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+Project Gutenberg Etext of A Unique Story of a Marvellous Career
+Life of Hon. Phineas T. Barnum, by Joel Benton.
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+A Unique Story of a Marvellous Career. Life of Hon. Phineas T.
+Barnum, by Joel Benton.
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+by Joel Benton
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+December, 1998  [Etext #1576]
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+A UNIQUE STORY OF A MARVELLOUS CAREER.
+LIFE OF Hon. PHINEAS T. BARNUM. ----
+COMPRISING HIS BOYHOOD, YOUTH, ...
+
+By JOEL BENTON.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS.
+
+
+CHAPTER I. IN THE BEGINNING.
+Family and Birth--School Life--His First Visit to New York
+City--A Landed Proprietor--The Ethics of Trade--Farm Work and
+Keeping Store--Meeting-house and Sunday-school--"The One Thing
+Needful."
+
+CHAPTER II. EARLY YEARS AT BETHEL.
+Death of his Grandmother and Father--Left Penniless and
+Bare-footed--Work in a Store--His First Love--Trying to buy
+Russia--Uncle Bibbin's Duel
+
+CHAPTER III. BUSINESS LIFE
+Removal to Brooklyn--Smallpox--Goes Home to Recover His
+Health--Renewed Acquaintance with the Pretty Tailoress--First
+Independent Business Venture--Residence in New York--Return to
+Bethel--Anecdotes
+
+CHAPTER IV. TRYING MANY VENTURES.
+Visit to Pittsburg--Successful Lottery Business--Marriage--First
+Editorial Venture--Libel Suit--Imprisonment and
+Liberation--Removal to New York--Hard Times--Keeping a Boarding
+House
+
+CHAPTER V. BEGINNING AS A SHOWMAN.
+Finding His True Vocation--The Purchase of Joice Heth--Evidence
+as to Her Age--Her Death--Signor Vivalla--Visit to
+Washington--Joining a Travelling Circus--Controversies with
+Ministers--The Victim of a Practical Joke
+
+CHAPTER VI. INCIDENTS OF A CIRCUS TOUR.
+Beating a Landlord--A Joke on Turner--Barnum as a Preacher and as
+a Negro Minstrel--A Bad Man with a Gun--Dealing with a
+Sheriff--"Lady Hayes"--An Embarrassed Juggler--Barnum as a
+Matrimonial Agent
+
+CHAPTER VII. HARD TIMES.
+Advertising for a Partner--"Quaker Oats"--Diamond the Dancer--A
+Dishonest Manager--Return to New York--From Hand to Mouth--The
+American Museum
+
+CHAPTER VIII. THE AMERICAN MUSEUM.
+Advertising Extraordinary--A Quick-witted Performer--Niagara
+Falls with Real Water--Other Attractions--Drummond Light
+
+CHAPTER IX. INCREASED POPULARITY OF THE MUSEUM.
+The American Flag and St. Paul's--St. Patrick's Day--The Baby
+Show--Grand Buffalo Hunt--N. P. Willis--The First Wild West Show
+
+CHAPTER X. GIANTS AND DWARFS.
+Science for the Public--Mesmerism Extraordinary--Killing off a
+Rival--The Two Giants--Discovery of "Tom Thumb"--Seeking Other
+Worlds to Conquer--First Visit to England
+
+CHAPTER XI. TOM THUMB IN LONDON.
+An Aristocratic Visitor--Calling at Buckingham Palace and
+Hobnobbing with Royalty--Getting a Puff in the "Court
+Circular"--The Iron Duke--A Great Social and Financial Success
+
+CHAPTER XII. IN FRANCE.
+Arrival in Paris--Visit to the Tuilleries--Longchamps--"Tom
+Ponce" all the Rage--Bonaparte and Louis Phillipi--Tour through
+France--Barnum's Purchase
+
+CHAPTER XIII. IN BELGIUM.
+Presented to King Leopold and the Queen--The General's Jewels
+stolen--The Field of Waterloo--An Accident--An Expensive
+Equipage--The Custom of the Country
+
+CHAPTER XIV. IN ENGLAND AGAIN.
+Egyptian Hall and the Zoological Garden--The Special
+Relics--Purchase of the Happy Family--Return to America
+
+CHAPTER XV. AT HOME.
+Partnership with Tom Thumb--Visit to Cuba--Iranistan, his Famous
+Palace at Bridgeport--Barnum's Game-Keeper and the Great Game
+Dinner--Frank Leslie
+
+CHAPTER XVI. JENNY LIND.
+A Daring Venture--Barnum's Ambassador--Unprecedented Terms
+offered--Text of the Contract--Hard Work to Raise the Guarantee
+Fund--Educating the American Mind to receive the Famous Singer
+
+CHAPTER XVII. ARRIVAL OF JENNY LIND.
+First Meeting with Barnum--Reception in New York--Poems in Her
+Honor--A Furore of Public Interest--Sale of Tickets for the First
+Concert--Barnum's Change in Terms--Ten Thousand Dollars for
+Charity--Enormous Success of the First Concert
+
+CHAPTER XVIII. CONTINUED TRIUMPH.
+Successful Advertising--The Responsibilities of Riches--Visit to
+Iranistan--Ovations at Boston, Philadelphia, Baltimore and
+Washington--Visit to Mt. Vernon--Charleston--Havana--Fredericka
+Brerner
+
+CHAPTER XIX. HAVANA.
+Conquest of the Habaneros--The Italian and his Dog--Mad
+Bennett--A Successful Ruse--Return to New Orleans--Ludicrous
+Incident--Up the Mississippi--Legerdemain
+
+CHAPTER XX. THE TRIALS OF AN IMPRESSARIO.
+St Louis--The Secretary's Little Game--Legal Advice--Smooth
+Waters Again--Barnum's Efforts Appreciated--An Extravagant
+Encomium
+
+CHAPTER XXI. CLOSING THE GRAND TOUR.
+April Fool Jokes at Nashville--A Trick at Cincinnati--Return to
+New York--Jenny Lind Persuaded to Leave Barnum--Financial Results
+of the Enterprise
+
+CHAPTER XXII. A FEW SIDE ISSUES.
+The Expedition to Ceylon--Harnessing an Elephant to a
+Plow--Barnum and Vanderbilt--The Talking Machine--A Fire at
+Iranistan--Mountain Grove Cemetery
+
+CHAPTER XXIII. SOME DOMESTIC ENTERPRISES.
+Putting a Pickpocket on Exhibition--Traveling Incognito--The
+Pequonnock Bank--The New York Crystal Palace--A Poem on an
+Incident at Iranistan
+
+CHAPTER XXIV. THE JEROME CLOCK COMPANY.
+Founding East Bridgeport--Growth of the City--The Jerome Clock
+Bubble--A Ruined Man--Paying Honest Debts--Down in the Depths
+
+CHAPTER XXV. THE WHEAT AND THE CHAFF.
+False and True Friends--Meeting of Bridgeport Citizens--Barnum's
+Letter--Tom Thumb's Offer--Shillaber's Poem--Barnum's Message to
+the Creditors of the Jerome Clock Company--Removal to New
+York--Beginning Life Anew at Forty-six
+
+CHAPTER XXVI. IDLENESS WITHOUT REST.
+Annoying Persecutions of Creditors--Summer on Long Island--The
+Black Whale Pays the Board Bill--The Wheeler & Wilson Company
+Remove to East Bridgeport--Setting Sail for England
+
+CHAPTER XXVII. A PROSPEROUS EXILE.
+His Successful Pupil--Making Many Friends in London--Acquaintance
+with Thackeray--A Comedy of Errors in a German Custom
+House--Aristocratic Patronage at Fashionable Resorts--Barnum's
+Impressions of Holland and the Dutch
+
+CHAPTER XXVIII. HOME AGAIN.
+A Jolly Voyage--Mock Trial on Shipboard--Barnum on Trial for His
+Life--Discomfited Witnesses and a Triumphant Prisoner--Fair
+Weather Friends--The Burning of Iranistan
+
+CHAPTER XXIX. THE ART OF MONEY GETTING.
+The Lecture Field--Success--Cambridge--Oxford--An Unique
+Entertainment--Barnum Equal to the Occasion--Invited to Stay a
+Week
+
+CHAPTER XXX. AN ENTERPRISING ENGLISHMAN.
+A New Friend--Dinner to Tom Thumb and Commodore Nutt--Measuring
+the Giant--The Two Engines
+
+CHAPTER XXXI. AT HOME AGAIN.
+The Clock Debts Paid--The Museum once more under Barnum's
+Management--Enthusiastic Reception--His Speech--Two Poems
+
+CHAPTER XXXII. THE STORY OF "GRIZZLY ADAMS."
+Barnum's Partnership with the Famous Bear Hunter--Fooling Him
+with the "Golden Pigeons"--Adams Earns $500 at Desperate
+Cost--Tricking Barnum out of a Fine Hunting Suit--Prosperity of
+the Museum--Visit of the Prince of Wales
+
+CHAPTER XXXIII. BUILDING A CITY.
+At Home Once More--Growth of East Bridgeport--Barnum's Offer to
+Men Wanting Homes of Their Own--Remarkable Progress of the
+Place--How the Streets were Named
+
+CHAPTER XXXIV.  A GREAT YEAR AT THE MUSEUM.
+Capturing and Exhibiting White Whales--Newspaper Comments--A
+Touching Obituary--The Great Behemoth--A Long "Last
+Week"--Commodore Nutt--Real Live Indians on Exhibition
+
+CHAPTER XXXV. GENERAL AND MRS. TOM THUMB.
+Miss Lavinia Warren--The Rivals--Miss Warren's Engagement to Tom
+Thumb--The Wedding--Grand Reception--Letter From a Would-be
+Guest, and Dr Taylor's Reply
+
+CHAPTER XXXVI. POLITICAL NOTES.
+Barnum Becomes a Republican--Illuminating the House of a
+Democrat--The Peace Meeting--Elected to the Legislature--War on
+the Railroads--Speech on the Amendment
+
+CHAPTER XXXVII. BURNING OF THE AMERICAN MUSEUM.
+How Barnum Received the Tidings--Humorous Description of the
+Fire--A Public Calamity--Greeley's Advice--Intention to
+Re-establish the Museum--Speech at Employees' Benefit
+
+CHAPTER XXXVIII. POLITICAL LIFE.
+In the Connecticut Legislature--The Great Railroad
+Fight--Barnum's Effective Stroke--Canvassing for a United States
+Senator--Barnum's Congressional Campaign--A Challenge that was
+not Accepted
+
+CHAPTER XXXIX. FIGHTING A NEWSPAPER.
+Disposing of the Lease of the Museum Site--The Bargain with Mr.
+Bennett--Barnum's Refusal to Back Out--A Long and Bitter War with
+"The Herald"--Action of the Other Managers--The Return of Peace
+
+CHAPTER XL. BRIDGEPORT.
+The Fight for the Establishment of Seaside Park--Laying out City
+Streets--Impatience with "Old Fogies"--Building a Seaside
+Home--Waldemere--A Home in New York City
+
+CHAPTER XLI. HONORS AND ADULATIONS.
+Second Marriage--The King of Hawaii--Elected Mayor of
+Bridgeport--Successful Tour of the Hippodrome--Barnum's
+Retirement from Office
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I. IN THE BEGINNING.
+
+FAMILY AND BIRTH--SCHOOL LIFE--HIS FIRST VISIT TO NEW YORK CITY
+--A LANDED PROPRIETOR--THE ETHICS OF TRADE--FARM WORK AND KEEPING
+STORE--MEETING-HOUSE AND SUNDAY SCHOOL--"THE ONE THING NEEDFUL."
+
+Among the names of great Americans of the nineteenth century
+there is scarcely one more familiar to the world than that of the
+subject of this biography. There are those that stand for higher
+achievement in literature, science and art, in public life and in
+the business world. There is none that stands for more notable
+success in his chosen line, none that recalls more memories of
+wholesome entertainment, none that is more invested with the
+fragrance of kindliness and true humanity. His career was, in a
+large sense, typical of genuine Americanism, of its enterprise
+and pluck, of its indomitable will and unfailing courage, of its
+shrewdness, audacity and unerring instinct for success.
+
+Like so many of his famous compatriots, Phineas Taylor Barnum
+came of good old New England stock. His ancestors were among the
+builders of the colonies of Massachusetts and Connecticut. His
+father's father, Ephraim Barnum, was a captain in the War of the
+Revolution, and was distinguished for his valor and for his
+fervent patriotism. His mother's father, Phineas Taylor, was
+locally noted as a wag and practical joker. His father, Philo
+Barnum, was in turn a tailor, a farmer, a storekeeper, and a
+country tavernkeeper, and was not particularly prosperous in any
+of these callings.
+
+Philo Barnum and his wife, Irena Taylor, lived at Bethel,
+Connecticut, and there, on July 5, 1810, their first child was
+born. He was named Phineas Taylor Barnum, after his maternal
+grandfather; and the latter, in return for the compliment,
+bestowed upon his first grandchild at his christening the
+title-deeds of a "landed estate," five acres in extent, known as
+Ivy Island, and situated in that part of, Bethel known as the
+"Plum Trees." Of this, more anon.
+
+In his early years the boy led the life of the average New
+England farmer's son of that period. He drove the cows to and
+from the pasture, shelled corn, weeded the garden, and "did up
+chores." As he grew older he rode the horse in plowing corn,
+raked hay, wielded the shovel and the hoe, and chopped wood. At
+six years old he began to go to school--the typical district
+school. "The first date," he once said, "I remember inscribing
+upon my writing-book was 1818." The ferule, or the birch-rod, was
+in those days the assistant schoolmaster, and young Barnum made
+its acquaintance. He was, however, an apt and ready scholar,
+particularly excelling in mathematics. One night, when he was ten
+years old, he was called out of bed by his teacher, who had made
+a wager with a neighbor that Barnum could calculate the number of
+feet in a load of wood in five minutes. Barnum did it in less
+than two minutes, to the delight of his teacher and the
+astonishment of the neighbor.
+
+At an early age he manifested a strong development of the good
+old Yankee organ of acquisitiveness. Before he was five years old
+he had begun to hoard pennies and "fourpences," and at six years
+old he was able to exchange his copper bits for a whole silver
+dollar, the possession of which made him feel richer than he ever
+felt afterward in all his life. Nor did he lay the dollar away in
+a napkin, but used it in business to gain more. He would get ten
+cents a day for riding a horse before the plow, and he would add
+it to his capital. On holidays other boys spent all their
+savings, but not so he. Such days were to him opportunities for
+gain, not for squandering. At the fair or training of troops, or
+other festivity, he would peddle candy and cakes, home-made, or
+sometimes cherry rum, and by the end of the day would be a dollar
+or two richer than at its beginning. "By the time I was twelve
+years old," he tells us, "I was the owner of a sheep and a calf,
+and should soon, no doubt, have become a small Croesus had not my
+father kindly permitted me to purchase my own clothing, which
+somewhat reduced my little store."
+
+At ten years of age, realizing himself to be a "landed
+proprietor" through the christening gift of his waggish
+grandsire, young Barnum set out to survey his estate, which he
+had not yet seen. He had heard much of "Ivy Island." His
+grandfather had often, in the presence of the neighbors, spoken
+of him as the richest child in the town, since he owned the whole
+of Ivy Island, the richest farm in the State. His parents hoped
+he would use his wealth wisely, and "do something for the family"
+when he entered upon the possession of it; and the neighbors were
+fearful lest he should grow too proud to associate with their
+children.
+
+The boy took all this in good faith, and his eager curiosity to
+behold his estate was greatly increased, and he asked his father
+to let him go thither. "At last," says Barnum, "he promised I
+should do so in a few days, as we should be getting some hay near
+'Ivy Island.' The wished-for day arrived, and my father told me
+that as we were to mow an adjoining meadow. I might visit my
+property in company with the hired man during the 'nooning.' My
+grandfather reminded me that it was to his bounty I was indebted
+for this wealth, and that had not my name been Phineas I might
+never have been proprietor of 'Ivy Island.' To this my mother
+added:
+
+" 'Now, Taylor, don't become so excited when you see your
+property as to let your joy make you sick, for remember, rich as
+you are, that it will be eleven years before you can come into
+possession of your fortune.'
+
+"She added much more good advice, to all of which I promised to
+be calm and reasonable, and not to allow my pride to prevent me
+from speaking to my brothers and sisters when I returned home.
+
+"When we arrived at the meadow, which was in that part of the
+'Plum Trees' known as 'East Swamp,' I asked my father where 'Ivy
+Island' was.
+
+" 'Yonder, at the north end of this meadow, where you see those
+beautiful trees rising in the distance.'
+
+"All the forenoon I turned grass as fast as two men could cut it,
+and after a hasty repast at noon, one of our hired men, a
+good-natured Irishman, named Edmund, took an axe on his shoulder
+and announced that he was ready to accompany me to 'Ivy Island.'
+We started, and as we approached the north end of the meadow we
+found the ground swampy and wet and were soon obliged to leap
+from bog to bog on our route. A mis-step brought me up to my
+middle in water, and to add to the dilemma a swarm of hornets
+attacked me. Attaining the altitude of another bog I was cheered
+by the assurance that there was only a quarter of a mile of this
+kind of travel to the edge of my property. I waded on. In about
+fifteen minutes more, after floundering through the morass, I
+found myself half-drowned, hornet-stung, mud covered, and out of
+breath, on comparatively dry land.
+
+" 'Never mind, my boy,' said Edmund, 'we have only to cross this
+little creek, and ye'll be upon your own valuable property.'
+
+"We were on the margin of a stream, the banks of which were
+thickly covered with alders. I now discovered the use of Edmund's
+axe, for he felled a small oak to form a temporary bridge to my
+'Island' property. Crossing over, I proceeded to the centre of my
+domain. I saw nothing but a few stunted ivies and straggling
+trees. The truth flashed upon me. I had been the laughing-stock
+of the family and neighborhood for years. My valuable 'Ivy
+Island' was an almost inaccessible, worthless bit of barren land,
+and while I stood deploring my sudden downfall, a huge black
+snake (one of my tenants) approached me with upraised head. I
+gave one shriek and rushed for the bridge.
+
+"This was my first and last visit to 'Ivy Island.' My father
+asked me 'how I liked my property?' and I responded that I would
+sell it pretty cheap."
+
+The year 1822 was a memorable one in his childhood's history. He
+was then about twelve years old. One evening, late in January,
+Daniel Brown, a cattle-drover, of Southbury, Connecticut, arrived
+at Bethel and stopped for the night at Philo Barnum's tavern. He
+had with him some fat cattle, which he was driving to the New
+York markets; and he wanted both to add to his drove of cattle
+and to get a boy to help him drive them. Our juvenile hero heard
+him say this, and forthwith made application for the job. His
+father and mother gave their consent, and a bargain was quickly
+closed with the drover.
+
+"At daylight next morning," Barnum himself has related, "I
+started on foot in the midst of a heavy snow-storm to help drive
+the cattle. Before reaching Ridgefield I was sent on horseback
+after a stray ox, and, in galloping, the horse fell and my ankle
+was sprained. I suffered severely, but did not complain lest my
+employer should send me back. We arrived at New York in three or
+four days, and put up at the Bull's Head Tavern, where we were to
+stay a week while the drover disposed of his cattle. It was an
+eventful week for me. Before I left home my mother had given me a
+dollar, which I supposed would supply every want that heart could
+wish."
+
+His first outlay was for oranges. "I was told," he says, "that
+they were four pence apiece, and as four pence in Connecticut was
+six cents, I offered ten cents for two oranges, which was of
+course readily taken; and thus, instead of saving two cents, as I
+thought, I actually paid two cents more than the price demanded.
+I then bought two more oranges, reducing my capital to eighty
+cents. Thirty-one cents was the charge for a small gun which
+would 'go off' and send a stick some little distance, and this
+gun I bought. Amusing myself with this toy in the bar-room of the
+Bull's Head, the arrow happened to hit the bar-keeper, who
+forthwith came from behind the counter and shook me, and soundly
+boxed my ears, telling me to put that gun out of the way or he
+would put it into the fire. I sneaked to my room, put my treasure
+under the pillow, and went out for another visit to the toy shop.
+
+"There I invested six cents in 'torpedoes,' with which I intended
+to astonish my schoolmates in Bethel. I could not refrain,
+however, from experimenting upon the guests of the hotel, which I
+did when they were going in to dinner. I threw two of the
+torpedoes against the wall of the hall through which the guests
+were passing, and the immediate results were as follows: two loud
+reports--astonished guests--irate landlord--discovery of the
+culprit, and summary punishment--for the landlord immediately
+floored me with a single blow with his open hand, and said:
+
+" 'There, you little greenhorn, see if that will teach you better
+than to explode your infernal fire-crackers in my house again.'
+
+"The lesson was sufficient if not entirely satisfactory. I
+deposited the balance of the torpedoes with my gun, and as a
+solace for my wounded feelings I again visited the toy shop,
+where I bought a watch, breastpin and top, leaving but eleven
+cents of my original dollar.
+
+"The following morning found me again at the fascinating toy
+shop, where I saw a beautiful knife with two blades, a gimlet,
+and a corkscrew--a whole carpenter shop in miniature, and all for
+thirty-one cents. But, alas! I had only eleven cents. Have that
+knife I must, however, and so I proposed to the shop-woman to
+take back the top and breastpin at a slight deduction, and with
+my eleven cents to let me have the knife. The kind creature
+consented, and this makes memorable my first 'swap.' Some fine
+and nearly white molasses candy then caught my eye, and I
+proposed to trade the watch for its equivalent in candy. The
+transaction was made, and the candy was so delicious that before
+night my gun was absorbed in the same way. The next morning the
+torpedoes 'went off' in the same direction, and before night even
+my beloved knife was similarly exchanged. My money and my goods
+all gone, I traded two pocket-handkerchiefs and an extra pair of
+stockings I was sure I should not want for nine more rolls of
+molasses candy, and then wandered about the city disconsolate,
+sighing because there was no more molasses candy to conquer."
+
+During that first visit to the metropolis the boy doubtless many
+times passed the corner of Ann street and Broadway, where, in
+after years, his famous museum stood. After a week in town he
+returned to Bethel, riding with Brown in his sleigh, and found
+himself a social lion among his young friends. He was plied with
+a thousand questions about the great city which he had visited,
+and no doubt told many wondrous tales. But at home his reception
+was not altogether glorious. His brothers and sisters were
+disappointed because he brought them nothing, and his mother,
+discovering that during his journey he had lost two handkerchiefs
+and a pair of stockings, gave him a spanking and put him to bed.
+
+A settled aversion to manual labor was strongly developed in the
+boy as he grew older, which his father considered simple
+laziness. Instead of trying to cure him of his laziness, however,
+the father decided to give up the farm, and open a store, hoping
+that the boy would take more kindly to mercantile duties. So he
+put up a building in Bethel, and in partnership with one Hiram
+Weed opened a "general store," of dry goods, hardware, groceries,
+etc., and installed young Phineas as clerk. They did a "cash,
+credit and barter" business, and the boy soon learned to drive
+sharp bargains with women who brought butter, eggs, beeswax and
+feathers to exchange for dry goods, and with men who wanted to
+trade oats, corn, buckwheat, axehelves, hats and other
+commodities for ten-penny nails, molasses or New England rum. It
+was a drawback upon his dignity that he was obliged to take down
+the shutters, sweep the store and make the fire. He received a
+small salary for his services and the perquisites of what profit
+he could derive from purchasing candies on his own account to
+sell to their younger customers, and, as usual, his father
+insisted that he should clothe himself.
+
+There was much to be learned in a country store, and principally,
+as he found, this: that sharp tricks, deception and dishonesty
+are by no means confined to the city. More than once, in cutting
+open bundles of rags, brought to be exchanged for goods, he found
+stones, gravel or other rubbish wrapped up in them, although they
+were represented to be "all pure linen or cotton." Often, too,
+loads of grain were brought in, warranted to contain so many
+bushels, but on measuring them they were found five or six
+bushels short.
+
+In the evenings and on stormy days the store was a general
+meeting place for the idlers of the village, and young Barnum
+derived much amusement from the story-telling and joke-playing
+that went on among them. After the store was closed at night he
+would generally go with some of the village boys to their homes
+for an hour or two of sport, and then, as late, perhaps, as
+eleven o'clock, would creep slyly home and make his way upstairs
+barefooted, so as not to wake the rest of the family end be
+detected in his late hours. He slept with his brother, who was
+sure to report him if he woke him up on coming in, and who laid
+many traps to catch Phineas on his return from the evening's
+merry-making. But he generally fell fast asleep and our hero was
+able to gain his bed in safety.
+
+Like almost every one in Connecticut at that time he was brought
+up to go regularly to church on Sunday, and before he could read
+he was a prominent member of the Sunday-school. His pious mother
+taught him lessons in the New Testament and Catechism, and spared
+no efforts to have him win one of those "Rewards of Merit" which
+promised "to pay to the bearer One Mill." Ten of them could be
+exchanged for one cent, and by securing one hundred of them,
+which might be done by faithful attendance and attention every
+Sunday for two years, the happy scholar could secure a book worth
+ten cents!
+
+There was only one church or "meeting-house" in Bethel, and it
+was of the Presbyterian faith; but every one in town attended it,
+whatever their creed. It was a severely plain edifice, with no
+spire and no bell. In summer it was comfortable enough, but in
+winter it was awful! There was no arrangement for heating it, and
+the congregation had to sit in the cold, shivering, teeth
+chattering, noses blue. A stove would have been looked upon as a
+sacrilegious innovation. The sermons were often two hours long,
+and by the time they were ended the faithful listeners well
+deserved the nickname of "blue-skins" which the scoffers gave to
+them. A few of the wealthier women carried "foot-stoves" from
+their homes to their pews. A "foot-stove" was simply a square tin
+box in a wooden frame, with perforations in the sides. In it was
+a small square iron dish, which contained a few live coals
+covered with ashes. These stoves were usually replenished just
+before meeting time at some neighbor's near the meeting-house.
+
+After many years of shivering and suffering, one of the brethren
+had the temerity to propose that the church should be warmed with
+a stove. His impious proposition was voted down by an
+overwhelming majority. Another year came around, and in November
+the stove question was again brought up. The excitement was
+immense. The subject was discussed in the village stores and in
+the juvenile debating club; it was prayed over in conference; and
+finally in general "society's meeting," in December, the stove
+was carried by a majority of one and was introduced into the
+meeting-house. On the first Sunday thereafter two ancient maiden
+ladies were so oppressed by the dry and heated atmosphere
+occasioned by the wicked innovation that they fainted away and
+were carried out into the cool air, where they speedily returned
+to consciousness, especially when they were informed that owing
+to the lack of two lengths of pipe no fire had yet been made in
+the stove. The next Sunday was a bitter cold day, and the stove,
+filled with well-seasoned hickory, was a great gratification to
+the many, and displeased only a few.
+
+During the Rev. Mr. Lowe's ministrations at Bethel he formed a
+Bible class, of which young Barnum was a member. They used to
+draw promiscuously from a hat a text of Scripture and write a
+composition on the text, which compositions were read after
+service in the afternoon to such of the congregation as remained
+to hear the exercises of the class. Once Barnum drew the text,
+Luke x. 42: "But one thing is needful; and Mary hath chosen that
+good part which shall not be taken away from her." Question,
+"What is the one thing needful?" His answer was nearly as
+follows:
+
+"This question, 'What is the one thing needful?' is capable of
+receiving various answers, depending much upon the persons to
+whom it is addressed. The merchant might answer that 'the one
+thing needful' is plenty of customers, who buy liberally, without
+beating down, and pay cash for all their purchases.' The farmer
+might reply that 'the one thing needful is large harvests and
+high prices.' The physician might answer that 'it is plenty of
+patients.' The lawyer might be of opinion that 'it is an unruly
+community, always engaging in bickerings and litigations.' The
+clergyman might reply, 'It is a fat salary, with multitudes of
+sinners seeking salvation and paying large pew rents.' The
+bachelor might exclaim, 'It is a pretty wife who loves her
+husband, and who knows how to sew on buttons.' The maiden might
+answer, 'It is a good husband, who will love, cherish and protect
+me while life shall last.' But the most proper answer, and
+doubtless that which applied to the case of Mary, would be, 'The
+one thing needful is to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, follow
+in his footsteps, love God and obey His commandments, love our
+fellowman, and embrace every opportunity of administering to his
+necessities.' In short, 'the one thing needful' is to live a life
+that we can always look back upon with satisfaction, and be
+enabled ever to contemplate its termination with trust in Him who
+has so kindly vouchsafed it to us, surrounding us with
+innumerable blessings, if we have but the heart and wisdom to
+receive them in a proper manner."
+
+The reading of a portion of this answer occasioned some amusement
+in the congregation, in which the clergyman himself joined, and
+the name of "Taylor Barnum" was whispered in connection with the
+composition; but at the close of the reading Barnum had the
+satisfaction of hearing Mr. Lowe say that it was a well-written
+answer to the question, "What is the one thing needful?"
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II. EARLY YEARS AT BETHEL.
+
+DEATH OF HIS GRANDMOTHER AND FATHER--LEFT PENNILESS AND
+BAREFOOTED--WORK IN A STORE--HIS FIRST LOVE--TRYING TO BUY
+RUSSIA--UNCLE BIBBIN'S DUEL.
+
+In August, 1825, the aged grandmother met with an accident in
+stepping on the point of a rusty nail, which shortly afterwards
+resulted in her death. She was a woman of great piety, and before
+she died sent for each of her grandchildren--to whom she was
+devoted--and besought them to lead a Christian life. Barnum was
+so deeply impressed by that death-bed scene that through his
+whole life neither the recollection of it, nor of the dying
+woman's words, ever left him.
+
+The elder Barnum was a man of many enterprises and few successes.
+Besides being the proprietor of a hotel he owned a livery-stable,
+ran a sort of an express, and kept a country store. Phineas was
+his confidential clerk, and, if he did not reap much financial
+benefit from his position, he at least obtained a good business
+education.
+
+On the 7th of September, 1825, the father, after a six months'
+illness, died at the age of forty-eight, leaving a wife and five
+children and an insolvent estate. There was literally nothing
+left for the family; the creditors seized everything; even the
+small sum which Phineas had loaned his father was held to be the
+property of a minor, and therefore belonging to the estate. The
+boy was obliged to borrow money to buy the shoes he wore to the
+funeral. At fifteen he began the world not only penniless but
+barefooted.
+
+He went at once to Grassy Plain, a few miles northwest of Bethel,
+where he managed to obtain a clerkship in the store of James S.
+Keeler and Lewis Whitlock, at the magnificent salary of six
+dollars a month and his board. He had chosen his uncle, Alanson
+Taylor, as his guardian, but made his home with Mrs. Jerusha
+Wheeler and her two daughters; Mary and Jerusha. He worked hard
+and faithfully, and so gained the esteem of his employers that
+they afforded him many opportunities for making money on his own
+account. His small speculations proved so successful that before
+long he found himself in possession of quite a little sum.
+
+"I made," says Barnum, "a very remarkable trade at one time for
+my employers by purchasing, in their absence, a whole wagon-load
+of green glass bottles of various sizes, for which I paid in
+unsalable goods at very profitable prices. How to dispose of the
+bottles was then the problem, and as it was also desirable to get
+rid of a large quantity of tin-ware which had been in the shop
+for years and was con-siderably 'shop worn,' I conceived the idea
+of a lottery, in which the highest prize should be twenty-five
+dollars, payable in any goods the winner desired, while there
+were to be fifty prizes of five dollars each, payable in goods,
+to be designated in the scheme. Then there were one hundred
+prizes of one dollar each, one hundred prizes of fifty cents
+each, and three hundred prizes of twenty-five cents each. It is
+unnecessary to state that the minor prizes consisted mainly of
+glass and tin-ware; the tickets sold like wildfire, and the worn
+tin and glass bottles were speedily turned into cash."
+
+Mrs Barnum still continued to keep the village hotel at Bethel,
+and Phineas went home every Saturday night, going to church with
+his mother on Sunday, and returning to his work Monday morning.
+One Saturday evening Miss Mary Wheeler, at whose house the young
+man boarded, sent him word that she had a young lady from Bethel
+whom she desired him to escort home, as it was raining violently,
+and the maiden was afraid to go alone. He assented readily
+enough, and went over to "Aunt Rushia's," where he was introduced
+to Miss Charity ("Chairy," for short) Hallett. She was a very
+pretty girl and a bright talker, and the way home seemed only too
+short to her escort. She was a tailoress in the village, and went
+to church regularly, but, although Phineas saw her every Sunday
+for many weeks, he had no opportunity of the acquaintance that
+season.
+
+Mrs. Jerusha Wheeler and her daughter Jerusha were familiarly
+known, the one as "Aunt Rushia," and the other as "Rushia." Many
+of the store customers were hatters, and among the many kinds of
+furs sold for the nap of hats was one known to the trade as
+"Russia." One day a hatter, Walter Dibble, called to buy some
+furs. Barnum sold him several kinds, including "beaver" and
+"cony," and he then asked for some "Russia." They had none, and
+as Barnum wanted to play a joke upon him, he told him that Mrs.
+Wheeler had several hundred pounds of "Rushia."
+
+"What on earth is a woman doing with 'Russia?' " said he.
+
+Barnum could not answer, but assured him that there were one
+hundred and thirty pounds of old Rushia and one hundred and fifty
+pounds of young Rushia in Mrs. Wheeler's house, and under her
+charge, but whether or not it was for sale he could not say. Off
+he started to make the purchase and knocked at the door. Mrs.
+Wheeler, the elder, made her appearance.
+
+"I want to get your Russia," said the hatter.
+
+Mrs. Wheeler asked him to walk in and be seated. She, of course,
+supposed that he had come for her daughter "Rushia."
+
+"What do you want of Rushia?" asked the old lady.
+
+"To make hats," was the reply.
+
+"To trim hats, I suppose you mean?" responded Mrs. Wheeler.
+
+"No, for the outside of hats," replied the hatter.
+
+"Well, I don't know much about hats," said the old lady, "but I
+will call my daughter."
+
+Passing into another room where "Rushia" the younger was at work,
+she informed her that a man wanted her to make hats.
+
+"Oh, he means sister Mary, probably. I suppose he wants some
+ladies' hats," replied Rushia, as she went into the parlor.
+
+"This is my daughter," said the old lady.
+
+"I want to get your Russia," said he, addressing the young lady.
+
+"I suppose you wish to see my sister Mary; she is our milliner,"
+said young Rushia.
+
+"I wish to see whoever owns the property," said the hatter.
+
+Sister Mary was sent for, and, as she was introduced, the hatter
+informed her that he wished to buy her "Russia."
+
+"Buy Rushia!" exclaimed Mary, in surprise; I don't understand
+you."
+
+"Your name is Miss Wheeler, I believe," said the hatter, who was
+annoyed by the difficulty he met with in being understood.
+
+"It is, sir."
+
+"Ah! very well. Is there old and young Russia in the house?"
+
+"I believe there is," said Mary, surprised at the familiar manner
+in which he spoke of her mother and sister, who were present.
+
+"What is the price of old Russia per pound?" asked the hatter.
+
+"I believe, sir, that old Rushia is not for sale," replied Mary,
+indignantly.
+
+"Well, what do you ask for young Russia?" pursued the hatter.
+
+"Sir," said Miss Rushia the younger, springing to her feet, "do
+you come here to insult defenceless females? If you do, sir, our
+brother, who is in the garden, will punish you as you deserve."
+
+"Ladies!" exclaimed the hatter, in astonishment, "what on earth
+have I done to offend you? I came here on a business matter. I
+want to buy some Russia. I was told you had old and young Russia
+in the house. Indeed, this young lady just stated such to be the
+fact, but she says the old Russia is not for sale. Now, if I can
+buy the young Russia I want to do so--but if that can't be done,
+please to say so, and I will trouble you no further."
+
+"Mother, open the door and let this man go out; he is undoubtedly
+crazy," said Miss Mary.
+
+"By thunder! I believe I shall be if I remain here long,"
+exclaimed the hatter, considerably excited. "I wonder if folks
+never do business in these parts, that you think a man is crazy
+if he attempts such a thing?"
+
+"Business! poor man!" said Mary soothingly, approaching the door.
+
+"I am not a poor man, madam," replied the hatter. "My name is
+Walter Dibble; I carry on hatting extensively in Danbury; I came
+to Grassy Plain to buy fur, and have purchased some 'beaver' and
+'cony,' and now it seems I am to be called 'crazy' and a 'poor
+man,' because I want to buy a little 'Russia' to make up my
+assortment."
+
+The ladies began to open their eyes; they saw that Mr. Dibble was
+quite in earnest, and his explanation threw considerable light
+upon the subject.
+
+"Who sent you here?" asked sister Mary.
+
+"The clerk at the opposite store," was the reply.
+
+"He is a wicked young fellow for making all this trouble," said
+the old lady; "he has been doing this for a joke."
+
+"A joke!" exclaimed Dibble, in surprise, "have you no Russia,
+then?"
+
+"My name is Jerusha, and so is my daughter's," said Mrs. Wheeler,
+"and that, I suppose, is what he meant by telling you of old and
+young Rushia."
+
+Mr. Dibble, without more words, left the house and made for the
+store. "You young villain!" he cried, as he entered, "what did
+you mean by sending me over there to buy Russia?"
+
+"I didn't," answered the young villain, with a perfectly solemn
+face, "I thought you were a widower or a bachelor who wanted to
+marry Rushia."
+
+"You lie," said the discomfited Dibble, laughing in spite of
+himself; "but never mind, I'll pay you off some day." And
+gathering up his furs he departed.
+
+On another occasion this sense of humor and love of joking was
+turned to very practical account. Among the customers at the
+store were a half a dozen old Revolutionary pensioners, who were
+permitted to buy on credit, leaving their pension papers as
+security. One of these pensioners was a romancing old fellow
+named Bevans--more commonly known as "Uncle Bibbins." He was very
+fond of his glass, and fonder still of relating anecdotes of the
+Revolution, in which his own prowess and daring were always the
+conspicuous features. His pension papers were in the possession
+of Keeler & Whitlock, but it was three months before the money
+was due, and they grew very weary of having him for a customer.
+They tried delicately suggesting a visit to his relatives in
+Guilford, but Uncle Bibbins steadily refused to take the hint.
+Finally young Barnum enlisted the services of a journeyman hatter
+named Benton, and together they hit on a plan. The hatter was
+inspired to call Uncle Bibbins a coward, and to declare his
+belief that if the old gentleman was wounded anywhere it must
+have been in the back. Barnum pretended to sympathize with the
+veteran's just indignation, and finally fired him up to the pitch
+of challenging the hatter to mortal combat. The challenge was
+promptly accepted, and the weapons chosen were muskets and ball,
+at a distance of twenty feet. Uncle Bibbins took his second
+(Barnum, of course) aside, and begged him to see that the guns
+were loaded only with blank cartridges. He was assured that it
+would be so, and that no one would be injured in the encounter.
+
+The ground was measured back of the store, the principals and
+seconds took their places, and the word of command was given.
+They fired, Uncle Bibbins, of course, being unhurt, but the
+hatter, with a fearful yell, fell to the ground as if dead.
+Barnum rushed up to the frightened Bevans and begged him to fly,
+promising to let him know when it was safe for him to return. The
+old fellow started out of town on a run, and for the next three
+months remained very quietly at Guilford. At the end of that time
+his faithful second sent for him, with the assurance that his
+late adversary had not only recovered from his wound but had
+freely forgiven all. Uncle Bibbins then returned and paid up his
+debts. Meeting Benton on the street some days later, the two foes
+shook hands, Benton apologizing for his insult. Uncle Bibbins
+accepted the apology, "but," he added, "you must be careful after
+this how you insult a dead-shot."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III. BUSINESS LIFE.
+
+REMOVAL TO BROOKLYN--SMALLPOX--GOES HOME TO RECOVER HIS
+HEALTH--RENEWED ACQUAINTANCE WITH THE PRETTY TAILORESS, FIRST
+INDEPENDENT BUSINESS VENTURE--RESIDENCE IN NEW YORK --RETURN TO
+BETHEL--ANECDOTES.
+
+In the fall of 1826, Oliver Taylor, who had removed from Danbury
+to Brooklyn, induced Barnum to leave Grassy Plain, offering him a
+clerkship in his grocery store, which offer was accepted, and
+before long the young man was intrusted with the purchasing of
+all goods for the store. He bought for cash, going into lower New
+York in search of the cheapest market, frequenting auction sales
+of merchandise, and often entering into combines with other
+grocers to bid off large lots, which were afterward divided
+between them. Thus they were enabled to buy at a much lower rate
+than if the goods had passed through the hands of wholesale
+dealers, and Barnum's reputation for business tact and shrewdness
+increased.
+
+The following summer he was taken ill with smallpox, and during
+his long confinement to the house his stock of ready money became
+sadly di-minished. As soon as he was able to travel he went home
+to recover his strength, and while there had the happiness of
+renewing the acquaintance, so pleasantly begun, with the pretty
+tailoress, Charity Hallett.
+
+His health fully restored he returned to Brooklyn, but not to his
+old position. Pleasant as that had been, it no longer contented
+the restless, ambitious Barnum. He opened a "porter-home," but
+sold out a few months later, at a good profit, and took another
+clerkship, this time at 29 Peck Slip, New York, in the store of a
+certain David Thorp. He lived in his employer's family, with
+which he was a great favorite, and where he had frequent
+opportunities of meeting old friends, for Mr. Thorp's place was a
+great resort for Bethel and Danbury hatters and combmakers.
+
+At this time Barnum formed his first taste for the theatre. He
+went to the play regularly and soon set up for a critic. It was
+his one dissipation, however. A more moral young fellow never
+existed; he read his Bible and went to church as regularly as
+ever, and to the day of his death was wont to declare that he
+owed all that was good in his character to his early observance
+of Sunday.
+
+In the winter of 1898 his grandfather offered to him, rent free,
+his carriage-house, which was situated on the main street, if he
+would come back to Bethel. The young man's capital was one
+hundred and twenty dollars; fifty of this was spent in fixing up
+his store, and the remainder he invested in a stock of fruit and
+confectionery. Having arranged with fruit dealers of his
+acquaintance in New York to receive his orders, he opened his
+store on the first of May--in those times known as "training
+day." The first day was so successful that long before noon the
+proprietor was obliged to call in one of his old schoolmates to
+assist in waiting on customers. The total receipts were
+sixty-three dollars, which sum was promptly invested in a stock
+of fancy goods --pocket-books, combs, knives, rings, beads, etc.
+Business was good all summer, and in the fall oysters were added
+to the list of attractions. The old grandfather was delighted at
+the success of the scheme, and after a while induced Barnum to
+take an agency for lottery tickets on a commission of ten per
+cent. Lotteries in those days were looked upon as thoroughly
+respectable, and the profit gained from the sale of the tickets
+was regarded as perfectly legitimate by the agent; his views on
+the subject changed very materially later on.
+
+The store soon became the great village resort, the centre of all
+discussions and the scene of many practical jokes.
+
+The following scene, related by Barnum himself, makes a chapter
+in the history of Connecticut, as the State was when "blue laws"
+were something more than a dead letter:
+
+"To swear in those days was according to custom, but contrary to
+law. A person from New York State, whom I will call Crofut, who
+was a frequent visitor at my store, was equally noted for his
+self-will and his really terrible profanity. One day he was in my
+little establishment engaged in conversation when Nathan Seelye,
+Esq., one of our village justices of the peace, and a man of
+strict religious principles, came in, and hearing Crofut's
+profane language he told him he considered it his duty to fine
+him one dollar for swearing.
+
+"Crofut responded immediately with an oath, that he did not care
+a d----n for the Connecticut blue laws.
+
+" 'That will make two dollars,' said Mr. Seelye.
+
+"This brought forth another oath.
+
+" 'Three dollars,' said the sturdy justice.
+
+"Nothing but oaths were given in reply, until Esquire Seelye
+declared the damage to the Connecticut laws to amount to fifteen
+dollars.
+
+"Crofut took out a twenty-dollar bill and handed it to the
+justice of the peace, with an oath.
+
+" 'Sixteen dollars,' said Mr. Seelye, counting out four dollars
+to hand to Mr. Crofut as his change.
+
+" 'Oh, keep it, keep it,' said Crofut, 'I don't want any change;
+I'll d----n soon swear out the balance.' He did so, after which
+he was more circumspect in his conversation, remarking that
+twenty dollars a day for swearing was about as much as he could
+stand."
+
+About this time Barnum appeared, on at least one occasion, in the
+role of lawyer. A man charged with assault and battery was
+brought before the justice of the peace, Barnum's grandfather,
+for trial. A medical student, Newton by name, had volunteered to
+defend the prisoner, and Mr. Couch, the grand juryman, in irony,
+offered Phineas a dollar to represent the State. The court was
+crowded. The guilt of the prisoner was established beyond a
+doubt, but Newton, undaunted, rose to make his speech. It
+consisted of a flood of invective against the grand juryman,
+Couch; the court listened for five minutes, and then interrupted
+a magnificent burst of eloquence by informing the speaker that
+Mr. Couch was not the plaintiff in the case at all.
+
+"Not the plaintiff!" stammered Newton; "well, then, your honor,
+who is?"
+
+"The State of Connecticut," was the answer.
+
+The young man dropped into his seat, speechless, and the
+prosecuting attorney arose and in an elaborate speech declared
+the guilt of the prisoner shown beyond question, adding that he
+was astonished that both the prisoner and his counsel had not
+pleaded guilty at once. In the midst of his soarings the
+grandfather interrupted with--"Young man, will you have the
+kindness to inform the court which side you represent--the
+plaintiff or the defendant?"
+
+The orator stared helplessly at the justice for a moment, and
+then sat down. Amid peals of laughter from the spectators the
+prisoner was bound over to the county court for trial.
+
+But Phineas did not often come out so ingloriously in encounters
+with his grandfather. The old gentleman was always ready to lend
+his grandson any of his turnouts except one, and this one Phineas
+especially desired one day for a sleighing party, in which he was
+to escort the fair Charity Hallett. So he boldly went to the
+grandfather and asked if he might take Arabian and the new
+sleigh.
+
+"Oh, yes," said the old man, jokingly, "if you have twenty
+dollars in your pocket."
+
+"Really?"
+
+"Yes, really."
+
+Whereupon Phineas showed the money, and putting it back in his
+pocket, remarked, "You see; I am much obliged for the sleigh."
+
+Of course, the grandfather had meant to ask an impossible price
+for the horse and sleigh; but being caught up so suddenly, there
+was nothing to do but to consent, and Phineas and "Chairy" had
+the finest turnout of the party.
+
+There was a young fellow in the town, Jack Mallett, whose
+education was rather deficient, and who had been somewhat
+unsuccessfully paying his addresses to a fair but hard-hearted
+maiden, named Lucretia. One Sunday evening she cruelly refused to
+accept his escort after church, and added insult to injury by
+walking off before his very eyes with another man. Accordingly,
+he determined to write her a letter of remonstrance, and enlisted
+the aid of Phineas and another young blade known as "Bill"
+Shepherd. The joint effort of the three resulted in the
+following:
+
+                              "BETHEL,----, 18--.
+
+"MISS LUCRETIA: I write this to ask an explanation of your
+conduct in giving me the mitten on Sunday night last. If you
+think, madam, that you can trifle with my affections, and turn me
+off for every little whipper-snapper that you can pick up, you
+will find yourself considerably mistaken. [We read thus far to
+Mallett, and it met his approval. He said he liked the idea of
+calling her "madam," for he thought it sounded so "distant," it
+would hurt her feelings very much. The term "little
+whipper-snapper" also delighted him. He said he guessed that
+would make her feel cheap. Shepherd and myself were not quite so
+sure of its aptitude, since the chap who succeeded in capturing
+Lucretia, on the occasion alluded to, was a head and shoulders
+taller than Mallett. However, we did not intimate our thoughts to
+Mallett, and he desired us to "go ahead and give her another
+dose."] You don't know me, madam, if you think you can snap me up
+in this way. I wish you to understand that I can have the company
+of girls as much above you as the sun is above the earth, and I
+won't stand any of your impudent nonsense no how. [This was duly
+read and approved. "Now," said Mallett, "try to touch her
+feelings. Remind her of the pleasant hours we have spent
+together;" and we continued as follows:] My dear Lucretia, when I
+think of the many pleasant hours we have spent together--of the
+delightful walks which we have had on moonlight evenings to
+Fenner's Rocks, Chestnut Ridge, Grassy Plain, Wild Cat and Puppy
+Town--of the strolls which we have taken upon Shelter Rocks,
+Cedar Hill--the visits we have made to Old Lane, Wolfpits, Toad
+Hole and Plum Trees[1]--when all these things come rushing on my
+mind, and when; my dear girl, I remember how often you have told
+me that you loved me better than anybody else, and I assured you
+that my feelings were the same as yours, it almost breaks my
+heart to think of last Sunday night. ["Can't you stick in some
+affecting poetry here?" said Mallett. Shepherd could not
+recollect any to the point, nor could I; but as the exigency of
+the case seemed to require it, we concluded to manufacture a
+verse or two, which we did, as follows:]
+
+[1] These were the euphonious names of localities in the vicinity
+of Bethel.
+
+
+ Lucretia, dear, what have I done,
+That you should use me thus and so,
+To take the arm of Tom Beers' son,
+And let your dearest true love go?
+
+ Miserable fate, to lose you now,
+And tear this bleeding heart asunder!
+Will you forget your tender vow?
+I can't believe it--no, by thunder.
+
+[Mallett did not like the word "thunder," but being informed that
+no other word could be substituted without destroying both rhyme
+and reason, he consented that it should remain, provided we added
+two more stanzas of a softer nature; something, he said, that
+would make the tears come, if possible, We then ground out the
+following:]
+
+ Lucretia, dear, do write to Jack,
+And say with Beers you are not smitten;
+And thus to me in love come back,
+And give all other boys the mitten.
+
+ Do this, Lucretia, and till death
+I'll love you to intense distraction;
+I'll spend for you my every breath,
+And we will live in satisfaction.
+
+["That will do very well," said Mallett. "Now I guess you had
+better blow her up a little more." We obeyed orders as follows:]
+It makes me mad to think what a fool I was to give you that
+finger-ring and bosom-pin, and spend so much time in your
+company, just to be flirted and bamboozled as I was on Sunday
+night last. If you continue this course of conduct, we part
+forever, and I will thank you to send back that jewelry. I would
+sooner see it crushed under my feet than worn by a person who
+abused me as you have done. I shall despise you forever if you
+don't change your conduct towards me, and send me a letter of
+apology on Monday next. I shall not go to meeting to-morrow, for
+I would scorn to sit in the same meeting-house with you until I
+have an explanation of your conduct. If you allow any young man
+to go home with you to-morrow night, I shall know it, for you
+will be watched, ["There," said Mallett, "that is pretty strong.
+Now, I guess, you had better touch her feelings once more, and
+wind up the letter." We proceeded as follows:] My sweet girl, if
+you only knew the sleepless nights which I have spent during the
+present week, the torments and sufferings which I endure on your
+account; if you could but realize that I regard the world as less
+than nothing without you, I am certain you would pity me. A
+homely cot and a crust of bread with my adorable Lucretia would
+be a paradise, where a palace without you would be a hades.
+["What in thunder is hades?" inquired Jack. We explained. He
+considered the figure rather bold, and requested us to close as
+soon as possible.] Now, dearest, in bidding you adieu, I implore
+you to reflect on our past enjoyments, look forward with pleasure
+to our future happy meetings, and rely upon your affectionate
+Jack in storm or calm, in sickness, distress or want, for all
+these will be powerless to change my love. I hope to hear from
+you on Monday next, and, if favorable, I shall be happy to call
+on you the same evening, when in ecstatic joy we will laugh at
+the past, hope for the future, and draw consolation from the fact
+that "the course of true love never did run smooth." This from
+your disconsolate but still hoping lover and admirer,
+         "JACK MALLETT.
+
+"P. S.--On reflection I have concluded to go to meeting
+to-morrow. If all is well, hold your pocket-handkerchief in your
+left hand as you stand up to sing with the choir--in which case I
+shall expect the pleasure of giving you my arm to-morrow night.
+                                     "J. M."
+
+The effect of this letter upon Lucretia was not as favorable as
+could have been desired. She declined to remove her handkerchief
+from her right hand, and she returned the "ring and bosom-pin" to
+her disconsolate admirer, while, not many months after, Mallett's
+rival led Lucretia to the altar. As for Mallett's agreement to
+pay Shepherd and Barnum five pounds of carpet-rags and twelve
+yards of broadcloth "lists" for their services, owing to his ill
+success, they compromised for one-half the amount.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV. TRYING MANY VENTURES.
+
+VISIT TO PITTSBURG--SUCCESSFUL LOTTERY BUSINESS--MARRIAGE--FIRST
+EDITORIAL VENTURE--LIBEL SUIT, IMPRISONMENT AND
+LIBERATION--REMOVAL TO NEW YORK--HARD TIMES--KEEPING A
+BOARDING-HOUSE.
+
+About this time Barnum, with a Mr. Samuel Sherwood, of
+Bridgeport, started for Pittsburg, where they proposed to open a
+lottery office. On reaching New York, however, and talking over
+the scheme with friends, the venture was abandoned and the two
+men took, instead, a pleasure trip to Philadelphia. They stayed a
+week, at the end of which time they returned to New York, with
+exactly twenty-seven cents between them. Sherwood managed to
+borrow two dollars--enough to take him to Newark, where he had a
+cousin, who obligingly loaned him fifty dollars. The two friends
+remained in New York on the strength of their newly acquired
+wealth for several days, and then went home considerably richer
+in experience at least.
+
+Barnum now went into the lottery business exclusively, taking his
+uncle, Alanson Taylor, into partnership. They established a
+number of agencies throughout the country, and made good profits
+from the sale of tickets. Several of the tickets sold by them
+took prizes and their office came to be considered "lucky."
+
+The young man was prospering also in another direction. The fair
+tailoress smiled on him as sweetly as ever, and in the summer of
+1827 they became formally engaged. In the fall Miss Hallett went
+"on a visit" to her uncle, Nathan Beers, in New York. A month
+later her lover followed, "to buy goods," and on the 8th of
+November, 1829, there was a wedding in the comfortable house at
+No. 3 Allen street. Having married at the age of nineteen, Barnum
+always expressed his disapproval of early marriages, although his
+own was a very happy one.
+
+Returning to Bethel, Mr. and Mrs. Barnum, after boarding for a
+few months, moved into their own house, which was built on a
+three acre plat purchased from the grandfather.
+
+The lottery business still prospered, but it was mostly in the
+hands of agents, in Danbury, Norwalk, Stamford and Middletown,
+and Barnum began to look around for some field for his individual
+energies. He tried travelling as a book auctioneer, but found it
+uncongenial and quit the business. In July, 1831, with his uncle
+Alanson Taylor, he opened a grocery and general store, but the
+venture was not particularly successful, and in the fall the
+partnership was dissolved, Barnum buying his uncle's interest.
+
+The next enterprise was an important one, it being the real
+beginning of Phineas T. Barnum's public career.
+
+In a period of strong political excitement, he wrote several
+communications for the Danbury weekly paper, setting forth what
+he conceived to be the dangers of a sectarian interference which
+was then apparent in political affairs. The publication of these
+communications was refused, and he accordingly purchased a press
+and types, and October 19, 1831, issued the first number of his
+own paper, The Herald of Freedom.
+
+"I entered upon the editorship of this journal," says Mr. Barnum,
+"with all the vigor and vehemence of youth. The boldness with
+which the paper was conducted soon excited widespread attention
+and commanded a circulation which extended beyond the immediate
+locality into nearly every State in the Union. But lacking that
+experience which induces caution, and without the dread of
+consequences, I frequently laid myself open to the charge of
+libel, and three times in three years I was prosecuted. A Danbury
+butcher, a zealous politician, brought a civil suit against me
+for accusing him of being a spy in a Democratic caucus. On the
+first trial the jury did not agree, but after a second trial I
+was fined several hundred dollars. Another libel suit against me
+was withdrawn. The third was sufficiently important to warrant
+the following detail:
+
+"A criminal prosecution was brought against me for stating in my
+paper that a man in Bethel, prominent in church, had 'been guilty
+of taking USURY of an orphan boy,' and for severely commenting on
+the fact in my editorial columns. When the case came to trial the
+truth of my statement was substantially proved by several
+witnesses and even by the prosecuting party. But 'the greater the
+truth, the greater the libel,' and then I had used the term
+'usury,' instead of extortion, or note-shaving, or some other
+expression which might have softened the verdict. The result was
+that I was sentenced to pay a fine of one hundred dollars and to
+be imprisoned in the common jail for sixty days.
+
+"The most comfortable provision was made for me in Danbury jail.
+My room was papered and carpeted; I lived well; I was overwhelmed
+with the constant visits of my friends; I edited my paper as
+usual and received large accessions to my subscription list; and
+at the end of my sixty days' term the event was celebrated by a
+large concourse of people from the surrounding country. The court
+room in which I was convicted was the scene of the celebration.
+An ode, written for the occasion, was sung; an eloquent oration
+on the freedom of the press was delivered; and several hundred
+gentlemen afterwards partook of a sumptuous dinner followed by
+appropriate toasts and speeches. Then came the triumphant part of
+the ceremonial, which was reported in my paper of December 12,
+1832, as follows:
+
+" 'P. T. Barnum and the band of music took their seats in a coach
+drawn by six horses, which had been prepared for the occasion.
+The coach was preceded by forty horsemen, and a marshal, bearing
+the national standard. Immediately in the rear of the coach was
+the carriage of the orator and the President of the day, followed
+by the committee of arrangements and sixty carriages of citizens,
+which joined in escorting the editor to his home in Bethel.
+
+" 'When the procession commenced its march amidst the roar of
+cannon, three cheers were given by several hundred citizens who
+did not join in the procession. The band of music continued to
+play a variety of national airs until their arrival in Bethel (a
+distance of three miles), when they struck up the beautiful and
+appropriate tune of "Home, Sweet Home!" After giving three hearty
+cheers, the procession returned to Danbury. The utmost harmony
+and unanimity of feeling prevailed throughout the day, and we are
+happy to add that no accident occured to mar the festivities of
+the occasion.' "
+
+The editorial career continued as it had begun. In 1830 The
+Herald of Freedom was sold to Mr. George Taylor.
+
+The mercantile business was also sold to Horace Fairchild, who
+had been associated with it as partner since 1831, and a Mr.
+Toucey, who formed a partnership under the name of Fairchild &
+Co. Barnum had lost considerable money in this store; he was too
+speculative for ordinary trade, too ready, also to give credit,
+and his ledger was full of unpaid accounts when he finally gave
+up business.
+
+In 1835 he removed his family to New York, taking a house in
+Hudson street. For a time he tried to get a position in a
+mercantile house, not on a fixed salary, but so as to derive a
+commission on his sales, trusting to his ability to make more
+money in this way than an ordinary clerk could be expected to
+receive. Failing in this he acted as a "drummer" for several
+stores until spring, when he was fortunate enough to receive
+several hundred dollars from his agent at Bethel. In May he
+opened a private boarding-house at 52 Frankfort street, which was
+well patronized by his Connecticut acquaintances as often as they
+visited the metropolis. This business not occupying his entire
+time, he bought an interest in a grocery store at 156 South
+street.
+
+Although the years of manhood brought cares, anxieties, and
+struggles for a livelihood, they did not change Barnum's nature,
+and the jocose element was still an essential ingredient of his
+being. He loved fun, practical fun, for itself and for the
+enjoyment which it brought. During the year he occasionally
+visited Bridgeport, where he almost always found at the hotel a
+noted joker, named Darrow, who spared neither friend nor foe in
+his tricks. He was the life of the bar-room, and would always try
+to entrap some stranger in a bet and so win a treat for the
+company. He made several ineffectual attempts upon Barnum, and at
+last, one evening, Darrow, who stuttered, made a final trial, as
+follows:
+
+"Come, Barnum, I'll make you another proposition; I'll bet you
+hadn't got a whole shirt on your back." The catch consists in the
+fact that generally only one-half of that convenient garment is
+on the back; but Barnum had anticipated the proposition --in fact
+he had induced a friend, Mr. Hough, to put Darrow up to the
+trick--and had folded a shirt nicely upon his back, securing it
+there with his suspenders. The bar-room was crowded with
+customers who thought that if Barnum made the bet he would be
+nicely caught, and he made presence of playing off and at the
+same time stimulated Darrow to press the bet by saying:
+
+"That is a foolish bet to make; I am sure my shirt is whole
+because it is nearly new; but I don't like to bet on such a
+subject."
+
+"A good reason why," said Darrow, in great glee; "it's ragged.
+Come, I'll bet you a treat for the whole company you hadn't got a
+whole shirt on your b-b-b-back!"
+
+"I'll bet my shirt is cleaner than yours," Barnum replied.
+
+"That's nothing to do w-w-with the case; it's ragged, and y-y-you
+know it."
+
+"I know it is not," Barnum replied, with pretended anger, which
+caused the crowd to laugh heartily.
+
+"You poor ragged f-f-fellow, come down here from D-D-Danbury, I'm
+sorry for you," said Darrow tantalizingly.
+
+"You would not pay if you lost," Barnum remarked.
+
+"Here's f-f-five dollars I'll put in Captain Hinman's (the
+landlord's) hands. Now b-b-bet if you dare, you ragged
+c-c-creature, you."
+
+Barnum put five dollars in Captain Hinman's hands, and told him
+to treat the company from it if he lost the bet.
+
+"Remember," said Darrow, "I b-b-bet you hadn't got a whole shirt
+on your bob-back!"
+
+"All right," said Barnum, taking off his coat and commencing to
+unbutton his vest. The whole company, feeling sure that he was
+caught, began to laugh heartily. Old Darrow fairly danced with
+delight, and as Barnum laid his coat on a chair he came running
+up in front of him, and slapping his hands together, exclaimed:
+
+"You needn't t-t-take off any more c-c-clothes, for if it ain't
+all on your b-b-back, you've lost it."
+
+"If it is, I suppose you have!" Barnum replied, pulling the whole
+shirt from off his back!
+
+Such a shriek of laughter as burst forth from the crowd was
+scarcely ever heard, and certainly such a blank countenance as
+old Darrow exhibited it would be hard to conceive. Seeing that he
+was most incontinently "done for," and perceiving that his
+neighbor Hough had helped to do it, he ran up to him in great
+anger, and shaking his fist in his face, exclaimed:
+
+"H-H-Hough, you infernal r-r-rascal, to go against your own
+neighbor in favor of a D-D-Danbury man. I'll pay you for that
+some time, you see if I d-d-don't."
+
+All hands went up to the bar and drank with a hearty good will,
+for it was seldom that Darrow got taken in, and he was such an
+inveterate joker they liked to see him paid in his own coin.
+Never till the day of his death did he hear the last of the
+"whole shirt."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V. BEGINNING AS A SHOWMAN.
+
+FINDING HIS TRUE VOCATION--THE PURCHASE OF JOICE HETH--EVIDENCE
+AS TO HER AGE--HER DEATH--SIGNOR VIVALLA--A VISIT TO
+WASHINGTON--JOINING A TRAVELLING CIRCUS--CONTROVERSIES WITH
+MINISTERS--THE VICTIM OF A PRACTICAL JOKE.
+
+Barnum was now satisfied that he had not yet found his proper
+level. He had not yet entered the business for which nature had
+designed him. There was only a prospect of his going on from this
+to that, as his father had done before him, trying many callings
+but succeeding in none. He had not yet discovered that love of
+amusement is one of the strongest passions of the human heart.
+This, however, was a lesson that he was soon to learn; and he was
+to achieve both fame and fortune as a caterer to the public
+desire for entertainment.
+
+Philosophizing on this theme in later years, Mr. Barnum once
+said: "The show business has all phases and grades of dignity,
+from the exhibition of a monkey to the exposition of that highest
+art in music or the drama which entrances empires and secures for
+the gifted artist a worldwide fame which princes well might envy.
+Men, women and children, who cannot live on gravity alone, need
+something to satisfy their gayer, lighter moods and hours, and he
+who ministers to this want is in a business established by the
+Author of our nature. If he worthily fulfils his mission, and
+amuses without corrupting, he need never feel that he has lived
+in vain."
+
+In the summer of 1835, Mr. Barnum was visited by Mr. Coley
+Bartram, of Reading, Connecticut, who told him that he had owned
+an interest in a remarkable negro woman, who was confidently
+believed to be one hundred and sixty-one years old and to have
+been the nurse of Washington. Mr. Bartram showed him a copy of an
+advertisement in The Pennsylvania Inquirer for July 15, 1835, as
+follows:
+
+"CURIOSITY.--The citizens of Philadelphia and its vicinity have
+an opportunity of witnessing at the Masonic Hall one of the
+greatest natural curiosities ever witnessed, viz.: JOICE HETH, a
+negress, aged 161 years, who formerly belonged to the father of
+General Washington. She has been a member of the Baptist Church
+one hundred and sixteen years, and can rehearse many hymns, and
+sing them according to former custom. She was born near the old
+Potomac River in Virginia, and has for ninety or one hundred
+years lived in Paris, Kentucky, with the Bowling family.
+
+"All who have seen this extraordinary woman are satisfied of the
+truth of the account of her age. The evidence of the Bowling
+family, which is respectable, is strong, but the original bill of
+sale of Augustine Washington, in his own handwriting, and other
+evidences which the proprietor has in his possession, will
+satisfy even the most incredulous.
+
+"A lady will attend at the hall during the afternoon and evening
+for the accommodation of those ladies who may call."
+
+Mr. Bartram told him, moreover, that he had sold out his interest
+in the woman to R. W. Lindsay, of Jefferson county, Kentucky, who
+was then exhibiting her as a curiosity, but was anxious to sell
+her. Mr. Barnum had seen in some of the New York papers an
+account of Joice Heth, and was so much interested in her that he
+at once proceeded to Philadelphia to see her and Mr. Lindsay. How
+he was impressed by her he has himself told. "Joice Heth," he
+says, "was certainly a remarkable curiosity, and she looked as if
+she might have been far older than her age as advertised. She was
+apparently in good health and spirits, but from age or disease,
+or both, was unable to change her position; she could move one
+arm at will, but her lower limbs could not be straightened; her
+left arm lay across her breast and she could not remove it; the
+fingers of her left hand were drawn down so as nearly to close
+it, and were fixed; the nails on that hand were almost four
+inches long and extended above her wrist; the nails on her large
+toes had grown to the thickness of a quarter of an inch; her head
+was covered with a thick bush of grey hair; but she was toothless
+and totally blind, and her eyes had sunk so deeply in the sockets
+as to have disappeared altogether.
+
+"Nevertheless she was pert and sociable, and would talk as long
+as people would converse with her. She was quite garrulous about
+her protege, 'dear little George,' at whose birth she declared
+she was present, having been at the time a slave of Elizabeth
+Atwood, a half-sister of Augustine Washington, the father of
+George Washington. As nurse she put the first clothes on the
+infant, and she claimed to have 'raised him.' She professed to be
+a member of the Baptist Church, talking much in her way on
+religious subjects, and she sang a variety of ancient hymns.
+
+"In proof of her extraordinary age and pretensions, Mr. Lindsay
+exhibited a bill of sale, dated February 5, 1727, from Augustine
+Washington, county of Westmoreland, Virginia, to Elizabeth
+Atwood, a half-sister and neighbor of Mr. Washington, conveying
+'one negro women named Joice Heth, aged fifty-four years, for and
+in consideration of the sum of thirty-three pounds lawful money
+of Virginia.' It was further claimed that she had long been a
+nurse in the Washington family; she was called in at the birth of
+George and clothed the newborn infant. The evidence seemed
+authentic, and in answer to the inquiry why so remarkable a
+discovery had not been made before, a satisfactory explanation
+was given in the statement that she had been carried from
+Virginia to Kentucky, had been on the plantation of John S.
+Bowling so long that no one knew or cared how old she was, and
+only recently the accidental discovery by Mr. Bowling's son of
+the old bill of sale in the Record Office in Virginia had led to
+the identification of this negro woman as 'the nurse of
+Washington.' "
+
+Everything seemed to Barnum to be entirely straightforward, and
+he decided, if possible, to purchase the woman. She was offered
+to him at $1,000, although Lindsay at first wanted $3,000. Barnum
+had $500 in cash, and was able to borrow $500 more. Thus he
+secured Joice Heth, sold out his interest in the grocery business
+to his partner, and entered upon his career as a showman. He
+afterward declared that the least deserving of all his efforts in
+the show line was this one which introduced him to the business;
+it was a scheme in no sense of his own devising; but it was one
+which had been for some time before the public, and which he
+honestly and with good reason believed to be genuine. He entered
+upon his new work with characteristic enterprise, resorting to
+posters, transparencies, advertisements, newspaper paragraphs,
+and everything else calculated to attract the attention of the
+public, regardless of expense. He exhibited in New York, Boston,
+Philadelphia, Albany, and many other places, where his rooms were
+thronged and much money made. But in the following February Joice
+Heth died of old age, and was buried at Bethel. A postmortem
+examination was made by a surgeon and some medical students, who
+were inclined to doubt if she really was as old as Lindsay had
+said.
+
+Thus ended Barnum's first enterprise as a showman. It had been
+profitable to him, and had pointed out to him the path of
+success. His next venture was entirely genuine and
+straightforward. He engaged an Italian, who called himself Signor
+Antonio, and who was a skilful performer on stilts, on the tight
+rope and at juggling. Barnum engaged him for a year at $12 a week
+and his expenses, and got him to change his stage name to Signor
+Vivalla. He then resorted to his former means of advertising, and
+started on his tour. For Vivalla's first week of performances
+Barnum received $50, and for the second week three times as much.
+At the close of the first performance, in response to loud
+applause, Barnum appeared upon the stage and made a speech to the
+audience, a performance which he repeated thousands of times in
+after years. This engagement was at the Franklin Theatre in New
+York.
+
+The show next appeared in Boston, with great success. Next it
+went to Washington and had a most disastrous week, for every
+night was stormy. Indeed Barnum found himself literally stranded
+there, with not enough money to get away. He was driven to pawn
+his watch and chain for $35, and then met a friend who helped him
+out of his dilemma.
+
+"As this was my first visit to Washington, I was much
+interested," says Barnum, "in visiting the capitol and other
+public buildings. I also satisfied my curiosity in seeing Clay,
+Calhoun, Benton, John Quincy Adams, Richard M. Johnson, Polk, and
+other leading statesmen of the time. I was also greatly gratified
+in calling upon Anne Royall, author of the Black Book, publisher
+of a little paper called 'Paul Pry,' and quite a celebrated
+personage in her day. I had exchanged The Herald of Freedom with
+her journal, and she strongly sympathized with me in my
+persecutions. She was delighted to see me, and although she was
+the most garrulous old woman I ever saw, I passed a very amusing
+and pleasant time with her. Before leaving her I manifested my
+showman propensity by trying to hire her to give a dozen or more
+lectures on 'Government' in the Atlantic cities, but I could not
+engage her at any price, although I am sure the speculation would
+have been a very profitable one. I never saw this eccentric woman
+again; she died at a very advanced age, October 1, 1854, at her
+residence in Washington."
+
+From Washington the show went to Philadelphia and appeared at the
+Walnut Street Theatre. The audiences were small and it was
+evident that something must be done to arouse public interest.
+"And now," says Barnum, "that instinct which can arouse a
+community and make it patronize one, provided the article offered
+is worthy of patronage, an instinct which served me greatly in
+later years, astonishing the public and surprising me, came to my
+relief, and the help, curiously enough, appeared in the shape of
+an emphatic hiss from the pit!
+
+"This hiss, I discovered, came from one Roberts, a circus
+performer, and I had an interview with him. He was a professional
+balancer and juggler, who boasted that he could do all Vivalla
+had done and something more. I at once published a card in
+Vivalla's name, offering $1,000 to any one who would publicly
+perform Vivalla's feats at such place as should be designated,
+and Roberts issued a counter card accepting the offer. I then
+contracted with Mr. Warren, treasurer of the Walnut Street
+Theatre, for one-third of the proceeds, if I should bring the
+receipts up to $400 a night--an agreement he could well afford to
+make as his receipts the night before had been but seventy-five
+dollars. From him I went to Roberts, who seemed disposed to 'back
+down,' but I told him that I should not insist upon the terms of
+his published card, and ask him if he was under any engagement?
+Learning that he was not I offered him thirty dollars to perform
+under my direction one night at the Walnut, and he accepted. A
+great trial of skill between Roberts and Vivalla was duly
+announced by posters and through the press. Meanwhile, they
+rehearsed privately to see what tricks each could perform, and
+the 'business' was completely arranged.
+
+"Public excitement was at fever heat, and on the night of the
+trial the pit and upper boxes were crowded to the full. The
+'contest' between the performers was eager, and each had his
+party in the house. So far as I could learn, no one complained
+that he did not get all he paid for on that occasion. I engaged
+Roberts for a month, and his subsequent 'contests' with Vivalla
+amused the public and put money in my purse."
+
+In the spring of 1836 Barnum joined his show with Aaron Turner's
+travelling circus, himself acting as ticket seller, secretary and
+treasurer, at thirty dollars a month and one-fifth of the total
+profits, while Vivalla was to get fifty dollars a month. Barnum
+was himself paying Vivalla eighty dollars a month, so that he
+really had left for himself only his one-fifth share of the
+profits. The combined show set out from Danbury, Connecticut, for
+West Springfield, Massachusetts, on April 26. On the first day,
+Barnum relates, instead of stopping for dinner, Turner simply
+distributed to the company three loaves of rye bread and a pound
+of butter, which he bought at a farmhouse for fifty cents. On
+April 28 they began their performances at West Springfield, and
+as their band of music had not arrived from Providence, as
+expected, Barnum made a speech to the audience in place of it,
+which seemed to please everybody. The engagement was successful,
+and the tour was continued during the summer through numerous
+towns and cities in New England, the Middle States, Maryland,
+Virginia and North Carolina.
+
+Many incidents, humorous and otherwise, marked their progress. At
+Cabotville, Massachusetts, on going to bed one night one of the
+company threw a lighted cigar stump into a box of sawdust, and
+the result was that, an hour or two later, they all narrowly
+escaped suffocation from the smoke. At Lenox, Massachusetts, they
+spent Sunday and Barnum went to church as usual. The sermon was
+directed against the circus, denouncing it in very abusive terms
+as an immoral and degrading institution. "Thereupon," says
+Barnum, "when the minister had read the closing hymn, I walked up
+the pulpit stairs and handed him a written request, signed 'P. T.
+Barnum, connected with the circus, June 5, 1836,' to be permitted
+to reply to him. He declined to notice it, and after the
+benediction I lectured him for not giving me an opportunity to
+vindicate myself and those with whom I was connected. The affair
+created considerable excitement, and some of the members of the
+church apologized to me for their clergyman's ill behavior. A
+similar affair happened afterward at Port Deposit, on the lower
+Susquehanna, and in this instance I addressed the audience for
+half an hour, defending the circus company against the attacks of
+the clergyman, and the people listened, though their pastor
+repeatedly implored them to go home. Often have I collected our
+company on Sunday and read to them the Bible or a printed sermon,
+and one or more of the men frequently accompanied me to church.
+We made no pretense of religion, but we were not the worst people
+in the world, and we thought ourselves entitled to at least
+decent treatment when we went to hear the preaching of the
+Gospel."
+
+Turner, the proprietor of the circus, was a self-made man. He had
+made himself rich through industry, as he believed any other man
+with common sense could do, and he was very proud of the fact. He
+was also an inveterate practical joker, and once, at Annapolis,
+Maryland, he played upon Barnum a trick which came very near
+having a serious result. They got there on Saturday night, and
+the next morning Barnum went out for a walk, wearing a fine new
+suit of black clothes. As he passed through the bar-room and out
+of the hotel Turner said to some bystanders, who did not know
+Barnum:
+
+"I think it very singular that you permit that rascal to march
+your streets in open day. It wouldn't be allowed in Rhode Island,
+and I suppose that is the reason the scoundrel has come down this
+way."
+
+"Why, who is he?" they demanded.
+
+"Don't you know? Why, that is the Rev. E. K. Avery, the murderer
+of Miss Cornell."
+
+Instantly there was a rush of the whole crowd to the door, eager
+to get another look at Barnum, and uttering threats of vengeance.
+This man Avery had only lately been tried in Rhode Island for the
+murder of Miss Cornell, whose dead body was discovered in a
+stack-yard, and though he was acquitted by the court everybody
+believed him guilty. Accordingly, Barnum soon found himself
+overtaken and surrounded by a mob of one hundred or more and his
+ears saluted with such remarks as "the lecherous old hypocrite,"
+"the sanctified murderer," "the black-coated villain," "lynch
+him," "tar and feather him," and others still more harsh and
+threatening. Then one man seized him by the collar, while others
+brought a fence rail and some rope.
+
+"Come," said the man who collared him, "old chap, you can't walk
+any further; we know you, and as we always make gentlemen ride in
+these parts, you may just prepare to straddle that rail!"
+
+His surprise may be imagined. "Good heavens!" he exclaimed, as
+they all pressed around, "gentlemen, what have I done?"
+
+"Oh, we know you," exclaimed half a dozen voices; "you needn't
+roll your sanctimonious eyes; that game don't take in this
+country. Come, straddle the rail, and REMEMBER THE STACK-YARD!"
+
+He grew more and more bewildered; he could not imagine what
+possible offence he was to suffer for, and he continued to
+exclaim, "Gentlemen, what have I done? Don't kill me, gentlemen,
+but tell me what I have done."
+
+"Come, make him straddle the rail; we'll show him how to hang
+poor factory girls," shouted a man in the crowd.
+
+The man who had him by the collar then remarked "Come, MR. AVERY,
+it's no use; you see, we know you, and we'll give you a touch of
+lynch law, and start you for home again."
+
+"My name is NOT Avery, gentlemen; you are mistaken in your man,"
+he exclaimed.
+
+"Come, come, none of your gammon; straddle the rail, Ephraim."
+
+The rail was brought and Barnum was about to be placed on it,
+when the truth flashed upon him.
+
+"Gentlemen," he exclaimed, "I am not Avery; I despise that
+villain as much as you can; my name is Barnum; I belong to the
+circus which arrived here last night, and I am sure Old Turner,
+my partner, has hoaxed you with this ridiculous story."
+
+"If he has we'll lynch him," said one of the mob.
+
+"Well, he has, I'll assure you, and if you will walk to the hotel
+with me, I'll convince you of the fact."
+
+This they reluctantly assented to, keeping, however, a close hand
+upon him. As they walked up the main street, the mob received a
+re-enforcement of some fifty or sixty, and Barnum was marched
+like a malefactor up to the hotel. Old Turner stood on the piazza
+ready to explode with laughter. Barnum appealed to him for
+heaven's sake to explain this matter, that he might be liberated.
+He continued to laugh, but finally told them "he believed there
+was some mistake about it. The fact is," said he, "my friend
+Barnum has a new suit of black clothes on and he looks so much
+like a priest that I thought he must be Avery."
+
+The crowd saw the joke and seemed satisfied. Barnum's new coat
+had been half-torn from his back, and he had been very roughly
+handled. But some of the crowd apologized for the outrage,
+declaring that Turner ought to be served in the same way, while
+others advised Barnum to "get even with him." Barnum was very
+much offended, and when the mob-dispersed he asked Turner what
+could have induced him to play such a trick.
+
+"My dear Mr. Barnum," he replied, "it was all for our good.
+Remember, all we need to insure success is notoriety. You will
+see that this will be noised all about town as a trick played by
+one of the circus managers upon the other, and our pavilion will
+be crammed to-morrow night."
+
+It was even so; the trick was told all over town, and every one
+came to see the circus managers who were in a habit of playing
+practical jokes upon each other. They had fine audiences while
+they remained at Annapolis, but it was a long time before Barnum
+forgave Turner for his rascally "joke."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI. INCIDENTS OF A CIRCUS TOUR.
+
+BEATING A LANDLORD--A JOKE ON TURNER--BARNUM AS A PREACHER AND AS
+A NEGRO MINSTREL--A BAD MAN WITH A GUN--DEALING WITH A
+SHERIFF--"LADY HAYES"--AN EMBARASSED JUGGLER--BARNUM AS A
+MATRIMONIAL AGENT.
+
+At almost every place visited by the travelling company, some
+notable incident occurred. At Hanover Court House, Virginia, for
+example, it was raining so heavily that they could not give a
+performance, and Turner therefore decided to start for Richmond
+immediately after dinner. Their landlord, however, said that as
+their agent had engaged three meals and lodgings for the whole
+troupe, the whole bill must be paid whether they went then or
+stayed until next morning. No compromise could be made with the
+stubborn fellow, and Turner was equally stubborn in his
+determination both to go at once and also to have the worth of
+his money. The following programme was accordingly carried out,
+Turner insisting upon every detail:
+
+Dinner was ordered at twelve o'clock and was duly prepared and
+eaten. As soon as the table was cleared, supper was ordered, at
+half past twelve. After eating as much of this as their dinner
+had left room for, the whole company went to bed at one o'clock
+in the afternoon. Each man insisted upon taking a lighted candle
+to his room, and the whole thirty-six of them undressed and went
+to bed as though they proposed to stay all night. Half an hour
+later they arose and dressed again and went down to breakfast,
+which Turner had ordered served at two o'clock sharp. They could
+eat but little of this meal, of course, but they did the best
+they could, and at half past two in the afternoon were on their
+way to Richmond. Throughout the whole absurd proceedings the
+landlord was furiously angry. Turner was as solemn as a corpse,
+and the rest of the company were convulsed with laughter.
+
+After the performance one evening at Richmond, Barnum tried to
+pay Turner for that practical joke about the Rev. Mr. Avery. A
+score of the company were telling stories and singing songs in
+the sitting room of the hotel. Presently somebody began
+propounding some amusing arithmetical problems. Then Turner
+proposed one, which was readily solved. Barnum's turn came next,
+and he offered the following, for Turner's especial benefit:
+
+"Suppose a man is thirty years of age, and he has a child one
+year of age; he is thirty times older than his child. When the
+child is thirty years old, the father, being sixty, is only twice
+as old as his child. When the child is sixty the father is
+ninety, and therefore only one-third older than the child. When
+the child is ninety the father is one hundred and twenty, and
+therefore only one-fourth older than the child. Thus you see, the
+child is gradually but surely gaining on the parent, and as he
+certainly continues to come nearer and nearer, in time he must
+overtake him. The question therefore is, suppose it was possible
+for them to live long enough, how old would the father be when
+the child overtook him and became of the same age?"
+
+The company generally saw the catch; but Turner was very much
+interested in the problem, and although he admitted he knew
+nothing about arithmetic, he was convinced that as the son was
+gradually gaining on the father he must reach him if there was
+time enough--say, a thousand years, or so--for the race. But an
+old gentleman gravely remarked that the idea of a son becoming as
+old as his father while both were living, was simply nonsense,
+and he offered to bet a dozen of champagne that the thing was
+impossible, even "in figures." Turner, who was a betting man, and
+who thought the problem might be proved, accepted the wager; but
+he was soon convinced that however much the boy might relatively
+gain upon his father, there would always be thirty years
+difference in their ages. The champagne cost him $25, and he
+failed to see the fun of Barnum's arithmetic, though at last he
+acknowledged that it was a fair offset to the Avery trick.
+
+From Richmond they went to Petersburg, and thence to Warrenton,
+North Carolina, and there, on October 30, Barnum and Turner
+separated, Barnum's engagement having expired with a clear profit
+to himself of about $1,200. Barnum took Vivalla, a negro singer
+and dancer named James Sandford, several musicians, horses and
+wagons, and a small canvas tent. With these he proposed to carry
+on a travelling show of his own. His first stop was on Saturday,
+November 12, 1836, at Rocky Mount Falls, North Carolina. The next
+day, being Sunday, Barnum set out for church. "I noticed," he
+says, "a stand and benches in a grove near by, and determined to
+speak to the people if I was permitted. The landlord who was with
+me said that the congregation, coming from a distance to attend a
+single service, would be very glad to hear a stranger, and I
+accordingly asked the venerable clergyman to announce that after
+service I would speak for half an hour in the grove. Learning
+that I was not a clergyman, he declined to give the notice, but
+said that he had no objection to my making the announcement,
+which I did, and the congregation, numbering about three hundred,
+promptly came to hear me.
+
+"I told them I was not a preacher, and had very little experience
+in public speaking, but I felt a deep interest in matters of
+morality and religion, and would attempt in a plain way, to set
+before them the duties and privileges of man. I appealed to every
+man's experience, observation and reason, to confirm the Bible
+doctrine of wretchedness in vice and happiness in virtue. We
+cannot violate the laws of God with impunity, and He will not
+keep back the wages of well-doing. The outside show of things is
+of very small account. We must look to realities and not to
+appearances. 'Diamonds may glitter on a vicious breast,' but 'the
+soul's calm sunshine and the heart-felt joy is virtue's prize.'
+The rogue, the passionate man, the drunkard, are not to be envied
+even at the best, and a conscience hardened by sin is the most
+sorrowful possession we can think of."
+
+Barnum proceeded in this strain with various scriptural
+quotations and familiar illustrations, for three-quarters of an
+hour. At the end of his address several persons came up to shake
+hands with him, saying that they had been greatly pleased and
+edified by his remarks and asking to know his name. He went away
+feeling that possibly he had done some good by means of his
+impromptu preaching.
+
+The negro singer and dancer, Sandford, abruptly deserted the show
+at Camden, South Carolina, and left Barnum in a bad plight. An
+entertainment of negro songs had been advertised, and no one was
+able to fill Sandford's place. Barnum was determined, however,
+that his audience should not be disappointed, and so he blackened
+his own face and went on the stage himself, singing a number of
+plantation melodies. His efforts were received with great
+applause, and he was recalled several times. This performance was
+repeated for several evenings.
+
+One night after thus personating a negro, Barnum heard a
+disturbance outside the tent. Hastening to the spot he found a
+man quarreling with one of his company. He interfered, whereupon
+the man drew a pistol and pointing it at Barnum's head,
+exclaimed, "you black scoundrel! How dare you use such language
+to a white man?" He evidently took Barnum for a real negro, and
+in another moment would have blown his brains out. But quick as a
+flash the showman exclaim, "I am as white as you!" and at the
+same moment rolled up his sleeves showing the white skin of his
+arm. The other man dropped his pistol in consternation and humbly
+begged Barnum's pardon.
+
+"On four different occasions in my life," said Mr. Barnum not
+long before his death, "I have had a loaded pistol pointed at my
+head and each time I have escaped death by what seemed a miracle.
+I have also often been in deadly peril by accidents, and when I
+think of these things I realize my indebtedness to an
+all-protecting Providence. Reviewing my career, too, and
+considering the kind of company I kept for years and the
+associations with which I was surrounded and connected, I am
+surprised as well as grateful that I was not ruined. I honestly
+believe that I owe my preservation from the degradation of living
+and dying a loafer and a vagabond, to the single fact that I was
+never addicted to strong drink. To be sure, I have in times past
+drank liquor, but I have generally wholly abstained from
+intoxicating beverages, and for many years, I am glad to say, I
+have been a strict 'teetotaller.' "
+
+At Camden, Barnum also lost one of his musicians, a Scotchman
+named Cochran. This man was arrested and, in spite of Barnum's
+efforts to save him, imprisoned for many months for advising a
+negro barber who was shaving him to run away to the Free States
+or to Canada. To fill up his ranks Barnum now hired Bob White, a
+negro singer, and Joe Pentland, a clown, ventriloquist, comic
+singer, juggler, and sleight-of-hand performer, and also bought
+four horses and two wagons. He called this enlarged show
+"Barnum's Grand Scientific and Musical Theatre."
+
+At Raleigh, North Carolina, Barnum had sold a half interest in
+his show to a man called Henry,--not his real name. The latter
+now acted as treasurer and ticket taker. When they reached
+Augusta, Georgia, the Sheriff served a writ upon Henry for a debt
+of $500. As Henry had $600 of the Company's money in his pockets,
+Barnum at once secured a bill of sale of all his property in the
+exhibition. Armed with this he met Henry's creditor and his
+lawyer, who demanded the key of the stable, so that they might
+levy on the horses and wagons. Barnum asked them to wait a little
+while until he could see Henry, to which they agreed. Henry was
+anxious to cheat his creditor, and accordingly was glad to sign
+the bill of sale. Then Barnum returned and told the creditor and
+his lawyer that Henry would neither pay nor compromise the claim.
+The Sheriff thereupon demanded the stable key, so that he might
+attach Henry's share of the property. "Not yet," said Barnum,
+pulling out the bill of sale, "I am in possession as entire owner
+of this property. I have already purchased it, and you have not
+yet levied on it. You will touch my property at your peril."
+
+The creditor and the sheriff were thus baffled, but they
+immediately arrested Henry and took him to prison. The next day
+Barnum learned that Henry really owed $1,300, and that he had
+promised his creditor that he would pay him $500 of the company's
+money and a bill of sale of his interest in the show at the end
+of the Saturday night performance, in consideration of which the
+creditor was to allow him to take one of the horses and run away,
+leaving Barnum in the lurch. Learning this, Barnum was not
+disposed to help Henry any further. Finding that Henry had
+intrusted the $500 to Vivalla, to keep it from the sheriff,
+Barnum secured it from Vivalla on Henry's order, under pretense
+of securing bail for the prisoner. Then he paid the creditor the
+full amount obtained from Henry as the price of his half-interest
+and received in return an assignment of $500 of the creditor's
+claim and a guarantee that he should not be troubled by Henry for
+it. Thus his own promptness rescued Barnum from one of the most
+unpleasant situations in which he was ever placed.
+
+After this they got into one of the most desolate parts of
+Georgia. One night their advance agent, finding it impossible to
+reach the next town, arranged for the whole show to spend the
+night at a miserable and solitary hovel owned by an old woman
+named Hayes. The horses were to be picketed in a field, and the
+company were to sleep in the tent and the out houses. Posters
+were scattered over the country, announcing that a performance
+would be given there the next day, the agent thinking that, as a
+show was a rarity in that region, a considerable number of small
+farmers would be glad to attend.
+
+"Meanwhile," says Barnum, "our advertiser, who was quite a wag,
+wrote back informing us of the difficulty of reaching a town on
+that part of our route, and stating that he had made arrangements
+for us to stay over night on the plantation of 'Lady Hayes,' and
+that although the country was sparsely settled, we could
+doubtless give a profitable performance to a fair audience.
+
+"Anticipating a fine time on this noble 'plantation,' we started
+at four o'clock in the morning so as to arrive at one o'clock,
+thus avoiding the heat of the afternoon. Towards noon we came to
+a small river where some men, whom we afterwards discovered to be
+down-east Yankees, from Maine, were repairing a bridge. Every
+flooring plank had been taken up, and it was impossible for our
+teams to cross. 'Could the bridge be fixed so that we could go
+over?' I inquired. 'No; it would take half a day, and meantime,
+if we must cross, there was a place about sixteen miles down the
+river where we could get over. 'But we can't go so far as that;
+we are under engagement to perform on Lady Hayes's place
+to-night, and we must cross here. Fix the bridge and we will pay
+you handsomely.'
+
+"They wanted no money, but if we would give them some tickets to
+our show they thought they might do something for us. I gladly
+consented, and in fifteen minutes we crossed that bridge. The
+cunning rascals had seen our posters and knew we were coming; so
+they had taken up the planks of the bridge and had hidden them
+till they had levied upon us for tickets, when the floor was
+re-laid in a quarter of an hour.
+
+"Towards dinner-time we began to look out for the grand mansion
+of 'Lady Hayes,' and seeing nothing but little huts we quietly
+pursued our journey. At one o'clock--the time when we should have
+arrived at our destination--I became impatient, and riding up to
+a poverty-stricken hovel and seeing a ragged, bare-footed old
+woman, with her sleeves rolled up to her shoulders, who was
+washing clothes in front of the door, I inquired--" 'Hello! can
+you tell me where Lady Hayes lives?'
+
+"The old woman raised her head, which was covered with tangled
+locks and matted hair, and exclaimed--" 'Hey?'
+
+" 'No, Hayes, Lady Hayes; where is her plantation?'
+
+" 'This is the place,' she answered; 'I'm Widder Hayes, and you
+are all to stay here to-night.'
+
+"We could not believe our ears or eyes; but after putting the
+dirty old woman through a severe cross-examination she finally
+produced a contract, signed by our advertiser, agreeing for board
+and lodging for the company, and we found ourselves booked for
+the night. It appeared that our advertiser could find no better
+quarters in that forlorn section, and he had indulged in a joke
+at our expense by exciting our appetites and imaginations in
+anticipation of the luxuries we should find in the magnificent
+mansion of 'Lady Hayes.'
+
+"Joe Pentland grumbled, Bob White indulged in some very strong
+language, and Signor Vivalla laughed. He had travelled with his
+monkey and organ in Italy and could put up with any fare that
+offered. I took the disappointment philosophically, simply
+remarking that we must make the best of it and compensate
+ourselves when we reached a town next day.
+
+"The next forenoon we arrived at Macon, and congratulated
+ourselves that we had reached the regions of civilization.
+
+"In going from Columbus, Ga., to Montgomery, Ala., we were
+obliged to cross a thinly-settled, desolate tract, known as the
+'Indian Nation,' and as several persons had been murdered by
+hostile Indians in that region, it was deemed dangerous to travel
+the road without an escort. Only the day before we started, the
+mail stage had been stopped and the passengers murdered, the
+driver alone escaping. We were well armed, however, and trusted
+that our numbers would present too formidable a force to be
+attacked, though we dreaded to incur the risk. Vivalla alone was
+fearless and was ready to encounter fifty Indians and drive them
+into the swamp.
+
+"Accordingly, when we had safely passed over the entire route to
+within fourteen miles of Montgomery, and were beyond the reach of
+danger, Joe Pentland determined to test Vivalla's bravery. He had
+secretly purchased at Mt. Megs, on the way, an old Indian dress
+with a fringed hunting shirt and moccasins and these he put on,
+after coloring his face with Spanish brown. Then shouldering his
+musket he followed Vivalla and the party, and, approaching
+stealthily leaped into their midst with a tremendous whoop.
+
+"Vivalla's companions were in the secret, and they instantly fled
+in all directions. Vivalla himself ran like a deer and Pentland
+after him, gun in hand and yelling horribly. After running a full
+mile the poor little Italian, out of breath and frightened nearly
+to death, dropped on his knees and begged for his life. The
+'Indian' leveled his gun at his victim, but soon seemed to
+relent, and signified that Vivalla should turn his pockets inside
+out--which he did, producing and handing over a purse containing
+eleven dollars. The savage then marched Vivalla to an oak, and
+with a handkerchief tied him in the most approved Indian manner
+to the tree, leaving him half dead with fright.
+
+"Pentland then joined us, and washing his face and changing his
+dress, we all went to the relief of Vivalla. He was overjoyed to
+see us, and when he was released his courage returned; he swore
+that after his companions left him, the Indian had been
+re-inforced by six more, to whom, in default of a gun or other
+means to defend himself, Vivalla had been compelled to surrender.
+We pretended to believe his story for a week, and then told him
+the joke, which he refused to credit, and also declined to take
+the money which Pentland offered to return, as it could not
+possibly be his since seven Indians had taken his money. We had a
+great deal of fun over Vivalla's courage, but the matter made him
+so cross and surly that we were finally obliged to drop it
+altogether. From that time forward, however, Vivalla never
+boasted of his prowess."
+
+At the end of February, 1837, they reached Montgomery, and there
+Barnum sold a half interest in his show to Henry Hawley, a
+sleight-of-hand performer. He was a very clever fellow and was
+never known to be non-plussed or embarrassed in his tricks,
+except upon one occasion. This was when he was performing the
+well-known egg and bag trick, which he did with great success,
+taking egg after egg from the bag and finally breaking one to
+show that they were genuine. "Now," said he "I will show you the
+old hen that laid them." But it happened that the negro boy to
+whom had been intrusted the duty of supplying "properties," had
+made a slight mistake. The result was that Hawley triumphantly
+produced not "the old hen that laid the eggs," but a most
+palpable and evident rooster. The audience roared with laughter,
+and Hawley, completely taken aback, fled in confusion to his
+dressing room, uttering furious maledictions upon the boy who was
+the author of his woe.
+
+The show visited various places in Alabama, Tennessee and
+Kentucky, and finally disbanded at Nashville in May, 1837.
+Vivalla went to New York and gave some performances on his own
+account before sailing for Cuba. Hawley remained in Tennessee,
+and Barnum went home to his family. Early in July, however, he
+formed a new company and went back to rejoin Hawley. But they
+were not successful, and in August they parted again, Barnum
+forming a new partnership with one Z. Graves. He then went to
+Tiffin, Ohio, where he re-engaged Joe Pentland and got together
+the nucleus of a new company.
+
+During his short stay at Tiffin, Barnum got into a discussion
+with various gentlemen on religious subjects, and in response to
+their invitation lectured, or preached, in the school-house on
+Sunday afternoon and evening. He also went to the neighboring
+town of Republic and delivered two lectures.
+
+On his way back to Kentucky, just before he reached Cincinnati,
+he met a drove of hogs. One of the drivers made an insolent
+remark because the circus wagons interfered with the driving of
+the hogs, and Barnum responded angrily. Thereupon the fellow
+jumped from his horse, pointed a pistol at Barnum's breast and
+swore he would shoot him if he did not apologize. Barnum asked
+permission to speak first to a friend in the next wagon, after
+which, he said, he would give the man full satisfaction. The
+"friend" proved to be a loaded double barrelled gun, which Barnum
+leveled at the hog-driver's head, saying:
+
+"Now, sir, you must apologize, or have your brains blown out. You
+drew a weapon upon me for a careless remark. You seem to hold
+human life at a cheap price. Now you have the choice between a
+load of shot and an apology."
+
+The man apologized promptly, a pleasant conversation ensued, and
+they parted excellent friends.
+
+On this tour they exhibited at Nashville, where Barnum visited
+General Jackson at the Hermitage; at Huntsville, Tuscaloosa,
+Vicksburg and various other places, generally doing well. At
+Vicksburg they bought a steamboat and went down the river,
+stopping at every important landing to exhibit. At Natchez their
+cook deserted them, and Barnum set out to find another. He found
+a white woman who was willing to go, only she expected to marry a
+painter in that town, and did not want to leave him. Barnum went
+to see the painter and found that he had not fully made up his
+mind whether to marry the woman or not. Thereupon the
+enterprising showman told the painter that if he would marry the
+woman the next morning he would hire him for $25 a month as
+painter, and his bride at the same wages as cook, give them both
+their board and add a cash bonus of $50. There was a wedding on
+the boat the next day, and they had a good cook and a good
+dinner.
+
+During one evening performance at Francisville, Louisiana, a man
+tried to pass Barnum at the door of the tent, claiming that he
+had paid for admittance. Barnum refused him entrance; and as he
+was slightly intoxicated, he struck Barnum with a slung shot,
+mashing his hat and grazing what phrenologists call "the organ of
+caution." He went away and soon returned with a gang of armed and
+half-drunken companions, who ordered the showmen to pack up their
+"traps and plunder" and to get on board their steamboat within an
+hour. The big tent speedily came down. No one was permitted to
+help, but the company worked with a will, and within five minutes
+of the expiration of the hour they were on board and ready to
+leave. The scamps who had caused their departure escorted them
+and their last load, waving pine torches, and saluted them with a
+hurrah as they swung into the stream.
+
+The New Orleans papers of March 19th, 1838, announced the arrival
+of the "Steamer Ceres, Captain Barnum, with a theatrical
+company." After a week's performance, they started for the
+Attakapas country. At Opelousas they exchanged the steamer for
+sugar and molasses; the company was disbanded, and Barnum started
+for home, arriving in New York. June 4th, 1838.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII. HARD TIMES.
+
+ADVERTISING FOR A PARTNER--"QUAKER OATS"--DIAMOND THE DANCER--A
+DISHONEST MANAGER--RETURN TO NEW YORK--FROM HAND TO MOUTH--THE
+AMERICAN MUSEUM.
+
+Looking around now for some permanent business, Barnum at last
+resorted to the expedient of advertising for a partner, stating
+that he had $2,500 to invest, and was willing to add his entire
+personal attention to the business. He was immediately
+overwhelmed with answers, the most of them coming from sharpers.
+One was a counterfeiter who wanted $2,500 to invest in paper,
+ink, and dies.
+
+One applicant was a sedate individual dressed in sober drab; he
+proposed to buy a horse and wagon and sell oats in bags, trusting
+that no one would be particular in measuring after a Quaker.
+
+"Do you mean to cheat in measuring your oats?" asked Barnum.
+
+"Well," said the Quaker, with a significant leer, "I shall
+probably make them hold out."
+
+Finally Barnum decided to go into business with a good-looking,
+plausible German, named Proler, who was a manufacturer of
+paste-blacking, cologne, and bear's grease. They opened a store
+at No. 101 1/2 Bowery, where Proler manufactured the goods, and
+Barnum kept accounts and attended to sales in the store. The
+business prospered, or appeared to, until the capital was
+exhausted, and early in 1840 Barnum sold out his interest to
+Proler, taking the German's note for $2,600, which was all he
+ever got, Proler shortly afterward running away to Rotterdam.
+
+Barnum had formed the acquaintance of a very clever young dancer
+named John Diamond, and soon after leaving the paste-blacking
+enterprise, he gathered together a company of singers, etc.,
+which, with the dancer, Diamond, he placed in the hands of an
+agent, not caring to have his name appear in the transaction. He
+hired the Vauxhall Garden Saloon in New York and gave a variety
+of performances. This, however, proved unprofitable, and was
+abandoned after a few months.
+
+Much as Barnum dreaded resuming the life of an itinerant showman,
+there seemed nothing else to be done, so January 2d, 1841, found
+him in New Orleans, with a company consisting of C. D. Jenkins,
+an excellent Yankee character artist; Diamond, the dancer; a
+violinist, and one or two others. His brother-in-law, John
+Hallett, acted as advance agent. The venture was fairly
+successful, though after the first two weeks in New Orleans, the
+manager and proprietor of the show was obliged to pledge his
+watch as security for the board-bill. A dancing match between
+Diamond and a negro from Kentucky put nearly $500 into Barnum's
+pocket, and they continued to prosper until Diamond, after
+extorting as much money as possible from his manager, finally ran
+away. The other members of the troop caused considerable trouble
+later. Jenkins, the Yankee character man, went to St. Louis, and
+having enticed Francis Lynch, an orphan protege of Barnum's into
+the scheme, proceeded to the Museum, where he exhibited Lynch as
+the celebrated dancer, John Diamond. Barnum poured out his wrath
+at this swindler in a letter, for which Jenkins threatened suit,
+and actually did instigate R. W. Lindsay to bring an action
+against Barnum for a pipe of brandy, alleged to have been
+included in his contract. Being among strangers, Barnum had some
+difficulty in procuring the $500 bond required, and was committed
+to jail until late in the afternoon. As soon as he was released,
+he had Jenkins arrested for fraud, and then went on his way
+rejoicing.
+
+After an absence of eight months Barnum found himself back in New
+York, resolved never again to be a traveling showman. Contracting
+with the publisher, Robert Sears, for five hundred copies of
+"Sear's Pictorial Illustrations of the Bible," and accepting the
+United States agency for the book, he opened an office at the
+corner of Beekman and Nassau Streets. He advertised widely, had
+numerous agents, and sold thousands of books, but for all that,
+lost money.
+
+While engaged in this business the Vauxhall Saloon was re-opened,
+under the management of John Hallett, Mrs. Barnum's brother. At
+the end of the season they had cleared about $200. This sum was
+soon exhausted, and for the rest of the winter Barnum managed to
+eke out a living by writing for the Sunday papers, and getting up
+unique advertisements for the Bowery Amphitheatre.
+
+His ambition received a stimulus at last from a friend in
+Danbury, who held a mortgage on a piece of property owned by Mr.
+Barnum. Mr. Whittlesey wrote that as he was convinced of Mr.
+Barnum's inability to lay up money, he thought he might as well
+demand the five hundred dollars then as at any time. Barnum's
+flagging energies were aroused, and he began in earnest to look
+for some permanent investment.
+
+In connection with the Bowery Amphitheatre, the information came
+to him that the collection of curiosities comprising Scudder's
+American Museum, at the corner of Broadway and Ann Streets, was
+for sale. The original proprietor had spent $50,000 on it, and at
+his death had left a large fortune as the result of the
+speculation. It was now losing money and the heirs offered it for
+sale, at the low price of $15,000. Realizing that with tact,
+energy, and liberality, the business might be made as profitable
+as ever, Barnum resolved to buy it.
+
+"You buy the American Museum!" exclaimed a friend to whom he
+confided the scheme. "What will you buy it with?"
+
+"With brass," answered Barnum, "for silver and gold have I none."
+
+And buy it with brass he did, as the story of the transaction
+testifies.
+
+The Museum building belonged to Mr. Francis W. Olmsted, a retired
+merchant, to whom he wrote, stating his desire to buy the
+collection, and that although he had no means, if it could be
+purchased upon reasonable credit, he was confident that his tact
+and experience, added to a determined devotion to business, would
+enable him to make the payments when due. Barnum therefore asked
+him to purchase the collection in his own name; to give a writing
+securing it to Barnum, provided he made the payments punctually,
+including the rent of his building; to allow Barnum twelve
+dollars and a half a week on which to support his family; and if
+at any time he failed to meet the installment due, he would
+vacate the premises, and forfeit all that might have been paid to
+that date. "In fact, Mr. Olmsted." Barnum continued, earnestly,
+"you may bind me in any way, and as tightly as you please--only
+give me a chance to dig out, or scratch out, and I will do so or
+forfeit all the labor and trouble I may have incurred."
+
+In reply to this letter, which Barnum took to his house himself,
+Mr. Olmsted named an hour when he could call on him. Barnum was
+there at the exact moment, and Olmsted was pleased with his
+punctuality. He inquired closely as to Barnum's habits and
+antecedents, and the latter frankly narrated his experiences as a
+caterer for the public, mentioning his amusement ventures in
+Vauxhall Garden, the circus, and in the exhibitions he had
+managed at the South and West.
+
+"Who are your references?" Olmsted inquired.
+
+"Any man in my line," Barnum replied, "from Edmund Simpson,
+manager of the Park Theatre, or William Niblo, to Messrs. Welch,
+June, Titus, Turner, Angevine, or other circus or menagerie
+proprietors; also Moses Y. Beach, of the New York Sun."
+
+"Can you get any of them to call on me?"
+
+Barnum told him that he could, and the next day Mr. Niblo rode
+down and had an interview with Mr. Olmsted, while Mr. Beach and
+several other gentlemen also called. The following morning Barnum
+waited upon him for his decision.
+
+"I don't like your references, Mr. Barnum," said Mr. Olmsted,
+abruptly, as soon as he entered the room.
+
+Barnum was confused, and said, "he regretted to hear it."
+
+"They all speak too well of you," Olmsted added, laughing; "in
+fact, they all talk as if they were partners of yours, and
+intended to share the profits."
+
+"Nothing could have pleased me better," says Barnum. "He then
+asked me what security I could offer in case he concluded to make
+the purchase for me, and it was finally agreed that, if he should
+do so, he should retain the property till it was entirely paid
+for, and should also appoint a ticket-taker and accountant (at my
+expense), who should render him a weekly statement. I was further
+to take an apartment hitherto used as a billiard-room in his
+adjoining building, allowing therefor $500 a year, making a total
+rental of $3,000 per annum, on a lease of ten years. He then told
+me to see the administrator and heirs of the estate, to get their
+best terms, and to meet him on his return to town a week from
+that time.
+
+"I at once saw Mr. John Heath, the administrator, and his price
+was $15,000. I offered $10,000, payable in seven annual
+installments, with good security. After several interviews, it
+was finally agreed that I should have it for $12,000, payable as
+above --possession to be given on the 15th of November. Mr.
+Olmsted assented to this, and a morning was appointed to draw and
+sign the writings. Mr. Heath appeared, but said he must decline
+proceeding any further in my case, as he had sold the collection
+to the directors of Peale's Museum (an incorporated institution)
+for $15,000, and had received $1,000 in advance.
+
+"I was shocked, and appealed to Mr. Heath's honor. He said that
+he had signed no writing with me; was in no way legally bound,
+and that it was his duty to do the best he could for the heirs.
+Mr. Olmsted was sorry but could not help me; the new tenants
+would not require him to incur any risk, and my matter was at an
+end.
+
+"Of course I immediately informed myself as to the character of
+Peale's Museum Company. It proved to be a band of speculators who
+had bought Peale's collection for a few thousand dollars,
+expecting to unite the American Museum with it, issue and sell
+stock to the amount of $50,000, pocket $30,000 profits, and
+permit the stockholders to look out for themselves.
+
+"I went immediately to several of the editors, including Major M.
+M. Noah, M. Y. Beach, my good friends West, Herrick, and Ropes,
+of the Atlas, and others, and stated my grievances. 'Now,' said
+I, 'if you will grant me the use of your columns, I'll blow that
+speculation sky-high.' They all consented, and I wrote a large
+number of squibs, cautioning the public against buying the Museum
+stock, ridiculing the idea of a board of broken-down bank
+directors engaging in the exhibition of stuffed monkeys and
+gander-skins; appealing to the case of the Zoological Institute,
+which had failed by adopting such a plan as the one now proposed;
+and finally, I told the public that such a speculation would be
+infinitely more ridiculous than Dickens's 'Grand United
+Metropolitan Hot Muffin and Crumpit-baking and Punctual Delivery
+Company.'
+
+"The stock was 'as dead as a herring!' I then went to Mr. Heath
+and asked him when the directors were to pay the other $14,000.'
+On the 26th day of December, or forfeit the $1,000 already paid,'
+was the reply. I assured him that they would never pay it, that
+they could not raise it, and that he would ultimately find
+himself with the Museum collection on his hands, and if once I
+started off with an exhibition for the South, I could not touch
+the Museum at ANY price. 'Now,' said I, 'if you will agree with
+me confidentially, that in case these gentlemen do not pay you on
+the 26th of December I may have it on the 27th for $12,000, I
+will run the risk, and wait in this city until that date.' He
+readily agreed to the proposition, but said he was sure they
+would not forfeit their $1,000.
+
+" 'Very well,' said I; 'all I ask of you is, that this
+arrangement shall not be mentioned.' He assented. 'On the 27th
+day of December, at ten o'clock A. M., I wish you to meet me in
+Mr. Olmsted's apartments, prepared to sign the writings, provided
+this incorporated company do not pay you $14,000 on the 26th. He
+agreed to this, and by my request put it in writing.
+
+"From that moment I felt that the Museum was mine. I saw Mr.
+Olmsted, and told him so. He promised secrecy, and agreed to sign
+the document if the other parties did not meet their engagement.
+This was about November 15th, and I continued my shower of
+newspaper squibs at the new company, which could not sell a
+dollar's worth of its stock. Meanwhile, if any one spoke to me
+about the Museum, I simply replied that I had lost it."
+
+This newspaper war against the Peales was kept up unceasingly
+until one morning in December, "I received a letter from the
+secretary of that company (now calling itself the 'New York
+Museum Company'), requesting me to meet the directors at the
+Museum on the following Monday morning. I went, and found the
+directors in session. The venerable president of the board, who
+was also the ex-president of a broken bank, blandly proposed to
+hire me to manage the united museums, and though I saw that he
+merely meant to buy my silence, I professed to entertain the
+proposition, and in reply to an inquiry as to what salary I
+should expect, I specified the sum of $3,000 a year. This was at
+once acceded to, the salary to begin January 1st, 1842, and after
+complimenting me on my ability, the president remarked: 'Of
+course, Mr. Barnum, we shall have no more of your squibs through
+the newspapers.' To which I replied that I should 'ever try to
+serve the interests of my employers,' and I took my leave.
+
+"It was as clear to me as noonday that, after buying my silence
+so as to appreciate their stock, these directors meant to sell
+out to whom they could, leaving me to look to future stockholders
+for my salary. They thought, no doubt, that they had nicely
+entrapped me, but I knew I had caught them.
+
+"For, supposing me to be out of the way, and having no other
+rival purchaser, these directors postponed the advertisement of
+their stock to give people time to forget the attacks I had made
+on it, and they also took their own time for paying the money
+promised to Mr Heath, December 26th--indeed, they did not even
+call on him at the appointed time. But on the following morning,
+as agreed, I was promptly and hopefully at Mr. Olmsted's
+apartments with my legal adviser, at half-past nine o'clock; Mr.
+Heath came with his lawyer at ten, and before two o'clock that
+day I was in formal possession of the American Museum. My first
+managerial act was to write and dispatch the following
+complimentary note:
+
+ " 'AMERICAN MUSEUM, NEW YORK, Dec. 27th, 1841.
+" 'To the President and Directors of the New York Museum:
+
+" 'GENTLEMEN: It gives me great pleasure to inform you that you
+are placed upon the Free List of this establishment until furthur
+notice.
+                             " 'P. T. BARNUM, Proprietor.'
+
+"It is unnecessary to say that the 'President of the New York
+Museum' was astounded, and when he called upon Mr. Heath, and
+learned that I had bought and was really in possession of the
+American Museum, he was indignant. He talked of prosecution, and
+demanded the $1,000 paid on his agreement, but he did not
+prosecute, and he justly forfeited his deposit money."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII. THE AMERICAN MUSEUM.
+
+ADVERTISING EXTRAORDINARY--A QUICK-WITTED PERFORMER--NIAGARA
+FALLS WITH REAL WATER--OTHER ATTRACTIONS--DRUMMOND LIGHTS.
+
+With great hopes for the success of his project, Barnum entered
+upon the management of the Museum. It was a new epoch in his
+career, he felt that the opportunity of his life had presented
+itself--in the show business, to be sure, but in a permanent,
+substantial phase of it.
+
+He must pay for the establishment within the stipulated time, or
+forfeit all he had paid on account. A rigid plan of economy was
+determined upon, his wife agreeing to support the family on $600
+a year, or even on four hundred if necessary. Barnum himself made
+every possible personal retrenchment. One day, some six months
+after the purchase had been made, Mr. Olmsted happened into the
+ticket office, while the proprietor was eating his lunch of cold
+corned beef and bread.
+
+"Is that all you eat for dinner?" asked Mr. Olmsted.
+
+"I have not eaten a warm dinner, except on Sundays, since I
+bought the Museum," was the reply, "and I don't intend to, until
+I am out of debt."
+
+"That's right," said Mr. Olmsted, heartily, "and you'll pay for
+the Museum before the year is out."
+
+And he was right.
+
+The nucleus of this establishment, Scudder's Museum, was formed
+in 1810. It was begun in Chatham Street, and was afterward
+transferred to the old City Hall, and from small beginnings, by
+purchases, and to a considerable degree by presents, it had grown
+to be a large and valuable collection. People in all parts of the
+country had sent in relics and rare curiosities. Sea captains for
+years had brought and deposited strange things from foreign
+lands; and besides all these gifts, the previous proprietor had
+actually expended, as was stated, $50,000 in making the
+collection, which valuable as it was when Barnum bought it, was
+only the beginning of its subsequent greatness. In 1842 the
+entire contents of Peale's Museum was purchased, and in 1850 the
+Peale collection of Philadelphia was added. In 1865 the space
+occupied for museum purposes was more than twice as large as in
+1842. The Lecture Room, originally narrow, ill-contrived, and
+inconvenient, was so enlarged and improved that it became one of
+the most commodious and beautiful amusement halls in the city of
+New York. At first the attractions and inducements were merely
+the collection of curiosities by day, and an evening
+entertainment, consisting of such variety performances as were
+current in ordinary shows. Then Saturday afternoons and, soon
+afterward, Wednesday afternoons, were devoted to entertainments,
+and the popularity of the Museum grew so rapidly that it was
+presently found expedient and profitable to open the great
+Lecture Room every afternoon, as well as every evening, on every
+weekday in the year. The first experiments in this direction more
+than justified expectations, for the day exhibitions were always
+more thronged than those of the evening.
+
+Holidays, of course, were made the most of, and there is a record
+of twelve performances, to as many audiences, being given in one
+day.
+
+By degrees the character of the stage performances were changed.
+The transient attractions of the Museum were constantly
+diversified, and educated dogs, industrious fleas, automatons,
+jugglers, ventriloquists, living statuary, tableaux, gypsies,
+Albinoes, fat boys, giants, dwarfs, rope-dancers, live "Yankees,"
+pantomime, instrumental music, singing and dancing in great
+variety, dioramas, panoramas, models of Niagara, Dublin, Paris,
+and Jerusalem; Hannington's dioramas of the Creation, the Deluge,
+Fairy Grotto, Storm at Sea; the first English Punch and Judy in
+this country, Italian Fantoceini, mechanical figures, fancy
+glass-blowing, knitting machines, and other triumphs in the
+mechanical arts; dissolving views, American Indians, who enacted
+their warlike and religious ceremonies on the stage--these, among
+others, were all exceedingly successful.
+
+No man ever understood the art of advertising better than Barnum.
+Knowing that mammon is ever caught with glare, he took pains that
+his posters should be larger, his transparencies more brilliant,
+his puffing more persistent than anybody elses. And if he
+resorted to hyperbole at times in his advertisements, it was
+always his boast that no one ever went away from his Museum,
+without having received the worth of his money. It used to amuse
+Mr. Barnum later in life, to relate some of the unique
+advertising dodges which his inventive genius devised. Here is a
+fair sample, as he once told it:
+
+"One morning a stout, hearty-looking man came into my
+ticket-office and begged some money. I asked him why he did not
+work and earn his living? He replied that he could get nothing to
+do, and that he would be glad of any job at a dollar a day. I
+handed him a quarter of a dollar, told him to go and get his
+breakfast and return, and I would employ him, at light labor, at
+a dollar and a half a day. When he returned I gave him five
+common bricks.
+
+" 'Now,' said I, 'go and lay a brick on the sidewalk, at the
+corner of Broadway and Ann Street; another close by the Museum; a
+third diagonally across the way, at the corner of Broadway and
+Vesey Street, by the Astor House; put down the fourth on the
+sidewalk, in front of St. Paul's Church opposite; then, with the
+fifth brick in hand, take up a rapid march from one point to the
+other, making the circuit, exchanging your brick at every point,
+and say nothing to any one.'
+
+" 'What is the object of this?' inquired the man.
+
+" 'No matter,' I replied: 'all you need to know is that it brings
+you fifteen cents wages per hour. It is a bit of my fun, and to
+assist me properly you must seem to be as deaf as a post; wear a
+serious countenance; answer no questions; pay no attention to any
+one; but attend faithfully to the work, and at the end of every
+hour, by St. Paul's clock, show this ticket at the Museum door;
+enter, walking solemnly through every hall in the building; pass
+out, and resume your work.' "
+
+With the remark that "it was all one to him, so long as he could
+earn his living," the man placed his bricks, and began his round.
+Half an hour afterward, at least five hundred people were
+watching his mysterious movements. He had assumed a military step
+and bearing, and, looking as sober as a judge, he made no
+response whatever to the constant inquiries as to the object of
+his singular conduct. At the end of the first hour, the sidewalks
+in the vicinity were packed with people, all anxious to solve the
+mystery. The man, as directed, then went into the Museum,
+devoting fifteen minutes to a solemn survey of the halls, and
+afterward returning to his round. This was repeated every hour
+until sundown, and whenever the man went into the Museum a dozen
+or more persons would buy tickets and follow him, hoping to
+gratify their curiosity in regard to the purpose of his
+movements. This was continued for several days--the curious
+people who followed the man into the Museum considerably more
+than paying his wages--till finally the policeman, to whom Barnum
+had imparted his object, complained that the obstruction of the
+sidewalk by crowds, had become so serious that he must call in
+his "brick man." This trivial incident excited considerable talk
+and amusement; it advertised Barnum; and it materially advanced
+his purpose of making a lively corner near the Museum.
+
+Barnum realized above all that to have people pleased with his
+attractions was the best advertisement he could possibly have,
+and he tried honestly to keep the Museum supplied with every
+novelty. A curiosity which possessed some merit, and considerable
+absurdity was the celebrated model of Niagara, "with real water."
+
+One day the enterprising proprietor was called before the Board
+of Water Commissioners, and informed that he must pay a large
+extra compensation for the immense amount of water that supplied
+his Niagara. To the astonishment of the Board Mr. Barnum gave his
+assurance that a single barrel of water per month served to run
+the machine.
+
+Apropos of this wonderful model, Barnum used to tell how he got
+even with his friend, Louis Gaylord Clark, editor of the
+Knickerbocker, an inveterate joker, and who was fond of guying
+the Museum. The first time Clark viewed "Niagara" he assumed
+great admiration.
+
+"Well, Barnum, I declare, this is quite an idea; I never saw the
+like of this before in all my life."
+
+"No?" inquired Barnum, quite pleased.
+
+"No," said Clark, fervently, "and I hope to the Lord, I never
+will."
+
+Barnum might have forgiven this, but Clark's next joke was too
+much to bear. He came in one day and asked Barnum if he had the
+club with which Captain Cook was killed. The Museum boasted a
+large collection of Indian curiosities, and Barnum showed one
+warlike weapon which he assured Clark was the identical club and
+he had all the documents to prove it.
+
+"Poor Cook! Poor Cook!" said Clark, musingly. "Well, Mr. Barnum,"
+he continued, with great gravity, at the same time extending his
+hand, "I am really very much obliged to you for your kindness. I
+had an irrepressible desire to see the club that killed Captain
+Cook, and I felt quite confident you could accommodate me. I have
+been in half a dozen smaller museums, and as they all had it, I
+was sure a large establishment like yours would not be without
+it."
+
+But Barnum's turn came. A few weeks afterward, he wrote to Clark
+that if he would come to his office he was anxious to consult him
+on a matter of great importance. He came, and Barnum said:
+
+"Now, I don't want any of your nonsense, but I want your sober
+advice."
+
+Clark assured him that he would serve him in any way in his
+power, and Barnum proceeded to tell him about a wonderful fish
+from the Nile, offered for exhibition at $100 a week, the owner
+of which was willing to forfeit $5,000, if, within six weeks,
+this fish did not pass through a transformation in which the tail
+would disappear and the fish would then have legs.
+
+"Is it possible!" asked the astonished Clark.
+
+Barnum assured him that there was no doubt of it.
+
+Thereupon Clark advised Barnum to engage the wonder at any price;
+that it would startle the naturalists, wake up the whole
+scientific world, draw in the masses, and make $20,000 for the
+Museum. Barnum told him that he thought well of the speculation,
+only he did not like the name of the fish.
+
+"That makes no difference whatever," said Clark; "what is the
+name of the fish?"
+
+"Tadpole," Barnum replied, with becoming gravity, "but it is
+vulgarly called 'pollywog.' "
+
+"Sold, by thunder!" exclaimed Clark, and he left.
+
+Another story is illustrative of some of the trials incident to
+theatrical management.
+
+An actor named La Rue presented himself as an imitator of
+celebrated histrionic personages, including Macready, Forrest,
+Kemble, the elder Booth, Kean, Hamblin, and others. Taking him
+into the green-room for a private rehearsal, and finding his
+imitations excellent, Barnum engaged him. For three nights he
+gave great satisfaction, but early in the fourth evening he
+staggered into the Museum so drunk that he could hardly stand,
+and in half an hour he must be on the stage! Barnum called an
+assistant, and they took La Rue and marched him up Broadway as
+far as Chambers Street, and back to the lower end of the Park,
+hoping to sober him. At this point they put his head under a pump
+and gave him a good ducking, with visible beneficial effect, then
+a walk around the Park and another ducking, when he assured them
+that he should be able to give his imitations "to a charm."
+
+"You drunken brute," said Barnum, "if you fail, and disappoint my
+audience, I will throw you out of the window."
+
+He declared that he was "all right," and Barnum led him behind
+the scenes, where he waited with considerable trepidation to
+watch his movements on the stage. La Rue began by saying:
+
+"Ladies and gentlemen: I will now give you an imitation of Mr.
+Booth, the eminent tragedian."
+
+His tongue was thick, his language somewhat incoherent, and
+Barnum had great misgivings as he proceeded; but as no token of
+disapprobation came from the audience, he began to hope he would
+go through with his parts without exciting suspicion of his
+condition. But before he had half finished his representation of
+Booth, in the soliloquy in the opening act of Richard III, the
+house discovered that he was very drunk, and began to hiss. This
+only seemed to stimulate him to make an effort to appear sober,
+which, as is usual in such cases, only made matters worse, and
+the hissing increased. Barnum lost all patience, and, going on
+the stage and taking the drunken fellow by the collar, apologized
+to the audience, assuring them that he should not appear before
+them again. Barnum was about to march him off, when he stepped to
+the front, and said:
+
+"Ladies and gentlemen: Mr. Booth has often appeared on the stage
+in a state of inebriety, and I was simply giving you a truthful
+representation of him on such occasions. I beg to be permitted to
+proceed with my imitations."
+
+The audience at once supposed it was all right, and cried out,
+"go on, go on"; which he did, and at every imitation of Booth,
+whether as Richard, Shylock, or Sir Giles Overreach, he received
+a hearty round of applause. Barnum was quite delighted with his
+success; but when he came to imitate Forrest and Hamblin,
+necessarily representing them as drunk also, the audience could
+be no longer deluded; the hissing was almost deafening, and
+Barnum was forced to lead the actor off. It was his last
+appearance on that stage.
+
+Barnum always denied that the "Feejee Mermaid," which attained
+such lasting notoriety, was an invention of his own. It was first
+exhibited in London in 1822, where it was purchased by Mr. Moses
+Kimball, of the Boston Museum, who sold it to Barnum. The
+creature was really most ingeniously constructed, probably by
+some Japanese. It drew like magic, and afterward served as a good
+advertisement, sent throughout the country for exhibition, the
+posters reading, "From Barnum's Great American Museum, New York."
+
+Barnum believed in making his place of exhibition as attractive
+as possible, and the building was decorated with flags and
+banners, the posters were of the most sensational character, and
+the first "Drummond Lights" ever seen in New York were placed on
+top of the Museum, flooding the streets around with brilliance.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX. INCREASED POPULARITY OF THE MUSEUM.
+
+THE AMERICAN FLAG AND ST. PAUL'S--ST, PATRICK'S DAY--THE BABY
+SHOW--GRAND BUFFALO HUNT--N. P. WILLIS--THE FIRST WILD-WEST SHOW.
+
+The fame of the American Museum rose higher and higher. It is
+doubtful if any place of entertainment ever attracted such
+enthusiastic crowds. It was the first place visited by strangers
+in the city.
+
+The small Lecture Room had been converted into a large and
+beautiful theatre, and in it many afterward celebrated actors and
+actresses made their first appearance; Sothern, Barney Williams,
+and the charming Mary Garmon. On holidays there were lecture
+performances every hour. The actors kept on their stage clothes
+from eleven o'clock in the morning until ten at night, their
+meals were served in the green-room, and the company received
+extra pay.
+
+The 4th of July, 1842, was a great day in the history of the
+Museum. Barnum had planned a magnificent display of American
+flags, as one of the outside attractions, and applied to the
+vestrymen of St. Paul's Church, opposite the Museum, for
+permission to attach his flag-rope to a tree in the church-yard.
+Their reply was an indignant refusal. Returning to the Museum,
+Barnum directed that his original order concerning the
+disposition of the flags be carried out to the letter.
+
+The morning dawned, and the crowds on Broadway were admiring the
+display, when two representatives of the baffled vestry rushed
+into the office and demanded that the ropes be taken down. "The
+Church of St. Paul's, where Washington worshiped, attached to a
+Museum! Sacrilege!"
+
+Barnum assumed a conciliatory tone, reminding them that he always
+stopped his band playing during their week-day services, and
+suggesting the fairness of the obligation being made mutual.
+
+"If those flags are not down in ten minutes," cried one of the
+vestrymen, "I will cut them down."
+
+Then Barnum sprang to his feet and exclaimed loudly enough for
+the crowd to hear:
+
+"Well, Mister, I should just like to see you dare to cut down the
+American flag on the Fourth of July; you must be a 'Britisher' to
+make such a threat as that; but I'll show you a thousand pairs of
+Yankee hands in two minutes, if you dare to attempt to take down
+the Stars and Stripes on this great birthday of American
+freedom!"
+
+"What's that John Bull a-saying?" asked a brawny fellow, placing
+himself in front of the irate vestryman. "Look here, old fellow,"
+he continued, "if you want to save a whole bone in your body, you
+had better slope, and never dare to talk again about hauling down
+the American flag in the city of New York."
+
+Throngs of excited, exasperated men crowded around, and the
+vestryman, seeing the effect of the ruse, smiled faintly and
+said, "Oh, of course it is all right," and he and his companion
+quietly edged out of the crowd.
+
+By one o'clock that day, the Museum was so densely packed that no
+more visitors could be admitted, and the proprietor saw with
+despair the crowds being turned away from the door. Rushing
+down-stairs, he directed the carpenter to cut down the partition
+and floor in the rear and to put in a temporary flight of stairs.
+The egress was ready by three o'clock, and people poured out into
+Ann Street, while the crowd from Broadway poured in. After that,
+the egress was always ready on holidays. One of Barnum's most
+amusing reminiscences related to this egress.
+
+"Early in the following March I received notice from some of the
+Irish population that they meant to visit me in great numbers on
+'St. Patrick's day in the morning.' 'All right,' said I to my
+carpenter, 'get your egress ready for March 17th;' and I added,
+to my assistant manager: 'If there is much of a crowd, don't let
+a single person pass out at the front, even if it were St.
+Patrick himself; put every man out through the egress in the
+rear.' The day came, and before noon we were caught in the same
+dilemma as we were on the Fourth of July; the Museum was jammed,
+and the sale of tickets was stopped. I went to the egress and
+asked the sentinel how many hundreds had passed out?
+
+" 'Hundreds,' he replied, 'why only three persons have gone out
+by this way, and they came back, saying that it was a mistake and
+begging to be let in again.'
+
+" 'What does this mean?' I inquired; 'surely thousands of people
+have been all over the Museum since they came in.'
+
+" 'Certainly,' was the reply; 'but after they have gone from one
+saloon to another, and have been on every floor, even to the
+roof, they come down and travel the same route over again.'
+
+"At this time I espied a tall Irish woman with two good-sized
+children whom I had happened to notice when they came in early in
+the morning.
+
+" 'Step this way, madam,' said I, politely; 'you will never be
+able to get into the street by the front door without crushing
+these dear children. We have opened a large egress here, and you
+can thus pass by these rear stairs into Ann Street, and thus
+avoid all danger.'
+
+" 'Sure,' replied the woman, indignantly, 'an' I'm not going out
+at all, at all, nor the children either, for we've brought our
+dinners and we are going to stay all day.'
+
+"Further investigation showed that pretty much all of the
+visitors had brought their dinners with the evident intention of
+literally 'making a day of it.' No one expected to go home till
+night; the building was overcrowded, and hundreds were waiting at
+the front entrance to get in when they could. In despair, I
+sauntered upon the stage behind the scenes, biting my lips with
+vexation, when I happened to see the scene-painter at work, and a
+happy thought struck me. 'Here,' I exclaimed, 'take a piece of
+canvas four feet square and paint on it, as soon as you can, in
+large letters,
+
+                {pointing finger} TO THE EGRESS.'
+
+"Seizing his brush, he finished the sign in fifteen minutes, and
+I directed the carpenter to nail it over the door leading to the
+back stairs. He did so, and as the crowd, after making the entire
+tour of the establishment, came pouring down the main stairs from
+the third-story, they stopped and looked at the new sign, while
+some of them read audibly: 'To the Aigress.'
+
+" 'The Aigress,' said others, 'sure that's an animal we haven't
+seen,' and the throng began to pour down the back-stairs only to
+find that the 'Aigress ' was the elephant, and that the elephant
+was all out o' doors, or so much of it as began with Ann Street.
+Meanwhile, I began to accommodate those who had long been waiting
+with their money at the Broadway entrance."
+
+Barnum had planned to expend the entire profits of the first year
+in advertising, but so fast did the money pour in, that he was
+often embarrassed to devise means to get rid of it, according to
+his first idea. One of the most expensive advertisements
+consisted of a large number of oil paintings of every animal in
+zoology. These paintings were prepared secretly, and were put
+between the windows of the building at night. The town was
+paralyzed with astonishment, and the daily receipts took an
+upward jump of nearly a hundred dollars.
+
+Flower shows, dog shows, poultry and bird shows, with prizes to
+the best specimens, had long been features of the Museum, and at
+last Barnum rashly decided on a baby show. There was a prize of
+one hundred dollars attached, and a committee of ladies were
+appointed to decide on the best baby. The unsuspecting Barnum
+stepped into the circle and announced the prize winner, but to
+his astonishment the verdict did not suit anybody but the mother
+of one baby. The other ninety-nine indignant mothers "jumped on"
+to Mr Barnum and the committee, and denounced the whole
+proceeding as impartial and unjust. Barnum offered to let them
+select a new committee, and even agreed to give another hundred
+dollar prize, but the storm raged with unabating fury. There were
+baby shows after that, but the verdict was delivered in writing,
+and Mr. Barnum never gave the prize in person.
+
+In June, 1843, a herd of yearling buffaloes was on exhibition in
+Boston. Barnum bought the lot, brought them to New Jersey, hired
+the race-course at Hoboken, chartered the ferry-boats for one
+day, and advertised that a hunter had arrived with a herd of
+buffaloes, and that august 31st there would be a "Grand Buffalo
+Hunt" on the Hoboken race-course--all persons to be admitted free
+of charge.
+
+The appointed day was warm and delightful, and no less than
+twenty-four thousand people crossed the North River in the
+ferry-boats to enjoy the cooling breeze and to see the "Grand
+Buffalo Hunt." The hunter was dressed as an Indian, and mounted
+on horseback; he proceeded to show how the wild buffalo is
+captured with a lasso, but unfortunately the yearlings would not
+run till the crowd gave a great shout, expressive at once of
+derision and delight at the harmless humbug. This shout started
+the young animals into a weak gallop and the lasso was duly
+thrown over the head of the largest calf. The crowd roared with
+laughter, listened to the balcony band, which was also furnished
+"free," and then started for New York, little dreaming who was
+the author of this sensation, or what was its object.
+
+Mr. N. P. Willis, then editor of the Home Journal, wrote an
+article illustrating the perfect good nature with which the
+American public submit to a clever humbug. He said that he went
+to Hoboken to witness the buffalo hunt. It was nearly four
+o'clock when the boat left the foot of Barclay Street, and it was
+so densely crowded that many persons were obliged to stand on the
+railings and hold on to the awning-posts. When they reached the
+Hoboken side a boat equally crowded was coming out of the slip.
+The passengers just arriving cried out to those who were coming
+away, "Is the buffalo hunt over?" To which came the reply, "Yes,
+and it was the biggest humbug you ever heard of!" Willis added
+that passengers on the boat with him instantly gave three cheers
+for the author of the humbug, whoever he might be.
+
+After the public had enjoyed their laugh over the Buffalo hunt,
+Barnum let it become known that he was the author of the joke. Of
+course, their cry of "charlatan," "humbug," and "swindler" was
+louder than ever from that time, but Barnum never objected to
+being celled names. The more advertising the better.
+
+About this time Barnum engaged a band of Indians from Iowa.
+
+The party comprised large and noble specimens of the untutored
+savage, as well as several very beautiful squaws, with two or
+three interesting "papooses." They lived and lodged in a large
+room on the top floor of the Museum, and cooked their own
+victuals in their own way. They gave their war-dances on the
+stage in the Lecture Room with great vigor and enthusiasm, much
+to the satisfaction of the audiences. But these wild Indians
+seemed to consider their dances as realities. Hence, when they
+gave a real war-dance, it was dangerous for any parties, except
+their manager and interpreter to be on the stage, for the moment
+they had finished their war-dance, they began to leap and peer
+about behind the scenes in search of victims for their tomahawks
+and scalping knives! Indeed, lest in these frenzied moments they
+might make a dash at the orchestra or the audience, Barnum had a
+high rope barrier placed between them and the savages on the
+front of the stage.
+
+Barnum counted one incident in connection with his Indian show as
+notable, being one of the few occasions when he played the losing
+card.
+
+"After they had been a week in the Museum," he said, "I proposed
+a change of performance for the week following by introducing new
+dances. Among these was the Indian wedding dance. At that time I
+printed but one set of posters (large bills) per week, so that
+whatever was announced for Monday was repeated every day and
+evening during that week. Before the wedding dance came off on
+Monday afternoon, I was informed that I was to provide a large,
+new, red woolen blanket, at a cost of ten dollars, for the
+bridegroom to present to the father of the bride. I ordered the
+purchase to be made, but was considerably taken aback when I was
+informed that I must have another new blanket for the evening,
+inasmuch as the savage old Indian chief, father-in-law to the
+bridegroom, would not consent to his daughter's being approached
+with the wedding dance unless he had his blanket present,
+
+"I undertook to explain to the chief, through the interpreter,
+that this was only a 'make believe' wedding; but the old savage
+shrugged his shoulders, and gave such a terrific 'Ugh!' that I
+was glad to make my peace by ordering another blanket. As we gave
+two performances per day, I was out of pocket $120 for twelve
+'wedding blankets' that week."
+
+One of the beautiful squaws named Do-humme died in the Museum.
+She had been a great favorite with many ladies. Do-humme was
+buried on the border of Sylvan Water, at Greenwood Cemetery,
+where a small monument erected by her friends, designates her
+last resting-place. The poor Indians were very sorrowful for many
+days, and desired to get back again to their Western wilds. The
+father and the betrothed of Do-humme cooked various dishes of
+food and placed them upon the roof of the Museum, where they
+believed the spirit of their departed friend came daily for its
+supply; and these dishes were renewed every morning during the
+stay of the Indians at the Museum.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X. GIANTS AND DWARFS.
+
+SCIENCE FOR THE PUBLIC--MESMERISM EXTRAORDINARY--KILLING OF A
+RIVAL--THE TWO GIANTS--DISCOVERY OF "TOM THUMB"--SEEKING OTHER
+WORLDS TO CONQUER--FIRST VISIT TO ENGLAND.
+
+Barnum would never submit to being outdone by a rival. In "poker"
+parlance, he would "see him and go one better." His chief
+competitor now was Peale, who was running Peale's Museum, and
+proudly proclaiming it to be a more scientific institution than
+Barnum's. Thus, he said, he was catering to a higher class of
+patrons.
+
+"Science, indeed!" said Barnum. "I'll give him science to his
+heart's content!"
+
+Mesmerism was then a great novelty, and Peale was given
+exhibitions of it. He had one subject on whom he operated daily,
+with most surprising results; though at times she was
+unimpressionable, and the people who had paid to come in and see
+her performances complained loudly that they were being swindled.
+Barnum saw here a great opportunity to squelch a rival and
+increase his own fame at a single stroke. He engaged a bright
+little girl who was exceedingly susceptible to such mesmeric
+influences as he could induce. That is, she learned her lesson
+thoroughly, and when he had apparently put her to sleep with a
+few passes and stood behind her, she seemed to be duly
+"impressed," as he desired; raised her hands as he willed, fell
+from her chair to the floor; and if he put candy or tobacco into
+his own mouth, she was duly delighted or disgusted. She never
+failed in these routine performances. Strange to say, believers
+in mesmerism used to witness her performances with the greatest
+pleasure, and adduce them as positive proofs that there was
+something in mesmerism, and they applauded tremendously--up to a
+certain point.
+
+That point was reached when, leaving the girl "asleep," Barnum
+called up some one in the audience, promising to put him "in the
+same state" within five minutes, or forfeit fifty dollars. Of
+course, all his "passes" would not put a man in the mesmeric
+state; at the end of three minutes he was as wide awake as ever.
+
+"Never mind," Barnum would say, "looking at his watch; "I have
+two minutes more, and meantime, to show that a person in this
+state is utterly insensible to pain, I propose to cut off one of
+the fingers of the little girl who is still asleep." He would
+then take out a knife and feel of the edge, and when he turned
+around to the girl whom he left on the chair, she had fled behind
+the scenes, to the intense amusement of the greater part of the
+audience, and to the amazement of the mesmerists who were
+present.
+
+"Why! where's my little girl?" he asked, with feigned
+astonishment.
+
+"Oh! she ran away when you began to talk about cutting off
+fingers."
+
+"Then she was wide awake, was she?"
+
+"Of course she was, all the time."
+
+"I suppose so; and, my dear sir, I promised that you should be
+'in the same state' at the end of five minutes, and as I believe
+you are so, I do not forfeit fifty dollars."
+
+Barnum kept up this performance for several weeks, till he quite
+killed Peale's "genuine" mesmerism in the rival establishment. At
+the end of six months he bought Peale's Museum, and the whole,
+including the splendid gallery of American portraits, was removed
+to the American Museum, and he immediately advertised the great
+card of a "Double Attraction," and "Two Museums in One," without
+extra charge.
+
+Barnum was now devoting all his attention and energy to this
+enterprise, and was achieving great success. He made everything
+contribute to its popularity. When a politician asked him for
+what candidate he was going to vote, he would answer, "For the
+American Museum;" and this was an index of his whole demeanor.
+
+Among the genuine and literally "great" features of his show were
+several giants. They often gave both the showman and his patrons
+food for much amusement as well as wonder. The Quaker giant,
+Hales, was quite a wag in his way. He went once to see the new
+house of an acquaintance who had suddenly become rich, but who
+was a very ignorant man. When he came back he described the
+wonders of the mansion, and said that the proud proprietor showed
+him everything from basement to attic; parlors, bed-rooms,
+dining-room, and, said Hales, "what he calls his
+'study'--meaning, I suppose, the place where he intends to study
+his spelling-book!"
+
+He had at one time two famous men, the French giant, M. Bihin, a
+very slim man, and the Arabian giant, Colonel Goshen. These men
+generally got on together very well, though, of course, each was
+jealous of the other, and of the attention the rival received, or
+the notice he attracted. One day they quarreled, and a lively
+interchange of compliments ensued, the Arabian calling the
+Frenchman a "Shanghai," and receiving in return the epithet of
+"Nigger." From words both were eager to proceed to blows, and
+both ran to the collection of arms, one seizing the club with
+which Captain Cook, or any other man, might have been killed, if
+it were judiciously wielded, and the other laying hands on a
+sword of the terrific size which is supposed to have been
+conventional in the days of the Crusades.
+
+The preparations for a deadly encounter, and the high words of
+the contending parties, brought a dozen of the Museum attaches to
+the spot, and these men threw themselves between the gigantic
+combatants. Hearing the disturbance, Barnum ran from his private
+office to the dueling ground, and said:
+
+"Look here! This is all right; if you want to fight each other,
+maiming and perhaps killing one or both of you, that is your
+affair; but my interest lies here: you are both under engagement
+to me, and if this duel is to come off, I and the public have a
+right to participate. It must be duly advertised, and must take
+place on the stage of the Lecture Room. No performance of yours
+would be a greater attraction, and if you kill each other, our
+engagement can end with your duel."
+
+This proposition, made in apparent earnest, so delighted the
+giants that they at once burst into a laugh, shook hands, and
+quarreled no more.
+
+From giants to dwarfs. None of Barnum's attractions has been more
+famous than "Tom Thumb." The story of his discovery and
+engagement is dated in November, 1842. Barnum was then at
+Bridgeport, Conn. One day he heard that there belonged in one of
+the families of the place a phenomenally small child, and he got
+his brother, Philo F. Barnum, to bring the little fellow to his
+hotel. "He was," Barnum afterward said, "not two feet high; he
+weighed less than sixteen pounds, and was the smallest child I
+ever saw that could walk alone; he was a perfectly formed
+bright-eyed little fellow, with light hair and ruddy cheeks, and
+he enjoyed the best of health. He was exceedingly bashful, but
+after some coaxing, he was induced to talk with me, and he told
+me that he was the son of Sherwood E. Stratton, and that his own
+name was Charles S. Stratton. After seeing him and talking with
+him, I at once determined to secure his services from his parents
+and to exhibit him in public. I engaged him for four weeks, at
+three dollars a week, with all traveling and boarding charges for
+himself and his mother at my expense. They came to New York
+Thanksgiving day, December 8th, 1842, and I announced the dwarf
+on my Museum bills as 'General Tom Thumb.' "
+
+Barnum took the greatest pains to educate and train the
+diminutive prodigy, devoting many hours to the task by day and by
+night, and he was very successful, for the boy was an apt pupil,
+with a great deal of native talent, and a keen sense of the
+ludicrous. Barnum afterward re-engaged him for one year, at seven
+dollars a week with a gratuity of fifty dollars at the end of the
+engagement, and the privilege of exhibiting him anywhere in the
+United States, in which event his parents were to accompany him
+and Barnum was to pay all traveling expenses. He speedily became
+a public favorite, and long before the year was out, Barnum
+voluntarily increased his weekly salary to twenty-five dollars,
+and he fairly earned it.
+
+For two years Barnum had been the owner of the Museum. He had
+enjoyed great prosperity. Long ago he had paid every dollar of
+the purchase-money out of the profits of the place. All rivals
+had been driven from the field. He was out of debt, and had a
+handsome balance in the bank. The experimental stage was passed,
+and the enterprise was an established success. It was, indeed, in
+such perfect order that Barnum felt safe in leaving it to his
+lieutenants, while he went forth to seek new realms of conquest.
+Accordingly he made an agreement for General Tom Thumb's services
+for another year, at fifty dollars a week and all expenses, with
+the privilege of exhibiting him in Europe. He proposed to test
+the curiosity of men and women on the other side of the Atlantic.
+
+After arranging his business affairs for a long absence, and
+making every preparation for an extended foreign tour, on
+Thursday, January 18th, 1844, he went on board the new and fine
+sailing ship "Yorkshire," Captain D. G. Bailey, bound for
+Liverpool. The party included General Tom Thumb, his parents, his
+tutor, and Professor Guillaudeu, a French naturalist. They were
+accompanied by several personal friends, and the City Brass Band
+kindly volunteered to escort them to Sandy Hook.
+
+They were met at Liverpool by a large crowd of sight-seers, who
+had been attracted thither by the fame of "Tom Thumb." The
+curiosity of the populace was not gratified, however, for Barnum
+had the child smuggled ashore unseen, under his mother's shawl.
+
+"My letters of introduction," said the showman,  many excellent
+families, and I was induced to hire a hall and present the
+General to the public, for a short season in Liverpool. I had
+intended to proceed directly to London, and begin operations at
+'headquarters,' that is, in Buckingham Palace, if possible; but I
+had been advised that the royal family was in mourning for the
+death of Prince Albert's father, and would not permit the
+approach of any entertainments. Meanwhile, confidential letters
+from London informed me that Mr. Maddox, Manager of Princess's
+Theatre, was coming down to witness my exhibition, with a view to
+making an engagement. He came privately, but I was fully informed
+as to his presence and object. A friend pointed him out to me in
+the hall, and when I stepped up to him, and called him by name,
+he was 'taken all aback,' and avowed his purpose in visiting
+Liverpool. An interview resulted in an engagement of the General
+for three nights at Princess's Theatre. I was unwilling to
+contract for a longer period, and even this short engagement,
+though on liberal terms, was acceded to only as a means of
+advertisement. So soon, therefore, as I could bring my short, but
+highly successful, season in Liverpool to a close, we went to
+London."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI. TOM THUMB IN LONDON.
+
+AN ARISTOCRATIC VISITOR--CALLING AT BUCKINGHAM PALACE AND
+HOB-NOBBING WITH ROYALTY--GETTING A PUFF IN THE "COURT CIRCULAR"
+--THE IRON DUKE--A GREAT SOCIAL AND FINANCIAL SUCCESS.
+
+The first public appearance of Tom Thumb in London occurred soon
+after the arrival of the party there, at the Princess's Theatre.
+A short engagement only had been made, but it was exceedingly
+successful. The spectators were delighted, the manager overjoyed,
+and Barnum himself pleased beyond measure. This brief engagement
+answered his purpose, in arousing public interest and curiosity.
+That was all the shrewd showman wanted for the present.
+Accordingly, when the manager of the theatre urged a renewal of
+the engagement, at a much higher price, Barnum positively
+declined it. He had secured the desired advertising; now he would
+exhibit on his own account and in his own way.
+
+He therefore took a splendid mansion in Grafton Street, Bond
+Street, in the fashionable and aristocratic West End of London.
+Lord Talbot had lived in it, and Lord Brougham lived close by. It
+was an audacious stroke for the Yankee showman to invade this
+select and exclusive region, but it was successful. In response
+to his invitations members of the nobility came eagerly flocking
+to the house to see the wonderful child. Barnum showed himself as
+exclusive as any of them, for he gave orders to his servants that
+no callers were to be received who did not present cards of
+invitation. This procedure he afterward explained, was entirely
+proper. He had not yet announced himself as a public showman. He
+was simply an American citizen visiting London, and it was
+incumbent upon him to maintain the dignity of his position! His
+servants, of course, exercised proper tact, and no offense was
+given, although many of the nobility and gentry, who drove to his
+door in carriages adorned with crests and coats of arms, were
+thus turned away.
+
+Among the early callers was the Hon. Edward Everett, the American
+minister to England. He was much pleased with Mr. Barnum and his
+tiny ward, and had them dine with him the next day. He also
+promised that they should, if possible, be received by the Queen
+at Buckingham Palace.
+
+A few evenings afterward the Baroness Rothschild sent her
+carriage for them. They were received by a half a dozen servants,
+and were ushered up a broad flight of marble stairs to the
+drawing-room, where they met the Baroness and a party of twenty
+or more ladies and gentlemen. In this sumptuous mansion of the
+richest banker in the world, they spent about two hours, and when
+they took their leave a well-filled purse was quietly slipped
+into Mr. Barnum's hand. The golden shower had begun to fall.
+
+Mr. Barnum now thought the time ripe for beginning his public
+exhibitions. He engaged Egyptian Hall, Piccadilly, and announced
+that Tom Thumb was to be seen there. The rush of visitors was
+tremendous. The aristocracy of London thronged the hall night
+after night, and a phenomenal success was assured. Barnum did not
+look beyond such work. True, Everett had spoken of an audience
+with the Queen, but Barnum had no idea that it would ever be
+granted. One day, however, he met Mr. Murray, Master of the
+Queen's Household, at Everett's at breakfast, and that gentleman
+asked him what were his plans for the future. Barnum replied that
+he expected presently to go to the Continent, but he would most
+gladly stay in London if he could get the favor of an audience
+with Her Majesty.
+
+Mr. Murray kindly offered his good offices in the case, and the
+next day one of the Life Guards, a tall, noble-looking fellow,
+bedecked as became his station, brought a note, conveying the
+Queen's invitation to General Tom Thumb and his guardian Mr.
+Barnum, to appear at Buckingham Palace on an evening specified.
+Special instructions were the same day orally given by Mr.
+Murray, by Her Majesty's command, to suffer the General to appear
+before her, as he would appear anywhere else, without any
+training in the use of the titles of royalty, as the Queen
+desired to see him act naturally and without restraint.
+
+Determined to make the most of the occasion, Mr. Barnum put a
+placard on the door of the Egyptian Hall: "Closed this evening,
+General Tom Thumb being at Buckingham Palace by command of Her
+Majesty."
+
+When they arrived at the palace, a Lord-in-Waiting met them, and
+began "coaching" them on points of court etiquette. Mr. Barnum,
+especially, was told that he must in no event speak directly to
+Her Majesty, but through the medium of the aforesaid Lord. He
+must also keep his face constantly turned toward the Queen, and
+so, in retiring from the royal presence, must walk backward.
+Having thus been instructed in the ways of royalty, Mr. Barnum
+and the diminutive General were led to the presence of the Queen.
+
+They passed through a long corridor to a broad flight of marble
+steps, which led to the picture gallery, and there the Queen and
+Prince Albert, the Duchess of Kent, the Duke of Wellington, and
+others were awaiting their arrival. They were standing at the
+further end of the room when the doors were thrown open, and the
+General walked in, looking like a wax doll gifted with the power
+of locomotion. Surprise and pleasure were depicted on the
+countenances of the royal circle at beholding this remarkable
+specimen of humanity so much smaller than they had evidently
+expected to find him.
+
+The General advanced with a firm step, and, as he came within
+hailing distance, made a very graceful bow, and exclaimed, "Good
+evening, ladies and gentlemen."
+
+A burst of laughter followed this salutation. The Queen then took
+him by the hand, led him about the gallery, and asked him many
+questions, the answers to which kept the party in an
+uninterrupted strain of merriment. The General familiarly
+informed the Queen that her picture gallery was "first-rate," and
+told her he should like to see the Prince of Wales. The Queen
+replied that the Prince had retired to rest, but that he should
+see him on some future occasion. The General then gave his songs,
+dances, and imitations, and after a conversation with Prince
+Albert, and all present, which continued for more than an hour,
+they were permitted to depart.
+
+But before this Mr. Barnum had broken the instructions in
+etiquette which had been so carefully impressed upon him by the
+Lord-in-Waiting. When the Queen began asking him questions, he
+answered her, as she addressed him, through the lordly medium, as
+he had been told. That was inconvenient and irksome, however, and
+presently Barnum addressed his reply directly to her. The
+Lord-in-Waiting was horror-struck, but the Queen did not appear
+to be displeased, for she instantly followed her guest's example,
+and spoke thereafter directly to him. In a few minutes Her
+Majesty and the Yankee showman were talking together with the
+greatest ease and freedom.
+
+"I felt," said Mr. Barnum afterward, "entirely at ease in her
+presence, and could not avoid contrasting her sensible and
+amiable manners with the stiffness and formality of upstart
+gentility at home or abroad.
+
+"The Queen was modestly attired in plain black, and wore no
+ornaments. Indeed, surrounded as she was by ladies arrayed in the
+highest style of magnificence, their dresses sparkling with
+diamonds, she was the last person whom a stranger would have
+pointed out in that circle as the Queen of England.
+
+"The Lord-in-Waiting was perhaps mollified toward me when he saw
+me following his illustrious example in retiring from the royal
+presence. He was accustomed to the process, and therefore was
+able to keep somewhat ahead (or rather aback) of me, but even _I_
+stepped rather fast for the other member of the retiring party.
+We had a considerable distance to travel in that long gallery
+before reaching the door, and whenever the General found he was
+losing ground, he turned around and ran a few steps, then resumed
+his position of backing out, then turned around and ran, and so
+continued to alternate his methods of getting to the door, until
+the gallery fairly rang with the merriment of the royal
+spectators. It was really one of the richest scenes I ever saw;
+running, under the circumstances, was an offense sufficiently
+heinous to excite the indignation of the Queen's favorite poodle
+dog, and he vented his displeasure by barking so sharply as to
+startle the General from his propriety. He, however, recovered
+immediately, and with his little cane, commenced an attack on the
+poodle, and a funny fight ensued, which renewed and increased the
+merriment of the royal party.
+
+"This was near the door of exit. We had scarcely passed into the
+ante-room, when one of the Queen's attendants came to us with the
+expressed hope of her Majesty that the General had sustained no
+damage, to which the Lord-in-Waiting playfully added, that in
+case of injury to so renowned a personage, he should fear a
+declaration of war by the United States!"
+
+The visitors were then escorted about the Palace, and treated to
+refreshments. Before leaving Mr. Barnum bethought him of the
+"Court Circular," in which the doings of the Royal Family were
+chronicled to the world. Would his reception by the Queen be
+mentioned in it? Certainly. Well, then, would it not be possible
+to secure something more than mere mention; some words of special
+commendation; a "free advertisement" in fact? He would try it! So
+he inquired where he could find the gentleman who prepared the
+circular, and was informed that that functionary was in the
+Palace at that very moment.
+
+"He was sent for," related Mr. Barnum, "by my solicitation, and
+promptly acceded to my request for such a notice as would attract
+attention. He even generously desired me to give him an outline
+of what I sought, and I was pleased to see afterward, that he had
+inserted my notice verbatim.
+
+"This notice of my visit to the Queen wonderfully increased the
+attraction of 'Gen. Tom Thumb,' and compelled me to obtain a more
+commodious hall for my exhibition. I accordingly moved to a
+larger room in the same building."
+
+On their second visit to the Queen, they were received in what is
+called the Yellow Drawing Room, a magnificent apartment. It is on
+the north side of the gallery, and is entered from that
+apartment. It was hung with drapery of rich yellow satin damask,
+the couches, sofas, and chairs being covered with the same
+material. The vases, urns, and ornaments were all of the most
+exquisite workmanship. The room was panelled in gold, and the
+heavy cornices beautifully carved and gilt. The tables, pianos,
+etc., were mounted with gold, inlaid with pearl of various hues,
+and of the most elegant designs.
+
+They were ushered into this gorgeous drawing-room before the
+Queen and royal circle had left the dining-room, and, as they
+approached, the General bowed respectfully, and remarked to Her
+Majesty, "that he had seen her before," adding, "I think this is
+a prettier room than the picture gallery; that chandelier is very
+fine."
+
+The Queen smilingly took him by the hand, and said she hoped he
+was very well.
+
+"Yes, ma'am," he replied, "I am first-rate."
+
+"General," continued the Queen, "this is the Prince of Wales."
+
+"How are you, Prince?" said the General, shaking him by the hand,
+and then standing beside the Prince, he remarked, "the prince is
+taller than I am, but I feel as big as anybody," upon which he
+strutted up and down the room as proud as a peacock, amid shouts
+of laughter from all present.
+
+The Queen then introduced the Princess Royal, and the General
+immediately led her to his elegant little sofa, which he took
+with him, and with much politeness sat down beside her. Then,
+rising from his seat, he went through his various performances,
+and the Queen handed him an elegant and costly souvenir, which
+had been expressly made for him by her order, for which, he told
+her, "he was very much obliged, and would keep it as long as he
+lived." The Queen of the Belgians (daughter of Louis Philippe)
+was present on this occasion. She asked the General where he was
+going when he left London.
+
+"To Paris," he replied.
+
+"Whom do you expect to see there?" she continued.
+
+Of course all expected he would answer, "the King of the French,"
+but the little fellow replied.
+
+"Monsieur Guillaudeu."
+
+The two queens looked inquiringly, and when Mr. Barnum informed
+them that M. Guillaudeu was his French naturalist, they laughed
+most heartily.
+
+On their third visit to Buckingham Palace, Leopold, King of the
+Belgians, was also present. He was highly pleased, and asked a
+multitude of questions. Queen Victoria desired the General to
+sing a song, and asked him what song he preferred to sing.
+
+"Yankee Doodle," was the prompt reply.
+
+This answer was as unexpected to Mr. Barnum as it was to the
+royal party. When the merriment it occasioned had somewhat
+subsided, the Queen good-humoredly remarked, "that is a very
+pretty song, General, sing it, if you please." The General
+complied, and soon afterward retired.
+
+The Queen sent to Barnum a handsome fee for each of his visits,
+but that was only a small part of the benefits which his
+acquaintance with her brought to him. Such was the force of Court
+example that it was now deemed unfashionable, almost disloyal,
+not to have seen Tom Thumb. Carriages of the nobility, fifty or
+sixty at a time, were to be seen at Barnum's door in Piccadilly.
+Egyptian Hall was crowded at every exhibition, and the net
+profits there were on the average more than $500 per day from
+March 20th to July 20th. Portraits of the tiny General were for
+sale everywhere, and were eagerly purchased by thousands. Musical
+compositions were dedicated to him, and songs were sung in his
+honor. Week after week he was the subject of Punch's wittiest
+cartoons; and of course all this was just so much free
+advertising. Besides his three public performances per day, the
+little General attended three or four private parties per week,
+for which they were paid eight to ten guineas each. Frequently he
+would visit two parties in the same evening, and the demand in
+that line was much greater than the supply. The Queen Dowager
+Adelaide requested the General's attendance at Marlborough House
+one afternoon. He went in his court dress, consisting of a richly
+embroidered brown silk-velvet coat and short breeches, white
+satin vest with fancy colored embroidery, white silk stockings
+and pumps, wig, bagwig, cocked hat, and dress sword.
+
+"Why, General," said the Queen Dowager, "I think you look very
+smart to-day."
+
+"I guess I do," said the General, complacently.
+
+A large party of the nobility were present. The old Duke of
+Cambridge offered the little General a pinch of snuff, which he
+declined. The General sang his songs, performed his dances, and
+cracked his jokes, to the great amusement and delight of the
+distinguished circle of visitors.
+
+"Dear little General," said the kind-hearted Queen, taking him
+upon her lap, "I see you have no watch. Will you permit me to
+present you with a watch and chain?"
+
+"I would like them very much," replied the General, his eyes
+glistening with joy as he spoke.
+
+"I will have them made expressly for you," responded the Queen
+Dowager; and at the same moment she called a friend and desired
+him to see that the proper order was executed. A few weeks
+thereafter they were called again to Marlborough House. A number
+of the children of the nobility were present, as well as some of
+their parents. After passing a few compliments with the General,
+Queen Adelaide presented him with a beautiful little gold watch,
+placing the chain around his neck with her own hands.
+
+This watch, also, served the purpose of an advertisement, and a
+good one, too. It was not only duly heralded, but was placed upon
+a pedestal in the hall of exhibition, together with the presents
+from Queen Victoria, and covered with a glass vase. These
+presents, to which were soon added an elegant gold snuff-box
+mounted with turquois, presented by his grace the Duke of
+Devonshire, and many other costly gifts of the nobility and
+gentry, added to the attraction of the exhibition.
+
+The Duke of Wellington called frequently to see the little
+General at his public levees. The first time he called, the
+General was personating Napoleon Bonaparte, marching up and down
+the platform, and apparently taking snuff in deep meditation. He
+was dressed in the well-known uniform of the Emperor. Barnum
+introduced him to the "Iron Duke," who inquired the subject of
+his meditations. "I was thinking of the loss of the battle of
+Waterloo," was the little General's immediate reply. This display
+of wit was chronicled throughout the country, and was of itself
+worth thousands of pounds to the exhibition.
+
+General Tom Thumb had visited the King of Saxony and also Ibrahim
+Pacha, who was then in London. At the different parties he
+attended, he met, in the course of the season, nearly all of the
+nobility. Scarcely a nobleman in England failed to see General
+Tom Thumb at his own house, at the house of a friend, or at the
+public levees at Egyptian Hall. The General was a decided pet
+with some of the first personages in the land, among whom were
+Sir Robert and Lady Peel, the Duke and Duchess of Buckingham,
+Duke of Bedford, Duke of Devonshire, Count d'Orsay, Lady
+Blessington, Daniel O'Connell, Lord Adolphus Fitzclarence, Lord
+Chesterfield, and many other persons of distinction They had the
+free entree to all the theatres, public gardens, and places of
+entertainment, and frequently met the principal artists, editors,
+poets, and authors of the country. Albert Smith wrote a play for
+the General, entitled "Hop o' my Thumb," which was presented with
+great success at the Lyceum Theatre, London, and in several of
+the provincial theatres.
+
+Thus the London visit and the tour of England were successful
+beyond all anticipation, and it was with an overflowing purse
+that Barnum set out with his charge for the French capital.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII. IN FRANCE.
+
+ARRIVAL IN PARIS--VISIT TO THE TUILERIES--LONGCHAMPS--"TOM PONCE"
+ALL THE RAGE--BONAPARTE AND LOUIS PHILIPPE--TOUR THROUGH
+FRANCE--BARNUM'S PURCHASE.
+
+Barnum having returned from a preliminary trip to France, in
+which all arrangements, even to starting the first paragraphs in
+the Paris papers were made, now went back accompanied by Tom
+Thumb. They reached Paris some days before the exhibition was
+opened, but on the day following their arrival, a special command
+reached them to appear at the Tuileries on the next Sunday
+evening.
+
+At the appointed hour the General and his manager were ushered
+into the presence of the King, the Queen, the Count de Paris,
+Prince de Joinville, the Duchess d'Orleans, and a dozen more
+distinguished persons, among whom was the editor of the Journal
+des Debats.
+
+At the close of the General's performances, which he went through
+with to the evident delight of all present, the King gave him a
+large emerald and diamond brooch, at the same time saying to Mr.
+Barnum: "You may put it on the General, if you please." Which
+command was obeyed, to the gratification of the King and the
+immense delight of the General.
+
+The King was so condescending and affable that Mr. Barnum at
+length ventured to ask a favor of him. The Longchamps celebration
+was close at hand--a day once devoted to religious ceremony, but
+now conspicuous for the display of court and fashionable
+equipages in the various drives and parks--and after the King had
+conversed with Mr. Barnum on various topics in a familiar manner,
+the diplomatic showman remarked that he had hastened his arrival
+in Paris for the express purpose of taking part in the Longchamps
+celebration. The General's carriage, he explained, with its
+ponies and little coachman and footman, was so small that it
+would be in great danger in the crowd unless the King would
+graciously permit it to appear in the avenue reserved for the
+court and the diplomatic corps
+
+The King smiled, and after a few minutes' consultation with one
+of the officers of his household. said: "Call on the Prefect of
+Police to-morrow afternoon and you will find a permit ready for
+you."
+
+After a two hours' visit they retired, the General loaded with
+presents.
+
+The next morning all the newspapers chronicled the royal
+audience, the Journal des Debats giving a full account of the
+interview and of the General's performances.
+
+Thus all Paris knew that Tom Thumb, in all his glory, was in the
+city.
+
+Longchamps day arrived, and conspicuous among the splendid
+equipages on the grand avenue, Tom Thumb's beautiful little
+carriage, with four ponies and liveried and powdered coachman and
+footman, rode along in the line of carriages bearing the
+ambassadors to the Court of France. The air was fairly rent with
+cheers for "le General Tom Ponce."
+
+The first day's receipts were 5,500 francs--over three hundred
+dollars, and this sum might have been doubled had there been room
+for more visitors. The elite of Paris flocked to the exhibition.
+There were afternoon and evening performances, and seats were
+reserved in advance at an extra price for the entire two months.
+
+The papers were full of praises for the performance; Figaro gave
+a picture of an immense mastiff running away with the General's
+horse and carriage in his mouth.
+
+Statuettes and pictures of "Tom Ponce" appeared everywhere; a
+cafe on one of the boulevards took the name of "Tom Ponce," with
+a life-size statue of the General for a sign. Eminent painters
+here, as in London, asked to paint his portrait, but the
+General's engagements were so pressing that he had little time to
+sit to artists. All the leading actors and actresses came to see
+him, and he received many fine presents from them. The daily
+receipts continued to increase, and the manager had to take a cab
+to carry home the silver at night.
+
+Twice more was the General summoned to appear before the royal
+family at the Tuileries, and on the King's birthday a special
+invitation was sent him to view the display of fireworks in honor
+of the anniversary.
+
+The last visit to the Court was made at St. Cloud. The papers, in
+speaking of the General's characterizations, mentioned that there
+was one costume which Tom Thumb wisely kept at the bottom of his
+trunk. This was the uniform of Napoleon Bonaparte, and by special
+request of the King, it was worn at St. Cloud. The affair was
+quite sub rosa, however, none of the papers mentioning it.
+
+At the end of the visit each of the royal company gave the
+General a magnificent present, overwhelmed him with kisses,
+wishing him a safe journey through France, and a long and happy
+life. After making their adieux they retired to another part of
+the palace to permit the General to change his costume and to
+partake of a collation which was served them. As they were
+leaving the palace they passed the sitting-room where the royal
+family were spending the evening. The door was open, and some one
+spying the General there was a call for him to come in and shake
+hands once more. They went in, finding the Queen and her ladies
+engaged in embroidering, while one young lady read aloud. They
+all kissed and petted the General many times around before
+finally permitting him to depart.
+
+After leaving Paris they made a most profitable tour, including
+the cities of Rouen, Orleans, Brest, and Bordeaux, where they
+were invited to witness a review of 20,000 soldiers by the Dukes
+de Nemours and d'Aumale. Thence to Toulon, Montpelier, Nismes,
+Marseilles, and many other less important places. At Nantes,
+Bordeaux, and Marseilles the General appeared in the theatres in
+a part written for him in a French play called "Petit Poncet."
+
+During their stay in Paris, Barnum made a characteristically
+profitable investment. A Russian Prince, who had lived in great
+splendor in Paris, died suddenly, and his household effects were
+sold at auction. There was a magnificent gold tea-set, a dinner
+service of silver, and some rare specimens of Sevres china, the
+value of which were impaired by the Prince's initials being on
+them. The initials were "P. T ," and Mr. Barnum bought them, and
+adding "B." to the other letters, had a very fine table service
+appropriately marked.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIII. IN BELGIUM.
+
+PRESENTED TO KING LEOPOLD AND THE QUEEN--THE GENERAL'S JEWELS
+STOLEN--THE FIELD OF WATERLOO--AN ACCIDENT--AN EXPENSIVE
+EQUIPAGE--"THE CUSTOM OF THE COUNTRY."
+
+The day after the arrival of the party in Brussels they were
+summoned to the palace. The king and queen had seen the General
+in London, but they wished their children and the distinguished
+people of the court to have the same pleasure.
+
+After a delightful visit they came away, the General, as usual,
+laden with gifts.
+
+The following day the exhibition opened, and from the first was
+crowded by throngs of the best people in the city. One day, in
+the midst of the exhibition, it was discovered that the case
+containing all the valuable presents Tom Thumb had received from
+royalty' etc., was missing.
+
+The alarm was instantly given, and the police notified. A reward
+was offered of 2,000 francs, and, after a day or two, the thief
+was captured and the jewels returned. After that the case of
+presents was more carefully guarded.
+
+Everyone who goes to Brussels is supposed to visit the field of
+Waterloo; so, before they left, the entire party--Tom Thumb,
+Barnum, Prof. Pinte (tutor), and Mr. Stratton (father of the
+General), and Mr. H. G. Sherman, went together.
+
+After visiting the church in the village of Waterloo and viewing
+the memorial tablets there, they passed to the house where Lord
+Uxbridge--Marquis of Anglesey--had had his leg amputated. There
+is a little monument in the garden over the shattered limb, and a
+part of the boot that covered it was seen in the house. Barnum
+procured a three-inch bit of the boot for his Museum, at the same
+time remarking, that if the lady in charge was as liberal to all
+visitors, that boot had held out wonderfully since 1815.
+
+On approaching the ground they were beset by a dozen or more
+guides, each one professing to know the exact spot where every
+man had stood, and each claiming to have himself taken part in
+the struggle, although most of them were less than twenty-five,
+and the battle had been fought some thirty years before. They
+finally accepted one old man, who at first declared that he had
+been killed in the front ranks, but afterward acknowledged that
+he had only been wounded and left on the field for dead three
+days.
+
+After having the location of Napoleon's Guard, the Duke of
+Wellington, the portion of the field where Blucher entered with
+the Prussian army, pointed out to them, and the spots where fell
+Sir Alexander Gordon and other celebrities, they asked the guide
+if he knew where Captain Tippitiwichet, of Connecticut, was
+killed? "Oh, oui, Monsieur," replied the guide confidently. After
+pointing out the precise spots where fictitious friends from
+Coney Island, New Jersey, Cape Cod and Saratoga had received
+their death-wounds, they paid the old humbug and dismissed him.
+
+Upon leaving the field they were met by another crowd of peasants
+with relics of the battle for sale. Barnum bought a large number
+of pistols, bullets, brass French eagles, buttons, etc., for the
+Museum, and the others were equally liberal in their purchases.
+They bought also maps, guide-books and pictures, until Mr.
+Stratton expressed his belief that the "darned old battle of
+Waterloo" had cost more since it was fought than it ever did
+before.
+
+Some months afterwards, while they were in Birmingham, they made
+the acquaintance of a firm who manufactured and sent to Waterloo
+barrels of these "relics" every year.
+
+Four or five miles on the road home they had the misfortune to
+break the axle-tree of the carriage. It was past one o'clock, and
+the exhibition was advertised to commence in Brussels at two. Of
+course, they could not expect to walk the distance in less than
+three hours, and Barnum was disposed to give up the afternoon
+performance altogether. But Mr. Stratton could not bear the idea
+of losing six or eight hundred francs, so, accompanied by the
+interpreter, Prof. Pinte, he rushed down the road to a
+farm-house, followed leisurely by the rest of the party.
+
+Mr. Stratton asked the old farmer if he had a carriage. He had
+not. "Have you no vehicle?" he inquired.
+
+"Yes, I have that vehicle," he replied, pointing to an old cart
+filled with manure, and standing in his barnyard.
+
+"Thunder! is that all the conveyance you have got?" asked
+Stratton. Being assured that it was, Stratton concluded that it
+was better to ride in a manure-cart than not to get to Brussels
+in time.
+
+"What will you ask to drive us to Brussels in three-quarters of
+an hour?" demanded Stratton.
+
+"It is impossible," replied the farmer; "I should want two hours
+for my horse to do it in."
+
+"But ours is a very pressing case, and if we are not there in
+time we lose more than five hundred francs," said Stratton.
+
+The old farmer pricked up his ears at this, and agreed to get
+them to Brussels in an hour for eighty francs. Stratton tried to
+beat him down, but it was of no use.
+
+"Oh, go it, Stratton," said Sherman; "eighty francs you know is
+only sixteen dollars, and you will probably save a hundred by it,
+for I expect a full house at our afternoon exhibition to-day."
+
+"But I have already spent about ten dollars for nonsense," said
+Stratton, "and we shall have to pay for the broken carriage
+besides."
+
+"But what can you do better?" chimed in Professor Pinte.
+
+"It is an outrageous extortion to charge sixteen dollars for an
+old horse and cart to go ten miles. Why, in old Bridgeport, I
+could get it done for three dollars," replied Stratton, in a tone
+of vexation
+
+"It is the custom of the country," said Professor Pinte, "and we
+must submit to it."
+
+"Well, it's a thundering mean custom, anyhow," said Stratton,
+"and I won't stand such imposition."
+
+"But what shall we do?" earnestly inquired Mr. Pinte. "It may be
+a high price, but it is better to pay that than to lose our
+afternoon performance and five or six hundred francs."
+
+This appeal to the pocket touched Stratton's feelings; so,
+submitting to the extortion, he replied to our interpreter,
+"Well, tell the old robber to dump his dung-cart as soon as
+possible, or we shall lose half an hour in starting."
+
+The cart was "dumped" and a large, lazy-looking Flemish horse was
+attached to it with a rope harness. Some boards were laid across
+the cart for seats, the party tumbled into the rustic vehicle, a
+red-haired boy, son of the old farmer, mounted the horse, and
+Stratton gave orders to "get along." "Wait a moment," said the
+farmer, "you have not paid me yet." "I'll pay your boy when we
+get to Brussels, provided he gets there within the hour," replied
+Stratton.
+
+"Oh, he is sure to get there in an hour," said the farmer, "but I
+can't let him go unless you pay in advance." The minutes were
+flying rapidly, the anticipated loss of the day exhibition of
+General Tom Thumb flitted before his eyes, and Stratton, in very
+desperation, thrust his hand into his pocket and drew forth
+sixteen five-franc pieces, which he dropped, one at a time, into
+the hand, of the farmer, and then called out to the boy, "There
+now, do try to see if you can go ahead."
+
+The boy did go ahead, but it was with such a snail's pace that it
+would have puzzled a man of tolerable eyesight to have determined
+whether the horse was moving or standing still. To make it still
+more interesting, it commenced raining furiously. As they had
+left Brussels in a coach, and the morning had promised a pleasant
+day, they had omitted umbrellas. They were soon soaked to the
+skin, but they "grinned and bore it" a while without grumbling.
+At length Stratton, who was almost too angry to speak, desired
+Mr. Pinte to ask the red haired boy if he expected to walk his
+horse all the way to Brussels.
+
+"Certainly," replied the boy; "he is too big and fat to do
+anything but walk. We never trot him."
+
+Stratton was terrified as he thought of the loss of the day
+exhibition; and he cursed the boy, the cart, the rain, the luck,
+and even the battle of Waterloo itself. But it was all of no use;
+the horse would not run, but the rain did--down their backs.
+
+At two o'clock, the time appointed for the exhibition, they were
+yet some seven miles from Brussels. The horse walked slowly and
+philosophically through the pitiless storm, the steam
+majestically rising from the old manure-cart, to the no small
+disturbance of their unfortunate olfactories. "It will take two
+hours to get to Brussels at this rate," growled Stratton. "Oh,
+no," replied the boy; "it will only take about two hours from the
+time we started."
+
+"But your father agreed to get us there in an hour," answered
+Stratton.
+
+"I know it," responded the boy, "but he knew it would take more
+than two."
+
+"I'll sue him for damages, by thunder!" said Stratton.
+
+"Oh, there would be no use in that," chimed in Mr. Pinte, "for
+you could get no satisfaction in this country."
+
+"But I shall lose more than a hundred dollars by being two hours
+instead of one," said Stratton.
+
+"They care nothing about that; all they care for is your eighty
+francs," remarked Pinte.
+
+"But they have lied and swindled me," replied Stratton.
+
+"Oh, you must not mind that; it is the custom of the country."
+
+The party arrived in Brussels precisely two hours and a half from
+the time they left the farmer's house. Of course it was too late
+for the afternoon performance, and hundreds of people had been
+turned away disappointed.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIV. IN ENGLAND AGAIN.
+
+EGYPTIAN HALL AND THE ZOOLOGICAL GARDENS--THE SPECIAL
+TRAIN--OXFORD--STRATFORD-ON-AVON--GUY OF WARWICK RELICS--PURCHASE
+OF THE "HAPPY FAMILY"--RETURN TO AMERICA.
+
+In London the General again opened his levees in Egyptian Hall,
+with increased success. His unbounded popularity on the
+Continent, and his receptions by King Louis Philippe, of France,
+and King Leopold, of Belgium, had added greatly to his prestige
+and fame. Those who had seen him when he was in London months
+before came to see him again, and new visitors crowded by
+thousands to the General's levees.
+
+Besides giving these daily entertainments, the General appeared
+occasionally for an hour, during the intermissions, at some place
+in the suburbs; and for a long time he appeared every day at the
+Surrey Zoological Gardens, under the direction of the proprietor,
+Mr. W. Tyler. This place subsequently became celebrated for its
+great music hall, in which Spurgeon, the sensational preacher,
+first attained his notoriety. The place was always crowded, and
+when the General had gone through with his performances on the
+little stage, in order that all might see him, he was put into a
+balloon, which, secured by ropes, was then passed around the
+ground, just above the people's heads. Some forty men managed the
+ropes and prevented the balloon from rising; but, one day, a
+sudden gust of wind took the balloon fairly out of the hands of
+half the men who had hold of the ropes, while others were lifted
+from the ground, and had not an alarm been instantly given, which
+called at least two hundred to the rescue, the little General
+would have been lost.
+
+In October Barnum made a flying visit to America, remaining long
+enough to renew the lease of the Museum building, and to attend
+to various other business matters. When he returned he was
+accompanied by his wife and daughters. They took a furnished
+house, which, during all their three months' residence, was the
+scene of constant hospitality, all the distinguished people in
+London being entertained there.
+
+When the engagement at Egyptian Hall expired they made an
+extensive tour through England and Scotland, going as far north
+as Aberdeen. The General's Scotch costumes, his national dances
+and the "bit of dialect" which he had acquired had long been a
+feature of the performance and was especially admired in
+Scotland. The party travelled much of the time in Barnum's own
+carriage, the General's carriage, ponies and other properties
+being conveyed in a huge van. They found this way of travelling
+more comfortable than the other, besides enabling them to visit
+out of the way places, where often the most successful
+exhibitions were given.
+
+There was one occasion when their carriage broke down, and, as
+they had advertised a performance in Rugby that evening, they
+decided to take the cars; but on arriving at the station they
+found the last train gone. Barnum immediately looked up the
+superintendent and told him that they must have an extra train
+for Rugby, without an instant's delay.
+
+"Extra train?" said he, with surprise and a half-sneer, "extra
+train? why you can't have an extra train to Rugby for less than
+sixty pounds."
+
+"Is that all? well, get up your train immediately, and here are
+your sixty pounds. What in the world are sixty pounds to me, when
+I wish to go to Rugby, or elsewhere, in a hurry."
+
+The astonished superintendent took the money, bustled about, and
+the train was soon ready. He was greatly puzzled to know what
+distinguished person--he thought he must be dealing with some
+prince, or, at least, a duke--was willing to give so much money
+to save a few hours of time, and he hesitatingly asked whom he
+had the honor of serving.
+
+"General Tom Thumb."
+
+The performance at Rugby netted L160, which not only covered
+expenses but left a handsome margin.
+
+When they were in Oxford, a dozen or more of the students came to
+the conclusion that, as the General was a little fellow, the
+admission fee to his entertainments should be paid in the
+smallest kind of money. They accordingly provided themselves with
+farthings, and as each man entered, instead of handing in a
+shilling for his ticket, he laid down forty-eight farthings. The
+counting of these small coins was a great annoyance to Mr.
+Stratton, the General's father, who was ticket-seller, and after
+counting two or three handfuls, vexed at the delay which was
+preventing a crowd of ladies and gentlemen from buying tickets,
+Mr. Stratton lost his temper, and cried out:
+
+"Blast your quarter-pennies! I am not going to count them! you
+chaps who haven't bigger money can chuck your copper into my hat
+and walk in."
+
+Mr. Stratton was a genuine Yankee, and thoroughly conversant with
+the Yankee vernacular which he used freely. In exhibiting the
+General, Barnum often said to visitors that Tom Thumb's parents,
+and the rest of the family, were persons of the ordinary size,
+and that the gentleman who presided in the ticket-office was the
+General's father. This made poor Stratton an object of no little
+curiosity, and he was pestered with all sorts of questions; on
+one occasion an old dowager said to him:
+
+"Are you really the father of General Tom Thumb?"
+
+"Wa'al," replied Stratton, "I have to support him!"
+
+This evasive answer is common enough in New England, but the
+literal dowager had her doubts, and promptly rejoined:
+
+"I rather think he supports you!"
+
+Although Barnum was in Europe on business, he made the most of
+his opportunities for sight-seeing, and in his few leisure hours
+managed to visit nearly every place of interest both in England
+and on the continent.
+
+While in Birmingham, with his friend Albert Smith, then author
+and afterwards a successful showman, he visited
+Stratford-on-Avon, where lived and wrote the greatest of English
+poets--Shakespeare.
+
+While breakfasting at the Red House Inn, at Stratford, they
+called for a guide-book of the town, and to Barnum's great
+delight the volume proved to be Washington Irving's
+"Sketch-book." His pleasure was even more increased when he
+discovered, on reading the vivid and picturesque description of
+Stratford, that Irving had stopped at the very same hotel where
+they were awaiting breakfast.
+
+After visiting the house as well as the church where is the tomb
+of the poet, they took a post-chaise for Warwick Castle, fourteen
+miles away.
+
+The Earl of Warwick and his family being absent, the visitors
+were shown through the apartments. One guide took them over the
+Castle, another escorted them to the top of "Guy's Tower,"
+another showed them the famous Warwick Vase. They were
+congratulating themselves on not being called upon for any more
+tips, when the old porter at the lodge informed them that for a
+consideration he could show them more interesting things
+connected with the Castle than any they had yet seen. They tossed
+him his fee, and he produced what purported to be Guy of
+Warwick's sword, shield, helmet, breastplate, walking-staff, etc.
+The armor must have weighed two hundred pounds and the sword
+alone one hundred. Barnum listened, and gazed in silence at the
+horse-armor, large enough for an elephant, and a pot called
+"Guy's porridge-pot," which could have held seventy gallons, but
+when the old man produced the ribs of a mastodon which he
+declared had belonged to a huge dun cow, which had done much
+injury to many persons before being slain by the dauntless Guy,
+he drew a long breath, and feelingly congratulated the old porter
+on his ability to concentrate more lies than anyone had ever
+before heard in so small a compass.
+
+"I suppose," said Barnum, "that you have told these marvellous
+tales so often that you almost believe them yourself."
+
+"Almost," answered the old man, with a broad grin.
+
+"Come now, old fellow," continued Barnum,  "what will you take
+for the entire lot of these old traps? I want them for my Museum
+in America."
+
+"No money would buy these priceless relics of a bygone age,"
+replied the porter, leering.
+
+"Never mind," exclaimed the showman; "I'll have them duplicated
+for my Museum, so that Americans can see them without coming
+here, and in that way I'll burst up your old show."
+
+The porter was paralyzed with astonishment at this threat, and
+Albert Smith was convulsed with laughter. He afterwards told
+Barnum that he first derived his idea of becoming a showman from
+this day at Warwick, and Barnum's talk about his doings and
+adventures in the business.
+
+They visited that same day Kenilworth and Coventry, in which
+latter place Barnum discovered the exhibition known as the "Happy
+Family," about two hundred birds and animals of opposite natures,
+dwelling in one cage in perfect harmony. He was so delighted with
+it that he bought it on the spot, and hired the manager to
+accompany the exhibition to New York, where it became a famous
+feature of the Museum.
+
+Albert Smith afterwards published a chapter in Bentley's
+Magazine, entitled "A Day with Barnum," in which he said they
+accomplished business with such rapidity that, when he attempted
+to write out the accounts of the day, he found the whole thing so
+confused in his brain that he came near locating "Peeping Tom" in
+the house of Shakespeare, while Guy of Warwick WOULD stick his
+head above the ruins of Kenilworth, and the Warwick Vase appeared
+in Coventry.
+
+With the exception of two brief trips to America, Barnum had been
+abroad with General Tom Thumb three years. The season had been
+one of unbroken pleasure and profit. They had visited nearly
+every city and town in France, Belgium, England, Scotland, and
+the cities of Belfast and Dublin in Ireland. After this truly
+triumphant tour, they set sail in February, 1847, for New York.
+
+Barnum was a man who never could bear to see injustice done. On
+one of his business trips to America he took passage on a Cunard
+steamer, commanded by a Captain Judkins. Among the passengers was
+the celebrated preacher, Robert Baird. One Sunday after dinner
+Barnum asked Mr. Baird if he would be willing to preach to the
+passengers in the forward cabin. The captain had read the
+Episcopal service that morning, but it was done as a mere matter
+of form, without the slightest suggestion of devotion in its
+observance.
+
+Mr. Baird consented to preach, and Barnum, after mentioning it to
+the other passengers, who were delighted at the prospect, went to
+the captain and said: "Captain, the passengers desire to have Dr.
+Baird conduct a religious service in the forward cabin. I suppose
+there is no objection?" The rest of the story may as well be told
+in Barnum's own words. To his inquiry, the captain replied
+gruffly:
+
+"Decidedly there is, and it will not be permitted."
+
+"Why not?"
+
+"It is against the rules of the ship."
+
+"What! to have religious services on board?"
+
+"There have been religious services once to-day, and that is
+enough. If the passengers do not think that is good enough, let
+them go without," was the captain's hasty and austere reply.
+
+"Captain," Barnum replied, "do you pretend to say you will not
+allow a respectable and well-known clergyman to offer a prayer
+and hold religious services on board your ship at the request of
+your passengers?"
+
+"That, sir, is exactly what I say. So, now, let me hear no more
+about it."
+
+By this time a dozen passengers were crowding around his door,
+and expressing their surprise at his conduct. Barnum was
+indignant, and used sharp language.
+
+"Well," said he, "this is the most contemptible thing I ever
+heard of on the part of the owners of a public passenger ship.
+Their meanness ought to be published far and wide."
+
+"You had better 'shut up,' " said Captain Judkins, with great
+sternness.
+
+"I will not 'shut up,' " he replied; "for this thing is perfectly
+outrageous. In that out-of-the-way forward cabin you allow, on
+week-days, gambling, swearing, smoking and singing till late at
+night; and yet on Sunday you have the impudence to deny the
+privilege of a prayer-meeting, conducted by a gray-haired and
+respected minister of the gospel. It is simply infamous!"
+
+Captain Judkins turned red in the face; and, no doubt feeling
+that he was "monarch of all he surveyed," exclaimed in a loud
+voice:
+
+"If you repeat such language, I will put you in irons."
+
+"Do it, if you dare," said Barnum, feeling his indignation rising
+rapidly. "I dare and defy you to put your finger on me. I would
+like to sail into New York harbor in handcuffs, on board a
+British ship, for the terrible crime of asking that religious
+worship may be permitted on board. So you may try it as soon as
+you please; and, when we get to New York, I'll show you a touch
+of Yankee ideas of religious intolerance."
+
+Turning on his heel, he walked over to Mr. Baird and told him how
+matters stood, adding, with a laugh:
+
+"Doctor, it may be dangerous for you to tell of this incident
+when you get on shore; for it would be a pretty strong draught
+upon the credulity of many of my countrymen if they were told
+that my zeal to hear an orthodox minister preach was so great
+that it came near getting me into solitary confinement. But I am
+not prejudiced, and I like fair play."
+
+The old doctor replied: "Well, you have not lost much; and, if
+the rules of this ship are so stringent I suppose we must
+submit."
+
+The captain afterwards came to Barnum and apologized for the rude
+manner in which he had carried out the rules of the ship. Barnum
+was not at the time a teetotaler, and the two men "washed down"
+their differences in a bottle of champagne, and were excellent
+friends from that moment.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XV. AT HOME.
+
+PARTNERSHIP WITH TOM THUMB--VISIT TO CUBA--IRANISTAN, HIS FAMOUS
+PALACE AT BRIDGEPORT--AGRICULTURAL EXPERIENCES--BARNUM'S
+GAME-KEEPER AND THE GREAT GAME DINNER--FRANK LESLIE.
+
+One of Barnum's principal objects in returning to America at this
+time was to insure the permanence of his "American Museum." He
+had a lease of the property, which had yet three years to run.
+But he wanted to make sure of it after that term had expired. Mr.
+Olmsted, the former owner, was now dead, and It was not certain
+that the new proprietor would renew the lease. If not, another
+home for the great show must be secured, and Barnum decided that
+in that event he would buy land on Broadway and erect a building
+to suit him. The new owner of the old property was persuaded,
+however, to renew the lease for a term of twenty-five years. The
+building covered an area of fifty-six by one hundred feet and was
+four stories high. Barnum agreed to pay for it a rental of
+$10,000 a year in addition to the taxes and all assessments.
+Then, as the place was not large enough for his purposes, he
+rented and connected with it the upper floors of several adjacent
+buildings. The Museum was at this time enormously prosperous, and
+was thronged with visitors from morning to late at night.
+
+Tom Thumb's European reputation was of course a great
+advertisement, and it was "worked for all it was worth." He
+appeared at the Museum daily for four weeks, and drew such crowds
+of visitors as had never been seen there before. He afterwards
+spent a month in Bridgeport with his kindred. To prevent being
+annoyed by the curious, who would be sure to throng the houses of
+his relatives, he exhibited two days at Bridgeport, and the
+receipts, amounting to several hundred dollars, were presented to
+the Bridgeport Charitable Society.
+
+Barnum's contract with Tom Thumb had expired on January 1, 1845,
+while they were in England, and they had then formed a
+partnership, dividing equally between them the profits of their
+enterprise; excepting during the first four weeks of their return
+to New York, during which time the General waived his partnership
+rights and exhibited himself for a salary of $50 a week. Mr.
+Stratton, Tom Thumb's father, was now a rich man, and he settled
+a handsome fortune upon his tiny son.
+
+Soon a tour of America was arranged, the party consisting of Mr.
+Barnum and Tom Thumb and his parents. They began at Washington,
+in April, 1847, where they visited President and Mrs. Polk at the
+White House. Thence they went to Richmond, to Baltimore, and to
+Philadelphia, where they took in  $5,594.91 in twelve days. Next
+they visited Boston and Lowell; Providence, where they received
+nearly $1,000 in a day; New Bedford, Fall River, Salem,
+Worcester, Springfield, Albany, Troy, Niagara Falls, Buffalo and
+various other places. During the whole year's tour their receipts
+averaged from $400 to $500 per day, and their expenses only from
+$25 to $30. On their way back to New York they stopped at all
+large towns along the Hudson river, and then went to New Haven,
+Hartford, Portland and some other New England cities.
+
+Absence did not make them forgotten in New York, however, but
+only increased public interest in them. When he returned to his
+Museum Mr. Barnum found that he himself had come to be regarded
+as one of its chief curiosities. "If I showed myself about the
+Museum, or wherever else I was known, I found eyes peering and
+fingers pointing at me, and could frequently overhear the remark,
+'There's Barnum.' On one occasion, soon after my return, I was
+sitting in the ticket-office, reading a newspaper. A man came and
+purchased a ticket of admission. 'Is Mr. Barnum in the Museum?'
+he asked. The ticket-seller, pointing to me, answered, 'This is
+Mr. Barnum.' Supposing the gentleman had business with me, I
+looked up from the paper. 'Is this Mr. Barnum?' he asked. 'It
+is,' I replied. He stared at me for a moment, and then, throwing
+down his ticket, exclaimed, 'It's all right; I have got the worth
+of my money;' and away he went, without going into the Museum at
+all."
+
+In the fall of 1847 they went South, visiting and giving
+exhibitions at Charleston, Columbia, Augusta, Savannah,
+Milledgeville, Macon, Columbus, Montgomery, Mobile and New
+Orleans. At the last-named place they spent three weeks,
+including the Christmas holidays. After New Year's they went to
+Cuba, and were received at Havana by the Captain-General and the
+aristocracy of the city. For a month they gave exhibitions in
+Havana and Matanzas with great success. The only serious drawback
+was the hotels, which they did not find good; indeed, it was
+difficult for them to get enough to eat. The Washington House, at
+Havana, where they lived for some time, was characterized by Mr.
+Barnum as "first-rate bad!"
+
+From Cuba they returned to New Orleans, and thence to New York by
+way of the Mississippi river, St. Louis, Louisville, Cincinnati
+and Pittsburg. And then, in May, 1848, it was agreed that Barnum
+should travel no more with the little General. "I had," says
+Barnum, "competent agents who could exhibit him without my
+personal assistance, and I preferred to relinquish a portion of
+the profits rather than continue to be a travelling showman. I
+had now been a straggler from home most of the time for thirteen
+years, and I cannot describe the feelings of gratitude with which
+I reflected that, having by the most arduous toil and
+deprivations succeeded in securing a satisfactory competence, I
+should henceforth spend my days in the bosom of my family."
+
+Barnum had selected the city of Bridgeport, Conn., for his home,
+and thither he now repaired. He wanted to be near New York, and
+he considered the northern shore of Long Island Sound the most
+beautiful country he had ever seen. Bridgeport was about the
+right distance from New York, and was well situated. It was also
+an enterprising place, with the promise of a prosperous future.
+Some three or four years before this time Barnum had purchased
+seventeen acres of land at the western side of the city, and for
+two years had been building a palace upon it, the famous
+"Iranistan," which was now nearly ready for him to occupy.
+
+In telling how he came to erect this gorgeous and eccentric home,
+Barnum once said that in visiting Brighton, England, he had been
+greatly pleased with the pavilion built there by George IV. It
+was at that time the only specimen of Oriental architecture in
+England, and the style had not been introduced into America. "I
+concluded to adopt it, and engaged a London architect to furnish
+me a set of drawings after the general plan of the pavilion,
+differing sufficiently to be adapted to the spot of ground
+selected for my homestead. On my second return visit to the
+United States, I brought these drawings with me and engaged a
+competent architect and builder, giving him instructions to
+proceed with the work, not 'by the job' but 'by the day,' and to
+spare neither time nor expense in erecting a comfortable,
+convenient, and tasteful residence. The work was thus begun and
+continued while I was still abroad, and during the time when I
+was making my tour with General Tom Thumb through the United
+States and Cuba. Elegant and appropriate furniture was made
+expressly for every room in the house. I erected expensive
+water-works to supply the premises. The stables, conservatories
+and out-buildings were perfect in their kind. There was a
+profusion of trees set out on the grounds. The whole was built
+and established literally 'regardless of expense,' for I had no
+desire even to ascertain the entire cost."
+
+Into this splendid place he moved on November 14, 1848, nearly a
+thousand fellow-citizens of Bridgeport, rich and poor alike,
+participating in the "housewarming" as his guests. The estate was
+called, in reference to its Oriental appearance, Iranistan, which
+being interpreted means "a Persian home." This name was the
+subject of many a joke, as the place itself was of much
+wonderment and admiration.
+
+The next two years were spent by Mr. Barnum chiefly at home with
+his family, though he paid frequent visits to his various places
+of business and amusement; business for him, amusement for the
+world. He had for several years a fine Museum in Baltimore, which
+was afterward the property of John E. Owens, the actor. In 1849
+he also opened a Museum in Philadelphia, at the corner of
+Chestnut and Seventh streets. He spent some time in Philadelphia,
+until the Museum was profitably established, and then turned it
+over to a manager. Two years later he sold it for a good price.
+While he was running it, however, his old rival, Peale, conducted
+a strong opposition show in Masonic Hall, near by. The
+competition between them proved disastrous to Peale, who failed
+and was sold out by the sheriff. Barnum and his friend, Moses
+Kimball, purchased most of his effects and divided them between
+Barnum's American Museum in New York and Kimball's Museum in
+Boston.
+
+Barnum took an active interest in the affairs of Bridgeport and
+of the State of Connecticut. In 1848, soon after settling in
+Iranistan, he was elected President of the Fairfield County
+Agricultural Society. He was not much of a practical farmer,
+although he had bought a hundred or more acres of farm land near
+his residence and felt a deep interest in agricultural affairs.
+He had imported a lot of choice livestock, which he had at
+Iranistan, and had gone pretty deeply into fancy poultry raising.
+So he was considered eligible to the office of President of the
+Agricultural Society.
+
+In 1849 the Society insisted that he should deliver the annual
+address. "I begged to be excused on the ground of incompetency,"
+he said, "but my excuses were of no avail, and as I could not
+instruct my auditors in farming, I gave them the benefit of
+several mistakes which I had committed. Among other things, I
+told them that in the fall of 1848 my head-gardener reported that
+I had fifty bushels of potatoes to spare. I thereupon directed
+him to barrel them up and ship them to New York for sale. He did
+so, and received two dollars per barrel, or about sixty-seven
+cents per bushel. But, unfortunately, after the potatoes had been
+shipped, I found that my gardener had selected all the largest
+for market, and left my family nothing but 'small potatoes' to
+live on during the winter. But the worst was still to come. My
+potatoes were all gone before March, and I was obliged to buy,
+during the spring, over fifty bushels of potatoes, at $1.25 per
+bushel! I also related my first experiment in the arboricultural
+line, when I cut from two thrifty rows of young cherry-trees any
+quantity of what I supposed to be 'suckers,' or 'sprouts,' and
+was thereafter informed by my gardener that I had cut off all his
+grafts!"
+
+A friend of Barnum's, Mr. J. D. Johnson, had a fine place near
+Iranistan; and Barnum owned a couple of acres just beyond and
+adjoining his property. This plot Barnum presently converted into
+a deer park, stocking it with fine animals from the Rocky
+Mountains. From its location, however, everybody supposed it to
+be a part of Johnson's estate, and to confirm this notion--in a
+waggish spirit--a member of Johnson's family put up in the park a
+conspicuous sign, which every passer-by on the street could read:
+
+"All persons are forbid trespassing on these grounds, or
+disturbing the deer.
+                   --J. D. JOHNSON."
+
+Barnum "acknowledged the corn," and was much pleased with the
+joke. Johnson was delighted, and bragged considerably of having
+got ahead of Barnum, and the sign remained undisturbed for
+several days. It happened, at length, that a party of friends
+came to visit him from New York, arriving in the evening. Johnson
+told them that he had got a capital joke on Barnum; he would not
+explain, but said they should see it for themselves the next
+morning. Bright and early he led them into the street, and, after
+conducting them a proper distance, wheeled them around in front
+of the sign. To his dismay he discovered that I had added
+directly under his name the words "Game-keeper to P. T. Barnum."
+
+Thereafter Mr. Johnson was known among his friends and
+acquaintances as "Barnum's gamekeeper."
+
+Johnson had his revenge, however. Some time afterward Barnum
+became president of the Pequonnock Bank, and gave each year a
+grand dinner at Iranistan to the directors. In preparing for
+these banquets he would send to the West for some boxes of
+prairie chickens and other choice game. So, one day, Johnson saw
+a big case at the railroad station, addressed to Barnum, and
+marked "Game."
+
+"See here," said he to the station-master, "I am Mr. Barnum's
+game-keeper, and I'll take charge of that!"
+
+And he did so, taking it to his house, and then notifying Barnum
+that it could only be redeemed at cost of a new hat. He knew very
+well that Barnum would rather give him a dozen hats than lose the
+box; and he added that unless he got the hat very soon he would
+give a game dinner on his own account! Barnum sent an order for
+the hat in a hurry, and recovered his game, enjoying the whole
+joke as much as Johnson did.
+
+In 1848, Mr. Frank Leslie, afterward famous as a publisher, came
+to America, bringing letters of introduction to Barnum from
+friends in England, and Barnum gave him a start in business by
+employing him to prepare an elaborate illustrated catalogue of
+the American Museum. This he did in an admirable manner, and
+hundreds of thousands of copies of it were distributed throughout
+the country.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVI. JENNY LIND.
+
+DARING VENTURE--BARNUM'S AMBASSADOR--UNPRECEDENTED TERMS
+OFFERED--TEXT OF THE CONTRACT--HARD WORK TO RAISE THE GUARANTEE
+FUND--EDUCATING THE AMERICAN MIND TO RECEIVE THE FAMOUS SINGER.
+
+The next enterprise undertaken by Barnum was an entirely new
+departure. It was justly regarded by him as bold in its
+conception, complete in its development, and astounding in its
+success. To the end of his days he looked upon it with pride and
+satisfaction. Probably it did more than anything else in all his
+career to give him a permanent and supreme position in the esteem
+of the public.
+
+This enterprise was the bringing of Jenny Lind to America for a
+concert tour.
+
+Miss Lind, often called the "Swedish Nightingale," was one of the
+most remarkable singers of the world, in that or any generation.
+All Europe was enraptured by her art, and her fame had encircled
+the globe. Barnum had never heard her, as she had not visited
+London until a few weeks after his return to America. But her
+reputation was enough to determine him to engage her, if
+possible, for an American tour. So he sent Mr. J. H. Wilton, an
+English musician, who was visiting New York, back to London to
+negotiate terms with her. Barnum agreed to pay Wilton his
+expenses if he had to return without her; but a handsome sum if
+he succeeded in bringing the songstress to America with him. He
+told Wilton to engage her on shares if possible. If not, to
+engage her for any sum up to a thousand dollars a night, for any
+number of nights up to 150, besides paying all her expenses,
+including servants, carriages, etc., and not more than three
+musical assistants. He also offered to secure her by placing the
+whole $150,000 in the hands of her London bankers in advance!
+
+Wilton went to London, had some correspondence with her, and then
+went to Lubeck, where she was singing. She told him frankly that
+she had, since he first wrote to her, been busy making inquiries
+about Barnum's character, trustworthiness, etc., and that she was
+perfectly satisfied with what she had found out. There were,
+however, four other men negotiating with her to the same end. One
+of these gentlemen was a well-known opera manager in London;
+another, a theatrical manager in Manchester; a third, a musical
+composer and conductor of the orchestra of Her Majesty's Opera in
+London; and the fourth, Chevalier Wyckoff, who had conducted a
+successful speculation some years previously by visiting America
+in charge of the celebrated danseuse, Fanny Ellsler.
+
+She also insisted that, under whatever auspices she should go to
+America, she should have as an accompanist Mr.--afterwards
+Sir--Julius Benedict, the composer, and Signor Belletti, an
+eminent Italian singer.
+
+Finally, on January 9, 1850, Wilton succeeded in his mission.
+Miss Lind agreed to come to America under Barnum's management,
+and an elaborate contract was drawn up and signed This historic
+document was as follows:
+
+MEMORANDUM of an agreement entered into this ninth day of
+January, in the year of our Lord one thousand eight hundred and
+fifty, between John Hall Wilton, as agent for PHINEAS T. BARNUM,
+of New York, in the United States of North America, of the one
+part, and Mademoiselle JENNY LIND, Vocalist, of Stockholm, in
+Sweden, of the other part, wherein the said Jenny Lind doth
+agree:
+
+First. To sing for the said Phineas T. Barnum in one hundred and
+fifty concerts, including oratorios within (if possible) one year
+or eighteen months from the date of her arrival in the city of
+New York--the said concerts to be given in the United States of
+North America and Havana. She, the said Jenny Lind, having full
+control as to the number of nights or concerts in each week, and
+the number of pieces in which she will sing in each concert, to
+be regulated conditionally with her health and safety of voice,
+but the former never less than one or two, nor the latter less
+than four; but in no case to appear in operas.
+
+Second. In consideration of said services, the said John Hall
+Wilton, as agent for the said Phineas T. Barnum, of New York,
+agrees to furnish the said Jenny Lind with a servant as
+waiting-maid, and a male servant to and for the sole service of
+her and her party; to pay the travelling and hotel expenses of a
+friend to accompany her as a companion; to pay also a secretary
+to superintend her finances; to pay all her and her party's
+travelling expenses from Europe, and during the tour in the
+United States of North America and Havana; to pay all hotel
+expenses for board and lodging during the same period; to place
+at her disposal in each city a carriage and horses with their
+necessary attendants, and to give her in addition the sum of two
+hundred pounds sterling, or one thousand dollars, for each
+concert or oratorio in which the said Jenny Lind shall sing.
+
+Third. And the said John Hall Wilton, as agent for the said
+Phineas T. Barnum, doth further agree to give the said Jenny Lind
+the most satisfactory security and assurance for the full amount
+of her engagement, which will be placed in the hands of Messrs.
+Baring Brothers, of London, previous to the departure, and
+subject to the order of the said Jenny Lind, with its interest
+due on its current reduction by her services in the concerts or
+oratorios.
+
+Fourth. And the said John Hall Wilton, on the part of the said
+Phineas T. Barnum, further agrees, that should the said Phineas
+T. Barnum, after seventy-five concerts, have realized so much as
+shall, after paying all current expenses, have returned to him
+all the sums disbursed, either as deposits at interest, for
+securities of salaries, preliminary outlay, or moneys in any way
+expended consequent on this engagement, and in addition, have
+gained a clear profit of at least fifteen thousand pounds
+sterling, then the said Phineas T. Barnum will give the said
+Jenny Lind, in addition to the former sum of one thousand dollars
+current money of the United States of North America, nightly,
+one-fifth part of the profits arising from the remaining
+seventy-five concerts or oratorios, after deducting every expense
+current and appertaining thereto; or the said Jenny Lind agrees
+to try, with the said Phineas T. Barnum, fifty concerts or
+oratorios on the aforesaid and first-named terms, and if then
+found to fall short of the expectations of the said Phineas T.
+Barnum, then the said Jenny Lind agrees to reorganize this
+agreement, on terms quoted in his first proposal, as set forth in
+the annexed copy of his letter; but should such be found
+necessary, then the engagement continues up to seventy-five
+concerts or oratorios, at the end of which, should the aforesaid
+profit of fifteen thousand pounds sterling have not been
+realized, then the engagement shall continue as at first--the
+sums herein, after expenses for Julius Benedict and Giovanni
+Belletti, to remain unaltered, except for advancement.
+
+Fifth. And the said John Hall Wilton, agent for the said Phineas
+T. Barnum, at the request of the said Jenny Lind, agrees to pay
+to Julius Benedict, of London, to accompany the said Jenny Lind,
+as musical director, pianist, and superintendent of the musical
+department, also to assist the said Jenny Lind in one hundred and
+fifty concerts or oratorios, to be given in the United States of
+North America and Havana, the sum of five thousand pounds
+(L5,000) sterling, to be satisfactorily secured to him with
+Messrs. Baring Brothers, of London, previous to his departure
+from Europe, and the said John Hall Wilton agrees further, for
+the said Phineas T. Barnum, to pay all his travelling expenses
+from Europe, together with his hotel and travelling expenses
+during the time occupied in giving the aforesaid one hundred and
+fifty concerts or oratorios--he, the said Julius Benedict, to
+superintend the organization of oratorios if required.
+
+Sixth. And the said John Hall Wilton, at the request, selection,
+and for the aid of the said Jenny Lind, agrees to pay to Giovanni
+Belletti, barytone vocalist, to accompany the said Jenny Lind
+during her tour and in one hundred and fifty concerts or
+oratorios in the United States of North America and Havana, and
+in conjunction with the aforesaid Julius Benedict, the sum of two
+thousand five hundred pounds (L2,500) sterling, to be
+satisfactorily secured to him previous to his departure from
+Europe, in addition to all his hotel and travelling expenses.
+
+Seventh. And it is further agreed that the said Jenny Lind shall
+be at full liberty to sing at any time she may think fit for
+charitable institutions, or purposes independent of the
+engagement with the said Phineas T. Barnum, with a view to
+mutually agreeing as to the time and its propriety, it being
+understood that in no case shall the first or second concert in
+any city selected for the tour be for such purpose, or wherever
+it shall appear against the interests of the said Phineas T.
+Barnum.
+
+Eighth. It is further agreed that should the said Jenny Lind, by
+any act of God, be incapacitated to fulfil the entire engagement
+before mentioned, that an equal proportion of the terms agreed
+upon shall be given to the said Jenny Lind, Julius Benedict, and
+Giovanni Belletti, for services rendered to that time.
+
+Ninth. It is further agreed and understood, that the said Phineas
+T. Barnum shall pay every expense appertaining to the concerts or
+oratorios before mentioned, excepting those for charitable
+purposes, and that all accounts shall be settled and rendered by
+all parties weekly.
+
+Tenth. And the said Jenny Lind further agrees that she will not
+engage to sing for any other person during the progress of this
+said engagement with the said Phineas T. Barnum, of New York, for
+one hundred and fifty concerts or oratorios, excepting for
+charitable purposes as before mentioned; and all travelling to be
+first and best class.
+
+In witness hereof to the within written memorandum of agreement
+we set hereunto our hand and seal.
+
+[L. S.]   JOHN HALL WILTON, Agent for Phineas
+
+          T. Barnum, of New York, U. S.
+
+[L. S.]   JENNY LIND.
+
+[T. S.]   JULIUS BENEDICT.
+
+[L. S.]   GIOVANNI BELLETTI.
+
+In the presence of C. ACHILLING, Consul of His Majesty the King
+of Sweden and Norway.
+
+Extract from a letter addressed to John H. Wilton by Phineas T.
+Barnum, and referred to in paragraph No. 4 of the annexed
+agreement:
+
+                    NEW YORK, November 6, 1849.
+
+MR. J. HALL WILTON:
+
+Sir. In reply to your proposal to attempt a negotiation with
+Mlle. Jenny Lind to visit the United States professionally, I
+propose to enter into an arrangement with her to the following
+effect: I will engage to pay all her expenses from Europe,
+provide for and pay for one principal tenor, and one pianist,
+their salaries not exceeding together one hundred and fifty
+dollars per night; to support for her a carriage, two servants,
+and a friend to accompany her and superintend her finances. I
+will furthermore pay all and every expense appertaining to her
+appearance before the public, and give her half of the gross
+receipts arising from concerts or operas. I will engage to travel
+with her personally, and attend to the arrangements, provided she
+will undertake to give not less than eighty, nor more than one
+hundred and fifty concerts, or nights' performances.
+           PHINEAS T. BARNUM.
+
+I certify the above to be a true extract from the letter.
+            J. H. WILTON.
+
+There was no Atlantic cable in those days, and Barnum did not
+know the result of Wilton's embassy until the latter returned to
+America. Barnum was in Philadelphia when Wilton landed in New
+York, on February 19. Wilton at once telegraphed to him that he
+had secured the singer, who was to come over and begin her
+concerts in September. The great showman was startled, and felt
+pretty nervous; and as so long a time was to elapse before she
+came over, he thought it best to keep the whole matter a secret
+for a time.
+
+When we reflect how thoroughly Jenny Lind, her musical powers,
+her character, and wonderful successes, were subsequently known
+by all classes in this country as well as throughout the
+civilized world, it is difficult to realize that, at the time
+this engagement was made, she was comparatively unknown on this
+side the water. We can hardly credit the fact that millions of
+persons in America had never heard of her, that other millions
+had merely read her name, but had no distinct idea of who or what
+she was. Only a small portion of the public were really aware of
+her great musical triumphs in the Old World, and this portion was
+confined almost entirely to musical people, travellers who had
+visited the Old World, and the conductors of the press.
+
+Barnum telegraphed to Wilton to keep the matter secret, and next
+morning set out for New York. But it was too late. When he got to
+New York, he found the news of the engagement in full in all the
+papers. Everybody was talking about it, and wondering who Jenny
+Lind was, and Barnum soon perceived that he must improve the
+time, from then to September, in educating the public up to an
+approximate appreciation of her worth.
+
+His first act was to send, as per agreement, the sum of $187,000
+to Miss Lind's bankers in London. It was not altogether easy for
+him to do this. After he had scraped together all his available
+cash he was still short a large sum. He had plenty of securities
+in the form of second mortgages that were perfectly good, but no
+one in Wall street would lend him a dollar on them.
+
+In his extremity, he at last went to the president of the bank
+where he had transacted his business for the past eight years. "I
+offered him," said Barnum afterward, "as security for a loan, my
+second mortgages, and, as additional security, I offered to make
+over to him my contract with Jenny Lind, with a written guaranty
+that he should appoint a receiver, who, at my expense, should
+take charge of all the receipts over and above $3,000 per night,
+and appropriate them toward the payment of my loan He laughed in
+my face, and said: 'Mr. Barnum, it is generally believed in Wall
+street that your engagement with Jenny Lind will ruin you. I do
+not think you will ever receive so much as $3,000 at a single
+concert.' I was indignant at his want of appreciation, and
+answered him that I would not at that moment take $150,000 for my
+contract; nor would I. I found, upon further inquiry, that it was
+useless in Wall street to offer the 'Nightingale' in exchange for
+'Goldfinches.' I finally was introduced to Mr. John L. Aspinwall,
+of the firm of Messrs. Howland & Aspinwall, and he gave me a
+letter of credit from his firm on Baring Brothers, for a large
+sum on collateral securities, which a spirit of genuine respect
+for my enterprise induced him to accept.
+
+"After disposing of several pieces of property for cash, I footed
+up the various amounts, and still discovered myself $5,000 short.
+I felt that it was indeed the last feather that breaks the
+camel's back.' Happening casually to state my desperate case to
+the Rev. Abel C. Thomas, of Philadelphia, for many years a friend
+of mine, he promptly placed the requisite amount at my disposal.
+I gladly accepted his proffered friendship, and felt that he had
+removed a mountain-weight from my shoulders."
+
+And now nothing remained to do but to arouse public curiosity and
+interest. Barnum was a master-hand at that work, and never did he
+show himself more of a master than on this occasion. He kept the
+press literally teeming with notices in one form or another. Here
+is a sample of the strain in which he wrote:
+
+"Perhaps I may not make any money by this enterprise; but I
+assure you that if I knew I should not make a farthing profit, I
+would ratify the engagement, so anxious am I that the United
+States should be visited by a lady whose vocal powers have never
+been approached by any other human being, and whose character is
+charity, simplicity, and goodness personified.
+
+"Miss Lind has great anxiety to visit America. She speaks of this
+country and its institutions in the highest terms of praise. In
+her engagement with me (which includes Havana), she expressly
+reserves the right to give charitable concerts whenever she
+thinks proper.
+
+Since her debut in England, she has given to the poor from her
+own private purse more than the whole amount which I have engaged
+to pay her, and the proceeds of concerts for charitable purposes
+in Great Britain, where she has sung gratuitously, have realized
+more than ten times that amount."
+
+And so it came to pass that, before September rolled around,
+curiosity, interest and enthusiasm over the great singer were at
+fever heat, and New York thought and dreamed only of her coming.
+
+Never, in the history of music or in the history of
+entertainments in America, has the advent of a foreign artist
+been hailed with so much enthusiasm.
+
+A large share of this public interest was natural and genuine,
+and would, in any event, have been accorded to Miss Lind. But a
+considerable portion of it was due to the shrewd and energetic
+advertising of Mr. Barnum. Under any auspices the great singer's
+tour in America would have been successful; but under no other
+management would it have approximated to what it was under
+Barnum.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVII. ARRIVAL OF JENNY LIND.
+
+FIRST MEETING WITH BARNUM--RECEPTION IN NEW YORK--POEMS IN HER
+HONOR--A FURORE OF PUBLIC INTEREST--SALE OF TICKETS FOR THE FIRST
+CONCERT--BARNUM'S CHANGE IN TERMS--TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS FOR
+CHARITY--ENORMOUS SUCCESS OF THE FIRST CONCERT.
+
+Jenny Lind sailed for America on Wednesday morning, August 21,
+1850. She was accompanied by Messrs. Benedict and Belletti, Mr.
+Wilton, her two cousins, and three or four servants. She also
+brought with her a piano for her use. Mr. Barnum had engaged the
+necessary accommodations for the company on the steamship
+Atlantic, and their departure from England was an event of great
+public interest. In America their coming was looked upon much as
+the visit of a royal personage would have been. It was expected
+that the steamer would reach New York on Sunday, September 1st.
+Mr. Barnum, however, determined to be on hand to meet his
+distinguished guest at no matter what time she reached the port.
+He, therefore, went on Saturday to Staten Island, and spent the
+night at the house of his friend, Dr. Doane, the health officer
+of the port.
+
+The steamship was sighted just before noon on Sunday, and soon
+afterward Mr. Barnum, who went out with the health officer, was
+standing on the deck where, for the first time, he met the famous
+singer. After they had shaken hands and uttered a few commonplace
+words of greeting Miss Lind asked him when and where he had heard
+her sing.
+
+"I never had the pleasure of seeing you before in my life," he
+replied.
+
+"How is it possible that you dared risk so much money on a person
+whom you never heard sing?" she asked in great surprise.
+
+"I risked it," answered Barnum, "on your reputation, which in
+musical matters I would much rather trust than my own judgment."
+
+The fact was that, although Barnum did rely largely upon Miss
+Lind's reputation as an artist, he also took into account her
+equally great reputation for benevolence, generosity and general
+loveliness of disposition. He knew that these traits of character
+would appeal with a special force to the warm-hearted and
+enthusiastic American public. Indeed, he afterward confessed that
+had it not been for this peculiarity of her disposition, he never
+would have ventured to make the engagement with her; and he
+always believed that as many people came to see and hear her on
+this account as on account of her skill as a singer.
+
+Seldom has any visitor to New York received a more remarkable
+greeting than did the "Swedish Nightingale." Mr. Barnum's efforts
+to arouse public interest in her had not been in vain. The whole
+city was anxious to get the first possible glimpse of her. But
+beside this bona fide interest in her, Mr. Barnum had seen to it
+that her landing was made all possible use of as an
+advertisement. On the wharf at which she landed a bower of green
+trees, decorated with flags, had been prepared. There were also
+two handsome triumphal arches, on one of which was inscribed,
+"Welcome, Jenny Lind!" and on the other, "Welcome to America!"
+
+Probably the singer thought, and possibly some of the general
+public also imagined, that these decorations had been erected by
+the city government, or at least by some committee of
+public-spirited citizens. Mr. Barnum, however, never found fault
+with any one for suspecting that he was chiefly responsible for
+them, and there is every reason to believe that the cost of them
+was to be found entered in his books, charged to the account of
+advertising.
+
+Thousands of people were thronged along the water front, on the
+piers and on the shipping, to greet the Atlantic as it reached
+its dock. So great was the rush to see the illustrious guest that
+one man was crowded overboard, an incident which Miss Lind
+herself witnessed, and at which she was much alarmed. He was
+rescued with no other harm than a thorough wetting. Barnum's
+carriage was in waiting for Miss Lind, and the great showman
+himself, after placing her within it, mounted the box at the
+driver's side. He took that seat as a legitimate advertisement,
+and his presence there aided those who filled the windows and
+sidewalks along the entire way to the Irving House, and there
+were many thousands of them, in coming to the conclusion that
+Jenny Lind had really arrived.
+
+Five minutes after Miss Lind had entered the hotel, Barnum
+invited her to look out of a window opening on Broadway. When she
+did so she saw a throng of not less than twenty thousand persons
+gathered to do her honor. And there that throng remained all the
+rest of the afternoon and until late in the evening. At her
+request Barnum took dinner with her that afternoon. According to
+the European custom she offered to pledge his health in a glass
+of wine, and was doubtless much surprised at his response. He
+said to her: "Miss Lind, I do not think you can ask any other
+favor on earth which I would not gladly grant. But I am a
+teetotaler, and must beg to be permitted to drink to your health
+and happiness in a glass of cold water."
+
+Late that night Miss Lind was serenaded by the New York Musical
+Fund Society, which numbered, on that occasion, two hundred
+musicians. They were escorted to the hotel by about three hundred
+firemen, clad in their picturesque uniform and bearing flaming
+torches. Fully thirty thousand spectators were at this hour
+gathered about the hotel, and in response to their vociferous
+calls Miss Lind stepped upon the balcony and bowed to them.
+
+Such was the great singer's first day in America, and for several
+weeks thereafter the public interest in her was scarcely less
+demonstrative. Her rooms were thronged by visitors, among whom
+were the most notable people in society, in the learned
+professions and in public life. The street before the hotel was
+almost blocked day after day by the carriages of fashionable
+people, and Barnum's only anxiety was lest the aristocratic part
+of the community should monopolize her altogether, and thus mar
+his interest by cutting her off from the sympathy she had excited
+among the common people. The shop-keepers of the city showered
+their attentions upon her, sending her cart-loads of specimens of
+their most valuable wares, for which they asked no other return
+than her acceptance and her autograph acknowledgment. Gloves,
+bonnets, shawls, gowns, chairs, carriages, pianos, and almost
+every imaginable article of use or ornament was named for her.
+Songs and musical compositions were dedicated to her, and poems
+were published in her honor. Day after day and week after week
+her doings formed the most conspicuous news in the daily
+journals.
+
+Some weeks before Miss Lind's arrival in America Barnum had
+offered a prize of two hundred dollars for the best ode, to be
+set to music and sung by her at her first concert. Its topic was
+to be, "Greeting to America." In response several hundred poems
+were sent in, mostly pretty poor stuff; though several of them
+were very good. After a great deal of hard work in reading and
+considering them, the Prize Committee selected as the best the
+one offered by Bayard Taylor. It was set to music by Julius
+Benedict, and was as follows:
+
+GREETING TO AMERICA
+
+WORDS BY BAYARD TAYLOR--MUSIC BY JULIUS BENEDICT.
+
+ I greet with a full heart the Land of the West,
+     Whose Banner of Stars o'er a world is unrolled;
+ Whose empire o'ershadows Atlantic's wide breast,
+     And opens to sunset its gateway of gold!
+ The land of the mountain, the land of the lake,
+     And rivers that roll in magnificent tide--
+ Where the souls of the mighty from slumber awake,
+     And hallow the soil for whose freedom they died!
+
+ Thou Cradle of empire! though wide be the foam
+     That severs the land of my fathers and thee,
+ I hear, from thy bosom, the welcome of home,
+     For song has a home in the hearts of the Free!
+ And long as thy waters shall gleam in the sun,
+     And long as thy heroes remember their scars,
+ Be the hands of thy children united as one,
+     And Peace shed her light on thy Banner of Stars!
+
+ This award gave general satisfaction, although a few
+disappointed competitors complained. This remarkable competition
+and the other features of Miss Lind's reception in America,
+attracted so much attention in England that the London Times in
+one day devoted several columns of space to the subject.
+
+Of course the American press literally teemed with matter about
+Miss Lind and Barnum. The poetical competition demanded much
+attention, and presently a witty pamphlet was published, entitled
+"Barnum's Parnassus; being Confidential Disclosures of the Prize
+Committee on the Jenny Lind Song." It pretended to give all or
+most of the poems that had been offered in the competition,
+though of course none of them were genuine. Many of them,
+however, contained fine satirical hits on the whole business;
+such, for example, as the following:
+
+BARNUMOPSIS.
+
+A RECITATIVE.
+
+ When to the common rest that crowns his days,
+     Dusty and worn the tired pedestrian goes,
+ What light is that whose wide o'erlooking blaze
+     A sudden glory on his pathway throws?
+
+ 'Tis not the setting sun, whose drooping lid
+     Closed on the weary world at half-past six;
+ 'Tis not the rising moon, whose rays are hid
+     Behind the city's sombre piles of bricks.
+
+  It is the Drummond Light, that from the top
+     Of Barnum's massive pile, sky-mingling there,
+ Dart's its quick gleam o'er every shadowed shop,
+     And gilds Broadway with unaccustomed glare.
+
+  There o'er the sordid gloom, whose deep'ning tracks
+     Furrow the city's brow, the front of ages,
+ Thy loftier light descends on cabs and hacks,
+     And on two dozen different lines of stages!
+
+ O twilight Sun, with thy far darting ray,
+     Thou art a type of him whose tireless hands
+ Hung thee on high to guide the stranger's way,
+     Where, in its pride, his vast Museum stands.
+
+ Him, who in search of wonders new and strange,
+     Grasps the wide skirts of Nature's mystic robe
+ Explores the circles of eternal change,
+     And the dark chambers of the central globe.
+
+ He, from the reedy shores of fabled Nile,
+     Has brought, thick-ribbed and ancient as old iron,
+ That venerable beast, the crocodile,
+     And many a skin of many a famous lion.
+
+  Go lose thyself in those continuous halls,
+     Where strays the fond papa with son and daughter;
+ And all that charms or startles or appals,
+     Thou shalt behold, and for a single quarter.
+
+  Far from the Barcan deserts now withdrawn,
+     There, huge constrictors coil their scaly backs;
+ There, cased in glass, malignant and unshorn,
+     Old murderers glare in sullenness and wax.
+
+  There many a varied form the sight beguiles,
+     In rusty broadcloth decked and shocking hat,
+ And there the unwieldy Lambert sits and smiles,
+     In the majestic plenitude of fat.
+
+ Or for thy gayer hours, the orang-outang
+     Or ape salutes thee with his strange grimace,
+ And in their shapes, stuffed as on earth they sprang,
+     Thine individual being thou canst trace!
+
+  And joys the youth in life's green spring, who goes
+     With the sweet babe and the gray headed nurse,
+ To see those Cosmoramic orbs disclose
+     The varied beauties of the universe.
+
+ And last, not least, the marvellous Ethiope,
+     Changing his skin by preternatural skill,
+ Whom every setting sun's diurnal slope
+     Leaves whiter than the last, and whitening still.
+
+  All that of monstrous, scaly, strange and queer,
+     Has come from out the womb of earliest time,
+ Thou hast, O Barnum, in thy keeping here,
+     Nor is this all--for triumphs more sublime
+
+  Await thee yet! I, Jenny Lind, who reigned
+     Sublimely throned, the imperial queen of song,
+ Wooed by thy golden harmonies, have deigned
+     Captive to join the heterogeneous throng.
+
+  Sustained by an unfaltering trust in coin,
+     Dealt from thy hand, O thou illustrious man,
+ Gladly I heard the summons come to join
+     Myself the immeasurable caravan.
+
+A number of complimentary greetings in verse were also sent in to
+Miss Lind by various writers of more or less eminence, among them
+being the following from Mrs. Lydia H. Sigourney:
+
+THE SWEDISH SONGSTRESS AND HER CHARITIES.
+
+BY MRS. L. H. SIGOURNEY.
+
+ Blest must their vocation be
+ Who, with tones of melody,
+ Charm the discord and the strife
+ And the railroad rush of life,
+
+ And with Orphean magic move
+ Souls inert to life and love.
+ But there's one who doth inherit
+ Angel gift and angel spirit,
+ Bidding tides of gladness flow
+ Through the realms of want and woe;
+ 'Mid lone age and misery's lot,
+ Kindling pleasures long forgot,
+ Seeking minds oppressed with night,
+ And on darkness shedding light,
+ She the seraph's speech doth know,
+ She hath done their deeds below;
+ So, when o'er this misty strand
+ She shall clasp their waiting hand,
+ They will fold her to their breast,
+ More a sister than a guest.
+
+ The first concert was announced for the evening of September
+11th, and it was to take place in the great hall of Castle
+Garden, afterward famous as the landing-place for emigrants at
+New York. The tickets for this occasion were sold at auction, and
+the first one was bid up to the extraordinary figure of $225.
+This was bid and the ticket was secured by John N. Genin, a
+hatter; and the public notice which was thereby attracted to him
+was such a great advertisement for his business that within a few
+years thereafter he amassed a fortune. It was afterward stated
+that Mr. Genin was Barnum's brother-in-law, and that his high bid
+for this ticket was a pre-arranged job; but there was no truth in
+this whatever. The auction itself was regarded as an occasion of
+such public interest that the proprietors of the Garden, where it
+was held, charged a shilling admission fee to it. No less than
+3,000 persons paid this fee and attended the auction, and the
+first day's sale aggregated 1,000 tickets, which brought a total
+sum of $10,141.
+
+A few days after her arrival Barnum told Miss Lind that it would
+be desirable to make a change in the terms of their contract, if
+she would consent. She was startled at this, and asked him what
+the change was to be. "I am convinced," replied Barnum, "that
+this enterprise will be far more successful than either of us
+anticipated. So I wish to stipulate that you shall receive not
+only $1,000 for each concert, beside all expenses, but also that,
+after taking out $5,500 per night for expenses and for my
+services, the balance shall be equally divided between you and
+me."
+
+She looked at him in utter bewilderment, unable to understand his
+proposition. He repeated it, and at last made her realize what it
+was that he proposed to do. Then she grasped him by the hand and
+exclaimed: "Mr. Barnum, you are a gentleman of honor; you are
+generous; it is just as I was told. I will sing for you as long
+as you please. I will sing for you in America--in
+Europe--anywhere!"
+
+The day before the first concert Mr. Barnum told Miss Lind that,
+judging by appearances, her portion of the proceeds of the first
+concert, over and above her fee of $1,000, would amount to at
+least $10,000. She immediately resolved to devote every dollar of
+it to charity, and forthwith sent for the Mayor of the city,
+under whose advice she acted in selecting the various
+institutions among which it was to be distributed.
+
+The amount of money actually received for tickets for the first
+concert was $17,864.05. So it appeared that Barnum's estimate had
+been a little too high, and Miss Lind's portion was too small to
+realize the $10,000 which she was to give to charity. Barnum
+therefore proposed to make a similar arrangement for the second
+concert, and to count neither of these first two in the regular
+engagement. To this she agreed. The second concert was given on
+September 13th, and the receipts, which amounted to $14,203.03,
+were disposed of as before, and she was thus enabled to give the
+$10,000 to charity. The third concert, which was the first of the
+regular series, was given on September 17th.
+
+Barnum's arrangements of the concert-room for the singer's
+appearance were very complete. One hundred ushers, adorned with
+rosettes and carrying wands tipped with ribbons, looked after the
+seating of the audience. In order to prevent confusion the doors
+were opened at five o'clock, although the concert was not to
+commence until eight. The result was that the five thousand
+persons who attended made their entry without crowding and
+without confusion.
+
+The reception of Jenny Lind, on her first appearance, in point of
+enthusiasm, was probably never before equalled. As Mr. Benedict
+led her towards the footlights, the entire audience rose to their
+feet and welcomed her with three cheers, accompanied by the
+waving of thousands of hats and handkerchiefs. This was perhaps
+the largest audience to which Jenny Lind had ever sung. She was
+evidently much agitated, but the orchestra commenced, and before
+she had sung a dozen notes of "Casta Diva," she began to recover
+her self-possession, and long before the scena was concluded she
+was as calm as if she was in her own drawing-room. Towards the
+last portion of the cavatina, the audience were so completely
+carried away by their feelings, that the remainder of the air was
+drowned in a perfect tempest of acclamation. Enthusiasm had been
+wrought to its highest pitch, but the musical powers of Jenny
+Lind exceeded all the brilliant anticipations which had been
+formed, and her triumph was complete. At the conclusion of the
+concert Jenny Lind was loudly called for, and was obliged to
+appear three times before the audience could be satisfied. Then
+they called vociferously for "Barnum," and he "reluctantly"
+responded to their demand.
+
+On this first night Julius Benedict firmly established with the
+American people his European reputation as a most accomplished
+conductor and musical composer; while Signor Belletti inspired an
+admiration which grew warmer and deeper in the minds of the
+public, to the end of his career in this country.
+
+"The Rubicon was passed," says Barnum. "The successful issue of
+the Jenny Lind enterprise was established. I think there were a
+hundred men in New York, the day after her first concert, who
+would have willingly paid me $200,000 for my contract. I received
+repeated offers for an eighth, a tenth, or a sixteenth,
+equivalent to that price. But mine had been the risk, and I was
+determined mine should be the triumph."
+
+The triumph of Jenny Lind is a legitimate part of Barnum's
+history, and it will be of interest to the present generation to
+read what the musical critics of that day thought of that
+wonderful singer. Here is the New York Tribune's account of her
+opening concerts in America:
+
+"Jenny Lind's first concert is over, and all doubts are at an
+end. She is the greatest singer we have ever heard and her
+success is all that was anticipated from her genius and her fame.
+As this is something of an era in our history of art, we give a
+detailed account of all that took place on the occasion.
+
+"All the preparatory arrangements for the concert were made with
+great care, and from the admirable system observed, none of the
+usual disagreeable features of such an event were experienced.
+Outside of the gate there was a double row of policemen extending
+up the main avenue of the Battery grounds. Carriages only were
+permitted to drive up to the gate from the Whitehall side, and
+pass off into Battery-place. At one time the line of carriages
+extended to Whitehall and up State street into Broadway.
+Everything was accomplished in a quiet and orderly manner. The
+chief of police, with about sixty men, came on the ground at 5
+o'clock, and maintained the most complete order to the end.
+
+"Mr. Barnum, according to promise, had put up a substantial
+frame-work, and thrown an immense awning over the bridge, which
+is some 200 feet in length. This was brilliantly lighted, and had
+almost the appearance of a triumphal avenue on entering the gate.
+
+"There was an immense crowd on the Battery, clustering around the
+gates during the whole evening, but no acts of disorder occurred.
+When Jenny Lind's carriage came, but very few persons knew it,
+and no great excitement followed. The principal annoyance was
+occasioned by a noisy crowd of boys in boats, who gathered around
+the outer wall of the castle, and being by their position secure
+from the police, tried to disturb those within by a hideous
+clamor of shouts and yells, accompanied by a discordant din of
+drums and fifes. There must have been more than 200 boats and a
+thousand persons on the water. They caused some annoyance to that
+portion of the audience in the back seats of the balcony, but the
+nuisance was felt by none in the parquet. By 10 o'clock they had
+either become tired or ashamed of the contemptible outrage they
+were attempting, and dispersed. We may here remark that if the
+river police asked for by Chief Matsell had been in existence
+this attempt could not have been made.
+
+"On entering the castle, a company of ushers, distinguished by
+their badges, were in readiness to direct the visitors to that
+part of the hall where their seats were located. Colored lamps
+and hangings suspended to the pillars indicated at a glance the
+different divisions, and the task of seating the whole audience
+of near seven thousand persons was thus accomplished without the
+least inconvenience. The hall was brilliantly lighted, though
+from its vast extent the stage looked somewhat dim. The wooden
+partition which was built up in place of the drop-curtain, is
+covered with a painting representing the combined standards of
+America and Sweden, below which are arabesque ornaments in white
+and gold. Considering the short time allowed for these
+improvements, the change was remarkable. The only instance of bad
+taste which we noticed was a large motto, worked in flowers,
+suspended over the pillars of the balcony directly in front of
+the stage. 'Welcome, Sweet Warbler' (so ran the words), was not
+only tame and commonplace, but decidedly out of place.
+
+"The sight of the grand hall, with its gay decoration, its
+glittering lamps, and its vast throng of expectant auditors, was
+in itself almost worth a $5 ticket. We were surprised to notice
+that not more than one-eighth of the audience were ladies. They
+must stay at home, it seems, when the tickets are high, but the
+gentlemen go, nevertheless. For its size, the audience was one of
+the most quiet, refined and appreciative we ever saw assembled in
+this city. Not more than one-third were seated before 7 o'clock,
+and when the eventful hour arrived they were still coming in. A
+few of the seats were not taken when the orchestra had assembled,
+and Mr. Benedict, who was greeted with loud cheers on his
+appearance, gave the first flourish of his baton.
+
+"The musical performance commenced with Jules Benedict's overture
+to his opera, The Crusaders, himself conducting the orchestra of
+60 instruments. It was an admirably balanced and effective
+orchestra, and notwithstanding that we had to listen as it were
+round a corner, we felt the unity and full force of its strong
+chords, and traced the precise and delicate outline of its
+melodies with a distinctness which proved that a clear musical
+idea was there, too clearly embodied to be lost even in that vast
+space. We liked the first half of the composition best; it had
+the dark shading and wild vigor and pathos of Von Weber; the
+allegro which set in upon it was more in the light popular manner
+of Auber and the French. Yet Mr. Benedict has proved his mastery
+in this work, which the vast audience acknowledged with very
+hearty plaudits.
+
+"Signor Belletti was the next mark of expectation. In one of
+Rossini's most ornate and florid bravura songs (from Maometto
+Secondo) he produced a barytone of such warm, rich, solid,
+resonant and feeling quality as we perhaps have never heard in
+this country (though without closer observation from the less
+remote position in which a barytone naturally requires to be
+heard, we hardly dare to place it above Badiali's); while in
+refinement of conception and of execution he left little to be
+desired.
+
+"Now came a moment of breathless expectation. A moment more, and
+Jenny Lind, clad in a white dress, which well became the frank
+sincerity of her face, came forward through the orchestra. It is
+impossible to describe the spontaneous burst of welcome which
+greeted her. The vast assembly rose as one man, and for some
+minutes nothing could be seen but the waving of hands and
+handkerchiefs, nothing heard but a storm of tumultuous cheers.
+The enthusiasm of the moment, for a time beyond all bounds, was
+at last subdued after prolonging itself by its own fruitless
+efforts to subdue itself, and the divine songstress, with that
+perfect bearing, that air of all dignity and sweetness, blending
+a child-like simplicity and half-trembling womanly modesty with
+the beautiful confidence of genius and serene wisdom of art,
+addressed herself to song, as the orchestral symphony prepared
+the way for the voice in Casta Diva. A better test-piece could
+not have been selected for her debut. Every soprano lady has sung
+it to us; but nearly every one has seemed only trying to make
+something of it, while Jenny Lind WAS the very music of it for
+the time being. We would say no less than that; for the wisest
+and honestest part of criticism on such a first hearing of a
+thing so perfect, was to give itself purely up to it, without
+question, and attempt no analysis of what too truly fills one to
+have yet begun to be an object of thought.
+
+"If it were possible, we would describe the quality of that
+voice, so pure, so sweet, so fine, so whole and all-pervading, in
+its lowest breathings and minutest fioriture as well as in its
+strongest volume. We never heard tones which in their sweetness
+went so far. They brought the most distant and ill-seated auditor
+close to her. They WERE tones, every one of them, and the whole
+air had to take the law of their vibrations. The voice and the
+delivery had in them all the good qualities of all the good
+singers. Song in her has that integral beauty which at once
+proclaims it as a type for all, and is most naturally worshipped
+as such by the multitude.
+
+"Of those who have been before her we were most frequently
+reminded of Madame Bishop's quality (not quantity) of voice.
+Their voices are of metal somewhat akin. Jenny Lind's had
+incomparably more power and more at all times in reserve; but it
+had a shade of that same veiled quality in its lowest tones,
+consistently with the same (but much more) ripeness and
+sweetness, and perfect freedom from the crudeness often called
+clearness, as they rise. There is the same kind of versatile and
+subtile talent, too, in Jenny Lind, as appeared later in the
+equal inspiration and perfection of her various characters and
+styles of song. Her's is a genuine soprano, reaching the extra
+high notes with that ease and certainty which make each highest
+one a triumph of expression purely, and not a physical marvel.
+The gradual growth and sostenuto of her tones; the light and
+shade, the rhythmic undulation and balance of her passages; the
+bird-like ecstacy of her trill; the faultless precision and
+fluency of her chromatic scales; above all, the sure reservation
+of such volume of voice as to crown each protracted climax with
+glory, not needing a new effort to raise force for the final
+blow; and indeed all the points one looks for in a mistress of
+the vocal art were eminently her's in Casta Diva. But the charm
+lay not in any POINT, but rather in the inspired vitality, the
+hearty, genuine outpouring of the whole--the real and yet truly
+ideal humanity of all her singing. That is what has won the world
+to Jenny Lind; it is that her whole soul and being goes out in
+her song, and that her voice becomes the impersonation of that
+song's soul if it have any, that is, if it BE a song. There is
+plainly no vanity in her, no mere aim to effect; it is all frank
+and real and harmoniously earnest.
+
+"She next bewitched all by the delicate naivete and sparkling
+espieglerie, interchanged with true love pathos, of her duet with
+Belletti, from Rossini's I Turchi in Italia, the music being in
+the same voice with that of his 'Barber of Seville.' The distinct
+rapidity, without hurry, of many passages, was remarkable in both
+performers. But perhaps the most wonderful exhibition of her
+vocal skill and pliancy and of her active intimacy with nature
+was in the Trio Concertante, with two flutes, from Meyerbeer's
+'Camp of Silesia.' Exquisitely her voice played in echo between
+the tasteful flute-warblings of Messrs. Kyle and Siede.
+
+"But do not talk of her flute-like voice; the flute-tone is not
+one a real voice need cultivate; except where it silvers the
+edges of a dark mass of orchestral harmony, the flute's
+unmitigated sweetness must and should contrast with the more
+clarionet and reed-like quality of a voice as rich and human as
+that of Jenny Lind.
+
+"Naturally the favorites of the evening were the two national
+songs. Her Swedish 'Herdsman's Song' was singularly quaint, wild
+and innocent. The odd musical interval (a sharp seventh) of the
+the echo, as if her singing had brought the very mountains there,
+were extremely characteristic. This was loudly encored and
+repeated; and when again encored was of course answered with her
+'Greeting to America,' the National Prize Song, written by Bayard
+Taylor, and set to a vigorous and familiar style of music, well
+harmonizing with the words, by Benedict. The greeting had a soul
+in it coming from those lips.
+
+"We have but now to acknowledge the fine style of Belletti's
+Largo al Factotum (though the gay barber's song always requires
+the stage) and the admirable orchestra performance of Weber's
+Overture to Oberon.
+
+"We are now sure of Jenny Lind, the singer and the artist. Last
+night she was herself, and well accompanied, and gloriously
+responded to. But we have yet to hear her in the kind of music
+which seems to us most to need and to deserve such a singer--in
+the Agatha of Der Freyschutz, and in Mozart and the deep music of
+the great modern German operas.
+
+"At the close the audience (who made no movement to leave till
+the last note had been uttered) broke out in a tempest of cheers,
+only less vehement than those which welcomed her in Casta Diva.
+She came forward again, bowed with a bright, grateful face, and
+retired. The cheers were now mingled with shouts of 'Barnum!' who
+at last came forward, and with some difficulty obtained
+sufficient order to speak. 'My friends,' said he, 'you have often
+heard it asked, 'Where's Barnum?" Amid the cheers and laughter
+which followed, we only caught the words: 'Henceforth, you may
+say, 'Barnum's nowhere!' '
+
+"Mr. Barnum, after expressing his gratification at the splendid
+welcome which had been given Mdlle. Lind, stated that he would
+disclose a piece of news which he could no longer keep secret,
+and which would show how well that welcome was deserved. Mdlle.
+Lind on Monday morning informed him that it was her intention to
+give her share of the net proceeds of the present concert,
+amounting to considerable more than $10,000, to the various
+charities in the city.
+
+"The announcement was a signal for another storm. We did not
+count the number of cheers given, but we never witnessed such a
+pitch of enthusiasm. Mr. Barnum then proceeded to read the list
+of her donations, interrupted at every name by a fresh burst of
+applause:
+
+ To the Fire Department Fund . . . . . . . . . $3,000
+
+     Musical Fund Society. . . . . . . . . . . .2,000
+
+     Home for the Friendless . . . . . . . . . . .500
+
+     Society for the Relief of Indigent Females. .500
+
+     Dramatic Fund Association . . . . . . . . . .500
+
+     Home for Colored and Aged Persons . . . . . .500
+
+     Colored and Orphan Association. . . . . . . .500
+
+     Lying-in Asylum for Destitute Females . . . .500
+
+     New York Orphan Asylum. . . . . . . . . . . .500
+
+     Protestant Half-Orphan Asylum . . . . . . . .500
+
+     Roman Catholic Half-Orphan Asylum . . . . . .500
+
+     Old Ladies' Asylum. . . . . . . . . . . . . .500
+
+               Total . . . . . . . . . . . . .$10,000
+
+
+
+"In case the money coming to her shall exceed this sum, she will
+hereafter designate the charity to which it is to be
+appropriated. Mr. Barnum was then about retiring, when there was
+a universal call for Jenny Lind. The songstress, however, had
+already taken her departure, and the excited crowd, after giving
+a few more cheers, followed her example, and slowly surged out of
+the castle door, and down the canopied bridge, in a glow of
+good-humor and admiration. A few disorderly vagrants collected on
+the bridges leading to the Bath Houses, hooted at the throng as
+it passed out, but everybody went home quietly, with a new joy at
+his heart, and a new thought in his brain.
+
+"Jenny Lind's second concert was in every respect as complete a
+triumph as the first. The audience numbered upward of SEVEN
+THOUSAND, filling the vast amphitheatre to the topmost circles of
+the gallery. The sight of that dense sea of heads, from either
+extremity of the balcony, reminded us of one of Martin's grand,
+gloomy pictures, and the resemblance was further increased by the
+semi-oriental appearance of the hall, with its long, light
+pillars dropping from the centre, as well as by the dimness of
+its illumination, the lamps, many and bright as they were, being
+lost in the immense area of the building.
+
+"The concert was a repetition of the first, with the only
+difference that the orchestra volunteered the "Wedding March,"
+from Mendelssohn's "Midsummer Night's Dream," whose short,
+crackling blaze of harmony received full justice from the sure
+and well-tempered brass instruments. Weber's overture to "Oberon"
+was finely rendered, and the composition is as fine a specimen of
+musical fairy-land as could be found before young Mendelssohn
+dreamed Shakspere's dream over in his own way.
+
+"In Jenny Lind we still feel that it is not easy to separate the
+singer from the person. She sings herself. She does not, like
+many skilful vocalists, merely recite her musical studies, and
+dazzle you with splendid feats unnaturally acquired; her singing,
+through all her versatile range of parts and styles, is her own
+proper and spontaneous activity--integral, and whole. Her
+magnificent voice, always true and firm, and as far beyond any
+instrument as humanity is beyond nature, seems like the audible
+beauty of her nature and her character. That she is an artist in
+the highest sense is a question long since settled, and any
+little incidental variation from the bold and perfect outline of
+success in any special effort, as the faltering of her voice from
+natural embarrassment in the commencing of Casta Diva that first
+night, could not to a true listener at all impede the recognition
+of the wonderful art which could afford a little to humanity on
+so trying an occasion. For she was as it were beginning her
+career anew; literally to her was this a new world; and she felt
+for a moment as if in her first blushing maidenhood of song. This
+second time the hesitation of the voice in that commencement was
+not felt. The note began soft and timid and scarce audible, as
+the prayer of Norma might have done; but how it gradually swelled
+with the influx of divine strength into the soul! The grand
+difficulty in the opening andante movement of Casta Diva lies in
+its broad, sustained phrasing, in the long, generous undulation
+of its rhythm, which with most singers drags or gets broken out
+of symmetry. Jenny Lind conceived and did it truly. The
+impassioned energy of the loud-pleading syncopated cries in which
+the passage attains its climax; the celestial purity and
+penetrating sweetness of that highest note afterward; the
+exquisite cadenza to the andante; and the inspiring eloquence of
+the allegro: Ah! bello a me ritorna, were far beyond anything WE
+have had the fortune hitherto to hear.
+
+"They that sat, or even stood, in Castle Garden, may mark down a
+white day in their calendar. In point of audience, programme,
+execution and inspiration, it was the greatest concert, so far.
+If anything more had been needed to confirm the impression which
+Jenny Lind had previously made on an American public, and to
+place her continued success beyond the possibility of doubt, last
+night's experience certainly supplied it.
+
+"It was foreseen in the morning that the attendance would be
+greater even than on Friday night. The American Museum and Hall's
+Music Store were besieged through the whole day and up to the
+very hour of commencement. At the former place the crowding for
+tickets was tremendous, the very sidewalk in front being
+blockaded most of the time. At seven o'clock, when we took up the
+line of march for Castle Garden, both sides of Broadway were
+thronged, and the main avenue of the Battery was filled with a
+steady stream of persons pressing into the Castle gate. As on the
+first night, a double line of policemen had been formed, which
+effectually prevented all disorder. A few more lamps were
+introduced into the hall, rendering its aspect much more light
+and cheerful. By eight o'clock the vast hall was crowded to
+overflowing. Scarcely a foot of space was unoccupied; from the
+very edge of the ceiling to the orchestral platform in the
+centre, around the immense span of the building, there was but
+one dense mass of heads. We should, at a rough guess, estimate
+the number in the auditory at SEVEN THOUSAND. A much larger
+proportion than on former nights were ladies, and for the first
+time we caught glimpses of the fashionable society from above
+Bleecker. It is worthy of note, that the first and second
+concerts, immense as they were, were composed almost entirely of
+the intelligent and appreciative middle class.
+
+"Some disturbance was created by a rush to obtain seats, made by
+those who had promenade tickets for the balcony, the moment the
+orchestra began to collect. This proceeding, in violation of the
+specified arrangements, was most disgraceful. The ushers did all
+they could to prevent it, but in spite of all their efforts many
+persons who arrived before the hour of commencement were deprived
+of their seats. It would be a good plan to have a few policemen
+in the balcony on future occasions.
+
+"The orchestra commenced with Rossini's Overture to "William
+Tell"--perhaps the finest piece of instrumental picture music
+since Haydn's Creation and the Pastoral Symphony of Beethoven.
+Its fresh and vivid coloring, its atmospheric changes, its smart
+Alpine vigor and heroic ensemble, were made as present and as
+real as any sixty instruments could make them. Exquisitely did
+those three violoncellos sketch the first scene of soft, cool
+sunset on the unruffled lake; the mellow Corno Anglaise, male
+partner to the oboe, sweetly woke the flute-like mountain echoes;
+the low moan and whistle of the storm rose life like in the
+crescendo of the violins, and as it died away the startling
+quick-step of liberty leaped strong and simultaneous from such a
+tutti as we have hardly heard from any orchestra. We can believe
+that Mr. Benedict was quite sincere in telling them he had not
+conducted a better orchestra in Europe. The other Overture to
+Masaniello was also splendidly played, but the composition is, to
+our taste, too hackneyed to fill out the programme of a Jenny
+Lind before the largest audience in the world. The accompaniments
+to the singing were usually given with sympathetic precision, and
+subdued shading or vigorous seconding, as the case required. We
+cannot speak too well of M. Benedict's control of his forces.
+
+"The second piece was the Viravviso ("As I View Now") from La
+Somnambula, delivered in the richest and most vibrating barytone
+that WE Americans have heard, by Sig. Belletti. Now that we have
+heard him from a nearer position, we have not a doubt left of his
+superiority in voice, style, execution to all our Italian
+favorites of the same register hitherto. He absolutely glorified
+the cavatina which rapidly grew commonplace with Brough, and had
+but half recovered even in the hands of the worthy Italian
+artists who have since sung it on the stage for us. His crowning
+achievement last night, however, was the actual singing of a
+Tarentella by Rossini--a kind of movement which we have hitherto
+heard only from instruments--a whirling, spinning, delirious,
+top-like movement in which the singer seems galvanized and
+tyrannized by one too happy and all-mastering idea in spite of
+himself. The audience too, in spite of themselves, were sucked
+into its whirling ecstacy, and it was imperatively encored. In
+Mozart's Non piu Andrai the chaster prototype of Rossini's Largo
+al factotum, his vocalization was elastic, spirited and elegant,
+but the effect of such a piece was necessarily lost upon the
+outer circles of so vast an auditory.
+
+"For other variety there was a brilliant show duett on themes
+from La Somnambula for piano and violin by Messrs. Benedict and
+Noll, and a solo on the pianoforte by that most promising young
+artist, Hoffman. For this he chose De Meyer's fantasy on
+Semiramide, decidedly of the modern monster school of pianoforte
+composition, though quite a vigorous, graceful and redeeming
+specimen thereof.
+
+"And now for the 'Queen of Song'--or, if so qualifying it will
+better suit the Italians, the NORTHERN Queen of Song.
+
+"She commenced with one of the most tender and graceful, and
+hereabouts least hackneyed airs of Bellini--the Qui la Voce from
+I Puritani. Her liquid purity of voice and graceful gliding
+through its flowery labyrinthine passages was to us not more
+remarkable than the true but quiet fervor which animated it.
+Jenny Lind shows no feeling! and excites none! draws no tears!
+True Art supplies the place of tears by touching the emotions
+which are deeper and serener, and not a whit less human. But of
+this more fully when we have room.
+
+"The splendid song from Mozart's 'Magic Flute,' Non Paventar,
+brought into play the salient diamonds of her highest voice,
+which arches like the tall shaft of a fountain sparkling in the
+sun. The introduction, a bold, exhorting strain, in grandiose
+style, full of large intervals, was given with a glorious fervor,
+and no lark ever carolled more blithely or more at ease than her
+voice as it soared to F in alt! Benedict's English ballad, 'Take
+this Lute,' she sang with a simplicity and pathos that won the
+audience completely; and no part seemed more genuine or more
+expressive than the difficult cadenza at its close.
+
+"The romanza from Robert le Diable was perhaps the most
+fascinating of her more studied performances. This, like all her
+brilliant things, if not impassioned in the cheaper superficial
+sense, was at all events vital, and from the soul. She is never
+mechanical, whatever you may say about want of passion. Is any
+tragic pathos, such as is ready on the smallest occasion, or on
+none, more admirable and more inspiring, more from the inmost
+soul, than is that gushing up of a full, glad, true heart which
+is her native mood of song, and which was so glorious last night
+in the Ah! non Giunge from Somnambula? The rapturous encore to
+this was answered by the Swedish 'Herdsman's Song.'
+
+"It was in the song from Mozart's 'Magic Flute' that we first
+fully KNEW the voice and art and soul of Jenny Lind. She warmed
+to that music. It is narrow criticism which imprisons such a
+singer within the partial scope, albeit classical, of the Italian
+School; ignores that vital part of her which may exceed the
+conventional requirements of such a School, and condemns whatever
+in her is most characteristic, and in contrast with its models.
+It has been well said by those who make the most intelligent
+reference to those models and that school, that the style of the
+Swedish Nightingale is sui generis, as marked as her own
+personality. True, you would not say of her, in the conventional
+Italian sense of the word, what is often said in first
+acknowledgment of a good singer: 'She has STYLE'--meaning the one
+style which is assumed as the standard. If we are to limit style
+to that sense, Mdlle. Lind has more than style; she has
+genius--Northern genius, to be sure, which is precisely what she
+should have to make her greatness genuine. Song is original in
+her; and from her singing we drink in new life, after long
+satiety of such passion-sweets as have become habits rather than
+fresh inspirations in the delightful--we may almost say
+perfected--but yet confined music of the Italians.
+
+"It is, perhaps, too late to await the advent of a Queen of Song
+from the warm South. The South has had its turn; it has fulfilled
+its mission; the other end of the balance now comes up. The
+Northern Muse must sing her lesson to the world. Her fresher,
+chaster, more intellectual, and (as they only SEEM to some) her
+colder strains come in due season to recover our souls from the
+delicious languor of a Music which has been so wholly of the
+Feelings, that, for the want of some intellectual tonic and some
+spiritual temper, Feeling has degenerated into mere Sensibility
+and a very cheap kind of superficial, skin-deep excitability that
+usurps the name of Passion.
+
+"We admire and feel and love the Melody of Italy. We reverence
+her native gift of song, her popular sensibility to it. We have
+been again and again transported by her best vocal artists who
+have visited these shores, and they are not THE best--the
+world-wide celebrities, we have to confess, are only traditions
+to us--traditions, however, to which we yield ourselves in full
+faith. From what we HAVE heard and experienced of Italian
+singing, we know, as well as if we had heard Grisi, Pasta and
+Rubini, that it is not IN the genius of the Italian School to
+produce or hardly to appreciate such a new revelation of song as
+this human nightingale or canary of Sweden.
+
+"Is this underrating the Italian music? By no means. That is an
+established fact, and has its characteristic worth. Equally so,
+but in a contrasted way has the music of the North, which, till
+this Nightingale appeared, had found its utterance mainly through
+instruments and orchestras. Now it finds worthy utterance in
+song. But of its peculiar characteristic we must take another
+time to speak."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XVIII. CONTINUED TRIUMPH.
+
+SUCCESSFUL ADVERTISING--THE RESPONSIBILITIES OF RICHES--VISIT TO
+IRANISTAN--OVATIONS AT BOSTON, PHILADELPHIA, BALTIMORE AND
+WASHINGTON--VISIT TO MT. VERNON--CHARLESTON--HAVANA--FREDERICKA
+BREMER.
+
+All of Barnum's inventive powers were called into play
+effectually to advertise his song-bird. Biographies of Jenny Lind
+were circulated. "Foreign correspondence" raved over her talents,
+narratives of her benevolence filled the papers; her pictures and
+her name were seen everywhere. So when she made her first
+appearance, it was before an audience already wrought up to a
+high pitch of enthusiasm in her behalf. Never before, or after
+for that matter, was any singer so lauded by the press. The
+following editorial from the New York Herald of September 10th,
+1850, is a fair sample:
+
+"What ancient monarch was he, either in history or in fable, who
+offered half his kingdom (the price of box-tickets and choice
+seats in those days) for the invention of an original sensation,
+or the discovery of a fresh pleasure? That sensation--that
+pleasure which royal power in the Old World failed to
+discover--has been called into existence at a less price, by Mr.
+Barnum, a plain republican, and is now about to be enjoyed by the
+sovereigns of the New World.
+
+"Jenny Lind, the most remarkable phenomenon in the musical art
+which has for the last century flashed across the horizon of the
+Old World, is now among us, and will make her debut to-morrow
+night to a house of nearly ten thousand listeners, yielding in
+proceeds by auction, a sum of forty or fifty thousand dollars.
+For the last ten days our musical reporters have furnished our
+readers with every matter connected with her arrival in this
+metropolis, and the steps adopted by Mr. Barnum in preparation
+for her first appearance. The proceedings of yesterday,
+consisting of the sale of the remainder of the tickets, and the
+astonishing, the wonderful sensation produced at her first
+rehearsal on the few persons, critics in musical art, who were
+admitted on the occasion, will be found elsewhere in our columns.
+
+"We concur in everything that has been said by our musical
+reporter, describing her extraordinary genius--her unrivalled
+combination of power and art. Nothing has been exaggerated, not
+an iota. Three years ago, more or less, we heard Jenny Lind on
+many occasions, when she made the first great sensation in
+Europe, by her debut at the London Opera House. Then she was
+great in power--in art--in genius; now she is greater in all. We
+speak from experience and conviction. Then she astonished, and
+pleased, and fascinated the thousands of the British aristocracy;
+now she will fascinate, and please, and delight, and almost make
+mad with musical excitement, the millions of the American
+democracy. To-morrow night, this new sensation--this fresh
+movement--this excitement excelling all former excitements--will
+be called into existence, when she pours out the notes of Casta
+Diva, and exhibits her astonishing powers--her wonderful
+peculiarities, that seem more of heaven than of earth--more of a
+voice from eternity, than from the lips of a human being.
+
+"We speak soberly--seriously--calmly. The public expectation has
+run very high for the last week--higher than at any former period
+of our past musical annals. But high as it has risen, the
+reality--the fact--the concert--the voice of Jenny Lind--will far
+surpass all past expectations. Jenny Lind is a wonder, and a
+prodigy in song--and no mistake."
+
+Barnum had not hoped to manage such an enormous enterprise as
+this one, without some trouble and anxiety, but he soon
+discovered that in this case, realization far exceeded
+anticipation. He often declared that from the first concert,
+September 11th, 1850, until the ninety-third concert, June 9th,
+1851, he did not experience a single waking moment that was free
+from care.
+
+Miss Lind was utterly unprepared for the enthusiasm of her
+American audience, and it is scarcely to be wondered at that she
+should appear to listen at first to the dishonorable counsels of
+some of her friends, who constantly besought her to break her
+contract with Barnum, who, they urged, was "coining money out of
+her genius," and to take the enterprise into her own hands. But
+whether Miss Lind realized that Mr. Barnum's management was
+largely responsible for her triumph, or whether she was simply
+too high-minded to consider such a breach of honor, certain it is
+that she continued to stand by her contract. John Jay, her
+lawyer, took every occasion to interfere, and Barnum suffered
+much from his unreasonable intrusions. The following letter,
+written to Mr. Joshua Bates of Baring Bros. & Co., London, will
+show the difficulties which beset the perplexed manager:
+
+                                   "NEW YORK, October 23, 1850.
+
+"JOSHUA BATES, Esq.:
+
+"Dear Sir: I take the liberty to write you a few lines, merely to
+say that we are getting along as well as could reasonably be
+expected. In this country you are aware that the rapid
+accumulation of wealth always creates much envy, and envy soon
+augments to malice. Such are the elements at work to a limited
+degree against myself, and although Miss Lind, Benedict and
+myself have never, as yet, had the slightest feelings between us,
+to my knowledge, except those of friendship, yet I cannot well
+see how this can long continue in the face of the fact that,
+nearly every day they allow persons (some moving in the first
+classes of society) to approach them, and spend hours in
+traducing me; even her attorney, Mr. John Jay, has been so blind
+to her interests, as to aid in poisoning her mind against me, by
+pouring into her ears the most silly twaddle, all of which
+amounts to nothing and less than nothing--such as the regret that
+I was a showman, exhibiter of Tom Thumb, etc., etc.
+
+"Without the elements which I possess for business, as well as my
+knowledge of human nature, acquired in catering for the public,
+the result of her concerts here would not have been pecuniarily
+one-half as much as the present--and such men as the Hon. Edward
+Everett, G. G. Howland, and others, will tell you that there is
+no charlatanism or lack of dignity in my management of these
+concerts. I know as well as any person, that the merits of Jenny
+Lind are the best capital to depend upon to secure public favor,
+and I have thus far acted on this knowledge. Everything which
+money and attention can procure for their comfort, they have, and
+I am glad to know that they are satisfied on this score. All I
+fear is, that these continued backbitings, if listened to by her,
+will, by and by, produce a feeling of distrust or regret, which
+will lead to unpleasant results.
+
+"The fact is, her mind ought to be as free as air, and she
+herself as free as a bird, and being satisfied of my probity and
+ability, she should turn a deaf ear to all envious and malevolent
+attacks on me. I have hoped that by thus briefly stating to you
+the facts in the case, you might be induced for her interests as
+well as mine to drop a line of advice to Mr. Benedict and another
+to Mr. Jay on this subject. If I am asking or expecting too much,
+I pray you to not give it a thought, for I feel myself fully able
+to carry through my rights alone, although I should deplore
+nothing so much as to be obliged to do so in a feeling of
+unfriendliness. I have risked much money on the issue of this
+speculation--it has proved successful. I am full of perplexity
+and anxiety, and labor continually for success, and I cannot
+allow ignorance or envy to rob me of the fruits of my enterprise.
+                        "Sincerely and gratefully yours,
+                                              "P. T. BARNUM."
+
+Miss Lind's benevolence had been so largely extolled that it was
+not surprising that she should have been continually beset by
+applicants for charity.
+
+In almost all cases she gave liberally in sums varying from $20
+to $1,000, and to one Swedish friend, it is said, she actually
+gave $5,000.
+
+On her return from Boston to New York the whole party stopped at
+Iranistan, Mr. Barnum's Bridgeport place. The next morning Miss
+Lind was escorted over the grounds, the beauty of which delighted
+her. "Do you know, Mr. Barnum," she said, "that if you had not
+built Iranistan, I should never have come to America for you?"
+Mr. Barnum, much surprised, asked her to explain.
+
+"I had received several applications to visit the United States,"
+she continued, "but I did not much like the appearance of the
+applicants, nor did I relish the idea of crossing 3,000 miles of
+ocean; so I declined them all. But the first letter which Mr.
+Wilton, your agent, addressed me, was written upon a sheet headed
+with a beautiful engraving of Iranistan. It attracted my
+attention. I said to myself, a gentleman who has been so
+successful in his business as to be able to build and reside in
+such a palace cannot be a mere 'adventurer.' So I wrote to your
+agent, and consented to an interview, which I should have
+declined, if I had not seen the picture of Iranistan."
+
+"That, then, fully pays me for building it," replied Barnum.
+
+The night after Miss Lind's arrival in Boston, there was a
+display of fireworks, in her honor, in front of the Revere House,
+which was followed by a torchlight procession by the Germans of
+the city. At Philadelphia, they were met by such a dense throng
+of people that it was with the greatest difficulty that they
+pressed through the crowds to their hotel. Jenny was suffering
+from a very severe headache and retired at once to her rooms.
+Outside, the streets were packed with the thousands that had
+followed them to the door, and were now clamoring for Jenny Lind.
+
+Knowing that the noise would seriously disturb the sensitive
+songstress, Barnum tried to induce the crowd to disperse; but
+they declared they would not until Miss Lind appeared on the
+balcony. In despair he finally put Jenny's bonnet and shawl on
+her companion, Miss Ahmansen, who went out on the balcony and
+bowed gracefully to the multitude, who gave three hearty cheers
+and dispersed.
+
+Miss Lind hated crowds, and always wished her arrival in any city
+kept secret, so as to avoid the excitement of a public reception,
+but Barnum knew that the success of the enterprise depended in a
+large measure on this very excitement.
+
+One day Miss Lind remarked to Mr. Barnum, "I have just heard that
+you and I are to be married. Now how do you suppose such a report
+ever originated?"
+
+"Probably from the fact that we are 'engaged,' suggested Barnum,
+the inveterate punster.
+
+Miss Lind always went to church when she could do so without
+attracting too much attention, always inquiring for the Swedish
+church wherever it could be found.
+
+One Sunday in Baltimore, Miss Caroline Barnum, now Mrs. David W.
+Thompson, of New York, went with a friend of hers who resided in
+the city, into the choir, where she joined in the singing.
+
+A number of people in the audience had seen her with her father
+the day previous and supposed her to be Jenny Lind. Like
+lightning the news that Jenny Lind was in the choir, flew through
+the church, and when Miss Barnum, whose voice was not at all
+extraordinary, rose with the rest to sing, the congregation
+listened breathlessly. "Heavenly!" "Exquisite!" "Angelic!" sighed
+the excited audience. The two young ladies, all unconscious of
+the furore they had inspired were utterly astonished when, after
+church, the crowd pressed round them so closely that they had the
+greatest difficulty in reaching their carriage.
+
+The day after their appearance in Washington, President Fillmore
+called, and left his card, Miss Lind being out. Jenny was very
+much flurried when she returned, and was prepared to call at the
+White House immediately, as would have been proper had Mr.
+Fillmore been the head of any European country. Barnum assured
+her, however, that etiquette was not so strict in America, and
+she postponed her visit until the next day, when with Benedict,
+Belletti and Mr. Barnum she spent several delightful hours in the
+President's family.
+
+The President, the Cabinet and nearly every member of Congress
+attended both concerts. The great Statesman Webster was so
+pleased with one of her songs that he drew himself up to his full
+height and bowed profoundly, to Miss Lind's great gratification.
+Of all the distinguished men who called upon her in Washington,
+none impressed her like Webster. She walked up and down in great
+excitement after he had gone, exclaiming: "Ah! Mr. Barnum, what a
+man! I have never before seen such a man!"
+
+Miss Lind was escorted through both Houses of Congress and
+through the Capitol and grounds, by Hon. C. F. Cleveland,
+Representative from Connecticut. She was very much pleased with
+everything and asked innumerable questions about the American
+Government.
+
+During their stay in Washington, they were invited by Colonel
+Washington, then owner of Mt. Vernon, to visit the home and the
+tomb of the first President.
+
+The party first visited the tomb and then proceeded to the house
+where they were introduced to Mrs. Washington and several other
+ladies.
+
+Much interest was shown by Miss Lind in examining the various
+mementos of the great man, and when before leaving, Mrs.
+Washington presented her with a book from the library with
+Washington's autograph on the title page, she was overwhelmed
+with emotion.
+
+Miss Lind had been through so much excitement in the North that
+she determined to see no callers during her stay in the South.
+One young lady, the daughter of a wealthy planter, was so
+determined to see her, that she bribed a maid to lend her her cap
+and apron, and let her carry in Miss Lind's tea. This incident
+amused Barnum immensely, but Miss Lind was much vexed, declaring
+the young lady's motive to be curiosity rather than admiration.
+The voyage from Wilmington to Charleston had been very rough, the
+trip requiring over thirty-six hours. When they arrived at last,
+the vessel had been given up for lost and the wreck had been
+telegraphed all over the country. The voyage to Havana was very
+much pleasanter, however.
+
+Arriving there, they found the house which Mr. Barnum had sent a
+man on to provide for them, anything but comfortable. Miss Lind,
+especially, was much displeased, and, hiring a carriage, she
+drove off, accompanied by an interpreter. She was gone four
+hours, to the great alarm of the rest of the party. Returning,
+she announced that she had hired a charming house in the suburbs,
+and invited the whole company to be her guests during their stay
+in Havana. It is needless to say they accepted her invitation.
+
+There, freed from all care and annoyance and away from the too
+zealous counsellors, she spent a delightful month, seeing no
+callers, coming and going as she pleased, and romping like a
+schoolgirl in the great court-yard back of the house. She used to
+force Mr. Barnum to play ball with her until he was exhausted and
+fain to beg off. Then she would laugh and say: "Oh, Mr. Barnum!
+you are too fat and lazy; you cannot stand it to play ball with
+me."
+
+The celebrated Swedish authoress, Fredericka Bremer, spent a few
+days with them in their Havana retreat.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XIX. HAVANA.
+
+CONQUEST OF THE HABANEROS--THE ITALIAN AND HIS DOG--MAD
+BENNETT--A SUCCESSFUL RUSE--RETURN TO NEW ORLEANS--A LUDICROUS
+INCIDENT--UP THE MISSISSIPPI--LEGERDEMAIN.
+
+Soon after arriving at Havana, Barnum made a discovery. The
+Habaneros, not accustomed to the high prices which opera tickets
+command in the States, had determined that they would force
+Barnum to lower the admission fee. This the manager refused to
+do, and it soon became evident that although they attended the
+concerts, they were not disposed to show the singer the least
+favor. It was, therefore, with much inward trepidation that
+Barnum watched the curtain rise on the first concert. The
+following account of that concert is taken from the New York
+Tribune:
+
+"Jenny Lind soon appeared, led on by Signor Belletti. Some three
+or four hundred persons clapped their hands at her appearance,
+but this token of approbation was instantly silenced by at least
+two thousand five hundred decided hisses. Thus having settled the
+matter that there should be no forestalling of public opinion,
+and that it applause was given to Jenny Lind in that house it
+should first be incontestably earned, the most solemn silence
+prevailed. I have heard the Swedish Nightingale often in Europe
+as well as in America, and have ever noticed a distinct
+tremulousness attending her first appearance in any city. Indeed
+this feeling was plainly manifested in her countenance as she
+neared the foot-lights; but when she witnessed the kind of
+reception in store for her--so different from anything she had
+reason to expect--her countenance changed in an instant to a
+haughty self-possession, her eyes flashed defiance, and, becoming
+immovable as a statue, she stood there perfectly calm and
+beautiful. She was satisfied that she now had an ordeal to pass
+and a victory to gain worthy of her powers. In a moment her eye
+scanned the immense audience, the music began and then
+followed--how can I describe it?--such heavenly strains as I
+verily believe mortal never breathed except Jenny Lind, and
+mortal never heard except from her lips. Some of the oldest
+Castilians kept a frown upon their brow and a curling sneer upon
+their lips; their ladies, however, and most of the audience began
+to look surprised. The gushing melody flowed on, increasing in
+beauty and glory. The caballeros, the senoras and senoritas began
+to look at each other; nearly all, however, kept their teeth
+clenched and their lips closed, evidently determined to resist to
+the last. The torrent flowed deeper and faster, the lark flew
+higher and higher, the melody grew richer and grander; still
+every lip was compressed. By and by, as the rich notes came
+dashing in rivers upon our enraptured ears, one poor critic
+involuntarily whispered a 'brava.' This outbursting of the soul
+was instantly hissed down. The stream of harmony rolled on till,
+at the close, it made a clean sweep of every obstacle, and
+carried all before it. Not a vestige of opposition remained, but
+such a tremendous shout of applause as went up I never before
+heard.
+
+"The triumph was most complete. And how was Jenny Lind affected?
+She who stood a few moments previous like adamant, now trembled
+like a reed in the wind before the storm of enthusiasm which her
+own simple notes had produced. Tremblingly, slowly, and almost
+bowing her face to the ground, she withdrew. The roar and
+applause of victory increased. 'Encore! encore! encore!' came
+from every lip. She again appeared, and courtesying low, again
+withdrew; but again, again and again did they call her out and at
+every appearance the thunders of applause rang louder and louder.
+Thus five times was Jenny Lind called out to receive their
+unanimous and deafening plaudits."
+
+With tears of joy rolling down his cheeks, Barnum rushed behind
+the scenes, and met her as she was withdrawing after the fifth
+encore.
+
+"God bless you, Jenny," he cried, "you've settled them!"
+
+"Are you satisfied?" said the singer, throwing her arms around
+his neck and weeping for joy. This was the first she had known of
+the opposition, all hint of it having been kept from her by Mr.
+Barnum, but she fully sympathized with him in his determination
+not to lower the prices.
+
+The papers continued to cry out for a reduction, and this caused
+many people to stay away from the concerts, expecting Barnum to
+yield. But when, after three concerts, it was announced that the
+next one, devoted to charity, was also to be Miss Lind's
+farewell, they became very much excited. Committees waited on
+them to request more concerts, which resulted only in refusals:
+some of the leading Dons offered to guarantee them $25,000, for
+three concerts, but Barnum assured them that there was not money
+enough in the Island of Cuba to induce him to consent.
+
+The proceeds of the fourth concert were distributed between two
+hospitals and a convent, besides giving $500 to Barnum's old
+protege Vivalla, the little Italian plate-dancer, whom they had
+met in Havana. The poor fellow's fortunes were at a very low ebb,
+having lost the use of his left side from paralysis. He supported
+himself by exhibiting a performing dog, which turned a spinning
+wheel and did several other tricks. Miss Lind had heard of his
+case and was very anxious that part of the benefit money should
+be given him.
+
+The morning after the concert the bell rang and Barnum found, on
+going to the door, a procession of children from the convent
+which had received a large sum of money from Miss Lind. The
+children were attended by ten or twelve priests in rich
+vestments. They had come to see the songstress and to thank her
+in person. But Jenny shrank from appearing before such a stately
+deputation: "Tell them I cannot see them," she exclaimed. "They
+have nothing to thank me for. If I have done good it was no more
+than my duty." And the grand procession with its wreaths and
+banners, were obliged to depart.
+
+The same day, Vivalla called and brought her a basket of fruit.
+With tears of joy, he called down every blessing on the head of
+the benevolent lady. "I shall go back to Italy! I shall see my
+brothers and sisters again!" he cried. Miss Lind had gone for a
+drive, but Barnum promised to give her the fruit and the message.
+As he was passing out the door he hesitated end said: "Mr.
+Barnum, I should like so much to have the good lady see my dog
+turn a wheel. It is very nice; he can spin very good; shall I
+bring the dog and the wheel for her? She is such a good lady, I
+wish to please her very much." Mr. Barnum told the grateful
+fellow that Miss Lind had refused to see the priests from the
+convent that morning, because she never received thanks for
+favors, and that he was quite welcome to the money.
+
+When Miss Lind returned and heard the story, she exclaimed: "Poor
+man, poor man, do let him come; its all the good creature can do
+for me;" then with tears rolling down her face--"I like that, I
+like that; do let him come and bring his dog. It will make him so
+happy."
+
+"God bless you, it WILL make him happy," said Barnum. "He shall
+come to-morrow." And he went himself to tell Vivalla that Jenny
+Lind would see his dog perform, the next day at four precisely.
+
+"I will be punctual," said Vivalla, quite overcome with emotion,
+"but I was SURE she would like to see my dog perform."
+
+For full half an hour before the time appointed did Jenny Lind
+sit in her window on the second floor and watch for Vivalla and
+his dog. A few minutes before the appointed hour, she saw him
+coming. "Ah, here he comes! here he comes!" she exclaimed in
+delight, as she ran down stairs and opened the door to admit him.
+A negro boy was bringing the small spinning-wheel, while Vivalla
+led the dog. Handing the boy a silver coin, she motioned him
+away, and taking the wheel in her arms, she said, "This is very
+kind of you to come with your dog. Follow me. I will carry the
+wheel up stairs." Her servant offered to take the wheel, but no,
+she would let no one carry it but herself. She called the whole
+party to her parlor, and for one full hour did she devote herself
+to the happy Italian. She went down on her knees to pet the dog
+and to ask Vivalla all sorts of questions about his performances,
+his former course of life, his friends in Italy, and his present
+hopes and determinations. Then she sang and played for him, gave
+him some refreshments, finally insisted on carrying his wheel to
+the door, and her servant accompanied Vivalla to his
+boarding-house.
+
+Poor Vivalla! He was probably never so happy before, but his
+enjoyment did not exceed that of Miss Lind. A few months later,
+however, the Havana correspondent of the New York Herald
+announced the death of Vivalla, and stated that the poor
+Italian's last words were about Jenny Lind and Mr. Barnum.
+
+In the party which accompanied Barnum to Havana was a man who had
+formerly kept the Peale Museum in New York, afterwards managing
+the establishment for Mr. Barnum. At present he was acting as
+ticket-taker.
+
+He was a curious fellow, at times full of fun and gayety and at
+other times melancholy to the verge of insanity. Madness ran in
+his family, and one of his brothers, in a moment of frenzy had
+blown his brains out. Barnum knew of Bennett's tendency to
+melancholy and watched him constantly. When they were on board
+the steamer "Falcon" on their way back to New Orleans, a
+thrilling incident occurred which Barnum afterwards related in
+this way:
+
+Mr. James Gordon Bennett, editor of the New York Herald, and his
+wife, were also passengers. After permitting one favorable notice
+in his paper, Bennett had turned around, as usual, and had abused
+Jenny Lind and bitterly attacked me. I was always glad to get
+such notices, for they served as inexpensive advertisements to my
+museum.
+
+"Ticket-taker Bennett, however, took much to heart the attacks of
+Editor Bennett upon Jenny Lind. When Editor Bennett came on board
+the 'Falcon,' his violent name-sake said to a by-stander:
+
+" 'I would willingly be drowned if I could see that old scoundrel
+go to the bottom of the sea.'
+
+"Several of our party overheard the remark and I turned
+laughingly to Bennett and said: Nonsense; he can't harm any one,
+and there is an old proverb about the impossibility of drowning
+those who are born for another fate.'
+
+"That very night, however, as I stood near the cabin door,
+conversing with my treasurer and other members of my company,
+Henry Bennett came up to me with a wild air, and hoarsely
+whispered:
+
+" 'Old Bennett has gone forward alone in the dark--and I am going
+to throw him overboard!'
+
+"We were all startled, for we knew the man, and he seemed
+terribly in earnest. Knowing how most effectively to address him
+at such times, I exclaimed:
+
+" 'Ridiculous! you would not do such a thing.'
+
+" 'I swear I will,' was his savage reply. I expostulated with
+him, and several of our party joined me.
+
+" 'Nobody will know it,' muttered the maniac, 'and I shall be
+doing the world a favor.'
+
+"I endeavored to awaken him to a sense of the crime he
+contemplated, assuring him that it could not possibly benefit any
+one, and that from the fact of the relations existing between the
+editor and myself, I should be the first to be accused of his
+murder. I implored him to go to his stateroom, and he finally did
+so, accompanied by some of the gentlemen of our party. I took
+pains to see that he was carefully watched that night, and,
+indeed, for several days, till he became calm again. He was a
+large, athletic man, quite able to pick up his name-sake and drop
+him overboard. The matter was too serious for a joke, and we made
+little mention of it; but more than one of our party said then,
+and has said since, what I really believe to be true, that 'James
+Gordon Bennett would have been drowned that night had it not been
+for P. T. Barnum.' "
+
+Bennett's end was tragic, as might be expected. Sometime after
+the Havana journey Barnum sent him to London. He conducted the
+business successfully, wrote up the accounts to a penny, then
+handing the papers to a mutual friend with directions to give
+them to Barnum when he should arrive, he went to his lodgings and
+committed suicide.
+
+"In New Orleans the wharf was crowded by a great concourse of
+persons, as the steamer "Falcon" approached. Jenny Lind had
+enjoyed a month of quiet, and dreaded the excitement which she
+must now again encounter.
+
+"Mr Barnum, I am sure I can never get through that crowd," she
+said in despair.
+
+"Leave that to me. Remain quiet for ten minutes, and there shall
+be no crowd here," replied Barnum.
+
+Taking his daughter on his arm, she drew her vail over her face
+and they descended the gangway.
+
+"That's Barnum, I know him," called out several persons at the
+top of their voices.
+
+"Open the way, if you please for Mr. Barnum and Miss Lind!" cried
+Le Grand Smith over the railing of the ship, the deck of which he
+had just reached from the wharf.
+
+"Don't crowd her, if you please, gentlemen," said Barnum, and so
+pushing and squeezing they reached the carriage and drove to Miss
+Lind's apartments. A few minutes later Jenny and her companion
+came quietly in a carriage and were in the house before the ruse
+was discovered. In answer to the calls of the crowd she appeared
+on the balcony, and bowed to the throng, which gave her three
+cheers and dispersed.
+
+A very funny incident occurred in New Orleans. Next to the
+theatre where the concerts were given, was an exhibition in the
+large open lots of mammoth hogs, grizzly bears and other animals.
+
+A gentleman had a son about twelve years old, who had a wonderful
+ear for music. He could whistle or sing any tune after hearing it
+once. His father did not know nor care for a single note, but so
+anxious was he to please his son, that he paid thirty dollars for
+two tickets to the concert.
+
+"I liked the music better than I expected," said he the next day,
+"but my son was in raptures. He was so perfectly enchanted that
+he scarcely spoke the whole evening, and I would on no account
+disturb his delightful reveries. When the concert was finished we
+came out of the theatre. Not a word was spoken. I knew that my
+musical prodigy was happy among the clouds, and I said nothing. I
+could not help envying him his love of music, and considered my
+thirty dollars as nothing, compared to the bliss which it secured
+to him. Indeed, I was seriously thinking of taking him to the
+next concert, when he spoke. We were just passing the numerous
+shows upon the vacant lots. One of the signs attracted him, and
+he said, 'Father, let us go in and see the big hog!' The little
+scamp! I could have horse-whipped him!' said the father, who
+loving a joke, could not help laughing at the ludicrous incident.
+
+The party took passage to Cairo, Illinois, in the beautiful river
+steamer "Magnolia." They had made arrangements with the captain
+to delay in Natchez and in Memphis where concerts were given.
+
+The time on board the steamer was pleasantly spent in reading and
+watching the scenery. One day they had a musicale in the ladies'
+cabin for the gratification of the passengers, at which Miss Lind
+volunteered to sing. Barnum amused the passengers with his
+inexhaustible fund of anecdotes and stories, and the tricks of
+legerdemain, which he had learned and used in the South under
+rather different circumstances. Among other tricks, he made a
+silver piece disappear so mysteriously that the negro barber who
+witnessed the feat, came to the conclusion that the great man
+must be in league with the devil. "The next morning," says Mr.
+Barnum, "I seated myself in the barber's chair and the darkey
+began to talk:
+
+" 'Beg pardon, Mr. Barnum, but I have heard a great deal about
+you, and I saw more than I wanted to see last night. Is it true
+that you have sold yourself to the devil, so that you can do what
+you've a mind to?'
+
+" 'Oh, yes," was my reply, 'that is the bargain between us.'
+
+" 'How long did you agree for?' was the question next in order.
+
+" 'Only nine years,' said I. 'I have had three of them already.
+Before the other six are out, I shall find a way to nonplus the
+old gentleman, and I have told him so to his face.'
+
+"At this avowal, a larger space of white than usual was seen in
+the darkey's eyes, and he inquired, 'Is it by this bargain that
+you get so much money?'
+
+" 'Certainly. No matter who has money, nor where he keeps it, in
+his box or till, or anywhere about him, I have only to speak the
+words and it comes.'
+
+"The shaving was completed in silence, but thought had been busy
+in the barber's mind, and he embraced the speediest opportunity
+to transfer his bag of coin to the iron safe in charge of the
+clerk.
+
+The movement did not escape me, and immediately a joke was afoot.
+I had barely time to make two or three details of arrangement
+with the clerk, and resume my seat in the cabin, ere the barber
+sought a second interview, bent on testing the alleged powers of
+Beelzebub's colleague.
+
+" 'Beg pardon, Mr. Barnum, but where is my money? Can you get
+it?'
+
+" 'I do not want your money,' was the quiet answer. 'It is safe.'
+
+" 'Yes, I know it is safe--ha! ha!--it is in the iron safe in the
+clerk's office--safe enough from you?'
+
+" 'It is not in the iron safe!' said I. This was said so quietly,
+yet positively, that the colored gentleman ran to the office, and
+inquired if all was safe. 'All right,' said the clerk. 'Open, and
+let me see,' replied the barber. The safe was unlocked and lo!
+the money was gone!
+
+"In mystified terror the loser applied to me for relief. 'You
+will find the bag in your drawer,' said I, and there it was
+found!
+
+"His curiosity was still great. 'Please do another trick,' said
+he.
+
+" 'Very well,' I replied, 'stand perfectly still.'
+
+"He did so, and I commenced muttering some mysterious words, as
+if performing an incantation.
+
+" 'What are you doing?' said the barber.
+
+" 'I am changing you into a black cat,' I replied, 'but don't be
+afraid; I will change you back again, if I don't forget the words
+to do it with.'
+
+"This was too much for the terrified darkey; with an awful
+screech he rushed to the side of the boat resolved to drown
+rather than undergo such a transformation.
+
+"He was captured and brought back to me, when I dispelled his
+fright by explaining the way in which I had tricked him. Relieved
+and reassured, he clapped his hands and executed an impromtu jig,
+exclaiming, 'Ha! ha! when I get back to New Orleans won't I come
+de Barnum ober dem niggers!' "
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XX. THE TRIALS OF AN IMPRESSARIO.
+
+ST. LOUIS--THE SECRETARY'S LITTLE GAME--LEGAL ADVICE--SMOOTH
+WATERS AGAIN--BARNUM'S EFFORTS APPRECIATED--AN EXTRAVAGANT
+ENCONIUM.
+
+The concerts at Natchez and Memphis were extremely successful.
+The sixty-first concert was given in St. Louis, and on the
+morning of their arrival in the city Miss Lind's secretary came
+to Mr. Barnum, commissioned, as he claimed, by the singer, and
+told the Manager that as sixty concerts had already been given,
+Miss Lind proposed to avail herself of one of the conditions of
+the contract and cancel the engagement next morning. Much
+startled by this sudden complication, but outwardly undisturbed,
+Barnum asked if Miss Lind had authorized the notice. "I so
+understand it," was the secretary's reply. Thinking that it might
+be another scheme of her advisers and that Miss Lind herself
+might possibly know nothing of it, Barnum told the secretary that
+he would see him again in an hour. He then proceeded to his old
+friend Sol Smith for legal advice. They went over the contract
+together, Barnum telling his friend of the annoyances he had
+suffered from Miss Lind's advisers, and they both agreed that if
+she broke the contract thus suddenly, she was bound to pay back
+all that she had received over the stipulated $1000, for each
+concert. As she had been paid $137,000, for sixty concerts, this
+extra money amounted to something like $77,000.
+
+Barnum then went back to the secretary and told him that he was
+ready to settle with Miss Lind and to close the engagement.
+
+"But," said he, evidently much surprised, "you have already
+advertised concerts in Louisville and Cincinnati, have you not?"
+
+"Yes," answered Barnum calmly, "but you may take the contracts
+for halls and printing off my hands at cost." He further offered
+the assistance of his agent and his own personal services to give
+Miss Lind a good start on her own account.
+
+The secretary emboldened by this liberality then made a
+proposition so extraordinary that Barnum at once saw that Miss
+Lind could have had nothing to do with the scheme.
+
+"Now suppose," he asked, "Miss Lind should wish to give some
+fifty concerts in this country, what would you charge as
+manager?"
+
+"A million dollars a concert," answered Barnum promptly; then he
+added, "Now see here; I don't believe Miss Lind has authorized
+you to make this proposition. If she has, just bring me a line to
+that effect, over her own signature, and her check for the amount
+due me by the terms of our contract, some $77,000, and we will
+close our business connection at once."
+
+"But why not make a new arrangement," persisted the secretary,
+"for fifty more concerts, by which Miss Lind will pay you
+liberally, say $1,000 a concert?"
+
+"For the simple reason that I hired Miss Lind, and not she me,"
+replied Barnum, "and because I ought never to take a farthing
+less for my risk and trouble than the contract gives me. I have
+voluntarily given Miss Lind more than twice as much as I
+originally contracted to give her, or as she expected to receive
+when she engaged with me. Now if she is not satisfied I wish to
+settle instantly and finally. If you do not bring me her decision
+to-day, I shall ask her for it in the morning."
+
+The next morning Barnum asked him again for the written
+communication from Miss Lind; the secretary replied that it was
+all a "joke," and that he merely wanted to see what the manager
+would say to the proposition. He begged that nothing would be
+said to Miss Lind concerning it. So it is altogether likely that
+she knew nothing of it. The four concerts at St. Louis were given
+and the program as arranged for the other cities was carried out,
+with no more troublous incidents occurring.
+
+To show that Barnum's efforts as manager of the Jenny Lind
+enterprise were appreciated, we copy the dedication of Sol
+Smith's Autobiography published in 1854. Smith was one of the
+characters of his time, being celebrated as a comedian, an
+author, a manager and a lawyer:
+
+"TO PHINEAS T. BARNUM, PROPRIETOR OF THE AMERICAN MUSEUM, ETC.
+
+"Great Impressario. Whilst you were engaged in your grand Jenny
+Lind speculation, the following conundrum went the rounds of the
+American newspapers:
+
+" 'Why is it that Jenny Lind and Barnum will never fall out?'
+Answer: 'Because he is always for-getting, and she is always
+for-giving.'
+
+"I have never asked you the question directly, whether you, Mr.
+Barnum, started that conundrum, or not; but I strongly suspect
+that you did. At all events, I noticed that your whole policy was
+concentrated into one idea--to make an angel of Jenny, and
+depreciate yourself in contrast.
+
+"You may remember that in this city (St. Louis), I acted in one
+instance as your 'legal adviser,' and as such, necessarily became
+acquainted with all the particulars of your contract with the
+so-called Swedish Nightingale, as well as the various
+modifications claimed by that charitable lady, and submitted to
+by you after her arrival in this country; which modifications (I
+suppose it need no longer be a secret) secured to her--besides
+the original stipulation of one thousand dollars for every
+concert, attendants, carriages, assistant artists, and a pompous
+and extravagant retinue, fit (only) for a European
+princess--one-half of the profits of each performance. You may
+also remember the legal advice I gave you on the occasion
+referred to, and the salutary effect of your following it. You
+must remember the extravagant joy you felt afterwards, in
+Philadelphia, when the 'Angel' made up her mind to avail herself
+of one of the stipulations in her contract, to break off at the
+end of a hundred nights, and even bought out seven of that
+hundred--supposing that she could go on without your aid as well
+as with it. And you cannot but remember, how, like a rocket-stick
+she dropped, when your business connection with her ended, and
+how she 'fizzed out' the remainder of her concert nights in this
+part of the world, and soon afterwards retired to her domestic
+blissitude in Sweden.
+
+"You know, Mr. Barnum, if you would only tell, which of the two
+it was that was 'for-getting,' and which 'for-giving;' and you
+also know who actually gave the larger portion of those sums
+which you heralded to the world as the sole gifts of the 'divine
+Jenny.'
+
+"Of all your speculations--from the negro centenarian, who didn't
+nurse General Washington, down to the Bearded Woman of
+Genoa--there was not one which required the exercise of so much
+humbuggery as the Jenny Lind concerts; and I verily believe there
+is no man living, other than yourself, who could, or would, have
+risked the enormous expenditure of money necessary to carry them
+through successfully--travelling, with sixty artists; four
+thousand miles, and giving ninety-three concerts, at an actual
+cost of forty-five hundred dollars each, is what no other man
+would have undertaken --you accomplished this, and pocketed by
+the operation but little less than two hundred thousand dollars!
+Mr. Barnum, you are yourself, alone!
+
+"I honor you, oh! Great Impressario, as the most successful
+manager in America or any other country. Democrat, as you are,
+you can give a practical lesson to the aristocrats of Europe how
+to live. At your beautiful and tasteful residence, 'Iranistan' (I
+don't like the name, though), you can and do entertain your
+friends with a warmth of hospitality, only equalled by that of
+the great landed proprietors of the old country, or of our own
+'sunny South.' Whilst riches are pouring into your coffers from
+your various 'ventures' in all parts of the world, you do not
+hoard your immense means, but continually 'cast them forth upon
+the waters,' rewarding labor, encouraging the arts, and lending a
+helping hand to industry in all its branches. Not content with
+doing all this, you deal telling blows, whenever opportunity
+offers, upon the monster Intemperance. Your labors in this great
+cause alone should entitle you to the thanks of all good men,
+women and children in the land. Mr. Barnum, you deserve all your
+good fortune, and I hope you may long live to enjoy your wealth
+and honor.
+
+"As a small installment towards the debt, I, as one of the
+community, owe you, and with the hope of affording you an hour's
+amusement (if you can spare that amount of time from your
+numerous avocations to read it), I present you with this little
+volume, containing a very brief account of some of my
+'journey-work' in the South and West; and remain, very
+respectfully,
+                 "Your friend, and affectionate uncle,
+                                             "SOL SMITH.
+
+"CHOUTEAU AVENUE, ST. LOUIS,
+"NOV. 1, 1854."
+
+Although Barnum never acknowledged it, there was a vast deal of
+truth in Mr. Smith's statements.
+
+Whenever Miss Lind sang for charity she gave what she might have
+earned at a regular concert; Barnum always insisted upon paying
+for the hall, orchestra, printing and other expenses. But Miss
+Lind received the entire credit for liberality and benevolence.
+
+It is but just to say, however, that she frequently remonstrated
+with Barnum and declared that the expenses ought to be deducted
+from the proceeds of the concert, but he always insisted on doing
+what he called his share.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXI. CLOSING THE GRAND TOUR.
+
+APRIL FOOL JOKES AT NASHVILLE--A TRICK AT CINCINNATI--RETURN TO
+NEW YORK--JENNY LIND PERSUADED TO LEAVE BARNUM--FINANCIAL RESULTS
+OF THE ENTERPRISE.
+
+Five concerts were given at St. Louis, and then they went to
+Nashville, Tenn., where the sixty-sixth and sixty-seventh of the
+series were given. At the latter place, Jenny Lind, accompanied
+by Barnum and his daughter, Mrs. Lyman, visited "The Hermitage,"
+where Barnum himself had years before seen "Old Hickory" Jackson.
+While there, the prima donna heard, for the first time in her
+life, wild mocking birds singing in the trees, and great was her
+delight thereat.
+
+They spent the first of April, 1851, at Nashville. In the
+forenoon of the day, the various members of the party amused
+themselves by playing little "April Fool" jokes on Barnum, and
+after dinner he took his revenge upon them. Securing a supply of
+telegraph blanks and envelopes, he set to work preparing messages
+full of the most sensational and startling intelligence, for most
+of the people in the party. Almost every one of them presently
+received what purported to be a telegraphic despatch. Barnum's
+own daughter did not escape. She was informed that her mother,
+her cousin, and several other relatives, were waiting for her in
+Louisville, and various other important and extraordinary items
+of domestic intelligence were communicated to her. Mr. Le Grand
+Smith was told by a despatch from his father that his native
+village in Connecticut, was in ashes, including his own
+homestead, etc. Several of Barnum's employees had most liberal
+offers of engagements from banks and other institutions at the
+North. Burke, and others of the musical professors, were offered
+princely salaries by opera managers, and many of them received
+most tempting inducements to proceed immediately to the World's
+Fair in London.
+
+One married gentleman received the gratifying intelligence that
+he had for two days been the father of a pair of bouncing boys
+(mother and children doing well), an event which he had been
+anxiously looking for during the week, though on a somewhat more
+limited scale. In fact, nearly every person in the party engaged
+by Barnum received some extraordinary telegraphic intelligence;
+and, as the great impressario managed to have the despatches
+delivered simultaneously, each recipient was for some time busily
+occupied with his own personal news.
+
+By and by each began to tell his neighbor his good or bad
+tidings; and each was, of course, rejoiced or grieved, according
+to circumstances. Several gave Mr. Barnum notice of their
+intention to leave him, in consequence of better offers; and a
+number of them sent off telegraphic despatches and letters by
+mail, in answer to those received.
+
+The man who had so suddenly become the father of twins,
+telegraphed to his wife to "be of good cheer," and that he would
+"start for home to-morrow." And so cleverly did Barnum manage the
+whole business that his victims did not discover how they had
+been fooled until next morning, when they read the whole story in
+a local newspaper, to which it had been given by Barnum himself.
+
+From Nashville, Jenny Lind and a few of the party went to the
+Mammoth Cave, and thence to Louisville, the others going directly
+to the latter point by steamer. There they were joined by Signor
+Salvi, whom Barnum had engaged at Havana. Three concerts were
+given at Louisville, and they then proceeded to Cincinnati,
+accompanied by George D. Prentice, the famous editor of The
+Louisville Journal. A stop was made at Madison long enough to
+give one concert, and they reached Cincinnati the next morning.
+There was a tremendous crowd on the wharf, and Barnum was afraid
+that an attempt to repeat the ruse he had played with his
+daughter at New Orleans would not work here, as an account of it
+had been published in the Cincinnati papers, and everyone would
+be suspecting it. But he was fertile in expedients, and quickly
+devised another scheme.
+
+So he took Miss Lind on his arm and boldly started to walk down
+the gang-plank in the face of the crowd. As he did so, Le Grand
+Smith, who was in the plot, called out from the deck of the boat,
+as if he had been one of the passengers, "That's no go, Mr.
+Barnum; you can't pass your daughter off for Jenny Lind this
+time." The remark elicited a peal of merriment from the crowd,
+several persons calling out, "that won't do, Barnum! You may fool
+the New Orleans folks, but you can't come it over the 'Buckeyes.'
+We intend to stay here until you bring out Jenny Lind!" They
+readily allowed him to pass with the lady whom they supposed to
+be his daughter, and in five minutes afterwards the Nightingale
+was complimenting Mr. Coleman upon the beautiful and commodious
+apartments which were devoted to her in the Burnett House.
+
+A concert was given at Wheeling, and another at Pittsburg, and
+then, early in May, the company returned to New York. There they
+gave fourteen concerts, partly at Castle Garden and partly at
+Metropolitan Hall, making ninety-two of the regular series.
+
+Miss Lind now came within the influence of various legal and
+other advisers, who seemed intent on creating trouble between her
+and her manager. Barnum soon discovered this state of affairs,
+but was little troubled by it. Indeed he really hoped that they
+would persuade her to stop at the hundredth concert, for he was
+already worn out with the constant excitement and unremitting
+exertions of the tour. He thought that perhaps it would be well
+for Miss Lind to try giving a few concerts on her own account, or
+under some other manager, in order to disprove what her friends
+had told her, namely, that Mr. Barnum had not managed the
+enterprise as successfully as he might have done.
+
+Accordingly he was much pleased when, after the eighty-fifth
+concert, she told him that she had decided to pay the forfeit of
+$25,000, and terminate the concert tour after the one hundredth
+performance. After the second series of concerts in New York,
+they went to Philadelphia, where Barnum had advertised the
+ninety-third and ninety-fourth concerts. As he did not care
+enough for the probable profits of the last seven of the hundred
+concerts to run the risk of disturbing the very friendly
+relations which had so far existed between him and Miss Lind, he
+now offered to relinquish the engagement, if she desired it, at
+the end of the ninety-third concert. The only terms he required
+were that she would allow him $1,000 for each of the remaining
+seven concerts, besides the $25,000 forfeit already agreed upon.
+She accepted this offer, and the engagement was forthwith ended.
+
+After parting with Barnum, Miss Lind gave a number of concerts,
+with varied success. Then she went to Niagara Falls for a time,
+and afterward to Northampton, Massachusetts. While living at the
+latter place she visited Boston, and was there married to Otto
+Goldschmidt. He was a German composer and pianist, who had
+studied music with her in Germany, and to whom she had long been
+much attached. He had, indeed, travelled with her and Barnum
+during a portion of their tour, and had played at several of the
+concerts.
+
+After the end of their engagement, Barnum and Miss Lind met on
+several occasions, always in the friendliest manner. Once, at
+Bridgeport, she complained rather bitterly to him of the
+unpleasant experiences she had had since leaving him. "People
+cheat me and swindle me very much," said she, "and I find it very
+annoying to give concerts on my own account."
+
+"I was always," said Mr. Barnum, sometime afterward, "supplied
+with complimentary tickets when she gave concerts in New York,
+and on the occasion of her last appearance in America I visited
+her in her room back of the stage, and bade her and her husband
+adieu, with my best wishes. She expressed the same feeling to me
+in return. She told me she should never sing much, if any more,
+in public; but I reminded her that a good Providence had endowed
+her with a voice which enabled her to contribute in an eminent
+degree to the enjoyment of her fellow beings, and if she no
+longer needed the large sums of money which they were willing to
+pay for this elevating and delightful entertainment, she knew by
+experience what a genuine pleasure she would receive by devoting
+the money to the alleviation of the wants and sorrows of those
+who needed it."
+
+"Ah! Mr. Barnum," she replied, "that is very true; and it would
+be ungrateful in me to not continue to use, for the benefit of
+the poor and lowly, that gift which our kind Heavenly Father has
+so graciously bestowed upon me. Yes, I will continue to sing so
+long as my voice lasts, but it will be mostly for charitable
+objects, for I am thankful to say that I have all the money which
+I shall ever need."
+
+It is pleasant to add that this noble resolution was carried out.
+A large proportion of the concerts which she gave after her
+return to Europe and during the remainder of her entire public
+career, were devoted to objects of charity. If she consented, for
+example, to sing for a charitable object in London, the fact was
+not advertised at all, but the tickets were readily disposed of
+in private for from $5 to $10 each.
+
+As for Mr. Barnum, he was glad to enjoy a season of rest and
+quiet after such an arduous campaign. After leaving Miss Lind, in
+Philadelphia, therefore, he went to Cape May for a week and then
+to his home Iranistan, where he spent the remainder of the
+summer.
+
+It is interesting, as a matter of record, to review at this
+point, the financial results of this notable series of concerts.
+The following recapitulation is entirely accurate, being taken
+from Mr. Barnum's own account books:
+
+JENNY LIND CONCERTS.
+
+TOTAL RECEIPTS, EXCEPTING OF CONCERTS DEVOTED TO CHARITY.
+----
+New York ..............  $17,864.05
+  "      ..............   14,203.03
+                       -----------
+No. 1.  "................ 12,519.59
+    2.  "................ 14,266.09
+    3.  "................ 12,174.74
+    4.  "................ 16,028.39
+    5. Boston............ 16,479.50
+    6.  "................ 11,848.62
+    7.  "................  8,639 92
+    8.  "................ 10,169.25
+    9. Providence........  6,525.54
+   10. Boston............ 10,524.87
+   11.  "................  5,240.00
+   12.  "................  7,586.00
+   13. Philadelphia......  9,291.25
+   14.  "................  7,547.00
+   15.  "................  8,458.65
+   16. New York..........  6,415.90
+   17.  "................  4,009.70
+   18.  "................  5,982.00
+   19.  "................  8,007.10
+   20.  "................  6,334.20
+   21.  "................  9,429.15
+   22.  "................  9,912.17
+   23.  "................  5,773.40
+   24.  "................  4,993.50
+   25.  "................  6,670.15
+   26.  "................  9,840.33
+   27.  "................  7,097.15
+   28.  "................  8,263.30
+   29.  "................ 10,570.25
+   30.  "................ 10,646.45
+   31. Philadelphia......  5,480.75
+   32.  "................  5,728.65
+   33.  "................  3,709.88
+   34.  "................  4,815.48
+   35. Baltimore.........  7,117.00
+   36.  "................  8,357.05
+   37.  "................  8,406.50
+   38.  "................  8,121.33
+   39. Washington City...  6,878.55
+   40.  "................  8,507.05
+   41. Richmond.......... 12,385.21
+   42. Charleston........  6,775.00
+   43.  "................  3,653.75
+   44. Havana............  4,666.17
+   45.  "................  2,837.92
+   46. Havana............  2,931.95
+   47. New Orleans....... 12,599.85
+   48.  "................ 10,210.42
+   49.  "................  8,131.15
+   50.  "................  6,019.85
+   51.  "................  6,644.00
+   52.  "................  9,720.80
+   53.  "................  7,545.50
+   54.  "................  6,053.50
+   55.  "................  4,850.25
+   56.  "................  4,495.35
+   57   "................  6,630.35
+   58.  "................  4,745.10
+   59. Natchez...........  5,000.00
+   60. Memphis...........  4,539.56
+   61. St. Louis.........  7,811.85
+   62.  "................  7,961.92
+   63.  "................  7,708.70
+   64.  "................  4,086.50
+   65.  "................  3,044.70
+   66. Nashville.........  7,786.30
+   67.  "................  4,248.00
+   68. Louisville........  7,833.90
+   69.  "................  6,595.60
+   70.  "................  5,000.00
+   71. Madison...........  3,693.25
+   72. Cincinnati........  9,339.75
+   73.  "................ 11,001.50
+   74.  "................  8,446.30
+   75.  "................  8,954.18
+   76.  "................  6,500.40
+   77. Wheeling..........  5,000.00
+   78. Pittsburg.........  7,210.58
+   79. New York..........  6,858.42
+   80.  "................  5,453.00
+   81.  "................  5,463.70
+   82.  "................  7,378.35
+   83.  "................  7,179.27
+   84.  "................  6,641.00
+   85.  "................  6,917.13
+   86. New York..........  6,642.04
+   87.  "................  3,738.75
+   88.  "................  4,335.28
+   89.  "................  5,339.23
+   90.  "................  4,087.03
+   91.  "................  5,717.00
+   92.  "................  9,525.80
+   93. Philadelphia......  3,852.75
+
+Of Miss Lind's half receipts of the first two Concerts she
+devoted $10,000 to charity in New York. She afterwards gave
+Charity Concerts in Boston, Baltimore, Charleston, Havana, New
+Orleans, New York and Philadelphia, and donated large sums for
+the like purposes in Richmond, Cincinnati and elsewhere. There
+were also several Benefit Concerts, for the Orchestra, Le Grand
+Smith, and other persons and objects.
+
+RECAPITULATION.
+
+New York  35 Concerts. Receipts, $286,216.64 Average, $8,177.50
+
+Philadelphia   8    " "          48,884,41 "   6,110 55
+Boston         7    " "          70,388.16 "   10,055.45
+Providence     1    " "           6,525.54 "   6,525.54
+Baltimore      4    " "          32,101.83 "   8,000.47
+Washington     2    " "          15,385 60 "   7,692.80
+Richmond       1    " "          12,385.21 "   12,385.21
+Charleston     2    " "          10,428.75 "    5,214.37
+Havana         3    " "          10,436.04 "    3478.68
+New Orleans   l2    " "          87,646.12 "   7,303.84
+Natchez        1    " "           5,000.00 "   5,000.00
+Memphis        1    " "           4,539.56 "   4,539.56
+St. Louis      5    " "          30,613.67 "   6,122.73
+Nashville      2    " "          12,034 30 "   6,017.15
+Louisville     3    " "          19,429.50 "   6,476.50
+Madison        1    " "           3,693.25 "   3,693.25
+Cincinnati     5    " "          44,242.13 "   8,848.43
+Wheeling       1    " "           5,000.00 "   5,000.00
+Pittsburg      1    " "           7,210.58 "   7,210.58
+
+Total   95 Concerts.  Receipts, $712,161.34  Average, $7,496.43
+
+JENNY LIND'S RECEIPTS.
+
+From the Total Receipts of Ninety-five Concerts.....$712,161.34
+Deduct the receipts of the first two, which, as between P. T.
+Barnum and Jenny Lind were aside from the contract, and are not
+numbered in the table.....32,067.08
+
+Total Receipts of Concerts from No. 1 to No. 93....$680,094.26
+Deduct the Receipts of the 28 Concerts, each of which fell short
+of $5,500.....$123,311.15 Also deduct $5,500 for each of the
+remaining 65 Concerts.........................357,500.00
+480,811.15
+
+Leaving the total excess, as above....$199,283.11 Being equally
+divided, Miss Lind's portion was....$99,641.55 Barnum paid her
+$1,000 for each of the 93 Concerts.....93,000.00 Also one-half
+the receipts of the first two Concerts...16,033.54
+
+Amount paid to Jenny Lind.....................$208,675.09 She
+refunded to Barnum as forfeiture, per contract, in case she
+withdrew after the 100th Concert..........$25,000 She also paid
+him $1,000 each for the seven concerts
+relinquished..........................7,000 $32,000.00
+
+JENNY LIND'S net avails of 95 concerts................$176,675.09
+P. T. BARNUM'S gross receipts, after paying Miss Lind
+....535,486.25
+
+TOTAL RECEIPTS of 95 Concerts $712,161.34
+
+The highest prices paid for tickets were at auction, as follows:
+John N. Genin, in New York, $225; Ossian E. Dodge, in Boston,
+$625; Col. William C. Ross, in Providence, $650; M. A. Root, in
+Philadelphia, $625; Mr. D'Arcy, in New Orleans, $240; a keeper of
+a refreshment saloon in St. Louis, $150; a Daguerrotypist, in
+Baltimore, $100. After the sale of the first ticket the premium
+usually fell to $20, and so downward in the scale of figures. The
+fixed price of tickets ranged from $7 to $3. Promenade tickets
+were from $2 to $1 each.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXII. A FEW SIDE ISSUES.
+
+THE EXPEDITION TO CEYLON--HARNESSING AN ELEPHANT TO A
+PLOW--BARNUM AND VANDERBILT--THE TALKING MACHINE--A FIRE AT
+IRANISTAN--MOUNTAIN GROVE CEMETERY.
+
+The great showman did not allow even so great an enterprise as
+the Jenny Lind concerts to monopolize his attention. In 1849 he
+planned the formation of a great travelling show, combining the
+features of a museum, a menagerie and a circus. In this he
+associated with himself Mr. Seth B. Howes, who was already a
+noted and successful showman, and also Mr. Stratton, the father
+of Tom Thumb. In order to procure a supply of novelties for this
+show they chartered the ship "Regatta," and sent it from New York
+in May, 1850, to Ceylon. The object of this voyage, was to
+procure, either by purchase or by capture, a number of living
+elephants and other wild animals. To make sure of a sufficient
+supply of fodder for them, nearly a thousand tons of hay were
+purchased in New York and taken out aboard the ship. Five hundred
+tons of it were left at the Island of St. Helena, to be taken up
+on the return trip, and a great supply of staves and hoops were
+also left there for the construction of water casks.
+
+This extraordinary mission was successful. In almost exactly a
+year from the day of sailing the ship returned to New York. Its
+novel cargo was unloaded, the ten elephants which had been
+secured were harnessed in pairs to a gigantic chariot, and the
+whole show paraded up Broadway past the Irving House. It was
+reviewed from the window of that hotel by Jenny Lind, who was
+stopping there on her second visit to New York. An elaborate
+outfit of horses, wagons, tents, etc., was added, the whole
+costing over $100,000, and then the show went on the road under
+the nominal leadership of Tom Thumb. It was called, "Barnum's
+Great Asiatic Caravan, Museum and Menagerie;" it travelled about
+the country for four years, and yielded to its proprietors
+enormous profits.
+
+At the end of this tour Barnum sold out the entire establishment,
+including animals, cages, chariots and everything else, excepting
+one elephant. This huge brute he took to his farm at Bridgeport,
+for advertising purposes. It occurred to him that if he should
+keep the animal there for a time and put him to some novel use,
+such as working on the farm, it would set people to talking and
+greatly add to public curiosity and interest in his American
+Museum.
+
+He accordingly took the elephant to Bridgeport and put him in
+charge of a competent keeper, who was dressed in a striking
+Oriental costume. A six acre field close by the New York and New
+Haven railroad track was set apart for their use. Barnum gave the
+keeper a time-table of the road and directed him to make a point,
+whenever trains were passing, always to be busily engaged with
+the elephant at plowing or other agricultural work as close to
+the track as possible. Of course the passengers noticed the
+strange spectacle, items concerning it appeared in the
+newspapers, extending even to the press of foreign lands, and
+thousands of people came from all parts of the country to witness
+the strange sight. Every mail brought numerous letters inquiring
+about it. Many of these were from the officers of agricultural
+societies in all parts of the United States, making serious and
+earnest inquiry as to the utility of the elephant as an
+agricultural animal. These letters were greatly diversified in
+tone, but the substance of their inquires was about as follows:
+
+1. "Is the elephant a profitable agricultural animal?"
+
+2. "How much can an elephant plow in a day?"
+
+3. "How much can he draw?"
+
+4. "How much does he eat?"--this question was invariably asked,
+and was a very important one.
+
+5. "Will elephants make themselves generally useful on a farm?"
+
+6. "What is the price of an elephant?"
+
+7. "Where can elephants be purchased?"
+
+Then would follow a score of other inquiries, such as, whether
+elephants were easily managed; if they would quarrel with cattle;
+if it was possible to breed them; how old calf elephants must be
+before they would earn their own living; and so on indefinitely.
+
+Barnum presently began to be alarmed lest some one should buy an
+elephant and thus share the fate of the man who drew one in a
+lottery and did not know what to do with him. "Accordingly," he
+says, "I had a general letter printed, which I mailed to all my
+anxious inquirers. It was headed 'strictly confidential,' and I
+then stated, begging my correspondents 'not to mention it,' that
+to me the elephant was a valuable agricultural animal, because he
+was an excellent advertisement to my museum; but that to other
+farmers he would prove very unprofitable for many reasons. In the
+first place, such an animal would cost from $3,000 to $10,000; in
+cold weather he could not work at all; in any weather he could
+not earn half his living; he would eat up the value of his own
+head, trunk and body every year; and I begged my correspondents
+not to do so foolish a thing as to undertake elephant farming."
+
+The result of this experiment in advertising was highly
+successful. Newspaper correspondents sent highly colored accounts
+of it all over the world, and numerous pictures of the elephant
+harnessed to a plow appeared in the illustrated papers and
+magazines. After the field had been plowed over fifty or sixty
+times, Barnum concluded that the elephant had been "worked for
+all he was worth," and sold him to Van Amburgh's menagerie.
+
+In 1851 Mr. Barnum became a part owner of the steamship "North
+America," which he proposed to run between America and Ireland as
+a passenger and freight vessel. This idea was presently
+abandoned, and the ship was sent around Cape Horn to San
+Francisco and put into service on the Pacific Mail Line,
+Commodore Cornelius Vanderbilt having purchased a one-half
+interest in it and Mr. Barnum retaining one-third interest in the
+remaining half. After she had made several trips Barnum called
+upon Mr. Vanderbilt at his office and introduced himself. It was
+their first meeting, and this is Barnum's own account of the
+interview:
+
+" 'Is it possible you are Barnum?' exclaimed the Commodore, in
+surprise, 'why, I expected to see a monster, part lion, part
+elephant, and a mixture of rhinoceros and tiger! Is it possible,'
+he continued, 'that you are the showman who has made so much
+noise in the world?'
+
+"I laughingly replied that I was, and added that if I too had
+been governed in my anticipation of his personal appearance by
+the fame he had achieved in his line, I should have expected to
+have been saluted by a steam whistle, and to have seen him
+dressed in a pea jacket, blowing off steam, and crying out 'all
+aboard that's going.'
+
+" 'Instead of which,' replied Mr. Vanderbilt, 'I suppose you have
+come to ask me to walk up to the Captain's office and settle.'
+
+"After this interchange of civilities, we talked about the
+success of the 'North America' in having got safely around the
+Horn, and of the acceptable manner in which she was doing her
+duty on the Pacific side.
+
+" 'We have received no statement of her earnings yet,' said the
+Commodore, 'but if you want money, give your receipt to our
+treasurer, and take some.'
+
+"A few months subsequent to this, I sold out my share in the
+steamship to Mr. Daniel Drew."
+
+Numerous smaller enterprises also marked this stage of Mr.
+Barnum's career. Some of these were connected with his museum,
+while others were entirely independent of it. Thus in 1844, in
+Paris, besides purchasing Robt. Houdin's ingenius automatic
+writer and other costly curiosities for the museum, he had made
+at great expense, a huge panorama of the funeral of Napoleon
+Bonaparte. This gigantic picture showed every event of that
+pageant, beginning with the embarkation of the body at St. Helena
+and ending with its final entombment at the Hotel des Invalides.
+This exhibition, after having had its day at the American Museum,
+was sold, and extensively and profitably exhibited elsewhere.
+While Barnum was in London, during the same year, he engaged a
+company of "Campanalogians, or Lancashire Bell Ringers," then
+performing in Ireland, to make an American tour. They were really
+admirable performers, and by means of their numerous bells of
+various sizes, they produced the most delightful music. They
+attracted much attention in various parts of the United States,
+in Canada, and in Cuba.
+
+After the loss of the bell ringers to the English public Barnum
+secured and sent thither a party of sixteen North American
+Indians, who were widely exhibited. On his return to America
+after his first visit to Europe he engaged an ingenious workman
+to construct an automatic orator. This was a life-size and
+remarkably life-like figure, and when worked from a key-board
+similar to that of a piano it actually uttered words and
+sentences with surprising distinctness. It was exhibited for
+several months in London and elsewhere in England, but though it
+was really a wonderful machine and attracted the earnest
+attention of some people, it was not a popular success. The Duke
+of Wellington visited it several times, and at first he thought
+that the "voice" proceeded from the exhibiter, whom he assumed to
+be a skilful ventriloquist. He was asked to touch the keys with
+his own fingers, and, after some instruction in the method of
+operating, he was able to make the machine speak, not only in
+English but also in German, with which language the Duke seemed
+familiar. Thereafter, he entered his name on the exhibiter's
+autograph book, and certified that the "Automaton Speaker" was an
+extraordinary production of mechanical genius.
+
+Barnum also secured duplicates of the models of machinery
+exhibited at the Royal Polytechnic Institution in London and a
+great many interesting panoramas and pictures. These were all
+exhibited at his museum in New York and afterwards sold to other
+travelling showmen who exhibited them throughout the country. In
+the summer of 1850 he added to the museum his famous Chinese
+collection, including a Chinese family of two men, two "small
+footed" women, and two children.
+
+Few of his curiosities attracted more attention than the
+performances of the "Scotch Boys." One of these was securely
+blindfolded, and then, in answer to questions put by the other,
+accurately described any objects presented by persons who
+attended the surprising exhibition. The mystery, which was merely
+the result of patient practice, consisted wholly in the manner in
+which the question was propounded; in fact, the question
+invariably carried its own answer; for instance:
+
+"What is this?" meant gold; "Now what is this?" silver; "Say,
+what is this?" copper; "Tell me what this is?" iron; "What is the
+shape?" long; "Now, what shape?" round; "Say what shape?" square;
+"Please say what this is," a watch; "Can you tell what is in this
+lady's hand?" a purse; "Now, please say what this is?" a key;
+"Come now, what is this?" money; "How much?" a penny; "Now, how
+much?" sixpence; "Say how much," a quarter of a dollar; "What
+color is this?" black; "Now, what color is this?" red; "Say what
+color?" green; and so on, ad infinitum. To such perfection was
+this brought that it was almost impossible to present any object
+that could not be quite closely described by the blindfolded boy.
+
+In 1850, the celebrated Bateman children acted for several weeks
+at the American Museum, and in June of that year Barnum sent them
+to London with their father and Mr. Le Grand Smith, where they
+played in the St. James Theatre, and afterwards in the principal
+provincial theatres. The elder of these children, Miss Kate
+Bateman, subsequently attained the highest histrionic distinction
+in America and abroad, and reached the head of her profession.
+
+Miss Catharine Hayes and Herr Begnis were engaged by Barnum in
+the fall of 1852 to give a series of sixty concerts in
+California, and the enterprise proved highly profitable, although
+Mr. Barnum intrusted its execution to his agents, not caring
+himself to travel so far. Before she set out for California Miss
+Hayes, with her mother and sister, spent several days at
+Iranistan to attend the marriage of Barnum's eldest daughter,
+Caroline, to Mr. David W. Thompson.
+
+The wedding was to take place in the evening, and on the
+afternoon of that day Mr. Barnum went to Bridgeport to get shaved
+for the occasion. While he was lying in the barber's chair, half
+of his face shaved and the other half covered with lather, his
+prospective son-in-law, Mr. Thompson, drove up to the door of the
+shop and rushed in, exclaiming excitedly, "Mr. Barnum, Iranistan
+is in flames!" Barnum jumped up from the chair and, half shaved
+and with the lather still on his face, jumped into the wagon and
+started for home with the horse on a run. "I was greatly
+alarmed," he afterward said, "for the house was full of visitors
+who had come from a distance to attend the wedding, and all the
+costly presents, dresses, refreshments, and everything prepared
+for a marriage celebration to which nearly a thousand guests had
+been invited, were already in my house. Mr. Thompson told me he
+had seen the flames bursting from the roof, and it seemed to me
+that there was little hope of saving the building.
+
+"My mind was distressed, not so much at the great pecuniary loss
+which the destruction of Iranistan would involve, as at the
+possibility that some of my family or visitors would be killed or
+seriously injured in attempting to save something from the fire.
+Then I thought of the sore disappointment this calamity would
+cause to the young couple, as well as to those who were invited
+to the wedding. I saw that Mr. Thompson looked pale and anxious.
+
+" 'Never mind!' said I; 'we can't help these things; the house
+will probably be burned; but if no one is killed or injured, you
+shall be married to-night, if we are obliged to perform the
+ceremony in the coach-house.'
+
+"On our way, we overtook a fire company, and I implored them to
+'hurry up their machine.' Arriving in sight of Iranistan, we saw
+huge volumes of smoke rolling out from the roof and many men on
+the top of the house were passing buckets of water to pour upon
+the fire. Fortunately, several men had been engaged during the
+day in repairing the roof, and their ladders were against the
+house. By these means and with the assistance of the men employed
+upon my grounds, water was passed very rapidly, and the flames
+were soon subdued without serious damage. The inmates of
+Iranistan were thoroughly frightened; Catherine Hayes and other
+visitors, packed their trunks and had them carried out on the
+lawn; and the house came as near destruction as it well could and
+escape."
+
+While Miss Hayes was at Bridgeport she gave, at Barnum's request,
+a concert for the benefit of "Mountain Grove Cemetery," and the
+large proceeds were devoted to the erection of the stone tower
+and gateway that now adorn the entrance to that beautiful resting
+place of the dead. Barnum had bought the eighty acres of land for
+this cemetery a few years before from several farmers. He had
+been in the habit of tramping over it, gunning, and while thus
+engaged, had observed its admirable fitness for the purposes of a
+cemetery. After the title deeds for the property were secured, it
+was offered for a cemetery, and at a meeting of citizens, several
+lots were subscribed for. enough. indeed, to cover the amount of
+the purchase money. Thus was begun the "Mountain Grove Cemetery,"
+which is now beautifully laid out and adorned with many tasteful
+and costly monuments. Among these are Barnum's own substantial
+granite monument, the family monuments of Harral, Bishop,
+Hubbell, Lyon, Wood, Loomis, Wordin, Hyde, and others, and
+General Tom Thumb erected a tall marble shaft which is surmounted
+by a life-size statue of himself. There is no more charming
+burial-ground in the whole country; yet when the project was
+suggested, many persons preferred an intermural cemetery to this
+rural resting-place for their departed friends; though now all
+concur in considering it fortunate that this adjunct was secured
+to Bridgeport before the land could be permanently devoted to
+other purposes.
+
+Mr. Dion Boucicault also lectured at Bridgeport for the benefit
+of this cemetery and Tom Thumb gave an entertainment for the same
+object. At Barnum's request and under his management, Tom Thumb
+and his wife, and Commodore Nutt and his wife, gave several
+exhibitions and entertainments for the benefit of the Bridgeport
+Charitable Society, the Bridgeport Library, and other local
+institutions.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIII. SOME DOMESTIC ENTERPRISES.
+
+PUTTING A PICKPOCKET ON EXHIBITION--TRAVELLING INCOGNITO--THE
+PEQUONNOCK BANK--THE NEW YORK CRYSTAL PALACE--A POEM ON AN
+INCIDENT AT IRANISTAN.
+
+In the summer of 1853 Alfred Bunn, formerly manager of Drury Lane
+Theatre, London, arrived in Boston. He was then one of the most
+notable figures in the theatrical world. It was he who had made
+the first engagement with Jenny Lind to appear in London. She had
+been induced to break this engagement, however, through the
+solicitations of Mr. Lumley, of Her Majesty's Theatre, with the
+result that Mr. Lumley had to pay to Mr. Bunn heavy damages for
+the breach of contract. Barnum and Bunn had never met, though
+they knew each other well by reputation, and indeed Bunn labored
+under the delusion that he had met Barnum, for soon after his
+arrival he hastened to New York and entered Barnum's private
+office at the Museum with the exclamation, "Well, Barnum, do you
+remember me?"
+
+Barnum was confident that he had never seen him before, and
+indeed did not really know who he was. But, quick as a flash, he
+thought that the ex-manager of Drury Lane must be the only living
+Englishman with presumption enough to accost him in this way. So
+he answered without hesitation, "Why, this is Mr. Bunn, isn't
+it?"
+
+"Ah, my boy," said Bunn, slapping him familiarly on the back, "I
+thought you would remember me. Well, Barnum, how have you been
+since I last saw you?"
+
+Barnum replied in a manner that encouraged his impression that
+they were old acquaintances, and during the next two hours they
+had much gossip about men and affairs in London. Bunn called upon
+Barnum several times after that, and probably never realized that
+Barnum really had been in London two or three years without
+making his acquaintance. When Barnum went to London again in 1858
+he renewed his acquaintance with Bunn and they became great
+chums.
+
+The years 1851, 1852 and 1853 were mostly spent at Bridgeport,
+with frequent visits to New York of a day or two each. In the
+last-named year he resigned the office of President of the
+Fairfield County Agricultural Society, but in accepting his
+resignation the society insisted that it should not go into
+effect until after the annual fair of 1854 His administration of
+the affairs of the society had been very successful, especially
+in relation to the fairs and cattle shows.
+
+The manner in which Barnum turned every circumstance to account
+in the interest of these fairs is well shown in his dealings with
+a pickpocket at the fair of 1853. The man was caught in the act
+of taking a pocket-book from a country farmer, and on arrest was
+found to be a notorious English thief. He had already victimized
+many other visitors to the fair, and there was almost a state of
+panic among the visitors. The fair was to close the next day.
+
+Early the next morning the thief was taken before a justice,
+legally examined, and was bound over for trial. Barnum then
+obtained consent from the Sheriff that the fellow should be put
+on the fair grounds, for the purpose of giving those who had been
+robbed an opportunity of identifying him. For this purpose he was
+handcuffed and placed in a conspicuous position, where of course
+he was "the observed of all observers." Then Barnum papered the
+country round about with handbills, stating that, for the last
+day of the fair, the managers had secured an extraordinary
+attraction. They would, he said, exhibit, safely handcuffed, and
+without extra charge, a live pickpocket, who had on the day
+preceding been caught in the act of robbing an honest farmer.
+Crowds of people rushed in to see the show, parents for miles
+around brought their children to see the awful example of
+iniquity, and great was the profit to the treasury of the fair.
+
+At the close of his presidency in 1854 Barnum was asked to
+deliver the opening speech at the County Fair at Stamford. He did
+so, delivering simply a portion of his lecture on "The Philosophy
+of Humbug." The next morning, as he was being shaved in the
+village barber's shop, which was at the time crowded with
+customers, the ticket-seller to the fair came in. Here is
+Barnum's own account of what followed:
+
+"What kind of a house did you have last night?" asked one of the
+gentlemen in waiting.
+
+"Oh, first-rate, of course. Barnum always draws a crowd," was the
+reply of the ticket-seller, to whom I was not known.
+
+Most of the gentlemen present, however, knew me, and they found
+much difficulty in restraining their laughter.
+
+"Did Barnum make a good speech?" I asked.
+
+"I did not hear it. I was out in the ticket-office. I guess it
+was pretty good, for I never heard so much laughing as there was
+all through his speech. But it makes no difference whether it was
+good or not," continued the ticket-seller, "the people will go to
+see Barnum."
+
+"Barnum must be a curious chap," I remarked.
+
+"Well, I guess he is up to all the dodges."
+
+"Do you know him?" I asked.
+
+"Not personally," he replied; "but I always get into the Museum
+for nothing. I know the doorkeeper, and he slips me in free."
+
+"Barnum would not like that, probably, if he knew it," I
+remarked.
+
+"But it happens he don't know it," replied the ticket-seller, in
+great glee.
+
+"Barnum was on the cars the other day, on his way to Bridgeport,"
+said I, "and I heard one of the passengers blowing him up
+terribly as a humbug. He was addressing Barnum at the time, but
+did not know him. Barnum joined in lustily, and indorsed
+everything the man said. When the passenger learned whom he had
+been addressing, I should think he must have felt rather flat."
+
+"I should think so, too," said the ticket-seller.
+
+This was too much, and we all indulged in a burst of laughter;
+still the ticket-seller suspected nothing. After I had left the
+shop, the barber told him who I was. I called into the
+ticket-office on business several times during the day, but the
+poor ticket-seller kept his face turned from me, and appeared so
+chapfallen that I did not pretend to recognize him as the hero of
+the joke in the barber's shop.
+
+There were many incidents similar to the foregoing in Barnum's
+career. One occurred on board a steamboat, going from New York to
+Bridgeport. As they entered the harbor of the latter city a
+stranger asked the great showman to point out "Barnum's house"
+from the deck. Barnum did so, and then another bystander
+remarked, "I know all about that house, for I did a lot of
+painting there for several months while Barnum was in Europe." He
+went on to say that it was the meanest and worst contrived house
+he ever saw, and added, "It will cost old Barnum a mint of money
+and not be worth two cents after it is finished." "I suppose from
+that that old Barnum didn't pay you very punctually," observed
+Barnum himself. "Oh, yes; he pays promptly every Saturday night,"
+said the other; "there's no trouble about that. He has made half
+a million by exhibiting a little boy whom he took from Bridgeport
+and whom we never thought any great shakes until Barnum took him
+and trained him."
+
+Presently one of the other passengers told this man who Barnum
+was, and nothing more was seen of him.
+
+On another occasion, says Barnum, I went to Boston by the Fall
+River route. Arriving before sunrise, I found but one carriage at
+the depot. I immediately engaged it, and, giving the driver the
+check for my baggage, told him to take me directly to the Revere
+House, as I was in great haste, and enjoined him to take in no
+other passengers, and I would pay his demands. He promised
+compliance with my wishes, but soon afterwards appeared with a
+gentleman, two ladies, and several children, whom he crowded into
+the carriage with me, and, placing their trunks on the
+baggage-rack, started off. I thought there was no use in
+grumbling, and consoled myself with the reflection that the
+Revere House was not far away. He drove up one street and down
+another for what seemed to me a very long time, but I was wedged
+in so closely that I could not see what route he was taking.
+
+After half an hour's drive he halted, and I found we were at the
+Lowell Railway Depot. Here my fellow-passengers alighted, and
+after a long delay the driver delivered their baggage, received
+his fare, and was about closing the carriage door preparatory to
+starting again. I was so thoroughly vexed at the shameful manner
+in which he had treated me, that I remarked:
+
+"Perhaps you had better wait till the Lowell train arrives; you
+may possibly get another load of passengers. Of course my
+convenience is of no consequence. I suppose if you land me at the
+Revere House any time this week, it will be as much as I have a
+right to expect."
+
+"I beg your pardon," he replied, "but that was Barnum and his
+family. He was very anxious to get here in time for the first
+train, so I stuck him for $2, and now I'll carry you to the
+Revere House free."
+
+"What Barnum is it?" I asked.
+
+"The Museum and Jenny Lind man," he replied.
+
+The compliment and the shave both having been intended for me, I
+was of course mollified, and replied, "You are mistaken, my
+friend, _I_ am Barnum."
+
+"Coachee" was thunderstruck, and offered all sorts of apologies.
+
+"A friend at the other depot told me that I had Mr. Barnum on
+board," said he, "and I really supposed he meant the other man.
+When I come to notice you, I perceive my mistake, but I hope you
+will forgive me. I have carried you frequently before, and hope
+you will give me your custom while you are in Boston. I never
+will make such a mistake again."
+
+The Pequonnock Bank of Bridgeport was organized in the spring of
+1851. Barnum had no interest whatever in it, not holding a single
+share of the stock. He was, however, unanimously elected
+President of it. He accepted the office, but as he knew he could
+not devote much time to it, requested that Mr. Hubbell, then
+Mayor of Bridgeport, should be made Vice-President.
+
+Mr. Barnum also invested $20,000, as special partner, in a
+company for the publication of an illustrated weekly newspaper in
+New York. This was The Illustrated News. The first number was
+issued on the 1st of January, 1853, and within a month it had
+seventy thousand circulation. Various complications arose, which
+greatly annoyed Barnum, and at the end of the first year the
+whole concern was sold out without loss.
+
+He was earnestly urged, in February, 1854, to accept the
+presidency of the Universal Exposition, which was held in New
+York in the famous Crystal Palace. At first he positively
+declined. But the matter was persistently urged upon him by many
+influential gentlemen, who represented to him that the success of
+the enterprise depended upon his acceptance of the position. The
+result was that at last he did accept it, and he entered upon its
+duties with all the vigor he could command. The concern was
+almost bankrupt, and to save it from utter ruin Barnum advanced
+large sums of money from his own purse. By this means and by
+various other efforts, such as the re-inauguration, the famous
+Jullien concerts, etc., here stored a semblance of prosperity.
+But it was uphill work, and after a time he resigned the
+presidency and abandoned the institution to its fate.
+
+A little incident which occurred at Iranistan, in the winter of
+1852, was observed by a lady from Philadelphia who was visiting
+there at the time. She afterward made it the subject of a poem,
+which Mr. Barnum prized highly. It was as follows:
+
+WINTER BOUQUETS.
+
+AN INCIDENT IN THE LIFE OF AN AMERICAN CITIZEN.
+
+ The poor man's garden lifeless lay
+     Beneath a fall of snow;
+ But Art in costly greenhouses,
+     Keeps Summer in full glow.
+ And Taste paid gold for bright bouquets,
+     The parlor vase that drest,
+ That scented Fashion's gray boudoir,
+     Or bloomed on Beauty's breast.
+
+  A rich man sat beside the fire,
+     Within his sculptured halls;
+ Brave heart, clear head, and busy hand
+     Had reared those stately walls.
+ He to his gardener spake, and said
+     In tone of quiet glee--
+ "I want a hundred fine bouquets--
+    Canst make them, John, for me?
+
+  John's eyes became exceeding round,
+     This question when he heard;
+ He gazed upon his master,
+     And he answered not a word.
+ "Well, John," the rich man laughing said,
+     "If these too many be,
+ What sayest to half the number, man?
+     Canst fifty make for me?"
+
+  Now John prized every flower, as 'twere
+     A daughter or a son;
+ And thought, like Regan--"What the need
+     Of fifty, or of one?"
+ But, keeping back the thought, he said,
+     "I think, sir, that I might;
+ But it would leave my lady's flowers
+     In very ragged plight."
+
+  "Well, John, thy vegetable pets
+     Must needs respected be;
+ We'll halve the number once again--
+    Make twenty-five for me.
+ And hark ye, John, when they are made
+     Come up and let me know;
+ And I'll give thee a list of those
+     To whom the flowers must go,"
+
+  The twenty-five bouquets were made,
+     And round the village sent;
+ And to whom thinkest thou, my friend,
+     These floral jewels went?
+ Not to the beautiful and proud--
+     Not to the rich and gay--
+ Who, Dives-like, at Luxury's feast
+     Are seated every day.
+
+ An aged Pastor, on his desk
+     Saw those fair preachers stand;
+ A Widow wept upon the gift,
+     And blessed the giver's hand.
+ Where Poverty bent o'er her task,
+     They cheered the lonely room;
+ And round the bed where sickness lay,
+     They breathed Health's fresh perfume
+
+  Oh! kindly heart and open hand--
+     Those flowers in dust are trod,
+ But they bloom to weave a wreath for thee,
+     In the Paradise of God.
+ Sweet is the Minstrel's task, whose song
+     Of deeds like these may tell;
+ And long may he have power to give,
+     Who wields that Dower so well!
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIV. THE JEROME CLOCK COMPANY.
+
+FOUNDING EAST BRIDGEPORT--GROWTH OF THE CITY--THE JEROME CLOCK
+BUBBLE--A RUINED MAN--PAYING HONEST DEBTS--DOWN IN THE DEPTHS.
+
+In the year 1851 Mr. Barnum had purchased from William H. Noble,
+of Bridgeport, Conn., the undivided half of his late father's
+homestead--fifty acres of land on the east side of the river,
+opposite the city of Bridgeport. Together they bought the one
+hundred and seventy-four acres adjoining, and laid out the entire
+property in regular streets, and lined them with trees. A
+beautiful grove of eight acres was reserved for a park. This they
+intended for a nucleus of a new city, to be known as East
+Bridgeport.
+
+They then commenced selling alternate lots, at the same price as
+the land had cost them by the acre, always on condition that a
+suitable dwelling-house, store or manufactory should be erected
+on the ground within a year; that every building should be placed
+at a certain distance from the street; that the style of
+architecture should be approved by the sellers; that the grounds
+be inclosed with suitable fences, and that in all respects the
+locality should be kept desirable for respectable residents.
+
+A new foot-bridge was built across the river, connecting the new
+town with the city of Bridgeport, and a public toll-bridge, which
+belonged to Barnum and Noble, was thrown open to the public free.
+They also erected a covered drawbridge at a cost of $16,000,
+which was made free to the public for several years.
+
+They built and leased to a union company of young coach-makers a
+large manufactory, which was one of the first buildings erected
+in the town, and which went into operation on the first day of
+the year 1852.
+
+In addition to the inducements of low prices for the lots, the
+owners advanced one-half, two-thirds, and sometimes all the funds
+to erect buildings, permitting the purchasers to repay them in
+small sums at their own convenience. The town, under such
+favorable auspices, began to develop and to grow with great
+rapidity.
+
+No one of Barnum's schemes had ever interested him as this one
+did. He was willing to listen to any one who thought they had a
+project favorable to the advancement of the new city. It was the
+man's weak spot, and it was this weak spot which was destined to
+be touched once too often.
+
+There was a small clock factory in the town of Litchfield, in
+which Barnum was a stockholder. Thinking always of his beloved
+enterprise, it occurred to him at length that if the Litchfield
+clock company could be transferred to East Bridgeport, it would
+necessarily bring with it numerous families to swell the
+population. A new stock company was formed, under the name of the
+"Terry and Barnum Manufacturing Company," and in 1852 a factory
+was built in East Bridgeport.
+
+It will be seen how recklessly the owners of the site were
+spending money. They looked for their profits wholly from the
+sale of the reserved lots, which they felt sure would bring high
+values.
+
+In 1855 Mr. Barnum was visited by the President of the Jerome
+Clock Company, Mr. Chauncey Jerome, with a proposition that the
+concern, which was reputed to be very wealthy, should be removed
+to East Bridgeport. Negotiations were opened, and at last Barnum
+was offered a transfer of the great manufactory with its seven
+hundred to one thousand employees, if he would lend his name as
+security for $110,000 in aid of the company.
+
+He was shown an official report of the directors of the company,
+exhibiting a capital of $400,000 with a surplus of $187,000. They
+were in need of money to tide over a dull season and a market
+glutted with goods. The company also was represented as being
+extremely loth to dismiss any of their employees, who would
+suffer greatly if their means of livelihood were taken from them.
+The company was reputed to be rich; the President, Mr. Chauncey
+Jerome, had built a church in New Haven, at a cost of $40,000,
+and proposed to present it to a congregation; he had given a
+clock to a church in Bridgeport, and these things showed that he,
+at least, thought he was wealthy. The Jerome clocks were for sale
+all over the world, even in China, where the Celestials were said
+to take out the "movements," and use the cases for little temples
+for their idols, "Thus proving that faith was possible without
+'works,' " as Mr. Barnum said.
+
+Further testimony came in the form of a letter from the cashier
+of one of the New Haven banks, expressing the highest confidence
+in the financial strength of the company. Barnum afterwards
+learned that his correspondent represented a bank which was one
+of the largest creditors of the concern.
+
+Barnum finally agreed to lend the clock company his notes for a
+sum not to exceed $50,000, and to accept drafts to an amount not
+to exceed $60,000. He also received the written guarantee of the
+President, Chauncey Jerome, that in no event should he lose by
+the loan, as he would be personally responsible for the
+repayment. Mr. Barnum was willing that his notes should be taken
+up and renewed an indefinite number of times just so the maximum
+of $110,000 was not exceeded. Upon the representation that it was
+impossible to say exactly when it would be necessary to use the
+notes, Barnum was induced to put his name to several notes for
+$3,000, $5,000 and $10,000, leaving the date of payment blank, it
+being stipulated that the blanks should be filled to make the
+notes payable in five, ten, or even sixty days from date. On the
+other hand, it was agreed that the Jerome Company should exchange
+its stock with the Terry and Barnum stockholders, thus absorbing
+that concern, and unite the whole business in East Bridgeport.
+
+Three months later Barnum's memoranda showed that the entire
+$110,000 had been used. He was then solicited by the New York
+agent of the company for five additional notes for $5,000 each.
+The request was refused unless they would return an equal amount
+of his own cancelled notes, since the agent assured him that they
+were cancelling these notes "every week." The cancelled notes
+were brought him next day and he renewed them. This he did
+afterwards very frequently, until at last his confidence in their
+integrity became so firmly established that he ceased to ask to
+see the notes that had been taken up, but furnished new paper as
+often as it was desired.
+
+But gradually the rumor that the banks were hesitating about
+discounting his paper came to Barnum's ears. Wondering at this,
+he made a few inquiries, which resulted in the startling
+discovery that his notes had never been taken up, as represented
+by the Jerome Company, and that some of the blank-date notes had
+been made payable in twelve, eighteen and twenty-four months.
+Further investigation revealed the fact that he had indorsed for
+the company to the amount of over half a million dollars, and
+that most of the notes had been exchanged for old Jerome Company
+notes due to the banks and other creditors.
+
+Barnum simply went to work, paid every debt he owed in the world,
+and--failed!
+
+The Jerome Company also failed, and in addition to absorbing
+Barnum's fortune, was able to pay only about fifteen per cent. of
+its own obligations. Of course it never removed to East
+Bridgeport at all.
+
+The failure was a nine-days' wonder all over the country. Never
+had Barnum achieved such notoriety. As he expressed it, he was
+taken to pieces, analyzed, put together again, kicked, "pitched
+into," tumbled about, preached to, preached about, and made to
+serve every purpose to which a sensation loving world could put
+him.
+
+Barnum declared that he could stand the abuse, the cooling of
+false friends and even the loss of fortune, but it made him
+furious to read and hear the moralizings over the "instability of
+ill-gotten gains." His fortune, if made quickly, had been
+honestly worked for and honorably acquired, though envious people
+pretended not to believe it.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXV. THE WHEAT AND THE CHAFF.
+
+FALSE AND TRUE FRIENDS--MEETING OF BRIDGEPORT CITIZENS--BARNUM'S
+LETTER--TOM THUMB'S OFFER--SHILLABER'S POEM--BARNUM'S MESSAGE TO
+THE CREDITORS OF THE JEROME CLOCK COMPANY--REMOVAL TO NEW
+YORK--BEGINNING LIFE ANEW AT FORTY-SIX.
+
+But while misfortune reveals a man his foes, it also shows him
+his friends. Barnum was overwhelmed with offers of assistance,
+funds were declared at his disposal, both for the support of his
+family and to re-establish him in business. "Benefits" by the
+score were offered him, and there was even a proposition among
+leading citizens of New York to give a series of benefits.
+
+Every one of these offers Barnum declined on his unvarying
+principle of never accepting a money favor. The following
+correspondence is taken from the New York papers of the time, and
+will show the stand he took in the matter:
+
+                                 NEW YORK, June 2d, 1856.
+
+MR. P. T. BARNUM:
+
+Dear Sir. The financial ruin of a man of acknowledged energy and
+enterprise is a public calamity. The sudden blow, therefore, that
+has swept away, from a man like yourself, the accumulated wealth
+of years, justifies, we think, the public sympathy. The better to
+manifest our sincere respect for your liberal example in
+prosperity, as well as exhibit our honest admiration of your
+fortitude under overwhelming reverses, we propose to give that
+sympathy a tangible expression by soliciting your acceptance of a
+series of benefits for your family, the result of which may
+possibly secure for your wife and children a future home, or at
+least rescue them from the more immediate consequences of your
+misfortune.
+
+Freeman Hunt, E. K. Collins, Isaac V. Fowler, James Phalen,
+Cornelius Vanderbilt, F. B. Cutting, James W. Gerard, Simeon
+Draper, Thomas McElrath, Park Godwin, R. F. Carman, Gen. C. W.
+Sanford, Philo Hurd, President H. R. R.; Wm. Ellsworth, President
+Brooklyn Ins. Co.; George S. Doughty, President Excelsior Ins.
+Co.; Chas. T. Cromwell, Robert Stuyvesant, E. L. Livingston, R.
+Busteed, Wm. P. Fettridge, E. N. Haughwout, Geo. F. Nesbitt,
+Osborne Boardman & Townsend, Charles H. Delavan, I. & C. Berrien,
+Fisher & Bird, Solomon & Hart, B. Young, M. D., Treadwell, Acker
+& Co., St. Nicholas Hotel; John Wheeler, Union Square Hotel; S.
+Leland & Co., Metropolitan Hotel; Albert Clark, Brevoort House;
+H. D. Clapp, Everett House; John Taylor, International Hotel;
+Sydney Hopman, Smithsonian Hotel; Messrs. Delmonico, Delmonico's;
+Geo. W. Sherman, Florence's Hotel; Kingsley & Ainslee, Howard
+Hotel; Libby & Whitney, Lovejoy's Hotel; Howard & Brown, Tammany
+Hall; Jonas Bartlett, Washington Hotel; Patten & Lynde, Pacific
+Hotel; J. Johnson, Johnson's Hotel, and over 1,000 others.
+
+To this gratifying communication he replied as follows:
+
+                 LONG ISLAND, Tuesday, June 3d, 1856.
+
+GENTLEMEN: I can hardly find words to express my gratitude for
+your very kind proposition. The popular sympathy is to me far
+more precious than gold, and that sympathy seems in my case to
+extend from my immediate neighbors, in Bridgeport, to all parts
+of our Union.
+
+Proffers of pecuniary assistance have reached me from every
+quarter, not only from friends, but from entire strangers. Mr.
+Wm. E. Burton, Miss Laura Keene, and Mr. Wm. Niblo have in the
+kindest manner tendered me the receipts of their theatres for one
+evening, Mr. Gough volunteered he proceeds of one of his
+attractive lectures; Mr. James Phalon generously offered me the
+free use of the Academy of Music; many professional ladies and
+gentlemen have urged me to accept their gratuitous services. I
+have, on principle, respectfully declined them all, as I beg,
+with the most grateful acknowledgments (at least for the
+present), to decline yours--not because a benefit, in itself, is
+an objectionable thing, but because I have ever made it a point
+to ask nothing of the public on personal grounds, and should
+prefer, while I can possibly avoid that contingency, to accept
+nothing from it without the honest conviction that I had
+individually given it in return a full equivalent.
+
+While favored with health, I feel competent to earn an honest
+livelihood for myself and family. More than this I shall
+certainly never attempt with such a load of debt suspended in
+terrorem over me. While I earnestly thank you, therefore, for
+your generous consideration, gentlemen, I trust you will
+appreciate my desire to live unhumiliated by a sense of
+dependence, and believe me, sincerely yours,
+                          P. T. BARNUM.
+
+To Messrs. FREEMAN HUNT, E. K. COLLINS, and others.
+
+And with other offers of assistance from far and near, came the
+following from a little gentleman who did not forget his old
+friend and benefactor in the time of trial:
+
+         JONES HOTEL, PHILADELPHIA, May 12th, 1856.
+
+MY DEAR MR. BARNUM: I understand your friends, and that means
+"all creation," intend to get up some benefits for your family.
+Now, my dear sir, just be good enough to remember that I belong
+to that mighty crowd, and I must have a finger (or at least a
+"thumb") in that pie. I am bound to appear on all such occasions
+in some shape, from "Jack the Giant killer," Up-stairs, to the
+door-keeper down, whichever may serve you best; and there are
+some feats that I can perform as well as any other man of my
+inches. I have just started out on my Western tour, and have my
+carriage, ponies, and assistants all here, but I am ready to go
+on to New York, bag and baggage, and remain at Mrs. Barnum's
+service as long as I, in a small way, can be useful. Put me into
+any "heavy" work, if you like. Perhaps I can not lift as much as
+some other folks, but just take your pencil in hand and you will
+see I can draw a tremendous load. I drew two hundred tons at a
+single pull to-day, embracing two thousand persons, whom I hauled
+up safely and satisfactorily to all parties, at one exhibition.
+Hoping that you will be able to fix up a lot of magnets that will
+attract all New York, and volunteering to sit on any part of the
+loadstone, I am, as ever, your little but sympathizing friend,
+                           GEN. TOM THUMB.
+
+All the prominent papers published editorials and paragraphs full
+of sympathy for the great man's misfortune, the Saturday Evening
+Gazette of Boston breaking out in the following poem.
+
+BARNUM REDIVIVUS.
+
+A WORD FOR BARNUM.
+
+ BARNUM, your hand! Though you are "down,"
+     And see full many a frigid shoulder,
+ Be brave, my brick, and though they frown,
+     Prove that misfortune makes you bolder.
+ There's many a man that sneers, my hero,
+     And former praise converts to scorning,
+ Would worship--when he fears--a Nero,
+     And bend "where thrift may follow fawning."
+
+  You humbugged us--that we have seen,
+     WE GOT OUR MONEY'S WORTH, old fellow,
+ And though you thought our MINDS were GREEN,
+     We never thought your HEART was YELLOW.
+ We knew you liberal, generous, warm,
+     Quick to assist a falling brother,
+ And, with such virtues, what's the harm
+     All memories of your faults to smother?
+
+  We had not heard the peerless Lind,
+     But for your spirit enterprising,
+ You were the man to raise the wind,
+     And make a coup confessed surprising.
+ You're reckoned in your native town
+     A friend in need, a friend in danger,
+ You ever keep the latch-string down,
+     And greet with open hand the stranger.
+
+  Stiffen your upper lip. You know
+     Who are your friends and who your foes now;
+ We pay for knowledge as we go;
+     And though you get some sturdy blows now,
+ You've a fair field--no favors crave--
+     The storm once passed will find you braver--
+ In virtue's cause long may you wave,
+     And on the right side, never waver.
+
+The editor of the paper was Mr. B. P. Shillaber, better known as
+"Mrs. Partington," and to him Barnum years later wrote to find
+out the author of this effusion. Mr. Shillaber replied as
+follows:
+                             CHELSEA, April 25th, 1868.
+
+MY DEAR MR. BARNUM: The poem in question was written by A.
+Wallace Thaxter, associate editor with Mr. Clapp and myself, on
+the Gazette--since deceased, a glorious fellow--who wrote th poem
+from a sincere feeling of admiration for yourself. Mr. Clapp
+(Hon. W. W. Clapp) published it with his full approbation. I
+heard of your new trouble, in my sick chamber, where I have been
+all winter, with regret, and wish you as ready a release from
+attending difficulty as your genius has hitherto achieved under
+like circumstances.
+                   Yours, very truly
+                                 B. F. SHILLABER.
+
+The manifestations of sympathy from his fellow-citizens in
+Bridgeport gratified Barnum more than all the rest. The Mayor
+headed and more than 300 leading citizens signed a call for a
+mass meeting of sympathy.
+
+At the hour appointed for the meeting a large assemblage crowded
+Washington Hall, the principal hall of the city. Many people
+thronged the door, unable to gain entrance.
+
+Mr. Charles B. Hubbell, President of the Pequonnock Bank, was
+appointed President; Messrs. Charles Foote, Cashier of the
+Connecticut Bank; Stephen Tomlinson, President of the Farmers'
+Bank; Samuel F. Hurd, President of the Bridgeport City Bank,
+Hanford Lyon, Dwight Morris, E. Ferris Bishop, A. P. Houston, and
+Wm. H. Noble, Vice-Presidents, and Messrs. Samuel M. Chesney and
+Julius L. Hanover, Secretaries.
+
+Mr. Dwight Morris said that they had met for the purpose of
+expressing their sympathy with their former fellow-citizen, P. T.
+Barnum, in his pecuniary reverses. It was well known how much Mr.
+Barnum had done for Bridgeport. He had expended large sums to
+build up their city, had accommodated many of them with the means
+of securing themselves homes, and it was principally to him that
+they owed their present beautiful resting-place for the dead.
+[Applause.] The citizens of Bridgeport hoped that his misfortunes
+would soon pass away, and that he would ere long resume his
+position in Bridgeport, and among the citizens of Fairfield
+County. [Prolonged applause.]
+
+Mr. Wm. H. Noble read the following resolutions.
+
+WHEREAS, Our late neighbor and friend, P. T. Barnum, has become
+involved in financial misfortune which seems likely to be
+irretrievable, and to prevent his again residing in our
+vicinity--Resolved, That we as citizens of Bridgeport deem it an
+act of justice no less than a slight return for the many acts of
+liberality, philanthropy, and public spirit in our midst, which
+have marked his prosperity, to offer him our tribute of respect
+and sympathy in this the hour of his trouble.
+
+Resolved, That in his intercourse with us in the private and
+social relations of life, Mr. Barnum is remembered as a man of
+upright dealings and honorable sentiments--a kind and genial
+neighbor, and exemplary character, a beneficent philanthropist,
+and a most generous friend.
+
+Resolved, That in his more extended capacity as a citizen he has
+enduringly associated his name with numerous objects, which
+remain as monuments among us, connected with the institutions of
+religion, education, and commercial prosperity--with the
+advancement of the mechanical, agricultural, and other useful
+arts and sciences--with the spirit of public improvement and
+public morals; and that so long as these remain to us matters of
+interest, we shall never forget that he has been of them all
+among the foremost, most liberal, and most efficient promoters.
+
+Resolved, That we hereby express to him our heartfelt sympathy in
+his misfortunes, our unshaken confidence in his integrity, and
+our admiration of the dignified fortitude and composure with
+which he has met the reverses into which he has been dragged,
+through no fault of his own, except a too generous confidence in
+pretended friends, and our earnest hope that he may yet return to
+that wealth which he has so nobly employed and to the community
+he has so signally benefited.
+
+Resolved, That copies of these resolutions, signed by the
+President and other officers of this meeting, be transmitted to
+Mr. Barnum, and also to the press of this city.
+
+Mr. E. B. Goodsell said that Mr. Barnum had been the friend of
+the poor, and his hospitalities had been extended to men of every
+State in the Union. The citizens of Bridgeport should be proud to
+claim as one of their citizens P. T. Barnum. His name was written
+upon every charity in their city, and the temples of God bore its
+impress. By a few fell strokes of an ugly pen, he has been drawn
+into that whirlpool of destruction to himself and almost
+destruction to many in the city. In the midst of his prosperity,
+while he was building up a city on the east side of their little
+harbor, he had fallen by the hand of traitors. He hoped that he
+might survive his misfortunes and come back to live in their
+midst. He did not expect that he could ever return with that
+"pocketful of rocks" which he used to talk so much about; but, if
+he would come, he for one was ready to pledge himself that he
+should never starve in the city of Bridgeport. [Loud and
+prolonged applause.]
+
+Mr. Oakley was loudly called for. He said that he had deep regard
+for Mr. Barnum in his distress. He was one of the very few people
+in Bridgeport who had never received any aid from Mr. Barnum, but
+he was ready to join in any expression of sympathy, and saw no
+reason why it should not assume a material form [loud applause].
+He would only allude to Mr. Barnum's unostentatious benevolence.
+To one of the churches of the city Mr. Barnum gave $500--to one
+of their churches in which he felt no interest beyond his
+interest for Bridgeport, and this was but a specimen of his
+munificence. Nobody could say that Mr. Barnum had not made the
+best and most benevolent use of his money [Applause]. He had been
+the means of adding a large number to the population of
+Bridgeport. He never yet had found a man who was more eminently
+the friend of the poor man than P. T. Barnum [Cheers]. He had
+alleviated the sufferings of many a broken heart, and he had
+aided many a young man to start in business. If Mr. Barnum had
+erred, it was only an error of judgment [Cheers]. He sympathized
+with Mr. Barnum. He had talents which would cope with those of
+most of the human race. He did not believe that there was a man
+in the city who had so little soul as to begrudge a tear to him
+in his misfortune [loud applause]. They should at least send him
+assurance that there were thousands of hearts in his own city
+which appreciated his noble benevolence, and loved and honored
+his character.
+
+Mr. Noble read the following letter from Mr. Barnum:
+
+                       "NEW YORK, April 25th, 1856.
+"DEAR SIR: I have just received a slip containing a call for a
+public meeting of the citizens of Bridgeport, to sympathize with
+me in my trouble. It is headed by his Honor the Mayor, and is
+signed by most of our prominent citizens, as well as by many more
+who by hard labor earn their daily bread, and who appreciate a
+calamity which at a single blow strips a man of his fortune, his
+dear home, and all the worldly comfort which years of diligent
+labor has acquired. It is due to truth to say that I knew nothing
+of this movement until your letter informed me of it. In
+misfortune, the true sympathy of neighbors is more consoling and
+precious than anything which money can purchase. This voluntary
+offering of my fellow-citizens, though it thrills me with painful
+emotions and causes tears of gratitude, yet it imparts renewed
+strength and fills my heart with thankfulness to Providence for
+raising up to my sight, above all this wreck, kind hearts which
+soar above the sordid atmosphere of 'dirty dollars.' I can never
+forget this unexpected kindness from my old friends and
+neighbors. I trust I am not blind to my many faults and
+shortcomings; I, however, do feel great consolation in believing
+that I never used money or position to oppress the poor or wrong
+my fellowmen, and that I never turned empty away whom I had the
+power to assist. My poor sick wife, who needs the bracing air
+which our dear home (made beautiful by her willing hand) would
+now have afforded her, is driven by the orders of her physician
+to a secluded spot on Long Island, where the sea-wind lends its
+healthful influence, and where I have also retired for the double
+purpose of consoling her and recruiting my own constitution,
+which, through the excitement of the last few months, has most
+seriously failed me. In our quiet and humble retreat that which I
+most sincerely pray for is tranquillity and contentment. I am
+sure that the remembrance of the kindness of my Bridgeport
+friends will aid me in securing these cherished blessings. No man
+who has not passed through similar scenes, can fully comprehend
+the misery which has been crowded into the last few months of my
+life; but I have endeavored to preserve my integrity, and I
+humbly hope and believe that I am being taught humility and
+reliance upon Providence, which will yet afford a thousand times
+more peace and true happiness than can be acquired in the dire
+strife and turmoil, excitements and struggles of this
+money-worshiping age. The man who coins his brain and blood into
+gold, who wastes all of his time and thought upon the almighty
+dollar, who looks no higher than blocks of houses and tracts of
+lands, and whose iron chest is crammed with stocks and mortgages,
+tied up with his own heart-strings, may console himself with the
+idea of safe investments; but he misses a pleasure which I firmly
+believe this lesson was intended to secure to me, and which it
+will secure, if I can fully bring my mind to realize its wisdom.
+I think I hear you say,
+
+When the devil was sick,
+The devil a saint would be,
+But when the devil got well,
+The devil a saint was he.'
+
+"Granted, but after all the man who looks upon the loss of money
+as anything compared to the loss of honor, or health, or
+self-respect, or friends; a man who can find no source of
+happiness except in riches, is to be pitied for his blindness. I
+certainly feel that the loss of money, of home and my home
+comforts, is dreadful; that to be driven again to find a resting
+place away from the friends that I loved, and from where I had
+fondly hoped I was to end my days. And when I had lavished time,
+money, and everything to make my descent to the grave placid and
+pleasant, is indeed a severe lesson; but after all I firmly
+believe it is for the best, and though my heart may break I will
+not repine. I regret, beyond expression, that any man should be a
+loser for having trusted to my name; it would not have been so if
+I had not myself been deceived. As it is, I am gratified in
+knowing that all my individual obligations will be met. It would
+have been much better if clock creditors had accepted the best
+offers that it was in my power to make them. But it was not so to
+be, it is now too late, and as I willingly give up all I possess,
+I can do no more. Wherever my future lot may be cast, I shall
+ever fondly cherish the kindness which I have always received
+from the citizens of Bridgeport. I am, my dear sir,
+                              "Truly yours, P. T. BARNUM."
+
+The reading of the letter excited much sensation, applause, and
+laughter.
+
+The resolutions were re-read and passed unanimously.
+
+Mr. William Bishop said it was unusual for citizens to meet
+together to express sympathy with one who had lost his fortune.
+It was very common for the people and the press to eulogize a man
+when he was beyond the reach of human sympathy. He thought it was
+far better to tender a man the marks of approval while he was yet
+alive and could appreciate it. [Applause] For along time in this
+city they were accustomed to bury their dead among the living.
+Mr. Barnum had done more than any other man to secure to this
+city the most beautiful-cemetery in Connecticut. He alone had
+secured to the city what it had never had before--a public
+square. On the east side of the river he had almost completed a
+school-house, a thing which could be said of no other man. [Loud
+cheering.] If material aid were needed, he should be proud to
+assist in raising it. There was one clause in the resolutions
+which he did not believe. He did not believe that "in all
+probability he could ever retrieve" his fortune. [Prolonged
+cheering.]
+
+Mr. J. E. Dunham made a brief but earnest speech. He hoped this
+meeting would put down the sneers which were in circulation in
+relation to Mr. Barnum's sincerity, by showing that those
+estimated him most who knew him best.
+
+Mr. Nathaniel Greene and Mr. Bowles made short but effective
+speeches.
+
+The meeting was characterized throughout by the greatest
+enthusiasm, and adjourned with three loud cheers for Barnum.
+
+Nor was sympathy all his neighbors offered him; shortly after
+this meeting a number of gentlemen in Bridgeport offered him a
+loan of $50,000, if that sum would meet the exigency.
+
+Little by little the magnitude of the fraud practiced upon
+Barnum's too confiding nature dawned upon him. Not only had his
+notes been used to five times the amount stipulated, but the
+money had been applied, not to relieving the temporary
+embarrassment of the company, but almost entirely to the
+redemption of the old claims of years gone by. Barnum sent two of
+his friends to New Haven to ask for a meeting of the creditors,
+authorizing them to say for him in substance:
+
+"GENTLEMEN: This is a capital practical joke! Before I negotiated
+with your clock company at all, I was assured by several of you,
+and particularly by a representative of the bank which was the
+largest creditor of the concern, that the Jerome Company was
+eminently responsible, and that the head of the same was
+uncommonly pious. On the strength of such representations solely,
+I was induced to agree to indorse and accept paper for that
+company to the extent of $110,000--no more. That sum I am now
+willing to pay for my own verdancy, with an additional sum of
+$40,000 for your 'cuteness, making a total of $150,000, which you
+can have if you cry 'quits' with the fleeced showman and let him
+off."
+
+Many of the old creditors favored this proposition; but it was
+found that the indebtedness was so scattered it would be
+impracticable to attempt a settlement by an unanimous compromise
+of the creditors.
+
+Barnum therefore turned over his Bridgeport property to
+Connecticut assignees, moved his family to New York, and made an
+assignment there of all his other property, real estate and
+personal effects.
+
+About this time he received a letter from Philadelphia proffering
+the loan of $500 in case he really was in need. The wording of
+the letter made Barnum suspicious that it was a trick to
+ascertain whether he really had any property or if he made an
+honest settlement to the best of his ability. To this letter
+Barnum replied that he did need $500, and as he had expected the
+money never came.
+
+But the Philadelphia banks which were holding the Jerome paper
+for a higher percentage, at once acceded to the terms which Mr.
+Barnum had announced himself able to pay,
+
+Every dollar which he owed on his own account he had already
+paid, and for the liabilities incurred by the swindle which had
+involved him he offered such a percentage which he thought his
+estate, when sold, would eventually pay. Mrs. Barnum also gave up
+certain portions of her own property to redeem such notes as
+could be secured upon these terms.
+
+They went to live in a hired furnished house in New York, the
+landlady and her family boarding with them. At forty-six Barnum
+found himself once more at the foot of the ladder--beginning life
+anew.
+
+"The situation is disheartening," he said, "but I have
+experience, energy, health, and hope."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVI. IDLENESS WITHOUT REST.
+
+ANNOYING PERSECUTIONS OF CREDITORS--SUMMER ON LONG ISLAND--THE
+BLACK WHALE PAYS THE BOARD BILL--THE WHEELER & WILSON COMPANY
+REMOVE TO EAST BRIDGEPORT--SETTING SAIL FOR ENGLAND.
+
+In the summer of 1855 Barnum had sold the American Museum to
+Messrs. John Greenwood, Jr., and Henry D. Butler. They paid
+nearly twice as much for the collection as it had originally
+cost, giving notes for nearly the entire amount, securing the
+notes by a chattel mortgage, and hiring the premises from Mrs.
+Barnum, who owned the Museum property lease, and on which, by
+agreement of the lessees, she realized something like $19,000 a
+year. The chattel mortgage was, of course, turned over to the New
+York assignees with the other property.
+
+Barnum's widespread reputation for shrewdness was, in his present
+difficulties, destined to be the cause of considerable annoyance
+to him. Certain outside creditors who had bought clock notes at a
+tremendous discount, believing that Barnum's means were still
+ample, made up their minds that they must be paid at once without
+waiting for the sale of the property by assignees.
+
+They, therefore, took what is known as "supplementary
+proceedings," by which is meant an examination before a judge,
+compelling the debtor to disclose, under oath, everything in
+regard to his property, his present means of living, and so on.
+
+"Putting Barnum through a course of sprouts," as they expressed
+it, came to be a very frequent occurrence. One creditor after
+another hauled him up, and the attorneys would ask the same
+questions which had already been answered a dozen times.
+
+This persistent and unnecessary annoyance created a great deal of
+sympathy for the man, the papers took his part, and even the
+judges before whom he appeared, personally sided with him,
+although they were obliged to administer the law. After a while,
+the judges ruled that he need not answer any questions propounded
+by an attorney, if he had already answered the same question in
+any previous examination.
+
+In fact, one of the judges lost all patience on one occasion, and
+said sharply to the examining attorney:
+
+"This, sir, has become simply a case of persecution. Mr. Barnum
+has many times answered every question that can properly be put
+to him, to elicit the desired information; and I think it is time
+to stop these examinations. I advise him not to answer one
+interrogatory which he has replied to under any previous
+inquiries.
+
+One consequential little lawyer commenced his examination in
+behalf of a note-shaver, who held a thousand dollar note which he
+had bought for seven hundred. After the oath had been
+administered, he arranged his pen, ink, and paper, and in a loud
+tone of voice asked:
+
+"What is your name, sir?"
+
+The answer was given, and the next question delivered in a
+louder, more peremptory tone was:
+
+"What is your business?"
+
+"Attending bar," answered Barnum.
+
+"Attending bar!" exclaimed the lawyer; "attending bar! Why, I
+thought you were a teetotaler."
+
+"So I am," declared the witness.
+
+"And yet, sir, you have the audacity to assert that you peddle
+rum all day, and drink none yourself?"
+
+"That is not a relevant question," said Barnum.
+
+"I will appeal to his Honor the Judge if you don't answer it
+instantly," said the lawyer, gleefully.
+
+"Very well; I do attend bar, and yet never drink intoxicating
+liquors."
+
+"Where do you attend bar, and for whom?" pursued the lawyer.
+
+"I attend the bar of this court nearly every day, for the benefit
+of two-penny lawyers and their greedy clients," replied the
+disgusted Barnum.
+
+On another occasion a young lawyer who had been pushing his
+inquiries to a great length, said in a half-laughing tone of
+apology:
+
+"You see, Mr. Barnum, I am searching after the small thing; I am
+willing to take even the crumbs that fall from the rich man's
+table."
+
+"Which are you, then, Lazarus or one of the dogs?" asked Barnum,
+wearily.
+
+"I guess a blood-hound would not smell out much on this trial,"
+returned the lawyer, good-naturedly, adding that he had no more
+questions to ask.
+
+On account of Mrs. Barnum's continued ill-health, the family
+spent the summer in a farm-house at Westhampton, Long Island. The
+farm lay close to the ocean, and the place was very cool and
+delightful. The respite from active life, and the annoyance
+attendant to his financial troubles was of the greatest benefit
+to Mr. Barnum, who spent the time shooting, fishing, and driving.
+
+One morning they discovered that the waves had thrown up on the
+beach a young black whale, nearly twelve feet long. The animal
+was dead, but still hard and fresh, and Barnum bought it for a
+few dollars from the man who claimed it by right of discovery. He
+sent it at once to the Museum, where it was exhibited in a huge
+refrigerator for a few days, where crowds came to see it. The
+managers very properly gave Barnum a share of the profits, which
+amounted to a sum sufficient to pay the board-bill of the family
+for the entire season.
+
+"Well," said the amazed landlord, when he heard of it, "you do
+beat all for luck. Here you come and board for four months with
+your family, and when the time is nearly up and you're getting
+ready to leave, out rolls a big black whale on our beach, a thing
+never heard of before in this vicinity, and you take that whale
+and pay your board-bill with it!"
+
+Shortly after his return to New York an unforeseen event occurred
+which Barnum realized was likely to extricate him from his
+difficulties.
+
+The new city which had led him into ruin now promised to be his
+redemption.
+
+The now gigantic Wheeler & Wilson Sewing-Machine Company was then
+doing a comparatively small yet rapidly growing business at
+Watertown, Connecticut. The Terroy & Barnum clock factory was
+standing idle, almost worthless, in East Bridgeport, and Wheeler
+& Wilson saw in the empty building, the situation, the ease of
+communication with New York, and other advantages, precisely what
+they wanted, provided they could procure the premises at a rate
+which would compensate them for the expense and trouble of
+removing their establishment from Watertown. The clock factory
+was sold for a trifle and the wheeler & Wilson Company moved into
+it and speedily enlarged it.
+
+This important occurrence gave Barnum great hope for the
+increased value of the land belonging to his estate. And moreover
+Mr. Wheeler offered him a loan of $5,000 without security, which
+sum Barnum accepted, and devoted it, together with Mrs. Barnum's
+money, to purchasing the East Bridgeport property at the
+assignees' sale and also taking up such clock notes as could be
+purchased at a reasonable percentage. Though this new plan did
+eventually result in putting more money in his pocket than the
+Jerome complication had taken out, yet the process was a slow
+one. But Barnum concluded to let it work itself out, and
+meanwhile, with the idea of doing something to help out the
+accumulation and even saving something to add to the amount, he
+made up his mind to go to Europe again.
+
+He set sail in 1857, taking with him Tom Thumb and little
+Cordelia Howard, who had attained celebrity for her artistic
+rendering of juvenile characters,
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVII. A PROSPEROUS EXILE.
+
+HIS SUCCESSFUL PUPIL--MAKING MANY FRIENDS IN LONDON--ACQUAINTANCE
+WITH THACKERAY--A COMEDY OF ERRORS IN A GERMAN CUSTOM
+HOUSE--ARISTOCRATIC PATRONAGE AT FASHIONABLE RESORTS--BARNUM'S
+IMPRESSIONS OF HOLLAND AND THE DUTCH.
+
+Years ago Barnum had known Albert Smith in London as a dentist,
+literary "hack," occasional writer for Punch and various
+magazines, etc., not achieving notable success in any of these
+undertakings. He now found him the most eminent and successful
+showman in the city, occupying Barnum's old quarters in Egyptian
+Hall. The chief attraction of his show was a panorama of Mont
+Blanc, accompanying which he gave a lecture, descriptive of the
+mountain and relating his own experiences in climbing it. When
+Barnum called upon him he found him just as unassuming and
+cordial as ever; he was forthwith entered on the free list at all
+of Smith's entertainments, and the two often dined together at
+the Garrick Club.
+
+The first time Barnum attended Smith's exhibition, the latter
+gave him a sly wink from the stage at the moment of his
+describing a scene in the golden chamber of St. Ursula's church
+in Cologne, where the old sexton narrating the story of the ashes
+and bones to the eleven thousand innocent virgins, who, according
+to tradition, were sacrificed on a certain occasion. One of the
+characters whom he pretended to have met several times on his
+trip to Mont Blanc, was a Yankee, whom he named "Phineas
+Cutecraft." The wink came at the time he introduced Phineas in
+the Cologne church, and made him say at the end of the sexton's
+story about the virgins' bones:
+
+"Old fellow, what will you take for that hull lot of bones? I
+want them for my museum in America!"
+
+When the question had been interpreted to the old German, he
+exclaimed in horror, according to Albert Smith:
+
+"Mine Gott! it is impossible! We will never sell the virgins'
+bones!"
+
+"Never mind," replied Phineas Cutecraft, "I'll send another lot
+of bones to my museum, swear mine are the real bones of the
+Virgins of Cologne, and burst up your show!"
+
+This always excited the heartiest laughter; but Mr. Smith knew
+very well that Barnum would at once recognize it as a paraphrase
+of the scene wherein they, too, had figured in 1844, at the
+porter's lodge of Warwick Castle. "In the course of the
+entertainment," says Barnum, "I found he had woven in numerous
+anecdotes I had told him at that time, and many incidents of our
+excursion were also travestied and made to contribute to the
+interest of his description of the ascent of Mont Blanc."
+
+When they dined together at the club that day, Smith introduced
+Barnum to several of his acquaintances as his teacher in the show
+business. He also remarked to Barnum that he must have recognized
+as old friends many of the incidents and jokes in the lecture.
+Barnum replied that he did. "Well," said Smith, "of course you as
+a showman, know very well that, to win popular success. we have
+to appropriate and adapt to our uses everything of the sort that
+we can get hold of."
+
+By thus engrafting his various experiences upon this Mont Blanc
+entertainment, Albert Smith succeeded in serving up a salmagundi
+feast which was relished alike by royal and less distinguished
+palates.
+
+When William Makepeace Thackeray first visited this country, he
+brought a letter of introduction to Barnum, from Albert Smith,
+and called on the showman at his New York museum. He spent an
+hour or more there, asking much advice of Barnum in regard to the
+management of the course of lectures on "The English Humorists of
+the Eighteenth Century," which he proposed to deliver, as he did
+afterwards, with very great success, in the principal cities of
+the Union. Barnum gave him the best advice he could as to
+management, and the cities he ought to visit, for which he was
+very grateful, and he called on Barnum whenever he was in New
+York. Barnum also saw him repeatedly when he came to America the
+second time with his lectures on "The Four Georges," which, it
+will be remembered, he delivered in the United States in the
+season of 1855-56, before he read them to audiences in Great
+Britain. Barnum's relations with this great novelist were cordial
+and intimate; and now, when he called upon him, in 1857, at his
+own house, Thackeray grasped him heartily by the hand, and said:
+
+"Mr. Barnum, I admire you more than ever I have read the accounts
+in the papers of the examinations you underwent in New York
+courts; and the positive pluck you exhibit under your pecuniary
+embarrassments is worthy of all praise. You would never have
+received credit for the philosophy you manifest if these
+financial misfortunes had not overtaken you."
+
+Barnum thanked him for his compliment, and he continued:
+
+"But tell me, Barnum, are you really in need of present
+assistance? For if you are you must be helped."
+
+"Not in the least," the showman replied, laughing "I need more
+money in order to get out of bankruptcy, and I intend to earn it;
+but so far as daily bread is concerned, I am quite at ease, for
+my wife is worth L30,000 or L40,000."
+
+"Is it possible!??" he exclaimed, with evident delight; "well,
+now, you have lost all my sympathy; why, that is more than I ever
+expect to be worth; I shall be sorry for you no more."
+
+During his stay in London, Barnum met Thackeray several times,
+and on one occasion dined with him. He repeatedly expressed his
+obligations to Barnum for the advice and assistance he had given
+him on the occasion of his first lecturing visit to the United
+States.
+
+Soon after Barnum arrived in London he was visited by Mr. Otto
+Goldschmidt, who had married Jenny Lind. They were then living in
+Dresden, but Madame Goldschmidt had insisted on his hurrying over
+to England to see her old manager, and ascertain whether he
+really was in want. Barnum assured him that he was getting on
+comfortably, though he had to exercise economy, and that his
+family would presently come over and live with him in London.
+Goldschmidt urged him to come to Dresden to live. "It is much
+cheaper living there," he said, "and my wife will be so glad to
+find a suitable house for you." But Barnum declined the offer.
+His business prospects would be better in London than in Dresden.
+
+Barnum's old friends, Julius Benedict and Signor Belletti, also
+called on him frequently, and made him feel much at home. Among
+others whom he met in London, some of them quite frequently at
+dinners, were Mr. George Augustus Sala, Mr. Edmund Yates, Mr.
+Horace Mayhew, Mr. Alfred Bunn, Mr Lumley, of Her Majesty's
+Theatre; Mr. Buckstone; of the Haymarket; Mr. Charles Kean, our
+princely countryman; Mr. George Peabody, Mr. J. M. Morris, the
+manager, Mr. Bates, of Baring Brothers & Co.; Mr. Oxenford,
+dramatic critic of the London Times, Dr. Ballard, the American
+dentist, and many other eminent persons.
+
+He had numerous offers from professional friends on both sides of
+the Atlantic, who supposed him to be in need of employment. Mr.
+Barney Williams, who had not then acted in England, proposed, in
+the kindest manner, to make him his agent for a tour through
+Great Britain, and to give him one-third of the profits which he
+and Mrs. Williams might make by their acting. Mr. Pettengill, of
+New York, the newspaper advertising agent, offered him the fine
+salary of $10,000 a year to transact business for him in Great
+Britain. He wrote: "When you failed in consequence of the Jerome
+clock notes, I felt that your creditors were dealing hard with
+you; that they should have let you up and give you a chance, and
+they would have fared better, and I wish I was a creditor, so as
+to show what I would do." These offers, both from Mr. Williams
+and Mr. Pettengill, Barnum felt obliged to decline.
+
+Mr. Lumley, manager of Her Majesty's Theatre, used to send him an
+order for a private box for every opera night, and Barnum
+frequently availed himself of his courtesy.
+
+Meanwhile the showman was by no means idle. Cordelia Howard as
+"Little Eva," with her mother as the inimitable "Topsy," were
+highly successful in London and other large cities, while General
+Tom Thumb, returning after so long an absence, drew crowded
+houses wherever he went. These were strong spokes in the wheel
+that was moving slowly but surely in the effort to get Barnum out
+of debt, and, if possible, to save some portion of his real
+estate. Of course, it was not generally known that he had any
+interest whatever in either of these exhibitions; if it had been,
+possibly some of the clock creditors would have annoyed him; but
+he busied himself in these and in other ways, working
+industriously and making much money, which he constantly remitted
+to his trusty agent at home.
+
+Barnum spent some weeks in London and then went to Germany. He
+was accompanied by Tom Thumb, and they went by the way of Paris,
+Strasburg, and Baden-Baden. At the frontier they had a terrible
+time with the thick-headed customs-inspector. This was at Kehl,
+near Strasburg. "I knew," said Barnum in telling the story, "that
+I had no baggage which was rightfully subject to duty, as I had
+nothing but my necessary clothing, and the package of placards
+and lithographs, illustrating the General's exhibitions. As the
+official was examining my trunks, I assured him in French, that I
+had nothing subject to duty; but he made no reply and
+deliberately handled every article in my luggage. He then cut the
+strings to the large packages of show-bills. I asked him in
+French, whether he understood that language. He gave a grunt,
+which was the only audible sound I could get out of him, and then
+laid my show-bills and lithographs on his scales as if to weigh
+them. I was much excited. An English gentleman, who spoke German,
+kindly offered to act as my interpreter.
+
+" 'Please to tell him,' said I, 'that those bills and lithographs
+are not articles of commerce; that they are simply
+advertisements.'
+
+"My English friend did as I requested; but it was of no use; the
+custom-house officer kept piling them upon his scales. I grew
+more excited.
+
+" 'Please tell him I give them away,' I said. The translation of
+my assertion into German did not help me; a double grunt from the
+functionary, was the only response. Tom Thumb, meanwhile, jumped
+about like a little monkey, for he was fairly delighted at my
+worry and perplexity. Finally, I said to my new found English
+friend: 'Be good enough to tell the officer to keep the bills if
+he wants them, and that I will not pay duty on them, any how.'
+
+"He was duly informed of my determination, but he was immovable.
+He lighted his huge Dutch pipe, got the exact weight, and,
+marking it down, handed it to a clerk, who copied it on his book,
+and solemnly passed it over to another clerk, who copied it on
+still another book; a third clerk then took it, and copied it on
+to a printed bill, the size of a half letter sheet, which was
+duly stamped in red ink with several official devices. By this
+time I was in a profuse perspiration; and, as the document passed
+from clerk to clerk, I told them they need not trouble themselves
+to make out a bill, for I would not pay it; they would get no
+duty and they might keep the property.
+
+"To be sure, I could not spare the placards for any length of
+time, for they were exceedingly valuable to me as advertisements,
+and I could not easily have duplicated them in Germany; but I was
+determined that I would not pay duties on articles which were not
+merchandise. Every transfer, therefore, of the bill to a new
+clerk, gave me a fresh twinge, for I imagined that every clerk
+added more charges, and that every charge was a tighter turn to
+the vise which held my fingers. Finally, the last clerk defiantly
+thrust in my face the terrible official document, on which were
+scrawled certain cabalistic characters, signifying the amount of
+money I should be forced to pay to the German government before I
+could have my property. I would not touch it but resolved I would
+really leave my packages until I could communicate with one of
+our consuls in Germany, and I said as much to the English
+gentleman who had kindly interpreted for me.
+
+"He took the bill, and, examining it, burst into a loud laugh,
+'Why, it is but fifteen kreutzers!' he said.
+
+" 'How much is that?' I asked, feeling for the golden sovereigns
+in my pocket.
+
+" 'Sixpence!' was the reply.
+
+"I was astonished and delighted, and, as I handed out the money,
+I begged him to tell the officials that the custom-house charge
+would not pay the cost of the paper on which it was written. But
+this was a very fair illustration of sundry red-tape dealings in
+other countries as well as in Germany."
+
+Baden-Baden was found to be an uncommonly pleasant place, the
+neatest and cleanest little city he had ever seen, Barnum
+thought. As soon as they were fairly settled there, Tom Thumb
+began driving out on the streets in his tiny carriage, with his
+ponies and liveried coachmen and footmen. Public curiosity was
+greatly excited. The place was thronged with visitors, it being
+one of the most popular resorts in Europe. There were kings and
+queens, and minor royalties and members of the nobility without
+number. All these soon forgot their other amusements and
+entertainments in their interest in the little General. They
+crowded his rooms at his reception every day, and Barnum, seeing
+the quality of his patrons, put the entrance fee higher than it
+ever was at any other place. Their stay at this resort was
+exceedingly profitable.
+
+Thence they proceeded to the other German watering places, such
+as Ems, Weisbaden and Hamburg. They saw that it paid to strike
+for high game. No matter how high their fee, the crowned, titled,
+rich, aristocratic throng came to their show by thousands. Among
+them was the King of Holland, who was particularly interested in
+Tom Thumb. So profitable was the tour, that Barnum was able to
+send many thousands of dollars to his agents in America, to buy
+back his real estate and settle up the remains of the disastrous
+clock business.
+
+Other German cities visited were Frankfort-on-the-Main, Mayence
+and Cologne. At the latter place, they remained for some time,
+seeing as well as giving shows. Then they went on to Rotterdam
+and Amsterdam.
+
+The shrewd and enterprising Yankee was much impressed by the
+thrift and industry of Holland. "It gave me," he afterwards said,
+"more genuine satisfaction than any other foreign country I have
+ever visited, if I except Great Britain. Redeemed as a large
+portion of the whole surface of the land has been from the bottom
+of the sea, by the wonderful dykes, which are monuments of the
+industry of whole generations of human beavers, Holland seems to
+me the most curious, as well as interesting country in the world.
+The people, too, with their quaint costumes, their extraordinary
+cleanliness, their thrift, industry and frugality, pleased me
+very much. It is the universal testimony of all travellers, that
+the Hollanders are the neatest and most economical people among
+all nations. So far as cleanliness is concerned, in Holland it is
+evidently not next to, but far ahead of godliness. It is rare,
+indeed, to meet a ragged, dirty, or drunken person. The people
+are very temperate and economical in their habits; and even the
+very rich--and there is a vast amount of wealth in the
+country--live with great frugality, though all of the people live
+well.
+
+"As for the scenery, I cannot say much for it, since it is only
+diversified by thousands of windmills, which are made to do all
+kinds of work, from grinding grain to pumping water from the
+inside of the dykes back to the sea again. As I exhibited the
+General only in Rotterdam and Amsterdam, and to no great profit
+in either city, we spent most of our time in rambling about to
+see what was to be seen. In the country villages it seemed as if
+every house was scrubbed twice and whitewashed once every day in
+the week, excepting Sunday. Some places were almost painfully
+pure, and I was in one village where horses and cattle were not
+allowed to go through the streets and no one was permitted to
+wear their boots or shoes in the houses. There is a general and
+constant exercise of brooms, pails, floor-brushes and mops all
+over Holland, and in some places, even, this kind of thing is
+carried so far, I am told, that the only trees set out are
+scrub-oaks."
+
+Barnum thought that the reason why his exhibitions were not
+better patronized here was that the people were too frugal to
+spend much money for mere amusements. "But they and their habits
+and ways afforded us so much amusement, that we were quite
+willing they should give our entertainment the 'go by,' as they
+generally did. We were in Amsterdam at the season of 'Kremis,' or
+the annual fair, which is held in all the principal towns, and
+where shows of all descriptions are open, at prices for admission
+ranging from one to five pennies, and are attended by nearly the
+whole population. For the people generally, this one great
+holiday seems all-sufficient for the whole year. I went through
+scores of booths, where curiosities and monstrosities of all
+kinds were exhibited, and was able to make some purchases and
+engagements for the American Museum. Among these was the Albino
+family, consisting of a man, his wife, and son, who were by far
+the most interesting and attractive specimens of their class I
+had ever seen.
+
+"We visited the Hague, the capital and the finest city in
+Holland. It is handsomely and regularly laid out, and contains a
+beautiful theatre, a public picture gallery, which contains some
+of the best works of Vandyke, Paul Potter, and other Dutch
+masters, while the museum is especially rich in rarities from
+China and Japan. When we arrived at the Hague, Mr. August
+Belmont, who had been the United States Minister at that court,
+had just gone home, but I heard many encomiums passed upon him
+and his family, and I was told some pretty good stories of his
+familiarity with the king, and of the 'jolly times' these two
+personages frequently enjoyed together. I did not miss visiting
+the great government museum, as I wished particularly to see the
+rich collection of Japan ware and arms, made during the many
+years when the Dutch carried on almost exclusively the entire
+foreign trade with the Japanese. I spent several days in minutely
+examining these curious manufactures of a people who were then
+almost as little known to nations generally as are the
+inhabitants of the planet Jupiter."
+
+On the first day of his visits to this museum, Barnum stood for
+an hour before a large case containing a most unique and
+extraordinary collection of fabulous animals, made from paper and
+other materials, and looking as natural and genuine as the
+stuffed skins of any animals in the American Museum. There were
+serpents two yards long, with a head and a pair of feet at each
+end; frogs as large as a man, with human hands and feet; turtles
+with three heads; monkeys with two heads and six legs; scores of
+equally curious monstrosities; and at least two dozen mermaids,
+of all sorts and sizes. Looking at these "sirens" he easily
+divined from whence the Feejee mermaid originated.
+
+After a delightful visit in Holland, he went back to England; and
+proceeding to Manchester, opened his exhibition. For several days
+the hall was crowded to overflowing at each of the three, and
+sometimes four, entertainments they gave every day. By this time,
+his wife and two youngest daughters had come over to London, and
+he hired furnished lodgings in the suburbs where they could live
+within the strictest limits of economy. It was necessary now for
+him to return for a few weeks to America, to assist personally in
+forwarding a settlement of the clock difficulties. So leaving the
+little General in the hands of trusty and competent agents to
+carry on the exhibitions in his absence, he set his face once
+more towards home and the west, and took steamer at Liverpool for
+New York.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXVIII. HOME AGAIN.
+
+JOLLY VOYAGE--MOCK TRIALS ON SHIPBOARD--BARNUM ON TRIAL FOR HIS
+LIFE--DISCOMFITED WITNESSES AND A TRIUMPHANT PRISONER--FAIR
+WEATHER FRIENDS--THE BURNING OF IRANISTAN
+
+Barnum made in his life many voyages across the Atlantic, but
+none, perhaps, pleasanter than this. On every such trip he got
+under rest and relief from his multitudinous business cares and
+arduous labors; and he always contrived to organize plenty of
+merry-making among his fellow-passengers. On this occasion he
+felt in uncommonly good spirits because he was so rapidly
+retrieving his well-nigh fallen fortunes. The feature of the
+voyage was a series of mock trials, in which a judge was
+selected, jurymen drawn, prisoners arraigned, counsel employed,
+and all the formalities of a court established. "I have the
+vanity to think," said he, afterwards, in telling in his own
+inimitable way the story of this voyage, "that if my good fortune
+had directed me to that profession, I should have made a very
+fair lawyer for I have always had a great fondness for debate and
+especially for the cross-examination of witnesses, unless that
+witness was P. T. Barnum in examination under supplementary
+proceedings at the instance of some note shaver, who had bought a
+clock note at a discount of thirty-six per cent. In this mock
+court, I was unanimously chosen as prosecuting attorney, and, as
+the court was established expressly to convict, I had no
+difficulty in carrying the jury and securing the punishment of
+the prisoner. A small fine was generally imposed, and the fund
+thus collected was given to a poor sailor boy who had fallen from
+the mast and broken his leg."
+
+"After several of these trials had been held, a dozen or more of
+the passengers secretly put their heads together and resolved to
+place the 'showman' on trial for his life. An indictment,
+covering twenty pages, was drawn up by several legal gentlemen
+among the passengers, charging him with being the Prince of
+Humbugs, and enumerating a dozen special counts, containing
+charges of the most absurd and ridiculous description. Witnesses
+were then brought together, and privately instructed what to say
+and do. Two or three days were devoted to arranging this mighty
+prosecution, 'When everything was ready, I was arrested, and the
+formidable indictment read to me. I saw at a glance that time and
+talent had been brought into requisition, and that my trial was
+to be more elaborate than any that had preceded it. I asked for
+half an hour to prepare for my defense, which was granted.
+Meanwhile, seats were arranged to accommodate the court and
+spectators, and extra settees were placed for the ladies on the
+upper deck, where they could look down, see and hear all that
+transpired. Curiosity was on tip-toe, for it was evident that
+this was to be a long, exciting and laughable trial. At the end
+of half an hour the judge was on the bench the jury had taken
+their places; the witnesses were ready; the counsel for the
+prosecution, four in number, with pens, ink, and paper in
+profusion, were seated, and everything seemed ready. I was
+brought in by a special constable, the indictment read, and I was
+asked to plead guilty, or not guilty. I rose and In a most solemn
+manner, stated that I could not conscientiously plead guilty or
+not guilty; that I had, in fact, committed many of the acts
+charged in the indictment, but these acts, I was ready to show,
+were not criminal, but on the contrary, worthy of praise. My plea
+was received and the first witness called.
+
+"He testified to having visited the prisoner's museum, and of
+being humbugged by the Feejee mermaid; the nurse of Washington;
+and by other curiosities, natural and unnatural. The questions
+and answers having been all arranged in advance, everything
+worked smoothly. Acting as my own counsel, I cross-examined the
+witness by simply asking whether he saw anything else in the
+museum besides what he had mentioned.
+
+" 'Oh! yes, I saw thousands of other things.'
+
+" 'Were they curious?'
+
+" 'Certainly; many of them very astonishing.'
+
+" 'Did you ever witness a dramatic representation in the museum?'
+
+" 'Yes, sir, a very good one.'
+
+" 'What did you pay for all this?'
+
+" 'Twenty-five cents.'
+
+" 'That will do, sir; you can step down.'
+
+"A second, third and fourth witness were called, and the
+examination was similar to the foregoing. Another witness then
+appeared to testify in regard to another count in the indictment.
+He stated that for several weeks he was the guest of the
+prisoner, at his country residence Iranistan and he gave a most
+amusing description of the various schemes and contrivances which
+were there originated for the purpose of being carried out at
+some future day in the museum.
+
+" 'How did you live there?' asked one of the counsel for the
+prosecution.
+
+" 'Very well, indeed, in the daytime,' was the reply; 'plenty of
+the best to eat and drink except liquors. In bed, however, it was
+impossible to sleep. I rose the first night, struck a light, and
+on examination found myself covered with myriads of tattle bugs,
+so small as to be almost imperceptible. By using my microscope I
+discovered them to be infantile bedbugs. After the first night I
+was obliged to sleep in the coach-house in order to escape this
+annoyance.'
+
+"Of course this elicited much mirth. The first question put on
+the cross-examination was this:
+
+" 'Are you a naturalist, sir?'
+
+"The witness hesitated. In all the drilling that had taken place
+before the trial, neither the counsel nor witnesses had thought
+of what questions might come up in the cross-examination, and
+now, not seeing the drift of the question, the witness seemed a
+little bewildered, and the counsel for the prosecution looked
+puzzled.
+
+"The question was repeated with some emphasis.
+
+" 'No, sir,' replied the witness, hesitatingly, 'I am not a
+naturalist.'
+
+" 'Then, sir, not being a naturalist, dare you affirm that those
+microscopic insects were not humbugs instead of bedbugs'--(here
+the prisoner was interrupted by a universal shout of laughter, in
+which the solemn judge himself joined)--land if they were
+humbugs, I suppose that even the learned counsel opposed to me
+will not claim that they were out of place.
+
+" 'They may have been humbugs,' replied the witness.
+
+" 'That will do, sir; you may go,' said I; and at the same time,
+turning to the array of counsel, I remarked, with a smile, 'You
+had better have a naturalist for your next witness, gentlemen.'
+
+" 'Don't be alarmed, sir, we have got one, and we will now
+introduce him,' replied the counsel.
+
+"The next witness testified that he was a planter from Georgia,
+that some years since the prisoner visited his plantation with a
+show, and that while there he discovered an old worthless donkey
+belonging to the planter, and bought him for five dollars. The
+next year the witness visited Iranistan, the country seat of the
+prisoner, and, while walking about the grounds, his old donkey,
+recognizing his former master, brayed; 'whereupon,' continued the
+witness, 'I walked up to the animal and found that two men were
+engaged in sticking wool upon him, and this animal was afterwards
+exhibited by the prisoner as the woolly horse.'
+
+"The whole court--spectators, and even the 'prisoner'
+himself--were convulsed with laughter at the gravity with which
+the planter gave his very ludicrous testimony.
+
+" 'What evidence have you,' I inquired, 'that this was the same
+donkey which you sold to me?'
+
+" 'The fact that the animal recognized me, as was evident from
+his braying as soon as he saw me.'
+
+" 'Are you a naturalist, sir?'
+
+" 'Yes, I am,' replied the planter, with firm emphasis, as much
+as to say, you can't catch me as you did the other witness.
+
+" 'Oh! you are a naturalist, are you? Then, sir, I ask you, as a
+naturalist, do you not know it to be a fact in natural history
+that one jackass always brays as soon as he sees another?'
+
+"This question was received with shouts of laughter, in the midst
+of which the nonplussed witness backed out of court, and all the
+efforts of special constables, and even the high sheriff himself,
+were unavailing in getting him again on the witness stand.
+
+"This trial lasted two days, to the great delight of all on
+board. After my success with the 'naturalist,' not one-half of
+the witnesses would appear against me. In my final argument I
+sifted the testimony, analyzed its bearings, ruffled the learned
+counsel, disconcerted the witnesses, flattered the judge and
+jury, and when the judge had delivered his charge, the jury
+acquitted me without leaving their seats. The judge received the
+verdict, and then announced that he should fine the naturalist
+for the mistake he made, as to the cause of the donkey's braying,
+and he should also fine the several witnesses, who, through fear
+of the cross-fire, had refused to testify."
+
+The trial afforded a pleasant topic of conversation for the rest
+of the voyage; and the morning before arriving in port, a vote of
+thanks was passed to Barnum, in consideration of the amusement he
+had intentionally and unintentionally furnished to the passengers
+during the voyage.
+
+The treatment to which Barnum was subjected on his arrival in New
+York, was in strange and discreditable contrast to that which he
+had enjoyed abroad. He sometimes spoke of it in later life,
+though without any bitterness. He was too much of a philosopher
+to take it to heart. "After my arrival," he would say, "often, in
+passing up and down Broadway, I saw old and prosperous friends
+coming, but before I came anywhere near them, if they espied me,
+they would dodge into a store, or across the street, or
+opportunely meet some one with whom they had pressing business,
+or they would be very much interested in something that was going
+on over the way, or on top of the City Hall. I was delighted at
+this, for it gave me at once a new sensation and a new
+experience. 'Ah, ha!' I said to myself, 'my butterfly friends, I
+know you now; and, what is more to the point, if ever I get out
+of this bewilderment of broken clock-wheels, I shall not forget
+you;' and I heartily thanked the old clock concern for giving me
+the opportunity to learn this sad but most needful lesson. I had
+a very few of the same sort of experiences in Bridgeport, and
+they proved valuable to me."
+
+One of Barnum's assignees was his neighbor and quondam
+"gamekeeper," Mr. Johnson, and he it was who had written to
+Barnum to return to America, to facilitate the settlement of his
+affairs. He now told him that there was no probability of
+disposing of Iranistan at present, and that therefore he might as
+well move back into his old home. That was August. In September,
+Barnum's family followed him to America, and they decided to take
+Mr. Johnson's advice and re-occupy Iranistan. They went to
+Bridgeport, to superintend arrangements, and there Barnum's
+second daughter, Helen, was married to Mr. S. W. Hurd, on October
+20, 1857.
+
+"Meanwhile, Iranistan, which had been closed and unoccupied for
+more than two years, was once more opened to the carpenters and
+painters whom Mr. Johnson sent there to put the house in order.
+He agreed with Barnum that it was best to keep the property as
+long as possible, and in the interval, till a purchaser for the
+estate appeared, or till it was forced to auction, to take up the
+clock notes, whenever they were offered. The workmen who were
+employed in the house were specially instructed not to smoke
+there, but nevertheless, it was subsequently discovered that some
+of the men were in the habit occasionally of going into the main
+dome to eat their dinners which they brought with them, and that
+they stayed there awhile after dinner to smoke their pipes. In
+all probability, one of these lighted pipes was left on the
+cushion which covered the circular seat in the dome and ignited
+the tow with which the cushion was stuffed. It may have been days
+and even weeks before this smouldering tow fire burst into flame.
+
+Barnum was staying at the Astor House, in New York, when, on the
+morning of December 18, 1857, he received a telegram from his
+brother, Philo F. Barnum, dated at Bridgeport, and informing him
+that Iranistan was burned to the ground that morning. The alarm
+was given at eleven o'clock on the night of the 17th, and the
+fire burned till one o'clock on the morning of the 18th.
+
+This was, of course, a considerable loss to Barnum's estate, for
+the house had cost about $150,000. It was also generally regarded
+as a public calamity. This house had been the only building in
+its peculiar style of architecture of any pretension in America,
+and many persons had visited Bridgeport every year expressly to
+see it. The insurance on the mansion had usually been about
+$62,000, but Barnum had let some of the policies expire without
+renewing them, so that at the time of the fire there was only
+$28,000 insurance on the property. Most of the furniture and
+pictures were saved, generally in a damaged state.
+
+Subsequently, the assignees sold the grounds and outhouses of
+Iranistan to Elias Howe, Jr., the inventor of the sewing-machine.
+The property brought $50,000, which, with the $28,000 insurance
+went into Barnum's assets to satisfy clock creditors. It was Mr.
+Howe's intention to erect a splendid mansion on the estate, but
+his untimely and lamented death prevented the fulfilment of the
+plan.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXIX. THE ART OF MONEY GETTING.
+
+THE LECTURE FIELD--SUCCESS--CAMBRIDGE--OXFORD--AN UNIQUE
+ENTERTAINMENT--BARNUM EQUAL TO THE OCCASION--INVITED TO STAY A
+WEEK.
+
+Seeing the necessity of making more money to assist in
+extricating his affairs from financial disorder, Barnum went back
+to England, taking with him Tom Thumb, whom he exhibited in all
+the principal places of England, Scotland and Wales; this was
+early in 1858.
+
+The tour was a profitable one, and the money, as fast as it came
+in, was remitted to his agents and assignees in America.
+
+At the suggestion of some of his American friends In London,
+Barnum next appeared on the lecture platform. The subject chosen
+was "The Art of Money Getting," although Barnum told his friends
+that in the light of recent events he felt more competent to
+speak on the art of money losing. But they assured him that his
+name having been associated with the Jenny Lind concerts and
+other great money-making enterprises, the lecture would
+undoubtedly prove both attractive and profitable.
+
+The lecture was widely advertised, of course, and at the
+appointed time the great St. James' Hall, Regent Street,
+Piccadilly, was completely filled. It was the evening of December
+29, 1858. We subjoin extracts from the lecture, which was closely
+listened to and well received by many more audiences than the one
+which heard it first at St. James' Hall.
+
+Those who really desire to attain an independence, have only to
+set their minds upon it, and adopt the proper means, as they do
+in regard to any other object which they wish to accomplish, and
+the thing is easily done. But however easy it may be found to
+make money, I have no doubt many of my hearers will agree it is
+the most difficult thing in the world to keep it. The road to
+wealth is, as Dr. Franklin truly says, "as plain as the road to
+mill." It consists simply in expending less than we earn; that
+seems to be a very simple problem. Mr. Micawber, one of those
+happy creations of the genial Dickens, puts the case in a strong
+light when he says that to have an income of twenty pounds per
+annum, and spend twenty pounds and sixpence, is to be the most
+miserable of men; whereas, to have an income of only twenty
+pounds, and spend but nineteen pounds and sixpence, is to be the
+happiest of mortals. Many of my hearers may say, "we understand
+this; this is economy, and we know economy is wealth; we know we
+can't eat our cake and keep it also." Yet I beg to say that
+perhaps more cases of failure arise from mistakes on this point
+than almost any other. The fact is, many people think they
+understand economy when they really do not.
+
+True economy is misapprehended, and people go through life
+without properly comprehending what that principle is. One says,
+"I have an income of so much, and here is my neighbor who has the
+same; yet every year he gets something ahead and I fall short;
+why is it? I know all about economy." He thinks he does, but he
+does not. There are many who think that economy consists in
+saving cheese-parings and candle-ends, in cutting off twopence
+from the laundress' bill and doing all sorts of little mean,
+dirty things. Economy is not meanness. The misfortune is, also,
+that this class of persons let their economy apply in only one
+direction. They fancy they are so wonderfully economical in
+saving a half-penny where they ought to spend twopence, that they
+think they can afford to squander in other directions. A few
+years ago, before kerosene oil was discovered or thought of, one
+might stop over night at almost any farmer's house in the
+agricultural districts and get a very good supper, but after
+supper he might attempt to read in the sitting-room, and would
+find it impossible with the inefficient light of one candle. The
+hostess, seeing his dilemma, would say: "It is rather difficult
+to read here evenings; the proverb says 'you must have a ship at
+sea in order to be able to burn two candles at once;' we never
+have an extra candle except on extra occasions." These extra
+occasions occur, perhaps, twice a year. In this way the good
+woman saves five, six, or ten dollars in that time; but the
+information which might be derived from having the extra light
+would, of course, far outweigh a ton of candles.
+
+But the trouble does not end here. Feeling that she is so
+economical in tallow candles, she thinks she can afford to go
+frequently to the village and spend twenty or thirty dollars for
+ribbons and furbelows, many of which are not necessary. This
+false economy may frequently be seen in men of business, and in
+those instances it often runs to writing-paper. You find good
+business men who save all the old envelopes and scraps, and would
+not tear a new sheet of paper, if they could avoid it, for the
+world. This is all very well; they may in this way save five or
+ten dollars a year, but being so economical (only in note-paper),
+they think they can afford to waste time; to have expensive
+parties, and to drive their carriages.
+
+True economy consists in always making the income exceed the
+out-go. Wear the old clothes a little longer if necessary;
+dispense with the new pair of gloves; mend the old dress; live on
+plainer food if need be; so that, under all circumstances, unless
+some unforeseen accident occurs, there will be a margin in favor
+of the income. A penny here, and a dollar there, placed at
+interest, goes on accumulating, and in this way the desired
+result is attained. It requires some training, perhaps, to
+accomplish this economy, but when once used to it, you will find
+there is more satisfaction in rational saving than in irrational
+spending. Here is a recipe which I recommend; I have found it to
+work an excellent cure for extravagance, and especially for
+mistaken economy: When you find that you have no surplus at the
+end of the year, and yet have a good income, I advise you to take
+a few sheets of paper and form them into a book and mark down
+every item of expenditure. Post it every day or week in two
+columns, one headed "necessaries" or even "comforts," and the
+other headed "luxuries," and you will find that the latter column
+will be double, treble, and frequently ten times greater than the
+former. The real comforts of life cost but a small portion of
+what most of us can earn.
+
+The foundation of success in life is good health; that is the
+substratum of fortune; it is also the basis of happiness. A
+person cannot accumulate a fortune very well when he is sick. He
+has no ambition; no incentive; no force. Of course, there are
+those who have bad health and cannot help it; you cannot expect
+that such persons can accumulate wealth; but there are a great
+many in poor health who need not be so.
+
+If, then, sound health is the foundation of success and happiness
+in life, how important it is that we should study the laws of
+health, which is but another expression for the laws of nature!
+The closer we keep to the laws of nature the nearer we are to
+good health, and yet how many persons there are who pay no
+attention to natural laws, but absolutely transgress them, even
+against their own natural inclination. We ought to know that the
+"sin of ignorance" is never winked at in regard to the violation
+of nature's laws; their infraction always brings the penalty. A
+child may thrust its finger into the flames without knowing it
+will burn, and so suffers; repentance, even, will not stop the
+smart. Many of our ancestors knew very little about the principle
+of ventilation. They did not know much about oxygen, whatever
+other "gin" they might have been acquainted with; and
+consequently, they built their houses with little seven-by-nine
+feet bedrooms, and these good old pious Puritans would lock
+themselves up in one of these cells, say their prayers and go to
+bed. In the morning they would devoutly return thanks for the
+"preservation of their lives" during the night, and nobody had
+better reason to be thankful. Probably some big crack in the
+window, or in the door, let in a little fresh air, and thus saved
+them.
+
+Many persons knowingly violate the laws of nature against their
+better impulses, for the sake of fashion. For instance, there is
+one thing that nothing living except a vile worm ever naturally
+loved, and that is tobacco; yet how many persons there are who
+deliberately train an unnatural appetite, and overcome this
+implanted aversion for tobacco, to such a degree that they get to
+love it. They have got hold of a poisonous, filthy weed, or
+rather that takes a firm hold of them. Here are married men who
+run about spitting tobacco-juice on the carpet and floors, and
+sometimes even upon their wives besides. They do not kick their
+wives out-of-doors like drunken men, but their wives, I have no
+doubt, often wish they were outside of the house. Another
+perilous feature is that this artificial appetite, like jealousy,
+"grows by what it feeds on;" when you love that which is
+unnatural, a stronger appetite is created for the hurtful thing
+than the natural desire for what is harmless. There is an old
+proverb which says that "habit is second nature," but an
+artificial habit is stronger than nature. Take, for instance, an
+old tobacco-chewer; his love for the "quid" is stronger than his
+love for any particular kind of food. He can give up roast beef
+easier than give up the weed.
+
+These remarks apply with tenfold force to the use of intoxicating
+drinks. To make money, requires a clear brain. A man has got to
+see that two and two make four; he must lay all his plans with
+reflection and forethought, and closely examine all the details
+and the ins and outs of business. As no man can succeed in
+business unless he has a brain to enable him to lay his plans,
+and reason to guide him in their execution, so, no matter how
+bountifully a man may be blessed with intelligence, if the brain
+is muddled, and his judgment warped by intoxicating drinks, it is
+impossible for him to carry on business successfully. How many
+good opportunities have passed, never to return, while a man was
+sipping a "social glass" with his friend! How many foolish
+bargains have been made under the influence of the "nervine,"
+which temporarily makes its victim think he is rich. How many
+important chances have been put off until to-morrow, and then
+forever, because the wine-cup has thrown the system into a state
+of lassitude, neutralizing the energies so essential to success
+in business. Verily, "wine is a mocker." The use of intoxicating
+drinks as a beverage is as much an infatuation as is the smoking
+of opium by the Chinese, and the former is quite as destructive
+to the success of the business man as the latter. It is an
+unmitigated evil, utterly indefensible in the light of
+philosophy, religion or good sense. It is the parent of nearly
+every other evil in our country.
+
+The safest plan, and the one most sure of success for the young
+man starting in life, is to select the vocation which is most
+congenial to his tastes. Parents and guardians are often quite
+too negligent in regard to this. It is very common for a father
+to say, for example: "I have five boys. I will make Billy a
+clergyman; John a lawyer; Tom a doctor, and Dick a farmer." He
+then goes into town and looks about to see what he will do with
+Sammy. He returns home, and says: "Sammy, I see watchmaking is a
+nice, genteel business; I think I will make you a goldsmith." He
+does this, regardless of Sam's natural inclinations or genius.
+
+We are all, no doubt, born for a wise purpose. There is as much
+diversity in our brains as in our countenances. Some are born
+natural mechanics, while some have great aversion to machinery.
+Let a dozen boys of ten years get together, and you will soon
+observe two or three are "whittling" out some ingenious device;
+working with locks or complicated machinery. When they were but
+five years old their father could find no toy to please them like
+a puzzle. They are natural mechanics; but the other eight or nine
+boys have different aptitudes I belong to the latter class; I
+never had the slightest love for mechanism; on the contrary, I
+have a sort of abhorrence for complicated machinery. I never had
+ingenuity enough to whittle a cider-tap so it would not leak. I
+never could make a pen that I could write with, or understand the
+principle of a steam-engine. If a man was to take such a boy as I
+was, and attempt to make a watchmaker of him, the boy might,
+after an apprenticeship of five or seven years be able to take
+apart and put together a watch; but all through life he would be
+working uphill and seizing every excuse for leaving his work and
+idling away his time. Watchmaking is repulsive to him.
+
+Unless a man enters upon the vocation intended for him by nature,
+and best suited to his peculiar genius, he cannot succeed. I am
+glad to believe that the majority of persons do find their right
+vocation. Yet we see many who have mistaken their calling from
+the blacksmith up (or down) to the clergyman. You will see, for
+instance, that extraordinary linguist, the "learned blacksmith,"
+who ought to have been a teacher of languages; and you may have
+seen lawyers, doctors and clergymen who were better fitted by
+nature for the anvil or the lapstone.
+
+Avoid debt. Young men starting in life should avoid running into
+debt. There is scarcely anything that drags a person down like
+debt. It is a slavish position to get in, yet we find many a
+young man, hardly out of his "teens," running in debt. He meets a
+chum, and says, "Look at this: I have got trusted for a new suit
+of clothes." He seems to look upon the clothes as so much given
+to him; well, it frequently is so, but, if he succeeds in paying
+and then gets trusted again, he is adopting a habit which will
+keep him in poverty through life. Debt robs a man of his
+self-respect, and makes him almost despise himself. Grunting and
+groaning and working for what he has eaten up or worn out, and
+now when he is called upon to pay up he has nothing to show for
+his money; this is properly termed "working for a dead horse." I
+do not speak of merchants buying and selling on credit, or of
+those who buy on credit in order to turn the purchase to a
+profit. The old Quaker said to his farmer son, "John, never get
+trusted; but if thee gets trusted for anything, let it be for
+'manure,' because that will help thee pay it back again."
+
+Mr. Beecher advised young men to get in debt if they could to a
+small amount in the purchase of land in the country districts.
+"If a young man," he says, "will only get in debt for some land
+and then get married, these two things will keep him straight, or
+nothing will." This may be safe to a limited extent, but getting
+in debt for what you eat and drink and wear is to be avoided.
+Some families have a foolish habit of getting credit at "the
+stores," and thus frequently purchase many things which might
+have been dispensed with.
+
+It is all very well to say, "I have got trusted for sixty days,
+and if I don't have the money the creditor will think nothing
+about it." There is no class of people in the world who have such
+good memories as creditors. When the sixty days run out you will
+have to pay. If you do not pay, you will break your promise, and
+probably resort to a falsehood. You may make some excuse or get
+in debt elsewhere to pay it, but that only involves you the
+deeper.
+
+A good-looking, lazy young fellow, was the apprentice boy,
+Horatio. His employer said, "Horatio, did you ever see a snail?"
+"I--think--I--have," he drawled out. "You must have met him,
+then, for I am sure you never overtook one," said the "boss."
+Your creditor will meet you or overtake you and say, "Now, my
+young friend, you agreed to pay me; you have not done it, you
+must give me your note." You give the note on interest and it
+commences working against you; "it is a dead horse." The creditor
+goes to bed at night and wakes up in the morning better off than
+when he retired to bed, because his interest has increased during
+the night, but you grow poorer while you are sleeping, for the
+interest is accumulating against you.
+
+Among the maxims of the elder Rothschild was one, an apparent
+paradox: "Be cautious and bold." This seems to be a contradiction
+in terms, but it is not, and there is great wisdom in the maxim.
+It is, in fact, a condensed statement of what I have already
+said. It is to say, "you must exercise your caution in laying
+your plans, but be bold in carrying them out." A man who is all
+caution will never dare to take hold and be successful; and a man
+who is all boldness is merely reckless, and must eventually fail.
+A man may go on "'change" and make fifty or one hundred thousand
+dollars in speculating in stocks at a single operation. But if he
+has simple boldness without caution, it is mere chance, and what
+he gains to-day he will lose to-morrow. You must have both the
+caution and the boldness to insure success.
+
+The Rothschilds have another maxim: "Never have anything to do
+with an unlucky man or place." That is to say, never have
+anything to do with a man or place which never succeeds, because,
+although a man may appear to be honest and intelligent, yet if he
+tries this or that thing and always fails, it is on account of
+some fault or infirmity that you may not be able to discover, but
+nevertheless which must exist.
+
+There is no such thing in the world as luck. There never was a
+man who could go out in the morning and find a purse full of gold
+in the street to-day, and another to-morrow, and so on, day after
+day. He may do so once in his life; but so far as mere luck is
+concerned, he is as liable to lose it as to find it. "Like causes
+produce like effects." If a man adopts the proper methods to be
+successful, "luck" will not prevent him. If he does not succeed,
+there are reasons for it, although, perhaps, he may not be able
+to see them.
+
+We all depend, more or less, upon the public for our support. We
+all trade with the public--lawyers, doctors, shoemakers, artists,
+blacksmiths, showmen, opera singers, railroad presidents, and
+college professors. Those who deal with the public must be
+careful that their goods are valuable; that they are genuine, and
+will give satisfaction. When you get an article which you know is
+going to please your customers, and that when they have tried it
+they will feel they have got their money's worth, then let the
+fact be known that you have got it. Be careful to advertise it in
+some shape or other, because it is evident that if a man has ever
+so good an article for sale, and nobody knows it, it will bring
+him no return. In a country like this, where nearly everybody
+reads, and where newspapers are issued and circulated in editions
+of five thousand to two hundred thousand, it would be very unwise
+if this channel was not taken advantage of to reach the public in
+advertising. A newspaper goes into the family, and is read by
+wife and children, as well as the head of the house; hence
+hundreds and thousands of people may read your advertisement,
+while you are attending to your routine business. Many, perhaps,
+read it while you are asleep. The whole philosophy of life is,
+first "sow," then "reap." That is the way the farmer does; he
+plants his potatoes and corn, and sows his grain, and then goes
+about something else, and the time comes when he reaps. But he
+never reaps first and sows afterwards. This principle applies to
+all kinds of business, and to nothing more eminently than to
+advertising. If a man has a genuine article, there is no way in
+which he can reap more advantageously than by "sowing" to the
+public in this way. He must, of course, have a really good
+article, and one which will please his customers; anything
+spurious will not succeed permanently, because the public is
+wiser than many imagine. Men and women are selfish, and we all
+prefer purchasing where we can get the most for our money; and we
+try to find out where we can most surely do so.
+
+You may advertise a spurious article, and induce many people to
+call and buy it once, but they will denounce you as an impostor
+and swindler, and your business will gradually die out and leave
+you poor. This is right. Few people can safely depend upon chance
+custom. You all need to have your customers return and purchase
+again. A man said to me, "I have tried advertising and did not
+succeed; yet I have a good article."
+
+I replied, "My friend, there may be exceptions to a general rule.
+But how do you advertise?"
+
+"I put it in a weekly newspaper three times, and paid a dollar
+and a half for it." I replied: "Sir, advertising is like
+learning--'a little is a dangerous thing!' "
+
+A French writer says that "The reader of a newspaper does not see
+the first insertion of an ordinary advertisement; the second
+insertion he sees, but does not read; the third insertion he
+reads; the fourth insertion, he looks at the price; the fifth
+insertion, he speaks of it to his wife; the sixth insertion, he
+is ready to purchase, and the seventh insertion, he purchases."
+Your object in advertising is to make the public understand what
+you have got to sell, and if you have not the pluck to keep
+advertising, until you have imparted that information, all the
+money you have spent is lost.
+
+Work at it, if necessary, early and late, in season and out of
+season, not leaving a stone unturned, and never deferring for a
+single hour that which can be done just as well now. The old
+proverb is full of truth and meaning: "Whatever is worth doing at
+all, is worth doing well." Many a man acquires a fortune by doing
+his business thoroughly, while his neighbor remains poor for
+life, because he only half does it. Ambition, energy, industry,
+perseverance, are indispensable requisites for success in
+business.
+
+Fortune always favors the brave, and never helps a man who does
+not help himself. It won't do to spend your time like Mr.
+Micawber, in waiting for something to "turn up." To such men one
+of two things usually "turns up:" the poor-house or the jail; for
+idleness breeds bad habits, and clothes a man in rags. The poor
+spendthrift vagabond said to a rich man:
+
+"I have discovered there is money enough in the world for all of
+us, if it was equally divided; this must be done, and we shall
+all be happy together."
+
+"But," was the response, "if everybody was like you, it would be
+spent in two months, and what would you do then?"
+
+"Oh! divide again; keep dividing, of course!"
+
+I was recently reading in a London paper an account of a like
+philosophic pauper, who was kicked out of a cheap boarding-house
+because he could not pay his bill, but he had a roll of papers
+sticking out of his coat pocket, which, upon examination, proved
+to be his plan for paying off the national debt of England
+without the aid of a penny. People have got to do as Cromwell
+said: "Not only trust in Providence, but keep the powder dry." Do
+your part of the work, or you cannot succeed. Mahomet, one night,
+while encamping in the desert, overheard one of his fatigued
+followers remark: "I will loose my camel, and trust it to God."
+"No, no, not so," said the prophet; "tie thy camel, and trust it
+to God." Do all you can for yourselves, and then trust to
+Providence, or luck, or whatever you please to call it, for the
+rest.
+
+Some men have a foolish habit of telling their business secrets.
+If they make money they like to tell their neighbors how it was
+done. Nothing is gained by this, and ofttimes much is lost. Say
+nothing about your profits, your hopes, your expectations, your
+intentions. And this should apply to letters as well as to
+conversation. Goethe makes Mephistophiles say: "Never write a
+letter nor destroy one." Business men must write letters, but
+they should be careful what they put in them. If you are losing,
+money, be specially cautious and not tell of it or you will lose
+your reputation.
+
+Preserve your integrity. It is more precious than, diamonds or
+rubies. The old miser said to his sons: "Get money; get it
+honestly, if you can, but get money." This advice was not only
+atrociously wicked, but it was the very essence of stupidity. It
+was as much as to say, "if you find it difficult to obtain money
+honestly, you can easily get it dishonestly. Get it in that way."
+Poor fool! Not to know that the most difficult thing in life is
+to make money dishonestly! not to know that our prisons are full
+of men who attempted to follow this advice; not to understand
+that no man can be dishonest without soon being found out, and
+that when his lack of principle is discovered, nearly every
+avenue to success is closed against him forever. The public very
+properly shun all whose integrity is doubted. No matter how
+polite and pleasant and accommodating a man may be, none of us
+dare to deal with him if we suspect "false weights and measures."
+Strict honesty not only lies at the foundation of all success in
+life (financially), but in every other respect. Uncompromising
+integrity of character is invaluable. It secures to its possessor
+a peace and joy which cannot be attained without it--which no
+amount of money, or houses and lands, can purchase. A man who is
+known to be strictly honest, may be ever so poor, but he has the
+purses of all the community at his disposal--for all know that if
+he promises to return what he borrows, he will never disappoint
+them. As a mere matter of selfishness, therefore, if a man had no
+higher motive for being honest, all will find that the maxim of
+Dr. Franklin can never fail to be true--that "honesty is the best
+policy."
+
+I hold that no man ought ever to indorse a note or become
+security for any man, be it his father or brother, to a greater
+extent than he can afford to lose and care nothing about, without
+taking good security. Here is a man that is worth twenty thousand
+dollars; he is doing a thriving manufacturing or mercantile
+trade; you are retired and living on your money; he comes to you
+and says:
+
+"You are aware that I am worth twenty thousand dollars, and don't
+owe a dollar: if I had five thousand dollars in cash, I could
+purchase a particular lot of goods and double my money in a
+couple of months; will you indorse my note for that amount?"
+
+You reflect that he is worth twenty thousand dollars, and you
+incur no risk by indorsing his note; you like to accommodate him,
+and you lend your name without taking the precaution of getting
+security. Shortly after, he shows you the note with your
+indorsement cancelled, and tells you, probably truly, "that he
+made the profit that he expected by the operation;" you reflect
+that you have done a good action, and the thought makes you feel
+happy. By and by the same thing occurs again and you do it again;
+you have already fixed the impression in your mind that it is
+perfectly safe to indorse his notes without security.
+
+But the trouble is, this man is getting money too easily. He has
+only to take your note to the bank, get it discounted, and take
+the cash. He gets money for the time being without effort;
+without inconvenience to himself. Now mark the result. He sees a
+chance for speculation outside of his business. A temporary
+investment of only $10,000 is required. It is sure to come back
+before a note at the bank would be due. He places a note for that
+amount before you. You sign it almost mechanically. Being firmly
+convinced that your friend is responsible and trustworthy, you
+indorse his notes as a "matter of course."
+
+Unfortunately the speculation does not come to a head quite so
+soon as was expected, and another $10,000 note must be discounted
+to take up the last one when due. Before this note matures the
+speculation has proved an utter failure and all the money is
+lost. Does the loser tell his friend, the indorser, that he has
+lost half of his fortune? Not at all. He don't even mention that
+he has speculated at all. But he has got excited; the spirit of
+speculation has seized him; he sees others making large sums in
+this way (we seldom hear of the loser), and, like other
+speculators, he "looks for his money where he loses it." He tries
+again. Indorsing notes has become chronic with you, and at every
+loss he gets your signature for whatever amount he wants. Finally
+you discover your friend has lost all of his property and all of
+yours. You are overwhelmed with astonishment and grief, and you
+say "it is a hard thing; my friend here has ruined me," but, you
+should add, "I have also ruined him." If you had said in the
+first place, "I will accommodate you, but I never indorse without
+taking ample security," he could not have gone beyond the length
+of his tether, and he would never have been tempted away from his
+legitimate business. It is a very dangerous thing, therefore, at
+any time, to let people get possession of money too easily; it
+tempts them to hazardous speculations, if nothing more. Solomon
+truly said, "He that hateth suretiship is sure."
+
+We sometimes see men who have obtained fortunes suddenly become
+poor. In many cases this arises from intemperance, and often from
+gaming and other bad habits. Frequently it occurs because a man
+has been engaged in "outside operations" of some sort. When he
+gets rich in his legitimate business, he is told of a grand
+speculation where he can make a score of thousands. He is
+constantly flattered by his friends, who tell him that he is born
+lucky, that everything he touches turns into gold. Now if he
+forgets that his economical habits, his rectitude of conduct and
+a personal attention to a business which he understood, caused
+his success in life, he will listen to the siren voices. He says:
+
+"I will put in twenty thousand dollars. I have been lucky, and my
+good luck will soon bring me back sixty thousand dollars."
+
+A few days elapse, and it is discovered he must put in ten
+thousand dollars more; soon after he is told "it is all right,"
+but certain matters not foreseen require an advance of twenty
+thousand dollars more, which will bring him a rich harvest; but
+before the time comes around to realize the bubble bursts, he
+loses all he is possessed of, and then he learns what he ought to
+have known at the first, that however successful a man may be in
+his own business, if he turns from that and engages in a business
+which he don't understand, he is like Samson when shorn of his
+locks--his strength has departed, and he becomes like other men.
+
+If a man has plenty of money, he ought to invest something in
+everything that appears to promise success, and that will
+probably benefit mankind; but let the sums thus invested be
+moderate in amount, and never let a man foolishly jeopardize a
+fortune that he has earned in a legitimate way by investing it in
+things in which he has had no experience.
+
+When a man is in the right path he must persevere. I speak of
+this because there are some persons who are "born tired;"
+naturally lazy and possessing no self-reliance and no
+perseverance. But they can cultivate these qualities, as Davy
+Crockett said:
+
+          "This thing remember, when I am dead,
+          Be sure you are right, then go ahead."
+
+It is this go-aheaditiveness, this determination not to let the
+"horrors" or the "blues" take possession of you, so as to make
+you relax your energies in the struggle for independence, which
+you must cultivate.
+
+How many have almost reached the goal of their ambition, but,
+losing faith in themselves, have relaxed their energies, and the
+golden prize has been lost forever.
+
+It is, no doubt, often true, as Shakespeare says:
+
+          "There is a tide in the affairs of men,
+          Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune."
+
+ If you hesitate, some bolder hand will stretch out before you
+and get the prize. Remember the proverb of Solomon: "He becometh
+poor that dealeth with a slack hand; but the hand of the diligent
+maketh rich."
+
+Perseverance is sometimes but another word for self-reliance.
+Many persons naturally look on the dark side of life, and borrow
+trouble. They are born so. Then they ask for advice, and they
+will be governed by one wind and blown by another, and cannot
+rely upon themselves. Until you can get so that you can rely upon
+yourself, you need not expect to succeed. I have known men,
+personally, who have met with pecuniary reverses, and absolutely
+committed suicide, because they thought they could never overcome
+their misfortune. But I have known others who have met more
+serious financial difficulties, and have bridged them over by
+simple perseverance, aided by a firm belief that they were doing
+justly, and that Providence would "overcome evil with good."
+
+Learn something useful. Every man should make his son or daughter
+learn some trade or profession, so that in these days of changing
+fortunes--of being rich to-day and poor to-morrow--they may have
+something tangible to fall back upon. This provision might save
+many persons from misery, who by some unexpected turn of fortune
+have lost all their means.
+
+Let hope predominate, but be not too visionary. Many persons are
+always kept poor because they are too visionary. Every project
+looks to them like certain success, and therefore they keep
+changing from one business to another, always in hot water,
+always "under the harrow." The plan of "counting the chickens
+before they are hatched" is an error of ancient date, but it does
+not seem to improve by age.
+
+Do not scatter your powers. Engage in one kind of business only,
+and stick to it faithfully until you succeed, or until your
+experience shows that you should abandon it. A constant hammering
+on one nail will generally drive it home at last, so that it can
+be clinched. When a man's undivided attention is centred on one
+object, his mind will constantly be suggesting improvements of
+value, which would escape him if his brain was occupied by a
+dozen different subjects at once. Many a fortune has slipped
+through a man's fingers because he was engaged in too many
+occupations at a time. There is good sense in the old caution
+against having too many irons in the fire at once.
+
+Be systematic. Men should be systematic in their business. A
+person who does business by rule, having a time and place for
+everything, doing his work promptly, will accomplish twice as
+much and with half the trouble of him who does it carelessly and
+slipshod. By introducing system into all your transactions, doing
+one thing at a time, always meeting appointments with
+punctuality, you will find leisure for pastime and recreation;
+whereas the man who only half does one thing, and then turns to
+something else, and half does that, will have his business at
+loose ends, and will never know when his day's work is done, for
+it never will be done. Of course, there is a limit to all these
+rules. We must try to preserve the happy medium, for there is
+such a thing as being too systematic. There are men and women,
+for instance, who put away things so carefully that they can
+never find them again. It is too much like the "red-tape"
+formality at Washington, and Mr. Dick-ens' "Circumlocution
+Office,"--all theory and no result.
+
+To get rich is not always equivalent to being successful. "there
+are many rich poor men," while there are many others, honest and
+devout men and women, who have never possessed so much money as
+some rich persons squander in a week, but who are nevertheless
+really richer and happier than any man can ever be while he is a
+transgressor of the higher laws of his being.
+
+The inordinate love of money, no doubt, may be and is "the root
+of all evil," but money itself, when properly used, is not only a
+"handy thing to have in the house," but affords the gratification
+of blessing our race by enabling its possessor to enlarge the
+scope of human happiness and human influence. The desire for
+wealth is nearly universal, and none can say it is not laudable,
+provided the possessor of it accepts its responsibilities, and
+uses it as a friend to humanity.
+
+The history of money-getting, which is commerce, is a history of
+civilization, and wherever trade has flourished most, there, too,
+have art and science produced the noblest fruits. In fact, as a
+general thing, money-getters are the benefactors of our race. To
+them in a great measure, are we indebted for our institutions of
+learning and of art, our academies, colleges and churches. It is
+no argument against the desire for, or the possession of, wealth,
+to say that there are sometimes misers who hoard money only for
+the sake of hoarding, and who have no higher aspiration than to
+grasp everything which comes within their reach. As we have
+sometimes hypocrites in religion, and demagogues in politics, so
+there are occasionally misers among money-getters. These,
+however, are only exceptions to the general rule. But when, in
+this country, we find such a nuisance and stumbling block as a
+miser, we remember with gratitude that in America we have no laws
+of primogeniture, and that in the due course of nature the time
+will come when the hoarded dust will be scattered for the benefit
+of mankind. To all men and women, therefore, do I conscientiously
+say, make money honestly, and not otherwise, for Shakespeare has
+truly said, "He that wants money, means and content, is without
+three good friends."
+
+Money is in some respects like fire; it is a very excellent
+servant but a terrible master. When you have it mastering you;
+when interest is constantly piling up against you, it will keep
+you down in the worst kind of slavery. But let money work for
+you, and you have the most devoted servant in the world. It is no
+"eye-servant." There is nothing animate or inanimate that will
+work so faithfully as money when placed at interest, well
+secured. It works night and day, and in wet or dry weather.
+
+Do not let it work against you; if you do, there is no chance for
+success in life so far as money is concerned. John Randolph, the
+eccentric Virginian, once exclaimed in Congress, "Mr. Speaker, I
+have discovered the philosopher's stone: pay as you go." This is,
+indeed, nearer to the philosopher's stone than any alchemist has
+ever yet arrived.
+
+Barnum and the newspapers had always been on the best of terms,
+and in nearly every instance the press praised the lecture in
+most unqualified terms. The following extract from the London
+Times is a fair sample of many notices which he received:
+
+"We are bound to admit that Mr. Barnum is one of the most
+entertaining lecturers that ever addressed an audience on a theme
+universally intelligible. The appearance of Mr. Barnum, it should
+be added, has nothing of the 'charlatan' about it, but is that of
+the thoroughly respectable man of business; and he has at command
+a fund of dry humor that convulses everybody with laughter, while
+he himself remains perfectly serious. A sonorous voice and an
+admirably clear delivery complete his qualifications as a
+lecturer, in which capacity he is no 'humbug,' either in a higher
+or lower sense of the word."
+
+During the year 1859 he delivered this lecture nearly one hundred
+times in London and in different parts of England, always with
+great success.
+
+Remembering his experiences with Tom Thumb at Oxford and
+Cambridge, and knowing the fondness of the college men for
+joking, Barnum made up his mind to endure any amount of friendly
+chaff when he visited their cities.
+
+He commenced at Cambridge, where he was greeted with a crowded
+house, composed largely of under-graduates. Soon after he began
+to speak, one of the young men called out: "Where is Joice Heth?"
+to which Barnum replied: "Young gentleman, please to restrain
+yourself till the close of the lecture, when I shall take great
+pleasure in affording you all the information I possess
+concerning your deceased relative."
+
+This turned the laugh against the youthful inquirer, and kept the
+students quiet for a few moments. Questions of a similar
+character were occasionally propounded and as promptly answered,
+and on the whole the lecture was interrupted less than Barnum had
+anticipated, while the receipts were over one hundred pounds
+sterling.
+
+At Oxford the hall was filled to suffocation half an hour before
+the time announced for the lecture to begin, and the sale of
+tickets was stopped.
+
+Barnum therefore stepped upon the platform, and said: "Ladies and
+gentlemen: as every seat is now occupied and the ticket-office is
+closed, I propose to begin my lecture now and not keep you
+waiting till the advertised hour."
+
+"Good for you, old Barnum,"--"Time is money,"--"Nothing like
+economy," yelled the audience. Holding up his hand for silence,
+Barnum proceeded:
+
+"Young gentlemen, I have a word or two to say, in order that we
+may have a thorough understanding between ourselves at the
+outset. I see symptoms of a pretty jolly time here this evening,
+and you have paid me liberally for the single hour of my time,
+which is at your service. I am an old traveller and an old
+showman, and I like to please my patrons. Now, it is quite
+immaterial to me; you may furnish the entertainment for the hour,
+or I will endeavor to do so, or we will take portions of the time
+by turns --you supplying a part of the amusement and I a part--as
+we say sometimes in America, 'you pays your money, and you takes
+your choice.' "
+
+This frankness pleased the students, who agreed to this unique
+proposition unhesitatingly.
+
+The lecture proceeded for fifteen minutes, when a voice called
+out: "Come, old chap! you must be tired by this time. Hold up now
+till we sing Yankee Doodle." Whereupon they all joined in that
+honorable song with lusty good-will, Barnum meanwhile sitting
+down comfortably, to show them that he was quite satisfied with
+their manner of passing the time. When the song was concluded,
+the leader of the party said: "Now, Mr. Barnum, you may go ahead
+again."
+
+The lecture went on, or rather A lecture, for Barnum began to
+adapt his remarks to the occasion. Every few minutes would come
+some interruption, which was always as much enjoyed by Barnum as
+by the audience. When the entertainment concluded, the young men
+crowded to the platform to shake hands with the speaker,
+declaring that they had had a "jolly good time," while the leader
+said: "Stay with us a week, Barnum, and we'll dine you, wine you,
+and give you full houses every night."
+
+Barnum would have accepted the invitation had he not been
+announced to lecture in London the next evening, and he told the
+students so. They asked him all sorts of questions about America,
+the Museum and other shows, and expressed the hope that he would
+come out of his troubles all right.
+
+At least a score of them invited him to breakfast with them the
+next morning, but he declined, until one young gentleman insisted
+on personal grounds. "My dear sir," said he, "you must breakfast
+with me. I have almost split my throat here to-night, and it is
+only fair for you to repay me by coming to see me in the
+morning." This appeal was irresistible, and Barnum agreed to
+come.
+
+The boys were pleased with his nerve and good nature, but they
+confided to him that they liked better to get people angry. A few
+weeks before Howard Paul had left them in disgust, because they
+insisted on smoking when his wife was on the stage. They added
+that the entertainment was excellent, and Howard Paul might have
+made a thousand pounds if he had kept his temper.
+
+Some time later Barnum was offered L1,200, or $6,000, for the
+copyright of his lecture; the offer was, however, refused.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXX. AN ENTERPRISING ENGLISHMAN.
+
+A NEW FRIEND--DINNER TO TOM THUMB AND COMMODORE NUTT--MEASURING
+THE GIANT--THE TWO ENGINES.
+
+The morning after the lecture in Manchester a gentleman named
+John Fish called at the hotel where Barnum was staying. He said
+that he had attended the lecture the evening before, and added
+that he was pretty well acquainted with the lecturer, having read
+his autobiography. He went on to say that he was joint proprietor
+with another gentleman in a cotton-mill near Manchester,
+"although," he said, "a few years ago I was working as a
+journeyman, and probably should have been at this time had I not
+read your book."
+
+Observing Mr. Barnum's surprise, he continued:
+
+"The fact is, Mr. Barnum, upon reading your autobiography, I
+thought I perceived you tried to make yourself out worse than you
+really were; for I discovered a pleasant spirit and a good heart
+under the rougher exterior in which you chose to present yourself
+to the public; but," he added, "after reading your life, I found
+myself in possession of renewed strength, and awakened energies
+and aspirations, and I said to myself, 'Why can't I go ahead and
+make money, as Barnum did? He commenced without money and
+succeeded; why may not I?' In this train of thought," he
+continued, "I went to a newspaper office and advertised for a
+partner with money to join me in establishing a cotton-mill. I
+had no applications, and, remembering your experiences when you
+had money and wanted a partner, I spent half a crown in a similar
+experiment. I advertised for a partner to join a man who had
+plenty of capital. Then I had lots of applicants ready to
+introduce me into all sorts of occupations, from that of a banker
+to that of a horsejockey or gambler, if I would only furnish the
+money to start with. After a while, I advertised again for a
+partner, and obtained one with money. We have a good mill. I
+devote myself closely to business, and have been very successful.
+I know every line in your book; so, indeed, do several members of
+my family; and I have conducted my business on the principles
+laid down in your published 'Rules for Money-making.' I find them
+correct principles; and, sir, I have sought this interview in
+order to thank you for publishing your autobiography, and to tell
+you that to that act of yours I attribute my present position in
+life."
+
+"Your statement is certainly flattering," said Mr. Barnum, "and I
+am glad if I have been able in any manner, through my
+experiences, to aid you in starting in life. But I presume your
+genius would have found vent in time if I had not written the
+book."
+
+"No, indeed, it would not," he replied, in an earnest tone; "I am
+sure I should have worked as a mill-hand all my life if it had
+not been for you. Oh, I have made no secret of it," he continued;
+"the commercial men with whom I deal know all about it; indeed,
+they call me 'Barnum' on 'change here in Manchester."
+
+On one occasion, when General Tom Thumb exhibited in Bury, Mr.
+Fish closed his mill, and gave each of his employees a ticket to
+the exhibition; out of respect, as he said, to Barnum. On a
+subsequent occasion, when the little General visited England the
+last time, Mr. Fish invited him, his wife, Commodore Nutt, Minnie
+Warren, and the managers of "the show," to a splendid and
+sumptuous dinner at his house, which the distinguished little
+party enjoyed exceedingly.
+
+Soon after his return to America, Barnum read an account of a
+French giant then exhibiting in Paris, and said to be over eight
+feet in height. As this was considerably taller than anything
+that the showman had ever beheld, he wrote to his friend Fish,
+who had expressed a wish to do him any service in his power, and
+requested him to go to Paris, and, by actual measurement, find
+out the exact height of the giant. He inclosed an offer,
+arranging the prices on a sliding scale, commencing at eight
+feet, and descending to seven feet two inches, for if he were not
+taller than that he was not to be desired.
+
+Mr. Fish put a two-foot rule in his pocket, and started for
+Paris, where, after several days' delay and much trouble beside,
+he finally succeeded in gaining an interview. The giant was shown
+Barnum's letter, and read the tempting offers made for his
+services, provided he measured eight feet, or within six inches
+of that height.
+
+"Oh, I measure over eight feet," said he.
+
+"Very likely," responded Mr. Fish, "but you see my orders are to
+measure you."
+
+"There's no need of that; you can see for yourself," stretching
+himself up a few inches by aid of a peculiar knack which giants
+and dwarfs possess to increase or diminish their apparent
+stature.
+
+"No doubt you are right," persisted Mr. Fish, "but you see I must
+obey orders, and if I am not permitted to measure you I shall not
+engage you."
+
+"Well," said the giant, "if you can't take my word for it, look
+at that door. You see my head is more than two feet above the top
+(giving his neck a severe stretch); just measure the door."
+
+But Mr. Fish refused. The giant was now desperate, and,
+stretching himself up to his full height, exclaimed: "Well, be
+quick! Put your rule to my feet and measure me; but hurry up,
+please!"
+
+Mr. Fish regarded him coolly. "Look here!" said he, "this sort of
+thing won't do, you know. I don't understand this contrivance
+around the soles of your boots, but it seems to me you've got a
+set of springs there which aids your height when you desire it.
+Now I will not stand any more nonsense. If I engage you at all,
+you must first take off your boots, and lie flat upon your back
+in the middle of the floor."
+
+The giant protested, but Mr. Fish was firm, and at last he slowly
+took off his coat and lay down on the floor. Mr. Fish applied his
+rule, and to his own astonishment and the giant's indignation the
+latter proved to be barely seven feet one and one-half inches. So
+he was not engaged at all.
+
+Some time afterwards Barnum wrote to his friend and asked his
+permission to put him into a new book then in course of
+preparation. He wrote in return the following characteristic
+letter:
+
+Had I made a fortune of L100,000 I should have been proud of a
+place in your Autobiography; but as I have only been able to make
+(here he named a sum which in this country would be considered
+almost a fortune), I feel I should be out of place in your pages;
+at all events, if you mention me at all, draw it mildly, if you
+please.
+
+The American war has made sad havoc in our trade, and it is only
+by close attention to business that I have lately been at all
+successful. I have built a place for one thousand looms, and
+have, as you know, put in a pair of engines, which I have named
+"Barnum" and "Charity." Each engine has its name engraved on two
+large brass plates at either end of the cylinder, which has often
+caused much mirth when I have explained the circumstances to
+visitors. I started and christened "Charity" on the 14th of
+January last, and she has saved me L12 per month in coals ever
+since. The steam from the boiler goes first to "Charity" (she is
+high pressure), and "Barnum" only gets the steam after she has
+done with it. He has to work at low pressure (a condensing
+engine), and the result is a saving. Barnum was extravagant when
+he took steam direct, but since I fixed Charity betwixt him and
+the boiler, he can only get what she gives him. This reminds me
+that you state in your "Life" you could always make money, but
+formerly did not save it. Perhaps you never took care of it till
+Charity became Chancellor of Exchequer. When I visited you at the
+Bull Hotel, in Blackburn, you pointed to General Tom Thumb, and
+said: "That is my piece of goods; I have sold it hundreds of
+thousands of times, and have never yet delivered it!" That was
+ten years ago, in 1858. If I had been doing the same with my
+pieces of calico, I must have been wealthy by this time; but I
+have been hammering at one (cotton) nail several months, and, as
+it did not offer to clinch, I was almost tempted to doubt one of
+your "rules," and thought I would drive at some other nail; but,
+on reflection, I knew I understood cotton better than anything
+else, and so I back up your rule and stick to cotton, not
+doubting it will be all right and successful.
+
+Mr. Fish was one of the large class of English manufacturers who
+suffered seriously from the effects of the rebellion in the
+United States. As an Englishman, he could not have a patriot's
+interest in the progress of that terrible struggle; but he made a
+practical exhibition of sympathy for the suffering soldiers, in a
+pleasant and characteristic manner.
+
+At the great Sanitary Fair in New York, during the war, Mr. Fish
+sent two monster "Simuel cakes," covered with miniature forts,
+cannon, armies, and all the panoply of war, which attracted great
+attention from every one present.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXI. AT HOME AGAIN.
+
+THE CLOCK DEBTS PAID--THE MUSEUM ONCE MORE UNDER BARNUM'S
+MANAGEMENT--ENTHUSIASTIC RECEPTION--HIS SPEECH--TWO POEMS.
+
+In 1859, Barnum returned to the United States. During his trip
+abroad he had secured many novelties for the Museum, the Albino
+Family, Thiodon's Mechanical Theatre, and others.
+
+These afforded him a liberal commission, and he had beside made
+considerable money from the Tom Thumb exhibitions and his
+lectures.
+
+All this, his wife's income, as well as a large sum derived from
+the sale of some of her property, was faithfully devoted to the
+one object of their lives--paying off the clock debts.
+
+Mrs. Barnum and her daughter, Pauline, had either boarded in
+Bridgeport or lived in a small house in the suburbs during the
+entire four years of struggle. The land purchased by Mrs. Barnum
+at the assignee's sale in East Bridgeport had increased in value
+meanwhile, and they felt justified in borrowing on it, some of
+the single lots were sold, and all this money went toward the
+discharge of the debts.
+
+At last, in March, 1860, all the clock indebtedness was
+extinguished, except $20,000, which Barnum bound himself to take
+up within a certain time, his friend James D. Johnson
+guaranteeing his bond to that effect.
+
+On the seventeenth day of March, Messrs. Butler and Greenwood
+signed an agreement to sell and deliver to Barnum on the
+following Saturday their entire good-will and interest in the
+Museum collection. This fact was thoroughly circulated, and
+blazing posters, placards, and advertisements announced that
+"Barnum is on his feet again." It was furthermore stated that the
+Museum would be closed for one week, opening March 31st, under
+the management and proprietorship of its original owner. It was
+also promised that Barnum would address the audience on the night
+of closing.
+
+The Museum, decked in its holiday dress of flags and banners, was
+crowded to its utmost capacity when Barnum made his appearance.
+His reception was an enthusiastic one, cheers and shouts rent the
+air, and tears filled the showman's eyes as he thought of this
+triumphant conclusion of his four years' struggle.
+
+Recovering himself, he bowed his acknowledgments for the
+reception, and addressed the audience as follows:
+
+"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN: I should be more or less than human, if I
+could meet this unexpected and overwhelming testimonial at your
+hands, without the deepest emotion. My own personal connection
+with the Museum is now resumed, and I avail myself of the
+circumstance to say why it is so. Never did I feel stronger in my
+worldly prosperity than in September, 1855. Three months later I
+was so deeply embarrassed that I felt certain of nothing, except
+the uncertainty of everything. A combination of singular efforts
+and circumstances tempted me to put faith in a certain clock
+manufacturing company, and I placed my signature to papers which
+ultimately broke me down. After nearly five years of hard
+struggle to keep my head above water, I have touched bottom at
+last, and here to-night I am happy to announce that I have waded
+ashore. Every clock debt of which I have any knowledge has been
+provided for. Perhaps, after the troubles and turmoils I have
+experienced, I should feel no desire to re-engage in the
+excitements of business; but a man like myself, less than fifty
+years of age, and enjoying robust health, is scarcely old enough
+to be embalmed and put in a glass case in the Museum as one of
+its million of curiosities. 'It is better to wear out than rust
+out.' Besides, if a man of active temperament is not busy, he is
+apt to get into mischief. To avoid evil, therefore, and since
+business activity is a necessity of my nature, here I am, once
+more, in the Museum, and among those with whom I have been so
+long and so pleasantly identified. I am confident of a cordial
+welcome, and hence feel some claim to your indulgence while I
+briefly allude to the means of my present deliverance from utter
+financial ruin. Need I say, in the first place, that I am
+somewhat indebted to the forbearance of generous creditors. In
+the next place, permit me to speak of sympathizing friends, whose
+volunteered loans and exertions vastly aided my rescue. When my
+day of sorrow came, I first paid or secured every debt I owed of
+a personal nature. This done, I felt bound in honor to give up
+all of my property that remained toward liquidating my 'clock
+debts.' I placed it in the hands of trustees and receivers for
+the benefit of all the 'clock' creditors. But at the forced sale
+of my Connecticut real estate, there was a purchaser behind the
+screen, of whom the world had little knowledge. In the day of my
+prosperity I made over to my wife much valuable property,
+including the lease of this Museum building--a lease then having
+about twenty-two years to run, and enhanced in value to more than
+double its original worth. I sold the Museum collection to
+Messrs. Greenwood & Butler, subject to my wife's separate
+interest in the lease, and she has received more than $80,000
+over and above the sums paid to the owners of the building.
+Instead of selfishly applying this amount to private purposes, my
+family lived with a due regard to economy, and the savings
+(strictly belonging to my wife) were devoted to buying in
+portions of my estate at the assignees' sales and to purchasing
+'clock notes' bearing my indorsements. The Christian name of my
+wife is Charity. I may well acknowledge, therefore, that I am not
+only a proper 'subject of charity,' but that 'without Charity, I
+am nothing.'
+
+"But, ladies and gentlemen, while Charity thus labored in my
+behalf, Faith and Hope were not idle. I have been anything but
+indolent during the last four years. Driven from pillar to post,
+and annoyed beyond description by all sorts of legal claims and
+writs, I was perusing protests and summonses by day, and dreaming
+of clocks run down by night. My head was ever whizzing with
+dislocated cog-wheels and broken main-springs; my whole mind (and
+my credit) was running upon tick, and everything pressing on me
+like a dead weight.
+
+"In this state of affairs I felt that I was of no use on this
+side of the Atlantic, so, giving the pendulum a swing, and
+seizing time by the forelock, I went to Europe. There I furtively
+pulled the wires of several exhibitions, among which that of Tom
+Thumb may be mentioned for example. I managed a variety of
+musical and commercial speculations in Great Britain, Germany,
+and Holland. These enterprises, together with the net profits of
+my public lectures, enabled me to remit large sums to
+confidential agents for the purchase of my obligations. In this
+manner, I quietly extinguished, little by little, every dollar of
+my clock liabilities. I could not have achieved this difficult
+feat, however, without the able assistance of enthusiastic
+friends--and among the chief of them let me gratefully
+acknowledge the invaluable services of Mr. James D. Johnson, a
+gentleman of wealth, in Bridgeport, Connecticut. Other gentlemen
+have been generous with me. Some have loaned me large sums
+without security, and have placed me under obligations which must
+ever command my honest gratitude "but Mr. Johnson has been a
+'friend in deed,' for he has been truly a 'friend in need.'
+
+"You must not infer, from what I have said, that I have
+completely recovered from the stunning blow to which I was
+subjected four years ago. I have lost more in the way of tens of
+thousands, yes, hundreds of thousands, than I care to remember. A
+valuable portion of my real estate in Connecticut, however, has
+been preserved, and as I feel all the ardor of twenty years ago,
+and the prospect here is so flattering, my heart is animated with
+the hope of ultimately, by enterprise and activity, obliterating
+unpleasant reminiscences, and retrieving the losses of the past.
+Experience, too, has taught me not only that, even in the matter
+of money, 'enough is as good as a feast,' but that there are, in
+this world, some things vastly better than the Almighty Dollar!
+Possibly I may contemplate, at times, the painful day when I said
+'Othello's occupation's gone'; but I shall the more frequently
+cherish the memory of this moment, when I am permitted to
+announce that Richard's himself again.'
+
+"Many people have wondered that a man considered so acute as
+myself should have been deluded into embarrassments like mine,
+and not a few have declared, in short meter, that 'Barnum was a
+fool.' I can only reply that I never made pretensions to the
+sharpness of a pawnbroker, and I hope I shall never so entirely
+lose confidence in human nature as to consider every man a scamp
+by instinct, or a rogue by necessity. 'It is better to be
+deceived sometimes, than to distrust always,' says Lord Bacon,
+and I agree with him.
+
+"Experience is said to be a hard schoolmaster, but I should be
+sorry to feel that this great lesson in adversity has not brought
+forth fruits of some value. I needed the discipline this
+tribulation has given me, and I really feel, after all, that
+this, like many other apparent evils, was only a blessing in
+disguise. Indeed, I may mention that the very clock factory which
+I built in Bridgeport for the purpose of bringing hundreds of
+workmen to that city, has been purchased and quadrupled in size
+by the Wheeler & Wilson Sewing-Machine Company, and is now filled
+with intelligent New England mechanics, whose families add two
+thousand to the population, and who are doing a great work in
+building up and beautifying that flourishing city. So that the
+same concern which prostrated me seems destined as a most
+important agent toward my recuperation. I am certain that the
+popular sympathy has been with me from the beginning; and this,
+together with a consciousness of rectitude, is more than an
+offset to all the vicissitudes to which I have been subjected.
+
+"In conclusion, I beg to assure you and the public that my chief
+pleasure, while health and strength are spared me, will be to
+cater for your and their healthy amusement and instruction. In
+future, such capabilities as I possess will be devoted to the
+maintenance of this Museum as a popular place of family resort,
+in which all that is novel and interesting shall be gathered from
+the four quarters of the globe, and which ladies and children may
+visit at all times unattended, without danger of encountering
+anything of an objectionable nature. The dramas introduced in the
+Lecture Room will never contain a profane expression or a vulgar
+allusion; on the contrary, their tendency will always be to
+encourage virtue and frown upon vice.
+
+"I have established connections in Europe, which will enable me
+to produce here a succession of interesting novelties otherwise
+inaccessible. Although I shall be personally present much of the
+time, and hope to meet many of my old acquaintances, as well as
+to form many new ones, I am sure you will be glad to learn that I
+have re-secured the services of one of the late proprietors, and
+the active manager of this Museum, Mr. John Greenwood, Jr. As he
+is a modest gentleman, who would be the last to praise himself,
+allow me to add that he is one to whose successful qualities as a
+caterer for the popular entertainments, the crowds that have
+often filled this building may well bear testimony. But, more
+than this, he is the unobtrusive one to whose integrity,
+diligence, and devotion I owe much of my present position of
+self-congratulation. Mr. Greenwood will hereafter act as
+assistant manager, while his late co-partner, Mr. Butler, has
+engaged in another branch of business. Once more, thanking you
+all for your kind welcome, I bid you, till the re-opening, 'an
+affectionate adieu.' "
+
+The speech was received with wild enthusiasm, and after the
+re-opening of the Museum the number of visitors was at once
+almost doubled.
+
+Among the many newspaper congratulations he received, none gave
+Barnum more pleasure than a poem from his old admirer on the
+Boston Saturday Evening Gazette.
+
+ANOTHER WORD FOR BARNUM.
+
+ Barnum, your hand! The struggle o'er,
+     You face the world and ask no favor;
+ You stand where you have stood before,
+     The old salt hasn't lost its savor.
+ You now can laugh with friends, at foes'
+     Ne'er heeding Mrs. Grundy's tattle;
+ You've dealt and taken sturdy blows,
+     Regardless of the rabble's prattle.
+
+  Not yours the heart to harbor ill
+     'Gainst those who've dealt in trivial jesting;
+ You pass them with the same good will
+     Erst shown when they their wit were testing.
+You're the same Barnum that we knew,
+     You're good for years, still fit for labor,
+ Be as of old, be bold and true,
+     Honest as man, as friend, as neighbor.
+
+At about this period, the following poem was published in a
+Pottsville, Pa., paper, and copied by many journals of the-day:
+
+A HEALTH TO BARNUM.
+
+ Companions! fill your glasses round
+     And drink a health to one
+ Who has few coming after him,
+     To do as he has done;
+ Who made a fortune for himself,
+     Made fortunes, too, for many,
+ Yet wronged no bosom of a sigh,
+     No pocket of a penny.
+ Come! shout a gallant chorus,
+     And make the glasses ring,
+ Here's health and luck to Barnum!
+     The Exhibition King.
+
+  Who lured the Swedish Nightingale
+     To Western woods to come?
+ Who prosperous and happy made
+     The life of little Thumb?
+ Who oped Amusement's golden door
+     So cheaply to the crowd,
+ And taught Morality to smile
+     On all HIS stage allowed?
+ Come! shout a gallant chorus,
+     Until the glasses ring--
+ Here's health and luck to Barnum!
+     The Exhibition King.
+
+  And when the sad reverses came,
+     As come they may to all,
+ Who stood a Hero, bold and true,
+     Amid his fortune's fall?
+ Who to the utmost yielded up
+     What Honor could not keep,
+ Then took the field of life again
+     With courage calm and deep?
+ Come! shout a gallant chorus,
+     Until the glasses dance--
+ Here's health and luck to Barnum,
+     The Napoleon of Finance
+
+ Yet, no--OUR hero would not look
+     With smiles on such a cup;
+ Throw out the wine--with water clear,
+     Fill the pure crystal up
+ Then rise, and greet with deep respect,
+     The courage he has shown,
+ And drink to him who well deserves
+     A seat on Fortune's throne.
+ Here's health and luck to Barnum!
+     An ELBA he has seen,
+ And never may his map of life
+     Display a ST HELENE!
+
+It is of interest to observe that the phrase "Napoleon of
+Finance," which has in recent years been applied to several Wall
+Street speculators, was first coined in honorable description of
+Phineas T. Barnum, because of his honesty as well as his signal
+success.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXII. THE STORY OF "GRIZZLY ADAMS."
+
+BARNUM'S PARTNERSHIP WITH THE FAMOUS BEAR HUNTER--FOOLING HIM
+WITH THE "GOLDEN PIGEONS"--ADAMS EARNS $500 AT DESPERATE
+COST--TRICKING BARNUM OUT OF A FINE HUNTING SUIT--PROSPERITY OF
+THE MUSEUM--VISIT OF THE PRINCE OF WALES.
+
+The famous old American Museum was now the centre of Barnum's
+interests, and he devoted himself to its development with such
+energy as never before. His enterprise in securing new
+curiosities, and his skill in presenting them to the public in
+the most attractive light, surpassed all previous efforts. To his
+office, as to their Mecca, flocked all the "freaks" of the land,
+and all who possessed any objects of rare or marvelous nature.
+Foremost among these visitors was one veteran frontiersman, who
+had attained--and well deserved--much fame as a fighter of the
+most savage wild beasts. His name was James C. Adams, but he was
+universally known as "Grizzly Adams," from the fact that he had
+captured a great many grizzly bears at the risk and cost of
+fearful encounters and perils. He was brave, and with his bravery
+there was enough of the romantic in his nature to make him a real
+hero. For many years a hunter and trapper in the Rocky and Sierra
+Nevada Mountains, he acquired a recklessness, which, added to his
+natural invincible courage, rendered him one of the most striking
+men of the age, and he was emphatically a man of pluck. A month
+after Barnum had re-purchased the Museum, Adams arrived in New
+York with his famous collection of California animals, captured
+by himself, consisting of twenty or thirty immense grizzly bears,
+at the head of which stood "Old Samson," together with several
+wolves, half a dozen different species of California bears,
+California lions, tigers, buffalo, elk, and "Old Neptune," the
+great sea-lion from the Pacific.
+
+Old Adams had trained all these monsters so that with him they
+were as docile as kittens, though many of the most ferocious
+among them would attack a stranger without hesitation, if he came
+within their grasp. In fact, the training of these animals was no
+fool's play, as Old Adams learned to his cost, for the terrific
+blows which he received from time to time, while teaching them
+"docility," finally cost him his life.
+
+Adams called on Barnum immediately on his arrival in New York. He
+was dressed in his hunter's suit of buckskin, trimmed with the
+skins and bordered with the hanging tails of small Rocky Mountain
+animals; his cap consisting of the skin of a wolf's head and
+shoulders, from which depended several tails, and under which
+appeared his stiff bushy, gray hair and his long, white, grizzly
+beard; in fact, Old Adams was quite as much of a show as his
+beasts. They had come around Cape Horn on the clipper ship
+"Golden Fleece," and a sea voyage of three and a half months had
+probably not added much to the beauty or neat appearance of the
+old bear-hunter. During their conversation Grizzly Adams took off
+his cap, and showed Barnum the top of his head. His skull was
+literally broken in. It had, on various occasions, been struck by
+the fearful paws of his grizzly students; and the last blow, from
+the bear called "General Fremont," had laid open his brain so
+that its workings were plainly visible. Barnum remarked that he
+thought it was a dangerous wound and might possibly prove fatal.
+
+"Yes," replied Adams, "that will fix me out. It had nearly
+healed; but old Fremont opened it for me, for the third or fourth
+time, before I left California, and he did his business so
+thoroughly, I'm a used-up man. However, I reckon I may live six
+months or a year yet." This was spoken as coolly as if he had
+been talking about the life of a dog.
+
+This extraordinary man had come to see Barnum about the
+"California Menagerie," of which he, Adams, was the owner. Barnum
+had shortly before, however, purchased one-half interest in it
+from a man who had claimed to be Adams's equal partner. This
+Adams disputed, declaring that he had merely borrowed from the
+man some money on the security of the show, that the man was not
+his partner, and that he had no right to sell one-half or any
+portion of the menagerie. As a matter of fact, however, the man
+did have a bill of sale for one-half of the show, and Adams was
+soon convinced that Barnum's purchase was entirely legitimate.
+The result was that Barnum and Adams formed a regular
+partnership, the former to attend to all business affairs, the
+latter to exhibit the animals. The show was opened in a huge
+canvas tent on Broadway, at the corner of Thirteenth Street.
+
+On the morning of opening, a band of music preceded a procession
+of animal cages down Broadway and up the Bowery, old Adams,
+dressed in his hunting costume, heading the line, with a platform
+wagon on which were placed three immense grizzly bears, two of
+which he held by chains, while he was mounted on the back of the
+largest grizzly, which stood in the centre and was not secured in
+any manner whatever. This was the bear known as "General
+Fremont," and so docile had he become that Adams said he had used
+him as a pack-bear, to carry his cooking and hunting apparatus
+through the mountains for six months, and had ridden him hundreds
+of miles. But apparently docile as were many of these animals,
+there was not one among them that would not occasionally give
+Adams a sly blow or a sly bite when a good chance offered; hence
+old Adams was but a wreck of his former self, and expressed
+pretty nearly the truth when he said:
+
+"Mr. Barnum, I am not the man I was five years ago. Then I felt
+able to stand the hug of any grizzly living, and was always glad
+to encounter, single handed, any sort of an animal that dared
+present himself. But I have been beaten to a jelly, torn almost
+limb from limb, and nearly chawed up and spit out by these
+treacherous grizzly bears. However, I am good for a few months
+yet, and by that time I hope we shall gain enough to make my old
+woman comfortable, for I have been absent from her some years."
+
+His wife came from Massachusetts to New York and nursed him. Dr.
+Johns dressed his wounds every day, and not only told Adams he
+could never recover, but assured his friends that probably a very
+few weeks would lay him in his grave. But Adams was as firm as
+adamant and as resolute as a lion. Among the thousands who saw
+him dressed in his grotesque hunter's suit, and witnessed the
+seeming vigor with which he "performed" the savage monsters,
+beating and whipping them into apparently the most perfect
+docility, probably not one suspected that this rough,
+fierce-looking, powerful semi-savage, as he appeared to be, was
+suffering intense pain from his broken skull and fevered system,
+and that nothing kept him from stretching himself on his
+death-bed but his most indomitable and extraordinary will.
+
+Adams was an inveterate story-teller, and often "drew the long
+bow" with daring hand. He loved to astonish people with
+extraordinary tales, which were sheer inventions, but which no
+one could disprove. He pretended, too, to have been everywhere
+and to have seen everything. This weakness made him good game for
+Barnum, who determined to expose his foibles to him at the first
+opportunity. The opportunity soon came. One day, amid the
+innumerable caravan of cranks that moved to the weird realm of
+Barnum's wonder-house, there appeared a fat, stolid German,
+carrying in his hand a small basket, which he guarded with
+jealous care.
+
+"I have come," he said, "to see if you would not like some golden
+pigeons to buy?"
+
+"Yes," Barnum replied, "I would like a flock of golden pigeons,
+if I could buy them for their weight in silver; for there are no
+'golden pigeons' in existence, unless they are made from the pure
+metal."
+
+"You shall some golden pigeons alive see," he replied, at the
+same time entering the office, and closing the door after him. He
+then removed the lid from the basket, and sure enough, there were
+snugly ensconced a pair of beautiful, living ruff-necked pigeons,
+as yellow as saffron, and as bright as a double-eagle fresh from
+the Mint.
+
+Barnum was somewhat staggered at this sight, and quickly asked
+the man where those birds came from. A dull, lazy smile crawled
+over the sober face of the German visitor, as he replied in a
+slow, guttural tone of voice:
+
+"What you think yourself?"
+
+Catching his meaning, Barnum quickly replied:
+
+"I think it is a humbug."
+
+"Of course, I know you will so say; because you 'forstha' such
+things; so I shall not try to humbug you; I have them myself
+colored."
+
+It then came out that the man was a chemist, and that he had
+invented a process by which he could dye the feathers of living
+birds any color he pleased, retaining at the same time all the
+natural gloss of the plumage. Barnum at once closed a bargain
+with him for the birds, for ten dollars, and then put them in his
+"Happy Family" at the Museum. He marked them "Golden Pigeons,
+from California," and then gleefully awaited Adams' next visit,
+feeling sure that the old fellow would be completely taken in.
+
+Sure enough, next morning Adams came along, saw the pigeons,
+looked at them earnestly for a few minutes, and then went
+straight to the office.
+
+"Mr. Barnum," said he, "you must let me have those California
+pigeons."
+
+"I can't spare them," said Barnum.
+
+"But you must spare them. All the birds and animals from
+California ought to be together. You own half of my California
+menagerie, and you must lend me those pigeons."
+
+"Mr. Adams, they are too rare and valuable a bird to be hawked
+about in that manner."
+
+"Oh, don't be a fool," replied Adams. "Rare bird, indeed! Why,
+they are just as common in California as any other pigeon! I
+could have brought a hundred of them from San Francisco, if I had
+thought of it."
+
+"But why did you not think of it?" with a suppressed smile.
+
+"Because they are so common there," said Adams. "I did not think
+they would be any curiosity here."
+
+Barnum was ready to burst with laughter to see how readily Adams
+swallowed the bait, but, maintaining the most rigid gravity, he
+replied:
+
+"Oh! well, Mr. Adams, if they are really so common in California,
+you had probably better take them, and you may write over and
+have half a dozen pairs sent to me for the Museum."
+
+A few weeks later Barnum, being in the California Menagerie,
+noticed that something ailed the pigeons. They had a
+sadly-mottled appearance. Their feathers had grown out, and they
+were half white. Adams had not yet noticed it, being too busy
+with his bears. But Barnum called him at once to the pigeon cage.
+
+"Look here, Adams," he said, "I'm afraid you are going to lose
+your Golden Pigeons. They must be very sick. Just see how pale
+they look! Good thing they're so common in California, so you can
+easily get some more, eh?"
+
+Adams looked at them a moment in astonishment, then turning to
+Barnum, and seeing that he could not suppress a smile, he
+indignantly exclaimed:
+
+"Blast the Golden Pigeons! You had better take them back to the
+Museum. You can't humbug me with your painted pigeons!"
+
+This was too much, and Barnum laughed till he cried, to witness
+the mixed look of astonishment and vexation which marked the
+grizzly features of old Adams.
+
+After the exhibition on Thirteenth Street and Broadway had been
+open six weeks, the doctor insisted that Adams should sell out
+his share in the animals and settle up his worldly affairs, for
+he assured him that he was growing weaker every day, and his
+earthly existence must soon terminate. "I shall live a good deal
+longer than you doctors think for," replied Adams, doggedly; and
+then, seeming after all to realize the truth of the doctor's
+assertion, he turned and said: "Well, Mr. Barnum, you must buy me
+out."
+
+A bargain was soon concluded. Arrangements had been made to
+exhibit the bears in Connecticut and Massachusetts during the
+summer, in connection with the Museum, and Adams insisted that
+Barnum should engage him to travel for the season and manage the
+bears. He offered to do it for $60 a week and expenses. Barnum
+replied that he would gladly make such an arrangement, but he
+feared Adams was not strong enough to stand it.
+
+"You are growing weaker every day," he said; "and would better go
+to your home and rest."
+
+"What will you give me extra if I will travel and exhibit the
+bears every day for ten weeks?" added old Adams, eagerly.
+
+"Five hundred dollars."
+
+"Done!" exclaimed Adams, "I will do it, so draw up an agreement
+to that effect at once. But mind you, draw it payable to my wife,
+for I may be too weak to attend to business after the ten weeks
+are up, and if I perform my part of the contract, I want her to
+get the $500 without any trouble."
+
+Barnum drew up a contract to pay him $60 per week for his
+services, and if he continued to exhibit the bears for ten
+consecutive weeks, to hand him, or his wife, $500 extra.
+
+"You have lost your $500!" exclaimed Adams on taking the
+contract; "for I am bound to live and earn it."
+
+"I hope you may, with all my heart, and a hundred years more if
+you desire it," replied Barnum.
+
+"Call me a fool if I don't earn the $500!" exclaimed Adams, with
+a triumphant laugh.
+
+The "show" started off in a few days, and at the end of a
+fortnight Barnum met it at Hartford, Connecticut.
+
+"Well" said he, "Adams, you seem to stand it pretty well. I hope
+you and your wife are comfortable?"
+
+"Yes," he replied with a laugh; "and you may as well try to be
+comfortable, too, for your $500 is a goner."
+
+"All right," Barnum replied, "I hope you will grow better every
+day."
+
+But the case was hopeless. Adams was dying. When Barnum met him
+three weeks later at New Bedford his eyes were glassy and his
+hands trembling, but his courage and will were strong as ever.
+
+"This hot weather tells on me," he said, "but I'll last the ten
+weeks and more, and get your $500."
+
+Barnum urged him to quit work, to take half of the $500 and go
+home. But, no. He would not listen to it. And he did actually
+serve through the whole ten weeks, and got the $500; remarking,
+as he pocketed the cash,
+
+"Barnum, it's too bad you're a teetotaler, for I'd like to stand
+treat with you on this."
+
+When Adams set out on this last tour, Barnum had a fine new
+hunting-suit made of beaver-skins. He had procured it for Herr
+Driesbach, the animal tamer, whom he had engaged to take Adams'
+place whenever the latter should give out. Adams had asked him to
+loan him the suit, to wear occasionally when he had great
+audiences, as his own suit was badly worn. Barnum did so; and at
+the end of the engagement, as he received the $500, Adams said:
+
+"Mr. Barnum, I suppose you are going to give me this new
+hunting-dress."
+
+"Oh, no," Barnum replied, "I got that for your successor, who
+will exhibit the bears to-morrow, besides, you have no possible
+use for it."
+
+"Now, don't be mean, but lend me the dress, if you won't give it
+to me, for I want to wear it home to my native village."
+
+Barnum could not refuse the poor old man anything, and he
+therefore replied:
+
+"Well, Adams, I will lend you the dress, but you will send it
+back to me?"
+
+"Yes, when I have done with it," he replied, with an evident
+chuckle of triumph.
+
+Barnum thought, "he will soon be done with it," and replied:
+"That's all right."
+
+A new idea evidently struck Adams, for, with a brightening look
+of satisfaction, he said:
+
+"Now, Barnum, you have made a good thing out of the California
+menagerie, and so have I; but you will make a heap more. So if
+you won't give me this new hunter's dress, just draw a little
+writing, and sign it, saying that I may wear it until I have done
+with it."
+
+Barnum knew that in a few days, at longest, he would be "done"
+with this world altogether, and, to gratify him, he cheerfully
+drew and signed the paper.
+
+"Come, old Yankee, I've got you this time--see. if I hadn't!"
+exclaimed Adams, with a broad grin, as he took the paper.
+
+Barnum smiled, and said:
+
+"All right, my dear fellow; the longer you live the better I
+shall like it,"
+
+They parted, and Adams went to Charlton, Worcester County,
+Massachusetts, where his wife and daughter lived. He took at once
+to his bed, and never rose from it again. The excitement had
+passed away, and his vital energies could accomplish no more, The
+fifth day after arriving home, the physician told him he could
+not live until the next morning. He received the announcement in
+perfect calmness, and with the most apparent indifference; then,
+turning to his wife, with a smile he requested her to have him
+buried in the new hunting-suit. "For," said he, "Barnum agreed to
+let me have it until I have done with it, and I was determined to
+fix his flint this time. He shall never see that dress again."
+That dress was indeed the shroud in which he was entombed.
+
+After Adams' death, Barnum incorporated the California Menagerie
+with the American Museum, for a time, but afterward sold most of
+the animals. The Museum was now most prosperous, and Barnum was
+making steady progress toward paying off the debts that burdened
+him.
+
+In the fall of 1860 the Museum was visited by the Prince of Wales
+and his suite, in response to an invitation from Barnum.
+Unfortunately, Barnum himself had gone to Bridgeport that very
+morning, the invitation not having been accepted until about an
+hour before the visit. Mr. Greenwood, the manager, when he heard
+that the Prince was coming, caused the performance in the
+lecture-room to be commenced half an hour before the usual time,
+so as to clear the floors of a portion of the crowd, in order
+that he might have a better opportunity to examine the
+curiosities. When the Prince arrived, there was a great crowd
+outside the Museum, and hundreds more were soon added to the
+numbers assembled within the building. He was received by Mr.
+Greenwood, and immediately conducted to the second story, where
+the first object of interest pointed out was the "What Is It?" in
+which his Royal Highness manifested much curiosity. In compliance
+with his wish, the keeper went through the regular account of the
+animal. Here, also, the party were shown the Albino family,
+concerning whom they made inquiries. The Siamese twins, the
+sea-lions, and the seal were also pointed out, and some of the
+animals were fed in the presence of the Prince at his own
+request. He was conducted through the building, and his attention
+was called to many objects of special interest. At the close of a
+short visit, the Prince asked for Mr. Barnum, and regretted that
+he had not an opportunity of seeing him also. "We have," he said,
+"missed the most interesting feature of the establishment."
+
+A few days later Barnum called on the Prince in Boston and was
+cordially received. The Prince was much interested and amused at
+Barnum's reminiscences of the visits to Buckingham Palace with
+Tom Thumb. He told Barnum that he had been much pleased with the
+Museum, and had left his autograph there as a memento of his
+visit.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIII. BUILDING A CITY.
+
+AT HOME ONCE MORE--GROWTH OF EAST BRIDGEPORT--BARNUM'S OFFER TO
+MEN WANTING HOMES OF THEIR OWN--REMARKABLE PROGRESS OF THE
+PLACE--HOW THE STREETS WERE NAMED.
+
+It was now about five years since Barnum had had a settled home.
+The necessities of his business combined with the adversities of
+fortune had kept him knocking about from pillar to post.
+Sometimes they lived in boarding-houses, and sometimes they kept
+house in temporary quarters. Mr. and Mrs. Barnum were now alone,
+two of their daughters being married and the third being away at
+a boarding-school. Mrs. Barnum's health was much impaired, and it
+was desirable that she should have a comfortable and permanent
+home. Accordingly, in 1860, Barnum built a pleasant house at
+Bridgeport, next to that of his daughter Caroline and not far
+from the ruins of Iranistan.
+
+His unfortunate enterprise in the clock business had not
+discouraged him from further business ventures. His pet city,
+East Bridgeport, was growing rapidly. An enormous sewing-machine
+factory had been built, employing a thousand workmen. Other large
+factories were springing up, many private residences were being
+erected, and there was a great demand for houses of all kinds,
+but especially for small cottages suitable for mechanics and
+other laboring men. The farm-land which Barnum had purchased only
+a few years before was rapidly becoming a city.
+
+It was characteristic of Barnum to place himself in the forefront
+in this city-building movement, and in the double role of
+speculator and public benefactor. The enterprise which he
+undertook was calculated both to help those who were willing to
+help themselves to obtain independent homes, and at the same time
+to pay a handsome profit to Mr. Barnum. His scheme was described
+by himself as follows in the Bridgeport Standard:
+
+          "NEW HOUSES IN EAST BRIDGEPORT.
+"EVERY MAN TO OWN THE HOUSE HE LIVES IN.
+
+"There is a demand at the present moment for two hundred more
+dwelling-houses in East Bridgeport. It is evident that if the
+money expended in rent can be paid towards the purchase of a
+house and lot, the person so paying will in a few years own the
+house he lives in, instead of always remaining a tenant. In view
+of this fact, I propose to loan money at six per cent. to any
+number, not exceeding fifty, industrious, temperate and
+respectable individuals, who desire to build their own houses.
+
+"They may engage their own builders, and build according to any
+reasonable plan (which I may approve), or I will have it done for
+them at the lowest possible rate, without a farthing profit to
+myself or agent, I putting the lot at a fair price and advancing
+eighty per cent. of the entire cost; the other party to furnish
+twenty per cent. in labor, material, or money, and they may pay
+me in small sums weekly, monthly, or quarterly, any amount not
+less than three per cent. per quarter, all of which is to apply
+on the money advanced until it is paid.
+
+"It has been ascertained that by purchasing building materials
+for cash, and in large quantities, nice dwellings, painted, and
+furnished with green blinds, can be erected at a cost of $1,500
+or $1,800, for house, lot, fences, etc., all complete, and if six
+or eight friends prefer to join in erecting a neat block of
+houses with verandas in front, the average cost need not exceed
+about $1,300 per house and lot. If, however, some parties would
+prefer a single or double house that would cost $2,500 to $3,000,
+I shall be glad to meet their views.
+        "P. T. BARNUM.      "February 16, 1864."
+
+On this the editor of the paper commented as follows:
+
+"AN ADVANTAGEOUS OFFER.--We have read with great pleasure Mr.
+Barnum's advertisement, offering assistance to any number of
+persons, not exceeding fifty, in the erection of dwelling-houses.
+This plan combines all the advantages and none of the objections
+of building associations. Any individual who can furnish in cash,
+labor, or material, one-fifth only of the amount requisite for
+the erection of a dwelling-house, can receive the other
+four-fifths from Mr. Barnum, rent his house, and by merely paying
+what may be considered as only a fair rent, for a few years, find
+himself at last the owner, and all further payments cease. In the
+meantime, he can be making such inexpensive improvements in his
+property as would greatly increase its market value, and besides
+have the advantage of any rise in the value of real estate. It is
+not often that such a generous offer is made to working men. It
+is a loan on what would be generally considered inadequate
+security, at six per cent., at a time when a much better use of
+money can be made by any capitalist. It is therefore generous.
+Mr. Barnum may make money by the operation. Very well, perhaps he
+will, but if he does, it will be by making others richer, not
+poorer; by helping those who need assistance, not by hindering
+them, and we can only wish that every rich man would follow such
+a noble example, and thus, without injury to themselves, give a
+helping hand to those who need it. Success to the enterprise. We
+hope that fifty men will be found before the week ends, each of
+whom desires in such a manner to obtain a roof which he can call
+his own."
+
+A considerable number of men immediately availed themselves of
+Barnum's offer, and succeeded after a time in paying for their
+homes without much effort. There were many others, however, who
+did not fully accept his proposals. They would not sign the
+temperance pledge, and they would not give up the use of tobacco.
+The result was, that they continued month after month and year
+after year to pay rent on hired tenements. "The money they have
+expended for whiskey and tobacco," remarked Mr. Barnum,
+moralizing upon this topic, "would have given them homes of their
+own if it had been devoted to that object, and their positions,
+socially and morally, would have been far better. How many
+infatuated men there are in all parts of the country who could
+now be independent, and even owners of their own carriages, but
+for their slavery to these miserable habits!"
+
+This East Bridgeport land was originally purchased by Barnum at
+an average cost of about $200 per acre. A few years after the
+above-described enterprise, a considerable part of it was
+assessed in the tax list at from $3,000 to $4,000 per acre. It
+was presently annexed to the city, and connected with it by three
+bridges across the river. A horse-railroad was also built, of
+which Mr. Barnum was one of the original stockholders.
+
+This part of the city was laid out by General Noble and Mr.
+Barnum, and various streets were named after members of the two
+families. Hence there are Noble street, Barnum street, William
+street (General Noble's first name), Harriet street (Mrs. Noble's
+name), Hallett street (Mrs. Barnum's maiden name), and Caroline
+street, Helen street, and Pauline street, the names of Barnum's
+three daughters. A public school was also named for Mr. Barnum.
+The streets were lined with beautiful shade trees, set out by
+thousands by Barnum; and Noble, and the same gentlemen gave to
+the city its beautiful Washington Park of seven acres.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIV. GREAT YEAR AT THE MUSEUM.
+
+CAPTURING AND EXHIBITING WHITE WHALES NEWSPAPER COMMENTS--A
+TOUCHING OBITUARY--THE GREAT BEHEMOTH--A LONG "LAST
+WEEK"--COMMODORE NUTT--REAL LIVE INDIANS ON EXHIBITION.
+
+The year 1861 was notable in the history of the American Museum.
+Barnum heard that some fishermen at the mouth of the St. Lawrence
+river had captured alive a fine white whale. He was also told
+that such an animal, if packed in a box filled with sea-weed and
+salt water, could be transported over land a considerable
+distance without danger to its life or health. He accordingly
+determined to secure and place on exhibition in his Museum a
+couple of live whales. So he built in the basement of the
+building a tank of masonry, forty feet long and eighteen feet
+wide, to contain them. Then he went to the St. Lawrence river on
+a whaling expedition. His objective point was the Isle au
+Coudres, which was populated by French Canadians. There he
+engaged a party of twenty-four fishermen, and instructed them to
+capture for him, alive and unharmed, a couple of the white whales
+which at almost any time were to be seen in the water not far
+from the island.
+
+The plan decided upon was to plant in the river a "kraal,"
+composed of stakes driven down in the form of a V, leaving the
+broad end open for the whales to enter. This was done in a
+shallow place, with the point of the kraal towards shore; and if
+by chance one or more whales should enter the trap at high water,
+the fishermen were to occupy the entrance with their boats, and
+keep up a tremendous splashing and noise till the tide receded,
+when the frightened whales would find themselves nearly "high and
+dry," or with too little water to enable them to swim, and their
+capture would be next thing in order. This was to be effected by
+securing a slip-noose of stout rope over their tails, and towing
+them to the sea-weed lined boxes in which they were to be
+transported to New York.
+
+Many times fine whales were seen gliding close by the entrance to
+the trap, but they did not enter it, and the patience of Barnum
+and his fishermen was sorely tried. One day one whale did enter
+the kraal, and the fishermen proposed to capture it, but Barnum
+was determined to have two, and while they waited for the second
+one to enter the first one went out again. After several days of
+waiting, Barnum was aroused early one morning by the excited and
+delighted shouts of his men. Hastily dressing, he found that two
+whales were in the trap and were sure of being captured. Leaving
+the rest of the task to his assistants, he hurried back to New
+York. At every station on the route he gave instructions to the
+telegraph operators to take off all whaling messages that passed
+over the wires to New York, and to inform their fellow-townsmen
+at what hour the whales would pass through each place.
+
+The result of these arrangements may be imagined; at every
+station crowds of people came to the cars to see the whales which
+were travelling by land to Barnum's Museum, and those who did not
+see the monsters with their own eyes, at least saw some one who
+had seen them, and thus was secured a tremendous advertisement,
+seven hundred miles long, for the American Museum.
+
+Arrived in New York, dispatches continued to come from the
+whaling expedition every few hours. These were bulletined in
+front of the Museum and copies sent to the papers. The excitement
+was intense, and, when at last, these marine monsters arrived and
+were swimming in the tank that had been prepared for them,
+anxious thousands literally rushed to see the strangest
+curiosities ever exhibited in New York.
+
+Barnum's first whaling expedition was thus a great success.
+Unfortunately he did not know how to feed or take care of the
+animals. A supply of salt water could not be obtained, so they
+were put into fresh water artificially salted, and this did not
+agree with them. The basement of the Museum building was also
+poorly ventilated and the air was unwholesome. As the result of
+these circumstances the whales died within a week, although not
+until they had been seen by thousands of people. Barnum
+immediately resolved to try again. In order to secure a better
+home for his pets, he laid an iron pipe under the streets of the
+city, from his Museum clear out into New York bay. Through this,
+by means of a steam-engine, he was able to secure a constant
+supply of genuine sea-water. In order that the whales should have
+good air to breathe, he constructed for them another tank on the
+second floor of the Museum building. This tank had a floor of
+slate, and the sides were made of French plate-glass, in huge
+pieces six feet long, five feet wide, and one inch thick. These
+plates were imported by Barnum expressly for the purpose. The
+tank was twenty-four feet square. Two more white whales were soon
+caught in the same manner as before, and were conveyed in a ship
+to Quebec and thence by rail to New York.
+
+Barnum was always proud of this enterprise, and it yielded him
+handsome profits. The second pair of whales, however, soon died.
+Barnum remarked that their sudden and immense popularity was too
+much for them. But a third pair was quickly secured to take their
+place. Envious and hostile critics declared that they were not
+whales at all, but only porpoises, but this did no harm. Indeed,
+Barnum might well have paid them to start these malicious
+reports, for much good advertising was thereby secured. The
+illustrious Agassiz was appealed to. He came to see the animals,
+gave Barnum a certificate that they were genuine white whales,
+and this document was published far and wide.
+
+The manner in which the showman advertised his curiosities may be
+seen from the following, taken from one of the daily papers of
+the time:
+
+BARNUM'S AMERICAN MUSEUM. ----After months of unwearied labor,
+and spending NEARLY TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS NEARLY TEN THOUSAND
+DOLLARS NEARLY TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS
+
+in capturing and transporting them from that part of the Gulf of
+St. Lawrence nearest Labrador, the Manager is enabled to offer
+his visitors
+
+TWO LIVING WHALES, TWO LIVING WHALES, TWO LIVING WHALES, TWO
+LIVING WHALES, TWO LIVING WHALES, TWO LIVING WHALES,
+
+a male and a female. Everybody has heard of WHALES
+
+IN NURSERY TALES and "SAILOR'S YARNS," IN NURSERY TALES and
+"SAILOR'S YARNS,"
+
+everybody has read of WHALES in story, song, and history, and
+everybody
+
+WANTS TO SEE A WHALE, WANTS TO SEE A WHALE, WANTS TO SEE A WHALE,
+WANTS TO SEE A WHALE,
+
+and now they have the opportunity. Barnum has
+
+CAPTURED TWO OF THE LEVIATHANS, CAPTURED TWO OF THE LEVIATHANS,
+CAPTURED TWO OF THE LEVIATHANS,
+
+has built a small ocean in his Museum, filled it from the briny
+deep, and there
+
+THE TWO LIVING WHALES, THE TWO LIVING WHALES, THE TWO LIVING
+WHALES, THE TWO LIVING WHALES,
+
+measuring respectively fifteen and twenty feet in length, may be
+seen at all hours sporting in their native element. Who will miss
+the opportunity of seeing them? Another may not offer in a
+lifetime. Embrace this ere it be too late. See Mr. Barnum's card
+below.
+
+LAST TWO DAYS OF WILLIAM TILLMAN AND WILLIAM STEDDING,
+
+The Colored Steward and German Sailor of the
+
+SCHOONER S. J. WARING,
+
+Who slew three of the piratical prize crew, and rescued
+themselves and the vessel from their power.
+
+WHAT IS IT? OR, MAN MONKEY.
+
+MADAGASCAR ALBINOS, PURE WHITE NEGROES, OR MOORS. SEA LION,
+MAMMOTH BEAR SAMSON, with a variety of other living Bears;
+MONSTER SNAKES, AQUARIA, HAPPY FAMILY, LIVING SEAL, WAX FIGURES,
+&c.
+
+In the Lecture-Room, a great Dramatic Novelty is offered,
+
+EMBRACING FARCE, VAUDEVILLE and BURLETTA, with a brilliant and
+talented company, including LITTLE LOLA, THE INFANT WONDER,
+
+Mr. and Mrs. C. B. REYNOLDS;
+
+Miss DORA DAWRON, DOUBLE-VOICED SINGER, LA PETITE ADDIE LE BRUN,
+
+The favorite Juvenile Danseuse, always popular.
+
+MARIE; THE CHILD OF SORROW,
+
+With a laughable farce, every day at 3 and 7 3/4 o'clock.
+Admission to all, 25 cents; Children under 10, 15 cents.
+-------------------------------------------------------------A
+CARD FROM P. T. BARNUM.--LIVING WHALES on exhibition.--Having
+learned from fishermen and eminent naturalists, including the
+written statement of the celebrated Prof. Agassiz, that the White
+Whale could be found in that portion of the Gulf of St. Lawrence
+nearest to Labrador, I made a journey there in June last,
+accompanied by my agent. I remained there a fortnight, and made
+every arrangement for capturing and keeping alive two of these
+monsters. This arrangement included the service of thirty-five
+men, beside my special agent. I then returned and had erected in
+the Museum a reservoir fifty feet in length and twenty-five feet
+in width, in which was placed sea-water, and arrangements made
+for a continual fresh supply. I also made arrangements with
+steamers and railroads to convey these leviathans to New York at
+the fastest possible speed, without regard to the expense.
+
+I am highly gratified in being able to assure the public that
+they have arrived safe and well, a MALE and FEMALE, from 15 to 20
+feet long, and are now swimming in the miniature ocean in my
+Museum, to the delight of visitors. As it is very doubtful
+whether these wonderful creatures can be kept alive more than a
+few days, the public will see the importance of seizing the first
+moment to see them.
+                        P. T. BARNUM.
+
+AMERICAN MUSEUM, Thursday, August 8, 1861.
+
+"A real live whale," said an editorial writer in the New York
+Tribune of that date, "is as great a curiosity as a live lord or
+prince, being much more difficult to catch, and far more
+wonderful in its appearance and habits. After all people are
+people, and have much the same ways of feeling and doing. But
+when we get among the whales, we catch glimpses of a new and neat
+thing in nose, recall the narrative of Jonah without throwing a
+shadow of a doubt upon its authenticity, and appreciate keenly
+the difficulties with which mermaid society must have to contend.
+
+"We owe the presence of two whales in our midst to the enterprise
+of Mr. P. T. Barnum. He has had them in tow for a long while, but
+has kept his secret well, and it was not until his own special
+whaler telegraphed from Troy that he had come so far into the
+bowels of the earth with his submarine charge, and all well, that
+he felt warranted in whispering whale to the public. The public
+was delighted, but not surprised, because it feels that the
+genius that is equal to a What Is It is also equal to the biggest
+thing, and would experience no unusual thrill of wonder if a real
+iceberg, or a section of the identical North Pole, should be
+announced on the bills of the Museum.
+
+"But flocks of the public sought the Museum yesterday, and were
+not disappointed. They saw not, as Polonius, something 'very like
+a whale,' but the original animal in its original element. The
+bears, and the anacondas, the hatchet, and the seal, sank into
+merited insignificance, although they will have their day again
+if the whales should expire. The transfer of the fish was neatly
+effected. They travelled the whole distance in first-class
+hermetical boxes, filled with water and thickly lined with
+seaweed, and were landed, if the expression may be used, in the
+new and excellent tank provided for them in the basement of the
+Museum. This tank is fifty feet deep and twenty-five in width,
+has seven feet of sea-water in it, and seems to suit the whales
+eminently. Mr. Barnum has fears that the pets will have but a
+brief, if brilliant, career, in their new quarters, but we prefer
+to predict for them a long and happy one.
+
+"These are white whales, and were taken near the Labrador coast
+by a crew of thirty-five men. The largest has attained the
+extreme size reached by this species, and is about 22 feet long;
+the other is 18 feet long. Their form and motion are graceful,
+and their silver backs and bellies show brightly through the
+water. A long-continued intimacy has endeared them to each other,
+and they go about quite like a pair of whispering lovers, blowing
+off their mutual admiration in a very emphatic manner. Just at
+present they are principally engaged in throwing their eyes
+around the premises, and pay small attention to visitors, upon
+whom, indeed, the narrative of Jonah has a strong hold. And yet
+neither of these whales could make a single mouthful of a man of
+ordinary size. Even if one of them should succeed in swallowing a
+man, he could just stand up with the whale, and make it, at
+least, as uncomfortable as himself.
+
+"Here is a real 'sensation.' We do not believe the enterprise of
+Mr. Barnum will stop at white whales. It will embrace sperm
+whales and mermaids, and all strange things that swim or fly or
+crawl, until the Museum will become one vast microcosm of the
+animal creation. A quarter seems positively contemptible weighed
+against such a treat."
+
+And this was the public tribute, from the same pen, to the first
+of the cetaceans that died through too much publicity:
+
+"The community was shocked to hear of the death of one of
+Barnum's whales yesterday morning. Death apparently loves a
+shining mark. It seems but yesterday--in fact it was the day
+before--we gazed upon the youthful form, instinct with life, and
+looking forward to a useful and pleasant career. The whale shared
+not the forebodings of its friends. Mr. Barnum was possessed with
+a strange presentiment of calamity, and summoned the public to
+either a house of mourning or a house of joy, he knew not which,
+but at all events to be quick. At daybreak, we believe, the great
+natural curiosity passed away.
+
+"The blow is a severe one. To Mr. Barnum it must be a shocking
+reminder of the emptiness of all human plans. Enterprise, liberal
+expenditure, courage--what are they all before the fell
+destroyer? Even whales have their time to sink and rise no more.
+To the dear companion of all the joys and sorrows of the troubled
+life of the deceased the bereavement must be sore indeed.
+Delicacy forbids that we should lay bare such sorrows. No
+twenty-five cent ticket should admit to them, including the
+lecture-room. Such as witnessed the tender endearments between
+these white whales, and saw how they had hearts that beat as one,
+and how they were not happy when they were not pretty near each
+other in the tank, may, perhaps, realize the anguish of their
+separation. We are not surprised to learn, indeed, that the
+affliction has borne so heavily upon the survivor that there may
+be tidings at any moment of the flight of its spirit also. May
+both whales meet again in the open seas of immortality! The loss
+of the public is great, although not irreparable. The world moves
+on, and many natural curiosities remain to fill up the gaps
+caused by death. Mr. Barnum's spirit, although saddened, is not
+broken. He sees the objects of his care and best management
+snatched from him, and yet he announces that he will immediately
+send on for two more whales of the same sort. We shall soon
+forget the lost whales in contemplation of the new. Such is life,
+it is well known.
+
+"The decease may be attributed in a great measure to bear. It is
+true that there might have been something injurious to the health
+of the fish in a long overland journey. 'A fish out of water' is
+a case that tries the utmost skill of the faculty. If a man were
+confined in the most comfortable of water-tight boxes and
+carried, under the care of a special agent, hundreds of miles
+beneath the water, we should not be startled to hear that his
+constitution was much shattered at the end of the journey. And
+yet we are more encouraged to think that the whale owed his death
+to other causes than the overland transportation, because the sea
+lion does so well, and the fishes in the aquaria appear to be so
+hearty and contented. To bear, then, we must attribute our loss.
+This animal abounded in the basement where the tank is, and
+whether through jealousy of the fame of the new-comers, or
+through some settled antipathy between flesh and fish, or simply
+through his natural beastliness, he communicated effluvia to the
+atmosphere that were perfectly unendurable by whale, which
+promptly expired from want of good breath.
+
+"This agent of destruction will be removed from the premises
+before the next whales arrive, and suitable measures will be
+taken to guard against such a mournful catastrophe. There is a
+whale in Boston whose health is so good that it never requires
+medical attendance.
+
+"The deceased was about sixty years of age. It bore an excellent
+character. Its patience and sweet disposition under the most
+trying circumstances will long be remembered. The remains,
+weighing not less than twenty-six hundred pounds, will be
+suitably disposed off. While the public mourns it may also
+console itself with the reflection that there are plenty more
+where it came from, and that the energy of Barnum is not to be
+abated by any of the common disasters of life, and may hopefully
+anticipate a speedy announcement of an entirely new whale. Vale!
+Vale!"
+
+The tank in the basement of the Museum was now devoted to a yet
+more interesting exhibition. On August 12, 1861, Barnum placed in
+it the first live hippopotamus that had ever been seen in
+America. The brute was advertised most extensively and
+ingeniously as "the great behemoth of the Scriptures," and
+thousands of scientific men, biblical students, clergymen and
+others, besides the great host of the common people, flocked to
+see it. There was fully as much excitement in New York over this
+wonder in the animal creation as there was in London when the
+first hippopotamus was placed in the Regent's Park "Zoo."
+
+Barnum began by advertising that the animal was on exhibition for
+a short time only. Then he announced the "last week" of the novel
+show. Then, "by special request," another week was added. And
+thus the "last week of the hippopotamus" was prolonged through
+many months. The following is a fair sample of the advertisements
+with which the daily papers literally teemed:
+
+BARNUM'S MUSEUM ----SECOND WEEK OF THAT WONDERFUL LIVING
+HIPPOPOTAMUS,
+
+FROM THE RIVER NILE IN EGYPT THE GREAT BEHEMOTH OF THE SCRIPTURES
+AND THE MARVEL OF THE ANIMAL KINGDOM.
+
+The history of this animal is full of interest, and to every
+class, especially the educated and intelligent, but above all to
+the biblical student, who has read with interest the glowing
+description of
+
+THE GREAT BEHEMOTH
+
+in the Book of Job. He is strictly an
+
+AMPHIBIOUS ANIMAL,
+
+living in the water and out of it; under the water, or on the top
+of it, floats on its surface with perfect ease, or beneath the
+surface, midway between the top and the bottom. In their natural
+state these animals are wild and ferocious; though on the land,
+they are not very formidable, but when pursued they fly to the
+rivers,
+
+DESCEND TO THE BOTTOM AND WALK ACROSS,
+
+frequently appearing on the opposite side without the least
+indication of their course on the surface of the stream. If
+exasperated by assaults, in the water they are the most
+
+FRIGHTFUL ANTAGONISTS,
+
+their gigantic proportions and herculean strength, giving them
+power over every opposing force, frequently destroying whole
+boat-loads of men and their boats, crushing with their huge jaws
+everything that comes in their way. In the Museum the specimen
+here exhibited has an
+
+ARTIFICIAL OCEAN OR RIVER,
+
+where he is to be seen in all his natural peculiarities, floating
+on, and swiming beneath the surface, walking on the bottom
+several feet beneath, exhibiting, in short, all the peculiarities
+of his nature; and to perfect the scene, native
+
+ARABIAN KEEPER, SALAAMA,
+
+who is himself a curiosity as a specimen of that historic tribe
+of men, who exhibits all the stolidity and Arabian dignity of
+that Oriental race; the only man who can control or exhibit his
+hippopotamiship, is in constant attendance. They are both to be
+seen at all hours, DAY and EVENING.
+
+This is the
+
+FIRST AND ONLY REAL HIPPOPOTAMUS
+
+ever seen in America. He is engaged at a cost of many thousand of
+dollars, and will remain
+
+A SHORT TIME ONLY. A SHORT TIME ONLY.
+
+Also just obtained at great expense, and now to be seen swimming
+in the large tank in the Aquarial Hall,
+
+A LIVING SHARK,
+
+beside a great variety of other living Fish, Turtles, &c., &c.
+
+WHAT IS IT? OR, MAN MONKEY. SEA LION, MAMMOTH BEAR SAMSON,
+MONSTER SNAKES, AQUARIA, HAPPY FAMILY, LIVING SEAL, &c.
+
+The Lecture-Room Entertainments embrace PETITE DRAMA, VAUDEVILLE,
+BURLETTA and FARCE. By a company of rare musical and dramatic
+talent. Miss DAWRON, DOUBLE-VOICED VOCALIST, Mlle. MATILDA E.
+TOEDT,
+
+The Talented Young Violinist, &c.
+
+Admission to all, 25 cents; Children under 10, 15 cents.
+
+Nor did the monster fail to receive much other notice in the
+press. Said one writer: "Nothing discomfitted by the sudden death
+that overtook the gentle and loving whales, Mr. Barnum has again
+invested untold heaps of money in a tremendous water-monster. The
+great tank has again a tenant, and the great public have huge
+amphibious matter for their wonderment. The new curiosity comes
+to us staggering under the unwieldy name of Hippo-potamus. He is
+a comely gentleman, fair and beauteous to look upon; and the
+strange loveliness of his countenance cannot fail to captivate
+the crowd. His youth, too, gives him a special claim to the
+consideration of the ladies, for he is a little darling of only
+three years--a very baby of a hippopotamus in fact, who, only a
+few months ago, daily sucked his few gallons of lacteal
+nourishment from the fond bosom of mamma Hippo, at the bottom of
+some murmuring Egyptian river. The young gentleman is about as
+heavy as an ox, and gives you the idea that he is the result of
+the amalgamation of a horse, a cow, two pigs, a seal, a dozen
+India-rubber blankets, and an old-fashioned horse-hide covered
+trunk. Big as he is, unwieldy as he is, strange, uncouth, and
+monstrous as he is, he appears after all to be most mild and
+even-tempered. In truth, he is no more vicious than a
+good-natured muley cow; and if by chance he should hurt anybody,
+he would have to achieve it much in the same manner that such a
+cow would, by running against him, or rolling over upon him. So
+that the red-breeched individual, who so valiantly gets over the
+railing and stands by the side of young Hippo, doesn't, after
+all, do a deed of such superhuman daring, for all he does it with
+such an air of reckless sacrifice of self for the public good.
+The hippopotamus is certainly one of the most interesting and
+attractive of all the strange creatures ever yet caught by Mr.
+Barnum, and offered for the delectation of the paying public. He
+is well worth a visit, and an hour's inspection. He receives
+daily, from 9 A.M. to some time after dark."
+
+Having now a good supply of salt water Barnum greatly enlarged
+his aquarium, which was the first show of the kind ever seen in
+America. He exhibited in it living sharks, porpoises, sea-horses
+and many rare fishes. For several seasons he kept a boat cruising
+the ocean in search of marine novelties. In this way he secured
+many of the beautiful angel fishes and others that never had been
+seen in New York before. He also purchased the Aquarial Gardens
+in Boston, and removed the entire collection to his Museum.
+
+The story of another of Barnum's greatest hits must be told in
+his own words: "In December, 1861," he related, "I was visited at
+the Museum by a most remarkable dwarf, who was a sharp,
+intelligent little fellow, with a deal of drollery and wit. He
+had a splendid head, was perfectly formed, and was very
+attractive, and, in short, for a 'showman,' he was a perfect
+treasure. His name, he told me, was George Washington Morrison
+Nutt, and his father was Major Rodnia Nutt, a substantial farmer,
+of Manchester, New Hampshire. I was not long in dispatching an
+efficient agent to Manchester, and in overcoming the competition
+with other showmen who were equally eager to secure this
+extraordinary pigmy. The terms upon which I engaged him for three
+years were so large that he was christened the $30,000 Nutt; I,
+in the meantime, conferring upon him the title of Commodore. As
+soon as I engaged him, placards, posters and the columns of the
+newspapers proclaimed the presence of 'Commodore Nutt' at the
+Museum. I also procured for the Commodore a pair of Shetland
+ponies, miniature coachman and footman, in livery, gold-mounted
+harness, and an elegant little carriage, which, when closed,
+represented a gigantic English walnut. The little Commodore
+attracted great attention, and grew rapidly in public favor.
+General Tom Thumb was then travelling in the South and West. For
+some years he had not been exhibited in New York, and during
+these years he had increased considerably in rotundity and had
+changed much in his general appearance. It was a singular fact,
+however, that Commodore Nutt was almost a fac-simile of General
+Tom Thumb, as he looked half-a-dozen years before. Consequently,
+very many of my patrons, not making allowance for the time which
+had elapsed since they had last seen the General, declared that
+there was no such person as 'Commodore Nutt;' but that I was
+exhibiting my old friend Tom Thumb under a new name.
+
+"Commodore Nutt enjoyed the joke very much. He would sometimes
+half admit the deception, simply to add to the bewilderment of
+the doubting portion of my visitors.
+
+"It was evident that here was an opportunity to turn all doubts
+into hard cash, by simply bringing the two dwarf Dromios
+together, and showing them on the same platform. I therefore
+induced Tom Thumb to bring his Western engagements to a close,
+and to appear for four weeks, beginning with August 11, 1862, in
+my Museum. Announcements headed 'The Two Dromios,' and 'Two
+Smallest Men, and Greatest Curiosities Living,' as I expected,
+drew large crowds to see them, and many came especially to solve
+their doubts with regard to the genuineness of the 'Nutt.' But
+here I was considerably nonplussed, for, astonishing as it may
+seem, the doubts of many of the visitors were confirmed! The
+sharp people who were determined 'not to be humbugged, anyhow,'
+still declared that Commodore Nutt was General Tom Thumb, and
+that the little fellow whom I was trying to pass off as Tom
+Thumb, was no more like the General than he was like the man in
+the moon. It is very amusing to see how people will sometimes
+deceive themselves by being too incredulous.
+
+"In 1862 I sent the Commodore to Washington, and, joining him
+there, I received an invitation from President Lincoln to call at
+the White House with my little friend. Arriving at the appointed
+hour, I was informed that the President was in a special Cabinet
+meeting, but that he had left word if I called to be shown in to
+him with the Commodore. These were dark days in the rebellion,
+and I felt that my visit, if not ill-timed, must at all events be
+brief. When we were admitted, Mr. Lincoln received us cordially,
+and introduced us to the members of the Cabinet. When Mr. Chase
+was introduced as the Secretary of the Treasury, the little
+Commodore remarked:
+
+" 'I suppose you are the gentleman who is spending so much of
+Uncle Sam's money?'
+
+" 'No, indeed,' said the Secretary of War, Mr. Stanton, very
+promptly; 'I am spending the money.'
+
+" 'Well,' said Commodore Nutt, 'it is in a good cause, anyhow,
+and I guess it will come out all right.'
+
+"His apt remark created much amusement. Mr. Lincoln then bent
+down his long, lank body, and taking Nutt by the hand, he said:
+
+" 'Commodore, permit me to give you a parting word of advice.
+When you are in command of your fleet, if you find yourself in
+danger of being taken prisoner, I advise you to wade ashore.'
+
+The Commodore found the laugh was against him, but placing
+himself at the side of the President, and gradually raising his
+eyes up the whole length of Mr. Lincoln's very long legs, he
+replied:
+
+" 'I guess, Mr. President, you could do that better than I
+could.' "
+
+In no place did extremes ever meet in a more practical sense than
+in the American Museum. Commodore Nutt was the shortest of men;
+and at the same time the Museum contained the tallest of women.
+Her name was Anna Swan, and she came from Nova Scotia. Barnum
+first heard of her through a Quaker, who was visiting the Museum.
+This visitor came to Barnum's office, and told him of a wonderful
+girl, only seventeen years old, who lived near him at Pictou.
+Barnum soon sent an agent up there, who brought the young lady
+back to New York. She was an intelligent girl, and, despite her
+enormous stature, was decidedly good-looking. For a long time she
+was a leading attraction at Barnum's Museum, and afterwards went
+to England and attracted great attention there.
+
+For many years Barnum had been in the habit of engaging parties
+of American Indians from the far West to exhibit at the Museum.
+He had also sent several parties of them to Europe, where they
+were regarded as extraordinary curiosities.
+
+In 1864 ten or twelve chiefs, of as many different tribes,
+visited the President of the United States, at Washington. By a
+pretty liberal outlay of money, Barnum succeeded in inducing the
+interpreter to bring them to New York, and to pass some days at
+the Museum. Of course, getting these Indians to dance, or to give
+any illustration of their games or pastimes, was out of the
+question. They were real chiefs of powerful tribes, and would no
+more have consented to give an exhibition of themselves than the
+chief magistrate of our own nation would have done. Their
+interpreter could not therefore promise that they would remain at
+the Museum for any definite time; "for," said he, "you can only
+keep them just so long as they suppose all your patrons come to
+pay them visits of honor. If they suspected that your Museum was
+a place where people paid for entering," he continued, "you could
+not keep them a moment after the discovery."
+
+On their arrival at the Museum, therefore, Barnum took them upon
+the stage and personally introduced them to the public. The
+Indians liked this attention from him, as they had been informed
+that he was the proprietor of the great establishment in which
+they were invited and honored guests. His patrons were of course
+pleased to see these old chiefs, as they knew they were the "REAL
+thing," and several of them were known to the public, either as
+being friendly or cruel to the whites. After one or two
+appearances on the stage, Barnum took them in carriages and
+visited the Mayor of New York in the Governor's room at the City
+Hall. Here the Mayor made them a speech of welcome, which, being
+interpreted to the savages, was responded to by a speech from one
+of the chiefs, in which he thanked the "Great Father" of the city
+for his pleasant words, and for his kindness in pointing out the
+portraits of his predecessors hanging on the walls of the
+Governor's room.
+
+On another occasion Barnum took them by special invitation to
+visit one of the large public schools up town. The teachers were
+pleased to see them, and arranged an exhibition of special
+exercises by the scholars, which they thought would be most
+likely to gratify their barbaric visitors. At the close of these
+exercises, one old chief arose, and simply said: "This is all new
+to us. We are mere unlearned sons of the forest, and cannot
+understand what we have seen and heard."
+
+On other occasions he took them to ride in Central Park, and
+through different portions of the city. At every street-corner
+which they passed they would express their astonishment to each
+other, at seeing the long rows of houses which extended both ways
+on either side of each cross-street. Of course, after each of
+these outside visits Barnum would return with them to the Museum,
+and secure two or three appearances upon the stage to receive the
+people who had there congregated "to do them honor."
+
+As they regarded him as their host, they did not hesitate to
+trespass upon his hospitality. Whenever their eyes rested upon a
+glittering shell among his specimens of conchology, especially if
+it had several brilliant colors, one would take off his coat,
+another his shirt, and insist that he should exchange the shell
+for the garment. When he declined the exchange, but on the
+contrary presented the coveted article, he soon found he had
+established a dangerous precedent. Immediately they all commenced
+to beg for everything in the vast collection which they happened
+to take a liking to. This cost Barnum many valuable specimens,
+and often "put him to his trumps" for an excuse to avoid giving
+them things which he could not part with.
+
+The chief of one of the tribes one day discovered an ancient
+shirt of chain-mail which hung in one of the cases of antique
+armor. He was delighted with it, and declared he must have it.
+Barnum tried all sorts of excuses to prevent his getting it, for
+it had cost a hundred dollars, and was a great curiosity. But the
+old man's eyes glistened, and he would not take "no" for an
+answer. "The Utes have killed my little child," he said through
+the interpreter; and now he must have this steel shirt to protect
+himself; and when he returned to the Rocky Mountains he would
+have his revenge. Barnum remained inexorable until the chief
+finally brought a new buckskin Indian suit, which he insisted
+upon exchanging. Barnum then felt compelled to accept his
+proposal; and never did anyone see a man more delighted than the
+Indian seemed to be when he took the mailed shirt into his hands.
+He fairly jumped up and down with joy. He ran to his
+lodging-room, and soon appeared again with the coveted armor upon
+his body, and marched down one of the main halls of the Museum,
+with folded arms, and head erect, occasionally patting his breast
+with his right hand, as much as to say, "Now, Mr. Ute, look
+sharp, for I will soon be on the war-path!"
+
+Among these Indians were War Bonnet, Lean Bear, and
+Hand-in-the-water, chiefs of the Cheyennes; Yellow Buffalo, of
+the Kiowas; Yellow Bear, of the same tribe; Jacob, of the Caddos;
+and White Bull, of the Apaches. The little wiry chief known as
+Yellow Bear had killed many whites as they had travelled through
+the "far West." He was a sly, treacherous, bloodthirsty savage,
+who would think no more of scalping a family of women and
+children than a butcher would of wringing the neck of a chicken.
+But now he was on a mission to the "Great Father" at Washington,
+seeking for presents and favors for his tribe, and he pretended
+to be exceedingly meek and humble, and continually urged the
+interpreter to announce him as a "great friend to the white man."
+He would fawn about Barnum, and although not speaking or
+understanding a word of our language, would try to convince him
+that he loved him dearly.
+
+In exhibiting these Indian warriors on the stage, Barnum
+explained to the large audiences the names and characteristics of
+each. When he came to Yellow Bear he would pat him familiarly
+upon the shoulder, which always caused him to look up with a
+pleasant smile, while he softly stroked Barnum's arm with his
+right hand in the most loving manner. Knowing that he could not
+understand a word he said, Barnum pretended to be complimenting
+him to the audience, while he was really saying something like
+the following:
+
+"This little Indian, ladies and gentlemen, is Yellow Bear, chief
+of the Kiowas. He has killed, no doubt, scores of white persons,
+and he is probably the meanest black-hearted rascal that lives in
+the far West." Here Barnum patted him on the head, and he,
+supposing he was sounding his praises, would smile, fawn upon
+him, and stroke his arm, while he continued: "If the bloodthirsty
+little villain understood what I was saying, he would kill me in
+a moment; but as he thinks I am complimenting him, I can safely
+state the truth to you, that he is a lying, thieving,
+treacherous, murderous monster. He has tortured to death poor,
+unprotected women, murdered their husbands, brained their
+helpless little ones; and he would gladly do the same to you or
+to me, if he thought he could escape punishment. This is but a
+faint description of the character of Yellow Bear." Here Barnum
+gave him another patronizing pat on the head, and he, with a
+pleasant smile, bowed to the audience, as much as to say that the
+words were quite true, and that he thanked Barnum very much for
+the high encomiums he had so generously heaped upon him.
+
+After the Indians had been at the Museum about week they
+discovered the real character of the place. They found they were
+simply on exhibition, and that people paid a fee for the
+privilege of coming in and gazing at them. Forthwith there was an
+outcry of discontent and anger. Nothing would induce them again
+to appear upon the stage. Their dignity had been irretrievably
+offended, and Barnum was actually fearful lest they should wreak
+vengeance upon him with physical violence. It was with a feeling
+of great relief that he witnessed their departure for Washington
+the next day.
+
+In the fall of this year Barnum produced at his Museum a
+dramatization of Dickens's "Great Expectations." On the opening
+night of the play, before the curtain rose, the great showman
+himself went upon the stage and made this poetical address of
+welcome to the audience:
+
+LADIES AND GENTLEMEN:
+
+ "That Prince of Humbugs, Barnum," so it appears
+ Some folks have designated me for several years.
+ Well, I don't murmur; indeed, when they embellish it,
+ To tell the truth, my friends, I rather relish it,
+ Since your true humbug's be, who as a host,
+ For the least money entertains you most.
+ In this sense I'm a "humbug," I succumb!
+ Who as a "General" thing brought out Tom Thumb?
+ Who introduced (you can't say there I sinned)
+ The Swedish Nightingale, sweet Jenny Lind?
+ Who brought you Living Whales from Labrador?
+ The Hippopotamus from Nilus's shore,
+ The Bearded Lady with her (h)airs and graces,
+ The Aztec Children with their normal faces,
+ The Twins of Siam--rarest of dualities--
+ Two ever separate, ne'er apart realities?
+ The Family of Albinos? the Giraffe?
+ The famous Baby Show that made you laugh?
+ The Happy Family--cats, rats, doves, hawks, harmonious?
+ Their voices blend in tones euphonious.
+ The great Sea Lion from Pacific's coast,
+ The "Monarch of the Ocean," no empty boast;
+ Old Adam's Bears, cutest of brute performers,
+ In modern "peace meetings" models for reformers.
+ That living miracle, the Lightning Calculator,
+ Those figures confound Hermann the "Prestidigitator."
+ The Grand Aquaria, an official story
+ Of life beneath the waves ill all its glory;
+ The curious "What is It?" which you, though spunky,
+ Won't call a man and cannot call a monkey.
+ These things and many more time forbids to state,
+ I first introduced, if I did not originate;
+ "The World's Seven Wonders," pooh! let them invite you,
+ Here "seven" saloons all wonder-full delight you.
+ To call this "humbug" admits of no defence,
+ For all is shown for five and twenty cents.
+ And now, good friends, to use less rhyme than reason,
+ To-day re-opens our dramatic season;
+ Therefore I welcome you! And though we're certain
+ To raise "Great Expectations" with the curtain,
+ And "play the Dickens" afternoon and nightly,
+ I bid you welcome none the less politely,
+ To these my "quarters," merry and reliable,
+ That yours are always welcome 'tis undeniable!
+ And Patrick Henry like I say, I boast of it,
+ If that be "humbug," gentlemen, "make the most of it."
+
+The foregoing address may be correctly said to have as much truth
+as poetry. It is a graceful summary of the curiosities which
+Barnum had brought before the world up to his sixtieth year. It
+does not include the Sacred White Elephant of Siam, the mammoth
+Jumbo and other wonders of nature which he was yet to reveal to
+astonished and delighted millions. Nor does it indicate that
+grand genius of aggregation by which in later years he surpassed
+all his previous performances--masterly as they were. Not till
+the veteran had reached the age of seventy--the allotted span of
+life--did he gather and create "The Greatest Show on Earth."
+
+In connection with the dramatization of Dickens' novel, it seems
+surprising that the Great Showman had little intercourse with the
+Great Novelist. He was on intimate terms with Thackeray and gave
+him useful hints for his lecturing tour in the United States, by
+which the humorist duly profited. But Dickens, who reached the
+popular heart as Barnum did their senses, seems to have held
+aloof from one whose knowledge of men rivalled his own.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXV. GENERAL AND MRS. TOM THUMB.
+
+MISS LAVINIA WARREN--THE RIVALS--MISS WARREN'S ENGAGEMENT TO TOM
+THUMB--THE WEDDING--GRAND RECEPTION--LETTER FROM A WOULD-BE
+GUEST, AND DR. TAYLOR'S REPLY.
+
+In 1862 Mr. Barnum heard of an extraordinary dwarf girl named
+Lavinia Warren, who was living at Middleboro, Massachusetts, and
+sent an invitation to her and her parents to visit him at
+Bridgeport: they came, and Barnum found her to be a very
+intelligent and refined young lady. He immediately made a
+contract with her for several years, she agreeing to visit the
+Old World.
+
+He purchased a splendid wardrobe for her, including many elegant
+dresses, costly jewels and everything else that could add to her
+naturally charming person. She was placed on exhibition at the
+Museum, and from the first was a great success. Commodore Nutt
+was exhibited with her, and although he was several years her
+junior, he at once took a violent fancy to her. One day Mr.
+Barnum gave Miss Warren a diamond and emerald ring, and as it did
+not exactly fit her finger, he offered to get her another one
+just like it, and told her to present this one to Commodore Nutt
+in her own name. She did so, and the Commodore, who possessed a
+full proportion of masculine vanity, construed the gift to be a
+love token, and poor Lavinia was much distressed, for she
+considered herself quite a woman, and the Commodore only "a nice
+boy." Still she did not like to offend him, and continued to
+treat him kindly, while not actually encouraging his attentions.
+
+At the time Tom Thumb was not on exhibition at the Museum; he was
+taking a vacation at his home in Bridgeport. One day he came to
+New York quite unexpectedly, and naturally called on Mr. Barnum
+at the Museum. Lavinia was holding one of her levees when he came
+in, and he was presented to her.
+
+After a short interview with her he went directly to Mr. Barnum's
+private office and asked to see him alone. The door was closed
+and the General sat down. His first question gave Mr. Barnum a
+slight inkling of the object of the interview. The General wanted
+to know all about the family of Lavinia Warren. Mr. Barnum gave
+him all information, and the General said, earnestly, "That is
+the most charming little lady I ever saw, and I believe she was
+created to be my wife. Now, Mr. Barnum, you've always been a
+friend of mine, and I want you to say a good word for me to her.
+I've got plenty of money and I want to marry and settle down, and
+I really feel as though I must marry that young lady."
+
+Mr. Barnum laughed, and recalling his ancient joke, said:
+"Lavinia is already engaged, General."
+
+"To whom? Commodore Nutt?" asked Tom Thumb, jealously.
+
+"No, to me."
+
+"Oh!" laughed the General, much relieved. "Never mind; you may
+exhibit her for a while, and then give up the engagement; but I
+do hope you will favor my suit with her."
+
+"Well, General," replied Barnum, "I will not oppose your suit,
+but you must do your own courting. I will tell you, however, that
+Commodore Nutt will be jealous of you, and more than that, Miss
+Warren is nobody's fool, and you will have to proceed very
+cautiously if you succeed in winning her."
+
+The General promised to be very discreet. A change now came over
+him. He had been very fond of his country home at Bridgeport,
+where he spent all his leisure time with his horses and his
+yacht, for he had a great passion for the water; but now he was
+constantly running down to the city, and the horses and yacht
+were sadly neglected. He had a married sister living in New York,
+and his visits to her multiplied to such an extent that his
+mother, who lived in Bridgeport, remarked that Charles had never
+before shown so much brotherly affection, nor so much fondness
+for city life.
+
+His visits to the Museum were frequent, and it was very amusing
+to watch his new relations with Commodore Nutt, who strutted
+around like a bantam rooster whenever the General approached
+Lavinia. One day the rivals got into a friendly scuffle in the
+dressing-room, and the Commodore laid the General very neatly on
+his back.
+
+But while the Commodore was performing on the stage, and on
+Sunday afternoons and evenings, the General found plenty of
+opportunities to talk to Lavinia, and it was evident that his
+suit was progressing.
+
+Finally, Tom Thumb returned to Bridgeport, and privately begged
+Mr. Barnum to bring Lavinia up the next Saturday evening, and
+also to invite him to the house.
+
+His immediate object was that his mother might see Miss Warren.
+Mr. Barnum agreed to the proposition, and on the following
+Friday, while Miss Warren and the Commodore were sitting in the
+green-room, he said:
+
+"Lavinia, would you like to go up to Bridgeport with me
+to-morrow, and stay until Monday?"
+
+"I thank you," she replied, "it will be a great relief to get
+into the country for a couple of days."
+
+"Mr. Barnum," said the Commodore, "I should like to go up to
+Bridgeport to-morrow."
+
+"What for?" asked Barnum.
+
+"I want to see my ponies; I have not seen them for several
+months;" he replied.
+
+Mr. Barnum remarked that he was afraid he could not spare the
+Commodore from the Museum, but he said:
+
+"Oh! I can perform at half past seven o'clock and then jump on
+the evening train and go up by myself, reaching Bridgeport at
+eleven, and return early Monday morning."
+
+Fearing a clash of interests between the two little men, but
+wishing to please the Commodore, Mr. Barnum consented, especially
+as Miss Warren seemed to favor it.
+
+The Commodore had made his feelings almost as plain to the
+manager as had General Tom Thumb, but Lavinia Warren's secret was
+her own. She kept up a wonderful self-possession under the
+circumstances, for she must have known the reason of the
+General's frequent visits to the Museum. Barnum was afraid that
+she intended to reject Tom Thumb, and he told him as much; the
+General was nervous but determined; hence his anxiety to have
+Lavinia meet his mother, and also to see the extent of his
+possessions in Bridgeport.
+
+The General met his lady-love and Mr. Barnum at the station
+Saturday morning, and drove them to the latter's house in his own
+carriage--the coachman being tidily dressed, with a broad velvet
+ribbon and a silver buckle on his hat, especially for the
+occasion.
+
+After resting for a half hour at Lindencroft, he came back and
+took Lavinia out to drive. They stopped at his mother's house,
+where she saw the apartments which had been built for him and
+filled with the most gorgeous furniture, all corresponding to his
+diminutive size. Then he took her to East Bridgeport, and
+undoubtedly took occasion to point out all of the houses which he
+owned, for he depended much on his wealth making an impression on
+her.
+
+He stayed to lunch at Lindencroft, and was much pleased when
+Lavinia expressed her opinion that "Mr. Barnum or Tom Thumb owned
+about all Bridgeport."
+
+The General took his leave and returned to five o'clock dinner,
+accompanied by his mother, who was delighted with Lavinia. The
+General took Mr. Barnum aside and begged him for an invitation to
+stay all night, "For," said he, "I intend to ask her to marry me
+before the Commodore arrives."
+
+After tea Lavinia and the General sat down to play backgammon. By
+and by the rest went to their separate rooms, but Tom Thumb had
+volunteered to sit up for the Commodore, and persuaded Miss
+Warren to keep him company.
+
+The General was beaten at backgammon, and after sitting a few
+minutes, he evidently thought it time to put a clincher on his
+financial abilities. So he drew from his pocket a policy of
+insurance and handed it to Lavinia, asking her if she knew what
+it was.
+
+Examining it, she replied, "It is an insurance policy. I see you
+keep your property insured."
+
+"But the beauty of it is, it is not my property," replied the
+General, "and yet I get the benefit of the insurance in case of
+fire. You will see," he continued, unfolding the policy, "this is
+the property of Mr. Williams, but here, you will observe, it
+reads 'loss, if any, payable to Charles S. Stratton, as his
+interest may appear.' The fact is, I loaned Mr. Williams three
+thousand dollars, took a mortgage on his house, and made him
+insure it for my benefit. In this way, you perceive, I get my
+interest, and he has to pay the taxes."
+
+"That is a very wise way, I should think," remarked Lavinia.
+
+"That is the way I do all my business," replied the General,
+complacently, as he returned the huge insurance policy to his
+pocket. "You see," he continued, "I never lend any of my money
+without taking bond and mortgage security, then I have no trouble
+with taxes; my principal is secure, and I receive my interest
+regularly."
+
+The explanation seemed satisfactory to Lavinia, and the General's
+courage began to rise. Drawing his chair a little nearer to hers,
+he said:
+
+"So you are going to Europe, soon?"
+
+"Yes," replied Lavinia, "Mr. Barnum intends to take me over in a
+couple of months."
+
+"You will find it very pleasant," remarked the General; "I have
+been there twice, in fact I have spent six years abroad, and I
+like the old countries very much."
+
+"I hope I shall like the trip, and I expect I shall," responded
+Lavinia; "for Mr. Barnum says I shall visit all the principal
+cities, and he has no doubt I will be invited to appear before
+the Queen of England, the Emperor and Empress of France, the King
+of Prussia, the Emperor of Austria, and at the courts of any
+other countries which we may visit. Oh! I shall like that, it
+will be so new to me."
+
+"Yes, it will be very interesting indeed. I have visited most of
+the crowned heads," remarked the General, with an evident feeling
+of self-congratulation. "But are you not afraid you will be
+lonesome in a strange country?" asked the General.
+
+"No, I think there is no danger of that, for friends will
+accompany me," was the reply.
+
+"I wish I was going over, for I know all about the different
+countries, and could explain them all to you," remarked Tom
+Thumb.
+
+"That would be very nice," said Lavinia.
+
+"Do you think so?" said the General, moving his chair still
+closer to Lavinia's.
+
+"Of course," replied Lavinia, coolly, "for I, being a stranger to
+all the habits and customs of the people, as well as to the
+country, it would be pleasant to have some person along who could
+answer all my foolish questions."
+
+"I should like it first rate, if Mr. Barnum would engage me,"
+said the General.
+
+"I thought you remarked the other day that you had money enough,
+and was tired of traveling," said Lavinia, with a slightly
+mischievous look from one corner of her eye.
+
+"That depends upon my company while traveling," replied the
+General.
+
+"You might not find my company very agreeable."
+
+"I would be glad to risk it."
+
+"Well, perhaps Mr. Barnum would engage you, if you asked him,"
+said Lavinia.
+
+"Would you really like to have me go?" asked the General, quietly
+insinuating his arm around her waist, but hardly close enough to
+touch her.
+
+"Of course I would," was the reply.
+
+The little General's arm clasped the waist closer as he turned
+his face nearer to hers, and said:
+
+"Don't you think it would be pleasanter if we went as man and
+wife?"
+
+And after a little hesitation she agreed that it would.
+
+A moment later a carriage drove up to the door, the bell rang and
+the Commodore entered.
+
+"You here, General?" said the Commodore as he espied his rival.
+
+"Yes," said Lavinia, "Mr. Barnum asked him to stay, and we were
+waiting for you."
+
+"Where is Mr. Barnum?" asked the Commodore.
+
+"He has gone to bed," answered Tom Thumb, "but a supper has been
+prepared for you."
+
+"I am not hungry, thank you," said the Commodore petulantly,
+"What room does Mr. Barnum sleep in?"
+
+He was answered, and immediately went to Mr. Barnum whom he found
+reading in bed.
+
+"Mr. Barnum," he said sarcastically, "does Tom Thumb BOARD here?"
+
+"No," said Mr. Barnum, "Tom Thumb does not BOARD here. I invited
+him to stop over night, so don't be foolish, but go to bed."
+
+"Oh, it's no affair of mine. I don't care anything about it. Only
+I thought he'd taken up his residence here." And off he went to
+bed, in a very bad humor.
+
+Ten minutes after, Tom Thumb rushed into the room in the greatest
+excitement, and cried joyfully: "We're engaged, Mr. Barnum! We're
+engaged!"
+
+"Is that possible?" said Barnum.
+
+"Yes sir, indeed it is," responded the General, "but you must'nt
+mention it. We've agreed to tell no one, so don't say a word. I'm
+going to ask her Mother's consent Tuesday."
+
+Barnum swore secrecy, and the General went off radiant with
+happiness.
+
+The next day the family plied Lavinia with all sorts of
+questions, but not a breath passed her lips that would give the
+slightest indication as to what had transpired. She was most
+amiable to the Commodore, and as the General concluded to go home
+the next morning, the Commodore's happiness and good humor were
+fully restored. The General made a call Sunday evening and
+managed to have an interview with Lavinia. The next morning she
+and the Commodore returned to New York, without Mr. Barnum.
+
+The General called on Monday to tell Mr. Barnum that he had
+concluded to send his letter to Lavinia's mother by his friend,
+Mr. Wells, who had consented to go to Middleboro' the next day,
+and to urge the General's suit if necessary.
+
+The General went to New York on Wednesday to wait there for Mr.
+Wells's return. That same day he and Lavinia came to Mr. Barnum,
+and Tom Thumb said: "Mr. Barnum, I want somebody to tell the
+Commodore that Lavinia and I are engaged, for I'm afraid there
+will be a row when he hears of it."
+
+"Why don't you do it yourself, General?" asked Barnum.
+
+"Oh!" said the General, almost shuddering, "I would not dare do
+it, he might knock me down."
+
+"I will do it myself," said Lavinia. So the General retired and
+the Commodore was sent for. When he had joined them, Mr. Barnum
+began by saying, "Commodore, do you know what this little witch
+has been doing?"
+
+"No, I don't," he answered.
+
+"Well, she has been cutting up the greatest prank you ever heard
+of. She almost deserves to be shut up for daring to do it. Can't
+you guess what it is?"
+
+He mused a moment, and then said in a low tone, and looking full
+at her, "Engaged?"
+
+"Yes," said Barnum, "actually engaged to be married to General
+Tom Thumb. Did you ever hear of such a thing?"
+
+"Is it so, Lavinia?" he asked, earnestly.
+
+"Yes," said Lavinia, "it is really so."
+
+The Commodore turned pale, choked a little, and turning on his
+heel, he said, in a broken voice:
+
+"I hope you may be happy."
+
+As he passed out the door a tear rolled down his cheek. "That's
+pretty hard," said Barnum.
+
+"Yes it is hard," said Lavinia, "and I am very sorry. Only I
+couldn't help it. It was all the fault of your emerald and
+diamond ring."
+
+Half an hour later the Commodore returned to the office and said:
+
+"Mr. Barnum do you think it would be right for Miss Warren to
+marry Charlie Stratton if her mother should object?"
+
+"No, indeed," replied Mr. Barnum.
+
+"Well, she says she will marry him anyway; that she gives her
+mother the chance to consent, but if she objects, she will have
+her way and marry him."
+
+"On the contrary," said Barnum, "I will not permit it. She is
+engaged to go to Europe with me, and I will not release her if
+her mother does not consent to her marriage."
+
+The Commodore's eyes glistened, and he said: "Between you and me,
+Mr. Barnum, I don't believe she will consent."
+
+But she did, although at first she had objected, thinking that it
+might be merely a money-making scheme; but after she read Tom
+Thumb's letter, and heard Mr. Barnum's assurance that he would
+release her from her engagement with him, in event of the
+marriage, she consented.
+
+After the Commodore heard the news Mr. Barnum said to him:
+
+"Never mind, Commodore; Minnie Warren is a better match for you
+anyhow. She is two years younger than you, and Lavinia is older."
+
+But the Commodore replied grandly; "Thank you sir, but I would
+not marry the best woman living. I don't believe in women."
+
+Barnum then suggested that he stand with Minnie, as groom and
+bridesmaid, but he declined. A few weeks later, however, he told
+Barnum that Tom Thumb had asked him to stand with Minnie, and
+that he was going to do so.
+
+"And when I asked you, you refused," said Barnum.
+
+"It was not your business to ask me," said the Commodore
+pompously, "when the proper person asked me, I accepted."
+
+The approaching wedding was announced and created an immense
+excitement. Lavinia's levees were crowded and she not
+infrequently sold three hundred dollars' worth of photographs in
+a day. The General was engaged to exhibit and his own photograph
+was largely in demand. The Museum was so well attended, the daily
+receipts being nearly three thousand dollars, that Barnum offered
+them fifteen thousand dollars if they would postpone their
+wedding for a month and continue the levees.
+
+"No sir," said the General excitedly, "not for fifty thousand
+dollars."
+
+"Good for you Charlie," said Lavinia, "only you should have said
+one hundred thousand."
+
+It was suggested to Barnum to have the wedding take place in the
+Academy of Music and charge a good admission.
+
+But Barnum refused.
+
+Grace Church, at Broadway and Tenth St., was the scene of this
+historic wedding, which occurred at noon of Tuesday, Feb. 10,
+1863. Long before the hour designated the entire neighborhood was
+thronged by expectant and smiling crowds awaiting the arrival of
+the happy pair with their attendants, and looking with
+ill-concealed envy upon the scores of carriages that bore to the
+scene of action the fortunate possessors of cards of invitation.
+At the entrance the ubiquitous Brown was to be seen, bland and
+smiling, looking more like an honest Alderman of yore than a
+sexton, and recognizing in each new deposit of youth or beauty or
+wealth another star to shed lustre upon the extraordinary
+occasion.
+
+Excellent police arrangements, no less than the self-respect and
+decorum that always characterizes an American crowd, secured the
+utmost quiet and order. The truth was that an outsider could only
+have discovered the marriage to have been one of peculiar
+interest from the snatches of feminine gossip that met the ear,
+in which small-sized adjectives were profusely employed.
+
+The church was crowded with a gay assemblage of ladies and
+gentlemen, the former appearing in full opera costume, and the
+latter in dress coats and white neck-cloths. In front of the
+altar a platform three feet high covered with Brussels carpet had
+been erected. Pending the arrival of the wedding cortege, Mr.
+Morgan performed a number of operatic selections on the organ.
+
+At high noon the murmuring of the swarming throng outside and the
+turning of all heads townward presaged the arrival of the bridal
+party; its undoubted arrival was announced by the arrival of
+Barnum himself.
+
+The bridal party quickly entered the church, and proceeding up
+the middle aisle, took proper positions upon the platform.
+Commodore Nutt acting as groomsman, and Miss Minnie Warren as
+bridesmaid.
+
+After several operatic performances on the organ, the marriage
+services were commenced, the Rev. Dr. Taylor and the Rev. Junius
+M. Willey officiating. The petite bride was given away by the
+Rev. Mr. Palmer, at the request of her parents. Dr. Taylor
+pronounced the marital benediction, when the party left the
+church and were rapidly driven to the Metropolitan Hotel, the
+street, stoops, buildings and windows in the neighborhood of
+which were crowded with men, women and children.
+
+At 1 o'clock the reception commenced, the bride and groom,
+attended by the Commodore and Miss Minnie Warren, occupying a
+dais in one of the front parlors. The crowd soon resolved into a
+perfect jam, and for some time great confusion prevailed. After a
+time, certain arrangements were made by which the company were
+enabled to pay their respects to the little couple.
+
+The graceful form of Mrs. Charles S. Stratton was shown to
+advantage in her bridal robe, which was composed of plain white
+satin, the skirt en traine, being decorated with a flounce of
+costly point lace, headed by tulle puffings; the berthe to match.
+Her hair, slightly waved, was rolled a la Eugenie, and
+elaborately puffed in noeuds behind, in which the bridal veil was
+looped: natural orange blossoms breathed their perfume above her
+brow, and mingled their fragrance with the soft sighs of her
+gentle bosom. Roses and japonicas composed a star-shaped bouquet,
+which she held in her just-bestowed hand.
+
+Her jewels consisted of diamond necklace, bracelets, earrings,
+and a star-shaped ornament en diadem, with brooch to match.
+
+Mr. Stratton was attired in a black dress coat and a vest of
+white corded silk, with an undervest of blue silk.
+
+The Commodore was similarly attired, and Miss Minnie Warren
+appeared in a white silk skirt, with a white illusion overdress,
+trimmed half way up the skirt with bouillonnes of the same
+material, dotted with pink rosebuds. The corsage was decollete,
+with berthe to match.
+
+At 3 o'clock the bridal party left the reception room, and
+retired to their private parlor, when the company soon after
+dispersed. Upon leaving the hotel the guests were supplied with
+wedding cake, over two thousand boxes being thus distributed. In
+a parlor adjoining that used for the reception were exhibited the
+bridal presents.
+
+The jewelry and silverware were displayed in glass cases.
+
+That night, at 10 o'clock, the New York Excelsior Band serenaded
+the bridal party at the Metropolitan, when Mr. Stratton appeared
+upon the balcony and made the following speech to the large
+assemblage in front of the hotel:
+
+"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN--I thank you most sincerely for this and
+many other tokens of kindness showered upon me to-day. After
+being for more than twenty years before the public, I little
+expected at this late day, to attract so much attention. Indeed
+if I had not become a family man I should never have known how
+high I stood in public favor, and I assure you I appreciate
+highly and am truly grateful for this evidence of your esteem and
+consideration. I am soon off for foreign lands, but I shall take
+with me the pleasant recollection of your kindness to-day. But,
+ladies and gentlemen, a little woman in the adjoining apartment
+is very anxious to see us, and I must, therefore, make this
+speech, like myself, short. I kindly thank the excellent band of
+music for its melody, the sweetness of which is only exceeded by
+my anticipations of happiness in the new life before me. And now,
+Ladies and Gentlemen, wishing you all health and happiness, I bid
+you all a cordial good-night." [Applause.]
+
+The following entirely authentic correspondence, the only
+suppression being the name of the person who wrote to Dr. Taylor,
+and to whom Dr. Taylor's reply is addressed, shows how a certain
+would-be "witness" was not a witness of the famous wedding. In
+other particulars the correspondence speaks for itself.
+
+TO THE REV. DR. TAYLOR.
+
+Sir: The object of my unwillingly addressing you this note is to
+inquire what right you had to exclude myself and other owners of
+pews in Grace Church from entering it yesterday, enforced, too,
+by a cordon of police for that purpose. If my pew is not my
+property, I wish to know it; and if it is, I deny your right to
+prevent me from occupying it whenever the church is open, even at
+a marriage of mountebanks, which I would not take the trouble to
+cross the street to witness.
+                     Respectfully, your obedient servant,
+                                         W*** S***
+
+                         804 BROADWAY, NEW YORK, Feb. 16, 1863.
+MR. W*** S***
+
+Dear Sir: I am sorry, my valued friend, that you should have
+written me the peppery letter that is now before me. If the
+matter of which you complain be so utterly insignificant and
+contemptible as "a marriage of mountebanks, which you would not
+take the trouble to cross the street to witness," it surprises me
+that you should have made such strenuous, but ill-directed
+efforts to secure a ticket of admission. And why, permit me to
+ask, in the name of reason and philosophy, do you still suffer it
+to disturb you so sadly? It would, perhaps, be a sufficient
+answer to your letter, to say that your cause of complaint exists
+only in your imagination. You have never been excluded from your
+pew. As rector, I am the only custodian of the church, and you
+will hardly venture to say that you have ever applied to me for
+permission to enter, and been refused.
+
+Here I might safely rest, and leave you to the comfort of your
+own reflections in the case. But as you, in common with many
+other worthy persons, would seem to have very crude notions as to
+your rights of "property" in pews, you will pardon me for saying
+that a pew in a church is property only in a peculiar and
+restricted sense. It is not property, as your house or horse is
+property. It vests you with no fee in the soil; you cannot use it
+in any way, and in every way, and at all times, as your pleasure
+or caprice may dictate; you cannot put it to any common or
+unhallowed uses; you cannot remove it, nor injure it, nor destroy
+it. In short, you hold by purchase, and may sell the right to,
+the undisturbed possession of that little space within the church
+edifice which you call your pew during the hours of divine
+service. But even that right must be exercised decorously, and
+with a decent regard for time and place, or else you may at any
+moment be ignominiously ejected from it.
+
+I regret to be obliged to add that, by the law of custom, you
+may, during those said hours of divine service (but at no other
+time) sleep in your pew; you must, however, do so noiselessly and
+never to the disturbance of your sleeping neighbors; your
+property in your pew has this extent and nothing more. Now, if
+Mr. W*** S*** were at any time to come to me and say, "Sir, I
+would that you should grant me the use of Grace Church for a
+solemn service (a marriage, a baptism, or a funeral, as the case
+may be), and as it is desirable that the feelings of the parties
+should be protected as far as possible from the impertinent
+intrusion and disturbance of a crowd from the streets and lanes
+of the city, I beg that no one may be admitted within the doors
+of the church during the very few moments that we expect to be
+there, but our invited friends only,"--it would certainly, in
+such a case, be my pleasure to comply with your request, and to
+meet your wishes in every particular; and I think that even Mr.
+W*** S*** will agree that all this would be entirely reasonable
+and proper. Then, tell me, how would such a case differ from the
+instance of which you complain? Two young persons, whose only
+crimes would seem to be that they are neither so big, nor so
+stupid, nor so ill-mannered, nor so inordinately selfish as some
+other people, come to me and say, sir, we are about to be
+married, and we wish to throw around our marriage all the
+solemnities of religion. We are strangers in your city, and as
+there is no clergyman here standing in a pastoral relation to us,
+we have ventured to ask the favor of the bishop of New York to
+marry us, and he has kindly consented to do so; may we then
+venture a little further and request the use of your church in
+which the bishop may perform the marriage service? We assure you,
+sir, that we are no shams, no cheats, no mountebanks; we are
+neither monsters nor abortions; it is true we are little, but we
+are as God made us, perfect in our littleness. Sir, we are simply
+man and woman of like passions and infirmities with you and other
+mortals. The arrangements for our marriage are controlled by no
+"showman," and we are sincerely desirous that everything should
+be ordered with a most scrupulous regard to decorum. We hope to
+invite our relations and intimate friends, together with such
+persons as may in other years have extended civilities to either
+of us; but we pledge ourselves to you most sacredly that no
+invitation can be bought with money. Permit us to say further,
+that as we would most gladly escape from the insulting jeers, and
+ribald sneers and coarse ridicule of the unthinking multitude
+without, we pray you to allow us, at our own proper charges, so
+to guard the avenues of access from the street, as to prevent all
+unseemly tumult and disorder.
+
+I tell you, sir, that whenever, and from whomsoever, such an
+appeal is made to my Christian courtesy, although it should come
+from the very humblest of the earth, I would go calmly and
+cheerfully forward to meet their wishes, although as many W***
+S***'s as would reach from here to Kamtschatka, clothed in furs
+and frowns, should rise up to oppose me.
+
+In conclusion, I will say, that if the marriage of Charles S.
+Stratton and Lavinia Warren is to be regarded as a pageant, then
+it was the most beautiful pageant it has ever been my privilege
+to witness. If, on the contrary, it is rather to be thought of as
+a solemn ceremony, then it was as touchingly solemn as a wedding
+can possibly be rendered. It is true the bishop was not present,
+but Mr. Stratton's own pastor, the Rev. Mr. Willey, of
+Bridgeport, Connecticut, read the service with admirable taste
+and impressiveness, and the bride was given away by her mother's
+pastor and her own "next friend," a venerable Congregational
+clergyman from Massachusetts. Surely, there never was a gathering
+of so many hundreds of our best people, when everybody appeared
+so delighted with everything; surely it is no light thing to call
+forth so much innocent joy in so few moments of passing time;
+surely it is no light thing, thus to smooth the roughness and
+sweeten the acerbities which mar our happiness as we advance upon
+the wearing journey of life. Sir, it was most emphatically a high
+triumph of "Christian civilization!"
+            Respectfully submitted, by your obedient servant,
+                                         THOMAS HOUSE TAYLOR.
+
+Not long after the wedding, a lady called at Barnum's office and
+called his attention to a little six-paged pamphlet which she
+said she had written. It was called "Priests and Pigmies," and
+she asked Barnum to read it. He glanced at the title, and at once
+estimating the character of the publication, promptly declined to
+devote any portion of his valuable time to its perusal.
+
+"But you had better look at it, Mr. Barnum; it deeply interests
+you, and you may think it worth your while to buy it."
+
+"Certainly, I will buy it, if you desire," said he, tendering her
+a sixpence, which he supposed to be the price of the little
+pamphlet.
+
+"Oh! you quite misunderstand me; I mean buy the copyright and the
+entire edition, with the view of suppressing the work. It says
+some frightful things, I assure you," urged the author.
+
+He lay back in his chair and fairly roared at this exceedingly
+feeble attempt at blackmail.
+
+"But," persisted the lady, "suppose it says that your Museum and
+Grace Church are all one, what then?"
+
+"My dear madam," he replied, "you may say what you please about
+me or about my Museum; you may print a hundred thousand copies of
+a pamphlet stating that I stole the communion service, after the
+wedding, from Grace Church altar, or anything else you choose to
+write; only have the kindness to say something about me, and then
+come to me and I will properly estimate the money value of your
+services to me as an advertising agent. Good morning,
+madam,"--and she departed.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVI. POLITICAL NOTES.
+
+BARNUM BECOMES A REPUBLICAN--ILLUMINATING THE HOUSE OF A
+DEMOCRAT--THE PEACE MEETING--ELECTED TO THE LEGISLATURE--WAR ON
+THE RAILROADS---SPEECH ON THE AMENDMENT.
+
+While he had always taken an active interest in politics, it was
+many years before Barnum consented to run for any office. In 1852
+he was strongly urged to submit his name to the State Convention,
+as a candidate for the office of Governor, and although the
+Democratic party (to which he then belonged) was in the
+ascendancy, and the nomination was equivalent to election, he
+still refused.
+
+In 1860 his political convictions were changed, and he identified
+himself with the Republican party. During the exciting campaign
+of that year, which resulted in Lincoln's first election to the
+presidency, it will be remembered that the "Wide-Awake"
+associations, with their uniforms and torchlight processions,
+were organized in every city, town and village throughout the
+North.
+
+One day Mr. Barnum arrived home from New York and learned that
+the Bridgeport "Wide Awakes?" were to parade that evening and
+intended to march out to Lindencroft. Ordering two boxes of
+candles he prepared for an illumination of every window in the
+house. Many of his neighbors, among them several Democrats, came
+to Lindencroft that evening to witness the parade, and to see the
+illumination. His next door neighbor, Mr. T., was a strong
+Democrat, and before he left home, he ordered his servants to
+stay in the basement, and not show a light, thus proving by the
+darkness of his premises, the firmness of his Democratic
+principles.
+
+Barnum urged his friend James D. Johnson, who was not less a
+joker than a Democrat, to engage the attention of Mr. and Mrs.
+T., and to keep their faces turned toward Bridgeport and the
+approaching procession, while he and Mr. George A. Wells, also a
+Democrat, ran over and illuminated Mr. T.'s. house. As the
+Wide-Awakes approached and saw that the house of Mr. T. was in a
+blaze with light, they concluded that he had changed his
+politics, and gave three rousing cheers for him. Hearing his
+name, he turned and saw his house lighted from basement to attic,
+and uttering one single emphatic ejaculation, he rushed for home.
+But he was not able to extinguish the lights before the
+Wide-Awakes had gone on their way rejoicing over his apparent
+conversion.
+
+When the war broke out in 1861, Barnum was too old for active
+service in the field, but he sent four substitutes and
+contributed largely from his means to the support of the Union.
+
+After Bull Run, July 21st, 1861, "Peace Meetings" began to be
+held in different parts of the North, and especially in
+Connecticut. At these meetings it was usual to display a white
+flag bearing the word "Peace," above the national flag, and to
+listen to speeches denunciatory of the war.
+
+One of these meetings was held August 24, 1861, at Stepney, ten
+miles north of Bridgeport, and Mr. Barnum and Elias Howe, Jr.,
+inventor of the sewing machine needle, agreed to attend and hear
+for themselves whether the speeches were loyal or not. They
+communicated their intention to a number of their friends, asking
+them to go also, and at least twenty accepted the invitation. It
+was their plan to listen quietly to the harangues, and if they
+found any opposition to the government or anything calculated to
+create disaffection in the community, or liable to deter
+enlistments,--to report the matter to the authorities at
+Washington and ask that measures be taken to suppress the
+gatherings.
+
+As the carriages of these gentlemen turned into Main street they
+discovered two large omnibuses filled with soldiers who were home
+on a furlough, and who were going to Stepney. The lighter
+carriages soon outran the omnibuses, and the party arrived at
+Stepney in time to see the white flag run up above the stars and
+stripes. They stood quietly in the crowd, while the meeting was
+organized, and a preacher--Mr. Charles Smith--was invited to open
+the proceedings with prayer. "The Military and Civil History of
+Connecticut, during the war of 1861-65," by W. A. Croffut and
+John M. Morris, thus continues the account of the meeting:
+
+"He (Smith) had not, however, progressed far in his supplication,
+when he slightly opened his eyes, and beheld, to his horror, the
+Bridgeport omnibuses coming over the hill, garnished with Union
+banners, and vocal with loyal cheers. This was the signal for a
+panic; Bull Run, on a small scale was re-enacted. The devout
+Smith, and the undelivered orators, it is alleged, took refuge in
+a field of corn. The procession drove straight to the pole
+unresisted, the hostile crowd parting to let them pass; and a
+tall man--John Platt--amid some mutterings, climbed the pole,
+reached the halliards, and the mongrel banners were on the
+ground. Some of the peace-men, rallying, drew weapons on 'the
+invaders,' and a musket and a revolver were taken from them by
+soldiers at the very instant of firing. Another of the defenders
+fired a revolver, and was chased into the fields. Still others,
+waxing belligerent, were disarmed, and a number of loaded muskets
+found stored in an adjacent shed were seized. The stars and
+stripes were hoisted upon the pole, and wildly cheered. P. T.
+Barnum was then taken on the shoulders of the boys in blue, and
+put on the platform, where he made a speech full of patriotism,
+spiced with the humor of the occasion. Captain James E. Dunham
+also said a few words to the point. * * * * 'The Star Spangled
+Banner' was then sung in chorus, and a series of resolutions
+passed, declaring that 'loyal men are the rightful custodians of
+the peace of Connecticut.' Elias Howe, Jr., chairman, made his
+speech, when the crowd threatened to shoot the speakers. 'If they
+fire a gun, boys, burn the whole town, and I'll pay for it!'
+After giving the citizens wholesome advice concerning the
+substituted flag, and their duty to the government, the
+procession returned to Bridgeport with the white flag trailing in
+the mud behind an omnibus. * * * * They were received at
+Bridgeport by approving crowds, and were greeted with continuous
+cheers as they passed along."
+
+In the Spring of 1865, Barnum accepted from the Republican party
+a nomination to the Connecticut Legislature, from the town of
+Fairfield, and he did so mainly because he wished to vote for the
+then proposed amendment to the Constitution, to abolish slavery
+forever from the land.
+
+He was elected, and on arriving at Hartford the night before the
+session began, found the wire pullers at work, laying their plans
+for the election of a Speaker of the House.
+
+Barnum, with his usual penetration and shrewdness, saw that the
+railroad interests had combined in support of one of the
+candidates, and seeing in this, no promise of good to the
+community at large, he at once consulted with a few friends in
+the Legislature, and they resolved to defeat the railroad "ring,"
+if possible, in caucus. Their efforts were successful and the
+railroad's candidate was not elected.
+
+Immediately after the caucus, Barnum sought the successful
+nominee, Hon. E. K. Foster, of New Haven, and begged him not to
+appoint as chairman of the Railroad Committee the man who had
+held the office for several successive years, and who was, in
+fact, the great railroad factotum of the State. The speaker
+complied with Barnum's request, and he soon saw how important it
+was to check the strong and growing monopoly; for, as he said,
+the "outside pressure" to secure the appointment of the
+objectionable party was terrible.
+
+Although Barnum had not foreseen such a thing until he reached
+Hartford, he soon discovered that a battle with the railroad
+commissioners would be necessary, and his course was shaped
+accordingly. A majority of the commissioners were mere tools in
+the hands of the railroad companies, and one of them was actually
+a hired clerk in the office of the New York and New Haven
+Railroad Company. It was also shown that the chairman of the
+commissioners permitted most of the accidents which occurred on
+that road to be taken charge of and reported upon by their paid
+lobby agent.
+
+This was so manifestly destructive to the interests of all
+parties who might suffer from accidents on the road, or have any
+controversy with the company, that the farmers, and the
+anti-monopolist element united to defeat the chairman of the
+railroad commissioners, who was a candidate for re-election, and
+to put their own candidate in his place.
+
+Through Barnum's efforts a law was passed that no person in the
+employ of any railroad in the State, should serve as railroad
+commissioner.
+
+But the great struggle, which lasted through the entire session,
+was upon the subject of railroad passenger commutations.
+Commodore Vanderbilt had secured control of the Hudson River and
+Harlem railroads, and had increased the price of commuters'
+tickets, from two hundred to four hundred per cent. Many men
+living on the line of these roads, ten to fifty miles from New
+York, had built fine residences in the country on the strength of
+cheap transit to and from the city, and were now compelled to
+submit to the extortion. Commodore Vanderbilt was also a large
+shareholder in the New York and New Haven road, and it seemed
+evident that the same practice would be introduced there Barnum
+therefore enlisted as many as he could in a strong effort to
+strangle the outrage before it became too strong to grapple with.
+Several lawyers in the Assembly promised their aid, but before
+the final struggle came, all but one, in the whole body, had
+enlisted in favor of the railroads.
+
+What influence had been at work with these gentlemen was, of
+course, a matter of conjecture.
+
+Certain it is that all the railroad interests in the State were
+combined; and while they had plenty of money with which to carry
+out their designs, the chances were small indeed for those
+members of the legislature who were struggling for simple
+justice, and who had no pecuniary interests at stake.
+
+Nevertheless, every inch of ground was fought over, day after
+day, before the legislative railroad committee; examinations and
+cross-examinations of railroad commissioners and lobbyists were
+kept up. Scarcely more than one man, Senator Ballard, of Darien,
+lent his personal aid to Barnum in the investigation, but
+together they left not a stone unturned.
+
+The man who was prevented from being appointed chairman succeeded
+in becoming one of the railroad commissioners, but so much light
+was thrown on his connection with railroad reports, railroad laws
+and lobbying, by the indefatigable Barnum, the, the man took to
+his bed, some ten days before the close of the session, and
+actually staid there "sick " until the legislature adjourned.
+
+The amendment to the United States Constitution abolishing
+slavery met with little opposition; but the proposed amendment to
+the State Constitution, giving the right of suffrage to the
+negro, was violently opposed by the Democratic members. The
+report from the minority of the committee to whom the question
+was referred gave certain reasons for rejecting the contemplated
+amendment, and in reply to this minority report, Barnum spoke,
+May 26th, 1865, as follows:--ON THE CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT.
+
+Mr. Speaker: I will not attempt to notice at any length the
+declamation of the honorable gentleman from Milford, for
+certainly I have heard nothing from his lips approaching to the
+dignity of argument. I agree with the gentleman that the right of
+suffrage is "dearly and sacredly cherished by the white man"; and
+it is because this right is so dear and sacred, that I wish to
+see it extended to every educated moral man within our State,
+without regard to color. He tells us that one race is a vessel to
+honor, and another to dishonor; and that he has seen on ancient
+Egyptian monuments the negro represented as "a hewer of wood and
+a drawer of water." This is doubtless true, and the gentleman
+seems determined always to KEEP the negro a "vessel of dishonor,"
+and a "hewer of wood." We, on the other hand, propose to give him
+the opportunity of expanding his faculties and elevating himself
+to true manhood. He says he "hates and abhors, and despises
+demagogism." I am rejoiced to hear it, and I trust we shall see
+tangible evidence of the truth of what he professes in his
+abandonment of that slavery to party which is the mere trick and
+trap of the demagogue.
+
+When, a few days since, this honorable body voted unanimously for
+the Amendment of the United States Constitution, abolishing human
+slavery, I not only thanked God from my heart of hearts, but I
+felt like going down on my knees to the gentlemen of the
+opposition, for the wisdom they had exhibited in bowing to the
+logic of events by dropping that dead weight of slavery which had
+disrupted the Democratic party, with which I had been so long
+connected. And on this occasion I wish again to appeal to the
+wisdom and loyalty of my Democratic friends. I say Democratic
+"friends," for I am and ever was, a thorough, out and out
+Democrat. I supported General Jackson, and voted for every
+Democratic president after him, up to and including Pierce; for I
+really thought Pierce was a Democrat until he proved the
+contrary, as I conceived, in the Kansas question. My democracy
+goes for the greatest good to the greatest number, for equal and
+exact justice to all men, and for a submission to the will of the
+majority. It was the repudiation by the Southern Democracy of
+this great democratic doctrine of majority rule which opened the
+rebellion.
+
+And now, Mr. Speaker, let me remind our Democratic friends that
+the present question simply asks that a majority of the legal
+voters, the white citizens of this State, may decide whether or
+not colored men of good moral character, WHO ARE ABLE TO READ,
+and who possess all the qualifications of white voters, shall be
+entitled to the elective franchise. The opposition may have their
+own ideas, or may be in doubt upon this subject; but surely no
+true Democrat will dare to refuse permission to our
+fellow-citizens to decide the question.
+
+Negro slavery, and its legitimate outgrowths of ignorance,
+tyranny and oppression, have caused this gigantic rebellion,
+which has cost our country thousands of millions of treasure, and
+hundreds of thousands of human lives in defending a principle.
+And where was this poor, down-trodden colored race in this
+rebellion? Did they seize the "opportunity" when their masters
+were engaged with a powerful foe, to break out in insurrection,
+and massacre those tyrants who had so long held them in the most
+cruel bondage? No, Mr. Speaker, they did not do this. My
+"Democratic" friends would have done it. I would have done it.
+Irishmen, Chinamen, Portuguese, would have done it; any white man
+would have done it; but the poor black man is like a lamb in his
+nature compared with the white man. The black man possesses a
+confiding disposition, thoroughly tinctured with religious
+enthusiasm, and not characterized by a spirit of revenge. No, the
+only barbarous massacres we heard of, during the war, were those
+committed by their white masters on their poor, defenceless white
+prisoners, and to the eternal disgrace of southern white
+"Democratic" rebels, be it said, these instances of barbarism
+were numerous all through the war. When this rebellion first
+broke out, the northern Democracy raised a hue-and-cry against
+permitting the negroes to fight; but when such a measure seemed
+necessary, in order to put down traitors, these colored men took
+their muskets in hand and made their bodies a wall of defence for
+the loyal citizens of the North. And now, when our grateful white
+citizens ask from this assembly the privilege of deciding by
+their votes whether these colored men, who at least, were
+partially our saviours in the war, may or may not, under proper
+restrictions, become participants in that great salvation, I am
+amazed that men calling themselves Democrats dare refuse to grant
+this democratic measure. We wish to educate ignorant men, white
+or black. Ignorance is incompatible with the genius of our free
+institutions. In the very nature of things it jeopardizes their
+stability, and it is always unsafe to transgress the laws of
+nature. We cannot safely shut ourselves up with ignorance and
+brutality; we must educate and Christianize those who are now by
+circumstances our social inferiors.
+
+Years ago, I was afraid of foreign voters. I feared that when
+Europe poured her teeming millions of working people upon our
+shores, our extended laws of franchise would enable them to swamp
+our free institutions, and reduce us to anarchy. But much
+reflection has satisfied me that we have only to elevate these
+millions and their descendants to the standard of American
+citizenship, and we shall find sufficient of the leaven of
+liberty in our system of government to absorb all foreign
+elements and assimilate them to a truly democratic form of
+government.
+
+Mr. Speaker: We cannot afford to carry passengers and have them
+live under our government with no real vital interest in its
+perpetuity. Every man must be a joint owner.
+
+The only safe inhabitants of a free country are educated citizens
+who vote.
+
+Nor in a free government can we afford to employ journeymen; they
+may be apprenticed until they learn to read, and study our
+institutions; and then let them become joint proprietors and feel
+a proportionate responsibility. The two learned and distinguished
+authors of the minority report have been studying the science of
+ethnology and have treated us with a dissertation on the races.
+And what have they attempted to show? Why, that a race which,
+simply on account of the color of the skin, has long been buried
+in slavery at the South, and even at the North has been tabooed
+and scarcely permitted to rise above the dignity of whitewashers
+and boot-blacks, does not exhibit the same polish and refinement
+that the white citizens do who have enjoyed the advantages of
+civilization, education, Christian culture and self-respect which
+can only be attained by those who share in making the laws under
+which they live.
+
+Do our Democratic friends assume that the negroes are not human?
+I have heard professed Democrats claim even that; but do the
+authors of this minority report insist that the negro is a beast?
+Is his body not tenanted by an immortal spirit? If this is the
+position of the gentlemen, then I confess a beast cannot reason,
+and this minority committee are right in declaring that "the
+negro can develop no inventive faculties or genius for the arts."
+For although the elephant may be taught to plow, or the dog to
+carry your market-basket by his teeth, you cannot teach them to
+shave notes, to speculate in gold, or even to vote; whereas, the
+experience of all political parties shows that men may be taught
+to vote, even when they do not know what the ticket means.
+
+But if the colored man is indeed a man, then his manhood with
+proper training can be developed. His soul may appear dormant,
+his brain inactive, but there is a vitality there; and Nature
+will assert herself if you will give her the opportunity.
+
+Suppose an inhabitant of another planet should drop down upon
+this portion of our globe at mid-winter. He would find the earth
+covered with snow and ice, and congealed almost to the
+consistency of granite. The trees are leafless, everything is
+cold and barren; no green thing is to be seen; the inhabitants
+are chilled, and stalk about shivering, from place to place; he
+would exclaim, "Surely this is not life; this means annihilation.
+No flesh and blood can long endure this; this frozen earth is
+bound in the everlasting embraces of adamantine frost, and can
+never develop vegetation for the sustenance of any living thing."
+He little dreams of the priceless myriads of germs which
+bountiful Nature has safely garnered in the warm bosom of our
+mother earth; he sees no evidence of that vitality which the
+beneficent sun will develop to grace and beautify the world. But
+let him remain till March or April, and as the snow begins to
+melt away, he discovers the beautiful crocus struggling through
+the half-frozen ground; the snow-drops appear in all their chaste
+beauty; the buds of the swamp-maple shoot forth; the beautiful
+magnolia opens her splendid blossoms; the sassafras adds its
+evidence of life; the pearl-white blossoms of the dog-wood light
+up every forest: and while our stranger is rubbing his eyes in
+astonishment, the earth is covered with her emerald velvet
+carpet; rich foliage and brilliant colored blossoms adorn the
+trees; fragrant flowers are enwreathing every wayside; the
+swift-winged birds float through the air and send forth joyous
+notes of gratitude from every tree-top; the merry lambs skip
+joyfully around their verdant pasture-grounds; and everywhere is
+our stranger surrounded with life, beauty, joy and gladness.
+
+So it is with the poor African. You may take a dozen specimens of
+both sexes from the lowest type of man found in Africa; their
+race has been buried for ages in ignorance and barbarism, and you
+can scarcely perceive that they have any more of manhood or
+womanhood than so many orang-outangs or gorillas. You look at
+their low foreheads, their thick skulls and lips, their woolly
+heads, their flat noses, their dull, lazy eyes, and you may he
+tempted to adopt the language of this minority committee, and
+exclaim: Surely these people have "no inventive faculties, no
+genius for the arts, or for any of those occupations requiring
+intellect and wisdom." But bring them out into the light of
+civilization; let them and their children come into the genial
+sunshine of Christianity; teach them industry, self-reliance, and
+self-respect; let them learn what too few white Christians have
+yet understood, that cleanliness is akin to godliness, and a part
+of godliness; and the human soul will begin to develop itself.
+Each generation, blessed with churches and common schools will
+gradually exhibit the result of such culture; the low foreheads
+will be raised and widened by an active and expanded brain; the
+vacant eye of barbarism, ignorance and idleness will light up
+with the fire of intelligence, education, ambition, activity and
+Christian civilization; and you will find the immortal soul
+asserting her dignity, by the development of a man who would
+startle by his intelligence the honorable gentleman from
+Wallingford, who has presumed to compare beings made in God's
+image with "oxen and asses." That honorable gentleman, if he is
+rightly reported in the papers (I did not have the happiness to
+hear his speech), has mistaken the nature of the colored man. The
+honorable gentleman reminds me of the young man who went abroad,
+and when he returned, there was nothing in America that could
+compare with what he had seen in foreign lands. Niagara Falls was
+nowhere; the White Mountains were "knocked higher than a kite" by
+Mont Blanc; our rivers were so large that they were vulgar, when
+contrasted with the beautiful little streams and rivulets of
+Europe; our New York Central Park was eclipsed by the Bois de
+Bologne and the Champs Elysees of Paris, or Hyde or Regent Park
+of London, to say nothing of the great Phoenix Park at Dublin.
+
+"They have introduced a couple of Venetian gondolas on the large
+pond in Central Park," remarked a friend.
+
+"All very well," replied the verdant traveler, "but between you
+and me, these birds can't stand our cold climate more than one
+season." The gentleman from Wallingford evidently had as little
+idea of the true nature of the African as the young swell had of
+the pleasure-boats of Venice.
+
+Mr. Johnson, of Wallingford: "The gentleman misapprehends my
+remarks. The gentleman from Norwich had urged that the negro
+should vote because they have fought in our battles. I replied
+that oxen and asses can fight, and therefore should, on the same
+grounds, be entitled to vote."
+
+Mr. Barnum: I accept the gentleman's explanation. Doubtless
+General Grant will feel himself highly complimented when he
+learns that it requires no greater capacity to handle the musket,
+and meet armed battalions in the field, than "oxen and asses"
+possess.
+
+Let the educated free negro feel that he is a man; let him be
+trained in New England churches, schools and workshops; let him
+support himself, pay his taxes, and cast his vote, like other
+men, and he will put to everlasting shame the champions of modern
+Democracy, by the overwhelming evidence he will give in his own
+person of the great Scripture truth, that "God has made of one
+blood all the nations of men." A human soul, "that God has
+created and Christ died for," is not to be trifled with. It may
+tenant the body of a Chinaman, a Turk, an Arab or a Hottentot--it
+is still an immortal spirit; and, amid all assumptions of caste,
+it will in due time vindicate the great fact that, without regard
+to color or condition, all men are equally children of the common
+Father.
+
+A few years since, an English lord and his family were riding in
+his carriage in Liverpool. It was an elegant equipage; the
+servants were dressed in rich livery; the horses caparisoned in
+the most costly style; and everything betokened that the
+establishment belonged to a scion of England's proudest
+aristocracy. The carriage stopped in front of a palatial
+residence. At this moment a poor beggar woman rushed to the side
+of the carriage, and gently seizing the lady by the hand,
+exclaimed, "For the love of God give me something to save my poor
+sick children from starvation. You are rich; I am your poor
+sister, for God is our common Father."
+
+"Wretch!" exclaimed the proud lady, casting the woman's hand
+away; "don't call me sister; I have nothing in common with such
+low brutes as you." And the great lady doubtless thought she was
+formed of finer clay than this suffering mendicant; but when a
+few days afterward she was brought to a sick bed by the smallpox,
+contracted by touching the hand of that poor wretch, she felt the
+evidence that they belonged to the same great family, and were
+subject to the same pains and diseases.
+
+The State of Connecticut, like New Jersey, is a border State of
+New York. New York has a great commercial city, where aldermen
+rob by the tens of thousands, and where principal is studied much
+more than principle. I can readily understand how the negro has
+come to be debased at the North as well as at the South. The
+interests of the two sections in the product of negro labor were
+nearly identical. The North wanted Southern cotton and the South
+was ready in turn to buy from the North whatever was needed in
+the way of Northern supplies and manufactures. This community of
+commercial interests led to an identity in political principles,
+especially in matters pertaining to the negro race--the working
+race of the South--which produced the cotton and consumed so much
+of what Northern merchants and manufacturers sold for plantation
+use. The Southern planters were good customers and were worth
+conciliating. So when Connecticut proposed in 1818 to continue to
+admit colored men to the franchise, the South protested against
+thus elevating the negroes, and Connecticut succumbed. No other
+New England State has ever so disgraced herself; and now
+Connecticut Democrats are asked to permit the white citizens of
+this State to express their opinion in regard to reinstating the
+colored man where our Revolutionary sires placed him under the
+Constitution. Now, gentlemen, "Democrats," as you call
+yourselves, you who speak so flippantly of your "loyalty," your
+"love for the Union" and your "love for the people"; you who are
+generally talking right and voting wrong, we ask you to come
+forward and act "democratically," by letting your masters, the
+people, speak.
+
+The word "white" in the Constitution cannot be strictly and
+literally construed. The opposition express great love for white
+blood. Will they let a mulatto vote half the time, a quadroon
+three-fourths, and an octoroon seven-eighths of the time? If not,
+why not? Will they enslave seven-eighths of a white man because
+one-eighth is not Caucasian? Is this democratic? Shall not the
+majority seven control the minority one? Out on such "democracy."
+
+But a Democratic minority committee (of two) seem to have done
+something besides study ethnology. They have also paid great
+attention to fine arts, and are particularly anxious that all
+voters shall have a "genius for the arts." I would like to ask
+them if it has always been political practice to insist that
+every voter in the great "unwashed" and "unterrified" of any
+party should become a member of the Academy of Arts before he
+votes the "regular" ticket? I thought he was received into the
+full fellowship of a political party if he could exhibit
+sufficient "inventive faculties and genius for the arts," to
+enable him to paint a black eye. Can a man whose "genius for the
+arts" enables him to strike from the shoulder scientifically, be
+admitted to full fellowship in a political party? Is it evident
+that the political artist has studied the old masters, if he
+exhibits his genius by tapping an opponent's head with a
+shillelah? The oldest master in this school of art was Cain; and
+so canes have been made to play their part in politics, at the
+polls and even in the United States Senate Chamber.
+
+Is "genius for the arts and those occupations requiring intellect
+and wisdom" sufficiently exemplified in adroitly stuffing
+ballot-boxes, forging soldiers' votes, and copying a directory,
+as has been done, as the return list of votes? Is the "inventive
+faculty" of "voting early and often" a passport to political
+brotherhood? Is it satisfactory evidence of "artistic" genius, to
+head a mob? and a mob which is led and guided by political
+passion, as numerous instances in our history prove, is the worst
+of mobs. Is it evidence of "high art" to lynch a man by hanging
+him to the nearest tree or lamp-post? Is a "whisky scrimmage" one
+of the lost arts restored? We all know how certain "artists" are
+prone to embellish elections and to enhance the excitements of
+political campaigns by inciting riots, and the frequency with
+which these disgraceful outbreaks have occurred of late,
+especially in some of the populous cities, is cause for just
+alarm. It is dangerous "art."
+
+Mr. Speaker: I repeat that I am a friend to the Irishman. I have
+traveled through his native country and have seen how he is
+oppressed. I have listened to the eloquent and patriotic appeals
+of Daniel O'Connell, in Conciliation Hall, in Dublin, and I have
+gladly contributed to his fund for ameliorating the condition of
+his countrymen. I rejoice to see them rushing to this land of
+liberty and independence; and it is because I am their friend
+that I denounce the demagogues who attempt to blind and mislead
+them to vote in the interests of any party against the interests
+of humanity, and the principles of true democracy. My neighbors
+will testify that at mid-winter I employ Irishmen by the hundred
+to do work that is not absolutely necessary, in order to help
+them support their families.
+
+After hearing the minority report last week, I began to feel that
+I might be disfranchised, for I have no great degree of "genius
+for the arts;" I felt, therefore, that I must get "posted" on
+that subject as soon as possible. I at once sauntered into the
+Senate Chamber to look at the paintings: there I saw portraits of
+great men, and I saw two empty frames from which the pictures had
+been removed. These missing paintings, I was told, were portraits
+of two ex-Governors of the State, whose position on political
+affairs was obnoxious to the dominant party in the Legislature;
+and especially obnoxious were the supposed sentiments of these
+governors on the war. Therefore, the Senate voted to remove the
+pictures, and thus proved, as it would seem, that there is an
+intimate connection between politics and art.
+
+I have repeatedly traveled through every State in the South, and
+I assert, what every intelligent officer and soldier who has
+resided there will corroborate, that the slaves, as a body are
+more intelligent than the poor whites. No man who has not been
+there can conceive to what a low depth of ignorance the poor
+snuff-taking, clay-eating whites of some portions of the South
+have descended. I trust the day is not far distant when the
+"common school" shall throw its illuminating rays through this
+Egyptian pall.
+
+I have known slave mechanics to be sold for $3,000, and even
+$5,000 each, and others could not be bought at all; and I have
+seen intelligent slaves acting as stewards for their masters,
+traveling every year to New Orleans, Nashville, and even to
+Cincinnati, to dispose of their masters' crops. The tree colored
+citizens of Opelousas, St. Martinsville, and all the Attakapas
+country in Louisiana, are as respectable and intelligent as an
+ordinary community of whites. They speak the French and English
+languages, educate their children in music and "the arts," and
+they pay their taxes on more than fifteen millions of dollars.
+
+Gentlemen of the opposition, I beseech you to remember that our
+State and our country ask from us something more than party
+tactics. It is absolutely necessary that the loyal blacks at the
+South should vote, in order to save the loyal whites. Let
+Connecticut, without regard to party, set them an example that
+shall influence the action at the South, and prevent a new form
+of slavery from arising there, which shall make all our
+expenditure of blood and treasure fruitless.
+
+But some persons have this color prejudice simply by the force of
+education, and they say, "Well, a nigger is a nigger, and he
+can't be anything else. I hate niggers, anyhow." Twenty years ago
+I crossed the Atlantic, and among our passengers was an Irish
+judge, who was coming out to Newfoundland as chief justice. He
+was an exceedingly intelligent and polished gentleman, and
+extremely witty. The passengers from the New England States and
+those from the South got into a discussion on the subject of
+slavery, which lasted three days. The Southerners were finally
+worsted, and when their arguments were exhausted, they fell back
+on the old story, by saying: "Oh! curse a nigger, he ain't half
+human anyhow; he had no business to be a nigger, etc." One of the
+gentlemen then turned to the Irish judge, and asked his opinion
+of the merits of the controversy. The judge replied:
+
+"Gentlemen, I have listened with much edification to your
+arguments pro and con during three days. I was quite inclined to
+think the anti-slavery gentlemen had justice and right on their
+side, but the last argument from the South has changed my mind. I
+say a 'nigger has no business to be a nigger,' and we should kick
+him out of society and trample him under foot--always provided,
+gentlemen, you prove he was born black at his own particular
+request. If he had no word to say in the matter, of course he is
+blameless for his color, and is entitled to the same respect that
+other men are who properly behave themselves!"
+
+Mr. Speaker: I am no politician; I came to this legislature
+simply because I wish to have the honor of voting for the two
+constitutional amendments--one for driving slavery entirely out
+of our country; the other to allow men of education and good
+moral character to vote, regardless of the color of their skins.
+To give my voice for these two philanthropic, just and Christian
+measures is all the glory I ask legislativewise. I care nothing
+whatever for any sect or party under heaven, as such. I have no
+axes to grind, no logs to roll, no favors to ask. All I desire is
+to do what is right, and prevent what is wrong. I believe in no
+"expediency" that is not predicated of justice, for in all
+things--politics, as well as everything else--I know that
+"honesty is the best policy." A retributive Providence will
+unerringly and speedily search out all wrong-doing; hence, right
+is always the best in the long run. Certainly,, in the light of
+the great American spirit of liberty and equal rights which is
+sweeping over this country, and making the thrones of tyrants
+totter in the Old World, no party can afford to carry slavery,
+either of body or of mind. Knock off your manacles and let the
+man go free. Take down the blinds from his intellect, and let in
+the light of education and Christian culture. When this is done
+you have developed a man. Give him the responsibility of a man
+and the self-respect of a man, by granting him the right of
+suffrage, Let universal education, and the universal franchise be
+the motto of free America, and the toiling millions of Europe,
+who are watching you with such intense interest, will hail us as
+their saviours. Let us loyally sink "party" on this question, and
+go for "God and our Country." Let no man attach an eternal stigma
+to his name by shutting his eyes to the great lesson of the hour,
+and voting against permitting the people to express their opinion
+on this important subject. Let us unanimously grant this truly
+democratic boon. Then, when our laws of franchise are settled on
+a just basis, let future parties divide where they honestly
+differ on State or national questions which do nor trench upon
+the claims of manhood or American citizenship.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVII. BURNING OF THE AMERICAN MUSEUM.
+
+HOW BARNUM RECEIVED THE TIDINGS--HUMOROUS DESCRIPTION OF THE
+FIRE--A PUBLIC CALAMITY--GREELEY'S ADVICE--INTENTION TO
+RE-ESTABLISH THE MUSEUM--SPEECH AT EMPLOYEES' BENEFIT.
+
+On the 13th day of July, 1865, when Barnum was speaking in the
+Legislature at Hartford, against the railroad schemes, a telegram
+was handed him from his son-in-law and assistant manager in New
+York, S. H. Hurd, saying that the American Museum was in flames
+and its total destruction certain.
+
+Barnum glanced at the dispatch, folded and laid it in his desk,
+and went calmly on with his speech. At the conclusion of his
+remarks, the bill which he was advocating was voted upon and
+carried, and the House adjourned.
+
+Not until then did Barnum hand the telegram to his friend,
+William G. Coe, of Winsted, who immediately communicated the
+intelligence to several members.
+
+Warm sympathizers at once crowded around him, and one of his
+strongest opponents pushing forward, seized his hand, and said:
+"Mr. Barnum, I am truly sorry to hear of your great misfortune."
+
+"Sorry," replied Barnum; "why, my dear sir, I shall not have time
+to be sorry in a week! It will take me at least that length of
+time before I can get over laughing at having whipped you all so
+nicely on that bill."
+
+But he did find time to be sorry when, next day, he went to New
+York and saw nothing of what had been the American Museum but a
+smouldering mass of debris.
+
+Here was destroyed, in a few hours, the result of many years'
+toil in accumulating from every part of the world myriads of
+curious productions of nature and art--a collection which a half
+a million of dollars and a quarter of a century could not
+restore.
+
+In addition to these, there were many Revolutionary relics and
+other articles of historical interest that could never be
+duplicated. Not a thousand dollars worth of property was saved;
+the loss was irreparable, and the insurance was only forty
+thousand dollars.
+
+The fire probably originated in the engine-room, where steam was
+constantly kept up to pump fresh air into the waters of the
+aquaria and to propel the immense fans for cooling the atmosphere
+of the rooms.
+
+All the New York newspapers made a great "sensation" of the fire,
+and the full particulars were copied in journals throughout the
+country. A facetious reporter; Mr. Nathan D. Urner, of the
+Tribune, wrote the following amusing account, which appeared in
+that journal, July 14, 1865, and was very generally quoted from
+and copied by provincial papers, many of whose readers accepted
+every line of the glowing narrative as "gospel truth":
+
+"Soon after the breaking out of the conflagration, a number of
+strange and terrible howls and moans proceeding from the large
+apartment in the third floor of the Museum, corner of Ann street
+and Broadway, startled the throngs who had collected in front of
+the burning building, and who were at first under the impression
+that the sounds must proceed from human beings unable to effect
+their escape. Their anxiety was somewhat relieved on this score,
+but their consternation was by no means decreased upon learning
+that the room in question was the principal chamber of the
+menagerie connected with the Museum, and that there was imminent
+danger of the release of the animals there confined, by the
+action of the flames. Our reporter fortunately occupied a room on
+the north corner of Ann street and Broadway, the windows of which
+looked immediately into this apartment; and no sooner was he
+apprised of the fire than he repaired there, confident of finding
+items in abundance. Luckily the windows of the Museum were
+unclosed, and he had a perfect view of almost the entire interior
+of the apartment. The following is his statement of what
+followed, in his own language.
+
+"Protecting myself from the intense heat as well as I could by
+taking the mattress from the bed and erecting it as a bulwark
+before the window, with only enough space reserved on the top so
+as to look out, I anxiously observed the animals in the opposite
+room. Immediately opposite the window through which I gazed was a
+large cage containing a lion and lioness. To the right hand was
+the three-storied cage, containing monkeys at the top, two
+kangaroos in the second story, and a happy family of cats, rats,
+adders, rabbits, etc., in the lower apartment. To the left of the
+lions' cage was the tank containing the two vast alligators, and
+still further to the left, partially hidden from my sight, was
+the grand tank containing the great white whale, which has
+created such a furore in our sightseeing midst for the past few
+weeks. Upon the floor were caged the boa-constrictor, anacondas
+and rattlesnakes, whose heads would now and then rise menacingly
+through the top of the cage. In the extreme right was the cage,
+entirely shut from my view at first, containing the Bengal tiger
+and the Polar bear, whose terrific growls could be distinctly
+heard from behind the partition. With a simultaneous bound the
+lion and his mate sprang against the bars, which gave way and
+came down with a great crash, releasing the beasts, which for a
+moment, apparently amazed at their sudden liberty, stood in the
+middle of the floor lashing their sides with their tails and
+roaring dolefully.
+
+"Almost at the same moment the upper part of the three-storied
+cage, consumed by the flames, fell forward, letting the rods drop
+to the floor, and many other animals were set free. Just at this
+time the door fell through and the flames and smoke rolled in
+like a whirlwind from the Hadean river Cocytus. A horrible scene
+in the right-hand corner of the room, a yell of indescribable
+agony, and a crashing, grating sound, indicated that the tiger
+and Polar bear were stirred up to the highest pitch of
+excitement. Then there came a great crash, as of the giving way
+of the bars of their cage. The flames and smoke momentarily
+rolled back, and for a few seconds the interior of the room was
+visible in the lurid light of the flames, which revealed the
+tiger and the lion, locked together in close combat.
+
+"The monkeys were perched around the windows, shivering with
+dread, and afraid to jump out. The snakes were writhing about,
+crippled and blistered by the heat, darting out their forked
+tongues, and expressing their rage and fear in the most sibilant
+of hisses. The 'Happy Family' were experiencing an amount of
+beatitude which was evidently too cordial for philosophical
+enjoyment. A long tongue of flame had crept under the cage,
+completely singing every hair from the cat's body. The felicitous
+adder was slowly burning in two and busily engaged in
+impregnating his organic system with his own venom. The joyful
+rat had lost his tail by a falling bar of iron; and the beatific
+rabbit, perforated by a red-hot nail, looked as if nothing would
+be more grateful than a cool corner in some Esquimaux farm-yard.
+The members of the delectated convocation were all huddled
+together in the bottom of their cage, which suddenly gave way,
+precipitating them out of view in the depths below, which by this
+time were also blazing like the fabled Tophet.
+
+"At this moment the flames rolled again into the room, and then
+again retired. The whale and alligators were by this time
+suffering dreadful torments. The water in which they swam was
+literally boiling. The alligators dashed fiercely about,
+endeavoring to escape, and opening and shutting their great jaws
+in ferocious torture; but the poor whale, almost boiled, with
+great ulcers bursting from his blubbery sides, could only feebly
+swim about, though blowing excessively, and every now and then
+sending up great fountains of spray. At length, crack went the
+glass sides of the great cases, and whale and alligators rolled
+out on the floor with the rushing and steaming water. The whale
+died easily, having been pretty well used up before. A few great
+gasps and a convulsive flap or two of his mighty flukes were his
+expiring spasm. One of the alligators was killed almost
+immediately by falling across a great fragment of shattered
+glass, which cut open his stomach and let out the greater part of
+his entrails to the light of day. The remaining alligator became
+involved in a controversy with an anaconda, and joined the melee
+in the centre of the flaming apartment.
+
+"A number of birds which were caged in the upper part of the
+building were set free by some charitably inclined person at the
+first alarm of fire, and at intervals they flew out. There were
+many valuable tropical birds, parrots, cockatoos, mockingbirds,
+humming-birds, etc., as well as some vultures and eagles, and one
+condor. Great excitement existed among the swaying crowds in the
+streets below as they took wing. There were confined in the same
+room a few serpents, which also obtained their liberty; and soon
+after the rising and devouring flames began to enwrap the entire
+building, a splendid and emblematic sight was presented to the
+wondering and upgazing throngs. Bursting through the central
+casement, with flap of wings and lashing coils, appeared an eagle
+and a serpent wreathed in fight. For a moment they hung poised in
+mid-air, presenting a novel and terrible conflict. It was the
+earth and air (or their respective representatives) at war for
+mastery; the base and the lofty, the groveller and the soarer,
+were engaged in deadly battle. At length the flat head of the
+serpent sank; his writhing, sinuous form grew still; and wafted
+upward by the cheers of the gazing multitude, the eagle, with a
+scream of triumph, and bearing his prey in his iron talons,
+soared towards the sun. Several monkeys escaped from the burning
+building to the neighboring roofs and streets; and considerable
+excitement was caused by the attempts to secure them. One of the
+most amusing incidents in this respect, was in connection with
+Mr. James Gordon Bennett. The veteran editor of the Herald was
+sitting in his private office, with his back to the open window,
+calmly discussing with a friend the chances that the Herald
+establishment would escape the conflagration, which at that time
+was threateningly advancing up Ann street towards Nassau street.
+In the course of his conversation, Mr. Bennett observed:
+'Although I have usually had good luck in cases of fire, they say
+that the devil is ever at one's shoulder, and'--here an
+exclamation from his friend interrupted him, and turning quickly
+he was considerably taken aback at seeing the devil himself, or
+something like him, at his very shoulder as he spoke. Recovering
+his equanimity, with the ease and suavity which is usual with him
+in all company, Mr. Bennett was about to address the intruder,
+when he perceived that what he had taken for the gentleman in
+black was nothing more than a frightened orang-outang. The poor
+creature, but recently released from captivity, and doubtless
+thinking that he might fill some vacancy in the editorial corps
+of the paper in question, had descended by the water-pipe and
+instinctively taken refuge in the inner sanctum of the
+establishment. Although the editor--perhaps from the fact that he
+saw nothing peculiarly strange in the visitation--soon regained
+his composure, it was far otherwise with his friend, who
+immediately gave the alarm. Mr. Hudson rushed in and boldly
+attacked the monkey, grasping him by the throat. The book-editor
+next came in, obtaining a clutch upon the brute by the ears; the
+musical critic followed and seized the tail with both hands, and
+a number of reporters, armed with inkstands and sharpened
+pencils, came next, followed by a dozen policemen with brandished
+clubs; at the same time, the engineer in the basement received
+the preconcerted signal and got ready his hose, wherewith to pour
+boiling hot water upon the heads of, those in the streets, in
+case it should prove a regular systematized attack by gorillas,
+Brazil apes, and chimpanzees. Opposed to this formidable
+combination the rash intruder fared badly, and was soon in
+durance vile. Numerous other incidents of a similar kind
+occurred; but some of the most amusing were in connection with
+the wax figures.
+
+"Upon the same impulse which prompts men in time of fire to fling
+valuable looking-glasses out of three-story windows, and at the
+same time tenderly to lower down feather beds--soon after the
+Museum took fire, a number of sturdy firemen rushed into the
+building to carry out the wax figures. There were thousands of
+valuable articles which might have been saved if there had been
+less of solicitude displayed for the miserable effigies which are
+usually exhibited under the appellation of 'wax figures.' As it
+was, a dozen firemen rushed into the apartment where the figures
+were kept, amid a multitude of crawling snakes, chattering
+monkeys and escaped paroquets. The 'Dying Brigand' was
+unceremoniously throttled and dragged towards the door; liberties
+were taken with the tearful 'Senorita' who has so long knelt and
+so constantly wagged her doll's head at his side; the mules of
+the other bandits were upset, and they themselves roughly seized.
+The full-length statue of P. T. Barnum fell down of its own
+accord, as if disgusted with the whole affair. A red-shined
+fireman seized with either hand Franklin Pierce and James
+Buchanan by their coat-collars, tucked the Prince Imperial of
+France under one arm and the Veiled Murderess under the other,
+and coolly departed for the street. Two ragged boys quarreled
+over the Tom Thumb, but at length settled the controversy by one
+of them taking the head, the other satisfying himself with the
+legs below the knees. They evidently had Tom under their thumbs,
+and intended to keep him down. While the curiosity-seeking
+policeman was garroting Benjamin Franklin, with the idea of
+abducting him, a small monkey, flung from the windowsill by the
+strong hand of an impatient fireman, made a straight dive,
+hitting Poor Richard just below the waistcoat, and passing
+through his stomach, as fairly as the Harlequin in the 'Green
+Monster' pantomime ever pierced the picture with the slit in it,
+which always hangs so conveniently low and near. Patrick Henry
+had his teeth knocked out by a flying missile, and in carrying
+Daniel Lambert down stairs, he was found to be so large that they
+had to break off his head in order to get him through the door.
+At length the heat became intense, the 'figgers' began to
+perspire freely, and the swiftly approaching flames compelled all
+hands to desist from any further attempt at rescue. Throwing a
+parting glance behind as we passed down the stairs, we saw the
+remaining dignitaries in a strange plight. Some one had stuck a
+cigar in General Washington's mouth, and thus, with his chapeau
+crushed down over his eyes and his head leaning upon the ample
+lap of Moll Pitcher, the Father of his Country led the van of as
+sorry a band of patriots as not often comes within one's
+experience to see. General Marion was playing a dummy game of
+poker with General Lafayette; Governor Morris was having a set-to
+with Nathan Lane, and James Madison was executing a Dutch polka
+with Madam Roland on one arm and Luicretia Borgia on the other.
+The next moment the advancing flames compelled us to retire.
+
+"We believe that all the living curiosities were saved; but the
+giant girl, Anna Swan, was only rescued with the utmost
+difficulty. There was not a door through which her bulky frame
+could obtain a passage. It was likewise feared that the stairs
+would break down, even if she should reach them. Her best friend,
+the living skeleton, stood by her as long as he dared, but then
+deserted her, while, as the heat grew in intensity, the
+perspiration rolled from her face in little brooks and rivulets,
+which pattered musically upon the floor. At length, as a last
+resort, the employees of the place procured a lofty derrick which
+fortunately happened to be standing near, and erected it
+alongside of the Museum. A portion of the wall was then broken
+off on each side of the window, the strong tackle was got in
+readiness, the tall woman was made fast to one end and swung over
+the heads of the people in the street, with eighteen men grasping
+the other extremity of the line, and lowered down from the third
+story, amid enthusiastic applause. A carriage of extraordinary
+capacity was in readiness, and, entering this, the young lady was
+driven away to a hotel.
+
+"When the surviving serpents, that were released by the partial
+burning of the box in which they were contained, crept along on
+the floor to the balcony of the Museum and dropped on the
+sidewalk, the crowd, seized with St. Patrick's aversion to the
+reptiles, fled with such precipitate haste that they knocked each
+other down and trampled on one another in the most reckless and
+damaging manner.
+
+"Hats were lost, coats torn, boots burst and pantaloons dropped
+with magnificent miscellaneousness, and dozens of those who rose
+from the miry streets into which they had been thrown looked like
+the disembodied spirits of a mud bank. The snakes crawled on the
+sidewalk and into Broadway, where some of them died from injuries
+received, and others were dispatched by the excited populace.
+Several of the serpents of the copper-head species escaped the
+fury of the tumultuous masses, and, true to their instincts,
+sought shelter in the World and News offices. A large black bear
+escaped from the burning Museum into Ann street, and then made
+his way into Nassau, and down that thoroughfare into Wall, where
+his appearance caused a sensation. Some superstitious persons
+believed him the spirit of a departed Ursa Major, and others of
+his fraternity welcomed the animal as a favorable omen. The bear
+walked quietly along to the Custom House, ascended the steps of
+the building, and became bewildered, as many a biped bear has
+done before him. He seemed to lose his sense of vision, and, no
+doubt, endeavoring to operate for a fall, walked over the side of
+the steps and broke his neck. He succeeded in his object, but it
+cost him dearly. The appearance of Bruin in the street sensibly
+affected the stock market, and shares fell rapidly; but when he
+lost his life in the careless manner we have described, shares
+advanced again, and the Bulls triumphed once more.
+
+"Broadway and its crossings have not witnessed a denser throng
+for months than assembled at the fire yesterday. Barnum's was
+always popular, but it never drew so vast a crowd before. There
+must have been forty thousand people on Broadway, between Maiden
+Lane and Chambers street, and a great portion stayed there until
+dusk. So great was the concourse of people that it was with
+difficulty pedestrians or vehicles could pass.
+
+"After the fire several high-art epicures, groping among the
+ruins, found choice morsels of boiled whale, roasted kangaroo and
+fricasseed crocodile, which, it is said, they relished; though
+the many would have failed to appreciate such rare edibles.
+Probably the recherche epicures will declare the only true way to
+prepare those meats is to cook them in a Museum wrapped in
+flames, in the same manner that the Chinese, according to Charles
+Lamb, first discovered roast pig in a burning house, and ever
+afterward set a house on fire with a pig inside, when they wanted
+that particular food."
+
+All the New York journals, and many more in other cities,
+editorially expressed their sympathy with the misfortune, and
+their sense of the loss the community had sustained in the
+destruction of the American Museum. The following editorial is
+from the New York Tribune of July 14, 1865:
+
+"The destruction of no building in this city could have caused so
+much excitement and so much regret as that of Barnum's Museum.
+The collection of curiosities was very large, and though many of
+them may not have had much intrinsic or memorial value, a
+considerable portion was certainly of great worth for any Museum.
+But aside from this, pleasant memories clustered about the place,
+which for so many years has been the chief resort for amusement
+to the common people who cannot often afford to treat themselves
+to a night at the more expensive theatres, while to the children
+of the city, Barnum's has been a fountain of delight, ever
+offering new attractions as captivating and as implicitly
+believed in as the Arabian Nights Entertainments: Theatre,
+Menagerie and Museum, it amused, instructed, and astonished. If
+its thousands and tens of thousands of annual visitors were
+bewildered sometimes with a Wooly Horse, a What is It? or a
+Mermaid, they found repose and certainty in a Giraffe, a Whale or
+a Rhinoceros. If wax effigies of pirates and murderers made them
+shudder lest those dreadful figures should start out of their
+glass cases and repeat their horrid deeds, they were reassured by
+the presence of the mildest and most amiable of giants, and the
+fattest of mortal women, whose dead weight alone could crush all
+the wax figures into their original cakes. It was a source of
+unfailing interest to all country visitors, and New York to many
+of them was only the place that held Barnum's Museum. It was the
+first thing--often the only thing--they visited when they came
+among us, and nothing that could have been contrived, out of our
+present resources, could have offered so many attractions, unless
+some more ingenious showman had undertaken to add to Barnum's
+collection of waxen criminals by putting in a cage the live
+Boards of the Common Council. We mourn its loss, but not as
+without consolation. Barnum's Museum is gone, but Barnum himself,
+happily, did not share the fate of his rattlesnakes and his, at
+least, most "un-Happy Family." There are fishes in the seas and
+beasts in the forest; birds still fly in the air, and strange
+creatures still roam in the deserts; giants and pigmies still
+wander up and down the earth; the oldest man, the fattest woman,
+and the smallest baby are still living, and Barnum will find
+them.
+
+"Or even if none of these things or creatures existed, we could
+trust to Barnum to make them out of hand. The Museum, then, is
+only a temporary loss, and much as we sympathize with the
+proprietor, the public may trust to his well-known ability and
+energy to soon renew a place of amusement which was a source of
+so much innocent pleasure, and had in it so many elements of
+solid excellence."
+
+As already stated, Mr. Barnum's insurance was but forty thousand
+dollars while the loss was fully four hundred thousand, and as
+his premium was five per cent., he had already paid the insurance
+companies more than they returned to him.
+
+His first impulse, on reckoning up his losses, was to retire from
+active life and all business occupations, beyond what his real
+estate interests in Bridgeport and New York would compel. He went
+to his old friend, Horace Greeley, and asked for advice on the
+subject.
+
+"Accept this fire as a notice to quit, and go a-fishing," said
+Mr. Greeley.
+
+"What?" exclaimed Barnum.
+
+"Yes, go a-fishing," replied Greeley. "Why, I have been wanting
+to go for thirty years, and have never yet found time to do so."
+
+And but for two considerations Barnum might have taken this
+advice. One hundred and fifty employees were thrown out of work
+at a season when it would have been difficult to get anything
+else to do. That was the most important consideration. Then, too,
+Barnum felt that a large city like New York needed a good Museum,
+and that his experience of a quarter of a century in that
+direction afforded the greatest facilities for founding another
+establishment of the kind. So he took a few days for reflection.
+
+The Museum employees were tendered a benefit at the Academy of
+Music, at which most of the dramatic artists in the city gave
+their services. At the conclusion Barnum was called for, and made
+a brilliant speech, in which he announced that he had decided to
+establish another Museum, and that, in order to give present
+occupation to his employees, he had engaged the Winter Garden
+Theatre for a few weeks, his new establishment promising to be
+ready by fall.
+
+The New York Sun commented on the speech as follows:
+
+"One of the happiest impromptu oratorical efforts that we have
+heard for some time was that made by Barnum at the benefit
+performance given for his employees on Friday afternoon. If a
+stranger wanted to satisfy himself how the great showman had
+managed so to monopolize the ear and eye of the public during his
+long career, he could not have had a better opportunity of doing
+so than by listening to this address. Every word, though
+delivered with apparent carelessness, struck a key-note in the
+hearts of his listeners. Simple, forcible and touching, it showed
+how thoroughly this extraordinary man comprehends the character
+of his countrymen, and how easily he can play upon their
+feelings.
+
+"Those who look upon Barnum as a mere charlatan, have really no
+knowledge of him. It would be easy to demonstrate that the
+qualities that have placed him in his present position of
+notoriety and affluence would, in another pursuit, have raised
+him to far greater eminence. In his breadth of views, his
+profound knowledge of mankind, his courage under reverses, his
+indomitable perseverance, his ready eloquence and his admirable
+business tact, we recognize the elements that are conducive to
+success in most other pursuits. More than almost any other living
+man, Barnum may be said to be a representative type of the
+American mind."
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXVIII. POLITICAL LIFE.
+
+IN THE CONNECTICUT LEGISLATURE--THE GREAT RAILROAD
+FIGHT--BARNUM'S EFFECTIVE STROKE--CANVASSING FOR A UNITED STATES
+SENATOR--BARNUM'S CONGRESSIONAL CAMPAIGN--A CHALLENGE THAT WAS
+NOT ACCEPTED.
+
+During his legislative career Mr. Barnum made many new friends
+and pleasant acquaintances, and there were many events great and
+small which tended to make the session memorable. Barnum was by
+no means an idle member. On several occasions, indeed, he took a
+most conspicuous part in debates and in framing legislation. On
+one occasion, a Representative, who was a lawyer, introduced
+resolutions to reduce the number of Representatives, urging that
+the "House" was too large and ponderous a body to work smoothly;
+that a smaller number of persons could accomplish business more
+rapidly and completely; and, in fact, that the Connecticut
+Legislature was so large that the members did not have time to
+get acquainted with each other before the body adjourned sine
+die. Barnum replied, that the larger the number of
+Representatives, the more difficult it would be to tamper with
+them; and if they all could not become personally acquainted, so
+much the better, for there would be fewer "rings," and less
+facilities for forcing improper legislation.
+
+"As the House seems to be thin now, I will move to lay my
+resolutions on the table," remarked the member; "but I shall call
+them up when there is a full House."
+
+"According to the gentleman's own theory," Barnum replied, "the
+smaller the number, the surer are we to arrive at correct
+conclusions. Now, therefore, is just the time to decide; and I
+move that the gentleman's resolutions be considered." This
+proposition was seconded amid a roar of laughter; and the
+resolutions were almost unanimously voted down, before the member
+fairly comprehended what was going on. He afterwards acknowledged
+it as a pretty fair joke, and at any rate as an effective one.
+
+At this time Connecticut had two capitals, Hartford and New
+Haven. The State House at Hartford was a wretched old building,
+too small and entirely unfit for the purposes to which it was
+devoted; and that at New Haven was scarcely better. Barnum made a
+strong effort to secure the erection of new buildings in both
+cities, and was made chairman of the committee having the matter
+in charge. During his investigations he ascertained that
+Bridgeport, Middletown and Meriden would each be willing to erect
+a fine new State House at its own cost, for the sake of being
+made the capital of the State. Thus the jealousy of Hartford and
+New Haven was greatly aroused, and committees of citizens waited
+upon Mr. Barnum, beseeching him not to press the matter of
+removing the capital. In the end nothing definite was done, but
+years afterward Hartford was made the sole capital and one of the
+finest public buildings in the world was erected there.
+
+The most notable event of the whole session however occurred near
+its close, when Barnum introduced a bill to amend the railroad
+law of the State by inserting in it the following:
+
+"Section 508. No railroad company, which has had a system of
+commutation fares in force for more than four years, shall
+abolish, alter, or modify the same, except for the regulation of
+the price charged for such commutation; and such price shall, in
+no case, be raised to an extent that shall alter the ratio
+between such commutation and the rates then charged for way fare,
+on the railroad of such company."
+
+The New York and New Haven Railroad Company seemed determined to
+move heaven and earth to prevent the passage of this law. The
+halls of legislation were thronged with railroad lobbyists, who
+button-holed nearly every member. Barnum's motives were attacked,
+and the most foolish slanders were circulated. Not only every
+legal man in the House was arrayed against him, but occasionally
+a "country member," who had promised to stick by and aid in
+checking the cupidity of railroad managers, would drop off, and
+be found voting on the other side. "I devoted," says Barnum,
+"many hours, and even days, to explaining the true state of
+things to the members from the rural regions, and, although the
+prospect of carrying this great reform looked rather dark, I felt
+that I had a majority of the honest and disinterested members of
+the House with me. Finally, Senator Ballard informed me that he
+had canvassed the Senate, and was convinced that the bill could
+be carried through that body if I could be equally successful
+with the House."
+
+The date of the final debate and vote was fixed for the morning
+of July 13. At that time the excitement was intense. The State
+House was crowded with railroad lobbyists; for nearly every
+railroad in the State had made common cause with the New York and
+New Haven Company, and every Representative was in his seat,
+excepting the sick man, who had doctored the railroads till he
+needed doctoring himself. The debate was led off by skirmishers
+on each side, and was finally closed on the part of the railroads
+by Mr. Harrison, of New Haven, who was chairman of the railroad
+committee. Mr. Harrison was a close and forcible debater and a
+clear-headed lawyer. His speech exhibited considerable thought,
+and his earnestness and high character as a gentleman of honor
+carried much weight. Besides, his position as chairman of the
+committee naturally influenced some votes. He claimed to
+understand thoroughly the merits of the question, from having, in
+his capacity as chairman, heard all the testimony and arguments
+which had come before that committee; and a majority of the
+committee, after due deliberation, had reported against the
+proposed bill.
+
+Mr. Barnum arose to close the debate. He endeavored to state
+briefly the gist of the whole case. "Only a few years before," he
+said, "the New York and New Haven Company had fixed their own
+price for commuters' tickets along the whole line of the road,
+and had thus induced hundreds of New York citizens to remove to
+Connecticut with their families, and build their houses on
+heretofore unimproved property, thus vastly increasing the value
+of the lands, and correspondingly helping our receipts for taxes.
+He urged that there was a tacit understanding between the
+railroad and these commuters and the public generally, that such
+persons as chose thus to remove from a neighboring State, and
+bring their families and capital within Connecticut's borders,
+should have the right to pass over the railroad on the terms
+fixed at the time by the president and directors; 'that any claim
+that the railroad could not afford to commute at the prices they
+had themselves established was absurd, from the fact that, even
+now, if one thousand families who reside in New York, and had
+never been in our own State, should propose to the railroad to
+remove these families (embracing in the aggregate five thousand
+persons) to Connecticut, and build one thousand new houses on the
+line of the New York and New Haven Railroad, provided the
+railroad would carry the male head of the family at all times for
+nothing, the company could well afford to accept the proposition,
+because they would receive full prices for transporting all other
+members of these families, at all times, as well as full prices
+for all their visitors and servants.'
+
+"And now," he said, "what are the facts? Do we desire the
+railroad to carry even one-fifth of these new-comers for nothing?
+Do we, indeed, desire to compel them to transport them for any
+definitely fixed price at all? On the contrary, we find that
+during the late rebellion, when gold was selling for two dollars
+and eighty cents per dollar, this company doubled its prices of
+commutation, and retains the same prices now, although gold is
+but one-half that amount ($1.40). We don't ask them to go back to
+their former prices; we don't compel them to rest even here; we
+simply say, increase your rates, pile up your demands just as
+high as you desire, only you shall not make fish of one and fowl
+of another. You have fixed and increased your prices to
+passengers of all classes just as you liked, and established your
+own ratio between those who pay by the year and those who pay by
+the single trip; and now, all we ask is, that you shall not
+change the ratio. Charge ten dollars per passenger from New York
+to New Haven, if you have the courage to risk the competition of
+the steamboats; and whatever percentage you choose to increase
+the fare of transient passengers, we permit you to increase the
+rates of commuters in the same ratio.
+
+"The interests of the State, as well as communities, demand this
+law; for if it is once fixed by statute that the prices of
+commutation are not to be increased, many persons will leave the
+localities where extortion is permitted on the railroads, and
+will settle in our State. But these railroad gentlemen say they
+have no intention to increase their rates of commutation, and
+they deprecate what they term 'premature legislation,' and an
+uncalled-for meddling with their affairs. Mr. Speaker, 'an ounce
+of prevention is worth a pound of cure.' Men engaged in plots
+against public interests always ask to be 'let alone.' Jeff Davis
+only asked to be 'let alone,' when the North was raising great
+armies to prevent the dissolution of the Union. The people cannot
+afford to let these railroads alone. This hall, crowded with
+railroad lobbyists, as the frogs thronged Egypt, is an admonition
+to all honest legislators that it is unsafe to allow the
+monopolies the chance to rivet the chains which already fetter
+the limbs of those whom circumstances place in the power of these
+companies."
+
+At this point in his speech he was interrupted a messenger, who
+placed in his hands a dispatch from his son-in-law in New York,
+marked "Urgent." He opened and read it. It announced that his
+Museum had been totally destroyed by fire. He laid it upon his
+desk, and without the slightest change of manner continued his
+argument, as follows:
+
+"These railroad gentlemen absolutely deny any intention of
+raising the fares of commuters, and profess to think it very hard
+that disinterested and conscientious gentlemen like them should
+be judged by the doings of the Hudson River and Harlem Railroads.
+But now, Mr. Speaker, I am going to expose the duplicity of these
+men. I have had detectives on their track, for men who plot
+against public interest deserve to be watched. I have in my
+pocket positive proofs that they did, and do, intend to spring
+their trap upon the unprotected commuters on the New York and New
+Haven Railroad."
+
+He then drew from his pocket and read two telegrams received that
+morning, one from New York and the other from Bridgeport,
+announcing that the New York and New Haven Railroad Directory had
+held a secret meeting in New York the day before, for the purpose
+of immediately raising the fares of commuters twenty per cent.,
+so that in case his bill became a law they could get ahead of
+him. He continued:
+
+"Now, Mr. Speaker, I know that these dispatches are true; my
+information is from the inside of the camp. I see a director of
+the New York and New Haven Railroad sitting in this hall; I know
+that he knows these dispatches are true; and if he will go before
+the railroad committee and make oath that he don't know that such
+a meeting took place yesterday, for exactly this purpose, I will
+forfeit and pay one thousand dollars to the families of poor
+soldiers in this city. In consideration of this attempt to
+forestall the action of this Legislature, I offer an amendment to
+the bill now under consideration, by adding after the word
+'ratio' the words 'as it existed on the 1st day of July, 1865.'
+In this way we shall cut off any action which these sleek
+gentlemen may have taken yesterday. It is now evident that these
+railroad gentlemen have set a trap for this Legislature; and I
+propose that we now spring the trap, and see if we cannot catch
+these wily railroad directors in it. Mr. Speaker, I move the
+previous question."
+
+This revelation astounded the opposition, and the "previous
+question" was ordered. On the final vote the bill was carried
+through triumphantly, and has ever since remained an important
+item in the statute-book of the State.
+
+In the spring of 1866 Barnum was re-elected to represent the town
+of Fairfield in the Legislature. He had not intended to serve
+again. But one of the directors of the railroad, who had led the
+opposition to Barnum's new railroad law, had openly boasted about
+the town that Barnum should not be allowed to hold the office
+again. It was in response to these boasts that Barnum decided to
+accept the nomination, and he was handsomely elected.
+
+The leading issue before that Legislature was the election of a
+United States Senator. Andrew Johnson was then President of the
+United States, and had begun to break away from the Republican
+party. One of the Connecticut Senators was following him in this
+action. The other Senator was now a candidate for re-election.
+Barnum had been an earnest admirer of him, but now ascertained
+that he too was siding with Johnson. This caused Barnum to take
+an active part in opposing him, and the showman-legislator spent
+many days and nights endeavoring to impress upon his colleagues
+the importance of defeating this candidate and electing the Hon.
+O. S. Ferry to the Senatorship.
+
+Excitement ran high. At first Mr. Ferry had only a few votes. But
+under Barnum's skilful leadership he at last obtained a majority
+in the party caucus and was accordingly elected.
+
+During that summer Barnum entertained many eminent politicians
+and other public men at his beautiful residence, Lindencroft.
+Governor Hawley wanted him to serve as a Commissioner to the
+Paris Exposition of 1867, but he was unable to do so.
+
+In the spring of 1867 he was nominated for Congress by the
+Republicans of the Fourth District. In referring to this episode,
+he afterward remarked: "Politics were always distasteful to me. I
+possessed, naturally, too much independence of mind, and too
+strong a determination to do what I believe to be right,
+regardless of party expediency, to make a lithe and oily
+politician. To be called on to favor applications from
+office-seekers, without regard to their merits, and to do the
+dirty work too often demanded by political parties; to be "all
+things to all men," though not in the apostolic sense; to shake
+hands with those whom I despised, and to kiss the dirty babies of
+those whose votes were courted, were political requirements which
+I felt I could never acceptably fulfil. Nevertheless, I had
+become, so far as business was concerned, almost a man of
+leisure; and some of my warmest personal friends insisted that a
+nomination to so high and honorable a position as a member of
+Congress was not to be lightly rejected, and so I consented to
+run. Fairfield and Litchfield counties composed the district,
+which, in the preceding Congressional election, in 1865, and just
+after the close of the war, was Republican. In the year
+following, however, the district in the State election went
+Democratic. I had this Democratic majority to contend against in
+1867, and as the whole State turned over and elected the
+Democratic ticket, I lost my election. In the next succeeding
+Congressional election, in 1869, the Fourth District also elected
+the only Democratic Congressman chosen from Connecticut that
+year.
+
+"I was neither disappointed nor cast down by my defeat. The
+political canvass served the purpose of giving me a new
+sensation, and introducing me to new phases of human nature--a
+subject which I had always great delight in studying. The filth
+and scandal, the slanders and vindictiveness, the plottings and
+fawnings, the fidelity, meanness and manliness,: which by turns
+exhibited themselves in the exciting scenes preceding the
+election, were novel to me, and were so far interesting.
+
+"Shortly after my opponent was nominated I sent him the following
+letter, which was also published in the Bridgeport Standard:
+
+" 'BRIDGEPORT, Conn., February 21, 1867.
+" 'W. H. BARNUM, Esq., Salisbury, Conn.:
+
+" 'Dear Sir: Observing that the Democratic party has nominated
+you for Congress from this district, I desire to make you a
+proposition.
+
+" 'The citizens of this portion of our State will be compelled,
+on the first Monday in April next, to decide whether you or
+myself shall represent their interests and their principles in
+the Fortieth Congress of the United States.
+
+" 'The theory of our government is, that the will of the people
+shall be the law of the land. It is important, therefore, that
+the people shall vote understandingly, and especially at this
+important crisis in our national existence. In order that the
+voters of this district shall fully comprehend the principles by
+which each of their Congressional candidates is guided, I
+respectfully invite you to meet me in a serious and candid
+discussion of the important political issues of the day at
+various towns in the Fourth Congressional District of
+Connecticut, on each week-day evening, from the fourth day of
+March until the thirtieth day of the same month, both inclusive.
+
+" 'If you will consent to thus meet me in a friendly discussion
+of those subjects, now so near and dear to every American heart,
+and, I may add, possessing at this time such momentous interest
+to all civilized nations in the world who are suffering from
+misrule, I pledge myself to conduct my portion of the debate with
+perfect fairness, and with all due respect for my opponent, and
+doubt not you will do the same.
+
+" 'Never, in my judgment, in our past history as a nation, have
+interests and questions more important appealed to the people for
+their wise and careful consideration. It is due to the voters of
+the Fourth Congressional District that they have an early and
+full opportunity to examine their candidates in regard to these
+important problems, and I shall esteem it a great privilege if
+you will accept this proposition.
+
+" 'Please favor me with an early answer, and oblige
+                                        " 'Truly yours,
+                                             " 'P. T. BARNUM.' "
+
+To this letter Mr. William H. Barnum replied, positively
+declining to accept his rival's proposition.
+
+When Congress met P. T. Barnum was surprised to see in the
+newspapers an announcement that the seat of his successful rival
+was to be contested on the ground of bribery and fraud. " This,"
+he said, "was the first intimation that I had ever received of
+such an intention, and I was never, at any time before or
+afterwards, consulted upon the subject. The movement proved to
+have originated with neighbors and townsmen of the successful
+candidate, who claimed to be able to prove that he had paid large
+sums of money to purchase votes. They also claimed that they had
+proof that men were brought from an adjoining State to vote, and
+that in the office of the successful candidate naturalization
+papers were forged to enable foreigners to vote upon them. But, I
+repeat, I took no part nor lot in the matter, but concluded that
+if I had been defeated by fraud, mine was the real success.' "
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XXXIX. FIGHTING A NEWSPAPER
+
+DISPOSING OF THE LEASE OF THE MUSEUM SITE--THE BARGAIN WITH MR.
+BENNETT--BARNUM'S REFUSAL TO BACK OUT--A LONG AND BITTER WAR WITH
+"THE HERALD"--ACTION OF THE OTHER MANAGERS--THE RETURN OF PEACE.
+
+After the destruction of his museum by fire, Barnum determined to
+open another and still finer establishment. It would not be on
+the old site, however, but further up town. The unexpired lease
+of the two lots at Ann Street and Broadway he proposed to sell;
+and he quickly had numerous offers for it. This lease still had
+about eleven years to run, and the annual rental was only
+$10,000; and there was a provision that, in case of the burning
+of the building, the owner was to spend $24,000 in aiding Barnum
+to rebuild, and then, at the expiration of the lease, was to pay
+Barnum the appraised value of the building, not exceeding
+$100,000. This lease had seemed extravagant when Barnum had made
+it, but the great growth of the city had so increased the value
+of property in that vicinity, that now the rental of $10,000
+seemed ridiculously small. An experienced real estate broker,
+whom Barnum engaged for the purpose, estimated the value of the
+lease at $275,000. Barnum was so anxious, however, to get the
+matter settled at once that he decided to offer the lease for
+sale at $225,000.
+
+The next day he met James Gordon Bennett, the elder, the owner of
+the New York Herald. Mr. Bennett told him that he thought of
+buying both the lease and the fee simple of the property itself,
+and erecting there a fine building for his great newspaper.
+Barnum therefore, offered him the lease for $200,000, and after a
+few day's consideration Mr. Bennett accepted the offer. His
+attorney thereupon handed to Mr. Barnum a check on the Chemical
+Bank for $200,000, which Barnum immediately used in the purchase
+of Government Bonds. Mr. Bennett had agreed to purchase the fee
+of the property for $500,000. He had been informed that the
+property was worth some $300,000 to $400,000, and he did not mind
+paying $100,000 extra for the purpose of carrying out his plans.
+But the parties who estimated for him the value of the land knew
+nothing of the fact that there was a lease upon the property,
+else of course they would in their estimate have deducted the
+$200,000, which the lease would cost. When, therefore, Mr.
+Bennett saw it stated in the newspapers that the sum which he had
+paid for a piece of land measuring only fifty-six by one hundred
+feet was more than was ever paid before in any city in the world
+for a tract of that size, he discovered the serious oversight
+which he had made; and the owner of the property was immediately
+informed that Bennett would not take it. But Bennett had already
+signed a bond to the owner, agreeing to pay $100,000 cash, and to
+mortgage the premises for the remaining $400,000.
+
+Supposing that by this step he had shaken off the owner of the
+fee, Bennett was not long in seeing that, as he was not to own
+the land, he would have no possible use for the lease, for which
+he had paid the $200,000; and accordingly his next step was to
+shake Barnum off also, and get back the money he had paid him.
+
+In speaking of what followed, Mr. Barnum afterwards said: "My
+business for many years, as manager of the Museum and other
+public entertainments, compelled me to court notoriety; and I
+always found Bennett's abuse far more remunerative than his
+praise, even if I could have had the praise at the same price,
+that is for nothing. Especially was it profitable to me when I
+could be the subject of scores of lines of his scolding
+editorials free of charge, instead of paying him forty cents a
+line for advertisements, which would not attract a tenth part so
+much attention. Bennett had tried abusing me, off and on, for
+twenty years, on one occasion refusing my advertisement
+altogether for the space of about a year; but I always managed to
+be the gainer by his course. Now, however, when new difficulties
+threatened, all the leading managers in New York were members of
+the 'Managers' Association,' and as we all submitted to the
+arbitrary and extortionate demands of the Herald, Bennett thought
+he had but to crack his whip, in order to keep all and any of us
+within the traces. Accordingly one day Bennett's attorney wrote
+me a letter, saying that he would like to have me call on him at
+his office the following morning. Not dreaming of the object, I
+called as desired, and after a few pleasant commonplace remarks
+about the weather, and other trifles, the attorney said:
+
+" 'Mr. Barnum, I have sent for you to say that Mr. Bennett has
+concluded not to purchase the museum lots, and therefore that you
+had better take back the lease, and return the $200,000 paid for
+it.'
+
+" 'Are you in earnest?' I asked with surprise.
+
+" 'Certainly, quite so,' he answered.
+
+" 'Really,' I said, smiling, 'I am sorry I can't accommodate Mr.
+Bennett; I have not got the little sum about me; in fact, I have
+spent the money.'
+
+" 'It will be better for you to take back the lease,' said the
+attorney, seriously.
+
+" 'Nonsense,' I replied, 'I shall do nothing of the sort; I don't
+make child's bargains. The lease was cheap enough, but I have
+other business to attend to, and shall have nothing to do with
+it.'
+
+"The attorney said very little in reply; but I could see, by the
+almost benignant sorrow expressed upon his countenance, that he
+evidently pitied me for the temerity that would doubtless lead me
+into the jaws of the insatiable monster of the Herald. The next
+morning I observed that the advertisement of my entertainments
+with my museum company at Winter Garden was left out of the
+Herald columns. I went directly to the editorial rooms of the
+Herald; and learning that Bennett was not in, I said to Mr.
+Hudson, then managing editor:
+
+" 'My advertisement is left out of the Herald; is there a screw
+loose?'
+
+" 'I believe there is,' was the reply.
+
+" 'What is the matter?' I asked.
+
+" 'You must ask the Emperor,' said Mr. Hudson, meaning of course
+Bennett.
+
+" 'When will the "Emperor" be in?' I inquired. 'Next Monday,' was
+the answer.
+
+" 'Well, I shall not see him,' I replied; 'but I wish to have
+this thing settled at once. Mr. Hudson, I now tender you the
+money for the insertion of my museum advertisement on the same
+terms as are paid by other places of amusement; will you publish
+it?'
+
+" 'I will not,' Mr. Hudson peremptorily replied.
+
+" 'That is all,' I said. Mr. Hudson then smilingly and blandly
+remarked, 'I have formally answered your formal demand, because I
+suppose you require it; but you know, Mr. Barnum, I can only obey
+orders.' I assured him that I understood the matter perfectly,
+and attached no blame to him in the premises. I then proceeded to
+notify the secretary of the 'Managers' Association' to call the
+managers together at twelve o'clock the following day; and there
+was a full meeting at the appointed time. I stated the facts in
+the case in the Herald affair, and simply remarked, that if we
+did not make common cause against any newspaper publisher who
+excluded an advertisement from his columns simply to gratify a
+private pique, it was evident that either and all of us were
+liable to imposition at any time.
+
+"One of the managers immediately made a motion that the entire
+Association should stop their advertising and bill printing at
+the Herald office, and have no further connection with that
+establishment. Mr. Lester Wallack advised that this motion should
+not be adopted until a committee had waited upon Bennett, and had
+reported the result of the interview to the Association.
+Accordingly, Messrs. Wallack, Wheatley and Stuart were delegated
+to go, down to the Herald office to call on Mr. Bennett.
+
+"The moment Bennett saw them, he evidently suspected the object
+of their mission, for he at once commenced to speak to Mr.
+Wallack in a patronizing manner; told him how long he had known,
+and how much he respected his late father, who was a true English
+gentleman of the old school,' with much more in the same strain.
+Mr. Wallack replied to Bennett that the three managers were
+appointed a committee to wait upon him to ascertain if he
+insisted upon excluding from his columns the museum
+advertisements--not on account of any objection to the contents
+of the advertisements, or to the museum itself, but simply
+because he had a private business disagreement with the
+proprietor; intimating that such a proceeding, for such a reason,
+and no other, might lead to a rupture of business relations with
+other managers. In reply, Mr. Bennett had something to say about
+the fox that had suffered tailwise from a trap, and thereupon
+advised all other foxes to cut their tails off; and he pointed
+the fable by setting forth the impolicy of drawing down upon the
+Association the vengeance of the Herald. The committee, however,
+coolly insisted upon a direct answer to their question.
+
+"Bennett then answered: 'I will not publish Barnum's
+advertisement; I do my business as I please, and in my own way.'
+
+" 'So do we,' replied one of the managers, and the committee
+withdrew.
+
+"The next day the Managers' Association met, heard the report,
+and unanimously resolved to withdraw their advertisements from
+the Herald, and their patronage from the Herald job
+establishment, and it was done. Nevertheless, the Herald for
+several days continued to print gratutitously the advertisements
+of Wallack's Theatre and Niblo's Garden, and inordinately puffed
+these establishments, evidently in order to ease the fall, and to
+convey the idea that some of the theatres patronized the Herald,
+and perhaps hoping by praising these managers to draw them back
+again, and so to nullify the agreement of the Association in
+regard to the Herald. Thereupon, the mangers headed their
+advertisements in all the other New York papers with the line,
+'This establishment does not advertise in the New York Herald,'
+and for many months this announcement was kept at the top of
+every theatrical advertisement and on the posters and playbills.
+
+"The Herald then began to abuse and villify the theatrical and
+opera managers, their artists and their performances, which, of
+course, was well understood by the public, and relished
+accordingly. Meanwhile the theatres prospered amazingly. Their
+receipts were never larger, and their houses never more thronged.
+The public took sides in the matter with the managers and against
+the Herald, and thousands of people went to the theatres merely
+to show their willingness to support the managers and to spite
+'Old Bennett.' The editor was fairly caught in his own trap.
+Other journals began to estimate the loss the Herald sustained by
+the action of the managers, and it was generally believed that
+this loss in advertising and job printing was not less than from
+$75,000 to $100,000 a year. The Herald's circulation also
+suffered terribly, since hundreds of people, at the hotels and
+elsewhere, who were accustomed to buy the paper solely for the
+sake of seeing what amusements were announced for the evening,
+now bought other papers. This was the hardest blow of all, and it
+fully accounted for the abuse which the Herald daily poured out
+upon the theatres.
+
+"Bennett evidently felt ashamed of the whole transaction. He
+would never publish the facts in his columns, though he once
+stated in an editorial that it had been reported that he had been
+cheated in purchasing the Broadway property; that the case had
+gone to court, and the public would soon know all the
+particulars. Some persons supposed by this that Bennett had sued
+me; but this was far from being the case. The owner of the lots
+sued Bennett, to compel him to take the title and pay for the
+property as per agreement; and that was all the 'law' there was
+about it. He held James Gordon Bennett's bond, that he would pay
+him half a million of dollars for the land, as follows: $100,000
+cash, and a bond and mortgage upon the premises for the remaining
+$400,000. The day before the suit was to come to trial, Bennett
+came forward, took the deed, and paid $100,000 cash, and gave a
+bond and mortgage of the entire premises for $400,000.
+
+"Had I really taken back the lease, as Bennett desired, he would
+have been in a worse scrape than ever; for having been compelled
+to take the property, he would have been obliged, as my landlord,
+to go on and assist in building a Museum for me, according to the
+terms of my lease, and a Museum I should certainly have built on
+Bennett's property, even if I had owned a dozen Museums up town.
+
+"In the autumn of 1868, the associated managers came to the
+conclusion that the punishment of Bennett for two years was
+sufficient, and they consented to restore their advertisements to
+the Herald. I was then carrying on my new Museum, and although I
+did not immediately resume advertising in the Herald, I have
+since done so."
+
+Such is the account Barnum gave, in his own words, of this
+extraordinary quarrel. He was, it will be seen, unsparing of
+criticism and denunciation. Kindly as was his nature, he was "a
+good hater," and never was there a more relentless fighter. In
+denouncing Mr. Bennett he was perfectly sincere, and believed
+himself to be entirely in the right. At the same time he never
+hesitated to give a full meed of appreciative praise to the great
+journalist, for his extraordinary enterprise and commanding
+talents. Both the men are now dead, after careers of marvellous
+success, and the animosity that raged between them is also long
+dead; it perished years before they did. It is here rehearsed
+merely as an integral and essential part of this biography, to be
+regarded in a spirit of philosophic contemplation, entirely
+devoid of bitterness or acrimony,
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XL. BRIDGEPORT.
+
+THE FIGHT FOR THE ESTABLISHMENT OF SEASIDE PARK--LAYING OUT CITY
+STREETS IMPATIENCE WITH "OLD FOGIES"--BUILDING A SEASIDE
+HOME--WALDEMERE--A HOME IN NEW YORK CITY.
+
+A remarkable feature of Mr. Barnum's life was his loyalty to the
+place he had chosen as his home, and his devotion to its
+interests. He had great faith in Bridgeport, and worked
+unceasingly to justify it. He looked far ahead, saw the
+prospective growth of the place, and laid broad plans of
+preparation for the future.
+
+Apart from his great services in laying out East Bridgeport, he
+was the author of the improvements on the water-front known as
+Seaside Park. The idea of such a thing occurred to him first in
+1863, when he rode over the ground and observed its fitness for
+the purpose. He then began agitating the matter, and urging the
+immediate acquirement by the city of land for a park and public
+drive-way along the margin of the Sound. It was necessary, he
+represented, to do it at once, before the natural increase in the
+value of the land made such an undertaking too expensive. That it
+would be a profitable venture he felt certain; for such an
+improvement would make every bit of real estate in the city more
+valuable, and would attract many new residents to the place.
+
+There were, however, many conservatives, "old fogies" he called
+them, who opposed him. He then approached the farmers who owned
+the land lying immediately upon the shore, and tried to convince
+them that, if they would give the city, free, a deep slip next to
+the water, to be used as a public park, it would increase in
+value the rest of their land so much as to make it a profitable
+operation for them. But it was like beating against the wind.
+They were "not so stupid as to think that they could become
+gainers by giving away their property."
+
+He succeeded, however, in getting the active aid and co-operation
+of Messrs. Nathaniel Wheeler, James Loomis, Francis Ives,
+Frederick Wood, and some others, who went with him to the
+landowners and added their persuasions to his. After much urging,
+they finally got the terms upon which the proprietors would give
+a portion and sell another portion of their land, which fronted
+on the water, provided the land thus disposed of should forever
+be appropriated to the purposes of a public park. But,
+unfortunately, a part of the land it was desirable to include was
+a farm, of some thirty acres, then belonging to an unsettled
+estate, and neither the administrator nor the heirs could or
+would give away a rod of it. But the whole farm was for
+sale--and, to overcome the difficulty in the way of its transfer
+for the public benefit, Barnum bought it for about $12,000, and
+then presented the required front to the park. He did not want
+this land or any portion of it, for his own purposes or profit,
+and he offered a thousand dollars to any one who would take his
+place in the transaction; but no one accepted, and he was quite
+willing to contribute so much of the land as was needed for so
+noble an object. Besides this, he gave $1,400 toward purchasing
+other land and improving the park, and, after months of
+persistent personal effort, he succeeded in raising, by private
+subscription, the sum necessary to secure the land needed. This
+was duly paid for, deeded to, and accepted by the city, and
+Barnum had the pleasure of naming this new and great public
+improvement, "Seaside Park."
+
+When Mr. Barnum first selected Bridgeport as his home, as already
+stated in a preceding chapter, the place was commended to him by
+its nearness to New York, its convenience of access, and the
+beauty of its situation. "Nowhere," said he, "in all my travels
+in America and abroad had I seen a city whose very position
+presented so many and varied attractions. Situated on Long Island
+Sound, with that vast water-view in front, and on every other
+side a beautiful and fertile country with every variety of inland
+scenery, and charming drives which led through valleys rich with
+well-cultivated farms, and over hills thick-wooded with
+far-stretching forests of primeval growth--all these natural
+attractions appeared to me only so many aids to the advancement
+the beautiful and busy city might attain, if public spirit,
+enterprise, and money grasped and improved the opportunities the
+locality itself extended. I saw that what Nature had so freely
+lavished must be supplemented by yet more liberal Art."
+
+It was in pursuance of this object that he built the famous
+Iranistan; and when he did so he felt confident that this superb
+place would so increase the value of surrounding property that
+none but first-class residences would be erected in the vicinity.
+He, however, went on to improve the surrounding property as much
+as possible. He opened numerous fine avenues through land
+purchased by himself, and freely gave them to the city. In this
+way he opened miles of new streets and planted them with
+thousands of shade trees. The planting of trees was almost a
+mania with him, in pursuit of the doctrine laid down in Scott's
+"Heart of Mid-Lothian": "When ye hae naething else to do, ye may
+be aye sticking in a tree; it will be growing when ye're
+sleeping."
+
+Barnum was always for enterprise and progress. "Conservatism," he
+said, "may be a good thing in the State, or in the Church, but it
+is fatal to the growth of cities, and the conservative notions of
+old fogies make them indifferent to the requirements which a very
+few years in the future will compel, and blind to their own best
+interests. Such men never look beyond the length of their noses,
+and consider every investment a dead loss unless they can get the
+sixpence profit into their pockets before they go to bed. My own
+long training and experience as a manager impelled me to carry
+into such private enterprises as the purchase of real estate that
+best and most essential managerial quality of instantly deciding,
+not only whether a venture was worth undertaking, but what, all
+things considered, that venture would result in. Almost any man
+can see how a thing will begin, but not every man is gifted with
+the foresight to see how it will end, or how, with the proper
+effort, it may be made to end. In East Bridgeport where we had no
+'conservatives' to contend with, we were only a few years in
+turning almost tenantless farms into a populous and prosperous
+city. On the other side of the river, while the opening of new
+avenues, the planting of shade trees, and the building of many
+houses, have afforded me the highest pleasures of my life, I
+confess that not a few of my greatest annoyance's have been
+occasioned by the opposition of those who seem to be content to
+simply vegetate through their existence, and who looked upon me
+as a restless, reckless innovator, because I was trying to remove
+the moss from everything around them, and even from their own
+eyes."
+
+Mrs. Barnum's health continued to decline, and in the summer of
+1867 her doctor commended her to live on the seashore.
+Accordingly her husband sold Lindencroft, and they removed for
+the summer to a small farm-house adjoining Seaside Park. So
+delighted were they with life by the water during the hot days of
+the summer that they determined thereafter to spend every summer
+on the very shore of Long Island Sound. Finding it impossible to
+prepare a house of their own in time for the next season, they
+spent the summer of 1868 in a new and handsome house which Mr.
+Barnum owned but which he had built for sale. In the fall of
+1868, however, he purchased a large and beautiful grove of
+hickory trees adjoining Seaside Park, and decided to build a
+permanent residence there.
+
+But there was a vast deal to do in grading and preparing the
+ground, in opening new streets and avenues as approaches to the
+property, and in setting out trees near the proposed site of the
+house; so that ground was not broken for the foundation till
+October. He planned a house which should combine the greatest
+convenience with the highest comfort, keeping in mind always that
+houses were made to live in as well as to look at, and to be
+"homes" rather than mere residences. So the house was made to
+include abundant room for guests, with dressing-rooms and baths
+to every chamber; water from the city throughout the premises;
+gas manufactured on the ground; and that greatest of all
+comforts, a semi-detached kitchen, so that the smell as well as
+the secrets of the cuisine might be confined to its own locality.
+The stables and gardens were located far from the mansion, on the
+opposite side of one of the newly-opened avenues, so that in the
+immediate vicinity of the house, on either side and before both
+fronts, stretched large lawns, broken only by the grove, single
+shade-trees, rock-work, walks, flower-beds, and drives. The whole
+scheme as planned was faithfully carried out in less than eight
+months The first foundation stone was laid in October, 1868; and
+they moved into the completed house in June following, in 1869.
+
+On taking possession of this new residence, Barnum formally named
+it "Waldemere." Literally this name was "Wald-am-Meer," or
+"Woods-by-the Sea," but Barnum preferred the more euphonious
+form. On the same estate he built at the same time two beautiful
+cottages, called "Petrel's Nest," and "Wavewood," the homes of
+his two daughters, Mrs. Thompson and Mrs. Seeley--the latter his
+youngest. Here Barnum decided to speed five months of every year,
+and for his home during the other seven months he purchased a
+splendid mansion on Murray Hill, in New York City, at the corner
+of Fifth Avenue and 38th Street.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XLI. HONORS AND ADULATIONS.
+
+SECOND MARRIAGE--THE KING OF HAWAII--ELECTED MAYOR OF
+BRIDGEPORT--SUCCESSFUL TOUR OF THE HIPPODROME--BARNUM'S
+RETIREMENT FROM OFFICE.
+
+In the autumn of 1874 Mr. Barnum married the daughter of his old
+English friend, John Fish. The wedding took place in the Church
+of the Divine Paternity, Fifth Avenue, New York, and after a
+brief bridal tour, they returned to Waldemere.
+
+In December, 1874, David Kalakau, King of the Sandwich Islands,
+visited New York, and with his suite was invited to attend the
+Hippodrome.
+
+During the performance Barnum sat beside the King, who kept up a
+pleasant conversation with him for two hours. The King expressed
+himself as highly delighted with the entertainment, and said he
+was always fond of horses and racing.
+
+Some twelve thousand spectators were present, and before the
+exhibition was finished they began to call loudly "The King! The
+King!"
+
+Turning to his host, Kalakau inquired the meaning of their
+excitement. "Your Majesty," replied Barnum, "this vast audience
+wishes to give you an ovation. The building is so large that they
+cannot distinguish your Majesty from every part of the house, and
+are anxious that you should ride around the circle in order that
+they may greet you."
+
+At the moment, Barnum's open barouche was driven into the circle
+and approached the royal box.
+
+"No doubt your Majesty would greatly gratify my countrymen, if
+you would kindly step into this carriage and ride around the
+circle."
+
+The King immediately arose, and amidst tremendous cheering,
+stepped into the carriage. Barnum took a seat by his side, and
+the King smilingly remarked, "We are all actors."
+
+The audience rose to their feet, cheered and waved their
+handkerchiefs, as the King rode around the circle, raising his
+hat and bowing. The excitement was simply tremendous.
+
+In March, 1875, the nomination for Mayor of Bridgeport was
+offered Barnum, but he refused it, until assured that the
+nomination was intended as a compliment, and that both parties
+would sustain it. Politically the city is largely Democratic, but
+Barnum led the Republican ticket, and was easily elected.
+
+His Inaugural address before the new Common Council, April 12, is
+given below.
+
+GENTLEMEN OF THE COMMON COUNCIL:--Intrusted as we are, by the
+votes of our fellow-citizens, with the care and management of
+their interests, it behooves us to endeavor to merit the
+confidence reposed in us. We are sometimes called the "fathers of
+the city." Certainly our duty is, and our pleasure should be, to
+administer the municipal government as a good and wise father
+conducts his household, caring for all, partial to none. No
+personal feelings should dictate our official acts. We are not
+placed here to gratify personal or party resentment, nor to
+extend personal or party favor in any manner that may in the
+remotest degree conflict with the best interests of our city. As
+citizens we enjoy a great common interest. Each individual is a
+member of the body corporate, and no member can be unduly favored
+or unjustly oppressed without injury to the entire community. No
+person or party can afford to be dishonest. Honesty is always the
+best policy, for "with what measure ye mete it shall be measured
+to you again."
+
+A large portion of this honorable body are now serving officially
+for the first time, and therefore may not be fully acquainted
+with the details of its workings; but we are all acquainted with
+the great principles of Justice and Right. If we fail to work
+according to these eternal principles, we betray the confidence
+placed in us, and this our year of administration will be
+remembered with disapprobation and contempt.
+
+Let us bring to our duties careful judgment and comprehensive
+views with regard to expenditure, so that we may be neither
+parsimonious nor extravagant, but, like a prudent householder,
+ever careful that expenses shall be less than the income.
+
+Our city is peculiarly adapted for commercial purposes, it should
+be our care, therefore, to adopt such measures as tend to promote
+trade, manufactures and commerce. Its delightful and healthy
+locality makes it also a desirable place of residence. We should
+strive to enhance its natural beauty, to improve our streets and,
+with moderate expenditure, to embellish our parks, by which means
+we shall attract refined and wealthy residents.
+
+As conservators of the public peace and morals it is our duty to
+prevent, so far as possible, acts which disturb one or the other,
+and to enforce the laws in an impartial and parental spirit.
+
+The last report of our Chief of Police says: " 'Tis a sad and
+painful duty, yet candor compels us to state that at least ninety
+per cent. of the causes of all the arrests during the year are
+directly traceable to the immoderate use of intoxicating liquors,
+not to speak of the poverty and misery it has caused families
+which almost daily come under our observation."
+
+In the town of Vineland, N. J., where no intoxicating drinks are
+sold, the overseer of the poor stated in his annual report that
+in a population of 10,000 there was but one indictment in six
+months, and that the entire police expenses were but seventy-five
+dollars per year--the sum paid to him--and the poor expenses a
+mere trifle. He further says: "We practically have no debt, and
+our taxes are only one per cent. on the valuation. "Similar
+results are reported in the town of Greeley, Colorado, where no
+liquors are sold.
+
+Our laws license the sale of intoxicating drinks under certain
+restrictions on week days, but no man can claim the right under
+such license to cause mobs, riots, bloodshed or murder. Hence no
+man has, or can have, any right by license or otherwise to
+dispense liquors to intoxicated persons, nor to furnish
+sufficient liquor to cause intoxication. Our duty is therefore to
+see that the police aid in regulating to the extent of their
+legal power a traffic which our laws do not wholly prohibit.
+Spirituous liquors of the present day are so much adulterated and
+doubly poisoned that their use fires the brain and drives their
+victims to madness, violence and murder. The money annually
+expended for intoxicating drinks, and the cost of their evil
+results in Bridgeport, or any other American city where liquor
+selling is licensed, would pay the entire expenses of the city
+(if liquors were not drank), including the public schools, give a
+good suit of clothes to every poor person of both sexes, a barrel
+of flour to every poor family living within its municipal
+boundaries, and leave a handsome surplus on hand. Our enormous
+expenses for the trial and punishment of criminals, as well as
+for the support of the poor, are mainly caused by this traffic.
+Surely, then, it is our duty to do all we can, legally, to limit
+and mitigate its evil. As no person ever became a drunkard who
+did not sincerely regret that he or she ever tasted intoxicating
+drinks, it is a work of mercy, as well as justice, to do all in
+our power to lessen this leprous hindrance to happiness. We
+should strive to exterminate gambling, prostitution and other
+crimes which have not yet attained to the dignity of a "license."
+
+The public health demands that we should pay attention to
+necessary drainage, and prevent the sale of adulterated food. The
+invigorating breezes from Long Island Sound, and the absence of
+miasmatic marshes serve to make ours one of the most healthy
+cities in America. Scientific experiments made daily during the
+whole of last year have established the fact that our atmosphere
+is impregnated with OZONE, or concentrated oxygen, to an extent
+not hitherto discovered on this continent. No city of the same
+size in America is so extensively known throughout our own land
+and in Europe as Bridgeport. It should be our pleasure to
+strengthen all natural advantages which we possess as a city by
+maintaining a government of corresponding excellence.
+
+It is painful to the industrious and moral portions of our people
+to see so many loungers about the streets, and such a multitude
+whose highest aspirations seem to be to waste their time in
+idleness, or at base ball, billiards, etc.
+
+No person needs to be unemployed who is not over fastidious about
+the kind of occupation. There are too many soft hands (and heads)
+waiting for light work and heavy pay. Better work for half a loaf
+than beg or steal a whole one. Mother earth is always near by,
+and ready to respond to reasonable drafts on her never-failing
+treasury. A patch of potatoes raised "on shares" is preferable to
+a poulticed pate earned in a whisky scrimmage. Some modern
+Micawbers stand with folded hands waiting for the panic to pass,
+as the foolish man waited for the river to run dry and allow him
+to walk over.
+
+The soil is the foundation of American prosperity. When
+multitudes of our consumers become producers; when fashion
+teaches economy, instead of expending for a gaudy dress what
+would comfortably clothe the family; when people learn to walk
+until they can afford to ride; when the poor man ceases to spend
+more for tobacco than for bread; when those who complain of
+panics learn that "we cannot eat our cake and keep it," that a
+sieve will not hold water, that we must rely on our own exertions
+and earn before we expend, then will panics cease and prosperity
+return. While we should by no means unreasonably restrict healthy
+recreation, we should remember that "time is money," that
+idleness leads to immoral habits, and that the peace, prosperity
+and character of a city depend on the intelligence, integrity,
+industry and frugality of its inhabitants.
+
+Frank Leslie's Illustrated Newspaper of July 24th, contained a
+picture entitled "His Honor, P. T. Barnum, Mayor of Bridgeport,
+Presiding at a Meeting of the Common Council of that City." The
+editor's remarks are as follows:--"Mayor Barnum's message was a
+model of brevity and practical thought. Having at the beginning
+of his official career declared war against the whisky dealers,
+he next proceeded to open the struggle. For twenty years the
+saloons had been kept open on Sundays, and it was declared
+impossible to close them. Mr. Barnum has all his life acted upon
+the quaint French aphorism that 'nothing is so possible as the
+impossible.' He gave notice that the saloons must be closed. A
+select committee of citizens volunteered to aid in collecting
+testimony in case the sellers should disregard the proclamation,
+and leave the latch-string to their back doors displayed on the
+outside. Although the doors were open, the keepers refused to
+sell except to personal friends. The committee-men stood opposite
+the saloons, and took the names of a dozen or so who were
+admitted. The next morning the saloon-keepers were arrested, and
+when they found their 'friends' had been subpoenaed to appear as
+witnesses, they pleaded guilty and immediately brought out their
+pocket-books to pay the judicial 'shot.' This plan effectually
+broke up Sunday traffic in liquor, thus insuring a quiet day for
+the citizens, and greatly accommodating the saloon-keepers, the
+best portion of whom really favor a general closing on Sunday.
+
+"By nature an organizer of men and systems, he is his own best
+executive officer. No one knows so well as he how men may be best
+governed, and no one can so pleasantly polish off the rough sides
+of mankind. Successful beyond the usual measure as an
+intelligent, courteous and considerate showman, he has already
+proved himself the most acceptable of Mayors."
+
+In 1875, the Hippodrome was transported by rail throughout the
+United States, going as far east as Portland, Maine, and west to
+Kansas City, Missouri. Notwithstanding the depressed state of
+finances generally that year, the season was a fairly profitable
+one.
+
+A very painful event in connection with the show, occurred in
+July. The aeronaut, Donaldson, made his customary daily ascension
+from the Hippodrome grounds at Chicago, and was never heard from
+afterward. He took with him Mr. N. S. Grimwood, a reporter of the
+Chicago Journal, whose body was found a few weeks later in Lake
+Michigan. There was a terrible storm the night of the ascension
+and it was doubtless then that the men perished.
+
+About the middle of June Barnum visited Niagara Falls with Mrs.
+Barnum and a party of English friends. Leaving the party at
+Niagara, Mr. and Mrs. Barnum went to Akron, Ohio, where the
+"Travelling World's Fair" was to exhibit. The Mayor of Akron
+called upon them and invited them to a concert, where, in
+response to loud calls, Barnum gave a short speech; they were
+afterward tendered a reception and a serenade at the hotel. The
+next day they were escorted to Buchtel College by the founder of
+the institution, Mr. J. R. Buchtel, and the Reverend D. C.
+Tomlinson. The students received Barnum enthusiastically, and he
+gave them one of his delightful speeches.
+
+Returning to Buffalo, they rejoined their friends, and also met
+the Hippodrome. Early in the morning of the second day of the
+exhibition Barnum despatched a special train to Niagara Falls,
+with some hundreds of the Hippodrome Company, to whom he wished
+to give the pleasure of viewing the cataract. The band which
+accompanied them crossed Suspension Bridge playing "God Save the
+Queen," and "Yankee Doodle," and returned to Buffalo in time for
+the afternoon performance. In July, Barnum visited the Hippodrome
+at St Louis and Chicago, and then returned to Waldemere for the
+rest of the summer.
+
+During the autumn of 1875, under the auspices of the Redpath
+Lyceum Bureau, in Boston, Mr. Barnum found time to deliver some
+thirty times, a lecture on "The World and How to Live in It,"
+going as far east as Thomaston, Maine, and west to Leavenworth,
+Kansas. When the tour was finished the Bureau wrote him that "In
+parting for the season please allow us to say that none of our
+best lecturers have succeeded in delighting our audiences and
+lecture committees so well as yourself."
+
+The National Jubilee year was celebrated by the Hippodrome
+Company in a very patriotic manner. It was said, that they gave
+the people, a Fourth of July celebration every day. The
+establishment traveled in three trains of railroad cars; they
+took along a battery of cannon, and every morning fired a salute
+of thirteen guns. Groups of persons costumed in the style of
+Continental troops, and supplemented with the Goddess of Liberty,
+a live eagle and some good singers, sang patriotic songs,
+accompanied with bands of music, and also with cannon placed
+outside the tents and fired by means of electricity. The
+performance was closed by singing "America," the entire audience
+rising and joining in the chorus. At night there were fireworks
+in which Revolutionary scenes were brilliantly depicted. The
+street parade was a gorgeous feature. It began to move when the
+salute was fired, and the town bells were always rung to aid the
+effect of the National Jubilee.
+
+Barnum's official term as Mayor of Bridgeport, expired April 3,
+1876. Preferring to travel part of the time with his Centennial
+show, he refused a renomination. The last meeting of the Common
+Council under his administration, met March 29.
+
+The New York Daily Graphic, of March 30, read:--"Mr. P. T.
+Barnum, Mayor of Bridgeport, has uttered his valedictory message.
+The document is very much like the man. He disapproves of the
+reports of the Chief of Police and Clerk of the Police
+Commissioners, because they declare that liquor saloons and
+brothels cannot be closed, and he even reproves the latter for
+his 'flippant manner' of dealing with the subject. Barnum must
+have his joke or two, withal, and he can no more subsist without
+his fun than could a former Mayor of this city. He ventures to
+allude in this solemn document to the management of the New York
+and New Haven Railroad Company, as 'the good bishop and his
+directors;' makes a first rate pun on the names of two citizens;
+and says to the Aldermen, 'And now we have, like the Arabs, only
+to 'fold our tents and silently steal away,' congratulating
+ourselves that this is the only stealing which has been performed
+by this honorable body.' Mr. Barnum's administration in
+Bridgeport has been mild, but characterized by firmness and
+independence. His trouble with the Jews was of short duration,
+for he is most respectful toward all theologies. He has not been
+able to carry out his extreme temperance views; but he has made a
+very good Mayor of a city, for whose prosperity he has labored
+for half a lifetime."
+
+It can safely be said that Barnum amused and instructed more
+persons than any men who ever lived. In the course of his career
+as manager of public entertainments, the number of his patrons
+was enormous. Here is his own estimate, in 1889:--"During the
+forty years that I have been a manager of public amusements, the
+number of my patrons has been almost incredible. From a careful
+examination of my account books for the different exhibitions
+which I have owned and controlled, I find that more than
+eighty-two millions of tickets, in the aggregate, were disposed
+of, and numerous exhibitions which I have had at various times
+are not included in this statement."
+
+The traveling exhibitions which I managed during
+the six years preceding my purchase of the New York
+American  Museum, in 1841, were attended by . . . . .  1,500,000
+persons.
+The American Museum which I managed from 1841
+to 1865, when it was destroyed by fire, sold . . . .  37,560,000
+tickets.
+My Broadway Museum, in 1865-6-7 and 8, sold . . . . .  3,640,000
+My Philadelphia Museum, 1849, 1850 and 1851, sold . .  1,800,000
+My Baltimore Museum, sold . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  900,000
+My traveling Asiatic Caravan, Museum and Menagerie,
+in 1851-2-3 and 4, sold   . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .5,824,000
+My great traveling World's Fair and Hippodrome, in
+1871-2-3-4-5 and 6, sold . . . . . . . . . . . . . .   7,920,000
+                                                    ------------
+                                   Carried forward,  59,144,000
+
+My other traveling exhibitions in America and Europe,
+sold  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .    2,200,000
+tickets.
+General Tom Thumb has exhibited for me 34 years,
+and sold . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .    20,400,000
+"
+Jenny Lind's Concerts, under my management, were
+attended by . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .    600,000
+persons
+Catharine Hayes's 60 Concerts in California, under my
+contract, sold . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .     120,000
+tickets.
+             ----------------
+Thus, my patrons amount to the enormous number of     82,464,000
+
+In addition to that, he delivered over seven hundred public
+lectures which were attended in the aggregate by 1,300,000
+persons, and wrote three books of reminiscences. Is it to be
+wondered at, that such a well-known character should receive a
+letter from New Zealand addressed simply, "Mr. Barnum, America"?
+
+
+
+SOME REMINISCENCES OF P. T. BARNUM
+
+ My first recollection of Mr. Barnum goes back to the period of
+my small-boyhood, when he came to the country village near my
+home to lecture upon temperance. I still remember the animation
+of his discourse on that occasion; its humor and its anecdote;
+and, with what absorbing interest the large audience sat out the
+hour and a half or more which the speaker so well filled. In
+describing the drunkard and the illusions which master him, he
+showed a keen perception of human nature; and, in every part of
+his address there was no end of spirited appeal and analysis,
+mingled with unbounded mirth and pathos, as the fluctuating
+argument went on.
+
+A few years later, when I had grown old enough to visit the
+metropolis, I made it one of the chief items of my concern to
+visit the old museum on the corner of Ann Street and Broadway,
+where the Herald Building now stands. There was, even then, no
+curiosity there more impressive than its proprietor, who was the
+very embodiment of life, kindly feeling, and wholesome joy. I
+noticed that he was in all parts of the museum in very rapid
+succession, and that nothing escaped his attention. Something in
+his manner caught every eye. It was said of Daniel Webster that
+when he walked through the streets of London, strangers who met
+him turned around for another look after he passed by. And, I
+confess I yielded in Mr. Barnum's presence, as others did, to
+this same sight-seeing inclination. It was not merely that he was
+so well known, and that his name had gone about the world with
+the circuit of the sun; it was because the force that made this
+thing possible worked also in other ways, and compelled you to
+give its owner attention.
+
+He had a kind word or an entertaining one for everybody who came
+near him, as occasion offered, whether he was an old acquaintance
+or a stranger. The occasion did not come to me, though I remember
+wishing it had, when I left the museum. Probably I should have
+deliberately sought it if I had had more assurance and experience
+at that time; and if I had known, too, that we were afterward to
+meet intimately, and that for more than twenty years the
+latch-string of his different homes, in Bridgeport and New York,
+was to respond so many dozens of times to my touch, for days and
+weeks of remarkable hospitality.
+
+My opportunity for knowing Mr. Barnum personally came about when
+I was, as a young man, conducting, almost single-handed, a
+lecture course in a very small country town in the later sixties,
+soon after the close of the war. The night for Mr. Barnum to come
+to us was a very cold and forbidding one in February. A
+snow-storm, the most formidable one of the winter, sprang up to
+apparently thwart the success of the performance; and so certain
+was Mr. Barnum that nobody would appear to hear him, he offered
+not only to release me from the contract between us, but, in
+addition to that, would pay me the price I was to pay him, or
+more, to be permitted to return to New York. "There is nothing on
+earth I hate to do so much," said he, "as to lecture to empty
+benches."
+
+I said to him: "Please trust me for the avoidance of that. If it
+had been a pleasant night, instead of this howling storm, I would
+have filled the hall and the yard in front to the front gate.
+But, as it now is, I will still guarantee to fill the hall." And
+filled it was, to our equal delight.
+
+Before entering and discovering this fact, I ventured to say to
+Mr. Barnum that, owing to the general untowardness and inclemency
+of the night, I would introduce him in my own way, and not in the
+conventional one, if he did not object. "By all means," said he;
+"if you can awaken any warmth or hilarity on as sorrowful an
+outlook as this, do not spare ME, or hesitate for a moment."
+
+On arriving at our seats on the platform, I arose and said, in
+some such words as these:
+
+"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN:--You will bear me out in saying it has
+been my usual custom to introduce the speaker of the evening in
+the briefest way possible, and not to trouble you with any talk
+of my own. To-night, in view of the storm, and while Mr. Barnum
+is resting for a moment, I will break my rule and tell you a
+story. Some years ago a queer fellow from the country went to New
+York, and, among the sights and experiences he had planned for,
+he went to Barnum's Museum. Mr. Greenwood was then its manager,
+and noticed with some interest his patron's rusticity when he
+called for a ticket. He asked Mr. Greenwood, after having paid
+for the card of admittance, 'Where is Barnum?' As Mr. Barnum
+happened to be in sight on the entrance floor, Mr. Greenwood,
+pointing to him said, There he is.'
+
+"At once the querist started in the direction named. He got very
+near Mr. Barnum and stood looking intently at him. Then he moved
+a little segment in the circle he was describing, and looked
+again. Several times he repeated these inspections, until he had
+from all points viewed the object of his curiosity and had
+completed the circle, when he started for the door, Mr. Greenwood
+watching him all the time. When he came near enough Mr. Greenwood
+said to him: 'My friend, you have not seen the Museum yet. There
+is a whale downstairs and any number of things up-stairs, a moral
+play soon to come off, etc.' 'I know it,' said the rustic, 'and I
+don't care. I've seen Barnum, and I've got my money's worth.'
+
+"Now, ladies and gentlemen, I have not been able to bring to you
+the American Museum to-night, but I have done what is better--I
+have brought to you Mr. Barnum."
+
+ Mr. Barnum then arose, not in the least nonplussed, but greatly
+pleased with the packed house and the hearty cheers which greeted
+him:
+
+ "MR. PRESIDENT, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN:--I cannot, for the life of
+me, see why you should have sent so far as New York for me to
+come and address you. I am not really a lyceum lecturer at all. I
+am only a showman, and it seems you have a man here who can show
+up the showman."
+
+The whole story may read very weakly in print; for Mr. Barnum's
+tones of voice, and gestures and mobility of feature are not
+communicable to cold type. But the playfulness of this unusual
+preface not only stirred the audience on a dismal night, but put
+the lecturer at his very best. Mr. Barnum's lecture was elastic.
+It might be shaped for an hour, as it was not fully written, or
+it might consume more time. On this occasion it was two hours and
+over. While the snow was still falling in open sleighs, that
+could find no shelter, their owners, not minding this, were
+enjoying one of the most delightful evenings of a whole
+winter--of many winters, perhaps.
+
+And all this leads me to say that Mr. Barnum, while claiming no
+part of a professional lecturer's endowment, and only made
+oratory a casual--if it was sometimes a frequent--matter, was,
+nevertheless, admirably equipped to entertain an audience. He
+could tell a story inimitably. His mimetic faculty, like Gough's,
+gave him something of the quality of an actor, so that he
+illustrated well what he had to say. No lectures have proved much
+more instructive and entertaining than Mr. Barnum's on The Art of
+Money Getting; and, wherever he went to address an audience, he
+was sure to be called again.
+
+When I met him in Bridgeport for the first time, I found he was
+easily the chief man of the place. He was living then at
+Lindencroft, on Fairfield Avenue. His Oriental palace, Iranistan,
+had burned down some years before. But, wherever he lived, his
+house gave open welcome to many guests, illustrious and other;
+and no one who had the good fortune to enter it, ever went away
+without connecting with his visit the happiest of memories. At
+the table he especially shone. Wit, repartee, and even puns, when
+occasion offered, coruscated over the meal, and diffused
+universal good humor. He had always at hand innumerable
+anecdotes, which he made peculiarly his own, and which he told
+with inimitable grace and unction. I am sure nobody will ever
+tell them again as he told them; for, contrary to the proverb,
+the prosperity of the jest in his case lay, nine-tenths, in his
+way of relating it--though it was never a dull one.
+
+It mattered not what the business of the day might be, or what
+obstacles or discouragements had been encountered, his
+cheerfulness was perennial and unfailing. Mirth and good cheer
+were apparently inborn and organic with him. He could no more
+suppress them than a fountain could cease bubbling up, or a river
+turn backward in its course. And what men and women he has had,
+first and last, at his table; it is impossible to exhaust the
+list or exaggerate its quality. Horace Greeley, Henry Ward
+Beecher, E. H. Chapin, Bayard Taylor, Mark Twain, and the Cary
+sisters, were a few among Americans; and Thackeray, Matthew
+Arnold, George Augustus Sala, and I know not how many others,
+from abroad. No catalogue of them, but only types can be given
+here. He was almost never without people who made no claim to
+distinction; and to them, too, he was the genial, urbane, and
+entertaining host.
+
+There was a depth of warm humanity in Mr. Barnum's inmost texture
+that his public fame does not fully disclose. That children liked
+him has been already often said; but those in maturer
+youth--young gentlemen and ladies--felt, somehow, that he never
+ceased, at any age, to be their contemporary. No younger and more
+hopeful thoughts were offered than his. If, as sometimes
+happened, when he organized, as he persistently did, the summer
+picnic, inland or on the coast, there was a party made for each
+direction, the struggle was to see which could capture Mr.
+Barnum. Which way the rest of us might go was not of so much
+consequence; but the party which lost him in behalf of the other,
+felt like one trying to enjoy Hamlet with the chief character
+missing.
+
+At one time he actually kept a seaside caterer at a distant beach
+to receive his guests of twenty or more on a place of his own,
+whenever, on summer days, he could collect guests enough and give
+them attention. It was only necessary to send word in the
+morning, and the tables were ready, and the party was conveyed to
+the shady grounds from Mr. Barnum's door. Swings were not
+forgotten for the children, nor was anything forgotten that
+conduced to rational joy. If some poor sick person was heard of
+in the city, one carriage, Mr. Barnum's own, would go somewhat
+out of the way to stop and leave delicacies and presents, not
+without a few words of sympathy and comfort. When, on one
+occasion that I remember, he took two or three hundred people
+from several towns in the State, and from New York, to Charles
+Island, a summer place midway between Bridgeport and New Haven,
+the hospitality was royal, and even the steamboat tickets were
+mysteriously provided for all.
+
+I have never noticed, in the multitude of printed sketches of Mr.
+Barnum's doings, any general mention of his lavish hospitality
+poured out for years, but there will be hundreds who can testify
+to and will remember it. It was as if he had said: "As we go
+along through life let us make others happy." And he did this
+with no niggardliness or stint, in his private life as well as in
+his public career.
+
+There is a series of stories of Mr. Barnum's humane endeavors
+longer than Aesop's or Pilpays' fables combined, and it is
+impossible to relate them all. But I have heard one recently that
+will very well illustrate the beneficial manner of his charity,
+and which shows that, by native sagacity, he had early learned
+the scientific way of giving--to give so that the gift may be
+more than its surface expression, and so as not to produce
+chronic pauperism.
+
+It seems that a poor widow, some years ago, went to Mr. Barnum's
+house and told him she was very poor, and had a large family to
+support; she could not, in fact, decently support them. But if
+Mr. Barnum would only loan her $75 with which to buy a
+sewing-machine, she assured him she could do enough better to be
+able to save a little, and to pay the money back. Mr. Barnum,
+thinking her honest and truthful, said she might have the money
+on the terms suggested, but told her when she had saved the
+requisite amount to bring it to him. After some struggle and
+privation, in due time she did this, and laid it before him.
+"Well," said he, "my good woman, you have now fairly earned your
+sewing-machine, and you have done one thing more, YOU HAVE
+LEARNED HOW TO SAVE." And thereupon he handed back the money, and
+told her to put it in safe keeping.
+
+Mr. Barnum's deep attachment for Bridgeport grew year by year,
+and was most strikingly manifessed. The thousands of trees he had
+set out there, the new streets he opened, and the Seaside Park,
+which was his creation mainly, are but a few of the evidences of
+his public enterprise. The Barnum Historical and Scientific
+Institute, and the Barnum Gymnasium were among his latest
+endowments, East Bridgeport he practically gave existence to, and
+both that and the city proper are so essentially his monument
+that you cannot now divorce the name of Bridgeport from that of
+Barnum.
+
+Some years ago, when certain experiments were made to test the
+presence of ozone in the air, and much was said of its value to
+health, Mr. Barnum had the air at Bridgeport put on trial, and
+proved exultingly that no climate in this country was so
+salubrious as that of Bridgeport, especially in the region of the
+Seaside Park. He was very enthusiastic on the subject, and wrote
+to the local papers, to myself, and to others about it to give
+the fact publicity and proper emphasis.
+
+It may be said by some that Mr. Barnum, in many of his real
+estate enterprises, made money; and so he did, by his foresight,
+faith, and sagacity concerning his adopted town. He partly
+foresaw the future of Bridgeport, and then largely made it. But
+if he had not made money--and his example was open for others to
+follow--he could have had no money to give. He used to say
+himself, half jokingly: "I believe in a profitable philanthropy,"
+which illustrates one of his characteristic traits--his absolute
+frankness. In fact, he was so open-hearted about himself that no
+account he ever gave of his private doings was ever flattering or
+exalted. He wore no phylacteries, and was as far away as possible
+from Pecksniffian pretensions.
+
+In early life he suffered hardship and deprivations, and no Mark
+Tapley ever met them with more composure and, on occasions, with
+more hilarity. But he knew well what comfort and convenience are,
+and when they were at his command he enjoyed their best gifts. He
+once told me that it pained him to see Mr. Greeley omit those
+little cares for himself in later life to which he was surely
+entitled, and so, when he was his guest for many days together,
+he took care to provide him with a loose morning coat and
+comfortable slippers, and would not have him drop in an ordinary
+chair by accident, but secured for him the easiest one.
+
+Busy as Mr. Barnum was, he found many hours for social and other
+pleasures. He did this by his systematic allotment of his time.
+All the machinery of his household and his business ran with a
+smoothness and punctuality that would have delighted George
+Washington. Everything was on time; his meals were regular--not
+movable feasts. It was a wonder how he wrote so many letters,
+foreign and domestic; dispatched so promptly his household and
+his city affairs, and his out-of-town business; met all sorts of
+callers on all sorts of errands; and yet spared time for rides, a
+social game or talk, and an evening out with so much frequency.
+Absolute idleness was positively painful to him; occupation of
+some sort he must have, and to the very end he had and enjoyed
+it.
+
+I can scarcely realize, even now, that he is really gone--so
+clear of mind and active was he to the very last. Nor can it be
+easily imagined how Bridgeport in this generation can accustom
+itself to so great a loss. To hear that the average man--of
+distinction even--has died, seems common and credible. But the
+message which announced Mr. Barnum's death came like a troubled
+dream from which we somehow expect to awaken. That one so full of
+life as to be its very embodiment, should leave us, it will take
+time to fully comprehend. If, in the world, his demise leaves a
+striking and peculiar void, to a multitude of friends it comes
+with a tender sorrow that shall tincture indelibly many flowing
+years.                                        J. B.
+
+----
+
+Among letters that have come to hand we select the following as
+the tribute of a representative American divine:
+
+                                      BROOKLYN, April 16th, 1891.
+Dear Mr. Benton:
+
+There was a Mr. Barnum whom all the world knew, and whose name is
+familiar in every civilized land; but there was another Mr.
+Barnum whom we, his intimate friends knew, and regarded with a
+hearty affection. That he was a most courteous gentleman and the
+entertaining companion at his table and hospitable fireside, is
+but a part of the truth. He had a big warm heart that bound all
+his friends to him with hooks of steel.
+
+I first met him on the platform of a grand temperance banquet, in
+Tripler Hall, New York, thirty-nine years ago--where he and Mr.
+Beecher, and Dr. Chapin, Hon. Horace Mann, Gen. Houston, of
+Texas, and myself were the speakers.
+
+A gold medal was presented that evening to the Hon. Neal Dow, of
+Maine, the father of the "Prohibitory Law." Mr. Barnum made a
+very vivacious and vigorous address. In after years he delivered
+several addresses in behalf of Total Abstinence in my church, and
+they were admirable specimens of close argument, most pungently
+presented. He indulged in but few witticisms or amusing stories;
+for, as he well said, "The Temperance Reform was too SERIOUS a
+matter for trifling jokes and buffooneries."
+
+During the first year of my married life, 1853, Mr. Barnum
+visited me at Trenton, N. J., and he often spoke of the happy
+hour he spent at our table, and the cozy dinner my young wife
+prepared for him. In after years he often sat at my table, and on
+two occasions he entertained me with princely hospitality at his
+Bridgeport mansion. On one occasion he invited the leading
+clergymen of the town to meet me.
+
+We differed very decidedly in our religious creeds, and never
+fell into arguments about them. I honored his conscientious
+convictions, and his staunch adherence to what he believed to be
+the right interpretation of God's Word. With the scoffing
+scepticism of the day he had no sympathy, and utterly abhorred
+it. His kind heart made him a philanthropist, and in his own
+peculiar way he loved to do good to his fellow-men. Surrounded by
+innumerable temptations, he maintained a clean, chaste, and
+honest life, and found his happiest hours in the society of wife
+and children, under his own roof-tree. Had Mr. Barnum devoted
+himself to political life he would have made an excellent figure;
+for he had keen sagacity, vast and varied observations of human
+nature, and sturdy common sense. In conversation with
+intellectual men he always held his own with admirable acumen and
+vigor of expression. He was altogether one of the most unique
+characters that his native State has produced, and when his name
+ceases to be connected with shows and zoological exhibitions, he
+will be lovingly remembered as the genial friend, the sturdy
+patriot, the public-spirited and philanthropic neighbor, and the
+honest, true-hearted man.
+                        Yours respectfully,
+                              THEODORE L. CUYLER.
+
+ THE FUNERAL.
+
+ April 10th, 1891, was the day set for Mr. Barnum's funeral. The
+morning was cold, gray, and dismal. Nature's heart, with the
+spring joy put back and deadened, symboled the melancholy that
+had fallen upon Bridgeport. No town was ever more transformed
+than was this city by one earthly event. On the public and
+private buildings were hung the habiliments of woe; flags were at
+half mast, and, in the store windows were to be seen innumerable
+portraits and likenesses of the dead citizen, surrounded by dark
+drapery, or embedded in flowers.
+
+Nor was this all. The people on the street and in the windows of
+their houses seemed to be thinking of but one thing--their common
+loss. The pedestrian walked slower; the voices of talkers, even
+among the rougher classes, were more subdued, and in their looks
+was imprinted the unmistakable signal of no common or ordinary
+bereavement.
+
+The large church was not only filled, with its lecture-room, a
+considerable time before the hour set for the services; but
+thousands of people crowded the sidewalks near-by for hours,
+knowing they could only see the arrival and departure of the
+funeral cortege. The private services at the house, "Marina,"
+near the Seaside Park, which preceded the public services in the
+church, were simple and were only witnessed and participated in
+by the relatives and immediate friends.
+
+----
+
+ DR. COLLYER'S TRIBUTE.
+
+The immense congregation that filled to repletion the South
+Congregational Church, while the last services were being held
+over the remains of Hon. P. T. Barnum, were deeply impressed with
+the touching tribute which was paid the great showman and public
+benefactor by his old friend, Rev. Robert Collyer, D. D.
+
+It was a pathetic picture which met the eyes of the vast throng.
+The aged preacher, with long white hair hanging loosely on his
+shoulders, and an expression of keen sorrow on his kindly face,
+standing in a small pulpit looking down on the remains of his old
+and cherished friend. The speaker's voice was strong and steady
+throughout his sermon. Each word of that sad panegyric could be
+distinctly heard in all parts of the edifice, but in offering up
+the last prayer, he broke down. The aged preacher made a strong
+effort to control himself, but his voice finally became husky,
+and tears streamed down his wrinkled cheeks. The audience was
+deeply touched by this display of feeling, and many ladies among
+the congregation joined with the preacher and wept freely.
+
+The immense gathering were unusually quiet when the aged minister
+took his place in the pulpit, and his words were strangely clear,
+and distinct in all portions of the church, In his feeling
+tribute, Dr. Collyer said:
+
+"P. T. Barnum was a born fighter for the weak against the strong,
+for the oppressed against the oppressor. The good heart, tender
+as it was brave, would always spring up at the cry for help and
+rush on with the sword of assistance. This was not all that made
+him loved, for the good cheer of his nature was like a halo about
+him. He had always time to right a wrong and always time to be a
+good citizen and patriot of the town, State, or republic in which
+he lived. His good, strong face, was known almost as well on the
+other side. You may be proud of him as he was proud of his town.
+He helped to strengthen and beautify it, and he did beautify it
+in many places. 'It is said that the hand that grasps takes away
+the strength from the hand that ought to give,' and that such a
+man must die without friends or blessings. He was not that man.
+He was always the open and generous man, who could not do too
+much for Bridgeport. He often told me of his desire to help this
+place, and he was not content to wait until after death. What he
+has done for Bridgeport is the same as he has done for other
+noble works. As my brother, Rev. Mr. Fisher, said today, there
+was never anything proposed in this city that had any promise of
+goodness but that he was ready to pour out money and assistance
+for it.
+
+"Faith in one's self fails in the spring if one has not faith in
+God also. He had that faith I know. He had worship, reverence,
+and love in his heart, and as he rests from his labors we meet
+and linger here for a few minutes and pay respect and honor to
+the memory of a great and good man. We can forget that we belong
+to divers churches, and stand here as children of one faith and
+one baptism, honoring for the last time one who has finished his
+labors here and with a crown of glory for his reward, has joined
+in his eternal home the Father he served so well."
+
+When the church services were over, the procession moved to
+Mountain Cemetery, a mile or more distant, where, in a beautiful
+plat, long ago arranged, with a modest monument above it, rest
+the remains of Mr. Barnum's first wife. Here, in a place made
+beautiful by nature and improved by art, was consigned the mortal
+part of him whose story we have tried, weakly, perhaps, to tell.
+Great masses of flowers, similar to those displayed in the house
+and church, were upon the grave and about it, and the people, who
+came there in large numbers, did not leave for hours after the
+religious service had been read.
+
+A book of good size might be made of the notable expressions
+called forth by Mr. Barnum's death from leading journals and men
+known to fame. It is impossible to give any fair sample of them
+here, but the London Times' leader of April 8th may serve,
+perhaps, as a good specimen:
+
+ "Barnum is gone. That fine flower of Western civilization, that
+arbiter elegantiarum to Demos, has lived. At the age of eighty,
+after a life of restless energy and incessant publicity, the
+great showman has lain down to rest. He gave, in the eyes of the
+seekers after amusement, a lustre to America. * * * He created
+the metier of showman on a grandiose scale worthy to be professed
+by a man of genius. He early realized that essential feature of a
+modern democracy, its readiness to be led to what will amuse and
+instruct it. He knew that 'the people' means crowds, paying
+crowds; that crowds love the fashion and will follow it; and that
+the business of the great man is to make and control the fashion.
+To live on, by, and before the public was his ideal. For their
+sake and his own, he loved to bring the public to see, to
+applaud, and to pay. His immense activity, covering all those
+years, marked him out as one of the most typical and conspicuous
+of Yankees. From Jenny Lind to Jumbo, no occasion of a public
+'sensation' came amiss to him.
+
+"Phineas Taylor Barnum, born in 1810, at Bethel, Connecticut--how
+serious and puritanical it sounds! --would have died with a
+merely local reputation unless chance had favored him by putting
+in his way something to make a hit with. He stumbled across
+Charles H. Stratton, the famous, the immortal 'General Tom Thumb'
+of our childhood. Together they came to Europe and held
+'receptions' everywhere. It was the moment when the Queen's
+eldest children were in the nursery, and Barnum saw that a
+fortune depended on his bringing them into friendly relations
+with Tom Thumb. He succeeded; and the British public flocked to
+see the amusing little person who had shown off his mature yet
+miniature dimensions by the side of the baby Heir Apparent. Then
+came the Jenny Lind furore. Then came a publicity of a different
+sort. Mr. Barnum became a legislator for his State, and even, in
+1875, Mayor of Bridgeport. Why not? The man who can organize the
+amusements of the people may very well be trusted to organize a
+few of their laws for them.
+
+"When, in 1889, the veteran brought over his shipload of giants
+and dwarfs, chariots and waxworks, spangles and circus-riders, to
+entertain the people of London, one wanted a Carlyle to come
+forward with a discourse upon 'the Hero as Showman.' It was the
+ne plus ultra of publicity. * * * There was a three-fold
+show--the things in the stalls and cages, the showman, and the
+world itself. And of the three perhaps Barnum himself was the
+most interesting. The chariot races and the monstrosities we can
+get elsewhere, but the octogenarian showman was unique. His name
+is a proverb already, and a proverb it will continue."
+
+
+
+
+
+End of Project Gutenberg Etext of A Unique Story of a Marvellous Career
+Life of Hon. Phineas T. Barnum, by Joel Benton
+
+Tables on pages 294-295 are raw OCR and need fixed!! (see
+barnum.pcx for image file of these pages.)
+