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+The Project Gutenberg eBook, Poise: How to Attain It, by D. Starke,
+Translated by Francis Medhurst
+
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+
+
+
+Title: Poise: How to Attain It
+
+Author: D. Starke
+
+Release Date: October 26, 2004  [eBook #13877]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-646-US (US-ASCII)
+
+
+***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK POISE: HOW TO ATTAIN IT***
+
+
+Mental Efficiency Series
+
+POISE: HOW TO ATTAIN IT
+
+by
+
+D. STARKE
+
+Translated by Francis Medhurst, D.Litt.
+
+1916
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+"POISE IS A POWER DERIVED FROM THE MASTERY OF SELF"
+
+
+
+
+PREFACE
+
+
+All efforts directed toward the correcting of temperamental or mental
+blemishes or defects and nervous conditions are of benefit to humanity.
+In producing this book the Author's purpose was to help mankind to
+overcome these weaknesses, which are a serious impediment to mental
+development, and hinder personal advancement and general progress. The
+aim of the Publishers in issuing this translation is to put into the
+hands of those who wish to overcome their failings, become masters of
+themselves, and command the attention and respect of others, a work that
+has been thoroughly tested abroad and one that will be found of
+exceptional service in attaining the end in view--the securing of a
+perfect balance.
+
+This book is written in two parts. The first points to the need of Poise
+in daily life, indicates the obstacles to be overcome, and discusses the
+effects of Poise on personal efficiency. The second instructs the reader
+how to secure that evenness of temperament which is the chief
+characteristic of Poise. It includes, in addition, a series of practical
+physical exercises to be used in acquiring Poise.
+
+If such a work as this is to do good, if the reader really wishes to
+benefit by the advice that it gives him, it must be read thoughtfully
+and diligently, not fitfully and forgetfully, and the reader most
+steadfastly keep before him the maxim of the Author--"Poise is a power
+derived from the Mastery of Self."
+
+THE PUBLISHERS.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+Preface
+
+PART ONE
+POISE: ITS NEED, ITS ENEMIES, ITS EFFECT
+
+    I. The Need of Poise in Life
+   II. The Enemies of Poise
+  III. War on Timidity
+
+PART TWO
+HOW TO ACQUIRE POISE
+
+    I. Modesty and Effrontery Contrasted
+   II. Physical Exercises to Acquire Poise
+  III. Four Series of Physical Exercises
+   IV. Practical Exercises for Obtaining Poise
+    V. The Supreme Achievement
+
+
+
+
+PART I
+
+POISE: ITS NEED, ITS ENEMIES, ITS EFFECT
+
+
+CHAPTER I
+
+THE NEED OF POISE IN LIFE
+
+
+Lack of poise has always been an obstacle to those who are imbued with
+the desire to succeed.
+
+In every age the awkwardness born of timidity has served to keep back
+those who suffered from it, but this defect has never been so great a
+drawback as in the life of to-day.
+
+The celebrated phrase of the ancient Roman writer who said, "Fortune
+smiles on the brave," could very well serve as our motto nowadays, with
+this slight alteration: "Fortune smiles on those who are possest of
+poise."
+
+At this point let us attempt an exact definition of poise.
+
+It is a quality which enables us to judge of our own value, and which,
+in revealing to us the knowledge of the things of which we are really
+capable, gives us at the same time the desire to accomplish them.
+
+It is not a quality wholly simple. On the contrary, it is a composite of
+many others all of which take part in the molding of that totality which
+bears the name of poise.
+
+It may be well to pass in review the principal qualities of which it is
+composed, that one may characterize as follows:
+
+Will.
+
+Reason.
+
+Knowledge of one's own value.
+
+Correctness of judgment.
+
+Sincerity toward oneself.
+
+The power of resisting the appeals of self-love.
+
+Contempt of adverse criticism.
+
+Pride that is free from vanity.
+
+A definite and clearly conceived ambition.
+
+Will, as is well known, is the pivot of all our resolutions, whether the
+question for the moment be how to form them or how to keep them when
+formed.
+
+A man without will-power is a straw, blown about by every wind and
+carried, whether he will or no, into situations in which he has no valid
+reason for finding himself.
+
+Without the will-power which enables us to take a firm hold of ourselves
+and to get a grip upon our impressions, they will remain vague and
+nebulous without presenting to us characters of sufficient definiteness
+to enable us to direct them readily into the proper channels.
+
+It is will-power which gives us the force to maintain a resolution which
+will lead us to the hoped-for goal of success.
+
+It is will-power also which enables us to correct the faults which stand
+in the way of the acquiring of poise.
+
+We are not now speaking of those idle fancies which are no more than
+manifestations of nervousness. We have in mind rather that controlled
+and enduring purpose which arms the heart against the assaults of the
+emotions by giving it the strength to overcome them.
+
+There are many cases even in which will-power has led to their entire
+suppression.
+
+This happens more particularly in the case of those artificial emotions
+that the man of resolution ignores completely, but which cause agony to
+the timid who do not know how to escape them, and exaggerate them to
+excess.
+
+This abnormal development of their personalities is the peculiarity of
+the timid, which their fitful efforts of will only heighten, alienating
+from them the sympathy which might be of assistance to them.
+
+They take refuge in a species of mischievous and fruitless activity,
+leaving the field open to the development of all sorts of imaginary ills
+that argument does not serve to combat.
+
+Their ego, whose importance is in no way counterbalanced by their
+appreciation of the friends they keep at a distance, fills their entire
+existence to such an extent that they have no doubt whatever that, when
+they are in public, every eye is, of necessity, fixt upon them.
+
+Their negative will leaves them at the mercy of every sort of emotion,
+which, in arousing in them the necessity of a reaction they feel
+themselves powerless to realize, reduces them to a state of inferiority
+that, when it becomes known, is the source of grave embarrassment to
+them.
+
+The power of will which sustains those who wish to acquire the habit of
+poise is, then, the capacity to accomplish acts solely because one has
+the ardent desire to achieve them.
+
+We are now speaking, understand, neither of extreme heroism or of
+impossibilities.
+
+Another point presents itself here. Willpower, in order to preserve its
+energy, must be sustained and fixt. At this price alone can we achieve
+poise. We must, therefore, thoroughly saturate ourselves with this
+principle: Reasoning-power is an essential element in the upbuilding of
+poise.
+
+It is reasoning-power which teaches us to distinguish between those
+things that we must be careful to avoid and those which are part and
+parcel of the domain of exaggeration and fantasy.
+
+It is also by means of reasoning that we arrive at the proper
+appreciation of the just mean that we must observe. It is by its aid
+that we are enabled to disentangle those impulses that will prove
+profitable from a chaos of useless risks.
+
+It is always by virtue of deductions depending upon reason that we are
+able to adopt a resolution or to maintain an attitude that we believe to
+be correct, while preserving our self-possession under circumstances in
+which persons of a timorous disposition would certainly lose their
+heads.
+
+Those who know how to reason never expose themselves to the possibility
+of being unhorsed by fate for lack of good reasons for strengthening
+themselves in their chosen course.
+
+They adhere, in the very heat of discussion and in spite of the
+onslaughts of destiny, to the line of conduct that sage reflection has
+taught them to adopt and are more than careful never to abandon it
+except for the most valid reasons.
+
+They never stray into the byways in which the timid and the shrinking
+constantly wander without sufficient thought of the goal toward which
+they are journeying.
+
+They know where they are going, and if, now and again, they ask for
+information about the road that remains to be traveled, it is with no
+intention of changing their course, but simply so as not to miss the
+short cuts and to lose nothing of the pleasures of the scenes through
+which they may pass.
+
+Reasoning-power is the trade-mark of superior minds. Mediocre natures
+take no interest in it and, as we have seen, the timid are incapable of
+it, except in so far as it follows the beaten path.
+
+True poise never is guided by anything but reason. Certain risks can
+never be undertaken save after ripe deliberation.
+
+Confusion is never the fate of those who are resolved on a definite line
+of conduct.
+
+Such people are careful to plumb the questions with which they have to
+grapple and to weigh the inconveniences and the advantages of the acts
+they have the desire to accomplish.
+
+When their decision is once made, however, nothing will prevent the
+completion of the work they have begun. Such people are ripe for
+success.
+
+The knowledge of one's real worth is a quality doubly precious when
+contrasted with the fact that the majority of people are more than
+indulgent to their own failings. Of many of them it may be said, in the
+words of the Arab proverb, couched in the language of imagery: "This man
+has no money, but in his pocket everything turns to gold."
+
+This saying, divested of the language of hyperbole, means simply that
+the man in question is so obsessed with the greatness of his own
+personal value that he exaggerates the importance of everything that
+concerns him.
+
+This condition is a much more common one than one might at first
+believe. Many an occurrence which, when it happens to some one else,
+seems to us quite devoid of interest, becomes, when it directly affects
+us, a matter to compel the attention of others, to the extent that we
+find ourselves chilled and disappointed when we discover that we are the
+victims of that indifference which we were prepared to exhibit toward
+other people under similar circumstances.
+
+The consciousness of our own worth must not be confounded with that
+adoration of self which transforms poise into egotism.
+
+It is a good thing to know one's own powers sufficiently well to
+undertake only such tasks as are certainly within the scope of one's
+abilities.
+
+To believe oneself more capable than one really is, is a fault that is
+far too common. It is, nevertheless, less harmful in the long run than
+the failing which is its exact antithesis. Lack of confidence in one's
+own powers is the source of every kind of feebleness and of all
+unsuccess.
+
+It is for this reason that poise never can exist without another
+quality, that correctness of judgment which, in giving us the breadth of
+mind to know exactly how much we are capable of, permits us to undertake
+our tasks without boasting and without hesitation.
+
+Soundness of judgment is the faculty of being able to appreciate the
+merits of our neighbors without cherishing any illusions as to our own,
+and of being able to do this so exactly that we can with assurance carry
+out to its end any undertaking, knowing that the result must be, barring
+accidents, precisely what we have foreseen.
+
+This being the case, what possible reason can we have for depreciating
+ourselves or for lacking poise?
+
+Timid people suffer without recognizing their own defects in the matter
+of insight.
+
+They torture themselves by building their judgments upon indications and
+not upon facts.
+
+If the perception of a man of resolution causes him to understand at
+once the emptiness of criticisms based on envy or spleen, the timid man,
+always ready to seize upon anything that can be possibly construed into
+an appearance of ridicule directed against himself, will give up a
+project that he hears criticized without stopping to weigh the value of
+the arguments advanced.
+
+Far from arguing the question out, or attempting a rebuttal, he never
+even dreams of it. The very thought of a contest, however courteously it
+may be conducted, frightening him to such an extent that he loses all
+his ideas.
+
+The unfortunate shrinking which characterizes him makes him an easy prey
+for people of exaggerated enthusiasms as well as to quick
+disillusionment.
+
+A token of apparent sympathy touches him so profoundly that he does not
+wait to estimate its value and to decide whether it be sincere or not.
+
+He passes in a moment from careless gaiety to the blackest despair if he
+imagines that he has observed even the appearance of an unsympathetic
+gesture.
+
+He does not need to be sure, to be miserable. It is enough for him if
+the circumstances that he thought favorable become seemingly hostile and
+antagonistic.
+
+How utterly different is the attitude of the man who is endowed with
+poise!
+
+His firmness of soul saves him from unconsidered enthusiasms and he
+jealously preserves his control in the presence of excessive
+protestations as well as when confronting indications of aimless
+antagonism.
+
+How can such a man as this possibly fail to form a correct judgment and
+to benefit by all the qualities that depend upon it?
+
+Absolute sincerity toward oneself is one of the forms of sound judgment.
+
+Without indulging in excessive modesty, it is a good thing to endeavor
+to become intimately acquainted with one's aptitudes and one's failings,
+and to admit the latter with the utmost frankness in order to set about
+the work of correcting them.
+
+It is also necessary to know exactly what sort of territory it is in
+which one is taking one's risks.
+
+The world of affairs, whatever these last may happen to be, may be
+likened to a vast preserve containing traps for wild beasts.
+
+The man who wishes to walk in such a place without coming to harm will,
+first of all, make a careful study of the ground for the purpose of
+avoiding the traps and pitfalls that may engulf him or wound him as he
+passes.
+
+Just as soon as he has located these dangers his step becomes firm and
+he can advance with a tranquil gait and head upraised along the paths
+which he knows do not conceal any dangerous surprizes.
+
+These are the pitfalls that most frequently threaten that daring that we
+sometimes find in the timid.
+
+Their very defects preventing them from making proper comparisons, they
+are altogether too prone to ignore their faults and to magnify their
+virtues and so fall an easy prey to the designer and the sharper.
+
+Their very carelessness in estimating other people becomes the
+foundation of an involuntary partiality the moment they are called upon
+to judge their own actions.
+
+It is not deliberate self-indulgence that drives them to act in this
+way, but their inexperience, which gives rise in them to the desire for
+perfection, and this necessarily provokes, simultaneously with the
+despair caused by their failure to attain it, a fear of having this
+failure remarked or commented upon.
+
+The man who possesses poise is too familiar with the realities of life
+not to be aware that the search for such an ideal is a Utopian dream.
+
+But he is also aware that, if actual perfection does not exist, it is
+the bounden duty of man to struggle always in pursuit of good and to
+show appreciation of it in whatsoever form it may manifest itself.
+
+Sincerity toward himself thus becomes for him an easy matter indeed, and
+for the very reason that his poise leaves him absolutely free to form a
+correct estimate of others.
+
+Serious self-examination throws a clear light for him upon those merits
+of which he has a right to be proud, while revealing to him at the same
+time the faults to which he is most likely to yield.
+
+The habit of estimating himself and his own qualities without fear or
+favor gives him great facility for gaging the motives of other people.
+
+He thus avoids the pitfalls that a biased viewpoint spreads before the
+feet of the foolish, and at the same time represses that feeling of
+vanity which might lead him to believe that he is altogether too clever
+to fall into them.
+
+He watches himself constantly to avoid getting into the bypaths which he
+sees with sorrow that others are following, and does not fail to
+estimate accurately the value of the victories he achieves over himself
+as well as over the duplicity of most of the people who surround him.
+
+And this superiority is what makes certain his poise. More difficult
+perhaps than anything else to acquire is the power to resist the appeals
+of one's own self-love.
+
+We will explain this later at greater length. Lack of poise is often due
+to nothing so much as an excess of vanity which throws one back upon
+oneself from the fear of not being able to shine in the front rank.
+
+Such a person does not say to himself: "I will conquer this place by
+sheer merit." He contents himself with envying those who occupy it,
+quite neglecting to put forth the efforts which would place him there
+beside them.
+
+There is nothing worse than yielding to an exaggerated tenderness toward
+ourselves, which, by magnifying our merits in our own eyes, frequently
+leads us to make attempts which result in failure and expose us to
+ridicule.
+
+This is a most frequent cause of making an inveterate coward of one who
+is subject to occasional attacks of timidity.
+
+To know one's limitations exactly and never to allow oneself to exceed
+them--this is the part of wisdom, the act of a man who, as the saying
+goes, knows what he is about.
+
+There is in every effort a necessary limit that it is not wise to
+exceed.
+
+"Never force your talents," says a very pithy proverb. Never undertake
+to do a thing that is beyond your powers.
+
+Never allow yourself to be drawn into a discussion on a subject which is
+beyond your intellectual depth. To do so is to take the risk of making
+mistakes that will render you ridiculous.
+
+But if you are quite convinced that you can come out victorious, never
+hesitate to enter a trial of wits that may serve as an occasion for
+demonstrating the fact that you are sure of your subject.
+
+The man who cultivates poise will never let pass such opportunities as
+this for exhibiting himself in a favorable light.
+
+Conscious of the soundness of his own judgment, and filled with a real
+sincerity toward himself, he will not allow himself to be carried away
+by a possible chance of success. Rather will he gather himself together,
+collect his forces, and wait until he can achieve a real effect upon the
+minds of those whom he wishes to impress.
+
+Similarly the result of unsuccess in such a venture is obvious. It has
+the effect of developing a distrust of oneself and of destroying the
+superb assurance of those people of whom it is often said: "Oh, he! He
+is sailing with the wind at his back!"
+
+People generally fail to add in these cases that such persons have left
+nothing undone to accomplish this result and are more than careful not
+to weigh anchor when the wind is not favorable.
+
+It is true enough that there can be no actual shelter from a storm, but
+the mariner who is prepared is able to ride it out without appreciable
+damage, while those who are not prepared generally founder on account of
+their poor seamanship.
+
+Disregard of calumny is always the index of a noble spirit.
+
+The man who wastes time over such indignities and who allows himself to
+be affected by them is not of the stature that insures victory in the
+struggle.
+
+Minds of large caliber disdain these manifestations of futile jealousy.
+
+People of obscurity are never vilified. Only those whose merits have
+placed them in the limelight are the targets for the attacks of envy and
+for the slanders of falsehood.
+
+A precept that has often been enunciated, and can not be too often
+repeated, which should, indeed, be inscribed in letters of gold over the
+doors of every institution where men meet together, runs as follows:
+"Envy and malice are nothing more than homage rendered to superiority."
+
+Only those who occupy an enviable position can become objects of
+calumny.
+
+Such calumny is always the work of the unworthy, who think to advertise
+their own merits by denying those of better men.
+
+Men of resolution under such circumstances simply shrug their shoulders
+and pass by.
+
+The rest, those who are enslaved by timidity, become confused.
+
+Their ego, which they cultivated in a fashion at once obscure and
+absolute, becomes so profoundly affected that they lack all courage to
+openly defend it.
+
+Moreover, that instinctive need of sympathy, which is so marked a
+characteristic of the timid, is deeply wounded, while their chronic fear
+of disapprobation is strengthened by the criticisms spread abroad.
+
+The illogicality of these sentiments is obvious. The man who is timid
+shuns society, yet nevertheless the judgments of this same society are
+for him a question of absorbing interest. Timidity is, in effect, a
+disease of many forms, every one of which is founded upon illogicality.
+
+It is always a mental weakness. It is sometimes vanity, but never pride,
+that reasonable pride that a philosophy now abandoned once numbered as
+one of the principal vices, and which, if rightly estimated, can be
+considered as the motive power of every noble action.
+
+Pride is a force. It is therefore a virtue which must of necessity be
+one of the components of poise, so long as it contains within it no
+seeds of vanity. Under such circumstances it is a primal condition of
+success in the achievement of poise. Pride must, however, be free from
+vanity, otherwise it ceases to be a force and becomes a cause of
+deterioration.
+
+As a matter of fact, those who are conceited are always the dupes of
+their own desire to bulk largely in the minds of others, and at the mere
+thought that they will not shine as they have hoped to do the majority
+of them are put entirely out of countenance and are quite at a loss for
+means of expression.
+
+The inevitable result of this tendency is to drive them into association
+with mediocrity. In such a society alone will the vain find themselves
+at their ease. But the very moment that they find themselves in the
+presence of those who are their superiors, the fear of not being able to
+occupy the front rank throws them into such a state of mental disarray
+that they entirely lose their assurance and that appearance of poise by
+whose aid they are often able to deceive others.
+
+Finally, one of the most solid elements of poise is, without doubt, a
+well-defined ambition, that is to say, one that is divested of the
+drawbacks of frivolity and directly winged toward the goal of one's
+hopes.
+
+The man who possesses ambition of this kind is certainly destined to
+acquire, if he has not already acquired it, that poise which is
+absolutely necessary to him in order to make his way in the world.
+
+He will neither be pretentious nor timorous, exaggerated nor fearful. He
+will go forward without hesitation toward the goal which he knows to be
+before him, and will make, without any apologies, those detours which
+seem to him necessary to the success of his undertaking, without paying
+any attention to the fruitless distractions that make victims of the
+rash.
+
+He will not have to put up with the affront of being refused, for he
+will ask aid only of those persons who, for various reasons, he is
+practically sure will be of assistance to him. The knowledge of his own
+deserts, while keeping him in the position he has attained, will prevent
+him from being satisfied in commonplace surroundings, and his will-power
+will always maintain him at the level he has reached, permitting him no
+latitude save that of exceeding it.
+
+Such is true poise, not that whose spirit one violates by merely
+associating it with the incapable, the pretentious, or the extravagant,
+but that which is at once the motive power and the inspiration of all
+the actions of those who, in their determination to force their way
+through the great modern struggle for existence, perseveringly follow a
+line of conduct that they have worked out for themselves in advance.
+
+Ignoring such enterprises as they know to be unworthy of their powers,
+those who are possest of real poise (and not of that foolish temerity
+colloquially known as _bluff_) will devote themselves solely to such
+tasks as a well-ordered judgment and an accurate knowledge of their own
+potentialities indicate to them to be fitting.
+
+Does this mean that they will succeed in every case?
+
+Unfortunately, no! But such of them as have met with temporary failure,
+if they are able to assure themselves that their lack of success has
+been due neither to a failure of will-power nor a fear of ridicule, will
+return to the charge, once more prepared to make headway against
+circumstances which they have the poise to foresee, and which they will
+at least render incapable of harming them, even if they lack the
+necessary force to dominate them completely to their own advantage.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II
+
+THE ENEMIES OF POISE
+
+
+The enemies of poise are many and of different origins, both of feeling
+and of impulse.
+
+They all tend, however, toward the same result, the cessation of effort
+under pretexts more or less specious.
+
+It is of no use deceiving ourselves. Lack of poise has its roots deep in
+all the faults which are caused by apathy and purposeless variety.
+
+We have learned in the previous chapter how greatly the vice of lack of
+confidence in oneself can retard the development of the quality we are
+considering.
+
+Balanced between the desire to succeed and the fear of failure, the
+timid man leads a miserable existence, tortured by unavailing regrets
+and by no less useless aspirations, which torment him like the worm that
+dieth not.
+
+Little by little the habit of physical inaction engenders a moral
+inertia and the victim learns to fly from every opportunity of escaping
+from his bondage.
+
+Very soon an habitual state of idleness takes possession of him and
+causes him to avoid everything that tends to make action necessary.
+
+The dread of responsibility that might devolve upon him turns him aside
+from every sort of endeavor, and he passes his life in a hopeless and
+sluggish inaction, from a fear of drawing down upon himself reproaches
+to which he might have to make answer or of being compelled to take part
+in discussions which would involve the disturbing of his indolent
+repose.
+
+Are we to suppose then that he finds real happiness in such a state of
+things?
+
+Certainly not, for this negative existence weighs upon him with all the
+burden of a monotony that he feels powerless to throw off. His own
+mediocrity enrages him while the success of others fills him with
+dismay.
+
+Nevertheless his weakness of character allows the hate of action to
+speak more loudly to him than legitimate ambition, and keeps him in a
+state of obvious inferiority that of itself gives birth to numberless
+new enemies, who end by destroying him utterly.
+
+He is first attacked by slowness of comprehension, the inevitable
+consequence of that idleness that causes the cowardly to shun the
+battle.
+
+Rather than combat influences from without he allows them daily to
+assume a more prominent and a more definite place in his thoughts.
+
+His hatred of action says no to all initiative and he considers that he
+has accomplished his whole duty toward society and toward himself when
+he says: "What's the use of undertaking this or that? I haven't a chance
+of succeeding and it is therefore idle to invite defeat!"
+
+So quickly does the change work that his mind, from lack of proper
+exercise, rapidly reaches the condition where it can not voluntarily
+comprehend any but the most simple affairs and goes to pieces when
+confronted with occasions that call for reflection or reasoning, which
+he considers as the hardest kind of work.
+
+It is hardly a matter for astonishment, therefore, that under these
+conditions effeminacy should take possession of a soul that has become
+the sport of all the weaknesses that are born of a desire to avoid
+exertion.
+
+We do not care to draw the picture of that case too often encountered in
+which this moral defeat becomes changed into envy, the feeling of
+bitterness against all men, the veritable hell of the man who has not
+the power to make the effort that shall free him.
+
+Mental instability is the inevitable consequence of this state of
+affairs.
+
+All brain-activity being regarded as a useless toil, the man of timidity
+never understands the depth of the questions he has not the courage to
+discuss. If he does talk of them, it is with a bias rendered all the
+more prejudiced by the fact that, instead of expressing his ideas, he
+takes refuge in fortifying his heresies with arguments of which the
+smallest discussion would demonstrate the worthlessness.
+
+This unwillingness to discuss conditions gives rise among people who are
+deficient in poise to a special form of reasoning, which causes them to
+summarize in the most hurried fashion even the gravest events, upon the
+sole consideration that they are not asked to take part in them. If, by
+any chance, they are forced to be actors in these events the least
+little incident assumes for them the most formidable proportions.
+
+It seems probable that this tendency to exaggerate everything with which
+they come in contact is due solely to egoism. It is certain at any rate
+that egoism plays a large part in it, but some portion of it is due to
+the lack of observation that characterizes all people of timidity.
+
+The mental idleness and the instability of mind that we have already
+considered render such people less inclined to consider with any degree
+of care those things which do not touch them directly.
+
+At this stage, it is no longer possible for them to feign ignorance in
+order to avoid the trouble of thinking, and they are only touched, even
+by the most personal matters, to the extent that circumstances impose
+upon them the necessity of thinking or of acting with reference to the
+subject under consideration.
+
+The idea that they can no longer avoid the resolutions which must be
+made and their fear of the consequences which may result from these
+affect them to such a profound extent that the most insignificant of
+occurrences immediately assumes for them an altogether incommensurate
+importance.
+
+This state of mind is a notable foe of poise. It is practically
+impossible for a person under such conditions to believe that any
+considerable effort he has made can have passed unperceived.
+
+This propensity to assign an exaggerated importance to personal affairs
+develops egoism, the avowed enemy of poise. An egoist necessarily
+assumes that the rest of the world attributes to his acts the importance
+he himself assigns to them.
+
+This preoccupation does not fail to upset him. It increases his
+embarrassment and the fear of not appearing in the light in which he
+wishes to be seen paralyzes him, while the dread of what other people
+may think prevents him from being himself.
+
+To this cause many otherwise inexplicable defeats must be assigned, the
+result of which is a renewed resentment against the world at large and
+an ardent desire to avoid any further exposure to the chance of failure.
+
+A case in point is the man who becomes nervous while making a speech,
+starts to stammer, and makes a lamentable failure of what began well
+enough, because he imagines that persons in the audience are making fun
+of him.
+
+He has overheard a word, or surprized a look, neither of which had any
+relation to him, but so great is his egoism that he does not dream that
+any one in the audience can be so lacking in taste as to be concerned
+with anything but himself.
+
+Had this man, in spite of his egoism, been endowed with poise, he would
+have gone along calmly, simply forcing himself to ignore all criticism
+and to impress his very critics by his attitude and his eloquence. But
+his distrust of himself, his mental instability, his habitual weakness
+of reasoning, all these enemies of poise league themselves together to
+inflict upon him a defeat, of which the memory will only aggravate his
+nervousness and his desire never to repeat such an unpleasant
+experience.
+
+For the man who has no poise there is no snatching victory from defeat.
+His feeble will-power is completely routed, and the effort involved in
+stemming the tide of adverse opinion is to him an impossibility.
+
+From dread of being carried away by the current, and feeling himself
+incapable of struggling against it, he prefers to hide himself in the
+caves along the shore, rather than to make one desperate effort to cross
+the stream.
+
+But the very isolation he seeks, in depriving him of moral support,
+increases his embarrassment.
+
+"It is not good for man to be alone," says Holy Writ. It is certainly
+deplorable, for one who desires to make his way, to find himself without
+a prop, without a counselor, and without a guide.
+
+This is the case of those timid persons who do not understand how to
+make friends for themselves.
+
+Poise, on the other hand, invites sympathy. It aids men to expand. It
+creates friends when needed, and weaves the bonds of comradeship and of
+protection without which our social fabric could not hold together.
+
+Educators should seek for inspiration in the lessons that the exigencies
+of modern life offer to the view of the observer. Excessive modesty,
+sworn enemy of poise, is, socially speaking, a fault from which young
+minds should be carefully guarded.
+
+It is the open door to all the feeblenesses which interfere with the
+development of poise.
+
+It is a mistake that it has so long been considered as a virtue.
+
+In any case, the day of extreme humility is past. This detachment from
+oneself is contrary to all the laws of progress.
+
+It is opposed to all the principles of evolution and of growth which
+should be the study of all our contemporaries, whatever their station or
+the class to which they may happen to belong.
+
+No man has the right to withdraw himself from the battle and to shirk
+his duties, while watching other people fighting to maintain the social
+equilibrium and seeking to achieve the position to which their talents
+and their attainments render them worthy to aspire.
+
+That which is too easily honored with the title of modesty is generally
+nothing more than a screen behind which conscious ineptitude conceals
+itself.
+
+It is a very easy thing to strike a disdainful attitude and to exclaim:
+"I didn't care to compete!"
+
+Do not forget that a defeat after a sanguinary combat is infinitely more
+honorable than a retreat in which not a blow is struck.
+
+Moreover, the combats of the mind temper the soul, just as those of the
+body fortify the flesh, by making both fit for the victory that is to
+be.
+
+It is then against the enemies of poise that we must go forth to war.
+
+Cowardice must be hunted down, wherever we encounter it, because its
+victims are thrown into the struggle of life burdened with an undeniable
+inferiority.
+
+Even if they are worth while no one will be found to observe it, since
+their lack of poise always turns them back upon themselves, and very few
+people have the wit to discover what is so sedulously concealed.
+
+Deception is the necessary corollary of this, and one that very soon
+becomes changed into spite. The disappointment of being misunderstood
+must inevitably lead us to condemn those who do not comprehend us. Our
+shyness will be increased at this and we shall end by disbelieving
+ourselves in the qualities that we find other people ignoring in us.
+
+From this condition of discouragement to that of mental inertia it is
+but a step, and many worthy people who lack poise have rapidly traveled
+this road to plunge themselves into the obscurity of renunciation.
+
+They are like paralytics. Like these poor creatures they have limbs
+which are of no service to them and which from habitual lack of
+functioning end by becoming permanently useless.
+
+If their nature is a bad one they will have still more reason to
+complain of this lack of poise, with its train of inconveniences of
+which we have been treating, that will leave them weakened and a prey to
+all sorts of mental excesses which will be the more serious in their
+effects for the fact that their existence is known to no one but the
+victims.
+
+Instead of admitting that their lack of poise-due to the various faults
+of character we have been discussing--is the sole cause of the apparent
+ostracism from which they suffer, they indulge in accusations against
+fate, against the world, against circumstances, and grow to hate all
+those who have succeeded, without being willing to acknowledge that they
+have never seriously made the attempt themselves.
+
+Only those return home with the spoils who have taken part in the
+battle, have paid with their blood and risked their lives.
+
+The man who remains in hiding behind the walls of his house can hardly
+be astonished that such honors do not come his way.
+
+Life is a battle, and victory is always to the strong. The timid are
+never called upon to take their share of the booty. It becomes the
+property of those who have had the force to win it, either by sheer
+courage or by cautious strategy, for real bravery is not always that
+which calls for the easy applause of the crowd.
+
+It is found just as much among those who have the will-power to keep
+silent as to their plans and to resist the temptation to actions which,
+while satisfying their desire for energetic measures may destroy the
+edifice that they have so carefully constructed.
+
+It is for this reason that enthusiasm may be considered with justice as
+an enemy of poise.
+
+Those who act under the domination of an impulse born of a too-vivid
+impression are rarely in a state of mind that can be depended upon to
+judge sanely and impartially. They nearly always overshoot the mark at
+which they aim. They are like runners dashing forward at such a high
+speed that they can not bring themselves to a sudden stop. Habitual
+enthusiasm is also the enemy of reflection. It is an obstacle to that
+reason from which proceed strong resolves, and one is often impelled, in
+observing people who are fired with too great an ardor, to thoughts of
+the fable of the burning straw.
+
+A teacher, who inclined to the methods that consist of object lessons,
+one day asked two children to make a choice between two piles, one of
+straw, the other of wood. It is hardly necessary to add that while the
+size of the pile of straw was great that of the wood was hardly
+one-tenth of the volume.
+
+The first child, when told to make his choice, took the mass of straw,
+which he set on fire easily enough, warming himself first from a
+respectful distance and then at close range, in proportion as the heat
+of the fire grew less.
+
+In so doing he made great sport of his companion, who struggled
+meanwhile to set alight the pile of wood. But what was the outcome?
+
+The huge mass of straw was soon burned out, while the wood, once lit,
+furnished a tranquil and steady flame, which the first child watched
+with envy while seated by the mass of cinders that alone remained of the
+vanished pile that he had chosen.
+
+The man of real poise is like the child who, disclaiming the transitory
+blaze of the straw, prefers to work patiently at building a fire whose
+moderate heat will afford him a durable and useful warmth.
+
+Let us then beware of sudden unreasoning enthusiasms. After the
+ephemeral flame of their first ardor has burned itself out we shall but
+find ourselves seated by the mass of ashes formed of our mistakes and
+our dead energies.
+
+The rock on which so many abortive attempts are wrecked in the effort to
+achieve poise is a type of sentimentality peculiar to certain natures.
+
+This state of mind is characterized by a craving for expansion, which is
+all the more irritating since the timidity of the person concerned
+prevents it from being satisfied.
+
+In place of relying upon themselves, feeling their disabilities and the
+lack of poise which prevents them from proper expression, such people
+try to make themselves understood by those who do not appreciate their
+feelings, without stopping to think that they have done nothing to make
+clear what they really need.
+
+Such a chaotic state of mind, based on errors of judgment, is a very
+serious obstacle to the acquisition of poise.
+
+This anxiety to communicate their feelings, always rendered ineffective
+by the difficulty of making the effort involved, gives rise in the long
+run to a species of misanthropy.
+
+It is a matter of common knowledge that misanthropy urges those who
+suffer from it to fall back upon themselves, and from this state to that
+of active hostility toward others the road is short, and timid people
+are rarely able to pull up before they have traversed it.
+
+There comes to them from this intellectual solitude an unhappiness so
+profound that they are glad to be able to attribute to the mental
+inferiority of others the condition of moral isolation in which they
+live.
+
+To insist that they are misunderstood, and to pride themselves upon the
+fact, is the inevitable fate of those who never can summon up courage to
+undertake a battle against themselves.
+
+It seems to them a thousand times easier to say: "These minds are too
+gross to comprehend mine," than to seek for a means of establishing an
+understanding with those whom they tax with ignorance and insensibility.
+
+They might, perhaps, be convinced of the utility to them of divulging
+their feelings, could they be forced into a position where they had to
+defend their ideas or were compelled to put up a fight on behalf of
+their convictions.
+
+In the ranks of the enemies of poise sullenness most certainly finds a
+place.
+
+It is the fault of the feeble-spirited who have not the energy to affirm
+their sentiments or to make a plain statement of their convictions that
+they become incensed with those who oppose them.
+
+In their case a good deal of false pride is present. They know
+themselves to be beaten and to be incapable of fighting, yet they are
+too vain to accept defeat. They refuse the sympathy that wounds them,
+and suffer the more from their inability to yield themselves to that
+good-will which would aid and comfort them.
+
+From this mental conflict is born an irritation that manifests itself in
+the form of obstinate sullenness.
+
+In other cases the same state of mind may produce radically different
+results.
+
+Always obsessed by the fear of appearing ridiculous and by the no less
+vivid dread of seeming to be an object of sympathy, such people are
+often driven through lack of poise into extreme boastfulness.
+
+No man who has poise will ever fall a victim to this misfortune.
+
+He knows exactly what his capabilities are and he has no need to
+exaggerate his own abilities to impress his friends.
+
+Poise calls for action, when this becomes necessary; but the man of
+resolve, being always prepared to do what is needful, considers mere
+boasting and bravado as something quite unworthy of him.
+
+There are, however, certain extenuating circumstances in the cases of
+those timid people who take refuge in boasting. They are almost
+invariably the dupes of their own fancies, and for the moment really
+believe themselves to be capable of endeavors beset by difficulties, of
+the surmounting of which they understand nothing.
+
+Nothing looks easier to duplicate than certain movements which are
+performed with apparent ease by experts.
+
+Which of us has not been profoundly astonished at the enormous
+difficulty experienced in accomplishing some simple act of manual toil
+that we see performed without the least effort by a workman trained to
+this particular task?
+
+What looks easier, for instance, than to plane a piece of wood or to dig
+up the ground?
+
+Is it possible that the laborer, wheeling a barrow, really has to be
+possest of skill or strength?
+
+It hardly seems so. And yet the man who takes a plane in his hands for
+the first time will be astounded at the difficulty he experiences in
+approximating to the regularity and lightness of stroke that comes
+naturally to the carpenter.
+
+The man who essays to dig a piece of ground or to wheel a barrow, will
+find himself making irregular ditches and traveling in zigzags, and all
+this at the expense of a hundred times the energy put forth by the
+workman who is accustomed to these particular forms of labor.
+
+The person of timidity who boasts of his remarkable exploits is
+actuated, as a general rule, by sheer lack of experience.
+
+His peculiar fault keeps him always in the background and prevents him
+from accomplishing any public action, and for this reason those efforts
+appear easy to him that he has never thought of attempting.
+
+Further than this, aided by his false pride, he considers that his
+merits are easily greater than those of the people who are not able to
+understand him, and he is acting in perfect good faith when he professes
+to be able to accomplish what they can not.
+
+Is it necessary to add that the ironical reception given to such
+exhibitions of boastfulness rouse in him a feeling of irritation which
+is all the greater for the fact that he does not openly show it?
+
+The man of resolve will never experience these unpleasant emotions.
+
+He knows exactly what he wants and what he can do. So we see him
+marching ahead steadily, his eyes fixt upon the goal he has worked out
+for himself, paying no heed whatever to misleading suggestions, which
+cripple his breadth of soul and would in the end deprive him of that
+essential energy which is vital to him if he would preserve his even
+poise, the foundation of mental balance and the source of every real
+success in life.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III
+
+WAR ON TIMIDITY
+
+
+One can not be too insistent in asserting how harmful the lack of poise
+can be, and when once this weakness has reached the stage of timidity it
+may produce the most tragic consequences not only so far as the daily
+routine of our lives is concerned, but also with reference to our moral
+and physical equilibrium.
+
+So, when the nervous system is constantly set on edge by the emotions to
+which this fault gives rise, it necessarily follows that all the
+faculties suffer in their turn.
+
+This is particularly true of those who are constantly haunted by the
+fear of finding themselves in a condition of mental unpreparedness, to
+the extent that they prefer to remain in solitude and silence rather
+than to mingle in a world which really has too many other things to
+think of to concern itself with their acts or their opinions.
+
+This morbid dread of becoming the subject of ridicule ends by creating a
+peculiar condition of mind of which, as we have already pointed out,
+egoism is the pivot.
+
+In this way it is a common occurrence to see people of timidity paying
+exaggerated attention to the slightest changes in the condition of their
+health.
+
+Such people by shutting themselves out from the world have reduced it to
+the circumference of their own personalities and everything which
+touches them necessarily assumes gigantic importance in their eyes.
+
+The slightest opposition becomes for them a catastrophe. The smallest
+unpleasantness presents itself to them in the light of a tragic
+misfortune.
+
+For this reason the lives of the timid become a succession of boredoms
+and of pains.
+
+Even in those cases where no really unfortunate incident occurs, these
+people so exaggerate what actually does happen to them that the least
+little emotion causes them the most profound unhappiness.
+
+On those days when nothing in particular happens they spend their time
+anticipating all sorts of disasters, including those which are not the
+least likely to happen. To them the tiniest cloud is an omen of a
+devastating storm.
+
+When the sun is shining their timidity prevents them from exposing
+themselves to the heat of its rays.
+
+The timid man, in his moral isolation, is like the hare, who, crouched
+in its form, sleeps with one eye open in constant terror of the
+passer-by or of the hunter.
+
+It may be well to add that worry about oneself is invariably an
+accompaniment of all these troubles. People without poise are, with very
+few exceptions, egotists who exaggerate their own importance.
+
+Moreover, they suffer keenly from the obscurity into which their defects
+have forced them as well as from dread of the alternatives presented to
+them, the making of an effort to escape this fate, an idea that fills
+them with horror, or the continuing to live in the unhappy condition
+that has spoiled existence for them through their own faults.
+
+It is hardly then a matter for surprize that so many people who are thus
+mentally out of balance end by becoming neurotics or become a prey to
+those cerebral disorders that are, unfortunately, all too frequent.
+
+This condition of solitude, at once deplored and self-imposed, has the
+still more serious disadvantage of leaving the mind, for lack of proper
+control, to the domination of the most false and exaggerated ideas.
+
+It is a well-known fact that any force of exaggeration, however obvious,
+becomes less noticeable to us in proportion as it becomes more familiar.
+
+It exists, in the last analysis, only by its comparative relation to
+other things.
+
+It is certain that a child ten years old would seem very large if he
+were five feet high, whereas a man of that stature is considered a
+dwarf.
+
+Among Oriental races a woman is generally classed as a blonde whose hair
+is not absolutely black.
+
+Things only take their real appearance from a comparison with others of
+the same kind.
+
+For all his science, an ethnologist, placed in front of a man of an
+unknown tribe, would be unable to say whether this man's stature were
+normal or below the average in relation to others of his race, since no
+information would be forthcoming as to this people's height or
+characteristics. It is, therefore, no matter for surprize that the timid
+man, shut in upon himself and having no other horizon than the limited
+field of his own observations, is disposed to picture them in colors
+whose truth he can not verify, since the terms of comparison, vital to
+the accomplishment of his end, are not available to him.
+
+It is, therefore, impossible for such a man not to become accustomed to
+the idea as it presents itself to him, to such an extent that he is
+quite unconscious of its successive changes in character.
+
+Do we notice the growth of a child who is constantly with us until he
+reaches man's estate?
+
+Can we measure the development of a blossom into the perfect flower?
+
+Assuredly not, if we have lived daily in the company of the child and
+have glanced several times an hour at the blossom.
+
+Both the one and the other will reach maturity without being sensibly
+conscious of the fact that they are changing.
+
+But if we go away from the child for a few months, if, in the interval,
+we see other children, we can form an estimate of his growth and can
+compare him mentally with the other children we have met.
+
+The same is true of the flower. If other duties call us away for the
+moment from contemplating it, we will notice the progress of its
+unfolding and we will also be able to tell whether, in relation to that
+of other plants, it is quick, slow, or merely normal.
+
+The man who is timid, be he never so observant, will derive no benefit
+from these observations, for he is quite unable to generalize and refers
+them all to a point of view which cramps them hopelessly and gives them
+a color that is, entirely false.
+
+So, from the habit of thinking without any opposition, little by little
+he allows his ideas to become changed and distorted without any one's
+being able to advise him of the misconceptions which he keeps closely to
+himself.
+
+It is for this reason that all timid people have a marked tendency to
+distort facts and to acquire false ideas.
+
+It is often with perfect good faith that they affirm a thing which they
+believe sincerely, not having had the opportunity to control the
+successive changes which have transformed it absolutely from what it was
+at the outset.
+
+It is a lucky day for timid people of this class when fate prevents them
+from entering into competition with those who are possest of poise.
+
+Were these latter a hundred times weaker than they are they would still
+end by triumphing over their feeble antagonists.
+
+It is above all in the affairs of ordinary every-day life that poise
+renders the most valuable service.
+
+If it becomes a question of presenting or discussing a matter of
+business, the timid man, embarrassed by his own personality, begins to
+stammer, becomes confused, and can not recall a single argument. He
+finally abandons all the gain that he dreamed of making in order to put
+an end to the torments from which he suffers.
+
+He is to be considered lucky if under the domination of the troubles in
+which he finds himself, he does not lose all faculty of speech.
+
+This failing, so common among the timid, is a further cause of confusion
+to the victim.
+
+At the bare idea that he may become the prey of such a calamity he
+unconsciously closes his lips and lowers the tones of his voice.
+
+The man of poise, on the other hand, feels himself the more impelled to
+redouble his efforts in proportion to the need his cause has for being
+well defended.
+
+He knows how to arrange his arguments, and to foresee those of his
+adversary, and, if he finds himself face to face with a statement which
+he can not refute, he will seek some means of softening the defeat or of
+changing the ground of the debate in such a way as to avoid confusion to
+himself.
+
+In any event, such an occurrence will have no profound effect upon him.
+Vanquished on one point, he will find the presence of mind to at once
+change the character of the discussion to questions which are at once
+familiar and favorable to him.
+
+He who goes forth into life armed with poise has also the marked
+advantage over the timid that comes from superior health.
+
+This phrase should not be the occasion for a smile. Timidity is a
+chronic cause of poor health in those who suffer from it.
+
+Pushed to extremes, it is the source of a thousand nervous defects.
+
+We have already touched upon stammering.
+
+Unreasonable blushing is another misfortune of the timid. In drawing the
+attention of one's opponents it betrays at once one's ideas and one's
+fears.
+
+Fear of this uncomfortable blushing inhibits many people from making the
+most of themselves or from properly protecting their own interests.
+
+The shame they feel on account of this inferiority leads them, as we
+have seen, to seek isolation in which hypochondria slowly grows upon
+them, sure forerunner of that terrible neurasthenia of which the effects
+are so diverse and so disconcerting.
+
+The man who was at the outset no more than timid, easily becomes
+transformed first into a misanthrope, then into a monomaniac tortured by
+a thousand physical inhibitions, such as the inability to hold a pen, to
+walk unaccompanied across an open space, to ride in a public conveyance,
+etc., etc.
+
+It must not be forgotten that these crises of embarrassments always
+produce extreme emotion accompanied by palpitations whose frequent
+recurrence may lead to actual heart trouble.
+
+All these disadvantages increase the sullenness of the timid, who are
+overcome by the sense of their own physical weakness, which they know
+has its origin in a condition of mind that they lack the power either to
+change or to abolish.
+
+All these causes of physical inferiority are unknown to the man who
+appreciates the value of poise and puts it into practise.
+
+Such a man has no fear of embarrassment in speaking. He is a stranger to
+the misery of aimless blushing. If he does not always emerge victorious
+from the oratorical combats in which he engages he at least has the
+satisfaction of acknowledging to himself that he has not been beaten
+easily or without a struggle. In short, misanthropy, neurasthenia, and
+all their attendant ills, are for him unknown ailments.
+
+One can not be too watchful against the attacks of timidity, which, like
+a contaminated spring, poisons the entire existence of those who are
+unable to dam up its flow.
+
+Among the martyrdoms which are caused by it must be counted indecision,
+which is one of its most frequent and most unhappy results.
+
+The timid man can not stop at any point.
+
+He vacillates unceasingly and takes turn by turn the most opposing
+viewpoints.
+
+It is only fair to add that he rejects them all almost as soon as he has
+formed them.
+
+His state of mind being always one of distrust of his own powers, it is
+impossible for him not to be afraid that he has made a mistake, if he is
+left to do his own thinking.
+
+We have seen how his craving for sympathy, never satisfied, since he
+does not make it known, drives him ever into impotent rage, which throws
+him back upon himself in scarcely concealed irritation, that alienates
+him from all sympathy and precludes all confidences.
+
+It is rarely, therefore, that the timid person does not find himself
+isolated when facing the decisions of greater or less gravity that daily
+life makes necessary.
+
+In terror of making a mistake that may lead to some change of course or
+give rise to the necessity of taking some definite action, he hesitates
+everlastingly.
+
+If, driven into a corner by circumstances, he ends by making some
+decision, we may be sure that he will at once regret it and that, if the
+time still remains to him, he will modify it in some way, only to revert
+to it again a moment later.
+
+His will is like a ball continually thrown to and fro by children. No
+sooner is it tossed in one direction than it is suddenly sent flying in
+another, to return finally to its starting-place at the moment when the
+players' weariness causes it to fall to the ground.
+
+This particular state of mind is primarily due to two causes:
+
+The desire for perfection that haunts all timid people.
+
+The fear of making a mistake that arises from the habit of continually
+mistrusting one's own judgment.
+
+There are many other causes, the analysis of which is far beyond the
+scope of this work, but every one of these can be referred to the two
+main issues we have defined. The desire for perfection is at once the
+result and the cause of most timidity.
+
+While the man of resolve, relying upon his experience, is able to
+perform his part in those normal exigencies that he is able to conceive
+of, the timid man, shut off by his defects from all practical knowledge
+of life, comes to grief by discovering something amiss with every course
+that he considers.
+
+A familiar proverb tells us that everything has its good and its bad
+side.
+
+The timid see only the latter when making the decisions that fate
+imposes upon them.
+
+They fall into despair at their inability to see the other side of
+things and their feeble will drives against solid obstacles like a car
+colliding with a block of granite.
+
+The man of resolution, instead of yielding to despair, seeks to surmount
+such a difficulty by turning his car in another direction; but, if the
+new road shows him nothing but dangerous pitfalls, he will choose to go
+around the block and continue his journey, remembering it as a landmark
+for his return.
+
+For this reason we shall find him well on his way toward his journey's
+end while the victim of timidity continues to exhaust himself by vain
+efforts, thankful enough if he is not permanently mired in some of the
+bogs into which he has imprudently ventured. This is a state of affairs
+of much more frequent occurrence than one might suppose. Timidity, as we
+have seen, often unites the boldest conceptions with complete
+inexperience, which does not permit of accurate judgment as to
+impossibilities.
+
+This lack of knowledge of life is also the cause of a continual fear of
+making mistakes.
+
+The man of resolution never suffers from this complaint.
+
+Having taught himself the value of a ripened judgment, he is quick to
+recognize the advantage to be derived from any project. He weighs
+alternatives carefully and only makes his decisions on well-thought-out
+grounds, after sufficient reasoned reflection to make sure that he will
+have no cause for future regret.
+
+We have already remarked that such forms of irresolution constituted a
+martyrdom. The word is by no means too strong. They are never-ending
+occasions for physical and moral torture.
+
+They are to be met with in the most trivial details of every-day life.
+
+The mere crossing of a street becomes, for the nervous man, an
+ever-recurring source of torment.
+
+He is afraid to go forward at the proper moment, takes one step ahead
+and another back, looks despairingly at the line of vehicles that bars
+his way, and, when a momentary opening in this confronts him, takes so
+long to make up his mind that the opportunity of crossing is past before
+he has seized it.
+
+Or again he may suddenly rush forward, without any regard for the danger
+to which he is exposed, hesitating suddenly when in the way of the
+vehicles that threaten him, and quite incapable of slipping past them,
+or of any quick or dexterous movement by which he may avoid them.
+
+This little picture, despite its commonplace nature, is nevertheless a
+symbol.
+
+In the crossings of life, as well as those of the streets, the man who
+is timid is at an immense disadvantage when compared with the man of
+poise.
+
+The latter does not worry his head about the traffic that blocks his
+progress.
+
+Aided by his will-power and by confidence in his judgment, he stands
+firmly awaiting the moment that affords him an opening. Then, with
+muscles tense and wits collected, he starts, and whether he darts ahead
+here, or glides adroitly there, he threads his way through the traffic
+and reaches his goal without having suffered from accident.
+
+The troubles upon which we have been dwelling are never his. His soul,
+dominated by a well-ordered will, by reason, and all the other good
+qualities we enumerated in the first chapter, is proof against all
+attacks of weakness.
+
+In the event of his not possessing all these virtues, he has the wit to
+keep the thought of them always before him and to work hard to acquire
+them, so that he may become what, in modern parlance, we call "a force,"
+that is to say one whose soul is virile enough to influence not only his
+mind, but even to liberate his body from the defects created in it by
+distrust of self.
+
+But, it will be claimed, there are people who are born timid and who are
+quite unable to achieve the mastery of themselves.
+
+Every human being can win the victory over himself. This we will prove
+conclusively in the pages that are to follow, dedicated to those who are
+desirous of arming themselves, in the great game of life, with that
+master card which is named POISE.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+PART II
+
+HOW TO ACQUIRE POISE
+
+
+CHAPTER I
+
+MODESTY AND EFFRONTERY CONTRASTED
+
+
+"Never force your talents" a well-known writer has said. One always
+feels like crying this to those who, thinking to reach the goal of
+poise, fall into excess and develop effrontery and exaggeratedness.
+
+Poise can not exist without coolness. We have seen that this quality is
+rarely met with in enthusiasts.
+
+It is never found in those who have effrontery.
+
+Poise does not consist in the species of ostentatious carelessness which
+essays to travel through life as a child might wander among hives of
+bees without taking any precautions against being stung.
+
+Neither is it that false courage that drives one headlong into a
+conflict without any thought as to the blows likely to fall upon the
+foolhardy person who has ventured into it.
+
+The principle upon which we must start is this: life is a battle in
+which strategy always has the advantage over blind courage.
+
+Unfortunate is he who, by his boasting or his lack of generalship,
+decides upon an attack for which he is not really prepared. However
+brave he may be he will infallibly find himself vanquished in a struggle
+in which everything has combined in advance to defeat him.
+
+Boasting is not courage. Still less is it poise.
+
+Poise is a power derived from the mastery of self. It inhibits all
+outward manifestations that are likely to result in giving information
+to strangers with regard to our real feelings.
+
+Braggarts can not avoid this stumbling-block. They know nothing of the
+delights of contemplation, from which arise ripe resolutions that will
+be steadfastly followed.
+
+With the noise of their boastings, with the shouting of their own
+braggart ineptitudes, they hypnotize themselves so thoroughly that they
+are quite unable to hear the counsel that sane wisdom whispers in their
+ears.
+
+They are like the man in the eastern fable who was quite unable to
+follow a beaten path and was constantly wandering across the fields of
+his neighbors.
+
+These detours were in general much longer than the direct road would
+have been, and he received a constant stream of abuse, to say nothing of
+blows, from the people whose crops he was ruining.
+
+But he seemed quite insensible to assaults and insisted upon following,
+across lots, a road which led nowhere.
+
+It would be difficult to paint a more faithful portrait. Like the
+peasant in the story, the man of effrontery is always wandering far from
+the common road, the tranquil peace of which he despises.
+
+He delights in crossing land that he knows to be forbidden to him, seeks
+to force open gates that are closed at his approach, and, if he can not
+overcome the opposition of the porter, watches for the moment when an
+open window will permit him entrance into a house where he will be
+coldly, if not angrily, received.
+
+What is the result of this?
+
+Nothing favorable to his plans, one may be sure. People point him out.
+They fly from him, and were he the bearer of the most advantageous
+proposition, refuse to put any faith in his assertions as soon as they
+get to know him in the least.
+
+Effrontery may sometimes impose upon the innocent. But it is only a
+momentary deception, quickly dissipated the moment that time is given to
+estimate the emptiness of its claims.
+
+There is another variety of effrontery that is comparable to the form of
+courage exhibited by the timorous who sing in a loud voice in order to
+lessen their terror and imagine that by so doing they give the illusion
+of bravery.
+
+People of this sort talk very loudly, often contradicting themselves,
+and pass judgment upon everything, dismissing the most difficult
+questions with only a passing thought, but remain silent and are put
+completely out of countenance as soon as one insists upon their
+listening to reason, or when--in familiar language--they "meet their
+match."
+
+The man of effrontery is a passionate devotee of bluff, and not only of
+that variety of which Jonathan Dick has said:
+
+"It is a security discounted in advance."
+
+A little further on he adds:
+
+"Bluffers of the right sort are only so when the occasion demands it, in
+order to give the impression that the wished-for result has already been
+achieved.
+
+"As soon as their credit is assured and appearances have become
+realities that allow them to establish themselves in positions of
+security they at once cease the effort to deceive."
+
+Our author concludes:
+
+"Bluff, to be successful, must never be founded upon puerility or brag."
+
+Now these two qualities are always to be met with in the doings of the
+man of effrontery, who only achieves by accident the goal he aims at,
+and then only in the most insecure way.
+
+Drawbacks differing as to their causes, but equally unlucky as to their
+results, are born of the opposite fault--modesty.
+
+It is high time to destroy the leniency shown toward this defect that
+old-fashioned educators once decorated with the title of virtue.
+
+Time has forged ahead, taking with it in its rapid course all forms of
+progress, which, in its turn, has made giant strides.
+
+Ideas have changed materially. Modern life has to face emergencies
+formerly undreamed of, and those who still believe in the virtue of
+modesty are their own enemies, as well as those of the people whom they
+advise to cultivate it.
+
+The case of this man is similar to that of many others, whose meaning
+has been undergoing a gradual change due to the erroneous interpretation
+that has deliberately been placed upon it.
+
+Modesty is very frequently nothing more than an evidence of
+incompetence.
+
+It has rise in sentiments that the man who would be up to date must
+avoid at all hazards--distrust of self and hatred of exertion.
+
+One rarely finds it in the man who is active and who knows his own
+worth. To revenge itself, it flourishes among the lazy, who try to save
+their pride and to conceal their secret irritation at the successes of
+others by assuming an humble attitude and exclaiming:
+
+"Oh! I didn't care to do it!"
+
+Or still more frequently:
+
+"No, I haven't entered the lists. I am absolutely without ambition!"
+
+Under similar circumstances people who are unknown cry out, and with
+reason:
+
+"Oh! I have a horror of publicity!"
+
+This is simply a roundabout way of informing us that were it not for
+their retiring modesty, the hundred mouths of rumor would be shouting
+their praise.
+
+Modesty is very rarely what it appears to be. As soon as it exhibits the
+form of a wise reserve it must be called by another name: prudence and
+self-justification.
+
+The attitude of trying to keep one's actions from becoming known is not
+a laudable one, and can only be adopted as the result of a philosophy of
+inaction.
+
+What treasures of knowledge would have remained unknown to us if all the
+scientists and all the men of genius had made a practise of modesty!
+
+If our forefathers had been modest, when it was the fashion to be proud
+of this quality, our museums would be empty and only a few of the
+initiated would know that men of exceptional merit, which they had
+sedulously concealed, had written manuscripts which had never been
+published. The humility of the writers in such cases could be made to
+pay too severe a penalty.
+
+No! Men who have merits are not modest! This false virtue is the
+appanage of none but weak and irresolute hearts.
+
+We should congratulate ourselves, while admitting these facts, that our
+forefathers were not so constituted, and that their faith in themselves,
+by giving them confidence in their own work, made it possible for them
+to hand these on to their descendants.
+
+Of what use to us would it be to know that a poem of finer quality and
+more splendid fire than any we have ever read had once been written, if
+the modesty of its author had led him to keep it always in his pocket
+and it had finally vanished into the limbo of ignored and forgotten
+things?
+
+It is then actually wrong to sing the praises of modesty, which is no
+more than distrust of oneself, egoism, and laziness.
+
+The man who boasts of his modesty will feel no shame at producing
+nothing. He hides his ineptitude behind this convenient veil whose
+thickness allows him to hint of the existence of things which are
+nothing but figments of his imagination.
+
+We might add that the man who proclaims his modesty enters the struggle
+with a decided handicap against him. The moment he begins to have doubts
+about his own powers he will be sure to find himself the prey of an
+unfortunate indecision, and that at the very moment when he is called
+upon to perform some decisive action.
+
+"One day," says an old writer, "three men, in the course of a climb up a
+mountain, found themselves confronted by a crevasse that they must
+cross.
+
+"One of these was a timid man, another a boaster, and the third was
+possest of a reasoned poise.
+
+"The boaster made a jump without stopping to think and without taking
+the trouble to measure the gap. He plunged into it.
+
+"The modest man then advanced, looked down into the gulf, then decided
+to make use of the irregularities in the surface of the chasm to reduce
+the width of the jump.
+
+"He made several attempts to carry this out, but could hardly touch the
+edge before an instinctive movement of fear forced him back.
+
+"He worked so hard and so long at this that he was quite tired out when
+he at last chose the moment for the decisive attempt. He jumped, indeed,
+but in such a half-hearted way that he merely touched the opposite face
+of the crevasse and fell to the bottom of the precipice alongside of the
+boaster.
+
+"The third climber, who possest the advantage of poise, had meanwhile
+been losing no time. He had mentally gaged the width of the crevasse,
+had made a number of trial jumps to test his ability to clear it, and
+when, with a firm resolution to succeed, he reached the edge from which
+he must leap, his soul, fortified by the knowledge of his powers was
+fired with a single idea, the consciousness of his own agility and
+strength.
+
+"By this means he, alone of the three, was able to cross the gulf in
+which his two companions had perished."
+
+Effrontery and boastfulness have often another source. The shyness of
+those who suffer from timidity, by isolating them and denying them the
+means of expansion, prevents them from obtaining a real control over
+their feelings, which undergo a process of deterioration so slow that
+they do not notice it.
+
+There are very few things to which we can not easily become accustomed,
+to the extent of a complete failure to notice their peculiarities, if
+their strangeness is only unfolded to us gradually.
+
+A thousand things which shock us at the first blush take on the guise of
+every-day matters when once we have acquired the habit of familiarity
+with them.
+
+The timid man, who will not openly acknowledge his feelings, is
+practically unable to take cognizance of their gradual transformation.
+
+We may add that he is always prone to dream, and peoples his world
+involuntarily with imaginary utopias, which he begins by considering as
+desirable, then as possible, and finally as actually existing.
+
+This is the starting-point of boastfulness. It partakes at once of
+falsity and of sincerity. The timid man loves to feel himself important,
+and he merely pities the people whom he considers incapable of
+understanding him. He is, nevertheless, sincere in his bravado, as his
+dreams entirely deceive him as to his real self.
+
+In his solitary meditations he deliberately shakes off his own
+personality, as a butterfly abandons the shelter of its chrysalis, and,
+following the example of that gorgeous insect, he flies away on the
+wings of his dreams in the guise of the being that he imagines himself
+to have become.
+
+This creature resembles him not at all. It is brave, courageous,
+eloquent. It accomplishes the most brilliant feats of daring.
+
+In this way, just so soon as the timid man becomes intermittently a
+braggart, he commences to boast of exploits quite impossible of
+performance. We must remember, however, that it is not he who speaks,
+but merely the idealized ego which he invents because he is chagrined at
+being misunderstood.
+
+Moral isolation is the parent of other curious phenomena. It imparts the
+gift of seeing things exactly as we would wish them to be, by clothing
+them little by little with a character entirely foreign to that which
+they really possess.
+
+In "Timidity: How to Overcome It," we are told the following little
+personal anecdote of the Japanese philosopher Yoritomo:
+
+"It was my misfortune as a child," says this ancient sage, "to be the
+victim of a serious illness which kept me confined to a bed and unable
+to move.
+
+"I was not allowed to read and my only distraction was the study of the
+objects in my immediate neighborhood.
+
+"The pattern of a screen made a particular impression upon me with its
+clusters of flowers and its bouquets of roses.
+
+"I passed hours in the contemplation of it.
+
+"At first I merely followed the outlines with my eye, finding in them no
+more than an artistic reproduction of nature. But, little by little, the
+clusters of flowers were transformed into gardens, the rose-trees took
+on the imposing aspect of forests. In these gardens my dreams created a
+princess, and in the forest a company of warriors.
+
+"Then the romance began.
+
+"Every new line I observed became the pretext for creating a new
+character. The princess was very soon taken captive by a giant--whom I
+saw perfectly--and the warriors undertook the task of rescue.
+
+"Every day a panorama moved before me of changing personalities, who
+reenacted the events of the story. Finally the obsession took such a
+strong hold of me that I began to talk about it in a manner that aroused
+the fears of my parents.
+
+"The screen was banished from my room and when, a few days later, it was
+brought back for me to see, I was able to discover nothing more in it
+than the designs with which it was adorned."
+
+This example, taken directly from life, shows us better than the most
+extended arguments the dangers of moral isolation.
+
+By this we do not mean the isolation that is essential to concentration,
+the practise of which always leads to the most fruitful results.
+
+We are speaking solely of the aloofness born of timidity or of
+exaggerated pride, which, in depriving us of contrary views, develops in
+us the propensity to see things from only one angle, which is always
+that which happens to flatter our vanity or please our tastes.
+
+All those persons who suffer from this disease of the will, which
+deprives them of the ability of discussing things, may be compared to
+runners who have neglected to ascertain the limits of their race.
+
+Like the latter, they keep running round the same track without any
+means of discovering when they are nearing the goal.
+
+Instead of stopping, when they have reached it, they keep running
+forward and the monotony of their efforts, coupled with the fever-heat
+engendered by their exertions, very soon causes them to view the objects
+that they keep passing and passing under a deformed and distorted
+aspect.
+
+The man of reason, on the other hand, runs with the single purpose in
+his mind of reaching the winning-post. He studiously avoids taking his
+eyes off the goal, which he has carefully located in advance, and takes
+pains to note the moment when he is nearing it, so as to run no risks of
+making his spurt too soon.
+
+It is a matter of frequent observation that timidity often voluntarily
+assumes the role of effrontery, from very despair of successfully
+accomplishing the task it is ambitious to perform.
+
+Illustrious examples of this contention are not lacking. Rousseau, who
+was a coward of the greatest hardihood, says in his _Confessions_:
+
+"My foolish and unreasoning fear, that I was quite unable to overcome,
+of perpetrating some breach of good manners led me to assume the
+attitude of caring nothing for the niceties of life."
+
+A little further on, he adds:
+
+"I was made a cynic by shyness. I posed as a despiser of the politeness
+I did not know how to practise."
+
+This is a much more frequent cause than one might think of the
+exhibition of an effrontery which is apparently deliberate and
+intentional.
+
+The timid man, feeling himself awkward and clownish when performing the
+usual acts of courtesy, assumes the attitude of caring nothing for them
+and of avoiding them deliberately, while all the while he is tortured by
+the inability to perform them without seeming ridiculous.
+
+But the onlooker is not deceived. The outward appearance of cynicism
+often conceals an inward sensitiveness of soul that is quite obvious,
+and the actor makes so poor a hand at identifying himself with the
+character he would assume that it is clearly evident he is only playing
+a part.
+
+The conflict of diametrically opposing forces shows itself plainly in
+his attitude which vacillates between the stiffest formality and the
+easiest assurance.
+
+The awkwardness that is the bugbear of the timid shows itself even
+beneath their work of cynicism, and the very effort accuses them, no
+less than their flighty and unreasoning conversation and their gestures,
+now exaggerated and now represt, all of which make up a whole that
+entirely fails to give an impression of harmony.
+
+And what possible harmony can there be between a soul and a body that
+are completely out of accord with each other?
+
+Should it be asked what the difference is between presumption or
+effrontery and the poise that we have in mind, this simple illustration
+should be illuminating.
+
+Effrontery, bravado, and exaggeration are qualities that are shown by
+those who exceed their own capacity without giving the question a
+thought.
+
+Poise is the virtue which gives us the strength of mind to analyze the
+possibilities that are dominant within us, to cultivate them, and to
+strengthen them in every possible way before undertaking an enterprise
+which is likely to call them into play.
+
+Real poise has no bluster about it. It has a good deal in it of
+self-possession, the discretion belonging to which is one of its marked
+characteristics.
+
+Repression of our outward movements enables us to achieve that control
+over our emotions which makes a perfect cloak for our intentions, and
+leaves our opponents in perplexity as to how to attack the fortress that
+they wish to conquer.
+
+It is, therefore, between modesty and effrontery, both equally
+prejudicial to success, that poise must naturally be placed.
+
+But, it will be objected, all the world does not possess this gift of
+poise. Are those who do not share it to be forever denied all chance of
+success?
+
+Not so! It is open to all the world to acquire this gift, and if the
+chapters following this are read with care it will be seen that it is
+something that can be cultivated, so that it can be gradually perfected
+and carried about with one as the germ of every sort of success, the
+happy issue of which depends upon a thorough realization of one's own
+merits and the honorable ambition to accomplish a task that has been
+prudently planned and bravely carried to an end.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II
+
+PHYSICAL EXERCISES TO ACQUIRE POISE
+
+
+Before preparing oneself by the exercise of reasoning and will-power for
+the acquisition of poise, it is vitally necessary to make oneself
+physically fit for the effort to be undertaken.
+
+One should begin with this fundamental principle:
+
+Timidity being a disease one must treat it just as one would any other
+illness.
+
+Like all other physical maladies it is sure to be the cause of loss of
+social prestige to those who suffer from it.
+
+It must then be combated in the same way as any other infirmity of long
+standing that threatens to ruin the life of the sufferer.
+
+It is a grave mistake to consider it merely a mental ailment that can be
+alleviated by nothing but psychological treatment.
+
+One's nervous condition plays a very large part in the conquest of
+poise.
+
+We must, therefore, watch most carefully over the good health of the
+body before taking any measures whatever to abolish a condition of
+affairs that has been engendered by physical weakness and that will be
+fostered by it unless such weakness can be eradicated or more or less
+dissipated and ameliorated by a thousand little daily acts of care.
+
+It must be understood that we are not now speaking of medical treatment.
+We have reference merely to that common-sense hygiene which has become
+more or less a part of modern existence, and the daily practise of
+which, while firmly establishing the health, has at the same time an
+undoubted reflex action upon the mind. It is a well-known fact that
+energy is never found in a weakened body, and that people who are
+suffering are clearly marked down to become the prey of those wasting
+diseases, whose names, all more or less fantastic, may be classed as a
+whole under the general heading of "nervous maladies."
+
+To enumerate them is superfluous and unnecessary. Lack of poise gives
+rise to all sorts of weaknesses, which are given the names of nervous
+diseases and finally become classed in the category of phobias, of which
+the starting-point is always a habit of fear due to excess of timidity.
+This morbid disposition is the parent of a continual apprehensiveness
+which is shown upon all sorts of occasions.
+
+The man who has the space phobia is quite unable to cross an open space
+unless he is supported or, at the very least, accompanied.
+
+Claustrophobia is the malady of those who have a horror of close
+quarters from which they can not easily make their escape.
+
+Writers' cramp is nothing in the world but one of these exaggerated
+nervous terrors.
+
+Erythrophobia, that is to say the habit of inopportune and constant
+blushing, is another of the commonest forms of excessive timidity.
+
+Stammering is another of the tortures that people of poise do not
+experience, except in those cases where it is caused by a physical
+malformation.
+
+All these maladies attack only the timid.
+
+There are many others, less serious in their nature, such as indecision,
+exaggerated scrupulousness, extreme pliability, hypochondria. All of
+these should be ruthlessly supprest the moment we become aware of them,
+for they are one and all the forerunners of that mentally diseased
+condition which gives rise to the phobias of which we have just been
+speaking.
+
+To those who would seriously devote themselves to the cultivation of
+poise it is, therefore, a vital necessity to be in a condition of
+perfect health. It would be a misfortune, indeed, for them to find
+themselves balked in their progress toward acquiring this quality by
+anxieties regarding the condition of their bodies.
+
+Any indisposition, not to mention actual diseases, has a tendency to
+inhibit all initiative.
+
+There is no room for doubt that a physical ailment by attracting to
+itself the attention of the person who is attacked by it, prevents him
+from giving the proper amount of energy to whatever he may be engaged
+upon.
+
+He thinks about nothing but his malady and quite forgets to take the
+exercises that would enable him to alter his condition, to change his
+actions, and even to make over his thoughts.
+
+His thoughts above all. Physical well-being has an undeniable influence
+upon one's mental health.
+
+One very rarely sees a sick person who is happy. Even those who are
+endowed with great force of character lose, under the burden of their
+sufferings, part of their firmness of soul and of their legitimate
+ambition.
+
+A very scientific force of hygiene is particularly recommended.
+Excessive measures of any sort must be avoided for various reasons:
+
+(1) They are antagonistic to the maintenance of a perfect physical
+equilibrium.
+
+(2) They will inevitably grow to dominate the mind unduly.
+
+When we speak of excesses, we intend to include those undertaken in the
+way of work no less than those which are the outcome of the search for
+pleasure.
+
+Nevertheless we will hasten to add that these last are much the more to
+be feared.
+
+What can be expected, for instance, from a man who has passed a night in
+debauchery?
+
+Morning finds him a weakling, good for nothing, and incapable of making
+the slightest effort that calls for energy.
+
+He is lucky, indeed, if his excesses have no disastrous results that
+will destroy his happiness or his good name.
+
+The fear of complications that may be the outcome of his gross pleasures
+soon begins to haunt him and to usurp in his mind the place of nobler
+and more useful impulses.
+
+As to his health, it is hardly necessary for us to insist upon the
+disorder that such habits must necessarily produce.
+
+The least misfortune that he can look for is a profound lassitude and a
+desire for rest which is the enemy of all virile effort.
+
+The same thing is true of the man who indulges too freely in the
+pleasures of the table. The work of digestion leaves him in an exhausted
+condition and with a craving for repose that very soon results in a
+complete lack of moral tone.
+
+Even supposing that his daily routine consists of two principal meals,
+and of two others of less importance, it will be easily understood that
+the man who loads down his stomach with such a large amount of
+continuous work will not be very apt to adapt himself readily to matters
+of a wholly different kind.
+
+To avoid pain, to sit inert, like a gorged animal, without attempting to
+think, is the sole desire of the gluttons who are wearied by every
+repeated excess.
+
+The same reasoning could be applied to the lazy, who suffer in health
+from indulgence in their favorite vice.
+
+It can not be disputed that lack of exercise is the cause of ailments
+that have a marked effect upon the moral character.
+
+Since physical laziness always goes hand in hand with mental apathy, it
+follows that a dread of exerting oneself is always to be found coupled
+with a hatred of being forced to think.
+
+It is, therefore, essential for the man who would acquire poise to
+fortify himself in advance against physical weaknesses which, by
+undermining his will-power, will soon furnish him with the most
+plausible reasons for losing interest in the steady application that is
+needed for accomplishing his purpose.
+
+In achieving the conquest of poise certain physical exercises, practised
+every day, and vigorously followed out, will be found of considerable
+help.
+
+Before discussing the practical methods which are at once their
+starting-point and their result, we will consider in turn the series of
+exercises that must be performed each day in order to keep oneself in
+the condition of physical well-being which allows of the accomplishment
+of moral reform.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III
+
+FOUR SERIES OF PHYSICAL EXERCISES
+
+
+FIRST SERIES--BREATHING
+
+The point of departure for the cultivation of poise, like that of
+everything else in fact, must be a well-ordered system of hygiene, far
+removed from excess, and insisting only upon the points we have already
+indicated.
+
+Without wishing to fall into the well-known error of so many modern
+teachers, who assign an exaggerated importance to breathing exercises,
+we must, nevertheless, admit the great role that respiration plays in
+physical balance.
+
+We are now speaking, understand, of methodical breathing, we might
+almost term it "reasoned" breathing.
+
+Every one, of course, breathes without being aware of it from the moment
+of his birth to the hour of his death, but very few people are aware how
+to increase the power and to enlarge the capacity of their lungs.
+
+Nevertheless, upon these conditions it is that activity depends, as well
+as the health and the energy that enables us to consecrate ourselves to
+the pursuit of a definite aim.
+
+Without having to lay claim to a vast knowledge of medicine one can
+discover that all repeated exercise tends to strengthen the organ that
+is employed.
+
+Thus, well-directed and carefully practised breathing gives the heart a
+stronger beat and facilitates the action of the lungs.
+
+From these arises a general feeling of physical well-being, which tends
+to the preservation of good health and stores up the energy we need to
+carry out our resolves.
+
+It is, then, advisable to devote several minutes every day to breathing
+exercises, not merely automatic, but purposeful and under thorough
+control.
+
+To accomplish this there are two methods.
+
+The first, very easy of comprehension, is to lie down on one's back and
+to breathe deeply with the mouth closed and the nostrils dilated.
+
+As much air as can be held must be taken into the lungs, then the mouth
+must be opened and the air must be allowed to escape gradually.
+
+During this operation one should pay particular attention to expanding
+the walls of the chest, while flattening the stomach.
+
+About twenty deep respirations are required to accomplish the desired
+effect.
+
+Little by little the lungs will dilate and one will unconsciously
+increase the length of the inspiration and the slowness with which the
+air is expelled.
+
+The second method consists in standing erect, with the head thrown
+slightly back. The lungs should then be filled with air and one should
+count mentally up to five or even ten before exhaling the air that has
+been breathed in.
+
+It is advisable that when exhaling one should utter a continuous hum,
+which must be absolutely free from trembling when one has practised it
+properly.
+
+People who have practised this exercise have often stated that this
+method of breathing has been of great help to them when much fatigued as
+well as a first-class stimulus in moments when all their physical powers
+were to be called into play.
+
+A well-known college professor has assured us that every day, before
+giving his lectures, he makes use of this exercise. He claims that he
+has thus gained a freedom of breathing the good effects of which are
+manifest in the facility with which he is able to give his lecture and
+in his general feeling of ease. Rendered quite free from any suspicion
+of nervousness, he feels that he is completely master of himself and in
+a fit state of moral and physical health to employ the poise that is
+essential to the man who has to instruct and to convince others.
+
+Deep breathing has the further advantage of developing the lungs, of
+strengthening them, and at the same time of making their ordinary
+functioning more regular.
+
+The man who practises this exercise will have much less propensity to
+get out of breath. This will be a great assistance to those timid people
+who are disconcerted by trifles and who, at the least little occurrence,
+become so much affected by emotion that they experience a sensible
+acceleration of the action of the heart.
+
+Palpitation can not take place without causing us physical discomfort,
+and this condition is a serious stumbling-block in the way of the
+acquisition of poise, for, in view of the great stress the man of
+timidity lays upon the opinion of others, he will be apprehensive of
+giving them any inkling of his distress, and yet his difficulty in
+breathing will be bound to reveal it.
+
+The exercise of which we have been speaking should be performed with
+care twice a day.
+
+For those whose leisure hours are few it can be accomplished without
+losing any of the time which is already preempted by other things.
+
+It is merely a question of remembering it as soon as one wakes in the
+morning and of never forgetting it before one falls asleep at night.
+
+The few minutes between the moment that one wakes and the time one gets
+out of bed can be most profitably employed in this way.
+
+The same thing is true at night.
+
+If the occupations of the day and of the evening leave us no time to
+devote to this exercise, we can always go through it in the moments
+between retiring to bed and falling asleep.
+
+It will thus be seen that there is really no valid excuse for not
+undertaking this practise, whose effects will certainly be most
+beneficial.
+
+
+SECOND SERIES--TRAINING OF THE EYE
+
+But our physical efforts must not stop here.
+
+It is more than necessary that we should make others feel the effects of
+the mastery that we are slowly acquiring over ourselves.
+
+The eye is an invaluable assistant to the man who is studying to acquire
+poise.
+
+It is not necessary here, in connection with the magnetic properties of
+the eye, to enter into a digression too extensive for the scope of this
+book, but we can not neglect this one more-than-important factor
+altogether.
+
+We are speaking now not only of the power in the gaze of others but of
+that of our own eyes in relation to our associates.
+
+We must do our best, in fine, to develop the power of our gaze, while
+studying to fortify ourselves against the influence brought to bear upon
+us in this direction by others.
+
+One frequently notices, especially in the case of people who are timid,
+a propensity to lose their powers of resistance with those who are able
+to fix them with a steady stare.
+
+One has often seen people who lack will-power emerging completely upset
+from the grueling of an interview in which they have admitted everything
+that they had most fervently resolved never to disclose.
+
+A superior force has dominated them to such an extent that they have
+found it impossible to conduct the discussion in the way they had
+planned to do it.
+
+The man who is in earnest about acquiring poise must, then, be on his
+guard against betraying himself under the magnetism of some one else's
+gaze.
+
+At the same time he must cultivate his own powers of the eye, so that
+he, too, can possess that ability against which, in others, he must be
+careful to protect himself, and can utilize it for his own ends.
+
+The first principle is to avoid looking directly into the pupils of
+one's interlocutor.
+
+This is the only way in which a beginner can avoid being affected by the
+magnetism of the gaze.
+
+By this word magnetism we have in mind nothing verging in the least upon
+the supernatural.
+
+We have reference only to the well-known physical discomfort experienced
+by those who have not yet become masters of poise when meeting a steady
+stare.
+
+Its effect is so strong that, in the majority of cases, the timid are
+quite unable to endure it. They stammer, lose their presence of mind,
+and finally reveal everything they are asked to tell, if only to escape
+from the tyranny of the gaze which seems to go right through them and to
+dictate the words that they must utter.
+
+One must be careful, then, not to allow oneself to become swayed by the
+gaze of another. But since it would seem ridiculous to keep one's eyes
+constantly lowered, and is impolite to allow them to wander from the
+face of the person with whom one is speaking, one can escape the
+magnetic effect of his pupils by looking steadily at the bridge of his
+nose directly between his eyes.
+
+When first practising this one must be careful not to look too fixedly,
+for the eye has not yet acquired the necessary muscular power, and one
+will quickly find oneself fascinated instead of dominating.
+
+But this method is an absolute safeguard, if one does not stare too
+fixedly.
+
+It must not be forgotten that this spot is known as the "magnetic
+point."
+
+In the case of those who have made no study of the power of the eye, and
+particularly of those who are lacking in poise, this method of looking
+steadily at the bridge of the other's nose, while not having any marked
+effect upon him, will save them from becoming the tools of his will.
+
+Certain easy exercises will be found most useful in arriving at the
+possession of the first notions of this art, so indispensable in the
+ordinary applications of poise.
+
+One good way is to look steadily, for several seconds at first and later
+on for several minutes at a time, at some object so small that the eye
+can remain fixt upon it without discomfort.
+
+For the latter reason it is better to choose something dark. A brilliant
+object will much more readily cause fatigue and dizziness.
+
+We have said for several seconds to begin with. It will be found a
+matter of sufficient difficulty to keep one's gaze fixt for much longer
+than this, when one is unaccustomed to this sort of exercise.
+
+One should endeavor to keep the two eyes open without winking. One
+should not open them too wide nor yet close them. The head should be
+kept steady and the pupils motionless.
+
+If this attempt causes the least wandering of the gaze or the slightest
+winking of the eyes, it must be begun over again.
+
+It is for this reason that at the start it will be found difficult to
+keep it up for more than a few seconds.
+
+After resting awhile one should repeat the exercise afresh, until the
+time comes when one can concentrate one's gaze in this way for at least
+four or five minutes of perfect fixity.
+
+In order to keep count of the time that is passing, as well as to keep
+control of one's will-power, it is advisable to count aloud in such a
+way that approximately one second elapses between the naming of every
+two numbers.
+
+When once fixity of gaze has been acquired, one can essay various other
+exercises, such as concentrating the eyes on an object and turning the
+head slowly to one side and the other without removing one's gaze from
+this point for a moment.
+
+It is not until one is very certain that the muscles of the eye have
+been thoroughly trained that one should undertake the mirror test.
+
+To do this, one must take up a position in front of a glass and fix
+one's gaze upon one's own pupils for a time. Then one must transfer it
+to the bridge of the nose, between the two eyes, and must strive to keep
+it there immovably.
+
+At first this exercise will not be found as easy as one might suppose.
+The magnetic power of the pupils is great and one will experience some
+slight difficulty in breaking away from it.
+
+For this reason it is a good plan to count out loud slowly up to a
+predetermined number, at which point the gaze should be at once
+transferred to the bridge of the nose.
+
+These exercises of the eye will be found particularly beneficial for
+people who are desirous of acquiring poise, as aside from the advantages
+we have specified, they have the effect of strengthening the will-power,
+which will be found to have materially gained by this means.
+
+When the desired result appears to have been accomplished and one feels
+oneself strong enough to meet or to avoid another person's eye, while at
+the same time one is conscious that one can dominate with one's own, it
+will be well to experiment upon the people with whom one is closely
+associated.
+
+One can thus become accustomed, little by little, to control one's gaze,
+to force an estimate of its influence, and to neutralize the effect of
+that of other people.
+
+
+THIRD SERIES--THE MOTIONS, THE CARRIAGE
+
+Another highly important point in the conquest of poise is the struggle
+against awkwardness, which is at once the parent and the offspring of
+timidity.
+
+Let us make ourselves clear.
+
+Many people only lack poise because they fear ridicule of their obvious
+embarrassment and of the awkward hesitation of their movements.
+
+Others fall into this embarrassment as the result of exhibitions of
+clumsiness in which they cover themselves with ridicule. The terror of
+renewing their moments of torture drives them into a reserve, from which
+they only emerge with a constraint so evident that it is reflected in
+their gestures, the evidences of a deplorable awkwardness.
+
+It is exceedingly simple to find a remedy for these unpleasant
+conditions. One must make up one's mind to combat their exhibitions of
+weakness by determining to acquire ease of movement.
+
+We have all noticed that awkwardness occurs only in public.
+
+The most embarrassed person in the world carries himself, when alone, in
+a fashion quite foreign to that which is the regret of his friends.
+
+It may happen, however, that awkwardness too long allowed to become a
+habit will have a disastrous effect upon our daily actions, and that the
+person who is lacking in poise will end by keeping up, even in private,
+the awkward gestures and uncouth movements that cause him eternal shame
+at his own expense.
+
+In such a case a cure will be a little more difficult to effect, but it
+can be arrived at, without a shadow of doubt, if our advice is
+faithfully followed out.
+
+It is an obvious truth that the repetition of any act diminishes the
+emotion it gave rise to in us at the first performance.
+
+Physical exercises are then in order, to achieve for us suppleness of
+movement and to extend its scope.
+
+Every morning, after our breathing exercises (which can be performed in
+bed between the moment of waking and that of getting up, according to
+our advice to those whose time is limited) it is absolutely necessary to
+devote five minutes to bodily exercises, the object of which is the
+acquirement of an easy carriage from the frequent repetition of certain
+movements.
+
+For instance, one should endeavor to expand the chest as far as
+possible, while throwing back the head and extending the arms, not by
+jerky movements but by a wide and rhythmical sweep, which should be
+every day made a little more extended.
+
+While doing this one should hollow the back so that it becomes a perfect
+arch.
+
+Then one should walk up and down the room, endeavoring to keep one's
+steps of even length and one's body erect.
+
+One should never allow these daily exercises to go unperformed on the
+pretext of lack of time.
+
+Five minutes of deep breathing and five minutes to practise the other
+movements advised will be sufficient, if one performs these tasks every
+day with regularity and conscientiousness.
+
+The speaking exercises, to which we shall now refer can be carried out
+while we are dressing.
+
+Choose a phrase, a short one to start with, and longer as you progress,
+and repeat it in front of the glass while observing yourself carefully,
+to be sure that your face shows no sign of embarrassment and that you do
+not stammer or hesitate in any way.
+
+If the words do not come out clearly, you must make an immediate stop
+and go doggedly back to the beginning of your phrase, until you are able
+to enunciate it with mechanical accuracy and without a single sign of
+hesitation.
+
+You must study to avoid all the jerky and abrupt movements which
+disfigure the address of the timid and deprive them of all the assurance
+that they should possess, for the reason that they can not help paying
+attention to their own lack of composure.
+
+Finally, from the moment of rising, as well as when brushing his hair,
+tying his necktie, or putting on his clothes, the man who desires to
+acquire poise will watch himself narrowly, with a view to making his
+movements more supple and to invest them with grace.
+
+Once in the street, he will not forget to carry his head erect, without
+exaggerating the pose, and will always walk with a firm step without
+looking directly ahead of him.
+
+If this attitude is a difficult one for him when commencing, he can, at
+the start, assign a certain time for observing this position, and
+gradually increase its length, until he feels no further inconvenience.
+
+The feeling of obvious awkwardness is a large factor in the lack of
+poise.
+
+It is then a matter of great importance to modify one's outward
+carriage, while at the same time applying oneself to the conquest of
+one's soul, so as to achieve the object not only of actually becoming a
+man who must be reckoned with, but of impressing every one with what one
+is, and what one is worth.
+
+
+FOURTH SERIES--SPEAKING EXERCISES
+
+Is it really necessary to point out what a weight readiness of speech
+has in bringing about the success of any undertaking?
+
+The man who can make a clever and forceful speech will always convince
+his hearers, whatever may be the cause he pleads.
+
+Do we not see criminals acquitted every day solely because of the
+eloquence of their lawyers?
+
+Have we not often been witnesses to the defeat of entirely honest people
+who, from lack of ability to put up a good argument, allow themselves to
+be convicted of negligence or of carelessness, if of nothing worse?
+
+Eloquence, or at least a certain facility of speech, is one of the gifts
+of the man of poise.
+
+One reason for this is that his mind is always fixt upon the object he
+wishes to attain by his arguments, which eliminates all wandering of the
+thoughts.
+
+But there is another reason, a purely physical one. The emotions
+experienced by the timid are quite unknown to him and he is not the
+victim of any of the physical inhibitions which, in affecting the
+clearness of their powers of speech, tend to reduce them to confusion.
+
+Stammering, stuttering, and all the other ordinary disabilities of the
+speaker, can almost without exception be attributed to timidity and to
+the nervousness of which it is the cause.
+
+We shall see in the next chapter how these defects can be cured.
+
+In this, which is devoted specially to physical exercises, we will give
+the mechanical means for overcoming these grave defects.
+
+Just as soon as the difficulties of utterance have been overcome, and
+one is no longer in terror of falling into a laughable blunder, and thus
+has no further reason to fear, when undertaking to speak, that one will
+be made fun of because the object of disconcerting mockery, one's ideas
+will cease to be dammed up by this haunting dread and can take shape in
+one's brain just as fast as one expresses them.
+
+Clearness of conception will be reflected in that of what we say, and
+poise will soon manifest itself in the manner of the man who no longer
+feels himself to be the object of ill-natured laughter.
+
+One should set oneself then every morning to the performance of
+exercises consisting of opening the mouth as wide as one possibly can
+and then shutting it, to open it once more to its fullest extent, and so
+on until one becomes fatigued.
+
+This exercise is designed to cover the well-known difficulty of those
+who speak infrequently and which is familiarly known as "heavy jaw."
+
+One should next endeavor to pronounce every consonant with the utmost
+distinctness.
+
+If certain consonants, as _s_, for example, or _ch_, are not enunciated
+clearly, one should keep at it until one pronounces them satisfactorily.
+
+Now one should construct short sentences containing as many difficult
+consonants as possible.
+
+Next we should apply ourselves to declaiming longer sentences.
+
+It will be of help to have these sentences constitute an affirmation of
+will-power and of poise.
+
+For example: "I can express myself with the greatest possible facility,
+because timidity and embarrassment are complete strangers to me."
+
+Or again: "I am a master of the art of clothing my thoughts in elegant
+and illuminating phrases, because stammering, stuttering, and all the
+other misfortunes that oppress the timid, are to me unknown quantities."
+
+We can not insist too strongly upon the cumulative effect of words which
+are constantly repeated. It is a good thing to impress oneself with
+forceful ideas that make for courage and for achievement.
+
+Distrust of self being the principal defect of the timid, the man who
+would acquire poise must bend every effort to banishing it from his
+thoughts.
+
+The repetition of these sentences, by building up conviction, will
+undoubtedly end by creating a confidence in oneself that will at first
+be hesitating, but will gradually acquire force. This is a great step in
+advance on the road toward poise.
+
+We are discussing, it should be understood, only such cases of
+difficulty in speaking as are directly traceable to an inherent
+timidity.
+
+If the inability to speak clearly comes from a physical malformation it
+should at once be brought to the attention of a specialist.
+
+It is well recognized that, in the majority of cases, those defects are
+the consequences of timidity, when they are not its direct cause.
+
+In combating them, then, with every means at his disposal, the man who
+desires to acquire poise will prove the logicality of his mind. It is a
+well-known axiom that effects are produced by causes, and _vice versa_.
+
+Thus, in the case we are considering, timidity either causes the
+difficulty in speaking or is caused by it. In the first condition as
+well as in the second, the disappearance of the one trouble depends upon
+the eradication of the other.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV
+
+PRACTICAL EXERCISES FOR OBTAINING POISE
+
+
+COMPOSURE
+
+One of the essential conditions of acquiring poise is to familiarize
+oneself with the habit of composure.
+
+Timid people know nothing of its advantages. They are always ill at
+ease, fearful, devoured by dread of other people's censures, and
+completely upset by the idea of the least initiative.
+
+Their mania leads them to exaggerate the smallest incident. A trifle
+puts them in a panic, and at the mere notion that strangers have
+perceived this they become quite out of countenance and are possest by
+but one idea, to avoid by flight the repetition of such unpleasant
+emotions.
+
+A quite useless attempt, for in whatever retirement people who lack
+poise may live, they will find themselves certainly the victims of the
+small embarrassments of every-day life, which, in their eyes, will soon
+take on the guise of disasters.
+
+Composure should, then, be the first achievement in the way of
+self-conquest to be aimed at by the man who is desirous of attaining
+poise.
+
+But, it will be objected, composure is a condition that is not familiar
+to everybody. It is a question of temperament and of disposition. Every
+one who wishes for it can not attain to it.
+
+This is an error. In order to possess composure, that is to say the
+first step in the mastery of self which enables one to judge of the
+proportions of things, it must be achieved, or developed, if we happen
+to be naturally inclined thereto.
+
+To accomplish this, deep-breathing exercises are often recommended by
+the philosophers of the new school.
+
+They advise those who are desirous of cultivating it to make no
+resolution, to commit themselves to no impulsive action, without first
+withdrawing into themselves and taking five or six deep breaths in the
+manner we have described in the preceding chapter.
+
+This has the physical effect of reducing the speed with which the heart
+beats and, as a result, of relaxing the mind and quieting one's nerves.
+
+During the two or three minutes thus employed one's enthusiasm wanes and
+one's ideas take on a less confused form. In a word, unreasoning
+impulses no longer fill the brain to the extent of inhibiting the
+entrance of sober second thought.
+
+But this is only an adventitious means of prevention. We will now speak
+of those which should become a matter of daily practise and whose
+frequent repetition will lead to the poise we seek.
+
+Every one whose profession makes it necessary to cultivate his memory
+recognizes the importance of studying at night. Phrases learned just
+before going to sleep fix themselves more readily in the mind. They
+remain latent in the brain and spring up anew in the morning without
+calling for much trouble to revive them.
+
+For this reason it is well to retire to rest in a mental attitude of
+deliberate calm, repressing every sort of jerky movement and
+constraining oneself to lie perfectly quiet.
+
+At the same time one should keep on repeating these words:
+
+"I am composed. I propose to be composed. I am composed!"
+
+The constant reiteration of these words constitute a species of
+suggestion, and peace will steal gradually into our souls and will
+permit us to think quietly, without the risk of becoming entangled in
+disordered fancies, or, what is far worse, falling a prey to vain and
+unavailing regrets.
+
+Those who doubt the efficacy of this proceeding can be readily convinced
+by proving to them the tremendous power of mere words.
+
+Certain of these electrify us. Such words as patriotism, revolt, blood,
+always produce in us an emotion of enthusiasm or disgust.
+
+Others again are productive of color, and one must admit that the
+constant repetition of an assurance ultimately leads to the creation of
+the condition that it pictures to us.
+
+But to make the assertion to oneself, "I am composed," is not all that
+is necessary. One must prove to oneself that one is not glossing over
+the truth.
+
+The readiest means of accomplishing this, which is open to every one who
+has any regular interests, is to mentally review the words and the
+actions of the day, and to pass judgment upon them from the point of
+view of the quality one is striving to attain.
+
+
+DAILY SELF-EXAMINATION
+
+One should convince oneself as soon as possible of the truth of the fact
+that sincerity toward oneself is a large factor in attaining that
+firmness of judgment that must be cultivated by the man who is in search
+of poise.
+
+In order to reach this condition nothing is more easy than to pass in
+mental review, every evening, the events that have marked the day that
+has passed.
+
+In a word, one should strive to relive it, honestly confessing to
+oneself all the mistakes that have crept into it.
+
+Every unfortunate speech should be recalled. One should formulate fresh
+replies, that lack of poise did not permit us to make at the time, so
+that under similar circumstances we may not be again caught at a
+disadvantage.
+
+The witty name of "doorstep repartee" has been given to these answers
+which one makes as afterthoughts, with the idea of expressing the
+embarrassment of the man who can find no arguments until he finds
+himself beyond the reach of his opponents. It is after one has gone out,
+when one is on the doorstep, that one suddenly recognizes what one ought
+to have said, and finds the phrases that one should have used, the exact
+retort that one might have hurled at one's antagonist.
+
+The man who has acquired poise should still accustom himself to practise
+this force of mental gymnastics when making his daily self-examination.
+
+It will strengthen him for future contests by teaching him just how to
+conduct himself.
+
+He must be always on his guard against one of the obsessions that too
+often afflict the timid--the mania for extremes.
+
+The nature of a timid person is essentially artificial. His character is
+unequal.
+
+He yearns for perfection, yet it is painful for him to meet it in
+others. He suffers also because he has failed to acquire it himself.
+
+Sometimes he is his own most severe judge and then on other occasions he
+is grossly indulgent to his faults.
+
+His isolation causes him to construct ideals that can not possibly be
+realized in ordinary life. But he is more than ready to blame those who
+fall short of them, while making no effort to duplicate their struggles.
+
+He makes the sad mistake, as we have seen in the chapter on effrontery,
+of taking all his chimeras for realities and is angry at his inability
+to make other people see them in the same light.
+
+He is, moreover, of a very trustful disposition and prone to the making
+of confidences. But when he attempts them his infirmity prevents him and
+he suffers under the inhibition.
+
+All his mental processes, as we have seen, tend toward hypochondria,
+unless his sense of truth can be called into play.
+
+One can easily see then that this daily self-examination can be made
+quite a difficult affair by all these conflicting tendencies.
+
+It is for this very reason that it is so necessary that this examination
+should be rigorously undertaken every day and with all the good faith of
+which we are possest.
+
+It is because they do not ignore their own weaknesses that the men
+endowed with poise become what one has psychologically termed "forces,"
+that is to say people who are masters of a power that renders them
+superior to the rest of the world.
+
+
+RESOLUTION
+
+After as minute and as honest an examination as we can make of our own
+actions, it will be of great benefit to make definite resolutions for
+the morrow.
+
+This is a matter of great importance.
+
+The timid man, by seriously resolving to perform the actions that he
+ought and by planning the accomplishment of some definite step, will
+unconsciously strengthen his own will-power.
+
+He will increase it still more by making up his mind to leave no stone
+unturned to conquer himself.
+
+For instance, he proposes to make a certain journey, or to pay a certain
+call, which he dreads very much, and falls asleep while repeating to
+himself: "To-morrow I will go there! I will carry the thing through with
+assurance!"
+
+Conceding the magnetic power of words, the acquisition of courage and of
+confidence are necessary corollaries.
+
+Ideas imprest upon the mind at the moment that one is falling asleep
+develop during the night by a species of incubation, and on the morrow
+present themselves to us quite naturally in the guise of a duty much
+less hard to perform than we had imagined.
+
+In the case where such a resolution awakens an unpleasant emotion in the
+hearts of the timid, they should repeat earnestly the sentences that
+tend to composure and should seek the aid of the means we have indicated
+for attaining it.
+
+
+PREPARATION
+
+In order to strengthen one's resolution it is a good thing every morning
+to map out one's day, for the purpose of acquiring poise.
+
+All one's combinations should be worked out with this valuable conquest
+in mind.
+
+After having committed oneself to a definite plan, one should analyze
+each one of the proposed steps, carefully taking into account all the
+peculiarities that are likely to characterize them.
+
+If one is to have an interview, one should carefully prepare one's
+introductory remarks, paying particular attention to one's line of
+action, to one's method of presentation, and the words upon which one
+relies to obtain an affirmative reply to one's request.
+
+One should take the precaution to have one's speeches mentally prepared
+in advance, so as to be able to deliver them in such a speedy and
+convincing fashion that one does not find oneself in a state of
+embarrassment fatal to recollecting them.
+
+It is better to make them as short as possible. One is then much less
+likely to become confused and will not be so much in dread of stammering
+or stuttering, which are always accompaniments of the fear of being left
+without an idea of what to say next.
+
+Besides this, long speeches are always irritating, and it is a sign of
+great lack of address to allow oneself to acquire the reputation of
+being a bore.
+
+To make sure of one's facial expression and gestures it may be well to
+repeat one's speeches in front of a mirror.
+
+One can then enact one's entry into the room in such a way as to foresee
+even the most insignificant details, so that the fear of making a
+failure at the start will no longer have a bad effect upon one.
+
+We have heard of a man who was so lacking in poise that he lost his
+situation because, when summoned by his chief, he became so confused
+that he forgot to leave his streaming umbrella in the outer office.
+
+It was an extremely wet day, and the unfortunate man, instead of being
+able to plead his cause effectively, became hopelessly embarrassed at
+perceiving his mistake, the results of which, it is needless to state,
+were by no means to the benefit of the floor.
+
+His despair at the sight of the rivulets that, running from his
+umbrella, spread themselves over the polished surface of the wood,
+prevented him from thinking of anything but his unpardonable stupidity.
+His native awkwardness became all the worse at this and, utterly unable
+to proffer any but the most confused excuses, he fled from the office of
+his chief leaving the latter in a high state of irritation.
+
+He was replaced by some one else at the first opportunity, on the
+pretext that the direction of important affairs could no longer be left
+in the hands of a man of such notorious incapacity.
+
+It should be added that this man was more than ordinarily intelligent
+and that his successor was by no means his equal.
+
+It is, therefore, absolutely necessary for those who are lacking in
+presence of mind to accustom themselves to a species of rehearsal before
+undertaking any really important step.
+
+Does this imply that they must think of nothing but weighty affairs and
+neglect occasions for social meetings?
+
+By no means. To those who are distrustful of themselves every occasion
+is a pretext for avoiding action.
+
+They should, therefore, take pains to seek every possible opportunity of
+cultivating poise.
+
+The entering of a theater; the walking into a drawing-room; the
+acknowledging of a woman's bow; every one of these things should be for
+them a subject of careful study, and if, when evening comes, the daily
+self-examination leaves them satisfied with themselves, it will be a
+cause of much encouragement to them.
+
+If, on the other hand, they have received a rebuff due to their lack of
+poise, they should carefully examine into the reasons for this, in order
+to guard against such an occurrence in the future.
+
+A good preparatory exercise is to choose those of our friends whose
+homes are unpretentious and who have few callers.
+
+Let us make up our minds to pay them a visit, which, in view of the
+quietude of its associations, is not likely to awaken in us any grave
+emotions.
+
+To carry this off well we should make all our preparations in advance.
+
+One should say to oneself: "I will enter like this," while rehearsing
+one's entrance, so as not to be caught napping at the outset.
+
+One should go on to plan one's opening remarks, an easy enough matter
+since one will be speaking to people one knows very well.
+
+One should then decide as to the length of one's call.
+
+One makes up one's mind, for instance, to get up and say good-by at the
+end of a quarter of an hour.
+
+One should foresee the rejoinder of one's host, whether sincere or
+merely polite, which will urge one to prolong one's visit, and for this
+purpose should have ready a plausible excuse, such as work to do or a
+business engagement, and one should prepare beforehand the phrase
+explaining this.
+
+Finally, one should study to make one's good-bys gracefully.
+
+It might be as well, while we are at it, to prepare a subject of
+conversation.
+
+Generally speaking, the events of the day form the topic of discussion
+on such visits, whose good-will does not always prevent a certain amount
+of boredom.
+
+It will be, then, an easy matter to prepare a few remarks on the
+happenings of the day, on the plays that are running, or on the salient
+occurrences of the week.
+
+It should be added that these remarks should express opinions of such a
+nature as not to wound anybody's feelings.
+
+The man who seeks the conquest of poise will not expose himself to the
+risk of being involved in a discussion in which he will be compelled
+either to remain silent or to make an exhibition of himself.
+
+To do this would be to strike a serious blow at his resolution to
+persevere.
+
+The one idea of the aspirant to poise should be above all things never
+to risk a failure.
+
+Such a check will rarely be a partial one. It will have a marked effect
+upon his proposed plan of educating his will-power by again giving rise
+to that confusion which is always lurking in the background of the
+thoughts of the timid and which is, moreover, the source of all their
+ills.
+
+Another wise precaution consists in foreseeing objections and in
+preparing such answers as will enable one to refute them.
+
+Eloquence is one of the most useful achievements of poise; it is also
+the gift that best aids one to acquire it.
+
+It is, therefore, indispensable to train oneself to speak in a refined
+and correct manner.
+
+The man who is sure of his oratorical powers will never be at a loss. He
+will find conviction growing while he seeks to create it.
+
+We spoke in the preceding chapter of the mechanical exercises necessary
+to make speaking an easy matter.
+
+We must not forget, however, that before one can speak one has to think.
+
+Words will spring of themselves to our lips the moment we have a
+definite conception of the idea they serve to present. As a proof of
+this contention one has only to cite the case of those persons who,
+while ordinarily experiencing great difficulty in expressing themselves,
+become suddenly clear, persuasive, and even eloquent when it comes to
+discussing a subject in which they are deeply interested.
+
+The study of the art of speaking will become, then, for people of
+timidity, over and above the mechanical exercises that we have
+prescribed in a former chapter, a profound analysis of the subject upon
+which they are likely to be called upon to express themselves.
+
+One should strive to describe things in short sentences as elegantly
+phrased as possible.
+
+When the idea we wish to convey seems to be exprest in a confused
+fashion, one should not hesitate to seek for a change of phraseology
+that will make it more concise and clear.
+
+But above all--above all, we must pull ourselves up short and begin over
+again if any tendency to stammer, to hesitate, or to become confused,
+begins to manifest itself.
+
+Just as soon as one feels more at one's ease one can seek to put in
+practise all these special studies.
+
+Nothing is quite so disconcerting as the idea of stammering or stopping
+short.
+
+For this reason it is imperative that one should begin all over again
+the moment such an accident occurs.
+
+This is what prevents timid people from accomplishing anything. From the
+moment of the first failure they become panic-stricken and can no longer
+go on speaking connectedly.
+
+Those who would acquire poise must act quite otherwise.
+
+Instead of avoiding occasions of speaking in public, they should seek
+for them. But first of all they must make some trials upon audiences who
+are in sympathy with them.
+
+They should experiment upon their own families and should never fail to
+enlarge upon their theme. If need be, they can prepare the matter for a
+short address or a friendly argument.
+
+If they find themselves stammering or panic-stricken, they must strive
+to recall the phrase that caused the trouble and endeavor to repeat it
+very emphatically without stuttering.
+
+For the rest, it is always a dangerous thing to talk too fast. Words
+that are pronounced more slowly are always much better articulated, and
+in speaking leisurely one is more likely to avoid the embarrassment in
+talking that attacks those whose education in the direction of the
+acquiring of poise is not yet complete.
+
+One of the most important exercises in the search for poise consists in
+accustoming oneself to speak slowly and very distinctly.
+
+If one stammers in the least degree, especially if this fault is due to
+nervousness, one should begin again at the word which caused the
+trouble, pronouncing each syllable slowly and distinctly. Then one
+should incorporate it in one or two sentences and should not cease to
+utter it until one can enunciate it clearly and without any trouble.
+
+In order to combine theory with practise, one should seek opportunities
+for entering public assemblies, striving to do so without awkwardness.
+
+One should choose the time when the audience is not yet fully arrived,
+since, unless one is very sure of oneself, it is a risky matter to
+appear upon the scene when the house is full, or the guests for the most
+part assembled. By this means one is much more likely to be able to
+emerge victorious from the ordeal of the stares of the curious.
+
+The man endowed with poise enters a gathering politely yet
+indifferently, ordering his manner not to suit the particular occasion
+but as a matter of instinct. He will go naturally to those whom he
+happens to know, will shake hands with them, and will say to each one
+the thing that he ought to say.
+
+If a mother he will ask news of her children. He will offer
+congratulations to the man who has just been publicly honored. Presence
+of mind will not desert him for a moment; he will commit no blunders. He
+will avoid the necessity of meeting a former friend with whom he has
+fallen out and will pass him without speaking. He will not talk of
+deformities to a man who is deformed. In a word, his poise, while
+leaving him free to exercise all his faculties, will give him the
+opportunity to remember a thousand details, the performance as well as
+the omission of which will create much sympathetic feeling toward him
+among the people whom he meets.
+
+The man who does not yet possess poise, will be wise if he follows the
+recommendations we have made, that is by preparing his speeches to be
+made upon entering. In those cases where he is not absolutely sure of
+the relationship of people or of the condition of health of the person
+to whom he is speaking, he had better avoid these topics. Silence is not
+infrequently an indication of poise.
+
+
+THE THOUGHT OF SUCCESS
+
+But to emerge successfully from all these difficulties, one must believe
+that one can do it, banishing absolutely from one's mind the doubt,
+that, like leprosy, attacks the most well-made resolutions, transforming
+them into hurtful indecision.
+
+The mere thought, "_I will succeed_," is in itself a condition of
+success. The man who pronounces these words with absolute belief implies
+this sentence: "I will succeed because I will succeed and because I am
+determined to employ every legitimate means to that end!"
+
+Avoid also all grieving or melancholy over past failures, or, if you
+must be occupied with them, let it be without mingling bitterness with
+your regrets.
+
+Say to yourself: "It is true. I failed in that undertaking. But from
+this moment I propose to think of it merely to remind myself of the
+reasons why I failed.
+
+"I wish to analyze them sincerely, while recognizing where I was in the
+wrong, so that under similar circumstances I can avoid the repetition of
+the same mistakes."
+
+Fools and knaves are the only people who complain of fate.
+
+The words "I have no luck" should be erased altogether from the
+vocabulary of the man who proposes to acquire poise.
+
+It is the excuse in which weaklings and cowards indulge.
+
+Timid people are always complaining of the injustice of fate, without
+stopping to think that they have themselves been the direct causes of
+their own failures.
+
+The violet has often been quoted--and very improperly--as an example of
+shrinking modesty which it would be well to imitate.
+
+It does not in the least trouble the phrase-makers and the followers of
+the ideas that they have spread broadcast through the world that the
+violet which hides timidly behind its sheltering leaves nearly always
+dies unnoticed, and that it is in most cases anemic and faded in color.
+The type that wins the admiration of the world is that, which,
+disengaging itself from its leafy shield, springs up with a bound above
+its green foliage just as men of poise rise triumphantly above the
+accidents and the petty details which bury the timid under their heavy
+fronds.
+
+If one were minded to carry out the comparison properly, it is far more
+exact to liken the timid to these degenerate flowers, which are indebted
+to the shade in which they hide for their puny and abortive appearance.
+
+The timid have then no sort of excuse for complaining of their ill-luck.
+
+To begin with, it is to their own defects solely that their obscurity is
+due.
+
+Furthermore, by ceaselessly complaining, they gradually become absorbed
+by these ideas of ill-fortune, which grow to be their accomplices in
+their detestation of effort and suggest to them the thought of
+attempting nothing upon the absurd pretext that nothing they do can
+succeed.
+
+One must add here--and this is extremely important--that in acting in
+this way they always manage to provoke the hostile forces that are
+dormant in everything and that array themselves the more readily against
+such people because of their lack of the resolution to combat them and
+the energy to overcome them.
+
+This is the reason why people who are gifted with poise find themselves
+better qualified than others to succeed.
+
+Their faith is so beautiful and so convincing that it compels conviction
+in others and seems to be able to dominate events.
+
+It is by no means an illusion to believe in the worth of this
+confidence. People to whom it is given become of the most wonderful help
+to others, their faith aiding and sustaining that of those who have
+resolved to make an effort.
+
+However strong the soul of man may be, it is nevertheless subject to
+hours of discouragement, to moments of despair, in which some comfort
+and sympathy are needed.
+
+The man of resolution will recover from his failures the more easily the
+more certain he is that he has created in those about him an atmosphere
+of friendliness which will not allow his defeats to be made public.
+
+As mists are dispelled at the approach of the sun, the agony of doubt
+will disappear in the genial warmth of the encouragement and the
+confidence that his poise and self-reliance have built up in those
+around him, and a sure faith will be given to him, the certain and
+faithful guide to the road that leads onward to success.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V
+
+THE SUPREME ACHIEVEMENT
+
+
+One must be most careful not to credit oneself with the possession of
+poise while one is unable to encounter reverses without loss of
+serenity.
+
+Every setback of this sort must be judged without bias and the proper
+measures must be taken to prevent its recurrence.
+
+Every exuberant gesture, as well as every constrained and abortive
+movement, must be the object of redoubled attention.
+
+This is the stumbling-block that brings so many timid people to grief.
+They imagine that they have achieved the conquest of poise, while they
+are really only deceiving themselves by the idea that they are giving a
+good illustration of it. They become the victims of a peculiar type of
+delusion akin to that of the cowards who deliberately invite danger
+while trembling in every limb.
+
+The very fear of being considered cowards causes them to plunge into it
+blindly without taking the trouble to reflect. They always overshoot the
+mark, exposing themselves quite uselessly and achieving a result that is
+entirely valueless to themselves or any one else.
+
+The man who is really master of himself will avoid such foolish
+undertakings, retaining his powers for those that are likely to bear
+fruit, whatever the quality of the success may be.
+
+It is an act of folly to deny the possibility of success because one is
+discouraged at the very first obstacle.
+
+The greatest triumphs are never achieved without a struggle. The man who
+obtains them does so only by virtue of the experience gained by repeated
+efforts, none of which bore for him the fruit he desired.
+
+The better is merely a step along the road to the best.
+
+Perfection is, therefore, the result of many half successes.
+
+If one could hope to arrive at one stride at one's desired goal one's
+efforts would be of no value, and mediocrity would very soon become the
+sole characteristic of those who were possest by this idea. The man who
+has had the wit to acquire poise will guard himself carefully from
+falling into the error of the timid, who, haunted by an unappeased
+longing for perfection, lose their courage at the first attempt.
+
+Does this imply that idealism must be banished from the thoughts of the
+man of resolution?
+
+Not at all, if by the word ideal one understands what it actually means.
+
+A false meaning has been given to this word which has warped it from its
+original sense.
+
+The ideal is not, as many people seem to think, an impossible dream
+indulged in only by poets, and that has no active basis of reality.
+
+Lazy people abuse this word, which to their minds allows them to indulge
+without shame in idle dreams that foster their indolence.
+
+The timid drape it about themselves like a curtain, behind which they
+take refuge and in whose shadow they conceal themselves, thinking by so
+doing to keep the vanity which obsesses them from being wounded.
+
+Devotees of false ideals clothe them too often with the tinsel of fond
+illusion, under which guise they make a pretense of worshiping them.
+
+The true ideal, that which every man can carry in his heart, is
+something much more tangible and matter of fact.
+
+For one it is worldly success.
+
+For another renown and glory.
+
+For men of action it is the end for which they strive.
+
+The ideal which each man should cultivate and strive after need by no
+means be a narrow aim.
+
+It is an aspiration of which the loftiness is in no way affected by the
+lowliness of the means employed to realize it.
+
+This word has too often been misused and exaggerated in the effort to
+distort it from its philosophical meaning.
+
+In every walk of life, no matter how humble, it is possible to follow an
+ideal.
+
+It is not an aim, to speak exactly, but still less is it a dream. It is
+an aspiration toward something better that subordinates all our acts to
+this one dominant desire.
+
+Every realization tends to the development of the ideal, which is
+increased in beauty by each partial attainment.
+
+We have just said that the ideal of some men is the acquisition of a
+fortune. It might be supposed, therefore, that such people, once they
+have become rich, will abandon their aspirations for something more.
+
+The man who has this idea is very much in the wrong.
+
+The state of being permanently wealthy is one that opens new horizons,
+hitherto closed. The doing of good, charity, the desire to better the
+condition of those who still have to struggle, these will constitute a
+higher and a no less attractive ideal.
+
+This does not take into consideration the instinct, innate in every
+heart--and that the genius of the race has made a part of every one of
+us--the desire of progressing.
+
+It is this desire that forms the ideal of fathers of families, building
+up the futures of their children, in whom they see not only their
+immediate successors, but those who are to continue their race, which
+they wish to be a strong and virile one, in obedience to the eternal
+desire for perpetuating themselves that haunts the hearts of men.
+
+It is quite evident that each gain has no need of being complete to bear
+fruit. The thing to do is to multiply it, to make something more of it,
+and to take it home to ourselves, in order to achieve the ultimate
+result that is termed success.
+
+The man of resolution appreciates this fact perfectly, rejoicing in
+every victory and taking each defeat as a means for gaining experience
+that he will be able to use to his advantage when the occasion arises.
+
+The man of timidity, on the other hand, haunted by this desire for
+perfection, cut off by his very aloofness from all chance of learning
+the lesson of events, will be so thoroughly discouraged at the first
+check, that he will draw back from any similar experience, preferring to
+take refuge in puerile grumbling against the contrariety of things in
+general.
+
+This attitude of mind can not outlast a few minutes of sensible
+reflection.
+
+We wish to convey by the use of this term the idea of a process of
+thought quite free from those vague dreams which are the sure
+indications of feebleness, reveries in which things appear to us in a
+guise which is by no means that which they really possess.
+
+The main characteristic of this state of mind is to exaggerate one's
+disappointments while ignoring one's moments of happiness.
+
+It approximates very closely to the old fable of the crumpled rose-leaf
+breaking the rest of the sybarite on his couch of silk.
+
+He has no thought of taking satisfaction or pleasure in the luxury that
+surrounds him. He does not congratulate himself on his wealth, nor upon
+the comforts he possesses and that he values so highly. He thinks of
+nothing but the little crumpled petal which causes him imaginary
+distress, and all his faculties are absorbed by this petty detail.
+
+The man of resolve will pay no attention to such trifles as this. They
+will touch him not at all unless they assume the role of the grain of
+sand in the working-parts of a machine, which prevents it from running.
+He is wise enough to be able to estimate a situation sensibly, taking
+account of the drawbacks but at the same time realizing all the
+advantages that accrue from it.
+
+At these advantages he will be pleased and will seek to get the maximum
+of good out of each one of them. If he thinks of the disadvantages at
+all, it will be merely in order to find a way to diminish them and to
+rob them of their power to harm him.
+
+Such are the benefits of reflection and of concentration which, when
+practised in a rational manner, will do more than anything else to help
+one to the attainment of poise.
+
+Weak indulgence toward one's own failings will be rejected by the
+strong. To know oneself thoroughly is a good way to improve oneself, and
+the knowledge that one is not mistaken as to one's actual merits is of
+considerable help in acquiring poise.
+
+It is for this reason that the habit of daily self-examination, that we
+recommended in the preceding chapter, develops, in the man who submits
+himself to it, faculties of judgment so keen that it is an easy matter
+for him to become his own educator in the path to betterment.
+
+One great disadvantage of lack of proper concentration is that it gives
+to the subject one is anxious to study an importance greater than it
+really has.
+
+Passion is too often an accompaniment of this form of reflection,
+emotions are aroused, and the nerves become active factors in distorting
+the real meanings and value of the things we are considering.
+
+The remedy in this case is a very simple one. An effort of will, will
+readily banish the subject which is causing us too profound emotion by
+the simple process of turning the thoughts to some subject that will
+cause us no such disturbances.
+
+Later on, when the emotions of the moment have passed, one can return to
+the former train of thought, forcing oneself to examine it with
+calmness.
+
+Some amount of practise will be needed to acquire this mastery of one's
+thoughts, the parent of poise, which is nothing more than courage based
+upon solid reason.
+
+It may happen that the desire to follow a line of thought that causes us
+excessive emotion may lead to the inroad of a horde of secondary ideas,
+which press one upon the other without any perceptible continuity,
+carrying with them neither conviction nor illumination.
+
+Reveries of this sort are dangerous enemies of poise. They lead one
+nowhere, and create in us habits which are not controlled by reason or
+common sense.
+
+If such thoughts should assail us, the sole means of avoiding injury
+from them is to repulse them instantly, the moment one becomes conscious
+of them, and to banish the chaos of scattered fancies by devoting one's
+whole mind to a single dominant thought that should be associated with
+the determination to obtain the mastery over oneself.
+
+We have already suggested to the timid the advantage of foreseeing the
+objections that are likely to be made to what they may say. The mere
+fact that they have already formulated a mental answer will be a great
+assistance to the making of a successful retort.
+
+To avoid still further risks of being confronted by a contradiction that
+may put them at a loss they will do well to adopt the following plan.
+
+Let them put themselves in the place of the person to whom they plan to
+speak and then ask themselves if, under these circumstances, they will
+not find some objection to offer to the proposition concerned.
+
+If they discover by this means that, in his place, they would be likely
+to find such and such difficulties, it must be with this fact in their
+minds that they devote themselves to the better preparation of their
+arguments or, if necessary, to modifying the force if not the content of
+the reasoning upon which they rely to carry conviction.
+
+These objections, as we have already advised, should be uttered aloud,
+so that we may the better perceive their logic, and also to allow of our
+repeating them a second time, the ability to accomplish which will be a
+great encouragement to us.
+
+There is no reason, in fact, for believing that we can not repeat on the
+morrow, just as perfectly as we have exprest it to-day, a statement that
+we have made with clearness both of reasoning and of diction.
+
+Contact with men and with affairs should be sought after by the aspirant
+for poise.
+
+He will be the gainer by watching the destruction of his exaggerated
+ideas and his false conceptions, which have all arisen from solitary
+thought.
+
+An essential point is to become accustomed to the necessity for action.
+
+Far from avoiding this, one should seize every occasion to utilize it to
+one's advantage.
+
+The determined student should even create opportunity for so doing,
+which, in forcing him to break down his reserve, will make it necessary
+for him to come to definite decisions and to carry them out.
+
+Every chance to exhibit real and honest activity should be seized by
+him.
+
+Between two decisions, equally favorable to him, of which one will leave
+him to his peaceful retirement and the other will involve active
+measures, he should not hesitate for a moment.
+
+He will make choice of that which will compel him to exhibit physical
+activity.
+
+It is, however, important that manifestation of purposeless energy
+should be rigidly represt. They are always harmful to one's equilibrium
+and to the qualities needed for the attainment of poise.
+
+One should never forget the well-known proverb:
+
+"Speech is silver, but silence is golden."
+
+Silence, in a vast number of instances, is the indisputable proof of the
+empire that one has over oneself.
+
+To be able to keep quiet and to close one's lips until the moment when
+reflection has enabled us to discipline our too-violent emotions, is a
+quality that belongs only to those who have obtained the mastery over
+themselves.
+
+The weak become excited, indulge in protests, and expend themselves in
+angry denunciations that use up the energy they should retain for active
+measures.
+
+The man of resolution is most careful not to allow it to be known at
+what point he has been wounded. He keeps silence and reflects.
+
+Resolves form within his mind and, when he at last is ready to speak, it
+is to utter some firm decision or to put forward arguments that are
+unanswerable.
+
+To tell the truth, those who instantly and noisily voice their
+antagonisms, who, under the sting of a hurt to their vanity indulge in
+threats of violence, are actually dangerous.
+
+Their accusations, dictated by anger and heightened by the sense of
+their own inferiority, are always characterized by impotence.
+
+They make people smile, provoke perhaps a little pity, but never cause
+any fear.
+
+They are like the toy guns of children, which have the air of being most
+deadly weapons, but which are constructed of such fragile materials that
+a vigorous blow will cause them to fall to pieces.
+
+The self-control of the man of resolution in the face of insult and
+provocation is far more impressive than these idle threats.
+
+His silence is ominous. It is a sort of mechanical calm which produces
+decisions from which all passion is excluded.
+
+His answers, well thought out and adapted exactly to the circumstances
+of the case, impress one by their coldness and by their tone of
+finality. His words are always followed by deeds, and are the more
+weighty for the fact that one knows that they are merely preliminary to
+the actions that they foretell.
+
+This is one of the marked advantages of those who possess poise, one of
+various methods of conquering and dominating the minds of others.
+
+There are other strong points belonging to those who cultivate poise,
+which, judiciously employed, unite in giving them an incontestable
+superiority over the majority of the people they meet.
+
+The man of poise will not be overgay or too boisterous. Still less will
+he be taciturn. Moody people are nearly always those who are convinced
+of their own lack of ability and quite certain that the rest of the
+world is in a conspiracy to make them miserable.
+
+They lack all pride and make no bones about admitting themselves to be
+defeated.
+
+These, we must admit, are rather difficult conditions in which to effect
+anything worth while.
+
+In "Timidity: How to Overcome It," M.B. Dangennes tells us that one day
+a party of men agreed to undertake a journey, the object of which was to
+attain a most wonderful country.
+
+"There were a great many of them at the start, but only a few days had
+passed when their ranks became sensibly depleted.
+
+"Certain members of the party, the timid ones, who were encumbered with
+a load of useless scruples, soon succumbed to the weight of their
+burdens.
+
+"Others, the fearful ones, became panic-stricken at the difficulties
+they encountered in battling with the earlier stages of the journey.
+
+"The modest, after several days' marching, fell to the rear, from fear
+of attracting too much attention, and were very soon lost sight of.
+
+"The careless, wearied by their efforts, took to resting in the ditches
+along the road, and ate all their store of provisions for the journey
+without worrying at all about the time when they might be hungry.
+
+"The braggarts and the boasters, after exhibiting a temporary
+enthusiasm, gave out at the first dangers encountered on the march.
+
+"The curious, instead of striving to maintain the courage of those who
+walked at the head of the column, kept leading them into difficulties,
+in which many of the foremost were lost.
+
+"The rash were greatly reduced in numbers by their own foolhardiness.
+
+"The final result was that only a handful of men, after many weary days
+and nights, reached the Eden that they had set out to attain.
+
+"These men were disciples of energy, those to whom this virtue had given
+courage, ambition, the self-control and the self-mastery needed to
+vanquish and overcome the perils of the way; those who, by their cool
+and courageous bearing, had been able to impress upon their companions,
+now become their disciples, the indomitable hardihood with which they
+were themselves filled."
+
+We see in this fable how all the qualities of poise worked together for
+the accomplishment of the destined end.
+
+First courage, which must not be confounded either with rashness or with
+effrontery.
+
+Courage, the perfect manifestation of confidence in oneself.
+
+This quality is at the bottom of all great enterprises, of which all the
+risks, however, have been carefully considered in advance.
+
+The man of courage does not deceive himself as to the dangers of the
+deeds he has determined to perform. He accepts them bravely. He has
+foreseen them all, and he knows how to act in order to turn them to his
+own advantage.
+
+The coolness characteristic of all men of poise gives them the power of
+estimating wisely how things are likely to turn out.
+
+They do not fail to appreciate the importance of certain circumstances,
+to realize their bearing, and to admit the dangers to which they may
+give rise. Thus they are ready for the fray and are armed at all points
+for a well-considered defense.
+
+Shame on the superficial people who close their eyes in order not to see
+the obstacles that their own lack of foresight has prevented them from
+anticipating.
+
+Let us press back the timid; declare war on the boasters; show our
+contempt for the inveterately modest (who are only so to flatter their
+own vanity); express our hatred of the envious, who are always
+incapable; distrust the slothful; and arm ourselves with a justifiable
+pride, which, by imparting to us a sense of our merits, will enable us
+to acquire poise, true index of those who are legitimately sure of
+themselves and are conscious of their sterling worth.
+
+But, above all, let us raise in our inmost hearts a temple to reason,
+the author of that quiet confidence that makes success a certainty.
+
+This is the work of the man who has achieved the conquest of poise. It
+is the one particular evidence of this priceless quality.
+
+Poise, by inspiring its possessor with a belief in his merits, that is
+productive of good resolutions, enables him to employ in relation to
+himself the fine art of absolutely sincere reasoning.
+
+There are, as is well-known, many ways of looking at things.
+
+Every thing has several sides and, in accordance with the angle at which
+we examine it, seems to us more or less favorable.
+
+The superficial man only sees things, and only _wants_ to see them, from
+the viewpoint of his own desires.
+
+To the morose man all their contours appear distorted.
+
+The optimist, on the contrary, carefully changes their outlines.
+
+Only to the man who makes a practise of rational thinking comes a true
+vision of both the good and the bad that exist in everything.
+
+This science of reasoning is the base of all deductive processes, that,
+in strengthening the judgment, aid in the formation of poise.
+
+Without reason the scaffolding of the most splendid resolves falls to
+the ground.
+
+Without reason we wander aimlessly in bypaths instead of following the
+broad highway.
+
+Without reason, in short, we become guilty of injustice, not only toward
+others, but still more toward ourselves, since we can not form a correct
+estimate of our own characters.
+
+It is reason which enables us to choose the happy mean that leaves the
+country of fear to reach the goal of reserve, and follows it to the
+extreme limit of poise without ever encroaching upon the territory of
+effrontery.
+
+It is poise alone that enables us to communicate to others the qualities
+which we possess.
+
+This has ever been the gift of men of genius, of those who could enforce
+their doctrines and impose them upon others by the sheer strength of
+their attitude and the way in which they analyzed and reasoned out all
+their principles.
+
+What conviction can he hope to carry to his hearers who is not himself
+persuaded of the truth of the theories he is presenting?
+
+This is the condition of those timid people who give their advice in the
+same tone they would use to ask it.
+
+For this reason they never become expert. They rarely ever taste of
+success and usually sink into a state of discontent and envy.
+
+This last fault is nearly always indulged in by the timid, whom it
+soothes, not simply because of its maliciousness, but because envy seems
+to them to condone their own inertia by giving them an excuse for their
+lack of action.
+
+For people of mediocre mentality to deny the intelligence of others is
+to bring them down into their own plane and saves them the effort of
+climbing to that of their superiors.
+
+And since lack of sincerity toward themselves is always one of the
+faults of those who are wanting in poise, they can not help feeling a
+sentiment of jealousy toward those who have succeeded where they
+themselves have failed.
+
+Instead of doing justice without bitterness to the superiority of others
+by a determination to imitate it, they take the simpler course of
+envying the good fortune of their neighbors and attribute it all to
+luck.
+
+Whenever you hear any one expatiating upon what he calls the luck of
+some one else, you may be sure that he is a person entirely deficient in
+those qualities which could attract what he calls luck, but what is
+really, in the majority of cases, merely the result of hard work based
+upon a reasoned poise.
+
+Here we may add that this quality is often the key to good fortune,
+since it permits the head of a family, who is possest of it to establish
+about him sympathetic currents, based upon the confidence that he
+inspires.
+
+It is a matter of common knowledge how courage communicates itself from
+one to another.
+
+The man who dreads the idea of doing something will attempt it without
+hesitation if he finds himself supported by some one who seems to have
+no doubt as to the happy outcome of the enterprise.
+
+It is, therefore, most essential, in order to exercise a beneficent
+influence upon his household, that the head of a family should be
+possest of poise, which will awaken in them a sense of protection, while
+at the same time making them aware of a kindly authority.
+
+It must not be inferred from this that every head of a family should
+pose as being infallible.
+
+This would be a most foolish proceeding on his part. It would often
+happen that circumstances, by proving his predictions untrue, would
+destroy the faith in him that those in his household must possess.
+
+It is only the presumptuous and the egotistical who pride themselves on
+their infallibility, as we have pointed out at length in preceding
+chapters.
+
+The man of real poise will be more than careful not to pose as a
+prophet, still less as an autocrat.
+
+He will study to establish about him an atmosphere of confidence suited
+to the development and the strengthening of the bonds which unite him to
+those of his household.
+
+Nothing is more touching than the blind faith shown by some children
+toward their parents.
+
+People of timidity will never arouse a feeling of this sort.
+
+However real the affection of children may be for such parents, there
+will always be mingled with it a modicum of indulgent pity, caused by
+their distrust, if the parents happen to be people of timidity, of what
+seem to them mediocre abilities.
+
+They will feel themselves more willingly attracted toward a stranger, if
+his attitude toward life appears to be one that may support and assist
+their weakness. Their affection for their parents will be in no way
+diminished, but they will cease to regard them as being vitally
+necessary to the harmony of their existence.
+
+This lack of trust that timidity occasions can result in very serious
+misfortunes.
+
+In driving a child who seeks for some firm guidance to appeal to others
+than his natural protectors, there is always the risk of his following a
+method of education that is basically opposed to all the traditions of
+the family.
+
+How many children are thrown in this way upon the tender mercies of a
+teacher whose views of life, albeit perfectly honorable, are quite
+opposed to the plans of the parents.
+
+Such people, instead of complaining of the conduct of the teacher and
+crying out about the leading astray of their child, would do better to
+question themselves and to ask their own hearts whether their children
+have ever found in them the protection that is being given them by
+others.
+
+We do not want to overwork the old fable of the oak and the ivy.
+Nevertheless, it is to the point to remark that this plant attaches
+itself to none but the most solid trunks, disdaining the Weaker saplings
+that will bend beneath its weight and will, after a little while, force
+it to return to the ground instead of helping it to climb into the air.
+
+The man endowed with poise plays in his own family the role of the oak
+which lends the strength of its trunk as an aid to weakness, covering
+with the shadow of its branches the feeble efforts that too hot a sun or
+too violent a storm might easily bring to nothing.
+
+And if the storm should break it is the crest that it presents with
+pride to the fury of the elements that will keep it from being itself
+destroyed.
+
+It must also be remembered that the instinct of the Ego flourishes in
+every one of us, often quite unconsciously, but always with sufficient
+force to make it certain that this ego will be developed in the
+direction in which it sees chances of support.
+
+We are not speaking here of mere egoism, which is a species of
+acknowledgment of weakness that very young children are incapable of
+making to themselves, but which those who are older will try to avoid.
+
+But there is no one, even among the most strong, who has not felt at
+some time in his life the joy of finding counsel, moral support, or
+protection, if only in the form of a hearty and energetic agreement with
+his ideas.
+
+One can not wonder, therefore, that people of poise are able to draw to
+themselves sympathies and devotion of which the timid are entirely
+ignorant.
+
+We should add that poise, in giving one ease, imparts to the slightest
+gesture a fittingness that constitutes a special grace, that one can not
+always define, but where appearance can never be mistaken.
+
+It might be termed distinction.
+
+People of poise, whether they be homely or handsome, insignificant or
+imposing, sickly or radiating health, all possess this enviable gift in
+a marked degree.
+
+Distinction is the parent of victory.
+
+It conquers, for those who possess it, the greater part of their
+adversaries, who lay down their arms without dreaming of offering
+battle.
+
+Distinction impresses every one, both those who are deprived of it and
+those who are possest of it.
+
+It is the most direct means of influencing others in the direction one
+wishes them to take.
+
+It is hardly necessary for us to restate here that there must be no
+harmful influence in all this, no abuse of power.
+
+Distinction is only efficacious and only possesses its proper force when
+it is the outcome of the qualities we have been endeavoring to inculcate
+in this book.
+
+False distinction, that which is based upon effrontery, is like those
+mirages of the desert whose appearance troubles the traveler.
+
+At first he rejoices at seeing before him a countryside that seems like
+his hoped-for goal, but as he presses forward the picture fades away
+little by little and he perceives that he has been the victim of an
+empty dream. This is invariably what happens when what appears to be
+distinction is founded merely upon bravado and bluff.
+
+The credulous, who are at first deceived by the illusion, very soon
+arrive at the point where they perceive their error, and, with the
+dissipation of the mirage, comes the contempt of the person who has thus
+made them take him seriously. They do not find it an easy matter to
+forgive him for having made dupes of them and their anger increases with
+the hurt to their wounded pride.
+
+Those people, on the other hand, who possess that distinction that comes
+from the qualities inherent in poise, are sure of being able to preserve
+it untarnished, because their influence will never be enfeebled by
+disappointments they may cause in others.
+
+If they are ever conquered for a moment, it is never because of weakness
+or lack of character.
+
+Their defeat can never in any case be considered as decisive. Their
+energy will cause them to face the battle anew, armed by the very
+defeats of the past, and rendered invincible by their cool
+determination.
+
+The mere habit of fighting tempers their souls and makes them strong,
+while the recollection of past reverses makes them more wary and more
+keen to take advantage of the lessons to be learned from events.
+
+Thus they will not be slow in exacting that revenge from fate which will
+renew the confidence of all their friends.
+
+They are a power, and under this title they receive the homage of all.
+Their existence is held to be a vital thing by all those who would stay
+their own weaknesses upon their strength.
+
+Their assistance may not always be effective, but it has the air of
+being so, and those who are afraid of failure are always anxious to have
+near at hand a force upon which they can rely to keep them from defeat.
+
+Every one who has helped to teach a child to walk has noticed that when
+its mother remains beside it and holds it up by the imaginary support of
+her hand, it steps out with confidence.
+
+If she should go several paces ahead, the child, left to itself, and
+overcome by the fear caused by the withdrawal of her protection, which
+he really does not need, hesitates, stumbles, and presently falls down.
+
+Men who are endowed with poise are not only appreciated by the weak of
+spirit, they are also esteemed and valued by those who possess qualities
+similar to their own. Such people are glad to meet a fortitude that
+approximates to theirs.
+
+They are infinitely better fitted than others to escape the pitfalls
+with which the journey of life is strewn. If, in spite of everything,
+misfortune should attack them, they will meet it so bravely and will
+combat it with weapons of such unusual temper that it will hasten to
+beat a retreat in order to knock at the door of some timid soul, who
+will yield to it without a struggle and will allow it to take possession
+of him without a murmur.
+
+
+
+***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK POISE: HOW TO ATTAIN IT***
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