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diff --git a/14462-0.txt b/14462-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..829f96c --- /dev/null +++ b/14462-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1119 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 14462 *** + +THE +Third and last part of Conny-catching. + +With the new deuised knauish arte of +Foole-taking. + +_The like coosnages and villanies never before discouered._ + +By R.G. + +[Illustration] + +Printed by _T.Scarlet_ for _C.Burby_, and are to be solde at +his shop vnder S.Mildreds Church in the Poultrie. 1592. + +TO ALL SVCH AS HAVE +receiued either pleasure or profite by the two +former published bookes of this +Argument: +And to all beside, that desire to know the wonderfull +slie deuises of this hellish crew +of Conny-catchers. + +[Illustration: I] + +In the time of king Henrie the fourth, as our English Chronicles haue +kept in remembrance, liued diuerse sturdie and loose companions in +sundrie places about the Citie of London, who gaue themselues to no +good course of life, but because the time was somewhat troublesome, +watched diligently, when by the least occasion of mutinie offered, +they might praie vppon the goods of honest Citizens, and so by their +spoyle inrich themselues. At that time liued likewise a worthie +Gentleman, whose many verie famius deeds (wherof I am sorie I may here +make no rehearsal, because neither time nor occasion will permitte me) +renowne his name to all ensuing posterities: he, being called sir +_Richard Whittington_, the founder of Whittington Colledge in +London, and one that bare the office of Lord Maior of this Citie three +seuerall times. This worthie man wel noting the dangerous disposition +of that idle kinde of people, tooke such good and discreete order +(after hee had sent diuers of them to serue in the kings warres, and +they loath to doe so well returned to their former vomite) that in no +place of or about London they might haue lodging, or entertainment, +except they applied themselues to such honest trades and exercises, as +might witnesse their maintaining was by true and honest meanes. If any +to the contrarie were founde, they were in iustice so sharply +proceeded against, as the most hurtfull and dangerous enemies to the +commonwealth. + +In this quiet and most blissefull time of peace, when all men (in +course of life) should shew themselves most thankfull for so great a +benefit, this famous citie is pestered with the like, or rather worse +kinde of people, that beare outward shew of ciuill, honest, and +gentlemanlike disposition, but in very deed their behauiour is most +infamous to be spoken of. And as now by their close villanies they +cheate, cosen, prig, lift, nippe, and such like tricks now vsed in +their _Conie-catching_ Trade, to the hurt and vndoing of many an +honest Citizen, and other: So if God should in iustice be angrie with +vs, as our wickednesse hath well deserued, and (as the Lorde forsend) +our peace should be molested as in former time, euen as they did, so +will these be the first in seeking domesticall spoile and ruine: yea +so they may haue it, it skilles not how they come by it. God raise +such another as was worthie _Whittington_, that in time may +bridle the headstrong course of this hellish crew, and force them liue +as becommeth honest subiects, or els to abide the rewarde of their +loosenesse. + +By reading this little tratise ensuing, you shall see to what +marueilous subtil pollicies these deceiuers have atteyned, and how +daylie they practise strange driftes for their purpose. I say no more, +but if all these forewarnings may be regarded, to the beneft of the +well minded, and iust controll of these carelesse wretches, it is all +I desire, and no more then I hope to see. + +Yours in all he may + +R. G. + +[Illustration: ] + + +The third and last part of Conny-catching with the new deuifed knauish +Arte of Fooletaking. + + +Being by chance inuited to supper, where were present diuers, both of +worship an good accompt, as occasion serued for entercourse of talke, +the present treacheries and wicked deuises of the world was called in +question. Amongst other most hatefull and wel worthie reprebension, +the woondrous villanies of loose and lewde persons, that beare the +shape of men, yet are monsters in condition, was specially remembred, +and not onely they, but their complices, their confederates, their +base natured women and close compacters were noted: Namely, such as +tearme themselues Conny-catchers, Crosse-biters, with their +appertaining names to their seueral coosening qualities, as already is +made knowne to the world, by two seuerall imprinted books, by means +whereof, the present kinde of conference was occasioned. Quoth a +Gentleman sitting at the Table, whose deepe step into age deciphered +his experience, and whose grauitie in speeche reported his discretion, +quoth hee, by the two published bookes of Cony-catching: I have seene +divers thinges whereof I was before ignorant, not withstanding had I +beene acquainted with the author: I could haue giuen him such notes of +notorious matters that way intending, as in neither of the pamphlets +are the like set downe. Beside, they are so necessarie to be knowne, +as they will both forearme any man against such trecherous vipers, and +forewarne the simpler sort from conuersing with them. The Gentleman +being knowne to be within commission of the peace, and that what he +spake of either came to him by examinations, or by riding in the +circuits as other like officers do: was intreated by one man aboue the +rest (as his leisure serued him) to acquaint him with those notes, and +he would so bring it to passe, as the writer of the other two bookes, +should haue the sight of them, and if theyr quantitie would serue, +that he should publish them as a third, and more necessary part then +the former were. The Gentleman replied al such notes as I speake, are +not of mine owne knowledge, yet from such men haue I receiued them, as +I dare assure their truth: and but that by naming men wronged by such +mates, more displeasure would ensue then were expedient, I could set +downe both time, place, and parties. But the certaintie shal suffice +without any such offence. As for such as that see their iniuries +discouered, and (biting the lip) say to themselues, thus was I made a +Conny: their names being shadowed, they haue no cause of anger, in +that the example of their honest simplicitie beguiled, may shield a +number more endangered from tasting the like. And seeing you haue +promised to make them knowne to the author of the former two Bookes, +you shall the sooner obtaine your request: assuring him thus much vpon +my credit & honestie, that no one vntrueth is in the notes, but euerie +one credible, and to be iustified if need serue. Within a fortnight +or thereabout afterward, the Gentleman performed his promise, in +seuerall papers sent the notes, which here are in our book compiled +together when thou hast read, say, if euer thou heardest more notable +villanies discouered. And if thou or thy friends receiue any good by +this, as it cannot be but they will make a number more carefull of +themselues: thanke the honest Gentleman for his notes, and the writer +that published both the other and these, for generall example. + +A pleasant tale howe an honest substantiall Citizen was made a Connie, +and simplie entertained a knaue that carried awaie his goods verie +politickly. + +What laws are used among this helish crew, what words and termes they +give themselves and their copesmates, are at large set downe in the +former two Bookes: let it suffise yee then in this, to read the simple +true discourses of such as have by extraordinary cunning and treachery +beene deceived, and remembering their subtle meanes there, and slye +practises here, be prepared against the reaches of any such +companions. + +Not long since, a crew of Conny-catchers meeting togither, and in +conference, laying downe such courses as they severally should take, +to shunne suspect, and returne a common benfit among them: the Carders +received their charge, the Dicers theirs, the hangers about the court +theirs, the followers of Sermons theirs and so the rest to their +offices. But one of them especiallie, who at their woonted meetings, +when reporte was made howe every purchase was gotten, and by what +pollycie each one prevailed: this fellowe in a kinde of priding +scorne, would usually say. + +In faithe Maisters these thinges are prettily done, common sleyghts, +expressing no deepe reache of witte, and I woonder men are so simple +to bee so beguiled. I would fayne see some rare and artificiall feate +indeede, that some admiration and fame might insue the dooing thereof: +I promise yee, I disdayne these base and pettie paltries, and may my +fortune iumpe with my resolution, yee shall heare my boyes with in a +day or two, that I will accomplish a rare stratagem indeed, of more +value then fortie of yours, and when it is done shall carry some +credit with it. They wondring at his wordes, desired to see the +successe of them, & so dispersing themselves as they were accustomed, +left this frollicke fellow pondering on his affaires. A Cittizens +house in London, which hee had diligently eyed & aymed at for a +fortnights space, was the place wherein he must performe this exploit, +and having learned one of the servant maides name of the house, as +also where shee was borne and her kindred. Upon a sonday in the +afternone, when it was her turne to attend on her maister and mistres +to the garden in Finsbury fields, to regard the children while they +sported about, this craftie mate having dulie watched their comming +forth, and seeing that they intended to goe downe S. Laurence lane, +stepped before them, ever casting an eye back, least they should turne +some contrarie way: but their following still fitting his owne desire, +neere unto the Conduit in Aldermanbury, he crossed the way and came +unto the maid, and kissing her sayd. Coosen Margeret, I am verye glad +to see you well, my unckle your father, and all your friends in the +Countrey are in good health God be praised. The Maide hearing herselfe +named, and not knowing the man, modestly blushed, which hee +perceiving, held way on with her amongst her fellow apprentices, and +thus began againe. I see Coosen you knowe mee not, and I doe not +greatlie blame you, it is so long since you came foorth of the +Countrey, but I am such a ones sonne, naming her Uncle right, and his +sonnes name, which she very well remembred, but had not seene him in +eleven yeares. Then taking foorth a bowed groat, and an olde pennie +bowed, he gave it her as being sent from her Uncle and Aunt, whome hee +tearmed to bee his father and mother: Withall (quoth he) I have a +Gammon of bacon and a Cheese from my Uncle your Father, which are sent +to your Maister and Mistresse, which I received of the Carrier, +because my Uncle enioyned me to deliver them, when I must intreat your +mistres, that at Whitsontide next shee will give you leave to come +downe into the Countrey. The Maide thinking simplie all hee said was +true, and as they so farre from their parents, are not onely glad to +heare of their welfare, but also rejoyce to see any of their kindred: +so this this poor Maid, wel knowing her Uncle had a sonne so named as +he called himself, and thinking from a boy (as he was at her leaving +the Countrey) he was now growne such a proper handsome young man, was +not a little joyful to see him: beside, shee seemed proud, that her +kinsman was so neat a youth, and so shee held on questioning with him +about her friends: hee soothing each matter so cunningly, as the maide +was confidently perswaded of him. In this time, one of the children +stepped to her mother and said, Our Marget (mother) hath a fine coosen +come out of the Country, and he hath a Cheese for my Father and you: +whereon shee looking backe, said: Maide, is that your kinsman? yes +forsooth mistresse quoth shee, my Uncles sonne, whome I left a little +one when I came forth of the countrey. + +The wilye Treacher, beeing maister of his trade, would not let slippe +this opportunitie, but courteouslie stepping to the Mistresse (who +loving her maid wel, because indeed shee had been a very good servant, +and from her first comming to London had dwelt with her, tould her +husband therof) coyned such a smooth tale unto them both, fronting it +with the Gammon of Bacon and the Cheese sent from their maides Father, +and hoping they would giue her leaue at Whitsontide to visit the +countrey, as they with verie kinde words entertained him, inuiting him +the next night to supper, when he promised to bring with him the +Gammon of Bacon and the Cheese. Then framing an excuse of certaine +busines in the town, for that time he tooke his leaue of the Maister +and Mistresse, and his new Cosen Margaret, who gave many a looke after +him (poore wench) as he went, ioying in her thoughts to haue such a +kinsman. + +On the morrow hee prepared a good Gammon of bacon, which he closed up +in a soiled linnen cloth, and sewed an old card vpon it, whereon he +wrote a superscription vnto the Maister of the Maide, and at what +signe it was to be deliuered, and afterward scraped some of the +letters halfe out, that it might seeme they had bin rubd out in the +carriage. A good Cheese he prepared likewise, with inscription +accordingly on it, that it could not be discerned, but that some +unskilfull writer in the country had done it, both by the grosse +proportion of the letters, as also the bad ortographie which amongst +plaine husbandmen is verie common, in that they haue no better +instruction. So hiring a Porter to carrie them betweene flue and fire +in the evening he comes to the cittizens house, and entring the shop, +receives them of the Porter, whome the honest meaning Cittizen would +have paid for his pains, but this his maids new-found Cosen sayd hee +was satisfied alreadie, and so straining courtesse would not permit +him: well, vp are carried the Bacon and the Cheese, where God knowes, +Margaret was not a little busse, to haue all things fine and neat +against her Cosens comming vp, her Mistresse like wise, (as one well +affecting her seruant) had prouided verie good cheere, set all her +plate on the Cubboorde for shewe, and beautified the house with +Cusheons, carpets, stooles and other deuises of needle worke, as at +such times diuers will do, to haue the better report made of their +credite amongst their seruants friends in the Country, albeit at this +time (God wot) it turned to theyr owne after-sorrowing. The maister +of the house, to delay the time while Supper was readye, hee likewise +shewes this dissembler his shop, who seeing things fadge so pat to his +purpose, could question of this sort, and that well enougth I warrant +you, to discern the best from the worst and their appointed places, +purposing a further reache then the honest Cittizen dreamed of: and to +bee plaine with ye, such was this occupiers trade, as though I may not +name it, yet thus much I dare vtter, that the worst thing he could +carry away, was aboue twentie nobles, because hee dealt altogeather in +whole and great sale, which made this companion forge this kindred and +aquaintance, for an hundred pound or twaine was the very least he +aimed at. At length the mistresse sendes word supper is on the Table, +where vpon vp hee conducts his guest, and after diuers welcomes, as +also thanks for the Cheese and Bacon: To the Table they sit, where let +it suffice, hee wanted no ordinarie good fare, wine and other knackes, +beside much talke of the Countrey, how much his friends were beholding +for his Cosen Margaret, to whome by her mistresse leaue hee dranke +twise or thrise, and she poore soule dooing the like againe to him +with remembrance of her father and other kindred, which he stil +smoothed very cunningly. Countenance of talke made them careles of +the time which slipped from them faster then they were aware of, nor +did the deceiuer hasten his departing, because he expected what indeed +followed, which was, that being past tenne of the clocke, and he +feigning his lodging to be at Saint Gyles in the field, was intreated +both by the goodman and his wife to take a bed there for that night, +for fashion sake (though very glad of this offer) hee said he would +not troble them, but giuing them many thanks, would to his lodging +though it were further. But wonderfull it was to see how earnest the +honest Citizen and his wife laboured to perswade him, that was more +willing to staye then they could bee to bid him, and what dissembled +willingnesse of departure hee vsed on the other side, to couer the +secret villanie intended. Well, at the length with much ado, he is +contented to stay, when Margaret and her Mistresse presently stirred +to make ready his bed, which the more to the honest mans hard hap, but +all the better for this artificial Conny-catcher, was in the same room +where they supped, being commonly called their hall, and there indeed +stood a verie faire bed, as in such sightly roumes it may easily bee +thought, Citizens vse not to haue any thing meane or simple. The +mistresse, least her guest should imagine she disturbed him, suffered +all the plate to stand still on the cupbord: and when she perceiued +his bed was warmed, and euery thing els according to her mind, she and +her husband bidding him good night: tooke themselues to their chamber, +which was on the same floore but inward, hauing another chamber +betweene them and the hall, wherw the maides and children had their +lodging. So desiring him to call for any thing hee wanted, and +charging Margaret to looke it should bee so, to bed are they gone: +when the Apprentises hauing brought vp the keyes of the street dore, & +left them in their maisters chamber as they were woont to do, after +they had said praiers, their evening exercise, to bed go they +likewise, which was in a Garret backward ouer their maisters +chamber. None are nowe vp but poore Margaret and her counterfeit +coosen, whom she loth to offend with long talke, because it waxed +late: after some few more speeches, about their parents and friends in +the countrey, she seeing him laid in bed, and all such thinges by him +as she deemed needfull, with a low courtesie I warrant ye, commits him +to his quiet, and so went to bed to her fellowes the maidseruants. +Well did this hypocrite perceive the keyes of the doores carried into +the goodmans chamber, wherof he being not a litle glad, thoght now +they would imagine all things sure, and therfore doutlesse sleep the +sounder: as for the keyes, he needed no helpe of them, because such as +hee go neuer vnprouided of instruments fitting their trade, & so at +this time was this notable trecher. In the dead time of the night when +sound sleepe makes the eare vnapt to heare the verie least noyse, he +forsaketh his bed, & hauing gotten al the plate bound up togither in +his cloke, goeth down into the shop, where well remembring both the +plate & parcels, maketh vp his pack with some twenty pounds worth of +goods more. Then setling to his engin, he getteth the doore off the +hinges, and being foorth, lifteth close to againe, and so departs, +meeting with in a doozen paces, three or foure of his companions that +lurked therabouts for the purpose. Their word for knowing each other, +as is said, was Quest, and this villains comfortable newes to them, +was Twag, signifiyng hee had sped: ech takes a fleece for easier +carriage, and so away to Belbrow, which as I haue heard is as they +interpret it, the house of a theefe receiuer, without which they can +do nothing, and this house with an apt porter to it, standes ready for +them al houres of the night: too many such are there in London, the +maisters whereof beare countenance of honest substantiall men, but all +their living is gotten in this order, the end of such (though they +scape awhile) will be sailing westward in a Cart to Eiborn. Imagine +these villanies there in their iollitie, the one porting point by +point his cunning deceipt, and the other (fitting his humour) +extolling the deede with no meane commendations. But returning to the +honest Citizen, who finding in the morning how dearly he paid for a +gammon of bacon, and a cheese, and how his kinde courtesie was thus +trecherously requited: blames the poore maide, as innocent herein as +himselfe, and imprisoning her, thinking so to regaine his owne: griefe +with ill cherishing there shortens her life: And thus ensueth one hard +hap upon another, to the great griefe both of maister and mistresse, +when the trueth was knowne, that they so wronged their honest servant: +how it may forewarne others, I leave to your owne opinions, that see +what extraordinarie devises are now avayed, to beguile the simple and +honest liberall minded. + + + + +Of a notable knave, who for his cunning deceiving a gentleman of his +purse: scorned the name of a Conny-catcher, and would needs be termed +a Foole-taker, as maister and beginner Of that new found Arte. + + +A Crew of these wicked companions, being one day met togither in Pauls +Church (as that is a usual place of their assemblie, both to determin +on their drifts, as also to speed of many a bootie) seeing no +likelihood of a good afternoone, so they tearme it either fore-noone +or after, when ought is to be done: some dispersed themselves to the +plaies, other to the bowling allies and not past two or three stayed +in the Church. Quoth on of them, I have vowed not to depart, but +something or other Ile haue before I go: my minde giues me, that this +place yet will yeelde us all our suppers this night, the other holding +like opinion with him, there likewise walked vp and downe, looking +when occasion would serue for some Cash. At length they espyed a +Gentleman towarde the lawe entring in at the little North doore, and a +countrey Clyent going with him in verye hard talke, the Gentleman +holding his gowne open with his armes on eyther side as very manie +doe, gaue sight of a faire purple velvet purse, which was halfe put +vnder his girdle: which I warrant you the resolute fellow that would +not depart without some thing, had quicklye espyed. A game, quote hee +to his fellows, marke the stand, and so separating themselves walked +aloofe, the Gentleman going to the nether steppe of the staires that +ascend vp into the Quire, and there he walked still with his +client. Oft this crew of mates met together, and said there was no +hope of nipping the bong because he held open his gowne so wide, and +walked in such an open place. Base knaves, quoth the frolik fellowe, +if I say I will have it, I must have it, though hee that owes it had +sworne the contrarie. Then looking aside, hee spyed his trugge or +queane comming vppe the Church: away, quoth hee to the other, go looke +you for some other purchase, this wench and I are suffient for +this. They goe, he lessons the drab in this sort, that shee should to +the Gentleman, whose name shee verye well knew, in that shee had holpe +to coosen him once before, & pretending to be sent to him from one he +was well acquainted with for his councell should give him his fee for +auoiding suspition, & so frame some wrong done hir as well inough she +could: when her mate (taking occasion as it serued) would woorke the +meane, shee should strike, & so they both prevaile. The queane well +inured with such courses, because she was one of the most skilful in +that profession, walked up and downe alone in the Gentlemans sight, +that he might discerne shee stayed to speake with him, and as he +turned toward her, hee saw her take money out of her purse, whereby +hee gathered some benefite was toward him: which made him the sooner +dispatch his other clyent, when shee stepping to him, told such a tale +of commendations from his verie friend, that had sent her to him as +she said, that hee entertained her very kindly, and giving him his fee, +which before her face he put up into his purse, and thrust under his +girdle againe: she proceeded to a very sound discourse, whereto he +listened with no little attention. The time serving fit for the +fellows purpose, he came behind the Gentleman, and as many times one +friend wil familiarly with another, clap his hands over his eyes to +make him guesse who he is, so did this companion, holding his hands +fast over the Gentlemans eyes, sayde: who am I: twise or thrise, in +which time the drab had gotten the purse and put it up. The Gentleman +thinking it had been some merrie friend of his, reckoned the names of +three or foure, when letting him go, the crafty knave dissembling a +bashful shame of what he had done, said: By my troth sir I crie ye +mercy, as I came in at the Church doore, I took ye for such a one +(naming a man) a verie friend of mine, whome you very much resemble: I +beseech ye be not angrie, it was verie boldlye done of me, but in +penance of my fault, so please yee to accept it, I will bestow a +gallon or two of Wine on yee, and so laboured him earnestly to go with +him to the taverne, stil alledging his sorow for mistaking him. The +Gentleman little suspecting how who am I had handled him, seeing how +sorie he was, and seeming to be a man of no such base condition: tooke +all in good part, saying: No harme sir, to take one for another, a +fault wherein any man may easily erre, and so excusing the acceptation +of his wine, because he was busie there with a gentlewoman his friend: +the trecher with courtesie departed, & the drab (having what shee +would) shortning her tale, hee desiring her to come to his Chamber the +next morning, went to the place where her copes-mate and she met, and +not long after, divers other of the crue, who bearing in what manner +this act was performed, smiled a good therat, that she had both got +the Gentlemans purse, her owne money againe, and his advise for iust +nothing. He that had done this tall exploit, in a place so open in +view, so hardly to be come by, & on a man that made no meane esteem of +his wit: bids his fellowes keepe the worthles name of a Conny-catcher +to themselves: for he hence-foorth would bee termed a Foole-taker, and +such as could imitate this quaint example of his, (which he would set +down as an entrance into that art) should not thinke scorne to become +his schollers. + +Night drawing on apace, the Gentleman returned home, not al this while +missing his purse, but being set at supper, his wife intreated a pint +of Sack, which hee minding to send for: drewe to his purse, and seeing +it gone, what strange lookes (beside sighs) were betweene him and his +wife. I leave to your supposing, and blame them not: for as I have +heard, there was seven pound in gold, beside thirtie shillings and od +white money in the purse. But in the middle of his griefe, hee +remembred him that said, who am I: Wherewith hee brake foorth into a +great laughter, the cause whereof his wife beeing desirous to know, he +declared all that passed between him and the deceiuer, as also how +sone afterward the queane abreuiated her discourse and followed: so in +troth wife (quoth he) betweene who am I and the drab, my purse is +gone: let his lesse teach others to looke better to theirs. + +An other Tale of a coosening companion, who would needs trie his +cunning in this new inuentcd arte, and how by his knauerie (at one +instant) he beguiled halfe a dozen and more. + +Of late time there hath a certaine base kinde of trade beene vsed, who +though diuers poore men, and doubtles honest, apply themselues onely +to relieue their need: yet are there some notorious varlets do the +same, being compacted with such kinde of people, as this present +treatise manifesteth to the world, and what with outward simplicity on +the one side, and cunning close treachery on the other, diuers honest +Cittizens and day-labouring men, that resort to such places as I am to +speake of, onely for recreation as opportunitie serueth, haue beene of +late sundry times deceyued of their purses. This trade, or rather +vnsufferable loytring qualitie, in singing of Ballets, and songs at +the doores of such houses where playes are vsed, as also in open +markets and other places of this Cittie, where is most resort: which +is nothing els but a slie fetch to draw many together, who listning +vnto an harmelesse dittie, afterwarde walke home to their houses with +heauie hearts: from such as are heereof true witnesses to their cost, +doo I deliuer this example. A subtill fellow, belike imboldned by +acquaintance with the former deceit, or els being but a beginner to +practise the same, calling certain of his companions together, would +try whether he could attaine to be maister of his art or no, by taking +a great many of fools with one traine: but let his intent and what els +beside, remaine to abide the censure after the mater is heard, and +come to Gratious street, where this villanous pranke was performed. A +roging mate, & such another with them were there got vpon a stal +singing of balets, which belike was some prety toy, for very many +gathered about to heare it, & divers buying, as their affections +serued, drew to their purses, & paid the singers for them. The slie +mate and his fellowes, who were dispersed among them that stood to +hear the songs well noted where euerie man that bought, put up his +purse againe, and to such as would not buy, counterfeit warning was +sundrie times giuen by the roge and his associate, to beware of the +cut-purse, & take to their purses, which made them often feel where +their purses were, either in sleeue, hose, or at girdle, to know +whether they were safe or no. Thus the crafty copesmates were +acquainted with what they most desired, and as they were scatred by +shouldring, thrusting, feining to let fall somthing, and other wilie +tricks fit for their purporse: heere one lost his purse, there another +had his pocket pickt, & to say all in briefe, at one instant, vpon the +complaint of one or two that saw their purses were gone, eight more in +the same companie, found themselues in like predicament. Some angrie, +others sorrowfull, and all greatly discontented, looking about them, +knewe not who to suspect or challenge, in that the villaines +themselues that had thus beguiled them, made shew that they had +sustained like losse. But one angry fellow, more impacient then all +the rest, he falls vpon the ballad singer, and beating him with his +fists well favouredly, sayes, if he had not listned his singing, he +had not lost his purse, and therefore would not be otherwise +perswaded, but that they two and the cutpurses were compacted +together. The rest that had lost their purses likewise, & saw that so +many complaine togither: they iump in opinion with the other fellow, & +begin to tug & hale the ballad singers when one after one, the false +knaves began to shrink away with the purses, by means of some officer +then being there present, the two Roges were had before a iustice, and +upon his discreete examination made, it was found, that they and the +cut-purses were compacted together, and that by this unsuspected +villanie, they had deceived many. The one Foole-taker himself, with +one or two more of that companie, was not long after apprehended: when +I doubt not but they had their reward answerable to their deseruing: +for I heare of their iorney westward, but not of their returne: let +this forewarne those that listen singing in the streets. + +Of a craftie mate, that brought two young men vnto a Tauerne, where +departing with a Cup, hee left them to pay both for the wine and Cup. + + +A friend of mine sent mee this note, and assuring me the truth +thereof, I thought necessary to let it downe amongst the rest: both +for the honest simplicitie on the one side and most cunning knavery +used on the other, and thus it was. Two young men of familiar +acquaintance, who delighted much in musicke, because themselves +therein were somwhat expert, as on the virginals, bandora, lute and +such like: were one eventing at a common inne of this town (as I have +heard) where the one of them shewed his skil on the virginals to the +no little contentment of the hearers. Now as divers guests of the +house came into the roome to listen, so among the rest entered an +artificial Cony-catcher, who as occasion served, in the time of +ceasing between the severall toies and fancies be plaied: very much +commended his cunning, quick hand, and such qualities praiseworthy in +such a professor. The time being come, when these young men craved +leaue to depart, this politique varlet stepping to them, desired that +they would accept a quarte of Wine at his hande, which hee would most +gladlie bestow upon them: besides, if it liked him that played on the +Virginals to instruct, hee would helpe him to so good a place, as +happily might advantage him for ever. These kind words, delivered with +such honest outward shewe, caused the yoong men, whose thoughts were +free from any other opinion, than to bee as truely and plainly dealt +withall as themselves meant, accepted his offer, because hee that +played on the Virginals was desirous to have some good place of +seruice: & hereupon to the Tauerne they goe, and being set, the wily +companion calleth for two pintes of wine, a pinte of white, and a +pinte of claret, casting his cloake upon the table, and falling to his +former communication of preferring the yoong man. The wine is +brought, and two cuppes withall, as is the vsuall manner: when +drinking to them of the one pinte, they pledge him, not unthankfull +for his gentlenesse. After some time spent in talke, and as he +perceived fit for his purpose, hee takes the other cup, and tastes the +other pinte of wine: wherewith he finding fault, that it dranke +somewhat harde, sayd, that Rose-water and Sugar would do no harme: +whereupon he leaves his seate, saying he was well acquainted with one +of the seruants of the house, of whom he could have two penny worth of +Rose-Water for a penny, and so of Sugar likewise, wherefore be would +step to the barre unto him, so taking the cup in his hand, hee did: +the young men neuer thinking on any such treacherie as ensued, in that +he seemed an honest man, and beside left his cloake lying on the table +by them. No more returnes the yonker with Rose-water and Sugar, but +stepping cut of doores, unseene of any, goes away roundly with the +cup. The young men not a little wondering at his long tarrying, by the +comming of the seruants to see what they wanted, who tooke no regarde +of his sudden departure, finde themselves there left, not onely to pay +for the wine, but for the Cuppe also, being rashlye supposed by the +maister and his seruants to be copartners with the treacherous +villaine: but their honest behaviour well knowne, as also their +simplicity too much abused, well witnessed their innocencie: +notwithstanding they were faine to pay for the cup, as afterwarde they +did, hauing nothing towardes their charge but a thred bare cloake not +worth two shillings. Take heede how you drinke wine with any such +companions. + +Of an honest housholder which was cuningly deceyued by a subtill +companion, that came to hire a Chamber for his Master. + +Not farre from Charing Crosse dwelleth an honest young man, who being +not long since married, and having more roomes in his house than +himselfe occupyeth, either for terme time, or the Court lying so +neere, as divers do, to make a reasonable commoditie, and to ease +house-rent, which (as the worlde goeth now to none of the cheapest) +letteth foorth a chamber or two, according as it may be spared. In an +evening but a while since, came one in the manner of a Seruing man to +this man and his wife, and he must needes have a Chamber for his +Maister, offering so largely, as the bargaine was soone concluded +betweene them. His intent was to have fingered some bootie in the +house, as by the sequele it may bee likeliest gathered: but belike no +fit thing lying abroad, or hee better regarded then happily be would +be, his expectation that way was frustrated, yet as a resolute +Conny-catcher indeed, that scorneth to attempt without some successe, +and rather will pray upon small commoditye, then returne to his +fellows disgraced with a lost labor: he summons his wits together, & +by a smooth tale over-reached both the man and his wife. He tels them, +that his Maister was a captaine late come from the Sea, and had costly +apparel to bring thither, which for more earlie carriage, he entreats +them lend him a sheet to bind it vp in, they suspecting no ill, +because he required their boy should goe with him to helpe him cary +the stuffe, the good wife steppes vnto her Chest, where her linnen lay +finelie sweetned with Rose leaves and Lavender, and lends him a very +good sheete in deed. + +This successe made him bold to venter a little further, and then he +tels them, his maister had a great deale of broken Sugar, and fine +spices that lay negligently abroad in his lodging as it was brought +from the Ship, all which hee was assured his Maister would bestow on +them, so he could deuise how to get it brought thither. + +These liberall promises, prevailing with them that lightlie beleeued, +and withall were somewhat couetous of the Sugar and spices: The woman +demanded if a couple of pillow-beeres would not serue to bring the +sugar and spices in: yes marry (quoth hee) so the Sugar may best be +kept by it self, and the spices by themselves. And (quoth hee) +because there are many craftie knaues abroad,(greeving that any should +be craftier then himselfe) and in the evening the linnen might +quicklie bee snatched from the boy: for the more safety, he would +carry the sheet and pillow-beeres himselfe, & within an hower or +little more returne with the boy againe, because he would have all +things redy before his maister came, who (as he said) was attending on +the Councell at the court. The man and his wife crediting his smooth +speeches, sends their boy with him, and so along toward Zuie-bridge go +they. The Conny-catcher seeing himselfe at free libertie, that he had +gotten a very good sheet, and two fine pillow-beeres: steps to the +wall, as though he would make water, bidding the boye goe faire and +softly on before. The boy doubting nothing, did as hee willed him, +when presently he stept into some house hard by fit to entertaine him: +and neuer since was hee, his Maister, the Sugar, spices, or the linnen +heard off. Manie have beene in this manner deceived, as I heare, let +this then giue them warning to beware of any such unprofitable guests. + +Of one that came to buy a knife, and made first proofe of his trade on +him that solde it. + +One of the cunning Nippes about the towne, came unto a poore Cutler to +have a Cuttle made according to his owne minde, and not aboue three +inches would he have both the knife and the haft in length: yet of +such pure mettall, as possibly may bee. Albeit the poore man never +made the like before, yet being promised foure times the value of his +stuffe and paines, he was contented to doe this, and the day being +come that hee should deliuer it, the partie came, who liking it +exceedingly, gaue him the money promised, which the poore man gladly +put up into his purse, that hung at a button hole of his wascoate +before his brest, smiling that he was so well paid for so small a +trifle: the partie perceiuing his merry countenance, and imagining he +gest for what purpose the knife was, sayde, honest man, whereat smile +you? By my troth sir (quoth the Cutler) I smile at your knife, because +I never made one so litle before: and were it not offensive unto you, +I would request to know to what use you will put it too? Wilt thou +keepe my counsaile (quoth the Nipe) yea on mine honestie (quoth the +Cutler.) Then hearken in thy eare said the Nip, and so rounding with +him, cut the poore mans purse that houng at his bosom, he neuer +faeling when he did it: with this knife (quoth the Nippe) meane I to +cut a purse, marry GOD forbid (quoth the Cutler) I cannot thinke you +to be such a kind of man, I see you loue to iest, and so they parted. + +The poore man, not so wise as to remember his owne purse, when by such +a warning hee might haue taken the offendour dooing the deede, but +rather proud (as it were) that his money was so easily earned: walkes +to the Alehouse, which was within a house or two of his owne, and +finding there three or foure of his neighbors with whom he began to +iest very pleasantly: sweares by cocke and pie hee would spend a whole +groat uppon them, for hee had gotten it and more, cleerely by a good +bargaine that morning. + +Though it was no maruell to see him so liberall, because indeede he +was a good companion: yet they were loth to put him to such cost, +nothwithstanding he would need doe it, and so farre as promise +stretcht, was presently fild in and set upon the boord. In the +drinking time often he wisht to meet more such customers as he had +done that morning, and commended him for a very honest gentleman I +warrant you. At length, when the reckoning was to be paide, hee drawes +to his purse, where finding nothing left but a peece of the string in +the button hole, I leave to your iudgement, whether he was now as +sorie as he was merrie before. + +Blanck and all amort sits the poore Cutler, and with such a pittifull +countenance, as his neighbours did not a little admire his solemne +alteration, and desirous to know the cause thereof, from point to +point he discourseth the whole manner of the tragedie, neuer naming +his new customer, but with such a farre fetcht sigh, as soule and body +would have parted in sunder. And in midst of all his griefe, he brake +forth into these termes. Ile belieue a man the better by his word +while I know him, the knife was bought to cut a purse indeed, and I +thanke him for it, hee made the first proofe of the edge with mee. The +neigbbours greeving for his losse, yet smiling at his folly to be so +overreached, were faine to pay the groate the Cutler called in, +because he had no other money about him, and spent as much more beside +to driue away his heauinesse. + +This tale, because it was somewhat misreported before, upon talke had +with the poore Cutler himselfe, is set downe now in true forme and +manner how it was done, therefore is there no offence offered, when by +better consideration, a thing may be enlarged or amended, or at least +the note be better confirmed. Let the poore Cutlers mishap example +others, that they brag not over hastily of gaine easily gotten, least +they chance to pay as deerely for it, as he did. + +Of a yoong Nip that cunningly beguiled an antient professor of that +trade, and his queane with him, at a play. + +A good fellow that was newly entered into the nipping craft, and had +not as yet attained to any acquaintance with the chiefe and cunning +maisters of that trade: In the Christmas holy-dayes last, came to see +a playe at the Bull within Bishops gate, there to take his benefit as +time and place would permit him. Not long had hee stayed in the +prease, but hee had gotten a yoong mans purse out of his pocket, which +when he had, hee stepped into the stable to take out the money, and to +conuey away the purse. But looking on his commoditie, hee founde +nothing therein but white counters, a thimble and a broken three +pence, which belike the fellowe that ought it, had doone of purpose to +deceiue the cutpurse withall, or else had plaide at the Cardes for +counters, and so carried his winnings about him till his next sitting +to playe. Somewhat displeased to be so ouertaken, he looked aside, and +spied a lustie youth entring at the doore, and his drab with him; this +fellow he had heard to bee one of the finest Nippers about the towne, +and euer caried his queane with him, for conueiance when the stratagem +was performed: he puts up the counters into the purse againe, and +follows close to see some peece of their seruice. Among a companie of +seemely men was this lustie companion and his minion gotten, where +both they might best beholde the playe, and work for aduantage, and +ever this young Nip was next to him, to mark when he should attempt +any exployte, standing as it were more then halfe between the cunning +Nip and his drab, onely to learne some part of their skill. In short +time the deed was performed, but how, the young Nip could not easily +discern, only he felt him shift his hand toward his trug, to convey +the purse to her, but she being somwhat mindful of the play, because a +merriment was then on the stage, gaue no regarde: whereby thinking he +had puld her by the coat, hes twicht the young Nip by the cloke, who +taking advantage of this offer, put downe his hand and receiued the +purse of him: then counting it discourtesse to let him loose al his +labour, he softly pluckt the queane by the coate, which shee feeling, +and imagining it had beene her companions hand: receiued of him the +first purse with the white counters in it. Then fearing least his stay +should hinder him, and seeing the other intended to have more purses +ere he departed: away goes the young Nip with the purse he got to +eastiy, wherein (as I haue heard) was xxvii. shillings and odde mony, +which did so much content him, as that he had beguiled so ancient a +stander in that profession: what the other thought when he found the +purse, and could not gesse howe hee was coosened: I leave to your +censures, onely this makes me smile, that one false knave can beguile +another, which biddes honest men looke the better to their pursses. + +How a Gentleman was craftily deceived of a Chayne of Golde and his +pursse, in Paules Church in London. + +A Gentleman of the countrey, who (as I have herd since the time of his +mishap, whereof I am now to speake) had about halfe a yeere before +buryed his wife, and belike thinking wel of some other Gentlewoman, +whom hee ment to make account of as his second choice: upon good hope +or other wife persuaded, he came up to London to provide himselfe of +such necessaries as the Countrey is not usually stored withall. +Besides, silkes, veluets, cambrickes and such like, he bought a Chaine +of Golde that cost him fiftie and seaven pounds and odde money, +whereof because he would have the mayden head or first wearing +himselfe, hee presently put it on in the Goldsmiths shop, and so +walked therewith about London, as his occasions serued. But let not +the Gentleman bee offended, who if this Booke come to his handes, can +best auouch the trueth of this discourse, if heere by the ways I blame +his rash pride, or simple credulitie: for betweene the one and other, +the Chaine hee paide so deere for about ten of the clock in the +morning, the Cunny catchers the same day ere night shared amongst +them, a matter whereat hee may well greeve and I be sorie, in respect +hee is my very good friend: but to the purpose. This Gentleman walking +in Paules, with his Chaine faire glittering about his necke, talking +with his man about some businesse: was well viewed and regarded by a +crewe of Conny-catchers, whose teeth watred at his goodly Chaine, yet +knew not how to come by it hanging as it did, and therefore entred +into secret conspiration among themselves, if they could not come by +all the Chaine, yet how they might make it lighter by halfe a score +poundes at the least. Still had they their eyes on the honest +Gentleman, who little doubted any such treason intended against his so +late bought bargaine: and they hauing laid their plot, ech one to be +assistant in this enterprise, saw when the Gentleman dismissed his +servant, to go about such affaires as hee had appointed him, himselfe +still walking there up and downe the middle Isle. One of these mates, +that stood most on his cunning in these exploytes, folowed the serving +man foorth of the Church calling him by diuers names, as John, Thomas, +William, &c. as though he had knowne his right name, but could not hit +on it: which whether he did or no I know not, but wel I wot the +seruingman turned back again, and seeing him that called him seemed a +Gentleman, booted and cloaked after the newest fashion, came with his +hat in his hand to him, saying: Sir, do ye call me? Marie doe I my +frend quoth the other, doost not thou serue such a Gentleman? and +named one as himselfe pleased. No truely Sir, answered the +seruingman, I know not any such Gentleman as you speake of. By my +troth replyed the Conny-catcher, I am assured I knew thee and thy +Maister, though now I cannot suddenly remember my selfe. The +seruingman fearing no harme, yet fitting the humour of this trecherous +companion, tolde right his Masters name whome he served, and that his +Master was even then walking in Paules. O Gods will (quoth the +Cony-catcher, repeating his masters name) a very honest Gentleman, of +such a place is he not? naming a shire of the Country: for hee must +knowe both name, Country and somtimes what Gentlemen dwell neere the +partie that is to bee over reached, ere hee can proceed. No in deede +Sir (answered the servingman, with such reverence as it had beene to +an honest Gentleman indeed) my Master is of such a place, a mile from +such a Towne, and heard by such a knights house: by which report the +deceiver was halfe instructed, because though he was ignorant of the +fellows Master, yet wel he knew the Country, and the knight named. So +crauing pardon that he had mistaken him, he returnes againe into the +Church, and the servingman trudgeth about his assigned busines. Being +come to the rest of the crew, he appointes one of them (whome he knew +to be expert in deed), to take this matter in hand, for him self might +not do it, least the servingman should return and know him, he +schooled the rest likewise what euery man should do when the pinch +came, and changing his cloke with one of his fellowes, walked by +himselfe attending the feate: and every one being as ready, the +apointed fellow makes his sally foorth, and comming to the Gentleman, +calling him by his name, giues him the courtesie and embrace, likewise +thanking him for good choere he had at his house, which he did with +such seemly behaviour & protestation, as the Gentleman (thinking the +other to be no lesse) used like action of kindenesse to him. Now as +Country Gentlemen haue many visiters both with neere dwelling +neighbours, and freends that iourney from farre, whom they can hardly +remember, but some principall one that servus as countenance to the +other: so hee not discrediting the cunning mates words, who still at +every point alleaged his kinred to the knight neighbor to the +Gentleman, which the poore serving man had (doubting no ill) reuealed +before, and that both there and at his owne house in hawking time with +that knight and other Gentlemen of the countrey he had liberally +tasted his kindnes: desiring pardon that he had forgotten him, and +offered him the curtesie of the citie. The Conny-catcher excused +himselfe for that time, saying, at their next meeting hee would bestow +it on him. Then seeming to have espyed his chaine, and commending the +fairenes and woorkemanship thereof: saies, I pray ye sir take a litle +counsel of a friend, it may be you will returne thankes for it. I +wonder quoth he, you dare weare such a costly Jewell so open in sight, +which is euen but a baite to entice bad men to adventure time and +place for it, and no where sooner then in this cittie, where (I may +say to you) are such a number of Connycatchers, Cossoners and such +like, that a man can scarecly koepe any thing from them, they have so +many reaches and sleights to beguile withall: which a very especiall +freend of mine found too true not manye dayes since. Weereupon he +tolde a very solemne tale, of villanies and knaveries in his own +profession, whereby he reported his freeend had lost a watch of gold; +shewing how closely his friend wore it in his bosome, and howe +straungely it was gotten from him, that the gentleman by that +discourse wared halfe affraid of his chaine. And giving him many +thankes for his good warning, presently takes the Chaine from about +his necke, and tying it up fast in a handkercher put it up into his +sleeue saying. If the Conny-catcher get it heere, let him not spare +it. Not a little did the tretcher smile in his sleeue, hearing the +rashe securitie, but in deede simplicitie of the Gentleman, and no +sooner sawe he it put vp, but presently he counted it sure his owne, +by the assistance of his complices, that lay in an ambuscado for the +purpose: with embraces and courtesies on either side, the +Conny-catcher departs, leaving the gentleman walking there still: +whereat the crewe were not a little offended, that he still kept in +the Church, and would not goe abroad. Well, at length (belike +remembring some businesse) the Gentleman taking leave of an other that +talked with him, hasted to go forth at the furthest west doore of +Paules, which he that had talked with him, and gave him such counsell +perceiuing, hied out of the other doore, and got to the entrance ere +hee came foorth, the rest following the gentleman at an inche. As hee +was stepping out, the other stept in, and let fall a key, hauing his +hat so low ouer his eyes, that he could not well discerne his face, +and stooping to take up the keye, kept the Gentleman from going +backward or forward, by reason his legge was ouer the threshold. The +formost Conny-catcher behind, pretending a quarrell vnto him that +stooped, rapping out an oth, and drawing his dagger, saide: Doe I +meete the villaine? Nay, he shall not scape me now, and so made offer +to strike him. + +The gentleman at his standing up, seeing it was he that gaue him such +good counsaile, and pretended himselfe his verie friend, but neuer +imagining this traine was made for him: stept in his defence, when the +other following tript vp his heeles: so that hee and his counsellour +were downe together, and two more uppon them, striking with their +daggers verie eagerly, marry indeed the gentleman had most of the +blowes, and both his handkercher with the chaine, and also his pursse +with three and fiftie shillings in it, were taken out of his pocket in +this strugling, euen by then man that himself defended. + +It was maruellous to behold, how not regarding the Villaines wordes +uttered before in the Church, nor thinking uppon the charge about him +(which after hee had thus treacherouslye lost unwittingly): he stands +pacifiyng them that were not discontented, but onely to beguile +him. But they vowing that they would presently go for their weapons, +and so to the field, told the Gentleman he laboured but in vaine, for +fight they must and would, and so going downe by Paules Chaine, left +the gentleman made a Conny going up toward Fleet-street, sorry for his +new Counseller and freend, and wishing him good lucke in the fight: +which in deede was with nothing but wine pots, for ioy of their late +gotten bootie. Neere to Saint Dunstones church the Gentleman remembred +himself, and feeling his pocket so light had suddenly more greefe at +his hart, then euer happen to him or any man againe. Backe he comes to +see if hee could espye anye of them, but they were farre inoughe from +him: God send him better hap when he goes next a wooing, and that this +his losse may bee a warning to others. + +How a cunning knaue got a Truncke well stuffed with linen and certaine +parcels of plate out of a Cittizens house, and how the Master of the +house holpe the deceiuer to carry away his owne goods. + +Within the Cittie of London, dwelleth a worldly man, who hath very +great dealing in his trade, and his shoppe very well frequented with +customers: had such a shrewd mischance of late by a Conny-catcher, as +may well serue for an example to others least they haue the like. A +cunning villaine, that had long time haunted this Cittizens house, and +gotten many a cheat which he carryed away safely: made it his custome +when hee wanted money, to helpe him selfe euer where hee had so often, +diuers things he had which were neuer mist, especially such as +appertained to the Cittizens trade, but when anye were found wanting, +they could not deuise which way they were gone, so pollitiquely this +fellow alwayes behaued himselfe, well knew hee what times of greatest +businesse this Cittizen had in his trade, and when the shop is moft +stored with Chapmen: then would he step up the stares (for there was +and is another doore to the house besides that which entreth into the +shoppe) and what was next hand came euer away with. One time above the +rest, in an evening about Candlemas, when day light shuts in about +five of the clocke, hee watched to doe some feate in the house, and +seeing the mistresse goe foorth with her maide, the goodman and his +folkes very busie in the shop: up the staires he goes as he was wonte +to doo, and lifting up the latch of the hall portall doore, saw no +body neere to trouble him, when stepping into the next chamber, where +the Cittizen and his Wife usually lay, at the beds feete there stood a +handsome truncke, wherein was verye good linnen, a faire gilte Salte, +two silver French bowles for Wine, two silver drinking pots, a stone +Jugge covered with silver, and a doosen of silver spoones. This +truncke hee brings to the stayres head, and making fast the doore, +againe, drawes it downe the steppes so softlye as hee could, for it +was so bigge and heavy, as he could not easilie carry it, hauing it +out at the doore, unseene of anye neighbour or any body else, he stood +strugling with it to lift it up on the stall, which by reason of the +weight trobled him very much. The goodman comming foorth of his shop, +to bid a customer or two farwell, made the fellowe affraide he should +now bee taken for all togither: but calling his wittes together to +escape if he could, he stoode gazing up at the signe belonging to the +house, as though hee were desirous to know what signe it was: which +the Cittizen perceiving, came to him and asked him what he sought for? +I looke for the signe of the blew bell sir, quoth the fellowe, where a +gentleman hauing taken a chamber for this tearme time, hath sent me +hether with this his Troncke of apparrell: quoth the Citizen I know no +such signe in this street, but in the next (naming it) there is such a +one indeed, and there dwelleth one that letteth foorth Chambers to +Gentlemen. Truly sir quoth the fellowe, thats the house I should goe +to, I pray you sir lend me your hand, but to help the Trunck on my +back, for I thinking to ease me a while vpon your stall, set it +shorte, and now I can hardly get it vp againe. The Cittizen not +knowing his owne Trunke, but indeede neuer thinking on any such +notable deceite: helps him vp with the Trunke, and so sends him away +roundly with his owne goods. When the Truncke was mist, I leaue to +your conceits what housholde greefe there was on all sides, especially +the goodman himselfe, who remembring how he helpt the fellow vp with a +Trunke, perceiued that heereby hee had beguiled himselfe, and loste +more then in haste hee should recouer againe. Howe this may admonish +others, I leaue to the iudgement of the indifferent opinion, that see +when honest meaning is so craftily beleagerd, as good foresight must +bee vsed to preuent such daungers. + +How a Broker was cunningly ouer-reached by as craftie a knaue as +himselfe, and brought in danger of the Gallowes. + +It hath beene vsed as a common by-word, a craftie knaue needeth no +Broker, whereby it should appeare that there can hardlie bee a +craftier knaue than a Broker. Suspend your iudgements till you haue +heard this Discourse ensuing, and then as you please, censure both the +one and the other. + +A Ladie of the Countrie sent vp a seruant whome she might well put in +trust, to prouide hir of a gowne answerable to such directions as she +had giuen him, which was of good price, as may appear by the outside +and lace, whereto doubtlesse was euerie other thing agreeable: for the +Tayler had seuenteen yards of the best black satten could be got for +monie, and so much golde lace, beside spangles, as valued thirteene +pound, what else was beside I know not, but let it suffice, thus much +was lost, and therefore let vs to the manner bow. + +The satten and the lace being brought to the Tayler that should make +the gowne, and spread abroade on the shop boord to be measured, +certaine good fellowes of the Conny-catching profession chanced to go +by, who seeing so rich lace, and so excellent good satten, began to +commune with themselues how they might make some purchase of what they +had seene: and quickly it was to bee done or not at al. As euer in a +crew of this quality, there is some one more ingenious and politique +then the rest, or at least wise that couets to make himselfe more +famous then the rest: so this instant was there one in this companie +that did sweare his cunning should deepelie deceiue him, but he would +haue both the lace and satten, When hauing laid the plot with his +companions, how and which waie their helpe might stand them in stead, +this they proceeded. + +Well noted they the seruing-man that stood in the shoppe with the +Tailer, and gathered by his diligent attendance, that he had some +charge of the gowne there to be made, wherefore by him must they worke +their trecherie intended, and vse him as an instrument to beguile +himselfe. One of them sitting in a seate nere vnto the Tailers stall, +could easily heare the talke that passed betweene the seruing-man and +the Tayler, where among other communication, it was concluded that the +gowne should be made of the selfe same fashion in euery point, as +another Ladies was who then lay in the citie, and that measure being +taken by her, the same would sirlie serue the Lady for whome the gowne +was to bee made: now the seruingman intended to go speake with the +Ladie, and uppon a token agreed betweene them (which he careleslie +spake so lowd, that the Conny-catcher heard it) he would as her +leisure serued, certifie that Tailer, and he should bring the stuffe +with him, to haue the Ladies opinion both of the one and the other. + +The seruingman being gone about his affaires, the subtill mate that +has listned to all their talke, acquaints his fellows both with the +determination and token appointed for the Tailers comming to the +Lady. The guide and leader to all the rest for villany, though there +was no one but was better skilde in such matters then honestie: he +appoints that one of them should go to the tauerne, which was not +farre off, & laying two fagots on the fire in a roome by himselfe, and +a quarte of wine filled for countenance of the treacherie: another of +that crue should giue atteudance on him, as if hee were his maister, +being bare headed, and sir humblie answering at euery word. To the +tauern goes this counterfet gentleman, and his seruant waiting on him, +where euery thing was performed as us before rehearsed. When the +master knaue calling the drawer, demanded if there dwelt neere at hand +a skillfull Tailer, that could make a suite of veluet for himselfe, +marry it was to be doone with very great speed. + +The Drawer named the Tailer that we now speake of, & upon the drawers +commending his cunning, the man in all hast was sent for to a +gentleman, for who he must make a sute of veluet foorthwith. Upon +talke had of the stuffe, how much was to be bought of everything +appertayning thereto: he must immediatly take measure of this +counterfet gentleman, because he knew not when to returne that waye +againe, afterward they would go to the Mercers. As the Tailer was +taking measure on him bare headed, as if he had bin a substantiall +gentleman indeed, the craftie mate had cunningly gotten his pursse out +of his pocket, at the one string whereof was fastened a little key, +and at the other his signet ring: This bootie he was sure of all +readie, whether he should get any thing els or no of the mischiefe +intended, stepping to the window he cuts the ring from the pursse, and +by his supposed man (rounding him in the eare) sendes it to the +plot-layer of this knauerie, minding to traine the tailer along with +him, as it were to the mercers, while he the meane time tooke order +for the other matter. Afterward speaking alowde to his man, Sirrha, +quoth hee, dispatch what I bad you, and about foure of the clock meet +me in Paules, by that time I hope the tailer and I shall have +dispacht. To Cheapside goeth the honest Tailer with this notorious +dissembler, not missing his pursse for the space of two houres after, +in lesse then halfe which time the satten and golde lace was gotten +likewise by the other villain from the Taylers house in this order. + +Being sure the Tayler should bee kept absent, hee sends another mate +home to his house, who abused his servants with this devise: that the +ladies man had met their master abroad, and had him to the other Ladie +to take measure of her, and least they should delaye the time too +long, hee was sent for the satten and lace, declaring the token +appointed, and with all giving their masters signet ring for better +confirmation of his message, The servants could doe no lesse then +deliuer it, being commanded (as they supposed) by so credible +testimony: neither did the leasure of anie one serue to goe with the +the messenger, who seemed an honest young Gentleman and carried no +cause of distrust in his countenance: wherefore they delivered him the +lace and satten folded up together as it was, and desired him to will +their master to make some speede home, both for cutting out of worke, +and other occassions. + +To a Broker fit for their purpose, goes this deceiuer with the satten +lace, who knowing well they could not come honestly by it, nor anie +thing else hee bought of that crew, as often before he had dealt much +with them: either gaue them not so much as they would haue, or at +least as they iudged they could haue in another place, for which the +ring-leader of this coosnage, vowed in his mind to be reuenged on the +Broker. The master knaue who had spent two houres and more in vaine +with the Tailer, and would not like of anie veluet he saw, when he +percieued that he mist his purse, and could not deuise how or where he +had lost it, shewed himselfe verie sorrie for his mishap, and said in +the morning he would send the veluet home to his house, for he knew +where to speed of better then anie he had seene in the shops. Home +goes the Tailer verie sadly, where he was entertained with a greater +mischance, for there was the Ladies seruing-man swearing and stamping, +that he had not seen their master since the morning they parted, +neither had hee sent for the satten and lace, but when the seruantes +insisted their innocencie, beguiled both with the true token +rehearsed, and their masters ring, it exceedeth my cunning to set +downe answerable wordes to this exceeding griefe and amazement on +their part, but most of al the honest Tailer, who sped the better by +the Brokers wilfulnes, as afterward it happened, which made him the +better brooke the losse of his purse. That night all means were used +that could bee, both to the Mercers, brokers, goldsmiths, goldfiners, +& such like, where happily such things doe come to bee solde: but all +was in vaine, the onely helpe came by the inuenter of this villanie, +who scant sleeping all night, in regard of the brokers extreme +gaining, both by him and those of his profession: the next morning he +came to the Tailers house, at what time hee espied him with the Ladies +seruing-man, comming forth of the doores, and into the tauern he went +to report what a mishap hee had upon the sending for him thether the +daie before. + +As he was but newly entered his sadde discourie, in comes the partie +offended with the broker, and hauing heard all (whereof none could +make better report than himselfe) he takes the tailer and seruing-man +aside, and pretending great griefe for both their causes, demands what +they would thinke him worthy of that could help them to their good +againe. On condition to meete with such a friend, offer was made of +fiue pound, and after sundrie speeches passing between them alone, be +seeming that he would would worke the recouerie thereof by arte, and +they premising not to disclose the man that did the good, he drew +forth a little booke out of his bosome, whether it was latine or +english it skilled not, for hee could not reade a word on it, then +desiring them to spare him alone a while, they shoulde perceiue what +hee woulde doe for them. Their heartes encouraged with some good hope, +kept all his wordes secret to themselues: and not long had they sitten +absent out of the roome, but he called them in againe and seeming as +though he had been a scholler in deed, sayd he found by his figure +that a broker in such a place had their goods lost, and in such a +place of the house they should finde it, bidding them go thether with +all speed, and as they found his wordes, so (with referring to +themselues how they came to knowledge therof) to meet him there againe +in the euening, and reward him as he had deserued. + +Awaie in hast goes the Tailor and the seruing-man, and entering the +house with the Constable, found them in the place where hee that +reueald it, knew the broker alwaie laid such gotten goods. Of their +ioy againe, I leaue you to coniecture, and thinke you see the broker +with a good paire of bolts on his heele, readie to take his farewell +of the worlde in a halter, when time shall serue. The counterfet +cunning man, and artificial conny-catcher, as I heard, was paide his +fiue poundes that night. Thus one craftie knaue beguiled another, let +each take heed of dealing with anie such kind of people. + +FINIS. + +[Illustration] + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Third And Last Part Of +Conny-Catching. (1592), by R. G. + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 14462 *** |