally, "Huroo for ould Ireland!" "That's me fine lady!" "Look +at me now!" etc._ + +CURTAIN. + + +ACT II. + +_Same as scene before. The wash-tub has been removed, also the washing +from the line. The table has been straightened and_ MRS. O'TOOLE _is +seated there making a toy elephant._ MRS. MULLIGAN _is seated at L. +dressing a doll body in a baby's dress. The candle burns before the +window._ + +MRS. O'TOOLE. It's lucky for us, darlin', that me husband is out at +his lodge tonight. I can stay with you until the children return from +the entertainment, and maybe it's a bit of a Christmas Eve high-jinks +we can be having afterwards. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Indade, I'm glad to have ye, Kathleen. Will your +husband be long at lodge? + +MRS. O'TOOLE (_cutting the elephant's ears from brown paper_). He will +that. Pat is the Grand Exalted Chafe Ruler of the Benevolent and +Obstreperous Order of United Wooden-men, and he won't be home till +marnin'. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Is he now? The late Mr. Mulligan was niver much of a +lodge joiner but that made no difference to him; he niver came home +till marnin', lodge or no lodge. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Remember, Mollie, you're coming over to dinner with us +tomorrow. It's at one o'clock. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Oh, Kathleen, I can't be laving the children at all, at +all. On Christmas Day, too. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Of course you can't. Ye're going to bring the children +over with ye. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. The whole tin of them? + +MRS. O'TOOLE (_counting on fingers_). + + Patsy and Matsy, + And Teddy Magee, + Nora Eudora, + And Micky Machree, + Bridget Honora, + And sweet Mary Ann, + Melissa, Clarissa, + And wee Peter Pan. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. And ye're willing for the whole bunch of us to come? + +MRS. O'TOOLE. All but the goat. I draw the line at Shamus O'Brien. Ye +see it's this way. Me man, Pat, won a turkey in a raffle, and it's as +big as a billy-goat. Then on top of that me daughter Toozy, that's +married and lives in the country, sent us two chickens and a goose. +And there's only me and Pat to ate all that. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Kathleen O'Toole, it's a saint ye are. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. I says to Pat, says I, "Christmas ain't Christmas at +all, at all, unless there's some children at the dinner." "What'll we +do?" says Pat. "Invite the Mulligans," says I. And Pat was tickled to +death. We've potatoes and squash and cabbage from me own garden, and +we've oyster dressing and cramberries and stewed corn and apple +fritters, and it's meself that has made eight mince pies, and four +punkin ones--and I think we'll be after having a dinner on Christmas +Day that would do credit to ould Saint Patrick himself. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Sure, ye almost make me cry for joy, Kathleen O'Toole, +and after the goat trated ye the way he did, too. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. If a woman can't be neighborly and loving on Christmas +Day, Mollie Mulligan, sure I'm thinking she niver can be neighborly +and loving at all, at all. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. And ye're aven makin' a bit of an iliphant for wee +Peter Pan. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. I am that. Here's the little, fat body. (_Shows +cylindrical piece of dark green squash._) And here's the four legs. +(_Shows two bananas cut in half._) I'll just stick the legs on with +nails--and there he stands. Now, here's a little potato for a head, +and an ould skinny carrot for a trunk. I'll stick them on with a hair +pin. (_Does so._) Now, I'll stick on the ears and put in the +shoe-button eyes, and with this wee bit of black paper for a +tailpiece, and there ye are. Mr. Mumbo Jumbo Mulligan as natural as +life and twice as handsome. (_Shows elephant to audience._) + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Here's a doll baby I've dressed, but it's no head she +has at all, at all. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Use a big yellow apple or a wee yellow punkin, and put +on a baby cap--and there ye are. Stick in some buttons for eyes, and a +wee nose and mouth of red paper--and stick the head on the body with +some hair pins, and the quane herself niver had a better doll baby. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. I'll put her right here on the table alongside of the +iliphant. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. It's nine o'clock, it is. Isn't it time for the children +to be home? + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_goes to door at R._). It is that. (_Looks out._) And +here they come now. + +(_The children are heard outside at R., singing to the tune of +"Marching Through Georgia."_) + + The Mulligans are coming now, as happy as can be, + We've been to the Sunday School and saw the Christmas tree, + Had a lark with Santa Claus and take a tip from me, + We'll all be marching on Christmas! + +(_They march in from R., come down to front and line up._) + + Hurrah, hurrah, the Mulligans are here, + Hurrah, hurrah, for Santa Claus so dear, + Sure, it was a happy night, + The best one in the year, + And we'll be marching on Christmas! + + Patsy got a trumpet, little Micky got a drum, + Matsy got a spinning top, you ought to hear it hum, + Clarissa got a candy cane, oh, won't we have the fun, + When we are marching on Christmas! + + Hurrah, hurrah, the Mulligans are here, + Hurrah, hurrah, for Santa Claus so dear, + Sure, it was a happy night, + The best one in the year. + And we'll be marching on Christmas. + + Nora got a picture-book, Melissa got a rake, + Every Mulligan on deck got oranges and cake, + Got a bag of candy, too--and got the stomachache, + But we'll be marching on Christmas. + + Hurrah, hurrah, the Mulligans are here, + Hurrah, hurrah, for Santa Claus so dear, + Sure, it was a happy night, + The best one in the year. + And we'll be marching on Christmas. + +(_They march around stage while singing the chorus, but line up in +front while singing the verses. Use gestures to indicate the different +persons and their toys._) + +MRS. MULLIGAN. And did ye have a good time at the entertainment? + +BRIDGET. Indade and we did that. It was as good as a circus parade and +a picture show together. They treated us just lovely. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Did they now? And you wasn't invited at all, at all. + +MATSY. They gave us a seat way up in front, and Micky Machree acted +like a pig, he did. Sure, he grabbed two oranges. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Why, Micky, it's ashamed of ye I am. + +MICKY. I grabbed one to bring home to you, maw. I wanted you to have +some of the Christmas present, too. + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_hugs him_). That's just like your father, Micky. + +MRS. O'TOOLE (_helping children off with hats, wraps, etc._). And did +ye have a good time, wee Peter Pan? + +PETER PAN. Scwumptious, just scwumptious. + +MARY ANN. And me sash niver busted in two at all. And I was one of the +most stylish young ladies present, so I was. + +MELISSA. And they had a great, big Christmas tree. Clean up to the +ceiling. With lights and toys and candy and little stars and bright +fairies and angels and everything. + +PATSY. And ould Santy Claus was there with a long white beard and a +big pack of presents to everyone. + +CLARISSA. And I pulled Santa Claus' whiskers and they nearly fell off. +He must be getting pretty old, 'cause his whiskers is coming loose. + +BRIDGET. And Santy Claus called out all the names and everybody got up +when their names was called and he gave 'em a present. + +MICKY. And they never called our names at all, at all. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. That's because they didn't know them. They didn't +expect you at the party. + +MARY ANN. It was a surprise party, maw. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. How was it a surprise party, Mary Ann? + +MARY ANN. They all looked surprised when we came in. + +NORA. When I saw they weren't going to call out our names, I just rose +up in me seat and took the whole nine of 'em by the hand and marched +right up to Santa Claus. He looked real surprised at the bunch of us. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. I should think he would. + +NORA. "And who are you?" says he. "We're the ten little Mulligans from +Mulligan Alley in Shantytown," says I, as cool as an icicle. "And +we're ready for our presents, if it's all the same to you," says I. I +thought they was going to fire us out, but what did he do but dive way +down in the bottom of the sack and give every last one of us a +present? + +TEDDY. And then he gave us bags of candy and oranges and apples and +peanuts and popcorn and a candy cane, and then they had a show and +Bridget Honora spoke a piece, she did. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. How did ye happen to spake a piece, Bridget Honora? + +BRIDGET. I just stood up and told 'em I knowed one. There ain't +nuthin' bashful about me. And I kind o' thought we ought to do +something to help pay fer the good things they gave us. + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_petting her_). That's me good little Bridget Honora. + +MELISSA (_sees doll on table_). Oh, wee! Lookee there! Where'd she +come from? + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Santa Claus was after being here while you were away and +he left it for you. + +MELISSA. Is it all for me? + +MRS. MULLIGAN. It's the Mulligan dolly. It's fer all ten of yeez. + +PATSY. She can have my share. I don't want no dolls. + +MICKY. Oh, look at the efulunt. Look at the efulunt. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. That is Mumbo Jumbo Mulligan from the sunny shores of +Africa, way down in Louisiana. + +CHILDREN. Who's he fur? Who's he fur? + +PETER PAN (_takes elephant_). He's fur me. Scwumptious! + +TEDDY. Maw, they had a show there at the Sunday School. There was a +wee little man, about so long (_measures about two feet_), and he +stood up on a table and sang a song, so he did. + +PATSY. Humph! I know how they did that. Matsy and me can show it to +you. + +MELISSA. And they had the Turnover Topsy Turvies, too. + +CLARISSA. They stood upside down on their heads. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. My, my--but it must have been a wonderful show. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Just think what we missed, Mollie Mulligan. + +MATSY. I didn't miss nothin'. I never miss nothin' no time. + +NORA. We could give just as good a show our own selves. + +OTHERS. Let's do it; let's do it. Let's give a show for maw and Mis' +O'Toole. + +TEDDY. Would you like to see it, maw? + +MRS. MULLIGAN. If it ain't too late. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. What matters it how late it is? Christmas comes but once +a year---- + +ALL. And when it comes it brings good cheer. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Then sure we'll have the show. Poor folks can be just +as happy on Christmas Day as rich folks. It's all in the way you feel +about it. + +PATSY. Now, maw, you and Mrs. O'Toole take your seats out there in +front. (_Points to front row of the audience._) + +MATSY. I'll help you carry them out. (_They carry down two chairs from +the stage and seat_ MRS. MULLIGAN _and_ MRS. O'TOOLE _in the +audience._) + +PATSY. Now, we'll have to draw the curtain to get the stage ready. + +NORA. And while we're getting ready Mary Ann can say her piece. + +CURTAIN FALLS. + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_in audience_). My, my, Kathleen, what a large crowd of +people are here tonight. I'm afraid I'm not dressed up for the +occasion. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Dressed up, is it? Indade you are. Ye have on short +sleeves and a low-neck dress. What more would ye want? There's the +minister and his wife setting right back there. (_Speaks to them._) +Good avening, Brother ----; sure, it's a fine avening we're having, is +it not? + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_speaks to a lady in audience_). My, my, is it +yourself, Mrs. ----? Sure, I'm glad to see ye out. It's a long time +since I've had the pleasure of seeing you. (_Speaks to several +children._) And there's ---- and ---- and ----. I'm glad to see all of +yeez. Sure, some day yeez must come over to me house in Mulligan Alley +and I'll let you play with the goat, Shamus O'Brien. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. I see the young ladies over there, and each one of them +has a young man. My, my, it does me ould heart good to see the young +folks enjoying themselves. It ain't so many years since me and Pat was +courting each other just like the rest of yeez. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Mrs. O'Toole, do you see that young man sitting there +all by his lonesome? Ain't it a shame? And him such a good looking +young feller, too. I've a good notion to go over there and cheer him +up a bit. Maybe his girl is here with another fellow. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Sure, there's plenty of girls here without any fellows +at all, at all. Why should a young man sit all alone like a bump on a +log, whin there's so many handsome colleens waiting for the chance at +him? + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Whist, Mrs. O'Toole, it's making him embarrassed yeez +are. Will you look at the red color in his face? + +MRS. O'TOOLE. If ye ask me my opinion, Mollie Mulligan, sure and I +think he's after waiting fer one of yer own lovely daughters. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Well, he might go further and fare worse. Nora Eudora's +a fine girl, if I do say it myself. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Whist, here comes Mary Ann out in front of the curtain +to spake her piece. + +(MARY ANN _comes in front of the curtain, makes a bow and recites:_) + + LETTER TO SANTA CLAUS. + + Blessed old Santa Claus, king of delights, + What are you doing these long winter nights? + Filling your budgets with trinkets and toys, + Wonderful gifts for the girls and the boys. + While you are planning for everything nice, + Pray let me give you a bit of advice. + + Don't take it hard if I say in your ear, + Santa, I thought you were partial last year; + Loading the rich folks with everything gay, + Snubbing the poor ones who came in your way. + Now of all times of the year I am sure + This is the time to remember the poor. + + Plenty of children there are in our city, + Who have no fathers or mothers to pity; + Plenty of people whose working and heeding + Scarcely can keep all their dear ones from needing. + Now, if I came every year in December, + These are the ones I would surely remember. + + Once on a beautiful Christmas you know + Jesus our Saviour was born here below, + Patiently stooping to hunger and pain, + So He might save us, His lost ones, from shame; + Now if we love Him, He bids us to feed + All His poor brothers and sisters who need. + + Blessed old Nick! I was sure if you knew it, + You would remember and certainly do it; + This year, at least, when you empty your pack, + Pray give a portion to all who may lack. + Then, if there's anything left and you can + Bring a small gift to wee Peter Pan. + + _--Emily H. Miller.--Adapted._ + +MRS. O'TOOLE (_applauding vigorously_). Wasn't that dandy? Sure, +little Mary Ann has a wonderful education, so she has! + +MRS. MULLIGAN. She takes after her own mother. I was just like her +when I was that age. + +MRS. O'TOOLE. And you're just like her still, Mollie Mulligan. Sure +you're the sunshine of Mulligan Alley and the belle of Shantytown. + +MRS. MULLIGAN. Whist now! It's covered I am wid blushes. But, hush! I +think the show is about to begin. + + +ACT III. + +_Curtain rises disclosing the same scene. Three long sheets hang on +the line, reaching down to the floor and extending clear across the +stage. The children are behind the sheets. The line is about three and +one-half feet high. The table sets obliquely in front of the door at +R. It is covered with a sheet or long cloth reaching to the ground._ +PATSY _and_ TEDDY _form the dwarf._ PATSY, _coatless, has a long pair +of striped stockings on over his arms, and a pair of shoes on his +hands, ornamented on insteps with large rosettes._ TEDDY _stands +behind him and thrusts his arms as far as they will go under_ PATSY'S +_armpits. A kind of a tunic covers both. Wear a large crimped frill or +an enormous turned-down collar._ + +PATSY _stands behind table and places his shoe-clad hands upon it, +which represent the feet of the dwarf. The door curtains are fastened +together a few inches above his head, concealing_ TEDDY. + +PATSY _must lean slightly over the table or the legs will not appear +to support the body._ + +_When the curtain is up, enter_ MATSY _from L. dressed as a Showman._ + +MATSY (_bows to audience, speaks in a loud voice, using megaphone_). + + Come and see Jumbo, Samson symbolical! + Come and see Slivers, Clown really comical! + Come and see Zip, the foremost of freaks! + Come and see Palestine's Sinister Sheiks! + Eager Equestriennes, each unexcelled, + Most mammoth menagerie ever beheld, + The Giant, the Fat Girl, the Lion-faced Man, + Aerial Artists from far-off Japan, + Audacious Acrobats shot from a gun, + Don't miss the greatest show under the sun! + +Now, if you will kindly lend me your ears for a moment, I will fill +them free of charge with a few words concerning the world's greatest +assortment of marvelous monstrosities. In the first cell we have Senor +Macaroni Spaghetti from the land of the banana. The senor is +thirty-nine inches high, and, strangely enough, thirty-nine years old, +to say nothing of the fact that he weighs thirty-nine pounds. (PATSY +_scratches his nose with his foot._) He arrived last week by parcel +post to join our circus. The senor is looking for a wife. Oh, you +needn't laugh! It's true. Some of you near-sighted ladies should have +brought magnifying glasses, for Senor Macaroni Spaghetti is the +smallest speck of humanity that ever lived in captivity. He stands on +a silver dollar and puts his hand in a thimble. (TEDDY _makes funny +gestures during this entire speech._) The senor will now entertain you +in his entertaining way. + +PATSY (_sings_). + + SPAGHETTI FROM OLD ITALY. + + (Music on page 107) + + Me name is Spaghetti, I came o'er the sea, + To visit this land from old Italy, + I have a small monkey, he jumps with a string, + And if he was here to you he would sing: + (_Dances._) + Tee-oodle, dum-doodle, dum-doodle, dum day! + +(_Repeat until end._) + + I once fell in love with the sweet Antoinette, + She say she will marry the little Spaghett, + But she said she no like-a a hand-organ man, + So I stand on the corner and sell-a banan. + (_Dances._) + Tee-oodle, dum-doodle, dum-doodle, dum day! + +(_Repeat until end._) + + I wed Antoinetta and live in a flat, + I buy-a fine clothes and a big silk-a hat, + I make-a much money and this little gent, + He maybe some day will be big President. + (_Dances._) + Tee-oodle, dum-doodle, dum-doodle, dum day! + +(_Repeat until end._) + +MATSY. And now, ladies and gentlemen, I'll call your attention to the +seven little Sunbonnet babies. Behold them, them famous Mulligan +twins. (_Exits L._) + +_The heads of_ NORA, MICKY, BRIDGET, MARY ANN, MELISSA, CLARISSA _and_ +PETER _appear above the sheets at rear. Each wears a large sunbonnet. +They sing to the tune "Tramp, Tramp, Tramp!"_ + + Little Mulligans are we, and our hearts are light and free, + For it's Christmas Eve and soon we'll be in bed, + We're peculiar little folks, full of jollity and jokes, + And you ought to see us stand upon our head! + + Tramp, tramp, tramp, we'll soon be marching, + We are going off to bed, + But before we leave you now, + Each of us will show you how + Little Mulligan can stand upon her head. + +(_All disappear under sheet. They repeat chorus and hold up their arms +above the sheet. The arms are covered with stockings and shoes are on +their hands. They slap hands together, making feet dance, etc._) + + Tramp, tramp, tramp, we'll soon be marching, + We are going off to bed, + But before we leave you now, + Each of us will show you how + Little Mulligan can stand upon her head. + +(_Repeat._) + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_from audience_). Nora! Bridget! Mary Ann! What do ye +mane! You'll kill yourselves entirely. (_Rushes to the stage, followed +by_ MRS. O'TOOLE.) If you stand on your head like that, all your +brains will rush down into your fate. + +NORA (_head above curtain_). That's the way they did in the show. +(_All come out on stage._) + +MRS. O'TOOLE. Well, well, well, wonders will never cease. Sure, I +niver spint such a fine Christmas Eve in all me life before. + +MRS. MULLIGAN (_stands C. facing audience, surrounded by the ten +children._) Sure, I think we've had a fine Christmas celebration, +don't you? And before ye go let this sink down deep in your hearts and +minds--it doesn't take money and fine clothes and costly gifts to make +a fine Christmas at all, at all. All it takes is loving hearts and +loving hands, and merry faces of happy boys and girls. We didn't have +any money--but you see what a lovely time we've had--and it's all +because the spirit of Christmas was in our hearts--and the spirit of +Christmas means love, and love is the greatest thing in all the world. +Merry Christmas to all of yeez, and may ye never regret the time you +spent Christmas Eve with the ten little Mulligans. + +CURTAIN. + + +NOTES TO THE MANAGER. + +WHERE THE MULLIGANS LIVED. + +The scenery is very simple or may be dispensed with entirely. +Entrances R. and L. and a window at the rear are necessary. An old +table stands in front of the window, and a larger table, also old, +stands down R. Several soap boxes are down L. and these with an +upturned bucket serve as seats for the Mulligans. + +An old rag carpet covers the floor. A wash-tub, with wash-board, +clothes, etc., stand at C. Two rickety chairs are on the stage, one +R.C. and one L.C., the latter a rocking-chair. The larger table is +covered with a well worn red cloth and supports an old-fashioned +lighted lamp. + +Several tin cans, filled with bright flowers, stand on the table in +front of the window. Curtains or bed comforts are draped over the door +at R. An old sofa stands up L. Colored prints adorn the walls. + +A clothes line runs across the stage at rear. On this line several +garments are drying, bright stockings, a union suit, red flannels, +etc. Remember the scene is laid in Mulligan Alley and the stage must +be arranged according to Mulligan taste. + + +WHAT THE MULLIGANS WORE. + +MRS. MULLIGAN--Powdered hair, parted in middle and combed over ears, +somewhat unkempt. Well worn, old-fashioned cloth waist, with sleeves +rolled up and open in the neck. Skirt of contrasting color. The skirt +is turned up, showing flannel petticoat. Unstarched and rather soiled +dark gingham apron, of ample proportions, but without bib. Hair +twisted in knob at the back of head. Large, old shoes. + +MATSY and PATSY--Long, tattered trousers, old suspenders, large, well +worn shoes, calico shirts, torn and patched. Bright calico neckties. +Caps. In Act III Matsy wears a large black mustache, a long black +coat, much too large, and a stiff hat three sizes too big, while Patsy +wears the dwarf's tunic and has his face made up yellow, with rouge on +cheeks. + +TEDDY and MICKY--Short trousers, well worn and patched. Striped +stockings. Old shirts. + +NORA and BRIDGET--Ankle skirts, waists of a different color. Bright +calico bows. Large hair ribbons. + +MARY ANN, MELISSA and CLARISSA--Short skirts. Striped stockings. Old +shoes. Funny hats and waists. + +PETER PAN--Calico slip. Baby's hat. + +MRS. O'TOOLE--Old-fashioned walking dress of bright colors. Shawl and +little bonnet. Red wig, if desired. + + + + +THE WISHING MAN + +[Illustration: + + Type of Type of +WISHING MAN FRENCH DOLLS TIN SOLDIERS KA-ZIN-SKI + +GRANDPA GRANDMA FATHER MOTHER NURSEMAID + +DUMPLING TOOTSY SNOOKUMS ATTENUATED ROLY POLY + TOOTSY DUMPLING + +ENLARGED Type of +SNOOKUMS BEARS JIM DANDY BABY JUMBO] + + + + +THE WISHING MAN + +A CHRISTMAS WHIMSY FOR SWEETE CHARITIE. + +IN THREE SHORT ACTS. + +_As presented by Class No. 10, Wesley Chapel, Columbus, Ohio. +Re-written from memory._ + + +CHARACTERS. + +THE WISHING MAN _Young Man_ +THE ROLY-POLY DUMPLING _Stout Young Man_ +THE ATTENUATED TOOTSY _Tall, Thin Young Man_ +THE ENLARGED SNOOKUMS _Young Man_ +GRANDPA GREEN _Boy of Fourteen or Fifteen_ +GRANDMA GREEN _Plump Girl of same age_ +FATHER FRITZ _Boy of about Fourteen_ +MOTHER FRITZ _Girl of about Fifteen_ +NURSE MAID _Girl of about Thirteen_ +DUMPLING _Boy of Eight_ +TOOTSY _Girl of Seven or Eight_ +SNOOKUMS _Boy of Six or under_ +KA-ZIN-SKI _Tall Boy_ +TEDDY BEAR _Small Boy_ +JIMMIE BEAR _Small Boy_ +BABY JUMBO _Made of Two Larger Boys_ +ANNETTE _Little Girl_ +BABETTE _Little Girl_ +OLIVETTE _Little Girl_ +PRIVATE BLACK _Little Boy_ +PRIVATE JACK _Little Boy_ +PRIVATE MACK _Little Boy_ +JIM DANDY, _a Stick of Candy_ _Little Boy_ + + * * * * * + +TIME OF PLAYING--_About Forty-five Minutes._ + + * * * * * + +_For description of costumes, scenery, etc., see "Remarks on +Production" at the end of the play._ + + +ACT I. + +SCENE: _A room in_ FATHER FRITZ'S _house. Doors at R. and L. Small +table down L. with three chairs around it. Sofa down R. Easy chair +down C. Lighted lamp on table. Window at rear._ DUMPLING _is seated on +a rocking-horse at rear C._ GRANDPA _stands by him helping him rock +it._ TOOTSY _is on a rocking-horse at L. front, with_ FATHER _and_ +MOTHER _helping her rock it._ SNOOKUMS _is on a baby rocking-horse at +R. front, with_ GRANDMA _and_ NURSE MAID _in attendance. Very little +furniture on stage. If the rocking-horses are not easy to get,_ +DUMPLING _and_ TOOTSY _may be astride of sticks with horses' heads._ + +_Curtain rises to bright music._ + +ALL (_sing_). + + HOP, HOP, HOP! + +[Music illustration: + + 1. Hop, hop, hop! Nim-ble as a top, + Where 'tis smooth and where 'tis sto-ny, + Trudge a-long, my lit-tle po-ny, + Hop, hop, hop, hop, hop! Nim-ble as a top. + + 2. Whoa, whoa, whoa! How like fun you go! + Ver-y well, my lit-tle po-ny, + Safe's our jaunt tho' rough and sto-ny, + Spare, spare, spare, spare, spare! Sure e-nough we're there. + + 3. Here, here, here! Yes, my po-ny dear; + Now with oats and hay I'll treat you, + And with smiles will ev-er greet you, + Po-ny, po-ny dear! Yes, my po-ny dear.] + +DUMPLING (_dismounting_). Whoa, there, Jimmie! Oh, Grandpa, I do love +my pony. It's the best of all my presents. + +GRANDPA. Well, it's time you put him in his stall. + +TOOTSY (_dismounting_). I'm going to call my pony after Mr. ----. +(_Insert the name of some well known man._) 'Cause he looks just like +him. + +GRANDMA (_helping_ SNOOKUMS _from pony_). And what are you going to +call your pony, Snookums? + +SNOOKUMS. Going to call him Elizabeth, after you, Grandma. + +GRANDMA (_kisses her_). That's my baby! + +MOTHER. Grandma, we'd better get our hats and coats. It's nearly time +for the car to be after us. + +FATHER. Come, Grandpa. It's nearly eight o'clock. + +GRANDPA. But I don't like to leave the children. + +DUMPLING. And we don't like to have you leave us, either. My, this has +been the grandest Christmas day I've ever seen. + +MOTHER. Come, Grandma. (_Exits L. with_ GRANDMA.) + +GRANDPA. Come, children. (_They gather around him._) I'm glad you've +had such a happy Christmas. You got everything you wanted, didn't you? + +TOOTSY. Yes, everything. My, I wish Christmas would come every day. + +DUMPLING. Tell us the story about old Saint Nick, Grandpa. + +GRANDPA. Do you want to hear that old chestnut again? + +CHILDREN. Oh, yes, yes! + +GRANDPA (_takes_ SNOOKUMS _on his lap, the other children stand by his +knee._) + + 'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house + Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse; + The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, + In hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there. + The children were nestled all snug in their beds, + While visions of sugar-plums danced through their heads; + Grandma in her kerchief and I in my cap, + Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap,-- + When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, + I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter. + Away to the window I flew like a flash, + Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash. + + When what to my wondering eyes would appear + But a wee little sleigh and eight little reindeer, + With a wee little driver, so lively and quick, + I knew in a moment it must be Saint Nick. + More rapid than eagles his reindeers they came, + And he whistled and shouted and called them by name: + "Now, Dasher! Now, Dancer! Now, Prancer and Vixen! + On, Comet! On, Cupid! On, Donder and Blitzen! + To the top of the porch, to the top of the wall! + Now, dash away, dash away, dash away, all." + + So up to the housetop the reindeer they flew, + With a sleigh full of toys, and Saint Nicholas, too. + As I drew in my head and was turning around, + Down the chimney Saint Nicholas came with a bound. + He was dressed all in red from his head to his foot, + And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot. + His eyes, how they twinkled! His dimples how merry! + His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry. + He had a broad face and a little round belly + That shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly. + + A wink of his eye and a twist of his head + Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread. + He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work + And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk, + And laying his finger aside of his nose, + And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose. + He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle, + And away they all flew like the down of a thistle; + But I heard him exclaim e'er he drove out of sight: + "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!" + + --_Clement C. Moore._ + +CHILDREN. Oh, that was just lovely. + +TOOTSY. I just wish I could see him. Just once! + +DUMPLING. And so do I. I'm going to catch him some Christmas Eve. + +SNOOKUMS. Me, too! + +_Enter from L._, MOTHER _and_ GRANDMA, _wearing winter coats and hats. +They carry coats and hats for_ FATHER _and_ GRANDPA. + +MOTHER. Here, Grandpa, put on your coat and hat, or we'll be late for +the dinner. (_Helps him._) + +GRANDPA. I'd rather stay here and talk to the children. + +FATHER (_putting on his coat_). But Aunt Clara is expecting us. + +GRANDMA. And the auto is at the door. + +GRANDPA. Dumpling, are you sure you got everything you wanted for +Christmas? + +DUMPLING. I can't think of anything else. + +GRANDPA. If you didn't, and if all three of you children can agree on +anything else, it shall be yours if money can buy it. + +TOOTSY. Money can buy everything, can't it, Grandpa? + +GRANDPA. No, my dear, not quite everything. + +DUMPLING. But suppose we wish for something that money can't buy? + +GRANDPA. I'd try to get it for you some other way. + +TOOTSY. How, Grandpa; how? + +GRANDPA. Why, I'd tell the Wishing Man. He'd get it for you. + +GRANDMA. Come along, John; don't put such nonsense in the children's +heads. + +FATHER. We must hurry along to Aunt Clara's, children. But this is +Christmas night. You may all stay up tonight just as long as you wish. + +DUMPLING. Oh, can we? Can we? + +MOTHER. Yes. Cecelia will look after you. Cecelia? + +NURSE MAID. Of course I will, mum. + +MOTHER. Come along, now. We must hurry. (_Kisses the children and goes +out R. with_ GRANDMA, GRANDPA _and_ FATHER.) + +TOOTSY (_dancing around_). Oh, we can stay up just as long as we wish! +Goody, goody! Why that is the very best gift of all. + +NURSE MAID. Now you children be good, and if you want me, call out. +I'll be down in the kitchen with the cook. (_Goes out at L._) + +DUMPLING. Now we're left all alone. + +TOOTSY. I don't see why Aunt Clara couldn't have invited us to her +dinner party, too. + +SNOOKUMS (_playing with doll_). Snookums likes dinner party. + +DUMPLING. It's 'cause we ain't big enough. + +TOOTSY. My, I wisht I was a great, great, great big girl. + +DUMPLING. There, that's a wish that money can't buy. + +TOOTSY. Grandpa said he'd get us anything we wished for. + +DUMPLING. What do you wish, Snookums? + +SNOOKUMS. Wish Grandpaw would come home. + +TOOTSY. I know a real good wish. I wish it were Christmas every day. +Don't you, Dumpling? + +DUMPLING. No, I don't. We'd have to have a present and a tree and a +turkey and plum pudding every day of our lives. We'd get awfully tired +of it after a while. Just think, we'd have to give away about a +million presents every year. + +TOOTSY. I'll tell you what I really do wish. + +DUMPLING. What? + +TOOTSY. I wish we could do just like grown up folks do. I wish I was +the biggest little girl in all the world. + +DUMPLING. And I wish so, too. I wish we were just awfully, awfully, +awfully big--and then we could go to Aunt Clara's dinner party, and +everywhere. + +SNOOKUMS. Me wish me was great big Snookums. + +TOOTSY. But money couldn't buy that wish, Dumpling. + +DUMPLING. No, that's right. But Grandpa said if he couldn't buy our +wish he'd get it some other way. + +TOOTSY. How could he get it? + +DUMPLING. He said he'd tell the Wishing Man. + +TOOTSY. My, I wonder if there really is such a person! + +DUMPLING. I don't know. But I'd like to see him if there is. + +TOOTSY. I'll make a rhyme. + + Good Mr. Wishing Man, how do you do? + If there is such a person, we'd like to see you! + +DUMPLING. + + If you come from afar, if you come from near, + Good Mr. Wishing Man, appear, appear! + +_The_ WISHING MAN _rolls out from under the table, rises, faces the +three children, arms akimbo._ + +WISHING MAN (_after a pause, drawls_). Well? + +DUMPLING _and_ TOOTSY (_frightened, down R._). Well? (_They look at +each other, pause, then repeat._) Well! + +SNOOKUMS (_comes in front of them, stands facing the_ WISHING MAN, +_arms akimbo_). Well? + +WISHING MAN. Well, I'm here. + +DUMPLING. Who's here? + +WISHING MAN. Why, _I_ am here. You said you would like to see me and +so I have come. _I'm_ here. + +TOOTSY. Are you the Wishing Man? + +WISHING MAN. That's my name. (_Sings to the tune of "Wearing of the +Green." He sings briskly, shaking head in time and dancing a step or +two._) + + I'm the friend of all the children, + And I'll help you if I can, + Just tell me what your wishes are, + For I'm the Wishing Man. + I have wishbones on my fingers, + I have myst'ry in my eyes, + My clothes are trimmed with horseshoes, + And they're stained with magic dyes. + My pocket's full of rabbits' feet, + And clover leaves and charms, + For luck I've got a big black cat + All tattooed on my arms, + I'm a friend of all the children, + And I'll help you if I can, + So tell me what your wishes are-- + For I'm the Wishing Man. + + I come from a distant country + Away up near the pole, + But the things that I am telling you, + You mustn't tell a soul. + I know every witch and goblin, + And if you would believe! + I have fortunes in my pocket-book, + And wonders up my sleeve. + When any little boy or girl + Says, "Wishing Man, appear!" + I jump right up from underneath, + And here I am, my dear! + I'm a friend of all the children, + And I'll help you if I can, + So tell me what your wishes are-- + For I'm the Wishing Man. + +DUMPLING. And can you really grant us anything we wish for? + +WISHING MAN. I can, if it's a good wish--and if you all agree on the +same thing. + +TOOTSY. Anything in the wide, wide world? + +WISHING MAN. Well, pretty nearly anything. Would you like some new +toys? + +TOOTSY. Oh, no, thank you. This is Christmas, you know, and we got +ever so many toys. + +SNOOKUMS. Ever so many toys. + +WISHING MAN. I don't see what you called me for. You seem to have +everything you want. + +DUMPLING. Oh, no, we haven't. We've made a wish, and we're all agreed +on it. + +WISHING MAN. Are you sure it's a good wish? + +DUMPLING. Oh, yes, it's an awful good wish. You see, we want to be +great big children so we can stay up late at night and go to Aunt +Clara's dinner parties. That's our wish. We want to be the biggest +children there are anywhere. + +WISHING MAN (_laughs heartily_). Oh, ho, ho, ho! That's the funniest +wish I ever heard since I've been in the wishing business. So you want +to be the very biggest children there are anywhere, do you? + +TOOTSY. Yes, sir; that's just what we want. I want to be a great, big, +tall little girl. + +WISHING MAN (_laughing_). A great, big tall little girl, hey? + +DUMPLING. And I want to be a great, big, big, _big_ little boy. + +WISHING MAN. Oh, a big, _big_, BIG little boy, hey? + +SNOOKUMS. And so do I. + +WISHING MAN. And so do you, hey? + +CHILDREN. Yes, sir; that is our wish. + +WISHING MAN. Well, I'll have to see if I can accommodate you. It's a +pretty big job, you know. + +TOOTSY. You said you could give us anything we wished for. + +WISHING MAN. But I didn't think you'd wish for anything like that. + +DUMPLING. That's the only thing we want, Mr Wishing Man. + +WISHING MAN (_rubbing his chin and speaking thoughtfully_). Well, +now--let me see. I'm afraid it's too big a job for me. In the first +place I haven't any marble. + +CHILDREN. Marble? + +WISHING MAN. Yes. In order to make you grow and grow and grow, you'll +have to stand on marble. + +TOOTSY. We have a marble-top table in the front hall. + +DUMPLING. Oh, yes. And we can all stand on top of the table. + +WISHING MAN. But I have to stand here by the open window. + +TOOTSY. Well, we can go in there and leave the door open. You can stay +here and make our wish come true. Come on, Dumpling. + +WISHING MAN. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Are you all of you sure you +want to be made into great big, big little children? + +CHILDREN. Yes, all of us. + +WISHING MAN. All right. If that's your wish, it's no business of mine. +Go out in the front hall and climb on the marble-top table and I'll +see what I can do for you. + +TOOTSY. Oh, come on, quick, Dumpling, before he changes his mind. +(_Runs out R. with_ DUMPLING _and_ SNOOKUMS, _the latter taking very +long strides._) + +WISHING MAN. It's a very foolish wish, but maybe they'll be satisfied +if I make them the biggest children on earth. (_Throws back curtains +at the window._) I'll see what I can do. + +DUMPLING (_outside_). I'm standing up on the table now. + +WISHING MAN. + + Hickety, kickety, setting sun, + (_Making mysterious passes._) + Thunder, lightning, flash of a gun! + Let him grow bigger, it won't be much fun; + Hickety, kickety, number one! + +(_Lights flash out, then on again, then out. Low rumbles of thunder +heard. Lights on again, then off. Loud crash outside._) + +TOOTSY. Now it's my turn. I'm on the table. + +WISHING MAN. + + Witchery, twitchery, kangaroo, + Thunder and lightning, Kalamazoo! + Lengthen her, strengthen her, rip, bazoo, + Make her a giantess, number two! + +(_Lightning and thunder as before._) + +SNOOKUMS (_outside_). Now, Mr. Wishing Man, I'm on the table. + +WISHING MAN. That's the Baby Snookums. Very well, little Snookie +Ookums! I'll change you into the biggest baby on earth. + + Rumpety, thumpety, Kankakee, + Lengthen him out to six foot three! + The biggest baby we ever did see, + Rumpety, thumpety, number three! + +(_Same noises as before, only louder._) + +_Enter_ NURSE MAID _from L._ + +NURSE MAID. Goodness, gracious! Is it a tornado or an earthquake? +(_Sees_ WISHING MAN.) Oh! (_Screams loudly._) And who are you? Murder! +Thieves! Robbers! Where's me children? Where's little Dumpling and +Tootsy and Baby Snookums? (_Fast, loud music._) + +WISHING MAN (_yells_). Where are your children? + +_Enter_ BIG DUMPLING, BIG TOOTSY _and_ BIG SNOOKUMS. _They join hands +and dance around at R._ + +WISHING MAN. There they are. There are little Dumpling and Tootsy and +Baby Snookums. + +(NURSE MAID _looks at children, screams loudly, throws up her arms and +faints in a chair at L. of stage._ WISHING MAN _stands at C. with arms +akimbo, laughing at her. The three big children dance in a circle at +R._) + +CURTAIN. + + +ACT II. + +SCENE: _No scene at all. The action takes place in front of the closed +curtains. Note: During this act the managers should be arranging the +stage for the next act._ + +_The children who are present in the audience should be given seats +down in front. At this point they rise and go upon the stage in front +of the curtain and sing, accompanied by a chorus of older children +behind the scenes. An adult leader may appear with the children. All +sing, marching around platform and acting out the song:_ + + FOLLOW ME, FULL OF GLEE. + + Movement Song. + +[Music illustration: + + 1. Chil-dren go, to and fro, + In a mer-ry, pret-ty row: + Foot-steps light, fa-ces bright, + 'Tis a hap-py, hap-py sight; + Swift-ly turn-ing round and round.[A] + Do not look up-on the ground, + + 2. Birds are free, so are we, + And we live as hap-pi-ly; + Work we do, stud-y, too, + Learn-ing dai-ly some-thing new; + Then we laugh, and dance, and sing, + Gay as birds or an-y-thing: + + 3. Work is done, play's be-gun, + Now we have our laugh and fun: + Hap-py days, pret-ty plays, + And no naught-y, naught-y ways. + Hold-ing fast each oth-er's hand, + We're a hap-py, cheer-ful band; + + CHORUS. + + Fol-low me, full of glee, + Sing-ing mer-ri-ly. + Sing-ing mer-ri-ly, mer-ri-ly, mer-ri-ly, + Sing-ing mer-ri-ly, mer-ri-ly, mer-ri-ly, + Fol-low me, full of glee, + Sing-ing mer-ri-ly.] + +[Footnote A: They all twirl around.] + +(_The music continues softly as they resume their seats in the +audience. After a pause the_ WISHING MAN _sticks his head out from the +curtains. He takes one step in front, bows, then skips down to front +and bows again._) + +WISHING MAN. Hello, little boys and girls, how do you do this fine +winter night? I know what each of you has been thinking. You've been +wishing that _you_ could meet the Wishing Man and that he would make +_your_ wishes come true. Now, haven't you? Well, I've made that wish +come true. You wished to meet me, and here I am. I've been watching +you all the year in Sunday School. I know how you have worked over +your lessons, how you have helped your teachers and how punctual you +have been. To be sure, I know some of you haven't helped your teachers +as much as you could have done, but I'll forget all that at Christmas +time. Now tell me what you wish for most. + +CHILDREN (_in audience who have previously rehearsed this scene_). A +Christmas tree. A look at old Santa Claus. Some nice Christmas +presents, etc. + +WISHING MAN. Stop, stop. I can't attend to so many wishes at once. + +LITTLE GIRL (_rising_). Please, Mr. Wishing Man, couldn't you tell us +what we'd better wish for? + +WISHING MAN. Have you ever had a great, big Christmas tree? + +CHILDREN. Oh, yes, lots of times. + +WISHING MAN. Have you ever seen my old friend, Mr. Santa Claus? + +CHILDREN. Oh, yes. + +LITTLE BOY. We see him every year at Christmas. + +WISHING MAN. How would like to go with me to Wishing Land. + +CHILDREN. Oh, goody! (_Clapping hands._) That would be fine. Can you +take us there? + +WISHING MAN. Of course I can. And that's just what we'll do. We'll all +of us go to the Wishing Land. First, I'll call little Dumpling. +Dumpling, little Dumpling, where are you? + +BIG DUMPLING _comes in from behind the curtains._ + +BIG D. Here I am, Mr. Wishing Man. I was playing with my little horse +and wagon. (_He plays with tiny horse and wagon._) + +WISHING MAN. And how do you like being a great, big Dumpling? + +BIG D. Well, not very well. I'm always bumping my head on the doors +and things. And all my toys are so very little I'm always breaking +them. + +WISHING MAN. Where is your sister? Where is little Tootsy? + +BIG TOOTSY _enters._ + +BIG T. Here, Mr. Wishing Man. I'm here. Me and my little dolly. + +WISHING MAN. Well, little Tootsy, how do you like being a great, big +Tootsy? + +BIG T. I don't like it very well. My clothes don't seem to fit, and I +know I look awfully funny. (_To audience._) Don't I? Everybody laughs +at me and it always makes me cry. (_Cries._) + +WISHING MAN. And where is little Snookie Ookums? + +BIG SNOOKUMS _enters._ + +BIG S. Here I am, Mr. Wishing Man. Here's 'ittie Snookie Ookums. + +WISHING MAN. You look like a 'ittie baby elephant, Snookie Ookums. +Well, are you children satisfied with your wish? + +THE THREE. Not very much. We wish we were little again. + +BIG S. (_crying_). I tried to ride my little horsie and I bweaked him +all to pieces. + +BIG D. And I can't get enough to eat. My little knife and fork and +spoon are too little, and when I eat I swallow dishes and all. +(_Cries._) + +BIG T. And all my clothes are too little for me, and I look so funny +that everybody laughs at me. And I don't like it at all. (_Cries._) + +WISHING MAN. I'm just going to start on a journey to the Wishing Land. +The toys there are awfully big. They'd be just the right size for +you. Would you like to go with me? + +BIG S. Is it very far? + +BIG D. Could we get back by bedtime? + +BIG T. Wouldn't it be awfully cold flying through the air? + +WISHING MAN. Oh, no. We'd fly so fast you'd only have time to shiver +once and then we'd be right there. + +THE THREE. Oh, yes; let's go. + +WISHING MAN. All right. Now all of you part your hair right in the +middle, so you won't be heavier on one side than on the other. (_They +do so._) That's good. Now give me your hands and hold on tight and +we're off to the Wishing Land. Follow me, full of glee. + +(_All sing the first verse and chorus of "Follow Me, Full of Glee," +accompanied by the children in the audience. At the end all dance off +the stage at R._) + + +ACT III. + +SCENE: _The Wishing Land. Green or dark colored curtains at rear and +at sides. Use all the large palms and potted trees available. A +trumpet vine is attached to curtains at the rear. This is made of +branches pinned on curtain to simulate a vine. Several tin trumpets +are tied to the branches and many trumpets of various sizes made of +paper. These stick out of the vines like blossoms._ + +[Illustration: Fig. 1] + +_At rear right is a large tree with buds made of tissue paper and toy +drums showing in the buds. See diagram. The leaves forming these buds +should be pointed oval in shape and vary in size as they represent +buds or open flowers. The drums hang down from the branches and the +petals, when open, hang open and partly cover them. Another tree +stands at rear L. This is hung with candy or bits of colored paper +simulating candy. Candy canes are on this tree and_ JIM DANDY _is +sleeping at bottom of tree._ + +_At R. about half-way back are branches arranged to look as if +growing, and about three feet high, hung with balls of various sizes +and colors._ + +_At L. about half-way back are three little girls dressed as French +dolls. They stand in a row facing the audience. At either end of the +row is a frame to support the cheesecloth curtain that hides them from +the audience. They must stand stiffly with arms held out straight in +front of them._ + +_At L. front are several rows of flower pots or boxes containing +growing plants with dolls fastened among the leaves. These are +branches about eighteen inches high, with green paper buds partly +enveloping the dolls._ + +_At R. front is a large square box (a pasteboard cracker box or +breakfast food box covered with red tissue paper will answer) in which +is_ KA-ZIN-SKI _concealed by the lid._ + +_At R. half-way back just in front of the ball-trees stand three +little boys dressed as toy soldiers. They stand erect and do not +move._ + +_Curtain rises to mysterious music played by piano. This continues +some little time until the audience "takes in" the scene._ + +_After a pause, enter the_ WISHING MAN, _followed by the three_ BIG +CHILDREN. + +WISHING MAN. Well, here we are in the Wishing Land. My kingdom and not +a soul to welcome me! + +BIG D. Oh, what a beautiful, beautiful, beautiful place. + +BIG S. See 'ittie bitsy teeny weeny trumpets gwowing in twees. + +BIG T. And the dolls. The lovely, lovely dolls. + +WISHING MAN (_clapping his hands_). What, ho! Is there none to welcome +me? + +_Enter_ TEDDY BEAR _from L._ + +TEDDY BEAR (_comes to_ WISHING MAN _and bows low_). + +BIG D. Oh, see the Teddy Bear. + +BIG T. And he's the biggest one I ever saw. + +BIG S. Nice pussy, nice, nice pussy! (_Strokes_ TEDDY BEAR.) + +TEDDY BEAR (_growls_). + +BIG S. (_much frightened_). Oh, naughty, naughty, naughty! + +WISHING MAN. Hello, Teddy Bear. Where's your brother? + +TEDDY BEAR (_shakes head as if he does not know_). + +WISHING MAN. Go out and find him for me. Have you been a very, very +good Teddy Bear while I was away? + +TEDDY BEAR (_nods his head_). + +WISHING MAN. That's good. Now go out and find Jimmy Bear. + +TEDDY BEAR (_nods head and ambles out at R._). + +WISHING MAN (_looking around_). Everything is growing fine. I think +the bicycle trees need a little more water. Well, children, what do +you think of the Wishing Land? + +BIG D. It's awfully pretty. + +BIG T. It's perfectly gorgeous. + +BIG S. Wunnerful, simply wunnerful. + +WISHING MAN. Here's where I grow my toys. See, there is the trumpet +vine, and the candy tree and the dolly flowers. Whenever a little +child makes a wish for anything like that, all I have to do is to come +in here and pick a toy. See? + +BIG D. Oh, lookee at the tin soldiers. They're awful big. Can I have +one, Mr. Wishing Man? + +WISHING MAN. I don't think they're quite ripe yet. + +BIG S. Me want a twumpet. Want a nice, big twumpet to blow. + +WISHING MAN (_picks a trumpet_). There you are, my little man. + +BIG T. I want one, too. A nice loud one. + +WISHING MAN (_picks one_). And there's one for you, Tootsy. + +BIG D. Believe I'll take a drum. + +WISHING MAN (_picks a drum_). There you are. Right off the tree. + +BIG D. Now we'll have a parade. (_They march around stage playing +trumpets and drums._) + +WISHING MAN. Here, here, wait a minute. You're making enough noise to +wake the dead. Hold on, there. Quiet, quiet! + +BIG T. Oh, dear! Just as we were having such a lovely time. + +BIG S. Oh, whee! See the funny box. (_Goes to_ KA-ZIN-SKI'S _box._) +What is in it, Mr. Wishing Man? + +WISHING MAN. You'd better let it alone. That's Ka-zin-ski, and +Ka-zin-ski doesn't like babies. + +BIG S. But I wish to see him. + +WISHING MAN. Is it a wish? + +BIG S. Yes, sir; it's a wish. + +WISHING MAN. Then pull the string. + +(BIG S. _leans over the box, pulls a spring, the lid flies up and_ +KA-ZIN-SKI _pops out almost in the baby's face._ BIG S. _screams and +falls flat down on the stage._) + +BIG S. Oh, whee! Take him away! I'm fwightened, I am. Vill he come +after me? + +WISHING MAN. No, no. Get up, 'ittie Snookie Ookums, he won't hurt you. + +BIG D. Say, Mr. Wishing Man? + +WISHING MAN. What is it, my little boy? + +BIG D. Can we have anything we wish for here in the Wishing Land? + +WISHING MAN. Of course you can. That's what the Wishing Land is for. + +BIG D. Then I wish I was a little boy again. I'm too big to enjoy +myself. + +BIG T. And I wish I was a little girl again. Everybody laughs at me, +'cause I'm so big. + +BIG S. And I wish I was a 'ittie, teeny, weeny baby again. Being so +big fwightens me so. + +WISHING MAN. Oh, ho! So you all want to be little again? + +THE THREE. Yes, sir, if you please. + +BIG T. Why, I'm so big that I can't get all of me into bed. I'll have +to let my feet hang outside. + +BIG S. And if I get in my baby buggy, I'll bweak it all down. + +BIG D. And my mamma won't recognize me at all, 'cause I'm grown so +big. + +WISHING MAN. That's all very well, but it will be quite a job to make +you all little again. It will take three magic fern seeds, and I +don't think I have any ripe yet. + +(_Music, a march._ TEDDY BEAR _dances in in time to the music. He goes +up to the_ WISHING MAN, _pulls his head down and whispers something in +his ear. Then hands him a little box._) + +BIG D. Oh, what is it, Mr. Wishing Man? Is it the fern seed? + +WISHING MAN (_looks in the little pill box_). Yes, but it's only one +fern seed. Only one of you can be made little again. + +BIG D. Give it to my sister, Tootsy. She's a girl. + +BIG T. No, give it to Dumpling. He's the oldest. + +WISHING MAN. I think I'll give it to 'ittie Snookie Ookums. Here, +Snookums, take that little seed and go down by the pump and get a +drink of water. Put the seed in the water and swallow it and you'll be +the original 'ittie Snookums again. + +BIG S. Oh, goody, goody, goody! (_Takes box and skips out at R._) + +(_Music again, a march._ JIMMY BEAR _dances in, whispers to the_ +WISHING MAN _and gives him a pill box._) + +WISHING MAN. Here's another fern seed. Ladies first, Dumpling. I'll +give it to Tootsy. + +BIG T. Oh, you dear, good Wishing Man. I'll give you a nice hug and +kiss for that. (_Does so, takes box, skips out at R._) + +(_Music again. Enter_ BABY JUMBO, _dancing in time to the music._ +WISHING MAN _bends down and whispers to the elephant._ JUMBO _raises +one foot, a front one, and gives him a pill box._) + +WISHING MAN. And here's the third magical fern seed. Here you are, +Master Dumpling. Hurry along and grow little again. + +BIG D. Oh, thank you, sir. (_Takes box and skips out at R._) + +JUMBO _and the_ TWO BEARS _dance out at L. in time to the music._ + +WISHING MAN (_goes to the doll bushes_). The dolly plants don't seem +to be doing very well. (_Picks a doll._) Here's a ripe one. I'm going +to give that to (_insert some little girl's name_) for a Christmas +present. And here's another for ----. I wonder how my big French dolls +are doing. They're dreadfully hard to raise. They require so much +attention. I have to keep them under cover to protect them from the +sun. The wax melts so easily and the pretty red cheeks are apt to run +down over their pretty French dresses. (_Removes cover._) How nice +they look. There's Annette, Olivette and Babette. Three as pretty +little French ladies as ever came out of Paris. I think they're just +about ready to pick. They're such pretty dollies that I think I'll +give them to little boys instead of little girls. I'll give Annette to +(_insert little boy's name_) and I'll give Olivette to ----, and +little Babette I'll give to ----. My, my, I was forgetting all about +the children and the mysterious fern seed. I wonder if it has changed +them back into real little children again. (_Looks out at R._) Yes, +here they come. + +_Enter from R._ DUMPLING, TOOTSY _and_ SNOOKUMS. + +DUMPLING. Oh, thank you, Mr. Wishing Man. I feel ever so much better +now. + +TOOTSY. Yes, indeed. My clothes are a perfect fit and nobody will +laugh at me now. + +SNOOKUMS. I feel perfectly fan-tas-a-ma-gor-ious. + +TOOTSY. Oh, see the pretty French dollies. I wish they would talk to +me. + +WISHING MAN. If that's your wish, they can. + +TOOTSY (_presses_ ANNETTE). Can you talk? + +ANNETTE (_imitates talking doll_). Pa-pa, pa-pa, pa-pa! + +TOOTSY (_presses_ OLIVETTE). And what can you say? + +OLIVETTE. Ma-ma, ma-ma, ma-ma! + +SNOOKUMS (_presses_ BABETTE). Go on and talk to me. + +BABETTE. Mer-ry Christ-mas! Mer-ry Christ-mas! + +TOOTSY. I wish you could wind them up so they could walk around and +play with us. + +WISHING MAN. Is that your wish? + +TOOTSY. Oh, yes. Do you think you can do it? + +WISHING MAN. I can try. (_Takes large clock key and winds each doll. +The sound of winding should be imitated by a rattle behind the +scenes._) + +ANNETTE. Pa-pa, pa-pa, pa-pa! (_Walks forward without bending knees._) + +DUMPLING. Here, stop her. She'll fall down. (_Grabs her._) Here, turn +around. Walk this way. (_Walks with her._) + +OLIVETTE. Ma-ma, ma-ma, ma-ma; (_Starts to walk._) + +TOOTSY (_catches her_). Oh, I think you are a darling. (_Walks with +her._) + +BABETTE. Mer-ry Christ-mas! Mer-ry Christmas. (_Starts to walk._) + +WISHING MAN. Here, wait for me. (_Takes her arm and they walk +together._) + +DUMPLING. Wind up the soldiers. Then each dolly can have a partner. + +WISHING MAN. Just a minute. (_Winds up the soldiers._) + +(_The dolls continue walking around with jerky steps._) + +PRIVATE BLACK (_as_ BABETTE _passes him_). Allow me. (_Offers her his +arm._) + +PRIVATE JACK (_as_ ANNETTE _passes him_). Allow me. (_They +promenade._) + +PRIVATE MACK (_as_ OLIVETTE _passes him_). Allow me. (_They +promenade._) + +TOOTSY (_very much excited, runs to_ WISHING MAN.) Oh, I wish they +were all alive. + +WISHING MAN. You do? Is that your wish? (_She nods._) Then I'll make +them all alive. + + Hickety, kickety, bees in a hive, + Witchery, twichery, you're alive. + +(_The dolls and soldiers twirl around and chatter merrily in +pantomime. Their actions from now on are as natural as possible._) + +SNOOKUMS (_suddenly sees the candy tree_). Oh, lookee! Candy! + +WISHING MAN. That's alive, too. (JIM DANDY _marches down._) Mr. +Snookie Ookums, let me introduce you to Mr. Jim Dandy, a stick of +candy. + +SNOOKUMS. Would he mind if I'd take a bite out of his leg? + +JIM DANDY. You bet he would. I'm alive now. + +WISHING MAN (_looks off at L._). And here comes Teddy Bear and Jimmy +Bear. They're alive, too. And look at the Baby Elephant. + +_Enter_ TEDDY BEAR, JIMMY BEAR and BABY JUMBO. _The piano plays a +march. All march around the stage, first the_ WISHING MAN, _then_ +BLACK _and_ BABETTE, JACK _and_ ANNETTE, MACK _and_ OLIVETTE, JIM +DANDY _and_ TOOTSIE, TEDDY BEAR _and_ DUMPLING, _then_ BABY JUMBO +_with_ SNOOKUMS _riding on his back, then_ JIMMY BEAR _capering in the +rear. March around several times. A simple folk dance may be +introduced at this point. All sing two verses of "Follow Me, Full of +Glee."_ + +CURTAIN. + + +REMARKS ON THE PRODUCTION. + +The room was all in shimmering white with a background of small pine +trees in large wooden pots. The floor was covered with white muslin +and scattered with leaves, pine needles and cones. + +In one corner was a giant snow pile, made of a frame covered with +cotton. This was presided over by the Snow Queen and her Maids and +white-wrapped bundles were on sale for five cents. + +Jack Frost and his boys presided over a large tree in another corner. +Small toys wrapped in white tissue paper were attached to this tree +and sold for five cents. Or Santa Claus may preside at the sale. + +Snowballs of white popcorn and snowballs filled with candy were on +sale at another booth, presided over by red and white Striped Candy +Girls. Candy canes were also sold here. + +In the fourth corner a snow scene in the woods was depicted. A local +acrobat, dressed as a Snow-man, did stunts, assisted by several boys +dressed as clowns. They pelted the Snow-man with snowballs and then +sold bags of white confetti. The Snow-man also ran a game where +snowballs were thrown at a target. The target was a circle of black +cambric, the snowballs were rubber balls covered with raw cotton and +rolled in flour. Balls sold three for five cents. + +A postoffice in charge of Mrs. Santa Claus is recommended, where each +pays five cents postage due for packages and postcards. + +If snowballing the target is too "mussy," a large holly wreath with a +cluster of sleighbells in the center may be suspended from the ceiling +with red and green streamers. Three balls of soft rubber are provided +and the contestants try to throw the balls through the wreath and ring +the bells. + +Stuffed stockings on a clothesline may be offered for sale. This +should be presided over by Moll Pitcher and her colonial wash-maids. + +A rummage sale of toys added quite a large sum to the general fund. +There was a 5-cent table, a 10-cent table and a 25-cent table. + + +THE SCENERY FOR THE PLAY. + +The rear of the stage should be hung with dark curtains. Arrange the +trumpet vine and the trees in place before the play begins. Then hide +them with screens, these screens serving as the "scenery" for Act I. + +During the progress of Act II, in front of the front curtain, remove +the screens and furniture of Act I and arrange the stage for Act III +as described in the text. + +For the thunder effect in Act I rattle a large sheet of sheet-iron and +explode several large fire-crackers. + +The arrangement of the stage in Acts I and III is fully described in +the text. + + +PROPERTIES. + +Table with long cover completely hiding the Wishing Man. + +Lighted lamp on table. Chairs and sofa. + +Window at rear. Two curtains can simulate a window. + +Trumpet vine with tin and paper trumpets. + +Drum tree with tissue paper buds and toy drums. + +Candy tree. + +Ball plants. + +Frame to hide the French dolls. + +Doll plants. + +Pasteboard box with cover for Ka-zin-ski. + +Three small pill boxes. + + +COSTUMES. + +THE WISHING MAN--Dressed as a clown, white suit with red horseshoes on +it. Red ruffles around arms, ankles and neck. Long, pointed, white +clown cap. Face and neck should be covered with white grease paint and +when it is dry apply white powder. Then blacken the nose and lips with +hot black grease paint. Make tiny high eyebrows of this black paint +and paint round black circles on cheek bones. + +GRANDPA, GRANDMA, FATHER and MOTHER should be dressed in modern +costume, but they must be made up and costumed to look the part. + +NURSE MAID--Black dress, long. White apron, collar, cap and cuffs. + +DUMPLING, TOOTSY and SNOOKUMS--Pretty dresses suitable for Christmas. + +THE BIG DUMPLING, TOOTSY and SNOOKUMS--Dressed exactly like their +little counterparts. Wigs, etc. + +KA-ZIN-SKI--Tall boy dressed as a clown. False face. Bushy whiskers +and wig. A regular jack-in-the-box make-up. + +THE TIN SOLDIERS--Long trousers of shiny blue cambric with red stripes +at the sides. Shiny red jackets with yellow bands and buttons across +front and on sleeves. Toy guns. The cheeks and lips should be very red +to imitate toy soldiers. + +THE FRENCH DOLLS--Fancy dresses and bonnets. Hair in curls. Faces +painted to represent wax dollies, red cheeks, eyebrows black, +eyelashes beaded with black hot grease paint. + +JIM DANDY--Red and white striped stockings. From the knee to under the +arms the suit is a cylindrical roll of white pasteboard striped with +red. Sleeves and collar white striped with red. Pointed white cap +striped with red. + +THE BEARS--Costumes of brown canton flannel, fuzzy side out. Get a +pattern for a child's nightdress with feet. Allow it rather loose in +front, so that a folded knit shawl can be securely fastened (with +safety pins) to the shoulders in front, beneath it, thus making the +round body of the bear. For the back of the suit do not cut the waist +part separate from the legs, as is usual in the pattern, but allow the +waist to be as wide as the seat of the drawers. + +Then lay a pleat from A to B on either side, tapering to form a loose +fit below the waist. Sew thumbless mittens to the ends of the sleeves, +padding them a little on the back and sewing on palms of a light tan, +to represent paws. + +[Illustration: Fig. 2] + +Fit the seat of the drawers at the back loose enough to give freedom +of motion, but no more. + +For the heads, cut hoods like Fig. 3, taking a straight piece of cloth +and fitting it with pleats around the face, etc. Make ears of two +thicknesses of the cloth, stitched and turned like Fig. 4. Lay a +box-pleat at A-B and sew them to the hood at C-D, so that they will +stand out and forward. See Fig. 5. Sew this hood to the neck of the +suit, so that all goes on together. Bear false faces. + +[Illustration: Fig. 3] + +[Illustration: Fig. 4] + +[Illustration: Fig. 5] + +BABY JUMBO--Two medium sized boys form the elephant. Two four-foot +sticks are fastened together with twenty-inch crosspieces, thus: +[Illustration] Forming a rack which two boys carry on their +shoulders. Cut two pieces from gray cambric like Fig. 6 to form the +head, having the trunk about a yard long; sew them together and stuff +with rags; sew on white pasteboard tusks, large buttons for eyes and +big ears cut out of cambric and lined with one thickness of paper. +Attach strings at A and tie to the first crosspiece of the rack. Pad +the rack with an old comfort sewed fast with cord to hold it in place. + +[Illustration: Fig. 6] + +Set the rack on the boy's shoulders, then standing with heads bent +forward, the foremost boy supporting the elephant's head with his head +and slipping his right hand into the upper part of the trunk so as to +swing it. Throw over them a large, dark-colored shawl, reaching to +their knees, fasten it together in the back and pin on a tail made of +cambric and stuffed. Legs covered with brown burlap. + + + + +A CHRISTMAS CAROL OR THE MISER'S YULETIDE DREAM + +[Illustration: + +SCROOGE BOB CRATCHIT MARLEY'S GHOST SECOND SPIRIT + +THIRD SPIRIT WAIT MISSION LASS FRED FIRST SPIRIT + + COSTUME OF +MRS. FEZZIWIG FEZZIWIG BELLA EBENEZER & DICK FIDDLER + +PETER, BETTY, +BELINDA and MRS. CRATCHIT MARTHA BOB TINY TIM + +THE CRATCHIT FAMILY] + + + + +A CHRISTMAS CAROL OR THE MISER'S YULETIDE DREAM + +ADAPTED FROM CHARLES DICKENS' IMMORTAL STORY. + + +CHARACTERS. + +EBENEZER SCROOGE _A Middle-aged Merchant_ +"Hard and sharp as flint, from which no steel had ever struck +out generous fire." + +BOB CRATCHIT _Scrooge's Clerk_ +"With the Christmas spirit in his heart." + +FRED _Scrooge's Nephew_ +"A whole-souled, merry-hearted young married man." + +TWO MISSION LASSIES + +THE GHOST OF JACOB MARLEY _Scrooge's Partner_ +"Dead these seven years." + +FIRST SPIRIT (Little Girl) _The Ghost of Christmas Past_ + +SECOND SPIRIT _The Ghost of Christmas Present_ + +THIRD SPIRIT _The Ghost of Christmas Yet to Be_ + +A CHORUS OF YOUNG BOYS _Carol Singers_ + +FIRST WAIT _The Leader of the Singers_ + +MR. FEZZIWIG _A Jolly Old Merchant_ + +MRS. FEZZIWIG _One Vast Substantial Smile_ + +EBENEZER _Scrooge as a Young Man_ + +DICK _His Fellow Clerk_ + +THE OLD FIDDLER + +BELLA _Scrooge's First and Only Love_ + +MRS. CRATCHIT _Bob's Wife_ + +BELINDA, _Aged Eighteen_ } +MARTHA, _Aged Seventeen_ } +PETER, _Aged Fourteen_ } +BOB, _Aged Eleven_ } _Bob Cratchit's Family_ +BETTY, _Aged Nine_ } +TINY TIM, _Aged Four_ } + +_Five Ladies, Five Gentlemen and a Little Boy for the Fezziwig Tableau_ + + +STAVE I. + +SCENE: _The counting house of_ SCROOGE _and_ MARLEY. _A dark, dreary +office, indicated by brown curtains at sides, with entrances R. and L. +and brown curtains at rear. Note: These rear curtains must be arranged +to be parted, showing the tableau stage back of the real stage. The +tableau stage is elevated a few feet above the real stage (this makes +a better picture but is not absolutely necessary). High desk at R. +facing the R. wall. Tall stool at this desk; ledger, quill pen, ink, +candle on this desk. Small, old desk down L., facing audience. Desk +chair back of this desk. Two common wooden chairs at R.C. and L.C. +Ledger, quill pen, books, candle stuck in an old dark bottle, on desk +down L._ + +_Full description of costumes, a detailed illustration of the stage +setting, etc., will be found at the end of the play._ + +_Before the curtain rises_ WAITS _are heard singing off L. Curtain +rises disclosing_ BOB CRATCHIT _seated on stool, bent over ledger at +desk R., working by the light of the candle._ + +WAITS (_outside, sing "Christmas Carol"_). + +(CRATCHIT _turns and listens._) + +_Enter_ SCROOGE _from R. in a towering passion. Slams door R._ +CRATCHIT _hurriedly returns to his work._ SCROOGE _crosses to door L. +and flings it open angrily._ + + CHRISTMAS CAROL. + + J.M. NEALE. + THOMAS HELMORE. + +[Music illustration: + + 1. Christ was born on Christ-mas day, + Wreathe the hol-ly, twine the bay, + Light and life and joy is He, + The Babe, the Son, the Ho-ly One of Ma-ry. + + 2. He is born to set us free; + He is born our Lord to be; + Car-ol, Chris-tians, joy-ful-ly; + The God, the Lord, by all a-dored for-ev-er. + + 3. Let the bright red ber-ries glow + Ev-'ry-where in good-ly show, + Light and life and joy is He, + The Babe, the Son, the Ho-ly One of Ma-ry. + + Christian men, re-joice and sing; + 'Tis the birth-day of our King. + + Car-ol, Christians, joy-ful-ly; + The God, the Lord, + By all a-dored + For-ev-er. + Night of sadness, + Morn of glad-ness + Ev-er-more: + Ev-er, Ev-er, + Aft-er man-y troub-les sore, + Morn of glad-ness ev-er-more, and ev-er-more. + + Mid-night scarce-ly passed and o-ver, + Draw-ing to the ho-ly morn; + Ver-y ear-ly, Ver-y ear-ly, Christ was born. + Sing out with bliss, + His name is this: + Em-man-u-el! + As 'twas fore-told, + In days of old, + By Ga-bri-el.] + +SCROOGE (_flinging open door L. at this point_). Get away from my +door. Begone, ye beggars! I've nothing for you. + +FIRST WAIT (_sticking his head in door at L._). Only a shillin', sir, +for a merry Christmas, yer honor. + +SCROOGE. Get away from there or I'll call the police. + +FIRST WAIT. Only a shillin', sir. + +SCROOGE. Not a penny. I have other places to put my money. Go on, now. +You don't get a cent. Not a penny! + +FIRST WAIT. All right, sir. Merry Christmas, just the same, sir. +(_Exits L._) + +SCROOGE (_comes down to his desk at L., muttering_). Howling idiots! +Give 'em a shilling, hey? I'd like to give 'em six months in the +work'us, that I would. Paupers! I'd show 'em what a merry Christmas +is. (CRATCHIT _gets down from stool and starts to slink out L._) Hey! + +CRATCHIT (_pauses, turns to_ SCROOGE). Yes, sir. + +SCROOGE. Where you goin'? + +CRATCHIT. I was just goin' to get a few coals, sir. Just to warm us up +a bit, sir. + +SCROOGE. You let my coals alone. Get back to work. I'm not complaining +about the cold, am I? And I'm an older man than you are. Back to work! + +CRATCHIT (_sighs, pauses, then says meekly_). Yes, sir. (_Resumes +work._) + +SCROOGE. You want to let my coals alone if you expect to keep your +job. I'm not a millionaire. Understand? (_Loudly._) Understand? + +CRATCHIT. Yes, sir, I understand. (_Shivers, wraps long white woolen +muffler closer about throat and warms hands at candle._) + +SCROOGE. Here it is three o'clock, the middle of the afternoon, and +two candles burning. What more do you want? Want me to end up in the +poorhouse? + +FRED (_heard outside at L._). Uncle! Uncle! Where are you? Merry +Christmas, uncle. + +FRED _enters from L. He is happy and bright and has a cheerful, loud +laugh. He enters laughing and comes down C._ + +SCROOGE (_looking up from his work_). Oh, it's you, is it? + +FRED. Of course it is, uncle. Merry Christmas! God save you! + +SCROOGE (_with disgust_). Merry Christmas! Bah! Humbug! + +FRED. Christmas a humbug, uncle? You don't mean that, I'm sure. + +SCROOGE. I don't, hey? Merry Christmas! What cause have you got to be +merry? You're poor enough. + +FRED (_laughing good-naturedly_). Come, then, what right have you got +to be dismal? You're rich enough. So, merry Christmas, uncle. + +SCROOGE. Out upon your merry Christmas! What's Christmas time to you +but a time for paying bills without money; a time for finding yourself +a year older, but not an hour richer? You keep Christmas in your own +way and let me keep it in mine. + +FRED. Keep it? But you don't keep it! + +SCROOGE. Let me leave it alone, then. Much good may it do you! Much +good has it ever done you! + +FRED. Christmas is a good time, uncle; a kind, forgiving, charitable, +pleasant time; the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the +year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up +hearts freely, and to think of people below them in the social scale. +And therefore, uncle, though it has never put a scrap of gold or +silver in my pocket, I believe that it _has_ done me good, and _will_ +do me good; and I say, God bless it, God bless Christmas! + +CRATCHIT (_who had been listening eagerly, claps his hands_). Good! + +SCROOGE. Let me hear another sound from _you_ and you'll keep your +Christmas by losing your job. Get to work! + +CRATCHIT. Yes, sir. (_Resumes his work on the ledger._) + +SCROOGE (_to_ FRED). You're quite a powerful speaker, sir. I wonder +you don't go into Parliament. + +FRED. Don't be angry, uncle. Come, dine with us tomorrow. + +SCROOGE. Dine with you? Me? I'll see you hanged first. Dine with you? +I'll see you in-- + +CRATCHIT (_sneezes violently_). + +SCROOGE. What's the matter with _you_? (_Turns to_ FRED.) I'm a busy +man. Good afternoon. + +FRED. Come, uncle; say "Yes." + +SCROOGE. No. + +FRED. But why? Why? + +SCROOGE (_savagely_). Why did you get married? + +FRED. Because I fell in love. + +SCROOGE. Bah! (_Resumes his work._) Good afternoon. + +FRED. I want nothing from you. I ask nothing from you. But why can't +we be friends? + +SCROOGE. Good afternoon. + +FRED. Uncle I won't part in anger. My dear mother was your only +sister--your only relation. For her sake let us be friends. + +SCROOGE (_savagely_). Good afternoon. + +FRED. I'll still keep the Christmas spirit, uncle. A merry Christmas +to you. + +SCROOGE (_busy at ledger_). Bah! + +FRED. And a happy New Year. + +SCROOGE. Good afternoon! + +FRED (_goes to_ CRATCHIT). And a merry Christmas to you, Bob Cratchit. + +CRATCHIT (_getting down from stool, shaking hands with_ FRED +_warmly_). Merry Christmas, sir. God bless it! + +FRED. Ay, God bless it! And a happy New Year. + +CRATCHIT. And a happy New Year, too! God bless that, too! + +FRED. Ay, Bob, God bless that, too. (_Exit L._) + +SCROOGE. Cratchit, get to work! + +CRATCHIT. Yes, sir. (_Resumes work._) + +SCROOGE (_looks at him_). Humph! Fifteen shillings a week and a wife +and six children, and he talks about a merry Christmas. Humph! (_Works +on ledger._) + +_Enter from L._ TWO MISSION LASSIES. _They come down C._ + +FIRST LASS. Scrooge and Marley's, I believe? Have I the pleasure of +addressing Mr. Scrooge or Mr. Marley? + +SCROOGE. Mr. Marley has been dead these seven years. He died seven +years ago this very night. + +FIRST LASS. We have no doubt his liberality is represented by his +surviving partner. (_Shows subscription paper._) + +SCROOGE. Liberality? Humph! (_Returns paper to her._) + +SECOND LASS. At this festive season of the year, Mr. Scrooge, we are +trying to make some slight provision for the poor and destitute, who +are suffering greatly. Hundreds of thousands are in want of common +comforts, sir. + +SCROOGE. Are there no prisons? + +SECOND LASS (_sighs_). Plenty of prisons, sir. + +SCROOGE. And the workhouses--are they still in operation? + +FIRST LASS. They are, sir; but they scarcely furnish Christmas cheer +for mind and body. We are trying to raise a fund to buy the poor some +meat and drink and means of warmth. + +SECOND LASS. We chose this time because it is a time when want is +keenly felt and abundance rejoices. What shall we put you down for? + +SCROOGE. Nothing. + +FIRST LASS. You wish to be anonymous? + +SCROOGE. I wish to be left alone. I don't make merry myself at +Christmas, I don't believe in it. And I can't afford to make idle +people merry. They should go to the poorhouse. + +SECOND LASS. Many of them would rather die, sir, than do that. + +SCROOGE (_savagely_). If they would rather die, they'd better do it +and decrease the population. And besides, I am a very busy man. + +FIRST LASS. But, sir-- + +SCROOGE. Good afternoon. + +FIRST LASS. I'm sorry, sir. Sorry-- + +SCROOGE. Sorry for them? + +FIRST LASS. No, sir, I'm sorry for you, sir. Good afternoon. (_Exits +L. followed by_ SECOND LASS.) + +SCROOGE. Sorry for me, hey? (_Pause. He works. The clock strikes +five._) Sorry for me! + +CRATCHIT (_closes his book, blows out candle_). Is there anything +more, sir? (_Comes to C._) + +SCROOGE. You'll want all day off tomorrow, I suppose? + +CRATCHIT. If it's quite convenient, sir. + +SCROOGE. Well, it isn't--and it's not fair. If I'd dock you a half a +crown for it you'd think I was ill using you, wouldn't you? + +CRATCHIT (_nervously_). I don't know, sir. + +SCROOGE. And yet you expect me to pay a full day's wages for no work. + +CRATCHIT. It only comes once a year, sir. Only once a year. + +SCROOGE. A poor excuse for picking a man's pocket every twenty-fifth +of December! But I suppose you've got to have the whole day. But you +be here all the earlier next morning. + +CRATCHIT. Oh, yes, indeed, sir. (_Goes out R._) + +SCROOGE. I'll stay here a bit and finish up the work. + +_Enter_ CRATCHIT _from R. with hat. He turns up his coat collar, wraps +the long white woolen muffler around chin and pulls hat down over his +face._ + +CRATCHIT (_crosses to door L._). I'm going, sir. + +SCROOGE. All right. + +CRATCHIT (_shields face with arm as though he were afraid Scrooge +might throw something at him_). Merry Christmas, sir! (_Runs out L._) + +SCROOGE. Bah! Humbug! (_He works at ledger. Finally drops his head on +his arms and sleeps. The light of his candle goes out. Note: Scrooge +might blow it out unseen by audience._) + +_The stage is now in darkness. A musical bell tolls off L. After a +pause another bell tolls off R. The clinking of chains is heard. When +the stage is completely darkened the_ GHOST OF MARLEY _slips in and +sits at R. He is entirely covered with black, face and all, as he +slips in, so as to be quite invisible._ + +_Mysterious music. Sudden clap of thunder heard. An auto light from +the wings at R. is thrown on the_ GHOST'S _face. This light should be +green. The thunder dies away. Clanking of chains heard._ + +GHOST (_groans_). + +SCROOGE (_starts up, looks at Ghost, pauses_). How now! What do you +want with me? + +GHOST. Much. + +SCROOGE. Who are you? + +GHOST. Ask me who I was. + +SCROOGE. Well, who were you, then? + +GHOST. In life I was your partner, Jacob Marley. It is required of +every man that the spirit within him should walk abroad among his +fellow-men, and if that spirit goes not forth in life, it is condemned +to do so after death. + +SCROOGE. You are fettered. Tell me why. + +GHOST. I wear the chain I forged in life. I made it link by link, yard +by yard, the heavy chain of avarice. Now I must make amends for the +opportunities I neglected in life. + +SCROOGE. But you were always a good man of business, Jacob. + +GHOST. Business? Mankind should have been my business. Kind actions, +charity, mercy, benevolence, love--all should have been my business. I +am here tonight to warn you, to warn you, Ebenezer Scrooge, that you +have yet a chance of escaping my fate. + +SCROOGE. You were always a good friend to me. + +GHOST. You will be haunted by Three Spirits. + +SCROOGE. If it's all the same to you, I think I'd rather not. + +GHOST. Without their visits, you cannot hope to escape my fate. Expect +the first when the bell tolls one. + +SCROOGE. Couldn't I take it all at once and have it over, Jacob? + +GHOST. Remember my warning, heed the message and you may yet be saved. +My time is over. (_Chains rattle._) Farewell, farewell, farewell! +(_Loud crash of thunder. Light is quenched and_ GHOST _exits unseen by +audience._) + +_Pause. The bell tolls one. Enter_ SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST _from R. +She comes down R. Strong white light on her from R._ + +SCROOGE (_trembling_). Are you the Spirit whose coming was foretold to +me? + +FIRST SPIRIT. I am. + +SCROOGE. Who and what are you? + +FIRST SPIRIT. I am the Ghost of Christmas Past. + +SCROOGE. Long past? + +FIRST SPIRIT. No, your past. + +SCROOGE. Why have you come here to me? + +FIRST SPIRIT. For your own welfare. I must teach you the first lesson +of consideration. + +SCROOGE. But I _am_ considerate. + +FIRST SPIRIT. Are you a kind master to your clerk? + +SCROOGE. Well, I'm not unkind. + +FIRST SPIRIT. Do you remember your own first master? One Fezziwig by +name? + +SCROOGE. Indeed, I do. Bless his dear, old heart. He was the kindest +master that ever lived. + +FIRST SPIRIT. Then why haven't you followed his good example? Would +any of your clerks say that you were the kindest master that ever +lived? + +SCROOGE. Well, times have changed, that's it--it's all the fault of +the times. + +FIRST SPIRIT. It's all the fault of a squeezing, wrenching, grasping, +scraping, clutching, covetous old sinner! Hard and sharp as flint, +from which no steel has ever struck out a generous fire. No wind that +blows is more bitter than he, no falling snow is more intent upon its +purpose, no pelting rain less open to entreaty. And his name is +Ebenezer Scrooge. + +SCROOGE. All I ask is to edge my way along the crowded path of life. I +want to be left alone. That's all--left alone. + +FIRST SPIRIT. I have come to save you, Ebenezer Scrooge. I have come +to kindle into life the stone that once was your heart. First I will +show you the kind heart and generosity of your old time master. Behold +the warehouse of Fezziwig and Company. + +(_Rear curtains are drawn apart, revealing a workshop, with desk down +R. facing front. Barrel up L. Sign on rear wall reads, "Fezziwig and +Company." Two young men_, EBENEZER _and_ DICK, _discovered happily +working at desk. Fezziwig stands up L. looking off L._ WAITS _are +heard singing off L. at rear._) + +WAITS (_sing, music page 169_). + + Christ was born on Christmas Day, + Wreathe the holly, twine the bay, + Light and Life and Joy is He, + The Babe, the Son, + The Holy One + Of Mary. + +FEZZIWIG (_flinging them a handful of coins_). That's right, my lads. +Sing away. Merry Christmas to you. + +WAITS (_outside_). Thank ye, sir. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! +Thank ye, sir. (_They sing and the song dies away in the distance._) + +SCROOGE (_down R. with_ FIRST SPIRIT). Why, it's old Fezziwig. Bless +his dear, old heart. It's Fezziwig alive again. + +FEZZIWIG (_comes merrily down C._). Yo ho, my boys! No more work for +tonight. Christmas Eve, Dick! (_Throws his arms over the shoulders of +the two boys._) Christmas Eve, Ebenezer! God bless Christmas. + +DICK. Ay, ay, sir. + +EBENEZER. Ay, ay; God bless Christmas. + +FIRST SPIRIT. Did you hear that, Scrooge? That is yourself--and you +said God bless Christmas. + +SCROOGE. That's true. That was thirty years ago. + +FEZZIWIG (_bustling about_). The missis and the girls are down stairs, +so let's clear away before you can say Jack Robinson. (_They push desk +back, and decorate rear stage with strings of Christmas greens_, +FEZZIWIG _talking all the time._) Yo ho! That's right, Dick. String +the Christmas greens. Here you are, Ebenezer. We're going to have the +merriest time in all the kingdom. (_Dancing a step or two._) I'll +show ye how to enjoy life. That's it. Now we're all ready. (_Sings._) +"Wreathe the holly, twine the bay!" Let's have lots of room. Clear +away, Dick. Here comes the fiddler now. + +_Enter_ OLD FIDDLER. _He sits on barrel at rear and starts to "tune +up."_ + +OLD FIDDLER. Merry Christmas, sir. + +FEZZIWIG. The same to you, granfer, and many of 'em. + +_Enter_ MRS. FEZZIWIG _from L._ + +MRS. FEZZIWIG. Lawsy, lawsy, I thought we'd be late. (_Goes to the two +boys and puts her arms over their shoulders._) And how's my merry boys +tonight? + +DICK. Finer'n a fiddle. + +EBENEZER. Merry Christmas, Mrs. Fezziwig. + +MRS. FEZZIWIG. The same to you, dear lads. + +FEZZIWIG. Where's the girls, mother? + +MRS. FEZZIWIG. Here they come, Flora, Felicity and little Fanny May. + +_Enter the_ THREE FEZZIWIG _girls with their escorts. Everybody +bustles around shaking hands, wishing each other "Merry Christmas."_ + +FEZZIWIG. And here's the housemaid and her cousin the baker. (_They +enter and are greeted by all._) The cook and the milkman, and the +lonesome little boy from over the way! And Ebenezer's young lady, Miss +Bella. (_They enter and are merrily greeted._) And now, mother, what +do you say to a rollicking game of Puss in the Corner. + +(_They play Puss in the Corner with much loud laughter, clapping +hands, running about, etc. The_ FIDDLER _plays._) + +MRS. FEZZIWIG. Oh, I never was so happy in all my life. This is the +real spirit of Christmas. + +FEZZIWIG (_hangs up a bit of mistletoe_). And here's the mistletoe. + +(_They form a ring and play a ring game with much noise and +confusion._) + +EBENEZER (_catching_ MRS. FEZZIWIG _under the mistletoe_). I've got +ye! (_Kisses her._) + +MRS. FEZZIWIG. God bless the boy! + +EBENEZER. And God bless the merry Christmas! + +FEZZIWIG. And now a dance, my hearties. Yo ho! For the old time +Christmas dance. + +(_They dance a few figures of Sir Roger de Coverly or the Virginia +Reel. All are dancing wildly, swinging, etc., with plenty of loud +laughter, clapping of hands, etc., as the rear curtains are drawn. +Note: Use brilliant lights from R. and L. upon the rear stage._) + +FIRST SPIRIT. What a small matter to make these silly folks so full of +gratitude and happiness. + +SCROOGE (_astonished_). Small? It was the happiest time in my life. + +FIRST SPIRIT. And yet your master only spent a few pounds of your +mortal money. Three or four, perhaps. And yet he kindled the true +spirit of Christmas in all your hearts. + +SCROOGE. He could have made us miserable, but he made every day we +worked for him seem like Christmas. + +FIRST SPIRIT (_gazes steadily at Scrooge, who becomes uneasy under the +look_). What's the matter now? + +SCROOGE (_trying to appear unconcerned, but failing_). Oh, nothing! + +FIRST SPIRIT (_gazing at him_). Something, I think. + +SCROOGE. No, nothing; only this, I wish I could say a word or two to +my clerk just now. That's all. Poor fellow. I'm afraid I've been a +little hard on him. Poor Bob Cratchit! + +FIRST SPIRIT. My work is thriving, but my time grows short. Quick, I +have another picture for you. + +_Soft music. The curtains part, showing the scene as before, but only_ +EBENEZER _and_ BELLA _are discovered. Soft music plays all through +this scene._ + +BELLA. It matters little to you, very little. Another idol has +displaced me, that's all. If it can comfort you and cheer you in time +to come, as I would have tried to do, I have no just cause to grieve. + +EBENEZER (_irritated_). What idol has displaced you in my heart? + +BELLA. An idol of gold. + +EBENEZER. Well, I must make money. You know that. Poverty is the +hardest thing in the world. + +BELLA. I have seen your nobler instincts fall off one by one. Now +nothing remains in your heart but the love of gold. Therefore, I am +releasing you from your engagement. (_Offers ring._) + +EBENEZER. Have I ever sought release? + +BELLA. In words, no; but in everything else, yes. I am penniless. If +you married me, you would probably regret it. So I release you with a +heart full of love for the noble man you once were. + +EBENEZER. But, Bella-- + +BELLA. You will soon forget me. Your time and your mind will be full +of business, seeking after gold. The idol of gold has driven love +from your heart, but may you be happy and contented in the life you +have chosen. (_Rear curtains are drawn._) + +FIRST SPIRIT. And are you happy and content in the life you have +chosen, Ebenezer Scrooge? + +SCROOGE. No, a thousand times--no. I threw away her love, the one pure +thing in my life, for gold. And now I'm alone, alone. (_Sinks at desk +and sobs._) + +FIRST SPIRIT. I have shown shadows of times that are passed. Have you +learned a lesson from the Spirit of Christmas Past? + +SCROOGE. I have, I have; a bitter, bitter lesson. + +FIRST SPIRIT. And will you see more? + +SCROOGE. No, no. Show me no more. Torture me no longer. + +FIRST SPIRIT. Remember the lesson you have learned. Remember the +kindness of your old master. Remember the love of your old sweetheart. +Your life is barren and bitter, but there is yet time for repentance. +(_Bell tolls twice._) The signal! My hour is past. On the stroke of +six my brother, the Spirit of the Christmas Present, will visit you. +Remember! Repent! Believe! Farewell, farewell, farewell! + +FRONT CURTAIN SLOWLY FALLS. + + +STAVE II. + +_Same scene as Stave I. Lights half up, but candles are not burning. +Rear curtains closed._ SCROOGE _is discovered asleep at his desk. The_ +SPIRIT _of_ CHRISTMAS PRESENT _sits at R., a red light shining on him. +He carries a torch in which a red light burns. The bells toll six +times._ SCROOGE _suddenly awakens and gazes at_ SECOND SPIRIT. + +SECOND SPIRIT. Arise, arise, Ebenezer Scrooge, and learn to know me +better. + +SCROOGE (_frightened_). I don't believe I ever met you before. + +SECOND SPIRIT. Probably not. I am the Spirit of Christmas. The Ghost +of Christmas Present. + +SCROOGE. The Ghost of Christmas Present? + +SECOND SPIRIT. I am a brother of the little Spirit of Christmas Past +who visited you before. + +SCROOGE. And are you going to show me all my past misdeeds? + +SECOND SPIRIT. Not me. I am going to show you your present misdeeds. +It is my mission to show you the love and comradeship of Christmas of +today. I travel among the common people. My torch is their +benediction. If there is a slight quarrel or any misunderstandings on +Christmas Day, I simply throw on them the light of my torch. And then +they say it is a shame to quarrel on Christmas Day--the Day of Peace +and Love. And so it is! God bless it! God bless Christmas Day! + +SCROOGE. And what do you intend to show me? + +SECOND SPIRIT. I intend to show you the House of Happiness. + +SCROOGE. Is it a wonderful palace of gold? + +SECOND SPIRIT. It is a humble little kitchen. In fact, the kitchen of +your poor clerk, Bob Cratchit. Bob, with his fifteen shillings a +week--with his wife and six children--with his shabby clothes and his +humble, shabby manners--Bob, with his little four-roomed house, and +his struggle to keep the wolf from the door. The Ghost of the +Christmas Present blesses his abode. Behold! + +_Bright, cheerful music._ SCROOGE _and_ SECOND SPIRIT _cross to R. The +rear curtains open, showing the interior of the Cratchit kitchen. +Everything neat, but showing extreme poverty. Fireplace C. rear. +Kettle boiling on crane. Table down L.C. with red cloth and lighted +lamp. Cupboard up R. Old chairs around stage. Several pots of bright +flowers in evidence. A bird in a cage is singing over the mantel._ +PETER _discovered watching the potatoes boiling in the kettle at the +fireplace. Enter_ MRS. CRATCHIT _and_ BELINDA _from L._ + +MRS. CRATCHIT. Hurry, Belinda; we must set the table right away. How's +the taters, Peter? + +PETER (_peeks in the kettle_). Boiling, mammy, boiling. + +MRS. CRATCHIT. Here, carry the lamp over there. + +BELINDA. Yes, ma'am. (_Puts lamp on cupboard._) + +MRS. CRATCHIT. And now where's the white table cloth? + +BELINDA (_getting it from cupboard_). Here it is, mammy. (_They place +castor, plates, knives, etc., on table during the following scene._) + +MRS. CRATCHIT. Whatever has got your precious father, I wonder? He and +Tiny Tim's been at the church these three hours. + +_Enter_ BOB _and_ BETTY _from R. They run down and kiss_ MRS. +CRATCHIT. + +BOB. Oh, mumsy, we saw the goose, we did. We peeked in through the +bakery window and we saw the goose, we did. + +BETTY. And we smelled him, too. And we went inside, we did. And the +baker asked us what was wantin'. And Bob said he wanted to know which +goose was the Cratchit goose. + +BOB. And he pointed to the very biggest one, mumsy. Didn't he, Betty? + +BETTY. And it was all nice and browny on top. And he said it 'ud be +ready in 'bout twenty minutes. Didn't he, Bob? + +BOB. And it was the best looking goose I ever saw, it was. It just +made me hungry to see him and to smell him baking. + +BETTY. And it had sage and onion stuffing, mumsy, didn't it, Bob? + +MRS. CRATCHIT. I'm sure there never was such a goose before, and I'm +sure there never will be such a goose again. How's the 'taters, Peter? + +PETER (_looks in kettle_). Boilin', mammy, boilin'. + +BOB. Oh, Peter's got on pa's shirt collar, he has. Peter's got on pa's +shirt collar. + +PETER. If I didn't have to mind these 'taters, I'd show you! + +MRS. CRATCHIT. I can't think what's keeping your father, and your +brother Tiny Tim. And Martha wasn't as late last Christmas Day by half +an hour. + +_Enter_ MARTHA _from R._ + +MARTHA. Here's Martha, mumsy. + +BOB (_dragging her down to Mrs. Cratchit_). Here's Martha, mumsy. + +BETTY. Oh, Martha, there's such a goose! Isn't there, Bob? + +MRS. CRATCHIT (_hugging and kissing_ MARTHA). Why, bless your heart +alive, my dear, how late you are! (_Takes off her bonnet and shawl._) + +MARTHA. We'd a deal of work to finish up last night. I was on my feet +all day. Oh, why won't people learn to do their Christmas shopping +early. If they'd only stop to give a moment's thought to the poor +clerks. + +MRS. CRATCHIT. There, there, my dear, sit ye down. Here's the big +chair, Martha. (BOB _has been sitting in the big chair at R., but_ +MRS. CRATCHIT _simply turns it forward, letting_ BOB _slip to the +floor, and seats_ MARTHA _therein._) Well, never mind, as long as +you're home at last, Martha. Draw your chair up to the fire and have a +warm. God bless you. How's the 'taters, Pete? + +PETER (_looking in kettle_). Boilin', mammy, boilin'. + +MARTHA (_sitting in front of the fire_). Oh, mumsy, ain't this +Heavenly? Be it ever so humble there's no place like home. + +BETTY (_at door R._). Father's coming, father's coming. + +BOB. Hide yourself, Martha. Here, here. (_Pulls her to L._) + +BETTY (_helping her_). Hurry up. Hide, hide! (_Exit_ MARTHA _at L._) + +_Bright music. Enter_ CRATCHIT _carrying_ TINY TIM _on his shoulder._ +TINY TIM _carries a little crutch._ + +CRATCHIT (_down C._). Why, where's our Martha? + +MRS. CRATCHIT (_down L._). Not coming. + +CRATCHIT. Not coming? Not coming--on Christmas Day? + +MARTHA (_rushing in from L._). No, father, it's only a joke. Here I +am, father, here I am. (_Rushes into his arms._) + +BETTY (_taking Tiny Tim_). Come on, Tiny Tim, out to the wash-house. +We've got something to show you, we have. Ain't we, Bob? + +BOB. You bet we have, Tiny Tim. Come and hear the Christmas pudding +singing in the wash boiler. Come on! (_Exit_ BOB, _followed by_ BETTY +_and_ TINY TIM, _at L._) + +MRS. CRATCHIT (_taking Cratchit's hat and muffler and hanging them +up_). And how did Tiny Tim behave in the church, father? + +CRATCHIT. As good as gold and better. Somehow he gets thoughtful, +sitting by himself so much, and thinks the strangest things you ever +heard. (_Sits at L. surrounded by all._) He told me, coming home, that +he hoped the people saw him in the church, because he was a cripple, +and it might be pleasant to them to remember upon Christmas Day, who +it was who made lame beggars walk and blind men see. (_Trembling +voice._) Little Tim is growing stronger and more hearty every day. + +_Enter_ TINY TIM _from L._ + +TIM. I heard the pudding singing a song in the wash boiler, I did. + +MRS. CRATCHIT. Everything is ready. Bob, you and Betty run across the +street to the baker's and fetch the goose. + +BOB. Come on, Betty. (_Runs out R. with_ BETTY.) + +MRS. CRATCHIT. I've got the gravy to heat, right away. Peter, mash the +potatoes. Belinda, sweeten up the apple sauce! Martha, the hot plates! +(_All bustle around, setting table._ CRATCHIT _with_ TIM, _on his +knee, sit before the fire._) + +BELINDA. We haven't got enough chairs, mumsy. + +CRATCHIT. This young shaver can sit on my knee. + +MRS. CRATCHIT. Peter, set up the chairs. + +_Enter_ BOB _and_ BETTY _from R. bearing a roast goose in a baking +pan._ + +BOB. Here it is, mumsy. + +BETTY. Here's the goose. (MRS. CRATCHIT _puts it on plate on table._) + +BELINDA. What a wonderful goose. + +MARTHA. And how big it is! (_All take seats._) + +BOB. And don't it smell good! + +BETTY. Hurray for the Christmas goose. + +TIM. Hurray! (CRATCHIT _makes signal, all bend heads for a silent +grace._) + +CRATCHIT (_after pronounced pause_). And God bless Christmas Day. + +TIM. God bless us all, every one. (CRATCHIT _and_ MRS. CRATCHIT _serve +the meal. All eat._) + +CRATCHIT. I've got a situation in my eye for Master Peter. + +PETER. A situation for me? + +CRATCHIT. Yes, sir, for you. Full five-and-sixpence weekly. + +ALL. Oh, Peter! + +BOB. Peter will be a man of business, won't you, Peter? + +PETER. What'll I do with all that money? + +CRATCHIT. Invest it, invest it, my lad. It's a bewildering income. + +MARTHA. Who do you think was in the shop yesterday? You'll never +guess. A countess and a real lord. + +ALL. Martha! + +MARTHA. A real, live lord, as fine as silk and just about as tall as +Peter here. + +PETER (_pulls his collar up high and tosses his head_). As big as me? +(WAITS _outside sing two verses of Christmas Carol, as before._) + +CRATCHIT (_goes to door_). Here's a sixpence for you, and God bless +you all. + +WAITS (_outside_). Thankee, sir. Merry Christmas, sir. + +BELINDA. And now the pudding. + +BETTY. Oh, suppose it should break in turning it out. + +MARTHA. Or suppose it isn't done enough. + +BOB. Suppose somebody should have got over the wall of the backyard +and stolen it while we were in here eating the goose. + +MRS. CRATCHIT. Nonsense. I'll get the Christmas pudding. (_Exits._) + +BOB (_very much excited_). Oh, I can smell it, I can. I smell the +pudding. + +_Enter_ MRS. CRATCHIT _bearing dish of pudding, decked with holly, and +blazing._ + +CRATCHIT. Oh, it's a wonder, mother, it's a wonder. + +BETTY. It looks like a little speckled cannon-ball. + +BOB. But just wait till you taste it; that's all. (_It is served._) + +CRATCHIT (_rises_). I have a toast. Mr. Scrooge! I'll give you Mr. +Scrooge, the founder of the feast. + +MRS. CRATCHIT (_indignantly_). The founder of the feast indeed! I +wish I had him here. I'd give him a piece of my mind to feast upon, +and I hope he'd have a good appetite for it. + +CRATCHIT (_remonstrating gently_). My dear, the children! Christmas +Day. + +MRS. CRATCHIT. He's an odious, stingy, hard, unfeeling man. You know +he is, Robert. Nobody knows it better than you do. + +CRATCHIT (_mildly_). My dear, Christmas Day! + +MRS. CRATCHIT. Then I'll drink his health, for your sake and the +Day's, not for his. Long life to him! A Merry Christmas and a Happy +New Year! He'll be very merry and happy, I've no doubt. + +CRATCHIT. And now a Merry Christmas to us all, my dears. God bless us. + +ALL (_rising_). A very Merry Christmas. + +TIM. And God bless us every one! + +(_The tableau curtains are slowly drawn._) + +SCROOGE. Spirit, tell me if Tiny Tim will live. + +SECOND SPIRIT. I see a vacant seat in the poor chimney-corner, and a +little crutch without an owner. If these shadows remained unaltered by +the future, the child will die. + +SCROOGE. No, no, kind Spirit! Say he will be spared. + +SECOND SPIRIT. If he be like to die, he had better do it, and decrease +the surplus population. Your very words, Scrooge. Decrease the surplus +population. (SCROOGE _hangs his head in shame._) Man, if man you be in +heart, forbear that wicked cant. Will you decide what men shall live, +and what men shall die? It may be that in the sight of Heaven you are +more worthless and less fit to live than millions like this poor man's +child. + +SCROOGE. Forgive me, forgive me. + +SECOND SPIRIT. You have seen the spirit of Christmas bless this poor +dwelling. They were not a handsome family, they were not well dressed; +their clothes were scanty and their shoes far from being +water-proof--but they were happy, grateful, pleased with one another, +and contented with the Christmas time. They are my children. Have you +learned your lesson? (_Chimes ring._) My hour is spent. + +SCROOGE. I have learned the lesson, Spirit of Christmas. I have seen +happiness, in spite of poverty. A happiness that all my gold cannot +buy. I have seen the Christmas spirit. Forgive me that I ever dared to +utter a word against Christmas. Forgive me! Forgive me! (_The chimes +continue ringing, the_ SPIRIT _glides out._ SCROOGE _kneels in prayer, +muttering, "Forgive me! Forgive me!"_) + +CURTAIN. + + +STAVE III. + +_Same scene as before, the rear curtains drawn together._ SCROOGE _is +discovered seated at his desk, his head buried in his hands. The_ +THIRD SPIRIT _stands at C. with green, ghastly light on him from R. +This is the only light on the stage. The bells toll six._ + +SCROOGE (_awakens_). I am in the presence of the Ghost of Christmas +Yet to Come. + +THIRD SPIRIT (_inclines head_). + +SCROOGE. You are going to show me the shadows of things that are to +happen in the future? + +THIRD SPIRIT (_inclines head_). + +SCROOGE. I fear you more than any I have yet seen. But I know you are +working for my welfare, so I will see your visions with a thankful +heart. Will you not speak to me? + +THIRD SPIRIT (_points downward with R. hand_). + +SCROOGE. No word for me. Well, have you anything to show me? + +THIRD SPIRIT (_points to rear stage. The curtains part. Rear stage is +draped in white sheets, with bare trees at R. and L. A grave with +carved headstone is at C. Blue lights on this scene. Snow falls. Bells +heard tolling in the distance._) + +SCROOGE. A churchyard! + +THIRD SPIRIT (_goes to rear stage, points to tombstone._) + +SCROOGE. Before I draw nearer to that stone to which you point, answer +me one question. Are these the shadows of the things that Will be, or +are they the shadows of things that May be, only? + +THIRD SPIRIT (_points to stone_). + +SCROOGE (_creeps tremblingly toward it, moving very slowly, bends +over, reads the name, screams_). Ebenezer Scrooge! My tombstone, my +grave! No, Spirit, no, no! (_Rushes to desk, sinks in chair._) I am +not the man I was. I am not past all hope. I will honor Christmas in +my heart, and try to keep it all the year. Save me, save me! + +(_The rear curtains are slowly closed_) + +SCROOGE (_rising_). I will keep Christmas in the past, the present and +the future. The spirits of all three shall strive within me. Heaven be +praised for this Christmas warning. (_Laughing._) I don't know what to +do. I'm as light as a feather, I'm as happy as an angel, I'm as merry +as a schoolboy. A Merry Christmas to everybody. A happy New Year to +all the world. Hip, hurrah! + +(_Christmas chimes heard outside. Waits singing in the distance._) + +WAITS (_singing louder, music, page 169_): + + Christ was born on Christmas Day, + Wreathe the holly, twine the bay, + Light and Life and Joy is He, + The Babe, the Son, + The Holy One + Of Mary. + +SCROOGE (_rushes to the door_). Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas. God +bless ye! (_Flings them a handful of coins._) + +FIRST WAIT. Thankee, sir. + +SCROOGE (_grabs him and brings him down C._). What day is this, my +merry lad? + +WAIT. Hey? + +SCROOGE. What day is this my lad? + +WAIT (_loudly_). Today! Why, Christmas Day! + +SCROOGE. Do you know the grocer's in the next street? + +WAIT. I should hope I did. + +SCROOGE. Do you know whether they've sold the prize turkey that was +hanging up there? Not the little prize turkey, the big prize turkey? + +WAIT. What, the one as big as me? + +SCROOGE. Yes, my buck. + +WAIT. It's hanging there now. + +SCROOGE. Is it? Go and buy it. + +WAIT. Aw, go on! + +SCROOGE. No, no; I'm in earnest. Go and buy it and tell 'em to bring +it here, that I may tell 'em where to take it. Come back with the man, +and I'll give you a shilling. Come back with him in less than five +minutes, and I'll give you half-a-crown. + +WAIT. Watch me. (_Rushes out._) + +SCROOGE. What a fine little fellow. See him run. I'll send the turkey +to Bob Cratchit's. He shan't know who sends it. It's twice the size of +Tiny Tim. He should be here by now. + +_Enter_ CRATCHIT _from R._ + +CRATCHIT. Morning, sir. (_Takes off cap and muffler, goes to desk, +starts to work._) + +SCROOGE (_at desk_). What do you mean by coming here at this time of +day? + +CRATCHIT. I'm very sorry, sir. Very, very sorry. + +SCROOGE. Sorry? (_Sarcastically._) Yes, you are! Come here! Come here +at once! Understand! + +CRATCHIT (_comes to Scrooge's desk_). If you please, sir-- + +SCROOGE. I'm not going to stand this sort of thing any longer. And +therefore (_rises, dances toward_ CRATCHIT, _digs him in ribs_), and +therefore I am about to raise your salary. + +CRATCHIT. Heavens! The master has gone plumb crazy. + +SCROOGE. I'm going to help you and your family. I'm going to be a +Godfather to all of 'em. The two girls and Master Peter, Bob, Betty +and to dear Tiny Tim. Home to your family, now. Home to them, Bob +Cratchit--and merry Christmas to you and yours. God bless you. + +_Enter_ FRED _from R._ + +FRED. Here I am again, uncle. Merry Christmas. + +SCROOGE (_rushes to him and shakes his hands heartily_). And the same +to you, my lad, and many of 'em. I'm going to eat Christmas dinner +with you this day. I'm going to honor Christmas in my heart, and keep +it every day in the year. I will live in the past, the present and the +future. The spirits of all three shall strive within me. (_Stands C._, +FRED _on his R._, CRATCHIT _on his L. He takes their hands._) Merry +Christmas, boys, and God bless us! + +FRED _and_ CRATCHIT. The same to you, sir. God bless us. + +(_Rear curtains are drawn back, showing the Cratchit family at the +table._ TINY TIM _stands on table._) + +TIM. God bless us everyone! + +(_All unite in singing Christmas Carol to--_) + +SLOW CURTAIN. + + +THE SCENERY. + +[Illustration] + +TABLEAUX ON REAR STAGE. + +No. 1. A room. Barrel up L. for fiddler. Desk at R. Sign on wall +"Fezziwig and Company." Garlands of green. + +No. 2. Ebenezer and Bella. Same scene as No. 1. + +No. 3. Cratchit's kitchen. Table at C. and home-made fireplace at rear +C. are the only essentials, with a few stools or chairs. Fireplace +made of a few boards covered with red paper marked like bricks with +white chalk or paint. + +No. 4. White sheets hang at back and sides. Two small evergreen trees +nailed in position, white cotton hanging from them. Grave at C. +covered with snow. Wooden headstone painted white and small footstone. +The headstone may be in the form of a cross or a slab. + + +COSTUMES. + +SCROOGE--Should be played by a thin man of middle age, if possible. +Gray hair. Shabby dark suit. Face lined. No jewelry or colors. If +desired to costume the play in the middle Victorian period, Scrooge +should wear very tight dark trousers, brown low cut vest, shabby black +full-dress coat, soft white shirt, black stock tie, high collar made +by taking an ordinary turn-over collar and turning it up. + +BOB CRATCHIT--Very shabby dark suit. Long white woolen muffler. Old +cap. Suit should be the same style as that worn by Scrooge, but much +shabbier. Clothing neatly patched. He wears a sprig of mistletoe or +holly in Staves 1 and 2. + +FRED--Bright, cheerful young man of 22. Overcoat and top hat. Ruffled +shirt, stock tie and collar as for Scrooge. + +MISSION LASSIES--Dark skirts, capes, blue poke bonnets with red ribbon +across front. + +THE GHOST OF JACOB MARLEY--Long black robe. Black hood. Chains around +waist, with toy money banks on chains. Take a skeleton false face and +with gray and black and white grease paint make up your own face like +a false face. Or if desired, wear the false face. Speak in low +monotone. + +FIRST SPIRIT--A little girl of 10. Long light hair. White Grecian +draperies trimmed with tinsel. Crown of tinsel. + +SECOND SPIRIT--Man dressed in a red robe, trimmed with sprigs of green +pine. White cotton border to represent snow. Cap of white cotton. + +THIRD SPIRIT--Use same costume and make-up as Marley's Ghost. + +WAITS--White smocks, ragged trousers. Felt hats twined with red and +green ribbon. Carry branches of holly. + +MR. FEZZIWIG--Low shoes with pasteboard buckles covered with tinfoil. +Short black trousers. White stockings. Fancy colonial coat and hat. +White colonial wig. A short, stout man of middle age. Always laughing, +moving around, etc. + +MRS. FEZZIWIG--Middle-aged lady in gay colonial tuck-up dress. White +colonial wig. + +EBENEZER and DICK--Two young men in colonial costume. No wigs. + +THE FIDDLER--White wig and whiskers. Long white smock. Hat trimmed +with ribbons. + +BELLA--Neat colonial costume of pink and white. Hair in curls. + +THE CRATCHIT FAMILY--Old-fashioned costumes, faded and worn, but +bright with cheap lace and gay ribbons. Peter wears a large white +collar. + + + + +HER CHRISTMAS HAT + +[Illustration: + +WARREN WILLIAMS KITTY, HIS WIFE MISS MINERVA MOCKRIDGE + +MAGINNIS GOOGIN EDDIE MRS HONORIA GOOGIN + +MRS LAURA LACEY HOGAN HARD TIMES ANNIE] + + + + +HER CHRISTMAS HAT + +A FARCE IN ONE ACT. + + +CHARACTERS. + +WARREN WILLIAMS _A Young Architect_ +KITTY _His Wife_ +MISS MINERVA MOCKRIDGE _From Kankakee_ +MAGINNIS GOOGIN _The Janitor of the Apartment_ +MRS. HONORIA GOOGIN _His Wife_ +EDDIE _The Elevator Boy_ +MRS. LAURA LACEY _Kitty's Chum_ +HOGAN _A Policeman_ +HARD TIMES ANNIE _A Beggar_ + + * * * * * + +TIME OF PLAYING--_About Forty-five Minutes._ + + * * * * * + +SCENE: _Living room in an apartment house. Furnishings as desired. +Several Christmas wreaths adorn the room._ KITTY _is discovered +comfortably seated down L. reading a fashion magazine. The door bell +at R. rings._ + +KITTY. Come in. + +_Enter_ EDDIE, _the colored elevator boy. He carries several Christmas +packages._ + +EDDIE. Yas'm, I'm in. + +KITTY. Eddie! + +EDDIE. Yas'm, it's me. I 'clare I's loaded up like a reg'lar old Santa +Claus. (_Laughs loudly._) Yas'm, I sure am. + +KITTY. Anything for us, Eddie? + +EDDIE. Two packages for you and one for Mr. Williams. Santa Claus is +sure liberal to you-all. + +KITTY (_taking the three packages_). Thank you, Eddie. + +EDDIE (_briskly_). I don't usually bring up de mail, Mis' Williams, +but this is Christmas Day and mos' everybody is anxious to git all +dat's comin' to 'em. I knows I is. + +KITTY. Have you had a merry Christmas, Eddie? + +EDDIE. No'm, not yet. All I got is a yaller and green striped necktie +from (_insert local name_). He's been wearin' it for more'n a year. + +KITTY (_has opened smaller package_). Oh, it's from Rannie Stewart. +(_Takes off tissue paper, disclosing a small bit of white embroidery +tied with a huge pink bow._) Mercy! Another pin-cushion cover. That +makes six I have already. Cost about twenty cents, and I sent her a +perfectly lovely doily embroidered with scarlet forget-me-nots. I'll +never send Rannie Stewart another present as long as I live. (_Throws +box and wrappings into waste basket._) Pink! And she knows my rooms +are in blue and yellow. Eddie! + +EDDIE. Yas'm. + +KITTY. Here's a little Christmas present for you. (_Hands it to him._) + +EDDIE (_reads card on it_). "Merry Christmas to my Darling Kittens." +Is dat for me? + +KITTY. Oh, no; not the card, just the embroidery. + +EDDIE (_holding it up_). Lawdy, Mis' Williams, what is dis yere? A +dust cap? + +KITTY. It's a cover for a pin-cushion. Isn't it a dear? + +EDDIE. I hopes you'll excuse me, but honest I hain't got no more use +for dat thing dan a pussy cat has for a hot water bottle. + +KITTY (_opening larger package_). Throw it in the waste basket, Eddie. +This is from Warren. I know the handwriting. It looks like a hat. +(_Opens box and removes wrappings, disclosing a hideous red and orange +hat._) Heavens, what a nightmare! Red and orange and a style four +years old. It must have come from the five and ten cent store. Look at +the plume! Oh! + +EDDIE (_admiring it_). Um-um, dat shore am a fine present. Your +husband certainly am a man ob taste, he shore am. + +KITTY (_sarcastically_). Yes, he has wonderful taste, hasn't he? A +little bizarre. No, it's more than bizarre; it's baroque. + +EDDIE. It looks like a hat to me. + +KITTY. I know what I'll do. (_Wraps it up and puts it back in box._) + +EDDIE. Dat certainly was a nice present, Mis' Williams. Must have cost +a heap of money. + +KITTY. It probably did. But it isn't my style. And Madame Brunot never +exchanges hats. What a shame! I suppose he paid an enormous price for +it and I could have satisfied myself with one for half the money. If +only men would allow their wives to select their own Christmas +presents. + +_Enter_ LAURA LACEY _from R._ + +LAURA. Hello, Kittens. I saw your door open and came right in. + +KITTY (_kisses her_). That's right, Lolly. I was just going over to +your apartment. I have a little present for you. + +LAURA. A present? You dear! (_Kisses her again._) + +KITTY. Yes. Here! (_Gives her the box containing the hat._) I hope +you'll like it. + +LAURA. A hat? Oh, you darling! (_Kisses her again._) + +WARREN (_outside L._). Kitty! + +KITTY (_goes to door at L._). Yes, Warren? + +WARREN. I can't find my collar button. + +KITTY. Did you look on the dresser? + +WARREN. Of course I did. I've looked every place except in the +refrigerator. + +KITTY. I'll be back in a minute, Laura. Excuse me. (_Hurries out L._) + +LAURA (_opens the box hastily and takes out the hat_). Red and orange! +Horrors! And I gave her a cut glass cold-cream jar that I got at the +auction. I wouldn't wear this to a dog fight. Eddie! + +EDDIE. Yas'm. + +LAURA. You've been a good boy to us all year. I'm going to give you a +lovely Christmas present. + +EDDIE. Is you? + +LAURA. I'm going to give you this duck of a hat. (_Holds it up._) + +EDDIE (_delighted_). Dat red and yaller hat? + +LAURA. Yes. Hurry and put it in the box. I don't want Kitty Williams +to know I gave her Christmas present away. (_They put it in box._) + +EDDIE. Um-um! Dat shore am some Christmas present. Won't ma lady-love +be delighted with all dat gorgeousness? I certainly am much obliged to +you, Mis' Lacey; I shore am. + +LAURA. When Kitty comes back tell her I was called to the 'phone. +(_Goes to door R._) I'll never give Kitty Williams another present as +long as I live. (_Exits R._) + +_Enter_ WARREN WILLIAMS _from L._ + +WARREN. Hello, Eddie. Are you acting as Santa Claus? + +EDDIE (_who has put the hat on floor at rear_). Yas, sah; yas, sah. +I's old Santa Claus to most everybody 'cept maself. Looks like old +Christmas done passed me by. + +WARREN (_sees package on table_). Hello, here's a present for me. + +EDDIE. Yas, sah. I brung it up. + +WARREN (_opens it_). Cigars! From my wife. (_Looks at box dubiously._) +She must have got them at a bargain sale. (_Reads cover._) Santas +Odoriferous. (_Passes box to Eddie._) Have a cigar, Eddie. + +EDDIE. Yas, sah. Thank you, boss. + +WARREN (_lighting one_). Now, that certainly is a sensible present. So +many women don't know how to select a cigar, but Kitty-- + +EDDIE (_smoking_). Yas, sah. Your wife certainly am a lady ob +discernibility. She shore am. + +WARREN. So many women give their husbands such foolish presents. + +EDDIE. De lady in Apartment B done give her husband a pearl La +Valliere for Christmas. + +WARREN (_takes cigar from mouth, looks at it a moment, replaces it and +smokes furiously_). You like a good cigar, don't you, Eddie? + +EDDIE (_removes his cigar, looks at it, replaces it_). Yas, sah. I +likes a _good_ cigar. + +WARREN. I tell you these are something like cigars, aren't they? + +EDDIE. Yas, sah. Dey's sumpin like 'em, boss, but not quite. + +WARREN (_chokes and then throws cigar in cuspidor_). I don't believe I +care to smoke just now. + +EDDIE (_does the same_). Neither does I, boss; neither does I. + +WARREN. You wouldn't like a nice box of cigars for a Christmas +present, would you, Eddie? + +EDDIE (_slowly_). No, sah, I don' 'spects I would. Ma lady-love don't +like to hab me smoke no cigars, kase she says it contaminates ma +presence. Well, I's got to go and deliber de res' ob my Christmas +packages. Merry Christmas, boss. (_Exit R., carrying the hat in the +box._) + +_Enter_ KITTY _from L._ + +KITTY. Warren, I've laid out the costumes in your room. They're too +lovely for anything. + +WARREN. Well, did you get it? + +KITTY. Get it? + +WARREN. Your Christmas present. + +KITTY. Oh, yes, I got it. (_Looks around._) Why, where is Lolly? + +WARREN. She probably got tired of waiting and went back to her +apartment. How did you like the hat? + +KITTY. It was a dream. You're such a good boy and you have the most +wonderful taste in the world. + +WARREN. Your cigars were just what I wanted. + +KITTY. Why aren't you smoking one? + +WARREN. I did. Just one. + +KITTY. Just one? + +WARREN (_hastily_). I mean--I only smoke one cigar in the afternoon, +you know. But where is your hat? + +KITTY. I'm going to have it fixed over a little, Warren. Just enough +to suit my own individuality, you know. + +WARREN. Jack Dawson gave his wife a cook stove. + +KITTY. Speaking of impossible presents, I just got the most horrible +pin-cushion cover from Rannie Stewart. I threw it in the waste basket. + +WARREN. That's what comes of promiscuous giving. I told you how it +would be. First I decided not to buy anything at all, but I couldn't +resist that hat. Your tickets to the masquerade dinner and ball are +the rest of the present. + +KITTY. But I told Lolly we'd take tickets from her. + +WARREN. I know. I haven't bought the tickets yet. I meant the money +for them was the rest of your present. That and the hat. All my +presents are beautiful practical things that every one wants. + +KITTY. Yes, that's so. You have wonderful taste. + +WARREN. I didn't even give Eddie anything. + +KITTY. It doesn't matter. Oh, Warren. (_Sits on arm of his chair._) +I'm so glad we're going to have tonight all to ourselves. Aunt Minerva +would have spoiled everything. + +WARREN. Is she so very awful? + +KITTY. Not awful; just good. Real downright good. And so intellectual. +I'm sure she'd never approve of a Christmas masquerade. + +(_Ring at the bell at R._) + +KITTY. See who it is. + +WARREN _admits_ MAGINNIS GOOGIN _from R._ + +GOOGIN. Merry Christmas, sor. + +WARREN. The same to you, Googin. + +GOOGIN. I jest drapped in to see if you naded any more heat or +anything like that. My, my, but I've been working hard the day. Sure, +to be the janitor of an apartment house is no cinch at all, at all. +And paple are not as liberal as they used to be, aven at Christmas +time. + +WARREN. Have a cigar. + +GOOGIN. Thank ye, sor. (_Smokes one._) + +KITTY. Warren, you'd better try on your costume. I might have to +change something, you know. + +WARREN. But I-- + +KITTY. Please. We haven't got much time. It's after four. + +WARREN (_crosses to left_). All right. (_Exits L._) + +KITTY. Now, Mr. Googin, I want you to go down stairs and tell your +wife to come up. I have a nice little present for her. + +GOOGIN (_brightening_). Have ye, now? A prisint for Honoria? Sure, +it's a kind and thoughtful lady ye are. + +KITTY. She's at home, isn't she? + +GOOGIN. She is that. + +KITTY. Ask her to come up here and wish us a merry Christmas. + +WARREN _appears at L._ + +WARREN. Kitty, how does that ruffle thing work? I can't get it around +my head at all. I don't know the combination. + +KITTY. Oh, I must have sewed it together. Can't you get it over your +head? + +WARREN. Not without choking myself. + +KITTY. Wait a minute. I'll rip it for you. (_Exits L._) + +WARREN (_gets box of cigars and hands it to Googin_). Here's a little +Christmas present, Googin. They're awfully good. I smoked two of them. + +GOOGIN (_lights one_). Thank ye, sor. + +WARREN. Don't let my wife see you smoking in here. She doesn't like +it. + +GOOGIN (_chokes, takes cigar from mouth, looks at it_). What kind of a +stogie is it, Mr. Williams? + +WARREN. It's pure Havana. Santas Odoriferous. + +GOOGIN (_smells it_). It's odoriferous all right, all right. Begorry, +it smells like someone had been burnin' the beans. + +WARREN. That's the way all pure Havanas smell. + +GOOGIN. I think I'll chop 'em up and smoke 'em in me pipe. Much +obliged, sor, and merry Christmas to the both of yeez. Tell yer wife +that me and Honoria will be right up. (_Exits R._) + +_Enter_ KITTY _from L._ + +KITTY. It's all right now. I left an opening. And I sewed on the last +pompon. Warren, don't you think we ought to remember the Googins? + +WARREN. I do remember them. When people have faces like the Googins +one never forgets them. + +KITTY. He's such a good janitor. Really, I think we ought to make them +a little present. + +WARREN. But I'm busted, Kitty. Those masquerade tickets will take our +last cent. + +KITTY. We might give the Googins some little thing here. (_Looks +around._) I have it! + +WARREN. Yes? + +KITTY. We'll give them Aunt Minerva's picture. + +WARREN. Thank goodness. At last we've found a use for Aunt Minerva's +picture. Ever since you hung it up there it's haunted me. But the +Googins don't want it. + +KITTY. I'm sure they will. They're frightfully poor and it would just +match their furniture, I'm sure. Henceforth Aunt Minerva shall shed +her light in the basement. + +_Enter_ MRS. GOOGIN _from R., followed by_ GOOGIN, _smoking a cigar._ + +MRS. GOOGIN. A merry Christmas to the both of yeez. (_To_ KITTY.) Me +man Maginnis tould me ye wanted to see me. + +KITTY (_at R._). Yes, indeed; come right in. + +MRS. GOOGIN. I know what it is, darlin'. Sure it's a bit of a prisint +fer me and the childer, now ain't it, Mrs. Williams? (_Smiles._) + +KITTY (_at R._). What a good guesser you are. + +MRS. GOOGIN. The Widow O'Toole, her in Apartment C, was after givin' +me one of her ould worn-out waists. But I took her down a peg as quick +as a wink. I'm a lady, I am, and me mother was a lady before me, and I +don't accept cast-off clothes fer Christmas prisints. + +KITTY. You don't. (_At R.C. near front with_ MRS. GOOGIN.) + +GOOGIN (_at rear L. with_ WARREN). And nather do I. + +MRS. GOOGIN. The ould bachelor in Apartment F gave me a fine prisint. +I brung it up to show yeez. (_Shows fancy waste basket, tied with +ribbon bows._) It's a new bunnet. (_Puts it on her head._) Sure, +that's a Christmas prisint that touches me heart. + +KITTY. I'm going to give you that picture. (_Points to crayon +portrait._) + +MRS. GOOGIN. The picture of the ould lady, is it? + +KITTY. Yes. It's a lovely frame. + +MRS. GOOGIN. And it's a nice lookin' ould lady, too. She looks a +little like me own mother, who before she was married to a Mulvaney +was a McShane. + +KITTY. Warren, take it down. + +WARREN. With pleasure. (_Takes picture down._) + +MRS. GOOGIN (_taking the picture_). Sure, I have no picture of me own +mother at all, at all. More's the pity. I'll jist take this picture +and then I'll be after tellin' all me frinds that it is a likeness of +me mother who was a McShane from County Kilkenny. (_Sits R._) + +GOOGIN. Would ye decave yer frinds, Honoria? + +MRS. GOOGIN. A little deception is the spice of life. And besides it +looks enough like herself to be her own photygraft. Don't it, +Maginnis? + +GOOGIN. Sure it looks like a chromo to me. + +MRS. GOOGIN (_angrily_). A chromo, is it? + +GOOGIN. Yis, or wan of them comic valentines. + +MRS. GOOGIN. Listen to that now. He says me own mother looks like a +chromo and a comic valentine. I'm a lady, I am, and me mother was a +lady before me, and if I wasn't a lady, sure I'd break the picture +over yer head, Maginnis Googin. Insulted am I and right before me +face! (_Weeps._) Oh, wurra, wurra, that me own ould mother, who was a +McShane, should live to see that day whin her daughter's own husband +would call her a comic valentine. (_Weeps and rocks back and forth._) + +GOOGIN (_close to her_). I said nawthin' about yer mother, Honoria +Googin. I only remarked that the picture resimbled a comic valentine. +And it do. And I'll lave it to Mr. Williams whither I'm right or no. + +MRS. GOOGIN (_rises with dignity, goes to_ KITTY). I thank ye kindly +fer yer prisint, Mrs. Williams, and I wish yeez all the compliments of +the season. (_Turns to_ GOOGIN _savagely._) As fer you, Maginnis +Googin, ather ye beg me mother's pardon fer yer insults, or it's +nather bite ner sup ye'll git in my house this night. (_Sails out at +R. carrying picture and waste basket._) + +GOOGIN. Wait a minute. Listen to me, Nora, darlin'. Let me explain. +(_Follows her out at R._) + +WARREN. Well, there goes Aunt Minerva. + +KITTY. And she sent it to us last Christmas. + +WARREN. I'm glad she decided not to visit us this year. Money is +scarce at the end of the month and she's better off in Kankakee. New +York isn't any place for Aunt Minerva on Christmas Day. + +KITTY. I'm afraid auntie's gait is not quite up to New York in the +holiday season. + +WARREN. I think I'll try on my costume. Are you sure I can get into +the ruff now? + +KITTY. Oh, yes. Wasn't that stupid of me? Just like making a skirt and +then sewing up the top of it. (_Exit_ WARREN _at L._) + +_Enter_ GOOGIN _from R._ + +GOOGIN. Sure, it's a sad time we're havin' down in the basement. + +KITTY. What has happened? + +GOOGIN. Herself has locked the door of the apartment and divil a bit +will she open it at all. + +KITTY. Why, Mr. Googin! + +GOOGIN. I'm in a pretty pickle now. All me money is locked up in me +house with Honoria. You could be doin' me a great favor, if ye would, +Mrs. Williams, mum. + +KITTY. What is it, Mr. Googin? + +GOOGIN. Go down to the basement and tell me wife to open the door to +her lawful wedded husband. + +KITTY. Why, of course I will. (_Exits R._) + +GOOGIN (_sits down comfortably and lights a cigar from his box_). +Sure, it's a sad Christmas for me, so it is, whin Honoria lets an ould +picture come bechune a man and his wife. (_Smokes._) Begorry, I smell +something. (_Sniffs._) It's awful. (_Rises._) Some wan is burning some +rubber. Maybe I've got too much hate on in the radiators. (_Sniffs._) +My, my, what an awful smell. (_Removes cigar and looks at it, smells +it, makes horrible grimace._) Oh, ho, so it's you, is it? (_Throws it +in cuspidor._) No wonder they call it Santas Odoriferous. If that +cigar came from Havana they'd ought to take it back there again and +give it a dacent burial. + +_Enter_ EDDIE _from R. with the hat in box._ + +EDDIE. Say, Mr. Googin! + +GOOGIN. What is it, Eddie? + +EDDIE. Does you want to buy a nice Christmas present for a lady? + +GOOGIN. Maybe I do. What is it? + +EDDIE. A nice hat. Right in de latest style. Jes' come home from de +millinery store. Mis' Lacey gib it to me for a Christmas present, and +I ain't got no use for it. + +GOOGIN. Begorry, that's a good idea. I'll make peace with me wife. +Eddie, I'll trade ye a nice box of cigars for the hat. + +EDDIE. Is 'em some ob Mistah Williamses cigars? + +GOOGIN. They are. Santas Odoriferous. + +EDDIE. Man, man, I wouldn't deprive you ob dem cigars for de world. + +GOOGIN. Sure it's no depravity at all, at all. + +EDDIE. I'll sell you de hat for two dollars cash money. + +GOOGIN. Two dollars, is it? + +EDDIE. Yas, sah, and it's worth 'bout ten dollars. De lady done say +it's worth _more'n_ ten dollars. + +GOOGIN. I'll take it. (_Takes out old wallet, counts out two dollars +in small change and gives it to_ EDDIE.) + +EDDIE. Yas, sah. Dat's right. + +GOOGIN. There's yer two dollars. + +EDDIE. And dere's yer hat. (_Gives him box._) Excuse me, boss. I hears +de elevator bell. (_Exits R._) + +GOOGIN (_opens box and looks at the hat_). Begorry, I've been robbed. +Eddie! Ye thavin' nagur, come here. Niver in all the world would me +wife wear an orange hat. She hates orange worse ner pizen. + +_Enter_ KITTY _from R._ GOOGIN _has hat in the box._ + +KITTY. It's all right, Mr. Googin. I had a long talk with your wife +and she's all ready for you. + +GOOGIN. Ready for me? With a flatiron belike. + +KITTY. No, no. Her face is wreathed in smiles. She's waiting for you +with a real Kilkenny welcome. + +GOOGIN (_smiles_). Is she now? Sure, Mrs. Williams, mum, it's a grand +lady ye are. Excuse me, mum, but this bein' Christmas day, I was +wonderin' whether you'd be after accepting a wee bit of a Christmas +present from the likes of me? + +KITTY. Why, Mr. Googin, how very kind and thoughtful. + +GOOGIN (_hands her the box_). It's here, mum. A fine hat it is. Right +out of the millinery store. + +KITTY. Oh, thank you so much. I'm just crazy to see it. (_Takes it +out._) What! (_Stares at it._) + +GOOGIN. Ain't it a beauty, mum? + +KITTY (_recovering_). Oh, yes, indeed, Mr. Googin. But it is a far too +expensive present for you to give me. You'd better give it to your +wife. Here, I'll wrap it all up again. + +GOOGIN. But me wife won't wear orange. + +KITTY. Tell her to take off the orange and replace it with a green +bow. I'll give her a nice green gauze bow. + +GOOGIN (_smiling_). Will ye now? + +KITTY. Yes. Take it down to her now. It will please her so much. +She'll welcome you with open arms. + +GOOGIN. I'll do it. (_Takes box._) And I'm much obliged for your +trouble, mum. (_Exits R._) + +KITTY. Warren! + +WARREN (_outside L._). Yes? + +KITTY. Are you dressed yet? It's nearly five o'clock. + +WARREN. Sure. + +_Enter_ WARREN _from L., wearing white Pierrot costume._ + +KITTY. Oh, it's a dream. + +WARREN. I feel like a fool. Say, Kittens, you'd better get into yours. + +_Enter_ MRS. GOOGIN _from R. with picture._ + +MRS. GOOGIN (_not seeing Warren_). Sure I had to run up to tell yeez +that iverything was all right, Mrs. Williams. And it's a darlin' y' +are. + +KITTY. Oh, I'm so glad. + +MRS. GOOGIN (_seeing Warren_). Howly snakes of Ireland, what's that? + +KITTY. That's Warren. + +MRS. GOOGIN. He gave me such a start. I thought it was wan of them +circus clowns got loose, mum. + +WARREN (_gayly_). Wait till you see me with my paint on. (_Runs out +L._) + +MRS. GOOGIN. Me husband has given me his consint and I can hang up the +picture in me drawing-room, and he furthermore says that me mother is +a quane and the picture is her perfect likeness. + +KITTY. Then I'm sure you'll have a very merry Christmas, Mrs. Googin. + +MRS. GOOGIN. I brought you up a little Christmas gift, mum. + +KITTY. You did? + +MRS. GOOGIN (_takes out the hat_). Ain't it a beauty? + +KITTY. Indeed it is. But really you should keep that for yourself. + +MRS. GOOGIN. Indade I'll not. I says to Maginnis, says I, "She's +trated me like a lady, and I'll trate her like a lady also." So, +here's yer Christmas prisint and many happy returns of the day. + +KITTY. But this is such an expensive present, Mrs. Googin. Really, I-- + +MRS. GOOGIN (_loftily_). What's ixpense bechune frinds? + +KITTY. I don't think I ought to accept such a lovely gift. + +MRS. GOOGIN. Ye'll be hurtin' me feelings if ye don't. I'm a lady, +Mrs. Williams, and me mother was a lady before me, and I have very, +very sensitive feelings. + +KITTY (_sighs, then takes hat and box_). Very well, Mrs. Googin. Thank +you so much. + +MRS. GOOGIN. And now I'll be goin' back to the basement. I hope ye +have a pleasant time at yer party, mum. + +KITTY. Thank you, Mrs. Googin. + +MRS. GOOGIN. Are you goin' to fix yerself up like a circus clown, too? + +KITTY. Oh, no. I'm to be Pierrette. + +MRS. GOOGIN. Pierrette, is it? Well, look out ye don't git pinched. +Merry Christmas. (_Exit R._) + +_Enter_ WARREN _from L._ + +WARREN. Kittens, there's a poor beggar woman out on the back steps. +Can't you find something for her? + +KITTY. No, I haven't a thing. (_Sees hat box._) Oh, yes, I have! Tell +her to come in. (_Exit_ WARREN _at L._) Now, I'll be rid of my +Christmas hoodoo. (_Puts hat in box._) + +_Enter_ HARD TIMES ANNIE _from L., weeping loudly._ + +ANNIE. Oh, oh! On Christmas day! Just to think of it. Oh! (_Wails._) + +KITTY. What is it, my good woman? What's the matter? + +ANNIE. Oh, mum, it's starving I am. A poor lone widow with sivin +little children huddled up in the straw in a stable. No fire have we, +no coal have we, no food have we. And on Christmas day, too. +(_Cries._) Could ye let me have a little money, mum? + +KITTY (_looks in her purse and shows audience that it is empty._) No, +I haven't any money. + +ANNIE. And it's such hard times we're having. With the cost of living +so high and me with sivin children. No fire have we, no coal have we, +no food have we. + +KITTY. I'm so sorry for you. + +ANNIE. Thank ye kindly, mum. And can you help me a little? + +KITTY. How would you like a nice winter hat? It's perfectly new and +has never been worn. It's red and orange. + +ANNIE. Oh, lady, yer a fallen angel, so yer are, fallen right down +from the skies. I'd rather have a nice winter hat than have a bushel +of coal. + +KITTY. There it is. And merry Christmas. + +ANNIE. Thank you, mum. Has it got flowers on it or feathers? + +KITTY. Feathers. + +ANNIE. Oh, thank ye. Yer a fallen angel; indade ye are, mum. + +KITTY. You'd better go out this way. (_Points to R._) I don't want my +husband to see what I've given you. + +ANNIE. I know how it is, mum. I've had two of 'em meself. But nather +one was a circus clown, mum. I suppose that makes 'em bad-tempered. + +KITTY. Yes, I suppose so. Good-bye. + +ANNIE (_crosses to door R._). Merry Christmas, mum. And bless ye for +what ye have done for me this day. Yer a fallen angel, mum; indeed yer +are. (_Exits R._) + +_Enter_ WARREN _from L._ + +WARREN. Get rid of her? + +KITTY. Yes. Gave her some little things. Now I must hurry and dress. +How nice you look. I'll be ready in ten minutes. (_Exit L._) + +(_Ring at bell R._) + +WARREN (_opens the door, admitting_ LAURA). Hello, Lolly. + +LAURA. Are you all ready? + +WARREN. Kittens has just started to dress. Did you get the tickets? + +LAURA. Yes. Here they are. Jim's waiting for me. + +WARREN (_takes the two tickets_). Thank you. + +LAURA. I had an awful time getting the places reserved. + +WARREN. Ten dollars, aren't they? + +LAURA. Yes. + +WARREN. Just a minute, till I get the money. Sit down. Kittens has the +money. (_Exit L._) + +LAURA (_calls after him_). Hurry, please, Warren. + +WARREN (_outside_). All right. + +LAURA _crosses to R. and sits. She takes up the fashion magazine and +reads a moment. Rises impatiently and walks around the room, showing +marked impatience. After a pause_ KITTY _enters from L. wearing a +kimono._ + +KITTY. Laura! + +LAURA. Yes, dear. + +KITTY. That hat I gave you! + +LAURA. The hat? + +KITTY. Yes, the one I gave you for Christmas. Warren had just given it +to me as a present, and as it wasn't becoming to me so I gave it to +you. Where is it? + +LAURA. Why? + +KITTY. He put ten dollars in it at the millinery shop. It was hidden +in the lining. The ten dollars for the tickets. + +LAURA. Good heavens! + +KITTY. So that pays you for the tickets, doesn't it? + +LAURA. But I gave it away. + +KITTY. Why, Laura! + +LAURA. It wasn't becoming to me, either. I gave it to Eddie. + +KITTY (_weakly_). To Eddie? + +LAURA. Of course I didn't know it had ten dollars hidden in the +lining. + +KITTY. I didn't think you'd treat my present that way. + +LAURA. Now, Kittens-- + +KITTY (_angrily_). Gave it to the negro elevator boy. Well, I like +that! That hat cost ten dollars. + +LAURA. I never could have worn it. + +KITTY. But you shouldn't have given it away. + +LAURA. Warren gave it to you and you gave it away. + +KITTY. That's different. + +LAURA. Shall I explain to Warren? + +KITTY. No; for goodness sakes, don't do that! I haven't a cent to my +name and I can't explain to Warren. How can I tell him I gave his +Christmas present away? + +LAURA. Send for Eddie and make him give you the ten dollars. + +KITTY. Eddie hasn't got it. + +LAURA. What did he do with it? + +KITTY. I don't know. A beggar woman has the hat now. I saw her with +it. + +LAURA. Then she has the ten dollars. + +KITTY. Laura, you'll have to trust me until the first of the month. + +LAURA (_coldly_). Oh, very well. It's of no importance. + +KITTY. Now, Laura-- + +LAURA (_crosses to door R._). In the future I'd advise you to keep +your Christmas presents. I must go now. Jim is waiting for me. + +KITTY. Lolly-- + +LAURA. We'll probably see you at the dinner. (_Exit R._) + +KITTY (_crying_). I'll never give another present away as long as I +live. + +WARREN (_outside L._). Hurry, Kittens; it's almost time to go. + +KITTY. In a minute. (_Exits L._) + +_Enter_ EDDIE _from R., followed by_ MISS MINERVA. _She carries the +hat in her hand._ + +MISS M. That will do, boy. Mr. Williams is my nephew. I'll find him. + +EDDIE. Lawdy, now she's got de hat. (_Exits R._) + +_Enter_ WARREN _from L._ + +WARREN (_to_ MISS M.). I beg pardon? + +MISS M. Heavens! + +WARREN. What's the matter? + +MISS M. I thought you were a ghost. + +WARREN. I am Mr. Williams. + +MISS M. You are? (Drops everything, runs to him and shakes both his +hands heartily.) Don't you know me? + +WARREN. No; never saw you before in my life. + +MISS M. I'm your Aunt Minerva. + +WARREN. Not Aunt Minerva Mockridge from Kankakee? + +MISS M. (_positively_). Aunt Minerva Mockridge from Kankakee. + +WARREN. But I thought you said you weren't coming. + +MISS M. I changed my mind. And I wanted to surprise you and Kitty. + +WARREN. Well, you did. You've surprised us all right. + +MISS M. Let me sit down. I've had such an adventure. (Holds up hat.) +See what I brought you? + +WARREN. A hat? + +MISS M. Yes, what's left of it. + +WARREN. It looks just like the one I gave Kittens for a Christmas +present. + +MISS M. I got out of the taxi at the corner and was walking along +trying to find the house when all of a sudden I heard a great +commotion down the street behind me. I turned around and just then a +man darted right at me, slapped the hat in my hand and was off like +the wind. A crowd of policemen were chasing him. I slipped into the +vestibule of a building and luckily it was this house. + +_Enter_ EDDIE _and_ HOGAN _from R._ + +EDDIE. You can't come in yere. Not unless you got a search warrant. + +HOGAN. I saw her run into the vestibule, boy--and I'll find her if I +have to search every apartment from piano to ice-box. (_Sees_ MISS M.) +There she is now. That woman just came up in the elevator, didn't she? + +EDDIE. Yassir, boss; dat's de one. + +HOGAN (_goes to_ MISS M.). Come on with me. I guess I've got you at +last. + +MISS M. What do you mean? + +WARREN. Officer, this lady is my aunt. I am Mr. Williams, the owner of +this apartment. + +HOGAN (_to_ EDDIE). Is that man the owner of this apartment? + +EDDIE. Yessir, boss; dat's Mr. Williams. + +HOGAN. And you say this lady is your aunt? + +MISS M. Of course I'm his aunt. + +HOGAN. That'll do you! Keep still or I'll put the bracelets on ye. + +WARREN. Well, she _said_ she was my aunt. + +HOGAN. Have ye ever seen her before? + +WARREN. No, sir. + +HOGAN (_turns to_ EDDIE _at R._). Ye hear? He thinks she's his aunt +and yet he niver seen her before. This woman is a crook. One of the +worst in the country. She's old Boston Bell and is wanted in Omaha for +highway robbery, in Salt Lake for arson, in Chicago for shoplifting, +in Columbus for assault and battery, and in New York for receiving +stolen goods. + +WARREN. And I thought she was my Aunt Minerva. + +MISS M. (_at L.C._). Warren Williams, are you going to let that man +stand there and insult me? Throw him out of your house. + +HOGAN (_C._). I was standing on me beat when I saw Dopey Daniel snatch +a swell hat from a poor old woman. She screams and he hot-foots it +down the street with me after him. This dame was standing at the +corner. She was working with him. He saw we had him all right, so he +slipped the hat to her and she made a getaway up the elevator. Come +on, Boston Bell. I've got you with the goods on you. I want that hat +for evidence. Now will you come easy or must I use the cuffs? (_Pulls +her to door R._) + +MISS M. (_screams_). Kitty, Kitty! Help, help! + +_Enter_ KITTY _from R._ + +KITTY. Aunt Minerva! (_Rushes to her and embraces her._) What is the +meaning of all this? + +AUNT M. (_at R., weeping_). Oh, Kitty, Kitty, I'm arrested. On my +first visit to New York. Oh, why did I ever leave Kankakee? + +KITTY. Warren, make him release her. + +HOGAN. Are you sure she's your aunt? + +KITTY. Of course I am. Why, we have her picture. There it is. Oh, +no--I'd forgotten. + +HOGAN. I believe the whole gang of yeez is a bunch of crooks. Yeez +look like crooks, all drissed up like clowns and things. + +KITTY. Eddie, call the janitor. + +EDDIE. Here he comes now. + +_Enter_ GOOGIN _from R. with_ MRS. GOOGIN. + +HOGAN. Maginnis Googin, is it yerself? + +GOOGIN. What's goin' on here, Hogan. Who's been pinched? + +HOGAN. This dame is Boston Bell. We got her with the goods. She stole +a hat. + +KITTY. Why, that's my hat. Isn't it, Warren? + +WARREN. I thought it looked familiar. (_Takes hat._) Yes, that's your +hat. (_Takes two five-dollar bills from the lining._) Now, I know it's +your hat. + +KITTY. But where did you get it, Aunt Minerva? + +MISS M. Some man ran into me in the street and left it in my hand. + +GOOGIN. Hogan, sure I think you've made a mistake. + +HOGAN. Do you know these folks, Googin? + +MRS. GOOGIN. I know them, Officer Hogan. It's the Williamses, and +they're both perfect ladies. And I'm a lady, and so was me mother +before me. + +GOOGIN. Hush, Honoria. Ye've been drinkin' too much frozen egg nog. + +MRS. GOOGIN (_crying_). And the ould lady that ye've pinched, sure I +blave it's me ould mother from Kilkenny, Ireland. Oh, Maginnis, +they've pinched me ould mother. + +GOOGIN. It's all a mistake, Hogan. + +HOGAN (_to_ MISS M.). Ye say a man ran into you in the street and left +this hat in your hand? + +MISS M. Yes, sir. + +HOGAN (_to_ KITTY). And you say it's your hat? + +KITTY. Of course it is. + +WARREN (_goes to_ HOGAN, _gives him a five-dollar bill_). I think that +will be all, officer. Merry Christmas. + +HOGAN. Merry Christmas to all of yeez. (_Exits L., followed by_ +EDDIE.) + +KITTY. Mrs. Googin, this is my aunt, Miss Mockridge from Kankakee. + +MRS. GOOGIN. Sure, I thought it was me ould mother from Kilkenny. Ye +look enough like her to be her own twin sister, ye do. + +GOOGIN. I came up to inform yeez that the taxi do be waiting. + +MISS M. Taxi? Are you going out? + +KITTY (_looks at_ WARREN). Well--er--that is--er we-- + +WARREN. Yes, er--we thought you weren't coming. + +MISS M. Where are you going? + +KITTY. We were going to a masquerade dinner dance, but now that you've +come we'll stay at home. + +GOOGIN (_to_ MISS M.). Ye'd better go to the dance, mum. Ye'll have +the time of yer life. Faith, they've nothin' like it in Kankakee. +Come on, Honoria. + +MRS. GOOGIN. All of yeez come down and take tea wid me in the marnin' +fer breakfast. Merry New Year and happy Christmas to all. I'm a lady +and me mother was a lady before me, and I knows a lady whin I sees +her. So I wish yeez all a happy Christmas and many of them. (_Exits R. +with_ GOOGIN.) + +WARREN. Shall I send the taxi away, Kittens? + +MISS M. I should say not. I'm going to that masquerade ball, if it's +the last thing I ever do. That's why I came to New York. (_Takes out +purse._) Here's a hundred and twenty dollars. That's enough to see us +through until breakfast, isn't it? + +KITTY. We mustn't keep the taxi waiting. Come on, auntie. We're going +to show you the time of your life. + +MISS M. But I haven't any costume. + +KITTY (_puts the hat on her head_). There you are. Now you're all +fixed. I knew I could make some use of my Christmas hat. Hurry, +Warren. (They hurry out R. as curtain falls.) + +CURTAIN. + + +NOTES ON THE PRODUCTION. + +This little satire on Christmas giving has been written to provide +forty-five minutes of amusement for a holiday audience. The stage +settings are very simple, a room with two doors being all that is +required. + + +COSTUMES. + +WARREN--A brisk young business man of about twenty-five. Ordinary +winter suit for first entrance. Change to white Pierrot costume with +white pumps, white socks, white pajama suit with large black pompons, +or discs of black satin, on it. Large stiff ruff of white tulle. Face +whitened with grease paint. Black patches. Black satin half-mask in +hand. Head covered with close fitting white covering in Pierrot style. + +KITTY--A bright, vivacious young wife of twenty-two. Afternoon dress +at first, but choose one that may be quickly changed. Changed to +kimono as indicated in text. On last entrance she wears a Pierrette +costume, white pumps, hose, white tulle dress with very full skirts, +ankle length. White clown cap. The dress may be trimmed with black +satin discs, or pompons, or toy balloons in festoons, as desired. + +MISS MINERVA--Aged forty-five. Gray hair. Spectacles. Dark traveling +cloak and hat. Grip. She discards cloak and hat when Hogan releases +her, showing a very gay dress beneath. Faint gray wrinkles of grease +paint on face. + +GOOGIN--Irish janitor. Red wig and whiskers all around face. Face +reddened. White grease paint on upper lip. Red eyebrows. Old suit and +cardigan jacket. + +MRS. GOOGIN--Portly lady in gaudy dress of calico. Gray hair, parted. +Green bows on costume. Face red and lined with gray grease paint. Use +a decided Irish brogue. + +EDDIE--Negro elevator boy. Face blackened with burnt cork. Uniform +much too small for him. Negro wig. + +LAURA--Afternoon dress for first entrance. No hat, as she lives in +the same apartment house. Masquerade costume and opera cloak for last +entrance. + +HOGAN--Irish policeman. Uniform, helmet, billie, etc. + +ANNIE--Old shoes, very ragged dress, old gray shawl on head. +Straggling locks of white hair show beneath shawl. Red patches. Face +heavily lined with gray grease paint. Very old and dirty apron. + + + + +Dances, Drills and Story-Plays + +By NINA B. LAMKIN + +_Director of Normal Course in Physical Education at Northwestern +School of Oratory and Physical Education, Evanston, Ill._ + +[Illustration] + +Fourteen Folk Dances of various countries, suitable for schools, +clubs, churches, settlements, etc. Twenty-six simple AEsthetic Dances, +as Dances of the Seasons, Flower Dances, Brownies, Fairies, Bluebirds, +etc. Twenty-four Drills for every day and holidays, unusual, artistic +and worth while. Forty-one Rhythms and twelve Story-Plays to be used +with primary ages in every-day recreation, in dramatization and in +entertainments. There is something in this book to fit any occasion +where such material is desired. For Boy Scouts, Camp Fire Girls, +Gymnasium Work, Play Festivals, Field Days, etc. Everything fully +described. Suggestive music named and description of costumes given. +Contains eight original photographs, half-toned, of various dances. + +=Beautiful cloth binding, lettering and design in two colors, clear, +attractive type. Price, $1.25= + +=T.S. Denison & Company, Publishers= +623 S. Wabash Ave. CHICAGO + + + + +Merry Monologues + +By MARY MONCURE PARKER + +[Illustration] + +These selections are wholly original and sufficiently varied in +character and sentiment to enable the reader to make up a well-rounded +program in which high comedy mingles with farce and pathos in a manner +suitable for all occasions. Nineteen monologues and nine short poems +which are especially adapted to that particular form of entertainment +called the pianologue, viz., reading to music. + +Some of the selections are new but most of them are the pick from the +author's wide repertoire, which she has used throughout this country +and in England. They bear the stamp of enthusiastic public approval +and are now first offered to the public. + +=Contents:= On the Street Car; The Renaissance of the Kiss; Husbands Is +Husbands; Oh, Friend of Mine; George's First Sweetheart; Bobby and the +New Baby; Lucile Gets Ready for a Dance; Mandy's Man and Safety First; +Maggie McCarthy Goes on a Diet; Mrs. Climber Doesn't Like Notoriety; +Lucindy Jones Expects a Legacy; Grown Folks Is so Awful Queer; At the +Movies; The Gingie Boy; Ode to a Manikin; Isaacstein's Busy Day; Like +Pilgrims to the Appointed Place; Mrs. Bargain Counter Meets a Friend; +Mother Mine; Maggie McCarthy Has Her Fortune Told; In Vaudeville; +Uncle Jim and the Liniment; The Funny Story; In the Milliner Shop; +Mrs. Trubble's Troubles; George's Cousin Willie; When Lucindy Goes to +Town; A Question. + +=Beautiful cloth binding, lettering and design in two colors, clear, +attractive type. Price, $1.25= + +=T.S. Denison & Company, Publishers= +623 S. Wabash Ave. CHICAGO + + + + +Let's Pretend + +A Book of Children's Plays + +By LINDSEY BARBEE + +[Illustration] + +"Come--let's pretend!" has been the slogan of all childhood. A few gay +feathers have transformed an everyday lad into a savage warrior; a +sweeping train has given a simple gingham frock the dignity of a court +robe; the power of make-believe has changed a bare attic into a gloomy +forest or perhaps into a royal palace. These six plays will appeal to +the imagination, to the fun-loving nature and to the best ideals of +all children. + +CONTENTS.--The Little Pink Lady (6 Girls); The Ever-Ever Land (16 +Boys, 17 Girls); When the Toys Awake (15 Boys, 5 Girls); The Forest of +Every Day (5 Boys, 7 Girls); A Christmas Tree Joke (7 Boys, 7 Girls); +"If Don't-Believe Is Changed Into Believe" (21 Boys, 15 Girls). Full +descriptions for producing; easy to costume and "put on." Clever +illustrations showing the appearance of each character. The most +charming children's plays ever written. + +=Beautiful cloth binding, lettering and design in two colors, +attractive type.= + +=Price, $1.25= + +=T.S. Denison & Company, Publishers= +623 S. Wabash Ave. CHICAGO + + + + +Impromptu Magic, with Patter + +By GEORGE DE LAWRENCE + +[Illustration] + +A supreme collection of clever, off-hand tricks that can be presented +with little or no practice, require no sleight-of-hand skill and are +independent of any apparatus. The only articles called for are +ordinary coins, cards, matches, etc., such as are always at hand. An +excellent line of patter, in which humor predominates, is included for +each trick and there are numerous illustrations. + +Among the many clever but easy effects taught may be mentioned the +lemon and dollar bill trick without sleight-of-hand, several baffling +mind reading effects, card in the pocket, vanishing drinking glass, +penetrating match, traveling coins, four-coin trick, coins out of hat, +dime and penny trick, swallowing a knife, torn and restored paper +napkin, etc. + +Dr. A.M. Wilson, editor of "The Sphinx," who contributes the +introduction, says: + +"Many books and booklets on patter, numerous works, little and big, on +magic, have been published. But not until this work of DeLawrence has +there been one that covered both, and with material that anyone of +reasonable intelligence could use successfully and satisfactorily. +Having read the manuscript I congratulate the author on his wise +selection of tricks and on the sensible and appropriate patter." + +=Attractively bound in art boards, fully illustrated, well printed on +good paper.= + +=Price, $1.00= + +=T.S. Denison & Company, Publishers= +623 South Wabash Avenue CHICAGO + + + + +Winning Monologues + +By LILIAN HOLMES STRACK + +[Illustration] + +For contests and public speaking. Eighteen splendid original +selections for platform use in book form. The author has successfully +portrayed various "types" in their most human and amusing aspects, and +presents each monologue in a form that complies with the contest rules +generally prevalent. Each of these readings is a real cross-section of +life. The humor is essentially human, and not merely witty. Various +types of human beings are represented, all in a fashion that has a +sure appeal to any audience. The book is invaluable for professional +entertainers as well as for contest use. + +CONTENTS.--Johnny Gets Ready for Company; Aunt Polly at the Rural Aid +Society; The Strap-Hangers; Little Maymie Attends the Movies; The +Cheerful Laundress; John Tells a Bedtime Story; Aunt Polly Has +Callers; Just Mary Louise; Friday Afternoon in Our School; When Edna +Telephones; Johnny Does His Home Work; Look Pleasant, Please! Little +Maymie Visits the City; In the Dark of the (Honey) Moon; The +Punishment of Mary Louise; Practicing Domestic Science, or How Girls +Cook; On Contest Night; The Telephone Exchange at Junction Center. + +=Beautiful cloth binding, lettering and design in two colors, +attractive type.= + +=Price, $1.25= + +=T.S. Denison & Company, Publishers= +623 South Wabash Avenue CHICAGO + + + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The White Christmas and other Merry +Christmas Plays, by Walter Ben Hare + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE WHITE CHRISTMAS *** + +***** This file should be named 19826.txt or 19826.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/1/9/8/2/19826/ + +Produced by Suzanne Shell, Linda Cantoni, and the Online +Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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