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diff --git a/old/12483.txt b/old/12483.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..8b3559a --- /dev/null +++ b/old/12483.txt @@ -0,0 +1,15523 @@ +The Project Gutenberg eBook, Reminiscences of Scottish Life and Character, +by Edward Bannerman Ramsay, et al + + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + + + + +Title: Reminiscences of Scottish Life and Character + +Author: Edward Bannerman Ramsay + +Release Date: June 1, 2004 [eBook #12483] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: US-ASCII + + +***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK REMINISCENCES OF SCOTTISH LIFE AND +CHARACTER*** + + +E-text prepared by Juliet Sutherland, Charlie Kirschner, and the Project +Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team + + + +REMINISCENCES OF SCOTTISH LIFE & CHARACTER + +BY THE LATE E. B. RAMSAY, LL.D., F.R.S.E. + +DEAN OF EDINBURGH + +Twenty-Second Edition, Enlarged, +With the Author's Latest Corrections and Additions + +And a Memoir of Dean Ramsay + +By Cosmo Innes + +1874 + + + + + + +CONTENTS. + + +MEMOIR OF DEAN RAMSAY + +PREFACE TO TWENTY-SECOND EDITION + + +CHAPTER I. + +INTRODUCTORY + + +CHAPTER II. + +SCOTTISH RELIGIOUS FEELINGS AND OBSERVANCES + + +CHAPTER III. + +ON OLD SCOTTISH CONVIVIALITY + + +CHAPTER IV. + +ON THE OLD SCOTTISH DOMESTIC SERVANT + +CHAPTER V. + +SCOTTISH JUDGES + + +CHAPTER VI. + +ON HUMOUR PROCEEDING FROM SCOTTISH EXPRESSIONS, +INCLUDING SCOTTISH PROVERBS + + +CHAPTER VII. + +ON SCOTTISH STORIES OF WIT AND HUMOUR + + +CONCLUSION + +INDEX + + + + +MEMOIR OF DEAN RAMSAY. + +I. + +The friends of Dean Ramsay desiring a memorial of his life, his friendly +publishers, and his nearest relatives, have asked me to undertake the +work, and placed in my hands some materials giving authentic facts and +dates, and illustrating the Dean's own views on the leading events +of his life. + +I feel myself excluded from dealing with one important part of such a +life, for I could not take upon me to speak with confidence or authority +upon church doctrines or church government. On the other hand, for the +_man_ I have that full sympathy which I suppose ought to exist between +the writer and the subject of the biography. + +We were very old friends, natives of the same district, bred among a +people peculiar in manners and language, a people abounding in a racy +humour, differing from what prevails in most parts of Scotland--a +peculiarity which it was the joy of the Dean to bring before his +countrymen in his _Reminiscences_; and although he and I were not +kindred of blood, his relatives and friends were very much mine, and my +uncles and aunts were also his. + +Edward Bannerman Burnett, known in after life as Edward Ramsay, and +Dean of Edinburgh, was born at Aberdeen on the last day of January 1793. +His father, Alexander, second son of Sir Thomas Burnett, Baronet, of +Leys, was an advocate, and sheriff of Kincardineshire, where the family +estates lay. The sheriff was of delicate constitution, and travelled in +the south of Europe for his health, until obliged to fly from the French +Revolution; and at Aberdeen, the first place where he and his wife +stopped, Edward was born. The Dean's mother was Elizabeth, the elder +daughter of Sir Alexander Bannerman of Elsick, and she and her sister +Mary, afterwards Mrs. Russell, were co-heirs of his estates in the +pretty valley of the Feugh, including the whole parish of Strachan, of +which the southern part, looking over into the _How_ of the Mearns, was +Mrs. Burnett's portion; the northern, with the beautiful bank of Dee +where Blackhall stands, falling to Mrs. Russell. Both sisters were +eminently handsome. I have a tradition of the young ladies, when they +first came from their York school to Edinburgh, being followed and gazed +at by passengers in the streets, for their beauty; and there are many +still living in Edinburgh who long after gazed with admiration on the +fine old lady, the Dean's mother, bending over her embroidery frame in +her window in Darnaway Street. + +Alexander Burnett and his wife Elizabeth Bannerman had a large family. +Edward, the fourth son, when very young, was taken by his grand-uncle, +Sir Alexander Ramsay, and sent to school near his own house at Harlsey +in Yorkshire. Edward's first school, to which he was sent in 1801, made +a remarkable impression upon the Dean's memory. "I believe," he says, +"at that period (the very beginning of the century) it was about the +most retired village in England not of a mountainous district. No +turnpike road went through the parish. It lay in the line of no +thoroughfare. The only inhabitants of education were the clergyman, a +man of great simplicity of character, who had never been at the +University, and my great-uncle, of above fourscore, and a recluse. The +people were uneducated to an extent now unusual. Nearly all the letters +of the village were written by my uncle's gardener, a Scotchman, who, +having the degree of education usual with his countrymen of the +profession, and who being very good natured, had abundant occupation for +his evenings, and being, moreover, a prudent man, and _safe_, became the +depository of nine-tenths of the family secrets of the inhabitants. +Being thus ignorant generally, and few of them ever having been twenty +miles from the place, I may consider the parish fifty years behind the +rest of the world when I went there, so that it now furnishes +recollection of rural people, of manners and intelligence, dating back a +hundred years from the present time. It was indeed a very primitive +race; and it is curious to recall the many indications afforded in that +obscure village of unmitigated ignorance. With all this were found in +full exercise also the more violent and vindictive passions of our +nature. They might have the simplicity, but not the virtues, of +Arcadia.... There were some old English customs of an interesting +nature which lingered in the parish. For example, the old habit of +bowing to the altar was retained by the rustics on entering church, and +bowing respectfully to the clergyman in his place. A copy of the +Scriptures was in the vestry _chained_ to the desk on which it lay, and +where it had evidently been since that mode of introducing the Bible was +practised in the time of Edward VI. The passing bell was always sounded +on notice of the death of a parishioner, and sounded at any hour, night +or day, immediately on the event happening. One striking custom +prevailed at funerals. The coffin was borne through the village to the +churchyard by six or eight bearers of the same age and sex as the +deceased. Thus young maidens in white carried the remains of the girl +with whom they had lately sported. Boys took their playfellow and +companion to the churchyard. The young married woman was borne by +matrons; the men of middle age did the same office for their +contemporary.... The worship of the little church was, as may be +supposed, extremely simple, and yet even there innovation and refinement +had appeared in the musical department. The old men who used to execute +the psalmody, with the clerk at their head, had been superseded. A +teacher of singing had been engaged, and a choir, consisting of maidens, +boys and men, executed various sacred pieces with the assistance of a +bassoon and violin. I recollect in the church a practice which would +have shocked the strict rubricians of the present day. Whenever banns of +marriage were proclaimed, immediately after the words 'This is the +first, second, or third time of asking,' the old clerk shouted out, 'God +speed them weel.' In nothing was the primitive and simple character of +the people more remarkable than in the social position of the clergy +amongst them. The livings were all small, so that there was no +temptation for ecclesiastics of birth and high position in society to +come there. The clergy were in many cases clergy only on Sundays, and +for Sunday duty. The rest of the week they were like their people; +engaged in agriculture or horse-breeding, they lived with their +servants, and were scarcely raised above the position of farmers. To +show the primitive manners of many clergymen, I may mention the case of +an usher in my school, who was also curate. He enjoyed the euphonious +name of Caleb Longbottom. I recollect his dialect--pure Yorkshire; his +coat a black one only on Sunday, as I suppose he was on week days +wearing out his old blue coat which he had before going into orders. +Lord Macaulay has been charged that in describing the humble social +condition of the clergy in the reign of Charles II., he has greatly +exaggerated their want of refinement and knowledge of the world; but +really, from my recollection of my friend Mr. Longbottom and others at +the time I speak of, in the reign of George III., I cannot think he has +overdrawn the picture. Suppose this incident at a table in our own +time:--My uncle lived in what is called in Yorkshire the Hall; and being +principal proprietor in the parish, he was in fact the squire or great +man. The clergy always dined at the hall after evening service, and I +recollect the first day the new curate dined. The awkwardness and +shyness of the poor man were striking, even to the eyes of a thoughtless +schoolboy. He summoned courage to call for beer, and, according to the +old custom, deemed it necessary to drink the health of all present +before he put the glass to his lips. He addressed first the old +gentleman, then the vicar, then myself, and finally, with equal +solemnity, drank to the servants in attendance--the old butler and +coachman, who were waiting upon the company[1]." + +I value these reminiscences of his Yorkshire school, written long after, +because I think them very curious; and they show how early Edward Ramsay +had his eyes open to characteristic features of the people. + +Ramsay's grand-uncle, the old Sir Alexander Ramsay, died in 1806, +neglecting to make the provision which he had intended for his +grand-nephew, but leaving his estates to his nephew, Edward's father, +who then gave up his sheriffship (in which he was succeeded by Adam +Gillies), and being a Whig and of Whig family, accepted a baronetcy from +Mr. Fox, and made Fasque his home for the short remainder of his life. + +The future Dean was not fortunate in schools. On his father's succeeding +to the family estates he quitted Harlsey indeed, but only to move to +Durham, which left no more pleasant memories in his mind than the other, +although there he learned to blow the flute, and indulge his strong +musical taste. He writes of Durham school that it had fallen off +terribly, from the increasing infirmities of the head master, and Ramsay +was anxious to leave it, when that move came naturally by the death of +his father[2]. Writing in his journal some time afterwards, he says, +"What was I to do? I was determined to go into the Church, and must go +to college. How was the intermediate period to be spent?" His first +private tutor was the Rev. J.H. Browne, at Kegworth in Leicestershire, +afterwards Archdeacon of Ely. "Here," says Edward, "I did learn +something both of books and of the world. Browne was a scholar, and my +fellow-students were gentlemen and knew something of life." He next +lived for a time with Mr. Joynes, a clergyman, at Sandwich in Kent, and +went from thence, in October 1811, to Cambridge. + +He entered as a pensioner at St. John's, and although professing to be a +reading man, he was not eminently satisfied with the effects of the +society into which he fell upon his habits and accomplishments. "Not," +he says, "that I had not really good associates, but somehow it seems +not to have been the best and such as I might have had." Another defect +was his not having a skilful and effective private tutor at a time when +he felt that he stood specially in need of one. "I could not form my +reading habits alone, and I had not sufficient help. I did enough, +however, to show I was not an ass. I got a scholarship. I was twice in +goodish places in the first class. I had a name for flute-playing;" and +then, ending this retrospect, which he wrote with some disgust, he tells +how he left Cambridge in his third year, going out B.A. with no contest +for honours. His college vacations were spent either in London with +college friends, or with a reading party under Wilkinson, the tutor, at +Redcar. In gathering up his recollections, he says he saw a good deal of +society: one summer was very musical; of another which he spent at home +he enumerates his occupations--"botany," "music," "Deeside." Through +all, his study was theology, but in "small doses" he says. His brother +Marmaduke joined him on the Christmas holiday of 1816, when they worked +together at the cryptogamics, and then went up to Cambridge +together--Edward to renew his theological studies with the help of the +formal lectures at the University. He spent the remainder of that season +at Bath with friends and relatives. He speaks of the Bath society, its +gaiety, theatricals, music--some rich clergymen giving good dinners, and +brother Marmaduke coming for his long vacation to a farm-house two miles +from Bath, "where we had some good botanical fun. Can it be that the +finding a new plant put us in a state of ecstasy? How we treasured up +specimens! How we gloried in our collections! But it has all passed +away; no chord is touched." To some, who think of the Dean as the +reverend, pious, grave, even melancholy man, these youthful +reminiscences may appear unnatural, even unworthy. I must own that there +breaks out now and then in his journal something which shows that he +himself was not satisfied with many of these juvenile memoranda, as if +they showed unfitting occupation and education of a young clergyman. But +that was not their real nature. Those small studies and accomplishments +took the place in his early training which the cricket-match or the +boat-race now take in the school time of Young England. The Dean speaks +somewhat contemptuously--"Here I got a smattering of astronomy," and +again of his studies of cryptogamics and botany; but he nevertheless +felt the full benefit of such accomplishments. His music, his passion +for rural and especially Highland scenery, the enjoyments of society, +the love of seeing others happy, the joining of happiness with goodness, +made the Dean what he was in after life, and enabled him to take that +position amongst his countrymen which a purely theological upbringing +would not have done. + +But now our young cleric was to put away childish things, and to take +upon him the duty of his high calling. He was ordained at Wells, and +officiated for the first time as curate of Rodden, near Frome, Somerset, +on Christmas day 1816. + +Rodden is a very small village, of one or two farms and some labourers' +cottages, nestling round the little church, with a few, very few, +outlying houses or farms. It lies among meadows on each side of the +rivulet which runs through the village. One of the outlying houses is +"Styles Hill," inhabited by one family of the Sheppards, all of whom +soon became dear friends of the Dean. Another was the "Pear-tree" +Cottage, an uninteresting red brick house, where Mr. Rogers provided a +residence for the young curate. The incumbent of the parish, when Ramsay +went there, was the Rev. John Methwen Rogers of Berkley, who was +non-resident. The duties of Rodden were too small to employ his whole +time, and in the following year (1817) Ramsay became curate also of +Buckland Dinham, the rector of which was non-resident and lived at a +distance, so that the curate had the sole charge of the parish. In his +work at Buckland, Ramsay took great delight, and soon won the hearts of +his people, although many of them were Wesleyan Methodists of the old +type[3]. But it was not only amongst the peasantry that Ramsay was +beloved. All the upper and middle classes in his own little parishes, +and through the whole valley, regarded him with strong esteem and +affection, and amongst them were persons whose character, and even whose +little peculiarities of language, he caught and remembered. One of +these, a retired Captain Balne, although he failed in prevailing on the +young clergyman to take a glass of grog, his own favourite cure for all +ailments, was pleased when the curate came to take a dish of tea with +him and his gentle wife. Once, when Ramsay was ill, the grief in the +parish was universal; but he used to say that the greatest proof of +attachment was given by Captain Balne, who happened to be enjoying his +dinner when the news of his friend's illness reached him, upon which he +laid down his knife and fork, and declared he could not take another +mouthful. Captain Balne had a peculiar phraseology. One phrase, in +particular, was, "If I may be allowed the language," which came readily +on all occasions. If he was asked "How is Mrs. Balne to-day?" the +Captain would reply, "She is quite well, I thank you, Mr. Ramsay, if I +may be allowed the language;" or ask him, "Have you a good crop of +apples this year?" "Pretty middling, sir, if I may be allowed the +language." The constant recurrence of the phrase struck Mr. Ramsay, who +quoted it long after in his letters to his Frome friends--"I am glad to +say my congregation at St John's continues good--if I may be allowed the +language." + +Buckland is a larger village than Rodden, containing nearly 500 +inhabitants. The two places are five miles apart. Buckland is on the +brow and slope of a steep hill, the church being on the summit, and the +irregular street descending from it on the Frome side, with many +cottages scattered about among orchards and meadows. So the curate of +Buckland, living at the Pear-tree Cottage in Rodden, required a pony for +locomotion, which he showed with some pride to his neighbours on first +buying it. It was an iron-gray, and a sedate clerical pony enough, to +which he gave the name of Rumplestiltskin, after one of Grimm's popular +stories; and whenever he spoke of him or to him, he gave him his name at +full length. The country and some of the places round Buckland are very +interesting. On the west is one of the entrances to Vallis, a grassy +valley bordered by limestone rocks, and trees and copse, with a +trout-stream winding through it. There, when the labours of the day were +done, the Sheppards and he would spend a summer afternoon sketching and +botanising, whilst tea was prepared at a neighbouring farm. + +Vallis opened into several other vales, and on the heights above were +the picturesque villages of Elm and Skells, and the ruined nunnery and +massive old castle, the old seat of Delameres, renowned for a defence in +the Cromwellian wars. Mr. Ramsay proposed in jest to fit up the castle +as a dwelling, and bring all his friends to live there. Another time he +was for fitting it up as a museum. It would make, he said, a splendid +place for a _hortus siccus_--a "great ornament to our ponds and +ditches[4]." The writer of these trifles excuses herself for collecting +them, because she knew the value which is attached to the least of the +sayings and doings of a departed friend; but we are assured, that even +in those Arcadian regions life was not always holiday. There was some +serious work. The curate took great pains on the future interests as +well as the characters of his little flock. + +In one family he acted the part of the truest of friends--gently +reproving the little ones when they deserved it, and ready to amuse +when it was the time for amusement--sometimes taking them to Bath for +the day, and making them very happy, bestowing at the same time great +pains on their instruction--sometimes practising music with them, and +accompanying their sonatas on his incomparable flute--recommending to +the governess a higher style of music, leading them on gradually to the +works of Beethoven and Mozart. By and by he gave them instructions in +architecture; taught them, as he said, all that he had learned from +Rickman. His teaching was minutely technical. He would assemble his +class in a little morning room, with books before them, and a case of +mathematical instruments, pens and pencils. His pupils wrote what he saw +fit to dictate, and he taught them how to use the compasses. Next came +botany, which was not a new study to his pupils. There his brothers +assisted him. They made a joint _hortus siccus_ under his instruction. +Edwin contributed many specimens from Scotland, and Marmaduke made a +little collection of mosses. But they had to thank the curate for yet +higher and better instruction. His younger pupils were not excluded from +the most earnest conversations between him and Mr. Algar, Mr. John +Sheppard, and some friends of the neighbouring gentlemen and clergy. In +these conversations books were read and criticised, theological and +other subjects, including some politics, were discussed. Ramsay was +quizzed for Whiggish tendencies. The mistress of the house usually +joined and set them right in politics, for she had been brought up in +Plymouth during the French war, and had learned the old-fashioned Tory +doctrine, and to think any other politics sinful. But all those high +subjects of politics and religion were discussed with fitting respect; +for that society--young and old--had a deep sense of religion, and the +parents encouraged the younger members to visit and instruct the workmen +and their families who were employed in the large cloth manufactories of +the Sheppards; so that it came to pass that every man, woman, and child +was taught or helped to teach others, for in those days very few of the +working-people, at least in that part of England, could read at all. A +lending library was attached to the mills. A large Sunday school was +formed, chiefly for the children of the workpeople, and additional +services were undertaken by the curate--a second sermon on Sundays +besides one on Thursday evenings, where the families of the +neighbourhood attended, and as many of the servants as could be spared. +There, be sure, was no big talk on the primary obligation of orthodoxy, +no attempts to proselytise. But all classes of that primitive people +valued his preaching, and farmers and their labourers, the workmen of +the factories, as well as their masters, took advantage of it. His +brothers often visited him, and joined heartily in his pursuits whether +gay or serious. It was delightful to see the three brothers so happy in +each other's society, and helping on a worthy common object. Marmaduke, +the Cambridge man, would talk astronomy, and William, the sailor, +afterwards Admiral Ramsay, brought down a fine telescope, and himself +gave them their first lesson in practical astronomy, handing over the +instrument when he left to his brother the curate, that he might +continue the instruction. + +During all these years of useful, cheerful, happy employment at Frome, +Edward Ramsay never forgot the land of his forefathers and of his own +youth. He sometimes visited Bath and London to hear Edward Irving +preach, to see Kean act, to stare at old books and prints in the shop +windows, to revel in the beauties of Kew Gardens; but every summer he +found time for a visit to Scotland, and spent his holiday with boyish +delight amongst the scenes and friends of his childhood. + +It was on one of those visits to Scotland, in the autumn of 1822, whilst +Mr. Ramsay was spending his holidays among his friends on Deeside, that +the managers of St. Paul's Chapel, Aberdeen, offered him the place of +second minister to that congregation, along with Mr. Cordiner. He was +much gratified, and would gladly have accepted the appointment. He liked +the place--his native town; thought highly of the respectability of the +congregation; but there was one objection, which to him was insuperable. +The congregation had for some time been Episcopal only in name, and it +went against Mr. Ramsay's conscience to minister in a church calling +itself Episcopal, but without the communion or discipline of a bishop. +He explained to the managers his objection, and thought for a time it +might be overcome by a union with the Scotch Episcopal churches in the +diocese. He had yet to learn the strength, of the Scotch prejudice +against bishops; perhaps to learn that the more shadowy the grounds of +dispute, so much the more keenly are ecclesiastical squabbles fought. +Worthy Bishop Skinner would have been glad to have Ramsay a +fellow-labourer in his city upon whatever conditions. Yet he could not +contradict his younger friend's honest and temperate adherence to his +principles and to Episcopacy. The correspondence all round, which I have +before me, is quite decorous; but after Ramsay had stated his objection, +and that it was insuperable, the managers wrote to him, 1st October +1822, that "a unanimous election would follow if he accepted the +situation under the present establishment." It would have been easy to +divide the congregation, but this did not suit Ramsay's feelings or +nature, and he courteously bowed to the decision of the managers, and +returned to Frome, where his income from both curacies was L100 a +year,--a poverty the more irksome to a man of culture and +refined tastes. + +Not long after (still, I think in 1823), the Journal records--"Mrs. +Forbes, my aunt, had just come into her accession of fortune, and +presented me with L5000. A man may live many days in this world, and not +meet the like gift in a like kindly spirit[5]." + +Of the year 1823 the Journal remarks very severe winter. "Marmaduke and +Edwin with me at the Pear-tree[6]; a delightful tour in South Wales with +the Sheppards and other friends most agreeable and +good-humoured,--botany, sketching, talk, and fun. Life has few things to +offer more enjoyable than such tours. I have found in them the happiest +hours in my life." And then follows the wail for so "many of them +departed; so many dear good friends; all different, but all excellent!" + +Marmaduke having gone as tutor to Lord Lansdowne's eldest son, Edward +was more free to consider an offer from Edinburgh, and ultimately +accepted the curacy of St. George's in York Place, under Mr. Shannon. He +preached his two last sermons at Rodden and Buckland on Christmas +day 1823. + +FOOTNOTES: + +[1] _Reminiscences_ (Second Series, 1861). Introduction. + +[2] May 10, 1810. + +[3] Some account of his dealings among the Methodists may be found in +the _Sunday Magazine_, January 1865, edited by the Rev. Dr. Guthrie. The +paper is titled "Reminiscences of a West of England Curacy." + +[4] This was a favourite quotation of Ramsay's, who was amused with the +remark of Withering's or Woodward's botany, repeated in his letters for +long after:--"The organ at St. John's gives universal satisfaction--a +great ornament to our ponds and ditches." + +[5] Mrs. Forbes, the sister and aunt of so many Burnetts and Ramsays, +lived the latter part of her life at Banchory Lodge, in the middle of +that "Deeside" country, where the future Dean spent many of his happy +holidays, and learned much of the peculiar ways of that peculiar people. +There were no two ladies in Scotland more esteemed and beloved than the +Dean's aunts on both sides--Mrs. Russell, his aunt and mine, living in +widowhood at Blackhall, and Mrs. Forbes at Banchory Lodge, three miles +apart, on the opposite banks of Dee. Mrs. Forbes died 1st February 1838. + +[6] His dwelling near Frome. + + + +II. + +The Dean was passionately fond of Deeside. Let me indulge myself in +looking back upon that district such as he knew it, such as I remember +it sixty years ago. + +The natural features of Deeside are not changed. The noble river pours +down its brown flood as of old, hurrying from its wooded rocky +highlands. On the prettiest part of its bank stands Crathes, the finest +of Aberdeenshire castles, the immemorial seat of the Burnetts, where +Edward Ramsay, himself a Burnett, was received with all the love of +kindred, as well as the hearty respect for his sacred profession. I +daresay Crathes was not to him quite what I remember it. But we were of +different professions and habits. I will say nothing of the chief sport +of Dee, its salmon-fishing. However fascinating, the rod is a silent +companion, and wants the jovial merriment, shout and halloo, that give +life and cheerfulness to the sport of the hunter. My recollection of +Deeside is in its autumn decking, and shows me old Sir Robert and my +lady, two gentle daughters and four tall stalwart sons--they might have +sat for a group of Osbaldistones to the great painter Walter Scott. I +will not describe the interior of the old house, partly because it was +changing, and every change appeared to me for the worse; but no one +would forget the old hall, where Kneller's picture of Bishop Burnett +still looks down on his modern cousins and their hospitality. It was a +frank and cordial hospitality, of which the genial old bishop would +have approved. The viands were homely almost to affectation. Every day +saw on that board a noble joint of boiled beef, not to the exclusion of +lighter kickshaws; but the beef was indispensable, just as the _bouilli_ +still is in some provinces of France. Claret was there in plenty--too +plentiful perhaps; but surely the "braw drink" was well bestowed, for +with it came the droll story, the playful attack and ready retort, the +cheerful laugh--always good humour. A dinner at Crathes was what the +then baronet, old Sir Robert, would call the "best of good company." + +Another part of the house I well remember--the place, half gun-room, +half servant's hall--where we prepared for sport in the morning, and +brought the day's bag home at night. Prominent figures there were two +brothers Stevenson, Willie and Jamie, known for twenty miles round as +the "fox-hunters," known to us, after the southern sporting slang had +been brought among us by our neighbour Captain Barclay, as +"Pad-the-hoof" and "Flash-the-muzzle[7]" The fox-hunting was on foot, +but let no mounted hunter sneer. The haunts of the game were continuous +woods and bogs, hard to ride and from which no fox could be forced to +break. "Pad-the-hoof" looked no ignoble sportsman as he cheered his +great slow-hounds through the thicket, and his halloo rang from the +wood of Trustach to the craigs of Ashintillie. Both were armed, but +"Flash" took less charge of the hounds than seeing to death the fox, the +enemy of all, including the roe, which recent plantations had raised +into an enemy. I must say nothing on foot or wing came amiss to +Flash-the-muzzle's gun. Hares and rabbits, not then the pest of the +country, swelled our bag. We had a moderate number of black game, and +the fox-hunters were somewhat astonished to find that we of the gentry +set much store by woodcock, which bulked so little in the day's sport. +The fox-hunter brothers had the run of the servants' hall at Crathes, +and they were said to have consumed fabulous numbers of kitchen pokers, +which required to be heated red-hot to give the jugs of ale of their +evening draught the right temperature and flavour. That was a +free-living community. The gentlemen of the house were too much +gentlemen to stand upon their dignity, and all, from the baronet +downwards, had the thorough appreciation of Deeside humour. It was there +that the Dean learned his stories of "Boatie" and other worthies of the +river-side. Boatie himself was Abernethy, the ferryman of Dee below +Blackhall; he hauled his boat across the river by a rope made fast at +both ends. Once, in a heavy water, the rope gave way, and Boatie in his +little craft was whirled down the raging river and got ashore with much +difficulty. It was after this, when boasting of his valiant exertions, +that Mrs. Russell put him in mind of the gratitude he owed to Providence +for his escape, and was answered as the Dean himself tells us in his +_Reminiscences_. Another of the water-side worthies, "Saunders Paul," +was nominally the keeper of the public-house at Invercannie, where the +water of Cannie falls into Dee. It was the alehouse of the country, but +frequented much more by the gentry than by the commons. It was there +that Mr. Maule in his young days, not yet Lord Panmure, led the riots +and drank his claret, while Saunders capped him glass for glass with +whisky and kept the company in a roar with Deeside stories. Old +Saunders--I remember him like yesterday--was not a mere drunken sot or a +Boniface of the hostelry. He had lived a long lifetime among men who did +not care to be toadied, and there was a freedom and ready wit in the old +man that pleased everybody who was worth pleasing. Above all, there was +the Deeside humour which made his stories popular, and brought them to +the ear of our Dean. + +That was the left side--the Crathes bank of Dee. Across the river was +the somewhat dilapidated fortalice of Tilquhillie, the seat of an +ancient and decayed branch of the Douglases. The last laird who dwelt +there lived in the traditions of Deeside as own brother to the Laird of +Ellangowan in Scott's romance. Ramsay has put him well on canvas. Who +does not remember his dying instructions to his son and his grieve?--"Be +ye aye stickin' in a tree, Johnny; it will be growin' when ye are +sleepin'!" while he cautions the grieve, "Now mind that black park; it +never gied me onything, ne'er gie onything to it." + +In the days when the Dean knew that Water-side the fortalice was +uninhabited, and I think not habitable for gentlefolks; but down on the +haugh below, and close to the river in a pretty garden-cottage, dwelt +the old Lady Tilquhillie, with her son the sheriff of the county, George +Douglas, whom a few Edinburgh men may yet remember as the man of wit and +pleasure about town, the _beau_ of the Parliament House--at home a kind +hospitable gentleman, looking down a little upon the rough humours that +pleased his neighbours. The old lady--I think she was a Dutch woman, or +from the Cape of Good Hope--and her old servant, Sandy M'Canch, +furnished the Dean with many a bit of Deeside life and humour; and are +they not written in the _Reminiscences!_ + +Higher up the river were two houses where the Dean was much +beloved--Banchory Lodge, his uncle General Burnett's, where also lived +his dear aunt, the widowed Mrs. Forbes; and Blackhall, where, in the +time I have in my mind, lived his aunt, Mrs. Russell, the widow of my +uncle Francis Russell, a woman of many sorrows, but whose sweet voice +and silver laugh brought joy into the house even amidst sickness and +sorrow[8]. She had not the Deeside language, but she and her sister Lady +Ramsay, Yorkshire women, and educated in the city of York, helped to +give the Dean that curious northern English talk which he mixed +pleasantly with the language of Angus and Mearns that he loved so well; +and he inherited from the Bannermans the sweet voice, so valuable an +inheritance to a preacher. + +I have gone over less than a dozen miles of the valley of the Dee, which +was the Dean's Deeside. I think the manners and popular thought, as well +as the language of that little district, were peculiar, and fitted to +catch the attention of an eager student of human nature and character. +Deeside, in its wider acceptance, of course includes the great city at +its mouth, and the picturesque mountains of Mar near the source of the +river, where the Queen has now set her mark of favour on the land. I beg +to distinguish Deeside--the Dean's Deeside--lying between these. The +city of Aberdeen, with its trade and manufacture and wealth, with its +University and schools, and some tradition of the antique metropolis, +has established, as she had good right, habits and language of her own, +not to be mistaken, but almost confined to her own walls. On the other +hand, the mountains of Mar, where lie the springs of the Dee, where +tower Lochnagar and Benmacdhui, are inhabited by a race of shepherds and +hunters, speaking a different language, differing in manners from the +Dean's friends, who dwelt from the Hill of Fair to Ashintillie, where +hardly a Gaelic name occurs among the peasantry. + +The little cluster of mansions which I have mentioned lies, I think, +wholly within the parish of Banchory-Ternan. Following the river down +from that parish, the next place of any importance is the old +manor-house of Durris, some half-dozen miles lower, and on the right +bank of the river. It is a place of some interest to lawyers for having +given rise to one of the leading cases on the law of entail, which +settled points that had formerly been doubtful, all in favour of the +strict entail. The victim in that case, ejected by the heir of entail, +was John Innes, who had sold his property in Moray to invest the produce +in the great barony of Durris. The new tenant, believing himself almost +proprietor, built a comfortable house under the walls of the old castle, +and in that house was born the writer of these notes. I do not feel +myself severed by any disgusts from the country of my youth where I +spent my best years, or at least the years of most enjoyment. It was +then a wild moor, with some natural beauty, a picturesque den leading +from the house to the noble river, wooded with native birch and scrubby +oak, with some tall larches and magnificent horse-chestnuts, and even a +few immemorial Spanish chestnuts planted by the old Peterboroughs, now +all gone. Along that river bank were some of the broadest haughs with +which I am acquainted, and some of the best salmon streams, then woods +and sheep pastures and a dozen miles of heather hills--up to +Cairn-monearn and Kerloach--giving the best grouse-shooting in the +country. It is in truth a charming water-side even in the eyes of a +critical old man, or of a tourist in search of the picturesque; but for +a boy who lived there, shot, and fished there, while all the houses +round were the dwellings of cousins and friends, while game was not yet +let for hire, it was a place to win that boy's heart, and I loved it +very heartily. We were the nearest neighbours on one side of that +cluster of residences of the Burnetts and Douglases and Russells which I +have tried to describe. We were all very good friends, and thus the Dean +and I were early acquainted. + +I have said little of the Dean's ancestors, merely named the Burnetts +and Bannermans. Indeed I would guard against loading my memoir of the +Dean with anything like mere pedigree. I take no interest in his +ancestry, except in so far as they may have given a character--so far as +he may have inherited his personal qualities from them. I will not dwell +then upon Alexander de Burnard, who had his charter from Robert the +Bruce of the Deeside lands which his descendants still hold, nor even on +the first Lairds of Leys. When the Reformation blazed over Scotland, the +Baron of Leys and his kindred favoured and led the party that supported +the new faith; but, even in that iconoclastic age, two of them are found +protesting against the destruction of religious places at Aberdeen. One, +Gilbert Burnett (he was grand-uncle of the Bishop of Sarum), enjoyed +considerable reputation abroad for certain philosophical writings. He +was Professor of Philosophy, first at Basle and afterwards at Montauban, +and a general synod of the French Protestants desired that his works +should be printed at the expense of the synod. These _Dissertationes +Ethicae_ were accordingly published at Leyden in 1649; but his death +prevented his other writings from being published. Two brothers of the +same generation, Thomas and Duncan, settled in England as physicians, +and seem to have been men of literary eminence. Pedigrees of both are to +be found in the Herald's Visitations of Essex and Norfolk. Duncan, +Thomas, and Gilbert, are all noticed by Sir Thomas Middleton among the +"Learned Men and Writers of Aberdeen;" and Duncan is noted as a holy, +good, and learned man. In the stirring times of the Covenants, Sir +Thomas Burnett of Leys, Baronet, though an adherent of the Huntlys, +embraced the Covenant from conscientious motives against his political +instincts and associations. And ever afterwards we find him firm in the +principles of the Covenant, yet advising peaceful and moderate counsels; +and when Montrose, after his conversion to the royal cause, passed +through Aberdeenshire, harrying the lands of the leading Covenanters, he +supped one day at Crathes, excepted and protected Sir Thomas Burnett and +his son-in-law, Sir William Forbes of Monymusk, in the general +denunciation of the Puritans. We find Sir Thomas repeatedly a +commissioner for visiting the University of Aberdeen, and in his later +years he endowed three bursaries at King's College, his own _alma +mater_. Jamesone has painted him with a thoughtful and refined, but +earnest and manly face. The baronet's brother, James Burnett of +Craigmyle, was of the same character. No less earnest and staunch than +his brother in his adherence to his principles--he ever figures as a +peace-maker and enemy of bloodshed. He is described by the parson of +Rothiemay, an unsuspected testimony, as a "gentleman of great wisdom, +and one who favoured the King though he dwelt among the Covenanters, and +was loved and respected by all." Is it not plain that the temperance and +moderation descended in the blood of the Burnetts? + +Thomas Burnett of Kemnay, grandson of Craigmyle, is known in a sphere +where few Scotsmen had entered. He was a courtier of that remarkable +little court of the Electress Sophia of Hanover, where he became the +friend of the philosopher Leibnitz, correspondent of the poet Dryden, +and his letters are full of curious gossip on the most various +subjects--theology, philosophy, literature, including poetry and the +small talk of the day. He was greatly employed and trusted by the +Electress Sophia. His son George was noted as an agriculturist, and his +grandson, Alexander Burnett of Kemnay (by a daughter of Sir Alexander +Burnett of Leys), was long British Secretary of embassy at Berlin, and +attended Frederick the Great in the campaigns of the Seven Years' War; +remaining at the Prussian Court as Charge d'Affaires after Sir Andrew +Mitchell's death. + +James, third son of Craigmyle the Covenanter, married a daughter of the +family of Irvine of Monboddo, a scion of the house of Drum, and having +so acquired that barony, he transmitted it to his descendants, of whom +the most famous was his great-grandson, James Burnett, Lord Monboddo, a +Judge of the Court of Session, an eminent lawyer, and a man of rare +accomplishments, with some whimsical peculiarities. In a treatise on the +origin and progress of language, he was the first seriously to assert +the descent of mankind from the monkey, and that the human race were +originally furnished with tails! That and a hundred other whimsies were +mixed up with a great deal of learning then very rare, and with a +philosophy that dealt in free and daring speculation, of which the world +was not yet worthy. + +The first baronet of Leys, besides his brother James of Craigmyle, had +yet another brother, Robert Burnett of Crimond, an eminent advocate, +very learned, and of high moral and religious principle. Though his wife +was a sister of Johnstone of Warriston, he himself, unlike his two +brothers, was an opponent of the Covenant, for which he went into exile +until the Restoration, when he was made a Judge of the Court of Session +as Lord Crimond. He had three sons by the Warriston lady. His eldest, +Sir Thomas Burnett, was physician to royalty from Charles II to Queen +Anne. The third was Gilbert, Bishop of Salisbury, of whom it is not my +intention to give any detailed account. His brilliant talents and great +influence made him many friends, and even more enemies. History is +beginning to do justice to his character without concealing his +weaknesses. He seems to have been more honest than was the fashion +in his time. + +Such is the little gathering of family history, for the accuracy of +which I am chiefly indebted to my kind friend the Lord Lyon--himself a +Burnett. Perhaps I should apologise for saying even the little I have +said of the Dean's pedigree; but while I press into my service the +country of his birth and breeding, and the local peculiarities amongst +which his life was spent, as possibly having some influence on his +character, I could not resist the wish to show another element, drawn +from his ancestry, that went to the forming of that character. Was not +our Dean a worthy representative of Puritan leaders who refused to go +into the violence of the Covenant--of the Bishop of unreproached life, +who read the Thirty-nine Articles with an unconcealed desire to include +conscientious Dissenters--of many peaceful gentlemen on the banks of the +Dee, who mixed a happy playful humour with a catholic reverence for that +Christianity which he could recognise in other sects, though +preferring his own? + +FOOTNOTES: + +[7] The present generation of Burnetts think that those slang names were +invented by Barclay, but I knew him well, and venture to doubt his +humorous powers. In the midst of "sporting" and violent excitement he +was serious in talk, as became the descendant of the old Quakers. + +[8] Mrs. Russell had lost her two sons by a strange fatality--both were +drowned, the elder, Lockhart, while skating at Bath, about 1805-6, +James, the younger, in crossing the river Dee in a boat rowed by +himself in 1827. + + + +III. + +Edward Ramsay left Somersetshire amidst the general regrets of his +parishioners and neighbours, and entered on his Edinburgh career 1st +January 1824. The journal which I am now using has not hitherto spoken +much of the differing opinions of his brother clergymen, although there +is sometimes a clergyman noted as "very low," and elsewhere, one branded +as a "concealed Papist." But in Edinburgh--it is vain to conceal +it--every profession must be broken into parties. He found Edinburgh, or +rather I should say the Episcopal Church in Edinburgh, then +theologically divided between the Evangelicals, headed by the Rev. +Edward Craig and the old-fashioned Churchmen, the rather moral school, +of which Mr. Alison was the distinguished ornament. Mr. Ramsay went to +St. George's Chapel, York Place, as Mr. Shannon's curate, in the +beginning of 1824, and remained doing that duty for two and a half +years. He then went to St. Paul's, Carrubber's Close, where he laboured +for a year. + +In 1825 Ramsay "toiled on" with sermons and wrote a series on the +Articles. "A great improvement," he says, "must have taken place in +Edinburgh, for unquestionably the sermons I then got credit for we +should all think little of now[9]." In 1826 he left Mr. Shannon's +chapel, and took the single charge of the quaint old chapel of St. +Paul's, Carrubber's Close. Amongst the events recorded of the year was +the acquaintance he made by officiating at the funeral of Lady Scott, +Sir Walter's wife. In 1827 he mentions a change, "a considerable move to +me, which, under God, has been a good one." He closed with an offer of +the curacy of St. John's, under Bishop Sandford, when he was +thirty-seven years of age. In spring he was ill, and went to visit his +old place and friends in Somerset.--"Interesting, very: received at my +old curacy of Buckland with much joy, and on the whole enjoyed my +visit." At Whitsunday 1827 he came home to enter on St. John's with +Bishop Sandford, being thus half of 1827 in Carrubber's Close and half +in St. John's. I was in Edinburgh then, and can well remember what +general favour accompanied Mr. Ramsay in church and society. Perhaps he +was not prepared for the vehemence of church dissensions among us. I do +not think there was at that time so bitter war between churchmen of the +same profession in England, but the Episcopal Church, of whatever +section, had made great progress then in Scotland. Its fine liturgy, and +more decorous ceremonial, had attracted some. Many of the heads of +country families round Edinburgh have been educated in England, and many +of them have married in England--both circumstances tending to keep up +their attachment to the Episcopal Church; and in their houses the +scholarly, accomplished, agreeable clergyman of the Episcopal Church was +a welcome guest, as well as an adviser and influential friend. + +In summer of 1827 the journal tells us his brother Marmaduke paid him a +visit. "We read some Italian--I got a notion of Dante." + +At the commencement of 1829 he enters in his journal--"This was a most +important year indeed, the year of my marriage; and what event has been +to me so joyful, so full of interesting recollections?" He tells that in +the summer a visitor came to Scotland--a friend of Lady Dalhousie, and +recommended by her to Lady Robert Kerr, at whose house they met. The +lady was Isabella Cochrane, of the well-known Canadian family; writing +in 1844 he says--"Fifteen years of close acquaintance with that lady +have taught me the best commentary upon the Scripture declaration that a +'virtuous woman is a crown to her husband.' I need not say more than +that I believe I owe mainly to her (under Providence) my comfort, +success and position here. But let this suffice. None but myself can +know my full obligations." Next year begins--"As 1829 gave me a wife, +1830 gave me a church, for on the 14th January Bishop Sandford died, and +the whole charge was offered to me, which I undertook for three years +without a curate--i.e. without a man-curate, for a most effective +assistant I had in dearest Isabella, who wrote to my dictation many a +weary hour." + +Except a little parcel of letters touching the negotiation with Bishop +Skinner, and the Aberdeen congregation in 1822, I find no letters of +Ramsay till he wrote to one of the dear old friends at Frome announcing +a visit with his wife. + + Mr. RAMSAY to Miss STUART SHEPPARD, Fromefield, Frome, + Somerset. + + 7 Albany Court, London, 9th June [1831]. + + My dear Stuart, I have been in such a whirl and such a + turmoil since I came here that I have hardly had time to + collect my scattered thoughts to write you a line. I have + seen much and heard much, but shall not attempt to give you + any account _now_, as I hope (please God) we shall meet ere + long. Mrs. Ramsay's brother-in-law, the Bishop of Nova + Scotia, is here--he preached the annual sermon for the + anniversary meeting of the Charity Children in St. Paul's. I + went as his chaplain, but of this more hereafter. He has been + very urgent upon us to protract our stay here through all + next week, but I have resisted his importunities, as I am + really desirous of taking as much time as I can at Frome. We + accordingly fix Tuesday for leaving London. We stay that day + at Windsor with a friend, come to Winchester, Romsey, + Salisbury, on Wednesday, and on Thursday the 16th, I hope to + see you all in health and comfort. Dear Stuart, I shall be + happy, really happy, to be amongst you once more. It is to me + like coming _home_. Do not wait dinner or make any + arrangements, because our hour of arrival is uncertain. We + may be detained till the evening seeing sights. Mrs. E.B.R. + eats nothing (literally), and I daresay your common dinner + may furnish _me_ with a meal. Mrs. Ramsay desires kindest + love; she is not looking well, and I hope, after the racket + here, she will improve upon Frome quiet. God bless you.--Your + affectionate + + E.B.R. + + Marked--"First visit to F.F. with wife, June 9,1831." + + Mr. RAMSAY to Miss STUART SHEPPARD, Fromefield. + + Woburn, Friday night, 1st July [1831]. + + We are sure that our very dear friends at Fromefield will be + interested in hearing of our progress and welfare, and as we + have a few extra minutes this morning, we are determined to + devote them to a party now living in the hearts of _all_ the + wanderers with whom they so lately and so grievously parted: + the _weather_ even _sympathised_ on Tuesday evening, and all + the comfort we had was in talking over individually the whole + Fromefield concern. My brother, who is _slow_ in making + friends, and shy of strangers, softened into tender + friendship under the influence of such kindness, and vows + that if he had such friends he would travel annually from + Edinburgh to see them. He has put one sprig of verbena from + Stuart in one pocket, another sprig from Jane in another + pocket, and a piece of painted glass from Elizabeth in + another pocket. How lucky it is that his dress should be so + abundantly supplied with the accommodation of so many + receptacles for reminiscences! Our next grief after leaving + you was the not seeing Cousin John! We were sadly + disappointed. We did not get into Clifton till near ten; the + rain would prevent his coming to meet us, and the next + morning we very provokingly missed each other, though Mr. + Ramsay consoled himself with writing a note. How much I hope + and trust that we are all to meet next year! We were + delighted with our drive from Chepstow to Ross--the Wye + scenery is exquisitely beautiful; we exhausted ourselves and + our epithets in exclamations, and the day seemed made for the + magnificent view from the Wynd Cliff, and then we came to + Tintern Abbey! How often we wished for our Chedder party--how + often we talked over the pleasure we would have in admiring + all this beauty with them, and how often, like spoiled + children, we wondered why all this enjoyment should not have + accompanied us to Monmouth! but good-night, my very dear + friends--I shall leave the letter in better hands for + finishing, I am so sleepy!! + + [Mr. Ramsay]--We have seen many things of which the ingenious + and very learned Dr. Woodward would say that they were "great + ornaments to our ponds and ditches." But of this enough, and + more than enough. Allow me to take this opportunity of + expressing my satisfaction at finding how completely Mrs. + E.B.R enters into the friendship which has so long existed + between _us_, and at seeing how fully prepared she is to + appreciate your kindness to myself and her; in short, to find + that she loves you all now, as if she had known you as long + as I have. May we never lose sight of these feelings! We saw + Oxford to-day--a good thing, but in detail not equal to + Cambridge--in general effect far superior. Gloster pleased + me: the tower and cloisters surpassingly fine. People do not + roar enough about the steeple of St. Mary's, Oxford--it is + _the finest_ in England, superior I think to that of + Salisbury. Are you aware that there is a modern church at + Oxford in the pure Norman style? My visit to Frome has given + me (except in parting) unmixed satisfaction. I cannot say how + much I have been gratified, and with what pleasure I look + forward to a renewal. I must to bed, my eyes cannot discern + the place to write in, and I am sleepy. Adieu, dearest + friends, one and all at the Field of Frome, the Hill of + Styles, the cottage of Keyford, etc. I rejoice to think that + my good friend _Kay_ is safe. Good-night! Woburn looks + well--"a great ornament," etc. + + Marked by Mrs. Clerk--"Written on their way from F.F.--first + visit." + + Mr. RAMSAY to Miss BYARD, Fromefield, Frome, Somerset. + + Edinburgh, Dec. 17, 1831, + + My dearest Friend, They have told me that you are not well, + and neither time nor distance can take away the feeling of + regard and friendship with which I sympathise with all that + occurs to you. I confess myself that I was some time since + disposed to look on all things around me with an anxious + aspect; but I am beginning to see in _all events_ but a part + of that dispensation which is so gloriously distinguished as + the work of _love_, and I think that public calamity or + private sorrow, sickness, pain, weariness and weakness, _may_ + all be translated into the same language, and may be arranged + as synonyms of the same word. Yes! piety, goodness, the + favour and approbation of God, are all marked out by sorrow + and infirmity here. Why else did the blessed Jesus tabernacle + here below--a man of sorrows? and why else was he acquainted + with grief? It might make a Christian almost drink his cup of + sickness and pain with _greediness_ when he remembers that he + is tasting the same cup as that of which his Lord drank, and + he might hail with rapture the outstretched arm of death and + suffering as about to place on his head the diadem of eternal + glory. I am not to flatter you--you need it not, you ask it + not; but, my friend, you must feel and know that you have + been walking with God, walking _humbly_, doing good, neither + trusting to false presumptions nor to your own merits. Christ + has been _your_ master, to Him you have looked, and, blessed + be God! He will never, never forsake those who trust to + Him,--those who are good to others for his sake,--those who + seek redemption through Him. Where, O ye years that are past, + have you gone? You have carried to the throne of grace many + an act of contrition, many a devout prayer, many a good deed, + many an offering of faith, from the friend to whom I now + write. Bring back, ye moments that are to come and which + shall be granted to her in this world, rich consolations, + promises of pardon, assurances of favour, all spiritual + blessings! Dear Miss Byard, may all these be yours in full + abundance. May God the Father bless you, through the Eternal + Spirit, for Christ's sake! This is the sincere and earnest + prayer of your affectionate and faithful friend, E.B.R. + + In this I am joined by Isabella. + + Marked--"It arrived just after her death." + +In his journal Mr. Ramsay speaks of Bishop Sandford with a very grateful +recollection. To him he owed his preferment, and a "more agreeable +charge could not well be had." He characterises him as a man of elegant +mind and accurate scholarship, of deep piety and sincere faith. I think +it is with some regret that he adds, the "state of the Church is much +changed since his episcopate." + +His dear brother Marmaduke died in the summer of 1831, and the Dean, who +is no exaggerator of his feelings, remarks--"This is one of the sorrows +for which language is inadequate. Such a mind, such taste, abilities, +and accomplishments!" Edward Ramsay felt that nothing could make up for +the loss of his brother, but he had comfort in thinking how much his +brother's mind had been wakened to religious inquiries. His simple notes +in his journal are sometimes worth preserving. "July 6, 1833, was the +finest day I ever remember." He passed it in the Highlands with +Professor Forbes, Skenes, and other delightful friends. On the 28th he +left for the Duke of Sutherland's funeral; afterwards he repaired to +Leamington and Dr. Jephson, whose skill he soon found reason to admire. +On leaving Leamington he thanks God that he has gained in health, and +learnt also wisdom in regard to the "management of myself, and certainly +in diet." It is not necessary to record the little tours with his wife, +which now happened almost every season, either to Deeside or the +Highlands or his old haunts in Somerset. On July 2, 1836, I find it +recorded that he went with a party to hear Dr. Chalmers at the Dean +Church, and returned all in great delight. He made a long journey that +year to hear the great organ at Birmingham, and came home by many +cathedrals, and yet "glad to get home." + +In 1838 he notes, after a Highland journey, the "Synod was this year for +altering the canons," He notes a "white-stone visit to the Stranges, +Ross-end Castle, with the Bells. Alas! how many things and people +are gone." + +In 1839 "Lady Dalhousie, my admired friend, came to stay with us. She +came January 19, and on the 22d died in the drawing-room in an instant! +It was an awful visitation, and never to be forgotten." + +The following letter, written immediately after the calamity, is from +the Marquis of Dalhousie, from various circumstances an object of great +affection to the Dean, who consented to take charge of his daughters +when he went as Governor-General to India, bestowing on them the care +and anxious watchfulness which the young ladies returned with hearty +affection:-- + + The MARQUIS OF DALHOUSIE to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Dalhousie Castle, 25th January 1839. + + My dear Mr. Ramsay--I have sent John in, partly because I am + anxious that you should let me know how Mrs. Ramsay is + to-day, and partly because I cannot rest till another evening + without endeavouring to express to you some portion of the + very, very deep gratitude which I feel for all your + kindness--for the kindness of your every act and word, and--I + am just as confident--of your every thought towards us all in + this sad time. _God knows how truly I feel it_: and with that + one expression I stop; for it makes me sick to think how slow + and how coldly words come to clothe the feeling which I wish + to convey to you. Believe only this, that to my own dying day + I never can forget your goodness. Believe this too--that + since it has pleased Almighty God that my poor mother's eyes + should not he closed under my roof, and by my hand, I would + not have wished any other place for her departure than among + friends so kindly, loving, and so well loved. + + God bless you and repay it to you, prays your ever grateful + and affectionate friend, DALHOUSIE. + + Rev. E. B. Ramsay. + +February 27, 1839.--"My uncle General Burnett died; another limb of the +older generation gone; a good and kind man; a man of the world, and not +a clever one. Latterly he showed a considerable desire to know more +about religion. Went with J. Sandilands to be present at the formation +of a branch of the Church Society at Glasgow--made a regular speech!" On +September 4th he writes--"The first day of meeting of the general +committee for business of the Scottish Episcopal Church Society. I gave +a large dinner. Much have I worked for this society, and done better +things than give dinners. By the by William Ramsay [his brother the +admiral] made a capital speech." On March 5, 1841, it is noted, Bishop +Walker died--"a good man. His mind cast in a limited mould of strong +prejudices; but a fair man, strictly honest in all his ways. He was not +fitted to unravel difficulties in his episcopate, and scarcely suited to +these times. He had been a furious opponent of the old evangelicals. A +constant and kind friend to me. May his memory be honoured. Bishop +Terrot elected bishop. I am very grateful to think that in all this +business I can look with satisfaction upon everything that has been +done by me." + +From this time Mr. Ramsay's thoughts were very much taken up with the +Episcopal Church Society, and he records in his journal most of its +meetings, and the English friends who came across the Borders to help +them. He mentions also a Scotch Presbyterian churchman who became +convinced of the apostolical authority of episcopacy--"an excellent +man." Then a visit of Mr. ----, "an accomplished and able man, somewhat +strong of the popish leaven." That was in 1842, and on the margin is +written--"Gone over to the Church of Rome, 1845." He mentions also the +"stupid business at Portobello and squabbles," and his going down to +make peace. On September 4th we have some things which seemed important +at their time--the Queen's visit to Scotland. He says, "It was a +stirring subject for old Scotland." "This day, 4th Sept., I read prayers +and preached before her Majesty, and also dined and sat near Prince +Albert and the Queen. In the evening presented to the Queen and Prince +Albert, and introduced to Sir Robert Peel." Then comes the cry--"All +vanity of vanities!" At the end of this month the Bishop of +London--"very agreeable"--was in Edinburgh, and the Dean accompanied him +to Glenalmond, to see the proposed site for Trinity College. In 1843 he +mentions the death of a friend, who, he feared, died an infidel: +"However, I have no wish to proclaim his errors. To me he was ever kind +and considerate. Let us leave judgment to Him who cannot err." In June +of that year he paid a visit to England, spent Sunday at Leeds, and was +much interested with Dr. Hook and his church. "I have considerable +dubitation as to the expediency of making the services of our parish +churches choral." He went on to London and Oxford, where it was long +vacation, but he met with great kindness from the heads of University +College and Exeter. "Magdalene is faultless." + +After mentioning some visitors in March 1844, he writes--"Dickens's +Christmas Carol really a treat, a thoroughly wholesome book." On the 8th +April he was present at the lunch given to the children of the Episcopal +poor in the Old Town. "This, I trust, is the commencement of a scheme to +bring some actually poor into our church. I made a speech, and, to my +astonishment, rather a good one." After a pretty long tour in the south +of England he comes home in August 1844, and notes a letter from the +Bishop of London, containing the offer of the Bishopric of New +Brunswick, in a handsome and gratifying manner. "I think I was right to +refuse. May God forgive me if it was an improper shrinking from duty." +October 14, 1844: "I have now brought up this record of my life's +transactions to the present time, and my purpose is, in future +journalising, to take the leading points, to notice subjects only, +painful, joyful, or difficult. All my thoughts since the offer of the +New Brunswick mitre have confirmed the correctness of my judgment." +October 17, 1844: "I am trying to repeat the experiment of last week, +and write my sermon over again. I see clearly that in such work we +cannot take too much pains: dinner at Lord Medwyn's to-day--very +pleasant--rather an exception this to dinners: how dull the routine! +October 22: succeeded in my resolution of rewriting the whole of my +sermon, and found the advantage; in fact, nothing in the way of public +speaking can be done without a thorough preparation. How high parties +are running! It has a sad effect on my mind; but my refuge must be in +keeping off controversy and adhering to edifying and practical +subjects." In the same month he records the death of a dear friend, whom +he visited on his deathbed. "Nothing," he says, "could be more +satisfactory than his state of mind;" the Dean lost a kind Christian, +attached and delightful friend. "I was glad to be able to answer his +scruples and fears about being an object of Christ's mercy and pardon." +December 11, 1844, he lost his mother--"simple-minded," he says, "as a +child. Oh! what a break of the family circle! It seems as if the last +link which bound us together were broken, and a point vanished round +which we could always rally. I went with Lauderdale to see the poor +remains, so attenuated, and yet the countenance like itself, still +beautiful, and fine features." The funeral made the Dean very sad. She +was followed to the grave by two sons, a son-in-law, two grandsons and +distant cousins. Mr. Alison read the service, and she was buried beside +her old friend of fifty years--poor Mrs. Macdonald. + +1844: "Christmas day morning, Communion 78, in all 404; the church so +full. I preached an old but a good sermon." He has a Christmas dinner of +a few friends, but not much Christmas spirit, he says. In 1845, January +12, the journal notices--"I preached my liturgy sermon, and apparently +with much success." Some of his congregation had spoken of it as worthy +to be printed. He saw a good deal of company in his own house, whom I do +not think it necessary to particularise, though they were generally of +distinction for talent or rank, or both together. He heard C. Kemble +read Henry VIII., which "I did much enjoy. Will. Shakspeare when most +known is most admired." On 19th January he preached a sermon, but his +note upon it is not like the last. "I liked it, but it did not seem to +take as I had expected. Have been much meditating this week on many +matters, Church especially: find myself unsettled, I fear, but I think I +have the remedy, which is to keep my attention fixed rather on practical +than on speculative points. We cannot agree on the one; on the other we +may, and good men do." March 2, 1845: "I confess that the Romanising +tendencies so openly avowed in the Church of England alarm me. The +question occurs, Is not this a necessary, or at least a natural tendency +of High Churchism?" Speaking of meetings of his Synod, he says "it is +wretched work, which ended, indeed, in doing nothing." One member had +spoken with much bitterness, which he says, "thank God, I do not feel." +3d April 1845: "We are in a nice mess about this Old Town business. Two +different communion offices in one day in the same chapel. Is it +possible that this could ever have been contemplated by the canon? I do +fear the extreme and Romanising party, and they hurt us here. The Scotch +office is supposed to identify us with them, and certainly the comments +upon it make it speak a language very different from the English." + +June 19.--"Left home in the 'Engineer' coach at seven, travelled through +to London without stop, and arrived there at one o'clock: wonderful the +shortening of this journey; went with a party to Handel's Athalia at +Exeter Hall; tired, fagged, and sleepy as I was, I yet felt deeply the +power of the mighty master in this his mighty work. Yes, Handel is the +greatest musician the world ever saw." + +July 18, 1845.--"Returned to London: did little more there: arrived in +Edinburgh for Mr. Sandiland's marriage, a great stretch of friendship in +me, for it has discomposed all our summer plans." On 15th August there +is an entry too characteristic to be omitted:--"Have been thinking a +great deal about the state of matters at present, and the sort of +demeanour I should exhibit to the world. I should be very +cautious--hardly give an opinion if conflicting statements, and +certainly not gossip about them--certainly not speak harshly or severely +of any. Keep my own course, work hard, and endeavour to conciliate; +rather lean to high than low side." November 10, 1845: "at a meeting to +hear Dr. Simpson, Mr. Macfarlane, and Norman Macleod give an account of +their mission to North America: interesting. Macleod a real +clever fellow." + +26th November 1845.--"The consecration of Dalkeith Chapel: we went out +and stayed the day; all good and well managed: Sermon preached by Rev. +E. B. R: approved: three bishops, twenty clergy. It is really a fine +thing for a man to have done; a beautiful chapel; hope it won't +be extreme." + +Dec. 2.--"Warden to College appointed; looks like business!" + +Dec. 7.--"Heard astonishing news--William appointed to the 'Terrible, +the largest steam man-of-war in the service--in the world." + +Dec. 14, 1845.--"Sermon on Christ the True Light. Collection for +Scottish Episcopal Church Society, L151." + +15th March 1846.--"Sermon, 'Am I your enemy because I tell you the +truth?' Here a sad blank, for I have been very ill, and out of chapel +two Sundays, and could not go to confirmation, and all sorts of horrors. +I have communed a good deal with myself, and I have made up my mind to a +conduct and demeanour in Church matters almost neutral. I positively +will not again mix myself up in any way with party, or even take part. I +will confine myself to St. John's and its duties. This is my +_line_--hear what every one has to say, and keep a quiet, conciliatory, +and even tenor. It is more striking the more I think of the different +way in which different minds are affected by religious truth." ... + +April 16.--"Synod meeting and Society. I took the moderate and +conciliatory side. Did right this time." + +April 29.--"Preached the Casuistry sermon. Mrs. R. made it A 20." + +June 1.--"Busy preparing for journey;" he leaves home for his summer +holiday "with rather less spirit and expectation of enjoyment +than usual." + +Mr. Ramsay was appointed Dean of the Diocese of Edinburgh by Bishop +Terrot in 1846, after having previously declined, as we saw, the dignity +of the Bishopric of New Brunswick, offered him by Sir Robert Peel. He +afterwards refused the Bishopric of Glasgow in 1847, and the +Coadjutor-Bishopric of Edinburgh in 1862. + +And now is the beginning of constantly recurring complaints of +depression--low spirits, a "cloud upon my spirits; headache, even pain +and violent pain." He was disappointed at not getting to see the +"Terrible;" was low and depressed. "Went to Bath. Delighted with +Torquay; interested at Exeter; the service there the very best. Is +cathedral service more than a solemn concert?" Then he went by +Beaminster to see his nephew Alexander and his family. He stayed a short +time at Crewkerne with his niece Mrs. Sparks. "Church a fine one: To +Frome: This visit full of interest. How kind and good! The only drawback +is parting. We spent a week at Frome, and did enjoy it much. Much +kindness, heartiness I should say, intelligence, and real goodness. +Changes I found, and saw how time had told on many a face and frame. My +dear companion was much pleased and interested in our visit.... July +16.--Left Frome, and sorrowed at parting. Saw Sydney Herbert's gorgeous +church at Wilton. Too much! With the exterior of Salisbury not at all +disappointed; with the interior a little. Arrived at Farnborough by +eight o'clock, and a most cordial welcome we had from all the inmates of +its pretty rectory. Went back to London on Friday, and returned to +Farnborough Saturday, and spent Sunday. July 19.--Was glad for Isabella +to have an opportunity of seeing a Sunday in a country place in England. +I preached twice, and we were interested. Aug. 4.--Came to York. +Glorious! Chapter-house restored by Mr. Bell." + +January 1, 1851.--"Having preached on Sunday last regarding improvement +and good resolutions, I would now do the same for myself. I have made +some resolutions in my own mind, chiefly regarding the control and +regulation of temper, irritability, forbearance, more composed and calm +temperament, order, diligence, dispatch of work, etc." On January 6th +there is a Ragged School meeting--"a long and tiresome meeting; the Duke +of A---- speaks well; Guthrie amusing; Fox Maule good; Candlish +clever--very." + +On his birthday in 1853 he writes: "I have just made two +resolves--first, never to give way to temper, fret, ill-humour, party +spirit, or prejudice; second, to work my best in what I may have +still to do." + +There is a great deal more of the journal, but one or two additional +extracts will show sufficiently the nature of the man, his devotion to +his sacred duty, his gentleness, and love of peace. The High Churchman +may think him unduly careless about forms and ceremonies; but, loving +him very well, I yet wish to represent the Dean as he really was. Above +all things full of charity, loving religion as he understood the +religion of the Gospel, and not much concerned, not really deeply +concerned, about the shape and dress in which it presented itself. He +held, however, that the Protestant Episcopal Church, as established in +England, as disestablished in Scotland, for he never would separate +them, was in all its belongings the most desirable, its service the +most decent. + +1858 was a sad year for the Dean. Mrs. Ramsay had been very ill, and +sinking in strength and spirit visibly, till, on the 23d July the +afflicted husband makes this entry:--"It pleased God to visit me with +the deep and terrible affliction of taking away my friend, companion, +and adviser of twenty-nine years." It was a heavy blow, and for a time +it seemed to paralyse the Dean. This journal, never regular, becomes +from this time quite broken. + +Looking back from this point, which to the Dean seemed the end of +happiness, he could acknowledge how duty supplied the place of pleasure. +He was grateful also for many mercies. In one respect he was singularly +fortunate. His Bishop and he, I may say during all the time he served in +St. John's, were cordially of the same way of thinking. Bishop Terrot +was indeed a very different man from himself, but in the relations of +Bishop and Dean they were very happy. The Dean wrote a little memoir of +Bishop Terrot, which he published in the _Scottish Guardian_ (May 15, +1872), where he prints the remarkable letter from the Bishop to himself, +answering the question why he declined communion with Mr. Drummond, and +ending with the sentence--"These are matters of _ecclesiastical police_ +which each local church has a right to manage in its own way, subject to +the law of the Catholic Church, i.e. the Bible." The Dean then bore +testimony that he had always found his Bishop an interesting companion, +a kind friend, a faithful and judicious adviser, and he speaks highly, +and surely not too highly, of his great intellectual powers, as well as +of his moral qualities. I am myself a very hearty admirer of Bishop +Terrot, and I think it not out of place to add something to our +knowledge of him, by printing a few letters which concern him and +his family. + + COLONEL TERROT to DEAN RAMSAY.--Without date, but of the + year 1872. + + Very Rev. and dear Sir--There is one little incorrect + deduction in your kind memoir, or at least a deduction which + may be made from what you say of my father deriving his + intellect from his mother---that my grandfather was inferior + in such respects. From deep feeling and devotion to his + memory, my grandmother never spoke of her husband to us, but + from others I have heard that he was a bright, handsome and + talented young man, who, with the very imperfect education + given at that time to officers in the army, and employed in + active service in America at the age of fourteen, was yet + distinguished for ability, especially in mathematics and + engineering matters, so that he was employed by those in + command of the siege, and was actually riding with the + engineer who was in charge of the sieging operations when a + cannon-ball struck and killed him. He was in an English + infantry regiment, and not in the Indian service, except that + the regiment was serving in India at the time. He met my + grandmother in the ship which took them to India. She was + going to a maternal uncle, Colonel Hughes, who was + considerably displeased on her announcing at Madras that she + was engaged to a poor young officer who had offered to her + during the voyage. But the young couple being determined, he + gave his consent, and continued kind to his niece, and my + father was born in his house, and at his father's request + called Hughes after him. My grandfather was twenty-five and + his bride eighteen at their marriage, and she was a widow + before she was twenty, from which time till she died at + eighty-five she was a widow indeed, making her son the chief + object of her life, living in and for him. + + His uncle William, whom he succeeded at Haddington, was never + married, and was exceedingly attached to my father. He was a + singular man; in his early days very gay and handsome, and + living in some matters, I know not what, so incorrectly, that + on offering himself for holy orders, the then Bishop of + Durham wrote to him mentioning something he had heard, and + telling him if it was true he was not fitly prepared for + taking orders. My uncle acknowledged the accusation as far as + it was true, and thanked the Bishop for his letter, and + abstained from coming forward at that time, but took the + admonition so to heart that it led to an entire conversion of + heart and life. He then came forward in a very different + state to receive ordination, and was through his whole life a + most zealous and devoted man, a friend of Milner and + Wilberforce. An old lady, Mrs. Logan of Seafield, told me + that once when Mrs. Siddons was acting, uncle William walked + twenty miles to see her and persuade her not to go, and, + whether by arguments or eloquence, he succeeded. Though kind + and gentle he was a strong Calvinist, and by his zeal and + energy in preaching such doctrines, injured himself in a + worldly point of view. He was always poor, and often gave + away all the little he had, and lived from hand to mouth. He + was very much admired and beloved by ladies, which perhaps + prevented his marrying. He was very happy and useful among + the sailors, and died at his sister's, Mrs. Jackson, at + Woolwich. She, as Elizabeth Terrot, had been a beauty, and + was to the last a fine, happy, spirited, contented and joking + old lady, very fond of my father, to whom she left all she + had. She was bright, unselfish and amusing, even on her + deathbed incapable of despondency or gloom. + + Excuse my troubling you with these details; and believe me to + be truly grateful for your graceful tribute to our dear + father. I send a few lines for your private eye, written by + my sister Mary, expressing what she felt on last seeing him, + and it expresses, too, exactly what I felt that last Good + Friday as he sat in that chair in which he had so long + suffered. I never saw him there again, With deep respect, + gratefully yours, S.A. TERROT. + +LINES by MISS MARY TERROT, now MRS. MALCOLM. + + +I. + +Sad, silent, broken down, longing for rest, +His noble head bent meekly on his breast, +Bent to the bitter storm that o'er it swept; + I looked my last, and surely, then I thought, + Surely the conflict's o'er, the battle's fought; +To see him thus, the Saviour might have wept. + +II. + +His rest was near--his everlasting rest; +No more I saw him weary and oppressed. +_There_ in the majesty of death he lay + For ever comforted: I could not weep; + He slept, dear father! his last blessed sleep, +Bright in the dawn of the eternal day. + +III. + +And thou, whose hand _his_, groping, sought at last, +The faithful hand that he might hold it fast! +Once more, when parting on the eternal shore, + It may be, when thy heart and hand shall fail, + Entering the shadows of death's awful vale +His hand shall grasp thine, groping then no more. + + DEAN STANLEY to DEAN RAMSAY. + + My dear Dean--Many thanks for your very interesting memoir of + Bishop Terrot. His remark about _humdrum_ and _humbug_ is + worthy of the best days of Sydney Smith, and so is a hit + about table-turning[10]. I once heard him preach, and still + remember with pleasure the unexpected delight it gave to my + dear mother and myself. We did not know in the least what was + coming, either from the man or the text, and it was + excellent.--Yours sincerely, + + A.P. STANLEY. + + Deanery, Westminster, 1872. + + Right Hon. W.E. GLADSTONE to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Hawarden, May 26, 1872 + + My dear Friend--I have read with much interest your graceful + and kindly memoir of Bishop Terrot, which you were so good as + to send me. + + He had always appeared to me as a very real and notable, and + therefore interesting man, though for some reason not + apparent a man _manque_, a man who ought to have been more + notable than he was. I quite understand and follow you in + placing him with, or rather in the class of, Whately and + Paley, but he fell short of the robust activity of the first, + and of that wonderful clearness of the other, which is actual + brightness. + + Your account of the question of Lordship is to me new and + interesting. I have never called the Scottish Bishops by that + title. I should be content to follow the stream, but then we + must deal equally, and there is the case of the Anglo-Roman + bishop to meet, especially now that the Ecclesiastical Titles + Bill has been repealed; but only on Friday I addressed one of + the very best among them "Right Rev. Bishop M----." + + You will, I am sure, allow me the license of private judgment + in the two expositions about the church in p. 5. You praise + both, but the second the more highly. To me the first seems + excellent, and the second, strange to say, wanting in his + usual clearness and consecutiveness. For having in head (1) + most truly said that Christ "instituted a society _and_ + revealed a doctrine," he then proceeds as if he had quite + forgotten the first half of the proposition, and conceived of + the society only as (so to speak) embedded in the doctrine. + Also, I complain of his depriving you of the character of + [Greek: iegeus], which indeed I am rather inclined to claim + for myself, as "He hath made us kings and priests" ([Greek: + hiegeis]). + + I hope you are gradually maturing the idea of your promised + summer expedition to the south, and that before long I shall + hear from you on the subject of it. + + Will you remember me kindly to Miss Cochrane, and believe me, + ever affectionately yours, + + W.E. GLADSTONE. + +The Dean was greatly affected by a terrible calamity, which happened in +his house in Ainslie Place, where, in June of 1866, his niece Lucy +Cochrane, one of his family, was burnt to death; out of many letters of +condolence which he received at the time, I have only space to insert +three--one from the Rev. Dr. Hannah, then head of Glenalmond College, an +accomplished scholar, to whom our Dean was much attached, and upon whom +he drew very freely in any questions of more recondite scholarship, +another from the Rev. D.T.K. Drummond, and the third from the Premier:-- + + Rev. Dr. J. HANNAH to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Trinity College, Glenalmond, N.B. + + June 15, 1866. + + Dear Mr. Dean--I _must_ write one line, though I know you + will be overwhelmed with letters, to say how deeply + distressed and shocked we are at the news in this morning's + paper, and how profoundly we sympathize with you under this + fearful affliction. I thought instantly of Mr. Keble's lovely + poem in the Lyra Innocentium:-- + +"Sweet maiden, for so calm a life, +Too bitter seemed thine end." + + And it applies closely, I am sure, in the consolations it + suggests; that + +"He who willed her tender frame +Should rear the martyr's robe of flame," + + has prepared for her a garland in Heaven, + +"Tinged faintly with such golden light +As crowns His martyr train." + + But if blessed for her, it will be a sore trial for the + survivors. We feel so keenly for her poor sisters, who seem + to have to bear the brunt of so many sorrows. May God support + them and you! So prays in hearty sympathy, yours ever + sincerely, + + J. HANNAH. + + Rev. D.T.K. DRUMMOND to DEAN RAMSAY. + + St. Fillans, Crieff, 16th June. + + My dear Friend--This morning's paper brought us the sad, sad + intelligence of the frightful calamity which has befallen + your household. + + My heart aches when I think of the overwhelming sorrow this + great affliction must bring to your kind and loving heart. + Long friendship and unbroken esteem must be my apology for + intruding on you at this early stage of your bereavement. I + cannot but express my deep and heart-felt sympathy with you + in it, and my earnest prayer that God the Holy Spirit may + sanctify and comfort by his own grace and presence all on + whom this great sorrow has fallen. + + In the expression of this sympathy my dear wife cordially + unites with yours most affectionately and truly, + + D.T.K. DRUMMOND. + + Right Hon. W.E. GLADSTONE to DEAN RAMSAY. + + 11 Carlton H. Terrace, + + June 16, 1866. + + My dear Dean Ramsay--I cannot refrain from writing to you a + word of sympathy under the grievous calamity with which your + peaceful and united household has in the providence of God + been visited. I have only heard of it in a very partial + account to-day; but I deeply lament alike the extinction of a + young and promising life, the loss your affectionate heart + has sustained, and the circumstances of horror with which it + has been accompanied. I need not say how this concern extends + to your brother the Admiral also. I shall hope to hear of you + through some common friend. I cannot ask you to write, but + beg you to believe me always affectionately yours, + + W.E. GLADSTONE. + +Very few of the Dean's own letters have been preserved, but the +following will show him as a correspondent:-- + + DEAN RAMSAY to Dr. ALEXANDER. + + 23 Ainslie Place, Feb. 3, 1865 + + Dear Dr. Lindsay Alexander--I am not aware of having an + undue predominance of modesty in my nature, but really I have + been surprised, I may truly say much amazed, at the + dedication of the volume which I received this evening. Need + I add that, on more calmly considering the matter, I am + deeply gratified. From Dr. Lindsay Alexander such a + compliment can be no ordinary gratification. "Laudari a + laudatis" has always been a distinction coveted by those who + value the opinion of the wise and good. + + I thank you most cordially for the delicacy with which you + refer to the "most stedfast adherence to conviction" of one + who has long been convinced that no differences in matter of + polity or forms of worship ought to violate that "unity of + spirit," or sever that "bond of peace," in which we should + ever seek to join all those whom we believe sincerely to hold + the truth as it is in Jesus.--I am always, with sincere + regard, yours truly and obliged, + + E.B. RAMSAY. + + DEAN RAMSAY to Mrs. CLERK, Kingston Deverell. + + 23 Ainslie Place, + + Edinburgh, March 14, 1865. + + Dearest Stuart--I take great blame and sorrow to myself for + having left your kind letter to me on my birthday so long + unanswered. It was indeed a charming letter, and how it took + me back to the days of "Auld lang Syne!" They were happy + days, and good days, and the savour of them is pleasant. Do + you know (you don't know) next Christmas day is forty-two + years since I left Frome, and forty-nine years since I went + to Frome? Well! they were enjoyable days, and rational days, + and kind-hearted days. What jokes we used to have! O dear! + How many are gone whom we loved and honoured! I often think + of my appearing at Frome, falling like a stranger from the + clouds, and finding myself taken to all your hearts, and made + like one of yourselves. Do you know Mrs. Watkins is alive and + clever, and that I constantly correspond with her? You + recollect little Mary Watkins at Berkely. She is now a + grandmother and has three or four grandchildren!--ay, time + passes on. It does. I have had a favoured course in Scotland; + I have been thirty-seven years in St. John's, and met only + with kindness and respect. I have done much for my church, + and that is acknowledged by every one. My Catechism is in a + tenth edition--my Scottish Book in an eleventh; 3000 copies + were sold the first week of the cheap or people's edition. I + meet with much attention from all denominations. A very able + man here, Dr. Lindsay Alexander, an Indpendent, has just + dedicated a book (a good one) to Dean Ramsay, with a + flattering dedication. But I don't expect to hold on _much_ + longer. I feel changed, and at times not equal to much + exertion. It was a terrible change for me to lose my + companion of twenty-nine years, and I have never, of course, + recovered that loss. It is a great point for a person like me + to have three nieces, quite devoted to care of me and to make + me happy: cheerful, animated, and intelligent, pretty + also--one of them an excellent musician, and _organist_ to + our amateur choir for week days in the chapel. By the by we + have a glorious organ. How I have gone on about my miserable + self--quite egotistical. "If I may be allowed the language" + (the late Capt. Balne). But I thought you would like it. + Good-bye. Love to Malcolm _Kenmore_. When do your boys come? + Your ever loving and affectionate old friend, + + E.B. RAMSAY. + + DEAN RAMSAY to Mrs. CLERK. + + 23 Ainslie Place, + + Edinburgh, 12th Feb. 1868. + + Many thanks for writing about our beloved Bessie, my very + dear Stuart. She is indeed much endeared to all the friends, + and I am a friend of more than 50 years! God's will be done. + We have come to that age when we must know our time is + becoming very uncertain. + + There is only one thing, dearest Stuart, that I _can_ + say--my best wishes, best affections, best prayers, are with + her who now lies on a sick bed. _She_ has not to begin the + inquiry into the love and support of a gracious Redeemer. She + may say, "I know that my Redeemer liveth." + + May God be merciful and gracious to support you all on this + deeply interesting occasion, is the earnest prayer of your + affectionate old friend, E. B. RAMSAY. + + DEAN RAMSAY to Mrs. CLEKK. + + 23 Ainslie Place, + + Edinburgh, 3d June 1870. + + My dear Stuart--I had such a kind letter from you some time + ago, about visiting you, and I did not answer it--wrong, + very! and I am sorry I put it off. Should I come to England + this summer I should look on it as a _last_ visit, and would + make an effort to see old Frome again. Do you know it is + fifty-four years since I first appeared at Rodden! + + I preach still, and my voice and articulation don't fail; but + otherwise I am changed, and walk I cannot at all. St. John's + goes on as usual--nice people, many, and all are very kind. + We have lately had the interior renewed, and some changes in + the arrangement, which are great improvement. It is much + admired, "a great ornament to our ponds and ditches,"--Dr. + Woodward. However, dear Stuart, I have not yet said + distinctly enough what I meant to say at the beginning--that + should I come south I would make an effort to come to + K. Deverell. + + Miss Walker has left fully L200,000 to our church. I am at + present (as Dean) the only Episcopal trustee, with four + official trustees--all Presbyterians. + + The Bishops seem the most _go-ahead_ people in the church + just now. New sectioning and revision of Scripture, + translation, all come from them: both of much importance. I + wish they could get rid of the so-called Athanasian Creed. I + cannot bear it. Nothing on earth could ever induce me to + repeat the first part and the last part. Love to yourself, + husband, and all yours.--Your affectionate + + E.B. RAMSAY. + + DEAN STANLEY to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Broomhall, Dunfermline, + + 7th August 1870. + + My dear and venerable Brother Dean--It was very ungrateful of + me not to have thanked you before for your most kind + vindication of my act in Westminster Abbey. I had read your + letter with the greatest pleasure, and must now thank you for + letting me have a separate copy of it. I certainly have no + reason to be dissatisfied with my defenders. All the bishops + who have spoken on the subject (with the single exception of + the Bishop of Winchester) have approved the step--so I + believe have a vast majority of English churchmen. + + How any one could expect that I should make a distinction + between confirmed and unconfirmed communicants, which would + render any administration in the abbey impossible, or that I + should distinguish between the different shades of orthodoxy + in the different nonconformist communions, I cannot conceive. + I am sure that I acted as a good churchman. I humbly hope + that I acted as He who first instituted the Sacrament of the + Lord's Supper would have wished. + + You are very kind to have taken so much interest in my + essays, and what you say of the Athanasian Creed is deeply + instructive. You will be glad to hear--what will become + public in a few days--that of the 29 Royal Commissioners, 18 + at least--including the Archbishop of Canterbury and the + Bishops of St. David's and Carlisle and the two Regius + Professors of Divinity--have declared themselves against + continuing the use of it. + + I found your note here when we arrived last night to assist + at the coming of age of young Lord Elgin. We were obliged to + pass rapidly through Edinburgh, in order to reach this by + nightfall. In case I am able to come over this week to + Edinburgh, should I find you at home, and at what hour? + + It would probably be on Thursday that I could most easily + come.--Yours sincerely, + + A.P. STANLEY. + + DEAN RAMSAY to Rev. MALCOLM CLERK, + + Kingston Deverell, Warminster, Wilts. + + 23 Ainslie Place, Edin., Sept. 5 [1872]. + + My dear Malcolm Clerk--Many thanks for your remarks touching + the Athanasian Creed. I agree quite, and am satisfied we gain + nothing by retaining it, and lose much. You ask if I could + help to get facsimiles; I am not likely--not in my line I + fear. Should anything turn up I will look after it. One of + the propositions to which unlimited faith must be given, is + drawn from an analogy, which expresses the most obscure of + all questions in physics--i.e. the union of mind and matter, + the what constitutes one mortal being--all very well to use + in explanation or illustration, but as a positive article of + faith in itself, monstrous. Then the Filioque to be insisted + on as eternal death to deny! + + People hold such views. A writer in the _Guardian_ (Mr. + Poyntz) maintains that God looks with more favour upon a man + living in SIN than upon one who has seceded ever so small + from orthodoxy. Something must be done, were it only to stop + the perpetual, as we call it in Scottish phrase, + _blethering_! + + I am always glad to hear of your boys. My love to Stuart, and + same to thyself.--Thine affectionate fourscore old friend, + + E.B. RAMSAY. + +I am preparing a twenty-second edition of _Reminiscences_. Who would +have thought it? No man. + +I have not hitherto made any mention of the Dean's most popular book, +the _Reminiscences_. I cannot write but with respect of a work in which +he was very much interested, and where he showed his knowledge of his +countrymen so well. As a critic, I must say that his style is peculiarly +unepigrammatic; and yet what collector of epigrams or epigrammatic +stories has ever done what the Dean has done for Scotland? It seems as +if the wilful excluding of point was acceptable, otherwise how to +explain the popularity of that book? All over the world, wherever Scotch +men and Scotch language have made their way--and that embraces wide +regions--the stories of the _Reminiscences_, and Dean Ramsay's name as +its author, are known and loved as much as the most popular author of +this generation. In accounting for the marvellous success of the little +book, it should not be forgotten that the anecdotes are not only true to +nature, but actually true, and that the author loved enthusiastically +Scotland, and everything Scotch. But while there were so many things to +endear it to the peasantry of Scotland, it was not admired by them +alone. I insert a few letters to show what impression it made on those +whom one would expect to find critical, if not jealous. Dickens, the +king of story-tellers; Dr. Guthrie, the most picturesque of preachers; +Bishop Wordsworth, Dean Stanley, themselves masters of style--how +eagerly they received the simple stories of Scotland told +without ornament. + + BISHOP WORDSWORTH to DEAN RAMSAY. + + The Feu House, Perth, January 12, 1872. + + My dear Dean--Your kind, welcome and most elegant present + reached me yesterday--in bed; to which, and to my sofa, I + have been confined for some days by a severe attack of brow + ague; and being thus disabled for more serious employment, I + allowed my thoughts to run upon the lines which you will find + over leaf. Please to accept them as being _well intended_; + though (like many other good intentions) I am afraid they + give only too true evidence of the source from which they + come--viz., _disordered head._--Yours very sincerely, + + C. WORDSWORTH, + + _Bp. of St. Andrews_. + +Ad virum venerabilem, optimum, dilectissimum, EDVARDUM +B. RAMSAY, S.T.P., Edinburgi Decanum, accepto +ejus libro cui titulus _Reminiscences_, etc.; vicesimum +jam lautiusque et amplius edito. + +Editio accessit vicesima! plaudite quiequid + Scotia festivi fert lepidique ferax! +Non vixit frustra qui frontem utcunque severam, + Noverit innocuis explicuisse jocis: +Non frustra vixit qui tot monumenta priorum + Salsa pia vetuit sedulitate mori: +Non frustra vixit qui quali nos sit amore + Vivendum, exemplo praecipiensque docet: +Nec merces te indigna manet: juvenesque senesque + Gaudebunt nomen concelebrare tuum; +Condiet appositum dum fercula nostra salinum, + Praebebitque suas mensa secunda nuces; +Dum stantis rhedae aurigam tua pagina fallet, + Contentum in sella taedia longa pati! +Quid, quod et ipsa sibi devinctum Scotia nutrix + Te perget gremio grata fovere senem; +Officiumque pium simili pietate rependens, + Saecula nulla sinet non[11] meminisse Tui. + +The TRANSLATION is from the pen of DEAN STANLEY:-- + +Hail, Twentieth Edition! From Orkney to Tweed, + Let the wits of all Scotland come running to read. +Not in vain hath he lived, who by innocent mirth + Hath lightened the frowns and the furrows of earth: +Not in vain hath he _lived_, who will never let _die_ + The humours of good times for ever gone by: +Not in vain hath he _lived_, who hath laboured to give + In himself the best proof how by love we may _live_. +Rejoice, our dear Dean, thy reward to behold + In united rejoicing of young and of old; +Remembered, so long as our boards shall not lack + A bright grain of salt or a hard nut to crack; +So long as the cabman aloft on his seat, + Broods deep o'er thy page as he waits in the street! +Yea, Scotland herself, with affectionate care, + Shall nurse an old age so beloved and so rare; +And still gratefully seek in her heart to enshrine + One more _Reminiscence_, and that shall be Thine. + + From the DEAN of WESTMINSTER. + + The Deanery, Westminster, + + February 3, 1872. + + My dear elder (I cannot say eldest so long as the Dean of + Winchester lives) Brother--I am very glad that you are + pleased with my attempt to render into English the Bishop's + beautiful Latinity.... + + Accept our best wishes for many happy returns of the day just + past.--Yours sincerely, + + A.P. STANLEY. + +On the publication of the Twentieth Edition of the _Reminiscences_, +Professor Blackie addressed to the Dean the following sonnets:-- + +I. + + Hail! wreathed in smiles, thou genial book! and hail + Who wove thy web of bright and various hue, + The wise old man, who gleaned the social tale + And thoughtful jest and roguish whim, that grew + Freely on Scotland's soil when Scotland knew + To be herself, nor lusted to assume + Smooth English ways--that they might live and bloom + With freshness, ever old and ever new + In human hearts. Thrice happy he who knows + With sportive light the cloudy thought to clear, + And round his head the playful halo throws + That plucks the terror from the front severe: + Such grace was thine, and such thy gracious part, +Thou wise old Scottish man of large and loving heart. + +II. + + The twentieth edition! I have looked + Long for my second--but it not appears; + Yet not the less I joy that thou hast brooked + Rich fruit of fair fame, and of mellow years, + Thou wise old man, within whose saintly veins + No drop of gall infects life's genial tide, + Whose many-chambered human heart contains + No room for hatred and no home for pride. + Happy who give with stretch of equal love + This hand to Heaven and that to lowly earth, + Wise there to worship with great souls above + As here to sport with children in their mirth; + Who own one God with kindly-reverent eyes +In flowers that prink the earth, and stars that gem the skies. + +JOHN STUART BLACKIE. + + CHARLES DICKENS to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Gad's Hill Place, Higham, by Rochester, Kent, + + Tuesday, 29th May 1866. + + My dear Sir--I am but now in the receipt of your kind letter, + and its accompanying book. If I had returned home sooner, I + should sooner have thanked you for both. + + I cannot adequately express to you the gratification I have + derived from your assurance that I have given you pleasure. + In describing yourself as a stranger of whom I know nothing, + you do me wrong however. The book I am now proud to possess + as a mark of your goodwill and remembrance has for some time + been too well known to me to admit of the possibility of my + regarding its writer in any other light than as a friend in + the spirit; while the writer of the introductory page marked + viii. in the edition of last year[12] had commanded my + highest respect as a public benefactor and a brave soul. + + I thank you, my dear Sir, most cordially, and I shall always + prize the words you have inscribed in this delightful volume, + very, very highly.--Yours faithfully and obliged, + + CHARLES DICKENS. + + Dr. GUTHRIE to DEAN RAMSAY. + + 1 Salisbury Road, + + 30th October 1872. + + My dear Mr. Dean--My honoured and beloved friend, I have + received many sweet, tender, and Christian letters touching + my late serious illness, but among them all none I value + more, or almost so much, as your own. + + May the Lord bless you for the solace and happiness it gave + to me and mine! How perfect the harmony in our views as to + the petty distinctions around which--sad and shame to think + of it--such fierce controversies have raged! I thank God that + I, like yourself, have never attached much importance to + these externals, and have had the fortune to be regarded as + rather loose on such matters. We have just, by God's grace, + anticipated the views and aspects they present on a deathbed. + + I must tell you how you helped us to pass many a weary, + restless hour. After the Bible had been read to me in a low + monotone--when I was seeking sleep and could not find it--a + volume of my published sermons was tried, and sometimes very + successfully, as a soporific. I was familiar with them, and + yet they presented as much novelty as to divert my mind from + my troubles. And what if this failed? then came the + _Reminiscences_ to entertain me, and while away the long + hours when all hope of getting sleep's sweet oblivion + was given up! + + So your book was one of my many mercies. But oh, how great in + such a time the unspeakable mercy of a full, free, present + salvation! In Wesley's words + + "I the chief of sinners am, + But Jesus died for me." + + I have had a bit of a back-throw, but if you could come + between three and four on Friday, I would rejoice to see + you.--Ever yours, with the greatest esteem, + + THOMAS GUTHRIE. + + Miss STIRLING GRAHAM to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Duntrune, 8th January 1872. + + My dear Mr. Dean--I thank you very much for the gift of your + new edition of "Scottish Reminiscences," and most especially + for the last few pages on Christian union and liberality, + which I have read with delight. + + I beg also to thank you for the flattering and acceptable + _testimonial_ you have bestowed on myself.--Your most + respectful and grateful friend, + + CLEMENTINA STIRLING GRAHAM. + + Rev. Dr. HANNA to DEAN RAMSAY. + + 16 Magdala Crescent, 11th January 1872. + + Dear Dean Ramsay--I have been touched exceedingly by your + kindness in sending me a copy of the twentieth edition of the + _Reminiscences_. + + It was a happy thought of Mr. Douglas to present it to the + public in such a handsome form--the one in which it will take + its place in every good library in the country. + + I am especially delighted with the last twenty pages of this + edition. Very few had such a right to speak about the strange + commotion created by the act of the two English Bishops, and + the manner in which they tried to lay the storm, and still + fewer could have done it with such effect. + + One fruit of your work is sure to abide. As long as Scotland + lasts, _your_ name will "be associated with gentle and happy + _Reminiscences of Scottish Life and Character_." + + Mrs. Hanna joins me in affectionate regard.--With highest + respect and esteem, I ever am, yours very truly, + + WM. HANNA. + + DEAN RAMSAY to Rev. Dr. L. ALEXANDER. + + 23 Ainslie Place, Edinburgh. + + January 29, 1872. + + My clear Dr. Alexander--Since I had the pleasure of your most + agreeable visit, and its accompanying conversation, I have + been very unwell and hardly left the house. You mentioned the + reference made by Dean Stanley (?) to the story of the + semi-idiot boy and his receiving the communion with such + heart-felt reality. I forgot to mention that, summer before + last, two American gentlemen were announced, who talked very + pleasantly before I found who they were--one a Baptist + minister at Boston, and the other a professor in a college. I + did not know why they had called at all until the minister + _let on_ that he did not like to be in Edinburgh without + waiting upon the author of _Reminiscences_, as the book had + much interested him in Scottish life, language and character, + before he had been a visitor on the Scottish shores. "But + chiefly," he added, "I wished to tell you that the day before + I sailed I preached in a large store to above two thousand + people; that from your book I had to them brought forward the + anecdote of the simpleton lad's deep feeling in seeing the + '_pretty man_' in the communion, and of his being found dead + next morning." To which he added, in strong American tones, + "I pledge _myself_ to you, sir, there was not a dry eye in + the whole assembly." + + It is a feature of modern times how anecdotes, sayings, + expressions, etc., pass amongst the human race. I have + received from Sir Thomas Biddulph an expression of the + Queen's pleasure at finding pure _Scottish_ anecdotes have + been so popular in England. How fond she is of + Scotland!--With much esteem, I am very truly yours, + + E.B. RAMSAY. + +The Dean was an enthusiastic admirer of Dr. Chalmers, and on the evening +of March 4, 1849, he read a memoir of the life and labours of Chalmers +at a meeting of the Royal Society of Edinburgh. That memoir, although it +had been to a great extent anticipated by Rev. Dr. Hanna's fine and +copious memoir of his father-in-law, was printed in the Society +Transactions, and afterwards went through several editions when issued +in a separate volume. + + LORD MEDWTN to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Ainslie Place, Thursday morning + + My dear Mr. Ramsay--I beg to thank you most truly for your + very acceptable gift so kindly sent to me yesterday evening. + I had heard with the greatest satisfaction of the admirable + sketch you had read to the Royal Society of the public + character of the latest of our Scottish worthies--a very + remarkable man in many respects; one whose name must ever + stand in the foremost rank of Christian philanthropists; all + whose great and various talents and acquirements being + devoted with untiring energy to the one great object--the + temporal and eternal benefit of mankind. What I also greatly + admired about him was that all the great adulation he met + with never affected his simple-mindedness; his humility was + remarkable. There was the same absence of conceit or + assumption of any kind which also greatly distinguished his + great cotemporary, our friend Walter Scott; in truth, both + were too far elevated above other men to seek any + adventitious distinction. I wish our country could show more + men like Chalmers to hold up to imitation, or if too exalted + to be imitated, yet still to be proud of; and that they were + fortunate enough to have admirers such as you, capable of + recording their worth in an _eloge_, such as the public has + the satisfaction of receiving at your hands. Again I beg to + thank you for your kind remembrance of me on the present + occasion.--Believe me, my dear Sir, yours very truly, + + J.H. FORBES. + + Dr. CANDLISH to DEAN RAMSAY. + + 4 S. Charlotte Street, Tuesday, 6th March. + + My dear Sir--I cannot deny myself the pleasure of expressing + to you the deep interest and delight with which I listened to + your discourse last night, so worthy, in every view, of the + subject, the occasion, and the audience. And while I thank + you most sincerely for so cordial and genial a tribute to the + memory of the greatest of modern Scotsmen, I venture to + express my hope that we may be favoured with an earlier and + wider publication of it than the Transactions of the Royal + Society will afford.--Pray excuse this intrusion, and believe + me, yours very truly, + + ROB. S. CANDLISH. + + Dean Ramsay. + + I will indulge myself only with one phrase from the Dean's + memoir of Dr. Chalmers:--"Chalmers's greatest delight was to + contrive plans and schemes for raising degraded human nature + in the scale of moral living. The favourite object of his + contemplation was human nature attaining the highest + perfection of which it is capable, and especially as that + perfection was manifested in saintly individuals, in + characters of great acquirements, adorned with the graces of + Christian piety. His greatest sorrow was to contemplate + masses of mankind hopelessly bound to vice and misery by + chains of passion, ignorance, and prejudice. As no one more + firmly believed in the power of Christianity to regenerate a + fallen race, as faith and experience both conspired to assure + him that the only effectual deliverance for the sinful and + degraded was to be wrought by Christian education, and by the + active agency of Christian instruction penetrating into the + haunts of vice and the abodes of misery, these acquisitions + he strove to secure for all his beloved countrymen; for these + he laboured, and for these he was willing to spend and to + be spent." + + That high yet just character not only shows Dean Ramsay's + appreciation of Chalmers, but seems to show that he had + already set him up as the model which he himself was to + follow. At any rate, he attempted to stir up the public mind + to give some worthy testimonial to the greatest of modern + Scotsmen. A few letters connected with this subject I have + put together. I did not think it necessary to collect more, + since the object has been attained under difficulties of time + and distance which might have quelled a less enthusiastic + admirer. It is pleasant to notice the general consent with + which we agree that no one else was so fitted to recommend + the Chalmers memorial as Dean Ramsay. + + It was to do honour to my own little book that I ventured, + without asking leave, to print the few lines which follow, + from the great French writer, the high minister of State, the + patron of historical letters for half-a-century in France, + the Protestant Guizot. + + M. GUIZOT to the DEAN. + + Paris, ce 7 Fevrier 1870, + + 10 Rue Billault. + + Sir--Je m'associerai avec un vrai et serieux plaisir a + l'erection d'une statue en l'honneur du Dr. Chalmers. Il n'y + a point de theologien ni de moraliste Chretien a qui je porte + une plus haute estime. Sur quelques unes des grandes + questions qu' il a traitees, je ne partage pas ses opinions; + mais j'honore et j'admire l'elevation, la vigueur de sa + pense, et la beaute morale de son genie. Je vous prie, + Monsieur, de me compter parmi les hommes qui se feliciteront + de pouvoir lui rendre un solennel hommage, et je vous + remercie d'avoir pense a moi dans ce dessein. + + Recevez l'assurance de mes sentiments les plus distingues. + + GUIZOT. + + Mr. E.B. Ramsay, Dean, etc., 23 Ainslie Place, Edinburgh, + North Britain. + +Some of Mr. Gladstone's letters, already printed, show that they were +not the beginning of the correspondence between him and the Dean. The +accident which made them acquainted will be mentioned afterwards +(p. lxxxi.) + + Right Hon. W.E. GLADSTONE to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Hawarden Castle, Chester, + + Jan. 3, 1870. + + My dear Dean Ramsay--I send you my rather shabby contribution + of L10 to the Chalmers' Memorial. I wish it were more, but I + am rather specially pressed at this time; and I think I + refused Robert Bruce altogether not long ago. + + I quite understand the feeling of the Scotch aristocracy, + but I should have thought Lothian would be apart from, as + well as above it. + + But the number of subscriptions is the main thing, and very + many they ought to be if Scotland is Scotland still. He was + one of Nature's nobles. It is impossible even to dream that a + base or unworthy thought ever found harbour for a moment + in his mind. + + Is it not extraordinary to see this rain of Bishoprics upon + _my_ head? Nor (I think) is it over; the next twelvemonth + (wherever I may be at the end of it) will, I think, probably + produce three more. + + Bishop Temple is a fine fellow, and I hope all will now go + well. For Manchester (this is secret) I hope to have Mr. + Fraser of Clifton--a very notable man, in the first rank of + knowledge and experience on the question of education. Many + pressed him for Salisbury. + + I can truly say that every Bishop who has been appointed has + been chosen simply as the best man to be had. + + Ah! when will you spend that month here, which I shall never + cease to long for?--Ever affectionately yours, + + W.E. GLADSTONE. + + Rev. Dr. CANDLISH to DEAN RAMSAY. + + 52 Melville Street, 7th Dec. 1870. + + Dear Dean Ramsay--I should have acknowledged yours of the 1st + sooner. I cannot say that I regret the conclusion to which + you have come, though. I would have done my best to help on + the larger movement.... I very willingly acquiesce in the + wisdom of your resolution to accept the position, for it is + one which you may well accept with satisfaction and + thankfulness. You have accomplished what I doubt if any other + man could have even ventured to propose, at so late a period + after Dr. Chalmers' death. It will be a historical fact, made + palpable to succeeding ages, that you have wiped off a + discredit from Scotland's church and nation, by securing a + suitable memorial of one of her most distinguished sons, in + the most conspicuous position the Metropolis could assign to + it. It will be for us of the Free Church to recognise in our + archives the high compliment paid to our illustrious leader + and chief in the great movement of the Disruption by one of + other ecclesiastical convictions and leanings. But we must + always do that under the feeling that it is not in that + character that you know Chalmers; but in the far broader + aspect in which you have so happily celebrated him as a + Christian philanthropist, a patriot, and a divine. + + I conclude with earnest congratulations on the complete + success, as I regard it, of your generous proposal; and I am + yours very truly, + + ROB. S. CANDLISH. + + Rev. Dr. DUFF to DEAN RAMSAY. + + The Grange, 29th June. + + Very Rev. and dear Sir--Many thanks for your kind note with + its enclosures. + + From my sad experience in such matters, I am not at all + surprised at the meagre number of replies to your + printed circular. + + When I first learnt from the newspaper of the meeting held in + your house, and of Dr. Guthrie's proposal, I had a strong + impression that the latter was on far too extensive a + scale--but remained silent, being only anxious, in a quiet + way, to do what I could in promoting the general design. + + Having had much to do during the last forty years with the + raising of funds for all manner of objects, in different + lands, I have come to know something of men's tempers and + dispositions in such cases, and under peculiar circumstances + and conditions. I therefore never expected the L20,000 scheme + to succeed; unless, indeed, it were headed by a dozen or so + at L1000, or at least L500 each--a liberality not to be + expected for such an object at this time of day. + + Your present plan, therefore, I think a wise one--viz., to + constitute yourselves into "a statue committee," for the + successful carrying out of your own original and very + practicable design,--handing over any surplus funds which may + remain to any other committee or body willing to prosecute + the larger professorship or lectureship scheme.--I remain, + very Rev. and dear Sir, yours very sincerely, + + ALEXANDER DUFF. + +I am indebted for the following letters to the Rev. Dr. Lindsay +Alexander. If I wrote only for Scotsmen, it would be unnecessary to +speak of Dr. Alexander as holding a place which he seems to me, ignorant +as I am of Church disputes, to owe to his own high personal merit, and +the independence which makes him free to think and to write as scarcely +any clergyman fettered with the supposed claims of sect or denomination +feels himself at liberty to do. As our Dean got older we find him +drawing more kindly to those whose Christianity was shown in other guise +than in sectarian precision with some spice of persecution. + + 23 Ainslie Place, Feb. 28, 1866. + + I have found, as others have, the "Biblical Commentary" a + very useful companion in sermon-writing. It gives you the + Scripture parallel passages bodily, and saves the trouble of + turning backwards and forwards to find the marginal + references and to examine their relevancy. The work is + published by Bagster, and he generally, I believe, gets his + work pretty well done, and, so far as I can judge, it is + judiciously selected, generally at least. + + Now, dear Dr. Alexander, if you would accept of the copy of + this work which I have sent, and accept it from me, and if it + should prove a useful companion in your homiletical labours, + I should feel much gratified. Perhaps it may be a remembrance + amongst your books, when years have passed away, of one in + his grave who had a sincere regard for you, and who now signs + himself, yours very faithfully, + + E.B. RAMSAY. + + 23 Ainslie Place, Jan. 11, 1866. + + My dear Dr. Alexander--You will not suppose me to be an + advocate for the donkeyism of vestment ritual. But I wish you + not to have unfavourable impressions as regard _our_ concern + with such matters. We have a canon declaratory on vestments, + asserting the ordinary surplice, gown, hood, and stole. It is + stupidly worded, but the meaning is obvious. I was vexed from + your experience to hear of such foolish proceedings at Bridge + of Allan, contrary to canon and to common sense.... The + _green_ part of the dress which caused your wonder, naturally + enough, is not a freak of new vestments, but is a foolish way + which the Glenalmond students have adopted of wearing the + _hood_, which our Bishops (not without diversity of opinion) + had granted for those who had been educated at our College. + It is a hood lined with _green_ (Scottish thistle colour), + and they have a way of wearing it in a manner which brings + the coloured part in front. Pray, pray, don't think of + answering this; it is merely to correct an unfavourable + impression in one whose favourable opinion I much desiderate. + I cannot tell you the pleasure I had in your visit on + Tuesday.--With sincere regard, yours always, E.B. RAMSAY. + + 23 Ainslie Place, June 8, 1866. + + Dear Dr. Alexander--I forgot to mention a circumstance + connected with my story of to-day. I have had a communicant + thereanent with Dr. Robert Lee. The good Dr., although fond + of introducing Episcopalian practices, which cause great + indignation amongst some of his brethren, does not wish it to + be understood that he has the least tendency to become an + Episcopalian himself. In short, he hinted to me himself that + were such an idea to become prevalent it would materially + weaken his influence with many followers. "It is to improve + my own church, not to join yours," were his words, or to that + effect. In carrying out this idea he has a hit in his + "Reformation of the Church of Scotland" against + Episcopalians, and in the first edition he brings up Dean + Ramsay and the unfortunate statement he had made, as a + melancholy proof how hopeless were even the most specious of + the Scottish Episcopal Church on the subject of toleration. I + told him that so far as that statement went it proved + nothing, that it had been wrung from me in an unguarded + moment, and that I had for fourteen years borne unequivocal + testimony to views which were opposite to that statement. He + received the explanation most kindly, and offered to do + anything I wished, but we both at length agreed that the best + plan would be simply to omit it in the second edition, which + was preparing and has since come out. It was omitted. + + I am, dear Dr. Alexander, with true regard, ever yours most + sincerely, E.B. RAMSAY. + + 23 Ainslie Place, August 26, 1867. + + Dear Dr. Alexander--I have lately returned to Edinburgh, + having paid a visit to my own country on Deeside. On Saturday + I drove down to Musselburgh, and had an express object in + calling upon you to ask how you were. But I found I had been + wrong directed to Pinkie Burn, and that to accomplish my + visit, I must have made a _detour_ which would have detained + me too long. I had an engagement waiting me, and I found my + strength pretty well exhausted. I wish, however, to notify my + _intention_ of a visit. I have had a very severe illness + since we met, and have not regained my former position, and + do not think I ever shall. I was very, very close upon the + gate we must all pass, and I believe a few hours longer of + the fever's continuance would have closed the scene. I don't + think I dread to meet death. I have so largely experienced + the goodness of God through (now) a long life, and I feel so + deeply, and I trust so humbly, the power of his grace and + mercy in Christ, that, I can calmly contemplate the approach + of the last hour. But I confess I do shrink from encountering + an undefined period of bodily and mental imbecility; of being + helpless, useless, a burden. I have been so distressed to see + all this come upon our bishop, Dr. Terrot; the once clear, + acute, _sharp_, and ready man. Oh, it is to my mind the most + terrible affliction of our poor nature. I have known lately + an unusual number of such cases before me, and I hope I am + not unreasonably apprehensive as to what may come. I hope + your family all are well, and that you are fully up to your + work in all its forms.--I am, believe me, with much regard, + very sincerely yours, E.B. RAMSAY. + + Without date. + + My dear Dr. Alexander--I feel deeply obliged by your kind + gift to Bishop Whipple. His simple heart will be gratified + much. I am so vexed at having mislaid two letters from him. I + should have liked you to see and to know the bishop by seeing + and reading them. They are _models_ of simple, loving, + Christian feeling. He went to Minnesota as to a new rough + state just added to the United States. He took five + clergymen. He has now above thirty and a college (for which + he asked the books). He is beloved by all, and loves all. The + Red Indians worship him. He is so considerate of them. They + suffer from bad teeth, and on some occasions he has drawn 150 + teeth before a prayer-meeting in the woods, from Indians who + were suffering pain.... + + I will take care Bishop Whipple shall know of your goodness. + I am so vexed I can't find his letters. + + 23 Ainslie Place, Edinburgh, + + November 26, 1871. + + Dear Dr. Alexander--You will be sorry to hear that my + brother, Sir William, is _very_ ill. This morning we had + given up all idea of his rallying, but since that he has + shown symptoms of a more favourable character. His state is + still a very precarious one, and I fear much we must make up + our minds to lose him. God's will be done! We are sure he is + prepared for his change. He has long been a sincere believer + in the great work and offices of the Lord Jesus, and he has + followed up his profession of belief by liberal and judicious + expenditure on benevolent objects. + + I have heard of your being in London at the Revision, and you + may probably be there now. But when you return to Edinburgh, + the Admiral would be most glad to see you when able to call + in Ainslie Place. Sir William is three years younger than I, + but he has had a more trying life. His death (should such be + God's will) must be a great blank for me. But for me it + cannot be a long one.--Hoping you are well, I am, with much + regard, most sincerely yours, E.B. RAMSAY. + +Very soon after the date of this letter Admiral William Ramsay died, who +had lived with his brother the Dean in the most affectionate friendship +for many years. Their duties and interests were identical. William +Ramsay was known as the promoter of every scheme of benevolence in +Edinburgh. + + Right Hon. W.E. GLADSTONE to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Hawarden, December 7, 1871. + + My dear Dean Ramsay--It is with much grief that we have seen + the announcement of the heavy loss you have sustained in the + death of your brother. It was a beautiful union, which is now + for the time dissolved. One has been taken, and the other + left. The stronger frame has been broken, the weaker one + still abides the buffetings of the sea of life. And I feel a + very strong conviction, even at this sad moment, and with + your advancing age, that the balance of your mind and + character will remain unshaken through your habitual and + entire acceptance of the will of God. I write then only to + express my sincere regard for the dead, strong sympathy with + the living. Such as it is, and knowing it to be pure, I offer + it; would it were more worthy, and would that I, let me + rather say--for my wife enters into all these feelings--that + we were able in any way at this especial time to minister to + your comfort. + + I fear the stroke must have come rather suddenly, but no + dispensation could, I think, in the sense really dangerous, + be sudden to you. + + Accept, my dear Dean, our affectionate wishes, and be assured + we enter into the many prayers which will ascend on your + behalf. Your devoted niece will sorely feel this, but it will + be to her a new incentive in the performance of those loving + duties to which she has so willingly devoted her heart and + mind.--Believe me always your affectionate friend, W.E. + GLADSTONE. + + Rev. D.T.K. DRUMMOND to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Montpelier, Thursday. + + My dear Friend--I did not like to intrude on you in the very + freshness of your home sorrow. But you know how much I loved + and respected your brother, and how truly and heartily I + sympathise with you. There were few in Edinburgh so much + beloved as Sir William, and it will be long indeed ere the + memory of his goodness shall pass away. Such men in the + quiet, private, and unassuming walk, are often much more + missed and more extensively lamented than men who have been + more in the eye of the public, and during their life have had + much of public observation and favour. It is trying for us + who are far on in the pilgrimage to see one and another of + our brothers and sisters pass away before us. I have seen + _ten_ go before me, and am the only one left; and yet it + seems as if the old feeling of their leaving us is being + exchanged for the brighter and happier consciousness that + they are coming to meet us, or at least that the gathering + band are BEFORE us, and looking our way, expecting the time + when we too shall pass through the veil, leaning on the arm + of the Beloved. I earnestly pray, my dear friend, for the + Master's loving help and comfort to you from henceforth + even for ever. + + I cannot close this without, in a sentence, expressing my + very great delight in reading your words regarding brotherly + intercommunion among members of Churches who hold the same + Truth, love the same Lord, and are bound to the same "better + land." I do rejoice with all my heart that you have given + utterance to the sentiments so carefully and admirably + expressed by you. I go heart and soul with you in the large + and liberal and Christ-like spirit of the views you propound; + and feel with you that all such brotherly esteem and hearty + and candid co-operation only makes me love my own church + better, because such love is unmixed with the exclusiveness + which sees nothing good save in the Communion to which we + ourselves belong. + + Thank you most heartily for what you have written.--Ever very + affectionately yours, D.T.K. DRUMMOND. + +When the Ramsays were under the necessity of selling most of their +property in the Mearns, the purchaser of Fasque was Mr. Gladstone, not +yet a baronet; and, what does not always happen, the families of the +buyer and the seller continued good friends, and Sir John, the great +merchant, by his advice and perhaps other help, assisted some of the +young Ramsays, who had still to push their way to fortune. I believe +William, afterwards Admiral, was guided by him in the investment and +management of a little money, which prospered, notwithstanding his +innumerable bounties to the poor. The Dean also was obliged to Sir John +Gladstone, but only for kindness and hospitalities. + +On the Ramsays going to London in the summer of 1845, the journal +records what nice rooms they had, and how happy they were at Mr. +Gladstone's, where they saw a good deal of their host--"a man who at +eighty-one possesses the bodily and mental vigour of the prime of life." +The Dean was struck with the old man's abilities. "Mr. Gladstone would +have been successful in any undertaking or any pursuits--a man fitted to +grapple with the highest subjects." + +From that period much intercourse took place between the Premier and our +Dean. There are mutual visits between Hawarden and Edinburgh, and I find +a good deal of correspondence between them; at least I find the letters +on one side. The Dean preserved Mr. Gladstone's letters, but the +counterparts are probably not preserved. One-sided as they are, the +little packet in my hand, of letters from the great Statesman to the +rural clergyman is not without interest. The correspondence has been +friendly, frank and confidential, the writers often differing in +immaterial things, but showing the same liberality in "Church and +State;" so that we are not surprised to find, when the time came, that +of the friends, the churchman approved of Irish disestablishment as +heartily as the layman who was its author. + + Right Hon. W.E. GLADSTONE to DEAN RAMSAY. + + 10 Downing Street, Whitehall, Jan. 20, 1869. + + My dear Dean Ramsay--I need not tell you I am no fit judge of + your brother's claims, but I shall send your letter + privately to the First Lord, who, I am sure, will give it an + impartial and friendly consideration. + + Pray remember me to the Admiral, and be assured it will give + me sincere pleasure if your wish on his behalf can be + gratified. + + I write from Hawarden, but almost _en route_ for London, and + the arduous work before us. + + My mind is cheerful, and even sanguine about it. + + I wish I had some chance or hope of seeing you, and I remain + affectionately yours, W.E. GLADSTONE. + +The Bishop of Salisbury has been for days at the point of death. He is +decidedly better, but cannot recover. Let him have a place in +your prayers. + + Windsor Castle, June 24, 1871. + + My dear Dean Ramsay--The attraction of the Scott Centenary to + Edinburgh is strong, and your affectionate invitation makes + it stronger still. I do not despair of being free, and if + free, I mean to use my freedom, so as to profit by both. At + the same time the delays and obstructions to business have + been so formidable that I must not as yet presume to forecast + the time when I may be able to escape from London, and + therefore I fear I must draw upon your indulgence to allow me + some delay. The session may last far into August, but the + stars may be more propitious. + + We are all grumbling at an unusually cold year, and the + progress of vegetation seems to be suspended, but I trust no + serious harm is yet done; as Louis Napoleon said, _tout peut + se retablir_. + + It would indeed be delightful could I negotiate for a right + to bring you back with me on coming southwards. + + So glad to hear a good account of your health and appearance + from our Lord Advocate; a clever chiel, is he not?--Ever + affectionately yours, W.E. GLADSTONE. + + My wife sends her kind love. + + 10 Downing Street, Whitehall, July 25, 1871. + + My dear Friend--From day to day my hopes of attending the + Scott Centenary have been declining, and I regret much to say + that they are now virtually dead. The extraordinary + obstructions which have been offered to public business + during the present session have now, as you will see, brought + us to such a pass that some suggest an adjournment from + August to some period in the autumn, to enable us to get + through what we have in hand. Whether we do this, or whether + we finish off at once, it is now, I fear, practically certain + that there is no chance of my being free to leave town at the + time of the Centenary. + + We paid Tennyson a visit from last Saturday to Tuesday. He is + a sincere and ardent admirer of Scott, and heartily wishes + well to anything which is likely to keep him before the minds + of the on-coming generation. + + His Sussex abode is beautiful, 600 feet above the sea, with a + splendid view. He seems to be very happy in his family. + + With regard to the Emperor of Brazil, I think any application + made to him would come best from those officially connected + with the celebration. At any rate, I fear it would be + obtrusive on my part to mix in it, as I have no special + relation with him, though he has made a most pleasing + impression on me. + + I now expect to go to Balmoral in the middle of September, + and should much wish to know whether I might visit you on my + way north or south.--Always affectionately yours, W.E. + GLADSTONE. + + 10 Downing Street, Whitehall, August 8, 1871. + + My dear Dean Ramsay--Do what you like with the inclosed. It + is written at the last moment, and because you asked for it, + by a man who was nine hours in the House yesterday, and has + to be there nine to-day, besides a fair share of a day's work + outside it to boot. + + I hope you received a subscription from Royal Bounty which I + sent for Archibald's family. I can give five pounds myself + also.--Ever your affectionate friend, + + W.E. GLADSTONE. + + 11 Carlton House Terrace, S.W., August 8, 1871. + + My dear Dean Ramsay---I wish I could convey to you adequately + the regret with which I find myself cut off from any + possibility of joining in the tribute to be paid to-morrow to + the memory of the first among the sons of Scotland. He was + the idol of my boyhood, and though I well know that my + admiration is worth little, it has never varied. + + In his case the feeling is towards the man as much as towards + his works. Did we not possess a line from his pen, his life + would stand as a true epic. + + I will not say I think him as strong in his modern politics + as in some other points, but I find my general estimate of + the great and heroic whole affected only in the slightest + degree by this point of qualified misgiving. + + If he is out of fashion with some parts of some classes, it + is their misfortune, not his. He is above fluctuations of + time, for his place is in the Band of the Immortals. + + The end of my letter shall be better worth your having than + the beginning. A fortnight ago I visited Tennyson, and found + him possessed with all the sentiments about Scott which your + celebration is meant to foster.--I remain in haste, + affectionately yours. W.E. GLADSTONE. + + Hawarden Castle, Chester, January 12, 1872. + + My dear Dean Ramsay--I was at once obliged, gratified, and + comforted by your letter. This has been a great storm, but it + has not rooted you up, and He whom you live to serve, + evidently has yet more service for you to do. Those remaining + in the world cannot be wife or brother to you, but how many + there are who would if they could, and who will be all + they can! + + The testimonies you send me are full of touching interest. + + My wife has received to-day the beautiful present of the new + edition of your book. She will enjoy it immensely. I hope to + send you, when I get to London, a little work called the + "Mirror of Monks." Let not the title alarm you. It is in the + manner of a Kempis, and is original, as well as excellent and + lofty. I have had much Scotch reading. The "Life of Dr. Lee;" + Macdonald's "Love, Law, and Theology;" last, not least, Lady + Nairne. I am equally struck with her life, and her singularly + beautiful songs, and this though she was Tory and Puritan; I + am opposed to both. Her character brings into view a problem + common to all times, but also I suppose special to this. I + take it that if there is a religious body upon earth that + fully and absolutely deserves the character of schismatical, + it is your Drummond secession. Yet not only is this noble and + holy woman in it, but even my own narrow experience has + supplied me with other types of singular excellence and + elevation within its pale; and the considerations hereby + suggested are of immensely wide application. + + I trust that your Walker Cathedral will be thoroughly good, + and that your Bishop's book is prospering. + + You will be glad to hear that the solemn thanksgiving at St. + Paul's may be regarded as decided on, to my great + satisfaction. + + If you will let me have particulars of any case such as you + describe, I will most readily see what can be done; and now + farewell, my dear friend.--Always affectionately yours, W.E. + GLADSTONE. + +If not quite so popular as some of the Dean's other correspondents, he +whose letter I bring forward here stood as high as any man in the +estimation of the better and most thinking classes of Scotsmen. + +Thomas Erskine of Linlathen, though no clergyman, had his mind more +constantly full of divine thoughts than most priests; though no +technical scholar perhaps, he kept up his Greek to read Plato, and did +not think that his enjoyment of the works of high reach in classical +times unfitted him for Bible studies, which were the chief object of his +existence. + + * * * * * +THOMAS ERSKINE to DEAN RAMSAY. + + 127 George Street, 19th Oct. 1869. + + Dear Dean--I return you many thanks for that kind letter. + Neither you nor I can now be far from death--that commonest + of all events, and yet the most unknown. The majority of + those with whom you and I have been acquainted, have passed + through it, but their experience does not help us except by + calling us to prepare for it. _One_ man indeed--the Head and + Lord of men--has risen from the dead, thereby declaring death + overcome, and inviting us all to share in his victory. And + yet we feel that the victory over death cannot deliver us + from fear, unless there be also a victory over that which + makes death terrible--a victory over him that hath the power + of death, that is the devil, or prince and principle of sin. + And our Lord has achieved this also, for he put away sin _by + the sacrifice of himself_; but this sacrifice can only really + profit us when it is reproduced in us--when we, as branches + of the true Vine, live by the sap of the root, which sap is + _filial trust_, the only principle which can sacrifice + _self_, because the only principle which can enable us to + commit ourselves _unreservedly_ into the hands of God for + guidance and for disposal. We are thus _put right_ by _trust, + justified_ or _put right_ by faith in the loving fatherly + righteous purpose of God towards us. + + Dear George Dundas's death has taken from me my chief social + support in Edinburgh. I was fourteen years his senior, but I + had known and loved him from his childhood. Our mothers were + sisters, and thus we had the same family ties and traditions. + I think of him now in connection with that verse, "to those + who by patient continuance in well-doing," etc. + + And now farewell. Let us seek to live by the faith of the Son + of God--his filial trust I suppose, which I so much + need.--Ever truly and gratefully yours, + + T. ERSKINE. + + * * * * * + +The three following letters hardly help on the story of the Dean's life, +but I could not pass them when they came into my hands. + +The writer is Adam Sedgwick, the well-known Cambridge Professor and +Philosopher. In another capacity he was still better known. He was tutor +and vice-master of Trinity, and in his time an outside stranger of any +education, even a half-educated Scot, dropping into Cambridge society, +found a reception to be remembered. Take for choice one of their +peculiar festivals--Trinity Sunday comes to my mind--the stranger +partook of the splendid feast in that princely hall of Trinity, where +the massive college plate was arrayed and the old college customs of +welcome used, not from affectation, but kindly reverence. When the +dinner was over, the large party of Doctors and Fellows, with hundreds +of the noble youth of England, all in surplice, moved to the chapel, all +joining with reverence in the august service of the church, and later, +they and their guests, or as many as could be held, crossed to the +Combination Room, where Sedgwick filled the chair, and led the +conversation, not to glorify himself, not to display his own powers, +which were great, but to let his guests know among whom they were +placed--philosophers, first men of science, first scholars, leaders in +all kinds of learning, meeting in a noble equality, proud to meet under +his presidency--_that_ I take to be the highest triumph of civilised +hospitality. At the time of these letters the philosopher is old, but +vigorous in mind, and even gay at the age of eighty-eight. + +The death of Bishop Terrot called forth the following letter from the +venerable Professor:-- + + * * * * * + + PROFESSOR SEDGWICK to the Rev. Mr. MALCOLM. + + Trinity College, Cambridge, May 1, 1872. + + Dear Mr. Malcolm--I had been previously informed of the death + of my dear old friend, the Bishop of Edinburgh, but I am very + grateful to you for thinking so kindly of me, and for + communicating particulars about which I was not acquainted + previously. Accept my expressions of true-hearted sympathy, + and pray impart them to the surviving members of dear Bishop + Terrot's family. He was an old, an honoured and beloved + friend; God laid upon his old age an unusual load of the + labours and sorrows of humanity, but they are over now, and + he has reached his haven of shelter from external sorrow and + his true and enduring home of joy and peace, in the presence + of his Maker and Redeemer. I am very infirm, and am affected + by an internal malady, which, through the past winter, has + confined me to my college rooms, but I have to thank my Maker + for thousands of little comforts to mind and body, by which + I am hourly surrounded, and for His long-suffering in + extending my probation till I have entered on my 88th year. + My eyes are dim-sighted and irritable, so that I generally + dictate my letters; now, however, I am using my own pen to + express my thanks to you, in this time of your sorrow for the + loss of one so nearly and dearly connected with your clerical + life. My memory is not much shaken, except in recalling names + not very familiar to me, and I think (with the painful + exception I have alluded to) that my constitutional health is + sound. When my friends call upon me, my deafness generally + compels me to use an ear-trumpet, and I yesterday took it to + our college walks, to try if I could catch the notes of the + singing birds, which were piping all round me. But, alas! I + could not hear the notes of the singing birds, though I did + catch the harsher and louder notes of the rooks, which have + their nests in some college grounds. + + May the remaining years of your life be cheered and animated + by good abiding Christian hope.--I remain very faithfully + yours, ADAM SEDGWICK. + + * * * * * + + PROFESSOR SEDGWICK to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Trinity College, Cambridge, + + 29th May 1872. + + My dear Dean--I this morning received your kind presentation + copy of your Reminiscences, which I shall highly value for + its own sake, and as your gift. I read little now because my + eyes are both dim-sighted and very irritable; but your book + will just suit me, as it is not a continuous tale, but a + succession of tales, each of which is perfect in itself, and + I hope to read it bit by bit without worrying my enfeebled + powers of sight. + + I meant to have thanked you in an autograph, but there has + been a sudden change in the atmosphere, which is dark, heavy + and wet, and when there is a defect of light I am almost + constrained to dictate my letters to my _factotum_. + + I am delighted, too, with the single sheet containing verses + addressed to yourself. The first copy by Bishop Wordsworth + appears to me quite admirable from the beauty and simplicity + of his Latin; and the other copies are good in their way. + + I dare say you have seen the short verses he wrote on the + death of his first wife. They are of Roman brevity and of + exquisite tenderness. + + One of the very pleasant days of my life was spent in a visit + to the small country living of Mr. Dawes of Downing, + afterwards Dean of Hereford. Your late brother was one of the + happy party. We returned together to Cambridge at a rattling + pace, and I am not sure that I ever saw his face afterwards, + for very soon he had a bilious attack which induced him to + seek health in his native country, and, alas! he sought it in + vain, for he sickened and died, to the deep sorrow of all his + friends.--I remain, my dear Dean, very truly and + gratefully yours, + + A. SEDGWICK. + + * * * * * + + PROFESSOR SEDGWICK to Rev. Mr. MALCOLM. + + Trinity College, Cambridge, + + January 18, 1873. + + My dear Mr. Malcolm--The infirmity of my sight compels me to + dictate this letter to one who often writes for me. Such a + bright day as this, and while the sun is shining, I could see + the traces of my pen upon a sheet of paper; but the act of + writing greatly fatigues me, and I dictate nearly all + my letters. + + I very much value your melancholy memorial of my late dear + and honoured friend, the late Bishop Terrot. Though the photo + represents our late friend the bishop with his features + shrouded in the cold fixity of death, yet it does bring back + the original to the memory of those who knew him well, and I + am greatly obliged to you for this memorial of one who has + gone from our sight for ever, so far as this world is + concerned. It was very kind of you to remember the photo. + + I did not know Bishop Cotterell intimately, but I have met + him many times, and I think you very happy in obtaining the + services of a man of such experience, talent, and zeal, in + the good cause of Christian truth. + + I am now a very feeble, infirm, old man, toiling in the last + quarter of my 88th year. I ought to be thankful that my mind, + though feeble, remains entire: my memory is often defective, + but I have been enabled, though with great labour to myself, + and with many interruptions, to dictate a preface to a + catalogue published by the university of the older fossils of + our collection. They have kindly printed and given to me some + extra copies of my preface, one of which I will forward to + you by the book-post. + + I know it can have no interest to you, excepting, perhaps, a + few paragraphs in the conclusion of only two or three + pages.--I remain, my dear Mr. Malcolm, very faithfully and + gratefully yours, A. SEDGWICK. + +I have printed already more than one letter from the Rev. D.T.K. +Drummond, from admiration of their intrinsic merit, and because I wish +here to collect proofs that no diversity of Church rites or Church +policy could separate our Dean from brethren whom he regarded perhaps as +erroneous, but recognised as teaching and leading by the same principles +of freedom, which he himself revered and followed. + + Rev. D.T.K. DRUMMOND to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Montpelier, Saturday. + + My dear Friend--Very many thanks for your most touching note, + and for the extract from your book you so kindly sent me. The + more I look into it the more I like it, and thank God for + the testimony you so unequivocally and fearlessly hear to the + _unity_ of the True Church of Christ of any age, however much + the great army he made up of various sections, of diverse + uniforms, and with special duties to perform..... + + Again thanking you very warmly, and earnestly praying for all + the precious consolations of the Great Head of the Church to + be largely vouchsafed to you, believe me to be always most + affectionately yours, + + D. T. K. DRUMMOND. + + * * * * * + +The subject of the following letter cannot be overlooked by a biographer +of Dean Ramsay:-- + + Rev. Dr. CANDLISH to DEAN RAMSAY. + + 52 Melville Street, 18th March 1872. + + My dear Dean Ramsay--I have just read with most profound + thankfulness and admiration your noble Christian letter in + this day's _Scotsman_. I cannot deny myself the gratification + of expressing my feelings to you in this feeble + acknowledgment. You have done a signal service to the cause + of our Blessed Lord and common Master. I am too infirm to + write more fully all that is in my heart. You will pardon all + defects, and believe me, yours very truly, + + ROB. S. CANDLISH. + +The letter referred to by the distinguished divine arose out of what is +known in the Scottish Episcopal Church as the _cause celebre_ of the +Bishop of Glasgow against the Bishop of Argyll. + +The Rev. Dr. Caird, of the University of Glasgow, having invited the +Bishop of Argyll to preach to a mixed Episcopalian and Presbyterian +congregation, using his Church's liturgy, from the University pulpit of +Glasgow, the Bishop of Glasgow interposed to prevent it. + +The interference of the Bishop of Glasgow with his brother prelate of +Argyll called forth a letter from Dean Ramsay, which appeared in the +_Scottish Guardian_ on 15th March 1872, and in the _Scotsman_ three days +later. In it the Dean in fact asserts a religious sympathy towards those +who differ from him, comprehensive enough to include all his Protestant +countrymen. + +"In an address to the Bishop of Glasgow, signed by sixty-two clergymen, +it is stated that the service contemplated in the chapel of the +University of Glasgow would be a 'lax proceeding, and fraught with great +injury to the highest interests of the Church,' Accordingly the Bishop +of Glasgow prohibited the service, to guard the Church from complicity +in a measure which he considered subversive of her position in this +country.' In other words," says Dean Ramsay, "we are called upon to +believe that, as members of the Scottish Episcopal Church, it is our +bounden duty to withhold every appearance of any religious sympathy with +our Presbyterian fellow-countrymen and fellow-Christians. I now solemnly +declare for myself that, had I come to the conclusion that such was the +teaching of our Church, and such the views to which I was bound--viz. +that her object was thus to sever man from man, and to maintain that the +service proposed at Glasgow was really 'fraught with great injury to the +highest interests of my Church,' because it would promote union and +peace--the sun should not again set till I had given up all official +connection with a Church of which the foundations and the principles +would be so different from the landmarks and leading manifestations of +our holy faith itself. Were the principles and conduct laid down in this +address and in the answer to it fairly carried out, I cannot see any +other result than the members of our Church considering the whole of +Scotland which is external to our communion as a land of infidels, with +whom we can have no spiritual connection, and whom, indeed, we could +hardly recognise as a Christian people." + +The Dean's letter is chiefly remarkable as showing that age had not +frozen his charity. It called forth many letters like that of Dr. +Candlish, and one from the little Somersetshire society which he +loved so well. + + JOHN SHEPPARD, Esq., Frome, to DEAN RAMSAY. + + The Cottage, Frome, 21st March 1872. + + Very dear and reverend Sir--I have to thank you for the + _Scottish Guardian_ which you have kindly sent me. I regret + the divisions which appear to have arisen in your church. + Whatever comes from your pen has special interest for me; and + I am glad to see it (as it always has been) pleading the + cause of Christian charity. It appears to me that the welfare + of your church would have been promoted by acceding to the + invitation, + + I think I have mentioned to you that we had lately a visit + from good Archdeacon Sandford, which we much enjoyed. We + learn with sorrow that since attendance at the Convocation + and a stay at Lambeth Palace, he has been suffering great + weakness and exhaustion, and been confined to his bed for a + month. He is now slowly recovering; but we fear his + exertions have been beyond his strength, and that his life + must be very precarious. + + I hope your health is not more seriously impaired; but we + must be looking more and more, dear sir, towards the home + which pain and strife cannot enter. + + My beloved Susan is very zealous as the animals' friend, and + birds of many sorts welcome and solicit her as their + patroness. She desires to be most kindly remembered to you, + with, my dear Dean, your attached old friend, + + JOHN SHEPPARD. + + _P.S._--Susan instructs me to say for her that, "since + reading your letter to the _Guardian_, she loves you more + than ever, if possible." My words are cool in comparison with + hers; and this is a curious message for an ancient husband + to convey. + + She thinks we have not thanked you for the Bishop's Latin + verses and the translations of them. If we have not, it is + not because our "_reminiscences_" of you are faint or few. + +I wish to preserve a note of a dear old friend of my own, whose talents, +perhaps I might say whose genius, was only shrouded by his modesty. I +know that the Dean felt how gratifying it was to find among his +congregation men of such accomplishment, such scholarship, as George +Moir and George Dundas, and it is something to show that they responded +very heartily to that feeling. + + GEORGE MOIR to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Monday morning, 14 Charlotte Square. + + My dear Dean--My condition renders it frequently impossible + to attend church, from the difficulty I have in remaining for + any length of time. But I have been able to be present the + last two Sundays, and I cannot refrain from saying with how + much pleasure I listened yesterday to your discourse on + charity. It was not unworthy of the beautiful passage which + formed its ground-work; clear, consecutive, eloquent, and + with a moral application of which I wish we may all avail + ourselves. + + Long may you continue to advise and instruct those who are + _to come after me_. + + I was delighted to see you looking so well, and to notice the + look of vigour with which the discourse was delivered. + Believe me ever most truly yours, GEO. MOIR. + +In 1866 the Dean had delivered two lectures upon "Preachers and +Preaching," but which were afterwards published in a volume called +_Pulpit Table-Talk_. That is the subject of the following letter from a +great master of the art:-- + + Dr. GUTHRIE to DEAN RAMSAY. + + Inchgrundle, Tarfside, by Brechin, + + 31st August 1868. + + My dear Mr. Dean--Your Pulpit Table-Talk has been sent here + to gratify, delight, and edify me. A most entertaining book; + and full of wise and admirable sentiments. All ministers and + preachers should read and digest it. Age seems to have no + more dulling effect on you than it had on Sir David Brewster, + who retained, after he had turned the threescore and ten, all + the greenery, foliage, and flowers of youth--presenting at + once the freshness of Spring, and the flowers of Summer, and + the precious fruits of Autumn. + + May your bow long abide in strength! and the evening of your + days be calm and peaceful, bright with the sure and certain + hope of that better world, where, I hope, we shall meet to be + for ever with the Lord! With the greatest respect and + affectionate regards, yours ever, + + THOMAS GUTHRIE. + +I cannot fix the date of the following anecdote, nor does the date much +matter:--Some years ago a child, the son of the U.P. minister of +Dunblane, was so dangerously ill, that a neighbouring lady, the wife of +the Episcopal clergyman, who was much interested in the little boy, +asked her husband if it might be permitted to beg the prayers of the +congregation for his recovery. The clergyman readily assented; and when +the facts came to the knowledge of Dean Ramsay, and that it was a +suggestion of a dear friend of his, he sent the lady a copy of his +_Reminiscences_, with a letter to her husband, in which he says--"I was +greatly charmed with your account of prayers offered up for poor little +Blair. Tell your Mary I love her more than ever. It has quite affected +me, her proposing it." The husband is the Rev. Mr. Malcolm; the lady his +wife, daughter of the Dean's dear friend, Bishop Terrot. + +But the end was approaching. In December 1872 it was noticed with sorrow +that for the first time since the commencement of the Church Society +(1838), of which Ramsay was really the founder, the Dean was absent from +the annual meeting of the general committee. Soon it became known that +his illness was more than a mere passing attack. During its continuance +the deepest interest was manifested in every quarter. Each day, and +"almost from hour to hour, the latest tidings were eagerly sought for. +In many churches and in many families besides those of our communion, +prayers were offered for his recovery. And when at last it became known +that he had indeed passed away from this life, it was felt that we had +lost not only a venerable Father of the Church, but one whose name, +familiar as a household word, was always associated with kindly loving +thoughts and deeds--one who was deservedly welcome wherever he went, and +whose influence was always towards peace and goodwill." The Rev. Mr. +Montgomery, our present Dean of Edinburgh, whose words I quote, truly +says that "he was a Churchman by conviction, but was ever ready to meet, +and, where occasion offered, to act with others upon the basis of a +common humanity and common Christianity." + +FOOTNOTES: + +[9] The margin seems to show that this page of the journal was not +written till 1843. + +[10] The Bishop said that the two impediments to profitable or amusing +conversation were _humdrum_ and _humbug_. + +On another occasion, the Bishop having expressed his doubt of the truth +of spirit-rapping, table-turning, etc., and being pressed with the +appeal, "Surely you must admit these are indications of Satanic agency," +quietly answered, "It may be so, but it must be a mark of Satan being in +a state of dotage!" + +[11] Alluditur ad titulum libri _Reminiscences_, etc. + +[12] Here is the passage referred to by Mr. Dickens:--"There are persons +who do not sympathise with my great desire to preserve and to +disseminate these specimens of Scottish humour; indeed, I have reasons +to suspect that some have been disposed to consider the time and +attention which I have given to the subject as ill-bestowed, or at any +rate, as somewhat unsuitable to one of my advanced age and sacred +profession. If any persons do really think so, all I can say is, I do +not agree with them. National peculiarities must ever form an +interesting and improving study, inasmuch as it is a study of human +nature; and the anecdotes of this volume all tend to illustrate features +of the Scottish mind, which, as moral and religious traits of character, +are deeply interesting. I am convinced that every one, whether clergyman +or layman, who contributes to the innocent enjoyment of human life, has +joined in a good work, inasmuch as he has diminished the inducement to +_vicious_ indulgence. God knows there is enough of sin and of sorrow in +the world to make sad the heart of every Christian man. No one, I think, +need be ashamed of his endeavours to cheer the darker hours of his +fellow-travellers' steps through life, or to beguile the hearts of the +weary and the heavy laden, if only for a time, into cheerful and amusing +trains of thought. So far as my experience of life goes, I have never +found that the cause of morality and religion was promoted by sternly +checking the tendencies of our nature to relaxation and amusement. If +mankind be too ready to enter upon pleasures which are dangerous or +questionable, it is the part of wisdom and of prudence to supply them +with sources of interest, the enjoyment of which are innocent and +permissible." + + + +APPENDIX. + + * * * * * + +When this Memoir was only begun I was anxious to say something of the +Dean's musical powers; and, not venturing to speak of music myself, I +asked the Dean's sister Lady Burnett to supply my deficiency. In reply I +had the following letter:-- + + 22d February 1873. + + ... As a flute-player the Dean attained a proficiency rarely + seen in an amateur, and used frequently to play the very + difficult flute-obligatos of some of Handel's songs, which + are considered a hard task even for professionals. Besides + playing the flute he was thoroughly conversant with the + mechanism of the organ, and had some knowledge of the + violoncello, though he never gave much time to the study of + that instrument. But perhaps the most interesting point in + this part of the character of my brother was his ardent love + for Handel's music. There was not a song or chorus of the + great master that he was not acquainted with, and in his + younger days he used to sing the bass music from the Messiah + and other Oratorios with great taste and skill--his voice, a + fine mellow baritone, being well suited to these songs. You + may remember his lectures on Handel delivered at the + Philosophical Institution some years ago, and how + enthusiastic he was when describing the manifold beauties of + his favourite composer, and how interested and eager he + became when the choir sang the music he knew and loved + so well.... + + I wrote this on Saturday evening when sitting alone, + thinking of the great loss I had sustained; the variety there + was in Edward's character; how accomplished he was; what + knowledge he had on many subjects; his fine taste, his + gentleness and Christian piety; and then his strong sense of + humour and fun; how amusing he was, and such droll things + broke out every now and then! even to the very last so genial + and social, and altogether such a man that we "ne'er shall + look upon his like again."--Yours very sincerely, LAUDERDALE + BURNETT. + + + +REMINISCENCES. + + + +PREFACE + +TO + +TWENTY-SECOND EDITION. + +In preparing another duodecimo edition of the "Reminiscences of Scottish +Life and Character," I gladly avail myself of the opportunity afforded +me of reproducing some of the materials which had been added to the +octavo edition, especially that part at page 322, etc., which advocated +a modified interchange of pulpits between Episcopalian and Presbyterian +clergymen; to add also some excellent Scottish stories which had been +sent to me by kind friends. I am desirous also of repeating the +correction of an error into which we had fallen in copying the account +of a toast in the Highland form, which had been kindly contributed by +the respected minister of Moulin, in the octavo edition at page 70. To +Lowland conceptions, the whole proceeding has somewhat the appearance of +a respectable company at once becoming insane; still it ought to be +correct, and the printer had, by mistake, inserted a word that has no +existence in the Gaelic language. The text reads-- + + "Lud ris! Lud ris! You again! you again!" + +It should be + + Sud ris! Sud ris! Yon again! yon again! + +that is--"you cheer again." + +The demand for a twenty-second edition of a volume of "Scottish +Reminiscences" embracing subjects which are necessarily of a limited and +local character--a demand which has taken place during the course of +little more than fifteen years since its first publication--proves, I +think, the correctness of the idea upon which it was first +undertaken--viz. that it should depict a phase of national manners which +was fast passing away, and thus, in however humble a department, +contribute something to the materials of history, by exhibiting social +customs and habits of thought which at a particular era were +characteristic of a race. It may perhaps be very fairly said that the +Reminiscences came out at a time specially suitable to rescue these +features of national life and character from oblivion. They had _begun_ +to fade away, and many had, to the present generation, become obsolete. + +To those who have not given their attention to the subject for the +elucidation of which this volume has been written, I would present two +specimens of the sort of materials from which they may expect to find +these Reminiscences are compiled. They are chosen to indicate a style of +life and manners now fast fading away, and are taken from a period which +lies within the scope of our own recollections. Now, a subject like this +can only be illustrated by a copious application of anecdotes which must +show the features of the past. And let me premise that I make use of +anecdotes not for the purpose of telling a good story, but solely in the +way of _illustration_. I am quite certain that there was an originality, +a dry and humorous mode of viewing persons and events, quite _peculiar_ +to the older Scottish characters. And I am equally certain, that their +peculiar humour can only be exhibited in examples. From the late Mr. +Erskine of Linlathan I received the following:--Mr. Erskine recollected +an old housekeeper at Airth, who belonged to this class of character. A +speech of this Mrs. Henderson was preserved in the family as having been +made by her at the time of the execution of Louis XVI. in 1793. She was +noticing the violent emotion exhibited by Mr. Bruce of Kinnaird, the +Abyssinian traveller, at the sad event which had just taken place, and +added, in the following quaint and caustic terms, "There's Kinnaird +greeting as if there was nae a saunt on earth but himsel' and the king +o' France." How utterly unlike anything that would be said on such an +occasion by an English person in the same position in life! + +For the same purpose, let me introduce a characteristic little Scottish +scene, which my cousin, the late Sir Thomas Burnett of Leys, used to +describe with great humour. Sir Thomas had a tenant on his estate, a +very shrewd clever man, whom he was sometimes in the habit of consulting +about country matters. On one occasion he came over to Crathes Castle, +and asked to see Sir Thomas. He was accordingly ushered in, accompanied +by a young man of very simple appearance, who gazed about the room in a +stupid vacant manner. The old man began by saying that he understood +there was a farm on the estate to be let, and that he knew a very fine +young man whom he wished to recommend as tenant. He said he had plenty +of _siller_, and had studied farming on the most approved +principles--sheep-farming in the Highlands, cattle-farming in the +Lowlands, and so forth, and, in short, was a model farmer. When he had +finished his statement, Sir Thomas, looking very significantly at his +companion, addressed the old man (as he was usually addressed in the +county by the name of his farm)--"Well, Drummy, and is this your friend +whom you propose for the farm?" to which Drummy replied, "Oh fie, na. +Hout! that is a kind o' a _Feel_, a friend (_i.e._ a relation) o' the +wife's, and I just brought him ower wi' me to show him the place." + +The question of change in the "life and character" of a people, during +the period embraced in the reminiscences of an aged individual, must +always be a subject for deep and serious consideration. In the case of +Scotland, such changes comprise much that is interesting and amusing. +But they also contain much matter for serious thought and reflection to +the lovers of their country. In preparing the present edition of these +Reminiscences, I have marked out many further changes, and have marked +them from a deep feeling of interest in the moral and religious +improvement of my country. To my readers I say that I hope we have all +learned to view such changes under a more serious national aspect than a +mere question of amusement or speculation. The Christian, when he looks +around him on society, must observe many things which, as a patriot, he +wishes might be permanent, and he marks many things which, as a patriot, +he wishes were obliterated. What he desires should be enduring in his +countrymen is, that abiding attributes of Scottish character should be +associated amongst all men with truth and virtue--with honour and kindly +feelings--with temperance and self-denial--with divine faith and +love--with generosity and benevolence. On the other hand, he desires +that what may become questions of tradition, and, in regard to his own +land, REMINISCENCES of Scottish life, shall be--cowardice and folly, +deceit and fraud, the low and selfish motives to action which make men +traitors to their God and hateful to their fellow-men. + +It would be worse than affectation--it would be ingratitude--to disclaim +being deeply impressed by the favourable reception which has for so long +a time been given to these Reminiscences at home, in India, in America, +and in all countries where Scotchmen are to be found. + +It is not the least of the enjoyments which I have had in compiling +these pages, to hear of the kind sympathy which they have called forth +in other minds, and often in the minds of strangers; and it would be +difficult for me to describe the pleasure I have received when told by a +friend that this work had cheered him in the hour of depression or of +sickness--that even for a few moments it may have beguiled the weight of +corroding care and worldly anxiety. I have been desirous of saying a +word in favour of old Scottish life; and with some minds, perhaps, the +book may have promoted a more kindly feeling towards hearts and heads of +bygone days. And certainly I can now truly say, that my highest +reward--my greatest honour and gratification--would spring from the +feeling that it might become a standard volume in Scottish cottage +libraries, and that by the firesides of Scotland these pages might +become as Household Words. + + EDINBURGH, 23 AINSLIE PLACE. + _St. Andrew's Day_[13] + +FOOTNOTES: + +[13] These words, "St. Andrew's Day," were deleted by the Dean; and +though he lived till the 27th December, he did not touch the +proof-sheets after the 19th November 1872. + + + +REMINISCENCES + +OF + +SCOTTISH LIFE AND CHARACTER. + + * * * * * + +CHAPTER THE FIRST. + +INTRODUCTORY. + +I wish my readers always to bear in mind that these Reminiscences are +meant to bear upon the changes which would include just such a +revolution as that referred to at page 15 in the bonnet practice of +Laurencekirk. There is no pretension to any researches of _antiquarian_ +character; they are in fact Reminiscences which come almost within +personal recognition. A kind friend gave me anecdotes of the past in her +hundredth year. In early life I was myself consigned to the care of my +grand-uncle, Sir Alexander Ramsay, residing in Yorkshire, and he was +born in 1715; so that I can go pretty far back on my own experience, and +have thus become cognisant of many changes which might be expected as a +consequence of such experience. + +I cannot imagine a better illustration of the sort of change in the +domestic relations of life that has taken place in something like the +time we speak of, than is shown in the following anecdote, which was +kindly communicated to me by Professor MacGregor of the Free Church. I +have pleasure in giving it in the Professor's own words:--"I happened +one day to be at Panmure Castle when Lord Panmure (now Dalhousie) was +giving a treat to a school, and was presented by the Monikie Free Church +Deacons' Court with a Bible on occasion of his having cleared them +finally of debt on their buildings. Afterwards his Lordship took me into +the library, where, among other treasures, we found a handsome folio +_Prayer Book_ presented to his ancestor Mr. Maule of Kelly by the +Episcopalian minister of the district, on occasion of his having, by Mr. +Maule's help, been brought out of jail. The coincidence and contrast +were curiously interesting." + +For persons to take at various intervals a retrospective view of life, +and of the characters they have met with, seems to be a natural feeling +of human nature; and every one is disposed at times to recall to memory +many circumstances and many individuals which suggest abundant subjects +for reflection. We thus find recollections of scenes in which we have +been joyous and happy. We think of others with which we only associate +thoughts of sorrow and of sadness. Amongst these varied emotions we find +subjects for reminiscences, of which we would bury the feelings in our +own hearts as being too sacred for communication with others. Then, +again, there are many things of the past concerning which we delight to +take counsel with friends and contemporaries. Some persons are disposed +to go beyond these personal communications with friends, and having +through life been accustomed to write down memoranda of their own +feelings, have published them to the world. Many interesting works have +thus been contributed to our literature by writers who have sent forth +volumes in the form of _Memoirs of their Own Times, Personal +Recollections, Remarks upon Past Scenes_, etc. etc. It is not within +the scope of this work to examine these, nor can I specify the many +communications I have from different persons, both at home and in our +colonial possessions; in fact, the references in many cases have been +lost or mislaid. But I must acknowledge, however briefly, my obligations +to Dr. Carruthers, Inverness, and to Dr. Cook, Haddington, who have +favoured me with valuable contributions. + +Now, when we come to examine the general question of memoirs connected +with contemporary history, no work is better known in connection with +this department of Scottish literature than the _History of his Own +Times_, by my distinguished relative, Dr. Gilbert Burnett, Bishop of +Salisbury. Bishop Burnett's father, Lord Crimond, was third son of my +father's family, the Burnetts of Leys, in Kincardineshire. There is now +at Crathes Castle, the family seat, a magnificent full-length portrait +of the Bishop in his robes, as Prelate of the Garter, by Sir Godfrey +Kneller. It was presented by himself to the head of his family. But, as +one great object of the Bishop's history was to laud and magnify the +personal character and public acts of William of Orange, his friend and +patron, and as William was held in special abhorrence by the Jacobite +party in Scotland, the Bishop holds a prominent, and, with many, a very +odious position in Scottish Reminiscences; in fact, he drew upon himself +and upon his memory the determined hatred and unrelenting hostility of +adherents to the Stuart cause. They never failed to abuse him on all +occasions, and I recollect old ladies in Montrose, devoted to the exiled +Prince, with whom the epithet usually applied to the Prelate was that of +"Leein' Gibby[14]." + +Such language has happily become a "Reminiscence." Few would be found +now to apply such an epithet to the author of the _History of his Own +Times_, and certainly it would not be applied on the ground of the +Jacobite principles to which he was opposed. But a curious additional +proof of this hostility of Scottish Jacobites to the memory of Burnett +has lately come to light. In a box of political papers lately found at +Brechin Castle, belonging to the Panmure branch of the family, who, in +'15, were forfeited on the ground of their Jacobite opinions and +adherence to the cause of Charles Edward, there has been found a severe +and bitter supposed _epitaph_ for Bishop Burnett. By the kindness of the +Earl of Dalhousie I was permitted to see this epitaph, and, if I chose, +to print it in this edition. I am, however, unwilling to stain my pages +with such an ungenerous and, indeed, I may say, so scurrilous a +representation of the character of one who, in the just opinion of our +Lyon King-at-Arms, himself a Burnett of the Kemnay branch, has +characterised the Bishop of Salisbury as "true and honest, and far +beyond the standard of his times as a Clergyman and as a Bishop." But +the epitaph found in these Panmure papers shows clearly the prejudices +of the age in which it was written, and in fact only embodies something +of that spirit and of those opinions which we have known as still +lingering in our own Reminiscences. + +If it were not on my part a degree of presumption, I might be inclined +to consider myself in this volume a fellow-labourer with the late +accomplished and able Mr. Robert Chambers. In a very limited sphere it +takes a portion of the same field of illustration. I should consider +myself to have done well if I shall direct any of my readers to his able +volumes. Whosoever wishes to know what this country really was in times +past, and to learn, with a precision beyond what is supplied by the +narratives of history, the details of the ordinary current of our +social, civil, and national life, must carefully study the _Domestic +Annals of Scotland_. Never before were a nation's domestic features so +thoroughly portrayed. Of those features the specimens of quaint Scottish +humour still remembered are unlike anything else, but they are fast +becoming obsolete, and my motive for this publication has been an +endeavour to preserve marks of the past which would of themselves soon +become obliterated, and to supply the rising generation with pictures of +social life, faded and indistinct to their eyes, but the strong lines of +which an older race still remember. By thus coming forward at a +favourable moment, no doubt many beautiful specimens of SCOTTISH +MINSTRELSY have in this manner been preserved from oblivion by the +timely exertions of Bishop Percy, Ritson, Walter Scott, and others. Lord +Macaulay, in his preface to _The Lays of Ancient Rome_, shows very +powerfully the tendency in all that lingers in the memory to become +obsolete, and he does not hesitate to say that "Sir Walter Scott was but +_just in time_ to save the precious relics of the minstrelsy of +the Border." + +It is quite evident that those who have in Scotland come to an advanced +age, must have found some things to have been really changed about them, +and that on them great alterations have already taken place. There are +some, however, which yet may be in a transition state; and others in +which, although changes are threatened, still it cannot be said that the +changes are begum I have been led to a consideration of impending +alterations as likely to take place, by the recent appearance of two +very remarkable and very interesting papers on subjects closely +connected with great social Scottish questions, where a revolution of +opinion may be expected. These are two articles in _Recess Studies_ +(1870), a volume edited by our distinguished Principal, Sir Alexander +Grant. One essay is by Sir Alexander himself, upon the "Endowed +Hospitals of Scotland;" the other by the Rev. Dr. Wallace of the +Greyfriars, upon "Church Tendencies in Scotland." It would be quite +irrelevant for me to enlarge here upon the merits of those articles. No +one could study them attentively without being impressed with the +ability and power displayed in them by the authors, their grasp of the +subjects, and their fair impartial judgment upon the various questions +which come under their notice. + +From these able disquisitions, and from other prognostics, it is quite +evident that sounder principles of political economy and accurate +experience of human life show that much of the old Scottish hospital +system was quite wrong and must be changed. Changes are certainly going +on, which seem to indicate that the very hard Presbyterian views of some +points connected with Church matters are in transition. I have elsewhere +spoken of a past sabbatarian strictness, and I have lately received an +account of a strictness in observing the national fast-day, or day +appointed for preparation in celebrating Holy Communion, which has in +some measure passed away. The anecdote adduced the example of two +drovers who were going on very quietly together. They had to pass +through a district whereof one was a parishioner, and during their +progress through it the one whistled with all his might, the other +screwed up his mouth without emitting a single sound. When they came to +a burn, the silent one, on then crossing the stream, gave a skip, and +began whistling with all his might, exclaiming with great triumph to his +companion, "I'm beyond the parish of Forfar now, and I'll whistle as +muckle as I like." It happened to be the Forfar parish fast-day. But a +still stricter observance was shown by a native of Kirkcaldy, who, when +asked by his companion drover in the south of Scotland "why he didna +whistle," quietly answered, "I canna, man; it's our fast-day in +Kirkcaldy." I have an instance of a very grim assertion of extreme +sabbatarian zeal. A maid-servant had come to a new place, and on her +mistress quietly asking her on Sunday evening to wash up some dishes, +she indignantly replied, "Mem, I hae dune mony sins, and hae mony sins +to answer for; but, thank God, I hae never been sae far left to mysell +as to wash up dishes on the Sabbath day." + +I hope it will not for a moment be supposed we would willingly throw any +ridicule or discouragement on the Scottish national tendencies on the +subject, or that we are not proud of Scotland's example of a sacred +observance of the fourth commandment in the letter and the spirit. We +refer now to injudicious extremes, such, indeed, as our Lord condemned, +and which seem a fair subject for notice amongst Scottish peculiarities. +But the philosophy of the question is curious. Scotland has ever made +her boast of the simplest form of worship, and a worship free from +ceremonial, more even than the Church of England, which is received as, +in doctrine and ritual, the Church of the Reformation. In some respects, +therefore, may you truly say the only standing recognised observance in +the ceremonial part of Presbyterian worship is the Sabbath day--an +observance which has been pushed in times past even beyond the extreme +of a spirit of Judaism, as if the sabbatical ceremonial were made a +substitute for all other ceremony. In this, as well as in other matters +which we have pointed out, what changes have taken place, what changes +are going on! It may be difficult to assign precise causes for such +changes having taken place among us, and that during the lifetime of +individuals now living to remember them. It has been a period for many +changes in manners, habits, and forms of language, such as we have +endeavoured to mark in this volume. The fact of such changes is +indisputable, and sometimes it is difficult not only to assign the +causes for them, but even to describe in what the changes themselves +consist. They are gradual, and almost imperceptible. Scottish people +lose their Scotchness; they leave home, and return without those +expressions and intonations, and even peculiarity of voice and manner, +which used to distinguish us from Southern neighbours. In all this, I +fear, we lose our originality. It has not passed away, but with every +generation becomes less like the real type. + +I would introduce here a specimen of the precise sort of changes to +which I would refer, as an example of the reminiscences intended to be +introduced into these pages. We have in earlier editions given an +account of the pains taken by Lord Gardenstone to extend and improve his +rising village of Laurencekirk; amongst other devices he had brought +down, as settlers, a variety of artificers and workmen from England. +With these he had introduced a _hatter_ from Newcastle; but on taking +him to church next day after his arrival, the poor man saw that he might +decamp without loss of time, as he could not expect much success in his +calling at Laurencekirk; in fact, he found Lord Gardenstone's and his +own the only hats in the kirk--the men all wore then the flat Lowland +bonnet. But how quickly times change! My excellent friend, Mr. Gibbon +of Johnstone, Lord Gardenstone's own place, which is near Laurencekirk, +tells me that at the present time _one_ solitary Lowland bonnet lingers +in the parish. + +Hats are said to have been first brought into Inverness by Duncan Forbes +of Culloden, the Lord President, who died in 1747. Forbes is reported to +have presented the provost and bailies with cocked hats, which they wore +only on Sundays and council days. About 1760 a certain Deacon Young +began daily to wear a hat, and the country people crowding round him, +the Deacon used humorously to say, "What do you see about me, sirs? am I +not a mortal man like yourselves?" The broad blue bonnets I speak of +long continued to be worn in the Highland capital, and are still +occasionally to be seen there, though generally superseded by the +Glengarry bonnet and ordinary hat. It is a minor change, but a very +decided one. + +The changes which have taken place, and which give rise to such +"Reminiscences," are very numerous, and meet us at every turn in +society. Take, for example, the case of our Highland chieftains. We may +still retain the appellation, and talk of the chiefs of Clanranald, of +Glengarry, etc. But how different is a chieftain of the present day, +even from some of those of whom Sir Walter Scott wrote as existing so +late as 1715 or 1745! Dr. Gregory (of immortal _mixture_ memory) used to +tell a story of an old Highland chieftain, intended to show how such +Celtic potentates were, even in his day, still inclined to hold +themselves superior to all the usual considerations which affected +ordinary mortals. The doctor, after due examination, had, in his usual +decided and blunt manner, pronounced the liver of a Highlander to be at +fault, and to be the cause of his ill-health. His patient, who could not +but consider this as taking a great liberty with a Highland chieftain, +roared out--"And what the devil is it to you whether I have a liver or +not?" But there is the case of dignity in Lowland Lairds as well as +clan-headship in Highland Chiefs. In proof of this, I need only point to +a practice still lingering amongst us of calling landed proprietors, not +as Mr. So-and-so, but by the names of their estates. I recollect, in my +early days, a number of our proprietors were always so designated. Thus, +it was not as Mr. Carnegie, Mr. Douglas, Mr. Irvine, etc., but as +Craigo, Tillwhilly, Drum, etc. + +An amusing application of such a territorial denominative system to the +locality of London was narrated to me by a friend who witnessed it. A +Scottish gentleman, who had never been in the metropolis, arrived fresh +from the Highlands, and met a small party at the house of a London +friend. A person was present of most agreeable manners, who delighted +the Scotsman exceedingly. He heard the company frequently referring to +this gentleman's residence in Piccadilly, to his house in Piccadilly, +and so on. When addressed by the gentleman, he commenced his reply, +anxious to pay him all due respect--"Indeed, Piccadilly," etc. He +supposed Piccadilly must be his own territorial locality. Another +instance of mistake, arising out of Scottish ignorance of London ways, +was made by a North Briton on his first visit to the great city. He +arrived at a hotel in Fleet Street, where many of the country coaches +then put up. On the following morning he supposed that such a crowd as +he encountered could only proceed from some "occasion," and must pass +off in due time. Accordingly, a friend from Scotland found him standing +in a doorway, as if waiting for some one. His countryman asked him what +made him stand there. To which he answered--"Ou, I was just stan'ing +till the kirk had scaled." The ordinary appearance of his native borough +made the crowd of Fleet Street suggest to him the idea of a church crowd +passing out to their several homes, called in Scotland a "kirk scaling." +A London street object called forth a similar simple remark from a +Scotsman. He had come to London on his way to India, and for a few days +had time to amuse himself by sight-seeing before his departure. He had +been much struck with the appearance of the mounted sentinels at the +Horse Guards, Whitehall, and bore them in remembrance during his Eastern +sojourn. On his return, after a period of thirty years, on passing the +Horse Guards, he looked up to one, and seeing him, as he thought, +unchanged as to horse, position, and accoutrements, he exclaimed--"Od, +freend, ye hae had a lang spell on't sin' I left," supposing him to be +the identical sentinel he had seen before he sailed. + +It is interesting to preserve national peculiarities which are thus +passing away from us. One great pleasure I have had in their collection, +and that is the numerous and sympathetic communications I have received +from Scotsmen, I may literally say from Scotsmen _in all quarters of the +world_; sometimes communicating very good examples of Scottish humour, +and always expressing their great pleasure in reading, when in distant +lands and foreign scenes, anecdotes which reminded them of Scotland, and +of their ain days of "auld langsyne." + +There is no mistaking the national attachment so strong in the Scottish +character. Men return after long absence, in this respect, unchanged; +whilst absent, Scotsmen _never_ forget their Scottish home. In all +varieties of lands and climates their hearts ever turn towards the "land +o' cakes and brither Scots." Scottish festivals are kept with Scottish +feeling on "Greenland's icy mountains" or "India's coral strand." I +received an amusing account of an ebullition of this patriotic feeling +from my late noble friend the Marquis of Lothian, who met with it when +travelling in India. He happened to arrive at a station upon the eve of +St. Andrew's Day, and received an invitation to join a Scottish dinner +party in commemoration of old Scotland. There was a great deal of +Scottish enthusiasm. There were _seven_ sheep-heads (singed) down the +table; and Lord Lothian told me that after dinner he sang with great +applause "The Laird o' Cockpen." + +Another anecdote arising out of Scotsmen meeting in distant lands, is +rather of a more serious character, and used to be told with exquisite +humour by the late lamented Dr. Norman Macleod. A settler in Australia, +who for a long time had heard nothing of his Scottish kith and kin, was +delighted at the arrival of a countryman direct from his own part of the +country. When he met with him, the following conversation took place +between them:--_Q_. "Ye ken my fouk, friend; can ye tell me gin my +faather's alive?" _A_.--"Hout, na; he's deed." _Q_.--"Deed! What did he +dee o'? was it fever?" _A_.--"Na, it wasna fever." _Q_.--"Was it +cholera?" _A_.--"Na." The question being pressed, the stranger drily +said, "Sheep," and then he accompanied the ominous word by delicately +and significantly pointing to the jugular under his ear. The man had +been hanged for sheep-stealing! + +It must always be amusing for Scotsmen to meet in distant lands, and +there to play off on each other the same dry, quaint humour which +delighted them in their native land, and in their early days at home. An +illustration of this remark has been communicated by a kind +correspondent at Glasgow. Mrs. Hume, a true Scot, sends me the following +dialogue, accompanied by a very clever etching of the parties, from the +Melbourne _Punch_, August 17, 1871, headed "Too Poor,--_Night of +Waverley Concert_." + +_Southron_.--You here, Mac! you ought to have been at the concert, you +know. Aren't you one of the 'Scots wha hae?' + +_Mac_.--Indeed no. I'm are o' the Scots wha hae na, or I wadna be here +the nicht. + +He would not have stayed at home if he had been one of the "Scots wha +hae." + +I am assured that the genuineness of the following anecdote is +unquestionable, as my informant received it from the person to whom it +occurred. A popular Anglican Nonconformist minister was residing with a +family in Glasgow while on a visit to that city, whither he had gone on +a deputation from the Wesleyan Missionary Society. After dinner, in +reply to an invitation to partake of some fine fruit, he mentioned to +the family a curious circumstance concerning himself--viz. that he had +never in his life tasted an apple, pear, grape, or indeed any kind of +green fruit. This fact seemed to evoke considerable surprise from the +company, but a cautious Scotsman, of a practical, matter-of-fact turn of +mind, who had listened with much unconcern, drily remarked, "It's a +peety but ye had been in Paradise, and there micht na hae been ony faa." +I have spoken elsewhere of the cool matter-of-fact manner in which the +awful questions connected with the funerals of friends are often +approached by Scottish people, without the least intention or purpose of +being irreverent or unfeeling. By the kindness of Mr. Lyon, I am enabled +to give an authentic anecdote of a curious character, illustrative of +this habit of mind, and I cannot do better than give it in his own +words:--"An old tenant of my late father, George Lyon of Wester Ogil, +many years ago, when on his deathbed, and his end near at hand, his wife +thus addressed him: 'Willie, Willie, as lang as ye can speak, tell us +are ye for your burial-baps round or _square_?' Willie having responded +to this inquiry, was next asked if the _murners_ were to have _glooes_ +(gloves) or mittens, the former being articles with fingers, the latter +having only a thumb-piece; and Willie, having also answered this +question, was allowed to depart in peace." + +There could not be a better example of this familiar handling, without +meaning offence, than one which has just been sent to me by a kind +correspondent. I give her own words. "Happening to call on a poor +neighbour, I asked after the children of a person who lived close by." +She replied, "They're no hame yet; gaed awa to the English kirk to get +_a clap_ o' _the heid_. It was the day of _confirmation_ for St. Paul's. +This definition of the 'outward and visible sign' would look rather odd +in the catechism. But the poor woman said it from no disrespect; it was +merely her way of answering my question." But remarks on serious +subjects often go to deeper views of religious matters than might be +expected from the position of the parties and the terms made use of. + +Of the wise and shrewd judgment of the Scottish character, as bearing +upon religious pretensions, I have an apt example from my friend Dr. +Norman Macleod. During one of the late revivals in Scotland, a small +farmer went about preaching with much fluency and zeal the doctrine of a +"full assurance" of faith, and expressed his belief of it for himself in +such extravagant terms as few men would venture upon who were humble and +cautious against presumption. The "preacher," being personally rather +remarkable as a man of greedy and selfish views in life, excited some +suspicion in the breast of an old sagacious countryman, a neighbour of +Dr. Macleod, who asked him what _he_ thought of John as a preacher, and +of his doctrine. Scratching his head, as if in some doubt, he replied, +"I'm no verra sure o' Jock. I never ken't a man _sae sure o' Heaven, and +sae sweert to be gaing tae't_." He showed his sagacity, for John was +soon after in prison for theft. + +Another story gives a good idea of the Scottish matter-of-fact view of +things being brought to bear upon a religious question without meaning +to be profane or irreverent. Dr. Macleod was on a Highland loch when a +storm came on which threatened serious consequences. The doctor, a large +powerful man, was accompanied by a clerical friend of diminutive size +and small appearance, who began to speak seriously to the boatmen of +their danger, and proposed that all present should join in prayer. "Na, +na," said the chief boatman; "let the _little_ ane gang to pray, but +first the big ane maun tak an oar." Illustrative of the same spirit was +the reply of a Scotsman of the genuine old school, "Boatie" of Deeside, +of whom I have more to say, to a relative of mine. He had been nearly +lost in a squall, and saved after great exertion, and was told by my +aunt that he should be grateful to providence for his safety. The man, +not meaning to be at all ungrateful, but viewing his preservation in +the purely hard matter-of-fact light, quietly answered, "Weel, weel, +Mrs. Russell; Providence here or Providence there, an I hadna worked +sair mysell I had been drouned." + +Old Mr. Downie, the parish minister of Banchory, was noted, in my +earliest days, for his quiet pithy remarks on men and things, as they +came before him. His reply to his son, of whose social position he had +no very exalted opinion, was of this class. Young Downie had come to +visit his father from the West Indies, and told him that on his return +he was to be married to a lady whose high qualities and position he +spoke of in extravagant terms. He assured his father that she was "quite +young, was very rich, and very beautiful." "Aweel, Jemmy," said the old +man, very quietly and very slily, "I'm thinking there maun be some +_faut_." Of the dry sarcasm we have a good example in the quiet +utterance of a good Scottish phrase by an elder of a Free Kirk lately +formed. The minister was an eloquent man, and had attracted one of the +town-council, who, it was known, hardly ever entered the door of a +church, and now came on motives of curiosity. He was talking very grand +to some of the congregation: "Upon my word, your minister is a very +eloquent man. Indeed, he will quite convert me." One of the elders, +taking the word in a higher sense than the speaker intended, quietly +replied, "Indeed, Bailie, there's _muckle need_." + +A kind correspondent sends me an illustration of this quaint +matter-of-fact view of a question as affecting the sentiments or the +feelings. He tells me he knew an old lady who was a stout large woman, +and who with this state of body had many ailments, which she bore +cheerfully and patiently. When asked one day by a friend, "How she was +keeping," she replied, "Ou, just middling; there's _ower muckle o' me_ +to be a' weel at ae time." No Englishwoman would have given such an +answer. The same class of character is very strongly marked in a story +which was told by Mr. Thomas Constable, who has a keen appreciation of a +good Scottish story, and tells it inimitably. He used to visit an old +lady who was much attenuated by long illness, and on going up stairs one +tremendously hot afternoon, the daughter was driving away the flies, +which were very troublesome, and was saying, "Thae flies will eat up a' +that remains o' my puir mither." The old lady opened her eyes, and the +last words she spoke were, "What's left o' me's guid eneuch for them." + +The spirit of caution and wariness by which the Scottish character is +supposed to be distinguished has given rise to many of these national +anecdotes. + +Certainly this cautious spirit thus pervaded the opinions of the +Scottish architect who was called upon to erect a building in England +upon the long-lease system, so common with Anglican proprietors, but +quite new to our Scottish friend. When he found the proposal was to +build upon the tenure of 999 years, he quietly suggested, "Culd ye no +mak it a _thousand_? 999 years'll be slippin' awa'." + +But of all the cautious and careful answers we ever heard of was one +given by a carpenter to an old lady in Glasgow, for whom he was working, +and the anecdote is well authenticated. She had offered him a dram, and +asked him whether he would have it then or wait till his work was +done--"Indeed, mem," he said, "there's been sic a power o' sudden deaths +lately that I'll just tak it now." He would guard against contingency +and secure his dram. + +The following is a good specimen of the same humour:--A minister had +been preaching against covetousness and the love of money, and had +frequently repeated how "love of money was the root of all evil" Two old +bodies walking home from church--one said, "An' wasna the minister +strang upo' the money?" "Nae doubt," said the other, rather +hesitatingly; and added, "ay, but it's grand to hae the wee bit siller +in your haund when ye gang an errand." + +I have still another specimen of this national, cool, and deliberative +view of a question, which seems characteristic of the temperament of our +good countrymen. Some time back, when it was not uncommon for challenges +to be given and accepted for insults, or supposed insults, an English +gentleman was entertaining a party at Inverness with an account of the +wonders he had seen and the deeds he had performed in India, from whence +he had lately arrived. He enlarged particularly upon the size of the +tigers he had met with at different times in his travels, and by way of +corroborating his statements, assured the company that he had shot one +himself considerably above forty feet long. A Scottish gentleman +present, who thought that these narratives rather exceeded a traveller's +allowed privileges, coolly said that no doubt those were very remarkable +tigers; but that he could assure the gentleman there were in that +northern part of the country some wonderful animals, and, as an example, +he cited the existence of a skate-fish captured off Thurso, which +exceeded half-an-acre in extent. The Englishman saw this was intended as +a sarcasm against his own story, so he left the room in indignation, and +sent his friend, according to the old plan, to demand satisfaction or an +apology from the gentleman, who had, he thought, insulted him. The +narrator of the skate story coolly replied, "Weel, sir, gin yer freend +will tak' a few feet aff the length o' his tiger, we'll see what can be +dune about the breadth o' the skate." He was too cautious to commit +himself to a rash or decided course of conduct. When the tiger was +shortened, he would take into consideration a reduction of superficial +area in his skate. + +A kind correspondent has sent me about as good a specimen of dry +Scottish quiet humour as I know. A certain Aberdeenshire laird, who kept +a very good poultry-yard, could not command a fresh egg for his +breakfast, and felt much aggrieved by the want. One day, however, he met +his grieve's wife with a nice basket, and very suspiciously going +towards the market; on passing and speaking a word, he was enabled to +discover that her basket was full of beautiful white eggs. Next time he +talked with his grieve, he said to him, "James, I like you very well, +and I think you serve me faithfully, but I cannot say I admire your +wife." To which the cool reply was, "Oh, 'deed, sir, I'm no surprised at +that, for I dinna muckle admire her mysel'." + +An answer very much resembling this, and as much to the point, was that +of a gudewife on Deeside, whose daughter had just been married and had +left her for her new home. A lady asked the mother very kindly about her +daughter, and said she hoped she liked her new home and new relations. +"Ou, my lady, she likes the parish weel eneuch, but she doesna think +muckle o' her _man_!" + +The natives of Aberdeenshire are distinguished for the two qualities of +being very acute in their remarks and very peculiar in their language. +Any one may still gain a thorough knowledge of Aberdeen dialect and see +capital examples of Aberdeen humour. I have been supplied with a +remarkable example of this combination of Aberdeen shrewdness with +Aberdeen dialect. In the course of the week after the Sunday on which +several elders of an Aberdeen parish had been set apart for parochial +offices, a knot of the parishioners had assembled at what was in all +parishes a great place of resort for idle gossiping--the smiddy or +blacksmith's workshop. The qualifications of the new elders were +severely criticised. One of the speakers emphatically laid down that the +minister should not have been satisfied, and had in fact made a most +unfortunate choice. He was thus answered by another parish +oracle--perhaps the schoolmaster, perhaps a weaver:--"Fat better culd +the man dee nir he's dune?--he bud tae big's dyke wi' the feal at fit +o't." He meant there was no choice of material--he could only take +what offered. + +By the kindness of Dr. Begg, I have a most amusing anecdote to +illustrate how deeply long-tried associations were mixed up with the +habits of life in the older generation. A junior minister having to +assist at a church in a remote part of Aberdeenshire, the parochial +minister (one of the old school) promised his young friend a good glass +of whisky-toddy after all was over, adding slily and very significantly, +"and gude _smuggled_ whusky." His Southron guest thought it incumbent to +say, "Ah, minister, that's wrong, is it not? you know it is contrary to +Act of Parliament." The old Aberdonian could not so easily give up his +fine whisky to what he considered an unjust interference; so he quietly +said, "Oh, Acts o' Parliament lose their breath before they get to +Aberdeenshire." + +There is something very amusing in the idea of what may be called the +"fitness of things," in regard to snuff-taking, which occurred to an +honest Highlander, a genuine lover of sneeshin. At the door of the +Blair-Athole Hotel he observed standing a magnificent man in full +tartans, and noticed with much admiration the wide dimensions of his +nostrils in a fine upturned nose. He accosted him, and, as his most +complimentary act, offered him his mull for a pinch. The stranger drew +up, and rather haughtily said: "I never take snuff." "Oh," said the +other, "that's a peety, for there's grand _accommodation_[15]!" + +I don't know a better example of the sly sarcasm than the following +answer of a Scottish servant to the violent command of his enraged +master. A well-known coarse and abusive Scottish law functionary, when +driving out of his grounds, was shaken by his carriage coming in contact +with a large stone at the gate. He was very angry, and ordered the +gatekeeper to have it removed before his return. On driving home, +however, he encountered another severe shock by the wheels coming in +contact with the very same stone, which remained in the very same place. +Still more irritated than before, in his usual coarse language he called +the gatekeeper, and roared out: "You rascal, if you don't send that +beastly stone to h---, I'll break your head." "Well," said the man +quietly, and as if he had received an order which he had to execute, and +without meaning anything irreverent, "aiblins gin it were sent to heevan +_it wad be mair out o' your Lordship's way_." + +I think about as cool a Scottish "aside" as I know, was that of the old +dealer who, when exhorting his son to practise honesty in his dealings, +on the ground of its being the "best policy," quietly added, "I _hae +tried baith_" + +In this work frequent mention is made of a class of old _ladies_, +generally residing in small towns, who retained till within the memory +of many now living the special characteristics I have referred to. Owing +to local connection, I have brought forward those chiefly who lived in +Montrose and the neighbourhood. But the race is extinct; you might as +well look for hoops and farthingales in society as for such characters +now. You can scarcely imagine an old lady, however quaint, now making +use of some of the expressions recorded in the text, or saying, for the +purpose of breaking up a party of which she was tired, from holding bad +cards, "We'll stop now, bairns; I'm no enterteened;" or urging more +haste in going to church on the plea, "Come awa, or I'll be ower late +for the 'wicked man'"--her mode of expressing the commencement of +the service. + +Nothing could better illustrate the quiet pawky style for which our +countrymen have been distinguished, than the old story of the piper and +the wolves. A Scottish piper was passing through a deep forest. In the +evening he sat down to take his supper. He had hardly begun, when a +number of hungry wolves, prowling about for food, collected round him. +In self-defence, the poor man began to throw pieces of his victuals to +them, which they greedily devoured. When he had disposed of all, in a +fit of despair he took his pipes and began to play. The unusual sound +terrified the wolves, which, one and all, took to their heels and +scampered off in every direction: on observing which, Sandy quietly +remarked, "Od, an I'd kenned ye liket the pipes sae weel, I'd a gien ye +a spring _afore_ supper." + +This imperturbable mode of looking at the events of life is illustrated +by perhaps the _most_ cautious answer on record, of the Scotsman who, +being asked if he could play the fiddle, warily answered, "He couldna +say, for he had never tried." But take other cases. For example: One +tremendously hot day, during the old stage-coach system, I was going +down to Portobello, when the coachman drew up to take in a gentleman who +had hailed him on the road. He was evidently an Englishman--a fat man, +and in a perfect state of "thaw and dissolution" from the heat and dust. +He wiped himself, and exclaimed, as a remark addressed to the company +generally, "D----d hot it is." No one said anything for a time, till a +man in the corner slily remarked, "I dinna doubt, sir, but it may." The +cautiousness against committing himself unreservedly to any proposition, +however plausible, was quite delicious. + +A more determined objection to giving a categorical answer occurred, as +I have been assured, in regard to a more profound question. A party +travelling on a railway got into deep discussion on theological +questions. Like Milton's spirits in Pandemonium, they had + + "Reason'd high + Of providence, fore-knowledge, will, and fate-- + Fix'd fate, free-will, fore-knowledge absolute; + And found no end, in wand'ring mazes lost." + +A plain Scotsman present seemed much interested in these matters, and +having expressed himself as not satisfied with the explanations which +had been elicited in the course of discussion on a particular point +regarding predestination, one of the party said to him that he had +observed a minister, whom they all knew, in the adjoining compartment, +and that when the train stopped at the next station a few minutes, he +could go and ask _his_ opinion. The good man accordingly availed himself +of the opportunity to get hold of the minister, and lay their difficulty +before him. He returned in time to resume his own place, and when they +had started again, the gentleman who had advised him, finding him not +much disposed to voluntary communication, asked if he had seen the +minister. "O ay," he said, "he had seen him." "And did you propose the +question to him?" "O ay." "And what did he say?" "Oh, he just said he +didna ken; and what was mair he didna _care!_" + +I have received the four following admirable anecdotes, illustrative of +dry Scottish pawky humour, from an esteemed minister of the Scottish +Church, the Rev. W. Mearns of Kinneff. I now record them nearly in the +same words as his own kind communication. The anecdotes are as +follow:--An aged minister of the old school, Mr. Patrick Stewart, one +Sunday took to the pulpit a sermon without observing that the first leaf +or two were so worn and eaten away that he couldn't decipher or announce +the text. He was not a man, however, to be embarrassed or taken aback by +a matter of this sort, but at once intimated the state of matters to the +congregation,--"My brethren, I canna tell ye the text, for the mice hae +eaten it; but we'll just begin whaur the mice left aff, and when I come +to it I'll let you ken." + +In the year 1843, shortly after the Disruption, a parish minister had +left the manse and removed to about a mile's distance. His pony got +loose one day, and galloped down the road in the direction of the old +glebe. The minister's man in charge ran after the pony in a great fuss, +and when passing a large farm-steading on the way, cried out to the +farmer, who was sauntering about, but did not know what had taken +place--"Oh, sir, did _ye_ see the minister's shault?" "No, no," was the +answer,--"but what's happened?" "Ou, sir, fat do ye think? the +minister's shault's _got lowse_ frae his tether, an' I'm frichtened he's +ta'en the road doun to the auld glebe." "Weel-a-wicht!"--was the shrewd +clever rejoinder of the farmer, who was a keen supporter of the old +parish church, "I wad _na_ wonder at _that_. An' I'se warrant, gin the +minister was gettin' _lowse_ frae _his_ tether, he wad jist tak the +same road." + +An old clerical friend upon Speyside, a confirmed bachelor, on going up +to the pulpit one Sunday to preach, found, after giving out the psalm, +that he had forgotten his sermon. I do not know what his objections were +to his leaving the pulpit, and going to the manse for his sermon, but he +preferred sending his old confidential housekeeper for it. He +accordingly stood up in the pulpit, stopped the singing which had +commenced, and thus accosted his faithful domestic:--"Annie; I say, +Annie, _we've_ committed a mistak the day. Ye maun jist gang your waa's +hame, and ye'll get my sermon oot o' my breek-pouch, an' we'll sing to +the praise o' the Lord till ye come back again." Annie, of course, at +once executed her important mission, and brought the sermon out of "the +breek-pouch," and the service, so far as we heard, was completed without +further interruption. + +My dear friend, the late Rev. Dr. John Hunter, told me an anecdote very +characteristic of the unimaginative matter-of-fact Scottish view of +matters. One of the ministers of Edinburgh, a man of dry humour, had a +daughter who had for some time passed the period of youth and of +beauty. She had become an Episcopalian, an event which the Doctor +accepted with much good-nature, and he was asking her one day if she did +not intend to be confirmed. "Well," she said, "I don't know. I +understand Mr. Craig always kisses the candidates whom he prepares, and +I could not stand that." "Indeed, Jeanie," said the Doctor slily, "gin +Edward Craig _were_ to gie ye a kiss, I dinna think ye would be muckle +the waur." + +Many anecdotes characteristic of the Scottish peasant often turn upon +words and ideas connected with Holy Scripture. This is not to be +considered as in any sense profane or irreverent; but it arises from the +Bible being to the peasantry of an older generation their library--their +only book. We have constant indications of this almost exclusive +familiarity with Scripture ideas. At the late ceremonial in the north, +when the Archbishop of Canterbury laid the foundation of a Bishop's +Church at Inverness, a number of persons, amid the general interest and +kindly feeling displayed by the inhabitants, were viewing the procession +from a hill as it passed along. When the clergy, to the number of sixty, +came on, an old woman, who was watching the whole scene with some +jealousy, exclaimed, at sight of the surplices, "There they go, the +_whited_ sepulchres!" I received another anecdote illustrative of the +same remark from an esteemed minister of the Free Church: I mean of the +hold which Scripture expressions have upon the minds of our Scottish +peasantry. One of his flock was a sick nervous woman, who hardly ever +left the house. But one fine afternoon, when she was left alone, she +fancied she would like to get a little air in the field adjoining the +house. Accordingly she put on a bonnet and wrapped herself in a huge +red shawl. Creeping along the dyke-side, some cattle were attracted +towards her, and first one and then another gathered round, and she took +shelter in the ditch till she was relieved by some one coming up to her +rescue. She afterwards described her feelings to her minister in strong +language, adding, "And eh, sir! when I lay by the dyke, and the beasts +round a' glowerin' at me, I thocht what Dauvid maun hae felt when he +said--'Many bulls have compassed me; strong bulls of Bashan have beset +me round.'" + +With the plainness and pungency of the old-fashioned Scottish language +there was sometimes a coarseness of expression, which, although commonly +repeated in the Scottish drawing-room of last century, could not now be +tolerated. An example of a very plain and downright address of a laird +has been recorded in the annals of "Forfarshire Lairdship." He had +married one of the Misses Guthrie, who had a strong feeling towards the +Presbyterian faith in which she had been brought up, although her +husband was one of the zealous old school of Episcopalians. The young +wife had invited her old friend, the parish minister, to tea, and had +given him a splendid "_four hours."_ Ere the table was cleared the laird +came in unexpectedly, and thus expressed his indignation, not very +delicately, at what he considered an unwarrantable exercise of +hospitality at his cost:--"Helen Guthrie, ye'll no think to save yer ain +saul at the expense of my meal-girnel!" + +The answer of an old woman under examination by the minister to the +question from the Shorter Catechism--"What are the _decrees_ of God?" +could not have been surpassed by the General Assembly of the Kirk, or +even the Synod of Dort--"Indeed, sir, He kens that best Himsell." We +have an answer analogous to that, though not so pungent, in a catechumen +of the late Dr. Johnston of Leith. She answered his own question, +patting him on the shoulder--"'Deed, just tell it yersell, _bonny_ +doctor (he was a very handsome man); naebody can tell it better." + +To pass from the answers of "persons come to years of discretion"--I +have elsewhere given examples of peculiar traits of character set forth +in the answers of mere _children_, and no doubt a most amusing +collection might be made of very juvenile "Scottish Reminiscences." One +of these is now a very old story, and has long been current amongst +us:--A little boy who attended a day-school in the neighbourhood, when +he came home in the evening was always asked how he stood in his own +class. The invariable answer made was, "I'm second dux," which means in +Scottish academical language second from the top of the class. As his +habits of application at home did not quite bear out the claim to so +distinguished a position at school, one of the family ventured to ask +what was the number in the class to which he was attached. After some +hesitation he was obliged to admit: "Ou, there's jist me and _anither_ +lass." It was a very _practical_ answer of the little girl, when asked +the meaning of "darkness," as it occurred in Scripture reading--"Ou, +just steek your een." On the question, What was the "pestilence that +walketh in darkness"? being put to a class, a little boy answered, after +consideration--"Ou, it's just _bugs_." I did not anticipate when in a +former edition I introduced this answer, which I received from my nephew +Sir Alexander Ramsay, that it would call forth a comment so interesting +as one which I have received from Dr. Barber of Ulverston. He sends me +an extract from Matthew's _Translation of the Bible_, which he received +from Rev. L.R. Ayre, who possesses a copy of date 1553, from which it +appears that Psalm xci. 5 was thus translated by Matthew, who adopted +his translation from Coverdale and Tyndale:--"So that thou shalt not +need to be afrayed for any bugge by nyght, nor for the arrow that flyeth +by day[16]." Dr. Barber ingeniously remarks--"Is it possible the little +boy's mother had one of these old Bibles, or is it merely a +coincidence?" + +The innocent and unsophisticated answers of children on serious subjects +are often very amusing. Many examples are recorded, and one I have +received seems much to the point, and derives a good deal of its point +from the Scottish turn of the expressions. An elder of the kirk having +found a little boy and his sister playing marbles on Sunday, put his +reproof in this form, not a judicious one for a child:--"Boy, do ye know +where children go to who play marbles on Sabbath-day?" "Ay," said the +boy, "they gang doun' to the field by the water below the brig." "No," +roared out the elder, "they go to hell, and are burned." The little +fellow, really shocked, called to his sister, "Come awa', Jeanie, here's +a man swearing awfully." + +A Scotch story like that of the little boy, of which the humour +consisted in the dry application of the terms in a sense different from +what was intended by the speaker, was sent to me, but has got spoilt by +passing through the press. It must be Scotch, or at least, is composed +of Scottish materials--the Shorter Catechism and the bagpipes. A piper +was plying his trade in the streets, and a strict elder of the kirk, +desirous to remind him that it was a somewhat idle and profitless +occupation, went up to him and proposed solemnly the first question of +the Shorter Catechism, "What is the chief end of man?" The good piper, +thinking only of his own business, and supposing that the question had +reference to some pipe melody, innocently answered, "Na, I dinna ken the +tune, but if ye'll whistle it I'll try and play it for ye." + +I have said before, and I would repeat the remark again and again, that +the object of this work is _not_ to string together mere funny stories, +or to collect amusing anecdotes. We have seen such collections, in which +many of the anecdotes are mere Joe Millers translated into Scotch. The +purport of these pages has been throughout to illustrate Scottish life +and character, by bringing forward those modes and forms of expression +by which alone our national peculiarities can be familiarly illustrated +and explained. Besides Scottish replies and expressions which are most +characteristic--and in fact unique for dry humour, for quaint and +exquisite wit--I have often referred to a consideration of dialect and +proverbs. There can be no doubt there is a force and beauty in our +Scottish _phraseology_, as well as a quaint humour, considered merely +_as_ phraseology, peculiar to itself. I have spoken of the phrase "Auld +langsyne," and of other words, which may be compared in their Anglican +and Scottish form. Take the familiar term common to many singing-birds. +The English word linnet does not, to my mind, convey so much of simple +beauty and of pastoral ideas as belong to our Scottish word LINTIE. + +I recollect hearing the Rev. Dr. Norman Macleod give a most interesting +account of his visit to Canada. In the course of his eloquent narrative +he mentioned a conversation he had with a Scottish emigrant, who in +general terms spoke favourably and gratefully of his position in his +adopted country. But he could not help making this exception when he +thought of the "banks and braes o' bonny Doon"--"But oh, sir," he said, +"there are nae _linties_ i' the wuds." How touching the words in his own +dialect! The North American woods, although full of birds of beautiful +plumage, it is well known have no singing-birds. + +A worthy Scottish Episcopal minister one day met a townsman, a breeder +and dealer in singing-birds. The man told him he had just had a child +born in his family, and asked him if he would baptize it. He thought the +minister could not resist the offer of a bird. "Eh, Maister Shaw," he +said, "if ye'll jist do it, I hae a fine lintie the noo, and if ye'll do +it, I'll gie ye the lintie." He quite thought that this would settle +the matter! + +By these remarks I mean to express the feeling that the word _lintie_ +conveys to my mind more of tenderness and endearment towards the little +songster than linnet. And this leads me to a remark (which I do not +remember to have met with) that Scottish dialects are peculiarly rich in +such terms of endearment, more so than the pure Anglican. Without at all +pretending to exhaust the subject, I may cite the following as examples +of the class of terms I speak of. Take the names for parents--"Daddie" +and "Minnie;" names for children, "My wee bit lady" or "laddie," "My wee +bit lamb;" of a general nature, "My ain kind dearie." "Dawtie," +especially used to young people, described by Jamieson a darling or +favourite, one who is _dawted_--_i.e._ fondled or caressed. My "joe" +expresses affection with familiarity, evidently derived from _joy_, an +easy transition--as "My joe, Janet;" "John Anderson, my joe, John." Of +this character is Burns's address to a wife, "My winsome"--_i.e._ +charming, engaging--"wee thing;" also to a wife, "My winsome +marrow"--the latter word signifying a dear companion, one of a pair +closely allied to each other; also the address of Rob the Ranter to +Maggie Lauder, "My bonnie bird." Now, we would remark, upon this +abundant nomenclature of kindly expressions in the Scottish dialect, +that it assumes an interesting position as taken in connection with the +Scottish Life and _Character_, and as a set-off against a frequent short +and _grumpy_ manner. It indicates how often there must be a current of +tenderness and affection in the Scottish heart, which is so frequently +represented to be, like its climate, "stern and wild." There could not +be such _terms_ were the feelings they express unknown. I believe it +often happens that in the Scottish character there is a vein of deep and +kindly feeling lying hid under a short, and hard and somewhat stern +manner. Hence has arisen the Scottish saying which is applicable to such +cases--"His girn's waur than his bite:" his disposition is of a softer +nature than his words and manner would often lead you to suppose. + +There are two admirable articles in _Blackwood's Magazine,_ in the +numbers for November and December 1870, upon this subject. The writer +abundantly vindicates the point and humour of the Scottish tongue. Who +can resist, for example, the epithet applied by Meg Merrilies to an +unsuccessful probationer for admission to the ministry:--"a sticket +stibbler"? Take the sufficiency of Holy Scripture as a pledge for any +one's salvation:--"There's eneuch between the brods o' the Testament to +save the biggest sinner i' the warld." I heard an old Scottish +Episcopalian thus pithily describe the hasty and irreverent manner of a +young Englishman:--"He ribbled aff the prayers like a man at the heid o' +a regiment." A large family of young children has been termed "a great +sma' family." It was a delicious dry rejoinder to the question--"Are you +Mr. So-and-so?" "It's a' that's o' me" (_i.e._ to be had for him.) I +have heard an old Scottish gentleman direct his servant to mend the fire +by saying, "I think, Dauvid, we wadna be the waur o' some coals." + +There is a pure Scottish term, which I have always thought more +expressive than any English word of ideas connected with manners in +society--I mean the word to blether, or blethering, or blethers. +Jamieson defines it to "talk nonsense." But it expresses far more--it +expresses powerfully, to Scottish people, a person at once shallow, +chattering, conceited, tiresome, voluble. + +There is a delicious servantgirlism, often expressed in an answer given +at the door to an inquirer: "Is your master at home, or mistress?" as +the case may be. The problem is to save the direct falsehood, and yet +evade the visit; so the answer is--"Ay, he or she is at hame; but +he's no _in_" + +The transition from Scottish _expressions_ to Scottish Poetry is easy +and natural. In fact, the most interesting feature now belonging to +Scottish life and social habits is, to a certain extent, becoming with +many a matter of reminiscence of _Poetry in the Scottish dialect_, as +being the most permanent and the most familiar feature of Scottish +characteristics. It is becoming a matter of history, in so far as we +find that it has for some time ceased to be cultivated with much +ardour, or to attract much popularity. In fact, since the time of +Burns, it has been losing its hold on the public mind. It is a +remarkable fact that neither Scott nor Wilson, both admirers of Burns, +both copious writers of poetry themselves, both also so distinguished as +writers of Scottish _prose_, should have written any poetry strictly in +the form of pure Scottish dialect. "Jock o' Hazeldean" I hardly admit to +be an exception. It is not Scottish. If, indeed, Sir Walter wrote the +scrap of the beautiful ballad in the "Antiquary"-- + + "Now haud your tongue, baith wife and carle, + And listen, great and sma', + And I will sing of Glenallan's Earl, + That fought at the red Harlaw"-- + +one cannot but regret that he had not written more of the same. +Campbell, a poet and a Scotsman, has not attempted it. In short, we do +not find poetry in the Scottish dialect at all _kept up_ in Scotland. It +is every year becoming more a matter of research and reminiscence. +Nothing new is added to the old stock, and indeed it is surprising to +see the ignorance and want of interest displayed by many young persons +in this department of literature. How few read the works of Allan +Ramsay, once so popular, and still so full of pastoral imagery! There +are occasionally new editions of the _Gentle Shepherd_, but I suspect +for a limited class of readers. I am assured the boys of the High +School, Academy, etc., do not care even for Burns. As poetry in the +Scottish dialect is thus slipping away from the public Scottish mind, I +thought it very suitable to a work of this character to supply a list of +modern _Scottish dialect writers_. This I am able to provide by the +kindness of our distinguished antiquary, Mr. David Laing--the fulness +and correctness of whose acquirements are only equalled by his +readiness and courtesy in communicating his information to others:-- + +SCOTTISH POETS OF THE LAST CENTURY. + +ALLAN RAMSAY. B. 1686. D. 1757. His _Gentle Shepherd_, completed in +1725, and his _Collected Poems_ in 1721-1728. + +It cannot be said there was any want of successors, however obscure, +following in the same track. Those chiefly deserving of notice were-- + +ALEXANDER Ross of Lochlee. B. 1700. D. 1783. _The Fortunate +Shepherdess_. + +ROBERT FERGUSSON. B. 1750. D. 1774. _Leith Races, Caller Oysters_, etc. + +REV. JOHN SKINNER. B. 1721. D. 1807. _Tullochgorum_. + +ROBERT BURNS. B. 1759. D. 1796. + +ALEXANDER, FOURTH DUKE OF GORDON. B. 1743. D. 1827. _Cauld Kail in +Aberdeen_. + +ALEXANDER WILSON of Paisley, who latterly distinguished himself as an +American ornithologist. B. 1766. D. 1813. _Watty and Meg_. + +HECTOR MACNEILL. B. 1746. D. 1818. _Will and Jean_. + +ROBERT TANNAHILL. B. 1774. D. 1810. _Songs_. + +JAMES HOGG. B. 1772. D. 1835. + +ALLAN CUNNINGHAM. B. 1784. D. 1842. + +To this list we must add the names of Lady Nairne and Lady Anne Lindsay. +To the former we are indebted for "The Land o' the Leal," "The Laird o' +Cockpen," and "The Auld Hoose;" to the latter for "Auld Robin Gray:" +and our wonder is, how those who could write so charmingly should have +written so little. + +I have no intention of discussing the general question of Scottish +poetry--of defending or eulogising, or of apologising for anything +belonging to it. There are songs in broad Scottish dialect of which the +beauty and the power will never be lost. Words of Burns, Allan Ramsay, +and Lady Nairne, must ever speak to hearts that are true to nature. I am +desirous of bringing before my readers at this time the name of a +Scottish poet, which, though in Mr. Laing's list, I fear is become +rather a reminiscence. It is fifty years since his poetical pieces were +published in a collected form. I am desirous of giving a special notice +of a true-hearted Scotsman, and a genuine Scottish poet, under both +characters. I look with a tender regard to the memory of the Rev. JOHN +SKINNER of Langside. He has written little in quantity, but it is all +charming. He was a good Christian minister. He was a man of learning--a +man of liberal and generous feeling. In addition to all this, he has +upon me the claim of having been a Scottish Episcopalian divine, and I +am always rejoiced to see among learned men of our church sympathies +with liberalism, besides what is patristic and theological. John +Skinner's name and family are much mixed up with our church. +'Tullochgorum' was father of Primus John Skinner, and grandfather of +Primus W. Skinner and of the Rev. John Skinner of Forfar. The youngest +brother of Tullochgorum was James Skinner, W.S., who died at ninety-one, +and was grandfather of W. Skinner, W.S., Edinburgh. The Rev. J. Skinner +was born in Birse, a wild part of Aberdeenshire, 1721. His father was +parochial schoolmaster at Gight for nearly fifty years. He worked hard +under the care of his father, who was a good Latin scholar. He gained a +bursary at Aberdeen, where he studied. When he left college he became +schoolmaster at Monymusk, where he wrote some pieces that attracted +attention, and Sir Archibald Grant took him into the house, and allowed +him the full use of a very fine library. He made good use of this +opportunity, and indeed became a fair scholar and theologian. Skinner +had been brought up a Presbyterian, but at Monymusk found reasons for +changing his views. In June 1740 he became tutor to the only son of Mrs. +Sinclair in Shetland. Returning to Aberdeenshire in 1741, he completed +his studies for the ministry, was ordained by Bishop Dunbar, and in 1742 +became pastor of Langside. He worked for this little congregation for +nearly sixty-five years, and they were happy and united under his +pastoral charge. One very interesting incident took place during his +ministry, which bears upon our general question of reminiscences and +changes. John Skinner was in his own person an example of that +persecution for political opinion referred to in Professor Macgregor's +account of the large prayer-book in the library at Panmure. After the +'45, Episcopalians were treated with suspicion and severity. The severe +laws passed against Jacobites were put in force, and poor Skinner fined. + +However, better and more peaceful times came round, and all that John +Skinner had undergone did not sour his temper or make him severe or +misanthropical. As a pastor he seems to have had tact, as well as good +temper, in the management of his flock, if we may judge from the +following anecdote:--Talking with an obstinate self-confident farmer, +when the conversation happened to turn on the subject of the motion of +the earth, the farmer would not be convinced that the earth moved at +all. "Hoot, minister," the man roared out; "d'ye see the earth never +gaes oot o' the pairt, and it maun be that the sun gaes round: we a' ken +he rises i' the east and sets i' the west." Then, as if to silence all +argument, he added triumphantly, "As if the sun didna gae round the +earth, when it is said in Scripture that the Lord commanded the sun to +stand still!" Mr. Skinner, finding it was no use to argue further, +quietly answered, "Ay, it's vera true; the sun was commanded to stand +still, and there he stands still, for Joshua never tauld him to tak the +road again." I have said John Skinner wrote little Scottish poetry, but +what he wrote was rarely good. His prose works extended over three +volumes when they were collected by his son, the Bishop of Aberdeen, but +we have no concern with them. His poetical pieces, by which his name +will never die in Scotland, are the "Reel of Tullochgorum" and the "Ewie +with the Crooked Horn," charming Scottish songs,--one the perfection of +the lively, the other of the pathetic. It is quite enough to say of +"Tullochgorum" (by which the old man is now always designated), what was +said of it by Robert Burns, as "the first of songs," and as the best +Scotch song Scotland ever saw. + +I have brought in the following anecdote, exactly as it appeared in the +_Scotsman_ of October 4, 1859, because it introduces his name. + +"The late Rev. John Skinner, author of 'Annals of Scottish Episcopacy,' +was his grandson. He was first appointed to a charge in Montrose, from +whence he was removed to Banff, and ultimately to Forfar. After he had +left Montrose, it reached his ears that an ill-natured insinuation was +circulating there that he had been induced to leave this town by the +temptation of a better income and of fat pork, which, it would appear, +was plentiful in the locality of his new incumbency. Indignant at such +an aspersion, he wrote a letter, directed to his maligners, vindicating +himself sharply from it, which he showed to his grandfather, John +Skinner of Langside, for his approval. The old gentleman objected to it +as too lengthy, and proposed the following pithy substitute:-- + + "'Had Skinner been of carnal mind, + As strangely ye suppose, + Or had he even been fond of swine, + He'd ne'er have left Montrose.'" + +But there is an anecdote of John Skinner which should endear his memory +to every generous and loving heart. On one occasion he was passing a +small dissenting place of worship at the time when the congregation were +engaged in singing: on passing the door--old-fashioned Scottish +Episcopalian as he was--he reverently took off his hat. His companion +said to him, "What! do you feel so much sympathy with this Anti Burgher +congregation?" "No," said Mr. Skinner, "but I respect and love any of my +fellow-Christians who are engaged in singing to the glory of the Lord +Jesus Christ." Well done, old Tullochgorum! thy name shall be loved and +honoured by every true liberal-minded Scotsman. + +Yes! Mr. Skinner's experience of the goodness of God and of the power of +grace, had led him to the conviction that the earnest song of praise, +that comes from the heart of the sincere believer in Christ, can go up +to Heaven from the humblest earthly house of prayer, and be received +before the throne of grace as acceptably as the high and solemn service +of the lofty cathedral, + + "Where, from the long-drawn aisle and fretted vault, + The pealing anthem swells the note of praise." + +We must firmly believe that, obsolete as the dialect of Scotland may +become, and its words and expressions a matter of tradition and of +reminiscence with many, still there are Scottish lines, and broad +Scottish lines, which can never cease to hold their place in the +affections and the admiration of innumerable hearts whom they have +charmed. Can the choice and popular Scottish verses, endeared to us by +so many kindly associations of the past, and by so many beauties and +poetical graces of their own, ever lose their attractions for a Scottish +heart? The charm of such strains can never die. + +I think one subsidiary cause for permanency in the popularity still +belonging to particular Scottish _songs_ has proceeded from their +association with Scottish _music_. The melodies of Scotland can never +die. In the best of these compositions there is a pathos and a feeling +which must preserve them, however simple in their construction, from +being vulgar or commonplace. Mendelssohn did not disdain taking Scottish +airs as themes for the exercise of his profound science and his +exquisite taste. It must, I think, be admitted that singing of Scottish +songs in the perfection of their style--at once pathetic, graceful, and +characteristic--is not so often met with as to remove all apprehension +that ere long they may become matters only of reminiscence. Many +accomplished musicians often neglect entirely the cultivation of their +native melodies, under the idea of their being inconsistent with the +elegance and science of high-class music. They commit a mistake. When +judiciously and tastefully performed, it is a charming style of music, +and will always give pleasure to the intelligent hearer. I have heard +two young friends, who have attained great skill in scientific and +elaborate compositions, execute the simple song of "Low down in the +Broom," with an effect I shall not easily forget. Who that has heard the +Countess of Essex, when Miss Stephens, sing "Auld Robin Gray," can ever +lose the impression of her heart-touching notes? In the case of "Auld +Robin Gray," the song composed by Lady Anne Lindsay, although very +beautiful in itself, has been, I think, a good deal indebted to the air +for its great and continued popularity. The history of that tender and +appropriate melody is somewhat curious, and not generally known. The +author was _not_ a Scotsman. It was composed by the Rev. Mr. Leves, +rector of Wrington in Somersetshire, either early in this century or +just at the close of the last. Mr. Leves was fond of music, and composed +several songs, but none ever gained any notice except his "Auld Robin +Gray," the popularity of which has been marvellous. I knew the family +when I lived in Somersetshire, and had met them in Bath. Mr. Leves +composed the air for his daughter, Miss Bessy Leves, who was a pretty +girl and a pretty singer. + +I cannot but deeply regret to think that I should in these pages have +any ground for classing Scottish poetry and Scottish airs amongst +"Reminiscences." It is a department of literature where, of course, +there must be _selection_, but I am convinced it will repay a careful +cultivation. I would recommend, as a copious and judicious selection of +Scottish _tunes_, "The Scottish Minstrel," by R.A. Smith (Purdie, +Edinburgh). There are the _words_, also, of a vast number of Scottish +songs, but the account of their _authorship_ is very defective. Then, +again, for the fine Scottish ballads of an older period, we have two +admirable collections--one by Mr. R. Chambers, and one by the late +Professor Aytoun. For Scottish dialect songs of the more modern type, a +copious collection will be found (exclusive of Burns and Allan Earn say) +in small volumes published by David Robertson, Glasgow, at intervals +from 1832 to 1853, under the title of _Whistlebinkie_. + +But there are more than lines of Scottish poetry which may become matter +of reminiscence, and more than Scottish song melodies which may be +forgotten. There are strains of Scottish PSALMODY of which it would be +more sad to think that _they_ possibly may have lost their charm and +their hold with Scottish people. That such psalmody, of a peculiar +Scottish class and character, _has_ existed, no one can doubt who has +knowledge or recollection of past days. In glens and retired passes, +where those who fled from persecution met together--on the moors and +heaths, where men suffering for their faith took refuge--in the humble +worship of the cottar's fireside--were airs of sacred Scottish melody, +which were well calculated to fan the heavenward flame which was kindled +in lays of the "sweet Psalmist of Israel." These psalm-tunes are in +their way as peculiar as the song-tunes we have referred to. Nothing can +be more touching than the description by Burns of the domestic psalmody +of his father's cottage. Mr. E. Chambers, in his _Life of Burns_, +informs us that the poet, during his father's infirmity and after his +death, had himself sometimes conducted family worship. Happy days, ere +he had encountered the temptations of a world in which he had too often +fallen before the solicitations of guilty passion! and then, beautifully +does he describe the characteristic features of this portion of the +cottars worship. How solemnly he enumerates the psalm-tunes usually made +use of on such occasions, and discriminates the character of each:-- + + "They chant their artless notes in simple guise; + They tune their hearts, by far the noblest aim: + Perhaps DUNDEE'S wild warbling measures rise, + Or plaintive MARTYRS, worthy of the name, + Or noble ELGIN beets[17] the heavenward flame." + +He was not, alas! always disposed in after life to reverence these +sacred melodies as he had done in his youthful days. In his poem of "The +Holy Fair," he less reverently adduces mention of these sacred airs:-- + + "Now turn the Psalms o' David ower, + And lilt wi' holy clangour. + O' double verse come gie us four, + An' skirl up the Bangor." + +These tunes seem to have been strictly and exclusively national. In +proof of such psalmody being quite national, I have been told that many +of these tunes were composed by artisans, such as builders, joiners, +blacksmiths, etc. + +Several of the psalm-tunes more peculiar to Scotland are no doubt of an +early date. In Ravenscroft's _Psalms_, published with the music in four +parts in 1621, he gives the names of seven as purely Scottish--_King's, +Duke's, Abbey, Dunfermline, Dundee, Glasgow, Martyrs._ I was used to +hear such psalmody in my early days in the parish church of Fettercairn, +where we always attended during summer. It had all the simple +characteristics described by Burns, and there was a heartiness and +energy too in the congregation when, as he expresses it, they used to +"skirl up the Bangor," of which the effects still hang in my +recollection. At that time there prevailed the curious custom, when some +of the psalms were sung, of reading out a single line, and when that was +sung another line was read, and so throughout[18]. Thus, on singing the +50th psalm, the first line sounded thus:--"_Our God shall come, and +shall no more;_" when that was sung, there came the next startling +announcement--"_Be silent, but speak out._" A rather unfortunate +_juxtaposition_ was suggested through this custom, which we are assured +really happened in the church of Irvine. The precentor, after having +given out the first line, and having observed some members of the family +from the castle struggling to get through the crowd on a sacramental +occasion, cried out, "Let the noble family of Eglinton pass," and then +added the line which followed the one he had just given out rather +mal-apropos--"_Nor stand in sinners' way_." One peculiarity I remember, +which was, closing the strain sometimes by an interval less than a +semitone; instead of the half-note preceding the close or key-note, they +used to take the _quarter-note,_ the effect of which had a peculiar +gurgling sound, but I never heard it elsewhere. It may be said these +Scottish tunes were unscientific, and their performance rude. It may be +so, but the effect was striking, as I recall it through the vista of +threescore years and ten. Great advances, no doubt, have been made in +Scotland in congregational psalmody; organs have in some instances been +adopted; choirs have been organised with great effort by choirmasters of +musical taste and skill. But I hope the spirit of PIETY, which in past +times once accompanied the old Scottish psalm, whether sung in the +church or at home, has not departed with the music. Its better emotions +are not, I hope, to become a "Reminiscence." + +There was no doubt sometimes a degree of noise in the psalmody more than +was consistent with good taste, but this often proceeded from the +earnestness of those who joined. I recollect at Banchory an honest +fellow who sang so loud that he annoyed his fellow-worshippers, and the +minister even rebuked him for "skirling" so loud. James was not quite +patient under these hints, and declared to some of his friends that he +was resolved to sing to the praise of God, as he said, "gin I should +crack the waas o' the houss." + +Going from sacred tunes to sacred words, a good many changes have taken +place in the little history of our own psalmody and hymnology. When I +first came to Edinburgh, for psalms we made use of the mild and vapid +new version of Tate and Brady;--for hymns, almost each congregation had +its own selection--and there were hymn-books of Dundee, Perth, Glasgow, +etc. The Established Church used the old rough psalter, with paraphrases +by Logan, etc., and a few hymns added by authority of the General +Assembly. There seems to be a pretty general tendency in the Episcopal +Church to adopt at present the extensive collection called "Hymns +Ancient and Modern," containing 386 pieces. Copies of the words alone +are to be procured for one penny, and the whole, with tunes attached, to +be procured for 1_s_. 6_d_. The Hymns Ancient and Modern are not set +forth with any Ecclesiastical sanction. It is supposed, however, that +there will be a Hymnal published by the Church of England on authority, +and if so, our Church will be likely to adopt it. The Established +Church Hymnal Committee have lately sanctioned a very interesting +collection of 200 pieces. The compilation has been made with liberality +of feeling as well as with good taste. There are several of Neale's +translations from mediaeval hymns, several from John Keble, and the +whole concludes with the Te Deum taken literally from the Prayer-Book. + +This mention of Scottish Psalmody and Scottish Hymnology, whether for +private or for public worship, naturally brings us to a very important +division of our subject; I mean the general question of reminiscences of +Scottish religious feelings and observances; and first in regard to +Scottish clergy. + +My esteemed friend, Lord Neaves, who, it is well known, combines with +his great legal knowledge and high literary acquirements a keen sense of +the humorous, has sometimes pleasantly complained of my drawing so many +of my specimens of Scottish humour from sayings and doings of Scottish +ministers. They were a shrewd and observant race. They lived amongst +their own people from year to year, and understood the Scottish type of +character. Their retired habits and familiar intercourse with their +parishioners gave rise to many quaint and racy communications. They were +excellent men, well suited to their pastoral work, and did much good +amongst their congregations; for it should be always remembered that a +national church requires a sympathy and resemblance between the pastors +and the flocks. Both will be found to change together. Nothing could be +further from my mind in recording these stories, than the idea of +casting ridicule upon such an order of men. My own feelings as a +Scotsman, with all their ancestral associations, lead me to cherish +their memory with pride and deep interest, I may appeal also to the +fact that many contributions to this volume are voluntary offerings from +distinguished clergymen of the Church of Scotland, as well as of the +Free Church and of other Presbyterian communities. Indeed, no persons +enjoy these stories more than ministers themselves. I recollect many +years ago travelling to Perth in the old stage-coach days, and enjoying +the society of a Scottish clergyman, who was a most amusing companion, +and full of stories, the quaint humour of which accorded with his own +disposition. When we had come through Glen Farg, my companion pointed +out that we were in the parish of Dron. With much humour he introduced +an anecdote of a brother minister not of a brilliant order of mind, who +had terminated in this place a course of appointments in the Church, the +names of which, at least, were of an ominous character for a person of +unimaginative temperament. The worthy man had been brought up at the +school of _Dunse_; had been made assistant at _Dull_, a parish near +Aberfeldy, in the Presbytery of Weem; and had here ended his days and +his clerical career as minister of _Dron_. + +There can be no doubt that the older school of national clergy supply +many of our most amusing anecdotes; and our pages would suffer +deplorably were all the anecdotes taken away which turn upon their +peculiarities of dialect and demeanour. I think it will be found, +however, that upon no class of society has there been a greater change +during the last hundred years than on the Scottish clergy as a body. +This, indeed, might, from many circumstances, have been expected. The +improved facilities for locomotion have had effect upon the retirement +and isolation of distant country parishes, the more liberal and extended +course of study at Scottish colleges, the cheaper and wider diffusion +of books on general literature, of magazines, newspapers, and reviews. +Perhaps, too, we may add that candidates for the ministry now more +generally originate from the higher educated classes of society. But +honour to the memory of Scottish ministers of the days that are gone! + +The Scottish clergy, from having mixed so little with life, were often, +no doubt, men of simple habits and of very childlike notions. The +opinions and feelings which they expressed were often of a cast, which, +amongst persons of more experience, would appear to be not always quite +consistent with the clerical character. In them it arose from their +having nothing _conventional_ about them. Thus I have heard of an old +bachelor clergyman whose landlady declared he used to express an opinion +of his dinner by the grace which he made to follow. When he had had a +good dinner which pleased him, and a good glass of beer with it, he +poured forth the grace, "For the riches of thy bounty and its blessings +we offer our thanks." When he had had poor fare and poor beer, his grace +was, "The least of these thy mercies." + +Many examples of the dry, quaint humour of the class occur in these +pages, but there could not be a finer specimen than the instance +recorded in the "Annals of the Parish" of the account given by the +minister of his own ordination. The ministers were all assembled for the +occasion; prayers had been offered, discourses delivered, and the time +for the actual ordination had come. The form is for the candidate to +kneel down and receive his sacred office by the imposition of hands, +_i.e._ the laying on of hands by the whole Presbytery. As the attendance +of ministers was large, a number of hands were stretched forth, more +than could quite conveniently come up to the candidate. An old minister, +of the quiet jocose turn of mind we speak of, finding himself thus kept +at a little distance, stretched out his walking staff and put it on the +young man's head, with the quiet remark, "That will do! Timmer to +timmer"--timber to timber. + +Their style of preaching, too was, no doubt often plain and homely. They +had not the graces of elocution or elegance of diction. But many were +faithful in their office, and preached Christ as the poor man's friend +and the Saviour of the lowly and the suffering. I have known Scottish +ministers of the old school get into a careless indifferent state of +ministration; I have also known the hoary head of many a Scottish +minister go down to the grave a crown of glory, in his day and +generation more honoured than many which had been adorned by a mitre. + +FOOTNOTES: + +[14] Lying Gilbert. + +[15] This anecdote has been illustrated, as taken from these pages, by a +very clever sketch of the Highlander and his admirer, in a curious +publication at Liverpool called _The Tobacco Plant_, and devoted to the +interests of smoking and snuffing. + +[16] The truth is, in old English usage "bug" signifies a spectre or +anything that is frightful. Thus in Henry VI., 3d Part, act v. sc. +ii.--"For Warwick was a _bug_ that feared us all." + +[17] Adds fuel to fire. + +[18] As far as I am aware the only place in which it is practised at +present (July 1872), is in the Free Church, Brodick, Arran. + + + +CHAPTER THE SECOND. + +SCOTTISH RELIGIOUS FEELINGS AND OBSERVANCES. + +Passing from these remarks on the Scottish Clergy of a past day, I would +treat the more extensive subject of RELIGIOUS FEELINGS and RELIGIOUS +OBSERVANCES generally with the caution and deference due to such a +question, and I would distinctly premise that there is in my mind no +intention of entering, in this volume, upon those great questions which +are connected with certain church movements amongst us, or with national +peculiarities of faith and discipline. It is impossible, however, to +overlook entirely the fact of a gradual relaxation, which has gone on +for some years, of the sterner features of the Calvinistic school of +theology--at any rate, of keeping its theoretic peculiarities more in +the background. What we have to notice in these pages are changes in the +feelings with regard to religion and religious observances, which have +appeared upon the _exterior_ of society--the changes which belong to +outward habits rather than to internal feelings. Of such changes many +have taken place within my own experience. Scotland has ever borne the +character of a moral and religious country; and the mass of the people +are a more church-going race than the masses of English population. I am +not at all prepared to say that in the middle and lower ranks of life +our countrymen have undergone much change in regard to religious +observances. But there can be no question that amongst the upper +classes there are manifestations connected with religion now, which some +years ago were not thought of. The attendence of _men_ on public worship +is of itself an example of the change we speak of. I am afraid that when +Walter Scott described Monkbarns as being with difficulty "hounded out" +to hear the sermons of good Mr. Blattergowl, he wrote from a knowledge +of the habits of church-going then generally prevalent among Scottish +lairds. The late Bishop Sandford told me that when he first came to +Edinburgh--I suppose fifty years ago--few gentlemen attended +church--very few indeed were seen at the communion--so much so that it +was a matter of conversation when a male communicant, not an aged man, +was observed at the table for the first time. Sydney Smith, when +preaching in Edinburgh some forty years ago, seeing how almost +exclusively congregations were made up of ladies, took for his text the +verse from the Psalms, "Oh that men would therefore praise the Lord!" +and with that touch of the facetious which marked everything he did, +laid the emphasis on the word "men." Looking round the congregation and +saying, "Oh that _men_ would therefore praise the Lord!" implying that +he used the word, not to describe the human species generally, but the +male individuals as distinguished from the female portion. In regard to +attendance by young men, both at church and communion, a marked change +has taken place in my own experience. In fact, there is an attention +excited towards church subjects, which, thirty years ago, would have +been hardly credited. Nor is it only in connection with churches and +church services that these changes have been brought forth, but an +interest has been raised on the subject from Bible societies, missionary +associations at home and abroad, schools and reformatory institutions, +most of which, as regard active operation, have grown up during +fifty years. + +Nor should I omit to mention, what I trust may be considered as a change +belonging to religious feeling--viz., that conversation is now +conducted without that accompaniment of those absurd and unmeaning oaths +which were once considered an essential embellishment of polite +discourse. I distinctly recollect an elderly gentleman, when describing +the opinion of a refined and polished female upon a particular point, +putting into her mouth an unmistakable round oath as the natural +language in which people's sentiments and opinions would be ordinarily +conveyed. This is a change wrought in men's feelings, which all must +hail with great pleasure. Putting out of sight for a moment the sin of +such a practice, and the bad influence it must have had upon all +emotions of reverence for the name and attributes of the Divine Being, +and the natural effect of profane swearing, to "harden a' within," we +might marvel at the utter folly and incongruity of making swearing +accompany every expression of anger or surprise, or of using oaths as +mere expletives in common discourse. A quaint anecdote, descriptive of +such senseless ebullition, I have from a friend who mentioned the names +of parties concerned:--A late Duke of Athole had invited a well-known +character, a writer of Perth, to come up and meet him at Dunkeld for the +transaction of some business. The Duke mentioned the day and hour when +he should receive the man of law, who accordingly came punctually at the +appointed time and place. But the Duke had forgotten the appointment, +and gone to the hill, from which he could not return for some hours. A +Highlander present described the Perth writer's indignation, and his +mode of showing it by a most elaborate course of swearing. "But whom did +he swear at?" was the inquiry made of the narrator, who replied, "Oh, he +didna sweer at ony thing particular, but juist stude in ta middle of ta +road and swoor at lairge." I have from a friend also an anecdote which +shows how entirely at one period the practice of swearing had become +familiar even to female ears when mixed up with the intercourse of +social life. A sister had been speaking of her brother as much addicted +to this habit--"Oor John sweers awfu', and we try to correct him; but," +she added in a candid and apologetic tone, "nae doubt it _is_ a great +set aff to conversation." There was something of rather an _admiring_ +character in the description of an outbreak of swearing by a Deeside +body. He had been before the meeting of Justices for some offence +against the excise laws, and had been promised some assistance and +countenance by my cousin, the laird of Finzean, who was unfortunately +addicted to the practice in question. The poor fellow had not got off so +well as he had expected, and on giving an account of what took place to +a friend, he was asked, "But did not Finzean speak for you?" "Na," he +replied, "he didna say muckle; but oh, he damned bonny!" + +This is the place to notice a change which has taken place in regard to +some questions of taste in the building and embellishing of Scottish +places of worship. Some years back there was a great jealousy of +ornament in connection with churches and church services, and, in fact, +all such embellishments were considered as marks of a departure from the +simplicity of old Scottish worship,--they were distinctive of Episcopacy +as opposed to the severer modes of Presbyterianism. The late Sir William +Forbes used to give an account of a conversation, indicative of this +feeling, which he had overheard between an Edinburgh inhabitant and his +friend from the country. They were passing St. John's, which had just +been finished, and the countryman asked, "Whatna kirk was that?" "Oh," +said the townsman, "that is an English chapel," meaning Episcopalian. +"Ay," said his friend, "there'll be a walth o' _images_ there." But, if +unable to sympathise with architectural church ornament and +embellishment, how much less could they sympathise with the performance +of divine service, which included such musical accompaniments as +intoning, chanting, and anthems! On the first introduction of +Tractarianism into Scotland, the full choir service had been established +in an Episcopal church, where a noble family had adopted those views, +and carried them out regardless of expense. The lady who had been +instrumental in getting up these musical services was very anxious that +a favourite female servant of the family--a Presbyterian of the old +school--should have an opportunity of hearing them; accordingly, she +very kindly took her down to church in the carriage, and on returning +asked her what she thought of the music, etc. "Ou, it's verra bonny, +verra bonny; but oh, my lady, it's an awfu' way of spending the +Sabbath." The good woman could only look upon the whole thing as a +musical performance. The organ was a great mark of distinction between +Episcopalian and Presbyterian places of worship. I have heard of an old +lady describing an Episcopalian clergyman, without any idea of +disrespect, in these terms:--"Oh, he is a whistle-kirk minister." From +an Australian correspondent I have an account of the difference between +an Episcopal minister and a Presbyterian minister, as remarked by an +old Scottish lady of his acquaintance. Being asked in what the +difference was supposed to consist, after some consideration she +replied, "Weel, ye see, the Presbyterian minister wears his sark under +his coat, the Episcopal minister wears his sark aboon his coat." Of late +years, however, a spirit of greater tolerance of such things has been +growing up amongst us,--a greater tolerance, I suspect, even of organs +and liturgies. In fact, we may say a new era has begun in Scotland as to +church architecture and church ornaments. The use of stained glass in +churches--forming memorial windows for the departed[19], a free use of +crosses as architectural ornaments, and restoration of ancient edifices, +indicate a revolution of feeling regarding this question. Beautiful and +expensive churches are rising everywhere, in connection with various +denominations. It is not long since the building or repairing a new +church, or the repairing and adapting an old church, implied in Scotland +simply a production of the greatest possible degree of ugliness and bad +taste at the least possible expense, and certainly never included any +notion of ornament in the details. Now, large sums are expended on +places of worship, without reference to creed. First-rate architects are +employed. Fine Gothic structures are produced. The rebuilding of the +Greyfriars' Church, the restoration of South Leith Church and of Glasgow +Cathedral, the very bold experiment of adopting a style little known +amongst us, the pure Lombard, in a church for Dr. W.L. Alexander, on +George IV. Bridge, Edinburgh; the really splendid Free Churches, St. +Mary's, in Albany Street, and the Barclay Church, Bruntsfield, and many +similar cases, mark the spirit of the times regarding the application of +what is beautiful in art to the service of religion. One might hope that +changes such as these in the feelings, tastes, and associations, would +have a beneficial effect in bringing the worshippers themselves into a +more genial spirit of forbearance with each other. A friend of mine used +to tell a story of an honest builder's views of church differences, +which was very amusing, and quaintly professional. An English gentleman, +who had arrived in a Scottish country town, was walking about to examine +the various objects which presented themselves, and observed two rather +handsome places of worship in course of erection nearly opposite to each +other. He addressed a person, who happened to be the contractor for the +chapels, and asked, "What was the difference between these two places of +worship which were springing up so close to each other?"--meaning, of +course, the difference of the theological tenets of the two +congregations. The contractor, who thought only of architectural +differences, innocently replied, "There may be a difference of sax feet +in length, but there's no aboon a few inches in the breadth." Would that +all our religious differences could be brought within so narrow +a compass! + +The variety of churches in a certain county of Scotland once called +forth a sly remark upon our national tendencies to religious division +and theological disputation. An English gentleman sitting on the box, +and observing the great number of places of worship in the aforesaid +borough, remarked to the coachman that there must be a great deal of +religious feeling in a town which produced so many houses of God. + +"Na," said the man quietly, "it's no religion, it's _curstness," i.e._ +crabbedness, insinuating that acerbity of temper, as well as zeal, was +occasionally the cause of congregations being multiplied. + +It might be a curious question to consider how far motives founded on +mere taste or sentiment may have operated in creating an interest +towards religion, and in making it a more prominent and popular question +than it was in the early portion of the present century. There are in +this country two causes which have combined in producing these +effects:--1st. The great disruption which took place in the Church of +Scotland no doubt called forth an attention to the subject which stirred +up the public, and made religion at any rate a topic of deep interest +for discussion and partizanship. Men's minds were not _allowed_ to +remain in the torpid condition of a past generation. 2d. The aesthetic +movement in religion, which some years since was made in England, has, +of course, had its influence in Scotland; and many who showed little +concern about religion, whilst it was merely a question of doctrines, of +precepts, and of worship, threw themselves keenly into the contest when +it became associated with ceremonial, and music, and high art. New +ecclesiastical associations have been presented to Scottish tastes and +feelings. With some minds, attachment to the church is attachment to her +Gregorian tones, jewelled chalices, lighted candles, embroidered +altar-cloths, silver crosses, processions, copes, albs, and chasubles. +But, from whatever cause it proceeds, a great change has taken place in +the general interest excited towards ecclesiastical questions. Religion +now has numerous associations with the ordinary current of human life. +In times past it was kept more as a thing apart. There was a false +delicacy which made people shrink from encountering appellations that +were usually bestowed upon those who made a more prominent religious +profession than the world at large. + +A great change has taken place in this respect with persons of _all_ +shades of religious opinions. With an increased attention to the +_externals_ of religion, we believe that in many points the heart has +been more exercised also. Take, as an example, the practice of family +prayer. Many excellent and pious households of the former generation +would not venture upon the observance, I am afraid, because they were in +dread of the sneer. There was a foolish application of the terms +"Methodist" "saints," "over-righteous," where the practice was observed. +It was to take up a rather decided position in the neighbourhood; and I +can testify, that less than fifty years ago a family would have been +marked and talked of for a usage of which now throughout the country the +_exception_ is rather the unusual circumstance. A little anecdote from +recollections in my own family will furnish a good illustration of a +state of feeling on this point now happily unknown. In a northern town +of the east coast, where the earliest recollections of my life go back, +there was usually a detachment of a regiment, who were kindly received +and welcomed to the society, which in the winter months was very full +and very gay. There was the usual measure of dining, dancing, supping, +card-playing, and gossiping, which prevailed in country towns at the +time. The officers were of course an object of much interest to the +natives, and their habits were much discussed. A friend was staying in +the family who partook a good deal of the Athenian temperament--viz. +delight in hearing and telling some new thing. On one occasion she burst +forth in great excitement with the intelligence that "Sir Nathaniel +Duckinfield, the officer in command of the detachment, had family +prayers _every_ morning!" A very near and dear relative of mine, knowing +the tendency of the lady to gossip, pulled her up with the exclamation: +"How can you repeat such things, Miss Ogilvy? nothing in the world but +the ill-natured stories of Montrose!" The remark was made quite +innocently, and unconsciously of the bitter satire it conveyed upon the +feeling of the place. The "ill-nature" of these stories was true enough, +because ill-nature was the motive of those who raised them; not because +it is an ill-natured thing of itself to say of a family that they have +household worship, but the ill-nature consisted in their intending to +throw out a sneer and a sarcasm upon a subject where all such +reflections are unbecoming and indecorous. It is one of the best proofs +of change of habits and associations on this matter, that the anecdote, +exquisite as it is for our purpose, will hardly be understood by many of +our young friends, or, at least, happily has lost much of its force +and pungency. + +These remarks apply perhaps more especially to the state of religious +feeling amongst the upper classes of society. Though I am not aware of +so much change in the religious habits of the Scottish peasantry, still +the elders have yielded much from the sternness of David Deans; and upon +the whole view of the question there have been many and great changes in +the Scottish people during the last sixty years. It could hardly be +otherwise, when we consider the increased facilities of communication +between the two countries--a facility which extends to the introduction +of English books upon religious subjects. The most popular and engaging +works connected with the Church of England have now a free circulation +in Scotland; and it is impossible that such productions as the +"Christian Year," for example, and many others--whether for good or bad +is not now the question--should not produce their effects upon minds +trained in the strictest school of Calvinistic theology. I should be +disposed to _extend_ the boundaries of this division, and to include +under "Religious Feelings and Religious Observances" many anecdotes +which belong perhaps rather indirectly than directly to the subject. +There is a very interesting reminiscence, and one of a sacred character +also, which I think will come very suitably under this head. When I +joined the Scottish Episcopal Church, nearly fifty years ago, it was +quite customary for members of our communion to ask for the blessing of +their Bishop, and to ask it especially on any remarkable event in their +life, as marriage, loss of friends, leaving home, returning home, etc.; +and it was the custom amongst the old Scottish Episcopalians to give the +blessing in a peculiar form, which had become venerable from its +traditionary application by our bishops. I have myself received it from +my bishop, the late good Bishop Walker, and have heard him pronounce it +on others. But whether the custom of asking the bishop's blessing be +past or not, the form I speak of has become a reminiscence, and I feel +assured is not known even by some of our own bishops. I shall give it to +my readers as I received it from the family of the late Bishop Walker of +Edinburgh:-- + + "God Almighty bless thee with his Holy Spirit; + Guard thee in thy going out and coming in; + Keep thee ever in his faith and fear; + Free from Sin, and safe from Danger." + +I have been much pleased with a remark of my friend, the Rev. W. +Gillespie of the U.P. Church, Edinburgh, upon this subject. He writes to +me as follows:--"I read with particular interest the paragraph on the +subject of the Bishop's Blessing, for certainly there seems to be in +these days a general disbelief in the efficacy of blessings, and a +neglect or disregard of the practice. If the spirit of God is in good +men, as He certainly is, then who can doubt the value and the efficacy +of the blessing which they bestow? I remember being blessed by a very +venerable minister, John Dempster of Denny, while kneeling in his study, +shortly before I left this country to go to China, and his prayer over +me then was surely the effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man. Its +effect upon me then and ever since will never be forgotten." + +I quite agree with Mr. Gillespie on the point, and think it not a good +sign either of our religious belief or religious feeling that such +blessings should become really a matter of reminiscence; for if we are +taught to pray for one another, and if we are taught that the "prayer of +the righteous availeth much," surely we ought to _bless_ one another, +and surely the blessing of those who are venerable in the church from +their position, their age, and their piety, may be expected to avail as +an aid and incentive to piety in those who in God's name are so blest. +It has struck me that on a subject closely allied with religious +feelings a great change has taken place in Scotland during a period of +less than fifty years--I mean the attention paid to cemeteries as +depositories of the mortal remains of those who have departed. In my +early days I never recollect seeing any efforts made for the +embellishment and adornment of our churchyards; if tolerably secured by +fences, enough had been done. The English and Welsh practices of +planting flowers, keeping the turf smooth and dressed over the graves +of friends, were quite unknown. Indeed, I suspect such attention fifty +years ago would have been thought by the sterner Presbyterians as +somewhat savouring of superstition. The account given by Sir W. Scott, +in "Guy Mannering," of an Edinburgh burial-place, was universally +applicable to Scottish sepulchres[20]. A very different state of matters +has grown up within the last few years. Cemeteries and churchyards are +now as carefully ornamented in Scotland as in England. Shrubs, flowers, +smooth turf, and neatly-kept gravel walks, are a pleasing accompaniment +to head-stones, crosses, and varied forms of monumental memorials, in +freestone, marble, and granite. Nay, more than these, not unfrequently +do we see an imitation of French sentiment, in wreaths of "everlasting" +placed over graves as emblems of immortality; and in more than one of +our Edinburgh cemeteries I have seen these enclosed in glass cases to +preserve them from the effects of wind and rain. + +In consequence of neglect, the unprotected state of churchyards was +evident from the number of stories in circulation connected with the +circumstance of timid and excited passengers going amongst the tombs of +the village. The following, amongst others, has been communicated. The +_locale_ of the story is unknown, but it is told of a weaver who, after +enjoying his potations, pursued his way home through the churchyard, +his vision and walking somewhat impaired. As he proceeded he diverged +from the path, and unexpectedly stumbled into a partially made grave. +Stunned for a while, he lay in wonder at his descent, and after some +time he got out, but he had not proceeded much farther when a similar +calamity befell him. At this second fall, he was heard, in a tone of +wonder and surprise, to utter the following exclamation, referring to +what he considered the untenanted graves: "Ay! ir ye a' up an' awa?" + +The kindly feelings and interest of the pastoral relation always formed +a very pleasing intercourse between minister and people. I have received +from an anonymous correspondent an anecdote illustrative of this happy +connection, for which he vouches as authentic:-- + +John Brown, Burgher minister at Whitburn (son of the commentator, and +father of the late Rev. Dr. John Brown of Edinburgh, and grandfather of +the present accomplished M.D. of the same name, author of "Rab and his +Friends," etc.), in the early part of the century was travelling on a +small sheltie[21] to attend the summer sacrament at Haddington. Between +Musselburgh and Tranent he overtook one of his own people. "What are ye +daein' here, Janet, and whaur ye gaun in this warm weather?" "'Deed, +sir," quo' Janet, "I'm gaun to Haddington _for the occasion_[22] an' +expeck to hear ye preach this efternoon." "Very weel, Janet, but whaur +ye gaun tae sleep?" "I dinna ken, sir, but Providence is aye kind, an'll +provide a bed." On Mr. Brown jogged, but kindly thought of his humble +follower; accordingly, after service in the afternoon, before +pronouncing the blessing, he said from the pulpit, "Whaur's the auld +wifie that followed me frae Whitburn?" "Here I'm, sir," uttered a shrill +voice from a back seat. "Aweel," said Mr. Brown, "I have fand ye a bed; +ye're to sleep wi' Johnnie Fife's lass." + +There was at all times amongst the older Scottish peasantry a bold +assertion of their religious opinions, and strong expression of their +feelings. The spirit of the Covenanters lingered amongst the aged people +whom I remember, but which time has considerably softened down. We have +some recent authentic instances of this readiness in Scotsmen to bear +testimony to their principles:-- + +A friend has informed me that the late Lord Rutherfurd often told with +much interest of a rebuke which he received from a shepherd, near +Bonaly, amongst the Pentlands. He had entered into conversation with +him, and was complaining bitterly of the weather, which prevented him +enjoying his visit to the country, and said hastily and unguardedly, +"What a d--d mist!" and then expressed his wonder how or for what +purpose there should have been such a thing created as east wind. The +shepherd, a tall, grim figure, turned sharp round upon him. "What ails +ye at the mist, sir? it weets the sod, it slockens the yowes, +and"--adding with much solemnity--"it's God's wull;" and turned away +with lofty indignation. Lord Rutherfurd used to repeat this with much +candour as a fine specimen of a rebuke from a sincere and simple mind. + +There was something very striking in the homely, quaint, and severe +expressions on religious subjects which marked the old-fashioned piety +of persons shadowed forth in Sir Walter Scott's Davie Deans. We may add +to the rebuke of the shepherd of Bonaly, of Lord Rutherfurd's remark +about the east wind, his answer to Lord Cockburn, the proprietor of +Bonaly. He was sitting on the hill-side with the shepherd, and observing +the sheep reposing in the coldest situation, he observed to him, "John, +if I were a sheep, I would lie on the other side of the hill." The +shepherd answered, "Ay, my lord, but if ye had been a sheep ye would hae +had mair sense." + +Of such men as this shepherd were formed the elders--a class of men who +were marked by strong features of character, and who, in former times, +bore a distinguished part in all church matters. + +The old Scottish elder was in fact quite as different a character from +the modern elder, as the old Scottish minister was from the modern +pastor. These good men were not disposed to hide their lights, and +perhaps sometimes encroached a little upon the office of the minister. A +clergyman had been remarking to one of his elders that he was +unfortunately invited to two funerals on one day, and that they were +fixed for the same hour. "Weel, sir," answered the elder, "if ye'll tak +the tane I'll tak the tither." + +Some of the elders were great humorists and originals in their way. An +elder of the kirk at Muthill used to manifest his humour and originality +by his mode of collecting the alms. As he went round with the ladle, he +reminded such members of the congregation as seemed backward in their +duty, by giving them a poke with the "brod," and making, in an audible +whisper, such remarks as these--"Wife at the braid mailin, mind the +puir;" "Lass wi' the braw plaid, mind the puir," etc., a mode of +collecting which marks rather a bygone state of things. But on no +question was the old Scottish disciplinarian, whether elder or not, more +sure to raise his testimony than on anything connected with a +desecration of the Sabbath. In this spirit was the rebuke given to an +eminent geologist, when visiting in the Highlands:--The professor was +walking on the hills one Sunday morning, and partly from the effect of +habit, and partly from not adverting to the very strict notions of +Sabbath desecration entertained in Ross-shire, had his pocket hammer in +hand, and was thoughtlessly breaking the specimens of minerals he picked +up by the way. Under these circumstances, he was met by an old man +steadily pursuing his way to his church. For some time the patriarch +observed the movements of the geologist, and at length, going up to him, +quietly said, "Sir, ye're breaking something there forbye the stanes!" + +The same feeling, under a more fastidious form, was exhibited to a +traveller by a Scottish peasant:--An English artist travelling +professionally through Scotland, had occasion to remain over Sunday in a +small town in the north. To while away the time, he walked out a short +way in the environs, where the picturesque ruin of a castle met his eye. +He asked a countryman who was passing to be so good as tell him the name +of the castle. The reply was somewhat startling--"It's no the day to be +speerin' sic things!" + +A manifestation of even still greater strictness on the subject of +Sabbath desecration, I have received from a relative of the family in +which it occurred. About fifty years ago the Hon. Mrs. Stewart lived in +Heriot Row, who had a cook, Jeannie by name, a paragon of excellence. +One Sunday morning when her daughter (afterwards Lady Elton) went into +the kitchen, she was surprised to find a new jack (recently ordered, and +which was constructed on the principle of going constantly without +winding up) wholly paralysed and useless. Miss Stewart naturally +inquired what accident had happened to the new jack, as it had stopped. +The mystery was soon solved by Jeannie indignantly exclaiming that "she +was nae gaeing to hae the fule thing clocking and rinning about in _her_ +kitchen a' the blessed Sabbath day." + +There sometimes appears to have been in our countrymen an undue +preponderance of zeal for Sabbath observance as compared with the +importance attached to _other_ religious duties, and especially as +compared with the virtue of sobriety. The following dialogue between Mr. +Macnee of Glasgow, the celebrated artist, and an old Highland +acquaintance whom he had met with unexpectedly, will illustrate the +contrast between the severity of judgment passed upon treating the +Sabbath with levity and the lighter censure attached to indulgence in +whisky. Mr. Macnee begins, "Donald, what brought you here?" "Ou, weel, +sir, it was a baad place yon; they were baad folk--but they're a +God-fearin' set o' folk here!" "Well, Donald," said Mr. M., "I'm glad to +hear it." "Ou ay, sir, 'deed are they; an' I'll gie ye an instance o't. +Last Sabbath, just as the kirk was skailin,' there was a drover chield +frae Dumfries comin' along the road whustlin,' an' lookin' _as happy_ as +if it was ta middle o' ta week; weel, sir, oor laads is a God-fearin' +set o' laads, an' they were just comin' oot o' the kirk--'od they yokit +upon him, an' a'most killed him!" Mr. M., to whom their zeal seemed +scarcely sufficiently well directed to merit his approbation, then asked +Donald whether it had been drunkenness that induced the depravity of his +former neighbours? "Weel, weel, sir," said Donald, with some hesitation, +"_may_-be; I'll no say but it micht." "Depend upon it," said Mr. M., +"it's a bad thing whisky." "Weel, weel, sir," replied Donald, "I'll no +say but it _may_;" adding in a very decided tone--"speeciallie +_baad_ whusky!" + +I do not know any anecdote which illustrates in a more striking and +natural manner the strong feeling which exists in the Scottish mind on +this subject. At a certain time, the hares in the neighbourhood of a +Scottish burgh had, from the inclemency of the season or from some other +cause, become emboldened more than usual to approach the dwelling-places +of men; so much so that on one Sunday morning a hare was seen skipping +along the street as the people were going to church. An old man, spying +puss in this unusual position, significantly remarked, "Ay, yon beast +kens weel it is the Sabbath-day;" taking it for granted that no one in +the place would be found audacious enough to hurt the animal on +a Sunday. + +Lady Macneil supplies an excellent pendant to Miss Stewart's story about +the jack going on the Sunday. Her henwife had got some Dorking fowls, +and on Lady M. asking if they were laying many eggs, she replied, with +great earnestness, "Indeed my leddy, they lay every day, no' excepting +the blessed Sabbath." + +There were, however, old persons at that time who were not quite so +orthodox on the point of Sabbath observance; and of these a lady +residing in Dumfries was known often to employ her wet Sundays in +arranging her wardrobe. "Preserve us!" she said on one occasion, +"anither gude Sunday! I dinna ken whan I'll get thae drawers redd up." + +In connection with the awful subject of death and all its concomitants, +it has been often remarked that the older generation of Scottish people +used to view the circumstances belonging to the decease of their nearest +and dearest friends with a coolness which does not at first sight seem +consistent with their deep and sincere religious impressions. Amongst +the peasantry this was sometimes manifested in an extraordinary and +startling manner. I do not believe that those persons had less affection +for their friends than a corresponding class in England, but they had +less awe of the concomitants of death, and approached them with more +familiarity. For example, I remember long ago at Fasque, my +sister-in-law visiting a worthy and attached old couple, of whom the +husband, Charles Duncan, who had been gardener at Fasque for above +thirty years was evidently dying. He was sitting on a common deal chair, +and on my sister proposing to send down for his use an old arm-chair +which she recollected was laid up in a garret, his wife exclaimed +against such a needless trouble: "Hout, my leddy, what would he be duin' +wi' an arm-chair? he's just deein' fast awa." I have two anecdotes, +illustrative of the same state of feeling, from a lady of ancient +Scottish family accustomed to visit her poor dependants on the property, +and to notice their ways. She was calling at a decent cottage, and found +the occupant busy carefully ironing out some linens. The lady remarked, +"Those are fine linens you have got there, Janet." "Troth, mem," was the +reply, "they're just the gudeman's _deed_ claes, and there are nane +better i' the parish." On another occasion, when visiting an excellent +woman, to condole with her on the death of her nephew, with whom she had +lived, and whose loss must have been severely felt by her, she remarked, +"What a nice white cap you have got, Margaret." "Indeed, mem, ay, sae it +is; for ye see the gude lad's winding sheet was ower lang, and I cut aff +as muckle as made twa bonny mutches" (caps). + +There certainly was a quaint and familiar manner in which sacred and +solemn subjects were referred to by the older Scottish race, who did +not mean to be irreverent, but who no doubt appeared so to a more +refined but not really a more religious generation. + +It seems to me that this plainness of speech arose in part from the +_sincerity_ of their belief in all the circumstances of another +condition of being. They spoke of things hereafter as positive +certainties, and viewed things invisible through the same medium as they +viewed things present. The following is illustrative of such a state of +mind, and I am assured of its perfect authenticity and literal +correctness:--"Joe M'Pherson and his wife lived in Inverness. They had +two sons, who helped their father in his trade of a smith. They were +industrious and careful, but not successful. The old man had bought a +house, leaving a large part of the price unpaid. It was the ambition of +his life to pay off that debt, but it was too much for him, and he died +in the struggle. His sons kept on the business with the old industry, +and with better fortune. At last their old mother fell sick, and told +her sons she was dying, as in truth she was. The elder son said to her, +'Mother, you'll soon be with my father; no doubt you'll have much to +tell him; but dinna forget this, mother, mind ye, tell him _the house is +freed_. He'll be glad to hear that.'" + +A similar feeling is manifest in the following conversation, which, I am +assured, is authentic:--At Hawick the people used to wear wooden clogs, +which make a _clanking_ noise on the pavement. A dying old woman had +some friends by her bedside, who said to her, "Weel, Jenny, ye are gaun +to heeven, an' gin you should see oor folk, you can tell them that we're +a' weel." To which Jenny replied, "Weel, gin I should see them I'se tell +them, but you manna expect that I am to gang clank clanking through +heevan looking for your folk." + +But of all stories of this class, I think the following deathbed +conversation between a Scottish husband and wife is about the richest +specimen of a dry Scottish matter-of-fact view of a very serious +question:--An old shoemaker in Glasgow was sitting by the bedside of his +wife, who was dying. She took him by the hand. "Weel, John, we're gawin +to part. I hae been a gude wife to you, John." "Oh, just middling, just +middling, Jenny," said John, not disposed to commit himself. "John," +says she, "ye maun promise to bury me in the auld kirk-yard at Stra'von, +beside my mither. I couldna rest in peace among unco folk, in the dirt +and smoke o' Glasgow." "Weel, weel, Jenny, my woman," said John +soothingly, "we'll just pit you in the Gorbals _first_, and gin ye dinna +lie quiet, we'll try you sine in Stra'von." + +The same unimaginative and matter-of-fact view of things connected with +the other world extended to a very youthful age, as in the case of a +little boy who, when told of heaven, put the question, "An' will faather +be there?" His instructress answered, "of course, she hoped he would be +there;" to which he sturdily at once replied, "Then I'll no gang." + +We might apply these remarks in some measure to the Scottish pulpit +ministrations of an older school, in which a minuteness of detail and a +quaintness of expression were quite common, but which could not now be +tolerated. I have two specimens of such antiquated language, supplied by +correspondents, and I am assured they are both genuine. + +The first is from a St. Andrews professor, who is stated to be a great +authority in such narratives. + +In one of our northern counties, a rural district had its harvest +operations affected by continuous rains. The crops being much laid, wind +was desired in order to restore them to a condition fit for the sickle. +A minister, in his Sabbath services, expressed their want in prayer as +follows:--"O Lord, we pray thee to send us wind; no a rantin' tantin' +tearin' wind, but a noohin' (noughin?) soughin' winnin' wind." More +expressive words than these could not be found in any language. + +The other story relates to a portion of the Presbyterian service on +sacramental occasions, called "fencing the tables," _i.e._ prohibiting +the approach of those who were unworthy to receive. + +This fencing of the tables was performed in the following effective +manner by an old divine, whose flock transgressed the third commandment, +not in a gross and loose manner, but in its minor details:--"I debar all +those who use such minced oaths as faith! troth! losh! gosh! and +lovanendie!" + +These men often showed a quiet vein of humour in their prayers, as in +the case of the old minister of the Canongate, who always prayed, +previous to the meeting of the General Assembly, that the Assembly might +be so guided as "_no to do ony harm."_ + +A circumstance connected with Scottish church discipline has undergone a +great change in my time--I mean the public censure from the pulpit, in +the time of divine service, of offenders previously convicted before the +minister and his kirk-session. This was performed by the guilty person +standing up before the congregation on a raised platform, called the +_cutty stool_, and receiving a rebuke. I never saw it done, but have +heard in my part of the country of the discipline being enforced +occasionally. Indeed, I recollect an instance where the rebuke was thus +administered and received under circumstances of a touching character, +and which made it partake of the moral sublime. The daughter of the +minister had herself committed an offence against moral purity, such as +usually called forth this church censure. The minister peremptorily +refused to make her an exception to his ordinary practice. His child +stood up in the congregation, and received, from her agonised father, a +rebuke similar to that administered to other members of his congregation +for a like offence. The spirit of the age became unfavourable to the +practice. The rebuke on the cutty stool, like the penance in a white +sheet in England, went out of use, and the circumstance is now a matter +of "reminiscence." I have received some communications on the subject, +which bear upon this point; and I subjoin the following remarks from a +kind correspondent, a clergyman, to whom I am largely indebted, as +indicating the great change which has taken place in this matter. + +"Church discipline," he writes, "was much more vigorously enforced in +olden time than it is now. A certain couple having been guilty of +illicit intercourse, and also within the forbidden degrees of +consanguinity, appeared before the Presbytery of Lanark, and made +confession in sackcloth. They were ordered to return to their own +session, and to stand at the kirk-door, barefoot and barelegged, from +the second bell to the last, and thereafter in the public place of +repentance; and, at direction of the session, thereafter to go through +the whole kirks of the presbytery, and to satisfy them in like manner. +If such penance were now enforced for like offences, I believe the +registration books of many parishes in Scotland would become more +creditable in certain particulars than they unfortunately are at the +present time." + +But there was a less formidable ecclesiastical censure occasionally +given by the minister from the pulpit against lesser misdemeanours, +which took place under his own eye, such as levity of conduct or +_sleeping_ in church. A most amusing specimen of such censure was once +inflicted by the minister upon his own wife for an offence not in our +day visited with so heavy a penalty. The clergyman had observed one of +his flock asleep during his sermon. He paused, and called him to order. +"Jeems Robson, ye are sleepin'; I insist on your wauking when God's word +is preached to ye." "Weel, sir, you may look at your ain seat, and ye'll +see a sleeper forbye me," answered Jeems, pointing to the clergyman's +lady in the minister's pew. "Then, Jeems," said the minister, "when ye +see my wife asleep again, haud up your hand." By and by the arm was +stretched out, and sure enough the fair lady was caught in the act. Her +husband solemnly called upon her to stand up and receive the censure due +to her offence. He thus addressed her:--"Mrs. B., a'body kens that when +I got ye for my wife, I got nae beauty; yer frien's ken that I got nae +siller; and if I dinna get God's grace, I shall hae a puir +bargain indeed." + +The quaint and original humour of the old Scottish minister came out +occasionally in the more private services of his vocation as well as in +church. As the whole service, whether for baptisms or marriages, is +supplied by the clergyman officiating, there is more scope for scenes +between the parties present than at similar ministrations by a +prescribed form. Thus, a late minister of Caithness, when examining a +member of his flock, who was a butcher, in reference to the baptism of +his child, found him so deficient in what he considered the needful +theological knowledge, that he said to him, "Ah, Sandy, I doubt ye're +no fit to haud up the bairn." Sandy, conceiving that reference was made +not to spiritual but to physical incapacity, answered indignantly, +"Hout, minister, I could haud him up an he were a twa-year-auld +stirk[23]." A late humorous old minister, near Peebles, who had strong +feelings on the subject of matrimonial happiness, thus prefaced the +ceremony by an address to the parties who came to him:--"My friends, +marriage is a blessing to a few, a curse to many, and a great +uncertainty to all. Do ye venture?" After a pause, he repeated with +great emphasis, "Do ye venture?" No objection being made to the venture, +he then said, "Let's proceed." + +The old Scottish hearers were very particular on the subject of their +minister's preaching old sermons; and to repeat a discourse which they +could recollect was always made a subject of animadversion by those who +heard it. A beadle, who was a good deal of a wit in his way, gave a sly +hit in his pretended defence of his minister on the question. As they +were proceeding from church, the minister observed the beadle had been +laughing as if he had triumphed over some of the parishioners with whom +he had been in conversation. On asking the cause of this, he received +for answer, "Dod, sir, they were saying ye had preached an auld sermon +to-day, but I tackled them, for I tauld them it was no an auld sermon, +for the minister had preached it no sax months syne." + +I remember the minister of Banchory, Mr. Gregory, availed himself of the +feelings of his people on this subject for the purpose of accomplishing +a particular object. During the building of the new church the service +had to be performed in a schoolroom, which did not nearly hold the +congregation. The object was to get part of the parish to attend in the +morning, and part in the afternoon. Mr. Gregory prevented those who had +attended in the morning from returning in the afternoon by just giving +them, as he said, "cauld kail het again." + +It is somewhat remarkable, however, that, notwithstanding this feeling +in the matter of a repetition of old sermons, there was amongst a large +class of Scottish preachers of a former day such a sameness of subject +as really sometimes made it difficult to distinguish the discourse of +one Sunday from amongst others. These were entirely doctrinal, and +however they might commence, after the opening or introduction hearers +were certain to find the preacher falling gradually into the old +channel. The fall of man in Adam, his restoration in Christ, +justification by faith, and the terms of the new covenant, formed the +staple of each sermon, and without which it was not in fact reckoned +complete as an orthodox exposition of Christian doctrine. Without +omitting the essentials of Christian instruction, preachers now take a +wider view of illustrating and explaining the gospel scheme of salvation +and regeneration, without constant recurrence to the elemental and +fundamental principles of the faith. From my friend Dr. Cook of +Haddington (who it is well known has a copious stock of old Scotch +traditionary anecdotes) I have an admirable illustration of this state +of things as regards pulpit instruction. + +"Much of the preaching of the Scotch clergy," Dr. Cook observes, "in the +last century, was almost exclusively doctrinal--the fall: the nature, +the extent, and the application of the remedy. In the hands of able men, +no doubt, there might be much variety of exposition, but with weaker or +indolent men preaching extempore, or without notes, it too often ended +in a weekly repetition of what had been already said. An old elder of +mine, whose recollection might reach back from sixty to seventy years, +said to me one day, 'Now-a-days, people make a work if a minister preach +the same sermon over again in the course of two or three years. When I +was a boy, we would have wondered if old Mr. W---- had preached anything +else than what we heard the Sunday before.' My old friend used to tell +of a clergyman who had held forth on the broken covenant till his people +longed for a change. The elders waited on him to intimate their wish. +They were examined on their knowledge of the subject, found deficient, +rebuked, and dismissed, but after a little while they returned to the +charge, and the minister gave in. Next Lord's day he read a large +portion of the history of Joseph and his brethren, as the subject of a +lecture. He paraphrased it, greatly, no doubt, to the detriment of the +original, but much to the satisfaction of his people, for it was +something new. He finished the paraphrase, 'and now,' says he, 'my +friends, we shall proceed to draw some lessons and inferences; and, +_1st_, you will observe that the sacks of Joseph's brethren were +_ripit_, and in them was found the cup; so your sacks will be ripit at +the day of judgment, and the first thing found in them will be the +broken covenant;' and having gained this advantage, the sermon went off +into the usual strain, and embodied the usual heads of elementary +dogmatic theology." + +In connection with this topic, I have a communication from a +correspondent, who remarks--The story about the minister and his +favourite theme, "the broken covenant," reminds me of one respecting +another minister whose staple topics of discourse were "Justification, +Adoption, and Sanctification." Into every sermon he preached, he +managed, by hook or by crook, to force these three heads, so that his +general method of handling every text was not so much _expositio_ as +_impositio_. He was preaching on these words--"Is Ephraim my dear son? +Is he a pleasant child?" and he soon brought the question into the usual +formula by adding, Ephraim was a pleasant child--first, because he was a +justified child; second, because he was an adopted child; and third, +because he was a sanctified child. + +It should be remembered, however, that the Scottish peasantry +themselves--I mean those of the older school--delighted in expositions +of _doctrinal_ subjects, and in fact were extremely jealous of any +minister who departed from their high standard of orthodox divinity, by +selecting subjects which involved discussions of strictly moral or +_practical_ questions. It was condemned under the epithet of _legal_ +preaching; in other words, it was supposed to preach the law as +independent of the gospel. A worthy old clergyman having, upon the +occasion of a communion Monday, taken a text of such a character, was +thus commented on by an ancient dame of the congregation, who was +previously acquainted with his style of discourse:--"If there's an ill +text in a' the Bible, that creetur's aye sure to tak it." + +The great change--the great improvement, I would say--which has taken +place during the last half-century in the feelings and practical +relations of religion with social life is, that it has become more +diffused through all ranks and all characters. Before that period many +good sort of people were afraid of making their religious views very +prominent, and were always separated from those who did. Persons who +made a profession at all beyond the low standard generally adopted in +society were marked out as objects of fear or of distrust. The anecdote +at page 65 regarding the practice of family prayer fully proves this. +Now religious people and religion itself are not kept aloof from the +ordinary current of men's thoughts and actions. There is no such marked +line as used to be drawn round persons who make a decided profession of +religion. Christian men and women have stepped over the line, and, +without compromising their Christian principle, are not necessarily +either morose, uncharitable, or exclusive. The effects of the old +separation were injurious to men's minds. Religion was with many +associated with puritanism, with cant, and unfitness for the world. The +difference is marked also in the style of sermons prevalent at the two +periods. There were sermons of two descriptions--viz., sermons by +"_moderate_" clergy, of a purely moral or practical character; and +sermons purely doctrinal, from those who were known as "evangelical" +ministers. Hence arose an impression, and not unnaturally, on many +minds, that an almost exclusive reference to doctrinal subjects, and a +dread of upholding the law, and of enforcing its more minute details, +were not favourable to the cause of moral rectitude and practical +holiness of life. This was hinted in a sly way by a young member of the +kirk to his father, a minister of the severe and high Calvinistic +school. Old Dr. Lockhart of Glasgow was lamenting one day, in the +presence of his son John, the fate of a man who had been found guilty of +immoral practices, and the more so that he was one of his own elders. +"Well, father," remarked his son, "you see what you've driven him to." +In our best Scottish preaching at the present day no such distinction +is visible. + +The same feeling came forth with much point and humour on an occasion +referred to in "Carlyle's Memoirs." In a company where John Home and +David Hume were present, much wonder was expressed what _could_ have +induced a clerk belonging to Sir William Forbes' bank to abscond, and +embezzle L900. "I know what it was," said Home to the historian; "for +when he was taken there was found in his pocket a volume of your +philosophical works and Boston's 'Fourfold State'"--a hit, 1st, at the +infidel, whose principles would have undermined Christianity; and 2d, a +hit at the Church, which he was compelled to leave on account of his +having written the tragedy of Douglas. + +I can myself recollect an obsolete ecclesiastical custom, and which was +always practised in the church of Fettercairn during my boyish +days--viz., that of the minister bowing to the heritors in succession +who occupied the front gallery seats; and I am assured that this bowing +from the pulpit to the principal heritor or heritors after the blessing +had been pronounced was very common in rural parishes till about forty +years ago, and perhaps till a still later period. And when heritors +chanced to be pretty equally matched, there was sometimes an unpleasant +contest as to who was entitled to the precedence in having the _first_ +bow. A case of this kind once occurred in the parish of Lanark, which +was carried so far as to be laid before the Presbytery; but they, not +considering themselves "competent judges of the points of honour and +precedency among gentlemen, and to prevent all inconveniency in these +matters in the future, appointed the minister to forbear bowing to the +lairds at all from the pulpit for the time to come;" and they also +appointed four of their number "to wait upon the gentlemen, to deal with +them, for bringing them to condescend to submit hereunto, for the +success of the gospel and the peace of the parish." + +In connection with this subject, we may mention a ready and +complimentary reply once made by the late Reverend Dr. Wightman of +Kirkmahoe, on being rallied for his neglecting this usual act of +courtesy one Sabbath in his own church. The heritor who was entitled to +and always received this token of respect, was Mr. Miller, proprietor of +Dalswinton. One Sabbath the Dalswinton pew contained a bevy of ladies, +but no gentlemen, and the Doctor--perhaps because he was a bachelor and +felt a delicacy in the circumstances--omitted the usual salaam in their +direction. A few days after, meeting Miss Miller, who was widely famed +for her beauty, and who afterwards became Countess of Mar, she rallied +him, in presence of her companions, for not bowing to her from the +pulpit on the previous Sunday, and requested an explanation; when the +good Doctor immediately replied--"I beg your pardon, Miss Miller, but +you surely know that angel-worship is not allowed in the Church of +Scotland;" and lifting his hat, he made a low bow, and passed on. + +Scottish congregations, in some parts of the country, contain an element +in their composition quite unknown in English churches. In pastoral +parts of the country, it was an established practice for each shepherd +to bring his faithful _collie_ dog--at least it was so some years ago. +In a district of Sutherland, where the population is very scanty, the +congregations are made up one-half of dogs, each human member having his +canine companion. These dogs sit out the Gaelic services and sermon with +commendable patience, till towards the end of the last psalm, when there +is a universal stretching and yawning, and all are prepared to scamper +out, barking in a most excited manner whenever the blessing is +commenced. The congregation of one of these churches determined that the +service should close in a more decorous manner, and steps were taken to +attain this object. Accordingly, when a stranger clergyman was +officiating, he found the people all sitting when he was about to +pronounce the blessing. He hesitated, and paused, expecting them to +rise, till an old shepherd, looking up to the pulpit, said, "Say awa', +sir; we're a' sittin' to cheat the dowgs." + +There must have been some curious specimens of Scottish humour brought +out at the examinations or catechisings by ministers of the flock before +the administrations of the communion. Thus, with reference to human +nature before the fall, a man was asked, "What kind of man was Adam?" +"Ou, just like ither fouk." The minister insisted on having a more +special description of the first man, and pressed for more explanation. +"Weel," said the catechumen, "he was just like Joe Simson the +horse-couper." "How so?" asked the minister. "Weel, naebody got onything +by him, and mony lost." + +A lad had come for examination previous to his receiving his first +communion. The pastor, knowing that his young friend was not very +profound in his theology, and not wishing to discourage him, or keep him +from the table unless compelled to do so, began by asking what he +thought a safe question, and what would give him confidence. So he took +the Old Testament, and asked him, in reference to the Mosaic law, how +many commandments there were. After a little thought, he put his answer +in the modest form of a supposition, and replied, cautiously, +"Aiblins[24] a hunner." The clergyman was vexed, and told him such +ignorance was intolerable, that he could not proceed in examination, and +that the youth must wait and learn more; so he went away. On returning +home he met a friend on his way to the manse, and on learning that he +too was going to the minister for examination, shrewdly asked him, +"Weel, what will ye say noo if the minister speers hoo mony commandments +there are?" "Say! why, I shall say ten to be sure." To which the other +rejoined, with great triumph, "Ten! Try ye him wi' ten! I tried him wi' +a hunner, and he wasna satisfeed." Another answer from a little girl was +shrewd and reflective. The question was, "Why did the Israelites make a +golden calf?" "They hadna as muckle siller as wad mak a coo." + +A kind correspondent has sent me, from personal knowledge, an admirable +pendant to stones of Scottish child acuteness and shrewd observation. A +young lady friend of his, resident in a part of Ayrshire rather remote +from any very satisfactory administration of the gospel, is in the habit +of collecting the children of the neighbourhood on Sundays at the "big +hoose," for religious instruction. On one occasion the class had +repeated the paraphrase of the Lord's Prayer, which contains +these lines-- + + "Give us this day our daily bread, + And raiment _fit_ provide." + +There being no question as to what "daily bread" was, the teacher +proceeded to ask: "What do you understand by 'raiment fit,' or as we +might say, 'fit raiment?'" For a short time the class remained puzzled +at the question; but at last one little girl sung out "stockings and +shune." The child knew that "fit," was Scotch for feet, so her natural +explanation of the phrase was equivalent to "feet raiment," or +"stockings and shune," as she termed it. + +On the point of changes in religious feelings there comes within the +scope of these Reminiscences a character in Aberdeenshire, which has now +gone out--I mean the popular and universally well-received Roman +Catholic priest. Although we cannot say that Scotland is a more +PROTESTANT nation than it was in past days, still religious differences, +and strong prejudices, seem at the present time to draw a more decided +line of separation between the priest and his Protestant countrymen. As +examples of what is past, I would refer to the case of a genial Romish +bishop in Ross-shire. It is well known that private stills were +prevalent in the Highlands fifty or sixty years ago, and no one thought +there was any harm in them. This good bishop, whose name I forget, was +(as I heard the late W. Mackenzie of Muirton assure a party at Dunrobin +Castle) several years previously a famous hand at brewing a good glass +of whisky, and that he distributed his mountain-dew with a liberal and +impartial hand alike to Catholic and to Protestant friends. Of this +class, I recollect, certainly forty-five years ago, Priest Gordon, a +genuine Aberdonian, and a man beloved by all, rich and poor. He was a +sort of chaplain to Menzies of Pitfodels, and visited in all the country +families round Aberdeen. I remember once his being at Banchory Lodge, +and thus apologising to my aunt for going out of the room:--"I beg your +pardon, Mrs. Forbes, for leaving you, but I maun just gae doun to the +garden and say my bit wordies"--these "bit wordies" being in fact the +portion of the Breviary which he was bound to recite. So easily and +pleasantly were those matters then referred to. + +The following, however, is a still richer illustration, and I am assured +it is genuine:--"Towards the end of the last century, a worthy Roman +Catholic clergyman, well known as 'Priest Matheson,' and universally +respected in the district, had charge of a mission in Aberdeenshire, and +for a long time made his journeys on a piebald pony, the priest and his +'pyet shelty' sharing an affectionate recognition wherever they came. On +one occasion, however, he made his appearance on a steed of a different +description, and passing near a Seceding meeting-house, he forgathered +with the minister, who, after the usual kindly greetings, missing the +familiar pony, said, 'Ou, Priest! fat's come o' the auld Pyet? 'He's +deid, minister.' 'Weel, he was an auld faithfu' servant, and ye wad nae +doot gie him the offices o' the church?' 'Na, minister,' said his +friend, not quite liking this allusion to his priestly offices, 'I didna +dee that, for ye see he _turned Seceder afore he dee'd, an' I buried him +like a beast_.' He then rode quietly away. This worthy man, however, +could, when occasion required, rebuke with seriousness as well as point. +Always a welcome guest at the houses of both clergy and gentry, he is +said on one occasion to have met with a laird whose hospitality he had +thought it proper to decline, and on being asked the reason for the +interruption of his visits, answered, 'Ye ken, an' I ken; but, laird, +God kens!'" + +One question connected with religious feeling, and the manifestation of +religious feeling, has become a more settled point amongst us, since +fifty years have expired. I mean the question of attendance by clergymen +on theatrical representations. Dr. Carlyle had been prosecuted before +the General Assembly in 1757 for being present at the performance of the +tragedy of Douglas, written by his friend John Home. He was acquitted, +however, and writes thus on the subject in his Memoirs:-- + +"Although the clergy in Edinburgh and its neighbourhood had abstained +from the theatre because it gave offence, yet the more remote clergymen, +when occasionally in town, had almost universally attended the +play-house. It is remarkable that in the year 1784, when the great +actress Mrs. Siddons first appeared in Edinburgh, during the sitting of +the General Assembly, that court was obliged to fix all its important +business for the alternate days when she did not act, as all the younger +members, clergy as well as laity, took their stations in the theatre on +those days by three in the afternoon." + +Drs. Robertson and Blair, although they cultivated the acquaintance of +Mrs. Siddons in private, were amongst those clergymen, referred to by +Dr. Carlyle, who abstained from attendance in the theatre; but Dr. +Carlyle states that they regretted not taking the opportunity of +witnessing a display of her talent, and of giving their sanction to the +theatre as a place of recreation. Dr. Carlyle evidently considered it a +narrow-minded intolerance and bigoted fanaticism that clergymen should +be excluded from that amusement. At a period far later than 1784, the +same opinion prevailed in some quarters. I recollect when such +indulgence on the part of clergymen was treated with much leniency, +especially for Episcopalian clergy. I do not mean to say that there was +anything like a general feeling in favour of clerical theatrical +attendance; but there can be no question of a feeling far less strict +than what exists in our own time. As I have said, thirty-six years ago +some clergymen went to the theatre; and a few years before that, when my +brothers and I were passing through Edinburgh, in going backwards and +forwards to school, at Durham, with our tutor, a licentiate of the +Established Church of Scotland, and who afterwards attained considerable +eminence in the Free Church, we certainly went with him to the theatre +there, and at Durham very frequently. I feel quite assured, however, +that no clergyman could expect to retain the respect of his people or of +the public, of whom it was known that he frequently or habitually +attended theatrical representations. It is so understood. I had +opportunities of conversing with the late Mr. Murray of the Theatre +Royal, Edinburgh, and with Mr. Charles Kean, on the subject. Both +admitted the fact, and certainly if any men of the profession _could_ +have removed the feeling from the public mind, these were the men to +have done it. + +There is a phase of religious observances which has undergone a great +change amongst us within fifty years--I mean the services and +circumstances connected with the administration of the Holy Communion. +When these occurred in a parish they were called "occasions," and the +great interest excited by these sacramental solemnities may be gathered +from "Peter's Letters," "The Annals of the Parish," and Burns' "Holy +Fair." Such ceremonials are now conducted, I believe, just as the +ordinary church services. Some years back they were considered a sort of +preaching matches. Ministers vied with each other in order to bear away +the bell in popularity, and hearers embraced the opportunity of +exhibiting to one another their powers of criticism on what they heard +and saw. In the parish of Urr in Galloway, on one sacramental occasion, +some of the assistants invited were eminent ministers in Edinburgh; Dr. +Scot of St. Michael's, Dumfries, was the only local one who was asked, +and he was, in his own sphere, very popular as a preacher. A brother +clergyman, complimenting him upon the honour of being so invited, the +old bald-headed divine modestly replied, "Gude bless you, man, what can +I do? They are a' han' wailed[25] this time; I need never show face +among them." "Ye're quite mista'en," was the soothing encouragement; +"tak' your _Resurrection_ (a well-known sermon used for such occasions +by him), an I'll lay my lug ye'll beat every clute o' them." The Doctor +did as suggested, and exerted himself to the utmost, and it appears he +did not exert himself in vain. A batch of old women, on their way home +after the conclusion of the services, were overheard discussing the +merits of the several preachers who had that day addressed them from the +tent. "Leeze me abune them a'," said one of the company, who had waxed +warm in the discussion, "for yon auld clear-headed (bald) man, that +said, 'Raphael sings an' Gabriel strikes his goolden harp, an' a' the +angels clap their wings wi' joy.' O but it was gran', it just put me in +min' o' our geese at Dunjarg when they turn their nebs to the south an' +clap their wings when they see the rain's comin' after lang drooth." + +There is a subject closely allied with the religious feelings of a +people, and that is the subject of their _superstitions_. To enter upon +that question, in a general view, especially in reference to the +Highlands, would not be consistent with our present purpose, but I am +induced to mention the existence of a singular superstition regarding +swine which existed some years ago among the lower orders of the east +coast of Fife. I can observe, in my own experience, a great change to +have taken place amongst Scotch people generally on this subject. The +old aversion to the "unclean animal" still lingers in the Highlands, but +seems in the Lowland districts to have yielded to a sense of its thrift +and usefulness[26]. The account given by my correspondent of the Fife +swinophobia is as follows:-- + +Among the many superstitious notions and customs prevalent among the +lower orders of the fishing towns on the east coast of Fife, till very +recently, that class entertained a great horror of swine, and even at +the very mention of the word. If that animal crossed their path when +about to set out on a sea voyage, they considered it so unlucky an omen +that they would not venture off. A clergyman of one of these fishing +villages having mentioned the superstition to a clerical friend, and +finding that he was rather incredulous on the subject, in order to +convince him told him he would allow him an opportunity of testing the +truth of it by allowing him to preach for him the following day. It was +arranged that his friend was to read the chapter relating to the herd of +swine into which the evil spirits were cast. Accordingly, when the first +verse was read, in which the unclean beast was mentioned, a slight +commotion was observable among the audience, each one of them putting +his or her hand on any near piece of iron--a nail on the seat or +book-board, or to the nails on their shoes. At the repetition of the +word again and again, more commotion was visible, and the words "cauld +airn" (cold iron) the antidote to this baneful spell, were heard issuing +from various corners of the church. And finally, on his coming over the +hated word again, when the whole herd ran violently down the bank into +the sea, the alarmed parishioners, irritated beyond bounds, rose and all +left the church in a body. + +It is some time now, however, since the Highlanders have begun to +appreciate the thrift and comfort of swine-keeping and swine-killing. A +Scottish minister had been persuaded by the laird to keep a pig, and the +gudewife had been duly instructed in the mysteries of black puddings, +pork chops, and pig's head. "Oh!" said the minister, "nae doubt there's +a hantle o' miscellawneous eating aboot a pig." + +Amongst a people so deeply impressed with the great truths of religion, +and so earnest in their religious profession, any persons whose +principles were known to be of an _infidel_ character would naturally be +looked on with abhorrence and suspicion. There is a story traditionary +in Edinburgh regarding David Hume, which illustrates this feeling in a +very amusing manner, and which, I have heard it said, Hume himself often +narrated. The philosopher had fallen from the path into the swamp at the +back of the Castle, the existence of which I recollect hearing of from +old persons forty years ago. He fairly stuck fast, and called to a woman +who was passing, and begged her assistance. She passed on apparently +without attending to the request; at his earnest entreaty, however, she +came where he was, and asked him, "Are na ye Hume the Atheist?" "Well, +well, no matter," said Hume; "Christian charity commands you to do good +to every one." "Christian charity here, or Christian charity there," +replied the woman, "I'll do naething for you till ye turn a Christian +yoursell'--ye maun repeat the Lord's Prayer and the Creed, or faith +I'll let ye grafel[27] there as I fand ye." The historian, really afraid +for his life, rehearsed the required formulas. + +Notwithstanding the high character borne for so many years by our +countrymen as a people, and as specially attentive to all religious +observances, still there can be no doubt that there has sprung up +amongst the inhabitants of our crowded cities, wynds, and closes, a +class of persons quite unknown in the old Scottish times. It is a great, +difficulty to get them to attend divine worship at all, and their +circumstances combine to break off all associations with public +services. Their going to church becomes a matter of persuasion and of +missionary labour. + +A lady, who is most active in visiting the houses of these outcasts from +the means of grace, gives me an amusing instance of self-complacency +arising from performance of the duty. She was visiting in the West Port, +not far from the church established by my illustrious friend the late +Dr. Chalmers. Having asked a poor woman if she ever attended there for +divine service--"Ou ay," she replied; "there's a man ca'd Chalmers +preaches there, and I whiles gang in and hear him, just to encourage +him, puir body!" + +From the religious opinions of a people, the transition is natural to +their political partialities. One great political change has passed over +Scotland, which none now living can be said to have actually +_witnessed_; but they remember those who were contemporaries of the +anxious scenes of '45, and many of us have known determined and thorough +Jacobites. The poetry of that political period still remains, but we +hear only as pleasant songs those words and melodies which stirred the +hearts and excited the deep enthusiasm of a past generation. Jacobite +anecdotes also are fading from our knowledge. To many young persons they +are unknown. Of these stories illustrative of Jacobite feelings and +enthusiasm, many are of a character not fit for me to record. The good +old ladies who were violent partisans of the Stuarts had little +hesitation in referring without reserve to the future and eternal +destiny of William of Orange. One anecdote which I had from a near +relative of the family may be adduced in illustration of the powerful +hold which the cause had upon the views and consciences of Jacobites. + +A former Mr. Stirling of Keir had favoured the Stuart cause, and had in +fact attended a muster of forces at the Brig of Turk previous to the +'15. This symptom of a rising against the Government occasioned some +uneasiness, and the authorities were very active in their endeavours to +discover who were the leaders of the movement. Keir was suspected. The +miller of Keir was brought forward as a witness, and swore positively +that the laird was _not_ present. Now, as it was well known that he was +there, and that the miller knew it, a neighbour asked him privately, +when he came out of the witness-box, how he could on oath assert such a +falsehood. The miller replied, quite undaunted, and with a feeling of +confidence in the righteousness of his cause approaching the sublime--"I +would rather trust my soul in God's mercy than Keir's head into +their hands." + +A correspondent has sent me an account of a curious ebullition of +Jacobite feeling and enthusiasm, now I suppose quite extinct. My +correspondent received it himself from Alexander, fourth Duke of Gordon, +and he had entered it in a commonplace-book when he heard it, in 1826. + +"David Tulloch, tenant in Drumbenan, under the second and third Dukes +of Gordon, had been '_out_' in the '45--or the _fufteen, or both_--and +was a great favourite of his respective landlords. One day, having +attended the young Lady Susan Gordon (afterwards Duchess of Manchester) +to the 'Chapel' at Huntly, David, perceiving that her ladyship had +neither hassock nor carpet to protect her garments from the earthen +floor, respectfully spread his plaid for the young lady to kneel upon, +and the service proceeded; but when the prayer for the King and Royal +Family was commenced, David, _sans ceremonie_, drew, or rather +'twitched,' the plaid from under the knees of the astonished young lady, +exclaiming, _not_ sotto voce, 'The deil a ane shall pray for _them_ on +_my_ plaid!'" + +I have a still more pungent demonstration against praying for the king, +which a friend in Aberdeen assures me he received from the son of the +gentleman who _heard_ the protest. In the Episcopal Chapel in Aberdeen, +of which Primus _John_ Skinner was incumbent, they commenced praying in +the service for George III. immediately on the death of Prince Charles +Edward. On the first Sunday of the prayer being used, this gentleman's +father, walking home with a friend whom he knew to be an old and +determined Jacobite, said to him, "What do you think of that, Mr.----?" +The reply was, "Indeed, the less we say aboot that prayer the better." +But he was pushed for "further answer as to his own views and his own +ideas on the matter," so he came out with the declaration, "Weel, then, +I say this--they may pray the kenees[28] aff their breeks afore I join +in that prayer." + +The following is a characteristic Jacobite story. It must have happened +shortly after 1745, when all manner of devices were fallen upon to +display Jacobitism, without committing the safety of the Jacobite, such +as having white knots on gowns; drinking, "The king, ye ken wha I mean;" +uttering the toast "The king," with much apparent loyalty, and passing +the glass over the water-jug, indicating the esoteric meaning of majesty +_beyond_ the sea,--etc. etc.; and various toasts, which were most +important matters in those times, and were often given as tests of +loyalty, or the reverse, according to the company in which they were +given. Miss Carnegy of Craigo, well known and still remembered amongst +the old Montrose ladies as an uncompromising Jacobite, had been vowing +that she would drink King James and his son in a company of staunch +Brunswickers, and being strongly dissuaded from any such foolish and +dangerous attempt by some of her friends present, she answered them with +a text of Scripture, "The tongue no man can tame--James _Third_ and +_Aucht_" and drank off her glass[29]! + + + +CHAPTER THE THIRD. + +ON OLD SCOTTISH CONVIVIALITY. + +The next change in manners which has been effected, in the memory of +many now living, regards the habits of conviviality, or, to speak more +plainly, regards the banishment of _drunkenness_ from polite society. It +is indeed a most important and blessed change. But it is a change the +full extent of which many persons now alive can hardly estimate. Indeed, +it is scarcely possible to realise the scenes which took place seventy +or eighty years back, or even less. In many houses, when a party dined, +the ladies going away was the signal for the commencement of a system of +compulsory conviviality. No one was allowed to shirk--no daylight--no +heeltaps--was the wretched jargon in which were expressed the propriety +and the duty of seeing that the glass, when filled, must be emptied and +drained. We have heard of glasses having the bottoms knocked off, so +that no shuffling tricks might be played with them, and that they could +only be put down--empty. + +One cannot help looking back with amazement at the infatuation which +could for a moment tolerate such a sore evil. To a man of sober +inclinations it must have been an intolerable nuisance to join a dinner +party at many houses, where he knew he should have to witness the most +disgusting excesses in others, and to fight hard to preserve himself +from a compliance with the example of those around him. + +The scenes of excess which occurred in the houses where deep drinking +was practised must have been most revolting to sober persons who were +unaccustomed to such conviviality; as in the case of a drinking Angus +laird, entertaining as his guest a London merchant of formal manners and +temperate habits. The poor man was driven from the table when the +drinking set in hard, and stole away to take refuge in his bedroom. The +company, however, were determined not to let the worthy citizen off so +easily, but proceeded in a body, with the laird at their head, and +invaded his privacy by exhibiting bottles and glasses at his bedside, +Losing all patience, the wretched victim gasped out his +indignation--"Sir, your hospitality borders upon brutality." It must +have had a fatal influence also on many persons to whom drinking was +most injurious, and who were yet not strong-minded enough to resist the +temptations to excess. Poor James Boswell, who certainly required no +_extraordinary_ urging to take a glass too much, is found in his +letters, which have recently come to light, laying the blame of his +excesses to "falling into a habit which still prevails in Scotland;" and +then he remarks, with censorious emphasis, on the "drunken manners of +his countrymen." This was about 1770. + +A friend of mine, however, lately departed--Mr. Boswell of +Balmuto--showed more spirit than the Londoner, when he found himself in +a similar situation. Challenged by the host to drink, urged and almost +forced to swallow a quantity of wine against his own inclination, he +proposed a counter-challenge in the way of eating, and made the +following ludicrous and original proposal to the company,--that two or +three legs of mutton should be prepared, and he would then contest the +point of who could devour most meat; and certainly it seems as +reasonable to compel people to _eat_, as to compel them to drink, beyond +the natural cravings of nature. + +The situation of ladies, too, must frequently have been very +disagreeable--when, for instance, gentlemen came up stairs in a +condition most unfit for female society. Indeed they were often +compelled to fly from scenes which were most unfitting for them to +witness. They were expected to get out of the way at the proper time, or +when a hint was given them to do so. At Glasgow sixty years ago, when +the time had come for the _bowl_ to be introduced, some jovial and +thirsty members of the company proposed as a toast, "The trade of +Glasgow and _the outward bound!_" The hint was taken, and silks and +satins moved off to the drawing-room. + +In my part of the country the traditionary stories of drinking prowess +are quite marvellous. On Deeside there flourished a certain Saunders +Paul (whom I remember an old man), an innkeeper at Banchory. He was said +to have drunk whisky, glass for glass, to the claret of Mr. Maule and +the Laird of Skene for a whole evening; and in those days there was a +traditional story of his despatching, at one sitting, in company with a +character celebrated for conviviality--one of the men employed to float +rafts of timber down the Dee--three dozen of porter. Of this Mr. Paul it +was recorded, that on being asked if he considered porter as a wholesome +beverage, he replied, "Oh yes, if you don't take above a dozen." +Saunders Paul was, as I have said, the innkeeper at Banchory: his friend +and _porter_ companion was drowned in the Dee, and when told that the +body had been found down the stream below Crathes, he coolly remarked, +"I am surprised at that, for I never kenn'd him pass the inn before +without comin' in for a glass." + +Some relatives of mine travelling in the Highlands were amused by +observing in a small road-side public-house a party drinking, whose +apparatus for conviviality called forth the dry quaint humour which is +so thoroughly Scottish. Three drovers had met together, and were +celebrating their meeting by a liberal consumption of whisky; the inn +could only furnish one glass without a bottom, and this the party passed +on from one to another. A queer-looking pawky chield, whenever the glass +came to his turn, remarked most gravely, "I think we wadna be the waur +o' some water," taking care, however, never to add any of the simple +element, but quietly drank off his glass. + +There was a sort of infatuation in the supposed dignity and manliness +attached to powers of deep potation, and the fatal effects of drinking +were spoken of in a manner both reckless and unfeeling. Thus, I have +been assured that a well-known old laird of the old school expressed +himself with great indignation at the charge brought against hard +drinking that it had actually _killed_ people. "Na, na, I never knew +onybody killed wi' drinking, but I hae kenn'd some that dee'd in the +training." A positive _eclat_ was attached to the accomplished and +well-trained consumer of claret or of whisky toddy, which gave an +importance and even merit to the practice of drinking, and which had a +most injurious effect. I am afraid some of the Pleydells of the old +school would have looked with the most ineffable contempt on the +degeneracy of the present generation in this respect, and that the +temperance movement would be little short of insanity in their eyes; and +this leads me to a remark.--In considering this portion of the subject, +we should bear in mind a distinction. The change we now speak of +involves more than a mere change of a custom or practice in social life. +It is a change in men's sentiments and feelings on a certain great +question of morals. Except we enter into this distinction we cannot +appreciate the extent of the change which has really taken place in +regard to intemperate habits. + +I have an anecdote from a descendant of Principal Robertson, of an +address made to him, which showed the real importance attached to all +that concerned the system of drinking in his time. The Principal had +been invited to spend some days in a country-house, and the minister of +the parish (a jovial character) had been asked to meet him. Before +dinner he went up to Dr. Robertson and addressed him +confidentially--"Doctor, I understand ye are a brother of my gude freend +Peter Robertson of Edinburgh, therefore I'll gie you a piece of +advice,--Bend[30] weel to the Madeira at dinner, for here ye'll get +little o't after." I have known persons who held that a man who could +not drink must have a degree of feebleness and imbecility of character. +But as this is an important point, I will adduce the higher authority of +Lord Cockburn, and quote from him two examples, very different certainly +in their nature, but both bearing upon the question. I refer to what he +says of Lord Hermand:--"With Hermand drinking was a virtue; he had a +sincere respect for drinking, indeed a high moral approbation, and a +serious compassion for the poor wretches who _could_ not indulge in it, +and with due contempt of those who could but did not;" and, secondly, I +refer to Lord Cockburn's pages for an anecdote which illustrates the +perverted feeling I refer to, now happily no longer existing. It +relates the opinion expressed by an old drunken writer of Selkirk (whose +name is not mentioned) regarding his anticipation of professional +success for Mr. Cranstoun, afterwards Lord Corehouse. Sir Walter Scott, +William Erskine, and Cranstoun, had dined with this Selkirk writer, and +Scott--of hardy, strong, and healthy frame--had matched the writer +himself in the matter of whisky punch. Poor Cranstoun, of refined and +delicate mental and bodily temperament, was a bad hand at such work, and +was soon off the field. On the party breaking up, the Selkirk writer +expressed his admiration of Scott, assuring him that _he_ would rise +high in the profession, and adding: "I'll tell ye what, Maister Walter, +that lad Cranstoun may get to the tap o' the bar, if he can; but tak my +word for't, it's no be by drinking." + +There was a sort of dogged tone of apology for excess in drinking, which +marked the hold which the practice had gained on ordinary minds. Of this +we have a remarkable example in the unwilling testimony of a witness who +was examined as to the fact of drunkenness being charged against a +minister. The person examined was beadle, or one of the church +officials. He was asked, "Did you ever see the minister the worse of +drink?" "I canna say I've seen him the waur o' drink, but nae doubt I've +seen him the _better_ o't," was the evasive answer. The question, +however, was pushed further; and when he was urged to say if this state +of being "the better for drink" ever extended to a condition of absolute +helpless intoxication, the reply was: "Indeed, afore that cam', I was +blind fou mysel', and I could see nae thing." + +A legal friend has told me of a celebrated circuit where Lord Hermand +was judge, and Clephane depute-advocate. The party got drunk at Ayr, and +so continued (although quite able for their work) till the business was +concluded at Jedburgh. Some years after, my informant heard that this +circuit had, at Jedburgh, acquired the permanent name of the +"_daft_ circuit." + +Lord Cockburn was fond of describing a circuit scene at Stirling, in his +early days at the bar, under the presidency of his friend and connection +Lord Hermand. After the circuit dinner, and when drinking had gone on +for some time, young Cockburn observed places becoming vacant in the +social circle, but no one going out at the door. He found that the +individuals had dropped down under the table. He took the hint, and by +this ruse retired from the scene. He lay quiet till the beams of the +morning sun penetrated the apartment. The judge and some of his staunch +friends coolly walked up stairs, washed their hands and faces, came down +to breakfast, and went into court quite fresh and fit for work. + +The feeling of importance frequently attached to powers of drinking was +formally attested by a well-known western baronet of convivial habits +and convivial memory. He was desirous of bearing testimony to the +probity, honour, and other high moral qualities of a friend whom he +wished to commend. Having fully stated these claims to consideration and +respect, he deemed it proper to notice also his _convivial_ attainments: +he added accordingly, with cautious approval on so important a +point--"And he is a fair drinker[31]." + +The following anecdote is an amusing example of Scottish servant humour +and acuteness in measuring the extent of consumption by a convivial +party in Forfarshire. The party had met at a farmer's house not far from +Arbroath, to celebrate the reconciliation of two neighbouring farmers +who had long been at enmity. The host was pressing and hospitable; the +party sat late, and consumed a vast amount of whisky toddy. The wife was +penurious, and grudged the outlay. When at last, at a morning hour, the +party dispersed, the lady, who had not slept in her anxiety, looked over +the stairs and eagerly asked the servant girl, "How many bottles of +whisky have they used, Betty?" The lass, who had not to pay for the +whisky, but had been obliged to go to the well to fetch the water for +the toddy, coolly answered, "I dinna ken, mem, but they've drucken sax +gang o' water." + +We cannot imagine a better illustration of the general habits that +prevailed in Scottish society in regard to drinking about the time we +speak of than one which occurs in the recently-published "Memoirs of a +Banking House," that of the late Sir William Forbes, Bart, of Pitsligo. +The book comprises much that is interesting to the family, and to +Scotchmen. It contains a pregnant hint as to the manners of polite +society and business habits in those days. Of John Coutts, one of four +brothers connected with the house, Sir William records how he was "more +correct in his conduct than the others; so much so, that Sir William +_never but once_ saw him in the counting-house disguised with liquor, +and incapable of transacting business." + +In the Highlands this sort of feeling extended to an almost incredible +extent, even so much as to obscure the moral and religious sentiments. +Of this a striking proof was afforded in a circumstance which took place +in my own church soon after I came into it. One of our Gaelic clergy had +so far forgotten himself as to appear in the church somewhat the worse +of liquor. This having happened so often as to come to the ears of the +bishop, he suspended him from the performance of divine service. Against +this decision the people were a little disposed to rebel, because, +according to their Highland notions, "a gentleman was no the waur for +being able to tak' a gude glass o' whisky." These were the notions of a +people in whose eyes the power of swallowing whisky conferred +distinction, and with whom inability to take the fitting quantity was a +mark of a mean and futile character. Sad to tell, the funeral rites of +Highland chieftains were not supposed to have been duly celebrated +except there was an immoderate and often fatal consumption of whisky. It +has been related that at the last funeral in the Highlands, conducted +according to the traditions of the olden times, several of the guests +fell victims to the usage, and actually died of the excesses. + +This phase of old and happily almost obsolete Scottish intemperance at +funeral solemnities must have been peculiarly revolting. Instances of +this horrid practice being carried to a great extent are traditionary in +every part of the country. I am assured of the truth of the following +anecdote by a son of the gentleman who acted as chief mourner on the +occasion:--About seventy years ago an old maiden lady died in +Strathspey. Just previous to her death she sent for her grand-nephew, +and said to him, "Wily, I'm deein', and as ye'll hae the charge o' a' I +have, mind now that as much whisky is to be used at my funeral as there +was at my baptism." Willy neglected to ask the old lady what the +quantity of whisky used at the baptism was, but when the day of the +funeral arrived believed her orders would be best fulfilled by allowing +each guest to drink as much as he pleased. The churchyard where the body +was to be deposited was about ten miles distant from where the death +occurred. It was a short day in November, and when the funeral party +came to the churchyard the shades of night had considerably closed in. +The grave-digger, whose patience had been exhausted in waiting, was not +in the least willing to accept of Captain G----'s (the chief mourner) +apology for delay. After looking about him he put the anxious question, +"But, Captain, whaur's Miss Ketty?" The reply was, "In her coffin, to be +sure, and get it into the earth as fast as you can." There, however, was +no coffin; the procession had sojourned at a country inn by the way--had +rested the body on a dyke--started without it--and had to postpone the +interment until next day. My correspondent very justly adds the remark, +"What would be thought of indulgence in drinking habits now that could +lead to such a result?" + +Many scenes of a similar incongruous character are still traditionally +connected with such occasions. Within the last thirty years, a laird of +Dundonald, a small estate in Ross-shire, died at Inverness. There was +open house for some days, and great eating and drinking. Here the corpse +commenced its progress toward its appointed home on the coast, and +people followed in multitudes to give it a partial convoy, all of whom +had to be entertained. It took altogether a fortnight to bury poor +Dundonald, and great expense must have been incurred. This, however, is +looked back to at Inverness as the last of the real grand old Highland +funerals. Such notions of what is due to the memory of the departed have +now become unusual if not obsolete. I myself witnessed the first decided +change in this matter. I officiated at the funeral of the late Duke of +Sutherland. The procession was a mile long. Refreshments were provided +for 7000 persons; beef, bread, and beer; but not one glass of whisky was +allowed on the property that day! + +It may, perhaps, be said that the change we speak of is not peculiar to +Scotland; that in England the same change has been apparent; and that +drunkenness has passed away in the higher circles, as a matter of +course, as refinement and taste made an advancement in society. This is +true. But there were some features of the question which were peculiar +to Scotland, and which at one time rendered it less probable that +intemperance would give way in the north. It seemed in some quarters to +have taken deeper root amongst us. The system of pressing, or of +_compelling_, guests to drink seemed more inveterate. Nothing can more +powerfully illustrate the deep-rooted character of intemperate habits in +families than an anecdote which was related to me, as coming from the +late Mr. Mackenzie, author of the _Man of Feeling_. He had been involved +in a regular drinking party. He was keeping as free from the usual +excesses as he was able, and as he marked companions around him falling +victims to the power of drink, he himself dropped off under the table +among the slain, as a measure of precaution; and lying there, his +attention was called to a small pair of hands working at his throat; on +asking what it was, a voice replied, "Sir, I'm the lad that's to lowse +the neckcloths." Here, then, was a family, where, on drinking +occasions, it was the appointed duty of one of the household to attend, +and, when the guests where becoming helpless, to untie their cravats in +fear of apoplexy or suffocation[32]. We ought certainly to be grateful +for the change which has taken place from such a system; for this change +has made a great revolution in Scottish social life. The charm and the +romance long attached in the minds of some of our countrymen to the +whole system and concerns of hard drinking was indeed most lamentable +and absurd. At tavern suppers, where, nine times out often, it was the +express _object_ of those who went to get drunk, such stuff as "regal +purple stream," "rosy wine," "quaffing the goblet," "bright sparkling +nectar," "chasing the rosy hours," and so on, tended to keep up the +delusion, and make it a monstrous fine thing for men to sit up drinking +half the night, to have frightful headaches all next day, to make +maudlin idiots of themselves as they were going home, and to become +brutes amongst their family when they arrived. And here I may introduce +the mention of a practice connected with the convivial habits of which +we have been speaking, but which has for some time passed away, at least +from private tables--I mean the absurd system of calling for toasts and +sentiments each time the glasses were filled. During dinner not a drop +could be touched, except in conjunction with others, and with each +drinking to the health of each. But toasts came _after_ dinner. I can +just remember the practice in partial operation; and my astonishment as +a mere boy, when accidentally dining at table and hearing my mother +called upon to "give the company a gentleman," is one of my earliest +reminiscences. Lord Cockburn must have remembered them well, and I will +quote his most amusing account of the effects:--"After dinner, and +before the ladies retired, there generally began what was called +'_Rounds_' of toasts, when each gentleman named an absent lady, and each +lady an absent gentleman, separately; or one person was required to give +an absent lady, and another person was required to match a gentleman +with that lady, and the persons named were toasted, generally, with +allusions and jokes about the fitness of the union. And, worst of all, +there were 'Sentiments.' These were short epigrammatic sentences, +expressive of moral feelings and virtues, and were thought refined and +elegant productions. A faint conception of their nauseousness may be +formed from the following examples, every one of which I have heard +given a thousand times, and which indeed I only recollect from their +being favourites. The glasses being filled, a person was asked for his +or for her sentiment, when this, or something similar, was +committed:--'May the pleasures of the evening bear the reflections of +the morning;' or, 'may the friends of our youth be the companions of our +old age;' or, 'delicate pleasures to susceptible minds;' 'may the honest +heart never feel distress;' 'may the hand of charity wipe the tear from +the eye of sorrow.' The conceited, the ready, or the reckless, hackneyed +in the art, had a knack of making new sentiments applicable to the +passing incidents with great ease. But it was a dreadful oppression on +the timid or the awkward. They used to shudder, ladies particularly; for +nobody was spared when their turn in the _round_ approached. Many a +struggle and blush did it cost; but this seemed only to excite the +tyranny of the masters of the craft; and compliance could never be +avoided, except by more torture than yielding.... It is difficult for +those who have been under a more natural system to comprehend how a +sensible man, a respectable matron, a worthy old maid, and especially a +girl, could be expected to go into company easily, on such +conditions[33]." + +This accompaniment of domestic drinking by a toast or sentiment--the +practice of which is now confined to public entertainments--was then +invariable in private parties, and was supposed to enliven and promote +the good fellowship of the social circle. Thus Fergusson, in one of his +poems, in describing a dinner, says-- + + "The grace is said; it's nae ower lang, + The claret reams in bells. + Quo' Deacon, 'Let the toast round gang; + Come, here's our noble sels + Weel met the day.'" + +There was a great variety of these toasts, some of them exclusively +Scottish. A correspondent has favoured me with a few reminiscences of +such incentives to inebriety. + +The ordinary form of drinking a health was in the address, "Here's t' +ye." + +Then such as the following were named by successive members of the +company at the call of the host:-- + + _The land o' cakes_ (Scotland). + _Mair freens and less need o' them. + Thumping luck and fat weans_. + + _When we're gaun up the hill o' fortune may we ne'er + meet a freen' coming doun. + May ne'er waur be amang us. + May the hinges o' freendship never rust, or the wings o' + luve lose a feather. + Here's to them that lo'es us, or lenns us a lift. + Here's health to the sick, stilts to the lame; claise to + the back, and brose to the wame. + Here's health, wealth, wit, and meal. + The deil rock them in a creel that does na' wish us a' + weel. + Horny hands and weather-beaten haffets (cheeks). + The rending o' rocks and the pu'in' doun o' auld + houses_. + +The above two belong to the mason craft; the first implies a wish for +plenty of work, and health to do it; the second, to erect new buildings +and clear away old ones. + + _May the winds o' adversity ne'er blaw open our door. + May poortith ne'er throw us in the dirt, or gowd into + the high saddle[34]. + May the mouse ne'er leave our meal-pock wi' the tear + in its e'e. + Blythe may we a' be. + Ill may we never see. + Breeks and brochan (brose). + May we ne'er want a freend, or a drappie to gie him. + Gude een to you a', an' tak your nappy. + A willy-waught's a gude night cappy[35]. + May we a' be canty an' cosy, + An' ilk hae a wife in his bosy_. + _A cosy but, and a canty ben, + To couthie[36] women and trusty men. + The ingle neuk wi' routh[37] o' bannoch and bairns. + Here's to him wha winna beguile ye. + Mair sense and mair siller. + Horn, corn, wool, an' yarn[38]_. + +Sometimes certain toasts were accompanied by _Highland_ honours. This +was a very exciting, and to a stranger a somewhat alarming, proceeding. +I recollect my astonishment the first time I witnessed the ceremony--the +company, from sitting quietly drinking their wine, seemed to assume the +attitude of harmless maniacs, allowed to amuse themselves. The moment +the toast was given, and proposed to be drunk with Highland honours, the +gentlemen all rose, and with one foot on their chair and another on the +_table_, they drank the toast with Gaelic shrieks, which were awful to +hear, the cheering being under the direction of a toast-master appointed +to direct the proceedings. I am indebted to the kindness of the Rev. +Duncan Campbell, the esteemed minister of Moulin, for the form used on +such occasions. Here it is in the Gaelic and the Saxon:-- + +_Gaelic._ + +So! Nish! Nish! Sud ris! Sud ris! Thig ris! Thig ris! A on uair eile! + +_Translation._ + +Prepare! Now! Now! Yon again! Yon again! At it again! At it again! +Another time, or one cheer more! + +The reader is to imagine these words uttered with yells and +vociferations, and accompanied with frantic gestures. + +The system of giving toasts was so regularly established, that +collections of them were published to add brilliancy to the festive +board. By the kindness of the librarian, I have seen a little volume +which is in the Signet Library of Edinburgh. It is entitled, "The +Gentleman's New Bottle Companion," Edinburgh, printed in the year +MDCCLXXVII. It contains various toasts and sentiments which the writer +considered to be suitable to such occasions. Of the taste and decency of +the companies where some of them could be made use of, the less said +the better. + +I have heard also of large traditionary collections of toasts and +sentiments, belonging to old clubs and societies, extending back above a +century, but I have not seen any of them, and I believe my readers will +think they have had quite enough. + +The favourable reaction which has taken place in regard to the whole +system of intemperance may very fairly, in the first place, be referred +to an improved _moral_ feeling. But other causes have also assisted; and +it is curious to observe how the different changes in the modes of +society bear upon one another. The alteration in the convivial habits +which we are noticing in our own country may be partly due to alteration +of hours. The old plan of early dining favoured a system of suppers, and +after supper was a great time for convivial songs and sentiments. This +of course induced drinking to a late hour. Most drinking songs imply the +night as the season of conviviality--thus in a popular madrigal:-- + + "By the gaily circling glass + We can tell how minutes pass; + By the hollow cask we're told + How the waning _night_ grows old." + +And Burns thus marks the time:-- + + "It is the moon, I ken her horn, + That's blinkin' in the lift sae hie; + She shines sae bright, to wyle us hame, + But by my sooth she'll wait a wee." + +The young people of the present day have no idea of the state of matters +in regard to the supper system when it was the normal condition of +society. The late dining hours may make the social circle more formal, +but they have been far less favourable to drinking propensities. After +such dinners as ours are now, suppers are clearly out of the question. +One is astonished to look back and recall the scenes to which were +attached associations of hilarity, conviviality, and enjoyment. Drinking +parties were protracted beyond the whole Sunday, having begun by a +dinner on Saturday; imbecility and prostrate helplessness were a common +result of these bright and jovial scenes; and by what perversion of +language, or by what obliquity of sentiment, the notions of pleasure +could be attached to scenes of such excess--to the nausea, the disgust +of sated appetite, and the racking headache--it is not easy to explain. +There were men of heads so hard, and of stomachs so insensible, that, +like my friend Saunders Paul, they could stand anything in the way of +drink. But to men in general, and to the more delicate constitutions, +such a life must have been a cause of great misery. To a certain extent, +and up to a certain point, wine may be a refreshment and a wholesome +stimulant; nay, it is a medicine, and a valuable one, and as such, comes +recommended on fitting occasions by the physician. _Beyond_ this point, +as sanctioned and approved by nature, the use of wine is only +degradation. Well did the sacred writer call wine, when thus taken in +excess, "a mocker." It makes all men equal, because it makes them all +idiotic. It allures them into a vicious indulgence, and then mocks their +folly, by depriving them of any sense they may ever have possessed. + +It has, I fear, been injurious to the cause of temperance, that emotions +of true friendship, and the outpouring of human affections, should so +frequently be connected with the obligation that the parties should _get +drunk together_. Drunkenness is thus made to hold too close an +association in men's minds with some of the best and finest feelings of +their nature. + + "Friend of my soul, this goblet sip," + +is the constant acknowledged strain of poetical friendship: our own +Robert Burns calls upon the dear companion of his early happy days, with +whom he had "paidl't i' the burn, frae mornin' sun till dine," and +between whom "braid seas had roar'd sin auld lang syne," to commemorate +their union of heart and spirit, and to welcome their meeting after +years of separation, by each one joining his pint-stoup, and by each +taking a mutual "richt guid willie-waught," in honour of the innocent +and happy times of "auld lang syne." David marks his recognition of +friendship by tokens of a different character--"We took sweet counsel +together, and walked _in the house of God_ as friends."--Ps. lv. 14. + +Reference has already been made to Lord Hermand's opinion of drinking, +and to the high estimation in which he held a staunch drinker, according +to the testimony of Lord Cockburn, There is a remarkable corroboration +of this opinion in a current anecdote which is traditionary regarding +the same learned judge. A case of some great offence was tried before +him, and the counsel pleaded extenuation for his client in that he was +_drunk_ when he committed the offence. "Drunk!" exclaimed Lord Hermand, +in great indignation; "if he could do such a thing when he was drunk, +what might he not have done when he was _sober!_" evidently implying +that the normal condition of human nature, and its most hopeful one, was +a condition of intoxication. + +Of the prevalence of hard drinking in certain houses as a system, a +remarkable proof is given at page 102. The following anecdote still +further illustrates the subject, and corresponds exactly with the story +of the "loosing the cravats," which was performed for guests in a state +of helpless inebriety by one of the household. There had been a +carousing party at Castle Grant, many years ago, and as the evening +advanced towards morning two Highlanders were in attendance to carry the +guests up stairs, it being understood that none could by any other means +arrive at their sleeping apartments. One or two of the guests, however, +whether from their abstinence or their superior strength of head, were +walking up stairs, and declined the proffered assistance. The attendants +were quite astonished, and indignantly exclaimed, "Agh, it's sare +cheenged times at Castle Grant, when shentlemens can gang to bed on +their ain feet." + +There was a practice in many Scottish houses which favoured most +injuriously the national tendency to spirit-drinking, and that was a +foolish and inconsiderate custom of offering a glass on all occasions as +a mark of kindness or hospitality. I mention the custom only for the +purpose of offering a remonstrance. It should never be done. Even now, I +am assured, small jobs (carpenters' or blacksmiths', or such like) are +constantly remunerated in the West Highlands of Scotland--and doubtless +in many other parts of the country--not by a pecuniary payment, but by a +_dram_; if the said dram be taken from a _speerit_-decanter out of the +family press or cupboard, the compliment is esteemed the greater, and +the offering doubly valued. + +A very amusing dialogue between a landlord and his tenant on this +question of the dram has been sent to me. John Colquhoun, an aged +Dumbartonshire tenant, is asked by his laird on Lochlomond side, to stay +a minute till he _tastes_. "Now, John," says the laird. "Only half a +glass, Camstraddale," meekly pleads John. "Which half?" rejoins the +laird, "the upper or the lower?" John grins, and turns off _both_--_the +upper and lower_ too. + +The upper and lower portions of the glass furnish another drinking +anecdote. A very greedy old lady employed another John Colquhoun to cut +the grass upon the lawn, and enjoined him to cut it very close, adding, +as a reason for the injunction, that one inch at the bottom was worth +two at the top. Having finished his work much to her satisfaction, the +old lady got out the whisky-bottle and a tapering wineglass, which she +filled about half full; John suggested that it would be better to fill +it up, slily adding, "Fill it up, mem, for it's no like the gress; an +inch at the tap's worth twa at the boddom." + +But the most whimsical anecdote connected with the subject of drink, is +one traditionary in the south of Scotland, regarding an old Gallovidian +lady disclaiming more drink under the following circumstances:--The old +generation of Galloway lairds were a primitive and hospitable race, but +their conviviality sometimes led to awkward occurrences. In former days, +when roads were bad and wheeled vehicles almost unknown, an old laird +was returning from a supper party, with his lady mounted behind him on +horseback. On crossing the river Urr, at a ford at a point where it +joins the sea, the old lady dropped off, but was not missed till her +husband reached his door, when, of course, there was an immediate search +made. The party who were despatched in quest of her arrived just in time +to find her remonstrating with the advancing tide, which trickled into +her mouth, in these words, "No anither drap; neither het nor cauld." + +A lady, on one occasion, offering a dram to a porter in a rather small +glass, said, "Take it off; it will do you no harm," on which the man, +looking at the diminutive glass, observed, "Harm! Na, gin it were +poushon" (poison). + +I would now introduce, as a perfect illustration of this portion of our +subject, two descriptions of clergymen, well known men in their day, +which are taken from Dr. Carlyle's work, already referred to. Of Dr. +Alexander Webster, a clergyman, and one of his contemporaries, he writes +thus:--"Webster, leader of the high-flying party, had justly obtained +much respect amongst the clergy, and all ranks indeed, for having +established the Widows' Fund.... His appearance of great strictness in +religion, to which he was bred under his father, who was a very popular +minister of the Tolbooth Church, not acting in restraint of his +convivial humour, he was held to be excellent company even by those of +dissolute manners; while, being a five-bottle man, he could lay them all +under the table. This had brought on him the nickname of Dr. Bonum +Magnum in the time of faction. But never being indecently the worse of +liquor, and a love of claret, to any degree, not being reckoned in those +days a sin in Scotland, all his excesses were pardoned." + +Dr. Patrick Cumming, also a clergyman and a contemporary, he describes +in the following terms:--"Dr. Patrick Cumming was, at this time (1751), +at the head of the moderate interest, and had his temper been equal to +his talents, might have kept it long, for he had both learning and +sagacity, and very agreeable conversation, _with a constitution able to +bear the conviviality of the times._" + +Now, of all the anecdotes and facts which I have collected, or of all +which I have ever heard to illustrate the state of Scottish society in +the past times, as regards its habits of intemperance, this assuredly +surpasses them all.--Of two well-known, distinguished, and leading +clergymen in the middle of the eighteenth century, one who had "obtained +much respect," and "had the appearance of great strictness in religion," +is described as an enormous drinker of claret; the other, an able leader +of a powerful section in the church, is described as _owing_ his +influence to his power of meeting the conviviality of the times. Suppose +for a moment a future biographer should write in this strain of eminent +divines, and should apply to distinguished members of the Scottish +Church in 1863 such description as the following:--"Dr. ---- was a man +who took a leading part in all church affairs at this time, and was much +looked up to by the evangelical section of the General Assembly; he +could always carry off without difficulty his five bottles of claret. +Dr. ---- had great influence in society, and led the opposite party in +the General Assembly, as he could take his place in all companies, and +drink on fair terms at the most convivial tables!!" Why, this seems to +us so monstrous, that we can scarcely believe Dr. Carlyle's account of +matters in his day to be possible. + +There is a story which illustrates, with terrible force, the power +which drinking had obtained in Scottish social life. I have been +deterred from bringing it forward, as too shocking for production. But +as the story is pretty well known, and its truth vouched for on high +authority, I venture to give it, as affording a proof that, in those +days, no consideration, not even the most awful that affects human +nature, could be made to outweigh the claims of a determined +conviviality. It may, I think, be mentioned also, in the way of warning +men generally against the hardening and demoralising effects of habitual +drunkenness. The story is this:--At a prolonged drinking bout, one of +the party remarked, "What gars the laird of Garskadden look sae +gash[39]?" "Ou," says his neighbour, the laird of Kilmardinny, "deil +meane him! Garskadden's been wi' his Maker these twa hours; I saw him +step awa, but I didna like to disturb gude company[40]!" + +Before closing this subject of excess in _drinking_, I may refer to +another indulgence in which our countrymen are generally supposed to +partake more largely than their neighbours:--I mean snuff-taking. The +popular southern ideas of a Scotchman and his snuff-box are inseparable. +Smoking does not appear to have been practised more in Scotland than in +England, and if Scotchmen are sometimes intemperate in the use of snuff, +it is certainly a more innocent excess than intemperance in whisky. I +recollect, amongst the common people in the north, a mode of taking +snuff which showed a determination to make the _most_ of it, and which +indicated somewhat of intemperance in the enjoyment; this was to receive +it not through a pinch between the fingers, but through a quill or +little bone ladle, which forced it up the nose. But, besides smoking and +snuffing, I have a reminiscence of a _third_ use of tobacco, which I +apprehend is now quite obsolete. Some of my readers will be surprised +when I name this forgotten luxury. It was called _plugging_, and +consisted _(horresco referens_) in poking a piece of pigtail tobacco +right into the nostril. I remember this distinctly; and now, at a +distance of more than sixty years, I recall my utter astonishment as a +boy, at seeing my grand-uncle, with whom I lived in early days, put a +thin piece of tobacco fairly up his nose. I suppose the plug acted as a +continued stimulant on the olfactory nerve, and was, in short, like +taking a perpetual pinch of snuff. + +The inveterate snuff-taker, like the dram-drinker, felt severely the +being deprived of his accustomed stimulant, as in the following +instance:--A severe snow-storm in the Highlands, which lasted for +several weeks, having stopped all communication betwixt neighbouring +hamlets, the snuff-boxes were soon reduced to their last pinch. +Borrowing and begging from all the neighbours within reach were first +resorted to, but when these failed, all were alike reduced to the +longing which unwillingly-abstinent snuff-takers alone know. The +minister of the parish was amongst the unhappy number; the craving was +so intense that study was out of the question, and he became quite +restless. As a last resort the beadle was despatched, through the snow, +to a neighbouring glen, in the hope of getting a supply; but he came +back as unsuccessful as he went. "What's to be dune, John?" was the +minister's pathetic inquiry. John shook his head, as much as to say that +he could not tell; but immediately thereafter started up, as if a new +idea had occurred to him. He came back in a few minutes, crying, "Hae!" +The minister, too eager to be scrutinising, took a long, deep pinch, and +then said, "Whaur did you get it?" "I soupit[41] the poupit," was John's +expressive reply. The minister's accumulated superfluous Sabbath snuff +now came into good use. + +It does not appear that at this time a similar excess in _eating_ +accompanied this prevalent tendency to excess in drinking. Scottish +tables were at that period plain and abundant, but epicurism or gluttony +do not seem to have been handmaids to drunkenness. A humorous anecdote, +however, of a full-eating laird, may well accompany those which +appertain to the _drinking_ lairds.--A lady in the north having watched +the proceedings of a guest, who ate long and largely, she ordered the +servant to take away, as he had at last laid down his knife and fork. To +her surprise, however, he resumed his work, and she apologised to him, +saying, "I thought, Mr. ----, you had done." + +"Oh, so I had, mem; but I just fan' a doo in the _redd_ o' my plate." He +had discovered a pigeon lurking amongst the bones and refuse of his +plate, and could not resist finishing it. + +FOOTNOTES: + +[19] Distinguished examples of these are to be found in the Old +Greyfriars' Church, Edinburgh, and in the Cathedral of Glasgow; to say +nothing of the beautiful specimens in St. John's Episcopal Church, +Edinburgh. + +[20] "This was a square enclosure in the Greyfriars' Churchyard, guarded +on one side by a veteran angel without a nose, and having only one wing, +who had the merit of having maintained his post for a century, while his +comrade cherub, who had stood sentinel on the corresponding pedestal, +lay a broken trunk, among the hemlock, burdock, and nettles, which grew +in gigantic luxuriance around the walls of the mausoleum." + +[21] A Shetland pony. + +[22] The Lord's Supper. + +[23] Bullock. + +[24] Perhaps. + +[25] Carefully selected. + +[26] I recollect an old Scottish gentleman, who shared this horror, +asking very gravely, "Were not swine forbidden under the law, and cursed +under the gospel?" + +[27] Lie in a grovelling attitude. See Jamieson. + +[28] So pronounced in Aberdeen. + +[29] Implying that there was a James Third of England, Eighth of +Scotland. + +[30] Old Scotch for "drink hard". + +[31] A friend learned in Scottish history suggests an ingenious remark, +that this might mean more than a mere _full drinker_. To drink "fair," +used to imply that the person drank in the same proportion as the +company; to drink more would be unmannerly; to drink less might imply +some unfair motive. Either interpretation shows the importance attached +to drinking and all that concerned it. + +[32] In Burt's _Letters from the North of Scotland_, written about 1730, +similar scenes are related as occurring in Culloden House: as the +company were disabled by drink, two servants in waiting took up the +invalids with short poles in their chairs as they sat (if not fallen +down), and carried them off to their beds. + +[33] Lord Cockburn's _Memorials of his Time_, p. 37, _et seq_. + +[34] May we never be cast down by adversity, or unduly elevated by +prosperity. + +[35] A toast at parting or breaking up of the party. + +[36] Loving + +[37] Plenty + +[38] Toast for agricultural dinners + +[39] Ghastly. + +[40] The scene is described and place mentioned in Dr. Strang's account +of Glasgow Clubs, p. 104, 2d edit. + +[41] Swept. + + + +CHAPTER THE FOURTH. + +ON THE OLD SCOTTISH DOMESTIC SERVANT. + +I come now to a subject on which a great change has taken place in this +country during my own experience--viz. those peculiarities of +intercourse which some years back marked the connection between masters +and servants. In many Scottish houses a great familiarity prevailed +between members of the family and the domestics. For this many reasons +might have been assigned. Indeed, when we consider the simple modes of +life, which discarded the ideas of ceremony or etiquette; the retired +and uniform style of living, which afforded few opportunities for any +change in the domestic arrangements; and when we add to these a free, +unrestrained, unformal, and natural style of intercommunion, which seems +rather a national characteristic, we need not be surprised to find in +quiet Scottish families a sort of intercourse with old domestics which +can hardly be looked for at a time when habits are so changed, and where +much of the quiet eccentricity belonging to us as a national +characteristic is almost necessarily softened down or driven out. Many +circumstances conspired to promote familiarity with old domestics, which +are now entirely changed. We take the case of a domestic coming early +into service, and passing year after year in the same family. The +servant grows up into old age and confirmed habits when the laird is +becoming a man, a husband, father of a family. The domestic cannot +forget the days when his master was a child, riding on his back, +applying to him for help in difficulties about his fishing, his rabbits, +his pony, his going to school. All the family know how attached he is; +nobody likes to speak harshly to him. He is a privileged man. The +faithful old servant of thirty, forty, or fifty years, if with a +tendency to be jealous, cross, and interfering, becomes a great trouble. +Still the relative position was the result of good feelings. If the +familiarity sometimes became a nuisance, it was a wholesome nuisance, +and relic of a simpler time gone by. But the case of the old servant, +whether agreeable or troublesome, was often so fixed and established in +the households of past days, that there was scarce a possibility of +getting away from it. The well-known story of the answer of one of these +domestic tyrants to the irritated master, who was making an effort to +free himself from the thraldom, shows the idea entertained, by _one_ of +the parties at least, of the permanency of the tenure. I am assured by a +friend that the true edition of the story was this:--An old Mr. Erskine +of Dun had one of these retainers, under whose language and unreasonable +assumption he had long groaned. He had almost determined to bear it no +longer, when, walking out with his man, on crossing a field, the master +exclaimed, "There's a hare." Andrew looked at the place, and coolly +replied, "What a big lee, it's a cauff." The master, quite angry now, +plainly told the old domestic that they _must_ part. But the tried +servant of forty years, not dreaming of the possibility of _his_ +dismissal, innocently asked, "Ay, sir; whare ye gaun? I'm sure ye're aye +best at hame;" supposing that, if there were to be any disruption, it +must be the master who would change the place. An example of a similar +fixedness of tenure in an old servant was afforded in an anecdote +related of an old coachman long in the service of a noble lady, and who +gave all the trouble and annoyance which he conceived were the +privileges of his position in the family. At last the lady fairly gave +him notice to quit, and told him he must go. The only satisfaction she +got was the quiet answer, "Na, na, my lady; I druve ye to your marriage, +and I shall stay to drive ye to your burial." Indeed, we have heard of a +still stronger assertion of his official position by one who met an +order to quit his master's service by the cool reply, "Na, na; I'm no +gangin'. If ye dinna ken whan ye've a gude servant; I ken whan I've a +gude place." + +It is but fair, however, to give an anecdote in which the master and the +servant's position was _reversed_, in regard to a wish for change:--An +old servant of a relation of my own with an ungovernable temper, became +at last so weary of his master's irascibility, that he declared he must +leave, and gave as his reason the fits of anger which came on, and +produced such great annoyance that he could not stand it any longer. His +master, unwilling to lose him, tried to coax him by reminding him that +the anger was soon off. "Ay," replied the other very shrewdly, "but it's +nae suner aff than it's on again." I remember well an old servant of the +old school, who had been fifty years domesticated in a family. Indeed I +well remember the celebration of the half-century service completed. +There were rich scenes with Sandy and his mistress. Let me recall you +both to memory. Let me think of you, the kind, generous, warm-hearted +mistress; a gentlewoman by descent and by feeling; a true friend, a +sincere Christian. And let me think, too, of you, Sandy, an honest, +faithful, and attached member of the family. For you were in that house +rather as a humble friend than a servant. But out of this fifty years of +attached service there sprang a sort of domestic relation and freedom of +intercourse which would surprise people in these days. And yet Sandy +knew his place. Like Corporal Trim, who, although so familiar and +admitted to so much familiarity with my Uncle Toby, never failed in the +respectful address--never forgot to say "your honour." At a dinner party +Sandy was very active about changing his mistress's plate, and whipped +it off when he saw that she had got a piece of rich pate upon it. His +mistress, not liking such rapid movements, and at the same time knowing +that remonstrance was in vain, exclaimed, "Hout, Sandy, I'm no dune," +and dabbed her fork into the "pattee" as it disappeared, to rescue a +morsel. I remember her praise of English mutton was a great annoyance to +the Scottish prejudices of Sandy. One day she was telling me of a +triumph Sandy had upon that subject. The smell of the joint roasting had +become very offensive through the house. The lady called out to Sandy to +have the doors closed, and added, "That must be some horrid Scotch +mutton you have got." To Sandy's delight, this was a leg of _English_ +mutton his mistress had expressly chosen; and, as she significantly told +me, "Sandy never let that down upon me." On Deeside there existed, in my +recollection, besides the Saunders Paul I have alluded to, a number of +extraordinary acute and humorous Scottish characters amongst the lower +classes. The native gentry enjoyed their humour, and hence arose a +familiarity of intercourse which called forth many amusing scenes and +quaint rejoinders. A celebrated character of this description bore the +soubriquet of "Boaty," of whom I have already spoken. He had acted as +Charon of the Dee at Banchory, and passed the boat over the river before +there was a bridge. Boaty had many curious sayings recorded of him. When +speaking of the gentry around, he characterised them according to their +occupations and activity of habits--thus:--"As to Mr. Russell of +Blackha', he just works himsell like a paid labourer; Mr. Duncan's a' +the day fish, fish; but Sir Robert's a perfect gentleman--he does +naething, naething." Boaty was a first-rate salmon-fisher himself, and +was much sought after by amateurs who came to Banchory for the sake of +the sport afforded by the beautiful Dee. He was, perhaps, a little +spoiled, and presumed upon the indulgence and familiarity shown to him +in the way of his craft--as, for example, he was in attendance with his +boat on a sportsman who was both skilful and successful, for he caught +salmon after salmon. Between each fish catching he solaced himself with +a good pull from a flask, which he returned to his pocket, however, +without offering to let Boaty have any participation in the refreshment. +Boaty, partly a little professionally jealous, perhaps, at the success, +and partly indignant at receiving less than his usual attention on such +occasions, and seeing no prospect of amendment, deliberately pulled the +boat to shore, shouldered the oars, rods, landing-nets, and all the +fishing apparatus which he had provided, and set off homewards. His +companion, far from considering his day's work to be over, and keen for +more sport, was amazed, and peremptorily ordered him to come back. But +all the answer made by the offended Boaty was, "Na na; them 'at drink by +themsells may just fish by themsells." + +The charge these old domestics used to take of the interests of the +family, and the cool way in which they took upon them to protect those +interests, sometimes led to very provoking, and sometimes to very +ludicrous, exhibitions of importance. A friend told me of a dinner scene +illustrative of this sort of interference which had happened at Airth in +the last generation. Mrs. Murray, of Abercairney, had been amongst the +guests, and at dinner one of the family noticed that she was looking for +the proper spoon to help herself with salt. The old servant, Thomas, was +appealed to, that the want might be supplied. He did not notice the +appeal. It was repeated in a more peremptory manner, "Thomas, Mrs. +Murray has not a salt-spoon!" to which he replied most emphatically, +"Last time Mrs. Murray dined here we _lost_ a salt-spoon." An old +servant who took a similar charge of everything that went on in the +family, having observed that his master thought that he had drunk wine +with every lady at table, but had overlooked one, jogged his memory with +the question, "What ails ye at her wi' the green gown?" + +In my own family I know a case of a very long service, and where, no +doubt, there was much interest and attachment; but it was a case where +the temper had not softened under the influence of years, but had rather +assumed that form of disposition which we denominate _crusty_. My +grand-uncle, Sir A. Ramsay, died in 1806, and left a domestic who had +been in his service since he was ten years of age; and being at the time +of his master's death past fifty or well on to sixty, he must have been +more than forty years a servant in the family. From the retired life my +grand-uncle had been leading, Jamie Layal had much of his own way, and, +like many a domestic so situated, he did not like to be contradicted, +and, in fact, could not bear to be found fault with. My uncle, who had +succeeded to a part of my grand-uncle's property, succeeded also to +Jamie Layal, and, from respect to his late master's memory and Jamie's +own services, he took him into his house, intending him to act as house +servant. However, this did not answer, and he was soon kept on, more +with the form than the reality of any active duty, and took any light +work that was going on about the house. In this capacity it was his +daily task to feed a flock of turkeys which were growing up to maturity. +On one occasion, my aunt having followed him in his work, and having +observed such a waste of food that the ground was actually covered with +grain which they could not eat, and which would soon be destroyed and +lost, naturally remonstrated, and suggested a more reasonable and +provident supply. But all the answer she got from the offended Jamie was +a bitter rejoinder, "Weel, then, neist time they sall get _nane ava!_" +On another occasion a family from a distance had called whilst my uncle +and aunt were out of the house. Jamie came into the parlour to deliver +the cards, or to announce that they had called. My aunt, somewhat vexed +at not having been in the way, inquired what message Mr. and Mrs. Innes +had left, as she had expected one. "No; no message." She returned to the +charge, and asked again if they had not told him _anything_ he was to +repeat. Still, "No; no message." "But did they say nothing? Are you sure +they said nothing?" Jamie, sadly put out and offended at being thus +interrogated, at last burst forth, "They neither said ba nor bum," and +indignantly left the room, banging the door after him. A characteristic +anecdote of one of these old domestics I have from a friend who was +acquainted with the parties concerned. The old man was standing at the +sideboard and attending to the demands of a pretty large dinner party; +the calls made for various wants from the company became so numerous and +frequent that the attendant got quite bewildered, and lost his patience +and temper; at length he gave vent to his indignation in a remonstrance +addressed to the whole company, "Cry a' thegither, that's the way to +be served." + +I have two characteristic and dry Scottish answers, traditional in the +Lothian family, supplied to me by the late excellent and highly-gifted +Marquis. A Marquis of Lothian of a former generation observed in his +walk two workmen very busy with a ladder to reach a bell, on which they +next kept up a furious ringing. He asked what was the object of making +such a din, to which the answer was, "Oh, juist, my lord to ca' the +workmen together!" "Why, how many are there?" asked his lordship. "Ou, +juist Sandy and me," was the quiet rejoinder. The same Lord Lothian, +looking about the garden, directed his gardener's attention to a +particular plum-tree, charging him to be careful of the produce of that +tree, and send the _whole_ of it in marked, as it was of a very +particular kind. "Ou," said the gardener, "I'll dae that, my lord; +there's juist twa o' them." + +These dry answers of Newbattle servants remind us of a similar state of +communication in a Yester domestic. Lord Tweeddale was very fond of +dogs, and on leaving Yester for London he instructed his head keeper, a +quaint bodie, to give him a periodical report of the kennel, and +particulars of his favourite dogs. Among the latter was an _especial_ +one, of the true Skye breed, called "Pickle," from which soubriquet we +may form a tolerable estimate of his qualities. + +It happened one day, in or about the year 1827, that poor Pickle, +during the absence of his master, was taken unwell; and the watchful +guardian immediately warned the Marquis of the sad fact, and of the +progress of the disease, which lasted three days--for which he sent the +three following laconic despatches:-- + + _Yester, May 1st_, 18--. + MY LORD, + Pickle's no weel. + Your Lordship's humble servant, etc. + + _Yester, May Id_, 18--. + MY LORD, + Pickle will no do. + I am your Lordship's, etc. + + _Tester, May 3d_, 18--. + MY LORD, + Pickle's dead. + I am your Lordship's, etc. + +I have heard of an old Forfarshire lady who, knowing the habits of her +old and spoilt servant, when she wished a note to be taken without loss +of time, held it open and read it over to him, saying, "There, noo, +Andrew, ye ken a' that's in't; noo dinna stop to open it, but just send +it aff." Of another servant, when sorely tried by an unaccustomed bustle +and hurry, a very amusing anecdote has been recorded. His mistress, a +woman of high rank, who had been living in much quiet and retirement for +some time, was called upon to entertain a large party at dinner. She +consulted with Nichol, her faithful servant, and all the arrangements +were made for the great event. As the company were arriving, the lady +saw Nichol running about in great agitation, and in his shirt sleeves. +She remonstrated, and said that as the guests were coming in he must +put on his coat, "Indeed, my lady," was his excited reply, "indeed, +there's sae muckle rinnin' here and rinnin' there, that I'm just +distrackit. I hae cuist'n my coat and waistcoat, and faith I dinna ken +how lang I can thole[42] my breeks." There is often a ready wit in this +class of character, marked by their replies. I have the following +communicated from an ear-witness:--"Weel, Peggy," said a man to an old +family servant, "I wonder ye're aye single yet!" "Me marry," said she, +indignantly; "I wouldna gie my single life for a' the double anes I +ever saw!" + +An old woman was exhorting a servant once about her ways. "You serve the +deevil," said she. "Me!" said the girl; "na, na, I dinna serve the +deevil; I serve ae single lady." + +A baby was out with the nurse, who walked it up and down the garden. +"Is't a laddie or a lassie?" said the gardener. "A laddie," said the +maid. "Weel," says he, "I'm glad o' that, for there's ower mony women in +the world." "Hech, man," said Jess, "div ye no ken there's aye maist +sawn o' the best crap?" + +The answers of servants used curiously to illustrate habits and manners +of the time,--as the economical modes of her mistress's life were well +touched by the lass who thus described her ways and domestic habits with +her household: "She's vicious upo' the wark; but eh, she's vary +mysterious o' the victualling." + +A country habit of making the gathering of the congregation in the +churchyard previous to and after divine service an occasion for gossip +and business, which I remember well, is thoroughly described in the +following:--A lady, on hiring a servant girl in the country, told her, +as a great indulgence, that she should have the liberty of attending the +church every Sunday, but that she would be expected to return home +always immediately on the conclusion of service. The lady, however, +rather unexpectedly found a positive objection raised against this +apparently reasonable arrangement. "Then I canna engage wi' ye, mem; for +'deed I wadna gie the crack i' the kirk-yard for a' the sermon." + +There is another story which shows that a greater importance might be +attached to the crack i' the kirk-yard than was done even by the servant +lass mentioned above. A rather rough subject, residing in Galloway, used +to attend church regularly, as it appeared, for the _sake_ of the crack; +for on being taken to task for his absenting himself, he remarked, +"There's nae need to gang to the kirk noo, for everybody gets a +newspaper." + +The changes that many of us have lived to witness in this kind of +intercourse between families and old servants is a part of a still +greater change--the change in that modification of the feudal system, +the attachment of clans. This, also, from transfers of property and +extinction of old families in the Highlands, as well as from more +general causes, is passing away; and it includes also changes in the +intercourse between landed proprietors and cottagers, and abolition of +harvest-homes, and such meetings. People are now more independent of +each other, and service has become a pecuniary and not a sentimental +question. The extreme contrast of that old-fashioned Scottish +intercourse of families with their servants and dependants, of which I +have given some amusing examples, is found in the modern manufactory +system. There the service is a mere question of personal interest. One +of our first practical engineers, and one of the first engine-makers in +England, stated that he employed and paid handsomely on an average 1200 +workmen; but that they held so little feeling for him as their master, +that not above half-a-dozen of the number would notice him when passing +him, either in the works or out of work hours. Contrast this advanced +state of dependants' indifference with the familiarity of domestic +intercourse we have been describing! + +It has been suggested by my esteemed friend, Dr. W. Lindsay Alexander, +that Scottish anecdotes deal too exclusively with the shrewd, quaint, +and pawky _humour_ of our countrymen, and have not sufficiently +illustrated the deep pathos and strong loving-kindness of the "kindly +Scot,"--qualities which, however little appreciated across the Border, +abound in Scottish poetry and Scottish life. For example, to take the +case before us of these old retainers, although snappy and disagreeable +to the last degree in their replies, and often most provoking in their +ways, they were yet deeply and sincerely attached to the family where +they had so long been domesticated; and the servant who would reply to +her mistress's order to mend the fire by the short answer, "The fire's +weel eneuch," would at the same time evince much interest in all that +might assist her in sustaining the credit of her domestic economy; as, +for example, whispering in her ear at dinner, "Press the jeelies; they +winna keep;" and had the hour of real trial and of difficulty come to +the family, would have gone to the death for them, and shared their +greatest privations. Dr. Alexander gives a very interesting example of +kindness and affectionate attachment in an old Scottish domestic of his +own family, whose quaint and odd familiarity was charming. I give it in +his own words:--"When I was a child there was an old servant at +Pinkieburn, where my early days were spent, who had been all her life, I +may say, in the house--for she came to it a child, and lived, without +ever leaving it, till she died in it, seventy-five years of age. Her +feeling to her old master, who was just two years younger than herself, +was a curious compound of the deference of a servant and the familiarity +and affection of a sister. She had known him as a boy, lad, man, and old +man, and she seemed to have a sort of notion that without her he must be +a very helpless being indeed. 'I aye keepit the hoose for him, whether +he was hame or awa',' was a frequent utterance of hers; and she never +seemed to think the intrusion even of his own nieces, who latterly lived +with him, at all legitimate. When on her deathbed, he hobbled to her +room with difficulty, having just got over a severe attack of gout, to +bid her farewell. I chanced to be present, but was too young to remember +what passed, except one thing, which probably was rather recalled to me +afterwards than properly recollected by me. It was her last request. +'Laird,' said she (for so she always called him, though his lairdship +was of the smallest), 'will ye tell them to bury me whaur I'll lie +across at your feet?' I have always thought this characteristic of the +old Scotch servant, and as such I send it to you." + +And here I would introduce another story which struck me very forcibly +as illustrating the union of the qualities referred to by Dr. Alexander. +In the following narrative, how deep and tender a feeling is expressed +in a brief dry sentence! I give Mr. Scott's language[43]:--"My brother +and I were, during our High School vacation, some forty years ago, very +much indebted to the kindness of a clever young carpenter employed in +the machinery workshop of New Lanark Mills, near to which we were +residing during our six weeks' holidays." It was he--Samuel Shaw, our +dear companion--who first taught us to saw, and to plane, and to turn +too; and who made us the bows and arrows in which we so much delighted. +The vacation over, and our hearts very sore, but bound to Samuel Shaw +for ever, our mother sought to place some pecuniary recompense in his +hand at parting, for all the great kindness he had shown her boys. +Samuel looked in her face, and gently moving her hand aside, with an +affectionate look cast upon us, who were by, exclaimed, in a tone which +had sorrow in it, "Noo, Mrs. Scott, _ye hae spoilt a'_." After such an +appeal, it may be supposed no recompense, in silver or in gold, remained +with Samuel Shaw. + +On the subject of the old Scottish domestic, I have to acknowledge a +kind communication from Lord Kinloch, which I give in his Lordship's +words:--"My father had been in the counting-house of the well-known +David Dale, the founder of the Lanark Mills, and eminent for his +benevolence. Mr. Dale, who it would appear was a short stout man, had a +person in his employment named Matthew, who was permitted that +familiarity with his master which was so characteristic of the former +generation. One winter day Mr. Dale came into the counting-house, and +complained that he had fallen on the ice. Matthew, who saw that his +master was not much hurt, grinned a sarcastic smile. 'I fell all my +length,' said Mr. Dale. 'Nae great length, sir,' said Matthew. 'Indeed, +Matthew, ye need not laugh,' said Mr. Dale; 'I have hurt the sma' o' my +back.' 'I wunner whaur _that_ is,' said Matthew." Indeed, specimens +like Matthew, of serving-men of the former time, have latterly been fast +going out, but I remember one or two such. A lady of my acquaintance had +one named John in her house at Portobello. I remember how my modern +ideas were offended by John's familiarity when waiting at table. "Some +more wine, John," said his mistress. "There's some i' the bottle, mem," +said John. A little after, "Mend the fire, John." "The fire's weel +eneuch, mem," replied the impracticable John. Another "John" of my +acquaintance was in the family of Mrs. Campbell of Ardnave, mother of +the Princess Polignac and the Hon. Mrs. Archibald Macdonald. A young +lady visiting in the family asked John at dinner for a potato. John made +no response. The request was repeated; when John, putting his mouth to +her ear, said, very audibly, "There's jist twa in the dish, and they +maun be keepit for the strangers." + +The following was sent me by a kind correspondent--a learned Professor +in India--as a sample of _squabbling_ between Scottish servants. A +mistress observing something peculiar in her maid's manner, addressed +her, "Dear me, Tibbie, what are you so snappish about, that you go +knocking the things as you dust them?" "Ou, mem, it's Jock." "Well, what +has Jock been doing?" "Ou (with an indescribable, but easily imaginable +toss of the head), he was angry at me, an' misca'd me, an' I said I was +juist as the Lord had made me, an'----" "Well, Tibbie?" "An' he said the +Lord could hae had little to dae whan he made me." The idea of Tibbie +being the work of an idle moment was one, the deliciousness of which was +not likely to be relished by the lassie. + +The following characteristic anecdote of a Highland servant I have +received from the same correspondent. An English gentleman, travelling +in the Highlands, was rather late of coming down to dinner. Donald was +sent up stairs to intimate that all was ready. He speedily returned, +nodding significantly, as much as to say that it was all right. "But, +Donald," said the master, after some further trial of a hungry man's +patience, "are ye sure ye made the gentleman understand?" +"_Understand?_" retorted Donald (who had peeped into the room and found +the guest engaged at his toilet), "I'se warrant ye he understands; he's +_sharping_ his teeth,"--not supposing the tooth-brush could be for any +other use. + +There have been some very amusing instances given of the matter-of-fact +obedience paid to orders by Highland retainers when made to perform the +ordinary duties of domestic servants; as when Mr. Campbell, a Highland +gentleman, visiting in a country house, and telling Donald to bring +everything out of the bedroom, found all its movable articles--fender, +fire-irons, etc.--piled up in the lobby; so literal was the poor man's +sense of obedience to orders! And of this he gave a still more +extraordinary proof during his sojourn in Edinburgh, by a very ludicrous +exploit. When the family moved into a house there, Mrs. Campbell gave +him very particular instructions regarding visitors, explaining that +they were to be shown into the drawing-room, and no doubt used the +Scotticism, "_Carry_ any ladies that call up stairs." On the arrival of +the first visitors, Donald was eager to show his strict attention to the +mistress's orders. Two ladies came together, and Donald, seizing one in +his arms, said to the other, "Bide ye there till I come for ye," and, in +spite of her struggles and remonstrances, ushered the terrified visitor +into Mrs. Campbell's presence in this unwonted fashion. + +Another case of _literal_ obedience to orders produced a somewhat +startling form of message. A servant of an old maiden lady, a patient of +Dr. Poole, formerly of Edinburgh, was under orders to go to the doctor +every morning to report the state of her health, how she had slept, +etc., with strict injunctions _always_ to add, "with her compliments." +At length, one morning the girl brought this extraordinary +message:--"Miss S----'s compliments, and she dee'd last night at +aicht o'clock!" + +I recollect, in Montrose (that fruitful field for old Scottish +stories!), a most naive reply from an honest lass, servant to old Mrs. +_Captain_ Fullerton. A party of gentlemen had dined with Mrs. Fullerton, +and they had a turkey for dinner. Mrs. F. proposed that one of the legs +should be _deviled_, and the gentlemen have it served up as a relish for +their wine. Accordingly one of the company skilled in the mystery +prepared it with pepper, cayenne, mustard, ketchup, etc. He gave it to +Lizzy, and told her to take it down to the kitchen, supposing, as a +matter of course, she would know that it was to be broiled, and brought +back in due time. But in a little while, when it was rung for, Lizzy +very innocently replied that she had eaten it up. As it was sent back to +the kitchen, her only idea was that it must be for herself. But on +surprise being expressed that she had eaten what was so highly peppered +and seasoned, she very quaintly answered, "Ou, I liket it a' +the better." + +A well-known servant of the old school was John, the servant of Pitfour, +Mr. Ferguson, M.P., himself a most eccentric character, long father of +the House of Commons, and a great friend of Pitt. John used to +entertain the tenants, on Pitfour's brief visits to his estate, with +numerous anecdotes of his master and Mr. Pitt; but he always prefaced +them with something in the style of Cardinal Wolsey's _Ego et rex +meus_--with "Me, and Pitt, and Pitfour," went somewhere, or performed +some exploit. The famous Duchess of Gordon once wrote a note to John +(the name of this eccentric valet), and said, "John, put Pitfour into +the carriage on Tuesday, and bring him up to Gordon Castle to dinner." +After sufficiently scratching his head, and considering what he should +do, he showed the letter to Pitfour, who smiled, and said drily, "Well, +John, I suppose we must go." + +An old domestic of this class gave a capital reason to his _young_ +master for his being allowed to do as he liked:--"Ye needna find faut +wi' me, Maister Jeems; _I hae been langer aboot the place than yersel_." + +It may seem ungracious to close this chapter with a communication which +appears to convey an unfavourable impression of an old servant. But the +truth is, real and attached domestic service does not offer its +pleasures and advantages without some alloy of annoyance, and yet how +much the solid benefits prevail over any occasional drawbacks! + +The late Rev. Mr. Leslie of St. Andrew-Lhanbryd, a parish in Morayshire, +in describing an old servant who had been with him thirty years, said, +"The first ten years she was an excellent servant; the second ten she +was a good mistress; but the third ten she was a perfect tyrant." + + + +CHAPTER THE FIFTH. + +SCOTTISH JUDGES. + +There is no class of men which stands out more prominent in the +reminiscences of the last hundred years than that of our SCOTTISH +JUDGES. They form, in many instances, a type or representative of the +leading _peculiarities_ of Scottish life and manners. They are mixed up +with all our affairs, social and political. There are to be found in the +annals of the bench rich examples of pure Scottish humour, the strongest +peculiarity of Scottish phraseology, acuteness of intellect, cutting +wit, eccentricity of manners, and abundant powers of conviviality. Their +successors no longer furnish the same anecdotes of oddity or of +intemperance. The Courts of the Scottish Parliament House, without +lacking the learning or the law of those who sat there sixty years ago, +lack not the refinement and the dignity that have long distinguished the +Courts of Westminster Hall. + +Stories still exist, traditionary in society, amongst its older members, +regarding Lords Gardenstone, Monboddo, Hermand, Newton, Polkemmet, +Braxfield, etc. But many younger persons do not know them. It may be +interesting to some of my readers to devote a few pages to the subject, +and to offer some judicial gleanings[44]. + +I have two anecdotes to show that, both in social and judicial life, a +remarkable change must have taken place amongst the "fifteen." I am +assured that the following scene took place at the _table_ of Lord +Polkemmet, at a dinner party in his house. When the covers were removed, +the dinner was seen to consist of veal broth, a roast fillet of veal, +veal cutlets, a florentine (an excellent old Scottish dish composed of +veal), a calf's head, calf's foot jelly. The worthy judge could not help +observing a surprise on the countenance of his guests, and perhaps a +simper on some; so he broke out in explanation: "Ou ay, it's a cauf; +when we kill a beast we just eat up ae side, and down the tither." The +expressions he used to describe his own _judicial_ preparations for the +bench were very characteristic: "Ye see I first read a' the pleadings, +and then, after lettin' them wamble in my wame wi' the toddy twa or +three days, I gie my ain interlocutor." For a moment suppose such +anecdotes to be told now of any of our high legal functionaries. Imagine +the feelings of surprise that would be called forth were the present +Justice-Clerk to adopt such imagery in describing the process of +preparing _his_ legal judgment on a difficult case in his court! + +In regard to the wit of the Scottish _bar_.--It is a subject which I do +not pretend to illustrate. It would require a volume for itself. One +anecdote, however, I cannot resist, and I record it as forming a +striking example of the class of Scottish humour which, with our +dialect, has lost its distinctive characteristics. John Clerk +(afterwards a judge by the title of Lord Eldin) was arguing a Scotch +appeal case before the House of Lords. His client claimed the use of a +mill-stream by a prescriptive right. Mr. Clerk spoke broad Scotch, and +argued that "the _watter_ had rin that way for forty years. Indeed +naebody kenn'd how long, and why should his client now be deprived of +the watter?" etc. The chancellor, much amused at the pronunciation of +the Scottish advocate, in a rather bantering tone asked him, "Mr. Clerk, +do you spell water in Scotland with two t's?" Clerk, a little nettled at +this hit at his national tongue, answered, "Na, my Lord, we dinna spell +watter (making the word as short as he could) wi' twa t's, but we spell +mainners (making the word as long as he could) wi' twa n's." + +John Clerk's vernacular version of the motto of the Celtic Club is +highly characteristic of his humour and his prejudice. He had a strong +dislike to the whole Highland race, and the motto assumed by the modern +Celts, "Olim marte, nunc arte," Clerk translated "Formerly robbers, now +thieves." Quite equal to Swift's celebrated remark on William III.'s +motto--_Recepit, non rapuit_--"that the receiver was as bad as the +thief." Very dry and pithy too was Clerk's legal _opinion_ given to a +claimant of the Annandale peerage, who, when pressing the employment of +some obvious forgeries, was warned that if he persevered, nae doot he +might be a peer, but it would be a peer o' anither _tree!_ + +The clever author of "Peter's Letters" gives an elaborate description of +Clerk's character whilst at the bar, and speaks of him as "the plainest, +the shrewdest, and the most sarcastic of men." Nor could he entirely +repress these peculiarities when raised to the bench under the title of +Lord Eldin. + +His defence of a young friend, who was an advocate, and had incurred +the displeasure of the Judges, has often been repeated. Mr. Clerk had +been called upon to offer his apologies for disrespect, or implied +disrespect, in his manner of addressing the Bench. The advocate had +given great offence by expressing his "_astonishment_" at something +which had emanated from their Lordships, implying by it his disapproval. +He got Lord Eldin, who was connected with him, to make an apology for +him. But Clerk could not resist his humorous vein by very equivocally +adding, "My client has expressed his astonishment, my Lords, at what he +had met with here; if my young friend had known this court as long as I +have, he would have been _astonished at nothing_." + +A kind Perthshire correspondent has sent me a characteristic anecdote, +which has strong internal evidence of being genuine. When Clerk was +raised to the Bench he presented his credentials to the Court, and, +according to custom, was received by the presiding Judge--who, on this +occasion, in a somewhat sarcastic tone, referred to the delay which had +taken place in his reaching a position for which he had so long been +qualified, and to which he must have long aspired. He hinted at the long +absence of the Whig party from political power as the cause of this +delay, which offended Clerk; and he paid it off by intimating in his +pithy and bitter tone, which he could so well assume, that it was not of +so much consequence--"Because," as he said, "ye see, my Lord, I was not +juist sae sune _doited_ as some o' your Lordships." + +The following account of his conducting a case is also highly +characteristic. Two individuals, the one a mason, the other a carpenter, +both residenters in West Portsburgh, formed a copartnery, and commenced +building houses within the boundaries of the burgh corporation. One of +the partners was a freeman, the other not. The corporation, considering +its rights invaded by a non-freeman exercising privileges only accorded +to one of their body, brought an action in the Court of Session against +the interloper, and his partner as aiding and abetting. Mr. John Clerk, +then an advocate, was engaged for the defendants. How the cause was +decided matters little. What was really curious in the affair was the +naively droll manner in which the advocate for the defence opened his +pleading before the Lord Ordinary. "My Lord," commenced John, in his +purest Doric, at the same time pushing up his spectacles to his brow and +hitching his gown over his shoulders, "I wad hae thocht naething o't +(the action), had hooses been a new invention, and my clients been +caught ouvertly impingin' on the patent richts o' the inventors!" + +Of Lord Gardenstone (Francis Garden) I have many early _personal_ +reminiscences, as his property of Johnstone was in the Howe of the +Mearns, not far from my early home. He was a man of energy, and promoted +improvements in the county with skill and practical sagacity. His +favourite scheme was to establish a flourishing town upon his property, +and he spared no pains or expense in promoting the importance of his +village of Laurencekirk. He built an excellent inn, to render it a stage +for posting. He built and endowed an Episcopal chapel for the benefit of +his English immigrants, in the vestry of which he placed a most +respectable library; and he encouraged manufacturers of all kinds to +settle in the place. Amongst others, as we have seen, came the hatter +who found only three hats in the kirk. His lordship was much taken up +with his hotel or inn, and for which he provided a large volume for +receiving the written contributions of travellers who frequented it. It +was the landlady's business to present this volume to the guests, and +ask them to write in it during the evenings whatever occurred to their +memory or their imagination. In the mornings it was a favourite +amusement of Lord Gardenstone to look it over. I recollect Sir Walter +Scott being much taken with this contrivance, and his asking me about it +at Abbotsford. His son said to him, "You should establish such a book, +sir, at Melrose;" upon which Sir W. replied, "No, Walter; I should just +have to see a great deal of abuse of myself." On his son deprecating +such a result, and on his observing my surprised look, he answered, +"Well, well, I should have to read a great deal of foolish praise, which +is much the same thing." An amusing account is given of the cause of +Lord Gardenstone withdrawing this volume from the hotel, and of his +determination to submit it no more to the tender mercies of the passing +traveller. As Professor Stuart of Aberdeen was passing an evening at the +inn, the volume was handed to him, and he wrote in it the following +lines, in the style of the prophecies of Thomas the Rhymer:-- + + "Frae sma' beginnings Rome of auld + Became a great imperial city; + 'Twas peopled first, as we are tauld, + By bankrupts, vagabonds, banditti. + Quoth Thamas, Then the day may come, + When Laurencekirk shall equal Rome." + +These lines so nettled Lord Gardenstone, that the volume disappeared, +and was never seen afterwards in the inn of Laurencekirk. There is +another lingering reminiscence which I retain connected with the inn at +Laurencekirk. The landlord, Mr. Cream, was a man well known throughout +all the county, and was distinguished, in his later years, as one of the +few men who continued to wear a _pigtail_. On one occasion the late Lord +Dunmore (grandfather or great-grandfather of the present peer), who also +still wore his queue, halted for a night at Laurencekirk. On the host +leaving the room, where he had come to take orders for supper, Lord +Dunmore turned to his valet and said, "Johnstone, do I look as like a +fool in my pigtail as Billy Cream does?"--"Much about it, my lord," was +the valet's imperturbable answer. "Then," said his lordship, "cut off +mine to-morrow morning when I dress." + +Lord Gardenstone seemed to have had two favourite tastes: he indulged in +the love of pigs and the love of snuff. He took a young pig as a pet, +and it became quite tame, and followed him about like a dog. At first +the animal shared his bed, but when, growing up to advanced swinehood, +it became unfit for such companionship, he had it to sleep in his room, +in which he made a comfortable couch for it of his own clothes. His +snuff he kept not in a box, but in a leathern waist-pocket made for the +purpose. He took it in enormous quantities, and used to say that if he +had a dozen noses he would feed them all. Lord Gardenstone died 1793. + +Lord Monboddo (James Burnet, Esq. of Monboddo) is another of the +well-known members of the Scottish Bench, who combined, with many +eccentricities of opinion and habits, great learning and a most amiable +disposition. From his paternal property being in the county of +Kincardine, and Lord M. being a visitor at my father's house, and +indeed a relation or clansman, I have many early reminiscences of +stories which I have heard of the learned judge. His speculations +regarding the origin of the human race have, in times past, excited much +interest and amusement. His theory was that man emerged from a wild and +savage condition, much resembling that of apes; that man had then a tail +like other animals, but which by progressive civilisation and the +constant habit of _sitting_, had become obsolete. This theory produced +many a joke from facetious and superficial people, who had never read +any of the arguments of the able and elaborate work, by which the +ingenious and learned author maintained his theory[45]. Lord Kames, a +brother judge, had his joke on it. On some occasion of their meeting, +Lord Monboddo was for giving Lord Kames the precedency. Lord K. +declined, and drew back, saying, "By no means, my lord; you must walk +first, that I may _see your tail_." I recollect Lord Monboddo's coming +to dine at Fasque caused a great excitement of interest and curiosity. I +was in the nursery, too young to take part in the investigations; but my +elder brothers were on the alert to watch his arrival, and get a glimpse +of his tail. Lord M. was really a learned man, read Greek and Latin +authors--not as a mere exercise of classical scholarship--but because he +identified himself with their philosophical opinions, and would have +revived Greek customs and modes of life. He used to give suppers after +the manner of the ancients, and used to astonish his guests by the +ancient cookery of Spartan broth, and of _mulsum_. He was an +enthusiastical Platonist. On a visit to Oxford, he was received with +great respect by the scholars of the University, who were much +interested in meeting with one who had studied Plato as a pupil and +follower. In accordance with the old custom at learned universities, +Lord Monboddo was determined to address the Oxonians in Latin, which he +spoke with much readiness. But they could not stand the numerous slips +in prosody. Lord Monboddo shocked the ears of the men of Eton and of +Winchester by dreadful false quantities--verse-making being, in +Scotland, then quite neglected, and a matter little thought of by the +learned judge. + +Lord Monboddo was considered an able lawyer, and on many occasions +exhibited a very clear and correct judicial discernment of intricate +cases. It was one of his peculiarities that he never sat on the bench +with his brother judges, but always at the clerk's table. Different +reasons for this practice have been given, but the simple fact seems to +have been, that he was deaf, and heard better at the lower seat. His +mode of travelling was on horseback. He scorned carriages, on the ground +of its being unmanly to "sit in a box drawn by brutes." When he went to +London he rode the whole way. At the same period, Mr. Barclay of Ury +(father of the well-known Captain Barclay), when he represented +Kincardineshire in Parliament, always _walked_ to London. He was a very +powerful man, and could walk fifty miles a day, his usual refreshment on +the road being a bottle of port wine, poured into a bowl, and drunk off +at a draught. I have heard that George III. was much interested at these +performances, and said, "I ought to be proud of my Scottish subjects, +when my judges _ride_, and my members of Parliament _walk_ to the +metropolis." + +On one occasion of his being in London, Lord Monboddo attended a trial +in the Court of King's Bench. A cry was heard that the roof of the +court-room was giving way, upon which judges, lawyers, and people made +a rush to get to the door. Lord Monboddo viewed the scene from his +corner with much composure. Being deaf and short-sighted, he knew +nothing of the cause of the tumult. The alarm proved a false one; and on +being asked why he had not bestirred himself to escape like the rest, he +coolly answered that he supposed it was an _annual ceremony_, with +which, as an alien to the English laws, he had no concern, but which he +considered it interesting to witness as a remnant of antiquity! Lord +Monboddo died 1799. + +Lord Rockville (the Hon. Alexander Gordon, third son of the Earl of +Aberdeen) was a judge distinguished in his day by his ability and +decorum. "He adorned the bench by the dignified manliness of his +appearance, and polished urbanity of his manners[46]." Like most lawyers +of his time, he took his glass freely, and a whimsical account which he +gave, before he was advanced to the bench, of his having fallen upon his +face, after making too free with the bottle, was commonly current at the +time. Upon his appearing late at a convivial club with a most rueful +expression of countenance, and on being asked what was the matter, he +exclaimed with great solemnity, "Gentlemen, I have just met with the +most extraordinary adventure that ever occurred to a human being. As I +was walking along the Grassmarket, all of a sudden _the street rose up +and struck me on the face_." He had, however, a more serious _encounter_ +with the street after he was a judge. In 1792, his foot slipped as he +was going to the Parliament House; he broke his leg, was taken home, +fevered, and died. + +Lord Braxfield (Robert M'Queen of Braxfield) was one of the judges of +the old school, well known in his day, and might be said to possess all +the qualities united, by which the class were remarkable. He spoke the +broadest Scotch. He was a sound and laborious lawyer. He was fond of a +glass of good claret, and had a great fund of good Scotch humour. He +rose to the dignity of Justice-Clerk, and, in consequence, presided at +many important political criminal trials about the year 1793-4, such as +those of Muir, Palmer, Skirving, Margarot, Gerrold, etc. He conducted +these trials with much ability and great firmness, occasionally, no +doubt, with more appearance of severity and personal prejudice than is +usual with the judges who in later times are called on to preside on +similar occasions. The disturbed temper of the times and the daring +spirit of the political offenders seemed, he thought, to call for a bold +and fearless front on the part of the judge, and Braxfield was the man +to show it, both on the bench and in common life. He met, however, +sometimes with a spirit as bold as his own from the prisoners before +him. When Skirving was on trial for sedition, he thought Braxfield was +threatening him, and by gesture endeavouring to intimidate him; +accordingly, he boldly addressed the Bench:--"It is altogether +unavailing for your Lordship to menace me, for I have long learnt not to +fear the face of man." I have observed that he adhered to the _broadest_ +Scottish dialect. "Hae ye ony coonsel, man?" he said to Maurice Margarot +(who, I believe, was an Englishman). "No," was the reply. "Div ye want +to hae ony appinted?" "No," replied Margarot; "I only want an +_interpreter_ to make me understand what your Lordship says." A +prisoner, accused of stealing some linen garments, was one day brought +up for trial before the old judge, but was acquitted because the +prosecutor had charged him with stealing shirts, whereas the articles +stolen were found to be shifts--female apparel. Braxfield indignantly +remarked that the Crown Counsel should have called them by the Scottish +name of _sarks_, which applied to both sexes. + +Braxfield had much humour, and enjoyed wit in others. He was immensely +delighted at a reply by Dr. M'Cubbin, the minister of Bothwell. +Braxfield, when Justice-Clerk, was dining at Lord Douglas's, and +observed there was only port upon the table. In his usual off-hand +brusque manner, he demanded of the noble host if "there was nae claret +i' the castle." "Yes," said Lord Douglas; "but my butler tells me it is +not good." "Let's pree't," said Braxfield in his favourite dialect. A +bottle was produced, and declared by all present to be quite excellent. +"Noo, minister," said the old judge, addressing Dr. M'Cubbin, who was +celebrated as a wit in his day, "as a _fama clamosa_ has gone forth +against this wine, I propose that you _absolve_ it,"--playing upon the +terms made use of in the Scottish Church Courts. "Ay, my Lord," said the +minister, "you are first-rate authority for a case of civil or criminal +law, but you do not quite understand our Church Court practice. We never +absolve _till after three several appearances_." The wit and the +condition of absolution were alike relished by the judge. Lord Braxfield +closed a long and useful life in 1799. + +Of Lord Hermand we have already had occasion to speak, as in fact his +name has become in some manner identified with that conviviality which +marked almost as a characteristic the Scottish Bench of his time. He +gained, however, great distinction as a judge, and was a capital lawyer. +When at the bar, Lords Newton and Hermand were great friends, and many +were the convivial meetings they enjoyed together. But Lord Hermand +outlived all his old last-century contemporaries, and formed with Lord +Balgray what we may consider the connecting links between the past and +the present race of Scottish lawyers. + +Lord Kames was a keen agricultural experimentalist, and in his +_Gentleman Farmer_ anticipated many modern improvements. He was, +however, occasionally too sanguine. "John," said he one day to his old +overseer, "I think we'll see the day when a man may carry out as much +chemical manure in his waistcoat pocket as will serve for a whole +field." "Weel," rejoined the other, "I am of opinion that if your +lordship were to carry out the dung in your waistcoat pocket, ye might +bring hame the crap in your greatcoat pocket." + +We could scarcely perhaps offer a more marked difference between habits +_once_ tolerated on the bench and those which now distinguish the august +seat of Senators of Justice, than by quoting, from _Kay's Portraits_, +vol. ii. p. 278, a sally of a Lord of Session of those days, which he +played off, when sitting as judge, upon a young friend whom he was +determined to frighten. "A young counsel was addressing him on some not +very important point that had arisen in the division of a common (or +commonty, according to law phraseology), when, having made some bold +averment, the judge exclaimed, 'That's a lee, Jemmie,' 'My lord!' +ejaculated the amazed barrister. 'Ay, ay, Jemmie; I see by your face +ye're leein'.' 'Indeed, my lord, I am not.' 'Dinna tell me that; it's no +in your memorial (brief)--awa wi' you;' and, overcome with astonishment +and vexation, the discomfited barrister left the bar. The judge +thereupon chuckled with infinite delight; and beckoning to the clerk +who attended on the occasion, he said, 'Are ye no Rabbie H----'s man?' +'Yes, my lord.' 'Wasna Jemmie----leein'?' 'Oh no, my lord.' 'Ye're quite +sure?' Oh yes.' 'Then just write out what you want, and I'll sign it; my +faith, but I made Jemmie stare.' So the decision was dictated by the +clerk, and duly signed by the judge, who left the bench highly diverted +with the fright he had given his young friend." Such scenes enacted in +court _now_ would astonish the present generation, both of lawyers and +of suitors. + +We should not do justice to our Scottish Reminiscences of judges and +lawyers, if we omitted the once celebrated Court of Session _jeu +d'esprit_ called the "Diamond Beetle Case." This burlesque report of a +judgment was written by George Cranstoun, advocate, who afterwards sat +in court as judge under the title of Lord Corehouse. Cranstoun was one +of the ablest lawyers of his time; he was a prime scholar, and a man of +most refined taste and clear intellect. This humorous and clever +production was printed in a former edition of these Reminiscences, and +in a very flattering notice of the book which appeared in the _North +British Review_, the reviewer--himself, as is well known, a +distinguished member of the Scottish judicial bench--remarks: "We are +glad that the whole of the 'Diamond Beetle' by Cranstoun has been given; +for nothing can be more graphic, spirited, and ludicrous, than the +characteristic speeches of the learned judges who deliver their opinions +in the case of defamation." As copies of this very clever and jocose +production are not now easily obtained, and as some of my younger +readers may not have seen it, I have reprinted it in this edition. +Considered in the light of a memorial of the bench, as it was known to +a former generation, it is well worth preserving; for, as the editor of +_Kay's Portraits_ well observes, although it is a caricature, it is +entirely without rancour, or any feeling of a malevolent nature towards +those whom the author represents as giving judgment in the "Diamond +Beetle" case. And in no way could the involved phraseology of Lord +Bannatyne, the predilection for Latin quotation of Lord Meadowbank, the +brisk manner of Lord Hermand, the anti-Gallic feeling of Lord Craig, the +broad dialect of Lords Polkemmet and Balmuto, and the hesitating manner +of Lord Methven, be more admirably caricatured. + + FULL COPY OF THE FINDING OF THE COURT IN + THE ONCE CELEBRATED "DIAMOND BEETLE + CASE[47]." + + _Speeches taken at advising the Action of Defamation and + Damages,_ ALEXANDER CUNNINGHAM, _Jeweller in + Edinburgh, against_ JAMES EUSSELL, _Surgeon there_. + + "THE LORD PRESIDENT (Sir ILAY CAMPBELL).--Your Lordships + have the petition of Alexander Cunningham against Lord + Bannatyne's interlocutor. It is a case of defamation and + damages for calling the petitioner's _Diamond Beetle_ an + _Egyptian Louse_. You have the Lord Ordinary's distinct + interlocutor, on pages 29 and 30 of this petition:--'Having + considered the Condescendence of the pursuer, Answers for the + defender,' and so on; 'Finds, in respect that it is not + alleged that the diamonds on the back of the Diamond Beetle + are real diamonds, or anything but shining spots, such as are + found on other Diamond Beetles, which likewise occur, though + in a smaller number, on a great number of other Beetles, + somewhat different from the Beetle libelled, and similar to + which there may be Beetles in Egypt, with shining spots on + their backs, which may be termed Lice there, and may be + different not only from the common Louse, but from the Louse + mentioned by Moses as one of the plagues of Egypt, which is + admitted to be a filthy troublesome Louse, even worse than + the said Louse, which is clearly different from the Louse + libelled. But that the other Louse is the same with, or + similar to, the said Beetle, which is also the same with the + other Beetle; and although different from the said Beetle + libelled, yet, as the said Beetle is similar to the other + Beetle, and the said Louse to the other Louse libelled; and + the other Louse to the other Beetle, which is the same with, + or similar to, the Beetle which somewhat resembles the Beetle + libelled; assoilzies the defender, and finds expenses due.' + + "Say away, my Lords. + + "LORD MEADOWBANK.--This is a very intricate and puzzling + question, my Lord. I have formed no decided opinion; but at + present I am rather inclined to think the interlocutor is + right, though not upon the _ratio_ assigned in it. It appears + to me that there are two points for consideration. _First_, + whether the words libelled amount to a _convicium_ against + the Beetle; and _Secondly_, admitting the _convicium_, + whether the pursuer is entitled to found upon it in this + action. Now, my Lords, if there be a _convicium_ at all, it + consists in the _comparatio_ or comparison of the + _Scaraboeus_ or Beetle with the Egyptian _Pediculus_ or + _Louse_. My first doubt regards this point, but it is not at + all founded on what the defender alleges, that there is no + such animal as an Egyptian _Pediculus_ or _Louse in rerum + natura_; for though it does not _actually_ exist, it may + _possibly_ exist (if not in _actio_, yet in _potentia_--if + not in actuality, yet in potentiality or capacity); and + whether its existence be in _esse vel posse_, is the same + thing to this question, provided there be _termini habiles_ + for ascertaining what it would be if it did exist. But my + doubt is here:--How am I to discover what are the _essentia_ + of any Louse, whether Egyptian or not? It is very easy to + describe its accidents as a naturalist would do--to say that + it belongs to the tribe of _Aptera_ (or, that is, a yellow, + little, greedy, filthy, despicable reptile), but we do not + learn from this what the _proprium_ of the animal is in a + logical sense, and still less what its _differentia_ are. + Now, without these it is impossible to judge whether there is + a _convicium_ or not; for, in a case of this kind, which + _sequitur naturam delicti_, we must take them _meliori + sensu_, and presume the _comparatio_ to be _in melioribus + tantum_. And here I beg that parties, and the bar in + general--[interrupted by Lord Hermand: _Your Lordship should + address yourself to the Chair_]--I say, I beg it may be + understood that I do not rest my opinion on the ground that + _veritas convicii excusat_. I am clear that although this + Beetle actually were an Egyptian Louse, it would accord no + relevant defence, provided the calling it so were a + _convicium_; and there my doubt lies. + + "With regard to the second point, I am satisfied that the + _Scaraboeus_ or Beetle itself has no _persona standi in + judicio_; and therefore the pursuer cannot insist in the name + of the _Scaraboeus_, or for his behoof. If the action lie at + all, it must be at the instance of the pursuer himself, as + the _verus dominus_ of the _Scaraboeus_, for being + calumniated through the _convicium_ directed primarily + against the animal standing in that relation to him. Now, + abstracting from the qualification of an actual _dominium_, + which is not alleged, I have great doubts whether a mere + _convicium_ is necessarily transmitted from one object to + another, through the relation of a _dominium_ subsisting + between them; and if not necessarily transmissible, we must + see the principle of its actual transmission here; and that + has not yet been pointed out. + + "LORD HERMAND.--We heard a little ago, my Lord, that there is + a difficulty in this case; but I have not been fortunate + enough, for my part, to find out where the difficulty lies. + Will any man presume to tell me that a Beetle is not a + Beetle, and that a Louse is not a Louse? I never saw the + petitioner's Beetle, and what's more I don't care whether I + ever see it or not; but I suppose it's like other Beetles, + and that's enough for me. + + "But, my Lord, I know the other reptile well. I have seen + them, I have felt them, my Lord, ever since I was a child in + my mother's arms; and my mind tells me that nothing but the + deepest and blackest malice rankling in the human breast + could have suggested this comparison, or led any man to form + a thought so injurious and insulting. But, my Lord, there's + more here than all that--a great deal more. One could have + thought the defender would have gratified his spite to the + full by comparing the Beetle to a common Louse--an animal + sufficiently vile and abominable for the purpose of + defamation--[_Shut that door there_]--but he adds the epithet + _Egyptian_, and I know well what he means by that epithet. He + means, my Lord, a Louse that has been fattened on the head of + a _Gipsy or Tinker_, undisturbed by the comb or nail, and + unmolested in the enjoyment of its native filth. He means a + Louse grown to its full size, ten times larger and ten times + more abominable than those with which _your Lordships and I + are familiar_. The petitioner asks redress for the injury so + atrocious and so aggravated; and, as far as my voice goes, he + shall not ask it in vain. + + "LORD CRAIG.--I am of the opinion last delivered. It appears + to me to be slanderous and calumnious to compare a Diamond + Beetle to the filthy and mischievous animal libelled. By an + Egyptian Louse I understand one which has been formed on the + head of a native Egyptian--a race of men who, after + degenerating for many centuries, have sunk at last into the + abyss of depravity, in consequence of having been subjugated + for a time by the French. I do not find that Turgot, or + Condorcet, or the rest of the economists, ever reckoned the + combing of the head a species of productive labour; and I + conclude, therefore, that wherever French principles have + been propagated, _Lice_ grow to an immoderate size, + especially in a warm climate like that of Egypt. I shall only + add, that we ought to be sensible of the blessings we enjoy + under a free and happy Constitution, where Lice and men live + under the restraint of equal laws the only equality that can + exist in a well-regulated state. + + "LORD POLKEMMET.--It should be observed, my Lord, that what + is called a Beetle is a reptile very well known in this + country. I have seen mony are o' them in Drumshorlin Muir; it + is a little black beastie, about the size of my thoom-nail. + The country-folks ca' them Clocks; and I believe they ca' + them also Maggy-wi'-the-mony-feet; but they are not the least + like any Louse that ever I saw; so that, in my opinion, + though the defender may have made a blunder through + ignorance, in comparing them, there does not seem to have + been any _animus injuriandi_; therefore I am for refusing the + petition, my Lords. + + "LORD BALMUTO.--'Am[48] for refusing the petition. There's + more Lice than Beetles in Fife. They ca' them Clocks there. + What they ca' a Beetle is a thing as lang as my arm; thick at + one end and sma' at the other. I thought, when I read the + petition, that the Beetle or Bittle had been the thing that + the women have when they are washing towels or napery + with--things for dadding them with; and I see the petitioner + is a jeweller till his trade; and I thought he had are o' + thae Beetles, and set it all round with diamonds; and I + thought it a foolish and extravagant idea; and I saw no + resemblance it could have to a Louse. But I find I was + mistaken, my Lord; and I find it only a Beetle-clock the + petitioner has; but my opinion's the same as it was before. I + say, my Lords, 'am for refusing the petition, I say-- + + "LORD WOODHOUSELEE.--There is a case abridged in the third + volume of the _Dictionary of Decisions_, Chalmers _v._ + Douglas, in which it was found that _veritas convicii + excusat_, which may be rendered not literally, but in a free + and spirited manner, according to the most approved + principles of translation, 'the truth of calumny affords a + relevant defence.' If, therefore, it be the law of Scotland + (which I am clearly of opinion it is) that the truth of the + calumny affords a relevant defence, and if it be likewise + true that the Diamond Beetle is really an Egyptian Louse, I + am inclined to conclude (though certainly the case is + attended with difficulty) that the defender ought to be + assoilzied.--_Refuse_. + + "LORD JUSTICE-CLERK (RAE).--I am very well acquainted with + the defender in this action, and have respect for him, and + esteem him likewise. I know him to be a skilful and expert + surgeon, and also a good man; and I would do a great deal to + serve him or to be of use to him, if I had it in my power to + do so. But I think on this occasion he has spoken rashly, and + I fear foolishly and improperly. I hope he had no bad + intention--I am sure he had not. But the petitioner (for whom + I have likewise a great respect, because I knew his father, + who was a very respectable baker in Edinburgh, and supplied + my family with bread, and very good bread it was, and for + which his accounts were regularly discharged), it seems, has + a Clock or a Beetle, I think it is called a Diamond Beetle, + which he is very fond of, and has a fancy for, and the + defender has compared it to a Louse, or a Bug, or a Flea, or + a worse thing of that kind, with a view to render it + despicable or ridiculous, and the petitioner so likewise, as + the proprietor or owner thereof. It is said that this is a + Louse _in fact_, and that the _veritas convicii excusat_; and + mention is made of a decision in the case of Chalmers _v._ + Douglas. I have always had a great veneration for the + decisions of your Lordships; and I am sure will always + continue to have while I sit here; but that case was + determined by a very small majority, and I have heard your + Lordships mention it on various occasions, and you have + always desiderated the propriety of it, and I think have + departed from it in some instances. I remember the + circumstances of the case well:--Helen Chalmers lived in + Musselburgh, and the defender, Mrs. Douglas, lived in + Fisherrow; and at that time there was much intercourse + between the genteel inhabitants of Fisherrow, and + Musselburgh, and Inveresk, and likewise Newbigging; and there + were balls, or dances, or assemblies every fortnight, or + oftener, and also sometimes I believe every week; and there + were card-parties, assemblies once a fortnight, or oftener; + and the young people danced there also, and others played at + cards, and there were various refreshments, such as tea and + coffee, and butter and bread, and I believe, but I am not + sure, porter and negus, and likewise small beer. And it was + at one of these assemblies that Mrs. Douglas called Mrs. + Chalmers very improper names. And Mrs. Chalmers brought an + action of defamation before the Commissaries, and it came by + advocation into this Court, and your Lordships allowed a + proof of the _veritas convicii_, and it lasted a very long + time, and in the end answered no good purpose even to the + defender herself, while it did much hurt to the pursuer's + character. I am therefore for REFUSING such a proof in this + case, and I think the petitioner in this case and his Beetle + have been slandered, and the petition ought to be seen. + + "LORD METHVEN.--If I understand this--a--a--a--interlocutor, + it is not said that the--a--a--a--a--Egyptian Lice are + Beetles, but that they may be, or--a--a--a--a--resemble + Beetles. I am therefore for sending the process to the + Ordinary to ascertain the fact, as I think it depends upon + that whether there be--a--a--a--a--_convicium_ or not. I + think also the petitioner should be ordained + to--a--a--a--produce his Beetle, and the defender an Egyptian + Louse or _Pediculus_, and if he has not one, that he should + take a diligence--a--a--a--against havers to recover Lice of + various kinds; and these may be remitted to Dr. Monro, or Mr. + Playfair, or to some other naturalist, to report upon + the subject. + + "Agreed to." + + This is clearly a Reminiscence of a bygone state of matters + in the Court of Session. I think every reader in our day, of + the once famous Beetle case, will come to the conclusion + that, making all due allowance for the humorous embellishment + of the description, and even for some exaggeration of + caricature, it describes what was once a real state of + matters, which, he will be sure, is real no more. The day of + Judges of the Balmuto-Hermand-Polkemmet class has passed + away, and is become a Scottish _Reminiscence_. Having thus + brought before my readers some Reminiscences of past times + from the Courts of Justice, let me advert to one which + belongs to, or was supposed to belong to, past days of our + Scottish universities. It is now a matter of tradition. But + an idea prevailed, whether correctly or incorrectly, some + eighty or a hundred years ago, that at northern colleges + degrees were regularly sold, and those who could pay the + price obtained them, without reference to the merits or + attainments of those on whom they were conferred. We have + heard of divers jokes being passed on those who were supposed + to have received such academical honours, as well as on those + who had given them. It is said Dr Samuel Johnson joined in + this sarcastic humour. But his prejudices both against + Scotland and Scottish literature were well known. Colman, in + his amusing play of the "Heir at Law," makes his Dr. Pangloss + ludicrously describe his receiving an LL.D. degree, on the + grounds of his own celebrity (as he had never seen the + college), and his paying the heads one pound fifteen + shillings and threepence three farthings as a handsome + compliment to them on receiving his diploma. Colman certainly + had studied at a northern university. But he might have gone + into the idea in fun. However this may be, an anecdote is + current in the east of Scotland, which is illustrative of + this real or supposed state of matters, to which we may + indeed apply the Italian phrase that if "non vero" it is "ben + trovato." The story is this:--An East Lothian minister, + accompanied by his man, who acted as betheral of his parish, + went over to a northern university to purchase his degree, + and on their return home he gave strict charge to his man, + that as now he was invested with academical honour, he was to + be sure to say, if any one asked for the minister, "O yes, + the Doctor is at home, or the Doctor is in the study, or the + Doctor is out, as the case might be." The man at once + acquiesced in the propriety of this observance on account of + his master's newly-acquired dignity. But he quietly added, + "Ay, ay, minister; an' if ony are speirs for me, the servants + maun be sure to say, Oh, the Doctor's in the stable, or the + Doctor's in the kitchen, or the Doctor's in the garden or the + field." "What do you mean, Dauvid?" exclaimed his astonished + master; "what can _you_ have to do with Doctor?" "Weel, ye + see, sir," said David, looking very knowing, "when ye got + your degree, I thought that as I had saved a little money, I + couldna lay it out better, as being betheral of the church, + than tak out a degree to mysell." The story bears upon the + practice, whether a real or a supposed one; and we may fairly + say that under such principals as Shairp, Tulloch, Campbell, + Barclay, who now adorn the Scottish universities, we have a + guarantee that such reports must continue to be Reminiscence + and traditional only. + +FOOTNOTES: + +[42] Bear. + +[43] Rev. R. Scott of Cranwell. + +[44] I have derived some information from a curious book, "Kay's +Portraits," 2 vols. The work is scarcely known in England, and is +becoming rare in Scotland. "Nothing can be more valuable in the way of +engraved portraits than these representations of the distinguished men +who adorned Edinburgh in the latter part of the eighteenth +century."--_Chambers_. + +[45] Origin and Progress of Language. + +[46] Douglas' Peerage, vol. i. p. 22. + +[47] The version I have given of this amusing burlesque was revised by +the late Mr. Pagan, Cupar-Fife, and corrected from his own manuscript +copy, which he had procured from authentic sources about forty +years ago. + +[48] His Lordship usually pronounced _I am_--_Aum_. + + + +CHAPTER THE SIXTH. + +ON HUMOUR PROCEEDING FROM SCOTTISH EXPRESSIONS, INCLUDING SCOTTISH +PROVERBS. + +We come next to Reminiscences which are chiefly connected with +peculiarities of our Scottish LANGUAGE, whether contained in words or in +expressions. I am quite aware that the difference between the anecdotes +belonging to this division and to the last division termed "Wit and +Humour" is very indistinct, and must, in fact, in many cases, be quite +arbitrary. Much of what we enjoy most in Scottish stories is not on +account of wit properly so called, in the speaker, but I should say +rather from the odd and unexpected view which is taken of some matter, +or from the quaint and original turn of the expression made use of, or +from the simple and matter-of-fact reference made to circumstances which +are unusual. I shall not, therefore, be careful to preserve any strict +line of separation between this division and the next. Each is +conversant with what is amusing and with what is Scotch. What we have +now chiefly to illustrate by suitable anecdotes is peculiarities of +Scottish language--its various humorous turns and odd expressions. + +We have now to consider stories where words and expressions, which are +peculiarly Scotch, impart the humour and the point. Sometimes they are +altogether incapable of being rendered in other language. As, for +example, a parishioner in an Ayrshire village, meeting his pastor, who +had just returned after a considerable absence on account of ill +health, congratulated him on his convalescence, and added, anticipatory +of the pleasure he would have in hearing him again, "I'm unco yuckie to +hear a blaud o' your gab." This is an untranslatable form of saying how +glad he should be to hear his minister's voice again speaking to him the +words of salvation and of peace from the pulpit. + +The two following are good examples of that Scottish style of expression +which has its own character. They are kindly sent by Sir Archibald +Dunbar. The first illustrates Scottish acute discernment. A certain +titled lady, well known around her country town for her long-continued +and extensive charities, which are not withheld from those who least +deserve them, had a few years since, by the unexpected death of her +brother and of his only son, become possessor of a fine estate. The news +soon spread in the neighbourhood, and a group of old women were +overheard in the streets of Elgin discussing the fact. One of them said, +"Ay, she may prosper, for she has baith the prayers of the good and +of the bad." + +The second anecdote is a delightful illustration of Mrs. Hamilton's +_Cottagers of Glenburnie_, and of the old-fashioned Scottish pride in +the _midden_. About twenty years ago, under the apprehension of cholera, +committees of the most influential inhabitants of the county of Moray +were formed to enforce a more complete cleansing of its towns and +villages, and to induce the cottagers to remove their dunghills or +dung-pits from too close a proximity to their doors or windows. One +determined woman, on the outskirts of the town of Forres, no doubt with +her future potato crop in view, met the M.P. who headed one of these +committees, thus, "Noo, Major, ye may tak our lives, but ye'll no tak +our middens." + +The truth is, many of the peculiarities which marked Scottish society +departed with the disuse of the Scottish dialect in the upper ranks. I +recollect a familiar example of this, which I may well term a +Reminiscence. At a party assembled in a county house, the Earl of Elgin +(grandfather of the present Earl) came up to the tea-table, where Mrs. +Forbes of Medwyn, one of the finest examples of the past Scottish +_lady_, was sitting, evidently much engaged with her occupation. "You +are fond of your tea, Mrs. Forbes?" The reply was quite a characteristic +one, and a pure reminiscence of such a place and such interlocutors; +"'Deed, my Lord, I wadna gie my tea for your yerldom." + +My aunt, the late Lady Burnett of Leys, was one of the class of Scottish +ladies I have referred to;--thoroughly a good woman and a gentlewoman, +but in dialect quite Scottish. For example, being shocked at the sharp +Aberdonian pronunciation adopted by her children, instead of the broader +Forfarshire model in which she had been brought up, she thus adverted to +their manner of calling the _floor_ of the room where they were playing: +"What gars ye ca' it '_fleer_?' canna ye ca' it '_flure_?' But I needna +speak; Sir Robert winna let me correc' your language." + +In respect of language, no doubt, a very important change has taken +place in Scotland during the last seventy years, and which, I believe, +influences, in a greater degree than many persons would imagine, the +turn of thought and general modes and aspects of society. In losing the +old racy Scottish tongue, it seems as if much originality of _character_ +was lost. I suppose at one time the two countries of England and +Scotland were considered as almost speaking different languages, and I +suppose also, that from the period of the union of the crowns the +language has been assimilating. We see the process of assimilation going +on, and ere long amongst persons of education and birth very little +difference will be perceptible. With regard to that class, a great +change has taken place in my own time. I recollect old Scottish ladies +and gentlemen who really _spoke Scotch_. It was not, mark me, speaking +English with an accent. No; it was downright Scotch. Every tone and +every syllable was Scotch. For example, I recollect old Miss Erskine of +Dun, a fine specimen of a real lady, and daughter of an ancient Scottish +house, so speaking. Many people now would not understand her. She was +always _the lady_, notwithstanding her dialect, and to none could the +epithet vulgar be less appropriately applied. I speak of more than forty +years ago, and yet I recollect her accost to me as well as if it were +yesterday: "I didna ken ye were i' the toun." Taking word and accents +together, an address how totally unlike what we now meet with in +society. Some of the old Scottish words which we can remember are +charming; but how strange they would sound to the ears of the present +generation! Fancy that in walking from church, and discussing the +sermon, a lady of rank should now express her opinion of it by the +description of its being, "but a hummelcorn discourse." Many living +persons can remember Angus old ladies who would say to their nieces and +daughters, "Whatna hummeldoddie o' a mutch hae ye gotten?" meaning a +flat and low-crowned cap. In speaking of the dryness of the soil on a +road in Lanarkshire, a farmer said, "It stoors in an oor[49]." How would +this be as tersely translated into English? The late Duchess of Gordon +sat at dinner next an English gentleman who was carving, and who made it +a boast that he was thoroughly master of the Scottish language. Her +Grace turned to him and said, "Rax me a spaul o' that bubbly jock[50]." +The unfortunate man was completely _nonplussed_. A Scottish gentleman +was entertaining at his house an English cousin who professed himself as +rather knowing in the language of the north side of the Tweed. He asked +him what he supposed to be the meaning of the expression, "ripin the +ribs[51]." To which he readily answered, "Oh, it describes a very fat +man." I profess myself an out-and-out Scotchman. I have strong national +partialities--call them if you will national prejudices. I cherish a +great love of old Scottish language. Some of our pure Scottish ballad +poetry is unsurpassed in any language for grace and pathos. How +expressive, how beautiful are its phrases! You can't translate them. +Take an example of power in a Scottish expression, to describe with +tenderness and feeling what is in human life. Take one of our most +familiar phrases; as thus:--We meet an old friend, we talk over bygone +days, and remember many who were dear to us both, once bright, and +young, and gay, of whom some remain, honoured, prosperous, and happy--of +whom some are under a cloud of misfortune or disgrace--some are broken +in health and spirits--some sunk into the grave; we recall old familiar +places--old companions, pleasures, and pursuits; as Scotchmen our +hearts are touched with these remembrances of + + AULD LANG SYNE. + +Match me the phrase in English. You can't translate it. The fitness and +the beauty lie in the felicity of the language. Like many happy +expressions, it is not transferable into another tongue, just like the +"simplex munditiis" of Horace, which describes the natural grace of +female elegance, or the [Greek: achaexithmon gelasma] of AEschylus, which +describes the bright sparkling of the ocean in the sun. + +I think the power of Scottish dialect was happily exemplified by the +late Dr. Adam, rector of the High School of Edinburgh, in his +translation of the Horatian expression "desipere in loco," which he +turned by the Scotch phrase "Weel-timed daffin';" a translation, +however, which no one but a Scotchman could appreciate. The following +humorous Scottish translation of an old Latin aphorism has been assigned +to the late Dr. Hill of St. Andrews: "_Qui bene cepit dimidium facti +fecit_" the witty Principal expressed in Scotch, "Weel saipet (well +soaped) is half shaven." + +What mere _English_ word could have expressed a distinction so well in +such a case as the following? I heard once a lady in Edinburgh objecting +to a preacher that she did not understand him. Another lady, his great +admirer, insinuated that probably he was too "deep" for her to follow. +But her ready answer was, "Na, na, he's no just deep, but he's +_drumly_[52]" + +We have a testimony to the value of our Scottish language from a late +illustrious Chancellor of the University of Edinburgh, the force and +authority of which no one will be disposed to question. Lord Brougham, +in speaking of improvements upon the English language, makes these +striking remarks:-- + +"The pure and classical language of Scotland must on no account be +regarded as a provincial dialect, any more than French was so regarded +in the reign of Henry V., or Italian in that of the first Napoleon, or +Greek under the Roman Empire. Nor is it to be in any manner of way +considered as a corruption of the Saxon; on the contrary, it contains +much of the old and genuine Saxon, with an intermixture from the +Northern nations, as Danes and Norse, and some, though a small portion, +from the Celtic. But in whatever way composed, or from whatever sources +arising, it is a national language, used by the whole people in their +early years, by many learned and gifted persons throughout life, and in +which are written the laws of the Scotch, their judicial proceedings, +their ancient history; above all, their poetry. + +"There can be no doubt that the English language would greatly gain by +being enriched with a number both of words and of phrases, or turns of +expression, now peculiar to the Scotch. It was by such a process that +the Greek became the first of tongues, as well written as spoken.... + +"Would it not afford means of enriching and improving the English +language, if full and accurate glossaries of improved Scotch words and +phrases--those successfully used by the best writers, both in prose and +verse--were given, with distinct explanation and reference to +authorities? This has been done in France and other countries, where +some dictionaries accompany the English, in some cases with Scotch +synonyms, in others with varieties of expression."--_Installation +Address_, p. 63. + +The Scotch, as a people, from their more guarded and composed method of +speaking, are not so liable to fall into that figure of speech for which +our Irish neighbours are celebrated--usually called the Bull; some +specimens, however, of that confusion of thought, very like a bull, have +been recorded of Scottish interlocutors. + +Of this the two following examples have been sent to me by a kind +friend. + +It is related of a Scottish judge (who has supplied several anecdotes of +Scottish stories), that on going to consult a dentist, who, as is usual, +placed him in the professional chair, and told his lordship that he must +let him put his fingers into his mouth, he exclaimed, "Na! na! ye'll +aiblins _bite me_." + +A Scottish laird, singularly enough the grandson of the learned judge +mentioned above, when going his round to canvass for the county, at the +time when the electors were chiefly confined to resident proprietors, +was asked at one house where he called if he would not take some +refreshment, hesitated, and said, "I doubt it's treating, and may be +ca'd _bribery_." + +But a still more amusing specimen of this figure of speech was supplied +by an honest Highlander, in the days of sedan chairs. For the benefit of +my young readers I may describe the sedan chair as a comfortable little +carriage fixed to two poles, and carried by two men, one behind and one +before. A dowager lady of quality had gone out to dinner in one of these +"leathern conveniences," and whilst she herself enjoyed the hospitality +of the mansion up-stairs, her bearers were profusely entertained +downstairs, and partook of the abundant refreshment offered to them. +When my lady was to return, and had taken her place in the sedan, her +bearers raised the chair, but she found no progress was made--she felt +herself sway first to one side, then to the other, and soon came bump +upon the ground, when Donald behind was heard shouting to Donald before +(for the bearers of sedans were always Highlanders), "Let her down, +Donald, man, _for she's drunk_." + +I cannot help thinking that a change of national language involves to +some extent change of national character. Numerous examples of great +power in Scottish Phraseology, to express the picturesque, the feeling, +the wise, and the humorous, might be taken from the works of Robert +Burns, Ferguson, or Allan Ramsay, and which lose their charms altogether +when _unscottified_. The speaker certainly seems to take a strength and +character from his words. We must now look for specimens of this racy +and expressive tongue in the more retired parts of the country. It is no +longer to be found in high places. It has disappeared from the social +circles of our cities. I cannot, however, omit calling my reader's +attention to a charming specimen of Scottish prose and of Scottish +humour of our own day, contained in a little book, entitled +"_Mystifications_" by Clementina Stirling Graham. The scenes described +in that volume are matters of pleasing reminiscence, and to some of us +who still remain "will recall that blithe and winning face, sagacious +and sincere, that kindly, cheery voice, that rich and quiet laugh, that +mingled sense and sensibility, which met, and still to our happiness +meet, in her who, with all her gifts, never gratified her consciousness +of these powers so as to give pain to any human being[53]." These +words, written more than ten years ago, might have been penned +yesterday; and those who, like myself, have had the privilege of seeing +the authoress presiding in her beautiful mansion of Duntrune, will not +soon forget how happy, how gracious, and how young, old age may be. + + "No fears to beat away--no strife to heal; + The past unsighed for, and the future sure." + +In my early days the intercourse with the peasantry of Forfarshire, +Kincardineshire, and especially Deeside, was most amusing--not that the +things said were so much out of the common, as that the language in +which they were conveyed was picturesque, and odd, and taking. And +certainly it does appear to me that as the language grows more uniform +and conventional, less marked and peculiar in its dialect and +expressions, so does the character of those who speak it become so. I +have a rich sample of Mid-Lothian Scotch from a young friend in the +country, who describes the conversation of an old woman on the property +as amusing her by such specimens of genuine Scottish raciness and +humour. On one occasion, for instance, the young lady had told her +humble friend that she was going to Ireland, and would have to undergo a +sea voyage. "Weel, noo, ye dinna mean that! Ance I thocht to gang across +to tither side o' the Queensferry wi' some ither folks to a fair, ye +ken; but juist whene'er I pat my fit in the boat, the boat gae wallop, +and my heart gae a loup, and I thocht I'd gang oot o' my judgment +athegither; so says I, Na, na, ye gang awa by yoursells to tither side, +and I'll bide here till sic times as ye come awa back." When we hear +our Scottish language at home, and spoken by our own countrymen, we are +not so much struck with any remarkable effects; but it takes a far more +impressive character when heard amongst those who speak a different +tongue, and when encountered in other lands. I recollect hearing the +late Sir Robert Liston expressing this feeling in his own case. When our +ambassador at Constantinople, some Scotchmen had been recommended to him +for a purpose of private or of government business; and Sir Robert was +always ready to do a kind thing for a countryman. He found them out in a +barber's shop, waiting for being shaved in turn. One came in rather +late, and seeing he had scarcely room at the end of the seat, addressed +his countryman, "Neebour, wad ye sit a bit _wast_?" What strong +associations must have been called up, by hearing in an eastern land +such an expression in Scottish tones. + +We may observe here, that marking the course any person is to take, or +the direction in which any object is to be met with, by the points of +the compass, was a prevailing practice amongst the older Scottish race. +There could hardly be a more ludicrous application of the test, than was +furnished by an honest Highlander in describing the direction which his +medicine would _not_ take. Jean Gumming of Altyre, who, in common with +her three sisters, was a true soeur de charite, was one day taking her +rounds as usual, visiting the poor sick, among whom there was a certain +Donald MacQueen, who had been some time confined to his bed. Miss +Gumming, after asking him how he felt, and finding that he was "no +better," of course inquired if he had taken the medicine which she had +sent him; "Troth no, me lady," he replied. "But why not, Donald?" she +answered; "it was _very wrong_; how can you expect to get better if you +do not help yourself with the remedies which heaven provides for you?" +"_V_right or _V_rang," said Donald, "it wadna gang _wast_ in spite o' +me." In all the north country, it is always said, "I'm ganging east or +west," etc., and it happened that Donald on his sick bed was lying east +and west, his feet pointing to the latter direction, hence his reply to +indicate that he could not swallow the medicine! + +We may fancy the amusement of the officers of a regiment in the West +Indies, at the innocent remark of a young lad who had just joined from +Scotland. On meeting at dinner, his salutation to his Colonel was, +"Anither het day, Cornal," as if "het days" were in Barbadoes few and +far between, as they were in his dear old stormy cloudy Scotland. Or +take the case of a Scottish saying, which indicated at once the dialect +and the economical habits of a hardy and struggling race. A young +Scotchman, who had been some time in London, met his friend recently +come up from the north to pursue his fortune in the great metropolis. On +discussing matters connected with their new life in London, the more +experienced visitor remarked upon the greater _expenses_ there than in +the retired Scottish town which they had left. "Ay," said the other, +sighing over the reflection, "when ye get cheenge for a saxpence here, +it's soon slippit awa'." I recollect a story of my father's which +illustrates the force of dialect, although confined to the inflections +of a single monosyllable. On riding home one evening, he passed a +cottage or small farm-house, where there was a considerable assemblage +of people, and an evident incipient merry-making for some festive +occasion. On asking one of the lasses standing about, what it was, she +answered, "Ou, it's just a wedding o' Jock Thamson and Janet Frazer." To +the question, "Is the bride rich?" there was a plain quiet "Na." "Is she +young?" a more emphatic and decided "Naa!" but to the query, "Is she +bonny?" a most elaborate and prolonged shout of "Naaa!" + +It has been said that the Scottish dialect is peculiarly powerful in its +use of _vowels_, and the following dialogue between a shopman and a +customer has been given as a specimen. The conversation relates to a +plaid hanging at the shop door-- + +_Cus_. (inquiring the material), Oo? (wool?) + +_Shop_. Ay, oo (yes, of wool). + +_Cus_. A' oo? (all wool?) + +_Shop_. Ay, a' oo (yes, all wool). + +_Cus_. A' ae oo? (all same wool?) + +_Shop_. Ay a' ae oo (yes, all same wool). + +An amusing anecdote of a pithy and jocular reply, comprised in one +syllable, is recorded of an eccentric legal Scottish functionary of the +last century. An advocate, of whose professional qualifications he had +formed rather a low estimate, was complaining to him of being passed +over in a recent appointment to the bench, and expressed his sense of +the injustice with which he had been treated. He was very indignant at +his claims and merit being overlooked in their not choosing him for the +new judge, adding with much acrimony, "And I can tell you they might +have got a 'waur[54].'" To which, as if merely coming over the +complainant's language again, the answer was a grave "Whaur[55]?" The +merit of the impertinence was, that it sounded as if it were merely a +repetition of his friend's last words, waur and whaur. It was as if +"_echo_ answered whaur?" As I have said, the oddity and acuteness of +the speaker arose from the manner of expression, not from the thing +said. In fact, the same thing said in plain English would be mere +commonplace. I recollect being much amused with a dialogue between a +late excellent relative of mine and his man, the chief manager of a farm +which he had just taken, and, I suspect in a good measure manager of the +_farmer_ as well. At any rate he committed to this acute overseer all +the practical details; and on the present occasion had sent him to +market to dispose of a cow and a pony, a simple enough transaction, and +with a simple enough result. The cow was, brought back, the pony was +sold. But the man's description of it forms the point. "Well, John, have +you sold the cow?" "Na, but I _grippit_ a chiel for the powny!" +"_Grippit_" was here most expressive. Indeed, this word has a +significance hardly expressed by any English one, and used to be very +prevalent to indicate keen and forcible tenacity of possession; thus a +character noted for avarice or sharp looking to self-interest was termed +"grippy." In mechanical contrivances, anything taking a close adherence +was called having a gude _grip_. I recollect in boyish days, when on +Deeside taking wasp-nests, an old man looking on was sharply stung by +one, and his description was, "Ane o' them's grippit me fine." The +following had an indescribable piquancy, which arose from the +_Scotticism_ of the terms and the manners. Many years ago, when +accompanying a shooting party on the Grampians, not with a gun like the +rest, but with a botanical box for collecting specimens of mountain +plants, the party had got very hot, and very tired, and very cross. On +the way home, whilst sitting down to rest, a gamekeeper sort of +attendant, and a character in his way, said, "I wish I was in the +dining-room of Fasque." Our good cousin the Rev. Mr. Wilson, minister +of Farnel, who liked well a quiet shot at the grouse, rather testily +replied, "Ye'd soon be _kickit_ out o' that;" to which the other +replied, not at all daunted, "Weel, weel, then I wadna be far frae the +kitchen." A quaint and characteristic reply I recollect from another +farm-servant. My eldest brother had just been constructing a piece of +machinery which was driven by a stream of water running through the home +farmyard. There was a thrashing machine, a winnowing machine, and +circular saw for splitting trees into paling, and other contrivances of +a like kind. Observing an old man, who had long been about the place, +looking very attentively at all that was going on, he said, "Wonderful +things people can do now, Robby!" "Ay," said Robby; "indeed, Sir +Alexander, I'm thinking gin Solomon were alive noo he'd be thocht +naething o'!" + +The two following derive their force entirely from the Scottish turn of +the expressions. Translated into English, they would lose all point--at +least, much of the point which they now have:-- + +At the sale of an antiquarian gentleman's effects in Roxburghshire, +which Sir Walter Scott happened to attend, there was one little article, +a Roman _patina_, which occasioned a good deal of competition, and was +eventually knocked down to the distinguished baronet at a high price. +Sir Walter was excessively amused during the time of bidding to observe +how much it excited the astonishment of an old woman, who had evidently +come there to buy culinary utensils on a more economical principle. "If +the parritch-pan," she at last burst out--"If the parritch-pan gangs at +that, what will the kail-pat gang for?" + +An ancestor of Sir Walter Scott joined the Stuart Prince in 1715, and, +with his brother, was engaged in that unfortunate adventure which ended +in a skirmish and captivity at Preston. It was the fashion of those +times for all persons of the rank of gentlemen to wear scarlet +waistcoats. A ball had struck one of the brothers, and carried part of +this dress into his body, and in this condition he was taken prisoner +with a number of his companions, and stripped, as was too often the +practice in those remorseless wars. Thus wounded, and nearly naked, +having only a shirt on, and an old sack about him, the ancestor of the +great poet was sitting, along with his brother and a hundred and fifty +unfortunate gentlemen, in a granary at Preston. The wounded man fell +sick, as the story goes, and vomited the scarlet cloth which the ball +had passed into the wound. "O man, Wattie," cried his brother, "if you +have a wardrobe in your wame, I wish you would vomit me a pair o' +breeks." But, after all, it was amongst the old ladies that the great +abundance of choice pungent Scottish expressions, such as you certainly +do not meet with in these days, was to be sought. In their position of +society, education either in England, or education conducted by English +teachers, has so spread in Scottish families, and intercourse with the +south has been so increased, that all these colloquial peculiarities are +fast disappearing. Some of the ladies of this older school felt some +indignation at the change which they lived to see was fast going on. One +of them being asked if an individual whom she had lately seen was +"Scotch," answered with some bitterness, "I canna say; ye a' speak sae +_genteel_ now that I dinna ken wha's Scotch." It was not uncommon to +find, in young persons, examples, some years ago, of an attachment to +the Scottish dialect, like that of the old lady. In the life of P. +Tytler, lately published, there is an account of his first return to +Scotland from a school in England. His family were delighted with his +appearance, manners, and general improvement; but a sister did not share +this pleasure unmixed, for being found in tears, and the remark being +made, "Is he not charming?" her reply was, in great distress, "Oh yes, +but he speaks English!" + +The class of old Scottish ladies, marked by so many peculiarities, +generally lived in provincial towns, and never dreamt of going from +home. Many had never been in London, or had even crossed the Tweed. But +as Lord Cockburn's experience goes back further than mine, and as he had +special opportunities of being acquainted with their characteristic +peculiarities, I will quote his animated description at page 57 of his +_Memorials_. "There was a singular race of old Scotch ladies. They were +a delightful set--strong-headed, warm-hearted, and high-spirited--merry +even in solitude; very resolute; indifferent about the modes and habits +of the modern world, and adhering to their own ways, so as to stand out +like primitive rocks above ordinary society. Their prominent qualities +of sense, humour, affection, and spirit, were embodied in curious +outsides, for they all dressed, and spoke, and did exactly as they +chose. Their language, like their habits, entirely Scotch, but without +any other vulgarity than what perfect naturalness is sometimes +mistaken for[56]." + +This is a masterly description of a race now all but passed away. I have +known several of them in my early days; and amongst them we must look +for the racy Scottish peculiarities of diction and of expression which, +with them, are also nearly gone. Lord Cockburn has given some +illustrations of these peculiarities; and I have heard others, +especially connected with Jacobite partialities, of which I say nothing, +as they are in fact rather _strong_ for such a work as this. One, +however, I heard lately as coming from a Forfarshire old lady of this +class, which bears upon the point of "resolute" determination referred +to in the learned judge's description. She had been very positive in the +disclaiming of some assertion which had been attributed to her, and on +being asked if she had not written it, or something very like it, she +replied, "Na, na; I never _write_ onything of consequence--I may deny +what I say, but I canna deny what I write." + +Mrs. Baird of Newbyth, the mother of our distinguished countryman the +late General Sir David Baird, was always spoken of as a grand specimen +of the class. When the news arrived from India of the gallant but +unfortunate action of '84 against Hyder Ali, in which her son, then +Captain Baird, was engaged, it was stated that he and other officers had +been taken prisoners and chained together two and two. The friends were +careful in breaking such sad intelligence to the mother of Captain +Baird. When, however, she was made fully to understand the position of +her son and his gallant companions, disdaining all weak and useless +expressions of her own grief, and knowing well the restless and athletic +habits of her son, all she said was, "Lord pity the chiel that's chained +to our Davie!" + +It is only due to the memory of "our Davie," however, to add that the +"chiel" to whom he was chained, had, in writing home to his friends, +borne the highest testimony to the kindness and consideration of Captain +Baird, which he exercised towards him in this uncomfortable alliance. +General Baird was a first-rate officer, and a fine noble character. He +left home for active service so soon (before he was fifteen) that his +education had necessarily been very imperfect. This deficiency he had +always himself through life deeply regretted. A military friend, and +great admirer of Sir David, used jocularly to tell a story of him--that +having finished the despatch which must carry home the news of his great +action, the capture of Seringapatam, as he was preparing to sign it in +great form, he deliberately took off his coat. "Why do you take off your +coat?" said his friend. To which the General quietly answered, "Oh, it's +to turn the muckle D in Dauvid." + +The ladies of this class had certainly no affectation in speaking of +those who came under their displeasure, even when life and death were +concerned. I had an anecdote illustrative of this characteristic in a +well-known old lady of the last century, Miss Johnstone of Westerhall. +She had been extremely indignant that, on the death of her brother, his +widow had proposed to sell off the old furniture of Westerhall. She was +attached to it from old associations, and considered the parting with it +little short of sacrilege. The event was, however, arrested by death, +or, as she describes the result, "The furniture was a' to be roupit, and +we couldna persuade her. But before the sale cam on, in God's gude +providence she just clinkit aff hersell." Of this same Miss Johnstone +another characteristic anecdote has been preserved in the family. She +came into possession of Hawkhill, near Edinburgh, and died there. When +dying, a tremendous storm of rain and thunder came on, so as to shake +the house. In her own quaint eccentric spirit, and with no thought of +profane or light allusions, she looked up, and, listening to the storm, +quietly remarked, in reference to her departure, "Ech, sirs! what a +nicht for me to be fleein' through the air!" Of fine acute sarcasm I +recollect hearing an expression from a _modern_ sample of the class, a +charming character, but only to a certain degree answering to the +description of the _older_ generation. Conversation turning, and with +just indignation, on the infidel remarks which had been heard from a +certain individual, and on his irreverent treatment of Holy Scripture, +all that this lady condescended to say of him was, "Gey impudent of +him, I think." + +A recorded reply of old Lady Perth to a French gentleman is quaint and +characteristic. They had been discussing the respective merits of the +cookery of each country. The Frenchman offended the old Scottish peeress +by some disparaging remarks on Scottish dishes, and by highly preferring +those of France. All she would answer was, "Weel, weel, some fowk like +parritch and some like paddocks[57]." + +Of this older race--the ladies who were, aged, fifty years ago--no +description could be given in bolder or stronger outline than that which +I have quoted from Lord Cockburn. I would pretend to nothing more than +giving a few further illustrative details from my own experience, which +may assist the representation by adding some practical realities to +the picture. + +Several of them whom I knew in my early days certainly answered to many +of the terms made use of by his lordship. Their language and expressions +had a zest and peculiarity which are gone, and which would not, I fear, +do for modern life and times. + +I have spoken of Miss Erskine of Dun, which is near Montrose. She, +however, resided in Edinburgh. But those I knew best had lived many +years in the then retired society of a country town. Some were my own +relations; and in boyish days (for they had not generally much patience +with boys) were looked up to with considerable awe as very formidable +personages. Their characters and modes of expression in many respects +remarkably corresponded with Lord Cockburn's idea of the race. There was +a dry Scottish humour which we fear their successors do not inherit. One +of these Montrose ladies, Miss Nelly Fullerton, had many anecdotes told +of her quaint ways and sayings. Walking in the street one day, slippery +from frost, she fairly fell down. A young officer with much politeness +came forward and picked her up, earnestly asking her at the same time, +"I hope ma'am, you are no worse?" to which she very drily answered, +looking at him very steadily, "'Deed, sir, I'm just as little the +better." A few days after, she met her military supporter in a shop. He +was a fine tall youth, upwards of six feet high, and by way of making +some grateful recognition for his late polite attention, she eyed him +from head to foot, and as she was of the opinion of the old Scotch lady +who declared she "aye liked bonny fowk," she viewed her young friend +with much satisfaction, but which she only evinced by the quaint remark, +"Od, ye're a lang lad; God gie ye grace." + +I had from a relative or intimate friend of two sisters of this school, +well known about Glasgow, an odd account of what it seems, from their +own statement, had passed between them at a country house, where they +had attended a sale by auction. As the business of the day went on, a +dozen of silver spoons had to be disposed of; and before they were put +up for competition, they were, according to the usual custom, handed +round for inspection to the company. When returned into the hands of +the auctioneer, he found only eleven. In great wrath, he ordered the +door to be shut, that no one might escape, and insisted on every one +present being searched to discover the delinquent. One of the sisters, +in consternation, whispered to the other, "Esther, ye hae nae gotten the +spune?" to which she replied, "Na; but I hae gotten Mrs. Siddons in my +pocket." She had been struck by a miniature of the great actress, and +had quietly pocketed it. The cautious reply of the sister was, "Then +just drop her, Esther." One of the sisterhood, a connection of my own, +had much of this dry Scottish humour. She had a lodging in the house of +a respectable grocer; and on her niece most innocently asking, "if she +was not very fond of her landlord," in reference to the excellence of +her apartments and the attention he paid to her comfort, she demurred to +the question on the score of its propriety, by replying, "Fond of my +landlord! that would be an _unaccountable_ fondness." + +An amusing account was given of an interview and conversation between +this lady and the provost of Montrose. She had demurred at paying some +municipal tax with which she had been charged, and the provost, anxious +to prevent her getting into difficulty on the subject, kindly called to +convince her of the fairness of the claim, and the necessity of paying +it. In his explanation he referred back to his own bachelor days when a +similar payment had been required from him. "I assure you, ma'am," he +said, "when I was in your situation I was called upon in a similar way +for this tax;" to which she replied, in quiet scorn, "In my situation! +an' whan were ye in my situation?--an' auld maid leevin' in a flat wi' +an ae lass." But the complaints of such imposts were urged in a very +humorous manner by another Montrose old lady, Miss Helen Carnegy of +Craigo; she hated paying taxes, and always pretended to misunderstand +their nature. One day, receiving a notice of such payment signed by the +provost (Thorn), she broke out: "I dinna understand thae taxes; but I +just think that when Mrs. Thorn wants a new gown, the provost sends me a +tax paper!" The good lady's naive rejection of the idea that she could +be in any sense "fond of her landlord," already referred to, was +somewhat in unison with a similar feeling recorded to have been +expressed by the late Mr. Wilson, the celebrated Scottish vocalist. He +was taking lessons from the late Mr. Finlay Dun, one of the most +accomplished musicians of the day. Mr. Dun had just returned from Italy, +and, impressed with admiration of the deep pathos, sentiment, and +passion of the Italian school of music, he regretted to find in his +pupil so lovely a voice and so much talent losing much of its effect for +want of feeling. Anxious, therefore, to throw into his friend's +performance something of the Italian expression, he proposed to bring it +out by this suggestion: "Now, Mr. Wilson, just suppose that I am your +lady love, and sing to me as you could imagine yourself doing were you +desirous of impressing her with your earnestness and affection." Poor +Mr. Wilson hesitated, blushed, and, under doubt how far such a +personification even in his case was allowable, at last remonstrated, +"Ay, Mr. Dun, ye forget I'm a married man!" A case has been reported of +a country girl, however, who thought it possible there might be an +excess in such scrupulous regard to appearances. On her marriage-day, +the youth to whom she was about to be united said to her in a triumphant +tone, "Weel, Jenny, haven't I been unco ceevil?" alluding to the fact +that during their whole courtship he had never even given her a kiss. +Her quiet reply was, "Ou, ay, man; _senselessly_ ceevil." + +One of these Montrose ladies and a sister lived together; and in a very +quiet way they were in the habit of giving little dinner-parties, to +which occasionally they invited their gentlemen friends. However, +gentlemen were not always to be had; and on one occasion, when such a +difficulty had occurred, they were talking over the matter with a +friend. The one lady seemed to consider such an acquisition almost +essential to the having a dinner at all. The other, who did not see the +same necessity, quietly adding, "But, indeed, oor Jean thinks a man +_perfect salvation_." + +Very much of the same class of remarks was the following sly observation +of one of the sisterhood. At a well-known tea-table in a country town in +Forfarshire, the events of the day, grave and gay, had been fully +discussed by the assembled sisterhood. The occasion was improved by an +elderly spinster, as follows:--"Weel, weel, sirs, these are solemn +events--death and marriage--but ye ken they're what we must a' come +till." "Eh, Miss Jeany! ye have been lang spared," was the arch reply of +a younger member. + +There was occasionally a pawky semi-sarcastic humour in the replies of +some of the ladies we speak of, that was quite irresistible, of which I +have from a friend a good illustration in an anecdote well known at the +time. A late well-known member of the Scottish bar, when a youth, was +somewhat of a dandy, and, I suppose, somewhat short and sharp in his +temper. He was going to pay a visit in the country, and was making a +great fuss about his preparing and putting up his habiliments. His old +aunt was much annoyed at all this bustle, and stopped him by the +somewhat contemptuous question, "Whar's this you're gaun, Bobby, that +ye mak sic a grand wark about yer claes?" The young man lost temper, and +pettishly replied, "I'm going to the devil." "'Deed, Robby, then," was +the quiet answer, "ye needna be sae nice, he'll juist tak' ye as +ye are." + +Ladies of this class had a quiet mode of expressing themselves on very +serious subjects, which indicated their quaint power of description, +rather than their want of feeling. Thus, of two sisters, when one had +died, it was supposed that she had injured herself by an imprudent +indulgence in strawberries and cream, of which she had partaken in the +country. A friend was condoling with the surviving sister, and, +expressing her sorrow, had added, "I had hoped your sister was to live +many years." To which her relative replied--"Leeve! hoo could she leeve? +she juist felled[58] hersell at Craigo wi' straeberries and 'ream!" +However, she spoke with the same degree of coolness of her own decease. +For when her friend was comforting her in illness, by the hopes that she +would, after winter, enjoy again some of their country spring butter, +she exclaimed, without the slightest idea of being guilty of any +irreverence, "Spring butter! by that time I shall be buttering in +heaven." When really dying, and when friends were round her bed she +overheard one of them saying to another, "Her face has lost its colour; +it grows like a sheet of paper." The quaint spirit even then broke out +in the remark, "Then I'm sure it maun be _broon_ paper." A very +strong-minded lady of the class, and, in Lord Cockburn's language, +"indifferent about modes and habits[59]," had been asking from a lady +the character of a cook she was about to hire. The lady naturally +entered a little upon her moral qualifications, and described her as a +very decent woman; the response to which was, "Oh, d--n her decency; can +she make good collops?"--an answer which would somewhat surprise a lady +of Moray Place now, if engaged in a similar discussion of a +servant's merits. + +The Rev. Dr. Cook of Haddington supplies an excellent anecdote, of which +the point is in the dry Scottish answer: An old lady of the Doctor's +acquaintance, about seventy, sent for her medical attendant to consult +him about a sore throat, which had troubled her for some days. Her +medical man was ushered into her room, decked out with the now +prevailing fashion, a mustache and flowing beard. The old lady, after +exchanging the usual civilities, described her complaint to the worthy +son of AEsculapius. "Well," says he, "do you know, Mrs. Macfarlane, I +used to be much affected with the very same kind of sore throat, but +ever since I allowed my mustache and beard to grow, I have never been +troubled with it." "Aweel, aweel," said the old lady drily, "that may be +the case, but ye maun prescribe some other method for me to get quit o' +the sair throat; for ye ken, doctor, I canna adopt _that_ cure." + +Then how quaint the answer of old Mrs. Robison, widow of the eminent +professor of natural philosophy, and who entertained an inveterate +dislike to everything which she thought savoured of _cant_. She had +invited a gentleman to dinner on a particular day, and he had accepted, +with the reservation, "If I am spared."--"Weel, weel," said Mrs. +Robison; "if ye're deed, I'll no expect ye." + +I had two grand-aunts living at Montrose at that time--two Miss Ramsays +of Balmain. They were somewhat of the severe class---Nelly especially, +who was an object rather of awe than of affection. She certainly had a +very awful appearance to young apprehensions, from the strangeness of +her headgear. Ladies of this class Lord Cockburn has spoken of as +"having their peculiarities embodied in curious outsides, as they +dressed, spoke, and did exactly as they chose." As a sample of such +"curious outside and dress," my good aunt used to go about the house +with an immense pillow strapped over her head--warm but formidable. +These two maiden grand-aunts had invited their niece to pay them a +visit--an aunt of mine, who had made what they considered a very +imprudent marriage, and where considerable pecuniary privations were too +likely to accompany the step she had taken. The poor niece had to bear +many a taunt directed against her improvident union, as for +example:--One day she had asked for a piece of tape for some work she +had in hand as a young wife expecting to become a mother. Miss Nelly +said, with much point, "Ay, Kitty, ye shall get a bit knittin' (_i.e._ a +bit of tape). We hae a'thing; we're no married." It was this lady who, +by an inadvertent use of a term, showed what was passing in her mind in +a way which must have been quite transparent to the bystanders. At a +supper which she was giving, she was evidently much annoyed at the +reckless and clumsy manner in which a gentleman was operating upon a ham +which was at table, cutting out great lumps, and distributing them to +the company. The lady said, in a very querulous tone, "Oh, Mr. _Divot_, +will you help Mrs. So and So?"--divot being a provincial term for a turf +or sod cut out of the green, and the resemblance of it to the pieces +carved out by the gentleman evidently having taken possession of her +imagination. Mrs. Helen Carnegy of Craigo, already mentioned, was a +thorough specimen of this class. She lived in Montrose, and died in +1818, at the advanced age of ninety-one. She was a Jacobite, and very +aristocratic in her feelings, but on social terms with many burghers of +Montrose, or Munross as it was called. She preserved a very nice +distinction of addresses, suited to the different individuals in the +town, according as she placed them in the scale of her consideration. +She liked a party at quadrille, and sent out her servant every morning +to invite the ladies required to make up the game, and her directions +were graduated thus:--"Nelly, ye'll ging to Lady Carnegy's, and mak my +compliments, and ask the _honour_ of her ladyship's company, and that of +the Miss Carnegys, to tea this evening; and if they canna come, ging to +the Miss Mudies, and ask the _pleasure_ of their company; and if they +canna come, ye may ging to Miss Hunter and ask the _favour_ of her +company and if she canna come, ging to Lucky Spark and _bid her come_." + +A great confusion existed in the minds of some of those old-fashioned +ladies on the subject of modern inventions and usages. A Montrose old +lady protested against the use of steam-vessels, as counteracting the +decrees of Providence in going against wind and tide, vehemently +asserting, "I would hae naething to say to thae _im-pious_ vessels." +Another lady was equally discomposed by the introduction of gas, asking, +with much earnestness, "What's to become o' the puir whales'?" deeming +their interests materially affected by this superseding of their oil. A +lady of this class, who had long lived in country retirement, coming up +to Edinburgh, was, after an absence of many years, going along Princes +Street about the time when the water-carts were introduced for +preventing the dust, and seeing one of them passing, rushed from off the +pavement to the driver, saying, "Man, ye're _skailin'_ a' the water." +Such being her ignorance of modern improvements. + +There used to be a point and originality in expressions made use of in +regard to common matters, unlike what one finds now; for example: A +country minister had been invited, with his wife, to dine and spend the +night at the house of one of his lairds. Their host was very proud of +one of the very large beds which had just come into fashion, and in the +morning asked the lady how she had slept in it. "Oh, vary well, sir; +but, indeed, I thought I'd lost the minister athegither." + +Nothing, however, in my opinion, comes up to the originality and point +of the Montrose old maiden lady's most "exquisite reason" for not +subscribing to the proposed fund for organising a volunteer corps in +that town. It was at the time of expected invasion at the beginning of +the century, and some of the town magistrates called upon her and +solicited her subscription to raise men for the service of the +king--"Indeed," she answered right sturdily, "I'll dae nae sic thing; I +ne'er could raise a man _for mysell_, and I'm no ga'in to raise men for +King George." + +Some curious stories are told of ladies of this class, as connected with +the novelties and excitement of railway travelling. Missing their +luggage, or finding that something has gone wrong about it, often causes +very terrible distress, and might be amusing, were it not to the +sufferer so severe a calamity. I was much entertained with the +earnestness of this feeling, and the expression of it from an old Scotch +lady whose box was not forthcoming at the station where she was to +stop. When urged to be patient, her indignant exclamation was--"I can +bear ony pairtings that may be ca'ed for in God's providence; but I +_canna stan' pairtin' frae my claes_." + +The following anecdote from the west exhibits a curious confusion of +ideas arising from the old-fashioned prejudice against Frenchmen and +their language, which existed in the last generation. During the long +French war, two old ladies in Stranraer were going to the kirk; the one +said to the other, "Was it no a wonderfu' thing that the Breetish were +aye victorious ower the French in battle?" "Not a bit," said the other +old lady; "dinna ye ken the Breetish aye say their prayers before ga'in +into battle?" The other replied, "But canna the French say their prayers +as weel?" The reply was most characteristic, "Hoot! jabbering bodies, +wha could _understan'_ them?" + +Some of these ladies, as belonging to the old county families, had very +high notions of their own importance, and a great idea of their +difference from the burgher families of the town. I am assured of the +truth of the following naive specimen of such family pride:--One of the +olden maiden ladies of Montrose called one day on some ladies of one of +the families in the neighbourhood, and on being questioned as to the +news of the town, said, "News! oh, Bailie----'s eldest son is to be +married." "And pray," was the reply, "and pray, Miss ----, an' fa' ever +heard o' a merchant i' the toon o' Montrose _ha'in_ an _eldest son_?" +The good lady thought that any privilege of primogeniture belonged only +to the family of _laird_. + +It is a dangerous experiment to try passing off ungrounded claims upon +characters of this description. Many a clever sarcastic reply is on +record from Scottish ladies, directed against those who wished to +impose upon them some false sentiment. I often think of the remark of +the outspoken ancient lady, who, when told by her pastor, of whose +disinterestedness in his charge she was not quite sure, that he "had a +call from his Lord and Master to go," replied--"'Deed, sir, the Lord +micht hae ca'ed and ca'ed to ye lang eneuch to Ouchtertoul (a very small +stipend), and ye'd ne'er hae letten on that ye heard him." + +At the beginning of this century, when the fear of invasion was rife, it +was proposed to mount a small battery at the water-mouth by +subscription, and Miss Carnegy was waited on by a deputation from the +town-council. One of them having addressed her on the subject, she heard +him with some impatience, and when he had finished, she said, "Are ye +ane o' the toon-cooncil." He replied, "I have that honour, ma'am." To +which she rejoined, "Ye may hae that _profit_, but honour ye hae nane;" +and then to the point, she added, "But I've been tell't that ae day's +wark o' twa or three men wad mount the cannon, and that it may be a' +dune for twenty shillings; now there's twa punds to ye." The councillor +pocketed the money and withdrew. On one occasion, as she sat in an easy +chair, having assumed the habits and privileges of age, Mr. Mollison, +the minister of the Established Kirk, called on her to solicit for some +charity. She did not like being asked for money, and, from her Jacobite +principles, she certainly did not respect the Presbyterian Kirk. When he +came in she made an inclination of the head, and he said, "Don't get up, +madam." She replied, "Get up! I wadna rise out o' my chair for King +George himsell, let abee a whig minister." + +This was plain speaking enough, but there is something quite inimitable +in the matter-of-factness of the following story of an advertisement, +which may tend to illustrate the Antiquary's remark to Mrs. Macleuchar, +anent the starting of a coach or fly to Queensferry. A carrier, who +plied his trade between Aberdeen and a village considerably to the north +of it, was asked by one of the villagers, "Fan are ye gaen to the toon" +(Aberdeen). To which he replied, "I'll be in on Monanday, God willin' +and weather permitting an' on Tiseday, _fither or no_." + +It is a curious subject the various shades of Scottish dialect and +Scottish expressions, commonly called Scotticisms. We mark in the course +of fifty years how some disappear altogether; others become more and +more rare, and of all of them we may say, I think, that the specimens of +them are to be looked for every year more in the descending classes of +society. What was common amongst peers, judges, lairds, advocates, and +people of family and education, is now found in humbler ranks of life. +There are few persons perhaps who have been born in Scotland, and who +have lived long in Scotland, whom a nice southern ear might not detect +as from the north. But far beyond such nicer shades of distinction, +there are strong and characteristic marks of a Caledonian origin, with +which some of us have had practical acquaintance. I possess two curious, +and now, I believe, rather scarce, publications on the prevalent +Scotticisms of our speaking and writing. One is entitled "Scotticisms +designed to Correct Improprieties of Speech and Writing," by Dr. Beattie +of Aberdeen. The other is to the same purpose, and is entitled, +"Observations on the Scottish Dialect," by the late Right Honourable Sir +John Sinclair. Expressions which were common in their days, and used by +persons of all ranks, are not known by the rising generation. Many +amusing equivoques used to be current, arising from Scotch people in +England applying terms and expressions in a manner rather surprising to +southern ears. Thus, the story was told of a public character long +associated with the affairs of Scotland, Henry Dundas (first Viscount +Melville), applying to Mr. Pitt for the loan of a horse "_the length_ of +Highgate;" a very common expression in Scotland, at that time, to +signify the distance to which the ride was to extend. Mr. Pitt +good-humouredly wrote back to say that he was afraid he had not a horse +in his possession _quite so long_ as Mr. Dundas had mentioned, but he +had sent the longest he had. There is a well-known case of +mystification, caused to English ears by the use of Scottish terms, +which took place in the House of Peers during the examination of the +Magistrates of Edinburgh touching the particulars of the Porteous Mob in +1736. The Duke of Newcastle having asked the Provost with what kind of +shot the town-guard commanded by Porteous had loaded their muskets, +received the unexpected reply, "Ou, juist sic as ane shutes dukes and +sic like fules wi'." The answer was considered as a contempt of the +House of Lords, and the poor provost would have suffered from +misconception of his patois, had not the Duke of Argyle (who must have +been exceedingly amused) explained that the worthy magistrate's +expression, when rendered into English, did not apply to Peers and +Idiots but to _ducks_ and _water-fowl_. The circumstance is referred to +by Sir W. Scott in the notes to the Heart of Mid-Lothian. A similar +equivoque upon the double meaning of "Deuk" in Scottish language +supplied material for a poor woman's honest compliment to a benevolent +Scottish nobleman. John, Duke of Roxburghe, was one day out riding, and +at the gate of Floors he was accosted by an importunate old beggar +woman. He gave her half-a-crown, which pleased her so much that she +exclaimed, "Weel's me on your _guse_ face, for Duke's ower little +tae ca' ye." + +A very curious list may be made of words used in Scotland in a sense +which would be quite unintelligible to Southerns. Such applications are +going out, but I remember them well amongst the old-fashioned people of +Angus and the Mearns quite common in conversation. I subjoin some +specimens:-- + +_Bestial_ signifies amongst Scottish agriculturists cattle generally, +the whole aggregate number of beasts on the farm. Again, a Scottish +farmer, when he speaks of his "hogs" or of buying "hogs," has no +reference to swine, but means young sheep, i.e. sheep before they have +lost their first fleece. + +_Discreet_ does not express the idea of a prudent or cautious person so +much as of one who is not rude, but considerate of the opinions of +others. Such application of the word is said to have been made by Dr. +Chalmers to the late Henry, Bishop of Exeter. These two eminent +individuals had met for the first time at the hospitable house of the +late Mr. Murray, the publisher. On the introduction taking place, the +Bishop expressed himself so warmly as to the pleasure it gave him to +meet so distinguished and excellent a man as Dr. Chalmers, that the +Doctor, somewhat surprised at such an unexpected ebullition from an +English Church dignitary, could only reply, "Oh, I am sure your lordship +is very 'discreet[60].'" + +_Enterteening_ has in olden Scottish usage the sense not of amusing, but +interesting. I remember an honest Dandie Dinmont on a visit to Bath. A +lady, who had taken a kind charge of him, accompanied him to the +theatre, and in the most thrilling scene of Kemble's acting, what is +usually termed the dagger scene in Macbeth, she turned to the farmer +with a whisper, "Is not that fine?" to which the confidential reply was, +"Oh, mem, its verra _enterteening!_" Enterteening expressing his idea of +the effect produced. + +_Pig_, in old-fashioned Scotch, was always used for a coarse earthenware +jar or vessel. In the Life of the late Patrick Tytler, the amiable and +gifted historian of Scotland, there occurs an amusing exemplification of +the utter confusion of ideas caused by the use of Scottish phraseology. +The family, when they went to London, had taken with them an old +Scottish servant who had no notion of any terms beside her own. She came +in one day greatly disturbed at the extremely backward state of +knowledge of domestic affairs amongst the Londoners. She had been to so +many shops and could not get "a great broon pig to haud the butter in." + +From a relative of the family I have received an account of a still +worse confusion of ideas, caused by the inquiry of a Mrs. Chisholm of +Chisholm, who died in London in 1825, at an advanced age. She had come +from the country to be with her daughter, and was a genuine Scottish +lady of the old school. She wished to purchase a table-cloth of a cheque +pattern, like the squares of a chess or draught board. Now a +draught-board used to be called (as I remember) by old Scotch people a +"dam[61] brod[62]." Accordingly, Mrs. Chisholm entered the shop of a +linen-draper, and asked to be shown table-linen a _dam-brod pattern_. +The shopman, although, taken aback by a request, as he considered it, +so strongly worded, by a respectable old lady, brought down what he +assured her was the largest and widest made. No; that would not do. She +repeated her wish for a dam-brod pattern, and left the shop surprised at +the stupidity of the London shopman not having the pattern she +asked for. + +_Silly_ has in genuine old Scottish use reference to weakness of body +only, and not of mind. Before knowing the use of the word, I remember +being much astonished at a farmer of the Mearns telling me of the +strongest-minded man in the county that he was "uncommon silly," not +insinuating any decline of mental vigour, but only meaning that his +bodily strength was giving way. + +_Frail_, in like manner, expresses infirmity of body, and implies no +charge of any laxity in moral principle; yet I have seen English persons +looking with considerable consternation when an old-fashioned Scottish +lady, speaking of a young and graceful female, lamented her being +so _frail_. + +_Fail_ is another instance of different use of words. In Scotland it +used to be quite common to say of a person whose health and strength had +declined, that he had _failed_. To say this of a person connected with +mercantile business has a very serious effect upon southern ears, as +implying nothing short of bankruptcy and ruin. I recollect many years +ago at Monmouth, my dear mother creating much consternation in the mind +of the mayor, by saying of a worthy man, the principal banker in the +town, whom they both concurred in praising, that she was "sorry to find +he _was failing_." + +_Honest_ has in Scotch a peculiar application, irrespective of any +integrity of moral character. It is a kindly mode of referring to an +individual, as we would say to a stranger, "Honest man, would you tell +me the way to ----?" or as Lord Hermand, when about to sentence a woman +for stealing, began remonstratively, "Honest woman, whatever garr'd ye +steal your neighbour's tub?" + +_Superstitious_: A correspondent informs me that in some parts of +Mid-Lothian the people constantly use the word "superstitious" for +"bigoted;" thus, speaking of a very keen Free Church person, they will +say, "He is awfu' supperstitious." + +_Kail_ in England simply expresses cabbage, but in Scotland represents +the chief meal of the day. Hence the old-fashioned easy way of asking a +friend to dinner was to ask him if he would take his kail with the +family. In the same usage of the word, the Scottish proverb expresses +distress and trouble in a person's affairs, by saying that "he has got +his kail through the reek." In like manner haddock, in Kincardineshire +and Aberdeenshire, used to express the same idea, as the expression is, +"Will ye tak your haddock wi' us the day?" that fish being so plentiful +and so excellent that it was a standing dish. There is this difference, +however, in the local usage, that to say in Aberdeen, Will you take your +haddock? implies an invitation to dinner; whilst in Montrose the same +expression means an invitation to _supper_. Differences of pronunciation +also caused great confusion and misunderstanding. Novels used to be +pronounced no_vels_; envy en_vy_; a cloak was a clock, to the surprise +of an English lady, to whom the maid said, on her leaving the house, +"Mem, winna ye tak the _clock_ wi' ye?" + +The names of children's diseases were a remarkable item in the catalogue +of Scottish words:--Thus, in 1775, Mrs. Betty Muirheid kept a +boarding-school for young ladies in the Trongate of Glasgow, near the +Tron steeple. A girl on her arrival was asked whether she had had +smallpox. "Yes, mem, I've had the sma'pox, the nirls[63], the blabs[64], +the scaw[65], the kinkhost[66], and the fever, the branks[67] and the +worm[68]." + +There is indeed a case of Scottish pronunciation which adds to the force +and copiousness of our language, by discriminating four words, which, +according to English speaking, are undistinguishable in mere +pronunciation. The words are--wright (a carpenter), to write (with a +pen), right (the reverse of wrong), rite (a ceremony). The four are, +however, distinguished in old-fashioned Scotch pronunciation thus--1, +He's a wiricht; 2, to wireete; 3, richt; 4, rite. + +I can remember a peculiar Scottish phrase very commonly used, which now +seems to have passed away. I mean the expression "to let on," indicating +the notice or observation of something, or of some person.--For example, +"I saw Mr. ---- at the meeting, but I never let on that I knew he was +present." A form of expression which has been a great favourite in +Scotland in my recollection has much gone out of practice--I mean the +frequent use of diminutives, generally adopted either as terms of +endearment or of contempt. Thus it was very common to speak of a person +whom you meant rather to undervalue, as a _mannie_, a _boddie_, a _bit +boddie_, or a _wee bit mannie_. The Bailie in Rob Roy, when he intended +to represent his party as persons of no importance, used the expression, +"We are bits o' Glasgow bodies." + +An admirable Scotch expression I recollect from one of the Montrose +ladies before referred to. Her niece was asking a great many questions +on some point concerning which her aunt had been giving her +information, and coming over and over the ground, demanding an +explanation how this had happened, and why something else was so and so. +The old lady lost her patience, and at last burst forth: "I winna be +_back-speired_ noo, Pally Fullerton." Back-speired! how much more pithy +and expressive than cross-examined! "He's not a man to ride the water +on," expresses your want of confidence and of trust in the character +referred to. Another capital expression to mark that a person has stated +a point rather under than over the truth, is, "The less I lee," as in +Guy Mannering, where the precentor exclaims to Mrs. MacCandlish, "Aweel, +gudewife, then the less I lee." We have found it a very amusing task +collecting together a number of these phrases, and forming them into a +connected epistolary composition. We may imagine the sort of puzzle it +would be to a young person of the present day--one of what we may call +the new school. We will suppose an English young lady, or an English +educated young lady, lately married, receiving such a letter as the +following from the Scottish aunt of her husband. We may suppose it to be +written by a very old lady, who, for the last fifty years has not moved +from home, and has changed nothing of her early days. I can safely +affirm that every word of it I have either seen written in a letter, or +have heard in ordinary conversation:-- + + "_Montrose_, 1858[69]. + + "My Dear Niece--I am real glad to find my _nevy_ has made so + good a choice as to have secured you for his wife; and I am + sure this step will add much to his comfort, and we _behove_ + to rejoice at it. He will now look forward to his evening at + home, and you will be happy when you find you never _want_ + him. It will be a great pleasure when you hear him in the + _trance_, and wipe his feet upon the _bass_. But Willy is not + strong, and you must look well after him. I hope you do not + let him _snuff_ so much as he did. He had a sister, poor + thing, who died early. She was remarkably clever, and well + read, and most intelligent, but was always uncommonly + _silly_[70] In the autumn of '40 she had a _sair host_, and + was aye _speaking through a cold_, and at dinner never did + more than to _sup a few family broth_. I am afraid she did + not _change her feet_ when she came in from the wet one + evening. I never _let on_ that I observed anything to be + wrong; but I remember asking her to come and _sit upon_ the + fire. But she went out, and did not _take_ the door with her. + She lingered till next spring, when she had a great + _income_[71], and her parents were then too poor to take her + south, and she died. I hope you will like the lassie Eppie we + have sent you. She is a _discreet_ girl, and comes of a + decent family. She has a sister _married upon_ a Seceding + minister at Kirkcaldy. But I hear he expects to be + _transported_ soon. She was brought up in one of the + _hospitals_ here. Her father had been a _souter_ and a _pawky + chiel_ enough, but was _doited_ for many years, and her + mother was _sair dottled_. We have been greatly interested in + the hospital where Eppie was _educate_, and intended getting + up a bazaar for it, and would have asked you to help us, as + we were most anxious to raise some additional funds, when one + of the Bailies died and left it _feuing-stances_ to the + amount of 5000 pounds, which was really a great + _mortification_. I am not a good _hand of write_, and + therefore shall stop. I am very tired, and have been + _gantin_[72] for this half-hour, and even in correspondence + gantin' may be _smittin'_[73]. The _kitchen_[74] is just + coming in, and I _feel_ a _smell of tea_, so when I get my + _four hours,_ that will refresh me and set me up again.--I + am, your affectionate aunt, ISABEL DINGWALL." + +This letter, then, we suppose written by a very old Forfarshire lady to +her niece in England, and perhaps the young lady who received it might +answer it in a style as strange to her aunt as her aunt's is to her, +especially if she belonged to that lively class of our young female +friends who indulge a little in phraseology which they have imbibed from +their brothers, or male cousins, who have, perhaps for their amusement, +encouraged them in its use. The answer, then, might be something like +this; and without meaning to be severe or satirical upon our young lady +friends, I may truly say that, though I never heard from one young lady +_all_ these fast terms, I have heard the most of them separately +from many:-- + + "My Dear Aunty--Many thanks for your kind letter and its + enclosure. From my not knowing Scotch, I am not quite up to + the mark, and some of the expressions I don't _twig_ at all. + Willie is absent for a few days, but when he returns home he + will explain it; he is quite _awake_ on all such things. I am + glad you are pleased that Willie and I are now _spliced_. I + am well aware that you will hear me spoken of in some + quarters as a _fast_ young lady. A man here had the impudence + to say that when he visited my husband's friends he would + tell them so. I quietly and civilly replied, 'You be blowed!' + So don't believe him. We get on famously at present. Willie + comes home from the office every afternoon at five. We + generally take a walk before dinner, and read and work if we + don't go out; and I assure you we are very _jolly_. We don't + know many people here yet. It is rather a _swell_ + neighbourhood; and if we can't get in with the _nobs_, depend + upon it we will never take up with any society that is + decidedly _snobby. I_ daresay the girl you are sending will + be very useful to us; our present one is an awful _slow + coach_. In fact, the sending her to us was a regular _do_. + But we hope some day to sport _buttons_. My father and mother + paid us a visit last week. The _governor_ is well, and, + notwithstanding years and infirmities, comes out quite a + _jolly old cove_. He is, indeed, if you will pardon the + partiality of a daughter, a regular _brick_. He says he will + help us if we can't get on, and I make no doubt will in due + time _fork out the tin_. I am busy working a cap for you, + dear aunty; it is from a pretty German pattern, and I think + when finished will be quite a _stunner_. There is a shop in + Regent Street where I hire patterns, and can get six of them + for five _bob_. I then return them without buying them, which + I think a capital _dodge_. I hope you will sport it for my + sake at your first _tea and turn out_. + + "I have nothing more to say particular, but am always + + "Your affectionate niece, + + "ELIZA DINGWALL." + + "_P.S._--I am trying to break Willie off his horrid habit of + taking snuff. I had rather see him take his cigar when we are + walking. You will be told, I daresay, that I sometimes take a + _weed_ myself. It is not true, dear aunty." + +Before leaving the question of change in Scottish expressions, it may +be proper to add a few words on the subject of Scottish +_dialects_--_i.e._, on the differences which exist in different counties +or localities in the Scottish tongue itself. These differences used to +be as marked as different languages; of course they still exist amongst +the peasantry as before. The change consists in their gradual vanishing +from the conversation of the educated and refined. The dialects with +which I am most conversant are the two which present the greatest +contrast, viz. the Angus and the Aberdeen, or the slow and broad +Scotch--the quick and sharp Scotch. Whilst the one talks of "Buuts and +shoon," the other calls the same articles "beets and sheen." With the +Aberdonian "what" is always "fat" or "fatten;" "music" is "meesic;" +"brutes" are "breets;" "What are ye duin'?" of southern Scotch, in +Aberdeen would be "Fat are ye deein'?" Fergusson, nearly a century ago, +noted this peculiarity of dialect in his poem of The Leith Races:-- + + "The Buchan bodies through the beach, + Their bunch of Findrams cry; + And skirl out bauld in Norland speech, + Gude speldans _fa_ will buy?" + +"Findon," or "Finnan haddies," are split, smoked, and partially dried +haddocks. Fergusson, in using the word "_Findrams"_, which is not found +in our glossaries, has been thought to be in error, but his accuracy has +been verified singularly enough, within the last few days, by a worthy +octogenarian Newhaven fisherman, bearing the characteristic name of +Flucker, who remarked "that it was a word commonly used in his youth; +and, above all," he added, "when Leith Races were held on the sands, he +was like to be deeved wi' the lang-tongued hizzies skirling out, '_Aell +a Findram Speldrains_,' and they jist ca'ed it that to get a better grip +o't wi' their tongues." + +In Galloway, in 1684, Symson, afterwards an ousted Episcopalian minister +(of Kirkinner), notes some peculiarities in the speech of the people in +that district. "Some of the countrey people, especially those of the +elder sort, do very often omit the letter 'h' after 't' as ting for +thing; tree for three; tatch for thatch; wit for with; fait for faith; +mout for mouth, etc.; and also, contrary to some north countrey people, +they oftentimes pronounce 'w' for 'v,' as serwant for servant; and so +they call the months of February, March, and April, the _ware_ quarter, +from _ver_[75]. Hence their common proverb, speaking of the storms in +February, '_winter never comes till ware comes_.'" These peculiarities +of language have almost disappeared--the immense influx of Irish +emigrants during late years has exercised a perceptible influence over +the dialect of Wigtonshire. + +When a southerner mentioned the death of a friend to a lady of the +granite city, she asked, "Fat dee'd he o'?" which being utterly +incomprehensible to the person asked, another Aberdonian lady kindly +explained the question, and put it into language which she supposed +_could_ not be mistaken, as thus, "Fat did he dee o'?" If there was this +difference between the Aberdeen and the Forfar dialect, how much greater +must be that difference when contrasted with the _ore rotundo_ language +of an English southern dignitary. Such a one being present at a school +examination in Aberdeen wished to put some questions on Scripture +history himself, and asked an intelligent boy, "What was the ultimate +fate of Pharaoh?" This the boy not understanding, the master put the +same question Aberdonice, "Jemmy, fat was the hinner end o' Pharaoh?" +which called forth the ready reply, "He was drouned i' the Red Sea." A +Forfarshire parent, dissatisfied with his son's English pronunciation, +remonstrated with him, "What for div' ye say _why_? why canna ye say +'what for'?" + +The power of Scottish phraseology, or rather of Scottish _language_, +could not be better displayed than in the following Aberdonian +description of London theatricals:--Mr. Taylor, at one time well known +in London as having the management of the opera-house, had his father up +from Aberdeen to visit him and see the wonders of the capital. When the +old man returned home, his friends, anxious to know the impressions +produced on his mind by scenes and characters so different from what he +had been accustomed to at home, inquired what sort of business his son +carried on? "Ou," said he (in reference to the operatic singers and the +corps de ballet), "he just keeps a curn[76] o' quainies[77] and a wheen +widdyfous[78], and gars them fissle[79], and loup, and mak murgeons[80], +to please the great fowk." + +Another ludicrous interrogatory occurred regarding the death of a Mr. +Thomas Thomson. It appeared there were two cousins of this name, both +corpulent men. When it was announced that Mr. Thomas Thomson was dead, +an Aberdeen friend of the family asked, "Fatten Thamas Thamson?" He was +informed that it was a fat Thamas Thamson, upon which the Aberdeen query +naturally arose, "Ay, but fatten fat Thamas Thamson?" Another +illustration of the Aberdeen dialect is thus given:--"The Pope o' Rome +requires a bull to do his wark, but the Emperor o' France made a coo +dee't a'"--a cow do it all--a pun on _coup d'etat_. A young lady from +Aberdeen had been on a visit to Montrose, and was disappointed at +finding there a great lack of beaux, and balls, and concerts. This lack +was not made up to her by the invitations which she had received to +dinner parties. And she thus expressed her feelings on the subject in +her native dialect, when asked how she liked Montrose: "Indeed there's +neither men nor meesic, and fat care I for meat?" There is no male +society and no concerts, and what do I care for dinners? The dialect and +the local feelings of Aberdeen were said to have produced some amusement +in London, as displayed by the lady of the Provost of Aberdeen when +accompanying her husband going up officially to the capital. Some +persons to whom she had been introduced recommended her going to the +opera as one of the sights worthy the attention of a stranger. The good +lady, full of the greatness of her situation as wife of the provost, and +knowing the sensation her appearance in public occasioned when in her +own city, and supposing that a little excitement would accompany her +with the London public, rather declined, under the modest plea, "Fat for +should I gang to the opera, just to creat a confeesion?" An aunt of +mine, who knew Aberdeen well, used to tell a traditionary story of two +Aberdonian ladies, who by their insinuations against each other, finely +illustrated the force of the dialect then in common use. They had both +of them been very attentive to a sick lady in declining health, and on +her death each had felt a distrust of the perfect disinterestedness of +the other's attention. This created more than a coolness between them, +and the bad feeling came out on their passing in the street. The one +insinuated her suspicions of unfair dealing with the property of the +deceased by ejaculating, as the other passed her, "Henny pig[81] and +green tea," to which the other retorted, in the same spirit, "Silk coat +and negligee[82]." Aberdonian pronunciation produced on one occasion a +curious equivoque between the minister and a mother of a family with +whom he was conversing in a pastoral way. The minister had said, "Weel, +Margaret, I hope you're thoroughly ashamed of your _sins_" Now, in +Aberdeenshire _sons_ are pronounced sins; accordingly, to the minister's +surprise, Margaret burst forth, "Ashamed o' ma sins! na, na, I'm proud +o' ma sins. Indeed, gin it werena for thae cutties o' dauchters, I +should be _ower_ proud o' ma sins." + +Any of my readers who are not much conversant with Aberdeen dialect will +find the following a good specimen:--A lady who resided in Aberdeen, +being on a visit to some friends in the country, joined an excursion on +horseback. Not being much of an equestrian, she was mounted upon a +Highland pony as being the _canniest baste_. He, however, had a trick of +standing still in crossing a stream. A burn had to be crossed--the rest +of the party passed on, while "Paddy" remained, pretending to drink. +Miss More, in great desperation, called out to one of her +friends--"Bell, 'oman, turn back an gie me your bit fuppie, for the +breet's stannin' i' the peel wi' ma." + +A rich specimen of Aberdeen dialect, under peculiar circumstances, was +supplied by an Aberdonian lady who had risen in the world from selling +fruit at a stall to be the wife of the Lord Provost. Driving along in +her own carriage, she ordered it to stop, and called to her a poor +woman whom she saw following her old occupation. After some colloquy, +she dismissed her very coolly, remarking, "'Deed, freet's dear sin' I +sauld freet in streets o' Aberdeen." This anecdote of reference to a +good lady's more humble occupation than riding in her carriage may +introduce a somewhat analogous anecdote, in which a more distinguished +personage than the wife of the Provost of Aberdeen takes a prominent +part. The present Archbishop of Canterbury tells the story himself, with +that admixture of humour and of true dignity by which his Grace's manner +is so happily distinguished. The Archbishop's father in early life lived +much at Dollar, where, I believe, he had some legal and official +appointment. His sons, the Archbishop and his brother, attended the +grammar school, rather celebrated in the country; they ran about and +played like other lads, and were known as schoolboys to the peasantry. +In after days, when the Archbishop had arrived at his present place of +dignity as Primate of all England, he was attending a great confirmation +service at Croydon--the churchwardens, clergy, mayors, etc., of the +place in attendance upon the Archbishop, and a great congregation of +spectators. On going up the centre of the church, a Dollar man, who had +got into the crowd in a side aisle, said, loud enough for the Archbishop +to hear, "There wasna muckle o' this at Dollar, my Lord." + +I have not had leisure to pursue, as I had intended, a further +consideration of SCOTTISH DIALECT, and their differences from each other +in the north, south, east, and west of Scotland. I merely remark now, +that the dialect of one district is considered quite barbarous, and +laughed at by the inhabitants of another district where a different form +of language is adopted. I have spoken of the essential difference +between Aberdeen and Southern Scotch. An English gentleman had been +visiting the Lord Provost of Edinburgh, and accompanied him to Aberdeen. +His lordship of Edinburgh introduced his English friend to the Provost +of Aberdeen, and they both attended a great dinner given by the latter. +After grace had been said, the Provost kindly and hospitably addressed +the company, Aberdonice--"Now, gentlemen, fah tee, fah tee." The +Englishman whispered to his friend, and asked what was meant by "fah +tee, fah tee;" to which his lordship replied--"Hout, he canna speak; he +means fau too, fau too." Thus one Scotticism was held in terror by those +who used a different Scotticism: as at Inverary, the wife of the chief +writer of the place, seeking to secure her guest from the taint of +inferior society, intimated to him, but somewhat confidentially, that +Mrs. W. (the rival writer's wife) was quite a vulgar body, so much so as +to ask any one leaving the room to "_snib_ the door," instead of bidding +them, as she triumphantly observed, "_sneck_ the door." + +Now, to every one who follows these anecdotes of a past time, it must be +obvious how much peculiarities of Scottish wit and humour depend upon +the language in which they are clothed. As I have before remarked, much +of the point depends upon the _broad Scotch_ with which they are +accompanied. As a type and representative of that phraseology, we would +specially recommend a study of our Scottish proverbs. In fact, in +Scottish proverbs will be found an epitome of the Scottish phraseology, +which is peculiar and characteristic. I think it quite clear that there +are proverbs exclusively Scottish, and as we find embodied in them +traits of Scottish character, and many peculiar forms of Scottish +thought and Scottish language, sayings of this kind, once so familiar, +should have a place in our Scottish Reminiscences. Proverbs are +literally, in many instances, becoming _reminiscences_. They now seem to +belong to that older generation whom we recollect, and who used them in +conversation freely and constantly. To strengthen an argument or +illustrate a remark by a proverb was then a common practice in +conversation. Their use, however, is now considered vulgar, and their +formal application is almost prohibited by the rules of polite society. +Lord Chesterfield denounced the practice of quoting proverbs as a +palpable violation of all polite refinement in conversation. +Notwithstanding all this, we acknowledge having much pleasure in +recalling our national proverbial expressions. They are full of +character, and we find amongst them important truths, expressed +forcibly, wisely, and gracefully. The expression of Bacon has often been +quoted--"The genius, wit, and wisdom of a nation, are discovered by +their proverbs." + +All nations have their proverbs, and a vast number of books have been +written on the subject. We find, accordingly, that collections have been +made of proverbs considered as belonging peculiarly to Scotland. The +collections to which I have had access are the following:-- + +1. The fifth edition, by Balfour, of "Ray's Complete Collection of +English Proverbs," in which is a separate collection of those which are +considered Scottish Proverbs--1813. Ray professes to have taken these +from Fergusson's work mentioned below. + +2. A Complete Collection of Scottish Proverbs, explained and made +intelligible to the English reader, by James Kelly, M.A., published in +London 1721. + +3. Scottish Proverbs gathered together by David Fergusson, sometime +minister at Dunfermline, and put _ordine alphabetico_ when he departed +this life anno 1598. Edinburgh, 1641. + +4. A collection of Scots Proverbs, dedicated to the Tenantry of +Scotland, by Allan Ramsay. This collection is found in the edition of +his Poetical Works, 3 vols. post 8vo, Edin. 1818, but is not in the +handsome edition of 1800. London, 2 vols. 8vo. + +5. Scottish Proverbs, collected and arranged by Andrew Henderson, with +an introductory Essay by W. Motherwell. Edin. 1832. + +6. The Proverbial Philosophy of Scotland, an address to the School of +Arts, by William Stirling of Keir, M.P. Stirling and Edin. 1855. + +The collection of Ray, the great English naturalist, is well known. The +first two editions, published at Cambridge in 1670 and 1678, were by the +author; subsequent editions were by other editors. + +The work by James Kelly professes to collect Scottish proverbs only. It +is a volume of nearly 400 pages, and contains a short explanation or +commentary attached to each, and often parallel sayings from other +languages[83]. Mr. Kelly bears ample testimony to the extraordinary free +use made of proverbs in his time by his countrymen and by himself. He +says that "there were current in society upwards of 3000 proverbs, +exclusively Scottish." He adds, "The Scots are wonderfully given to this +way of speaking, and, as the consequence of that, abound with proverbs, +many of which are very expressive, quick, and home to the purpose; and, +indeed, this humour prevails universally over the whole nation, +especially among the better sort of the commonalty, none of whom will +discourse with you any considerable time but he will affirm every +assertion and observation with a Scottish proverb. To that nation I owe +my birth and education; and to that manner of speaking I was used from +my infancy, to such a degree that I became in some measure remarkable +for it." This was written in 1721, and we may see from Mr. Kelly's +account what a change has taken place in society as regards this mode of +intercourse. Our author states that he has "omitted in his collection +many popular proverbs which are very pat and expressive," and adds as +his reason, that "since it does not become a man of manners to use them, +it does not become a man of my age and profession to write them." What +was Mr. Kelly's profession or what his age does not appear from any +statements in this volume; but, judging by many proverbs which he has +_retained_, those which consideration of years and of profession induced +him to omit must have been bad indeed, and unbecoming for _any_ age or +_any_ profession[84]. The third collection by Mr. Fergusson is mentioned +by Kelly as the only one which had been made before his time, and that +he had not met with it till he had made considerable progress in his own +collection. The book is now extremely rare, and fetches a high price. By +the great kindness of the learned librarian, I have been permitted to +see the copy belonging to the library of the Writers to the Signet. It +is the first edition, and very rare. A quaint little thin volume, such +as delights the eyes of true bibliomaniacs, unpaged, and published at +Edinburgh 1641--although on the title-page the proverbs are said to have +been collected at Mr. Fergusson's death, 1598[85]. There is no preface +or notice by the author, but an address from the printer, "to the +merrie, judicious, and discreet reader." + +The proverbs, amounting to 945, are given without any comment or +explanation. Many of them are of a very antique cast of language; indeed +some would be to most persons quite unintelligible without a lexicon. + +The printer, in his address "to the merrie, judicious, and discreet +reader," refers in the following quaint expressions to the +author:--"Therefore manie in this realme that hath hard of David +Fergusson, sometime minister at Dunfermline, and of his quick answers +and speeches, both to great persons and others inferiours, and hath hard +of his proverbs which hee gathered together in his time, and now we put +downe according to the order of the alphabet; and manie, of all ranks of +persons, being verie desirous to have the said proverbs, I have thought +good to put them to the presse for thy better satisfaction.... I know +that there may be some that will say and marvell that a minister should +have taken pains to gather such proverbs together; but they that knew +his forme of powerfull preaching the word, and his ordinar talking, ever +almost using proverbiall speeches, will not finde fault with this that +he hath done. And whereas there are some old Scottish words not in use +now, bear with that, because if ye alter those words, the proverb will +have no grace; and so, recommending these proverbs to thy good use, I +bid thee farewell." + +I now subjoin a few of Fergusson's Proverbs, verbatim, which are of a +more obsolete character, and have appended explanations, of the +correctness of which, however, I am not quite confident:-- + +_A year a nurish[86], seven year a da[87]_. Refers, I presume, to +fulfilling the maternal office. + +_Anes payit never cravit_. Debts once paid give no more trouble. + +_All wald[88] have all, all wald forgie[89]_. Those who exact much +should be ready to concede. + +_A gangang[90] fit[91] is aye[92] gettin (gin[93] it were but a thorn),_ +or, as it sometimes runs, _gin it were but a broken tae, i.e. toe_. A +man of industry will certainly get a living; though the proverb is often +applied to those who went abroad and got a mischief when they might +safely have stayed at home--(Kelly). + +_All crakes[94], all bears[95]_. Spoken against bullies who kept a great +hectoring, and yet, when put to it, tamely pocket an affront--(Kelly). + +_Bourd[96] not wi' bawtie[97] (lest he bite you_). Do not jest too +familiarly with your superiors (Kelly), or with dangerous characters. + +_Bread's house skailed never[98]_ While people have bread they need not +give up housekeeping. Spoken when one has bread and wishes something +better--(Kelly). + +_Crabbit[99] was and cause had_. Spoken ironically of persons put out of +temper without adequate cause. + +_Dame, deem[100] warily, (ye watna[101] wha wytes[102] +yersell_).--Spoken to remind those who pass hard censures on others +that they may themselves be censured. + +_Efter lang mint[103] never dint[104]_. Spoken of long and painful +labour producing little effect. Kelly's reading is "_Lang mint little +dint_." Spoken when men threaten much and dare not execute--(Kelly). + +_Fill fou[105] and hand[106] fou maks a stark[107] man_. In Border +language a _stark_ man was one who takes and keeps boldly. + +_He that crabbs[108] without cause should mease[109] without +mends[110]_. Spoken to remind those who are angry without cause, that +they should not be particular in requiring apologies from others. + +_He is worth na weill that may not bide na wae_. He deserves not the +sweet that will not taste the sour. He does not deserve prosperity who +cannot meet adversity. + +_Kame[111] sindle[112] kame sair_[113]. Applied to those who forbear for +a while, but when once roused can act with severity. + +_Kamesters[114] are aye creeshie[115]_. It is usual for men to look like +their trade. + +_Let alane maks mony lurden_[116]. Want of correction makes many a bad +boy--(Kelly). + +_Mony tynes[117] the half-mark[118] whinger[119] (for the halfe pennie +whang_)[120]. Another version of penny wise and pound foolish. + +_Na plie[121] is best_. + +_Reavers[122] should not be rewers_[123]. Those who are so fond of a +thing as to snap at it, should not repent when they have got +it--(Kelly). + +_Sok and seill is best_. The interpretation of this proverb is not +obvious, and later writers do not appear to have adopted it from +Fergusson. It is quite clear that sok or sock is the ploughshare. Seil +is happiness, as in Kelly. "Seil comes not till sorrow be o'er;" and in +Aberdeen they say, "Seil o' your face," to express a blessing. My +reading is "the plough and happiness the best lot." The happiest life is +the healthy country one. See Robert Burns' spirited song with +the chorus: + + "Up wi' my ploughman lad, + And hey my merry ploughman; + Of a' the trades that I do ken, + Commend me to the ploughman." + +A somewhat different reading of this very obscure and now indeed +obsolete proverb has been suggested by an esteemed and learned +friend:--"I should say rather it meant that the ploughshare, or country +life, accompanied with good luck or fortune was best; _i.e.,_ that +industry coupled with good fortune (good seasons and the like) was the +combination that was most to be desired. _Soel_, in Anglo-Saxon, as a +noun, means _opportunity_, and then good luck, happiness, etc." + +_There's mae[124] madines[125] nor makines_[126]. Girls are more +plentiful in the world than hares. + +_Ye bried[127] of the gouk[128], ye have not a rhyme[129] but ane_. +Applied to persons who tire everybody by constantly harping on +one subject. + +The collection by Allan Ramsay is very good, and professes to correct +the errors of former collectors. I have now before me the _first +edition_, Edinburgh, 1737, with the appropriate motto on the title-page, +"That maun be true that a' men say." This edition contains proverbs +only, the number being 2464. Some proverbs in this collection I do not +find in others, and one quality it possesses in a remarkable degree--it +is very Scotch. The language of the proverbial wisdom has the true +Scottish flavour; not only is this the case with the proverbs +themselves, but the dedication to the tenantry of Scotland, prefixed to +the collection, is written in pure Scottish dialect. From this +dedication I make an extract, which falls in with our plan of recording +Scotch reminiscences, as Allan Ramsay there states the great value set +upon proverbs in his day, and the great importance which he attaches to +them as teachers of moral wisdom, and as combining amusement with +instruction. The prose of Allan Ramsay has, too, a spice of his poetry +in its composition. His dedication is, To the tenantry of Scotland, +farmers of the dales, and storemasters of the hills-- + +"Worthy friends--The following hoard of wise sayings and observations of +our forefathers, which have been gathering through mony bygane ages, I +have collected with great care, and restored to their proper sense.... + +"As naething helps our happiness mair than to have the mind made up wi' +right principles, I desire you, for the thriving and pleasure of you and +yours, to use your een and lend your lugs to these guid _auld saws_, +that shine wi' wail'd sense, and will as lang as the world wags. Gar +your bairns get them by heart; let them have a place among your +family-books, and may never a window-sole through the country be without +them. On a spare hour, when the day is clear, behind a ruck, or on the +green howm, draw the treasure frae your pouch, an' enjoy the pleasant +companion. Ye happy herds, while your hirdsell are feeding on the +flowery braes, you may eithly make yoursells master of the haleware. How +usefou' will it prove to you (wha hae sae few opportunities of common +clattering) when ye forgather wi' your friends at kirk or market, +banquet or bridal! By your proficiency you'll be able, in the proverbial +way, to keep up the saul of a conversation that is baith blyth +an usefou'." + +Mr. Henderson's work is a compilation from those already mentioned. It +is very copious, and the introductory essay contains some excellent +remarks upon the wisdom and wit of Scottish proverbial sayings. + +Mr. Stirling's (now Sir W. Stirling-Maxwell's) address, like everything +he writes, indicates a minute and profound knowledge of his subject, and +is full of picturesque and just views of human nature. He attaches much +importance to the teaching conveyed in proverbial expressions, and +recommends his readers even still to collect such proverbial expressions +as may yet linger in conversation, because, as he observes, "If it is +not yet registered, it is possible that it might have died with the +tongue from which you took it, and so have been lost for ever." "I +believe," he adds, "the number of good old saws still floating as waifs +and strays on the tide of popular talk to be much greater than might at +first appear." + +One remark is applicable to all these collections--viz., that out of so +large a number there are many of them on which we have little grounds +for deciding that they are _exclusively_ Scottish. In fact, some are +mere translations of proverbs adopted by many nations; some of universal +adoption. Thus we have-- + + _A burnt bairn fire dreads. + Ae swallow makes nae simmer. + Faint heart ne'er wan fair lady. + Ill weeds wax weel. + Mony sma's mak a muckle. + O' twa ills chuse the least. + Set a knave to grip a knave. + Twa wits are better than ane. + There's nae fule like an auld fule. + Ye canna mak a silk purse o' a sow's lug. + Ae bird i' the hand is worth twa fleeing. + Mony cooks ne'er made gude kail_. + +Of numerous proverbs such as these, some may or may not be original in +the Scottish. Sir William remarks that many of the best and oldest +proverbs may be common to all people--may have occurred to all. In our +national collections, therefore, some of the proverbs recorded may be +simply translations into Scotch of what have been long considered the +property of other nations. Still, I hope it is not a mere national +partiality to say that many of the common proverbs _gain_ much by such +translation from other tongues. All that I would attempt now is, to +select some of our more popular proverbial sayings, which many of us can +remember as current amongst us, and were much used by the late +generation in society, and to add a few from the collections I have +named, which bear a very decided Scottish stamp either in turn of +thought or in turn of language. + +I remember being much struck the first time I heard the application of +that pretty Scottish saying regarding a fair bride. I was walking in +Montrose, a day or two before her marriage, with a young lady, a +connection of mine, who merited this description, when she was kindly +accosted by an old friend, an honest fish-wife of the town, "Weel, Miss +Elizabeth, hae ye gotten a' yer claes ready?" to which the young lady +modestly answered, "Oh, Janet, my claes are soon got ready;" and Janet +replied, in the old Scotch proverb, "Ay, weel, _a bonnie bride's sune +buskit_[130]." In the old collection, an addition less sentimental is +made to this proverb, _A short horse is sune wispit_[131]. + +To encourage strenuous exertions to meet difficult circumstances, is +well expressed by _Setting a stout heart to a stey brae_. + +The mode of expressing that the worth of a handsome woman outweighs even +her beauty, has a very Scottish character--_She's better than she's +bonnie_. The opposite of this was expressed by a Highlander of his own +wife, when he somewhat ungrammatically said of her, "_She's bonnier than +she's better_." + +The frequent evil to harvest operations from autumnal rains and fogs in +Scotland is well told in the saying, _A dry summer ne'er made a +dear peck_. + +There can be no question as to country in the following, which seems to +express generally that persons may have the name and appearance of +greatness without the reality--_A' Stuarts are na sib[132] to the king_. + +There is an excellent Scottish version of the common proverb, "He that's +born to be hanged will never be drowned."--_The water will never +warr[133], the widdie, i.e._ never cheat the gallows. This saying +received a very naive practical application during the anxiety and +alarm of a storm. One of the passengers, a good simple-minded minister, +was sharing the alarm that was felt around him, until spying one of his +parishioners, of whose ignominious end he had long felt persuaded, he +exclaimed to himself, "Oh, we are all safe now," and accordingly +accosted the poor man with strong assurances of the great pleasure he +had in seeing him on board. + +_It's ill getting the breeks aff the Highlandman_ is a proverb that +savours very strong of a Lowland Scotch origin. Having suffered loss at +the hands of their neighbours from the hills, this was a mode of +expressing the painful truth that there was little hope of obtaining +redress from those who had no _means_ at their disposal. + +Proverbs connected with the bagpipes I set down as legitimate Scotch, as +thus--_Ye are as lang in tuning your pipes as anither wad play a +spring_[134]. You are as long of setting about a thing as another would +be in doing it. + +There is a set of Scottish proverbs which we may group together as +containing one quality in common, and that in reference to the Evil +Spirit, and to his agency in the world. This is a reference often, I +fear, too lightly made; but I am not conscious of anything deliberately +profane or irreverent in the following:-- + +_The deil's nae sae ill as he's caa'd_. The most of people may be found +to have some redeeming good point: applied in _Guy Mannering_ by the +Deacon to Gilbert Glossin, upon his intimating his intention to come to +his shop soon for the purpose of laying in his winter stock of +groceries. + +To the same effect, _It's a sin to lee on the deil_. Even of the worst +people, _truth_ at least should be spoken. + +_He should hae a lang-shafted spune that sups kail wi' the deil._ He +should be well guarded and well protected that has to do with cunning +and unprincipled men. + +_Lang ere the deil dee by the dyke-side._ Spoken when the improbable +death of some powerful and ill-disposed person is talked of. + +_Let ae deil ding anither_. Spoken when too bad persons are at variance +over some evil work. + +_The deil's bairns hae deil's luck_. Spoken enviously when ill people +prosper. + +_The deil's a busy bishop in his ain diocie_. Bad men are sure to be +active in promoting their own bad ends. A quaint proverb of this class I +have been told of as coming from the reminiscences of an old lady of +quality, to recommend a courteous manner to every one: _It's aye gude to +be ceevil, as the auld wife said when she beckit[135] to the deevil_. + +_Raise nae mair deils than ye are able to lay_. Provoke no strifes which +ye may be unable to appease. + +_The deil's aye gude to his ain_. A malicious proverb, spoken as if +those whom we disparage were deriving their success from bad causes. + +_Ye wad do little for God an the deevil was dead_. A sarcastic mode of +telling a person that fear, rather than love or principle, is the motive +to his good conduct. + +In the old collection already referred to is a proverb which, although +somewhat _personal_, is too good to omit. It is doubtful how it took its +origin, whether as a satire against the decanal order in general, or +against some obnoxious dean in particular. These are the terms of it: +_The deil an' the dean begin wi' ae letter. When the deil has the dean +the kirk will be the better._ + +_The deil's gane ower Jock Wabster_ is a saying which I have been +accustomed to in my part of the country from early years. It expresses +generally misfortune or confusion, but I am not quite sure of the +_exact_ meaning, or who is represented by "Jock Wabster." It was a great +favourite with Sir Walter Scott, who quotes it twice in _Rob Roy_. Allan +Ramsay introduces it in the _Gentle Shepherd_ to express the misery of +married life when the first dream of love has passed away:-- + + "The 'Deil gaes ower Jock Wabster,' hame grows hell, + When Pate misca's ye waur than tongue can tell." + +There are two very pithy Scottish proverbial expressions for describing +the case of young women losing their chance of good marriages by setting +their aims too high. Thus an old lady, speaking of her granddaughter +having made what she considered a poor match, described her as having +"_lookit at the moon, and lichtit[136] in the midden_." + +It is recorded again of a celebrated beauty, Becky Monteith, that being +asked how she had not made a good marriage, she replied, "_Ye see, I +wadna hae the walkers, and the riders gaed by._" + +_It's ill to wauken sleeping dogs._ It is a bad policy to rouse +dangerous and mischievous people, who are for the present quiet. + +_It is nae mair ferly[137] to see a woman greit than to see a goose go +barefit._ A harsh and ungallant reference to the facility with which the +softer sex can avail themselves of tears to carry a point. + +_A Scots mist will weet an Englishman to the skin._ A proverb, +evidently of Caledonian origin, arising from the frequent complaints +made by English visitors of the heavy mists which hang about our hills, +and which are found to annoy the southern traveller as it were +downright rain. + +_Keep your ain fish-guts to your ain sea-maws._ This was a favourite +proverb with Sir Walter Scott, when he meant to express the policy of +first considering the interests that are nearest home. The saying +savours of the fishing population of the east cost. + +_A Yule feast may be done at Pasch_. Festivities, although usually +practised at Christmas, need not, on suitable occasions, be confined to +any season. + +_It's better to sup wi' a cutty than want a spune._ Cutty means anything +short, stumpy, and not of full growth; frequently applied to a +short-handled horn spoon. As Meg Merrilies says to the bewildered +Dominie, "If ye dinna eat instantly, by the bread and salt, I'll put it +down your throat wi' the _cutty spune_." + +"_Fules mak feasts and wise men eat 'em,_ my Lord." This was said to a +Scottish nobleman on his giving a great entertainment, and who readily +answered, "Ay, and _Wise men make proverbs and fools repeat 'em._" + +_A green Yule[138] and a white Pays[139] mak a fat kirk-yard._ A very +coarse proverb, but may express a general truth as regards the effects +of season on the human frame. Another of a similar character is, _An +air[140] winter maks a sair[141] winter_. + +_Wha will bell the cat?_ The proverb is used in reference to a proposal +for accomplishing a difficult or dangerous task, and alludes to the +fable of the poor mice proposing to put a bell about the cat's neck, +that they might be apprised of his coming. The historical application is +well known. When the nobles of Scotland proposed to go in a body to +Stirling to take Cochrane, the favourite of James the Third, and hang +him, the Lord Gray asked, "It is well said, but wha will bell the cat?" +The Earl of Angus accepted the challenge, and effected the object. To +his dying day he was called Archibald Bell-the-Cat. + +_Ye hae tint the tongue o' the trump._ "Trump" is a Jew's harp. To lose +the tongue of it is to lose what is essential to its sound. + +_Meat and mass hinders nae man._ Needful food, and suitable religious +exercises, should not be spared under greatest haste. + +_Ye fand it whar the Highlandman fand the tangs_ (i.e. at the fireside). +A hit at our mountain neighbours, who occasionally took from the +Lowlands--as having found--something that was never lost. + +_His head will ne'er rive_ (i.e. tear) _his father's bonnet_. A +picturesque way of expressing that the son will never equal the +influence and ability of his sire. + +_His bark is waur nor his bite._ A good-natured apology for one who is +good-hearted and rough in speech. + +_Do as the cow of Forfar did, tak a standing drink_. This proverb +relates to an occurrence which gave rise to a lawsuit and a whimsical +legal decision. A woman in Forfar, who was brewing, set out her tub of +beer to cool. A cow came by and drank it up. The owner of the cow was +sued for compensation, but the bailies of Forfar, who tried the case, +acquitted the owner of the cow, on the ground that the farewell drink, +called in the Highlands the _dochan doris_[142], or stirrup-cup, taken +by the guest standing by the door, was never charged; and as the cow +had taken but a standing drink outside, it could not, according to the +Scottish usage, be chargeable. Sir Walter Scott has humorously alluded +to this circumstance in the notes to _Waverley_, but has not mentioned +it as the subject of an old Scotch proverb. + +_Bannocks are better nor nae kind o' bread._ Evidently Scottish. Better +have oatmeal cakes to eat than be in want of wheaten loaves. + +_Folly is a bonny dog._ Meaning, I suppose, that many are imposed upon +by the false appearances and attractions of vicious pleasures. + +_The e'ening brings a' hame_ is an interesting saying, meaning, that the +evening of life, or the approach of death, softens many of our political +and religious differences. I do not find this proverb in the older +collections, but Sir William Maxwell justly calls it "a beautiful +proverb, which, lending itself to various uses, may be taken as an +expression of faith in the gradual growth and spread of large-hearted +Christian charity, the noblest result of our happy freedom of thought +and discussion." The literal idea of the "e'ening bringing a' hame," has +a high and illustrious antiquity, as in the fragment of Sappho, [Greek: +'Espere, panta phereis--phereis oin (or oinon) phereis aiga, phereis +maeteri paida]--which is thus paraphrased by Lord Byron in Don Juan, +iii. 107:-- + + "O Hesperus, thou bringest all good things-- + Home to the weary, to the hungry cheer; + To the young birds the parent's brooding wings, + The welcome stall to the o'erlaboured steer, etc. + Thou bring'st the child, too, to the mother's breast." + +A similar graceful and moral saying inculcates an acknowledgment of +gratitude for the past favours which we have enjoyed when we come to +the close of the day or the close of life-- + + _Ruse[143] the fair day at e'en._ + +But a very learned and esteemed friend has suggested another reading of +this proverb, in accordance with the celebrated saying of Solon (Arist. +Eth. N.I. 10): [Greek: Kata Solona chreon telos hozan]--Do not praise +the fairness of the day _till_ evening; do not call the life happy +_till_ you have seen the close; or, in other matters, do not boast that +all is well till you have conducted your undertaking to a +prosperous end. + +_Let him tak a spring on his ain fiddle._ Spoken of a foolish and +unreasonable person; as if to say, "We will for the present allow him to +have his own way." Bailie Nicol Jarvie quotes the proverb with great +bitterness, when he warns his opponent that _his_ time for triumph will +come ere long,--"Aweel, aweel, sir, you're welcome to a tune on your ain +fiddle; but see if I dinna gar ye dance till't afore it's dune." + +_The kirk is meikle, but ye may say mass in ae end o't;_ or, as I have +received it in another form, "If we canna preach in the kirk, we can +sing mass in the quire." This intimates, where something is alleged to +be too much, that you need take no more than what you have need for. I +heard the proverb used in this sense by Sir Walter Scott at his own +table. His son had complained of some quaighs which Sir Walter had +produced for a dram after dinner, that they were too large. His answer +was, "Well, Walter, as my good mother used to say, if the kirk is ower +big, just sing mass in the quire." Here is another reference to kirk and +quire--_He rives[144] the kirk to theik[145] the quire_. Spoken of +unprofitable persons, who in the English proverb, "rob Peter to +pay Paul." + +_The king's errand may come the cadger's gate yet._ A great man may need +the service of a very mean one. + +_The maut is aboon the meal._ His liquor has done more for him than his +meat. The man is drunk. + +_Mak a kirk and a mill o't._ Turn a thing to any purpose you like; or +rather, spoken sarcastically, Take it, and make the best of it. + +_Like a sow playing on a trump._ No image could be well more incongruous +than a pig performing on a Jew's harp. + +_Mair by luck than gude guiding._ His success is due to his fortunate +circumstances, rather than to his own discretion. + +_He's not a man to ride the water wi'._ A common Scottish saying to +express you cannot trust such an one in trying times. May have arisen +from the districts where fords abounded, and the crossing them was +dangerous. + +_He rides on the riggin o' the kirk._ The rigging being the top of the +roof, the proverb used to be applied to those who carried their zeal for +church matters to the extreme point. + +_Leal heart never lee'd,_ well expresses that an honest loyal +disposition will scorn, under all circumstances, to tell a falsehood. + +A common Scottish proverb, _Let that flee stick to the wa'_, has an +obvious meaning,--"Say nothing more on that subject." But the derivation +is not obvious[146]. In like manner, the meaning of _He that will to +Cupar maun to Cupar_, is clearly that if a man is obstinate, and bent +upon his own dangerous course, he must take it. But why Cupar? and +whether is it the Cupar of Angus or the Cupar of Fife? + +_Kindness creeps where it canna gang_ prettily expresses that where love +can do little, it will do that little, though it cannot do more. + +In my part of the country a ridiculous addition used to be made to the +common Scottish saying. _Mony a thing's made for the pennie_, i.e. Many +contrivances are thought of to get money. The addition is, "As the old +woman said when she saw a black man," taking it for granted that he was +an ingenious and curious piece of mechanism made for profit. + +_Bluid is thicker than water_ is a proverb which has a marked Scottish +aspect, as meant to vindicate those family predilections to which, as a +nation, we are supposed to be rather strongly inclined. + +_There's aye water where the stirkie[147] drouns._ Where certain effects +are produced, there must be some causes at work--a proverb used to show +that a universal popular suspicion as to an obvious effect must be +laid in truth. + +_Better a finger aff than aye waggin_'. This proverb I remember as a +great favourite with many Scotch people. Better experience the worst, +than have an evil always pending. + +_Cadgers are aye cracking o' crook saddles_[148] has a very Scottish +aspect, and signifies that professional men are very apt to talk too +much of their profession. + +The following is purely Scotch, for in no country but Scotland are +singed sheep heads to be met with: _He's like a sheep head in a pair +o' tangs._ + +_As sure's deeth_. A common Scottish proverbial expression to signify +either the truth or certainty of a fact, or to pledge the speaker to a +performance of his promise. In the latter sense an amusing illustration +of faith in the superior obligation of this asseveration to any other, +is recorded in the _Eglinton Papers_[149]. The Earl one day found a boy +climbing up a tree, and called him to come down. The boy declined, +because, he said, the Earl would thrash him. His Lordship pledged his +honour that he would not do so. The boy replied, "I dinna ken onything +about your honour, but if you say as sure's deeth I'll come doun." + +Proverbs are sometimes local in their application. + +_The men o' the Mearns canna do mair than they may._ Even the men of +Kincardineshire can only do their utmost--a proverb intended to be +highly complimentary to the powers of the men of that county. + +_I'll mak Cathkin's covenant wi' you, Let abee for let abee._ This is a +local saying quoted often in Hamilton. The laird of that property +had--very unlike the excellent family who have now possessed it for more +than a century--been addicted to intemperance. One of his neighbours, in +order to frighten him on his way home from his evening potations, +disguised himself, on a very wet night, and, personating the devil, +claimed a title to carry him off as his rightful property. Contrary to +all expectation, however, the laird showed fight, and was about to +commence the onslaught, when a parley was proposed, and the issue was, +"Cathkin's covenant, Let abee for let abee." + +_When the castle of Stirling gets a hat, the Carse of Corntown pays for +that._ This is a local proverbial saying; the meaning is, that when the +clouds descend so low as to envelope Stirling Castle, a deluge of rain +may be expected in the adjacent country. + +I will conclude this notice of our proverbial reminiscences, by adding a +cluster of Scottish proverbs, selected from an excellent article on the +general subject in the _North British Review_ of February 1858. The +reviewer designates these as "broader in their mirth, and more caustic +in their tone," than the moral proverbial expressions of the Spanish and +Italian:-- + + _A blate[150] cat maks a proud mouse. + Better a toom[151] house than an ill tenant. + Jouk[152] and let the jaw[153] gang by. + Mony ane speirs the gate[154] he kens fu' weel. + The tod[155] ne'er sped better than when he gaed his ain errand. + A wilfu' man should be unco wise. + He that has a meikle nose thinks ilka ane speaks o't. + He that teaches himsell has a fule for his maister. + It's an ill cause that the lawyer thinks shame o'. + Lippen[156] to me, but look to yoursell. + Mair whistle than woo, as the souter said when shearing the soo. + Ye gae far about seeking the nearest. + Ye'll no sell your hen on a rainy day. + Ye'll mend when ye grow better. + Ye're nae chicken for a' your cheepin'_[157]. + +I have now adduced quite sufficient specimens to convince those who may +not have given attention to the subject, how much of wisdom, knowledge +of life, and good feeling, are contained in these aphorisms which +compose the mass of our Scottish proverbial sayings. No doubt, to many +of my younger readers proverbs are little known, and to all they are +becoming more and more matters of reminiscence. I am quite convinced +that much of the old quaint and characteristic Scottish talk which we +are now endeavouring to recall depended on a happy use of those +abstracts of moral sentiment. And this feeling will be confirmed when we +call to mind how often those of the old Scottish school of character, +whose conversation we have ourselves admired, had most largely availed +themselves of the use of its _proverbial_ philosophy. + +I have already spoken of (p. 16) a Scottish peculiarity--viz. that of +naming individuals from lands which have been possessed long by the +family, or frequently from the landed estates which they acquire. The +use of this mode of discriminating individuals in the Highland districts +is sufficiently obvious. Where the inhabitants of a whole country-side +are Campbells, or Frasers, or Gordons, nothing could be more convenient +than addressing the individuals of each clan by the name of his estate. +Indeed, some years ago, any other designation, as Mr. Campbell, Mr. +Fraser, would have been resented as an indignity. Their consequence +sprang from their possession[158]. But all this is fast wearing away. +The estates of old families have often changed hands, and Highlanders +are most unwilling to give the names of old properties to new +proprietors. The custom, however, lingers amongst us, in the northern +districts especially. Farms also used to give their names to the +tenants[159]. I can recall an amusing instance of this practice +belonging to my early days. The oldest recollections I have are +connected with the name, the figure, the sayings and doings, of the old +cow-herd at Fasque in my father's time; his name was Boggy, _i.e._ his +ordinary appellation; his true name was Sandy Anderson. But he was +called Boggy from the circumstance of having once held a wretched farm +on Deeside named Boggendreep. He had long left it, and been unfortunate +in it, but the name never left him,--he was Boggy to his grave. The +territorial appellation used to be reckoned complimentary, and more +respectful than Mr. or any higher title to which the individual might be +entitled. I recollect, in my brother's time, at Fasque, his showing off +some of his home stock to Mr. Williamson, the Aberdeen butcher. They +came to a fine stot, and Sir Alexander said, with some appearance of +boast, "I was offered twenty guineas for that ox." "Indeed, Fasque," +said Williamson, "ye should hae steekit your neive upo' that." + +Sir Walter Scott had marked in his diary a territorial greeting of two +proprietors which had amused him much. The laird of Kilspindie had met +the laird of Tannachy-Tulloch, and the following compliments passed +between them:--"Yer maist obedient hummil servant, Tannachy-Tulloch." To +which the reply was, "Yer nain man, Kilspindie." + +In proportion as we advance towards the Highland district this custom of +distinguishing clans or races, and marking them out according to the +district they occupied, became more apparent. There was the Glengarry +country, the Fraser country, the Gordon country, etc. etc. These names +carried also with them certain moral features as characteristic of each +division. Hence the following anecdote:--The morning litany of an old +laird of Cultoquhey, when he took his morning draught at the cauld well, +was in these terms:--"Frae the ire o' the Drummonds, the pride o' the +Graemes, the greed o' the Campbells, and the wind o' the Murrays, guid +Lord deliver us." + +The Duke of Athole, having learned that Cultoquhey was in the habit of +mentioning his Grace's family in such uncomplimentary terms, invited the +humorist to Dunkeld, for the purpose of giving him a hint to desist from +the reference. After dinner, the Duke asked his guest what were the +precise terms in which he was in the habit of alluding to his powerful +neighbours. Cultoquhey repeated his liturgy without a moment's +hesitation. "I recommend you," said his Grace, looking very angry, "in +future to omit my name from your morning devotions." All he got from +Cultoquhey was, "Thank ye, my Lord Duke," taking off his glass with the +utmost sangfroid. + +FOOTNOTES: + +[49] Stoor is, Scottice, dust in motion, and has no English synonym; oor +is hour. Sir Walter Scott is said to have advised an artist, in painting +a battle, not to deal with details, but to get up a good _stoor_: then +put in an arm and a sword here and there, and leave all the rest to the +imagination of the spectator. + +[50] Reach me a leg of that turkey. + +[51] Clearing ashes out of the bars of the grate. + +[52] Mentally confused. Muddy when applied to water. + +[53] Preface to 4th edition of _Mystifications_, by Dr. John Brown. + +[54] Worse. + +[55] Where. + +[56] Lord Cockburn's _Memorials_, p. 58. + +[57] Frogs. + +[58] Killed. + +[59] Miss Jenny Methven. + +[60] "Civil," "obliging."--Jamieson. + +[61] _Dam_, the game of draughts. + +[62] _Brod_, the board. + +[63] Measles. + +[64] Nettle-rash. + +[65] The itch. + +[66] Whooping-cough. + +[67] Mumps. + +[68] Toothache. + +[69] The Scotticisms are printed in italics. + +[70] Delicate in health. + +[71] Ailment. + +[72] Yawning. + +[73] Catching. + +[74] Tea-urn + +[75] _Ver_, the spring months.--_e.g._ "This was in _ver_ quhen wynter +tid."--_Barbour_. + +[76] A number. + +[77] Young girls. + +[78] Gallows birds. + +[79] whistling noises. + +[80] Distorted gestures. + +[81] Honey jar. + +[82] A kind of loose gown formerly worn. + +[83] Amongst many acts of kindness and essential assistance which I have +received and am constantly receiving from my friend Mr. Hugh James +Rollo, I owe my introduction to this interesting Scottish volume, now, I +believe, rather scarce. + +[84] Kelly's book is constantly quoted by Jamieson, and is, indeed, an +excellent work for the study of good old Scotch. + +[85] This probably throws back the collection to about the middle of the +century. + +[86] Nurse. + +[87] Daw, a slut. + +[88] Would. + +[89] Forgive. + +[90] Going or moving. + +[91] Foot. + +[92] Always. + +[93] If. + +[94] Boasters. + +[95] Used as cowards(?) + +[96] Jest. + +[97] A dog's name. + +[98] To skail house, to disfurnish. + +[99] Being angry or cross. + +[100] Judge. + +[101] Know not. + +[102] Blames. + +[103] To aim at. + +[104] A stroke. + +[105] Full. + +[106] Hold. + +[107] Potent or strong. + +[108] Is angry. + +[109] Settle. + +[110] Amends. + +[111] Comb. + +[112] Seldom. + +[113] Painfully. + +[114] Wool-combers. + +[115] Greasy. + +[116] Worthless fellow. + +[117] Loses. + +[118] Sixpenny. + +[119] A sort of dagger or hanger which seems to have been used both at +meals as a knife and in broils-- + + "And _whingers_ now in friendship bare, + The social meal to part and share, + Had found a bloody sheath." + +--_Lay of the Last Minstrel_. + +[120] Thong. + +[121] No lawsuit. + +[122] Robbers. + +[123] Rue, to repent. + +[124] More. + +[125] Maidens. + +[126] Hares. + +[127] Take after. + +[128] Cuckoo. + +[129] Note. + +[130] Attired. + +[131] Curried. + +[132] Related. + +[133] Outrun. + +[134] Tune. + +[135] Curtsied. + +[136] Fallen. + +[137] Surprise. + +[138] Christmas. + +[139] Pasch or Easter. + +[140] Early. + +[141] Severe. + +[142] The proper orthography of this expression is deoch-an-doruis (or +dorais). _Deoch_, a drink; _an_, of the; _doruis_ or _dorais_, +possessive case of dorus or doras a door. + +[143] Praise. + +[144] Tears. + +[145] Thatch. + +[146] It has been suggested, and with much reason, that the reference is +to a fly sticking on a wet or a newly painted wall; this is corroborated +by the addition in Rob Roy, "When the dirt's dry, it will rub out," +which seems to point out the meaning and derivation of the proverb. + +[147] A young bullock. + +[148] Saddle for supporting panniers. + +[149] Vol. i. p. 134. + +[150] Shy. + +[151] Empty. + +[152] Stoop down. + +[153] Wave. + +[154] The way. + +[155] Fox. + +[156] Trust to. + +[157] Chirping. + +[158] Even in Forfarshire, where Carnegies abound, we had Craigo, +Balnamoon, Pitarrow, etc. + +[159] This custom is still in use in Galloway; and "Challoch," +"Eschonchan," "Tonderghie," "Balsalloch," and "Drummorral," etc. etc., +appear regularly at kirk and market. + + + +CHAPTER THE SEVENTH. + +ON SCOTTISH STORIES OF WIT AND HUMOUR. + +The portion of our subject which we proposed under the head of +"Reminiscences of Scottish Stories of Wit or Humour," yet remains to be +considered. This is closely connected with the question of Scottish +dialect and expressions; indeed, on some points hardly separable, as the +wit, to a great extent, proceeds from the quaint and picturesque modes +of expressing it. But here we are met by a difficulty. On high authority +it has been declared that no such thing as wit exists amongst us. What +has no existence can have no change. We cannot be said to have lost a +quality which we never possessed. Many of my readers are no doubt +familiar with what Sydney Smith declared on this point, and certainly on +the question of wit he must be considered an authority. He used to say +(I am almost ashamed to repeat it), "It requires a surgical operation to +get a joke well into a Scotch understanding. Their only idea of wit, +which prevails occasionally in the north, and which, under the name of +WUT, is so infinitely distressing to people of good taste, is laughing +immoderately at stated intervals." Strange language to use of a country +which has produced Smollett, Burns, Scott, Galt, and Wilson--all +remarkable for the humour diffused through their writings! Indeed, we +may fairly ask, have they equals in this respect amongst English +writers? Charles Lamb had the same notion, or, I should rather say, the +same prejudice, about Scottish people not being accessible to wit; and +he tells a story of what happened to himself, in corroboration of the +opinion. He had been asked to a party, and one object of the invitation +had been to meet a son of Burns. When he arrived, Mr. Burns had not made +his appearance, and in the course of conversation regarding the family +of the poet, Lamb, in his lack-a-daisical kind of manner, said, "I wish +it had been the father instead of the son;" upon which four Scotsmen +present with one voice exclaimed, "That's impossible, for _he's +dead_[160]." Now, there will be dull men and matter-of-fact men +everywhere, who do not take a joke, or enter into a jocular allusion; +but surely, as a general remark, this is far from being a natural +quality of our country. Sydney Smith and Charles Lamb say so. But, at +the risk of being considered presumptuous, I will say I think them +entirely mistaken. I should say that there was, on the contrary, a +strong _connection_ between the Scottish temperament and, call it if you +like, humour, if it is not wit. And what is the difference? My readers +need not be afraid that they are to be led through a labyrinth of +metaphysical distinctions between wit and humour. I have read Dr. +Campbell's dissertation on the difference, in his Philosophy of +Rhetoric; I have read Sydney Smith's own two lectures; but I confess I +am not much the wiser. Professors of rhetoric, no doubt, must have such +discussions; but when you wish to be amused by the thing itself, it is +somewhat disappointing to be presented with metaphysical analysis. It is +like instituting an examination of the glass and cork of a champagne +bottle, and a chemical testing of the wine. In the very process the +volatile and sparkling draught which was to delight the palate has +become like ditch water, vapid and dead. What I mean is, that, call it +wit or humour, or what you please, there is a school of Scottish +pleasantry, amusing and characteristic beyond all other. Don't think of +_analysing_ its nature, or the qualities of which it is composed; enjoy +its quaint and amusing flow of oddity and fun; as we may, for instance, +suppose it to have flowed on that eventful night so joyously described +by Burns:-- + + "The souter tauld his queerest stories, + The landlord's laugh was ready chorus." + +Or we may think of the delight it gave the good Mr. Balwhidder, when he +tells, in his Annals of the Parish, of some such story, that it was a +"jocosity that was just a kittle to hear." When I speak of changes in +such Scottish humour which have taken place, I refer to a particular +sort of humour, and I speak of the sort of feeling that belongs to +Scottish pleasantry,--which is sly, and cheery, and pawky. It is +undoubtedly a humour that depends a good deal upon the vehicle in which +the story is conveyed. If, as we have said, our quaint dialect is +passing away, and our national eccentric points of character, we must +expect to find much of the peculiar humour allied with them to have +passed away also. In other departments of wit and repartee, and acute +hits at men and things, Scotsmen (whatever Sydney Smith may have said to +the contrary) are equal to their neighbours, and, so far as I know, may +have gained rather than lost. But this peculiar humour of which I now +speak has not, in our day, the scope and development which were +permitted to it by the former generation. Where the tendency exists, the +exercise of it is kept down by the usages and feelings of society. For +examples of it (in its full force at any rate) we must go back to a race +who are departed. One remark, however, has occurred to me in regard to +the specimens we have of this kind of humour--viz. that they do not +always proceed from the personal wit or cleverness of any of the +individuals concerned in them. The amusement comes from the +circumstances, from the concurrence or combination of the ideas, and in +many cases from the mere expressions which describe the facts. The +humour of the narrative is unquestionable, and yet no one has tried to +be humorous. In short, it is the _Scottishness_ that gives the zest. The +same ideas differently expounded might have no point at all. There is, +for example, something highly original in the notions of celestial +mechanics entertained by an honest Scottish Fife lass regarding the +theory of comets. Having occasion to go out after dark, and having +observed the brilliant comet then visible (1858), she ran in with +breathless haste to the house, calling on her fellow-servants to "Come +oot and see a new star that hasna got its tail cuttit aff yet!" +Exquisite astronomical speculation! Stars, like puppies, are born with +tails, and in due time have them docked. Take an example of a story +where there is no display of any one's wit or humour, and yet it is a +good story, and one can't exactly say why:--An English traveller had +gone on a fine Highland road so long, without having seen an indication +of fellow-travellers, that he became astonished at the solitude of the +country; and no doubt before the Highlands were so much frequented as +they are in our time, the roads sometimes bore a very striking aspect of +solitariness. Our traveller, at last coming up to an old man breaking +stones, asked him if there was _any_ traffic on this road--was it at +_all_ frequented? "Ay," he said, coolly, "it's no ill at that; there was +a cadger body yestreen, and there's yoursell the day." No English +version of the story could have half such amusement, or have so quaint a +character. An answer even still more characteristic is recorded to have +been given by a countryman to a traveller. Being doubtful of his way, he +inquired if he were on the right road to Dunkeld. With some of his +national inquisitiveness about strangers, the countryman asked his +inquirer where he came from. Offended at the liberty, as he considered +it, he sharply reminded the man that where he came from was nothing to +him; but all the answer he got was the quiet rejoinder, "Indeed, it's +just as little to me whar ye're gaen." A friend has told me of an answer +highly characteristic of this dry and unconcerned quality which he heard +given to a fellow-traveller. A gentleman sitting opposite to him in the +stage-coach at Berwick complained bitterly that the cushion on which he +sat was quite wet. On looking up to the roof he saw a hole through which +the rain descended copiously, and at once accounted for the mischief. He +called for the coachman, and in great wrath reproached him with the evil +under which he suffered, and pointed to the hole which was the cause of +it. All the satisfaction, however, that he got was the quiet unmoved +reply, "Ay, mony a ane has complained o' _that_ hole." Another anecdote +I heard from a gentleman who vouched for the truth, which is just a case +where the narrative has its humour not from the wit which is displayed +but from that dry matter-of-fact view of things peculiar to some of our +countrymen. The friend of my informant was walking in a street of Perth, +when, to his horror, he saw a workman fall from a roof where he was +mending slates, right upon the pavement. By extraordinary good fortune +he was not killed, and on the gentleman going up to his assistance, and +exclaiming, with much excitement, "God bless me, are you much hurt?" all +the answer he got was the cool rejoinder, "On the contrary, sir." A +similar matter-of fact answer was made by one of the old race of +Montrose humorists. He was coming out of church, and in the press of the +kirk _skailing_, a young man thoughtlessly trod on the old gentleman's +toe, which was tender with corns. He hastened to apologise, saying, "I +am very sorry, sir; I beg your pardon." The only acknowledgment of which +was the dry answer, "And ye've as muckle need, sir." An old man marrying +a very young wife, his friends rallied him on the inequality of their +ages. "She will be near me," he replied, "to close my een." "Weel," +remarked another of the party, "I've had twa wives, and they _opened +my een_." + +One of the best specimens of cool Scottish matter-of-fact view of things +has been supplied by a kind correspondent, who narrates it from his own +personal recollection. + +The back windows of the house where he was brought up looked upon the +Greyfriars Church that was burnt down. On the Sunday morning in which +that event took place, as they were all preparing to go to church, the +flames began to burst forth; the young people screamed from the back +part of the house, "A fire! A fire!" and all was in a state of confusion +and alarm. The housemaid was not at home, it being her turn for the +Sunday "out." Kitty, the cook, was taking her place, and performing her +duties. The old woman was always very particular on the subject of her +responsibility on such occasions, and came panting and hobbling up +stairs from the lower regions, and exclaimed, "Oh, what is't, what +is't?" "O Kitty, look here, the Greyfriars Church is on fire!" "Is that +a', Miss? What a fricht ye geed me! I thought ye said the parlour +fire was out." + +In connection with the subject of Scottish _toasts_ I am supplied by a +first-rate Highland authority of one of the most graceful and crushing +replies of a lady to what was intended as a sarcastic compliment and +smart saying at her expense. + +About the beginning of the present century the then Campbell of Combie, +on Loch Awe side, in Argyleshire, was a man of extraordinary character, +and of great physical strength, and such swiftness of foot that it is +said he could "catch the best _tup_ on the hill." He also looked upon +himself as a "pretty man," though in this he was singular; also, it was +more than whispered that the laird was not remarkable for his principles +of honesty. There also lived in the same district a Miss MacNabb of +Bar-a'-Chaistril, a lady who, before she had passed the zenith of life, +had never been remarkable for her beauty--the contrary even had passed +into a proverb, while she was in her teens; but, to counterbalance this +defect in external qualities, nature had endowed her with great +benevolence, while she was renowned for her probity. One day the Laird +of Combie, who piqued himself on his _bon-mots,_ was, as frequently +happened, a guest of Miss MacNabb's, and after dinner several toasts had +gone round as usual, Combie rose with great solemnity and addressing the +lady of the house requested an especial bumper, insisting on all the +guests to fill to the brim. He then rose and said, addressing himself to +Miss MacNabb, "I propose the old Scottish toast of 'Honest men and +_bonnie_ lassies,'" and bowing to the hostess, he resumed his seat. The +lady returned his bow with her usual amiable smile, and taking up her +glass, replied, "Weel, Combie, I am sure _we_ may drink that, for it +will neither apply to _you_ nor _me_." + +An amusing example of a quiet cool view of a pecuniary transaction +happened to my father whilst doing the business of the rent-day. He was +receiving sums of money from the tenants in succession. After looking +over a bundle of notes which he had just received from one of them, a +well-known character, he said in banter, "James, the notes are not +correct." To which the farmer, who was much of a humorist, drily +answered, "I dinna ken what they may be _noo_; but they were a' richt +afore ye had your fingers in amang 'em." An English farmer would hardly +have spoken thus to his landlord. The Duke of Buccleuch told me an +answer very quaintly Scotch, given to his grandmother by a farmer of the +old school. A dinner was given to some tenantry of the vast estates of +the family, in the time of Duke Henry. His Duchess (the last descendant +of the Dukes of Montague) always appeared at table on such occasions, +and did the honours with that mixture of dignity and of affable kindness +for which she was so remarkable. Abundant hospitality was shown to all +the guests. The Duchess, having observed one of the tenants supplied +with boiled beef from a noble round, proposed that he should add a +supply of cabbage: on his declining, the Duchess good-humouredly +remarked, "Why, boiled beef and 'greens' seem so naturally to go +together, I wonder you don't take it." To which the honest farmer +objected, "Ah, but your Grace maun alloo it's a vary _windy_ vegetable," +in delicate allusion to the flatulent quality of the esculent. Similar +to this was the naive answer of a farmer on the occasion of a rent-day. +The lady of the house asked him if he would take some "rhubarb-tart," to +which he innocently answered, "Thank ye, mem, I dinna _need_ it." + +A Highland minister, dining with the patroness of his parish, ventured +to say, "I'll thank your leddyship for a little more of that +apple-tart;" "It's not apple-tart, it's rhubarb," replied the lady. +"Rhubarb!" repeated the other, with a look of surprise and alarm, and +immediately called out to the attendant, "Freend, I'll thank you for +a dram." + +A characteristic _table_ anecdote I can recall amongst Deeside +reminiscences. My aunt, Mrs. Forbes, had entertained an honest Scotch +farmer at Banchory Lodge; a draught of ale had been offered to him, +which he had quickly despatched. My aunt observing that the glass had no +head or effervescence, observed, that she feared it had not been a good +bottle, "Oh, vera gude, maam, it's just some strong o' the aaple," an +expression which indicates the beer to be somewhat sharp or pungent. It +turned out to have been a bottle of _vinegar_ decanted by mistake. + +An amusing instance of an old Scottish farmer being unacquainted with +table refinements occurred at a tenant's dinner in the north. The +servant had put down beside him a dessert spoon when he had been helped +to pudding. This seemed quite superfluous to the honest man, who +exclaimed, "Tak' it awa, my man; my mou's as big for puddin' as it is +for kail." + +Amongst the lower orders in Scotland humour is found, occasionally, +very rich in mere children, and I recollect a remarkable illustration of +this early native humour occurring in a family in Forfarshire, where I +used in former days to be very intimate. A wretched woman, who used to +traverse the country as a beggar or tramp, left a poor, half-starved +little girl by the road-side, near the house of my friends. Always ready +to assist the unfortunate, they took charge of the child, and as she +grew a little older they began to give her some education, and taught +her to read. She soon made some progress in reading the Bible, and the +native odd humour of which we speak began soon to show itself. On +reading the passage, which began, "Then David rose," etc., the child +stopped, and looked up knowingly, to say, "I ken wha that was," and on +being asked what she could mean, she confidently said, "That's David +Rowse the pleuchman." And again, reading the passage where the words +occur, "He took Paul's girdle," the child said, with much confidence, "I +ken what he took that for," and on being asked to explain, replied at +once, "To bake 's bannocks on;" "girdle" being in the north the name for +the iron plate hung over the fire for baking oat cakes or bannocks. + +To a distinguished member of the Church of Scotland I am indebted for an +excellent story of quaint child humour, which he had from the lips of an +old woman who related the story of herself:--When a girl of eight years +of age she was taken by her grandmother to church. The parish minister +was not only a long preacher, but, as the custom was, delivered two +sermons on the Sabbath day without any interval, and thus saved the +parishioners the two journeys to church. Elizabeth was sufficiently +wearied before the close of the first discourse; but when, after singing +and prayer, the good minister opened the Bible, read a second text, and +prepared to give a second sermon, the young girl, being both tired and +hungry, lost all patience, and cried out to her grandmother, to the no +small amusement of those who were so near as to hear her, "Come awa, +granny, and gang hame; this is a lang grace, and nae meat." + +A most amusing account of child humour used to be narrated by an old Mr. +Campbell of Jura, who told the story of his own son. It seems the boy +was much spoilt by indulgence. In fact, the parents were scarce able to +refuse him anything he demanded. He was in the drawing-room on one +occasion when dinner was announced, and on being ordered up to the +nursery he insisted on going down to dinner with the company. His mother +was for refusal, but the child persevered, and kept saying, "If I dinna +gang, I'll tell thon." His father then, for peace sake, let him go. So +he went and sat at table by his mother. When he found every one getting +soup and himself omitted, he demanded soup, and repeated, "If I dinna +get it, I'll tell thon." Well, soup was given, and various other things +yielded to his importunities, to which he always added the usual threat +of "telling thon." At last, when it came to wine, his mother stood firm, +and positively refused, as "a bad thing for little boys," and so on. He +then became more vociferous than ever about "telling thon;" and as still +he was refused, he declared, "Now, I will tell thon," and at last roared +out, "_Ma new breeks were made oot o' the auld curtains_!" + +The Rev. Mr. Agnew has kindly sent me an anecdote which supplies an +example of cleverness in a Scottish boy, and which rivals, as he +observes, the smartness of the London boy, termed by _Punch_ the "Street +boy." It has also a touch of quiet, sly Scottish _humour_. A gentleman, +editor of a Glasgow paper, well known as a bon-vivant and epicure, and +by no means a popular character, was returning one day from his office, +and met near his own house a boy carrying a splendid salmon. The +gentleman looked at it with longing eyes, and addressed the boy--"Where +are you taking that salmon, my boy?" Boy--"Do you ken gin ae Mr. ---- +(giving the gentleman's name) lives hereabout?" Mr. ---- "Yes, oh yes; +his house is here just by." Boy (looking sly)--"Weel, it's no for him." +Of this same Scottish _boy cleverness_, the Rev. Mr. M'Lure of Marykirk +kindly supplies a capital specimen, in an instance which occurred at +what is called the market, at Fettercairn, where there is always a +hiring of servants. A boy was asked by a farmer if he wished to be +engaged. "Ou ay," said the youth. "Wha was your last maister?" was the +next question. "Oh, yonder him," said the boy; and then agreeing to wait +where he was standing with some other servants till the inquirer should +return from examination of the boy's late employer. The farmer returned +and accosted the boy, "Weel, lathie, I've been speerin' about ye, an' +I'm tae tak ye." "Ou ay," was the prompt reply, "an' I've been speerin' +about _ye tae_, an' I'm nae gaen." + +We could not have had a better specimen of the cool self-sufficiency of +these young domestics of the Scottish type than the following:--I heard +of a boy making a very cool and determined exit from the house into +which he had very lately been introduced. He had been told that he +should be dismissed if he broke any of the china that was under his +charge. On the morning of a great dinner-party he was entrusted (rather +rashly) with a great load of plates, which he was to carry up-stairs +from the kitchen to the dining-room, and which were piled up, and +rested upon his two hands. In going up-stairs his foot slipped, and the +plates were broken to atoms. He at once went up to the drawing-room, put +his head in at the door, and shouted: "The plates are a' smashed, +and I'm awa." + +A facetious and acute friend, who rather leans to the Sydney Smith view +of Scottish wit, declares that all our humorous stories are about +lairds, and lairds that are drunk. Of such stories there are certainly +not a few. The following is one of the best belonging to my part of the +country, and to many persons I should perhaps apologise for introducing +it at all. The story has been told of various parties and localities, +but no doubt the genuine laird was a laird of Balnamoon (pronounced in +the country Bonnymoon), and that the locality was a wild tract of land, +not far from his place, called Munrimmon Moor. Balnamoon had been dining +out in the neighbourhood, where, by mistake, they had put down to him +after dinner cherry brandy, instead of port wine, his usual beverage. +The rich flavour and strength so pleased him that, having tasted it, he +would have nothing else. On rising from table, therefore, the laird +would be more affected by his drink than if he had taken his ordinary +allowance of port. His servant Harry or Hairy was to drive him home in a +gig, or whisky as it was called, the usual open carriage of the time. On +crossing the moor, however, whether from greater exposure to the blast, +or from the laird's unsteadiness of head, his hat and wig came off and +fell upon the ground. Harry got out to pick them up and restore them to +his master. The laird was satisfied with the hat, but demurred at the +wig. "It's no my wig, Hairy, lad; it's no my wig," and refused to have +anything to do with it. Hairy lost his patience, and, anxious to get +home, remonstrated with his master, "Ye'd better tak it, sir, for +there's nae _waile_[161] o' wigs on Munrimmon Moor." The humour of the +argument is exquisite, putting to the laird in his unreasonable +objection the sly insinuation that in such a locality, if he did not +take _this_ wig, he was not likely to find another. Then, what a rich +expression, "waile o' wigs." In English what is it? "A choice of +perukes;" which is nothing comparable to the "waile o' wigs." I ought to +mention also an amusing sequel to the story, viz. in what happened after +the affair of the wig had been settled, and the laird had consented to +return home. When the whisky drove up to the door, Hairy, sitting in +front, told the servant who came "to tak out the laird." No laird was to +be seen; and it appeared that he had fallen out on the moor without +Hairy observing it. Of course, they went back, and, picking him up, +brought him safe home. A neighbouring laird having called a few days +after, and having referred to the accident, Balnamoon quietly added, +"Indeed, I maun hae a lume[162] that'll _haud in_." + +The laird of Balnamoon was a truly eccentric character. He joined with +his drinking propensities a great zeal for the Episcopal church, the +service of which he read to his own family with much solemnity and +earnestness of manner. Two gentlemen, one of them a stranger to the +country, having called pretty early one Sunday morning, Balnamoon +invited them to dinner, and as they accepted the invitation, they +remained and joined in the forenoon devotional exercises conducted by +Balnamoon himself. The stranger was much impressed with the laird's +performance of the service, and during a walk which they took before +dinner, mentioned to his friend how highly he esteemed the religious +deportment of their host. The gentleman said nothing, but smiled to +himself at the scene which he anticipated was to follow. After dinner, +Balnamoon set himself, according to the custom of old hospitable +Scottish hosts, to make his guests as drunk as possible. The result was, +that the party spent the evening in a riotous debauch, and were carried +to bed by the servants at a late hour. Next day, when they had taken +leave and left the house, the gentleman who had introduced his friend +asked him what he thought of their entertainer--"Why, really," he +replied, with evident astonishment, "sic a speat o' praying, and sic a +speat o' drinking, I never knew in the whole course o' my life." + +Lady Dalhousie, mother, I mean, of the late distinguished Marquis of +Dalhousie, used to tell a characteristic anecdote of her day. But here, +on mention of the name Christian, Countess of Dalhousie, may I pause a +moment to recall the memory of one who was a very remarkable person. She +was for many years, to me and mine, a sincere, and true and valuable +friend. By an awful dispensation of God's providence her death happened +_instantaneously_ under my roof in 1839. Lady Dalhousie was eminently +distinguished for a fund of the most varied knowledge, for a clear and +powerful judgment, for acute observation, a kind heart, a brilliant wit. +Her story was thus:--A Scottish judge, somewhat in the predicament of +the Laird of Balnamoon, had dined at Coalstoun with her father Charles +Brown, an advocate, and son of George Brown, who sat in the Supreme +Court as a judge with the title of Lord Coalstoun. The party had been +convivial, as we know parties of the highest legal characters often +were in those days. When breaking up and going to the drawing-room, one +of them, not seeing his way very clearly, stepped out of the dining-room +window, which was open to the summer air. The ground at Coalstoun +sloping off from the house behind, the worthy judge got a great fall, +and rolled down the bank. He contrived, however, as tipsy men generally +do, to regain his legs, and was able to reach the drawing-room. The +first remark he made was an innocent remonstrance with his friend the +host, "Od, Charlie Brown, what gars ye hae sic lang steps to your +_front_ door?" + +On Deeside, where many original stories had their origin, I recollect +hearing several of an excellent and worthy, but very simple-minded man, +the Laird of Craigmyle. On one occasion, when the beautiful and clever +Jane, Duchess of Gordon, was scouring through the country, intent upon +some of those electioneering schemes which often occupied her fertile +imagination and active energies, she came to call at Craigmyle, and +having heard that the laird was making bricks on the property, for the +purpose of building a new garden wall, with her usual tact she opened +the subject, and kindly asked, "Well, Mr. Gordon, and how do your bricks +come on?" Good Craigmyle's thoughts were much occupied with a new +leather portion of his dress, which had been lately constructed, so, +looking down on his nether garments, he said in pure Aberdeen dialect, +"Muckle obleeged to yer Grace, the breeks war sum ticht at first, but +they are deeing weel eneuch noo." + +The last Laird of Macnab, before the clan finally broke up and emigrated +to Canada, was a well-known character in the country, and being poor, +used to ride about on a most wretched horse, which gave occasion to +many jibes at his expense. The laird was in the constant habit of riding +up from the country to attend the Musselburgh races. A young wit, by way +of playing him off on the race-course, asked him, in a contemptuous +tone, "Is that the same horse you had last year, laird?" "Na," said the +laird, brandishing his whip in the interrogator's face in so emphatic a +manner as to preclude further questioning, "na; but it's the same +_whup_." In those days, as might be expected, people were not nice in +expressions of their dislike of persons and measures. If there be not +more charity in society than of old, there is certainly more courtesy. I +have, from a friend, an anecdote illustrative of this remark, in regard +to feelings exercised towards an unpopular laird. In the neighbourhood +of Banff, in Forfarshire, the seat of a very ancient branch of the +Ramsays, lived a proprietor who bore the appellation of Corb, from the +name of his estate. This family has passed away, and its property merged +in Banff. The laird was intensely disliked in the neighbourhood. Sir +George Ramsay was, on the other hand, universally popular and respected. +On one occasion, Sir George, in passing a morass in his own +neighbourhood, had missed the road and fallen into a bog to an alarming +depth. To his great relief, he saw a passenger coming along the path, +which was at no great distance. He called loudly for his help, but the +man took no notice. Poor Sir George felt himself sinking, and redoubled +his cries for assistance; all at once the passenger rushed forward, +carefully extricated him from his perilous position, and politely +apologised for his first neglect of his appeal, adding, as his reason, +"Indeed, Sir George, I thought it was Corb!" evidently meaning that +_had_ it been Corb, he must have taken his chance for him. + +In Lanarkshire there lived a sma' sma' laird named Hamilton, who was +noted for his eccentricity. On one occasion, a neighbour waited on him, +and requested his name as an accommodation to a "bit bill" for twenty +pounds at three months' date, which led to the following characteristic +and truly Scottish colloquy:--"Na, na, I canna do that." "What for no, +laird? ye hae dune the same thing for ithers." "Ay, ay, Tammas, but +there's wheels within wheels ye ken naething about; I canna do't." "It's +a sma' affair to refuse me, laird." "Weel, ye see, Tammas, if I was to +pit my name till't, ye wad get the siller frae the bank, and when the +time came round, ye wadna be ready, and I wad hae to pay't; sae then you +and me wad quarrel; sae we may just as weel quarrel _the noo_, as lang's +the siller's in ma pouch." On one occasion, Hamilton having business +with the late Duke of Hamilton at Hamilton Palace, the Duke politely +asked him to lunch. A liveried servant waited upon them, and was most +assiduous in his attentions to the Duke and his guest. At last our +eccentric friend lost patience, and looking at the servant, addressed +him thus, "What the deil for are ye dance, dancing, about the room that +gait? can ye no draw in your chair and sit down? I'm sure there's +_plenty on the table for three_." + +As a specimen of the old-fashioned Laird, now become a Reminiscence, who +adhered pertinaciously to old Scottish usages, and to the old Scottish +dialect, I cannot, I am sure, adduce a better specimen than Mr. +Fergusson of Pitfour, to whose servant I have already referred. He was +always called Pitfour, from the name of his property in Aberdeenshire. +He must have died fifty years ago. He was for many years M.P. for the +county of Aberdeen, and I have reason to believe that he made the +enlightened parliamentary declaration which has been given to others: He +said "he had often heard speeches in the _House_, which had changed his +opinion, but none that had ever changed his vote." I recollect hearing +of his dining in London sixty years ago, at the house of a Scottish +friend, where there was a swell party, and Pitfour was introduced as a +great northern proprietor, and county M.P. A fashionable lady patronised +him graciously, and took great charge of him, and asked him about his +estates. Pitfour was very dry and sparing in his communications, as for +example, "What does your home farm chiefly produce, Mr. Fergusson?" +Answer, "Girss." "I beg your pardon, Mr. Fergusson, what does your home +farm produce?" All she could extract was, "Girss." + +Of another laird, whom I heard often spoken of in old times, an anecdote +was told strongly Scottish. Our friend had much difficulty (as many +worthy lairds have had) in meeting the claims of those two woeful +periods of the year called with us in Scotland the "tarmes." He had been +employing for some time as workman a stranger from the south on some +house repairs, of the not uncommon name in England of Christmas. His +servant early one morning called out at the laird's door in great +excitement that "Christmas had run away, and nobody knew where he had +gone." He coolly turned in his bed with the ejaculation, "I only wish he +had taken Whitsunday and Martinmas along with him." I do not know a +better illustration of quiet, shrewd, and acute Scottish humour than the +following little story, which an esteemed correspondent mentions having +heard from his father when a boy, relating to a former Duke of Athole, +who had _no family of his own_, and whom he mentions as having +remembered very well:--He met, one morning, one of his cottars or +gardeners, whose wife he knew to be in the _hopeful way_. Asking him +"how Marget was the day," the man replied that she had that morning +given him twins. Upon which the Duke said,--"Weel, Donald; ye ken the +Almighty never sends bairns without the meat." "That may be, your +Grace," said Donald; "but whiles I think that Providence maks a mistak +in thae matters, and sends the bairns to ae hoose and the meat to +anither!" The Duke took the hint, and sent him a cow with calf the +following morning. + +I have heard of an amusing scene between a laird, noted for his +meanness, and a wandering sort of Edie Ochiltree, a well-known itinerant +who lived by his wits and what he could pick up in his rounds amongst +the houses through the country. The laird, having seen the beggar sit +down near his gate to examine the contents of his pock or wallet, +conjectured that he had come from his house, and so drew near to see +what he had carried off. As the laird was keenly investigating the +mendicant's spoils, his quick eye detected some bones on which there +remained more meat than should have been allowed to leave his kitchen. +Accordingly he pounced upon the bones, declaring he had been robbed, and +insisted on the beggar returning to the house and giving back the spoil. +He was, however, prepared for the attack, and sturdily defended his +property, boldly asserting, "Na, na, laird, thae are no Tod-brae banes; +they are Inch-byre banes, and nane o' your honour's"--meaning that he +had received these bones at the house of a neighbour of a more liberal +character. The beggar's professional discrimination between the merits +of the bones of the two mansions, and his pertinacious defence of his +own property, would have been most amusing to a bystander. + +I have, however, a reverse story, in which the beggar is quietly +silenced by the proprietor. A noble lord, some generations back, well +known for his frugal habits, had just picked up a small copper coin in +his own avenue, and had been observed by one of the itinerating +mendicant race, who, grudging the transfer of the piece into the peer's +pocket, exclaimed, "O, gie't to me, my lord;" to which the quiet answer +was, "Na, na; fin' a fardin' for yersell, puir body." + +There are always pointed anecdotes against houses wanting in a liberal +and hospitable expenditure in Scotland. Thus, we have heard of a master +leaving such a mansion, and taxing his servant with being drunk, which +he had too often been after other country visits. On this occasion, +however, he was innocent of the charge, for he had not the _opportunity_ +to transgress. So, when his master asserted, "Jemmy, you are drunk!" +Jemmy very quietly answered, "Indeed, sir, I wish I wur." At another +mansion, notorious for scanty fare, a gentleman was inquiring of the +gardener about a dog which some time ago he had given to the laird. The +gardener showed him a lank greyhound, on which the gentleman said, "No, +no; the dog I gave your master was a mastiff, not a greyhound;" to which +the gardener quietly answered, "Indeed, ony dog micht sune become a +greyhound by stopping here." + +From a friend and relative, a minister of the Established Church of +Scotland, I used to hear many characteristic stories. He had a curious +vein of this sort of humour in himself, besides what he brought out from +others. One of his peculiarities was a mortal antipathy to the whole +French nation, whom he frequently abused in no measured terms. At the +same time he had great relish of a glass of claret, which he considered +the prince of all social beverages. So he usually finished off his +antigallican tirades, with the reservation, "But the bodies brew the +braw drink." He lived amongst his own people, and knew well the habits +and peculiarities of a race gone by. He had many stories connected with +the pastoral relation between minister and people, and all such stories +are curious, not merely for their amusement, but from the illustration +they afford us of that peculiar Scottish humour which we are now +describing. He had himself, when a very young boy, before he came up to +the Edinburgh High School, been at the parochial school where he +resided, and which, like many others, at that period, had a considerable +reputation for the skill and scholarship of the master. He used to +describe school scenes rather different, I suspect, from school scenes +in our day. One boy, on coming late, explained that the cause had been a +regular pitched battle between his parents, with the details of which he +amused his school-fellows; and he described the battle in vivid and +Scottish Homeric terms: "And eh, as they faucht, and they faucht," +adding, however, with much complacency, "but my minnie dang, she +did tho'." + +There was a style of conversation and quaint modes of expression between +ministers and their people at that time, which, I suppose, would seem +strange to the present generation; as, for example, I recollect a +conversation between this relative and one of his parishioners of this +description.--It had been a very wet and unpromising autumn. The +minister met a certain Janet of his flock, and accosted her very kindly. +He remarked, "Bad prospect for the har'st (harvest), Janet, this wet." +_Janet_--"Indeed, sir, I've seen as muckle as that there'll be nae +har'st the year." _Minister_--"Na, Janet, deil as muckle as that't +ever you saw." + +As I have said, he was a clergyman of the Established Church, and had +many stories about ministers and people, arising out of his own pastoral +experience, or the experience of friends and neighbours. He was much +delighted with the not very refined rebuke which one of his own farmers +had given to a young minister who had for some Sundays occupied his +pulpit. The young man had dined with the farmer in the afternoon when +services were over, and his appetite was so sharp, that he thought it +necessary to apologise to his host for eating so substantial a +dinner.--"You see," he said, "I am always very hungry after preaching." +The old gentleman, not much admiring the youth's pulpit ministrations, +having heard this apology two or three times, at last replied +sarcastically, "Indeed, sir, I'm no surprised at it, considering the +_trash_ that comes aff your stamach in the morning." + +What I wish to keep in view is, to distinguish anecdotes which are +amusing on account merely of the expressions used, from those which have +real wit and humour _combined_, with the purely Scottish vehicle in +which they are conveyed. + +Of this class I could not have a better specimen to commence with than +the defence of the liturgy of his church, by John Skinner of Langside, +of whom previous mention has been made. It is witty and clever. + +Being present at a party (I think at Lord Forbes's), where were also +several ministers of the Establishment, the conversation over their wine +turned, among other things, on the Prayer Book. Skinner took no part in +it, till one minister remarked to him, "The great faut I hae to your +prayer-book is that ye use the Lord's Prayer sae aften,--ye juist mak a +dishclout o't." Skinner's rejoinder was, "Verra true! Ay, man, we mak a +dishclout o't, an' we wring't, an' we wring't, an' we wring't, an' the +bree[163] o't washes a' the lave o' our prayers." + +No one, I think, could deny the wit of the two following rejoinders. + +A ruling elder of a country parish in the west of Scotland was well +known in the district as a shrewd and ready-witted man. He received many +a visit from persons who liked a banter, or to hear a good joke. Three +young students gave him a call in order to have a little amusement at +the elder's expense. On approaching him, one of them saluted him, "Well, +Father Abraham, how are you to-day?" "You are wrong," said the other, +"this is old Father Isaac." "Tuts," said the third, "you are both +mistaken; this is old Father Jacob." David looked at the young men, and +in his own way replied, "I am neither old Father Abraham, nor old Father +Isaac, nor old Father Jacob; but I am Saul the son of Kish, seeking his +father's asses, and lo! I've found three o' them." + +For many years the Baptist community of Dunfermline was presided over by +brothers David Dewar and James Inglis, the latter of whom has just +recently gone to his reward. Brother David was a plain, honest, +straightforward man, who never hesitated to express his convictions, +however unpalatable they might be to others. Being elected a member of +the Prison Board, he was called upon to give his vote in the choice of a +chaplain from the licentiates of the Established Kirk. The party who had +gained the confidence of the Board had proved rather an indifferent +preacher in a charge to which he had previously been appointed; and on +David being asked to signify his assent to the choice of the Board, he +said, "Weel, I've no objections to the man, for I understand he has +preached a kirk toom (empty) already, and if he be as successful in the +jail, he'll maybe preach it vawcant as weel." + +From Mr. Inglis, clerk of the Court of Session, I have the following +Scottish rejoinder:-- + +"I recollect my father relating a conversation between a Perthshire +laird and one of his tenants. The laird's eldest son was rather a +simpleton. Laird says, 'I am going to send the young laird abroad,' +'What for?' asks the tenant; answered, 'To see the world;' tenant +replies, 'But, lord-sake, laird, will no the world see _him_?'" + +An admirably humorous reply is recorded of a Scotch officer, well known +and esteemed in his day for mirth and humour. Captain Innes of the +Guards (usually called Jock Innes by his contemporaries) was with others +getting ready for Flushing or some of those expeditions of the beginning +of the great war. His commanding officer (Lord Huntly, my correspondent +thinks) remonstrated about the badness of his hat, and recommended a new +one--"Na, na! bide a wee," said Jock; "where we're gain' faith there'll +soon be mair hats nor _heads_." + +I recollect being much amused with a Scottish reference of this kind in +the heart of London. Many years ago a Scotch party had dined at +Simpson's famous beef-steak house in the Strand. On coming away some of +the party could not find their hats, and my uncle was jocularly asking +the waiter, whom he knew to be a _Deeside_ man, "Whar are our bonnets, +Jeems?" To which he replied, "'Deed, I mind the day when I had neither +hat nor bonnet." + +There is an odd and original way of putting a matter sometimes in Scotch +people, which is irresistibly comic, although by the persons nothing +comic is intended; as for example, when in 1786 Edinburgh was +illuminated on account of the recovery of George III. from severe +illness. In a house where great preparation was going on for the +occasion, by getting the candles fixed in tin sconces, an old nurse of +the family, looking on, exclaimed, "Ay, it's a braw time for the +cannel-makers when the king is sick, honest man!" + +Scottish farmers of the old school were a shrewd and humorous race, +sometimes not indisposed to look with a little jealousy upon their +younger brethren, who, on their part, perhaps, showed their contempt for +the old-fashioned ways. I take the following example from the columns of +the _Peterhead Sentinel_, just as it appeared--June 14, 1861:-- + +"AN ANECDOTE FOR DEAN EAMSAY.--The following characteristic and amusing +anecdote was communicated to us the other day by a gentleman who +happened to be a party to the conversation detailed below. This +gentleman was passing along a road not a hundred miles from Peterhead +one day this week. Two different farms skirt the separate sides of the +turnpike, one of which is rented by a farmer who cultivates his land +according to the most advanced system of agriculture, and the other of +which is farmed by a gentleman of the old school. Our informant met the +latter worthy at the side of the turnpike opposite his neighbour's farm, +and seeing a fine crop of wheat upon what appeared to be [and really +was] very thin and poor land, asked, 'When was that wheat sown?' 'O I +dinna ken,' replied the gentleman of the old school, with a sort of +half-indifference, half-contempt. 'But isn't it strange that such a fine +crop should be reared on such bad land?' asked our informant. 'O, +na--nae at a'--deevil thank it; a gravesteen wad gie guid bree[164] gin +ye gied it plenty o' butter!'" + +But perhaps the best anecdote illustrative of the keen shrewdness of the +Scottish farmer is related by Mr. Boyd[165] in one of his charming +series of papers, reprinted from _Fraser's Magazine_. "A friend of mine, +a country parson, on first going to his parish, resolved to farm his +glebe for himself. A neighbouring farmer kindly offered the parson to +plough one of his fields. The farmer said that he would send his man +John with a plough and a pair of horses on a certain day. 'If ye're +goin' about,' said the farmer to the clergyman, 'John will be unco weel +pleased if you speak to him, and say it's a fine day, or the like o' +that; but dinna,' said the farmer, with much solemnity, 'dinna say +onything to him about ploughin' and sawin'; for John,' he added, 'is a +stupid body, but he has been ploughin' and sawin' a' his life, and he'll +see in a minute that _ye_ ken naething aboot ploughin' and sawin'. And +then,' said the sagacious old farmer, with much earnestness, 'if he +comes to think that ye ken naething aboot ploughin' and sawin', he'll +think that ye ken naething aboot onything!'" + +The following is rather an original commentary, by a layman, upon +clerical incomes:--A relative of mine going to church with a Forfarshire +farmer, one of the old school, asked him the amount of the minister's +stipend. He said, "Od, it's a gude ane--the maist part of L300 a year." +"Well," said my relative, "many of these Scotch ministers are but poorly +off." "They've eneuch, sir, they've eneuch; if they'd mair, it would +want a' their time to the spendin' o't." + +Scotch gamekeepers had often much dry quiet humour. I was much amused by +the answer of one of those under the following circumstances:--An +Ayrshire gentleman, who was from the first a very bad shot, or rather no +shot at all, when out on 1st of September, having failed, time after +time, in bringing down a single bird, had at last pointed out to him by +his attendant bag-carrier a large covey, thick and close on the +stubbles. "Noo, Mr. Jeems, let drive at them, just as they are!" Mr. +Jeems did let drive, as advised, but not a feather remained to testify +the shot. All flew off, safe and sound--"Hech, sir (remarks his friend), +but ye've made thae yins _shift their quarters_." + +The two following anecdotes of rejoinders from Scottish guidwives, and +for which I am indebted, as for many other kind communications, to the +Rev. Mr. Blair of Dunblane, appear to me as good examples of the +peculiar Scottish pithy phraseology which we refer to, as any that I +have met with. + +An old lady from whom the "Great Unknown" had derived many an ancient +tale, was waited upon one day by the author of "Waverley." On his +endeavouring to give the authorship the go-by, the old dame protested, +"D'ye think, sir, I dinna ken my ain groats in ither folk's kail[166]?" + +A conceited packman called at a farm-house in the west of Scotland, in +order to dispose of some of his wares. The goodwife was offended by his +southern accent, and his high talk about York, London, and other big +places. "An' whaur come ye frae yersell?" was the question of the +guidwife. "Ou, I am from the Border." "The Border--oh! I thocht that; +for we aye think the _selvidge_ is the wakest bit o' the wab!" + +The following is a good specimen of ready Scotch humorous reply, by a +master to his discontented workman, and in which he turned the tables +upon him, in his reference to Scripture. In a town of one of the central +counties a Mr. J---- carried on, about a century ago, a very extensive +business in the linen manufacture. Although _strikes_ were then unknown +among the labouring classes, the spirit from which these take their rise +has no doubt at all times existed. Among Mr. J----'s many workmen, one +had given him constant annoyance for years, from his discontented and +argumentative spirit. Insisting one day on getting something or other +which his master thought most unreasonable, and refused to give in to, +he at last submitted, with a bad grace, saying, "You're nae better than +_Pharaoh_, sir, forcin' puir folk to mak' bricks without straw." "Well, +Saunders," quietly rejoined his master, "if I'm nae better than Pharaoh +in one respect, I'll be better in another, for _I'll no hinder ye going +to the wilderness whenever you choose_." + +Persons who are curious in Scottish stories of wit and humour speak much +of the sayings of a certain "Laird of Logan," who was a well-known +character in the West of Scotland. This same Laird of Logan was at a +meeting of the heritors of Cumnock, where a proposal was made to erect a +new churchyard wall. He met the proposition with the dry remark, "I +never big dykes till the _tenants_ complain." Calling one day for a gill +of whisky in a public-house, the Laird was asked if he would take any +water with the spirit. "Na, na," replied he, "I would rather ye would +tak the water out o't." + +The laird sold a horse to an Englishman, saying, "You buy him as you +see him; but he's an _honest_ beast." The purchaser took him home. In a +few days he stumbled and fell, to the damage of his own knees and his +rider's head. On this the angry purchaser remonstrated with the laird, +whose reply was, "Well, sir, I told ye he was an honest beast; many a +time has he threatened to come down with me, and I kenned he would keep +his word some day." + +At the time of the threatened invasion, the laird had been taunted at a +meeting at Ayr with want of loyal spirit at Cumnock, as at that place no +volunteer corps had been raised to meet the coming danger; Cumnock, it +should be recollected, being on a high situation, and ten or twelve +miles from the coast. "What sort of people are you up at Cumnock?" said +an Ayr gentleman; "you have not a single volunteer!" "Never you heed," +says Logan, very quietly; "if the French land at Ayr, there will soon be +plenty of volunteers up at Cumnock." + +A pendant to the story of candid admission on the part of the minister, +that the people might be _weary_ after his sermon, has been given on the +authority of the narrator, a Fife gentleman, ninety years of age when he +told it. He had been to church at Elie, and listening to a young and +perhaps bombastic preacher, who happened to be officiating for the Rev. +Dr. Milligan, who was in church. After service, meeting the Doctor in +the passage, he introduced the young clergyman, who, on being asked by +the old man how he did, elevated his shirt collar, and complained of +fatigue, and being very much "_tired_." "Tired, did ye say, my man?" +said the old satirist, who was slightly deaf; "Lord, man! if you're +_half_ as tired as I am, I pity ye!" + +I have been much pleased with an offering from Carluke, containing two +very pithy anecdotes. Mr. Rankin very kindly writes:--"Your +'Reminiscences' are most refreshing. I am very little of a +story-collector, but I have recorded some of an old schoolmaster, who +was a story-teller. As a sort of payment for the amusement I have +derived from your book, I shall give one or two." + +He sends the two following:-- + +"Shortly after Mr. Kay had been inducted schoolmaster of Carluke (1790), +the bederal called at the school, verbally announcing, +proclamation-ways, that Mrs. So-and-So's funeral would be on Fuirsday. +'At what hour?' asked the dominie. 'Ou, ony time atween ten and twa.' At +two o'clock of the day fixed, Mr. Kay--quite a stranger to the customs +of the district--arrived at the place, and was astonished to find a +crowd of men and lads, standing here and there, some smoking, and all +_arglebargling_[167] as if at the end of a fair. He was instantly, but +mysteriously, approached, and touched on the arm by a red-faced +bareheaded man, who seemed to be in authority, and was beckoned to +follow. On entering the barn, which was seated all round, he found +numbers sitting, each with the head bent down, and each with his hat +between his knees--all gravity and silence. Anon a voice was heard +issuing from the far end, and a long prayer was uttered. They had worked +at this--what was called '_a service_'--during three previous hours, one +party succeeding another, and many taking advantage of every service, +which consisted of a prayer by way of grace, a glass of _white_ wine, a +glass of _red_ wine, a glass of _rum_, and a prayer by way of +thanksgiving. After the long invocation, bread and wine passed round. +Silence prevailed. Most partook of both _rounds_ of wine, but when the +rum came, many nodded refusal, and by and by the nodding seemed to be +universal, and the trays passed on so much the more quickly. A sumphish +weather-beaten man, with a large flat blue bonnet on his knee, who had +nodded unwittingly, and was about to lose the last chance of a glass of +rum, raised his head, saying, amid the deep silence, 'Od, I daursay I +_wull_ tak anither glass,' and in a sort of vengeful, yet apologetic +tone, added, 'The auld jaud yince cheated me wi' a cauve' (calf)." + +At a farmer's funeral in the country, an undertaker was in charge of the +ceremonial, and directing how it was to proceed, when he noticed a +little man giving orders, and, as he thought, rather encroaching upon +the duties and privileges of his own office. He asked him, "And wha are +ye, mi' man, that tak sae muckle on ye?" "Oh, dinna ye ken?" said the +man, under a strong sense of his own importance, "I'm the corp's +brither[168]?" + +Curious scenes took place at funerals where there was, in times gone by, +an unfortunate tendency to join with such solemnities more attention to +festal entertainment than was becoming. A farmer, at the interment of +his second wife, exercised a liberal hospitality to his friends at the +inn near the church. On looking over the bill, the master defended the +charge as moderate. But he reminded him, "Ye forget, man, that it's no +ilka ane that brings a _second_ funeral to your house." + +"Dr. Scott, minister of Carluke (1770), was a fine graceful kindly man, +always stepping about in his bag-wig and cane in hand, with a kind and +ready word to every one. He was officiating at a bridal in his parish, +where there was a goodly company, had partaken of the good cheer, and +waited till the young people were fairly warmed in the dance. A +dissenting body had sprung up in the parish, which he tried to think was +beneath him even to notice, when he could help it, yet never seemed to +feel at all keenly when the dissenters were alluded to. One of the chief +leaders of this body was at the bridal, and felt it to be his bounden +duty to call upon the minister for his reasons for sanctioning by his +presence so sinful an enjoyment. 'Weel, minister, what think ye o' this +dancin'?' 'Why, John,' said the minister, blithely, 'I think it an +excellent exercise for young people, and, I dare say, so do you.' 'Ah, +sir, I'm no sure about it; I see nae authority for't in the Scriptures.' +'Umph, indeed, John; you cannot forget David.' 'Ah, sir, Dauvid; gif +they were a' to dance as Dauvid did, it would be a different thing +a'thegither.' 'Hoot-o-fie, hoot-o-fie, John; would you have the young +folk strip to the sark?'" + +Reference has been made to the eccentric laird of Balnamoon, his wig, +and his "speats o' drinking and praying." A story of this laird is +recorded, which I do think is well named, by a correspondent who +communicates it, as a "quintessential phasis of dry Scotch humour," and +the explanation of which would perhaps be thrown away upon any one who +_needed_ the explanation. The story is this:--The laird riding past a +high steep bank, stopped opposite a hole in it, and said, "Hairy, I saw +a brock gang in there." "Did ye?" said Hairy; "wull ye hand my horse, +sir?" "Certainly," said the laird, and away rushed Hairy for a spade. +After digging for half-an-hour, he came back, quite done, to the laird, +who had regarded him musingly. "I canna find him, sir," said Hairy. +"'Deed," said the laird, very coolly, "I wad ha' wondered if ye had, for +it's ten years sin' I saw him gang in there." + +Amongst many humorous colloquies between Balnamoon and his servant, the +following must have been very racy and very original. The laird, +accompanied by Hairy, after a dinner party, was riding on his way home, +through a ford, when he fell off into the water. "Whae's that faun?" he +inquired. "'Deed," quoth Hairy, "I witna an it be na your honour." + +There is a peculiarity connected with what we have considered Scotch +humour. It is more common for Scotsmen to associate their own feelings +with _national_ events and national history than for Englishmen. Take as +illustrations the following, as being perhaps as good as any:--The Rev. +Robert Scott, a Scotsman who forgets not Scotland in his southern +vicarage, and whom I have named before as having sent me some good +reminiscences, tells me that, at Inverary, some thirty years ago, he +could not help overhearing the conversation of some Lowland +cattle-dealers in the public room in which he was. The subject of the +bravery of our navy being started, one of the interlocutors expressed +his surprise that Nelson should have issued his signal at Trafalgar in +the terms, "_England expects_," etc. He was met with the answer (which +seemed highly satisfactory to the rest), "Ah, Nelson only said +'_expects_' of the English; he said naething of Scotland, for he _kent_ +the _Scotch_ would do theirs." + +I am assured the following manifestation of national feeling against the +memory of a Scottish character actually took place within a few +years:--Williamson (the Duke of Buccleuch's huntsman) was one afternoon +riding home from hunting through Haddington; and as he passed the old +Abbey, he saw an ancient woman looking through the iron grating in front +of the burial-place of the Lauderdale family, holding by the bars, and +grinning and dancing with rage. "Eh, gudewife," said Williamson, "what +ails ye?" "It's the Duke o' Lauderdale," cried she. "Eh, if I could win +at him, I wud rax the banes o' him." + +To this class belongs the following complacent Scottish remark upon +Bannockburn. A splenetic Englishman said to a Scottish countryman, +something of a wag, that no man of taste would think of remaining any +time in such a country as Scotland. To which the canny Scot replied, +"Tastes differ; I'se tak ye to a place no far frae Stirling, whaur +thretty thousand o' your countrymen ha' been for five hunder years, and +they've nae thocht o' leavin' yet." + +In a similar spirit, an honest Scotch farmer, who had sent some sheep to +compete at a great English agricultural cattle-show, and was much +disgusted at not getting a prize, consoled himself for the +disappointment, by insinuating that the judges could hardly act quite +impartially by a Scottish competitor, complacently remarking, "It's aye +been the same since Bannockburn." + +Then, again, take the story told in Lockhart's Life of Sir Walter Scott, +of the blacksmith whom Sir Walter had formerly known as a horse-doctor, +and whom he found at a small country town south of the Border, +practising medicine with a reckless use of "laudamy and calomy[169]," +apologising at the same time for the mischief he might do, by the +assurance that it "_would be lang before it made up for Flodden_." How +graphically it describes the interest felt by Scotchmen of his rank in +the incidents of their national history. A similar example has been +recorded in connection with Bannockburn. Two Englishmen visited the +field of that great battle, and a country blacksmith pointed out the +positions of the two armies, the stone on which was fixed the Bruce's +standard, etc. The gentlemen, pleased with the intelligence of their +guide, on leaving pressed his acceptance of a crown-piece. "Na, na," +replied the Scotsman, with much pride, "it has cost ye eneuch already." +Such an example of self-denial on the part of a Scottish cicerone is, we +fear, now rather a "reminiscence." + +A north country drover had, however, a more _tangible_ opportunity of +gratifying his national animosity against the Southron, and of which he +availed himself. Returning homewards, after a somewhat unsuccessful +journey, and not in very good humour with the Englishers, when passing +through Carlisle he saw a notice stuck up, offering a reward of L50 for +any one who would do a piece of service to the community, by officiating +as executioner of the law on a noted criminal then under sentence of +death. Seeing a chance to make up for his bad market, and comforted with +the assurance that he was unknown there, he undertook the office, +executed the condemned, and got the fee. When moving off with the money, +he was twitted at as a "mean beggarly Scot," doing for money what no +_Englishman_ would. With a grin and quiet glee, he only replied, "I'll +hang ye a' at the price." + +Some Scotsmen, no doubt, have a very complacent feeling regarding the +superiority of their countrymen, and make no hesitation in proclaiming +their opinion. I have always admired the quaint expression of such +belief in a case which has recently been reported to me. A young +Englishman had taken a Scottish shooting-ground, and enjoyed his +mountain sport so much as to imbibe a strong partiality for his northern +residence and all its accompaniments. At a German watering-place he +encountered, next year, an original character, a Scotsman of the old +school, very national, and somewhat bigoted in his nationality: he +determined to pass himself off to him as a genuine Scottish native; and, +accordingly, he talked of Scotland and haggis, and sheep's head, and +whisky; he boasted of Bannockburn, and admired Queen Mary; looked upon +Scott and Burns as superior to all English writers; and staggered, +although he did not convince, the old gentleman. On going away he took +leave of his Scottish friend, and said, "Well, sir, next time we meet, I +hope you will receive me as a real countryman." "Weel," he said, "I'm +jest thinkin', my lad, ye're nae Scotsman; but I'll tell ye what ye +are--ye're juist an _impruived_ Englishman." + +I am afraid we must allow that Scottish people have a _leetle_ national +vanity, and may be too ready sometimes to press the claim of their +country to an extravagantly assumed pre-eminence in the annals of genius +and celebrities. An extreme case of such pretension I heard of lately, +which is amusing. A Scotsman, in reference to the distinction awarded to +Sir Walter Scott, on occasion of his centenary, had roundly asserted, +"But _all_ who have been eminent men were Scotsmen." An Englishman, +offended at such assumption of national pre-eminence, asked indignantly, +"What do you say to Shakspeare?" To which the other quietly replied, +"Weel, his tawlent wad justifee the inference." This is rich, as an +example of an _a priori_ argument in favour of a man being a Scotsman. + +We find in the conversation of old people frequent mention of a class +of beings well known in country parishes, now either become commonplace, +like the rest of the world, or removed altogether, and shut up in +poorhouses or madhouses--I mean the individuals frequently called +parochial _idiots_; but who were rather of the order of naturals. They +were eccentric, or somewhat crazy, useless, idle creatures, who used to +wander about from house to house, and sometimes made very shrewd +sarcastic remarks upon what was going on in the parish. I heard such a +person once described as one who was "wanting in twopence of change for +a shilling." They used to take great liberty of speech regarding the +conduct and disposition of those with whom they came in contact, and +many odd sayings which emanated from them were traditionary in country +localities. I have a kindly feeling towards these imperfectly +intelligent, but often perfectly cunning beings; partly, I believe, from +recollections of early associations in boyish days with some of those +Davy Gellatleys. I have therefore preserved several anecdotes with which +I have been favoured, where their odd sayings and indications of a +degree of mental activity have been recorded. These persons seem to have +had a partiality for getting near the pulpit in church, and their +presence there was accordingly sometimes annoying to the preacher and +the congregation; as at Maybole, when Dr. Paul, now of St. Cuthbert's, +was minister in 1823, John M'Lymont, an individual of this class, had +been in the habit of standing so close to the pulpit door as to overlook +the Bible and pulpit board. When required, however, by the clergyman to +keep at a greater distance, and not _look in upon the minister_, he got +intensely angry and violent. He threatened the minister,--"Sir, baeby +(maybe) I'll come farther;" meaning to intimate that perhaps he would, +if much provoked, come into the pulpit altogether. This, indeed, +actually took place on another occasion, and the tenure of the +ministerial position was justified by an argument of a most amusing +nature. The circumstance, I am assured, happened in a parish in the +north. The clergyman, on coming into church, found the pulpit occupied +by the parish natural. The authorities had been unable to remove him +without more violence than was seemly, and therefore waited for the +minister to dispossess Tam of the place he had assumed. "Come down, sir, +immediately!" was the peremptory and indignant call; and on Tam being +unmoved, it was repeated with still greater energy. Tam, however, +replied, looking down confidentially from his elevation, "Na, na, +minister! juist ye come up wi' me. This is a perverse generation, and +faith they need us baith." It is curious to mark the sort of glimmering +of sense, and even of discriminating thought, displayed by persons of +this class. As an example, take a conversation held by this same John +M'Lymont, with Dr. Paul, whom he met some time after. He seemed to have +recovered his good humour, as he stopped him and said, "Sir, I would +like to speer a question at ye on a subject that's troubling me." "Well, +Johnnie, what is the question?" To which he replied, "Sir, is it lawful +at ony time to tell a lee?" The minister desired to know what Johnnie +himself thought upon the point. "Weel, sir," said he, "I'll no say but +in every case it's wrang to tell a lee; but," added he, looking archly +and giving a knowing wink, "I think there are _waur lees than ithers_" +"How, Johnnie?" and then he instantly replied, with all the simplicity +of a fool, "_To keep down a din, for instance_. I'll no say but a man +does wrang in telling a lee to keep down a din, but I'm sure he does not +do half sae muckle wrang as a man who tells a lee to kick up a +deevilment o' a din." This opened a question not likely to occur to such +a mind. Mr. Asher, minister of Inveraven, in Morayshire, narrated to Dr. +Paul a curious example of want of intelligence combined with a power of +cunning to redress a fancied wrong, shown by a poor natural of the +parish, who had been seized with a violent inflammatory attack, and was +in great danger. The medical attendant saw it necessary to bleed him, +but he resisted, and would not submit to it. At last the case became so +hopeless that they were obliged to use force, and, holding his hands and +feet, the doctor opened a vein and drew blood, upon which the poor +creature, struggling violently, bawled out, "O doctor, doctor! you'll +kill me! you'll kill me! and depend upon it the first thing I'll do when +I get to the other world will be to _report you to the board of +Supervision there, and get you dismissed_." A most extraordinary +sensation was once produced on a congregation by Rab Hamilton, a +well-remembered crazy creature of the west country, on the occasion of +his attendance at the parish kirk of "Auld Ayr, wham ne'er a toun +surpasses," the minister of which, in the opinion of Rab's own minister, +Mr. Peebles, had a tendency to Socinian doctrines. Miss Kirkwood, +Bothwell, relates the story from the recollection of her aunt, who was +present. Rab had put his head between some iron rails, the first +intimation of which to the congregation was a stentorian voice crying +out, "Murder! my heed'll hae to be cuttit aff! Holy minister! +congregation! Oh, my heed maun be cuttit aff. It's a judgment for +leaving my godlie Mr. Peebles at the Newton." After he had been +extricated and quieted, when asked why he put his head there, he said, +"It was juist to look on[170] wi' _anither woman_." + +The following anecdote of this same Rab Hamilton from a kind +correspondent at Ayr sanctions the opinion that he must have +occasionally said such clever things as made some think him more rogue +than fool. Dr. Auld often showed him kindness, but being once addressed +by him when in a hurry and out of humour, he said, "Get away, Rab; I +have nothing for you to day." "Whaw, whew," cried Rab, in a half howl, +half whining tone, "I dinna want onything the day, Maister Auld; I +wanted to tell you an awsome dream I hae had. I dreamt I was deed." +"Weel, what then?" said Dr. Auld. "Ou, I was carried far, far, and up, +up, up, till I cam to heeven's yett, where I chappit, and chappit, and +chappit, till at last an angel keekit out, and said 'Wha are ye?' 'A'm +puir Rab Hamilton.' 'Whaur are ye frae?' 'Frae the wicked toun o' Ayr.' +'I dinna ken ony sic place,' said the angel. 'Oh, but A'm juist frae +there,' Weel, the angel sends for the Apostle Peter, and Peter comes wi' +his key and opens the yett, and says to me, 'Honest man, do you come +frae the auld toun o' Ayr?' 'Deed do I,' says I. 'Weel,' says Peter, 'I +ken the place, but naebody's cam frae the toun o' Ayr, no since the +year'" so and so--mentioning the year when Dr. Auld was inducted into +the parish. Dr. Auld could not resist giving him his answer, and telling +him to go about his business. + +The pathetic complaint of one of this class, residing at a farm-house, +has often been narrated, and forms a good illustration of idiot life and +feelings. He was living in the greatest comfort, and every want +provided. But, like the rest of mankind, he had his own trials, and his +own cause for anxiety and annoyance. In this poor fellow's case it was +the _great turkey-cock_ at the farm, of which he stood so terribly in +awe that he was afraid to come within a great distance of his enemy. +Some of his friends, coming to visit him, reminded him how comfortable +he was, and how grateful he ought to be for the great care taken of him. +He admitted the truth of the remark generally, but still, like others, +he had his unknown grief which sorely beset his path in life. There was +a secret grievance which embittered his lot; and to his friend he thus +opened his heart:--"Ae, ae, but oh, I'm sair hadden doun wi' the bubbly +jock[171]." + +I have received two anecdotes illustrative both of the occasional +acutenesss of mind, and of the sensitiveness of feeling occasionally +indicated by persons thus situated. A well-known idiot, Jamie Fraser, +belonging to the parish of Lunan, in Forfarshire, quite surprised people +sometimes by his replies. The congregation of his parish church had for +some time distressed the minister by their habit of sleeping in church. +He had often endeavoured to impress them with a sense of the impropriety +of such conduct, and one day Jamie was sitting in the front gallery, +wide awake, when many were slumbering round him. The clergyman +endeavoured to draw the attention of his hearers to his discourse by +stating the fact, saying, "You see even Jamie Fraser, the idiot, does +not fall asleep, as so many of you are doing." Jamie, not liking, +perhaps, to be thus designated, coolly replied, "An I hadna been an +idiot, I micht ha' been sleepin' too." Another of these imbeciles, +belonging to Peebles, had been sitting at church for some time listening +attentively to a strong representation from the pulpit of the guilt of +deceit and falsehood in Christian characters. He was observed to turn +red, and grow very uneasy, until at last, as if wincing under the +supposed attack upon himself personally, he roared out, "Indeed, +minister, there's mair leears in Peebles than me." As examples of this +class of persons possessing much of the dry humour of their more sane +countrymen, and of their facility to utter sly and ready-witted sayings, +I have received the two following from Mr. W. Chambers:--Daft Jock Gray, +the supposed original of David Gellatley, was one day assailed by the +minister of a south-country parish on the subject of his idleness. +"John," said the minister, rather pompously, "you are a very idle +fellow; you might surely herd a few cows." "Me hird!" replied Jock; "I +dinna ken corn frae gerss." + +"There was a carrier named Davie Loch who was reputed to be rather light +of wits, but at the same time not without a sense of his worldly +interests. His mother, finding her end approaching, addressed her son in +the presence of a number of the neighbours. 'The house will be Davie's +and the furniture too.' 'Eh, hear her,' quoth Davie; 'sensible to the +last, sensible to the last.' 'The lyin' siller'--'Eh yes; how clear she +is about everything!' 'The lyin' siller is to be divided between my twa +dauchters.' 'Steek the bed doors, steek the bed doors[172],' interposed +Davie; 'she's ravin' now;' and the old dying woman was shut up +accordingly." + +In the _Memorials of the Montgomeries_, Earls of Eglinton, vol. i. p. +134, occurs an anecdote illustrative of the peculiar acuteness and +quaint humour which occasionally mark the sayings of persons considered +as imbeciles. There was a certain "Daft Will Speir," who was a +privileged haunter of Eglinton Castle and grounds. He was discovered by +the Earl one day taking a near cut, and crossing a fence in the demesne. +The Earl called out, "Come back, sir, that's not the road." "Do you +ken," said Will, "whaur I'm gaun?" "No," replied his lordship. "Weel, +hoo the deil do ye ken whether this be the road or no?" + +This same "Daft Will Speir" was passing the minister's glebe, where +haymaking was in progress. The minister asked Will if he thought the +weather would keep up, as it looked rather like rain. "Weel," said Will, +"I canna be very sure, but I'll be passin' this way the nicht, an' I'll +ca' in and tell ye." "Well, Will," said his master one day to him, +seeing that he had just finished his dinner, "have you had a good dinner +to day?" (Will had been grumbling some time before.) "Ou, vera gude," +answered Will; "but gin onybody asks if I got a dram after't, what will +I say?" This poor creature had a high sense of duty. It appears he had +been given the charge of the coal-stores at the Earl of Eglinton's. +Having on one occasion been reprimanded for allowing the supplies to run +out before further supplies were ordered, he was ever afterwards most +careful to fulfil his duty. In course of time poor Will became "sick +unto death," and the minister came to see him. Thinking him in really a +good frame of mind, the minister asked him, in presence of the laird and +others, if there were not one _great_ thought which was ever to him the +highest consolation in his hour of trouble. "Ou ay," gasped the +sufferer, "Lord be thankit, a' the bunkers are fu'!" + +The following anecdote is told regarding the late Lord Dundrennan:--A +half silly basket-woman passing down his avenue at Compstone one day, +he met her, and said, "My good woman, there's no road this way." "Na, +sir," she said, "I think ye're wrang there; I think it's a most +beautifu' road." + +These poor creatures have invariably a great delight in attending +funerals. In many country places hardly a funeral ever took place +without the attendance of the parochial idiot. It seemed almost a +necessary association; and such attendance seemed to constitute the +great delight of those creatures. I have myself witnessed again and +again the sort of funeral scene portrayed by Sir Walter Scott, who no +doubt took his description from what was common in his day:--"The +funeral pomp set forth--saulies with their batons and gumphions of +tarnished white crape. Six starved horses, themselves the very emblems +of mortality, well cloaked and plumed, lugging along the hearse with its +dismal emblazonry, crept in slow pace towards the place of interment, +preceded by Jamie Duff, an idiot, who, with weepers and cravat made of +white paper, _attended on every funeral_, and followed by six mourning +coaches filled with the company."--_Guy Mannering_. + +The following anecdote, supplied by Mr. Blair, is an amusing +illustration both of the funeral propensity, and of the working of a +defective brain, in a half-witted carle, who used to range the province +of Galloway armed with a huge pike-staff, and who one day met a funeral +procession a few miles from Wigtown. A long train of carriages, and +farmers riding on horse-back, suggested the propriety of his bestriding +his staff, and following after the funeral. The procession marched at a +brisk pace, and on reaching the kirk-yard style, as each rider +dismounted, "Daft Jock" descended from his wooden steed, besmeared with +mire and perspiration, exclaiming, "Hech, sirs, had it no been for the +fashion o' the thing, I micht as weel hae been on my ain feet." + +The withdrawal of these characters from public view, and the loss of +importance which they once enjoyed in Scottish society, seem to me +inexplicable. Have they ceased to exist, or are they removed from our +sight to different scenes? The fool was, in early times, a very +important personage in most Scottish households of any distinction. +Indeed this had been so common as to be a public nuisance. + +It seemed that persons _assumed_ the character, for we find a Scottish +Act of Parliament, dated 19th January 1449, with this title:--"Act for +the way-putting of _Fenyent_ Fules," etc. (Thomson's Acts of Parliament +of Scotland, vol. i.); and it enacts very stringent measures against +such persons. They seem to have formed a link between the helpless idiot +and the boisterous madman, sharing the eccentricity of the latter and +the stupidity of the former, generally adding, however, a good deal of +the sharp-wittedness of the _knave_. Up to the middle of the eighteenth +century this appears to have been still an appendage to some families. I +have before me a little publication with the title, "The Life and Death +of Jamie Fleeman, the Laird of Udny's Fool. Tenth edition. Aberdeen, +1810." With portrait. Also twenty-sixth edition, of 1829. I should +suppose this account of a family fool was a fair representation of a +good specimen of the class. He was evidently of defective intellect, but +at times showed the odd humour and quick conclusion which so often mark +the disordered brain. I can only now give two examples taken from his +history:--Having found a horse-shoe on the road, he met Mr. Craigie, the +minister of St. Fergus, and showed it to him, asking, in pretended +ignorance, what it was. "Why, Jamie," said Mr. Craigie, good +humouredly, "anybody that was not a fool would know that it is a +horse-shoe." "Ah!" said Jamie, with affected simplicity, "what it is to +be wise--to ken it's no a meer's shoe!" + +On another occasion, when all the country-side were hastening to the +Perth races, Jamie had cut across the fields and reached a bridge near +the town, and sat down upon the parapet. He commenced munching away at a +large portion of a leg of mutton which he had somehow become possessed +of, and of which he was amazingly proud. The laird came riding past, and +seeing Jamie sitting on the bridge, accosted him:--"Ay, Fleeman, are ye +here already?" "Ou ay," quoth Fleeman, with an air of assumed dignity +and archness not easy to describe, while his eye glanced significantly +towards the mutton, "Ou ay, ye ken a body when he _has anything_." + +Of witty retorts by half-witted creatures of this class, I do not know +of one more pointed than what is recorded of such a character who used +to hang about the residence of a late Lord Fife. It would appear that +some parts of his lordship's estates, were barren, and in a very +unproductive condition. Under the improved system of agriculture and of +draining, great preparations had been made for securing a good crop in a +certain field, where Lord Fife, his factor, and others interested in the +subject, were collected together. There was much discussion, and some +difference of opinion, as to the crop with which the field had best be +sown. The idiot retainer, who had been listening unnoticed to all that +was said, at last cried out, "Saw't wi' factors, ma lord; they are sure +to thrive everywhere." + +There was an idiot who lived long in Lauder, and seems to have had a +great resemblance to the jester of old times. He was a staunch +supporter of the Established Church. One day some one gave him a bad +shilling. On Sunday he went to the Seceders' meeting-house, and when the +ladle was taken round he put in his bad shilling and took out +elevenpence halfpenny. Afterwards he went in high glee to the late Lord +Lauderdale, calling out, "I've cheated the Seceders the day, my lord; +I've cheated the Seceders." + +Jemmy had long harboured a dislike to the steward on the property, which +he made manifest in the following manner:--Lord Lauderdale and Sir +Anthony Maitland used to take him out shooting; and one day Lord +Maitland (he was then), on having to cross the Leader, said, "Now, +Jemmy, you shall carry me through the water," which Jemmy duly did. The +steward, who was shooting with them, expected the same service, and +accordingly said, "Now, Jemmy, you must carry _me_ over." "Vera weel," +said Jemmy. He took the steward on his back, and when he had carefully +carried him half-way across the river he paid off his grudge by dropping +him quietly into the water. + +A daft individual used to frequent the same district, about whom a +variety of opinions were entertained,--some people thinking him not so +foolish as he sometimes seemed. On one occasion a person, wishing to +test whether he knew the value of money, held out a sixpence and a +penny, and offered him his choice. "I'll tak the wee ane," he said, +giving as his modest reason, "I'se no be greedy." At another time, a +miller laughing at him for his witlessness, he said, "Some things I ken, +and some I dinna ken." On being asked what he knew, he said, "I ken a +miller has aye a gey fat sou." "An' what d'ye no ken?" said the miller. +"Ou," he returned, "I dinna ken wha's expense she's fed at." + +A very amusing collision of one of those penurious lairds, already +referred to, a certain Mr. Gordon of Rothie, with a half-daft beggar +wanderer of the name of Jock Muilton, has been recorded. The laird was +very shabby, as usual, and, meeting Jock, began to banter him on the +subject of his dress:--"Ye're very grand, Jock. Thae's fine claes ye hae +gotten; whaur did ye get that coat?" Jock told him who had given him his +coat, and then, looking slily at the laird, he inquired, as with great +simplicity, "And whaur did ye get _yours_, laird?" + +For another admirable story of a rencontre between a penurious laird and +the parish natural I am indebted to the _Scotsman_, June 16, 1871. Once +on a time there was a Highland laird renowned for his caution in money +matters, and his precise keeping of books. His charities were there; but +that department of his bookkeeping was not believed to be heavy. On +examination, a sum of half-a-crown was unexpectedly discovered in it; +but this was accounted for in a manner creditable to his intentions, if +not to his success in executing them. It had been given in mistake +instead of a coin of a different denomination, to "the natural" of the +parish for holding his shelty while he transacted business at the bank. +A gleam in the boy's eye drew his attention to a gleam of white as the +metal dropped into his pocket. In vain the laird assured him it was not +a good bawbee--if he would give it up he would get another--it was "guid +eneuch" for the like of him. And when the laird in his extremity swore a +great oath that unless it was given up he would never give another +halfpenny, the answer was--"Ech, laird, it wad be lang or ye gied +me saxty." + +Another example of shrewd and ready humour in one of that class is the +following:--In this case the idiot was musical, and earned a few stray +pence by playing Scottish airs on a flute. He resided at Stirling, and +used to hang about the door of the inn to watch the arrival and +departure of travellers. A lady, who used to give him something +occasionally, was just starting, and said to Jamie that she had only a +fourpenny piece, and that he must be content with that, for she could +not stay to get more. Jamie was not satisfied, and as the lady drove +out, he expressed his feelings by playing with all his might, "O wearie +o' the _toom pouch_[173]." + +The spirit in Jamie Fraser before mentioned, and which had kept him +awake, shows itself in idiots occasionally by making them restless and +troublesome. One of this character had annoyed the clergyman where he +attended church by fidgeting, and by uncouth sounds which he uttered +during divine service. Accordingly, one day before church began, he was +cautioned against moving, or "making a whisht," under the penalty of +being turned out. The poor creature sat quite still and silent, till, in +a very important part of the sermon, he felt an inclination to cough. So +he shouted out, "Minister, may a puir body like me noo gie a +hoast[174]?" + +I have two anecdotes of two peers, who might be said to come under the +description of half-witted. In their case the same sort of dry Scotch +humour came out under the cloak of mental disease. The first is of a +Scottish nobleman of the last century who had been a soldier the greater +part of his life, but was obliged to come home on account of aberration +of mind, superinduced by hereditary propensity. Desirous of putting him +under due restraint, and at the same time of engaging his mind in his +favourite pursuit, his friends secured a Sergeant Briggs to be his +companion, and, in fact, keeper. To render the sergeant acceptable as a +companion they introduced him to the old earl as _Colonel_ Briggs. Being +asked how he liked "the colonel," the earl showed how acute he still was +by his answer, "Oh, very well; he is a sensible man, and a good soldier, +but he _smells damnably of the halbert_." + +The second anecdote relates also to a Scottish nobleman labouring under +aberration of mind, and is, I believe, a traditionary one. In Scotland, +some hundred years ago, madhouses did not exist, or were on a very +limited scale; and there was often great difficulty in procuring +suitable accommodation for patients who required special treatment and +seclusion from the world. The gentleman in question had been consigned +to the Canongate prison, and his position there was far from +comfortable. An old friend called to see him, and asked how it had +happened that he was placed in so unpleasant a situation. His reply was, +"Sir, it was more the kind interest and patronage of my friends than my +own merits that have placed me here." "But have you not remonstrated or +complained?" asked his visitor. "I told them" said his lordship, "that +they were a pack of infernal villains." "Did you?" said his friend; +"that was bold language; and what did they say to that?" "Oh," said the +peer, "I took care not to tell them till they were fairly out of the +place, and weel up the Canongate." + +In Peebles there was a crazy being of this kind called "Daft Yedie." On +one occasion he saw a gentleman, a stranger in the town, who had a club +foot. Yedie contemplated this phenomenon with some interest, and, +addressing the gentleman, said compassionately, "It's a great pity--its +spoils the boot." There is a story of one of those half-witted creatures +of a different character from the humorous ones already recorded; I +think it is exceedingly affecting. The story is traditionary in a +country district, and I am not aware of its being ever printed. + +A poor boy, of this class, who had evidently manifested a tendency +towards religious and devotional feelings, asked permission from the +clergyman to attend the Lord's Table and partake of the holy communion +with the other members of the congregation (whether Episcopalian or +Presbyterian I do not know). The clergyman demurred for some time, under +the impression of his mind being incapable of a right and due +understanding of the sacred ordinance. But observing the extreme +earnestness of the poor boy, he at last gave consent, and he was allowed +to come. He was much affected, and all the way home was heard to +exclaim, "Oh! I hae seen the pretty man." This referred to his seeing +the Lord Jesus whom he had approached in the sacrament. He kept +repeating the words, and went with them on his lips to rest for the +night. Not appearing at the usual hour for breakfast, when they went to +his bedside they found him dead! The excitement had been too much--mind +and body had given way--and the half-idiot of earth awoke to the glories +and the bliss of his Redeemer's presence. + +Analogous with the language of the _defective_ intellect is the language +of the imperfectly formed intellect, and I have often thought there was +something very touching and very fresh in the expression of feelings and +notions by children. I have given examples before, but the following is, +to my taste, a charming specimen:--A little boy had lived for some time +with a very penurious uncle, who took good care that the child's health +should not be injured by over-feeding. The uncle was one day walking +out, the child at his side, when a friend accosted him, accompanied by a +greyhound. While the elders were talking, the little fellow, never +having seen a dog so slim and slight of form, clasped the creature round +the neck with the impassioned cry, "Oh, doggie, doggie, and div ye live +wi' your uncle tae, that ye are so thin?" + +In connection with funerals, I am indebted to the kindness of Lord +Kinloch for a characteristic anecdote of cautious Scottish character in +the west country. It was the old fashion, still practised in some +districts, to carry the coffin to the grave on long poles, or "spokes," +as they were commonly termed. There were usually two bearers abreast on +each side. On a certain occasion one of the two said to his companion, +"I'm awfu' tired wi' carryin'." "Do you _carry_?" was the interrogatory +in reply. "Yes; what do you do?" "Oh," said the other, "I aye _lean_." +His friend's fatigue was at once accounted for. + +I am strongly tempted to give an account of a parish functionary in the +words of a kind correspondent from Kilmarnock, although communicated in +the following very flattering terms:--"In common with every Scottish man +worthy of the name, I have been delighted with your book, and have the +ambition to add a pebble to the cairn, and accordingly send you a +_bellman story_; it has, at least, the merit of being unprinted and +unedited." + +The incumbent of Craigie parish, in this district of Ayrshire, had asked +a Mr. Wood, tutor in the Cairnhill family, to officiate for him on a +particular Sunday. Mr. Wood, however, between the time of being asked +and the appointed day, got intimation of the dangerous illness of his +father; in the hurry of setting out to see him, he forgot to arrange for +the pulpit being filled. The bellman of Craigie parish, by name Matthew +Dinning, and at this time about eighty years of age, was a very little +"crined[175]" old man, and always wore a broad Scottish blue bonnet, +with a red "bob" on the top. The parish is a small rural one, so that +Matthew knew every inhabitant in it, and had seen most of them grow up. +On this particular day, after the congregation had waited for some time, +Matthew was seen to walk very slowly up the middle of the church, with +the large Bible and psalm-book under his arm, to mount the pulpit stair; +and after taking his bonnet off, and smoothing down his forehead with +his "loof," thus addressed the audience:-- + +"My freens, there was ane Wuds tae hae preached here the day, but he has +nayther comed himsell, nor had the ceevility tae sen' us the scart o' a +pen. Ye'll bide here for ten meenonts, and gin naebody comes forrit in +that time, ye can gang awa' hame. Some say his feyther's dead; as for +that I kenna." + +The following is another illustration of the character of the old +Scottish betheral. One of those worthies, who was parochial +grave-digger, had been missing for two days or so, and the minister had +in vain sent to discover him at most likely places. He bethought, at +last, to make inquiry at a "public" at some distance from the village, +and on entering the door he met his man in the trance, quite fou, +staggering out, supporting himself with a hand on each wa'. To the +minister's sharp rebuke and rising wrath for his indecent and shameful +behaviour, John, a wag in his way, and emboldened by liquor, made +answer, "'Deed, sir, sin' I ca'd at the manse, I hae buried an auld +wife, and I've just drucken her, hough an' horn." Such was his candid +admission of the manner in which he had disposed of the church fees paid +for the interment. + +An encounter of wits between a laird and an elder:--A certain laird in +Fife, well known for his parsimonious habits, and who, although his +substance largely increased, did not increase his liberality in his +weekly contribution to the church collection, which never exceeded the +sum of one penny, one day by mistake dropped into the plate at the door +half-a-crown; but discovering his error before he was seated in his pew, +he hurried back, and was about to replace the coin by his customary +penny, when the elder in attendance cried out, "Stop, laird; ye may put +_in_ what ye like, but ye maun tak naething _oot_!" The laird, finding +his explanations went for nothing, at last said, "Aweel, I suppose I'll +get credit for it in heaven." "Na, na, laird," said the elder, +sarcastically; "ye'll only get credit for the _penny_." + +The following is not a bad specimen of sly _piper_ wit:-- + +The Rev. Mr. Johnstone of Monquhitter, a very grandiloquent pulpit +orator in his day, accosting a travelling piper, well known in the +district, with the question, "Well, John, how does the wind pay?" +received from John, with a low bow, the answer, "Your Reverence has the +advantage of me." + +Apropos to stories connected with ministers and pipers, there cannot be +a better specimen than the famous one preserved by Sir Walter Scott, in +his notes to _Waverley_, which I am tempted to reproduce, as possibly +some of my readers may have forgotten it. The gudewife of the inn at +Greenlaw had received four clerical guests into her house, a father and +three sons. The father took an early opportunity of calling the +attention of the landlady to the subject of his visit, and, introducing +himself, commenced in rather a pompous manner--"Now, confess, Luckie +Buchan, you never remember having such a party in your house before. +Here am I, a placed minister, with my three sons, who are themselves +_all_ placed ministers." The landlady, accustomed to a good deal of +deference and attention from the county families, not quite liking the +high tone assumed by the minister on the occasion, and being well aware +that all the four were reckoned very poor and uninteresting preachers, +answered rather drily, "'Deed, minister, I canna just say that I ever +had sic a party before in the hoose, except it were in the '45, when I +had a piper and his three sons--_a_' pipers. But" (she added quietly, as +if aside), "deil a spring could they play amang them." + +I have received from Rev. William Blair, A.M., U.P. minister at +Dunblane, many kind communications. I have made a selection, which I now +group together, and they have this character in common, that they are +all anecdotes of ministers:-- + +Rev. Walter Dunlop of Dumfries was well known for pithy and facetious +replies; he was kindly known under the appellation of our "Watty +Dunlop." On one occasion two irreverent young fellows determined, as +they said, to "taigle[176]" the minister. Coming up to him in the High +Street of Dumfries, they accosted him with much solemnity--"Maister +Dunlop, dae ye hear the news?" "What news?" "Oh, the deil's deed." "Is +he?" said Mr. Dunlop, "then I maun pray for twa faitherless bairns." On +another occasion Mr. Dunlop met, with characteristic humour, an attempt +to play off a trick against him. It was known that he was to dine with a +minister whose house was close to the church, so that his return back +must be through the churchyard. Accordingly some idle and mischievous +youths waited for him in the dark night, and one of them came up to him, +dressed as a ghost, in hopes of putting him in a fright. Watty's cool +accost speedily upset the plan:--"Weel, Maister Ghaist, is this a +general rising, or are ye juist takin' a daunder frae yer grave by +yersell?" I have received from a correspondent another specimen of +Watty's acute rejoinders. Some years ago the celebrated Edward Irving +had been lecturing at Dumfries, and a man who passed as a wag in that +locality had been to hear him. He met Watty Dunlop the following day, +who said, "Weel, Willie, man, an' what do ye think of Mr. Irving?" "Oh," +said Willie, contemptuously, "the man's crack't." Dunlop patted him on +the shoulder, with a quiet remark, "Willie, ye'll aften see a light +peeping through a crack!" + +He was accompanying a funeral one day, when he met a man driving a flock +of geese. The wayward disposition of the bipeds at the moment was too +much for the driver's temper, and he indignantly cried out, "Deevil +choke them!" Mr. Dunlop walked a little farther on, and passed a +farm-stead, where a servant was driving out a number of swine, and +banning them with "Deevil tak them!" Upon which, Mr. Dunlop stepped up +to him, and said, "Ay, ay, my man; your gentleman'll be wi' ye i' the +noo: he's juist back the road there a bit, choking some geese till +a man." + +Shortly after the Disruption, Dr. Cook of St. Andrews was introduced to +Mr. Dunlop, upon which occasion Mr. Dunlop said, "Weel, sir, ye've been +lang Cook, Cooking them, but ye've dished them at last." + +Mr. Clark of Dalreoch, whose head was vastly disproportioned to his +body, met Mr. Dunlop one day. "Weel, Mr. Clark, that's a great head o' +yours." "Indeed it is, Mr. Dunlop; I could contain yours inside of my +own." "Juist sae," quietly replied Mr. Dunlop; "I was e'en thinkin' it +was geyan _toom_[177]." + +Mr. Dunlop happened one day to be present in a church court of a +neighbouring presbytery. A Rev. Doctor was asked to pray, and declined. +On the meeting adjourning, Mr. Dunlop stepped up to the Doctor, and +asked how he did. The Doctor, never having been introduced, did not +reply. Mr. Dunlop withdrew, and said to his friend, "Eh! but isna he a +queer man, that Doctor, he'll neither speak to God nor man." + +The Rev. John Brown of Whitburn was riding out one day on an old pony, +when he was accosted by a rude youth: "I say, Mr. Broon, what gars your +horse's tail wag that way?" "Oo, juist what gars your tongue wag; it's +fashed wi' a _wakeness_." + +About sixty years ago there were two ministers in Sanquhar of the name +of Thomson, one of whom was father of the late Dr. Andrew Thomson of +Edinburgh, the other was father of Dr. Thomson of Balfron. The domestic +in the family of the latter was rather obtrusive with her secret +devotions, sometimes kneeling on the stairs at night, and talking loud +enough to be heard. On a communion season she was praying devoutly and +exclusively for her minister: "Remember Mr. Tamson, no him at the Green, +but oor ain Mr. Tamson." + +Rev. Mr. Leslie of Morayshire combined the duties of justice of peace +with those of parochial clergyman. One day he was taken into confidence +by a culprit who had been caught in the act of smuggling, and was +threatened with a heavy fine. The culprit was a staunch Seceder, and +owned a small farm. Mr. Leslie, with an old-fashioned zeal for the +Established Church, said to him, "The king will come in the cadger's +road some day. Ye wadna come to the parish kirk, though it were to save +your life, wad ye? Come noo, an' I'se mak ye a' richt!" Next Sabbath the +seceding smuggler appeared in the parish kirk, and as the paupers were +receiving parochial allowance, Mr. Leslie slipped a shilling into the +smuggler's hand. When the J.P. Court was held, Mr. Leslie was present, +when a fine was proposed to be exacted from the smuggler. "Fine!" said +Mr. Leslie; "he's mair need o' something to get duds to his back. He's +are o' my _poor roll_; I gie'd him a shilling just last Sabbath." + +A worthy old Seceder used to ride from Gargunnock to Bucklyvie every +Sabbath to attend the Burgher kirk. One day as he rode past the parish +kirk of Kippen, the elder at the plate accosted him, "I'm sure, John, +it's no like the thing to see you ridin' in sic a doon-pour o' rain sae +far by to thae Seceders. Ye ken the mercifu' man is mercifu' to his +beast. Could ye no step in by?" "Weel," said John, "I wadna care sae +muckle about stablin' my beast inside, but it's anither thing mysel' +gain' in." + +The Rev. Dr. George Lawson of Selkirk acted for many years as +theological tutor to the Secession Church. One day, on entering the +Divinity Hall, he overheard a student remark that the professor's wig +was uncombed. That same student, on that very day, had occasion to +preach a sermon before the Doctor, for which he received a bit of severe +criticism, the sting of which was in its tail: "You said my wig wasna +kaimed this mornin', my lad, but I think I've redd your head to you." + +The Rev. John Heugh of Stirling was one day admonishing one of his +people of the sin of intemperance: "Man, John, you should never drink +except when you're dry." "Weel, sir," quoth John, "that's what I'm aye +doin', for I am never slocken'd." + +The Rev. Mr. M---- of Bathgate came up to a street-paviour one day, and +addressed him, "Eh, John, what's this you're at?" "Oh! I'm mending the +ways o' Bathgate!" "Ah, John, I've long been trying to mend the ways o' +Bathgate, an' they're no weel yet." "Weel, Mr. M., if you had tried my +plan, and come doon to your _knees_, ye wad maybe hae come mair speed!" + +There once lived in Cupar a merchant whose store contained supplies of +every character and description, so that he was commonly known by the +sobriquet of Robbie A'Thing. One day a minister, who was well known for +a servile use of MS. in the pulpit, called at the store, asking for a +rope and pin to tether a young calf in the glebe. Robbie at once +informed him that he could not furnish such articles to him. But the +minister, being somewhat importunate, said, "Oh! I thought you were +named Robbie A'Thing from the fact of your keeping all kinds of goods." +"Weel a weel," said Robbie, "I keep a'thing in my shop but calf's +tether-pins and paper sermons for ministers to read." + +It was a somewhat whimsical advice, supported by whimsical argument, +which used to be given by an old Scottish minister to young preachers, +when they visited from home, to "sup well at the kail, for if they were +good they were worth the supping, and if not they might be sure there +was not much worth coming _after_ them." + +A good many families in and around Dunblane rejoice in the patronymic of +Dochart. This name, which sounds somewhat Irish, is derived from Loch +Dochart, in Perthshire. The M'Gregors having been proscribed, were +subjected to severe penalties, and a group of the clan having been +hunted by their superiors, swam the stream which issues from Loch +Dochart, and in gratitude to the river they afterwards assumed the +family name of Dochart. A young lad of this name, on being sent to +Glasgow College, presented a letter from his minister to Rev. Dr. Heugh +of Glasgow. He gave his name as Dochart, and the name in the letter was +M'Gregor. "Oh," said the Doctor, "I fear there is some mistake about +your identity, the names don't agree." "Weel, sir, that's the way they +spell the name in our country." + +The relative whom I have mentioned as supplying so many Scottish +anecdotes had many stories of a parochial functionary whose +eccentricities have, in a great measure, given way before the +assimilating spirit of the times. I mean the old SCOTTISH BEADLE, or +betheral, as he used to be called. Some classes of men are found to have +that nameless but distinguishing characteristic of figure and aspect +which marks out particular occupations and professions of mankind. This +was so much the case in the betheral class, that an old lady, observing +a well-known judge and advocate walking together in the street, remarked +to a friend as they passed by, "Dear me, Lucy, wha are thae twa +_beddle-looking_ bodies?" They were often great originals, and, I +suspect, must have been in past times somewhat given to convivial +habits, from a remark I recollect of the late Baron Clerk Rattray, viz. +that in his younger days he had hardly ever known a perfectly sober +betheral. However this may have been, they were, as a class, remarkable +for quaint humour, and for being shrewd observers of what was going on. +I have heard of an occasion where the betheral made his wit furnish an +apology for his want of sobriety. He had been sent round the parish by +the minister to deliver notices at all the houses, of the catechising +which was to precede the preparation for receiving the communion. On his +return it was quite evident that he had partaken too largely of +refreshment since he had been on his expedition. The minister reproached +him for this improper conduct. The betheral pleaded the pressing +_hospitality_ of the parishioners. The clergyman did not admit the plea, +and added, "Now, John, I go through the parish, and you don't see me +return fou, as you have done." "Ay, minister," rejoined the betheral, +with much complacency, "but then aiblins ye're no sae popular i' the +parish as me." + +My relative used to tell of one of these officials receiving, with much +ceremony, a brother betheral, from a neighbouring parish, who had come +with the minister thereof for the purpose of preaching on some special +occasion. After service, the betheral of the stranger clergyman felt +proud of the performance of the appointed duty, and said in a triumphant +tone to his friend, "I think oor minister did weel; ay, he gars the +stour flee oot o' the cushion." To which the other rejoined, with a calm +feeling of superiority, "Stour oot o' the cushion! hout, our minister, +sin' he cam wi' us, has dung the guts oot o' twa Bibles." Another +description I have heard of an energetic preacher more forcible than +delicate--"Eh, oor minister had a great power o' watter, for he grat, +and spat, and swat like mischeef." An obliging anonymous correspondent +has sent me a story of a functionary of this class whose pride was +centred not so much in the performance of the minister as of the +precentor. He states that he remembers an old beadle of the church which +was called "Haddo's Hole," and sometimes the "Little Kirk," in +Edinburgh, whose son occasionally officiated as precentor. He was not +very well qualified for the duty, but the father had a high opinion of +his son's vocal powers. In those days there was always service in the +church on the Tuesday evenings; and when the father was asked on such +occasions, "Who's to preach to-night?" his self-complacent reply used to +be, "I divna ken wha's till preach, but my son's for till precent." The +following is a more correct version of a betheral story than one which +occupied this page in the last edition. The beadle had been asked to +recommend a person for the same office, and his answer was, "If ye had +wanted twa or three bits o' elder bodies, I cud hae gotten them for ye +as easily as penny baps oot of Mr. Rowan's shop," pointing to a baker's +shop opposite to where the colloquy took place; "or even if ye had +wanted a minister, I might hae helpit ye to get ane; but as for a gude +_beadle_, that's about the maist difficult thing I ken o' just now." + +Perhaps the following may seem to illustrate the self-importance of the +betheral tribe. The Rev. Dr. Hugh Blair was one Sunday absent from his +pulpit, and next morning meeting his beadle in the street he inquired +how matters went in the High Church on Sabbath. "'Deed, I dare say no +very weel," was the answer; "I wasna there ony mair than yoursell." + +Mr. Turnbull of Dundee kindly sends me an excellent anecdote of the +"Betheral" type, which illustrates the _esprit de corps_ of the +betherelian mind. The late Dr. Robertson of Glasgow had, while in the +parish of Mains, a quaint old church attendant of the name of Walter +Nicoll, commonly called "Watty Nuckle," whom he invited to come and +visit him after he had been removed to Glasgow. Watty accordingly +ventured on the (to him) terrible journey, and was received by the +Doctor with great kindness. The Doctor, amongst other sights, took him +to see the Cathedral church, and showed him all through it, and after +they were coming away the Doctor asked Watty what he thought of it, and +if it was not better than the Mains church. Watty shook his head, and +said, "Aweel, sir, you see she's bigger; but she has nae laft, and she's +sair fashed wi' thae pillars." + +On the same subject of beadle peculiarities, I have received from Mrs. +Mearns of Kineff Manse an exquisitely characteristic illustration of +beadle _professional_ habits being made to bear upon the tender +passion:--A certain beadle had fancied the manse housemaid, but at a +loss for an opportunity to declare himself, one day--a Sunday--when his +duties were ended, he looked sheepish, and said, "Mary, wad _ye_ tak a +turn, Mary?" He led her to the churchyard, and pointing with his finger, +got out, "My fowk lie there, Mary; wad ye like to lie there?" The +_grave_ hint was taken, and she became his wife, but does not yet +lie _there_. + +Here is another good example of betheral refinement or philosophy.--He +was carefully dressing up a grave, and adjusting the turf upon it. The +clergyman, passing through the churchyard, observed, "That's beautiful +sod, Jeems." "Indeed is't, minister, and I grudge it upon the grave o' +sic a scamp." + +This class of functionaries were very free in their remarks upon the +preaching of strangers, who used occasionally to occupy the pulpit of +their church--the city betherals speaking sometimes in a most +condescending manner of clergy from the provincial parishes. As, for +example, a betheral of one of the large churches in Glasgow, criticising +the sermon of a minister from the country who had been preaching in the +city church, characterised it as "gude coorse country wark." A betheral +of one of the churches of St. Giles, Edinburgh, used to call on the +family of Mr. Robert Stevenson, engineer, who was one of the elders. On +one occasion they asked him what had been the text on such a night, when +none of the family had been present. The man of office, confused at the +question, and unwilling to show anything like ignorance, poured forth, +"Weel, ye see, the text last day was just entirely, sirs--yes--the text, +sirs--what was it again?--ou ay, just entirely, ye see it was, 'What +profiteth a man if he lose the world, and gain his own soul?'" Most of +such stories are usually of an old standing. A more recent one has been +told me of a betheral of a royal burgh much decayed from former +importance, and governed by a feeble municipality of old men, who +continued in office, and in fact constituted rather the shadow than the +substance of a corporation. A clergyman from a distance having come to +officiate in the parish church, the betheral, knowing the terms on which +it was usual for the minister officiating to pray for the efficiency of +the local magistracy, quietly cautioned the clergyman before service +that, in regard to the town-council there, it would be quite out of +place for him to pray that they should be a "terror to evil-doers," +because, as he said, "the puir auld bodies could be nae terror to +onybody." A minister of Easter Anstruther, during the last century, used +to say of the magistrates of Wester Anstruther, that "instead of being a +terror to evil-doers, evil-doers were a terror to them." + +The "minister's man" was a functionary well known in many parishes, and +who often evinced much Scottish humour and original character. These men +were (like the betheral) great critics of sermons, and often severe upon +strangers, sometimes with a sly hit at their own minister. One of these, +David, a well-known character, complimenting a young minister who had +preached, told him, "Your introduction, sir, is aye grand; its worth a' +the rest o' the sermon--could ye no mak it a' introduction?" + +David's criticisms of his master's sermons were sometimes sharp enough +and shrewd. On one occasion, driving the minister home from a +neighbouring church where he had been preaching, and who, as he thought, +had acquitted himself pretty well, inquired of David what _he_ thought +of it. The subject of discourse had been the escape of the Israelites +from Egypt. So David opened his criticism--"Thocht o't, sir? deed I +thocht nocht o't ava. It was a vara imperfect discourse in ma opinion; +ye did weel eneuch till ye took them through, but where did ye leave +them? just daunerin' o' the sea-shore without a place to gang till. Had +it no been for Pharaoh they had been better on the other side, where +they were comfortably encampit, than daunerin' where ye left them. It's +painful to hear a sermon stoppit afore it's richt ended, just as it is +to hear ane streekit out lang after it's dune. That's ma opinion o' the +sermon ye gied us to-day." "Very freely given, David, very freely given; +drive on a little faster, for I think ye're daunerin' noo yersell." + +To another who had gone through a long course of parish official life a +gentleman one day remarked--"John, ye hae been sae lang about the +minister's hand that I dare say ye could preach a sermon yersell now." +To which John modestly replied, "O na, sir, I couldna preach a sermon, +but maybe I could draw an inference." "Well, John," said the gentleman, +humouring the quiet vanity of the beadle, "what inference could ye draw +frae this text, 'A wild ass snuffeth up the wind at her pleasure?'" +(Jer. ii. 24). "Weel, sir, I wad draw this inference, he would snuff a +lang time afore he would fatten upon't." I had an anecdote from a +friend, of a reply from a betheral to the minister _in_ church, which +was quaint and amusing from the shrewd self-importance it indicated in +his own acuteness. The clergyman had been annoyed during the course of +his sermon by the restlessness and occasional whining of a dog, which at +last began to bark outright. He looked out for the beadle, and directed +him very peremptorily, "John, carry that dog out." John, looked up to +the pulpit, and with a very knowing expression, said, "Na, na, sir; I'se +just mak him gae out on his ain four legs." I have another story of +canine misbehaviour in church. A dog was present during the service, and +in the sermon the worthy minister was in the habit of speaking very +loud, and, in fact, when he got warmed with his subject, of shouting +almost at the top of his voice. The dog, who, in the early part, had +been very quiet, became quite excited, as is not uncommon with some dogs +when hearing a noise, and from whinging and whining, as the speaker's +voice rose loud and strong, at last began to bark and howl. The +minister, naturally much annoyed at the interruption, called upon the +betheral to put out the dog, who at once expressed his readiness to obey +the order, but could not resist the temptation to look up to the pulpit, +and to say very significantly, "Ay, ay, sir; but indeed it was yersell +began it." There is a dog story connected with Reminiscences of Glasgow +(see _Chambers's Journal_, March 1855), which is full of meaning. The +bowls of rum-punch which so remarkably characterised the Glasgow dinners +of last century and the early part of the present, it is to be feared +made some of the congregation given to somnolency on the Sundays +following. The members of the town-council often adopted Saturday for +such meetings; accordingly, the Rev. Mr. Thorn, an excellent +clergyman[178], took occasion to mark this propensity with some +acerbity. A dog had been very troublesome, and disturbed the +congregation for some time, when the minister at last gave orders to the +beadle, "Take out that dog; he'd wauken a Glasgow magistrate." + +The parochial gravediggers had sometimes a very familiar professional +style of dealing with the solemn subjects connected with their office. +Thus I have heard of a grave-digger pointing out a large human bone to a +lady who was looking at his work, of digging a grave, and asking +her--"D'ye ken wha's bane that is, mem?--that's Jenny Fraser's +hench-bane;" adding with a serious aspect--"a weel-baned family +thae Frasers." + +It would be impossible in these Reminiscences to omit the well-known and +often repeated anecdote connected with an eminent divine of our own +country, whose works take a high place in our theological literature. +The story to which I allude was rendered popular throughout the kingdom +some years ago, by the inimitable mode in which it was told, or rather +acted, by the late Charles Matthews. But Matthews was wrong in the +person of whom he related the humorous address. I have assurance of the +parties from a friend, whose father, a distinguished clergyman in the +Scottish Church at the time, had accurate knowledge of the whole +circumstances. The late celebrated Dr. Macknight, a learned and profound +scholar and commentator, was nevertheless, as a preacher, to a great +degree heavy, unrelieved by fancy or imagination; an able writer, but a +dull speaker. His colleague, Dr. Henry, well known as the author of a +History of England, was, on the other hand, a man of great humour, and +could not resist a joke when the temptation came upon him. On one +occasion when coming to church, Dr. Macknight had been caught in a +shower of rain, and entered the vestry soaked with wet. Every means were +used to relieve him from his discomfort; but as the time drew on for +divine service he became much distressed, and ejaculated over and over, +"Oh, I wush that I was dry; do you think I'm dry? do you think I'm dry +eneuch noo?" His jocose colleague could resist no longer, but, patting +him on the shoulder, comforted him with the sly assurance, "Bide a wee, +Doctor, and ye'se be _dry eneuch_ when ye get into the pu'pit." + +Another quaint remark of the facetious doctor to his more formal +colleague has been preserved by friends of the family. Dr. Henry, who +with all his pleasantry and abilities, had himself as little popularity +in the pulpit as his coadjutor, had been remarking to Dr. Macknight what +a blessing it was that they were two colleagues in one charge, and +continued dwelling on the subject so long, that Dr. Macknight, not quite +pleased at the frequent reiteration of the remark, said that it +certainly was a great pleasure to himself, but he did not see what great +benefit it might be to the world. "Ah," said Dr. Henry, "an it hadna +been for that, there wad hae been _twa_ toom[179] kirks this day." Lord +Cockburn tells a characteristic anecdote of Dr. Henry's behaviour the +last day of his life. I am indebted to a gentleman, himself also a +distinguished member of the Scottish Church, for an authentic anecdote +of this learned divine, and which occurred whilst Dr. Macknight was the +minister of Maybole. One of his parishioners, a well-known humorous +blacksmith of the parish, who, no doubt, thought that the Doctor's +learned books were rather a waste of time and labour for a country +pastor, was asked if his minister was at home. The Doctor was then busy +bringing out his laborious and valuable work, his _Harmony of the Four +Gospels_. "Na, he's gane to Edinburgh on a verra useless job." On being +asked what this useless work might be which engaged his pastor's time +and attention, he answered, "He's gane to mak four men agree wha ne'er +cast oot." The good-humoured and candid answer of a learned and rather +long-winded preacher of the old school always appeared to me quite +charming. The good man was far from being a popular preacher, and yet he +could not reduce his discourses below the hour and a half. On being +asked, as a gentle hint of their possibly needless length, if he did not +feel _tired_ after preaching so long, he replied, "Na, na, I'm no +tired;" adding, however, with much naivete, "But, Lord, how tired the +fowk whiles are." + +The late good kind-hearted Dr. David Dickson was fond of telling a story +of a Scottish termagant of the days before kirk-session discipline had +passed away. A couple were brought before the court, and Janet, the +wife, was charged with violent and undutiful conduct, and with wounding +her husband by throwing a three-legged stool at his head. The minister +rebuked her conduct, and pointed out its grievous character, by +explaining that just as Christ was head of his Church, so the husband +was head of the wife; and therefore in assaulting _him_, she had in fact +injured her own body. "Weel," she replied, "it's come to a fine pass gin +a wife canna kame her ain head;" "Ay, but, Janet," rejoined the +minister, "a three-legged stool is a thief-like bane-kame to scart yer +ain head wi'!" + +The following is a dry Scottish case, of a minister's wife quietly +"kaming her husband's head." Mr. Mair, a Scotch minister, was rather +short-tempered, and had a wife named Rebecca, whom for brevity's sake he +addressed as "Becky." He kept a diary, and among other entries, this one +was very frequent--"Becky and I had a rippet, for which I desire to be +humble." A gentleman who had been on a visit to the minister went to +Edinburgh, and told the story to a minister and his wife there; when the +lady replied "Weel, he must have been an excellent man, Mr. Mair. My +husband and I sometimes too have 'rippets,' but catch him if he's +ever humble." + +Our object in bringing up and recording anecdotes of this kind is to +elucidate the sort of humour we refer to, and to show it as a humour of +_past_ times. A modern clergyman could hardly adopt the tone and manner +of the older class of ministers--men not less useful and beloved, on +account of their odd Scottish humour, which indeed suited their time. +Could a clergyman, for instance, now come off from the trying position +in which we have heard of a northern minister being placed, and by the +same way through which he extricated himself with much good nature and +quiet sarcasm? A young man, sitting opposite to him in the front of the +gallery, had been up late on the previous night, and had stuffed the +cards with which he had been occupied into his coat pocket. Forgetting +the circumstance, he pulled out his handkerchief, and the cards all flew +about. The minister simply looked at him, and remarked, "Eh, man, your +psalm-buik has been ill bund." + +An admirable story of a quiet pulpit rebuke is traditionary in Fife, and +is told of Mr. Shirra, a Seceding minister of Kirkcaldy, a man still +well remembered by some of the older generation for many excellent and +some eccentric qualities. A young officer of a volunteer corps on duty +in the place, very proud of his fresh uniform, had come to Mr. Shirra's +church, and walked about as if looking for a seat, but in fact to show +off his dress, which he saw was attracting attention from some of the +less grave members of the congregation. He came to his place, however, +rather quickly, on Mr. Shirra quietly remonstrating, "O man, will ye sit +doun, and we'll see your new breeks when the kirk's dune." This same Mr. +Shirra was well known from his quaint, and, as it were, parenthetical +comments which he introduced in his reading of Scripture; as, for +example, on reading from the 116th Psalm, "I said in my haste all men +are liars," he quietly observed, "Indeed, Dauvid, my man, an' ye had +been i' this parish ye might hae said it at your leisure." + +There was something even still more pungent in the incidental remark of +a good man, in the course of his sermon, who had in a country place +taken to preaching out of doors in the summer afternoons. He used to +collect the people as they were taking air by the side of a stream +outside the village. On one occasion he had unfortunately taken his +place on a bank, and fixed himself on an _ants' nest_. The active habits +of those little creatures soon made the position of the intruder upon +their domain very uncomfortable; and, afraid that his audience might +observe something of this discomfort in his manner, he apologised by the +remark--"Brethren, though I hope I have the word of God in my mouth, I +think the deil himself has gotten into my breeks." + +There was often no doubt a sharp conflict of wits when some of these +humorist ministers came into collision with members of their flocks who +were _also_ humorists. Of this nature is the following anecdote, which I +am assured is genuine:--A minister in the north was taking to task one +of his hearers who was a frequent defaulter, and was reproaching him as +a habitual absentee from public worship. The accused vindicated himself +on the plea of a dislike to long sermons. "'Deed, man," said the +reverend monitor, a little nettled at the insinuation thrown out against +himself, "if ye dinna mend, ye may land yersell where ye'll no be +troubled wi' mony sermons either lang or short." "Weel, aiblins sae," +retorted John, "but _that_ mayna be for want o' ministers." + +An answer to another clergyman, Mr. Shireff, parochial minister of St. +Ninian's, is indicative of Scottish and really clever wit. One of the +members of his church was John Henderson or Anderson--a very decent +douce shoemaker--and who left the church and joined the Independents, +who had a meeting in Stirling. Some time afterwards, when Mr. Shireff +met John on the road, he said, "And so, John, I understand you have +become an Independent?" "'Deed, sir," replied John, "that's true." "Oh, +John," said the minister, "I'm sure you ken that a rowin' (rolling) +stane gathers nae fog" (moss). "Ay," said John, "that's true too; but +can ye tell me what guid the fog does to the stane?" Mr. Shireff himself +afterwards became a Baptist. The wit, however, was all in favour of the +minister in the following:-- + +Dr. Gilchrist, formerly of the East Parish of Greenock, and who died +minister of the Canongate, Edinburgh, received an intimation of one of +his hearers who had been exceedingly irregular in his attendance that he +had taken seats in an Episcopal chapel. One day soon after, he met his +former parishioner, who told him candidly that he had "changed his +religion." "Indeed," said the Doctor quietly; "how's that? I ne'er heard +ye had ony." It was this same Dr. Gilchrist who gave the well-known +quiet but forcible rebuke to a young minister whom he considered rather +conceited and fond of putting forward his own doings, and who was to +officiate in the Doctor's church. He explained to him the mode in which +he usually conducted the service, and stated that he always finished the +prayer before the sermon with the Lord's Prayer. The young minister +demurred at this, and asked if he "might not introduce any other short +prayer?" "Ou ay," was the Doctor's quiet reply, "gif ye can gie us +onything _better_." + +There is a story current of a sharp hit at the pretensions of a minister +who required a little set down. The scene was on a Monday by a burn near +Inverness. A stranger is fishing by a burn-side one Monday morning, when +the parish minister accosts him from the other side of the stream +thus:--"Good sport?" "Not very." "I am also an angler," but, pompously, +"I am a _fisher of men_." "Are you always successful?" "Not very." "So I +guessed, as I keeked into your creel[180] yesterday." + +At Banchory, on Deeside, some of the criticisms and remarks on sermons +were very quaint and characteristic. My cousin had asked the Leys grieve +what he thought of a young man's preaching, who had been more successful +in appropriating the words than the ideas of Dr. Chalmers. He drily +answered, "Ou, Sir Thomas, just a floorish o' the surface." But the same +hearer bore this unequivocal testimony to another preacher whom he +really admired. He was asked if he did not think the sermon long: "Na, I +should nae hae thocht it lang an' I'd been sitting on thorns." + +I think the following is about as good a sample of what we call Scotch +"pawky" as any I know:--A countryman had lost his wife and a favourite +cow on the same day. His friends consoled him for the loss of the wife; +and being highly respectable, several hints and offers were made +towards getting another for him. "Ou ay," he at length replied; "you're +a' keen aneuch to get me anither wife, but no yin o' ye offers to gie me +anither coo." + +The following anecdotes, collected from different contributors, are fair +samples of the quaint and original character of Scottish ways and +expressions, now becoming more and more matters of reminiscence:--A poor +man came to his minister for the purpose of intimating his intention of +being married. As he expressed, however, some doubts on the subject, and +seemed to hesitate, the minister asked him if there were any doubts +about his being accepted. No, that was not the difficulty; but he +expressed a fear that it might not be altogether suitable, and he asked +whether, if he were once married, he could not (in case of unsuitability +and unhappiness) get _un_married. The clergyman assured him that it was +impossible; if he married, it must be for better and worse; that he +could not go back upon the step. So thus instructed he went away. After +a time he returned, and said he had made up his mind to try the +experiment, and he came and was married. Ere long he came back very +disconsolate, and declared it would not do at all; that he was quite +miserable, and begged to be unmarried. The minister assured him that was +out of the question, and urged him to put away the notion of anything so +absurd. The man insisted that the marriage could not hold good, for the +wife was "waur than the deevil." The minister demurred, saying that it +was quite impossible. "'Deed, sir," said the poor man, "the Bible tells +ye that if ye resist the deil he flees frae ye, but if ye resist her she +flees _at_ ye." + +A faithful minister of the gospel, being one day engaged in visiting +some members of his flock, came to the door of a house where his gentle +tapping could not be heard for the noise of contention within. After +waiting a little he opened the door, and walked in, saying, with an +authoritative voice, "I should like to know who is the head of this +house." "Weel, sir," said the husband and father, "if ye sit doun a wee, +we'll maybe be able to tell ye, for we're just trying to settle +that point." + +I have received from my kind correspondent, Rev. Mr. Hogg of Kirkmahoe, +the following most amusing account of a passage-at-arms between a +minister and "minister's man," both of them of the old school. The +minister of a parish in Dumfriesshire had a man who had long and +faithfully served at the manse. During the minister's absence, a +ploughing match came off in the district, and the man, feeling the old +spirit return with the force of former days, wished to enter the lists, +and go in for a prize, which he did, and gained the _fifth_ prize. The +minister, on his return home, and glancing at the local newspaper, saw +the report of the match, and the name of his own man in the prize-list. +Being of a crusty temper, he rang the bell in fury, and summoned John, +when the following colloquy took place:--"John, how is this? who gave +you leave to go to the ploughing-match?" "You were not at hame, sir." +"Well, you should have written to me." "I didn't think it was worth +while, sir, as we had our ain ploughing _forrit_[181]." "That may be; +but why were you not higher in the prize-list? I'm ashamed of you, and +you ought to be ashamed of yourself for being so far behind." John's +patience had given way, and, in his haste he burst forth, "Indeed, I'm +thinking, sir, that if ye were at a _preaching_ match, and +five-and-thirty in the field, ye wadna come in for _onything_, let a-be +for a fift'." + +Stories of humorous encounters between ministers and their hearers are +numerous, and though often seasoned with dry and caustic humour, they +never indicate appearance of bitterness or ill-feeling between the +parties. As an example, a clergyman thought his people were making +rather an unconscionable objection to his using a MS. in delivering his +sermon. They urged, "What gars ye tak up your bit papers to the pu'pit?" +He replied that it was best, for really he could not remember his +sermon, and must have his papers. "Weel, weel, minister, then dinna +expect that _we_ can remember them." + +Some of these encounters arise out of the old question of sleeping in +church. For example--"I see, James, that you tak a bit nap in the kirk," +said a minister to one of his people; "can ye no tak a mull with you? +and when you become heavy an extra pinch would keep you up." "Maybe it +wad," said James, "but pit you the sneeshin intil your sermon, minister, +and maybe that'll serve the same purpose." As a specimen of the +matter-of-fact view of religious questions frequently recorded of older +ministers, let me adduce a well-authenticated account of a minister in a +far up-hill parish in Deeside. Returning thanks one Sabbath for the +excellent harvest, he began as usual, "O Lord, we thank thee," etc., and +went on to mention its abundance, and its safe ingathering; but, feeling +anxious to be quite candid and scrupulously truthful, added, "all except +a few sma' bitties at Birse no worth o' mentioning." + +A Scotch preacher, a man of large stature, being sent to officiate one +Sunday at a country parish, was accommodated at night, in the manse, in +a very diminutive closet--the usual best bedroom, appropriated to +strangers, being otherwise occupied. "Is this the bedroom?" he said, +starting back in amazement. "'Deed ay, sir, this is the prophets' +chalmer." "It maun be for the _minor_ prophets, then," was the +quiet reply. + +Elders of the kirk, no doubt, frequently partook of the original and +humorous character of ministers and others, their contemporaries; and +amusing scenes must have passed, and good Scotch sayings been said, +where they were concerned. Dr. Chalmers used to repeat one of these +sayings of an elder with great delight. The Doctor associated with the +anecdote the name of Lady Glenorchy and the church which she endowed; +but I am assured that the person was Lady Elizabeth Cunninghame, sister +of Archibald, eleventh Earl of Eglinton, and wife of Sir John +Cunninghame, Bart., of Caprington, near Kilmarnock. It seems her +ladyship had, for some reason, taken offence at the proceedings of the +Caprington parochial authorities, and a result of which was that she +ceased putting her usual liberal offering into the plate at the door. +This had gone on for some time, till one of the elders, of less +forbearing character than the others, took his turn at the plate. Lady +Elizabeth as usual passed by without a contribution, but made a formal +courtsey to the elder at the plate, and sailed up the aisle. The good +man was determined not to let her pass so easily, so he quickly followed +her, and urged the remonstrance: "Gie us mair o' your siller and less o' +your mainners, my lady Betty." My kind correspondent, Rev. Mr. Agnew, +supplies me with an amusing pendant to this anecdote:--At a great church +meeting, Dr. Chalmers had told this story with much effect when Lord +Galloway was in the chair. After the meeting, Dr. Chalmers, and many +who had been present, dined at his lordship's hospitable table. After +dinner, when the morning meeting was discussed, Lord Galloway addressed +Dr. Chalmers on the subject of this story and, as if not quite pleased +at its being introduced, said, "Do you know, Doctor, the lady of whom +you told the story of the elder is a near relation of mine?" Dr. +Chalmers, with real or seeming simplicity, answered, "No, my Lord, I did +not; but next time I tell the story I can mention the fact." As a +pendant to the elder's disclaimer of "mainners" on the part of a lady of +rank, I may add an authentic anecdote of a very blunt and unpolished +Kincardineshire laird, expressing the same disclaimer of mainners on the +part of a servant, but in a far rougher form of speech. He had been +talking with a man who came to offer for his service as a butler. But +the laird soon found he was far too grand a gentleman for his service, +and became chafed with his requiring so many things as conditions of +coming; till, on his dismissal, when the man was bowing and scraping to +show how genteel he could be, he lost all patience, and roared out, "Get +out, ye fule; gie us nane o' your mainners here." + +Of an eccentric and eloquent professor and divine of a northern Scottish +university, there are numerous and extraordinary traditionary anecdotes. +I have received an account of some of these anecdotes from the kind +communication of an eminent Scottish clergyman, who was himself in early +days his frequent hearer. The stories told of the strange observations +and allusions which he introduced into his pulpit discourses almost +surpass belief. For many reasons, they are not suitable to the nature of +this publication, still less could they be tolerated in any pulpit +administration now, although familiar with his contemporaries. The +remarkable circumstance, however, connected with these eccentricities +was, that he introduced them with the utmost gravity, and oftentimes, +after he had delivered them, pursued his subject with great earnestness +and eloquence, as if he had said nothing uncommon. One saying of the +professor, however, _out_ of the pulpit, is too good to be omitted, and +may be recorded without violation of propriety. He happened to meet at +the house of a lawyer, whom he considered rather a man of _sharp_ +practice, and for whom he had no great favour, two of his own +parishioners. The lawyer jocularly and ungraciously put the question; +"Doctor, these are members of your flock; may I ask, do you look upon +them as white sheep or as black sheep?" "I don't know," answered the +professor drily, "whether they are black or white sheep, but I know that +if they are long here they are pretty sure to be fleeced." + +It was a pungent answer given by a Free Kirk member who had deserted his +colours and returned to the old faith. A short time after the +Disruption, the Free Church minister chanced to meet him who had then +left him and returned to the Established Church. The minister bluntly +accosted him--"Ay, man, John, an' ye've left us; what micht be your +reason for that? Did ye think it wasna a guid road we was gaun?" "Ou, I +daursay it was a guid eneuch road and a braw road; but, O minister, the +tolls were unco high." + +The following story I received from a member of the Penicuik +family:--Dr. Ritchie, who died minister of St. Andrews, Edinburgh, was, +when a young man, tutor to Sir G. Clerk and his brothers. Whilst with +them, the clergyman of the parish became unable, from infirmity and +illness, to do his duty, and Mr. Ritchie was appointed interim +assistant. He was an active young man, and during his residence in the +country had become fond of fishing, and was a good shot. When the +grouse-shooting came round, his pupils happened to be laid up with a +fever, so Mr. Ritchie had all the shooting to himself. One day he walked +over the moor so far that he became quite weary and footsore. On +returning home he went into a cottage, where the good woman received him +kindly, gave him water for his feet, and refreshment. In the course of +conversation, he told her he was acting as assistant minister of the +parish, and he explained how far he had travelled in pursuit of game, +how weary he was, and how completely knocked up he was. "Weel, sir, I +dinna doubt ye maun be sair travelled and tired wi' your walk." And then +she added, with sly reference to his profession, "'Deed, sir, I'm +thinkin' ye micht hae travelled frae Genesis to Revelation and no been +sae forfauchten[182]." + +Scotch people in general are, like this old woman, very jealous, as +might be expected, of ministers joining the sportsman to their pastoral +character. A proposal for the appointment of a minister to a particular +parish, who was known in the country as a capital shot, called forth a +rather neat Scottish _pun_, from an old woman of the parish, who +significantly observed, "'Deed, _Kilpaatrick_ would hae been a mair +appropriate place for him." _Paatrick_ is Scotch for partridge. + +I cannot do better in regard to the three following anecdotes of the +late Professor Gillespie of St. Andrews, than give them to my readers in +the words with which Dr. Lindsay Alexander kindly communicated them +to me. + +"In the _Cornhill Magazine_ for March 1860, in an article on Student +Life in Scotland, there is an anecdote of the late Professor Gillespie +of St. Andrews, which is told in such a way as to miss the point and +humour of the story. The correct version, as I have heard it from the +professor himself, is this: Having employed the village carpenter to put +a frame round a dial at the manse of Cults, where he was a minister, he +received from the man a bill to the following effect:--'To fencing the +_deil_, 5s. 6d.' 'When I paid him,' said the professor, 'I could not +help saying, John, this is rather more than I counted on; but I haven't +a word to say. I get somewhere about two hundred a year for fencing the +_deil_, and I'm afraid I don't do it half so effectually as +you've done.'" + +"Whilst I am writing, another of the many stories of the learned and +facetious professor rises in my mind. There was a worthy old woman at +Cults whose place in church was what is commonly called the Lateran; a +kind of small gallery at the top of the pulpit steps. She was a most +regular attender, but as regularly fell asleep during sermon, of which +fault the preacher had sometimes audible intimation. It was observed, +however, that though Janet always slept during her own pastor's +discourse, she could be attentive enough when she pleased, and +especially was she alert when some young preacher occupied the pulpit. A +little piqued, perhaps, at this, Mr. Gillespie said to her one day, +'Janet, I think you hardly behave very respectfully to your own minister +in one respect.' 'Me, sir!' exclaimed Janet, 'I wad like to see ony man, +no tae say woman, by yoursell, say that o' me! what can you mean, sir?' +'Weel, Janet, ye ken when I preach you're almost always fast asleep +before I've well given out my text; but when any of these young men from +St. Andrews preach for me, I see you never sleep a wink. Now, that's +what I call no using me as you should do.' 'Hoot, sir,' was the reply, +'is that a'? I'll sune tell you the reason o' that. When you preach, we +a' ken the word o' God's safe in your hands; but when thae young birkies +tak it in haun, my certie, but it taks us a' to look after them[183].' + +"I am tempted to subjoin another. In the Humanity Class, one day, a +youth who was rather fond of showing off his powers of language, +translated Hor. Od. iii., 3, 61, 62, somewhat thus:--'The fortunes of +Troy renascent under sorrowful omen shall be repeated with sad +catastrophe.' 'Catastrophe!' cried the professor. 'Catastrophe, Mr. +----, that's Greek. Give us it in plain English, if you please.' Thus +suddenly pulled down from his high horse, the student effected his +retreat with a rather lame and impotent version. 'Now,' said the +professor, his little sharp eyes twinkling with fun, 'that brings to my +recollection what once happened to a friend of mine, a minister in the +country. Being a scholarly man he was sometimes betrayed into the use of +words in the pulpit which the people were not likely to understand; but +being very conscientious, he never detected himself in this, without +pausing to give the meaning of the word he had used, and sometimes his +extempore explanations of very fine words were a little like what we +have just had from Mr. ----, rather too flat and commonplace. On one +occasion he allowed this very word 'catastrophe' to drop from him, on +which he immediately added, 'that, you know, my friends, means the _end_ +of a thing.' Next day, as he was riding through his parish, some +mischievous youth succeeded in fastening a bunch of furze to his +horse's tail--a trick which, had the animal been skittish, might have +exposed the worthy pastor's horsemanship to too severe a trial, but +which happily had no effect whatever on the sober-minded and respectable +quadruped which he bestrode. On, therefore, he quietly jogged, utterly +unconscious of the addition that had been made to his horse's caudal +region, until, as he was passing some cottages, he was arrested by the +shrill voice of an old woman exclaiming, 'Heh, sir! Heh, sir! there's a +whun-buss at your horse's catawstrophe!'" + +I have several times adverted to the subject of epigrams. A clever +impromptu of this class has been recorded as given by a judge's lady in +reply to one made by the witty Henry Erskine at a dinner party at Lord +Armadale's. When a bottle of claret was called for, port was brought in +by mistake. A second time claret was sent for, and a second time the +same mistake occurred. Henry Erskine addressed the host in an impromptu, +which was meant as a parody on the well-known Scottish song, "My +Jo, Janet"-- + + "Kind sir, it's for your courtesie + When I come here to dine, sir, + For the love ye bear to me, + Gie me the claret wine, sir." + +To which Mrs. Honeyman retorted-- + + "Drink the port, the claret's dear, + Erskine, Erskine; + Yell get fou on't, never fear, + My jo, Erskine." + +Some of my younger readers may not be familiar with the epigram of John +Home, author of the tragedy of "Douglas." The lines were great +favourites with Sir Walter Scott, who delighted in repeating them. Home +was very partial to claret, and could not bear port. He was exceedingly +indignant when the Government laid a tax upon claret, having previously +long connived at its introduction into Scotland under very mitigated +duties. He embodied his anger in the following epigram:-- + + "Firm and erect the Caledonian stood, + Old was his mutton, and his claret good; + 'Let him drink port,' an English statesman cried-- + He drank the poison, and his spirit died." + +There is a curious story traditionary in some families connected with +the nobleman who is the subject of it, which, I am assured, is true, and +further, that it has never yet appeared in print. The story is, +therefore, a "Scottish reminiscence," and, as such, deserves a place +here. The Earl of Lauderdale was so ill as to cause great alarm to his +friends, and perplexity to his physicians. One distressing symptom was a +total absence of sleep, and the medical men declared their opinion, that +without sleep being induced he could not recover. His son, a queer +eccentric-looking boy, who was considered not entirely right in his mind +but somewhat "_daft_" and who accordingly had had little attention paid +to his education, was sitting under the table, and cried out, "Sen' for +that preachin' man frae Livingstone, for faither aye sleeps in the +kirk." One of the doctors thought this hint worth attending to. The +experiment of "getting a minister till him" succeeded, and, sleep coming +on, he recovered. The Earl, out of gratitude for this benefit, took more +notice of his son, paid attention to his education, and that boy became +the Duke of Lauderdale, afterwards so famous or infamous in his +country's history. + +The following very amusing anecdote, although it belongs more properly +to the division on peculiarities of Scottish phraseology, I give in the +words of a correspondent who received it from the parties with whom it +originated. About twenty years ago, he was paying a visit to a cousin, +married to a Liverpool merchant of some standing. The husband had lately +had a visit from his aged father, who formerly followed the occupation +of farming in Stirlingshire, and who had probably never been out of +Scotland before in his life. The son, finding his father rather _de +trop_ in his office, one day persuaded him to cross the ferry over the +Mersey, and inspect the harvesting, then in full operation, on the +Cheshire side. On landing, he approached a young woman reaping with the +sickle in a field of oats, when the following dialogue ensued:-- + +_Farmer_.--Lassie, are yer aits muckle bookit[184] th' year? + +_Reaper_.--What say'n yo? + +_Farmer_.--I was speiring gif yer aits are muckle bookit th' year! + +_Reaper_ (in amazement).--I dunnot know what yo' say'n. + +_Farmer_ (in equal astonishment).--Gude--safe--us,--do ye no understaan +gude plain English?--are--yer--aits--muckle--bookit? + +Reaper decamps to her nearest companion, saying that was a madman, while +he shouted in great wrath, "They were naething else than a set o' +ignorant pock-puddings." + +An English tourist visited Arran, and being a keen disciple of Izaak +Walton, was arranging to have a day's good sport. Being told that the +cleg, or horse-fly, would suit his purpose admirably for lure, he +addressed himself to Christy, the Highland servant-girl:--"I say, my +girl, can you get me some horse-flies?" Christy looked stupid, and he +repeated his question. Finding that she did not yet comprehend him, he +exclaimed, "Why, girl, did you never see a horse-fly?" "Naa, sir," said +the girl, "but A wance saw a coo jump ower a preshipice." + +The following anecdote is highly illustrative of the thoroughly attached +old family serving-man. A correspondent sends it as told to him by an +old schoolfellow of Sir Walter Scott's at Fraser and Adam's class, +High School:-- + +One of the lairds of Abercairnie proposed _to go out_, on the occasion +of one of the risings for the Stuarts, in the '15 or '45--but this was +not with the will of his old serving-man, who, when Abercairnie was +pulling on his boots, preparing to go, overturned a kettle of boiling +water upon his legs, so as to disable him from joining his +friends--saying, "Tak that--let them fecht wha like; stay ye at hame and +be laird o' Abercairnie." + +A story illustrative of a union of polite courtesy with rough and +violent ebullition of temper common in the old Scottish character, is +well known in the Lothian family. William Henry, fourth Marquis of +Lothian, had for his guest at dinner an old countess to whom he wished +to show particular respect and attention[185]. After a very +complimentary reception, he put on his white gloves to hand her down +stairs, led her up to the upper end of the table, bowed, and retired to +his own place. This I am assured was the usual custom with the chief +lady guest by persons who themselves remember it. After all were seated, +the Marquis addressed the lady, "Madam, may I have the honour and +happiness of helping your ladyship to some fish?" But he got no answer, +for the poor woman was deaf as a post, and did not hear him. After a +pause, but still in the most courteous accents, "Madam, have I your +ladyship's permission to send you some fish?" Then a little quicker, "Is +your Ladyship inclined to take fish?" Very quick, and rather peremptory, +"Madam, do ye choice fish?" At last the thunder burst, to everybody's +consternation, with a loud thump on the table and stamp on the floor: +"Con--found ye, will ye have any fish?" I am afraid the exclamation +might have been even of a more pungent character. + +A correspondent has kindly enabled me to add a reminiscence and anecdote +of a type of Scottish character now nearly extinct.--I mean the old +Scottish _military_ officer of the wars of Holland and the Low +Countries. I give them in his own words:--"My father, the late Rev. Dr. +Bethune, minister of Dornoch, was on friendly terms with a fine old +soldier, the late Colonel Alexander Sutherland of Calmaly and Braegrudy, +in Sutherlandshire, who was lieutenant-colonel of the 'Local Militia,' +and who used occasionally, in his word of command, to break out with a +Gaelic phrase to the men, much to the amusement of bystanders. He called +his charger, a high-boned not overfed animal, Cadaver--a play upon +accents, for he was a good classical scholar, and fond of quoting the +Latin poets. But he had no relish nor respect for the 'Modern +languages,' particularly for that of our French neighbours, whom he +looked upon as 'hereditary' enemies! My father and the colonel were both +politicians, as well as scholars. Reading a newspaper article in his +presence one day, my father stopped short, handing the paper to him, and +said, 'Colonel, here is a _French_ quotation, which you can translate +better than I can,' 'No, sir!' said the colonel, 'I never learnt the +language of the scoundrels!!!' The colonel was known as 'Col. Sandy +Sutherland,' and the men always called him _Colonel Sandy_. He was a +splendid specimen of the hale veteran, with a stentorian voice, and the +last queue I remember to have seen." + +A correspondent kindly sends me from Aberdeenshire a humorous story, +very much of the same sort as that of Colonel Erskine's servant, who +considerately suggested to his master that "maybe an aith might relieve +him[186]." My correspondent heard the story from the late +Bishop Skinner. + +It was among the experiences of his father, Bishop _John_ Skinner. While +making some pastoral visits in the neighbourhood of the town (Aberdeen), +the Bishop took occasion to step into the cottage of two humble +parishioners, a man and his wife, who cultivated a little croft. No one +was within; but as the door was only on the latch, the Bishop knew that +the worthy couple could not be far distant. He therefore stepped in the +direction of the outhouses, and found them both in the barn winnowing +corn, in the primitive way, with "riddles," betwixt two open doors. On +the Bishop making his appearance, the honest man ceased his winnowing +operations, and in the gladness of his heart stepped briskly forward to +welcome his pastor; but in his haste he trod upon the rim of the riddle, +which rebounded with great force against one of his shins. The accident +made him suddenly pull up; and, instead of completing the reception, he +stood vigorously rubbing the injured limb; and, not daring in such a +venerable presence to give vent to the customary strong ejaculations, +kept twisting his face into all sorts of grimaces. As was natural, the +Bishop went forward, uttering the usual formulas of condolence and +sympathy, the patient, meanwhile, continuing his rubbings and his silent +but expressive contortions. At last Janet came to the rescue; and, +clapping the Bishop coaxingly on the back, said, "Noo, Bishop, jist gang +ye yir waas into the hoose, an' we'll follow fan he's had time to curse +a fyllie, an' I'se warran' he'll seen be weel eneuch!" + +The following might have been added as examples of the dry humorous +manner in which our countrymen and countrywomen sometimes treat matters +with which they have to deal, even when serious ones:-- + +An itinerant vendor of wood in Aberdeen having been asked how his wife +was, replied, "Oh, she's fine; I hae taen her tae Banchory;" and on it +being innocently remarked that the change of air would do her good, he +looked up, and, with a half smile, said, "Hoot, she's i' the kirk-yard." + +The well-known aversion of the Scotch to hearing _read_ sermons has +often led to amusing occurrences. One pastor, in a country district, who +was much respected by his people, but who, nevertheless, were never +quite reconciled to his _paper_ in the pulpit, found himself on one +occasion in an awkward predicament, from this same paper question. One +Sabbath afternoon, having exhausted both firstly and secondly, he came +to the termination of his discourse; but, unfortunately, the manuscript +was wanting. In vain efforts to seek the missing paper, he repeated +"thirdly and lastly" _ad nauseam_ to his hearers. At last one, cooler +than the others, rose, and nodding to the minister, observed, "'Deed, +sir, If I'm no mista'en, I saw 'thirdly and lastly' fa' ower the poopit +stairs;" evidently enjoying the disappearance of so important a part of +the obnoxious document. + +This prejudice was indeed some years since in Scotland quite inveterate. +The following anecdote has been kindly sent to me from _Memoirs of +Charles Young,_ lately published by his son:-- + +"I have a distinct recollection, one Sunday when I was living at Cults, +and when a stranger was officiating for Dr. Gillespie, observing that he +had not proceeded five minutes with his 'discourse,' before there was a +general commotion and stampedo. The exodus at last became so serious, +that, conceiving something to be wrong, probably a fire in the manse, I +caught the infection, and eagerly inquired of the first person I +encountered in the churchyard what was the matter, and was told, with an +expression of sovereign scorn and disgust--'Losh keep ye, young man! Hae +ye eyes, and see not? Hae ye ears, and hear not? _The man reads!_" + +On one occasion, however, even this prejudice gave way before the power +of the most eloquent preacher that Scotland ever heard, or perhaps that +the world ever heard. A shrewd old Fife hearer of sermons had been +objecting, in the usual exaggerated language, against reading sermons in +the pulpit. A gentleman urged the case of Dr. Chalmers, in defence of +the practice. He used his paper in preaching rigidly, and yet with what +an effect he read! All the objector could reply to this was, "Ah, but +it's _fell_[187] reading yon." + +The two following are from a correspondent who heard them told by the +late Dr. Barclay the anatomist, well known for his own dry +Scottish humour. + +A country laird, at his death, left his property in equal shares to his +two sons, who continued to live very amicably together for many years. +At length one said to the other, "Tam, we're gettin' auld now, you'll +tak a wife, and when I dee you'll get my share o' the grund." "Na, John, +you're the youngest and maist active, you'll tak a wife, and when I dee +you'll get my share." "Od," says John, "Tam, that's jist the way wi' you +when there's ony _fash or trouble_. The deevil a thing you'll do at a'." + +A country clergyman, who was not on the most friendly terms with one of +his heritors who resided in Stirling, and who had annoyed the minister +by delay in paying him his teinds (or tithe), found it necessary to make +the laird understand that his proportion of stipend must be paid so soon +as it became due. The payment came next term punctual to the time. When +the messenger was introduced to the minister, he asked who he was, +remarking that he thought he had seen him before. "I am the hangman of +Stirling, sir." "Oh, just so, take a seat till I write you a receipt." +It was evident that the laird had chosen this medium of communication +with the minister as an affront, and to show his spite. The minister, +however, turned the tables upon him, sending back an acknowledgment for +the payment in these terms:--"Received from Mr. ----, by the hands of +the hangman of Stirling, _his doer_[188], the sum of," etc. etc. + +The following story of pulpit criticism by a beadle used to be told, I +am assured, by the late Rev. Dr. Andrew Thomson:-- + +A clergyman in the country had a stranger preaching for him one day, and +meeting his beadle, he said to him, "Well, Saunders, how did you like +the sermon to-day?" "I watna, sir; it was rather ower plain and simple +for me. I like thae sermons best that jumbles the joodgment and +confoonds the sense. Od, sir, I never saw ane that could come up to +yoursell at that." + +The epithet "canny" has frequently been applied to our countrymen, not +in a severe or invidious spirit, but as indicating a due regard to +personal interest and safety. In the larger edition of Jamieson (see +edition of 1840) I find there are no fewer than eighteen meanings given +of this word. The following extract from a provincial paper, which has +been sent me, will furnish a good illustration. It is headed, the +"PROPERTY QUALIFICATION," and goes on--"Give a chartist a large estate, +and a copious supply of ready money, and you make a Conservative of him. +He can then see the other side of the moon, which he could never see +before. Once, a determined Radical in Scotland, named Davy Armstrong, +left his native village; and many years afterwards, an old fellow +grumbler met him, and commenced the old song. Davy shook his head. His +friend was astonished, and soon perceived that Davy was no longer a +grumbler, but a rank Tory. Wondering at the change, he was desirous of +knowing the reason. Davy quietly and laconically replied--'I've a coo +(cow) noo.'" + +But even still more "canny" was the eye to the main chance in an +Aberdonian fellow-countryman, communicated in the following pleasant +terms from a Nairn correspondent:--"I have just been reading your +delightful 'Reminiscences,' which has brought to my recollection a story +I used to hear my father tell. It was thus:--A countryman in a remote +part of Aberdeenshire having got a newly-coined sovereign in the days +when such a thing was seldom seen in his part of the country, went about +showing it to his friends and neighbours for the charge of one penny +each sight. Evil days, however, unfortunately overtook him, and he was +obliged to part with his loved coin. Soon after, a neighbour called on +him, and asked a sight of his sovereign, at the same time tendering a +penny. 'Ah, man,' says he, 'it's gane; but I'll lat ye see _the cloutie +it was rowt in_ for a bawbee.'" + +There was something very simple-minded in the manner in which a +parishioner announced his canny care for his supposed interests when he +became an elder of the kirk. The story is told of a man who had got +himself installed in the eldership, and, in consequence, had for some +time carried round the ladle for the collections. He had accepted the +office of elder because some wag had made him believe that the +remuneration was sixpence each Sunday, with a boll of meal at New Year's +Day. When the time arrived he claimed his meal, but was told he had been +hoaxed. "It may be sae wi' the meal," he said coolly, "but I took care +o' the saxpence mysell." + +There was a good deal both of the _pawky_ and the _canny_ in the +following anecdote, which I have from an honoured lady of the south of +Scotland:--"There was an old man who always rode a donkey to his work, +and tethered him while he worked on the roads, or whatever else it might +be. It was suggested to him by my grandfather that he was suspected of +putting it in to feed in the fields at other people's expense. 'Eh, +laird, I could never be tempted to do that, for my cuddy winna eat +onything but nettles and thristles.' One day my grandfather was riding +along the road, when he saw Andrew Leslie at work, and his donkey up to +the knees in one of his clover fields, feeding luxuriously. 'Hollo, +Andrew,' said he; 'I thought you told me your cuddy would eat nothing +but nettles and thistles.' 'Ay,' said he, 'but he misbehaved the day; he +nearly kicket me ower his head, sae I pat him in there just to +_punish_ him.'" + +There is a good deal of the same sort of simple character brought out in +the two following. They were sent to me from Golspie, and are original, +as they occurred in my correspondent's own experience. The one is a +capital illustration of thrift, the other of kind feeling for the +friendless, in the Highland character. I give the anecdotes in my +correspondent's own words:--A little boy, some twelve years of age, came +to me one day with the following message: "My mother wants a vomit from +you, sir, and she bade me say if it will not be strong enough, she will +send it back." "Oh, Mr. Begg," said a woman to me, for whom I was +weighing two grains of calomel for a child, "dinna be so mean wi' it; it +is for a poor faitherless bairn." + +The following, from a provincial paper, contains a very amusing +recognition of a return which one of the itinerant race considered +himself conscientiously bound to make to his clerical patron for an +alms: "A beggar, while on his rounds one day this week, called on a +clergyman (within two and a half miles of the Cross of Kilmarnock), who, +obeying the biblical injunction of clothing the naked, offered the +beggar an old top-coat. It was immediately rolled up, and the beggar, in +going away with it under his arm, thoughtfully (!) remarked, 'I'll hae +tae gie ye a day's _hearin_' for this na.'" + +The natural and self-complacent manner in which the following anecdote +brings out in the Highlander an innate sense of the superiority of +Celtic blood is highly characteristic:--A few years ago, when an English +family were visiting in the Highlands, their attention was directed to a +child crying; on their observing to the mother it was _cross_, she +exclaimed--"Na, na, it's nae cross, for we're baith true Hieland." + +The late Mr. Grahame of Garsock, in Strathearn, whose grandson now "is +laird himsel," used to tell, with great _unction_, some thirty years +ago, a story of a neighbour of his own of a still earlier generation, +Drummond of Keltie, who, as it seems, had employed an itinerant tailor +instead of a metropolitan artist. On one occasion a new pair of +inexpressibles had been made for the laird; they were so tight that, +after waxing hot and red in the attempt to try them on, he _let out_ +rather savagely at the tailor, who calmly assured him, "It's the fash'n; +it's jist the fash'n." "Eh, ye haveril, is it the fashion for them _no +to go on_?" + +An English gentleman writes to me--"We have all heard much of Scotch +caution, and I met once with an instance of it which I think is worth +recording, and which I tell as strictly original. About 1827, I fell +into conversation, on board of a Stirling steamer, with a well-dressed +middle-aged man, who told me he was a soldier of the 42d, going on +leave. He began to relate the campaigns he had gone through, and +mentioned having been at the siege of St. Sebastian.--'Ah! under Sir +Thomas Graham?' 'Yes, sir; he commanded there.' 'Well,' I said, merely +by way of carrying on the _crack_, 'and what do you think of _him_?' +Instead of answering, he scanned me several times from head to foot, +and from foot to head, and then said, in a tone of the most diplomatic +caution, 'Ye'll perhaps be of the name of Grah'm yersel, sir?' There +could hardly be a better example, either of the circumspection of a real +canny Scot, or of the lingering influence of the old patriarchal +feeling, by which 'A name, a word, makes clansmen vassals to +their lord.'" + +Now when we linger over these old stories, we seem to live at another +period, and in such reminiscences we converse with a generation +different from our own. Changes are still going on around us. They have +been going on for some time past. The changes are less striking as +society advances, and we find fewer alterations for us to notice. +Probably each generation will have less change to record than the +generation that preceded; still every one who is tolerably advanced in +life must feel that, comparing its beginning and its close, he has +witnessed two epochs, and that in advanced life he looks on a different +world from one which he can remember. To elucidate this fact has been my +present object, and in attempting this task I cannot but feel how +trifling and unsatisfactory my remarks must seem to many who have a more +enlarged and minute acquaintance with Scottish life and manners than I +have. But I shall be encouraged to hope for a favourable, or at least an +indulgent, sentence upon these Reminiscences, if to any of my readers I +shall have opened a fresh insight into the subject of social changes +amongst us. Many causes have their effect upon the habits and customs of +mankind, and of late years such causes have been greatly multiplied in +number and activity. In many persons, and in some who have not +altogether lost their national partialities, there is a general +tendency to merge Scottish usages and Scottish expressions into the +English forms, as being more correct and genteel. The facilities for +moving, not merely from place to place in our own country, but from one +country to another; the spread of knowledge and information by means of +periodical publications and newspapers; and the incredibly low prices at +which literary works are produced, must have great effects. Then there +is the improved taste in art, which, together with literature, has been +taken up by young men who, fifty, sixty, seventy years ago, or more, +would have known no such sources of interest, or indeed who would have +looked upon them as unmanly and effeminate. When first these pursuits +were taken up by our Scottish young men, they excited in the north much +amazement, and, I fear, contempt, as was evinced by a laird of the old +school, who, the first time he saw a young man at the pianoforte, asked, +with evident disgust, "Can the creature _sew_ ony?" evidently putting +the accomplishment of playing the pianoforte and the accomplishment of +the needle in the same category. + +The greater facility of producing books, prints, and other articles +which tend to the comfort and embellishment of domestic life, must have +considerable influence upon the habits and tastes of a people. I have +often thought how much effect might be traced to the single circumstance +of the cheap production of pianofortes. An increased facility of +procuring the means of acquaintance with good works of art and +literature acts both as cause and effect. A growing and improved taste +tends to stimulate the _production_ of the best works of art. These, in +return, foster and advance the power of forming a due _estimate_ of art. +In the higher department of music, for example, the cheap rate not only +of _hearing_ compositions of the first class, but of _possessing_ the +works of the most eminent composers, must have had influence upon +thousands. The principal oratorios of Handel may be purchased for as +many shillings each as they cost pounds years ago. Indeed, at that time +the very names of those immortal works were known only to a few who were +skilled to appreciate their high beauties. Now associations are formed +for practising and studying the choral works of the great masters. + +We might indeed adduce many more causes which seem to produce changes of +habits, tastes, and associations, amongst our people. For example, +families do not vegetate for years in one retired spot as they used to +do; young men are encouraged to attain accomplishments, and to have +other sources of interest than the field or the bottle. Every one knows, +or may know, everything that is going on through the whole world. There +is a tendency in mankind to lose all that is peculiar, and in nations to +part with all that distinguishes them from each other. We hear of +wonderful changes in habits and customs where change seemed impossible. +In India and Turkey even, peculiarities and prejudices are fading away +under the influence of time. Amongst ourselves, no doubt, one +circumstance tended greatly to call forth, and, as we may say, to +_develop_, the peculiar Scotch humour of which we speak--and that was +the familiarity of intercourse which took place between persons in +different positions of life. This extended even to an occasional +interchange of words between the minister and the members of his flock +during time of service. I have two anecdotes in illustration of this +fact, which I have reason to believe are quite authentic. In the church +of Banchory on Deeside, to which I have referred, a former minister +always preached without book, and being of an absent disposition, he +sometimes forgot the head of discourse on which he was engaged, and got +involved in confusion. On one occasion, being desirous of recalling to +his memory the division of his subject, he called out to one of his +elders, a farmer on the estate of Ley, "Bush (the name of his farm), +Bush, ye're sleeping." "Na, sir, I'm no sleeping--I'm listening." "Weel, +then, what had I begun to say?" "Oh, ye were saying so and so." This was +enough, and supplied the minister with the thread of his discourse; and +he went on. The other anecdote related to the parish of Cumbernauld, the +minister of which was at the time referred to noted for a very +disjointed and rambling style of preaching, without method or +connection. His principal heritor was the Lord Elphinstone of the time, +and unfortunately the minister and the peer were not on good terms, and +always ready to annoy each other by sharp sayings or otherwise. The +minister on one occasion had somewhat in this spirit called upon the +beadle to "wauken my Lord Elphinstone," upon which Lord Elphinstone +said, "I'm no sleeping, minister." "Indeed you were, my lord." He again +disclaimed the sleeping. So as a test the preacher asked him, "What I +had been saying last then?" "Oh, juist wauken Lord Elphinstone." "Ay, +but what did I say before that?" "Indeed," retorted Lord Elphinstone, +"I'll gie ye a guinea if ye'll tell that yersell, minister." We can +hardly imagine the _possibility_ of such scenes now taking place amongst +us in church. It seems as if all men were gradually approximating to a +common type or form in their manners and views of life; oddities are +sunk, prominences are rounded off, sharp features are polished, and all +things are becoming smooth and conventional. The remark, like the +effect, is general, and extends to other countries as well as to our +own. But as we have more recently parted with our peculiarities of +dialect, oddity, and eccentricity, it becomes the more amusing to mark +_our_ participation in this change, because a period of fifty years +shows here a greater contrast than the same period would show in many +other localities. + +I have already referred to a custom which prevailed in all the rural +parish churches, and which I remember in my early days at Fettercairn; +the custom I mean, now quite obsolete, of the minister, after +pronouncing the blessing, turning to the heritors, who always occupied +the front seats of the gallery, and making low bows to each family. +Another custom I recollect:--When the text had been given out, it was +usual for the elder branches of the congregation to hand about their +Bibles amongst the younger members, marking the place, and calling their +attention to the passage. During service another handing about was +frequent among the seniors, and that was a circulation of the +sneeshin-mull or snuff-box. Indeed, I have heard of the same practice in +an Episcopal church, and particularly in one case of an ordination, +where the bishop took his pinch of snuff, and handed the mull to go +round amongst the clergy assembled for the solemn occasion within the +altar-rails. + +Amongst Scottish reminiscences which do not extend beyond our own +recollections we may mention the disappearance of Trinity Church in +Edinburgh, which has taken place within the last quarter of a century. +It was founded by Mary of Gueldres, queen of James II. of Scotland, in +1446, and liberally endowed for a provost, prebendaries, choristers, +etc. It was never completed, but the portions built--viz., choir, +transept, and central tower--were amongst the finest specimens of later +Gothic work in Scotland. The pious founder had placed it at the east end +of what was then the North Loch. She chose her own church for the +resting-place of her remains as a sanctuary of safety and repose. A +railway parliamentary bill, however, overrides founder's intentions and +Episcopal consecrations. Where once stood the beautiful church of the +Holy Trinity, where once the "pealing organ" and the "full-voiced choir" +were daily heard "in service high and anthems clear"--where for 400 +years slept the ashes of a Scottish Queen--now resound the noise and +turmoil of a railway station. + +But we have another example of the uncertainty of all earthly concerns, +and one which supplies a Scottish reminiscence belonging to the last +seventy years. Wilhelmina, Viscountess Glenorchy, during her lifetime, +built and endowed a church for two ministers, who were provided with +very handsome incomes. She died 17th July 1786, and was buried on the +24th July, aged 44. Her interment took place, by her own direction, in +the church she had founded, immediately in front of the pulpit; and she +fixed upon that spot as a place of security and safety, where her mortal +remains might rest in peace till the morning of the resurrection. But +alas for the uncertainty of all earthly plans and projects for the +future!--the iron road came on its reckless course and swept the church +away. The site was required for the North British Railway, which passed +directly over the spot where Lady Glenorchy had been buried. Her remains +were accordingly disinterred 24th December 1844; and the trustees of the +church, not having yet erected a new one, deposited the body of their +foundress in the vaults beneath St. John's Episcopal Church, and after +resting there for fifteen years, they were, in 1859, removed to the +building which is now Lady Glenorchy's Church. + +In our reminiscences of many _changes_ which have taken place during +fifty years in Scottish manners, it might form an interesting section to +record some peculiarities which _remain_. I mean such peculiarities as +yet linger amongst us, and still mark a difference in some of our social +habits from those of England. Some Scottish usages die hard, and are +found still to supply amusement for southern visitors. To give a few +examples, persons still persist among us in calling the head of a +family, or the host, the _landlord_, although he never charged his +guests a halfpenny for the hospitality he exercises. In games, golf and +curling still continue to mark the national character--cricket was long +an exotic amongst us. In many of our educational institutions, however, +it seems now fairly to have taken root. We continue to call our +reception rooms "_public_ rooms," although never used for any but +domestic purposes. Military rank is attached to ladies, as we speak of +Mrs. Lieutenant Fraser, Mrs. Captain Scott, Mrs. Major Smith, Mrs. +Colonel Campbell. On the occasion of a death, we persist in sending +circular notices to all the relatives, whether they know of it or not--a +custom which, together with men wearing weepers at funeral solemnities, +is unknown in England[189]. Announcing a married lady's death under her +maiden name must seem strange to English ears--as, for example, we read +of the demise of Mrs. Jane Dickson, spouse of Thomas Morison. Scottish +cookery retains its ground, and hotch-potch, minced collops, sheep's +head singed, and occasionally haggis, are still marked peculiarities of +the Scottish table. These social differences linger amongst us. But +stronger points are worn away; eccentricities and oddities such as +existed once will not do now. One does not see why eccentricity should +be more developed in one age than in another, but we cannot avoid the +conclusion that the day for real oddities is no more. Professors of +colleges are those in whom one least expects oddity--grave and learned +characters; and yet such _have_ been in former times. We can scarcely +now imagine such professors as we read of in a past generation. Take the +case of no less distinguished a person than Adam Smith, author of the +_Wealth of Nations,_ who went about the streets talking and laughing to +himself in such a manner as to make the market women think he was +deranged; and he told of one himself who ejaculated, as he passed, +"Hech, sirs, and he is weel pat on, too!" expressing surprise that a +decided lunatic, who from his dress appeared to be a gentleman, should +be permitted to walk abroad unattended. Professors still have their +crotchets like other people; but we can scarcely conceive a professor of +our day coming out like Adam Smith, and making fishwives to pass such +observations on his demeanour. + +Peculiarities in a people's phraseology may prove more than we are aware +of, and may tend to illustrate circumstances of national _history_. Thus +many words which would be included by Englishmen under the general term +of Scotticisms, bear directly upon the question of a past intercourse +with France, and prove how close at one time must have been the +influence exercised upon general habits in Scotland by that intercourse. +Scoto-Gallic words were quite differently situated from French words and +phrases adopted in England. With us they proceeded from a real +admixture of the two _peoples_. With us they form the ordinary common +language of the country, and that was from a distant period moulded by +French. In England, the educated and upper classes of late years +_adopted_ French words and phrases. With us, some of our French +derivatives are growing obsolete as vulgar, and nearly all are passing +from fashionable society. In England, we find the French-adopted words +rather receiving accessions than going out of use. + +Examples of words such as we have referred to, as showing a French +influence and admixture, are familiar to many of my readers. I recollect +some of them in constant use amongst old-fashioned Scottish people, and +those terms, let it be remembered, are unknown in England. + +A leg of mutton was always, with old-fashioned Scotch people, a gigot +(Fr. gigot). + +The crystal jug or decanter in which water is placed upon the table, was +a caraff (Fr. carafe). + +Gooseberries were groserts, or grossarts (Fr. groseille). + +Partridges were pertricks,--a word much more formed upon the French +perdrix than the English partridge. + +The plate on which a joint or side-dish was placed upon the table was an +ashet (Fr. assiette). + +In the old streets of Edinburgh, where the houses are very high, and +where the inhabitants all live in flats, before the introduction of +soil-pipes there was no method of disposing of the foul water of the +household, except by throwing it out of the window into the street. This +operation, dangerous to those outside, was limited to certain hours, and +the well-known cry, which preceded the missile and warned the +passenger, was gardeloo! or, as Smollett writes it, gardy loo (Fr. garge +de l'eau). + +Anything troublesome or irksome used to be called, Scottice, fashions +(Fr. facheux, facheuse); to fash one's-self (Fr. se facher). + +The small cherry, both black and red, common in gardens, is in Scotland, +never in England, termed gean (Fr. guigne), from Guigne, in Picardy. + +The term _dambrod_, which has already supplied materials for a good +story, arises from adopting French terms into Scottish language, as dams +were the pieces with which the game of draughts was played (Fr. dammes). +Brod is board. + +A bedgown, or loose female upper garment, is still in many parts of +Scotland termed a jupe (Fr. jupe). + +In Kincardineshire the ashes of a blacksmith's furnace had the peculiar +name of smiddy-coom (Fr. ecume, i.e. dross). + +Oil, in common Scotch, used always to be ule,--as the uley pot, or uley +cruse (Fr. huile). + +Many of my readers are no doubt familiar with the notice taken of these +words by Lord Cockburn, and with the account which he gives of these +Scottish words derived from the French, probably during the time of +Queen Mary's minority, when French troops were quartered in Scotland. I +subjoin a more full list, for which I am indebted to a correspondent, +because the words still lingering amongst us are in themselves the best +REMINISCENCES of former days. + + Scotch. English. French. +Serviter Napkin From Serviette. +Gigot (of mutton) ... " Gigot. +Reeforts Radishes " Raiforts. +Grosserts Gooseberries " Groseilles. +Gardyveen Case for holding wine " Garde-vin. +Jupe Part of a woman's dress " Jupe. +Bonnaille A parting glass with a " Bon aller. + friend going on a journey +Gysard Person in a fancy dress " Guise. +Dambrod Draught-board " Dammes. +Pantufles Slippers " Pantoufles. +Haggis Hashed meat " Hachis. +Gou Taste, smell " Gout. +Hogue Tainted " Haut gout. +Grange Granary " Grange. +Mouter Miller's perquisite " Mouture. +Dour Obstinate " Dur. +Douce Mild " Doux. +Dorty Sulky " Durete. +Braw Fine " Brave. +Kimmer Gossip " Commere. +Jalouse Suspect " Jalouser. +Vizzy To aim at, to examine " Viser. +Ruckle Heap (of stones) " Recueil. +Gardy-loo (Notice well known in " Gardez-l'eau. + Edinburgh) +Dementit Out of patience, deranged " Dementir. +On my verity Assertion of truth " Verite. +By my certy Assertion of truth " Certes. +Aumrie Cupboard " Almoire, in old + French. +Walise Portmanteau " Valise. +Sucker Sugar " Sucre + +_Edinburgh Street Cry:_--"Neeps like sucker. Whae'll buy neeps?" +(turnips). + +Petticoat-tails Cakes of triangular shapes " Petits gatelles + (gateaux). +Ashet Meat-dish " Assiette. +Fashious Troublesome " Facheux. +Prush, Madame[190] Call to a cow to come " Approchez, + forward Madame + +I dwell the more minutely on this question of Scottish words, from the +conviction of their being so characteristic of Scottish humour, and +being so distinctive a feature of the older Scottish race. Take away our +Scottish phraseology, and we lose what is our specific distinction from +England. In these expressions, too, there is often a tenderness and +beauty as remarkable as the wit and humour. I have already spoken of the +phrase "Auld-lang-syne," and of other expressions of sentiment, which +may be compared in their Anglican and Scotch form. + +FOOTNOTES: + +[160] After all, the remark may not have been so absurd then as it +appears now. Burns had not been long dead, nor was he then so noted a +character as he is now. The Scotsmen might really have supposed a +Southerner unacquainted with the _fact_ of the poet's death. + +[161] Choice. + +[162] A vessel. + +[163] Juice. + +[164] Broth. + +[165] Rev. A.K.H. Boyd. + +[166] I believe the lady was Mrs. Murray Keith of Ravelston, with whom +Sir Walter had in early life much intercourse. + +[167] Disputing or bandying words backwards and forwards. + +[168] In Scotland the remains of the deceased person is called the +"corp." + +[169] Laudanum and calomel. + +[170] Read from the same book. + +[171] Sorely kept under by the turkey-cock. + +[172] Close the doors. The old woman was lying in a "box-bed." See _Life +of Robert Chambers_, p. 12. + +[173] Empty pocket. + +[174] A cough. + +[175] Shrivelled. + +[176] Confound. + +[177] Empty. + +[178] It was of this minister, Mr. Thom of Govan, that Sir Walter Scott +remarked "that he had demolished all his own chances of a Glasgow +benefice, by preaching before the town council from a text in Hosea, +'Ephraim's drink is sour.'" + +[179] Empty. + +[180] Basket for fish. + +[181] Well advanced. + +[182] Wearied. + +[183] I have abundant evidence to prove that a similar answer to that +which Dr. Alexander records to have been made to Mr. Gillespie has been +given on similar occasions by others. + +[184] Oats heavy in bulk. + +[185] This Marquis of Lothian was aide-de-camp to the Duke of Cumberland +at the battle of Culloden, who sullied his character as a soldier and a +nobleman by the cruelties which he exercised on the vanquished. + +[186] Sir H. Moncreiff's _Life of Dr. J. Erskine_. + +[187] Extraordinary. + +[188] In Scotland it is usual to term the law-agent or man of business +of any person his "doer." + +[189] And yet, even as we write, weepers seem to be passing into +reminiscence. + +[190] This expression was adopted apparently in ridicule of the French +applying the word "Madame" to a cow. + + + +CONCLUSION. + +I am very anxious to bear in mind throughout these Reminiscences, and to +keep in view the same feeling for my readers--viz. that such details +regarding the changes which many living have themselves noticed as +taking place in our customs and habits of society in Scotland, should +always suggest the question to the thoughtful and serious mind, Are the +changes which have been observed for _good_? Is the world a better world +than that which we can remember? On some important points changes have +been noticed in the upper classes of Scottish society, which +unquestionably _are_ improvements. For example, the greater attention +paid to observance of Sunday, and to attendance upon public +worship,--the partial disappearance of profane swearing and of excess in +drinking. But then the painful questions arise, Are such beneficial +changes _general_ through the whole body of our countrymen? may not the +vices and follies of one grade of society have found a refuge in those +that are of a lower class? may not new faults have taken their place +where older faults have been abandoned? Of this we are quite sure--no +lover of his country can fail to entertain the anxious wish, that the +change we noticed in regard to drinking and swearing were universal, and +that we had some evidence of its being extended through all classes of +society. We ought certainly to feel grateful when we reflect that, in +many instances which we have noticed, the ways and customs of society +are much improved in common sense, in decency, in delicacy, and +refinement. There are certain modes of life, certain expressions, +eccentricity of conduct, coarseness of speech, books, and plays, which +were in vogue amongst us, even fifty or sixty years ago, which would not +be tolerated in society at the present time. We cannot illustrate this +in a more satisfactory manner than by reference to the acknowledgment of +a very interesting and charming old lady, who died so lately as 1823. In +1821, Mrs. Keith of Ravelstone, grandaunt of Sir Walter Scott, thus +writes in returning to him the work of a female novelist which she had +borrowed from him out of curiosity, and to remind her of "auld lang +syne:"--"Is it not a very odd thing that I, an old woman of eighty and +upwards, sitting alone, feel myself ashamed to read a book which, sixty +years ago, I have heard read aloud for the amusement of large circles, +consisting of the first and most creditable society in London?" There +can be no doubt that at the time referred to by Mrs. Keith, Tristram +Shandy[191], Tom Jones, Humphrey Clinker, etc., were on the drawing-room +tables of ladies whose grandchildren or great-grandchildren never saw +them, or would not acknowledge it if they _had_ seen them. But authors +not inferior to Sterne, Fielding, or Smollett, are now popular, who, +with Charles Dickens, can describe scenes of human life with as much +force and humour, and yet in whose pages nothing will be found which +need offend the taste of the most refined, or shock the feelings of the +most pure. This is a change where there is also great improvement. It +indicates not merely a better moral perception in authors themselves, +but it is itself a homage to the improved spirit of the age. We will +hope that, with an improved exterior, there is improvement in society +_within_. If the feelings shrink from what is coarse in expression, we +may hope that vice has, in some sort, lost attraction. At any rate, from +what we discern around us we hope favourably for the general improvement +of mankind, and of our own beloved country in particular. If Scotland, +in parting with her rich and racy dialect, her odd and eccentric +characters, is to lose something in quaint humour and good stories, we +will hope she may grow and strengthen in _better_ things--good as those +are which she loses. However this may be, I feel quite assured that the +examples which I have now given, of Scottish expressions, Scottish modes +and habits of life, and Scottish anecdotes, which belong in a great +measure to the past, and yet which are remembered as having a place in +the present century, must carry conviction that great changes have taken +place in the Scottish social circle. There were some things belonging to +our country which we must all have desired should be changed. There were +others which we could only see changed with regret and sorrow. The hardy +and simple habits of Scotsmen of many past generations; their industry, +economy, and integrity, which made them take so high a place in the +estimation and the confidence of the people amongst whom they dwelt in +all countries of the world; the intelligence and superior education of +her mechanics and her peasantry, combined with a strict moral and +religious demeanour, fully justified the praise of Burns when he +described the humble though sublime piety of the "Cottar's Saturday +Night," and we can well appreciate the testimony which he bore to the +hallowed power and sacred influences of the devotional exercises of his +boyhood's home, when he penned the immortal words:-- + + "From scenes like these old Scotia's grandeur springs, + That makes her loved at home, revered abroad." + +On comparing Scotland past with Scotland present, we cannot evade the +question, Are "scenes like these"--devotional domestic scenes like +these--become less frequent than they were? Do they still hold their +place by the cottar's fireside, or are they becoming only a reminiscence +of what was _once_ a national distinction? Whatever be our religious +opinions, or whatever be our views on questions of ecclesiastical polity +and church order, no Scotsman who desires the happiness and honour of +his country could avoid a deep regret at the very idea of Burns' +"Cottar's Saturday Night" having become a thing of the past; and yet we +must not shrink from inquiry into the true state of the case. I have +asked the opinions of friends both of the Established and the Free +Church, who have met my inquiries in a fair and candid spirit, and, from +the answers I have received, have come to something like the following +conclusion:--I believe such scenes as Burns' "Cottar's Saturday Night" +are still to be met with in all their freshness and all their fervour in +the dwellings of a good religious peasantry; but in some places the +cottar population _itself_ has undergone a great change. Two causes have +combined to produce this effect:--An extensive system of emigration has +thinned the older families of the soil, whilst the practice of bringing +in mere labourers has in many districts made the old family domestic +firesides less numerous. Then, alas! alas! we fear cottar MORALITY has +not been such as to keep up the practice. Reports made to both the +General Assemblies of 1871 on this question were far from being +satisfactory. Dr. Begg, too, in his striking and able pamphlet on the +"Ecclesiastical and Social Evils of Scotland," refers to "symptoms of a +nation's degeneracy which seem multiplying in Scotland;" also to a +"growing amount of heathenism and drunkenness." + +With such representations before us regarding a decline of domestic +morality, we cannot expect to see much increase of domestic piety. +Burns, after he had become lowered in moral feelings by those licentious +habits and scenes into which he unfortunately fell after he had left his +father's house, was not hypocrite enough to profess the same love and +interest for the scenes of his innocent and early days. The country +clergy of Scotland have their many difficulties against which they are +to contend; and many obstacles which they have to meet. But let not the +domestic piety of the lowest cottages of the land be lost sight of. The +results of such worship are so blessed upon the inmates, that the +practice should everywhere be urged upon their flocks by the clergy, and +encouraged by all means in their power; and in that view it would, I +think, be desirable to circulate short forms of prayer for family use. +Many such have lately been published; and, whatever difference of +opinion may be entertained as to the comparative merits of extempore or +liturgical prayer for the public worship of the church, there can be no +question that in many instances a form must be very useful, and often +essential at the commencement, at least, of cottage worship. I have +known cases where it has been declined on the plea of inability to +conduct the service. + +There are numerous indications that, _on the whole_, a regard for +religion and religious ordinances is not losing ground in Scotland. The +great number of churches--and of handsome churches--that are springing +up, indicate, by their attendance, how much hold the subject has upon +the people. The ample funds raised for charitable and for missionary +objects give good testimony in the cause; and, in regard to the +immediate question before us, one favourable result may be reported on +this subject--the practice and feelings of domestic piety and family +worship have, at any rate, extended in Scotland in an _upward_ direction +of its social life. Beyond all doubt, we may say family worship is more +frequent, as a general practice, in houses of the rich, and also in the +houses of farmers and of superior operatives, than it was some years +ago. The Montrose anecdote about family prayers, told at page 64, could +hardly have place now, and indeed many persons could not understand +the point. + +I hope I am not blinded to the defects of my own countrymen, nor am I +determined to resist evidence of any deterioration which may be proved. +But I feel confident that Scotland still stands pre-eminent amongst the +nations for moral and religious qualities. The nucleus of her character +will bear comparison with any. We will cherish hope for the mental tone +of our countrymen being still in the ascendant, and still imbued with +those qualities that make a moral and religious people. We have reason +to know that in many departments of business, Scottish intelligence, +Scottish character, and Scottish services, are still decidedly at a +premium in the market. + +But now, before concluding, I am desirous of recording some +Reminiscences upon a phase of Scottish RELIGIOUS history which involves +very important consequences, and which I would not attempt to discuss +without serious consideration. Indeed I have sometimes shrunk from the +discussion at all, as leading to questions of so delicate a nature, and +as involving matters on which there are so many differences of opinion. +I refer to the state of our divisions and alienations of spirit _on +account_ of religion. + +The great Disruption, which nearly equally divided the National Church, +and which took place in 1843, is now become a matter of _reminiscence_. +Of those nearly connected with that movement, some were relatives of my +own, and many were friends. Unlike similar religious revolutions, that +which caused the Free Church of Scotland did not turn upon any +difference of opinion on matters either of doctrine or of ecclesiastical +polity. It arose entirely from differences regarding the relation +subsisting between the Church and the State, by which the Church was +established and endowed. The great evil of all such divisions, and the +real cause for regret, lie in the injury they inflict on the cause of +Christian unity and Christian love, and the separation they too often +make between those who ought to be united in spirit, and who have +hitherto been not unfrequently actually joined for years as companions +and friends. The tone which is adopted by publications, which are the +organs of various party opinions amongst us, show how keenly disputants, +once excited, will deal with each other. The differences consequent upon +the Disruption in the Scottish Church called forth great bitterness of +spirit and much mutual recrimination at the time. But it seems to me +that there are indications of a better spirit, and that there is more +tolerance and more forbearance on religious differences amongst Scottish +people generally. I cannot help thinking, however, that at no period of +our ecclesiastical annals was such language made use of, and even +against those of the highest place and authority in the Church, as we +have lately met with in the organs of the extreme Anglican Church party. +It is much to be regretted that earnest and zealous men should have +adopted such a style of discussing religious differences. I cannot help +thinking it is injurious to Christian feelings of love and Christian +kindness. It is really sometimes quite appalling. From the same quarter +I must expect myself severe handling for some of these pages, should +they fall into their way. We cannot but lament, however, when we find +such language used towards each other by those who are believers in a +common Bible, and who are followers and disciples of the same lowly +Saviour, and indeed frequently members of the same Church. Bigotry and +intolerance are not confined to one side or another. They break out +often where least expected. Differences, no doubt, will always exist on +many contested subjects, but I would earnestly pray that all SUCH +differences, amongst ourselves at least, as those which injure the +forbearance and gentleness of the Christian character, should become +"Scottish Reminiscences," whether they are called forth by the +opposition subsisting between Presbyterianism and Episcopacy, or whether +they arise amongst Presbyterians or amongst Episcopalians themselves. + +To my apprehension Scotland has recently seen a most painful indication +of the absence of that charity which, according to St. Paul, should +"never fail" amongst a Christian people. The act of two English +Prelates officiating in one of the Established churches has called forth +a storm of indignation as loud and vehement as if in a heathen land they +had fallen down before the image of a heathen deity, and worshipped in a +heathen temple. Then the explanation which has been given by apologists +for these services is not the least remarkable feature of the +transaction. These ministrations have been called "Mission Services," +and, in so far as I enter into the meaning of the phrase, I would +solemnly and seriously protest against its being made use of in such a +case. "_Mission service_" can only be applied to the case of a +missionary raising his voice "_in partibus infidelium_" or, to say the +least of it, in a land where no Christian church was already planted. +When I think of the piety, the Christian worth, and high character of so +many friends in the Established and other Presbyterian churches in +Scotland, I would again repeat my solemn protestation against such +religious intolerance, and again declare my conviction, that Englishmen +and Scotsmen, so far from looking out for points of difference and +grounds for separation on account of the principles on which their +Churches are established, should endeavour to make the bonds of +religious union as _close_ as possible. I can scarcely express the +gratification I felt on learning from the _Scotsman_, November 20, that +such were the sentiments called forth by this event in the mind of one +of the ablest and most distinguished Prelates of our day. In reference +to the Glengarry services, the Bishop of St. Andrews (Wordsworth) has +declared his opinion, that the "subsequent explanations of those +services seemed to mar the good work by introducing questions of +etiquette, where nothing should have been thought of but the simple +performance of Christian duty by Christian ministers for the benefit of +Christian people[192]." + +Such is the judgment expressed by the honoured and learned Bishop of St. +Andrews, whose noble and patriotic exertions to draw the Episcopalians +and the Presbyterians of Scotland closer together in bonds of religious +feelings and religious worship have been spoken of in such terms, and +such words have been applied to his labours in that cause, and to the +administration generally of his own diocese, by one of the very high +English Church papers, as have been to me a cause of deep sorrow and +poignant regret. + +As a Scotsman by descent from Presbyterians of high moral and religious +character, and as an Episcopalian by conscientious preference, I would +fain see more of harmony and of confidence between all Scotsmen, not +only as fellow-countrymen, but as fellow-Christians. When I first joined +the Episcopal Church the Edinburgh Episcopal clergy were on most +friendly terms with the leading clergy of the Established Church. Every +consideration was shown to them by such men as Bishop Sandford, Dr. +Morehead, Rev. Archibald Alison, Rev. Mr. Shannon, and others. There was +always service in the Episcopal chapels on the National Church communion +fast-days. No opposition or dislike to Episcopalian clergymen occupying +Presbyterian pulpits was ever avowed as a great principle. Charles +Simeon of Cambridge, and others of the Churches of England and Ireland, +frequently so officiated, and it was considered as natural and suitable. +The learning and high qualities of the Church of England's hierarchy, +were, with few exceptions, held in profound respect. Indeed, during the +last hundred years, and since the days when Episcopacy was attacked +under the term of "black prelacy," I can truly say, the Episcopal order +has received far more severe handling in Episcopal England than it has +received in Presbyterian Scotland. I must think, that in the case of two +churches where the grounds of _resemblance_ are on points of spiritual +importance affecting great truths and doctrines of salvation, and where +the points of _difference_ affect questions more of government and +external order than of salvation, there ought to be on both parts the +desire at least to draw as closely as they can the bonds of Christian +charity and mutual confidence. + +I believe it to be very painful to Scotsmen generally, whether of the +Established or the Episcopal Church, that the Presbyterian Church of +Scotland should be spoken of in such terms as have lately been made use +of. Scotsmen feel towards it as to the Church of the country established +by law, just as the Anglican Church is established in England. They feel +towards it as the Church whose ministrations are attended by our +gracious Sovereign when she resides in the northern portion of her +dominions, and in which public thanksgiving was offered to God in the +royal presence for her Majesty's recovery. But more important still, +they feel towards it as a church of which the members are behind no +other communion in the tone and standard of their moral principle and +integrity of conduct. They feel towards it as a church which has nobly +retained her adherence to the principles of the Reformation, and which +has been spared the humiliation of exhibiting any of her clergy +nominally members of a reformed church, and, at the same time, virtually +and at heart adherents to the opinions and practices of the Church of +Rome. English people, in speaking of the Established Church of +Scotland, seem to forget how much Episcopalians are mixed up with their +Presbyterian fellow-countrymen in promoting common charitable and +religious objects. For example, take my own experience: the +administration of a very valuable charitable institution called the +Paterson and Pape Fund, is vested jointly in the incumbent of St. +John's, Edinburgh (Episcopalian), and the two clergymen of St. +Cuthbert's (Established) Church. Even in matters affecting the interests +of our own Church we may find ourselves closely connected. Take the +administration of the late Miss Walker's will, and the carrying out her +munificent bequest to our Church, of which I am a trustee. Of the nine +trustees, two are Episcopalians residing in Scotland, one an +Episcopalian residing in England, and six are Presbyterians residing in +Scotland. The primary object of Miss Walker's settlement is to build and +endow, for divine service, a cathedral church in Edinburgh; the edifice +to cost not less than L40,000. The income arising from the remainder of +her property to be expended for the benefit of the Scottish Episcopal +Church generally. A meeting of trustees was held, November 25, 1871, and +one of the first steps unanimously agreed upon was to appoint the +Bishop-Coadjutor of Edinburgh, who is a trustee, to be chairman of the +meeting. There is no doubt or question of mutual good feeling in the +work, and that our Church feels full and entire confidence in the fair, +honourable, candid, and courteous conduct of the trustees to whom in +this case will be committed weighty matters connected with her +interests. + +At one of the congresses of the English Church it has been said, and +well said, by Mr. B. Hope, that he and his friends of the High Church +party would join as closely as they could with the members of the +Romish Church who have taken common cause with Dr. Dollinger, "looking +more to points where they agree, and not to points where they differ." +Why should not the same rule be adopted towards brethren who differ from +ourselves so little on points that are vital and eternal? The principle +which I would apply to the circumstances, I think, may be thus stated: I +would join with fellow-Christians in any good works or offices, either +of charity or religion, where I could do so without compromise of my own +principles. On such ground I do not see why we should not realise the +idea already suggested,--viz. that of having an interchange between our +pulpits and the pulpits of the Established and other Presbyterian or +Independent Churches. Such ministerial interchange need not affect the +question of _orders_, nor need it, in fact, touch many other questions +on which differences are concerned. + +Of course this should be arranged under due regulation, and with full +precaution taken that the questions discussed shall be confined to +points where there is agreement, and that points of difference should be +left quite in abeyance. Why should we, under proper arrangements, fail +to realise so graceful an exercise of Christian charity? Why should we +lose the many benefits favourable to the advancement of Christian unity +amongst us? An opportunity for practically putting this idea into a +tangible form has occurred from the circumstance of the new chapel in +the University of Glasgow being opened for service, to be conducted by +clergymen of various churches. I gladly avail myself of the opportunity +of testifying my grateful acknowledgments for the courteous and generous +conduct of Dr. Caird, in his efforts to put forward members of our +Church to conduct the services of the College chapel, and also of +expressing my admiration of the power and beauty of his remarks on +Christian unity and on brotherly love[193]. + +This is with me no new idea; no crude experiment proposed for the +occasion. I have before me a paper which I wrote some years since, and +which I had put into the shape of "An Address to the Bishops," to +sanction such exchange of pulpits, hoping to get some of my clerical +brethren to join in the object of the address. I feel assured much good +would, under God, be the result of such spiritual union. If +congregations would only unite in exchange of such friendly offices of +religious instruction with each other, how often would persons, now +strangers, become better acquainted! I wish the experiment could be +tried, were it only to show how prejudices would be removed; how +misunderstandings would be cleared away; how many better and kinder +feelings would grow out of the closer union on religious questions! Nay, +I would go farther, and express my full conviction, that my own Church +would _gain_ rather than lose in her interests under such a system. Men +would be more disposed to listen with attention, and examine with +candour the arguments we make use of in favour of our Church views. We +should gain more of the sympathy of our countrymen who differ from us, +by a calm expostulation than by bitter invective. Beautifully and wisely +was it written by a sacred pen nearly three thousand years ago, "A soft +answer turneth away wrath." + +I have such confidence in the excellence of my own Church, that I +believe to bring persons into closer and kinder connection with our +system would be the more likely way to gain their approval and their +favourable judgment. In nothing do we lose more of the confidence and +estimation of our fellow-countrymen than in the feeling of our being +intolerant and exclusive in our religious opinions. It is curious people +should not see that the arguments addressed in a friendly spirit must +tell more powerfully than the arguments of one who shows his +hostile feeling. + +With these feelings on the subject, it may be easily understood with +what pleasure I read, in the _Edinburgh Courant_ of November 10th, a +report of what our Primus (Bishop Eden) said, at the entertainment which +was given on the occasion of the consecration of St. Mary's Church, +Glasgow. In speaking on the question of Union, the Primus said-- + + "I think I may speak for my Episcopal brethren, when I say + that if the heads, especially of the Established Church of + Scotland--for that is the body that has most power and + influence--if a proposal were made by the leading men in that + Church, in concurrence with those who hold views similar to + themselves--a conference of the representative men of the + different Churches--to consider in a Christian spirit what + our differences are, and what are the points on which we are + agreed, we would be most happy to take part in it. Such a + conference might, in the providence of God, lead to our being + drawn nearer to each other. I believe that then the prayer + which the Bishop of St. Andrews offered up would he the + earlier accomplished, namely, that the Episcopal Churches + might become Reformed, and the Reformed Churches become + Episcopal. If any proposal of this kind could be made, I + believe we would be most ready to accept any invitation to + consider whether the various Churches might not be drawn + nearer to each other." (Great applause.) + +The Coadjutor Bishop of Edinburgh in his address, after briefly +referring to some proposals that had been made for union among the +churches in South Africa, went on to say-- + + "I do say, as one of the Bishops of the Scottish Episcopal + Church now, and in reference to what fell from the Primus, + that I most heartily concur in what he said, and I cannot but + feel that, without the slightest breach of the great + fundamental principles of the Church of Christ, there are + many points on which we may be at one with Christians who are + not part of our organic body. + + "I believe the proposal made by the Primus would have the + effect of drawing them nearer to us, and be a step forward to + that consummation which we all desire, and which our blessed + Lord prayed--with his last breath--'That we may all be one.'" + (Great applause.) + +That two honoured Fathers of our Church, our Primus and my own Bishop, +should have made use of such terms, and that their views should have +been received by _such_ an audience with so much applause, I could have +offered a grateful acknowledgment upon my knees. + +But after all, perhaps, it may be said this is an utopian idea, which, +in the present state of religious feelings and ecclesiastical +differences, never can be realised. It were a sufficient answer to the +charge of _utopianism_ brought against such a proposal, to plead that it +was no more than what was sanctioned by the teaching of God's word. In +this case it does not seem to go beyond the requirements of holy +Scripture as set forth in St. Paul's description of charity, and in +other passages which clearly enjoin Christians to act towards each other +in love, and to cultivate, so far as they can, a spirit of mutual +forbearance and of joint action in the sacred cause of preaching the +truth as it is in Jesus. I cannot believe that, were St. Paul on earth, +he would sanction the present state of jealous separation amongst +Christians. Take such separation in connection with the beautiful +sentiment, which we read in Phil. i. 18:--"What then? notwithstanding +every way, whether in pretence, or in truth, Christ is preached; and I +therein do rejoice, yea, and will rejoice." + +The determination to exclude preaching that is not strictly according to +our own forms seems to me quite inconsistent with the general teaching +of Scripture, more particularly with this apostolic declaration. But I +would bring this question to a practical issue, and we shall find enough +in our own experience to confirm the view I have taken, and to sanction +the arrangement I propose. To bring forward co-operation in the great +and vitally important work of preaching God's word, which has been +already effected between persons holding on some points opinions +different from each other, take first the case of revision of the +English translation of the Old and New Testament Scriptures, as it has +been resolved upon by the authorities of the great Anglican Communion. +They have had no difficulty in finding Nonconformist scholars and +divines whose fitness to be associated with Anglican Churchmen in the +great work of arranging and correcting an authorised version has been +admitted by all. Thus we have Nonconformists and English and Scottish +Episcopalians united in adjusting the terms of the sacred text;--the +text from which all preaching in the English tongue shall in future +derive its authority, and by which all its teaching shall in future be +guided and directed. There is _already_, however, a closer and a more +practical blending of minds on great religious questions much differing +from each other on lesser points. In the field of religious and +devotional literature, many of our church differences are lost sight of. +Episcopalian congregations are constantly in the habit of joining with +much cordiality and earnestness in singing hymns composed by authors +nonconformists with our Church--in fact, of adopting them into their +church service. These compositions form a portion of their worship, and +are employed to illustrate and enforce their own most earnest doctrinal +views and opinions themselves. How entirely are such compositions as the +sacramental hymn, "My God, and is thy table spread," by Doddridge; the +hymn, "When I behold the wondrous cross," by Isaac Watts, associated +with our Church services! Nor are such feelings of adoption confined to +poetical compositions. How many prose productions by non-Episcopalian +authors might be introduced for the delight and benefit of Christian +congregations! How eagerly many such compositions are read by members of +our Church! With what delight would many discourses of this class have +been listened to had they been delivered to Episcopalian congregations! +Where such hymns and such discourses are admissible, the _authors_ of +them might take a part in conducting psalmody and in occupying the +pulpit for preaching to a congregation. If the spirits of such writers +as Doddridge, Watts, and Hall, have been felt to permeate and to +influence the hearts of others who have heard or read their words of +holiness and peace, we may well suppose that God would sanction their +making like impressions, in his own house, upon the hearts of those whom +they meet there face to face. Might they not communicate personally what +they communicate through the press? For example, why should not Robert +Hall have preached his sermons on Infidelity and on the Death of the +Princess of Wales, perhaps the two most magnificent discourses in the +language, in an English Cathedral? Why should not the beautiful +astronomical discourses of Thomas Chalmers have been delivered in St. +Paul's or in St. John's, Edinburgh? For many years, in want of better +materials, the sermons of Dr. Blair were more used in the Church of +England, and more read in private, than any similar compositions. It has +been for years a growing persuasion in my own mind that principles of +Christian love and mutual harmony are too often sacrificed to the desire +of preserving the exact and formal marks of church order, as the Bishop +of St. Andrews so happily expressed it to preserve _etiquette_. Surely +the great law of Christian love would suggest and enforce a union at +least of spirit amongst Christian believers, who cannot join in the +unity of the same organisation. Inability to join in the same form of +church polity and church order need not shut the door to religious +sympathies and religious communion, where there are so many points of +agreement and of mutual interest. The experience of the past will tend +to produce the conviction that there has too often been in our religious +disputes a strong tendency in all Christian denominations to make the +great principle of love, which is a principle to rule in Heaven and for +eternity, actually subservient and subordinate to a system of +ecclesiastical order, which, important as it is for its own purposes and +objects, never can be more than a guide to the ministration of the +Church on earth, and an organisation which must be in its nature +confined to time. + +Wherever or whenever this feeling may be called forth, it is a grievous +error--it is a very serious subject for our reflection, how far such +want of sympathy and of union with those who do not belong immediately +to our own church, must generate a feeling hostile to a due reception of +an important article of our faith, termed in the Apostles' Creed the +COMMUNION OF SAINTS. According to the description given by the judicious +and learned Bishop Pearson, this communion or spiritual union belongs to +all who are in New Testament language denominated SAINTS; by which he +means all who, having been baptized in the faith, have this name by +being called and baptized. Then he states all Christian believers to +have communion and fellowship with these, whether living or dead. We +should feel towards such persons (evidently, as the good Bishop implies, +without reference to any particular church order) all sympathy and +kindness as members of the same great spiritual family on earth, +expectants of meeting in heaven in the presence of God and of the Lamb, +and of joining in the worship of saints and angels round the throne. I +have no hesitation in declaring my full conviction that such +expectations of future communion should supply a very powerful and +sacred motive for our cultivating all spiritual union in our power with +all fellow-Christians, all for whom Christ died. It becomes a very +serious subject for examination of our own hearts, how, by _refusing_ +any spiritual intercourse with Christians who are not strictly members +of our own Church, we may contravene this noble doctrine of the +Communion of Saints; for does not the bitterness with which sometimes we +find all union with certain fellow-Christians in the Church on earth +chill or check the feeling of a desire for union with the same in the +Church above? Nay, is there not matter for men's earnest thought, how +far the violent animosity displayed against the smallest approach to +anything like spiritual communion with all Christians of a different +Church from their own may chill the DESIRE itself for "meeting in the +Church above?" Can hatred to meeting on earth be in any sense a right +preliminary or preparation for desire to meet in Heaven? Nay, more, +should we not carefully guard lest the bitter displays we see of +religious hostility may even tend to bring men's minds towards a +_disinclination_ to meet in Heaven, of which the most terrible condition +was thus expressed by Southey:--"Earth could not hold us both, nor can +one heaven[194]." + +One mark of any particular Church being a portion of Christ's Church on +earth seems to be overlooked by some of our English friends, and that is +a mark pointed out by our Lord himself, when he said, "By their FRUITS +ye shall know them." By this announcement I would understand that +besides and beyond a profession of the great articles of the Christian +faith, I would, as a further criterion of a Christian church, inquire if +there were many of its members who have been distinguished for their +Christian piety, Christian learning, and Christian benevolence. Is all +external communion to be interdicted with a church which has produced +such men as we might name amongst the children of our Established and +other Churches in Scotland? Look back upon half-a-century, and ask if a +similar act with that of the Archbishop of York and Bishop of Winchester +would then have created a like feeling. I can remember well the interest +and admiration called forth by the eloquence, the philanthropy, and the +moral fervour of Dr. Chalmers, amongst the High Church school of the day +too--the good Archbiship Howley, Bishop Blomfield, Rev. Mr. Norris of +Hackney, Mr. Joshua Watson, etc. I remember, too, the perfect ovation he +received in the attendance of Archbishops, Bishops, Clergy, Peers, +Princes, etc., of the great London world, at his lectures on +Establishments. We can hardly imagine any one saying then, "This is all +very well, but the Church that produced this man is no part of the true +Church of Christ, and no English prelate or clergyman could possibly +take service in it." + +No one, I believe, who is acquainted with my own views and opinions on +religious subjects would say that I look with indifference on those +points wherein we differ from the great body of our fellow-countrymen. I +am confident that I should not gain in the estimation of Presbyterians +themselves by showing a cold indifference, or a lukewarm attachment, to +the principles and practice of my own Church. They would see that my own +convictions in favour of Episcopal government in the Church, and of +liturgical services in her worship, were quite compatible with the +fullest exercise of candour and forbearance towards the opinions of +others--I mean on questions not essential to salvation. + +I believe that there are persons amongst us coming round to this +opinion, and who are ready to believe that it is quite possible for +Christians to exercise very friendly mutual relations in spiritual +matters which constitute the essential articles of a common faith, +whilst they are in practice separated on points of ecclesiastical order +and of church government. I am old, and shall not see it; but I venture +to hope that, under the Divine blessing, the day will come when to +Scotsmen it will be a matter of reminiscence that Episcopalians, or that +Presbyterians of any denomination, should set the interests of their own +communion above the exercise of that charity that for a brother's faith +"hopeth all things and believeth all things." Zeal in promoting our own +Church views, and a determination to advance her interests and +efficiency, need be no impediment to cultivating the most friendly +feelings towards those who agree with us in matters which are essential +to salvation and who, in their differences from us, are, I am bound to +believe, as conscientious as myself. Such days will come. + +But now, to close my remarks on national peculiarities, with what I may +term a _practical_ and _personal_ application. We have in our later +pages adopted a more solemn and serious view of past reminiscences as +they bear upon questions connected with a profession of religion. It is +quite suitable then to recall the fact which applies individually to all +our readers. We shall ourselves each of us one day become subject to a +"reminiscence" of others. Indeed, the whole question at issue throughout +the work takes for granted what we must all have observed to be a very +favourite object with survivors--viz. that the characters of various +persons, as they pass away, will be always spoken of, and freely +discussed, by those who survive them. We recall the eccentric, and we +are amused with a remembrance of their eccentricities. We admire the +wise and dignified of the past. There are some who are recollected only +to be detested for their vices--some to be pitied for their weaknesses +and follies--some to be scorned for mean and selfish conduct. But there +are others whose memory is embalmed in tears of grateful recollection. +There are those whose generosity and whose kindness, whose winning +sympathy and noble disinterested virtues are never thought upon or ever +spoken of without calling forth a blessing. Might it not, therefore, be +good for us often to ask ourselves how _we_ are likely to be spoken of +when the grave has closed upon the intercourse between us and the +friends whom we leave behind? The thought might, at any rate, be useful +as an additional motive for kind and generous conduct to each other. And +then the inquiry would come home to each one in some such form as +this--"Within the circle of my family and friends--within the hearts of +those who have known me, and were connected with me in various social +relations--what will be the estimate formed of me when I am gone? What +will be the spontaneous impression produced by looking back on bygone +intercourses in life? Will past thought of me furnish the memory of +those who survive me with recollections that will be fond and pleasing?" +In one word, let each one ask himself (I speak to countrymen and +countrywomen), "Will _my_ name be associated with gentle and happy +'REMINISCENCES OF SCOTTISH LIFE AND CHARACTER'?" + +FOOTNOTES: + +[191] Sterne, in one of his letters, describes his reading Tristram +Shandy to his wife and daughter--his daughter copying from his +dictation, and Mrs. Sterne sitting by and listening whilst she worked. +In the life of Sterne, it is recorded that he used to carry about in his +pocket a volume of this same work, and read it aloud when he went into +company. Admirable reading for the church dignitary, the prebendary of +York! How well adapted to the hours of social intercourse with friends! +How fitted for domestic seclusion with his family! + +[192] _Scottish Guardian_, vol. ii. No. ix. p. 305. + +[193] "What is Religion?" a sermon by Rev. John Caird, D.D., Professor +of Divinity in the University of Glasgow, and one of Her Majesty's +Chaplains for Scotland. See especially concluding remarks. + +[194] See Southey's _Roderick_, book xxi. + + + + +INDEX. + +'Aaple,' bottle of beer strong o'. +Abercairney, Laird of, prevented from _going out_ in '15. +Aberdeen dialect, perfect specimens of. +Aberdeen elders, opinion of. +Aberdeen provost, wife of, at the opera. +Aberdeen, two ladies of, mutual recrimination. +'A bonnie bride's sune buskit.' +Accommodation, grand, for snuff. +'Acts o' Parliament lose their breath + before they get to Aberdeenshire.' +Adam, Dr., Latin translation of Scottish expressions. +Advice to a minister in talking to a ploughman. +'A gravesteen wad gie guid bree gin ye gied it plenty o' butter.' +'A hantle o' miscellawneous eating about a pig.' +Airth, housekeeper at, on king of France. +Alexander, Dr. W. Lindsay. +'And what the devil is it to you whether I have a liver or not?' +Anecdotes of quaint Scottish character. +Angel-worship is not allowed in the Church of Scotland. +Angler and the horse-fly. +'Anither gude Sunday! I dinna ken + whan I'll get thae drawers redd up.' +'Anither het day, Cornal.' +'An inch at the tap is worth twa at the boddam.' +'An I hadna been an idiot I micht hae been sleepin' too.' +Annals of the parish, extracts from. +Answer to stranger asking the way. +Answers, dry, specimens of. +'A peer o' anither tree.' +Appetite, farmer's reason for minister's good appetite. +Asher, minister of Inveraven, anecdote of. +Athole, Duke of, and Cultoquhey. +Athole, Duke of, answer of his cottar. +Auction, anecdote of spoon missing. +Auld lang syne, beauty of the expression. +Auld, Rev. Dr., of Ayr, and Rab Hamilton. +Authors, older ones indecent. +'Ay, ir ye a' up an' awa?' +'Ay, she may prosper, for she has baith the prayers of the good and + of the bad.' + +Baby, a laddie or a lassie. +Baird, Mrs., of Newbyth, remark of, as to her son in India. +Balnamoon, laird of, carriage to _haud in_. +Balnamoon, laird of, great drinker. +Balnamoon, laird of, joke with his servant. +Balnamoon, laird of, refuses his wig. +Balnamoon, praying and drinking at. +Banes, distinction of, by a beggar. +Banes, Frasers weel-baned. +Bannockburn, guide to, refusing an Englishman's five shillings. +Bannockburn, Scottish remark upon. +Baptism, minister and member of his flock. +Barclay of Ury, M. P., walk to London +Bathgate, mending the ways of +Beadle, equivocal compliment to minister's sermons +Beadle or Betheral, character of +Beast, a stumbling, at least honest +'Becky and I had a rippit, for which I desire to be humble' +Begg, Dr., on Scottish morality of the present day +Beggar, expressing his thanks to a clerical patron +Bellman of Craigie, notice from +Bestial, curious use of word +Betheral, a conceited one +Betheral criticising a clergyman +Betheral, criticism on a text +Betheral, evidence of, regarding drinking +Betheral, making love professionally +Betheral, on a dog that was noisy +Betheral, on the town bailies +Betheral, Scottish, answer to minister on being drunk +Betheral stories +Betheral taking a dog out of church +Betheral's answer to minister +Betherals, conversation of two, regarding their ministers +Blair, Rev. Dr. Hugh, and his beadle +Blessing by Scottish Bishops, form of, become a reminiscence +Blethering +Boatie, character on Deeside +Boatie of Deeside, and Providence +Books, older ones indecent +Border, _selvidge_, weakest bit of the wab +Bowing to heritors +Boy, anecdote of +Braxfield, Lord, a man of wit +Braxfield, Lord, character of, as a judge +Braxfield, Lord, conducting the trial of Muir, Palmer, and Skirving, etc. +Braxfield, Lord, delighted with reply of Scotch minister +Braxfield, Lord, spoke the broadest Scotch +Briggs, the sergeant, dry description of, by Scottish nobleman +Brougham, Lord, on Scottish dialect +Brown, Rev. John, and the auld wifie +Brown, Rev. John of Whitburn, answer to rude youth +Bruce, Mr., of Kinnaird, and Louis XVI. of France +Buccleuch, Duchess of, asking farmer to take cabbage +Bull, specimen of Scottish confusion of ideas +'Bulls of Bashan' applied by a lady to herself +Burnett, Dr. Gilbert, Bishop of Salisbury +Burnett, Sir Thomas, of Leys, and his tenant Drummy +Burnett, Lady, of Leys +Burns, a son of, and Charles Lamb +Burns conducted family worship +Burying-place, choice of +Bush, conversation with minister in church +Butler and Kincardineshire laird +'But my minnie dang, she did though' +'But oh, I'm sair hadden doun wi' the bubbly jock' +'But the bodies brew the braw drink' + +CAMPBELL of Combie and Miss M'Nabb, anecdote of +Campbell, Rev. Duncan, on Highland honours +Camstraddale, the Dumbartonshire laird +Canny, illustration of one of its meanings +Canterbury, Archbishop of, and the Dollar man +Carlyle, Dr., account of minister's drinking in last century +Carlyle, Dr., prosecuted by General Assembly for attending theatre +Carnegie, Miss Helen, of Craigo, anecdotes of +Carnegie, Miss, of Craigo, and James III. and VIII. +Carrier, a country, description of his journeys +Catastrophe, whimsical application of the word +'Cauld kail het again' +'Ceevil,' in courtship, may be carried too far +Cemeteries, treatment of, much changed +Chalmers, Dr., poor woman's reason for hearing +Chambers, Robert, _Domestic Annals of Scotland_. +Change of national language involves change of national character. +Changes, are they for the good of the whole community? +Changes, example of, in an old Laird seeing a man at the pianoforte. +Changes fast going on around us. +Changes in Scottish manners and dialect. +Changes, interesting to mark. +Changes taking place, here noticed. +Changes taking place in religious feeling. +Changes, various causes for. +Chaplain of a jail, humorous reasons for his appointment. +Children, curious answers of. +Children, very poor, examples of acuteness. +Children's diseases. +Church discipline in the Presbytery of Lanark. +Churches, a coachman's reason for their increase. +Churches, architect's idea of difference between two. +Churches, handsome structure of, more common. +Church discipline, old fashioned. +Church-going of late neglected in towns. +Church-going, Scotchmen not famous for, fifty years ago. +Churchyard, drunken weaver in. +Circuit, a drunken one. +Circuit, one described by Lord Cockburn. +Clergy, Gaelic, not judged severely on account of drinking. +Clergyman footsore in grouse-shooting. +Clergyman publicly rebuking his wife. +Clerk, John, address to presiding judge. +Clerk, John, answer to Lord Chancellor. +Clerk, John, apology for friend in Court of Session. +Cockburn, Lord, and the Bonaly shepherd. +Cockburn, Lord, on Scottish changes. +Cockburn's _Memorials_, extracts from. +Collie dogs, sagacity of. +'Come awa, Jeanie; here's a man swearin' awfully.' +'Come awa, granny, and gang hame; + this is a lang grace and nae meat.' +'Come oot and see a new star that + hasna got its tail cuttit aff yet.' +Confession of faith. +Confirmation, anecdotes concerning. +Constable, Thomas, anecdote of spare lady. +Conviviality, old Scottish, and forced. +Conviviality, Scotch, complaint of, by a London merchant. +Corb, and Sir George Ramsay. +Corehouse, Lord, prediction of not rising at the bar, by a Selkirk + writer. +'Corp's brither' at a funeral. +Cottar's Saturday night, fine picture. +Country minister and his wife, large bed. +Craigie, Rev. Mr., and Jamie Fleeman. +Craigmyle, Laird of, and Duchess of Gordon. +Cranstoun, George, Lord Corehouse. +Cream, Billy, landlord of inn at Laurencekirk, and Lord Dunmore. +Cross, curious meaning attached to. +'Cry a'thegither, that's the way to be served.' +Cumming, Dr. Patrick, convivial clergyman. +Cumming, Miss, of Altyre, and Donald MacQueen. +Cumnock, volunteers of. +Cultoquhey, old Laird of, morning litany. +Cutty-stool, former use of. + +Daft person, his choice of money. +Dale, David, anecdotes of his servant. +Dalhousie, Lady. +Dam-brod pattern table-cloth. +Dancing, seceder's opinion of. +Darkness, what is it? +Davie, chiel that's chained to. +Davy Gellatleys, many in the country. +Death, circumstances of, coolly treated. +Death of a sister described by old lady. +Decrees of God, answer of old woman. +Degrees sold at northern universities. +Delicacy of recent authors compared with older. +Dewar, David, Baptist minister at Dunfermline. +Dialects, distinctions on Scottish. +Dialect, Scottish, real examples of. +Dialects, provosts, Aberdeen and Edinburgh. +Diamond Beetle case. +Difference between an Episcopalian and a Presbyterian minister. +Diminutives, terms of endearment. +Discreet, curious use of word. +Diseases of children, odd names for. +'Div ye no ken there's aye maist sawn o' the best crap?' +Dochart, same as Macgregor. +Dog story. +'Doggie, doggie,' address of idiot to a greyhound. +Dogs in church, anecdotes of. +Donald, Highland servant. +Donkey, apology of his master for putting him into a field. +Downie, minister of Banchory, and son's marriage. +Drams in Highlands, anecdotes of. +Dream of idiot in town of Ayr, and apostle Peter. +Drinking, apology for. +Drinking at Balnamoon. +Drinking at Castle Grant. +Drinking, challenge against, by Mr. Boswell of Balmuto. +Drinking parties of Saturday sometimes took in Sunday. +Drinking party, 'lad employed to lowse the neckcloths.' +Drinking party, quantity consumed by. +Drinking reckoned an accomplishment. +Drinking, supposed manliness attached to. +Drovers drinking in Highlands. +Drumly, happy explanation of. +Drummond of Keltie, answer to itinerant tailor. +Dunbar, Sir Archibald, account of a servant. +Dundas, Henry, and Mr. Pitt. +Dundrennan, Lord, anecdote of a silly basket-woman. +Dunlop, Rev. Walter, address to Dr. Cook of St. Andrews. +Dunlop, Rev. Walter, and Mr. Clarke's big head. +Dunlop, Rev. Walter, man of racy humour. +Dunlop, Rev. Walter, meeting flock of geese. +Dunlop, Rev. Walter, on a taciturn brother. +Dunlop, Rev. Walter, and mischievous youths in kirk-yard. +Dunlop, Rev. Walter, answer to two young men. +Dunlop, Rev. Walter, opinion of Edward Irving. +Dunmore, Lord, and Billy Cream. +'D'ye think I dinna ken my ain groats in ither folk's kail?' + +East Lothian minister and his betheral taking degrees at a northern + college. +Economy, specimen of Scottish. +Edinburgh and Aberdeen provosts. +'E'ening brings a' hame,' expressed by Lord Byron. +Eglinton, Earl of, and little boy. +'Eh, man, your Psalm buik has been ill bund.' +'Eh, Miss Jeany! ye have been lang spared.' +Eldin, Lord (John Clerk), anecdotes of. +Election, answer of minister to question. +Elphinstone, Lord, and minister of Cumbernauld. +Endearment, Scottish terms of. +Englishman, an _impruived_. +Enterteening, curious use of word. +Episcopalian chapels, anecdote of Sir W. Forbes. +Erskine, Colonel, servant proposes an aith for his relief. +Erskine, Hon. Henry, dinner party at Lord Armadale's. +Erskine, Mr., of Dun, and his old servant. +Erskine of Dun, Miss. +Estate giving the name to proprietor. +Examinations of communicants +Expressions, old Scottish, and modern slang contrasted +Expressions, specimens of Scottish + +Factors, proposal to sow field with +'Fah tee, fah tee' +Fail, curious use of word +Family worship now more common +Family worship, remark upon +Farmer and servant boy +Farmer, answer of, when asked to take rhubarb tart +Farmer, cool answer regarding notes +Farmer on Deeside and bottle of vinegar +Farmer refusing a dessert spoon +Farmer, Scottish, conversation with English girl +Farms, giving names to the tenants +Fash as to taking a wife +Fast-day, national, strictness in observing +'Fat for should I gang to the opera just to creat a confeesion?' +Fencing tables, by an old minister +Fencing the _deil_ +Fergusson of Pitfour and London lady +Fettercairn, custom of bowing to heritors +Fife elder and penurious laird +Fife, Lord, proposal to, by an idiot +'Fin' a fardin' for yersell, puir body' +Finzean, Laird of, swearing +Fisher of men +Fit raiment, explanation of, by child +Fleeman, Jamie, anecdote of +Fleeman, Jamie, the Laird of Udny's fool, life of, published +'Floorish o' the surface,' to describe a preacher +Forbes, Mrs., of Medwyn, fond of tea +Forbes's banking-house, anecdotes of +'Formerly robbers, now thieves' +Frail, curious use of word +Fraser, Jamie, address to minister in kirk +Fraser, Jamie, idiot of Lunan +Free Church, road of, 'tolls unco high' +'Freet's dear! sin' I sauld freet in streets o' Aberdeen' +French people, a clause in their favour, by a Scottish minister +Fruit, abstinence from, by minister +Fullerton, Miss Nelly, anecdote of +Funeral, anecdote of, in Strathspey +Funeral, carrying at, or leaning +Funeral, extraordinary account of a Scottish, at Carluke +Funeral of a laird of Dundonald +Funeral, reason for a farmer taking another glass at +Funeral, reason for a person being officious at +Funeral, taking orders for, on deathbed +Funeral, the coffin forgotten at + +Galloway Lady declining drink +Gardenstone, Lord, and his book at the inn +Gardenstone, Lord, and his pet pig +Gardenstone, Lord, exertions of, for Laurencekirk +Gardenstone, Lord, keeping snuff in his waistcoat pocket +Gardenstone, Lord, personal reminiscences of +Garskadden, Laird of, 'steppit awa' at table +General Assembly, minister's prayer for +George III., sickness of, advantageous to candlemakers +Ghost appearing to Watty Dunlop +Gilchrist, Dr., answer to young minister on Lord's Prayer +Gilchrist, Dr., answer to one of his hearers, who had changed his + religion +Gillespie, Professor, and village carpenter +Gillespie, Rev. Mr., and old woman sleeping when he preached +Glasgow Cathedral, betheral's opinion of +Glasgow lady and carpenter +Glasgow, toast after dinner, hint to the ladies +Glenorchy, Lady, and the elder at the plate at Caprington +Glenorchy, Lady, removal of her remains on account of railroad +Gordon, Duchess of +Gordon, Duchess of, and the laird of Craigmyle +Gordon, Lady Susan, and David Tulloch +Graham, Miss Clementina Stirling, _Mystifications_ by +Grave, making love at +Gregory, Dr., story of Highland chief +Grieve in Aberdeenshire, opinion of own wife +Grieve, on Deeside, opinion of young man's preaching +'Gude coorse country work' +Gudewife on Deeside +Guthrie, Helen, and her husband +Guy Mannering, extract from + +HADDOCK, curious use of word +'Halbert, smells damnably of the' +Hamilton, Laird, at the palace asking the servant to sit down +Hamilton, Laird, noted for eccentricity +Hamilton, Laird, reasons for not signing a bill +Hamilton Rab, an idiot at Ayr +Hamilton, Rab, idiot, anecdotes of +Hangman, Scotch drover acting as +Harvest, returning thanks for good +Hatter at Laurencekirk +Heaven, little boy's refusal of +Heaven, old woman's idea of +'He bud tae big's dyke wi' the feal at fit o't' +He is awfu' 'supperstitious' +'He turned Seceder afore he dee'd, and I buried him like a beast' +'Hech, sirs, and he's weel pat on, too' +'Henny pig and green tea' +Heritor sending the hangman of Stirling to pay the minister +Heritors, bowing to +Hermand, Lord, great drinker, but first-rate lawyer +Hermand, Lord, jokes with young advocate +Hermand, Lord, opinion of drinking +Highland chairman +Highland chief, story of +Highland gentleman, first time in London +Highland honours +Highland inquisitiveness +Highlands kept up the custom of clans or races +Hill, Dr., Latin translation of Scottish expressions +His girn's waur than his bite +Holy communion, several anecdotes concerning +Home, John, author of Douglas, lines on port wine +Home, John, remark of, to David Hume +'Honest men and bonnie lassies' +'Honest woman, what garr'd ye steal your neighbour's tub?' +Honesty declared the best policy, why? +Honeyman's, Mrs., answer to Henry Erskine's impromptu lines +'Hoot! jabbering bodies, wha could understan' them?' +'Horse the length of Highgate' +Hospitals, changes in +Hot day, cool remark on +'Hout, that is a kind o' a feel' +Hume, David, refused assistance except on conditions +Hume, Mrs., 'Too poor' +Humour of Scotch language +Humour, Scottish, described in _Annals of the Parish_ +Humour, Scottish, description of +Hymns ancient and modern + +'I DIDNA ken ye were i' the toun' +Idiot boy and penurious uncle +Idiot boy, pathetic story of one receiving communion +Idiot in Lauder, cheating the seceders +Idiot in Peebles church +Idiot, musical one at Stirling, appropriate tune +Idiot of Lauder, and Lord Lauderdale's steward +Idiot, pathetic complaint of, regarding bubbly jock +Idiot, why not asleep in church +Idiots, Act of Parliament concerning +Idiots, fondness for attending funerals +Idiots, parish, often very shrewd +'I druve ye to your marriage, and I shall stay to drive ye to your burial' +'If there's an ill text in a' the Bible, + that creetur's aye sure to tak it.' +'If you dinna ken whan ye've a gude + servant, I ken whan I've a gude place.' +'I hae cuist'n my coat and waistcoat, + and faith I dinna ken how lang I + can thole my breeks.' +'I just fan' a doo in the _redd_ o' my plate.' +'I'll hang ye a' at the price.' +'I maun hae a lume that'll haud in.' +'I'm unco yuckie to hear a blaud o' your gab.' +Inch-byre banes. +'Indeed, sir, I wish I wur.' +India, St. Andrew's day kept in, by Scotchmen. +'I never big dykes till the tenants complain.' +Innes, Jock, remark upon hats and heads. +Innkeeper's bill, reason for being moderate. +Interchange of words between minister and flock in church. +Intercourse between classes changed. +'I soopit the pu'pit.' +'It's a peety but ye had been in Paradise, + and there micht na hae been ony faa'.' +'It's no the day to be speerin sic things.' +'I've a coo noo.' +'I was just stan'ing till the kirk had skailed.' +'I was not juist sae sune doited as some o' your Lordships.' +'I wouldna gie my single life for a' + the double anes I ever saw.' + +Jacobite feeling. +Jacobite lady, reason for not rising from her chair. +Jacobite toasts. +Jacobite's prayer for the _King_. +Jamie Layal, old servant, anecdotes of. +Jeems Robson, ye are sleepin'. +'Jemmy, you are drunk.' +Jock, daft, attending funeral at Wigtown. +Jock Grey, supposed original of David Gellatley. +Jock Wabster, 'deil gaes ower,' a proverb. +John Brown, burgher minister, and an 'auld wifie.' +John, eccentric servant, anecdotes of. +Johnstone, Miss, of Westerhall, specimen of fine old Scotch lady. +Johnstone, Rev. Dr., of Leith, and old woman, on the decrees of God. +Johnstone, Rev. Mr., of Monquhitter, and travelling piper. +Judges, Scottish, former peculiarities as a type. +Judges, Scottish, in Kay's Portraits. + +Kail, curious use of word. +Kames, Lord, a keen agriculturist. +Kames, Lord, his joke with Lord Monboddo. +'Kaming her husband's head.' +Kay's Portraits. +Keith, Mrs., of Ravelston, her remark to Sir W. Scott on old books. +Kilspindie, Laird of, and Tannachy Tulloch. +Kindly feelings between minister and people. +Kirkyard crack. +Kirkyard crack superseded by newspapers. + +Ladies of Montrose, anecdotes of. +Ladies, old, of Montrose. +Lady, old maiden, of Montrose, reason + for not subscribing to volunteer fund. +Lady, old, of Montrose, objections to + steam vessels, and gas, and water-carts. +Lady, old Scotch, remark on loss of her box. +Lady, Scottish, Lord Cockburn's account of. +Lady's, old, answer to her doctor. +Laird, parsimonious, and fool. +Laird, parsimonious, and plate at church-door. +Laird, reason against taking his son into the world. +Laird reproaches his brother for not taking a wife. +Laird, saving, picking up a farthing. +Laird, Scottish, delighted that Christmas had run away. +Lamb, Charles, saw no wit in Scotch people. +Land, differences of, in produce. +'Lass wi' the braw plaid, mind the puir.' +Laudamy and calomy' +Lauderdale, Duke of, and Williamson + the huntsman +Lauderdale, Earl of, recipe of his daft + son to make him sleep +Laurencekirk, change in +Laurencekirk described in style of + Thomas the Rhymer +Lawson, Rev. Dr. George, of Selkirk, + and the student +Leein' Gibbie +Leslie, Rev. Mr., and the smuggler +'Let her down Donald, man, for she's + drunk' +'Let the little ane gang to pray, but + first the big ane maun tak' an oar' +'Linties' and Scottish settler in + Canada +Linty offered as fee for baptism +Liston, Sir Robert, and Scotchmen + at Constantinople +Loch, Davie, the carrier, at his + mother's deathbed +Lockhart, Dr., of Glasgow, and his son + John +Logan, Laird of, speech at meeting of + heritors +'Lord be thankit, a' the bunkers are + fu'!' +'Lord pity the chiel that's chained to + our Davie' +Lord's prayer, John Skinner's reason + for its repetition +Lothian, Lord, in India, St. Andrew's + day +Lothian, Marquis of, and old countess + at table +Lothian, Marquis of, and workmen + +M'Cubbin, Scotch minister, witty + answer to Lord Braxfield +M'Knight, Dr., 'dry eneuch in the + pulpit' +M'Knight, Dr., folk tired of his sermon +M'Knight and Henry, twa toom kirks +M'Knight, Dr., remark on his harmony + of the four gospels +Macleod, Rev. Dr. Norman, and Highland + boatman +Macleod, Rev. Dr. Norman, and revivals +Macleod, Rev. Dr. Norman, anecdote + of an Australian told by +M'Lymont, John, the idiot, anecdotes + of +Macnab, Laird of, his horse and whip +MacNabb, Miss, and Campbell of Combie +M'Pherson, Joe, and his wife. +Magistrates of Wester Anstruther, + and evil-doers +'Mair o' your siller and less o' your + mainners, my Lady Betty' +'Ma new breeks were made oot o' the + auld curtains' +'Man, ye're skailing a' the water' +'Marriage is a blessing to a few, a + curse to many, and a great uncertainty + to all' +Marriage, old minister's address on +Mary of Gueldres, burying-place now + a railway +Mastiff, where turned into a greyhound +Maul, Mr., and the Laird of Skene +'May a puir body like me noo gie a + hoast?' +'Me, and Pitt, and Pitfour' +Mearns, Rev. W. of Kinneff +'Mem, winna ye tak the clock wi' ye?' +'Mending the ways o' Bathgate' +Mice consumed minister's sermon +Middens, example of attachment to +Military rank attached to ladies +Miligan, Dr., answer to a tired clergyman +Milton quoted +Minister and rhubarb tart +Minister, anecdote of little boy at + school +Minister asking who was head of the + house +Minister called to a new living +Minister, conversation with Janet his + parishioner +Minister in the north on long sermons +Minister on a dog barking in church +Minister preaching on the water-side + attacked by ants +Minister publicly censuring his + daughter +Minister reading his sermon +Minister returning thanks for good + harvest +Minister, Scottish, advice to young + preachers +Minister, Scottish, remark to a young + man, who pulled cards out of his + pocket in church +Minister, stupid, education and placing, +Minister, with 'great power of watter,' +Minister, young, apology for good appetite after preaching, +Minister's man, account of, +Minister's man, criticisms of his master's sermon, +Ministers, Scottish, a type of Scottish character, +Minister sending for his sermon in pulpit, +Minstrelsy of Scottish Border, Sir Walter Scott just in time to save, +Miss Miller (Countess of Mar) and Scottish Minister, +'Miss S----'s compliments, and she dee'd last nicht at aicht o'clock,' +Monboddo, Lord, anecdote in Court of King's Bench, +Monboddo, Lord, theory of primitive men having tails, +Monboddo, Lord, though a judge, did not sit on the bench, +Monboddo, Lord, visit at Oxford, +Money, love of, discussion on, +Montrose bailie's _eldest_ son, +Montrose, description of, by an Aberdeen lady, +Montrose lady's idea of man, +Montrose old ladies, +Montrose, provost of, conversation with an old maid, +'Mony a ane has complained o' _that_ hole,' +Muilton, Jock, idiot, and a penurious Laird, +Munrimmon Moor, no choice of wigs on, +Murray, Mrs., and the salt spoon, +'My mou's as big for puddin as it is for kail,' +_Mystifications_, by Miss Clementina Stirling Graham, + +Na, different modifications of the word, +'Na, na, he's no just deep, but he's drumly,' +'Na, na, ye'll aiblins bite me,' +'Neebour, wad ye sit a bit _wast?_' +Nelson, Lord, explanation of his order, +Nichol, an old servant of Forfarshire, +'No anither drap, neither het nor cauld, +Nobleman, half-witted, in Canongate jail, +Nobleman, mad Scottish, cautious answer of, +'Noo, Major, ye may tak our lives, but ye'll no tak our middens,' +Nuckle, Watty, betheral, opinion, + +'Od, Charlie Brown, what gars ye hae sic lang steps to your _front_ door?' +'Od, freend, ye hae had a lang spell on't sin' I left,' +'Od, ye're a lang lad; God gie ye grace,' +Old lady speaking of her own death, +Old sermons, preaching of, +Old woman, remarks of, on the usefulness of money, +'On the contrary, sir,' +'Ony dog micht soon become a greyhound by stopping here,' +'Oor Jean thinks a man perfect salvation,' +'Oor John swears awfu',' +Organ, mark of distinction, +Organs becoming more common, +'Ou, there's jist me and _anither_ lass,' + +Papers in pulpit, +Paradise and Wesleyan minister, +Parishioner, coolness of, when made an elder of the kirk, +Paul, Dr., his anecdotes of idiots, +Paul, Saunders, of Banchory, famous for drinking, +Perth, Lady, remark to a Frenchman on French cookery, +Penurious laird and Fife elder, +Pestilence that walketh in darkness--What is it? +Phraseology, Scottish, an example of pure, +Phraseology, Scottish, force of, +Piccadilly, +Pig, great broon, +Pig, Scotch minister's account of eating one, +Pinkieburn, faithful servant at, +Piper and the elder, +Piper and the wolves, +Plugging, an odious practice, +Poetry, Scottish, becoming less popular, +Poetry in Scottish dialect, list of, +Polkemmet, Lord, account of his judicial preparations, +Polkemmet, Lord, his account of killing a calf, +Pompous minister and the angler, +Pony of Free Kirk minister running off to glebe, +Poole, Dr., his patient's death announced, +'Powny, grippit a chiel for,' +Prayers before battle, +Preacher, a bombastic, reproved satirically, +Preacher, Scottish, and his small bedroom at manse where he visited, +Preacher, testimony to a good, +Preaching old sermons, +Precentor reading single line of psalm, +Predestination, answer of minister about, +Priest Gordon, genuine Aberdonian specimen of, +Priest Matheson, +Professor, a reverend, his answer to a lawyer, +Pronunciation, Scottish, varieties of, make four different meanings, +Property qualification, +Prophets' chalmer (the minor), +Proprietors, two, meeting of, described by Sir Walter Scott, +Proverbial expressions, examples of some very pithy, +Proverbial Philosophy of Scotland, by William Stirling of Keir, M.P., +Proverb, Scottish, application of, by a minister in a storm, +Proverb, Scottish, expressed by Lord Byron, +Proverbs becoming _reminiscences_, +Proverbs, immense collection of, by Fergusson, +Proverbs, Scotch, some specially applicable to the Deil, +Proverbs, Scotland famous for, +Proverbs, Scottish, Allan Ramsay's dedication of, +Proverbs, Scottish, Andrew Henderson, +Proverbs, Scottish, collections of, +Proverbs, Scottish, collection of, by Allan Ramsay, +Proverbs, Scottish, Kelly's collection, +Proverbs, Scottish, much used in former times, +Proverbs, Scottish, pretty application of, +Proverbs, Scottish, specimens of, in language almost obsolete, +Providence, +Providence, mistake of, in regard to bairns, +Provost of Edinburgh in the House of Lords in 1736, +Psalmody, Scottish, +Psalmody, Scottish, improvement of, +Pure language of Scotland not to be regarded as a provincial dialect, + +'Raiment fit,' +Ramsay, Allan, dedication of his proverbs in prose, +Ramsay, Sir George, of Banff, and the Laird of Corb, +Ramsay, two Misses, of Balmain, anecdotes of, +'Rax me a spaul o' that bubbly jock, +Reason given by an old man for marrying a young woman, +Recess Studies, +Redd, pigeon found among, +Religion, two great changes in ideas of, +Religious feelings and religious observances, +'Remember Mr. Tamson; no him at the Green, but oor ain Mr. Tamson, +'Reminiscences' capable of a practical application, +'Reminiscences' have called forth communications from others, +'Reminiscences' includes stories of wit or humour, +'Reminiscences,' object and purpose of, +'Reminiscences,' recall pleasant associations, +'Ripin' the ribs,' +Road, Highland, humorously described, +Robbie A'Thing, +Robby, a young dandy, and his old aunt, +Robertson, Principal, advice to, by Scotch minister, +Robison, Mrs., answer to gentleman coming to dinner, +Rockville, Lord, character of, as a judge, +Rockville, Lord, description of street, when tipsy, +Ruling elder's answer to jokes of three young men, +Rutherfurd, Lord, and the Bonaly shepherd, + +Sabbath-day, and redding up drawers. +Sabbath-day, eggs ought not to be laid on. +Sabbath-day known by a hare. +Sabbath day, where children go who play marbles on. +Sabbath desecration, geologist in the Highlands. +Sabbath desecration, stopping the jack for. +Sandy, fine specimen of old servant. +'Sayawa', sir; we're a' sittin' to cheat the dowgs.' +Scotchman, notion of things in London. +Scotchman of the old school, judgment of, upon an Englishman. +Scotchman on losing his wife and cow. +Scotch minister and his diary regarding quarrels with wife. +Scott, Dr., minister of Carluke. +Scott, Dr., on his parishioners dancing. +Scott, Rev. Robert, his idea of Nelson's order. +Scott, Rev. R., of Cranwell, anecdote of young carpenter. +Scott, Sir Walter, and the blacksmith on the battle of Flodden. +Scott, Sir Walter, did not write poetry in Scottish dialect. +Scott, Sir Walter, his story of sale of antiques. +Scott, Sir Walter, his story of two relatives who joined the Pretender. +Scott, Sir Walter, just in time to save Minstrelsy of the Border. +Scotland, past and present. +Scotticisms, expressive, pointed, and pithy. +Scotticisms, remarks on, by Sir John Sinclair and Dr. Beattie. +Scottish architect on English leases. +Scottish boy cleverness. +Scottish conviviality, old. +Scottish cookery. +Scottish dialect, difference between Aberdeen and Southern Scotch. +Scottish dialect, reference of, to English. +Scottish dialect, specimens of. +Scottish economy, specimen of, in London. +Scottish elders and ministers, anecdotes of. +Scottish expressions, examples of peculiar applications. +Scottish expressions, illustrated by a letter to a young married lady + from an old aunt. +Scottish gentleman in London. +Scottish humour and Scottish wit. +Scottish humour, specimen of, in a Fife lass. +Scottish minstrelsy. +Scottish music, charm of. +Scottish peasantry, character of. +Scottish peasantry, religious feelings of. +Scottish peasantry, religious feelings of, changed. +Scottish phraseology, articles on, in _Blackwood_. +Scottish psalm-tunes, some written by operatives. +Scottish shepherd and Lord Cockburn. +Scottish shepherd and Lord Rutherford. +Scottish songs, collections of. +Scottish stories of wit and humour. +Scottish verses, charm of. +Scottish words of French derivation. +_Scottishness_ of the national humour. +Seceder, an old, would not enter parish church. +Secession Church, professor in, to a young student. +Sedan chairs. +Sermon consumed by mice. +Sermons, change of character of. +Servant and dog Pickle at Yester. +Servant, answer of, to his irascible master. +Servant, answer of, when told to go. +Servant and Lord Lothian. +Servant, Mrs. Murray, and the spoon. +Servant of Mrs. Ferguson of Pitfour. +Servant of Mrs. Fullerton of Montrose. +Servant, old, reason for doing as he liked. +Servant praying for her minister. +Servant taxed with being drunk, his answer. +Servants, domestic Scottish. +'She juist felled hersel at Graigo wi' straeberries and 'ream.' +'She's bonnier than she's better.' +'She will be near me to close my een.' +Shireff, Rev. Mr., and member of his church who had left him. +Shirra, Rev. Mr., on David saying 'All men are liars.' +Shot, a bad one, complimented on success. +Siddons, Mrs., respected by Edinburgh clergy. +Silly, curious use of the word. +Singing birds, absence of, in America. +Sins, Aberdeen mother proud of. +'_Sir, baby_ I'll come farther.' +'Sit in a box drawn by brutes.' +Skinner, Bishop, and Aberdeen old couple. +Skinner, John, Jacobitism of. +Skinner, John, of Langside, his defence of prayer-book. +Skinner, Rev. John, author of several Scottish songs. +Skinner, Rev. John, lines on his grandson leaving Montrose. +Skinner, Rev. John, passing an Anti-burgher chapel. +Sleeping in church. +Sleeping in church, and snuffing. +Slockin'd, never, apology for drinking. +Smith, Adam, marked as most eccentric. +Smith, Sydney, opinion of Scottish wit. +Smuggler, case of one in church. +'Sneck the door.' +Snuff-box handed round in churches. +Snuff, grand _accommodation_ for. +Snuff, pu'pit soopit for. +Snuff put into the sermon. +Snuff-taking. +Soldier, an old, of the 42d, cautious about the name of Graham. +'Some fowk like parritch, and some like paddocks.' +'Some strong o' the aaple.' +Songs, drinking. +Sovereign, when new, a curiosity. +Speat o' praying and speat o' drinking. +Speir, daft Will, and Earl of Eglinton. +Speir, daft Will, answer to master about his dinner. +Spinster, elderly, arch reply to, by a younger member. +Stipend, minister's, reasons against its being large. +Stirling of Keir, evidence in favour of, by the miller of Keir. +Stirling of Keir, lecture on proverbs. +Stra'von, wife's desire to be buried in. +Strikes, answer upon, by a master. +Stewart, Rev. Patrick, sermon consumed by mice. +Stone removed out of the way. +Stool, a three-legged, thrown at husband by wife. +Stout lady, remark of. +Stranraer, old ladies on the British victories over the French. +Sunday sometimes included in Saturday's drinking party. +Suppers once prevalent in Scotland. +Sutherland, Colonel Sandy, his dislike to the French. +Swearing by Laird of Finzean. +Swearing by Perth writer. +Swearing common in Scotland formerly. +Swine, dislike of, in Scotland. +Swinophobia, reasons for. +Smith, Sydney, remarks of, on _men_ not at church. + +Tailor, apology for his clothes not fitting. +'Take out that dog; he'd wauken a Glasgow magistrate.' +Taylor, Mr., of London, description of his theatre by his father from + Aberdeen. +Term-time offensive to Scottish lairds. +Texts, remarks upon. +'That's a lee, Jemmie.' +Theatre, clergy used to attend, in 1784. +Theatre, clerical non-attendance. +'The breet's stannin' i' the peel wi ma.' +'The deil a ane shall pray for _them_ on _my_ plaid.' +The fool and the miller. +'The man reads.' +'Them 'at drink by themsells may just fish by themsells.' +'There'll be a walth o' images there.' +'There's Kinnaird greetin' as if there was nae a saunt on earth but + himself and the King o' France. +'There's nae _wail_ o' wigs on Munrimmon Moor,' +'There's neither men nor meesie, and fat care I for meat?' +'They may pray the kenees aff their breeks afore I join in that prayer,' +'They neither said ba nor bum,' +'Thirdly and lastly' fell over the pulpit stairs, +Thomson, Thomas, described in Aberdeen dialect, +Thomson, two of the name prayed for, +Thrift, examples of, in medicine, +Tibbie, eccentric servant, anecdote of, +Tiger and 'skate, stories of, +Toasts after dinner, +Toasts, collection of, in the book 'The Gentleman's New Bottle Companion,' +Toasts or sentiments, specimens of, +Tourist, English, asking Scottish girl for horse-flies, +Town-Council, 'profit but not honour,' +Tractarianism, idea of, by an old Presbyterian, +'Travel from Genesis to Revelation, and not footsore,' +Traveller's story, treatment of, +'Troth, mem, they're just the gudeman's _deed_ claes,' +Tulloch, David, Jacobite anecdote of, at prayers, +Turkey leg, devilled, and servant, +Tweeddale, Lord, and dog Pickle, + +Unbeliever described by Scotch lady, + +View of things, Scottish matter of fact, +Vomit, if not strong enough, to be returned, + +Washing dishes on the Sabbath day, +Waverley, old lady discovering the author of, +Waverley quoted, +Webster, Rev. Dr., a five-bottle man, +'Weel then, neist time they sail get _nane ava_,' +'We'll stop now, bairns; I'm no enterteened,' +'We never absolve _till after three several appearances_,' +West, going, ridiculous application of +'Wha' are thae twa _beddle-looking_ bodies?' +'What a nicht for me to be fleein through the air,' +'What ails ye at her wi' the green gown?' +'What gars the laird of Garskadden look sae gash?' +'What is the chief end of man?' +'When ye get cheenge for a saxpence here, it's soon slippit awa,' +Whisky, limited blame of, +'Whited sepulchres,' applied to clergy in surplices, Inverness, +Wife, cool opinion of, by husband, +Wife, rebuke of, by minister, +Wife taken by her husband to Banchory, +Wig of professor in Secession Church, +Williamson the huntsman and Duke of Lauderdale, +'Will ye tak your haddock wi' us the day?' +Wilson, Scottish vocalist, modesty of, +Wind, Scotch minister's prayer for, +Wolves and the piper, +Wool, modifications of, + +'Ye a' speak sae _genteel_ now that I dinna ken wha's Scotch,' +Yeddie, daft, remark on a club-foot, +'Ye should hae steekit your neive upo' that,' +'Ye've been lang Cook, Cooking them, but ye've dished them at last,' +Young man and cards in church, +'Your hospitality borders upon brutality,' + + + +***END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK REMINISCENCES OF SCOTTISH LIFE AND +CHARACTER*** + + +******* This file should be named 12483.txt or 12483.zip ******* + + +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: +https://www.gutenberg.org/1/2/4/8/12483 + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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