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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/17061-h.zip b/17061-h.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..91f26ba --- /dev/null +++ b/17061-h.zip diff --git a/17061-h/17061-h.htm b/17061-h/17061-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..2399693 --- /dev/null +++ b/17061-h/17061-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,5086 @@ +<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.01 Transitional//EN"> +<html> + +<head> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=ISO-8859-1"> + <style type="text/css"> +/*<![CDATA[ XML blockout */ +<!-- + p { margin-top: .75em; + text-align: justify; + margin-bottom: .75em; + } + h1,h2,h3,h4,h5,h6 { + text-align: center; /* all headings centered */ + clear: both; + } + hr { width: 33%; + margin-top: 3em; + margin-bottom: 3em; + margin-left: auto; + margin-right: auto; + clear: both; + } + + body{margin-left: 10%; + margin-right: 10%; + } + + .blockquot{margin-left: 5%; margin-right: 10%;} + // --> + /* XML end ]]>*/ + </style> +<title>The Project Gutenberg etext of Class or '29, by Orrie Lashin and Milo Hastings</title> +</head> + +<body> + + +<pre> + +Project Gutenberg's Class of '29, by Orrie Lashin and Milo Hastings + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: Class of '29 + +Author: Orrie Lashin and Milo Hastings + +Release Date: November 14, 2005 [EBook #17061] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CLASS OF '29 *** + + + + +Produced by Roger Taft, RogerTaft_AT_Cox.Net, grandson +of Milo Hastings, and Jim Tinsley. + + + + + +</pre> + + +<h1>CLASS OF '29</h1> + +<h2>A PLAY IN THREE ACTS</h2> + +<h1>BY ORRIE LASHIN and MILO HASTINGS</h1> + +<p>PRICE 75 CENTS</p> + +<p>DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE</p> + +<hr/> + +<p>DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE INC.</p> + +<p>ESTABLISHED BY MEMBERS OF THE DRAMATISTS' GUILD OF THE +AUTHORS' LEAGUE OF AMERICA FOR THE HANDLING OF THE NON-PROFESSIONAL +ACTING RIGHTS OF MEMBERS' PLAYS AND THE ENCOURAGEMENT +OF THE NON-PROFESSIONAL THEATRE.</p> + +<p>BARRETT H. CLARK, <i>Executive Director</i></p> + +<hr/> + +<pre> + +ADVISORY BOARD + +SIDNEY HOWARD EUGENE O'NEILL MARC CONNELLY +GEORGE S. KAUFMAN PHILIP BARRY RACHEL CROTHERS +JOHN HOWARD LAWSON ELMER RICE MARTIN FLAVIN +HOWARD LINDSAY ROBERT E. SHERWOOD SUSAN GLASPELL +ALBERT MALTZ WALTER PRICHARD EATON JOHN GOLDEN +KENYON NICHOLSON JOHN WEXLEY ARTHUR HOPKINS +CLIFFORD ODETS GEORGE ABBOTT AUSTIN STRONG + MAXWELL ANDERSON + + +</pre> + +<p> +The DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, Inc., leases plays, including Broadway +successes, standard plays of the past, and new plays not yet +professionally produced, for the use of college and university +theatres, Little Theatres and other types of non-professionals in +the United States, Canada, and other English speaking countries. +Please send for lists and other information.</p> + +<p>9 EAST 38TH STREET, NEW YORK</p> + +<p>Professional Plays for the Nonprofessional Theatre</p> + +<hr/> + +<p>THE following important plays are among those now handled +exclusively by the DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, INC. Full details and +descriptions of these plays may be secured upon application.</p> + +<p><i>WINTERSET</i>, by Maxwell Anderson.<br> +<i>YELLOW JACK</i>, by Sidney Howard and Paul de Kruif.<br> +<i>THREE MEN ON A HORSE</i>, by John Cecil Holm and George Abbott.<br> +<i>CLASS OF '29,</i> by Orrie Lashin and Milo Hastings.<br> +<i>ETHAN FROME</i>, by Owen and Donald Davis.<br> +<i>THE PETRIFIED FOREST</i>, by Robert E. Sherwood.<br> +<i>AROUND THE CORNER</i>, by Martin Flavin.<br> +<i>BOY MEETS GIRL</i>, by Bella and Samuel Spewack.<br> +<i>AGED 26</i>, by Anne Crawford Flexner.<br> +<i>A HOUSE IN THE COUNTRY</i>, by Melvin Levy.<br> +<i>SEEN BUT NOT HEARD</i>, by Marie Baumer and Martin Berkeley.<br> +<i>SPRING SONG</i>, by Bella and Samuel Spewack.<br> +<i>DAUGHTERS OF ATREUS</i>, by Robert Turney.<br> +<i>WE THE PEOPLE</i>, by Elmer Rice.<br> +<i>SO PROUDLY WE HAIL</i>, by Joseph M. Viertel.<br> +<i>CAPONSACCHI</i>, by Arthur Goodrich and Rose A. Palmer.<br> +<i>MASSES AND MAN</i>, by Ernst Toller.</p> + +<p> +<i>Send for Full Descriptive List of Plays</i></p> + +<hr/> + +<p>DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, INC.</p> + +<p>9 EAST 38TH STREET, NEW YORK CITY</p> + +<p> </p> + +<p> +<i>New Plays Published by</i></p> + +<p>Dramatists Play Service INC.</p> + +<p>AROUND THE CORNER, comedy In 3 acts, by Martin Flavin. This timely +work, described as an "American play for the American people," has +just been released. It was produced in December, 1936, on Broadway +by Lodewick Vroom. Mr. Flavin's latest produced play is a dramatic +picture of an average middle-class American family at grips with +the recent depression. The author has adopted the viewpoint that +even the dark years have their aspects of comedy, and the play is a +rare mixture of character, humor and serious preachment. The play +requires only one interior setting and calls for a cast of 7 men +and 3 women. (Production fee quoted upon request.) Paper bound +books, including prefaces by the author and Clayton Hamilton, 75 +cents.</p> + +<p>SEEN BUT NOT HEARD, melodrama in 2 acts, by Marie Baumer and Martin +Berkeley. This new play was produced by D. A. Doran with +International Productions, Inc., on Broadway in the fall of 1936, +featuring Frankie Thomas. An entirely new twist is here given to +the murder mystery, in that the authors have placed the burden of +discovery upon three children whose intelligence and innocence are +brought to bear on an adult problem. A most ingenious mystery play +worked out, however, in terms of modern theatrical realism. The +play has one interior setting and calls for 15 characters, of whom +8 are adult men and 2 young boys, and 4 adult women and one young +girl. (Production fee quoted upon request.) Paper bound books, 75 +cents.</p> + +<p><i>Descriptive Play Lists Sent Free Upon Request</i></p> + +<p>DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, INC.</p> + +<p>9 EAST 38TH STREET, NEW YORK CITY</p> + +<p> </p> + +<p> </p> + +<hr/> + +<center> +<img src="images/pic1.jpg" alt="Illustration: A Stage scene: Photograph by Lucas Pritchard Studio"> +</center> + +<p>CLASS OF '29</p> + +<p>A PLAY IN THREE ACTS</p> + +<p>BY ORRIE LASHIN AND MILO HASTINGS</p> + +<p>DRAMATISTS<br /> +PLAY SERVICE<br /> +1937 INC.</p> + +<p>COPYRIGHT, 1936, 1937, BY +ORRIE LASHIN AND MILO HASTINGS</p> + +<p>THE AMATEUR ACTING RIGHTS OF THIS PLAY ARE CONTROLLED EXCLUSIVELY +BY THE DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, INC., 9 EAST 38TH STREET, NEW YORK +CITY, WITHOUT WHOSE PERMISSION IN WRITING NO PERFORMANCE OF IT MAY +BE MADE.</p> + +<p>ALL OTHER RIGHTS IN THIS PLAY, INCLUDING THOSE OF PROFESSIONAL +PRODUCTION, RADIO BROADCASTING AND MOTION PICTURE RIGHTS, ARE +CONTROLLED BY MAXIM LIEBER AT 545 FIFTH AVENUE, NEW YORK, N. Y., TO +WHOM ALL INQUIRIES SHOULD BE ADDRESSED.</p> + +<p> </p> + +<p> </p> + +<hr/> + +<p><i>Following is a copy of the program of the original production, in +New York City, May 15, 1936</i>:</p> + + +<p>The Popular Price Theatre</p> + +<p><b>FEDERAL THEATRE WORKS PROGRESS ADMINISTRATION</b></p> + +<p>PRESENTS</p> + +<p><b>CLASS OF '29</b></p> + +<p>A new play by</p> + +<p><b>ORRIE LASHIN and MILO HASTINGS</b></p> + +<p>staged by</p> + +<p><b>LUCIUS MOORE COOK</b></p> + +<p>Settings designed under the supervision of</p> + +<p><b>TOM ADRIAN CRACRAFT</b></p> + +<p>Entire production under the personal supervision of</p> + +<p><b>EDWARD GOODMAN</b></p> + +<p><b>CAST OF CHARACTERS</b></p> + +<p>(in the order in which they speak)</p> + +<table summary="Cast list"> + +<tr><td>KEN HOLDEN</td> <td>Jan Ullrich</td></tr> + +<tr><td>TIPPY SAYRE</td> <td>Allen Nourse</td></tr> + +<tr><td>TED BROOKS</td> <td>Ben Starkie</td></tr> + +<tr><td>MARTIN PETERSON</td> <td>Robert Bruce</td></tr> + +<tr><td>KATE ALLEN</td> <td>Helen Morrow</td></tr> + +<tr><td>LAURA STEVENS</td> <td>Marjorie Brown</td></tr> + +<tr><td>BISHOP HOLDEN</td> <td>Harry Irvine</td></tr> + +<tr><td>LUCILLE BROWN</td> <td>Olive Stanton</td></tr> + +<tr><td>STANLEY PRESCOTT</td> <td>Edward Forbes</td></tr> + +<tr><td>A CASE WORKER</td> <td>Marjorie Dalton</td></tr> + +<tr><td>MISS DONOVAN</td> <td>Edna Archer Crawford</td></tr> + +<tr><td>POLICEMAN</td> <td>Jon Lormer</td></tr> +</table> + +<p> </p> +<hr/> +<p> </p> +<p>ACT I</p> + +<p>SCENE 1. A basement apartment on a Saturday afternoon about +one o'clock, Fall, 1935.</p> + +<p>SCENE 2. Stanley Prescott's office, later the same day.</p> + +<p>ACT II</p> + +<p>The same as ACT I, SCENE 1. About 6 P. M., Spring, 1936.</p> + +<p>ACT III</p> + +<p>The same. About 10 P. M.</p> + +<p>This play can be produced without using Scene 2, Act I at all, and +has been so produced by both Federal Theatres and nonprofessionals. +This reduces the settings required to one. In case this scene is +not played, then of course the characters Lucille Brown and Stanley +Prescott are also omitted. The omission of this scene requires no +alteration of the lines or action of any other part of the play.</p> + +<p> </p> + +<hr/> +<p> </p> + +<h3>DESCRIPTION OF CHARACTERS</h3> + +<p>KEN HOLDEN. <i>A young man about 28 or 29, a graduate of Harvard. +Trained as an architect. But unemployed since his graduation. He is +in love with "Laura." But is very dispirited at his inability to +obtain employment</i>.</p> + +<p>TIPPY SAYRE. <i>About the same age as Ted. Also a graduate of +Harvard. He also has been unable to find employment. But is a man +of very happy-go-lucky type whom it is hard to dishearten. He is +making a living by washing dogs</i>.</p> + +<p>TED BROOKS. <i>Age 28. Also a Harvard graduate of the same class as +the others and also unemployed since graduation. He comes of +wealthy parents who lost their money in the market crash. And seems +quite unable to find any work for which he is suited. And has no +special training. He is being partly supported by Kate Allen who is +in love with him</i>.</p> + +<p>MARTIN PETERSON. <i>About the same age as the others, also a graduate +of Harvard. He is an artist and is making a little money. He is +also a very enthusiastic Communist.</i></p> + +<p>KATE ALLEN. <i>About the same age as the men. She is a graduate of +Vassar, but although she is working she only earns a small salary, +half of which she gives to Ted, with whom she is in love</i>.</p> + +<p>LAURA STEVENS. <i>A pretty girl of about the same age as the others. +A graduate of Vassar. She is in love with Ken Holden and is working +at a salary of about $25 a week</i>.</p> + +<p>BISHOP HOLDEN. <i>A bishop and typical gentleman of his calling. Ken +Holden is his son</i>.</p> + +<p>LUCILLE BROWN.* <i>A young girl. She is secretary to Stanley +Prescott</i>.</p> + +<p>STANLEY PRESCOTT.* <i>A successful American business +man. Hard, conservative</i>.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. <i>A middle-aged woman, working as a +home relief investigator</i>.</p> + +<p>MRS. DONOVAN. <i>A very flamboyant woman of middle +age, fussy and silly type</i>.</p> + +<p>POLICEMAN. <i>A typical New York policeman</i>.</p> + +<p>* NOTE: These characters are not in the play in case Scene 2, + Act I, is omitted.</p> + +<p> </p> + +<p> </p> + +<hr/> + +<h1>CLASS OF '29</h1> + +<h1>ACT I</h1> + +<p>SCENE I: <i>It is Saturday afternoon, about one o'clock.</i></p> + +<p><i>The room is a large one in an old brown-stone house. The ceiling +is high, the floor ancient. It serves for a sleeping as well as a +living room. Off it at one end is a kitchen, at the other a small +bedroom.</i></p> + +<p><i>There is no woman's touch in the place, but in spite of its +dilapidation there is a mellow and intellectual air--lent, perhaps, +by the books and magazines that lie scattered about; some old +college pennants on the wall; also both architectural drawings and +original cartoons. There is a good architect's drawing board in +use by a window and a rack containing many rolls of drawings and +prints</i>.</p> + +<p>TED <i>is sitting on the couch, reading an old book. He wears a once +excellent but now threadbare suit</i>.</p> + +<p>TIPPY <i>wears shabby old dressing gown, short. He has no trousers +on. He is pressing his pants on an ironing board.</i></p> + +<p><i>Each is silent and preoccupied</i>, KEN <i>makes a finishing touch with +color brush, then turns his board down to a more vertical position +and backs off, surveying his work</i>.</p> + +<p>KEN. Take a squint at that, Tippy.</p> + +<p>[TIPPY <i>carefully turns iron on end and steps over to look at +drawing.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. H'm. Very charming. Very charming. If Comrade Stalin could +see that he would order one for each member of his harem.</p> + +<p>KEN. That's a bum joke. Not even Hearst has accused Stalin of +irregularity in his private life.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Sorry. That comes of my not reading Hearst.</p> + +<p>KEN. What's more, this drawing's not intended for the Soviets. It's +distinctly American.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. But Ken, they like it Americanskee. They approve of the way +we <i>do</i> our living, if not of the way we <i>get</i> it.</p> + +<p>KEN. They like our gadgets. The plans I sent to Moscow were all +American inside. But the exteriors were different.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Slaps him on shoulder and returns to pants pressing.</i>] +Well, keep at it, old man. All things come to those who work while +they wait.</p> + +<p>KEN. Work. I just do this to keep from going nuts.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. O. K. Keep occupied. American recovery may yet prove +speedier than Soviet red tape.</p> + +<p>KEN. I've given up hope of hearing from Moscow. It's been five +months ...</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Make allowances for bureaucracy, Ken. +They're in such a hurry over there they haven't time to do +anything.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Starts to remove drawing.</i>] I don't want Martin to see this. +He'd never forgive me if he knew I'd quit working on stuff for +Russia.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Hi, Ted! Give a look on your fellow artist's work.</p> + +<p>[KEN <i>stands aside</i>, TED <i>rises politely, keeping finger in place +in book and looking at drawing briefly.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Indifferently.</i>] It's very nice.</p> + +<p>[<i>He goes back to couch and his book</i>, KEN <i>removes drawing and +rolls it up</i>. TIPPY <i>finishes pants and cuts off iron</i>, MARTIN'S +<i>voice heard in hall, singing.</i>]</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Belaya armeya chornee barone<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Snova gotovyat nam tsarskee trone</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">[MARTIN <i>enters, marching and singing.</i>]</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">No ot tigee doe bretanskeye Morye</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">[<i>Stamps and accents each syllable.</i>]</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Anneya krasnaya vsekh seelnaye.</span></p> + +<p>TIPPY. Jesus, Martin, why don't you get Billy Rose to write a new +song for the Red Army?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. As soon as Ken learns Krasnaya Armeya I'll teach him the +International.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I can bellyache the Armeya better now than he can.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Damned pity you won't study Russian with us. You have a +natural gift for languages.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. The reason Russian is easy for me is because I never learned +the alphabet.</p> + +<p>KEN. Boy, what an alphabet!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Snapping his fingers.</i>] Da, da, da--ah, be, ve, ge.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Picking up book.</i>] Ya, ya, ya,--vas ist das? Das ist ein +buch.</p> + +<p>KEN. Da, da, da,--chto etto takoye? Etto kneega.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Fine. Let's go. [<i>Holds up pencil.</i>] Chto etto takoe?</p> + +<p>KEN. Etta karandash.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Stands book on table.</i>] Chto?</p> + +<p>KEN. Kneega stoeet na stolom.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Throws book under table.</i>] Gdye kneega?</p> + +<p>KEN. Kneega pod stalom.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Great! Now make a sentence of your own.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Lamely.</i>] Tovarisch Stalin ... [<i>Stalls.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Cutting in smartly.</i>] Krasnaya armeya pod stalom. [TIPPY +<i>hangs pants on chair back, and puts away ironing paraphernalia.</i>]</p> + +<p>[MARTIN <i>goes to book shelf and gets Russian reader and +dictionary.</i>]</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I've only a few minutes. But we can do half a page. We'll +never get it unless we keep at it eternally.</p> + +<p>KEN. For eternity you mean.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. You're doing fine with the reading. It'll help you no end +when you get to Russia.</p> + +<p>KEN. God, what faith you have!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Sure you're going to Russia. They have millions of +buildings to build, and they can't train architects fast enough. +[<i>Finds place in book.</i>]</p> + +<p>[KEN <i>hesitates.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. I'm not kidding myself.--I've been doing this more to help +you.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Listen, Ken. Even if you don't go, you should know Russian +so you can read Soviet architectural journals. The years we wasted +on dead languages!--Russia's alive. They're doing things, new +things, big things! Russian is the language of the next great sweep +in world progress.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Sez you.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. You read the New York Times. Where does the real news come +from?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. That depends on who is shooting which.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Shooting isn't news. War isn't news. War is old--atavistic, +a confession of failure, evidence of retrogression. News deals with +new things: progress, science, art, invention, the conquest of +nature. That's real news. And where is it coming from today?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. All right, all right. When you have learned six thousand +more verbs, each with a hundred irregular forms, then you can read +it in Pravda.</p> + +<p>[TIPPY <i>carries board out to kitchen</i>, MARTIN <i>sits at table,</i> KEN +<i>with him</i>. MARTIN <i>finds place in book and points to a word.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Slowly, pronouncing all syllables in monotone, as</i> TIPPY +<i>enters.</i>] Al-yek-tree-feet-see-row-von-nuim ...</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>In disgust.</i>] Stuck on the first word. [<i>Starts thumbing +dictionary.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Word? It sounded to me like a derogatory sentence.</p> + +<p>[<i>Knock on the door</i>, TIPPY <i>sees envelope that was stuck under it +and picks it up. He is opening envelope when knock is repeated. He +opens door and</i> KATE <i>enters.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. Hello, Tippy.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Hello, Kate.</p> + +<p>KATE. Hi, Ted.</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Closing book.</i>] Hello, Kate.</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Starts toward him but stops at table.</i>] Hello, you bums. +How's the Red Army?</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Rising, glad of chance to get away from book.</i>] Tippy just +put it under the table.</p> + +<p>KATE. Good for Tippy! He's the only real American among you.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. The only real American by conviction. Ted's American by +innocence. He won't know there was a Russian revolution until it +becomes a classic.</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Fondly</i>] That makes him very English. [<i>Takes</i> TED'S +<i>book.</i>] Is it Chaucer? Or just dear old Ben Jonson?</p> + +<p>TED. No such luck. It's a first edition of Hemingway's "The Sun +Also Rises." For a man who wanted it, it's worth ten dollars.</p> + +<p>KATE. How much did you pay for it?</p> + +<p>TED. Fifty cents.</p> + +<p>KATE. <i>Swell</i>!</p> + +<p>TED. As long as ignorant people go into the secondhand book +business ... It's a tedious business, but if you look over enough +stalls, you're bound to pick up something.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I'm sorry to be sordid in this literary atmosphere, but if +you really have a book worth ten bucks, you'd better sell it.</p> + +<p>TED. I will if I can find the right man.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Well--the landlord informs us that he has a more desirable +tenant who wants these quarters. He gives us till tomorrow morning +to raise the rent or he will out us kick.</p> + +<p>[KEN <i>turns away and putters with his drawing instruments</i>, TED +<i>goes into bedroom.</i>]</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Who has been absorbed in dictionary.</i>] Hell, it means +electrification!</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Then would I shock you by telling you that the landlord +means business?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Huh? Oh rent! All right, I have my share. Here, take it +now.</p> + +<p>[<i>Hands</i> TIPPY <i>eight dollars</i>, KATE <i>takes money out of her +purse</i>, TIPPY <i>takes it quietly, nodding understanding.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>With gesture toward bedroom</i>.] If he does sell his book, +take his eight dollars and hold it. He may not find a ten-dollar +book next month.</p> + +<p>[TIPPY <i>goes to put money in pocket and discovers he has no pants +on.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Hell. I have no pants.... Sorry, Kate. [<i>He grabs pants off +chair and goes into bedroom.</i>]</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Why don't you quit it, Kate? You aren't helping Ted. You're +ruining him.</p> + +<p>KATE. I'm only lending him the money. He'll pay it back.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Like hell he will! The man's been a deadbeat for years.</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Desperately.</i>] Martin!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. He borrowed off his prosperous friends till he exhausted +that source.</p> + +<p>KATE. He sold them books.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Sold nothing!--Disguised gifts. He made the mistake of +naming prices. Fooled me for a while. Then I happened to meet a +real second-hand books man.</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Angrily.</i>] What business was it of yours, checking up on +him?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. None whatever, so long as it hurt only him and you.</p> + +<p>KATE. You boys need his rent. As long as you get it, why can't you +treat him like a gentleman? His pride is all he's got left.</p> + +<p>[TED <i>re-enters. Wears different tie, good fall topcoat, not new. +His hat and book in his hand.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. The man I think should have this book happens to be out of +town. But I know someone else who might take it. I'll go and see +him.</p> + +<p>[TIPPY <i>enters, bathrobe gone, pants on.</i>]</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Just a minute, Ted. I've just been told I'm butting in on +something that's none of my business. So, having been accused, I'm +going to justify it.</p> + +<p>[TIPPY <i>tries to gesture him to shut up.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. Yes?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. You've been imposing on Tippy here, who is too damned +charitable to speak in his own behalf.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You're not speaking for me, Martin.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. All right, then, I'm speaking for myself. Here is Tippy, a +sanitary engineer, cashing in on his education by washing dogs. +He's making a little money. But he could make a lot more if he had +a place of his own.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I'll have it. I'll have it. Give me time.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. You'll not have it so long as you let people sponge on you.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. That's my business.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. You paid Ted's share of the rent last month, [KATE <i>looks +surprised.</i>] So this month, if Ted stays here he pays not eight but +sixteen dollars. And you stick eight in the savings bank for that +dog laundry.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Now just wait a minute. I can explain last month's ...</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I'll not wait for you to think up another kind lie. God +knows I don't enjoy hurting Ted. He was born and raised a +capitalist and an aristocrat. Now he is a cast-off wreck of the +system that made him. I hate the system, not the men it makes--and +least of all the weak ones it throws into the scrap heap. [<i>Sees +that all are hurt and offended.</i>] Damn it, I'm sorry. My infernal +sense of justice got the better of me. [<i>He goes out.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>With stolid anguish. To</i> KATE.] I'm guilty. I took my rent +money and bought this topcoat at a second-hand store.</p> + +<p>KATE. You said a friend gave it to you.</p> + +<p>TED. I haven't a friend left who'll even give me cast-off clothing.</p> + +<p>KATE. But why did you have to lie about it?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. That coat's an investment. You can't peddle books on Park +Avenue without a topcoat.--Go along and cash in on your investment. +Sell that book.</p> + +<p>KATE. I hope you can.</p> + +<p>TED. I probably can--by going through another half hour as pleasant +as this one. [<i>He goes, shutting door sharply. There is a brief +silence.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. Well, I might as well tell you I haven't got my share of the +rent, either.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. What's the matter? Check late?</p> + +<p>KEN. No.--I sent it back.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You what?</p> + +<p>KEN. I sent it back.</p> + +<p>KATE. Did your father lose his job?</p> + +<p>KEN. Bishops don't lose their jobs.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. So what are you talking about?</p> + +<p>KEN. I've been living off dad for five years.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Starving off him.</p> + +<p>KEN. Don't blame dad. I set the amount under Hoover. Bishops aren't +economists.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You sent the check back and asked for a new deal?</p> + +<p>KEN. No.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Patiently.</i>] Why <i>did</i> you send the check back?</p> + +<p>KEN. I'm through letting dad pay me for piddling around here.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. But Ken, be reasonable. The landlord must eat.</p> + +<p>KEN. Then give him back this place. He can eat the cockroaches.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. No tickee, no shirtee; no money, no housee. [<i>Pause.</i>] And +there's the little matter of our own nutrition.</p> + +<p>KEN. I don't expect you and Martin to feed me.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I doubt if we could.</p> + +<p>KEN. Martin's right, Tippy. You ought to clear out of here and take +that place you wanted.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Hell, that place has been taken. Bargains like that don't +wait.</p> + +<p>KEN. There are other places. But you won't get one as long as you +stay here and we graft off of you. You've been buying half the grub +for the four of us. You fudge the bills against yourself. You're a +goddam fool.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Must you bring that up?</p> + +<p>KEN. Listen, Tippy. Martin can take care of himself, anywhere. He +loves flop houses and flop people.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. And what about Ted?</p> + +<p>KEN. Ted is Kate's problem.</p> + +<p>KATE. Why do you feel so bitter toward him?</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Savagely.</i>] If you'll recall, we only took him in +temporarily because your mother was coming.</p> + +<p>[<i>Angrily, to</i> TIPPY.] Why the hell do you have to plan for Ted? Or +Martin? Or me? I'm not planning for anyone.--I'm clearing out.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Where are you going?</p> + +<p>KEN. That's my affair. I'm packing tonight and leaving tomorrow. +[<i>He goes into bedroom.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. Lord, what a mess!</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Katie, I'm afraid our children are showing too much spirit.</p> + +<p>KATE. What's Ken planning? Going on Laura? </p> + +<p>TIPPY. Lord, no.</p> + +<p>KATE. I'd hardly think so with all that bluff at independence! +[<i>Pause.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. How much did you girls, as seniors, put down as your +expectation of earning power in five years?</p> + +<p>KATE. We didn't do such sordid things at Vassar. And besides, it's +been six years, not five.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Class of '29. Six years, and six of us. Well, we've stuck +together. In solidarity there is strength.</p> + +<p>KATE. This looks like a bust up.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Look here, Kate, you'll take care of Ted, won't you?</p> + +<p>KATE. Why should I?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Snappily.</i>] As an investment. Business is picking up. +Stocks are going up. Culture is coming back. More dogs are being +washed. Rare books will come next.</p> + +<p>KATE. So what?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Ted was born a gentleman. The rest of us merely went to +Harvard.</p> + +<p>KATE. Believe it or not.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Katie, the coming revolution is poppycock. What's coming is +the same damn thing we used to have. And when it gets back it'll +take its old darlings back into its lap. Ted is one of them. So +hold his hand a little longer.</p> + +<p>[<i>There is a hanging against the door with a foot.</i> TIPPY <i>opens +door, and</i> LAURA <i>enters with a tall sack of groceries, which she +shoves into</i> TIPPY'S <i>arms.</i>]</p> + +<p>LAURA. Hello. Where's the gang?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Some are in and some are out.</p> + +<p>KATE. We speak of Fortune and Dame Fortune walks in.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Bringing her own tea.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Fortune. Tea. Ceres. Cornucopia. [<i>Drops bag on arm, posing +as Goddess with the horn of plenty, and spewing groceries over the +table, fruit rolling to floor.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Entering from bedroom.</i>] What in ...?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Tea.</p> + +<p>KATE. Thank God it wasn't eggs.</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>To</i> KEN.] Hello, darling.</p> + +<p>[TIPPY <i>retrieves groceries.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Severely.</i>] What's the idea, Laura?</p> + +<p>LAURA. What idea, honey?</p> + +<p>KEN. You promised to quit it. There's plenty of grub here.</p> + +<p>LAURA. But darling, I can't eat canned baked beans. My ulcer, you +know.</p> + +<p>KEN. You haven't any ulcer.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Nor any baby. But doctors say nervous girls must be careful, +or they'll have both.</p> + +<p>KEN. Don't be a fool.</p> + +<p>[TIPPY <i>starts with bag to kitchen</i>, KATE <i>following. At door he +warns her back.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. The preparing of this tea must be a strictly masculine +affair, [KATE <i>gestures toward</i> KEN <i>and</i> LAURA.] I'm sorry, but I +want tea. If a woman enters that kitchen, there won't be tea. +There'll be house-cleaning. [<i>He goes in and bolts door behind him. +She tries it and finds it locked. She pretends to be interested in +drawings</i>, KEN <i>has turned away from</i> LAURA <i>and there is a +pause.</i>]</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Casually.</i>] Anything new, dear?</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Savagely.</i>] No. You always ask me that.</p> + +<p>LAURA. It doesn't mean anything. Just a little light conversation +to kill that first awkward moment.</p> + +<p>KEN. It means, have I got a job.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Have you?</p> + +<p>KEN. No.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Well, you will have one. And more than a job. Some day +somebody will accept your plans for fabricated houses. And you'll +be rich and famous.</p> + +<p>KEN. If I kid myself, you needn't.</p> + +<p>LAURA. But all this work, Ken ...</p> + +<p>KEN. Won't come to anything. I do it from habit. I do it to keep +from going crazy.</p> + +<p>LAURA. You do it because you know that fabricated houses are the +coming thing.</p> + +<p>KEN. Hell of a chance I'll get at them.</p> + +<p>LAURA. There are going to be dozens of firms in the field, and +they'll all want yearly models.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Sticking his head in door.</i>] Attention! Sergeant Holden, +go at once to the nearest Commissary and requisition 454 grams of +sucrose.</p> + +<p>[KEN <i>salutes and goes. The girls stare after him.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. Now what in the <i>world!</i></p> + +<p>TIPPY. Sugar, Katie. Sugar.</p> + +<p>KATE. But how much?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. One pound. He understood. A year in Paris, you know.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, I'm so sorry! I forgot sugar.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Sorry? It gives him a chance to buy something.--Your failure +to understand the masculine nature is appalling.</p> + +<p>KATE. I'll bet you had sugar.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Yes, we had no sugar.--Forget it. [<i>Exits.</i>]</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh these men!</p> + +<p>KATE. You said it!</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Turns on her suddenly.</i>] Kate, what's the matter?</p> + +<p>KATE. Matter? Why?</p> + +<p>LAURA. You are grouched. Ken is touchy, he wants to quarrel. Tippy +is too nonsensical, even for Tippy. Is something wrong?</p> + +<p>KATE. Everything's wrong.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Tell me.</p> + +<p>KATE. Martin started it. He bawled Ted out for living off me.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, well--Martin!</p> + +<p>KATE. It seems I gave Ted money for his share of the rent last +month, and he bought a coat with it instead.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh.</p> + +<p>KATE. So Tippy had to pay again.</p> + +<p>LAURA, Tippy didn't tell on him?</p> + +<p>KATE. You know he wouldn't. Martin found out some way and told for +him.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Martin's a beast.</p> + +<p>KATE. Maybe he was right. They all but told me to take Ted back and +keep him with me.</p> + +<p>LAURA. And you will, I suppose? [KATE <i>is silent.</i>] I'm sorry.</p> + +<p>KATE. I don't mind your question.</p> + +<p>LAURA. There's nothing else you can do, really.</p> + +<p>KATE. Yes. There's one thing. There's another man.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Are you serious?</p> + +<p>KATE. <i>He</i> is. Serious, and rich, and--sixty.</p> + +<p>LAURA. That beastly old man!</p> + +<p>KATE. Every time he said "I'm an old man" I'd say, "Oh, no, Mr. +Selden" till I convinced him.</p> + +<p>LAURA. So what, Kate?</p> + +<p>KATE. So he thinks he wants me for myself alone. He isn't the least +bit vicarious.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Kate, do be serious.</p> + +<p>KATE. He wants to reduce his income tax by gifts to eleemosynary +institutions. Don't I look eleemosynary?</p> + +<p>LAURA. No. Nor mercenary, either.</p> + +<p>KATE. Ah, but I am. And I've been buying love long enough to have +learned the trade. So now I'm going to sell some.</p> + +<p>LAURA. And Ted?</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Bitterly.</i>] What about him?</p> + +<p>LAURA. You love him.</p> + +<p>KATE. No, I don't, I used to love him.... But I don't any more. You +can't stay crazy about a man when you give him half your salary +every week. You get to hate him.... Oh, it's worse than hate. It's +contempt.</p> + +<p>LAURA. You've stuck it out so long.</p> + +<p>KATE. Too long.</p> + +<p>LAURA. It'll be different as soon as he strikes something.</p> + +<p>KATE. Strikes what? Gold or oil?</p> + +<p>LAURA. He'll find something. It takes time.</p> + +<p>KATE. Time is the only thing I haven't got to spare. Look, I'm +twenty-seven.</p> + +<p>LAURA. But you don't look it.</p> + +<p>KATE. I do--I have wrinkles.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Don't be silly.</p> + +<p>KATE. Around the eyes.</p> + +<p>LAURA. You're imagining.</p> + +<p>KATE. And yesterday I found a gray hair.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Girls of eighteen sometimes have gray hairs.</p> + +<p>KATE. But I feel old! And if I don't look it now, I will soon. +[<i>Pause.</i>] What am I to do, Laura? Keep on working at eighteen +dollars a week till I'm forty?--I haven't a decent thing to wear. +I haven't had a new coat in three years. [<i>Feverishly.</i>] And I'm +frightened. Calendars frighten me.--I want to have some fun. I want +a man to take me to the Ritz and--pay the check.</p> + +<p>LAURA. I know how you feel. Don't you think that I ... What do you +want me to say, Kate?</p> + +<p>KATE. There is nothing to say.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Look, dear. I don't say you should keep Ted. Drop him and go +it alone a while. If you've been living on nine dollars a week, +eighteen will seem a fortune.</p> + +<p>KATE. And what will become of him?</p> + +<p>LAURA. If you <i>are</i> leaving him you can't worry about that.</p> + +<p>KATE. I do worry about it. That's one of the reasons I'll take the +old man and his money.</p> + +<p>LAURA. You're crazy!</p> + +<p>KATE. Am I?</p> + +<p>LAURA. That's something that--that just isn't done!</p> + +<p>KATE. A lot you know.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Kate ...</p> + +<p>KATE. Oh, stop it! That just isn't done! You don't know anything. +You don't even know how I feel ... week after week giving Ted +money. You've been in love with a man whose fond papa's supported +him so you haven't had to soil your lovely ethics with dirty money.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Darling ...</p> + +<p>KATE. Don't darling me. And don't tell me what's decent and +proper--and what isn't done!</p> + +<p>LAURA. I didn't mean ...</p> + +<p>KATE. You didn't mean anything because you don't know anything. But +maybe you're going to learn.--Maybe now you're going to learn +because this gang is breaking up. Not only because my man is a +dead-bent, but because yours is broke.--So now maybe you'll try +keeping a man and see how it feels!</p> + +<p>LAURA. Kate!</p> + +<p>[KATE <i>slams out, brushing</i> KEN, <i>who enters, violently aside.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. What's the matter with her?</p> + +<p>LAURA. Nothing.</p> + +<p>[KEN <i>hands sugar to</i> TIPPY <i>and returns.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. She didn't act like it was nothing.</p> + +<p>LAURA. She's going to leave Ted.</p> + +<p>KEN. Good! The man's a leech.</p> + +<p>LAURA. But he is so helpless.</p> + +<p>KEN. He won't starve. We have no jobs in America, but we don't +starve.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Ken, are you in trouble?</p> + +<p>KEN. In trouble?</p> + +<p>LAURA. With your father?</p> + +<p>KEN. No. No, indeed--I merely sent dad's check back. It's time, +don't you think? [<i>With elaborate unconcern.</i>] And as for this +arrangement here ... we're getting on each other's nerves. And +Tippy ought to get out on his own.</p> + +<p>LAURA. And you?</p> + +<p>KEN. I, too. On my own.</p> + +<p>LAURA. But how?</p> + +<p>KEN. I don't know. But I'll manage somehow.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, Ken ...</p> + +<p>KEN. Why don't you clear out like Kate? Forget me. I'm no good to +you. I never will be.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Don't talk like that.</p> + +<p>KEN. It's true, Laura. Face it. [<i>She puts her arms around him.</i>]</p> + +<p>LAURA. Ken, let's get married.--We've put it off too long.</p> + +<p>KEN. Married!</p> + +<p>LAURA. Not married then. But let's be together. Let's ...</p> + +<p>KEN. It's too late for that. If that was what we'd wanted it would +have happened three years ago.</p> + +<p>LAURA. I love you more now than I did then.</p> + +<p>KEN. And I'm not saying I love you less.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Then?</p> + +<p>KEN. In the last three years I've seen a man I used to love and +respect degenerate under my eyes, become a lousy parasite, living +off a woman whose whole income isn't enough for her to live on +decently.</p> + +<p>LAURA. How can you compare yourself to Ted?</p> + +<p>KEN. Good God, I don't! Yet Ted was once all right.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Ted expected the world to support him. He had nothing to +give it. You have ability and ambition. You want to give things to +the world.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Flatly.</i>] I want a job.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Of course you do, darling!</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Fiercely.</i>] That's all I want. A job. I lay awake nights, +saying over and over, "I want a job, a job, a job ..."</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, I know!</p> + +<p>KEN. I don't think about you when I lie awake at night. I don't +think how nice it would be to have you there in my arms. All I +think about is a job. If it were a choice between you and a job I'd +take the job.--What's the use of kidding ourselves any longer? +[<i>She is silent. He goes on desperately.</i>] I'm not the same fellow +I was three years ago. People slam doors in my face. Do you +understand? They look at me. They see my clothes, my eyes.... +They're antagonized before they speak to me,--just as people are to +a beggar. They say "no" before I ask for anything. No, no, no. They +say it as if I were asking for charity instead of a job. "Nothing +for you." "Sorry." "Nothing today."--It makes a beggar out of you!</p> + +<p>[TIPPY <i>enters, carrying tea tray</i>.]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Hello! Where's the rest of the tea party? [<i>Neither +answers.</i>] Well, we'll have double portions, that's nice.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Tippy, doesn't your world ever fall out from under you?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Certainly not! [<i>Pause.</i>]</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>With forced gayety.</i>] I say, where's Martin?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Can it be that <i>you</i> are asking for Martin!</p> + +<p>LAURA. Uh-huh. I'm ready for him to turn me into a Communist.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. That <i>is</i> news!--Where did Kate go?</p> + +<p>LAURA. To make a date with her boss. He's sixty and rich--and +serious.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. No kidding?--No, my world doesn't drop out from under me. It +merely turns wrong side out in my hand.--Your tea, Ken. It contains +teaffein, which stimulates the heart but quiets the nerves. +Teaffein in tea is the same as caffein in coffee. But under the +profit system we don't know that yet--because no one has invented a +teaffeinless tea.</p> + +<p>[KEN <i>accepts sandwich and tea and tries to be a sport and make the +party.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. I wouldn't need Martin to turn me into a Communist. All I'd +have to do would be to knock out the partition in the middle of my +brains and let the left side mingle with the right.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. As if your brains weren't muddled enough already!</p> + +<p>[MARTIN <i>bursts in, carrying two Soviet posters. Leaves door +ajar.</i>]</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Hey, fellows, see what I've got! [<i>He hangs one up while +the others are inspecting the first.</i>]</p> + +<p>LAURA. It's ugly.</p> + +<p>KEN. I like them. Why can't Americans make ugly things look +beautiful?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>To</i> MARTIN.] Sow your seed now, Soviet sower. The powers +of darkness have been fertilizing the ground.</p> + +<p>[TIPPY <i>takes thumb tacks and bottle of red ink and goes to +kitchen.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. A Soviet poster compared to an American lithograph is like a +Soviet film compared with the stuff they grind out in Hollywood.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. By God, you're right.--It's the same in all the arts.</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Hysterically jovial.</i>] 'Fess up, Ken. Who's been taking +you to American movies?</p> + +<p>KEN. I still remember some I saw during Hoover's administration. +You don't mean they've changed them?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Only the revolution will change that tripe.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Gently, Martin. I just told Tippy I was all ripe to turn +Communist. But let's enter by the Socialist door. I don't like +revolutzia. It's bloody.</p> + +<p>[MARTIN <i>pours himself tea</i>. KEN <i>squints at posters,</i> LAURA +<i>munches sandwich and giggles</i>.] Comrade Martin--bring on your +material dialectics.</p> + +<p>[<i>Before</i> MARTIN <i>has chance to answer</i>, TIPPY'S <i>voice sings +stridently, as he comes marching in.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Belaya armeya chornee barone<br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Snova gotovyat nam tsarskee trone</span></p> + +<p>[<i>He is now in. A towel is tied about his head with a +big blotch of red ink over his temple. He carries a +broom as a flagstaff to which a red bandanna handkerchief +is attached as a red flag.</i>]</p> + +<p> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">No ot tigee do bretanskeye morye</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Armeya krasnaya vsekh seelnaye.</span></p> + +<p>[<i>On chorus</i>, MARTIN'S <i>better voice cuts in strong. He seizes</i> +LAURA <i>by the arm, forcing her to march with</i> TIPPY. <i>And</i> KEN, +<i>beating time with goose step, also sings.</i>]</p> + +<p>ALL. Tak poost Zheh krasnaya</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Shumayet vlasno</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Svoe shtik mozoleestoy rookoy</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Es vse dolshnee mwee</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Neudersheemo</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Ette v poslednee sharkee boy.</span><br /> +<span style="margin-left: 6em;">[<i>This chorus repeats.</i>]</p> + +<p>[<i>The</i> BISHOP <i>has appeared in the open doorway; they do not see +him and march and sing lustily</i>, BISHOP HOLDEN <i>stands and watches +them in growing consternation. They see him and stop suddenly. Only</i> +MARTIN'S <i>voice finishes the last line.</i>]</p> + +<p>LAURA. Bishop Holden!</p> + +<p>BISHOP. What is this?</p> + +<p>KEN. Hello, Dad.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Just a bit of fun. [<i>He tosses the broom with its flag into +a corner, but has forgotten to take off bandage. He steps up and +offers his hand to the Bishop.</i>] How are you, sir?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Shaking hands.</i>] What is the matter with your head?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Oh Jesus! [<i>Yanks off towel.</i>]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Were you rehearsing for a theatrical?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Full dress. My wound was dressed with red ink.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. And that song you were singing? I couldn't quite place it.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. That's a Red Army song.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Red Army?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Soviet--Russian.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. So you were all engaged in a little burlesque? Sorry to +have disturbed you.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Tippy was making it burlesque. He refuses to take anything +seriously.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. And the--uh--occasion?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. The occasion was that I had just brought home those +posters.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Looking at the posters.</i>] Ah, I see.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. How do you like them?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. The lettering has some Greek characters. I take it that is +Russian?</p> + +<p>KEN. Of course, dad. They're Soviet posters.--A rather distinctive +form of art.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Ah, it is the unique art and the martial music you find +entertaining--or were you burlesquing a Communist meeting?</p> + +<p>KEN. It was just Tippy's idea of fun.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Not quite satisfied.</i>] But you were all singing that song +as if you know it well.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Martin's always singing it--till we've memorized it without +the least idea what it means.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Satisfied.</i>] Ah yes, of course. I once learned a Japanese +song.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I'm studying Russian.</p> + +<p>KEN. It's quite a language, dad. It would be easy for you with your +knowledge of Greek.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Are you studying Russian, too?</p> + +<p>KEN. Martin's been teaching me a little. I wish I had your +linguistic preparation for it.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I learned Greek so I could read the Gospels in the original +tongue.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. That's why they're learning Russian.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. The Gospels in Russian?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Saint Marx, Saint Engels, Saint Lenin and Saint Stalin.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But--if you mean Karl Marx, he wrote in German.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Hitler had him translated into Russian so the Germans +couldn't read him.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You're a very witty young man. Your sense of humor will +save you from any dangerous doctrine.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. His sense of humor saves him from anything serious.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. While I don't approve of a flippant attitude toward life, +it is far better than accepting dangerous and destructive +doctrines--such as Russian Communism.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Dangerous to world capitalism--but constructive of a new +civilization.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Young man, may I ask if you are American born?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I was born on a Dakota farm. My father was an American +kulak. An insurance company expropriated him.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Bishop Holden didn't come to get into arguments with you +boys.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Another time, perhaps. I think I could convince you that +you're following a dangerous delusion.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Thanks, Laura. You're right. I'll run along.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I'll go with you. I've a bit of shopping I ought to do.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I'll get your hat. [<i>Goes to bedroom.</i>]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. And how is your business progressing, Timothy? Kenneth +wrote me about it. Don't be ashamed of it. Don't be ashamed of +honest labor, young man.--You are boarding dogs, I believe.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. No. I have no place for that. I only wash them.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You wash them and they pay you?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Yes sir. That is, I wash the dogs, and the people pay me.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Ah yes. I understand.</p> + +<p>[MARTIN <i>comes out with</i> TIPPY'S <i>hat. Picks up his own.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Clean dogs for clean people.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Lap dogs for kept women.--People are desperate and +destitute.--And Tippy washes dogs for a living!</p> + +<p>BISHOP. It's a sad world. It's true that some have too much, and +many have too little....</p> + +<p>MARTIN. But we mustn't protest. The meek shall inherit the earth!</p> + +<p>BISHOP. And the devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I respect any man for his convictions. But it seems to me, +sir, if you want to save the church when the revolution comes to +America, you had better see to it that the class sympathy of the +church agrees with the class sympathy of the man who founded it.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Hurriedly.</i>] Good-bye, sir. [TIPPY <i>and</i> MARTIN <i>go.</i>]</p> + +<p>[LAURA <i>quickly gathers up the tea things and puts them on a tray +and goes to kitchen. In the following scene she is on and off. The</i> +BISHOP <i>walks about, troubled and silent. He looks at posters, +picks up the Russian books and looks at them.</i>]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Russian. Why are you studying Russian?</p> + +<p>KEN. I find it interesting.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Chinese would be interesting. Why Russian?</p> + +<p>KEN. I am interested in their architectural developments.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. My boy, you haven't it in mind to go to Russia?</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Evasive.</i>] Wanting doesn't get you there.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Why, of all places in the world, should you want to go to +Russia?</p> + +<p>KEN. There is no unemployment there. They need men.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Impatiently.</i>] Oof! Russia ...</p> + +<p>[TED <i>enters. He still has the book.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Greeting</i> BISHOP <i>with aloof diffidence.</i>] How do you do, +sir?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Very cordial.</i>] How are you? How are you?</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Sees</i> KEN <i>looking at his book.</i>] My man wasn't in. I'll go +back and try again later. Is Kate here?</p> + +<p>KEN. No. She stepped out.</p> + +<p>TED. Then, if you'll excuse me I'll go into the other room and lie +down. I've developed a frightful headache.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. That is unfortunate. Have you aspirin?</p> + +<p>TED. Yes, thank you. [<i>He goes into bedroom, closing door.</i>]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Now there is a fine young man who's facing a real problem. +He certainly wasn't trained for commercial pursuits. Yet there he +is--selling. Uh, what is he selling, Kenneth?</p> + +<p>KENNETH. [<i>Sarcastically.</i>] Books.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I knew his father well. A gentleman and a scholar. +Unfortunately, he was a gambler. The depression finished him.</p> + +<p>KEN. It's finishing a lot of us.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. My boy, I would not have you be extravagant, but I still +have enough. I can still support you.</p> + +<p>KEN. I'm sick of living on charity.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Charity?</p> + +<p>KEN. On your charity.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You are my son. What little I give you is yours by right.</p> + +<p>KEN. What right? I'm not a child, nor a cripple. I'm nearly thirty +years old.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. These are not normal times.</p> + +<p>KEN. They are normal for me.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Be patient a little longer. Our system is not perfect, but +it's the best the world has known. It has been responsible for all +our progress.</p> + +<p>KEN. We're not even aiming at progress, only at recovery; only +trying to gain back something we had in the past.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But how can you think there is progress in Russia? It's a +slave state; a tyranny. Freedom is essential to progress.</p> + +<p>KEN. I don't want freedom. I want a chance to work. I want my +share.... Other people have their share, and they have dogs. I +don't want dogs, but I want a right to have them.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Your soul is poisoned with envy.</p> + +<p>KEN. It's a short life, dad, and mine is half gone already. There +is beauty; I want to enjoy it. There are good things; I want some +of them. Disease and death we can't help, but poverty we <i>can</i> +help.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. This is Martin's influence. [<i>Excited.</i>] Ken, you must not +turn Communist. Do you hear? I forbid it.</p> + +<p>KEN. The Inquisition tried forbidding convictions.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Frightened.</i>] Convictions?</p> + +<p>KEN. I'm fed up. [<i>More savage and bitter as he goes on.</i>] One can +go on so long. Things look hopeless but you still hope. Important +people make cheerful speeches. You believe them. You <i>want</i> to +believe them. You think tomorrow something's going to happen. +Something's got to happen! Tomorrow comes and goes--a lot of +tomorrows. Nothing happens, nothing. And nothing's going to happen.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. My son, you are wrong. The situation is improving. Business +conditions are already vastly better. It takes time. You'll get a +job, very soon.</p> + +<p>KEN. I've heard that for six years. </p> + +<p>[<i>Pause.</i>]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Clearing his throat; takes check from pocket.</i>] Now this +check you returned ...</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Shortly.</i>] I don't want it.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But how can you get along without it?</p> + +<p>KEN. I'll get along.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. How do you propose to live?</p> + +<p>KEN. By sleeping on park benches, eating in our bread lines.--Or +I'll tell the government I'm destitute--or get a relief job.--I +won't go on the way I've been doing.--Laura comes and brings food; +Tippy leaves cigarettes around; you send me checks. I'm sick of +having to take from you all!--If I've got to live by charity, I +want to be free to hate charity. That's a beggar's right.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. It gives us pleasure to help you.</p> + +<p>KEN. But can't you see what you're doing to my self-respect?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I don't want to hurt your self-respect.</p> + +<p>KEN. Then leave me alone.</p> + +<p>[<i>Pause.</i>]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Clearing his throat.</i>] Have you been to see Stanley +Prescott?</p> + +<p>KEN. Yes.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Why hasn't he done something for you?</p> + +<p>KEN. I suppose he can't.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Prescott's my friend. He ought to do something for you.</p> + +<p>KEN. Oh, the hell with Prescott! [<i>Contrite.</i>] Don't misunderstand +me. I wouldn't refuse any job he had to offer me. I'd black his +boots if that was the job. But I've been to see him as much as I +can. I can't sit on his doorstep and whine.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Certainly not. You must not do anything that would hurt +your self-respect. [<i>He has been holding the check, which he now +lays down on the table.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. Don't leave that check, dad.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But son--</p> + +<p>KEN. If you do, I'll tear it up.</p> + +<p>[BISHOP <i>picks up check, talks to</i> LAURA.]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I'll leave this check with you, Laura. Give it to him when +he--when he is himself again. [<i>At this</i> KEN <i>picks up his hat and +walks out without a word. The two look unhappily after him</i>. +BISHOP, <i>shaken.</i>] That boy--that sane youth ... What's happened +to him?</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>With difficulty.</i>] He wants to break our engagement.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Ah! That's the trouble then. You two have quarrelled.</p> + +<p>LAURA. He doesn't need me. I don't mean anything to him....</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But of course you do.--There, Laura, there!</p> + +<p>LAURA. No. He doesn't. I feel it.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Why, for years you've meant everything to him. He planned +to marry you as soon as he graduated. ...</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, he's so muddled--he's so muddled!</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I know how you feel, my dear, but lovers' quarrels ...</p> + +<p>LAURA. It's not a lovers' quarrel. Oh, don't you understand? His +morale's all shot.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Kenneth is essentially sound. Now don't worry, my dear. +[<i>Indulgently.</i>] I'll wait and have another talk with him, eh? +Perhaps that's what he needs; a good, sound, heart-to-heart talk +with his father.</p> + +<p>LAURA. He needs a job! He needs a job! It's more important than I +am--more important than you--more important than anything in the +world.</p> + +<p>[TED <i>opens the door; starts to come out; hears the tense +conversation and stands, hesitant.</i>]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You are right. Work is essential,--more essential than +love. That's what all these young people need. Something to do with +their hands, with their heads. To feel that the world needs +them--that they have a right to live.</p> + +<p>LAURA. That they belong!</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Yes, yes ...</p> + +<p>LAURA. You've got to find him a job. You've got to!</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Dear child--if only I could!</p> + +<p>LAURA. You've got to!--even if you have to buy one.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Buy one?</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Moving closer to him.</i>] He need never know....</p> + +<p>[TED <i>draws back and softly closes the door.</i>]</p> + +<h2>SLOW CURTAIN</h2> + +<hr/> +<p> </p> + +<h1>ACT I</h1> + +<p>SCENE 2*: PRESCOTT'S <i>office has an air of magnificence. Seems high +above the street. In an anteroom can be seen the</i> BISHOP, +<i>waiting</i>, LUCILLE, PRESCOTT'S <i>secretary, a smartly-dressed young +woman, is in the office, reading a newspaper. After a moment</i>, +BISHOP HOLDEN <i>comes to the door</i>.]</p> + +<p>* This scene can be omitted.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I beg your pardon, [LUCILLE <i>looks up.</i>] Are you sure Mr. +Prescott will be back?</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. Yes sir.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You think I ought to wait?</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. Saturday's a bad day. Why don't you come back on Monday?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I must see him today. If I can't see him here I shall try +to see him at his home.</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. [<i>Quickly.</i>] Then you had better wait.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Very well. [<i>He goes out, sits down</i>, LUCILLE <i>begins to +type; the telephone rings. Before answering, she closes door, +shutting out the</i> BISHOP.]</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. Hello? Yes, Mrs. Prescott. Not yet, but he took the +eleven-thirty train out of Washington and should be here any +moment. [<i>Listens.</i>] At the Colony? I'll tell him the minute he +comes in. [<i>Hangs up.</i>]</p> + +<p>[<i>In a moment the door opens</i>, PRESCOTT <i>stands in the doorway, +with his back turned, speaking to the</i> BISHOP.]</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. I'll be with you in a minute, James. [<i>Enters and shuts +the door.</i>]</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. Oh, Mr. Prescott! You had a good trip, I hope?</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. No. It wasn't very good.</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. Oh, I'm sorry! And it spoiled your weekend, too.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Spoiled everything. Well, it can't be helped. Anything +need my attention here?</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. It's been very quiet. Your wife telephoned. She said she'd +be at the Colony Club, and would you 'phone her there.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. All right. Is that all?</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. That's about all.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. How long has Bishop Holden been waiting?</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. About an hour.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. What does he want?</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. He didn't say.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Why didn't you tell him I couldn't see him today?</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. He said he'd go to your house if he couldn't see you here, +so I ...</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Can't I get any protection around here? You could have +said I was out of town for the weekend.</p> + +<p>LUCILLE. I didn't think of that.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. You never think of anything.--Send him in.</p> + +<p>[LUCILLE <i>goes out</i>; BISHOP <i>enters.</i>] </p> + +<p>BISHOP. Seeing you brings back old times.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. I'm glad to see you, James. Although [<i>Looks at watch.</i>] +If you'd let me know I might have kept myself free....</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I won't keep you long.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Sit down.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Stanley, I'm in trouble. I've come to you for help.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. [<i>Wary.</i>] I needn't tell you that anything in my power ...</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You're a business man.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. When there is business.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You believe in our American system of government.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Certainly, certainly. The system we did have.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. So do I. Sincerely. I have the deepest, profoundest faith +in our democracy.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. [<i>Impatient with the other's irrelevancy.</i>] The world +has not yet found anything better.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But unless we do something it won't last beyond our +generation.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Nonsense.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Social unrest is growing. Young people, in their enforced +idleness, are turning away from all that we have taught them.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. [<i>Annoyed.</i>] Come, James. That isn't what you came to see +me about.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. It is.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. You have been reading sensational papers. Of course a +depression gives the radicals a chance to spread their doctrines. +But there isn't any cause for worry. Prosperity is always a sure +cure for radicalism. And things are picking up.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You are probably under the common delusion that all +radicals are wild-eyed foreigners.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. [<i>Bitter in his thoughts</i>.] If it wasn't for this foolery +at Washington ...</p> + +<p>BISHOP. So was I. But I find they are not.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. We should all have been out of the slump long ago.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Many of them--the young ones--are good American stock.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. The Administration proclaims its adherence to the profit +system....</p> + +<p>BISHOP. They have education, in some cases, background, but +unfortunately no experience.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT.... and at the same time it insists on unfair competition +with private enterprise.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. As long as such men remain idle ...</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. So how can private capital be expected to make +commitments?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I don't know.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. But don't you agree?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Perfectly.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Surely, James, the depression did not hit you personally?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. In unexpected ways, Stanley--in most unexpected ways.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. On the contrary, the Church should have benefited. People +in misfortune turn to religion.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But with empty pockets. However, I am not complaining for +the Church. It is my son I am worried about.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Ah, yes. Kenneth. An agreeable fellow, Kenneth.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Of the six years he's been out of college he has worked +only four months. Think of it.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Is he married?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. No.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. That's fortunate.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Perhaps. If he were married and had a dependent wife and +children he might get architectural work in a government slum +clearance project.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Exactly what I was talking about. The sooner the +government turns the building industry back to private enterprise +the better.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Kenneth's situation is tragic. He is a mature man, long +overdue to take a man's full place in the world.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. [<i>Impatient.</i>] Yes, I know--I know.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Yet he is classed as a dependent child.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Well, aren't you able to take care of him?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I have kept him from starving.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. You realize, of course, that he is better off than many.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Keeping him alive is not the point. It is not enough. His +spirit is crushed, his education unused, his manhood wasted. He is +ambitious, wants to work, to establish a home of his own. He is +strong, and he is capable.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Yes, yes, I understand. I deplore the waste. It is +shameful. But in any event, these conditions won't last much +longer.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. They have lasted a long time.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Yes, longer than they should.--I wish I could help you, +James, but I cannot.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I want you to give Kenneth a job, Stanley.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. If I could, I assure you.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Any job. Anything that will make him feel useful and keep +him occupied.--Surely in an organization like yours ...</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. At the moment we are doing no building whatever. One or +two small projects; and a mere skeleton staff to keep my +organization.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I saw in the papers ...</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. That I am interested in the mass production of fabricated +houses. Yes!--And men associated with me are ready to launch +large-scale production as soon as we are assured of freedom from +competition with cheap government money and cheap government labor.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Then, surely ...</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. I have just returned empty-handed from a bunch of +half-baked theorists who are heading us into socialism and calling +it democracy!</p> + +<p>BISHOP. With a view to your project going through, could you not +take Kenneth on?</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Impossible. My small staff has already done all the +preparation that needs to be done. My hands are tied till these +socialists in Washington are out.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But has not business been given a breathing spell?</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. I don't sell hot dogs. I build houses. People don't +consume houses during a breathing spell.--I tell you I could put a +capital of twenty millions at work tomorrow if we were guaranteed +that in ten years, or even twenty years, we could get our money +back.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But what do you fear? You just said you did not fear a +revolution.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. I don't. I fear the continuance of what we already have. +Stagnation and semi-socialism.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. When could you give my boy a job?</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. When a sound administration goes into power at +Washington.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I don't dare to make him wait.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Then you must continue to take care of him.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. It is not the cost of his living. He needs work. I can't +provide that. You could, if you would.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Believe me, I would if I could.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You understand that the salary ...</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. James, I know that your son is a capable young man and I +would like to have him here with me. But I can't make a job for a +man when I have nothing for him to do.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You, must, Stanley. I can afford to support him, but he +refuses to accept support from me any longer.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Well?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. If you will give him a job, I will recompense you for his +salary.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. [<i>Shocked.</i>] You can't mean that.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I do mean it.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. I am surprised, James--that a man of your principles and +profession ...</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I am in a very grievous dilemma.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. I am sorry, but I can't do it. It is neither ethical nor +wise.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I don't know whether it is wise or not. But I know my son +is desperate. I know I have got to do something. I can't see that +fine boy going about lost and unwanted, with no place in the world. +I can't see my son turning to Communism--and helping to pull down +not only your temples of money, but my House of God.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. I am very sorry. I can't do what you ask.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. If your plans go through, you would have a place for him?</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. [<i>Impatiently.</i>] Yes, yes.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Then until they do--for my sake, Stanley. For old times' +sake. Because we were classmates.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. But it's damned unethical! Do you realize ... +[<i>Telephone rings.</i>] Hello!--Oh, hello, dear ... Yes, I am just +leaving. I'll be there in a few minutes. [BISHOP <i>takes out +checkbook and writes.</i>] I don't like this.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. The ethical sin will be wholly mine. You don't know what +it'll mean to my boy to be associated with your firm; you don't +know what it'll mean to the girl. He's been engaged to her for +three years.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. I don't like it.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. It means new life for two young people, life for them in +our way of life. This check, Stanley, is for twelve hundred +dollars. Pay Kenneth twenty-five dollars a week. When your plans go +through, pay him whatever he's worth to you.</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. It's damned unethical.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. There is a greater righteousness than business ethics. +[<i>Protesting still</i>, PRESCOTT <i>takes the check.</i>] Good-bye, +Stanley--God bless you. [BISHOP <i>goes.</i>]</p> + +<p>[PRESCOTT <i>stands regarding check a moment, then rings,</i> LUCILLE +<i>enters</i>.]</p> + +<p>PRESCOTT. Take a letter. Mr. Kenneth Holden. You have his address +on file. Dear Kenneth: Sometime ago you came in to inquire if I +could find a place for you. I am glad to tell you that there is a +vacancy here now, and if you are still looking for something the +place is yours. The work will be ... [<i>Pause.</i>] to develop the +interesting plans you spoke to me about, pending possible use of +them in the future.... [<i>Pause.</i>] The salary will be small to start +with, twenty-five dollars a week. Paragraph. You can begin work at +any time....</p> + +<h2>CURTAIN</h2> + +<hr/> + +<p> </p> + +<h1>ACT II</h1> + +<p><i>A few months later. The hour is dusk. A basement apartment lower +than street level. There are four doors, one leading in from the +street, one leading to a back yard, one to a kitchen, another to a +bedroom. The room is large and serves as a combined living room and +place of business for a dog specialist. Some of the furniture of +the old place is here. There is a shelf displaying packages of dog +biscuit, muzzles, etc. The walls are decorated with pictures of +dogs and glaring advertisements of dog goods, especially +insecticides. There is a large homemade sign</i>:</p> + +<p><i><b>I CLIP, TRIM, PLUCK, WASH AND EXTERMINATE.</b></i></p> + +<p><i>At one side is Martin's sketching table, and on wall near it some +of his drawings.</i></p> + +<p>TIPPY <i>is kneeling on the floor beside a wash-tub, bathing a +terrier. He talks to it gently, soothingly, all through following +scene.</i></p> + +<p>MARTIN, <i>with a green eyeshade, is working on a sketch under a +table lamp.</i></p> + +<p><i>During scene</i> TIPPY <i>takes dog out of tub and begins drying him +with a Turkish towel. Has large stack of clean folded towels +and uses one after the other</i>.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>As he sketches.</i>] Your persistent love of Class of '29 +reunions seems to me more admirable than politic.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. It will go off all right if you refrain from talking +politics.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. As if I were the only member of the Unholy Six with a +capacity to make faux pas!</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You have tact and tolerance--when you choose to use them.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Thanks.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. The fact that you and Ted still manage to live under the +same roof proves that.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. That poor devil would win the compassion of Hitler +himself--with three Jewish grandmothers!</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Well? If you can put up with Ted, who never did a lick of +work in his life, why quarrel with Ken who is now a true worker, +being duly exploited by a wicked capitalist?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Who said I'd quarrel with him?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You will.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. All right. You referee.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. If he high-hats you with his success I'll tell him that +you've sold a drawing to the <i>New Yorker</i> and you can high-hat him +back.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Lay off that <i>New Yorker</i> stuff.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Sensitive?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Don't be an ass. It's unimportant, that's all.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Eighty dollars--unimportant?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Lays aside drawing, removes eyeshade and rises.</i>] You've +got me wrong if you think I've any qualms about a reunion with our +blissfully-wed bourgeois comrades. Where I doubt your horse sense +is in inviting Kate. </p> + +<p>TIPPY. You can't ask a bride to attend a stag party with four men!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I could have dug up some other female as a shock-absorber.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Listen, son: a man can be a revolutionist and still mix +socially with the White Guard. But a female revolutionist must +either assassinate them or seduce them.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Good-naturedly.</i>] Go to hell.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I invited Kate because she is Laura's friend.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. She was Laura's friend.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Rats!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. In view of recent changes in social status, are you sure +that Kate is still on the calling list of Mr. and Mrs. Kenneth +Holden?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You're talking awful rot.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Maybe you know Ken better than I do.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Hell, he isn't a prig.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Another thing: What makes you so sure Ted will enjoy being +put on social display in his frayed clothes alongside a lady +gorgeously arrayed in the price of her shame?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. The very fact that Ted is so shabby will make it less +obvious that Kate is still--[<i>Pause.</i>]--helping him.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Kate is really showing remarkable restraint. I'd have +expected her to squeeze enough out of a mink coat to dress Ted up a +bit.</p> + +<p>[<i>All this time</i> TIPPY <i>has been wiping dog with one towel after +another. He now gets up and leads dog to yard.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Now I must hang Itzy out to dry.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. God, haven't you dried that cur enough?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Him must be ventilated so him will smell sweet. Him's mama +rubs her nose in him and her is very particular. [<i>He goes out with +dog</i>. MARTIN <i>begins picking up the strewn array of used towels</i>, +TIPPY <i>comes back.</i>] Thanks, old man. [<i>Takes the towels.</i>] Want to +dump the tub for me? [MARTIN <i>carries tub into kitchen,</i> TIPPY +<i>continues cleaning up</i>. TED <i>enters with</i> KATE. <i>She is richly +dressed and has the mink coat</i>, TED <i>has on a complete new outfit: +suit, hat shoes, topcoat. Everything. The coat is gray; suit +brown; hat gray. And there is a price tag on tail of overcoat.</i> +TIPPY <i>stares in astonishment.</i>] Do my eyes deceive me?</p> + +<p>KATE. Hello, flea-killer.--How do you like it?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I must have slept a few years.</p> + +<p>[TED <i>removes coat and lays it on table with hat.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. Slept?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. It looks to me like the Republican Party is back in power.</p> + +<p>[MARTIN <i>re-enters. He stops in astonishment.</i>]</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Hello.</p> + +<p>KATE. Hello, Communist. [<i>Indicates</i> TED.] Does seeing Ted decently +dressed make you see red?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Surveying</i> TED'S <i>clothes.</i>] No, indeed. The true +<i>Communist</i> loves beauty and prosperity. His distinction is that he +insists on both for everybody.</p> + +<p>KATE. Well, I know you are prospering. I saw your drawing in the +<i>New Yorker</i>.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I let them have it at half price just to get it where you +would see it.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Confidentially to</i> KATE.] Half price in the <i>New Yorker</i> +would be triple price in the <i>New Masses.</i> But selling to the <i>New +Yorker</i> is the latest orders from the Comintern. It's the new plan +for boring from within.</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Impressed.</i>] Oh! Is it?</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>To</i> MARTIN, <i>who is still surveying him.</i>] Does it fit all +right?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Perfectly.</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Indicating</i> TED.] Honest, Tippy, what do you think of it?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. What should I think? What would anybody think?</p> + +<p>KATE. He looks nice, doesn't he?</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Trying to seem nonchalant, although he is obviously trying +to justify himself.</i>] I dropped by to remind Kate about the party.</p> + +<p>KATE. And I inveigled him into a shop. Isn't it worth it? +Transforms him. Ted wears clothes so well.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Agreed. The man makes the clothes. Martin in that outfit +would look like an Oklahoma Indian who'd just struck oil.</p> + +<p>KATE. Ted hasn't any business to look shabby. It's all right for +Martin, but Ted just looks pathetic.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. The only reason I don't wear good clothes is because I +spill soup on them.</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Puts hat on</i> TED'S <i>head.</i>] Now, tell me, do you really +like the hat?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. It's O.K.--Is he to wear it in the house?</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Removes hat</i>.] I feel the hat is not quite right.</p> + +<p>KATE. He wanted a brown hat. But <i>I</i> thought gray was smarter.</p> + +<p>TED. Brown would have suited me better.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I'm not up much on sartorial etiquette. Is the hat supposed +to match the coat or the suit?</p> + +<p>TED. There is no arbitrary rule about it. Brown is a better color +for me.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Looks at watch.</i>] If we're going to have any party, I'd +better clear up my work. I have a delivery to make now. [<i>Goes to +yard.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. If you want to change the hat, darling, go ahead. The store's +open until seven.</p> + +<p>TED. Are you sure you wouldn't mind?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Re-enters from yard, carrying small dog in his arms.</i>] +Didn't realize it was getting so late. I'll be back as soon as I +can. [<i>He goes.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. I think, Ted, that gray gives your face more life, [TED <i>puts +hat on again, and surveys himself before the mirror</i>, KATE <i>views +him in critical admiration, readjusts his hat several times, and +stands off to contemplate her man</i>. MARTIN <i>watches them both, then +inspired, takes pencil and cardboard and begins to sketch.</i>] Brown +is unutterably drab. It does the most terrible things to me. Put it +a little more forward. There--<i>I</i> think that's stunning, Ted.</p> + +<p>TED. This time of year the hat and coat would be seen together more +than the hat and suit.</p> + +<p>KATE. That's right.--Put the coat on again, [TED <i>puts coat on +again, and poses with both hat and coat before the mirror.</i>] I +don't know. Perhaps you're right.--If you really want to change the +hat, go ahead.</p> + +<p>[<i>They continue posing</i>, KATE <i>angling the hat, etc., till</i> MARTIN +<i>calls</i> TED. <i>There has been a low knock.</i> MARTIN <i>turns his +sketch face down and opens the door. A middle-aged woman enters.</i>]</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Does Theodore Brooks live here?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Yes.</p> + +<p>[<i>She walks in.</i>]</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Are you Mr. Brooks?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. No.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Well, is he in?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Yes.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Please call him.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Hi, Ted! [TED <i>turns and</i> CASE WORKER <i>looks at him. He +shows no recognition and does not start over.</i>] This lady is +calling on you.</p> + +<p>[TED <i>comes slowly, taking off his hat; he is still wearing the +coat.</i>]</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. [<i>Impatiently.</i>] I asked to see Theodore Brooks.</p> + +<p>TED. Yes?</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. You are not Brooks.</p> + +<p>TED. Yes. That's my name.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Theodore Brooks?--You!</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Uncomfortably.</i>] What do you want, madam?</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. I am a case worker on relief applications.</p> + +<p>TED. Oh!</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Someone giving the name of Theodore Brooks and this +address applied for relief.</p> + +<p>TED. Yes.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Did <i>you</i> make that application?</p> + +<p>TED. Yes.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Why?</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Squirming.</i>] The usual reason--I suppose.</p> + +<p>[<i>There is a pause in which one expects almost anything to +happen.</i>]</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. [<i>With restraint.</i>] Very well. I must ask you a few +questions. [<i>Her antagonism is felt all through.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. I'll try to answer them. [<i>Desperately.</i>] I needed relief or I +wouldn't have applied for it.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. You feel you still need relief?</p> + +<p>TED. I do.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Well ... Well, we'll go ahead. I have to fill my +records. Your name is Theodore Brooks.</p> + +<p>[<i>She sits at table to fill out blanks</i>, TED <i>stands.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. That's right.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Age?</p> + +<p>TED. Twenty-eight.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Where born?</p> + +<p>TED. New York City.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. When?</p> + +<p>TED. Twenty-eight years ago.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. No, no, the date!</p> + +<p>TED. March 20, 1907.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Father's name?</p> + +<p>TED. Nathaniel Brooks.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. His birthplace?</p> + +<p>TED. New York City.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. His ancestry?</p> + +<p>TED. The Pilgrim fathers.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Your mother's name?</p> + +<p>TED. Susan Cartwright, born in Philadelphia. Her ancestors, +American Quakers.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. [<i>Writing fast.</i>] Wait a minute.--Both parents living?</p> + +<p>TED. Both dead.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Brothers and sisters?</p> + +<p>TED. None.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. What other close kin?</p> + +<p>TED. I have one uncle and two aunts.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Do they live in New York City?</p> + +<p>TED. It happens that none of them does.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Then we don't need them.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Pardon me, but how far in kinship does the responsibility +go?</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. It depends. We can't force uncles and aunts to +contribute, but we sometimes give them the opportunity to do so. +However, this doesn't look like a kin folks case. And now, young +man, just what is your occupation?</p> + +<p>TED. I haven't any. That's my trouble.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. No occupation? You're not a minor. For adults +occupation must be stated.</p> + +<p>TED. Very well, I am a collector.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. By what firms have you been employed?</p> + +<p>TED. None.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Then how can you be a collector?</p> + +<p>TED. You said I must have an occupation.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. You are not helping me by lying and you may get +yourself into trouble.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Is it the first time you ever ran into a man, who needed +relief, not because he had worked, but because he hadn't?</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. [<i>Snappily.</i>] I didn't prepare those blanks, but I +have to fill them out. One can have an occupation, like +stenography, when trained for it, even though they have never been +employed.</p> + +<p>TED. All right, put that down and go ahead.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Stenography?</p> + +<p>TED. No, collecting.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. But collectors aren't trained. One has to have worked +at that.</p> + +<p>TED. Then say I worked as a collector for my father.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. What business was he in?</p> + +<p>TED. He was retired.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Then what did you collect for him?</p> + +<p>TED. First editions.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Please talk sense.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Books. A book collector.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. You mean, a bookkeeper?</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Bitterly.</i>] We kept them as long as we could. My father died +during the Wall Street panic. He'd gone bankrupt. Since you want to +know how I lived, I lived for some time by selling my father's +books.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. [<i>Writing.</i>] Then you lived without working, on +property that you inherited?</p> + +<p>TED. Yes, till that source was exhausted.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. When was that?</p> + +<p>TED. Some time ago.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. You must be definite.</p> + +<p>TED. Then say two years ago.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. You sold <i>all</i> your father's books?</p> + +<p>TED. I still have the family Bible, a set of Shakespeare with the +marginal notations made by father while he was at Oxford, and a few +others.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. How much do you consider those books worth?</p> + +<p>TED. I consider them invaluable.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. But you must set a value upon them.</p> + +<p>TED. Why?</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Because if you own anything worth two hundred dollars +you are not eligible for relief.</p> + +<p>TED. I have nothing worth that to anybody but me.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. You say you quit selling these books about two years +ago.</p> + +<p>TED. Yes.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. How have you lived since then?</p> + +<p>TED. Chiefly on borrowed money.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. From whom did you borrow the money?</p> + +<p>TED. From friends.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. You have very prosperous friends?</p> + +<p>TED. I had some prosperous friends.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. You are extremely well-dressed for an applicant for +relief.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Let me explain that. We were to have a little dinner party +tonight ...</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. And he bought a new outfit for this dinner.--Hasn't +even had time to remove the price tags.--Do you mind removing your +coat?</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Takes it off</i>.] I was about to take it off. I'd just come +in.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. [<i>She rises and looks at maker's label in coat.</i>] H'm. +Madison Avenue. [<i>Noses his suit at close range.</i>] And the suit is +better than the coat.--This is the best I've run into yet. +Expensive suit and coat; new shoes; matched accessories. Not much +left of a hundred dollar bill, was there?--But I suppose your rich +uncle died <i>since</i> you applied for relief?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Look here, couldn't a man ...</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Certainly he could, and many do, apply for relief just +to get a little side graft from the government.</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Desperately, humiliated.</i>] I applied for relief because I +wanted a job; because the only way to get a job is to go on relief +first. I haven't anything. I have no source of income.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. [<i>Sarcastic.</i>] No income, but plenty of money? I +understand!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I was about to explain ...</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. [<i>Shortly.</i>] You needn't. You can't bamboozle me. It's +most unfortunate, isn't it, that I caught him unawares? Had he +known I was coming he'd undoubtedly have dressed more correctly for +the role of a relief applicant.</p> + +<p>KATE. Oh, how dare you?</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Our instructions are to report in detail on every +application, and particularly on those that appear fraudulent. +[<i>Fully formidable.</i>] Now, Mr. Brooks. Will you answer truthfully? +Have you any means of support that you have not acknowledged?</p> + +<p>TED. No. I have not.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. [<i>Rising, leaves report lying on table.</i>] Then perhaps +you will explain how you got those clothes?</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Who has had great difficulty keeping still.</i>] I bought +those clothes for him. Now are you satisfied?</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. And who are you?</p> + +<p>KATE. A friend.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. So--it's <i>that</i> kind of a deal. I wondered who you +were.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Angry.</i>] Does that go in your report?</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. Yes, that will go in my report.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. The lady's name and address, I suppose--and whether she is +married or single?</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. You needn't be sarcastic.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. And if she is married, do you notify the husband?</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. I don't think there is any ruling on that.</p> + +<p>[KATE, <i>unseen, gets hold of report and holds it behind her.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. Well, what will happen in this case?</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. I don't know. I shall turn in my report.</p> + +<p>KATE. Oh no you won't. Not <i>this</i> report! [<i>She tears and crumples +it.</i>].</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. How dare you?</p> + +<p>KATE. Get out!</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. I'll report you.</p> + +<p>KATE. You haven't got my name and address yet.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. I'll send the chief investigator here.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Madam, you will do nothing of the sort. Or I'll report you.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. You will? To whom?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. To a New York newspaper which would just love the story of +a noble case worker and how well she works her cases.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. The impudence!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. And your picture. I always illustrate my own stories, and I +can draw your face from memory.</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. [<i>Whining.</i>] But I must turn in some kind of a report.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. You lost it! And Uncle Sam forgot it. It's only one of ten +million. [<i>He escorts her to door.</i>]</p> + +<p>CASE WORKER. [<i>As she storms out.</i>] I ought to report the whole lot +of you to the police.</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>As she further reduces the crumpled report to fragments and +tosses them into wastebasket.</i>]. I don't know how I managed to keep +still as long as I did. I wanted to choke her.</p> + +<p>TED. I'm sorry I ever made the application.</p> + +<p>KATE. Why did you do it?</p> + +<p>TED. It was so long ago, I thought they'd forgotten it.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Hang it, I shouldn't have lost my temper. I approve of +relief. You should be on relief, Ted--of course you should.</p> + +<p>TED. It was these clothes.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. That's tough luck. That angel of mercy should have seen you +yesterday. She would have adored that hole in your elbow.</p> + +<p>KATE. Did you really want to be on relief?</p> + +<p>TED. I need a job. The government will give one a job, but only if +he goes on relief first.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. That's it. First you go broke, then you go hungry. Then you +beg, then you take charity. Then you rake leaves--then the +taxpayers raise hell, and throw the rascals out to save the +Constitution.</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>To</i> MARTIN.] Does a man get work as soon as he gets on +relief?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. If he's a skilled worker, perhaps. But they can't invent +work fast enough. Many are still on straight relief.</p> + +<p>KATE. That woman was vile. How do people stand it?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. They stand it because an empty stomach growls louder than +insulted pride.</p> + +<p>KATE. We could report her. We could go over her head to some +responsible official.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. They have a rigid system to prevent that.</p> + +<p>KATE. No harm in trying.</p> + +<p>TED. No! I won't go near that place again.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. You're entitled to relief as much as anyone is.</p> + +<p>KATE. Yes, Ted. If you really want it....</p> + +<p>TED. I don't want it. I don't even want to think about it.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. There are plenty of fine people on relief. After all, what +is relief? Relief is ...</p> + +<p>TED. Relief! Relief! Relief!--I don't want to hear that word again! +[<i>He starts to door.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. Ted! Where are you going?</p> + +<p>TED. I am going to change my hat. [<i>He goes out.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. I wish I knew what Ted really wants.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Money.</p> + +<p>KATE. I've given him money. He hates me and he hates himself +because of it.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Naturally. The transaction hasn't been according to Hoyle. +Now if Ted were a Georgian Prince, and your grandpa had started the +ten-cent stores, it would be a different matter. There'd be +grandeur in it; intrigue, romance, finance--something to write up +for the Sunday papers. But room rent and a suit of clothes ... +that's shoddy. It's got to be Rolls Royces and polo ponies or +nothing.</p> + +<p>KATE. Oh shut up. Do you think I like the situation? But I can't +see him starve.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Damn that woman! If he could have got a job ...</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>With sudden determination.</i>] All right. If he wants a job, +I'll get him a job.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. How?</p> + +<p>KATE. By asking for it. How do you suppose? I'll go right now, +before I lose my nerve. [<i>She powders nose before pocket mirror</i>.']</p> + +<p>MARTIN. You were smart to dress him up first. Those clothes should +spell the diff between wages and a salary.</p> + +<p>KATE. I'll take anything I can get for him.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Enters.</i>] Well, I'm back.... Where's our Beau Brummel?</p> + +<p>KATE. He went to change his hat.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. That's good. [<i>Crosses to yard.</i>] Bet you never looked at +Itzy. [<i>Goes out to yard.</i>]</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>As</i> KATE <i>puts on fur coat.</i>] Funny time of day, Kate, to +start out to get a man a job.</p> + +<p>KATE. That depends on whom you have to see to get it.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. What's it to be? Bouncer at the Union League Club?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Re-enters from yard.</i>] 'Im still smells a eetle bit +soapy.--Kate! Where are you going? Ken and Laura will be here any +minute.</p> + +<p>KATE. Sorry, Tippy. I got my dates mixed. But I'll be back. Only +don't wait dinner for me. [<i>She goes.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Now what the hell? Where's she going? </p> + +<p>MARTIN. You can't tell. She works irregular hours.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. But she promised to be here for dinner. Isn't her soul her +own?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Hadn't you heard she'd sold it?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Glumly.</i>] That's a hell of a note.--I hope Ted gets back +in time. I don't want my dinner party spoiled.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. He'll be back.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. He looked nifty in the new clothes, didn't he? Laura will +like them.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Let's hope she doesn't say too much about them.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. She'll be too busy telling you what a fine husband she has.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. And her husband will tell me what a fine job he has, and +all about the sweet spirit of loyalty that exists in that wonderful +corporation. [<i>Stops to light cigarette.</i>] Jesus, Tippy, if +prosperity really does come back, life is going to be an awful bore +for us revolutionists.</p> + +<p>[<i>There is a knock</i>, TIPPY <i>goes and lets</i> KEN <i>and</i> LAURA <i>in. +They are happy and gay and terribly in love. She can hardly keep +her hands from caressing him. She finds threads to flick off his +sleeve and must straighten his tie.</i>]</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Embracing</i> TIPPY.] YOU dear!</p> + +<p>KEN. Hello--hello.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Hello, Martin,--you still a Communist?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. And how!</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>To</i> TIPPY.] Are Kate and Ted going to be here too?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You bet!</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, how grand! It's going to be like old times.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Tolerantly.</i>] For anyone who so hated those times, Laura, I +must say ...</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Positively.</i>] They were good times.--Except that you +wouldn't have me.</p> + +<p>KEN. I was an idiot.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Such a charming idiot.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Looks as if you maybe like that fellow.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Mm. A little bit.</p> + +<p>KEN. She won't admit it, but she likes me a lot.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I'll be hanged if I see why.</p> + +<p>LAURA. It's a mystery to me, too.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. And after all this time!</p> + +<p>LAURA. It's queer, isn't it? Often I look at him and I say why, out +of all the millions of men--handsome men, brilliant men, wealthy +men--did I fall in love with him?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. And when you might have had me!</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>With a terrible yowl.</i>] Oh, sweet mystery of life ...</p> + +<p>KEN. My God!</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I won't even ask how things are! You look so damned all +right.</p> + +<p>LAURA. On two salaries and no babies, who wouldn't? May I lend you +the price of a rented Tuxedo so you can come to dinner without +embarrassing our butler?</p> + +<p>KEN. Yeah--when we get the bedroom set paid for we're going to +exchange the radio for a Cadillac.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, Martin! If you have any original drawings unsold, just +name your price. All we have on the walls now is the Horse Fair and +the Last Supper. But mind you--art only, no propaganda.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I'll do a charcoal of the Palisades for you.</p> + +<p>LAURA. I forbid it. They're an invitation to suicide.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. He'll draw the Palisades from the bottom looking up. That's +an invitation to climb.</p> + +<p>KEN. There's a lot in the point of view!</p> + +<p>LAURA. Good! Climbing is much more fun than jumping off!</p> + +<p>KEN. All one needs is a toehold to get started.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I say, Ken, so you feel really started now?</p> + +<p>KEN. I sure do.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. That's great!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. When you get to the top, don't push anyone off.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. There is plenty of room on top of the Palisades.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. You've stacked the analogy on me. Most mountains don't have +flat tops.</p> + +<p>KEN. Ah, hell, Martin, you're just being stubborn. Kate showed us +your drawing in the <i>New Yorker</i>.</p> + +<p>LAURA. We liked it a lot.</p> + +<p>KEN. That's your toehold. When you've sold them six you'll be back +to pink socialism. And soon you'll be mailing things to the +<i>Saturday Evening Post</i>--and signing them!</p> + +<p>LAURA. Don't rub it in, dear.</p> + +<p>KEN. I'm not rubbing it in. I was once as radical as Martin.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Ken, Ken--don't exaggerate. As an architect, you must keep +your perspective.</p> + +<p>KEN. I was ready to go to Russia, wasn't I?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Oh yeah!</p> + +<p>KEN. I used to get sore as a pup when people said a man was radical +only because he was unemployed. But it's true. I know because I've +lived through it. A man's political views are colored by his +situation.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Shouting with laughter.</i>] Hey! Don't plagiarize Marx.</p> + +<p>KEN, Marx?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Karl Marx; you're stealing his thunder. That's what the man +wrote his big book about. Only--you see it for one man and a few +months. Marx saw it for all humanity for all time.</p> + +<p>LAURA. They're at it again. The dear little schoolboys.--Tippy, how +does one make them grow up?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Opinions differ. Bobby Benson says Mother's Oats and Buck +Rogers says Cocomalt. What do you give Ken for breakfast?</p> + +<p>KEN. I say, what's Ted doing?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. About the same.</p> + +<p>KEN. Still looking for book bargains?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. They get harder and harder to sell.</p> + +<p>KEN. The trouble with you fellows is you encourage Ted in his +weakness. Someone ought to put it to him straight. The man doesn't +realize where he's drifting.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Yes--well--that's his business.</p> + +<p>KEN. You fellows are afraid to talk to him.</p> + +<p>LAURA. What is there to say to him?</p> + +<p>KEN. Say to him? Say to him that the least he could do is to apply +for relief work.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Pointedly.</i>] Ken, you're welcome to your opinion. But I'd +advise you not to say anything to Ted about relief.</p> + +<p>KEN. Why not? There's no disgrace in relief work. You'd be +surprised how many ...</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Shortly.</i>] We know as many nice people on relief as you +do.</p> + +<p>KEN. I said relief work, not relief.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. What's the difference?</p> + +<p>LAURA. Why, Martin, there's a big difference!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Sure there is. Plain reliefers can sit on the benches. +Relief workers have shovels to lean on. It's a true class +distinction.</p> + +<p>KEN. There are lots of loafers and piddling projects,--but the +government's also doing some big jobs, some real construction work.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Martin wrote a song about that.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Really? Have you turned composer, Martin?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Just some new words on an old tune.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, let's hear it.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. After dinner.</p> + +<p>LAURA. No, I can't wait. You sing it for us now, then after dinner +we can all sing it. [<i>She picks up guitar and thrusts it at him</i>.] +Come on, Lyric Writer, tune up.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Tolerantly.</i>] Sure let's hear it.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Singing.</i>] + Then little Andy Lang of the Lake Shore gang + Said, "Boys, you know I'm countin' + Each day and week until I see</p> + +<p>ALL. The Big Rock Candy Mountain."</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Oh the Big Rock Candy Mountain + Stands on a plain of bread. + Our Uncle's got to feed us + Or soon we'll all be dead. + The more and more he feeds us + The sooner we'll be red + So serve the soup + With a great big whoop + And promise pie + Up in the sky + On the Big Rock Candy Mountain.</p> + +<p>ALL. Oh the Big Rock Candy Mountain</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Belongs to Uncle Sam. + To move the great big mountain + Will take a million men. + So come on with your tooth picks + And bring your fountain pen. + Go easy, don't jerk; + We gotta make work. + It'll take more moons + If we use small spoons + To move that great big mountain.</p> + +<p>[<i>On the last verse</i> TIPPY <i>has gone to yard and he is +now back with Itzy on a leash.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. On with the concert while I take Itzy home. I won't be long. +Itzy lives near.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Say, let me take Itzy home while you start dinner.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Right you are. I forgot a dinner has to be cooked before it +can be eaten.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Any shopping to do?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Oh, that's right. I'll have to go myself.</p> + +<p>KEN. He also forgot a dinner has to be bought before it can be +cooked.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Something tells me I'd better look into this menu.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I'm having tomato soup, and I'm going to make bran muffins. +And there are pork chops.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Pork chops in 1935! That's extravagant.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. He buys them to get the bones for his doggies. The meat we +get is a by-product.</p> + +<p>LAURA. O. K. Ken adores shoulder chops.--But what's the salad?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. That's just where I stalled. I haven't even bought the +makings.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Taking Itzy's leash.</i>] If you people are going to talk +salad, tell me where this dog lives.</p> + +<p>LAURA. No. I see I'll have to go. No salad has been provided and I +don't trust men on salad. Martin, you know where Itzy lives, so +come along and carry the packages. And Tippy, you go light your +oven and mix your muffins.</p> + +<p>[LAURA <i>and</i> MARTIN <i>go with the dog.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Laura's a peach.</p> + +<p>KEN. You don't know how much of a peach.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I'm glad you two've got settled so well.</p> + +<p>KEN. I was a fool not to do it before.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Sure you were.</p> + +<p>KEN. The trouble was, I'd lost my bearings. Thought I'd never get +out of the woods.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. The job look pretty good?</p> + +<p>KEN. I guess so.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You don't sound so sure.</p> + +<p>KEN. Oh sure, the job's all right.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Prescott a tough customer?</p> + +<p>KEN. No. That's just the trouble. He's a queer duck. Half the time +I feel he doesn't know I'm there.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. He hired you, didn't he? He pays you, doesn't he? He knows +you're there!</p> + +<p>KEN. Of course he isn't ready to use my stuff yet. Just wants me to +work it up.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Sure. That's what he hired you for.</p> + +<p>KEN. But, damn it, I've been there several months and ... +[<i>Laughs.</i>] Maybe the trouble is that I don't have to take orders +from anybody; maybe it's that I don't have to fuss and sweat over +details the way the others do. Maybe that's the trouble. I can work +on my plans in my own sweet way. Maybe that's it. Maybe I'm unhappy +because Prescott doesn't bawl hell out of me the way he does the +others.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. That's it. The trouble is you've got it too good!</p> + +<p>KEN. That's right. Maybe I've got it too good, [TED <i>enters. Now +has new hat, brown; better taste, better fit, and more becoming. He +and</i> KEN <i>greet each other with a little restraint.</i>] Hello, Ted.</p> + +<p>TED. Hello. You look fine. Married life must agree with you.</p> + +<p>KEN. Nothing like it. Married life, <i>and work</i>.</p> + +<p>TED. Oh yes, work. You do have a job, haven't you?</p> + +<p>KEN. Yes, you bet I have.</p> + +<p>TED. And a job's a job, even if it falls from the moon.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. The moon? Are there capitalists on the moon?</p> + +<p>TED. Do all jobs come from capitalists?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Don't they?</p> + +<p>TED. Ask Martin. He says there are no capitalists in Russia but +lots of jobs.</p> + +<p>KEN. God, are you going Red, Ted?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Ted's not going anywhere, but I'm going to the kitchen to +start the muffins. The rest of the dinner is on the way, Ted. So +lick your chops for a feast.</p> + +<p>[<i>He goes. There is an awkward pause, during which</i> TED +<i>self-consciously removes his coat under</i> KEN'S <i>curious eyes.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. Nice outfit.</p> + +<p>TED. Glad you like it.--Going to be like old times. Regular reunion +of the Class of '29.</p> + +<p>KEN. Yes.</p> + +<p>[<i>Pause.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. Where's Laura?</p> + +<p>KEN. She's gone out to do some shopping.</p> + +<p>TED. Oh. With Kate?</p> + +<p>KEN. No. Kate wasn't here.</p> + +<p>TED. She was here before.</p> + +<p>KEN. She wasn't when we came.</p> + +<p>TED. Oh!</p> + +<p>KEN. Laura went with Martin.</p> + +<p>TED. Shopping?</p> + +<p>KEN. That's right.</p> + +<p>[<i>Pause.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. Great to have the whole bunch together again, huh?</p> + +<p>KEN. Yes, great.</p> + +<p>[<i>Pause.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. You seem satisfied with your job.</p> + +<p>KEN. Hell yes. It's a great job. The salary isn't anything to boast +of--yet. But the future looks like a million. You see, Prescott +didn't hire me for any routine detail. He has men for that. His +object in taking me on was to develop for him my plans for +fabricated housing.</p> + +<p>TED. Sounds fine.</p> + +<p>KEN. Christ, Ted, do you realize what it means, after you've wasted +years, to get back and do <i>real</i> work?</p> + +<p>TED. Must feel <i>great</i>.</p> + +<p>KEN. Ted, why don't you get a job?</p> + +<p>TED. I haven't turned down any.</p> + +<p>KEN. But have you been going about it in the right way? Of course I +realize you haven't any real professional training. But you know +the rare books racket. There must be a lot of money in publishing +limited editions. What's wrong with that business?</p> + +<p>TED. Unfortunately, the people I know don't consider me a business +man.</p> + +<p>KEN. What you are and how you're considered isn't important. It's +the way you go after things.--The trouble with you is you got +started down and just kept on going down.--Oh, I know how that is. +It looked that way for me once. Things were awful.</p> + +<p>TED. They've changed for you, haven't they?</p> + +<p>KEN. Sure. They've changed for everybody. The whole spirit of the +country has changed. Man, don't you feel it?</p> + +<p>TED. I can't say that I do.</p> + +<p>KEN. We've turned that famous corner, and it's time for you to wake +up and get out of your rut.</p> + +<p>TED. All right. You know how. Suppose you tell me.</p> + +<p>KEN. You still think there's something wrong with the world when +your troubles are purely personal.</p> + +<p>TED. My troubles are ... All right. What about the other millions +of unemployed?</p> + +<p>KEN. They're incompetents. Common laborers and workmen in +industries that died--like soft coal mining. And maybe some +technological unemployment. But you're not in any narrow technical +field. As a matter of fact in not being specialized you actually +have an advantage. All you've got to do is go after things.</p> + +<p>TED. Easy to say.</p> + +<p>KEN. Easy to do. Part of your trouble is your environment.</p> + +<p>TED. My environment?</p> + +<p>KEN. Sure. Tippy here is make-shifting--but that's all right. It's +something. Martin's radical, living off his wits. That's not your +style. Neither of them can help you.</p> + +<p>TED. They have helped me.</p> + +<p>KEN. They've weakened you. For Christ's sake, Ted, snap out of it. +Get away from here. Get away from it all. Make a break. You won't +starve. If you can't get a real job, go on relief.</p> + +<p>TED. Relief!</p> + +<p>KEN. I know relief isn't pleasant for a man like you. But hell, +it's better than ...</p> + +<p>TED. Let's not discuss it.</p> + +<p>KEN. It's high time you did discuss it. You can't go on the way +you're doing.</p> + +<p>TED. Did I ask for your advice?</p> + +<p>KEN. Now don't get sore. I'm trying to help you.</p> + +<p>TED. The hell with your help!</p> + +<p>KEN. All right. You don't want advice and you won't take it. What +are you going to do? Go on living off Kate forever?</p> + +<p>TED. That's my affair.</p> + +<p>KEN. It's your affair, but everybody knows it. And everybody knows +what it is. It's the second oldest profession in the world--and the +lousiest one.</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Wildly.</i>] Drop it, I say!</p> + +<p>KEN. You know where Kate gets her money and how she earns it.--And +you know what that makes you.</p> + +<p>[<i>With an inarticulate cry</i>, TED <i>tries to stop him, but</i> KEN +<i>goes on almost in spite of himself</i>'.] A pimp! That's what it +makes you. A pimp.</p> + +<p>TED. Damn you! Damn you!</p> + +<p>KEN. It doesn't sound pretty, does it?</p> + +<p>TED. Not from you.</p> + +<p>KEN. It will sound the same no matter where it comes from.</p> + +<p>TED. Not from you.--Because we're in the same boat. We're in the +same boat, do you hear? We're in the same boat!</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Contemptuously.</i>] The hell you say!</p> + +<p>TED. You'd rather die than accept favors from a woman, wouldn't +you?</p> + +<p>KEN. You bet you ...</p> + +<p>TED. You'd rather eat Salvation Army bean soup than go on living +off your father, too.</p> + +<p>KEN. Sure. So I got out and got a job.</p> + +<p>TED. A job. What kind of a job? [<i>Hysterically.</i>] Who got that job +for you? Who is paying your salary?</p> + +<p>KEN. Ah, you're crazy!</p> + +<p>TED. I'll tell you who got you that job and I'll tell you who's +paying your salary. Your father.</p> + +<p>KEN, You're a god-damned liar.</p> + +<p>[MARTIN <i>and</i> LAURA <i>enter, their arms laden with bundles.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. Prescott is just a go-between. It's your father who's paying +your salary!</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>In horror.</i>] Ted!</p> + +<p>TED. Ask her. She knows. It was her idea.--If I'm a pimp, what does +that make you? [<i>Takes his hat and coat, brushes by her and streaks +out.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Unconvincingly.</i>] He's crazy. He's--crazy.</p> + +<p>[<i>Silence,</i> LAURA <i>leans against the table, as though she had +difficulty in breathing</i>, TIPPY <i>enters, apron on, egg beater in +hand.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Hello. You back? [<i>Takes groceries.</i>] What's up? [<i>No +answer.</i>] Where's Ted? [<i>No answer.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>To</i> LAURA.] What are you whimpering about? [<i>Seizes her by +the arms.</i>] It's true. What he said was true, wasn't it? [<i>She +tries to speak, but cannot.</i>] Who got my job for me? Who is paying +my salary? Answer me!</p> + +<p>LAURA. Your father.</p> + +<p>KEN. My father! How could he do such a thing?</p> + +<p>LAURA. It was my idea. I--I told him to do it.</p> + +<p>KEN. You. You did that to me.</p> + +<p>LAURA. I wanted to help you.</p> + +<p>KEN. It takes a woman to do a thing like that.</p> + +<p>LAURA. I loved you.</p> + +<p>KEN. It takes love.--That's what love is. [<i>He goes to door.</i>] +That's what it does to a man. [<i>Pause. The room is deathly quiet.</i>] +And when I was a boy I used to wonder why some of the world's +wisest men hung out with whores.</p> + +<h2>CURTAIN</h2> + +<hr/> + +<p> </p> + +<h1>ACT III</h1> + +<p> +<i>Same. Several hours later, about 10 P. M.</i> TED <i>is sitting in a +corner with a book, but unable to concentrate. He is wretchedly +unhappy and jumpy.</i></p> + +<p>LAURA <i>paces back and forth.</i></p> + +<p>MARTIN <i>sits at a table with a pencil, sketching, evidently +using</i> TED, <i>whose face is exposed to him in profile, as a model.</i></p> + +<p><i>There is an air of tense, long waiting. Little is said, and then +spoken in quick and jerky tempo, with long pauses</i>.</p> + +<p>LAURA. If I only knew where he was.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. He's best alone, wherever he is--until he gets ready to +come home.</p> + +<p>[<i>Silence.</i>]</p> + +<p>LAURA. If I knew he was all right!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. He's all right.</p> + +<p>[<i>Silence,</i> LAURA <i>sits down apart from the others</i>, TED <i>rises and +crosses to her. She does not look at him. He speaks haltingly.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. Laura. Is there anything I can do? I am very sorry, very sorry +it happened.</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Without looking up.</i>] What good does that do now? You did +it.</p> + +<p>TED. Yes, I did it. To say that he provoked me till I was crazed +with shame and anger does not undo it. That is true.</p> + +<p>LAURA. All right, it's true. What he told you about yourself you +already knew. Everybody knew it. It was nothing but words and made +no real difference in your life. But you told him something about +himself that makes all the difference in the world--and has ruined +his life and mine. [<i>She rises.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. I admit all that.</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Near hysteria.</i>] Well, then, shut up! [<i>To escape from him +she goes into kitchen.</i>]</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Dryly, as he shades drawing.</i>] The lady, it seems, would +have been quite satisfied if you had merely called her husband a +traitor to his country, a robber of blind widows, a bombastic +egotist, a thieving son-of-a-'bitch and a cock-eyed liar.</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Humorlessly.</i>] It wasn't what I called him. It was what I +told him.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Precisely. The greater the truth the greater the libel. Ken +Holden, you see, wanted to be an adult lion among the little +monkeys, and you informed him that he was still an infant drawing +sustenance from parental sources.</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Sensing</i> MARTIN'S <i>friendliness approaches him like a +friendless dog.</i>] You understand, don't you, how he provoked me?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Perfectly.</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Sees sketch.</i>] Why, that's me you're drawing!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Glad you recognized it. Some people don't recognize +themselves in profile.</p> + +<p>TED. It's a good profile. The face is good.--But why the uniform?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Clothes make the man. I wanted to see if a uniform would +make a soldier.</p> + +<p>TED. I never wore a uniform. I detest them. I'd rather be shot than +wear one.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. That's an old Spanish custom. </p> + +<p>TED. Spanish?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Custom. To shoot men who do not like to wear uniforms.</p> + +<p>TED. But why do you draw me as a soldier? What did I do to suggest +that? What made you do it?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Something in Kate's eyes, while you were posing for her, +suggested it. She seemed to think your outfit lacked something. +Well, what it lacked I have seen on parade grounds at West Point. +There it is. [<i>Holds up drawing.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Backs away.</i>] Why do you torment me?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I'm sorry. [<i>He rips cardboard across and throws the halves +into wastebasket.</i>] It had no significance to you personally, +Ted.--It's all of us. All of us who are in the army.</p> + +<p>TED. In the army? What are you talking about? We aren't in any +army. We wouldn't go in. Why, half the men you meet say that in a +war they'd be conscientious objectors. The jails wouldn't hold +them.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. But the ditches will.</p> + +<p>TED. But I tell you ...</p> + +<p>MARTIN. They jailed conscientious objectors in the last war. This +time they will shoot them.</p> + +<p>TED. Why are you Communists so afraid of war?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. We know what starts it.--It's the army, Ted, that makes +war.</p> + +<p>TED. But this country hasn't a big standing army.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. There are ten millions in it.</p> + +<p>TED. You mean the unemployed?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. That's the army that makes war these days.</p> + +<p>TED. You radicals always say that. I don't agree with you--except +about war. I think you are right about that.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Which is why the American Legion wants to exterminate us.</p> + +<p>TED. They want war. But you want revolution. You are against war +and for revolution. That's silly. Just a different kind of war. +You're both wrong. There's no sense in any of you.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. That's right. The business men have all the sense. They +know that an army in rags is more dangerous to them than an army in +uniform. So we will wear uniforms. I just tried yours on to see how +it would fit you.</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Picks up the two halves out of basket and puts them together +and stares at it.</i>] No.--No. I'll never wear one. Never! [<i>He +crumples drawing and throws it back into basket</i>, LAURA <i>comes in +from the kitchen.</i> TED, <i>looking for escape, goes into bedroom.</i>]</p> + +<p>LAURA. Tippy hasn't telephoned. That means he hasn't found Ken.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Maybe he wants to march the grand monarch in on us.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, I hope so.--He ought to be back.... Martin, do you think +Ken will ever forgive me?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Well, you know what Solomon said about the way of a man +with a maid.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Don't wise-crack.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I'm only hiding my ignorance behind Solomon's.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Do you think Ken <i>should</i> forgive me?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I think he ought to spank you till you'd have to eat off +the mantel for a week, and then take you back to his bed and board +and forget it.</p> + +<p>LAURA. If he only would.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Enters, looking gloomy.</i>] He hasn't been at the apartment, +Laura.--He hasn't been there and he hasn't 'phoned there.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. So that's that.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. There were some messages for him. The girl at the +switchboard said a man's voice asked for Ken and then asked for +you. Called a couple of times. Left no name.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Maybe I ought to go home?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Would you be any more miserable alone?</p> + +<p>LAURA. I couldn't be.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You stay here a while. I gave the girl this address and +number and told her to give it to anyone who called. I also made +her promise that if Ken came in she'd call you here at once.</p> + +<p>LAURA. She'll die of curiosity.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Telephone operators develop immunity.</p> + +<p>LAURA. You're a dear. Thanks.--But--what shall we do?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. There is nothing more we can do until you're ready to notify +the Missing Persons Bureau.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Do you think we ought to?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. No.--I hate to seem callous to your distress, dear, but +involving the police department at this moment would be a little +premature.</p> + +<p>LAURA. But I'm so worried. He might do anything, Tippy.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. The chances are he'll do nothing but take a walk.</p> + +<p>LAURA. If I only knew ...</p> + +<p>TIPPY. And what could you tell the police? Man quarrelled with +wife, left house, has been gone four hours....</p> + +<p>LAURA. It seems dreadful, dreadful--just to sit here and not know +anything.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I think I have a hunch.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, Martin! Why didn't you say so before?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I only just got the hunch.</p> + +<p>LAURA. What? Where?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Now wait a minute. It's only a hunch, and my hunches aren't +so hot. I don't believe in them, you see.</p> + +<p>LAURA. But you'll go, won't you? You'll go?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Oh, sure. [<i>Gets hat.</i>] You stay here with Tippy.</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Grabbing her things.</i>] No. I want to go with you.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Please don't, Laura. I don't know where Ken is. It's just a +mere possibility; an old dump I used to take him to. You stay here. +[<i>He goes. Just as he closes door</i> TED <i>walks into room.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. Hello, Tippy. You back? [LAURA <i>gives one look at</i> TED, +<i>grasps wrap and runs out.</i>] She hates me.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Well, there's nothing to do about it, except keep out of her +way.</p> + +<p>TED. I shouldn't have come back.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Why not? You live here.</p> + +<p>TED. Then why does she stay?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Because she doesn't want to be alone with her thoughts.</p> + +<p>TED. You think she feels guilty, too?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Well, what do you think? She tricked Ken into continuing the +thing he'd come to hate most in the world; financial dependence on +his father. She took a big chance, and lost.</p> + +<p>TED. It was my fault. I told. I never would have told if he hadn't ...</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Never mind. We know what Ken did to you. It was in his +nature to do just that.--His nature was part of the thing Laura +took a chance on too,--and lost.</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>After slight pause.</i>] I suppose it's always hard to +understand the other fellow's troubles. They seem so small compared +with your own.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Circumstances do not excuse crimes, but they do explain +them. [<i>Pause.</i>] We've all taken plenty. But I'll say this, old +man. If I'm the first member of the Class of '29 to check in at +the big Court House I'll look up the judge and I'll say to him, +"See here, God, when Ted Brooks arrives, don't judge him till you've +looked up his full record. The cards were stacked against that guy +from the start! The rest of us merely needed jobs, but he needed ..." +[<i>Pauses, not knowing how to finish.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. Thanks, Tippy.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I'll be damned if I know what you do need!</p> + +<p>TED. Guts. Guts is what I need.--My health's good enough for +physical labor, but nobody wants me to dig ditches.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Did you ever see a steam shovel at work? I don't say you're +any use to the world or have any right to live in it. But making a +hundred men like you substitute for a steam shovel is plain damn +silly. It's an insult to the steam shovel.</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>With deep, quiet desperation which grows more and more +intense through the following scenes.</i>] What should I do? What was +it intended for me to do?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Live like an aristocrat.</p> + +<p>TED. As Martin would say--on the backs of the workers.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. The workers don't seem to mind. They didn't throw you off.</p> + +<p>TED. No, but who did?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. The other guys on the backs of the workers.</p> + +<p>TED. No one in particular threw me off.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Then maybe you just fell off. The worker's back is broad, +but it's not broad enough to accommodate all of us.</p> + +<p>TED. But you're not a revolutionist?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Hell, no. I'm a dog washer.</p> + +<p>[KATE <i>enters</i>, <i>excited, out of breath.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. Ted--guess what! I've got a job for you!</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Not believing.</i>] A job? For me?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You mean that?</p> + +<p>KATE. I do. It's nothing to brag about, but it's a job.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Private industry or relief?</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Indignantly.</i>] Relief? Certainly not. It's real work.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. With real money--that's great.</p> + +<p>KATE. Oh, it's nothing fancy; but it'll pay enough for Ted to live +better than he has been living.</p> + +<p>[TED <i>doesn't grow enthusiastic, and</i> KATE <i>becomes resentful. +Sensing this</i>, TIPPY <i>keeps up the badinage.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. How many questions will you give me to name the job?</p> + +<p>KATE. Oh, you'd never guess it.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Come on, Ted, we'll alternate and spot it in ten questions. +I'm first. Is it indoors or out?</p> + +<p>KATE. In.</p> + +<p>[<i>They wait for TED's question.</i>]</p> + +<p>TED. [<i>Dully.</i>] Is it working on commission?</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Triumphantly.</i>] No. Regular wages.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Is the wage above or below $25.00 a week?</p> + +<p>KATE. It's a little below.</p> + +<p>TED. Is it in an office?</p> + +<p>KATE. No.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Would he wear a white collar at work?</p> + +<p>KATE. Yes.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Hey, Ted, use your head. That's five questions gone.</p> + +<p>TED. Do I have to sell anything?</p> + +<p>KATE. No.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Indoors. No office. Low wages. White collar. No selling. +[<i>Thinking.</i>] Does he work with his hands or his head--or his +mouth?</p> + +<p>KATE. His hands and his mouth.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. But not his head. That's illuminating.</p> + +<p>TED. How did you get this job?</p> + +<p>KATE. I got it the only way you can get jobs for anybody these +days--by asking it as a favor from someone who had it to give.</p> + +<p>TED. I see.</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Resentful.</i>] You don't seem very appreciative.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Wait a minute, Kate. He doesn't know yet what the job is.</p> + +<p>KATE. He doesn't act as if he wanted to know.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Don't get sensitive.--And I haven't played my game out.</p> + +<p>KATE. All right. Go on.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Thinks a moment, then brilliantly.</i>] Will he wear a +uniform?</p> + +<p>KATE. Yes.--You guessed it. [TED <i>grows dismayed.</i>] The job is +elevator operator in the Graybar Building. It's a cinch. You don't +even have to stop the car. You just push buttons.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Automatic. All but the phonograph. And you're it.</p> + +<p>TED. In uniform!</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Impatiently.</i>] Well, what of it?</p> + +<p>TED. And push buttons.... Floor, please. Two please. Five please. +Right please. [<i>Laughs harshly.</i>]</p> + +<p>KATE. Oh, so it isn't good enough for you!</p> + +<p>TED. Fifteen please. Twenty-six please.</p> + +<p>KATE. Well, what do you want? Vice-president in a bank? Wake up! +This isn't 1929. This is 1935. You take what you get and are +grateful.</p> + +<p>TED. Like a bellboy!--</p> + +<p>KATE. It's a job. You said you wanted a job.</p> + +<p>TED. Oh God, Kate ...</p> + +<p>KATE. It pays more than I got for years. And I supported myself on +it and you, too.</p> + +<p>TED. Listen, Kate ... [<i>Has some difficulty going on.</i>] If it were +an old freight elevator in a warehouse, and I could wear overalls, +and pull on a rope that blistered my hands ...</p> + +<p>KATE. It's the uniform that stalls you, is it?--Now I see why they +make soldiers wear them.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Wishing to save the situation.</i>] The British started that +with their Red Coats, to make them better targets so we could win +the Revolutionary War.--I learned that in school.</p> + +<p>KATE. [<i>Bitter.</i>] You got it wrong, brother. It's to take the +conceit out of a coward by making him realize he's no better than +anybody else. That's what it's for!</p> + +<p>TED. Kate ...</p> + +<p>KATE. You said you wanted a job. I believed you. I asked for a job; +any kind of a job that a man who had never worked could do. And I +got one. [<i>To</i> TIPPY.] But he doesn't want it. It's not because of +the uniform. It's because it's <i>a job!</i> [<i>She has turned her back +on</i> TED. <i>He quietly takes his new hat and coat and sneaks out. She +turns as she hears the door.</i>] He's gone. [<i>Pause.</i>] I never talked +like that to him before. [<i>With sudden fright.</i>] Where's he +going?--Ted! Ted! [<i>She runs out after him.</i>]</p> + +<p>[TIPPY <i>follows to the door which she leaves open. An elderly, +richly-dressed spinster, whom</i> KATE <i>has nearly knocked down as she +fled, stalks into the room. She glowers at</i> TIPPY.]</p> + +<p>MISS DONOVAN. So that's the kind of a place this is! [<i>She stalks +about and glares at everything.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Closing door.</i>] Good evening, Miss Donovan.</p> + +<p>MISS DONOVAN. Irresponsible people! Wild and irresponsible people! +To think that I trusted Itzy to wild, irresponsible people.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. My dear Miss Donovan, the distresses of my personal guests +have nothing to do with my professional work.</p> + +<p>MISS DONOVAN. Guests! Was it your guests who brought Itzy home?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Surely there is nothing wrong with Itzy?</p> + +<p>MISS DONOVAN. Nothing wrong! [<i>Portentously.</i>] Itzy is sneezing! He +has a cold!</p> + +<p>TIPPY. He was all right when he left here.</p> + +<p>MISS DONOVAN. Dr. Sayre, I told you never to let any person but +yourself touch that dog when he was out of my apartment.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. But it's a very short distance and the man who took him home ...</p> + +<p>MISS DONOVAN. The man you say! My maid said it was a silly boy and +a giggling, irresponsible girl. How do I know what they did to +Itzy? How do I know where they took him? Or in what company they +had him? They might have let him get into a fight and get killed.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. But they didn't.</p> + +<p>MISS DONOVAN. They, or you, exposed Itzy to a chill. Itzy is +sneezing. Itzy has a cold. Itzy may develop pneumonia and die. +[<i>During this speech there is a knock and</i> TIPPY <i>goes to door and +lets in the</i> BISHOP <i>while</i> MISS DONOVAN <i>continues.</i>] I shall hold +you responsible. If anything happens to Itzy, you alone are to +blame. I shall hold you responsible for Itzy's death. [<i>She +addresses the</i> BISHOP.] If you are a customer of this man, let me +warn you. He is not to be trusted. He is not responsible.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. There must be some misunderstanding.</p> + +<p>MISS DONOVAN. There is no misunderstanding. I brought Itzy here on +a friend's recommendation. She said it was a responsible place. It +is not. It is full of wild, irresponsible people.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Madam, I am sure ...</p> + +<p>MISS DONOVAN. You look like a man who loves animals. If you do, do +not bring them here. This man deliberately exposed my poor Itzy to +a cold. He may die.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Itzy is your dog, I presume?</p> + +<p>MISS DONOVAN. And such a darling. Everybody loves him. I shall tell +everyone--all my friends. He suffers so--I shall warn them. His +nose is running.... I shall destroy this irresponsible man's +business!--If you could look into his eyes you'd understand! ... If +you love dogs, never trust them to irresponsible people. [<i>She goes +to the door and out.</i>]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. That woman is a fool.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Some of my best customers are, Bishop.</p> + +<p>MISS DONOVAN. [<i>Opens door and sticks her head in.</i>] I shall ruin +your business! [<i>Closes door with a slam.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Jesus! [<i>Takes the</i> BISHOP'S <i>hat and coat.</i>] Won't you be +seated, sir?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I trust that lady is not as influential as she feels.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Dog lovers are gossips. But I get business by gossip as well +as lose it. By gossip, sir, and perfumed soap. The art of perfuming +dogs has a great future. It's an undeveloped field. I'm just +beginning to explore it.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You are a marvelous young man, Timothy.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. It's the Irish in me--also the Scotch.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I wish--I wish my son were more like you.--Have you seen +him, Timothy?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Evasively.</i>] Why, yes sir--earlier this evening.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I called at his apartment and was told to come here.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Well, yes--he was here. So was Laura. [BISHOP <i>sighs +heavily.</i>]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You have a nice place here.--And your business?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I don't complain. Only the customers do, as you heard, sir.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I could see that woman was a fool.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I would not dispute you.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But surely not all people who own dogs are fools.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. There are exceptions.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. At least you are busy. You are occupied and happy. You have +found congenial work. Why cannot all young men do as you have done?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Not enough dogs, sir.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. It need not have been dogs. It might have been--other +things.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. True, sir. I considered the hanging of clothes lines for +women whose husbands are mechanical morons.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. That's an ingenious idea.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. But I found there weren't enough morons. Automobiles, sir, +have taught even the gentry to use screw drivers.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I like your humor. You have enterprise and perspective. You +renew my faith in youth. I wish my son had such morale. I wish ... +Where is he, Timothy? Where is Kenneth? And Laura? Do you know +where they went?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I'm afraid not.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I must find them. [<i>Rises to go.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. The best chance is they'll be back here.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Sitting again, speaks slowly.</i>] I am guilty of a great +wrong against my son.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I'm sure it wasn't a wilful wrong.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. No. I love my son. I meant to help him. Sometimes it is +hard to know what is right and what is wrong. Timothy, I arranged +for my son to have a job. [<i>Pause.</i>] I conspired to let him think +he had secured the job in the usual manner. I fear I made a great +mistake.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I understand the spirit that prompted you.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Thank you. [<i>Pause.</i>] He called me up on the telephone and +said I had ruined his life with my meddling. He said I was an +unworthy example of a man of God. He said I had betrayed him ... +[<i>He is too moved to go on</i>,] He said harsh things--very harsh +things.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I am very sorry, sir. [<i>He feels helpless to comfort the old +man. In the ensuing, uncomfortable silence,</i> KEN, MARTIN <i>and</i> +LAURA <i>come in</i>. KEN <i>is drunk and boisterous</i>, MARTIN <i>is trying +to hold him back,</i> KEN <i>backs into the room, dragging</i> MARTIN <i>with +him</i>. LAURA <i>follows.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. I got to go in. Got to find Ted. I got to 'pologize to Ted. +[MARTIN, <i>seeing</i> BISHOP, <i>lets go of</i> KEN <i>who nearly falls</i>, KEN +<i>does not see his father.</i>] I got to shake hands with him and say, +Ted, ol' boy, you're right. We're in the same boat. We're brothers +under the skin. We are both kept men.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. My son!</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Turns slowly and sees his father.</i>] Hi, dad! [<i>Gestures to</i> +LAURA.] Meet the wife. She got the job. You paid for it. [<i>Silence. +Gestures to</i> MARTIN.] Meet Martin. He's a god-damned Communist. But +I like him.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. My son, you have been drinking.</p> + +<p>KEN. Drinking? [<i>Laughs--to</i> MARTIN.] He thinks I have been +drinking. [<i>To</i> TIPPY.] Hi! Good old Tippy. Washes dogs.--Kept +dogs. Kept women. Kept men.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Taking him by the arm.</i>] Come on, Ken. Come out in the +kitchen and have some coffee.</p> + +<p>KEN. I don't want coffee. Makes you 'member what you got drunk to +forget.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. All right, then. I'll give you some more whiskey.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>In horror.</i>] I forbid. Please, no more liquor.</p> + +<p>KEN. That's right. No more liquor. Might forget too much.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Then come in and go to sleep and forget everything.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Shaking him off.</i>] I don't want to forget. I want to +explain. [<i>Looking around at each.</i>] Dad--Laura---Tippy--Martin. +Whole god-damn Class of '29. Class of '29.... Six years. Hi, +Martin, member the speeches? 'Member the Bac-ca-laurit address? +[<i>Struts and gestures.</i>] Young men of the Class of '29. [<i>Gestures +left.</i>] This is your god-damn old alma mater. [<i>Gestures right.</i>] +And out there's the goddamn old world. [<i>Gestures left.</i>] In there +you studied four years like sons-o'-guns, stuffing your empty heads +full of useless knowledge. [<i>Gestures right.</i>] So you could go out +there and get a job. And make money. And get a house. And a car. +And a woman to sleep with. And have a baby, and vote the Republican +ticket.... And so what happens? Depressions and Democrats. And +Hoover--'member Hoover?--Hoover had to go back to Leland Stanford +libr'y to read a book to tell him why there's jobs for everybody in +Russia. [<i>He stops, looks at his father</i>.'] 'Scuse me. Hoover's all +wet. [To MARTIN, <i>belligerently</i>.'] My father's a bishop, see? +Russia's hell on bishops. This is the country for bishops. You are +out of luck, Martin. Your father made a mistake being a farmer. He +should have been a bishop. Nice jobs, lots of money. Buys a job for +his son so he can get married and have a wife and a home and a baby +and not be a Red. You think I'm a Red? Hell, no. I'm a hundred per +cent American. I'm an individualist. Americans are individualists. +Each man got his own wife 'n' his own bed. A Russian's a +collectivist. Got everybody's wife in bed.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Kenneth, my son!</p> + +<p>KEN. See? My dad doesn't like Russians. Russians shot all the +churches and made the priests go to work. He doesn't like you.--You +read the wrong books. My dad reads Mark and Luke and John--makes +him a Christian. You read Marx and Lenin and Stalin--makes you a +revolutionist. Why don't you read Hearst and Hoover and make +yourself an American?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Never mind, Ken. The revolution's all over.</p> + +<p>KEN. That was no revolution. That was only a depression. But it's +all over now. My father bought me a job because my wife told him +to. I've got a smart wife. She understands business methods. We are +individualists, and must have initiative. So my wife, she has +initiative. She says--Ken's got to have a job so we can get +married. So she explains to my father how capitalism works. Lots of +competition; too many lousy architects. So got to fabricate houses +and put 'em all out of a job.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. You talk more sense drunk than sober.</p> + +<p>KEN. Too many architects--so what? Give 'em relief work, that's +what. Make lots of little houses, with lots of little yards, with +lots of little trees, so there'll be lots of little leaves to rake. +[<i>Faces</i> LAURA.] That's why a man needs a smart wife with lots of +initiative--to get him a job.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. O. K., Ken.</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Fiercely.</i>] Do something with him, Martin.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>Going to</i> KEN.] All right, old man. Let's go in there and +see whether we can figure this thing out.</p> + +<p>KEN. I got it all figured out. Lots of little houses, 'n' lots of ...</p> + +<p>TIPPY. But we've got to figure out what to do about Ted.</p> + +<p>KEN. Ted. That's right ... Ted. [<i>The three go out to kitchen.</i>]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Wringing his hands.</i>] Radicalism and liquor. Liquor and +radicalism, [LAURA <i>is unresponsive; sits stony-eyed and +heart-sick.</i>] My poor child. My poor child.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Poor Ken!</p> + +<p>BISHOP. We must be strong. And patient. [<i>Silence.</i>] How did he +learn of this?</p> + +<p>LAURA. He quarrelled with Ted and Ted lost his temper and told.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Ted? But how came he to know of it?</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, I don't know.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Such a nice young man, I always thought. He seemed so ...</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>In despair.</i>] What are we to do about Ken?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. He blamed me. He said I had betrayed him.</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Impatiently.</i>] How are we to give him back his +self-confidence?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. He said I was dishonest.</p> + +<p>LAURA. If in some way I could return to him his lovely vanity. When +he had no job, he had no thought of me--none--none....</p> + +<p>BISHOP. What is there left for him to believe in, when even I, his +father ...</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh don't! It was my fault. Don't blame yourself. And anyway, +the only thing that matters is Ken. Don't you see?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You're right, my child.</p> + +<p>LAURA. He's so crushed! And that despair that shuts me out! Why is +it? Why is it that a woman loves a man most when he has +nothing--and he wants her only when he has everything else? What's +going to happen to us?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Everything will be all right, my child. Kenneth has +suffered a bitter blow to his pride. But he'll sober up and resign +himself to the situation.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Resign himself?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. We must make him see that that is the only thing to do.</p> + +<p>LAURA. But is it? Is there no hope of a real position?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Prescott gave me his word when I--when we made the +arrangement--that he would make a real place for Kenneth as soon as +he could.</p> + +<p>LAURA. So far he hasn't.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. It's a matter of time. Business is greatly improved. +Building must revive by the spring. Therefore, don't you see, if +our boy is patient until then ... [LAURA <i>shakes her head.</i>] We +must make him go on. If he gives it up now he may lose a real +opportunity. That is what you and I must make him see! The +opportunity ahead.</p> + +<p>LAURA. He couldn't go on.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. He must.</p> + +<p>LAURA. No. Why must he?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Tenderly.</i>] A family, my dear, is a very conclusive +argument.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Family? What do you mean?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Still with his tender sentimentality.</i>] I take it, since +Kenneth spoke of a wife and baby ...</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Half-laughing.</i>] Oh!--Thank God, no!</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But he said ...</p> + +<p>LAURA. That was just rhetoric.--I am not having any babies until I +see some security for them.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Many of the unemployed do have children.</p> + +<p>LAURA. I'll have them only when I can see safety for them.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Yes, yes. Well, I only thought that ...</p> + +<p>LAURA. That if a child were coming, Ken would have to knuckle +under.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Such responsibility has always been the most powerful force +to make man go along the path of duty, even though the way seemed +hard.</p> + +<p>LAURA. At least I have spared Ken that! He <i>can</i> do as he pleases. +I am still working, and can take care of myself.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Yes, quite right. That is the way we must present it to +him. That he need consider only himself.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Poor Ken. What can he ...</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Sh!</p> + +<p>[KEN <i>enters, followed by</i> MARTIN <i>and</i> TIPPY.]</p> + +<p>KEN. Who said I had no manners! [<i>To</i> BISHOP <i>and</i> LAURA, <i>with +absurd, ironic dignity.</i>] The boys say I wasn't a gentleman. I +apologize.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Never mind, Ken.</p> + +<p>KEN. A man ought to be a gentleman, even to his wife. [<i>She turns +away. To his father.</i>] A man ought to respect his father. I +apologize.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. I accept your apology, son.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>To boys.</i>] There you are! I apologized to my father. He +accepted my apology. [<i>To</i> LAURA.] I apologize.</p> + +<p>LAURA. All right, Ken. I accept your apology. [<i>At the end of her +self-control.</i>] And now that's enough.</p> + +<p>KEN. No. I got one more apology to make.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. All right, Ken. I'll take the next one.</p> + +<p>KEN. I didn't insult you.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. No. Well, whom did you insult?</p> + +<p>KEN. I insulted Mr. Prescott.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. Prescott?</p> + +<p>LAURA. You haven't anything to apologize to him for, Ken!</p> + +<p>KEN. I called him a lousy heel. If that's all right with you, I +won't apologize.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You did what?</p> + +<p>KEN. I called up Mr. Prescott on the telephone and told him ...</p> + +<p>LAURA. When did you call him on the telephone?</p> + +<p>KEN. Before.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. You were drunk!</p> + +<p>KEN. I wasn't drunk then.</p> + +<p>LAURA. What did you tell him?</p> + +<p>KEN. Specifically?--Specifically I told him--Martin'll like +this.... [<i>Looks about blankly, doesn't see</i> MARTIN.] I told him +that as a multimillionaire, as a captain of industry, as a pillar +of capitalistic society, he ought to be ashamed of himself for +robbing the widows and the orphans and taking the money out of the +collection baskets of the House of God to pay an architect to draw +plans for a wastebasket.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Good Lord!</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>To</i> LAURA.] You think I ought to apologize to him for that?</p> + +<p>BISHOP. If you really did say anything like that to Prescott, of +course you will have to apologize.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>To</i> LAURA.] Dad is a gentleman. And he thinks I ought to +apologize. Well, what do you think?</p> + +<p>LAURA. Oh, leave me alone, leave me alone!</p> + +<p>BISHOP. But surely that is all a figment of your imagination.--When +a man has been under the influence of liquor and then--then +recovers from its influence, how much does he remember?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. That depends.</p> + +<p>KEN. Let me explain. I know all about it. A man gets drunk in order +to forget what he had on his mind when he was sober. And then he +gets sober in order to forget what he said when he was drunk.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. [<i>Almost pathetically.</i>] Then surely you are mistaken, son. +You did not say these things to Mr. Prescott. You do not remember +what you did say--or even if you spoke to him at all.</p> + +<p>KEN. Oh, yes, I do remember. Because I was not drunk when I spoke +to Prescott. And I am not drunk now.</p> + +<p>BISHOP. My boy ...</p> + +<p>KEN. I was drunk. That's how come I was disrespectful. A quart of +whiskey makes any man disrespectful; but a cup of coffee makes a +man respect his father, and two cups of coffee makes a man respect +his wife.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Give him another cup and he'll respect Prescott.</p> + +<p>KEN. Hello. Where'd you come from?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I've been here all the time.</p> + +<p>KEN. That's fine. That's fine. Having a good time?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Punk!</p> + +<p>KEN. That's too bad. All right. Tell us what you think.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I think you ought to go home and sleep it off and then go +back on the job.</p> + +<p>KEN. Ain't got no job.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Well, I mean go back to Prescott.</p> + +<p>KEN. Didn't you hear? There is no Prescott. There is no job.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Yes, but there's work. And work is more important than the +matter of who pays for it.</p> + +<p>KEN. Work for the wastebasket?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. No. Not for the wastebasket. For whatever use it may be to +the world. Your work is important because you are creating +something. The pay system has stalled on you, so what? If your +father is able to help to keep you at work, the best you can do is +to accept it.</p> + +<p>KEN. Have you gone screwy? [To TIPPY.] IS that Communism?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. I believe in revolutions, not in futile personal +rebellions.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>To</i> TIPPY.] Do you get him?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I think so.</p> + +<p>KEN. For God's sake, do you agree with him?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Listen, old man, you believe in those plans of yours ...</p> + +<p>KEN. No. I don't believe in anything, in anything, do you hear? Not +in the love of a father for his son, or in the love of a wife for +her husband, or in the loyalty of friends--or in the integrity of +one's purposes, or in the sincerity of one's hopes, or in the +greatness of one's ambitions.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. That's how you feel <i>now</i>, Ken</p> + +<p>MARTIN. You know doggone well you believe in your work. You love +it. You live it.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Quietly.</i>] So you think I ought to call up Prescott and +apologize. Is that it?</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Why not? A son of a bitch like Prescott? [<i>A moment's +silence.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>To</i> TIPPY.] And you! [<i>To his father.</i>] And you, of course ... +[<i>To</i> LAURA.] And you ...</p> + +<p>LAURA. [<i>Breathlessly.</i>] You must do whatever you like.</p> + +<p>KEN. All right, I won't hold you responsible.</p> + +<p>LAURA. I only meant ... I can take care of myself and ...</p> + +<p>KEN. And of me, too.</p> + +<p>LAURA. No, Ken ... I ... [<i>The</i> BISHOP <i>stops her.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. So you all think I ought to apologize to Mr. Prescott. That's +great. [<i>Into telephone.</i>] Circle 7-6799 ... That's great ... +[<i>Into telephone.</i>] Mr. Kenneth Holden would like to speak with +his employer, Mr. Stanley Prescott. [<i>Plainly.</i>] The name is +Holden. That's right.--What do I want? I want to apologize. Tell +him I want to apologize. [<i>Pause.</i>] Hello, Mr. Prescott? This is +Kenneth Holden. I called up to apologize. [<i>His voice is still +high.</i>] I called you up earlier in the evening, Mr. Prescott, and +criticized our working arrangement. Well, sir, I have become +convinced that the work is more important than the arrangement, so +with your kind permission ... [<i>Listens, as to an interruption. His +confident manner slowly disappears. He listens with growing +humiliation.</i>] I'm sorry, sir. I didn't mean to use that tone. +Yes--I mean it.--Yes, sir.... [<i>Almost in a whisper.</i>] Thank you. +[<i>Slowly, with an air of absolute defeat, he hangs up the +receiver.</i>]</p> + +<p>BISHOP. My son, that was a brave thing. It's wisest for you to keep +the arrangement for the present, until ... it won't be long ... +[<i>Clears his throat; looks at his watch.</i>] My train. I've just time +to catch it. [<i>To</i> KEN.] You'll feel better about it in the +morning, son.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I'll call you a cab, sir.</p> + +<p>KEN. Good-bye, dad.</p> + +<p>[BISHOP <i>and</i> TIPPY <i>go.</i>]</p> + +<p>MARTIN. [<i>To no one at all.</i>] Damn it all!</p> + +<p>LAURA. If you'd kept still he wouldn't have done it.</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Roughly.</i>] Are you ashamed? Trying to apologize for my +apologizing?</p> + +<p>LAURA. No, Ken, no.</p> + +<p>KEN. You're right to be ashamed of me....</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Damn if anybody makes sense around here!</p> + +<p>KEN. Didn't you hear my father? He said I'd feel better about it in +the morning. [<i>Sinks into apathy.</i>] In the morning!</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Returning.</i>] Well ...</p> + +<p>MARTIN. It's been a fine day!</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Yes--great!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. That was a good idea you had, reunion of the Class of '29.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. I meant well.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Of course you did!</p> + +<p>TIPPY. We'll have one yet, I tell you.</p> + +<p>LAURA. And soon.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. And we'll all have jobs.</p> + +<p>LAURA. Real jobs--important jobs!</p> + +<p>[<i>They try to make</i> KEN <i>pay attention, but he doesn't.</i>]</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Mr. Prescott will discover that Ken is really a genius and...</p> + +<p>MARTIN. And he'll fabricate the houses; millions of houses, all +according to Ken's plans--millions and millions and millions of +'em--and all for individualists.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Hi, Laura, you'll have advance models!</p> + +<p>LAURA. Like a Paris frock.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. You'll be the envy of all women.</p> + +<p>LAURA. I know it--because Ken will be so famous; and I'll be proud. +[<i>There is a rapping at the door</i>, TIPPY <i>opens and</i> POLICEMAN +<i>enters, bringing</i> KATE, <i>who is in state of collapse</i>, KEN +<i>continues to sit staring bitterly into space. Repeats out loud: +Feel better about it in the morning</i>, LAURA <i>rushes to</i> KATE.] +Kate! What happened?</p> + +<p>POLICEMAN. Friend of yours?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Yes, that's right.</p> + +<p>[KATE <i>stares wildly, shivers</i>, LAURA <i>attends her</i>. POLICEMAN +<i>draws</i> TIPPY <i>and</i> MARTIN <i>aside.</i>]</p> + +<p>POLICEMAN. Theodore Brooks--you knew him?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Yes. What happened?</p> + +<p>POLICEMAN. Now take it calm.</p> + +<p>MARTIN. All right. Go on.</p> + +<p>POLICEMAN. Train. Subway train.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Good God!</p> + +<p>MARTIN. Is he dead?</p> + +<p>POLICEMAN. Killed outright. It was suicide. Plenty of witnesses. He +was standing with her, waiting for the train. He jerked away and +jumped just as the train came in. She'd have gone over with him if +somebody hadn't grabbed her.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. God, how awful!</p> + +<p>POLICEMAN. It was pretty messy.</p> + +<p>LAURA. She needs a doctor.</p> + +<p>POLICEMAN. Tried to get her to go to Bellevue ...</p> + +<p>MARTIN. There's a doctor three doors down. I'll get him.</p> + +<p>POLICEMAN. I guess there's nothing more I can do. I'll wait outside +and see if the doc's coming. [To TIPPY.] Your man's at the morgue +if you want him.</p> + +<p>TIPPY. Yes--yes--thanks ... </p> + +<p>[POLICEMAN <i>goes.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. [<i>Who has become aware, looks bewilderedly from one to the +other.</i>] What's up, Tippy? What's the matter?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. [<i>Quietly.</i>] Ted's dead, Ken.</p> + +<p>KEN. Dead?--Dead?</p> + +<p>TIPPY. He killed himself. He ... [<i>His voice breaks.</i>]</p> + +<p>KEN. Dead! [<i>Pause.</i>] The lucky bastard!</p> + +<h2>CURTAIN</h2> + +<p> </p> + +<hr/> + +<p> </p> + +<p> </p> + +<h1>CLASS of '29</h1> + +<h3>PROPERTY PLOT—ACT I, SCENE I</h3> + +<p><b>OFF STAGE U. R.</b></p> + +<blockquote>ENVELOPE with note<br> +GROCERY BAG with oranges and cans<br> +BOX OF TEA<br> +SMALL BAG OF SUGAR<br> +2 SOVIET POSTERS<br> +SEVERAL DIFFERENT RELIEF BLANKS<br> +2 SHOPPING BAGS</blockquote> + +<p><b>OFF STAGE U. L.</b></p> + +<blockquote>TRAY with teapot, cups, saucers, spoons,<br> +sandwiches, sugar<br> +EMPTY WASHTUB<br> +TIN CANS<br> +LARGE TOWEL<br> +KITCHEN TABLE, against backing off U. L., +dressed with plates, eggbeater, cups +and saucers, etc.</blockquote> + +<p><b>ON STAGE</b></p> + +<blockquote>GROUND CLOTH<br> +OBLONG TABLE c. dressed with:<br> + 1. Ironing board<br> + 2. Pencil<br> + 3. Iron<br> + 4. Piece of Muslin for pressing<br> + 5. One newspaper<br> + 6. Cigarettes and matches<br> + 7. Ash trays<br> + 8. Russian dictionary<br> + 9. Russian book<br> +10. Table throw<br> +EASEL AND STOOL (at window, L.) dressed with:<br> + 1. Drawing board<br> + 2. 2 plans of houses<br> + 3. T square<br> + 4. Drawing paper<br> +WINDOW SEAT L. dressed with:<br> + 1. Glass of brushes and drawing pencils<br> + 2. Brass pitcher with drawing pencils<br> + 3. Water colors<br> + 4. Magazines<br> + 5. Blue prints<br> +BOOKCASE (U. C.) dressed with:<br> + 1. Book<br> + 2. Large rolls of blueprints<br> + 3. Magazines (on top)<br> + 4. Bottles of red ink<br> + 5. Box of thumb tacks<br> + 6. Russian Primer (special book)<br> +STUDIO COUCH R.(head down stage) dressed with:<br> + 1. Sofa cushions<br> + 2. Brush<br> + 3. Newspaper (on foot)<br> + 4. Ties<br> +EASY CHAIR (D. L.)<br> +4 STRAIGHT BACK CHAIRS (1 D. R.;<br> +1 U. L. C.; 1 L. and 1 R. of table C.)<br> +DRAWING PORTFOLIO (at jog U. L.)<br> +WASTEBASKET (behind easel)<br> +PLANS AND PICTURES OF HOUSES (on walls)<br> +OLD GREEN WINDOW SHADES<br> +OLD LACE CURTAINS (on window, doors<br> +U. B,. and D. L.)<br> +BROOM at bureau (U. L.)<br> +TRIANGLE AND ODD SKETCHES<br> +(on jog at window L.)<br> +GREEN EYESHADE (on bridge lamp L.)</blockquote> + +<p><b>OFF STAGE D. R.</b></p> + +<blockquote>CHEST OF SHELVES, covered with cretonne +(against backing)</blockquote> + +<p><b>PERSONAL PROPS</b></p> + +<blockquote>TIPPY: Hat off D. R., cigarettes, stained handkerchief, pants (on ironing board)<br> +BISHOP: Fountain pen, watch, check, checkbook<br> +TED: Coat and hat (off D. R.), book "Sun Also Rises" (on couch R.)<br> +KEN: Hat (on bookcase U. C.)<br> +KATE: One five dollar bill; three one dollar bills<br> +MARTIN: Eight one dollar bills</blockquote> + +<p> </p> + +<h3>PROPERTY PLOT—ACT 1 SCENE 2</h3> + +<blockquote>RUG (on floor)<br> +BROWN REP DRAPES (on window)<br> +OFFICE DESK</blockquote> + +<p><b>ON THIS DESK</b></p> + +<blockquote>DESK SET—Consisting of: blotter, pen holder, fountain pens<br> +2 FRENCH PHONES<br> +DESK LAMP<br> +WOODEN PAPER TRAY with documents<br> +DOCUMENTS AND LETTERS (C. of desk)<br> +PUSH BUTTON (on desk)<br> +GOOD ASH TRAY<br> +SWIVEL CHAIR (behind desk)<br> +VISITOR'S ARMCHAIR (L. of desk)</blockquote> + +<p><b>OFF D. L.</b></p> + +<blockquote>LEATHER OFFICE CHAIR<br> +SHORTHAND PAD<br> +PENCIL</blockquote> + +<p><b>PERSONAL PROPS</b></p> + +<p>BRIEF CASE (Prescott)</p> + +<h3>PROPERTY PLOT—ACT II</h3> + +<p><b>OFF STAGE U. R.</b></p> + +<blockquote>RELIEF BLANKS with rubber band<br> +2 SHOPPING BAGS</blockquote> + +<p><b>OFF STAGE U. L.</b></p> + +<blockquote>KITCHEN TABLE from Act I against backing redressed<br> +TIN CANS added<br> +EMPTY WASHTUB</blockquote> + +<p><b>ON STAGE</b></p> + +<blockquote>GREEN TABLE C. dressed with:<br> + Stack of towels, 1 towel spread C. of table<br> + Cup of water and absorbent cotton<br> +SHOWCASE against wall U. C. filled with dog supplies:<br> + Harness, collars, testimonials, dog basket<br> + Ash tray (on showcase)</blockquote> + +<blockquote>CHEST OF SHELVES against R. wall dressed with:<br> + Dog brushes, dog collars, sponges, harness, dog blankets<br> + Telephone and ash tray (on top of shelves)<br> +SMALL SHELF TABLE against jog U. L. dressed with:<br> + Loose books from bookcase in Act I<br> + 4 Books stacked (on top)<br> + 1 Newspaper (on top)<br> + Book ends<br> + 2 Newspapers (on shelf)<br> + 2 Magazines (on shelf)<br> + Ash tray (on top)<br> +DRAWING TABLE (at window E.) dressed with:<br> + Drawing paper, drawings of Ted (in profile)<br> +WINDOW SEAT L. with dressing rearranged and blueprints struck<br> +MAPLE CHAIR (behind drawing table)<br> +WASTEBASKET R. of drawing table<br> +CONSOLE TABLE up R. dressed with:<br> + Newspapers, magazines, ash trays<br> +PADDED EASY CHAIR from Act I with slip cover (at console table)<br> +WINDSOR CHAIR L. of table C.<br> +3 GREEN CHAIRS, 1 D. R., 1 behind table, 1 R. of table<br> +1 MAPLE CHAIR D. L.<br> +CARTOONS (on walls)<br> +PICTURES of dogs, and supply signs (on walls)<br> +SIGN—"I CLIP, PLUCK AND TRIM" on wall over door U. R.<br> +SIGN—"DOG LAUNDRY" outside door U. R.<br> +NEW CREAM WINDOW SHADES (at window and door L.)<br> +LACE CURTAINS (on transom)<br> +WALL MIRROR over console table R.<br> +WASHTUB with water D. R.<br> +2 WET TOWELS, 1 on floor below table c, 1 U. L. of table C.<br> +GREEN EYESHADE (on hook on jog U. L.)<br> +DOG LEASHES (on jamb of door U. L.)</blockquote> + +<p><b>OFF STAGE D. R.</b></p> + +<blockquote>BUREAU from Act I against backing dressed</blockquote> + +<p><b>PERSONAL PROPS</b></p> + +<blockquote>TIPPY: Suit coat, rubber apron off D. R.<br> +MARTIN: Hat on showcase U. C.<br> +KEN: Cigarettes<br> +CASE WORKER: Fountain pen and pencil</blockquote> + +<h3>PROPERTY PLOT—ACT III</h3> + +<blockquote>(Same as Act II)<br> +NOTE: Strike package on showcase U. C.</blockquote> + +<p><b>PERSONAL PROPS</b></p> + +<blockquote>LAURA: Fur (on chair above table C.)<br> +MARTIN: Hat (on case U. C.)</blockquote> + + +<img src="images/pic2.png" width="90%" alt="Scene design"> +<p> </p> + +<hr/> + +<p> </p> + +<img src="images/pic3.png" width="90%" alt="Scene design"> +<p> </p> + +<hr/> + +<p> </p> + +<img src="images/pic4.png" width="90%" alt="Scene design"> + + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's Class of '29, by Orrie Lashin and Milo Hastings + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CLASS OF '29 *** + +***** This file should be named 17061-h.htm or 17061-h.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/1/7/0/6/17061/ + +Produced by Roger Taft, RogerTaft_AT_Cox.Net, grandson +of Milo Hastings, and Jim Tinsley. + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: Class of '29 + +Author: Orrie Lashin and Milo Hastings + +Release Date: November 14, 2005 [EBook #17061] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CLASS OF '29 *** + + + + +Produced by Roger Taft, RogerTaft_AT_Cox.Net, grandson +of Milo Hastings, and Jim Tinsley. + + + + + + +CLASS OF '29 + +A PLAY IN THREE ACTS + +BY ORRIE LASHIN and MILO HASTINGS + +PRICE 75 CENTS + +DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE + + + +DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE INC. + +ESTABLISHED BY MEMBERS OF THE DRAMATISTS' GUILD OF THE +AUTHORS' LEAGUE OF AMERICA FOR THE HANDLING OF THE NON-PROFESSIONAL +ACTING RIGHTS OF MEMBERS' PLAYS AND THE ENCOURAGEMENT +OF THE NON-PROFESSIONAL THEATRE. + +BARRETT H. CLARK, _Executive Director_ + +ADVISORY BOARD + +SIDNEY HOWARD EUGENE O'NEILL MARC CONNELLY +GEORGE S. KAUFMAN PHILIP BARRY RACHEL CROTHERS +JOHN HOWARD LAWSON ELMER RICE MARTIN FLAVIN +HOWARD LINDSAY ROBERT E. SHERWOOD SUSAN GLASPELL +ALBERT MALTZ WALTER PRICHARD EATON JOHN GOLDEN +KENYON NICHOLSON JOHN WEXLEY ARTHUR HOPKINS +CLIFFORD ODETS GEORGE ABBOTT AUSTIN STRONG + MAXWELL ANDERSON + + +The DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, Inc., leases plays, including Broadway +successes, standard plays of the past, and new plays not yet +professionally produced, for the use of college and university +theatres, Little Theatres and other types of non-professionals in +the United States, Canada, and other English speaking countries. +Please send for lists and other information. + +9 EAST 38TH STREET, NEW YORK + + + +Professional Plays for the +Nonprofessional Theatre + +THE following important plays are among those now handled +exclusively by the DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, INC. Full details and +descriptions of these plays may be secured upon application. + +_WINTERSET_, by Maxwell Anderson. +_YELLOW JACK_, by Sidney Howard and Paul de Kruif. +_THREE MEN ON A HORSE_, by John Cecil Holm and George Abbott. +_CLASS OF '29,_ by Orrie Lashin and Milo Hastings. +_ETHAN FROME_, by Owen and Donald Davis. +_THE PETRIFIED FOREST_, by Robert E. Sherwood. +_AROUND THE CORNER_, by Martin Flavin. +_BOY MEETS GIRL_, by Bella and Samuel Spewack. +_AGED 26_, by Anne Crawford Flexner. +_A HOUSE IN THE COUNTRY_, by Melvin Levy. +_SEEN BUT NOT HEARD_, by Marie Baumer and Martin Berkeley. +_SPRING SONG_, by Bella and Samuel Spewack. +_DAUGHTERS OF ATREUS_, by Robert Turney. +_WE THE PEOPLE_, by Elmer Rice. +_SO PROUDLY WE HAIL_, by Joseph M. Viertel. +_CAPONSACCHI_, by Arthur Goodrich and Rose A. Palmer. +_MASSES AND MAN_, by Ernst Toller. + + +_Send for Full Descriptive List of Plays_ + +DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, INC. + +9 EAST 38TH STREET, NEW YORK CITY + + + + +_New Plays Published by_ + +Dramatists Play Service INC. + +AROUND THE CORNER, comedy In 3 acts, by Martin Flavin. This timely +work, described as an "American play for the American people," has +just been released. It was produced in December, 1936, on Broadway +by Lodewick Vroom. Mr. Flavin's latest produced play is a dramatic +picture of an average middle-class American family at grips with +the recent depression. The author has adopted the viewpoint that +even the dark years have their aspects of comedy, and the play is a +rare mixture of character, humor and serious preachment. The play +requires only one interior setting and calls for a cast of 7 men +and 3 women. (Production fee quoted upon request.) Paper bound +books, including prefaces by the author and Clayton Hamilton, 75 +cents. + +SEEN BUT NOT HEARD, melodrama in 2 acts, by Marie Baumer and Martin +Berkeley. This new play was produced by D. A. Doran with +International Productions, Inc., on Broadway in the fall of 1936, +featuring Frankie Thomas. An entirely new twist is here given to +the murder mystery, in that the authors have placed the burden of +discovery upon three children whose intelligence and innocence are +brought to bear on an adult problem. A most ingenious mystery play +worked out, however, in terms of modern theatrical realism. The +play has one interior setting and calls for 15 characters, of whom +8 are adult men and 2 young boys, and 4 adult women and one young +girl. (Production fee quoted upon request.) Paper bound books, 75 +cents. + +_Descriptive Play Lists Sent Free Upon Request_ + +DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, INC. + +9 EAST 38TH STREET, NEW YORK CITY + + +[Illustration: A Stage scene: Photograph by Lucas Pritchard Studio] + + + + + + +CLASS OF '29 + +A PLAY IN THREE ACTS + +BY ORRIE LASHIN AND MILO HASTINGS + +DRAMATISTS +PLAY SERVICE +1937 INC. + +COPYRIGHT, 1936, 1937, BY +ORRIE LASHIN AND MILO HASTINGS + +THE AMATEUR ACTING RIGHTS OF THIS PLAY ARE CONTROLLED EXCLUSIVELY +BY THE DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, INC., 9 EAST 38TH STREET, NEW YORK +CITY, WITHOUT WHOSE PERMISSION IN WRITING NO PERFORMANCE OF IT MAY +BE MADE. + +ALL OTHER RIGHTS IN THIS PLAY, INCLUDING THOSE OF PROFESSIONAL +PRODUCTION, RADIO BROADCASTING AND MOTION PICTURE RIGHTS, ARE +CONTROLLED BY MAXIM LIEBER AT 545 FIFTH AVENUE, NEW YORK, N. Y., TO +WHOM ALL INQUIRIES SHOULD BE ADDRESSED. + + + + + +_Following is a copy of the program of the original production, in +New York City, May 15, 1936_: + +The Popular Price Theatre + +FEDERAL THEATRE WORKS PROGRESS ADMINISTRATION + +PRESENTS + +CLASS OF '29 + +A new play by + +ORRIE LASHIN and MILO HASTINGS + +staged by + +LUCIUS MOORE COOK + +Settings designed under the supervision of + +TOM ADRIAN CRACRAFT + +Entire production under the personal supervision of + +EDWARD GOODMAN + +CAST OF CHARACTERS + +(in the order in which they speak) + +KEN HOLDEN ...................... Jan Ullrich + +TIPPY SAYRE ...................... Allen Nourse + +TED BROOKS ...................... Ben Starkie + +MARTIN PETERSON ...................... Robert Bruce + +KATE ALLEN ...................... Helen Morrow + +LAURA STEVENS ...................... Marjorie Brown + +BISHOP HOLDEN ...................... Harry Irvine + +LUCILLE BROWN ...................... Olive Stanton + +STANLEY PRESCOTT ...................... Edward Forbes + +A CASE WORKER ...................... Marjorie Dalton + +MISS DONOVAN ...................... Edna Archer Crawford + +POLICEMAN ...................... Jon Lormer + + + + + +ACT I + +SCENE 1. A basement apartment on a Saturday afternoon about +one o'clock, Fall, 1935. + +SCENE 2. Stanley Prescott's office, later the same day. + + +ACT II + +The same as ACT I, SCENE 1. +About 6 P. M., Spring, 1936. + + +ACT III + +The same. About 10 P. M. + +This play can be produced without using Scene 2, Act I at all, and +has been so produced by both Federal Theatres and nonprofessionals. +This reduces the settings required to one. In case this scene is +not played, then of course the characters Lucille Brown and Stanley +Prescott are also omitted. The omission of this scene requires no +alteration of the lines or action of any other part of the play. + + + + +DESCRIPTION OF CHARACTERS + +KEN HOLDEN. _A young man about 28 or 29, a graduate of Harvard. +Trained as an architect. But unemployed since his graduation. He is +in love with "Laura." But is very dispirited at his inability to +obtain employment_. + +TIPPY SAYRE. _About the same age as Ted. Also a graduate of +Harvard. He also has been unable to find employment. But is a man +of very happy-go-lucky type whom it is hard to dishearten. He is +making a living by washing dogs_. + +TED BROOKS. _Age 28. Also a Harvard graduate of the same class as +the others and also unemployed since graduation. He comes of +wealthy parents who lost their money in the market crash. And seems +quite unable to find any work for which he is suited. And has no +special training. He is being partly supported by Kate Allen who is +in love with him_. + +MARTIN PETERSON. _About the same age as the others, also a graduate +of Harvard. He is an artist and is making a little money. He is +also a very enthusiastic Communist._ + +KATE ALLEN. _About the same age as the men. She is a graduate of +Vassar, but although she is working she only earns a small salary, +half of which she gives to Ted, with whom she is in love_. + +LAURA STEVENS. _A pretty girl of about the same age as the others. +A graduate of Vassar. She is in love with Ken Holden and is working +at a salary of about $25 a week_. + +BISHOP HOLDEN. _A bishop and typical gentleman of his calling. Ken +Holden is his son_. + +LUCILLE BROWN.* _A young girl. She is secretary to Stanley +Prescott_. + +STANLEY PRESCOTT.* _A successful American business +man. Hard, conservative_. + +CASE WORKER. _A middle-aged woman, working as a +home relief investigator_. + +MRS. DONOVAN. _A very flamboyant woman of middle +age, fussy and silly type_. + +POLICEMAN. _A typical New York policeman_. + +* NOTE: These characters are not in the play in case Scene 2, + Act I, is omitted. + + + + + + +CLASS OF '29 + +ACT I + +SCENE I: _It is Saturday afternoon, about one o'clock._ + +_The room is a large one in an old brown-stone house. The ceiling +is high, the floor ancient. It serves for a sleeping as well as a +living room. Off it at one end is a kitchen, at the other a small +bedroom._ + +_There is no woman's touch in the place, but in spite of its +dilapidation there is a mellow and intellectual air--lent, perhaps, +by the books and magazines that lie scattered about; some old +college pennants on the wall; also both architectural drawings and +original cartoons. There is a good architect's drawing board in +use by a window and a rack containing many rolls of drawings and +prints_. + +TED _is sitting on the couch, reading an old book. He wears a once +excellent but now threadbare suit_. + +TIPPY _wears shabby old dressing gown, short. He has no trousers +on. He is pressing his pants on an ironing board._ + +_Each is silent and preoccupied_, KEN _makes a finishing touch with +color brush, then turns his board down to a more vertical position +and backs off, surveying his work_. + +KEN. Take a squint at that, Tippy. + +[TIPPY _carefully turns iron on end and steps over to look at +drawing._] + +TIPPY. H'm. Very charming. Very charming. If Comrade Stalin could +see that he would order one for each member of his harem. + +KEN. That's a bum joke. Not even Hearst has accused Stalin of +irregularity in his private life. + +TIPPY. Sorry. That comes of my not reading Hearst. + +KEN. What's more, this drawing's not intended for the Soviets. It's +distinctly American. + +TIPPY. But Ken, they like it Americanskee. They approve of the way +we _do_ our living, if not of the way we _get_ it. + +KEN. They like our gadgets. The plans I sent to Moscow were all +American inside. But the exteriors were different. + +TIPPY. [_Slaps him on shoulder and returns to pants pressing._] +Well, keep at it, old man. All things come to those who work while +they wait. + +KEN. Work. I just do this to keep from going nuts. + +TIPPY. O. K. Keep occupied. American recovery may yet prove +speedier than Soviet red tape. + +KEN. I've given up hope of hearing from Moscow. It's been five +months ... + +TIPPY. Make allowances for bureaucracy, Ken. +They're in such a hurry over there they haven't time to do +anything. + +KEN. [_Starts to remove drawing._] I don't want Martin to see this. +He'd never forgive me if he knew I'd quit working on stuff for +Russia. + +TIPPY. Hi, Ted! Give a look on your fellow artist's work. + +[KEN _stands aside_, TED _rises politely, keeping finger in place +in book and looking at drawing briefly._] + +TED. [_Indifferently._] It's very nice. + +[_He goes back to couch and his book_, KEN _removes drawing and +rolls it up_. TIPPY _finishes pants and cuts off iron_, MARTIN'S +_voice heard in hall, singing._] + +MARTIN. Belaya armeya chornee barone + Snova gotovyat nam tsarskee trone + [MARTIN _enters, marching and singing._] + No ot tigee doe bretanskeye Morye + [_Stamps and accents each syllable._] + Anneya krasnaya vsekh seelnaye. + +TIPPY. Jesus, Martin, why don't you get Billy Rose to write a new +song for the Red Army? + +MARTIN. As soon as Ken learns Krasnaya Armeya I'll teach him the +International. + +TIPPY. I can bellyache the Armeya better now than he can. + +MARTIN. Damned pity you won't study Russian with us. You have a +natural gift for languages. + +TIPPY. The reason Russian is easy for me is because I never learned +the alphabet. + +KEN. Boy, what an alphabet! + +MARTIN. [_Snapping his fingers._] Da, da, da--ah, be, ve, ge. + +TIPPY. [_Picking up book._] Ya, ya, ya,--vas ist das? Das ist ein +buch. + +KEN. Da, da, da,--chto etto takoye? Etto kneega. + +MARTIN. Fine. Let's go. [_Holds up pencil._] Chto etto takoe? + +KEN. Etta karandash. + +MARTIN. [_Stands book on table._] Chto? + +KEN. Kneega stoeet na stolom. + +MARTIN. [_Throws book under table._] Gdye kneega? + +KEN. Kneega pod stalom. + +MARTIN. Great! Now make a sentence of your own. + +KEN. [_Lamely._] Tovarisch Stalin ... [_Stalls._] + +TIPPY. [_Cutting in smartly._] Krasnaya armeya pod stalom. [TIPPY +_hangs pants on chair back, and puts away ironing paraphernalia._] + +[MARTIN _goes to book shelf and gets Russian reader and +dictionary._] + +MARTIN. I've only a few minutes. But we can do half a page. We'll +never get it unless we keep at it eternally. + +KEN. For eternity you mean. + +MARTIN. You're doing fine with the reading. It'll help you no end +when you get to Russia. + +KEN. God, what faith you have! + +MARTIN. Sure you're going to Russia. They have millions of +buildings to build, and they can't train architects fast enough. +[_Finds place in book._] + +[KEN _hesitates._] + +KEN. I'm not kidding myself.--I've been doing this more to help +you. + +MARTIN. Listen, Ken. Even if you don't go, you should know Russian +so you can read Soviet architectural journals. The years we wasted +on dead languages!--Russia's alive. They're doing things, new +things, big things! Russian is the language of the next great sweep +in world progress. + +TIPPY. Sez you. + +MARTIN. You read the New York Times. Where does the real news come +from? + +TIPPY. That depends on who is shooting which. + +MARTIN. Shooting isn't news. War isn't news. War is old--atavistic, +a confession of failure, evidence of retrogression. News deals with +new things: progress, science, art, invention, the conquest of +nature. That's real news. And where is it coming from today? + +TIPPY. All right, all right. When you have learned six thousand +more verbs, each with a hundred irregular forms, then you can read +it in Pravda. + +[TIPPY _carries board out to kitchen_, MARTIN _sits at table,_ KEN +_with him_. MARTIN _finds place in book and points to a word._] + +KEN. [_Slowly, pronouncing all syllables in monotone, as_ TIPPY +_enters._] Al-yek-tree-feet-see-row-von-nuim ... + +MARTIN. [_In disgust._] Stuck on the first word. [_Starts thumbing +dictionary._] + +TIPPY. Word? It sounded to me like a derogatory sentence. + +[_Knock on the door_, TIPPY _sees envelope that was stuck under it +and picks it up. He is opening envelope when knock is repeated. He +opens door and_ KATE _enters._] + +KATE. Hello, Tippy. + +TIPPY. Hello, Kate. + +KATE. Hi, Ted. + +TED. [_Closing book._] Hello, Kate. + +KATE. [_Starts toward him but stops at table._] Hello, you bums. +How's the Red Army? + +KEN. [_Rising, glad of chance to get away from book._] Tippy just +put it under the table. + +KATE. Good for Tippy! He's the only real American among you. + +TIPPY. The only real American by conviction. Ted's American by +innocence. He won't know there was a Russian revolution until it +becomes a classic. + +KATE. [_Fondly_] That makes him very English. [_Takes_ TED'S +_book._] Is it Chaucer? Or just dear old Ben Jonson? + +TED. No such luck. It's a first edition of Hemingway's "The Sun +Also Rises." For a man who wanted it, it's worth ten dollars. + +KATE. How much did you pay for it? + +TED. Fifty cents. + +KATE. _Swell_! + +TED. As long as ignorant people go into the secondhand book +business ... It's a tedious business, but if you look over enough +stalls, you're bound to pick up something. + +TIPPY. I'm sorry to be sordid in this literary atmosphere, but if +you really have a book worth ten bucks, you'd better sell it. + +TED. I will if I can find the right man. + +TIPPY. Well--the landlord informs us that he has a more desirable +tenant who wants these quarters. He gives us till tomorrow morning +to raise the rent or he will out us kick. + +[KEN _turns away and putters with his drawing instruments_, TED +_goes into bedroom._] + +MARTIN. [_Who has been absorbed in dictionary._] Hell, it means +electrification! + +TIPPY. Then would I shock you by telling you that the landlord +means business? + +MARTIN. Huh? Oh rent! All right, I have my share. Here, take it +now. + +[_Hands_ TIPPY _eight dollars_, KATE _takes money out of her +purse_, TIPPY _takes it quietly, nodding understanding._] + +KATE. [_With gesture toward bedroom_.] If he does sell his book, +take his eight dollars and hold it. He may not find a ten-dollar +book next month. + +[TIPPY _goes to put money in pocket and discovers he has no pants +on._] + +TIPPY. Hell. I have no pants.... Sorry, Kate. [_He grabs pants off +chair and goes into bedroom._] + +MARTIN. Why don't you quit it, Kate? You aren't helping Ted. You're +ruining him. + +KATE. I'm only lending him the money. He'll pay it back. + +MARTIN. Like hell he will! The man's been a deadbeat for years. + +KATE. [_Desperately._] Martin! + +MARTIN. He borrowed off his prosperous friends till he exhausted +that source. + +KATE. He sold them books. + +MARTIN. Sold nothing!--Disguised gifts. He made the mistake of +naming prices. Fooled me for a while. Then I happened to meet a +real second-hand books man. + +KATE. [_Angrily._] What business was it of yours, checking up on +him? + +MARTIN. None whatever, so long as it hurt only him and you. + +KATE. You boys need his rent. As long as you get it, why can't you +treat him like a gentleman? His pride is all he's got left. + +[TED _re-enters. Wears different tie, good fall topcoat, not new. +His hat and book in his hand._] + +TED. The man I think should have this book happens to be out of +town. But I know someone else who might take it. I'll go and see +him. + +[TIPPY _enters, bathrobe gone, pants on._] + +MARTIN. Just a minute, Ted. I've just been told I'm butting in on +something that's none of my business. So, having been accused, I'm +going to justify it. + +[TIPPY _tries to gesture him to shut up._] + +TED. Yes? + +MARTIN. You've been imposing on Tippy here, who is too damned +charitable to speak in his own behalf. + +TIPPY. You're not speaking for me, Martin. + +MARTIN. All right, then, I'm speaking for myself. Here is Tippy, a +sanitary engineer, cashing in on his education by washing dogs. +He's making a little money. But he could make a lot more if he had +a place of his own. + +TIPPY. I'll have it. I'll have it. Give me time. + +MARTIN. You'll not have it so long as you let people sponge on you. + +TIPPY. That's my business. + +MARTIN. You paid Ted's share of the rent last month, [KATE _looks +surprised._] So this month, if Ted stays here he pays not eight but +sixteen dollars. And you stick eight in the savings bank for that +dog laundry. + +TIPPY. Now just wait a minute. I can explain last month's ... + +MARTIN. I'll not wait for you to think up another kind lie. God +knows I don't enjoy hurting Ted. He was born and raised a +capitalist and an aristocrat. Now he is a cast-off wreck of the +system that made him. I hate the system, not the men it makes--and +least of all the weak ones it throws into the scrap heap. [_Sees +that all are hurt and offended._] Damn it, I'm sorry. My infernal +sense of justice got the better of me. [_He goes out._] + +TED. [_With stolid anguish. To_ KATE.] I'm guilty. I took my rent +money and bought this topcoat at a second-hand store. + +KATE. You said a friend gave it to you. + +TED. I haven't a friend left who'll even give me cast-off clothing. + +KATE. But why did you have to lie about it? + +TIPPY. That coat's an investment. You can't peddle books on Park +Avenue without a topcoat.--Go along and cash in on your investment. +Sell that book. + +KATE. I hope you can. + +TED. I probably can--by going through another half hour as pleasant +as this one. [_He goes, shutting door sharply. There is a brief +silence._] + +KEN. Well, I might as well tell you I haven't got my share of the +rent, either. + +TIPPY. What's the matter? Check late? + +KEN. No.--I sent it back. + +TIPPY. You what? + +KEN. I sent it back. + +KATE. Did your father lose his job? + +KEN. Bishops don't lose their jobs. + +TIPPY. So what are you talking about? + +KEN. I've been living off dad for five years. + +TIPPY. Starving off him. + +KEN. Don't blame dad. I set the amount under Hoover. Bishops aren't +economists. + +TIPPY. You sent the check back and asked for a new deal? + +KEN. No. + +TIPPY. [_Patiently._] Why _did_ you send the check back? + +KEN. I'm through letting dad pay me for piddling around here. + +TIPPY. But Ken, be reasonable. The landlord must eat. + +KEN. Then give him back this place. He can eat the cockroaches. + +TIPPY. No tickee, no shirtee; no money, no housee. [_Pause._] And +there's the little matter of our own nutrition. + +KEN. I don't expect you and Martin to feed me. + +TIPPY. I doubt if we could. + +KEN. Martin's right, Tippy. You ought to clear out of here and take +that place you wanted. + +TIPPY. Hell, that place has been taken. Bargains like that don't +wait. + +KEN. There are other places. But you won't get one as long as you +stay here and we graft off of you. You've been buying half the grub +for the four of us. You fudge the bills against yourself. You're a +goddam fool. + +TIPPY. Must you bring that up? + +KEN. Listen, Tippy. Martin can take care of himself, anywhere. He +loves flop houses and flop people. + +TIPPY. And what about Ted? + +KEN. Ted is Kate's problem. + +KATE. Why do you feel so bitter toward him? + +KEN. [_Savagely._] If you'll recall, we only took him in +temporarily because your mother was coming. + +[_Angrily, to_ TIPPY.] Why the hell do you have to plan for Ted? Or +Martin? Or me? I'm not planning for anyone.--I'm clearing out. + +TIPPY. Where are you going? + +KEN. That's my affair. I'm packing tonight and leaving tomorrow. +[_He goes into bedroom._] + +KATE. Lord, what a mess! + +TIPPY. Katie, I'm afraid our children are showing too much spirit. + +KATE. What's Ken planning? Going on Laura? + +TIPPY. Lord, no. + +KATE. I'd hardly think so with all that bluff at independence! +[_Pause._] + +TIPPY. How much did you girls, as seniors, put down as your +expectation of earning power in five years? + +KATE. We didn't do such sordid things at Vassar. And besides, it's +been six years, not five. + +TIPPY. Class of '29. Six years, and six of us. Well, we've stuck +together. In solidarity there is strength. + +KATE. This looks like a bust up. + +TIPPY. Look here, Kate, you'll take care of Ted, won't you? + +KATE. Why should I? + +TIPPY. [_Snappily._] As an investment. Business is picking up. +Stocks are going up. Culture is coming back. More dogs are being +washed. Rare books will come next. + +KATE. So what? + +TIPPY. Ted was born a gentleman. The rest of us merely went to +Harvard. + +KATE. Believe it or not. + +TIPPY. Katie, the coming revolution is poppycock. What's coming is +the same damn thing we used to have. And when it gets back it'll +take its old darlings back into its lap. Ted is one of them. So +hold his hand a little longer. + +[_There is a hanging against the door with a foot._ TIPPY _opens +door, and_ LAURA _enters with a tall sack of groceries, which she +shoves into_ TIPPY'S _arms._] + +LAURA. Hello. Where's the gang? + +TIPPY. Some are in and some are out. + +KATE. We speak of Fortune and Dame Fortune walks in. + +LAURA. Bringing her own tea. + +TIPPY. Fortune. Tea. Ceres. Cornucopia. [_Drops bag on arm, posing +as Goddess with the horn of plenty, and spewing groceries over the +table, fruit rolling to floor._] + +KEN. [_Entering from bedroom._] What in ...? + +TIPPY. Tea. + +KATE. Thank God it wasn't eggs. + +LAURA. [_To_ KEN.] Hello, darling. + +[TIPPY _retrieves groceries._] + +KEN. [_Severely._] What's the idea, Laura? + +LAURA. What idea, honey? + +KEN. You promised to quit it. There's plenty of grub here. + +LAURA. But darling, I can't eat canned baked beans. My ulcer, you +know. + +KEN. You haven't any ulcer. + +LAURA. Nor any baby. But doctors say nervous girls must be careful, +or they'll have both. + +KEN. Don't be a fool. + +[TIPPY _starts with bag to kitchen_, KATE _following. At door he +warns her back._] + +TIPPY. The preparing of this tea must be a strictly masculine +affair, [KATE _gestures toward_ KEN _and_ LAURA.] I'm sorry, but I +want tea. If a woman enters that kitchen, there won't be tea. +There'll be house-cleaning. [_He goes in and bolts door behind him. +She tries it and finds it locked. She pretends to be interested in +drawings_, KEN _has turned away from_ LAURA _and there is a +pause._] + +LAURA. [_Casually._] Anything new, dear? + +KEN. [_Savagely._] No. You always ask me that. + +LAURA. It doesn't mean anything. Just a little light conversation +to kill that first awkward moment. + +KEN. It means, have I got a job. + +LAURA. Have you? + +KEN. No. + +LAURA. Well, you will have one. And more than a job. Some day +somebody will accept your plans for fabricated houses. And you'll +be rich and famous. + +KEN. If I kid myself, you needn't. + +LAURA. But all this work, Ken ... + +KEN. Won't come to anything. I do it from habit. I do it to keep +from going crazy. + +LAURA. You do it because you know that fabricated houses are the +coming thing. + +KEN. Hell of a chance I'll get at them. + +LAURA. There are going to be dozens of firms in the field, and +they'll all want yearly models. + +TIPPY. [_Sticking his head in door._] Attention! Sergeant Holden, +go at once to the nearest Commissary and requisition 454 grams of +sucrose. + +[KEN _salutes and goes. The girls stare after him._] + +KATE. Now what in the _world!_ + +TIPPY. Sugar, Katie. Sugar. + +KATE. But how much? + +TIPPY. One pound. He understood. A year in Paris, you know. + +LAURA. Oh, I'm so sorry! I forgot sugar. + +TIPPY. Sorry? It gives him a chance to buy something.--Your failure +to understand the masculine nature is appalling. + +KATE. I'll bet you had sugar. + +TIPPY. Yes, we had no sugar.--Forget it. [_Exits._] + +LAURA. Oh these men! + +KATE. You said it! + +LAURA. [_Turns on her suddenly._] Kate, what's the matter? + +KATE. Matter? Why? + +LAURA. You are grouched. Ken is touchy, he wants to quarrel. Tippy +is too nonsensical, even for Tippy. Is something wrong? + +KATE. Everything's wrong. + +LAURA. Tell me. + +KATE. Martin started it. He bawled Ted out for living off me. + +LAURA. Oh, well--Martin! + +KATE. It seems I gave Ted money for his share of the rent last +month, and he bought a coat with it instead. + +LAURA. Oh. + +KATE. So Tippy had to pay again. + +LAURA, Tippy didn't tell on him? + +KATE. You know he wouldn't. Martin found out some way and told for +him. + +LAURA. Martin's a beast. + +KATE. Maybe he was right. They all but told me to take Ted back and +keep him with me. + +LAURA. And you will, I suppose? [KATE _is silent._] I'm sorry. + +KATE. I don't mind your question. + +LAURA. There's nothing else you can do, really. + +KATE. Yes. There's one thing. There's another man. + +LAURA. Are you serious? + +KATE. _He_ is. Serious, and rich, and--sixty. + +LAURA. That beastly old man! + +KATE. Every time he said "I'm an old man" I'd say, "Oh, no, Mr. +Selden" till I convinced him. + +LAURA. So what, Kate? + +KATE. So he thinks he wants me for myself alone. He isn't the least +bit vicarious. + +LAURA. Kate, do be serious. + +KATE. He wants to reduce his income tax by gifts to eleemosynary +institutions. Don't I look eleemosynary? + +LAURA. No. Nor mercenary, either. + +KATE. Ah, but I am. And I've been buying love long enough to have +learned the trade. So now I'm going to sell some. + +LAURA. And Ted? + +KATE. [_Bitterly._] What about him? + +LAURA. You love him. + +KATE. No, I don't, I used to love him.... But I don't any more. You +can't stay crazy about a man when you give him half your salary +every week. You get to hate him.... Oh, it's worse than hate. It's +contempt. + +LAURA. You've stuck it out so long. + +KATE. Too long. + +LAURA. It'll be different as soon as he strikes something. + +KATE. Strikes what? Gold or oil? + +LAURA. He'll find something. It takes time. + +KATE. Time is the only thing I haven't got to spare. Look, I'm +twenty-seven. + +LAURA. But you don't look it. + +KATE. I do--I have wrinkles. + +LAURA. Don't be silly. + +KATE. Around the eyes. + +LAURA. You're imagining. + +KATE. And yesterday I found a gray hair. + +LAURA. Girls of eighteen sometimes have gray hairs. + +KATE. But I feel old! And if I don't look it now, I will soon. +[_Pause._] What am I to do, Laura? Keep on working at eighteen +dollars a week till I'm forty?--I haven't a decent thing to wear. +I haven't had a new coat in three years. [_Feverishly._] And I'm +frightened. Calendars frighten me.--I want to have some fun. I want +a man to take me to the Ritz and--pay the check. + +LAURA. I know how you feel. Don't you think that I ... What do you +want me to say, Kate? + +KATE. There is nothing to say. + +LAURA. Look, dear. I don't say you should keep Ted. Drop him and go +it alone a while. If you've been living on nine dollars a week, +eighteen will seem a fortune. + +KATE. And what will become of him? + +LAURA. If you _are_ leaving him you can't worry about that. + +KATE. I do worry about it. That's one of the reasons I'll take the +old man and his money. + +LAURA. You're crazy! + +KATE. Am I? + +LAURA. That's something that--that just isn't done! + +KATE. A lot you know. + +LAURA. Kate ... + +KATE. Oh, stop it! That just isn't done! You don't know anything. +You don't even know how I feel ... week after week giving Ted +money. You've been in love with a man whose fond papa's supported +him so you haven't had to soil your lovely ethics with dirty money. + +LAURA. Darling ... + +KATE. Don't darling me. And don't tell me what's decent and +proper--and what isn't done! + +LAURA. I didn't mean ... + +KATE. You didn't mean anything because you don't know anything. But +maybe you're going to learn.--Maybe now you're going to learn +because this gang is breaking up. Not only because my man is a +dead-bent, but because yours is broke.--So now maybe you'll try +keeping a man and see how it feels! + +LAURA. Kate! + +[KATE _slams out, brushing_ KEN, _who enters, violently aside._] + +KEN. What's the matter with her? + +LAURA. Nothing. + +[KEN _hands sugar to_ TIPPY _and returns._] + +KEN. She didn't act like it was nothing. + +LAURA. She's going to leave Ted. + +KEN. Good! The man's a leech. + +LAURA. But he is so helpless. + +KEN. He won't starve. We have no jobs in America, but we don't +starve. + +LAURA. Ken, are you in trouble? + +KEN. In trouble? + +LAURA. With your father? + +KEN. No. No, indeed--I merely sent dad's check back. It's time, +don't you think? [_With elaborate unconcern._] And as for this +arrangement here ... we're getting on each other's nerves. And +Tippy ought to get out on his own. + +LAURA. And you? + +KEN. I, too. On my own. + +LAURA. But how? + +KEN. I don't know. But I'll manage somehow. + +LAURA. Oh, Ken ... + +KEN. Why don't you clear out like Kate? Forget me. I'm no good to +you. I never will be. + +LAURA. Don't talk like that. + +KEN. It's true, Laura. Face it. [_She puts her arms around him._] + +LAURA. Ken, let's get married.--We've put it off too long. + +KEN. Married! + +LAURA. Not married then. But let's be together. Let's ... + +KEN. It's too late for that. If that was what we'd wanted it would +have happened three years ago. + +LAURA. I love you more now than I did then. + +KEN. And I'm not saying I love you less. + +LAURA. Then? + +KEN. In the last three years I've seen a man I used to love and +respect degenerate under my eyes, become a lousy parasite, living +off a woman whose whole income isn't enough for her to live on +decently. + +LAURA. How can you compare yourself to Ted? + +KEN. Good God, I don't! Yet Ted was once all right. + +LAURA. Ted expected the world to support him. He had nothing to +give it. You have ability and ambition. You want to give things to +the world. + +KEN. [_Flatly._] I want a job. + +LAURA. Of course you do, darling! + +KEN. [_Fiercely._] That's all I want. A job. I lay awake nights, +saying over and over, "I want a job, a job, a job ..." + +LAURA. Oh, I know! + +KEN. I don't think about you when I lie awake at night. I don't +think how nice it would be to have you there in my arms. All I +think about is a job. If it were a choice between you and a job I'd +take the job.--What's the use of kidding ourselves any longer? +[_She is silent. He goes on desperately._] I'm not the same fellow +I was three years ago. People slam doors in my face. Do you +understand? They look at me. They see my clothes, my eyes.... +They're antagonized before they speak to me,--just as people are to +a beggar. They say "no" before I ask for anything. No, no, no. They +say it as if I were asking for charity instead of a job. "Nothing +for you." "Sorry." "Nothing today."--It makes a beggar out of you! + +[TIPPY _enters, carrying tea tray_.] + +TIPPY. Hello! Where's the rest of the tea party? [_Neither +answers._] Well, we'll have double portions, that's nice. + +LAURA. Tippy, doesn't your world ever fall out from under you? + +TIPPY. Certainly not! [_Pause._] + +LAURA. [_With forced gayety._] I say, where's Martin? + +TIPPY. Can it be that _you_ are asking for Martin! + +LAURA. Uh-huh. I'm ready for him to turn me into a Communist. + +TIPPY. That _is_ news!--Where did Kate go? + +LAURA. To make a date with her boss. He's sixty and rich--and +serious. + +TIPPY. No kidding?--No, my world doesn't drop out from under me. It +merely turns wrong side out in my hand.--Your tea, Ken. It contains +teaffein, which stimulates the heart but quiets the nerves. +Teaffein in tea is the same as caffein in coffee. But under the +profit system we don't know that yet--because no one has invented a +teaffeinless tea. + +[KEN _accepts sandwich and tea and tries to be a sport and make the +party._] + +KEN. I wouldn't need Martin to turn me into a Communist. All I'd +have to do would be to knock out the partition in the middle of my +brains and let the left side mingle with the right. + +TIPPY. As if your brains weren't muddled enough already! + +[MARTIN _bursts in, carrying two Soviet posters. Leaves door +ajar._] + +MARTIN. Hey, fellows, see what I've got! [_He hangs one up while +the others are inspecting the first._] + +LAURA. It's ugly. + +KEN. I like them. Why can't Americans make ugly things look +beautiful? + +TIPPY. [_To_ MARTIN.] Sow your seed now, Soviet sower. The powers +of darkness have been fertilizing the ground. + +[TIPPY _takes thumb tacks and bottle of red ink and goes to +kitchen._] + +KEN. A Soviet poster compared to an American lithograph is like a +Soviet film compared with the stuff they grind out in Hollywood. + +MARTIN. By God, you're right.--It's the same in all the arts. + +LAURA. [_Hysterically jovial._] 'Fess up, Ken. Who's been taking +you to American movies? + +KEN. I still remember some I saw during Hoover's administration. +You don't mean they've changed them? + +MARTIN. Only the revolution will change that tripe. + +LAURA. Gently, Martin. I just told Tippy I was all ripe to turn +Communist. But let's enter by the Socialist door. I don't like +revolutzia. It's bloody. + +[MARTIN _pours himself tea_. KEN _squints at posters,_ LAURA +_munches sandwich and giggles_.] Comrade Martin--bring on your +material dialectics. + +[_Before_ MARTIN _has chance to answer_, TIPPY'S _voice sings +stridently, as he comes marching in._] + +TIPPY. Belaya armeya chornee barone + Snova gotovyat nam tsarskee trone + +[_He is now in. A towel is tied about his head with a +big blotch of red ink over his temple. He carries a +broom as a flagstaff to which a red bandanna handkerchief +is attached as a red flag._] + + No ot tigee do bretanskeye morye + Armeya krasnaya vsekh seelnaye. + +[_On chorus_, MARTIN'S _better voice cuts in strong. He seizes_ +LAURA _by the arm, forcing her to march with_ TIPPY. _And_ KEN, +_beating time with goose step, also sings._] + +ALL. Tak poost Zheh krasnaya + Shumayet vlasno + Svoe shtik mozoleestoy rookoy + Es vse dolshnee mwee + Neudersheemo + Ette v poslednee sharkee boy. + [_This chorus repeats._] + +[_The_ BISHOP _has appeared in the open doorway; they do not see +him and march and sing lustily_, BISHOP HOLDEN _stands and watches +them in growing consternation. They see him and stop suddenly. Only_ +MARTIN'S _voice finishes the last line._] + +LAURA. Bishop Holden! + +BISHOP. What is this? + +KEN. Hello, Dad. + +TIPPY. Just a bit of fun. [_He tosses the broom with its flag into +a corner, but has forgotten to take off bandage. He steps up and +offers his hand to the Bishop._] How are you, sir? + +BISHOP. [_Shaking hands._] What is the matter with your head? + +TIPPY. Oh Jesus! [_Yanks off towel._] + +BISHOP. Were you rehearsing for a theatrical? + +TIPPY. Full dress. My wound was dressed with red ink. + +BISHOP. And that song you were singing? I couldn't quite place it. + +MARTIN. That's a Red Army song. + +BISHOP. Red Army? + +MARTIN. Soviet--Russian. + +BISHOP. So you were all engaged in a little burlesque? Sorry to +have disturbed you. + +MARTIN. Tippy was making it burlesque. He refuses to take anything +seriously. + +BISHOP. And the--uh--occasion? + +MARTIN. The occasion was that I had just brought home those +posters. + +BISHOP. [_Looking at the posters._] Ah, I see. + +MARTIN. How do you like them? + +BISHOP. The lettering has some Greek characters. I take it that is +Russian? + +KEN. Of course, dad. They're Soviet posters.--A rather distinctive +form of art. + +BISHOP. Ah, it is the unique art and the martial music you find +entertaining--or were you burlesquing a Communist meeting? + +KEN. It was just Tippy's idea of fun. + +BISHOP. [_Not quite satisfied._] But you were all singing that song +as if you know it well. + +LAURA. Martin's always singing it--till we've memorized it without +the least idea what it means. + +BISHOP. [_Satisfied._] Ah yes, of course. I once learned a Japanese +song. + +MARTIN. I'm studying Russian. + +KEN. It's quite a language, dad. It would be easy for you with your +knowledge of Greek. + +BISHOP. Are you studying Russian, too? + +KEN. Martin's been teaching me a little. I wish I had your +linguistic preparation for it. + +BISHOP. I learned Greek so I could read the Gospels in the original +tongue. + +TIPPY. That's why they're learning Russian. + +BISHOP. The Gospels in Russian? + +TIPPY. Saint Marx, Saint Engels, Saint Lenin and Saint Stalin. + +BISHOP. But--if you mean Karl Marx, he wrote in German. + +TIPPY. Hitler had him translated into Russian so the Germans +couldn't read him. + +BISHOP. You're a very witty young man. Your sense of humor will +save you from any dangerous doctrine. + +MARTIN. His sense of humor saves him from anything serious. + +BISHOP. While I don't approve of a flippant attitude toward life, +it is far better than accepting dangerous and destructive +doctrines--such as Russian Communism. + +MARTIN. Dangerous to world capitalism--but constructive of a new +civilization. + +BISHOP. Young man, may I ask if you are American born? + +MARTIN. I was born on a Dakota farm. My father was an American +kulak. An insurance company expropriated him. + +LAURA. Bishop Holden didn't come to get into arguments with you +boys. + +BISHOP. Another time, perhaps. I think I could convince you that +you're following a dangerous delusion. + +MARTIN. Thanks, Laura. You're right. I'll run along. + +TIPPY. I'll go with you. I've a bit of shopping I ought to do. + +MARTIN. I'll get your hat. [_Goes to bedroom._] + +BISHOP. And how is your business progressing, Timothy? Kenneth +wrote me about it. Don't be ashamed of it. Don't be ashamed of +honest labor, young man.--You are boarding dogs, I believe. + +TIPPY. No. I have no place for that. I only wash them. + +BISHOP. You wash them and they pay you? + +TIPPY. Yes sir. That is, I wash the dogs, and the people pay me. + +BISHOP. Ah yes. I understand. + +[MARTIN _comes out with_ TIPPY'S _hat. Picks up his own._] + +TIPPY. Clean dogs for clean people. + +MARTIN. Lap dogs for kept women.--People are desperate and +destitute.--And Tippy washes dogs for a living! + +BISHOP. It's a sad world. It's true that some have too much, and +many have too little.... + +MARTIN. But we mustn't protest. The meek shall inherit the earth! + +BISHOP. And the devil can cite Scripture for his purpose. + +MARTIN. I respect any man for his convictions. But it seems to me, +sir, if you want to save the church when the revolution comes to +America, you had better see to it that the class sympathy of the +church agrees with the class sympathy of the man who founded it. + +TIPPY. [_Hurriedly._] Good-bye, sir. [TIPPY _and_ MARTIN _go._] + +[LAURA _quickly gathers up the tea things and puts them on a tray +and goes to kitchen. In the following scene she is on and off. The_ +BISHOP _walks about, troubled and silent. He looks at posters, +picks up the Russian books and looks at them._] + +BISHOP. Russian. Why are you studying Russian? + +KEN. I find it interesting. + +BISHOP. Chinese would be interesting. Why Russian? + +KEN. I am interested in their architectural developments. + +BISHOP. My boy, you haven't it in mind to go to Russia? + +KEN. [_Evasive._] Wanting doesn't get you there. + +BISHOP. Why, of all places in the world, should you want to go to +Russia? + +KEN. There is no unemployment there. They need men. + +BISHOP. [_Impatiently._] Oof! Russia ... + +[TED _enters. He still has the book._] + +TED. [_Greeting_ BISHOP _with aloof diffidence._] How do you do, +sir? + +BISHOP. [_Very cordial._] How are you? How are you? + +TED. [_Sees_ KEN _looking at his book._] My man wasn't in. I'll go +back and try again later. Is Kate here? + +KEN. No. She stepped out. + +TED. Then, if you'll excuse me I'll go into the other room and lie +down. I've developed a frightful headache. + +BISHOP. That is unfortunate. Have you aspirin? + +TED. Yes, thank you. [_He goes into bedroom, closing door._] + +BISHOP. Now there is a fine young man who's facing a real problem. +He certainly wasn't trained for commercial pursuits. Yet there he +is--selling. Uh, what is he selling, Kenneth? + +KENNETH. [_Sarcastically._] Books. + +BISHOP. I knew his father well. A gentleman and a scholar. +Unfortunately, he was a gambler. The depression finished him. + +KEN. It's finishing a lot of us. + +BISHOP. My boy, I would not have you be extravagant, but I still +have enough. I can still support you. + +KEN. I'm sick of living on charity. + +BISHOP. Charity? + +KEN. On your charity. + +BISHOP. You are my son. What little I give you is yours by right. + +KEN. What right? I'm not a child, nor a cripple. I'm nearly thirty +years old. + +BISHOP. These are not normal times. + +KEN. They are normal for me. + +BISHOP. Be patient a little longer. Our system is not perfect, but +it's the best the world has known. It has been responsible for all +our progress. + +KEN. We're not even aiming at progress, only at recovery; only +trying to gain back something we had in the past. + +BISHOP. But how can you think there is progress in Russia? It's a +slave state; a tyranny. Freedom is essential to progress. + +KEN. I don't want freedom. I want a chance to work. I want my +share.... Other people have their share, and they have dogs. I +don't want dogs, but I want a right to have them. + +BISHOP. Your soul is poisoned with envy. + +KEN. It's a short life, dad, and mine is half gone already. There +is beauty; I want to enjoy it. There are good things; I want some +of them. Disease and death we can't help, but poverty we _can_ +help. + +BISHOP. This is Martin's influence. [_Excited._] Ken, you must not +turn Communist. Do you hear? I forbid it. + +KEN. The Inquisition tried forbidding convictions. + +BISHOP. [_Frightened._] Convictions? + +KEN. I'm fed up. [_More savage and bitter as he goes on._] One can +go on so long. Things look hopeless but you still hope. Important +people make cheerful speeches. You believe them. You _want_ to +believe them. You think tomorrow something's going to happen. +Something's got to happen! Tomorrow comes and goes--a lot of +tomorrows. Nothing happens, nothing. And nothing's going to happen. + +BISHOP. My son, you are wrong. The situation is improving. Business +conditions are already vastly better. It takes time. You'll get a +job, very soon. + +KEN. I've heard that for six years. + +[_Pause._] + +BISHOP. [_Clearing his throat; takes check from pocket._] Now this +check you returned ... + +KEN. [_Shortly._] I don't want it. + +BISHOP. But how can you get along without it? + +KEN. I'll get along. + +BISHOP. How do you propose to live? + +KEN. By sleeping on park benches, eating in our bread lines.--Or +I'll tell the government I'm destitute--or get a relief job.--I +won't go on the way I've been doing.--Laura comes and brings food; +Tippy leaves cigarettes around; you send me checks. I'm sick of +having to take from you all!--If I've got to live by charity, I +want to be free to hate charity. That's a beggar's right. + +BISHOP. It gives us pleasure to help you. + +KEN. But can't you see what you're doing to my self-respect? + +BISHOP. I don't want to hurt your self-respect. + +KEN. Then leave me alone. + +[_Pause._] + +BISHOP. [_Clearing his throat._] Have you been to see Stanley +Prescott? + +KEN. Yes. + +BISHOP. Why hasn't he done something for you? + +KEN. I suppose he can't. + +BISHOP. Prescott's my friend. He ought to do something for you. + +KEN. Oh, the hell with Prescott! [_Contrite._] Don't misunderstand +me. I wouldn't refuse any job he had to offer me. I'd black his +boots if that was the job. But I've been to see him as much as I +can. I can't sit on his doorstep and whine. + +BISHOP. Certainly not. You must not do anything that would hurt +your self-respect. [_He has been holding the check, which he now +lays down on the table._] + +KEN. Don't leave that check, dad. + +BISHOP. But son-- + +KEN. If you do, I'll tear it up. + +[BISHOP _picks up check, talks to_ LAURA.] + +BISHOP. I'll leave this check with you, Laura. Give it to him when +he--when he is himself again. [_At this_ KEN _picks up his hat and +walks out without a word. The two look unhappily after him_. +BISHOP, _shaken._] That boy--that sane youth ... What's happened +to him? + +LAURA. [_With difficulty._] He wants to break our engagement. + +BISHOP. Ah! That's the trouble then. You two have quarrelled. + +LAURA. He doesn't need me. I don't mean anything to him.... + +BISHOP. But of course you do.--There, Laura, there! + +LAURA. No. He doesn't. I feel it. + +BISHOP. Why, for years you've meant everything to him. He planned +to marry you as soon as he graduated. ... + +LAURA. Oh, he's so muddled--he's so muddled! + +BISHOP. I know how you feel, my dear, but lovers' quarrels ... + +LAURA. It's not a lovers' quarrel. Oh, don't you understand? His +morale's all shot. + +BISHOP. Kenneth is essentially sound. Now don't worry, my dear. +[_Indulgently._] I'll wait and have another talk with him, eh? +Perhaps that's what he needs; a good, sound, heart-to-heart talk +with his father. + +LAURA. He needs a job! He needs a job! It's more important than I +am--more important than you--more important than anything in the +world. + +[TED _opens the door; starts to come out; hears the tense +conversation and stands, hesitant._] + +BISHOP. You are right. Work is essential,--more essential than +love. That's what all these young people need. Something to do with +their hands, with their heads. To feel that the world needs +them--that they have a right to live. + +LAURA. That they belong! + +BISHOP. Yes, yes ... + +LAURA. You've got to find him a job. You've got to! + +BISHOP. Dear child--if only I could! + +LAURA. You've got to!--even if you have to buy one. + +BISHOP. Buy one? + +LAURA. [_Moving closer to him._] He need never know.... + +[TED _draws back and softly closes the door._] + +SLOW CURTAIN + + + +ACT I + +SCENE 2*: PRESCOTT'S _office has an air of magnificence. Seems high +above the street. In an anteroom can be seen the_ BISHOP, +_waiting_, LUCILLE, PRESCOTT'S _secretary, a smartly-dressed young +woman, is in the office, reading a newspaper. After a moment_, +BISHOP HOLDEN _comes to the door_.] + +* This scene can be omitted. + +BISHOP. I beg your pardon, [LUCILLE _looks up._] Are you sure Mr. +Prescott will be back? + +LUCILLE. Yes sir. + +BISHOP. You think I ought to wait? + +LUCILLE. Saturday's a bad day. Why don't you come back on Monday? + +BISHOP. I must see him today. If I can't see him here I shall try +to see him at his home. + +LUCILLE. [_Quickly._] Then you had better wait. + +BISHOP. Very well. [_He goes out, sits down_, LUCILLE _begins to +type; the telephone rings. Before answering, she closes door, +shutting out the_ BISHOP.] + +LUCILLE. Hello? Yes, Mrs. Prescott. Not yet, but he took the +eleven-thirty train out of Washington and should be here any +moment. [_Listens._] At the Colony? I'll tell him the minute he +comes in. [_Hangs up._] + +[_In a moment the door opens_, PRESCOTT _stands in the doorway, +with his back turned, speaking to the_ BISHOP.] + +PRESCOTT. I'll be with you in a minute, James. [_Enters and shuts +the door._] + +LUCILLE. Oh, Mr. Prescott! You had a good trip, I hope? + +PRESCOTT. No. It wasn't very good. + +LUCILLE. Oh, I'm sorry! And it spoiled your weekend, too. + +PRESCOTT. Spoiled everything. Well, it can't be helped. Anything +need my attention here? + +LUCILLE. It's been very quiet. Your wife telephoned. She said she'd +be at the Colony Club, and would you 'phone her there. + +PRESCOTT. All right. Is that all? + +LUCILLE. That's about all. + +PRESCOTT. How long has Bishop Holden been waiting? + +LUCILLE. About an hour. + +PRESCOTT. What does he want? + +LUCILLE. He didn't say. + +PRESCOTT. Why didn't you tell him I couldn't see him today? + +LUCILLE. He said he'd go to your house if he couldn't see you here, +so I ... + +PRESCOTT. Can't I get any protection around here? You could have +said I was out of town for the weekend. + +LUCILLE. I didn't think of that. + +PRESCOTT. You never think of anything.--Send him in. + +[LUCILLE _goes out_; BISHOP _enters._] + +BISHOP. Seeing you brings back old times. + +PRESCOTT. I'm glad to see you, James. Although [_Looks at watch._] +If you'd let me know I might have kept myself free.... + +BISHOP. I won't keep you long. + +PRESCOTT. Sit down. + +BISHOP. Stanley, I'm in trouble. I've come to you for help. + +PRESCOTT. [_Wary._] I needn't tell you that anything in my power ... + +BISHOP. You're a business man. + +PRESCOTT. When there is business. + +BISHOP. You believe in our American system of government. + +PRESCOTT. Certainly, certainly. The system we did have. + +BISHOP. So do I. Sincerely. I have the deepest, profoundest faith +in our democracy. + +PRESCOTT. [_Impatient with the other's irrelevancy._] The world +has not yet found anything better. + +BISHOP. But unless we do something it won't last beyond our +generation. + +PRESCOTT. Nonsense. + +BISHOP. Social unrest is growing. Young people, in their enforced +idleness, are turning away from all that we have taught them. + +PRESCOTT. [_Annoyed._] Come, James. That isn't what you came to see +me about. + +BISHOP. It is. + +PRESCOTT. You have been reading sensational papers. Of course a +depression gives the radicals a chance to spread their doctrines. +But there isn't any cause for worry. Prosperity is always a sure +cure for radicalism. And things are picking up. + +BISHOP. You are probably under the common delusion that all +radicals are wild-eyed foreigners. + +PRESCOTT. [_Bitter in his thoughts_.] If it wasn't for this foolery +at Washington ... + +BISHOP. So was I. But I find they are not. + +PRESCOTT. We should all have been out of the slump long ago. + +BISHOP. Many of them--the young ones--are good American stock. + +PRESCOTT. The Administration proclaims its adherence to the profit +system.... + +BISHOP. They have education, in some cases, background, but +unfortunately no experience. + +PRESCOTT.... and at the same time it insists on unfair competition +with private enterprise. + +BISHOP. As long as such men remain idle ... + +PRESCOTT. So how can private capital be expected to make +commitments? + +BISHOP. I don't know. + +PRESCOTT. But don't you agree? + +BISHOP. Perfectly. + +PRESCOTT. Surely, James, the depression did not hit you personally? + +BISHOP. In unexpected ways, Stanley--in most unexpected ways. + +PRESCOTT. On the contrary, the Church should have benefited. People +in misfortune turn to religion. + +BISHOP. But with empty pockets. However, I am not complaining for +the Church. It is my son I am worried about. + +PRESCOTT. Ah, yes. Kenneth. An agreeable fellow, Kenneth. + +BISHOP. Of the six years he's been out of college he has worked +only four months. Think of it. + +PRESCOTT. Is he married? + +BISHOP. No. + +PRESCOTT. That's fortunate. + +BISHOP. Perhaps. If he were married and had a dependent wife and +children he might get architectural work in a government slum +clearance project. + +PRESCOTT. Exactly what I was talking about. The sooner the +government turns the building industry back to private enterprise +the better. + +BISHOP. Kenneth's situation is tragic. He is a mature man, long +overdue to take a man's full place in the world. + +PRESCOTT. [_Impatient._] Yes, I know--I know. + +BISHOP. Yet he is classed as a dependent child. + +PRESCOTT. Well, aren't you able to take care of him? + +BISHOP. I have kept him from starving. + +PRESCOTT. You realize, of course, that he is better off than many. + +BISHOP. Keeping him alive is not the point. It is not enough. His +spirit is crushed, his education unused, his manhood wasted. He is +ambitious, wants to work, to establish a home of his own. He is +strong, and he is capable. + +PRESCOTT. Yes, yes, I understand. I deplore the waste. It is +shameful. But in any event, these conditions won't last much +longer. + +BISHOP. They have lasted a long time. + +PRESCOTT. Yes, longer than they should.--I wish I could help you, +James, but I cannot. + +BISHOP. I want you to give Kenneth a job, Stanley. + +PRESCOTT. If I could, I assure you. + +BISHOP. Any job. Anything that will make him feel useful and keep +him occupied.--Surely in an organization like yours ... + +PRESCOTT. At the moment we are doing no building whatever. One or +two small projects; and a mere skeleton staff to keep my +organization. + +BISHOP. I saw in the papers ... + +PRESCOTT. That I am interested in the mass production of fabricated +houses. Yes!--And men associated with me are ready to launch +large-scale production as soon as we are assured of freedom from +competition with cheap government money and cheap government labor. + +BISHOP. Then, surely ... + +PRESCOTT. I have just returned empty-handed from a bunch of +half-baked theorists who are heading us into socialism and calling +it democracy! + +BISHOP. With a view to your project going through, could you not +take Kenneth on? + +PRESCOTT. Impossible. My small staff has already done all the +preparation that needs to be done. My hands are tied till these +socialists in Washington are out. + +BISHOP. But has not business been given a breathing spell? + +PRESCOTT. I don't sell hot dogs. I build houses. People don't +consume houses during a breathing spell.--I tell you I could put a +capital of twenty millions at work tomorrow if we were guaranteed +that in ten years, or even twenty years, we could get our money +back. + +BISHOP. But what do you fear? You just said you did not fear a +revolution. + +PRESCOTT. I don't. I fear the continuance of what we already have. +Stagnation and semi-socialism. + +BISHOP. When could you give my boy a job? + +PRESCOTT. When a sound administration goes into power at +Washington. + +BISHOP. I don't dare to make him wait. + +PRESCOTT. Then you must continue to take care of him. + +BISHOP. It is not the cost of his living. He needs work. I can't +provide that. You could, if you would. + +PRESCOTT. Believe me, I would if I could. + +BISHOP. You understand that the salary ... + +PRESCOTT. James, I know that your son is a capable young man and I +would like to have him here with me. But I can't make a job for a +man when I have nothing for him to do. + +BISHOP. You, must, Stanley. I can afford to support him, but he +refuses to accept support from me any longer. + +PRESCOTT. Well? + +BISHOP. If you will give him a job, I will recompense you for his +salary. + +PRESCOTT. [_Shocked._] You can't mean that. + +BISHOP. I do mean it. + +PRESCOTT. I am surprised, James--that a man of your principles and +profession ... + +BISHOP. I am in a very grievous dilemma. + +PRESCOTT. I am sorry, but I can't do it. It is neither ethical nor +wise. + +BISHOP. I don't know whether it is wise or not. But I know my son +is desperate. I know I have got to do something. I can't see that +fine boy going about lost and unwanted, with no place in the world. +I can't see my son turning to Communism--and helping to pull down +not only your temples of money, but my House of God. + +PRESCOTT. I am very sorry. I can't do what you ask. + +BISHOP. If your plans go through, you would have a place for him? + +PRESCOTT. [_Impatiently._] Yes, yes. + +BISHOP. Then until they do--for my sake, Stanley. For old times' +sake. Because we were classmates. + +PRESCOTT. But it's damned unethical! Do you realize ... +[_Telephone rings._] Hello!--Oh, hello, dear ... Yes, I am just +leaving. I'll be there in a few minutes. [BISHOP _takes out +checkbook and writes._] I don't like this. + +BISHOP. The ethical sin will be wholly mine. You don't know what +it'll mean to my boy to be associated with your firm; you don't +know what it'll mean to the girl. He's been engaged to her for +three years. + +PRESCOTT. I don't like it. + +BISHOP. It means new life for two young people, life for them in +our way of life. This check, Stanley, is for twelve hundred +dollars. Pay Kenneth twenty-five dollars a week. When your plans go +through, pay him whatever he's worth to you. + +PRESCOTT. It's damned unethical. + +BISHOP. There is a greater righteousness than business ethics. +[_Protesting still_, PRESCOTT _takes the check._] Good-bye, +Stanley--God bless you. [BISHOP _goes._] + +[PRESCOTT _stands regarding check a moment, then rings,_ LUCILLE +_enters_.] + +PRESCOTT. Take a letter. Mr. Kenneth Holden. You have his address +on file. Dear Kenneth: Sometime ago you came in to inquire if I +could find a place for you. I am glad to tell you that there is a +vacancy here now, and if you are still looking for something the +place is yours. The work will be ... [_Pause._] to develop the +interesting plans you spoke to me about, pending possible use of +them in the future.... [_Pause._] The salary will be small to start +with, twenty-five dollars a week. Paragraph. You can begin work at +any time.... + +CURTAIN + + + + +ACT II + +_A few months later. The hour is dusk. A basement apartment lower +than street level. There are four doors, one leading in from the +street, one leading to a back yard, one to a kitchen, another to a +bedroom. The room is large and serves as a combined living room and +place of business for a dog specialist. Some of the furniture of +the old place is here. There is a shelf displaying packages of dog +biscuit, muzzles, etc. The walls are decorated with pictures of +dogs and glaring advertisements of dog goods, especially +insecticides. There is a large homemade sign_: + +_I CLIP, TRIM, PLUCK, WASH AND EXTERMINATE._ + +_At one side is Martin's sketching table, and on wall near it some +of his drawings._ + +TIPPY _is kneeling on the floor beside a wash-tub, bathing a +terrier. He talks to it gently, soothingly, all through following +scene._ + +MARTIN, _with a green eyeshade, is working on a sketch under a +table lamp._ + +_During scene_ TIPPY _takes dog out of tub and begins drying him +with a Turkish towel. Has large stack of clean folded towels +and uses one after the other_. + +MARTIN. [_As he sketches._] Your persistent love of Class of '29 +reunions seems to me more admirable than politic. + +TIPPY. It will go off all right if you refrain from talking +politics. + +MARTIN. As if I were the only member of the Unholy Six with a +capacity to make faux pas! + +TIPPY. You have tact and tolerance--when you choose to use them. + +MARTIN. Thanks. + +TIPPY. The fact that you and Ted still manage to live under the +same roof proves that. + +MARTIN. That poor devil would win the compassion of Hitler +himself--with three Jewish grandmothers! + +TIPPY. Well? If you can put up with Ted, who never did a lick of +work in his life, why quarrel with Ken who is now a true worker, +being duly exploited by a wicked capitalist? + +MARTIN. Who said I'd quarrel with him? + +TIPPY. You will. + +MARTIN. All right. You referee. + +TIPPY. If he high-hats you with his success I'll tell him that +you've sold a drawing to the _New Yorker_ and you can high-hat him +back. + +MARTIN. Lay off that _New Yorker_ stuff. + +TIPPY. Sensitive? + +MARTIN. Don't be an ass. It's unimportant, that's all. + +TIPPY. Eighty dollars--unimportant? + +MARTIN. [_Lays aside drawing, removes eyeshade and rises._] You've +got me wrong if you think I've any qualms about a reunion with our +blissfully-wed bourgeois comrades. Where I doubt your horse sense +is in inviting Kate. + +TIPPY. You can't ask a bride to attend a stag party with four men! + +MARTIN. I could have dug up some other female as a shock-absorber. + +TIPPY. Listen, son: a man can be a revolutionist and still mix +socially with the White Guard. But a female revolutionist must +either assassinate them or seduce them. + +MARTIN. [_Good-naturedly._] Go to hell. + +TIPPY. I invited Kate because she is Laura's friend. + +MARTIN. She was Laura's friend. + +TIPPY. Rats! + +MARTIN. In view of recent changes in social status, are you sure +that Kate is still on the calling list of Mr. and Mrs. Kenneth +Holden? + +TIPPY. You're talking awful rot. + +MARTIN. Maybe you know Ken better than I do. + +TIPPY. Hell, he isn't a prig. + +MARTIN. Another thing: What makes you so sure Ted will enjoy being +put on social display in his frayed clothes alongside a lady +gorgeously arrayed in the price of her shame? + +TIPPY. The very fact that Ted is so shabby will make it less +obvious that Kate is still--[_Pause._]--helping him. + +MARTIN. Kate is really showing remarkable restraint. I'd have +expected her to squeeze enough out of a mink coat to dress Ted up a +bit. + +[_All this time_ TIPPY _has been wiping dog with one towel after +another. He now gets up and leads dog to yard._] + +TIPPY. Now I must hang Itzy out to dry. + +MARTIN. God, haven't you dried that cur enough? + +TIPPY. Him must be ventilated so him will smell sweet. Him's mama +rubs her nose in him and her is very particular. [_He goes out with +dog_. MARTIN _begins picking up the strewn array of used towels_, +TIPPY _comes back._] Thanks, old man. [_Takes the towels._] Want to +dump the tub for me? [MARTIN _carries tub into kitchen,_ TIPPY +_continues cleaning up_. TED _enters with_ KATE. _She is richly +dressed and has the mink coat_, TED _has on a complete new outfit: +suit, hat shoes, topcoat. Everything. The coat is gray; suit +brown; hat gray. And there is a price tag on tail of overcoat._ +TIPPY _stares in astonishment._] Do my eyes deceive me? + +KATE. Hello, flea-killer.--How do you like it? + +TIPPY. I must have slept a few years. + +[TED _removes coat and lays it on table with hat._] + +KATE. Slept? + +TIPPY. It looks to me like the Republican Party is back in power. + +[MARTIN _re-enters. He stops in astonishment._] + +MARTIN. Hello. + +KATE. Hello, Communist. [_Indicates_ TED.] Does seeing Ted decently +dressed make you see red? + +MARTIN. [_Surveying_ TED'S _clothes._] No, indeed. The true +_Communist_ loves beauty and prosperity. His distinction is that he +insists on both for everybody. + +KATE. Well, I know you are prospering. I saw your drawing in the +_New Yorker_. + +MARTIN. I let them have it at half price just to get it where you +would see it. + +TIPPY. [_Confidentially to_ KATE.] Half price in the _New Yorker_ +would be triple price in the _New Masses._ But selling to the _New +Yorker_ is the latest orders from the Comintern. It's the new plan +for boring from within. + +KATE. [_Impressed._] Oh! Is it? + +TED. [_To_ MARTIN, _who is still surveying him._] Does it fit all +right? + +MARTIN. Perfectly. + +KATE. [_Indicating_ TED.] Honest, Tippy, what do you think of it? + +TIPPY. What should I think? What would anybody think? + +KATE. He looks nice, doesn't he? + +TED. [_Trying to seem nonchalant, although he is obviously trying +to justify himself._] I dropped by to remind Kate about the party. + +KATE. And I inveigled him into a shop. Isn't it worth it? +Transforms him. Ted wears clothes so well. + +TIPPY. Agreed. The man makes the clothes. Martin in that outfit +would look like an Oklahoma Indian who'd just struck oil. + +KATE. Ted hasn't any business to look shabby. It's all right for +Martin, but Ted just looks pathetic. + +MARTIN. The only reason I don't wear good clothes is because I +spill soup on them. + +KATE. [_Puts hat on_ TED'S _head._] Now, tell me, do you really +like the hat? + +TIPPY. It's O.K.--Is he to wear it in the house? + +TED. [_Removes hat_.] I feel the hat is not quite right. + +KATE. He wanted a brown hat. But _I_ thought gray was smarter. + +TED. Brown would have suited me better. + +MARTIN. I'm not up much on sartorial etiquette. Is the hat supposed +to match the coat or the suit? + +TED. There is no arbitrary rule about it. Brown is a better color +for me. + +TIPPY. [_Looks at watch._] If we're going to have any party, I'd +better clear up my work. I have a delivery to make now. [_Goes to +yard._] + +KATE. If you want to change the hat, darling, go ahead. The store's +open until seven. + +TED. Are you sure you wouldn't mind? + +TIPPY. [_Re-enters from yard, carrying small dog in his arms._] +Didn't realize it was getting so late. I'll be back as soon as I +can. [_He goes._] + +KATE. I think, Ted, that gray gives your face more life, [TED _puts +hat on again, and surveys himself before the mirror_, KATE _views +him in critical admiration, readjusts his hat several times, and +stands off to contemplate her man_. MARTIN _watches them both, then +inspired, takes pencil and cardboard and begins to sketch._] Brown +is unutterably drab. It does the most terrible things to me. Put it +a little more forward. There--_I_ think that's stunning, Ted. + +TED. This time of year the hat and coat would be seen together more +than the hat and suit. + +KATE. That's right.--Put the coat on again, [TED _puts coat on +again, and poses with both hat and coat before the mirror._] I +don't know. Perhaps you're right.--If you really want to change the +hat, go ahead. + +[_They continue posing_, KATE _angling the hat, etc., till_ MARTIN +_calls_ TED. _There has been a low knock._ MARTIN _turns his +sketch face down and opens the door. A middle-aged woman enters._] + +CASE WORKER. Does Theodore Brooks live here? + +MARTIN. Yes. + +[_She walks in._] + +CASE WORKER. Are you Mr. Brooks? + +MARTIN. No. + +CASE WORKER. Well, is he in? + +MARTIN. Yes. + +CASE WORKER. Please call him. + +MARTIN. Hi, Ted! [TED _turns and_ CASE WORKER _looks at him. He +shows no recognition and does not start over._] This lady is +calling on you. + +[TED _comes slowly, taking off his hat; he is still wearing the +coat._] + +CASE WORKER. [_Impatiently._] I asked to see Theodore Brooks. + +TED. Yes? + +CASE WORKER. You are not Brooks. + +TED. Yes. That's my name. + +CASE WORKER. Theodore Brooks?--You! + +TED. [_Uncomfortably._] What do you want, madam? + +CASE WORKER. I am a case worker on relief applications. + +TED. Oh! + +CASE WORKER. Someone giving the name of Theodore Brooks and this +address applied for relief. + +TED. Yes. + +CASE WORKER. Did _you_ make that application? + +TED. Yes. + +CASE WORKER. Why? + +TED. [_Squirming._] The usual reason--I suppose. + +[_There is a pause in which one expects almost anything to +happen._] + +CASE WORKER. [_With restraint._] Very well. I must ask you a few +questions. [_Her antagonism is felt all through._] + +TED. I'll try to answer them. [_Desperately._] I needed relief or I +wouldn't have applied for it. + +CASE WORKER. You feel you still need relief? + +TED. I do. + +CASE WORKER. Well ... Well, we'll go ahead. I have to fill my +records. Your name is Theodore Brooks. + +[_She sits at table to fill out blanks_, TED _stands._] + +TED. That's right. + +CASE WORKER. Age? + +TED. Twenty-eight. + +CASE WORKER. Where born? + +TED. New York City. + +CASE WORKER. When? + +TED. Twenty-eight years ago. + +CASE WORKER. No, no, the date! + +TED. March 20, 1907. + +CASE WORKER. Father's name? + +TED. Nathaniel Brooks. + +CASE WORKER. His birthplace? + +TED. New York City. + +CASE WORKER. His ancestry? + +TED. The Pilgrim fathers. + +CASE WORKER. Your mother's name? + +TED. Susan Cartwright, born in Philadelphia. Her ancestors, +American Quakers. + +CASE WORKER. [_Writing fast._] Wait a minute.--Both parents living? + +TED. Both dead. + +CASE WORKER. Brothers and sisters? + +TED. None. + +CASE WORKER. What other close kin? + +TED. I have one uncle and two aunts. + +CASE WORKER. Do they live in New York City? + +TED. It happens that none of them does. + +CASE WORKER. Then we don't need them. + +MARTIN. Pardon me, but how far in kinship does the responsibility +go? + +CASE WORKER. It depends. We can't force uncles and aunts to +contribute, but we sometimes give them the opportunity to do so. +However, this doesn't look like a kin folks case. And now, young +man, just what is your occupation? + +TED. I haven't any. That's my trouble. + +CASE WORKER. No occupation? You're not a minor. For adults +occupation must be stated. + +TED. Very well, I am a collector. + +CASE WORKER. By what firms have you been employed? + +TED. None. + +CASE WORKER. Then how can you be a collector? + +TED. You said I must have an occupation. + +CASE WORKER. You are not helping me by lying and you may get +yourself into trouble. + +MARTIN. Is it the first time you ever ran into a man, who needed +relief, not because he had worked, but because he hadn't? + +CASE WORKER. [_Snappily._] I didn't prepare those blanks, but I +have to fill them out. One can have an occupation, like +stenography, when trained for it, even though they have never been +employed. + +TED. All right, put that down and go ahead. + +CASE WORKER. Stenography? + +TED. No, collecting. + +CASE WORKER. But collectors aren't trained. One has to have worked +at that. + +TED. Then say I worked as a collector for my father. + +CASE WORKER. What business was he in? + +TED. He was retired. + +CASE WORKER. Then what did you collect for him? + +TED. First editions. + +CASE WORKER. Please talk sense. + +MARTIN. Books. A book collector. + +CASE WORKER. You mean, a bookkeeper? + +TED. [_Bitterly._] We kept them as long as we could. My father died +during the Wall Street panic. He'd gone bankrupt. Since you want to +know how I lived, I lived for some time by selling my father's +books. + +CASE WORKER. [_Writing._] Then you lived without working, on +property that you inherited? + +TED. Yes, till that source was exhausted. + +CASE WORKER. When was that? + +TED. Some time ago. + +CASE WORKER. You must be definite. + +TED. Then say two years ago. + +CASE WORKER. You sold _all_ your father's books? + +TED. I still have the family Bible, a set of Shakespeare with the +marginal notations made by father while he was at Oxford, and a few +others. + +CASE WORKER. How much do you consider those books worth? + +TED. I consider them invaluable. + +CASE WORKER. But you must set a value upon them. + +TED. Why? + +CASE WORKER. Because if you own anything worth two hundred dollars +you are not eligible for relief. + +TED. I have nothing worth that to anybody but me. + +CASE WORKER. You say you quit selling these books about two years +ago. + +TED. Yes. + +CASE WORKER. How have you lived since then? + +TED. Chiefly on borrowed money. + +CASE WORKER. From whom did you borrow the money? + +TED. From friends. + +CASE WORKER. You have very prosperous friends? + +TED. I had some prosperous friends. + +CASE WORKER. You are extremely well-dressed for an applicant for +relief. + +MARTIN. Let me explain that. We were to have a little dinner party +tonight ... + +CASE WORKER. And he bought a new outfit for this dinner.--Hasn't +even had time to remove the price tags.--Do you mind removing your +coat? + +TED. [_Takes it off_.] I was about to take it off. I'd just come +in. + +CASE WORKER. [_She rises and looks at maker's label in coat._] H'm. +Madison Avenue. [_Noses his suit at close range._] And the suit is +better than the coat.--This is the best I've run into yet. +Expensive suit and coat; new shoes; matched accessories. Not much +left of a hundred dollar bill, was there?--But I suppose your rich +uncle died _since_ you applied for relief? + +MARTIN. Look here, couldn't a man ... + +CASE WORKER. Certainly he could, and many do, apply for relief just +to get a little side graft from the government. + +TED. [_Desperately, humiliated._] I applied for relief because I +wanted a job; because the only way to get a job is to go on relief +first. I haven't anything. I have no source of income. + +CASE WORKER. [_Sarcastic._] No income, but plenty of money? I +understand! + +MARTIN. I was about to explain ... + +CASE WORKER. [_Shortly._] You needn't. You can't bamboozle me. It's +most unfortunate, isn't it, that I caught him unawares? Had he +known I was coming he'd undoubtedly have dressed more correctly for +the role of a relief applicant. + +KATE. Oh, how dare you? + +CASE WORKER. Our instructions are to report in detail on every +application, and particularly on those that appear fraudulent. +[_Fully formidable._] Now, Mr. Brooks. Will you answer truthfully? +Have you any means of support that you have not acknowledged? + +TED. No. I have not. + +CASE WORKER. [_Rising, leaves report lying on table._] Then perhaps +you will explain how you got those clothes? + +KATE. [_Who has had great difficulty keeping still._] I bought +those clothes for him. Now are you satisfied? + +CASE WORKER. And who are you? + +KATE. A friend. + +CASE WORKER. So--it's _that_ kind of a deal. I wondered who you +were. + +MARTIN. [_Angry._] Does that go in your report? + +CASE WORKER. Yes, that will go in my report. + +MARTIN. The lady's name and address, I suppose--and whether she is +married or single? + +CASE WORKER. You needn't be sarcastic. + +MARTIN. And if she is married, do you notify the husband? + +CASE WORKER. I don't think there is any ruling on that. + +[KATE, _unseen, gets hold of report and holds it behind her._] + +KATE. Well, what will happen in this case? + +CASE WORKER. I don't know. I shall turn in my report. + +KATE. Oh no you won't. Not _this_ report! [_She tears and crumples +it._]. + +CASE WORKER. How dare you? + +KATE. Get out! + +CASE WORKER. I'll report you. + +KATE. You haven't got my name and address yet. + +CASE WORKER. I'll send the chief investigator here. + +MARTIN. Madam, you will do nothing of the sort. Or I'll report you. + +CASE WORKER. You will? To whom? + +MARTIN. To a New York newspaper which would just love the story of +a noble case worker and how well she works her cases. + +CASE WORKER. The impudence! + +MARTIN. And your picture. I always illustrate my own stories, and I +can draw your face from memory. + +CASE WORKER. [_Whining._] But I must turn in some kind of a report. + +MARTIN. You lost it! And Uncle Sam forgot it. It's only one of ten +million. [_He escorts her to door._] + +CASE WORKER. [_As she storms out._] I ought to report the whole lot +of you to the police. + +KATE. [_As she further reduces the crumpled report to fragments and +tosses them into wastebasket._]. I don't know how I managed to keep +still as long as I did. I wanted to choke her. + +TED. I'm sorry I ever made the application. + +KATE. Why did you do it? + +TED. It was so long ago, I thought they'd forgotten it. + +MARTIN. Hang it, I shouldn't have lost my temper. I approve of +relief. You should be on relief, Ted--of course you should. + +TED. It was these clothes. + +MARTIN. That's tough luck. That angel of mercy should have seen you +yesterday. She would have adored that hole in your elbow. + +KATE. Did you really want to be on relief? + +TED. I need a job. The government will give one a job, but only if +he goes on relief first. + +MARTIN. That's it. First you go broke, then you go hungry. Then you +beg, then you take charity. Then you rake leaves--then the +taxpayers raise hell, and throw the rascals out to save the +Constitution. + +KATE. [_To_ MARTIN.] Does a man get work as soon as he gets on +relief? + +MARTIN. If he's a skilled worker, perhaps. But they can't invent +work fast enough. Many are still on straight relief. + +KATE. That woman was vile. How do people stand it? + +MARTIN. They stand it because an empty stomach growls louder than +insulted pride. + +KATE. We could report her. We could go over her head to some +responsible official. + +MARTIN. They have a rigid system to prevent that. + +KATE. No harm in trying. + +TED. No! I won't go near that place again. + +MARTIN. You're entitled to relief as much as anyone is. + +KATE. Yes, Ted. If you really want it.... + +TED. I don't want it. I don't even want to think about it. + +MARTIN. There are plenty of fine people on relief. After all, what +is relief? Relief is ... + +TED. Relief! Relief! Relief!--I don't want to hear that word again! +[_He starts to door._] + +KATE. Ted! Where are you going? + +TED. I am going to change my hat. [_He goes out._] + +KATE. I wish I knew what Ted really wants. + +MARTIN. Money. + +KATE. I've given him money. He hates me and he hates himself +because of it. + +MARTIN. Naturally. The transaction hasn't been according to Hoyle. +Now if Ted were a Georgian Prince, and your grandpa had started the +ten-cent stores, it would be a different matter. There'd be +grandeur in it; intrigue, romance, finance--something to write up +for the Sunday papers. But room rent and a suit of clothes ... +that's shoddy. It's got to be Rolls Royces and polo ponies or +nothing. + +KATE. Oh shut up. Do you think I like the situation? But I can't +see him starve. + +MARTIN. Damn that woman! If he could have got a job ... + +KATE. [_With sudden determination._] All right. If he wants a job, +I'll get him a job. + +MARTIN. How? + +KATE. By asking for it. How do you suppose? I'll go right now, +before I lose my nerve. [_She powders nose before pocket mirror_.'] + +MARTIN. You were smart to dress him up first. Those clothes should +spell the diff between wages and a salary. + +KATE. I'll take anything I can get for him. + +TIPPY. [_Enters._] Well, I'm back.... Where's our Beau Brummel? + +KATE. He went to change his hat. + +TIPPY. That's good. [_Crosses to yard._] Bet you never looked at +Itzy. [_Goes out to yard._] + +MARTIN. [_As_ KATE _puts on fur coat._] Funny time of day, Kate, to +start out to get a man a job. + +KATE. That depends on whom you have to see to get it. + +MARTIN. What's it to be? Bouncer at the Union League Club? + +TIPPY. [_Re-enters from yard._] 'Im still smells a eetle bit +soapy.--Kate! Where are you going? Ken and Laura will be here any +minute. + +KATE. Sorry, Tippy. I got my dates mixed. But I'll be back. Only +don't wait dinner for me. [_She goes._] + +TIPPY. Now what the hell? Where's she going? + +MARTIN. You can't tell. She works irregular hours. + +TIPPY. But she promised to be here for dinner. Isn't her soul her +own? + +MARTIN. Hadn't you heard she'd sold it? + +TIPPY. [_Glumly._] That's a hell of a note.--I hope Ted gets back +in time. I don't want my dinner party spoiled. + +MARTIN. He'll be back. + +TIPPY. He looked nifty in the new clothes, didn't he? Laura will +like them. + +MARTIN. Let's hope she doesn't say too much about them. + +TIPPY. She'll be too busy telling you what a fine husband she has. + +MARTIN. And her husband will tell me what a fine job he has, and +all about the sweet spirit of loyalty that exists in that wonderful +corporation. [_Stops to light cigarette._] Jesus, Tippy, if +prosperity really does come back, life is going to be an awful bore +for us revolutionists. + +[_There is a knock_, TIPPY _goes and lets_ KEN _and_ LAURA _in. +They are happy and gay and terribly in love. She can hardly keep +her hands from caressing him. She finds threads to flick off his +sleeve and must straighten his tie._] + +LAURA. [_Embracing_ TIPPY.] YOU dear! + +KEN. Hello--hello. + +LAURA. Hello, Martin,--you still a Communist? + +MARTIN. And how! + +LAURA. [_To_ TIPPY.] Are Kate and Ted going to be here too? + +TIPPY. You bet! + +LAURA. Oh, how grand! It's going to be like old times. + +KEN. [_Tolerantly._] For anyone who so hated those times, Laura, I +must say ... + +LAURA. [_Positively._] They were good times.--Except that you +wouldn't have me. + +KEN. I was an idiot. + +LAURA. Such a charming idiot. + +MARTIN. Looks as if you maybe like that fellow. + +LAURA. Mm. A little bit. + +KEN. She won't admit it, but she likes me a lot. + +MARTIN. I'll be hanged if I see why. + +LAURA. It's a mystery to me, too. + +TIPPY. And after all this time! + +LAURA. It's queer, isn't it? Often I look at him and I say why, out +of all the millions of men--handsome men, brilliant men, wealthy +men--did I fall in love with him? + +MARTIN. And when you might have had me! + +TIPPY. [_With a terrible yowl._] Oh, sweet mystery of life ... + +KEN. My God! + +TIPPY. I won't even ask how things are! You look so damned all +right. + +LAURA. On two salaries and no babies, who wouldn't? May I lend you +the price of a rented Tuxedo so you can come to dinner without +embarrassing our butler? + +KEN. Yeah--when we get the bedroom set paid for we're going to +exchange the radio for a Cadillac. + +LAURA. Oh, Martin! If you have any original drawings unsold, just +name your price. All we have on the walls now is the Horse Fair and +the Last Supper. But mind you--art only, no propaganda. + +MARTIN. I'll do a charcoal of the Palisades for you. + +LAURA. I forbid it. They're an invitation to suicide. + +TIPPY. He'll draw the Palisades from the bottom looking up. That's +an invitation to climb. + +KEN. There's a lot in the point of view! + +LAURA. Good! Climbing is much more fun than jumping off! + +KEN. All one needs is a toehold to get started. + +TIPPY. I say, Ken, so you feel really started now? + +KEN. I sure do. + +TIPPY. That's great! + +MARTIN. When you get to the top, don't push anyone off. + +TIPPY. There is plenty of room on top of the Palisades. + +MARTIN. You've stacked the analogy on me. Most mountains don't have +flat tops. + +KEN. Ah, hell, Martin, you're just being stubborn. Kate showed us +your drawing in the _New Yorker_. + +LAURA. We liked it a lot. + +KEN. That's your toehold. When you've sold them six you'll be back +to pink socialism. And soon you'll be mailing things to the +_Saturday Evening Post_--and signing them! + +LAURA. Don't rub it in, dear. + +KEN. I'm not rubbing it in. I was once as radical as Martin. + +TIPPY. Ken, Ken--don't exaggerate. As an architect, you must keep +your perspective. + +KEN. I was ready to go to Russia, wasn't I? + +MARTIN. Oh yeah! + +KEN. I used to get sore as a pup when people said a man was radical +only because he was unemployed. But it's true. I know because I've +lived through it. A man's political views are colored by his +situation. + +MARTIN. [_Shouting with laughter._] Hey! Don't plagiarize Marx. + +KEN, Marx? + +MARTIN. Karl Marx; you're stealing his thunder. That's what the man +wrote his big book about. Only--you see it for one man and a few +months. Marx saw it for all humanity for all time. + +LAURA. They're at it again. The dear little schoolboys.--Tippy, how +does one make them grow up? + +TIPPY. Opinions differ. Bobby Benson says Mother's Oats and Buck +Rogers says Cocomalt. What do you give Ken for breakfast? + +KEN. I say, what's Ted doing? + +TIPPY. About the same. + +KEN. Still looking for book bargains? + +TIPPY. They get harder and harder to sell. + +KEN. The trouble with you fellows is you encourage Ted in his +weakness. Someone ought to put it to him straight. The man doesn't +realize where he's drifting. + +MARTIN. Yes--well--that's his business. + +KEN. You fellows are afraid to talk to him. + +LAURA. What is there to say to him? + +KEN. Say to him? Say to him that the least he could do is to apply +for relief work. + +MARTIN. [_Pointedly._] Ken, you're welcome to your opinion. But I'd +advise you not to say anything to Ted about relief. + +KEN. Why not? There's no disgrace in relief work. You'd be +surprised how many ... + +MARTIN. [_Shortly._] We know as many nice people on relief as you +do. + +KEN. I said relief work, not relief. + +MARTIN. What's the difference? + +LAURA. Why, Martin, there's a big difference! + +MARTIN. Sure there is. Plain reliefers can sit on the benches. +Relief workers have shovels to lean on. It's a true class +distinction. + +KEN. There are lots of loafers and piddling projects,--but the +government's also doing some big jobs, some real construction work. + +TIPPY. Martin wrote a song about that. + +LAURA. Really? Have you turned composer, Martin? + +MARTIN. Just some new words on an old tune. + +LAURA. Oh, let's hear it. + +MARTIN. After dinner. + +LAURA. No, I can't wait. You sing it for us now, then after dinner +we can all sing it. [_She picks up guitar and thrusts it at him_.] +Come on, Lyric Writer, tune up. + +KEN. [_Tolerantly._] Sure let's hear it. + +MARTIN. [_Singing._] + Then little Andy Lang of the Lake Shore gang + Said, "Boys, you know I'm countin' + Each day and week until I see + +ALL. The Big Rock Candy Mountain." + +MARTIN. Oh the Big Rock Candy Mountain + Stands on a plain of bread. + Our Uncle's got to feed us + Or soon we'll all be dead. + The more and more he feeds us + The sooner we'll be red + So serve the soup + With a great big whoop + And promise pie + Up in the sky + On the Big Rock Candy Mountain. + +ALL. Oh the Big Rock Candy Mountain + +MARTIN. Belongs to Uncle Sam. + To move the great big mountain + Will take a million men. + So come on with your tooth picks + And bring your fountain pen. + Go easy, don't jerk; + We gotta make work. + It'll take more moons + If we use small spoons + To move that great big mountain. + +[_On the last verse_ TIPPY _has gone to yard and he is +now back with Itzy on a leash._] + +TIPPY. On with the concert while I take Itzy home. I won't be long. +Itzy lives near. + +MARTIN. Say, let me take Itzy home while you start dinner. + +TIPPY. Right you are. I forgot a dinner has to be cooked before it +can be eaten. + +MARTIN. Any shopping to do? + +TIPPY. Oh, that's right. I'll have to go myself. + +KEN. He also forgot a dinner has to be bought before it can be +cooked. + +LAURA. Something tells me I'd better look into this menu. + +TIPPY. I'm having tomato soup, and I'm going to make bran muffins. +And there are pork chops. + +LAURA. Pork chops in 1935! That's extravagant. + +MARTIN. He buys them to get the bones for his doggies. The meat we +get is a by-product. + +LAURA. O. K. Ken adores shoulder chops.--But what's the salad? + +TIPPY. That's just where I stalled. I haven't even bought the +makings. + +KEN. [_Taking Itzy's leash._] If you people are going to talk +salad, tell me where this dog lives. + +LAURA. No. I see I'll have to go. No salad has been provided and I +don't trust men on salad. Martin, you know where Itzy lives, so +come along and carry the packages. And Tippy, you go light your +oven and mix your muffins. + +[LAURA _and_ MARTIN _go with the dog._] + +TIPPY. Laura's a peach. + +KEN. You don't know how much of a peach. + +TIPPY. I'm glad you two've got settled so well. + +KEN. I was a fool not to do it before. + +TIPPY. Sure you were. + +KEN. The trouble was, I'd lost my bearings. Thought I'd never get +out of the woods. + +TIPPY. The job look pretty good? + +KEN. I guess so. + +TIPPY. You don't sound so sure. + +KEN. Oh sure, the job's all right. + +TIPPY. Prescott a tough customer? + +KEN. No. That's just the trouble. He's a queer duck. Half the time +I feel he doesn't know I'm there. + +TIPPY. He hired you, didn't he? He pays you, doesn't he? He knows +you're there! + +KEN. Of course he isn't ready to use my stuff yet. Just wants me to +work it up. + +TIPPY. Sure. That's what he hired you for. + +KEN. But, damn it, I've been there several months and ... +[_Laughs._] Maybe the trouble is that I don't have to take orders +from anybody; maybe it's that I don't have to fuss and sweat over +details the way the others do. Maybe that's the trouble. I can work +on my plans in my own sweet way. Maybe that's it. Maybe I'm unhappy +because Prescott doesn't bawl hell out of me the way he does the +others. + +TIPPY. That's it. The trouble is you've got it too good! + +KEN. That's right. Maybe I've got it too good, [TED _enters. Now +has new hat, brown; better taste, better fit, and more becoming. He +and_ KEN _greet each other with a little restraint._] Hello, Ted. + +TED. Hello. You look fine. Married life must agree with you. + +KEN. Nothing like it. Married life, _and work_. + +TED. Oh yes, work. You do have a job, haven't you? + +KEN. Yes, you bet I have. + +TED. And a job's a job, even if it falls from the moon. + +TIPPY. The moon? Are there capitalists on the moon? + +TED. Do all jobs come from capitalists? + +TIPPY. Don't they? + +TED. Ask Martin. He says there are no capitalists in Russia but +lots of jobs. + +KEN. God, are you going Red, Ted? + +TIPPY. Ted's not going anywhere, but I'm going to the kitchen to +start the muffins. The rest of the dinner is on the way, Ted. So +lick your chops for a feast. + +[_He goes. There is an awkward pause, during which_ TED +_self-consciously removes his coat under_ KEN'S _curious eyes._] + +KEN. Nice outfit. + +TED. Glad you like it.--Going to be like old times. Regular reunion +of the Class of '29. + +KEN. Yes. + +[_Pause._] + +TED. Where's Laura? + +KEN. She's gone out to do some shopping. + +TED. Oh. With Kate? + +KEN. No. Kate wasn't here. + +TED. She was here before. + +KEN. She wasn't when we came. + +TED. Oh! + +KEN. Laura went with Martin. + +TED. Shopping? + +KEN. That's right. + +[_Pause._] + +TED. Great to have the whole bunch together again, huh? + +KEN. Yes, great. + +[_Pause._] + +TED. You seem satisfied with your job. + +KEN. Hell yes. It's a great job. The salary isn't anything to boast +of--yet. But the future looks like a million. You see, Prescott +didn't hire me for any routine detail. He has men for that. His +object in taking me on was to develop for him my plans for +fabricated housing. + +TED. Sounds fine. + +KEN. Christ, Ted, do you realize what it means, after you've wasted +years, to get back and do _real_ work? + +TED. Must feel _great_. + +KEN. Ted, why don't you get a job? + +TED. I haven't turned down any. + +KEN. But have you been going about it in the right way? Of course I +realize you haven't any real professional training. But you know +the rare books racket. There must be a lot of money in publishing +limited editions. What's wrong with that business? + +TED. Unfortunately, the people I know don't consider me a business +man. + +KEN. What you are and how you're considered isn't important. It's +the way you go after things.--The trouble with you is you got +started down and just kept on going down.--Oh, I know how that is. +It looked that way for me once. Things were awful. + +TED. They've changed for you, haven't they? + +KEN. Sure. They've changed for everybody. The whole spirit of the +country has changed. Man, don't you feel it? + +TED. I can't say that I do. + +KEN. We've turned that famous corner, and it's time for you to wake +up and get out of your rut. + +TED. All right. You know how. Suppose you tell me. + +KEN. You still think there's something wrong with the world when +your troubles are purely personal. + +TED. My troubles are ... All right. What about the other millions +of unemployed? + +KEN. They're incompetents. Common laborers and workmen in +industries that died--like soft coal mining. And maybe some +technological unemployment. But you're not in any narrow technical +field. As a matter of fact in not being specialized you actually +have an advantage. All you've got to do is go after things. + +TED. Easy to say. + +KEN. Easy to do. Part of your trouble is your environment. + +TED. My environment? + +KEN. Sure. Tippy here is make-shifting--but that's all right. It's +something. Martin's radical, living off his wits. That's not your +style. Neither of them can help you. + +TED. They have helped me. + +KEN. They've weakened you. For Christ's sake, Ted, snap out of it. +Get away from here. Get away from it all. Make a break. You won't +starve. If you can't get a real job, go on relief. + +TED. Relief! + +KEN. I know relief isn't pleasant for a man like you. But hell, +it's better than ... + +TED. Let's not discuss it. + +KEN. It's high time you did discuss it. You can't go on the way +you're doing. + +TED. Did I ask for your advice? + +KEN. Now don't get sore. I'm trying to help you. + +TED. The hell with your help! + +KEN. All right. You don't want advice and you won't take it. What +are you going to do? Go on living off Kate forever? + +TED. That's my affair. + +KEN. It's your affair, but everybody knows it. And everybody knows +what it is. It's the second oldest profession in the world--and the +lousiest one. + +TED. [_Wildly._] Drop it, I say! + +KEN. You know where Kate gets her money and how she earns it.--And +you know what that makes you. + +[_With an inarticulate cry_, TED _tries to stop him, but_ KEN +_goes on almost in spite of himself_'.] A pimp! That's what it +makes you. A pimp. + +TED. Damn you! Damn you! + +KEN. It doesn't sound pretty, does it? + +TED. Not from you. + +KEN. It will sound the same no matter where it comes from. + +TED. Not from you.--Because we're in the same boat. We're in the +same boat, do you hear? We're in the same boat! + +KEN. [_Contemptuously._] The hell you say! + +TED. You'd rather die than accept favors from a woman, wouldn't +you? + +KEN. You bet you ... + +TED. You'd rather eat Salvation Army bean soup than go on living +off your father, too. + +KEN. Sure. So I got out and got a job. + +TED. A job. What kind of a job? [_Hysterically._] Who got that job +for you? Who is paying your salary? + +KEN. Ah, you're crazy! + +TED. I'll tell you who got you that job and I'll tell you who's +paying your salary. Your father. + +KEN, You're a god-damned liar. + +[MARTIN _and_ LAURA _enter, their arms laden with bundles._] + +TED. Prescott is just a go-between. It's your father who's paying +your salary! + +LAURA. [_In horror._] Ted! + +TED. Ask her. She knows. It was her idea.--If I'm a pimp, what does +that make you? [_Takes his hat and coat, brushes by her and streaks +out._] + +KEN. [_Unconvincingly._] He's crazy. He's--crazy. + +[_Silence,_ LAURA _leans against the table, as though she had +difficulty in breathing_, TIPPY _enters, apron on, egg beater in +hand._] + +TIPPY. Hello. You back? [_Takes groceries._] What's up? [_No +answer._] Where's Ted? [_No answer._] + +KEN. [_To_ LAURA.] What are you whimpering about? [_Seizes her by +the arms._] It's true. What he said was true, wasn't it? [_She +tries to speak, but cannot._] Who got my job for me? Who is paying +my salary? Answer me! + +LAURA. Your father. + +KEN. My father! How could he do such a thing? + +LAURA. It was my idea. I--I told him to do it. + +KEN. You. You did that to me. + +LAURA. I wanted to help you. + +KEN. It takes a woman to do a thing like that. + +LAURA. I loved you. + +KEN. It takes love.--That's what love is. [_He goes to door._] +That's what it does to a man. [_Pause. The room is deathly quiet._] +And when I was a boy I used to wonder why some of the world's +wisest men hung out with whores. + +CURTAIN + + + + +ACT III + + +_Same. Several hours later, about 10 P. M._ TED _is sitting in a +corner with a book, but unable to concentrate. He is wretchedly +unhappy and jumpy._ + +LAURA _paces back and forth._ + +MARTIN _sits at a table with a pencil, sketching, evidently +using_ TED, _whose face is exposed to him in profile, as a model._ + +_There is an air of tense, long waiting. Little is said, and then +spoken in quick and jerky tempo, with long pauses_. + +LAURA. If I only knew where he was. + +MARTIN. He's best alone, wherever he is--until he gets ready to +come home. + +[_Silence._] + +LAURA. If I knew he was all right! + +MARTIN. He's all right. + +[_Silence,_ LAURA _sits down apart from the others_, TED _rises and +crosses to her. She does not look at him. He speaks haltingly._] + +TED. Laura. Is there anything I can do? I am very sorry, very sorry +it happened. + +LAURA. [_Without looking up._] What good does that do now? You did +it. + +TED. Yes, I did it. To say that he provoked me till I was crazed +with shame and anger does not undo it. That is true. + +LAURA. All right, it's true. What he told you about yourself you +already knew. Everybody knew it. It was nothing but words and made +no real difference in your life. But you told him something about +himself that makes all the difference in the world--and has ruined +his life and mine. [_She rises._] + +TED. I admit all that. + +LAURA. [_Near hysteria._] Well, then, shut up! [_To escape from him +she goes into kitchen._] + +MARTIN. [_Dryly, as he shades drawing._] The lady, it seems, would +have been quite satisfied if you had merely called her husband a +traitor to his country, a robber of blind widows, a bombastic +egotist, a thieving son-of-a-'bitch and a cock-eyed liar. + +TED. [_Humorlessly._] It wasn't what I called him. It was what I +told him. + +MARTIN. Precisely. The greater the truth the greater the libel. Ken +Holden, you see, wanted to be an adult lion among the little +monkeys, and you informed him that he was still an infant drawing +sustenance from parental sources. + +TED. [_Sensing_ MARTIN'S _friendliness approaches him like a +friendless dog._] You understand, don't you, how he provoked me? + +MARTIN. Perfectly. + +TED. [_Sees sketch._] Why, that's me you're drawing! + +MARTIN. Glad you recognized it. Some people don't recognize +themselves in profile. + +TED. It's a good profile. The face is good.--But why the uniform? + +MARTIN. Clothes make the man. I wanted to see if a uniform would +make a soldier. + +TED. I never wore a uniform. I detest them. I'd rather be shot than +wear one. + +MARTIN. That's an old Spanish custom. + +TED. Spanish? + +MARTIN. Custom. To shoot men who do not like to wear uniforms. + +TED. But why do you draw me as a soldier? What did I do to suggest +that? What made you do it? + +MARTIN. Something in Kate's eyes, while you were posing for her, +suggested it. She seemed to think your outfit lacked something. +Well, what it lacked I have seen on parade grounds at West Point. +There it is. [_Holds up drawing._] + +TED. [_Backs away._] Why do you torment me? + +MARTIN. I'm sorry. [_He rips cardboard across and throws the halves +into wastebasket._] It had no significance to you personally, +Ted.--It's all of us. All of us who are in the army. + +TED. In the army? What are you talking about? We aren't in any +army. We wouldn't go in. Why, half the men you meet say that in a +war they'd be conscientious objectors. The jails wouldn't hold +them. + +MARTIN. But the ditches will. + +TED. But I tell you ... + +MARTIN. They jailed conscientious objectors in the last war. This +time they will shoot them. + +TED. Why are you Communists so afraid of war? + +MARTIN. We know what starts it.--It's the army, Ted, that makes +war. + +TED. But this country hasn't a big standing army. + +MARTIN. There are ten millions in it. + +TED. You mean the unemployed? + +MARTIN. That's the army that makes war these days. + +TED. You radicals always say that. I don't agree with you--except +about war. I think you are right about that. + +MARTIN. Which is why the American Legion wants to exterminate us. + +TED. They want war. But you want revolution. You are against war +and for revolution. That's silly. Just a different kind of war. +You're both wrong. There's no sense in any of you. + +MARTIN. That's right. The business men have all the sense. They +know that an army in rags is more dangerous to them than an army in +uniform. So we will wear uniforms. I just tried yours on to see how +it would fit you. + +TED. [_Picks up the two halves out of basket and puts them together +and stares at it._] No.--No. I'll never wear one. Never! [_He +crumples drawing and throws it back into basket_, LAURA _comes in +from the kitchen._ TED, _looking for escape, goes into bedroom._] + +LAURA. Tippy hasn't telephoned. That means he hasn't found Ken. + +MARTIN. Maybe he wants to march the grand monarch in on us. + +LAURA. Oh, I hope so.--He ought to be back.... Martin, do you think +Ken will ever forgive me? + +MARTIN. Well, you know what Solomon said about the way of a man +with a maid. + +LAURA. Don't wise-crack. + +MARTIN. I'm only hiding my ignorance behind Solomon's. + +LAURA. Do you think Ken _should_ forgive me? + +MARTIN. I think he ought to spank you till you'd have to eat off +the mantel for a week, and then take you back to his bed and board +and forget it. + +LAURA. If he only would. + +TIPPY. [_Enters, looking gloomy._] He hasn't been at the apartment, +Laura.--He hasn't been there and he hasn't 'phoned there. + +MARTIN. So that's that. + +TIPPY. There were some messages for him. The girl at the +switchboard said a man's voice asked for Ken and then asked for +you. Called a couple of times. Left no name. + +LAURA. Maybe I ought to go home? + +TIPPY. Would you be any more miserable alone? + +LAURA. I couldn't be. + +TIPPY. You stay here a while. I gave the girl this address and +number and told her to give it to anyone who called. I also made +her promise that if Ken came in she'd call you here at once. + +LAURA. She'll die of curiosity. + +TIPPY. Telephone operators develop immunity. + +LAURA. You're a dear. Thanks.--But--what shall we do? + +TIPPY. There is nothing more we can do until you're ready to notify +the Missing Persons Bureau. + +LAURA. Do you think we ought to? + +TIPPY. No.--I hate to seem callous to your distress, dear, but +involving the police department at this moment would be a little +premature. + +LAURA. But I'm so worried. He might do anything, Tippy. + +TIPPY. The chances are he'll do nothing but take a walk. + +LAURA. If I only knew ... + +TIPPY. And what could you tell the police? Man quarrelled with +wife, left house, has been gone four hours.... + +LAURA. It seems dreadful, dreadful--just to sit here and not know +anything. + +MARTIN. I think I have a hunch. + +LAURA. Oh, Martin! Why didn't you say so before? + +MARTIN. I only just got the hunch. + +LAURA. What? Where? + +MARTIN. Now wait a minute. It's only a hunch, and my hunches aren't +so hot. I don't believe in them, you see. + +LAURA. But you'll go, won't you? You'll go? + +MARTIN. Oh, sure. [_Gets hat._] You stay here with Tippy. + +LAURA. [_Grabbing her things._] No. I want to go with you. + +MARTIN. Please don't, Laura. I don't know where Ken is. It's just a +mere possibility; an old dump I used to take him to. You stay here. +[_He goes. Just as he closes door_ TED _walks into room._] + +TED. Hello, Tippy. You back? [LAURA _gives one look at_ TED, +_grasps wrap and runs out._] She hates me. + +TIPPY. Well, there's nothing to do about it, except keep out of her +way. + +TED. I shouldn't have come back. + +TIPPY. Why not? You live here. + +TED. Then why does she stay? + +TIPPY. Because she doesn't want to be alone with her thoughts. + +TED. You think she feels guilty, too? + +TIPPY. Well, what do you think? She tricked Ken into continuing the +thing he'd come to hate most in the world; financial dependence on +his father. She took a big chance, and lost. + +TED. It was my fault. I told. I never would have told if he hadn't ... + +TIPPY. Never mind. We know what Ken did to you. It was in his +nature to do just that.--His nature was part of the thing Laura +took a chance on too,--and lost. + +TED. [_After slight pause._] I suppose it's always hard to +understand the other fellow's troubles. They seem so small compared +with your own. + +TIPPY. Circumstances do not excuse crimes, but they do explain +them. [_Pause._] We've all taken plenty. But I'll say this, old +man. If I'm the first member of the Class of '29 to check in at +the big Court House I'll look up the judge and I'll say to him, +"See here, God, when Ted Brooks arrives, don't judge him till you've +looked up his full record. The cards were stacked against that guy +from the start! The rest of us merely needed jobs, but he needed ..." +[_Pauses, not knowing how to finish._] + +TED. Thanks, Tippy. + +TIPPY. I'll be damned if I know what you do need! + +TED. Guts. Guts is what I need.--My health's good enough for +physical labor, but nobody wants me to dig ditches. + +TIPPY. Did you ever see a steam shovel at work? I don't say you're +any use to the world or have any right to live in it. But making a +hundred men like you substitute for a steam shovel is plain damn +silly. It's an insult to the steam shovel. + +TED. [_With deep, quiet desperation which grows more and more +intense through the following scenes._] What should I do? What was +it intended for me to do? + +TIPPY. Live like an aristocrat. + +TED. As Martin would say--on the backs of the workers. + +TIPPY. The workers don't seem to mind. They didn't throw you off. + +TED. No, but who did? + +TIPPY. The other guys on the backs of the workers. + +TED. No one in particular threw me off. + +TIPPY. Then maybe you just fell off. The worker's back is broad, +but it's not broad enough to accommodate all of us. + +TED. But you're not a revolutionist? + +TIPPY. Hell, no. I'm a dog washer. + +[KATE _enters_, _excited, out of breath._] + +KATE. Ted--guess what! I've got a job for you! + +TED. [_Not believing._] A job? For me? + +TIPPY. You mean that? + +KATE. I do. It's nothing to brag about, but it's a job. + +TIPPY. Private industry or relief? + +KATE. [_Indignantly._] Relief? Certainly not. It's real work. + +TIPPY. With real money--that's great. + +KATE. Oh, it's nothing fancy; but it'll pay enough for Ted to live +better than he has been living. + +[TED _doesn't grow enthusiastic, and_ KATE _becomes resentful. +Sensing this_, TIPPY _keeps up the badinage._] + +TIPPY. How many questions will you give me to name the job? + +KATE. Oh, you'd never guess it. + +TIPPY. Come on, Ted, we'll alternate and spot it in ten questions. +I'm first. Is it indoors or out? + +KATE. In. + +[_They wait for TED's question._] + +TED. [_Dully._] Is it working on commission? + +KATE. [_Triumphantly._] No. Regular wages. + +TIPPY. Is the wage above or below $25.00 a week? + +KATE. It's a little below. + +TED. Is it in an office? + +KATE. No. + +TIPPY. Would he wear a white collar at work? + +KATE. Yes. + +TIPPY. Hey, Ted, use your head. That's five questions gone. + +TED. Do I have to sell anything? + +KATE. No. + +TIPPY. Indoors. No office. Low wages. White collar. No selling. +[_Thinking._] Does he work with his hands or his head--or his +mouth? + +KATE. His hands and his mouth. + +TIPPY. But not his head. That's illuminating. + +TED. How did you get this job? + +KATE. I got it the only way you can get jobs for anybody these +days--by asking it as a favor from someone who had it to give. + +TED. I see. + +KATE. [_Resentful._] You don't seem very appreciative. + +TIPPY. Wait a minute, Kate. He doesn't know yet what the job is. + +KATE. He doesn't act as if he wanted to know. + +TIPPY. Don't get sensitive.--And I haven't played my game out. + +KATE. All right. Go on. + +TIPPY. [_Thinks a moment, then brilliantly._] Will he wear a +uniform? + +KATE. Yes.--You guessed it. [TED _grows dismayed._] The job is +elevator operator in the Graybar Building. It's a cinch. You don't +even have to stop the car. You just push buttons. + +TIPPY. Automatic. All but the phonograph. And you're it. + +TED. In uniform! + +KATE. [_Impatiently._] Well, what of it? + +TED. And push buttons.... Floor, please. Two please. Five please. +Right please. [_Laughs harshly._] + +KATE. Oh, so it isn't good enough for you! + +TED. Fifteen please. Twenty-six please. + +KATE. Well, what do you want? Vice-president in a bank? Wake up! +This isn't 1929. This is 1935. You take what you get and are +grateful. + +TED. Like a bellboy!-- + +KATE. It's a job. You said you wanted a job. + +TED. Oh God, Kate ... + +KATE. It pays more than I got for years. And I supported myself on +it and you, too. + +TED. Listen, Kate ... [_Has some difficulty going on._] If it were +an old freight elevator in a warehouse, and I could wear overalls, +and pull on a rope that blistered my hands ... + +KATE. It's the uniform that stalls you, is it?--Now I see why they +make soldiers wear them. + +TIPPY. [_Wishing to save the situation._] The British started that +with their Red Coats, to make them better targets so we could win +the Revolutionary War.--I learned that in school. + +KATE. [_Bitter._] You got it wrong, brother. It's to take the +conceit out of a coward by making him realize he's no better than +anybody else. That's what it's for! + +TED. Kate ... + +KATE. You said you wanted a job. I believed you. I asked for a job; +any kind of a job that a man who had never worked could do. And I +got one. [_To_ TIPPY.] But he doesn't want it. It's not because of +the uniform. It's because it's _a job!_ [_She has turned her back +on_ TED. _He quietly takes his new hat and coat and sneaks out. She +turns as she hears the door._] He's gone. [_Pause._] I never talked +like that to him before. [_With sudden fright._] Where's he +going?--Ted! Ted! [_She runs out after him._] + +[TIPPY _follows to the door which she leaves open. An elderly, +richly-dressed spinster, whom_ KATE _has nearly knocked down as she +fled, stalks into the room. She glowers at_ TIPPY.] + +MISS DONOVAN. So that's the kind of a place this is! [_She stalks +about and glares at everything._] + +TIPPY. [_Closing door._] Good evening, Miss Donovan. + +MISS DONOVAN. Irresponsible people! Wild and irresponsible people! +To think that I trusted Itzy to wild, irresponsible people. + +TIPPY. My dear Miss Donovan, the distresses of my personal guests +have nothing to do with my professional work. + +MISS DONOVAN. Guests! Was it your guests who brought Itzy home? + +TIPPY. Surely there is nothing wrong with Itzy? + +MISS DONOVAN. Nothing wrong! [_Portentously._] Itzy is sneezing! He +has a cold! + +TIPPY. He was all right when he left here. + +MISS DONOVAN. Dr. Sayre, I told you never to let any person but +yourself touch that dog when he was out of my apartment. + +TIPPY. But it's a very short distance and the man who took him home ... + +MISS DONOVAN. The man you say! My maid said it was a silly boy and +a giggling, irresponsible girl. How do I know what they did to +Itzy? How do I know where they took him? Or in what company they +had him? They might have let him get into a fight and get killed. + +TIPPY. But they didn't. + +MISS DONOVAN. They, or you, exposed Itzy to a chill. Itzy is +sneezing. Itzy has a cold. Itzy may develop pneumonia and die. +[_During this speech there is a knock and_ TIPPY _goes to door and +lets in the_ BISHOP _while_ MISS DONOVAN _continues._] I shall hold +you responsible. If anything happens to Itzy, you alone are to +blame. I shall hold you responsible for Itzy's death. [_She +addresses the_ BISHOP.] If you are a customer of this man, let me +warn you. He is not to be trusted. He is not responsible. + +BISHOP. There must be some misunderstanding. + +MISS DONOVAN. There is no misunderstanding. I brought Itzy here on +a friend's recommendation. She said it was a responsible place. It +is not. It is full of wild, irresponsible people. + +BISHOP. Madam, I am sure ... + +MISS DONOVAN. You look like a man who loves animals. If you do, do +not bring them here. This man deliberately exposed my poor Itzy to +a cold. He may die. + +BISHOP. Itzy is your dog, I presume? + +MISS DONOVAN. And such a darling. Everybody loves him. I shall tell +everyone--all my friends. He suffers so--I shall warn them. His +nose is running.... I shall destroy this irresponsible man's +business!--If you could look into his eyes you'd understand! ... If +you love dogs, never trust them to irresponsible people. [_She goes +to the door and out._] + +BISHOP. That woman is a fool. + +TIPPY. Some of my best customers are, Bishop. + +MISS DONOVAN. [_Opens door and sticks her head in._] I shall ruin +your business! [_Closes door with a slam._] + +TIPPY. Jesus! [_Takes the_ BISHOP'S _hat and coat._] Won't you be +seated, sir? + +BISHOP. I trust that lady is not as influential as she feels. + +TIPPY. Dog lovers are gossips. But I get business by gossip as well +as lose it. By gossip, sir, and perfumed soap. The art of perfuming +dogs has a great future. It's an undeveloped field. I'm just +beginning to explore it. + +BISHOP. You are a marvelous young man, Timothy. + +TIPPY. It's the Irish in me--also the Scotch. + +BISHOP. I wish--I wish my son were more like you.--Have you seen +him, Timothy? + +TIPPY. [_Evasively._] Why, yes sir--earlier this evening. + +BISHOP. I called at his apartment and was told to come here. + +TIPPY. Well, yes--he was here. So was Laura. [BISHOP _sighs +heavily._] + +BISHOP. You have a nice place here.--And your business? + +TIPPY. I don't complain. Only the customers do, as you heard, sir. + +BISHOP. I could see that woman was a fool. + +TIPPY. I would not dispute you. + +BISHOP. But surely not all people who own dogs are fools. + +TIPPY. There are exceptions. + +BISHOP. At least you are busy. You are occupied and happy. You have +found congenial work. Why cannot all young men do as you have done? + +TIPPY. Not enough dogs, sir. + +BISHOP. It need not have been dogs. It might have been--other +things. + +TIPPY. True, sir. I considered the hanging of clothes lines for +women whose husbands are mechanical morons. + +BISHOP. That's an ingenious idea. + +TIPPY. But I found there weren't enough morons. Automobiles, sir, +have taught even the gentry to use screw drivers. + +BISHOP. I like your humor. You have enterprise and perspective. You +renew my faith in youth. I wish my son had such morale. I wish ... +Where is he, Timothy? Where is Kenneth? And Laura? Do you know +where they went? + +TIPPY. I'm afraid not. + +BISHOP. I must find them. [_Rises to go._] + +TIPPY. The best chance is they'll be back here. + +BISHOP. [_Sitting again, speaks slowly._] I am guilty of a great +wrong against my son. + +TIPPY. I'm sure it wasn't a wilful wrong. + +BISHOP. No. I love my son. I meant to help him. Sometimes it is +hard to know what is right and what is wrong. Timothy, I arranged +for my son to have a job. [_Pause._] I conspired to let him think +he had secured the job in the usual manner. I fear I made a great +mistake. + +TIPPY. I understand the spirit that prompted you. + +BISHOP. Thank you. [_Pause._] He called me up on the telephone and +said I had ruined his life with my meddling. He said I was an +unworthy example of a man of God. He said I had betrayed him ... +[_He is too moved to go on_,] He said harsh things--very harsh +things. + +TIPPY. I am very sorry, sir. [_He feels helpless to comfort the old +man. In the ensuing, uncomfortable silence,_ KEN, MARTIN _and_ +LAURA _come in_. KEN _is drunk and boisterous_, MARTIN _is trying +to hold him back,_ KEN _backs into the room, dragging_ MARTIN _with +him_. LAURA _follows._] + +KEN. I got to go in. Got to find Ted. I got to 'pologize to Ted. +[MARTIN, _seeing_ BISHOP, _lets go of_ KEN _who nearly falls_, KEN +_does not see his father._] I got to shake hands with him and say, +Ted, ol' boy, you're right. We're in the same boat. We're brothers +under the skin. We are both kept men. + +BISHOP. My son! + +KEN. [_Turns slowly and sees his father._] Hi, dad! [_Gestures to_ +LAURA.] Meet the wife. She got the job. You paid for it. [_Silence. +Gestures to_ MARTIN.] Meet Martin. He's a god-damned Communist. But +I like him. + +BISHOP. My son, you have been drinking. + +KEN. Drinking? [_Laughs--to_ MARTIN.] He thinks I have been +drinking. [_To_ TIPPY.] Hi! Good old Tippy. Washes dogs.--Kept +dogs. Kept women. Kept men. + +TIPPY. [_Taking him by the arm._] Come on, Ken. Come out in the +kitchen and have some coffee. + +KEN. I don't want coffee. Makes you 'member what you got drunk to +forget. + +TIPPY. All right, then. I'll give you some more whiskey. + +BISHOP. [_In horror._] I forbid. Please, no more liquor. + +KEN. That's right. No more liquor. Might forget too much. + +TIPPY. Then come in and go to sleep and forget everything. + +KEN. [_Shaking him off._] I don't want to forget. I want to +explain. [_Looking around at each._] Dad--Laura---Tippy--Martin. +Whole god-damn Class of '29. Class of '29.... Six years. Hi, +Martin, member the speeches? 'Member the Bac-ca-laurit address? +[_Struts and gestures._] Young men of the Class of '29. [_Gestures +left._] This is your god-damn old alma mater. [_Gestures right._] +And out there's the goddamn old world. [_Gestures left._] In there +you studied four years like sons-o'-guns, stuffing your empty heads +full of useless knowledge. [_Gestures right._] So you could go out +there and get a job. And make money. And get a house. And a car. +And a woman to sleep with. And have a baby, and vote the Republican +ticket.... And so what happens? Depressions and Democrats. And +Hoover--'member Hoover?--Hoover had to go back to Leland Stanford +libr'y to read a book to tell him why there's jobs for everybody in +Russia. [_He stops, looks at his father_.'] 'Scuse me. Hoover's all +wet. [To MARTIN, _belligerently_.'] My father's a bishop, see? +Russia's hell on bishops. This is the country for bishops. You are +out of luck, Martin. Your father made a mistake being a farmer. He +should have been a bishop. Nice jobs, lots of money. Buys a job for +his son so he can get married and have a wife and a home and a baby +and not be a Red. You think I'm a Red? Hell, no. I'm a hundred per +cent American. I'm an individualist. Americans are individualists. +Each man got his own wife 'n' his own bed. A Russian's a +collectivist. Got everybody's wife in bed. + +BISHOP. Kenneth, my son! + +KEN. See? My dad doesn't like Russians. Russians shot all the +churches and made the priests go to work. He doesn't like you.--You +read the wrong books. My dad reads Mark and Luke and John--makes +him a Christian. You read Marx and Lenin and Stalin--makes you a +revolutionist. Why don't you read Hearst and Hoover and make +yourself an American? + +TIPPY. Never mind, Ken. The revolution's all over. + +KEN. That was no revolution. That was only a depression. But it's +all over now. My father bought me a job because my wife told him +to. I've got a smart wife. She understands business methods. We are +individualists, and must have initiative. So my wife, she has +initiative. She says--Ken's got to have a job so we can get +married. So she explains to my father how capitalism works. Lots of +competition; too many lousy architects. So got to fabricate houses +and put 'em all out of a job. + +MARTIN. You talk more sense drunk than sober. + +KEN. Too many architects--so what? Give 'em relief work, that's +what. Make lots of little houses, with lots of little yards, with +lots of little trees, so there'll be lots of little leaves to rake. +[_Faces_ LAURA.] That's why a man needs a smart wife with lots of +initiative--to get him a job. + +TIPPY. O. K., Ken. + +LAURA. [_Fiercely._] Do something with him, Martin. + +MARTIN. [_Going to_ KEN.] All right, old man. Let's go in there and +see whether we can figure this thing out. + +KEN. I got it all figured out. Lots of little houses, 'n' lots of ... + +TIPPY. But we've got to figure out what to do about Ted. + +KEN. Ted. That's right ... Ted. [_The three go out to kitchen._] + +BISHOP. [_Wringing his hands._] Radicalism and liquor. Liquor and +radicalism, [LAURA _is unresponsive; sits stony-eyed and +heart-sick._] My poor child. My poor child. + +LAURA. Poor Ken! + +BISHOP. We must be strong. And patient. [_Silence._] How did he +learn of this? + +LAURA. He quarrelled with Ted and Ted lost his temper and told. + +BISHOP. Ted? But how came he to know of it? + +LAURA. Oh, I don't know. + +BISHOP. Such a nice young man, I always thought. He seemed so ... + +LAURA. [_In despair._] What are we to do about Ken? + +BISHOP. He blamed me. He said I had betrayed him. + +LAURA. [_Impatiently._] How are we to give him back his +self-confidence? + +BISHOP. He said I was dishonest. + +LAURA. If in some way I could return to him his lovely vanity. When +he had no job, he had no thought of me--none--none.... + +BISHOP. What is there left for him to believe in, when even I, his +father ... + +LAURA. Oh don't! It was my fault. Don't blame yourself. And anyway, +the only thing that matters is Ken. Don't you see? + +BISHOP. You're right, my child. + +LAURA. He's so crushed! And that despair that shuts me out! Why is +it? Why is it that a woman loves a man most when he has +nothing--and he wants her only when he has everything else? What's +going to happen to us? + +BISHOP. Everything will be all right, my child. Kenneth has +suffered a bitter blow to his pride. But he'll sober up and resign +himself to the situation. + +LAURA. Resign himself? + +BISHOP. We must make him see that that is the only thing to do. + +LAURA. But is it? Is there no hope of a real position? + +BISHOP. Prescott gave me his word when I--when we made the +arrangement--that he would make a real place for Kenneth as soon as +he could. + +LAURA. So far he hasn't. + +BISHOP. It's a matter of time. Business is greatly improved. +Building must revive by the spring. Therefore, don't you see, if +our boy is patient until then ... [LAURA _shakes her head._] We +must make him go on. If he gives it up now he may lose a real +opportunity. That is what you and I must make him see! The +opportunity ahead. + +LAURA. He couldn't go on. + +BISHOP. He must. + +LAURA. No. Why must he? + +BISHOP. [_Tenderly._] A family, my dear, is a very conclusive +argument. + +LAURA. Family? What do you mean? + +BISHOP. [_Still with his tender sentimentality._] I take it, since +Kenneth spoke of a wife and baby ... + +LAURA. [_Half-laughing._] Oh!--Thank God, no! + +BISHOP. But he said ... + +LAURA. That was just rhetoric.--I am not having any babies until I +see some security for them. + +BISHOP. Many of the unemployed do have children. + +LAURA. I'll have them only when I can see safety for them. + +BISHOP. Yes, yes. Well, I only thought that ... + +LAURA. That if a child were coming, Ken would have to knuckle +under. + +BISHOP. Such responsibility has always been the most powerful force +to make man go along the path of duty, even though the way seemed +hard. + +LAURA. At least I have spared Ken that! He _can_ do as he pleases. +I am still working, and can take care of myself. + +BISHOP. Yes, quite right. That is the way we must present it to +him. That he need consider only himself. + +LAURA. Poor Ken. What can he ... + +BISHOP. Sh! + +[KEN _enters, followed by_ MARTIN _and_ TIPPY.] + +KEN. Who said I had no manners! [_To_ BISHOP _and_ LAURA, _with +absurd, ironic dignity._] The boys say I wasn't a gentleman. I +apologize. + +LAURA. Never mind, Ken. + +KEN. A man ought to be a gentleman, even to his wife. [_She turns +away. To his father._] A man ought to respect his father. I +apologize. + +BISHOP. I accept your apology, son. + +KEN. [_To boys._] There you are! I apologized to my father. He +accepted my apology. [_To_ LAURA.] I apologize. + +LAURA. All right, Ken. I accept your apology. [_At the end of her +self-control._] And now that's enough. + +KEN. No. I got one more apology to make. + +TIPPY. All right, Ken. I'll take the next one. + +KEN. I didn't insult you. + +TIPPY. No. Well, whom did you insult? + +KEN. I insulted Mr. Prescott. + +BISHOP. Prescott? + +LAURA. You haven't anything to apologize to him for, Ken! + +KEN. I called him a lousy heel. If that's all right with you, I +won't apologize. + +TIPPY. You did what? + +KEN. I called up Mr. Prescott on the telephone and told him ... + +LAURA. When did you call him on the telephone? + +KEN. Before. + +BISHOP. You were drunk! + +KEN. I wasn't drunk then. + +LAURA. What did you tell him? + +KEN. Specifically?--Specifically I told him--Martin'll like +this.... [_Looks about blankly, doesn't see_ MARTIN.] I told him +that as a multimillionaire, as a captain of industry, as a pillar +of capitalistic society, he ought to be ashamed of himself for +robbing the widows and the orphans and taking the money out of the +collection baskets of the House of God to pay an architect to draw +plans for a wastebasket. + +TIPPY. Good Lord! + +KEN. [_To_ LAURA.] You think I ought to apologize to him for that? + +BISHOP. If you really did say anything like that to Prescott, of +course you will have to apologize. + +KEN. [_To_ LAURA.] Dad is a gentleman. And he thinks I ought to +apologize. Well, what do you think? + +LAURA. Oh, leave me alone, leave me alone! + +BISHOP. But surely that is all a figment of your imagination.--When +a man has been under the influence of liquor and then--then +recovers from its influence, how much does he remember? + +TIPPY. That depends. + +KEN. Let me explain. I know all about it. A man gets drunk in order +to forget what he had on his mind when he was sober. And then he +gets sober in order to forget what he said when he was drunk. + +BISHOP. [_Almost pathetically._] Then surely you are mistaken, son. +You did not say these things to Mr. Prescott. You do not remember +what you did say--or even if you spoke to him at all. + +KEN. Oh, yes, I do remember. Because I was not drunk when I spoke +to Prescott. And I am not drunk now. + +BISHOP. My boy ... + +KEN. I was drunk. That's how come I was disrespectful. A quart of +whiskey makes any man disrespectful; but a cup of coffee makes a +man respect his father, and two cups of coffee makes a man respect +his wife. + +MARTIN. Give him another cup and he'll respect Prescott. + +KEN. Hello. Where'd you come from? + +MARTIN. I've been here all the time. + +KEN. That's fine. That's fine. Having a good time? + +MARTIN. Punk! + +KEN. That's too bad. All right. Tell us what you think. + +MARTIN. I think you ought to go home and sleep it off and then go +back on the job. + +KEN. Ain't got no job. + +MARTIN. Well, I mean go back to Prescott. + +KEN. Didn't you hear? There is no Prescott. There is no job. + +MARTIN. Yes, but there's work. And work is more important than the +matter of who pays for it. + +KEN. Work for the wastebasket? + +MARTIN. No. Not for the wastebasket. For whatever use it may be to +the world. Your work is important because you are creating +something. The pay system has stalled on you, so what? If your +father is able to help to keep you at work, the best you can do is +to accept it. + +KEN. Have you gone screwy? [To TIPPY.] IS that Communism? + +MARTIN. I believe in revolutions, not in futile personal +rebellions. + +KEN. [_To_ TIPPY.] Do you get him? + +TIPPY. I think so. + +KEN. For God's sake, do you agree with him? + +TIPPY. Listen, old man, you believe in those plans of yours ... + +KEN. No. I don't believe in anything, in anything, do you hear? Not +in the love of a father for his son, or in the love of a wife for +her husband, or in the loyalty of friends--or in the integrity of +one's purposes, or in the sincerity of one's hopes, or in the +greatness of one's ambitions. + +TIPPY. That's how you feel _now_, Ken + +MARTIN. You know doggone well you believe in your work. You love +it. You live it. + +KEN. [_Quietly._] So you think I ought to call up Prescott and +apologize. Is that it? + +MARTIN. Why not? A son of a bitch like Prescott? [_A moment's +silence._] + +KEN. [_To_ TIPPY.] And you! [_To his father._] And you, of course ... +[_To_ LAURA.] And you ... + +LAURA. [_Breathlessly._] You must do whatever you like. + +KEN. All right, I won't hold you responsible. + +LAURA. I only meant ... I can take care of myself and ... + +KEN. And of me, too. + +LAURA. No, Ken ... I ... [_The_ BISHOP _stops her._] + +KEN. So you all think I ought to apologize to Mr. Prescott. That's +great. [_Into telephone._] Circle 7-6799 ... That's great ... +[_Into telephone._] Mr. Kenneth Holden would like to speak with +his employer, Mr. Stanley Prescott. [_Plainly._] The name is +Holden. That's right.--What do I want? I want to apologize. Tell +him I want to apologize. [_Pause._] Hello, Mr. Prescott? This is +Kenneth Holden. I called up to apologize. [_His voice is still +high._] I called you up earlier in the evening, Mr. Prescott, and +criticized our working arrangement. Well, sir, I have become +convinced that the work is more important than the arrangement, so +with your kind permission ... [_Listens, as to an interruption. His +confident manner slowly disappears. He listens with growing +humiliation._] I'm sorry, sir. I didn't mean to use that tone. +Yes--I mean it.--Yes, sir.... [_Almost in a whisper._] Thank you. +[_Slowly, with an air of absolute defeat, he hangs up the +receiver._] + +BISHOP. My son, that was a brave thing. It's wisest for you to keep +the arrangement for the present, until ... it won't be long ... +[_Clears his throat; looks at his watch._] My train. I've just time +to catch it. [_To_ KEN.] You'll feel better about it in the +morning, son. + +TIPPY. I'll call you a cab, sir. + +KEN. Good-bye, dad. + +[BISHOP _and_ TIPPY _go._] + +MARTIN. [_To no one at all._] Damn it all! + +LAURA. If you'd kept still he wouldn't have done it. + +KEN. [_Roughly._] Are you ashamed? Trying to apologize for my +apologizing? + +LAURA. No, Ken, no. + +KEN. You're right to be ashamed of me.... + +MARTIN. Damn if anybody makes sense around here! + +KEN. Didn't you hear my father? He said I'd feel better about it in +the morning. [_Sinks into apathy._] In the morning! + +TIPPY. [_Returning._] Well ... + +MARTIN. It's been a fine day! + +TIPPY. Yes--great! + +MARTIN. That was a good idea you had, reunion of the Class of '29. + +TIPPY. I meant well. + +LAURA. Of course you did! + +TIPPY. We'll have one yet, I tell you. + +LAURA. And soon. + +TIPPY. And we'll all have jobs. + +LAURA. Real jobs--important jobs! + +[_They try to make_ KEN _pay attention, but he doesn't._] + +TIPPY. Mr. Prescott will discover that Ken is really a genius and... + +MARTIN. And he'll fabricate the houses; millions of houses, all +according to Ken's plans--millions and millions and millions of +'em--and all for individualists. + +TIPPY. Hi, Laura, you'll have advance models! + +LAURA. Like a Paris frock. + +TIPPY. You'll be the envy of all women. + +LAURA. I know it--because Ken will be so famous; and I'll be proud. +[_There is a rapping at the door_, TIPPY _opens and_ POLICEMAN +_enters, bringing_ KATE, _who is in state of collapse_, KEN +_continues to sit staring bitterly into space. Repeats out loud: +Feel better about it in the morning_, LAURA _rushes to_ KATE.] +Kate! What happened? + +POLICEMAN. Friend of yours? + +TIPPY. Yes, that's right. + +[KATE _stares wildly, shivers_, LAURA _attends her_. POLICEMAN +_draws_ TIPPY _and_ MARTIN _aside._] + +POLICEMAN. Theodore Brooks--you knew him? + +TIPPY. Yes. What happened? + +POLICEMAN. Now take it calm. + +MARTIN. All right. Go on. + +POLICEMAN. Train. Subway train. + +TIPPY. Good God! + +MARTIN. Is he dead? + +POLICEMAN. Killed outright. It was suicide. Plenty of witnesses. He +was standing with her, waiting for the train. He jerked away and +jumped just as the train came in. She'd have gone over with him if +somebody hadn't grabbed her. + +TIPPY. God, how awful! + +POLICEMAN. It was pretty messy. + +LAURA. She needs a doctor. + +POLICEMAN. Tried to get her to go to Bellevue ... + +MARTIN. There's a doctor three doors down. I'll get him. + +POLICEMAN. I guess there's nothing more I can do. I'll wait outside +and see if the doc's coming. [To TIPPY.] Your man's at the morgue +if you want him. + +TIPPY. Yes--yes--thanks ... [POLICEMAN _goes._] + +KEN. [_Who has become aware, looks bewilderedly from one to the +other._] What's up, Tippy? What's the matter? + +TIPPY. [_Quietly._] Ted's dead, Ken. + +KEN. Dead?--Dead? + +TIPPY. He killed himself. He ... [_His voice breaks._] + +KEN. Dead! [_Pause._] The lucky bastard! + +CURTAIN + + + + + + + +CLASS of '29 + + +PROPERTY PLOT--ACT I, SCENE I + + +OFF STAGE U. R. + +ENVELOPE with note +GROCERY BAG with oranges and cans +BOX OF TEA +SMALL BAG OF SUGAR +2 SOVIET POSTERS +SEVERAL DIFFERENT RELIEF BLANKS +2 SHOPPING BAGS + + +OFF STAGE U. L. + +TRAY with teapot, cups, saucers, spoons, +sandwiches, sugar +EMPTY WASHTUB +TIN CANS +LARGE TOWEL +KITCHEN TABLE, against backing off U. L., +dressed with plates, eggbeater, cups +and saucers, etc. + + +ON STAGE + +GROUND CLOTH +OBLONG TABLE c. dressed with: + 1. Ironing board + 2. Pencil + 3. Iron + 4. Piece of Muslin for pressing + 5. One newspaper + 6. Cigarettes and matches + 7. Ash trays + 8. Russian dictionary + 9. Russian book +10. Table throw +EASEL AND STOOL (at window, L.) dressed with: + 1. Drawing board + 2. 2 plans of houses + 3. T square + 4. Drawing paper +WINDOW SEAT L. dressed with: + 1. Glass of brushes and drawing pencils + 2. Brass pitcher with drawing pencils + 3. Water colors + 4. Magazines + 5. Blue prints +BOOKCASE (U. C.) dressed with: + 1. Book + 2. Large rolls of blueprints + 3. Magazines (on top) + 4. Bottles of red ink + 5. Box of thumb tacks + 6. Russian Primer (special book) +STUDIO COUCH R.(head down stage) dressed with: + 1. Sofa cushions + 2. Brush + 3. Newspaper (on foot) + 4. Ties +EASY CHAIR (D. L.) +4 STRAIGHT BACK CHAIRS (1 D. R.; +1 U. L. C.; 1 L. and 1 R. of table C.) +DRAWING PORTFOLIO (at jog U. L.) +WASTEBASKET (behind easel) +PLANS AND PICTURES OF HOUSES (on walls) +OLD GREEN WINDOW SHADES +OLD LACE CURTAINS (on window, doors +U. B,. and D. L.) +BROOM at bureau (U. L.) +TRIANGLE AND ODD SKETCHES +(on jog at window L.) +GREEN EYESHADE (on bridge lamp L.) + + +OFF STAGE D. R. + +CHEST OF SHELVES, covered with cretonne +(against backing) + + +PERSONAL PROPS + +TIPPY: Hat off D. R., cigarettes, stained handkerchief, +pants (on ironing board) +BISHOP: Fountain pen, watch, check, checkbook +TED: Coat and hat (off D. R.), book "Sun Also Rises" (on couch R.) +KEN: Hat (on bookcase U. C.) +KATE: One five dollar bill; three one dollar bills +MARTIN: Eight one dollar bills + + + +PROPERTY PLOT--ACT 1 SCENE 2 + +RUG (on floor) +BROWN REP DRAPES (on window) +OFFICE DESK + + +ON THIS DESK + +DESK SET--Consisting of: blotter, pen holder, fountain pens +2 FRENCH PHONES +DESK LAMP +WOODEN PAPER TRAY with documents +DOCUMENTS AND LETTERS (C. of desk) +PUSH BUTTON (on desk) +GOOD ASH TRAY +SWIVEL CHAIR (behind desk) +VISITOR'S ARMCHAIR (L. of desk) + + +OFF D. L. + +LEATHER OFFICE CHAIR +SHORTHAND PAD +PENCIL + + +PERSONAL PROPS + +BRIEF CASE (Prescott) + + +PROPERTY PLOT--ACT II + +OFF STAGE U. R. + +RELIEF BLANKS with rubber band +2 SHOPPING BAGS + + +OFF STAGE U. L. + +KITCHEN TABLE from Act I against backing redressed +TIN CANS added +EMPTY WASHTUB + + +ON STAGE + +GREEN TABLE C. dressed with: + Stack of towels, 1 towel spread C. of table + Cup of water and absorbent cotton +SHOWCASE against wall U. C. filled with dog supplies: + Harness, collars, testimonials, dog basket + Ash tray (on showcase) + +CHEST OF SHELVES against R. wall dressed with: + Dog brushes, dog collars, sponges, harness, dog blankets + Telephone and ash tray (on top of shelves) +SMALL SHELF TABLE against jog U. L. dressed with: + Loose books from bookcase in Act I + 4 Books stacked (on top) + 1 Newspaper (on top) + Book ends + 2 Newspapers (on shelf) + 2 Magazines (on shelf) + Ash tray (on top) +DRAWING TABLE (at window E.) dressed with: + Drawing paper, drawings of Ted (in profile) +WINDOW SEAT L. with dressing rearranged and blueprints struck +MAPLE CHAIR (behind drawing table) +WASTEBASKET R. of drawing table +CONSOLE TABLE up R. dressed with: + Newspapers, magazines, ash trays +PADDED EASY CHAIR from Act I with slip cover (at console table) +WINDSOR CHAIR L. of table C. +3 GREEN CHAIRS, 1 D. R., 1 behind table, 1 R. of table +1 MAPLE CHAIR D. L. +CARTOONS (on walls) +PICTURES of dogs, and supply signs (on walls) +SIGN--"I CLIP, PLUCK AND TRIM" on wall over door U. R. +SIGN--"DOG LAUNDRY" outside door U. R. +NEW CREAM WINDOW SHADES (at window and door L.) +LACE CURTAINS (on transom) +WALL MIRROR over console table R. +WASHTUB with water D. R. +2 WET TOWELS, 1 on floor below table c, 1 U. L. of table C. +GREEN EYESHADE (on hook on jog U. L.) +DOG LEASHES (on jamb of door U. L.) + + +OFF STAGE D. R. + +BUREAU from Act I against backing dressed + + +PERSONAL PROPS + +TIPPY: Suit coat, rubber apron off D. R. +MARTIN: Hat on showcase U. C. +KEN: Cigarettes +CASE WORKER: Fountain pen and pencil + + +PROPERTY PLOT--ACT III + +(Same as Act II) +NOTE: Strike package on showcase U. C. + + +PERSONAL PROPS + +LAURA: Fur (on chair above table C.) +MARTIN: Hat (on case U. C.) + + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's Class of '29, by Orrie Lashin and Milo Hastings + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CLASS OF '29 *** + +***** This file should be named 17061.txt or 17061.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/1/7/0/6/17061/ + +Produced by Roger Taft, RogerTaft_AT_Cox.Net, grandson +of Milo Hastings, and Jim Tinsley. + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, +set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to +copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to +protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. 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