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diff --git a/old/orig18575-h/p5.htm b/old/orig18575-h/p5.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..eee9c43 --- /dev/null +++ b/old/orig18575-h/p5.htm @@ -0,0 +1,4225 @@ +<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.01 Transitional//EN"> +<html lang="en"> +<head> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=iso-8859-1"> +<title> +CENT NOUVELLES NOUVELLES, PART V., STORIES 81-100 +</title> + +<style type="text/css"> + <!-- + body {background: #faebd7; text-align:justify} + P { margin:10%; + text-indent: 1em; + margin-top: .75em; + margin-bottom: .75em; } + H1,H2,H3,H4,H5,H6 { text-align: center; margin-left: 20%; margin-right: 20%; } + hr { width: 50%; } + hr.full { width: 100%; } + .foot { margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%; text-align: justify; text-indent: -3em; font-size: 95%; } + img {border: 0;} + HR { width: 33%; text-align: center; } + blockquote {font-size: 97%; margin-left: 20%; margin-right: 20%;} + .figleft {float: left; margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 1%;} + .figright {float: right; margin-right: 10%; margin-left: 1%;} + CENTER { padding: 10px;} + PRE { font-size: 90%; margin-left: 20%;} + // --> +</style> + +</head> +<body> +<br /> + + +<center> +<big><b>PART V., STORIES 81-100</b></big> +<br /> + + +<br /> + +<a href="#contents"><big><b>Table of Contents</b></big></a> +<br /><br /> + +<a href="#illustrations"><big><b>List of Illustrations</b></big></a> +</center> + + + +<center> +<table summary="" cellPadding=4 border=3> +<tr><td> + + <a href="p4.htm">Previous Part</a> +</td><td> + <a href="main.htm">Main Index</a> + +</td></tr> +</table> +</center> + + +<br /> + + +<a name="image-0001"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/cover.jpg" height="955" width="616" +alt="Cover.jpg" title="Cover +"> +</center> + +<a name="image-0002"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/spines.jpg" height="965" width="338" +alt="Spines.jpg" title="Spines +"> +</center> + +<a name="image-0003"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/titlepage.jpg" height="934" width="667" +alt="Titlepage.jpg" title="Titlepage +"> +</center> + +<a name="2H_4_0001"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + ONE HUNDRED MERRIE AND DELIGHTSOME STORIES +</h2> +<h4> + Right Pleasaunte To Relate In All Goodly Companie By Way Of Joyance And Jollity +</h4> +<h1> +<i>LES CENT NOUVELLES NOUVELLES</i> +</h1> +<h4> +Now First Done Into The English Tongue By Robert B. Douglas +<br /> +<br /> + +Various Authors</h4> +<br /> +<br /> + + +<h2>Edited by Antoine de la Salle</h2> +<br /> +<br /> + +<h3>Illustrated by Léon Lebèque</h3> +<br /> +<br /> + +<h4> +Paris +<br /> +<br /> + +Charles Carrington +<br /> +<br /> + +13 Faubourg Montmartre +<br /> +<br /> + +1899 +</h4> + + + + +<br /> +<br /> +<hr> +<a name="contents"></a> +<br /> +<br /> + + +<h2>Contents</h2> + +<center> +<table summary=""> +<tr><td> + + +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0081"> +STORY THE EIGHTY-FIRST — BETWEEN TWO STOOLS. [81] +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0082"> +STORY THE EIGHTY-SECOND — BEYOND THE MARK. [82] +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0083"> +STORY THE EIGHTY-THIRD — THE GLUTTONOUS MONK. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0084"> +STORY THE EIGHTY-FOURTH — THE DEVIL'S SHARE. [84] +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0085"> +STORY THE EIGHTY-FIFTH — NAILED! [85] +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0086"> +STORY THE EIGHTY-SIXTH — FOOLISH FEAR. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0087"> +STORY THE EIGHTY-SEVENTH — WHAT THE EYE DOES NOT SEE. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0088"> +STORY THE EIGHTY-EIGHTH — A HUSBAND IN HIDING. [88] +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0089"> +STORY THE EIGHTY-NINTH — THE FAULT OF THE ALMANAC. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0090"> +STORY THE NINETIETH — A GOOD REMEDY. [90] +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0091"> +STORY THE NINETY-FIRST — THE OBEDIENT WIFE. [91] +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0092"> +STORY THE NINETY-SECOND — WOMEN'S QUARRELS. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0093"> +STORY THE NINETY-THIRD — HOW A GOOD WIFE WENT ON A PILGRIMAGE. [93] +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0094"> +STORY THE NINETY-FOURTH — DIFFICULT TO PLEASE. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0095"> +STORY THE NINETY-FIFTH — THE SORE FINGER CURED. [95] +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0096"> +STORY THE NINETY-SIXTH — A GOOD DOG. [96] +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0097"> +STORY THE NINETY-SEVENTH — BIDS AND BIDDINGS. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0098"> +STORY THE NINETY-EIGHTH — THE UNFORTUNATE LOVERS. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0099"> +STORY THE NINETY-NINTH — THE METAMORPHOSIS. [99] +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#2H_4_0100"> +STORY THE HUNDREDTH AND LAST — THE CHASTE LOVER. +</a></p> + + +</td></tr> +</table> +</center> + + + + +<br /> +<br /> +<hr> +<a name="illustrations"></a> +<br /> +<br /> + + +<h2>List of Illustrations</h2> + +<center> +<table summary=""> +<tr><td> + +<p class="toc"><a href="#image-0047"> +83.jpg The Gluttonous Monk. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#image-0048"> +84.jpg The Devil's Share. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#image-0049"> +86.jpg Foolish Fear. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#image-0050"> +88.jpg A Husband in Hiding. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#image-0051"> +90.jpg A Good Remedy. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#image-0052"> +92.jpg Women's Quarrels. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#image-0053"> +95.jpg The Sore Finger Cured. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#image-0054"> +97.jpg Bids and Biddings. +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#image-0055"> +100.jpg The Chaste Lover. +</a></p> + +<p class="toc"><a href="#image-0057"> +Endplate.jpg Endplate +</a></p> +<p class="toc"><a href="#image-0058"> +Gilded-top.jpg +</a></p> + + + + +</td></tr> +</table> +</center> + + + +<br /> +<br /> +<hr> + +<a name="2H_TOC"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> + +<br /> +<br /> + + +<h2> + DETAILED CONTENTS CONTENTS +</h2> + +<blockquote> + + + +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0081">STORY THE EIGHTY-FIRST — BETWEEN TWO STOOLS.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a noble knight who was in love with a beautiful young married lady, +<br> +and thought himself in her good graces, and also in those of another +<br> +lady, her neighbour; but lost both as is afterwards recorded.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0082">STORY THE EIGHTY-SECOND — BEYOND THE MARK.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a shepherd who made an agreement with a shepherdess that he should +<br> +mount upon her "in order that he might see farther," but was not to +<br> +penetrate beyond a mark which she herself made with her hand upon the +<br> +instrument of the said shepherd—as will more plainly appear hereafter.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0083">STORY THE EIGHTY-THIRD — THE GLUTTONOUS MONK.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a Carmelite monk who came to preach at a village and after his +<br> +sermon, he went to dine with a lady, and how he stuffed out his gown, as +<br> +you will hear.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0084">STORY THE EIGHTY-FOURTH — THE DEVIL'S SHARE.</a> +<br> +<i>Of one of his marshals who married the sweetest and most lovable woman +<br> +there was in all Germany. Whether what I tell you is true—for I do +<br> +not swear to it that I may not be considered a liar—you will see more +<br> +plainly below.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0085">STORY THE EIGHTY-FIFTH — NAILED!</a> +<br> +<i>Of a goldsmith, married to a fair, kind, and gracious lady, and very +<br> +amorous withal of a curé, her neighbour, with whom her husband found her +<br> +in bed, they being betrayed by one of the goldsmith's servants, who was +<br> +jealous, as you will hear.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0086">STORY THE EIGHTY-SIXTH — FOOLISH PEAR.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a young man of Rouen, married to a fair, young girl of the age of +<br> +fifteen or thereabouts; and how the mother of the girl wished to have +<br> +the marriage annulled by the Judge of Rouen, and of the sentence which +<br> +the said Judge pronounced when he had heard the parties—as you will +<br> +hear more plainly in the course of the said story.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0087">STORY THE EIGHTY-SEVENTH — WHAT THE EYE DOES NOT SEE.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a gentle knight who was enamoured of a young and beautiful girl, +<br> +and how he caught a malady in one of his eyes, and therefore sent for a +<br> +doctor, who likewise fell in love with the same girl, as you will +<br> +hear; and of the words which passed between the knight and the doctor +<br> +concerning the plaster which the doctor had put on the knight's good +<br> +eye.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0088">STORY THE EIGHTY-EIGHTH — A HUSBAND IN HIDING.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a poor, simple peasant married to a nice, pleasant woman, who did +<br> +much as she liked, and who in order that she might be alone with her +<br> +lover, shut up her husband in the pigeon-house in the manner you will +<br> +hear.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0089">STORY THE EIGHTY-NINTH — THE FAULT OF THE ALMANAC.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a curé who forgot, either by negligence or ignorance, to inform his +<br> +parishioners that Lent had come until Palm Sunday arrived, as you +<br> +will hear—and of the manner in which he excused himself to his +<br> +parishioners.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0090">STORY THE NINETIETH — A GOOD REMEDY.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a good merchant of Brabant whose wife was very ill, and he supposing +<br> +that she was about to die, after many remonstrances and exhortations for +<br> +the salvation of her soul, asked her pardon, and she pardoned him all +<br> +his misdeeds, excepting that he had not worked her as much as he ought +<br> +to have done—as will appear more plainly in the said story.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0091">STORY THE NINETY-FIRST — THE OBEDIENT WIFE.</a> +<br> +<i> Of a man who was married to a woman so lascivious and lickerish, that +<br> +I believe she must have been born in a stove or half a league from the +<br> +summer sun, for no man, however well he might work, could satisfy her; +<br> +and how her husband thought to punish her, and the answer she gave him.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0092">STORY THE NINETY-SECOND — WOMEN'S QUARRELS.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a married woman who was in love with a Canon, and, to avoid +<br> +suspicion, took with her one of her neighbours when she went to visit +<br> +the Canon; and of the quarrel that arose between the two women, as you +<br> +will hear.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0093">STORY THE NINETY-THIRD — HOW A GOOD WIFE WENT ON A PILGRIMAGE.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a good wife who pretended to her husband that she was going on +<br> +a pilgrimage, in order to find opportunity to be with her lover the +<br> +parish-clerk—with whom her husband found her; and of what he said and +<br> +did when he saw them doing you know what.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0094">STORY THE NINETY-FOURTH — DIFFICULT TO PLEASE.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a curé who wore a short gown, like a gallant about to be married, +<br> +for which cause he was summoned before the Ordinary, and of the sentence +<br> +which was passed, and the defence he made, and the other tricks he +<br> +played afterwards—as you will plainly hear.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0095">STORY THE NINETY-FIFTH — THE SORE FINGER CURED.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a monk who feigned to be very ill and in danger of death, that he +<br> +might obtain the favours of a certain young woman in the manner which is +<br> +described hereafter.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0096">STORY THE NINETY-SIXTH — A GOOD DOG.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a foolish and rich village curé who buried his dog in the +<br> +church-yard; for which cause he was summoned before his Bishop, ana +<br> +how he gave 60 gold crowns to the Bishop, and what the Bishop said to +<br> +him—which you will find related here.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0097">STORY THE NINETY-SEVENTH — BIDS AND BIDDINGS.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a number of boon companions making good cheer and drinking at +<br> +a tavern, and how one of them had a quarrel with his wife when he +<br> +returned home, as you will hear.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0098">STORY THE NINETY-EIGHTH — THE UNFORTUNATE LOVERS.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a knight of this kingdom and his wife, who had a fair daughter aged +<br> +fifteen or sixteen. Her father would have married her to a rich old +<br> +knight, his neighbour, but she ran away with another knight, a young +<br> +man who loved her honourably; and, by strange mishap, they both died sad +<br> +deaths without having ever co-habited,—as you will hear shortly.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0099">STORY THE NINETY-NINTH — THE METAMORPHOSIS.</a> +<br> +<i>Relates how a Spanish Bishop, not being able to procure fish, ate +<br> +two partridges on a Friday, and how he told his servants that he had +<br> +converted them by his prayers into fish—as will more plainly be related +<br> +below.</i> +<br> +<a href="#2H_4_0100">STORY THE HUNDREDTH AND LAST — THE CHASTE LOVER.</a> +<br> +<i>Of a rich merchant of the city of Genoa, who married a fair damsel, +<br> +who owing to the absence of her husband, sent for a wise clerk—a young, +<br> +fit, and proper man—to help her to that of which she had need; and +<br> +of the fast that he caused her to make—as you will find more plainly +<br> +below.</i> + + + + +</blockquote> + +<br> + + +<hr> +<a name="2H_4_0081"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="81pg (141K)" src="images/81pg.jpg" height="946" width="595" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE EIGHTY-FIRST — BETWEEN TWO STOOLS. <a href="#note-81" name="noteref-81">81</a> +</h2> +<h3> + By Monseigneur De Waurin. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a noble knight who was in love with a beautiful young married lady, +and thought himself in her good graces, and also in those of another +lady, her neighbour; but lost both as is afterwards recorded.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +As all the stories of asses are now finished, I will relate shortly a +true story of a knight whom many of you noble lords have long known. It +is true that this knight was greatly in love—as is often the way with +young men—with a beautiful and noble young lady, who, in that part of +the country where she lived was renowned for her beauty. Nevertheless, +try what means he could to obtain her favours, and become her accepted +lover, he could not succeed—at which he was much displeased, seeing +that never was woman loved more ardently, loyally, and wholly than she +was. Nor should I omit to say that he did as much for her as ever +lover did for his lady, such as jousts, expensive habiliments, +etc.—nevertheless, as has been said, he found her always brusque and +averse, and showing him less love than she reasonably should, for she +knew for a fact that she was loyally and dearly loved by him. And, +to say truth, she was too harsh to him, which, it is to be believed, +proceeded from pride, of which she had too much—it might even be said, +with which she was filled. +</p> +<p> +Matters were in this condition, when another lady, a friend and +neighbour of the first-named damsel, seeing how enamoured the knight +was, fell in love with him herself, and by various honest ways and means +which would take too long to describe, so subtly managed that in a short +time the knight perceived her love, at which he was much vexed, his +heart being wholly given to his harsh and cruel mistress. +</p> +<p> +Being not only kind, but possessed of much common sense he managed +adroitly not to compromise himself, so that if his second love affair +had come to the knowledge of his first mistress, she would have no cause +to blame his conduct. +</p> +<p> +Now listen to the end of his amours. Owing to the distance at which +he lived, he could not so often see his lady-love as his trusting and +loving heart desired. So he determined one day to ask certain knights +and squires, good friends of his, but who knew nothing about his love +affairs, to fly their hawks, and hunt the hare in the district in which +the lady resided, knowing for a fact by his spies, that her husband was +away, having gone to Court, as he often did. +</p> +<p> +As had been arranged, the love-sick knight and his companions started +the next day, early in the morning, from the town where the Court was, +and passed the time until the late afternoon in hunting the hare, and +without eating or drinking. They snatched a hasty repast in a little +village, and after the dinner, which was short and simple, remounted +their horses and continued to hunt the hare. +</p> +<p> +The good knight, who had only one object in view, led his companions +from the city, to which they always wished to return and said to him, +"The hour of vespers is near and it is time to return to the town. If we +do not take care we shall be locked out, and have to stay the night in +some miserable village and all die of hunger." +</p> +<p> +"Don't be alarmed," said the lover; "there is plenty of time, and at +the worst I know a place near here where we shall be very welcome, and I +suppose you will have no objection to meeting ladies." +</p> +<p> +Being all courtiers, thy were not at all disinclined to meet ladies, and +were satisfied to leave the matter in his hands, and continued to hunt +the hare and the partridge as long as daylight lasted. +</p> +<p> +When it was time to think of finding lodgings, the knight said to his +companions, +</p> +<p> +"Come along, come along! I will lead you to the place." About an hour or +two after nightfall, the knight and his comrades arrived at the place +where lived the lady with whom the guide of this little band was so +enamoured that he could not sleep o'nights. They knocked at the door of +the castle, and the varlets quickly came and asked them what they +wanted. And he who was the most deeply concerned, answered and said; +"Gentlemen, are my lord and my lady at home?" "Truly," replied one of +the attendants for all the others, "my lord is not here, but my lady +is." +</p> +<p> +"Tell her if you please, that such and such knights and squires of the +Court, and I, so-and-so, have been hunting the hare in this part of the +country, and have lost our way, and now it is too late to return to the +town. We beg her therefore to receive us as her guests for this night." +</p> +<p> +"Willingly will I tell her," said the other. +</p> +<p> +He went and delivered this message to his mistress, who, instead +of coming to the gentlemen, sent a message, which the servant thus +delivered. +</p> +<p> +"Monseigneur," said the varlet, "my lady wishes me to inform you that +her husband is not here; at which she is much vexed, for if he had been +he would have given you a hearty welcome; but in his absence she does +not dare to receive visitors, and begs you therefore to pardon her." +</p> +<p> +The knight, who had led the expedition, was, you may imagine, much +vexed and ashamed to hear this reply, for he expected to have seen his +mistress, and had a pleasant time with her, and emptied his heart to +her, and he was annoyed that he had brought his companions to a place +where he had boasted they would be well received. +</p> +<p> +Like a wise and noble knight, he did not show what he felt in his heart, +but with a calm countenance said to his comrades, +</p> +<p> +"Gentlemen, pardon me that I have lured you with false hopes. I did not +believe that the ladies of this part of the country were so wanting in +courtesy as to refuse a lodging to wandering knights. But have a little +patience. I promise you on my word, to take you somewhere—not far from +here—where we shall have quite a different welcome." +</p> +<p> +"Forward then!" said all the others. "May God give us good luck." +</p> +<p> +They set off, under the direction of their guide, to take them to the +house of the lady by whom he was esteemed, though he did not return her +affection as he ought to have done; but now he determined to devote to +her the love which had been so roughly refused by his first mistress, +and he determined to love, serve, and obey her who loved him so, and +with whom, please God, he would soon be. +</p> +<p> +To shorten the story, after riding for a good hour and a half with the +drenching rain on their backs, they came to the house of the lady who +has previously being mentioned, and gaily knocked at the door, for it +was very late,—between nine and ten o'clock at night, and they much +feared that all the household would be in bed. Varlets and servant maids +at once came forth, and asked, "Who is there?" and they were told. +</p> +<p> +They went at once to their mistress, who was then in her petticoat, and +had put on her nightcap, and said, +</p> +<p> +"Madame, my lord so-and-so is at the gate and would fain enter; and with +him certain knights and squires of the Court to the number of three." +</p> +<p> +"They are very welcome," she said. "Up quickly, all of you! Kill some +capons and fowls, and let us have a good supper, and quickly." +</p> +<p> +In short, she gave her orders like the great lady that she was—and +still is,—and all obeyed her commands. She quickly put on her +night-dress, and thus attired, came forward, as courteously as possible, +to meet the gentlemen, with two torches carried before her, and only +accompanied by one waiting woman, and her beautiful daughter—all the +other women being employed in preparing the chambers. +</p> +<p> +She met her guests upon the drawbridge of the castle, and the noble +knight who was the guide and spokesman of the others, came forward and +expressed his gratitude for her kindness, and kissed her, and all the +others did the same after him. +</p> +<p> +Then like a courteous woman of the world, she said to the lords, +</p> +<p> +"Gentlemen, you are very welcome. Monseigneur So-and-so (that is to say +their guide) I have known a long time. He is very welcome here, and I +should be glad to make the acquaintance of you other gentlemen." +</p> +<p> +These introductions were made, the supper was soon ready, and each of +the gentlemen lodged in a fair and fine chamber, well appointed and +furnished with hangings and everything necessary. +</p> +<p> +It should be mentioned also, that whilst supper was preparing, the lady +and the good knight had a long talk together, and arranged that they +would only require one bed between them that night; her husband by good +luck not being in the house, but forty leagues away. +</p> +<p> +We will leave them enjoying their supper after the adventures of the +day, and return to the lady who refused to receive the little band, even +the man whom she knew loved her better than anyone else in the world, +and had shown herself so discourteous. +</p> +<p> +She asked her servants, when they returned from delivering her message, +what the knight had said? +</p> +<p> +One of them replied: "Madame he said very little; only that he would +take his friends to a place where they would have a hearty welcome and +good cheer." +</p> +<p> +She quickly guessed where they had gone, and said to herself, "Ah, he +has gone to the house of such an one, who, I know, will not be sorry to +see him, and no doubt they are now plotting against me." +</p> +<p> +Whilst she was thinking thus, the harshness and un-kindness which she +had felt towards her faithful lover, melted away or was transformed into +hearty affection and good-will, and she longed to bestow upon her +lover whatever he might ask or require. So she at once set to work and +suspecting that the lady to whom they had gone was now enjoying the +society of the man she had treated so rudely, she penned a letter to +her lover, most of the lines of which were written in her most precious +blood, to the effect that as soon as he saw this letter, he should set +all other matters aside, and follow the bearer of the missive, and he +would be so kindly received that no lover in the world could expect more +from his mistress. And as a token of her truth, she placed inside the +letter a diamond ring he well knew. +</p> +<p> +The bearer of this missive, who was a trustworthy man, went to the +castle where the knight was sitting at supper next to the hostess, and +with all the guests seated round the table. As soon as grace had been +said, the messenger drew the knight aside and handed him the letter. +</p> +<p> +Having perused it, the good knight was much amazed, and still more +joyous, for though he had determined in his own mind no longer to seek +the love or acquaintance of the writer of the letter, he still felt +tempted when the letter promised him that which he most desired in the +world. +</p> +<p> +He took his hostess aside, and told her that his master had sent an +urgent message, and that he must leave at once—at which he pretended +to feel much vexed,—and she, who had before been so joyful in the +expectation of that she so much desired, became sad and sorrowful. +</p> +<p> +He quietly mounted his horse, and leaving all his comrades behind, +arrived with the messenger, soon after midnight, at the castle of the +lady, but her husband had just arrived from Court and was then preparing +to go to bed, and she, who had sent specially to fetch her lover, was +disappointed enough, God knows. +</p> +<p> +The good knight, who had been all day in the saddle, either hunting the +hare or seeking for lodgings, heard at the door that the lady's husband +had arrived, and you may guess how joyful he was at the news. +</p> +<p> +He asked his guide what was to be done? They consulted together, and it +was decided that he should pretend to have lost his companions, and, by +good chance, met this messenger, who had brought him to the castle. This +being arranged, he was brought before my lord and my lady, and acted his +part as he well knew how. After having quaffed a cup of wine—which did +him very little good—he was led to his bed-chamber, where he scarcely +slept all night, and, early the next morning, returned with his host to +Court, without having tasted any of the delights which were promised him +in the letter. +</p> +<p> +And I may add that he was never able to return there again, for soon +afterwards the Court left that part of the country, and he went with it, +and soon forgot all about the lady—as often happens. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="2H_4_0082"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="82pg (137K)" src="images/82pg.jpg" height="928" width="593" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE EIGHTY-SECOND — BEYOND THE MARK. <a href="#note-82" name="noteref-82">82</a> +</h2> +<h3> + By Monseigneur De Lannoy. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a shepherd who made an agreement with a shepherdess that he should +mount upon her "in order that he might see farther," but was not to +penetrate beyond a mark which she herself made with her hand upon the +instrument of the said shepherd—as will more plainly appear hereafter.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +Listen, if you please, to what happened, near Lille, to a shepherd and +young shepherdess who tended their flocks together, or near each other. +</p> +<p> +Nature had already stirred in them, and they were of an age to know "the +way of the world", so one day an agreement was made between them +that the shepherd should mount on the shepherdess "in order to see +farther",—provided, however, that he should not penetrate beyond a +mark which she made with her hand upon the natural instrument of the +shepherd, and which was about two fingers' breadth below the head; and +the mark was made with a blackberry taken from the hedge. +</p> +<p> +That being done, they began God's work, and the shepherd pushed in as +though it had cost him no trouble, and without thinking about any mark +or sign, or the promise he had made to the shepherdess, for all that he +had he buried up to the hilt, and if he had had more he would have found +a place to put it. +</p> +<p> +The pretty shepherdess, who had never had such a wedding, enjoyed +herself so much that she would willingly have done nothing else all her +life. The battle being ended, both went to look after their sheep, which +had meanwhile strayed some distance. They being brought together again, +the shepherd, who was called Hacquin, to pass the time, sat in a swing +set up between two hedges, and there he swung, as happy as a king. +</p> +<p> +The shepherdess sat by the side of a ditch, and made a wreath of +flowers. She sang a little song, hoping that it would attract the +shepherd, and he would begin the game over again—but that was very far +from his thoughts. When she found he did not come, she began to call, +"Hacquin! Hacquin!" +</p> +<p> +And he replied, "What do you want?" +</p> +<p> +"Come here! come here! will you?" she said. +</p> +<p> +But Hacquin had had a surfeit of pleasure and he replied; +</p> +<p> +"In God's name leave me alone. I am doing nothing; and enjoying myself." +</p> +<p> +Then the shepherdess cried; +</p> +<p> +"Come here, Hacquin; I will let you go in further, without making any +mark." +</p> +<p> +"By St. John," said Hacquin, "I went far beyond the mark, and I do not +want any more." +</p> +<p> +He would not go to the shepherdess, who was much vexed to have to remain +idle. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="image-0047"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/83.jpg" height="900" width="633" +alt="83.jpg" title="The Gluttonous Monk. +"> +</center> + +<a name="2H_4_0083"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="83pg (134K)" src="images/83pg.jpg" height="931" width="588" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE EIGHTY-THIRD — THE GLUTTONOUS MONK. +</h2> +<h3> + By Monseigneur De Vaurin. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a Carmelite monk who came to preach at a village and after his +sermon, he went to dine with a lady, and how he stuffed out his gown, as +you will hear.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +It is the custom of all countries for religious mendicants—Jacobins, +Cordeliers, Carmelites, and Augustinians—to go through all the towns +and villages, preaching against vice, and exalting and praising virtue. +</p> +<p> +It happened once that a Carmelite, from the convent of Arras, arrived +one Sunday morning, at Libers, a pretty, little town of Artois, to +preach—which he could do piously and eloquently, for he was a learned +man and a good orator. +</p> +<p> +Whilst the curé was chanting high Mass, our Carmelite wandered about, +hoping to find some one who wanted a Mass said, whereby the monk could +earn a few pence, but no one came forward. +</p> +<p> +Seeing this, an old widow lady took compassion on him, allowed him to +say a Mass, and then sent her servant to give him two <i>patars</i>, and to +beg him to come to dinner with her that day. +</p> +<p> +Master monk snapped up the money, and accepted the invitation, and as +soon as he had preached his sermon, and high Mass was finished, he came. +</p> +<p> +The lady for whom he had said Mass, and who had invited him, left the +church with her maid, and went home to make all ready for the preacher, +who was conducted to the house by one of her servants, and most +courteously received. After he had washed his hands, the lady assigned +him a place by her side, and the varlet and the maid-servant prepared to +serve the repast, and first they brought in leek soup, with a good piece +of bacon, a dish of pig's chitterlings, and an ox tongue, roasted. +</p> +<p> +God knows that as soon as the monk saw the viands he drew forth from +his girdle a fine, long, large, and very sharp knife, and, as he said +<i>Benedicite</i>, he set to work in the leek soup. +</p> +<p> +Very soon he had finished that and the bacon as well, and drew towards +him the fine, fat chitterlings, and rioted amongst them like a wolf +amongst a flock of sheep; and before his hostess had half finished her +soup there was not the ghost of a chitterling left in the dish. Then he +took the ox tongue, and with his sharp knife cut off so many slices that +not a morsel remained. +</p> +<p> +The lady, who watched all this without saying a word, often glanced at +the varlet and the servant-maid, and they smiled quietly and glanced at +her. Then they brought a piece of good salt beef, and a capital piece +of mutton, and put them on the table. And the good monk, who had an +appetite like a hungry dog, attacked the beef, and if he had had little +pity for the chitterlings and the ox tongue, still less had he for this +fine piece of larded beef. +</p> +<p> +His hostess who took great pleasure in seeing him eat—which was more +than the varlet and the maid, did for they cursed him beneath their +breath—always filled his cup as soon as it was empty; and you may guess +that if he did not spare the meat neither did he spare the drink. +</p> +<p> +He was in such a hurry to line his gown that he would hardly say a word. +When the beef was all finished, and great part of the mutton—of which +his hostess had scarcely eaten a mouthful—she, seeing that her guest +was not yet satisfied, made a sign to the servant-maid to bring a huge +ham which had been cooked the day before for the household. +</p> +<p> +The maid—cursing the priest for gorging so—obeyed the order of her +mistress, and put the ham on the table. The good monk, without staying +to ask "who goes there", fell upon it tooth and nail, and at the very +first attack he carried off the knuckle, then the thick end, and so +dismembered it that soon there was nothing left but the bone. +</p> +<p> +The serving man and woman did not laugh much at this, for he had +entirely cleared the larder, and they were half afraid that he would eat +them as well. +</p> +<p> +To shorten the story—after all these before mentioned dishes, the lady +caused to be placed on the table a fine fat cheese, and a dish well +furnished with tarts, apples, and cheeses, with a good piece of fresh +butter—of all which there was not a scrap left to take away. +</p> +<p> +The dinner which has been described being thus finished, our preacher, +who was now as round as a tick, pronounced grace, and then said to his +hostess; +</p> +<p> +"Damsel, I thank you for your good gifts; you have given me a hearty +welcome, for which I am much obliged to you. I will pray to Him who +fed five thousand men with a few loaves of barley bread and two small +fishes, and after they were all filled there remained over twelve +basketfuls—I will pray to Him to reward you." +</p> +<p> +"By St. John!" said the maid-servant coming forward, "you may well talk +about that. I believe that if you had been one of that multitude there +would not have been anything left over; for you would have eaten up +everything, and me into the bargain, if I had happened to have been +there." +</p> +<p> +"No, truly, my dear," replied the monk, who was a jovial fellow with a +ready wit, "I should not have eaten you, but I should have spitted you, +and put you down to roast—that is what I should have done to you." +</p> +<p> +The lady began to laugh, and so did the varlet and the maid-servant, in +spite of themselves. And our monk, who had his belly well stuffed, +again thanked his hostess for having so well filled him, and went off to +another village to earn his supper—but whether that was as good as his +dinner I cannot say. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="image-0048"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/84.jpg" height="914" width="614" +alt="84.jpg" title="The Devil's Share. +"> +</center> + +<a name="2H_4_0084"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="84pg (123K)" src="images/84pg.jpg" height="958" width="587" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE EIGHTY-FOURTH — THE DEVIL'S SHARE. <a href="#note-84" name="noteref-84">84</a> +</h2> +<h3> + By The Marquis De Rothelin. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of one of his marshals who married the sweetest and most lovable woman +there was in all Germany. Whether what I tell you is true—for I do +not swear to it that I may not be considered a liar—you will see more +plainly below.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +Whilst we are waiting tor some one to come forward and tell us a good +story, I will relate a little one which will not detain you long, but is +quite true, and happened lately. +</p> +<p> +I had a marshal, who had served me long and faithfully, and who +determined to get a wife, and was married to the most ill-tempered woman +in all the country; and when he found that neither by good means or bad +could he cure her of her evil temper, he left her, and would not live +with her, but avoided her as he would a tempest, for if he knew she was +in any place he would go in the contrary direction. When she saw that +he avoided her, and that he gave her no opportunity of displaying her +temper, she went in search of him, and followed him, crying God knows +what, whilst he held his tongue and pursued his road, and this only +made her worse and she bestowed more curses and maledictions on her poor +husband than a devil would on a damned soul. +</p> +<p> +One day she, finding that her husband did not reply a word to anything +she said, followed him through the street, crying as loud as she could +before all the people; +</p> +<p> +"Come here, traitor! speak to me. I belong to you. I belong to you!" +</p> +<p> +And my marshal replied each time; "I give my share to the devil! I give +my share to the devil." +</p> +<p> +Thus they went all through the town of Lille, she crying all the while +"I belong to you," and the other replying "I give my share to the +devil." +</p> +<p> +Soon afterwards, so God willed, this good woman died, and my marshal was +asked if he were much grieved at the loss of his wife, and he replied +that never had such a piece of luck occurred to him, and if God had +promised him anything he might wish, he would have wished for his wife's +death; "for she," he said, "was so wicked and malicious that if I knew +she were in paradise I would not go there, for there could be no peace +in any place where she was. But I am sure that she is in hell, for never +did any created thing more resemble a devil than she did." Then they +said to him; +</p> +<p> +"Really you ought to marry again. You should look out for some good, +quiet, honest woman." +</p> +<p> +"Marry?" said he. "I would rather go and hang myself on a gibbet than +again run the danger of finding such a hell as I have—thank God—now +escaped from." +</p> +<p> +Thus he lived, and still lives—but I know not what he will be. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="2H_4_0085"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="85pg (134K)" src="images/85pg.jpg" height="940" width="607" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE EIGHTY-FIFTH — NAILED! <a href="#note-85" name="noteref-85">85</a> +</h2> +<h3> + By Monseigneur De Santilly. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a goldsmith, married to a fair, kind, and gracious lady, and very +amorous withal of a curé, her neighbour, with whom her husband found her +in bed, they being betrayed by one of the goldsmith's servants, who was +jealous, as you will hear.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +A hundred years ago, or thereabouts, there happened in a town on the +borders of France a curious incident, which I will relate, to increase +my number of stories, and also because it deserves to rank with the +others. +</p> +<p> +In this town there was a man whose wife was fair, kind, and gracious, +and much enamoured of a churchman, her own curé and near neighbour, who +loved her as much as she did him, but to find an opportunity to come +together amorously was difficult, but it was at last found by the +ingenuity of the lady, in the manner I will describe. +</p> +<p> +Her husband was a goldsmith, and so greedy of gain that he would never +sleep an hour in which he could work. +</p> +<p> +Every day he would rise an hour or two before dawn, and let his wife +take a long rest till eight or nine o'clock, or as long as she pleased. +</p> +<p> +This amorous dame seeing how diligent her husband was, and that he rose +early every day to hammer and work, determined to employ with the curé +the time during which she was neglected by her husband, and arranged +that at such and such an hour her lover could visit her without her +husband's knowledge, for the cure's house stood next to hers. +</p> +<p> +This happy expedient was proposed to the curé, who gladly accepted +it, for it seemed to him that his amour could be carried on easily and +secretly. So as soon as the proposal was made it was executed, and thus +they continued to live for a long time; but fortune—envious perhaps of +their happiness and sweet enjoyment—willed that their amours should be +unfortunately discovered in the manner you will hear. +</p> +<p> +This goldsmith had an assistant, who was in love with his master's wife, +and very jealous of her, and he perceived the curé often talking to the +lady, and he guessed what was the matter. But he could not imagine how +and when they met, unless it was that the curé came in the morning when +he and his master were in the workshop. These suspicions so ran in his +head that he watched and listened in order that he might find out the +truth, and he watched so well that he learned the facts of the case, for +one morning he saw the curé come, soon after the goldsmith had left the +chamber, and enter and close the door after him. +</p> +<p> +When he was quite sure that his suspicions were confirmed, he informed +his master of his discovery in these terms. +</p> +<p> +"Master, I serve you, not only that I may earn your money, eat your +bread, and do your work well and honestly, but also to protect your +honour and preserve it from harm. If I acted otherwise I should not be +worthy to be your servant. I have long had a suspicion that our curé was +doing you a grievous wrong, but I said nothing to you until I was sure +of the facts. That you may not suppose I am trumping up an idle story, I +would beg of you to let us go now to your chamber, for I am sure that we +shall find him there." +</p> +<p> +When the good man heard this news, he was much inclined to laugh, but he +agreed to go to his chamber along with his assistant—who first made +him promise that he would not kill the curé, or otherwise he would not +accompany him, but consented that the curé should be well punished. +</p> +<p> +They went up to the chamber, and the door was soon opened. The husband +entered first, and saw his wife in the arms of the curé who was forging +as hard as he could. +</p> +<p> +The goldsmith cried; +</p> +<p> +"Die, die, scoundrel! What brings you here?" +</p> +<p> +The curé was surprised and alarmed, and begged for mercy. +</p> +<p> +"Silence, rascally priest, or I will kill you on the spot!" +</p> +<p> +"Oh, neighbour have mercy, for God's sake," said the curé; "do with me +whatever you like." +</p> +<p> +"By my father's soul! before I let you go I will make you so that you +will never want to hammer on any feminine anvil again. Get up, and let +yourself be bound, unless you wish to die!" +</p> +<p> +The poor wretch allowed himself to be fastened by his two enemies to a +bench, face upwards, and with his legs hanging down on each side of the +bench. When he was well fastened, so that he could move nothing but +his head, he was carried thus trussed (*) into a little shed behind the +house, which the goldsmith used as a melting-room. +</p> +<pre> + (*) The word in the original is <i>marescaucié</i>, which + presumably means,—treated as the soldiers of the + <i>maréchaussée</i> treated their prisoners. Bibliophile Jacob + avoided philological pitfalls of this sort by omitting the + phrase altogether. +</pre> +<p> +When the curé was safely placed in this shed, the goldsmith sent for two +long nails with large heads, and with these he fastened to the bench +the two hammers which had in his absence forged on his wife's anvil, +and after that undid all the ropes which fastened the poor wretch. Then +taking a handful of straw, he set fire to the shed, and leaving the curé +to his fate, rushed into the street, crying "Fire!" +</p> +<p> +The priest, finding himself surrounded by flames, saw that he must +either lose his genitals or be burned alive, so he jumped up and ran +away, leaving his purse nailed there. +</p> +<p> +An alarm was soon raised in the street, and the neighbours ran to put +out the fire. But the curé sent them back, saying that he had just come +from the spot, and all the harm that could occur had already been done, +so that they could give no assistance—but he did not say that it was he +who had suffered all the harm. +</p> +<p> +Thus was the poor curé rewarded for his love, through the false and +treacherous jealousy of the goldsmith's assistant, as you have heard. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="image-0049"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/86.jpg" height="884" width="613" +alt="86.jpg" title=" Foolish Fear. +"> +</center> + +<a name="2H_4_0086"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="86pg (131K)" src="images/86pg.jpg" height="944" width="590" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE EIGHTY-SIXTH — FOOLISH FEAR. +</h2> +<h3> + By Monseigneur Philippe Vignier. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a young man of Rouen, married to a fair, young girl of the age of +fifteen or thereabouts; and how the mother of the girl wished to have +the marriage annulled by the Judge of Rouen, and of the sentence which +the said Judge pronounced when he had heard the parties—as you will +hear more plainly in the course of the said story.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +In the good town of Rouen, not long ago, a young man was married to a +fair and tender virgin, aged fifteen, or thereabouts. On the day of the +great feast—that is to say, the wedding—the mother of the young girl, +as is customary in such cases, instructed the bride in all the mysteries +of wedlock, and taught her how to behave to her husband on the first +night. +</p> +<p> +The young girl, who was looking forward to the time when she could put +these doctrines into practice, took great pains and trouble to remember +the lesson given her by her good mother, and it seemed to her that when +the time came for her to put these counsels into execution, that she +would perform her duties so well that her husband would praise her, and +be well pleased with her. +</p> +<p> +The wedding was performed with all honour and due solemnity, and the +desired night came; and soon after the feast was ended, and the young +people had withdrawn after having taken leave of the newly married +couple,—the mother, cousins, neighbours, and other lady friends led +the bride to the chamber where she was to spend the night with her +husband, where they joyfully divested her of her raiment, and put her to +bed, as was right and proper. Then they wished her good-night, and one +said; +</p> +<p> +"My dear, may God give you joy and pleasure in your husband, and may you +so live with him as to be for the salvation of both your souls." +</p> +<p> +Another said: "My dear, God give you such peace and happiness with your +husband, that the heavens may be filled with your works." +</p> +<p> +After they all had expressed similar wishes, they left. The bride's +mother, who remained the last, questioned her daughter to see whether +she remembered the lesson she had been taught. And the girl, who, as the +proverb goes, did not carry her tongue in her pocket, replied that +she well remembered all that had been told her, and—thank God—had +forgotten nothing. +</p> +<p> +"Well done," said the mother. "Now I will leave you, and recommend +you to God, and pray that He may give you good luck. Farewell, my dear +child." +</p> +<p> +"Farewell, my good and wise mother." +</p> +<p> +As soon as the schoolmistress had finished, the husband who was outside +the door expecting something better, came in. The mother closed the +door, and told him that she hoped he would be gentle with her daughter. +He promised that he would, and as soon as he had bolted the door, +he—who had on nothing on but his doublet,—threw it off, jumped on +the bed, drew as close as he could to his bride, and, lance in hand, +prepared to give battle. +</p> +<p> +But when he approached the barrier where the skirmish was to take place, +the girl laid hold of his lance, which was as straight and stiff as a +cowkeeper's horn, and when she felt how hard and big it was, she was +very frightened, and began to cry aloud, and said that her shield was +not strong enough to receive and bear the blows of such a huge weapon. +</p> +<p> +Do all he would, the husband could not persuade her to joust with +him, and this bickering lasted all night, without his being able to do +anything, which much displeased our bridegroom. Nevertheless, he was +patient, hoping to make up for lost time the next night, but it was +the same as the first night, and so was the third, and so on up to the +fifteenth, matters remaining just as I have told you. +</p> +<p> +When fifteen days had passed since the young couple had been married, +and they had still not come together, the mother came to visit her +pupil, and after a thousand questions, spoke to the girl of her husband, +and asked what sort of man he was, and whether he did his duty well? And +the girl said that he was a nice, young man, quiet and peaceable. +</p> +<p> +"But," said the mother; "does he do what he ought to do?" +</p> +<p> +"Yes," said the girl, "but——-" +</p> +<p> +"But <i>what?</i>" said the mother. "You are keeping something back I am +sure. Tell me at once, and conceal nothing; for I must know now. Is he a +man capable of performing his marital duties in the way I taught you?" +</p> +<p> +The poor girl, being thus pressed, was obliged to own that he had not +yet done the business, but she did not say that she was the cause of the +delay, and that she had always refused the combat. +</p> +<p> +When her mother heard this sad news, God knows what a disturbance she +made, swearing by all her gods that she would soon find a remedy for +that, for she was well acquainted with the judge of Rouen, who was her +friend, and would favour her cause. +</p> +<p> +"The marriage must be annulled," she said, "and I have no doubt that I +shall be able to find out the way, and you may be sure, my child, that +before two days are over you will be divorced and married to another man +who will not let you rest in peace all that time. You leave the matter +to me." +</p> +<p> +The good woman, half beside herself, went and related her wrong to her +husband, the father of the girl, and told him that they had lost their +daughter, and adducing many reasons why the marriage should be annulled. +</p> +<p> +She pleaded her cause so well that her husband took her side, and was +content that the bridegroom, (who knew no reason why a complaint should +be lodged against him) should be cited before the Judge. But, at any +rate, he was personally summoned to appear before the Judge, at his +wife's demand, to show cause why he should not leave her, and permit her +to marry again, or explain the reasons why, in so many days that he had +lived with her, he had not demonstrated that he was a man, and performed +the duties that a husband should. +</p> +<p> +When the day came, the parties presented themselves at the proper time +and place, and they were called upon to state their case. The mother of +the bride began to plead her daughter's cause, and God knows the laws +concerning marriage which she quoted, none of which, she maintained, +had her son-in-law fulfilled; therefore she demanded that he should be +divorced from her daughter at once without any more ado. +</p> +<p> +The young man was much astonished to find himself thus attacked, but +lost no time in replying to the allegations of his adversary, and +quietly stated his case, and related how his wife had always refused to +allow him to perform his marital duties. +</p> +<p> +The mother, when she heard this reply, was more angry than ever, and +would hardly believe it, and asked her daughter if that was true which +her husband had said? +</p> +<p> +"Yes, truly, mother," she replied. +</p> +<p> +"Oh, wretched girl," said her mother, "why did you refuse? Did I not +teach you your lesson many times?" +</p> +<p> +The poor girl could not reply, so ashamed was she. +</p> +<p> +"At any rate," said her mother, "I must know the reason why you have +refused. Tell it me at once, or I shall be horrible angry." +</p> +<p> +The girl was obliged to confess that she had found the lance of the +champion so big that she had not dared to present her shield, fearing +that he would kill her; and so she still felt, and was not re-assured +upon that point, although her mother had told her not be afraid. After +this the mother addressed the Judge, and said: +</p> +<p> +"Monseigneur, you have heard the confession of my daughter, and the +defence of my son-in-law. I beg of you to give judgment at once." +</p> +<p> +The judge ordered a bed to be prepared in his house, and the couple to +lie on it together, and commanded the bride to boldly lay hold of the +stick or instrument, and put it where it was ordered to go. When this +judgment was given, the mother said; +</p> +<p> +"Thank you, my lord; you have well judged. Come along, my child, do what +you should, and take care not to disobey the judge, and put the lance +where it ought to be put." +</p> +<p> +"I am satisfied," said the daughter, "to put it where it ought to go, +but it may rot there before I will take it out again." +</p> +<p> +So they left the Court, and went and carried out the sentence +themselves, without the aid of any sergeants. By this means the young +man enjoyed his joust, and was sooner sick of it than she who would not +begin. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="2H_4_0087"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="87pg (139K)" src="images/87pg.jpg" height="943" width="600" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE EIGHTY-SEVENTH — WHAT THE EYE DOES NOT SEE. +</h2> +<h3> + By Monsieur Le Voyer. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a gentle knight who was enamoured of a young and beautiful girl, +and how he caught a malady in one of his eyes, and therefore sent for a +doctor, who likewise fell in love with the same girl, as you will +hear; and of the words which passed between the knight and the doctor +concerning the plaster which the doctor had put on the knight's good +eye.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +In the pleasant and fertile land of Holland, not a hundred years ago, a +noble knight lodged in a fair and good inn, where there was a young and +very pretty chamber-maid, with whom he was greatly enamoured, and for +love of her had arranged with the Duke of Burgundy's quartermaster that +he should be lodged in this inn, in order that he might better carry out +his intentions with regard to this girl. +</p> +<p> +After he had been at this inn five or six days, there happened to him a +misfortune, for he had a disease in one of his eyes so that he could not +keep it open, so sharp was the pain. And as he much feared to lose it, +and it was an organ that required much care and attention, he sent for +the Duke's surgeon, who was at that time in the the town. And you must +know that the said surgeon was a good fellow, and much esteemed and +spoken about throughout all the country. +</p> +<p> +As soon as the surgeon saw this eye, he declared that it could not be +saved, which is what they customarily say, so that if they do cure the +disease they may gain more praise and profit. +</p> +<p> +The good knight was greatly vexed at this news, and asked if there were +no means of cure, and the other replied that it would be very difficult, +nevertheless he might, with God's aid, cure it, if the knight would obey +all his instructions. +</p> +<p> +"If you can cure me and save my eye," said the knight, "I will pay you +well." +</p> +<p> +The bargain was made, and the surgeon undertook with God's aid to cure +the bad eye, and arranged at what hour he would come every day to apply +the dressings. +</p> +<p> +You must know that every time the surgeon came to see his patient, the +pretty chambermaid accompanied him, to hold his box or basin, or help to +move the poor patient, who forgot half his pain in the presence of his +lady-love. +</p> +<p> +If the good knight had been struck by the beauty of the chambermaid, +so also was the surgeon; who, each time that he paid a visit, could not +help casting sheep's eyes at the fair face of the chambermaid, and at +last passionately declared his love, which was well received, for she +immediately granted his requests, but it was not easy to find means to +carry out their ardent desires. +</p> +<p> +At last, after some trouble, a plan was hit on by the prudent and +cunning surgeon, and it was this: +</p> +<p> +"I will tell my patient," he said, "that his eye cannot be cured unless +his other eye is bandaged, for by throwing all the work on the sound +eye he prevents the other from getting well. If he will allow it to be +bandaged up, we shall have a capital means of taking our pleasure, even +in his chamber, without his having any suspicion of it." +</p> +<p> +The girl, whose desires were quite as warm as those of the surgeon, was +quite agreeable, provided the plan could be carried out. +</p> +<p> +"We will try," said the surgeon. +</p> +<p> +He came at the usual hour to see the bad eye, and when he had uncovered +it, pretended to be much surprised. +</p> +<p> +"What!" he cried. "I never saw such a disease; the eye is worse than it +was fifteen days ago. You must have patience, monsieur." +</p> +<p> +"In what way?" said the knight. +</p> +<p> +"Your good eye must be bandaged and concealed, so that no light can +reach it, for an hour or so after I have applied this plaster and +ordered another—for, no doubt, it prevents the other from healing. +Ask," he said, "this pretty girl, who sees it every day, how it is +getting on." +</p> +<p> +The girl said that it looked worse than before. +</p> +<p> +"Well," said the knight, "I leave myself in your hands; do with me +whatever you please. I am content to be blindfolded as much as you like, +provided I am cured in the long run." +</p> +<p> +The two lovers were very joyful when they saw that the knight allowed +his eyes to be bandaged. When all the arrangements had been made, and +the knight had his eyes bandaged, master surgeon pretended to leave as +usual, promising to come back soon to take off the bandage. +</p> +<p> +He did not go very far, for he threw the girl on a couch not far from +the patient, and with quite a different instrument to that which he had +employed on the knight, visited the secret cloisters of the chambermaid. +</p> +<p> +Three, four, five, six times did he perform on the pretty girl without +the knight noticing it, for though he heard the storm he did not know +what it was; but as it still continued, his suspicions were aroused, +and this time, when he heard the noise of the combat, he tore off +the bandages and plasters and threw them away, and saw the two lovers +struggling together, and seeming as though they would eat each other, so +closely united were their mouths. +</p> +<p> +"What is this, master surgeon?" cried he. "Have you blindfolded me in +order to do me this wrong. Is my eye to be cured by this means? Tell +me—did you prepare this trick for me? By St. John, I suspect I was more +often visited for love of my chambermaid than for my eyes. Well! well! +I am in your hands now, sir, and cannot yet revenge myself, but the day +will come when I will make you remember me." +</p> +<p> +The surgeon, who was a thoroughly good fellow, began to laugh, and made +his peace with the knight, and I believe that, after the eye was cured, +they agreed to divide the work between them. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="image-0050"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/88.jpg" height="875" width="632" +alt="88.jpg" title="A Husband in Hiding. +"> +</center> + +<a name="2H_4_0088"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="88pg (140K)" src="images/88pg.jpg" height="964" width="598" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE EIGHTY-EIGHTH — A HUSBAND IN HIDING. <a href="#note-88" name="noteref-88">88</a> +</h2> +<h3> + By Alardin. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a poor, simple peasant married to a nice, pleasant woman, who did +much as she liked, and who in order that she might be alone with her +lover, shut up her husband in the pigeon-house in the manner you will +hear.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +In a pretty, little town near here, but which I will not name, there +recently occurred an incident which will furnish a short story. There +lived there a good, simple, unlettered peasant, married to a nice, +pleasant woman, and as long as he had plenty to eat and drink he cared +for little else. He was accustomed to often go into the country to +a house he had there, and stay, three, or four days—sometimes more, +sometimes less, as suited his pleasure, and left his wife to enjoy +herself in the town, which she did, for, in order that she might not be +frightened, she had always a man to take her husband's place, and look +after the workshop and see that the tools did not rust. Her method was +to wait until her husband was out of sight, and not until she was quite +sure that he would not return did she send for his deputy, in order that +she might not be surprised. +</p> +<p> +But she could not always manage so well as not to be surprised, for once +when her husband had remained away two or three days, and on the fourth +day she had waited as long as possible until the gates of the town were +closed; thinking he would not come that day, she closed the doors and +the windows as on the other days, brought her lover into the house, and +they began to drink and enjoy themselves. +</p> +<p> +They were scarcely seated at the table, when her husband came and +thundered at the door, which he was much surprised to find closed. +</p> +<p> +When the good woman heard it, she hid her lover under the bed; then went +to the door and demanded who knocked? +</p> +<p> +"Open the door," replied her husband. +</p> +<p> +"Ah, husband, is that you?" she said. "I was going to send a message to +you to-morrow morning to tell you not to come back." +</p> +<p> +"Why; what is the matter?" asked her husband. +</p> +<p> +"What is the matter? God in heaven!" she replied. "The sergeants were +here two hours and a half, waiting to take you to prison." +</p> +<p> +"To prison!" said he; "Why to prison? Have I done anything wrong? To +whom do I owe any money? Who brings any charge against me?" +</p> +<p> +"I know nothing about it," said the cunning wench, "but they evidently +wanted to do you harm." +</p> +<p> +"But did they not tell you," asked her husband, "why they wanted me?" +</p> +<p> +"No," she replied; "nothing, except that if they laid hands on you, you +would not get out of prison for a long time." +</p> +<p> +"Thank God they haven't caught me yet. Good bye, I am going back." +</p> +<p> +"Where are you going?" she asked—though she was glad to get rid of him. +</p> +<p> +"Whence I came," he replied. +</p> +<p> +"I will come with you," she said. +</p> +<p> +"No, don't. Stay and take care of the house, and do not tell anyone that +I have been here." +</p> +<p> +"Since you will return to the country," she said, "make haste and get +away before they close the gates: it is already late." +</p> +<p> +"If they should be shut, the gate-keeper will do anything for me and he +will open them again." +</p> +<p> +With these words he left, and when he came to the gate, he found it +closed, and, beg and pray as he might, the gate-keeper would not open it +for him. +</p> +<p> +He was very annoyed that he should have to return to his house, for he +feared the sergeants; nevertheless, he was obliged to go back, or sleep +in the streets. +</p> +<p> +He went back, and knocked at the door, and the woman who had again sat +down with her lover, was much surprised, but she jumped up, and ran to +the door, and called out, +</p> +<p> +"My husband has not come back; you are wasting your time." +</p> +<p> +"Open the door, my dear," said the good man. "I am here." +</p> +<p> +"Alas! alas! the gate was closed: I feared as much," she said. "You will +certainly be arrested; I see no hope for escape, for the sergeants told +me, I now remember, that they would return to-night." +</p> +<p> +"Oh, well," he said, "there is no need of a long sermon. Let us consider +what is to be done." +</p> +<p> +"You must hide somewhere in the house," she said, "and I do not know of +any place where you would be safe." +</p> +<p> +"Should I be safe," he asked, "in our pigeon house? Who would look for +me there?" +</p> +<p> +She was, of course, highly delighted at the suggestion, but pretended +not to be, and said; "It is not a very nice place; it stinks too much." +</p> +<p> +"I don't mind that," he said. "I would rather be there an hour or two, +and be safe, than be in a better place and be caught." +</p> +<p> +"Oh, well, if you are brave enough to go there, I am of your opinion +that it would be a good hiding-place." +</p> +<p> +The poor man ascended into the pigeon-house, which fastened outside, +and was locked in, and told his wife that if the sergeants did not come +soon, that she was to let him out. +</p> +<p> +She left him to coo with the pigeons all night, which he did not much +like, and he was afraid to speak or call, for fear of the sergeants. +</p> +<p> +At daybreak, which was the time when her lover left the house, the good +woman came and called her husband and opened the door; and he asked her +why she had left him so long along with the pigeons. And she, having +prepared her reply, said that the sergeants had watched round their +house all night, and spoken to her several times, and had only just +gone, but they said that they would come back at a time when they were +likely to find him. +</p> +<p> +The poor fellow, much wondering what the sergeants could want with him, +left at once, and returned to the country, vowing that he would not +come back for a long time. God knows how pleased the wench was at +this, though she pretended to be grieved. And by this means she enjoyed +herself more than ever, for she had no longer any dread of her husband's +return. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="2H_4_0089"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="89pg (144K)" src="images/89pg.jpg" height="956" width="582" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE EIGHTY-NINTH — THE FAULT OF THE ALMANAC. +</h2> +<h3> + By Poncelet. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a curé who forgot, either by negligence or ignorance, to inform his +parishioners that Lent had come until Palm Sunday arrived, as you +will hear—and of the manner in which he excused himself to his +parishioners.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +In a certain little hamlet or village in this country, far from any good +town, there happened an incident, which is worth hearing, my good sirs. +</p> +<p> +This village or hamlet was inhabited by a handful of rough and simple +peasants, who knew nothing except how to gain their livelihood. Rough +and ignorant as they were, their curé was not less so, for he did not +know things of common knowledge, as I will show you by relating an +incident that happened to him. +</p> +<p> +You must know that this curé was so simple and ignorant that he could +not announce the feasts of the saints, which come every year on a fixed +day, as every one knows; and when his parishioners asked when such and +such a feast would fall, he could not, right off, answer them correctly. +</p> +<p> +Amongst other such mistakes, which often occurred, he made one which +was by no means slight, for he allowed the five weeks of Lent to slip by +without informing his parishioners. +</p> +<p> +But hear how he discovered his error. On the Saturday which was the eve +before Palm Sunday, he had need to go to the nearest town for something +that he required. When he had entered the town, and was riding along +the streets, he saw that the priests were purchasing palms and other +greenstuff, which were being sold at the market for the procession the +next day. +</p> +<p> +If anyone was astonished it was our good curé, though he pretended not +to be. He went to the woman who sold the palms and boughs, and bought +some—pretending that he had come to town specially for that purpose. +Then he hastily mounted his horse, which was loaded with his purchases, +galloped to the village, and arrived there as quickly as possible. +</p> +<p> +As soon as he had dismounted, he met several of his parishioners, whom +he commanded to go and ring the bells for every one to come to church +at once, for he had certain things necessary for the salvation of their +souls to tell them. +</p> +<p> +A meeting was soon called, and all were assembled in the church, where +the curé, booted and spurred, came, much flustered, God knows. He +mounted into the pupil, and said the following words, +</p> +<p> +"Good sirs, I have to signify and inform you that to-day was the eve of +the solemn feast of Palm Sunday, and this day next week will be the eve +of Easter Sunday, the day of Our Lord's Resurrection." +</p> +<p> +When these good people heard this news they began to murmur, and were so +astonished they did not know what to do. +</p> +<p> +"Silence!" said the curé, "I will soon satisfy you, and will tell +you the true reasons why you have only eight days of Lent in which to +perform your penitences this year, and marvel not at what I am about +to tell you, as to why Lent came so late. I suppose there is not one +amongst you who does not know and remember that the frosts were very +long and sharp this year—much worse than ever they were—and that for +many weeks it was dangerous to ride, on account of the frost and the +snow, which lasted a long time." +</p> +<p> +"Every one here knows that is as true as the Gospel, therefore be not +astonished that Lent has been so long coming, but rather wonder that it +was able to come at all, seeing how long the road is from here to his +house. I would ask, and even beg of you, to excuse him, for I dined with +him to day" (and he named the place—that is to say the town to which he +had been). +</p> +<p> +"However," he added, "manage to come and confess this week, and appear +to morrow in the procession, as is customary. And have patience this +time; the coming year will be milder, please God, and then Lent will +come quicker, as it usually does." +</p> +<p> +Thus did the curé find means to excuse his simple ignorance. Then he +pronounced the benediction saying, +</p> +<p> +"Pray to God for me, and I will pray to God for you." +</p> +<p> +After that he came down out of the pulpit, and went to his house to +prepare the boughs and palms which were to be used in the procession the +next day. +</p> +<p> +And that is all. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="image-0051"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/90.jpg" height="881" width="616" +alt="90.jpg" title="A Good Remedy. +"> +</center> + +<a name="2H_4_0090"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="90pg (139K)" src="images/90pg.jpg" height="959" width="592" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE NINETIETH — A GOOD REMEDY. <a href="#note-90" name="noteref-90">90</a> +</h2> +<h3> + By Monseigneur De Beaumont. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a good merchant of Brabant whose wife was very ill, and he supposing +that she was about to die, after many remonstrances and exhortations for +the salvation of her soul, asked her pardon, and she pardoned him all +his misdeeds, excepting that he had not worked her as much as he ought +to have done—as will appear more plainly in the said story.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +To increase the number of stories that I promised to tell, I will relate +a circumstance that occurred lately. +</p> +<p> +In the fair land of Brabant—the place in the world where adventures +most often happen—there lived a good and honest merchant, whose +wife was very ill, and had to keep her bed continually because of her +disease. +</p> +<p> +The good man, seeing his wife so ill and weak, led a sad life; he was so +vexed and distressed and he much feared she would die. In this state +of grief, and believing that he was about to lose her, he came to her +bedside, and gave her hopes of being cured, and comforted her as best +he could. And after that he had talked with her a little time, and ended +his admonitions and exhortations, he begged her pardon, and requested +that if he had ever wronged her in any way that she would pardon him. +</p> +<p> +Amongst other instances of things which he knew had annoyed her, he +mentioned that he had not polished up her armour (that part which is +called the <i>cuirass</i>) as often as she would have liked, and therefore he +humbly begged her pardon. +</p> +<p> +The poor invalid, as soon as she could speak, pardoned him all his minor +offences, but this last she would not willingly pardon without knowing +the reasons which had induced her husband to neglect polishing up her +armour when he knew well what a pleasure it was to her, and that she +asked for nothing better. +</p> +<p> +"What?" he said; "Will you die without pardoning those who have done you +wrong?" +</p> +<p> +"I do not mind pardoning you," she said, "but I want to know your +reasons—otherwise I will not pardon you." +</p> +<p> +The good husband thought he had hit on a good excuse, and one that would +obtain his pardon, and replied; +</p> +<p> +"My dear, you know that very often you were ill and weak—although not +so ill as I see you now—and I did not dare to challenge you to combat +whilst you were in that condition, fearing that it might make you worse. +But be sure that if I refrained from embracing you, it was only out of +love and affection to you." +</p> +<p> +"Hold your tongue, liar that you are! I was never so ill and weak that +I should have refused the battle. You must seek some other reason if +you would obtain your pardon, for that one will not help you; and since +there is now nothing to be done, I will tell you, wicked and cowardly +man that you are, that there is no medicine in the world which will so +quickly drive away the maladies of us women as the pleasant and amorous +society of men. Do you see me now weakened and dried up with disease? +Well! all that I want is your company." +</p> +<p> +"Ho, ho!" said the other; "then I will quickly cure you." +</p> +<p> +He jumped on the bed and performed as well as he could, and, as soon as +he had broken two lances, she rose and stood on her feet. +</p> +<p> +Half an hour later she was out in the street, and her neighbours, who +all looked upon her as almost dead, were much astonished, until she told +them by what means she had been cured, when they at once replied that +that was the only remedy. +</p> +<p> +Thus did the good merchant learn how to cure his wife; but it turned out +to his disadvantage in the long run, for she often pretended to be sick +in order to get her physic. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="2H_4_0091"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="91pg (138K)" src="images/91pg.jpg" height="971" width="596" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE NINETY-FIRST — THE OBEDIENT WIFE. <a href="#note-91" name="noteref-91">91</a> +</h2> +<h3> + By The Editor. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i> Of a man who was married to a woman so lascivious and lickerish, that +I believe she must have been born in a stove or half a league from the +summer sun, for no man, however well he might work, could satisfy her; +and how her husband thought to punish her, and the answer she gave him.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +When I was lately in Flanders, in one of the largest towns in the +province, a jovial fellow told me a good story of a man married to a +woman so given to venery and concupiscence that she would have let a +man lie with her in the public streets. Her husband knew well how she +misbehaved herself, but he was not clever enough to prevent it, so +cunning and depraved was she. He threatened to beat, to leave her, or to +kill her, but it was all a waste of words; he might as well have tried +to tame a mad dog or some other animal. She was always seeking fresh +lovers with whom to fornicate, and there were few men in all the country +round who had not tried to satisfy her lust; anyone who winked at her, +even if he were humpbacked, old, deformed, or disfigured in any way, +could have her favours for nothing. +</p> +<p> +Her unfortunate husband, seeing that she still continued this life in +spite of all his menaces, tried to hit upon a method to frighten her. +When he was alone with her in the house, he said; +</p> +<p> +"Well, Jehanne (or Beatrix, for so he called her) I see that you are +determined to continue this life of vice, and, however much I may +threaten to punish you, you take no more heed of me than though I held +my tongue." +</p> +<p> +"Alas, husband," she replied, "I am much to be pitied, but there is no +help for it, for I was born under a planet which compels me to go with +men." +</p> +<p> +"Oh, indeed," said the husband, "is that your destiny? I swear I will +soon find a remedy for that." +</p> +<p> +"You will kill me then," she said, "for nothing else will cure me." +</p> +<p> +"Never mind," he said. "I know the best way." +</p> +<p> +"What is it?" she asked. "Tell me." +</p> +<p> +"Morbleu!" he said, "I will give you such a doing some day, that I will +put a quartette of babies in your belly, and then I will leave you to +get your own living." +</p> +<p> +"You will?" she cried. "Indeed! Well, you have but to begin. Such +threats frighten me very little, I do not care a farthing for them. May +I have my head shaved if I attempt to run away. (*) If you think you are +capable of making four babies at once, come on, and begin at once—the +mould is ready." +</p> +<pre> + (*) Long hair was considered honourable, and to have the + head shaved or cropped was a mark of disgrace. +</pre> +<p> +"The devil take the woman," said the husband; "there is no way of +punishing her." +</p> +<p> +He was obliged to let her fulfil her destiny, for nothing short of +splitting her head open would have kept her backside quiet; so he let +her run about like a bitch on heat amongst a couple of dozen dogs, and +accomplish all her inordinate desires. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="image-0052"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/92.jpg" height="883" width="631" +alt="92.jpg" title=" Women's Quarrels. +"> +</center> + +<a name="2H_4_0092"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="92pg (132K)" src="images/92pg.jpg" height="939" width="594" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE NINETY-SECOND — WOMEN'S QUARRELS. +</h2> +<h3> + By The Editor. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a married woman who was in love with a Canon, and, to avoid +suspicion, took with her one of her neighbours when she went to visit +the Canon; and of the quarrel that arose between the two women, as you +will hear.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +In the noble city of Metz in Lorraine, there lived, some time ago a +woman who was married, but also belonged to the confraternity of the +<i>houlette</i> (*); nothing pleased her more than that nice amusement we all +know: she was always ready to employ her arms, and prove that she was +right valiant, and cared little for blows. +</p> +<pre> + (*) "The frail sisterhood". +</pre> +<p> +Now hear what happened to her whilst she was exercising her profession. +She was enamoured of a fat canon, who had more money than an old dog has +fleas. But as he lived in a place where people came at all hours, she +did not know how she was to come to her canon un-perceived. +</p> +<p> +She pondered over the matter, and at last determined to take into her +confidence a neighbour of hers, a sister-in-arms also of the <i>houlette</i>, +for it seemed to her that she might go and see her canon, if accompanied +by her neighbour, without causing any suspicion. +</p> +<p> +As it was devised, so was it done, and she went to see the canon, as +though on an affair of great importance, and honourably escorted, as has +been said. +</p> +<p> +To shorten the story, as soon as our <i>bourgeoises</i> arrived, after all +due salutations, the principal personage shut herself up with her lover, +the canon, and he gave her a mount, as he well knew how. +</p> +<p> +The neighbour, seeing the other have a private audience with the master +of the house, had no small envy, and was much displeased that she could +not do the same. +</p> +<p> +When the first-named woman came out of the room, after receiving what +she came for, she said to her neighbour; +</p> +<p> +"Shall We go?" +</p> +<p> +"Oh, indeed," said the other, "am I to go away like that? If I do not +receive the same courtesy that you did, by God I will reveal everything. +I did not come to warm the wax for other people." +</p> +<p> +When they saw what she wanted, they offered her the canon's clerk, who +was a stout and strong gallant well suited for the work, but she refused +him point blank, saying that she deserved his master and would have none +other. +</p> +<p> +The canon was obliged, to save his honour, to grant her request, and +when that was accomplished, she wished to say farewell and leave. +</p> +<p> +But then the other would not, for she said angrily that it was she +who had brought her neighbour, and for whom the meeting was primarily +intended, and she ought to have a bigger share than the other, and that +she would not leave unless she had another "truss of oats." +</p> +<p> +The Canon was much alarmed when he heard this, and, although he begged +the woman who wanted the extra turn not to insist, she would not be +satisfied. +</p> +<p> +"Well," he said, "I am content, since it needs must be; but never come +back under similar conditions—I shall be out of town." +</p> +<p> +When the battle was over, the damsel who had had an additional turn, +when she took leave, asked the canon to give her something as a +keepsake. +</p> +<p> +Without waiting to be too much importuned, and also to get rid of +them, the good canon handed them the remainder of a piece of stuff for +kerchiefs, which he gave them, and the "principal" received the gift, +and they said farewell. +</p> +<p> +"It is," he said, "all that I can give you just now; so take it in good +part." +</p> +<p> +They had not gone very far, and were in the street, when the neighbour, +who had had nothing more than one turn, told her companion that she +wanted her share of the gift. +</p> +<p> +"Very well," said the other, "I have no objection. How much do you +want?" +</p> +<p> +"Need you ask that," said she. "I am going to have half, and you the +same." +</p> +<p> +"How dare you ask," said the other, "more than you have earned? Have you +no shame? You know well that you only went once with the canon, and I +went twice, and, pardieu, it is not right that you should have as much +as I." +</p> +<p> +"Pardieu! I will have as much as you," said the second. +</p> +<p> +"Did I not do my duty as well as you?" +</p> +<p> +"What do you mean by that?" +</p> +<p> +"Is not once as good as ten times? And now that you know my will, +instead of standing here squabbling over a trifle, I recommend you to +give me my half, or you will soon see a fight. Do you think you can do +as you like with me?" +</p> +<p> +"Oh, indeed!" said the other, "will you try force? By God's power you +shall only have what is right,—that is to say one third part—and I +will have the rest. Did I not have twice as much trouble as you?" +</p> +<p> +With that the other doubled up her fist and landed it in the face of +her companion, the one for whom the meeting had been first arranged, +who quickly returned the blow. In short they fought as though they would +have killed each other, and called one another foul names. When the +people in the street saw the fight between the two companions, who a +short while previously had been so friendly, they were much astonished, +and came and separated the combatants. Then the husbands were called, +and each asked his wife the cause of the quarrel. Each tried to make +the other in the wrong, without telling the real cause, and set their +husbands against each other so that they fought, and the sergeants came +and sent them to cool their heels in prison. +</p> +<p> +Justice intervened, and the two women were compelled to own that the +fight was about a piece of stuff for a kerchief. The Council, seeing +that the case did not concern them, sent it to the "King of the +Bordels", because the women were his subjects. And during the affair the +poor husbands remained in gaol awaiting sentence, which, owing to the +infinite number of cases, is likely to remain unsettled for a long time. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="2H_4_0093"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="93pg (138K)" src="images/93pg.jpg" height="963" width="584" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE NINETY-THIRD — HOW A GOOD WIFE WENT ON A PILGRIMAGE. <a href="#note-93" name="noteref-93">93</a> +</h2> +<h3> + By Messire Timoleon Vignier. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a good wife who pretended to her husband that she was going on +a pilgrimage, in order to find opportunity to be with her lover the +parish-clerk—with whom her husband found her; and of what he said and +did when he saw them doing you know what.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +Whilst I have a good audience, let me relate a funny incident which +happened in the district of Hainault. +</p> +<p> +In a village there, lived a married woman, who loved the parish clerk +much more than she did her own husband, and in order to find means to be +with the clerk, she feigned to her husband that she owed a pilgrimage to +a certain saint, whose shrine was not far from there; which pilgrimage +she had vowed to make when she was in travail with her last child, +begging the saint that he would be content that she should go on a +certain day she named. The good, simple husband, who suspected nothing, +allowed her to go on this pilgrimage; and as he would have to remain +alone he told her to prepare both his dinner and supper before she left, +or else he would go and eat at the tavern. +</p> +<p> +She did as he ordered, and prepared a nice chicken and a piece of +mutton, and when all these preparations were complete, she told her +husband that everything was now ready, and that she was going to get +some holy water, and then leave. +</p> +<p> +She went to church, and the first man she met was the one she sought, +that is to say the clerk, to whom she told the news, that is to say how +she had been permitted to go on a pilgrimage for the whole day. +</p> +<p> +"And this is what will occur," she said. "I am sure that as soon as I +am out of the house that he will go to the tavern, and not return until +late in the evening, for I know him of old; and so I should prefer to +remain in the house, whilst he is away, rather than go somewhere else. +Therefore you had better come to our house in half an hour, and I will +let you in by the back door, if my husband is not at home, and if he +should be, we will set out on our pilgrimage." +</p> +<p> +She went home, and there she found her husband, at which she was not +best pleased. +</p> +<p> +"What! are you still here?" he asked. +</p> +<p> +"I am going to put on my shoes," she said, "and then I shall not be long +before I start." +</p> +<p> +She went to the shoemaker, and whilst she was having her shoes put on, +her husband passed in front of the cobbler's house, with another man, a +neighbour, with whom he often went to the tavern. +</p> +<p> +She supposed that because he was accompanied by this neighbour that they +were going to the tavern; whereas he had no intention of the kind, but +was going to the market to find a comrade or two and bring them back to +dine with him, since he had a good dinner to offer them—that is to say +the chicken and the mutton. +</p> +<p> +Let us leave the husband to find his comrades, and return to the woman +who was having her shoes put on. As soon as that was completed, she +returned home as quickly as she could, where she found the scholar +wandering round the house, and said to him; +</p> +<p> +"My dear, we are the happiest people in the world, for I have seen +my husband go to the tavern, I am sure, for one of his neighbours was +leading him by the arm, and I know is not likely to let my man come +back, and therefore let us be joyful. We have the whole day, till night, +to ourselves. I have prepared a chicken, and a good piece of mutton, +and we will enjoy ourselves;" and without another word they entered +the house, but left the door ajar in order that the neighbours should +suspect nothing. +</p> +<p> +Let us now return to the husband, who had found a couple of boon +companions besides the one I have mentioned, and now brought them to his +house to devour the chicken, and drink some good Beaune wine—or better, +if they could get it. +</p> +<p> +When he came to the house, he entered first, and immediately saw our two +lovers, who were taking a sample of the good work they had to do. And +when he saw his wife with her legs in the air, he told her that she need +not have troubled to bother the cobbler about her shoes, since she was +going to make the pilgrimage in that way. +</p> +<p> +He called his companions, and said; +</p> +<p> +"Good sirs, just see how my wife looks after my interests. For fear +that she should wear out her new shoes, she is making the journey on her +back:—no other woman would have done that." +</p> +<p> +He picked up the remainder of the fowl, and told her that she might +finish her pilgrimage; then closed the door and left her with her clerk, +without saying another word, and went off to the tavern. He was not +scolded when he came back, nor on the other occasions either that +he went there, because he had said little or nothing concerning the +pilgrimage which his wife had made at home with her lover, the parish +clerk. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="2H_4_0094"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="94pg (140K)" src="images/94pg.jpg" height="965" width="576" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE NINETY-FOURTH — DIFFICULT TO PLEASE. +</h2> +<pre> + (*) There is no author's name to this story in any of the + editions. +</pre> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a curé who wore a short gown, like a gallant about to be married, +for which cause he was summoned before the Ordinary, and of the sentence +which was passed, and the defence he made, and the other tricks he +played afterwards—as you will plainly hear.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +In Picardy, in the diocese of Therouenne, there lived about a year and +a half ago, in one of the large towns, a curé who aped the fashionable +youth of the time. He wore a short gown, and high boots, as was the +fashion at Court, and, in short, was as great a gallant as you would +see,—which gave no small offence to all good Churchmen. +</p> +<p> +The Ordinary of Therouenne—who is generally known as the "big devil" +—was informed of the behaviour of this curé, and cited him to appear to +be punished, and ordered to change his method of dressing. +</p> +<p> +He appeared in his short gown, as though he cared little for the +Ordinary, or thinking, perhaps, that he was going to be let off for his +good looks, but this did not happen, for when he was before the judge, +the "promoter" related the case at full length, and demanded that these +clothes and other vanities should be forbidden him, and that he should +be condemned to pay certain fines. +</p> +<p> +The judge, seeing at a glance what sort of man our curé was, forbade +him, by all the penalties of canon law, to disguise himself in the way +he had done, and ordered that he was to wear long gowns and long hair, +and moreover, to pay a good sum of money. +</p> +<p> +The curé promised that he would do so, and never again be summoned for a +similar offence. He left the Court and returned to his cure, and as soon +as he came there, he called the draper and the tailor, and he had a gown +made which trailed three quarters of an ell on the ground; for he +told the tailor how he had been reproved for wearing a short gown, and +ordered to wear a long one. +</p> +<p> +He put on this long robe, and allowed his beard and hair to grow, and in +this habit performed his parochial duties, sang Mass, and did everything +that a priest has to do. +</p> +<p> +The promoter was soon informed that the curé behaved in a way not +compatible with good morals, whereupon a fresh summons was issued, and +the priest appeared in his long gown. +</p> +<p> +"What is this?" asked the judge when the curé appeared before him. "It +seems that you make fun of the statutes and ordinances of the Church! +Why do you not dress like the other priests? If it were not for some of +your friends I should send you to prison." +</p> +<p> +"What, monseigneur!" said the curé. "Did you not order me to wear a long +gown, and long hair? Have I not done as I was commanded? Is not my gown +long enough? Is not my hair long? What do you wish me to do?" +</p> +<p> +"I wish," said the judge, "and I command that your gown and hair should +be half long, neither too much nor too little, and for this great fault +that you have committed, I condemn you to pay a fine of ten pounds to +the Prosecutor, twenty pounds to the Chapter, and as much to the Bishop +of Therouenne for his charities." +</p> +<p> +Our curé was much astonished, but there was nothing for it but +to comply. He took leave of the judge, and returned to his house, +considering how he should attire himself in order to obey the judge's +sentence. He sent for the tailor, whom he ordered to make a gown as long +on one side as that we have mentioned, and, as short as the first one +on the other side, then he had himself shaved on one side only—that on +which the gown was short—and in this guise went about the streets, and +performed his sacred duties; and although he was told this was not right +of him, he paid no attention. +</p> +<p> +The Prosecutor was again informed, and cited him to appear a third +time. When he appeared, God knows how angry the judge was—he was almost +beside himself, and, could scarcely sit on the Bench when he saw the +curé dressed like a mummer. If the priest had been mulcted before he was +still more so this time, and was condemned to pay very heavy fines. +</p> +<p> +Then the curé, finding himself thus amerced in fines and amends, said to +the judge. +</p> +<p> +"With all due respect, it seems to me that I have obeyed your orders. +Hear what I have to say, and I will prove it." +</p> +<p> +Then he covered his long beard with his hand, and said; +</p> +<p> +"If you like, I have no beard." Then, covering the shaved side of his +face, he said, "If you like, I have a long beard. Is not that what you +ordered?" +</p> +<p> +The judge, seeing that he had to do with a joker, who was making fun of +him, sent for a barber and a tailor, and before all the public, had +the cure's hair and beard dressed, and his gown cut to a proper and +reasonable length; then he sent him back to his cure where he conducted +himself properly—having learned the right manner at the expense of his +purse. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="image-0053"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/95.jpg" height="896" width="636" +alt="95.jpg" title="The Sore Finger Cured. +"> +</center> + +<a name="2H_4_0095"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="95pg (138K)" src="images/95pg.jpg" height="941" width="581" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE NINETY-FIFTH — THE SORE FINGER CURED. <a href="#note-95" name="noteref-95">95</a> +</h2> +<h3> + By Philippe De Laon. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a monk who feigned to be very ill and in danger of death, that he +might obtain the favours of a certain young woman in the manner which is +described hereafter.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +It is usually the case, thank God, that in many religious communities +there are certain good fellows who can play "base instruments". +</p> +<p> +Apropos of this, there was formerly in a convent at Paris, a good +brother, a preacher, who was accustomed to visit his female neighbours. +One day his choice lighted on a very pretty woman, a near neighbour, +young, buxom, and spirited, and but recently married to a good fellow. +</p> +<p> +Master monk fell in love with her, and was always thinking and devising +ways and means by which he could compass his desires—which were, in +short, to do you know what. Now he decided, "That is what I'll do." Then +he changed his mind. So many plans came into his head that he could not +decide on any; but of one thing he was sure, and that was that words +alone would never seduce her from the paths of virtue. "For she is too +virtuous, and too prudent. I shall be obliged, if I want to gain my +ends, to gain them by cunning and deception." +</p> +<p> +Now listen to the plan the rascal devised, and how he dishonestly +trapped the poor, little beast, and accomplished his immoral desires, as +he proposed. +</p> +<p> +He pretended one day to have a bad finger—that which is nearest to the +thumb, and is the first of the four on the right hand—and he wrapped it +in linen bandages, and anointed it with strong-smelling ointments. +</p> +<p> +He went about with it thus for a day or two, hanging about the church +porch, when he thought the aforesaid woman was coming, and God knows +what pain he pretended to suffer. +</p> +<p> +The silly wench looked on him with pity, and seeing by his face that he +appeared to be in great pain, she asked him what was the matter; and the +cunning fox pitched up a piteous tale. +</p> +<p> +The day passed, and on the morrow, about the hour of vespers, when the +good woman was at home alone, the patient came and sat by her, and acted +the sick man, that anyone who had seen him would have believed that he +was in great danger. Sometimes he would walk to the window, then back +again to the woman, and put on so many strange tricks that you would +have been astonished and deceived if you had seen him. And the poor +foolish girl, who pitied him so that the tears almost started from her +eyes, comforted him as best she could, +</p> +<p> +"Alas, Brother Aubrey, have you spoken to such and such physicians?" +</p> +<p> +"Yes, certainly, my dear," he replied. "There is not a doctor or surgeon +in Paris who has not studied my case." +</p> +<p> +"And what do they say? Will you have to suffer this pain for a long +time?" +</p> +<p> +"Alas! yes; until I die, unless God helps me; for there is but one +remedy for ray complaint, and I would rather die than reveal what +that is,—for it is very far from decent, and quite foreign to my holy +profession." +</p> +<p> +"What?" cried the poor girl. "Then there is a remedy! Then is it not +very wrong and sinful of you to allow yourself to suffer thus? Truly it +seems so to me, for you are in danger of losing sense and understanding, +so sharp and terrible is the pain." +</p> +<p> +"By God, very sharp and terrible it is," said Brother Aubrey, "but +there!—God sent it; praised be His name. I willingly suffer and +bear all, and patiently await death, for that is the only remedy +indeed—excepting one I mentioned to you—which can cure me." +</p> +<p> +"But what is that?" +</p> +<p> +"I told you that I should not dare to say what it is,—and even if I +were obliged to reveal what it is, I should never have the will or power +to put it in execution." +</p> +<p> +"By St. Martin!" said the good woman, "it appears to me that you are +very wrong to talk like that. Pardieu! tell me what will cure you, and +I assure you that I will do my utmost to help you. Do not wilfully throw +away your life when help and succour can be brought. Tell me what it is, +and you will see that I will help you—I will, pardieu, though it should +cost me more than you imagine." The monk, finding his neighbour was +willing to oblige him, after a great number of refusals and excuses, +which, for the sake of brevity, I omit, said in a low voice. +</p> +<p> +"Since you desire that I should tell you, I will obey. The doctors all +agreed that there was but one remedy for my complaint, and that was to +put my finger into the secret place of a clean and honest woman, and +keep it there for a certain length of time, and afterwards apply a +certain ointment of which they gave me the receipt. You hear what the +remedy is, and as I am by disposition naturally modest, I would rather +endure and suffer all my ills than breathe a word to a living soul. You +alone know of my sad lot, and that in spite of me." +</p> +<p> +"Well!" said the good woman, "what I said I would do I will do. I will +willingly help to cure you, and am well pleased to be able to relieve +you of the terrible pain which torments you, and find you a place in +which you can put your sore finger." +</p> +<p> +"May God repay you, damsel," said the monk. "I should never have dared +to make the request, but since you are kind enough to help me, I shall +not be the cause of my own death. Let us go then, if it please you, to +some secret place where no one can see us." +</p> +<p> +"It pleases me well," she replied. +</p> +<p> +So she led him to a fair chamber, and closed the door, and laid upon the +bed, and the monk lifted up her clothes, and instead of the finger +of his hand, put something hard and stiff in the place. When he had +entered, she feeling that it was very big, said, +</p> +<p> +"How is it that your finger is so swollen? I never heard of anything +like it." +</p> +<p> +"Truly," he replied, "it is the disease which made it like that." +</p> +<p> +"It is wonderful," she said. +</p> +<p> +Whilst this talk was going on, master monk accomplished that for which +he had played the invalid so long. She when she felt—et cetera—asked +what that was, and he replied, +</p> +<p> +"It is the boil on my finger which has burst. I am cured I think—thank +God and you." +</p> +<p> +"On my word I am pleased to hear it," said the woman as she rose +from the bed. "If you are not quite cured, come back as often as you +like;—for to remove your pain there is nothing I would not do. And +another time do not be so modest when it is a question of recovering +your health." +</p> +<hr> +<a name="2H_4_0096"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="96pg (140K)" src="images/96pg.jpg" height="962" width="578" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE NINETY-SIXTH — A GOOD DOG. <a href="#note-96" name="noteref-96">96</a> +</h2> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a foolish and rich village curé who buried his dog in the +church-yard; for which cause he was summoned before his Bishop, and +how he gave 60 gold crowns to the Bishop, and what the Bishop said to +him—which you will find related here.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +Listen if you please to what happened the other day to a simple village +curé. This good curé had a dog which he had brought up, and which +surpassed every other dog in the country in fetching a stick out of the +water, or bringing a hat that his master had forgotten, and many other +tricks. In short, this wise and good dog excelled in everything, and his +master so loved him that he never tired of singing his praises. +</p> +<p> +At last, I know not how, whether he ate something that disagreed with +him, or whether he was too hot or too cold, the poor dog became very +ill, and died, and went straightway to wherever all good dogs do go. +</p> +<p> +What did the honest curé do? You must know that his vicarage adjoined +the church-yard, and when he saw his poor dog quit this world, he +thought so wise a beast ought not to be without a grave, so he dug +a hole near the door of his house, and in the church-yard, and there +buried his dog. I do not know if he gave the dog a monument and an +epitaph, I only know that the news of the good dog's death spread over +the village, and at last reached the ears of the Bishop, together with +the report that his master had given him holy burial. +</p> +<p> +The curé was summoned to appear before the Bishop, who sent a sergeant +to fetch him. +</p> +<p> +"Alas!" said the curé, "what have I done, and why have I to appear +before the Bishop? I am much surprised at receiving this summons." +</p> +<p> +"As for me," said the sergeant, "I do not know what it is for, unless it +is because you buried your dog in the holy ground which is reserved for +the bodies of Christians." +</p> +<p> +"Ah," thought the curé to himself, "that must be it," and it occurred +to him that he had done wrong, but he knew that he could easily escape +being put into prison, by paying a fine, for the Lord Bishop—God be +praised—was the most avaricious prelate in the Kingdom, and only kept +those about him who knew how to bring grist to the mill. +</p> +<p> +"At any rate I shall have to pay, and it may as well be soon as late." +</p> +<p> +On the appointed day, he appeared before the Bishop, who immediately +delivered a long sermon about the sin of burying a dog in consecrated +ground, and enlarged on the offence so wonderfully that he made it +appear that the curé had done something worse than deny God; and at the +end he ordered the curé to be put in prison. +</p> +<p> +When the curé found that he was to be shut up in the stone box, he +demanded permission to be heard, and the Bishop gave him leave to speak. +</p> +<p> +You must know that there were a number of notable persons at this +convocation—the judge, the prosecutor, the secretaries, and notaries, +advocates, and procureurs, who were all much amused at this unusual case +of the poor curé who had buried his dog in consecrated ground. +</p> +<p> +The curé spoke briefly in his defence, to this effect. +</p> +<p> +"Truly, my Lord Bishop, if you had known my poor dog as well as I did, +you would not be surprised that I gave him Christian burial, for his +like was never seen;" and then he began to recount his doings. +</p> +<p> +"And as he was so good and wise when he was living, he was still more so +at his death; for he made a beautiful will, and, as he knew your poverty +and need, he left you fifty golden crowns, which I now bring you." +</p> +<p> +So saying, he drew the money from his bosom and gave it to the Bishop, +who willingly received it, and greatly praised the good dog, and +approved of his will, and was glad to know that he had received +honourable sepulture. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="image-0054"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/97.jpg" height="881" width="624" +alt="97.jpg" title=" Bids and Biddings. +"> +</center> + +<a name="2H_4_0097"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="97pg (132K)" src="images/97pg.jpg" height="946" width="576" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE NINETY-SEVENTH — BIDS AND BIDDINGS. +</h2> +<h3> + By Monseigneur De Launoy. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a number of boon companions making good cheer and drinking at +a tavern, and how one of them had a quarrel with his wife when he +returned home, as you will hear.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +A number of good fellows had once assembled to make good cheer at the +tavern and drink as much as they could. And when they had eaten and +drunk to God's praise and <i>usque ad Hebreos</i> (*), and had paid their +reckoning, some of them began to say, "How shall we be received by our +wives when we return home?" "God knows if we shall be excommunicated." +"They will pluck us by the beard." "By Our Lady!" said one, "I am afraid +to go home." "God help me! so am I," said another. "I shall be sure +to hear a sermon for Passion Sunday." "Would to God that my wife were +dumb—I should drink more boldly than I do now." +</p> +<pre> + (*) A pun on the word <i>ebreos</i> (drunken). +</pre> +<p> +So spoke all of them with one exception, and that was a good fellow who +said, +</p> +<p> +"How now, good sirs? You all seem every miserable, and each has a wife +who forbids him to go to the tavern, and is displeased if you drink. +Thank God my wife is not one of that sort, for if I drink ten—or even +a hundred-times a day that is not enough for her,—in short I never knew +an instance in which she did not wish I had drunk as much again. For, +when I come back from the tavern she always wishes that I had the rest +of the barrel in my belly, and the barrel along with it. Is not that a +sign that I do not drink enough to please her?" +</p> +<p> +When his companions heard this argument they began to laugh, and all +praised his wife, and then each one went his own way. +</p> +<p> +The good fellow we have mentioned, went home, where he found his wife +not over friendly, and ready to scold him; and as soon as she saw him +she began the usual lecture, and, as usual, she wished the rest of the +barrel in his belly. +</p> +<p> +"Thank you, my dear, you are always much kinder than all the other women +in the town for they all get wild if their husbands drink too much, but +you—may God repay you—always wish that I may have a good draught that +would last me all my days." +</p> +<p> +"I don't know that I wish that," she said, "but I pray to God that you +may drink such a lot some day that you may burst." +</p> +<p> +Whilst they were conversing thus affectionately, the soup-kettle on the +fire began to boil over, because the fire was too hot, and the good man, +who noticed that his wife did not take it off the fire, said; +</p> +<p> +"Don't you see, wife, that the pot is boiling over?" +</p> +<p> +She was still angry and indignant, and replied; +</p> +<p> +"Yes, master, I see it." +</p> +<p> +"Well then, take it off, confound you! Do as I bid you." +</p> +<p> +"I will," she replied, "I will bid twelve pence." (*) +</p> +<pre> + (*) There is a pun in the French on the two meanings of the + verb <i>hausser</i>,—"to raise" and to "augment" or "run up." +</pre> +<p> +"Oh, indeed, dame," said he, "is that your reply? Take off that pot, in +God's name!" +</p> +<p> +"Well!" she said. "I will put it at seven <i>sous</i>. Is that high enough?" +</p> +<p> +"Ha, ha!" he said. "By St. John that shall not pass without three blows +with a good stick." +</p> +<p> +He picked up a thick stick, and laid it with all his might across her +back, saying as he did so, +</p> +<p> +"The lot is knocked down to you." +</p> +<p> +She began to cry, and the neighbours all assembled and asked what was +the matter? The good man told them and they all laughed—except the +woman who had had the lot knocked down to her. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="2H_4_0098"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="98pg (137K)" src="images/98pg.jpg" height="946" width="590" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE NINETY-EIGHTH — THE UNFORTUNATE LOVERS. +</h2> +<h3> + By The Editor. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a knight of this kingdom and his wife, who had a fair daughter aged +fifteen or sixteen. Her father would have married her to a rich old +knight, his neighbour, but she ran away with another knight, a young +man who loved her honourably; and, by strange mishap, they both died sad +deaths without having ever co-habited,—as you will hear shortly.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +In the frontiers of France, there lived, amongst other nobles, a knight +who was rich and noble, not only by illustrious descent, but by his own +virtuous and honourable deeds, who had, by the wife he had married, an +only daughter, a very beautiful virgin, well-educated as her condition +required, and aged fifteen or sixteen years, or thereabouts. +</p> +<p> +This good and noble knight, seeing that his daughter was of a fit and +proper age for the holy sacrament of wedlock, much wished to give her +in marriage to a knight, his neighbour, who was powerful, not so much by +noble birth as by great possessions and riches, and was also from 60 to +80 years old, or thereabouts. +</p> +<p> +This wish so filled the head of the father of whom I spoke, that he +would not rest until formal promises were made between him and his +wife, the mother of the girl, and the aforesaid old knight, touching his +marriage to the girl, who, for her part, knew and suspected nothing of +all these arrangements, promises, and treaties. +</p> +<p> +Not far from the castle of the knight, the father of this damsel, there +lived another knight, a young man, valiant and brave, and moderately +rich, but not so rich as the old man of whom I spoke, and this youth was +greatly in love with the fair damsel. She also was much attached to him, +on account of his fame and great renown, and they often spoke to each +other, though with much trouble and difficulty, for her father, who +suspected their love, tried by all ways and means to prevent their +seeing each other. Nevertheless, he could not destroy the great and pure +love which united their hearts, and when fortune favoured them with an +opportunity, they discussed nothing but the means whereby they might +accomplish their whole and sole desire and marry each other. +</p> +<p> +The time approached when the damsel was to be given to the old knight, +and her father told her of the contract he had made, and named the day +on which she was to be married; at which she was greatly angered, but +thought to herself that she might find a way out of the difficulty. +</p> +<p> +She sent a message to her lover, the young knight, to tell him to come +to her secretly as soon as he could; and when he came she told him how +she was betrothed to the old knight, and asked her lover's advice as to +how this marriage was to be broken off, for that she would never have +any other man but him. +</p> +<p> +The knight replied, +</p> +<p> +"My dearest lady, since of your kindness you offer me that which I +should never have dared to ask without great shame, I thank you humbly, +and if it be your will, I will tell you what we will do. We will appoint +a day for me to come to this town accompanied by many of my friends, +and at a given hour you will repair to a certain place, both of which we +will arrange now that I am alone with you. You will mount on my horse, +and I will conduct you to my castle. And then, if we can manage to +pacify your father and mother, we will fulfil our promises of plighted +troth." +</p> +<p> +She replied that the plan was a good one, and she would carry it out +properly. She told him that on such a day, at such an hour, he would +find her at a certain place, and that she would do all that he had +arranged. +</p> +<p> +The appointed day arrived, and the young knight appeared at the place +mentioned, and there he found the lady, who mounted on his horse, and +they rode fast until they were far from there. +</p> +<p> +The good knight, fearing that he should fatigue his dearly beloved +mistress, slackened his speed, and spread his retainers on every road to +see that they were not followed, and he rode across the fields, without +keeping to any path or road, and as gently as he could, and charged his +servants that they should meet at a large village which he named, and +where he intended to stop and eat. This village was remote, and away +from the high road. +</p> +<p> +They rode until they came to this village, where the local <i>fête</i> was +being held, which had brought together all sorts of people. They entered +the best tavern in the place, and at once demanded food and drink, for +it was late after dinner, and the damsel was much fatigued. A good fire +was made, and food prepared for the servants of the knight who had not +yet arrived. +</p> +<p> +Hardly had the knight and the lady entered the tavern than there came +four big swashbucklers—waggoners or drovers, or perhaps worse—who +noisily entered the tavern, and demanded where was the <i>bona roba</i> that +some ruffian had brought there, riding behind him on his horse, for they +would drink with her, and amuse themselves with her. +</p> +<p> +The host who knew the knight well, and was aware that the rascals +spake not the truth, told them gently that the girl was not what they +imagined. +</p> +<p> +"Morbleu!" they replied; "if you do not bring her at once, we will +batter down the door, and bring her by force in spite of the two of +you." +</p> +<p> +When the host heard this, and found that his explanation was no use, +he named the knight, who was renowned through all that district, but +unknown to many of the common people, because he had long been out of +the country, acquiring honour and renown in wars in distant countries. +The host told them also that the damsel was a young virgin, a relative +of the knight, and of noble parentage. +</p> +<p> +"You can, messieurs," he said, "without danger to yourself or others, +quench your lust with many of the women who have come to the village on +the occasion of the <i>fête</i> expressly for you and the like of you, and +for God's sake leave in peace this noble damsel, and think of the great +danger that you run, the evil that you wish to commit and the small hope +that you have of success." +</p> +<p> +"Drop your sermons," shouted the rascals, inflamed with carnal lust, +"and bring her to us quietly; or if not we will cause a scandal, for we +will bring her down openly, and each of us four will do as he likes with +her." +</p> +<p> +These speeches being finished, the good host went up to the chamber +where the knight and the damsel were, and called the knight apart, and +told him this news, which when he had heard, without being troubled +in the least, he went down wearing his sword, to talk to the four +swashbucklers, and asked them politely what they wanted? +</p> +<p> +And they, being foul-mouthed and abusive blackguards, replied that they +wanted the <i>bona roba</i> that he kept shut up in his chamber, and that, if +he did not give her up quietly, they would take her from him by force. +</p> +<p> +"Fair sirs," said the knight, "if you knew me well you would be aware +that I should not take about women of that sort. I have never done such +a folly, thank God. And even if I ever did—which God forbid—I +should never do it in this district, where I and all my people are well +known—my nobility and reputation would not suffer me to do it. This +damsel is a young virgin, a near relative, related also to a noble +house, and we are travelling for our pleasure, accompanied by my +servants, who although they are not here at present, will come directly, +and I am waiting for them. Moreover, do not flatter yourselves that I +should be such a coward as to let her be insulted, or suffer injury +of any kind; but I would protect and defend her as long as my strength +endured, and until I died." +</p> +<p> +Before the knight had finished speaking, the villains interrupted him, +and in the first place denied that he was the person he said, because +he was alone, and that knight never travelled without a great number of +servants. Therefore they recommended him, if he were wise, to bring the +girl down, otherwise they would take her by force, whatever consequences +might ensue. +</p> +<p> +When this brave and valiant knight found that fair words were of no use, +and that force was the only remedy, he summoned up all his courage, and +resolved that the villains should not have the damsel, and that he was +ready to die in her defence. +</p> +<p> +At last one of the four advanced to knock with his bludgeon at the door +of the chamber, and the others followed him, and were bravely beaten +back by the knight. Then began a fight which lasted long, and although +the two parties were so unequally matched, the good knight vanquished +and repulsed the four villains, and as he pursued them to drive them +away, one of them, who had a sword, turned suddenly and plunged it in +the body of the knight, and pierced him through, so that he fell dead +at once, at which they were very glad. Then they compelled the host to +quietly bury the body in the garden of the inn. +</p> +<p> +When the good knight was dead, the villains came and knocked at the door +of the chamber where the damsel was impatiently awaiting the return of +her lover, and they pushed open the door. +</p> +<p> +As soon as she saw the brigands enter, she guessed that the knight was +dead, and said; +</p> +<p> +"Alas, where is my protector? Where is my sole refuge? What has become +of him? Why does he thus wound my heart and leave me here alone?" +</p> +<p> +The scoundrels, seeing that she was much troubled, thought to falsely +deceive her by fair words, and told her the knight had gone to another +house, and had commanded them to go to her and protect her; but she +would not believe them, for her heart told her that they had killed him. +She began to lament, and to cry more bitterly than ever. +</p> +<p> +"What is this?" they said. "Why all these tricks and manners? Do you +think we don't know you? If you imagine your bully is still alive, you +are mistaken—we have rid the country of him. Therefore make your mind +up that we are all four going to enjoy you." At these words one of them +advanced, and seized her roughly, saying that he would have her company. +</p> +<p> +When the poor damsel saw herself thus forced, and that she could not +soften their hearts, she said; +</p> +<p> +"Alas! sirs, since you will force me, and my humble prayers cannot +soften you, at least have this decency; that if I abandon myself to +you it shall be privately, that is to say each separately without the +presence of the others." +</p> +<p> +They agreed to this, though with a bad grace, and then they made her +choose which of the four should first have her company. She chose the +one that she fancied was the mildest and best-tempered, but he was +the worst of all. The door was closed, and then the poor damsel threw +herself at the scoundrel's feet, and with many piteous appeals, begged +that he would have pity on her. But he was obstinate, and declared that +he would have his will of her. +</p> +<p> +When she saw that he was so cruel, and that her prayers could not melt +him, she said. +</p> +<p> +"Well then, since so it must be, I am content; but I beg of you to close +the windows that we may be more secret." +</p> +<p> +He willingly consented, and whilst he was closing them, she drew a +little knife that she wore at her girdle, and uttering one long, piteous +cry, she cut her throat, and gave up the ghost. +</p> +<p> +When the scoundrel saw her lying on the ground, he fled along with his +companions, and it is to be supposed that they were afterwards punished +according to their deserts. +</p> +<p> +Thus did these two sweet lovers end their days, one directly after the +other, without ever having tasted of the joys and pleasures in which +they hoped to have lived together all their days. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="2H_4_0099"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="99pg (136K)" src="images/99pg.jpg" height="938" width="575" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE NINETY-NINTH — THE METAMORPHOSIS. <a href="#note-99" name="noteref-99">99</a> +</h2> +<h3> + By The Editor. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Relates how a Spanish Bishop, not being able to procure fish, ate +two partridges on a Friday, and how he told his servants that he had +converted them by his prayers into fish—as will more plainly be related +below.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +If you wish, you shall hear now, before it is too late, a little story +about a brave Spanish Bishop who went to Rome to transact some business +for his master the King of Castille. +</p> +<p> +This brave prelate, whom I intend to make furnish this last story, +arrived one day at a little village in Lombardy, it being then early on +a Friday evening, and ordered his steward to have supper early, and to +go into the town and buy what he could, for he (the Bishop) was very +hungry, not having broken his fast all that day. +</p> +<p> +His servant obeyed him, and went to the market, and to all the +fishmongers in the town, to procure some fish, but, to make the story +short, not a single fish, in spite of all the efforts made by the +steward, could be found. +</p> +<p> +But, on returning to the inn, he met a countryman, who had two fine +partridges which he would sell very cheaply. The steward thought he +would secure them, and they would serve to make the Bishop a feast on +Sunday. +</p> +<p> +He bought them, a great bargain, and came to his master with the two +partridges in his hand, all alive, and fat, and plump, and told him of +his failure to get any fish, at which my Lord was not best pleased. +</p> +<p> +"And what can we have for supper?" +</p> +<p> +"My Lord," replied the steward, "I will get them to prepare you eggs in +a hundred thousand different ways, and you can have apples and pears. +Our host has also some rich cheese. We will do our best; have patience, +a supper is soon over, and you shall fare better to-morrow, God willing. +We shall be in a town which is much better provided with fish than this, +and on Sunday you cannot fail to dine well, for here are two partridges +which are plump and succulent." +</p> +<p> +The Bishop looked at the two partridges, and found them as the steward +said, plump, and in good condition, so he thought they would take the +place of the fish which he had lost. So he caused them to be killed and +prepared for the spit. +</p> +<p> +When the steward saw that his master wished to have them roasted, he was +astounded, and said to his master; +</p> +<p> +"My lord, it is well to kill them, but to roast them now for Sunday +seems a pity." +</p> +<p> +But the steward lost his time, for, in spite of his remonstrances, they +were put on the spit and roasted. +</p> +<p> +The good prelate watched them cooking, and the poor steward was +scandalized, and did not know what to make of his master's ill-ordered +appetite. +</p> +<p> +When the partridges were roasted, the table laid, the wine brought in, +eggs cooked in various ways, and served to a turn, the prelate seated +himself, said grace, and asked for the partridges, with mustard. +</p> +<p> +His steward wished to know what his master would do with these birds, +and brought them to him fresh from the fire, and emitting an odour +enough to make a friar's mouth water. +</p> +<p> +The good Bishop attacked the partridges, and began to cut and eat with +such haste, that he did not give his squire, who came to carve for him, +sufficient time to lay his bread, and sharpen his knife. +</p> +<p> +When the steward saw his master eating the birds, he was so amazed that +he could no longer keep silent, and said to him; +</p> +<p> +"Oh, my lord, what are you doing? Are you a Jew or a Saracen, that you +do not keep Friday? By my faith, I am astonished at such doings." +</p> +<p> +"Hold your tongue! Hold your tongue!" said the good prelate, who had +his hands and his beard covered with fat and gravy. "You are a fool, +and know not what you are saying. I am doing no harm. You know well and +believe, that by the words spoken by me and other priests, we make of +the host, which is nothing but flour and water, the precious body of +Jesus Christ. Can I not by the same means?—I who have seen so many +things at the court of Rome and many other places—know by what words +I may transform these partridges, which are flesh, into fish, although +they still retain the form of partridges? So indeed I have done. I have +long known how to do this. They were no sooner put to the fire than by +certain words I know, I so charmed them that I converted them into the +substance of fish, and you might—all of you who are here—eat, as I do, +without sin. But as you would still believe them to be flesh, they would +do you harm, so I alone will commit the sin." +</p> +<p> +The steward and the other attendants began to laugh, and pretended to +believe the highly-coloured story that their master had told them, and +ever after that were up to the trick, and related it joyously in many +places. +</p> +<hr> +<a name="image-0055"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/100.jpg" height="912" width="616" +alt="100.jpg" title="The Chaste Lover. +"> +</center> + +<a name="2H_4_0100"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> +<br /> +<br /> +<center> +<img alt="100pg (139K)" src="images/100pg.jpg" height="951" width="585" /> +</center> +<br /> +<br /> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + STORY THE HUNDREDTH AND LAST — THE CHASTE LOVER. +</h2> +<h3> + By Philippe De Laon. +</h3> +<blockquote><p> +<i>Of a rich merchant of the city of Genoa, who married a fair damsel, +who owing to the absence of her husband, sent for a wise clerk—a young, +fit, and proper man—to help her to that of which she had need; and +of the fast that he caused her to make—as you will find more plainly +below.</i> +</p></blockquote> +<p> +In the powerful and well-populated city of Genoa, there, lived some +time ago, a merchant who was very rich, and whose business consisted +in sending much merchandise by sea to foreign lands, and especially to +Alexandria. So occupied was he with the management of his ships, and in +heaping up riches, that during all his days, from his tender youth till +the time that he was fifty years of age, he never cared or wanted to do +anything else. +</p> +<p> +When he had arrived at this last mentioned age, he began to think about +his condition, and to see that he had spent and employed all his days +and years in heaping up riches without ever having for a single minute +or moment been inclined to think of marrying and having children, to +whom the great wealth, that he had by great diligence and labour amassed +and acquired, would succeed. This thought caused him much mental sorrow, +and he was greatly vexed that he had thus spent his youth. +</p> +<p> +This grief and regret lasted many days, during which time it happened +that in the above-named city, the young children, after they had +solemnized some festival, did as they were accustomed each year, and +variously apparelled and disguised, some this way and some that, came in +great numbers to the place where the public rejoicings of the city are +usually held, to play in the presence of their fathers and mothers, and +to have their costumes praised and admired. +</p> +<p> +At this assembly was our merchant, still moody and vexed, and the +sight of so many fathers and mothers taking pleasure in watching their +children dance and sport, increased the grief that was preying on his +mind, and, unable to watch them any longer, he returned to his house, +sad and vexed, and retired to his lonely chamber, where he remained some +time, uttering complaints of this kind; +</p> +<p> +"Ah, poor, miserable, old man that I am and always have been, and for +whom fate and destiny are hard, bitter, and unpleasant. Oh, wretched +man! worn out and weary by watching and work, suffered and borne by +land and sea. Your great riches and heaped-up treasures, which with +many perilous adventures, hard work, and sweat you have amassed, and for +which you have expended all your time, are but vain, for you have never +thought who will possess them, and to whom by human law you should leave +your memory and your name when you are dead and gone. Oh, wicked man, +how could you have been careless of that of which you should have taken +most heed? Marriage never pleased you, and you always feared and refused +it, and even disliked and scorned the good and just counsels of those +who would have found you a wife, in order that you might have offspring +who would perpetuate your name, your praise, and your renown. Oh, how +happy are those parents who leave good and wise children to succeed +them! How many fathers have I seen to-day playing with their children, +who would call themselves most happy, and think they had well employed +their time, if, after their decease, they could leave their children but +one small part of the great wealth that I possess! But what pleasure and +solace can I ever have? What name or fame shall I leave after my death? +Where is the son who will cherish my memory when I am dead? Blessed be +that holy condition of marriage by which the memory and recollection of +fathers is preserved, and by which fiefs, possessions, and heritages are +permanently secured to their happy children!" +</p> +<p> +When the good merchant had thus argued to himself for a long time, he +suddenly thought of a remedy for his misfortunes, saying; +</p> +<p> +"Well, I am in future determined, notwithstanding the number of my +years, not to trouble or torment myself with grief, or remorse. At the +worst I have but been like the birds, which prepare their nests before +they begin to lay their eggs. I have, thank God, riches sufficient for +myself, wife, and many children, if it should happen that I have any, +nor am I so old, or so devoid of natural vigour, as to lose hope of even +having any offspring. What I have to do is to watch and work, and use +every endeavour to discover where I shall find a wife fit and proper for +me." +</p> +<p> +Having finished his soliloquy, he left his chamber, and sent for two of +his comrades—merchant-mariners like himself,—and to them he plainly +stated his case, and requested them to help to find him a wife, for that +was the thing he most desired in the world. +</p> +<p> +The two merchants, having heard what their comrade had to say, much +applauded his determination, and undertook to make all possible +endeavours to find him a wife. +</p> +<p> +Whilst they were making enquiries, our merchant,—as hot to get married +as he could be—played the gallant, and sought throughout the city all +the youngest and prettiest girls—to the others he paid small heed. +</p> +<p> +He searched so well that he found one such as he required,—born +of honest parents, marvellously beautiful, aged only fifteen or +thereabouts, gentle, good-tempered, and well brought up in every +respect. +</p> +<p> +As soon as he knew her virtues and good qualities, he felt such +affection and desire that she should be his lawful wife, that he +asked her hand of her parents and friends; which, after some slight +difficulties that were quickly removed, was given, and the same hour +they were betrothed, and security given by him for the dower he was to +bestow upon her. +</p> +<p> +If the good merchant had taken pride and pleasure in his merchandise +during the time that he was amassing a fortune, he felt still more when +he saw himself certain of being married, and that to a wife by whom he +could have fine children. +</p> +<p> +The wedding was honourably celebrated, with all due pomp, and that feast +being over and finished, he forgot all about his former life,—that is +to say on the sea—but lived happily and in great pleasure with his fair +and fond wife. +</p> +<p> +But this way of life did not last long, for he soon became tired and +bored, and before the first year had expired took a dislike to living at +home in idleness and a humdrum domestic existence, and pined for his +old business of merchant-mariner, which seemed to him easier and more +pleasant than that which he had so willingly undertaken to manage night +and day. +</p> +<p> +He did nothing but devise how he could get to Alexandria, as he used in +the old days, and it seemed to him that it was not only difficult but +impossible for him to abstain from going to sea. Yet though he firmly +resolved to return to his old profession, he concealed his intention +from his wife, fearing that she might be displeased. +</p> +<p> +There were also fears and doubts which disturbed him, and prevented him +from executing his designs, for he knew the youth and character of his +wife, and he felt sure that if he were absent she would not be able to +control herself; and he considered also the mutability and variability +of the feminine character, and that the young gallants were accustomed +to pass in front of his house to see his wife, even when he was at +home,—whence he imagined that in his absence they might come closer, +and peradventure even take his place. +</p> +<p> +For a long time he was tormented by these difficulties and suspicions +without saying a word but as he knew that he had lived the best part of +his life, he now cared little for wife, marriage, and all that concerned +domestic life, and to the arguments and theories which filled his head, +provided a speedy solution by saying;— +</p> +<p> +"It is better to live than to die, and, if I do not quit my household +very shortly, it is very certain that I shall not live. But then, shall +I leave my fair and affectionate wife? Yes, I will leave her;—she +shall henceforth manage for herself as she pleases; it will no longer +be incumbent on me. Alas, what shall I do? What a dishonour, what +an annoyance it would be for me if she did not continue to guard her +chastity. Ah, yes, it is better to live than to die, that I may be able +to look after her! But God cannot wish that I should take such care +and pains about a woman's belly without any pay or reward, and receive +nothing in return but torture of soul and body. I will not bear all the +trouble and anguish of mind that many suffer in living with their wives. +It angers me and saddens me to think that God only permits me to live +to enjoy the trifling incidents of married life. I want full liberty and +freedom to do what I please." +</p> +<p> +When the good merchant had finished these sage reflections, he went and +found some of his old comrades, and told them that he wished to visit +Alexandria with a cargo of merchandise, as he had often previously done +in their company,—but he did not tell them of the trouble and anxiety +which his married life caused him. +</p> +<p> +He soon made all arrangements with them, and they told him to be ready +to start when the first fair wind came. The sailors and cargo were soon +ready, and awaited in a safe place, a fair wind to start. +</p> +<p> +The good merchant, still firm in his determination, as on the previous +days, found his wife alone in her chamber, and that she should not be +sad at his departure, addressed her in these words. +</p> +<p> +"My dearest wife, whom I love better than my life, I beg of you to be +of good heart, and show yourself joyful, and be not sad or cast down at +what I am about to say to you. I propose—if it be God's pleasure—to +once more visit Alexandria, as I have long been in the habit of doing; +and it seems to me that you should not be vexed thereat, seeing that +you are aware that that is my business and profession, by which I have +acquired riches, houses, name, and fame, and many good friends. The +handsome and rich ornaments, rings, garments, and other things with +which you are apparelled and ornamented as is no other woman in the +city, as you well know, I have acquired by the profit I have made on my +merchandise. This journey of mine therefore should not trouble you, +for I shall shortly return. And I promise you that if this time,—as I +hope,—Fortune should smile upon me, never will I return there again, +but this time will take leave of it for ever. You must therefore be +of good courage, and I will leave in your hands the disposition, +administration, and management of all the goods which I possess; but +before I leave I have some requests to make of you. +</p> +<p> +"The first is, I beg of you to be happy whilst I am on my voyage, and +live comfortably; for if I know that such is the case I shall have +greater pleasure in my voyage. For the second, you know that nothing +should be hidden or concealed between us two, and all honour, profit, +and renown should be—as I know they are—common to both of us, and +the praise and honour of the one cannot exist without the glory of the +other, and similarly the dishonour of the one would be the shame of us +both. I wish you to understand that I am not so devoid of sense that I +am not aware that I leave you young, beautiful, kind, fresh, and tender, +and without the consolation of a husband; and that many men will desire +you. And although I firmly believe that you are now fully resolved, +nevertheless, when I think of your age and inclinations and the warmth +of your desires, it does not seem possible to me that you should not, +out of pure necessity and compulsion, enjoy the company of a man during +my absence. It is my will and pleasure therefore to permit you to grant +those favours which nature compels you to grant. I would beg of you +though to respect our marriage vow unbroken as long as you possibly can. +I neither intend nor wish to leave you in the charge of any person, but +leave you to be your own guardian. Truly, there is no duenna, however +watchful, who can prevent a woman from doing what she wishes. When +therefore your desires shall prick and spur you on, I would beg you, my +dear wife, to act with such circumspection in their execution that they +may not be publicly known,—for if you do otherwise, you, and I, and all +our friends will be infamous and dishonoured. +</p> +<p> +"If then you cannot remain chaste, at least take pains to retain your +reputation. I will teach you how that is to be done, if the need should +arise. You know that in our good city there are plenty of handsome +men. From amongst these choose one only, and be content to do with him +whatever nature may incline you to do. At all events, I wish that in +making your choice you should take particular care that he is not a +vagabond, or dishonest, or disreputable person, for great dangers might +arise from your acquaintance with such a person, inasmuch as he would, +without doubt publish your secret. +</p> +<p> +"You will select one therefore who is, you are sure, both wise and +prudent, and who will take as much pains to conceal your amour as you do +yourself. This I beg of you, and that you will promise me honestly and +loyally to remember this lesson. I do not advise you to reply in the way +that other women are accustomed to when similar proposals are made +to them. I know what they would say, which would be somewhat to this +effect. 'Oh, husband! what do you mean by speaking like that? How could +you have such a cruel, unjust opinion of me? How can you imagine that I +should commit such an abominable crime? No! no! God forbid that I should +make you such a promise. I will rather wish that the earth may open and +swallow me up alive the day and hour—I will not say commit—but even +think of committing such a sin. +</p> +<p> +"My dear wife, I have shown you this way of replying in order that you +may not use the same to me. I firmly and truly believe that at the +present moment you are fully determined to remain chaste, and I desire +you to remain of that opinion as long as nature will permit you. And +understand that I do not wish you to break your vows unless you are +unable to battle against the appetites of your frail and weak youth." +</p> +<p> +When the good merchant had finished his speech, his fair, kind, and +gentle wife, her face all suffused with blushes, trembled, and could not +for some moments reply to what her husband had said. Soon her blushes +vanished, her confidence returned, and calling up all her courage, she +replied in these words; +</p> +<p> +"My kind, and greatly beloved husband, I assure you that never have I +been so disturbed and troubled by any speech I have ever heard, as I +am now by your words, by which I learn something that I never heard or +guessed. You know my simplicity, youth, and innocence, and you say that +it is not possible at my age to avoid committing such a fault, and that +you are sure and know positively that when you are away I shall not be +able to preserve our marriage vow in its integrity. That speech greatly +vexed my heart, and made me tremble, and I do not know how I can reply +to your arguments. You have deprived me of the reply I should have made, +but I can tell you from the bottom of my heart that with joined hands I +beg most humbly of God that he may cause an abyss to open in which I may +be thrown, that my limbs may be torn off, and that I may suffer a most +cruel death, if ever the day comes when I shall not only be disloyal to +our marriage vow, but even think for a brief moment of being disloyal. +How, and in what manner I could be brought to commit such a crime, I am +unable to comprehend. And as you have forbidden me to reply as I should, +telling me that women are accustomed to make elusive and false excuses, +I will to give you pleasure, and allay your suspicions, and that you +may see that I am ready to obey and keep your commands, promise you this +moment with firm and immutable faith and constancy, to await the day +of your return in true, pure, and entire chastity of body, and may God +forbid that the contrary should happen. Be fully assured that I will +obey your orders in every respect. If there is anything else you wish +or command, I beg of you to inform me, and I will perform your will (I +desire nothing else) and not my own." +</p> +<p> +Our merchant, when he heard his wife's reply, was so overjoyed that he +could not refrain from weeping, and said: +</p> +<p> +"My dearest spouse, since you have of your great kindness given me the +promise that I required, I beg of you to keep it." +</p> +<p> +The following morning, the good merchant was sent for by his comrades to +put to sea. So he took leave of his wife, and commended her to the care +of God. Then he put to sea to sail to Alexandria where they arrived in +a few days, the wind being favourable, at which place they stayed a long +time both to deliver their merchandise and take in fresh cargoes. +</p> +<p> +During this time the gracious damsel of whom I have spoken remained in +the house with, as her only companion, a little girl who served her. As +I have said, this fair damsel was but fifteen years of age, therefore +any fault that she committed must be imputed, not to a vicious +character, but to youth and inexperience. +</p> +<p> +When the merchant had been absent many days, little by little she +began to forget him. As soon as the young men of the city knew of his +departure, they came to visit her. At first she would neither leave the +house nor show herself, but as they continued to come daily, she, on +account of the great pleasure she took in sweet and melodious songs and +harmonies of all instruments, which they played outside her door, peeped +through the crevices of the windows and the trellis so that she could +see the musicians, and they for their part were quite willing to be +seen. +</p> +<p> +In hearing these songs and dances she took so much pleasure, that her +mind was filled with love, and the natural warmth of her affections +often tempted her to incontinence. So often was she visited in this +manner, that in the end her concupiscence and carnal desires conquered, +and she was fairly hit by the dart of love. She often thought how easy +it was for her to find time and place for any lover, for no one guarded +her, and no one could prevent her putting her designs in execution, and +she came to the conclusion that her husband was very wise when he said +he was positive that she could not preserve continence and chastity, +although she wished to keep the promise she had made to him. +</p> +<p> +"It is right then," she said to herself, "for me to follow my husband's +advice; by doing which I shall incur no dishonour, since he himself +gave me permission, and I shall not violate the promise I made him. +I remember rightly that he charged me that if ever I broke my vow of +chastity, that I should choose a man who was wise, of good fame, and +great virtues, and no other. That is what I will really do, as I may +without disobeying my husband's instructions, and by following his good +advice which was ample for my purpose. I suppose that he did not intend +that the man should be old, and it seems to me that he should be young, +but having as good a reputation for learning and science as any old man. +Such was my husband's advice, I remember." +</p> +<p> +At the same time that the damsel was making these reflections, and was +searching for a wise and prudent, young man to cool her bowels, there +fortunately arrived in the city a very wise young clerk, who had newly +arrived from the university of Bologna, where he had been several years +without once returning to his native city. Such attention had he given +to his studies that there was not in all the country a clerk who enjoyed +such a reputation amongst the learned men of the city, whom he assisted +continually. +</p> +<p> +He was accustomed to go every day to the Town Hall on the market-place, +and was obliged to pass before the house of the said damsel, who was +much struck by his appearance and pleasant manners. And although he had +never filled any clerical office, she came to the conclusion that he +was a very learned clerk, and fell deeply in love with him, saying to +herself that he would be the man to guard her husband's secret; but +how she was to inform him of her great and ardent love, and reveal the +secret desires of her mind she knew not,—at which she was much vexed. +</p> +<p> +She bethought herself that as every day he passed before her house on +his way to the market place, that she would be upon her balcony, dressed +as handsomely as possible, in order that when he passed he might notice +her beauty, and so be led to desire those favours which would not be +refused him. +</p> +<p> +Many times did the damsel so show herself, although that had not +previously been her custom, and though she was pleasant to gaze upon, +and her youthful mind was filled with thoughts of love, the wise clerk +never perceived her, for in walking he glanced neither to the right nor +left. +</p> +<p> +This plan of the damsel's was not as successful as she imagined it would +be. She was very sorrowful, and the more she thought of the clerk, the +more ardent did her desires become. At last, after a number of plans had +suggested themselves to her, and which for the sake of brevity I pass +over, she determined to send her little servant-maid to him. So she +called her, and ordered her to go and ask for such-an-one,—that is to +say, the learned clerk—and when she had found him, to tell him to come +in haste to the house of such a damsel, the wife of so-and-so; and if he +should ask what the damsel wanted, she was to reply that she knew not, +but only knew that he was urgently required to come at once. +</p> +<p> +The little girl learned her message, and went forth to seek him; and she +was soon shown a house where he was at dinner with a great company of +his friends, and other people of high degree. +</p> +<p> +The girl entered the house, and saluting all the company, asked for the +clerk, and delivered her message properly. The good clerk, who had been +acquainted since his youth with the merchant of whom the girl spoke, and +knew his house as he did his own, but was not aware that he was married +or who was his wife, imagined that during the husband's absence, the +wife had need of advice on some weighty matter, for he knew that the +husband was away, and had no suspicion of the cause of his invitation. +He said to the girl; +</p> +<p> +"My dear, go and tell your mistress that as soon as dinner is over I +will come to her." +</p> +<p> +The messenger duly delivered these words, and God knows how she was +received by her mistress. When she heard that the clerk, her lover, +would come, she was more joyful than ever woman was, and owing to the +great joy she felt at having the clerk in the house, she trembled and +did not know what to do. She caused the house to be well swept, and fair +herbage to be spread in her chamber, covered the bed and the couch with +rich tapestry and embroidery, and dressed and adorned herself with her +most precious belongings. +</p> +<p> +Then she waited a little time, which seemed to her marvellous long on +account of the great desire she had, and so impatient was she for his +arrival, and that she might perceive him coming afar off, she went up to +her chamber and then came down again, and went now hither, now thither, +and was so excited that it seemed as though she were out of her senses. +</p> +<p> +At last she went up to her chamber, and there laid out all the riches +and delicacies that she had prepared to feast her lover. She made the +little servant-maid stay below to let the clerk in, and conduct him to +her mistress. +</p> +<p> +When he arrived, the servant-maid received him, and let him in and +closed the door, leaving his servants outside, whom she told that they +were to await their master's return. +</p> +<p> +The damsel, hearing that her lover had arrived, could not refrain from +running down stairs to meet him, and she saluted him politely. Then she +took his hand and led him to the chamber which she had prepared. He +was much astonished when he arrived there, not only by the diversity of +splendours that he saw, but also by the great beauty of the fair girl +who conducted him. +</p> +<p> +As soon as they were in the chamber, she sat down on a stool by the +couch, and made him sit on another by her side, and there they both sat +for a certain time, without saying a word, for each waited for the other +to speak, though in very different ways, for the clerk imagined that the +damsel would consult him on some great and difficult matter, and wished +her to begin; whilst she, on the other hand, knowing how wise and +prudent he was, believed that he would know why he had been sent for +without her telling him. +</p> +<p> +When she saw that he made no attempt to speak, she began, and said; +</p> +<p> +"My very dear and true friend, and learned man, I will tell you at once +why I have sent for you. I believe that you are well-acquainted and +familiar with my husband. He has left me, in the condition you now see +me, whilst he goes to Alexandria to bring back merchandise, as he has +long been used. Before his departure, he told me that when he was away, +he was sure that my weak and fragile nature would cause me to lose my +chastity, and that necessity would compel me to have intercourse with +a man to quench the natural longings I should be sure to feel after +his departure. And truly I deem him a very wise man, for that which I +thought impossible I find has happened, for my youth, beauty, and nature +rebel against wasting away in vain. That you may understand me plainly +I will tell you that my wise and thoughtful husband when he left, knew +that as all young and tender plants dry and wither when they cannot +fulfil the needs of their nature, so it was likely to be with me. +And seeing clearly that my nature and constitution were likely to be +controlled by my natural desires, which I could not long resist, he made +me swear and promise that, if nature should force me to become unchaste, +I would choose a wise man of good position, who would carefully guard +our secret. I do not think there is in all the city a man more worthy +than yourself, for you are young and very wise. I do not suppose then +that you will refuse me or repel me. You see me as I am, and you may, +during the absence of my husband, supply his place if you wish, and +without the knowledge of any one; place, time, and opportunity all +favour us." +</p> +<p> +The gentleman was much surprised and moved at what the lady said, but +he concealed his emotion. He took her right hand and with a smiling face +addressed her in these words: +</p> +<p> +"I ought to render infinite thanks to Dame Fortune, who has to-day given +me so much pleasure, and the attainment of the greatest happiness +I could have in this world; never in my life will I call myself +unfortunate, since Fortune has granted me this great favour. I may +certainly say that I am to-day the happiest of men, for when I consider, +my beautiful and kind mistress, how we may joyously pass our days +together, without any person's knowledge or interference, I almost faint +with joy. Where is the man more favoured by Fortune than I am? If it +were not for one thing which forms a slight obstacle to our love affair, +I should be the luckiest man on earth, and I am greatly vexed and +annoyed that I cannot overcome that difficulty." +</p> +<p> +When the damsel, who had never imagined that any difficulty could arise, +heard that there was an obstacle which would prevent her indulging her +passions, she was very sad and sorrowful, and begged him to say what it +was, in order that she might find a remedy if possible. +</p> +<p> +"The obstacle," he said, "is not so great that it cannot be removed in a +little time, and, since you are kind enough to wish to know what it is, +I will tell you. When I was studying at the University of Bologna, +the people of the city rose in insurrection against their ruler. I was +accused, along with some others, my companions, of having stirred up +this insurrection, and I was closely imprisoned. When I found myself in +prison, and in danger of losing my life, though I knew I was innocent, I +made a vow to God, promising that if He would deliver me from prison and +restore me to my friends and relations in this city, I would, for love +of Him, fast for a whole year on bread and water, and during that fast +would not allow my body to sin. Now I have, by His aid, accomplished +the greater part of the year and but little remains. I would beg of you +therefore, since it is your pleasure to choose me as your lover, not to +change again for any man in the world, and not to fret over the little +delay that is necessary for me to accomplish my fast, and which is now +but a very short time, and would have been long since over if I had +dared to confide in some one else who could help me, for any days that +others will fast for me are counted as though I fasted myself. And as I +perceive the great love and confidence you have for me, I will, if you +wish, place a trust in you that I have never put in my brothers, nor +my friends, nor relations. I will ask you to help me with the remaining +part of the fast to accomplish the year, that I may the sooner aid you +in the matter you have desired of me. My kind friend, I have but sixty +days to fast, which—if it is your will and pleasure—I will divide in +two parts, of which you shall have one and I will have the other, on +condition that you promise to perform your part honestly and without +fraud, and when all is completed, we will pass our days pleasantly. If +therefore, you are willing to help me in the manner I have said, tell me +at once." +</p> +<p> +It is to be supposed that this long delay was hardly pleasing to the +young woman, but as her lover had asked her so kindly, and also because +she wished the fast to be finished, that she might accomplish her +desires with her lover, and thinking also that thirty days would not +much interfere with her intentions, she promised to perform her share +without fraud, deception, or imposition. +</p> +<p> +The good gentleman, seeing that he had won his case and that his affairs +were prospering, took leave of the damsel, (who suspected no harm) and +told her that as it was on his road from his home to the market-place to +pass by her house, he would, without fail, often come and visit her, and +so he departed. +</p> +<p> +The fair damsel began the next day her fast, making a rule for herself +that during all the time of the fast she would eat nothing but bread and +water until the sun had set. +</p> +<p> +When she had fasted three days, the wise clerk, as he was going to the +market-place at the accustomed time, called upon the lady, with whom he +talked long, and then, as he was saying farewell, asked her if she had +commenced the fast? She replied she had. +</p> +<p> +"Can you continue," he said, "and keep your promise until all is +finished?" +</p> +<p> +"I can entirely," she replied; "do not fear." +</p> +<p> +He took leave and departed, and she went on from day to day with her +fast, and kept her vow as she had promised, such being her good-nature. +Before she had fasted eight days, her natural heat began to decrease so +much that she was forced to change her clothes and put on furs and thick +garments, which are usually only worn in winter, instead of the light +robes which she wore before she began the fast. +</p> +<p> +On the fifteenth day, she received a visit from her lover, who found +her so weak that she could hardly move about the house, but the poor +simpleton was firmly resolved not to practise any trickery, so deeply +in love was she, and so firmly resolved to persevere with this fast, +for the sake of the joys and pleasant delights which awaited her at the +termination. +</p> +<p> +The clerk, when he entered the house, and saw her so feeble, said; +</p> +<p> +"What kind of face is that, and how is your health? Now I see that you +are sorry you undertook this long fast! Ah, my sweetest love! have a +firm and constant mind. We have to-day achieved the half of our task: if +your nature is weak, conquer it by firmness and constancy of heart, and +do not break your faithful promise." +</p> +<p> +He admonished her so kindly, that she took courage, so that it seemed to +her that the remaining fifteen days would hardly be noticed. +</p> +<p> +The twentieth came, and the poor simpleton had lost all colour and +seemed half dead, and felt no more desires of concupiscence than if she +had been really dead. She was obliged to take to her bed and continually +remain there, and then, it occurred to her mind that the clerk had +caused her to fast to punish her carnal appetites, and she came to the +conclusion that his methods were ingenious and effective, and would not +have been thought of by a less clever and good man. +</p> +<p> +Nevertheless, she was not less resolved to go on to the ead, and +thoroughly fulfil her promise. +</p> +<p> +On the last day but one of the fast, she sent for the clerk, who, when +he saw her in bed asked her if she had lost courage now that there was +only one day more to run? +</p> +<p> +But she, interrupting him, replied; +</p> +<p> +"Ah, my good friend, you loved me with a true and perfect love, and not +dishonourably, as I dared to love you. Therefore I shall esteem you, as +long as God gives life to me and to you, as my dearest and best friend, +who protected, and taught me to protect, my chastity, and the honour and +good name, of me, my husband, my relatives, and my friends. Blessed also +be my dear husband, whose advice and counsels I have kept, to the great +solace of my heart. But for you, my friend, I render you such thanks as +I may, for your honourable conduct and your great kindness to me, for +which I can never sufficiently requite you, nor can my friends." +</p> +<p> +The good and wise clerk, seeing that he had achieved his object, took +leave of the fair damsel, and gently admonished her and advised her that +she should in future correct her body by abstinence and fasting whenever +she felt any prickings of lust. By which means she lived chastely until +the return of her husband, who knew nothing of the matter, for she +concealed it from him—and so also did the clerk. +</p> + +<center>THE END.</center> + + + +<a name="2H_NOTE"><!-- H2 anchor --></a> + +<div style="height: 4em;"><br><br><br><br></div> + +<h2> + NOTES. +</h2> + + + +<a name="note-81"><!--Note--></a> +<p class="foot"> +<u>81</u> (<a href="#noteref-81">return</a>)<br> +[ By M. de Waulvrin (Vaurin), Chamberlain to the Duke of +Burgundy. He wrote a history of England and France from the earliest +times to 1471. Also contributed No. 83.] +</p> +<a name="note-82"><!--Note--></a> +<p class="foot"> +<u>82</u> (<a href="#noteref-82">return</a>)<br> +[ In the Table of Contents of Vérard's edition, this story +is ascribed to Monseigneur de Lannoy, but at the head of the story +itself the name of the author is given as Jean Martin, who also wrote +No. 78. Jean Martin was chief <i>sommelier du corps</i> to Philippe le Bel. +After the death of that Duke he did not remain in the service of Charles +le Téméraire, but retired to Dijon, where he died, 28th Nov. 1475.] +</p> +<a name="note-84"><!--Note--></a> +<p class="foot"> +<u>84</u> (<a href="#noteref-84">return</a>)<br> +[ In the Table of Contents this story is ascribed to the +Marquis de Rothelin. He was Marquis de Hocheberg, Comte de Neufchâtel +(Switzerland) Seigneur de Rothelin etc. Marshal of Burgundy, and Grand +Seneschal of Provence. In 1491, he was appointed Grand Chamberlain of +France. He died in 1503.] +</p> +<a name="note-85"><!--Note--></a> +<p class="foot"> +<u>85</u> (<a href="#noteref-85">return</a>)<br> +[ The story is taken from an old <i>fabliau (Le Forgeron de +Creil)</i> and has been used also by Sachetti, Des Periers and others. No +author's name is given in Vêrard, but in the M.S. from which Mr. Wright +worked, the name of M. de Santilly is found at the head of this tale.] +</p> +<a name="note-88"><!--Note--></a> +<p class="foot"> +<u>88</u> (<a href="#noteref-88">return</a>)<br> +[ Found also in Boccaccio (<i>Dec</i>. day VIII, nov. VII). +Poggio (<i>Fraus mulieris</i>) and in several of the collections of <i>fabliaux +(La Bourgeoise d'Orléans)</i>. +</p> +<p> +Mr. Wright gives Alardin (who also contributed No. 77) as the author. An +Alardin Bournel returned to France with Louis XI in 1461.] +</p> +<a name="note-90"><!--Note--></a> +<p class="foot"> +<u>90</u> (<a href="#noteref-90">return</a>)<br> +[ Taken from the <i>Facetiae</i> of Poggio.] +</p> +<a name="note-91"><!--Note--></a> +<p class="foot"> +<u>91</u> (<a href="#noteref-91">return</a>)<br> +[ Taken from the <i>Facetiae</i> of Poggio.] +</p> +<a name="note-93"><!--Note--></a> +<p class="foot"> +<u>93</u> (<a href="#noteref-93">return</a>)<br> +[ Taken from the <i>Facetiae</i> of Poggio. According to Mr. +Wright, by Timoléon Vignier, possibly a brother of Philippe Vignier.] +</p> +<a name="note-95"><!--Note--></a> +<p class="foot"> +<u>95</u> (<a href="#noteref-95">return</a>)<br> +[ Taken from the <i>Facetiae</i> of Poggio.] +</p> +<a name="note-96"><!--Note--></a> +<p class="foot"> +<u>96</u> (<a href="#noteref-96">return</a>)<br> +[ An exceedingly old story, found in a <i>fabliau</i> by +Rutebeuf, Poggio's <i>Facetiae (Canis testamentum)</i> etc. It also occurs in +a collection of Russian folk-lore tales.] +</p> +<a name="note-99"><!--Note--></a> +<p class="foot"> +<u>99</u> (<a href="#noteref-99">return</a>)<br> +[ Also from Poggio's <i>Facetiae (Sacerdotis virtus)</i>. +Several of the saints have performed the same miracle in order to +avoid the terrible sin of eating meat on a Friday. It was amongst the +meritorious acts of one—St. Johannes Crucis—who was canonized as +recently as 1840.] +</p> +<a name="image-0057"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/endplate.jpg" height="413" width="407" +alt="Endplate.jpg" title="Endplate +"> +</center> + +<a name="image-0058"><!--IMG--></a> +<center> +<img src="images/gilded-top.jpg" height="503" width="829" +alt="Gilded-top.jpg" title=" Gilded pages +"> +</center> + +<br /> +<br /> + + + + + +</body> +</html> + + |