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diff --git a/old/13010-8.txt b/old/13010-8.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..5572b93 --- /dev/null +++ b/old/13010-8.txt @@ -0,0 +1,15292 @@ +The Project Gutenberg eBook, Frank Mildmay, by Captain Frederick +Marryat + + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + + + + +Title: Frank Mildmay + +Author: Captain Frederick Marryat + +Release Date: July 24, 2004 [eBook #13010] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + + +***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK FRANK MILDMAY*** + + +E-text prepared by Ted Garvin, Josephine Paolucci, and the Project +Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team + + + +FRANK MILDMAY + +Or, The Naval Officer + +by + +CAPTAIN MARRYAT + +LONDON + +MDCCCXCV + + + + + + +Contents + + +CHAPTER I +CHAPTER II +CHAPTER III +CHAPTER IV +CHAPTER V +CHAPTER VI +CHAPTER VII +CHAPTER VIII +CHAPTER IX +CHAPTER X +CHAPTER XI +CHAPTER XII +CHAPTER XIII +CHAPTER XIV +CHAPTER XV +CHAPTER XVI +CHAPTER XVII +CHAPTER XVIII +CHAPTER XIX +CHAPTER XX +CHAPTER XXI +CHAPTER XXII +CHAPTER XXIII +CHAPTER XXIV +CHAPTER XXV +CHAPTER XXVI +CHAPTER XXVII +CHAPTER XXVIII +CHAPTER XXIX + + + + +Prefatory Note + + +We do not intend to review our own work; if we did it justice we +might be accused of partiality, and we are not such fools as to abuse +it. We leave that to our literary friends who may have so little taste +as not to appreciate its merits. Not that there would be anything +novel in reviewing our own performances--that we have discovered since +we have assumed the office of editor; but still it is always done _sub +rosa_, whereas in our position we could not deny our situation as +editor and author. Of _Peter Simple_, therefore, we say nothing, but +we take this opportunity of saying a few words to the public.... _The +Naval Officer_ was our first attempt, and its having been our first +attempt must be offered in extenuation of its many imperfections; it +was written hastily, and before it was complete we were appointed to +a ship. We cared much about our ship and little about our book. The +first was diligently taken care of by ourselves, the second was left +in the hands of others to get on how it could. Like most bantlings put +out to nurse, it did not get on very well. As we happen to be in a +communicative vein, it may be as well to remark that, being written in +the autobiographical style, it was asserted by friends, and believed +in general, that it was a history of the author's life. Now, without +pretending to have been better than we should have been in our earlier +days, we do most solemnly assure the public that had we run the career +of vice of the hero of the _Naval Officer_, at all events we should +have had sufficient sense of shame not to have avowed it. Except the +hero and heroine, and those parts of the work which supply the +slight plot of it as a novel, the work in itself is materially true, +especially in the narrative of sea adventure, most of which did (to +the best of our recollection) occur to the author. We say to the best +of our recollection, as it behoves us to be careful. We have not +forgotten the snare in which Chamier found himself by asserting in his +preface that his narrative was fact. In _The Naval Officer_ much good +material was thrown away; but we intend to write it over again some +day of these days, and _The Naval Officer_, when corrected, will be +so improved that he may be permitted to stand on the same shelf with +_Pride and Prejudice_ and _Sense and Sensibility_.[A] + +[Footnote A: The improvement was never made.--ED.] + +"The confounded licking we received for our first attempts in the +critical notices is probably well known to the reader--at all events +we have not forgotten it. Now, with some, this severe castigation of +their first offence would have had the effect of their never offending +again; but we felt that our punishment was rather too severe; it +produced indignation instead of contrition, and we determined to write +again in spite of all the critics in the universe; and in the due +course of nine months we produced _The King's Own_. In _The Naval +Officer_ we had sowed all our wild oats; we had _paid off_ those who +had ill-treated us, and we had no further personality to indulge in. +_The King's Own_, therefore, was wholly fictitious in characters, in +plot, and in events, as have been its successors. _The King's Own_ was +followed by _Newton Forster, Newton Forster_ by _Peter Simple_. These +are _all_ our productions. Reader, we have told our tale." + +This significant document was published by Captain Marryat in the +_Metropolitan Magazine_ 1833, of which he was at that time the editor, +on the first appearance of _Peter Simple_, in order, among other +things, to disclaim the authorship of a work entitled the _Port +Admiral_, which contained "an infamous libel upon one of our most +distinguished officers deceased, and upon the service in general." It +repudiates, without explaining away, certain unpleasant impressions +that even the careful reader of to-day cannot entirely avoid. Marryat +made Frank Mildmay a scamp, I am afraid, in order to prove that +he himself had not stood for the portrait; but he clearly did not +recognise the full enormities of his hero, to which he was partially +blinded by a certain share thereof. The adventures were admittedly his +own, they were easily recognised, and he had no right to complain +of being confounded with the insolent young devil to whom they were +attributed. It would, however, be at once ungracious and unprofitable +to attempt any analysis of the points of difference and resemblance; +any reader will detect the author's failings by his work; other +coincidences may be noticed here. + +It has been said, in the general introduction, that Marryat's cruises +in the _Imperieuse_ are almost literally described in _Frank Mildmay_. +We have also independent accounts of certain personal adventures there +related. + +The episode, chap, iv., of being bitten by a skate--supposed to be +dead--which is used again in _Peter Simple_, came from Marryat's own +experience; and he declared that he ran away from school on account +of the very indignity--that of being compelled to wear his elder +brother's old clothes--which Frank Mildmay pleads as an excuse for +sharing at least the sentiments of Cain. Marryat, again, was trampled +upon and left for dead when boarding an enemy (see chap, v.); he +saved the midshipman who had bullied him, from drowning, though his +reflections on the occasion are more edifying than those recounted in +chap. v. "From that moment," he says, "I have loved the fellow as I +never loved friend before. All my hate is forgotten. I have saved +his life." The defence of the castle of Rosas, chap, vii., is taken +straight from his private log-book; while Marshall's Naval Biography +contains an account of his volunteering during a gale to cut away the +main-yard of the _Aeolus_, which scarcely pales before the vigorous +passage in chap. xiv.:-- + + "On the 30th of September, 1811, in lat. 40° 50' N., long. 65° W. + (off the coast of New England), a gale of wind commenced at S.E., + and soon blew with tremendous fury; the _Aeolus_ was laid on her + beam ends, her top-masts and mizen-masts were literally blown + away, and she continued in this extremely perilous situation for + at least half-an-hour. Directions were given to cut away the + main-yard, in order to save the main-mast and right the ship, but + so great was the danger attending such an operation considered, + that not a man could be induced to attempt it until Mr Marryat led + the way. His courageous conduct on this occasion excited general + admiration, and was highly approved of by Lord James Townsend, one + of whose company he also saved by jumping overboard at sea." + +The edition of 1873 contained a brief memoir of the author, by +"Florence Marryat," frequently reprinted. + +_Frank Mildmay_, originally called _The Naval Officer; or, Scenes and +Adventures in the Life of Frank Mildmay_, is here printed from the +first edition published in 1829 by Henry Colborn, with the following +motto on the title-page:-- + + My muse by no means deals in fiction; + She gathers a repertory of facts, + Of course with some reserve and slight restriction, + But mostly traits of human things and acts. + Love, war, a tempest--surely there's variety; + Also a seasoning slight of lubrication; + A bird's-eye view, too, of that wild society; + A slight glance thrown on men of every station + + _Don Juan_. + +R.B.J. + + + + + +Chapter I + + These are the errors, and these are the fruits of misspending our + prime youth at the schools and universities, as we do, either + in learning mere words, or such things chiefly as were better + unlearned.--MILTON. + + +My father was a gentleman, and a man of considerable property. In my +infancy and childhood I was weak and sickly, but the favourite of my +parents beyond all my brothers and sisters, because they saw that my +mind was far superior to my sickly frame, and feared they should never +raise me to manhood; contrary, however, to their expectations, I +surmounted all these untoward appearances, and attracted much notice +from my liveliness, quickness of repartee, and impudence: qualities +which have been of much use to me through life. + +I can remember that I was both a coward and a boaster; but I have +frequently remarked that the quality which we call cowardice in +a child, is no more than implying a greater sense of danger, and +consequently a superior intellect. We are all naturally cowards: +education and observation teach us to discriminate between real and +apparent danger; pride teaches the concealment of fear, and habit +renders us indifferent to that from which we have often escaped with +impunity. It is related of the Great Frederick that he misbehaved the +first time he went into action; and it is certain that a novice in +such a situation can no more command all his resources than a boy when +first bound apprentice to a shoemaker can make a pair of shoes. We +must learn our trade, whether it be to stand steady before the enemy, +or to stitch a boot; practice alone can make a Hoby or a Wellington. + +I pass on to my school-days, when the most lasting impressions are +made. The foundation of my moral and religious instruction had been +laid with care by my excellent parents; but, alas! from the time I +quitted the paternal roof not one stone was added to the building, and +even the traces of what existed were nearly obliterated by the deluge +of vice which threatened soon to overwhelm me. Sometimes, indeed, I +feebly, but ineffectually endeavoured to stem the torrent; at others, +I suffered myself to be borne along with all its fatal rapidity. I was +frank, generous, quick, and mischievous; and I must admit that a large +portion of what sailors call "devil" was openly displayed, and a much +larger portion latently deposited in my brain and bosom. My ruling +passion, even in this early stage of life, was pride. Lucifer himself, +if he ever was seven years old, had not more. If I have gained a fair +name in the service, if I have led instead of followed, it must be +ascribed to this my ruling passion. The world has often given me +credit for better feelings, as the source of action, but I am not +writing to conceal, and the truth must be told. + +I was sent to school to learn Latin and Greek, which there are various +ways of teaching. Some tutors attempt the _suaviter in modo_, my +schoolmaster preferred the _fortiter in re_; and, as the boatswain +said, by the "instigation" of a large knotted stick, he drove +knowledge into our skulls as a caulker drives oakum into the seams of +a ship. Under such tuition, we made astonishing progress; and whatever +my less desirable acquirements may have been, my father had no cause +to complain of my deficiency in classic lore. Superior in capacity to +most of my schoolfellows, I seldom took the pains to learn my lesson +previous to going up with my class: "the master's blessing," as we +called it, did occasionally descend on my devoted head, but that was +a bagatelle; I was too proud not to keep pace with my equals, and too +idle to do more. + +Had my schoolmaster being a single man, my stay under his care might +have been prolonged to my advantage; but unfortunately, both for +him and for me, he had a helpmate, and her peculiarly unfortunate +disposition was the means of corrupting those morals over which it was +her duty to have watched with the most assiduous care. _Her_ ruling +passions were suspicion and avarice, written in legible characters +in her piercing eyes and sharp-pointed nose. She never supposed +us capable of telling the truth, so we very naturally never gave +ourselves the trouble to cultivate a useless virtue, and seldom +resorted to it unless it answered our purpose better than a lie. This +propensity of Mrs Higginbottom converted our candour and honesty into +deceit and fraud. Never believed, we cared little about the accuracy +of our assertions; half-starved, through her meanness and parsimony, +we were little scrupulous as to the ways and means, provided we could +satisfy our hunger; and thus we soon became as great adepts in the +elegant accomplishments of lying and thieving, under her tuition, as +we did in Greek and Latin under that of her husband. + +A large orchard, fields, garden, and poultry-yard, attached to +the establishment, were under the care and superintendence of the +mistress, who usually selected one of the boys as her prime minister +and confidential adviser. This boy, for whose education his parents +were paying some sixty or eighty pounds per annum, was permitted to +pass his time in gathering up the windfalls; in watching the hens, +and bringing in their eggs, when their cackling throats had announced +their safe accouchement; looking after the broods of young ducks and +chickens, _et hoc genus omne_; in short, doing the duty of what is +usually termed the odd man in the farmyard. How far the parents would +have been satisfied with this arrangement, I leave my readers to +guess; but to us who preferred the manual to mental exertion, +exercise to restraint, and any description of cultivation to that of +cultivating the mind, it suited extremely well; and accordingly no +place in the gift of government was ever the object of such solicitude +and intrigue, as was to us schoolboys the situation of collector and +trustee of the eggs and apples. + +I had the good fortune to be early selected for this important post, +and the misfortune to lose it soon after, owing to the cunning and +envy of my schoolfellows and the suspicion of my employers. On my +first coming into office, I had formed the most sincere resolutions of +honesty and vigilance; but what are good resolutions, when discouraged +on the one hand by the revilings of suspicion, and assailed on the +other by the cravings of appetite? My morning's collection was exacted +from me to the very last nut, and the greedy eyes of my mistress +seemed to inquire for more. Suspected when innocent, I became guilty +out of revenge; was detected and dismissed. A successor was appointed, +to whom I surrendered all my offices of trust, and having perfect +leisure, I made it my sole business to supplant him. + +It was an axiom in mathematics with me at that time, though not found +in Euclid, that wherever I could enter my head, my whole body might +follow. As a practical illustration of this proposition, I applied my +head to the arched hole of the hen-house door, and by scraping away +a little dirt, contrived to gain admittance, and very speedily +transferred all the eggs to my own chest. When the new purveyor +arrived, he found nothing but "a beggarly account of empty boxes;" and +his perambulations in the orchard and garden, for the same reason +were equally _fruitless_. The pilferings of the orchard and garden I +confiscated as droits; but when I had collected a sufficient number of +eggs to furnish a nest, I gave information of my pretended discovery +to my mistress, who, thinking she had not changed for the better, +dismissed my successor, and received me into favour again. I was, +like many greater men, immediately reinstated in office when it was +discovered that they could not do without me. I once more became +chancellor of the hen-roost and ranger of the orchard, with greater +power than I had possessed before my disgrace. Had my mistress looked +half as much in my face as she did into my hatful of eggs, she would +have read my guilt; for at that unsophisticated age I could blush, a +habit long since discarded in the course of my professional duties. + +In order to preserve my credit and my situation, I no longer contented +myself with windfalls, but assisted nature in her labours, and greatly +lightened the burthen of many a loaded fruit-tree; by these means, I +not only gratified the avarice of my mistress at her own expense, but +also laid by a store for my own use. On my restoration to office, I +had an ample fund in my exchequer to answer all present demands; and +by a provident and industrious anticipation, was enabled to lull the +suspicions of my employers, and to bid defiance to the opposition. It +will readily be supposed that a lad of my acuteness did not omit any +technical management for the purpose of disguise; the fruits which I +presented were generally soiled with dirt at the ends of the stalks, +in such a manner as to give them all the appearance of "_felo de se_," +i.e. fell of itself. Thus, in the course of a few months, did I become +an adept of vice, from the mismanagement of those into whose hands I +was intrusted to be strengthened in religion and virtue. + +Fortunately for me, as far as my education was concerned, I did not +long continue to hold this honourable and lucrative employment. One of +those unhappy beings called an usher peeped into my chest, and by way +of acquiring popularity with the mistress and scholars, forthwith +denounced me to the higher powers. The proofs of my peculation were +too glaring, and the amount too serious to be passed over; I was +tried, convicted, condemned, sentenced, flogged, and dismissed in the +course of half-an-hour; and such was the degree of turpitude attached +to me on this occasion, that I was rendered for ever incapable of +serving in that or any other employment connected with the garden or +farm; I was placed at the bottom of the list, and declared to be the +worst boy in the school. + +This in many points of view was too true; but there was one boy who +bade fair to rival me on the score of delinquency; this was Tom +Crauford, who from that day became my most intimate friend. Tom was +a fine spirited fellow, up to everything; loved mischief, though not +vicious; and was ready to support me in everything through thick and +thin; and truly I found him sufficient employment. I threw off all +disguise, laughed at any suggestion of reform, which I considered +as not only useless, but certain of subjecting me to ridicule and +contempt among my associates. I therefore adopted the motto of some +great man "to be rather than seem to be." I led in every danger; +declared war against all drivellers and half-measures; stole +everything that was eatable from garden, orchard, or hen-house, +knowing full well that whether I did so or not, I should be equally +suspected. Thenceforward all fruit missed, all arrows shot into pigs, +all stones thrown into windows, and all mud spattered over clean linen +hung out to dry, were traced to Tom and myself; and with the usual +alacrity of an arbitrary police, the space between apprehension and +punishment was very short--we were constantly brought before the +master, and as regularly dismissed with "his blessing," till we became +hardened to blows and to shame. + +Thus, by the covetousness of this woman, who was the grey mare, and +the folly of the master, who, in anything but Greek and Latin, was an +ass, my good principles were nearly eradicated from my bosom, and in +their place were sown seeds which very shortly produced an abundant +harvest. + +There was a boy at our school lately imported from the East Indies. +We nick-named him Johnny Pagoda. He was remarkable for nothing but +ignorance, impudence, great personal strength, and, as we thought, +determined resolution. He was about nineteen years of age. One day he +incurred the displeasure of the master, who, enraged at his want of +comprehension and attention, struck him over the head with a knotted +cane. This appeal, although made to the least sensitive part of his +frame, roused the indolent Asiatic from his usual torpid state. The +weapon, in the twinkling of an eye, was snatched out of the hand, and +suspended over the head of the astonished pedagogue, who, seeing the +tables so suddenly turned against him, made the signal for assistance. +I clapped my hands, shouted "Bravo! lay on, Johnny--go it--you have +done it now--you may as well be hanged for a sheep as a lamb;" but +the ushers began to muster round, the boy hung aloof, and Pagoda, +uncertain which side the neutrals would take, laid down his arms, and +surrendered at discretion. + +Had the East-Indian followed up his act by the application of a little +discipline at the fountain-head, it is more than probable that a +popular commotion, not unlike that of Mas' Aniello would have ensued; +but the time was not come: the Indian showed a white feather, was +laughed at, flogged, and sent home to his friends, who had intended +him for the bar; but foreseeing that he might, in the course of +events, chance to cut a figure on the wrong side of it, sent him to +sea, where his valour, if he had any, would find more profitable +employment. + +This unsuccessful attempt of the young Oriental, was the primary cause +of all my fame and celebrity in after-life. I had always hated +school; and this, of all others, seemed to me the most hateful. The +emancipation of Johnny Pagoda convinced me that my deliverance might +be effected in a similar manner. The train was laid, and a spark set +it on fire. This spark was supplied by the folly and vanity of a fat +French dancing-master. These Frenchmen are ever at the bottom of +mischief. Mrs Higginbottom, the master's wife, had denounced me to +Monsieur Aristide Maugrebleu as a _mauvais sujet_; and as he was a +creature of hers, he frequently annoyed me to gratify his patroness. +This fellow was at that time about forty-five years of age, and had +much more experience than agility, having greatly increased his bulk +by the roast beef and ale of England. While he taught us the rigadoons +of his own country, his vanity induced him to attempt feats much above +the cumbrous weight of his frame. I entered the lists with him, beat +him at his own trade, and he beat me with his fiddle-stick, which +broke in two over my head; then, making one more glorious effort to +show that he would not be outdone, snapped the tendon Achilles, and +down he fell, _hors de combat_ as a dancing-master. He was taken away +in his gig to be cured, and I was taken into the school-room to be +flogged. + +This I thought so unjust that I ran away. Tom Crauford helped me to +scale the wall; and when he supposed I had got far enough to be out of +danger from pursuit, went and gave information, to avoid the suspicion +of having aided and abetted. After running a mile, to use a sea +phrase, I hove to, and began to compose, in my mind, an oration which +I intended to pronounce before my father, by way of apology for +my sudden and unexpected appearance; but I was interrupted by the +detested usher and half a dozen of the senior boys, among whom was +Tom Crauford. Coming behind me as I sat on a stile, they cut short my +meditations by a tap on the shoulder, collared and marched me to the +right about in double quick time. Tom Crauford was one of those +who held me, and outdid himself in zealous invective at my base +ingratitude in absconding from the best of masters, and the most +affectionate, tender, and motherly of all school-dames. + +The usher swallowed all this, and I soon made him swallow a great deal +more. We passed near the side of a pond, the shoals and depths of +which were well known to me. I looked at Tom out of the corner of my +eye, and motioned him to let me go; and, like a mackerel out of a +fisherman's hand, I darted into the water, got up to my middle, and +then very coolly, for it was November, turned round to gaze at my +escort, who stood at bay, and looked very much like fools. The usher, +like a low bred cur, when he could no longer bully, began to fawn; +he entreated and he implored me to think on "my papa and mamma; how +miserable they would be, if they could but see me; what an increase of +punishment I was bringing on myself by such obstinacy." He held out +by turns coaxes and threats; in short, everything but an amnesty, to +which I considered myself entitled, having been driven to rebellion by +the most cruel persecution. + +Argument having failed, and there being no volunteers to come in +and fetch me out of the water, the poor usher, much against his +inclination, was compelled to undertake it. With shoes and stockings +off, and trousers tucked up, he ventured one foot into the water, then +the other; a cold shiver reached his teeth, and made them chatter; +but, at length, with cautious tread he advanced towards me. Being once +in the water, a step or two farther was no object to me, particularly +as I knew I could but be well flogged after all, and I was quite +sure of that, at all events, so I determined to have my revenge and +amusement. Stepping back, he followed, and suddenly fell over head and +ears into a hole, as he made a reach at me. I was already out of +my depth, and could swim like a duck, and as soon as he came up, I +perched my knees on his shoulders and my hands on his head, and sent +him souse under a second time, keeping him there until he had drunk +more water than any horse that ever came to the pond. I then allowed +him to wallow out the best way he could; and as it was very cold, I +listened to the entreaties of Tom and the boys who stood by, cracking +their sides with laughter at the poor usher's helpless misery. + +Having had my frolic, I came out, and voluntarily surrendered myself +to my enemies, from whom I received the same mercy, in proportion, +that a Russian does from a Turk. Dripping wet, cold, and covered with +mud, I was first shown to the boys as an aggregate of all that was bad +in nature; a lecture was read to them on the enormity of my offence, +and solemn denunciations of my future destiny closed the discourse. +The shivering fit produced by the cold bath was relieved by as sound +a flogging as could be inflicted, while two ushers held me; but no +effort of theirs could elicit one groan or sob from me, my teeth were +clenched in firm determination of revenge: with this passion my bosom +glowed, and my brain was on fire. The punishment, though dreadfully +severe, had one good effect--it restored my almost suspended +animation; and I strongly recommend the same remedy being applied to +all young ladies and gentlemen who, from disappointed love or other +such trifling causes, throw themselves into the water. Had the +miserable usher been treated after this prescription, he might have +escaped a cold and rheumatic fever which had nearly consigned him to +a country churchyard, in all probability to reappear at the +dissecting-room of St Bartholomew's Hospital. + +About this time Johnny Pagoda, who had been two years at sea, came +to the school to visit his brother and schoolfellows. I pumped this +fellow to tell me all he knew: he never tried to deceive me, or to +make a convert. He had seen enough of a midshipman's life, to know +that a cockpit was not paradise; but he gave me clear and ready +answers to all my questions. I discovered that there was no +schoolmaster in the ship, and that the midshipmen were allowed a +pint of wine a day. A man-of-war, and the gallows, they say, +refuse nothing; and as I had some strong presentiment from recent +occurrences, that if I did not volunteer for the one, I should, in all +probability, be pressed for the other, I chose the lesser evil of the +two; and having made up my mind to enter the glorious profession, I +shortly after communicated my intention to my parents. + +From the moment I had come to this determination, I cared not what +crime I committed, in hopes of being expelled from the school. I wrote +scurrilous letters, headed a mutiny, entered into a league with the +other boys to sink, burn and destroy, and do all the mischief we +could. Tom Crauford had the master's child to dry nurse: he was only +two years old: Tom let him fall, not intentionally, but the poor child +was a cripple in consequence of it for life. This was an accident +which under any other circumstances we should have deplored, but to us +it was almost a joke. + +The cruel treatment I had received from these people, had so +demoralized me, that those passions,--which under more skilful or +kinder treatment, had either not been known, or would have lain +dormant, were roused into full and malignant activity: I went to +school a good-hearted boy, I left it a savage. The accident with the +child occurred two days before the commencement of the vacation, and +we were all dismissed on the following day in consequence. On my +return home I stated verbally to my father and mother, as I had done +before by letter, that I was resolved to go to sea. My mother wept, my +father expostulated. I gazed with apathy on the one, and listened +with cold indifference to the reasoning and arguments of the other; +a choice of schools was offered to me, where I might be a parlour +boarder, and I was to finish at the University, if I would but give up +my fatal infatuation. Nothing, however, would do; the die was cast, +and for the sea I was to prepare. + +What fool was it who said that the happiest times of our lives is +passed at school? There may, indeed, be exceptions, but the remark +cannot be generalized. Stormy as has been my life, the most miserable +part of it (with very little exception) was passed at school; and my +mind never received so much injury from any scenes of vice and excess +in after-life, as it did from the shameful treatment and bad example +I met with there. If my bosom burned with fiend-like passions, whose +fault was it? How had the sacred pledge, given by the master, been +redeemed? Was I not sacrificed to the most sordid avarice, in the +first instance, and almost flayed alive in the second, to gratify +revenge? Of the filthy manner in which our food was prepared, I can +only say that the bare recollection of it excites nausea; and to this +hour, bread and milk, suet pudding, and shoulders of mutton, are +objects of my deep-rooted aversion. The conduct of the ushers, who +were either tyrannical extortioners, or partakers in our crimes--the +constant loss of our clothes by the dishonesty or carelessness of the +servants--the purloining our silver spoons, sheets, and towels, when +we went away, upon the plea of "custom"--the charges in the account +for windows which I had never broken, and books which I had never +received--the shameful difference between the annual cost promised by +the master, and the sum actually charged, ought to have opened the +eyes of my father. + +I am aware how excellent many of these institutions are, and that +there are few so bad as the one I was sent to. The history of my life +will prove of what vital importance it is to ascertain the character +of the master and mistress as to other points besides teaching Greek +and Latin, before a child is intrusted to their care. I ought to +have observed, that during my stay at this school, I had made some +proficiency in mathematics and algebra. + +My father had procured for me a berth on board a fine frigate at +Plymouth, and the interval between my nomination and joining was spent +by my parents in giving advice to me, and directions to the several +tradesmen respecting my equipment. The large chest, the sword, the +cocked-hat, the half-boots, were all ordered in succession; and the +arrival of each article either of use or ornament was anticipated by +me with a degree of impatience which can only be compared to that of +a ship's company arrived off Dennose from a three years' station in +India, and who hope to be at anchor at Spithead before sunset. The +circumstance of my going to sea affected my father in no other way +than it interfered with his domestic comforts by the immoderate grief +of my poor mother. In any other point of view my choice of profession +was a source of no regret to him. I had an elder brother, who was +intended to have the family estates, and who was then at Oxford, +receiving an education suitable to his rank in life, and also learning +how to spend his money like a gentleman. Younger brothers are, in such +cases, just as well out of the way, particularly one of my turbulent +disposition: a man-of-war, therefore, like _another piece of timber_, +has its uses. My father paid all the bills with great philosophy, and +made me a liberal allowance for my age. + +The hour of departure drew near; my chest had been sent off by the +Plymouth waggon, and a hackney-coach drew up to the door, to convey +me to the White Horse Cellar. The letting down of the rattling steps +completely overthrew the small remains of fortitude which my dearest +mother had reserved for our separation, and she threw her arms around +my neck in a frenzy of grief. I beheld her emotions with a countenance +as unmoved as the figure-head of a ship; while she covered my stoic +face with kisses, and washed it with her tears. I almost wondered what +it all meant, and wished the scene was over. + +My father helped me out of this dilemma; taking me firmly by the arm, +he led me out of the room: my mother sank upon the sofa, and hid her +face in her pocket-handkerchief. I walked as slowly to the coach as +common decency would permit. My father looked at me, as if he would +inquire of my very inward soul whether I really did possess human +feelings? I felt the meaning of this, even in my then tender years; +and such was my sense of propriety, that I mustered up a tear for each +eye, which, I hope, answered the intended purpose. We say at sea, +"When you have no decency, sham a little;" and I verily believe I +should have beheld my poor mother in her coffin with less regret than +I could have foregone the gay and lovely scenes which I anticipated. + +How amply has this want of feeling towards a tender parent been +recalled to my mind, and severely punished, in the events of my +vagrant life! + + + + +Chapter II + + Injuries may be atoned for and forgiven; but insults admit of no + compensation. They degrade the mind in its own esteem, and force + it to recover its level by revenge.--JUNIUS. + + +There are certain events in our lives poetically and beautifully +described by Moore, as "green spots in memory's waste." Such are the +emotions arising from the attainment, after a long pursuit, of any +darling object of love or ambition; and although possession and +subsequent events may have proved to us that we had overrated our +enjoyment, and experience have shown us "that all is vanity," still, +recollection dwells with pleasure upon the beating heart, when the +present only was enjoyed, and the picture painted by youthful and +sanguine anticipation in glowing and delightful colours. Youth only +can feel this; age has been often deceived--too often has the fruit +turned to ashes in the mouth. The old look forward with a distrust and +doubt, and backward with sorrow and regret. + +One of the red-letter days of my life, was that on which I first +mounted the uniform of a midshipman. My pride and ecstacy were beyond +description. I had discarded the school and school-boy dress, and, +with them, my almost stagnant existence. Like the chrysalis changed +into a butterfly, I fluttered about as if to try my powers; and felt +myself a gay and beautiful creature, free to range over the wide +domains of nature, clear of the trammels of parents or schoolmasters; +and my heart bounded within me at the thoughts of being left to enjoy +at my own discretion, the very acmé of all the pleasure that human +existence could afford; and I observe that in this, as in most other +cases, I met with that disappointment which usually attends us. True +it is, that in the days of my youth, I did enjoy myself. I was happy +for a time, if happiness it could be called; but dearly have I +paid for it. I contracted a debt, which I have been liquidating by +instalments ever since; nor am I yet emancipated. Even the small +portion of felicity that fell to my lot on this memorable morning was +brief in duration, and speedily followed by chagrin. + +But to return to my uniform. I had arrayed myself in it; my dirk was +belted round my waist; a cocked-hat, of an enormous size, stuck on my +head; and, being perfectly satisfied with my own appearance, at the +last survey which I had made in the glass, I first rang for the +chambermaid, under pretence of telling her to make my room tidy, but, +in reality, that she might admire and compliment me, which she very +wisely did; and I was fool enough to give her half a crown and a kiss, +for I felt myself quite a man. The waiter, to whom the chambermaid had +in all probability communicated the circumstance, presented himself, +and having made a low bow, offered the same compliments, and received +the same reward, save the kiss. Boots would, in all probability, have +come in for his share, had he been in the way, for I was fool enough +to receive all their fine speeches as if they were my due, and to pay +for them at the same time in ready money. I was a gudgeon and they +were sharks; and more sharks would soon have been about me, for I +heard them, as they left the room, call "boots" and "ostler," of +course to assist in lightening my purse. + +But I was too impatient to wait on my captain and see my ship--so I +bounced down the stairs, and in the twinkling of an eye, was on my +way to Stonehouse, where my vanity received another tribute, by a raw +recruit of marine raising his hand to his head, as he passed by me. I +took it as it was meant, raised my hat off my head, and shuffled +by with much self-importance. One consideration, I own, mortified +me--this was that the _natives_ did not appear to admire me half so +much as I admired myself. It never occurred to me then, that middies +were as plentiful at Plymouth Dock, as black boys at Port Royal, +though, perhaps, not of so much value to their masters. I will not +shock the delicacy of my fair readers by repeating all the vulgar +alliterations with which my noviciate was greeted, as I passed in +review before the ladies of North Corner, who met me in Fore Street. +Unsophisticated as I then was, in many points, and certainly in this, +I thought them extremely ill-bred. Fortunately for me, the prayers of +a certain description of people never prevail, otherwise I should have +been immediately consigned to a place, from which, I fear, all the +masses of France and Italy would not have extricated me. + +I escaped from these syrens without being bound to the mast, like +Ulysses; but, like him, I had nearly fallen a victim to a modern +Polyphemus; for though he had not one eye in the middle of his +forehead, after the manner of his prototype, yet the rays from both +his eyes meeting together at the tip of his long nose, gave him very +much that appearance. Ignorance, sheer ignorance, in this, as in many +other cases, was the cause of my disaster. A party of officers, in +full uniform, were coming from a court-martial. "Oh ho!" said I, "here +come some of us." I seized my dirk in my left hand, as I saw they held +their swords, and I stuck my right hand into my bosom as some of them +had done. I tried to imitate their erect and officer-like bearing; +I put my cocked-hat on fore and aft, with the gold rosette dangling +between my two eyes, so that in looking at it, which I could not help +doing, I must have squinted. And I held my nose high in the air, like +a pig in a hurricane, fancying myself as much an object of admiration +to them as I was to myself. We passed on opposite tacks, and our +respective velocities had separated us to the distance of twenty or +thirty yards, when one of them called out to me in a voice evidently +cracked in His Majesty's service--"Hollo, young gentleman, come back +here." + +I concluded I was going to be complimented on the cut of my coat, to +be asked the address of my tailor, and to hear the rakish sit of my +hat admired. I now began to think I should hear a contention between +the lords of the ocean, as to who should have me as a sample middy on +their quarter-decks; and I was even framing an excuse to my father's +friend for not joining his ship. Judge then of my surprise and +mortification, when I was thus accosted in an angry and menacing tone +by the oldest of the officers-- + +"Pray, sir, what ship do you belong to?" + +"Sir," said I, proud to be thus interrogated, "I belong to His +Majesty's ship, the _Le----_" (having a French name, I clapped on both +the French and English articles, as being more impressive). + +"Oh, you do, do you?" said the veteran with an air of conscious +superiority; "then you will be so good as to turn round, go down to +Mutton Cove, take a boat, and have your person conveyed with all +possible speed on board of His Majesty's ship the _Lee_" (imitating +me); "and tell the first lieutenant it is my order that you be not +allowed any more leave while the ship is in port; and I shall tell +your captain he must teach his officers better manners than to pass +the port-admiral without touching their hats." + +While this harangue was going on, I stood in a circle, of which I was +the centre, and the admiral and the captains formed the circumference; +what little air there was their bodies intercepted, so that I was not +only in a stew, but stupefied into the bargain. + +"There, sir, you hear me--you may go." + +"Yes, I do hear you," thinks I; "but how the devil am I to get away +from you?" for the cruel captains, like school-boys round a rat-trap, +stood so close that I could not start. Fortunately, this my blockade, +which they no doubt intended for their amusement, saved me for that +time. I recollected myself, and said, with affected simplicity of +manner, that I had that morning put on my uniform for the first time; +that I had never seen my captain, and never was on board a ship in all +my life. At this explanation, the countenance of the admiral relaxed +into something that was meant for a smile, and the captains all burst +into a loud laugh. + +"Well, young man," said the admiral--who was really a good-tempered +fellow, though an odd one--"well, young man, since you have never been +at sea, it is some excuse for not knowing good manners; there is no +necessity now for delivering my message to the first lieutenant, but +you may go on board your ship." + +Having seen me well-roasted, the captains opened right and left, and +let me pass. As I left them I heard one say, "Just caught--marks of +the dogs' teeth in his heels, I warrant you." I did not stop to make +any reply, but sneaked away, mortified and crest-fallen, and certainly +obeyed this the first order which I had ever received in the service, +with more exactness than I ever did any subsequent one. + +During the remainder of my walk, I touched my hat to every one I met. +I conferred the honour of a salute on midshipmen, master's mates, +sergeants of marines, and two corporals. Nor was I aware of my over +complaisance, until a young woman, dressed like a lady, who knew more +of the navy than I did, asked me if I had come down to stand for the +borough? Without knowing what she meant, I replied, "No." + +"I thought you might," said she, "seeing you are so d----d civil to +everybody." + +Had it not been for this friendly hint, I really believe I should have +touched my hat to a drummer. + +Having gone through this ordeal, I reached the inn at Plymouth, where +I found my captain, and presented my father's letter. He surveyed me +from top to toe, and desired the pleasure of my company to dinner at +six o'clock. "In the mean time," he said, "as it is now only eleven, +you may go aboard, and show yourself to Mr Handstone, the first +lieutenant, who will cause your name to be entered on the books, and +allow you to come back here to dine." I bowed and retired. And on my +way to Mutton Cove was saluted by the females, with the appellation +of Royal Reefer (midshipman), and a Biscuit Nibbler; but all this I +neither understood nor cared for. I arrived safely at Mutton Cove, +where two women, seeing my inquiring eye and span-new dress, asked +what ship they should take "my honour" to, I told them the ship I +wished to go on board of. + +"She _lays_ under the _Obelisk_," said the elder woman, who appeared +to be about forty years of age; "and we will take your honour off for +a shilling." + +I agreed to this, both for the novelty of the thing, as well as on +account of my natural gallantry and love of female society. The elder +woman was mistress of her profession, handling her scull (oar) with +great dexterity; but Sally, the younger one, who was her daughter, was +still in her noviciate. She was pretty, cleanly dressed, had on white +stockings, and sported a neat foot and ankle. + +"Take care, Sally," said the mother; "keep stroke, or you will catch a +crab." + +"Never fear, mother," said the confident Sally; and at the same +moment, as if the very caution against the accident was the cause of +it, the blade of her scull did not dip into the water. The oar meeting +no resistance, its loom, or handle, came back upon the bosom of the +unfortunate Sally, tipped her backwards--up went her heels in the air, +and down fell her head into the bottom of the boat. As she was pulling +the stroke oar, her feet almost came in contact with the rosette of my +cocked hat. + +"There now, Sally," said the wary mother; "I told you how it would +be--I knew you would catch a crab!" + +Sally quickly recovered herself, blushed a little, and resumed her +occupation. + +"That's what we calls catching a crab in our country," said the woman. +I replied that I thought it was a very pretty amusement; and I asked +Sally to try and catch another; but she declined; and, by this time, +we had reached the side of the ship. + +Having paid my naiads, I took hold of the man-rope, as I was +instructed by them, and mounted the side. Reaching the gangway, I was +accosted by a midshipman in a round jacket and trousers, a shirt none +of the cleanest, and a black silk handkerchief tied loosely round his +neck. + +"Who did you want, sir?" said he. + +"I wish to speak with Mr Handstone, the first lieutenant," said I. He +informed me that the first lieutenant was then gone down to frank the +letters, and, when he came on deck, he would acquaint him with my +being there. + +After this dialogue, I was left on the larboard side of the +quarter-deck to my own meditations. The ship was at this time +refitting, and was what is usually called in the hands of the +dockyard, and a sweet mess she was in. The quarter-deck carronades +were run fore and aft; the slides unbolted from the side, the decks +were covered with pitch fresh poured into the seams, and the caulkers +were sitting on their boxes, ready to renew their noisy labours as +soon as the dinner-hour had expired. The middies, meanwhile, on the +starboard side of the quarter-deck, were taking my altitude, and +speculating as to whether I was to be a messmate of theirs, and what +sort of a chap I might chance to be--both these points were solved +very speedily. + +The first lieutenant came on deck; the midshipman of the watch +presented me, and I presented my name and the captain's message. + +"It is all right, sir," said Mr Handstone. "Here, Mr Flyblock, do you +take this young gentleman into your mess; you may show him below as +soon as you please, and tell him where to hang his hammock up." + +I followed my new friend down the ladder, under the half deck, where +sat a woman, selling bread and butter and red herrings to the sailors; +she had also cherries and clotted cream, and a cask of strong beer, +which seemed to be in great demand. We passed her, and descended +another ladder, which brought us to the 'tween-decks, and into the +steerage, in the forepart of which, on the larboard side, abreast of +the mainmast, was my future residence--a small hole, which they called +a berth; it was ten feet long by six, and about five feet four inches +high; a small aperture, about nine inches square, admitted a very +scanty portion of that which we most needed, namely, fresh air and +daylight. A deal table occupied a very considerable extent of this +small apartment, and on it stood a brass candle-stick, with a dip +candle, and a wick like a fullblown carnation. The table-cloth was +spread, and the stains of port wine and gravy too visibly indicated, +like the midshipman's dirty shirt, the near approach of Sunday. The +black servant was preparing for dinner, and I was shown the seat I was +to occupy. "Good Heaven!" thought I, as I squeezed myself between +the ship's side and the mess-table; "and is this to be my future +residence?--better go back to school; there, at least, there is fresh +air and clean linen." + +I would have written that moment to my dear, broken-hearted mother, to +tell her how gladly her prodigal son would fly back to her arms; but +I was prevented doing this, first by pride, and secondly by want +of writing materials. Taking my place, therefore, at the table, I +mustered up all my philosophy; and, to amuse myself, called to mind +the reflections of Gil Blas, when he found himself in the den of the +robbers, "Behold, then, the worthy nephew of my uncle, Gil Perez, +caught like a rat in a trap." + +Most of my new associates were absent on duty; the 'tween-decks was +crammed with casks and cases, and chests, and bags, and hammocks; the +noise of the caulkers was resumed over my head and all around me; +the stench of bilge-water, combining with the smoke of tobacco, the +effluvia of gin and beer, the frying of beef-steaks and onions, and +red herrings--the pressure of a dark atmosphere and a heavy shower +of rain, all conspired to oppress my spirits, and render me the +most miserable dog that ever lived. I had almost resigned myself to +despair, when I recollected the captain's invitation, and mentioned +it to Flyblock. "That's well thought of," said he; "Murphy also dines +with him; you can both go together, and I dare say he will be very +glad of your company." + +A captain seldom waits for a midshipman, and we took good care he +should not wait for us. The dinner was in all respects one "on +service." The captain said a great deal, the lieutenants very little, +and the midshipmen nothing at all; but the performance of the knife +and fork, and wine-glass (as far as it could be got at), were exactly +in the inverse ratio. The company consisted of my own captain, and two +others, our first lieutenant, Murphy, and myself. + +As soon as the cloth was removed, the captain filled me out a glass of +wine, desired I would drink it, and then go and see how the wind was. +I took this my first admonitory hint in its literal sense and meaning; +but having a very imperfect idea of the points of the compass, I own I +felt a little puzzled how I should obtain the necessary information. +Fortunately for me, there was a weathercock on the old church-steeple; +it had four letters, which I certainly did know were meant to +represent the cardinal points. One of these seemed so exactly to +correspond with the dial above it, that I made up my mind the wind +must be West, and instantly returned to give my captain the desired +information, not a little proud with my success in having obtained it +so soon. But what was my surprise to find that I was not thanked for +my trouble; the company even smiled and winked at each other; the +first lieutenant nodded his head and said, "Rather green yet." The +captain, however, settled the point according to the manners and +customs, in such cases, used at sea. "Here, youngster," said he, "here +is another glass for you; drink that, and then Murphy will show you +what I mean." Murphy was my chaperon; he swallowed his wine--rather _à +gorge déployée_; put down his glass very energetically, and, bowing, +left the room. + +When we had got fairly into the hall, we had the following +duet:--"What the h---- brought you back again, you d----d young +greenhorn? Could not you take a hint, and be off, as the captain +intended? So I must lose my wine for such a d----d young whelp as you. +I'll pay you off for this, my tight fellow, before we have been many +weeks together." + +I listened to this elegant harangue, with some impatience, and much +more indignation. "I came back," said I, "to tell the captain how the +wind was." + +"You be d----d," replied Murphy: "do you think the captain did not +know how the wind was? and if he had wanted to know, don't you think +he would have sent a sailor like me, instead of such a d----d lubberly +whelp as you?" + +"As to what the captain meant," said I, "I do not know. I did as I was +bid--but what do you mean by calling me a whelp? I am no more a whelp +than yourself!" + +"Oh, you are not, a'n't you?" said Murphy, seizing me by one of my +ears, which he pulled so unmercifully that he altered the shape of it +very considerably, making it something like the leeboard of a Dutch +schuyt. + +This was not to be borne; though, as I was but thirteen, he seventeen, +and a very stout fellow, I should rather not have sought an action +with him. But he had begun it: my honour was at stake, and I only +wonder I had not drawn my dirk, and laid him dead at my feet. +Fortunately for him, the rage I was in, made me forget I had it by my +side: though I remembered my uniform, the disgrace brought upon it, +and the admiration of the chambermaid, as well as the salute of the +sentinel, all which formed a combustible in my brain. I went off like +a flash, and darted my fist (the weapon I had been most accustomed to +wield) into the left eye of my adversary, with a force and precision +which Crib would have applauded. Murphy staggered back with the blow, +and for a moment I flattered myself he had had enough of it. + +But no--alas, this was a day of disappointments! he had only retreated +to take a spring; he then came on me like the lifeguards at Waterloo, +and his charge was irresistible. I was upset, pummelled, thumped, +kicked, and should probably have been the subject of a coroner's +inquest had not the waiter and chambermaid run in to my rescue. The +tongue of the latter was particularly active in my favour: unluckily +for me, she had no other weapon near her, or it would have gone hard +with Murphy. "Shame!" said she, "for such a great lubberly creature to +beat such a poor, little, innocent, defenceless fellow as that. What +would his mamma say to see him treated so?" + +"D----n his mamma, and you too," said Pat, "look at my eye." + +"D----n your eye," said the waiter: "it's a pity he had not served the +other one the same way; no more than you deserve for striking a child; +the boy is game, and that's more than you are; he is worth as many of +you, as will stand between this and the iron chair at Barbican." + +"I'd like to see him duck'd in it," said the maid. + +While this was going on, I had resumed my defensive attitude. I +had never once complained, and had gained the good-will of all the +bystanders, among whom now appeared my captain and his friends. The +blood was streaming from my mouth, and I bore the marks of discipline +from the superior prowess of my enemy, who was a noted pugilist for +his age, and would not have received the hit from me, if he had +supposed my presumption would have led me to attack him. The captain +demanded an explanation. Murphy told the story in his own way, and +gave anything but the true version. I could have beaten him at that, +but truth answered my purpose better than falsehood on this occasion; +so, as soon as he had done, I gave my round unvarnished tale, and, +although defeated in the field, I plainly saw that I had the advantage +of him in the cabinet. Murphy was dismissed in disgrace, and ordered +to rusticate on board till his eye was bright. + +"I should have confined you to the ship myself," said the captain, +"but the boy has done it for me; you cannot appear on shore with that +black eye." + +As soon as he was gone, I was admonished to be more careful in future. +"You are," said the captain, "like a young bear; all your sorrows are +before you; if you give a blow for every hard name you receive, your +fate in the service may be foreseen: if weak you will be pounded to a +mummy--if strong, you will be hated. A quarrelsome disposition will +make you enemies in every rank you may attain; you will be watched +with a jealous eye, well knowing, as we all do, that the same spirit +of insolence and overbearing which you show in the cockpit, will +follow you to the quarter-deck, and rise with you in the service. This +advice is for your own good; not that I interfere in these things, as +everybody and everything finds its level in a man-of-war; I only wish +you to draw a line between resistance against oppression, which I +admire and respect, and a litigious, uncompromising disposition, which +I despise. Now wash your face and go on board. Try by all means to +conciliate the rest of your messmates, for first impressions are +everything, and rely on it, Murphy's report will not be in your +favour." + +This advice was very good, but had the disadvantage of coming too late +for that occasion by at least half an hour. The fracas was owing to +the captain's mismanagement, and the manners and customs of the navy +at the beginning of the nineteenth century. The conversation at the +tables of the higher ranks of the service in those days, unless ladies +were present, was generally such as a boy could not listen to without +injury to his better feelings. I was therefore "hinted off;" but with +due respect to my captain, who is still living, I should have been +sent on board of my ship and cautioned against the bad habits of the +natives of North Corner and Barbican; and if I could not be admitted +to the mysterious conversation of a captain's table, I should have +been told in a clear and decided manner to depart, without the +needless puzzle of an innuendo, which I did not and could not +understand. + +I returned on board about eight o'clock, where Murphy had gone before +me, and prepared a reception far from agreeable. Instead of being +welcomed to my berth, I was received with coldness, and I returned to +the quarter-deck, where I walked till I was weary, and then leaned +against a gun. From this temporary alleviation, I was roused by a +voice of thunder, "Lean off that gun." I started up, touched my hat, +and continued my solitary walk, looking now and then at the second +lieutenant, who had thus gruffly addressed me. I felt a dejection of +spirits, a sense of destitution and misery, which I cannot describe. I +had done no wrong, yet I was suffering as if I had committed a crime. +I had been aggrieved, and had vindicated myself as well as I could. I +thought I was among devils, and not men; my thoughts turned homeward. +I remembered my poor mother in her agony of grief, on the sofa; and my +unfeeling heart then found that it needed the soothings of affection. +I could have wept, but I knew not where to go; for I could not be seen +to cry on board of ship. My pride began to be humbled. I felt the +misery of dependence, although not wanting pecuniary resources; and +would have given up all my prospects to have been once more seated +quietly at home. + +The first lieutenant came on board soon after, and I heard him +relating my adventure to the second lieutenant. The tide now evidently +turned in my favour. I was invited down to the gun-room, and having +given satisfactory answers to all the questions put to me, Flyblock +was sent for, and I was once more placed under his protection. The +patronage of the first lieutenant, I flattered myself would have +ensured me at least common civility for a short time. + +I had now more leisure to contemplate my new residence and new +associates, who, having returned from the duty of the dock-yard, were +all assembled in the berth, seated round the table on the lockers, +which paid "the double debt" of seats and receptacles; but in order to +obtain a sitting, it was requisite either to climb over the backs of +the company, or submit to "high pressure" from the last comer. Such +close contact, even with our best friends, is never desirable; but in +warm weather, in a close, confined air, with a manifest scarcity of +clean linen, it became particularly inconvenient. The population here +very far exceeded the limits usually allotted to human beings in any +situation of life, except in a slave ship. The midshipmen, of whom +there were eight full-grown, and four youngsters, were without either +jackets or waistcoats; some of them had their shirt-sleeves rolled up, +either to prevent the reception or to conceal the absorption of dirt +in the region of the wristbands. The repast on the table consisted of +a can or large black-jack of small beer, and a japan bread-basket full +of sea-biscuit. To compensate for this simple fare, and at the same +time to cool the close atmosphere of the berth, the table was covered +with a large green cloth with a yellow border, and many yellow spots +withal, where the colour had been discharged by slops of vinegar, hot +tea, &c, &c.; a sack of potatoes stood in one corner, and the shelves +all round, and close over our heads, were stuffed with plates, +glasses, quadrants, knives and forks, loaves of sugar, dirty stockings +and shirts, and still fouler table-cloths, small tooth-combs, and +ditto large, clothes brushes and shoe brushes, cocked-hats, dirks, +German flutes, mahogany writing-desks, a plate of salt butter, and +some two or three pairs of naval half-boots. A single candle served to +make darkness visible, and the stench had nearly overpowered me. + +The reception I met with tended in no way to relieve these horrible +impressions. A black man, with no other dress than a dirty check shirt +and trousers, not smelling of amber, stood within the door, ready to +obey all and any one of the commands with which he was loaded. The +smell of the towel he held in his hand, to wipe the plates and glasses +with, completed my discomfiture; and I fell sick upon the seat nearest +at me. Recovering from this, without the aid of any "ministering +angel," I contracted the pupils of my eyes, and ventured to look +around me. The first who met my gaze, was my recent foe; he bore the +marks of contention by having his eye bound up with brown paper and a +dirty silk pocket-handkerchief; the other was quickly turned on me; +and, with a savage and brutal countenance, he swore and denounced the +severest vengeance on me for what I had done. In this, he was joined +by another ill-looking fellow, with large whiskers. + +I shall not repeat the elegant philippics with which I was greeted. +Suffice it to say that I found all the big ones against me, and the +little ones neuter; the caterer supposing I had received suitable +admonition for my future guidance, and that I was completely bound +over to keep the peace--turned all the youngsters out of the berth. +"As for you, Mr Fistycuff," said he, addressing himself to me, "you +may walk off with the rest of the gang, so make yourself scarce, like +the Highlander's breeches." + +The boys all obeyed the command in silence, and I was not sorry to +follow them. As I went out he added, "So, Mr Rumbusticus, you can obey +orders, I see, and it is well for you; for I had a biscuit ready to +shy at your head." This affront, after all I had suffered, I was +forced to pocket; but I could not understand what the admiral could +mean, when he said that people went to sea "to learn manners." + +I soon made acquaintance with the younger set of my messmates, and we +retreated to the forecastle as the only part of the ship suitable to +the nature of the conversation we intended to hold. After one hour's +deliberation, and notwithstanding it was the first night I had ever +been on board a ship, I was unanimously elected leader of this little +band. I became the William Tell of the party, as having been the first +to resist the tyranny of the oldsters, and especially of the tyrant +Murphy. I was let into all the secrets of the mess in which the +youngsters were placed by the captain to be instructed and kept in +order. Alas! what instruction did we get but blasphemy? What order +were we kept in, except that of paying our mess, and being forbidden +to partake of those articles which our money had purchased? My blood +boiled when they related all they had suffered, and I vowed I would +sooner die than submit to such treatment. + +The hour of bed-time arrived. I was instructed how to get into my +hammock, and laughed at for tumbling out on the opposite side. I was +forced to submit to this pride of conscious superiority of these +urchins who could only boast of a few months' more practical +experience than myself, and who, therefore, called me a greenhorn. But +all this was done in good nature; and after a few hearty laughs from +my companions, I gained the centre of my suspended bed, and was very +soon in a sound sleep. This was only allowed to last till about four +o'clock in the morning, when down came the head of my hammock, and I +fell to the deck, with my feet still hanging in the air, like poor +Sally, when she caught the crab. Stunned and stupefied by the fall, +bewildered by the violent concussion and the novelty of all around me, +I continued in a state of somnambulism, and it was some minutes before +I could recollect myself. + +The marine sentinel at the gun-room door seeing what had happened, and +also espying the person to whom I was indebted for this favour, very +kindly came to my assistance. He knotted my lanyard, and restored my +hammock to its place; but he could not persuade me to confide myself +again to such treacherous bedposts, for I thought the rope had broken; +and so strongly did the fear of another tumble possess my mind, that +I took a blanket, and lay down on a chest at some little distance, +keeping a sleepless eye directed to the scene of my late disaster. + +This was fortunate; for not many minutes had elapsed, when Murphy, who +had been relieved from the middle watch, came below, and seeing my +hammock again hanging up, and supposing me in it, took out his knife +and cut it down. "So then," said I to myself, "it was you who invaded +my slumbers, and nearly dashed my brains out, and have now made the +second attempt." I vowed to Heaven that I would have revenge; and +I acquitted myself of that vow. Like the North American savage, +crouching lest he should see me, I waited patiently till he had got +into his hammock, and was in a sound sleep. I then gently pushed a +shot-case under the head of his hammock, and placed the corner of it +so as to receive his head; for had it split his skull I should not +have cared, so exasperated was I, and so bent on revenge. Subtle +and silent, I then cut his lanyard: he fell, and his head coming in +contact with the edge of the shot-case, he gave a deep groan, and +there he lay. I instantly retreated to my chest and blanket, where I +pretended to snore, while the sentinel, who, fortunately for me, had +seen Murphy cut me down the first time, came with his lanthorn, and +seeing him apparently dead, removed the shot-case out of the way, +and then ran to the sergeant of marines, desiring him to bring the +surgeon's assistant. + +While the sergeant was gone, he whispered softly to me, "Lie still; +I saw the whole of it, and if you are found out, it may go hard with +you." + +Murphy, it appeared, had few friends in the ship; all rejoiced at +his accident. I laid very quietly in my blanket while the surgeon's +assistant dressed the wound; and, after a considerable time, succeeded +in restoring the patient to his senses: he was, however, confined a +fortnight to his bed. I was either not suspected, or, if I was, it was +known that I was not the aggressor. The secret was well kept. I gave +the marine a guinea, and took him into my service as _valet de place_. + +And now, reader, in justice to myself, allow me to make a few remarks. +They may serve as a palliative, to a certain degree, for that +unprincipled career which the following pages will expose. The +passions of pride and revenge, implanted in our fallen natures, and +which, if not eradicated in the course of my education, ought, at +least, to have lain dormant as long as possible, were, through the +injudicious conduct of those to whom I had been entrusted, called into +action and full activity at a very early age. The moral seeds sown by +my parents, which might have germinated and produced fruit, were +not watered or attended to; weeds had usurped their place, and were +occupying the ground which should have supported them; and at this +period, when the most assiduous cultivation was necessary to procure +a return, into what a situation was I thrown? In a ship crowded with +three hundred men, each of them, or nearly so, cohabiting with an +unfortunate female, in the lowest state of degradation; where oaths +and blasphemy interlarded every sentence; where religion was wholly +neglected, and the only honour paid to the Almighty was a clean shirt +on a Sunday; where implicit obedience to the will of an officer, was +considered of more importance than the observance of the Decalogue; +and the Commandments of God were in a manner abrogated by the Articles +of War--for the first might be broken with impunity, and even with +applause, while the most severe punishment awaited any infraction of +the latter. + +So much for the ship in the aggregate; let us now survey the +midshipmen's berth. Here we found the same language and the same +manners, with scarcely one shade more of refinement. Their only +pursuits when on shore were intoxication and worse debauchery, to be +gloried in and boasted of when they returned on board. My captain +said that everything found its level in a man-of-war. True; but in +a midshipman's berth it was the level of a savage, where corporal +strength was the _sine qua non_, and decided whether you were to act +the part of a tyrant or a slave. The discipline of public schools, bad +and demoralizing as it is, was light, compared to the tyranny of a +midshipman's berth in 1802. + +A mistaken notion has long prevailed, that boys derive advantages from +suffering under the tyranny of their oppressors at schools; and we +constantly hear the praises of public schools and midshipmen's berths +on this very account--namely, "that boys are taught to find their +level." I do not mean to deny but that the higher orders improve by +collision with their inferiors, and that a young aristocrat is often +brought to his senses by receiving a sound thrashing from the son of a +tradesman. But he that is brought up a slave, will be a tyrant when he +has the power; the worst of our passions are nourished to inflict the +same evil on others which we boast of having suffered ourselves. The +courage and daring spirit of a noble-minded boy is rather broken down +by ill-usage, which he has not the power to resist, or, surmounting +all this, he proudly imbibes a dogged spirit of sullen resistance and +implacable revenge, which become the bane of his future life. + +The latter was my fate; and let not my readers be surprised or +shocked, if, in the course of these adventures, I should display some +of the fruits of that fatal seed, so early and so profusely sown in my +bosom. If, on my first coming into the ship, I shrank back with horror +at the sound of blasphemy and obscenity--if I shut my eyes to +the promiscuous intercourse of the sexes, it was not so long. By +insensible degrees, I became familiarised with vice, and callous +to its approach. In a few months I had become nearly as corrupt as +others. I might indeed have resisted longer; but though the fortress +of virtue could have held out against open violence, it could not +withstand the undermining of ridicule. My young companions, who, as I +have observed, had only preceded me six months in the service, were +already grown old in depravity; they laughed at my squeamishness, +called me "milksop" and "boarding-school miss," and soon made me as +bad as themselves. We had not quite attained the age of perpetration, +but we were fully prepared to meet it when it came. + +I had not been two days on board, when the youngsters proposed a walk +into the main top. I mounted the rigging with perfect confidence, for +I was always a good climber; but I had not proceeded far, when I was +overtaken by the captain of the top and another man, who, without any +ceremony or preface, seized me by each arm, and very deliberately +lashed me fast in the rigging. They laughed at my remonstrance. I +asked what they meant, and the captain of the top said very civilly +taking off his hat at the same time, "that it was the way all gemmen +were sarved when they first went aloft; and I must pay my footing as a +bit of a parkazite." I looked down to the quarter-deck for assistance, +but every one there was laughing at me; and even the very little +rogues of midshipmen who had enticed me up were enjoying the joke. +Seeing this was the case, I only asked what was to pay. The captain of +the top said a seven shilling bit would be thought handsome. This I +promised to give, and was released on my own recognizances. When I +reached the quarter-deck I paid the money. + +Having experienced nothing but cruelty and oppression since I had +been on board, I sorely repented of coming to sea; my only solace was +seeing Murphy, as he lay in his hammock, with his head bound up. This +was a balm to me. "I bide my time," said I; "I will yet be revenged on +all of you;" and so I was. I let none escape: I had them all in their +turns, and glutted my thirst for revenge. + +I had been three weeks on board, when the ship was reported ready for +sea. I had acquired the favour of the first lieutenant by a constant +attention to the little duties he gave me to perform. I had been put +into a watch, and stationed in the fore-top, and quartered at the +foremast guns on the main deck. I was told by the youngsters that the +first lieutenant was a harsh officer, and implacable when once he +took a dislike; his manners, however, even when under the greatest +excitement, were always those of a perfect gentleman, and I continued +living on good terms with him. But with the second lieutenant I was +not so fortunate. He had ordered me to take the jolly-boat and bring +off a woman whom he kept; I remonstrated and refused, and from that +moment we never were friends. + +Murphy had also recovered from his fall, and returned to his duty; +his malice towards me increased, and I had no peace or comfort in his +presence. One day he threw a biscuit at my head, calling me at the +same time a name which reflected on the legitimacy of my birth, in +language the most coarse and vulgar. In a moment all the admonitions +which I had received, and all my sufferings for impetuosity of temper, +were forgotten; the blood boiled in my veins, and trickled from my +wounded forehead. Dizzy, and almost sightless with rage, I seized a +brass candlestick, the bottom of which (to keep it steady at sea) was +loaded with lead, and threw it at him with all my might; had it taken +effect as I intended, that offence would have been his last. It missed +his head, and struck the black servant on the shoulder; the poor man +went howling to the surgeon, in whose care he remained for many days. + +Murphy started up to take instant vengeance, but was held by the other +seniors of the mess, who unanimously declared that such an offence as +mine should be punished in a more solemn manner. A mock trial (without +adverting to the provocation I had received) found me guilty of +insubordination "to the oldsters," and setting a bad example to the +youngsters. I was sentenced to be _cobbed_ with a worsted stocking, +filled with wet sand. I was held down on my face on the mess-table +by four stout midshipmen; the surgeon's assistant held my wrist, to +ascertain if my pulse indicated exhaustion; while Murphy, at his own +particular request, became the executioner. Had it been any other but +him, I should have given vent to my agonizing pain by screams, but +like a sullen Ebo, I was resolved to endure even to death, rather than +gratify him by any expression of pain. After a most severe punishment, +a cold sweat and faintness alarmed the surgeon's assistant. I was then +released, but ordered to mess on my chest for a fortnight by myself. +As soon as I was able to stand, and had recovered my breath, I +declared in the most solemn manner, that a repetition of the offence +should produce the action for which I had suffered, and I would then +appeal to the captain for justice; "and," said I, turning to Murphy, +"it was I who cut down your hammock, and had very nearly knocked out +your brains. I did it in return for your cowardly attack on me; and +I will do it again, if I surfer martyrdom for it; for every act of +tyranny you commit I will have revenge. Try me now, and see if I am +not as good as my word." He grinned, and turned pale, but dared do no +more, for he was a coward. + +I was ordered to quit the berth, which I did, and as I went out, +one of the mates observed, that I was "a proper malignant devil, by +G----." + +This violent scene produced a sort of cessation from hostilities. +Murphy knew that he might expect a decanter at his head or a knife in +his side, if I was provoked; and that peace which I could not gain +from his compassion, I obtained from his fears. The affair made a +noise in the ship. With the officers in the gun-room I lost ground, +because it was misrepresented. With the men I gained favour, because +they hated Murphy. They saw the truth, and admired me for my +determined resistance. + +Sent to Coventry by the officers, I sought the society of the men. I +learned rapidly the practical part of my duty, and profited by the +uncouth criticism of these rough warriors on the defective seamanship +of their superiors. A sort of compact was made between us: they +promised that whenever they deserted, it should not be from my boat +when on duty, and I promised to let them go and drink at public-houses +as long as I could spare them. In spite, however, of this mutual +understanding, two of them violated their faith the night before we +went to sea, and left the boat of which I had charge; and as I had +disobeyed orders in letting them go to a public-house, I was, on my +return to the ship, dismissed from the quarter-deck, and ordered to do +my duty in the fore-top. + + + + +Chapter III + + The might of England flush'd + To anticipate the same; + And her van the fleeter rush'd + O'er the deadly space between. + "Hearts of oak!" our captains cried; when each gun + From its adamantine lips + Spread a death-shade round the ships, + Like the hurricane eclipse + Of the sun. + + CAMPBELL. + + +Considering my youth and inexperience, and the trifling neglect +of which I was accused, there are few, even of the most rigid +disciplinarians, who will not admit that I was both unjustly and +unkindly treated by the first lieutenant, who certainly, with all my +respect for him, had lent himself to my enemies. The second lieutenant +and Mr Murphy did not even conceal their feelings on the occasion, but +exulted over my disgrace. + +The ship was suddenly ordered to Portsmouth, where the captain, who +had been on leave, was expected to join us, which he did soon after +our arrival, when the first lieutenant made his reports of good and +bad conduct during his absence. I had been about ten days doing duty +in the fore-top, and it was the intention of Mr Handstone, to which +the captain seemed not disinclined, to have given me a flogging at +the gun, as a gratuity for losing the men. This part of the sentence, +however, was not executed. I continued a member of the midshipmen's +mess, but was not allowed to enter the berth: my meals were sent to +me, and I took them _solus_ on my chest. The youngsters spoke to me, +but only by stealth, being afraid of the oldsters, who had sent me to +the most rigid Coventry. + +My situation in the fore-top was nearly nominal. I went aloft when the +hands were called, or in my watch, and amused myself with a book until +we went below, unless there was any little duty for me to do, which +did not appear above my strength. The men doated on me as a martyr in +their cause, and delighted in giving me every instruction in the art +of knotting and splicing, rigging, reefing, furling, &c, &c.; and I +honestly own that the happiest hours I had passed in that ship were +during my seclusion among these honest tars. + +Whether my enemies discovered this or not, I cannot say; but shortly +after our arrival I was sent for by the captain into his own cabin, +where I received a lecture on my misconduct, both as to my supposed +irritable and quarrelsome disposition, and also for losing the men out +of the boat. "In other respects," he added, "your punishment would +have been much more severe but for your general good conduct; and I +have no doubt, from this little well-timed severity, that you will in +future conduct yourself with more propriety. I therefore release you +from the disgraceful situation in which you are placed, and allow you +to return to your duty on the quarter-deck." + +The tears which no brutality or ill-treatment could wring from me, now +flowed in abundance, and it was some minutes before I could recover +myself sufficiently to thank him for his kindness, and to explain the +cause of my disgrace. I told him, that since I had joined the ship I +had been treated like a dog; that he alone had been ignorant of it, +and that he alone had behaved to me with humanity. I then related all +my sufferings, from the moment of that fatal glass of wine up to +the time I was speaking. I did not conceal the act of cutting down +Murphy's hammock, nor of throwing the candlestick at his head. I +assured him I never gave any provocation; that I never struck without +being first stricken. I said, moreover, that I would never receive a +blow or be called an improper name without resenting it, as far as +I was able. It was my nature, and if killed, I could not help it. +"Several men have run away," said I, "since I came into the ship and +before, and the officers under whose charge they were only received a +reprimand, while I, who have just come to sea, have been treated with +the greatest and most degrading severity." + +The captain listened to my defence with attention, and I thought +seemed very much struck with it. I afterwards learnt that Mr Handstone +had received a reprimand for his harsh treatment of me; he observed, +that I should one day turn out a shining character, or go to the +devil. + +It appeared pretty evident to me, that however I might have roused +the pride and resentment of the senior members of the mess by my +resistance to arbitrary power, that I had gained some powerful +friends, among whom was the captain. Many of the officers admired that +dogged, "don't care" spirit of resistance which I so perseveringly +displayed, and were forced to admit that I had right on my side. I +soon perceived the change of mind by the frequency of invitations to +the cabin and gun-room tables. The youngsters were proud to receive me +again openly as their associate; but the oldsters regarded me with +a jealousy and suspicion like that of an unpopular government to a +favourite radical leader. + +I soon arranged with the boys of my own age a plan of resistance, or +rather of self-defence, which proved of great importance in our future +warfare. One or two of them had nerve enough to follow it up: the +others made fair promises, but fell off in the hour of trial. My code +consisted of only two maxims: the first was always to throw a bottle, +decanter, candlestick, knife, or fork, at the head of any person who +should strike one of us, if the assailant should appear too strong to +encounter in fair fight. The second was, never to allow ourselves to +be unjustly defrauded of our rights; to have an equal share of what we +paid equally for; and to gain by artifice that which was withheld by +force. + +I explained to them that by the first plan we should ensure civility, +at least; for as tyrants are generally cowards, they would be afraid +to provoke that anger which in some unlucky moment might be fatal to +them, or maim them for life. By the second, I promised to procure them +an equal share in the good things of this life, the greater part of +which the oldsters engrossed to themselves: in this latter we were +much more unanimous than the former, as it incurred less personal +risk. I was the projector of all the schemes for forage, and was +generally successful. + +At length we sailed to join the fleet off Cadiz, under the command of +Lord Nelson. I shall not pretend to describe the passage down Channel +and across the Bay of Biscay. I was sea-sick as a lady in a Dover +packet, until inured to the motion of the ship by the merciless calls +to my duties aloft, or to relieve the deck in my watch. + +We reached our station, and joined the immortal Nelson but a few hours +before that battle in which he lost his life and saved his country. +The history of that important day has been so often and so +circumstantially related, that I cannot add much more to the stock +on hand. I am only astonished, seeing the confusion and _invariable +variableness_ of a sea-light, how so much could be known. One +observation occurred to me then, and I have thought of it ever since +with redoubled conviction; this was, that the admiral, after the +battle began, was no admiral at all: he could neither see nor be seen; +he could take no advantage of the enemy's weak points or defend his +own; his ship, the _Victory_, one of our finest three-deckers, was, in +a manner, tied up alongside a French eighty-gun ship. + +These observations I have read in some naval work, and in my mind +they receive ample confirmation. I could not help feeling an agony of +anxiety (young as I was) for my country's glory, when I saw the noble +leaders of our two lines exposed to the united fire of so many ships. +I thought Nelson was too much exposed, and think so now. Experience +has confirmed what youthful fancy suggested; the enemy's centre should +have been _macadamized_ by our seven three-deckers, some of which, by +being placed in the rear, had little share in the action; and but for +the intimidation which their presence afforded, might as well have +been at Spithead. I mean no reflection on the officers who had charge +of them: accidental concurrence of light wind and station in the line, +threw them at such a distance from the enemy as kept them in the back +ground the greater part of the day. + +Others, again, were in enviable situations, but did not, as far as I +could learn from the officers, do quite so much as they might have +done. This defect on our part being met by equal disadvantages, +arising from nearly similar causes, on that of the enemy, a clear +victory remained to us. The aggregate of the British navy is brave and +good; and we must admit that in this day "when England expected +every man to do his duty," there were but few who disappointed their +country's hopes. + +When the immortal signal was communicated, I shall never, no, never, +forget the electric effect it produced through the fleet. I can +compare it to nothing so justly as to a match laid to a long train of +gunpowder; and as Englishmen are the same, the same feeling, the same +enthusiasm, was displayed in every ship; tears ran down the cheeks of +many a noble fellow when the affecting sentence was made known. +It recalled every past enjoyment, and filled the mind with fond +anticipations which, with many, were never, alas! to be realised. They +went down to their guns without confusion; and a cool, deliberate +courage from that moment seemed to rest on the countenance of every +man I saw. + +My captain, though not in the line, was no niggard in the matter of +shot, and though he had no real business to come within range until +called by signal, still he thought it his duty to be as near to our +ships engaged as possible, in order to afford them assistance when +required. I was stationed at the foremost guns on the main deck, and +the ship cleared for action; and though on a comparatively small +scale, I cannot imagine a more solemn, grand, or impressive sight, +than a ship prepared as ours was on that occasion. Her noble tier of +guns, in a line gently curving out towards the centre; the tackle laid +across the deck; the shot and wads prepared in ample store (round, +grape, and canister); the powder-boys, each with his box full, seated +on it, with perfect apparent indifference as to the approaching +conflict. The captains of guns, with their priming boxes buckled round +their waists; the locks fixed upon the guns; the lanyards laid around +them; the officers, with their swords drawn, standing by their +respective divisions. + +The quarter-deck was commanded by the captain in person, assisted by +the first lieutenant, the lieutenant of marines, a party of small-arm +men, with the mate and midshipmen, and a portion of seamen to attend +the braces and fight the quarter-deck guns. The boatswain was on the +forecastle; the gunner in the magazine, to send up a supply of powder +to the guns; the carpenter watched and reported, from time to time, +the depth of water in the well; he also walked round the wings or +vacant spaces between the ship's side and the cables, and other +stores. He was attended by his mates, who were provided with +shot-plugs, oakum, and tallow, to stop any shot-holes which might be +made. + +The surgeon was in the cockpit with his assistants. The knives, saws, +tourniquets, sponges, basins, wine and water, were all displayed and +ready for the first unlucky patient that might be presented. This was +more awful to me than anything I had seen. "How soon," thought I, "may +I be stretched, mangled and bleeding, on this table, and have occasion +for all the skill and all the instruments I now see before me!" I +turned away, and endeavoured to forget it all. + +As soon as the fleet bore up to engage the enemy, we did the same, +keeping as near as we could to the admiral, whose signals we were +ordered to repeat. I was particularly astonished with the skilful +manner in which this was done. It was wonderful to see how +instantaneously the same flags were displayed at our mast-heads as had +been hoisted by the admiral; and the more wonderful this appeared to +me, since his flags were rolled up in round balls, which were not +broken loose until they had reached the mast-head, so that the signal +officers of a repeater had to make out the number of the flag during +its passage aloft in disguise. This was done by the power of good +telescopes, and from habit, and sometimes by anticipation of the +signal that would be next made. + +The reader may perhaps not be aware that among civilised nations, in +naval warfare, ships of the line never fire at frigates, unless they +provoke hostility by interposing between belligerent ships, or firing +into them, as was the case in the Nile, when Sir James Saumarez, in +the _Orion_, was under the necessity of sinking the _Artemise_, which +he did with one broadside, as a reward for her temerity. Under this +_pax in bellum_ sort of compact we might have come off scot-free, had +we not partaken very liberally of the shot intended for larger ships, +which did serious damage among our people. + +The two British lines running down parallel to each other, and nearly +perpendicular to the crescent line of the combined fleets, was the +grandest sight that was ever witnessed. As soon as our van was within +gun-shot of the enemy, they opened their fire on the _Royal Sovereign_ +and the _Victory_; but when the first-named of these noble ships +rounded to, under the stern of the _Santa Anna_, and the _Victory_ had +very soon after laid herself on board the _Redoubtable_, the clouds +of smoke enveloped both fleets, and little was to be seen except the +falling of masts, and here and there, as the smoke blew away, a ship +totally dismasted. + +One of these proved to be English, and our captain, seeing her between +two of the enemy, bore up to take her in tow: at the same time, one +of our ships of the line opened a heavy fire on one of the French +line-of-battle ships, unluckily situated in a right line between us, +so that the shot which missed the enemy sometimes came on board of us. +I was looking out of the bow port at the moment that a shot struck our +ship on the stern between wind and water. It was the first time I had +ever seen the effect of a heavy shot; it made a great splash, and to +me as I then thought, a very unusual noise, throwing a great deal of +water in my face. I very naturally started back, as I believe many a +brave fellow has done. Two of the seamen quartered at my guns laughed +at me. I felt ashamed, and resolved to show no more such weakness. + +This shot was very soon succeeded by some others not quite so +harmless: one came into the bow port, and killed the two men who had +witnessed my trepidation. My pride having been hurt that these men +should have seen me flinch, I will own that I was secretly pleased +when I saw them removed beyond the reach of human interrogation. It +would be difficult to describe my feelings on this occasion. Not six +weeks before, I was the robber of hen-roosts and gardens--the hero of +a horse-pond, ducking an usher--now suddenly, and almost without any +previous warning or reflection, placed in the midst of carnage, and an +actor of one of those grand events by which the fate of the civilised +world was to be decided. + +A quickened circulation of blood, a fear of immediate death, and a +still greater fear of shame, forced me to an involuntary and frequent +change of position; and it required some time, and the best powers of +intellect, to reason myself into that frame of mind in which I could +feel as safe and as unconcerned as if we had been in harbour. To this +state I at last did attain, and soon felt ashamed of the perturbation +under which I had laboured before the firing began. I prayed, it is +true: but my prayer was not that of faith, of trust, or of hope--I +prayed only for safety from imminent personal danger; and my orisons +consisted of one or two short, pious ejaculations, without a thought +of repentance for the past or amendment for the future. + +But when we had once got fairly into action, I felt no more of +this, and beheld a poor creature cut in two by a shot with the same +indifference that at any other time I should have seen a butcher kill +an ox. Whether my heart was bad or not, I cannot say; but I certainly +felt my curiosity was gratified more than my feelings were shocked +when a raking shot killed seven and wounded three more. I was sorry +for the men, and, for the world, would not have injured them; but +I had a philosophic turn of mind; I liked to judge of causes and +effects; and I was secretly pleased at seeing the effect of a raking +shot. + +Towards four P.M. the firing began to abate, the smoke cleared away, +and the calm sea became ruffled with an increasing breeze. The two +hostile fleets were quiet spectators of each other's disasters. We +retained possession of nineteen or twenty sail of the line. Some of +the enemy's ships were seen running away into Cadiz; while four others +passed to windward of our fleet, and made their escape. A boat going +from our ship to one near us, I jumped into her, and learned the death +of Lord Nelson, which I communicated to the captain, who, after paying +a tribute to the memory of that great man, looked at me with much +complacency. I was the only youngster that had been particularly +active, and he immediately despatched me with a message to a ship at +a short distance. The first lieutenant asked if he should not send an +officer of more experience. "No," said the captain, "he shall go; the +boy knows very well what he is about!" and away I went, not a little +proud of the confidence placed in me. + +Further details of this eventful day are to be found recorded in our +national histories; it will, therefore, be needless to repeat them +here. When I met my messmates at supper in the berth, I was sorry to +see Murphy among them. I had flattered myself that some fortunate shot +would have for ever divested me of any further care on his account; +but his time was not come. + +"The devil has had a fine haul to-day!" said an old master's mate, as +he took up his glass of grog. + +"Pity you, and some others I could name, had not been in the net!" +thinks I to myself. + +"I hope plenty of the lieutenants are bowled out!" said another; "we +shall stand some chance then of a little promotion!" + +When the hands were turned up to muster, the number of killed amounted +to nine, and wounded to thirteen. When this was made known, there +seemed to be a general smile of congratulation at the number fallen, +rather than of their regret for their loss. The vanity of the officers +seemed tickled at the disproportionate slaughter in a frigate of our +size, as compared to what they had heard the ships of the line had +suffered. + +I attended the surgeon in the steerage, to which place the wounded +were removed, and saw all the amputations performed, without +flinching; while men who had behaved well in the action fainted at +the sight. I am afraid I almost took a pleasure in observing the +operations of the surgeon, without once reflecting on the pain +suffered by the patient. Habit had now begun to corrupt my mind. I was +not cruel by nature; I loved the deep investigation of hidden things; +and this day's action gave me a very clear insight into the anatomy +of the human frame, which I had seen cut in two by shot, lacerated by +splinters, carved out with knives, and separated with saws. + +Soon after the action, we were ordered to Spithead, with duplicate +despatches. One morning I heard a midshipman say, "he would do his old +father out of a new kit." I inquired what that meant, was first called +a greenhorn for not knowing, and then had it explained to me. "Don't +you know," said my instructor, "that after every action there is more +canvas, rope, and paint, expended in the warrant-officer's accounts +than were destroyed by the enemy?" + +I assented to this on the credit of the informer, without knowing +whether it was true or false, and he proceeded. "How are we to have +white hammock-clothes, sky-sail masts, and all other finery, besides a +coat of paint for the ship's sides every six weeks, if we don't expend +all these things in action, and pretend they were lost overboard, or +destroyed? The list of defects are given in to the admiral, he signs +the demand, and the old commissioner must come down with the stores, +whether he will or not. I was once in a sloop of war, when a large +forty-four-gun frigate ran on board of us, carried away her jib-boom, +and left her large fine-weather jib hanging on our foreyard. It was +made of beautiful Russia duck, and to be sure, didn't we make a gang +of white hammock-cloths, fore and aft, besides white trousers for the +men? Well now, you must know, that as we make _Uncle George_ suffer +for the stores, so I mean to make dad suffer for my traps. I mean to +lose my chest overboard with all my 'kit,' and return home to him and +the old woman just fit for the fashion." + +"And do you really mean to deceive your father and mother in that +way?" replied I, with much apparent innocence. + +"Do I? to be sure I do, you flat. How am I to keep up my stock, if I +don't make the proper use of an action like this that we have been +in?" + +I took the hint: it never once occurred to me, that if I had fairly +and candidly stated to my parents that my stock of clothes were +insufficient for my appearance as a gentleman on the quarter-deck, +that they would cheerfully have increased it to any reasonable extent. +But I had been taught artifice and cunning; I could tell the truth +where I thought it served my purpose, as well as a lie; but here I +thought deception was a proof at once of spirit and of merit; and I +resolved to practise it, if only to raise myself a trifling degree +in the estimation of my unworthy associates. I had become partial to +deception from habit, and preferred exercising my own ingenuity +in outwitting my father, to obtaining what I needed by more +straightforward and honourable measures. + +The ship needed some repairs, and by the indulgence of the captain, +who was pleased with my conduct, I, who required so much instruction +in the nature and cause of her defects, was allowed to be absent while +they were made good. By this oversight, I lost all that improvement +which I should have gained by close attention to the unrigging or +shipping of the ship; the manner of returning her stores; taking out +her masts and ballast, and seeing her taken into dock; the shape of +her bottom, and the good or bad qualities which might be supposed to +accelerate or retard her movements. All this was sacrificed to the +impatience of seeing my parents; to the vainglory of boasting of the +action in which I had been present; and, perhaps, of being encouraged +to tell lies of things which I never saw, and to talk of feats which I +never performed. I loved effect; and I timed the moment of my return +to my father's house (through a correspondence with my sister) to be +just as a large party had sat down to a sumptuous dinner. I had only +been absent three months, it is true; but it was my first cruise, +and then "I had seen so much, and been in such very interesting +situations." + + + + +Chapter IV + + 'Twill be time to go home. What shall I say I have done? It must + be a very plausive invention that carries it. I find my tongue is + too foolhardy.--SHAKESPEARE. + + +Reaching the well known mansion of my father, I knocked softly at the +front door, was admitted, and, without saying a word to the servant, +rushed to the head of the dining-room table, and threw my arms round +my mother's neck, who only screamed, "Good heavens, my child!" and +fell into hysterics. My father, who was in the very midst of helping +his soup, jumped up to embrace me and assist my mother. The company +all rose, like a covey of partridges: one lady spoiled a new pink +satin gown by a tip of the elbow from her next neighbour, just as a +spoonful of soup had reached "the rosy portals of her mouth;" the +little spaniel, Carlo, set up a loud and incessant bark; and in one +minute the whole comely arrangement of the feast was converted into +anarchy and confusion. + +Order was, however, soon restored: my mother recovered her +composure--my father shook me by the hand--the company all agreed that +I was a very fine, interesting boy--the ladies resumed their seats, +and I had the satisfaction to observe that my sudden appearance had +not deprived them of their appetites. I soon convinced them that +in this particular, at least, I also was in high training. My +midshipman's life had neither disqualified nor disgusted me with the +luxuries of the table; nor did I manifest the slightest backwardness +or diffidence when invited by the gentlemen to take wine. I answered +every question with such fluency of speech, and such compound interest +of words, as sometimes caused the propounder to regret that he had put +me to the trouble of speaking. + +I gave a very florid description of the fight; praised some admirals +and captains for their bravery, sneered at others, and accused a few +of right down misconduct. Now and then, by way of carrying conviction +into my auditors' very souls, I rammed home my charges with an oath, +at which my father looked grave, my mother held up her finger, the +gentlemen laughed, and the ladies all said with a smile, "Sweet +boy!--what animation!--what sense!--what discernment!" Thinks I to +myself, "You are as complete a set of gulls as ever picked up a bit of +biscuit!" + +Next morning, while my recent arrival was still warm, I broke the +subject of my chest to my father and mother at breakfast; indeed, my +father, very fortunately for me, began by inquiring how my stock of +clothes held out. + +"Bad enough," said I, as I demolished the third egg, for I still had a +good appetite at breakfast. + +"Bad enough!" repeated my father, "why you were extremely well fitted +with everything." + +"Very true, sir," said I; "but then you don't know what a man-of-war +is in clearing for action; everything not too hot or too heavy is +chucked overboard with as little ceremony as I swallow this muffin. +'Whose hat-box is this?' 'Mr Spratt's, sir.' 'D----n Mr Spratt, I'll +teach him to keep his hat-box safe another time; over with it'--and +away it went over the lee gangway. Spratt's father was a hatter in +Bond Street, so we all laughed." + +"And pray, Frank," said my mother, "did your box go in the same way?" + +"It kept company, I assure you. I watched them go astern, with tears +in my eyes, thinking how angry you would be." + +"Well, but the chest, Frank, what became of the chest? You said that +the Vandals had some respect for heavy objects, and yours, I am sure, +to my cost, had very considerable specific gravity." + +"That's very true, sir; but you have no notion how much it was +lightened the first day the ship got to sea. I was lying on it as sick +as a whale--the first lieutenant and mate of the lower deck came down +to see if the men's berths were clean; I, and my Noah's ark, lay slap +in the way--'Who have we here?' said Mr Handstone. 'Only Mr Mildmay, +and his chest, sir,' said the sergeant of marines, into whose +territory I acknowledged I had made very considerable incroachments. +'Only!' repeated the lieutenant, 'I thought it had been one of the +big stones for the new bridge, and the owner of it a drunken Irish +hodman.' I was too sick to care much about what they said." + +"You forget your breakfast," said my sister. + +"I'll thank you for another muffin, and another cup of coffee," said +I. + +"Poor fellow!" said my mother, "what he must have suffered!" + +"Oh! I have not told you half yet, my dear mother; I only wonder I am +alive." + +"Alive, indeed!" said my Aunt Julia; "here, my dear, here is a small +trifle to help you to replenish the stock you have lost in the service +of your country. Noble little fellow! what should we do without +sailors?" + +I pocketed the little donation--it was a ten-pounder; finished my +breakfast, by adding a slice of ham and half a French roll to the +articles already shipped, and then continued my story. "The first +thing Mr Handstone said, was, that my chest was too big; and the next +thing he said, was, 'tell the carpenter I want him. Here, Mr Adze, +take this chest; reduce it one foot in length, and one in height.' +'Ay, ay, sir,' said Adze; 'come, young gentleman, move off, and give +me your key.' Sick as I was, I knew remonstrance or prayer were alike +useless, so I crawled off and presented my key to the carpenter, who +very deliberately unlocked, and as expeditiously unloaded all my +treasure. The midshipmen all gathered round. The jars of preserves and +the cakes of gingerbread which you, my dearest mother, had so nicely +packed up for me, were seized with greediness, and devoured before my +face. One of them thrust his filthy paw into a pot of black currant +jelly, which you gave me for a sore throat, and held a handful of it +to my mouth, knowing at the same time that I was ready to be sea-sick +in his hand." + +"I shall never bear the sight of jelly again," said my sister. + +"The nasty brutes!" said my aunt. + +"Well," I resumed, "all my nice things went; and, sick as I was, I +wished them gone; but when they laughed and spoke disrespectfully of +you, my dear mother, I was ready to fly up and tear their eyes out." + +"Never mind, my dear boy," said my mother, "we will make all right +again." + +"So I suppose we must," said my father; "but no more jelly and +ginger-bread, if you please, my dear. Proceed with your story, Frank." + +"Well, sir, in half-an-hour my chest was ready for me again; but while +they were about it, they might have taken off another foot, for I +found ample space to stow what the plunderers had left. The preserve +jars, being all empty, were given of course to the marines; and some +other heavy articles being handed away, I was no longer puzzled how +to stow them. After this, you know, sir, we had the action, and then +chest and bedding and all went to the ----." + +"Do they throw all the chests and bedding overboard on these +occasions?" said my father, with a cool and steady gaze in my face, +which I had some trouble in facing back again. + +"Yes; always everything that is in the way, and my chest was in the +way, and away it went. You know, sir, I could not knock down the first +lieutenant: they would have hanged me at the yard-arm." + +"Thank Heaven, you did not, my love," said my mother; "what _has_ +happened can be repaired, but _that_ could never have been got over. +And your books, what is become of them?" + +"All went in the lump. They are somewhere near the entrance of the Gut +of Gibraltar--all lost except my Bible: I saved that, as I happened to +be reading it in my berth the night before the action!" + +"Excellent boy!" exclaimed my mother and aunt both together; "I am +sure he speaks the truth." + +"I hope he does," said my father, drily; "though it must be owned that +these sea-fights, however glorious for Old England, are very expensive +amusements to the parents of young midshipmen, unless the boys happen +to be knocked on the head." + +Whether my father began to smell a rat, or whether he was afraid of +putting more questions, for fear of hearing more fibs, I know not, but +I was not sorry when the narrative was concluded, and I dismissed with +flying colours. + +To my shame be it spoken, the Bible that assisted me so much in my +mother's opinion, had never but once been opened since I had left +home, and that was to examine if there were any bank-notes between the +leaves, having heard of such things being done, merely to try whether +young gentlemen did "search the Scriptures." + +My demands were all made good. I believe with the greater celerity, as +I began to grow very tiresome; my _sea_ manners were not congenial to +the drawing-room. My mother, aunt, and sister, were very different +from the females I had been in the habit of seeing on board the +frigate. My oaths and treatment of the servants, male and female, all +conspired to reconcile the family to my departure. They therefore +heard with pleasure that my leave was expired; and, having obtained +all I wanted, I did not care one pin how soon I got clear of them; +so when the coach came to the door, I jumped in, drove to the Golden +Cross, and the next morning rejoined my ship. + +I was received with cheerfulness and cordiality by most of my +shipmates, except Murphy and some of his cronies; nor did one feeling +of regret or compunction enter my mind for the lies and hypocrisy with +which I had deceived and cheated my parents. The reader will probably +be aware that except the circumstance of reducing the size of my +chest, and the seizure and confiscation of my jars and gingerbread, +there was scarcely a vestige of truth in my story. That I had lost +most of my things was most true; but they were lost by my own +carelessness, and not by being thrown overboard. After losing the key +of my chest, which happened the day I joined, a rapid decrease of my +stock convinced the first lieutenant that a much smaller package might +be made of the remainder, and this was the sole cause of my chest +being converted into a razée. + +My fresh stock of clothes I brought down in a trunk, which I found +very handy, and contrived to keep in better order than I had formerly +done. The money given me to procure more bedding, I pocketed: indeed +I began to grow cunning. I perceived that the best-dressed midshipmen +had always the most pleasant duties to perform. I was sent to bring +off parties of ladies who came to visit the ship, and to dine with the +captain and officers. I had a tolerably good address, and was reckoned +a very handsome boy; and though stout of my age, the ladies admitted +me to great freedom under pretence of my being still a dear little +darling of a middy, and so perfectly innocent in my mind and manners. +The fact is, I was kept in much better order on board my ship than I +was in my father's house--so much for the habit of discipline; but +this was all outside show. My father was a man of talent, and knew the +world, but he knew nothing of the navy; and when I had got him out of +his depth, I served him as I did the usher: that is, I soused him and +his company head over heels in the horse-pond of their own ignorance. +Such is the power of local knowledge and cunning over abstruse science +and experience. + +So much assurance had I acquired by my recent success in town, that +my self-confidence was increased to an incredible degree. My apparent +candour, impudence, and readiness gave a currency to the coinings of +my brain which far surpassed the dull matter-of-fact of my unwary +contemporaries. + +Of my boyish days, I have now almost said enough. The adventures of +a midshipman, during the first three years of his probationary life, +might, if fully detailed, disgust more than amuse, and corrupt more +than they would improve; I therefore pass on to the age of sixteen, +when my person assumed an outline of which I had great reason to be +proud, since I often heard it the subject of encomium among the fair +sex, and their award was confirmed even by my companions. + +My mind kept pace with my person in every acquirement save those of +morality and religion. In these, alas! I became daily more and more +deficient, and for a time lost sight of them altogether. The manly, +athletic frame, and noble countenance, with which I was blessed, +served to render me only more like a painted sepulchre--all was foul +within. Like a beautiful snake, whose poison is concealed under the +gold and azure of its scales, my inward man was made up of pride, +revenge, deceit, and selfishness, and my best talents were generally +applied to the worst purposes. + +In the knowledge of my profession I made rapid progress, because I +delighted in it, and because my mind, active and elastic as my body, +required and fed on scientific research. I soon became an expert +navigator and a good practical seaman, and all this I acquired by +my own application. We had no schoolmaster; and while the other +youngsters learned how to work a common day's work from the +instruction of the older midshipmen, I, who was no favourite with the +latter, was rejected from their coteries. I determined, therefore, to +supply the deficiency myself, and this I was enabled to do by the help +of a good education. I had been well grounded in mathematics, and was +far advanced in Euclid and algebra, previous to leaving school: thus I +had a vast superiority over my companions. + +The great difficulty was to renew my application to study, after many +months of idleness. This, however, I accomplished, and after having +been one year at sea, kept a good reckoning and sent in my day's work +to the captain. The want of instruction which I first felt in the +study of navigation, proved in the end of great service to me: I was +forced to study more intensely, and to comprehend the principles +on which I founded my theory, so that I was prepared to prove by +mathematical demonstration, what others could only assert who worked +by "inspection." + +The pride of surpassing my seniors, and the hope of exposing their +ignorance, stimulated me to inquiry, and roused me to application. The +books which I had reported lost to my father, were handed out from the +bottom of my chest, and read with avidity: many others I borrowed from +the officers, whom I must do the justice to say, not only lent them +with cheerfulness, but offered me the use of their cabin to study in. + +Thus I acquired a taste for reading. I renewed my acquaintance with +the classic authors. Horace and Virgil, licentious but alluring, drove +me back to the study of Latin, and fixed in my mind a knowledge of the +dead languages, at the expense of my morals. Whether the exchange were +profitable or not, is left to wiser heads than mine to decide; my +business is with facts only. + +Thus, while the ungenerous malice of the elder midshipmen thought to +have injured me by leaving me in ignorance, they did me the greatest +possible service, by throwing me on my own resources. I continued on +pretty nearly the same terms with my shipmates to the last. With some +of the mess-room officers I was still in disgrace, and was always +disliked by the oldsters in my own mess; with the younger midshipmen +and the foremast men I was a favourite. I was too proud to be a +tyrant, and the same feeling prevented my submitting to tyranny. As I +increased in strength and stature, I showed more determined resistance +to arbitrary power: an occasional turn-up with boys of my own size +(for the best friends will quarrel), and the supernumerary midshipmen +sent on board for a passage, generally ended in establishing my +dominion or insuring for me a peaceable neutrality. + +I became a scientific pugilist, and now and then took a brush with an +oldster; and although overpowered, yet I displayed so much prowess, +that my enemies became cautious how they renewed a struggle which they +perceived became daily more arduous; till at last, like the lion's +whelp, my play ceased to be a joke, and I was left to enjoy that +tranquillity, which few found it safe or convenient to disturb. By +degrees the balance of power was fairly established, and even Murphy +was awed into civil silence. + +In addition to my well known increase in personal strength, I acquired +a still greater superiority over my companions by the advantage of +education; and this I took great care to make them feel on every +occasion. I was appealed to in all cases of literary disputation, and +was, by general consent, the umpire of the steerage. I was termed +"good company,"--not always to the advantage of the possessor of such +a talent; for it often tends, as it did with me, to lead into very bad +company. I had a fine voice, and played on one or two instruments. +This frequently procured me invitations to the gun-room, and excuses +from duty, together with more wine or grog than was of service to me, +and conversation that I had better not have heard. + +We were ordered on a cruise to the coast of France; and as the junior +port-admiral had a spite against our captain, he swore by ---- that +go we should, ready or not ready. Our signal was made to weigh, while +lighters of provisions, and the powder-boy with our powder, were lying +alongside--the quarter-deck guns all adrift, and not even mounted. Gun +after gun from the _Royal William_ was repeated by the _Gladiator_, +the flag-ship of the harbour-admiral, and with our signal to part +company. + +The captain, not knowing how the story might travel up by telegraph to +London, and conscious, perhaps, that he had left a little too much +to the first lieutenant, "tore the ship away by the hair of the +head"--unmoored, bundled everything in upon deck out of the +lighters--turned all the women out of the ship, except five or six of +the most abandoned--and, with a strong northerly wind, ran down +to Yarmouth Roads, and through the Needles to sea, in a state of +confusion and disaster which I hope never to see again. + +The rear-admiral, Sir Hurricane Humbug, stood on the platform looking +at us (I was afterwards told), and was heard to exclaim, "D----n his +eyes" (meaning our captain), "there he goes at last! I was afraid that +that fellow would have grounded on his beef bones before we should +have got him out!" + +"The more haste the less speed," is oftener true in naval affairs than +in any other situation of life. With us it had nearly proved fatal to +the ship. Had we met with an enemy, we must either have disgraced the +flag by running away, or been taken. + +No sooner clear of the Needles than night came on, and with it a heavy +gale of wind at north-north-west. The officers and men were at work +till four in the morning, securing the boats, booms, and anchors, +clearing the decks of provisions, and setting up the lower rigging, +which by the labour of the ship, had begun to stretch to an alarming +degree; by great exertion this was accomplished, and the guns secured +before the gale had increased to a hurricane. + +About nine the next morning, a poor marine, a recruit from Portsmouth, +unfortunately fell overboard; and though many brave fellows instantly +jumped into one of the quarter-boats, and begged to be lowered down to +save him, the captain, who was a cool calculator, thought the chance +of losing seven men was greater than that of saving one, so the poor +fellow was left to his fate. The ship, it is true, was hove to; but +she drifted to leeward much faster than the unfortunate man could +swim, though he was one of the best swimmers I ever beheld. + +It was heart-breaking to see the manly but ineffectual exertions made +by this gallant youth to regain the ship; but all his powers only +served to prolong his misery. We saw him nearly a mile to windward, +at one moment riding on the top of the mountainous wave, at the next, +sinking into the deep valley between, till at last we saw him no more! +His sad fate was long deplored in the ship. I thought at the time that +the captain was cruel in not sending a boat for him; but I am now +convinced, from experience, that he submitted only to hard necessity, +and chose the lesser evil of the two. + +The fate of this young man was a serious warning to me. I had +become, from habit, so extremely active, and fond of displaying my +newly-acquired gymnastics, called by the sailors "sky-larking" that my +speedy exit was often prognosticated by the old quarter-masters, and +even by the officers. It was clearly understood that I was either to +be drowned or was to break my neck; for the latter I took my chance +pretty fairly, going up and down the rigging like a monkey. Few of the +topmen could equal me in speed, still fewer surpass me in feats of +daring activity. I could run along the topsail yards out to the +yard-arm, go from one mast to the other by the stays, or down on deck +in the twinkling of an eye by the topsail halyards; and, as I knew +myself to be an expert swimmer, I cared little about the chance of +being drowned; but when I witnessed the fate of the poor marine, who I +saw could swim as well, if not better than myself, I became much more +cautious. I perceived that there might be situations in which swimming +could be of no use; and however beloved I might have been by the +sailors, it was evident that, even if they had the inclination, they +might not always have the power to relieve me: from this time, I +became much more guarded in my movements aloft. + +A circumstance occurred shortly after we got to sea which afforded +me infinite satisfaction. Murphy, whose disposition led him to bully +every one whom he thought he could master, fixed a quarrel on a very +quiet, gentlemanly young man, a supernumerary midshipman, who had +come on board for a passage to his own ship, then down in the Bay of +Biscay. The young man, resenting this improper behaviour, challenged +Murphy to fight, and the challenge was accepted; but as the +supernumerary was engaged to dine with the captain, he proposed that +the meeting should not take place till after dinner, not wishing to +exhibit a black eye at the captain's table. This was considered by +Murphy as an evasion; and he added further insult by saying that he +supposed his antagonist wanted Dutch courage, and that if he did not +get wine enough in the cabin, he would not fight at all. + +The high-spirited youth made no reply to this insolence; but, having +dressed himself, went up to dinner; that over, and after the muster at +quarters, he called Mr Murphy into the steerage, and gave him as sound +a drubbing as he ever received in his life. The fight, or set-to, +lasted only a quarter of an hour, and the young supernumerary +displayed so much science, and such a thorough use of his fists, as to +defy the brutal force of his opponent, who could not touch him, and +who was glad to retreat to his berth, followed by the groans and +hisses of all the midshipmen, in which I most cordially joined. + +After so clear a proof of the advantages of the science of +self-defence, I determined to acquire it; and, with the young stranger +for my tutor, I soon became a proficient in the art of boxing, and +able to cope with Murphy and his supporters. + +There was a part of my duty which, I am free to confess, I hated: this +was keeping watch at night. I loved sleep, and, after ten o'clock, I +could not keep my eyes open. Neither the buckets of water which were +so liberally poured over me by the midshipmen, under the facetious +appellation of "blowing the grampus," nor any expostulation or +punishments inflicted on me by the first lieutenant could rouse my +_dormant_ energies after the first half of the watch was expired. I +was one of the most determined votaries of Somnus; and for his sake, +endured every sort of persecution. The first lieutenant took me into +his watch, and tried every means, both of mildness and coercion, to +break me of this evil habit. I was sure, however, to escape from him, +and to conceal myself in some hole or corner, where I slept out the +remainder of the watch; and the next morning, I was, as regularly, +mast-headed, to do penance during the greater part of the day for +my deeds of darkness. I believe that of the first two years of my +servitude, one-half of my waking hours, at least, were passed aloft. + +I took care, however, to provide myself with books, and, on the whole, +was perhaps better employed than I should have been in my berth below. +Handstone, though a martinet, was a gentleman; and as he felt a great +interest in the young officers in the ship, so he took much pains in +the instruction and improvement of them. He frequently expostulated +with me on the great impropriety of my conduct; my answer invariably +was, that I was as sensible of it as he could be, but that I could +not help it; that I deserved all the punishment I met with, and threw +myself entirely on his mercy. He used frequently to call me over to +the weather side of the deck, when he would converse with me on any +topic which he thought might interest or amuse me. Finding I was +tolerably well read in history, he asked my opinion, and gave me his +own with great good sense and judgment; but such was the irresistible +weight of my eyelids, that I used, when he was in the midst of a long +dissertation, to slip down the gangway-ladder and leave him to finish +his discourses to the wind. + +Now, when this occurred, I was more severely punished than on any +other occasion; for, to the neglect of duty, I added contempt both of +his rank and the instruction he was offering to me. His wrath was also +considerably increased when he only discovered my departure by the +tittering of the other midshipmen and the quarter-master at the conn. + +One evening, I completed my disgrace with him, though a great deal +might be said in my own favour. He had sent me to the fore-topmast +head, at seven o'clock in the morning, and very unfeelingly, or +forgetfully, kept me there the whole day. When he went off deck to his +dinner, I came down into the top, made a bed for myself in one of the +top-gallant studding sails, and, desiring the man who had the look-out +to call me before the lieutenant was likely to come on deck, I very +quietly began to prepare a sacrifice to my favourite deity, Somnus; +but as the look-out man did not see the lieutenant come up, I was +caught napping just at dusk, when the lieutenant came on deck, and +did me the honour to remember where he had left me. Looking at the +fore-topmast head, he called me down. + +Like Milton's devils, who were "found sleeping by one they dread," +up I sprung, and regained my perch by the topsail-tie, supposing, +or rather hoping, that he would not see me before the mast, in the +obscurity of the evening; but he was too lynx-eyed, and had not +presence of mind enough _not_ to see what he should not have seen. He +called to the three men in the top, and inquired where I was? They +replied at the mast-head. "What!" exclaimed Handstone, with an oath; +"did I not see him this moment, go up by the topsail-tie?" + +"No, sir," said the men; "he is now asleep at the mast-head." + +"Come down here, you lying rascals, every one of you," said the +lieutenant, "and I'll teach you to speak the truth!" + +I, who had by this time quietly resumed my station, was ordered down +along with them; and we all four stood on the quarter-deck, while the +following interrogations were put to us:-- + +"Now, sir," said the first lieutenant to the captain of the top, "how +dare you tell me that that young gentleman was at the mast-head, when +I myself saw him 'shinning' up by the topsail-tie?" + +I was sorry for the men, who, to save me, had got themselves into +jeopardy; and I was just going to declare the truth, and take the +whole odium upon myself, when, to my utter astonishment, the man +boldly answered, "He _was_ at the mast-head, sir, upon my honour." + +"Your honour!" cried the lieutenant, with contempt; then, turning to +the other men, he put the same question to them both in succession, +and received the same positive answers; so that I really began to +think I had been at the mast-head all the time, and had been dreaming +I was in the top. At last, turning to me, he said, "Now, sir, I ask +you, on your honour, as an officer and a gentleman, where were you +when I first hailed?" + +"At the mast-head, sir," said I. + +"Be it so," he replied; "as you are an officer and a gentleman, I am +bound to believe you." Then turning on his heels, he walked away in a +greater rage than I ever remember to have seen him. + +I plainly perceived that I was not believed, and that I had lost his +good opinion. Yet, to consider the case fairly and impartially, how +could I have acted otherwise? I had been much too long confined to the +mast-head--as long as a man might take to go from London to Bath in a +stagecoach; I had lost all my meals; and these poor fellows, to save +me from further punishment, had voluntarily exposed themselves to +a flogging at the gangway by telling a barefaced falsehood in my +defence. Had I not supported them, they would certainly have been +flogged, and I should have lost myself with every person aboard; I +therefore came to that paradoxical conclusion on the spot, namely, +that, as a man of honour and a gentleman, I was bound to tell a lie in +order to save these poor men from a cruel punishment. + +I am sensible that this is a case to lay before the bench of bishops; +and though I never pretended to the constancy of a martyr, had the +consequences been on myself alone, I should have had no hesitation in +speaking the truth. The lieutenant was to blame, first, by too great +a severity; and, secondly, by too rigid an inquiry into a subject not +worth the trouble. Still my conscience smote me that I had done wrong; +and when the rage of the lieutenant had abated, so as to insure the +impunity of the men, I took the earliest opportunity of explaining to +him the motives for my conduct, and the painful situation in which I +stood. He received my excuses coldly, and we never were friends again. + +Our captain, who was a dashing sort of a fellow, contrived to brush +up the enemy's quarters, on the coast of France. On one of our boat +expeditions, I contrived to slip away with the rest; we landed, and +surprised a battery, which we blew up, and spiked the guns. The French +soldiers ran for their lives, and we plundered the huts of some poor +fishermen. I went in with the rest, in hopes of finding plunder, and +for my deserts caught a Tartar. A large skait lay with its mouth open, +into which I thrust my fore-finger, to drag him away; the animal was +not dead, and closing his jaws, divided my finger to the bone--this +was the only blood spilt on the occasion. + +Though guilty myself, I was sorry to see the love of plunder prevail +so extensively among us. The sailors took away articles utterly +useless to them, and, after carrying them a certain distance, threw +them down for others equally useless. I have since often reflected how +justly I was punished for my fault, and how needlessly we inflicted +the horrors of war on those inoffensive and unhappy creatures. + +Our next attempt was of a more serious nature, and productive of still +greater calamity to the unoffending and industrious, the usual victims +of war, while the instigators are reposing in safety on their down +beds. + + + + +Chapter V + + My life is spanned already; + + * * * * * + + Go with me, like good angels, to my end. + + "Henry VIII." + + Danger, like an ague, subtly taints + Even then when we sit idly in the sun. + + "Troilus and Cressida." + + +I had never been able to regain the confidence and esteem of the first +lieutenant since the unfortunate affair of the mast-head. He was +certainly an excellent and a correct officer, too much so to overlook +what he considered a breach of honour. I, therefore, easily reconciled +myself to a separation, which occurred very soon after. We chased a +ship into the Bay of Arcasson, when, as was customary, she sought +safety under a battery; and the captain, according to our custom, +resolved to cut her out. + +For this purpose, the boats were manned and armed, and every +preparation made for the attack on the following morning. The command +of the expedition was given to the first lieutenant, who accepted of +it with cheerfulness, and retired to his bed in high spirits, with the +anticipation of the honour and profit which the dawn of day would heap +upon him. He was proverbially brave and cool in action, so that the +seamen followed him with confidence as to certain victory. Whether any +ill-omened dreams had disturbed his rest, or whether any reflections +on the difficult and dangerous nature of the service had alarmed him, +I could not tell; but in the morning we all observed a remarkable +change in his deportment. His ardour was gone; he walked the deck with +a slow and measured pace, apparently in deep thought; and, contrary +to his usual manner, was silent and melancholy, abstracted, and +inattentive to the duties of the ship. + +The boats prepared for the service were manned; the officers had taken +their seats in them; the oars were tossed up; the eyes of the young +warriors beamed with animation, and we waited for Mr Handstone, who +still walked the deck, absorbed in his own reflections. He was at +length recalled to a sense of his situation by the captain, who, in a +tone of voice more than usually loud, asked him if he intended to take +the command of the expedition? He replied, "most certainly;" and with +a firm and animated step, crossed the quarter-deck, and went into his +boat. + +I, following, seated myself by his side; he looked at me with a +foreboding indifference; had he been in his usual mood, he would have +sent me to some other boat. We had a long pull before we reached the +object of our intended attack, which we found moored close in shore, +and well prepared for us. A broadside of grape-shot was the first +salute we received. It produced the same effect on our men as the spur +to a fiery steed. We pulled alongside, and began to scramble up in the +best manner we could. Handstone in an instant regained all his wonted +animation, cheered his men, and with his drawn sword in his hand, +mounted the ship's side, while our men at the same time poured in +volleys of musketry, and then followed their intrepid leader. + +In our boat, the first alongside, eleven men, out of twenty-four, lay +killed or disabled. Disregarding these, the lieutenant sprang up. I +followed close to him; he leaped from the bulwark in upon her deck, +and, before I could lift my cutlass in his defence, fell back upon me, +knocked me down in his fall, and expired in a moment. He had thirteen +musket-balls in his chest and stomach. + +I had no time to disengage myself before I was trampled on, and nearly +suffocated by the pressure of my shipmates, who, burning to gain +the prize, or to avenge our fall, rushed on with the most undaunted +bravery. I was supposed to be dead, and treated accordingly, my poor +body being only used as a stop for the gangway, where the ladder +was unshipped. There I lay fainting with the pressure, and nearly +suffocated with the blood of my brave leader, on whose breast my face +rested, with my hands crossed over the back of my head, to save my +skull, if possible, from the heels of my friends, and the swords of +my enemies; and while reason held her seat, I could not help thinking +that I was just as well where I was, and that a change of position +might not be for the better. + +About eight minutes decided the affair, though it certainly did seem +to me, in my then unpleasant situation, much longer. Before it was +over I had fainted, and before I regained my senses the vessel was +under weigh, and out of gunshot from the batteries. + +The first moments of respite from carnage were employed in examining +the bodies of the killed and wounded. I was numbered among the former, +and stretched out between the guns by the side of the first lieutenant +and the other dead bodies. A fresh breeze blowing through the ports +revived me a little, but, faint and sick, I had neither the power nor +inclination to move; my brain was confused; I had no recollection of +what had happened, and continued to lie in a sort of stupor, until the +prize came alongside of the frigate, and I was roused by the cheers of +congratulation and victory from those who had remained on board. + +A boat instantly brought the surgeon and his assistants to inspect the +dead and assist the living. Murphy came along with them. He had not +been of the boarding party; and seeing my supposed lifeless corpse, he +gave it a slight kick, saying, at the same time, "Here is a young cock +that has done crowing! Well, for a wonder, this chap has cheated the +gallows." + +The sound of the fellow's detested voice was enough to recall me from +the grave, if my orders had been signed: I faintly exclaimed, "You are +a liar!" which, even with all the melancholy scene around us, produced +a burst of laughter at his expense. I was removed to the ship, put +to bed, and bled, and was soon able to narrate the particulars of my +adventure; but I continued a long while dangerously ill. + +The soliloquy of Murphy over my supposed dead body, and my laconic +reply, were the cause of much merriment in the ship: the midshipmen +annoyed him by asserting that he had saved my life, as nothing but his +hated voice could have awoke me from my sleep of death. + +The fate of the first lieutenant was justly deplored by all of us; +though I cannot deny my Christian-like acquiescence in the will +of Providence in this, as well as on a former occasion, when the +witnesses of my weakness had been removed for ever out of my way. As +I saw it was impossible to regain his good opinion, I thought it +was quite as well that we should part company. That he had a strong +presentiment of his death was proved; and though I had often heard +these instances asserted, I never before had it so clearly brought +home to my senses. + +The prize was called _L'Aimable Julie_, laden with coffee, cotton, and +indigo; mounted fourteen guns; had, at the commencement of the action, +forty-seven men, of whom eight were killed, and sixteen wounded. The +period of our return into port, according to our orders, happened to +coincide with this piece of good fortune, and we came up to Spithead, +where our captain met with a hearty welcome from the admiral. + +Having delivered his "butcher's bill," i.e. the list of killed and +wounded, together with an account of our defects, they were sent up to +the Admiralty; and, by return of post, we were ordered to fit foreign: +and although no one on board, not even the captain, was supposed to +know our destination, the girls on the Point assured us it was the +Mediterranean; and this turned out to be the fact. + +A few days only were spent in hurried preparation, during which I +continued to write to my father and mother. In return I received all I +required, which was a remittance in cash. This I duly acknowledged +by a few lines as the ship was unmooring. We sailed, and soon after +arrived without accident at Gibraltar, where we found general orders +for any ship that might arrive from England to proceed and join +the admiral at Malta. In a few hours our provisions and water were +complete; but we were not in so much haste to arrive at Malta as we +were to quit Gibraltar--hugging the Spanish coast, in hopes of picking +up something to insure us as hearty a welcome at Valette as we found +on our last return to Portsmouth. + +Early on the second morning of our departure we made Cape de Gaete. As +the day dawned we discovered four sail in the wind's eye, and close in +shore. The wind was light, and all sail was made in chase. We gained +very little on them for many hours, and towards evening it fell calm. +The boats were then ordered to pursue them, and we set off, diverging +a little from each other's course, or, as the French would say, +_déployée_, to give a better chance of falling in with them. I was in +the gig with the master, and, that being the best running boat, we +soon came up with one of the feluccas. We fired musketry at her: but +having a light breeze, she would not bring-to. We then took good aim +at the helmsman, and hit him. The man only shifted the helm from his +right hand to his left, and kept on his course. We still kept firing +at this intrepid fellow, and I felt it was like wilful murder, since +he made no resistance, but steadily endeavoured to escape. + +At length we got close under the stern, and hooked on with our +boat-hook. This the Spaniards unhooked, and we dropped astern, having +laid our oars in; but the breeze dying entirely away, we again pulled +up alongside, and took possession. The poor man was still at the helm, +bleeding profusely. We offered him every assistance, and asked why he +did not surrender sooner. He replied that he was an old Castilian. +Whether he meant that an earlier surrender would have disgraced him, +or that he contemplated, from his former experience, a chance of +escape to the last moment, I cannot tell. Certain it is that no +one ever behaved better; and I felt that I would have given all +I possessed to have healed the wounds of this patient, meek, and +undaunted old man, who uttered no complaint, but submitted to his fate +with a magnanimity which would have done credit to Socrates himself. +He had received four musket-balls in his body, and, of course, +survived his capture but a very few hours. + +We found to our surprise that this vessel, with the three others, one +of which was taken by another of our boats, were from Lima. They were +single-masted, about thirty tons burthen, twelve men each, and were +laden with copper, hides, wax, and cochineal, and had been out five +months. They were bound to Valentia, from which they were only one +day's sail when we intercepted them. Such is the fortune of war! This +gallant man, after a voyage of incredible labour and difficulty, would +in a few hours have embraced his family, and gladdened their hearts +with the produce of honest industry and successful enterprise; when, +in a moment, all their hopes were blasted by our legal murder and +robbery; and our prize-money came to our pockets with the tears, if +not the curses, of the widow and the orphan! + +From some information which the captain obtained in the prize, he was +induced to stand over towards the Balearic Islands. We made Ivica, and +stood past it; then ran for Palma Bay in the island of Majorca; here +we found nothing, to our great disappointment, and continued our +course round the island. + +An event occurred here, so singular as scarcely to be credible; but +the fact is well attested, as there were others who witnessed it +beside myself. The water was smooth, and the day remarkably fine; we +were distant from the shore more than a mile and a quarter, when the +captain, wishing to try the range of the main-deck guns, which were +long eighteen-pounders, ordered the gunner to elevate one of them and +fire it towards the land. The gunner asked whether he should point the +gun at any object. A man was seen walking on the white sandy beach, +and as there did not appear to be the slightest chance of hitting him, +for he only looked like a speck, the captain desired the gunner to +fire at him; he did so, and the man fell. A herd of bullocks at this +moment was seen coming out of the woods, and the boats were sent with +a party to shoot some of them for the ship's company. + +When we landed we found that the ball had cut the poor man in two; and +what made the circumstance more particularly interesting was, that he +was evidently a man of consequence. He was well dressed, had on black +breeches and silk stockings; he was reading Ovid's Metamorphoses, and +still grasped the book, which I took out of his hand. + +We have often heard of the miraculous powers ascribed to a chance +shot, but never could we have supposed that this devilish ball could +have gone so far, or done so much mischief. We buried the remains of +the unfortunate gentleman in the sand; and having selected two or +three bullocks out of the herd, shot them, skinned and divided them +into quarters, loaded our boat, and returned on board. I had taken +the book out of the hand of the deceased, and from his neck a small +miniature of a beautiful female. The brooch in his shirt I also +brought away; and when I gave an account to the captain of what had +happened, I offered him these articles. He returned them all to me, +desired me to keep them until I could see any of the friends of the +deceased, and appeared so much distressed at the accident, that we +never mentioned it afterwards; and in the course of the time we +were together, it was nearly forgotten. The articles remained in my +possession unnoticed for many years. + +Two days after, we fell in with a vessel of suspicious appearance; and +it being calm, the boats were sent in chase. They found her, on their +approach, to be a xebeque under French colours; but these they very +soon hauled down, and showed no others. As we came within hail they +told us to keep off, and that if we attempted to board they should +fire into us. This was not a threat likely to deter a British officer, +and particularly such fire-eaters as ours. So to it we went, and a +desperate struggle ensued, the numbers being nearly equal on both +sides; but they had the advantage of their own deck and bulwarks. We +got on board, however, and in a few minutes gained possession, with +a loss, on our side, of sixteen; and on that of our opponent's of +twenty-six, killed and wounded. + +But great was our sorrow and disappointment when we discovered that +we had shed the blood of our friends, while we had lost our own. The +vessel, it appeared, was a Gibraltar privateer; they took us for +French, our boats being fitted with thoels and grummets for the oars, +in the French fashion; and we supposed them to be French from their +colours and the language in which they hailed us. In this affair we +had three officers killed or wounded, and some of our best men. The +privateer was manned by a mixed crew of all nations, but chiefly +Greeks; and although ostensibly with a commission signed by the +Governor of Gibraltar, were no doubt little scrupulous as to the +colours of any vessel they might encounter, provided she was not too +strong for them. + +After this unfortunate mistake we proceeded to Malta: the captain +expecting a severe rebuke from his admiral, for his rashness in +sending away his boats to attack a vessel without knowing her force. +Fortunately for him, the admiral was not there; and before we met him, +the number of prizes we had taken were found sufficient in his eyes to +cover our multitude of sins, so the affair blew over. + +While we lay in Malta Harbour, my friend Murphy fell overboard one +night, just after all the boats were hoisted in; he could not swim, +and would have been drowned if I had not jumped overboard and held him +up until a boat was lowered down to our assistance. The officers and +ship's company gave me more credit for this action than I really +deserved. To have saved any person under such circumstances, they +said, was a noble deed; but to risk my life for a man who had always, +from my first coming into the ship, been my bitterest enemy, was more +than they could have expected, and was undoubtedly the noblest revenge +that I could have taken. But they were deceived--they knew me not: +it was my vanity, and the desire of oppressing my enemy under an +intolerable weight of obligation, that induced me to rush to his +rescue; moreover, as I stood on the gangway witnessing his struggles +for life, I felt that I was about to lose all the revenge I had so +long laid up in store; in short, I could not spare him, and only saved +him, as a cat does a mouse, to torment him. + +Murphy acknowledged his obligations, and said the terrors of death +were upon him; but in a few days forgot all I had done for him, +consummated his own disgrace, and raised my character on the ruins of +his own. On some frivolous occasion he threw a basin of dirty water +in my face as I passed through the steerage; this was too good an +opportunity to gratify my darling passion. I had long watched for +an occasion to quarrel with him; but as he had been ill during our +passage from Gibraltar to Malta, I could not justify any act of +aggression. He had now recovered, and was in the plentitude of his +strength, and I astonished him by striking the first blow. + +A set-to followed; I brought up all my scientific powers in aid of my +strength and the memory of former injuries. I must do him the justice +to say he never showed more game--but he had everything to contend +for; if I was beaten I was only where I was before, but with him the +case would have been different. A fallen tyrant has no friends. Stung +to madness by the successful hits I planted in his face, he lost his +temper, while I was cool; he fought wildly, I stopped all his blows, +and paid them with interest. He stood forty-three rounds, and then +gave in with his eyes bunged up, and his face so swollen and so +covered with blood, as not to be known by his friends if he had had +any. + +I had hardly a mark; most of our midshipmen were absent in prizes; but +the two seniors of our berth, an old master's mate past promotion, and +the surgeon's assistant, who had held my wrist when I was cobbed, +were present as the supporters of Murphy during the combat. I always +determined whenever I gained a battle to follow it up. The shouts of +victory resounded in the berth--the youngsters joined with me in songs +of triumph, and gave great offence to the trio. The young Esculapius, +a white-faced, stupid, pock-marked, unhealthy-looking man, was fool +enough to say, that although I had beaten Murphy, I was not to suppose +myself master of the berth. I replied to this only by throwing a +biscuit at his head, as a shot of defiance; and, darting on him before +he could get his legs from under the table, I thrust my fingers into +his neckcloth, which I twisted so tightly, that I held him till he +was nearly choked, giving his head at the same time two or three good +thumps against the ship's side. + +Finding that he grew black in the face, I let him go, and asked if +he required any further satisfaction, to which he replied in the +negative, and from that day he was always dutiful and obedient to me. +The old superannuated mate, a sturdy merchant seaman, seemed greatly +dismayed at the successive defeats of his allies, and I believe would +have gladly concluded a separate peace. He had never offered to come +to the assistance of the doctor, although appealed to in the most +pitiable gestures. + +This I observed with secret pleasure, and would the more willingly +have given him a brush, as I saw he was disinclined to make the +attempt. I was, however, determined to be at the head of the mess. At +twelve o'clock that night I was relieved from the first watch, and +coming down, I found the old mate in a state of beastly intoxication. +Thus he went to his hammock, and fell asleep. While he lay "dormant," +I took a piece of lunar caustic, which I wetted, and drew stripes +and figures all over his weather-beaten face, increasing his natural +ugliness to a frightful degree, and made him look very like a New +Zealand warrior. The next morning, when he was making his toilet, my +party were all ready prepared for the _éclaircissement_. He opened +his little dirty chest, and having strapped an old razor, and made a +lather in a wooden soap-box, which bore evident marks of the antique, +he placed a triangular piece of a looking-glass against the reclining +lid of the chest, and began the operation of shaving. His start back +with horror, when he beheld his face, I shall never forget: it outdid +the young Roscius, when he saw the ghost of Hamlet. Having wetted his +fore-finger with his tongue, the old mate tried to remove the stain of +the caustic, but the "d----dpot" still remained, and we, like so many +young imps, surrounded him, roaring with laughter. + +I boldly told him that he bore my marks as well as Murphy and the +doctor; and I added, with a degree of cruel mockery which might have +been spared, that I thought it right to put all my servants in black +to-day. I asked whether he was contented with the arrangement, or +whether he chose to appeal against my decree; he signified that he had +no more to say. + +Thus, in twenty-four hours, I had subdued the great allies who had so +long oppressed me. I immediately effected a revolution; dismissed the +doctor from the office of caterer--took the charge on myself, and +administered the most impartial justice. I made the oldsters pay their +mess which they had not correctly done before; I caused an equal +distribution of all luxuries from which the juniors had till then been +debarred; and I flatter myself I restored, in some degree, the golden +age in the cockpit. There were no more battles, for there was no hope +of victory on their part, nor anything to contend for on mine. I +never took any advantage of my strength, further than to protect the +youngsters. I proved by this that I was not quarrelsome, but had only +struggled for my own emancipation--that gained, I was satisfied. My +conduct was explained to the captain and the officers; and being fully +and fairly discussed, did me great service. I was looked upon with +respect, and treated with marks of confidence, not usual towards a +person so young. + +We left Malta, expecting to find our commander-in-chief off Toulon; +but it seldom happens that the captain of a frigate is in any hurry to +join his admiral, unless charged with despatches of importance. This +not being our case, we somehow or other tumbled down the Mediterranean +before a strong Levanter, and then had to work back again along the +coast of Spain and France. It is an ill wind, they say, that blows +nobody good; and we found it so with us; for off Toulon, in company +with the fleet, if we did take prizes they became of little value, +because there were so many to share them. Our captain, who was a man +of the most consummate _ruse de guerre_ I ever saw or heard of, had +two reasons for sending his prizes to Gibraltar. The first was, that +we should, in all probability, be sent down there to receive our men, +and have the advantage of the cruise back; the second, that he was +well aware of the corrupt practices of the admiralty-court at Malta. + +All the vessels, therefore, which we had hitherto captured, were sent +to Gibraltar for adjudication, and we now added to their number. We +had the good fortune to take a large ship laden with barilla, and a +brig with tobacco and wine. The charge of the last I was honoured +with: and no prime minister ever held a situation of such heavy +responsibility with such corrupt supporters. So much was the crew of +the frigate reduced by former captures and the unlucky affair with the +Maltese privateer, that I was only allowed three men. I was, however, +so delighted with my first command, that, I verily believe, if they +had only given me a dog and a pig I should have been satisfied. + +The frigate's boat put us on board. It blew fresh from the eastward, +and I instantly put the helm up, and shaped my course for the old +rock. The breeze soon freshened into a gale; we ran slap before it, +but soon found it necessary to take in the top-gallant sails. This we +at last accomplished, one at a time. We then thought a reef or two in +the topsails would be acceptable; but that was impossible. We tried +a Spanish reef, that is, let the yards come down on the cap: and +she flew before the gale, which had now increased to a very serious +degree. Our cargo of wine and tobacco was, unfortunately, stowed by a +Spanish and not a British owner. The difference was very material to +me. An Englishman, knowing the vice of his countrymen, would have +placed the wine underneath, and the tobacco above. Unfortunately +it was, in this instance, the reverse, and my men very soon helped +themselves to as much as rendered them nearly useless to me, being +more than half seas over. + +We got on pretty well, however, till about two o'clock in the morning, +when the man at the helm, unable to wake the other two seamen to fetch +him a drop, thought he might trust the brig to steer herself for a +minute, while he quenched his thirst at the wine-cask: the vessel +instantly broached to, that is, came with her broadside to the wind +and sea, and away went the mainmast by the board. Fortunately, the +foremast stood. The man who had just quitted the helm had not time to +get drunk, and the other two were so much frightened that they got +sober. + +We cleared the wreck as well as we could, got her before the wind +again, and continued on our course. But a British sailor, the most +daring of all men, is likewise the most regardless of warning or of +consequences. The loss of the mainmast, instead of showing my men the +madness of their indulgence in drink, turned the scale the opposite +way. If they could get drunk with two masts, how much more could they +do so with one, when they had only half as much sail to look after? +With such a rule of three, there was no reasoning; and they got drunk, +and continued drunk during the whole passage. + +Good luck often attends us when we don't deserve it: + + "The sweet little cherub that sits up aloft," + +as Dibdin says, had an eye upon us. I knew we could not easily get out +of the Gut of Gibraltar without knowing it; and accordingly, on the +third day after leaving the frigate, we made the rock early in the +morning, and, by two o'clock, rounded Europa Point. I had ordered the +men to bend the cable, and, like many other young officers, fancied it +was done because they said it was, and because I had ordered it. +It never once occurred to me to go and see if my orders had been +executed; indeed, to say the truth, I had quite as much as I could +turn my hand to: I was at the helm from twelve o'clock at night till +six in the morning, looking out for the land; and when I ordered one +of the men to relieve me, I directed him how to steer, and fell into +a profound sleep, which lasted till ten o'clock; after which I was +forced to exert the whole of my ingenuity in order to fetch into the +Bay, and prevent being blown through the Gut; so that the bending of +the cable escaped my memory until the moment I required the use of the +anchor. + +As I passed under the stern of one of the ships of war in the Bay, +with my prize colours flying, the officer on deck hailed me, and said +I "had better shorten sail." I thought so too, but how was this to be +done? My whole ship's company were too drunk to do it, and though I +begged for some assistance from his Majesty's ship, it blew so fresh, +and we passed so quick, that they could not hear me, or were not +inclined. Necessity has no law. I saw among the other ships in the bay +a great lump of a transport, and I thought she was much better able to +bear the concussion I intended for her than any other vessel; because +I had heard then, and have been made sure of it since, that her owners +(like all other owners) were cheating the government out of thousands +of pounds a year. She was lying exactly in the part of the Bay +assigned for the prizes; and as I saw no other possible mode of +"bringing the ship to anchor," I steered for "the lobster smack," and +ran slap on board of her, to the great astonishment of the master, +mate, and crew. + +The usual expletives, a volley of oaths and curses on our lubberly +heads, followed the shock. This I expected, and was as fully prepared +for as I was for the fall of my foremast, which, taking the foreyard +of the transport, fell over the starboard quarter and greatly relieved +me on the subject of shortening sail. Thus, my pretty brig was first +reduced to a sloop and then to a hulk; fortunately, her bottom was +sound. I was soon cut clear of the transport, and called out in a +manly voice, "Let go the anchor." + +This order was obeyed with promptitude: away it went sure enough; but +the devil a cable was there bent to it, and my men being all stupidly +drunk, I let my vessel drift athwart-hawse of a frigate; the +commanding officer of which, seeing I had no other cable bent, very +kindly sent a few hands on board to assist me; and by five o'clock I +was safely moored in the Bay of Gibraltar, and walked my quarter-deck +as high in my own estimation as Columbus, when he made the American +islands. + +But short, short was my power! My frigate arrived the next morning. +The captain sent for me, and I gave him an account of my voyage and my +disasters; he very kindly consoled me for my misfortune; and so far +from being angry with me for losing my masts, said it was wonderful, +under all circumstances, how I had succeeded in saving the vessel. We +lay only a fortnight at Gibraltar, when news arrived that the French +had entered Spain, and very shortly after orders came from England to +suspend all hostilities against the Spaniards. This we thought a bore, +as it almost annihilated any chance of prize-money; at the same time +that it increased our labours and stimulated our activity in a most +surprising manner, and opened scenes to us far more interesting than +if the war with Spain had continued. + +We were ordered up to join the admiral off Toulon, but desired to look +into the Spanish port of Carthagena on our way, and to report the +state of the Spanish squadron in that arsenal. We were received with +great politeness by the governor and the officers of the Spanish fleet +lying there. These people we found were men of talent and education; +their ships were mostly dismantled, and they had not the means of +equipping them. + + + + +Chapter VI + + _Par_. You give me most egregious indignity. + _Laf_. Ay, with all my heart; and thou art worthy of it. + + "_All's Well that Ends Well_." + + +Naturally anxious to behold a country from which we had hitherto been +excluded for so many years, we all applied for leave to go on shore, +and obtained it. Even the seamen were allowed the same indulgence, and +went in parties of twenty and thirty at a time. We were followed and +gaped at by the people; but shunned at the same time as "hereticos." +The inns of the town, like all the rest of them in Spain, have not +improved since the days of the immortal Santillana--they were all more +or less filled with the lowest of the rabble, and a set of bravos, +whose calling was robbery, and who cared little if murder were its +accompaniment. The cookery was execrable. Garlic and oil were its +principal ingredients. The olla podrida, and its constant attendant, +the tomato sauce, were intolerable, but the wine was very well for +a midshipman. Whenever we had a repast in any of these houses, the +bravos endeavoured to pick a quarrel with us; and these fellows being +always armed with stilettos, we found it necessary to be equally well +prepared; and whenever we seated ourselves at a table, we never failed +to display the butts of our pistols, which kept them in decent order, +for they are as cowardly as they are thievish. Our seamen, not being +so cautious or so well provided with arms, were frequently robbed and +assassinated by these rascals. + +I was, on one occasion, near falling a victim to them. Walking in the +evening with the second master, and having a pretty little Spanish +girl under my arm, for, to my shame be it spoken, I had already formed +an acquaintance with the frail sisterhood, four of these villains +accosted us. We soon perceived, by their manner of holding their +cloaks, that they had their stilettos ready. I desired my companion to +draw his dirk, to keep close to me, and not to let them get between us +and the wall. Seeing that we were prepared, they wished us "_buenos +noches_" (good night); and, endeavouring to put us off our guard by +entering into conversation, asked us to give them a cigar, which my +companion would have done, had I not cautioned him not to quit his +dirk with his right hand, for this was all they wanted. + +In this defensive posture we continued until we had nearly reached the +plaza or great square, where many people were walking and enjoying +themselves by moonlight, the usual custom of the country. "Now," said +I to my friend, "let us make a start from these fellows. When I run, +do you follow me, and don't stop till we are in the middle of the +square." + +The manoeuvre was successful; we out-ran the thieves, who were not +aware of our plan, and were encumbered with their heavy cloaks. +Finding we had escaped, they turned upon the girl, and robbed her of +her miserable earnings. This we saw, but could not prevent; such was +the police of Spain then, nor has it improved since. + +This was the last time I ventured on shore at night, except to go once +with a party of our officers to the house of the Spanish admiral, who +had a very pretty niece, and was _liberale_ enough not to frown on +us poor heretics. She was indeed a pretty creature: her lovely black +eyes, long eyelashes, and raven hair, betrayed a symptom of Moorish +blood, at the same time that her ancient family-name and high +good-breeding gave her the envied appellation of _Vieja Christiana_. + +This fair creature was pleased to bestow a furtive glance of +approbation on my youthful form and handsome dress. My vanity was +tickled. I spoke French to her: she understood it imperfectly, and +pretended to know still less of it, from the hatred borne by all the +Spaniards at that time to the French nation. + +We improved our time, however, which was but short; and, before +we parted, perfectly understood each other. I thought I could be +contented to give up everything, and reside with her in the wilds of +Spain. + +The time of our departure came, and I was torn away from my Rosaritta, +not without the suspicions of my captain and shipmates that I had +been a too highly favoured youth. This was not true. I loved the dear +angel, but never had wronged her; and I went to sea in a mood which I +sometimes thought might end in an act of desperation: but salt water +is an admirable specific against love, at least against such love as +that was. + +We joined the admiral off Toulon, and were ordered by him to cruise +between Perpignan and Marseilles. We parted from the fleet on the +following day, and kept the coast in a continued state of alarm. Not +a vessel dared to show her nose out of port: we had her if she did. +Batteries we laughed at, and either silenced them with our long +eighteen-pounders, or landed and blew them up. + +In one of these little skirmishes I had very nearly been taken, and +should, in that case, have missed all the honour, and glory, and +hairbreadth escapes which will be found related in the following +pages. I should either have been sabred in mere retaliation, or +marched off to Verdun for the remaining six years of the war. + +We had landed to storm and blow up a battery, for which purpose we +carried with us a bag of powder, and a train of canvas. Everything +went on prosperously. We came to a canal which it was necessary to +cross, and the best swimmers were selected to convey the powder +over without wetting it. I was one of them. I took off my shoes and +stockings to save them; and, after we had taken the battery, I was so +intent on looking for the telegraphic signal-box, that I had quite +forgotten the intended explosion, until I heard a cry of "Run, run!" +from those outside who had lighted the train. + +I was at that moment on the wall of the fort, nearly thirty feet high, +but sloping. I jumped one part, and scrambled the other, and ran away +as fast as I could, amidst a shower of stones, which fell around me +like an eruption of Vesuvius. Luckily I was not hit, but I had cut my +foot in the leap, and was in much pain. I had two fields of stubble +to pass, and my shoes and stockings were on the other side of the +canal--the sharp straw entered the wound, and almost drove me mad, and +I was tempted to sit down and resign myself to my fate. + +However, I persevered, and had nearly reached the boats which were +putting off, not aware of my absence, when a noise like distant +thunder reached my ears. This I soon found was cavalry from Cotte, +which had come to defend the battery. I mustered all my strength, and +plunged into the sea to swim off to the boats, and so little time had +I to spare, that some of the enemy's chasseurs, on their black horses, +swam in after me, and fired their pistols at my head. The boats were +at this time nearly a quarter of a mile from the shore; the officers +in them fortunately perceived the cavalry, and saw me at the same +time: a boat laid on her oars, which with great difficulty I reached, +and was taken in; but so exhausted with pain and loss of blood, that I +was carried on board almost dead; my foot was cut to the bone, and I +continued a month under the surgeon's care. + +I had nearly recovered from this accident, when we captured a ship, +with which Murphy was sent as prize-master; and the same evening a +schooner, which we cut out from her anchorage. The command of this +latter vessel was given to me--it was late in the evening, and the +hurry was so great that the keg of spirits intended for myself and +crew was not put on board. This was going from one extreme to the +other; in my last ship we had too much liquor, and in this too little. +Naturally thirsty, our desire for drink needed not the stimulus of +salt fish and calavances, for such was our cargo and such was our +food, and deeply did we deplore the loss of our spirits. + +On the third day after leaving the frigate, on our way to Gibraltar, I +fell in with a ship on the coast of Spain, and knew it to be the one +Murphy commanded, by a remarkable white patch in the main-topsail. I +made all sail in chase, in hopes of obtaining some spirits from him, +knowing that he had more than he could consume, even if he and his +people got drunk every day. When I came near him, he made all the sail +he could. At dusk I was near enough almost to hail him, but he stood +on; and I, having a couple of small three-pounders on board, with +some powder, fired one of them as a signal. This I repeated again and +again; but he would not bring to; and when it was dark, I lost sight +of him, and saw him no more until we met at Gibraltar. + +Next morning I fell in with three Spanish fishing-boats. They took me +for a French privateer, pulled up their lines, and made sail. I came +up with them, and, firing a gun, they hove to and surrendered. I +ordered them alongside; and, finding they had each a keg of wine on +board, I condemned that part of their cargo as contraband; but I +honestly offered payment for what I had taken. This they declined, +finding I was "_Ingles_," too happy to think they were not in the +hands of the French. I then gave each of them a pound of tobacco, +which not only satisfied them, but confirmed them in the +newly-received opinion among their countrymen, that England was +the bravest as well as the most generous of nations. They offered +everything their boat contained; but I declined all most nobly, +because I had obtained all I wanted; and we parted with mutual good +will, they shouting, "Viva Ingleterre!" and we drinking them a good +passage in their own wine. + +Many days elapsed before we reached Gibraltar: the winds were light, +and the weather fine; but as we had discovered that the fishing-boats +had wine, we took care to supply our cellar without any trouble from +the excise; and, from our equitable mode of barter, I had no reason to +think that his Majesty King George lost any of his deserved popularity +by our conduct. When we reached Gibraltar, I had still a couple of +good kegs wherewith to regale my messmates; though I was sorry to find +the frigate and the rest of her prizes had got in before us. Murphy, +indeed, did not arrive till the day after me. + +I was on the quarter-deck when he came in; and, to my astonishment, he +reported that he had been chased by a French privateer, and had beat +her off after a four hours' action--that his rigging had suffered a +good deal, but that he had not a man hurt. I let him run on till +the evening. Many believed him; but some doubted. At dinner, in the +gun-room, his arrogance knew no bounds; and, when half drunk, my three +men were magnified into a well-manned brig, as full of men and guns as +she could stuff! + +Sick of all this nonsense, I then simply related the story as it had +occurred, and sent for the quarter-master, who was with me, and who +confirmed all my statement. From that moment he was a mark of contempt +in the ship. Every lie was a Murphy, and every Murphy a liar. He dared +not resent this scorn of ours; and found himself so uncomfortable, +that he offered no objection to the removal proposed by the captain; +his character followed him, and he never obtained promotion. It is a +satisfaction to me to reflect that I not only had my full revenge on +this man, but that I had been the instrument of turning him out of an +honourable profession which he would have disgraced. + +This was no time for frigates to be idle; and if I chose to give the +name of mine and my captain, the naval history of the country would +prove that ours, of all other ships, was one of the most distinguished +in the cause of Spanish freedom. The south of Spain became the theatre +of the most cruel and desolating war. Our station was off Barcelona, +and thence to Perpignan, the frontier of France, on the borders of +Spain. Our duty (for which the enterprising disposition of our captain +was admirably calculated) was to support the guerilla chiefs; to cut +off the enemy's convoys of provisions, either by sea or along the +road which lay by the sea-shore; or to dislodge the enemy from any +stronghold he might be in possession of. + +I was absent from the ship on such services three and four weeks at a +time, being attached to a division of small-arm men under the command +of the third lieutenant. We suffered very much from privations of all +kinds. We never took with us more than one week's provision, and were +frequently three weeks without receiving any supply. In the article of +dress, our "catalogue of negatives," as a celebrated author says, "was +very copious;" we had no shoes nor stockings--no linen, and not all of +us had hats--a pocket-handkerchief was the common substitute for this +article; we clambered over rocks, and wandered through the flinty or +muddy ravines in company with our new allies, the hardy mountaineers. + +These men respected our valour, but did not like our religion or our +manners. They cheerfully divided their rations with us, but were +always inexorable in their cruelty to the French prisoners; and no +persuasion of ours could induce them to spare the lives of one of +these unhappy people, whose cries and entreaties to the English to +intercede for, or save them, were always unavailing. They were either +stabbed before our faces, or dragged to the top of a hill commanding a +view of some fortress occupied by the French, and, in sight of their +countrymen, their throats were cut from ear to ear. + +Should the Christian reader condemn this horrid barbarity, as he +certainly will, he must remember that those people were men whose +every feeling had been outraged. Rape, conflagration, murder, and +famine had everywhere followed the step of the cruel invaders; and +however we might lament their fate, and endeavour to avert it, we +could not but admit that the retaliation was not without justice. + +In this irregular warfare, we sometimes revelled in luxuries, and at +others were nearly starved. One day, in particular, when fainting with +hunger, we met a fat, rosy-looking capuchin: we begged him to show us +where we might procure some food, either by purchase or in any other +way; but he neither knew where to procure any, nor had he any money: +his order, he said, forbade him to use it. As he turned away from us, +in some precipitation, we thought we heard something rattle; and as +necessity has no law, we took the liberty of searching the padre, +on whose person we found forty dollars, of which we relieved him, +assuring him that our consciences were perfectly clear, since his +order forbade him to carry money; and that as he lived among good +Christians, they would not allow him to want. He cursed us; but we +laughed at him, because he had produced his own misfortune by his +falsehood and hypocrisy. + +This was the manner in which the Spanish priests generally behaved to +us; and in this way we generally repaid them when we could. We kept +the plunder--converted it into food--joined our party soon after, +and supposed the affair was over; but the friar had followed us at +a distance, and we perceived him coming up the hill where we were +stationed. To avoid discovery we exchanged clothes, in such a manner +as to render us no longer cognizable. The friar made his complaint to +the guerilla chief, whose eyes flashed fire at the indignant treatment +his priest had received; and it is probable that bloodshed would have +ensued had he been able to point out the culprits. + +I kept my countenance though I had changed my dress, and as he looked +at me with something beyond suspicion, I stared him full in the face, +with the whole united powers of my matchless impudence, and, in a loud +and menacing tone of voice, asked him in French if he took me for a +brigand. + +This question, as well as the manner in which it was put, silenced, +if it did not satisfy, the priest. He seemed to listen with apparent +conviction to the suggestion of some of our people, that he had been +robbed by another party, and he set out in pursuit of them. I was +quite tired of his importunities, and glad to see him depart. As he +turned away, he gave me a very scrutinizing look, which I returned +with another, full of well dissembled rage and scorn. My curling hair +had been well flattened down with a piece of soap, which I had in my +pocket, and I had much more the appearance of a Methodist parson than +a pickpocket. + +Some time previous to this, the frigate to which I belonged had been +ordered on other services; and as I had no opportunity of joining her, +I was placed, _pro tempore_, on board of another. + +But as this chapter has already spun out its length, I shall refer my +reader to the next for further particulars. + + + + +Chapter VII + + The shout + Of battle now began, and rushing sound + Of onset ... + 'Twixt host and host but narrow space was left. + + _Milton_. + + +From the deservedly high character borne by the captain of the frigate +which I was ordered to join, he was employed by Lord Collingwood +on the most confidential services; and we were sent to assist the +Spaniards in their defence of the important fortress of Rosas, in +Catalonia. It has already been observed that the French general, St +Cyr, had entered that country, and, having taken Figueras and Gerona, +was looking with a wistful eye on the castle of Trinity, on the +south-east side, the capture of which would be a certain prelude to +the fall of Rosas. + +My captain determined to defend it, although it had just been +abandoned by another British naval officer, as untenable. I +volunteered, though a supernumerary, to be one of the party, and was +sent: nor can I but acknowledge that the officer who had abandoned the +place had shown more than a sound discretion. Every part of the +castle was in ruins. Heaps of crumbling stones and rubbish, +broken gun-carriages, and split guns, presented to my mind a very +unfavourable field of battle. The only advantage we appeared to have +over the assailants was that the breach which they had effected in the +walls was steep in its ascent, and the loose stones either fell down +upon them, or gave way under their feet, while we plied them with +every kind of missile: this was our only defence, and all we had to +prevent the enemy marching into the works, if works they could be +called. + +There was another and very serious disadvantage attending our +locality. The castle was situated very near the summit of a steep +hill, the upper part of which was in possession of the enemy, who +were, by this means, nearly on a level with the top of the castle, +and, on that eminence, three hundred Swiss sharpshooters had effected +a lodgment, and thrown up works within fifty yards of us, keeping up +a constant fire at the castle. If a head was seen above the walls, +twenty rifle-bullets whizzed at it in a moment, and the same +unremitted attention was paid to our boats as they landed. + +On another hill, much to the northward, and consequently, further +inland, the French had erected a battery of six 24-pounders. This +agreeable neighbour was only three hundred yards from us; and, +allowing short intervals for the guns to cool, this battery kept up +a constant fire upon us from daylight till dark. I never could have +supposed, in my boyish days, that the time would arrive when I should +envy a cock upon Shrove Tuesday; yet such was my case when in this +infernal castle. It was certainly not giving us fair play; we had no +chance against such a force; but my captain was a knight-errant, +and as I had volunteered, I had no right to complain. Such was the +precision of the enemy's fire, that we could tell the stone that would +be hit by the next shot, merely from seeing where the last had struck, +and our men were frequently wounded by the splinters of granite with +which the walls were built, and others picked off like partridges, by +the Swiss corps on the hill close to us. + +Our force in the castle consisted of a hundred and thirty English +seamen and marines, one company of Spanish, and another of Swiss +troops in Spanish pay. Never were troops worse paid and fed, or better +fired at. We all pigged in together; dirty straw and fleas for our +beds; our food on the same scale of luxury; from the captain downwards +there was no distinction. Fighting is sometimes a very agreeable +pastime, but excess "palls on the sense:" and here we had enough of +it, without what I always thought an indispensable accompaniment, +namely, a good bellyful; nor did I conceive how a man could perform +his duty without it; but here I was forced, with many others, to make +the experiment, and when the boats could not land, which was often the +case, we piped to dinner _pro formâ_, as our captain liked regularity, +and drank cold water to fill our stomachs. + +I have often heard my poor old uncle say that no man knows what he can +do till he tries; and the enemy gave us plenty of opportunities of +displaying our ingenuity, industry, watchfulness, and abstinence. When +poor Penelope wove her web, the poet says-- + + "The night unravelled what the day began." + +With us it was precisely the reverse: the day destroyed all the +labours of the night. The hours of darkness were employed by us in +filling sand-bags, and laying them in the breach, clearing away +rubbish, and preparing to receive the enemy's fire, which was sure to +recommence at daylight. These avocations, together with a constant and +most vigilant watch against surprise, took up so much of our time that +little was left for repose, and our meals required still less. + +There was some originality in one of our modes of defence, and which, +not being _secundum artem_, might have provoked the smile of an +engineer. The captain contrived to make a shoot of smooth deal boards, +which he received from the ship: these he placed in a slanting +direction in the breach, and caused them to be well greased with +cook's slush; so that the enemies who wished to come into our +hold, must have jumped down upon them, and would in an instant be +precipitated into the ditch below, a very considerable depth, where +they might either have remained till the doctor came to them, or, if +they were able, begin their labours _de novo_. This was a very good +bug-trap; for, at that time, I thought just as little of killing a +Frenchman as I did of destroying the filthy little nightly depredator +just mentioned. + +Besides this slippery trick, which we played them with great success, +we served them another. We happened to have on board the frigate a +large quantity of fishhooks; these we planted, not only on the greasy +boards, but in every part where the intruders were likely to place +their hands or feet. The breach itself was mined, and loaded with +shells and hand-grenades; masked guns, charged up to the muzzle with +musket-balls, enfiladed the spot in every direction. Such were our +defences; and, considering that we had been three weeks in the castle, +opposed to such mighty odds, it is surprising that we only lost twenty +men. The crisis was now approaching. + +One morning, very early, I happened to have the look-out. The streak +of fog which during the night hangs between the hills in that country, +and presses down into the valleys, had just begun to rise, and the +stars to grow more dim above our heads, when I was looking over the +castle-wall towards the breach. The captain came out and asked me +what I was looking at. I told him I hardly knew; but there did appear +something unusual in the valley, immediately below the breach. He +listened a moment, looked attentively with his night-glass, and +exclaimed, in his firm voice, but in an undertoned manner "To +arms!--they are coming!" + +In three minutes every man was at his post; and though all were quick, +there was no time to spare, for by this time the black column of the +enemy was distinctly visible curling along the valley like a great +centipede; and, with the daring enterprise so common among the troops +of Napoleon, had begun in silence to mount the breach. It was an awful +and eventful moment; but the coolness and determination of the little +garrison was equal to the occasion. + +The word was given to take good aim, and a volley from the masked guns +and musketry was poured into the thick of them. They paused--deep +groans ascended! They retreated a few paces in confusion, then +rallied, and again advanced to the attack; and now the fire on both +sides was kept up without intermission. The great guns from the hill +fort, and the Swiss sharpshooters, still nearer, poured copious +volleys upon us, and with loud shouts cheered on their comrades to the +assault. As they approached and covered our mine, the train was fired, +and up they went in the air, and down they fell buried in the ruins. +Groans, screams, confusion, French yells, British hurras rent the +sky! The hills resounded with the shouts of victory! We sent them +hand-grenades in abundance, and broke their shins in glorious style. I +must say that the French behaved nobly, though many a tall grenadier +and pioneer fell by the symbol in front of his warlike cap. I cried +with rage and excitement; and we all fought like bull-dogs, for we +knew there was no quarter to be given. + +Ten minutes had elapsed since the firing began, and in that time many +a brave fellow had bit the dust. The head of their attacking column +had been destroyed by the explosion of our mine. Still they had +re-formed, and were again half-way up the breach when the day began to +dawn; and we saw a chosen body of one thousand men, led on by their +colonel, and advancing over the dead which had just fallen. + +The gallant leader appeared to be as cool and composed as if he were +at breakfast; with his drawn sword he pointed to the breach, and +we heard him exclaim, "_Suivez moi!_" I felt jealous of this brave +fellow--jealous of his being a Frenchman; and I threw a lighted +hand-grenade between his feet--he picked it up, and threw it from him +to a considerable distance. + +"Cool chap enough that," said the captain, who stood close to me; +"I'll give him another;" which he did, but this the officer kicked +away with equal _sang froid_ and dignity. "Nothing will cure that +fellow," resumed the captain, "but an ounce of lead on an empty +stomach--it's a pity, too, to kill so fine a fellow--but there is no +help for it." + +So saying, he took a musket out of my hand, which I had just +loaded--aimed, fired--the colonel staggered, clapped his hand to his +breast, and fell back into the arms of some of his men, who threw down +their muskets, and took him on their shoulders, either unconscious or +perfectly regardless of the death-work which was going on around them. +The firing redoubled from our musketry on this little group, every +man of whom was either killed or wounded. The colonel, again left to +himself, tottered a few paces further, till he reached a small bush, +not ten yards from the spot where he received his mortal wound. Here +he fell; his sword, which he still grasped in his right hand, rested +on the boughs, and pointed upwards to the sky, as if directing the +road to the spirit of its gallant master. + +With the life of the colonel ended the hopes of the French for that +day. The officers, we could perceive, did their duty--cheered, +encouraged, and drove on their men, but all in vain! We saw them pass +their swords through the bodies of the fugitives; but the men did not +even mind that--they would only be killed in their own way--they had +had fighting enough for one breakfast. The first impulse, the fiery +onset, had been checked by the fall of their brave leader, and _sauve +qui peut_, whether coming from the officers or drummers, no matter +which, terminated the affair, and we were left a little time to +breathe, and to count the number of our dead. + +The moment the French perceived from their batteries that the attempt +had failed, and that the leader of the enterprise was dead, they +poured in an angry fire upon us. I stuck my hat on the bayonet of +my musket, and just showed it above the wall. A dozen bullets were +through it in a minute: very fortunately my head was not in it. + +The fire of the batteries having ceased, which it generally did at +stated periods, we had an opportunity of examining the point of +attack. Scaling-ladders, and dead bodies lay in profusion. All the +wounded had been removed, but what magnificent "food for powder" were +the bodies which lay before us!--all, it would seem, picked men; not +one less than six feet, and some more: they were clad in their +grey _capots_, to render their appearance more _sombre_, and less +discernible in the twilight of the morning: and as the weather was +cold during the nights, I secretly determined to have one of those +great coats as a _chère amie_ to keep me warm in night-watches. I also +resolved to have the colonel's sword to present to my captain; and as +soon as it was dark I walked down the breach, brought up one of the +scaling-ladders, which I deposited in the castle; and having done so +much for the king, I set out to do something for myself. + +It was pitch dark. I stumbled on: the wind blew a hurricane, and the +dust and mortar almost blinded me; but I knew my way pretty well. Yet +there was something very jackall-like, in wandering about among dead +bodies in the night-time, and I really felt a horror at my situation. +There was a dreadful stillness between the blasts, which the pitch +darkness made peculiarly awful to an unfortified mind. It is for this +reason that I would ever discourage night-attacks, unless you can rely +on your men. They generally fail: because the man of common bravery, +who would acquit himself fairly in broad daylight, will hang back +during the night. Fear and Darkness have always been firm allies; and +are inseparably playing into each other's hands. Darkness conceals +Fear, and therefore Fear loves Darkness, because it saves the coward +from shame; and when the fear of shame is the only stimulus to fight, +daylight is essentially necessary. + +I crept cautiously along, feeling for the dead bodies. The first I +laid my hand on, made my blood curdle. It was the lacerated thigh of a +grenadier, whose flesh had been torn off by a hand-grenade. "Friend," +said I, "if I may judge from the nature of your wound, your great coat +is not worth having." The next subject I handled, had been better +killed. A musket-ball through his head had settled all his tradesmen's +bills; and I hesitated not in becoming residuary legatee, as I was +sure the assets would more than discharge the undertaker's bill; but +the body was cold and stiff, and did not readily yield its garment. + +I, however, succeeded in obtaining my object; in which I arrayed +myself, and went on in search of the colonel's sword; but here I had +been anticipated by a Frenchman. The colonel, indeed, lay there, stiff +enough, but his sword was gone. I was preparing to return, when I +encountered, not a dead, but a living enemy. + +"_Qui vive_?" said a low voice. + +"_Anglois, bête_!" answered I, in a low tone: and added, "_mais les +corsairs ne se battent pas_" + +"_Cest vrai_" said he; and growling, "_bon soir_" he was soon out of +sight. I scrambled back to the castle, gave the countersign to the +sentinel, and showed my new great coat with a vast deal of glee and +satisfaction; some of my comrades went on the same sort of expedition, +and were rewarded with more or less success. + +In a few days the dead bodies on the breach were nearly denuded by +nightly visitors; but that of the colonel lay respected and untouched. +The heat of the day had blackened it, and it was now deprived of all +its manly beauty, and nothing remained but a loathsome corpse. +The rules of war, as well as of humanity, demanded the honourable +interment of the remains of this hero; and our captain, who was the +very flower of chivalry, desired me to stick a white handkerchief on +a pike, as a flag of truce, and bury the bodies, if the enemy would +permit us I went out accordingly, with a spade and a pick-axe; but the +_tirailleurs_ on the hill began with their rifles, and wounded one of +my men. I looked at the captain, as much as to say, "Am I to proceed?" +He motioned with his hand to go on, and I then began digging a hole by +the side of a dead body, and the enemy, seeing my intention, desisted +from firing. I had buried several, when the captain came out and +joined me, with a view of reconnoitring the position of the enemy. +He was seen from the fort, and recognized; and his intention pretty +accurately guessed at. + +We were near the body of the colonel, which we were going to inter; +when the captain, observing a diamond ring on the finger of the +corpse, said to one of the sailors, "You may just as well take that +off: it can be of no use to him now." The man tried to get it off, but +the rigidity of the muscle after death prevented his moving it. "He +won't feel your knife, poor fellow," said the captain; "and a finger +more or less is no great matter to him now: off with it." + +The sailor began to saw the finger-joint with his knife, when down +came a twenty-four pound shot, and with such a good direction that it +took the shoe off the man's foot, and the shovel out of the hand of +another man. "In with him, and cover him up!" said the captain. + +We did so; when another shot not quite so well directed as the first, +threw the dirt in our faces, and ploughed the ground at our feet. +The captain then ordered his men to run into the castle, which they +instantly obeyed; while he himself walked leisurely along through +a shower of musket-balls from those cursed Swiss dogs, whom I most +fervently wished at the devil, because, as an aide-de-camp, I felt +bound in honour as well as duty to walk by the side of my captain, +fully expecting every moment that a rifle-ball would have hit me where +I should have been ashamed to show the scar. I thought this funeral +pace, after the funeral was over, confounded nonsense; but my +fire-eating captain never had run away from a Frenchman, and did not +intend to begin then. + +I was behind him, making these reflections, and as the shot began +to fly very thick, I stepped up alongside of him, and, by degrees, +brought him between me and the fire. "Sir," said I, "as I am only +a midshipman, I don't care so much about honour as you do; and, +therefore, if it makes no difference to you, I'll take the liberty of +getting under your lee." He laughed, and said, "I did not know you +were here, for I meant you should have gone with the others: but, +since you are out of your station, Mr Mildmay, I will make that use of +you which you so ingeniously proposed to make of me. My life may be of +some importance here; but yours very little, and another midshipman +can be had from the ship only for asking: so just drop astern, if you +please, and do duty as a breastwork for me!" + +"Certainly, sir," said I, "by all means;" and I took my station +accordingly. + +"Now," said the captain, "if you are '_doubled up_,' I will take you +on my shoulders!" + +I expressed myself exceedingly obliged, not only for the honour he +had conferred on me, but also for that which he intended; but hoped I +should have no occasion to trouble him. + +Whether the enemy took pity on my youth and _innocence_, or whether +they purposely missed us, I cannot say: I only know I was very happy +when I found myself inside the castle with a whole skin, and should +very readily have reconciled myself to any measure which would have +restored me even to the comforts and conveniences of a man-of-war's +cockpit. All human enjoyment is comparative, and nothing ever +convinced me of it so much and so forcibly as what took place at this +memorable siege. + +Fortune, and the well known cowardice of the Spaniards, released me +from this jeopardy; they surrendered the citadel, after which the +castle was of no use, and we ran down to our boats as fast as we +could; and notwithstanding the very assiduous fire of the watchful +_tirailleurs_ on the hill, we all got on board without accident. + +There was one very singular feature in this affair. The Swiss +mercenaries in the French and Spanish services, opposed to each other, +behaved with the greatest bravery, and did their duty with unexceeded +fidelity; but being posted so near, and coming so often in contact +with each other, they would cry truce for a quarter of an hour, while +they made inquiries after their mutual friends; often recognizing each +other as fathers and sons, brothers and near relatives, fighting on +opposite sides. They would laugh and joke with each other, declare the +truce at an end, then load their muskets, and take aim, with the same +indifference, as regarded the object, as if they had been perfect +strangers; but, as I before observed, fighting is a trade. + +From Rosas we proceeded to join the admiral off Toulon; and being +informed that a battery of six brass guns, in the port of Silva, would +be in possession of the French in a few hours, we ran in, and anchored +within pistol-shot of it. We lashed blocks to our lower mast-heads, +rove hawsers through them, sent the ends on shore, made them fast +to the guns, and hove off three of them, one after another, by the +capstan; and had the end of the hawser on shore, ready for the others, +when our marine videttes were surprised by the French, driven in, and +retreated to the beach with the loss of one man taken prisoner. + +Not having sufficient force on shore to resist them, we re-embarked +our party, and the French, taking up a position behind the rocks, +commenced a heavy fire of musketry upon us. We answered it with +the same; and now and then gave them a great gun; but they had the +advantage of position, and wounded ten or eleven of our men from their +elevated stations behind the rocks. At sunset this ceased, when a boat +came off from the shore, pulled by one Spaniard; he brought a letter +for the captain, from the officer commanding the French detachment. +It presented the French captain's compliments to ours; regretted the +little interruption he had given to our occupation; remarked that the +weather was cold, and as he had been ordered off in a hurry, he had +not had time to provide himself; and as there was always a proper +feeling among _braves gens_, requested a few gallons of rum for +himself and followers. + +This request was answered with a _polite note_, and the spirits +required. The British captain hoped the commandant and his party would +make themselves comfortable, and have a _bon repos_. The captain, +however, intended the Frenchman should pay for the spirits, though not +in money, and sent in the bill about one o'clock in the morning. + +All at that hour was as still as death; the French guard had refreshed +themselves, and were enjoying the full extent of our captain's +benefaction, when he observed to us that it was a pity to lose the +boat which was left on shore, as well as the other brass guns, and +proposed making the attempt to bring off both. Five or six of us +stripped, and lowering ourselves into the water, very gently swam +ashore, in a breathless kind of silence, that would have done honour +to a Pawnee Loup Indian. The water was very cold, and at first almost +took away my respiration. We landed under the battery, and having +first secured our boat without noise, we crept softly up to where the +end of the hawsers lay by the side of the guns, to which we instantly +made them fast. About a dozen French soldiers were lying near, keeping +watch, fast asleep. + +We might easily have killed them all; but as we considered they were +under the influence of our rum, we abhorred such a violation of +hospitality. We helped ourselves, however, to most of the muskets that +were near us, and very quietly getting into the boat, put off and +rowed with two oars to the ship. The noise of the oars woke some of +the soldiers, who, jumping up, fired at us with all the arms they had +left; and I believe soon got a reinforcement, for they fired both +quick and well; and, as it was starlight and we were naked, our bodies +were easily seen, so that the shot came very thick about us. + +"Diving," said I, "is not running away;" so over we all went, except +two. I was down like a porpoise never rising till my head touched the +ship's copper. I swam round the stern, and was taken in on the side +opposite the enemy. My captain, I daresay, would have disdained such +a compromise; but though I was as proud as he was, I always thought, +with Falstaff, that "discretion was the better part of valour," +especially in a midshipman. + +The men left in the boat got safe on board with her. The hands were +all ready, and the moment our oars splashed in the water, they hove +round cheerfully, and the guns came galloping down the rocks like +young kangaroos. They were soon under water, and long before the +Frenchmen could get a cut at the hawsers. They then fired at them with +their muskets, in hopes of stranding the rope, but they failed in that +also. We secured the guns on board, and before daylight got under +weigh, and made sail for the fleet, which we joined shortly +afterwards. + +I here learned that my own ship had fought a gallant action with an +enemy's frigate, had taken her opponent, but had suffered so much that +she was ordered home for repairs, and had sailed for England from +Gibraltar. + +I had letters of introduction to the rear-admiral, who was second in +command; and I thought, under these circumstances the best thing I +could do would be to "clean myself," as the phrase used to be in those +days, and go on board and present them. I went accordingly, and saw +the flag-captain, who took my letters in to the admiral, and brought +out a verbal, and not a very civil message, saying, I might join +the ship, if I pleased, until my own returned to the station. As it +happened to suit my convenience, I _did_ please; and the manner in +which the favour was conferred disburdened my mind of any incumbrance +of gratitude. The reception was not such as I might have expected: had +the letters not been from people of distinction, and friends of the +rear-admiral, I should much have preferred remaining in the frigate, +whose captain also wished it, but that was not allowed. + +To the flag-ship, therefore, I came, and why I was brought here, I +never could discover, unless it was for the purpose of completing a +menagerie, for I found between sixty and seventy midshipmen already +assembled. They were mostly youngsters, followers of the rear-admiral, +and had seen very little, if any, service, and I had seen a great deal +for the time I had been afloat. Listening eagerly to my "yarns," +the youthful ardour of these striplings kindled, and they longed to +emulate my deeds. The consequence was numerous applications from the +midshipmen to be allowed to join the frigates on the station; not one +was contented in the flag-ship; and the captain having discovered that +I was the tarantula which had bitten them, hated me accordingly, and +not a jot more than I hated him. + +The captain was a very large, ill-made, broad-shouldered man, with +a lack-lustre eye, a pair of thick lips, and a very unmeaning +countenance. He wore a large pair of epaulettes; he was irritable in +his temper; and when roused, which was frequent, was always violent +and overbearing. His voice was like thunder, and when he launched out +on the poor midshipmen, they reminded me of the trembling bird which, +when fascinated by the eye of the snake, loses its powers, and falls +at once into the jaws of the monster. When much excited, he had a +custom of shaking his shoulders up and down; and his epaulettes, on +these occasions, flapped like the huge ears of a trotting elephant. +At the most distant view of his person or sound of his voice, every +midshipman, not obliged to remain, fled, like the land-crabs on a West +India beach. He was incessantly taunting me, was sure to find some +fault or other with me, and sneeringly called me "one of your frigate +midshipmen." + +Irritated by this unjust treatment, I one day answered that I _was_ +a frigate midshipman, and hoped I could do my duty as well as any +line-of-battle midshipman, of my own standing, in the service. For +this injudicious and rather impertinent remark, I was ordered aft on +the quarter-deck, and the captain went in to the admiral, and asked +permission to flog me; but the admiral refused, observing, that he did +not admire the system of flogging young gentlemen: and, moreover, that +in the present instance he saw no reason for it. So I escaped; but I +led a sad life of it, and often did I pray for the return of my own +ship. + +Among other exercises of the fleet, we used always to reef topsails at +sunset, and this was usually done by all the ships at the same moment, +waiting the signal from the admiral to begin; in this exercise there +was much foolish rivalry, and very serious accidents, as well as +numerous punishments, took place, in consequence of one ship trying to +excel another. On these occasions our captain would bellow and foam at +the mouth like a mad bull, up and down the quarter-deck. + +One fine evening the signal was made, the topsails lowered and the men +laying out on the yards, when a poor fellow from the main-topsail yard +fell, in his trying to lay out; and, striking his shoulder against the +main channels, broke his arm. I saw he was disabled, and could not +swim: and, perceiving him sinking, I darted overboard, and held him +until a boat came and picked us up; as the water was smooth, and there +was little wind, and the ship not going more than two miles an hour, I +incurred little risk. + +When I came on deck I found the captain fit for Bedlam, because the +accident had delayed the topsails going to the mast-head quite as +quick as the rest of the fleet. He threatened to flog the man for +falling overboard, and ordered me off the quarter-deck. This was +great injustice to both of us. Of all the characters I ever met +with, holding so high a rank in the service, this man was the most +unpleasant. + +Shortly after, we were ordered to Minorca to refit; here, to my great +joy, I found my own ship, and I "shook the dust off my feet," and +quitted the flag with a light heart. During the time I had been on +board, the admiral had never said, "How do ye do?" to me--nor did he +say, "Good-bye," when I quitted. Indeed, I should have left the ship +without ever having been honoured with his notice, if it had not +happened, that a favourite pointer of his was a shipmate of mine. I +recollect hearing of a man who boasted that the king had spoken to +him; and when it was asked what he had said, replied, "He desired me +to get out of his way." + +My intercourse with the admiral was about as friendly and flattering. +Pompey and I were on the poop. I presented him with a piece of hide +to gnaw, by way of pastime. The admiral came on the poop, and seeing +Pompey thus employed, asked who gave him that piece of hide? The +yeoman of the signals said it was me. The admiral shook his long +spy-glass at me, and said, "By G----, sir, if ever you give Pompey a +bit of hide again, I will flog you." + +This is all I have to say of the admiral, and all the admiral ever +said to me. + + + + +Chapter VIII + + Since laws were made for every degree, + I wonder we haven't better company on Tyburn tree. + + "_Beggar's Opera_." + + +While I was on board of this ship two poor men were executed for +mutiny. The scene was far more solemn to me than anything I had ever +beheld. Indeed it was the first thing of the kind I had ever been +present at. When we hear of executions on shore, we are always +prepared to read of some foul atrocious crime, some unprovoked and +unmitigated offence against the laws of civilized society, which a +just and merciful government cannot allow to pass unpunished. With us +at sea there are many shades of difference; but that which the law +of our service considers a serious offence is often no more than an +ebullition of local and temporary feeling, which in some cases might +be curbed, and in others totally suppressed by timely firmness and +conciliation. + +The ships had been a long time at sea, the enemy did not appear--and +there was no chance either of bringing him to action, or of returning +into port. Indeed nothing can be more dull and monotonous than a +blockading cruise "in the team," as we call it; that is, the ships +of the line stationed to watch an enemy. The frigates have, in this +respect, every advantage; they are always employed on shore, often +in action, and the more men they have killed, the happier are the +survivors. Some melancholy ferment on board of the flag-ship I was in +caused an open mutiny. Of course it was very soon quelled; and the +ringleaders having been tried by a court-martial, two of them were +condemned to be hanged at the yard-arm of their own ship, and were +ordered for execution the following day but one. + +Our courts-martial are always arrayed in the most pompous manner, +and certainly are calculated to strike the mind with awe--even of a +captain himself. A gun is fired at eight o'clock in the morning from +the ship where it is to be held, and a union flag is displayed at the +mizen peak. If the weather be fine, the ship is arranged with the +greatest nicety; her decks are as white as snow--her hammocks are +stowed with care--her ropes are taut--her yards square--her guns +run out--and a guard of marines, under the orders of a lieutenant, +prepared to receive every member of the court with the honour due to +his rank. Before nine o'clock they are all assembled; the officers in +their undress uniform, unless an admiral is to be tried. The great +cabin is prepared, with a long table covered with a green cloth. Pens, +ink, paper, prayer-books, and the Articles of War, are laid round to +every member. "Open the court," says the president. + +The court is opened, and officers and men indiscriminately stand +round. The prisoners are now brought in under the charge of the +provost-marshal, a master-at-arms, with his sword drawn, and placed +at the foot of the table, on the left hand of the judge-advocate. The +court is sworn to do its duty impartially, and if there is any doubt, +to let it go in favour of the prisoner. Having done this, the members +sit down, covered if they please. + +The judge-advocate is then sworn, and the order for the court-martial +read. The prisoner is put on his trial; if he says anything to commit +himself, the court stops him, and kindly observes, "We do not want +your evidence against yourself; we want only to know what others can +prove against you." The unfortunate man is offered any assistance he +may require; and when the defence is over, the court is cleared, the +doors are shut, and the minutes, which have been taken down by the +judge-advocate, are carefully read over, the credibility of the +witnesses weighed, and the president puts the question to the youngest +member first, "Proved, or not proved?" + +All having given their answer, if seven are in favour of proved, and +six against, proved is recorded. The next question--if for mutiny or +desertion, or other capital crime--"Flogging or death?" The votes +are given in the same way; if the majority be for death, the +judge-advocate writes the sentence, and it is signed by all the +members, according to seniority, beginning with the president and +ending with the judge-advocate. The court is now opened again, the +prisoner brought in, and an awful and deep silence prevails. The +members of the court all put their hats on, and are seated; every +one else, except the provost-marshal is uncovered. As soon as the +judge-advocate has read the sentence, the prisoners are delivered to +the custody of the provost-marshal, by a warrant from the president, +and he has charge of them till the time for the execution of the +sentence. + +About three o'clock in the afternoon, I received a message from one of +the prisoners, saying, he wished much to speak with me. I followed the +master-at-arms down to the screened cabin, in the gun-room, where the +men were confined with their legs in irons. These irons consist of one +long bar and a set of shackles. The shackles fit the small part of the +leg, just above the ankle; and, having an eye on each end of them, +they receive the leg. The end of the bar is then passed through, +and secured with a padlock. I found the poor fellows sitting on a +shot-box. Their little meal lay before them untouched; one of them +cried bitterly; the other, a man of the name of Strange, possessed a +great deal of equanimity, although evidently deeply affected. This man +had been pretty well educated in youth, but having taken a wild and +indolent turn, had got into mischief, and to save himself from a +severe chastisement, had run away from his friends, and entered on +board a man-of-war. In this situation he had found time, in the +intervals of duty, to read and to think; he became, in time, sullen, +and separated himself from the occasional merriment of his messmates; +and it is not improbable that this moody temper had given rise to the +mutinous acts for which he was to suffer. + +This man now apologized for the liberty he had taken, and said he +would not detain me long. "You see, sir," said he, "that my poor +friend is quite overcome with the horror of his situation: nor do I +wonder at it. He is very different from the hardened malefactors that +are executed on shore: we are neither of us afraid to die; but such a +death as this, Mr Mildmay--to be hung up like dogs, an example to +the fleet, and a shame and reproach to our friends--this wrings our +hearts! It is this consideration, and to save the feelings of my poor +mother, that I have sent for you. I saw you jump overboard to save a +poor fellow from drowning; so I thought you would not mind doing a +good turn for another unfortunate sailor. I have made my will, and +appointed you my executor; and with this power of attorney you will +receive all my pay and prize-money, which I will thank you to give to +my dear mother, whose address you will find written here. My motive +for this is, that she may never learn the history of my death. You can +tell her that I died for my country's good, which is very true, for I +acknowledge the justice of my sentence, and own that a severe example +is wanting. It is eleven years since I was in England; I have served +faithfully the whole of that time, nor did I ever misbehave except +in this one instance. I think if our good king knew my sad story, he +would be merciful; but God's will be done! Yet, if I had a wish, it +would be that the enemy's fleet would come out, and that I might die, +as I have lived, defending my country. But, Mr Mildmay, I have one +very important question to ask you--do you believe that there is such +a thing as a future state?" + +"Most surely," said I; "though we all live as if we believed there was +no such thing. But why do you doubt it?" + +"Because," said the poor fellow, "when I was an officer's servant, +I was one day tending the table in the ward-room, and I heard the +commander of a sloop of war, who was dining there with his son, say +that it was all nonsense--that there was no future state, and the +Bible was a heap of lies. I have never been happy since." + +I told him that I was extremely sorry that any officer should have +used such expressions at all, particularly before him; that I was +incapable of restoring his mind to its proper state; but that I should +recommend his immediately sending for the chaplain, who, I had no +doubt, would give him all the comfort he could desire. He thanked me +for this advice, and profited by it, as he assured me in his last +moments. + +"And now, sir," said he, "let me give _you_ a piece of advice. When +you are a captain, as I am very sure you will be, do not worry your +men into mutiny by making what is called a smart ship. Cleanliness and +good order are what seamen like; but niggling, polishing, scraping +iron bars, and ring-bolts, and the like of that, a sailor dislikes +more than a flogging at the gangway. If, in reefing topsails, you +happen to be a minute later than another ship, never mind it, so long +as your sails are well reefed, and fit to stand blowing weather. Many +a sail is split by bad reefing, and many a good sailor has lost his +life by that foolish hurry which has done incredible harm in the navy. +What can be more cruel or unjust than to flog the last man off the +yard? seeing that he is necessarily the most active, and cannot get in +without the imminent danger of breaking his neck; and, moreover, that +one man _must_ be last. Depend upon it, sir, 'that nothing is well +done which is done in a hurry.' But I have kept you too long. God +bless you, sir; remember my poor mother, and be sure you meet me on +the forecastle to-morrow morning." + +The fatal morning came. It was eight o'clock. The gun fired--the +signal for punishment flew at our mast-head. The poor men gave a deep +groan, exclaiming, "Lord have mercy upon us!--our earthly career and +troubles are nearly over!" The master-at-arms came in, unlocked the +padlock at the end of the bars, and, slipping off the shackles, +desired the marine sentinels to conduct the prisoners to the +quarter-deck. + +Here was a scene of solemnity which I hardly dare attempt to describe. +The day was clear and beautiful; the top-gallant yards were crossed on +board of all the ships; the colours were flying; the crews were all +dressed in white trousers and blue jackets, and hung in clusters, like +bees, on the side of the rigging facing our ship: a guard of marines, +under arms, was placed along each gangway, but on board of our ship +they were on the quarter-deck. Two boats from each ship lay off upon +their oars alongside of us, with a lieutenant's and a corporal's guard +in each, with fixed bayonets. The hands were all turned up by the +boatswain and his mates with a shrill whistle, and calling down each +hatchway, "All hands attend punishment!" + +You now heard the quick trampling of feet up the ladders, but not +a word was spoken. The prisoners stood on the middle of the +quarter-deck, while the captain read the sentence of the court-martial +and the order from the commander-in-chief for the execution The +appropriate prayers and psalms having been read by the chaplain, with +much feeling and devotion, the poor men were asked if they were ready; +they both replied in the affirmative, but each requested to have a +glass of wine, which was instantly brought. They drank it off, bowing +most respectfully to the captain and officers. + +The admiral did not appear, it not being etiquette; but the prisoners +desired to be kindly and gratefully remembered to him; they then +begged to shake hands with the captain and all the officers, which +having done, they asked permission to address the ship's company. The +captain ordered them all to come aft on the top and quarter-deck. The +most profound silence reigned, and there was not an eye but had a tear +in it. + +William Strange, the man who had sent for me, then said, in a clear +and audible tone of voice:--"Brother sailors, attend to the last words +of a dying man. We are brought here at the instigation of some of you +who are now standing in safety among the crowd: you have made fools of +us, and we are become the victims to the just vengeance of the laws. +Had you succeeded in the infamous design you contemplated, what would +have been the consequences? Ruin, eternal ruin, to yourselves and to +your families; a disgrace to your country, and the scorn of those +foreigners to whom you proposed delivering up the ship. Thank God you +did not succeed. Let our fate be a warning to you, and endeavour to +show by your future acts your deep contrition for the past. Now, sir," +turning to the captain, "we are ready." + +This beautiful speech from the mouth of a common sailor must as much +astonish the reader as it then did the captain and officers of the +ship. But Strange, as I have shown, was no common man; he had had +the advantage of education, and, like many of the ringleaders at the +mutiny of the Nore, was led into the error of refusing to _obey_, from +the conscious feeling that he was born to _command_. + +The arms of the prisoners were then pinioned, and the chaplain led the +way, reading the funeral service; the master-at-arms, with two +marine sentinels, conducted them along the starboard gangway to the +forecastle; here a stage was erected on either side, over the +cathead, with steps to ascend to it; a tail block was attached to the +boom-iron, at the outer extremity of each foreyard-arm, and through +this a rope was rove, one end of which came down to the stage; the +other was led along the yard into the catharpings, and thence down +upon the main-deck. A gun was primed and ready to fire, on the fore +part of the ship, directly beneath the scaffold. + +I attended poor Strange to the very last moment; he begged me to see +that the halter, which was a piece of line, like a clothes' line, +was properly made fast round his neck, for he had known men suffer +dreadfully from the want of this precaution. A white cap was placed on +the head of each man, and when both mounted the platform, the cap was +drawn over their eyes. They shook hands with me, with their messmates, +and with the chaplain, assuring him that they died happy, and +confident in the hopes of redemption. They then stood still while the +yard ropes were fixed to the halter by a toggle in the running noose +of the latter; the other end of the yard-ropes were held by some +twenty or thirty men on each side of the main-deck, where two +lieutenants of the ship attended. + +All being ready, the captain waved a white handkerchief, the gun +fired, and in an instant the poor fellows were seen swinging at either +yard-arm. They had on blue jackets and white trousers, and were +remarkably fine-looking young men. They did not appear to suffer any +pain, and at the expiration of an hour, the bodies were lowered down, +placed in coffins, and sent on shore for interment. + +On my arrival in England, nine months after, I acquitted myself of my +promise, and paid to the mother of William Strange upwards of fifty +pounds, for pay and prize-money. I told the poor woman that her son +had died a Christian, and had fallen for the good of his country; +and having said this, I took a hasty leave, for fear she should ask +questions. + +That the execution of a man on board of a ship of war does not always +produce a proper effect upon the minds of the younger boys, the +following fact may serve to prove. + +There were two little fellows on board the ship; one was the son of +the carpenter, the other of the boatswain. They were both of them +surprised and interested at the sight, but not proportionably shocked. +The next day I was down in one of the wings, reading by the light of +a purser's dip--_vulgo_, a farthing candle, when these two boys came +sliding down the main hatchway by one of the cables. Whether they saw +me, and thought I would not 'peach, or whether they supposed I was +asleep, I cannot tell; but they took their seats on the cables, in +the heart of the tier, and for some time appeared to be in earnest +conversation. They had some articles folded up in a dirty check shirt +and pocket-handkerchief; they looked up at the battens, to which the +hammocks are suspended, and producing a long rope-yarn, tried to pass +it over one of them; but unable to reach, one boy climbed on the back +of the other, and effected two purposes, by reeving one end of the +line, and bringing it down to the cables again. They next unrolled the +shirt, and, to my surprise, took out the boatswain's kitten, about +three months old; its fore paws were tied behind its back, its hind +feet were tied together, and a fishing-lead attached to them; a piece +of white rag was tied over its head as a cap. + +It was now pretty evident what the fate of poor puss was likely to be, +and why the lead was made fast to her feet. The rope-yarn was tied +round her neck; they each shook one of her paws, and pretended to cry. +One of the urchins held in his hand a fife, into which he poured as +much flour as it would hold out of the handkerchief, the other held +the end of the rope-yarn: every ceremony was gone through that they +could think of. + +"Are you ready?" said the executioner, or he that held the line. + +"All ready," replied the boy with the fife. + +"Fire the gun!" said the hangman. + +The boy applied one end of the fife to his mouth, blew out all the +flour, and in this humble imitation of the smoke of a gun, poor puss +was run up to the batten, where she hung till she was dead. I am +ashamed to say I did not attempt to save the kitten's life, although I +caused her foul murder to be revenged by the _cat_. + +After the body had hung a certain time, they took it down and buried +it in the shot-locker; this was an indictable offence, as the smell +would have proved, so I lodged the information; the body was found, +and as the facts were clear, the law took its course, to the great +amusement of the bystanders, who saw the brats tied upon a gun, and +well flogged. + +The boatswain ate the kitten, first, he said, because he had +"_larned_" to eat cats in Spain; secondly, because she had _not_ died +a natural death (I thought otherwise); and his last reason was more +singular than either of the others: he had seen a picture in a church +in Spain, of Peter's vision of the animals let down in the sheet, and +there was a cat among them. Observing an alarm of scepticism in my +eye, he thought proper to confirm his assertion with an oath. + +"Might it not have been a rabbit?" said I. + +"Rabbit, sir; d----n me, think I didn't know a cat from a rabbit? Why +one has got short ears and long tail, and t'other has got _wicee +wersee_, as we calls it." + +A grand carnival masquerade was to be given at Minorca in honour of +the English, and the place chosen for the exhibition was a church; all +which was perfectly consistent with the Romish faith. I went in the +character of a fool, and met many brother officers there. It was a +comical sight to see the anomalous groups stared at by the pictures of +the Virgin Mary and all the saints, whose shrines were lit up for the +occasion with wax tapers. The admiral, rear-admiral, and most of the +captains and officers of the fleet were present; the place was about a +mile from the town. + +Having hired a fool's dress, I mounted that very appropriate animal--a +donkey, and set off amidst the shouts of a thousand dirty vagabonds. +On my arrival, I began to show off in somersaults, leaps, and all +kinds of practical jokes. The manner in which I supported the +character drew a little crowd around me. I never spoke to an admiral +or captain unless he addressed me first; and then I generally sold him +a bargain. Being very well acquainted with the domestic economy of the +ships on the station, a martinet asked me if I would enter for his +ship. "No," said I, "you would give me three dozen for not lashing +up my hammock properly." "Come with me," said another. "No," said I, +"your bell-rope is too short--you cannot reach it to order another +bottle of wine before all the officers have left your table." Another +promised me kind treatment and plenty of wine. "No," said I, "in your +ship I should be coals at Newcastle; besides, your coffee is too weak, +your steward only puts one ounce into six cups." + +These hits afforded a good deal of mirth among the crowd, and even the +admiral himself honoured me with a smile. I bowed respectfully to +his lordship, who merely said--"What do you want of me, fool?" "Oh, +nothing at all, my lord," said I, "I have only a small favour to ask +of you." "What is that?" said the admiral. "Only to make me a captain, +my lord." "Oh, no," said the admiral, "we never make fools captains." +"No" said I, clapping my arms akimbo in a very impertinent manner, +"then that, I suppose, is a new regulation. How long has the order in +council been out?" + +The good-humoured old chief laughed heartily at this piece of +impertinence; but the captain whose ship I had so recently quitted was +silly enough to be offended: he found me out, and went and complained +of me to my captain the next day; but my captain only laughed at him, +said he thought it an excellent joke, and invited me to dinner. + +Our ship was ordered to Gibraltar, where we arrived soon after; and +a packet coming in from England, I received letters from my father, +announcing the death of my dearest mother. O how I then regretted all +the sorrows I had ever caused her; how incessantly did busy memory +haunt me with all my misdeeds, and recall to mind the last moment I +had seen her! I never supposed I could have regretted her half so +much. My father stated that in her last moments she had expressed the +greatest solicitude for my welfare. She feared the career of life on +which I had entered would not conduce to my eternal welfare, however +much it might promise to my temporal advantage. Her dying injunctions +to me were never to forget the moral and religious principles in which +she had brought me up; and, with her last blessing, implored me to +read my Bible, and take it as my guide through life. + +My father's letter was both an affecting and forcible appeal; and +never, in the whole course of my subsequent life, were my feelings so +worked upon as they were on that occasion. I went to my hammock with +an aching head and an almost broken heart. A retrospection of my life +afforded me no comfort. The numerous acts of depravity or pride, of +revenge or deceit, of which I had been guilty, rushed through my mind, +as the tempest through the rigging, and called me to the most serious +and melancholy reflections. It was some time before I could collect +my thoughts and analyse my feelings; but when I recalled all my +misdeeds--my departure from that path of virtue, so often and so +clearly laid down by my affectionate parent--I was overwhelmed with +grief, shame, and repentance. I considered how often I had been on the +brink of eternity; and had I been cut off in my sins, what would have +been my destiny? I started with horror at the dangers I had escaped, +and looked forward with gloomy apprehension at those that still +awaited me. I sought in vain, among all my actions since I left my +mother's care, one single deed of virtue--one that sprang from a good +motive. There was, it is true, an outward gloss and polish for the +world to look at; but all was dark within: and I felt that a keener +eye than that of mortality was searching my soul, where deception was +worse than useless. + +At twelve o'clock, before I had once closed my eyes, I was called to +relieve the deck, having what is called the middle watch, i.e. from +midnight till four in the morning. We had, the day before, buried +a quarter-master, nick-named Quid, an old seaman who had destroyed +himself by drinking--no very uncommon case in His Majesty's service. +The corpse of a man who has destroyed his inside by intemperance is +generally in a state of putridity immediately after death; and the +decay, particularly in warm climates, is very rapid. A few hours after +Quid's death, the body emitted certain effluvia denoting the necessity +of immediate interment. It was accordingly sewn up in a hammock; and +as the ship lay in deep water, with a current sweeping round the bay, +and the boats being at the same time all employed at the dockyard, the +first lieutenant caused shot to be tied to the feet, and, having read +the funeral service, launched the body overboard from the gangway, as +the ship lay at anchor. + +I was walking the deck, in no very happy state of mind, reflecting +seriously on parts of that Bible which for more than two years I had +never looked into, when my thoughts were called to the summons which +poor Quid had received, and the beauty of the funeral service which +I had heard read over him--"I am the resurrection and the life." The +moon, which had been obscured, suddenly burst from a cloud, and a cry +of horror proceeded from the look-out man on the starboard gangway. +I ran to inquire the cause, and found him in such a state of nervous +agitation that he could only say,--"Quid--Quid!" and point with his +finger into the water. + +I looked over the side, and, to my amazement there was the body of +Quid, + +"All in dreary hammock shrouded," + +perfectly upright, and floating with the head and shoulders above +water. A slight undulation of the waves gave it the appearance of +nodding its head; while the rays of the moon enabled us to trace the +remainder of the body underneath the surface. For a few moments, I +felt a horror which I cannot describe, and contemplated the object in +awful silence; while my blood ran cold, and I felt a sensation as if +my hair was standing on end. I was completely taken by surprise, and +thought the body had risen up to warn me; but in a few seconds I +regained my presence of mind, and I soon perceived the origin of this +reappearance of the corpse. I ordered the cutter to be manned, and, +in the meantime, went down to inform the first lieutenant of what had +occurred. He laughed, and said, "I suppose the old boy finds salt +water not quite so palatable as grog. Tie some more shot to his feet, +and bring the old fellow to his moorings again. Tell him, the next +time he trips his anchor, not to run on board of us. He had his +regular allowance of prayer: I gave him the whole service, and I shall +not give him any more." So saying, he went to sleep again. + +This apparently singular circumstance is easily accounted for. Bodies +decomposing from putridity, generate a quantity of gas, which swells +them up to an enormous size, and renders them buoyant. The body of +this man was thrown overboard just as decomposition was in progress: +the shot made fast to the feet were sufficient to sink it at the time; +but in a few hours after were not competent to keep it at the bottom, +and it came up to the surface in that perpendicular position which I +have described. The current in the bay being at the time either slack +or irregular, it floated at the spot whence it had been launched into +the water. + +The cutter, being manned, was sent with more shot to attach to the +body, and sink it. When they attempted to hold it with the boat-hook, +it eluded the touch, turning round and round, or bobbing under the +water, and coming up again, as if in sport: but accident saved them +any further trouble; for the bowman, reproached by the boat's crew +for not hooking the body, got angry, and darting the spike of the +boat-hook into the abdomen, the pent-up gas escaped with a loud whiz, +and the corpse instantly sank like a stone. Many jokes were passed on +the occasion; but I was not in humour for joking on serious subjects: +and before the watch was out I had made up my mind to go home, and to +quit the service, as I found I had no chance of obeying my mother's +dying injunctions if I remained where I was. + +The next morning I stated my wishes to the captain, not of quitting +the service, but of going home in consequence of family arrangements. +This was about as necessary as that I should make a pilgrimage to +Jerusalem. The captain had been told of the unpleasant news I had +received, and having listened to all I had to say, he replied, that if +I could make up my mind to remain with him it would be better for me. + +"You are now," said he, "accustomed to my ways--you know your duty, +and do your work well; indeed, I have made honourable mention of you +to the Admiralty in my public letter: you know your own business best" +(here he was mistaken--he ought not to have parted with me for the +reasons which I offered); "but my advice to you is to stay." + +I thanked him--but being bent and determined on going home, he acceded +to my request; gave me my discharge, and added a very handsome +certificate of good conduct, far beyond the usually prescribed form; +he also told me that if I chose to return to him he would keep a +vacancy for me. I parted with the officers, my messmates, and the +ship's company with regret. I had been more than three years with +them; and my stormy commencement had settled down into a quiet and +peaceful acknowledgment of my supremacy in the berth; my qualities +were such as to make me a universal favourite, and I was followed down +the ship's side with the hearty good wishes of all. I was pulled in +the cutter on board of a ship of the line, in which I was ordered to +take my passage to England. + + + + +Chapter IX + + How happy could I be with either, + Were t'other dear charmer away! + + "_Beggar's Opera_." + + +Hell, they say, is paved with good intentions. If so, it has a much +better pavement than it deserves; for the "trail of the serpent +is over us all." Then why send to hell the greatest proof of our +perfection before the fall, and of weakness subsequent to it? Honest +and sincere professions of amendment must carry with them to the +Throne of Grace a strong recommendation, even if we are again led +astray by the allurements of sense and the snares of the world. At +least, our tears of contrition and repentance, our sorrow for the +past, and our firm resolves for the future, must have given "joy in +heaven," and consequently cannot have been converted into pavement for +the infernal regions. + +Pleasure and pain, in youth, are, for the most part, transient +impressions, whether they arise from possession or loss of worldly +enjoyment, or from a sense of having done well or ill in our career. +The excitement, though strong, is not durable; and thus it was with +me. I had not been more than four days on board the ship of the line +in which I took my passage to England, when I felt my spirits buoyant, +and my levity almost amounting to delirium. The hours of reflection +were at first shortened, and then dismissed entirely. The general +mirth of my new shipmates at the thoughts of once more revisiting +their dear native land--the anticipation of indulging in the sensual +worship of Bacchus and Venus, the constant theme of discourse among +the midshipmen; the loud and senseless applause bestowed on the +coarsest ribaldry--these all had their share in destroying that +religious frame of mind in which I had parted with my first captain, +and seemed to awaken me to a sense of the folly I had been guilty of +in quitting a ship, where I was not only at the head of my mess, but +in a fair way for promotion. I considered that I had acted the part of +a madman, and had again begun to renew my career of sin and of folly, +a little, and but a little, sobered by the recent event. + +We arrived in England after the usual passage from the Rock. I +consented to pass two days at Portsmouth, with my new companions, to +revisit our old haunts, and to commit those excesses which fools +and knaves applauded and partook of, at my expense, leaving me +full leisure to repent, after we separated. I, however, did muster +resolution enough to pack my trunk; and, after an extravagant supper +at the Fountain, retired to bed intoxicated, and the next morning, +with an aching head, threw myself into the coach and drove off for +London. A day of much hilarity is generally succeeded by one of +depression. This is fair and natural; we draw too largely on our +stock, and squander our enjoyment like our money, leaving us the next +day with low spirits and a lower purse. + +A stupid dejection succeeded the boisterous mirth of the overnight. +I slumbered in a corner of the coach till about one o'clock, when we +reached Godalming, where I alighted, took a slight refreshment, and +resumed my seat. As we drove along, I had more leisure, and was in a +fitter frame of mind to review my past conduct since I had quitted +my ship at Gibraltar. My self-examination, as usual, produced no +satisfactory results. I perceived that the example of bad company had +swept away every trace of good resolution which I had made on the +death of my mother. I saw, with grief, that I had no dependence on +myself; I had forgotten all my good intentions, and the firm vows of +amendment with which I had bound myself, and had yielded to the first +temptation which came in my way. + +In vain did I call up every black and threatening cloud of domestic +sorrow, which was to meet me on my return home--the dreadful vacuum +occasioned by my mother's death--the grief of my father--my brother +and my sisters in deep mourning, and the couch on which I had left the +best of parents, when I turned away my thoughtless head from her in +the anguish of her grief. I renewed my promise of amendment, and felt +some secret consolation in doing so. + +When I arrived at my father's door, the servant who let me in, greeted +me with a loud and hearty welcome. I ran into the drawing-room, where +I found that my brother and sisters had a party of children to spend +the evening with them. They were dancing to the music of a piano, +played on by my aunt, while my father sat in his arm-chair, in high +good-humour. + +This was a very different scene from what I had expected. I was +prepared for a sentimental and affecting meeting; and my feelings were +all worked up to their full bearing for the occasion. Judge, then, of +the sudden revulsion in my mind, when I found mirth and good +humour where I expected tears and lamentations. It had escaped my +recollection, that although the death of my mother was an event new +to me, it had happened six months before I had heard of it; and, +consequently, with them grief had given way to time. I was astonished +at their apparent want of feeling; while they gazed with surprise at +the sight of me, and the symbols of woe displayed in my equipment. + +My father welcomed me with surprise; asked where my ship was, and what +had brought her home. The fact was, that in my sudden determination to +return to England, I had spared myself the trouble of writing to make +known my intentions; and, indeed, if I had written, I should have +arrived as soon as my letter, unless (which I ought to have done) I +had written on my arrival at Portsmouth, instead of throwing away my +time in the very worst species of dissipation. Unable, therefore, in +the presence of many witnesses, to give my father that explanation +which he had a right to expect, I suffered greatly for a time in his +opinion. He very naturally supposed that some disgraceful conduct on +my part was the cause of my sudden return. His brow became clouded and +his mind seemed occupied with deep reflection. + +This behaviour of my father, together with the continued noisy mirth +of my brother and sisters, gave me considerable pain. I felt as if, +in the sad news of my mother's death, I had over-acted my part in the +feeling I had shown, and the sacrifice I had made in quitting my ship. +On explaining to my father, in private, the motives of my conduct, I +was not successful. He could not believe that my mother's death was +the sole cause of my return to England. I stood many firm and angry +interrogations as to the possible good which could accrue to me by +quitting my ship. I showed him the captain's handsome certificate, +which only mortified him the more. In vain did I plead my excess +of feeling. He replied with an argument that I feel to have been +unanswerable--that I had quitted my ship when on the very pinnacle of +favour, and in the road to fortune. "And what," said he, "is to become +of the navy and the country, if every officer is to return home when +he receives the news of the death of a relation?" + +In proportion as my father's arguments carried conviction, they did +away, at the same time, all the good impressions of my mother's dying +injunction. If her death was a matter of so little importance, her +last words were equally so; and from that moment I ceased to think of +either. My father's treatment of me was now very different from what +it had ever been during my mother's lifetime. My requests were +harshly refused, and I was lectured more as a child than as a lad of +_eighteen_, who had seen much of the world. + +Coldness on his part was met by a spirit of resistance on mine. Pride +came in to my assistance. A dispute arose one evening, at the finale +of which I gave him to understand that if I could not live quietly +under his roof, I would quit it. He calmly recommended me to do so, +little supposing that I should have taken his advice. I left the room, +banging the door after me, packed up a few changes of linen, and took +my departure, unperceived by any one, with my bundle on my shoulder, +and about sixteen shillings in my pocket. + +Here was a great mismanagement on the part of my father, and still +greater on mine. He was anxious to get me afloat again, and I had no +sort of objection to going; but his impatience and my pride spoiled +all. Reflection soon came to me, but came too late. Night was fast +approaching: I had no house over my head, and my exchequer was in no +very flourishing condition. + +I had walked six miles from my father's house, when I began to tire. +It became dark, and I had no fixed plan. A gentleman's carriage came +by; I took up a position in the rear of it, and had ridden four miles, +when, as the carriage was slowly dragging up a hill, I was discovered +by the parties inside; and the postilion, who had dismounted and been +informed of it, saluted me with two or three smart cuts of his whip, +intimating that I was of no use, but rather an incumbrance which could +be dispensed with. + +My readers know that I had long since adopted the motto of our +northern neighbours, _Nemo me_, &c.; so waiting very quietly till the +driver had mounted his horses, at the top of the hill, that he might +be more at my mercy, I discharged a stone at his head which caused him +to vacate his seat, and fall under his horse's belly. The animals, +frightened at his fall, turned short round to the right, or they would +have gone over him, and ran furiously down the hill. The post-boy, +recovering his legs, followed his horses without bestowing a thought +on the author of the mischief; and I made all the haste I could in +the opposite direction, perfectly indifferent as to the fate of the +parties inside of the carriage, for I still smarted with the blows I +had received. + +"Fools and unkind," muttered I, looking back, as they disappeared at +the bottom of the hill, with frightful velocity, "you are rightly +served. I was a trespasser, 'tis true, but a civil request would have +had all the effect you required--that of inducing me to get down; but +a whip to me--" And with my blood still boiling at the recollection, I +hastily pursued my journey. + +In a few minutes I reached the little town of ----, the lights of which +were visible at the time the horses had turned down the hill and run +away. Entering the first inn I came to, I found the large room below +occupied by a set of strolling players, who had just returned from a +successful performance of "Romeo and Juliet;" and, from the excitement +among them, it was easy to perceive that their success had been fully +equal to their expectations. They were fourteen in number, seated +round a table, not indifferently covered with the good things of this +life; they were clad in theatrical costume, which, with the rapid +circulation of the bottle, gave the whole scene an air of romantic +freedom, calculated to interest the mind of a thoughtless half-pay +midshipman. + +Being hungry after my walk, I determined to join the party at supper, +which, being a _table d'hôte_ was easily effected. One of the +actresses, a sweet little, well-proportioned creature, with large +black eyes, was receiving, with apparent indifference, the compliments +of the better sort of bumpkins and young farmers of the neighbourhood. +In her momentary and occasional smiles, she discovered a beautiful set +of small, white teeth; but when she resumed her pensive attitude, +I was sensible of an enchanting air of melancholy, which deeply +interested me in favour of this poor girl, who was evidently in a +lower situation in life than that for which she had been educated. The +person who sat nearest to her vacated his seat as soon as he found his +attentions were thrown away. I instantly took possession of the place, +and, observing the greatest respect, entered at once into conversation +with her. + +Whether she was pleased with my address and language, as being +superior to what she was usually compelled to listen to, or whether +she was flattered by my assiduous attention, I know not; but she +gradually unbent, and became more animated; showing great natural +talent and a highly-cultivated mind; so that I was every moment more +astonished to find her in such a situation. + +Our conversation had lasted a considerable time; and I had just made +a remark to which she had not replied, apparently struggling with +concealed emotion, when we were interrupted by a carriage driving up +to the door, and cries of "Help! help!" I instantly quitted the side +of my new acquaintance, and flew to answer the signal of distress. + +A gentleman in the carriage was supporting a young lady in his arms, +to all appearance lifeless. With my assistance, she was speedily +removed into the house, and conveyed to a bedroom. A surgeon was sent +for, but none was to be had; the only practitioner of the town being +at that moment gone to attend one of those cases which, according +to Mr Malthus, are much too frequent for the good of the country. I +discovered that the carriage had been overturned, and that the young +lady had been insensible ever since. + +There was no time to be lost; I knew that immediate bleeding was +absolutely necessary. I had acquired thus much of surgical knowledge +in the course of my professional duties. I stated my opinion to the +gentleman; and although my practice had been very slight, offered my +services to perform the operation. This offer was accepted with +thanks by the grateful father, for such I found he was. With my sharp +penknife I opened a vein in one of the whitest arms I ever beheld. +After a few moments' chafing, the blood flowed more freely; the pulse +indicated returning animation; a pair of large blue eyes opened +suddenly upon me like a masked battery; and so alarmingly susceptible +was I of the tender passion, that I quite forgot the little actress +whom I had left at the supper-table, and who, a few minutes before, +had occupied my whole thoughts and attention. + +Having succeeded in restoring the fair patient to consciousness, I +prescribed a warm bed, some tea, and careful watching. My orders were +punctually obeyed; I then quitted the apartment of my patient, and +began to ruminate over the hurried and singular events of the day. + +I had scarcely had time to decide in my own mind on the respective +merits of my two rival beauties when the surgeon arrived; and, being +ushered into the sick-room, declared that the patient had been treated +with skill, and that in all probability she owed her life to my +presence of mind. "But, give me leave to ask," said the doctor, +addressing the father, "how the accident happened?" The gentleman +replied that a scoundrel having got up behind the carriage, had been +flogged off by the postilion; and, in revenge, had thrown a stone, +which knocked the driver off his horse: they took fright, turned +round, and ran away down the hill towards their own stables; and after +running five miles, upset the carriage against a post, "by which +accident," said he, "my poor daughter was nearly killed." + +"What a villain!" said the doctor. + +"Villain, indeed," echoed I; and so I felt I was. I turned sick at the +thought of what my ungoverned passion had done; and my regret was +not a little increased by the charms of my lovely victim; but I soon +recovered from the shock, particularly when I saw that no suspicion +attached to me. I therefore received the praises of the father and the +doctor with a becoming modest diffidence; and, with a hearty shake of +the hand from the grateful parent, was wished a good night and retired +to my bed. + +As I stood before the looking-glass, laying my watch and exhausted +purse on the dressing-table, and leisurely untying my cravat, I could +not forbear a glance of approbation at what I thought a very handsome +and a very impudent face: I soliloquised on the events of the day, +and, as usual, found the summing-up very much against me. "This, then, +sir," said I, "is your road to repentance and reform. You insult your +father; quit his house; get up, like a vagabond, behind a gentleman's +carriage; are flogged off, break the ribs of an honest man, who has a +wife and family to support out of his hard earnings--are the occasion +of a carriage being overturned, and very nearly cause the death of an +amiable girl! And all this mischief in the short space of six hours, +not to say a word of your intentions towards the little actress, which +I presume are none of the most honourable. Where is all this to end?" + +"At the gallows," said I, in reply to myself,--"the more probably, +too, as my finances have no means of improvement, except by a miracle +or highway robbery. I am in love with two girls, and have only two +clean shirts; consequently there is no proportion between the demand +and the supply." + +With this medley of reflections I fell asleep. I was awoke early by +the swallows twittering at the windows; and the first question which +was agitated in my brain was what account I should give of myself to +the father of the young lady, when interrogated by him, as I most +certainly should be. I had my choice between truth and falsehood: the +latter (such is the force of habit), I think, carried it hollow; but +I determined to leave that point to the spur of the moment, and act +according to circumstances. + +My meditations were interrupted by the chambermaid, who, tapping at my +door, said she came to tell me "that the gentleman that _belonged_ to +the young lady that I was so kind to, was waiting breakfast for me." + +The thought of sitting at table with the dear creature whose brains I +had so nearly spilled upon the road the night before quite overcame +me; and leaving the fabric of my history to chance or to inspiration, +I darted from my bedroom to the parlour, where the stranger awaited +me. He received me with great cordiality, again expressed his +obligations, and informed me that his name was Somerville, of ----. + +I had some faint recollection of having heard the name mentioned by my +father, and was endeavouring to recall to mind on what occasion, when +Mr Somerville interrupted me by saying, that he hoped he should have +the pleasure of knowing the name of the young gentleman who had +conferred such an obligation upon him. I answered that my name was +Mildmay; for I had no time to tell a lie. + +"I should be happy to think," said he, "that you were the son of my +old friend and school-fellow, Mr Mildmay, of ----; but that cannot +well be," said he, "for he had only two sons--one at college, the +other as brave a sailor as ever lived, and now in the Mediterranean: +but perhaps you are some relation of his?" + +He had just concluded this speech, and before I had time to reply to +it, the door opened, and Miss Somerville entered. We have all heard a +great deal about "love at first sight;" but I contend that the man who +would not, at the very first glimpse of Emily Somerville, have fallen +desperately in love with her, could have had neither heart nor soul. +If I thought her lovely when she lay in a state of insensibility, what +did I think of her when her form had assumed its wonted animation, and +her cheeks their natural colour? To describe a perfect beauty never +was my forte. I can only say, that Miss Somerville, as far as I am +a judge, united in her person all the component parts of the finest +specimen of her sex in England; and these were joined in such harmony +by the skilful hand of Nature, that I was ready to kneel down and +adore her. + +As she extended her white hand to me, and thanked me for my kindness, +I was so taken aback with the sudden appearance and address of this +beautiful vision, that I knew not what to say. I stammered out +something, but have no recollection whether it was French or English. +I lost my presence of mind, and the blushes of conscious guilt on +my face at that moment, might have been mistaken for those of +unsophisticated innocence. That these external demonstrations are +often confounded, and that such was the case on the present occasion, +there can be no doubt. My embarrassment was ascribed to that modesty +ever attendant on real worth. + +It has been said that true merit blushes at being discovered; but I +have lived to see merit that could not blush, and the want of it that +could, while the latter has marched off with all the honours due to +the former. The blush that burned on my cheek, at that moment, would +have gone far to have condemned a criminal at the Old Bailey; but in +the countenance of a handsome young man was received as the unfailing +marks of "a pure ingenuous soul." + +I had been too long at school to be ashamed of wearing laurels I had +never won; and, having often received a flogging which I did not +deserve, I thought myself equally well entitled to any advantages +which the chances of war might throw in my way; so having set my +tender conscience at rest, I sat myself down between my new mistress +and her father, and made a most delightful breakfast. Miss Somerville, +although declared out of danger by the doctor, was still languid, but +able to continue her journey; and as they had not many miles further +to go, Mr Somerville proposed a delay of an hour or two. + +Breakfast ended, he quitted the room to arrange for their departure, +and I found myself _tête-à-tête_ with the young lady. During this +short absence, I found out that she was an only daughter, and that her +mother was dead; she again introduced the subject of my family name, +and I found also that before Mrs Somerville's death, my father had +been on terms of great intimacy with Emily's parents. I had not +replied to Mr Somerville's question. A similar one was now asked by +his daughter; and so closely was I interrogated by her coral lips and +searching blue eyes, that I could not tell a lie. It would have been a +horrid aggravation of guilt, so I honestly owned that I was the son of +her father's friend, Mr Mildmay. + +"Good heaven!" said she, "why had you not told my father so?" + +"Because I must have said a great deal more; besides," added I, making +her my confidante. "I am the midshipman whom Mr Somerville supposes to +be in the Mediterranean, and I ran away from my father's house last +night." + +Although I was as concise as possible in my story, I had not finished +before Mr Somerville came in. + +"Oh, papa," said his daughter, "this young gentleman is Frank Mildmay, +after all." + +I gave her a reproachful glance for having betrayed my secret; her +father was astonished--she looked confused, and so did I. + +Nothing now remained for me but an open and candid confession, taking +especial care, however, to conceal the part I had acted in throwing +the stone. Mr Somerville reproved me very sharply, which I thought was +taking a great liberty; but he softened it down by adding, "If you +knew how dear the interests of your family are to me, you would not be +surprised at my assuming the tone of a parent." I looked at Emily, and +pocketed the affront. + +"And, Frank," pursued he, "when I tell you, that, although the +distance between your father's property and mine has in some measure +interrupted our long intimacy, I have been watching your career in the +service with interest, you will, perhaps, take my advice, and return +home. Do not let me have to regret that one to whom I am under such +obligations should be too proud to acknowledge a fault. I admire a +high spirit in a good cause: but towards a parent it can never be +justified. It may be unpleasant to you; but I will prepare the way by +writing to your father: and do you stay here till you hear from me. I +should wish for the pleasure of your company at ---- Hall; but your +father has prior claims; and I hardly need tell you, that once +restored and reconciled to him, I expect as long a visit as you can +afford to pay me. Think on what I have said; and, in the meantime, as +I daresay your finances are not very flourishing"--(thinks I, you are +a witch!)--"allow me to leave this ten-pound note in your hands." +This part of his request was much more readily complied with than the +other. + +He left the room, as he said, to pay the bill; but I believe it was +to give his fair daughter an opportunity of trying the effect of +her eloquence on my proud spirit, which gave no great promise of +concession. A few minutes with _her_, did more than both the fathers +could have effected, the most powerful motive to submission being +the certainty that I could not visit at her father's house until a +reconciliation had taken place between me and mine. I therefore told +her that, at her solicitation, I would submit to any liberal terms. + +This being agreed to, her father observed that the carriage was at the +door, shook hands with me, and led his lovely daughter away, whose +last nod and parting look confirmed all my good resolutions. + +Reader, whatever you may think of the trifling incidents of the last +twenty-four hours, you will find that they involved consequences of +vast importance to the writer of this memoir. Pride induced me to quit +my father's house; revenge stimulated me to an act which brought the +heroine of this story on the stage, for such will Emily Somerville +prove to be. But, alas! by what fatal infatuation was Mr Somerville +induced to leave me my own master at an inn, with ten pounds in my +pocket, instead of taking me with him to his own residence, and +keeping me till he had heard from my father? The wisest men often err +in points which at first appear of trivial importance, but which prove +in the sequel to have been fraught with evil. + +Left to myself, I ruminated for some time on what had occurred; and +the beautiful Emily Somerville having vanished from my sight, I +recollected the little fascinating actress from whom I had so suddenly +parted on the preceding night; still I must say, that I was so much +occupied with the charms of her successor, that I sought the society +of the youthful Melpomene more with a view to beguile the time, than +from any serious prepossession. + +I found her in the large room, where they were all assembled. She +received me as a friend, and evinced a partiality which flattered +my vanity. In three days, I received a letter from Mr Somerville, +inclosing one from my father, whose only request was, that I would +return home, and meet him as if nothing unpleasant had occurred. This +I determined to do; but I had now been so long in the company of +Eugenia (for that was the actress's name), that I could not very +easily part with her. In fact, I was desperately in love, after my +fashion; and though perhaps I could not with truth say the same +of her, yet that she was partial to my company was evident. I had +obtained from her the history of her life, which, in the following +chapter, I shall give in her own words. + + + + +Chapter X + + She is virtuous, though bred behind the scenes: and, whatever + pleasure she may feel in seeing herself applauded on the stage, + she would much rather pass for a modest girl, than for a good + actress.--_Gil Blas_. + + +"My father," said Eugenia, "was at the head of this company of +strolling players; my mother was a young lady of respectable family, +at a boarding-school. She took a fancy to my father in the character +of 'Rolla'; and, being of course deservedly forsaken by her friends, +became a prima donna. I was the only fruits of this connection, and +the only solace of my mother in her affliction; for she bitterly +repented the rash step she had taken. + +"At five years old, my father proposed that I should take the +character of Cupid, in the opera of Telemaque. To this my mother +strongly objected, declaring that I never should go upon the stage; +and this created a disunion which was daily embittered by my father's +unkind treatment both of my mother and myself. I never left her side +for fear of a kick, which I was sure to receive when I had not her +protection. She employed all her spare time in my instruction, and, +notwithstanding the folly she had been guilty of, she was fully +competent to the task. + +"When I was seven years old, a relation of my mother died, and +bequeathed fifteen thousand pounds, to be equally divided between her +and her two sisters, securing my mother's portion in such a manner as +to prevent my father having any control over it. As soon as my mother +obtained this information, she quitted my father, who was too prudent +to spend either his time or his money in pursuit of her. Had he +been aware of her sudden change of fortune, he might have acted +differently. + +"We arrived in London, took possession of the property, which was all +in the funds; and then, fearing my father might gain information of +her wealth, my mother set off for France, taking me with her. There I +passed the happiest days of my life; my mother spared no pains, and +went to considerable expense in my education. The best masters were +provided for me in singing, dancing, and music; and so much did I +profit by their instruction, that I was very soon considered a pretty +specimen of my countrywomen, and much noticed accordingly. + +"From France we went to Italy, where we remained two years, and where +my vocal education was completed. My poor mother lived all this time +on the principal of her fortune, concluding it would last for ever. +At last she was taken ill of a fever, and died. This was about a year +ago, when I was only sixteen. Delirious many days before her death, +she could give me no instructions as to my future conduct, or where +to apply for resources. I happened, however, to know her banker in +London, and wrote to him immediately; in answer, he informed me that a +balance of forty pounds was all that remained in his hands. + +"I believe he cheated me, but I could not help it. My spirits were +not depressed at this news; I sold all the furniture; paid the little +debts to the tradespeople, and, with nine pounds in my pocket, took +my place in the diligence, and set off for London, where I arrived +without accident. I read in the newspaper, at the inn, that a +provincial company was in want of a young actress for genteel comedy. +My mother's original passion for the stage had never left her; and, +during our stay in France, we often amused ourselves with _la petite +comédie_, in which I always took a part. + +"Without resources, I thought a precarious mode of obtaining a +livelihood was better than a vicious one, and determined to try my +fortune on the stage: so I ordered a hack, and drove to the office +indicated. I felt a degree of comfort, when I discovered that my +father was the advertising manager, although I was certain he would +never recognise me. I was engaged by the agent, the bargain was +approved of, and in a day or two after, was ordered to a country town, +some miles from the metropolis. + +"I arrived; my father did not know me, nor did I wish that he should, +as I did not intend to remain long in the company. I short, I aspired +to the London boards; but aware that I wanted practice, without which +it would have been useless to have offered myself, I accepted this +situation without delay, and applied with great assiduity to the +study of my profession. My father, I found, had married again; and +my joining the company added nothing to his domestic harmony, my +stepmother becoming immoderately jealous of me; but I took good care +to keep my own secret, and never exposed myself for one moment to any +suspicion of my character, which hitherto, thank Heaven, has been +pure, though I am exposed to a thousand temptations, and beset by the +actors to become the wife of one, or the mistress of another. + +"Among those who proposed the latter, was my honoured father, to whom, +on that account, I was one day on the point of revealing the secret of +my birth, as the only means of saving myself from his importunities. +He was, at last, taken ill, and died, only three months ago, not +before I had completed my engagements, and obtained an increased +salary of one guinea and a half per week. It is my intention to quit +the company at the expiration of my present term, which will take +place in two months, for I am miserable here, although I am quite at a +loss to know what will be my future destination." + +In return for her confidence, I imparted as much of my history as I +thought it necessary for her to know. I became deeply fascinated--I +forgot Miss Somerville, and answered my father's letter respectfully +and kindly. He informed me that he had procured my name to be entered +on the books of the guard-ship, at Spithead: but, that I might gain +time to loiter by the side of Eugenia, I begged his permission to join +my ship without returning home, alleging as a reason, that delay would +soften down any asperity of feeling occasioned by the late fracas. +This in his answer he agreed to, enclosing a handsome remittance; and +the same post brought a pressing invitation from Mr Somerville to come +to ---- Hall. + +My little actress informed me that the company would set out in two +days for the neighbourhood of Portsmouth; and, as I found that they +would be more than a fortnight in travelling, I determined to accept +the invitation, and quit her for the present. I had been more than a +week in her society. At parting, I professed my admiration and love. +Silence and a starting tear were her only acknowledgment. I saw that +she was not displeased; and I left her with joyful anticipations. + +But what did I anticipate, as I rolled heedlessly along in the +chaise to ---- Hall? Sensual gratification at the expense of a poor +defenceless orphan, whose future life would be clouded with misery. +I could see my wickedness, and moralise upon it; but the devil was +triumphant within me, and I consoled myself with the vulgar adage, +"Needs must when the devil drives." With this, I dismissed the subject +to think of Emily, whose residence was now in sight. + +I arrived at ---- Hall, was kindly received and welcomed by both +father and daughter; but on this visit, I must not dwell. When I +reflect on it, I hate myself and human nature! Could I be trusted? yet +I inspired unbounded confidence. Was I not as vicious as one of my +age could be? Yet I made them believe I was almost perfection. Did I +deserve to be happy? Yet I was so, and more so than I had ever been +before or ever have been since. I was like the serpent in Eden, though +without his vile intentions. Beauty and virtue united to keep my +passions in subjection. When they had nothing to feed on, they +concealed themselves in the inmost recesses of my bosom. + +Had I remained always with Emily, I should have been reclaimed; but +when I quitted her, I lost all my good feelings and good resolutions; +not, however, before the bright image of virtue had lighted up in +my bosom a holy flame which has never been entirely extinguished. +Occasionally dimmed, it has afterwards burnt up with renewed +brightness; and, as a beacon-light, has often guided me through perils +that might have overwhelmed me. + +Compelled at last to quit this earthly paradise, I told her, at +parting, that I loved her, adored her; and to prove that I was in +earnest, and that she believed me, I obtained a lock of her hair. When +I left ---- Hall, it was my intention to have joined my ship, as I had +agreed with my father; but the temptation to follow up my success with +the fair and unfortunate Eugenia was too strong to be resisted; at +least I thought so, and therefore hardly made an effort to conquer it. +True I did, _pro formâ_, make my appearance on board the guard-ship, +had my name entered on the books, that I might not lose my time of +servitude, and that I might also deceive my father. All this being +duly accomplished, I obtained leave of absence from my first +lieutenant, an old acquaintance, who, in a ship crowded with +supernumerary midshipmen, was but too happy in getting rid of me and +my chest. + +I hastened to the rendezvous, and found the company in full activity. +Eugenia, when we parted, expressed a wish that our acquaintance might +not be renewed. She feared for her own character as well as mine, and +very sensibly and feelingly observed that my professional prospects +might be blasted; but, having made up my mind, I had an answer for all +her objections. I presented myself to the manager, and requested to be +admitted into the company. + +Having taken this step, Eugenia saw that my attachment was not to be +overcome; that I was willing to make any sacrifice for her. I was +accepted; my salary was fixed at one guinea per week, with seven +shillings extra for playing the flute. I was indebted for my ready +admission into this society to my voice: the manager wanted a first +singer. My talent in this science was much admired. I signed my +agreement the same evening for two months; and, being presented in +due form to my brethren of the buskin, joined the supper-table, where +there was more of abundance than of delicacies. I sat by Eugenia, +whose decided preference for me excited the jealousy of my new +associates. I measured them all with my eye, and calculated that, with +fair play, I was the best man among them. + +The play-bills announced the tragedy of "Romeo and Juliet." I was to +be the hero, and four days were allowed me to prepare myself. The +whole of that time was passed in the company of Eugenia, who, while +she gave me unequivocal proofs of attachment, admitted of no freedom. +The day of rehearsal arrived, I was found perfect, and loudly +applauded by the company. Six o'clock came, the curtain rose, and +sixteen tallow candles displayed my person to an audience of about one +hundred people. + +No one who has not been in the situation can form any idea of the +nervous feeling of a _débutant_ on such an occasion. The troupe, with +the exception of Eugenia, was of a description of persons whom I +despise, and the audience mostly clodhoppers, who could scarcely read +or write; yet I was abashed, and acquitted myself badly, until the +balcony scene, when I became enlivened and invigorated by the presence +and smiles of my mistress. In the art of love-making I was at home, +particularly with the Juliet of that night. I entered at once into the +spirit of the great dramatist, and the curtain dropped amidst thunders +of applause. My name was announced for a repetition of the play, and +I was dragged forward before the curtain, to thank the grocers, +tallow-chandlers, cheesemongers, and ploughmen for the great honour +they had done me. Heavens! how I felt the degradation; but it was too +late. + +The natural result of this constant intercourse with Eugenia may +easily be anticipated. I do not attempt to extenuate my fault--it was +inexcusable, and has brought its punishment; but for poor, forlorn +Eugenia I plead; her virtue fell before my importunity and my personal +appearance. She fell a victim to those unhappy circumstances of which +I basely took the advantage. + +Two months I had lived with her, as man and wife; I forgot my family, +profession, and even Emily. I was now upon the ship's books; and +though no one knew anything of me, my father was ignorant of my +absence from the ship--everything was sacrificed to Eugenia. I acted +with her, strolled the fields, and vowed volumes of stuff about +constancy. When we played, we filled the house; and some of the more +respectable townspeople offered to introduce us to the London boards, +but this we both declined. We cared for nothing but the society of +each other. + +And now that time has cooled the youthful ardour that carried me away +let me do justice to this unfortunate girl. She was the most natural, +unaffected and gifted person I ever met with. Boundless wit, +enchanting liveliness, a strong mind, and self-devotion towards me, +the first, and, I firmly believe, the only object she ever loved; and +her love for me ceased only with her life. Her faults, though not to +be defended, may be palliated and deplored, because they were the +defects of education. Her infant days were passed in scenes of +domestic strife, profligacy, and penury; her maturer years, under +the guidance of a weak mother, were employed in polishing, not +strengthening, the edifice of her understanding, and the external +ornaments only served to accelerate the fall of the fabric, and to +increase the calamity. + +Bred up in France, and almost in the fervour of the Revolution, +she had imbibed some of its libertine opinions; among others, that +marriage was a civil contract, and if entered into at all, might be +broken at the pleasure of either party. This idea was strengthened and +confirmed in her by the instances she had seen of matrimonial discord, +particularly in her own family. When two people, who fancied they +loved, had bound themselves by an indissoluble knot, they felt from +that time the irksomeness of restraint, which they would never have +felt if they had possessed the power of separation; and would have +lived happily together if they had not been compelled to do it. "How +long you, my dear Frank," said Eugenia to me one day, "may continue +to love me, I know not; but the moment you cease to love me, it were +better that we parted." + +These were certainly the sentiments of an enthusiast; but Eugenia +lived long enough to acknowledge her error, and to bewail its fatal +effects on her peace of mind. + +I was awoke from this dream of happiness by a curious incident. I +thought it disastrous at the time, but am now convinced that it was +fraught with good, since it brought me back to my profession, recalled +me to a sense of duty, and showed me the full extent of my disgraceful +situation. My father, it appears, was still ignorant of my absence +from my ship, and had come down, without my knowledge, on a visit to +a friend in the neighbourhood. Hearing of "the interesting young man" +who had acquired so much credit in the character of Apollo, as well as +of Romeo, he was persuaded to see the performance. + +I was in the act of singing "Pray Goody," when my eyes suddenly met +those of my papa, who was staring like the head of Gorgon; and though +his gaze did not turn me to stone, it turned me sick. I was stupified, +forgot my part, ran off, and left the manager and the music to make +the best of it. My father, who could hardly believe his eyes, was +convinced when he saw my confusion. I ran into the dressing-room, +where, before I had time to divest myself of Apollo's crown and +petticoat, I was accosted by my enraged parent, and it is quite +impossible for me to describe (taking my costume into consideration) +how very much like a fool I looked. + +My father sternly demanded how long I had been thus honourably +employed. This was a question which I had anticipated, and, therefore, +very readily replied "Only two or three days;" that I had left +Portsmouth for what we called "a lark," and I thought it very amusing. + +"Very amusing, indeed, sir," said my father; "and pray, may I venture +to inquire, without the fear of having a lie told me, how long this +'lark,' as you call it, is to continue?" + +"Oh, to-morrow," said I, "my leave expires, and then I must return to +my ship." + +"Allow me the honour of keeping your company," said my father; "and I +shall beg your captain to impose some little restraint as to time and +distance on your future excursions." + +Then rising in his tone, he added, "I am ashamed of you, sir; the son +of a gentleman is not likely to reap any advantage from the society of +strolling vagabonds and prostitutes. I had reason to think, by +your last letters from Portsmouth, that you were very differently +employed." + +To this very sensible and parental reproof I answered, with a demure +and innocent countenance (for I soon regained my presence of mind) +that I did not think there had been any harm in doing that which most +of the officers of the navy did at one time or another (an assertion, +by-the-by, much too general); that we often got up plays on board of +ship, and that I wanted to practise. + +"Practise, then with your equals," said my father, "not in company +with rogues and street-walkers." + +I felt that the latter name was meant for Eugenia, and was very +indignant; but fortunately kept all my anger within board, and, +knowing I was "all in the wrong," allowed my father to fire away +without returning a shot. He concluded his lecture by commanding me to +call upon him the next morning, at ten o'clock, and left me to change +my dress, and to regain my good humour. I need not add that I did not +return to the stage that night, but left the manager to make his peace +with the audience in any way he thought proper. + +When I informed Eugenia of the evening's adventure, she was +inconsolable: to comfort her, I offered to give up my family and +my profession, and live with her. At these words, Eugenia suddenly +recollected herself. "Frank," said she, "all that has happened is +right. We are both wrong. I felt that I was too happy, and shut my +eyes to the danger I dared not face. Your father is a man of sense; +his object is to reclaim you from inevitable ruin. As for me, if he +knew of our connection, he could only despise me. He sees his son +living with strolling players; and it is his duty to cut the chain, no +matter by what means. You have an honourable and distinguished career +marked out for you; I will never be an obstacle to your father's just +ambition or your prosperity. I did hope for a happier destiny; but +love blinded my eyes: I am now undeceived. If your father cannot +respect me, he shall at least admire the resolution of the unhappy +Eugenia. I have tenderly loved you, my dearest Frank, and never have +loved any other, nor ever shall; but part we must: Heaven only knows +for how long a time. I am ready to make every sacrifice to your fame +and character--the only proof I can give of my unbounded love for +you." + +I embraced her as she uttered these words; and we spent a great part +of the night in making preparations for my departure, arrangements for +our future correspondence, and, if possible, for our future meetings. +I left her early on the following morning; and with a heavy, I had +almost said, a broken heart, appeared before my father. He was, no +doubt, aware of my attachment and the violence of my passions, and +prudently endeavoured to soothe them. He received me affectionately, +did not renew the subject of the preceding night, and we became very +good friends. + +In tearing myself away from Eugenia, I found the truth of the French +adage, "_Ce n'est que la première pas qui coûte_;" my heart grew +lighter as I increased my distance from her. My father, to detach my +mind still more from the unfortunate subject, spoke much of family +affairs, of my brother and sisters, and lastly named Mr Somerville and +Emily: here he touched on the right chord. The remembrance of Emily +revived the expiring embers of virtue; and the recollection of the +pure and perfect mistress of ---- Hall, for a time, dismissed the +unhappy Eugenia from my mind. I told my father that I would engage +never to disgrace him or myself any more, if he would promise not to +name my late folly to Mr Somerville or his daughter. + +"That," said my father, "I promise most readily; and with the greater +pleasure, since I see, in your request, the strongest proof of the +sense of your error." + +This conversation passed on our road to Portsmouth, where we had +no sooner arrived than my father, who was acquainted with the +port-admiral, left me at the "George," while he crossed the street to +call on him. The result of this interview was that I should be sent +out immediately in some sea-going ship with a "tight captain." + +There was one of this description just about to sail for Basque Roads; +and, at the admiral's particular request, I was received on board as a +supernumerary, there being no vacancies in the ship. My father, who by +this time was wide awake to all my wiles, saw me on board; and then +flattering himself that I was in safe custody, took his leave and +returned to the shore. I very soon found that I was under an embargo, +and was not on any account to be allowed leave of absence. + +This was pretty nearly what I expected; but I had my own resources. +I had now learned to laugh at trifles, and I cared little about this +decided step which his prudence induced him to take. + + + + +Chapter XI + + "Our boat has one sail, + And the helmsman is pale; + A bold pilot, I trow + Who should follow us now," + Shouted he. + As he spoke, bolts of death + Speck'd their path o'er the sea. + "And fear'st thou, and fear'st thou? + And see'st thou, and hear'st thou? + And drive we not free + O'er the terrible sea, + I and thou?" + + SHELLEY. + + +The reader may think I was over fastidious when I inform him that +I cannot describe the disgust I felt at the licentious impurity of +manners which I found in the midshipmen's berth; for although my +connection with Eugenia was not sanctioned by religion or morality, +it was in other respects pure, disinterested, and, if I may use the +expression, patriarchal, since it was unsullied by inconstancy, gross +language, or drunkenness. Vicious I was, and I own it to my shame; but +at least my vice was refined by Eugenia, who had no fault but one. + +As soon as I had settled myself in my new abode, with all the comfort +that circumstances would permit, I wrote a long letter to Eugenia, +in which I gave an exact account of all that had passed since our +separation; I begged her to come down to Portsmouth and see me; +told her to go to the "Star and Garter," as the house nearest the +water-side, and consequently where I should be the soonest out of +sight after I had landed. Her answer informed me that she should be +there on the following day. + +The only difficulty now was to get on shore. No eloquence of mine, I +was sure, would induce the first lieutenant to relax his Cerberus-like +guard over me. I tried the experiment, however; begged very hard "to +be allowed to go on shore to procure certain articles absolutely +necessary to my comfort." + +"No, no," said Mr Talbot, "I am too old a hand to be caught that way. +I have my orders, and I would not let my father go on shore, if the +captain ordered me to keep him on board; and I tell you, in perfect +good humour, that out of this ship you do not go, unless you swim on +shore, and that I do not think you will attempt. Here," continued +he, "to prove to you there is no ill-will on my part, here is the +captain's note." + +It was short, sweet, and complimentary, as it related to myself, and +was as follows:-- + +"Keep that d----d young scamp, Mildmay, on board." + +"Will you allow me, then," said I, folding up the note, and returning +it to him without any comment, "will you allow me to go on shore under +the charge of the sergeant of marines?" + +"That," said he, "would be just as much an infringement of my orders +as letting you go by yourself. You cannot go on shore, sir." + +These last words he uttered in a very peremptory manner, and, quitting +the deck, left me to my own reflections and my own resources. + +Intercourse by letter between Eugenia and myself was perfectly easy; +but that was not all I wanted. I had promised to meet her at nine +o'clock in the evening. It was now sunset; the boats were all hoisted +up; no shore boat was near, and there was no mode of conveyance but _à +la nage_, which Mr Talbot himself had suggested only as proving its +utter impracticability; but he did not know me half so well at the +time as he did afterwards. + +The ship lay two miles from the shore, the wind was from the +south-west, and the tide moving to the eastward; so that, with wind +and tide both in my favour, I calculated on fetching South Sea Castle. +After dark I took my station in the fore-channels. It was the 20th of +March, and very cold. I undressed myself, made all my clothes up into +a very tight bundle, and fastened them on my hat, which retained its +proper position; then, lowering myself very gently into the water, +like another Leander I struck out to gain the arms of my Hero. + +Before I had got twenty yards from the ship, I was perceived by the +sentinel, who, naturally supposing I was a pressed man endeavouring to +escape, hailed me to come back. Not being obeyed, the officer of the +watch ordered him to fire at me. A ball whizzed over my head, and +struck the water between my hands. A dozen more followed, all of them +tolerably well directed; but I struck out, and the friendly shades of +night, and increasing distance from the ship, soon protected me. A +waterman, seeing the flashes and hearing the reports of the muskets, +concluded that he might chance to pick up a fare. He pulled towards +me, I hailed him, and he took me in, before I had got half a quarter +of a mile from the ship. + +"I doubt whether you would ever have fetched the shore on that tack, +my lad," said the old man. "You left your ship two hours too soon: you +would have met the ebb-tide running strong out of the harbour; and the +first thing you would have made, if you could have kept up your head +above water, would have been the Ower's." + +While the old man was pulling and talking, I was shivering and +dressing, and made no reply; but begged him to put me on shore on the +first part of South Sea Beach he could land at, which he did. I gave +him a guinea, and ran, without stopping, into the garrison, and down +Point Street to the Star and Garter, where I was received by Eugenia, +who, with great presence of mind, called me her "_dear, dear_ +husband!" in the hearing of the people of the house. My wet clothes +attracted her notice. I told her what I had done to obtain an +interview with her. She shuddered with horror!--my teeth chattered +with cold. A good fire, a hot and not very weak glass of +brandy-and-water, together with her tears, smiles, and caresses, soon +restored me.--The reader will, no doubt, here recall to mind the +less agreeable remedy applied to me when I ducked the usher, and one +recommended also by myself in similar cases, as having experienced its +good effects: how much more I deserved it on this occasion than the +former one, need not be mentioned. + +So sweet was this stolen interview, that I vowed I was ready to +encounter the same danger on the succeeding night. Our conversation +turned on our future prospects; and, as our time was short, we had +much to say. + +"Frank," said the poor girl, "before we meet again, I shall probably +be a mother; and this hope alone alleviates the agony of separation. +If I have not you, I shall, at least, be blest with your image. Heaven +grant that it may be a boy, to follow the steps of his father, and not +a girl, to be as wretched as her mother. You, my dear Frank, are going +on distant and dangerous service--dangers increased tenfold by the +natural ardour of your mind: we may never meet again, or if we do, +the period will be far distant. I ever have been, and ever will be +constant to you, till death; but I neither expect, nor will allow of +the same declaration on your part. Other scenes, new faces, youthful +passions will combine to drive me for a time from your thoughts, and +when you shall have attained maturer years, and a rank in the navy +equal to your merits and your connections, you will marry in your own +sphere of society; all these things I have made up my mind to, as +events that must take place. Your person I know I cannot have--but do +not, do not discard me from your mind. I shall never be jealous as +long as I know you are happy, and still love your unfortunate Eugenia. +Your child shall be no burthen to you until it shall have attained an +age at which it may be put out in the world: then, I know you will not +desert it for the sake of its mother. Dear Frank, my heart is broken; +but you are not to blame; and if you were, I would die imploring +blessings on your head." Here she wept bitterly. + +I tried every means in my power to comfort and encourage this +fascinating and extraordinary girl; I forgot neither vows nor +promises, which, at the time, I fully intended to perform. I promised +her a speedy and I trusted a happy meeting. + +"God's will be done," said she, "come what will. And now, my dearest +Frank, farewell--never again endanger your life and character for me +as you did last night. I have been blest in your society, and even +with the prospect of misery before me, cannot regret the past." + +I tenderly embraced her, jumped into a wherry, at Point, and desired +the waterman to take me on board the _I_----, at Spithead. The first +lieutenant was on deck when I came up the side. + +"I presume it was you whom we fired at last night?" said he, smiling. + +"It was, sir," said I; "absolute necessity compelled me to go on +shore, or I should not have taken such an extraordinary mode of +conveyance." + +"Oh, with all my heart," said the officer; "had you told me you +intended to have swum on shore, I should not have prevented you; I +took you for one of the pressed men, and directed the marines to fire +at you." + +"The pressed men are extremely obliged to you," thought I. + +"Did you not find it devilish cold?" continued the lieutenant, in a +strain of good humour, which I encouraged by my manner of answering. + +"Indeed I did, sir," said I. + +"And the jollies fired tolerably well, did they?" + +"They did, sir; would they had had a _better mark_." + +"I understand you," said the lieutenant; "but as you have not served +your time, the vacancy would be of no use to you. I must report the +affair to the captain, though I do not think he will take any notice +of it; he is too fond of enterprise himself to check it in others. +Besides, a lady is always a justifiable object, but we hope soon to +show you some higher game." + +The captain came on board shortly after, and took no notice of my +having been absent without leave; he made some remark as he glanced +his eye at me, which I afterwards learned was in my favour. In a few +days we sailed, and arrived in a few more in Basque Roads. The British +fleet was at anchor outside the French ships moored in a line off the +Isle d'Aix. The ship I belonged to had an active part in the work +going on, and most of us saw more than we chose to speak of; but +as much ill-blood was made on that occasion, and one or two very +unpleasant courts-martial took place, I shall endeavour to confine +myself to my own personal narrative, avoiding anything that may give +offence to the parties concerned. Some days were passed in preparing +the fire-ships; and on the night of the 11th April, 1809, everything +being prepared for the attempt to destroy the enemy's squadron, we +began the attack. A more daring one was never made; and if it partly +failed of success, no fault could be imputed to those who conducted +the enterprise: they did all that man could do. + +The night was very dark, and it blew a strong breeze directly in upon +the Isle d'Aix, and the enemy's fleet. Two of our frigates had been +previously so placed as to serve as beacons to direct the course of +the fire-ships. They each displayed a clear and brilliant light; the +fire-ships were directed to pass between these; after which, their +course up to the boom which guarded the anchorage, was clear, and not +easily to be mistaken. + +I solicited, and obtained permission to go on board one of the +explosion vessels that were to precede the fire-ships. They were +filled with layers of shells and powder, heaped one upon another: the +quantity on board of each vessel was enormous. Another officer, three +seamen, and myself, were all that were on board of her. We had a +four-oared gig, a small narrow thing (nick-named by the sailors a +"coffin"), to make our escape in. + +Being quite prepared, we started. It was a fearful moment; the wind +freshened, and whistled through our rigging, and the night was so +dark, that we could not see our bowsprit. We had only our foresail +set; but with a strong flood-tide and a fair wind, with plenty of it, +we passed between the advanced frigates like an arrow. It seemed to me +like entering the gates of hell. As we flew rapidly along, and our +own ships disappeared in the intense darkness, I thought of Dante's +inscription over the portals:--"You who enter here, leave hope +behind." + +Our orders were to lay the vessel on the boom which the French had +moored to the outer anchors of their ships of the line. In a few +minutes after passing the frigates we were close to it; our boat was +towing astern, with three men in it--one to hold the rope ready to let +go, one to steer, and one to bale the water out, which, from our rapid +motion, would otherwise have swamped her. The officer who accompanied +me steered the vessel, and I held the match in my hand. We came upon +the boom with a horrid crash; he put the helm down, and laid her +broadside to it. The force of the tide acting on the hull, and the +wind upon the foresail, made her heel gunwale to, and it was with +difficulty I could keep my legs; at this moment, the boat was very +near being swamped alongside. They had shifted her astern, and there +the tide had almost lifted her over the boom; by great exertion they +got her clear, and lay upon their oars: the tide and the wind formed +a bubbling short sea, which almost buried her. My companion then got +into the boat, desiring me to light the port-fire, and follow. + +If ever I felt the sensation of fear, it was after I had lighted this +port-fire, which was connected with the train. Until I was fairly in +the boat, and out of the reach of the explosion--which was inevitable, +and might be instantaneous--the sensation was horrid. I was standing +on a mine; any fault in the port-fire, which sometimes will happen, +any trifling quantity of gunpowder lying in the interstices of the +deck, would have exploded the whole in a moment: had my hand trembled, +which I am proud to say it did not, the same might have occurred. Only +one minute and a half of port-fire was allowed. I had therefore no +time to lose. The moment I had lit it, I laid it down very gently, and +then jumped into the gig, with a nimbleness suitable to the occasion. +We were off in a moment: I pulled the stroke oar, and I never plied +with more zeal in all my life: we were not two hundred yards from her +when she exploded. + +A more terrific and beautiful sight cannot be conceived; but we were +not quite enough at our ease to enjoy it. The shells flew up in the +air to a prodigious height, some bursting as they rose, and others +as they descended. The shower fell about us, but we escaped without +injury. We made but little progress against the wind and tide; and we +had the pleasure to run the gauntlet among all the other fire-ships, +which had been ignited, and bore down on us in flames fore and aft. +Their rigging was hung with Congreve rockets; and as they took fire, +they darted through the air in every direction with an astounding +noise, looking like large fiery serpents. + +We arrived safely on board, and reported ourselves to the captain, who +was on the hammocks, watching the progress of the fire-ships. One of +these had been lighted too soon; her helm had not been lashed, and +she had broached to, close to our frigate. I had had quite enough of +adventure for that night, but was fated to have a little more. + +"Mr Mildmay," said the captain, "you seem to like the fun; jump into +your gig again, take four fresh hands" (thinks I, a fresh midshipman +would not be amiss), "get on board of that vessel, and put her head +the right way." + +I did not like this job at all; the vessel appeared to be in flames +from the jib-boom to the topsail; and I own I preferred enjoying +the honours I had already gained, to going after others so very +precarious; however, I never made a difficulty, and this was no time +for exceptions to my rule. I touched my hat, said, "Ay, ay, sir," sang +out for four volunteers, and, in an instant, I had fifty. I selected +four, and shoved off on my new expedition. + +As I approached the vessel, I could not at first discover any part +that was not tenanted by the flames, the heat of which, at the +distance of twenty or thirty feet, was far from pleasant, even in that +cold night. The weather quarter appeared to be clearest of flames, but +they burst out with great fury from the cabin windows. I contrived, +with great difficulty, to reach the deck, by climbing up that part +which was not actually burning, and was followed by one of the +sailors. The main-mast was on fire, and the flakes of burning canvas +from the boom mainsail fell on us like a snow-storm; the end of the +tiller was burnt to charcoal, but on the midship part of it I passed a +rope, and, assisted by the sailor, moved the helm, and got her before +the wind. + +While I was thus employed, I could not help thinking of my type, Don +Juan. I was nearly suffocated before I had completed my work. I shoved +off again, and away she flew before the wind. "I don't go with you +this time," said I; "_J'ai été_", as the Frenchman said, when he was +invited to an English foxhunt. + +I was as black as a negro when I returned on board, and dying with +thirst. "Very well done, Mildmay," said the captain; "did you find it +warm?" I pointed to my mouth, for it was so parched that I could not +speak, and ran to the water-cask, where I drank as much as would have +floated a canoe. The first thing I said, as soon as I could speak, was +"D---- that fire-ship, and the lubber that set her on fire." + +The next morning the French squadron was seen in a very disastrous +state; they had cut their cables, and run on shore in every direction, +with the exception of the flag ships of the admiral and rear-admiral, +which lay at their anchors, and could not move till high water; it was +then first quarter flood, so that they had five good hours to remain. +I refer my readers to the court-martial for a history of these events: +they have also been commented on, with more or less severity, by +contemporary writers. I shall only observe, that had the captains of +His Majesty's ships been left to their own judgment, much more would +have been attempted; but with what success I do not presume to say. + +My captain, as soon as he could see his mark, weighed, ran in, and +engaged the batteries, while he also directed his guns at the bottoms +of the enemy's ships, as they lay on shore on their beam ends. Isle +d'Aix gave us a warm reception. I was on the forecastle, the captain +of which had his head taken clean off, by a cannon-ball; the captain +of the ship coming forward at the same moment, only said, "Poor +fellow! throw him overboard; there is no time for a coroner's inquest +now." We were a considerable time engaging the batteries, and the +vessels near them, without receiving any assistance from our ships. + +While this was going on, a very curious instance of muscular action +occurred: a lad of eighteen years of age was on the forecastle, when +a shot cut away the whole of his bowels, which were scattered over +another midshipman and myself, and nearly blinded us. He fell--and +after lying a few seconds, sprang suddenly on his feet, stared us +horribly in the face, and fell down dead. The spine had not been +divided; but with that exception, the lower was separated from the +upper part of the body. + +Some of our vessels seeing us so warmly engaged, began to move up to +our assistance. One of our ships of the line came into action in such +gallant trim, that it was glorious to behold. She was a beautiful +ship, in what we call "high kelter;" she seemed a living body, +conscious of her own superior power over her opponents, whose shot +she despised, as they fell thick and fast about her, while she +deliberately took up an admirable position for battle. And having +furled her sails, and squared her yards, as if she had been at +Spithead, her men came down from aloft, went to their guns, and +opened such a fire on the enemy's ships and batteries, as would have +delighted the great Nelson himself, could he have been present. The +results of this action are well known, and do not need repeating here; +it was one of the winding-up scenes of the war. The French, slow to +believe their naval inferiority, now submitted in silence. Our navy +had done its work; and from that time, the brunt of the war fell on +the army. + +The advocates of fatalism or predestination might adduce a strong +illustration of their doctrine as evinced in the death of the captain +of one of the French ships destroyed. This officer had been taken out +of his ship by one of the boats of our frigate; but, recollecting that +he had left on board nautical instruments of great value, he requested +our captain to go with him in the gig, and bring them away before the +ship was burned. They did go, and the boat being very small, they sat +very close side by side, on a piece of board not much more than two +feet long, which, for want of proper seats, was laid across the stern +of the boat. One of the French ships was burning at the time; her guns +went off as fast as the fire reached them; and a chance shot took the +board from under the two captains: the English captain was not hurt; +but the splinters entered the body of the French captain, and killed +him. Late in the evening, the other French line-of-battle ships that +were ashore were set fire to, and a splendid illumination they made: +we were close to them, and the splinters and fragments of wreck fell +on board of us. + +Among our killed, was a Dutch boatswain's mate: his wife was on board, +and the stick which he was allowed to carry in virtue of his office, +he very frequently applied to the shoulders of his helpmate, in +requital for certain instances of infidelity; nor, with all my respect +for the fair sex, can I deny that the punishment was generally +deserved. When the cannon-ball had deprived her of her lawful +protector and the guardian of her honour, she sat by the side of his +mangled remains, making many unavailing efforts to weep; a tear from +one eye coursed down her cheek, and was lost in her mouth; one from +the other eye started at the same time, but for want of nourishment, +halted on her cheekbone, where, collecting the smoke and gunpowder +which surrounded us, it formed a little black peninsula and isthmus +on her face, and gave to her heroic grief a truly mourning tear. +This proof of conjugal affection she would not part with until the +following day, when having seen the last sad rites paid to the body of +her faithful Achilles, she washed her face, and resumed her smiles, +nor was she ungrateful to the ship's company for their sympathy. + +We were ordered up to Spithead with despatches, and long before we +arrived, she had made the sergeant of marines the happiest of men, +under a promise of marriage at Kingston church, before we sailed on +our next cruise, which promise was most honourably performed. + +A midshipman's vacancy having occurred on board the frigate, the +captain offered it to me. I gladly accepted of it; and while he was in +the humour, I asked him for a week's leave of absence; this he also +granted, adding, at the same time, "No more French leave, if you +please." I need not say that not an hour of this indulgence was +intended either for my father or even the dear Emily. No, Eugenia, the +beloved, in her interesting condition, claimed my undivided care. I +flew to G----, found the troop; but she, alas! had left it a fortnight +before, and had gone no one knew whither. + +Distracted with this fatal news, I sunk into a chair almost senseless, +when one of the actresses brought me a letter: I knew the hand, it was +that of Eugenia. Rushing into an empty parlour, I broke the seal, and +read as follows:-- + + +"Believe me, my dearest Mildmay, nothing but the most urgent necessity +could induce me to cause you the affliction which I know you will feel +on reading these lines. Circumstances have occurred since we parted, +that not only render it necessary that I should quit you, but also +that we should not meet again for some time; and that you should be +kept in ignorance of my place of abode. Our separation, though long, +will not, I trust, be eternal; but years may elapse before we meet +again. The sacrifice is great to me; but your honour and prosperity +demand it. I have the same ardent love towards you that I ever had; +and for your sake, will love and cherish your child. I am supported in +_this_ my trial, by a hope of our being again united. God in heaven +bless you, and prosper all your undertakings. Follow up your +profession. I shall hear and have constant intelligence of all your +motions, and I shall pray to heaven to spare your life amidst all the +dangers that your courage will urge you to encounter. Farewell! and +forget not her who never has you one moment from her thoughts. + +"EUGENIA. + +"P.S.--You may at rimes be short of cash; I know you are very +thoughtless in that respect. A letter to the subjoined address will +always be attended to, and enable you to command whatever may be +necessary for your comfort. Pride might induce you to reject this +offer; but remember it is Eugenia that offers: and if you love her as +she thinks you do, you will accept it from her." + + +Here was mystery and paradox in copious confusion. "Obliged +by circumstances to leave me--to conceal the place of her +retirement"--yet commanding not only pecuniary resources for herself, +but offering me any sum I might require! I retired to my bed; but +sleep forsook me, nor did I want it. I had too much to think of, and +no clue to solve my doubts. I prayed to Heaven for her welfare, vowed +eternal constancy, and at length fell asleep. The next morning I took +leave of my quondam associates, and returned to Portsmouth, neither +wishing to see my father, my family, or even the sweet Emily. It +however occurred to me that the same agent who could advance money +could forward a letter; and a letter I wrote, expressing all I felt. +No answer was returned; but as the letter never came back, I was +convinced it was received, and occasionally sent others, the +contents of which my readers will, no doubt, feel obliged to me for +suppressing, love-letters being of all things in the world the most +stupid, except to the parties concerned. + +As I was not to see my Eugenia, I was delighted to hear that we +were again to be sent on active service. The Scheldt expedition was +preparing, and our frigate was to be in the advance; but our gallant +and favourite captain was not to go with us; an acting captain was +appointed, and every exertion was used to have the ship ready. The +town in the meantime was as crowded with soldiers as Spithead and +the harbour was with transports. Late in July, we sailed, having two +gunboats in tow, which we were ordered to man. I applied for, and +obtained the command of one of them, quite certain that I should see +more service, and consequently have more amusement, than if I +remained on board the frigate. We convoyed forty or fifty transports, +containing the cavalry, and brought them all safe to an anchor off +Cadsand. + +The weather was fine, and the water smooth; not a moment was lost in +disembarking the troops and horses; and I do not recollect ever having +seen, either before or since, a more pleasing sight. The men were +first sent on shore with their saddles and bridles: the horses were +then lowered into the water in running slings, which were slipped +clear off them in a moment; and as soon as they found themselves free, +they swam away for the shore, which they saluted with a loud neigh as +soon as they landed. In the space of a quarter of a mile we had three +or four hundred horses in the water, all swimming for the shore at the +same time; while their anxious riders stood on the beach waiting their +arrival. I never saw so novel or picturesque a sight. + +I found the gun-boat service very hard. We were stationed off +Batz, and obliged to be constantly on the alert; but when Flushing +surrendered we had more leisure, and we employed it in procuring some +articles for our table, to which we had been too long strangers. Our +money had been expended in the purchase of champagne and claret, in +which articles we were no economists, consequently few florins could +be spared for the purchase of poultry and butcher meat; but then these +articles were to be procured, by the same means which had given us the +island of Walcheren, namely powder and shot. The country people were +very churlish, and not at all inclined to barter; and as we had +nothing to give in exchange, we avoided useless discussion. Turkeys, +by us short-sighted mortals, were often mistaken for pheasants; cocks +and hens, for partridges; tame ducks and geese for wild; in short, +such was our hurry and confusion--leaping ditches, climbing dykes, +and fording swamps--that Buffon himself would never have known the +difference between a goose and a peacock. Our game-bags were as +capacious as our consciences, and our aim as good as our appetites. + +The peasants shut all their poultry up in their barns, and very +liberally bestowed all their curses upon us. Thus all our supplies +were cut off, and foraging became at least a source of difficulty, if +not of danger. I went on shore with our party, put a bullet into my +fowling-piece, and, as I thought, shot a deer; but on more minute +inspection, it proved to be a four months' calf. This was an accident +that might have happened to any man. The carcass was too heavy +to carry home, so we cut it in halves, not fore and aft down the +backbone, as your stupid butchers do, but made a short cut across the +loins, a far more compendious and portable method than the other. We +marched off with the hind legs, loins, and kidney, having first of all +buried the head and shoulders in the field, determined to call and +take it away the following night. + +We were partly seen, and severely scrutinized in our action by +a neighbouring gun-boat, whose crew were no doubt as hungry as +ourselves; they got hold of one of our men, who, like a fool, let the +cat out of the bag, when a pint of grog got into it. The fellow hinted +where the other half lay, and these _unprincipled rascals_ went after +it, fully resolved to appropriate it to themselves; but they were +outwitted, as they deserved to be for their roguery. The farmer to +whom the calf belonged had got a hint of what was done, and finding +that we had buried one half of the calf, procured a party of soldiers +ready to take possession of us when we should come to fetch it away; +accordingly, the party who went from the other gun-boat after dark, +having found out the spot, were very busy disinterring their prey, +when they were surprised, taken prisoners, and marched away to the +British camp, leaving the dead body behind. + +We, quite unconscious of what was done, came soon after, found our +veal, and marched off with it. The prisoners were in the meantime sent +on board the flag ship, with the charge of robbery strongly preferred +against them; indeed, _flagrante delicto_ was proved. In vain they +protested that they were not the slayers, but only went in search of +what others had killed: the admiral, who was a kind-hearted man, said, +that that was a very good story, but desired them "not to tell lies +to old rogues," and ordered them all under arrest: at the same time +giving directions for a most rigid scrutiny into the larder of the +other gun-boat, with a view, if possible, to discover the remains of +the calf. This we had foreseen would happen, so we put it into one +of the sailor's bags, and sank it with a lead-line in three fathoms +water, where it lay till the inspection was over, when we dressed it, +and made an excellent dinner, drinking success to His Majesty's arms +by land and sea. + +Whether I had been intemperate in food or libation I know not, but +I was attacked with the Walchèren fever, and was sent home in a +line-of-battle ship; and, perhaps, as Pangloss says, it was all for +the best; for I knew I could not have left off my inveterate habits, +and it would have been very inconvenient to me, and distressing to my +friends, to have ended my brilliant career, and stopped these memoirs, +at the beginning of the second and most interesting volume, by hanging +the Author up, like a scarecrow, under the superintendence of the +rascally provost-marshal, merely for catering on the land of a +Walcheren farmer. Moreover, the Dutch were unworthy of liberty, as +their actions proved, to begrudge a few fowls, or a fillet of veal, +to the very men who came to rescue them from bondage;--and then their +water, too, who ever drank such stuff? for my part, I never tasted it +when I could get anything better. As to their nasty swamps and fogs, +quite good enough for such croaking fellows as they are, what could +induce an Englishman to live among them, except the pleasure of +killing Frenchmen, or shooting game? Deprive us of these pursuits, +which the surrender of Flushing effectually did, and Walcheren, with +its ophthalmia and its agues, was no longer a place for a gentleman. +Besides, I plainly saw that if there ever had been any intention of +advancing to Antwerp, the time was now gone by; and as the French were +laughing at us, and I never liked to be made a butt of, particularly +by such chaps as these, I left the scene of our sorrows and disgraces +without regret. + +The farewell of Voltaire came into my mind. "_Adieu, Canaux, Canardes, +et Canaille_," which might be rendered into English thus:--"Good-bye, +Dykes, Ducks, and Dutchmen." So I returned to my father's house to be +nursed by my sister, and to astonish the neighbours with the history +of our wonderful achievements. + + + + +Chapter XII + + First came great Neptune, with his three-forkt mace, + That rules the seas, and makes them rise or fall: + His dewy locks did drop with brine apace + Under his diademe-imperiall: + And by his side his queene with coronall, + Fair Amphitrite + + * * * * * + + These marched farre afore the other crew. + + SPENSER. + + +I remained no longer at home than sufficed to restore my strength, +after the serious attack of fever and ague which I had brought with +me from Walcheren. Although my father received me kindly, he had not +forgotten (at least I thought so) my former transgressions; a mutual +distrust destroyed that intimacy which ought ever to exist between +father and son. The thread was broken--it is vain to enquire how, and +the consequence was, that the day of my departure to join a frigate +on the North American station, was welcomed with joy by me, and seen +unregretted by my father. + +The ship I was about to join was commanded by a young nobleman, and as +patricians were not so plentiful in the service at that time, as they +have since become, I was considered fortunate in my appointment. I was +ordered, with about thirty more supernumerary midshipmen, to take my +passage in a ship of the line, going to Bermuda. The gun-room was +given to us as our place of residence, the midshipmen belonging to the +ship occupying the two snug berths in the cockpit. + +Among so many young men of different habits and circumstances, all +joining the ship at different periods, no combination could be made +for forming a mess. The ship sailed soon after I got on board, and +our party, during the voyage, was usually supplied from the purser's +steward-room. I have thought it very wonderful, that a mess of eight +or twelve seamen or marines will always make the allowance last from +one week to another, and have something to spare; but with the same +number of midshipmen the case is very different, and the larger +the mess the more do their difficulties increase; they are never +satisfied, never have enough, and if the purser will allow them, are +always in debt for flour, beef, pork, and spirits. This is owing to +their natural habits of carelessness; and our mess, for this reason, +was particularly uncomfortable. The government was a democracy; but +the caterer had at times been invested with dictatorial powers, which +he either abused or was thought to abuse, and he was accordingly +turned out, or resigned in disgust, at the end of two or three days. + +Most of my messmates were young men, senior to me in the service, +having passed their examinations, and were going to America for +promotion: but when mustered on the quarter-deck, whether they +appeared less manly, or were, in fact, less expert in their duty, I +know not; but certain it is, that the first lieutenant appointed +me mate of a watch, and placed several of these aspirants under my +orders: and so strong did we muster, that we stood in each other's way +when on deck keeping our watch, seldom less than seventeen or eighteen +in number. + +In the gun-room we agreed very ill together, and one principal cause +of this was our short allowance of food--daily skirmishes took place, +and not unfrequently pitched battles; but I never took any other part +in them than as a spectator, and the observations I made convinced me +that I should have no great difficulty in mastering the whole of them. + +The office of caterer was one of neither honour nor emolument, and +it was voluntarily taken up, and peevishly laid down, on the first +trifling provocation. With the ship's allowance, no being, less than +an angel, could have given satisfaction. The division of beef and +pork into as many parcels as there were claimants, always produced +remonstrance, reproof, and blows. I was never quarrelsome, and took +the part allotted to me quietly enough, until, they finding my +disposition to submit, I found my portion daily decrease, and on the +resignation of the thirteenth caterer, I volunteered my services, +which were gladly accepted. + +Aware of the danger and difficulty of my situation, I was prepared +accordingly. On the first day that I shared the provisions, I took +very good care of number one, and, as I had foreseen, was attacked by +two or three for my lion-like division of the prey. Upon this, I made +them a short speech, observing, that if they supposed I meant to take +the trouble of catering for nothing, they were very much mistaken; +that the small difference I made between their portions and mine, if +equally divided among them, would not fill a hollow tooth, and that, +after my own share, all others should be distributed with the most +rigid impartiality, and scrupulous regard to justice. + +This very reasonable speech did not satisfy them. I was challenged to +decide the point _à la Cribb_; two candidates for the honour stepped +out at once. I desired them to toss up; and having soon defeated the +winner, I recommended him to return to his seat. The next man came +forward, hoping to find an easy victory, after the fatigue of a recent +battle; but he was mistaken, and retired with severe chastisement. +The next day I took my seat, cleared for action--coat, waistcoat, and +neckcloth off. I observed that I should proceed as I had done before, +and was ready to hold a court of Oyer and Terminer; but no suitors +appeared, and I held the office of caterer from that day till I +quitted the ship, by the strongest of all possible claims--first, by +election; and, secondly, by right of conquest. + +We had not been many days at sea, before we discovered that our first +lieutenant was a most abominable tyrant, a brutal fellow, a drunkard, +and a glutton, with a long red nose, and a large belly; he frequently +sent half-a-dozen grown-up midshipmen to the mast-head at a time. This +man I determined to turn out of the ship, and mentioned my intention +to my messmates, promising them success if they would only follow my +advice. They quite laughed at the idea; but I was firm, and told them +that it should come to pass, if they would but behave so ill as just +to incur a slight punishment or reprimand from "Nosey" every day; this +they agreed to; and not a day passed but they were either mast-headed, +or put watch and watch. + +They reported all to me, and asked my advice. "Complain to the +captain," said I. They did, and were told that the first lieutenant +had done his duty. The same causes produced the same effects on each +succeeding day; and when the midshipmen complained, they had no +redress. By my direction, they observed to the captain, "It is of +no use complaining, sir; you always take Mr Clewline's part." The +captain, indeed, from a general sense of propriety, gave his support +to the ward-room officers, knowing that, nine times in ten, midshipmen +were in the wrong. + +Things worked as I wished; the midshipmen persisted in behaving +ill--remonstrated, and declared that the first lieutenant did not tell +the truth. For a time, many of them lost the favour of the captain, +but I encouraged them to bear that, as well as the increased rancour +of "Old Nosey." One day two midshipmen, by previous agreement, began +to fight on the lee gangway. In those days, that was crime enough +almost to have hanged them; they were sent to the mast-head for three +hours, and when they came down applied to me for advice. "Go," said I, +"and complain. If the first lieutenant says you were fighting, tell +the captain you were only showing how the first lieutenant pummelled +the men last night when they were hoisting the topsails, and the way +he cut the marine's head, when he knocked him down the hatchway." All +this was fairly done--the midshipmen received a reprimand, but the +captain began to think there might be some cause for these continued +complaints, which daily increased both in weight and number. + +At last we were enabled to give the _coup de grace_. A wretched boy +in the ship, whose dirty habits often brought him to the gun, was so +hardened that he laughed at all the stripes of the boatswain's cat +inflicted on him by the first lieutenant. "I will make him feel," said +the enraged officer; so ordering a bowl of brine to be brought to him, +he sprinkled it on the lacerated flesh of the boy between every lash. +This inhuman act, so unbecoming the character of an officer and a +gentleman, we all resented, and retiring to the gun-room in a body, +gave three deep and heavy groans in chorus. The effect was dismal; +it was heard in the ward-room, and the first lieutenant sent down to +desire we should be quiet; on which we immediately gave three more, +which sent him in a rage to the quarter-deck, where we were all +summoned, and the reason of the noise demanded. I had, till then, kept +myself in the background, content with being the _primum mobile_, +without being seen. I was always strict to my duty, and never had +been complained of; my coming forward, therefore, on this occasion, +produced a fine stage effect, and carried great weight. + +I told the lieutenant we were groaning for the poor boy who had +been pickled. This increased his rage, and he ordered me up to the +mast-head. I refused to go until I had seen the captain, who at that +moment made his appearance on deck. I immediately referred to him, +related the whole story, not omitting to mention the repeated acts of +tyranny which the lieutenant had perpetrated on us all. I saw in a +moment that we had gained the day. The captain had given the most +positive orders that no one should be punished without his express +permission. This order the lieutenant had disobeyed, and that, added +to his unpopular character, decided his fate. The captain walked into +his cabin, and the next day signified to the first lieutenant, that +he must quit the ship on her arrival in port, or be tried by a +court-martial: this latter he knew he dared not stand. + +I should have informed my reader that our orders were to see the +East-India convoy as far as the tenth degree of north latitude, and +then proceed to Bermuda. This was of itself a pleasant cruise, and +gave us the chance of falling in either with an enemy or a recapture. +Ships not intending to cross the line usually grant a saturnalia to +the crew when they come to the tropic of Capricorn; it is thought to +renovate their spirits, and to break the monotony of the cruise, or +voyage, where time flows on in such a smooth, undeviating routine, +that one day is not distinguishable from another. Our captain, a young +man, and a perfect gentleman, never refused any indulgence to the men, +compatible with discipline and the safety of the ship: and as the +regular trade-wind blew, there was no danger of sudden squalls +The ceremony of crossing the line, I am aware, has been often +described--so has Italy and the Rhine; but there are varieties of ways +of doing and relating these things; ours had its singularity, and +ended, I am sorry to say, in a deep tragedy, which I shall remember +"as long as memory holds her seat." + +One beautiful morning, as soon as the people had breakfasted, they +began to prepare, by stripping to their waists, and wearing nothing +but a pair of duck trousers. The man at the mast-head called out that +he saw something on the weather bow, which he thought was a boat; soon +after, an unknown voice from the jib-boom hailed the ship; the officer +of the watch answered; and the voice commanded him to heave to, as +Neptune was coming on board. The ship was accordingly hove to with +every formality, though going at the rate of seven miles an hour: the +main-yard squared, the head and after-yards braced up. + +As soon as the ship was hove to, a young man (one of the sailors) +dressed in a smart suit of black, knee-breeches, and buckles, with his +hair powdered, and with all the extra finery and mincing gait of an +exquisite, came aft on the quarter-deck, and, with a most polished +bow, took the liberty of introducing himself as _gentleman's +gentleman_ to Mr Neptune, who had been desired to precede his master +and acquaint the commander of the vessel with his intended visit. + +A sail had been extended across the forecastle by way of curtain, and +from behind this, Neptune and his train, in full costume, shortly +afterwards came forth. + +The car of the god consisted of a gun-carriage: it was drawn by six +black men, part of the ship's crew: they were tall muscular fellows, +their heads were covered with sea-weed, and they wore a very small +pair of cotton drawers: in other respects they were perfectly +naked; their skins were spotted all over with red and white paint +alternately; they had conch shells in their hands, with which they +made a most horrible noise. Neptune was masked, as were many of his +attendants, and none of the officers knew exactly by which of the men +the god was represented; but he was a shrewd hand, and did his part +very well. He wore a naval crown, made by the ship's armourer; in +his right hand he held a trident, on the prongs of which there was a +dolphin, which he had, he said, struck that morning; he wore a large +wig, made of oakum, and a beard of the same materials, which flowed +down to his waist; he was full powdered, and his naked body was +bedaubed with paint. + +The god was attended by a splendid court: his secretary of state, +whose head was stuck full of the quills of the sea bird of these +latitudes; his surgeon, with his lancet, pill-box, and his +smelling-bottle; his barber, with a razor, whose blade was two feet +long, cut off an iron hoop; and the barber's mate, who carried a small +tub, as a shaving-box; the materials within I could not analyze, +but my nose convinced me that no part of them came from Smith's, in +Bond-street. + +Amphitrite followed, on a similar carriage, drawn by six white men, +whose costume was like the others. This goddess was personified by an +athletic, ugly man, marked with the small-pox, dressed as a female, +with a woman's night-cap on his head, ornamented with sprigs of +sea-weed; she had a harpoon in her hand, on which was fixed an +albicore; and in her lap lay one of the boys of the ship, dressed as a +baby, with long clothes and a cap: he held in his hand a marlinspike, +which was suspended round his neck with a rope yarn: this was to +assist him in cutting his teeth, as the children on shore use a coral. +His nurse attended him with a bucket full of burgoo, or hasty pudding, +with which she occasionally fed him out of the cook's iron ladle. +Two or three stout men were habited as sea nymphs, to attend on +the goddess: they carried a looking-glass, some curry-combs, a +birch-broom, and a pot of red paint, by way of rouge. + +As soon as the procession appeared on the forecastle, the captain, +attended by his steward, bearing a tray with a bottle of wine and some +glasses, came out of his cabin, and the cars of the marine deities +were drawn up on the quarter-deck. Neptune lowered his trident, and +presented the dolphin to the captain, as Amphitrite did her albicore, +in token of submission and homage to the representative of the King of +Great Britain. + +"I have come," said the god, "to welcome you into my dominions, and to +present my wife and child." The captain bowed. "Allow me to ask after +my brother and liege sovereign, the good old King George." + +"He is not so well," said the captain, "as I and all his subjects +could wish." + +"More's the pity," replied Neptune; "and how is the Prince of Wales?" + +"The Prince is well," said the captain, "and now governs as regent in +the name of his royal father." + +"And how does he get on with his wife?" said the inquisitive god. + +"Bad enough," said the captain; "they agree together like a whale and +a thrasher." + +"Ah! I thought so," said the god of the sea. "His royal highness +should take a leaf out of my book: never allow it to be doubtful who +is commanding officer." + +"And pray what might your majesty's specific be, to cure a bad wife?" +said the captain. + +"Three feet of the cross-jack brace every morning before breakfast, +for a quarter of an hour, and half an hour on a Sunday." + +"But why more on a Sunday than any other day?" said the captain. + +"Why?" said Neptune, "why, because she'd been keeping Saturday night, +to be sure; besides, she has less to do of a Sunday, and more time to +think of her sins, and do penance." + +"But you would not have a prince strike a lady, surely?" + +"Wouldn't I? No to be sure, if she behave herself as _sich_, on no +account; but if she gives tongue, and won't keep sober, I'd sarve her +as I do Amphy--don't I, Amphy?" chucking the goddess under the chin. +"We have no bad wives in the bottom of the sea: and so if you don't +know how to keep 'em in order, send them to us." + +"But your majesty's remedy is violent; we should have a rebellion in +England, if the king was to beat his wife." + +"Make the lords in waiting do it then," said the Surly god; "and if +they are too lazy, which I dare say they are, send for a boatswain's +mate from the Royal Billy--he'd sarve her out, I warrant you; and, for +half a gallon of rum, would teach the yeomen of the guard to dance the +binnacle hornpipe into the bargain." + +"His royal highness shall certainly hear your advice, Mr Neptune; +but whether he will follow it or not is not for me to say. Would you +please to drink his royal highness's good health?" + +"With all my heart, sir; I was always loyal to my king, and ready to +drink his health, and to fight for him." + +The captain presented the god with a bumper of Madeira, and another to +the goddess. + +"Here's a good health and a long life to our gracious king and all the +royal family. The roads are unkimmon dusty, and we hav'n't wet our +lips since we left St Thomas on the line, this morning. But we have no +time to lose, captain," said the sea god; "I see many new faces here, +as requires washing and shaving; and if we add bleeding and physic, +they will be all the better for it." + +The captain nodded assent; and Neptune, striking the deck with the end +of his trident, commanded attention, and thus addressed his court: +"Heark ye, my Tritons, you are called here to shave, duck, and physic +all as needs, but I command you to be gentle. I'll have no ill-usage; +if we gets a bad name, we gets no more fees; and the first of you as +disobeys my orders, I'll tie him to a ten-inch mortar, and sink him +ten thousand fathoms deep in the ocean, where he shall feed on salt +water and sea-weed for a hundred years: begone to your work." Twelve +constables, with thick sticks, immediately repaired to the hatchway, +and sent down all who had not been initiated, guarding them strictly, +until they were called up one by one. + +The cow-pen had been previously prepared for the bathing; it was lined +with double canvas, and boarded, so that it held water, and contained +about four butts, which was constantly renewed by the pump. Many of +the officers purchased exemption from shaving and physic by a bottle +of rum; but none could escape the sprinkling of salt water, which fell +about in great profusion; even the captain received his share, but +with great good-nature, and seemed to enjoy the sport. It was easy +to perceive, on this occasion, who were favourites with the ship's +company, by the degree of severity with which they were treated. The +tyro was seated on the side of the cow-pen: he was asked the place of +his nativity, and the moment he opened his mouth, the shaving-brush of +the barber, which was a very large paint brush, was crammed in with +all the filthy lather with which they covered his face and chin; this +was roughly scraped off with the great razor. The doctor felt his +pulse, and prescribed a pill, which was forced into his cheek; and +the smelling-bottle, the cork of which was armed with short points of +pins, was so forcibly applied to his nose as to bring blood; after +this, he was thrown backwards into the bath, and allowed to scramble +out the best way he could. + +The master-at-arms, and ship's corporals, and purser's steward, were +severely treated. The midshipmen looked out for the first lieutenant; +but he kept so close under the wing of the captain, that for a long +time we were unable to succeed. At length, some great uproar in the +waist induced him to run down, when we all surrounded him, and plied +him so effectually with buckets of water, that he was glad to run down +the after-hatchway, and seek shelter in the gun-room; as he ran down, +we threw the buckets after him, and he fell, like the Roman virgin, +covered with the shields of the soldiers. + +The purser had fortified himself in his cabin, and with his sword and +pistols, vowed vengeance against all intruders; but the middies were +not to be frightened with swords or pistols: so we had him out, and +gave him a sound ducking, because he had refused to let us have more +spirits than our allowance. He was paraded to the main-deck in great +form, his sword held over his head; his pistols, in a bucket of water, +carried before him; and having been duly shaved, physicked, and soused +into the cow-pen, he was allowed to return to his cabin, like a +drowned rat. + +The first lieutenant of marines was a great bore; he was always +annoying us with his German flute. Having no ear of his own, he had no +mercy on ours, so we handed him to the bath; and in addition to all +the other luxuries of the day, made him drink, half a pint of salt +water, which we poured into his mouth through his own flute, as a +funnel. I now recollect that it was the cries of the poor marine which +brought down the first lieutenant, who ordered us to desist, and we +served him as hath been related. + +Thus far all was hilarity and mirth; but the scene was very suddenly +changed. One of the foretopmen, drawing water in the chains, fell +overboard; the alarm was instantly given, and the ship hove to. I +ran upon the poop, and, seeing that the man could not swim, jumped +overboard to save him. The height from which I descended made me go +very deep in the water, and when I arose I could perceive one of the +man's hands. I swam towards him; but, O, God! what was my horror, when +I found myself in the midst of his blood. I comprehended in a moment +that a shark had taken him, and expected that every instant my own +fate would be like his. I wonder I had not sunk with fear: I was +nearly paralyzed. The ship, which had been going six or seven miles +an hour, was at some distance, and I gave myself up for gone. I had +scarcely the power of reflection, and was overwhelmed by the sudden, +awful, and, as I thought, certain approach of death in its most +horrible shape. In a moment I recollected myself: and I believe the +actions of five years crowded into my mind in as many minutes. I +prayed most fervently, and vowed amendment, if it should please God +to spare me. My prayer was heard, and I believe it was a special +Providence that rescued me from the jaws of the fish. I was nearly +a mile from the ship before I was picked up; and when the boat came +alongside with me, three large sharks were under the stern. These had +devoured the poor sailor, and, fortunately for me, had followed the +ship for more prey, and thus left me to myself. + +As I went up the side, I was received by the captain and officers in +the most flattering manner; the captain thanked me in the presence of +the ship's company for my praiseworthy exertions, and I was gazed on +by all as an object of interest and admiration; but if others thought +so of me, I thought not so of myself. I retired below to my berth with +a loathing and contempt, a self-abasement, which I cannot describe. I +felt myself unworthy of the mercy I had received. The disgraceful +and vicious course of life I had led, burst upon me with horrible +conviction. "_Caelo tonantem credidimus Jovem regnare_," says +Horace; and it was only by the excitement of such peculiarly horrid +situations, that the sense of a superintending power could be awakened +within me, a hardened and incorrigible sinner. + +I changed my clothes, and was glad when night came, that I might be +left to myself; but oh, how infinitely more horrid did my situation +appear! I shuddered when I thought of what I had gone through, and I +made the most solemn promises of a new life. How transient were these +feelings! How long did these good resolutions last? Just as long as no +temptation came in the way; as long as there was no excitement to sin, +no means of gratifying appetite. My good intentions were traced in the +sand. I was very soon as thoughtless and as profane as ever, although +frequently checked by the remembrance of my providential escape; and +for years afterwards the thoughts of the shark taking me by the leg +was accompanied by the acknowledgment that the devil would have me in +like manner, if I did not amend. + +If after this awakening circumstance, I could have had the good +fortune to have met with sober-minded and religious people, I have no +doubt but I might have had at this time much less to answer for; but +that not being the case, the force of habit and example renewed its +dominion over me, and I became nearly as bad as ever. + +Our amusements in the gun-room were rough. One of them was to lie on +the mess table, under the tiller, and to hold by the tiller ropes +above, while we kicked at all who attempted to dislodge us, either by +force or stratagem. Whoever had possession, had nine points of the +law, and could easily oppose the whole. I one day held this envied +position, and kept all at bay, when, unluckily, one of the passed +midshipmen, who had got very drunk with the gunner, came in and made +a furious attack on me. I gave him a kick on the face, that sent him +with great violence on his back, among the plates and dishes, which +had been removed from the dinner-table and placed between the guns. +Enraged, as much at the laughter against him as at the blow he had +received, he snatched up a carving fork, and, before any one was aware +of his intention, stabbed me with it four times. I jumped up to punish +him, but the moment I got on my legs was so stiff, that I fell back +into the arms of my messmates. + +The surgeon examined the wounds, which were serious; two of them +nearly touched an artery. I was put to bed sick, and was three weeks +confined to my berth. The midshipman who had committed this outrage, +was very penitent when sober, and implored my pardon and forgiveness. +Naturally good-natured, I freely forgave, because I was disarmed by +submission. I never trampled on a prostrate foe. The surgeon reported +me ill of a fever, which was true; for had the captain known the real +fact, the midshipman, whose commission was signed, and in the ship, +ready to be delivered to him on his arrival at Bermuda, would +certainly have lost his promotion. My kindness to him, I believe, +wounded him more than my resentment; he became exceedingly melancholy +and thoughtful, gave up drinking, and was ever after greatly attached +to me. I reckon this among the few good actions of my life, and own I +have great pleasure in reflecting upon it. + +We arrived at Bermuda soon after, having left the convoy in the +latitude of ten degrees north. The supernumeraries were all discharged +into their respective ships; and before we separated, we had the +pleasure to see the first lieutenant take his passage in a ship bound +to England. Most sincerely did we congratulate ourselves on the +success of our intrigue. + + + + +Chapter XIII + + Where the remote Bermudas ride, + In th' ocean's bosom. + + ANDREW MARVELL. + + +There is a peculiar kind of beauty among these islands, which we might +really believe to be the abode of fairies. They consist of a cluster +of rocks, formed by the zoophyte, or coral worm. The number of the +islands is said to be equal to the days of the year. They are covered +with a short green sward, dark cedar trees, and low white houses, +which have a pretty and pleasing effect; the harbours are numerous, +but shallow; and though there are many channels into them, there is +but one for large ships into the principal anchorage. + +Numerous caverns, whose roofs sparkle with the spars and stalactites +formed by the dripping water, are found in every part of the islands. +They contain springs of delicious coolness, to quench the thirst, or +to bathe in. The sailors have a notion that these islands float, and +that the crust which composes them is so thin as to be broken with +little exertion. One man being confined in the guardhouse for having +got drunk and misbehaved, stamped on the ground, and roared to the +guard, "Let me out, or, d--nour eyes, I'll knock a hole in your +bottom, scuttle your island, and send you all to h---- together." +Rocks and shoals abound in almost every direction, but chiefly on the +north and west sides. They are, however, well known to the native +pilots, and serve as a safeguard from nightly surprise or invasion. + +Varieties of fish are found here, beautiful to the eye and delicious +to the taste: of these, the best is the red grouper. When on a calm, +clear day, you glide among these lovely islands, in your boat, you +seem to be sailing over a submarine flower-garden, in which clumps of +trees, shrubs, flowers, and gravel walks, are planted in wild, but +regular confusion. + +My chief employment was afloat, and according to my usual habit, +I found no amusement unless it was attended with danger; and this +propensity found ample gratification in the whale fishery, the season +for which was just approaching. The ferocity of the fish in these +southern latitudes appears to be increased, both from the heat of the +climate and the care of their young, for which reason it would seem +that the risk in taking them is greater than in the polar seas. + +From what I am able to learn of the natural history of the whale, she +brings forth her young seldom more than one at a time in the northern +regions, after which, with the calf at her side, the mother seeks a +more genial climate, to bring it to maturity. They generally reach +Bermuda about the middle of March, where they remain but a few weeks, +after which they visit the West India Islands, then bear away to the +southward, and go round Cape Horn, returning to the polar seas by +the Aleutian Islands and Behring's Straits, which they reach in the +following summer; when the young whale, having acquired size and +strength in the southern latitudes, is enabled to contend with his +enemies in the north, and here also the dam meets the male again. From +my own experience and the inquiries I have been enabled to make, I am +tolerably certain that this is a correct statement of the migration of +these animals, the females annually making the tour of the two great +American continents, attended by their young. + +The "maternal solicitude" of the whale makes her a dangerous +adversary, and many serious accidents occur in the season for catching +whales. On one occasion I had nearly paid with my life for the +gratification of my curiosity. I went in a whale-boat rowed by +coloured men, natives of the islands, who were very daring and expert +in this pursuit. We saw a whale, with her calf, playing round the +coral rocks; the attention which the dam showed to its young, the care +she took to warn it of danger, was truly affecting. She led it away +from the boats, swam round it, and sometimes she would embrace it with +her fins, and roll over with it in the waves. We contrived to get the +"'vantage ground" by going to seaward of her, and by that means drove +her into shoal water among the rocks. At last we came so near the +young one, that the harpooner poised his weapon, knowing that the calf +once struck, the mother was our own, for she would never desert it. +Aware of the danger and impending fate of its inexperienced offspring, +she swam rapidly round it, in decreasing circles, evincing the utmost +uneasiness and anxiety; but the parental admonitions were unheeded, +and it met its fate. + +The boat approached the side of the younger fish, and the harpooner +buried his tremendous weapon deep in the ribs. The moment it felt the +wound, the poor animal darted from us, taking out a hundred fathom of +line; but a young fish is soon conquered when once well struck: such +was the case in this instance; it was no sooner checked with the line +than it turned on its back, and, displaying its white belly on the +surface of the water, floated a lifeless corpse. The unhappy parent, +with an instinct always more powerful than reason, never quitted the +body. + +We hauled in upon the line, and came close up to our quarry just +as another boat had fixed a harpoon in the mother. The tail of the +furious animal descended with irresistible force upon the very centre +of our boat, cutting it in two, and killing two of the men; the +survivors took to swimming for their lives in all directions. The +whale went in pursuit of the third boat, but was checked by the line +from the one that had struck her: she towed them at the rate of ten or +eleven miles an hour: and had she had deep water, would have taken the +boat down, or obliged them to cut away from her. + +The two boats were so much employed that they could not come to our +assistance for some time, and we were left to our own resources much +longer than I thought agreeable. I was going to swim to the calf +whale; but one of the men advised me not to do so, saying that the +sharks would be as thick about him as the lawyers round Westminster +Hall; and that I should certainly be snapped up if I went near: for +my comfort he added, "These devils seldom touch a man if they can get +anything else." This might be very true; but I must confess I was very +glad to see one of the boats come to our assistance, while the mother +whale, encumbered with the heavy harpoon and line, and exhausted with +the fountain of black blood which she threw up, drew near to her calf, +and died by its side; evidently, in her last moments, more occupied +with the preservation of her young than of herself. + +As soon as she turned on her back, I had reason to thank the "Mudian" +for his good advice; there were at least thirty or forty sharks +assembled round the carcasses; and as we towed them in, they followed. +When we had grounded them in the shallow water, close to the beach, +the blubber was cut off; after which, the flesh was given to the black +people, who assembled in crowds, and cut off with their knives large +portions of the meat. The sharks as liberally helped themselves with +their teeth; but it was very remarkable, that though the black men +often came between them and the whale, they never attacked a man. This +was a singular scene; the blacks with their white eyes and teeth, +hallooing, laughing, screaming, and mixing with numerous sharks--the +most ferocious monsters of the deep--yet preserving a sort of truce +during the presence of a third object: it reminded me, comparing great +things with small, of the partition of Poland. + +I found that there was neither honour nor profit for me in this +diversion, so I no more went a whale fishing, but took my passage to +Halifax, in a schooner; one of those vessels built during the war, +in imitation of the Virginia pilot boats; but, like most of our +imitations, about as much resembling the original as a cow is like a +hare, and bearing exactly the same proportion in point of velocity. +And as if it had been determined that these vessels should in every +respect disgrace the British flag, the command of them was conferred +on officers whose conduct would not induce captains to allow them to +serve under them, and who were therefore very unwisely sent into small +vessels, where they became their own masters, and were many of them +constantly drunk; such was the state of my commander from the time I +sailed until we reached Halifax. The example of the lieutenant was +followed by his mate, and three midshipmen; the crew, which consisted +of twenty-five men, were kept sober by being confined to their +allowance, and I had a hopeful prospect. + +Fortunately, drinking was not among my vices. I could get "fresh," as +we call it, when in good company and excited by wit and mirth; but I +never went to the length of being drunk; and, as I advanced in years, +pride and cunning made me still more guarded. I perceived the immense +advantage which sobriety gave me over a drunkard, and I failed not to +profit by it. + +Keeping constantly on deck, almost night and day, I attended to the +course of the vessel and the sail she carried, never taking the +trouble to consult the lieutenant, who was generally senseless in his +cabin. We made Sambro' Lighthouse (which is at the entrance of Halifax +harbour) in the evening, and one of the midshipmen, who was more than +half drunk, declared himself well acquainted with the place, and his +offer to pilot the vessel in was accepted. As I had never been there +before, I could be of no use; but being extremely doubtful of the +skill of our pilot, I watched his proceedings with some anxiety. + +In half an hour we found ourselves on shore on Cornwallis Island, as +I afterwards learned, and the sea made a fair breach over us. This +sobered the lieutenant and his officers; and as the tide fell, we +found ourselves high and dry. The vessel fell over on her side, and I +walked on shore, determined to trust myself no more with such a set of +beasts. Boats came down from the dockyard at daylight, and took me and +some others who had followed my example, together with our luggage, to +the flag-ship. After two days' hard labour, the vessel was got off, +and brought into the harbour. The admiral was informed of the whole +transaction, and one of the captains advised him to try the lieutenant +by a court-martial, or, at least, to turn him out of the vessel, and +send him home. Unfortunately, he would not follow this advice, but +sent him to sea again, with despatches. It was known that all hands +were drunk on quitting the port; and the vessel ran upon a reef of +rocks called the Sisters, where she sank, and every soul perished. Her +mast-heads were seen just above water the next morning. + +The frigate I was to join, came into harbour soon after I reached +Halifax. This I was sorry for, as I found myself in very good +quarters. I had letters of introduction to the best families. The +place is proverbial for hospitality; and the society of the young +ladies, who are both virtuous and lovely, tended in some degree +to reform and polish the rough and libertine manners which I had +contracted in my career. I had many sweethearts; but they were more +like Emily than Eugenia. I was a great flirt among them, and would +willingly have spent more time in their company; but my fate or +fortune was to be accomplished, and I went on board the frigate, where +I presented my introductory letters to the nobleman who commanded her. +I expected to have seen an effeminate young man, much too refined to +learn his business; but I was mistaken. Lord Edward was a sailor +every inch of him: he knew a ship from stem to stern, understood the +characters of seamen, and gained their confidence. He was, besides, +a good mechanic--a carpenter, rope-maker, sail-maker, and cooper. He +could hand, reef, and steer, knot and splice; but he was no orator: +he read little, and spoke less. He was a man of no show. He was +good-tempered, honest, and unsophisticated, with a large proportion of +common sense. He was good-humoured and free with his officers; though, +if offended he was violent but soon calm again; nor could you ever +perceive any assumption of consequence from his title of nobility. He +was pleased with my expertness in practical seamanship; and before +we left the harbour, I became a great favourite. This I took care +to improve, as I liked him both for himself and his good qualities, +independently of the advantages of being on good terms with the +captain. + +We were not allowed to remain long in this paradise of sailors, being +ordered suddenly to Quebec. I ran round to say adieu to all my dear +Arcadian friends. A tearful eye, a lock of hair, a hearty shake of a +fair hand, were all the spoils with which I was loaded when I quitted +the shore, and I cast many a longing, lingering look behind, as the +ship glided out of the harbour; white handkerchiefs were waved from +the beach, and many a silent prayer put up for our safe return from +snowy bosoms and from aching hearts. I dispensed my usual quantum of +vows of eternal love and fidelity before I left them, and my departure +was marked in the calendar of Halifax as a black day, by at least +seven or eight pairs of blue eyes. + +We had not been long at sea before we spoke an Irish Guineaman from +Belfast, loaded with emigrants for the United States: I think about +seventeen families. These were contraband. Our captain had some twenty +thousand acres on the island of St John's, or Prince Edward's, as +it is now called, a grant to some of his ancestors, which had been +bequeathed to him, and from which he had never received one shilling +of rent, for the very best reason in the world, because there were no +tenants to cultivate the soil. It occurred to our noble captain, that +this was the very sort of cargo he wanted, and that these Irish people +would make good clearers of his land, and improve his estate. He made +the proposal to them, and as they saw no chance of getting to the +United States, and provided they could procure nourishment for +their families, it was a matter of indifference to them where they +colonised, the proposal was accepted, and the captain obtained +permission of the admiral to accompany them to the island, to see them +housed and settled. Indeed, nothing could have been more advantageous +for all parties; they increased the scanty population of our own +colony, instead of adding to the number of our enemies. We sailed +again from Halifax a few hours after we had obtained the sanction of +the admiral, and, passing through the beautiful passage between Nova +Scotia and the island of Cape Breton, known by the name of the Gut of +Canso, we soon reached Prince Edward's Island. + +We anchored in a small harbour near the estate, on which we found a +man residing with his wife and family; this fellow called himself the +steward, and from all I could see of him during our three weeks' stay, +he appeared to me to be rascal enough for the stewardship of any +nobleman's estate in England. The captain landed, and took me as his +aide-de-camp. A bed was prepared for his lordship in the steward's +house, but he preferred sleeping on clean hay in the barn. This noble +lord was a man whose thoughts seldom gave much labour to his tongue; +he always preferred hearing others to talking himself; and whoever was +his companion, he must always be at the expense of the conversation. +Nor was it by the usual mode of simple narrative, that his mind was +completely impressed with the image intended to be presented to him; +he required three different versions, or paraphrases, of the same +story or observation, and to these he had three different expletives +or ejaculations. These were hum! eh! and ah! The first denoted +attention; the second, part comprehension; and the third, assent and +entire approval; to mark which more distinctly, the last syllable was +drawn out to an immoderate length, and accompanied by a sort of half +laugh. + +I shall give one instance of our colloquial pastime. His lordship, +after we had each taken up our quarters for the night, on the soft dry +hay, thus began: + +"I say,"--a pause. + +"My lord?" + +"What would they say in England, at our taking up such quarters?" + +"I think, my lord, that as far as regards myself, they would say +nothing; but as far as regards your lordship, they would say it was +very indifferent accommodation for a nobleman." + +"Hum!" + +This I knew was the signal for a new version. "I was observing, my +lord, that a person of your rank, taking up his quarters in a barn, +would excite suspicion among your friends in England." + +"Eh?" says his lordship. + +That did not do--either your lordship's head or mine is very thick, +thinks I. I'll try again, though dying to go to sleep. "I say, my +lord, if the people in England knew what a good sailor you are, they +would be surprised at nothing you did; but those who know nothing, +would think it odd that you should be contented with such quarters." + +"Ah!" said his lordship, triumphantly. + +What further observations he was pleased to make that night I know +not, for I fell fast asleep, and did not awake till the cocks and hens +began to fly down from their roosts, and make a confounded clamour for +their breakfasts, when his lordship jumped up, gave himself a good +shake, and then gave me another of a different sort: it announced +the purpose, however, of restoring me to that reason, of which the +cackling of the poultry had only produced the incipient signs. + +"Come, rouse out, you d----- lazy chap," said my captain. "Do you mean +to sleep all day? we have got plenty to do." + +"Ay, ay, my lord," said I. So up I jumped, and my toilet was completed +in the same time, and by the same operation, as that of a Newfoundland +dog, namely, a good shake. + +A large party of the ship's company came on shore with the carpenter, +bringing with them every implement useful in cutting down trees and +building log-houses. Such was to be our occupation, in order to house +these poor emigrants. Our men began to clear a patch of land, by +cutting down a number of pine-trees, the almost exclusive natives of +the wood, and, having selected a spot for the foundation, we placed +four stems of trees in a parallelogram, having a deep notch in each +end, mutually to fit and embrace each other. When the walls, by this +repeated operation, were high enough, we laid on the rafters, +and covered the roof with boughs of the fir, and the bark of the +birch-tree, filling the interstices with moss and mud. By practice, I +became a very expert engineer, and with the assistance of thirty or +forty men, I could build a very good house in a day. + +We next cleared, by burning and rooting up, as much land as would +serve to sustain the little colony for the ensuing season; and having +planted a crop of corn and potatoes, and given the settlers many +articles useful in their new abode, we left them agreeably to our +orders, and to my great joy returned to dear Halifax where I again was +blessed with the sight of my innocent harem. I remember well that I +received a severe rebuke from the captain for inattention to signals. +One was addressed to us from the flag-ship; I was signal midshipman; +but instead of directing my glass towards the old _Centurion_, it was +levelled at a certain young Calypso, whose fair form I discovered +wandering along the "_gazon fleuris_:" how long would I not have dwelt +in this happy Arcadia, had not another Mentor pushed me off the rocks, +and sent me once more to buffet the briny waves! + +Contrary to the opinion of any rational being, the President of the +United States was planning a war against England, and every ship in +Halifax harbour was preparing to fight the Yankees. The squadron +sailed in September. I bade adieu to the nymphs of Nova Scotia with +more indifference than became me, or than the reception I had met with +from them seemed to deserve; but I was the same selfish and ungrateful +being as ever. I cared for no one but my own dear self, and as long +as I was gratified, it mattered little to me how many broken hearts I +left behind. + + + + +Chapter XIV + + At once the winds arise, + The thunders roll, the forky lightning flies; + In vain the master issues out commands, + In vain the trembling sailors ply their hands: + The tempest unforeseen prevents their care, + And from the first, they labour in despair. + + Dryden's "_Fables_." + + +Halifax is a charming, hospitable place: its name is associated with +so many pleasing recollections, that it never fails to extort another +glass from the bottle which, having been gagged, was going to pass the +night in the cellaret. But only say Halifax! and it is like "Open +sesame!"--out flies the cork, and down goes a bumper to the "health of +all good lasses!" + +I related, in the last chapter, an adventure with an Irish Guineaman, +whose cargo my right honourable captain converted to the profitable +uses of himself and his country. Another of these vessels had been +fallen in with by one of our cruisers, and the commander of His +Majesty's sloop, the _Humming Bird_, made a selection of some thirty +or forty stout Hibernians to fill up his own complement, and hand over +the surplus to the admiral. + +Short-sighted mortals we all are, and captains of men-of-war are not +exempted from this human imperfection! How much, also, drops between +the cup and the lip! There chanced to be on board of the same trader +two very pretty Irish girls of the better sort of _bourgeoisie_; they +were going to join their friends at Philadelphia: the name of the one +was Judy, and of the other Maria. No sooner were the poor Irishmen +informed of their change of destination, than they set up a howl loud +enough to make the scaly monsters of the deep seek their dark caverns. +They rent the hearts of the poor tender-hearted girls; and when the +thorough bass of the males was joined by the sopranos and trebles of +the women and children, it would have made Orpheus himself turn round +and gaze. + +"Oh, Miss Judy! Oh, Miss Maria! would ye be so cruel as to see us poor +craturs dragged away to a man-of-war, and not for to go and spake a +word for us? A word to the captain wid your own pretty mouths, no +doubt he would let us off." + +The young ladies, though doubting the powers of their own +fascinations, resolved to make the experiment; so, begging the +lieutenant of the sloop to give them a passage on board, to speak with +his captain, they added a small matter of finery to their dress, and +skipped into the boat like a couple of mountain kids, caring neither +for the exposure of legs nor the spray of the salt water, which, +though it took the curls out of their hair, added a bloom to the +cheeks which, perhaps, contributed in no small degree to the success +of their project. + +There is something in the sight of a petticoat at sea that never fails +to put a man into a good humour, provided he be rightly constructed. +When they got on board the _Humming Bird_, they were received by the +captain, and handed down into the cabin, where some refreshments were +immediately prepared for them, and every kind attention shown which +their sex and beauty could demand. The captain was one of the best +natured fellows that ever lived, with a pair of little sparkling black +eyes that laughed in your face. + +"And pray, young ladies," said he, "what may have procured me the +honour of this visit?" + +"It was to beg a favour of your honour," said Judy. + +"And his honour will grant it, too," said Maria; "for I like the look +of him." + +Flattered by this little shot of Maria's, the captain said that +nothing ever gave him more pleasure than to oblige the ladies; and if +the favour they intended to ask was not utterly incompatible with his +duty, that he would grant it. + +"Well then," said Maria, "will your honour give me back Pat Flannagan, +that you have pressed just now?" + +The captain shook his head. + +"He's no sailor, your honour; but a poor bog-trotter: and he will +never do you any good." + +The captain again shook his head. + +"Ask me anything else," said he, "and I will give it you." + +"Well then," said Maria, "give us Felim O'Shaugnessy?" + +The captain was equally inflexible. + +"Come, come, your honour," said Judy, "we must not stand upon trifles +nowadays. I'll give you a kiss, if you'll give me Pat Flannagan." + +"And I another," said Maria, "for Felim." + +The captain had one seated on each side of him; his head turned like a +dog-vane in a gale of wind; he did not know which to begin with; the +most ineffable good humour danced in his eyes, and the ladies saw at +once that the day was their own. Such is the power of beauty, that +this lord of the ocean was fain to strike to it. Judy laid a kiss on +his right cheek; Maria matched it on his left; the captain was the +happiest of mortals. + +"Well, then," said he, "you have your wish; take your two men, for I +am in a hurry to make sail." + +"Is it sail ye are after making; and do ye mane to take all those +pretty craturs away wid ye? No, faith! another kiss, and another man." + +I am not going to relate how many kisses these lovely girls bestowed +on this envied captain. If such are captain's perquisites, who would +not be a captain? Suffice it to say, they released the whole of their +countrymen, and returned on board in triumph. The story reached +Halifax, where the good-humoured admiral only said he was sorry he was +not a captain, and all the happy society made themselves very merry +with it. The captain, who is as brave as he is good, was promoted soon +after, entirely from his own intrinsic merit, but not for this action, +in which candour and friendship must acknowledge he was defeated. The +Lord-Chancellor used to say, he always laughed at the settlement of +pin-money, as ladies were either kicked out of it or kissed out of it; +but his lordship, in the whole course of his legal practice, never saw +a captain of a man-of-war kissed out of forty men by two pretty Irish +girls. After this, who would not shout, "_Erin go bragh_!" + +Dashing with a fine breeze out of the harbour, I saw with joy the +field of fortune open to me, holding out a fair promise of glory and +riches. "Adieu!" said I, in my heart, "adieu, ye lovely Nova Scotians! +learn in future to distinguish between false glitter and real worth. +Me ye prized for a handsome person and a smooth tongue, while you +foolishly rejected men of ten times my worth, because they wanted the +outward blandishments." + +We were ordered to Bermuda, and on our first quitting the port steered +away to the southward with a fair wind at north-west. This breeze soon +freshened into a gale at south-east, and blew with some violence, but +after a while it died away to a perfect calm, leaving a heavy swell, +in which the ship rolled incessantly. About eleven o'clock the sky +began to blacken; and, before noon, had assumed an appearance of the +most dismal and foreboding darkness; the sea-gulls screamed as they +flew distractedly by, warning us to prepare for the approaching +hurricane, whose symptoms could hardly be mistaken. The warning was +not lost upon us, most of our sails were taken in, and we had, as we +thought, so well secured everything, as to bid defiance to the storm. +About noon it came with a sudden and terrific violence that astonished +the oldest and most experienced seaman among us: the noise it made was +horrible, and its ravages inconceivable. + +The wind was from the north-west--the water as it blew on board, and +all over us, was warm as milk; the murkiness and close smell of the +air was in a short time dispelled; but such was the violence of the +wind, that, on the moment of its striking the ship, she lay over on +her side with her lee guns under water. Every article that could move +was danced to leeward; the shot flew out of the lockers, and the +greatest confusion and dismay prevailed below, while above deck things +went still worse; the mizen-mast and the fore and main topmast went +over the side; but such was the noise of the wind, that we could not +hear them fall; nor did I, who was standing close to the mizen-mast at +the moment, know it was gone, until I turned round and saw the stump +of the mast snapped in two like a carrot. The noise of the wind "waxed +louder and louder;" it was like one continued peal of thunder; and the +enormous waves as they rose were instantly beheaded by its fury, +and sent in foaming spray along the bosom of the deep; the storm +stay-sails flew to atoms; the captain, officers, and men, stood +aghast, looking at each other, and waiting the awful event in utter +amazement. + +The ship lay over on her larboard side so heavily as to force in the +gun ports, and the nettings of the waist hammocks, and seemed as if +settling bodily down; while large masses of water, by the force of the +wind, were whirled up into the air; and others were pouring down the +hatchways, which we had not had time to batten down, and before we had +succeeded, the lower deck was half full, and the chests and hammocks +were all floating about in dreadful disorder. The sheep, cow, pigs, +and poultry, were all washed overboard out of the waist and drowned; +no voice could be heard, and no orders were given; all discipline was +suspended; every man was equal to his neighbour; captain and sweeper +clung alike to the same rope for security. + +The carpenter was for cutting away the masts, but the captain would +not consent. A seaman crawled aft on the quarter-deck, and screaming +into the ear of the captain, informed him that one of the anchors had +broke adrift, and was hanging by the cable under the bows. To have let +it remain long in this situation, was certain destruction to the ship, +and I was ordered forward to see it cut away; but so much had the +gale and the sea increased in a few minutes, that a passage to the +forecastle was not to be found: on the weather side, the wind and sea +were so violent that no man could face them. I was blown against the +boats, and with difficulty got back to the quarter-deck; and going +over to leeward, I swam along the gangway under the lee of the boats, +and delivered the orders, which with infinite difficulty at last were +executed. + +On the forecastle, I found the oldest and stoutest seamen holding on +by the weather rigging, and crying like children: I was surprised at +this, and felt proud to be above such weakness. While my superiors in +age and experience were sinking under apprehension, I was aware of our +danger; and saw very clearly, that if the frigate did not right +very shortly, it would be all over with us; for in spite of our +precautions, the water was increasing below. I swam back to the +quarter-deck, where the captain, who was as brave a man as ever trod a +plank, stood at the wheel with three of the best seamen; but such were +the rude shocks which the rudder received from the sea, that it was +with the utmost difficulty they could prevent themselves being thrown +over the ship's side. The lee quarter-deck guns were under water; but +it was proposed to throw them overboard; and as it was a matter of +life and death, we succeeded. Still she lay like a log, and would not +right, and settled down in a very alarming manner. The violence of +the hurricane was unabated, and the general feeling seemed be, "To +prayers!--to prayers!--all lost!" + +The fore and main-masts still stood, supporting the weight of rigging +and wreck which hung to them, and which, like a powerful lever, +pressed the labouring ship down on her side. To disengage this +enormous top hamper, was to us an object more to be desired than +expected. Yet the case was desperate, and a desperate effort was to be +made, or in half an hour we should have been past praying for, except +by a Roman Catholic priest. The danger of sending a man aloft was so +imminent, that the captain would not order one on this service; +but calling the ship's company on the quarter-deck, pointed to +the impending wreck, and by signs and gestures, and hard bawling, +convinced them that unless the ship was immediately eased of her +burden, she must go down. + +At this moment every wave seemed to make a deeper and more fatal +impression on her. She descended rapidly in the hollows of the sea, +and rose with dull and exhausted motion, as if she felt she could do +no more. She was worn out in the contest, and about to surrender, +like a noble and battered fortress, to the overwhelming power of her +enemies. The men seemed stupefied with the danger; and I have no +doubt, could they have got at the spirits, would have made themselves +drunk; and in that state, have met their inevitable fate. At every +lurch, the mainmast appeared as if making the most violent efforts +to disengage itself from the ship: the weather shrouds became +like straight bars of iron, while the lee shrouds hung over in a +semi-circle to leeward, or with the weather-roll, banged against +the mast, and threatened instant destruction, each moment, from the +convulsive jerks. We expected to see the mast fall, and with it the +side of the ship to be beat in. No man could be found daring enough, +at the captain's request, to venture aloft, and cut away the wreck of +the main-top mast, and the main-yard, which was hanging up and down, +with the weight of the top-mast and topsail yard resting upon it. +There was a dead and stupid pause, while the hurricane, if any thing, +increased in violence. + +I confess that I felt gratified at this acknowledgment of a danger +which none dare face. I waited a few seconds, to see if a volunteer +would step forward, resolved, if he did, that I would be his enemy for +life, inasmuch as he would have robbed me of the gratification of my +darling passion--unbounded pride. Dangers, in common with others, I +had often faced, and been the first to encounter; but to dare that +which a gallant and hardy crew of a frigate had declined, was a climax +of superiority which I had never dreamed of attaining. Seizing a sharp +tomahawk, I made signs to the captain that I would attempt to cut away +the wreck, follow me who dared. I mounted the weather-rigging; five +or six hardy seamen followed me; sailors will rarely refuse to follow +where they find an officer to lead the way. + +The jerks of the rigging had nearly thrown us overboard, or jammed us +with the wreck. We were forced to embrace the shrouds with arms and +legs; and anxiously, and with breathless apprehension for our lives, +did the captain, officers, and crew, gaze on us as we mounted, and +cheered us at every stroke of the tomahawk. The danger seemed passed +when we reached the catharpens, where we had foot room. We divided our +work, some took the lanyards of the topmast rigging, I, the slings +of the main-yard. The lusty blows we dealt, were answered by +corresponding crashes; and at length, down fell the tremendous wreck +over the larboard gunwale. The ship felt instant relief; she +righted, and we descended amidst the cheers, the applauses, the +congratulations, and, I may add, the tears of gratitude, of most of +our shipmates. The work now become lighter, the gale abated every +moment, the wreck was gradually cleared away, and we forgot our cares. + +This was the proudest moment of my life, and no earthly possession +would I have taken in exchange for what I felt when I once more placed +my foot on the quarter-deck. The approving smile of the captain--the +hearty shake by the hand--the praises of the officers--the eager gaze +of the ship's company, who looked on me with astonishment and obeyed +me with alacrity, were something in my mind, when abstractedly +considered, but nothing compared to the inward feeling of gratified +ambition, a passion so intimately interwoven in my existence, that +to have eradicated it, the whole fabric of my frame must have been +demolished. I felt pride justified. + +Hurricanes are rarely of long continuance; this was succeeded by a +gale, which, though strong, was fine weather compared to what we +had seen. We fell to work rigged our jury-mast, and in a few days +presented ourselves to the welcome gaze of the town of Halifax, +which, having felt the full force of the hurricane, expressed very +considerable alarm for our safety. My arms and legs did not recover +for some time from the effects of the bruises I had received in going +aloft, and for some days I remained on board. When I recovered I went +on shore, and was kindly and affectionately received by my numerous +friends. + +I had not been long at Halifax, before a sudden change took place +in the behaviour of my captain towards me. The cause I could never +exactly discover, though I had given myself some room for conjecture. +I must confess, with sorrow, that notwithstanding his kindness to me +on every occasion, and notwithstanding my high respect for him, as an +officer and a gentleman, I had raised a laugh against him. But he +was too good-humoured a man to be offended at such a harmless act of +youthful levity; and five minutes were usually the limits of anger +with this amiable man, on such occasions as I am about to relate. + +The fact was this; my truly noble captain sported a remarkable wide +pair of blue trowsers. Whether he thought it sailor-like, or whether +his tailor was afraid of putting his lordship to short allowance of +cloth, for fear of phlogistic consequences, I know not; but broad +as was the beam of his lordship, still broader and more ample in +proportion were the folds of this essential part of his drapery, quite +enough to have embraced twice the volume of human flesh contained +within them, large as it undoubtedly was. + +That "a stitch in time saves nine," is a wise saw; unhappily, like +many others of the same thrifty kind, but little heeded in this our +day. So it was with Lord Edward. A rent had, by some mischance been +made in the central seam, and, on the morning of the hurricane, was +still unmended. When the gale came, it sought a quarrel with any thing +it could lay hold of, and the harmless trowsers of Lord Edward became +subject to its mighty and resistless devastation; the blustering +Boreas entered by the seam aforesaid, and filled the trowsers like the +cheeks of a trumpeter. Yorkshire wool could not stand the inflated +pressure--the dress split to ribbons, and soundly flagellated the very +part it was intended to conceal. What could he do, "in sweet confusion +lost and dubious _flutterings_"--the only defence left against the +rude blast, was his shirt (for the weather was so warm that second +garments were dispensed with), and this too being old, fled in tatters +before the gale. In short, clap a sailor's jacket on the Gladiator in +Hyde-park, and you have a fair view of Lord Edward in the hurricane. + +The case was inconvenient enough; but as the ship was in distress, and +we all expected to go to the bottom in half an hour, it was not worth +while to quit the deck to replace the dress, which would have availed +him nothing in the depths of the sea, particularly as we were not +likely to meet with any ladies there; nor if there had been any, was +it a matter of any moment whether we went to Davy's Locker with or +without breeches; but when the danger was passed, the joke began to +appear, and I was amusing a large company with the _tale_ when his +lordship came in. The titter of the ladies increased to a giggle, and +then, by regular gradation, to a loud and uncontrollable laugh. He +very soon discovered that he was the subject, and I the cause, and for +a minute or two seemed sulky; but it soon went off, and I cannot think +this was the reason of his change of sentiments; for, although it is +high treason in a midshipman to look black at the captain's dog, much +less to laugh at the captain under any circumstances, still I knew +that my captain was too good a fellow to be offended with such a +trifle. I rather suspect I was wished out of the ship by the first +lieutenant and gun-room officers; and they were right, for where an +inferior officer is popular with the men, discipline must suffer from +it. I received a good-natured hint from Lord Edward, that another +captain, in a larger frigate, would be happy to receive me. I +understood him; we parted good friends, and I shall ever think of him +with respect and gratitude. + +My new captain was a very different sort of man, refined in his +manner, a scholar and a gentleman. Kind and friendly with his +officers, his library was at their disposal; the fore-cabin, where his +books were usually kept, was open to all; it was the school-room +of the young midshipmen, and the study of the old ones. He was +an excellent draughtsman, and I profited not a little by his +instructions; he loved the society of the ladies, so did I; but he +being a married man was more select in his company, and more correct +in his conduct than I could pretend to be. + +We were ordered to Quebec, sailed through the beautiful Gut of Canso, +and up the spacious and majestic St Lawrence, passing in sight of the +Island of Anticosta. Nothing material occurred during the passage, +save that a Scotch surgeon's-assistant, having adopted certain +aristocratic notions, required a democratical lecture on heads, which +was duly administered to him. He pretended that he was, by birth and +education (at Edinburgh), entitled to be at the head of our mess. This +I resisted, and soon taught the ambitious son of Esculapius that the +science of defence was as important as the art of healing; and that +if he was skilful in this latter, I would give him an opportunity of +employing it on his own person: whereupon I implanted on his cinciput, +occiput, os frontis, os nasi, and all other vulnerable parts of +his body, certain concussions calculated to stupify and benumb +the censorium, and to produce under each eye a quantity of black +extravasated blood; while, at the same time, a copious stream of +carmine fluid issued from either nostril. It was never my habit to +bully or take any unfair advantage; so, having perceived a cessation +of arms on his part, I put the usual interrogatives as to whether the +party contending was satisfied; and being answered in the affirmative, +I laid by my metacarpal bones until they might be farther wanted, +either for reproof or correction. + +We anchored off Cape Diamond, which divides the St Lawrence from the +little river St Charles. The continuation of this cape, as it recedes, +forms the Heights of Abraham, on which the immortal Wolfe defeated +Montcalm, in the year 1759, when both the generals ended their +glorious career on the field of battle. The city stands on the +extremity of the cape, and has a very romantic appearance. The houses +and churches are generally covered with tin, to prevent conflagration, +to which this place was remarkably subject when the houses were +covered with thatch or shingle. When the rays of the sun lay on the +buildings, they had the appearance of being cased in silver. + +One of our objects in going to Quebec was to procure men, of which the +squadron was very deficient. Our seamen and marines were secretly +and suddenly formed into press-gangs. The command of one of them was +conferred on me. The officers and marines went on shore in disguise, +having agreed on private signals and places of rendezvous; while the +seamen on whom we could depend, acted as decoy ducks, pretending to +belong to merchant vessels, of which their officer was the master, +and inducing them to engage, for ten gallons of rum and three hundred +dollars, to take the run home. Many were procured in this manner, +and were not undeceived until they found themselves alongside of the +frigate, when their oaths and execrations may be better conceived than +described or repeated. + +It may be proper to explain here that the vessels employed in the +timber trade arrive in the month of June, as soon as the ice is +clear of the river, and, if they do not sail by or before the end of +October, are usually set fast in the ice, and forced to winter in the +St Lawrence, losing their voyage, and lying seven or eight months +idle. Aware of this, the sailors, as soon as they arrive, desert, and +are secreted and fed by the crimps, who make their market of them in +the fall of the year by selling them to the captains; procuring for +the men an exorbitant sum for the voyage home, and for themselves a +handsome _douceur_ for their trouble, both from the captain and the +sailor. + +We were desired not to take men out of the merchant vessels, but to +search for them in the houses of the crimps. This was to us a source +of great amusement and singular adventure; for the ingenuity in +concealing them was only equalled by the art and cunning exercised in +the discovery of their abodes. Cellars and lofts were stale and out of +use; we found more game in the interior of haystacks, church steeples, +closets under fireplaces where the fire was burning. Some we found +headed up in sugar-hogsheads, and some concealed within bundles of +hoop-staves. Sometimes we found seamen, dressed as gentlemen, drinking +wine and talking with the greatest familiarity with people much +above them in rank, who had used these means to conceal them. Our +information led us to detect these excusable impositions. + +I went into the country, about fifteen miles from Quebec, where I had +heard of a crimp's preserve, and after a tedious search, discovered +some good seamen on the rafters of an outhouse intended only to +smoke and cure bacon; and as the fires were lighted, and the smoke +ascending, it was difficult to conceive a human being could exist +there: nor should we have discovered them if one of them had not +coughed; on which he received the execrations of the others, and the +whole party was instantly handed out. We immediately cut the strings +of their trowsers behind, to prevent their running away, (this ought +never to be omitted), and, placing them and ourselves in the farmer's +waggon, made him put his team to and drive us all to Quebec, the +new-raised men joining with our own in all the jokes which flew thick +about on the occasion of their discovery. It was astonishing to me how +easily these fine fellows reconciled themselves to the thoughts of a +man-of-war; perhaps the approaching row with the Yankees tended very +much to preserve good humour. I became an enthusiast in man-hunting, +although sober reflection has since convinced me of its cruelty, +injustice, and inexpediency, tending to drive seamen from the country +more than any measure the government could adopt; but I am not going +to write a treatise on impressment. I cared not one farthing about the +liberty of the subject, as long as I got my ship well manned for the +impending conflict; and as I gratified my love of adventure, I was as +thoughtless of the consequences as when I rode over a farmer's turnips +in England, or broke through his hedges in pursuit of a fox. + +A tradesman at Quebec had affronted me, by refusing to discount a bill +which I had drawn on my father. I had no other means of paying him for +the goods I had purchased of him, and was much disconcerted at his +refusal, which he accompanied with an insult to myself and my cloth, +never to be forgotten. Turning the paper over and over, he said, "a +midshipman's bill is not worth a farthing, and I am too old a bird to +be caught with such chaff." + +Conscious that the bill was good, I vowed revenge. My search-warrant +enabled me to go wherever I could get information of men being +concealed--this was easily obtained from a brother mid (the poor man +might as well have been in the hands of the holy brotherhood). My +companion stated his firm conviction that sailors were concealed in +the house; I applied to the captain, and received orders to proceed +by all means in execution of my duty. The tradesman was a man of +consequence in Quebec, being what is there called a large storekeeper, +though we in England should have called him a shopkeeper. About one +o'clock in the morning we hammered at his door with no gentle tap, +demanding admittance in the name of our sovereign lord the king. We +were refused, and forthwith broke open the door, and spread over his +house like a nest of cockroaches. Cellars, garrets, maids' room, +ladies' rooms, we entered, _sans ceremonie_; paid little regard to +the Medicean costume of the fair occupants; broke some of the most +indispensable articles of bedroom furniture; rattled the pots and pans +about in the kitchen; and, finding the two sons of the master of the +house, ordered them to dress and come with us, certain, we said, that +they were sailors. + +When the old tradesman saw me he began to smell a rat, and threatened +me with severe punishment. I shewed him my search-warrant, and asked +him if it was a _good bill_. After having inspected every part of the +house, I departed, leaving the two young cubs half dead with fear. +The next day, a complaint was lodged at the government-house; but +investigation is a long word when a man-of-war is ordered on service. +Despatches from Albany reached Quebec, stating that the President of +the United States had declared war against England; in consequence of +which, our captain took leave of the governor, and dropped down the +river with all speed, so I never heard any more of my tradesman. + +We arrived at Halifax full manned, and immediately received orders to +proceed to sea, "to sink, burn, and destroy." We ran for Boston bay, +when, on the morning we made the land, we discovered ten or twelve +sail of merchant vessels. The first we boarded was a brig; one of our +boats was lowered down; I got into her, and jumped on the deck of the +Yankee, while the frigate continued in chase of the others. The master +of the vessel sat on a hen-coop, and did not condescend to rise or +offer me the least salute as I passed him; he was a short, thick, +paunchy-looking fellow. + +"You are an Englishman, I guess?" + +"I guess I am," I said, imitating him with a nasal twang. + +"I thought we shouldn't be long in our waters afore we met some of you +old-country sarpents. No harm in what I've said, I hope?" added the +master. + +"Oh, no," said I, "not the least; it will make no difference in the +long run. But where do you come from, and where are you bound?" + +"Come from Smyrna, and bound to Boston, where I hope to be to-morrow +morning, by the blessing of God, and a good conscience." + +From this answer, I perceived that he was unacquainted with the war, +and I therefore determined to play with him a little before I gave him +the fatal news. + +"And pray," said I, "what might your cargo consist of? you appear to +be light." + +"Not so light neither, I guess," said the man; "we have sweet oil, +raisins, and what we calls notions." + +"I have no notion," said I, "what they might be. Pray explain +yourself." + +"Why, you see, notions is what we call a little of all sorts like. +Some likes one thing, you know, and some another: some likes sweet +almonds, and some likes silk, and some likes opium, and some" (he +added, with a cunning grin) "likes dollars." + +"And are these the notions with which you are loaded?" said I. + +"I guess they are," replied Jonathan. + +"And what might your outward cargo have been?" said I. + +"Salt fish, flour, and tobacco," was his answer. + +"And is this all you have in return?" I asked. "I thought the Smyrna +trade had been a very good one." + +"Well, so it is," said the unwary Yankee. "Thirty thousand dollars +in the cabin, besides the oil and the rest of the goods, an't no bad +thing." + +"I am very glad to hear of the dollars," said I. + +"What odds does that make to you?" said the captain; "it won't be much +on 'em as'll come to your share." + +"More than you may think," said I. "Have you heard the news as you +came along?" + +At the word "news," the poor man's face became the colour of one in +the jaundice. "What news?" said he, in a state of trepidation that +hardly admitted of utterance. + +"Why, only that your president, Mr Madison, has thought fit to declare +war against England." + +"You're only a joking?" said the captain. + +"I give you my word of honour I am serious," said I; "and your vessel +is a prize to his Britannic majesty's ship, the ----." + +The poor man fetched a sigh from the waistband of his trowsers. "I am +a ruined man," said he. "I only wish I'd known a little sooner of the +war you talk about: I've got two nice little guns there forward; you +shouldn't a had me so easily." + +I smiled at his idea of resistance against a fast-sailing frigate of +fifty guns; but left him in the full enjoyment of his conceit, and +changing the subject, asked if he had any thing he could give us to +drink, for the weather was very warm. + +"No, I ha'n't," he replied, peevishly; "and if I had--" + +"Come, come, my good fellow," said I, "you forget you are a prize; +civility is a cheap article, and may bring you a quick return." + +"That's true," said Jonathan, who was touched on the nicest +point--self; "that's true, you are only a doing your duty. Here, boy, +fetch up that ere demi John of Madeira, and for aught I know, the +young officer might like a drop o' long cork; bring us some tumblers, +and one o' they claret bottles out o' the starboard after locker." + +The boy obeyed--and the articles quickly appeared. While this dialogue +was going on, the frigate was in chase, firing guns, and bringing-to +the different vessels as she passed them, dropping a boat on board of +one, and making sail after another. We stood after her with all the +sail we could conveniently carry. + +"Pray," said the captain, "might I offer you a bit of something to +eat? I guess you ha'n't dined yet, as it isn't quite meridian." + +I thanked him, and accepted his offer: he ran down instantly to the +cabin, as if to prepare for my reception; but I rather thought he +wished to place some articles out of my sight, and this proved to be +the case, for he stole a bag of dollars out of the cargo. In a short +time, I was invited down. A leg of cured pork, and a roasted fowl, +were very acceptable to a midshipman at any time, but particularly +so to me; and, when accompanied by a few glasses of the Madeira, the +barometer of my spirits rose in proportion to the depression of his. + +"Come, captain," said I, filling a bumper of claret, "here's to a long +and bloody war." + +"D----n the dog that won't say amen to that," said the master; "but +where do you mean to carry me to? I guess to Halifax. Sha'n't I have +my clothes, and my own private _venter_?" + +"All your private property," said I, "will be held sacred; but your +vessel and cargo are ours." + +"Well, well," said the man, "I know that; but if you behave well to +me, you sha'n't find I'm ungrateful. Let me have my things, and I'll +give you a bit o' news, as will be of sarvice to you." + +He then told me, on my promising him his private venture, that we had +not a moment to lose, for that a vessel, just visible on the horizon, +was from Smyrna, richly laden; she was commanded by a townsman of his, +and bound to the same place. I turned from him with contempt, and at +the same moment made the signal to speak the frigate. On going on +board, I told the captain what I had heard from the master of the +prize, and the promise I had given. He approved of it; the proper +number of men were instantly sent back to the brig, the prisoners +taken out, and the frigate made sail in chase of the indicated vessel, +which she captured that night at nine o'clock. + +I would not willingly believe that such perfidy is common among the +Americans. On parting with the master of my brig, a sharp dialogue +took place between us. + +"I guess I'll fit out a privateer, and take some o' your merchanters." + +"Take care you are not taken yourself," said I, "and pass your time +on board one of our prison ships; but, remember, whatever may happen, +it's all your own fault. You have picked a German quarrel with us, to +please Boney; and he will only spit in your face when you have done +your best for him. Your wise president has declared war against the +mother country." + +"D----n the mother country," muttered the Yankee; "step-mother, I guess, +you mean, tarnation seize her!!!" + +We continued following the ship, and by night-time the frigate had +secured eight prizes; one of them being a brig in ballast, the +prisoners were put on board of her, my Yankee friend among the number, +and turned adrift, to find their way home. We took care to give to all +of them their private ventures and their clothes. I was in hopes of +being allowed to go to Halifax with my prize; but the captain, knowing +how I was likely to pass my time, kept me with him. We cruised two +months, taking many privateers, some large and some small; some we +burned, and some we scuttled. + +One day we had one of these craft alongside, and having taken every +thing out of her that was worth moving, we very imprudently set her +on fire before she was clear of the ship's side; and as we were on +a wind, it was some minutes before we could get her clear. In the +meantime the fire began to blaze up in a very alarming manner under +the mizzen chains, where, by the attraction of the two floating +bodies, she seemed resolved to continue; but on our putting the helm +up, and giving the vessel a sheer the contrary way, as soon as we were +before the wind, she parted from us, to our great joy, and was soon in +a volume of flame. Our reason for setting her on fire alongside was to +save time, as we wanted to go in chase of another vessel, seen from +the mast-head, and lowering a boat down to destroy this vessel would +have detained us. + +Before the end of the cruise, we chased a schooner, which ran on shore +and bilged; we boarded her, brought away her crew and part of her +cargo, which was very valuable. She was from Bordeaux, bound to +Philadelphia. I was sent to examine her, and endeavour to bring away +more of her cargo. The tide rising in her, we were compelled to rip up +her decks, and discovered that she was laden with bales of silk, broad +cloths, watches, clocks, laces, silk stockings, wine, brandy, bars of +steel, olive-oil, &c, &c. I sent word of this to the captain; and +the carpenter and plenty of assistants arriving, we rescued a great +quantity of the goods from the deep or the Yankee boats, who would +soon have been on board after we left her. We could perceive in the +hold some cases, but they were at least four feet under water. It was +confoundedly cold; but I thought there was something worth diving for, +so down I went, and contrived to keep myself long enough under water +to hook one end of a case, by which means we broke it out and got it +up. It was excellent claret, and we were not withheld from drinking it +by any scruples of conscience; for if I had not dived for it, it +would never have come to the mouth of an Englishman. We discussed a +three-dozen case among just so many of us, in a reasonable short +time; and as it was October, we felt no ill effects from a frequent +repetition of the dose. + +I never felt colder, and diving requires much stimulant. From practice +at this work, I could pick up pins and needles in a clear, sandy +bottom; and, considering the density of the medium, could live like a +beaver under water; but I required ample fees for my trouble. When we +returned on board, we were very wet and cold, and the wine took no +effect on us; but as soon as we thawed, like the horn of the great +Munchausen, the secret escaped, for we were all tipsy. The captain +inquired the cause of this the next day, and I very candidly told him +the whole history. He was wise enough to laugh at it; some captains +would have flogged every one of the men, and disgraced the officers. + +On our return into port, I requested permission to go to England in +order to pass my examination as lieutenant, having nearly completed +my servitude as a midshipman. I was asked to remain out, and take my +chance for promotion in the flag-ship; but more reasons than I chose +to give, induced me to prefer an examination at a sea-port in England, +and I obtained my discharge and came home. The reader will no doubt +give me credit for having written some dozen of letters to Eugenia: +youth, beauty, and transient possession had still preserved my +attachment to her unabated. Emily I had heard of, and still loved +with a purer flame. She was my sun; Eugenia my moon; and the fair +favourites of the western hemisphere, so many twinkling stars of the +first, second, and third magnitude. I loved them all more or less; but +all their charms vanished, when the beauteous Emily shone in my breast +with refulgent light. + +I had received letters from my father, who wished me to come home, +that he might present me to some of the great men of the nation, and +secure my promotion to the highest ranks of the service. This advice +was good, and, as it suited my views, I followed it. I parted with +my captain on the best terms, took leave of all my messmates and the +officers in the same friendly manner, and last, not least, went round +to the ladies, kissing, hugging, crying, and swearing love and eternal +attachment. Nothing, I declared, should keep me from Halifax, as soon +as I had passed; nothing prevent my marrying one, as soon as I was a +lieutenant; a second was to have the connubial knot tied when I was a +commander; and a third, as soon as I was made a captain. Oh, how like +was I to Don Galaor! Oh, how unlike the constant Amadis de Gaul! But, +reader, you must take me as I was, not as I ought to have been. + +After a passage of six weeks, I arrived at Plymouth, and had exactly +completed my six years' servitude. + + + + +Chapter XV + + Examine him closely, goodman Dry; spare him not. Ask him + impossible questions. Let us thwart him, let us thwart him. + + BEAUMONT AND FLETCHER. + + +Soon after my arrival at Plymouth, notice was given by a general +order, issued from the flag-ship, that a passing-day for the +examination of midshipmen, as touching their qualifications for the +rank of lieutenant, would be held on board the _Salvador del Mundo_, +in Hamoaze. I lost no time in acquainting my father with this, and +telling him that I felt quite prepared, and meant to offer myself. +Accordingly, on the day appointed, your humble servant, with some +fourteen or fifteen other youthful aspirants, assembled on board the +flag-ship. Each was dressed out in our No. I suits, in most exact and +unquizzable uniform, with a large bundle of log-books under our arms. +We were all huddled together in a small screened canvas cabin, like so +many sheep ready for slaughter. + +About eleven o'clock, the captains who were to be our Minos and our +Rhadamanthus, made their appearance, and we all agreed that we did not +much like the "cut of their jibs." At twelve o'clock the first +name was called. The "desperate youth" tried to pluck up a little +courage--he cleared his throat, pulled up his shirt collar, touched +his neck-handkerchief, and seizing his cocked hat and journals, +boldly followed the messenger into the captain's cabin, where three +grave-looking gentlemen, in undress uniform, awaited him. They were +seated at a round table; a clerk was at the elbow of the president; +Moore's navigation, that wise redoubtable, lay before them; together +with a nautical almanack, a slate and pencil, ink and paper. The +trembling middy advanced to the table, and having most respectfully +deposited his journals and certificates of sobriety and good conduct, +was desired to sit down. The first questions were merely theoretical; +and although in the gun-room, or in any other company, he would have +acquitted himself with ease, he was so abashed and confounded, that he +lost his head entirely, trembled at the first question, stared at the +second, and having no answer to make to the third, was dismissed, with +directions "to go to sea six months longer." + +He returned to us with a most woe-begone countenance. I never saw a +poor creature in greater mental torment. I felt for him the more, as +I knew not how soon his case might be my own. Another was called, and +soon returned with no better success; and the description he gave of +the bullying conduct of the youngest passing captain was such as to +damp the spirits, and enough to stultify minds so inexperienced as +ours, and where so much depended on our success. This hint was, +however, of great use to me. Theory, I found, was the rock on which +they had split; and in this part of my profession, I knew my powers, +and was resolved not to be bowled out by the young captain. But while +I thus resolved, a third candidate was returned to us _re infecta_; +and this was a young man on whose talents I could have relied: I began +to doubt myself. When the fourth came out with a smiling face, and +told us he had passed, I took a little breath; but even this comfort +was snatched from me in a moment, by his saying that one of the +passing captains was a friend of his father. Here then was solved an +enigma; for this fellow, during the short time I was in his company, +gave proof of being no better than a simpleton. + +On my own name being called, I felt a flutter about the heart which I +did not feel in action, or in the hurricane, or when, in a case more +desperate than either, I jumped overboard at Spithead, to swim to my +dear Eugenia. "Powers of Impudence, as well as Algebra," said I, "lend +me your aid, or I am undone." In a moment the cabin door flew open, +the sentinel closed it after me, and I found myself in the presence +of this most awful triumvirate. I felt very like Daniel in the lions' +den. I was desired to take a chair, and a short discussion ensued +between the judges, which I neither heard nor wished to hear: but +while it lasted, I had time to survey my antagonists from head to +foot. I encouraged myself to think that I was equal to one of them; +and if I could only neutralise him, I thought I should very easily +floor the other two. + +One of these officers had a face like a painted pumpkin; and his hand, +as it lay on the table, looked more like the fin of a turtle; the +nails were bitten so close off, that the very remains of them seemed +to have retreated into the flesh, for fear of farther depredation, +which the other hand was at the moment suffering. Thinks I to +myself, "If ever I saw 'lodgings to let, unfurnished,' it is in that +cocoa-nut, or pumpkin, or gourd of yours." + +The next captain to him was a little, thin, dark, dried up, shrivelled +fellow, with keen eyes, and a sharp nose. The midshipmen called him +"Old Chili Vinegar," or, "Old Hot and Sour." He was what we term a +martinet. He would keep a man two months on his black list, giving him +a breech of a gun to polish and keep bright, never allowing him time +to mend his clothes, or keep himself clean, while he was cleaning that +which, for all the purposes of war, had better have been black. He +seldom flogged a man; but he tormented him into sullen discontent, +by what he called "keeping the devil out of his mind." This little +night-mare, who looked like a dried eel-skin, I soon found was the +leader of the band. + +The third captain was a tall, well-looking, pompous man (he was the +junior officer of the three), with a commanding and most unbending +countenance: "He would not ope his mouth in way of smile, though +Nestor swore the jest was laughable." + +I had just time to finish my survey, and form a rough estimate of +the qualities of my examiners, when I was put upon my trial by the +president, who thus addressed me, + +"You are perfect in the theory of navigation, I presume, Sir, or you +would not come here?" + +I replied, that I hoped I should be found so, if they would please to +try me. + +"Ready enough with his answer," said the tall captain; "I daresay this +fellow is jaw-master-general in the cockpit.--Who did you serve your +time with, Sir?" + +I stated the different captains I had served with, particularly Lord +Edward. + +"Oh, ay, that's enough; you _must_ be a smart fellow, if you have +served with Lord Edward." + +I understood the envious and sarcastic manner in which this was +uttered, and prepared accordingly for an arduous campaign, quite sure +that this man, who was no seaman, would have been too happy in turning +back one of Lord Edward's midshipmen. Several problems were given to +me, which I readily solved, and returned to them. They examined my +logs and certificates with much seeming scrutiny, and then ventured a +question in the higher branches of mathematics. This I also solved; +but I found talent was not exactly what they wanted. The little skinny +captain seemed rather disappointed that he could not find fault with +me. A difficult problem in spherical trigonometry lay before them, +carefully drawn out, and the result distinctly marked at the bottom; +but this I was not, of course, permitted to see. I soon answered the +question; they compared my work with that which had been prepared for +them; and as they did not exactly agree, I was told that I was wrong. +I was not disconcerted, and very deliberately looking over my work, I +told them I could not discover any error, and was able to prove it by +inspection, by Canon, by Gunter, or by figure. + +"You think yourself a very clever fellow, I dare say," said the little +fat captain. + +"A second Euclid!" said the tall captain. "Pray, Sir, do you know the +meaning of '_Pons Asinorum_?'" + +"Bridge of Asses, Sir," said I, staring him full in the face, with a +smile under the skin. + +Now it was very clear to me that the little fat captain had never +heard of the Asses Bridge before, and therefore supposed I was +quizzing the tall captain, who, from having been what we used to term +a "harbour-duty man" all his life, had heard of the _Pons Asinorum_, +but did not know which of the problems of Euclid it was, nor how it +was applicable to navigation. The fat captain, therefore burst into a +horse laugh, saying, "I think he hits you hard; you had better let him +alone: he will puzzle you presently." + +Nettled at this observation of his brother officer, the tall captain +was put upon his metal, and insisted that the question last proposed +was not satisfactorily answered, and swore by G---- that he never +would sign my certificate until I did it. + +I persisted; the two works were compared: I was threatened to be +turned back; when, lo, to the dismay of the party, the error was +found in their own work. The fat captain, who was a well-meaning man, +laughed heartily; the other two looked very silly and very angry. + +"Enough of this, Sir," said the martinet: "now stand up, and let us +see what you can do with a ship." A ship was supposed to be on the +stocks; she was launched; I was appointed to her, and, as first +lieutenant, ordered to prepare her for sea. I took her into dock, and +saw her coppered; took her along the sheer-hulk, masted her; laid her +to the ballast-wharf, took in and stowed her iron ballast and her +tanks; moved off to a hulk or receiving ship, rigged her completely, +bent her sails, took in guns, stores, and provisions; reported her +ready for sea, and made the signal for a pilot; took her out of +harbour, and was desired to conduct her into other harbours, pointing +out the shoals and dangers of Portsmouth, Plymouth, Falmouth, the +Downs, Yarmouth Roads, and even to Shetland. + +But the little martinet and the tall captain had not forgiven me for +being right in the problem, and my examination continued. They put my +ship into every possible situation which the numerous casualties of +a sea life present in such endless variety. I set and took in every +sail, from a sky-sail to try-sail. I had my masts shot away, and I +rigged jury-masts: I made sail on them, and was getting fairly into +port, when the little martinet very cruelly threw my ship on her +beam-ends on a dead lee-shore, a dark night, and blowing a hurricane, +and told me to get her out of that scrape if I could. I replied that, +if there was anchorage, I should anchor, and take my chance; but if +there was no anchorage, neither he nor any one else could save the +ship, without a change of wind, or the special interference of +Providence. This did not satisfy old Chili Vinegar. I saw that I was +persecuted, and that the end would be fatal to my hopes: I therefore +became indifferent; was fatigued with the endless questions put to me; +and, very fortunately for me, made a mistake, at least in the opinion +of the tall captain. The question at that time was one which was much +controverted in the service; namely, whether, on being taken flat +aback, you should put your helm a turn or two alee, or keep it +amidship? I preferred the latter mode; but the tall captain insisted +on the former, and gave his reasons. Finding myself on debatable +ground, I gave way, and thanked him for his advice, which I said I +should certainly follow whenever the case occurred to me; not that I +felt convinced then, and have since found that he was wrong; still +my apparent tractability pleased his self-love, and he became my +advocate. "He grinned horribly a ghastly smile," and, turning to the +other captains, asked if they were satisfied. + +This question, like the blow of the auctioneer's hammer, ends all +discussion; for captains, on these occasions, never gainsay each +other; I was told that my passing certificate would be signed. I made +my best bow and my exit, reflecting, as I returned to the "sheep pen," +that I had nearly lost my promotion by wounding their vanity, and had +regained my ground by flattering it. Thus the world goes on; and from +my earliest days, my mind was strengthened and confirmed in every vice +by the pernicious example of my superiors. + +I might have passed much more easily abroad. I remember, one fine day +at sea, in the West Indies, a boat was lowered down, and sent with a +young midshipman (whose time was not fairly served, and whose age and +appearance indicated anything but nautical knowledge) to a ship then +in company; in a quarter of an hour he returned, with his passing +certificate. We were all astonished, and inquired what questions were +put to him; he said, "None at all, except as to the health of my +father and mother; and whether I would have port or white wine and +water. On coming away," the brat added, "one of the captains desired I +would, when I wrote home, give his best respects to Lord and Lady G. +He had ordered a turkey to be picked and put in the boat for me, and +wished me success." + +This boy was soon afterwards made a post-captain; but fortunately for +the service, died on his passage to England. + +There was certainly some difference between this examination and mine; +but when it was over, I rejoiced at the severity of my ordeal. My +pride, my darling pride, was tickled at the triumph of my talents; +and as I wiped away the perspiration from my forehead, I related +my difficulties, my trials, and my success, with a degree of +self-complacency that in any other person I should have called +egregious vanity. One good effect resulted from my long examination, +which continued an hour and a half--this was, that the captains passed +all the other midshipmen with very few questions. They were tired of +their employment; and thus it was only the poor unlucky devils that +took off the fiery edge of their morning zeal, who suffered; and among +"the plucked," it was known there were much cleverer fellows than many +of those who had come off with flying colours. + +There was one circumstance which amused me. When the captains came on +deck, the little Chili Vinegar called me to him, and enquired whether +I was any relation of Mr ----. I replied that he was my uncle. + +"Bless my soul, Sir! why he is my most intimate friend. Why did you +not tell me you were his nephew?" + +I answered with an affected humility, very nearly allied to +impertinence, that I could not see by his face that he knew my uncle; +nor, indeed, had I known it, should I have thought it delicate to have +mentioned it at such a time; as it might not only have implied a want +of confidence in my own abilities, but also a suspicion that he might, +by such a communication, have been induced to deviate from the rigid +path of his duty, and might therefore have received it as a personal +affront. + +"All that is very fine, and very true," said the veteran; "but when +you have an older head upon your shoulders, and have seen a little +more of our service, you will learn to trust at least as much to +friends as to merit; and rely on it, that if you could make yourself +out cousin-german to the old tom-cat at the Admiralty, you would fare +all the better for it. However, it's all over now, and there's an end +of it; but make my compliments to your uncle, and tell him that you +passed your examination in a manner highly creditable to you." + +So saying, he touched his hat to the serjeant's guard, and slipped +down the side into his gig. As he descended, I said to myself, "D----n +your monkey face, you coffee-coloured little rascal--no thanks to you +if I have passed. I suppose your father was breeches-mender to the +first lord's butler, or else you shared your mother's milk with a lord +in waiting, and that's the way you got the command of the ----." + +Elated with the result of the day, I threw myself into the mail that +evening, and reached my father's house in a short time after. My +reception was kind and affectionate; but death had made sad havoc in +my family during my late absence. My elder brother and two sisters had +been successively called to join my poor mother in heaven, and all +that remained now to comfort my father was a younger sister and +myself. I must confess that my father received me with great emotion; +his own heavy afflictions from the loss of his children, and the +dangers I had undergone, as well as the authentic assurances he had +received of my good conduct were more than sufficient to bury all my +errors in oblivion; and he appeared, and I have no doubt really was, +fonder and prouder of me than ever. + +As to what my own feelings were on this occasion, I shall not attempt +to disguise them. Sorry I certainly was for the death of my nearest +relatives; but when the intelligence reached me, I was in the midst of +the most active service. Death in all its forms had become familiar to +me; and so little impression did the event make on my mind, that I +did not interrupt the thread of my history to speak of it when it +occurred. I take shame to myself for not feeling more; but I am quite +sure, from this one instance in my life, that the feelings are blunted +in proportion to the increase of misery around us; that the parent +who, in a moment of peace and domestic tranquillity, would be agonized +at the loss of one child, would view the death of ten with comparative +indifference, when surrounded by war, pestilence, or famine. + +My feelings, never very acute in this respect, were completely blunted +by my course of life. Those fond recollections which, in a calm scene, +would have wrung from me some tears to their memory, were now drowned +or absorbed in the waste, the profligacy, and the dissipation of war; +and shall I add, that I easily reconciled myself to a loss which was +likely so much to increase my worldly gain. For my eldest brother, +I own that, even from childhood, I had felt a jealousy and dislike, +fostered, as I think, in some measure unwisely, and in part +unavoidably, by the conduct of my parents. In all matters of choice +or distinction, Tom was to have the preference, because he was the +oldest: this I thought hard enough; but when Tom had new clothes at +Midsummer and Christmas, and his old ones were converted to my use, +I honestly own I wished the devil had Tom. As a point of economy, +perhaps, this could not be avoided; but it engendered a hatred towards +my brother which often made me, in my own little malignant mind, find +excuses for the conduct of Cain. + +Tom was, to be sure, what is called a good boy; _he_ never soiled his +clothes, as I did. I was always considered as a rantipole, for whom +any thing was good enough. But when I saw my brother tricked out in +new clothes, and his old duds covering me, like a scarecrow, I +appeal to any honourable mind whether it was in human nature to feel +otherwise than I did, without possessing an angelic disposition, to +which I never pretended; and I fairly own that I did shed not one +fiftieth part so many tears over Tom's grave, as I did over his dirty +pantaloons, when forced to put them on. + +As for my sisters, I knew little about them, and cared less: we met +during the holidays, and separated, without regret, after a month's +quarrelling. When I went to sea, I ceased to think about them, +concluding there was no love lost; but when I found that death had +for ever robbed me of two of them, I felt the irretrievable loss. I +reproached myself with my coldness and neglect; and the affection I +had denied to them, I heaped threefold on my remaining sister: even +before I had ever seen her on my return, the tide of fraternal love +flowed towards her with an uncontrollable violence. All that I +ought to have felt towards the others, was concentrated in her, and +displayed itself with a force which surprised even myself. + +Perhaps the reader may be astonished that my first inquiry in London, +when I had seen my father and my family, should not have been after +poor Eugenia, whom I had left, and who also had quitted me, under such +very peculiar and interesting circumstances. I cannot, however, claim +much credit for having performed this duty. I did go, without loss of +time, to her agent; and all that my most urgent entreaty could obtain +from him was that she was well; that I still had credit at his house +for any sum I chose to draw for in moderation; but that her place of +abode must, till farther orders from her, remain a secret. + +As my father did not want interest, and my claims were backed by +good certificates, I received my commission as a lieutenant in his +Majesty's navy about a fortnight after my arrival in London; but not +being appointed to any ship, I resolved to enjoy the "_otium cum +dig_.," and endeavour to make myself some amends for the hard campaign +I had so lately completed in North America. I felt the transport of +being a something: at least, I could live independent of my father, +let the worst come to the worst; and I shall ever think this step gave +me more real pleasure than either of the two subsequent ones which +I have lived to attain. No sooner, therefore, had I taken up my +commission, than my thoughts turned on my Emily; and two days after +the attainment of my rank, I mentioned to my father my intention of +paying a visit to ---- Hall. + +He was at the time in high good humour; we were sitting over our +bottle of claret, after an excellent _tête-à-tête_ dinner, during +which I contributed very much to his amusement by the recital of some +of my late adventures. He shuddered at my danger in the hurricane, and +his good-humoured sides had well nigh cracked with laughter when I +recounted my pranks at Quebec and Prince Edward's Island. When I spoke +of Miss Somerville, my father said he had no doubt she would be happy +to see me--that she was now grown a very beautiful girl, and was the +toast of the county. + +I received this information with an apparent cool indifference which I +was far from feeling inwardly, for my heart beat at the intelligence. +"Perhaps," said I, picking my teeth, and looking at my mouth in a +little ivory _etui_--"perhaps she may be grown a fine girl: she +bade fair to be so when I saw her; but fine girls are very plenty +now-a-days, since the Vaccine has turned out the small-pox. Besides, +the girls have now another chance of a good shape; they are allowed +to take the air, instead of sitting all day, with their feet in the +stocks and their dear sweet noses bent over a French grammar, under +the rod of a French governess." + +Why I took so much pains to conceal from the best of parents the real +state of my heart, I know not, except that, from habit, deceit was to +me more readily at hand than candour; certainly my attachment to this +fair and virtuous creature could not cause me to blush, except at my +own unworthiness of so much excellence. My father looked disappointed; +I know not why; but I afterwards learned that the subject of our union +had, since my brother's death, been discussed and agreed to between +him and Mr Somerville; and that our marriage was only to be deferred +until I should have attained the rank of captain, provided always that +the parties were agreed. + +"I thought," said my father, "that you were rather smitten in that +quarter?" + +"Me smitten, Sir?" said I, with a look of astonishment. "I have, it +is true, a very high respect for Miss Somerville; but as for being in +love with her, I trust no little attentions on my part have been so +construed. I have paid her no more attention than I may have done to +any pretty girl I meet with." (This was, indeed, true, too true.) + +"Well, well," said my father, "it is a mistake on my part." + +And here the conversation on that subject was dropped. + +It appeared that after the little arrangement between Mr Somerville +and my father, and when I had gone to join my ship in America, they +had had some communication together, in which Mr Somerville disclosed, +that having questioned his daughter, she had ingenuously confessed +that I was not indifferent to her. She acknowledged, with crimson +blushes, that I had requested and obtained a lock of her hair. This +Mr Somerville told my father in confidence. He was not, therefore, +at liberty to mention it to me; but it sufficiently accounts for his +astonishment at my seeming indifference; for the two worthy parents +had naturally concluded that it was a match. + +Confounded and bewildered by my asseveration, my father knew not +whose veracity to impeach; but, charitably concluding there was some +mistake, or that I was, as heretofore, a fickle, thoughtless being, +considered himself bound in honour to communicate the substance of our +conversation to Mr Somerville; and the latter no sooner received it, +than he placed the letter in Emily's hands--a very comfortable kind +of _avant-courier_ for a lover, after an absence from his mistress of +full three years. + +I arrived at the hall, bursting with impatience to see the lovely +girl, whose hold on my heart and affection was infinitely stronger +than I had ever supposed. Darting from the chaise, I flew into the +sitting-room, where she usually passed her morning. I was now in my +twenty-second year; my figure was decidedly of a handsome cast; my +face, what I knew most women admired. My personal advantages were +heightened by the utmost attention to dress; the society of the fair +Acadians had very much polished my manners, and I had no more of the +professional roughness of the sea than what, like the crust on the +port-wine, gave an agreeable flavour; my countenance was as open and +as ingenuous as my heart was deceitful and desperately wicked. + +Emily rose with much agitation, and in an instant was clasped in my +arms: not that the movement was voluntary on her part; it was wholly +on mine. She rather recoiled; but for an instant seemed to have +forgotten the fatal communication which her father had made to her not +two hours before. She allowed me--perhaps she could not prevent it--to +press her to my heart. She soon, however, regained her presence of +mind, and, gently disengaging herself, gave vent to her feelings in a +violent flood of tears. + +Not at the time recollecting the conversation with my father, much +less suspecting that Emily had been made acquainted with it, I cannot +but confess that this reception surprised me. My caresses were +repulsed, as coming from one totally disqualified to take such +freedom. She even addressed me as Mr Mildmay, instead of "Frank." + +"What may all this mean, my dearest Emily," said I, "after so long an +absence? What can I have done to make so great an alteration in your +sentiments? Is this the reward of affection and constancy? Have I so +long worn this dear emblem of your affection next my heart, in battle +and in tempest, to be spurned from you like a cur on my return?" + +I felt that I had a clear right to boast of constancy; nor were the +flirtations of Halifax and Quebec at all incompatible with such a +declaration. The fair sex will start at this proposition; but it is +nevertheless true. Emily was to me what the Dutchman's best anchor +was to him--he kept it at home, for fear of losing it. He used other +anchors in different ports, that answered the purpose tolerably well; +but this best bower he always intended to ride by in the Nieu deep, +when he had escaped all the dangers and quicksands of foreign shores: +such was Emily to me. I thought of her when in the very jaws of the +shark; I thought of her when I mounted the rigging in the hurricane; I +thought of her when bored and tormented to madness by the old passing +captains; all, all I might gain in renown was for her. Why, then, +traitor like, did I deny her? For no other reason that I can devise +than that endless love of plot and deceit which had "grown with my +growth." + +Madame de Stael has pronounced love to be an episode in a man's life; +and so far it is true. There are as many episodes in life as there +are in novels and romances; but in neither case do they destroy the +general plot of the history, although they may, for the time, distract +or divert our attention. Here, then, is the distinction between +passion and love. I felt a passion for Eugenia, love for Emily. And +why? Because although it was through my own persuasions and entreaties +that her scruples had been overcome; although it was through her +affection for me which would not allow her to refuse me any demand, +even to the sacrifice of herself, that Eugenia had fallen, still, in +the eyes of society, she had fallen; and I did not offer up a pure and +holy love to that which was not accounted pure. In this I gave way, +ungratefully, to the heartless casuistry of the world. But Emily, +enshrined in modesty, with every talent, equal, if not superior +charms, defended by rank and connection, was a flower perpetually +blooming on the stem of virtue, that it would have amounted to +sacrilege to attempt to have plucked; and the attempt itself would +have savoured of insanity, from the utter hopelessness of success. +Every sentiment connected with her was pure, from mere selfishness. +Not for worlds would I have injured her; because in destroying her +peace of mind, my own would have fled for ever. When I contemplated +our final union, I blushed for my own unworthiness; and looked forward +to the day when, by repentance and amendment, I might be deemed worthy +to lead her to the altar. + +I had not time to pursue these reflections any farther. Emily heard +my appeal, and rising from her seat in the most dignified manner, +addressed me in the commanding language of conscious virtue and +injured innocence. + +"Sir," said she, "I trust I am too honest to deceive you, or any one; +nor have I done that of which I need be ashamed. Whatever reasons I +may have to repent of my misplaced confidence, I will make no secret +of that which now compels me to change my opinion of you; you will +find them amply detailed in this paper," at the same time putting into +my hand a letter from my father to Mr Somerville. + +In a moment the mystery was unravelled, and conviction flashed in +my face like the priming of a musket. Guilty, and convicted on the +clearest evidence, I had nothing left for it, but to throw myself on +her mercy; but while I stood undecided, and unknowing what to do, Mr +Somerville entered, and welcomed me with kind, but cool hospitality. +Seeing Emily in tears, and my father's letter in her hand, he knew +that an _éclaircissement_ had taken place, or was in progress. In this +situation, candour, and an honest confession that I felt a _mauvaise +honte_ in disclosing my passion to my father would undoubtedly have +been my safest course; but my right trusty friend, the devil, stepped +in to my assistance, and suggested deceit, or a continuation of that +chain by which he had long since bound me, and not one link of which +he took care should ever be broken; and fortunately for me, this plan +answered, at the time, better than candour. + +"I must acknowledge, sir," said I, "that appearances are against me. I +can only trust to your patient hearing, while I state the real facts. +Allow me first to say, that my father's observations are hardly +warranted by the conversation which took place; and if you will +please, in the first place, to consider that that very conversation +originated in my expressing a wish and intention of coming down to see +you, and to produce to your daughter the memento so carefully guarded +during my long absence, you must perceive that there is an incongruity +in my conduct, difficult to explain; but still, through all these +mazes and windings, I trust that truth and constancy will be found +at the bottom. You may probably laugh at the idea, but I really +felt jealous of my father's praises so lavishly bestowed on Miss +Somerville; and not supposing he was aware of my attachment, I began +to fear he had pretensions of his own. He is a widower, healthy, and +not old; and it appeared to me that he only wanted my admiration to +justify his choice of a step-mother for myself and sister. Thus, +between love for Miss Somerville, and respect for my father, I +scarcely knew how to act. That I should for one moment have felt +jealous of my father, I now acknowledge with shame: yet labouring +under the erroneous supposition of his attachment to an object which +had been the only one of my adoration, I could not make up my mind to +a disclosure, which I feared would have renewed our differences, and +produced the most insuperable bars to our future reconciliation. +This thought burned in my brain, and urged the speed of the jaded +post-horses. If you will examine the drivers, they will tell you, that +the whole way from town, they have been stimulated by the rapping of a +Spanish dollar on the glass of the chaise. I dreaded my father getting +the start of me; and busy fancy painted him, to my heated imagination, +kneeling at the feet of my beloved Emily. Condemn me not, therefore, +too harshly; only allow me the same lenient judgment which you +exercised when I first had the pleasure of making your acquaintance." + +This last sentence delicately recalled the scene at the inn, and the +circumstances of my first introduction. The defence was not bad; it +wanted but one simple ingredient to have made it excellent--I mean +truth; but the court being strongly biassed in favour of the prisoner, +I was acquitted, and at the same time, "admonished to be more careful +in future." The reconciliation produced a few more tears from my +beloved Emily, who soon after slipped out of the room to recover her +flurry. + +When Mr Somerville and myself were left together, he explained to +me the harmless plot which had been laid for the union between his +daughter and myself. How true it is, that the falling out of lovers is +the renewal of love! The fair, white hand extended to me, was kissed +with the more rapture, as I had feared the losing of it for ever. None +enjoy the pleasures of a secure port, but he who has been tempest +tossed, and in danger of shipwreck. + +The dinner and the evening were among the happiest I can remember. +We sat but a short time over our wine, as I preferred following +my mistress to the little drawing-room, where tea and coffee were +prepared, and where the musical instruments were kept. Emily sang and +played to me, and I sang and accompanied her; and I thought all the +clocks and watches in the house were at least three hours too fast, +when, as it struck twelve, the signal was made to retire. + +I had no sooner laid my head on my pillow than I began to call myself +to a severe account for my duplicity; for, somehow or other, I don't +know how it is, conscience is a very difficult sort of gentleman to +deal with. A tailor's bill you may avoid by crossing the channel; +but the duns of conscience follow you to the antipodes, and will be +satisfied. I ran over the events of the day; I reflected that I +had been on the brink of losing my Emily by an act of needless and +unjustifiable deceit and double-dealing. Sooner or later I was +convinced that this part of my character would be made manifest, +and that shame and punishment would overwhelm me in utter ruin. The +success which had hitherto attended me was no set-off against the risk +I ran of losing for ever this lovely girl, and the respect and esteem +of her father. For her sake, therefore, I made a vow for ever to +abandon this infernal system. I mention this more particularly as it +was the first healthy symptom of amendment I had discovered, and one +to which I long and tenaciously adhered, as far, at least, as my +habits and pursuits in life would allow me. I forgot, at that time, +that to be ingenuous it was necessary to be virtuous. There is no +cause for concealment when we do not act wrong. + +A letter from Mr Somerville to my father explained my conduct; and +my father, in reply, said I certainly must have been mad. To this I +assented, quoting Shakspeare--"the lunatic, the lover, and the poet, +&c.!" So long as I was out of the scrape, I cared little about the +impeachment of my rationality. + +The days at the Hall flew, just like all the days of happy lovers, +confoundedly fast. The more I saw of Emily, the firmer and faster did +she rivet my chains. I was her slave: but what was best, I became a +convert to virtue, because she was virtuous; and to possess her, I +knew I must become as like her as my corrupt mind and unruly habits +would permit. I viewed my past life with shame and contrition. When I +attended this amiable, lovely creature to church on a Sunday, and saw +her in the posture of devotion before her Maker, I thought her an +angel, and I thought it heaven to be near her. All my thoughts and +sentiments seemed changed and refined by her example and her company. +The sparks of religion, so long buried in the ashes of worldly +corruption and infidelity, began to revive. I recalled my beloved +mother and the Bible to my recollection; and could I have been +permitted to have remained longer with my "governess," I have no doubt +that I should have regained both purity of mind and manner. I should +have bidden adieu to vice and folly, because they could not have dwelt +under the same roof with Emily; and I should have loved the Bible and +religion, because they were beloved by her: but my untoward destiny +led me a different way. + + + + +Chapter XVI + + And oft his smooth and bridled tongue + Would give the lie to his flushing cheek: + He was a coward to the strong: + He was a tyrant to the weak. + + SHELLEY. + + +My father, as soon as he had obtained my promotion, asked for my being +employed; and having had a promise from the Admiralty, that promise, +unlike thousands of its predecessors and successors, was too rapidly +fulfilled. I received a letter from my father, and a bouncing one from +the Admiralty, by the same post, announcing officially my appointment +to the D---- brig, of eighteen guns, at Portsmouth, whither I was +directed to repair immediately, and take up my commission. In this +transaction I soon after found there was an underplot, which I was too +green to perceive at the time; but the wise heads of the two papas had +agreed that a separation between the lovers was absolutely necessary, +and that the longer it was delayed, the worse it would be for both of +us: in short, that until I had attained my rank, nothing should be +thought of in the way of matrimony. + +As the reader is, no doubt, by this time pretty well versed in all +the dialogue of parting lovers, I shall not intrude upon his or her +patience with a repetition of that which has been much too often +repeated, and is equally familiar to the prince and the ploughman. I +should as soon think of describing the Devil's Punch Bowl, on the road +to Portsmouth, where I arrived two days after my appointment. + +I put up at Billett's, at the George, as a matter of course, because +it was the resort of all the naval aristocracy, and directly opposite +to the admiral's office. The first person for whom I made my kind +inquiries was my captain elect; but he herded not with his brother +epaulettes. He did not live at the George, nor did he mess at the +Crown; he was not at the Fountain, nor the Parade Coffee-house; and +the Blue Posts ignored him; but he was to be heard of at the Star and +Garter, on the tip of Portsmouth Point. He did not even live there, +but generally resided on board. This does not savour well; I never +like your captains who live on board their ships in harbour; no ship +can be comfortable, for no one can do as he pleases, which is the life +and soul of a man-of-war, when in port. + +To the Star and Garter I went, and asked for Captain G. I hoped I +should not find him here; for this house had been, time out of mind, +the rendezvous of warrant-officers, mates, and midshipmen. Here, +however, he was; I sent up my card, and was admitted to his presence. +He was seated in a small parlour, with a glass of brandy and water, or +at least the remains of it, before him; his feet were on the fender, +and several official documents which he had received that morning +were lying on the table. He rose as I entered, and shewed me a short, +square-built frame, with a strong projection of the sphere, or what +the Spaniards call _bariga_. This rotundity of corporation was, +however, supported by as fine a pair of Atlas legs as ever were worn +by a Bath chairman. His face was rather inclined to be handsome; the +features regular, a pleasant smile upon his lips, and a deep dimple in +his chin. But his most remarkable feature was his eye; it was small, +but piercing, and seemed to possess that long-sought _desideratum_ of +the perpetual motion, since it was utterly impossible to fix it for +one moment on any object: and there was in it a lurking expression, +which, though something of a physiognomist, I could not readily +decipher. + +"Mr Mildmay," said my skipper, "I am extremely happy to see you, and +still more so that you have been appointed to my ship; will you be +seated?" + +As I obeyed, he turned round, and, rubbing his hands, as if he had +just laid down his soap, he continued, "I always make it a rule, +previous to an officer joining my ship, to learn something of his +character from my brother captains; it is a precaution which I take, +as I consider that one scabby sheep, &c. is strictly applicable to our +service. I wish to have good officers and perfect gentlemen about me. +There are, no doubt, many officers who can do their duty well, and +with whom I should have no fault to find; but then there is a way of +doing it--a _modus in rebus_, which a gentleman only can attain to; +coarse manners, execrations, and abusive language render the men +discontented, degrade the service, and are therefore very properly +forbidden in the second article of war. Under such officers, the +men always work unwillingly. I have taken the liberty to make some +inquiries about you; and can only say, that all I have heard is to +your advantage. I have no doubt we shall suit each other; and be +assured it shall be my study to make you as comfortable as possible." + +To this very sensible and polite address, I made a suitable reply. He +then stated that he expected to sail in a few days; that the officer +whom I was to supersede had not exactly suited his ideas, although he +believed him to be a very worthy young man; and that, in consequence, +he had applied and succeeded in obtaining for him another appointment; +that it was necessary he should join his ship immediately; but, of +course, he must first be superseded by me. "Therefore," said he, +"you had better meet me on board the brig to-morrow morning at nine +o'clock, when your commission shall be read; and after that I beg you +will consider yourself your own master for a few days, as I presume +you have some little arrangements to prepare for your cruise. I am +aware," pursued he, smiling most benignantly, "that there are many +little comforts which officers wish to attend to; such as fitting +their cabins and looking to their mess, and a thousand other nameless +things, which tend to pass the time and break up the monotony of a +sea-life. Forty years have I trod the king's planks, man and boy, and +not with any great success, as you may perceive, by the rank I now +hold, and the life I am leading; for here I sit over a glass of humble +grog, instead of joining my brother captains in their claret at the +Crown; but I have two sisters to support, and I feel more satisfaction +in doing my duty as a brother, than indulging my appetite; although +I own I have no dislike to a glass of claret, when it does not come +before me in a questionable shape: I mean when I have not got to pay +for it, which I cannot afford. Now do not let me take up any more of +your time. You have plenty of acquaintances that you wish to see, I +have no doubt; and as for my yarns, they will do to pass away a watch, +when we have nothing more attractive to divert us." So saying, he +held out his hand, and shook mine most cordially. "To-morrow, at nine +o'clock," he repeated; and I left him, much pleased with my interview. + +I went back to my inn, thinking what a very fortunate fellow I was +to have such an honest, straight-forward, bold, British hero of a +captain, on my first appointment. I ordered my dinner at the George, +and then strolled out to make my purchases, and give my orders for a +few articles for sea service. I fell in with several old messmates; +they congratulated me on my promotion, and declared I should give them +a dinner to wet my commission, to which I readily consented. The day +was named, and Mr Billett was ordered to provide accordingly. + +Having dined _solus_, I amused myself in writing a long letter to my +dear Emily; and with the assistance of a bottle of wine, succeeded in +composing a tolerably warm and rapturous sort of a document, which +I sealed, kissed, and sent to the post-office; after which, I built +castles till bed time; but not one castle did I build, in which Emily +was not the sole mistress. I went to bed, and slept soundly; and the +next morning, by seven o'clock, I was arrayed in a spick-span new +uniform, with an immensely large epaulette stuck on my right shoulder. +Having breakfasted, I sallied out, and, in my own conceit, was as +handsome a chap as ever buckled a sword belt. I skimmed with a light +and vigorous foot down High-street. + +"Boat, your honour?" said a dozen voices at once, as I reached New +Sallyport; but I was resolved that Point-street should have a look +at me, as well as High-street; so I kept a profound and mysterious +silence, and let the watermen follow me to Point, just like so many +sucking fish after a shark. I had two or three offers for volunteers +to serve with me as I went along; but they were not of the right sex, +so I did not take them. + +"Boat to Spithead, your honour?" said a tough old waterman. + +"Ay, you'll do," said I; so I jumped into his wherry, and we shoved +off. + +"What ship is your honour going to?" said the man. + +"To the D---- brig." + +"Oh, you are a-going to she, are you? To belong to her, mayhap?" + +"Yes," I replied. + +The waterman gave a sigh, feathered his oar, and never spoke another +word till we came alongside. I did not regret his taciturnity, for I +was always more amused with my own thoughts, than in conversing with +illiterate people. + +The brig was a most beautiful vessel. She mounted eighteen guns, and +sat on the water like a duck. I perceived that the pendant was up for +punishment, and this I thought rather an unusual sight at Spithead: I +took it for granted that some aggravated offence, such as theft, or +mutiny, had been committed. Seeing I was an officer, I was admitted +alongside; so I paid the waterman, and sent him away. As I went up the +side, I saw a poor fellow spread-eagled up to the grating, "according +to the manners and customs of the natives," while the captain, +officers, and ship's company stood round witnessing the athletic +dexterity of a boatswain's mate, who, by the even, deep, and parallel +marks of the cat on the white back and shoulders of the patient, +seemed to be perfectly master of his business. All this did not +surprise me: I was used to it; but after the address of my captain +on the preceding day, I was very much surprised to hear language in +direct violation of the second article of war. + +Cursings and execrations poured out of his mouth with a volubility +equal to any the most accomplished lady on the back of the Point. + +"Boatswain's mate," roared the captain, "do your duty, or by G---- I +will have _you_ up, and give you four dozen yourself. One would think, +d----n your b----d, that you were brushing flies off a sleeping Venus, +instead of punishing a scoundrel, with a hide as thick as a buffalo's, +and be d----d to him--do your duty, Sir, d----n your soul." + +During this elegant address, the unhappy wretch had received four +severe dozen, which the master-at-arms had counted aloud, and reported +to the captain. "Another boatswain's mate," said he. The poor creature +turned his head over his shoulders with an imploring look, but it was +in vain. I watched the countenance of the captain, and the peculiar +expression, which I could not decipher at my first interview, I now +read most plainly: it was malignant cruelty, and delight in torturing +his own species; he seemed to take a diabolical pleasure in the +hateful operation which we were compelled to witness. The second +boatswain's mate commenced, with a fresh cat, and gave a lash across +the back of the prisoner, that made _me_ start. + +"One," said the master-at-arms, beginning to count. + +"One!" roared the captain; "do you call that one? not a quarter of +a one. That fellow is only fit for fly-flapper at a pork shop! I'll +disrate you, by G----d, you d----d Molly Mop; is that the way you +handle a cat; that's only wiping the dirt off his back. Where's the +boatswain?" + +"Here," said a stout, gigantic, left-handed fellow, stepping forward, +with a huge blue uniform coat and a plain anchor button, holding his +hat in his left hand, and stroking his hair down his forehead with his +right. I surveyed this man, as he turned himself about, and concluded, +that the tailor who worked for him had been threatened with a specimen +of his art, if he stinted him in cloth; for the skirts of his coat +were ample, terminating in an inclined plane, the corners in front +being much lower than the middle of the robe behind; the buttons on +the hips were nearly pistol shot asunder. + +"Give this man a dozen, Sir," said Captain G.; "and if you favour him, +I'll put you under arrest, and stop your liquor." + +This last part of the threat had more effect with Mr Pipe than the +first. He began to peel, as the boxers call it; off came his capacious +coat; a red waistcoat--full-sized for a Smithfield ox--was next +deposited; then he untied a black silk handkerchief, and showed a +throat, covered like that of a goat, with long brown hairs, thick as +pack-thread. He next rolled up his shirt-sleeves above his elbow, and +showed an arm and a back very like the Farnese Hercules, which, no +doubt, all my readers have seen at the foot of the staircase at +Somerset-house, when they have been to the exhibition. + +This hopeful commentator on articles of war, seized his cat: the +handle was two feet long, one inch and three quarters thick, and +covered with red baize. The tails of this terrific weapon were three +feet long, nine in number, and each of them about the size of that +line which covers the springs of a travelling carriage. Mr Pipes, +whose scientific display in this part of his art, had no doubt +procured for him the warrant of a boatswain, in virtue of which he now +stood as the vindicator of the laws of his country, handled his cat +like an adept, looked at it from top to bottom, cleared all the tails, +by the insertion of his delicate fingers, and combing them out, +stretched out his left leg--for he was left-legged as well as +left-handed--and measuring his distance with the accurate eye of an +engineer, raised his cat high in air with his left hand, his right +still holding the tips of the tails, as if to restrain their +impatience; when, giving his arm and body a full swing, embracing +three-fourths of the circle, he inflicted a tremendous stroke on the +back of the unfortunate culprit. This specimen seemed to satisfy the +amateur captain, who nodded approbation to the inquiring look of the +amateur boatswain. The poor man lost his respiration from the force of +the blow; and the tails of the cat coming from an opposite direction +to the first four dozen, cut the flesh diamond-wise, bringing the +blood at every blow. + +I will not wound the feelings of my readers with a description of the +poor wretch's situation. Even at this distance of time, I am shocked +at it, and bitterly lament the painful necessity I have often been +under of inflicting similar punishment; but I hope and trust I never +did it without a cause, or in the wanton display of arbitrary power. + +The last dozen being finished, the sum total was reported by the +master-at-arms, "five dozen." + +"Five dozen!" repeated Captain G; "that will do--cast him off. And +now, sir," said he, to the fainting wretch, "I hope this will be a +warning to you, that the next time you wish to empty your beastly +mouth, you will not spit on my quarter-deck." + +"Heavens!" thought I, "is all this for spitting on the quarter-deck? +and this, from the moralist of yesterday, who allowed neither oaths +nor execrations, and has uttered more blasphemy in the last ten +minutes, than I have heard for the last ten weeks?" + +I had not yet caught the captain's eye--he was too intent on his +amusement. As soon as the prisoner was cast loose, he commanded to +pipe down, or in other words, to dismiss the people to their usual +occupations, when I went up to him, and touched my hat. + +"Oh! you are come, are you? Pipe, belay there--send every body aft on +the quarter-deck." + +My commission was then read: all hats off in respect to the sovereign, +from whom the authority was derived. After this, I, being duly +inaugurated, became the second lieutenant of the sloop; and the +captain, without condescending to give me another word or look, +ordered his gig to be manned, and was going on shore. I was not +presented by him to any of the officers, which, in common courtesy, he +ought to have done. This omission, however, was supplied by the first +lieutenant, who invited me down into the gun-room, to introduce me +to my new messmates. We left the tiger pacing up and down on his +quarter-deck. + +The first lieutenant was of the medium stature, a suitable height for +a sloop of war, a spare figure of about forty years of age; he had but +one eye, and that eye was as odd a one as the captain's. There was in +it, however, unlike the captain's, an infinite deal of humour, and +when he cocked it, as he constantly did, it almost spoke. I never saw +three such eyes in two such heads. There was a lurking smile in the +lieutenant's face, when I told him that the captain had desired me to +come on board and read my commission, after which I might have two or +three days to myself to prepare for sea. + +"Well," said he, "you had better go and ask him now; but you will find +him a rum one." + +Accordingly, up I went to him. "Have you any objection to my going on +shore, Sir?" + +"Shore, Sir!" bellowed he "and who the devil is to carry on the duty, +if you go on shore? Shore, eh! I wish there was no shore, and then +d----n the dog that couldn't swim! No, Sir; you have had shore +enough. The service is going to h----l, Sir! A parcel of brats, with +lieutenants' commissions before they should have been clear of the +nursery! No, Sir: stay on board, or, d----n me, I'll break you, like +an egg-shell, before you have taken the shine out of that fine new +epaulette! No, no, by G----; no more cats here than catch mice. You +stay on board, and do your duty: every man does his duty here; and let +me see the ---- that don't do it!" + +I was in some measure prepared for this sublime harangue; but still +there was sufficient room in my mind to admit of great astonishment at +this sudden change of wind. I replied that he had promised me leave +yesterday, and that, upon the strength of that promise, I had left all +my things on shore, and that I was not in any way prepared to go to +sea. + +"I promised you leave, did I? Perhaps I did; but that was only to get +you on board. I am up to your tricks, you d----d young chaps: when you +get on shore, there is no getting you off again. No, no; no-catchee +no-habee! You would not have made your appearance these three days, if +I hadn't sugared the trap! Now I have got you, I'll keep you, d----n my +eyes!" + +I repeated my request to go on shore; but, without condescending to +offer any farther reasons, he answered-- + +"I'd see you d----d first, Sir! And observe, I never admit of +expostulation. Nothing affords me more pleasure than to oblige my +officers in every thing reasonable; but I never permit reply." + +Thought I to myself, "You certainly have escaped from hell, and I do +not see how the infernal regions can do without you. You would have +been one of the most ingenious tormentors of the damned. Domitian +would have made you admiral, and your boatswain captain of the fleet!" + +Having made this reflection, as I took a turn or two on deck, thinking +what was best to be done, and knowing that "the king could do no +wrong," the officer whom I had just superseded came up the hatchway, +and, touching his hat very respectfully to the captain, asked whether +he might go on shore. + +"You may go to hell, and be d----d, Sir!" said the captain (who hated +bad language); "you are not fit to carry guts to a bear!--you are not +worth your salt; and the sooner you are off, the cleaner the ship will +be! Don't stand staring at me, like a bull over a gate! Down, and pack +up your traps, or I'll freshen your way!" raising his foot at the same +time, as if he was going to kick him. + +The young officer, who was a mild, gentlemanly, and courageous +youth, did as he was bidden. I was perfectly astonished: I had been +accustomed to sail with gentlemen. I had heard of martinets, and +disciplinarians, and foul-mouthed captains; but this outdid all I ever +could have conceived, and much more than I thought ever could have +been submitted to by any correct officer. Roused to indignation, and +determined not to be treated in this manner, I again walked up to him, +and requested leave to go on shore. + +"You have had your answer, Sir." + +"Yes, I have, Sir," said I, "and in language that I never before heard +on his Majesty's quarter-deck. I joined this ship as an officer and a +gentleman, and as such I will be treated." + +"Mutiny, by G----!" roared the captain. "Cock-a-hoop with your new +commission, before the ink is dry!" + +"As you please, Sir," I replied; "but I shall write a letter to the +port-admiral, stating the circumstances and requesting leave of +absence; and that letter I shall trouble you to forward." + +"I'll be d----d if I do!" said he. + +"Then, Sir," said I, "as you have refused to forward it, and in the +presence of all the officers and ship's company, I shall forward it +without troubling you." + +This last shot of mine seemed to produce the same effect upon him that +the last round does upon a beaten boxer; he did not come to time, +but, muttering something, dived down the companion, and went into his +cabin. + +The first lieutenant now came up, and congratulated me on my victory. +"You have puzzled and muzzled the bear completely," said he; "I have +long wanted a coadjutor like yourself. Wilson, who is going to leave +us, is the best creature that ever lived: but though brave as a lion +before an enemy, he is cowed by this incarnate devil." + +Our conversation was interrupted by a message from the captain, who +desired to speak with me in his cabin. I went down; he received me +with the benignant smile of our first acquaintance. + +"Mr Mildmay," said he, "I always assume a little tartness with my +officers when they first join" ("and when they quit you too," thought +I), "not only to prove to them that I am, and will be the captain of +my own ship, but also as an example to the men, who, when they see +what the officers are forced to put up with, feel themselves more +contented with their lot, and obey more readily; but, as I told you +before, the comfort of my officers is my constant study--you are +welcome to go ashore, and have twenty-four hours' leave to collect +your necessaries." + +To this harangue I made no reply; but, touching my hat, quitted the +cabin. I felt so much contempt for the man that I was afraid to speak, +lest I should commit myself. + +The captain shortly after quitted the ship, telling the first +lieutenant that I had permission to go on shore. I was now left at +liberty to make acquaintance with my companions in misery--and nothing +conduces to intimacy so much as community of suffering. My resistance +to the brutality of our common taskmaster had pleased them; they told +me what a tyrant and what a disgrace to the service he was, and how +shameful it was that he should be entrusted with the command of so +fine a vessel, or of any vessel at all, except it were a convict ship. +The stories they told me of him were almost incredible, and nothing +but the too well founded idea, that an officer trying his captain by +a court-martial, had a black mark against him for ever after, and was +never known to rise, could have saved this man from the punishment he +so richly deserved: no officer, they said, had been more than three +weeks in the ship, and they were all making interest to leave her. + +In my report of what occurred in this vessel during the time I +belonged to her, I must, in justice to the captains and commanders of +his Majesty's navy observe, that the case was unique of its kind--such +a character as Captain G---- was rarely met with in the navy then, +and, for reasons which I shall give, will be still more rare in +future. The first lieutenant told me that I had acted very judiciously +in resisting at first his undue exertion of authority; that he was +at once a tyrant, a bully, and a coward, and would be careful how he +attacked me again. "But be on your guard," said he, "he will never +forgive you; and, when he is most agreeable, there is the most +mischief to be dreaded. He will lull you into security, and, whenever +he can catch you tripping, he will try you by a court-martial. You had +better go on shore, and settle all your business, and, if possible, be +on board before your leave is out. It was only your threat of writing +to the port-admiral that procured you leave of absence. You have +nothing to thank him for: he would have kept you on board if he dared. +I have never quitted the ship since I joined her; and never has a +day passed without a scene similar to what you have this morning +witnessed. And yet," continued he, "if it were not for his cruelty to +the men, he is the most amusing liar I ever heard. I am often more +inclined to laugh than to be angry at him; he has a vein of wit and +rich humour that runs through his composition, and never quits him. +There is drollery even in his malice, and, if we cannot get clear of +him, we must make the best of him." + +I went on shore, collected all my clothes and the other articles of +which I stood in need, and was on board my ship again the next morning +before eight o'clock. + + + + +Chapter XVII + + He will lie, Sir, with such volubility, that you would think + truth were a fool: drunkenness is his best virtue; for he will be + swine-drunk; and in his sleep he does little harm.--SHAKSPEARE. + + +When Captain G---- made his appearance, he seemed to be in the most +amiable humour possible. As soon as he saw me, he said, "Ah, this is +what I like; never break your leave even for five minutes. Now that I +see I can trust you, you may go on shore again as soon as you please." + +This speech might have done very well to any person before the mast; +but as applied to an officer, I thought it rude and ungentlemanly. + +The caterer had prepared lunch in the gun-room: it consisted of +beef-steaks and broiled bullocks' kidneys, with fried onions; and +their savoury smell rose in grateful steams up the skylight, and +assailed the nostrils of the skipper. His facetious small-talk knew +no bounds; he leaned over the frame, and, looking down, said--"I say, +something devilish good going on there below!" + +The hint was taken, and the first lieutenant invited him down. + +"I don't care if I do; I am rather peckish." + +So saying, he was down the hatchway in the twinkling of one of his own +funny eyes, as he feared the choice bits would be gone before he could +get into action. We all followed him; and as he seated himself, he +said-- + +"I trust, gentlemen, this is not the last time I shall sit in the +gun-room, and that you will all consider my cabin as your own. I +love to make my officers comfortable: nothing more delightful than a +harmonious ship, where every man and boy is ready to go to h----l for +his officers. That's what I call good fellowship--give and take--make +proper allowances for one another's failings, and we shall be sorry +when the time comes for us to part. I am afraid, however, that I shall +not be long with you; for, though I doat upon the brig, the Duke +of N---- and Lord George ----, have given the first Lord a d----d +_whigging_ for not promoting me sooner; and, between ourselves, I +don't wish to go farther. My post commission goes out with me to +Barbadoes." + +The first lieutenant cocked his eye; and quick as were the motions +of that eye, the captain, with a twist of one of his own, caught a +glimpse of it, before it could be returned to its bearing on the +central object, the beef-steaks, kidneys, and onions. But it passed +off without remark. + +"A very capital steak this! I'll trouble you for some fat and a little +gravy. We'll have some jollification when we get to sea; but we must +get into blue water first: then we shall have less to do. Talking of +broiling steaks, when I was in Egypt, we used to broil our beef-steaks +on the rocks--no occasion for fire--thermometer at 200--hot as h----l! +I have seen four thousand men at a time cooking for the whole army +as much as twenty or thirty thousand pounds of steaks at a time, +all hissing and frying at a time--just about noon, of course, you +know--not a spark of fire! Some of the soldiers, who had been brought +up as glass-blowers, at Leith, swore they never saw such heat. I used +to go to leeward of them for a whiff, and think of old England! Ah, +that's the country, after all, where a man may think and say what he +pleases! But that sort of work did not last long, as you may suppose; +their eyes were all fried out, d----n me, in three or four weeks! I had +been ill in my bed, for I was attached to the 72nd regiment, seventeen +hundred strong. I had a party of seamen with me; but the ophthalmia +made such ravages, that the whole regiment, colonel and all, went +stone blind--all, except one corporal! You may stare, gentlemen, but +it's very true. Well, this corporal had a precious time of it: he was +obliged to lead out the whole regiment to water--he led the way, and +two or three took hold of the skirts of his jacket, on each side; the +skirts of these were seized again by as many more; and double the +number to the last, and so all held on by one another, till they had +all had a drink at the well; and, as the devil would have it, there +was but one well among us all--so this corporal used to water the +regiment just as a groom waters his horses; and all spreading out, you +know, just like the tail of a peacock." + +"Of which the corporal was the rump," interrupted the doctor. + +The captain looked grave. + +"You found it warm in that country?" inquired the surgeon. + +"Warm!" exclaimed the captain; "I'll tell you what, doctor, when +you go where you have sent many a patient, and where, for that very +reason, you certainly will go, I only hope, for your sake, and for +that of your profession in general, that you will not find it quite so +hot as we found it in Egypt. What do you think of nineteen of my men +being killed by the concentrated rays of light falling on the barrels +of the sentinels' bright muskets, and setting fire to the powder? I +commanded a mortar battery at Acre, and I did the French infernal +mischief with the shells. I used to pitch in among them when they had +sat down to dinner: but how do you think the scoundrels weathered on +me at last? D----n me, they trained a parcel of poodle dogs to watch +the shells when they fell, and then to run and pull the fuses out with +their teeth. Did you ever hear of such d----d villains? By this means, +they saved hundreds of men, and only lost half a dozen dogs--fact, +by G----; only ask Sir Sydney Smith; he'll tell you the same, and a +d----d sight more." + +The volubility of his tongue was only equalled by the rapidity of his +invention and the powers of mastication; for, during the whole of this +entertaining monodrame, his teeth were in constant motion, like the +traversing beam of a steam boat; and as he was our captain as well as +our guest, he certainly took the lion's share of the repast. + +"But, I say, Soundings," said he, addressing himself familiarly to the +master, who had not been long in the vessel, "let us see what sort +of stuff you have stowed the fore-hold with. You know I am a water +drinker; give me only the pure limpid stream, and a child may lead me. +I seldom touch liquor when the water is good." So saying, he poured +out a tumbler, and held it to his nose. "Stinks like h----! I say, +master, are you sure the bungs are in your casks? The cats have been +contributing to the fluid. We must qualify this;" and having poured +one-half of the water, which by the by was very good, he supplied the +vacancy with rum. Then tasting it, he said, "Come, Miss Puss; this +will rouse you out, at any rate." + +A moment's pause, while he held the bumper before his eye, and then, +down it went, producing no other emotion than a deep sigh. "By the by, +that's well thought of--we'll have no cats in the ship (except those +which the depravity of human nature unhappily compels the boatswain to +use). Mr Skysail, you'll look to that. Throw them all overboard." + +Taking his hat, he rose from the table, and mounting the ladder, "On +second thought," said he, addressing Skysail again, "I won't throw the +cats overboard; the sailors have a foolish superstition about that +animal--its d----d unlucky. No; put them alive in a bread-bag, and +send them on shore in the bum-boat." + +Recollecting that my dinner party at the George was to take place this +day, and remembering the captain's promise that I should go on shore +whenever I pleased, I thought it only necessary to say I was going, +merely passing the usual compliment to my superior. I therefore went +to him, with a modest assurance, and told him of my engagement and my +intention. + +"Upon my honour, Sir," cried he, putting his arms akimbo, and staring +me full in the face; "you have a tolerable sea-stock of modest +assurance; no sooner come on board than you ask leave to go on shore +again, and at the same time you have the impudence to tell me, knowing +how much I abhor the vice, that you mean to wet your commission, and +of course to get beastly drunk, and to make others as bad as yourself. +No, Sir; I'd have you to know, that as captain of this ship, and as +long as I have the honour to command her, I am _magister morum_." + +"That is precisely what I was coming to, Sir," said I, "when you +interrupted me. Knowing how difficult it is to keep young men in +order, without the presence of some one whom they respect, and can +look up to as an example, I was going to request the honour of your +company as my guest. Nothing, in my opinion, could so effectually +repress any tendency to improper indulgence." + +"There you speak like a child of my own bringing up," replied Captain +G----: "I did not give you credit for so much good sense. I am far +from throwing a wet blanket over any innocent mirth. Man is man after +all--give him but the bare necessaries of life, and he is no more than +a dog. A little mirth on such an occasion, is not only justifiable, +but praiseworthy. The health of a good king, like ours, God bless him, +should always be drank in good wine; and as you say the party is to be +select, and the occasion the wetting of your commission, I shall have +no objection to come and give away the bride; but, remember, no hard +drinking--no indecorum--and I'll do my best, not only to keep the +young bloods in order, but to add my humble powers to the hilarity of +the evening." + +I thanked him for his kind condescension. He then gave a few +directions to Skysail, the first lieutenant, and, ordering his gig to +be manned, offered me a passage on shore. + +This was, indeed, a mark of favour never before conferred on any +officer in the ship, and all hands spontaneously turned out to see +the sight. The first lieutenant cocked his eye, which was more than +saying, "This is too good to last long." However, into the boat we +went, and pulled away for old Sally-port. The harbour-tide rolling +out, we passed close to the buoy of the _Boyne_. + +"Ah! well I remember that old ship; I was midshipman of her when she +blew up. I was signal midshipman. I was in the act of making the +signal of distress, when up I went. Damnation! I thought I never +should have come down any more." + +"Indeed, Sir," said I, "I thought there had been no one on board at +the time." + +"No one on board!" repeated the captain, with scorn on his upper lip, +"who did you get that from?" + +"I heard it from a captain I served with in America." + +"Then you may tell your captain, with my compliments, that he knew +nothing at all about it. No one on board! Why, d---- me, Sir, the poop +was crowded like a sheepfold, and all bellowing to me for help. I told +them all to go to h----, and just at that moment away we all went, +sure enough. I was picked up senseless. I was told somewhere in +Stokes-bay, and carried to Haslar hospital, where I was given over for +three months--never spoke. At last I got well; and the first thing I +did, was to take a boat and go and dive down the fore-hold of my old +ship, and swam aft to the bread-room." + +"And what did you see, Sir?" said I. + +"Oh, nothing, except lots of human skeletons, and whitings in +abundance, swimming between their ribs. I brought up my old quadrant +out of the starboard wing, where I was adjusting it when the alarm was +given. I found it lying on the table just where I left it. I never +shall forget what a d----d rap we hit the old Queen Charlotte, with +our larboard broadside; every gun went slap into her, double-shotted. +D----n my eyes, I suppose we diddled at least a hundred men." + +"Why, Sir," said I, "I always understood she only lost two men on that +occasion." + +"Who told you that?" said Captain G----, "your old captain?" + +"Yes, Sir," said I, "he was a midshipman in her." + +"He be d----," said my skipper; "to my certain knowledge, three +launch loads of dead bodies were taken out of her, and carried to the +hospital for interment." + +As the boat touched the landing-place, this accomplished liar had time +to take breath, and, in fact, I was afraid he would have exhausted his +stock of lies before dinner, and kept nothing for the dessert. When we +landed, he went to his old quarters, at the Star and Garter, and I to +the George. I reminded him, at parting, that six o'clock was my hour. + +"Never fear me," said he. + +I collected my company previous to his arrival, and told my friends +that it was my determination to make him drunk, and that they must +assist me, which they promised to do. Having once placed him in that +predicament, I was quite sure I should stop his future discourses in +favour of temperance. My companions, perfectly aware of the sort of +man they had to deal with, treated him on his entrance with the most +flattering marks of respect. I introduced them all to him in the +most formal manner, taking them to him, one by one, just as we +are presented at court--to compare great things with small. His +good-humour was at its highest spring-tide; the honour of drinking +wine with him was separately and respectfully asked, and most +condescendingly granted to every person at the table. + +"Capital salmon this," said the captain; "where does Billett get it +from? By the by, talking of that, did you ever hear of the pickled +salmon in Scotland?" + +We all replied in the affirmative. + +"Oh, you don't take. D----it, I don't mean dead pickled salmon; I mean +live pickled salmon, swimming about in tanks, as merry as grigs, and +as hungry as rats." + +We all expressed our astonishment at this, and declared we never heard +of it before. + +"I thought not," said he, "for it has only lately been introduced into +this country, by a particular friend of mine, Dr Mac----. I cannot +just now remember his d----d jaw-breaking Scotch name; he was a great +chemist and geologist, and all that sort of thing--a clever fellow +I can tell you, though you may laugh. Well--this fellow, Sir, took +nature by the heels and capsized her, as we say. I have a strong idea +that he had sold himself to the devil. Well--what does he do, but he +catches salmon and puts them into tanks, and every day added more and +more salt, till the water was as thick as gruel, and the fish could +hardly wag their tails in it. Then he threw in whole pepper corns, +half-a-dozen pounds at a time, till there was enough. Then he began to +dilute with vinegar, until his pickle was complete. The fish did not +half like it at first; but habit is every thing, and when he shewed me +his tank, they were swimming about as merry as a shoal of dace; he +fed them with fennel chopped small, and black-pepper corns. 'Come, +doctor,' says I, 'I trust no man upon tick; if I don't taste, I won't +believe my own eyes, though I _can_ believe my _tongue_.'" (We looked +at each other.) "'That you shall do in a minute,' says he; so he +whipped one of them out with a landing net; and when I stuck my knife +into him, the pickle ran out of his body, like wine out of a claret +bottle, and I ate at least two pounds of the rascal, while he flapped +his tail in my face. I never tasted such salmon as that. Worth your +while to go to Scotland, if it's only for the sake of eating live +pickled salmon. I'll give you a letter, any of you, to my friend. +He'll be d----d glad to see you; and then you may convince yourselves. +Take my word for it, if once you eat salmon that way, you will never +eat it any other." + +We all said we thought that very likely. + +The champagne corks flew as fast and as loud as his shells at Acre; +but we were particularly reserved, depending entirely on his tongue +for our amusement; and, finding the breeze of conversation beginning +to freshen, I artfully turned the subject to Egypt, by asking one of +my friends to demolish a pyramid of jelly, which stood before him, and +to send some of it to the captain. + +This was enough: he began with Egypt, and went on increasing in the +number and magnitude of his lies, in proportion as we applauded them. +A short-hand writer ought to have been there, for no human memory +could do justice to this modern Munchausen. "Talking of the water of +the Nile," said he, "I remember, when I was first lieutenant of the +_Bellerophon_ I went into Minorca with only six tons of water, and in +four hours we had three hundred and fifty tons on board, all stowed +away. I made all hands work. The admiral himself was up to the neck +in water, with the rest of them. 'D----n it, admiral,' says I, 'no +skulking.' Well--we sailed the next day; and such a gale of wind I +never saw in all my life--away went all our masts, and we had nearly +been swamped with the weather-roll. One of the boats was blown off the +booms, and went clean out of sight before it touched the water. You +may laugh at that, but that was nothing to the _Swallow_ sloop of +war. She was in company with us; she wanted to scud for it, but, by +Jupiter, she was blown two miles up the country--guns, men, and all; +and the next morning they found her flying jib-boom had gone through +the church-window, and slap into the cheek of the picture of the +Virgin Mary. The natives all swore it was done on purpose by d----d +heretics. The captain was forced to arm his men, and march them all +down to the beach, giving the ship up to the people, who were so +exasperated that they set her on fire, and never thought of the powder +which was on board. All the priests were in their robes, singing some +stuff or another, to purify the church; but that was so much time +thrown away, for in one moment away went church, priests, pictures, +and people, all to the devil together." + +Here he indulged himself in some vile language and scurrilous abuse of +religion and its ministers. All priests were hypocritical scoundrels. +If he was to be of any religion at all, he said, he should prefer +being a Roman Catholic, "because, then, you know," added he, "a +man may sin as much as he likes, and rub off as he goes, for a few +shillings. I got my commission by religion, d----n me. I found my old +admiral was a psalm-singer; so says I, 'my old boy, I'll give you +enough of that,' so I made the boatswain stuff me a hassock, and this +I carried with me every where, that I might save my trowsers, and not +hurt my knees; so then I turned to and prayed all day long, and kept +the people awake, singing psalms all night. I knelt down and prayed on +the quarter-deck, main-deck, and lower deck. I preached to the men in +the tiers, when they coiled the cables, and groaned loud and deep when +I heard an oath. The thing took--the admiral said I was the right +sort, and he made a commander out of the greatest atheist in the ship. +No sooner did I get hold of the sheepskin, than to the devil I pitched +hassock and bible." + +How long he might have gone on with this farrago, it is difficult to +say; but we were getting tired of him, so we passed the bottle till he +left off narrative, and took to friendship. + +"Now I say (hiccup), you Frank, you are a devilish good fellow; but +that one-eyed son of a gun, I'll try him by a court-martial, the first +time I catch him drunk; I'll hang him at the yard-arm, and you shall +be my first lieutenant and _custos-rot-torum_, d----n me. Only you come +and tell me the first time he is disguised in liquor, and I'll settle +him, d----n his cock eye--a saucy, Polyphemus-looking _son of a--_ +(hiccup) a Whitechapel bird-catcher." + +Here his recollection failed him; he began to talk to himself, and to +confound me with the first lieutenant. + +"I'll teach him to write to port-admirals for leave--son of a sea +cook." + +He was now drawing to the finale, and began to sing, + + "The cook of the huffy got drank, + Fell down the fore-scuttle, and + Broke his gin bottle." + +Here his head fell back, he tumbled off his chair, and lay motionless +on the carpet. + +Having previously determined not to let him be exposed in the streets +in that state, I had provided a bed for him at the inn; and, ringing +the bell, I ordered the waiter to carry him to it. Having seen him +safely deposited, untied his neckcloth, took off his boots, and raised +his head a little, we left him, and returned to the table, where we +finished our evening in great comfort, but without any other instance +of intoxication. + +The next morning, I waited on him. He seemed much annoyed at seeing +me, supposing I meant, by my presence, to rebuke him for his +intemperance; but this was not my intention. I asked him how he felt; +and I regretted that the hilarity of the evening had been interrupted +in so unfortunate a manner. + +"How do you mean, sir? Do you mean to insinuate that I was not sober?" + +"By no means, Sir," said I; "but are you aware, that in the midst of +your delightful and entertaining conversation, you tumbled off your +chair in an epileptic fit?--are you subject to these?" + +"Oh, yes, my dear fellow, indeed I am; but it is so long since I last +had one, that I was in hopes they had left me. I have invalided for +them four times, and just at the very periods when, if I could have +remained out, my promotion was certain." + +He then told me I might remain on shore that day, if I pleased. I gave +him credit for his happy instinct in taking the hint of the fit; and +as soon as I left him, he arose, went on board, and flogged two men +for being drunk the night before. + +I did not fail to report all that had passed to my messmates, and we +sailed a few days afterwards for Barbadoes. + +On the first Sunday of our being at sea, the captain dined in the +gun-room with the officers. He soon launched out into his usual strain +of lying and boasting, which always irritated our doctor, who was a +sensible young Welshman. On these occasions, he never failed to raise +a laugh at the captain's expense, by throwing in one or two words at +the end of each anecdote; and this he did in so grave and modest a +manner, that without a previous knowledge of him, anyone might have +supposed he was serious. The captain renewed his story of the corps of +poodles to extract the fuses from the shells. "I hoped," he said, "to +see the institution of such a corps among ourselves; and if I were to +be the colonel of it, I should soon have a star on my breast." + +"That would be the Dog Star," said the doctor, with extreme gaiety. + +"Thank you, Doctor," said the captain; "not bad; I owe you one." + +We laughed; the doctor kept his countenance; and the captain looked +very grave; but he continued his lies, and dragged in as usual the +name of Sir Sydney Smith to support his assertions. "If you doubt me, +only ask Sir Sydney Smith; he'll talk to you about Acre for thirty-six +hours on a stretch, without taking breath; his cockswain at last got +so tired of it, that he nick-named him 'Long Acre.'" + +The poor doctor did not come off scot free; the next day, he +discovered that the deck leaked over his cabin, and the water ran into +his bed. He began, with a hammer and some nails, to fasten up a piece +of painted canvas, by way of shelter. The captain heard the noise of +the hammer, and finding it was the doctor, desired him to desist. The +doctor replied, that he was only endeavouring to stop some leaks over +his bed: the captain said they should not be stopped; for that a bed +of leeks was a very good bed for a Welshman. + +"There, Doctor; now we are quits: that's for your Dog Star. I suppose +you think nobody can make a pun or a pill, in the ship, but yourself?" + +"If my pills were no better than your puns," muttered the doctor, "we +should all be in a bad way." + +The captain then directed the carpenter not to allow any nails to the +doctor, or the use of any of his tools; he even told the poor surgeon +that he did not know how to make a pill, and that "he was as useless +as the Navy Board." He accused him of ignorance in other parts of his +profession; and, ordering all the sick men on deck, rope-ended them to +increase their circulation, and put a little life into them. + +Many a poor sick creature have I seen receive a most unmerciful +beating. My wonder was that the men did not throw him overboard; and I +do really believe that if it had not been for respect and love to the +officers, they would have done so. No sooner had we got into blue +water, as he called it--that is, out of soundings--than he began his +pranks, which never ceased till we reached Carlisle Bay. Officers and +men were all treated alike, and there was no redress, for no one +among us dared to bring him to a court-martial. His constant maxim +was--"Keep sailors at work, and you keep the devil out of their +minds--all hands all day-watch, and watch all night." + +"No man," said Jacky (the name we gave him) "eats the bread of +idleness on board of my ship: work keeps the scurvy out of their +bones, the lazy rascals." + +The officers and men, for the first three weeks, never had a watch +below during the day. They were harassed and worn to death, and the +most mutinous and discontented spirit prevailed throughout the ship. +One of the best seamen said, in the captain's hearing, that, "since +the ship had been at sea, he had only had three watches below." + +"And if I had known it," said the captain, "you should not have had +that;" and turning the hands up, he gave him four dozen. + +Whenever he flogged the men, which he was constantly doing, he never +failed to upbraid them with ingratitude, and the indulgences which +they received from him. + +"By G----d, there is no man-of-war in the service that has so much +indulgence. All you have to do, is to keep the ship clean, square the +yards; hoist in your provisions, eat them; hoist your grog in, drink +it, and strike the empty casks over the side; but Heaven itself would +not please such a set of d----d fat, lazy, discontented rascals." + +His language to the officers was beyond any thing I ever could have +supposed would have proceeded from the mouth of a human being. The +master, one day, incurred his displeasure, and he very flippantly told +the poor man to go to h----. + +"I hope, Sir," said the master, "I have as good a chance of going to +Heaven as yourself." + +"You go to Heaven!" said the captain, "you go to Heaven! Let me catch +you there, and I will come and kick you out." + +This was, indeed, shewing how far he would have carried his tyranny if +he could. But our feelings are relieved from any violent shock at +this apparent blasphemy, when we recollect that the poor man was an +atheist; and that his idea of Heaven was that of a little parlour at +the Star and Garter, with a good fire, plenty of grog, and pipes of +tobacco. + +He kept no table, nor did he ever drink any wine, except when he +dined with us; but got drunk every night, more or less, on the ship's +spirits, in his own cabin. He was always most violent in the evening. +Our only revenge was laughing at his monstrous lies on Sunday, when he +dined with us. One night, his servant came and told the midshipman of +the watch, that the captain was lying dead drunk on the deck, in his +cabin. This was communicated to me, and I determined to make the best +use of it. I ran down to the cabin taking with me the midshipman of +the watch, the quarter-master, and two other steady men; and having +laid the water-drinker in his bed, I noted down the date, with all the +particulars, together with the names of the witnesses, to be used as +soon as we fell in with the admiral. + +The next day, I think he had some suspicion of what I had done, and it +had nearly been fatal to me. It was blowing a fresh trade wind, and +the vessel rolling very deep, when he ordered the booms to be cast +loose and re-stowed. This was nothing short of murder and madness: but +in spite of every remonstrance, he persisted, and the consequences +were terrible. The lashings were no sooner cast off, than a spare +top-mast fell and killed one of the men. This was enough to have +completed our mischief for the day; but the devil had not done with us +yet. The booms were secured, and the men were ordered to rattle the +rigging down, which, as the vessel continued to roll heavily, was +still more dangerous, and, if possible, more useless than the former +operation. He was warned of it, but in vain; and the men had not been +aloft more than ten minutes, when one of them fell overboard. Why I +should again have put my life in jeopardy, particularly after the +warning of the last voyage, I know not. I was perhaps vain of what I +could do in the water. I knew my powers; and with the hope of saving +this unfortunate victim to the folly and cruelty of the captain, I +plunged after him into the sea, feeling at the same time, that I was +almost committing an act of suicide. I caught hold of him, and for a +time supported him; and, had the commonest diligence and seamanship +been shewn, I should have saved him. But the captain, it appeared, +when he found I was overboard, was resolved to get rid of me, in order +to save himself: he made use of every difficulty to prevent the boat +coming to me. The poor man was exhausted: I kept myself disengaged +from him, when swimming round him; supported him occasionally whenever +he was sinking; but, finding at last that he was irrecoverably +gone--for though I had a firm hold of him, he was going lower and +lower--and, looking up, perceiving I was so deep that the water was +dark over my head, I clapped my knees on his shoulders, and, giving +myself a little impetus from the resistance, rose to the surface. So +much was I exhausted, that I could not have floated half a minute +more, when the boat came and picked me up. + +The delay in heaving the ship to, I attributed to the scene I had +witnessed the night before; and in this, I was confirmed by the +testimony of the officers. Having lost two men by his unseamanlike +conduct, he would have added deliberate murder of a third, to save +himself from the punishment which he knew awaited him. He continued +the same tyrannical conduct, and I had resolved that the moment we +fell in with the admiral to write for a court-martial on this man, +let the consequences be what they might: I thought I should serve my +country and the navy by ridding it of such a monster. + +Several of the officers were under arrest, and notwithstanding the +heat of their cabins in that warm climate, were kept constantly +confined to them with a sentinel at the door. In consequence of +this cruel treatment, one of the officers became deranged. We made +Barbadoes, and running round Needham's Point into Carlisle Bay, we saw +to our mortification, that neither the admiral nor any ship of war was +there, consequently our captain was commanding officer in the port. +Upon this, he became remarkably amiable, supposing if the evil day was +put off, it would be dispensed with altogether; he treated me with +particular attention, hoped we should have some fun ashore; as the +admiral was not come in, we should wait for him; tired of kicking +about at sea, he should take all his _duds_, with him, and bring +himself to an anchor on shore, and not come afloat again till we +saluted his flag. + +Neither the first lieutenant nor myself believed one word of this; +indeed, we always acted upon the exact reverse of what he said; and it +was well we did so in this instance. After we had anchored, he went +ashore, and in about an hour returned, and stated that the admiral was +not expected till next month; that he should, therefore, go and take +up his quarters at Jemmy Cavan's, and not trouble the ship any more +until the admiral arrived; he then left us, taking his trunk and all +his dirty linen, dirty enough it was. + +Some of the officers unfortunately believed that we were to remain, +and followed the captain's example by sending their linen on shore to +be washed. Skysail was firm, and so was I; the lieutenant cocked his +eye, and said, "Messmate, depend on it there is something in the wind. +I have sent one shirt on shore to be washed; and when that comes off, +I will send another; if I lose that it is no great matter." + +That night, at ten o'clock, Captain Jacky came on board, bringing his +trunk and dirty linen, turned the hands up, up anchor, and ran out of +Carlisle Bay and went to sea, leaving most of the officers' linen on +shore. This was one of his tricks. He had received his orders when he +landed in the morning; they were waiting for him, and his coming on +board for his things, was only a run to throw us off our guard, and +I suppose compel us, by the loss of our clothes, to be as dirty +in appearance as he was himself, "but he always liked to make his +officers comfortable." + +We arrived at Nassau, in New Providence, without any remarkable +incident, although the service continued to be carried on in the same +disagreeable manner as ever. I continued, however, to get leave to go +on shore; and finding no prospect of bringing the captain to justice, +determined to quit the ship, if possible. This was effected by +accident, otherwise I should have been much puzzled to have got clear +of her. I fell between the boat and the wharf as I landed, and by the +sudden jerk ruptured a small bloodvessel in my chest; it was of no +great importance in itself, but in that climate required care, and I +made the most of it. They would have carried me on board again, but +I begged to be taken to the hotel. The surgeon of the regiment doing +duty there attended me, and I requested him to make my case as bad +as possible. The captain came to see me--I appeared very ill--his +compassion was like that of the Inquisitor of the Holy Office, +who cures his victim in order to enable him to go through further +torments. His time of sailing arrived, and I was reported to be too +ill to be removed. Determined to have me, he prolonged his stay. I +got better; the surgeon's report was more favourable; but I was still +unwilling to go on board. The captain sent me an affectionate message, +to say that if I did not come, he would send a file of marines to +bring me: he even came himself and threatened me; when, finding there +were no witnesses in the room, I plainly told him that if he persisted +in having me on board, it would be to his own destruction, for that I +was fully determined to bring him to a court-martial for drunkenness +and unofficerlike conduct, the moment we joined the admiral. I told +him of the state in which I had found him. I recapitulated his +blasphemies, and his lubberly conduct in losing the two men; he stared +and endeavoured to explain; I was peremptory, and he whined and gave +in, seeing he was in my power. + +"Well then, my dear fellow," said Jacky, "since you are so very +ill--sorry as I shall be to lose you--I must consent to your staying +behind. I shall find it difficult to replace you; but as the comfort +and happiness of my officers is my first object on all occasions, I +will prefer annoying myself to annoying you." So saying, he held out +his hand to me, which I shook with a hearty good-will, sincerely +hoping that we might never meet again, either in this world or the +next. + +He was afterwards brought to a court-martial, for repeated acts of +drunkenness and cruelty, and was finally dismissed the service. + +In giving this detail of Captain G----'s peculiarities, let it not be +imagined, that even at that period such characters were common in the +service. I have already said, that he was an unique. Impressment +and the want of officers at the early part of the war, gave him an +opportunity of becoming a lieutenant; he took the weak side of the +admiral to obtain his next step, and obtained the command of a sloop, +from repeated solicitation at the Admiralty, and by urging his +claims of long servitude. The service had received serious injury by +admitting men on the quarter-deck from before the mast; it occasioned +there being two classes of officers in the navy--namely, those who had +rank and connections, and those who had entered by the "hawse-holes," +as they were described. The first were favoured when young, and did +not acquire a competent knowledge of their duty; the second, with few +exceptions, as they advanced in their grades, proved, from want of +education, more and more unfit for their stations. These defects have +now been remedied; and as all young men who enter the service must +have a regular education, and consequently be the sons of gentlemen, +a level has been produced, which to a certain degree precludes +favouritism, and perfectly bars the entrance to such men as Captain +G----. + +After the battle of Trafalgar, when England and Europe were indebted +for their safety to the British fleet, the navy became popular, +and the aristocracy crowded into it. This forwarded still more +the melioration of the service, and under the succeeding naval +administration, silent, certain, and gradual improvements, both in +men, officers, and ships, took place. Subsequently, the navy has been +still more fortunate, in having an officer called to its councils, +whose active and constant employment at sea, previous to the peace of +Paris, had given him a thorough insight into its wants and abuses. +Unconnected with party, and unawed by power, he has dared to do his +duty; and it is highly to the credit of the first lord, who has so +long presided at the board, that the suggestions of this officer have +met with due consideration; I can therefore assure my reader, that as +long as his advice is attended to, he need be afraid of meeting with +no more Captain G----'s. + + + + +Chapter XVIII + + There she goes, brimful of anger and jealousy. Mercy on the poor man! + + "_Jealous Wife_." + + + The dreadful fish that hath deserved the name + Of Death. + + SPENSER. + + +As the brig moved out of the harbour of Nassau, I moved out of bed; +and as she set her royals and made sail, I put on my hat and walked +out. The officers of the regiment quartered there, kindly invited me +to join their mess; and the colonel enhanced the value of the offer +by assigning for me good apartments in the barracks. I was instantly +removed to cleanly and comfortable lodgings. I soon regained my +strength, and was able to sit at the table, where I found thirty-five +young officers, living for the day, careless of the morrow; and, +beyond that never bestowing a thought. It is a singular fact, that +where life is most precarious, men are most indifferent about its +preservation; and, where death is constantly before our eyes, as in +this country, eternity is seldom in our thoughts: but so it is; and +the rule extends still further in despotic countries. Where the union +between the head and shoulders may be dissolved in a moment by the +sword of a tyrant, life is not so valued, and death loses its +terrors; hence the apathy and indifference with which men view their +executioners in that state of society. It seems as if existence, like +estates, was valuable in proportion to the validity of the title-deeds +by which they are held. + +To digress no more. Although I was far from being even commonly +virtuous, which is about tantamount to absolute wickedness, I was no +longer the thoughtless mortal I had ever been since I left school. +The society of Emily, and her image graven on my heart; the close +confinement to the brig, and the narrow escape from death in the +second attempt to save the poor sailor's life, had altogether +contributed their share to a kind of temporary reformation, if not +to a disgust to the coarser descriptions of vice. The lecture I had +received from Emily on deceit, and the detestable conduct of my last +captain, had, as I thought, almost completed my reformation. Hitherto +I felt I had acted wrong, without having the power to act right. +I forgot that I had never made the experiment. The declaration of +Captain G.'s atheism was so far from converting me, that from that +moment I thought more seriously than ever of religion. So great was +my contempt for his character, that I knew whatever he said must be +wrong, and, like the Spartan drunken slave, he gave me the greatest +horror of vice. + +Such was my reasoning, and such my sentiments, previous to any +relapse into sin or folly. I knew its heinousness. I transgressed and +repented; habit was all-powerful in me; and the only firm support +I could have looked to for assistance was, unfortunately, very +superficially attended to. Religion, for any good purposes, was +scarcely in my thoughts. My system was a sort of Socratic heathen +philosophy--a moral code, calculated to take a man tolerably safe +through a quiet world, but not to extricate him from a labyrinth of +long-practised iniquity. + +The thoughtless and vicious conduct of my companions became to me a +source of serious reflection. Far from following their example, I felt +myself some degrees better than they were; and in the pride of my +heart thanked God that I was not like these publicans. My pharisaical +arrogance concealed from me the mortifying fact that I was much worse, +and with very slight hopes of amendment. Humility had not yet entered +my mind; but it was the only basis on which any religious improvement +could be created--the only chance of being saved. I rather became +refined in vice, without quitting it. Gross and sensual gratification, +so easily obtained in the West Indies, was disgusting to me; yet +I scrupled not to attempt the seduction of innocence, rather more +gratified in the pursuit than in the enjoyment, which soon palled, and +drove me after other objects. + +I had, however, little occasion to exert my tact in this art in the +Bahama Islands, where, as in all the other islands of the West Indies, +there is a class of women, born of white fathers and mustee or mulatto +women, nearly approaching in complexion to the European; many of them +are brunettes, with long black hair, very pretty, good eyes, and often +elegant figures. These ladies are too proud of the European blood in +their veins to form an alliance with any male who has a suspicion of +black in his genealogical table; consequently they seldom are married +unless from interested motives, when, having acquired large property +by will, they are sought in wedlock by the white settlers. + +So circumstanced, these girls prefer an intercourse with the object of +their choice to a legal marriage with a person of inferior birth; and, +having once made their selection, an act of infidelity is of rare +occurrence among them. Their affection and constancy will stand the +test of time and of long separation; generous to prodigality, but +jealous, and irritable in their jealousy, even to the use of the +dagger and poison. + +One of these young ladies found sufficient allurement in my personal +charms to surrender at discretion, and we lived in that sort of +familiar intercourse which, in the West Indies, is looked upon as a +matter of necessity between the parties, and of indifference by every +one else. I lived on in this Epicurean style for some months; until, +most unfortunately, my _chère amie_ found a rival in the daughter of +an officer, high in rank, on the island. Smitten with my person, this +fair one had not the prudence to conceal her partiality: my vanity +was too much flattered not to take advantage of her sentiments in my +favour; and, as usual, flirtation and philandering occupied most of +my mornings, and sometimes my evenings, in the company of this fair +American. + +Scandal is a goddess who reigns paramount, not only in Great Britain, +but also in all his Majesty's plantations; and her votaries very soon +selected me as the target of their archery. My pretty Carlotta became +jealous; she taxed me with inconstancy. I denied the charge; and as a +proof of my innocence, she obtained from me a promise that I should go +no more to the house of her rival; but this promise I took very good +care to evade, and to break. For a whole fortnight, my domestic peace +was interrupted either by tears, or by the most voluble and outrageous +solos, for I never replied after the first day. + +A little female slave, one morning, made me a signal to follow her to +a retired part of the garden. I had shewn this poor little creature +some acts of kindness, for which she amply repaid me. Sometimes I had +obtained for her a holiday--sometimes saved her a whipping, and +at others had given her a trifle of money; she therefore became +exceedingly attached to me, and as she saw her mistress's anger daily +increase, she knew what it would probably end in, and watched my +safety like a little guardian sylph. + +"No drinkee coffee, Massa," said she, "Missy putty obeah stuff in." + +As soon as she had said this, she disappeared, and I went into the +house, where I found Carlotta preparing the breakfast; she had an old +woman with her, who seemed to be doing something which she was not +very willing I should see. I sat down carelessly, humming a tune, with +my face to a mirror, and my back to Carlotta, so that I was able to +watch her motions without her perceiving it. She was standing near +the fireplace, the coffee was by her, on the table, and the old woman +crouched in the chimney corner, with her bleared eyes fixed on the +embers. Carlotta seemed in doubt; she pressed her hands forcibly on +her forehead; took up the coffee-pot to pour me out a cup, then sat +it down again; the old woman muttered something in their language; +Carlotta stamped with her little foot, and poured out the coffee. +She brought it to me--trembled as she placed it before me--seemed +unwilling to let go her hold, and her hand still grasped the cup, as +if she would take it away again. The old woman growled and muttered +something, in which I could only hear the name of her rival mentioned. +This was enough: the eyes of Carlotta lighted up like a flame; she +quitted her hold of the salver, retreated to the fireplace, sat +herself down, covered her face, and left me, as she supposed, to make +my last earthly repast. + +"Carlotta," said I, with a sudden and vehement exclamation. She +started up, and the blood rushed to her face and neck, in a profusion +of blushes, which are perfectly visible through the skins of these +mulattos. "Carlotta," I repeated, "I had a dream last night, and who +do you think came to me? It was Obeah!" (She started at the name.) "He +told me not to drink coffee this morning, but to make the old woman +drink it." At these words the beldam sprang up. "Come here, you old +hag," said I. She approached trembling, for she saw that escape from +me was impossible, and that her guilt was detected. I seized a sharp +knife, and taking her by her few remaining grey and woolly hairs, +said, "Obeah's work must be done: I do not order it, but he commands +it; drink that coffee instantly." + +So powerful was the name of Obeah on the ear of the hag, that she +dreaded it more than my brandished knife. She never thought of +imploring mercy, for she supposed it was useless after the discovery, +and that her hour was come; she therefore lifted the cup to her +withered lip, and was just going to fulfil her destiny and to drink, +when I dashed it out of her hand, and broke it in a thousand pieces on +the floor, darting, at the same time, a fierce look at Carlotta, who +threw herself at my feet, which she fervently kissed in an agony of +conflicting passions. + +"Kill me! kill me!" ejaculated she; "it was I that did it! Obeah is +great--he has saved you. Kill me, and I shall die happy, now you are +safe--do kill me!" + +I listened to these frantic exclamations with perfect calmness. When +she was a little more composed, I desired her to rise. She obeyed, and +looked the image of despair, for she thought I should immediately quit +her for the arms of her more fortunate rival, and she considered my +innocence as fully established by the appearance of the deity. + +"Carlotta," said I, "what would you have done if you had succeeded in +killing me?" + +"I will shew you," said she; when, going to a closet, the took out +another basin of coffee; and before I could dash it from her lips, as +I had the former one from the black woman, the infatuated girl had +swallowed a small portion of it. + +"What else can I do?" said she; "my happiness is gone for ever." + +"No, Carlotta," said I; "I do not wish for your death, though you have +plotted mine. I have been faithful to you, and loved you, until you +made this attempt." + +"Will you forgive me before I die?" said she; "for die I must, now +that I know you will quit me!" Uttering these words, she threw herself +on the floor with violence, and her head coming in contact with the +broken fragments of the basin, she cut herself, and bled so copiously +that she fainted. The old woman had fled, and I was left alone with +her, for poor little Sophy was frightened, and had hidden herself. + +I lifted Carlotta from the floor, and, placing her in a chair, I +washed her face with cold water; and having staunched the blood, +I laid her on her bed, when she began to breathe and to sob +convulsively. I sat myself by her side; and as I contemplated her +pale face and witnessed her grief, I fell into a train of melancholy +retrospection on my numerous acts of vice and folly. + +"How many warnings," said I, "how many lessons am I to receive before +I shall reform? How narrowly have I escaped being sent to my account +'unanealed' and unprepared! What must have been my situation if I had +at this moment been called into the presence of my offended Creator? +This poor girl is pure and innocent, compared with me, taking into +consideration the advantages of education on my side, and the want +of it on hers. What has produced all this misery and the dreadful +consequences which might have ensued, but my folly in trifling with +the feelings of an innocent girl, and winning her affections merely +to gratify my own vanity; at the same time that I have formed a +connection with this unhappy creature, the breaking of which will +never cause me one hour's regret, while it will leave her in misery, +and will, in all probability, embitter all her future existence? What +shall I do? Forgive, as I hope to be forgiven: the fault was more mine +than hers." + +I then knelt down and most fervently repeated the Lord's Prayer, +adding some words of thanksgiving, for my undeserved escape from +death. I rose up and kissed her cold, damp forehead; she was sensible +of my kindness, and her poor head found relief in a flood of tears. +Her eyes again gazed on me, sparkling with gratitude and love, after +all she had gone through. I endeavoured to compose her; the loss of +blood had produced the best effects; and, having succeeded in calming +her conflicting passions, she fell into a sound sleep. + +The reader who knows the West Indies, or knows human nature, will not +be surprised that I should have continued this connection as long as I +remained on the island. From the artless manner in which Carlotta had +conducted her plot; from her gestures and her agitation, I was quite +sure that she was a novice in this sort of crime, and that should she +ever relapse into her paroxysm of jealousy, I should be able to detect +any farther attempt on my life. Of this, however, I had no fears, +having by degrees discontinued my visits to the young lady who had +been the cause of our fracas; and I never afterwards, while on the +island, gave Carlotta the slightest reason to suspect my constancy. I +was much censured for my conduct to the young lady, as the attentions +I had shewn her, and her marked preference for me, had driven away +suitors who really were in earnest, and they never returned to her +again. + +In these islands, the naturalist would find a vast store to reward +investigation; they abound with a variety of plants, birds, fish, +shells, and minerals. It was here that Columbus made his first +landing, but in which of the islands I am not exactly certain; though +I am very sure he did not find them quite so agreeable as I did, for +he very soon quitted them, and steered away for St Domingo. + +It is not, perhaps, generally known, that New Providence was the +island selected for his residence by Blackbeard, the famous pirate; +the citadel that stands on the hill above the town of Nassau, is built +on the site of the fortress which contained the treasure of that +famous freebooter. A curious circumstance occurred during my stay +on this island, and which, beyond all doubt, was connected with the +adventures of those extraordinary people, known by the appellation of +Buccaneers. Some workmen were digging near the foot of the hill under +the fort, when they discovered some quicksilver, and on inspection, a +very considerable quantity was found; it had evidently been a part of +the plunder of the pirates, buried in casks or skins, and these having +decayed, the liquid ore naturally escaped down the hill. + +Though not indifferent to the pleasures of the table, I was far from +resigning myself to the Circean life led by the generality of young +military men in the Bahamas. + +The education which I had received, and which placed me far above +the common run of society in the colonies, induced me to seek for a +companion whose mind had received equal cultivation; and such a one +I found in Charles ----, a young lieutenant in the ---- regiment, +quartered at Nassau. Our intimacy became the closer, in proportion as +we discovered the sottish habits and ignorance of those around us. We +usually spent our mornings in reading the classic authors with which +we were both familiar; we spouted our Latin verses; we fenced; and we +amused ourselves, occasionally, with a game of billiards, but never +ventured our friendship on a stake for money. When the heat of the day +had passed off, we strolled out, paid a few visits, or rambled over +the island; keeping as much aloof from the barracks as possible, where +the manner of living was so very uncongenial to our notions. The +officers began their day about noon, when they sat down to breakfast; +after that, they separated to their different quarters, to read the +novels, with which the presses of England and France inundated these +islands, to the great deterioration of morals. These books, which they +read lounging on their backs, or laid beside them and fell asleep +over, occupied the hottest part of the day; the remainder, till the +hour of dinner arrived, was consumed in visiting and gossiping, or in +riding to procure an appetite for dinner. Till four in the morning, +their time was wholly devoted to smoking and drinking; their beds +received them in a state of intoxication more or less; parade, at nine +o'clock, forced them out with a burning brain and parched tongue; they +rushed into the sea, and found some refreshment in the cool water, +which enabled them to stand upright in front of their men; the formal +duty over, they retired again to their beds, where they lay till noon, +and then to breakfast. + +Such were their days; can it be wondered at that our islands are fatal +to the constitution of Europeans, when this is their manner of life in +a climate always disposed to take advantage of any excess? The men too +readily followed the example of their officers, and died off in the +same rapid manner; one of the most regular employments of the morning +was to dig graves for the victims of the night. Four or five of these +receptacles was thought a moderate number. Such was the fatal apathy +in which these officers existed, that the approach, nay; even +the certainty of death, gave them no apparent concern, caused no +preparation, excited no serious reflection. They followed the corpse +of a brother-officer to the grave in military procession. These +ceremonies were always conducted in the evening, and often have I seen +these thoughtless young men throwing stones at the lanthorns which +were carried before them to light them to the burying-ground. + +I was always an early riser, and believe I owe much of my good health +to this custom. I used to delight in a lovely tropical morning, when, +with a cigar in my mouth, I walked into the market. What would Sir +William Curtis, or Sir Charles Flower have said, could they have seen, +as I did, the numbers of luxurious turtle lying on their backs, and +displaying their rich calapee to the epicurean purchaser? Well, indeed +might the shade of Apicius[A] lament that America and turtle were not +discovered in his days. There were the guanas, too, in abundance, with +their mouths sewed up to prevent their biting; these are excellent +food, although bearing so near a resemblance to the alligator, and +its diminutive European representative, the harmless lizard. Muscovy +ducks, parrots, monkeys, pigeons, and fish. Pine apples abounded, +oranges, pomegranates, limes, Bavarias, plantains, love apples, +Abbogada pears (better known by the name of subaltern's butter), and +many other fruits, all piled in heaps, were to be had at a low price. +Such was the stock of a New Providence market. + +[Footnote A: Lyttleton's "Dialogues of the Dead."] + +Of the human species, buyers and vendors, there were black, brown and +fair; from the fairest skin, with light blue eyes, and flaxen hair, to +the jet-black "Day and Martin" of Ethiopia; from the loveliest form +of Nature's mould, to the disgusting squaw, whose flaccid mammae hung +like inverted bottles to her girdle, or are extended over her shoulder +to give nourishment to the little imp perched on her back; and here +the urchin sits the live long day, while the mother performs all the +drudgery of the field, the house, or the market. + +The confusion of Babel did not surpass the present gabble of a West +India market. The loud and everlasting chatter of the black women, old +and young (for black ladies _can_ talk as well as white ones); the +screams of children, parrots, and monkeys; black boys and girls, clad +_à la Venus_, white teeth, red lips, black skins, and elephant legs, +formed altogether a scene well worth looking at; and now, since the +steamers have acquired so much velocity, I should think would not be +an unpleasant lounge for the fastidious _ennuyé_ of France or England. +The beauty and coolness of the morning, the lovely sky, and the +cheerfulness of the slaves, whom our morbid philanthropists wish to +render happy, by making discontented, would altogether amply repay the +trouble and expense of a voyage, to those who have leisure or money +enough to enable them to visit the tropical islands. + +The delightful, and, indeed, indispensable amusement of bathing, is +particularly dangerous in these countries. In the shallows you are +liable to be struck by the stingray, a species of skate, with a sharp +barb about the middle of its tail; and the effect of the wound is so +serious, that I have known a person to be in a state of frenzy from it +for nearly forty-eight hours. In deeper water, the sharks are not only +numerous but ravenous; and I sometimes gratified their appetites, and +my own love of excitement, by purchasing the carcass of a dead cow, or +horse. This I towed off, and anchored with a thick rope and a large +stone; then, from my boat, with a harpoon, I amused myself in striking +these devils as they crowded round for their meal. My readers will, +I fear, think I am much too fond of relating adventures among these +marine undertakers; but the following incident will not be found +without interest. + +In company with Charles, one beautiful afternoon, rambling over the +rocky cliffs at the back of the island, we came to a spot where the +stillness, and the clear transparency of the water invited us to +bathe. It was not deep. As we stood above, on the promontory, we could +see the bottom in every part. Under the little headland, which formed +the opposite side of the cove, there was a cavern, to which, as the +shore was steep, there was no access but by swimming, and we resolved +to explore it. We soon reached its mouth, and were enchanted with its +romantic grandeur and wild beauty. It extended, we found, a long way +back, and had several natural baths, into all of which we successively +threw ourselves, each, as they receded farther from the mouth of the +cavern, being colder than the last. The tide, it was evident, had +free ingress, and renewed the water every twelve hours. Here we +thoughtlessly amused ourselves for some time, quoting Acis and +Galatea, Diana, and her nymphs, and every classic story applicable to +the scene. + +At length, the declining sun warned us that it was time to take our +departure from the cave, when, at no great distance from us, we saw +the back, or dorsal fin of a monstrous shark above the surface of the +water, and his whole length visible beneath it. We looked at him +and at each other with dismay, hoping that he would soon take his +departure, and go in search of other prey; but the rogue swam to and +fro, just like a frigate blockading an enemy's port, and we felt, I +suppose, very much as we used to make the French and Dutch feel last +war, at Brest and the Texel. + +The sentinel paraded before us, about ten or fifteen yards in front of +the cave, tack and tack, waiting only to serve one, if not both of us, +as we should have served a shrimp or an oyster. We had no intention, +however, in this, as in other instances, of "throwing ourselves on +the mercy of the court." In vain did we look for relief from other +quarters; the promontory above us was inaccessible; the tide was +rising, and the sun touching the clear blue edge of the horizon. + +I, being the leader, pretended to a little knowledge in ichthyology, +and told my companion that fish could hear as well as see, and that +therefore the less we said the better; and the sooner we retreated out +of his sight, the sooner he would take himself off. This was our only +chance, and that a poor one; for the flow of the water would soon have +enabled him to enter the cave and help himself, as he seemed perfectly +acquainted with the _locale_, and knew that we had no mode of retreat +but by the way we came. We drew back, out of sight; and I don't know +when I ever passed a more unpleasant quarter of an hour. A suit in +Chancery, or even a spring lounge in Newgate, would have been almost +luxury to what I felt when the shades of night began to darken the +mouth of our cave, and this infernal monster continued to parade, like +a water-bailiff, before its door. At last, not seeing the shark's fin +above water, I made a sign to Charles that, _coûte qui coûte_, we must +swim for it; for we had notice to quit, by the tide; and if we did +not depart, should soon have an execution in the house. We had been +careful not to utter a word; and, silently pressing each other by +the hand, we slipped into the water; when, recommending ourselves to +Providence, which, for my part, I seldom forgot when I was in imminent +danger, we struck out manfully. I must own I never felt more assured +of destruction, not even when I swam through the blood of the poor +sailor; for then the sharks had something to occupy them, but here +they had nothing else to do but to look after us. We had the benefit +of their undivided attention. + +My sensations were indescribably horrible. I may occasionally write +or talk of the circumstance with levity, but whenever I recall it to +mind, I tremble at the bare recollection of the dreadful fate that +seemed inevitable. My companion was not so expert a swimmer as I was, +so that I distanced him many feet, when I heard him utter a faint cry. +I turned round, convinced that the shark had seized him, but it was +not so; my having left him so far behind had increased his terror, and +induced him to draw my attention. I returned to him, held him up, and +encouraged him. Without this, he would certainly have sunk; he revived +with my help, and we reached the sandy beach in safety, having eluded +our enemy; who, when he neither saw or heard us, had, as I concluded +he would, quitted the spot. + +Once more on terra firma, we lay gasping for some minutes before we +spoke. What my companion's thoughts were, I do not know; mine were +replete with gratitude to God, and renewed vows of amendment; and I +have every reason to think, that although Charles had not so much room +for reform as myself, his feelings were perfectly in unison with my +own. We never afterwards repeated this amusement, though we frequently +talked of our escape, and laughed at our terrors; yet on these +occasions our conversation always took a serious turn: and, upon the +whole, I am convinced that this adventure did us both a vast deal of +good. + +I had now been six months in these islands, had perfectly recovered +my health, and became anxious for active employment. The brilliant +successes of our rear-admiral at Washington made me wish for a share +of the honour and glory which my brethren in arms were acquiring on +the coast of North America; but my wayward fate sent me in a very +opposite direction. + + + + +Chapter XIX + + _Mira_. How came we ashore? + _Pro_. By Providence divine. + + * * * * * + + Sit still, and hear the last of our sea-sorrow. + Here in this island we arrived. + + "_Tempest_." + + +A frigate called at the island for turtle; and, having represented my +case to the captain, he offered to take me on board, telling me at the +same time that he was going much farther to the southward, to relieve +another cruiser, who would then return to England, and the captain of +her would, no doubt, give me a passage home. I accordingly made hasty +preparations for my departure; took leave of all my kind friends at +the barracks, for kind indeed they were to _me_, although thoughtless +and foolish towards themselves. I bade adieu to the families on the +island, in whose houses and at whose tables I had experienced the most +liberal hospitality; and last, though not least, I took leave of poor +Carlotta. + +This was a difficult task to perform, but it was imperative. I told +her that I was ordered on board by my captain, who, being a very +different person from the last, I dare not disobey. I promised to +return to her soon. I offered her money and presents, but she would +accept of nothing but a small locket, to wear for my sake. I purchased +the freedom of poor Sophy, the black girl, who had saved my life. The +little creature wept bitterly at my coming away; but I could do no +more for her. As for Carlotta, I learned afterwards that she went on +board every ship that arrived, to gain intelligence of me, who seldom +or ever gave her a thought. + +We sailed; and, steering away to the south-east with moderate winds +and fine weather, captured, at the end of that time, a large American +ship, which had made a devious course from the French coast, in hopes +of avoiding our cruisers; she was about four hundred tons, deeply +laden, and bound to Laguira, with a valuable cargo. The captain sent +for me, and told me that if I chose to take charge of her, as prize +master, I might proceed to England direct. This plan exactly suited +me, and I consented, only begging to have a boatswain's mate, named +Thompson, to go along with me; he was an old shipmate, and had been +one of my gig's crew when we had the affair in Basque Roads; he was a +steady, resolute, quiet, sober, raw-boned Caledonian, from Aberdeen, +and a man that I knew would stand by me in the hour of need. He was +ordered to go with me, and the necessary supply of provisions and +spirits were put on board. I received my orders, and took my leave of +my new captain, who was both a good seaman and an excellent officer. + +When I got on board the prize, I found all the prisoners busy packing +up their things, and they became exceedingly alert in placing them in +the boat which was to convey them on board the frigate. Indeed they +all crowded into her with an unusual degree of activity; but this did +not particularly strike my attention at the time. My directions were +to retain the captain and one man with me, in order to condemn the +vessel in the Court of Admiralty. + +Occupied with many objects at once, all important to me, as I was so +soon to part company with the frigate, I did not recollect this part +of my orders, and that I was detaining the boat, until the young +midshipman who had charge of her asked me if he might return on board +and take the prisoners. I then went on deck, and seeing the whole of +them, with their chests and bags, seated very quietly in the boat, +and ready to shove off, I desired the captain and one of the American +seamen to come on board again, and to bring their clothes with them. +I did not remark the unwillingness of the captain to obey this +order, until told of it by the midshipman; his chest and goods were +immediately handed in upon deck, and the signal from the frigate being +repeated, with a light for the boat to return (for it was now dark), +she shoved off hastily, and was soon out of sight. + +"Stop the boat! for God's sake stop the boat!" cried the captain. + +"Why should I stop the boat?" said I; "my orders are positive, and you +must remain with me." + +I then went below for a minute or two, and the captain followed me. + +"As you value your life, sir," said he, "stop the boat." + +"Why?" asked I, eagerly. + +"Because, sir," said he, "the ship has been scuttled by the men, and +will sink in a few hours: you cannot save her, for you cannot get at +her leaks." + +I now did indeed see the necessity of stopping the boat; but it was +too late: she was out of sight. The lanthorn, the signal for her +return, had been hauled down, a proof that she had got on board. I +hoisted two lights at the mizen peak, and ordered a musket to be +fired; but, unfortunately, the cartridges had either not been put in +the boat which brought me, or they had been taken back in her. One of +my lights went out; the other was not seen by the frigate. We hoisted +another light, but it gained no notice: the ship had evidently made +sail. I stood after her as fast as I could, in hopes of her seeing us +that night, or taking us out the next morning, should we be afloat. + +But my vessel, deeply laden, was already getting waterlogged, and +would not sail on a wind more than four miles an hour. All hope in +that quarter vanished. I then endeavoured to discover from the captain +where the leaks were, that we might stop them; but he had been +drinking so freely, that I could get nothing from him but Dutch +courage and braggadocia. The poor black man, who had been left with +the captain, was next consulted. All he knew was, that, when at +Bordeaux, the captain had caused holes to be bored in the ship's +bottom, that he might pull the plugs out whenever he liked, swearing, +at the same time, that she never should enter a British port. He did +not know where the leaks were situated, though it was evident to me +that they were in the after and also in the fore parts of the ship, +low down, and now deep under water, both inside as well as out. The +black man added, that the captain had let the water in, and that was +all he knew. + +I again spoke to the captain, but he was too far gone to reason with: +he had got drunk to die, because he was afraid to die sober--no +unusual case with sailors. + +"Don't tell me; d----n me, who is a-feard to die? I arn't. I swore she +should never enter a British port, and I have kept my word." + +He then began to use curses and execrations; and, at last, fell on the +deck in a fit of drunken frenzy. + +I now called my people all together, and having stated to them the +peril of our situation, we agreed that a large boat, which lay on the +booms, should be instantly hoisted out, and stowed with every thing +necessary for a voyage. Our clothes, bread, salt meat, and water, were +put into her, with my sextant and spy-glass. The liquor, which was in +the cabin, I gave in charge to the midshipman who was sent with me; +and, having completely stowed our boat, and prepared her with a good +lug-sail, we made her fast with a couple of stout tow-ropes, and +veered her astern, with four men in her, keeping on our course in the +supposed track of the frigate till daylight. + +That wished-for hour arrived, but no frigate was to be seen, even from +the mast-head. The ship was getting deeper and deeper, and we prepared +to take to the boat. I calculated the nearest part of South America to +be seven hundred miles from us, and that we were more than twice that +distance from Rio Janeiro. I did not, however, despond, for, under all +circumstances, we were extremely well off: and I inspired the men with +so much confidence, that they obeyed in everything, with the utmost +alacrity and cheerfulness, except in one single point. + +Finding the ship could not in all probability float more than an hour +or two, I determined to quit her, and ordered the boat alongside. The +men got into her, stepped the mast, hooked on the lug-sail, ready to +hoist at my orders; and, without my bidding, had spread my boat cloak +in the stern-sheets, and made a comfortable place for me to repose in. +The master proceeded to get into the boat, but the men repulsed him +with kicks, blows, and hisses, swearing most dreadfully that if he +attempted to come in, they would throw him overboard. Although in +some measure I participated in their angry feeling, yet I could not +reconcile myself to leave a fellow-creature thus to perish, even in +the pit which he had dug for others, and this too at a time when we +needed every indulgence from the Almighty for ourselves, and every +assistance from his hand to conduct us into a port. + +"He deserves to die; it is all his own doings," said they; "come into +the boat yourself, Sir, or we must shove off without you." + +The poor captain--who, after sleeping four hours, had recovered his +senses, and felt all the horror of his situation--wept, screamed, tore +his hair, laid hold of my coat, from which only the strength of my men +could disengage him. He clung to life with a passion of feeling which +I never saw in a criminal condemned by the law; he fell on his knees +before me, as he appealed to us all, collectively and separately; he +reminded us of his wife and starving children at Baltimore, and he +implored us to think of them and of our own. + +I was melted to tears, I confess; but my men heard him with the most +stoical unconcern. Two of them threw him over to the opposite side of +the deck; and before he could recover from the violence of the fall, +pushed me into the boat, and shoved off. The wretched man had by this +time crawled over to the side we had just left; and throwing himself +on his knees, again screamed out, "Oh, mercy, mercy, mercy!--For God's +sake, have mercy, if you expect any!--Oh, God! my wife and babes!" + +His prayers, I lament to say, had no effect on the exasperated seamen. +He then fell into a fit of cursing and blasphemy, evidently bereft of +his senses; and in this state he continued for some minutes, while we +lay alongside, the bowman holding on with the boat-hook only. I was +secretly determined not to leave him, although I foresaw a mutiny in +the boat in consequence. At length, I gave the order to shove off. The +unhappy captain, who, till that moment, might have entertained some +faint hope from the lurking compassion which he perceived I felt for +him, now resigned himself to despair of a more sullen and horrible +aspect. He sat himself down on one of the hen-coops, and gazed on us +with a ghastly eye. I cannot remember ever seeing a more shocking +picture of human misery. + +While I looked at him, the black man, Mungo, who belonged to the ship, +sprang overboard from the boat, and swam back to the wreck. Seizing a +rope which hung from the gangway, he ascended the side, and joined his +master. We called to him to come back, or we should leave him behind. + +"No, massa," replied the faithful creature; "me no want to lib: no +takee Massa Green, no takee me! Mungo lib good many years wi massa +cappen. Mungo die wi massa, and go back to Guinea!" + +I now thought we had given the captain a sufficient lesson for his +treachery and murderous intentions. Had I, indeed, ever seriously +intended to leave him, the conduct of poor Mungo would have awakened +me to a sense of my duty. I ordered Thompson, who was steering the +boat, to put the helm a-starboard, and lay her alongside again. No +sooner was this command given, than three or four of the men jumped up +in a menacing attitude, and swore that they would not go back for him; +that he was the cause of all their sufferings; and that if I chose to +share his fate, I might, but into the boat he should not come. One of +them, more daring than the rest, attempted to take the tiller out of +Thompson's hand; but the trusty seaman seized him by the collar, and +in an instant threw him overboard. The other men were coming aft +to avenge this treatment of their leader; but I drew my sword, and +pointing it at the breast of the nearest mutineer, desired him, +on pain of instant death, to return to his seat. He had heard my +character, and knew that I was not to be trifled with. + +A mutineer is easily subdued with common firmness. He obeyed, but was +very sullen, and I heard many mutinous expressions among the men. One +of them said that I was not their officer--that I did not belong to +the frigate. + +"That," I replied, "is a case of which I shall not allow you to be the +judges. I hold in my pocket a commission from the King's Lord High +Admiral, or the commissioners for executing that duty. Your captain, +and mine also, holds a similar commission. Under this authority I +act. Let me see the man that dares dispute it--I will hang him at the +yard-arm of the wreck before she goes down;" and, looking at the man +whom Thompson had thrown overboard, and who still held by the gunwale +of the boat, without daring to get in, I asked him if he would obey +me or not? He replied that he would, and hoped I would forgive him. +I said that my forgiveness would depend entirely on the conduct of +himself and the others; that he must recollect that if our own ship, +or any other man-of-war, picked us up, he was liable, with three or +four more, to be hanged for mutiny; and that nothing but his and their +future obedience could save them from that punishment, whenever we +reached a port. + +This harangue had a very tranquillising effect. The offenders all +begged pardon, and assured me they would deserve my forgiveness by +their future submission. + +All this passed at some little distance from the wreck, but within +hearing; and while it was going on, the wind, which had been fair when +we put off, gradually died away, and blew faintly from the south-west, +directly towards the sinking wreck. I took advantage of this +circumstance to read them a lecture. When I had subdued them, and +worked a little on their feelings, I said I never knew any good come +of cruelty: whenever a ship or a boat had left a man behind who might +have been saved, that disaster or destruction had invariably attended +those who had so cruelly acted; that I was quite sure we never +should escape from this danger, if we did not show mercy to our +fellow-creatures. "God," said I, "has shown mercy to us, in giving us +this excellent boat, to save us in our imminent danger; and He +seems to say to us now, 'Go back to the wreck, and rescue your +fellow-sufferer.' The wind blows directly towards her, and is foul for +the point in which we intend to steer; hasten, then," pursued I, "obey +the Divine will; do your duty, and trust in God. I shall then be proud +to command you, and have no doubt of bringing you safe into port." + +This was the "pliant hour;" they sprang upon their oars, and pulled +back to the wreck with alacrity. The poor captain, who had witnessed +all that passed, watched the progress of his cause with deep anxiety. +No sooner did the boat touch the ship, than he leaped into her, fell +down on his knees, and thanked God aloud for his deliverance. He then +fell on my neck, embraced me, kissed my cheek, and wept like a girl. +The sailors, meanwhile, who never bear malice long, good-naturedly +jumped up, and assisted him in getting his little articles into the +boat; and as Mungo followed his master, shook hands with him all +round, and swore he should be a black prince when he went back to +Guinea. We also took in one or two more little articles of general +use, which had been forgotten in our former hurry. + +We now shoved off for the last time; and had not proceeded more than +two hundred yards from the ship, when she gave a heavy lurch on one +side, recovered it, and rolled as deep on the other; then, as if +endued with life and instinct, gave, a pitch, and went down, head +foremost, into the fathomless deep. We had scarcely time to behold +this awful scene, when the wind again sprang up fair, from its old +quarter, the east. + +"There," said I, "Heaven has declared itself in your favour already. +You have got your fair wind again." + +We thanked God for this; and having set our sail, I shaped my course +for Cape St Thomas, and we went to our frugal dinner with cheerful and +grateful hearts. + +The weather was fine--the sea tolerably smooth--and as we had plenty +of provisions and water, we did not suffer much, except from an +apprehension of a change of wind, and the knowledge of our precarious +situation. On the fifth day after leaving the wreck we discovered land +at a great distance. I knew it to be the island of Trinidad and the +rocks of Martin Vas. This island, which lies in latitude twenty +degrees south, and longitude thirty degrees west, is not to be +confounded with the island of the same name on the coast of Terra +Firma, in the West Indies, and now a British colony. + +On consulting Horseberg, which I had in the boat, I found that the +island which we were now approaching was formerly inhabited by the +Portuguese, but long since abandoned. I continued steering towards +it during the night, until we heard the breakers roaring against the +rocks, when I hove-to, to windward of the land, till daylight. + +The morning presented to our view a precipitous and rugged iron-bound +coast, with high and pointed rocks, frowning defiance over the +unappeaseable and furious waves which broke incessantly at their feet, +and recoiled to repeat the blow. Thus for ages had they been employed, +and thus for ages will they continue, without making any impression +visible to the eye of man. To land was impossible on the part of the +coast now under our inspection, and we coasted along, in hopes of +finding some haven into which we might haul our boat, and secure her. +The island appeared to be about nine miles long, evidently of volcanic +formation, an assemblage of rocky mountains towering several hundred +feet above the level of the sea. It was barren, except at the summit +of the hills, where some trees formed a coronet, at once beautiful +and refreshing, but tantalising to look at, as they appeared +utterly inaccessible; and even supposing I could have discovered a +landing-place, I was in great doubt whether I should have availed +myself of it, as the island appeared to produce nothing which could +have added to our comfort, while delay would only have uselessly +consumed our provisions. There did not appear to be a living creature +on the island, and the danger of approaching to find a landing-place +was most imminent. + +This unpromising appearance induced me to propose that we should +continue our course to Rio Janeiro. The men were of another opinion. +They said they had been too long afloat, cooped up, and that they +should prefer remaining on the island to risking their lives any +longer, in so frail a boat, on the wide ocean. We were still debating, +when we came to a small spot of sand, on which we discovered two wild +hogs, which we conjectured had come down to feed on the shell fish; +this decided them, and I consented to run to leeward of the island, +and seek for a landing-place. We sounded the west end, following the +remarks of Horseberg, and ran for the cove of the Nine-Pin Rock. As we +opened it, a scene of grandeur presented itself, which we had never +met with before, and which in its kind is probably unrivalled in +nature. An enormous rock rose, nearly perpendicularly, out of the sea, +to the height of nine hundred or one thousand feet. It was as narrow +at the base as it was at the top, and was formed exactly in the shape +of the nine-pin, from which, it derives its name. The sides appeared +smooth and even to the top, which was covered with verdure, and was so +far above us that the sea birds, which in myriads screamed around it, +were scarcely visible two-thirds of the way up. The sea beat violently +against its base--the feathered tribe, in endless variety, had been +for ages the undisturbed tenants of this natural monument; all its +jutting points and little projections were covered with their white +dung, and it seemed to me a wonderful effort of Nature, which had +placed this mass in the position which it held, in spite of the utmost +efforts of the winds and waves of the wide ocean. + +Another curious phenomenon appeared at the other end of the cove. The +lava had poured down into the sea, and formed a stratum; a second +river of fused rock had poured again over the first, and had cooled so +rapidly as to hang suspended, not having joined the former strata, +but leaving a vacuum between for the water to fill up. The sea dashed +violently between the two beds, and spouted magnificently through +holes in the upper bed of lava to the height of sixty feet, resembling +much the spouting of a whale, but with a noise and force infinitely +greater. The sound indeed was tremendous, hollow, and awful. I could +not help mentally adoring the works of the Creator, and my heart sunk +within me at my own insignificance, folly, and wickedness. + +As we were now running along the shore, looking for our landing-place, +and just going to take in the sail, the American captain, who sat +close to the man at the helm, seemed attentively watching something on +the larboard bow of the boat. In an instant he exclaimed, "Put your +helm, my good fellow, port-hard." These words he accompanied with a +push of the helm so violent, as almost to throw the man overboard who +sat on the larboard quarter. At the same moment, a heavy sea lifted +the boat, and sent her many yards beyond, and to the right of a +pointed rock, just flush or even with the water, which had escaped our +notice, and which none suspected but the American captain (for these +rocks do not show breakers every minute, if they did they would be +easily avoided). On this we should most certainly have been dashed to +pieces, had not the danger been seen and avoided by the sudden and +skilful motion of the helm; one moment more, and one foot nearer, and +we were gone. + +"Merciful God!" said I, "to what fate am I reserved at last? How can I +be sufficiently thankful for so much goodness?" + +I thanked the American for his attention--told my men how much we were +indebted to him, and how amply he had repaid our kindness in taking +him off the wreck. + +"Ah, lieutenant," said the poor man, "it is a small turn I've done you +for the kindness you have shown to me." + +The water was very deep, the rocks being steep; so, we lowered our +sail, and getting our oars out, pulled in to look for a landing. At +the farther end of the cove, we discovered the wreck of a vessel +lying on the beach. She was broken in two, and appeared to be +copper-bottomed. This increased the eagerness of the men to land; we +rowed close to the shore, but found that the boat would be dashed to +pieces if we attempted it. The midshipman proposed that one of us +should swim on shore, and, by ascending a hill, discover a place to +lay the boat in. This I agreed to; and the quarter-master immediately +threw off his clothes. I made a lead-line fast to him under his arms, +that we might pull him in if we found him exhausted. He went over the +surf with great ease, until he came to the breakers on the beach, +through which he could not force his way; for the moment he touched +the ground with his foot, the recoil of the sea, and what is called by +sailors the undertow, carried him back again, and left him in the rear +of the last wave. + +Three times the brave fellow made the attempt, and with the same +result. At last he sunk, and we pulled him in very nearly dead. We, +however, restored him by care and attention, and he went again to his +usual duty. The midshipman now proposed that he should try to swim +through the surf without the line, for that alone had impeded the +progress of the quarter-master; this was true, but I would not allow +him to run the risk, and we pulled along shore, until we came to +a rock on which the surf beat very high, and which we avoided in +consequence. This rock we discovered to be detached from the main; and +within it, to our great joy, we saw smooth water; we pulled in, and +succeeded in landing without much difficulty, and having secured +our boat to a grapnel, and left two trusty men in charge of her, +I proceeded with the rest to explore the cove; our attention was +naturally first directed to the wreck which we had passed in the boat, +and, after a quarter of an hour's scrambling over huge fragments of +broken rocks, which had been detached from the sides of the hill, and +encumbered the beach, we arrived at the spot. + +The wreck proved to be a beautiful copper-bottomed schooner, of about +a hundred and eighty tons burthen. She had been dashed on shore with +great violence, and thrown many yards above the high-water mark. Her +masts and spars were lying in all directions on the beach, which +was strewed with her cargo. This consisted of a variety of toys +and hardware, musical instruments, violins, flutes, fifes, and +bird-organs. Some few remains of books, which I picked up, were French +romances, with indelicate plates, and still worse text. These proved +the vessel to be French. At a short distance from the wreck, on a +rising knoll, we found three or four huts, rudely constructed out of +the fragments; and, a little farther off, a succession of graves, each +surmounted with a cross. I examined the huts, which contained some +rude and simple relics of human tenancy: a few benches and tables, +composed of boards roughly hewn out and nailed together; bones of +goats, and of the wild hog, with the remains of burnt wood. But we +could not discover any traces of the name of the vessel or owner; nor +were there any names marked or cut on the boards, as might have been +expected, to show to whom the vessel belonged, and what had become of +the survivors. + +This studied concealment of all information led us to the most +accurate knowledge of her port of departure, her destination, and her +object of trade. Being on the south-west side of the island, with her +head lying to the north-east, she had, beyond all doubt, been running +from Rio Janeiro towards the coast of Africa, and got on shore in +the night. That she was going to fetch a cargo of slaves was equally +clear, not only from the baubles with which she was freighted but also +from the interior fitting of the vessel, and from a number of hand and +leg shackles which we found among the wreck, and which we knew were +only used for the purposes of confining and securing the unhappy +victims of this traffic. + +We took up our quarters in the huts for the night, and the next +morning divided ourselves into three parties, to explore the island. I +have before observed that we had muskets, but no powder, and therefore +stood little chance of killing any of the goats or wild hogs, with +which we found the island abounded. One party sought the means of +attaining the highest summit of the island; another went along the +shore to the westward; while myself and two others went to the +eastward. We crossed several ravines, with much difficulty, until we +reached a long valley, which seemed to intersect the island. + +Here a wonderful and most melancholy phenomenon arrested our +attention. Thousands and thousands of trees covered the valley, each +of them about thirty feet high; but every tree was dead, and extended +its leafless boughs to another--a forest of desolation, as if nature +had at some particular moment ceased to vegetate! There was no +underwood or grass. On the lowest of the dead boughs, the gannets, and +other sea birds, had built their nests in numbers unaccountable. Their +tameness, as Cooper says, "was shocking to me." So unaccustomed did +they seem to man, that the mothers, brooding over their young, only +opened their beaks, in a menacing attitude at us, as we passed by +them. + +How to account satisfactorily for the simultaneous destruction of this +vast forest of trees, was very difficult; there was no want of rich +earth for nourishment of the roots. The most probable cause appeared +to me, a sudden and continued eruption of sulphuric effluvia from the +volcano; or else, by some unusually heavy gale of wind or hurricane, +the trees had been drenched with salt water to their roots. One or the +other of these causes must have produced the effect. The philosopher, +or the geologist, must decide. + +We had the consolation to know that we should at least experience no +want of food--the nests of the birds affording us a plentiful supply +of eggs, and young ones of every age; with these we returned loaded +to the cove. The party that had gone to the westward, reported having +seen some wild hogs, but were unable to secure any of them; and those +who had attempted to ascend the mountain, returned much fatigued, and +one of their number missing. They reported that they had gained the +summit of the mountain, where they had discovered a large plain, +skirted by a species of fern tree, from twelve to eighteen feet +high--that on this plain they had seen a herd of goats; and among +them, could distinguish one of enormous size, which appeared to be +their leader. He was as large as a pony; but all attempts to take one +of them were utterly fruitless. The man who was missing had followed +them farther than they had. They waited some time for his return; but +as he did not come to them, they concluded he had taken some other +route to the cove. I did not quite like this story, fearing some +dreadful accident had befallen the poor fellow, for whom we kept a +watch, and had a fire burning the whole night, which, like the former +one, we passed in the huts. We had an abundant supply of fire-wood +from the wreck, and a stream of clear water ran close by our little +village. + +The next morning, a party was sent in search of the man, and some were +sent to fetch a supply of young gannets for our dinner. The latter +brought back with them as many young birds as would suffice for two +or three days; but of the three who went in quest of the missing man, +only two returned. They reported that they could gain no tidings of +him: that they had missed one of their own number, who had, no doubt, +gone in pursuit of his shipmate. + +This intelligence occasioned a great deal of anxiety, and many +surmises. The most prevalent opinion seemed to be that there were wild +beasts on the island, and that our poor friends had become a prey to +them. I determined, the next morning, to go in search of them myself, +taking one or two chosen men with me. I should have mentioned, that +when we left the sinking vessel, we had taken out a poodle dog, that +was on board--first, because I would not allow the poor animal to +perish; and, secondly, because we might, if we had no better food, +make a dinner of him. This was quite fair, as charity begins at home. + +This faithful animal became much attached to me, from whom he +invariably received his portion of food. He never quitted me, nor +followed any one else; and he was my companion when I went on this +excursion. + +We reached the summit of the first mountain, whence we saw the goats +browsing on the second, and meant to go there in pursuit of the +objects of our anxious search. I was some yards in advance of my +companions, and the dog a little distance before me, near the shelving +part of a rock, terminating in a precipice. The shelf I had to cross +was about six or seven feet wide, and ten or twelve long, with a very +little inclined plane towards the precipice, so that I thought it +perfectly safe. A small rill of water trickled down from the rock +above it, and, losing itself among the moss and grass, fell over the +precipice below, which indeed was of a frightful depth. + +This causeway was to all appearance safe, compared with many which +we had passed, and I was just going to step upon it, when my dog ran +before me, jumped on the fatal pass--his feet slipped from under +him--he fell, and disappeared over the precipice! I started back--I +heard a heavy squelch and a howl; another fainter succeeded, and all +was still. I advanced with the utmost caution to the edge of the +precipice, where I discovered that the rill of water had nourished +a short moss, close and smooth as velvet, and so slippery as not +to admit of the lightest footstep; this accounted for the sudden +disappearance, and, as I concluded, the inevitable death of my dog. + +My first thoughts were those of gratitude for my miraculous escape; my +second unwillingly glanced at the fate of my poor men, too probably +lying lifeless at the foot of this mountain. I stated my fears to the +two seamen who were with me, and who had just come up. The whole bore +too much the appearance of truth to admit of a doubt. We descended the +ruins by a circuitous and winding way; and, after an hour's difficult +and dangerous walk, we reached the spot, where all our fears were too +fully confirmed. There lay the two dead bodies of our companions, +and that of my dog, all mangled in a shocking manner; both, it would +appear, had attempted to cross the shelf in the same careless way +which I was about to do, when Providence interposed the dog in my +behalf. + +This singular dispensation was not lost upon me; indeed, latterly, I +had been in such perils, and seen such hair-breadth escapes, that I +became quite an altered and reflecting character. I returned to my +men at the cove, thoughtful and melancholy; I told them of what had +happened; and, having a Prayer-book with me in my trunk, I proposed to +them that I should read the evening prayers, and a thanksgiving for +our deliverance. + +In this, the American captain, whose name was Green, most heartily +concurred. Indeed, ever since this poor man had been received into the +boat, he had been a very different character to what I had at first +supposed him; he constantly refused his allowance of spirits, giving +it among the sailors; he was silent and meditative; I often found him +in prayer, and on these occasions I never interrupted him. At other +times, he studied how he might make himself most useful. He would +patch and mend the people's clothes and shoes, or show them how to +do it for themselves. Whenever any hard work was to be done, he was +always the first to begin, and the last to leave off; and to such a +degree did he carry his attention and kindness, that we all began to +love him, and to treat him with great respect. He took charge of a +watch when we were at sea, and never closed his eyes during his hour +of duty. + +Nor was this the effect of fear, or the dread of ill-usage among so +many Englishmen, whom his errors had led into so much misfortune. He +very soon had an opportunity of proving that his altered conduct was +the effect of sorrow and repentance. The next morning I sent a party +round by the sea-shore, with directions to walk up the valley and +bury the bodies of our unfortunate companions. The two men who had +accompanied me were of the number sent on this service; when they +returned, I pointed out to them how disastrous our residence had been +on this fatal island, and how much better it had been for us if we had +continued our course to Rio Janeiro, which, being only two hundred and +fifty or two hundred and sixty leagues distant, we should by that time +nearly have reached: that we were now expending the most valuable part +of our provisions, namely--our spirits and tobacco; while our boat, +our only hope and resource, was not even in safety, since a gale +of wind might destroy her. I therefore proposed to make immediate +preparations for our departure, to which all unanimously agreed. + +We divided the various occupations; some went to fetch a sea stock +of young birds, which were killed and dressed to save our salt +provisions; others filled all our water-casks. Captain Green +superintended the rigging, sails, and oars of the boat, and saw that +every thing was complete in that department. The spirits remaining +were getting low, and Captain Green, the midshipman, and myself, +agreed to drink none, but reserve it for pressing emergencies. In +three days after beginning our preparations, and the seventh after our +landing, we embarked, and after being nearly swamped by the surf, once +more hoisted our sail on the wide waters of the Atlantic Ocean. + +We were not destined, however, to encounter many dangers this time, or +to reach the coast of South America: for we had not been many hours +at sea, when a vessel hove in sight; she proved to be an American +privateer brig, of fourteen guns and one hundred and thirty men, bound +on a cruise off the Cape of Good Hope. As soon as she perceived us, +she bore down, and in half-an-hour we were safe on board; when having +bundled all our little stock of goods on her decks, the boat was cut +adrift. My men were not well treated until they consented to enter for +the privateer, which, after much persuasion and threats, they all did, +except Thompson, contrary to my strongest remonstrances, and urging +every argument in my power to dissuade them from such a fatal step. + +I remonstrated with the captain of the privateer, on what I deemed a +violation of hospitality. "You found me," I said, "on the wide ocean, +in a frail boat, which some huge wave might have overwhelmed in a +moment, or some fish, in sport, might have tossed in the air. You +received me and my people with all the kindness and friendship which +we could desire; but you mar it, by seducing the men from their +allegiance to their lawful sovereign, inducing them to become rebels, +and subjecting them to a capital punishment whenever they may (as they +most probably will) fall into the hands of their own government." + +The captain, who was an unpolished, but sensible, clearheaded Yankee, +replied that he was sorry I should take any thing ill of him; that no +affront was meant to me; that he had nothing whatever to do with my +men, until they came voluntarily to him, and entered for his vessel; +that he could not but admit, however, that they might have been +persuaded to take this step by some of his own people. "And, now, +Leftenant," said he, "let me ask you a question. Suppose you commanded +a British vessel, and ten or twelve of my men, if I was unlucky enough +to be taken by you, should volunteer for your ship, and say they were +natives of Newcastle, would you refuse them? Besides, before we +went to war with you, you made no ceremony of taking men out of our +merchant-ships, and even out of our ships of war, whenever you had an +opportunity. Now, pray, where is the difference between your conduct +and ours?" + +I replied, that it would not be very easy, nor, if it were, would it +answer any good purpose, for us to discuss a question that had puzzled +the wisest heads, both in his country and mine for the last twenty +years; that my present business was a case of its own, and must be +considered abstractedly; that the fortune of war had thrown me in his +power, and that he made a bad use of the temporary advantage of his +situation, by allowing my men, who, after all, were poor, ignorant +creatures, to be seduced from their duty, to desert their flag, and +commit high treason, by which their lives were forfeited, and their +families rendered miserable; that whatever might have been the conduct +of his government or mine, whatever line pursued by this or that +captain, no precedent could make wrong right; and I left it to himself +(seeing I had no other resource) to say, whether he was doing as he +would be done by?" + +"As for that matter," said the captain, "we privateer's-men don't +trouble our heads much about it; we always take care of Number One; +and if your men choose to say they are natives of Boston, and will +enter for my ship, I must take them. Why," continued he, "there is +your best man, Thompson; I'd lay a demijohn of old Jamaica rum that +he is a true-blooded Yankee, and if he was to speak his mind, would +sooner fight under the stripes than the Union." + +"D----n the dog that says yon of Jock Thompson," replied the Caledonian, +who stood by. "I never deserted my colours yet, and I don't think I +ever shall. There is only one piece of advice I would wish to give to +you and your officers, captain. I am a civil spoken man, and never +injured any soul breathing, except in the way of fair fighting; but if +either you, or any of your crew, offer to bribe me, or in any way to +make me turn my back on my king and country, I'll lay him on his back +as flat as a flounder, if I am able, and if I am not able, I'll try +for it." + +"That's well spoken," said the captain, "and I honour you for it. You +may rely on it that I shall never tempt you, and if any of mine do it, +they must take their chance." + +Captain Green heard all this conversation; he took no part in it, but +walked the deck in his usual pensive manner. When the captain of the +privateer went below to work his reckoning, this unhappy man entered +into conversation with me--he began by remarking-- + +"What a noble specimen of a British sailor you have with you." + +"Yes," I replied, "he is one of the right sort--he comes from the land +where the education of the poor contributes to the security of the +rich; where a man is never thought the worse of for reading his Bible, +and where the generality of the lower orders are brought up in the +honest simplicity of primitive Christians." + +"I guess," said Green, "that you have not many such in your navy." + +"More than you would suppose," I replied; "and what will astonish you +is, that though they are impressed, they seldom, if ever, desert; and +yet they are retained on much lower wages than those they were taken +from, or could obtain; but they have a high sense of moral and +religious feeling, which keeps them to their duty. + +"They must needs be discontented for all that," said Green. + +"Not necessarily so," said I: "they derive many advantages from being +in the navy, which they could not have in other employments. They have +pensions for long services or wounds, are always taken care of in +their old age, and their widows and children have much favour shown +them, by the government, as well as by other public bodies and wealthy +individuals. But we must finish this discussion another time," +continued I, "for I perceive the dinner is going into the cabin." + +I received from the captain of the privateer every mark of respect and +kindness that his means would allow. Much of this I owed to Green, and +the black man Mungo, both of whom had represented my conduct in saving +the life of him who had endangered mine and that of all my party. +Green's gratitude knew no bounds--he watched me night and day, as a +mother would watch a darling child; he anticipated any want or wish I +could have, and was never happy until it was gratified. The seamen on +board the vessel were all equally kind and attentive to me, so highly +did they appreciate the act of saving the life of their countryman, +and exposing my own in quelling a mutiny. + +We cruised to the southward of the Cape, and made one or two captures; +but they were of little consequence. One of them, being a trader from +Mozambique, was destroyed; the other, a slaver from Madagascar, the +captain knew not what to do with. He therefore took out eight or ten +of the stoutest male negroes, to assist in working his vessel, and +then let the prize go. + + + + +Chapter XX + + But who is this? What thing of sea + Comes this way sailing, + Like a stately ship + With all her bravery on, and tackle trim? + + SAMSON AGONISTES. + + +The privateer was called the _True-blooded Yankee_. She was first +bound to the island of Tristan d'Acunha, where she expected to meet +her consort, belonging to the same owners, and who had preceded her +when their directions were to cruise between the Cape and Madagascar, +for certain homeward bound extra Indiamen, one or two of which she +hoped would reward all the trouble and expense of the outfit. + +We reached the island without any material incident. I had observed, +with concern, that the second mate, whose name was Peleg Oswald, was +a sour, ferocious, quarrelsome man; and that although I was kindly +treated by the captain, whose name was Peters, and by the chief mate, +whose name was Methusalem Solomon, I never could conciliate the good +will of Peleg Oswald. + +Green, the captain, who came with me, was, from the time I saved +his life, an altered man. He had been, as I was informed, a drunken +profligate; but from the moment when I received him into my boat, +his manners and habits seemed as completely changed as if he were a +different being. He never drank more than was sufficient to quench his +thirst--he never swore--he never used any offensive language. He read +the Scriptures constantly, was regular in his morning and evening +devotion, and on every occasion of quarrel or ill-will in the brig, +which was perpetually occurring, Green was the umpire and the +peace-maker. He saved the captain and chief mate a world of trouble; +by this system, violent language became uncommon on board, punishment +was very rare, and very mild. The men were happy, and did their duty +with alacrity; and but for Peleg Oswald, all would have been harmony. + +We made the island about the 15th of December, when the weather was +such as the season of the year might induce us to expect, it being +then summer. We hove off to the north or windward side of the island, +about two miles from the shore; we dared not go nearer on that side, +for fear of what are called the "Rollers"--a phenomenon, it would +appear, of terrific magnitude, on that sequestered little spot. On +this extraordinary operation of nature, many conjectures have been +offered, but no good or satisfactory reason has ever been assigned to +satisfy my mind; for the simple reason, that the same causes would +produce the same effect on St Helena, Ascension, or any other island +or promontory exposed to a wide expanse of water. I shall attempt +to describe the scene that a succession of Rollers would present, +supposing, what has indeed happened, that a vessel is caught on the +coast when coming in. + +The water will be perfectly smooth--not a breath of wind--when, +suddenly, from the north, comes rolling a huge wave, with a glassy +surface, never breaking till it meets the resistance of the land, when +it dashes down with a noise and a resistless violence that no art or +effort of man could elude. It is succeeded by others. No anchorage +would hold if there were anchorage to be had; but this is not the +case; the water is from ninety to one hundred fathoms deep, and +consequently an anchor and cable could scarcely afford a momentary +check to any ship when thus assailed; or, if it did, the sea would, by +being resisted, divide, break on board, and swamp her. Such was the +fate of the unfortunate ----, a British sloop of war; which, after +landing the captain and six men, was caught in the rollers, driven on +shore, and every creature on board perished, only the captain and his +boat's crew escaping. This unfortunate little vessel was lost, not +from want of skill or seamanship in the captain or crew, for a finer +set of men never swam salt water; but from their ignorance of this +peculiarity of the island, unknown in any other that I ever heard +of, at least to such an alarming extent. Driven close in to the land +before she could find soundings, at last she let go three anchors; but +nothing could withstand the force of the "Rollers," which drove her in +upon the beach, when she broke in two as soon as she landed, and all +hands perished in sight of the affected captain and his boat's crew, +who buried the bodies of their unfortunate shipmates as soon as the +sea had delivered them up. + +There is another remarkable peculiarity in this island: its shores, to +a very considerable extent out to sea, are surrounded with the plant, +called _fucus maximus_, mentioned by Captain Cook; it grows to the +depth of sixty fathoms, or one hundred and eighty feet, and reaches in +one long stem to the surface, when it continues to run along to the +enormous length of three or four hundred feet, with short alternate +branches at every foot of its length. Thus, in the stormy ocean, grows +a plant, higher and of greater length than any vegetable production of +the surface of the earth, not excepting the banyan tree, which, as its +branches touch the ground, takes fresh root, and may be said to form a +separate tree. These marine plants resist the most powerful attacks +of the mightiest elements combined; the winds and the waves in vain +combine their force against them; uniting their foliage on the bosom +of the waters, they laugh at the hurricane and defy its power. The +leaves are alternate, and when the wind ruffles the water, they flap +over, one after the other, with a mournful sound, doubly mournful +to us from the sad association of ideas, and the loneliness of the +island. The branches or tendrils of these plants are so strong and +buoyant, when several of them happen to unite, that a boat cannot pass +through them; I tried with my feet what pressure they would bear, and +I was convinced that, with a pair of snow shoes, a man might walk over +them. + +Captain Peters kindly invited me to go on shore with him. We landed +with much difficulty, and proceeded to the cottage of a man who had +been left there from choice; he resided with his family: and, in +imitation of another great personage on an island to the northward of +him, styled himself "Emperor." A detachment of British soldiers had +been sent from the Cape of Good Hope to take possession of this spot: +but after a time they were withdrawn. + +His present Imperial Majesty had, at the time of my visit, a black +consort, and many snuff-coloured princes and princesses. He was in +other respects a perfect Robinson Crusoe; he had a few head of cattle, +and some pigs; these latter have greatly multiplied on the island. +Domestic fowls were numerous, and he had a large piece of ground +planted with potatoes, the only place south of the Equator which +produces them in their native perfection; the land is rich and +susceptible of great improvement; and the soil is intersected with +numerous running springs over its surface. But it was impossible to +look on this lonely spot without recalling to mind the beautiful lines +of Cowper-- + + "O Solitude, where are the charms + That sages have seen in thy face?" + +Yet in this wild place, alarms and even rebellion had found their way, +the Emperor had but one subject, and this Caliban had ventured, in +direct violation of an imperial mandate, to kill a fowl for his +dinner. + +"Rebellion," said the enraged emperor, "is the son of witchcraft, and +I am determined to make an example of the offender." + +I became the mediator between these two belligerents. I represented to +his imperial majesty, that, as far as the matter of example went, the +severity would lose its effect; for his children were as yet too young +to be corrupted; and, moreover, as his majesty was so well versed in +scripture, he must know that it was his duty to forgive. "Besides," I +said, "her majesty the queen has a strong arm, and can always +assist in repelling or chastising any future act of aggression or +disobedience." I suspect that the moral code of his majesty was not +unlike my own it yielded to the necessities of the time. He must have +found it particularly inconvenient not to be on speaking terms with +his prime minister and arch chancellor, whom he had banished to +the opposite side of the island on pain of death. The sentence was +originally for six months; but on my intercession the delinquent was +pardoned and restored to favour. I felt much self-complacency when I +reflected on this successful instance of my mediatorial power, which +had perhaps smothered a civil war in its birth. + +The emperor informed me that an American whaler was lying at the east +side of the island, filling with the oil of the walrus, or sea-horse; +that she had been there at an anchor six weeks, and was nearly full. I +asked to be shown the spot where the ---- was wrecked; he took me to +her sad remains. She lay broken in pieces on the rocks; and, not far +from her, was a mound of earth, on which was placed a painted piece of +board by way of a tombstone. The fate of the vessel, together with the +number of sufferers, were marked in rude but concise characters. I +do not exactly remember the words, but in substance it stated, that +underneath lay the remains of one hundred as fine fellows as ever +walked on a plank, and that they had died, like British seamen, doing +their duty to the last. This was a melancholy sight, especially to a +sailor, who knew not how soon the same fate awaited him. + +We rafted off several casks of water during that day, and on the +following we completed our water, and then ran to the east end of +the island to anchor near, and wait for our consort the whaler, the +captain of which had come in his boat to visit us: I conversed with +him, and was struck with one remark which he made. + +"You Englishmen go to work in a queerish kind of way," said he; "you +send a parcel of soldiers to live on an island where none but sailors +can be of use. You listen to all that those red coats tell you; they +never thrive when placed out of musket-shot from a gin-shop: and +because _they_ don't like it, you evacuate the island. A soldier likes +his own comfort, although very apt to destroy that of other folks; and +it a'n't very likely he would go and make a good report of an island +that had neither women nor rum, and where he was no better than a +prisoner. Now, if brother Jonathan had taken this island, I guess he +would a' made it pay for its keep; he would have had two or three +crews of whalers, with their wives and families, and all their little +comforts about them, with a party of good farmers to till the land, +and an officer to command the whole. The island can provide itself, as +you may perceive, and all would have gone on well. It is just as easy +to 'fish' the island from the shore as it is in vessel, and indeed +much easier. Only land your boilers and casks, and a couple of dozen +of good whale-boats, and this island would produce a revenue that +would repay with profit all the money laid out upon it, for the +sea-horses have no other place to go to, either to shed their coats in +the autumn, or bring forth their young in the spring. The fishing and +other duties would be a source of amusement to the sailors, who, if +they chose, might return home occasionally in the vessels that came to +take away the full casks of oil and land the empty ones." + +The captain of the whaler returned to his ship, but, I suppose, forgot +to give our captain very particular directions about the anchorage. We +ran down to the east end of the island, and were just going to bring +up, when, supposing himself too near the whaler, Peters chose to run +a little further. I should have observed, that as we rounded the +north-east point, the breeze freshed, and the squalls came heavy out +of the gullies and deep ravines. We therefore shortened sail, and, +passing very near the whaler, they hailed us; but it blew so fresh +that we did not hear what they said; and, having increased our +distance from the whaler to what was judged proper, let go the anchor. + +Ninety fathoms of cable ran out in a crack, before she turned head +to-wind; and, to our mortification, we found we had passed the bank +upon which the whaler had brought up, and must have dropped our anchor +into a well, for we had nineteen fathoms water under the bows, and +only seven fathoms under the stern. The moon showed her face, just at +this moment, and we had the further satisfaction of perceiving, that +we were within fifty yards of a reef of rocks which lay astern of us, +with their dirty, black heads above water. + +We were very much surprised to find, notwithstanding the depth of +water, that, during the lulls, we rode with a slack cable; but about +two o'clock in the morning the cable parted, being cut by the foul +ground. All sail was made immediately, but the rocks astern were so +close to us, that you might have thrown a biscuit on them, and we +thought the cruise of the _True-blooded Yankee_ was at an end; but it +proved otherwise, for the same cause which produced the slack cable +preserved the vessel. The _fucus maximus_ we found had interposed +between us and destruction; we had let go our anchor in this +sub-marine forest, and had perched, as it were, on the tops of the +trees; and, so thick were the leaves and branches, that they held us +from driving, and prevented our going on shore when the cable had +parted. We dragged slowly through the plants, and were very glad to +see ourselves once more clear of this miserable spot. + + "Better dwell in the midst of alarms, + Than reign in this horrible place." + +But I sincerely wish all manner of success to this little empire, +though I hope my evil stars will never take me to it again. We shaped +our course for the Cape of Good Hope, for Captain Peters would not run +further risk in waiting for the consort privateer. + +Poor Thompson, notwithstanding all my exertions in his favour, was +exposed to much ill-treatment on board the vessel, on account of his +firm and unshaken loyalty. He seldom complained to me, but sometimes +vindicated himself by a gentle hint from one of his ample fists on the +nose or eye of the offender, and here the matter usually ended, for +his character was so simple and inoffensive, that all the best men in +the vessel loved him. One night, a man fell overboard--the weather was +fine, and the brig had but little way; they were lowering down the +jolly-boat from the stern, when one of the hooks by which she hung by +the stern, broke, and four men were precipitated with violence into +the water. Two of them could not swim, and all screamed loudly for +help as soon as they came up from their dive. Thompson, seeing this, +darted from the stern like a Newfoundland dog, swam to the weakest, +supported him to the rudder chains, and, leaving him, went to another, +bringing him to the stern of the vessel, and making a rope fast under +his arms. In this way he succeeded in saving the whole of these poor +fellows. Two of the five would certainly have sank but for his timely +assistance, for they were some time before another boat could be got +ready; and the other three owned that they much doubted whether they +could have reached the vessel without help. + +This conduct of Thompson was much applauded by all on board, and some +asked him why he ventured his life for people who had used him so ill: +he answered, that his mither and his Bible taught him to do all the +good he could: and as God had given him a strong arm, he hoped he +should always use it for the benefit of his brother in need. + +It might have been supposed that an act like this would have prevented +the recurrence of any further insult; but the more the Americans +perceived Thompson's value, the more eager were they to have him as +their own. The second mate, whom I have already described as a rough +and brutal fellow, one day proposed to him to belong to their vessel, +certain, he added, that he would make his fortune by the capture of +two, if not three, extra Indiamen, which they had information of on +their passage. + +Thompson looked the man fully in the face, and said, "Did ye no hear +what I telled the captain the ither day?" + +"Yes," said the man, "I knew that, but that's what we call in our +country 'all my eye.'" + +"But they do not call it so in my country," said the Caledonian, at +the same time planting his fist so full and plump in the left eye of +the mate, that he fell like the "_humi bos_," covering a very large +part of the deck with his huge carcase. + +The man got up, found his face bleeding plentifully, and his eye +closed; but instead of resenting the insult himself, went off and +complained to the captain. Many of the Americans, either from hatred +or jealousy, went along with him, and clamorously demanded that the +Englishman should be punished for striking an officer. When the story, +however, came to be fairly explained, the captain said he was bound +to confess that the second mate was the aggressor, inasmuch as he had +acknowledged that he knew the penalty of the transgression before he +committed the act; that he (the captain) had told Thompson, when +he made the declaration, that he thought him perfectly right, and, +consequently, he was bound to protect him by every law of hospitality +as well as gratitude, after his services in saving the lives of their +countrymen. + +This did not satisfy the crew; they were clamorous for punishment, and +a mutiny was actually headed by the second mate. There was, however, +a large party on board who were in no humour to see an Englishman +treated with such indignity. Of what country they were may readily be +conjectured. The dispute ran high; and I began to think that serious +consequences might ensue, for it had continued from the serving of +grog at twelve o'clock till near two; when casting my eyes over the +larboard quarter, I perceived a sail, and told the captain of it; +he instantly hailed the look-out-man at the mast head; but the +look-out-man had been so much interested with what was going on upon +deck, that he had come down into the main top to listen. + +"Don't you see that sail on the larboard quarter?" said the captain. + +"Yes, Sir," said the man. + +"And why did you not report her?" + +The man could make no reply to this question, for a very obvious +reason. + +"Come down here," said the captain; "let him be released, Solomon; we +will show you a little Yankee discipline." + +But before we proceed to the investigation of the crime, or the +infliction of punishment, we must turn our eyes to the great object +which rose clearer and clearer every five minutes above the horizon. +The privateer was at this time under top sails, and top-gallant-sails, +jib, and foresail, running to the north-east, with a fine breeze and +smooth water. + +"Leftenant," said the captain, "what do you think of her?" + +"I think," said I, "that she is an extra Indiaman, and if you mean +to speak her, you had better put your head towards her under an easy +sail; by which means you will be so near by sunset, that if she runs +from you, you will be able, with your superior sailing, to keep sight +of her all night." + +"I guess you are not far wrong in that," said the captain. + +"I guess he is directly in the face of the truth," said the chief +mate, who had just returned from the main top, where he had spent the +last quarter of an hour in the most intense and absorbed attention to +the cut of the stranger's sails. "If e'er I saw wood and canvas put +together before in the shape of a ship, that there is one of John +Bull's bellowing calves of the ocean, and not less than a forty-four +gunner." + +"What say you to that, leftenant?" said the captain. + +"Oh, as to that," said the mate, "it isn't very likely that he's going +to tell us the truth." + +"Because you would not have done it yourself in the same situation," +said I. + +"Just so," said the mate. + +And in fact, I must own that I had no particular wish to cruise for +some months in this vessel, and go back for water at Tristan d'Acunha +I therefore did not use my very best optical skill when I gave my +opinion; but as I saw the stranger was nearing us very fast, although +we were steering the same way, I made my mind up that I should very +soon be out of this vessel, and on my way to England, where all my +happiness and prospects were centred. + +The chief mate took one more look--the captain followed his example; +they then looked at each other, and pronounced their cruise at an end. + +"We are done, sir," said the mate; "and all owing to that d----d +English renegado that you would enter on the books as one of the +ship's company. But let's have him aft, and give him his discharge +regularly." + +"First of all," said the captain, "suppose we try what is to be +done with our heels. They used to be good, and I never saw the +brass-bottomed sarpent that could come anear us yet. Send the royal +yards up--clear away the studding-sails--keep her with the wind just +two points abaft the beam, that's her favourite position; and I think +we may give the slip to that old-country devil in the course of the +night." + +I said nothing, but looked very attentively to all that was doing. The +vessel was well manned, certainly, and all sail was set upon her in a +very expeditious manner. + +"Heave the log," said the captain. + +They did so; and she was going, by their measurement, nine and six. + +"What do you think your ship is doing?" said the captain to me. + +"I think," said I, "she is going about eleven knots; and, as she is +six miles astern of you, that she will be within gunshot in less than +four hours." + +"Part of that time shall be spent in paying our debts for this +favour," said the captain. "Mr Solomon, let them seize that +_no-nation_ rascal up to the main rigging, and hand up two of your +most hungry cats. Where is Dick Twist, he that was boatswain's mate of +the _Statira_; and that red-haired fellow, you know, that swam away +from the Maidstone in the _Rappahanock?_" + +"You mean carroty Sam, I guess--pass the word for Sam Gall." + +The two operators soon appeared, each armed with the instruments of +his office; and I must say that, in malignity of construction, they +were equal to any thing used on similar occasions even by Captain +G----. The culprit was now brought forward, and to my surprise it was +the very man whom Thompson, when in the boat, had thrown overboard for +mutiny. I cannot say that I felt sorry for the cause or the effect +that was likely to be produced by the disputes of the day. + +"Seize him up," said the captain; "you were sent to the mast-head in +your regular turn of duty; and you have neglected that duty, by which +means we are likely to be taken: so, before my authority ceases, I +will show you a Yankee trick." + +"I am an Englishman," said the man, "and appeal to my officer for +protection." + +The captain looked at me. + +"If I am the officer you appeal to," said I, "I do not acknowledge +you; you threw off your allegiance when you thought it suited your +purpose, and you now wish to resume it to screen yourself from a +punishment which you richly deserve. I shall certainly not interfere +in your favour." + +"I was born," roared the cockney, "in Earl Street, Seven Dials--my +mother keeps a tripe-shop--I am a true born Briton, and you have no +right to flog me." + +"You was a Yankee sailor from New London yesterday, and you are a +tripe-seller, from Old London to-day. I think I am right in calling +you a no-nation rascal, but we will talk about the right another +time," said the captain; "meanwhile, Dick Twist, do you begin." + +Twist obeyed his orders with skill and accuracy; and having given the +prisoner three dozen, that would not have disgraced the leger-de-main +of my friend the Farnese Hercules in the brig, Sam Gall was desired +to take his turn. Sam acquitted himself _à merveille_ with the like +number; and the prisoner, after a due proportion of bellowing, was +cast loose. I could not help reflecting how very justly this captain +had got his vessel into jeopardy by first allowing a man to be seduced +from his allegiance, and then placing confidence in him. + +"Let us now take a look at the chase," said the captain; "zounds, she +draws up with us. I can see her bowsprit-cap when she lifts; and half +an hour ago I only saw her foreyard. Cut away the jolly-boat from the +stern, Solomon." + +The chief mate took a small axe, and, with a steady blow at the end of +each davit, divided the falls, and the boat fell into the sea. + +"Throw these here two aftermost guns overboard," said the captain; "I +guess we are too deep abaft, and they would not be of much use to us +in the way of defence, for this is a wapper that's after us." + +The guns in a few minutes were sent to their last rest; and for the +next half-hour the enemy gained less upon them. It was now about +half-past three P.M.; the courage of the Yankees revived; and the +second mate reminded the captain that his black eye had not been +reckoned for at the main rigging. + +"Nor shall it be," said the captain, "while I command the +_True-blooded Yankee_; what is, is right; no man shall be punished for +fair defence after warning. Thompson, come and stand aft." + +The man was in the act of obeying this order, when he was seized on +by some six or eight of the most turbulent, who began to tear off his +jacket. + +"Avast there, shipmates!" said Twist and Gall, both in a breath. "We +don't mind touching up such a chap as this here tripeman; but not the +scratch of a pin does Thompson get in this vessel. He is one of us; he +is a seamen every inch of him, and you must flog us, and some fifty +more, if once you begin; for d----n my eyes if we don't heave the log +with the second mate, and then lay-to till the frigate comes along +side." + +The mutineers stood aghast for a few seconds; but the second mate, +jumping on a gun, called out, + +"Who's of our side? Are we going to be bullied by these d----d +Britishers?" + +"You are," said I, "if doing an act of justice is bullying. You are in +great danger, and I warn you of it. I perceive the force of those whom +you pretend to call Americans; and though I am the last man in the +world to sanction an act of treachery by heaving the ship to, yet I +caution you to beware how you provoke the bull-dog, who has only broke +his master's chain 'for a lark,' and is ready to return to him. I +am your guest, and therefore your faithful friend; use your utmost +endeavours to escape from your enemy. I know what she is, for I know +her well; and, if I am not much mistaken, you have scarcely more time, +with all your exertions, than to pack up your things; for be assured, +you will not pass twelve hours more under your own flag." + +This address had a tranquillising effect. The captain, Captain Green, +and Solomon, walked aft; and, to their great dismay, saw distinctly +the water line of the pursuing frigate. + +"What can be done?" said the captain; "she has gained on us in this +manner, while the people were all aft settling that infernal dispute. +Throw two more of the after guns overboard." + +This order was obeyed with the same celerity as the former, but not +with the same success. The captain now began to perceive, what was +pretty obvious to me before, namely, that by dropping the boat from +the extreme end of the vessel, where it hung like the pea on the +steelyard, he did good; the lightening her also of the two aftermost +guns, hanging over the dead wood of the vessel, were in like manner +serviceable. But here he should have stopped; the effect of throwing +the next two guns overboard was pernicious. The vessel fell by the +head; her stern was out of the water; she steered wild, yawed, and +decreased in her rate of sailing in a surprising manner. + +"Cut away the bower anchors," said the captain. + +The stoppers were cut, and the anchors dropped; the brig immediately +recovered herself from her oppression, as it were, and resumed +her former velocity; but the enemy had by this time made fearful +approaches. The only hope of the captain and his crew was in the +darkness; and as this darkness came on, my spirits decreased, for I +greatly feared that we should have escaped. The sun had sunk some time +below the horizon; the cloud of sail coming up astern of us began to +be indistinct, and at last disappeared altogether in a black squall: +we saw no more of her for nearly two hours. + +I walked the deck with Green and the captain. The latter seemed in +great perturbation; he had hoped to make his fortune, and retire from +the toils and cares of a sea-life in some snug corner of the Western +settlements, where he might cultivate a little farm, and lead the life +of an honest man; "for _this_ life," said he, "I am free to confess, +is, after all, little better than highway robbery." + +Whether the moral essay of the captain was the effect of his present +danger, I will not pretend to say. I only know, that if the reader +will turn back to some parts of my history, he will find me very often +in a similar mood, on similar occasions. + +The two captains and the chief mate now retired, after leaving me +meditating by myself over the larboard gunwale, just before the main +rigging. The consultation seemed to be of great moment; and, as I +afterwards learned, was to decide what course they should steer, +seeing that they evidently lost sight of their pursuer. I felt all my +hopes of release vanish as I looked at them, and had made up my mind +to go to New York. + +At this moment, a man came behind me, as if to get a pull at the +top-gallant sheets; and while he hung down upon it with a kind of +"yeo-ho," he whispered in my ear--"You may have the command of the +brig if you like. We are fifty-Englishmen--we will heave her to and +hoist a light, if you will only say the word, and promise us our free +pardon." + +I pretended at first not to hear, but, turning round, I saw Mr Twist. + +"Hold, villain!" said I; "do you think to redeem one act of treachery +by another? and do you dare to insult the honour of a naval officer +with a proposal so infamous? Go to your station instantly, and think +yourself fortunate that I do not denounce you to the captain, who has +a perfect right to throw you overboard--a fate which your chain of +crimes fully deserves." + +The man skulked away, and I went off to the captain, to whom I related +the circumstance, desiring him to be on his guard against treachery. + +"Your conduct, Sir," said the captain, "is what I should have +expected from a British naval officer; and since you have behaved so +honourably, I will freely tell you that my intention is to shorten +sail to the topsails and foresail, and haul dead on a wind into that +dark squall to the southward." + +"As you please," said I; "you cannot expect that I should advise, nor +would you believe me if I said I wished you success; but rely on it +I will resist, by every means in my power, any unfair means to +dispossess you of your command." + +"I thank you, Sir," said the captain, mournfully; and, without losing +any more time in useless words, "Shorten sail there," continued +he, with a low but firm voice; "take in the lower and topmost +studding-sail--hands aloft--in top-gallant studding-sails, and roll up +the top-gallant sails." + +All this appeared to be done with surprising speed, even to me who +had been accustomed to very well conducted ships of war. One mistake, +however, was made; the lower studding-sail, instead of being hauled +in on deck, was let to fall overboard, and towed some time under the +larboard bow before it was reported to the officers. + +"Haul in the larboard braces--brace sharp up--port the helm, and bring +her to the wind, quarter-master." + +"Port, it is, Sir," said the man at the helm, and the vessel was close +hauled upon the starboard tack; but she did not seem to move very +fast, although, she had a square mainsail, boom mainsail, and jib. + +"I think we have done them at last," said the captain; "what do you +think, leftenant?" giving me a hearty but very friendly slap on the +back. "Come, what say you; shall we take a cool bottle of London +particular after the fatigues of the day?" + +"Wait a little," said I, "wait a little." + +"What are you looking at there to windward?" said the captain, who +perceived that my eye was fixed on a particular point. + +Before I had time to answer, Thompson came up to me and said, "there +is the ship, Sir," pointing to the very spot on which I was gazing. +The captain heard this; and, as fear is ever quick-sighted, he +instantly caught the object. + +"Running is of no use now," said he; "we have tried her off the wind, +our best going; she beats us at that; and on a wind, I don't think so +much of her; but still, with this smooth water and fine breeze, she +ought to move better. Solomon, there is something wrong, give a look +all round." + +Solomon went forward on the starboard side, but saw nothing. As he +looked over the gangway and bow, coming round on the lee side of +the forecastle, he saw some canvas hanging on one of the +night-heads--"What have we here?" said he. No one answered. He looked +over the fore chains, and found the whole lower studding-sail towing +in the water. + +"No wonder she don't move," said the mate; "here is enough to stop the +Constitution herself. Who took in this here lower studding-sail?--But, +never mind, we'll settle that to-morrow. Come over here, you +forecastle men." + +Some of the Americans came over to him, but not with very great +alacrity. The sail could not be pulled in, as the vessel had too much +way; and while they were ineffectually employed about it, the flash of +a gun was seen to windward; and as the report reached our ears, the +shot whistled over our heads, and darted like lightning through the +boom mainsail. + +"Hurra for old England," said Thompson; "the fellow that fired that +shot shall drink my allowance of grog to-morrow." + +"Hold your tongue, you d----d English rascal," said the second mate, +"or I'll stop your grog for ever." + +"I don't think you will," said the North Briton, "and if you take a +friend's advice, you won't try." Thompson was standing on the little +round-house or poop; the indignant mate jumped up, and collared him. +Thompson disengaged him in the twinkling of an eye, and with one blow +of his right hand in the pit of the man's stomach, sent him reeling +over to leeward. He fell--caught at the boom-sheet--missed it, and +tumbled into the sea, from whence he rose no more. + +All was now confusion. "A man overboard!"--another shot from the +frigate--another and another in quick succession. The fate of the +man was forgotten in the general panic. One shot cut the aftermost +main-shroud; another went through the boat on the booms. The frigate +was evidently very near us. The men all rushed down to seize their +bags and chests; the captain took me by the hand, and said "Sir, I +surrender myself to you, and give you leave now to act as you think +proper." + +"Thompson," said I, "let go the main-sheet, and the main-brace." +Running forward myself, I let go the main-tack, and bowlines; the +main-yard came square of itself. Thompson got a lantern, which he held +up on the starboard quarter. + +The frigate passed close under the stern, shewing a beautiful pale +side, with a fine tier of guns; and, hailing us, desired to know what +vessel it was. + +I replied, that it was the _True-blooded Yankee_ of Boston--that she +had hove-to and surrendered. + + + + +Chapter XXI + + "It is not," says Blake, "the business of a seaman to mind state + affairs, but to hinder foreigners from fooling us."--DR JOHNSON'S + _Life of Blake_. + + +The frigate came to the wind close under our lee, and a boat from her +was alongside in a very few minutes. The officer who came to take +possession, leaped up the side, and was on the deck in a moment. I +received him, told him in few words what the vessel was, introducing +the captain and Green, both of whom I recommended to his particular +notice and attention for the kindness they had shown to me, I then +requested he would walk down into the cabin, leaving a midshipman whom +he brought with him in charge of the deck, and who, in the meanwhile, +he directed to haul the mainsail up, and make the vessel snug. The +prisoners were desired to pack up their things, and be ready to quit +in one hour. + +When lights were brought in the cabin, the lieutenant and myself +instantly recognised each other. + +"Bless my soul, Frank," said he, "what brought you here?" + +"That," said I, "is rather a longer story than could be conveniently +told before to-morrow; but may I ask what ship has taken the Yankee? I +conclude it is the _R_----; and what rank does friend Talbot hold in +her?" + +"The frigate," said he, "_is_ the _R_----, as you conjectured. We are +on the Cape station. I am first of her, and sent out here on promotion +for the affair of Basque Roads." + +"Hard, indeed," said I, "that you should have waited so long for what +you so nobly earned; but come, we have much to do. Let us look to +the prisoners, and if you will return on board, taking with you the +captain, mate, and a few of the hands, whom I will select, as the most +troublesome, and the most careless, I will do all I can to have the +prize ready for making sail by daylight, when, if Captain T---- will +give me leave, I will wait on him." + +This was agreed to. The people whom I pointed out, were put into the +boat, four of whose crew came aboard the brig to assist me. We +soon arranged every thing, so as to be ready for whatever might be +required. A boat returned with a fresh supply of hands, taking back +about twenty more prisoners; and the midshipman, who brought them, +delivered also a civil message from the captain, to say, he was glad +to have the prize in such good hands, and would expect me to breakfast +with him at eight o'clock; in the meantime, he desired, that as soon +as I was ready to make sail, I should signify the same by showing two +lights at the same height in the main rigging, and that we should then +keep on a wind to the northward under a plain sail. + +This was completed by four A.M., when we made the signal, and kept on +the weather quarter of the frigate. I took a couple of hours' sleep, +was called at six, dressed myself, and prepared to go on board at half +past seven. I heard her drum and fife beat to quarters, the sweetest +music next to the heavenly voice of Emily, I had ever heard. The tears +rolled down my cheeks with gratitude to God, for once more placing me +under the protection of my beloved flag. The frigate hove-to; soon +after, the gig was lowered down, and came to fetch me; a clean white +cloak was spread in the stern sheets: the men were dressed in white +frocks and trousers, as clean as hands could make them, with neat +straw hats, and canvas shoes. I was seated in the boat without delay, +and my heart beat with rapture when the boatswain's mate at the +gangway piped the side for me. + +I was received by the captain and officers with all the kindness and +affection which we lavish on each other on such occasions. The captain +asked me a thousand questions, and the lieutenants and midshipmen all +crowded round me to hear my answers. The ship's company were also +curious to know our history, and I requested the captain would send +the gig back for Thompson, who would assist me in gratifying the +general curiosity. This was done, and the brave, honest fellow came on +board. The first question he asked was, "Who fired the first shot at +the prize?" + +"It was Mr Spears, the first lieutenant of marines," said one of the +men. + +"Then Mr Spears must have my allowance of grog for the day," said +Thompson; "for I said it last night, and I never go from my word." + +"That I am ready to swear to," said Captain Peters, of the privateer: +"I have known men of good resolutions, and you are one of them; and +I have known men of bad resolutions, and he was one of them whom you +sent last night to his long account; and it was fortunate for you +that you did; for as sure as you now stand here, that man would have +compassed your death, either by dagger, by water, or by poison. I +never knew or heard of the man who had struck or injured Peleg Oswald +with impunity. He was a Kentucky man, of the Ohio, where he had +'squatted,' as we say; but he shot two men with his rifle, because +they had declined exchanging some land with him. He had gouged the eye +out of a third, for some trifling difference of opinion. These acts +obliged him to quit the country; for, not only were the officers of +justice in pursuit of him, but the man who had lost one eye kept a +sharp look out with the other, and Peleg would certainly have had a +rifle ball in his ear if he had not fled eastward, and taken again to +the sea, to which he was originally brought up. I did not know all his +history till long after he and I became shipmates. He would have been +tried for his life; but having made some prize money, he contrived to +buy off his prosecutors. I should have unshipped him next cruise, if +it had pleased God I had got safe back." + +While Peters was giving this little history of his departed mate, the +captain's breakfast was announced, and the two American captains +were invited to partake of it. As we went down the ladder under +the half-deck, Peters and Green could not help casting an eye of +admiration at the clean and clear deck, the style of the guns, and +perfect union of the useful and ornamental, so inimitably blended as +they are sometimes found in our ships of war. There was nothing in +the captain's repast beyond cleanliness, plenty, hearty welcome, and +cheerfulness. + +The conversation turned on the nature, quality, and number of men in +the privateer. "They are all seamen," said Peters, "except the ten +black fellows." + +"Some of them, I suspect, are English," said I. + +"It is not for me to peach," said the wary American. "It is difficult +always to know whether a man who has been much in both countries is +a native of Boston in Lincolnshire, or Boston in Massachusetts; and +perhaps they don't always know themselves. We never ask questions when +a seaman ships for us." + +"You have an abundance of our seamen, both in your marine and merchant +service," said our captain. + +"Yes," said Green; "and we are never likely to want them, while you +impress for us." + +"_We_ impress for you?" said Captain T----, "how do you prove that?" + +"Your impressment," said the American, "fills our ships. Your seamen +will not stand it; and for every two men you take by force, rely on +it, we get one of them as a volunteer." + +Peters dissented violently from this proposition, and appeared angry +with Green for making the assertion. + +"I see no reason to doubt it," said Green; "I know how our fighting +ships, as well as our traders, are manned. I will take my oath that +more than two-thirds have run from the British navy, because they were +impressed. You yourself have said so in my hearing, Peters--look at +your crew." + +Peters could stand conviction no longer; he burst into the most +violent rage with Green; said that what ought never to have been owned +to a British officer, he had let out; that it was true that America +looked upon our system of impressment as the sheet-anchor of her navy; +but he was sorry the important secret should ever have escaped from an +American. + +"For my part," resumed Green, "I feel so deeply indebted to this +gallant young Englishman for his kindness to me, that I am for ever +the friend of himself and his country, and have sworn never to carry +arms against Great Britain, unless to repel an invasion of my own +country." + +Breakfast ended, we all went on deck; the ship and her prize were +lying to; the hands were turned up; all the boats hoisted out; the +prisoners and their luggage taken out of the prize, and, as the +crew of the privateer came on board, they were all drawn up on the +quarter-deck, and many of them known and proved to be Englishmen. +When taxed and reproached for their infamous conduct, they said it +was owing to them that the privateer had been taken, for that they had +left the lower studding-sail purposely hanging over the night-head, +and towing in the water, by which the way of the vessel had been +impeded. + +Captain Peters, who heard this confession, was astonished; and the +captain of the frigate observed to him, that such conduct was exactly +that which might be expected from any traitor to his country. Then, +turning to the prisoners, he said, "the infamy of your first crime +could scarcely have been increased; but your treachery to the new +government, under which you had placed yourselves, renders you +unworthy of the name of men; nor have you even the miserable merit you +claim of having contributed to the capture, since we never lost sight +of the chase from the first moment we saw her, and from the instant +she hauled her wind, we knew she was ours." + +The men hung down their heads, and when dismissed to go below, none of +the crew of the frigate would receive them into their messes; but the +real Americans were kindly treated. + +We shaped our course for Simon's Bay, where we arrived in one week +after the capture. + +The admiral on the station refused to try the prisoners by a +court-martial; he said it was rather a state question, and should send +them all to England, where the lords of the admiralty might dispose of +them as they thought proper. + +The _True-blooded Yankee_ was libelled in the vice admiralty court +at Cape Town, condemned as a lawful prize, and purchased into the +service; and, being a very fine vessel of her class, the admiral was +pleased to say, that as I had been so singularly unfortunate, he would +give me the command of her as a lieutenant, and send me to England +with some despatches, which had been waiting an opportunity. + +This was an arrangement far more advantageous to me than I could have +expected; but what rendered it still more agreeable was, that my +friend Talbot, who was the first to shake me by the hand on board the +prize, begged a passage home with me, he having, by the last packet, +received his commander's commission. The admiral, at my request, also +gave Captains Peters and Green permission to go home with me. Mungo, +the black man, and Thompson, the quarter-master, with the midshipman +who had been with me in the boat, were also of the party. My crew was +none of the very best, as might be supposed; but I was not in a state +to make difficulties; and, with half-a-dozen of the new Negroes, taken +out of the trader, I made up such a ship's company as I thought would +enable me to run to Spithead. + +We laid in a good stock provisions at the Cape. The Americans begged +to be allowed to pay their part; but this I positively refused, +declaring myself too happy in having them as my guests. I purchased +all Captain Peters's wine and stock, giving him the full value for it. +Mungo was appointed steward, for I had taken a great fancy to him; +and my friend Talbot having brought all his things on board, and the +admiral having given my final orders, I sailed from Simon's Bay for +England. + +There is usually but little of incident in a run home of this sort. +I was not directed to stop at St Helena, and had no inclination to +loiter on my way. I carried sail night and day to the very utmost. +Talbot and myself became inseparable friends, and our cabin mess was +one of perfect harmony. We avoided all national reflections, and +abstained as much as possible from politics. I made a confidant of +Talbot in my love affair with Emily. Of poor Eugenia, I had long +before told him a great deal. + +One day at dinner we happened to talk of swimming. "I think," said +Talbot, "that my friend Frank is as good a hand at that as any of us. +Do you remember when you swam away from the frigate at Spithead, to +pay a visit to your friend, Mrs Melpomene, at Point?" + +"I do," said I, "and also how generously you showered the musket-balls +about my ears for the same." + +"Your escape from either drowning or shooting on that occasion, among +many others," said the commander, "makes me augur something more +serious of your future destiny." + +"That may be," said I; "but I dispute the legality of your act, in +trying to kill me before you knew who I was, or what I was about. I +might have been mad, for what you knew; or I might have belonged to +some other ship; but, in any event, had you killed me, and had my body +been found, a coroner's inquest would have gone very hard with you, +and a jury still worse." + +"I should have laughed at them," said Talbot. + +"You might have found it no laughing matter," said I. + +"How?" replied Talbot, "what are sentinels placed for, and loaded with +ball?" + +"To defend the ship," said I; "to give warning of approaching danger; +to prevent men going out of the ship without leave; but never to take +away the life of a man unless in defence of their own, or when the +safety of the king's ship demands it." + +"I deny your conclusion," said Talbot; "the articles of war denounce +death to all deserters." + +"True," said I, "they do, and also to many other crimes; but those +crimes must first of all be proved before a court-martial. Now you +cannot prove that I was deserting, and if you could, you had not the +power to inflict death on me unless I was going towards the enemy. +I own I was disobeying your orders, but even that would not have +subjected me to more than a slight punishment, while your arbitrary +act would have deprived the king, as I flatter myself, of a loyal, +and not a useless subject; and if my body had not been found, no good +could have accrued to the service from the severity of example. On the +contrary, many would have supposed I had escaped, and been encouraged +to make the same attempt." + +"I am very sorry now," said Talbot, "that I did not lower down a boat +to send after you; however, it has been a comfort to me since to +reflect that the marines missed you." + +This ended the subject: we walked the deck a little, talked of +sweethearts, shaped the course for the night to make Fayal, which we +were not far from, and then returned to our beds. + +Falling into a sound sleep, it was natural that the conversation of +the evening should have dwelt on my mind, and a strange mixture of +disjointed thoughts, a compound of reason and insanity, haunted me +till the morning. Trinidad and Emily, the Nine-Pin Rock, and the +mysterious Eugenia, with her supposed son; the sinking wreck, and the +broken schooner, all appeared separately or together. + + "When nature rests, + Oft, in her absence, mimic fancy wakes." + +I thought I saw Emily standing on the pinnacle of the Nine-Pin Rock, +just as Lord Nelson is represented on the monument in Dublin, or +Bonaparte in that of the Place Vendome; but with a grace as far +superior to either, as the Nine-Pin Rock is in majesty and natural +grandeur to those works of human art. + +Emily, I thought, was clad in complete mourning, but looking radiant +in health and loveliness, although with a melancholy countenance. The +dear image of my mistress seemed to say, "I shall never come down from +this pinnacle without your assistance." "Then," thinks I, "you will +never come down at all." Then I thought Eugenia was queen of Trinidad, +and that it was she who had placed Emily out of my reach on the rock; +and I was entreating her to let Emily come down, when Thompson tapped +at my cabin door, and told me that it was daylight, and that they +could see the island of Fayal in the north-east, distant about seven +leagues. + +I dressed myself, and went on deck, saw the land, and a strange sail +steering to the westward. The confounded dream still running in my +head--like Adam, I "liked it not," and yet I thought myself a fool +for not dismissing such idle stuff; still it would not go away. The +Americans came on deck soon after; and seeing the ship steering to the +westward, asked if I meant to speak her. I replied in the affirmative. +We had then as much sail as we could carry; and as she had no wish to +avoid us, but kept on her course, we were soon alongside of her. She +proved to be a cartel, bound to New York with American prisoners. + +In case of meeting with any vessel bound to the United States, the +admiral had given me permission to send my prisoners home without +carrying them to England. I had not mentioned this either to Peters or +Green, for fear of producing disappointment; but when I found I could +dispose of them so comfortably, I acquainted them with my intention. +Their joy and gratitude were beyond all description; they thanked me a +thousand times, as they did my friend Talbot for our kindness to them. + +"Leftenant," said Peters, "I am not much accustomed to the company of +you Englishmen; and if I have always thought you a set of tyrants and +bullies, it arn't my fault. I believed what I was told; but now I +have seen for myself, and I find the devil is never so black as he is +painted." I bowed to the Yankee compliment. "Howsoever," he continued, +"I should like to have a sprinkling of shot between us on fair terms. +Do you bring this here brig to our waters; I hope to get another just +like her, and as I know you are a d----d good fellow, and would as +soon have a dust as sit down to dinner, I should like to try to get +the command of the _True-blooded Yankee_ again." + +"If you man your next brig, as you manned the last, with all your best +hands Englishmen," said I, "I fear I should find it no easy matter to +defend myself." + +"That's as it may be," said the captain; "no man fights better than he +with a halter round his neck: and remember what neighbour Green has +said, for he has 'let the cat out of the bag:' we should have no +Englishmen in our service, if they had not been pressed into yours." + +I could make no return to this salute, because, like the gunner at +Landguard Fort, I had no powder, and, in fact, I felt the rebuke. + +Green stood by, but never opened his lips until the captain had +finished; then holding out his hand to me, with his eyes full of +tears, and his voice almost choked, "Farewell, my excellent friend," +said he; "I shall never forget you; you found me a villain, and, by +the blessing of God, you have made me an honest man. Never, never, +shall I forget the day when, at the risk of your own life, you came +to save one so unworthy of your protection; but God bless you! and if +ever the fortune of war should send you a prisoner to my country, here +is my address--what is mine is yours, and so you shall find." + +The man who had mutinied in the boat, and afterwards entered on board +the privateer, who was sent home with me to take his trial, held out +his hand to Captain Green, as he passed him, to wish him good-by, but +he turned away, saying, "A traitor to his country is a traitor to his +God. I forgive you for the injury you intended to do me, and the more +so, as I feel I brought it on myself; but I cannot degrade myself by +offering you the hand of fellowship." + +So saying, he followed Captain Peters into the boat. I accompanied +them to the cartel, where, having satisfied myself that they had every +comfort, I left them. Green was so overcome that he could not speak, +and poor Mungo could only say, "Good-by, massa leptenant, me tinkee +you berry good man." + +I returned to my own vessel, and made sail for England: once more we +greeted the white cliffs of Albion, so dear to every true English +bosom. No one but he who has been an exile from its beloved shores can +fully appreciate the thrill of joy on such an occasion. We ran through +the Needles, and I anchored at Spithead, after an absence of fourteen +months. I waited on the admiral, showed him my orders, and reported +the prisoners, whom he desired me to discharge into the flag ship; +"and now," said he, "after your extraordinary escape, I will give you +leave to run up to town and see your family, to whom you are no doubt +an object of great interest." + +Here a short digression is necessary. + + + + +Chapter XXII + + Such was my brother too, + So went he suited to his watery tomb: + If spirits can assume both form and suit, + You come to fright us. + + _Twelfth Night_. + + +Soon after the frigate which had taken me off from New Providence had +parted company with the American prize that I was sent on board of, +the crew of the former, it appeared, had been boasting among the +American prisoners of the prize-money they should receive. + +"Not you," said the Yankees; "you will never see your prize any more, +nor any one that went in her." + +These words were repeated to the captain of the frigate, when he +questioned the mate and the crew, and the whole nefarious transaction +came out. They said the ship was sinking when they left her, and that +was the reason they had hurried into the boat. The mate said it was +impossible to get at the leaks, which were in the fore peak, and under +the cabin deck in the run; that he wondered Captain Green had not +made it known, but he supposed he must have been drunk: "the ship," +continued the mate, "must have gone down in twelve hours after we left +her." + +This was reported to the Admiralty by my captain, and my poor father +was formally acquainted with the fatal story. Five months had elapsed +since I was last heard of, and all hopes of my safety had vanished: +this was the reason that when I knocked at the door, I found the +servant in mourning: he was one who had been hired since my departure, +and did not know me. Of course he expressed no surprise at seeing me. + +"Good Heavens!" said I, "who is dead?" "My master's only son, Sir," +said the man, "Mr Frank, drowned at sea." + +"Oh! is that all?" said I, "I am glad it's no worse." The man +concluded that I was an unfeeling brute, and stared stupidly at me as +I brushed by him and ran up stairs to the drawing-room. I ought to +have been more guarded; but, as usual, I followed the impulse of my +feelings. I opened the door, when I saw my sister sitting at a table +in deep mourning, with another young lady whose back was turned +towards me. My sister screamed as soon as she saw me. The other lady +turned round, and I beheld my Emily, my dear, dear Emily: she too was +in deep mourning. My sister, after screaming, fell on the floor in a +swoon. Emily instantly followed her example, and there they both lay, +like two petrified queens in Westminster Abbey. It was a beautiful +sight, "pretty, though a plague." + +I was confoundedly frightened myself, and thought I had done a +very foolish thing; but as I had no time to lose, I rang the bell +furiously, and seeing some jars with fresh flowers in them, I caught +them up and poured plentiful libations over the faces and necks of +the young ladies; but Emily came in for much the largest share, which +proves that I had neither lost my presence of mind nor my love for +her. + +My sister's maid, Higgins, was the first to answer the drawing-room +bell, which, from its violent ringing, announced some serious event. +She came bouncing into the room like a _recouchée_ shot. She was an +old acquaintance of mine; I had often kissed her when a boy, and she +had just as often boxed my ears. I used to give her a ribbon to tie up +her jaw with, telling her at the same time that she had too much of +it. This Abigail, like a true lady's maid, seeing me, whom she thought +a ghost, standing bolt upright, and the two ladies stretched out, as +she supposed, dead, gave a loud and most interesting scream, ran out +of the room for her life, nearly knocking down the footman, whom she +met coming in. + +This fellow, who was a country lout, the son of one of my father's +tenants, only popped his head into the door, and saw the ladies lying +on the carpet; he had probably formed no very good opinion of me from +the manner in which I had received the news of my own demise, and +seemed very much inclined to act the part of a mandarin, that is, nod +his head and stand still. + +"Desire some of the women to come here immediately," said I; "some +one that can be of use; tell them to bring salts, eau de cologue, any +thing. Fly, blockhead, goose, what do you stand staring at?" + +The fellow looked at me, and then at the supposed corpses, which +he must have thought I had murdered; and, either thunderstruck, or +doubting whether he had any right to obey me, kept his head inside the +door and his body outside, as if he had been in the pillory. I saw +that he required some explanation, and cried out, "I am Mr Frank; will +you obey me, or shall I throw this jar at your head?" brandishing one +of the china vases. + +Had I been inclined to have thrown it, I should have missed him, for +the fellow was off like a wounded porpoise. Down he ran to my father +in the library; "Oh, Sir--good news--bad news--good news--" + +"What news, fool?" said my father, rising hastily from his chair. + +"Oh, Sir, I don't know, Sir; but I believe, Sir, Mr Frank is alive +again, and both the ladies _is_ dead." + +My poor father, whose health and constitution had not recovered the +shock of my supposed death, tremblingly leaned over his table, on +which he rested his two hands, and desired the man to repeat what he +had said. This the fellow did, half crying, and my father, easily +comprehending the state of things, came upstairs. I would have flown +into his arms, but mine were occupied in supporting my sweet Emily, +while my poor sister lay senseless on the other side of me; for +Clara's lover was not at hand, and she still lay in abeyance. + +By this time "the hands were turned up," every body was on the alert, +and every living creature in the house, not excepting the dog, had +assembled in the drawing-room. The maids that had known me cried +and sobbed most piteously, and the new comer kept them company from +sympathy. The coachman, and footman, and groom, all blubbered and +stared; and one brought water, and one a basin, and the looby of a +footman something else, which I must not name; but in his hurry he +had snatched up the first utensil that he thought might be of use; I +approved of his zeal, but nodded to him to retire. Unluckily for him, +the housemaid perceived the mistake which his absence of thought had +led him into; and, snatching the mysterious vessel with her left hand, +she hid it under her apron, while with her right she gave the poor +fellow such a slap on the cheek, as to bring to my mind the tail of +the whale descending on the boat at Bermuda. "You great fool," said +she, "nobody wants that." + +"There is matrimony in that slap," said I; and the event proved I was +right--they were _asked_ in church the Sunday following. + +The industrious application of salts, cold water, and burnt rags, +together with chafing of temples, opening of collars, and loosening +the stay-laces of the young ladies, produced the happiest effects. +Every hand, and every tongue was in motion; and with all these +remedies, the eyes of the enchanting Emily opened, and beamed upon me, +spreading joy and gladness over the face of creation, like the sun +rising out of the bosom of the Atlantic, to cheer the inhabitants of +the Antilles after a frightful hurricane. In half an hour, all was +right; "the guns were secured--we beat the retreat;" the servants +retired. I became the centre of the picture. Emily held my right, my +father my left; dear Clara hung round my neck. Questions were put and +answered as fast as sobs and tears would admit of their being heard. +The interlude was filled up with the sweetest kisses from the rosiest +of lips; and I was in this half hour rewarded for all I had suffered +since I had sailed from England in the diabolical brig for Barbadoes. + +It was, I own, exceedingly wrong to have taken the house, as it were, +by storm, when I knew they were in mourning for me; but I forgot that +other people did not require the same stimulus as myself. I begged +pardon; was kissed again and again, and forgiven. Oh, it was worth +while to offend to be forgiven by such lips, and eyes, and dimples. +But I am afraid this thought is borrowed from some prose or poetry; if +so, the reader must forgive me, and so must the author, who may have +it again, now I have done with it, for I shall never use it any more. + +My narrative was given with as much modesty and brevity as time and +circumstances would admit. The coachman was despatched on one of the +best carriage-horses express to Mr Somerville, and the mail coach was +loaded with letters to all the friends and connections of the family. + +This ended, each retired to dress for dinner. What a change had one +hour wrought in this house of mourning, now suddenly turned into a +house of joy! Alas! how often is the picture reversed in human life! +The ladies soon reappeared in spotless white; emblems of their pure +minds. My father had put off his sables, and the servants came in +their usual liveries, which were very splendid. + +Dinner being announced, my father handed off Emily; I followed with +my sister. Emily, looking over her shoulder, said, "Don't be jealous, +Frank." + +My father laughed, and I vowed revenge for this little satirical hit. + +"You know the forfeit," said I, "and you shall pay it." + +"I am happy to say that I am both able and willing," said she, and we +sat down to dinner, but not before my father had given thanks in a +manner more than usually solemn and emphatic. This essential act of +devotion, so often neglected, brought tears into the eyes of +all. Emily sank into her chair, covered her face with her +pocket-handkerchief, and relieved herself with tears. Clara did the +same. My father shook me by the hand, and said, "Frank, this is a very +different kind of repast to what we had yesterday. How little did we +know of the happiness that was in store for us!" + +The young ladies dried their eyes, but had lost their appetites; in +vain did Emily endeavour to manage the tail of a small smelt. I filled +a glass of wine to each. "Come," said I, "in sea phrase, spirits are +always more easily stowed away than dry provisions; let us drink each +other's health, and then we shall get on better." + +They took my advice, and it answered the purpose. Our repast was +cheerful, but tempered and corrected by a feeling of past sorrow, and +a deep sense of great mercies from Heaven. + + "If Heaven were every day like this, + Then 'twere indeed a Heaven of bliss." + +Reader, I know you have long thought me a vain man--a profligate, +unprincipled Don Juan, ready to pray when in danger, and to sin when +out of it: but as I have always told you the truth, even when my +honour and character were at stake, I expect you will believe me now, +when I say a word in my own favour. That I felt gratitude to God for +my deliverance and safe return, I do most solemnly aver; my heart was +ready to burst with the escape of this feeling, which I suppressed +from a false sense of shame, though I never was given much to the +melting mood; moreover, I was too proud to show what I thought a +weakness, before the great he-fellows of footmen. Had we been in +private, I could have fallen down on my knees before that God whom I +had so often offended; who had rescued me twice from the jaws of the +shark; who had lifted me from the depth of the sea when darkness +covered me; who had saved me from the poison and the wreck, and guided +me clear of the rock at Trinidad; and who had sent the dog to save me +from a horrible death. + +These were only a small part of the mercies I had received; but they +were the most recent, and consequently had left the deepest impression +on my memory. I would have given one of Emily's approving smiles, much +as I valued them, to have been relieved from my oppressed feelings +by a hearty flood of tears, and by a solemn act of devotion and +thanksgiving; but I felt all this, and that feeling, I hope, was +accounted to me for righteousness. For the first time in my life, the +love of God was mixed up with a pure and earthly love for Emily, and +affection for my family. + +The ladies sat with us some time after the cloth was removed, unable +to drag themselves away, while I related my "hair-breadth escapes." +When I spoke of the incident of trying to save the poor man who fell +overboard from the brig--of my holding him by the collar, and being +dragged down with him until the sea became dark over my head--Emily +could bear it no longer; she jumped up, and falling on her knees, hid +her lovely face in my sister's lap, passionately exclaiming, "Oh, +do not, do not, my dear Frank, tell me any more--I cannot bear +it--indeed, I cannot bear it." + +We all gathered round her, and supported her to the drawing-room, +where we diverted ourselves with lighter and gayer anecdotes. Emily +tried a tune on the pianoforte, and attempted a song; but it would not +do: she could not sing a gay one, and a melancholy one overpowered +her. At twelve o'clock, we all retired to our apartments, and before I +slept I spent some minutes in devotion, with vows of amendment which I +fully intended to keep. + +The next morning, Mr Somerville joined us at breakfast. This was +another trial of feeling for poor Emily, who threw herself into her +father's arms, and sobbed aloud. Mr Somerville shook me most cordially +by the hand with both of his, and eagerly demanded the history of my +extraordinary adventures, of which I gave him a small abridgment. I +had taken the opportunity of an hour's _tête à tête_ with Emily, which +Clara had considerately given us before breakfast, to speak of our +anticipated union; and finding there were no other obstacles than +those which are usually raised by "maiden pride and bashful coyness," +so natural, so becoming, and so lovely in the sex, I determined to +speak to the grey-beards on the subject. + +To this Emily at last consented, on my reminding her of my late narrow +escapes. As soon, therefore, as the ladies had retired from the dinner +table, I asked my father to fill a bumper to their health; and, having +swallowed mine in all the fervency of the most unbounded love, I +popped the question to them both. Mr Somerville and my father looked +at each other, when the former said-- + +"You seem to be in a great hurry, Frank." + +"Not greater, Sir," said I, "than the object deserves." + +He bowed, and my father began-- + +"I cannot say," observed the good old gentleman, "that I much approve +of matrimony before you are a commander. At least, till then, you are +not your own master." + +"Oh, if I am to wait for that, Sir," said I, "I may wait long enough; +no man is ever his own master in our service, or in England. The +captain is commanded by the admiral, the admiral by the Admiralty, the +Admiralty by the Privy Council, the Privy Council by the Parliament, +the Parliament by the people, and the people by printers and their +devils." + +"I admire your logical chain of causes and effects," said my +father; "but we must, after all, go to the _lace manufactory_ at +Charing-cross, to see if we cannot have your shoulders fitted with a +pair of epaulettes. When we can see you command your own sloop of war, +I shall be most happy, as I am sure my good friend Somerville will be +also, to see you command his daughter, the finest and the best girl in +the county of ----" + +No arguments could induce the two old gentlemen to bate one inch from +these _sine qua non_. It was agreed that application should be made to +the Admiralty forthwith for my promotion; and when that desirable step +was obtained, that then Emily should have the disposal of me for the +honeymoon. + +All this was a very pretty story for them on the score of prudence, +but it did not suit the views of an ardent lover of one-and-twenty; +for though I knew my father's influence was very great at the +Admiralty, I also knew that an excellent regulation had recently been +promulgated, which prevented any lieutenant being promoted to the rank +of commander until he had served two years at sea from the date of his +first commission; nor could any commander, in like manner, be promoted +before he had served one year in that capacity. All this was no doubt +very good for the service, but I had not yet attained sufficient _amor +patriae_ to prefer the public to myself; and I fairly wished the +regulation, and the makers of it, in the cavern at New Providence, +just about the time of high water. + +I put it to the ladies whether this was not a case of real distress, +after all my hardships and my constancy, to be put off with such an +excuse? The answer from the Admiralty was so far favourable, that I +was assured I should be promoted as soon as my time was served, of +which I then wanted two months. I was appointed to a ship fitting at +Woolwich, and before she could be ready for sea, my time would be +completed, and I was to have my commission as a commander. This was +not the way to ensure her speedy equipment, as far as I was concerned; +but there was no help for it; and as the ship was at Woolwich, and the +residence of my fair one at no great distance, I endeavoured to pass +my time, during the interval, between the duties of love and war; +between obedience to my captain, and obedience to my mistress; and by +great good fortune, I contrived to please both, for my captain gave +himself no trouble about the ship or her equipment. + +Before I proceeded to join, I made one more effort to break through +the inflexibility of my father. I said I had undergone the labours of +Hercules; and that if I went again on foreign service, I might meet +with some young lady who would send me out of the world with a cup of +poison, or by some fatal spell break the magical chain which now bound +me to Emily. This poetical imagery had no more effect on them, than my +prose composition. I then appealed to Emily herself. "Surely," said I, +"your heart is not as hard as those of our inflexible parents? surely +you will be my advocate on this occasion? Bend but one look of +disapprobation on my father with those heavenly blue eyes of yours, +and, on my life, he will strike his flag." + +But the gipsy replied, with a smile (instigated, no doubt, from +head-quarters), that she did not like the idea of her name appearing +in the _Morning Post_ as the bride of a lieutenant. "What's a +lieutenant, now-a-days?" said she; "nobody. I remember when I was on a +visit at Fareham, I used to go to Portsmouth to see the dock-yard +and the ships, and there was your great friend the tall admiral, Sir +Hurricane Humbug, I think you call him, driving the poor lieutenants +about like so many sheep before a dog; there was one always at his +heels, like a running footman; and there was another that appeared to +me to be chained, like a mastiff, to the door of the admiral's office, +except when the admiral and family walked out, and then he brought +up the rear with the governess. No, Frank, I shall not surrender at +discretion, with all my charms, to any thing less than a captain, with +a pair of gold epaulettes." + +"Very well," replied I, looking into the pier glass, with tolerable +self-complacency; "if you choose to pin your happiness on the promises +of a first lord of the Admiralty, and a pair of epaulettes, I can say +no more. There is no accounting for female taste; some ladies prefer +gold lace and wrinkles, to youth and beauty--I am sorry for them, +that's all." + +"Frank," said Emily, "you must acknowledge that you are vain enough to +be an admiral at least." + +"The admirals are much obliged to you for the compliment," said I. "I +trust I should not disgrace the flag, come when it will; but to tell +you the truth, my dear Emily, I cannot, say I look forward to that +elevation, with any degree of satisfaction. Three stars on each +shoulder, and three rows of gold lace round the cuff, are no +compensation, in my eyes, for grey hairs, thin legs, a broken back, a +church-yard cough, and to be laughed at or pitied by all the pretty +girls in the country into the bargain." + +"I am sorry for you, my hero," said the young lady; "but you must +submit." + +"Well then, if I must, I must," said I; "but give me a kiss in the +meantime." + +I asked for one, and took a hundred, and should have taken a hundred +more, but the confounded butler came in, and brought me a letter on +service, which was neither more nor less than an order to join my ship +forthwith; _sic transit_, &c. + +Pocketing my disappointment with as much _sang froid_ as I could +muster, I continued to beguile the time and to solace myself for my +past sufferings, by as much enjoyment as could be compressed into the +small space of leisure time allotted to me. Fortunately, the first +lieutenant of the frigate was what we used to call "a hard officer;" +he never went on shore, because he had few friends and less money. He +drew for his pay on the day it became due, and it lasted till the next +day of payment; and as I found he doated on a Spanish cigar, and +a _correct_ glass of cognac grog--for he never drank to excess--I +presented him with a box of the former, and a dozen of the latter, to +enable him to bear my nightly absence with Christian composure. + +As soon as the day's work was ended, the good-natured lieutenant used +to say, "Come, Mr Mildmay, I know what it is to be in love; I was once +in love myself, though it is a good many years ago, and I am sure I +shall get into the good graces of your Polly (for so he called Emily) +if I send you to her arms. There is the jolly for you: send the boat +off as soon as you have landed, and be with us at nine to-morrow +morning, to meet the midshipman and the working party in the +dock-yard." + +All this was perfectly agreeable to me. I generally got to Mr +Somerville's temporary residence on Blackheath by the time the +dressing-bell rang, and never failed to meet a pleasant party at +dinner. My father and dear Clara were guests in the house as well as +myself. By Mr Somerville's kind permission, I introduced Talbot, who, +being a perfect gentleman in his manners, a man of sound sense, good +education, and high aristocratic connections, I was proud to call +my friend. I presented him particularly to my sister, and took an +opportunity of whispering in Emily's ear, where I knew it would not +long remain, that he possessed the indispensable qualification of two +epaulettes. "Therefore," said I, "pray do not trust yourself too near +him, for fear you should be taken by surprise, like the _True-blooded +Yankee_." + +Talbot knowing that Emily was bespoken, paid her no more than the +common attentions which courtesy demands; but to Clara his demeanour +was very different: and her natural attractions were much enhanced in +his eyes, by the friendship which we had entertained for each other +ever since the memorable affair of swimming away from the ship at +Spithead; from that time he used jocularly to call me "Leander." + +But before I proceed any further with this part of my history, I must +beg leave to detain the reader one minute only, while I attempt to +make a sketch of my dear little sister Clara. She was rather fair, +with a fine, small, oval, well-proportioned face, sparkling black and +speaking eyes, good teeth, pretty red lips, very dark hair, and plenty +of it, hanging over her face and neck in curls of every size; her arms +and bust were such as Phidias and Praxiteles might have copied; her +waist was slender; her hands and feet small and beautiful. I used +often to think it was a great pity that such a love as she was should +not be matched with some equally good specimen of our sex; and I had +long fixed on my friend Talbot as the person best adapted to command +this pretty little, tight, fast-sailing, well-rigged smack. + +Unluckily, Clara, with all her charms, had one fault, and that, in +my eyes, was a very serious one. Clara did not love a sailor. The +soldiers she doated on. But Clara's predilections were not easily +overcome, and that which had once taken root grew up and flourished. +She fancied sailors were not well bred; that they thought too much of +themselves or their ships; and, in short, that they were as rough and +unpolished as they were conceited. + +With such obstinate and long-rooted prejudices against all of our +profession, it proved no small share of merit in Talbot to overcome +them. But as Clara's love for the army was more general than +particular, Talbot had a vacant theatre to fight in. He began by +handing her to dinner, and with modest assurance seated himself by +her side. But so well was he aware of her failing, that he never once +alluded to our unfortunate element; on the contrary, he led her away +with every variety of topic which he found best suited to her taste: +so that she was at last compelled to acknowledge that he might be one +exception to her rule, and I took the liberty of hoping that I might +be another. + +One day at dinner Talbot called me "Leander," which instantly +attracted the notice of the ladies, and an explanation was demanded; +but for a time it was evaded, and the subject changed. Emily, however, +joining together certain imperfect reports which had reached her ears, +through the kindness of "some friends of the family," began to suspect +a rival, and the next morning examined me so closely on the subject, +that fearing a disclosure from other quarters, I was compelled to make +a confession. + +I told her the whole history of my acquaintance with Eugenia, of my +last interview, and of her mysterious departure. I did not even +omit the circumstance of her offering me money; but I concealed the +probability of her being a mother. I assured her that it was full +four years and a half since we had met; and that as she knew of my +engagement, it was unlikely we should ever meet again. "At any rate," +I said, "I shall never seek her; and if accident should throw me in +her way, I trust I shall behave like a man of honour." + +I did not think it necessary to inform her of the musket-shots fired +at me by order of Talbot, as that might have injured him in the +estimation of both Emily and Clara. When I had concluded my narrative, +Emily sighed and looked very grave. I asked her if she had forgiven +me. + +"Conditionally," said she, "as you said to the mutineers." + + + + +Chapter XXIII + + In all states of Europe, there are a set of men who assume from + their infancy a pre-eminence independent of their moral character. + The attention paid to them from the moment of their birth, gives + them the idea that they are formed for command, and they soon + learn to consider themselves a distinct species: and, being secure + of a certain rank and station, take no pains to makes themselves + worthy of it.--RAYNAL. + +It is now time to make my reader acquainted with my new ship and +new captain. The first was a frigate of the largest class, built on +purpose to cope with the large double-banked frigates of the Yankees. +She carried thirty long twenty-four pounders on her main deck, and the +same number of forty-two pound carronades on her quarter-gangways and +forecastle. + +I had been a week on board, doing duty during the day and flirting on +shore, at Mr Somerville's, at Blackheath, during the evening. I had +seen no captain yet, and the first lieutenant had gone on shore one +morning to stretch his legs. I was commanding officer; the people were +all at their dinner; it was a drizzling soft rain, and I was walking +the quarter-deck by myself, when a shore-boat came alongside with a +person in plain clothes. I paid him no attention, supposing him to be +a wine merchant, or a slop-seller, come to ask permission to serve the +ship. The stranger looked at the dirty man-ropes, which the side-boys +held off to him, and inquired if there was not a clean pair? The lad +replied in the negative; and the stranger perceiving there was no +remedy, took hold of the dirty ropes and ascended the side. + +Reaching the quarter-deck, he come up to me, and showing a pair of +sulphur-coloured gloves, bedaubed with tar and dirt, angrily observed, +"By G----, Sir, I have spoiled a new pair of gloves." + +"I always take my gloves off when I come up the side," said I. + +"But I choose to keep mine on," said the stranger. "And why could not +I have had a pair of clean ropes?" + +"Because," said I, "my orders are only to give them when the side is +piped." + +"And why was not the side piped for me, Sir?" + +"Because, Sir, we never pipe the side until we know who it is for." + +"As sure as I shall sit in the House of Peers, I will report you to +your captain for this," said he. + +"We only pipe the side for officers in uniform," said I; "and I am yet +to learn by what right you demand that honour." + +"I am, Sir," said he (showing his card), "...., &c. Do you know me +now?" + +"Yes, Sir," said I, "as a gentleman; but until I see you in a +captain's uniform, I cannot give you the honours you demand:" as I +said this, I touched my hat respectfully. + +"Then, Sir," said he, "as sure as I shall sit in the House of Peers, I +shall let you know more of this:" and having asked whether the captain +was on board, and received an answer in the negative, he turned round +and went down the side into his boat, without giving me an opportunity +of supplying him with a pair of clean ropes. He pulled away for the +shore, and I never heard any thing more of the dirty ropes and soiled +gloves. + +This officer, I afterwards learned, was in the habit of interlarding +his discourse with this darling object of his ambition; but as he is +now a member of the Upper House, it is to be supposed he has exchanged +the affidavit for some other. While he commanded a ship, he used to +say, "As sure as I shall sit in the House of Peers, I will flog +you, my man;" and when this denunciation had passed his lips, the +punishment was never remitted. With us, the reverse of this became our +bye-word; lieutenants, midshipmen, sailors and marines, asserted their +claim to veracity by saying, "As sure as I shall _not_ sit in the +House of Peers." + +This was the noble lord, who when in the command of one of his +Majesty's ships in China, employed a native of that country to take +his portrait. The resemblance not having been flattering, the artist +was sharply rebuked by his patron. The poor man replied, "Ai awe, +master, how can handsome face make if handsome face no have got?" This +story has, like many other good stories, been pirated, and applied to +other cases; but I claim it as the legitimate property of the navy, +and can vouch for its origin as I have related. + +My messmates dropped in one after another until our number was +completed; and at length a note, in an envelope addressed to the first +lieutenant "on service," and marked on the lower left hand corner with +the name of the noble writer, announced that our captain would make +his appearance on the following day. We were of course prepared to +receive him in our full uniforms with our cocked hats and swords, with +the marine guard under arms. He came alongside at half-past twelve +o'clock, when the men were at dinner, an unusual hour to select, as +it is not the custom ever to disturb them at their meals if it can +be avoided. He appeared in a sort of undress frock coat, fall down +collar, anchor buttons, no epaulettes, and a lancer's cap, with a +broad gold band. + +This was not correct, but as he was a lord, he claimed privilege, and +on this rock of privilege we found afterwards that he always perched +himself on every occasion. We were all presented to him; and to each +he condescended to give a nod. His questions were all confined to the +first lieutenant, and all related to his own comforts. "Where is my +steward to lie? where is my valet to sleep? where is my cow-pen? and +where are my sheep to be?" We discovered when he had been one hour in +our company, that his noble self was the god of his idolatry. As +for the details of the ship and her crew, masts, rigging, stowage, +provisions, the water she would carry, and how much she drew, they +were subjects on which he never fatigued his mind. + +One hour having expired since he had come on board, he ordered his +boat, and returned to the shore, and we saw no more of him until we +arrived at Spithead, when his lordship came on board, accompanied by +a person whom we soon discovered was a half pay purser in the navy: +a man who, by dint of the grossest flattery and numerous little +attentions, had so completely ingratiated himself with his patron, +that he had become as necessary an appendage to the travelling +equipage, as the portmanteau or the valet-de-chambre. This despicable +toady was his lordship's double; he was a living type of the Gnatho of +Terence; and I never saw him without remembering the passage that ends +"_si negat id quoque nego_." Black was white, and white was black +with toady, if his lordship pleased; he messed in the cabin, did much +mischief in the ship, and only escaped kicking, because he was too +contemptible to be kicked. + +My fair readers are no doubt anxious to know how I parted with Emily, +and truly I am not unwilling to oblige them, though it is, indeed, +a tender subject. As soon as we received our orders to proceed to +Spithead, Mr Somerville, who had kept his house at Blackheath while +the ship was fitting, in hopes that my promotion might have taken +place before she was ready, now prepared to quit the place. To the +renewed application of my father, the answer was that I must go abroad +for my promotion. This at once decided him to break up his summer +quarters, very wisely foreseeing that unless he did so, my services +would be lost to my ship; and if he and Emily did not leave me behind +at Woolwich, I should probably be left behind by my captain: he +therefore announced his intended departure within twenty-four hours. + +Emily was very sorry, and so was I. I kindly reproached her with her +cruelty; but she replied with a degree of firmness and good sense, +which I could not but admire, that she had but one counsellor, and +that was her father, and that until she was married, she never +intended to have any other; that by his advice she had delayed the +union: and as we were neither of us very old people, "I trust in God," +said she, "we may meet again." I admired her heroism, gave her one +kiss, handed her into her carriage, and we shook hands. I need not say +I saw a tear or two in her eyes. Mr Somerville saw the shower coming +on, pulled up the glass, gave me a friendly nod, and the carriage +drove off. The last I saw of Emily, at that time, was her right hand, +which carried her handkerchief to her eyes. + +After the dear inmates were gone, I turned from the door of the house +in disgust, and ran direct to my boat, like a dog with a tin-kettle. +When I got on board, I hated the sight of every body, and the smell +of every thing; pitch, paint, bilge-water, tar and rum, entering into +horrible combination, had conspired against me: and I was as sick and +as miserable as the most love-sick seaman can conceive. I have before +observed that we had arrived at Spithead, and as I have nothing new to +say of that place, I shall proceed to sea. + +We sailed for the North American station, the pleasantest I could go +to when away from Emily. Our passage was tedious, and we were put on +short allowance of water. Those only who have known it will understand +it. All felt it but the captain; who, claiming privilege, took a dozen +gallons every day to bathe his feet in, and that water, when done +with, was greedily sought for by the men. There was some murmuring +about it, which came to the captain's ears, who only observed, with an +apathy peculiar to Almack's, + +"Well, you know, if a man has no privilege, what's the use of being a +captain?" + +"Very true, my lord," said the toad-eater, with a low bow. + +I will now give a short description of his lordship. He was a smart, +dapper, well made man, with a handsome, but not an intellectual +countenance; cleanly and particular in his person; and, assisted by +the puffs of Toady, had a very good opinion of himself; proud of his +aristocratic birth, and still more vain of his personal appearance. +His knowledge on most points was superficial--high life, and anecdotes +connected with it, were the usual topics of his discourse; at his +own table he generally engrossed all the conversation: and while his +guests drank his wine, "they laughed with counterfeited glee," &c. His +reading was comprised in two volumes octavo, being the Memoirs of the +Count de Grammont, which amusing and aristocratical work was never out +of his hand. He had been many years at sea; but strange to say, knew +nothing, literally nothing, of his profession. Seamanship, navigation, +and every thing connected with the service, he was perfectly ignorant +of. I had heard him spoken of as a good officer, before he joined +us; and I must, in justice to him, say that he was naturally good +tempered, and I believe as brave a man as ever drew a sword. + +He seldom made any professional remark, being aware of his deficiency, +and never ventured beyond his depth intentionally. When he came on the +quarter-deck, he usually looked at the weather main-brace, and if it +was not as _taut_ as a bar, would order it to be made so. Here he +could not easily commit himself: but it became a bye-word with us +when we laughed at him below. He had a curious way of forgetting, or +pretending to forget, the names of men and things, I presume, because +they were so much beneath him; and in their stead, substituted the +elegant phrases of "What's-his-name," "What-do-ye-call-'em," and +"thingumbob." + +One day he came on deck, and actually gave me the following very +intelligible order. "Mr, What's-his-name, have the goodness +to--what-do-ye-call-'em,--the,--the thingumbob." + +"Ay, ay, my lord," said I. "Afterguard! haul taut the weather +main-brace." This was exactly what he meant. + +He was very particular and captious when not properly addressed. When +an order is given by a commanding officer, it is not unusual to say, +"Very good, Sir;" implying that you perfectly understand, and are +going cheerfully to obey it. I had adopted this answer, and gave it to +his lordship when I received an order from him, saying "Very good, my +lord." + +"Mr Mildmay," said his lordship, "I don't suppose you mean anything +like disrespect, but I will thank you not to make that answer again: +it is for _me_ to say 'very good,' and not you. You seem to approve +of my order, and I don't like it; I beg you will not do it again, you +know." + +"Very good, my lord," said I, so inveterate is habit. "I beg your +lordship's pardon, I mean very well." + +"I don't much like that young man," said his lordship to his toady, +who followed him up and down the quarter-deck, like "the bob-tail +cur," looking his master in the face. I did not hear the answer, but +of course it was an echo. + +The first time we reefed topsails at sea, the captain was on deck; he +said nothing, but merely looked on. The second time, we found he had +caught all the words of the first lieutenant, and repeated them in a +loud and pompous voice, without knowing whether they were applicable +to the case or not. The third time he fancied he was able to go alone, +and down he fell--he made a sad mistake indeed. "Hoist away +the fore-topsail," said the first lieutenant. "Hoist away the +fore-topsail," said the captain. The men were stamping aft, and the +topsail yards travelling up to the mast-head very fast, when they were +stopped by a sudden check with the fore-topsail haul-yards. + +"What's the matter?" said the first lieutenant, calling to me, who was +at my station on the forecastle. + +"Something foul of the topsail-tie," I replied. + +"What's the matter forward?" said the captain. + +"Topsail-tie is foul, my lord," answered the first lieutenant. + +"D----n the topsail-tie! cut it away. Out knife there, aloft! I _will_ +have the topsail hoisted; cut away the topsail-tie." + +For the information of my land readers, I should observe that the +topsail-tie was the very rope which was at that moment suspending the +yard aloft. The cutting it would have disabled the ship until it could +have been repaired; and had the order been obeyed, the topsail-yard +itself, would, in all probability, have been sprung or broke in two on +the cap. + +We arrived at Halifax without falling in with an enemy; and as soon as +the ship was secured, I went on shore to visit all my dear Dulcineas, +every one of whom I persuaded, that on her account alone I had used my +utmost interest to be sent out on the station. Fortunately for them +and for me, I was not long permitted to trifle away my time. We were +ordered to cruise on the coast of North America. It was winter and +very cold; we encountered many severe gales of wind, during which time +we suffered much from the frequent and sudden snowstorms, north-east +gales, and sharp frosts, which rendered our running-rigging almost +unmanageable, and obliged us to pour boiling water into the sheaves of +the blocks to thaw them, and allow the ropes to traverse; nor did the +cold permit the captain to honour us with his presence on deck more +than once in the twenty-four hours. + +We anchored off a part of the coast, which was not in a state of +defence, and the people being unprotected by their own government, +considered themselves as neutrals, and supplied us with as much fish, +poultry, and vegetables, as we required. While we lay here, the +captain and officers frequently went on shore for a short time without +molestation. One night, after the captain had returned, a snow-storm +and a gale of wind came on. The captain's gig, which ought to have +been hoisted up, was not; she broke her painter, and went adrift, and +had been gone some time before she was missed. The next morning, on +making inquiry, it was found that the boat had drifted on shore a few +miles from where we lay; and that having been taken possession of by +the Americans, they had removed her to a hostile part of the coast, +twenty-two miles off. The captain was very much annoyed at the loss of +his boat, which he considered as his own private property, although +built on board by the king's men, and with the king's plank and nails. + +"As my private property," said his lordship, "it ought to be given up, +you know." + +I did not tell him that I had seen the sawyers cutting an anchor-stock +into the plank of which it was built, and that the said plank had been +put down to other services in the expense-book. This, however, was no +business of mine; nor had I any idea that the loss of this little boat +would so nearly produce my final catastrophe; so it was, however, and +very serious results took place in consequence of this accident. + +"They _must_ respect private property, you know," said the captain to +the first lieutenant. + +"Yes," answered the lieutenant; "but they do not know that it is +private property." + +"Very true: then I will send and tell them so;" and down he went to +his dinner. + +The yawl was ordered to be got ready, and hoisted out at daylight, and +I had notice given me that I was to go away in her. About nine o'clock +the next morning, I was sent for into the cabin; his lordship was +still in bed, and the green silk curtains were drawn close round his +cot. + +"Mr Thingamy," said his lordship, "you will take the what's-his-name, +you know." + +"Yes, my lord," said I. + +"And you will go to that town, and ask for my thingumbob." + +"For your gig, my lord?" said I. + +"Yes, that's all." + +"But, my lord, suppose they won't give it to me?" + +"Then take it." + +"Suppose the gig is not there, my lord, and if there, suppose they +refuse to give it up?" + +"Then take every vessel out of the harbour." + +"Very well, my lord. Am I to put the gun in the boat? or to take +muskets only?" + +"Oh, no, no arms--take a flag of truce--No. 8 (white flag) will do." + +"Suppose they will not accept the flag of truce, my lord?" + +"Oh, but they will: they always respect a flag of truce, you know." + +"I beg your lordship's pardon, but I think a few muskets in the boat +would be of service." + +"No, no, no,--no arms. You will be fighting about nothing. You have +your orders, Sir." + +"Yes," thinks I, "I have. If I succeed, I am a robber; if I fail, I am +liable to be hanged on the first tree." + +I left the cabin, and went to the first lieutenant. I told him what my +orders were. This officer was, as I before observed, a man who had no +friends, and was therefore entirely dependent on the captain for his +promotion, and was afraid to act contrary to his lordship's orders, +however absurd. I told him, that whatever might me the captain's +orders, I would not go without arms. + +"The orders of his lordship must be obeyed," said the lieutenant. + +"Why," said I, irritated at his folly, "you are as clever a fellow as +the skipper." + +This he considered so great an affront, that he ran down to his cabin, +saying, "You shall hear from me again for this, Sir." + +I concluded that he meant to try me by a court-martial, to which I had +certainly laid myself open by this unguarded expression; but I went on +the quarter-deck, and, during his absence, got as many muskets into +the boat as I wanted, with a proper proportion of ammunition. This +was hardly completed, before the lieutenant came up again, and put +a letter into my hands: which was no more than the very comfortable +intelligence, that, on my return from the expedition on which I was +then going, he should expect satisfaction for the affront I had +offered him. I was glad, however, to find it was no worse. I laughed +at his threat; and, as the very head and front of my offending was +only having compared him to the captain, he could not show any +resentment openly, for fear of displeasing his patron. In short, to be +offended at it, was to offer the greatest possible affront to the +man he looked up to for promotion, and thus destroy all his golden +prospects. + +As I put this well-timed challenge into my pocket, I walked down the +side, got into my boat, and put off. It wanted but one hour of sunset +when I reached the part where this infernal gig was supposed to be, +and the sky gave strong indications of an approaching gale. Indeed, I +do not believe another captain in the navy could have been found who, +at such a season of the year, would have risked a boat so far from the +ship on an enemy's coast and a lee-shore, for such a worthless object. + +My crew consisted of twenty men and a midshipman. When we arrived off +the mouth of the harbour, we perceived four vessels lying at anchor, +and pulled directly in. We had, however, no opportunity of trying our +flag of truce, for as soon as we came within range of musket-shot, a +volley from two hundred concealed militiamen struck down four of my +men. There was then nothing left for it but to board, and bring out +the vessels. Two of them were aground, and we set them on fire, it +being dead low water (thanks to the delay in the morning): in doing +this, we had more men wounded. I then took possession of the other two +vessels, and giving one of them in charge of the midshipman, who was +quite a lad, I desired him to weigh his anchor. I gave him the boat, +with all the men except four, which I kept with me. The poor fellow +probably lost more men, for he cut his cable, and got out before me. +I weighed my anchor, but had one of my men killed by a musket ball in +doing it. I stood out after the midshipman. We had gained an offing +of four miles, when a violent gale and snow-storm came on. The sails +belonging to the vessel all blew to rags immediately, being very old. +I had no resource, except to anchor, which I did on a bank, in five +fathom water. The other vessel lost all her sails, and, having no +anchor, as I then conjectured, and afterwards learned, drifted on +shore, and was dashed to pieces, the people being either frozen to +death, wounded, or taken prisoners. + +The next morning I could see the vessel lying on shore a wreck, +covered with ice. A dismal prospect to me, as at that time I knew not +what had become of the men. My own situation was even less enviable; +the vessel was frail, and deeply laden with salt: a cargo, which, if +it by any means gets wet, is worse than water, since it cannot be +pumped out, and becomes as heavy as lead; nothing could, in that +event, have kept the vessel afloat, and we had no boat in case of such +an accident. I had three men with me, besides the dead body, in the +cabin, and a pantry as clear as an empty house: not an article of any +description to eat. I was four miles from the shore, in a heavy gale +of wind, the pleasure of which was enhanced by snow, and the bitterest +cold I ever experienced. We proceeded to examine the vessel, and found +that there was on board a quantity of sails and canvas, that did not +fit, but had been bought with an intention of making up for this +vessel, and not before she wanted them; there was also an abundance of +palms, needles, and twine; but to eat, there was nothing except salt, +and to drink, nothing but one cask of fresh water. We kindled a fire +in the cabin, and made ourselves as warm as we could, taking a view +on deck now and then, to see if she drove, or if the gale abated. She +pitched heavily, taking in whole seas over the forecastle, and the +water froze on the deck. The next morning we found we had drifted +a mile nearer to the shore, and the gale continued with unabated +violence. The other vessel lay a wreck, with her masts gone, and as it +were _in terrorem_, staring us in the face. + +We felt the most pinching hunger; we had no fuel after the second day, +except what we pulled down from the bulkheads of the cabin. We amused +ourselves below, making a suit of sails for the vessel, and drinking +hot water to repel the cold. But this work could not have lasted long; +the weather became more intensely cold, and twice did we set the prize +on fire, in our liberality with the stove to keep ourselves warm. The +ice formed on the surface of the water in our kettle, till it was +dissolved by the heat from the bottom. The second night passed like +the first; and we found, in the morning, that we had drifted within +two miles of the shore. We completed our little sails this day, and +with great difficulty contrived to bend them. + +The men were now exhausted with cold and hunger, and proposed that we +should cut our cable and run on shore; but I begged them to wait till +the next morning, as these gales seldom lasted long. This they agreed +to: and we again huddled together to keep ourselves warm, the outside +man pulling the dead man close to him by way of a blanket. The gale +this night moderated, and towards the morning the weather was fine, +although the wind was against us, and to beat her up to the ship was +impossible. From the continued freezing of the water, the bob-stays +and the rigging were coated with ice five or six inches thick, and the +forecastle was covered with two feet of clear ice, showing the ropes +coiled underneath it. + +There was no more to be done: so, desiring the men to cut the cable, +I made up my mind to run the vessel on shore, and give myself up. +We hoisted the foresail, and I stood in with the intention of +surrendering myself and people at a large town which I knew was +situated about twelve miles farther on the coast. To have given myself +up at the place where the vessels had been captured, I did not think +would have been prudent. + +When we made sail on the third morning, we had drifted within half a +mile of the shore, and very near the place we had left. Field pieces +had been brought down to us. They had the range, but they could not +reach us. I continued to make more sail, and to creep along shore, +until I came within a few cables' length of the pier, where men, +women, and children were assembled to see us land; when suddenly a +snow-storm came on; the wind shifted, and blew with such violence, +that I could neither see the port, nor turn the vessel to windward +into it; and as I knew I could not hold my own, and that the wind was +fair for our ship, then distant about forty miles, we agreed to up +helm and scud for her. + +This was well executed. About eleven at night we hailed her, and asked +for a boat. They had seen us approaching, and a boat instantly came, +taking us all on board the frigate, and leaving some fresh hands in +charge of the prize. + +I was mad with hunger and cold, and with difficulty did we get up the +side, so exhausted and feeble were the whole of us. I was ordered down +into the cabin, for it was too cold for the captain to show his face +on deck. I found his lordship sitting before a good fire, with his +toes in the grate; a decanter of Madeira stood on the table, with a +wine glass, and most fortunately, though not intended for my use, a +large rummer. This I seized with one hand and the decanter with the +other; and, filling a bumper, swallowed it in a moment, without even +drinking his lordship's good health. He stared, and I believe thought +me mad. I certainly do own that my dress and appearance perfectly +corresponded with my actions. I had not been washed, shaved, or +"cleaned," since I had left the ship, three days before. My beard was +grown, my cheeks hollow, my eyes sunk, and for my stomach, I leave +that to those fortunate Frenchmen who escaped from the Russian +campaign, who only can appreciate my sufferings. My whole haggard +frame was enveloped in a huge blue flushing coat, frosted, like a +plum-cake, with ice and snow. + +As soon as I could speak, I said, "I beg pardon, my lord, but I have +had nothing to eat or drink since I left the ship." + +"Oh, _then_ you are very welcome," said his lordship; "I never +expected to see you again." + +"Then why the devil did you send me?" thought I to myself. + +During this short dialogue, I had neither been offered a chair nor any +refreshment, of which I stood so much in need; and if I had been able, +should have been kept standing while I related my adventures. I was +about to commence, when the wine got into my head; and to support +myself, I leaned, or rather staggered, on the back of a chair. + +"Never mind now," said the captain, apparently moved from his listless +apathy by my situation; "go and make yourself comfortable, and I will +hear it all to-morrow." + +This was the only kind thing he had ever done for me; and it came so +_apropos_, that I felt grateful to him for it, thanked him, and went +below to the gun-room, where, notwithstanding all I had heard and read +of the dangers of repletion after long abstinence, I ate voraciously, +and drank proportionably, ever and anon telling my astonished +messmates, who were looking on, what a narrow escape the dead body +had of being dissected and broiled. This, from the specimen of my +performance, they had no difficulty in believing. I recommended the +three men who had been with me to the care of the surgeon; and, with +his permission, presented each of them with a pint of hot brandy and +water, well sweetened, by way of a night cap. Having taken these +precautions, and satisfied the cravings of nature on my own part, as +well as the cravings of curiosity on that of my messmates, I went to +bed, and slept soundly till the next day at noon. + +Thus ended this anomalous and fatal expedition: an ambassador sent +with the sacred emblem of peace, to commit an act of hostility under +its protection. To have been taken under such circumstances, would +have subjected us to be hung like dogs on the first tree; to have gone +unarmed, would have been an act of insanity, and I therefore took upon +me to disobey an unjust and absurd order. This, however, must not be +pleaded as an example to juniors, but a warning to seniors how they +give orders without duly weighing the consequences: the safest plan +is always to obey. Thus did his Majesty's service lose eighteen fine +fellows, under much severe suffering, for a boat, "the _private_ +property" of the captain, not worth twenty pounds. + +The next day, as soon as I was dressed, the first lieutenant sent to +speak to me. I then recollected the little affair of the challenge. "A +delightful after-piece," thought I, "to the tragedy, to be shot by +the first lieutenant only for calling him as clever a fellow as the +captain." The lieutenant, however, had no such barbarous intentions; +he had seen and acknowledged the truth of my observation, and, being +a well meaning north-countryman, he offered me his hand, which I took +with pleasure, having had quite enough of stimulus for that time. + + + + +Chapter XXIV + + _Bell_. You have an opportunity now, Madam, to revenge yourself + upon him for affronting your squirrel. _Belin_. O, the filthy, + rude beast. _Aram_. 'Tis a lasting quarrel. + + _Old Bachelor_. + + +We sailed the next day, and after one month more of unsuccessful +cruising, arrived safe at Halifax, where I was informed that an old +friend of my father's, Sir Hurricane Humbug, of whom some mention has +already been made in this work, had just arrived. He was not in an +official character, but had come out to look after his own property. +It is absolutely necessary that I should here, with more than usual +formality, introduce the reader to an intimate acquaintance with the +character of Sir Hurricane. + +Sir Hurricane had risen in life by his own ingenuity, and the +patronage of a rich man in the South of England: he was of an +ardent disposition, and was an admirable justice of peace, when the +_argumentum baculinum_ was required, for which reason he had been +sent to reduce two or three refractory establishments to order and +obedience; and, by his firmness and good humour, succeeded. His tact +was a little knowledge of everything (not like Solomon's, from the +hyssop to the cedar), but from the boiler of a potato to the boiler of +a steam-boat, and from catching a sprat to catching a whale; he could +fatten pigs and poultry, and had a peculiar way of improving the size, +though not the breed of the latter; in short, he was "jack of all +trades and master of none." + +I shall not go any farther back with his memoirs than the day he chose +to teach an old woman how to make mutton-broth. He had, in the course +of an honest discharge of his duty, at a certain very dirty sea-port +town, incurred the displeasure of the lower orders generally: he +nevertheless would omit no opportunity of doing good, and giving +advice to the poor, gratis. One day he saw a woman emptying the +contents of a boiling kettle out of her door into the street. He +approached, and saw a leg of mutton at the bottom, and the unthrifty +housewife throwing away the liquor in which it had been boiled. + +"Good woman," said the economical baronet, "do you know what you +are doing? A handful of meat, a couple of carrots, and a couple of +turnips, cut up into dice, and thrown into that liquor, with a little +parsley, would make excellent mutton-broth for your family." + +The old woman looked up, and saw the ogre of the dockyard; and either +by losing her presence of mind, or by a most malignant slip of the +hand, she contrived to pour a part of the boiling water into the shoes +of Sir Hurricane. The baronet jumped, roared, hopped, stamped, kicked +off his shoes, and ran home, d----ning the old woman, and himself too, +for having tried to teach her how to make mutton-broth. As he ran off, +the ungrateful hag screamed after him, "Sarves you right; teach you to +mind your own business." + +The next day, in his magisterial capacity, he commanded the attendance +of "the dealer in slops." "Well, Madam, what have you got to say for +yourself for scalding one of his Majesty's Justices of the Peace? +don't you know that I have the power to commit you to Maidstone gaol +for the assault?" + +"I beg your honour's pardon, humbly," said the woman; "I did not know +it was your honour, or I am sure I wouldn't a done it; besides, I own +to your honour, I had a drop too much." + +The good-natured baronet dismissed her with a little suitable advice, +which no doubt the good woman treated as she did that relative to the +mutton-broth. + +My acquaintance with Sir Hurricane had commenced at Plymouth, when he +kicked my ship to sea in a gale of wind, for fear we should ground on +our beef bones. I never forgave him for that. My father had shown him +great civility, and had introduced me to him. When at Halifax, we +resided in the same house with a mutual friend, who had always +received me as his own son. He had a son of my own age, with whom I +had long been on terms of warm friendship, and Ned and I confederated +against Sir Hurricane. Having paid a few visits _en passant_, as I +landed at the King's Wharf, shook hands with a few pretty girls, and +received their congratulations on my safe return, I went to the house +of my friend, and, without ceremony, walked into the drawing-room. + +"Do you know, Sir," said the footman, "that Sir Hurricane is in his +room? but he is very busy," added the man, with a smile. + +"Busy or not," said I, "I am sure he will see me," so in I walked. + +Sir Hurricane was employed on something, but I could not distinctly +make out what. He had a boot between his knees and the calves of his +legs, which he pressed together, and as he turned his head round, I +perceived that he held a knife between his teeth. + +"Leave the door open, messmate," said he, without taking the least +notice of me. Then rising, he drew a large, black, tom cat, by the +tail, out of the boot, and flinging it away from him to a great +distance, which distance was rapidly increased by the voluntary +exertion of the cat, which ran away as if it had been mad, "There," +said he, "and be d----d to you, you have given me more trouble than a +whole Kentucky farm-yard; but I shall not lose my sleep any more, by +your d----d caterwauling." + +All this was pronounced as if he had not seen me--in fact, it was a +soliloquy, for the cat did not stay to hear it. "Ah!" said he, holding +out his hand to me, "how do you do? I know your face, but d----n me if I +have not forgot your name." + +"My name, Sir," said I, "is Mildmay." + +"Ah, Mildmay, my noble, how do you do? how did you leave your father? +I knew him very well--used to give devilish good feeds--many a plate +I've dirtied at his table--don't care how soon I put my legs under +it again;--take care, mind which way you put your helm--you will be +aboard of my chickabiddies--don't run athwart hawse." + +I found, on looking down, that I had a string round my leg, which +fastened a chicken to the table, and saw many more of these little +creatures attached to the chairs in the room; but for what purpose +they were thus domesticated I could not discover. + +"Are these pet chickens of yours, Sir Hurricane?" said I. + +"No," said the admiral, "but I mean them to be pet capons, by and by, +when they come to table. I finished a dozen and a half this morning, +besides that d----d old tom cat." + +The mystery was now explained, and I afterwards found out (every man +having his hobby) that the idiosyncrasy of this officer's disposition +had led him to the practice of neutralising the males of any species +of bird or beast, in order to render them more palatable at the table. + +"Well, sir," he continued, "how do you like your new ship--how do +you like your old captain?--good fellow, isn't he?--d----n his +eyes--countryman of mine--I knew him when his father hadn't as much +money as would jingle on a tombstone. That fellow owes every thing +to me. I introduced him to the duke of ----, and he got on by that +interest; but, I say, what do you think of the Halifax girls?--nice! +a'n't they?" + +I expressed my admiration of them. + +"Ay, ay, they'll do, won't they?--we'll have some fine fun--give the +girls a party at George's Island--haymaking--green gowns--ha, ha, ha. +I say, your captain shall give us a party at Turtle Cove. We are going +to give the old commissioner a feed at the Rockingham--blow the roof +of his skull off with champagne do you dine at Birch Cove to-day? +No, I suppose you are engaged to Miss Maria, or Miss Susan, or Miss +Isabella--ha, sad dog, sad dog--done a great deal of mischief," +surveying me from head to foot. + +I took the liberty of returning him the same compliment; he was a +tall raw-boned man, with strongly marked features, and a smile on his +countenance that no modest woman could endure. In his person he gave +me the idea of a discharged life-guardsman; but from his face you +might have supposed that he had sat for one of Rubens' Satyrs. He was +one of those people with whom you become immediately acquainted; and +before I had been an hour in his company, I laughed very heartily +at his jokes--not very delicate, I own, and for which he lost a +considerable portion of my respect; but he was a source of constant +amusement to me, living as we did in the same house. + +I was just going out of the room when he stopped me--"I say, how +should you like to be introduced to some devilish nice Yankee girls, +relations of mine, from Philadelphia? and I should be obliged to you +to show them attention; very pretty girls, I can tell you, and will +have good fortunes--you may go farther and fare worse. The old dad +is as rich as a Jew--got the gout in both legs--can't hold out much +longer--nice pickings at his money bags, while the devil is picking +his bones." + +There was no withstanding such inducements, and I agreed that he +should present me the next day. + +Our dialogue was interrupted by the master of the house and his son, +who gave me a hearty welcome; the father had been a widower for some +years, and his only son Ned resided with him, and was intended to +succeed to his business as a merchant. We adjourned to dress for +dinner; our bed-rooms were contiguous, and we began to talk of Sir +Hurricane. + +"He is a strange mixture," said Ned. "I love him for his good temper; +but I owe him a grudge for making mischief between me and Maria; +besides, he talks balderdash before the ladies, and annoys them very +much." + +"I owe him a grudge too," said I, "for sending me to sea in a gale of +wind." + +"We shall both be quits with him before long," said Ned; "but let us +now go and meet him at dinner. To-morrow I will set the housekeeper +at him for his cruelty to her cat; and if I am not much mistaken, she +will pay him off for it." + +Dinner passed off extremely well. The admiral was in high spirits; and +as it was a bachelor's party, he earned his wine. The next morning we +met at breakfast. When that was over, the master of the house retired +to his office, or pretended to do so. I was going out to walk, but Ned +said I had better stay a few minutes; he had something to say to me; +in fact, he had prepared a treat without my knowing it. + +"How did you sleep last night, Sir Hurricane?" said the artful Ned. + +"Why, pretty well; considering," said the admiral, "I was not +tormented by that old tom cat. D----n me, Sir, that fellow was like +the Grand Signior, and he kept his seraglio in the garret, over my +bed-room, instead of being at his post in the kitchen, killing the +rats that are running about like coach-horses." + +"Sir Hurricane," said I, "it's always unlucky to sailors, if they +meddle with cats. You will have a gale of wind, in some shape or +another, before long." + +These words were hardly uttered, when, as if by preconcerted +arrangement, the door opened, and in sailed Mrs Jellybag, the +housekeeper, an elderly woman, somewhere in the latitude of fifty-five +or sixty years. With a low courtesy and contemptuous toss of her head, +she addressed Sir Hurricane Humbug. + +"Pray, Sir Hurricane, what have you been doing to my cat?" + +The admiral, who prided himself in putting any one who applied to +him on what he called the wrong scent, endeavoured to play off Mrs +Jellybag in the same manner. + +"What have I done to your cat, my dear Mrs Jellybag? Why, my dear +Madam" (said he, assuming an air of surprise), "what _should_ I do to +your cat?" + +"You _should_ have left him alone, Mr Admiral; that cat was my +property; if my master permits you to ill-treat the poultry, that's +his concern; but that cat was mine, Sir Hurricane--mine, every inch of +him. The animal has been ill-treated, and sits moping in the corner +of the fireplace, as if he was dying; he'll never be the cat he was +again." + +"I don't think he ever will, my dear Mrs Housekeeper," answered the +admiral, drily. + +The lady's wrath now began to kindle. The admiral's cool replies +were like water sprinkled upon a strong flame, increasing its force, +instead of checking it. + +"Don't dear _me_, Sir Hurricane. I am not one of _your dears_--_your +dears_ are all in Dutchtown--more shame for you, an old man like you." + +"Old man!" cried Sir Hurricane, losing his placidity a little. + +"Yes, old man; look at your hair--as grey as a goose's." + +"Why, as for my hair, that proves nothing, Mrs Jellybag, for though +there may be snow on the mountains, there is still heat in the +valleys. What d'ye think of my metaphor?" + +"I am no more a _metafore_ than yourself, Sir Hurricane; but I'll +tell you what, you are a _cock-and-hen_ admiral, a dog-in-the-manger +barrownight, who was jealous of my poor tom cat, because--, I won't +say what. Yes, Sir Hurricane, all hours of the day you are leering at +every young woman that passes, out of our windows--and an old man too; +you ought to be ashamed of yourself--and then you go to church of a +Sunday, and cry, 'Good Lord, deliver us.'" + +The housekeeper now advanced so close to the admiral, that her nose +nearly touched his, her arms akimbo, and every preparation for +boarding. The admiral, fearing she might not confine herself to +vocality, but begin to beat time with her fists, thought it right to +take up a position; he therefore very dexterously took two steps in +the rear, and mounted on a sofa; his left was defended by an upright +piano, his right by the breakfast-table, with all the tea-things on +it; his rear was against the wall, and his front depended on himself +in person. From this commanding eminence he now looked down on the +housekeeper, whose nose could reach no higher than the seals of +her adversary's watch; and in proportion as the baronet felt his +security, so rose his choler. Having been for many years Proctor at +the great universities of Point-street and Blue-town, as well as +member of Barbican and North Corner, he was perfectly qualified, in +point of classical dialect, to maintain the honour of his profession. +Nor was the lady by any means deficient. Although she had not taken +her degree, her tongue from constant use had acquired a fluency which +nature only concedes to practice. + +It will not be expected, nor would it be proper, that I should repeat +all that passed in this concluding scene, in which the housekeeper +gave us good reason to suppose that she was not quite so ignorant of +the nature of the transaction as she would have had us believe. + +The battle having raged for half an hour with great fury, both parties +desisted, for want of breath, and consequently of ammunition. This +produced a gradual cessation of firing, and by degrees the ships +separated--the admiral, like Lord Howe on the first of June, +preserving his position, though very much mauled; and the housekeeper, +like the Montague, _running down_ to join her associates. A few random +shots were exchanged as they parted, and at every second or third step +on the stairs, Mrs Margaret brought to, and fired, until both were +quite out of range; a distant rumbling noise was heard, and the +admiral concluded, by muttering that she might go--, somewhere, but +the word died between his teeth. + +"There, admiral," said I, "did not I tell you that you would have a +squall?" + +"Squall! yes--d----n my blood," wiping his face; "how the spray flew +from the old beldam! She's fairly wetted my trousers, by God. Who'd +ever thought that such a purring old b----h could have shown such a +set of claws!--War to the knife! By heavens, I'll make her remember +this." + +Notwithstanding the admiral's threat, hostilities ceased from that +day. The cock-and-hen admiral found it convenient to show a white +feather; interest stood in the way, and barred him from taking his +revenge. Mrs Jellybag was a faithful servant, and our host neither +liked that she should be interfered with, or that his house should +become an arena for such conflicts; and the admiral, who was +peculiarly tenacious of undrawing the strings of his purse, found it +convenient to make the first advances. The affair was, therefore, +amicably arranged--the tom cat was, in consideration of his +sufferings, created a baronet, and was ever afterwards dignified by +the title of _Sir H. Humbug_; who certainly was the most eligible +person to select for god-father, as he had taken the most effectual +means of weaning him from "the pomps and vanities of this wicked +world." + +It was now about one o'clock, for this dispute had ran away with the +best part of the morning, when Sir Hurricane said, "Come, youngster, +don't forget your engagements--you know I have got to introduce you to +my pretty cousins--you must mind your P's and Q's with the uncle, for +he is a sensible old fellow--has read a great deal, and thinks America +the first and greatest country in the world." + +We accordingly proceeded to the residence of the fair strangers, whom +the admiral assured me had come to Halifax from mere curiosity, under +the protection of their uncle and aunt. We knocked at the door, and +the admiral inquired if Mrs M'Flinn was at home; we were answered +in the affirmative. The servant asked our names. "Vice Admiral Sir +Hurricane Humbug," said I, "and Mr Mildmay." + +The drawing-room door was thrown open, and the man gave our names with +great propriety. In we walked; a tall, grave-looking, elderly lady +received us, standing bolt upright in the middle of the room; the +young ladies were seated at their work. + +"My dear Mrs M'Flinn," said the admiral, "how do you do? I am +delighted to see you and your fair nieces looking so lovely this +morning."--The lady bowed to this compliment--a courtesy she was +not quite up to--"Allow me to introduce my gallant young friend, +Mildmay--young ladies, take care of your hearts--he is a great rogue, +I assure you, though he smiles so sweet upon you." + +Mrs M'Flinn bowed again to me, hoped I was very well, and inquired +"how long I had been in these parts." + +I replied that I had just returned from a cruise, but that I was no +stranger in Halifax. + +"Come, officer," said the admiral, taking me by the arm, "I see you +are bashful--I must make you acquainted with my pretty cousins. This, +Sir, is Miss M'Flinn--her Christian name is Deliverance. She is a +young lady whose beauty is her least recommendation." + +"A very equivocal compliment," thought I. + +"This, Sir, is Miss Jemima; this is Miss Temperance; and this is Miss +Deborah. Now that you know them all by name, and they know you, I hope +you will contrive to make yourself both useful and agreeable." + +"A very pretty sinecure," thinks I to myself, "just as if I had not my +hands full already." However, as I never wanted small talk for pretty +faces, I began with Jemima. They were all pretty, but she was a +love--yet there was an awkwardness about them that convinced me they +were not of the _bon ton_ of Philadelphia. The answers to all +my questions were quick, pert, and given with an air of assumed +consequence; at the same time I observed a mode of expression which, +though English, was not well-bred English. + +"Did you come through the United States," said I, "into the British +territory, or did you come by water?" + +"Oh, by water," screamed all the girls at once, "and _liked_ to have +been eaten up with the nasty roaches." + +I did not exactly know what was meant by "roaches," but it was +explained to me soon after. I inquired whether they had seen a British +man-of-war, and whether they would like to accompany me on board of +that which I belonged to? They all screamed out at same moment-- + +"No, we never have seen one, and should like to see it of all things. +When will you take us?" + +"To-morrow," said I, "if the day should prove fine." + +Here the admiral, who had been making by-play with the old chaperon, +turned round, and said: + +"Well, Mr Frank, I see you are getting on pretty well without my +assistance." + +"Oh, we all like him very much," said Temperance; "and he says he will +take us on board his ship." + +"Softly, my dear," said the aunt: "we must not think of giving the +gentleman the trouble, until we are better acquainted." + +"I am sure, aunt," said Deborah, "we are very well acquainted." + +"Then," said the aunt, seeing she was in the minority, "suppose you +and Sir Hurricane come and breakfast with us to-morrow morning at +eleven o'clock, after which, we shall all be very much at your +service." + +Here the admiral looked at me with one of his impudent leers, and +burst into a loud laugh; but I commanded my countenance very well, and +rebuked him by a steady and reserved look. + +"I shall have great pleasure," said I, to the lady, "in obeying your +orders from eleven to-morrow morning, till the hour of dinner, when I +am engaged." + +So saying, we both bowed, wished them a good morning, and left the +room. The door closed upon us, and I heard them all exclaim--"What a +charming young man!" + +I went on board, and told the first lieutenant what I had done; he, +very good-naturedly, said he would do his best, though the ship was +not in order for showing, and would have a boat ready for us at the +dock-yard stairs at one o'clock the next day. + +I went to breakfast at the appointed hour. The admiral did not appear, +but the ladies were all in readiness, and I was introduced to their +uncle--a plain, civil-spoken man, with a strong nasal twang. The +repast was very good; and as I had a great deal of work before me, +I made hay while the sun shone. When the rage of hunger had been a +little appeased, I made use of the first belle to inquire if a lady +whom I once had the honour of knowing, was any relation of theirs, as +she bore the same name, and came, like them, from Philadelphia. + +"Oh, dear, yes, indeed, she is a relation," said all the ladies +together; "we have not seen her this seven years, when did you see her +last?" + +I replied that we had not met for some time; but that the last time I +had heard of her, she was seen by a friend of mine at Turin on the Po. +The last syllable was no sooner out of my mouth, than tea, coffee, and +chocolate was out of theirs, all spirting different ways, just like so +many young grampuses. They jumped up from the table and ran away to +their rooms, convulsed with laughter, leaving me alone with their +uncle. I was all amazement, and I own felt a little annoyed. + +I asked if I had made any serious lapsus, or said any thing very +ridiculous or indelicate; if I had, I said I should never forgive +myself. + +"Sir," said Mr M'Flinn, "I am very sure you meant nothing indelicate; +but the refined society of Philadelphia, in which these young ladies +have been educated, attaches very different meanings to certain words, +to what you do in the old country. The back settlements, for instance, +so called by our ancestors, we call the western settlements, and we +apply the same term, by analogy, to the human figure and dress. This +is a mere little explanation, which you will take as it is meant. It +cannot be expected that '_foreigners_' should understand the niceties +of our language." + +I begged pardon for my ignorance; and assured him I would be more +cautious in future. "But pray tell me," said I, "what there was in my +last observation which could have caused so much mirth at my expense?" + +"Why, Sir," said Mr M'Flinn, "you run me hard there; but since +you force me to explain myself, I must say that you used a word +exclusively confined to bedchambers." + +"But surely, Sir," said I, "you will allow that the name of a +celebrated river, renowned in the most ancient of our histories, is +not to be changed from such a refined notion of false delicacy?" + +"There you are wrong," said Mr M'Flinn. "The French, who are our +instructors in every thing, teach us how to name all these things; and +I think you will allow that they understand true politeness." + +I bowed to this dictum, only observing, that there was a point in our +language where delicacy became indelicate; that I thought the noble +river had a priority of claim over a contemptible vessel; and, +reverting to the former part of his discourse, I said that we in +England were not ashamed to call things by their proper names; and +that we considered it a great mark of ill-breeding to go round about +for a substitute to a common word, the vulgar import of which a well +bred and modest woman ought never to have known. + +The old gentleman felt a little abashed at this rebuke, and, to +relieve him, I changed the subject, hoping that the ladies would +forgive me for this once, and return to their breakfasts. + +"Why, as for that matter," said the gentleman, "the Philadelphia +ladies have very delicate appetites, and I dare say they have had +enough." + +Finding I was not likely to gain ground on that tack, I steered my +own course, and finished my breakfast, comforting myself that much +execution had been done by the ladies on the commissariat department, +before the "Po" had made its appearance. + +By the time I had finished, the ladies had composed themselves; and +the pretty Jemima had recovered the saint-like gravity of her lovely +mouth. Decked in shawls and bonnets, they expressed much impatience to +be gone. We walked to the dock-yard, where a boat with a midshipman +attended, and in a few minutes conveyed us alongside of my ship. +A painted cask, shaped like a chair, with, a whip from the main +yard-arm, was let down into the boat; and I carefully packed the fair +creatures, two at a time, and sent them up. There was a good deal of +giggling, and screaming, and loud laughing, which rather annoyed me; +for as they were not my friends, I had no wish that my messmates +should think they belonged to that set in Halifax in which I was so +kindly received. + +At length, all were safely landed on the quarter-deck, without the +exposure of an ancle, which they all seemed to dread. Whether their +ancles were not quite so small as Mr M'Flinn wished me to suppose +their appetites were, I cannot say. + +"La! aunt," said Deborah, "when I looked up in the air, and saw you +and Deliverance dangling over our heads, I thought if the rope was to +break, what a 'squash' you would have come on us: I am sure you would +have _paunched us_." + +Determined to have the Philadelphia version of this elegant phrase, I +inquired what it meant, and was informed, that in their country when +any one had his bowels _squeezed_ out, they called it "_paunching_." + +"Well," thought I, "after this, you might swallow the Po without +spoiling your breakfasts." The band struck up "Yankee Doodle," the +ladies were in ecstacy, and began to caper round the quarter-deck. + +"La! Jemima," said Deborah, "what have you done to the western side of +your gown? it is all over white." + +This was soon brushed off, but the expression was never forgotten in +the ship, and always ludicrously applied. + +Having shown them the ship and all its wonders, I was glad to conduct +them back to the shore. When I met the admiral, I told him I had done +the honours, and hoped the next time he had any female relatives, he +would keep his engagements, and attend to them himself. + +"Why, now, who do you think they are?" said the admiral. + +"Think!" said I, "why, who should they be but your Yankee cousins?" + +"Why, was you such a d----d flat as to believe what I said, eh? Why, +their father keeps a shop of all sorts at Philadelphia, and they were +going to New York, on a visit to some of their relatives, when the +ship they were in was taken and brought in here." + +"Then," said I, "these are not the bon-ton of Philadelphia?" + +"Just as much as Nancy Dennis is the bon-ton of Halifax," said the +admiral; "though the uncle, as I told you, is a sensible fellow in his +way." + +"Very well," said I; "you have caught me for once; but remember, I pay +you for it." + +And I was not long in his debt. Had he not given me this explanation, +I should have received a very false impression of the ladies of +Philadelphia, and have done them an injustice for which I should never +have forgiven myself. + +The time of our sailing drew near. This was always a melancholy time +in Halifax; but my last act on shore was one which created some mirth, +and enlivened the gloom of my departure. My friend Ned and myself had +not yet had an opportunity of paying off Sir Hurricane Humbug for +telling tales to Maria, and for his false introduction to myself. One +morning we both came out of our rooms at the same moment, and were +proceeding to the breakfast parlour, when we spied the admiral +performing some experiment. Unfortunately for him, he was seated in +such a manner, just clear of a pent-house, as to be visible from our +position; and at the same time, the collar of his coat would exactly +intersect the segment of a circle described by any fluid, projected by +us over this low roof, which would thus act as a conductor into the +very pole of his neck. + +The housemaid (these housemaids are always the cause or the +instruments of mischief, either by design or neglect), had left +standing near the window a pail nearly filled with dirty water, from +the wash-hand basins, &c. Ned and I looked at each other, then at the +pail, then at the admiral. Ned thought of his Maria: I of my false +introduction. Without saying a word, we both laid our hands on the +pail, and in an instant, souse went all the contents over the admiral. + +"I say, what's this?" he roared out. "Oh, you d----d rascals!" + +He knew it could only be us. We laughed so immoderately, that we +had not the power to move or to speak; while the poor admiral was +spitting, sputtering, and coughing, enough to bring his heart up. + +"You infernal villains! No respect for a flag-officer? I'll serve you +out for this." + +The tears rolled down our cheeks; but not with grief. As soon as +the admiral had sufficiently recovered himself to go in pursuit, we +thought it time to make sail. We knew we were discovered; and as the +matter could not be made worse, we resolved to tell him what it was +for. Ned began. + +"How do you do, admiral? you have taken a shower-bath this morning." + +He looked up, with his teeth clenched--"Oh, it's you, is it? Yes, I +thought it could be no one else. Yes, I have had a shower-bath, and be +d----d to you; and that sea-devil of a friend of yours. Pretty pass +the service has come to, when officers of my rank are treated in this +way. I'll make you both envy the tom-cat." + +"Beware the housekeeper, admiral," said Ned. "Maria has made it up +with me, admiral, and she sends her love to you." + +"D----n Maria." + +"Oh, very well, I'll tell her so," said Ned. + +"Admiral," said I, "do you remember when you sent the --- to sea in a +gale of wind, when I was midshipman of her? Well, I got just as wet +that night as you are now. Pray, admiral, have you any commands to the +Misses M'Flinn?" + +"I'll tell you when I catch hold of you," said Sir Hurricane, as he +moved up stairs to his room, dripping like Pope's Lodona, only not +smelling so sweet. + +Hearing a noise, the housekeeper came up, and all the family assembled +to condole with the humid admiral, but each enjoying the joke as much +as ourselves. We however paid rather dearly for it. The admiral swore +that neither of us should eat or drink in the house for three days; +and Ned's father, though ready to burst with laughter, was forced in +common decency to say that he thought the admiral perfectly right +after so gross a violation of hospitality. + +I went and dined on board my ship, Ned went to a coffee-house; but +on the third morning after the shower, I popped my head into the +breakfast parlour, and said, + +"Admiral, I have a good story to tell you, if you will let me come +in." + +"I'd see you d----d first, you young scum of a fish pond. Be off, or +I'll shy the ham at your head." + +"No, but indeed, my dear Admiral, it is such a nice story; it is one +just to your fancy." + +"Well then, stand there and tell it, but don't come in, for if you +do--" + +I stood at the door and told him the story. + +"Well, now," said he, "that is a good story, and I will forgive you +for it." So with a hearty laugh at my ingenuity, he promised to +forgive us both, and I ran and fetched Ned to breakfast. + +This was the safest mode we could have adopted to get into favour, for +the admiral was a powerful, gigantic fellow, that could have given us +some very awkward squeezes. The peace was very honourably kept, and +the next day the ship sailed. + + + + +Chapter XXV + + They turned into a long and wide street, in which not a single + living figure appeared to break the perspective. Solitude is never + so overpowering as when it exists among the works of man. In old + woods, or on the tops of mountains, it is graceful and benignant, + for it is at home; but where thick dwellings are, it wears a + ghost-like aspect.--INESILLA. + + +We were ordered to look out for the American squadron that had done so +much mischief to our trade; and directed our course, for this purpose, +to the coast of Africa. We had been out about ten days, when a vessel +was seen from the mast-head. We were at that time within about one +hundred and eighty leagues of the Cape de Verd Islands. We set all +sail in chase, and soon made her out to be a large frigate, who seemed +to have no objection to the meeting, but evidently tried her rate of +sailing with us occasionally: her behaviour left us no doubt that she +was an American frigate, and we cleared for action. + +The captain, I believe, had never been in a sea fight, or if he had, +he had entirely forgotten all he had learned; for which reason, in +order to refresh his memory, he laid upon the capstan-head, the famous +epitome of John Hamilton Moore, now obsolete, but held at that time to +be one of the most luminous authors who had ever treated on maritime +affairs. John, who certainly gives a great deal of advice on every +subject, has, amongst other valuable directions, told us how to bring +a ship into action, according to the best and most approved methods, +and how to take your enemy afterwards, if you can. But the said John +must have thought red hot shot could be heated by a process somewhat +similar to that by which he heated his own nose, or he must entirely +have forgotten "the manners and customs in such cases used at sea," +for he recommends, as a prelude or first course to the entertainment, +a good dose of red hot shot, served up the moment the guests are +assembled; but does not tell us where the said dishes are to +be cooked. No doubt whatever that a broadside composed of such +ingredients, would be a great desideratum in favour of a victory, +especially if the enemy should happen to have none of his own to give +in return. + +So thought his lordship, who walking up to the first lieutenant, said, + +"Mr Thingamay, don't you think red hot what-do-ye-call-ums should be +given in the first broadside to that thingumbob?" + +"Red hot shot, do you mean, my lord?" + +"Yes," said his lordship; "don't you think they would settle his +hash?" + +"Where the devil are we to get them, my lord?" said the first +lieutenant, who was not the same that wanted to fight me for saying he +was as clever a fellow as the captain: that man had been unshipped by +the machinations of Toady. + +"Very true," said his lordship. + +We now approached the stranger very fast, when, to our great +mortification, she proved to be an English frigate; she made the +private signal, it was answered; showed her number, we showed ours, +and her captain being junior officer came on board, to pay his +respects and show his order. He was three weeks from England, brought +news of a peace with France, and, among other treats, a navy list, +which, next to a bottle of London porter, is the greatest luxury to a +sea officer in a foreign climate. + +Greedily did we all run over this interesting little book, and among +the names of the new made commanders, I was overjoyed to find my own; +the last on the list to be sure, but that I cared not for. I received +the congratulations of my messmates; we parted company with the +stranger, and steered for the island of St Jago, our captain intending +to complete his water in Port Praya Bay, previous to a long cruise +after the American squadron. + +We found here a slave vessel in charge of a naval officer, bound to +England; and I thought this a good opportunity to quit, not being over +anxious to serve as a lieutenant when I knew I was a commander. I was +also particularly anxious to return to England for many reasons, +the hand of my dear Emily standing at the head of them. I therefore +requested the captain's permission to quit the ship; and as he wished +to give an acting order to one of his own followers, he consented. I +took my leave of all my messmates, and of my captain, who, though an +unfeeling coxcomb and no sailor, certainly had some good points about +him: in fact, his lordship was a gentleman; and had his ship fallen +in with an enemy, she would have been well fought, as he had good +officers, was sufficiently aware of his own incapability, would take +advice, and as a man of undaunted bravery, was not to be surpassed in +the service. + +On the third day after our arrival, the frigate sailed. I went on +board the slaver, which had no slaves on board except four to assist +in working the vessel; she was in a filthy state, and there was no +inn on shore, and of course no remedy. Port Praya is the only good +anchorage in the island; the old town of St Jago was deserted, in +consequence of there being only an open roadstead before it, very +unsafe for vessels to lie in. The town of Port Praya is a miserable +assemblage of mud huts; the governor's house, and one more, are better +built, but they are not so comfortable as a cottage in England. There +were not ten Portuguese on the island, and above ten thousand blacks, +all originally slaves; and yet every thing was peaceable, although +fresh arrivals of slaves came every day. + +It was easy to distinguish the different races: the Yatoffes are tall +men, not very stoutly built; most of them are soldiers. I have seen +ten of them standing together, the lowest not less than six feet two +or three inches. The Foulahs, from the Ashantee country, are another +race, they are powerful and muscular, ill-featured, badly disposed, +and treacherous. The Mandingoes are a smaller race than the others, +but they are well disposed and tractable. + +The island of slaves is kept in subjection by slaves only, who are +enrolled as soldiers, miserably equipped; a cap and a jacket was all +they owed to art, nature provided the rest of their uniform. The +governor's orderly alone sported a pair of trousers, and these were on +permanent duty, being transferred from one to the other as their turn +for that service came on. + +I paid my respects to the governor, who, although a Portuguese, chose +to follow the fashion of the island, and was as black as most of his +subjects. After a few French compliments, I took my leave. I was +curious to see the old town of St Jago, which had been abandoned; and +after a hot walk of two hours over uncultivated ground, covered with +fine goats, which are the staple of the island, I reached the desolate +spot. + +It was melancholy to behold: it seemed as if the human race were +extinct. The town was built on a wide ravine running down to the sea; +the houses were of stone, and handsome; the streets regular and paved, +which proves that it had formerly been a place of some importance; but +it is surprising that a spot so barren as this island generally is +should ever have had any mercantile prosperity. Whatever it did enjoy, +I should conceive must have been anterior to the Portuguese having +sailed round the Cape of Good Hope; and the solidity and even elegance +of construction among the buildings justifies the supposition. + +The walls were massive, and remained entire; the churches were +numerous, but the roofs of them and the dwelling-houses had mostly +fallen in. Trees had grown to a considerable height in the midst of +the streets, piercing through the pavements and raising the stones +on each side; and the convent gardens were a mere wilderness. The +cocoa-nut tree had thrust its head through many a roof, and its long +stems through the tops of the houses; the banana luxuriated out of +the windows. The only inhabitants of a town capable of containing ten +thousand inhabitants, were a few friars who resided in a miserable +ruin which had once been a beautiful convent. They were the first +negro friars I had ever seen; their cowls were as black as their +faces, and their hair grey and woolly. I concluded they had adopted +this mode of life as being the laziest; but I could not discover by +what means they could gain a livelihood, for there were none to give +them anything in charity. + +The appearance of these poor men added infinitely to the necromantic +character of the whole melancholy scene. There was a beauty, a +loveliness, in these venerable ruins, which delighted me. There was a +solemn silence in the town; but there was a small, still voice, that +said to me: "London may one day be the same--and Paris; and you and +your children's children will all have lived and had their loves and +adventures; but who will the wretched man be, that shall sit on the +summit of Primrose Hill, and look down upon the desolation of the +mighty city, as I, from this little eminence, behold the once +flourishing town of St Jago?" + +The goats were browsing on the side of the hill, and the little kids +frisking by their dams. "These," thought I, "perhaps are the only food +and nourishment of these poor friars." I walked to Port Praya, and +returned to my floating prison, the slave ship. The officer who was +conducting her home, as a prize, was not a pleasant man; I did not +like him: and nothing passed between us but common civility. He was an +old master's mate, who had probably served his time thrice over; but +having no merit of his own, and no friends to cause that defect to be +overlooked, he had never obtained promotion: he therefore naturally +looked on a young commander with envy. He had only given me a passage +home, from motives which he could not resist; first, because he was +forced to obey the orders of my late captain; and, secondly, +because my purse would supply the cabin with the necessary stock of +refreshments, in the shape of fruit, poultry, and vegetables, which +are to be procured at Port Praya; he was therefore under the necessity +of enduring my company. + +The vessel, I found, was not to sail on the following day, as he +intended. I therefore took my gun, at daybreak, and wandered with a +guide up the valleys, in search of the pintados, or Guinea fowl, with +which the island abounds; but they were so shy that I never could get +a shot at them; and I returned over the hills, which my guide assured +me was the shortest way. Tired with my walk, I was not sorry to arrive +at a sheltered valley, where the palmetto and the plantain offer +a friendly shade from the burning sun. The guide, with wonderful +agility, mounted the cocoa-nut tree, and threw down half a dozen nuts. +They were green, and their milk I thought the most refreshing and +delicious draught I had ever taken. + +The vesper bells at Port Praya were now summoning the poor black +friars to their devotion; and a stir and bustle appeared among the +little black boys and girls, of whose presence I was till then +ignorant. They ran from the coverts, and assembled near the front of +the only cottage visible to my eye. A tall elderly negro man came out, +and took his seat on a mound of turf a few feet from the cottage; he +was followed by a lad, about twenty years of age, who bore in his +hand a formidable cowskin. For the information of my readers, I must +observe that a cowskin is a large whip, made like a riding whip, out +of the hide of the hippopotamus, or sea-cow, and is proverbial for +the severity of punishment it is capable of inflicting. After the +executioner came, with slow and measured steps, the poor little +culprits, five boys and three girls, who, with most rueful faces, +ranged themselves, rank and file, before the old man. + +I soon perceived that the hands were turned up for punishment; but the +nature of the offence I had yet to learn: nor did I know whether any +order had been given to strip. With the boys this would have been +supererogatory, as they were quite naked. The female children had on +cotton chemises, which they slowly and reluctantly rolled up, until +they had gathered them close under their armpits. + +The old man then ordered the eldest boy to begin his Pater Noster; +and simultaneously the whipper-in elevated his cowskin by way of +encouragement. The poor boy watched it, out of the corner of his eye, +and then began "Pattery nobstur, qui, qui, qui--(here he received a +most severe lash from the cowskin bearer)--is in silly," roared the +boy, as if the continuation had been expelled from his mouth by the +application of external force in an opposite direction--"sancty +fisheter nom tum, adveny regnum tum, fi notun tas, ta, ti, tu, +terror," roared the poor fellow, as he saw the lash descending on his +defenceless back-- + +"Terror indeed," thought I. + +"Pannum nossum quotditty hamminum da nobs holyday, e missy nobs +debitty nossa si cut nos demittimissibus debetenibas nossimus e, +ne, nos hem-duckam in, in, in temptationemum, sed lillibery nos a +ma--ma--" Here a heavy lash brought the very Oh! that was "caret" to +complete the sentence. + +My readers are not to suppose that the rest of the class acquitted +themselves with as much ability as their leader, who, compared to +them, was perfectly erudite; the others received a lash for every +word, or nearly so. The boys were first disposed of, in order, I +suppose, that they might have the full benefit of the applicant's +muscles; while the poor girls had the additional pleasure of +witnessing the castigation until their turn came; and that they +were aware of what awaited them was evident, from their previous +arrangement and disposition of dress, at the commencement of the +entertainment. The girls accordingly came up one after another to say +their Ave Maria, as more consonant to their sex; but I could scarcely +contain my rage when the rascally cowskin was applied to them, or my +laughter when, smarting under its lash, they exclaimed, "Benedicta +Mulieribus," applying their little hands with immoderate pressure to +the afflicted part. + +I could have found in my heart to have wrested the whip out of the +hands of the young negro, and applied it with all my might to him, and +his old villain of a master, and father of these poor children, as I +soon found he was. My patience was almost gone when the second girl +received a lash for her "Plena Gratia." She screamed, and danced, and +lifted up her poor legs in agony, rubbing herself on her "_west_" +side, as the Philadelphia ladies call it, with as much assiduity as if +it had been one of those cases in which friction is prescribed by the +faculty. + +But the climax was yet to come. A grand stage effect was to be +produced before the falling of the curtain. The youngest girl was so +defective in her lesson, that not one word of it could be extracted +from her, even by the cowskin; nothing but piercing shrieks, enough +to make my heart bleed, could the poor victim utter. Irritated at +the child's want of capacity to repeat by rote what she could not +understand, the old man darted from his seat, and struck her senseless +to the ground. + +I could bear no more. My first impulse was to wrest the cowskin from +the negro's hand, and revenge the poor bleeding child as she lay +motionless on the ground; but a moment's reflection convinced me that +such a step would only have brought down a double weight of punishment +on the victims when I was gone; so, catching up my hat, I turned away +with disgust, and walked slowly towards the town and bay of Port +Praya, reflecting as I went along what pleasant ideas the poor +creatures must entertain of religion, when the name of God and of the +cowskin were invariably associated in their minds. I began to parody +one of Watts's hymns-- + + "Lord! how delightful 'tis to see + A whole assembly worship thee." + +The indignation I felt against this barbarous and ignorant negro was +not unmingled with some painful recollections of my own younger days, +when, in a Christian and protestant country, the bible and prayer-book +had been made objects of terror to my mind; tasks, greater than +my capacity could compass, and floggings in proportion were not +calculated to forward the cause of religious instruction in the mind +of an obstinate boy. + +Reaching the water-side, I embarked on board of my slaver; and the +next day sailed for England. We had a favourable passage until we +reached the chops of the channel, when a gale of wind from the +north-east caught us, and drove us down so far to the southward that +the prize master found himself under the necessity of putting into +Bordeaux to refit, and to replenish his water. + +I was not sorry for this, as I was tired of the company of this +officer, who was both illiterate and ill-natured, neither a sailor nor +a gentleman. Like many others in the service, who are most loud in +their complaints for want of promotion, I considered that even in his +present rank he was what we called a _king's hard bargain_--that is, +not worth his salt; and promoting men of his stamp would only have +been picking the pocket of the country. As soon, therefore, as we +had anchored in the Gironde, off the city of Bordeaux, and had been +visited by the proper authorities, I quitted the vessel and her +captain, and went on shore. + +Taking up my abode at the Hôtel d'Angleterre, my first care was to +order a good dinner; and having despatched that, and a bottle of Vin +de Beaune (which, by the by, I strongly recommend to all travellers, +if they can get it, for I am no bad judge), I asked my _valet de +place_ how I was to dispose of myself for the remainder of the +evening? + +"_Mais, monsieur_," said he, "_il faut aller au spectacle_?" + +"_Allons_," said I, and in a few minutes I was seated in the stage-box +of the handsomest theatre in the world. + +What strange events--what unexpected meetings and sudden separations +are sailors liable to--what sudden transitions from grief to joy, from +joy to grief, from want to affluence, from affluence to want! All +this the history of my life, for the last six months, will fully +illustrate. + + + + +Chapter XXVI + + You will proceed in pleasure and in pride, + Beloved, and loving many; all is o'er + For me on earth, except some years to hide + My shame and sorrow deep in my heart's core. + + _Don Juan_. + + +I paid little attention to the performance; for the moment I came to +the house, my eyes were rivetted on an object from which I found it +impossible to remove them. "It is," said I, "and yet it cannot be; and +yet why should it not?" A young lady sat in one of the boxes; she was +elegantly attired, and seemed to occupy the united attentions of many +Frenchmen, who eagerly caught her smiles. + +"Either that is Eugenia," thought I, "or I have fallen asleep in the +ruins of St Jago, and am dreaming of her. That is Eugenia, or I am +not Frank. It is her, or it is her ghost." Still I had not that moral +certainty of the identity, as to enable me to go at once to her, and +address her. Indeed, had I been certain, all things considered, the +situation we were in would have rendered such a step highly improper. + +"If that be Eugenia," thought I, again, "she has improved both in +manner and person. She has a becoming _embonpoint_, and an air _de bon +societé_ which, when we parted, she had not." + +The more intensely I gazed, the more convinced was I that I was right; +the immovable devotion of my eyes attracted the attention of a French +officer, who sat near me. + +"_C'est une jolie femme, n'est-ce pas, monsieur_?" + +"_Vraiment_" said I. "Do you know her name?" + +"_Elle s'appelle Madame de Rosenberg_." + +"Then I am wrong, after all," said I to myself. "Has she a husband, +Sir?" + +"_Pardonnez-moi, elle est veuve, mais elle a un petit garçon de cinq +ans, beau comme un ange_." + +"That is her," said I again, reviving. "Is she a Frenchwoman?" + +"_Du tout, Monsieur, elle est une de vos compatriottes; c'est un fort +joli exemplaire_." + +She had only been three months at Bordeaux, and had refused many very +good offers in marriage. Such was the information I obtained from my +obliging neighbour; and I was now convinced that Madame de Rosenberg +could be no other than Eugenia. Every endeavour to catch her eye +proved abortive. My only hope was to follow the carriage. + +When the play was over, I waited with an impatience like that of a +spirited hunter who hears the hounds. At last, the infernal squalling +of the vocalists ceased, but not before I had devoutly wished that +all the wax candles in the house were down their throats and burning +there. I saw one of the gentlemen in the box placing the shawl over +her shoulders, with the most careful attention, while the bystanders +seemed ready to tear him in pieces, from envy. I hurried to the door, +and saw her handed into her carriage, which drove off at a great pace. +I ran after it, jumped up behind, and took my station by the side of +the footman. + +"_Descendez donc, Monsieur_," said the man. + +"I'll be d----d if I do," said I. + +"_Comment donc_?" said the man. + +"_Tais-toi bête_" said I, "_ou je te brulerai la cervelle_." + +"_Vous f----e_," said the man, who behaved very well, and instantly +began to remove me, _vi et armis_; but I planted a stomacher in his +fifth button, which I knew would put him _hors de combat_ for a few +minutes, and by that time, at the rate the carriage was driving, my +purpose would have been answered. The fellow lost his breath--could +not hold on or speak--so tumbled off and lay in the middle of the +road. + +As he fell on dry ground and was not an English sailor, I did not jump +after him, but left him to his own ease, and we saw no more of him, +for we were going ten knots, while he lay becalmed without a breath of +wind. This was one of the most successful acts of usurpation recorded +in modern history. It has its parallels, I know; but I cannot now stop +to comment on them, or on my own folly and precipitation. I was as +firmly fixed behind the carriage, as Bonaparte was on the throne of +France after the battle of Eylau. + +We stopped at a large _porte cochère_, being the entrance to a very +grand house, with lamps at the door, within a spacious court yard; +we drove in and drew up. I was down in a moment, opened the carriage +door, and let down the steps. The lady descended, laid her hand on my +arm without perceiving that she had changed her footman, and tripped +lightly up the stairs. I followed her into a handsome saloon, where +another servant in livery had placed lights on the table. She turned +round, saw me, and fainted in my arms. + +It was, indeed, Eugenia, herself; and with all due respect to my +dear Emily, I borrowed a thousand kisses while she lay in a state of +torpor, in a fauteuil to which I carried her. It was some few minutes +before she opened her eyes; the man-servant, who had brought the +lights, very properly never quitted the room, but was perfectly +respectful in his manner, rightly conceiving that I had some authority +for my proceedings. + +"My dearest Frank," said Eugenia, "what an unexpected meeting! What, +in the name of fortune, could have brought you here?" + +"That," said I, "is a story too long, Eugenia, for a moment so +interesting as this. I also might ask you the same question; but it is +now one o'clock in the morning, and, therefore, too late to begin with +inquiry. This one question, however, I must ask--are you a mother?" + +"I am," said Eugenia, "of the most lovely boy that ever blessed the +eyes of a parent; he is now in perfect health and fast asleep--come +to-morrow, at ten o'clock, and you shall see him." + +"To-morrow," said I, with surprise, "to-morrow, Eugenia? why am I to +quit your house?" + +"That also you shall know, to-morrow," said she; "but now you must do +as you are desired. To-morrow, I will be at home to no one but you." + +Knowing Eugenia as I did, it was sufficient that she had decided. +There was no appeal; so, kissing her again, I wished her a good night, +quitted her, and retired to my hotel. What a night of tumult did I +pass! I was tossed from Emily to Eugenia, like a shuttlecock between +two battledores. The latter never looked so lovely; and to the natural +loveliness of her person, was added a grace and a polish, which gave +a lustre to her charms, which almost served Emily as I had served the +footman. I never once closed my eyes during the night--dressed early +the next morning, walked about, looked at Château Trompette and the +Roman ruins--thought the hour of ten would never strike, and when it +did, I struck the same moment at her door. + +The man who opened it to me was the same whom I had treated so ill the +night before; the moment he saw me, he put himself into an attitude at +once of attack, defence, remonstrance, and revenge, all connected with +the affair of the preceding evening. + +"_Ah, ah, vous voilà donc! ce n'étoit pas bienfait, Monsieur_." + +"_Oui_," said I, "_très nettement fait, et voilà encore_," slipping a +Napoleon into his hand. + +"_Ca s'arrange très-joliment, Monsieur_," said the man, grinning from +ear to ear, and bowing to the ground. + +"_C'est Madame, que vous voulez donc_?" + +"_Oui_," said I. + +He led, I followed; he opened the door of a breakfast +parlour--"_tenez, Madame, voici le Monsieur que m'a renversé hier au +soi_." + +Eugenia was seated on a sofa, with her boy by her side, the loveliest +little fellow I had ever beheld. His face was one often described, +but rarely seen; it was shaded with dark curling ringlets, his mouth, +eyes, and complexion had much of his mother, and, vanity whispered me, +much more of myself. I took a seat on the sofa, and with the boy on my +knee, and Eugenia by my side, held her hand, while she narrated the +events of her life since the time of our separation. + +"A few days," said she, "after your departure for the Flushing +expedition, I read in the public prints, that 'if the nearest relation +of my mother would call at ----, in London, they would hear of +something to their advantage.' I wrote to the agent, from whom I +learned, after proving my identity, that the two sisters of my mother, +who, you may remember, had like sums left them by the will of their +relative, had continued to live in a state of single blessedness; +that, about four years previous, one of them had died, leaving every +thing to the other, and that the other had died only two months +before, bequeathing all her property to my mother, or her next heir; +or, in default of that, to some distant relation. I, therefore, +immediately came into a fortune of ten thousand pounds, with interest; +and I was further informed that a great-uncle of mine was still +living, without heirs, and was most anxious that my mother or her +heirs should be discovered. An invitation was therefore sent to me to +go down to him, and to make his house my future residence. + +"At that time, the effects of my indiscretion were but too apparent, +and rendered, as I thought, deception justifiable. I put on widow's +weeds, and gave out that my husband was a young officer, who had +fallen a victim to the fatal Walcheren fever; that our marriage had +been clandestine, and unknown to any of his friends: such was my story +and appearance before the agent, who believed me. The same fabrication +was put upon my grand-uncle, with equal success. I was received into +his house with parental affection; and in that house I gave birth to +the dear child you now hold in your arms--to your child, my Frank--to +the only child I shall ever have. Yes, dear Eugenio," continued she, +pressing her rosy lips on the broad white neck of the child, "you +shall be my only care, my solace, my comfort, and my joy. Heaven, +in its mercy, sent the cherub to console its wretched mother in the +double pangs of guilt and separation from all she loved; and Heaven +shall be repaid, by my return to its slighted, its insulted laws. I +feel that my sin is forgiven; for I have besought forgiveness night +and day, with bitter tears, and Heaven has heard my prayer. 'Go, and +sin no more,' was said to me; and upon these terms I have received +forgiveness. + +"You will no doubt ask, why did I not let you know all this? and why I +so carefully secreted myself from you? My reasons were founded on the +known impetuosity of your character. You, my beloved, who could brave +death, and all the military consequences of desertion from a ship +lying at Spithead, were not likely to listen to the suggestions of +prudence when Eugenia was to be found; and, having once given out that +I was a widow, I resolved to preserve the consistency of my character +for my own sake--for your sake, and for the sake of this blessed +child, the only drop that has sweetened my cup of affliction. Had you +by any means discovered my place of abode, the peace of my uncle's +house, and the prospects of my child had been for ever blasted. + +"Now then say, Frank, have I, or have I not, acted the part of a Roman +mother? My grand-uncle having declared his intention of making me heir +to his property, for his sake, and yours, and for my child, I have +preserved the strict line of duty, from which God, in his infinite +mercy, grant that I may never depart. + +"I first resolved upon not seeing you until I could be more my own +mistress; and when, at the death of my respected relative, I was not +only released from any restraint on account of his feelings, but +also became still more independent in my circumstances, you might +be surprised that I did not immediately impart to you the change of +fortune which would have enabled us to have enjoyed the comfort of +unrestricted communication. But time, reflection, the conversation and +society of my uncle and his select friends, the care of my infant, and +the reading of many excellent books had wrought a great change in my +sentiments. Having once tasted the pleasures of society among virtuous +women, I vowed to Heaven that no future act of mine should ever drive +me from it. The past could not be recalled; but the future was my own. + +"I took the sacrament after a long and serious course of reading; +and, having made my vows at the altar, with the help of God, they are +unchangeable. Dramatic works, the pernicious study and poison of my +youthful ardent mind, I have long since discarded; and I had resolved +never to see you again, until after your marriage with Miss Somerville +had been solemnised. Start not! By the simplest and easiest means +I have known all your movements--your dangers, your escapes, your +undaunted acts of bravery and self-devotion for the sake of others. + +"'Shall I then,' said I to myself, 'blast the prospects of the man +I love--the father of my boy? Shall I, to gratify the poor, pitiful +ambition of becoming the wife of him, to whom I once was the mistress, +sacrifice thus the hopes and fortune of himself and family, the reward +of a virtuous maiden?' In all this I hope you will perceive a proper +share of self-denial. Many, many floods of bitter tears of repentance +and regret have I shed over my past conduct; and I trust, that what +I have suffered and what I shall suffer, will be received as my +atonement at the Throne of Grace. True, I once looked forward to the +happy period of our union, when I might have offered myself to you, +not as a portionless bride; but I was checked by one maddening, +burning, inextingishable thought. I could not be received into that +society to which you were entitled. I felt that I loved you, Frank; +loved you too well to betray you. The woman that had so little respect +for herself, was unfit to be the wife of Francis Mildmay. + +"Besides, how could I do my sweet boy the injustice to allow him to +have brothers and sisters possessing legitimate advantages over him? +I felt that our union never could be one of happiness, even if you +consented to take me as your wife, of which I had my doubts; and when +I discovered, through my emissaries, that you were on the point of +marriage with Miss Somerville, I felt that it was all for the best; +that I had no right to complain; the more so as it was I who (I blush +to say it) had seduced you. + +"But, Frank, if I cannot be your wife--and alas! I know too well that +that is impossible--will you allow me to be your friend, your dear +friend, as the mother of your child, or, if you please, as your +sister? But there the sacred line is drawn; it is a compact between +my God and myself. You know my firmness and decision; once maturely +deliberated, my resolution formed, it is not, I think, in man to turn +me. Do not, therefore, make the attempt; it will only end in your +certain defeat and shame, and in my withdrawing from your sight for +ever. You will not, I am sure, pay me so bad a compliment as to wish +me to renew the follies of my youth. If you love me, respect me; +promise, by the love you bear to Miss Somerville, and your affection +for this poor boy, that you will do as I wish you. Your honour and +peace of mind, as well as mine, demand it." + +This severe rebuke, from a quarter, whence I least expected it, threw +me back with shame and confusion. As if a mirror had been held up +to me, I saw my own deformity. I saw that Eugenia was not only the +guardian of her own honour, but of mine, and of the happiness of Miss +Somerville, against whom I now stood convicted of foul deceit and +shameful wrong. I acknowledged my fault, I assured Eugenia that I was +bound to her, by every tie of honour, esteem, and love; and that her +boy and mine should be our mutual care. + +"Thank you, dearest," said she: "you have taken a heavy load from my +mind: henceforth remember we are brother and sister. I shall now be +able to enjoy the pleasure of your society; and now, as that point is +settled, let me know what has occurred to you since we parted--the +particulars I mean, for the outline I have had before." + +I related to her everything which had happened to me, from the hour of +our separation to the moment I saw her so unexpectedly in the theatre. +She was alternately affected with terror, surprise, and laughter. She +took a hearty crying spell over the motionless bodies of Clara and +Emily, as they lay on the floor; but recovered from that, and went +into hysterics of laughter, when I described the footman's mistake, +and the slap on the face bestowed on him by the housemaid. + +My mind was not naturally corrupt. It was only so at times, and from +peculiar circumstances; but I was always generous, and easily recalled +to a sense of my duty, when reminded of my fault. Not for an empire +would I have persuaded Eugenia to break her vow. I loved and respected +the mother of my child; the more when I reflected that she had been +the means of preserving my fidelity to Emily. I rejoiced to think +that my friendship for the one, and love for the other, were not +incompatible. I wrote immediately to Emily, announcing my speedy +return to England. + +"Having the most perfect reliance on your honour, I shall now," said +Eugenia, "accept of your escort to London, where my presence is +required. Pierre shall accompany us--he is a faithful creature, though +you used him so ill." + +"That," said I, "is all made up, and Pierre will be heartily glad of +another tumble for the same price." + +All our arrangements were speedily made. The house was given up--a +roomy travelling barouche received all our trunks; and, seated by the +side of Eugenia, with the child between us, we crossed the Gironde, +and took our way through Poictiers, Tours, and Orleans, to Paris; here +we remained but a short time. Neither of us were pleased with the +manners and habits of the French; but as they have been so fully +described by the swarms of English travellers who have infested +that country with their presence, and this with the fruits of their +labours, I shall pass as quietly through France, as I hope to do +through the Thames Tunnel, when it is completed, but not before. + +Eugenia consulted me as to her future residence; and here I own +I committed a great error, but, I declare to Heaven, without any +criminal intention. I ventured to suggest that she should live in a +very pretty village a few miles from ---- Hall, the residence of Mr +Somerville, and where, after my marriage, it was intended that I +should continue to reside with Emily. To this village, then, I +directed her to go, assuring her that I should often ride over and +visit her. + +"Much as I should enjoy your company, Frank," said Eugenia, "this is +a measure fraught with evil to all parties; nor is it fair dealing +towards your future wife." + +Unhappily for me, that turn for duplicity, which I had imbibed in +early life, had not forsaken me, notwithstanding the warnings I had +received, and the promises of amendment which I had made. Flattering +myself that I intended no harm, I overruled all the scruples of +the excellent Eugenia. She despatched a confidential person to the +village; on the outskirts of which, he procured for her a commodious, +and even elegant cottage ornée ready furnished. She went down with her +child and Pierre to take possession; and I to my father's house, where +my appearance was hailed as a signal for a grand jubilee. + +Clara I found had entirely changed her unfavourable opinion of sea +officers, induced thereto by the engaging manners of my friend Talbot, +on whom I was delighted to learn she was about to bestow her very +pretty little white hand at the altar. This was a great triumph to the +navy, for I always told Clara, laughingly, that I never would forgive +her if she quitted the service; and as I entertained the highest +respect for Talbot, I considered the prospects of my sister were very +bright and flattering, and that she had made a choice very likely to +secure her happiness. "Rule Britannia," said I to Clara; "Blue for +ever!" + +The next morning I started for Mr Somerville's, where I was of course +received with open arms; and the party, a few days after, having been +increased by the arrival of my father with Clara and Talbot, I was as +happy as a human being could be. Six weeks was the period assigned by +my fair one as the very shortest in which she could get rigged, bend +new sails, and prepare for the long and sometimes tedious voyage of +matrimony. I remonstrated at the unconscionable delay. + +"Long as it may appear," she said, "it is much less time than you took +to fit out your fine frigate for North America." + +"That frigate was not got ready even then by any hurry of mine," said +I; "and if ever I come to be first lord of the Admiralty, I shall +have a bright eye on the young lieutenants and their sweethearts +at Blackheath, particularly when a ship is fitting in a hurry at +Woolwich." + +Much of this kind of sparring went on, to the great amusement of all +parties; meanwhile, the ladies employed themselves in running up +milliner's bills, and their papas employed themselves in discharging +them. My father was particularly liberal to Emily in the articles of +plate and jewellery, and Mr Somerville equally kind to Clara. Emily +received a trinket box, so beautifully fitted and so well filled, that +it required a cheque of no trifling magnitude to cry quits with the +jeweller; indeed my father's kindness was so great, that I was forced +to beg he would set some bounds to his liberality. + +I was so busy and so happy, that I had let three weeks pass over my +head without seeing Eugenia. I dreamed of her at last, and thought she +upbraided me; and the next day, full of my dream, as soon as breakfast +was over, I recommended the young ladies to the care of Talbot, and, +mounting my horse, rode over to see Eugenia. She received me kindly, +but she had suffered in her health, and was much out of spirits. I +inquired the reason, and she burst into tears. "I shall be better, +Frank," said she, "when all is over, but I must suffer now; and I +suffer the more acutely from a conviction that I am only paying +the penalty of my own crime. Perhaps," continued she, "had I never +departed from virtue, I might at this moment have held in your heart +the envied place of Miss Somerville; but as the righteous decrees of +Providence having provided punishment to tread fast in the footsteps +of guilt, I am now expiating my faults, and I have a presentiment that +although the struggle is bitter, it will soon be over. God's will be +done; and may you, my dear Frank, have many, many happy years in the +society of one you are bound to love before the unhappy Eugenia." + +Here she sank on a sofa, and again wept bitterly. + +"I feel," said she, "now, but it is too late--I feel that I have acted +wrongly in quitting Bordeaux. There I was loved and respected; and +if not happy, at least I was composed. Too much dependence on my +resolution, and the vanity of supposing myself superior in magnanimity +to the rest of my sex, induced me to trust myself in your society. +Dearly, alas! have I paid for it. My only chance of victory over +myself was flight from you, after I had given the irrevocable +sentence; by not doing so, the poison has again found its way to my +heart. I feel that I love you; that I cannot have you; and that death, +very shortly, must terminate my intolerable sufferings." + +This affecting address pierced me to the soul; and now the +consequences of my guilt and duplicity rushed upon me like a torrent +through a bursting flood-gate. I would have resigned Emily, I would +have fled with Eugenia to some distant country, and buried our sorrows +in each other's bosoms; and, in a state of irrepressible emotion, I +proposed this step to her. + +"What do I hear, my beloved?" said she (starting up with horror from +the couch on which she was sitting, with her face between her knees), +"what! is it you that would resign home, friends, character, the +possession of a virtuous woman, all, for the polluted smiles of an ----" + +"Hold! hold! my Eugenia," said I; "do not, I beseech you, shock my +ears with an epithet which you do not deserve! Mine, mine, is all the +guilt; forget me, and you will still be happy." + +She looked at me, then at her sweet boy, who was playing on the +carpet--but she made no answer; and then a flood of tears succeeded. + +It was, indeed, a case of singular calamity for a beautiful young +creature to be placed in. She was only in her three-and-twentieth +year--and, lovely as she was, nature had scarcely had time to finish +the picture. The regrets which subdued my mind on that fatal morning +may only be conceived by those who, like me, have led a licentious +life--have, for a time, buried all moral and religious feeling, and +have been suddenly called to a full sense of their guilt, and the +misery they have entailed on the innocent. I sat down and groaned. I +cannot say I wept, for I could not weep; but my forehead burned, and +my heart was full of bitterness. + +While I thus meditated, Eugenia sat with her hand on her forehead, in +a musing attitude. Had she been reverting to her former studies, and +thrown herself into the finest conceivable posture of the tragic muse, +her appearance would not have been half so beautiful and affecting. +I thought she was praying, and I think so still. The tears ran in +silence down her face; I kissed them off, and almost forgot Emily. + +"I am better now, Frank," said the poor, sorrowful woman; "do not come +again until after the wedding. When will it take place?" she inquired, +with a trembling and a faltering voice. + +My heart almost burst within me, as I told her, for I felt as if I +was signing a warrant for her execution. I took her in my arms, and, +tenderly embracing her, endeavoured to divert her thoughts from the +mournful fate that too evidently hung over her; she became tranquil, +and I proposed taking a stroll in the adjoining park. I thought the +fresh air would revive her. + +She agreed to this; and, going to her room, returned in a few minutes. +To her natural beauty was added on that fatal day a morning dress, +which more than any other became her; it was white, richly trimmed, +and fashionably made up by a celebrated French milliner. Her bonnet +was white muslin, trimmed with light blue ribbons, and a sash of the +same colour confined her slender waist. The little Eugenio ran before +us, now at my side, and now at his mother's. We rambled about for some +time, the burthen of our conversation being the future plans and mode +of education to be adopted for the child; this was a subject on which +she always dwelt with peculiar pleasure. + +Tired with our walk, we sat down under a clump of beech trees, near +a grassy ascent, winding among the thick foliage, contrived by the +opulent owner to extend and diversify the rides in his noble domain. +Eugenio was playing around us, picking the wild flowers, and running +up to me to inquire their names. + +The boy was close by my side, when, startled at a noise, he turned +round and exclaimed-- + +"Oh! look, mamma, look, papa, there is a lady and a gentleman +a-riding." + +I turned round, and saw Mr Somerville and Emily on horseback, within +six paces of me; so still they stood, so mute, I could have fancied +Emily a wax-work figure. They neither breathed nor moved; even their +very horses seemed to be of bronze, or, perhaps the unfortunate +situation in which I found myself made me think them so. They had come +as unexpectedly on us as we had discovered them. The soft turf had +received the impression of their horses' feet, and returned no sound; +and if they snorted, we had either not attended to them in the warmth +of our conversation, or we had never heard them. + +I rose up hastily--coloured deeply--stammered, and was about to speak. +Perhaps it was better that I did not; but I had no opportunity. Like +apparitions they came, and like apparitions they vanished. The avenue +from whence they had so silently issued, received them again, and they +were gone before Eugenia was sensible of their presence. + + + + +Chapter XXVII + + Fare thee well; and if for ever-- + Still for ever fare thee well: + Even though unforgiving, never + 'Gainst thee shall my heart rebel. + + BYRON. + + +I was so stunned with this _contretemps_, that I fell senseless to the +ground; and it was long before the kind attentions and assiduity of +Eugenia could restore me. When she had succeeded, my first act was one +of base ingratitude, cruelty, and injustice: I spurned her from me, +and upbraided her as the cause of my unfortunate situation. She only +replied with tears. I quitted her and the child without bidding them +adieu, little thinking I should never see them again. I ran to the +inn, where I had left my horse, mounted, and rode back to ---- Hall. +Mr Somerville and his daughter had just arrived, and Emily was lifted +off her horse, and obliged to be carried up to her room. + +Clara and Talbot came to enquire what had happened. I could give +no account of it; but earnestly requested to see Emily. The answer +returned was that Miss Somerville declined seeing me. In the course of +this day, which, in point of mental suffering, exceeded all I had +ever endured in the utmost severity of professional hardship, an +explanation had taken place between myself, my father, and Mr +Somerville. I had done that by the impulse of dire necessity which I +ought to have done at first of my own free will. I was caught at last +in my own snare. "The trains of the devil are long," said I to myself, +"but they are sure to blow up at last." + +The consequence of the explanation was my final dismissal, and a +return of all the presents which my father and myself had given to +Emily. My conduct, though blamable, was not viewed in that heinous +light, either by my father or Mr Somerville; and both of them did all +that could be done to restore harmony. Clara and Talbot interposed +their kind offices, but with no better success. The maiden pride of +the inexorable Emily had been alarmed by a beautiful rival, with a +young family, in the next village. The impression had taken hold of +her spotless mind, and could not be removed. I was false, fickle, and +deceitful, and was given to understand that Miss Somerville did not +intend to quit her room until she was assured by her father that I was +no longer a guest in the house. + +Under these painful circumstances, our remaining any longer at the +Hall was both useless and irksome--a source of misery to all. + +My father ordered his horses the next morning, and I was carried back +to London, more dead than alive. A burning fever raged in my blood; +and the moment I reached my father's house, I was put to bed, and +placed under the care of a physician, with nurses to watch me night +and day. For three weeks I was in a state of delirium; and when I +regained my senses, it was only to renew the anguish which had +caused my disorder, and I felt any sentiment except gratitude for my +recovery. + +My dear Clara had never quitted me during my confinement. I had taken +no medicine but from her hand. I asked her to give me some account of +what had happened. She told me that Talbot was gone--that my father +had seen Mr Somerville, who had informed him that Emily had received +a long letter from Eugenia, narrating every circumstance, exculpating +me, and accusing herself. Emily had wept over it, but still remained +firm in her resolution never to see me more--"And I am afraid, my dear +brother," said Clara, "that her resolution will not be very easily +altered. You know her character, and you should know something about +our sex; but sailors, they say, go round the world without going into +it. This is the only shadow of an excuse I can form for you, much as I +love and esteem you. You have hurt Emily in the nicest point, that in +which we are all the most susceptible of injury. You have wounded her +pride, which our sex rarely, if ever, forgive. At the very moment she +supposed you were devoted to her--that you were wrapped up in the +anticipation of calling her your own, and counting the minutes with +impatience until the happy day arrived; with all this persuasion +on her mind, she comes upon you, as the traveller out of the wood +suddenly comes upon the poisonous snake in his path, and cannot avoid +it. She found you locked hand-in-hand with another, a fortnight before +marriage, and with the fruits of unlawful love in your arms. What +woman could forgive this? I would not, I assure you. If Tal---, I mean +if any man were to serve me so, I would tear him from my heart, +even if the dissolution of the whole frame was to be the certain +consequence. I consider it a kindness to tell you, Frank, that you +have no hope. Much as you have and will suffer, she, poor girl, will +suffer more; and, although she will never accept you, she will not let +your place be supplied by another, but sink, broken-hearted, into her +grave. You, like all other men, will forget this; but what a warning +ought it to be to you, that, sooner or later, guilt will be productive +of misery! This you have fully proved: your licentious conduct with +this woman has ruined her peace for ever, and Divine vengeance has +dashed from your lips the cup which contained as much happiness as +this world could afford: nor has the penalty fallen on you alone--the +innocent, who had no share in the crime, are partakers in the +punishment; we are all as miserable as yourself. But God's will be +done," continued she, as she kissed my aching forehead, and her tears +fell on my face. + +How heavenly is the love of a sister towards a brother! Clara was now +everything to me. Having said thus much to me on the subject of my +fault (and it must be confessed that she had not been niggardly in the +article of words), she never named the subject again, but sought by +every means in her power to amuse and to comfort me. She listened +to my exculpation; she admitted that our meeting at Bordeaux was as +unpremeditated as it was unfortunate; she condemned the imprudence of +our travelling together, and still more the choice of a residence for +Eugenia and her son. + +Clara's affectionate attention and kind efforts were unavailing. I +told her so, and that all hopes of happiness for me in this world were +gone for ever. + +"My dear, dear brother," said the affectionate girl, "answer me one +question. Did you ever pray?" + +My answer will pretty well explain to the reader the sort of religion +mine was:-- + +"Why, Clara," said I, "to tell you the truth, though I may not exactly +pray, as you call it, yet words are nothing. I feel grateful to the +Almighty for his favours when he bestows them on me; and I believe a +grateful heart is all he requires." + +"Then, brother, how do you feel when he afflicts you?" + +"That I have nothing to thank him for," answered I. + +"Then, my dear Frank, that is not religion." + +"May be so," said I; "but I am in no humour to feel otherwise, at +present, so pray drop the subject." + +She burst into tears. "This," said she, "is worse than all. Shall +we receive good from the hand of the Lord, and shall we not receive +evil?" + +But seeing that I was in that sullen and untameable state of mind, she +did not venture to renew the subject. + +As soon as I was able to quit my room, I had a long conversation with +my father, who, though deeply concerned for my happiness, said he was +quite certain that any attempt at reconciliation would be useless. He +therefore proposed two plans, and I might adopt whichever was the most +likely to divert my mind from my heavy affliction. The first was, to +ask his friends at the Admiralty to give me the command of a sloop +of war; the second, that I should go upon the continent, and, having +passed a year there, return to England, when there was no knowing what +change of sentiment time and absence might not produce in my favour. +"For," said he, "there is one very remarkable difference in the heart +of a man and of a woman. In the first, absence is very often a cure +for love. In the other, it more frequently cements and consolidates +it. In your absence, Emily will dwell on the bright parts of your +character, and forget its blemishes. The experiment is worth making, +and it is the only way which offers a chance of success." + +I agreed to this. "But," said I, "as the war with France is now over, +and that with America will be terminated no doubt very shortly, I +have no wish to put you to the expense, or myself to the trouble, of +fitting out a sloop of war in time of peace, to be a pleasure-yacht +for great lords and ladies, and myself to be neither more or less than +a _maître d'hotel_: and, after having spent your money and mine, and +exhausted all my civilities, to receive no thanks, and hear that I +am esteemed at Almack's only 'a tolerable sea brute enough.' A +ship, therefore," continued I, "I will not have; and as I think the +continent holds out some novelty at least, I will, with your consent, +set off." + +This point being settled, I told Clara of it. The poor girl's grief +was immoderate. "My dearest brother, I shall lose you, and be left +alone in the world. Your impetuous and unruly heart is not in a state +to be trusted among the gay and frivolous French. You will be at sea +without your compass--you have thrown religion overboard--and what is +to guide you in the hour of trial?" + +"Fear not, dear Clara," said I; "my own energies will always extricate +me from the dangers you apprehend." + +"Alas! it is these very energies which I dread," said Clara; "but +I trust that all will be for the best. Accept," said she, "of this +little book from poor broken-hearted Clara; and, if you love her, look +at it sometimes." + +I took the book, and embracing her affectionately, assured her, that +for her sake I would read it. + +When I had completed my arrangements for my foreign tour, I determined +to take one last look at ---- Hall before I left England. I set off +unknown to my family; and contrived to be near the boundaries of the +park by dusk. I desired the postboy to stop half a mile from the +house, and to wait my return. I cleared the paling; and, avoiding the +direct road, came up to the house. The room usually occupied by the +family was on the ground floor, and I cautiously approached the +window. Mr Somerville and Emily were both there. He was reading aloud; +she sat at the table with a book before her: but her thoughts, it was +evident, were not there; she had inserted her taper fingers into +the ringlets of her hair, until the palms of her hand reached her +forehead; then, bending her head towards the table, she leaned on her +elbows, and seemed absorbed in the most melancholy reflections. + +"This, too, is my work," said I; "this fair flower is blighted, and +withering by the contagious touch of my baneful hand. Good Heaven! +what a wretch am I! whoever loves me is rewarded by misery. And what +have I gained by this wide waste and devastation, which my wickedness +has spread around me? Happiness? no, no--that I have lost for ever. +Would that _my_ loss were all! would that comfort might visit the soul +of this fair creature and another. But I dare not--I cannot pray; I +am at enmity with God and man. Yet I will make an effort in favour of +this victim of my baseness. O God," continued I, "if the prayers of an +outcast like me can find acceptance, not for myself, but for her, I +ask that peace which the world cannot give; shower down thy blessings +upon her, alleviate her sorrows, and erase from her memory the +existence of such a being as myself. Let not my hateful image hang as +a blight upon her beauteous frame." + +Emily resumed her book, when her father had ceased reading aloud; and +I saw her wipe a tear from her cheek. + +The excitement occasioned by this scene, added to my previous illness, +from the effects of which I had not sufficiently recovered, caused a +faintness; I sat down under the window, in hopes that it would pass +off. It did not, however; for I fell, and lay on the turf in a state +of insensibility, which must have lasted nearly half an hour. I +afterwards learned from Clara, that Emily had opened the window, it +being a French one, to walk out and recover herself. By the bright +moon-light, she perceived me lying on the ground. Her first idea was, +that I had committed suicide; and, with this impression, she shut +the window, and tottering to the back part of the room, fainted. Her +father ran to her assistance, and she fell into his arms. She was +taken up to her room, and consigned to the care of her woman, who put +her to bed; but she was unable to give any account of herself, or the +cause of her disorder, until the following day. + +For my own part, I gradually came to my senses, and with difficulty +regained my chaise, the driver of which told me I had been gone about +an hour. I drove off to town, wholly unaware that I had been observed +by any one, much less by Emily. When she related to her father what +she had seen, he either disbelieved or affected to disbelieve it, and +treated it as the effects of a distempered mind, the phantoms of a +disordered imagination; and she at length began to coincide with him. + +I started for the continent a few days afterwards. Talbot, who had +seen little of Clara since my rejection by Emily, and subsequent +illness, offered my father to accompany me; and Clara was anxious that +he should go, as she was determined not to listen to any thing he +could say during my affliction; she could not, she said, be happy +while I was miserable, and gave him no opportunity of conversing with +her on the subject of their union. + +We arrived at Paris; but so abstracted was I in thought, that I +neither saw nor heard any thing. Every attention of Talbot was lost +upon me. I continued in my sullen stupor, and forgot to read the +little book which dear Clara had given, and which, for her sake, I had +promised to read. I wrote to Eugenia on my arrival; and disburthened +my mind in some measure, by acknowledging my shameful treatment of +her. I implored her pardon; and, by return of post, received it. +Her answer was affectionate and consoling; but she stated that her +spirits, of course, were low, and her health but indifferent. + +For many days my mind remained in a state, of listless inanity; and +Talbot applied, or suffered others to apply, the most pernicious +stimulant that could be thought of to rouse me to action. Taking +a quiet walk with him, we met some friends of his; and, at their +request, we agreed to go to the saloons of the Palais Royal. This was +a desperate remedy, and by a miracle only was I saved from utter and +irretrievable ruin. How many of my countrymen have fallen victims to +the arts practised in that horrible school of vice, I dare not say! +Happy should I be to think that the infection had not reached our own +shores, and found patrons among the great men of the land. They have, +however, both felt the consequences, and been forewarned of the +danger. _They_ have no excuse: _mine_ was, that I had been excluded +from the society of those I loved. Always living by excitement, was it +surprising that, when a gaming-table displayed its hoards before me, I +should have fallen at once into the snare? + +For the first time since my illness, I became interested, and laid +down my money on those abhorred tables. My success was variable; but +I congratulated myself that at length I had found a stimulus; and I +anxiously awaited the return of the hour when the doors would again be +opened, and the rooms lighted up for the reception of company. I won +considerably; and night after night found me at the table--for avarice +is insatiable; but my good luck left me: and then the same motive +induced me to return, with the hope of winning back what I had lost. + +Still fortune was unpropitious, and I lost very considerable sums. I +became desperate; and drew largely on my father. He wrote to beg that +I would be more moderate; as twice his income would not support such +an expenditure. He wrote also to Talbot, who informed him in +what manner the money had been expended; and that he had in vain +endeavoured to divert me from the fatal practice. Finding that no +limits were likely to be put to my folly, my father very properly +refused to honour any more of my bills. + +Maddened with this intimation, for which I secretly blamed Talbot, I +drew upon Eugenia's banker bill after bill, until the sum amounted +to more than what my father had paid. At length a letter came from +Eugenia. It was but a few lines. + +"I know too well, my dearest friend," said she, "what becomes of the +money you have received. If you want it all, I cannot refuse you; but +remember that you are throwing away the property of your child." + +This letter did more to rouse me to a sense of my infamous conduct +than the advice of Talbot, or the admonitions of my father. I felt I +was acting like a scoundrel; and I resolved to leave off gaming. "One +night more," said I, "and then, if I lose, there is an end of it; I go +no more." Talbot attended me: he felt he was in some measure the cause +of my being first initiated in this pernicious amusement: and he +watched my motions with unceasing anxiety. + +The game was _rouge et noir_. I threw a large sum on the red. I won, +left the stake, doubled, and won again. The heap of gold had increased +to a large size, and still remained to abide the chance of the card. +Again, again, and again, it was doubled. Seven times had the red card +been turned up; and seven times had my gold been doubled. Talbot, who +stood behind me, implored and begged me earnestly to leave off. + +"What may be the consequence of one card against you? Trust no more to +fortune; be content with what you have got." + +"That," muttered I, "Talbot, is of no use; I must have more." + +Again came up the red, to the astonishment of the bystanders; and to +their still greater astonishment, my gold, which had increased to an +enormous heap, still remained on the table. Talbot again entreated me +not to tempt fortune foolishly. + +"Folly," said I, "Talbot, has already been committed; and one more +card will do the business. It must be done." + +The bankers knowing, after eight red cards had been turned up, how +great the chance was of regaining all their losses by a double or +quits, agreed to the ninth card. Talbot trembled like a leaf. The card +was turned; it came up red, and the bank was broke. + +Here all play ceased for that night. The losers, of course, vented +their feelings in the most blasphemous execrations; while I quietly +collected all my winnings, and returned home in a _fiacre_, with +Talbot, who took the precaution of requesting the attendance of two +_gens d'armes_. These were each rewarded with a Napoleon. + +"Now, Talbot," said I, "I solemnly swear, as I hope to go to heaven, +never to play again." And this promise I have most religiously kept. +My good fortune was one instance in ten thousand, among those who have +been ruined in that house. The next morning I refunded all I had drawn +upon Eugenia, and all my father had supplied me with, and there still +remained a considerable residue. + +Determined not to continue in this vortex of dissipation any longer, +where my resolution was hourly put to the test, Talbot and myself +agreed to travel down to Brest, an arsenal we were both desirous of +seeing. + + + + +Chapter XXVIII + + _Pal_. Thou art a traitor, Arcite, and a fellow + False as thy title to her. Friendship, blood, + And all the ties between us, I disclaim. + _Arc_. You are mad. + _Pal_. I must be, + Till thou art worthy, Arcite; it concerns me! + And, in this madness, if I hazard thee + And take thy life, I deal but truly. + _Arc_. Fie, Sir! + + _Two Noble Kimmen_. + + +We quitted Paris two days after; and a journey of three days, through +an uninteresting country, brought us to the little town of Granville, +on the sea-coast, in the channel. We remained at this delightful place +some days; and our letters being regularly forwarded to us, brought us +intelligence from England. My father expressed his astonishment at +my returning the money drawn for; and trusted, unaccountable as the +restitution appeared, that I was not offended, and would consider him +my banker, as far as his expenditure and style of living would permit +him to advance. + +Eugenia, in her letters, reproached herself for having written to me; +and concluded that I had drawn so largely upon her, merely to prove +her sincerity. She assured me that her caution to me was not dictated +by selfishness, but from a consideration for the child. + +Clara's letter informed me that every attempt, even to servility, had +been made, in order to induce Emily to alter her determination, but +without success; and that a coolness had, in consequence, taken +place, and almost an entire interruption of the intimacy between the +families. She also added, "I am afraid that your friend is even worse +than yourself; for I understand that he is engaged to another woman, +and has been so for years. Now, as I must consider that the great tie +of your intimacy is his supposed partiality to me, and as I conceive +you are under a false impression with respect to his sincerity, +I think it my duty to make you acquainted with all I know. It is +impossible that you can esteem the man who has trifled with the +feelings of your sister; and I sincerely hope that the next letter +from you will inform me of your having separated." + +How little did poor Clara think, when she wrote this letter, of +the consequences likely to arise from it; that in thus venting her +complaints, she was exploding a mine which was to produce results ten +times more fatal than any thing which had yet befallen us? + +I was at this period in a misanthropic state of mind, hating myself +and every one about me. The company of Talbot had long been endured, +not enjoyed; and I would gladly have availed myself of any plausible +excuse for a separation. True, he was my friend, had proved himself +so; but I was in no humour to acknowledge favours. Discarded by her I +loved, I discarded every one else. Talbot was a log and a chain, and I +thought I could not get rid of him too soon. This letter, therefore, +gave me a fair opportunity of venting my spleen; but instead of a cool +dismissal, as Clara requested, I determined to dismiss him or myself +to another world. + +Having finished reading my letter, I laid it down, and made no +observation. Talbot, with his usual kind and benevolent countenance, +inquired if I had any news? "Yes," I replied, "I have discovered that +you are a villain!" + +"That is news, indeed," said he; "and strange that the brother of +Clara should have been the messenger to convey it; but this is +language, Frank, which not even your unhappy state of mind can excuse. +Retract your words." + +"I repeat them," said I. "You have trifled with my sister, and are a +villain." (Had this been true, it was no more than I had done myself; +but my victims had no brothers to avenge their wrongs.) + +"The name of Clara," replied Talbot, "calms me; believe me, Frank, +you are mistaken. I love her, and have always had the most honourable +intentions towards her." + +"Yes," said I, with a sarcastic sneer, "at the time that you have +been engaged to another woman for years. To one or the other you must +acknowledge yourself a scoundrel: I do not, therefore, withdraw my +appellation, but repeat it; and as you seem so very patient under +injuries, I inform you that you must either meet me on the sands this +evening, or consent to be stigmatised with another name still more +revolting to the feelings of an Englishman." + +"Enough, enough, Frank," said Talbot, with a face, in which conscious +innocence and manly fortitude were blended; "you have said more than I +ever expected to have heard from you, and more than the customs of the +world will allow me to put up with. What must be, must; but I still +tell you, Frank, that you are wrong--that you are fatally deluded, and +that you will bitterly repent the follies of this day. It is yourself +with whom you are angry, and you are venting that anger on your +friend." + +The words were thrown away on me. I felt a secret malignant pleasure, +which blindly impelled me forward, with the certainty of glutting my +revenge, by either destroying or being destroyed. My sole preparation +for this dreadful conflict was my pistols; no other did I think of, +not even the chances of sending my friend and fellow-mortal, or going +myself into the presence of an Almighty judge. My mind was absorbed in +secret pleasure, at the idea of that acute misery which Emily would +suffer if I fell by the hand of Talbot. + +I repaired to the rendezvous, where I found Talbot waiting. He came up +to me, and again said, + +"Frank, I call heaven to witness that you are mistaken. You are wrong. +Suspend your opinion, at least, if you will not recall your words." + +Totally possessed by the devil, and not to be convinced, till too +late, I replied to his peaceful overture by the most insulting irony: +"You were not afraid to fire at a poor boy in the water," said I, +"though you do not like to stand a shot in return. Come, come, take +your ground, be a man, stand up, don't be afraid." + +"For myself," said Talbot, with a firm and placid resignation of +countenance, "I have no fears; but for you, Frank, I have great cause +of alarm:" so saying, he snatched up the loaded pistol which I threw +down to him. + +We had no seconds; nor was there any person in sight. It was a bright +moonlight, and we walked to the water's edge, where the reflux of the +tide had left the sand firm to the tread. Here we stood back to back. +The usual distance was fourteen paces. Talbot refused to measure his, +but stood perfectly still. I walked ten paces, and turned round, +"Ready," said I in a low voice. + +We both raised our arms; but Talbot, instantly dropping the muzzle of +his pistol, said, "I cannot fire at the brother of Clara." + +"I can at her insulter," answered I; and, taking deliberate aim, +fired, and my ball entered his side. He bounded, gave a half turn +round in the air, and fell on his face to the ground. + +How sudden are the transitions of the human mind! how close does +remorse follow the gratification of revenge! The veil dropped from my +eyes; I saw in an instant the false medium, the deceitful vision which +had thus allured me into what the world calls "an affair of honour." +"Honour," good heaven! had made me a murderer, and the voice of my +brother's blood cried out for vengeance. + +The manly and athletic form, which one minute before excited my most +malignant hatred, when now prostrate and speechless, became an object +of frantic affection. I ran to Talbot, and when it was too late +perceived the mischief I had done. Murder, cruelty, injustice, and, +above all, the most detestable ingratitude, flashed at once into +my overcrowded imagination. I turned the body round, and tried to +discover if there were any signs of life. A small stream of blood ran +from his side, and, about two feet from him, was lost in the absorbing +sand; while from the violence of his fall the sand had filled his +mouth and nostrils. I cleaned them out; and, staunching the wound with +my handkerchief, for the blood flowed copiously at every respiration, +I sat on the sea-shore by his side, supporting him in my arms. I only +exclaimed, "Would to God the shark, the poison, the sword of the +enemy, or the precipice of Trinidad had destroyed me before this fatal +hour." + +Talbot opened his languid eyes, and fixed them on me with a glassy +stare; but he did not speak. Suddenly, recollection seemed for a +moment to return--he recognised me, and, O God, his look of kindness +pierced my heart. He made several efforts to speak, and at last said, +in broken accents, and at long and painful intervals, + +"Look at letter--writing-desk--read all--explain--God bless--" His +head fell back, and he was dead. + +Oh, how I envied him! Had he been ten thousand times more guilty than +I had ever supposed him, it would have given no comfort to my mind. I +had murdered him, and too late I acknowledged his innocence. I know +not why, and can scarcely tell how I did it, but I took off my +neckcloth, and bound it tightly round his waist, over the wound. The +blood ceased to flow. I left the body, and returned to our lodging, in +a state of mental prostration and misery, proportioned to the heat and +excitement with which I had quitted it. + +My first object was to read the letters which my poor friend had +referred to. On my arrival, both our servants were up. My hands and +clothes were dyed with blood, and they looked at me with astonishment. +I ran hastily upstairs, to avoid them, and took the writing-desk, the +key of which I knew hung to his watch-chain. Seizing the poker, I +split it open, and took out the packet he mentioned. At this moment +his servant entered the room. + +"_Et mon maître, Monsieur, où est-il_?" + +"I have murdered him," said I, "and you will find him in the sands, +near the signal-post; and," continued I, "I am now robbing him!" + +My appearance and actions seemed to prove the truth of my assertion. +The man flew out of the room; but I was regardless of everything, and +even wonder why I should have given my attention to the letters at +all, especially as I had now convinced myself of Talbot's innocence. +The packet, however, I did read; and it consisted of a series of +letters between Talbot and his father, who had engaged him to a young +lady of rank and fortune, without consulting him--_une mariage +de convenance_--which Talbot had resisted in consequence of his +attachment to Clara. + +I have already stated that Talbot was of high aristocratic family; and +this marriage being wished for by the parents of both parties, they +had given it out as being finally settled to take place on the return +of Talbot to England. In the last letter, the father had yielded to +his entreaties in favour of Clara; only requesting him not to be +precipitate in offering himself, as he wished to find some excuse for +breaking off the match; and, above all, he fatally enjoined profound +secrecy till the affair was arranged. Here, then, was everything +explained. Indeed, before I had read these letters, my mind did not +need this damning proof of his innocence and my guilt. + +Just as I had finished reading, _the gens d'armes_ entered my room, +and, with the officers of justice, led me away to prison. I walked +mechanically. I was conducted to a small building in the centre of a +square. This was a _cachot_, with an iron-grated window on each of +its four sides, but without glass. There was no bench, or table, or +anything but the bare walls and the pavement. The wind blew sharply +through. I had not even a great-coat; but I felt no cold or personal +inconvenience, for my mind was too much occupied by superior misery. +The door closed on me, and I heard the bolts turn. There was not an +observation made on either part, and I was left to myself. + +"Well," said I, "Fate has now done its worst, and Fortune will be +weary at last of tormenting a wretch that she can sink no lower! Death +has no terrors for me; and, after death--!" But, even in my misery, +I scarcely gave a thought to what might happen in futurity. It +might occasionally have obtruded itself on my mind, but was quickly +dismissed: I had adopted the atheistical creed of the French +Revolution. + +"Death is eternal sleep, and the sooner I go to sleep the better!" +thought I. The only point that pressed itself on my mind was the dread +of a public execution. This my pride revolted at; for pride had again +returned, and resumed its empire, even in my _cachot_. + +As the day dawned, the noise of the carts and country people coming +into the square with their produce, roused me from my reverie, for I +had not slept. The prison was surrounded by all ages and all classes, +to get a sight of the English murderer; and the light and the air were +stopped out of each window by human faces pressed against the bars. I +was gazed at as a wild beast; and the children, as they sat on their +mothers' shoulders to look at me, received a moral lesson and a +warning at my expense. + +As a tiger, in his cage, wearies the eye by incessantly walking and +turning, so I paced my den; and if I could have reached one of the +impertinent gazers, through the slanting aperture and three foot +wall, I should have throttled him. "All these people," said I, "and +thousands more, will witness my last moments on the scaffold!" + +Stung with this dreadful thought, with rage I searched in my +pockets for my penknife, to relieve me at one from my torments and +apprehensions; and had I found it, I should certainly have committed +suicide. Fortunately I had left it at home, or it would have been +buried, in that moment of frenzy, in the carotid artery; for as well +as others, I knew exactly where to find it. + +The crowd at length began to disperse; the windows were left, except +now and then an urchin of a boy showed his ragged head at the grille. +Worn out with bodily fatigue and mental suffering, I was going to +throw myself along upon the cold stones, when I saw the face of my own +servant, who advanced in haste to the window of the prison, exclaiming +with joy-- + +"_Courage, mon cher maître; Monsieur Talbot n'est pas mort_." + +"Not dead!" exclaimed I (falling unconsciously on my knees, and +lifting up my clasped hands and haggard eyes to Heaven): "not dead! +God be praised. At least there is a hope that I may escape the crime +of murder." + +Before I could say more, the mayor entered my _cachot_ with the +officers of the police, and informed me that a _procès-verbal_ had +been held; that my friend had been able to give the clearest answers +to all their questions; and that it appeared from the evidence of +_Monsieur Talbot_ himself, that it was an affair _d'honneur_, fairly +decided; that the brace of pistols found in the water had confirmed +his assertions. "And therefore, _Monsieur_," continued the mayor, +"whether your friend lives or dies, _tout a été fait en règle, et vous +êtes libre_." + +So saying, he bowed very politely, and pointed to the door; nor was I +so ceremonious as to beg him to show me the way; out I ran, and flew +to the apartment of Talbot, who had sent my servant to say how much he +wished to see me. I found him in bed. As I entered, he held out his +hand to me, which I covered with kisses, and bathed with my tears. + +"Oh, Talbot!" said I, "can you forgive me?" + +He squeezed my hand, and from exhaustion let it fall. The surgeon led +me out of the room, saying, "All depends on his being kept quiet." I +then learned that he owed his life to two circumstances--the first +was, my having bound my neckcloth round the wound; the other was, that +the duel took place below high-water mark. The tide was rising when I +left him; and the cold waves, as they rippled against his body, had +restored him to animation. In this state he was found by his servant, +not many minutes before the flood would have covered him, for he had +not strength to remove out of its way. I ascertained also that the +ball had entered his liver, and had passed out without doing farther +injury. + +I now dressed myself, and devoutly thanking God for his miraculous +preservation, took my seat by the bed-side of the patient, which +I never quitted until his perfect recovery. When this was happily +completed, I wrote to my father and to Clara, giving both an exact +account of the whole transaction. Clara, undeceived, made no scruple +of acknowledging her attachment. Talbot was requested by his father to +return home. I accompanied him as far as Calais, where we parted; and +in a few weeks after, I had the pleasure of hearing that my sister had +become his wife. + +Left to myself, I returned slowly, and much depressed in spirits, +to Quillac's; where, ordering post-horses, I threw myself into my +travelling carriage, into which my valet had, by my orders, previously +placed my luggage. + +"Where are you going to, Monsieur?" said the valet. + +"_Au diable!_" said I. + +"_Mais les passeports?_" said the man. + +I felt that I had sufficient passports for the journey I had proposed; +but correcting myself, said, "to Switzerland." It was the first name +that came into my head; and I had heard that it was the resort of all +my countrymen whose heads, hearts, lungs, or finances were disordered. +But, during my journey, I neither saw nor heard any thing, +consequently took no notes, which my readers will rejoice at, because +they will be spared that inexhaustible supply to the trunk makers, "A +Tour through France and Switzerland." I travelled night and day; for +I could not sleep. The allegory of Io and the gad-fly, in the heathen +mythology, must surely have been intended to represent the being, who, +like myself, was tormented by a bad conscience. Like Io, I flew; and +like her, was I pursued by the eternal gad-fly, wherever I went, and +in vain did I try to escape it. + +I passed the Great St Bernard on foot. This interested me as I +approached it. The mountains below, and the Alps above, were one mass +of snow and ice, and I looked down with contempt on the world below +me. I took up my abode in the convent for some time; my ample +contributions to the box in the chapel, made me a welcome sojourner +beyond the limited period allowed to travellers, and I felt less and +less inclined to quit the scene. My amusement was climbing the most +frightful precipices, followed by the large and faithful dogs, and +viewing nature in her wildest and most sublime attire. At other times, +when bodily fatigue required rest, I sat down, with morbid melancholy, +in the receptacle for the bodies of those unfortunate persons who had +perished in the snow. There would I remain for hours, musing on their +fate: the purity of the air admitted neither putrefaction, or even +decay, for a very considerable time; and they lay, to all appearance, +as if the breath had even then only quitted them, although, on +touching those who had been there for years, they would often crumble +into dust. + +Roman Catholics, we know, are ever anxious to make converts. The prior +asked me whether I was not a protestant? I replied, that I was of no +religion; which answer was, I believe, much nearer to the truth than +any other I could have given. The reply was far more favourable to the +hopes of the monks, than if I had said I was a heretic or a moslem. +They thought me much more likely to become a convert to _their_ +religion, since I had none of my own to oppose to it. The monks +immediately arranged themselves in theological order, with the whole +armour of faith, and laid constant siege to me on all sides; but I was +not inclined to any religion, much less to the one I despised. I would +sooner have turned Turk. + +I received a letter from poor unhappy Eugenia--it was the last she +ever wrote. It was to acquaint me with the death of her lovely boy, +who, having wandered from the house, had fallen into a trout-stream, +where he was found drowned some hours after. In her distracted +state of mind, she could add no more than her blessing, and a firm +conviction that we should never meet again in this world. Her letter +concluded incoherently; and although I should have said, in the +morning, that my mind had not room for another sorrow, yet the loss of +this sweet boy, and the state of his wretched mother, found a place in +my bosom for a time, to the total exclusion of all other cares. She +requested me to hasten to her without delay, if I wished to see her +before she died. + +I took leave of the monks, and travelled with all speed to Paris, and +thence to Calais. Reaching Quillac's hotel, I received a shock which, +although I apprehended danger, I was not prepared for. It was a letter +from Eugenia's agent, announcing her death. She had been seized with +a brain fever, and had died at a small town in Norfolk, where she had +removed soon after our last unhappy interview. The agent concluded his +letter by saying, that Eugenia had bequeathed me all her property, +which was very considerable, and that her last rational words to him +were, that I was her first and her only love. + +I was now callous to suffering. My feelings had been racked to +insensibility. Like a ship in a hurricane, the last tremendous sea had +swept everything from the decks--the vessel was a wreck, driving as +the storm might chance to direct. In the midst of this devastation, +I looked around me, and the only object which presented itself to my +mind, as worthy of contemplation, was the tomb which contained the +remains of Eugenia and her child. To that I resolved to repair. + + + + +Chapter XXIX + + With sorrow and repentance true, + Father, I trembling come to you. + + _Song_. + + +I arrived at the town where poor Eugenia had breathed her last, and +near to which was the cemetery in which her remains were deposited. +I went to the inn, whence, after having dismissed my post-boy and +ordered my luggage to be taken up to my room, I proceeded on foot +towards the spot. I was informed that the path lay between the church +and the bishop's palace. I soon reached it; and, inquiring for the +sexton, who lived in a cottage hard by, requested he would lead me to +a certain grave, which I indicated by tokens too easily known. + +"Oh, you mean the sweet young lady, as died of grief for the loss of +her little boy. There it is," continued he, pointing with his finger; +"the white peacock is now sitting on the headstone of the grave, and +the little boy is buried beside it." + +I approached, while the humble sexton kindly withdrew, that I might, +without witnesses, indulge that grief which he saw was the burthen of +my aching heart. The bird remained, but without dressing its plumage, +without the usual air of surprise and vigilance evinced by domestic +fowls, when disturbed in their haunts. This poor creature was +moulting; its feathers were rumpled and disordered; its tail ragged. +There was no beauty in the animal, which was probably only kept as a +variety of the species; and it appeared to me as if it had been placed +there as a lesson to myself. In its modest attire, in its melancholy +and pensive attitude, it seemed, with its gaudy plumage, to have +dismissed the world and its vanities, while in mournful silence it +surveyed the crowded mementoes of eternity. + +"This is my office, not thine," said I, apostrophising the bird, +which, alarmed at my near approach, quitted its position, and +disappeared among the surrounding tombs. I sat down, and fixing my +eyes on the name which the tablet bore, ran over, in a hurried manner, +all that part of my career which had been more immediately connected +with the history of Eugenia. I remembered her many virtues; her +self-devotion for my honour and happiness; her concealing herself +from me, that I might not blast my prospects in life by continuing +an intimacy which she saw would end in my ruin; her firmness of +character, her disinterested generosity, and the refinement of +attachment which made her prefer misery and solitude to her own +gratification in the society of the man she loved. She had, alas! but +one fault, and that fault was loving me. I could not drive from my +thoughts, that it was through my unfortunate and illicit connection +with her that I had lost all that made life dear to me. + +At this moment (and not once since the morning I awoke from it) my +singular dream recurred to my mind. The thoughts which never had once +during my eventful voyage from the Bahamas to the Cape, and thence to +England, presented themselves in my waking hours, must certainly +have possessed my brain during sleep. Why else should it never have +occurred to my rational mind that the connection with Eugenia would +certainly endanger that intended with Emily? It was Eugenia that +placed Emily in mourning, out of my reach, and, as it were, on the top +of the Nine-Pin Rock. + +Here, then, my dream was explained; and I now felt all the horrors of +that reality which I thought at the time was no more than the effect +of a disordered imagination. Yet I could not blame Eugenia; the poor +girl had fallen a victim to that deplorable and sensual education +which I had received in the cockpit of a man-of-war. I, I alone was +the culprit. She was friendless, and without a parent to guide her +youthful steps; she fell a victim to my ungoverned passions. Maddened +with anguish of head and heart, I threw myself violently on the grave: +I beat my miserable head against the tombstones; I called with frantic +exclamation on the name of Eugenia; and at length sank on the turf, +between the two graves, in a state of stupor and exhaustion, from +which a copious flood of tears in some measure relieved me. + +I was aroused by the sound of wheels and the trampling of horses; +and, looking up, I perceived the bishop's carriage and four, with +out-riders, pass by. The livery and colour of the carriage were +certainly what is denominated quiet; but there was an appearance of +state which indicated that the owner had not entirely "renounced the +pomps and vanities of this wicked world," and my spleen was excited. + +"Ay, sweep along," I bitterly muttered, "worthy type indeed of the +apostles! I like the pride that apes humility. Is that the way +you teach your flock to 'leave all, and follow me'?" I started up +suddenly, saying to myself, "I will seek this man in his palace, and +see whether I shall be kindly received and consoled, or be repulsed by +a menial." + +The thought was sudden, and, being conceived almost in a state of +frenzy, was instantly executed. "Let me try," said I, "whether a +bishop can 'administer to the mind diseased' as well as a country +curate?" + +I moved on with rapidity to the palace, more in a fit of desperation +than with a view of seeking peace of mind. I rang loudly and +vehemently at the gate, and asked whether the bishop was at home. An +elderly domestic, who seemed to regard me with astonishment, answered +in the affirmative, and desired me to walk into an ante-room, while he +announced me to his master. + +I now began to recall my scattered senses, which had been wandering, +and to perceive the absurdity of my conduct; I was therefore about to +quit the palace, into which I had so rudely intruded, without waiting +for my audience, when the servant opened the door and requested me to +follow him. + +By what inscrutable means are the designs of Providence brought about! +While I thought I was blindly following the impulse of passion, I was, +in fact, guided by unerring Wisdom. A prey to desperate and irritated +feelings, I anticipated, with malignant pleasure, that I should detect +hypocrisy--that one who ought to set an example, should be weighed +by me, and found wanting; instead of which I stumbled on my own +salvation! Where I expected to meet with pride and scorn, I met with +humility and kindness. When I had looked around on the great circle +bounded by the visible horizon, and could perceive no friendly port in +which I might lay my shattered vessel, behold it was close at hand! + +I followed the servant with a kind of stupid indifference, and was +ushered into the presence of a benevolent-looking old man, between +sixty and seventy years of age. His whole external appearance, as well +as his white hairs, commanded respect amounting almost to admiration. +I was not prepared to speak, which he perceived, and kindly began. + +"As you are a stranger to me, I fear, from your careworn countenance, +that it is no common occurrence which has brought you here. Sit down: +you seem in distress; and if it is in my power to afford you relief, +you may be assured that I will do so." + +There was in his manner and address an affectionate kindness which +overcame me. I could neither speak nor look at him; but, laying my +head on the table, and hiding my face with my hands, I wept bitterly. +The good bishop allowed me reasonable time to recover myself, and, +with extreme good breeding, mildly requested that, if it were +possible, I would confide to him the cause of my affliction. + +"Be not afraid or ashamed, my good lad," said he, "to tell me your +sorrows. If we have temporal blessings, we do not forget that we are +but the almoners of the Lord: we endeavour to follow his example; but, +if I may judge from appearance, it is not pecuniary aid you have come +to solicit." + +"No, no," replied I; "it is not money that I want:" but, choked with +excess of feeling, I could say no more. + +"This is indeed a more important case than one of mere bodily want," +said the good man. "_That_ we might very soon supply; but there seems +something in your condition which requires our more serious attention. +I thank the Almighty for selecting me to this service; and, with his +blessing, we shall not fail of success." + +Then, going to the door, he called to a young lady, who I afterwards +found was his daughter; and, holding the door a-jar as he spoke, that +I might not be seen in my distress, said, "Caroline, my dear, write to +the duke, and beg him to excuse my dining with him to-day. Tell him +that I am kept at home by business of importance; and give orders that +I be not interrupted on any account." + +He then turned the key in the door; and, drawing a chair close to +mine, begged me, in the most persuasive manner, to tell him every +thing without reserve, in order that he might apply such a remedy as +the case seemed to demand. + +I first asked for a glass of wine, which was instantly brought; he +received it at the door, and gave it to me with his own hand. + +Having drank it, I commenced the history of my life in a brief +outline, and ultimately told him all; nearly as much in detail as I +have related it to the reader. He listened to me with an intense and +painful interest, questioning me as to my feelings on many important +occasions; and having at length obtained from me an honest and candid +confession, without any extenuation, + +"My young friend," said he, "your life has been one of peculiar +temptation and excess. Much to deplore, much to blame, and much to +repent of; but the state of feeling which induced you to come to me, +is a proof that you now only require that which, with God's help, I +trust I shall be able to supply. It is now late, and we both of us +require some refreshment. I will order in dinner, and you must send to +the inn for your portmanteau." + +Perceiving that I was about to answer, "I must take no denial," +resumed he. "You have placed yourself under my care as your physician, +and you must follow my prescriptions. My duty is as much more +important, compared to the doctor's, as the soul is to the body." + +Dinner being served, he dismissed the servants as soon as possible, +and then asked me many questions relative to my family, all of which I +answered without reserve. He once mentioned Miss Somerville; but I was +so overcome, that he perceived my distress, and, filling me a glass of +wine, changed the subject. + +If I thought that any words of mine could do justice to the persuasive +discourses of this worthy bishop, I would have benefited the world by +making them public; but I could not do this; and I trust that none of +my readers will have so much need of them as I had myself. I shall, +therefore, briefly state, that I remained in the palace ten days, in +the most perfect seclusion. + +Every morning the good bishop dedicated two or three hours to my +instruction and improvement; he put into my hands one or two books +at a time, with marks in them, indicating the pages which I ought to +consult. He would have introduced me to his family; but this I begged, +for a time, to decline, being too much depressed and out of spirits; +and he indulged me in my request of being allowed to continue in the +apartments allotted to me. + +On the seventh morning, he came to me, and after a short conversation, +informed me that business would require his absence for two or three +days, and that he would give me a task to employ me during the short +time he should be gone. He then put into my hand a work on the +sacrament. "This," said he, "I am sure you will read with particular +attention, so that on my return I may invite you to the feast." I +trembled as I opened the book. "Fear not, Mr Mildmay," said he; "I +tell you, from what I see of your symptoms, that the cure will be +complete." + +Having said this, he gave me his blessing, and departed. He returned +exactly at the end of three days, and after a short examination, said +he would allow me to receive the sacrament, and that the holy ceremony +should take place in his own room privately, well knowing how much +affected I should be. He brought in the bread and wine; and having +consecrated and partaken of them himself, agreeably to the forms +prescribed, he made a short extempore prayer in my behalf. + +When he had done this, he advanced towards me, and presented the +bread. My blood curdled as I took it in my mouth; and when I had +tasted the wine, the type of the blood of that Saviour, whose wounds +I had so often opened afresh in my guilty career, and yet upon the +merits of which I now relied for pardon, I felt a combined sensation +of love, gratitude and joy--a lightness and buoyancy of spirits, as if +I could have left the earth below me, disburthened of a weight +that had, till then, crushed me to the ground. I felt that I had +faith--that I was a new man--and that my sins were forgiven; and, +dropping my head on the side of the table, I remained some minutes in +grateful and fervent prayer. + +The service being ended, I hastened to express my acknowledgments to +my venerable friend. + +"I am but the humble instrument, my dear young friend," said the +bishop; "let us both give thanks to the almighty Searcher of hearts. +Let us hope that the work is perfect--for then, you will be the +occasion of 'joy in heaven.' And now," continued he, "let me ask you +one question. Do you feel in that state of mind that you could bear +any affliction which might befall you, without repining?" + +"I trust, Sir," answered I, "that I could bear it, not only +cheerfully, but thankfully; and I now acknowledge that it is good for +me that I have been in trouble." + +"Then all is right," said he; "and with such feelings I may venture to +give you this letter, which I promised the writer to deliver with my +own hand." + +As soon as my eye caught the superscription, "Gracious Heaven!" +exclaimed I; "it is from my Emily." + +"Even so," said the bishop. + +I tore it open. It contained only six lines, which were as follows:-- + +"Our mutual kind friend, the bishop, has proved to me how proud and +how foolish I have been. Forgive me, dear Frank, for I too have +suffered much; and come as soon as possible to your ever affectionate + +"EMILY." + +This, then, was the object of the venerable bishop's absence. Bending +beneath age and infirmity, he had undertaken a journey of three +hundred miles, in order to ensure the temporal as well as eternal +welfare of a perfect stranger--to effect a reconciliation, without +which he saw that my worldly happiness was incomplete. I was +afterwards informed, that notwithstanding the weight of his character +and holy office, he had found Emily more decided in her rejection than +he had anticipated; and it was not until he had sharply rebuked her +for her pride and unforgiving temper, that she could be brought to +listen with patience to his arguments. But having at length convinced +her that the tenure of her own hopes depended on her forgiveness of +others, she relented, acknowledged the truth of his remarks, and her +undiminished affection for me. While she made this confession, she was +in the same position before the bishop, that I was when I received her +letter--on my knees, and in tears. + +He gave me his hand, raised me up, "And, now, my young friend," +said he, "let me give you one caution. I hope and I trust that your +repentance is sincere. If it be not, the guilt must rest on your head; +but I trust in God that all is as it should be. I will not, therefore, +detain you any longer: you must be impatient to be gone. Refreshment +is prepared for you: my horses will take you the first stage. Have you +funds sufficient to carry you through? for it is a long journey, as my +old bones can testify." + +I assured him that I was sufficiently provided; and, expressing my +thanks for his kindness, wished that it was in my power to prove my +gratitude. "Put me to the test, my lord," said I, "if you possibly +can." + +"Well, then," replied he, "I will: when the day for your union with +Miss Somerville is fixed, allow me to have the pleasure of joining +your hands, should it please God to spare me so long. I have removed +the disease; but I must trust to somebody else to watch and prevent a +relapse. And believe me, my dear friend, however well-inclined a man +may be to keep in the straight path, he gains no little support from +the guidance and example of a lovely and virtuous woman." + +I promised readily all he asked; and having finished a slight lunch, +again shook hands with the worthy prelate, jumped into my carriage, +and drove off. I travelled all night; and the next day was in the +society of those I loved, and who had ever loved me, in spite of all +my perverseness and folly. + +A few weeks after, Emily and I were united by the venerable bishop, +who, with much emotion, gave us his benediction; and as the prayer of +the righteous man availeth much, I felt that it was recorded in our +favour in Heaven. Mr Somerville gave the bride away. My father, with +Talbot and Clara, were present; and the whole of us, after all my +strange vicissitudes, were deeply affected at this reconciliation and +union. + + + +***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK FRANK MILDMAY*** + + +******* This file should be named 13010-8.txt or 13010-8.zip ******* + + +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: +https://www.gutenberg.org/1/3/0/1/13010 + + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, +set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to +copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to +protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. 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