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diff --git a/15855.txt b/15855.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..72cbee6 --- /dev/null +++ b/15855.txt @@ -0,0 +1,4974 @@ +The Project Gutenberg eBook, The Man from Home, by Booth Tarkington and +Harry Leon Wilson, Illustrated by Luther S. White + + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + + + + +Title: The Man from Home + + +Author: Booth Tarkington and Harry Leon Wilson + +Release Date: May 18, 2005 [eBook #15855] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII) + + +***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MAN FROM HOME*** + + +E-text prepared by Suzanne Shell, Josephine Paolucci, Joshua Hutchinson, +and the Project Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team + + + +Note: Project Gutenberg also has an HTML version of this + file which includes the original illustrations. + See 15855-h.htm or 15855-h.zip: + (https://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/1/5/8/5/15855/15855-h/15855-h.htm) + or + (https://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/1/5/8/5/15855/15855-h.zip) + + + + + +THE MAN FROM HOME + +by + +BOOTH TARKINGTON and HARRY LEON WILSON + +With Illustrations from Scenes in the Play + +Harper & Brothers + +1908 + + + + + + + +[Illustration: THE MAN FROM HOME] + + + + + +TO + +WILLIAM HODGE + +THE MAN FROM HOME + + + + +ORIGINAL CAST OF CHARACTERS IN +_THE MAN FROM HOME_ +BY +BOOTH TARKINGTON and HARRY LEON WILSON +PRESENTED UNDER THE MANAGEMENT OF LIEBLER & CO. +AT THE STUDEBAKER THEATRE, CHICAGO +SEPTEMBER 29, 1907, +WHERE IT RAN FOR A YEAR; THEN OPENED IN NEW YORK +AT THE ASTOR THEATRE +AUGUST 17, 1908 + + +CHARACTERS AND PLAYERS + +DANIEL VOORHEES PIKE WILLIAM HODGE +THE GRAND DUKE VASILI VASILIVITCH EBEN PLYMPTON +THE EARL OF HAWCASTLE E. J. RATCLIFFE +THE HON. ALMERIC ST. AUBYN ECHLIN P. GAYER +IVANOFF HENRY HARMON +HORACE GRANGER-SIMPSON HASSARD SHORT +RIBIERE HARRY L. LANG +MARIANO ANTHONY ASHER +MICHELE ANTONIO SALERNO +CARABINIERE A. MONTEGRIFFO +VALET DE CHAMBRE C. L. FELTON +ETHEL GRANGER-SIMPSON OLIVE WYNDHAM +COMTESSE DE CHAMPIGNY ALICE JOHNSON +LADY CREECH. IDA VERNON + +TIME: THE PRESENT + +PLACE: SORRENTO, SOUTHERN ITALY + + + + +ILLUSTRATIONS + + +THE MAN FROM HOME + +"OH NO! SHE ACCEPTED ME" + +"YES, SIR, DANIEL VOORHEES PIKE, ATTORNEY AT LAW, KOKOMO, INDIANA" + +"_THIS_ IS MR. ST. AUBYN" + +"THE NEW CHAUFFEUR FOR THE MACHINE, FROM NAPLES" + +"YOU'RE AFTER SOMETHING THERE ISN'T ANYTHING TO" + +"IVAN! DON'T KILL ME!" + +"MY FRIEND, THERE IS SAND IN YOUR GEAR-BOX" + +The illustrations are from photographs of scenes in the play made +especially for the book by Mr. Luther S. White. + + + + +CHARACTERS + + +MEN + +DANIEL VOORHEES PIKE +Of Kokomo, Indiana + +THE GRAND-DUKE VASILI VASILIVITCH + +THE EARL OF HAWCASTLE + +THE HON. ALMERIC ST. AUBYN +Son of Lord Hawcastle + +IVANOFF + +HORACE GRANGER-SIMPSON + +RIBIERE +The Grand-Duke's secretary + +MARIANO +Maitre d'hotel + +MICHELE +A waiter + +Two carabiniere + +A valet de chambre + +Several Sorrentine musicians and fishermen + + +WOMEN + +ETHEL GRANGER-SIMPSON + +COMTESSE DE CHAMPIGNY + +LADY CREECH +Sister-in-law of Hawcastle + +ACT I.--The terrace of the Hotel Regina Margherita on the cliff at +Sorrento. Morning. + +ACT II.--The entrance garden. Afternoon. + +ACT III.--An apartment in the hotel. Evening. + +ACT IV.--The terrace. Morning. + +The time is the present. + +The scene is Sorrento, in Southern Italy. + + + + +THE FIRST ACT + + +SCENE: The terrace of the Hotel Regina Margherita, on the cliff at +Sorrento, overlooking the Bay of Naples. + +There is a view of the bay and its semi-circular coast-line, dotted with +villages; Vesuvius gray in the distance. Across the stage at the rear +runs a marble balustrade about three feet high, guarding the edge of the +cliff. Upon the left is seen part of one wing of the hotel, entrance to +which is afforded by wide-open double doors approached by four or five +marble steps with a railing and small stoop. The hotel is of pink and +white stucco, and striped awnings shield the windows. Upon the right is +a lemon grove and shrubberies. There are two or three small white wicker +tea-tables and a number of wicker chairs upon the left, and a square +table laid with white cloth on the right. + +As the curtain rises mandolins and guitars are heard, and the +"Fisherman's Song," the time very rapid and gay, the musicians being +unseen. + +MARIANO, maitre d'hotel, is discovered laying the table down R.C. with +eggs, coffee, and rolls for two. He is a pleasant-faced, elderly man, +stout, swarthy, clean shaven; wears dress-clothes, white waist-coat, and +black tie. He is annoyed by the music. + +MARIANO [calling to the unseen musicians crossly]. Silenzio! + +[MICHELE enters from the hotel. He is young, clean-shaven except for a +dark mustache, wears a white tie, a blue coat, cut like dress-coat, blue +trousers with red side stripes, brass buttons; his waistcoat is of +striped red and blue.] + +MICHELE [speaking over his shoulder]. Par ici, Monsieur Ribiere, pour le +maitre d'hotel. + +[RIBIERE enters from the hotel.] + +[MICHELE immediately withdraws.] + +[RIBIERE is a trim, business-like young Frenchman of some distinction of +appearance. He wears a well-made English dark "cutaway" walking-suit, a +derby hat, and carries a handsome leather writing-case under his arm.] + +RIBIERE. [as he enters]. Ah, Mariano! + +MARIANO. [bowing and greeting him gayly]. Monsieur Ribiere! J'espere que +vous etes-- + +[He breaks off, turns on his heel toward the invisible musicians, and +shouts.] + +Silenzio! + +[He turns again quickly to RIBIERE.] + +RIBIERE. [with a warning glance toward hotel]. Let us speak English. +There are not so many who understand. + +MARIANO. [politely]. I hope Monsieur still occupy the exalt' position of +secretar' to Monseigneur the Grand-Duke. + +RIBIERE. [sits and opens writing-case, answers gravely]. We will not +mention the name or rank of my employer. + +MARIANO. [with gesture and accent of despair]. Again incognito! Every +year he come to our hotel for two, three day, but always incognito. + +[He finishes setting the table.] + +We lose the honor to have it known. + +RIBIERE. [looking at his watch]. He comes in his automobile from Naples. +Everything is to be as on my employer's former visits--strictly +incognito. It is understood every one shall address him as Herr von +Groellerhagen-- + +MARIANO [repeating the name carefully]. Herr von Groellerhagen-- + +RIBIERE. He wishes to be thought a German. + +[Takes a note-book from case.] + +MARIANO. Such a man! of caprice? Excentrique? Ha! + +RIBIERE. You have said it. Last night he talked by chance to a singular +North American in the hotel at Napoli. To-day he has that stranger for +companion in the automobile. I remonstrate. What use? He laugh for half +an hour! + +MARIANO. He is not like those cousin of his at St. Petersburg an' +Moscowa. An' yet though Monseigneur is so good an' generoso, will not +the anarchist strike against the name of royalty himself? You have not +the fear? + +RIBIERE [opening his note-book]. I have. He has _not_. I take what +precaution I can secretly from him. You have few guests? + +MARIANO [smiling]. It is so early in the season. Those poor musician' +[nodding off right] they wait always at every gate, to play when they +see any one coming. There is only seex peoples in the 'ole house! All of +one party. + +RIBIERE. Good! Who are they? + +MARIANO. There is Milor', an English Excellency--the Earl of Hawcastle; +there is his son, the Excellency Honorabile Almeric St. Aubyn; there is +Miladi Creeshe, an English Miladi who is sister-in-law to Milor' +Hawcastle. + +RIBIERE [taking notes]. Three English. + +MARIANO. There is an American Signorina, Mees Granger-Seempsone. Miladi +Creeshe travel with her to be chaperone. [Enthusiastically.] She is +young, generosa, she give money to every one, she is multa bella, so +pretty, weeth charm-- + +RIBIERE [puzzled]. You speak now of Lady Creeshe? + +MARIANO [taken aback]. Oh no, no, no! Miladi Creeshe is ol' lady +[tapping his ears]. Not hear well. Deaf. No pourboires. Nothing. I speak +of the young American lady, Mees Granger-Seempsone who the English +Honorabile son of Milor' Hawcastle wish to espouse, I think. + +RIBIERE. Who else is there? + +MARIANO. There is the brother of Mees Granger-Seempsone, a young +gentleman of North America. He make the eyes [laughing] all day at +another lady who is of the party, a French lady, Comtesse de Champigny. +Ha, ha! That amuse' me! + +RIBIERE. Why? + +MARIANO. Beckoss I think Comtesse de Champigny is a such good friend of +the ol' English Milor' Hawcastle. A maitre d'hotel see many things, an' +I think Milor' Hawcastle and Madame de Champigny have know each other +from long, perhaps. This dejeuner is for them. + +RIBIERE. And who else? + +MARIANO. It is all. + +RIBIERE. Good! no Russians? + +MARIANO. I think Milor' Hawcastle and Madame de Champigny have been in +Russia sometime. + +RIBIERE [putting his note-book in his pocket]. Why? + +MARIANO. Beckoss once I have hear them spik Russian togezzer. + +RIBIERE. I think there is small chance that they recognize my employer. +His portrait is little known. + +MARIANO. And this North American who come in the automobile--does _he_ +know who he travel wiz? Does he know his Highness? + +RIBIERE. No more than the baby which is not borned. + +MARIANO [lifting his eyes to heaven]. Ah! + +RIBIERE [looking at his watch]. Set dejeuner on the terrace instantly +when he arrive: a perch, petit pois, iced figs, tea. I will send his own +caviar and vodka from the supplies I carry. + +MARIANO. I set for one? + +RIBIERE. For two. He desires that the North American breakfast with him. +Do not forget that the incognito is to be absolute. + +[Exit into hotel.] + +MARIANO. Va bene, Signore! + +[Puts finishing-touches to the table.] + +[Enter from the grove, LORD HAWCASTLE. He is a well-preserved man of +fifty-six with close-clipped gray mustache and gray hair; his eyes are +quick and shrewd; his face shows some slight traces of high living; he +carries himself well and his general air is distinguished and high-bred. +He wears a suit of thinly striped white flannel and white shoes, a +four-in-hand tie of pale old-rose crape, a Panama hat with broad ribbon +striped with white and old-rose of the same shade as his tie. His accent +is that of a man of the world, and quite without affectation. He comes +at once upon his entrance to a chair at the table.] + +[MICHELE enters at same time up left, with a folded newspaper.] + +HAWCASTLE [as he enters]. Good-morning, Mariano! + +MARIANO [bowing]. Milor' Hawcastle is serve. + +[Takes HAWCASTLE'S hat and places it upon a stool behind table.] + +MICHELE [hands HAWCASTLE newspaper from under his arm]. _Il Mattino_, +the morning journal from Napoli, Milor'. + +HAWCASTLE [accepting paper and unfolding it]. No English papers? + +MICHELE. Milor', the mail is late. + +[Exit up left.] + +HAWCASTLE [sitting]. And Madame de Champigny? + +[MARIANO serves coffee, etc.] + +[As HAWCASTLE speaks the COMTESSE DE CHAMPIGNY enters from hotel. She is +a pretty Frenchwoman of thirty-two. She wears a fashionable summer +Parisian morning dress, light and gay in color, a short-sleeved little +Empire jacket, and long gloves. She carries a parasol. Her elaborately +dressed hair is surmounted by a jaunty Parisian toque.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [lifting her hand gayly as she enters, and striking +a little attitude before she descends the steps]. Me voici! + +HAWCASTLE [half rising and bowing]. My esteemed relative is still +asleep? + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [speaking gayly, with a very slight accent, as she +crosses to a chair at the table]. I trust your beautiful son has found +much better employment--as our hearts would wish him to. + +HAWCASTLE. He has. He's off on a canter with the little American, thank +God! + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [interjecting the word]. Bravo! + +[She turns the hands of her gloves back and sips coffee, MARIANO +serving.] + +HAWCASTLE [continuing]. But I didn't mean Almeric. I meant my august +sister-in-law. + +[He reads the paper.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [smiling]. The amiable Lady Victoria Hermione +Trevelyan Creech has dejeuner in her apartment. What you find to read? + +HAWCASTLE. I'm such a duffer at Italian, but apparently the people +along the coast are having a scare over an escaped convict--a Russian. + +MARIANO [starting slightly, drops a spoon noisily upon a plate on the +table]. Pardon, Milor'! + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [setting down her coffee abruptly]. A Russian? + +HAWCASTLE [translating with difficulty]. "An escaped Russian bandit has +been traced to Castellamare--" + +[Pauses.] + +MARIANO [awe-struck]. Castellamare--not twelve kilometres from here! + +HAWCASTLE [continuing]. "--and a confidential agent"--[looking +up]--secret-service man, I dare say--"has requested his arrest. But the +brigand tore himself"--[repeating slowly]--"tore himself"--What the +deuce does that mean? + +MARIANO [bowing]. Pardon, Milor'--if I might-- + +HAWCASTLE. Quite right, Mariano! + +[Handing him the paper.] + +Translate for us. + +MARIANO [reading rapidly, but with growing agitation which he tries to +conceal]. "The brigan' tore himself from the hands of the carabiniere +and without the doubts he conceal himself in some of those grotto near +Sorrento and searchment is being execute'. The agent of the Russian +embassy have inform' the bureau that this escaped one is a mos' +in-fay-mose robber and danger brigand." + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [quickly]. What name does the journal say he has? + +MARIANO [hurriedly]. It has not to say. That is all. Will Milor' and +Madame la Comtesse excuse me? And may I take the journal? There is one +who should see it. + +HAWCASTLE [indifferently]. Very well. + +MARIANO. Thank you, Milor'! + +[Bows hastily and hurries out up left.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [gravely, drawing back from the table.] I should +like much to know his name. + +HAWCASTLE [smiling, and eating composedly]. You may be sure it isn't +Ivanoff. + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [not changing her attitude]. How can one know it is +not [pauses and speaks the name very gravely] Ivanoff? + +HAWCASTLE [laughing]. He wouldn't be called an infamous brigand. + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [very gravely]. That, my friend, may be only Italian +journalism. + +HAWCASTLE. Pooh! This means a highwayman--[finishes his coffee +coolly]--not--not an embezzler, Helene. + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [taking a deep breath and sinking back in her chair +with a fixed gaze]. I am glad to believe it, but I care for no more to +eat. I have some foolish feeling of unsafety. It is now two nights that +I dream of him--of Ivanoff--bad dreams for us both, my friend. + +HAWCASTLE [laughing]. What rot! It takes more than a dream to bring a +man back from Siberia. + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY. Then I pray there has been no more than dreams. + +[Music of mandolins and guitars heard off to the right with song--"The +Fisherman's Song."] + +[Enter ETHEL gayly and quickly from the grove, her face radiant. She is +a very pretty American girl of twenty. She wears a light-brown linen +skirted coat, fitting closely, and a country riding-skirt of the same +material and color, with boots, a shirt-waist, collar and tie, and +three-cornered hat. She carries a riding-crop. She is followed by three +musicians (two mandolins and a guitar), who laughingly continue the +song. They are shabby fellows, two of them barefooted, wearing shabby, +patched velveteen trousers and blue flannel shirts open at the throat, +with big black hats, old and shapeless. One makes a low and sweeping bow +before ETHEL; she takes money from her glove and gives it to him, the +other two not discontinuing the song; the three immediately 'bout face +and go out gleefully, capering and still singing.] + +HAWCASTLE [who has risen]. The divine Miss Granger-Simpson! + +ETHEL [with a pronounced "English accent"]. The divinely happy Miss +Granger-Simpson! + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [rising, running to her, and kissing her]. Oh, I +hope you mean-- + +HAWCASTLE [with some excitement in his voice]. You mean you have made my +son divinely happy? + +[ETHEL, as he speaks, extricates herself laughingly from MADAME DE +CHAMPIGNY.] + +ETHEL. Is not every one happy in Sorrento--[with a wave of her +riding-crop]--even your son? + +[Exit laughingly and hurriedly into the hotel.] + +[MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY goes to stool behind table and gets her parasol, as +HAWCASTLE resumes his seat.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY. Ah! that is good. Listen! + +[A piano sounds from the room ETHEL has just entered, breaking loudly +and gayly into Chaminade's "Elevation." ETHEL'S voice is heard for a +moment, also, singing.] + +She has flown to her piano. It looks well, indeed--our little +enterprise. + +HAWCASTLE [grimly]. It's time. If Almeric had been anything but a clumsy +oof he'd have made her settle it weeks ago! + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [quickly]. You are invidious, mon ami! My affair is +not settled--am _I_ a clumsy oof? + +HAWCASTLE [leaning toward her across the table and speaking sharply and +earnestly]. No, Helene. _Your_ little American, brother Horace, is so in +love with you, if you asked him suddenly, "Is this day or night?" he +would answer, "It's Helene." But he's too shy to speak. You're a +woman--you can't press matters; but Almeric's a man--he can. He can urge +an immediate marriage, which means an immediate settlement, and a direct +one. + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [seriously, quickly]. It will not be small, that +settlement? + +[He shakes his head grimly, leaning back to look at her. She continues +eagerly.] + +You have decide' what sum? + +[He nods decidedly.] + +What? + +HAWCASTLE [sharply, with determination, yet quietly]. A hundred and +fifty thousand pounds! + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [excited and breathless]. My friend! Will she? + +[Turns and stares toward ETHEL'S room, where the piano is still heard +softly playing.] + +HAWCASTLE. Not for Almeric, but to be the future Countess of Hawcastle. +My sister-in-law hasn't been her chaperone for a year for nothing. And, +by Jove, she hasn't done it for nothing, either! + +[He laughs grimly, moving back from the table.] + +But she's deserved all I shall allow her. + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [coldly]. Why? + +HAWCASTLE [rising]. It was she who found these people. Indeed, we might +say that both you and I owe her something also. [Comes around behind +table to MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY.] Even a less captious respectability than +Lady Creech's might have looked askance at the long friendship [kisses +her hand] which has existed between us. Yet she has always countenanced +us, though she must have guessed--a great many things. And she will help +us to urge an immediate marriage. You know as well as I do that unless +it is immediate, there'll be the devil to pay. Don't miss _that_ +essential: something must be done at once. We're at the +breaking-point--if you like the words--a most damnable insolvency. + +[Enter ALMERIC from the grove. He is a fair, fresh-colored Englishman of +twenty-five, handsome in a rather vacuous way. He wears white duck +riding-breeches, light-tan leather riding-gaiters and shoes, a +riding-coat of white duck, a waistcoat light tan in shade, and a high +riding-stock, the collar of which is white, the "puffed" tie pink; a +Panama hat with a fold of light tan and white silk round the crown. +Carries a riding-crop.] + +ALMERIC [as he enters]. Hello, Governor! + +[His voice is habitually loud and his accent somewhat foppish, having a +little of the "Guardsman" affectation of languor and indifference.] + +Howdy, Countess! + +[He drops into a chair at the breakfast-table with a slight effect of +sprawling.] + +HAWCASTLE [sharply]. Almeric! + +ALMERIC. Out riding a bit ago, you know, with Miss Granger-Simpson. +Rippin' girl, _isn't_ she? + +HAWCASTLE [leaning across the table toward him, anxiously]. Go on! + +ALMERIC [continuing, slapping his gaiters carelessly with his crop]. +Didn't stop with her, though. + +HAWCASTLE [angrily]. Why not? + +ALMERIC. A sort of man in the village got me to go look at a +bull-terrier pup. Wonderful little beast for points. Jolly +luck--_wasn't_ it? He's got a _head_ on him-- + +HAWCASTLE [bitterly]. We'll concede his _tremendous_ advantage over you +in that respect. + +[Throws his cigar disgustedly into one of the coffee-cups on the table.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [eagerly]. Is that _all_ you have to tell us? + +ALMERIC. Oh no! She accepted me. + +[HAWCASTLE drops into a chair with a long breath of relief.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [waving her parasol]. Enfin! Bravo! And will she let +it be soon? + +ALMERIC [sincerely]. I dare say there'll be no row about that; I've made +her aw'fly happy. + +HAWCASTLE. On my soul, I believe you're right--and thank God you are! + +[Rises as he speaks and walks up centre. Breaks off short as he sees +HORACE.] + +[Illustration: "OH NO! SHE ACCEPTED ME"] + +Here's the brother--attention now! + +[HORACE enters the hotel. He is a boyish-looking American of twenty-two, +smooth-shaven. He wears white flannels, the coat double-breasted and +buttoned, the tie is light blue "puffing" fastened with a large pearl. +He wears light-yellow chamois gloves, white shoes, a small, stiff +English straw hat with blue-and-white ribbon. When he speaks it is with +a strong "English accent," which he sometimes forgets. At present he is +flushed and almost overcome with happy emotion. As he comes down the +steps MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY rushes toward him, taking both his hands.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [excitedly]. Ah, my dear Horace Granger-Simpson! Has +your sister told you? + +HORACE [radiant, but almost tearful]. She has, indeed. I assure you I'm +quite overcome. + +[MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY, dropping his hands, laughs deprecatingly, and +steps back from him.] + +Really, I assure you. + +HAWCASTLE [shaking hands with him very heartily]. My dear young friend, +not at all, not at all. + +HORACE [fanning himself with his hat and wiping his brow]. I assure you +I am, I assure you I am--it's quite overpowering--_isn't_ it? + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY. Ah, poor Monsieur Horace! + +ALMERIC. I say, don't take it that way, you know. She's very happy. + +HORACE [crossing and grasping his hand]. She's worthy of it--she's +worthy of it. I know she is. And when will it be? + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY. Enchanting. + +HAWCASTLE. Oh, the date? I dare say within a year--two years-- + +[COMTESSE starts to exclaim, but HAWCASTLE checks her.] + +HORACE. Oh, but I say, you know! Isn't that putting it jolly far off? +The thing's settled, isn't it? Why not say a month instead of a year? + +HAWCASTLE. Oh, if you like, I don't know that there is any real +objection. + +HORACE. I do like, indeed. Why not let them marry here in Italy? + +HAWCASTLE. Ah, the dashing methods of you Americans! Next you'll be +saying, "Why not here at Sorrento?" + +HORACE. Well, and why not, indeed? + +HAWCASTLE. And then it will be, "Why not within a fortnight?" + +HORACE. And why should it not be in a fortnight? + +HAWCASTLE. Ah, you wonderful people, you are whirlwinds, yet I see no +reason why it should not be in a fortnight. + +ALMERIC [passively]. Just as you like, Governor, just as you like. + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY. Enchanting. + +HAWCASTLE. My son is all impatience! + +ALMERIC [genially]. Quite so! + +HAWCASTLE [gayly]. Shall we dispose at once of the necessary little +details, the various minor arrangements, the--the settlement? + +[Interrupts himself with a friendly laugh.] + +Of course, as a man of the world, of _our_ world, you understand there +_are_ formalities in the nature of a settlement. + +HORACE [interrupting eagerly and pleasantly, laughing also]. Quite so, +of course, I know, certainly, perfectly! + +HAWCASTLE [heartily]. We'll have no difficulty about _that_, my boy. +I'll wire my solicitor immediately, and he'll be here within two days. +If you wish to consult your own solicitor you can cable him. + +HORACE [with some embarrassment]. Fact is, I've a notion our +solicitor--Ethel's man of business, that is--from Kokomo, Indiana, where +our Governor lived--in fact, a sort of guardian of hers--may be here +almost any time. + +HAWCASTLE [taken aback]. A sort of guardian--_what_ sort? + +HORACE [apologetically]. I really can't say. Never saw him that I know +of. You see, we've been on this side so many years, and there's been no +occasion for this fellow to look us up, but he's never opposed anything +Ethel wrote for; he seems to be an easygoing old chap. + +HAWCASTLE [anxiously]. But would his consent to your sister's +marriage--or the matter of a settlement--be a necessity? + +HORACE [easily]. Oh, I dare say; but if he has the slightest sense of +duty toward my sister, he'll be the first to welcome the alliance, won't +he? + +HAWCASTLE [reassured]. Then when my solicitor comes, he and your man can +have an evening over a lot of musty papers and the thing will be done. +Again, my boy [taking HORACE'S hand], I welcome you to our family. God +bless you! + +HORACE. I'm overpowered, you know--really overpowered. + +[Fans himself again and wipes his forehead.] + +HAWCASTLE. Come, Almeric. + +[Aside to MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY, whom he joins for a moment.] + +Let him know it's a hundred and fifty thousand pounds. + +[Exit into hotel, followed immediately by ALMERIC.] + +[HORACE turns toward MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY; she gives him both hands.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [smiling]. My friend, I am happy for you. + +HORACE [joyously]. Think of it, at the most a fortnight, and dear old +Ethel will be the Honorable Mrs. St. Aubyn, future Countess of +Hawcastle! + +[MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY, lightly, at the same time withdrawing her hands +and picking up her parasol from the chair where she has left it.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY. Yes, there is but those little arrangement over the +settlement paper between your advocate and Lord Hawcastle's; but you +Americans--you laugh at such things. You are big, so big, like your +country! + +HORACE. Ah, believe me, the great world, the world of yourself, +Countess, has thoroughly alienated me. + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [coming close to him, looking at him admiringly]. +Ah, you retain one quality! You are big, you are careless, you are +free. + +[She lays her right hand on his left arm. He takes her hand with his +right hand. They stand facing each other.] + +HORACE [smiling]. Well, perhaps, in _those_ things I am American, but in +others I fancy I should be thought something else, shouldn't I? + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [earnestly]. You are a debonair man of the great +world; and yet you are still American, in that you are ab-om-i-nab-ly +rich. [She laughs sweetly.] The settlement--Such matter as that, over +which a Frenchman, an Italian, an Englishman might hesitate, you laugh! +Such matter as one-hundred-fifty thousand pounds--you set it aside; you +laugh! You say, "Oh yes--take it!" + +HORACE [his eyes wide with surprise]. A hundred and fifty thousand +pounds! Why, that's seven hundred and fifty thous--[He pauses, then +finishes decidedly.] She couldn't use the money to better advantage. + +[Enter ETHEL from the hotel. She has one thick book under her arm, +another in her hand.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [to HORACE, with deep admiration]. My friend, how +wise you are! + +[She perceives ETHEL'S entrance over HORACE'S shoulder, and at once runs +to her, embraces her, and kisses her, crying.] + +Largesse, sweet Countess of Hawcastle! Largesse! and au revoir! Adieu! I +leave you with your dear brother. A rivederci. + +[She runs gayly out, waving her parasol to them as she goes.] + +HORACE [going to ETHEL]. Dear old sis, dear old pal! + +[Affectionately gives her hand a squeeze and drops it.] + +ETHEL [radiant]. Isn't it glorious, Hoddy! + +HORACE. The others are almost as pleased as we are. + +[He leans back in chair, knees crossed, hands clasped over knees, and +regards her proudly.] + +ETHEL [opens the books she carries, laying them on one of the +tea-tables]. This is Burke's _Peerage_, and this is Froissart's +_Chronicles_. I've been reading it all over again--the St. Aubyns at +Crecy and Agincourt [with an exalted expression], and St. Aubyn will be +_my_ name! + +HORACE [smiling]. They want it to be your name _soon_, sis. + +ETHEL [suddenly thoughtful, speaks appealingly]. _You're_ fond of +Almeric, aren't you, Hoddy--_you_ admire him, don't you? + +HORACE. Certainly. Think of all he represents. + +ETHEL [enthusiastically]. Ah, yes! Crusader's blood flows in his veins. +It is to the nobility that _must_ be within him that I have plighted my +troth. I am ready to marry him when they wish. + +HORACE. Then as soon as the settlement is arranged. It'll take about all +your share of the estate, sis, but it's worth it--a hundred and fifty +thousand pounds. + +ETHEL [earnestly]. What better use could be made of a fortune than to +maintain the state and high condition of so ancient a house? + +HORACE. Doesn't it seem impossible that we were born in Indiana! + +[He speaks seriously, as if the thing were incredible.] + +ETHEL [smiling]. But isn't it good that the pater "made his pile," as +the Americans say, and let us come over here when we were young to find +the nobler things, Hoddy--the _nobler_ things! + +HORACE. The nobler things--the nobler things, sis. When old Hawcastle +dies I'll be saying, quite off-hand, you know, "My sister, the Countess +of Hawcastle--" + +ETHEL [thoughtfully]. You don't suppose that father's friend, my +guardian, this old Mr. Pike, will be--will be QUEER, do you? + +HORACE. Well, the governor himself was rather _raw_, you know. This is +probably a harmless enough old chap--easy to handle-- + +ETHEL. I wish I knew. I shouldn't like Almeric's family to think we had +queer connections of any sort--and he might turn out to be quite +shockingly American [with genuine pathos]. I--I couldn't bear it, Hoddy. + +HORACE. Then keep him out of the way. That's simple enough. None of +them, except the solicitor, need see him. + +[Instantly upon this there is a tremendous though distant commotion +beyond the hotel--wild laughter and cheers, the tarantella played by +mandolins and guitars, also sung, shouts of "Bravo Americano!" and +"Yanka Dooda!" The noise continues and increases gradually.] + +ETHEL [as the uproar begins]. What is that? + +HORACE. Must be a mob. + +[LADY CREECH, flustered and hot, enters from the hotel. She is a +haughty, cross-looking woman in the sixties.] + +ETHEL [going to LADY CREECH, speaks close to her ear and loudly]. Lady +Creech--dear Lady Creech--what is the trouble? + +LADY CREECH. Some horrible people coming to this hotel! They've made a +riot in the village. + +[The noise becomes suddenly louder. MARIANO, immediately upon LADY +CREECH'S entrance, appears in hotel doors, makes a quick gesture toward +breakfast-table, and withdraws.] + +[MICHELE, laughing, immediately enters by same doors, goes rapidly to +the breakfast-table and clears it. The others pay no attention to this.] + +HORACE [at steps up left]. It's not a riot--it's a revolution. + +LADY CREECH [sinking into a chair, angrily]. One of your horrid +fellow-countrymen, my dear. Your Americans are really too-- + +ETHEL [proudly]. Not _my_ Americans, Lady Creech! + +HORACE. Not _ours_, you know. One could hardly say that, _could_ one? + +ALMERIC [heard outside laughing]. Oh, I say, what a go! [Enters from the +hotel, laughing.] Motor-car breaks down on the way here; one of the +Johnnies in it, a German, discharges the chauffeur; and the other Johnny +[he throws himself sprawling into a chair], one of your Yankee chaps, +Ethel, hires two silly little donkeys, like rabbits, you know, to pull +the machine the rest of the way here. Then as they can't make it, by +Jove, you know, he puts himself in the straps with the donkeys, and +proceeds, attended by the populace. Ha, ha! I say! + +[HORACE, gloomy, comes down and sits at tea-table.] + +LADY CREECH [angrily, to ALMERIC]. Don't mumble your words, Almeric. I +never understand people when they mumble their words. + +[RIBIERE, who looks anxious, appears in the hotel doorway, then stands +aside on the stoop for MARIANO and MICHELE; they enter and pass him with +trays, fresh cloth, etc., for table down right, which they rapidly +proceed to set. A valet de chambre enters up left, following them +immediately. He carries a tray with a silver dish of caviar and a +bottle of vodka. As he enters he hesitates for one moment, looking +inquiringly at RIBIERE, who motions him quickly toward MARIANO and +MICHELE, and withdraws. Valet rapidly crosses right to table, sets +caviar and vodka on the table, and exits up left. The others pay no +attention to any of this.] + +ALMERIC. I went up to this Yankee chap, I mean to say--he was pullin' +and tuggin' along, you see, don't you?--and I said, "There you are, +three of you all in a row, _aren't_ you?"--meanin' him and the two +donkeys, Ethel, you see. + +LADY CREECH [who has been leaning close to ALMERIC to listen]. Dreadful +person! + +ALMERIC [continuing]. All he could answer was that he'd picked the best +company in sight. + +ETHEL [annoyed, half under her breath]. Impertinent! + +ALMERIC. No meanin' to it. I had him, you know, I rather think, didn't +I? + +[HAWCASTLE enters with MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY, a number of folded +newspapers under his arm. Simultaneously loud cheers are heard from the +village and a general renewal of the commotion.] + +HAWCASTLE. Disgusting uproar! + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [to ETHEL]. But we know that such Americans are not +of your class, cherie. + +ETHEL. A dreadful person, I quite fear. + +HAWCASTLE. The English papers. + +[Lays papers on one of the tea-tables.] + +ALMERIC. I'll take the _Pink 'Un_, Governor. I'm off. + +[Starts to go, the _Pink 'Un_ under his arm.] + +ETHEL [rather shyly]. For a stroll, Almeric? Would you like me to go +with you? + +ALMERIC [somewhat embarrassed]. Well, I rather thought I'd have a quiet +bit of readin', you know. + +ETHEL [coldly]. Oh! + +[Exit ALMERIC rapidly up left.] + +LADY CREECH [in a deep and gloomy voice]. The _Church Register_! + +[HAWCASTLE gives her a paper. HORACE takes the London _Mail_. HAWCASTLE +takes the _Times_.] + +[ETHEL and MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY walk back to the terrace railing, +chatting. The others seat themselves about the tea-tables to read.] + +HORACE [unfolding his paper, speaks crossly to MARIANO]. Mariano, how +long is this noise to continue? + +MARIANO [distractedly]. How can I know? We can do nothing. + +MICHELE [smilingly, looking up from table where he has continued to +work]. The people outside will not go while they think there is once +more a chance to see the North American who pull the automobile with +those donkeys. + +MARIANO. He have confuse' me; he have confuse' everybody. He will not be +content with the dejeuner till he have the ham and the eggs. And he will +have the eggs cooked only on one side, and how in the name of heaven can +we tell which side? + +RIBIERE [appearing in the hotel doorway, speaks sharply but not loudly]. +Garcon! + +[MICHELE and MARIANO instantly step back from table and stand at +attention, facing front, like soldiers. RIBIERE exits quickly again into +hotel.] + +HAWCASTLE [looking up from paper]. Upon my soul, who's all this? + +MARIANO [not turning his head, replies in an awed undertone]. It is Herr +von Groellerhagen, a German gentleman, Milor'. + +HAWCASTLE [amused, to HORACE]. Man that owned the automobile. Probably +made a fortune in sausages. + +VASILI [heard within the hotel, approaching]. Nein, nein, Ribiere! 'S +macht nichts! + +[He enters from the hotel. He is a portly man of forty-five, but rather +soldierly than fat. His hair, pompadour, is reddish blond, beginning to +turn gray, like his mustache and large full beard; the latter somewhat +"Henry IV." and slightly forked at bottom. His dress produces the effect +rather of carelessness than of extreme fashion. He wears a +travelling-suit of gray, neat enough but not freshly pressed, the +trousers showing no crease, the coat cut in "walking-coat style," with +big, slanting pockets, in which he carries his gloves, handkerchief, +matches, and a silver cigarette-case full of Russian cigarettes. On his +head is a tan-colored automobile cap with buttoned flaps. He is followed +by RIBIERE, who, anxious and perturbed, wishes to call his attention to +the item in the Neapolitan morning paper.] + +VASILI [waving both RIBIERE and the paper aside, in high good-humor]. +Las' mich, las' mich! Geh'n sie weg! + +[RIBIERE bows submissively, though with a gesture of protest, and exit +into the hotel. The group about the tea-table watch VASILI with +hostility.] + +LADY CREECH. What a dreadful person! + +[VASILI crosses to his seat at the breakfast-table in front of MARIANO +and MICHELE, who bows profoundly as he passes.] + +VASILI [lifting his hand in curt, semi-military salute, to acknowledge +the waiters' bows]. See to my American friend. + +[MICHELE immediately hastens into the hotel. VASILI sits, and MARIANO +serves him.] + +HAWCASTLE [to LADY CREECH, in her ear]. Quite right; but take care, he +speaks English. + +LADY CREECH [glaring at VASILI]. Many thoroughly objectionable persons +do! + +VASILI [apparently oblivious to her remark, to MARIANO]. My American +friend wishes his own national dish. + +MARIANO [deferentially, and serving VASILI to caviar]. Yes, Herr von +Groellerhagen, he will have the eggs on but one of both sides and the +hams fried. So he go to cook it himself. + +[Loud shouts and wild laughter from the street. HORACE, ALMERIC, and +LADY CREECH set their papers down in their laps and turn toward the +door.] + +MARIANO. Ha! He return from the kitchen with those national dish. + +ETHEL [glancing in the doorway]. How horrid! + +[MICHELE backs out on the stoop from the doorway laughing, carrying a +platter of ham and eggs.] + +MICHELE. He have gone to wash himself at the street fountain. + +[Tumult outside reaches its height, the shouts of "Yanka Dooda!" +predominating.] + +VASILI [laughing, clapping his hands]. Bravo! Bravo! + +ETHEL. Horrible! + +[PIKE enters from the hotel. He is a youthful-looking American of about +thirty-five, good-natured, shrewd, humorous, and kindly. His voice has +the homely quality of the Central States, clear, quiet, and strong, with +a very slight drawl at times when the situation strikes him as humorous, +often exhibiting an apologetic character. He does not speak a dialect. +His English is the United States language as spoken by the average +citizen to be met on a daycoach anywhere in the Central States. He is +clean-shaven, and his hair, which shows a slight tendency to gray, is +neatly parted on the left side. His light straw hat is edged with a +strip of ribbon. The hat, like the rest of his apparel, is neither new +nor old. His shirt, "lay-down" collar, and cuffs are of white, +well-laundered linen. He wears a loosely knotted tie. A linen +motor-duster extends to his knees. His waistcoat is of a gray mixture, +neither dark nor light. His trousers are of the same material and not +fashionably cut, yet they fit him well and are neither baggy at the +knees nor "high-water." His shoes are plain black Congress gaiters and +show a "good shine." In brief, he is just the average well-to-do but +untravelled citizen that you might meet on an accommodation train +between Logansport and Kokomo, Indiana. As he enters he is wiping his +face, after his ablutions, with a large towel, his hat pushed far back +on his head. The sleeves of his duster are turned back, and his +detachable cuffs are in his pocket. He comes through the doors rubbing +his face with the towel, but, pausing for a moment on the stoop, drops +the towel from his face to dry his hands. All except VASILI and the +waiters stare at him with frowns of annoyance.] + +PIKE [beamingly unconscious of this, surprised, and in a tone of +cheerful apology, believing all the world to be as good-natured and +sensible as Kokomo would be under the circumstances]. Law! I didn't know +there was folks here. I reckon you'll have to excuse me. + +[As he speaks he dries his hands quickly.] + +Here, son! + +[He hands the towel to MICHELE. PIKE rapidly descends the steps, goes to +the breakfast-table, joining VASILI and taking the seat opposite him.] + +VASILI [gayly]. You're a true patriot, my friend. You allow no profane +hand to cook your national dish. I trust you will be as successful with +that wicked motor of mine. + +PIKE [chuckling]. Lord bless your soul, I've put a self-binder together +after a pony-engine had butted it half-way through a brick deepoe! + +[Tucks his napkin in collar of his waistcoat and applies himself to the +meal.] + +[HORACE and HAWCASTLE read their papers, now and then casting glances of +great annoyance at PIKE.] + +[LADY CREECH lets her periodical rest in her lap, and without any +abating or concealment, fixes PIKE with a basilisk glare which +continues. He is unconscious of all this, his back being three-quarters +to their group.] + +VASILI [no pause]. You have studied mechanics at the University? + +PIKE [smiling]. University? Law, no! On the old man's farm. + +[VASILI nods gravely.] + +HAWCASTLE [blandly, to HORACE]. Without any disrespect to you, my dear +fellow, what terrific bounders most of your fellow-countrymen are! + +HORACE [greatly irritated]. Do you wonder sis and I have emancipated +ourselves? + +HAWCASTLE. Not at all, my dear lad. + +VASILI [to PIKE]. Can I persuade you to accept a little of one of my own +national dishes--caviar? + +PIKE. Caviar? I've heard of it. I thought it was Rooshian. + +VASILI [disturbed, but instantly recovering, himself]. It is German, +also. Will you not? + +[He motions MARIANO to serve PIKE. MARIANO places a spoonful of caviar +on a silver dish at PIKE'S right.] + +PIKE. I expect I'd never get to the legislature again if the boys heard +about it. Still, I reckon I'm far enough from home to take a _few_ +risks. + +[He loads a fork with caviar, and with a smile places it in his mouth. +The smile slowly fades, his face becomes thoughtful, then grave; he +slowly sets the fork upon his plate, his eyes turn toward VASILI with a +look both puzzled and plaintive, his mouth firmly closed, his jaw moving +slightly.] + +VASILI. I fear you do not like it. A few swallows of vodka will take +away the taste. + +[Gives him a glass, which PIKE accepts, drinking a mouthful in haste, +VASILI watching him, sincerely concerned and troubled. PIKE swallows the +vodka, quietly sets the glass down on the table, his eyelids begin to +flutter, he bends a look of suffering and distrust upon VASILI, slowly +rises and closes his eyes, then slowly sits and opens them. Gradually a +faint, distrustful smile appears on his face.] + +PIKE [in the voice of a convalescent]. I never had any business to leave +Indiana! + +VASILI. I am sorry, my friend. + +[PIKE takes another large forkful of caviar.] + +VASILI [observing this]. But I thought you did not like the caviar? + +PIKE. It's to take away the taste of the vodka. + +VASILI [laughing]. I lift my hat to you. + +PIKE. You never worked on a farm in your own country, Doc? + +VASILI. That has been denied me. + +PIKE. I expect so. Talk about things to drink! Harvest-time, and the +women folks coming out from the house with a two-gallon jug of ice-cold +buttermilk! + +[Sets down the glass and whistles softly with delight.] + +[HORACE shows increasing signs of annoyance.] + +VASILI. You still enjoy those delights? + +PIKE. Not since I moved up to our county-seat ten years ago and began to +practice law. Things don't taste the same in the city. + +VASILI. You do not like your city? + +PIKE [not with braggadocio, but earnestly, almost pathetically]. Like +it? Well, sir, for public buildings and architecture, I wouldn't trade +our State insane asylum for the worst-ruined ruin in Europe--not for +hygiene and real comfort. + +VASILI. And your people? + +PIKE. The best on earth. Out _my_ way folks are neighbors. + +[HORACE snaps his paper sharply.] + +VASILI. But you have no leisure class. + +[VASILI is looking keenly at HAWCASTLE and HORACE as he speaks.] + +PIKE. Got a pretty good-sized colored population. + +VASILI. I mean no aristocracy--no great old families such as we have, +that go back and back to the Middle Ages. + +PIKE [genially]. Well, I expect if they go back that far they might just +as well set down and stay there. No, sir, the poor in my country don't +have to pay taxes for a lot of useless kings and earls and first grooms +of the bedchamber and second ladies in waiting, and I don't know what +all. If anybody wants _our_ money for nothin' he has to show energy +enough to steal it. I wonder a man like you doesn't emigrate. + +VASILI. Bravo! + +HAWCASTLE [to HORACE]. Your countryman seems to be rather down on us! + +HORACE. This fellow is distinctly of the lower orders. We should cut him +as completely in the States as here. + +VASILI. I wonder you make this long journey, my friend, instead of to +spend your holiday at home. + +PIKE. Holiday! Why, _I_ never had time even to go to Niagara Falls! + +VASILI [to MARIANO]. Finito! + +[Sets his napkin carelessly on table and lights a Russian cigarette.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY. What is it he does with his serviette? + +PIKE [moving his chair back from the table slightly, and folding his +napkin]. No, _sir_, you wouldn't catch me puttin' in any time in these +old kingdoms unless I had to. + +LADY CREECH [loudly, to HAWCASTLE]. Hawcastle, can you tell me how much +longer these persons intend to remain here listening to our +conversation? + +[PIKE half turns to LADY CREECH, innocently puzzled.] + +HAWCASTLE. Oh, it isn't that; but it's somewhat annoying not to be +allowed to read one's paper in peace. + +HORACE. Quite beastly annoying! + +LADY CREECH. I had a distinct impression that the management had +reserved this terrace for our party. + +VASILI [quietly]. I fear we have disturbed these good people. + +PIKE [in wonder]. Do you think they're hinting at us? + +VASILI. I fear so. + +PIKE [gently and with sincere amazement]. Why, _we_ haven't done +anything to 'em. + +VASILI. No, my friend. + +PIKE [smiling]. Well, I guess there ain't any bones broken. + +HORACE [throws down paper angrily on tea-table]. I can't stand this. I +shall go for a stroll. + +PIKE [rising]. I expect it's about time for me to go and find the two +young folks I've come to look after. + +VASILI. You are here for a duty, then? + +PIKE [with gravity, yet smiling faintly]. I shouldn't be surprised if +that was the name for it. Yes, sir, all the way from Indiana. + +[ETHEL utters a low cry of fear.] + +[HORACE, having secured his hat, is just rising to go, drops back into +his chair with a stifled exclamation of dismay.] + +[HAWCASTLE lays his paper flat on table. All this instantaneous.] + +HAWCASTLE. By Jove! + +[They all stare at PIKE.] + +PIKE [continuing]. I expect, prob'ly, Doc, I won't be able to eat with +you this evening. You see--[he pauses, somewhat embarrassed]--you see, +I've come a mighty long ways to look after her, and she, prob'ly--that +is, _they'll_ prob'ly want me to have supper with _them_. + +[The latter part of this speech is spoken rather breathlessly, though +not rapidly, and almost tremulously, and with a growing smile that is +like a confession.] + +VASILI. Do not trouble for me. Your young people, they have a villa? + +PIKE. No; they're right here in this hotel. + +HORACE. I must get away! + +[He says this huskily, almost in a whisper, as if to himself. His face +is tense with anxiety.] + +VASILI [with a gesture of dismissal, though graciously]. Seek them. I +finish my cigarette. + +PIKE. Guess I better ask. + +[HORACE is crossing, meaning to get away through the grove.] + +PIKE [addressing him]. Hey, there! Can you-- + +[HORACE, proceeding, pays no attention.] + +PIKE [lifting his voice]. Excuse me, son, ain't you an American? + +[More decidedly, to MARIANO.] + +Waiter, tell that gentleman I'm speaking to him. + +MARIANO [to HORACE]. M'sieu', that gentleman speak with you. + +HORACE [agitated and angry]. What gentleman? + +[MARIANO bows toward PIKE.] + +PIKE [at same time genially]. I thought from your looks you must be an +American. + +HORACE [turning haughtily]. Are you speaking to _me_? + +PIKE [good-humoredly]. Well, I shouldn't be surprised. Ain't you an +American? + +HORACE. I happen to have been born in the States. + +PIKE [amiably]. Well, that _was_ luck! + +HORACE [turning as if to go]. Will you kindly excuse me? + +PIKE. Hold on a minute! I'm looking for some Americans here, and I +expect you know 'em--boy and girl named Simpson. + +HORACE. Is there any possibility that you mean Granger-Simpson? + +[His tone is both alarmed and truculent.] + +PIKE [much pleased]. No, sir; just plain Simpson. Granger's their middle +name. That's for old Jed Granger, grandfather on their ma's side. + +[He pronounces "ma" with the broad Hoosier accent--"maw."] + +I want to see 'em both, but it's the girl I'm rilly looking for. + +HORACE [trembling, but speaking even more haughtily]. Will you be good +enough to state any possible reason why Miss Granger-Simpson should see +you? + +PIKE [in profound surprise, yet mildly]. Reason--why, yes--I'm her +guardian. + +[ETHEL lifts her hand to her forehead as if dizzy. MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY +puts an arm around her. ETHEL recovers herself and stands rigidly, +staring at PIKE.] + +HORACE [staggered]. What! + +PIKE [smiling]. Yes, sir, Daniel Voorhees Pike, attorney at law, Kokomo, +Indiana. + +[HORACE falls back from him in horror.] + +[HAWCASTLE, excited but cool, makes a quick, imperative gesture to LADY +CREECH, who majestically sweeps up to ETHEL, kisses her on the forehead +in lofty pity, and sweeps out.] + +[MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY kisses ETHEL compassionately on cheek and follows +LADY CREECH off.] + +[MARIANO and MICHELE, having cleared the table, exeunt.] + +HORACE [hoarse with shame, to PIKE; slight pause after PIKE'S last +speech.] I shall ask her if she will consent to an interview. + +PIKE [at same time, astounded]. "Consent to an interview"? Why, I want +to _talk_ to her! + +HAWCASTLE [quickly and earnestly to ETHEL]. This shall make no +difference to _us_, my child. Speak to him at once. + +[Exit into the hotel.] + +PIKE [to HORACE]. Don't you understand? I'm her _guardian_. + +HORACE [with a desperate gesture]. I shall never hold up my head again! + +[Rushes off.] + +VASILI [gravely, to PIKE]. When you have finished your affairs, my +friend, remember my poor car yonder. + +[Illustration: "YES, SIR, DANIEL VOORHEES PIKE, ATTORNEY AT LAW, KOKOMO, +INDIANA"] + +PIKE [with a melancholy smile]. All right, Doc, I'm kind of confused +just now, but I reckon I can still put a plug back in a gear-box. + +VASILI [at same time]. Then _au revoir_, my friend. + +[Strolls off through the grove.] + +PIKE [watching him go, thoughtfully]. Yes, _sir_! + +ETHEL [haughtily, yet with the air of confessing a humiliating truth, +her eyes cast down]. I am Miss Granger-Simpson. + +[As she speaks he turns and lifts his hand toward her as if suddenly +startled. He has not seen her until now. He stands for a moment in +silence, looking at her with great tenderness and pride.] + +PIKE [with both wonder and pathos in his voice]. Why, I knew your pa +from the time I was a little boy till he died, and I looked up to him +more'n I ever looked up to anybody in my life, but I never thought he'd +have a girl like you! + +[She turns from him; he takes a short step nearer her.] + +He'd 'a' been mighty proud if he could see you now. + +ETHEL [quickly, and with controlled agitation]. Perhaps it will be as +well if we avoid personal allusions. + +PIKE [mildly]. I don't see how that's possible. + +ETHEL [sitting]. Will you please sit down? + +PIKE. Yes, ma'am! + +[ETHEL shivers at the "ma'am."] + +[He sits in the chair which HORACE has occupied, still holding his hat +in his hand.] + +ETHEL [tremulously, her eyes cast down]. As you know, I--I-- + +[She stops, as if afraid of breaking down; then, turning toward him, +cries sharply.] + +Oh, are you _really_ my guardian? + +PIKE [smiling]. Well, I've got the papers in my grip. I expect-- + +ETHEL. Oh, I KNOW it! It is only that we didn't fancy, we didn't +expect-- + +PIKE. I expect you thought I'd be considerable older. + +ETHEL. Not only _that_-- + +PIKE [interrupting gently]. I expect you thought I'd neglected you a +good deal [remorsefully], and it _did_ LOOK like it--never comin' to see +you; but I couldn't hardly manage the time to get away. You see, bein' +trustee of your share of the estate, I don't hardly have a fair show at +my law practice. But when I got your letter, eleven days ago, I says to +myself: "Here, Daniel Voorhees Pike, you old shellback, you've just got +to _take_ time. John Simpson trusted you with his property, and he's +done more [his voice rises, but his tone is affectionate and shows deep +feeling]--he's trusted you to look out for _her_, and now she's come to +a kind of jumpin'-off place in her life--she's thinking of gettin' +married; and you just pack your grip-sack and hike out over there and +stand _by_ her!" + +ETHEL [frigidly]. I quite fail to understand your point of view. Perhaps +I had best make it at once clear to you that I am no longer _thinking_ +of marrying. + +PIKE [leaning back in his chair and smiling on her]. Well, Lord-a-Mercy! + +ETHEL. I mean I have decided upon it. The ceremony is to take place +within a fortnight. + +PIKE. Well, I declare! + +ETHEL. We shall dispense with all delays. + +PIKE [slowly and a little sadly]. Well, I don't know as I could rightly +say anything against that. He must be a mighty nice fellow, and you must +think a heap _of_ him! + +[With a suppressed sigh.] + +That's the way it should be. + +[He smiles again and leans toward her in a friendly way.] + +And you're happy, are you? + +ETHEL [with cold emphasis, sitting very straight in her chair]. +Distinctly! + +[PIKE'S expression becomes puzzled, he passes his hand over his chin, +looks at her keenly. Then his eyes turn to the spot where HORACE stood +during their interview, and he starts, as though shocked at a sudden +thought.] + +PIKE. It ain't that fellow I was talkin' to yonder? + +ETHEL [indignantly]. That was my _brother_! + +PIKE [relieved, but somewhat embarrassed]. Lord-a-Mercy! + +[Recovering himself immediately and smiling.] + +But, naturally, I wouldn't remember him. He couldn't have been more than +twelve years old last time you were home. Of course, I'd 'a' known +_you_-- + +ETHEL. How? You couldn't have seen me since I was a child. + +PIKE. From your picture. Though now I see--it _ain't_ so much like you. + +ETHEL. You have a photograph of _me_? + +PIKE [very gently]. The last time I saw your father alive he gave me +one. + +ETHEL [frowning]. _Gave_ it to you? + +PIKE. Gave it to me to look at. + +ETHEL. And you remembered-- + +PIKE [apologetically]. Yes, ma'am! + +ETHEL [incredulously]. Remembered well enough to _know_ me? + +PIKE. Yes, ma'am! + +ETHEL. It does not strike me as possible. We may dismiss the subject. + +PIKE. Well, if you'd like to introduce me to your [laughing feebly and +tentatively, hesitates]--to your-- + +ETHEL. To my brother? + +PIKE. No, ma'am; I mean to your--to the young man. + +ETHEL. To Mr. St. Aubyn? I think it quite unnecessary. + +PIKE. I'm afraid I can't see it just that way [with an apologetic +laugh]. I'll _have_ to have a couple of talks with him--sort of look him +over, so to speak. I won't stay around here spoilin' your fun any longer +than I can help. Only just for that, and to get a letter I'm expectin' +here from England. Don't you be afraid. + +ETHEL. I do not see that you need have come at all. [Her lip begins to +tremble.] We could have been spared this mortification. + +PIKE [sadly]. You mean _I_ mortify you? Why, I--I can't see how. + +ETHEL. In a hundred ways--every way. That common person who is with +you-- + +PIKE [gently]. _He_ ain't common. You only think so because he's with +_me_. + +ETHEL [sharply]. Who is he? + +PIKE. He told me his name, but I can't remember it. I call him "Doc." + +ETHEL. It doesn't _matter_! What _does_ matter is that you needn't have +come. You could have _written_ your consent. + +PIKE [mildly]. Not without seeing the young man. + +ETHEL. And you could have arranged the settlement in the same way. + +PIKE [smiling]. Settlement? You seem to have _settled_ it pretty well +without me. + +ETHEL. You do not understand. An alliance of this sort always entails a +certain settlement. + +PIKE. Yes, ma'am--when folks get married they generally settle down +considerable. + +ETHEL [impatiently]. Please listen. If you were at all a man of the +world, I should not have to explain that in marrying into a noble house +I bring my _dot_, my dowry-- + +PIKE [puzzled]. _Money_, you mean? + +ETHEL. If you choose to put it that way. + +PIKE. You mean you want to put aside something of your own to buy a lot +and fix up a place to start housekeeping-- + +ETHEL. No, _no_! I mean a settlement upon Mr. St. Aubyn directly. + +PIKE. You mean you want to _give_ it to him? + +ETHEL. If that's the only way to make you understand--_yes_! + +PIKE [amused]. How much do you want to give him? + +ETHEL [coldly]. A hundred and fifty thousand pounds. + +PIKE [incredulously]. Seven hundred and fifty thousand dollars! + +ETHEL. _Precisely_ that! + +PIKE [amazed]. Well, he _has_ made you care for him! I guess he must be +the Prince of the World, honey! He must be a great man. I expect you're +right about me not meetin' _him_! I prob'ly wouldn't stack up very high +alongside of a man that's big enough for you to think as much of as you +do of him. [Smiling.] Why, I'd have to squeeze every bit of property +your pa left you. + +ETHEL. Is it _your_ property? + +PIKE [gently]. I've worked pretty hard to take care of it for you. + +ETHEL [rising impulsively and coming to him]. Forgive me for saying +that. + +PIKE [smiling]. Pshaw! + +ETHEL. It was unworthy of me, unworthy of the higher and nobler things +that life calls me to live up to [proudly]--that I _shall_ live up to. +The money means nothing to me--I am not thinking of that. It is merely a +necessary form. + +PIKE. Have you talked with Mr. St. Aubyn about this settlement--this +present you want to make him? + +ETHEL. Not with him. + +PIKE [amused]. I thought not! You'll see--he wouldn't take it if I'd let +you give it to him. A fine man like that wants to make his own way, of +course. Mighty few men like to have fun poked at 'em about livin' on +their wife's money. + +ETHEL [despairingly]. Oh, I _can't_ make you understand! A settlement +isn't a gift. + +PIKE [as if humoring her]. How'd you happen to decide that just a +hundred and fifty thousand pounds was what you wanted to give him? + +ETHEL. It was Mr. St. Aubyn's father who fixed the amount. + +PIKE. His _father_? What's _he_ got to do with it? + +ETHEL. He is the Earl of Hawcastle, the head of the ancient house. + +PIKE. And he asks you for your property--asks you for it in so many +words? + +ETHEL. As a _settlement_! + +PIKE [aghast]. And your young man _knows_ it? + +ETHEL. I tell you I have not discussed it with Mr. St. Aubyn. + +PIKE [emphatically]. I reckon not! Well, sir, do you know what's the +first thing Mr. St. Aubyn will do when he hears his father's made such a +proposition to you? He'll take the old man out in the back lot and give +him a thrashing he won't forget to the day of his death! + +[The roll of drums is heard, distant, as if sounding below the cliff; +bugle sounds at the same time.] + +[MARIANO and MICHELE run hurriedly from the hotel and lean over +balustrade at back, as if watching something below the cliff.] + +[RIBIERE enters quickly with them, takes one quick glance in same +direction, and hurries off.] + +[PIKE and ETHEL, surprised, turn to look.] + +MARIANO [calling to ETHEL as he enters]. A bandit of Russia, +Mademoiselle! The soldiers think he hide in a grotto under the cliff! + +[ALMERIC comes on rapidly from the hotel, carrying a shot-gun.] + +ALMERIC [enthusiastically, as he enters]. Oh, I _say_, fair sport, by +Jove! Fair sport! + +PIKE [to ETHEL, indicating ALMERIC, chuckling]. I saw _him_ on the road +here--what's he meant for? + +ALMERIC. Think I'll have a chance to pot the beggar, Michele? + +[He joins MICHELE at balustrade.] + +MICHELE. No, Signore, there are two companies of carabiniere. + +[PIKE, delighted, chuckles aloud.] + +ETHEL [angry, calling]. Almeric! + +ALMERIC [turning]. Hallo! + +ETHEL [frigidly]. I wish to present my guardian to you. [To PIKE.] +_This_ is Mr. St. Aubyn. + +[Illustration: _THIS_ IS MR. ST. AUBYN] + +ALMERIC [coming down]. Hallo, though! It's the donkey man, isn't it? How +very odd! You'll have to see the Governor and our solicitor about the +settlement. I've some important business here. The police are chasing a +bally convict chap under the cliffs over yonder, so you'll have to +excuse me. I'll have to be toddling. + +[Goes up to terrace wall overlooking cliffs.] + +You know there's nothing like a little convict shooting to break the +blooming monotony--what? + +[The bugle sounds. ALMERIC turns and rushes off.] + +Wait for me, you fellows! Don't hurt him till _I_ get there! + +[His voice dies away in the distance.] + +PIKE [turning to ETHEL with slow horror]. _Seven hundred and fifty +thousand dollars for_--How much do they charge over here for a _real_ +man? + +[She is unable to meet his eye. She turns, with flaming cheeks, and runs +into the hotel. He stands staring after her, incredulous, dumfounded, in +a frozen attitude.] + + +END OF THE FIRST ACT + + + + +THE SECOND ACT + + +Scene: Entrance garden of the hotel. + +In the distance are seen the green slopes of vineyards, a ruined castle, +and olive orchards leading up the mountainside. + +An old stone wall seven feet high runs across the rear of the stage. +This wall is almost covered with vines, showing autumn tints, crowning +the crest of the wall and hanging from it in profusion. There is a broad +green gate of the Southern Italian type, closed. A white-columned +pergola runs obliquely down from the wall on the right. The top of the +pergola is an awning formed by a skeleton of green-painted wooden strips +thickly covered by entwining lemon branches bearing ripening lemons. +Between the columns of the pergola are glimpses of a formal Italian +garden: flowers, hedges, and a broad flat marble vase on a slender +pedestal, etc. On the left a two-story wing of the hotel meets the wall +at the back and runs square across to the left; a lemon grove lies to +the left also. The wall of the hotel facing the audience shows open +double doors, with windows up-stairs and below, all with lowered +awnings. There is a marble bench at the left among shrubberies; an open +touring-car upon the right under the awning formed by the overhang of +the pergola; a bag of tools, open, on the stage near by, the floor +boards of the car removed, the apron lifted. + +As the curtain rises, PIKE, in his shirt-sleeves, his hands dirty, and +wearing a workman's long blouse buttoned at neck, is bending over the +engine, working and singing, at intervals whistling "The Blue and the +Gray." His hat, duster, and cuffs are on the rear seat of the tonneau. + +[Enter HORACE from the garden. He is flushed and angry; controls himself +with an effort, trying to speak politely.] + +HORACE. Mr. Pike! + +PIKE [apparently not hearing him, hammering at a bolt-head with a +monkey-wrench and singing]. + +"One lies down at Appomattox--" + +HORACE [sharply]. Mr. Pike! Mr. Pike, I wish a word with you. + +PIKE [looks up mildly]. Hum! + +[He moves to the other side of the engine, rubbing handle of +monkey-wrench across his chin as if puzzled.] + +HORACE. I wish to tell you that the surprise of this morning so upset me +that I went for a long walk. I have just returned. + +PIKE [regarding the machine intently, sings softly]. + +"One wore clothes of gray--." + +[Then he whistles the air. Throughout this interview he maintains almost +constantly an air of absorption in his work and continues to whistle and +sing softly.] + +HORACE [continuing]. I have been even more upset by what I have just +learned from my sister. + +PIKE [absently]. Why, that's too bad. + +HORACE. It _is_ too bad--absurdly--monstrously bad! She tells me that +she has done you the honor to present you to the family with which we +are forming an alliance--to the Earl of Hawcastle--her fiance's father-- + +PIKE [with cheerful absent-mindedness--working]. Yes, sir! + +HORACE [continuing]. To her fiance's aunt, Lady Creech-- + +PIKE. Yes, sir! the whole possetucky of them. [Singing softly.] "She was +my hanky-panky-danky from the town of Kalamazack!" Yes, sir--that French +lady, too. + +[He throws a quick, keen glance at HORACE, then instantly appears +absorbed in work again, singing,] + +"She ran away with a circus clown--she never did come back--Oh, Solomon +Levi!" + +[Continues to whistle the tune softly.] + +HORACE. And she introduced you to her fiance--to Mr. St. Aubyn himself. + +PIKE [looking up, monkey-wrench in hand]. Yes, sir [chuckles]; _we_ had +quite a talk about shootin' in Indiana; said he'd heard of Peru, in his +school history. Wanted to come out some day, he said, and asked what our +best game was. I told him we had some Incas still preserved in the +mountains of Indiana, and he said he'd like a good Inca head to put up +in his gun-room. He _ought_ to get one, _oughtn't_ he? + +[Starts to work again, busily.] + +HORACE [indignantly]. My sister informs me that in spite of Lord +Hawcastle's most graciously offering to discuss her engagement with you, +you refused. + +PIKE. Well, I didn't see any need of it. + +HORACE. Furthermore, you allege that you will decline to go into the +matter with Lord Hawcastle's solicitor. + +PIKE. What matter? + +HORACE [angrily]. The matter of the settlement. + +PIKE [quietly]. Your sister kind of let it out to me awhile ago that you +think a good deal of this French widow lady. Suppose you make up your +mind to take her for richer or poorer--what's _she_ going to give _you_? + +HORACE [roaring]. Nothing! What do you mean? + +PIKE. Well, I thought you'd probably charge her [with a slight drawl] a +_little_, anyhow. Ain't that the way over here? + +[Turns to work again, humming "Dolly Gray."] + +HORACE. It is impossible for you to understand the motives of my sister +and myself in our struggle _not_ to remain in the vulgar herd. But can't +you try to comprehend that there is an Old-World society, based not on +wealth, but on that indescribable something which comes of ancient +lineage and high birth? [With great indignation.] You presume to +interfere between us and the fine flower of Europe! + +PIKE [straightening up, but speaking quietly]. Well, I don't know as the +folks around Kokomo would ever have spoke of your father as a "fine +flower," but we thought a heap of him, and when he married your ma he +was so glad to get her--well, I never heard yet that he asked for any +_settlement_! + +HORACE. You are quite impossible. + +PIKE. The fact is, when she took him he was a poor man; but if he'd a +had seven hundred and fifty thousand dollars, I'll bet he'd 'a' given +it for her. + +[Starts to hammer vigorously, humming "Dolly Gray."] + +HORACE. There is no profit in continuing the discussion. + +[Turns on his heel, but immediately turns again toward PIKE, who is +apparently preoccupied.] + +And I warn you we shall act without paying the slightest attention to +you. [Triumphantly.] What have you to say to that, sir? + +[PIKE'S answer is conveyed by the motor-horn, which says: "Honk! Honk!" +HORACE throws up his hands despairingly. PIKE'S voice becomes audible in +the last words of the song: "Good-bye, Dolly Gray."] + +[Enter LADY CREECH and ALMERIC through the gates.] + +HORACE [meeting them]. The fellow is hopeless. + +LADY CREECH [not hearing, and speaking from habit, automatically]. +Dreadful person! + +[PIKE continues his work, paying no attention.] + +ALMERIC [to HORACE]. Better let him alone till the Governor's had time +to think a bit. Governor's clever. He'll fetch the beggar about somehow. + +LADY CREECH [with a Parthian glance at the unconscious PIKE]. I sha'h't +stop in the creature's presence--I shall go up to my room for my forty +winks. + +[Exit into the hotel.] + +ALMERIC [as she goes out]. Day-day, aunt! [To HORACE.] I'm off to look +at that pup again. You trust the Governor. + +HORACE [as ALMERIC goes]. I do, I do. It is insufferable, but I'll wait. + +[Exit into the garden.] + +[PIKE stands for a moment, contemplating the car in some despondency, +still humming or whistling.] + +[LADY CREECH, after a few moments, appears at a window in the upper +story of the hotel. Unseen by PIKE, she pulls up the awning for a better +view, and drops lace curtains inside of window so as to screen herself +from observation. Sits watching.] + +[Immediately upon HORACE'S exit MARIANO, flustered, enters hurriedly +from the hotel, goes to the gates, and fumbles with the lock. At the +same time VASILI enters from the garden, smoking.] + +VASILI. You make progress, my friend? + +PIKE. Your machine's like a good many people--got sand in its gear-box. + +VASILI [to MARIANO]. Are you locking us in? + +MARIANO [excitedly coming down and showing a big key which he has taken +from the lock]. No, Herr von Groellerhagen, I lock some one _out_--that +bandit who have not been capture. The carabiniere warn us to close all +gates for an hour. They will have that wicked one soon. There are two +companies. [In a lower tone to VASILI.] Monsieur Ribiere has much fears. + +VASILI. Monsieur Ribiere is sometimes a fool. + +MARIANO [in a hoarse whisper]. Monsieur, this convict is a Russian. + +[VASILI waves him away somewhat curtly.] + +[Exit MARIANO, shaking his head, carrying the key with him.] + +PIKE. Two companies of soldiers! A town marshal out my way would 'a' had +him yesterday. + +VASILI. My friend, you are teaching me to respect your country, not by +what you brag, but by what you do. + +PIKE. How's that. + +VASILI [significantly]. I see how a son of that great democracy can +apply himself to a dirty machine, while his eyes are full of visions of +one of its beautiful daughters. + +PIKE [slowly and sadly, peering into the machine]. Doc, there's sand in +your gear-box. + +VASILI [laughing]. So? + +PIKE. You go down to the kitchen and make signs for some of the help to +give you a nice clean bunch of rags. + +VASILI [surprised into hauteur]. What is it you ask me to do? + +PIKE. I need some more rags. + +VASILI [amused]. My friend, I obey. + +[Makes a mock-serious bow and starts.] + +PIKE. I won't leave the machine--'twouldn't be safe. + +VASILI [halting, laughs]. You fear this famous bandit would steal it? + +PIKE. No; but there's parties around here might think it was a +settlement. + +VASILI. I do not understand. + +PIKE [chuckling]. Doc, that's where we're in the same fix. + +VASILI. Weidersehn, my friend. + +[Exit into hotel.] + +[PIKE kneels on the foot-board of machine above gear-box, begins to +clean, using an old rag, singing "Sweet Genevieve." A distant shot is +heard. PIKE looks up at this, ceasing to sing. Then he continues his +work and music. LADY CREECH leans out from her window, staring off to +the right with opera-glasses. There is a noise at the gates as some one +hastily but cautiously tries to open them. PIKE looks up again, turns +toward the gates, and, after a short pause, again begins to sing and +work, but very softly.] + +[IVANOFF appears on top of the wall at back, climbing up cautiously from +lane below. He creeps from the wall to the top of pergola and cautiously +along that through the foliage to above PIKE. He peers over the foliage +at PIKE.] + +[PIKE looks up slowly, and, as slowly, stops "Sweet Genevieve," his +voice fading away on a half syllable as he encounters IVANOFF'S gaze. +They stare at each other, LADY CREECH observing unseen.] + +[IVANOFF is a thin, very fragile-looking man of thirty-eight. His +disordered hair is prematurely gray, his beard is a grizzled four days' +stubble. He is exceedingly haggard and worn, but has the face and look +of a man of refinement and cultivation. He has lost his hat; his shoes +and trousers are splashed with dried mud, and brambles cling to him here +and there. He wears a soiled white shirt and collar, and a torn black +tie, black waistcoat and trousers. He is covered with dust from head to +foot; one sleeve of his shirt has been torn off at the elbow. He wears +no coat.] + +IVANOFF [in a voice tremulous with tragic appeal]. Et ce que vous etes +un homme de bon coeur? Je ne suis pas coupable-- + +PIKE [very gravely]. There ain't any use in the world your talkin' to me +like that! + +IVANOFF [panting]. You are an Englishman? + +PIKE [quietly, rising and stepping back]. That'll do for _that._ You +come down from there! + +IVANOFF [in a voice that lifts, almost cracks, with sudden hope]. An +American? + +PIKE. They haven't made me anything else yet. + +IVANOFF [swinging himself down to the ground]. Thank God for that! + +[He leans against the car, exhausted.] + +PIKE. I do. What makes _you_ so glad about it? + +IVANOFF. Because I have suffered in the cause your own forefathers gave +their lives for. I am a Russian political fugitive, and I can go no +farther. If you give me up I shall not be taken alive. I have no weapon, +but I can find a way to cut my throat. + +PIKE [with humorous incredulity]. Are _you_ the bandit they're lookin' +for? + +IVANOFF. They call me that. Do I look like a bandit? + +PIKE. How close are they? + +IVANOFF [with despairing gesture]. There! + +PIKE. Did they see you climb that wall? + +IVANOFF. I think not. + +[There comes a loud ringing at the gates. At the sound IVANOFF starts +violently, throwing one arm up as if to shield his face from a blow.] + +IVANOFF. Oh, my God! it is they! + +[He staggers back against the machine.] + +PIKE [hastily stripping off his working blouse]. Do you know anything +about gear-box plugs? + +[The ringing continues.] + +IVANOFF. Nothing in the world. + +PIKE. Then you're a chauffeur. [Puts blouse on him.] Take a look at this +one. [With emphatic significance.] It's _underneath_ the machine. + +[Quickly sets his hands on IVANOFF'S shoulders, having forced the blouse +on him, and pushes him beneath the car.] + +MARIANO [within the hotel, calling]. Subito! Subito! Vengo, Signore! +Vengo! + +[PIKE at same time rapidly wipes his hands on a rag, puts on his hat, +cuffs, and coat, which have been lying on the seat.] + +MARIANO [running on, flustered]. Corpo de St. Costanzo! Non posso essere +dapertutto allo stesso tempo. Vengo, vengo! + +[He hastens to the gates with his key, unfastening busily. Meanwhile +PIKE lights a cigar.] + +MARIANO. Ecco! [Throws open gates and falls back in astonishment.] Dio +mio! + +[Two carabiniere, good-looking, soldierly men in the carabiniere +uniform, cocked hats, white cross-belts, etc., are disclosed, their +carbines slung over their arms, their long cloaks thrown back. Behind +the carabiniere stand some fishermen in red caps, dirty flannel shirts, +and trousers rolled up to the knee; also a few ragged beggars.] + +FIRST CARABINIERE [as gate is opened]. Buon giorno! + +[The two carabiniere enter briskly.] + +MARIANO. [springing forward and closing gate, calling to crowd outside]. +No, no! + +FIRST CARABINIERE. Ceerchimo l'assassino Russo. + +MARIANO. Dio mio! Non nell' Albergo Regina Margherita. + +SECOND CARABINIERE [coming to PIKE]. Avete visto un uomo scavalcare il +muro? + +PIKE [genially]. Wishing you many happy returns, Colonel! + +MARIANO [greatly excited]. It is the robber of Russia. They think he +climb the wall, the assassin. The other carabiniere, they surround all +yonder. [Gesturing right and left.] These two they search here. They ask +you, please, have you see him climb the wall. + +PIKE. No. + +FIRST CARABINIERE. Ae quelcuno passato de qui? + +MARIANO. He say has any one go across here? + +PIKE. No. + +FIRST CARABINIERE [pointing under the car]. Chi costui? + +MARIANO. He want to know who that is. + +PIKE. The new chauffeur for the machine, from Naples. + +MARIANO. E lo chauffeur di un illustre personaggio padrone dell' +automobile. + +FIRST CARABINIERE [bowing to PIKE]. Grazia, Signore. [To MARIANO.] +Cerchereremo nel giardino. + +[Exit swiftly FIRST CARABINIERE to the right through pergola; SECOND to +the left.] + +MARIANO. Dio mio! but those are the brave men, Signore. Either one shall +meet in a moment this powerful assassin who may take his lifes. + +[Murmur of voice from back arises, sounds of running feet and shrill +whistles and pounding on gates.] + +[MARIANO runs back, opens the gates, showing excited and clamoring +fishermen and beggars in the lane. They try to come in. He drives them +back with a napkin, which has been hanging over his arm, crying: "Vate, +vate! Devo dire al maresciallo di cacciarvi?"] + +[Meanwhile VASILI has entered from the hotel, a bundle of clean white +rags in his hand.] + +VASILI. Is there a new eruption of Vesuvius? + +PIKE [meeting him and taking the rags]. No; it's an eruption of colonels +trying to arrest a high-school professor. I've got him under your car +there. + +VASILI [astounded]. What! + +PIKE. I told them he's your new chauffeur. + +VASILI. My friend, do you realize the penalty for protecting a criminal +from arrest? + +PIKE. We'll be proud of the risk. + +[Speaks in an undertone to IVANOFF.] + +This man owns the car. You can trust him the same as your own father. + +VASILI [remonstrating]. My friend, my friend! + +[Illustration: "THE NEW CHAUFFEUR FOR THE MACHINE, FROM NAPLES"] + +PIKE [quietly]. Look out, the Governor's staff is coming back. + +MARIANO [closing the gates and wiping his face]. Lazzaroni! + +[At the same time FIRST CARABINIERE enters from right; SECOND +CARABINIERE from left.] + +SECOND CARABINIERE. Niente! + +FIRST CARABINIERE. Niente la! + +[The two CARABINIERE cross briskly to each other as they speak, and +stand conferring.] + +MARIANO. Grazia Dio! He has gone some other place! + +PIKE [very casually to VASILI]. You'll have to get a new off front tire, +Doc. That one is pretty near gone. Better have Jim, here, put on the +spare when he gets through. + +[The CARABINIERE beckon to MARIANO and speak to him.] + +VASILI [seriously, stepping toward PIKE]. Do you know what you are +asking me to do? + +PIKE [watching CARABINIERE]. To put on a new tire. + +[VASILI, with exclamation and gesture of despair grimly tinged with +humor, turns away, greatly disturbed.] + +MARIANO [addressing PIKE with an embarrassed bow]. The carabiniere with +all excuses beg if you will command the chauffeur to step forth from the +automobile. + +PIKE. _No_, sir; I worked on that machine myself for three hours. He's +got his hands full of nuts and screws and bolts half fastened. If he +lays them down now to come out I don't know how long it'll take to get +them back in place. We want to get this job finished. [Continues with a +plaintive uplift of voice.] This is _serious_! Tell them to go on up +Main Street with their Knights of Pythias parade, and come around some +day when we haven't got our hands full. + +MARIANO [meekly]. I tell them--yes, sir. + +[Turns and confers with the CARABINIERE.] + +PIKE. It'll be your turn in a minute, Doc; be mighty careful what you +say. + +MARIANO. Because the chauffeur have been engaged only to-day and have +just arrived, the carabiniere ask ten thousand pardons, but inquire how +long he have been known to his employer. + +[He bows to VASILI with embarrassment.] + +PIKE. How long? Why, he was raised on his father's farm. + +[He faces VASILI, and stretches his arm out toward him as if for +corroboration.] + +MARIANO [to VASILI]. Oh, if that is so! + +PIKE. It _is_ so; ain't it, Doc? + +VASILI [to. MARIANO, with dignity]. You have heard my friend say it. + +MARIANO [to VASILI, in a serious undertone]. Monseigneur graciously +consents that I reveal his incognito to the carabiniere. + +VASILI. Is it necessary? + +MARIANO. Otherwise I fear they will not withdraw; they have suspicion. + +VASILI [with a gesture of resignation]. Very well, tell them. I rely +upon them to preserve my incognito from all others. + +MARIANO [bowing deeply]. Monseigneur, they will be discreet. + +[Goes up to CARABINIERE and speaks to them.] + +PIKE [aside to IVANOFF]. Make a noise--keep busy. [Then with more +emphasis.] But don't you unscrew anything! + +MARIANO [to VASILI, smiling]. Monseigneur, they withdraw. + +[The CARABINIERE, with great deference and gravity, salute VASILI. He +returns the salute curtly.] + +FIRST CARABINIERE. Mille grazias, Signore! + +[MARIANO throws the gates open, the two CARABINIERE go rapidly out, +sweeping the crowd away. MARIANO closes the gates.] + +PIKE [giving MARIANO a coin]. You're pretty good. MARIANO. It required +but the slightest diplomacy, Signore. Thank you, Signore! + +[Exit into the hotel.] + +PIKE [puzzled]. He must have mesmerized the militia. + +VASILI [glancing off]. It is quite safe for the time. + +PIKE [going to the car]. It's all right, old man! + +[Extends his hand to IVANOFF and helps him up from beneath the machine.] + +IVANOFF. I will pray God for you all my life. + +PIKE. Wait till we get you plumb out of the woods. + +IVANOFF [to VASILI]. And you, sir, if I could speak my gratitude-- + +VASILI [crisply]. My American friend yonder has placed himself--and +myself--in danger of the penal code of Italy for protecting you. Perhaps +you will be so good as to let us know for what we have incriminated +ourselves. + +IVANOFF [looking at him keenly]. You are a Russian? + +PIKE. Don't be afraid--he's only a German. + +IVANOFF [bitterly]. The Italian journals call me a brigand, inspired by +the Russian legation in Rome. My name is Ivanoff Ivanovitch. + +PIKE [reassuringly]. All right, old man! + +IVANOFF. I was condemned in Petersburg ten years ago. I was a professor +of the languages, a translator in the bureau of the Minister of Finance. +I was a member of the Society of the Blue Fifty, a constitutionalist. + +PIKE. Good for you. + +IVANOFF. I was able to do little for the cause, though I tried. + +VASILI. How did you try? + +IVANOFF. I transferred funds of the government to the Society of the +Blue Fifty. Never one ruble for myself. [Strikes himself on the breast.] +It was for Russia's sake--not mine! + +VASILI [sharply]. But you committed the great Russian crime of getting +yourself caught? + +IVANOFF. Through treachery. There was an Englishman who lived in +Petersburg. He had contracts with the government--I thought he was my +best friend. I had married in my student days in Paris--ah, it is the +old story [bitterly]! I knew that this Englishman admired my wife; but I +trusted him--as I trusted her--and he made my house his home. I had +fifty thousand rubles in my desk to be delivered to my society. The +police came to search; they found only me--but not my wife nor my +English friend--nor the fifty thousand rubles! I went to Siberia. Now I +search for those two. + +VASILI [gravely]. Was it they who sent the police? + +IVANOFF. After they had taken the money and were beyond the frontier +themselves. That is all I have against them. + +PIKE [gently]. Looks to me like it would be enough. + +VASILI. Then, by your own confession, you are an embezzler and a +revolutionist. + +PIKE [going to VASILI quickly]. Why, the man's down; you wouldn't go +back on him now. + +[With a half chuckle.] + +Besides, you've made yourself one of his confederates. + +VASILI. Upon my soul, so I have. + +[Bursts into laughter and lays his hands on PIKE'S shoulders.] + +My friend, from my first sight of you in the hotel at Napoli I saw that +you were a great man. + +PIKE [grinning]. What are you doing, running for Congress? + +VASILI [after a grave look at IVANOFF, turns to PIKE again]. I do not +think that the carabiniere went away without suspicion. + +IVANOFF. Suspicion! They will watch every exit from the hotel and its +grounds. What can I do, until darkness-- + +PIKE [motioning toward the hotel]. Why, Doc's got the whole lower floor +of this wing--you're his chauffeur-- + +VASILI [quickly, grimly]. I was about to suggest it. I have a room that +can easily be spared to Professor Ivanoff. + +IVANOFF [going to them, greatly touched]. My friends, God bless both of +you! + +[As he speaks he shakes hands with PIKE and turns to offer his hand to +VASILI, who, apparently without noticing it, goes up toward the hotel.] + +PIKE. Don't waste time talkin' about that. I shouldn't be surprised if +you were hungry. + +[Takes him by elbow and walks him to door of hotel.] + +IVANOFF. I have had no food for a day. + +VASILI [grimly]. My valet de chambre will attend to Professor Ivanoff's +needs. No one shall be allowed to enter his room. + +PIKE. And don't you go out of it, either. + +VASILI. He shall not. This way. + +[The three go into the hotel. Immediately on their disappearance LADY +CREECH'S curtains are whisked aside; she pops out of the window with the +suddenness of Punch, leans far out with her head upside down, at the +risk of her neck, trying to watch them even after they have entered the +hotel. Laughter of MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY heard at left. LADY CREECH waves +her hand as if signalling in that direction and withdraws from window.] + +[Enter HORACE and MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY from the garden, he carrying her +parasol and looking into her eyes. She is laughing.] + +[Enter LADY CREECH from the hotel, wildly excited.] + +LADY CREECH. Have you seen my brother--where is Lord Hawcastle? + +HORACE. On the other side of the hotel, Lady Creech; down there on the +last terrace just as far as you can go. + +[Exit LADY CREECH down left.] + +HORACE. Ah, but you laugh at me, chere Comtesse! + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [gently]. It is because I cannot believe you are +always serious. + +HORACE. Serious? Like a lady to her knight of old, set me some task to +prove how serious I am. [Deliriously.] Anything! + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY. Ah, gladly! Complete those odious settlement! +Overcome the resistance of this bad man who so trouble your sweet +sister! + +HORACE. You promise me when it is settled that I may speak to you +[becomes suddenly nervous and embarrassed]--that I may speak to you-- + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [sweetly]. Yes--speak to me-- + +HORACE. Speak as--as you must know I want to speak--as I hardly dare-- + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [softly, her eyes upon the ground]. Ah, that shall +be when you please, dear friend. + +HORACE [almost choked with gratitude]. Oh! + +[He kisses her hand.] + +[HAWCASTLE and LADY CREECH enter from the garden, LADY CREECH talking +excitedly.] + +[ALMERIC enters through the gates.] + +LADY CREECH. I tell you I couldn't hear a word they said, they mumbled +their words so. But upon my soul, Hawcastle, if I couldn't hear, didn't +I _see_ enough? + +HAWCASTLE. Upon my soul, I believe you did. + +ALMERIC. Quite a family pow-wow you're havin'. + +HAWCASTLE. Is there anything unusual in the village? + +ALMERIC. Ra-ther! Carabiniere all over the shop--still huntin' that +bandit feller. + +LADY CREECH. Don't mumble your words! + +ALMERIC [shouting]. Lookin' for a bally bandit. + +[She screams faintly.] + +HAWCASTLE. Be quiet! + +ALMERIC. He's still in this neighborhood, they think. + +LADY CREECH [to HAWCASTLE]. What did I tell you? Now, how long-- + +HAWCASTLE. You shall not repeat one word of what you saw. Almeric, find +your betrothed and ask her to come here. + +ALMERIC. Rumbo! I don't mind, pater! + +[Exit into the hotel.] + +HORACE. What's the row? + +HAWCASTLE. My dear young man, I congratulate you that you and your +sister need no longer submit to an odious dictation. + +[Enter PIKE briskly from the hotel.] + +PIKE [as he enters, genially]. Looks to me like it was going to clear up +cold. + +[LADY CREECH haughtily stalks off into the garden.] + +HAWCASTLE [pleasantly]. Good-afternoon, Mr. Pike. + +PIKE [going to the motor]. Howdy! + +[Begins touching different parts of the engine.] + +[MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY and HORACE haughtily follow LADY CREECH.] + +HAWCASTLE [suavely, to PIKE]. Mr. Pike, it is an immense pity that there +should have been any misunderstanding in the matter of your ward's +betrothal. + +PIKE [looking up for a moment, mildly]. Oh, I wouldn't call it a +misunderstanding. + +HAWCASTLE. It would ill become a father to press upon the subject of his +son's merits-- + +PIKE [plaintively]. I don't want to talk about _him_ with you--I don't +want to hurt your feelings. + +HAWCASTLE. Perhaps I might better put it on the ground of your ward's +wishes--of certain advantages of position which it is her ambition to +attain. + +PIKE [troubled]. I can't talk about it with anybody but her. + +[Enter MARIANO from the hotel with a letter on a tray. Goes to PIKE.] + +HAWCASTLE. There is another matter-- + +[PIKE stands examining envelope of the letter in profound thought.] + +I fear I do not have your attention. + +[MARIANO goes into the hotel.] + +PIKE [looking up]. Go ahead! + +HAWCASTLE. There is _another_ matter to which I may wish to call your +attention. + +PIKE [genially]. Oh, I'll talk about anything _else_ with you. + +HAWCASTLE [suavely]. This is a question distinctly different +[with a glance at the hotel, his voice growing somewhat +threatening]--distinctly! + +[ETHEL enters from the hotel.] + +ETHEL [to HAWCASTLE, in a troubled voice]. You wished me to come here. + +HAWCASTLE [going to her and taking her hand]. My child, I wish you to +have another chat with our strangely prejudiced friend on the subject so +near to all our hearts. And I wish to tell you that I see light +breaking through our clouds. Even if he prove obdurate, do not be +downcast--all will be well. + +[Turns and goes out into the garden, his voice coming back in benign, +fatherly tones.] + +All will be well! + +[PIKE stands regarding ETHEL, who does not look up at him.] + +PIKE [gently]. I'm glad you've come, Miss Ethel. I've got something here +I want to read to you. + +ETHEL [coldly]. I did not come to hear you read. + +PIKE. When I got your letter at home I wrote to Jim Cooley, our +vice-consul at London, to look up the records of these Hawcastle folks +and write to me here about how they stand in their own community. + +ETHEL [astounded]. What! + +PIKE. What's thought of them by the best citizens, and so on. + +ETHEL [enraged]. You had the audacity--_you_--to pry into the affairs of +the Earl of Hawcastle! + +PIKE. Why, I'd 'a' done that--I wouldn't 'a' stopped at anything--I'd' +'a' done that if it had been the Governor of Indiana himself! + +ETHEL. You didn't consider it indelicate to write to strangers about my +intimate affairs? + +PIKE [placatingly]. Why, Jim Cooley's home-folks! His office used to be +right next to mine in Kokomo. + +ETHEL. It's monstrous--and when _they_ find what you've done--Oh, hadn't +you shamed me enough without this? + +PIKE. I expect this letter'll show who ought to be ashamed. Now just +let's sit down here and try to work things out together. + +ETHEL [with a slight, bitter laugh]. "Work things out together!" + +PIKE. I'm sorry--for _you_, I mean. But I don't see any other way to do +it, except--together. Won't you? + +[She moves slowly forward and sits at extreme left of the bench. He +watches her, noticing how far she withdraws from him, bows his head +humbly, with a sad smile, then sits, not quite at the extreme right of +the bench, but near it.] + +PIKE. I haven't opened the letter yet. I want you to read it first, but +I ought to tell you there's probably things in it'll hurt your feelings, +sort of, mebbe. + +ETHEL [icily]. How? + +PIKE. Well, I haven't much of a doubt but Jim'll have some statements +in it that'll show you I'm right about these people. If he's got the +facts, I _know_ he will. + +ETHEL. _How_ do you know it? + +PIKE. Because I've had experience enough of life-- + +ETHEL. In Kokomo? + +PIKE. Yes, ma'am! there's just as many kinds of people in Kokomo as +there is in Pekin, and I didn't serve a term in the legislature without +learning to pick underhand men at sight. Now that Earl, let alone his +havin' a bad eye--his ways are altogether too much on the stripe of T. +Cuthbert Bentley's to suit me. + +[He opens the envelope slowly, continuing.] + +T. Cuthbert was a Chicago gentleman with a fur-lined overcoat. He opened +up a bank in our town, and when he caught the Canadian express, three +months later, all he left in Kokomo was the sign on the front door. That +was _painted_ on. And as for the son. But there--I don't know as I have +a call to say more. + +[Takes the letter from the envelope.] + +Here's the letter; read it for yourself. + +[Gives it to her, watching her as she reads.] + +ETHEL [reading]. "Dear Dan: The Earldom of Hawcastle is one of the +oldest in the Kingdom, and the St. Aubyns have distinguished themselves +in the forefront of English battles from Agincourt and Crecy to +Sebastopol. + +[She reads this in a ringing voice and glances at him.] + +[PIKE looks puzzled and depressed.] + +"The present holder of the title came into it unexpectedly through a +series of accidental deaths. He was a younger son's younger son, and had +spent some years in Russia in business--what, I do not know--under +another name. I suppose he assumed it that the historic name of St. +Aubyn might not be tarnished by association with trade. He has spent so +much of his life out of England that it is difficult to find out a great +deal about him. Nothing here in his English record is seriously against +him; though everything he has is mortgaged over its value, the entail +having been broken. + +[ETHEL pauses and looks at PIKE, who, much disturbed, rises, and crosses +the stage.] + +"As to his son, the Honorable Almeric, there's no objection alleged +against his character. That's all I've been able to learn." + +[She finishes with an air of triumphant finality, and rises with a +laugh.] + +A terrible indictment! So that was what you counted on to convince me of +my mistake? + +PIKE [distressed]. Yes--it _was_! + +ETHEL. Do you assert there is _one_ word in this seriously discreditable +to the reputation of Lord Hawcastle or Mr. St. Aubyn? + +PIKE [humbly]. No. + +ETHEL. And you remember, it is the testimony offered by your own friend +[scornfully]--by your own detective! + +PIKE [ruefully]. Oh, if I wanted a detective I wouldn't get Jim +Cooley--at least, not any _more_! + +[His attitude is thoroughly crestfallen.] + +ETHEL [triumphantly, almost graciously]. I shall tell Lord Hawcastle +that you will be ready to take up the matter of the settlement the +moment his solicitor arrives. + +PIKE. No, I wouldn't do that. + +ETHEL [in a challenging voice]. Why not? + +PIKE [doggedly]. Because I won't take up the matter of settlements with +him or any one else. + +ETHEL [angrily]. Do you mean you cannot see what a humiliation your +interference has brought upon you in this? + +PIKE. No; I see that plain enough. + +ETHEL. Have you, after this, any further objections to my alliance with +Mr. St. Aubyn? + +PIKE. It ain't an alliance with Mr. St. Aubyn that you're after. + +ETHEL. Then what am I [pauses and lays scornful emphasis on the next +word] _after_? + +[Illustration: "YOU'RE AFTER SOMETHING THERE ISN'T ANYTHING TO"] + +PIKE [slowly]. You're after something there isn't anything to. If I'd +let you buy what you want to with your money and your whole life, you'd +find it as empty as the morning after Judgment Day. + +[She turns from him, smiling and superior.] + +You think because I'm a jay country lawyer I don't understand it and +couldn't understand _you_! Why, we've got just the same thing at home. +There was little Annie Hoffmeyer. Her pa was a carpenter and doing well. +But Annie couldn't get into the Kokomo Ladies' Literary Club, and her +name didn't show up in the society column four or five times every +Saturday morning, so she got her pa to give her the money to marry Artie +Seymour, the minister's son--and a _regular_ minister's son he was! +Almost broke Hoffmeyer's heart, but he let her have her way and went in +debt and bought them a little house on North Main Street. That was two +years ago. Annie's workin' at the depoe candy-stand now and Artie's +workin' at the hotel bar--in front--drinking up what's left of old +Hoffmeyer's--settlement! + +ETHEL [outraged]. And you say you understand--you who couple the name of +a tippling yokel with that of a St. Aubyn--a gentleman of distinction. + +PIKE. Distinction? I didn't know he was distinguished. + +ETHEL [in a ringing voice]. His ancestors have fought with glory on +every field of battle from Crecy and Agincourt to the Crimea. + +PIKE. But you won't _see_ much of his _ancestors_. + +ETHEL. He bears their name. + +PIKE [with authority and dignity]. Yes--and it's the _name_ you want. +Nobody could look at you and not know it wasn't _him_. It's the _name_! +And I'd let you buy it if it would make you happy--if you didn't have to +take the people with it. + +[A deepening of color in the light shows that it has grown to be late +afternoon, near sunset.] + +ETHEL [angrily]. The "people"? + +PIKE. Yes; the whole gang. Can't you see how they're counting on it? +It's in their faces, in their ways! This Earl--don't you see he's +counting on living on you? Do you think the son would get that +settlement? Why, a Terre Hut pickpocket could get it away from +_him_--let alone his old man! What do _you_ think would become of the +"settlement"? + +ETHEL. Part of it would go to the restoration of Hawcastle Hall and part +to Glenwood Priory. + +PIKE. Glenwood Priory? + +ETHEL. That is part of the estate where Almeric and I will live until +Lord Hawcastle's death. + +PIKE. Then mighty little settlement would come around "Glenwood Priory"! + +[Speaks the name as though grimly amused, and continues.] + +And this old lady--this Mrs. Creech you been travelling with-- + +ETHEL [sharply]. Lady Creech! + +PIKE. All right! Don't you think _she's_ counting on it? And this French +lady that's with them; isn't she trying to land your brother? The whole +crowd is on the track of John Simpson's money. + +ETHEL. Silence! You have no right to traduce them. Do you place no value +upon heredity, upon high birth? + +PIKE. Why, I think so much of it that I know John Simpson's daughter +doesn't need anybody else's to help her out. + +[He comes toward her, looking at her with honest admiration.] + +She's fine enough and I think she's sweet enough--and I know from the +way she goes for me that she's _brave_ enough--to stand on her own feet! + +ETHEL. This is beside the point; I know exactly what I want in +life--[she has been somewhat moved by his last speech, is agitated, and +a little breathless]--and I could not change now if it were otherwise. I +gave Almeric my promise, it was forever, and I shall keep it. + +PIKE. But you can't; I'm not going to let you. + +ETHEL. I throw your interference to the winds. I shall absolutely +disregard it. I shall marry without your consent. + +PIKE [looking at her steadily]. Do you think _they'd_ let you? + +ETHEL [in same tone]. I think _you'll_ let me [laughing], especially +after this terrible letter. + +PIKE. By-the-way, did you finish it? + +[ETHEL looks at the letter, which she has continued to hold in her +hand.] + +ETHEL. I think so. [Turns the page.] No--it says "over." + +[She turns the sheet--looks at it attentively for a moment--looks up, +casts a quick glance of astonishment at PIKE.] + +PIKE. Well, read it, please! + +ETHEL. It appears to concern a matter quite personal to yourself. + +[Embarrassed, assuming carelessness. Turns toward left as if to leave, +replacing the letter in the envelope.] + +PIKE [advancing to her, smiling]. I don't think I've got any secrets. + +ETHEL [coldly]. Please remember, I have not read anything on the last +page. + +PIKE. Well, neither have I. + +[Reaching his hand for the letter.] + +ETHEL [more embarrassed]. Oh! + +[She drops the letter on the bench.] + +[PIKE picks it up and walks slowly toward right, taking it from +envelope. She stands looking after him with breathless amazement, far +from hostile, yet half turned as if to go at once. PIKE, taking the +letter out of the envelope, suddenly looks back at her. At this she is +flustered and starts, but halts at sound of the "Fishermen's Song" in +the distance. The sunset is deepening to golden red; the "Fishermen's +Song" begins with mandolins and guitars, and then a number of voices are +heard together.] + +ETHEL. Listen: those are the fishermen coming home. + +[PIKE stands in arrested attitude, not having looked at the letter. The +song, beginning faintly, grows louder, then slowly dies away in the +distance. The two stand listening in deepening twilight.] + +PIKE [as the voices cease to be heard]. It's mighty pretty, but it's +kind of foreign and lonesome, too. [With a sad half-chuckle.] I'd rather +hear something that sounded more like home. [A growing tremulousness in +his voice.] I expect you've about forgot everything like that, haven't +you? + +ETHEL [gently]. Yes. + +PIKE. Seems funny, now; but out on the ocean, coming here, I kept kind +of looking forward to hearing you sing. I knew how high your pa had you +educated in music, and, like the old fool I was, I kept thinking you'd +sing for me some evening--"Sweet Genevieve" mebbe. You know it--don't +you? + +ETHEL [slowly]. "Sweet Genevieve?" I used to--but it's rather +old-fashioned and common, isn't it? + +PIKE. I expect so; I reckon mebbe that's the reason I like it so much. + +[With an apologetic and pathetic laugh.] + +Yes'm, it's my favorite. I couldn't--I couldn't get you to sing it for +me before I go back home--could I? + +ETHEL. I--I think not. + +[She looks at him thoughtfully, then goes slowly into the hotel.] + +[PIKE sighs, and begins to read the last page of the letter.] + +PIKE [reading]. "I am sorry old man Simpson's daughter thinks of buying +a title. Somehow I have a notion that that may hit you, Dan. + +[Poignant dismay and awe are expressed in his voice as he continues.] + +"I haven't forgotten how you always kept that picture of her on your +desk. The old man thought so much of you I had an idea he hoped she'd +come back some day and marry a man from home." + +I don't wonder she said she hadn't read it! + +[His face begins to light with radiant amazement.] + +But she _had_--and she didn't go away--that is, not _right_ away! + +[LORD HAWCASTLE and HORACE enter from the hotel.] + +HORACE [speaking as they enter]. But, Lord Hawcastle, Ethel says Mr. +Pike positively refuses. + +HAWCASTLE. Leave him to me. Within ten minutes he will be as meek as a +nun. + +[HORACE goes into the hotel.] + +My dear Pike, there is a certain question-- + +PIKE [in his mildest tone]. I don't want to seem rough with you, but I +meant what I said. + +HAWCASTLE. Imagining I did not mean _that_ question-- + +PIKE. Then it's all right. + +HAWCASTLE. Late this afternoon I developed a great anxiety concerning +the penalty prescribed by Italian law for those unfortunate and +impulsive individuals who connive at the escape or concealment--[he +speaks with significant emphasis and a glance at the hotel, where lights +begin to appear in the windows]--of certain other unfortunates who may +be, to speak vulgarly, wanted--by the police. + +PIKE [coolly]. You're anxious about that, are you? + +HAWCASTLE. So deeply that I ascertained the penalty for it. You may +confirm my information by appealing to the nearest carabiniere--strange +to say, many of them are very near. The minimum penalty for one whose +kind heart has thus betrayed him--[he turns up sharply toward the +lighted windows of hotel, then sharply again to PIKE, his voice +lifting]--is two years' imprisonment, and Italian prisons, I am credibly +informed, are quite ferociously unpleasant. + +PIKE [gently]. Well, being in jail _any_ place ain't much like an Elks' +carnival. + +HAWCASTLE. There would be no escape, even for a citizen of your +admirable country, if his complicity were established, especially if he +happened to be--as it were--caught in the act! + +PIKE [grimly]. Talk plain; talk plain. + +HAWCASTLE. My dear young friend, imagine that a badly wanted man appears +upon the pergola here and makes an appeal of I know not what nature to +one of your fellow-countrymen, who--for the purposes of argument--is at +work upon this car. Say that the too-amiable American conceals the +fugitive under the automobile, and afterward, with the connivance of a +friend, deceives the officers of the law and shelters the criminal, say +in a room of that lower suite yonder. + +[His voice shows growing excitement as a man's shadow appears on the +shade of the window nearest the door.] + +Imagine, for instance, that the shadow which at this moment appears on +the curtain were that of the wanted man--_then_, would you not agree +that a moderate and reasonable request of your fellow-countryman might +be acceded to? + +PIKE [swallowing painfully]. What would be the nature of that request? + +HAWCASTLE. It would concern a certain alliance; _might_ concern a +certain settlement. + +PIKE. If the request were refused, what would the consequences be? + +HAWCASTLE. Two years, at least, for the American, and the friend who had +been his accessory. Altogether I should consider it a disastrous +situation. + +PIKE [thoughtfully]. Yes; looks like it. + +HAWCASTLE [with sharp significance]. If this fellow-countryman of yours +were assured that the law would be made to take its course if a +favorable answer were not received--say, by ten o'clock to-night--what, +in your opinion, would his answer be? + +PIKE [plaintively]. Well, it would all depend upon which of my +countrymen you caught. If it depended on the one I know best, he'd tell +you he'd see you in _hell_ first! + +[The two remain staring fixedly at each other as the curtain slowly +descends.] + + +END OF THE SECOND ACT + + + + +THE THIRD ACT + + +SCENE: A handsome private salon in the hotel the same evening. There are +cabinets against the walls, buhl tables, luxurious tapestried chairs, +etc. At back, double doors, wide open, disclose a brilliantly lit +conservatory and hall with palms and oleanders in bloom. On the left a +heavily curtained window looks out upon the garden; on the right is a +closed door. Unseen, an orchestra is playing an aria from "Pagliacci." + +The rise of the curtain discloses PIKE sitting in a dejected attitude in +an arm-chair. He wears a black tie, collar and linen as before, black +trousers, a white waistcoat, cut rather low, and a black +frock-coat--"Western statesman" style--not fashionably cut, but +well-fitting and graceful. + +MARIANO passes through the conservatory at back bearing a coffee-tray. +LADY CREECH, in an evening gown of black velvet and lace, follows with +stately tread. HORACE, in evening clothes, follows, with MADAME DE +CHAMPIGNY on his arm; she is in a handsome, very Parisian, decollete +dress. They are deep in tender conversation. + +ETHEL follows, on the arm of ALMERIC. She wears a pretty evening gown, +ALMERIC in evening clothes; her head is bent, her eyes cast down. + +A valet de chambre enters the salon from the hall. He touches an +electric button on wall near door. RIBIERE comes quickly and noiselessly +from the room to the right. They stand bowing as VASILI enters through +the conservatory. Valet immediately closes the doors. VASILI wears an +overcoat trimmed with sables, a silk hat, evening clothes, and white +gloves; order ribbon in his button-hole. + +PIKE [as VASILI enters]. I'm mighty glad you've come--I've been waiting. + +VASILI [to RIBIERE, and speaking in undertone]. You have telegraphed for +the information? + +RIBIERE. Yes, sir. + +[Valet, with coat, hat, etc., goes out, followed by RIBIERE.] + +VASILI. I have dined with an old tutor of mine. Once every year I come +here to do that. + +[Valet returns with vodka and cigarettes, which he places on a table, +immediately withdrawing.] + +VASILI [with a keen glance at PIKE]. And you; I suppose you dined with +the charming young lady, your ward, and her brother, as you expected? + +PIKE [turning away sadly]. Oh no, they've got friends of their own +here. + +VASILI. So I have observed. + +[Sips vodka.] + +PIKE. Oh, I don't mind their not asking me. + +[With an assumption of cheerfulness.] + +Fact is, these friends of hers are trying to get me to do something I +can't do-- + +VASILI. You need not tell me that, my friend. I have both eyes and ears; +I understand. + +PIKE [troubled, coming near him]. I wish you understood the rest, +because it ain't easy for me to tell you. Doc, I'm afraid I've got you +into a pretty bad hole. + +VASILI [smiling]. Ah, that I fear I do not understand. + +PIKE [remorsefully]. I'm afraid I have. You and Ivanoff and me--all +three of us. This Hawcastle knows, and he knows it as well as I know +you're sittin' in that chair, that we've got that poor fellow in yonder. + +[Pointing to the door on the right.] + +VASILI. Surely you can trust Lord Hawcastle not to mention it. He must +know that the consequences for you, as well as for me, would be, to say +the least, disastrous. Surely you made that clear to him. + +PIKE [grimly]. No; he made it clear to me. Two years in jail is the +minimum, and if I don't make up my mind by ten o'clock [VASILI looks at +his watch] to do what he wants me to do-- + +VASILI. What does he want you to do? + +PIKE. The young lady's father trusted me to look after her, and if I +won't promise to let her pay seven hundred and fifty thousand dollars +for that--well, you've seen it around here, haven't you-- + +VASILI. I have observed it--that is, if you refer to the son of Lord +Hawcastle. + +PIKE. Well, if I don't consent to do that, I reckon Ivanoff has to go +back to Siberia and you and I to jail. + +VASILI. He threatens that? + +PIKE. He'll _do_ that! + +VASILI [looking at him sharply]. What do _you_ mean to do? + +PIKE. There wouldn't be any trouble about it if it was only me. That +would make it easy. They could land me for two years [swallowing +painfully] or twenty. What makes it so hard is that I can't do what they +want, even to let you and Ivanoff out. It ain't my money. All I can do +is to ask you to forgive me, and warn you to get away before they come +down on me. This feller's _got_ me, Doc. Don't you see how it stands? +Ivanoff can't get away-- + +VASILI. No; I think he can't. + +PIKE. They've got this militia all around the place. + +VASILI. I passed through the cordon of carabiniere as I came in. + +PIKE. [urgently]. But you could get away, Doc. Up to ten o'clock you can +come and go as you choose. + +VASILI [rising]. So can you. You have not thought of that? + +PIKE. No; and I won't think of it. But as for you-- + +VASILI. As for me [rings bell near door]--I shall go! + +PIKE. That's part of the load off my mind. I can't bear to think of the +rest of it. I haven't known how to tell that poor fellow in there. + +[Valet enters.] + +VASILI [to valet, indicating the door on the right]. Appellez le +Monsieur la. + +[Valet goes to the door, opens it, bowing slightly to IVANOFF, who +appears. Valet withdraws.] + +[IVANOFF is very pale and haggard looking, but his clothes have been +mended and neatly brushed. He comes in slowly and quietly.] + +VASILI [in the tone of a superior]. You may come in, Ivanoff. Some +unexpected difficulties have arisen. Your presence here has been +discovered by persons who wish evil to this gentleman who has protected +you. He can do nothing further to save you unless he betrays a trust +which has been left to him. + +[IVANOFF swallows painfully, and looks pitifully from VASILI to PIKE.] + +PIKE [coming down to IVANOFF, standing before him humbly]. It's the +truth, old man. I can't do it. + +[IVANOFF'S head falls forward on his chest.] + +IVANOFF [in a low voice]. I thank you for what you have tried to do for +me. + +[Gives PIKE his hand. PIKE turns away.] + +VASILI. You have until ten o'clock. [Valet appears in the doorway.] + +Mon chapeau et pardessus. + +[Exit valet.] + +In the meantime my friend believes Naples a safe place for me. + +[Valet returns with his coat, hat, and gloves.] + +And so, auf weidersehn. + +[Dismisses the valet with a gesture.] + +PIKE [going to him and shaking hands heartily]. Good-bye, Doc, and God +bless you! + +VASILI. To our next meeting. + +[Exit briskly through the upper doors. As they close behind him, +IVANOFF'S manner changes. He goes rapidly to a table, picks up the +cigarettes, which are in a large silver open box, and touches the bottle +of vodka significantly.] + +IVANOFF. I thought so--Russian! + +PIKE. What! + +IVANOFF. That man, your friend, who calls himself Groellerhagen, is not a +German--he is a Russian--not only that, he is a Russian noble. I see it +in a hundred ways that you cannot. + +PIKE. Whatever he is, he helped us this afternoon. I'd trust him to the +bone. + +IVANOFF. I have felt it inevitable that I should go back to Siberia. A +thousand times have I felt it since I entered these rooms. + +[He goes down toward the window.] + +PIKE. I know you feel mighty bad, but perhaps--perhaps-- + +IVANOFF. There is no perhaps for me. There was never any perhaps after I +met Helene. + +PIKE [scratching his head]. Helene! + +IVANOFF. Helene was my wife, she who sent me to Siberia, she and my +dear, accursed English friend. + +PIKE [thoughtfully]. What was his name? + +IVANOFF. His name--it was Glenwood. I shall not forget that name soon. + +PIKE. What was he doing in Russia? + +IVANOFF. I have told you he had contracts with the Ministry of +Finance--he supplied hydraulic machinery to the government. Does the +name Glenwood mean anything to you? Have you heard it? + +PIKE [profoundly thoughtful, pauses, looking at IVANOFF sharply]. No. +[Then to himself.] And there must be a million Helenes in France. + +IVANOFF. I prayed God to let me meet them before I was taken. But I talk +too much of myself. I wish to know--you--you will be safe. They can do +nothing to you, can they? + +PIKE [with assumed cheerfulness]. Oh, I'm all right--don't worry about +me. + +[Loud knock at the upper doors.] + +IVANOFF [despairingly]. It is the carabiniere. + +PIKE. Steady. [Looks at watch.] Not yet. Go back. We won't throw our +hands into the discard until we're called. We'll keep on raising. + +[Exit IVANOFF through door on the right, closing it after him.] + +[PIKE scratches his head and slowly says: "Helene." Then calls: "Come +in!"] + +[MARIANO opens the upper doors from without and bows.] + +MARIANO. Miladi Creesh--she ask you would speak with her a few minutes? + +PIKE. All right! Where is she? + +MARIANO. Here, sir. + +PIKE. Come right in, ma'am! + +[LADY CREECH enters.] + +LADY CREECH [frigidly]. I need scarcely inform you that this interview +is not of my seeking. [She sits stiffly.] On the contrary, it is +intensely disagreeable to me. My brother-in-law feels that some one well +acquainted with Miss Granger-Simpson's ambitions and her inner nature +should put the case finally to you before we proceed to extremities. + +PIKE. Yes, ma'am! + +LADY CREECH [crossly]. Don't mumble your words if you expect me to +listen to you. + +PIKE [cordially]. Go on, ma'am! + +LADY CREECH. My brother-in-law has made us aware of the state of +affairs, and we are quite in sympathy with my brother-in-law's attitude +as to what should be done to you. + +PIKE [in a tone of genial inquiry]. Yes, ma'am; and what do you think +ought to be done to me? + +LADY CREECH. If, in the kindness of our hearts, we condone your offence, +we insist upon your accession to our reasonable demands. + +PIKE [sardonically]. By ten o'clock! + +LADY CREECH. Quite so. + +PIKE. You say he told all of you? Has he told Miss Ethel? + +LADY CREECH. It hasn't been thought proper. Young girls should be +shielded from everything disagreeable. + +PIKE. Yes, ma'am; that's the idea that got me into this trouble. + +LADY CREECH. I say, this young lady, who seems to be technically your +ward, is considered, by all of us who understand her, infinitely more +_my_ ward. + +PIKE. Yes, ma'am! Go on. + +LADY CREECH [loftily]. She came to me something more than a year ago-- + +PIKE [simply]. Did you advertise? + +LADY CREECH [stung]. I suppose it is your intention to be offensive. + +PIKE [protesting]. No, ma'am; I didn't mean anything. But, you see, +I've handled all her accounts, and her payments to you-- + +LADY CREECH [crushingly]. We will omit tradesman-like references! What +Lord Hawcastle wished me to impress on you is not only that you will +ruin yourself, but put a blight upon the life of the young lady whom you +are pleased to consider your ward. We make this suggestion because we +conceive that you have a preposterous sentimental interest yourself in +Miss Granger-Simpson. + +PIKE [taken aback]. Me? + +LADY CREECH. Upon what other ground are we to explain your conduct? + +PIKE. You mean that I'd only stand between her and you for my own sake? + +LADY CREECH. We can comprehend no other grounds. + +PIKE [solemnly]. I don't believe you can! But you _can_ comprehend that +I wouldn't have any hope, can't you? + +LADY CREECH. One never knows what these weird Americans hope. Hawcastle +assures me you have some such idea, but my charge has studied under my +instruction--deportment, manners, and ideals--which has lifted her above +the mere American circumstance of her birth. She has ambitions. If you +stand in the way of them she will wither, she will die like a caged +bird. All that was sordid about her parentage she has cast off. We have +thought that we might make something out of her. + +PIKE [in a clear voice, looking at her mildly]. Make _something_ out of +her--yes, _ma'am!_ + +LADY CREECH [quickly]. Make something _better_ of her. We offer her this +alliance with a family which for seven hundred years-- + +PIKE. Yes, ma'am--Crecy and Agincourt--I know. + +LADY CREECH. With a family never sullied by those low ideals of barter +and exchange which are the governing impulses of your countrymen. + +PIKE. Seven hundred years--[fumbling in coat-pocket]--why, look here, +Mrs. Creech! + +[At this LADY CREECH half rises from her chair with a profound shudder, +sinks back again; PIKE continues.] + +I've got a letter right here [takes letter from pocket] that tells me +your brother-in-law was in business--and I respect him for it--only a +few years ago. + +LADY CREECH [angrily]. A letter from whom? + +PIKE. Jim Cooley, our vice-consul in London. Jim ain't the wisest man in +the world, but he seems to have this all right, and _he_ says Mr. +Hawcastle-- + +LADY CREECH [exploding]. _Mr._ Hawcastle! + +PIKE [placatingly]. Well, I can call a person Colonel or Cap or Doc or +anything of that kind, but I just plain don't know how to use the kind +of words you have over here for those things. They don't seem to fit my +mouth, somehow. Just let me run on my own way. I don't mean to hurt your +feelings. Anyway, Jim says your brother-in-law was in business in +Russia. + +[Up to this point he has gone on rapidly, but after the word "Russia" he +pauses abruptly as if startled by a sudden thought and slowly repeats.] + +"In business in Russia!" + +[He rises.] + +LADY CREECH. This is beside the point entirely! + +PIKE. It _is_ the point! Now, between us, ain't Jim right? Ain't it the +truth? + +LADY CREECH [angry and agitated]. Since some of your vulgar American +officials have been spying about-- + +PIKE [with controlled excitement]. Your brother-in-law was in business +in Russia; so far, so good. + +[Leans upon back of chair watching her, eager, but smiling cordially.] + +I don't say he was peddling shoe-strings on the corner or selling +weinerwursts-- + +[LADY CREECH gives a slight scream of indignation.] + +PIKE [continuing]. Probably something more hifalutin' and dignified than +that. He was probably agent for a wooden butter-dish factory. + +LADY CREECH [enraged]. He had contracts with the Russian government +itself! + +PIKE (staggering back, recovers himself immediately, and, speaking +sharply, but in a voice of great agitation). _Not_ for mining--_not_ for +hydraulic machines! + +LADY CREECH. And even so he protected the historic name of St. Aubyn. + +PIKE. By God, I believe you! + +LADY CREECH. Don't mumble your words! + +PIKE. Had he ever lived at Glenwood Priory? + +LADY CREECH [indignantly]. Is your mind wandering? The priory belonged +to Hawcastle's mother. Can you state its connection with the subject? + +PIKE. That's how he protected the historic name of St. Aubyn! That's the +name he took--Glenwood! + +LADY CREECH. What of that? + +PIKE [awe-struck]. God moves in a mysterious way his wonders to perform! + +LADY CREECH. Oblige me by omitting blasphemous allusions in my +presence. What answer are you prepared to make to Lord Hawcastle? + +PIKE [in a ringing voice]. Tell your brother-in-law that he can have my +answer in ten minutes--and he can come to me _here_ for it! I'll give it +in the presence of the young lady and her brother. + +LADY CREECH [turning to go]. Her brother--certainly! He is in perfect +sympathy with our attitude. As for Miss Granger-Simpson's knowing +anything of this most disagreeable affair--no! + +PIKE. I beg your pardon. + +LADY CREECH. I shall not permit her to come near here. As her chaperone +I refuse. We all refuse! + +PIKE. All right; refuse away. + +LADY CREECH. I shall tell Lord Hawcastle-- + +PIKE. Ten minutes from now and in this room. + +LADY CREECH. But Miss Granger-Simpson under no condition whatever. + +[Sweeps out haughtily.] + +[PIKE closes the doors behind her, touches an electric button over the +mantel, then sits at desk and writes hurriedly. Knock at upper doors.] + +PIKE. Come in! + +[Enter MARIANO.] + +PIKE. Mariano, I want you to take this note to Miss Simpson. + +[Quickly enclosing note in envelope and addressing it.] + +MARIANO. To Mees Granger-Seempson? + +PIKE. Do you know where she is? + +MARIANO. She walks on the terrace alone. + +PIKE. Give it to her yourself--to no one else--[emphatically]--and do it +now. + +[Gives him the note.] + +MARIANO. At once, sir! + +[Going.] + +PIKE. Hurry! + +[Almost pushes him out of the upper doors and closes them. He goes +quickly to the door on the right, opens it, and calls.] + +Ivanoff! + +[IVANOFF opens the door and comes out apprehensively.] + +IVANOFF [as he enters]. Have they come? + +PIKE. Not yet! Ivanoff, you prayed to see your wife and your friend +Glenwood before you went back to Siberia. + +IVANOFF [falling back with a cry]. Ah! + +PIKE. If that prayer is answered through me, will you promise to +remember that it's my fight? + +IVANOFF. Ah! it is impossible--you wish to play with me! + +PIKE. Do I look playful? + +[A bugle sounds sharply outside the window.] + +IVANOFF [wildly]. The carabiniere--for me. + +[The two rush together to the window.] + +PIKE [thrusting IVANOFF behind him]. Don't show yourself! + +IVANOFF. [looking out of the window over PIKE'S shoulder]. Look! Near +the lamp yonder--there by the doors--the carabiniere. + +PIKE. They've been there since this afternoon. + +[Shading his eyes from the light of the room with one hand.] + +Look there--who on earth--who's that they've got with them?--Why, good +Lord! it's Doc! + +[Astounded.] + +IVANOFF. It is Herr von Groellerhagen! Did I not tell you he was a +Russian? He has betrayed me himself. He was not satisfied that others +should. [Bitterly.] I knew I was in the wolf's throat here! + +PIKE. Don't you believe it! They've arrested poor old Doc. They got him +as he went out. + +IVANOFF [pointing]. No; they speak respectfully to him. They bow to +him-- + +PIKE [grimly]. They'll be bowing to us in a minute. That's probably the +way these colonels run you in. + +[Sharp knock on upper doors.] + +PIKE [urging him toward the door on the right]. You wait till I call +you, and remember it's my fight. + +IVANOFF [turning, half hysterically]. You _promise_ before I am taken +that I shall see-- + +[MARIANO enters at upper doors.] + +PIKE [domineeringly, as he sees MARIANO]. And don't you forget what I've +been telling you--you get the sand out of that gear-box first thing +tomorrow morning, or I'll see that you draw your last pay Saturday +night. + +[IVANOFF bows meekly and exit to right, closing door after him.] + +MARIANO. Miss Granger-Seempson! + +[Exit.] + +PIKE. All right, Mariano! + +[ETHEL enters haughtily.] + +I'm much obliged to you for taking my note the right way. I've got some +pretty good reasons for not leaving this room. + +[She is icy in manner, but her hands fidget with the note he has sent +her, crumpling it up.] + +ETHEL [sitting]. Your note seemed so extraordinarily urgent-- + +PIKE. It had to be. Some folks who want to see me are coming here, and I +want you to see them--here. They'd stopped you from coming if they +could. + +ETHEL [holding herself very straight in her chair]. There was no effort +to prevent me. + +PIKE. No; I didn't give 'em time. + +ETHEL. May I ask to whom you refer? + +PIKE. The whole kit and boodle of 'em! + +ETHEL [not relaxing her coldness]. You are inelegant, Mr. Pike. + +PIKE. I haven't time to be elegant, even if I knew how. + +ETHEL. Do you mean that my chaperone would disapprove? + +PIKE. I shouldn't be surprised. I reckon the whole fine flower of Europe +would disapprove. "Disapprove?"--they'd _sand-bag_ you to keep you away! + +ETHEL [rising quickly]. Oh, then I can't stay. + +PIKE [going between her and the upper doors, speaks with ring of +domination]. Yes you can, and you will, and you've got to! + +ETHEL [angrily]. "Got to!" I shall not! + +PIKE. I'm your guardian, and you'll do as I say. You'll obey me this +once if you never do again. + +[She looks at him defiantly; he faces her with determination, and +continues without pause.] + +You'll stay here while I talk to these people, and you'll stay in spite +of anything they say or do to make you go. + +[Slight pause; she yields and walks back to her chair. PIKE continues.] + +God knows I hate to talk rough to you. I wouldn't hurt your feelings for +the world, but it's come to a point where I've got to use the authority +I have over you. + +ETHEL [with a renewal of her defiance]. Authority? Do you think-- + +PIKE. You'll stay here for the next twenty minutes if I have to make +Crecy and Agincourt look like a Peace Conference! + +[She looks at him aghast, sinks into chair by table; he continues after +a very slight pause.] + +You and your brother have soaked up a society-column notion of life +over here; you're like old Pete Delaney of Terry Hut--he got so he'd +drink cold tea if there was a whiskey label on the bottle. They've +fuddled you with labels. It's my business to see that you know what kind +of people you're dealin' with. + +ETHEL [almost in tears]. You're bullying me! I don't see why you talk so +brutally to me. + +PIKE [sadly and earnestly]. Do you think I'd do it for anything but you? + +ETHEL [angrily]. You are odious! Insufferable! + +PIKE [humbly]. Don't you think I know you despise me? + +ETHEL. I do not despise you; if I had stayed at home, and grown up +there, I should probably have been a provincial young woman playing +"Sweet Genevieve" for you to-night. But my life has not been that, and +you have humiliated me from the moment of your arrival here. You have +made me ashamed both of you and of myself. And now you have some +preposterous plan which will shame me again, humiliate both of us once +more, before my friends, these gentlefolk. + +[A loud noise without. LADY CREECH'S voice is heard shouting.] + +PIKE [dryly]. I think the gentlefolk are here. + +[The upper doors up centre are thrown open; LADY CREECH hurriedly +enters, with MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY and HORACE, followed by ALMERIC.] + +LADY CREECH. My dear child, what are you doing in this dreadful place +with this dreadful person? + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY. My dear, les convenances! + +HORACE. Ethel, I'm extremely surprised; come away at once! + +ALMERIC. Oh, I say, you know, really, Miss Ethel! You can't stay here, +you know, _can_ you? + +PIKE. I'm her guardian; she's here by my authority, she'll stay by my +authority. + +[LORD HAWCASTLE appears in the open doors and bows sardonically to +PIKE.] + +HAWCASTLE [suavely]. Ah, good-evening, Mr. Pike! + +HORACE. Lord Hawcastle, will you insist upon Ethel's leaving? It's quite +on the cards we shall have a disagreeable scene here. + +HAWCASTLE [smiling]. I see no occasion for it; we're here simply for Mr. +Pike's answer. He knows where we stand and we know where he stands. + +PIKE [with a grim smile]. I reckon you're right so far. + +HAWCASTLE [continuing]. And his answer will be yes. + +PIKE [with quiet emphasis]. But you're wrong there! + +HAWCASTLE [to HORACE, with sudden seriousness]. Perhaps you are right, +Mr. Granger-Simpson. Painful things may be done. Better the young lady +were spared them. Take your sister away. + +[He motions HORACE toward the door.] + +ALMERIC. For God's sake do--it may be quite rowdy. + +LADY CREECH [to ETHEL at the same time]. My dear, you positively must! + +HORACE. Ethel, I command you! + +[ETHEL, troubled, half rises as if to go] + +PIKE [imperiously, to ETHEL]. You stay right where you are! + +ALMERIC [angrily]. Oh, I say! + +LADY CREECH. Oh, the lynching ruffian! + +HORACE. Ethel, do you mean to let this fellow dictate to you? + +ETHEL [breathlessly and loudly, as if resistance were hopeless]. +But--he says I _must_! + +[She sinks back into her chair.] + +PIKE [to HAWCASTLE]. You're here for an answer, you say? + +HAWCASTLE [on the defensive]. Yes! + +PIKE. An answer to what? + +HAWCASTLE [painfully resuming his suavity]. An answer to our request +that you accede to the wishes of that young lady. + +PIKE. And if I don't, what are you going to do? + +HORACE. Ethel, you _must_ go! + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY. This man is an Apache! + +LADY CREECH [simultaneously]. Barbarian! + +PIKE [to HAWCASTLE]. I'll leave it to you to tell her. + +HAWCASTLE. A gentleman would spare her that. + +PIKE. _I_ won't! Speak out! Why do you come here sure of the answer you +want? + +HAWCASTLE [intensely annoyed]. Tut, tut! + +LADY CREECH. Don't mumble your words! + +PIKE. I'll make it even plainer than you like. + +HORACE. I protest against this! + +ALMERIC. Throw the rotter out of the window! + +PIKE [particularly addressing ETHEL]. This afternoon I tried to help a +poor devil--a broken-down Russian running away from Siberia, where he'd +been for nine years. + +[She rises; her eyes eagerly meet his.] + +A poor weak thing, hounded like you've seen a rat in the gutter by dogs +and bootblacks. Some of your friends here saw us bring him into this +apartment; they know we've got him here now. If I don't agree to hand +over you and seven hundred and fifty thousand dollars of the money John +Simpson made, it means that the man I have tried to help goes back to +rot in Siberia and I go to an Italian jail for two years, or as much +longer as they can make it. + +HAWCASTLE [violently]. Nonsense! + +ETHEL [stepping toward PIKE, indignantly]. I knew that you had only a +further humiliation in store for me-- + +HAWCASTLE [following her and trying to interrupt]. But my dear-- + +ETHEL [with dignity]. No--you need make no denial for yourselves. + +[To PIKE, haughtily.] + +Do you think I would believe that an English noble would stoop-- + +PIKE [with passionate indignation]. Stoop! Why, ten years ago in St. +Petersburg there was a poor revolutionist who, in his crazy patriotism, +took government money for the cause he believed in. He made the mistake +of keeping that money in his house, when this man [pointing at +HAWCASTLE] knew it was there. He also made the mistake of having a wife +that this man coveted and stole--as he coveted and stole the money. Oh, +he made a good job of it! Don't think that to-night is the first time he +has given information to the police. He did it then, and the husband +went to Siberia-- + +HAWCASTLE [staggered and enraged]. A dastardly slander! + +PIKE [in a ringing voice].--and he'll do it again to-night. I go to an +Italian jail [he suddenly swings his outstretched hand to point to +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY, continuing without pause] and, by the living God, +that same poor devil of a husband goes back to Siberia! + +[MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY, with an ejaculation of horror and fright, staggers +back.] + +HAWCASTLE [in extreme agitation]. It's a ghastly lie! + +PIKE. You came for your answer. Here it is. + +[Calls sharply.] + +Ivanoff! + +[IVANOFF appears in the doorway on the right. He advances, lifts both +clinched fists above MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY'S head.] + +[MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY, with a shuddering cry, falls on her knees in an +attitude of fright and abasement.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY. Ivan!--oh, Mother of God!--Ivan! Don't kill me-- + +[IVANOFF shudders with weakness, trembles violently, collapses into +chair, she still at his feet. IVANOFF sobbing.] + +HORACE [starting toward her in extreme agitation]. Helene! + +PIKE [sternly to HORACE]. You keep back, she's his wife. + +[Pointing to HAWCASTLE.] + +And there stands his best friend! + +HAWCASTLE. It's a lie! I never saw the man before in my life. + +PIKE [grimly, with a gesture toward MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY]. The lady seems +to recognize him. + +HAWCASTLE. Almeric, go for the police. Call them quickly! + +[His voice loud and hoarse.] + +MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY [springs to her feet, protesting]. No--no--I can't! + +PIKE [with his hand on IVANOFF'S shoulder]. Call them in--we're ready. + +[To ETHEL.] + +But I want _you_ always to remember that I considered it cheap at the +price. + +[ETHEL, in an agony of shame, turns from him. At same time MADAME DE +CHAMPIGNY, never taking her eyes from IVANOFF'S face, and showing great +fear, moves back near HAWCASTLE.] + +ALMERIC [opening the upper doors and calling]. Tell that officer to +bring his men in here! + +[VASILI enters briskly from the hall.] + +[RIBIERE enters immediately after from the same direction.] + +VASILI [in a loud, clear voice]. There will be no arrests to-night, my +friends. + +HAWCASTLE [violently, to ALMERIC]. Do as I say! This man [meaning +VASILI] goes, too. + +VASILI [curtly]. The officer is not there, the carabiniere have been +withdrawn. + +[To PIKE, gravely and rapidly.] + +For your sake I have relinquished my incognito. + +[To HAWCASTLE.] + +The man Ivanoff is in my custody. + +[Illustration: "IVAN! DON'T KILL ME!"] + +HAWCASTLE [violently]. By whose authority? Do you know that you are +speaking to the Earl of Hawcastle? + +RIBIERE [in a ringing voice, advancing a step]. More respectful, sir! +You are addressing his Highness, the Grand-Duke Vasili of Russia. + +[HAWCASTLE falls back, stricken.] + +PIKE [thunderstruck]. Respectful! Think of what _I've_ been calling him! + +VASILI. My friend, it has been refreshing. [To RIBIERE]. Ribiere, I +shall take Ivanoff's statement in writing. Bring him with you. + +[VASILI turns on his heel, curtly, and passes rapidly out through the +door on the right.] + +[RIBIERE touches IVANOFF on shoulder, indicating that he must follow +VASILI.] + +[IVANOFF starts with RIBIERE; MADAME DE CHAMPIGNY shrinks back with a +low exclamation of fear.] + +IVANOFF [hoarsely to her]. I would not touch you--not even to strangle +you! + +[With outstretched hand, pointing to HAWCASTLE.] + +But God will let me pay my debt to the Earl of Hawcastle! + +[Goes rapidly out with RIBIERE.] + +HAWCASTLE [choked with rage, advancing on PIKE]. Why, you-- + +PIKE [genially]. Oh! I hated to hand you this, my lord. I didn't come +over here to make the fine flower of Europe any more trouble than +they've got. But I had to _show_ John Simpson's daughter. + +[Movement from HORACE and ETHEL.] + +And I reckon now she isn't wanting any alliance with the remnants of +Crecy and Agincourt. + +ETHEL [tremulously, coming close to PIKE]. But I have no choice--I gave +Almeric my promise when I thought it an honor to bear his name. Now that +you have shown me it is a _shame_ to bear it, the promise is only more +sacred. The shame is not _his_ fault. You--you--want me to +be--honorable--don't you? + +PIKE [after a long stare at her, speaks in a feeble voice, very slowly]. +Your father--and mother--_both_--came--from Missouri, didn't they? + + +END OF THE THIRD ACT + + + + +THE FOURTH ACT + + +SCENE: The same as in Act I. The morning of the next day. Upon the steps +leading to the hotel doors is a pile of bags, hat-boxes, and rugs. + +As the curtain rises HAWCASTLE, in a travelling suit and cap, is +directing a porter who is adjusting a strap on a travelling bag. ALMERIC +enters from the hotel, smoking a cigarette. + +ALMERIC. Ah, Governor; see you're moving! + +HAWCASTLE. I may. + +[His manner is nervous, apprehensive, and wary. Porter touches his cap +and goes into hotel.] + +It depends. + +ALMERIC. Depends? Madame de Champigny took the morning boat to Naples, +and your trunks are gone. Shouldn't say that looked much like dependin'. + +HAWCASTLE [nervously]. It does, though, with that devilish convict-- + +ALMERIC. Oh, but I say, Governor, you're not in a funk about him! You +could bowl him over with a finger. + +HAWCASTLE [glancing over his shoulder]. Not if he had what he didn't +have last night, or I shouldn't be here to-day. + +ALMERIC. You don't think the beggar'd be taking a shot at you? + +HAWCASTLE [fastening clasp of hat-box]. I don't know what the crazy fool +mightn't do. + +ALMERIC. But, you know, he's really quite as much in custody as you +could wish. That Vasilivitch chap has got him fast enough. + +[LADY CREECH enters from the hotel.] + +HAWCASTLE [sharply]. The Grand-Duke Vasili has the reputation of being a +romantic fool. I don't know what moment he may decide to let Ivanoff +loose. + +LADY CREECH [with triumphant indignation]. Then I have the advantage +over you, Hawcastle. He's just done it. + +HAWCASTLE [startled]. What? + +LADY CREECH [continuing]. Got him a pardon from Russia by telegraph. + +HAWCASTLE. You don't mean that! + +LADY CREECH. Ethel has just told me. + +HAWCASTLE. My God! + +[He springs forward and touches a bell on wall.] + +LADY CREECH. An outrage! Our plans all so horribly upset-- + +HAWCASTLE [turning and coming down steps]. No, they're not. + +[MARIANO appears in the doorway.] + +HAWCASTLE. Mariano, I'm off for Naples. Sharp's the word! + +MARIANO. It is too late for the boat, Milor'. You must drive to +Castellamare for the train. + +HAWCASTLE. There's a carriage waiting for me at the gate yonder. Get +these things into it quick--quick! + +[MARIANO beckons porters from the hotel. Porters enter sharply and carry +bags, etc., off.] + +[Meanwhile, HAWCASTLE, without pause, continues rapidly and in an +excited voice to ALMERIC and LADY CREECH.] + +You must see it through; you mustn't let the thing fail; what's more, +you've got to hurry it, just as if I were here. This girl gave her word +last night that she'd stick. + +LADY CREECH. But she's behaving very peculiarly this morning. +Outrageously would be nearer it. + +HAWCASTLE. How? + +LADY CREECH. Shedding tears over this Ivanoff's story. What's more, she +has sent that dreadful Pike person to him with assistance. + +HAWCASTLE. What sort of assistance? + +LADY CREECH. Money. I don't know how much, but I'm sure it was a lot. + +ALMERIC [with a sudden inspiration]. By Jove! Buying the beggar off, +perhaps, to keep him from making a scandal for us. + +HAWCASTLE [excitedly]. That's what she's trying to do! + +LADY CREECH. Then why do you go? + +HAWCASTLE. Because I'm not sure she can. [Going to steps.] Wire me at +the Bertolini, Naples. [Turning at stoop.] This shows she means to +stick. + +LADY CREECH. For the sake of her promise. + +HAWCASTLE [emphatically]. Yes, and for the sake of the name. + +[He runs out rapidly.] + +[PIKE enters from the grove, smoking.] + +PIKE [thoughtfully]. Your pa seems in a hurry. + +[LADY CREECH and ALMERIC turn, startled. LADY CREECH haughtily sweeps +away, entering the hotel.] + +ALMERIC [cheerfully]. Oh yes, possibly--he's off, you know--to catch a +train. He's so easily worried by trifles. + +[PIKE looks at ALMERIC with a sort of chuckling admiration.] + +PIKE. Well, you don't worry--not too easy; do you, son? + +ALMERIC. Oh, one finds nothing in particular this morning to bother one. + +PIKE [assenting]. Nothing at all. + +ALMERIC. Not I. Of course, Miss Ethel is standing to her promise? + +PIKE [grimly]. Yes, she is. + +ALMERIC. The Governor only thought it best to clear out a bit until we +were certain that she manages to draw off this convict chap. + +PIKE [puzzled]. Draw him off? + +ALMERIC. What you Americans call "affixing him," isn't it? + +PIKE. "Affixing him?" Don't try to talk United States, my son. Just tell +me in your own way. + +ALMERIC. She's been giving him money, hasn't she? You took it to him +yourself, didn't you? Naturally, we understood what it was for. She's +trying to keep the beggar quiet. + +PIKE. So that's what she sent this poor cuss the money for, was it? + +ALMERIC. Why, what other reason could there be? + +PIKE. Well, you know I sort of gathered it was because she was sorry for +him--thought he'd been wronged; but, of course, I'm stupid. + +ALMERIC. Well, ra-_ther_! I don't know that it was so necessary for her +to hush him up, but it showed a very worthy intention in her, didn't it? + +PIKE [slowly]. Would you mind my being present when you thank her for +it? + +ALMERIC. Shouldn't in the least if I intended thanking her. It simply +shows she considers herself already one of us. It's perfectly +plain--why, it's plain as _you_ are! + +[Chuckles.] + +PIKE. Oh! if I could only get it over to Kokomo! And that's why you're +not worrying, is it, son? + +ALMERIC. Worrying? My good man, do you mind excusing me. I saw a most +likely pup yesterday; I'm afraid some other chap'll snatch him up before +I do. I should have taken him at once. Good-morning! + +[Exit through the grove with a sprightly gait and a wave of his stick.] + +[PIKE gazes after him, shaking his head with a half-admiring, +half-sardonic chuckle.] + +[Enter ETHEL from the hotel. She wears a pretty morning dress and hat; +her face is very sad.] + +ETHEL. I hear that Lord Hawcastle has left the hotel. + +PIKE [dryly]. Yes; I saw him go. + +ETHEL. He left very quickly? + +PIKE. He did seem to be forgetting the scenery. + +ETHEL [decidedly]. He was afraid of Ivanoff. + +PIKE. I shouldn't be surprised. Ivanoff wants to thank you. May I bring +him? + +ETHEL. Yes. + +[PIKE goes off into the grove.] + +[MARIANO and a file of servants enter from the hotel, form a line, and +bow profoundly as VASILI enters. They withdraw at a sign from him.] + +ETHEL [making a deep curtsy]. Monseigneur! + +VASILI [to ETHEL]. Not _you_! You see, I must fly to some place where an +incognito will be respected. If I stay here it will be--what you +call--fuss and feathers and revolutionary agents. I have come to make +my adieu to your guardian. Incognito or out of it, he is my very good +friend--no matter if he is an egoist. + +ETHEL. An egoist! That is the last thing in the world he should be +called. + +VASILI. Ah, so; what do you call him? + +ETHEL. I? I call him-- + +[She begins bravely, but at a keen glance from him stops abruptly, +blushing.] + +VASILI. Bravo! I call him an egoist because he is so content to be what +he is he will not pretend to be something else! I respect your country +in him, my dear young lady; and he cares nothing whether I am a king or +a commoner. Everywhere the people bow and salaam half on their knees to +me; but _he_-- + +ETHEL. No, I can't quite imagine _him_ doing that. + +[Enter PIKE from the grove, followed by IVANOFF.] + +VASILI [to PIKE]. I have come to bid you goodbye, my friend. Life is a +service of farewells, they say; but if you ever come to St. Petersburg +when I am there you will be made welcome. Your ambassador will tell you +where to find me. + +PIKE. I know I'd be welcome; and if you ever get out as far as Indiana, +don't miss Kokomo--the depot hackman will tell you where to find me, and +the boys will help me show you a good time. You'd like it, Doc-- + +[He stops, horrified at his slip of the tongue.] + +VASILI. I _know_ that. + +PIKE. I don't know how to call you by name, but I reckon you'll +understand I do think an awful lot of you. + +VASILI [as they shake hands]. My friend, I have confided to you that you +are a great man. But a great man is sure to be set upon a pedestal by +some pretty lady. [ETHEL turns away.] It is a great responsibility to +occupy a pedestal. On that account I depart in some anxiety for you. + +PIKE. What do you mean? + +VASILI. Ah, you do not understand? Then, my friend--what is it you have +taught me to say?--ah, yes--then there is sand in your gear-box. + +[VASILI gives his hand to IVANOFF quietly, bows deeply to ETHEL, and +goes quickly into the hotel.] + +IVANOFF [turning to ETHEL]. Dear, kind young lady, your guardian has +known how to make me accept the help you granted. He has known how +because his heart is like yours, full of goodness. I shall go to London +and teach the languages. There I shall be able to repay you--at least +what you have given me in money. + +ETHEL. Professor Ivanoff, are you following Lord Hawcastle and your +wife? + +IVANOFF. My wife exists no longer for me. + +ETHEL. But Lord Hawcastle? Do you mean to follow him? + +IVANOFF [with great feeling]. No, no, no! I could not hurt his body--I +could not. The suffering of a man is here--here! What is it _he_ has of +most value in this world? It is that name of his. Except for that, he is +poor, and that I shall destroy. He shall not go in his clubs; he shall +not go among his own class, and in the streets they will point at him. +His story and mine shall be made--ah, but too well known! And that name +of which he and all his family have been so proud, it shall be disgrace +and dishonor to bear. + +ETHEL [sadly]. Already it is that. + +IVANOFF. But I forget myself. I talk so ugly. + +ETHEL. It is not in my heart to blame you. Your wrongs have given you +the right. + +IVANOFF [kissing her hand]. God bless you always! + +[Illustration: "MY FRIEND, THERE IS SAND IN YOUR GEAR-BOX"] + +[He takes PIKE'S hand, tries to speak, but chokes up and cannot. He +goes into the hotel.] + +PIKE. There _are_ some good people over here, aren't there? + +ETHEL. When you're home again I hope you will remember _them._ + +PIKE. I will. + +ETHEL. And I hope you will forget everything I've ever said. + +PIKE. Somehow it doesn't seem as if I very likely would. + +ETHEL [coming toward him]. Oh yes, you will! All those unkind things +I've said to you-- + +PIKE. Oh, I'll forget _those_ easy! + +ETHEL [going on eagerly, but almost tearfully]. And the other things, +too, when you're once more among your kind, good home folks you like so +well--and probably there's one among them that you'll be so glad to get +back to you'll hardly know you've been away--an unworldly girl--[she +falters]--one that doesn't need to be cured--oh! of all sorts of +follies--a kind girl, one who's been always sweet to you. [Turns away +from him.] I can see her--she wears a white muslin and waits by the gate +for you at twilight [turns to him again]--isn't she like that? + +PIKE [shaking his head gravely]. No; not like that. + +ETHEL. But there _is_ some one there?--some one that you've cared for? + +PIKE [sadly]. Well, she's only been there in a way. I've had her picture +on my desk for a good while. Sometimes when I go home in the evening she +kind of seems to be there. I bought a homey old house up on Main Street, +you know; it's the house you were born in. It's kind of lonesome +sometimes, and then I get to thinking that she's there, sitting at an +old piano, that used to be my mother's, and singing to me-- + +ETHEL [smiling sorrowfully]. Singing "Sweet Genevieve"? + +PIKE. Yes--that's my favorite. But then I come to and I find it ain't +so, no voice comes to me, and I find there ain't anybody but me +[swallows painfully], and it's so foolish that even Jim Cooley can write +me letters making fun of it! + +ETHEL. You'll find her some day--you'll find some one to fulfil that +vision--and I shall think of you in your old house among the +beech-trees. I shall think of you often with her, listening to her voice +in the twilight. And I shall be far away from that sensible, kindly +life--keeping the promise that I have made [falters], and living out--my +destiny. + +PIKE [gravely]. What destiny? + +ETHEL. I am bound to Almeric in his misfortune, I am bound to him _by_ +his misfortune. + +[She goes on with a sorrowful eagerness.] + +He has to bear a name that will be a by-word of disgrace, and it is my +duty to help him bear it, to help him make it honorable again; to +inspire him in the struggle that lies before him to rise above it by his +own efforts, to make a career for himself; to make the world forget the +disgrace of his father in his own triumphs--in the product of his own +work-- + +PIKE [aghast]. Work! + +ETHEL. Oh, I am all American to-day. No matter how humbly he begins, it +will be a beginning, and no matter what it costs me I must be by his +side helping him, with all my energy and strength. Can you challenge +that? Isn't it true? + +PIKE. I can't deny it--that's what any good and brave woman ought to +feel. + +ETHEL. And since it has to be done, it must be done at once. I haven't +seen Almeric since last night; I must see him now. + +PIKE [grimly]. He's not here just now. + +[HORACE enters; stands in the doorway unobserved, listening.] + +ETHEL. I've shirked facing him to-day. He has always been so light and +gay, I have dreaded to see him bending under this blow, shamed and +overcome. Now it is my duty to see him, to show him how he can hold up +his head in spite of it! + +PIKE. I agree, it's your duty-- + +ETHEL [eagerly, but tremulously]. That means that you--as my +guardian--think I am right? + +PIKE. I agree to it, I said. + +ETHEL [excited]. Then that must mean that you consent-- + +PIKE. It does--I give my consent to your marriage. + +ETHEL [shocked and frightened]. You _do_? + +PIKE. I place it in your hands. + +HORACE [vehemently interrupting]. I protest against this. She's talking +like a romantic schoolgirl. And I for one won't bear it--and I won't +allow it! + +ETHEL. Too late--he's consented. + +[With a half-choked, sudden sob she runs into the hotel.] + +HORACE [turning furiously on PIKE]. I tell you I shall not permit her to +throw herself away! + +PIKE. Look here, who's the guardian of this girl? + +HORACE. A magnificent guardian you are! You came here to protect her +from something you thought rotten; now we all know it's rotten, you hand +her over! + +[Turns with a short, bitter laugh, walks up stage, then comes back.] + +By Jove! I shouldn't be surprised if you consent to the settlement, too! + +PIKE [solemnly]. My son, I shouldn't be surprised if I did. + +HORACE. Is the world topsy-turvy? Have I gone crazy? + +[With accusing finger pointed at PIKE.] + +I'll bet my _soul_ that'll disgust her as much as it does me! + +PIKE. My son, I shouldn't be surprised if it would. + +HORACE [staring at him]. By the Lord, but you play a queer game, Mr. +Pike! + +PIKE. Oh, I'm jest crossing the Rubicon. Your father used to have a +saying: "If you're going to cross the Rubicon, cross it. Don't wade out +to the middle and _stand_ there; you only get hell from both banks." + +[Enter LADY CREECH from the hotel.] + +LADY CREECH [testily]. Mr. Granger-Simpson, have you seen my nephew? + +HORACE. No; I've rather avoided that, if you don't mind my saying so. + +LADY CREECH. Mr. Granger-Simpson! + +HORACE. I'm sorry, Lady Creech, but I've had a most awful shaking-up, +and I'm almost thinking of going back home with Mr. Pike. I rather think +he's about right in his ideas. You know we abused him, not only for +himself, but for his vulgar friend; yet his vulgar friend turned out to +be a grand-duke--and look at what our friends turned out to be. + +[Goes rapidly into the hotel.] + +[ALMERIC'S voice is heard from the grove. "Come along! There's a good +fellow!"] + +LADY CREECH. Isn't that Almeric? + +PIKE. Here he comes, shamed and bending under the blow! + +[ALMERIC enters from the grove, leading a bull terrier pup.] + +ALMERIC. Mariano, Mariano--I say, Mariano! I say, Aunty, ain't he +rippin'? Lucky I got there just as I did--a bounder wanted to buy him +five minutes later. + +[MARIANO enters from hotel.] + +Mariano, do you think you could be trusted to wash him? + +MARIANO. Wash him! + +ALMERIC. Tepid water, you know; and mind he doesn't take cold; and just +a little milk afterward--nothing else but milk, you understand. You be +deuced careful, I mean to say. + +MARIANO [with dignity]. I will give him to the porter. + +[He carries the animal into the hotel.] + +LADY CREECH. Almeric, really, there are more important things, you know. + +ALMERIC. But you don't seem to realize I might have missed him +altogether. I think I'm rather to be congratulated, you know. What? + +PIKE. I think you are, my son. I have given my consent. + +ALMERIC. Rippin'! + +LADY CREECH. And the settlement? + +PIKE. The settlement also--everything! + +[ETHEL enters from the hotel, followed by HORACE.] + +LADY CREECH [greatly relieved and overjoyed, starting toward ETHEL]. +Ethel, my dear! + +ALMERIC [cheerfully]. I told you it would all be plain sailing, Aunty. +There was nothing to worry about. + +LADY CREECH [continuing, to ETHEL]. All shall be forgiven, my child. I +am too pleased, too overjoyed in your good-fortune to remember any +little bickerings between us. The sky has cleared wonderfully. +Everything is settled. + +ETHEL. Yes; it's all over; my guardian has consented. + +ALMERIC. Of course _I_ never worried about it--but I fancy it will be a +weight off the Governor's mind. I'll see that a wire catches him at +Naples--and he'll be glad to know what became of that arrangement about +the convict fellow, too. + +ETHEL [very seriously]. Almeric, I think it's noble to be brave in +trouble, but-- + +ALMERIC [puzzled]. I say, you know, you've really _got_ me! + +ETHEL. I mean that I admire you for your pluck, for seeming unconcerned +under disgrace, but-- + +ALMERIC. _Disgrace_? Why, who's disgraced--not even the Governor, as I +see it. You got that chap called off, didn't you? + +ETHEL. Whom do you mean? + +ALMERIC. Why, that convict chap--didn't you send him away? You bought +him off, didn't you, so that he won't talk? Gave him money not to bother +us? + +ETHEL [rising, and turning on him indignantly]. Why, Heaven pity you! Do +you think that? + +ALMERIC. Oh--what?--he wouldn't agree to be still? Oh, I say, that'll +be rather a pill for the Governor--he'll be a bit worried, you know. + +ETHEL. Don't you see that it's time for you to worry a little for +yourself? That you've got to begin at once to do something worthy that +will obliterate this shame--to begin a career--to work--to work! + +ALMERIC [puzzled]. But? But I mean to say, though--but what _for_? What +possible need will there be for an extreme like that? Don't you see, in +the first place, there's the settlement-- + +ETHEL [aghast]. Settlement! You talk of settlement, _now_. + +LADY CREECH [angrily]. Settlement, _certainly_ there's the settlement! + +ETHEL. What for? + +LADY CREECH. Why, don't you understand--you're to be the Countess of +Hawcastle, aren't you? + +ALMERIC. Why--hasn't he told you?--the only obstacle on earth between us +was this fellow's consent to the settlement, and he's just given it. + +ETHEL [dazed and angry]. Do you mean to say he's consented to that! + +ALMERIC. Why, to be sure--he's just consented with his own lips--didn't +you? + +PIKE [gravely]. I did. + +LADY CREECH. Don't you see, don't you hear that--he's consented? He +didn't mumble his words--don't you hear him? + +ETHEL. I do, and disbelieve my own ears. Yesterday, when I wanted +something I thought of value--and that was a name--he refused to let me +buy it--to-day, when I know that that name is less than nothing, worse +than nothing--he bids me give my fortune for it. What manner of man is +this! And _you_ [to LADY CREECH and ALMERIC], what are you that after +last night you come to me and ask a settlement? + +LADY CREECH [angrily]. Certainly we do--would you expect to enter a +family like this and bring nothing? + +ALMERIC. _I_ can't see that the situation has changed since yesterday. I +don't stick out for the precise amount the Governor said. If it ought to +be less on account of that little affair last night--why, we should be +the last people in the world to haggle over a few thousand pounds-- + +ETHEL [with a cry of rage and relief]. Oh! That is the final word of my +humiliation! I felt that you were in shame and dishonor, and, because of +that, I was ready to keep my word--to stand by you, to help you make +yourself into something like a man--to give my life to you. That you +permitted the sacrifice was enough! Now you ask me to PAY for the +privilege of making it, I am released! I am free! _I am not that man's +property to give away!_ + +LADY CREECH [violently]. You're beside yourself. Isn't this what we've +been wanting all the time? + +ALMERIC. But slow up a bit--didn't you say you'd stick? + +ETHEL. Any promise I ever made to you is a thousand times cancelled. +This is final! + +[With concentrated rage, turning to PIKE.] + +And as for you--never presume to speak to me again! + +ALMERIC [to LADY CREECH]. Most extraordinary girl--she's rather +dreadful, _isn't_ she? + +LADY CREECH [with agitation]. Give me your arm, Almeric. + +[They go into the hotel.] + +ETHEL [to PIKE]. What have you to say to me? + +[PIKE raises his hands slowly, with palms outward, and drops them.] + +ETHEL. What explanation have you to make? + +PIKE. None. + +ETHEL. That's because you don't care what I think of you. [Bitterly.] +Indeed, you've already shown that, when you were willing to give me up +to those people, and to let me pay them for taking me! You let me +romanticize to you about honor and duty and sympathy--about my efforts +to make that creature a man--and you pretended to sympathize with me, +and you knew all the time it was only the money they were after! + +PIKE [humbly]. Well, I shouldn't be surprised. + +ETHEL. Didn't you have the faint little understanding of me enough to +see that their asking for money, now--would horrify me? Didn't you know +that your consenting to it, leaving me free to give it to them, would +release me--make me free to deny everything to them? + +PIKE [slowly]. Well, I shouldn't be surprised if I _had_ seen that. + +ETHEL [staggered]. You mean you've been saving me again from myself, +from my silliness, from my romanticism, that you've given me another +revelation of the falsity, the unreality of my attitude toward these +people, and toward life. + +PIKE [placatingly]. No, no! + +ETHEL [vehemently]. You'd always say that, you'd always deny it--it's +like you. You let me make a fool of myself and then you show it to me, +and after that you deny it! [Angrily.] You're always exhibiting your +superiority! Would you do that to the dream girl you told me of, to the +girl at home who plays dream songs for you in the empty house among the +beeches? Do you think _any_ girl could love a man for that? Go back to +your dream girl, your lady of the picture! + +PIKE [disconsolately]. She won't be there. + +ETHEL [stubbornly]. She _might_ be. + +PIKE. No, there ain't any chance of that. The house will still be empty. + +ETHEL [almost crying]. Are you _sure_? + +PIKE [sadly]. There ain't any doubt of it now. + +ETHEL. You might be wrong--for once! + +[She gives him a look between tears and laughter, then runs into the +hotel.] + +[PIKE stands sadly, his head bent, every line of his body expressing +dejection; then from within the hotel come the sounds of a piano in the +preliminary chords of "Sweet Genevieve." ETHEL'S voice is lifted in the +song, at first faint, somewhat tremulous and quavering, then rising +strongly and confidently. PIKE'S face, slowly upraised, becomes +transfigured. He crosses the stage spellbound, to the hotel door with +the look of a man in a dream. He falls back a step, looking in.] + + + +***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MAN FROM HOME*** + + +******* This file should be named 15855.txt or 15855.zip ******* + + +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: +https://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/1/5/8/5/15855 + + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, +set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to +copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to +protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. Project +Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you +charge for the eBooks, unless you receive specific permission. 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