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FOR __ COMPLETE SHAKESPEARE **** +["Small Print" V.12.08.93] + +<<THIS ELECTRONIC VERSION OF THE COMPLETE WORKS OF WILLIAM +SHAKESPEARE IS COPYRIGHT 1990-1993 BY WORLD LIBRARY, INC., AND IS +PROVIDED BY PROJECT GUTENBERG ETEXT OF CARNEGIE MELLON UNIVERSITY +WITH PERMISSION. ELECTRONIC AND MACHINE READABLE COPIES MAY BE +DISTRIBUTED SO LONG AS SUCH COPIES (1) ARE FOR YOUR OR OTHERS +PERSONAL USE ONLY, AND (2) ARE NOT DISTRIBUTED OR USED +COMMERCIALLY. PROHIBITED COMMERCIAL DISTRIBUTION INCLUDES BY ANY +SERVICE THAT CHARGES FOR DOWNLOAD TIME OR FOR MEMBERSHIP.>> + +--------------- +<<THIS ELECTRONIC VERSION OF THE COMPLETE WORKS OF WILLIAM +SHAKESPEARE IS COPYRIGHT 1990-1993 BY WORLD LIBRARY, INC., AND IS +PROVIDED BY PROJECT GUTENBERG ETEXT OF CARNEGIE MELLON UNIVERSITY +WITH PERMISSION. ELECTRONIC AND MACHINE READABLE COPIES MAY BE +DISTRIBUTED SO LONG AS SUCH COPIES (1) ARE FOR YOUR OR OTHERS +PERSONAL USE ONLY, AND (2) ARE NOT DISTRIBUTED OR USED +COMMERCIALLY. PROHIBITED COMMERCIAL DISTRIBUTION INCLUDES BY ANY +SERVICE THAT CHARGES FOR DOWNLOAD TIME OR FOR MEMBERSHIP.>> + + + + +1603 + +ALLS WELL THAT ENDS WELL + +by William Shakespeare + + +Dramatis Personae + + KING OF FRANCE + THE DUKE OF FLORENCE + BERTRAM, Count of Rousillon + LAFEU, an old lord + PAROLLES, a follower of Bertram + TWO FRENCH LORDS, serving with Bertram + + STEWARD, Servant to the Countess of Rousillon + LAVACHE, a clown and Servant to the Countess of Rousillon + A PAGE, Servant to the Countess of Rousillon + + COUNTESS OF ROUSILLON, mother to Bertram + HELENA, a gentlewoman protected by the Countess + A WIDOW OF FLORENCE. + DIANA, daughter to the Widow + + + VIOLENTA, neighbour and friend to the Widow + MARIANA, neighbour and friend to the Widow + + Lords, Officers, Soldiers, etc., French and Florentine + + + +<<THIS ELECTRONIC VERSION OF THE COMPLETE WORKS OF WILLIAM +SHAKESPEARE IS COPYRIGHT 1990-1993 BY WORLD LIBRARY, INC., AND IS +PROVIDED BY PROJECT GUTENBERG ETEXT OF CARNEGIE MELLON UNIVERSITY +WITH PERMISSION. ELECTRONIC AND MACHINE READABLE COPIES MAY BE +DISTRIBUTED SO LONG AS SUCH COPIES (1) ARE FOR YOUR OR OTHERS +PERSONAL USE ONLY, AND (2) ARE NOT DISTRIBUTED OR USED +COMMERCIALLY. PROHIBITED COMMERCIAL DISTRIBUTION INCLUDES BY ANY +SERVICE THAT CHARGES FOR DOWNLOAD TIME OR FOR MEMBERSHIP.>> + + + + +SCENE: +Rousillon; Paris; Florence; Marseilles + + +ACT I. SCENE 1. +Rousillon. The COUNT'S palace + +Enter BERTRAM, the COUNTESS OF ROUSILLON, HELENA, and LAFEU, all +in black + + COUNTESS. In delivering my son from me, I bury a second +husband. + BERTRAM. And I in going, madam, weep o'er my father's death +anew; + but I must attend his Majesty's command, to whom I am now in + ward, evermore in subjection. + LAFEU. You shall find of the King a husband, madam; you, sir, a + father. He that so generally is at all times good must of + necessity hold his virtue to you, whose worthiness would stir +it + up where it wanted, rather than lack it where there is such + abundance. + COUNTESS. What hope is there of his Majesty's amendment? + LAFEU. He hath abandon'd his physicians, madam; under whose + practices he hath persecuted time with hope, and finds no +other + advantage in the process but only the losing of hope by time. + COUNTESS. This young gentlewoman had a father- O, that 'had,' +how + sad a passage 'tis!-whose skill was almost as great as his + honesty; had it stretch'd so far, would have made nature + immortal, and death should have play for lack of work. Would, +for + the King's sake, he were living! I think it would be the +death of + the King's disease. + LAFEU. How call'd you the man you speak of, madam? + COUNTESS. He was famous, sir, in his profession, and it was his + great right to be so- Gerard de Narbon. + LAFEU. He was excellent indeed, madam; the King very lately +spoke + of him admiringly and mourningly; he was skilful enough to +have + liv'd still, if knowledge could be set up against mortality. + BERTRAM. What is it, my good lord, the King languishes of? + LAFEU. A fistula, my lord. + BERTRAM. I heard not of it before. + LAFEU. I would it were not notorious. Was this gentlewoman the + daughter of Gerard de Narbon? + COUNTESS. His sole child, my lord, and bequeathed to my + overlooking. I have those hopes of her good that her +education + promises; her dispositions she inherits, which makes fair +gifts + fairer; for where an unclean mind carries virtuous qualities, + there commendations go with pity-they are virtues and +traitors + too. In her they are the better for their simpleness; she +derives + her honesty, and achieves her goodness. + LAFEU. Your commendations, madam, get from her tears. + COUNTESS. 'Tis the best brine a maiden can season her praise +in. + The remembrance of her father never approaches her heart but +the + tyranny of her sorrows takes all livelihood from her cheek. +No + more of this, Helena; go to, no more, lest it be rather +thought + you affect a sorrow than to have- + HELENA. I do affect a sorrow indeed, but I have it too. + LAFEU. Moderate lamentation is the right of the dead: excessive + grief the enemy to the living. + COUNTESS. If the living be enemy to the grief, the excess makes +it + soon mortal. + BERTRAM. Madam, I desire your holy wishes. + LAFEU. How understand we that? + COUNTESS. Be thou blest, Bertram, and succeed thy father + In manners, as in shape! Thy blood and virtue + Contend for empire in thee, and thy goodness + Share with thy birthright! Love all, trust a few, + Do wrong to none; be able for thine enemy + Rather in power than use, and keep thy friend + Under thy own life's key; be check'd for silence, + But never tax'd for speech. What heaven more will, + That thee may furnish, and my prayers pluck down, + Fall on thy head! Farewell. My lord, + 'Tis an unseason'd courtier; good my lord, + Advise him. + LAFEU. He cannot want the best + That shall attend his love. + COUNTESS. Heaven bless him! Farewell, Bertram. Exit + BERTRAM. The best wishes that can be forg'd in your thoughts be + servants to you! [To HELENA] Be comfortable to my mother, +your + mistress, and make much of her. + LAFEU. Farewell, pretty lady; you must hold the credit of your + father. Exeunt BERTRAM and LAFEU + HELENA. O, were that all! I think not on my father; + And these great tears grace his remembrance more + Than those I shed for him. What was he like? + I have forgot him; my imagination + Carries no favour in't but Bertram's. + I am undone; there is no living, none, + If Bertram be away. 'Twere all one + That I should love a bright particular star + And think to wed it, he is so above me. + In his bright radiance and collateral light + Must I be comforted, not in his sphere. + Th' ambition in my love thus plagues itself: + The hind that would be mated by the lion + Must die for love. 'Twas pretty, though a plague, + To see him every hour; to sit and draw + His arched brows, his hawking eye, his curls, + In our heart's table-heart too capable + Of every line and trick of his sweet favour. + But now he's gone, and my idolatrous fancy + Must sanctify his relics. Who comes here? + + Enter PAROLLES + + [Aside] One that goes with him. I love him for his sake; + And yet I know him a notorious liar, + Think him a great way fool, solely a coward; + Yet these fix'd evils sit so fit in him + That they take place when virtue's steely bones + Looks bleak i' th' cold wind; withal, full oft we see + Cold wisdom waiting on superfluous folly. + PAROLLES. Save you, fair queen! + HELENA. And you, monarch! + PAROLLES. No. + HELENA. And no. + PAROLLES. Are you meditating on virginity? + HELENA. Ay. You have some stain of soldier in you; let me ask +you a + question. Man is enemy to virginity; how may we barricado it + against him? + PAROLLES. Keep him out. + HELENA. But he assails; and our virginity, though valiant in +the + defence, yet is weak. Unfold to us some warlike resistance. + PAROLLES. There is none. Man, setting down before you, will + undermine you and blow you up. + HELENA. Bless our poor virginity from underminers and +blowers-up! + Is there no military policy how virgins might blow up men? + PAROLLES. Virginity being blown down, man will quicklier be +blown + up; marry, in blowing him down again, with the breach +yourselves + made, you lose your city. It is not politic in the +commonwealth + of nature to preserve virginity. Loss of virginity is +rational + increase; and there was never virgin got till virginity was +first + lost. That you were made of is metal to make virgins. +Virginity + by being once lost may be ten times found; by being ever +kept, it + is ever lost. 'Tis too cold a companion; away with't. + HELENA. I will stand for 't a little, though therefore I die a + virgin. + PAROLLES. There's little can be said in 't; 'tis against the +rule + of nature. To speak on the part of virginity is to accuse +your + mothers; which is most infallible disobedience. He that hangs + himself is a virgin; virginity murders itself, and should be + buried in highways, out of all sanctified limit, as a +desperate + offendress against nature. Virginity breeds mites, much like +a + cheese; consumes itself to the very paring, and so dies with + feeding his own stomach. Besides, virginity is peevish, +proud, + idle, made of self-love, which is the most inhibited sin in +the + canon. Keep it not; you cannot choose but lose by't. Out +with't. + Within ten year it will make itself ten, which is a goodly + increase; and the principal itself not much the worse. Away + with't. + HELENA. How might one do, sir, to lose it to her own liking? + PAROLLES. Let me see. Marry, ill to like him that ne'er it +likes. + 'Tis a commodity will lose the gloss with lying; the longer +kept, + the less worth. Off with't while 'tis vendible; answer the +time + of request. Virginity, like an old courtier, wears her cap +out of + fashion, richly suited but unsuitable; just like the brooch +and + the toothpick, which wear not now. Your date is better in +your + pie and your porridge than in your cheek. And your virginity, + your old virginity, is like one of our French wither'd pears: +it + looks ill, it eats drily; marry, 'tis a wither'd pear; it was + formerly better; marry, yet 'tis a wither'd pear. Will you + anything with it? + HELENA. Not my virginity yet. + There shall your master have a thousand loves, + A mother, and a mistress, and a friend, + A phoenix, captain, and an enemy, + A guide, a goddess, and a sovereign, + A counsellor, a traitress, and a dear; + His humble ambition, proud humility, + His jarring concord, and his discord dulcet, + His faith, his sweet disaster; with a world + Of pretty, fond, adoptious christendoms + That blinking Cupid gossips. Now shall he- + I know not what he shall. God send him well! + The court's a learning-place, and he is one- + PAROLLES. What one, i' faith? + HELENA. That I wish well. 'Tis pity- + PAROLLES. What's pity? + HELENA. That wishing well had not a body in't + Which might be felt; that we, the poorer born, + Whose baser stars do shut us up in wishes, + Might with effects of them follow our friends + And show what we alone must think, which never + Returns us thanks. + + Enter PAGE + + PAGE. Monsieur Parolles, my lord calls for you. Exit PAGE + + PAROLLES. Little Helen, farewell; if I can remember thee, I +will + think of thee at court. + HELENA. Monsieur Parolles, you were born under a charitable +star. + PAROLLES. Under Mars, I. + HELENA. I especially think, under Mars. + PAROLLES. Why under Mars? + HELENA. The wars hath so kept you under that you must needs be +born + under Mars. + PAROLLES. When he was predominant. + HELENA. When he was retrograde, I think, rather. + PAROLLES. Why think you so? + HELENA. You go so much backward when you fight. + PAROLLES. That's for advantage. + HELENA. So is running away, when fear proposes the safety: but +the + composition that your valour and fear makes in you is a +virtue of + a good wing, and I like the wear well. + PAROLLES. I am so full of business I cannot answer thee +acutely. I + will return perfect courtier; in the which my instruction +shall + serve to naturalize thee, so thou wilt be capable of a +courtier's + counsel, and understand what advice shall thrust upon thee; +else + thou diest in thine unthankfulness, and thine ignorance makes + thee away. Farewell. When thou hast leisure, say thy prayers; + when thou hast none, remember thy friends. Get thee a good + husband and use him as he uses thee. So, farewell. + Exit + HELENA. Our remedies oft in ourselves do lie, + Which we ascribe to heaven. The fated sky + Gives us free scope; only doth backward pull + Our slow designs when we ourselves are dull. + What power is it which mounts my love so high, + That makes me see, and cannot feed mine eye? + The mightiest space in fortune nature brings + To join like likes, and kiss like native things. + Impossible be strange attempts to those + That weigh their pains in sense, and do suppose + What hath been cannot be. Who ever strove + To show her merit that did miss her love? + The King's disease-my project may deceive me, + But my intents are fix'd, and will not leave me. Exit + + + + +ACT I. SCENE 2. +Paris. The KING'S palace + +Flourish of cornets. Enter the KING OF FRANCE, with letters, +and divers ATTENDANTS + + KING. The Florentines and Senoys are by th' ears; + Have fought with equal fortune, and continue + A braving war. + FIRST LORD. So 'tis reported, sir. + KING. Nay, 'tis most credible. We here receive it, + A certainty, vouch'd from our cousin Austria, + With caution, that the Florentine will move us + For speedy aid; wherein our dearest friend + Prejudicates the business, and would seem + To have us make denial. + FIRST LORD. His love and wisdom, + Approv'd so to your Majesty, may plead + For amplest credence. + KING. He hath arm'd our answer, + And Florence is denied before he comes; + Yet, for our gentlemen that mean to see + The Tuscan service, freely have they leave + To stand on either part. + SECOND LORD. It well may serve + A nursery to our gentry, who are sick + For breathing and exploit. + KING. What's he comes here? + + Enter BERTRAM, LAFEU, and PAROLLES + + FIRST LORD. It is the Count Rousillon, my good lord, + Young Bertram. + KING. Youth, thou bear'st thy father's face; + Frank nature, rather curious than in haste, + Hath well compos'd thee. Thy father's moral parts + Mayst thou inherit too! Welcome to Paris. + BERTRAM. My thanks and duty are your Majesty's. + KING. I would I had that corporal soundness now, + As when thy father and myself in friendship + First tried our soldiership. He did look far + Into the service of the time, and was + Discipled of the bravest. He lasted long; + But on us both did haggish age steal on, + And wore us out of act. It much repairs me + To talk of your good father. In his youth + He had the wit which I can well observe + To-day in our young lords; but they may jest + Till their own scorn return to them unnoted + Ere they can hide their levity in honour. + So like a courtier, contempt nor bitterness + Were in his pride or sharpness; if they were, + His equal had awak'd them; and his honour, + Clock to itself, knew the true minute when + Exception bid him speak, and at this time + His tongue obey'd his hand. Who were below him + He us'd as creatures of another place; + And bow'd his eminent top to their low ranks, + Making them proud of his humility + In their poor praise he humbled. Such a man + Might be a copy to these younger times; + Which, followed well, would demonstrate them now + But goers backward. + BERTRAM. His good remembrance, sir, + Lies richer in your thoughts than on his tomb; + So in approof lives not his epitaph + As in your royal speech. + KING. Would I were with him! He would always say- + Methinks I hear him now; his plausive words + He scatter'd not in ears, but grafted them + To grow there, and to bear- 'Let me not live'- + This his good melancholy oft began, + On the catastrophe and heel of pastime, + When it was out-'Let me not live' quoth he + 'After my flame lacks oil, to be the snuff + Of younger spirits, whose apprehensive senses + All but new things disdain; whose judgments are + Mere fathers of their garments; whose constancies + Expire before their fashions.' This he wish'd. + I, after him, do after him wish too, + Since I nor wax nor honey can bring home, + I quickly were dissolved from my hive, + To give some labourers room. + SECOND LORD. You're loved, sir; + They that least lend it you shall lack you first. + KING. I fill a place, I know't. How long is't, Count, + Since the physician at your father's died? + He was much fam'd. + BERTRAM. Some six months since, my lord. + KING. If he were living, I would try him yet- + Lend me an arm-the rest have worn me out + With several applications. Nature and sickness + Debate it at their leisure. Welcome, Count; + My son's no dearer. + BERTRAM. Thank your Majesty. Exeunt [Flourish] + + + + +ACT I. SCENE 3. +Rousillon. The COUNT'S palace + +Enter COUNTESS, STEWARD, and CLOWN + + COUNTESS. I will now hear; what say you of this gentlewoman? + STEWARD. Madam, the care I have had to even your content I wish + might be found in the calendar of my past endeavours; for +then we + wound our modesty, and make foul the clearness of our +deservings, + when of ourselves we publish them. + COUNTESS. What does this knave here? Get you gone, sirrah. The + complaints I have heard of you I do not all believe; 'tis my + slowness that I do not, for I know you lack not folly to +commit + them and have ability enough to make such knaveries yours. + CLOWN. 'Tis not unknown to you, madam, I am a poor fellow. + COUNTESS. Well, sir. + CLOWN. No, madam, 'tis not so well that I am poor, though many +of + the rich are damn'd; but if I may have your ladyship's good +will + to go to the world, Isbel the woman and I will do as we may. + COUNTESS. Wilt thou needs be a beggar? + CLOWN. I do beg your good will in this case. + COUNTESS. In what case? + CLOWN. In Isbel's case and mine own. Service is no heritage; +and I + think I shall never have the blessing of God till I have +issue o' + my body; for they say bames are blessings. + COUNTESS. Tell me thy reason why thou wilt marry. + CLOWN. My poor body, madam, requires it. I am driven on by the + flesh; and he must needs go that the devil drives. + COUNTESS. Is this all your worship's reason? + CLOWN. Faith, madam, I have other holy reasons, such as they +are. + COUNTESS. May the world know them? + CLOWN. I have been, madam, a wicked creature, as you and all +flesh + and blood are; and, indeed, I do marry that I may repent. + COUNTESS. Thy marriage, sooner than thy wickedness. + CLOWN. I am out o' friends, madam, and I hope to have friends +for + my wife's sake. + COUNTESS. Such friends are thine enemies, knave. + CLOWN. Y'are shallow, madam-in great friends; for the knaves +come + to do that for me which I am aweary of. He that ears my land + spares my team, and gives me leave to in the crop. If I be +his + cuckold, he's my drudge. He that comforts my wife is the + cherisher of my flesh and blood; he that cherishes my flesh +and + blood loves my flesh and blood; he that loves my flesh and +blood + is my friend; ergo, he that kisses my wife is my friend. If +men + could be contented to be what they are, there were no fear in + marriage; for young Charbon the puritan and old Poysam the + papist, howsome'er their hearts are sever'd in religion, +their + heads are both one; they may jowl horns together like any +deer + i' th' herd. + COUNTESS. Wilt thou ever be a foul-mouth'd and calumnious +knave? + CLOWN. A prophet I, madam; and I speak the truth the next way: + + For I the ballad will repeat, + Which men full true shall find: + Your marriage comes by destiny, + Your cuckoo sings by kind. + + COUNTESS. Get you gone, sir; I'll talk with you more anon. + STEWARD. May it please you, madam, that he bid Helen come to +you. + Of her I am to speak. + COUNTESS. Sirrah, tell my gentlewoman I would speak with her; +Helen + I mean. + CLOWN. [Sings] + + 'Was this fair face the cause' quoth she + 'Why the Grecians sacked Troy? + Fond done, done fond, + Was this King Priam's joy?' + With that she sighed as she stood, + With that she sighed as she stood, + And gave this sentence then: + 'Among nine bad if one be good, + Among nine bad if one be good, + There's yet one good in ten.' + + COUNTESS. What, one good in ten? You corrupt the song, sirrah. + CLOWN. One good woman in ten, madam, which is a purifying o' +th' + song. Would God would serve the world so all the year! We'd +find + no fault with the tithe-woman, if I were the parson. One in +ten, + quoth 'a! An we might have a good woman born before every +blazing + star, or at an earthquake, 'twould mend the lottery well: a +man + may draw his heart out ere 'a pluck one. + COUNTESS. You'll be gone, sir knave, and do as I command you. + CLOWN. That man should be at woman's command, and yet no hurt +done! + Though honesty be no puritan, yet it will do no hurt; it will + wear the surplice of humility over the black gown of a big +heart. + I am going, forsooth. The business is for Helen to come +hither. + Exit + COUNTESS. Well, now. + STEWARD. I know, madam, you love your gentlewoman entirely. + COUNTESS. Faith I do. Her father bequeath'd her to me; and she + herself, without other advantage, may lawfully make title to +as + much love as she finds. There is more owing her than is paid; +and + more shall be paid her than she'll demand. + STEWARD. Madam, I was very late more near her than I think she + wish'd me. Alone she was, and did communicate to herself her +own + words to her own ears; she thought, I dare vow for her, they + touch'd not any stranger sense. Her matter was, she loved +your + son. Fortune, she said, was no goddess, that had put such + difference betwixt their two estates; Love no god, that would +not + extend his might only where qualities were level; Diana no +queen + of virgins, that would suffer her poor knight surpris'd +without + rescue in the first assault, or ransom afterward. This she + deliver'd in the most bitter touch of sorrow that e'er I +heard + virgin exclaim in; which I held my duty speedily to acquaint +you + withal; sithence, in the loss that may happen, it concerns +you + something to know it. + COUNTESS. YOU have discharg'd this honestly; keep it to +yourself. + Many likelihoods inform'd me of this before, which hung so + tott'ring in the balance that I could neither believe nor + misdoubt. Pray you leave me. Stall this in your bosom; and I + thank you for your honest care. I will speak with you further + anon. Exit STEWARD + + Enter HELENA + + Even so it was with me when I was young. + If ever we are nature's, these are ours; this thorn + Doth to our rose of youth rightly belong; + Our blood to us, this to our blood is born. + It is the show and seal of nature's truth, + Where love's strong passion is impress'd in youth. + By our remembrances of days foregone, + Such were our faults, or then we thought them none. + Her eye is sick on't; I observe her now. + HELENA. What is your pleasure, madam? + COUNTESS. You know, Helen, + I am a mother to you. + HELENA. Mine honourable mistress. + COUNTESS. Nay, a mother. + Why not a mother? When I said 'a mother,' + Methought you saw a serpent. What's in 'mother' + That you start at it? I say I am your mother, + And put you in the catalogue of those + That were enwombed mine. 'Tis often seen + Adoption strives with nature, and choice breeds + A native slip to us from foreign seeds. + You ne'er oppress'd me with a mother's groan, + Yet I express to you a mother's care. + God's mercy, maiden! does it curd thy blood + To say I am thy mother? What's the matter, + That this distempered messenger of wet, + The many-colour'd Iris, rounds thine eye? + Why, that you are my daughter? + HELENA. That I am not. + COUNTESS. I say I am your mother. + HELENA. Pardon, madam. + The Count Rousillon cannot be my brother: + I am from humble, he from honoured name; + No note upon my parents, his all noble. + My master, my dear lord he is; and I + His servant live, and will his vassal die. + He must not be my brother. + COUNTESS. Nor I your mother? + HELENA. You are my mother, madam; would you were- + So that my lord your son were not my brother- + Indeed my mother! Or were you both our mothers, + I care no more for than I do for heaven, + So I were not his sister. Can't no other, + But, I your daughter, he must be my brother? + COUNTESS. Yes, Helen, you might be my daughter-in-law. + God shield you mean it not! 'daughter' and 'mother' + So strive upon your pulse. What! pale again? + My fear hath catch'd your fondness. Now I see + The myst'ry of your loneliness, and find + Your salt tears' head. Now to all sense 'tis gross + You love my son; invention is asham'd, + Against the proclamation of thy passion, + To say thou dost not. Therefore tell me true; + But tell me then, 'tis so; for, look, thy cheeks + Confess it, th' one to th' other; and thine eyes + See it so grossly shown in thy behaviours + That in their kind they speak it; only sin + And hellish obstinacy tie thy tongue, + That truth should be suspected. Speak, is't so? + If it be so, you have wound a goodly clew; + If it be not, forswear't; howe'er, I charge thee, + As heaven shall work in me for thine avail, + To tell me truly. + HELENA. Good madam, pardon me. + COUNTESS. Do you love my son? + HELENA. Your pardon, noble mistress. + COUNTESS. Love you my son? + HELENA. Do not you love him, madam? + COUNTESS. Go not about; my love hath in't a bond + Whereof the world takes note. Come, come, disclose + The state of your affection; for your passions + Have to the full appeach'd. + HELENA. Then I confess, + Here on my knee, before high heaven and you, + That before you, and next unto high heaven, + I love your son. + My friends were poor, but honest; so's my love. + Be not offended, for it hurts not him + That he is lov'd of me; I follow him not + By any token of presumptuous suit, + Nor would I have him till I do deserve him; + Yet never know how that desert should be. + I know I love in vain, strive against hope; + Yet in this captious and intenible sieve + I still pour in the waters of my love, + And lack not to lose still. Thus, Indian-like, + Religious in mine error, I adore + The sun that looks upon his worshipper + But knows of him no more. My dearest madam, + Let not your hate encounter with my love, + For loving where you do; but if yourself, + Whose aged honour cites a virtuous youth, + Did ever in so true a flame of liking + Wish chastely and love dearly that your Dian + Was both herself and Love; O, then, give pity + To her whose state is such that cannot choose + But lend and give where she is sure to lose; + That seeks not to find that her search implies, + But, riddle-like, lives sweetly where she dies! + COUNTESS. Had you not lately an intent-speak truly- + To go to Paris? + HELENA. Madam, I had. + COUNTESS. Wherefore? Tell true. + HELENA. I will tell truth; by grace itself I swear. + You know my father left me some prescriptions + Of rare and prov'd effects, such as his reading + And manifest experience had collected + For general sovereignty; and that he will'd me + In heedfull'st reservation to bestow them, + As notes whose faculties inclusive were + More than they were in note. Amongst the rest + There is a remedy, approv'd, set down, + To cure the desperate languishings whereof + The King is render'd lost. + COUNTESS. This was your motive + For Paris, was it? Speak. + HELENA. My lord your son made me to think of this, + Else Paris, and the medicine, and the King, + Had from the conversation of my thoughts + Haply been absent then. + COUNTESS. But think you, Helen, + If you should tender your supposed aid, + He would receive it? He and his physicians + Are of a mind: he, that they cannot help him; + They, that they cannot help. How shall they credit + A poor unlearned virgin, when the schools, + Embowell'd of their doctrine, have let off + The danger to itself? + HELENA. There's something in't + More than my father's skill, which was the great'st + Of his profession, that his good receipt + Shall for my legacy be sanctified + By th' luckiest stars in heaven; and, would your honour + But give me leave to try success, I'd venture + The well-lost life of mine on his Grace's cure. + By such a day and hour. + COUNTESS. Dost thou believe't? + HELENA. Ay, madam, knowingly. + COUNTESS. Why, Helen, thou shalt have my leave and love, + Means and attendants, and my loving greetings + To those of mine in court. I'll stay at home, + And pray God's blessing into thy attempt. + Be gone to-morrow; and be sure of this, + What I can help thee to thou shalt not miss. Exeunt + + + +<<THIS ELECTRONIC VERSION OF THE COMPLETE WORKS OF WILLIAM +SHAKESPEARE IS COPYRIGHT 1990-1993 BY WORLD LIBRARY, INC., AND IS +PROVIDED BY PROJECT GUTENBERG ETEXT OF CARNEGIE MELLON UNIVERSITY +WITH PERMISSION. ELECTRONIC AND MACHINE READABLE COPIES MAY BE +DISTRIBUTED SO LONG AS SUCH COPIES (1) ARE FOR YOUR OR OTHERS +PERSONAL USE ONLY, AND (2) ARE NOT DISTRIBUTED OR USED +COMMERCIALLY. PROHIBITED COMMERCIAL DISTRIBUTION INCLUDES BY ANY +SERVICE THAT CHARGES FOR DOWNLOAD TIME OR FOR MEMBERSHIP.>> + + + + +ACT II. SCENE 1. +Paris. The KING'S palace + +Flourish of cornets. Enter the KING with divers young LORDS +taking leave +for the Florentine war; BERTRAM and PAROLLES; ATTENDANTS + + KING. Farewell, young lords; these war-like principles + Do not throw from you. And you, my lords, farewell; + Share the advice betwixt you; if both gain all, + The gift doth stretch itself as 'tis receiv'd, + And is enough for both. + FIRST LORD. 'Tis our hope, sir, + After well-ent'red soldiers, to return + And find your Grace in health. + KING. No, no, it cannot be; and yet my heart + Will not confess he owes the malady + That doth my life besiege. Farewell, young lords; + Whether I live or die, be you the sons + Of worthy Frenchmen; let higher Italy- + Those bated that inherit but the fall + Of the last monarchy-see that you come + Not to woo honour, but to wed it; when + The bravest questant shrinks, find what you seek, + That fame may cry you aloud. I say farewell. + SECOND LORD. Health, at your bidding, serve your Majesty! + KING. Those girls of Italy, take heed of them; + They say our French lack language to deny, + If they demand; beware of being captives + Before you serve. + BOTH. Our hearts receive your warnings. + KING. Farewell. [To ATTENDANTS] Come hither to me. + The KING retires attended + FIRST LORD. O my sweet lord, that you will stay behind us! + PAROLLES. 'Tis not his fault, the spark. + SECOND LORD. O, 'tis brave wars! + PAROLLES. Most admirable! I have seen those wars. + BERTRAM. I am commanded here and kept a coil with + 'Too young' and next year' and "Tis too early.' + PAROLLES. An thy mind stand to 't, boy, steal away bravely. + BERTRAM. I shall stay here the forehorse to a smock, + Creaking my shoes on the plain masonry, + Till honour be bought up, and no sword worn + But one to dance with. By heaven, I'll steal away. + FIRST LORD. There's honour in the theft. + PAROLLES. Commit it, Count. + SECOND LORD. I am your accessary; and so farewell. + BERTRAM. I grow to you, and our parting is a tortur'd body. + FIRST LORD. Farewell, Captain. + SECOND LORD. Sweet Monsieur Parolles! + PAROLLES. Noble heroes, my sword and yours are kin. Good sparks +and + lustrous, a word, good metals: you shall find in the regiment +of + the Spinii one Captain Spurio, with his cicatrice, an emblem +of + war, here on his sinister cheek; it was this very sword + entrench'd it. Say to him I live; and observe his reports for +me. + FIRST LORD. We shall, noble Captain. + PAROLLES. Mars dote on you for his novices! Exeunt LORDS + What will ye do? + + Re-enter the KING + + BERTRAM. Stay; the King! + PAROLLES. Use a more spacious ceremony to the noble lords; you +have + restrain'd yourself within the list of too cold an adieu. Be +more + expressive to them; for they wear themselves in the cap of +the + time; there do muster true gait; eat, speak, and move, under +the + influence of the most receiv'd star; and though the devil +lead + the measure, such are to be followed. After them, and take a +more + dilated farewell. + BERTRAM. And I will do so. + PAROLLES. Worthy fellows; and like to prove most sinewy +sword-men. + Exeunt BERTRAM and PAROLLES + + Enter LAFEU + + LAFEU. [Kneeling] Pardon, my lord, for me and for my tidings. + KING. I'll fee thee to stand up. + LAFEU. Then here's a man stands that has brought his pardon. + I would you had kneel'd, my lord, to ask me mercy; + And that at my bidding you could so stand up. + KING. I would I had; so I had broke thy pate, + And ask'd thee mercy for't. + LAFEU. Good faith, across! + But, my good lord, 'tis thus: will you be cur'd + Of your infirmity? + KING. No. + LAFEU. O, will you eat + No grapes, my royal fox? Yes, but you will + My noble grapes, an if my royal fox + Could reach them: I have seen a medicine + That's able to breathe life into a stone, + Quicken a rock, and make you dance canary + With spritely fire and motion; whose simple touch + Is powerful to araise King Pepin, nay, + To give great Charlemain a pen in's hand + And write to her a love-line. + KING. What her is this? + LAFEU. Why, Doctor She! My lord, there's one arriv'd, + If you will see her. Now, by my faith and honour, + If seriously I may convey my thoughts + In this my light deliverance, I have spoke + With one that in her sex, her years, profession, + Wisdom, and constancy, hath amaz'd me more + Than I dare blame my weakness. Will you see her, + For that is her demand, and know her business? + That done, laugh well at me. + KING. Now, good Lafeu, + Bring in the admiration, that we with the + May spend our wonder too, or take off thine + By wond'ring how thou took'st it. + LAFEU. Nay, I'll fit you, + And not be all day neither. Exit LAFEU + KING. Thus he his special nothing ever prologues. + + Re-enter LAFEU with HELENA + + LAFEU. Nay, come your ways. + KING. This haste hath wings indeed. + LAFEU. Nay, come your ways; + This is his Majesty; say your mind to him. + A traitor you do look like; but such traitors + His Majesty seldom fears. I am Cressid's uncle, + That dare leave two together. Fare you well. Exit + KING. Now, fair one, does your business follow us? + HELENA. Ay, my good lord. + Gerard de Narbon was my father, + In what he did profess, well found. + KING. I knew him. + HELENA. The rather will I spare my praises towards him; + Knowing him is enough. On's bed of death + Many receipts he gave me; chiefly one, + Which, as the dearest issue of his practice, + And of his old experience th' only darling, + He bade me store up as a triple eye, + Safer than mine own two, more dear. I have so: + And, hearing your high Majesty is touch'd + With that malignant cause wherein the honour + Of my dear father's gift stands chief in power, + I come to tender it, and my appliance, + With all bound humbleness. + KING. We thank you, maiden; + But may not be so credulous of cure, + When our most learned doctors leave us, and + The congregated college have concluded + That labouring art can never ransom nature + From her inaidable estate-I say we must not + So stain our judgment, or corrupt our hope, + To prostitute our past-cure malady + To empirics; or to dissever so + Our great self and our credit to esteem + A senseless help, when help past sense we deem. + HELENA. My duty then shall pay me for my pains. + I will no more enforce mine office on you; + Humbly entreating from your royal thoughts + A modest one to bear me back again. + KING. I cannot give thee less, to be call'd grateful. + Thou thought'st to help me; and such thanks I give + As one near death to those that wish him live. + But what at full I know, thou know'st no part; + I knowing all my peril, thou no art. + HELENA. What I can do can do no hurt to try, + Since you set up your rest 'gainst remedy. + He that of greatest works is finisher + Oft does them by the weakest minister. + So holy writ in babes hath judgment shown, + When judges have been babes. Great floods have flown + From simple sources, and great seas have dried + When miracles have by the greatest been denied. + Oft expectation fails, and most oft there + Where most it promises; and oft it hits + Where hope is coldest, and despair most fits. + KING. I must not hear thee. Fare thee well, kind maid; + Thy pains, not us'd, must by thyself be paid; + Proffers not took reap thanks for their reward. + HELENA. Inspired merit so by breath is barr'd. + It is not so with Him that all things knows, + As 'tis with us that square our guess by shows; + But most it is presumption in us when + The help of heaven we count the act of men. + Dear sir, to my endeavours give consent; + Of heaven, not me, make an experiment. + I am not an impostor, that proclaim + Myself against the level of mine aim; + But know I think, and think I know most sure, + My art is not past power nor you past cure. + KING. Art thou so confident? Within what space + Hop'st thou my cure? + HELENA. The greatest Grace lending grace. + Ere twice the horses of the sun shall bring + Their fiery torcher his diurnal ring, + Ere twice in murk and occidental damp + Moist Hesperus hath quench'd his sleepy lamp, + Or four and twenty times the pilot's glass + Hath told the thievish minutes how they pass, + What is infirm from your sound parts shall fly, + Health shall live free, and sickness freely die. + KING. Upon thy certainty and confidence + What dar'st thou venture? + HELENA. Tax of impudence, + A strumpet's boldness, a divulged shame, + Traduc'd by odious ballads; my maiden's name + Sear'd otherwise; ne worse of worst-extended + With vilest torture let my life be ended. + KING. Methinks in thee some blessed spirit doth speak + His powerful sound within an organ weak; + And what impossibility would slay + In common sense, sense saves another way. + Thy life is dear; for all that life can rate + Worth name of life in thee hath estimate: + Youth, beauty, wisdom, courage, all + That happiness and prime can happy call. + Thou this to hazard needs must intimate + Skill infinite or monstrous desperate. + Sweet practiser, thy physic I will try, + That ministers thine own death if I die. + HELENA. If I break time, or flinch in property + Of what I spoke, unpitied let me die; + And well deserv'd. Not helping, death's my fee; + But, if I help, what do you promise me? + KING. Make thy demand. + HELENA. But will you make it even? + KING. Ay, by my sceptre and my hopes of heaven. + HELENA. Then shalt thou give me with thy kingly hand + What husband in thy power I will command. + Exempted be from me the arrogance + To choose from forth the royal blood of France, + My low and humble name to propagate + With any branch or image of thy state; + But such a one, thy vassal, whom I know + Is free for me to ask, thee to bestow. + KING. Here is my hand; the premises observ'd, + Thy will by my performance shall be serv'd. + So make the choice of thy own time, for I, + Thy resolv'd patient, on thee still rely. + More should I question thee, and more I must, + Though more to know could not be more to trust, + From whence thou cam'st, how tended on. But rest + Unquestion'd welcome and undoubted blest. + Give me some help here, ho! If thou proceed + As high as word, my deed shall match thy deed. + [Flourish. Exeunt] + + + + +ACT II. SCENE 2. +Rousillon. The COUNT'S palace + +Enter COUNTESS and CLOWN + + COUNTESS. Come on, sir; I shall now put you to the height of +your + breeding. + CLOWN. I will show myself highly fed and lowly taught. I know +my + business is but to the court. + COUNTESS. To the court! Why, what place make you special, when +you + put off that with such contempt? But to the court! + CLOWN. Truly, madam, if God have lent a man any manners, he may + easily put it off at court. He that cannot make a leg, put +off's + cap, kiss his hand, and say nothing, has neither leg, hands, +lip, + nor cap; and indeed such a fellow, to say precisely, were not +for + the court; but for me, I have an answer will serve all men. + COUNTESS. Marry, that's a bountiful answer that fits all +questions. + CLOWN. It is like a barber's chair, that fits all buttocks-the +pin + buttock, the quatch buttock, the brawn buttock, or any +buttock. + COUNTESS. Will your answer serve fit to all questions? + CLOWN. As fit as ten groats is for the hand of an attorney, as +your + French crown for your taffety punk, as Tib's rush for Tom's + forefinger, as a pancake for Shrove Tuesday, a morris for +Mayday, + as the nail to his hole, the cuckold to his horn, as a +scolding + quean to a wrangling knave, as the nun's lip to the friar's + mouth; nay, as the pudding to his skin. + COUNTESS. Have you, I, say, an answer of such fitness for all + questions? + CLOWN. From below your duke to beneath your constable, it will +fit + any question. + COUNTESS. It must be an answer of most monstrous size that must +fit + all demands. + CLOWN. But a trifle neither, in good faith, if the learned +should + speak truth of it. Here it is, and all that belongs to't. Ask +me + if I am a courtier: it shall do you no harm to learn. + COUNTESS. To be young again, if we could, I will be a fool in + question, hoping to be the wiser by your answer. I pray you, +sir, + are you a courtier? + CLOWN. O Lord, sir!-There's a simple putting off. More, more, a + hundred of them. + COUNTESS. Sir, I am a poor friend of yours, that loves you. + CLOWN. O Lord, sir!-Thick, thick; spare not me. + COUNTESS. I think, sir, you can eat none of this homely meat. + CLOWN. O Lord, sir!-Nay, put me to't, I warrant you. + COUNTESS. You were lately whipp'd, sir, as I think. + CLOWN. O Lord, sir!-Spare not me. + COUNTESS. Do you cry 'O Lord, sir!' at your whipping, and +'spare + not me'? Indeed your 'O Lord, sir!' is very sequent to your + whipping. You would answer very well to a whipping, if you +were + but bound to't. + CLOWN. I ne'er had worse luck in my life in my 'O Lord, sir!' I +see + thing's may serve long, but not serve ever. + COUNTESS. I play the noble housewife with the time, + To entertain it so merrily with a fool. + CLOWN. O Lord, sir!-Why, there't serves well again. + COUNTESS. An end, sir! To your business: give Helen this, + And urge her to a present answer back; + Commend me to my kinsmen and my son. This is not much. + CLOWN. Not much commendation to them? + COUNTESS. Not much employment for you. You understand me? + CLOWN. Most fruitfully; I am there before my legs. + COUNTESS. Haste you again. Exeunt + + + + +ACT II. SCENE 3. +Paris. The KING'S palace + +Enter BERTRAM, LAFEU, and PAROLLES + + LAFEU. They say miracles are past; and we have our +philosophical + persons to make modern and familiar things supernatural and + causeless. Hence is it that we make trifles of terrors, + ensconcing ourselves into seeming knowledge when we should +submit + ourselves to an unknown fear. + PAROLLES. Why, 'tis the rarest argument of wonder that hath +shot + out in our latter times. + BERTRAM. And so 'tis. + LAFEU. To be relinquish'd of the artists- + PAROLLES. So I say-both of Galen and Paracelsus. + LAFEU. Of all the learned and authentic fellows- + PAROLLES. Right; so I say. + LAFEU. That gave him out incurable- + PAROLLES. Why, there 'tis; so say I too. + LAFEU. Not to be help'd- + PAROLLES. Right; as 'twere a man assur'd of a- + LAFEU. Uncertain life and sure death. + PAROLLES. Just; you say well; so would I have said. + LAFEU. I may truly say it is a novelty to the world. + PAROLLES. It is indeed. If you will have it in showing, you +shall + read it in what-do-ye-call't here. + LAFEU. [Reading the ballad title] 'A Showing of a Heavenly + Effect in an Earthly Actor.' + PAROLLES. That's it; I would have said the very same. + LAFEU. Why, your dolphin is not lustier. 'Fore me, I speak in + respect- + PAROLLES. Nay, 'tis strange, 'tis very strange; that is the +brief + and the tedious of it; and he's of a most facinerious spirit +that + will not acknowledge it to be the- + LAFEU. Very hand of heaven. + PAROLLES. Ay; so I say. + LAFEU. In a most weak- + PAROLLES. And debile minister, great power, great +transcendence; + which should, indeed, give us a further use to be made than +alone + the recov'ry of the King, as to be- + LAFEU. Generally thankful. + + Enter KING, HELENA, and ATTENDANTS + + PAROLLES. I would have said it; you say well. Here comes the +King. + LAFEU. Lustig, as the Dutchman says. I'll like a maid the +better, + whilst I have a tooth in my head. Why, he's able to lead her +a + coranto. + PAROLLES. Mort du vinaigre! Is not this Helen? + LAFEU. 'Fore God, I think so. + KING. Go, call before me all the lords in court. + Exit an ATTENDANT + Sit, my preserver, by thy patient's side; + And with this healthful hand, whose banish'd sense + Thou has repeal'd, a second time receive + The confirmation of my promis'd gift, + Which but attends thy naming. + + Enter three or four LORDS + + Fair maid, send forth thine eye. This youthful parcel + Of noble bachelors stand at my bestowing, + O'er whom both sovereign power and father's voice + I have to use. Thy frank election make; + Thou hast power to choose, and they none to forsake. + HELENA. To each of you one fair and virtuous mistress + Fall, when love please. Marry, to each but one! + LAFEU. I'd give bay Curtal and his furniture + My mouth no more were broken than these boys', + And writ as little beard. + KING. Peruse them well. + Not one of those but had a noble father. + HELENA. Gentlemen, + Heaven hath through me restor'd the King to health. + ALL. We understand it, and thank heaven for you. + HELENA. I am a simple maid, and therein wealthiest + That I protest I simply am a maid. + Please it your Majesty, I have done already. + The blushes in my cheeks thus whisper me: + 'We blush that thou shouldst choose; but, be refused, + Let the white death sit on thy cheek for ever, + We'll ne'er come there again.' + KING. Make choice and see: + Who shuns thy love shuns all his love in me. + HELENA. Now, Dian, from thy altar do I fly, + And to imperial Love, that god most high, + Do my sighs stream. Sir, will you hear my suit? + FIRST LORD. And grant it. + HELENA. Thanks, sir; all the rest is mute. + LAFEU. I had rather be in this choice than throw ames-ace for +my + life. + HELENA. The honour, sir, that flames in your fair eyes, + Before I speak, too threat'ningly replies. + Love make your fortunes twenty times above + Her that so wishes, and her humble love! + SECOND LORD. No better, if you please. + HELENA. My wish receive, + Which great Love grant; and so I take my leave. + LAFEU. Do all they deny her? An they were sons of mine I'd have + them whipt; or I would send them to th' Turk to make eunuchs +of. + HELENA. Be not afraid that I your hand should take; + I'll never do you wrong for your own sake. + Blessing upon your vows; and in your bed + Find fairer fortune, if you ever wed! + LAFEU. These boys are boys of ice; they'll none have her. + Sure, they are bastards to the English; the French ne'er got +'em. + HELENA. You are too young, too happy, and too good, + To make yourself a son out of my blood. + FOURTH LORD. Fair one, I think not so. + LAFEU. There's one grape yet; I am sure thy father drunk +wine-but + if thou be'st not an ass, I am a youth of fourteen; I have +known + thee already. + HELENA. [To BERTRAM] I dare not say I take you; but I give + Me and my service, ever whilst I live, + Into your guiding power. This is the man. + KING. Why, then, young Bertram, take her; she's thy wife. + BERTRAM. My wife, my liege! I shall beseech your Highness, + In such a business give me leave to use + The help of mine own eyes. + KING. Know'st thou not, Bertram, + What she has done for me? + BERTRAM. Yes, my good lord; + But never hope to know why I should marry her. + KING. Thou know'st she has rais'd me from my sickly bed. + BERTRAM. But follows it, my lord, to bring me down + Must answer for your raising? I know her well: + She had her breeding at my father's charge. + A poor physician's daughter my wife! Disdain + Rather corrupt me ever! + KING. 'Tis only title thou disdain'st in her, the which + I can build up. Strange is it that our bloods, + Of colour, weight, and heat, pour'd all together, + Would quite confound distinction, yet stand off + In differences so mighty. If she be + All that is virtuous-save what thou dislik'st, + A poor physician's daughter-thou dislik'st + Of virtue for the name; but do not so. + From lowest place when virtuous things proceed, + The place is dignified by the doer's deed; + Where great additions swell's, and virtue none, + It is a dropsied honour. Good alone + Is good without a name. Vileness is so: + The property by what it is should go, + Not by the title. She is young, wise, fair; + In these to nature she's immediate heir; + And these breed honour. That is honour's scorn + Which challenges itself as honour's born + And is not like the sire. Honours thrive + When rather from our acts we them derive + Than our fore-goers. The mere word's a slave, + Debauch'd on every tomb, on every grave + A lying trophy; and as oft is dumb + Where dust and damn'd oblivion is the tomb + Of honour'd bones indeed. What should be said? + If thou canst like this creature as a maid, + I can create the rest. Virtue and she + Is her own dower; honour and wealth from me. + BERTRAM. I cannot love her, nor will strive to do 't. + KING. Thou wrong'st thyself, if thou shouldst strive to choose. + HELENA. That you are well restor'd, my lord, I'm glad. + Let the rest go. + KING. My honour's at the stake; which to defeat, + I must produce my power. Here, take her hand, + Proud scornful boy, unworthy this good gift, + That dost in vile misprision shackle up + My love and her desert; that canst not dream + We, poising us in her defective scale, + Shall weigh thee to the beam; that wilt not know + It is in us to plant thine honour where + We please to have it grow. Check thy contempt; + Obey our will, which travails in thy good; + Believe not thy disdain, but presently + Do thine own fortunes that obedient right + Which both thy duty owes and our power claims; + Or I will throw thee from my care for ever + Into the staggers and the careless lapse + Of youth and ignorance; both my revenge and hate + Loosing upon thee in the name of justice, + Without all terms of pity. Speak; thine answer. + BERTRAM. Pardon, my gracious lord; for I submit + My fancy to your eyes. When I consider + What great creation and what dole of honour + Flies where you bid it, I find that she which late + Was in my nobler thoughts most base is now + The praised of the King; who, so ennobled, + Is as 'twere born so. + KING. Take her by the hand, + And tell her she is thine; to whom I promise + A counterpoise, if not to thy estate + A balance more replete. + BERTRAM. I take her hand. + KING. Good fortune and the favour of the King + Smile upon this contract; whose ceremony + Shall seem expedient on the now-born brief, + And be perform'd to-night. The solemn feast + Shall more attend upon the coming space, + Expecting absent friends. As thou lov'st her, + Thy love's to me religious; else, does err. + Exeunt all but LAFEU and PAROLLES who stay behind, + commenting of this wedding + LAFEU. Do you hear, monsieur? A word with you. + PAROLLES. Your pleasure, sir? + LAFEU. Your lord and master did well to make his recantation. + PAROLLES. Recantation! My Lord! my master! + LAFEU. Ay; is it not a language I speak? + PAROLLES. A most harsh one, and not to be understood without +bloody + succeeding. My master! + LAFEU. Are you companion to the Count Rousillon? + PAROLLES. To any count; to all counts; to what is man. + LAFEU. To what is count's man: count's master is of another +style. + PAROLLES. You are too old, sir; let it satisfy you, you are too + old. + LAFEU. I must tell thee, sirrah, I write man; to which title +age + cannot bring thee. + PAROLLES. What I dare too well do, I dare not do. + LAFEU. I did think thee, for two ordinaries, to be a pretty +wise + fellow; thou didst make tolerable vent of thy travel; it +might + pass. Yet the scarfs and the bannerets about thee did +manifoldly + dissuade me from believing thee a vessel of too great a +burden. I + have now found thee; when I lose thee again I care not; yet +art + thou good for nothing but taking up; and that thou'rt scarce + worth. + PAROLLES. Hadst thou not the privilege of antiquity upon thee- + LAFEU. Do not plunge thyself too far in anger, lest thou hasten +thy + trial; which if-Lord have mercy on thee for a hen! So, my +good + window of lattice, fare thee well; thy casement I need not +open, + for I look through thee. Give me thy hand. + PAROLLES. My lord, you give me most egregious indignity. + LAFEU. Ay, with all my heart; and thou art worthy of it. + PAROLLES. I have not, my lord, deserv'd it. + LAFEU. Yes, good faith, ev'ry dram of it; and I will not bate +thee + a scruple. + PAROLLES. Well, I shall be wiser. + LAFEU. Ev'n as soon as thou canst, for thou hast to pull at a +smack + o' th' contrary. If ever thou be'st bound in thy scarf and + beaten, thou shalt find what it is to be proud of thy +bondage. I + have a desire to hold my acquaintance with thee, or rather my + knowledge, that I may say in the default 'He is a man I +know.' + PAROLLES. My lord, you do me most insupportable vexation. + LAFEU. I would it were hell pains for thy sake, and my poor +doing + eternal; for doing I am past, as I will by thee, in what +motion + age will give me leave. Exit + + PAROLLES. Well, thou hast a son shall take this disgrace off +me: + scurvy, old, filthy, scurvy lord! Well, I must be patient; +there + is no fettering of authority. I'll beat him, by my life, if I +can + meet him with any convenience, an he were double and double a + lord. I'll have no more pity of his age than I would have of- + I'll beat him, and if I could but meet him again. + + Re-enter LAFEU + + LAFEU. Sirrah, your lord and master's married; there's news for + you; you have a new mistress. + PAROLLES. I most unfeignedly beseech your lordship to make some + reservation of your wrongs. He is my good lord: whom I serve + above is my master. + LAFEU. Who? God? + PAROLLES. Ay, sir. + LAFEU. The devil it is that's thy master. Why dost thou garter +up + thy arms o' this fashion? Dost make hose of thy sleeves? Do +other + servants so? Thou wert best set thy lower part where thy nose + stands. By mine honour, if I were but two hours younger, I'd +beat + thee. Methink'st thou art a general offence, and every man +should + beat thee. I think thou wast created for men to breathe + themselves upon thee. + PAROLLES. This is hard and undeserved measure, my lord. + LAFEU. Go to, sir; you were beaten in Italy for picking a +kernel + out of a pomegranate; you are a vagabond, and no true +traveller; + you are more saucy with lords and honourable personages than +the + commission of your birth and virtue gives you heraldry. You +are + not worth another word, else I'd call you knave. I leave you. + Exit + + Enter BERTRAM + + PAROLLES. Good, very, good, it is so then. Good, very good; let +it + be conceal'd awhile. + BERTRAM. Undone, and forfeited to cares for ever! + PAROLLES. What's the matter, sweetheart? + BERTRAM. Although before the solemn priest I have sworn, + I will not bed her. + PAROLLES. What, what, sweetheart? + BERTRAM. O my Parolles, they have married me! + I'll to the Tuscan wars, and never bed her. + PAROLLES. France is a dog-hole, and it no more merits + The tread of a man's foot. To th' wars! + BERTRAM. There's letters from my mother; what th' import is I +know + not yet. + PAROLLES. Ay, that would be known. To th' wars, my boy, to th' + wars! + He wears his honour in a box unseen + That hugs his kicky-wicky here at home, + Spending his manly marrow in her arms, + Which should sustain the bound and high curvet + Of Mars's fiery steed. To other regions! + France is a stable; we that dwell in't jades; + Therefore, to th' war! + BERTRAM. It shall be so; I'll send her to my house, + Acquaint my mother with my hate to her, + And wherefore I am fled; write to the King + That which I durst not speak. His present gift + Shall furnish me to those Italian fields + Where noble fellows strike. War is no strife + To the dark house and the detested wife. + PAROLLES. Will this capriccio hold in thee, art sure? + BERTRAM. Go with me to my chamber and advise me. + I'll send her straight away. To-morrow + I'll to the wars, she to her single sorrow. + PAROLLES. Why, these balls bound; there's noise in it. 'Tis +hard: + A young man married is a man that's marr'd. + Therefore away, and leave her bravely; go. + The King has done you wrong; but, hush, 'tis so. Exeunt + + + + +ACT II. SCENE 4. +Paris. The KING'S palace + +Enter HELENA and CLOWN + + HELENA. My mother greets me kindly; is she well? + CLOWN. She is not well, but yet she has her health; she's very + merry, but yet she is not well. But thanks be given, she's +very + well, and wants nothing i' th' world; but yet she is not +well. + HELENA. If she be very well, what does she ail that she's not +very + well? + CLOWN. Truly, she's very well indeed, but for two things. + HELENA. What two things? + CLOWN. One, that she's not in heaven, whither God send her +quickly! + The other, that she's in earth, from whence God send her +quickly! + + Enter PAROLLES + + PAROLLES. Bless you, my fortunate lady! + HELENA. I hope, sir, I have your good will to have mine own +good + fortunes. + PAROLLES. You had my prayers to lead them on; and to keep them +on, + have them still. O, my knave, how does my old lady? + CLOWN. So that you had her wrinkles and I her money, I would +she + did as you say. + PAROLLES. Why, I say nothing. + CLOWN. Marry, you are the wiser man; for many a man's tongue +shakes + out his master's undoing. To say nothing, to do nothing, to +know + nothing, and to have nothing, is to be a great part of your + title, which is within a very little of nothing. + PAROLLES. Away! th'art a knave. + CLOWN. You should have said, sir, 'Before a knave th'art a +knave'; + that's 'Before me th'art a knave.' This had been truth, sir. + PAROLLES. Go to, thou art a witty fool; I have found thee. + CLOWN. Did you find me in yourself, sir, or were you taught to +find + me? The search, sir, was profitable; and much fool may you +find + in you, even to the world's pleasure and the increase of + laughter. + PAROLLES. A good knave, i' faith, and well fed. + Madam, my lord will go away to-night: + A very serious business calls on him. + The great prerogative and rite of love, + Which, as your due, time claims, he does acknowledge; + But puts it off to a compell'd restraint; + Whose want, and whose delay, is strew'd with sweets, + Which they distil now in the curbed time, + To make the coming hour o'erflow with joy + And pleasure drown the brim. + HELENA. What's his else? + PAROLLES. That you will take your instant leave o' th' King, + And make this haste as your own good proceeding, + Strength'ned with what apology you think + May make it probable need. + HELENA. What more commands he? + PAROLLES. That, having this obtain'd, you presently + Attend his further pleasure. + HELENA. In everything I wait upon his will. + PAROLLES. I shall report it so. + HELENA. I pray you. Exit PAROLLES + Come, sirrah. Exeunt + + + + +ACT II. SCENE 5. +Paris. The KING'S palace + +Enter LAFEU and BERTRAM + + LAFEU. But I hope your lordship thinks not him a soldier. + BERTRAM. Yes, my lord, and of very valiant approof. + LAFEU. You have it from his own deliverance. + BERTRAM. And by other warranted testimony. + LAFEU. Then my dial goes not true; I took this lark for a +bunting. + BERTRAM. I do assure you, my lord, he is very great in +knowledge, + and accordingly valiant. + LAFEU. I have then sinn'd against his experience and +transgress'd + against his valour; and my state that way is dangerous, since +I + cannot yet find in my heart to repent. Here he comes; I pray +you + make us friends; I will pursue the amity + + Enter PAROLLES + + PAROLLES. [To BERTRAM] These things shall be done, sir. + LAFEU. Pray you, sir, who's his tailor? + PAROLLES. Sir! + LAFEU. O, I know him well. Ay, sir; he, sir, 's a good workman, +a + very good tailor. + BERTRAM. [Aside to PAROLLES] Is she gone to the King? + PAROLLES. She is. + BERTRAM. Will she away to-night? + PAROLLES. As you'll have her. + BERTRAM. I have writ my letters, casketed my treasure, + Given order for our horses; and to-night, + When I should take possession of the bride, + End ere I do begin. + LAFEU. A good traveller is something at the latter end of a +dinner; + but one that lies three-thirds and uses a known truth to pass +a + thousand nothings with, should be once heard and thrice +beaten. + God save you, Captain. + BERTRAM. Is there any unkindness between my lord and you, +monsieur? + PAROLLES. I know not how I have deserved to run into my lord's + displeasure. + LAFEU. You have made shift to run into 't, boots and spurs and +all, + like him that leapt into the custard; and out of it you'll +run + again, rather than suffer question for your residence. + BERTRAM. It may be you have mistaken him, my lord. + LAFEU. And shall do so ever, though I took him at's prayers. + Fare you well, my lord; and believe this of me: there can be +no + kernal in this light nut; the soul of this man is his +clothes; + trust him not in matter of heavy consequence; I have kept of +them + tame, and know their natures. Farewell, monsieur; I have +spoken + better of you than you have or will to deserve at my hand; +but we + must do good against evil. Exit + PAROLLES. An idle lord, I swear. + BERTRAM. I think so. + PAROLLES. Why, do you not know him? + BERTRAM. Yes, I do know him well; and common speech + Gives him a worthy pass. Here comes my clog. + + Enter HELENA + + HELENA. I have, sir, as I was commanded from you, + Spoke with the King, and have procur'd his leave + For present parting; only he desires + Some private speech with you. + BERTRAM. I shall obey his will. + You must not marvel, Helen, at my course, + Which holds not colour with the time, nor does + The ministration and required office + On my particular. Prepar'd I was not + For such a business; therefore am I found + So much unsettled. This drives me to entreat you + That presently you take your way for home, + And rather muse than ask why I entreat you; + For my respects are better than they seem, + And my appointments have in them a need + Greater than shows itself at the first view + To you that know them not. This to my mother. + [Giving a letter] + 'Twill be two days ere I shall see you; so + I leave you to your wisdom. + HELENA. Sir, I can nothing say + But that I am your most obedient servant. + BERTRAM. Come, come, no more of that. + HELENA. And ever shall + With true observance seek to eke out that + Wherein toward me my homely stars have fail'd + To equal my great fortune. + BERTRAM. Let that go. + My haste is very great. Farewell; hie home. + HELENA. Pray, sir, your pardon. + BERTRAM. Well, what would you say? + HELENA. I am not worthy of the wealth I owe, + Nor dare I say 'tis mine, and yet it is; + But, like a timorous thief, most fain would steal + What law does vouch mine own. + BERTRAM. What would you have? + HELENA. Something; and scarce so much; nothing, indeed. + I would not tell you what I would, my lord. + Faith, yes: + Strangers and foes do sunder and not kiss. + BERTRAM. I pray you, stay not, but in haste to horse. + HELENA. I shall not break your bidding, good my lord. + BERTRAM. Where are my other men, monsieur? + Farewell! Exit HELENA + + Go thou toward home, where I will never come + Whilst I can shake my sword or hear the drum. + Away, and for our flight. + PAROLLES. Bravely, coragio! Exeunt + + + +<<THIS ELECTRONIC VERSION OF THE COMPLETE WORKS OF WILLIAM +SHAKESPEARE IS COPYRIGHT 1990-1993 BY WORLD LIBRARY, INC., AND IS +PROVIDED BY PROJECT GUTENBERG ETEXT OF CARNEGIE MELLON UNIVERSITY +WITH PERMISSION. ELECTRONIC AND MACHINE READABLE COPIES MAY BE +DISTRIBUTED SO LONG AS SUCH COPIES (1) ARE FOR YOUR OR OTHERS +PERSONAL USE ONLY, AND (2) ARE NOT DISTRIBUTED OR USED +COMMERCIALLY. PROHIBITED COMMERCIAL DISTRIBUTION INCLUDES BY ANY +SERVICE THAT CHARGES FOR DOWNLOAD TIME OR FOR MEMBERSHIP.>> + + + + +ACT III. SCENE 1. +Florence. The DUKE's palace + + Flourish. Enter the DUKE OF FLORENCE, attended; two + FRENCH LORDS, with a TROOP OF SOLDIERS + + DUKE. So that, from point to point, now have you heard + The fundamental reasons of this war; + Whose great decision hath much blood let forth + And more thirsts after. + FIRST LORD. Holy seems the quarrel + Upon your Grace's part; black and fearful + On the opposer. + DUKE. Therefore we marvel much our cousin France + Would in so just a business shut his bosom + Against our borrowing prayers. + SECOND LORD. Good my lord, + The reasons of our state I cannot yield, + But like a common and an outward man + That the great figure of a council frames + By self-unable motion; therefore dare not + Say what I think of it, since I have found + Myself in my incertain grounds to fail + As often as I guess'd. + DUKE. Be it his pleasure. + FIRST LORD. But I am sure the younger of our nature, + That surfeit on their ease, will day by day + Come here for physic. + DUKE. Welcome shall they be + And all the honours that can fly from us + Shall on them settle. You know your places well; + When better fall, for your avails they fell. + To-morrow to th' field. Flourish. Exeunt + + + + +ACT III. SCENE 2. +Rousillon. The COUNT'S palace + +Enter COUNTESS and CLOWN + + COUNTESS. It hath happen'd all as I would have had it, save +that he + comes not along with her. + CLOWN. By my troth, I take my young lord to be a very +melancholy + man. + COUNTESS. By what observance, I pray you? + CLOWN. Why, he will look upon his boot and sing; mend the ruff +and + sing; ask questions and sing; pick his teeth and sing. I know +a + man that had this trick of melancholy sold a goodly manor for +a + song. + COUNTESS. Let me see what he writes, and when he means to come. + [Opening a letter] + CLOWN. I have no mind to Isbel since I was at court. Our old +ling + and our Isbels o' th' country are nothing like your old ling +and + your Isbels o' th' court. The brains of my Cupid's knock'd +out; + and I begin to love, as an old man loves money, with no +stomach. + COUNTESS. What have we here? + CLOWN. E'en that you have there. Exit + + COUNTESS. [Reads] 'I have sent you a daughter-in-law; she +hath + recovered the King and undone me. I have wedded her, not +bedded + her; and sworn to make the "not" eternal. You shall hear I am +run + away; know it before the report come. If there be breadth +enough + in the world, I will hold a long distance. My duty to you. + Your unfortunate son, + BERTRAM.' + This is not well, rash and unbridled boy, + To fly the favours of so good a king, + To pluck his indignation on thy head + By the misprizing of a maid too virtuous + For the contempt of empire. + + Re-enter CLOWN + + CLOWN. O madam, yonder is heavy news within between two +soldiers + and my young lady. + COUNTESS. What is the -matter? + CLOWN. Nay, there is some comfort in the news, some comfort; +your + son will not be kill'd so soon as I thought he would. + COUNTESS. Why should he be kill'd? + CLOWN. So say I, madam, if he run away, as I hear he does the + danger is in standing to 't; that's the loss of men, though +it be + the getting of children. Here they come will tell you more. +For my + part, I only hear your son was run away. Exit + + Enter HELENA and the two FRENCH GENTLEMEN + + SECOND GENTLEMAN. Save you, good madam. + HELENA. Madam, my lord is gone, for ever gone. + FIRST GENTLEMAN. Do not say so. + COUNTESS. Think upon patience. Pray you, gentlemen- + I have felt so many quirks of joy and grief + That the first face of neither, on the start, + Can woman me unto 't. Where is my son, I pray you? + FIRST GENTLEMAN. Madam, he's gone to serve the Duke of +Florence. + We met him thitherward; for thence we came, + And, after some dispatch in hand at court, + Thither we bend again. + HELENA. Look on this letter, madam; here's my passport. + [Reads] 'When thou canst get the ring upon my finger, which + never shall come off, and show me a child begotten of thy +body + that I am father to, then call me husband; but in such a +"then" I + write a "never." + This is a dreadful sentence. + COUNTESS. Brought you this letter, gentlemen? + FIRST GENTLEMAN. Ay, madam; + And for the contents' sake are sorry for our pains. + COUNTESS. I prithee, lady, have a better cheer; + If thou engrossest all the griefs are thine, + Thou robb'st me of a moiety. He was my son; + But I do wash his name out of my blood, + And thou art all my child. Towards Florence is he? + FIRST GENTLEMAN. Ay, madam. + COUNTESS. And to be a soldier? + FIRST GENTLEMAN. Such is his noble purpose; and, believe 't, + The Duke will lay upon him all the honour + That good convenience claims. + COUNTESS. Return you thither? + SECOND GENTLEMAN. Ay, madam, with the swiftest wing of speed. + HELENA. [Reads] 'Till I have no wife, I have nothing in +France.' + 'Tis bitter. + COUNTESS. Find you that there? + HELENA. Ay, madam. + SECOND GENTLEMAN. 'Tis but the boldness of his hand haply, +which + his heart was not consenting to. + COUNTESS. Nothing in France until he have no wife! + There's nothing here that is too good for him + But only she; and she deserves a lord + That twenty such rude boys might tend upon, + And call her hourly mistress. Who was with him? + SECOND GENTLEMAN. A servant only, and a gentleman + Which I have sometime known. + COUNTESS. Parolles, was it not? + SECOND GENTLEMAN. Ay, my good lady, he. + COUNTESS. A very tainted fellow, and full of wickedness. + My son corrupts a well-derived nature + With his inducement. + SECOND GENTLEMAN. Indeed, good lady, + The fellow has a deal of that too much + Which holds him much to have. + COUNTESS. Y'are welcome, gentlemen. + I will entreat you, when you see my son, + To tell him that his sword can never win + The honour that he loses. More I'll entreat you + Written to bear along. + FIRST GENTLEMAN. We serve you, madam, + In that and all your worthiest affairs. + COUNTESS. Not so, but as we change our courtesies. + Will you draw near? Exeunt COUNTESS and GENTLEMEN + HELENA. 'Till I have no wife, I have nothing in France.' + Nothing in France until he has no wife! + Thou shalt have none, Rousillon, none in France + Then hast thou all again. Poor lord! is't I + That chase thee from thy country, and expose + Those tender limbs of thine to the event + Of the non-sparing war? And is it I + That drive thee from the sportive court, where thou + Wast shot at with fair eyes, to be the mark + Of smoky muskets? O you leaden messengers, + That ride upon the violent speed of fire, + Fly with false aim; move the still-piecing air, + That sings with piercing; do not touch my lord. + Whoever shoots at him, I set him there; + Whoever charges on his forward breast, + I am the caitiff that do hold him to't; + And though I kill him not, I am the cause + His death was so effected. Better 'twere + I met the ravin lion when he roar'd + With sharp constraint of hunger; better 'twere + That all the miseries which nature owes + Were mine at once. No; come thou home, Rousillon, + Whence honour but of danger wins a scar, + As oft it loses all. I will be gone. + My being here it is that holds thee hence. + Shall I stay here to do 't? No, no, although + The air of paradise did fan the house, + And angels offic'd all. I will be gone, + That pitiful rumour may report my flight + To consolate thine ear. Come, night; end, day. + For with the dark, poor thief, I'll steal away. Exit + + + + +ACT III. SCENE 3. +Florence. Before the DUKE's palace + +Flourish. Enter the DUKE OF FLORENCE, BERTRAM, PAROLLES, +SOLDIERS, +drum and trumpets + + DUKE. The General of our Horse thou art; and we, + Great in our hope, lay our best love and credence + Upon thy promising fortune. + BERTRAM. Sir, it is + A charge too heavy for my strength; but yet + We'll strive to bear it for your worthy sake + To th' extreme edge of hazard. + DUKE. Then go thou forth; + And Fortune play upon thy prosperous helm, + As thy auspicious mistress! + BERTRAM. This very day, + Great Mars, I put myself into thy file; + Make me but like my thoughts, and I shall prove + A lover of thy drum, hater of love. Exeunt + + + + +ACT III. SCENE 4. +Rousillon. The COUNT'S palace + +Enter COUNTESS and STEWARD + + COUNTESS. Alas! and would you take the letter of her? + Might you not know she would do as she has done + By sending me a letter? Read it again. + STEWARD. [Reads] 'I am Saint Jaques' pilgrim, thither gone. + Ambitious love hath so in me offended + That barefoot plod I the cold ground upon, + With sainted vow my faults to have amended. + Write, write, that from the bloody course of war + My dearest master, your dear son, may hie. + Bless him at home in peace, whilst I from far + His name with zealous fervour sanctify. + His taken labours bid him me forgive; + I, his despiteful Juno, sent him forth + From courtly friends, with camping foes to live, + Where death and danger dogs the heels of worth. + He is too good and fair for death and me; + Whom I myself embrace to set him free.' + COUNTESS. Ah, what sharp stings are in her mildest words! + Rinaldo, you did never lack advice so much + As letting her pass so; had I spoke with her, + I could have well diverted her intents, + Which thus she hath prevented. + STEWARD. Pardon me, madam; + If I had given you this at over-night, + She might have been o'er ta'en; and yet she writes + Pursuit would be but vain. + COUNTESS. What angel shall + Bless this unworthy husband? He cannot thrive, + Unless her prayers, whom heaven delights to hear + And loves to grant, reprieve him from the wrath + Of greatest justice. Write, write, Rinaldo, + To this unworthy husband of his wife; + Let every word weigh heavy of her worth + That he does weigh too light. My greatest grief, + Though little he do feel it, set down sharply. + Dispatch the most convenient messenger. + When haply he shall hear that she is gone + He will return; and hope I may that she, + Hearing so much, will speed her foot again, + Led hither by pure love. Which of them both + Is dearest to me I have no skill in sense + To make distinction. Provide this messenger. + My heart is heavy, and mine age is weak; + Grief would have tears, and sorrow bids me speak. Exeunt + + + + +ACT III. SCENE 5. + +Without the walls of Florence +A tucket afar off. Enter an old WIDOW OF FLORENCE, her daughter +DIANA, +VIOLENTA, and MARIANA, with other CITIZENS + + WIDOW. Nay, come; for if they do approach the city we shall +lose + all the sight. + DIANA. They say the French count has done most honourable +service. + WIDOW. It is reported that he has taken their great'st +commander; + and that with his own hand he slew the Duke's brother. +[Tucket] + We have lost our labour; they are gone a contrary way. Hark! +you + may know by their trumpets. + MARIANA. Come, let's return again, and suffice ourselves with +the + report of it. Well, Diana, take heed of this French earl; the + honour of a maid is her name, and no legacy is so rich as + honesty. + WIDOW. I have told my neighbour how you have been solicited by +a + gentleman his companion. + MARIANA. I know that knave, hang him! one Parolles; a filthy + officer he is in those suggestions for the young earl. Beware +of + them, Diana: their promises, enticements, oaths, tokens, and +all + these engines of lust, are not the things they go under; many +a + maid hath been seduced by them; and the misery is, example, +that + so terrible shows in the wreck of maidenhood, cannot for all +that + dissuade succession, but that they are limed with the twigs +that + threatens them. I hope I need not to advise you further; but +I + hope your own grace will keep you where you are, though there + were no further danger known but the modesty which is so +lost. + DIANA. You shall not need to fear me. + + Enter HELENA in the dress of a pilgrim + + WIDOW. I hope so. Look, here comes a pilgrim. I know she will +lie + at my house: thither they send one another. I'll question +her. + God save you, pilgrim! Whither are bound? + HELENA. To Saint Jaques le Grand. + Where do the palmers lodge, I do beseech you? + WIDOW. At the Saint Francis here, beside the port. + HELENA. Is this the way? + [A march afar] + + WIDOW. Ay, marry, is't. Hark you! They come this way. + If you will tarry, holy pilgrim, + But till the troops come by, + I will conduct you where you shall be lodg'd; + The rather for I think I know your hostess + As ample as myself. + HELENA. Is it yourself? + WIDOW. If you shall please so, pilgrim. + HELENA. I thank you, and will stay upon your leisure. + WIDOW. You came, I think, from France? + HELENA. I did so. + WIDOW. Here you shall see a countryman of yours + That has done worthy service. + HELENA. His name, I pray you. + DIANA. The Count Rousillon. Know you such a one? + HELENA. But by the ear, that hears most nobly of him; + His face I know not. + DIANA. What some'er he is, + He's bravely taken here. He stole from France, + As 'tis reported, for the King had married him + Against his liking. Think you it is so? + HELENA. Ay, surely, mere the truth; I know his lady. + DIANA. There is a gentleman that serves the Count + Reports but coarsely of her. + HELENA. What's his name? + DIANA. Monsieur Parolles. + HELENA. O, I believe with him, + In argument of praise, or to the worth + Of the great Count himself, she is too mean + To have her name repeated; all her deserving + Is a reserved honesty, and that + I have not heard examin'd. + DIANA. Alas, poor lady! + 'Tis a hard bondage to become the wife + Of a detesting lord. + WIDOW. I sweet, good creature, wheresoe'er she is + Her heart weighs sadly. This young maid might do her + A shrewd turn, if she pleas'd. + HELENA. How do you mean? + May be the amorous Count solicits her + In the unlawful purpose. + WIDOW. He does, indeed; + And brokes with all that can in such a suit + Corrupt the tender honour of a maid; + But she is arm'd for him, and keeps her guard + In honestest defence. + + Enter, with drum and colours, BERTRAM, PAROLLES, and the + whole ARMY + + MARIANA. The gods forbid else! + WIDOW. So, now they come. + That is Antonio, the Duke's eldest son; + That, Escalus. + HELENA. Which is the Frenchman? + DIANA. He- + That with the plume; 'tis a most gallant fellow. + I would he lov'd his wife; if he were honester + He were much goodlier. Is't not a handsome gentleman? + HELENA. I like him well. + DIANA. 'Tis pity he is not honest. Yond's that same knave + That leads him to these places; were I his lady + I would poison that vile rascal. + HELENA. Which is he? + DIANA. That jack-an-apes with scarfs. Why is he melancholy? + HELENA. Perchance he's hurt i' th' battle. + PAROLLES. Lose our drum! well. + MARIANA. He's shrewdly vex'd at something. + Look, he has spied us. + WIDOW. Marry, hang you! + MARIANA. And your courtesy, for a ring-carrier! + Exeunt BERTRAM, PAROLLES, and ARMY + WIDOW. The troop is past. Come, pilgrim, I will bring you + Where you shall host. Of enjoin'd penitents + There's four or five, to great Saint Jaques bound, + Already at my house. + HELENA. I humbly thank you. + Please it this matron and this gentle maid + To eat with us to-night; the charge and thanking + Shall be for me, and, to requite you further, + I will bestow some precepts of this virgin, + Worthy the note. + BOTH. We'll take your offer kindly. Exeunt + + + + +ACT III. SCENE 6. +Camp before Florence + +Enter BERTRAM, and the two FRENCH LORDS + + SECOND LORD. Nay, good my lord, put him to't; let him have his +way. + FIRST LORD. If your lordship find him not a hiding, hold me no +more + in your respect. + SECOND LORD. On my life, my lord, a bubble. + BERTRAM. Do you think I am so far deceived in him? + SECOND LORD. Believe it, my lord, in mine own direct knowledge, + without any malice, but to speak of him as my kinsman, he's a + most notable coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly + promise-breaker, the owner of no one good quality worthy your + lordship's entertainment. + FIRST LORD. It were fit you knew him; lest, reposing too far in +his + virtue, which he hath not, he might at some great and trusty + business in a main danger fail you. + BERTRAM. I would I knew in what particular action to try him. + FIRST LORD. None better than to let him fetch off his drum, +which + you hear him so confidently undertake to do. + SECOND LORD. I with a troop of Florentines will suddenly +surprise + him; such I will have whom I am sure he knows not from the +enemy. + We will bind and hoodwink him so that he shall suppose no +other + but that he is carried into the leaguer of the adversaries +when + we bring him to our own tents. Be but your lordship present +at + his examination; if he do not, for the promise of his life +and in + the highest compulsion of base fear, offer to betray you and + deliver all the intelligence in his power against you, and +that + with the divine forfeit of his soul upon oath, never trust my + judgment in anything. + FIRST LORD. O, for the love of laughter, let him fetch his +drum; he + says he has a stratagem for't. When your lordship sees the +bottom + of his success in't, and to what metal this counterfeit lump +of + ore will be melted, if you give him not John Drum's + entertainment, your inclining cannot be removed. Here he +comes. + + Enter PAROLLES + + SECOND LORD. O, for the love of laughter, hinder not the honour +of + his design; let him fetch off his drum in any hand. + BERTRAM. How now, monsieur! This drum sticks sorely in your + disposition. + FIRST LORD. A pox on 't; let it go; 'tis but a drum. + PAROLLES. But a drum! Is't but a drum? A drum so lost! There +was + excellent command: to charge in with our horse upon our own + wings, and to rend our own soldiers! + FIRST LORD. That was not to be blam'd in the command of the + service; it was a disaster of war that Caesar himself could +not + have prevented, if he had been there to command. + BERTRAM. Well, we cannot greatly condemn our success. + Some dishonour we had in the loss of that drum; but it is not +to + be recovered. + PAROLLES. It might have been recovered. + BERTRAM. It might, but it is not now. + PAROLLES. It is to be recovered. But that the merit of service +is + seldom attributed to the true and exact performer, I would +have + that drum or another, or 'hic jacet.' + BERTRAM. Why, if you have a stomach, to't, monsieur. If you +think + your mystery in stratagem can bring this instrument of honour + again into his native quarter, be magnanimous in the +enterprise, + and go on; I will grace the attempt for a worthy exploit. If +you + speed well in it, the Duke shall both speak of it and extend +to + you what further becomes his greatness, even to the utmost + syllable of our worthiness. + PAROLLES. By the hand of a soldier, I will undertake it. + BERTRAM. But you must not now slumber in it. + PAROLLES. I'll about it this evening; and I will presently pen + down my dilemmas, encourage myself in my certainty, put +myself + into my mortal preparation; and by midnight look to hear +further + from me. + BERTRAM. May I be bold to acquaint his Grace you are gone about +it? + PAROLLES. I know not what the success will be, my lord, but the + attempt I vow. + BERTRAM. I know th' art valiant; and, to the possibility of thy +soldiership, + will subscribe for thee. Farewell. + PAROLLES. I love not many words. Exit + SECOND LORD. No more than a fish loves water. Is not this a +strange + fellow, my lord, that so confidently seems to undertake this + business, which he knows is not to be done; damns himself to +do, + and dares better be damn'd than to do 't. + FIRST LORD. You do not know him, my lord, as we do. Certain it +is + that he will steal himself into a man's favour, and for a +week + escape a great deal of discoveries; but when you find him +out, + you have him ever after. + BERTRAM. Why, do you think he will make no deed at all of this +that + so seriously he does address himself unto? + SECOND LORD. None in the world; but return with an invention, +and + clap upon you two or three probable lies. But we have almost + emboss'd him. You shall see his fall to-night; for indeed he +is + not for your lordship's respect. + FIRST LORD. We'll make you some sport with the fox ere we case +him. + He was first smok'd by the old Lord Lafeu. When his disguise +and + he is parted, tell me what a sprat you shall find him; which +you + shall see this very night. + SECOND LORD. I must go look my twigs; he shall be caught. + BERTRAM. Your brother, he shall go along with me. + SECOND LORD. As't please your lordship. I'll leave you. Exit + BERTRAM. Now will I lead you to the house, and show you + The lass I spoke of. + FIRST LORD. But you say she's honest. + BERTRAM. That's all the fault. I spoke with her but once, + And found her wondrous cold; but I sent to her, + By this same coxcomb that we have i' th' wind, + Tokens and letters which she did re-send; + And this is all I have done. She's a fair creature; + Will you go see her? + FIRST LORD. With all my heart, my lord. Exeunt + + + + +ACT III. SCENE 7. +Florence. The WIDOW'S house + +Enter HELENA and WIDOW + + HELENA. If you misdoubt me that I am not she, + I know not how I shall assure you further + But I shall lose the grounds I work upon. + WIDOW. Though my estate be fall'n, I was well born, + Nothing acquainted with these businesses; + And would not put my reputation now + In any staining act. + HELENA. Nor would I wish you. + FIRST give me trust the Count he is my husband, + And what to your sworn counsel I have spoken + Is so from word to word; and then you cannot, + By the good aid that I of you shall borrow, + Err in bestowing it. + WIDOW. I should believe you; + For you have show'd me that which well approves + Y'are great in fortune. + HELENA. Take this purse of gold, + And let me buy your friendly help thus far, + Which I will over-pay and pay again + When I have found it. The Count he woos your daughter + Lays down his wanton siege before her beauty, + Resolv'd to carry her. Let her in fine consent, + As we'll direct her how 'tis best to bear it. + Now his important blood will nought deny + That she'll demand. A ring the County wears + That downward hath succeeded in his house + From son to son some four or five descents + Since the first father wore it. This ring he holds + In most rich choice; yet, in his idle fire, + To buy his will, it would not seem too dear, + Howe'er repented after. + WIDOW. Now I see + The bottom of your purpose. + HELENA. You see it lawful then. It is no more + But that your daughter, ere she seems as won, + Desires this ring; appoints him an encounter; + In fine, delivers me to fill the time, + Herself most chastely absent. After this, + To marry her, I'll add three thousand crowns + To what is pass'd already. + WIDOW. I have yielded. + Instruct my daughter how she shall persever, + That time and place with this deceit so lawful + May prove coherent. Every night he comes + With musics of all sorts, and songs compos'd + To her unworthiness. It nothing steads us + To chide him from our eaves, for he persists + As if his life lay on 't. + HELENA. Why then to-night + Let us assay our plot; which, if it speed, + Is wicked meaning in a lawful deed, + And lawful meaning in a lawful act; + Where both not sin, and yet a sinful fact. + But let's about it. Exeunt + + + +<<THIS ELECTRONIC VERSION OF THE COMPLETE WORKS OF WILLIAM +SHAKESPEARE IS COPYRIGHT 1990-1993 BY WORLD LIBRARY, INC., AND IS +PROVIDED BY PROJECT GUTENBERG ETEXT OF CARNEGIE MELLON UNIVERSITY +WITH PERMISSION. ELECTRONIC AND MACHINE READABLE COPIES MAY BE +DISTRIBUTED SO LONG AS SUCH COPIES (1) ARE FOR YOUR OR OTHERS +PERSONAL USE ONLY, AND (2) ARE NOT DISTRIBUTED OR USED +COMMERCIALLY. PROHIBITED COMMERCIAL DISTRIBUTION INCLUDES BY ANY +SERVICE THAT CHARGES FOR DOWNLOAD TIME OR FOR MEMBERSHIP.>> + + + + +ACT IV. SCENE 1. +Without the Florentine camp + +Enter SECOND FRENCH LORD with five or six other SOLDIERS in +ambush + + SECOND LORD. He can come no other way but by this hedge-corner. + When you sally upon him, speak what terrible language you +will; + though you understand it not yourselves, no matter; for we +must + not seem to understand him, unless some one among us, whom we + must produce for an interpreter. + FIRST SOLDIER. Good captain, let me be th' interpreter. + SECOND LORD. Art not acquainted with him? Knows he not thy +voice? + FIRST SOLDIER. No, sir, I warrant you. + SECOND LORD. But what linsey-woolsey has thou to speak to us +again? + FIRST SOLDIER. E'en such as you speak to me. + SECOND LORD. He must think us some band of strangers i' th' + adversary's entertainment. Now he hath a smack of all + neighbouring languages, therefore we must every one be a man +of + his own fancy; not to know what we speak one to another, so +we + seem to know, is to know straight our purpose: choughs' +language, + gabble enough, and good enough. As for you, interpreter, you +must + seem very politic. But couch, ho! here he comes; to beguile +two + hours in a sleep, and then to return and swear the lies he +forges. + + Enter PAROLLES + + PAROLLES. Ten o'clock. Within these three hours 'twill be time + enough to go home. What shall I say I have done? It must be a + very plausive invention that carries it. They begin to smoke +me; + and disgraces have of late knock'd to often at my door. I +find my + tongue is too foolhardy; but my heart hath the fear of Mars + before it, and of his creatures, not daring the reports of my + tongue. + SECOND LORD. This is the first truth that e'er thine own tongue +was + guilty of. + PAROLLES. What the devil should move me to undertake the +recovery + of this drum, being not ignorant of the impossibility, and + knowing I had no such purpose? I must give myself some hurts, +and + say I got them in exploit. Yet slight ones will not carry it. + They will say 'Came you off with so little?' And great ones I + dare not give. Wherefore, what's the instance? Tongue, I must +put + you into a butterwoman's mouth, and buy myself another of + Bajazet's mule, if you prattle me into these perils. + SECOND LORD. Is it possible he should know what he is, and be +that + he is? + PAROLLES. I would the cutting of my garments would serve the +turn, + or the breaking of my Spanish sword. + SECOND LORD. We cannot afford you so. + PAROLLES. Or the baring of my beard; and to say it was in + stratagem. + SECOND LORD. 'Twould not do. + PAROLLES. Or to drown my clothes, and say I was stripp'd. + SECOND LORD. Hardly serve. + PAROLLES. Though I swore I leap'd from the window of the +citadel- + SECOND LORD. How deep? + PAROLLES. Thirty fathom. + SECOND LORD. Three great oaths would scarce make that be +believed. + PAROLLES. I would I had any drum of the enemy's; I would swear +I + recover'd it. + SECOND LORD. You shall hear one anon. [Alarum within] + PAROLLES. A drum now of the enemy's! + SECOND LORD. Throca movousus, cargo, cargo, cargo. + ALL. Cargo, cargo, cargo, villianda par corbo, cargo. + PAROLLES. O, ransom, ransom! Do not hide mine eyes. + [They blindfold him] + FIRST SOLDIER. Boskos thromuldo boskos. + PAROLLES. I know you are the Muskos' regiment, + And I shall lose my life for want of language. + If there be here German, or Dane, Low Dutch, + Italian, or French, let him speak to me; + I'll discover that which shall undo the Florentine. + FIRST SOLDIER. Boskos vauvado. I understand thee, and can speak +thy + tongue. Kerely-bonto, sir, betake thee to thy faith, for + seventeen poniards are at thy bosom. + PAROLLES. O! + FIRST SOLDIER. O, pray, pray, pray! Manka revania dulche. + SECOND LORD. Oscorbidulchos volivorco. + FIRST SOLDIER. The General is content to spare thee yet; + And, hoodwink'd as thou art, will lead thee on + To gather from thee. Haply thou mayst inform + Something to save thy life. + PAROLLES. O, let me live, + And all the secrets of our camp I'll show, + Their force, their purposes. Nay, I'll speak that + Which you will wonder at. + FIRST SOLDIER. But wilt thou faithfully? + PAROLLES. If I do not, damn me. + FIRST SOLDIER. Acordo linta. + Come on; thou art granted space. + Exit, PAROLLES guarded. A short alarum within + SECOND LORD. Go, tell the Count Rousillon and my brother + We have caught the woodcock, and will keep him muffled + Till we do hear from them. + SECOND SOLDIER. Captain, I will. + SECOND LORD. 'A will betray us all unto ourselves- + Inform on that. + SECOND SOLDIER. So I will, sir. + SECOND LORD. Till then I'll keep him dark and safely lock'd. + Exeunt + + + + +ACT IV. SCENE 2. +Florence. The WIDOW'S house + +Enter BERTRAM and DIANA + + BERTRAM. They told me that your name was Fontibell. + DIANA. No, my good lord, Diana. + BERTRAM. Titled goddess; + And worth it, with addition! But, fair soul, + In your fine frame hath love no quality? + If the quick fire of youth light not your mind, + You are no maiden, but a monument; + When you are dead, you should be such a one + As you are now, for you are cold and stern; + And now you should be as your mother was + When your sweet self was got. + DIANA. She then was honest. + BERTRAM. So should you be. + DIANA. No. + My mother did but duty; such, my lord, + As you owe to your wife. + BERTRAM. No more o'that! + I prithee do not strive against my vows. + I was compell'd to her; but I love thee + By love's own sweet constraint, and will for ever + Do thee all rights of service. + DIANA. Ay, so you serve us + Till we serve you; but when you have our roses + You barely leave our thorns to prick ourselves, + And mock us with our bareness. + BERTRAM. How have I sworn! + DIANA. 'Tis not the many oaths that makes the truth, + But the plain single vow that is vow'd true. + What is not holy, that we swear not by, + But take the High'st to witness. Then, pray you, tell me: + If I should swear by Jove's great attributes + I lov'd you dearly, would you believe my oaths + When I did love you ill? This has no holding, + To swear by him whom I protest to love + That I will work against him. Therefore your oaths + Are words and poor conditions, but unseal'd- + At least in my opinion. + BERTRAM. Change it, change it; + Be not so holy-cruel. Love is holy; + And my integrity ne'er knew the crafts + That you do charge men with. Stand no more off, + But give thyself unto my sick desires, + Who then recovers. Say thou art mine, and ever + My love as it begins shall so persever. + DIANA. I see that men make hopes in such a case + That we'll forsake ourselves. Give me that ring. + BERTRAM. I'll lend it thee, my dear, but have no power + To give it from me. + DIANA. Will you not, my lord? + BERTRAM. It is an honour 'longing to our house, + Bequeathed down from many ancestors; + Which were the greatest obloquy i' th' world + In me to lose. + DIANA. Mine honour's such a ring: + My chastity's the jewel of our house, + Bequeathed down from many ancestors; + Which were the greatest obloquy i' th' world + In me to lose. Thus your own proper wisdom + Brings in the champion Honour on my part + Against your vain assault. + BERTRAM. Here, take my ring; + My house, mine honour, yea, my life, be thine, + And I'll be bid by thee. + DIANA. When midnight comes, knock at my chamber window; + I'll order take my mother shall not hear. + Now will I charge you in the band of truth, + When you have conquer'd my yet maiden bed, + Remain there but an hour, nor speak to me: + My reasons are most strong; and you shall know them + When back again this ring shall be deliver'd. + And on your finger in the night I'll put + Another ring, that what in time proceeds + May token to the future our past deeds. + Adieu till then; then fail not. You have won + A wife of me, though there my hope be done. + BERTRAM. A heaven on earth I have won by wooing thee. + Exit + DIANA. For which live long to thank both heaven and me! + You may so in the end. + My mother told me just how he would woo, + As if she sat in's heart; she says all men + Have the like oaths. He had sworn to marry me + When his wife's dead; therefore I'll lie with him + When I am buried. Since Frenchmen are so braid, + Marry that will, I live and die a maid. + Only, in this disguise, I think't no sin + To cozen him that would unjustly win. Exit + + + + +ACT IV. SCENE 3. +The Florentine camp + +Enter the two FRENCH LORDS, and two or three SOLDIERS + + SECOND LORD. You have not given him his mother's letter? + FIRST LORD. I have deliv'red it an hour since. There is +something + in't that stings his nature; for on the reading it he chang'd + almost into another man. + SECOND LORD. He has much worthy blame laid upon him for shaking +off + so good a wife and so sweet a lady. + FIRST LORD. Especially he hath incurred the everlasting +displeasure + of the King, who had even tun'd his bounty to sing happiness +to + him. I will tell you a thing, but you shall let it dwell +darkly + with you. + SECOND LORD. When you have spoken it, 'tis dead, and I am the +grave + of it. + FIRST LORD. He hath perverted a young gentlewoman here in +Florence, + of a most chaste renown; and this night he fleshes his will +in + the spoil of her honour. He hath given her his monumental +ring, + and thinks himself made in the unchaste composition. + SECOND LORD. Now, God delay our rebellion! As we are ourselves, + + + what things are we! + FIRST LORD. Merely our own traitors. And as in the common +course of + all treasons we still see them reveal themselves till they +attain + to their abhorr'd ends; so he that in this action contrives + against his own nobility, in his proper stream, o'erflows + himself. + SECOND LORD. Is it not meant damnable in us to be trumpeters of +our + unlawful intents? We shall not then have his company +to-night? + FIRST LORD. Not till after midnight; for he is dieted to his +hour. + SECOND LORD. That approaches apace. I would gladly have him see +his + company anatomiz'd, that he might take a measure of his own + judgments, wherein so curiously he had set this counterfeit. + FIRST LORD. We will not meddle with him till he come; for his + presence must be the whip of the other. + SECOND LORD. In the meantime, what hear you of these wars? + FIRST LORD. I hear there is an overture of peace. + SECOND LORD. Nay, I assure you, a peace concluded. + FIRST LORD. What will Count Rousillon do then? Will he travel + higher, or return again into France? + SECOND LORD. I perceive, by this demand, you are not altogether + + + of his counsel. + FIRST LORD. Let it be forbid, sir! So should I be a great deal + of his act. + SECOND LORD. Sir, his wife, some two months since, fled from +his + house. Her pretence is a pilgrimage to Saint Jaques le Grand; + which holy undertaking with most austere sanctimony she + accomplish'd; and, there residing, the tenderness of her +nature + became as a prey to her grief; in fine, made a groan of her +last + breath, and now she sings in heaven. + FIRST LORD. How is this justified? + SECOND LORD. The stronger part of it by her own letters, which + makes her story true even to the point of her death. Her +death + itself, which could not be her office to say is come, was + faithfully confirm'd by the rector of the place. + FIRST LORD. Hath the Count all this intelligence? + SECOND LORD. Ay, and the particular confirmations, point from + point, to the full arming of the verity. + FIRST LORD. I am heartily sorry that he'll be glad of this. + SECOND LORD. How mightily sometimes we make us comforts of our + losses! + FIRST LORD. And how mightily some other times we drown our gain +in + tears! The great dignity that his valour hath here acquir'd +for + him shall at home be encount'red with a shame as ample. + SECOND LORD. The web of our life is of a mingled yarn, good and +ill + together. Our virtues would be proud if our faults whipt them + not; and our crimes would despair if they were not cherish'd +by + our virtues. + + Enter a MESSENGER + + How now? Where's your master? + SERVANT. He met the Duke in the street, sir; of whom he hath +taken + a solemn leave. His lordship will next morning for France. +The + Duke hath offered him letters of commendations to the King. + SECOND LORD. They shall be no more than needful there, if they +were + more than they can commend. + FIRST LORD. They cannot be too sweet for the King's tartness. + Here's his lordship now. + + Enter BERTRAM + + How now, my lord, is't not after midnight? + BERTRAM. I have to-night dispatch'd sixteen businesses, a +month's + length apiece; by an abstract of success: I have congied with +the + Duke, done my adieu with his nearest; buried a wife, mourn'd +for + her; writ to my lady mother I am returning; entertain'd my + convoy; and between these main parcels of dispatch effected +many + nicer needs. The last was the greatest, but that I have not +ended + yet. + SECOND LORD. If the business be of any difficulty and this +morning + your departure hence, it requires haste of your lordship. + BERTRAM. I mean the business is not ended, as fearing to hear +of it + hereafter. But shall we have this dialogue between the Fool +and + the Soldier? Come, bring forth this counterfeit module has + deceiv'd me like a double-meaning prophesier. + SECOND LORD. Bring him forth. [Exeunt SOLDIERS] Has sat i' +th' + stocks all night, poor gallant knave. + BERTRAM. No matter; his heels have deserv'd it, in usurping his + spurs so long. How does he carry himself? + SECOND LORD. I have told your lordship already the stocks carry + + + him. But to answer you as you would be understood: he weeps +like + a wench that had shed her milk; he hath confess'd himself to + Morgan, whom he supposes to be a friar, from the time of his + remembrance to this very instant disaster of his setting i' +th' + stocks. And what think you he hath confess'd? + BERTRAM. Nothing of me, has 'a? + SECOND LORD. His confession is taken, and it shall be read to +his + face; if your lordship be in't, as I believe you are, you +must + have the patience to hear it. + + Enter PAROLLES guarded, and + FIRST SOLDIER as interpreter + + BERTRAM. A plague upon him! muffled! He can say nothing of me. + SECOND LORD. Hush, hush! Hoodman comes. Portotartarossa. + FIRST SOLDIER. He calls for the tortures. What will you say +without + 'em? + PAROLLES. I will confess what I know without constraint; if ye + pinch me like a pasty, I can say no more. + FIRST SOLDIER. Bosko chimurcho. + SECOND LORD. Boblibindo chicurmurco. + FIRST SOLDIER. You are a merciful general. Our General bids you + answer to what I shall ask you out of a note. + PAROLLES. And truly, as I hope to live. + FIRST SOLDIER. 'First demand of him how many horse the Duke is + strong.' What say you to that? + PAROLLES. Five or six thousand; but very weak and +unserviceable. + The troops are all scattered, and the commanders very poor + rogues, upon my reputation and credit, and as I hope to live. + FIRST SOLDIER. Shall I set down your answer so? + PAROLLES. Do; I'll take the sacrament on 't, how and which way +you + will. + BERTRAM. All's one to him. What a past-saving slave is this! + SECOND LORD. Y'are deceiv'd, my lord; this is Monsieur +Parolles, + the gallant militarist-that was his own phrase-that had the +whole + theoric of war in the knot of his scarf, and the practice in +the + chape of his dagger. + FIRST LORD. I will never trust a man again for keeping his +sword + clean; nor believe he can have everything in him by wearing +his + apparel neatly. + FIRST SOLDIER. Well, that's set down. + PAROLLES. 'Five or six thousand horse' I said-I will say true- +'or + thereabouts' set down, for I'll speak truth. + SECOND LORD. He's very near the truth in this. + BERTRAM. But I con him no thanks for't in the nature he +delivers it. + PAROLLES. 'Poor rogues' I pray you say. + FIRST SOLDIER. Well, that's set down. + PAROLLES. I humbly thank you, sir. A truth's a truth-the rogues +are + marvellous poor. + FIRST SOLDIER. 'Demand of him of what strength they are +a-foot.' + What say you to that? + PAROLLES. By my troth, sir, if I were to live this present +hour, I + will tell true. Let me see: Spurio, a hundred and fifty; + Sebastian, so many; Corambus, so many; Jaques, so many; +Guiltian, + Cosmo, Lodowick, and Gratii, two hundred fifty each; mine own + company, Chitopher, Vaumond, Bentii, two hundred fifty each; +so + that the muster-file, rotten and sound, upon my life, amounts +not + to fifteen thousand poll; half of the which dare not shake +the + snow from off their cassocks lest they shake themselves to + pieces. + BERTRAM. What shall be done to him? + SECOND LORD. Nothing, but let him have thanks. Demand of him my + condition, and what credit I have with the Duke. + FIRST SOLDIER. Well, that's set down. 'You shall demand of him + whether one Captain Dumain be i' th' camp, a Frenchman; what +his + reputation is with the Duke, what his valour, honesty, +expertness + in wars; or whether he thinks it were not possible, with + well-weighing sums of gold, to corrupt him to a revolt.' What +say + you to this? What do you know of it? + PAROLLES. I beseech you, let me answer to the particular of the + inter'gatories. Demand them singly. + FIRST SOLDIER. Do you know this Captain Dumain? + PAROLLES. I know him: 'a was a botcher's prentice in Paris, +from + whence he was whipt for getting the shrieve's fool with +child-a + dumb innocent that could not say him nay. + BERTRAM. Nay, by your leave, hold your hands; though I know his + brains are forfeit to the next tile that falls. + FIRST SOLDIER. Well, is this captain in the Duke of Florence's + camp? + PAROLLES. Upon my knowledge, he is, and lousy. + SECOND LORD. Nay, look not so upon me; we shall hear of your + lordship anon. + FIRST SOLDIER. What is his reputation with the Duke? + PAROLLES. The Duke knows him for no other but a poor officer of + mine; and writ to me this other day to turn him out o' th' +band. + I think I have his letter in my pocket. + FIRST SOLDIER. Marry, we'll search. + PAROLLES. In good sadness, I do not know; either it is there or +it + is upon a file with the Duke's other letters in my tent. + FIRST SOLDIER. Here 'tis; here's a paper. Shall I read it to +you? + PAROLLES. I do not know if it be it or no. + BERTRAM. Our interpreter does it well. + SECOND LORD. Excellently. + FIRST SOLDIER. [Reads] 'Dian, the Count's a fool, and full of + gold.' + PAROLLES. That is not the Duke's letter, sir; that is an + advertisement to a proper maid in Florence, one Diana, to +take + heed of the allurement of one Count Rousillon, a foolish idle + boy, but for all that very ruttish. I pray you, sir, put it +up + again. + FIRST SOLDIER. Nay, I'll read it first by your favour. + PAROLLES. My meaning in't, I protest, was very honest in the +behalf + of the maid; for I knew the young Count to be a dangerous and + lascivious boy, who is a whale to virginity, and devours up +all + the fry it finds. + BERTRAM. Damnable both-sides rogue! + FIRST SOLDIER. [Reads] + 'When he swears oaths, bid him drop gold, and take it; + After he scores, he never pays the score. + Half won is match well made; match, and well make it; + He ne'er pays after-debts, take it before. + And say a soldier, Dian, told thee this: + Men are to mell with, boys are not to kiss; + For count of this, the Count's a fool, I know it, + Who pays before, but not when he does owe it. + Thine, as he vow'd to thee in thine ear, + PAROLLES.' + BERTRAM. He shall be whipt through the army with this rhyme +in's + forehead. + FIRST LORD. This is your devoted friend, sir, the manifold + linguist, and the amnipotent soldier. + BERTRAM. I could endure anything before but a cat, and now he's +a + cat to me. + FIRST SOLDIER. I perceive, sir, by our General's looks we shall +be + fain to hang you. + PAROLLES. My life, sir, in any case! Not that I am afraid to +die, + but that, my offences being many, I would repent out the + remainder of nature. Let me live, sir, in a dungeon, i' th' + stocks, or anywhere, so I may live. + FIRST SOLDIER. We'll see what may be done, so you confess +freely; + therefore, once more to this Captain Dumain: you have +answer'd to + his reputation with the Duke, and to his valour; what is his + honesty? + PAROLLES. He will steal, sir, an egg out of a cloister; for +rapes + and ravishments he parallels Nessus. He professes not keeping +of + oaths; in breaking 'em he is stronger than Hercules. He will +lie, + sir, with such volubility that you would think truth were a +fool. + Drunkenness is his best virtue, for he will be swine-drunk; +and + in his sleep he does little harm, save to his bedclothes +about + him; but they know his conditions and lay him in straw. I +have + but little more to say, sir, of his honesty. He has +everything + that an honest man should not have; what an honest man should + have he has nothing. + SECOND LORD. I begin to love him for this. + BERTRAM. For this description of thine honesty? A pox upon him! +For + me, he's more and more a cat. + FIRST SOLDIER. What say you to his expertness in war? + PAROLLES. Faith, sir, has led the drum before the English + tragedians-to belie him I will not-and more of his +soldier-ship + I know not, except in that country he had the honour to be +the + officer at a place there called Mile-end to instruct for the + doubling of files-I would do the man what honour I can-but of + this I am not certain. + SECOND LORD. He hath out-villain'd villainy so far that the +rarity + redeems him. + BERTRAM. A pox on him! he's a cat still. + FIRST SOLDIER. His qualities being at this poor price, I need +not + to ask you if gold will corrupt him to revolt. + PAROLLES. Sir, for a cardecue he will sell the fee-simple of +his + salvation, the inheritance of it; and cut th' entail from all + + + remainders and a perpetual succession for it perpetually. + FIRST SOLDIER. What's his brother, the other Captain Dumain? + FIRST LORD. Why does he ask him of me? + FIRST SOLDIER. What's he? + PAROLLES. E'en a crow o' th' same nest; not altogether so great +as + the first in goodness, but greater a great deal in evil. He + excels his brother for a coward; yet his brother is reputed +one + of the best that is. In a retreat he outruns any lackey: +marry, + in coming on he has the cramp. + FIRST SOLDIER. If your life be saved, will you undertake to +betray + the Florentine? + PAROLLES. Ay, and the Captain of his Horse, Count Rousillon. + FIRST SOLDIER. I'll whisper with the General, and know his + pleasure. + PAROLLES. [Aside] I'll no more drumming. A plague of all +drums! + Only to seem to deserve well, and to beguile the supposition +of + that lascivious young boy the Count, have I run into this +danger. + Yet who would have suspected an ambush where I was taken? + FIRST SOLDIER. There is no remedy, sir, but you must die. + The General says you that have so traitorously discover'd the + + + secrets of your army, and made such pestiferous reports of +men + very nobly held, can serve the world for no honest use; +therefore + you must die. Come, headsman, off with his head. + PAROLLES. O Lord, sir, let me live, or let me see my death! + FIRST SOLDIER. That shall you, and take your leave of all your + friends. [Unmuffling him] So look about you; know you any +here? + BERTRAM. Good morrow, noble Captain. + FIRST LORD. God bless you, Captain Parolles. + SECOND LORD. God save you, noble Captain. + FIRST LORD. Captain, what greeting will you to my Lord Lafeu? I +am + for France. + SECOND LORD. Good Captain, will you give me a copy of the +sonnet + you writ to Diana in behalf of the Count Rousillon? An I were +not + a very coward I'd compel it of you; but fare you well. + Exeunt BERTRAM and LORDS + FIRST SOLDIER. You are undone, Captain, all but your scarf; +that + has a knot on 't yet. + PAROLLES. Who cannot be crush'd with a plot? + FIRST SOLDIER. If you could find out a country where but women +were + that had received so much shame, you might begin an impudent + + nation. Fare ye well, sir; I am for France too; we shall +speak of + you there. Exit with SOLDIERS + PAROLLES. Yet am I thankful. If my heart were great, + 'Twould burst at this. Captain I'll be no more; + But I will eat, and drink, and sleep as soft + As captain shall. Simply the thing I am + Shall make me live. Who knows himself a braggart, + Let him fear this; for it will come to pass + That every braggart shall be found an ass. + Rust, sword; cool, blushes; and, Parolles, live + Safest in shame. Being fool'd, by fool'ry thrive. + There's place and means for every man alive. + I'll after them. Exit + + + + +ACT IV SCENE 4. +The WIDOW'S house + +Enter HELENA, WIDOW, and DIANA + + HELENA. That you may well perceive I have not wrong'd you! + One of the greatest in the Christian world + Shall be my surety; fore whose throne 'tis needful, + Ere I can perfect mine intents, to kneel. + Time was I did him a desired office, + Dear almost as his life; which gratitude + Through flinty Tartar's bosom would peep forth, + And answer 'Thanks.' I duly am inform'd + His Grace is at Marseilles, to which place + We have convenient convoy. You must know + I am supposed dead. The army breaking, + My husband hies him home; where, heaven aiding, + And by the leave of my good lord the King, + We'll be before our welcome. + WIDOW. Gentle madam, + You never had a servant to whose trust + Your business was more welcome. + HELENA. Nor you, mistress, + Ever a friend whose thoughts more truly labour + To recompense your love. Doubt not but heaven + Hath brought me up to be your daughter's dower, + As it hath fated her to be my motive + And helper to a husband. But, O strange men! + That can such sweet use make of what they hate, + When saucy trusting of the cozen'd thoughts + Defiles the pitchy night. So lust doth play + With what it loathes, for that which is away. + But more of this hereafter. You, Diana, + Under my poor instructions yet must suffer + Something in my behalf. + DIANA. Let death and honesty + Go with your impositions, I am yours + Upon your will to suffer. + HELENA. Yet, I pray you: + But with the word the time will bring on summer, + When briers shall have leaves as well as thorns + And be as sweet as sharp. We must away; + Our waggon is prepar'd, and time revives us. + All's Well that Ends Well. Still the fine's the crown. + Whate'er the course, the end is the renown. Exeunt + + + + +ACT IV SCENE 5. +Rousillon. The COUNT'S palace + +Enter COUNTESS, LAFEU, and CLOWN + + LAFEU. No, no, no, your son was misled with a snipt-taffeta +fellow + there, whose villainous saffron would have made all the +unbak'd + and doughy youth of a nation in his colour. Your +daughter-in-law + had been alive at this hour, and your son here at home, more + advanc'd by the King than by that red-tail'd humble-bee I +speak + of. + COUNTESS. I would I had not known him. It was the death of the +most + virtuous gentlewoman that ever nature had praise for +creating. If + she had partaken of my flesh, and cost me the dearest groans +of a + mother, I could not have owed her a more rooted love. + LAFEU. 'Twas a good lady, 'twas a good lady. We may pick a +thousand + sallets ere we light on such another herb. + CLOWN. Indeed, sir, she was the sweet-marjoram of the sallet, +or, + rather, the herb of grace. + LAFEU. They are not sallet-herbs, you knave; they are +nose-herbs. + CLOWN. I am no great Nebuchadnezzar, sir; I have not much skill +in + grass. + LAFEU. Whether dost thou profess thyself-a knave or a fool? + CLOWN. A fool, sir, at a woman's service, and a knave at a +man's. + LAFEU. Your distinction? + CLOWN. I would cozen the man of his wife, and do his service. + LAFEU. So you were a knave at his service, indeed. + CLOWN. And I would give his wife my bauble, sir, to do her +service. + LAFEU. I will subscribe for thee; thou art both knave and fool. + CLOWN. At your service. + LAFEU. No, no, no. + CLOWN. Why, sir, if I cannot serve you, I can serve as great a + prince as you are. + LAFEU. Who's that? A Frenchman? + CLOWN. Faith, sir, 'a has an English name; but his fisnomy is +more + hotter in France than there. + LAFEU. What prince is that? + CLOWN. The Black Prince, sir; alias, the Prince of Darkness; +alias, + the devil. + LAFEU. Hold thee, there's my purse. I give thee not this to +suggest + thee from thy master thou talk'st of; serve him still. + CLOWN. I am a woodland fellow, sir, that always loved a great +fire; + and the master I speak of ever keeps a good fire. But, sure, +he + is the prince of the world; let his nobility remain in's +court. I + am for the house with the narrow gate, which I take to be too + little for pomp to enter. Some that humble themselves may; +but + the many will be too chill and tender: and they'll be for the + flow'ry way that leads to the broad gate and the great fire. + LAFEU. Go thy ways, I begin to be aweary of thee; and I tell +thee + so before, because I would not fall out with thee. Go thy +ways; + let my horses be well look'd to, without any tricks. + CLOWN. If I put any tricks upon 'em, sir, they shall be jades' + tricks, which are their own right by the law of nature. + Exit + LAFEU. A shrewd knave, and an unhappy. + COUNTESS. So 'a is. My lord that's gone made himself much +sport + out of him. By his authority he remains here, which he thinks +is + a patent for his sauciness; and indeed he has no pace, but +runs + where he will. + LAFEU. I like him well; 'tis not amiss. And I was about to tell + you, since I heard of the good lady's death, and that my lord + your son was upon his return home, I moved the King my master +to + speak in the behalf of my daughter; which, in the minority of + them both, his Majesty out of a self-gracious remembrance did + first propose. His Highness hath promis'd me to do it; and, +to + stop up the displeasure he hath conceived against your son, +there + is no fitter matter. How does your ladyship like it? + COUNTESS. With very much content, my lord; and I wish it +happily + effected. + LAFEU. His Highness comes post from Marseilles, of as able body +as + when he number'd thirty; 'a will be here to-morrow, or I am + deceiv'd by him that in such intelligence hath seldom fail'd. + COUNTESS. It rejoices me that I hope I shall see him ere I die. + I have letters that my son will be here to-night. I shall +beseech + your lordship to remain with me till they meet together. + LAFEU. Madam, I was thinking with what manners I might safely +be + admitted. + COUNTESS. You need but plead your honourable privilege. + LAFEU. Lady, of that I have made a bold charter; but, I thank +my + God, it holds yet. + + Re-enter CLOWN + + CLOWN. O madam, yonder's my lord your son with a patch of +velvet + on's face; whether there be a scar under 't or no, the velvet + knows; but 'tis a goodly patch of velvet. His left cheek is a + cheek of two pile and a half, but his right cheek is worn +bare. + LAFEU. A scar nobly got, or a noble scar, is a good liv'ry of + honour; so belike is that. + CLOWN. But it is your carbonado'd face. + LAFEU. Let us go see your son, I pray you; + I long to talk with the young noble soldier. + CLOWN. Faith, there's a dozen of 'em, with delicate fine hats, +and + most courteous feathers, which bow the head and nod at every +man. + Exeunt + + + +<<THIS ELECTRONIC VERSION OF THE COMPLETE WORKS OF WILLIAM +SHAKESPEARE IS COPYRIGHT 1990-1993 BY WORLD LIBRARY, INC., AND IS +PROVIDED BY PROJECT GUTENBERG ETEXT OF CARNEGIE MELLON UNIVERSITY +WITH PERMISSION. ELECTRONIC AND MACHINE READABLE COPIES MAY BE +DISTRIBUTED SO LONG AS SUCH COPIES (1) ARE FOR YOUR OR OTHERS +PERSONAL USE ONLY, AND (2) ARE NOT DISTRIBUTED OR USED +COMMERCIALLY. PROHIBITED COMMERCIAL DISTRIBUTION INCLUDES BY ANY +SERVICE THAT CHARGES FOR DOWNLOAD TIME OR FOR MEMBERSHIP.>> + + + + +ACT V. SCENE 1. +Marseilles. A street + +Enter HELENA, WIDOW, and DIANA, with two ATTENDANTS + + HELENA. But this exceeding posting day and night + Must wear your spirits low; we cannot help it. + But since you have made the days and nights as one, + To wear your gentle limbs in my affairs, + Be bold you do so grow in my requital + As nothing can unroot you. + + Enter a GENTLEMAN + + In happy time! + This man may help me to his Majesty's ear, + If he would spend his power. God save you, sir. + GENTLEMAN. And you. + HELENA. Sir, I have seen you in the court of France. + GENTLEMAN. I have been sometimes there. + HELENA. I do presume, sir, that you are not fall'n + From the report that goes upon your goodness; + And therefore, goaded with most sharp occasions, + Which lay nice manners by, I put you to + The use of your own virtues, for the which + I shall continue thankful. + GENTLEMAN. What's your will? + HELENA. That it will please you + To give this poor petition to the King; + And aid me with that store of power you have + To come into his presence. + GENTLEMAN. The King's not here. + HELENA. Not here, sir? + GENTLEMAN. Not indeed. + He hence remov'd last night, and with more haste + Than is his use. + WIDOW. Lord, how we lose our pains! + HELENA. All's Well That Ends Well yet, + Though time seem so adverse and means unfit. + I do beseech you, whither is he gone? + GENTLEMAN. Marry, as I take it, to Rousillon; + Whither I am going. + HELENA. I do beseech you, sir, + Since you are like to see the King before me, + Commend the paper to his gracious hand; + Which I presume shall render you no blame, + But rather make you thank your pains for it. + I will come after you with what good speed + Our means will make us means. + GENTLEMAN. This I'll do for you. + HELENA. And you shall find yourself to be well thank'd, + Whate'er falls more. We must to horse again; + Go, go, provide. Exeunt + + + + +ACT V SCENE 2. +Rousillon. The inner court of the COUNT'S palace + +Enter CLOWN and PAROLLES + + PAROLLES. Good Monsieur Lavache, give my Lord Lafeu this +letter. I + have ere now, sir, been better known to you, when I have held + familiarity with fresher clothes; but I am now, sir, muddied +in + Fortune's mood, and smell somewhat strong of her strong + displeasure. + CLOWN. Truly, Fortune's displeasure is but sluttish, if it +smell + so strongly as thou speak'st of. I will henceforth eat no +fish + of Fortune's butt'ring. Prithee, allow the wind. + PAROLLES. Nay, you need not to stop your nose, sir; I spake but +by + a metaphor. + CLOWN. Indeed, sir, if your metaphor stink, I will stop my +nose; or + against any man's metaphor. Prithee, get thee further. + PAROLLES. Pray you, sir, deliver me this paper. + CLOWN. Foh! prithee stand away. A paper from Fortune's +close-stool + to give to a nobleman! Look here he comes himself. + + Enter LAFEU + + Here is a pur of Fortune's, sir, or of Fortune's cat, but not + a musk-cat, that has fall'n into the unclean fishpond of her + displeasure, and, as he says, is muddied withal. Pray you, +sir, + use the carp as you may; for he looks like a poor, decayed, + ingenious, foolish, rascally knave. I do pity his distress + in my similes of comfort, and leave him to your lordship. + Exit + PAROLLES. My lord, I am a man whom Fortune hath cruelly +scratch'd. + LAFEU. And what would you have me to do? 'Tis too late to pare +her + nails now. Wherein have you played the knave with Fortune, +that + she should scratch you, who of herself is a good lady and +would + not have knaves thrive long under her? There's a cardecue for + you. Let the justices make you and Fortune friends; I am for + other business. + PAROLLES. I beseech your honour to hear me one single word. + LAFEU. You beg a single penny more; come, you shall ha't; save +your + word. + PAROLLES. My name, my good lord, is Parolles. + LAFEU. You beg more than word then. Cox my passion! give me +your + hand. How does your drum? + PAROLLES. O my good lord, you were the first that found me. + LAFEU. Was I, in sooth? And I was the first that lost thee. + PAROLLES. It lies in you, my lord, to bring me in some grace, +for + you did bring me out. + LAFEU. Out upon thee, knave! Dost thou put upon me at once both +the + office of God and the devil? One brings the in grace, and the + other brings thee out. [Trumpets sound] The King's +coming; I + know by his trumpets. Sirrah, inquire further after me; I had + talk of you last night. Though you are a fool and a knave, +you + shall eat. Go to; follow. + PAROLLES. I praise God for you. Exeunt + + + + +ACT V SCENE 3. +Rousillon. The COUNT'S palace + +Flourish. Enter KING, COUNTESS, LAFEU, the two FRENCH LORDS, with +ATTENDANTS + + KING. We lost a jewel of her, and our esteem + Was made much poorer by it; but your son, + As mad in folly, lack'd the sense to know + Her estimation home. + COUNTESS. 'Tis past, my liege; + And I beseech your Majesty to make it + Natural rebellion, done i' th' blaze of youth, + When oil and fire, too strong for reason's force, + O'erbears it and burns on. + KING. My honour'd lady, + I have forgiven and forgotten all; + Though my revenges were high bent upon him + And watch'd the time to shoot. + LAFEU. This I must say- + But first, I beg my pardon: the young lord + Did to his Majesty, his mother, and his lady, + Offence of mighty note; but to himself + The greatest wrong of all. He lost a wife + Whose beauty did astonish the survey + Of richest eyes; whose words all ears took captive; + Whose dear perfection hearts that scorn'd to serve + Humbly call'd mistress. + KING. Praising what is lost + Makes the remembrance dear. Well, call him hither; + We are reconcil'd, and the first view shall kill + All repetition. Let him not ask our pardon; + The nature of his great offence is dead, + And deeper than oblivion do we bury + Th' incensing relics of it; let him approach, + A stranger, no offender; and inform him + So 'tis our will he should. + GENTLEMAN. I shall, my liege. Exit GENTLEMAN + KING. What says he to your daughter? Have you spoke? + LAFEU. All that he is hath reference to your Highness. + KING. Then shall we have a match. I have letters sent me + That sets him high in fame. + + Enter BERTRAM + + LAFEU. He looks well on 't. + KING. I am not a day of season, + For thou mayst see a sunshine and a hail + In me at once. But to the brightest beams + Distracted clouds give way; so stand thou forth; + The time is fair again. + BERTRAM. My high-repented blames, + Dear sovereign, pardon to me. + KING. All is whole; + Not one word more of the consumed time. + Let's take the instant by the forward top; + For we are old, and on our quick'st decrees + Th' inaudible and noiseless foot of Time + Steals ere we can effect them. You remember + The daughter of this lord? + BERTRAM. Admiringly, my liege. At first + I stuck my choice upon her, ere my heart + Durst make too bold herald of my tongue; + Where the impression of mine eye infixing, + Contempt his scornful perspective did lend me, + Which warp'd the line of every other favour, + Scorn'd a fair colour or express'd it stol'n, + Extended or contracted all proportions + To a most hideous object. Thence it came + That she whom all men prais'd, and whom myself, + Since I have lost, have lov'd, was in mine eye + The dust that did offend it. + KING. Well excus'd. + That thou didst love her, strikes some scores away + From the great compt; but love that comes too late, + Like a remorseful pardon slowly carried, + To the great sender turns a sour offence, + Crying 'That's good that's gone.' Our rash faults + Make trivial price of serious things we have, + Not knowing them until we know their grave. + Oft our displeasures, to ourselves unjust, + Destroy our friends, and after weep their dust; + Our own love waking cries to see what's done, + While shameful hate sleeps out the afternoon. + Be this sweet Helen's knell. And now forget her. + Send forth your amorous token for fair Maudlin. + The main consents are had; and here we'll stay + To see our widower's second marriage-day. + COUNTESS. Which better than the first, O dear heaven, bless! + Or, ere they meet, in me, O nature, cesse! + LAFEU. Come on, my son, in whom my house's name + Must be digested; give a favour from you, + To sparkle in the spirits of my daughter, + That she may quickly come. + [BERTRAM gives a ring] + By my old beard, + And ev'ry hair that's on 't, Helen, that's dead, + Was a sweet creature; such a ring as this, + The last that e'er I took her leave at court, + I saw upon her finger. + BERTRAM. Hers it was not. + KING. Now, pray you, let me see it; for mine eye, + While I was speaking, oft was fasten'd to't. + This ring was mine; and when I gave it Helen + I bade her, if her fortunes ever stood + Necessitied to help, that by this token + I would relieve her. Had you that craft to reave her + Of what should stead her most? + BERTRAM. My gracious sovereign, + Howe'er it pleases you to take it so, + The ring was never hers. + COUNTESS. Son, on my life, + I have seen her wear it; and she reckon'd it + At her life's rate. + LAFEU. I am sure I saw her wear it. + BERTRAM. You are deceiv'd, my lord; she never saw it. + In Florence was it from a casement thrown me, + Wrapp'd in a paper, which contain'd the name + Of her that threw it. Noble she was, and thought + I stood engag'd; but when I had subscrib'd + To mine own fortune, and inform'd her fully + I could not answer in that course of honour + As she had made the overture, she ceas'd, + In heavy satisfaction, and would never + Receive the ring again. + KING. Plutus himself, + That knows the tinct and multiplying med'cine, + Hath not in nature's mystery more science + Than I have in this ring. 'Twas mine, 'twas Helen's, + Whoever gave it you. Then, if you know + That you are well acquainted with yourself, + Confess 'twas hers, and by what rough enforcement + You got it from her. She call'd the saints to surety + That she would never put it from her finger + Unless she gave it to yourself in bed- + Where you have never come- or sent it us + Upon her great disaster. + BERTRAM. She never saw it. + KING. Thou speak'st it falsely, as I love mine honour; + And mak'st conjectural fears to come into me + Which I would fain shut out. If it should prove + That thou art so inhuman- 'twill not prove so. + And yet I know not- thou didst hate her deadly, + And she is dead; which nothing, but to close + Her eyes myself, could win me to believe + More than to see this ring. Take him away. + [GUARDS seize BERTRAM] + My fore-past proofs, howe'er the matter fall, + Shall tax my fears of little vanity, + Having vainly fear'd too little. Away with him. + We'll sift this matter further. + BERTRAM. If you shall prove + This ring was ever hers, you shall as easy + Prove that I husbanded her bed in Florence, + Where she yet never was. Exit, guarded + KING. I am wrapp'd in dismal thinkings. + + Enter a GENTLEMAN + + GENTLEMAN. Gracious sovereign, + Whether I have been to blame or no, I know not: + Here's a petition from a Florentine, + Who hath, for four or five removes, come short + To tender it herself. I undertook it, + Vanquish'd thereto by the fair grace and speech + Of the poor suppliant, who by this, I know, + Is here attending; her business looks in her + With an importing visage; and she told me + In a sweet verbal brief it did concern + Your Highness with herself. + KING. [Reads the letter] 'Upon his many protestations to +marry me + when his wife was dead, I blush to say it, he won me. Now is +the + Count Rousillon a widower; his vows are forfeited to me, and +my + honour's paid to him. He stole from Florence, taking no +leave, + and I follow him to his country for justice. Grant it me, O +King! + in you it best lies; otherwise a seducer flourishes, and a +poor + maid is undone. + DIANA CAPILET.' + LAFEU. I will buy me a son-in-law in a fair, and toll for this. + I'll none of him. + KING. The heavens have thought well on thee, Lafeu, + To bring forth this discov'ry. Seek these suitors. + Go speedily, and bring again the Count. + Exeunt ATTENDANTS + I am afeard the life of Helen, lady, + Was foully snatch'd. + COUNTESS. Now, justice on the doers! + + Enter BERTRAM, guarded + + KING. I wonder, sir, sith wives are monsters to you. + And that you fly them as you swear them lordship, + Yet you desire to marry. + Enter WIDOW and DIANA + What woman's that? + DIANA. I am, my lord, a wretched Florentine, + Derived from the ancient Capilet. + My suit, as I do understand, you know, + And therefore know how far I may be pitied. + WIDOW. I am her mother, sir, whose age and honour + Both suffer under this complaint we bring, + And both shall cease, without your remedy. + KING. Come hither, Count; do you know these women? + BERTRAM. My lord, I neither can nor will deny + But that I know them. Do they charge me further? + DIANA. Why do you look so strange upon your wife? + BERTRAM. She's none of mine, my lord. + DIANA. If you shall marry, + You give away this hand, and that is mine; + You give away heaven's vows, and those are mine; + You give away myself, which is known mine; + For I by vow am so embodied yours + That she which marries you must marry me, + Either both or none. + LAFEU. [To BERTRAM] Your reputation comes too short for + my daughter; you are no husband for her. + BERTRAM. My lord, this is a fond and desp'rate creature + Whom sometime I have laugh'd with. Let your Highness + Lay a more noble thought upon mine honour + Than for to think that I would sink it here. + KING. Sir, for my thoughts, you have them ill to friend + Till your deeds gain them. Fairer prove your honour + Than in my thought it lies! + DIANA. Good my lord, + Ask him upon his oath if he does think + He had not my virginity. + KING. What say'st thou to her? + BERTRAM. She's impudent, my lord, + And was a common gamester to the camp. + DIANA. He does me wrong, my lord; if I were so + He might have bought me at a common price. + Do not believe him. O, behold this ring, + Whose high respect and rich validity + Did lack a parallel; yet, for all that, + He gave it to a commoner o' th' camp, + If I be one. + COUNTESS. He blushes, and 'tis it. + Of six preceding ancestors, that gem + Conferr'd by testament to th' sequent issue, + Hath it been ow'd and worn. This is his wife: + That ring's a thousand proofs. + KING. Methought you said + You saw one here in court could witness it. + DIANA. I did, my lord, but loath am to produce + So bad an instrument; his name's Parolles. + LAFEU. I saw the man to-day, if man he be. + KING. Find him, and bring him hither. Exit an ATTENDANT + BERTRAM. What of him? + He's quoted for a most perfidious slave, + With all the spots o' th' world tax'd and debauch'd, + Whose nature sickens but to speak a truth. + Am I or that or this for what he'll utter + That will speak anything? + KING. She hath that ring of yours. + BERTRAM. I think she has. Certain it is I lik'd her, + And boarded her i' th' wanton way of youth. + She knew her distance, and did angle for me, + Madding my eagerness with her restraint, + As all impediments in fancy's course + Are motives of more fancy; and, in fine, + Her infinite cunning with her modern grace + Subdu'd me to her rate. She got the ring; + And I had that which any inferior might + At market-price have bought. + DIANA. I must be patient. + You that have turn'd off a first so noble wife + May justly diet me. I pray you yet- + Since you lack virtue, I will lose a husband- + Send for your ring, I will return it home, + And give me mine again. + BERTRAM. I have it not. + KING. What ring was yours, I pray you? + DIANA. Sir, much like + The same upon your finger. + KING. Know you this ring? This ring was his of late. + DIANA. And this was it I gave him, being abed. + KING. The story, then, goes false you threw it him + Out of a casement. + DIANA. I have spoke the truth. + + Enter PAROLLES + + BERTRAM. My lord, I do confess the ring was hers. + KING. You boggle shrewdly; every feather starts you. + Is this the man you speak of? + DIANA. Ay, my lord. + KING. Tell me, sirrah-but tell me true I charge you, + Not fearing the displeasure of your master, + Which, on your just proceeding, I'll keep off- + By him and by this woman here what know you? + PAROLLES. So please your Majesty, my master hath been an +honourable + gentleman; tricks he hath had in him, which gentlemen have. + KING. Come, come, to th' purpose. Did he love this woman? + PAROLLES. Faith, sir, he did love her; but how? + KING. How, I pray you? + PAROLLES. He did love her, sir, as a gentleman loves a woman. + KING. How is that? + PAROLLES. He lov'd her, sir, and lov'd her not. + KING. As thou art a knave and no knave. + What an equivocal companion is this! + PAROLLES. I am a poor man, and at your Majesty's command. + LAFEU. He's a good drum, my lord, but a naughty orator. + DIANA. Do you know he promis'd me marriage? + PAROLLES. Faith, I know more than I'll speak. + KING. But wilt thou not speak all thou know'st? + PAROLLES. Yes, so please your Majesty. I did go between them, +as I + said; but more than that, he loved her-for indeed he was mad +for + her, and talk'd of Satan, and of Limbo, and of Furies, and I +know + not what. Yet I was in that credit with them at that time +that I + knew of their going to bed; and of other motions, as +promising + her marriage, and things which would derive me ill will to +speak + of; therefore I will not speak what I know. + KING. Thou hast spoken all already, unless thou canst say they +are + married; but thou art too fine in thy evidence; therefore +stand + aside. + This ring, you say, was yours? + DIANA. Ay, my good lord. + KING. Where did you buy it? Or who gave it you? + DIANA. It was not given me, nor I did not buy it. + KING. Who lent it you? + DIANA. It was not lent me neither. + KING. Where did you find it then? + DIANA. I found it not. + KING. If it were yours by none of all these ways, + How could you give it him? + DIANA. I never gave it him. + LAFEU. This woman's an easy glove, my lord; she goes off and on +at + pleasure. + KING. This ring was mine, I gave it his first wife. + DIANA. It might be yours or hers, for aught I know. + KING. Take her away, I do not like her now; + To prison with her. And away with him. + Unless thou tell'st me where thou hadst this ring, + Thou diest within this hour. + DIANA. I'll never tell you. + KING. Take her away. + DIANA. I'll put in bail, my liege. + KING. I think thee now some common customer. + DIANA. By Jove, if ever I knew man, 'twas you. + KING. Wherefore hast thou accus'd him all this while? + DIANA. Because he's guilty, and he is not guilty. + He knows I am no maid, and he'll swear to't: + I'll swear I am a maid, and he knows not. + Great King, I am no strumpet, by my life; + I am either maid, or else this old man's wife. + [Pointing to LAFEU] + KING. She does abuse our ears; to prison with her. + DIANA. Good mother, fetch my bail. Stay, royal sir; + Exit WIDOW + The jeweller that owes the ring is sent for, + And he shall surety me. But for this lord + Who hath abus'd me as he knows himself, + Though yet he never harm'd me, here I quit him. + He knows himself my bed he hath defil'd; + And at that time he got his wife with child. + Dead though she be, she feels her young one kick; + So there's my riddle: one that's dead is quick- + And now behold the meaning. + + Re-enter WIDOW with HELENA + + KING. Is there no exorcist + Beguiles the truer office of mine eyes? + Is't real that I see? + HELENA. No, my good lord; + 'Tis but the shadow of a wife you see, + The name and not the thing. + BERTRAM. Both, both; O, pardon! + HELENA. O, my good lord, when I was like this maid, + I found you wondrous kind. There is your ring, + And, look you, here's your letter. This it says: + 'When from my finger you can get this ring, + And are by me with child,' etc. This is done. + Will you be mine now you are doubly won? + BERTRAM. If she, my liege, can make me know this clearly, + I'll love her dearly, ever, ever dearly. + HELENA. If it appear not plain, and prove untrue, + Deadly divorce step between me and you! + O my dear mother, do I see you living? + LAFEU. Mine eyes smell onions; I shall weep anon. [To PAROLLES] + Good Tom Drum, lend me a handkercher. So, I + thank thee. Wait on me home, I'll make sport with thee; + let thy curtsies alone, they are scurvy ones. + KING. Let us from point to point this story know, + To make the even truth in pleasure flow. + [To DIANA] If thou beest yet a fresh uncropped flower, + Choose thou thy husband, and I'll pay thy dower; + For I can guess that by thy honest aid + Thou kept'st a wife herself, thyself a maid.- + Of that and all the progress, more and less, + Resolvedly more leisure shall express. + All yet seems well; and if it end so meet, + The bitter past, more welcome is the sweet. [Flourish] + +EPILOGUE + EPILOGUE. + + KING. The King's a beggar, now the play is done. + All is well ended if this suit be won, + That you express content; which we will pay + With strife to please you, day exceeding day. + Ours be your patience then, and yours our parts; + Your gentle hands lend us, and take our hearts. + Exeunt omnes + + +THE END + + + +<<THIS ELECTRONIC VERSION OF THE COMPLETE WORKS OF WILLIAM +SHAKESPEARE IS COPYRIGHT 1990-1993 BY WORLD LIBRARY, INC., AND IS +PROVIDED BY PROJECT GUTENBERG ETEXT OF CARNEGIE MELLON UNIVERSITY +WITH PERMISSION. ELECTRONIC AND MACHINE READABLE COPIES MAY BE +DISTRIBUTED SO LONG AS SUCH COPIES (1) ARE FOR YOUR OR OTHERS +PERSONAL USE ONLY, AND (2) ARE NOT DISTRIBUTED OR USED +COMMERCIALLY. 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