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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/12361-0.txt b/12361-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..57b9530 --- /dev/null +++ b/12361-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,10482 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 12361 *** + +THE MOTHER'S RECOMPENSE; + + +A SEQUEL TO HOME INFLUENCE. + + +BY GRACE AGUILAR. + + + + +IN TWO VOLUMES. + +VOL. I. + + +LEIPZIG + +BERNHARD TAUCHNITZ + +1859. + + + + +PREFACE. + + +The domestic story of "Home Influence," and its Sequel, the present +volume, were written in the early part of the year 1836, and the entire +work was completed when its author was little above the age of nineteen; +and, although no portion of it was published till some years after its +composition, but little alteration was made in the original plan. + +The labours of my dear child were unceasing, and from the hour when she +could read, it may truly be stated that she learned to write; her +contributions to the current literature of the day, her valuable works +upon religious subjects, and others of a lighter character, most of +which have been reprinted in other lands, all testify to a mind of no +common stamp; and here, in reply to numerous questions relative to her +literary remains, I may state that Grace Aguilar has left many excellent +works in manuscript, both in prose and verse; some of which may, at a +future day, be presented to the public. + +I have been induced to publish "The Mother's Recompense," in compliance +with the repeated solicitations of many friends, but in doing so I feel +it incumbent on me to state that, unlike its predecessor, it has not +received the advantage of that correction, which later years and ripened +judgment would doubtless have cast around it. A long and fatal illness +prevented its revision for the press; the circumstances of which will be +found detailed in a short memoir, accompanying the last edition of "Home +Influence." The universal voice of praise, which attended the +publication of that work, it was not permitted her to enjoy,--an +all-wise Creator called her to himself. + +It was ever my dear child's wish to aid, by the example of her pen, the +education of the Heart. It was her desire, in the truthful +exemplification of character, to point out to the youthful of her own +sex the paths of rectitude and virtue. The same kindly love--the same +heartfelt charity--the same spirit of devotion, which breathes through +every line in "Home Influence," will be found pervading the pages of the +present work. + +If, then, the Home Education of the Hamilton Family be well traced and +faithfully delineated in "Home Influence, a Tale for Mothers and +Daughters," its _effect_ will be found illustrated in the "Mother's +Recompense;" there, as its dear author writes, will still further be +portrayed the cares, anxieties, and ultimate reward of maternal love. + +SARAH AGUILAR. + +_December_, 1850. + + + + +THE MOTHER'S RECOMPENSE + +VOL. I. + + + + +CHAPTER I. + + +_From Emmeline Hamilton to Mary Greville_. + +London, January, 18-- + +At length, dearest Mary, I may write to you; at length indulge my +long-controlled wishes. My conscience has given me permission now, +though I once thought I never could again. We parted in August, and it +is now January; and except during our little tour, you have not had one +line from me, but very many more than one from Caroline and Ellen. I +used to wrong them, but I am glad I adhered to mamma's advice and my +resolution, painful as it has been; for it did seem hard that I, who +consider myself even more my dear Mary's own friend, should not address +you when my sister and cousin did. And now to explain this riddle, for +though mamma has excused my silence to you, I am quite sure she has not +told you the real truth. She would not expose my silly weakness, and +therefore prepare yourself for a most humiliating confession, which +will, in all probability, lower me ten degrees in your estimation. +However, truth must he told, and so it shall be with all the necessary +regularity and precision. _You_ know, almost better than any one else, +how very much I disliked the thought of leaving dear happy Oakwood, and +residing any part of the year in London. You often used to warn me, when +I have thus spoken, against permitting such fancies to obtain too much +dominion; but I did not follow your advice, dear Mary, but indulged them +till, of course, they became so heightened that the last month of our +sojourn at Oakwood was embittered by the anticipation. I saw you thought +me foolish, and I knew that mamma and papa's plans could not be altered +to please my fancy, and that my confessed distaste to them would give +pain to both: therefore, I concealed my dislike, but instead of doing +all I could to conquer it, encouraged every gloomy anticipation to the +very utmost. I found, during our delightful tour through the south of +England, I could enjoy myself, but still the thoughts of London, and +masters, and strangers, and the fancy our style of living would be so +different in the metropolis to what it was in Oakwood, and that I should +not see nearly as much of mamma, all chose to come, like terrifying +spectres, to scare away the present pleasure. + +We visited Oxford, although completely out of our way, in order that we +might see the residence of my brothers. There Percy's wild mirth and +eloquent descriptions partly banished my ill-humour, but as I neared +London all my fancied evils returned to me again. When we first arrived, +which was in September, this huge city was, comparatively speaking, a +desert; for all the fashionables were out ruralizing. Mamma was not, I +believe, sorry for this, for she wished us to have full six or seven +months' hard study before she entered at all into society. Ellen and I, +of course, will have more, but Caroline is to make her regular _entrĂ©e_ +in March or April, and therefore must be drilled accordingly. First-rate +masters were instantly engaged; indeed, papa had written to many before +we arrived, that no time should be lost, and as almost all their pupils +were from London, we had the choice of hours, which was very agreeable, +although at that time I did not feel inclined to think anything +agreeable, being accustomed to no instruction save that bestowed by Miss +Harcourt and mamma; professors of music, drawing, French, Italian, +German (which Caroline is seized with a violent fancy to acquire, and +which I deign to learn, because I should like to read Klopstock in the +original), and even what I term a lady professor of embroidery, which +Caroline has succeeded in tormenting mamma to let her have--_entre +nous_, it is only because she has taught Annie Grahame; all these, my +dear Mary, presented a most formidable array, and for the first month I +did not choose to profit by their instructions in the least. I gave full +vent to all the dislike I felt to them. I encouraged indolence to a +degree that frequently occasioned a reproof from Miss Harcourt. I could +not bear their mode of teaching; the attention so many things required +was in my present state a most painful exertion, and I almost made an +inward determination to show mamma that all her endeavours were lost on +me. I would not learn when everything was so changed. Do not throw away +my letter in despair of your friend, dearest Mary; only read to the end, +and perhaps my character may be in some measure redeemed. There was a +weight on my spirits I could not, because I would not, remove. I became +ill-tempered and petulant without cause; before papa and mamma I tried +to restrain it, but did not always succeed. Percy and Herbert both +spoke to me on this unwarrantable change; and I think almost for the +first time in my life I saw Percy seriously angry with me, for I had +even shown my irritation at his interference. I told him I had a right +to act and feel as I pleased. Herbert looked sorry, and desisted in his +reasonings when he found I would not listen. Percy's evident irritation +and the reproaches of my own conscience added not a little to my +uncomfortable feelings, as you may suppose. I looked back to what I had +been at Oakwood, and the contrast of my past and present self really +gave me much cause for misery. It was just before my brothers returned +to college I wrote to you a long, very long letter, in which I gave more +than enough vent to my silly, I should say sinful feelings. Several +hours I had employed in its composition, and to obtain these, neglected +my exercises, etc, for my masters, and caused more than one for several +days to make a formal complaint of my indolence and carelessness to Miss +Harcourt. Her remonstrances, I am ashamed to confess, only had the +effect of increasing my ill-temper. Well; I concluded at length my +epistle to you, which, had you received it, would have been a trial of +patience indeed; for it consisted of ten or twelve closely-written +pages, in which I had so magnified my feelings of discontent and +unhappiness, that any one must have fancied I had not one single +blessing left. I was folding and preparing to seal it, when mamma +entered my room. I must tell you that as yet I had not had one reproof +from her lips, though I am quite sure I deserved it long before; I used +to see her look very grieved at any burst of petulance from me, but she +had never spoken on the subject. I almost trembled when she appeared, +for I knew that morning Miss Harcourt had said she must inform her of +Mons. Deville and Signor Rozzi's continued complaints. Without entering +on that subject, however, she sat down by me, and with one of her own +sweet smiles, which reproached me a great deal more than words, she +asked me if I really were going to seal and send that long letter of +confidence to you without having shown or told any part of it to her. +She might well ask, dear Mary, for I had never written a line before +which I had kept from her; but my conscience told me she would not, +could not approve of this, and therefore I certainly did wish I could +have sent it without telling her anything about it. What deceit, too! I +hear you exclaim. Yes, dear Mary; and before this tale of shame is over, +you will see still more clearly how one fault makes many. I did not +answer her question, but remained sulkily silent. + +"Will my Emmeline think me a harsh intruder on her private thoughts, if +I say I cannot let this letter go till I have seen at least some parts +of its contents?" she said very mildly, but so firmly I had no power to +resist her; and when she asked if I would not, as I always did, read her +some portions, I answered, pettishly, if she read any she might as well +read all. She looked deeply grieved, and my heart painfully smote me the +moment the words were said; but I was too proud at that moment to show +any marks of contrition, and all the time she was reading I continued +working myself up to increased ill-humour. + +"Are you indeed so very unhappy, my dear Emmeline?" were the only words +mamma said, as she laid down, the last sheet and looked in my face, +with a tear trembling in her eye. I turned away, for I felt too +irritated and cross to give way to the emotion I always feel when I see +her grieved, and I was determined not to answer. "And do you prefer," +she continued, "seeking the sympathy of a young girl like yourself to +that of a mother, who has always endeavoured not only to sympathise +with, but to soothe the sorrows of her children?" Still I would not +answer, and she added, mildly, "Do you not think, Emmeline, Mary would +have been better pleased if you had written to her rather in a lighter +strain? do you not think, if you were to try and shake off these painful +fancies, you could write another and less desponding letter--one that I +might give you my full and free permission to send, which, sorry as I am +to say it, I cannot with this?" + +Mild as were her words and manner, the import of what she said put the +finishing stroke to my ill-temper. "If I may not write as I like, I will +not write at all," I passionately exclaimed, and seizing the sheet +nearest to me tore it asunder, and would have done the same with the +rest, had not mamma gently laid her hand on my arm, uttering my name in +an accent of surprise and sorrow; my irritable and sinful feelings found +vent in a most violent flood of tears. + +Will you not think, dearest Mary, I am writing of Caroline, and not of +myself; does it not resemble the scenes of my sister's childhood? Can +you believe that this is an account of your Emmeline, whose sweetness of +temper and gentleness of disposition you have so often extolled? But it +was I who thus forgot myself--I, who once believed nothing ever could +make me passionate or angry, and in one minute I was both--had excited +myself till I became so even against my nature, and with whom?--even my +mother, my kind, devoted mother, who has ever done so much for me, whom +in my childhood, when I knew her worth much less than I do now, I had +never caused to shed a tear. Oh, Mary, I cannot tell you what I felt the +moment those passionate words escaped me. I may truly say I did not cry +from anger, but from the most bitter, the most painful self-reproach. I +think her usual penetration must have discovered this, for if she had +thought my tears were really those of passion, she would not, could not +have acted as she did. + +She drew me gently to her, and kissed me without speaking. I threw my +arms round her neck, and in a voice almost choked by sobs, implored her +again and again to forgive me; that I did not mean to answer her so +disrespectfully--that I knew I had become a very wicked girl, but that I +really did feel very unhappy. For a few minutes she was silent, and I +could see was struggling to suppress the tears my unusual conduct had +occasioned. I will make no apology, dearest Mary, for entering on such +minute details; for I know how you love my mother, and that every word +she says is _almost_ as precious to you as to her own children--_quite_ +it cannot be; and I give you this account also, that you may know me as +I am, and not imagine I am so free from faults as I know you once +believed me. Oh, when I have looked back on that day, I have felt so +painfully humiliated, I would gladly banish the recollection; but it is +better for me to remember it, lest I should fancy myself better than I +am. Every word she said in that gentle and persuasive tone was engraved +upon my heart, even as she spoke. She easily and fully convinced me of +my sinfulness in thus permitting imaginary evils to make me so +miserable: for that they were but imaginary it was easy to discover. Not +a single blessing could I say I had lost. All I loved were around me, in +health and happiness--every comfort of life was the same; and could it +be possible, mamma said, that the mere departure from a favourite +residence, and only for a few months, could render me so completely +blind to the many blessings my Heavenly Father had scattered around me. +As she spoke, a film appeared removed from my eyes, and the enormity of +my conduct stood for the first time in its true colours before me. I +saw--I knew how sinful I had been; and bitterly I regretted that I had +not confessed every feeling to mamma, instead of hiding them, as I had +done, in my own heart, and brooding on them till it became a kind of +pleasure to do so, and till fancied evils produced real ones. I wept +bitterly while she spoke, for to find how completely I had created +misery for myself was no agreeable matter of reflection, and my remorse +was heightened when mamma said, "You have disappointed us not a little, +my dear Emmeline; for I will no longer conceal from you that the little +tour we took on our way to London was originally planned by your father +and myself, to reconcile you to a change of residence. We saw how much +you regretted leaving Oakwood; nor did we wonder at it, for such +feelings were most natural to one of your disposition; and therefore, +instead of travelling direct, and suddenly changing the scenes of our +beautiful Devonshire for the confinement of this huge city, we hoped by +visiting various places, and giving you new objects of reflection, to +lessen your regret, and make the change of residence less painfully +abrupt." As well as I could, I expressed my sorrow and repentance, and +promised to use every endeavour to atone for the past, and become all +that she and papa wished me. + +"I believe you, my own Emmeline," my kind mother said, as she again +kissed me, and her voice was no longer so sorrowfully grave as it had +been at first. "I am sure, now you know all the pain you were inflicting +on both your parents, every effort will be put in force to remove it." +Did I deserve this speech, dear Mary? I do not think I did; for I often +saw by mamma's countenance I had grieved her, and yet made no effort to +control myself, and so I told her. She smiled her own sweet, dear smile +of approbation, and thanking me for my candour, said-- + +"If I say that by indulging in these gloomy fancies and appearing +discontented, and repining when so many blessings are around you, my +Emmeline will be doing her mother a real injury, by rendering my +character questionable, not only in the eyes of the world, but of my +most valued friends, will she not do all in her power to become her own +light-hearted self again?" + +"Injuring your character, dearest mother!" I exclaimed, with much +surprise; "in what manner?" + +"I will tell you, my love," she replied; "there are many, not only of my +acquaintances, but my friends, those whose opinions I really value, who +believe I have been acting very wrongly all these years, in never having +permitted you and Caroline to visit London. They think by this strict +retirement I have quite unfitted you both for the station your rank +demands you should fill. That by constantly living alone with us, and +never mingling in society, you have imbibed notions that, to say the +least, may be old-fashioned and romantic, and which will make you both +feel uncomfortable when you are introduced in London. These fears never +entered my mind; I wished you to receive ideas that were somewhat +different to the generality of Fashion's dictates, and I did not doubt +but that the uncomfortable feeling, against which the letters of my +friends often warned me, would very quickly be removed. But since we +have been here--I do not wish to grieve you more, my dear Emmeline--I +must confess your conduct has been productive to me of the most painful +self-reproach. I thought, indeed, my friends were right, and that for +years I had been acting on an injudicious plan, and that instead of my +measures tending to future happiness, they were only productive of pain +and misery, which, had I done as other mothers of my station, might have +been avoided." + +"Oh! do not, pray do not think so," I exclaimed, for she had spoken so +sorrowfully, I could not bear it. "I formed my own misery, dearest +mother; you had nothing to do with it." + +"You think so now, my love," she answered, with her usual fondness; "but +if my friends see you gloomy and sad, and evidently discontented, +longing for pleasures which are not offered to you in London, only +dwelling on visions of the past, and notions tending to the indulgence +of romance, what will they think? will not my judgment be called in +question? and more, they know how very much I prefer a country to a +London life, domestic pleasures, to those of society, and they may +imagine, and with some probability, that to indulge my selfish wishes, +I have disregarded the real interests of my children." + +"They cannot, they will not think so," I passionately said. "They can +never have known you who form such conclusions." Would you not have +agreed with me, dear Mary, and can you not fancy the wretchedness +mamma's words inflicted? + +"My love," she replied, with a smile, "they will not fancy they do not +know me; they will rather imagine they must have been deceived in their +opinion; that I am not what I may have appeared to them some few years +ago. The character of a mother, my Emmeline, is frequently judged of by +the conduct of her children; and such conclusions are generally correct, +though, of course, as there are exceptions to every rule, there are to +this, and many a mother may have been unjustly injured in the estimation +of the world, by the thoughtless or criminal conduct of a wilful and +disobedient child. I have been so completely a stranger to London +society the last sixteen years, that my character and conduct depend +more upon you and Caroline to be raised or lowered in the estimation of +my friends and also of the world, than on any of the young people with +whom you may mingle. On which, then, will my Emmeline decide,--to +indulge in these gloomy fancies, and render herself ill both in health +and temper, as well as exposing her mother to censure and suspicion; or +will she, spite of the exertion and pain it may occasion, shake off this +lethargy, recall all her natural animation and cheerfulness, and with +her own bright smile restore gladness to the hearts of her parents?" + +I could not speak in answer to this appeal, dear Mary, but I clung +weeping to mamma's neck. I never till that moment knew all my +responsibility, how much depended on my conduct; but at that moment I +inwardly vowed that never, never should my conduct injure that dear +devoted mother, who endeavoured so fondly to soothe my grief, and check +my bitter tears; who had done so much for me, who had devoted herself so +completely to her children. Mentally I resolved that nothing should be +wanting on my part to render her character as exalted in the eyes of the +world as it was in mine. I could not bear to think how ungratefully I +had acted, and I cried till I made my head and mamma's heart ache; but I +could not long resist her fond caresses, her encouraging words, and +before she left me I could even smile. + +"And what am I to say," she said, with her usual playfulness, "of the +sad complaints that I have received the last few days from Miss +Harcourt, that she does not know what has come to you, from Mons. +Deville and Signer Rozzi? Now what am I to say or do to prove that this +Mademoiselle Emmeline does like Italian, and is not ill, as our polite +professors fancy? must I lecture as I did when she was an idle little +girl, and liked her play better than her studies? Suppose these +gentlemen are asked, which in all probability they certainly are, what +sort of pupils Mrs. Hamilton's daughters are; they ought to be something +out of the way, for we hear she has instructed them principally herself. +What answer will be given, what conclusions drawn, if you do not exert +yourself and prove that you can learn as well, when you like, as your +sister, and even quicker than your cousin?" + +I felt so ashamed, dearest Mary, that I concealed my face on her +shoulder, and would not even look up to promise amendment, for I felt I +was not certain of myself; but when mamma spoke of my letter to you, and +asked me if I still wished to send it, or if I would not write another, +I made a desperate effort, and answered as well as I could-- + +"I will not write again to Mary, dear mamma, till I have conquered all +these silly and sinful feelings, and can write as usual; and to be quite +sure of myself, that I may not break my resolution, I promise you that +for six months I will not give myself the pleasure of addressing her, +and if even at the end of that time you do not think I have sufficiently +recovered my senses, which certainly appear to have deserted me, you +shall increase at your will my time of probation; I deserve some +privation for my ungrateful conduct, and the not writing to Mary now is +the greatest I can think of." I tried to appear very heroic as I made +this speech, but with all my efforts I completely failed. Mamma looked +at me a moment in surprise, but then, with more than usual fondness, she +strained me to her heart, and I felt a tear fall on my cheek. + +"My own sweet child, my darling Emmeline!" she exclaimed, "I did not +expect this offered sacrifice, but I will accept it, my own love, and +let its pain he soothed to your affectionate heart by the knowledge that +in making it, you have given me the purest, most delicious sense of +pleasure you could bestow. We will not say six months," she added, more +playfully, "we will see what the middle or end of January brings. You +will then still have nearly four months to redeem your character. I have +not the slightest doubt that even before that period my Emmeline will be +herself." Oh, Mary, I felt so very happy as she thus spoke, that I +thought I must find it very easy to conquer myself, but I was mistaken, +painfully mistaken; I had encouraged despondency and gloom for so long a +period, that it required every exertion, in the very least, to subdue +it. I had chosen to waste my time, and be inattentive to all the means +of improvement which were offered me, and to command my attention +sufficiently to regain the good opinion of our sage professors was most +disagreeably difficult; but I was no longer afraid, to encounter mamma's +sorrowful or reproving glance, as I had been before, and her fond +encouragement and the marks of approval which both she and papa +bestowed, when I could not but feel I had done little to deserve them, +lightened the labour of my task, and by causing me to wish earnestly to +deserve their kindness, increased my efforts; and at length, dearest +Mary, these miserable feelings so completely departed from me, that I +was surprised to perceive how very nearly I could be as happy in London +as at dear Oakwood; quite as happy is impossible, because I feel more +and more how very much I prefer a quiet domestic life in the country to +London and society. You will perhaps smile as mamma does, and say I am +not introduced yet, and then I may change my mind; but I do not think I +shall. She prefers the country, so it will not be very strange if I +should; but when I see how completely, and yet how cheerfully, she has +given up her favourite residence and employments, for the interests and +happiness of her children, I feel ashamed at the egregious selfishness +which has been mine. Oh, Mary, when shall I ever be like mamma? when can +I ever be worthy of half, nay, one quarter of that respectful admiration +which is bestowed upon her, even by those whose principles and conduct +are directly opposite? + +In her conversations with me she had spoken more of the opinion of the +world than she ever did at Oakwood, and one day venturing to notice it, +as being contrary to that which she so carefully instilled, that to God +and our conscience we should alone be answerable for our conduct, she +answered, with a smile-- + +"I have been long expecting this remark, my dear Emmeline, and I have +endeavoured to be prepared with an answer. To our Father in Heaven and +to our own conscience we must still look for our guide in life; that not +in one thing must we transgress the love and duty we owe our Maker, or +disregard the warning or reproaches of our hearts; but still, mingling +in the world as it is undoubtedly our duty to do--for as I have often +told you, we do not live for ourselves, but for others--we must have due +regard in minor things to the opinions of those with whom we associate. +When a woman has once set up for an Independent, when, scorning the +opinion of the world, she walks forth conscious in her own integrity and +virtue, though no stain may have sullied her conduct or name, though she +may be innately amiable and good, yet every gentler female will shrink +from such a character, and tremble lest they should become like her. +Women are dependent beings; in Infinite Wisdom it was thus ordained, and +why should we endeavour to be otherwise? When once we set up a standard +for ourselves, we have thrown aside our surest safeguard, and exposed +ourselves to censure and suspicion. When the ordinances of society do +not interfere with the higher principle of our lives they should be +obeyed, and in doing so we are following up the dictates of true +religion, by doing our duty as members of a community, as children of +one common father, which, if we stand selfishly apart, we cannot do. I +speak more of the opinion of the world," mamma then continued, "to you +than either to your sister or your cousin. Caroline I would rather check +in her perhaps too great regard for admiration; and Ellen is at present +too young, and in much too delicate health, to go out with me as much as +you will, even before you are what is termed introduced: besides which, +her natural reserve and timidity banish all fears on that account for +her. But for you, Emmeline, I do sometimes feel fearful that, in the +indulgence of uncontrolled feeling, you will forget you are not quite +such an independent being as you were at Oakwood. Many of your ideas are +quite contrary to those generally entertained by several with whom you +may associate; and I sometimes dread that by their unchecked expression, +or the avowed determination never to think as your companions do--that +you hate such confined ideas, or some such thing, which," and she +smiled, "if I know my Emmeline rightly, is not at all unlikely--you may +be exposing yourself to suspicion and dislike. I feel quite sure you +never will wilfully offend, or that you will really deserve such +censure; all I wish is that you will be a little more guarded and +controlled in your intercourse with strangers here, than you ever were +in the happy halls of Oakwood." + +I did not answer, my dear Mary; for I do not know why, but there was +something in her words that caused my eyes to fill with tears. I think +it was because it seemed such a painful task to maintain such a +continued control over my words and feelings, and mamma as usual divined +the cause of my sadness, even before I could define it myself. + +"Do not look so very sad, my sweet girl," she said so fondly, that like +a simpleton I cried the more. "I do not wish to see you changed, however +different you may be to others. I do not wish to chill one feeling in +this affectionate little heart, nor check one burst of enthusiasm. Your +character has been and is too great a source of unalloyed pleasure to +your mother, my Emmeline; it would be misery indeed to see it in any way +changed, though I do preach control so very much," she continued, more +playfully, but with that same fond affection which, while it made me +cry, appeared to soothe every painful emotion. "We shall not always be +in society, Emmeline; come to me as of old, and tell me every thought +and feeling, and all that has given you pain or pleasure. With me, +dearest, there must be no control, no reserve; if there be the least +appearance of either, you will inflict more pain on my heart than from +your infancy you have ever done, for I shall think my own counsels have +alienated from me the confidence of my child." + +I never shall forget the impressive sadness with which she spoke these +words, dearest Mary, and clinging to her, I declared and with truth, as +long as I might speak and think and feel without control when with her, +I would be all, all she wished in society--that I never could be +unhappy,--and to be reserved with her, I felt sure I never, never could. +She embraced me with the utmost tenderness, and banished all my +remaining sadness by the earnest assurance that she believed me. + +What a long letter have I written to you, my dearest friend; will you +not say I have atoned for my long silence? If I have not atoned to you, +I have at least gratified myself; for you know not how very often I +longed, after such conversations as I have recounted, to sit down and +write them all to you, as I had promised, when I could no longer tell in +speech all my kind mother's instructions. + +I do not make any apology for writing so much of her and myself, for I +know to you it is unnecessary. I tried to write all she said, that you +may benefit by it likewise, and in doing so I assure you I give you the +sincerest proof of my affection; for to no one but my own Mary have I +thus related the precious conversations I had alone with mamma. I know +no one but you whom I deem worthy of them. How I wish in return you +could solve a riddle for me. Why do I _fear_ mamma so much, when I love +her so very dearly? When I do or even think anything that my conscience +tells me is wrong, or at least not right, I absolutely tremble when I +meet her eye, though she may know nothing for which to condemn me. I +have never heard her voice in anger, but its sorrowful tones are far +more terrible. I think sometimes, if I had been in Ellen's place +eighteen months ago, I should have been as ill from fear alone, as she +was from a variety of emotions, poor girl. Yet why should I feel thus? +Caroline does not even understand me when I speak of such an emotion. +She says she is always very sorry when she has displeased mamma; but +fear is to her unknown--we two certainly are complete opposites. I think +Ellen's character resembles mine much more than my sister's does. But +you will like to know how my time of probation is thus shortened. For I +should have kept my resolution and waited the six months, pain as it +was, but one day about a week ago, mamma chanced to enter our study at +the very instant that the poor man who so politely believed Mademoiselle +Emmeline was too ill to appreciate his lessons was praising me up to the +skies for my progress; that same day Signor Rozzi had informed mamma, +with all the enthusiasm of his nation, that he was delighted to teach a +young lady who took such pleasure in the study of poetry, and so capable +of appreciating the beauties of the Italian poets. "In truth, madam," he +said, "she should be a poet herself, and the Temple of the Muses graced +with her presence." There's for you, Mary! But jokes apart, I do love +Italian; it is, it must be the natural language of poetry; the +sentiments are so exquisitely lovely, the language, the words, as if +framed to receive them--music dwells in every line. Petrarch, Tasso, +Dante, all are open to me now, and I luxuriate even in the anticipation +of the last,--but how I am digressing. That night mamma followed me to +my room, as I retired to bed, and smiling, almost laughing, at the half +terror of my countenance expressed, for I fancied she had come to +reprove the wild spirits I had indulged in throughout the day, she said, +"Is not this little head half turned with the flattery it has received +to-day?" + +"No," I instantly replied. "It is only the approbation of one or two +that can put me in any danger of such a misfortune." + +"Indeed," she answered, again smiling; "I fancied it was the fine +speeches you had been hearing to-day that had excited such high spirits, +but I am glad it is not; otherwise, I might have hesitated to express +what I came here to do--my approbation of my Emmeline's conduct the last +few months." + +I felt my colour rising to my very temples, dear Mary, for I did not +expect this, but I endeavoured to conceal all I felt by seizing her +hand, and imploring her, in a serio-comic, semi-tragic tone, not to +praise me, for she and papa were the two whose praises would have the +effect on me she feared. + +"But you must endeavour to keep your head steady now," she continued, +"because papa sends a packet to Oakwood next week, and a long letter for +Mary from my Emmeline must accompany it; her patience, I think, must be +very nearly exhausted, and I know if you once begin to write, a frank +will not contain all you will have to say, will it?" she added, with an +arch but such a dear smile. + +All my high spirits seemed for the moment to desert me, and I could not +answer her, except to cover her hand with kisses. I have told you what +she said in the way of reproof and advice, my dear Mary, but I cannot +coolly write all she said as encouragement and praise; it was much more +than I deserved, and all, therefore, that I can do, is to continue my +endeavours to feel one day rather more to merit it. I have risen every +morning an hour earlier, that I might tell you all I wished without +encroaching on my allotted hours of study; for I hope you will not +imagine I have written all this in one or two, or even three sittings; +and now do I not deserve a letter almost as long from you? If you do not +thus reward me, dread my vengeance, and write soon, for I long to have a +letter from you; of you I have heard often--but of and from, though +they may be both brothers of the family of the prepositions, are very +different in meaning. I have not written one word of Caroline or Ellen. +Am I not incurably egotistical? The former declares she is sure you will +have no time to read a letter from her, with such a volume as mine, and +Ellen says she has no time by this opportunity. I told her she ought to +get up as I did, she blushed, looked confused enough to awaken my +attention, and then said she supposed she was too lazy; and now I really +must say farewell. Mind you write all concerning yourself and your dear +mother, to whom present my very loving respects, and as for yourself, +dear Mary, let this long letter prove the sincere affection and perfect +confidence of your giddy friend, + +EMMELINE. + +P.S.--No young lady can write without a post-script. Mamma has +absolutely had the patience to read through my letter, and except that +she said so much of her was certainly needless, she approves of it +almost as much as she disapproved of my other, which she has just +compelled me to read. What a tissue of absurdity it contained,--worse, +it is sinful. I have had the pleasure of burning it, and I hope and +trust all my silly repinings are burnt with it. Once more, adieu. + +E.H. + + +_From Mrs. Hamilton to Miss Greville._ + +I cannot, my dear Mary, suffer Emmeline's long letter to be forwarded to +you without a few lines from me, to remove all lingering fears which you +may perhaps have had, that I do not approve of your correspondence. +Believe me, my dear girl, that to see you the chosen friend of my giddy +but warm-hearted Emmeline is still, as it has ever been from your +childhood, a source of real pleasure both to Mr. Hamilton and myself. +Female friendships are, I know, often regarded with contempt, not only +by men, but frequently by the sterner principles of our own sex; they +are deemed connections of folly; that the long letters which pass +between young ladies set down by the world as intimate friends, are but +relations of all the petty incidents they may hear or see. Such letters +are also considered tending to weaken the mind and produce false +sensibility, by the terms of affection they force into their +service--the magnified expression of momentary and fleeting emotions. +That such may sometimes be the tenor of some young people's +correspondence, I do not pretend to deny, and when that is the case, and +such letters are treasured up in secret and requested to be burnt, lest +any eyes save those for whom they are intended should chance to +encounter them, then, indeed, I too might disapprove of similar +intimacies, and it was to prevent this I would not permit Emmeline to +send the first letter to which she has alluded. Every feeling was +magnified and distorted, till you must have fancied--had not the real +cause been told--that some very serious evil had happened, or was +impending over her. I did not in the least doubt but that you would have +used all your influence to combat with and conquer this sinful repining; +but still I thought your very replies might have called forth renewed +ebullitions of sensibility, and thus in the frame of mind which she was +then indulging, your hinted reproaches, however gentle, might have been +turned and twisted into a decay of friendship or some such display of +sensitiveness, which would certainly have removed your affection and +injured herself. When, therefore, she so frankly acknowledged her error, +and offered to sacrifice the pleasure I knew it was to write to you, I +accepted it, spite of the pain which I saw she felt, and which to +inflict on her, you may believe gave her, and now I certainly feel +rewarded for all the self-denial we both practised, Emmeline is again +the same happy girl she was at Oakwood, although I can perceive there is +nothing, or at best but very little here, that can compensate for the +rural pleasures she has left. I do not wonder at this, for in such +feelings I trace those which, from my girlhood, were my own. I hope, +therefore, my dear young friend, that nothing in future will check your +intercourse with Emmeline, but that your correspondence may long +continue a source of pleasure to both of you. I love to see the perfect +confidence with which Emmeline has written, it proves she regards you as +you deserve to be regarded, as indeed her friend, not her companion in +frivolity and sentiment; and believe me, you may thus have it in your +power to improve and strengthen her perhaps rather too yielding +character. The manner in which, through the mercy of our compassionate +God, you have been enabled, young as you are, to bear your trials, which +are indeed severe, has inspired her with a respect for your character, +which the trifling difference in your ages might otherwise have +prevented, and therefore your letters will be received with more than +ordinary interest, and your good example, my dear girl, may do much +towards teaching her to bear those evils of life from which we cannot +expect her to be exempt, with the same patient resignation that +characterises you. Write to her therefore, as often as you feel +inclined, and do not, I beg, suppress the thoughts her candid letter may +have produced. I will not ask you to read her confession charitably, for +I know you will, and I assure you she has completely redeemed her fault. +The struggle was a very severe one to subdue the depression she had +encouraged so long; but she has nobly conquered, and I do not fear such +feelings of discontent ever again obtaining too great an ascendency. + +Tell your dear mother, with my affectionate love, that she will be +pleased to hear Ellen's health is improving, and has not as yet suffered +in the least from the winter or the more confined air of London, which I +almost dreaded might be baneful to one so delicate as she was when we +left Oakwood. I think our little tour did her much good, though the idea +of the exertion at first appeared painful. She is ever cheerful, though +I sometimes wish she would be more lively, and cannot help fancying, +notwithstanding her melancholy as a child was remarkable, that her +sufferings, both bodily and mental, the last eighteen months have made +her the very pensive character she is. I had hoped before that +unfortunate affair she was becoming as animated and light-hearted as my +Emmeline, but as that cannot be, I endeavoured to be thankful for the +health and quiet, and, I trust, happiness she now enjoys. We receive, +every opportunity, from Edward very satisfactory and pleasing letters, +which, as you will believe, tend not a little to lessen the anxiety of +both his sister and myself. His new captain is a far sterner character +and even more rigid in discipline than was Sir Edward Manly; but our +young sailor writes that this is rather a source of pleasure to him, for +it will be the greater merit to win his regard, which he has resolved to +use every endeavour to maintain. + +I must not forget, in thus writing of my family, to mention that Herbert +never writes home without inquiring after his favourite Mary, and if his +sisters do not answer such queries very particularly, they are sure in +the next letter to obtain as severe a reproach as can flow from his pen. +Will you not return such little tokens of remembrance, my dear girl? +Herbert has only lately changed the term by which in his boyhood he has +so often spoken of you--his sister Mary; and surely friends in such +early childhood may continue so in youth. The season has not, and will +not yet commence here. Caroline is anticipating it with a delight which +I could wish less violent. I certainly never observed the very striking +contrast between my daughters as I do now, though I always knew they +were very unlike. You, dear Mary, would, I think, even more than +Emmeline, shrink from the life which for a few months in every year we +must now lead, if we would do our duty in the station we are ordained to +fill. I think one season will prove to Caroline that it is not in gaiety +she will find true and perfect happiness, and if it do so, I shall join +in society next year with a less trembling heart. And now, adieu, my +dear young friend. If by Emmeline's long silence you have ever permitted +yourself to entertain a suspicion that I did not approve of your +correspondence, let this letter from me prove your error, and remember, +if ever sorrows in your young yet chequered life should assail you, and +you would conceal them from your revered parent, fearing to increase +her griefs, write to me without hesitation, without fear, and I will +answer you to the best of my ability; for sympathy, believe me, you will +never appeal to me in vain, and if you require advice, I will give it +you with all the affection I feel towards you. God bless you, my dear +girl. + +Yours, most affectionately, E. HAMILTON. + + +_From Emmeline Hamilton to Mary Greville._ + +A month, actually a whole month has elapsed, dearest Mary, since I wrote +to you last, and not a line from you. Granting it was nearly a week on +the way, three weeks are surely long enough for you to have written an +answer, when I entreated you to write so soon. What can be the cause of +this silence? I will not upbraid you, because I tremble when I think +what may perhaps have occasioned it. Mamma has become almost as anxious +as myself, therefore, as soon as you can, pray write, if it be but one +line to say you are well and at peace, I do not, will not ask more. I +scarcely like to write on indifferent subjects in this letter, but yet +as you have given me nothing to answer, I must do so to fill up my +paper; for if what I dread be not the case, you will not thank me for an +epistle containing but a dozen lines. London is becoming rather more +agreeable, and the fogs have given place to fine weather. The Court +arrived from Brighton yesterday, and they say the town will now rapidly +fill. Caroline is all joy, because early next month Mr. Grahame's family +leave Brighton. They have a fine house in Piccadilly not very far from +us, and Caroline is anticipating great pleasure in the society of Annie. +I wonder what my sister can find to like so much in Miss Grahame; to me +this friendship has been and is quite incomprehensible. She does not +possess one quality that would attract me; what a fortunate thing it is +we do not all like the same sort of people. Congratulate me, my dear +friend, I am overcoming in a degree my dislike to the company of +strangers. Some of papa and mamma's select friends and their families +have been calling on us the last month, and we have lately had rather +more society in the evening; not anything like large parties, but nice +little conversaziones, and really the lords and ladies who compose them +are much more agreeable than my fancy pictured them. They are so +intelligent, and know so much of the world, and the anecdotes they +relate are so amusing, and some so full of good-natured wit, that in one +evening I become more advanced in my favourite study, that of character, +than I do in weeks spent in retirement. Caroline is very much admired, +and I sometimes look at her with surprise; for she certainly looks much +better, and makes herself more agreeable among strangers than she +_always_ does at home. Mamma would call that perhaps an unkind +reflection, but I do not mean it for such; some people are more +fascinating out than at home. I am contented to remain in the shade, and +only speak when I am spoken to, like a good little girl; that is to say, +I converse with those who are good-natured enough to converse with me, +and many agreeable evenings have I passed in that way. There is her +Grace the Duchess D----, a very delightful woman, with elegant manners, +and full of true kindness. I like the way she speaks to her daughters, +at least her two youngest--the rest are married--Lady Anne and Lady +Lucy; they appear very nice young women, agreeable companions, as yet +we have but little conversation in common, though they appear to get on +remarkably well with Caroline. The Countess Elmore, a _nouvelle mariĂ©e_, +but a delightful creature, so exquisitely lovely--such eyes, hair, +teeth; and yet these rare charms appear entirely forgotten, or displayed +only for the Earl her husband, who is worthy of it all. He has talked to +me so often, that his wife also takes a great deal of notice of me, and +when they are of our party I always pass an agreeable evening. The Earl +is well acquainted with our beautiful Devonshire, dearest Mary; he +admires country as I do, and he asked so much about it one night last +week, that I quite forgot all my intentions about control, and actually +talked and apostrophised the Dart as I would to one of my own brothers. +I forgot everybody else in the room, till I caught mamma's glance fixed +earnestly on me, and then, my dear friend, I did not feel over +comfortable, however, I was soon at ease again, for I saw it was only +_warning_, not _reproving_; and the next morning, when I sought her to +tell her all my delight of the preceding evening, she shared in it all, +and when I asked her, half fearfully, if her glance meant I was passing +the boundary she had laid down, she said, "Not with the Earl of Elmore, +my dear Emmeline; but had you been talking in the same animated strain +to the Marquis of Alford, who, I believe, took you into supper, I should +say you had." + +"But I did not with him," I exclaimed. + +"No, my love," she answered, laughing at the anxiety that was, I felt, +imprinted on my face. "But why are you so terrified at the bare +suggestion?" + +"Because," I said, and I felt I blushed, "he is a single man; and I +never can speak with the same freedom to unmarried as to married men." + +"And why not?" she asked, and fixed her most penetrating glance on my +face. + +I became more and more confused, dear Mary, for I felt even to my own +mother it would be difficult to express my feelings on that subject. I +managed, however, with some difficulty, to say that I had often heard +Annie say she hated assemblies where there were only married men, though +there might be some fun in endeavouring to excite the jealousy of their +wives; but it was nothing compared to the triumph of chaining young men +to her side, and by animated conversation and smiles make each believe +himself a special object of attraction, when, in reality, she cared +nothing for either. "Rather than do that," I exclaimed, starting from +the stool which I had occupied at mamma's feet, and with an energy I +could not restrain, "I would bury myself for ever in a desert, and never +look upon a face I loved; rather than play upon the feelings of my +fellow-creatures, I would--I know not what I would not endure. Mother," +I continued, "mother, if ever you see me for one instant forget myself, +and by word or sign approach the borders of what is termed coquetry, +promise me faithfully you will on the instant prevent farther +intercourse, you will not hesitate one moment to tell me of it; even +though in your eyes it may appear but earnest or animated conversation. +Mother, promise me this," I repeated, for I felt carried so far beyond +myself, that when I look back on that conversation, it is with +astonishment at my own temerity. "Annie has laughed at me when I +expressed my indignation; she says it is what every woman of fashion +does, and that I am ridiculous if I hope to be otherwise. Mother, you +will not laugh at me. Spare me, spare me from the remorse that will +ensue, if such ever be my conduct." + +"Fear not, my dear and noble child," she exclaimed (her voice I knew +expressed emotion), and she pressed me fondly to her heart; "I promise +all, all you wish. Retain these noble feelings, these virtuous fears, +and I shall never have occasion to do what you desire. Oh, that your +sister thought the same!" she added; and oh, Mary, I shall never forget +the tone of anxiety and almost distress with which those last words were +said. + +"She does, she will, she must," I said, vehemently, for I would have +given worlds to calm the anxiety I know she feels for Caroline, and I do +wish that on some points my sister thought as I do, not from vanity, my +dear Mary, believe me, but for her own happiness. I cannot describe each +member of our circle, dear Mary, in this letter, but you shall have them +by degrees. The Earl and Countess Elmore are my favourites. I was very +sorry mamma did not permit me to join a very small party at their house +last week; the Countess came herself to beg, but mamma's mandate had +gone forth long ago, and therefore I submitted I hope with a good grace, +but I doubt it. She wishes me only to join in society at home this year, +but next year I may go out with her as often as I please. Lord Henry +D'Este is one of the most amusing creatures I ever met with, he has +always some droll anecdote to relate that calls forth universal +merriment; but of single men, the Earl of St. Eval, eldest son of the +Marquis of Malvern, is the most agreeable. He is not particularly +handsome, but has an eloquent smile and persuading voice, very tall and +noble in his carriage. He has talked to me much of Oxford, where for +about six or seven months he was acquainted with my brothers, of whom he +spoke in such high terms, dear Mary, and quite regretted he could not +enjoy their society longer. He has since been on the Continent, and +relates so delightfully all he has remarked or seen among foreigners, +that it is evident he travelled really for pleasure and information, not +for fashion. He appears much attracted with Caroline. I am sure he +admires her very much, and I only wish she would be as pleased with him +as I am, but she always provokes me by saying he has not sufficient +_esprit_; nor is he quite handsome enough to please her; and yet she +never refuses his attentions or shrinks from his conversation, as, if I +disliked him (as when we are alone she appears to do), I know I should. +Do not tremble for my peace, dear Mary, as you read these flowing +descriptions. In society they are most agreeable, but as the partner of +my life, I have not yet seen one to whom, were the question asked, I +could with any hope of happiness give my hand. These scenes are well for +a time, but they are not those in which I would wish to pass my life. My +wishes are humbler, much humbler; but I do not yet understand them +sufficiently even to define them to myself. It is much the same with the +young ladies of rank with whom I now frequently associate; they are +agreeable companions, but not one, no, not one can supply your place, +dearest Mary. Not one can I love as I do you. We have no ideas in +common; amiable and good as in all probability they are, still, as my +intimate friends I could not regard them; and yet--strange contradiction +you will say--I wish Caroline could find one amongst them to supply the +place of Annie Grahame in her heart. Why am I so prejudiced against her, +you will ask. Mary, I am prejudiced, and I cannot help it. Something +tells me my sister will obtain no good from this intimacy, I never did +like her, and of late this feeling has increased. Ellen is pleased, too, +when her health permits her to join our agreeable little coteries. She +appears overcoming her very great reserve, but does not become more +lively. She looks always to me, as if she felt a stain yet lingers on +her character, and though mamma and papa treat her even more kindly than +they did before, if possible, still there are times when to me she +appears inwardly unhappy. Strangers would only pronounce her more +pensive than usual for her years; for her slight figure and very +delicate features, as well as retiring manner, make her appear even +younger than she is, but I sometimes fancy I read more. She is always +calm and gentle as she used to be, and I never can discover when +anything vexes her, except by her heightened colour, which is more +easily visible now than when her health was better. + +I am summoned away, dear Mary, to go with mamma to ride, and as this +leaves to night, I must not write more now; but I intend teasing you +with letters every week till you write to me, if you are not well, in +the sincere wish to arouse you and draw your thoughts from what may be +unpleasing subjects: and if you are idle, to spur you to your task. +Adieu, my dearest friend. + +Your ever affectionate EMMELINE. + + +_From Mary Greville to Emmeline Hamilton_. + +Greville Manor, March 13. + +How can I thank you sufficiently, my dearest Emmeline, for the +affectionate letters which I have received so regularly the last month. +I am still so weak that much writing is forbidden me, and therefore to +reply to them all as my affection dictates is impossible. But I know +your kind heart, my Emmeline; I know it will be satisfied, when I say +your letters have indeed cheered my couch of suffering; have indeed +succeeded not only in changing _my_ thoughts from the subject that +perhaps too much engrosses them, but sometimes even my poor mother's. +Your first long letter, dated January, you tell me you wrote to let me +know you as you are, that all your faults may be laid bare to my +inspection; and what is to be the consequence--that you are, as you said +you would be, lowered in my estimation? no, dear and candid girl, you +are not, and while you retain such ingenuousness of disposition, you +never can be. Wrong you certainly were to encourage such despondency, +when so very many blessings were around you; but when once you become +sensible of an error, it is already with you corrected. Mamma has, I +know, some weeks ago, written to Mrs. Hamilton, to tell her Greville +Manor is to be sold. We shall never return to it again; the haunts I so +dearly loved, the scenes in which I have spent so many happy hours, all +will pass into the hands of strangers,--it will be no longer our own; we +shall be no longer together, as for so many years we have been. In +changing my residence thus, I feel as if every tie I loved was torn +asunder. + + * * * * * + +I thought I could have written calmly on this subject, my Emmeline, but +I believed myself stronger, both in mind and body, than I am. I have +been very ill, and therefore let that be my excuse. Plead for me with +your mother, Emmeline; tell her she knows not how I struggle to conceal +every pang from the watchful eyes of that mother who has hung over my +couch, with an agony that has told me plainer than words I am indeed her +only joy on earth. My spirit has been so tortured the three months of my +stern father's residence at home, that I feel as if I would--oh! how +gladly--flee away and be at rest: but for her sake, I pray for life, for +strength; for her sake, I make no resistance to the advice of Mr. +Maitland, that for a year or two we should live in Italy or Switzerland, +though in leaving England I feel as if I left I know not what, but +somewhat more than the mere love for my native land. Why, why is my +health so weak? why does it ever suffer when my mind is unhappy? Oh, +Emmeline, you know not the fierce struggle it is not to murmur; to feel +that it is in mercy my Father in Heaven afflicts me thus. If I might but +retain my health, my mother should never suspect my sufferings, I would, +I know I would, hide them from every eye; but she reads them in my +failing frame and pallid features, when I would by every means in my +power prove to her that while she is spared to me, I cannot be wholly +unhappy. It was not illness of body that prevented my replying to your +first long letter; but papa and Alfred were both at home, and my nerves +were so frequently shaken, that I knew it would be impossible to write +and therefore did not attempt it, even at the risk of offending, or at +least giving pain to you. I begged mamma to write to Mrs. Hamilton, and +tell her all that had occurred, on the receipt of your second, dated +February; for I thought while explaining our silence it would relieve +herself, which I think it did. It is six weeks since then and I am only +now allowed to write, and have been already obliged to pause more than +once in my task; so forgive all incoherences, my dearest Emmeline. The +Manor is to be sold in June: for my sake, mamma ventured to implore my +father to dispose of another estate, which has lately become his, +instead of this, but he would not listen to her; and I implored her not +to harrow her feelings by vain supplications again. Alfred is to go to +Cambridge, and this increased expense, as it is for him, papa seems to +think nothing of, but to my poor mother it is only another subject of +uneasiness, not so much for our sakes as for his own. Temptations of +every kind will be around him; his own little income will never be +sufficient to enable him to lead that life which his inclination will +bid him seek. Misfortune on every side appears to darken the future; I +cannot look forward. Pray for me, my dearest friend, that I may be +enabled to trust so implicitly in the Most High that even now my faith +should not for a moment waver. Oh! Emmeline, spite of all his harshness, +his coldness, and evident dislike, my heart yearns to my father. Would +he but permit me, I would love and respect him as fondly as ever child +did a parent, and when, after beholding his cruelty to my mother, my +heart has sometimes almost involuntarily reproached him and risen in +rebellion against him, the remorse which instantly follows adds to that +heavy burden which bows me to the earth. We leave England in May, if I +am sufficiently strong. I do not think we shall visit London, but travel +leisurely along the coast to Dover. I wish I could see you once more, +for I know not if we shall ever meet again, dear Emmeline; but perhaps +it is better not, it would only heighten the pain of separation. I +should like much to have written to your kind good mother with this, but +I fear my strength will not permit, yet perhaps, if she have one +half-hour's leisure, she will write to me again; her letters indeed are +my comfort and support. I thank your brother Herbert for his many kind +and affectionate messages; tell him all you will of our plans, and tell +him--tell him--his sister Mary will never forget the brother of her +childhood--the kind, the sympathising companion of her youth. To Percy, +too, remember me; and say all your own affection would dictate to +Caroline and Ellen. I would have written to the latter, but my weakness +will I know prove my best excuse. Before I quite conclude, let me say +how pleased I am to think that, although you still regret Oakwood, you +can find some pleasures in your present life. The society you describe +must be agreeable. I could scarcely, however, refrain from smiling at +your simplicity, my dear Emmeline, in imagining that all who visited at +your father's house would be as delightful and estimable as those whom +your second letter so eloquently described. Why are we so constantly +commanded to be charitable in our intercourse one with another? Must it +not be because our Great Master knew that we all had failings, some more +than others? if all were as worthy and virtuous as some appear, there +would be no need to practise such a virtue; but it is in a mixed society +it is more frequently called into play. More, would we preserve our own +virtue and piety, we must be charitable. We must look on the weaknesses +of our fellow-creatures with mercy and kindness, or how can we demand it +for ourselves? I am no advocate for seclusion in general, though my own +feelings prefer a quiet life. I think a life of retirement is apt to +render us selfish, and too positive in the wisdom and purity of our own +notions, too prejudiced against the faults of our fellows. Society is a +mirror, where we can see human character reflected in a variety of +shades, and thereby, if our minds be so inclined, we may attain a better +knowledge of ourselves. If, before we condemned others, we looked into +our own hearts, we are likely to become more charitable and more humble +at the same moment, and our own conduct necessarily becomes more +guarded. But with your mother, my Emmeline, and your open +heart--unsophisticated as it may be--you will never go far wrong. Mamma +is looking anxiously at me, as if she feared I am exerting myself too +much. I feel my cheeks are painfully flushed, and therefore I will obey +her gentle hint. Farewell, my Emmeline; may you long be spared the +sorrows that have lately wrung the heart of your attached and constant +friend, + +MARY GREVILLE. + + +_From Mrs. Hamilton to Miss Greville_. + +London, March 20th. + +Your letter to Emmeline, my dear young friend, I have read with feelings +both of pain and pleasure, and willingly, most willingly, do I comply +with your request, that I would write to you, however briefly. Your +despondency is natural, and yet it is with delight I perceive through +its gloom those feelings of faith and duty, which your sense of religion +has made so peculiarly your own. I sympathise, believe me, from my +heart, in those trials which your very delicate health renders you so +little able to bear. I will not endeavour by words of consolation to +alleviate their severity, for I know it would be in vain. In your +earliest youth I endeavoured to impress upon your mind that we are not +commanded to check every natural feeling. We are but told to pour before +God our trouble, to lean on His mercy, to trust in His providence, to +restrain our lips from murmuring, and if we do so, though our tears may +fall, and our heart feel breaking, yet our prayers will be heard and +accepted on high. It is not with you, my poor girl, the weak indulgence +of sorrow that ever prostrates you on a couch of suffering, it is the +struggle of resignation and concealment that is too fierce for the +delicacy of your constitution; and do you not think that strife is +marked by Him, who, as a father, pitieth His children? Painful as it is +to you, my dear Mary, your sufferings may be in a degree a source of +mercy to your mother. Agonizing as it is to the heart of a parent, to +watch the fevered couch of a beloved child, yet had she not that +anxiety, the conduct of your father and brother might present still +deeper wretchedness. For your sake, she dismisses the harrowing thoughts +that would otherwise be her own; for your sake, she rallies her own +energies, which else might desert her; and when you are restored to her, +when, in those intervals of peace which are sometimes your own, she sees +you in health, and feels your constant devotion, believe me, there is a +well of comfort, of blessed comfort in her fond heart, of which nothing +can deprive her. For her sake, then, my dearest Mary, try to conquer +this reluctance to leave England. I do not reproach your grief, for I +know that it is natural. But endeavour to think that this residence for +a few years on the Continent, may restore your mother to a degree of +peace, which, in England, at present she cannot know; and will not this +thought, my love, reconcile you to a short separation from the land of +your birth, and the friends you so dearly love? We shall all think of +and love our Mary, however widely parted. We will write very frequently, +and every information I can obtain of your brother shall be faithfully +recorded. Mr. Hamilton has ever felt for your mother as a brother would, +and for her sake, her misguided son will be ever an object of his +dearest care. Do not fear for him, and endeavour to soothe your mother's +anxiety on that head also. Herbert has written to you, I enclose his +letter; and he entreats most earnestly that you will not only permit him +to continue to write, but answer him, during your residence abroad. He +has been deeply grieved at the intelligence we have reported of you, and +I hope and think, if your mother do not disapprove of your +correspondence, that the humble yet fervent faith which breathes in the +religion of my son may long prove a source of consolation as well as +interest to you, who, from your childhood, could sympathise with all his +exalted feelings. Poor Emmeline has shed many bitter tears over your +letter; she cannot bear to think of your leaving England, but yet agrees +with me in believing it will be a beneficial change for both yourself +and Mrs. Greville, but her letter shall speak her own feelings. I will +not write more now, but will very soon again. Do not exert yourself too +much to answer either Emmeline or myself; we will not wait for regular +replies. I have written to your mother also, therefore this brief +epistle is entirely for yourself, as you wished it. Mr. Hamilton will +meet you at Dover, which will afford me much satisfaction, as I shall +know more than I could ever learn by a letter, and he will, I trust, be +enabled to set your mother's heart at rest on some points which must be +now subjects of anxiety. God bless you, my Mary, and restore you +speedily to health and peace. + +Yours, with the warmest affection, + +E. HAMILTON. + + + + +CHAPTER II. + + +An early April sun was shining brightly through one of the windows of an +elegantly furnished boudoir of a distinguished-looking mansion, in the +vicinity of Piccadilly. There was somewhat in the aspect of the room, in +the variety of toys scattered on every side, in the selection of the +newest novels which were arranged on the table, and an indescribable air +which pervaded the whole, that might have aroused a suspicion, in any +keen observer who could discover character by trifles, that the lady to +whom that apartment belonged possessed not the very strongest or most +sensible mind. A taste which frivolous trifles could alone gratify +appeared evident; and the countenance of the lady, who was reclining +listlessly on the couch, would have confirmed these surmises. She did +not look above forty, if as much, but her features told a tale of +lassitude and weariness, at variance with the prime of life, which was +then her own. No intellect, no emotion was expressed on her countenance; +it never varied, except, perhaps, to denote peevishness or sullenness +when domestic affairs annoyed her, which appeared to be the case at +present. A volume of the last new novel was in her hand, in which she +appeared sufficiently interested as to feel still more annoyed at the +interruption she was constantly receiving from a young lady, who was +also an inmate of her room. + +Striking, indeed, was the contrast exhibited in the features of the +mother and daughter, for so nearly were they connected, and yet to some +the inanimate expression of the former would have been far preferable to +the handsome but scornful countenance of the latter. She could not have +been more than eighteen, but the expression of the features and the tone +of character were already decided to no ordinary degree. There was an +air of fashion in her every movement; an easy assurance and independence +of spirit which might have made her mother respected, but which in one +so young were intolerable to all save those whom she had contrived to +make her devoted admirers. Spite of the natural beauty of her face, +haughtiness, pride, and some of the baser passions of human nature, were +there visibly impressed; at least whenever she appeared in her natural +character, when no concealed designs caused her to veil these less +amiable emotions in eloquent smiles and a manner whose fascination was +felt and unresisted, even by those who perhaps had been before +prejudiced against her. Various were the characters she assumed in +society--assumed to suit her own purpose, made up of art; even at home +she sometimes found herself seeking for design, as if it were impossible +to go straightforward, to act without some reason. We shall find, +however, as we proceed, that she had one confidant at home, to whom, +when exhausted by the fatigue of planning, she would confess herself, +and who was generally the hearer and abettor of the young lady's +schemes. This was a person who had lived for many years in the family as +governess; although that office with the elder of her charges had ever +been but nominal, and with the younger it was neglected for the office +of friend and confidant, which Miss Malison very much preferred. + +It was evident this morning that the efforts of the young lady had not +succeeded quite so well as usual in veiling the discontent in which she +inwardly indulged. She was amusing herself at that moment in opening +every book on the table, glancing sulkily on their contents, and then +throwing them down again with a violence that not only had the effect of +making her mother start, but of disturbing the quiet repose of some of +the fragile toys in their vicinity, to the manifest danger of their +destruction. + +"I wish you would oblige me, Annie, by endeavouring to amuse yourself in +a quieter manner," observed her mother, in a very languid tone. "You +have no pity on my poor nerves. You know when I have these nervous +headaches, the least thing disturbs me." + +"You may be certain, mamma, it is reading that makes them worse, not my +noise. You had much better put away the book, and then you have some +chance of being free from them." + +"Will you read to me then instead? I assure you I should much prefer +it." + +"_I_ read aloud! I could not do it to please the most agreeable person +in the world; and as you are so very obliging to me in refusing so +decidedly to go with me to-night, you cannot expect I should oblige +you." + +Lady Helen Grahame's placid countenance gave no evidence of inward +disturbance at this undutiful speech; she was too much used to it, to +feel the pain it might otherwise have produced, and too indifferent to +be either indignant or displeased. + +"You are very ungrateful, Annie," she replied, in that same languid +tone, but with the very little expression in her voice, no emotion was +visible. "I tell you I will send round to Lady Charlton or the Countess +St. Aubyn; either of them, I know, will be very happy to chaperon you. +Surely you can let me be quiet for one evening." + +"Lady Charlton I cannot bear; she is the most detestable creature I +know. I would rather be buried alive in the country, than join in London +society under her care; with her long speeches of prudery and virtue, +and the modest reserve of young ladies, and a hundred other such +saint-like terms, when all the time she is doing all she can to catch +husbands for her three great gawky daughters, who in mamma's presence +are all simplicity and simper--sweet girls just introduced; when I am +very much mistaken if the youngest is not nearer thirty than twenty. And +as for Lady St. Aubyn, you know very well, mamma, papa declared I should +never go out with her again; it is just the same as if I were alone. She +has not a word or thought for any one but herself: she thinks she may +act with as much coquetry now as before she married. I do believe that +woman only married that she might be more at liberty and go out by +herself." + +"Then, if you like neither of them, write a note to Mrs. Hamilton. Your +father would be better pleased if you were to go under her care, than of +any other." + +"Mrs. Hamilton! I would not for worlds. Every pleasure I might +otherwise enjoy would vanish before the stern majesty of her presence. I +wonder how Caroline can bear the thraldom in which her mother holds +her--it is complete slavery." + +"I will not hear a word against Mrs. Hamilton," exclaimed Lady Helen, +with more display of feeling than had yet been perceivable. "She is a +truer friend both to your father and myself than any of those with whom +we associate here." + +"It is well you think so, my lady mother," replied Miss Grahame, in a +peculiar tone. "It is fortunate you are not troubled with jealousy, and +that this paragon of perfection, this Mrs. Hamilton, is your friend as +well as papa's. If I heard my husband so constantly extolling another +woman in my presence, I should not be quite so easy." + +If a flush rose to Lady Helen's pale cheek at these words, it was so +faint as scarcely to be perceivable, and she took no notice, except to +say-- + +"If your great desire to go to this ball is to be with Caroline the +first night of her _entrĂ©e_, I should think Mrs. Hamilton was the best +chaperon you could have." + +"I tell you, mother, I will not go with her. She has not bewitched me as +she has you and papa. If you would only be quiet for a few hours, I am +sure your head would be sufficiently well for you to go with me; and you +know I never do enjoy an evening so much as when you accompany me, dear +mamma," she continued, softening the violence with which she had at +first spoken into one of the most persuasive eloquence; and humbling her +pride and controlling the contempt with which she ever looked on her +weak but far more principled mother, she knelt on a low stool by her +side, and caressingly kissed Lady Helen's hand. + +"Dear mamma, you would oblige me, I am sure you would, if you knew how +much your presence contributes to my enjoyment. A ball is quite a +different thing when I feel I am under your wing, and you know papa +prefers my going out with you to any one else." + +Annie spoke truth, though her words appeared but flattery. The extreme +indolence of Lady Helen's natural disposition, which was now heightened +by the lassitude attendant on really failing health, rendered her merely +a chaperon in name. Annie felt very much more at liberty when with her +than with any other; she could act as she pleased, select her own +companions, coquette, talk, dance, without ever thinking of her mother +or being sought for by her, till the end of the evening. It was enough +she was with Lady Helen, to silence all gossiping tongues and to satisfy +her father, who, one of the most devoted members of the Lower House, +scarcely ever visited such places of amusement, and therefore knew not +the conduct of either his wife or daughter. He long since discovered his +authority was as nothing to his children; he felt most painfully his +sternness had alienated their affections, and he now rather shrunk from +their society; therefore, even at home he was a solitary man, and yet +Grahame was formed for all the best emotions, the warmest affections of +our nature. He was ignorant that his wife now very frequently suffered +from ill-health, for he had never seen her conduct different even when +in youth and perfectly well. Had he known this, and also the fact that, +though trembling at his sternness, she yet longed to receive some token +of his affection--that she really loved him, spite of the many faults +and the extreme weakness of her character, he might have been happy. + +Deceived by her daughter's manner, Lady Helen began to waver in the +positive refusal she had given to accompanying her, and Annie was not +slow in discovering her advantage; she continued the persuasions she +knew so well how to use, concealing the inward struggle it was to veil +her discontent at this unwonted humiliation, and suppressing the +violence that was ready to break forth, at length succeeded. Though +really feeling too languid for the exertion, the wavering mother could +not resist the unusually gentle manner of the persevering daughter, and +Miss Grahame flew to her confidant to impart the joyful tidings. + +Miss Malison was employed in endeavouring, by commands, exhortations, +and threats, to compel her pupil to practise a difficult sonata, which +her music-master had desired might be prepared by the time of his next +visit. Now it happened that Lilla Grahame had not the slightest taste +for music, and that Miss Malison did not possess the patient +perseverance requisite to smooth the difficulty of the task, nor the +gentleness necessary to render it more pleasing to her pupil; therefore, +in these practising lessons discord ever prevailed over harmony, and the +teacher was ever ready to seize the most trifling excuse to neglect her +office, and leave Lilla to practise or not as she pleased. + +"Malison, _chère_ Malison," exclaimed Annie, in a tone of glee, as she +entered, "do leave that stupid girl and come with me; I have some +charming intelligence to communicate. And it really is no use boring +yourself with Lilla; she will never play, try as hard as she can." + +"According to you, I shall do nothing," burst angrily from her sister's +lips, for her temper, naturally good, though somewhat hasty, had been +completely ruined by careless and mistaken treatment. "If I had been +properly taught, I should have done as others do: if Miss Malison had +chosen to take the same pains with me as Miss Harcourt does with +Emmeline and Ellen, I should have been a very different girl." + +"Insolent, ungrateful girl! do you dare to say I have neglected my +duty?" exclaimed the _gouvernante_, enraged beyond bounds at this +display of insubordination in one whose spirit she had left no means +untried to bend to her will, and forgetting herself in the passion of +the moment, enforced her words by what is termed a sound box on the ear. + +"Now go and tell mamma, pretty dear; or papa, if you like it better," +Miss Grahame said, in a whining tone. + +But Lilla answered her not. A crimson flush for the moment spread over +her very temples at the infliction of this indignity, which very quickly +gave way to a deadly, almost livid paleness, on which the marks of Miss +Malison's ready fingers were the only spots of red. Without a word in +reply, she hastily rose from the piano and left the room. + +"Will she _blab_?" was the elegant question that was asked as the door +closed. + +"Not she," replied Annie, laughing. "She dare not tell papa, and she +knows it is of no use appealing to mamma, who implicitly believes all +you tell her of Miss Lilla's excessive obstinacy, idleness, and +passionate temper in which she so constantly indulges; your deep regrets +that either of Lady Helen Grahame's daughters should be such a character +have succeeded so admirably. I have had such a struggle to obtain +mamma's promise to go with me to-night, that I really feel exhausted," +and the young lady threw herself in a most graceful attitude of +listlessness on a sofa that stood invitingly beside lier. + +"But have you succeeded?" + +"Admirably! at length mamma thinks I am most amiable. My persuasions +were so eloquent, that the most obdurate person could not have resisted +them. I tried violence and sulkiness at first, thinking to frighten or +worry her into compliance; but finding both fail, I was compelled to +have recourse to humiliation and persuasion. If it had continued much +longer, I should have choked by the way; it is quite a relief to breathe +freely again. What do you think of her wishing me to go under the care +of Mrs. Hamilton to-night? I really could hardly control my horror at +the idea." + +"Horrible, indeed! What would have become of all your plans, if you +had?" + +"My dear creature, I would not have gone with her for worlds; but, +however, I think my plans are in too good training for one night spent +under her eyes to injure them. Caroline is beginning, I think, to feel +somewhat like a slave under this keen _surveillance_ of her paragon +mother, and to pine for the freedom of thought and act which I so +unboundedly enjoy. She only wants a little of my good advice and better +example, to become really a girl of spirit." + +"But take care the spirit you are calling forth does not turn against +you," observed Miss Malison. + +"Not at all likely, _ma chère_. I am careful only to excite it to serve +my own purposes. She likes me, I believe, and I can make her what I +please. Let her confidence in her mother be once destroyed, you will see +if she does not act as foolishly as I can desire. She has been buried in +the country so long, she is a mere infant with regard to all that +concerns a life of fashion; and, therefore, will be gladly led by one +she considers so completely _au fait_ at its mysteries as myself. I used +to like her in the country, because she always listened so eagerly to +all I said about London. I saw she envied me even when we were children, +and therefore fancied myself a most important personage." + +"And do you like her now?" + +"You are laughing at me, _chère_ Malison. You know I cannot bear a +rival, and this girl's dazzling beauty will completely cast me in the +shade." + +"You don't mean to say her beauty can be compared to yours?" interrupted +Miss Malison. + +"Perhaps not in the sterling worth of the two," replied Annie, glancing +complacently on a large mirror; "but she is new, Malison--quite new. Her +mother only kept her so long away that she might shine with greater +brilliancy when introduced. As for Caroline, I like her, as far as she +assists my plans, and by her silly, or, if that would serve me better, +criminal conduct, takes somewhat away from her mother's perfection, and +by the pain Mrs. Hamilton will feel, gratify my overpowering +detestation. Malison, you look delighted. Your assistance I am sure of, +if I require it; for you dislike this paragon of her sex almost as much +as I do." + +"Indeed I do. I have never forgotten nor forgiven her presumption a year +or two ago, in hinting so broadly I was mistaken in my treatment of +Lilla, and that gentleness would have much better effect; gentleness +indeed, with a girl that would tire the patience of a saint. She is +always worse after having been with this Mrs. Hamilton, and I suppose it +will be all over again now. I wish, with your charming plans, my dear +Miss Grahame, you would find one to prevent all intercourse between the +Hamiltons and your sister." + +"At present, _ma chère_, such a thing is out of my power, but we will +not despair; although the more you would say about Miss Lilla being +undeserving of such indulgence, the more papa would answer, let her go +and she will learn to be better there. I heard him give mamma peremptory +orders the other day, when we prevented her going, never to refuse +whenever Mrs. Hamilton invited her. Severity is a most admirable method, +my good Malison; you will break her spirit if you persevere, +notwithstanding all the amiable Mrs. Hamilton may do or say." + +"I wish I may; but you have not told me all yet. How proceed your +schemes with Lord Alphingham?" + +"To perfection! I have given Caroline a distaste for every other kind of +person. She has met him, you know, once or twice here, and that was +sufficient to fascinate her. She thinks him the handsomest and most +delightful man she ever knew. It is enough for Mr. Hamilton to see him a +friend of papa's to be attracted towards him; in all probability he will +be introduced at his house, and then my scheme will be still easier. It +will not be difficult to talk Caroline into fancying herself desperately +in love with him, and he with her--he is already attracted; and when I +see the aspect of affairs favourable, I will just get some kind friend +to whisper into Mrs. Hamilton's ear some of the pretty tales I have +heard of this Viscount, and you will see what will follow. These _on +dits_ are, fortunately for my plans, only known among my coterie. With +us, they only render Lord Alphingham more interesting; but with Mrs. +Hamilton they would have the effect of banishing him for ever from her +presence and from the notice of her daughter; the catastrophe, my dear +creature, shall be the perfection of diplomacy, but of that hereafter. I +owe Lord Alphingham a spite, which I will pay off one day, for his +desertion of me the moment Caroline appeared. I may do all I wish with, +one word. All my present intention is, by a gradual yet sure process, to +undermine Caroline's confidence in her mother, and make me her confidant +instead, and if I do that, the rest is easy." + +"You know you have never failed in any scheme, therefore you may feel +secure in this," replied Miss Malison, with ready flattery; for she knew +Miss Grahame's love of designing, and really felt gratified at any plan +tending to injure Mrs. Hamilton, whom she detested with all the +malevolence of a mean and grovelling mind, which despised the virtue +that was too exalted for its comprehension. + +Some little time longer this amiable pair conversed, but their further +conversation it is needless to record. We have already seen that +Emmeline Hamilton's prejudice against Annie Grahame was not unfounded, +and that at present is enough. Before, however, we quit Lady Helen's +mansion, we may say a few words on the character of Lilla, in whom, it +may be recollected, Mrs. Hamilton had ever felt interest sufficient to +indulge a hope that she might render her one day a greater comfort to +her father than either of his other children. As a child, her temper was +naturally good, though somewhat hasty and self-willed; high-spirited, +but affectionate to a degree that would have made the task of training +and instruction easy to any one who possessed sufficient gentleness to +win her affection, and with patience, yet firmness, to guide her in the +right way. Unfortunately, Miss Malison possessed neither; extremely +passionate herself, where her interests did not interfere to control it, +she was not at all the person to guide a passionate child. Severity was +her weapon, and every means used to break the spirit, which she could +plainly perceive would soon endeavour to throw off her control. Lilla +revolted at this treatment, and many evil qualities were thus introduced +in her disposition, which, when they fell under her eye, Mrs. Hamilton +was convinced were completely the fruits of mistaken management. From +being merely hasty, her passionate anger and hatred of her governess had +now increased to such height, as to be really alarming not only to her +weak-minded mother, but to Mrs. Hamilton, who, however, was certainly +never aware of their extent; for before her Lilla was generally gentle +and controlled. Something always occurred to call forth these bursts of +passion in Lady Helen's presence, and consequently, the actual conduct +of Lilla confirmed the statement of Miss Malison, as to her violence and +other evil qualities. Mr. Grahame, too, was compelled to believe all +that was told him, and his sternness towards his unhappy child +frequently caused her to fly from his presence in dread; although her +warm heart yearned towards him with such deep affection, which could he +have guessed one-half of its extent, would have twined her fondly round +his heart, and forced him to examine more strictly than he did the +conduct of Miss Malison. Lilla's dislike to her more favoured sister was +almost as violent as that she bore to her governess; and the conviction +that all her mother's family looked on her as a passionate, evil-minded +girl, of course, increased every bitter feeling. Often, very often, did +Mrs. Hamilton long to implore Mr. Grahame to dismiss Miss Malison, and +place Lilla under the care of some lady more fitted for the task; but +she felt that such advice might be looked upon with some justice by Lady +Helen's friends as most unwarrantable interference. Miss Malison had +been most highly recommended to Lady Helen by her mother, the Duchess of +----, and as, in the opinion of that branch of the family, Annie +abundantly displayed the good effects of her management, it was very +naturally supposed that Lilla's opposite character proceeded from an +innate evil disposition, and not from any fault in her governess. She +was now nearly fourteen and each year Mrs. Hamilton's hopes for the +future worth of her character became fainter; yet still she determined +to do all in her power to counteract Miss Malison's plans, and subdue +Lilla's fearful passions, and those longings for revenge, not only on +her governess but her sister, which, by many little things, she could +perceive were lurking round her heart. Montrose Grahame had been, as we +already know, from his earliest youth the intimate friend of Mr. +Hamilton, and, notwithstanding the increasing cares of their respective +families, this friendship had continued and, if possible, increased, and +Mrs. Hamilton sharing the sentiments of her husband, the qualities of +Grahame speedily caused him to become her friend likewise. She had ever +seen with regret his sternness to his children, she saw also that he was +pained, deeply pained, as their characters became more matured; and, +spite of the difficulties of the task, her benevolent mind determined to +leave no means untried to make one child at least his comfort. Lilla's +affection for her was as violent as her other feelings, and on that she +resolved at first to work. It was strange too, how devotedly attached +this wild and headstrong girl became, to one, who of all others appeared +least suited to her, and that one the mild and pensive Ellen. It +appeared as if it were a relief to meet one so widely different to +herself, and therefore she loved her. The high spirits and animation of +Emmeline appeared less congenial to her affections than the gentle +sweetness of Ellen. Caroline was Annie's friend, and that was enough for +her; not even her being Mrs. Hamilton's daughter could make her an +object of interest. On the day we have mentioned, Lilla had sat for +above an hour in her room; indignation at the insult she had received +swelling in every vein, and longing with sickening intensity for some +means to free herself from such galling thraldom. She did not give vent +to her injured feelings in tears, but her countenance so clearly +expressed the emotions of her heart, that it actually startled a servant +who entered with a message--a request from Mrs. Hamilton, that her young +friend would spend that evening with her daughter and niece. Lilla +started up with a wild exclamation of delight, and the anticipation of +the evening hours enabled her to obey with haughty calmness the summons +of Miss Malison. Before, however, she departed on her visit, a fresh +ebullition had taken place between the sisters in the presence of their +mother, to the great terror of Lady Helen, whose irritation at Lilla's +violence increased, as she could perceive nothing in Annie's words or +manner to call for it. Had she been less indolent, she might easily have +discovered that her elder daughter never permitted a single opportunity +to escape without eliciting Lilla's irritability. As it was, she coldly +rejected the offered caresses the really affectionate girl would have +lavished on her, as she wished her good night, and therefore it was with +a heart bursting with many mingled emotions she sought the happy home of +her beloved friends. + +There gladly will we follow her, for the scenes of violence and evil +passion we have slightly touched on are not subjects on which we love to +linger. + + + + +CHAPTER III. + + +There was thought, deep thought, engraved on Mrs. Hamilton's expressive +countenance, as she sat beside a small table, her head leaning on her +hand, anxious, perhaps even painful, visions occupying her reflective +mind. The evening was gradually darkening into twilight, but still she +did not move, nor was it till a well-known tap sounded at the door, and +her husband stood before her, that she looked up. + +"Will you not let your husband share these anxious thoughts, my +Emmeline?" he said, as he gazed earnestly on her face. + +"My husband may perhaps think them silly and unfounded fancies," she +replied, with a faint smile. + +"He is so prone to do so," answered Mr. Hamilton, in an accent of +playful reproach; "but if you will not tell me, I must guess them--you +are thinking of our Caroline?" + +"Arthur, I am," she said, with almost startling earnestness; "oh, you +cannot tell how anxiously! I know not whether I am right to expose her +to the temptations of the world; I know her disposition, I see the evils +that may accrue from it, and yet, even as if I thought not of their +existence, I expose her to them. Oh, my husband, can this be right? can +I be doing a parent's duty?" + +"We should not, my beloved, be fulfilling the duties of our station, did +we not sometimes mingle in society: all our duty is not comprised in +domestic life. It is when we retain our integrity unsullied, our +restraining principles unchanged in the midst of temptations, that we +show forth, even to the thoughtless, the spirit that actuates us, and by +example may do good. Besides, remember, dearest, we are not about to +enter into continued and incessant dissipation, which occupies the +existence of so many; we have drawn a line, and Caroline loves her +parents too well to expect or wish to pass its boundary. Remember, too, +the anxious fears which were yours when Percy was about to enter into +scenes of even stronger temptation than those which will surround his +sister; and have they had foundation? Has not the influence of his +mother followed him there, and restrained him even at the moment of +trial, and will not the influence of that mother do the same for +Caroline?" + +"Percy is, indeed, all my heart could wish," replied Mrs. Hamilton, +still somewhat sadly; "but his disposition is different to that of +Caroline's. I know his confidence in me is such, and his affection so +strong, that for my sake he would do more than those who but slightly +know him would imagine. When a son really loves his mother, it is a +different, perhaps a more fervid, feeling than that ever known by a +daughter. He feels bound to protect, to cherish, and that very knowledge +of power heightens his affections." + +"You do not doubt your daughters' love, my Emmeline? must I accuse you +of injustice too?" + +"No, dearest Arthur, I do not doubt their love; for my Emmeline I do not +tremble. Her confidence I shall never lose; her affections, however I +may be called upon to exert my authority, will never waver, and +completely opposite as are the feelings with which she and Percy regard +me, their love may be equally intense. But forgive me, my dear husband, +I may be unjust, and if I am may my child forgive me; I am not--oh, that +I were--equally confident in my Caroline. She loves me, but that +affection, I know, does not prevent her thinking me harsh and unkind, if +my wishes interfere with hers. My authority is not the same with her as +it is to her sister and cousin. She seeks another confidential friend +besides her mother, for she dreads my opinions differing from hers. I +have marked her thus in early childhood, and it still exists, though her +temper is more controlled, her disposition, more improved. The last few +years she has been thrown almost entirely with me, and not much above a +twelvemonth since she shrunk from the idea of confiding in any one as +she did in me." + +"And while that confidence exists, my Emmeline, you surely have no +right to fear." + +"But it is waning, Arthur. The last month I know, I feel it is +decreasing. She is no longer the same open-hearted girl with me as she +was so lately at Oakwood. She is withdrawing her confidence from her +mother, to bestow it on one whom I feel assured is unworthy of it." + +"Nay, Emmeline, your anxiety must be blinding you; you are too anxious." + +His wife answered him not in words, but she raised her expressive eyes +to his face, and he saw they were filled with tears. + +"Nay, nay, my beloved!" he exclaimed, as he folded her to his bosom, +struck with sudden self-reproach. "Have my unkind words called forth +these tears? forgive me, my best love; I think I love my children, but I +know not half the depths of a mother's tenderness, my Emmeline, nor that +clear-sightedness which calls for disquietude so much sooner in her +gentle heart than in a father's. But can we in no way prevent the growth +of that intimacy of which I know you disapprove?" + +"No, my dearest Arthur, it must now take its course. Pain as it is to +me, I will not rudely check my child's affections, _that_ will not bring +them back to me. She may, one day, discover her error, and will then +gladly return to that love, that tenderness, of which she now thinks but +lightly. I must endeavour to wait till that day comes, with all the +patience I can teach my heart to feel," she added, with a smile. +"Perhaps I am demanding more than is my due. It is not often we find +young girls willing to be contented with their mother only as a friend; +they pine for novelty, for companions of their own age, whom they +imagine can sympathise better in their feelings. A child is all in all +to a mother, though a parent is but one link in the life of a child; yet +my children have so long looked on me as a friend, that, perhaps, I feel +this loss of confidence the more painfully." + +"But you will regain it, my Emmeline; our Caroline is only dazzled now, +she will soon discover the hollowness of Annie's professions of +everlasting friendship." + +Mrs. Hamilton shook her head. + +"I doubt it, my dear husband. The flattering warmth with which Annie +first met Caroline has disappointed me. I thought and hoped that here, +surrounded by all her fashionable acquaintances, she would rather have +neglected her former friends, and Caroline's pride taking umbrage, their +intimacy would have been at once dissolved. Instead of this, Annie never +fails to treat her with the most marked distinction, evidently appearing +to prefer her much above her other friends; and, therefore, as in this +instance Caroline has found my warnings and suspicions needless and +unjust, she is not likely to permit my opinion of Annie to gain much +ascendancy." + +"But deceived as we have been in this instance, my dear Emmeline, may we +not be so in other points of Annie's character? She is evidently devoted +to fashion and fashionable pleasures, but still there may be some good +qualities lurking round her heart, which her intimacy with Caroline may +bring forward." + +"I hope it may be so," replied Mrs. Hamilton, fervently, though somewhat +doubtingly. "For her father's sake, as well as that of my child's, I +wish her disposition may be different to that which I, perhaps +uncharitably, believe it. You must give me a portion of your sanguine +and trusting hopes, my dearest Arthur," she continued, fondly laying her +hand in his. + +Mr. Hamilton returned a playful answer, and endeavoured to turn the +thoughts of his wife to other and more pleasurable subjects. Anxiety +such as hers could not be entirely dispelled, but it was lessened, for +she had imparted it to her husband, and his watchful care would combine +with her own to guard their child. + +Very different were Caroline's feelings on this important night. Mrs. +Hamilton's fears and Annie's hopes were both well founded. We have known +the character of Caroline from a child; and though the last three or +four years it had so improved, that at Oakwood, Mrs. Hamilton had +ventured to banish fear, and indulge in every pleasing hope, yet there +was a degree of pride still remaining, that revolted very frequently +from the counsels even of her mother; that high and independent spirit +sometimes in secret longed to throw off the very slight restraint in +which she felt held at home. She could not bear to feel that she was in +any way controlled; she longed for the exercise of power, and by the +display of that beauty, those qualities, she knew she possessed, force +herself to be acknowledged as a girl of far more consequence than she +appeared to be when in the quiet halls of Oakwood. There nothing ever +occurred to call these feelings forth, but they were only dormant, and +in London they obtained much greater sway. She felt more controlled than +ever by her mother. Secretly she pined to free herself from that which +she magnified into thraldom, but which was but the watchful tenderness +of a devoted parent; and when the representations, sympathy, and +persuasions of Annie were listened to, no wonder these feelings +increased. Cautiously Miss Grahame had worked: she continually spoke of +the freedom she enjoyed; she introduced her friend to some young ladies +who were continually speaking of the delights of independence both in +act and word. Once introduced, they said they were emancipated from the +labour of the schoolroom, they could employ themselves as they liked, go +out when they pleased, and their mothers never interfered with their +amusements, except to see that they were becomingly dressed, chaperon +them to balls, and second all their efforts at fascination. + +The restraint which, when compared with these, Caroline could not but +feel was hers at home, of course became more and more intolerable. In +confidence, she imparted to Annie her discontent. For the first time she +confided in another, feelings she shrunk from imparting to her mother, +and once such a confidential intimacy commenced, she neither could nor +would draw back. Annie artfully appeared to soothe, while in reality she +heightened the discontent and even indignation of her friend. Yes; +Caroline by slow degrees became even indignant at the conduct of that +mother whose every thought, whose most fervent prayer was for the +happiness of her children; and she looked to this night as the beginning +of a new era, when she allowed herself to hope, with the assistance of +Annie, she would gradually escape from control, and act as other girls +of spirit did. + +There was another subject on which, by the advice of Annie, Caroline +carefully refrained from speaking at home, and that was Lord Alphingham, +a handsome and elegant viscount, who it may be remembered had been +mentioned in Annie's conversation with Miss Malison; and yet it would +appear strange that such was Miss Grahame's counsel, when Mr. Hamilton +frequently spoke of the viscount with every mark of approbation due to +his public conduct; of his private little was known, and still less +inquired. He was famous in the Upper House--an animated and eloquent +speaker--seconding and aiding with powerful influence all Grahame's +endeavours in the Lower House, and rendering himself to the latter a +most able and influential friend. His brilliant qualities, both as a +member of parliament and of polite society, rendered him universally +courted; yet notwithstanding this, Mr. Hamilton had never invited him to +his house. + +"His public character, as far at least as it meets our eye, is +unquestionably worthy of admiration," he had said one day to his wife, +"but I know nothing more; of his private character and conduct I am and +must remain ignorant, and therefore I will not expose my children to the +fascination of his society in the intimacy of home." + +Mrs. Hamilton had agreed with him, but it required not the "intimacy of +home" to give Annie an opportunity of persuading Caroline towards +secretly accepting his attentions, and making an impression in his +favour on her heart; and the latter looked to her _entrĂ©e_ with the more +pleasure, as she hoped, and with some justice, it would give her many +more opportunities of meeting him than she now enjoyed. She saw before +her, in imagination, a long train of captives whom she would enslave, +still Lord Alphingham in all stood pre-eminent; and visions of varied +nature, but all equally brilliant, floated before her eyes, as she +prepared for the grand ball which, for the first time in her life, she +was about to join. + +The business of the toilette was completed, and we might forgive the +proud smile of exultation which curled round her lip, as she gazed on +the large pier glass which reflected her whole figure. The graceful +folds of the rich white silk that formed her robe suited well with the +tall and commanding form they encircled. The radiant clasp of diamonds +securing the braid of pearls which twined the dark glossy hair, +glittered with unusual brilliancy on that noble yet haughty brow, and +heightened the dazzling beauty of her countenance. The dark eyes +sparkling with animation, her cheek possessing the rose of buoyant youth +and health, the Grecian nose, the lip, which even pride could not rob of +its beauty, all combined to form a face lovely indeed. Fanny had gazed +and admired her young lady with suppressed exclamations of delight, +which were strangely at variance with the sigh that at that instant +sounded on Caroline's ear; she turned hastily and beheld her mother, who +was gazing on her with looks of such excessive tenderness, that a +strange pang of self-reproach darted through her heart, although it was +instantly banished by the fancy, that if it was with a sigh her mother +regarded her on such a night, how could she look for sympathy in the +pleasure then occupying her mind. At Oakwood every feeling, every +anticipation would have been instantly imparted, but now she only longed +to meet Annie, that to her all might be told without restraint. Painful, +indeed, was this unwonted silence of a child to the fond heart of Mrs. +Hamilton, but she refused to notice it. Much, very much, did she wish +to say, but she saw by the countenance of her daughter it might be +considered mistimed; yet to launch the beautiful girl she saw before her +into the labyrinth of the world, without uttering one word of the +thoughts which were thronging on her mind, she felt was impossible. They +might not have the effect she wished, yet she would do her duty. +Desiring Fanny to take her young lady's shawl down stairs, she gently +detained Caroline as she was about to follow her. + +"Listen to me but for a few minutes, my love," she said, in that +affectionate yet impressive tone, which seldom failed to arrest the +attention of her children, "and forgive me, if my words fall harshly and +coldly on your excited fancy. I know well the feelings that are yours, +though you perhaps think I do not, by the involuntary sigh you heard, +and I can sympathise with them, though lately you have refused to seek +my sympathy. Bright as are your anticipations, reality for a time will +be still brighter. Brilliant will be the scenes of enchantment in which +you will mingle,--brilliant indeed, for you are beautiful, my +Caroline--and admiration on all sides will be your own. Why should you +look on me with surprise, my child? that beauty on which perhaps my +heart has often dwelt too proudly, is not my gift nor of your creation. +The Great Being who has given you those charms of face and form will +mark how His gift is used; and oh, forget not for one moment His +all-seeing eye is as much upon you in the crowded ball as in the +retirement of your own room. You will be exposed to more temptations +than have yet been yours; the most dangerous temptations, adulation, +triumph, exciting pleasures of every kind, will be around you. The +world in radiant beauty will loudly call upon you to follow it alone, to +resign all things to become its votary; the trial of prosperity will +indeed be yours. Caroline, my child, for my sake, if not for your own, +resist them all. My happiness is in your hands. Seek your God in this +ordeal, even more than you would in that of adversity; there the spirit +naturally flies from earth, here it clings tenaciously to the world. +Pray to Him to resist the temptations that will surround--implore him to +teach you the best use of those charms He has bestowed on you. Forsake +him not; Caroline, I conjure you, be not drawn away from Him. Do not let +your thoughts be so wholly engrossed by pleasure as to prevent your +bestowing on Him but one hour of your day. Let me clasp my child to my +heart, when we return to Oakwood, unsullied, untouched by the stains of +the world. Let me have the blessed comfort of seeing my Caroline return +to the home of her childhood the same innocent happy being she was when +she left. I have ever endeavoured to make you happy, to give you those +pleasures you naturally desire, to form your character not only for the +happiness of this world, but for that of the next; then if you are ever +tempted to do wrong, if no higher consideration bids you pause, think on +your mother, Caroline; remember my happiness or misery greatly depends +on you, and, oh, if you have ever loved me, pause ere you proceed." + +"Mother, do not doubt me; Caroline Hamilton will never sully the name +she bears," replied Caroline, her eye flashing, and speaking proudly, to +conceal the emotion her mother's words had involuntarily produced. + +Mrs. Hamilton gazed on the haughty and satisfied security the features +of her child expressed. A more softened feeling would at that moment +better have pleased the yearning heart of the mother, but she checked +the rising sigh of disappointment, and folding Caroline to her bosom, +she imprinted a fond kiss on her noble brow, and murmuring, "God in +heaven bless you, my child, and grant you sufficient strength," they +descended the stairs together. + +Brilliant indeed was the scene that met the dazzled eyes of Caroline, as +she entered the elegant suite of rooms of the Duchess of Rothbury. The +highest rank, the greatest talent, the loveliest of beauty's daughters, +the manliest and noblest of her sons, were all assembled in that flood +of light which every apartment might be termed. Yet could the varied +countenances of these noble crowds have clearly marked the character +within, what a strange and varied page in the book of human life might +that ball have unfolded. + +But various as are the characters that compose an assemblage such as +this, the tone is generally given by the character and manner of the +lady of the house, and her Grace the Duchess of Rothbury was admirably +fitted for the position she filled. A daughter of fashion, bred up from +her earliest years in scenes of luxury and pomp, she had yet escaped the +selfishness, the artificial graces, which are there generally +predominant. She had married early in life, a marriage _Ă la mode_, that +is to say, not of love, but of interest on the part of her parents, and +on her own, dazzled, perhaps, by the exalted rank of the man who had +made her an offer of his hand. They were happy. The highly-principled +mind of the Duchess revolted from that conduct which would, even in the +_on dit_ of a censorious world, have called the very faintest whisper +on her name; and her husband, struck by the unwavering honour and +integrity of her conduct, gradually deserted the haunts of ignoble +pleasures which he had been wont to frequent, and paid her those marks +of consideration and respect, both in public and private life, which she +so greatly deserved. A large family had been the fruits of this union, +all of whom, except her two youngest daughters and two of her sons, were +married, and to the satisfaction of their parents. There was a degree of +reserve, amounting to severity, in the character of the Duchess, which +prevented that same affectionate confidence between her and her children +as subsisted in Mr. Hamilton's family. Yet she had been a kind and +careful mother, and her children ever proved, that surrounded as she +constantly was by the fashionable and the gay, she had presided over the +education of her daughters, and been more than usually particular in the +choice of governesses. Violent as she might be considered in her +prejudices for and against, yet there was that in her manner which alike +prevented the petty feelings of dislike and envy, and equally debarred +her from being regarded with any of that warm affection, for which no +one imagined how frequently she had pined. She stood alone, respected, +by many revered, and she was now content with this, though her youth had +longed for somewhat more. Her chosen friend, spite of the difference of +rank, had been Mr. Hamilton's mother, and she had watched with the +jealousy of true friendship the object of Arthur Hamilton's love. + +A brief yet penetrating survey of Emmeline Manvers' character she took, +and was satisfied. The devotion of Mrs. Hamilton, for so many years, to +her children she had ever admired, and frequently defended her with +warmth when any one ventured before her to condemn her conduct. Mr. and +Mrs. Hamilton regarded her with reverence and affection, and were +gratified at that kindness which insisted that the _entrĂ©e_ of Caroline +should take place at her house. + +The Earl and Countess Elmore were also pre-eminent among the +guests--young, noble, exquisitely lovely, the latter at once riveted all +eyes, yet by the graceful dignity of her manner, repelled all advances +of familiarity. She might have been conscious of her charms, she could +not fail to be, but she only valued them as having attracted towards her +the man she loved. She only used them to endear him to his home; and it +was when alone with the Earl, that the sweet playfulness of her +character was displayed to its full extent, and scarcely could he then +believe her the same being who in society charmed as much by her dignity +and elegance, as by her surpassing beauty. The family of the Marquis of +Malvern were also present; they had been long known to Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton, who were glad to resume an intimacy which had been checked by +their retirement, but which had ever been remembered with mutual +pleasure. The Earl of St. Eval, eldest son of the Marquis, might have +been thought by many, who only knew him casually, as undeserving of the +high renown he enjoyed; and many young ladies would have wondered at +Emmeline Hamilton's undisguised admiration. Handsome he certainly was +not; yet intelligence and nobleness were stamped upon that broad +straight, brow, and those dark eyes were capable at times of speaking +the softest emotions of the human heart. But it was only when he +permitted himself to speak with energy that his countenance was +displayed to advantage, and then the bright rays of intellect and +goodness which gilded every feature, aided by the eloquent tones of his +full rich voice, would have made the most careless turn and look again, +and ask why they admired; but such times were few. Reserved, almost +painfully so, he was generally prone in such scenes as this to stand +alone, for few indeed were those of either sex with whom the soul of +Eugene St. Eval could hold commune; but this night there was more +animation than usual glittering in his dark eyes. He was the first of +the admiring crowd to join Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton's party, and petition +for the hand of Caroline in the next quadrille. It was with a smile of +proud satisfaction her father relinquished her to the young man, for she +had consented, although the watchful eye of her mother observed her +glance round the room, as if in search for some other, and a shade of +disappointment pass over her brow, that said her search was fruitless; +that feeling was but momentary, however. She joined the festive throng, +and her young heart beat quicker as she met the many glances of +undisguised admiration fixed constantly upon her. Seldom had Mr. +Hamilton been so beset as he was that night by the number of young men +who pressed forward to implore him for an introduction to his beautiful +daughter; and Caroline's every anticipation of triumph was indeed +fulfilled. Her mother was right. Reality was in this case far more +dazzling than even imagination had been. There were many in that +splendid scene equally, perhaps even more beautiful than Caroline +Hamilton, but she possessed the charm of which almost all around her +were deprived, that of novelty. She was, indeed, a novice amid scenes of +fashion, and the genuine pleasure her countenance expressed, appeared a +relief when compared to many around her. The name of Hamilton had never +been entirely forgotten in London. Their singularity in living so long +in unbroken retirement had been by many ridiculed, by others condemned, +as an attempt to appear better than their neighbours; and many were the +speculations as to whether the saintly Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton would +really do such a wicked thing as introduce their daughters into society, +or whether they would keep the poor girls in the country like nuns, to +be moped to death. Great, therefore, was the astonishment of some, and +equally great the pleasure to others, when Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton +reappeared amongst their London friends; and that night the warm +greetings of many old friends who thronged around them, eager to +introduce to their notice the young members of their families, afforded +a pleasing satisfaction to the heart of Mrs. Hamilton, whose gentle +courtesy and winning smile they found had not in the least deserted her. +The feelings of a mother swelled warmly within her as she gazed on her +child; her fond heart throbbed with chastened pride, as she marked the +unfeigned and respectful admiration Caroline received, and these +emotions, combined with the pleasure she felt at beholding again +well-remembered faces, and hearing the glad tones of eager greeting, +caused this evening to be equally as pleasurable to her, though in a +different way, as it was to Caroline. + +The attentions of Eugene St. Eval to Miss Hamilton continued as +unintermitting as they were respectful the whole of that night; and +Caroline, if she did not encourage, certainly forbade them not. She +listened to him with more attention; she appeared more animated with him +than with any of her other partners, one perhaps, alone excepted, and +yet she had taught her young heart to receive impressions to his +prejudice, which Annie never permitted an opportunity to pass without +carefully instilling. Why did she then permit his attentions? She knew +not; while listening to his voice, there was a fascination about him she +could not resist, but in her solitary hours she studiously banished his +image to give place to one whom, by the representations of Annie, she +persuaded herself that she loved alone. + +Genuine, indeed, had been the enjoyment of Caroline Hamilton, from the +first moment she had entered the ball-room; but if it could be +heightened, it was when, about the middle of the evening, Lord +Alphingham entered. A party of gay young men instantly surrounded him, +but breaking from them all, he attached himself the greater part of the +night to Mr. Hamilton. Only two quadrilles he danced with Caroline, but +they were enough to aid the schemes of Annie. She was at hand to excite, +to an almost painful degree, the mind of her friend, to speak in +rapturous praise of Lord Alphingham, to chain him now and then to her +side, and yet so contrive, that the whole of his conversation was with +Caroline; and yet the conduct of Annie Grahame had been such that night +as rather to excite the admiration than the censure of Mr. Hamilton. +Playfully he combated the prejudice of his wife, who as sportively owned +that Miss Grahame's conduct in society was different to that she had +anticipated; but her penetrative mind felt not the more at ease when she +thought on the friendship that subsisted between Annie and her child. + +"Am I dreaming, or is it Mrs. Hamilton I again behold?" exclaimed an +elderly gentleman, as she came forward, and hastily advancing, seized +both her hands, and pressed them with unfeigned warmth and pleasure, +which greeting Mrs. Hamilton as cordially returned. He was a very old +friend of her father's, and had attained by promotion his present high +rank of Admiral of the Blue, but had been the first captain under whose +orders her lamented brother sailed. Very many, therefore, were the +associations that filled her mind as she beheld him, and her mild eyes +for a moment glistened in uncontrollable emotion. + +"How very many changes have taken place since we have come alongside, +Mrs. Hamilton," the old veteran said, gazing on the blooming matron +before him with almost paternal pleasure. "Poor Delmont! could his kind +heart have borne up against the blow of poor Charles's fate, he surely +would have been happy, if all the tales I hear of his daughter Emmeline +be true." + +"Come and judge for yourself, Sir George; my home must ever be open to +my father's dearest friend," replied Mrs. Hamilton, endeavouring by +speaking playfully to conceal the painful reminiscences called forth by +his words. "I will not vouch for the truth of anything you may have +heard about us in London. You must contrive to moor your ship into the +harbour of Oakwood, and thus gratify us all." + +"Ay, ay; take care that I do not cast anchor there so long, that you +will find the best thing will be to cut the cables, send me adrift, and +thus get rid of me," replied the old sailor, delighted at her addressing +him in nautical phrase. "Your appearance here has belied half the +stories I heard; so now that you have given me permission, I shall set +sail to discover the truth of the rest." + +"You heard, I suppose, that Mr. Hamilton never intended his children to +visit London? They were too good, too--what may I term it?--too perfect, +to mingle with their fellow-creatures; is not that it, Admiral?" +demanded Mrs. Hamilton, with a smile. + +"Ay, ay; something very like it,--but glad to see the wind is changed +from that corner. Don't like solitude, particularly for young +folks,--and how many are here?" + +"Of my children?" The veteran nodded. "But one, my eldest girl. I do not +consider her sister quite old enough to be introduced." + +"And you left her in harbour, and only permitted one frigate to cruise. +If she had any of her uncle Charles's spirit, she would have shown some +little insubordination at that piece of discipline, Mrs. Hamilton," said +the old man, joyously. + +"Not if my authority is established somewhat like Sir George's, on the +basis of affection," replied Mrs. Hamilton, again smiling. + +"Ay, you have learnt that secret of government, have you? Now who would +think this was the little quiet girl I had dandled on my knee, and told +her tales of storm and war that made her shudder? And where are your +sons?" + +"Both at college." + +"What, neither of them a chip of the old block, and neither of them for +the sea? Don't like their taste. No spirit of salt-water within them." + +"But neither of them deficient in spirit for a life on shore. But, +however, to set your heart at ease, for the naval honour of our family, +Sir George, I have a nephew, who, I think, some few years hence will +prove a brave and gallant son of Neptune. The accounts we have of him +are most pleasing. He has inherited all poor Charles's spirit and +daring, as well as that true courage, for which you have said my brother +was so remarkable." + +"Glad of it--glad of it; but what nephew? who is he? A nephew of Mr. +Hamilton's will not raise the glory of the Delmont family; and you had +only one brother, if I remember rightly?" + +"Have you quite forgotten the beautiful girl, who, when I last had the +pleasure of meeting you in such a scene as this, was the object of +universal attraction? You surely remember my father's favourite Eleanor, +Sir George?" + +"Eleanor--Eleanor--let me think;" and the old sailor for a moment put +himself in a musing attitude, and then starting, exclaimed, "to be sure +I do; the loveliest girl I ever cast eyes upon;--and what has become of +her? By the bye, there was some story about her, was there not? She +chose a husband for herself, and ran off, and broke her poor father's +heart. Where is she now?" + +"Let her faults be forgotten, my dear Sir George," replied Mrs. +Hamilton, with some emotion. "They were fully, painfully repented. Let +them die with her." + +"Die! Is she, too, dead? What, that graceful sylph, that exquisite +creature I see before me now, in all the pride of conscious loveliness!" +and the veteran drew his rough hand across his eyes in unfeigned +emotion, then hastily recovering himself, he said, "and this boy--this +sailor is her son. I can hardly believe it possible. Why he surely +cannot be old enough to go to sea." + +"You forget the number of years that have passed, Sir George. Edward is +now eighteen, as old, if not older, than his mother was when you last +saw her." + +"And when did poor Eleanor die?" + +"Six years ago. She had been left a widow in India, and only reached her +native land to breathe her last in my arms. You will be pleased, I +think, with her daughter, though, on second thought, perhaps, she may +not be quite lively enough for you; however, I must beg your notice for +her, as her attachment to her brother is so excessive, that all relating +to the sea is to her in the highest degree interesting." + +"And do your sister's children live with you--had their father no +relations?" + +"None; and even if he had, I should have petitioned to bring them up and +adopt them as my own. Poor children, when their mother died, their +situation was indeed melancholy. Helpless orphans of ten and scarcely +twelve, cast on a strange land, without one single friend to whom they +could look for succour or protection. My heart bled for them, and never +once have I regretted my decision." + +The old man looked at her glowing cheek in admiration, and pressing her +hand, he said warmly, prefacing his words, as he always did, with the +affirmative "ay, ay." + +"Your father's daughter must be somewhat different to others of her +rank. I must come and see you, positively I must. Wind and tide will be +strongly against me, if you do not see me in a few days anchoring off +your coast. No storms disturb your harbour, I fancy. But what has become +of your husband--your daughter? let me see all I can belonging to you. +Come, Mrs. Hamilton, crowd sail, and tow me at once to my wished for +port." + +Entering playfully into the veteran's humour, Mrs. Hamilton took his arm +and returned to the ball-room, where she was speedily joined by her +husband, who welcomed Sir George Wilmot with as much warmth and +cordiality as his wife had done, and as soon as the quadrille was +finished, a glance from her mother brought Caroline and her partner, +Lord Alphingham, to her side. + +The astonishment of Sir George, as Mrs. Hamilton introduced the blooming +girl before him as her daughter, was so irresistibly comic, that no one +present could prevent a smile; and that surprise was heightened when, in +answer to his supposition that she must be the eldest of Mrs. Hamilton's +family, Mrs. Hamilton replied that her two sons were both older, and +Caroline was, indeed, the youngest but one. + +"Then I tell you what, Mrs. Hamilton," the old veteran said, "Old Time +has been playing tricks with me, and drawing me much nearer eternity +than I at all imagined myself, or else he has stopped with me and gone +on with you." + +"Or rather, my good friend," replied Mr. Hamilton, "you can only trace +the hand of Time upon yourself, having no children in whose increasing +years you can behold him, and, therefore, he is very likely to slip the +cable before you are aware; but with us such cannot be." + +"Ay, ay, Hamilton, suppose it must be so--wish I had some children of my +own, but shall come and watch Time's progress on these instead. Ah, Miss +Hamilton, why am I such an old man? I see all the youngsters running off +with the pretty girls, and I cannot venture to ask one to dance with +me." + +"May I venture to ask you then, Sir George? The name of Admiral Wilmot +would be sufficient for any girl, I should think, to feel proud of her +partner, even were he much older and much less gallant than you, Sir +George," answered Caroline, with ready courtesy, for she had often heard +her mother speak of him, and his manner pleased her. + +"Well, that's a pretty fair challenge, Sir George; you must take up the +glove thrown from so fair a hand," observed Lord Alphingham, with a +smile that, to Caroline, and even to her mother, rendered his strikingly +handsome features yet handsomer. "Shall I relinquish my partner?" + +"No, no, Alphingham; you are better suited to her here. At home--at your +_own_ home, Miss Hamilton, one night, I shall remind you of your +promise, and we will trip it together. Now I can only thank you for your +courtesy; it has done my heart good, and reconciled me to my old age." + +"I may chance to find a rival at home, Sir George. If you see my sister, +you will not be content with me. She will use every effort to surpass me +in your good graces; for when I tell her I have seen the brave admiral +whose exploits have often caused her cheek to flush with pride--patriot +pride she calls it--she will be wild till she has seen you." + +"Will she--will she, indeed? Come and see her to-morrow; tell her so, +with an old man's love, and that I scolded your mother heartily for not +bringing her to-night. Mind orders; let me see if you are sailor enough +instinctively to obey an old captain's orders." + +"Trust me, Sir George," replied Caroline, laughingly, and a young man at +that instant addressing her by name, she bowed gracefully to the +veteran, and turned towards him who spoke. + +"Miss Hamilton, I claim your promise for this quadrille," said Lord +Henry D'Este. + +"Good bye," said Sir George. "I shall claim you for my partner when I +see you at home." + +"St. Eval dancing again. Merciful powers! we certainly shall have the +roof tumbling over our heads," exclaimed Lord Henry, as he and Caroline +found themselves _vis Ă vis_ to the earl of whom he spoke. + +"Why, is it so very extraordinary that a young man should dance?" +demanded Caroline. + +"A philosopher as he is, decidedly. You do not know him, Miss Hamilton. +He travelled all over Europe, I believe, really for the sake of +improvement, instead of enjoying all the fun he might have had; he +stored his brain with all sorts of knowledge, collecting material and +stealing legends to write a book. I went with him part of the way, but +became so tired of my companion, that I turned recreant and fled, to +enjoy a more spirited excursion of my own. I tell him, whenever I want a +lecture on all subjects, I shall come to him. I call him the Walking +Cyclopaedia, and only fancy such a personage dancing a quadrille. What +lady can have the courage to turn over the leaves of the Cyclopaedia in +a quadrille? let me see. Oh, Lady Lucy Melville, our noble hostess's +daughter. She pretends to be a bit of a blue, therefore they are not so +ill-matched as I imagined; however, she is not very bad--not a deep +blue, only just tinged with celestial azure. Sweet creature, how you +will be edified before your lesson is over. Look, Miss Hamilton, on the +other side of the Cyclopaedia. That good lady has been the last seven +years dancing with all her might and main for a husband. There is +another, striving, by an air of elegant hauteur, to prove she is +something very great, when really she is nothing at all. There's a girl +just introduced, as our noble poet says." + +"Take care, take care, Lord Henry; you are treading on dangerous +ground," exclaimed Caroline, unable to prevent laughing at the comic +manner in which her companion criticised the dancers. "You forget that I +too have only just been released, and that this is only my first glimpse +of the world." + +"You do me injustice, Miss Hamilton. I am too delightfully and +refreshingly reminded of that truth to forget it for one instant. You +may have only just made your _dĂ©but_, but you have not been schooled and +scolded, and frightened into propriety as that unfortunate girl has. If +she has smiled once too naturally, spoken one word too much, made one +step wrong, or said sir, my lord, your lordship, once too often, she +will have such a lecture to-morrow, she will never wish to go to a ball +again." + +"Poor girl!" said Caroline, in a tone of genuine pity, which caused a +smile from her partner. + +"She is not worthy of your pity, Miss Hamilton; she is hardened to it +all. What a set we are dancing with, men and women, all heartless alike; +but I want to know what magic wand has touched St. Eval. I do believe it +must be your eyes, Miss Hamilton. He talks to his partner, and looks at +you; tries to do two things at once, listen to her, and hear your voice. +You are the enchantress, depend upon it." + +A glow of triumph burned on the heart of Caroline at these words. For +though rather prejudiced against St. Eval by the arts of Annie, still, +to make an impression on one whom she had heard was invulnerable to all, +to make the calm, and some said, severely stoical, St. Eval bend beneath +her power, was a triumph she determined to achieve. That spirit of +coquetry so fatal to her aunt, the ill-fated Eleanor, was as innate in +the bosom of Caroline; no opportunity had yet offered to give it play, +still the seeds were there, and she could not resist the temptation now +presented. Even in her childhood Mrs. Hamilton had marked this fatal +propensity. Every effort had been put in force to check it, every gentle +counsel given, but arrested in its growth though it was, erased entirely +it could not be. The principles of virtue had been too carefully +instilled, for coquetry to attain the same ascendancy and indulgence +with Caroline as it had with her aunt, yet she felt she could no longer +control the inclination which the present opportunity afforded her to +use her power. + +"Do you go to the Marchioness of Malvern's fĂªte, next week?" demanded +Lord Henry. Caroline answered in the affirmative. + +"I am glad of it. The Walking Cyclopaedia may make himself as agreeable +there as he has so marvellously done to-night. You will be in fairy +land. He has brought flowers from every country, and reared them for his +mother, till they have become the admiration of all for miles around. I +told him he looked like a market gardener, collecting flowers from every +place he went to. I dragged him away several times, and told him he +would certainly be taken for a country booby, and scolded him for +demeaning his rank with such ignoble pleasures, and what wise answer do +you think he made me?" + +"A very excellent one, I have no doubt." + +"Or it would not come from such a learned personage, Miss Hamilton. +Really it was so philosophic, I was obliged to learn it as a lesson to +retain it. That he, superior as he deemed himself, and that wild flower +which he tended with so much care, were alike the work of Infinite +Wisdom, and as such, the study of the one could not demean the other. I +stared at him, and for the space of a week dubbed him the Preaching +Pilgrim; but I was soon tired of that, and resumed his former one, which +comprises all. I wonder at what letter the walking volume will be opened +at his mother's fĂªte?" + +"I should imagine B," said Caroline, smiling. + +"B--B--what does B stand for? I have forgotten how to spell--let me see. +Ah! I have it,--excellent, admirable! Miss Hamilton. Lecture on Botany +from the Walking Cyclopaedia--bravo! We had better scrape up all our +learning, to prove we are not perfect ignoramuses on the subject." + +Caroline laughingly agreed; and the quadrille being finished, Lord +Henry succeeded in persuading her to accompany him to the +refreshment-room. + +In the meanwhile, perfectly unconscious that he had been the subject of +the animated conversation of his _vis Ă vis_, St. Eval was finding more +and more to admire in Miss Hamilton. He conducted his partner to her +seat as she desired, and then strolled towards Mr. Hamilton's party, in +the hope that Caroline would soon rejoin her mother; but Annie had been +in the refreshment-room, and she did not reappear for some little time. +Mrs. Hamilton had at length been enabled to seek Lady Helen Grahame, +with whom she remained conversing, for she felt, though the delay was +unavoidable, she partly deserved the reproach with which Lady Helen +greeted her, when she entered, for permitting the whole evening to pass +without coming near her. Mrs. Hamilton perceived, with regret, that she +was more fitted for the quiet of her own boudoir, than the glare and +heat of crowded rooms. Gently she ventured to expostulate with her on +her endeavours, and Lady Helen acknowledged she felt quite unequal to +the exertion, but that the persuasions of her daughter had brought her +there. She was too indolent to add, she had seen nothing of Annie the +whole evening; nor did she wish to say anything that might increase the +disapprobation with which she sometimes felt, though Annie heeded it +not, Mrs. Hamilton regarded her child. It was admiration, almost +veneration, which Lady Helen felt for Mrs. Hamilton, and no one could +have imagined how very frequently the indolent but well-meaning woman +had regretted what she deemed was her utter inability to act with the +same firmness that characterised her friend. She was delighted at the +notice Lilla ever received from her; but blinded by the artful manners +of her elder girl, she often wished that Annie had been the favourite +instead. There was somewhat in Mrs. Hamilton's manner that night that +caused her to feel her own inferiority more than ever; but no +self-reproach mingled with the feeling. She could not be like her, and +then why should she expect or deplore what was impossible. Leaning on +Mrs. Hamilton's arm, she resolved, however, to visit the ball-room, and +they reached Mr. Hamilton at the instant Grahame joined them. + +"You here, Grahame!" exclaimed his friend, as he approached. "I thought +you had forsworn such things." + +"I make an exception to-night," he answered. "I wished to see my fair +friend Caroline where I have longed to see her." + +"You are honoured, indeed, Mrs. Hamilton," Lady Helen could not refrain +from saying. "He was not present at the _entrĂ©e_ even of his own +daughter." + +"And why was I not, Lady Helen? because I would not by my presence give +the world reason to say I also approved of the very early age at which +Miss Grahame was introduced. If I do not mistake, she is four months +younger than Caroline, and yet my daughter is no longer a novice in such +scenes as these." + +Lady Helen shrunk in terror from the stern glance of her husband, who +little knew the pain he inflicted; and Mrs. Hamilton hastily, but +cautiously drew her away to enter into conversation with the Marchioness +of Malvern, who was near them, which little manoeuvre quickly removed +the transient cloud; and though soon again compelled to seek the shelter +of the quiet little room she had quitted, the friendly kindness of Mrs. +Hamilton succeeded in making Lady Helen's evening end more agreeably +than it had begun. + +"Are you only just released, Grahame?" demanded Lord Alphingham, who +still remained near Mr. Hamilton. + +"You are less fortunate than I was, or perhaps you will think, in +parliamentary concerns, more so; but as the ball was uppermost in my +thoughts this evening, I was glad to find myself at liberty above an +hour ago." + +"Is there nothing, then, stirring in the Upper House?" + +"Nothing; I saw many of the noble members fast asleep, and those who +spoke said little to the purpose. When do you gentlemen of the Lower +House send up your bill? it will be a charity to give us something to +do." + +"We shall be charitable then on Friday next, and I much doubt if you do +not have some warm debating work. If we succeed, it will be a glorious +triumph; the Whigs are violent against us, and they are by far the +strongest party. I depend greatly on your eloquence, Alphingham." + +"It is yours to the full extent of its power, my good friend; it carries +some weight along with it, I believe, and I would gladly use it in a +good cause." + +"Did you speak to-night, Grahame?" Mr. Hamilton asked, evincing by his +animated countenance an interest in politics, which, from his retired +life, no one believed that he possessed. Grahame eagerly entered into +the detail of that night's debate, and for a little time the three +gentlemen were absorbed in politics alone. The approach of Caroline and +her mother, however, caused Grahame suddenly to break off in his speech. + +"A truce with debates, for the present," he gaily exclaimed. "Hamilton, +I never saw Caroline's extraordinary likeness to you till this moment. +What a noble-looking girl she is! Ah, Hamilton, I could pardon you if +you were much prouder of your children than you are." + +An involuntary sigh broke from his lips as he spoke, but checking it, he +hastened to Caroline, and amused her with animated discourse, till Lord +Alphingham and Eugene St. Eval at the same instant approached, the one +to claim, the other to request, Caroline as his partner in the last +quadrille before supper. The shade of deep disappointment which passed +over the young Earl's expressive countenance as Caroline eagerly +accepted the Viscount's offered arm, and owned she had been engaged to +him some time, at once confirmed to her flattered fancy the truth of +Lord Henry's words, and occasioned a feeling near akin to pleasure in +the equally observant mother. Mrs. Hamilton shrunk with horror at the +idea of introducing her child into society merely for the purpose of +decoying a husband; but she must have been void of natural feeling had +not the thought very often crossed her mind, that the time was drawing +nigh when her daughter's earthly destiny would, in all probability, be +fixed for ever; and in the midst of the tremblings of maternal love the +natural wish would mingle, that noble rank and manly virtue might be the +endowments of him who would wed her Caroline, and amongst those noble +youths with whom she had lately mingled, she had seen but one her fond +heart deemed on all points worthy of her child, and that one was the +young Earl Eugene St. Eval. That he was attracted, her penetrating eye +could scarcely doubt, but farther she would not think; and so great was +her sensitiveness on this head, that much as she admired the young man, +she was much more reserved with him than she would have been had she +suspected nothing of his newly dawning feelings. + +St. Eval did not join in the quadrille, and after lingering by Mrs. +Hamilton till she was invited to the supper-room, he aroused the +increased merriment of his tormentor, Lord Henry, by offering her his +arm, conducting her to supper, and devoting himself to her, he declared, +as if she were the youngest and prettiest girl in the room. + +"Playing the agreeable to mamma, to win the good graces of _la fille_. +Admirable diplomacy; Lord St. Eval, I wish you joy of your new talent," +maliciously remarked Lord Henry, as the Earl and his companion passed +him. A glance from those dark eyes, severe enough to have sent terror to +the soul of any less reckless than Lord Henry, was St. Eval's only +reply, and he passed on; and seldom did Mrs. Hamilton find a companion +more to her taste in a supper-room than the young Earl. The leaves of +the Walking Cyclopaedia were indeed then opened, Henry D'Este would have +said, for on very many subjects did St. Eval allow himself that evening +to converse, which, except to his mother and sisters, were ever locked +in the recesses of his own reflecting mind; but there was a kindness, +almost maternal, which Mrs. Hamilton unconsciously used to every young +person who sought her company, and that charm the young and gifted +nobleman never could resist. He spoke of her sons in a manner that could +not fail to attract a mother's heart. The six months he had spent with +them at college had been sufficient for him to form an intimate +friendship with Percy, whose endeavours to gain his esteem he had been +unable to resist; while he regretted that the reserved disposition of +Herbert, being so like his own, had prevented his knowing him so well as +his brother. He spoke too of a distant relative of Mrs. Hamilton's, the +present Lord Delmont, in whom, as the representative of her ancient +family, she was much interested. St. Eval described with eloquence the +lovely villa he occupied on the banks of Lago Guardia, near the +frontiers of the Tyrol, the health of his only sister, some few years +younger than himself, not permitting them to live in England; he had +given up all the invitations to home and pleasure held out to him by his +father-land, and retiring to Italy, devoted himself entirely to his +mother and sister. + +"He is a brother and son after your own heart, Mrs. Hamilton," concluded +St. Eval, with animation, "and that is the highest compliment I can pay +him." + +Mrs. Hamilton smiled, and as she gazed on the glowing features of the +young man, she thought he who could so well appreciate such virtues +could not be--nay, she knew he was not--deficient in them himself, and +stronger than ever became her secret wish; but she hastily banished it, +and gave her sole attention to the interesting subjects on which St. +Eval continued to speak. + +For some few hours after supper the ball continued, with even, perhaps, +more spirit than it had commenced; but St. Eval did not ask Caroline to +dance again. He fancied she preferred Alphingham's attentions, and his +sensitive mind shrunk from being again refused. Caroline knew not the +heart of him over whom she had resolved to use her power, perhaps if she +had, she would have hesitated in her determination. The least +encouragement made his heart glow with an uncontrollable sensation of +exquisite pleasure, while repulse bade it sink back with an equal if not +a greater degree of pain. St. Eval was conscious of this weakness in his +character; he was aware that he possessed a depth of feeling, which +unless steadily controlled, would tend only to his misery; and it was +for this he clothed himself in impenetrable reserve, and obtained from +the world the character of being proud and disagreeable. He dreaded the +first entrance of love within his bosom, for instinctively he felt that +his very sensitiveness would render the passion more his misery than his +joy. We are rather sceptics in the doctrine of love at first sight, but +in this case it was fervid and enduring, as if it had risen on the solid +basis of intimacy and esteem. From the first hour he had spent in the +society of Caroline Hamilton, Eugene St. Eval loved. He tried to subdue +and conquer his newly-awakened feelings, and would think he had +succeeded, but the next hour he passed in her society brought the truth +clearer than ever before his eyes; her image alone occupied his heart. +He shrunk, in his overwrought sensitiveness, from paying her those +attentions which would have marked his preference; he did not wish to +excite the remarks of the world, nor did he feel that he possessed +sufficient courage to bear the repulse, with which, if she did not +regard him, and if she were the girl he fancied her, she would cheek his +forwardness. But his heart beat high, and it was with some difficulty he +controlled his emotion, when he perceived that Caroline refused to dance +even with Lord Alphingham on several occasions, to continue conversing +with himself. How his noble spirit would have chafed and bled, could he +have known it was love of power and coquetry that dictated her manner, +and not regard, as for the time he allowed himself to fancy. + +The evening closed, the noble guests departed, and daylight had resumed +its reign over the earth by the time Mr. Hamilton's carriage stopped in +Berkeley Square. Animatedly had Caroline conversed with her parents on +the pleasures of the evening during their drive; but when she reached +her own room, when Martyn had left her, and she was alone, she was not +quite sure if a few faint whisperings of self-reproach did not in a +degree alloy the retrospection of this her first glimpse of the gay +world; but quickly--perhaps too quickly--they were banished. The +attentions of Lord Alphingham--heightened in their charm by Miss +Grahame's positive assurance to her friend that the Viscount was +attracted, there was not the very slightest doubt of it--and the +proposed pleasure of compelling the proud, reserved St. Eval to yield to +her fascinations, alone occupied her fancy. To make him her captive +would be triumph indeed. She wished, too, to show Annie she was not so +completely under control as she fancied; that she, too, could act with +the spirit of a girl of fashion; and to choose St. Eval, and +succeed--charm him to her side--force him to pay her attentions which no +other received, would, indeed, prove to her fashionable companions that +she was not so entirely governed by her mother, so very simple and +spiritless as they supposed. Her power should do that which all had +attempted in vain. Her cheek glowed, her heart burned with the bright +hope of expected triumph, and when she at length sunk to sleep, it was +to dream of St. Eval at her feet. + +Oh! were the counsels, the example, the appeal of her mother all +forgotten? Was this a mother's recompense? Alas! alas! + + + + +CHAPTER IV. + + +Numerous were the cards and invitations now left at Mr. Hamilton's door; +and the world, in its most tempting form, was indeed spread before +Caroline, although, perhaps, compared with the constant routine of +pleasure pursued by some young ladies who attend two or three assemblies +each of the six nights out of the seven, her life could scarcely be +called gay. Mr. Hamilton had drawn a line, and, difficult as it was to +keep, he adhered to his resolution, notwithstanding the entreaties of +his friends, and very often those of his daughter. A dinner-party and a +ball he would sometimes permit Caroline to attend in one day, but the +flying from house to house, to taste of every pleasure offered, he never +would allow. Nor did he or any member of his family ever attend the +Opera on Saturday night, however great might be the attractions. To +Emmeline this was a great privation, as poetry and music had ever been +her chief delights, and the loss of even one night's enjoyment was felt +severely; but she acquiesced without a murmur, appreciating the truth of +her father's remark, that it was impossible to pay attention to the +Sabbath duties when the previous evening had been thus employed. She +knew, too, how difficult it was to attend to her studies (due regard for +which her parents required amidst every recreation) on the Wednesday, +with every air she had so delighted in the previous night ringing in her +ears. Those who were eager to condemn Mrs. Hamilton whenever they +could, declared it was the greatest inconsistency to take Emmeline to +the Opera, and permit her to appear so often in company at home, and yet +in other matters he so strict; why could she not bring her out at once, +instead of only tantalizing her? but Mrs. Hamilton could never do +anything like anybody else. Her daughters were much to be pitied; and as +for her niece, she must pass a miserable life, for she was scarcely ever +seen. They had no doubt, with all Mrs. Hamilton's pretensions to +goodness, that her poor niece was utterly neglected, and kept quite in +the background; because she was so beautiful, Mrs. Hamilton was jealous +of the notice she might obtain. + +So thought, and so very often spoke, the ill-natured half of the world, +who, in reality, jealous and displeased at being excluded from Mr. +Hamilton's visiting list, did everything in their power to lessen the +estimation in which the family was held. In this, however, they could +not succeed, nor in causing pain to those whom they wished to wound. +Such petty malice demanded not a second thought from minds so +well-regulated as those of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton. Mrs. Hamilton, indeed, +turned their ill-natured remarks to advantage, for instead of neglecting +or wholly despising them, she considered them in her own heart, and in +solitary reflection pondered deeply if she in any way deserved them. She +knew that the lesson of self-knowledge is never entirely learnt; and she +knew too, that an enemy may say that in ill-will or malice which may +have some foundation, though our friends, aided by self-love, may have +hidden the truth from us. Deeply did this noble woman think on her plan +of conduct; severely she scrutinized its every motive, and she was at +peace. Before entering upon it she had implored the Divine blessing, and +she felt that, in the case of Emmeline and Ellen, her prayers for +guidance had not been unheeded. Perhaps her conduct, with regard to the +former, might have appeared inconsistent; but she felt no ill-will +towards those who condemned, knowing the disposition of her child, and +certainly those who thus spoke did not. + +Although there was little more than fourteen months difference between +the age of the sisters, Emmeline was so much a child in simplicity and +feeling, that her mother felt assured it would neither be doing her good +nor tending to her happiness to introduce her with her sister; as, from +the little difference in their ages, some mothers might have been +inclined to do. Yet she did not wish to keep her in such entire +seclusion as some, even of her friends, advised, but permitted her the +enjoyment of those innocent pleasures natural to her taste. Emmeline had +never once murmured at this arrangement; however it interfered with her +most earnest wishes, her confidence in her parents was such, that she +ever submitted to their wishes with cheerfulness. Mrs. Hamilton knew and +sympathised in her feelings at leaving Oakwood. She felt there were +indeed few pleasures in London that could compensate to a disposition +such as Emmeline's for those she had left. She had seen, with joy and +thankfulness, the conquest of self which her child had so perseveringly +achieved; and surely she was not wrong to reward her, by giving her +every gratification in her power, and endeavouring to make her as happy +as she was at Oakwood. Emmeline was no longer a child, and these +pleasures interfered not with the attention her parents still wished her +to bestow on the completion of her education. With all the innocence and +quiet of a young child she enjoyed the select parties given by her +mother with the same zest, but with the poetic feelings of dawning +youth. She absolutely revelled in the Opera, and there her mother +generally accompanied her once a week. An artist might have found a +pleasing study in the contemplation of that young, bright face, as she +sat entranced, every sense absorbed in the music which she heard, the +varying expression of her countenance reflecting every emotion acted +before her. At such moments the fond mother felt it to be impossible to +deny the young enthusiast the rich treat these musical recreations +afforded. A smile or look of sympathy was ever ready to meet the often +uncontrolled expressions of delight which Emmeline could not suppress, +for in thus listening to the compositions of our great masters, even +those much older than Emmeline can seldom entirely command their +emotions. Natural as were the manners of Caroline in public, they almost +resembled art when compared with those of her sister. Mrs. Hamilton's +lesson on self-control had not been forgotten. Emmeline generally +contrived to behave with perfect propriety, except in moments of +excitement such as these, where natural enthusiasm and almost childish +glee would have their play, and her mother could not, would not check +them. + +With regard to Ellen, the thoughtless remarks of the world were indeed +unfounded, as all who recollect the incidents detailed in former pages +will readily believe. Her health still continued so delicate as +frequently to occasion her aunt some anxiety. Through the winter, +strange to say, she had not suffered, but the spring brought on, at +intervals, those depressing feelings of languor which Mrs. Hamilton +hoped had been entirely conquered. The least exertion or excitement +caused her to suffer the following day, and therefore, except at very +small parties, she did not appear even at home. No one could suspect +from her quiet and controlled manner, and her apparently inanimate +though beautiful features, that she was as enthusiastic in mind and in +the delights of the Opera as her cousin Emmeline. By no one we do not +mean her aunt, for Mrs. Hamilton could now trace every feeling of that +young and sorrowing heart, and she saw with regret, that in her niece's +present state of health, even that pleasure must be denied her, for the +very exertion attendant on it was too much. Ellen never expressed +regret, nor did she ever breathe even to her aunt how often, how very +often, she longed once again to enjoy the fresh air of Oakwood, for +London to her possessed not even the few attractions it did to Emmeline. +She ever struggled to be cheerful, to smile when her aunt looked +anxiously at her, and strove to assure her that she was happy, perfectly +happy. Her never appearing as Emmeline did, and so very seldom even at +home, certainly gave matter for observation to those who, seeking for +it, refused to believe the true reason of her retirement. Miss Harcourt, +though she steadfastly refused to go out with her friend--for Mrs. +Hamilton never could allow that she filled any situation save that of a +friend and relation of the family--yet sometimes accompanied Emmeline to +the Opera, and always joined Mrs. Hamilton at home. Many, therefore, +were the hours Ellen spent entirely alone, but she persevered +unrepiningly in the course laid down for her by the first medical man in +London, whom her aunt had consulted. + +How she employed those lonely hours Mrs. Hamilton never would inquire. +Perfect liberty to follow her own inclinations she should enjoy at +least; but it was not without pain that Mrs. Hamilton so frequently left +her niece. She knew that the greatest privation, far more than any of +the pleasures her cousins enjoyed, was the loss of her society. The +mornings and evenings were now so much occupied, that it often happened +that the Sabbath and the evening previous were the only times Ellen +could have intercourse of any duration with her. She regretted this +deeply, for Ellen was no longer a child; she was at that age when life +is in general keenly susceptible to the pleasures of society; and +reserved as was her disposition, Mrs. Hamilton felt assured, the loss of +that unchecked domestic intercourse she had so long enjoyed at Oakwood +was pain, though never once was she heard to complain. These contrary +duties frequently grieved the heart of her aunt. Often she accompanied +Caroline when her inclination prompted her to remain at home; for she +loved Ellen as her own child, and to tend and soothe her would sometimes +have been the preferable duty; but she checked the wish, for suffering +and solitary as was Ellen, Caroline, in the dangerous labyrinth of the +world, required her care still more. + +There are trials which the world regards not--trials on which there are +many who look lightly--those productive of no interest, seldom of +sympathy, but with pain to the sufferer; it is when health fails, not +sufficiently to attract notice, but when the disordered state of the +nerves renders the mind irritable, the body weak; when from that +invisible weakness, little evils become great, the temper loses its +equanimity, the spirits their elasticity, we scarcely know wherefore, +and we reproach ourselves, and add to our uneasiness by thinking we are +becoming pettish and ill-tempered, enervated and repining; we dare not +confess such feelings, for our looks proclaim not failing health, and +who would believe us? when the very struggle for cheerfulness fills the +eye with tears, the heart with heaviness, and we feel provoked at our +peevishness, and angry that we are so different now to what we have +been; and we fancy, changed as we are, all we love can no longer regard +us as formerly. Such are among the trials of woman, unknown, frequently +unsuspected, by her nearest and dearest relations; and bitter indeed is +it when such trials befall us in early youth, when liveliness and +buoyancy are expected, and any departure therefrom is imagined to +proceed from causes very opposite to the truth. Such at present were the +trials of the orphan; but they were softened by the kindness and +sympathy of her aunt, who possessed the happy art of soothing more +effectually in a few words than others of a less kindly mould could ever +have accomplished. + +It is in the quick perception of character, in the adaptation of our +words to those whom we address, that in domestic circles renders us +beloved, and forms the fascination of society. Sympathy is the charm of +human life, and when once that is made apparent, we are not slow in +discovering or imagining others. Some people find the encouragement of +sympathy disagreeable, for they say it makes them miserable for no +purpose. What care they for the woes and joys of their acquaintances? +Often a tax, and never a pleasure. Minds of such nature know not that +there is a "joy in the midst of grief;" but Mrs. Hamilton did, and she +encouraged every kindly feeling of her nature. Previous to her marriage, +she had been perhaps too reserved and shrinking within herself, fancied +there was no one of her own rank at least who could understand her, and +therefore none with whom she could sympathise. But the greater +confidence of maturer years, the example of her husband, the emotions of +a wife and mother, had enlarged her heart, and caused her, by ready +sympathy with others, to increase her own enjoyments, and render herself +more pleasing than perhaps, if she had remained single, she ever would +have been. It was this invisible charm that caused her to be admired and +involuntarily loved, even by those who, considering her a saint at +first, shrunk in dread from her society, and it was this that rendered +the frequent trials of her niece less difficult to bear. + +"Does my Ellen remember a little conversation we had on the eve of her +last birthday?" demanded Mrs. Hamilton of her niece one evening, as she +had finished dressing, to attend her daughter to the Opera, and Martyn, +at her desire, had obeyed Caroline's impatient summons, and left to +Ellen the task of fastening her lady's jewels. + +Whenever nothing occurred to prevent it, Ellen was generally with her +aunt at dressing-time, and the little conversation that passed between +them at such periods frequently rendered Ellen's solitary evening +cheerful, when otherwise it might have been, from her state of health +and apparently endless task, even gloomy. Mrs. Hamilton had observed a +more than usual depression that evening in the manners of her niece, +and, without noticing, she endeavoured to remove it. Ellen was bending +down to clasp a bracelet as she spoke, and surprised at the question, +looked up, without giving herself time to conceal an involuntary tear, +though she endeavoured to remove any such impression, by smiling +cheerfully as she replied in the affirmative. + +"And will it cheer your solitary evenings, then, my dear Ellen?" she +continued, drawing her niece to her, and kissing her transparent brow, +"if I say that, in the self-denial, patience, and submission you are now +practising, you are doing more, towards raising your character in my +estimation, and banishing from remembrance the painful past, than you +once fancied it would ever be in your power to do. I think I know its +motive, and therefore I do not hesitate to bestow the meed of praise you +so well deserve." + +For a minute Ellen replied not, she only raised her aunt's hand to her +lips and kissed it, as if to hide her emotion before she spoke, but her +eyes were still swelling with tears as she looked up and +replied--"Indeed, my dearest aunt, I do not deserve it. You do not know +how irritable and ill-tempered I often feel." + +"Because you are not very well, my love, and yet you do not feel +sufficiently ill to complain. I sometimes fancy such a state of health +as yours is more difficult to bear than a severe though short illness, +then, you can, at least, claim soothing consolation and sympathy. Now my +poor Ellen thinks she can demand neither," she added, smiling. + +"I always receive both from you," replied Ellen, earnestly; "and not +much submission is required when that is the case, and I am told my +health forbids my sharing in Emmeline's pleasures." + +"No, love, there would not be, if you felt so ill as to have no desire +for them; but that is not the case, for I know you very often feel quite +well enough to go out with me, and I am quite sure that my Ellen +sometimes wishes she were not so completely prohibited such amusements." + +"I thought I had succeeded better in concealing those wishes," replied +Ellen, blushing deeply. + +"So you have, my dear girl, no one but myself suspects them; and you +could not expect to conceal them from me, Ellen, could you, when +Emmeline says it is utterly impossible to hide her most secret thought +from my mystic wand? Do not attempt more, my love; persevere in your +present conduct, and I shall be quite satisfied. Have you an interesting +book for to-night, or is there any other employment you prefer?" + +"You have banished all thoughts of gloom, my dear aunt, and perhaps, +instead of reading, I shall work and think on what you have said," +exclaimed Ellen, her cheek becoming more crimsoned than it was before, +and exciting for the moment the attention of her aunt. She, however, +soon permitted it to pass from her thoughts, for she knew the least +emotion generally had that effect. Little did she imagine how those +solitary hours were employed. Little did she think the cause of that +deep blush, or guess the extent of comfort her words had bestowed on her +niece, how they cheered the painful task the orphan believed it her duty +to perform. Spite of many obstacles of failing health, she +perseveringly continued, although as yet she approached not the end of +her desires. No gleam of light yet appeared to say her toil was nearly +over, her wish obtained. + +The limits of our tale, as well as the many histories of individuals +these memoirs of the Hamilton family must embrace, will not permit us to +linger on the scenes of gaiety in which Caroline now mingled, and which +afforded her, perhaps, too many opportunities for the prosecution of her +schemes; Miss Grahame's task was no longer difficult. Her confidence +once given to another, she could not recall to bestow it upon her +mother, from whom, the more she mingled in society, the more she became +estranged; and Annie became at once her confidant and adviser. Eager to +prove she was not the simple-minded being she was believed, Caroline +confided her designs, with regard to St. Eval, to Miss Grahame, who, as +may be supposed, heightened and encouraged them. Had any one pointed out +to Caroline she was acting with duplicity, departing from the line of +truth to which, even in her childhood, in the midst of many other +faults, she had beautifully and strictly adhered, she might have shrunk +back in horror; but where was the harm of a little innocent flirtation? +Annie would repeatedly urge, if she fancied a doubt of the propriety of +such conduct was rising in her friend's mind, and she was ready with +examples of girls of high birth and exemplary virtues who practised it +with impunity: it gave a finish to the character of a woman, proved she +would sometimes act for herself, not always be in leading-strings; it +gave a taste of power, gratified her ambition; in short, flirtation was +the very acme of enjoyment, and gave a decided _ton_ before and after +marriage. + +St. Eval was not sanguine. But it was in vain he tried to resist the +fascinations of the girl he loved, he could not for an instant doubt but +that she encouraged him; he even felt grateful, and loved her more for +those little arts and kindnesses with which she ever endeavoured to draw +him from his reserve, and chain him to her side. Could that noble spirit +imagine she only acted thus to afford herself amusement for the time, +and prove her power to her companions? Could she, the child of Mr. and +Mrs. Hamilton, act otherwise than honourably? We may pardon Lord St. +Eval for believing it impossible, but bitterly was he deceived. Even her +mother, her penetrating, confiding mother, was deceived, and no marvel +then that such should be the case with a comparative stranger. + +Had Caroline's manner been more generally coquettish, Mrs. Hamilton's +eyes might have been opened; but her behaviour in general was such as +rather to diminish than increase those fears which, before her child had +joined the world, had very frequently occupied her anxious heart. To +strangers even, her encouragement of St. Eval might not have been +observable, though it was clearly so to the watchful eyes of her +parents, whose confidence in their daughter's integrity was such as +entirely to exonerate her in their minds from any intention of coquetry. +In this instance, perhaps, their regard for the young Earl himself, and +their mutual but secret wishes might have heightened their belief, that +not only was St. Eval attracted but that Caroline encouraged him, and +feeling this they regretted that Lord Alphingham should continue his +attentions, which Caroline never appeared to receive with any particular +pleasure. + +Anxious as had been Mrs. Hamilton's feelings with regard to the +friendship subsisting between her daughter and Annie Grahame, she little +imagined how painfully the influence of the latter had already tarnished +the character of the former. Few are aware of the danger arising from +those very intimate connections which young women are so fond of +forming. Every mother should study, almost as carefully as those of her +own, the character of her children's intimate friends. Mrs. Hamilton had +done so, and as we know, never approved of Caroline's intimacy with +Annie, but yet she could not check their intercourse while such intimate +friendship existed between her husband and Montrose Grahame. She knew, +too, that the latter felt pleasure in beholding Caroline the chosen +friend of his daughter; and though she could never hope as Grahame did, +that the influence of her child would improve the character of his, she +had yet sufficient confidence in Caroline at one time to believe that +she would still consider her mother her dearest and truest friend, and +thus counteract the effects of Annie's ill-directed eloquence. In this +hope she had already found herself disappointed; but still, though +Caroline refused her sympathy, and bestowed it, as so many other girls +did, on a companion of her own age, she relied perhaps too fondly on +those principles she had so carefully instilled in early life, and +believed that no stain would sully the career of her much-loved child. +If Mrs. Hamilton's affection in this instance completely blinded her, if +she acted too weakly in not at once breaking this closely woven chain of +intimacy, her feelings, when she knew all, were more than sufficient +chastisement. Could the noble, the honourable, the truth-loving mother +for one instant imagine that Caroline, the child whose early years had +caused her so much pain, had called forth so many tearful prayers--the +child whose dawning youth had been so fair, that her heart had nearly +lost its tremblings--that her Caroline should encourage one young man +merely to indulge in love of power, and what was even worse, to thus +conceal her regard for another? Yet it was even so. Caroline really +believed that not only was she an object of passionate love to the +Viscount, but that she returned the sentiment with equal if not +heightened warmth, and, as the undeniable token of true love, she never +mentioned his name except to her confidant. In the first of these +conjectures she was undoubtedly right; as sincerely as a man of his +character could, Lord Alphingham did love Miss Hamilton, and the +fascination of his manner, his insinuating eloquence, and ever ready +flattery, all combined, might well cause this novice in such matters to +believe her heart was really touched; but that it truly was so not only +may we be allowed to doubt, but it appeared that Annie did so also, by +her laborious efforts to fan the newly ignited spark into a name, and +never once permit Caroline to look into herself; and she took so many +opportunities of speaking of those silly, weak-spirited girls, that went +with a tale of love directly to their mothers, and thus very frequently +blighted their hopes and condemned them to broken hearts, by their +duennas' caprices, that Caroline shrunk from the faintest wish to +confide all to her mother, with a sensation amounting almost to fear and +horror. Eminently handsome and accomplished as Lord Alphingham was, +still there was somewhat in his features, or rather their expression, +that did not please, and scarcely satisfied Mrs. Hamilton's penetration. +Intimate as he was with Grahame, friendly as he had become with her +husband, she could not overcome the feeling of repugance with which she +more than once found herself unconsciously regarding him; and she felt +pleased that Mr. Hamilton steadily adhered to his resolution in not +inviting him to his house. To have described what she disliked in him +would have been impossible, it was indefinable; but there was a casual +glance of that dark eye, a curl of that handsome mouth, a momentary +knitting of the brow, that whispered of a mind not inwardly at peace; +that restless passions had found their dwelling-place around his heart. +Mrs. Hamilton only saw him in society: it was uncharitable perhaps to +judge him thus; but the feelings of a mother had rendered her thus +acute, had endowed her with a penetration unusually perceptive, and she +rejoiced that Caroline gave him only the meed of politeness, and that no +sign of encouragement was displayed in her manner towards him. + +That mother's fears were not unfounded. Lord Alphingham loved Caroline, +but the love of a libertine is not true affection, and such a character +for the last fourteen years of his life he had been; nine years of that +time he had lived on the Continent, gay, and courted, in whatever +country he resided, winning many a youthful heart to bid it break, or +lure it on to ruin. It was only the last year he had returned to +England, and as he had generally assumed different names in the various +parts of the Continent he had visited, the adventures of his life were +unknown in the land of his birth, save that they were sometimes +whispered by a few in similar coteries, and then more as conjecture than +reality. So long a time had elapsed, that the wild errors of his youth, +which had been perhaps the original cause of his leaving England, were +entirely forgotten, as if such things had never been, and the Viscount +now found himself quite as much, if not more, an object of universal +attraction in his native land than he had been on the Continent. He was +now about thirty, and perfect indeed in his vocation. The freshness, +_naĂ¯vetĂ©_, and perfect innocence of Caroline had captivated his fancy +perhaps even more than it had ever been before, and her perfect +ignorance of the ways of the fashionable world encouraged him to hope +his conquest of her heart would be very easy. He had found an able +confidant and advocate in Miss Grahame, who had contrived to place +herself with her father's friend on the footing of most friendly +intimacy, and partly by her advice and the suggestions of his own heart +he determined to win the regard of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, before he +openly paid attentions to their daughter. With the former he appeared +very likely to succeed, for the talent he displayed in the House, his +apparently earnest zeal for the welfare of his country, her church and +state, his masterly eloquence, and the interest he felt for Grahame, +were all qualities attractive in the eyes of Mr. Hamilton; and though he +did not yet invite him to his house, he never met him without evincing +pleasure. With Mrs. Hamilton, Alphingham did not find himself so much at +ease, nor fancy he was so secure; courteous she was indeed, but in her +intercourse with him she had unconsciously recalled much of what Grahame +termed the forbidding reserve of years past. In vain he attempted with +her to pass the barriers of universal politeness, and become intimate; +his every advance was repelled coldly, yet not so devoid of courtesy as +to make him suspect she had penetrated his secret character. Still he +persevered in unwavering and marked politeness, although Annie's +representations of Mrs. Hamilton's character had already caused him to +determine in his own mind to make Caroline his wife, with or without her +mother's approval; and he amused himself with believing that, as her +mother was so strict and stern as to keep her children, particularly +Caroline, in such subjection, it would be doing the poor girl a charity +to release her from such thraldom, and introduce her, as his wife, into +scenes far more congenial to her taste, where she would be free from +such keen _surveillance_. In these thoughts he was ably seconded by +Annie, who was constantly pitying Caroline's enslaved situation, and +condemning Mrs. Hamilton's strict severity, declaring it was all +affectation; she was not a degree better than any one else, who did not +make half the fuss about it. Lord Alphingham's resolution was taken, +that before the present season was over, Caroline should be engaged to +him, _nolens volens_ on the part of her parents, and he acted +accordingly. + +As opposite as were the characters, so was the conduct of Caroline's two +noble suitors. St. Eval, spite of the encouragement he received, yet +shrunk from paying any marked attention either to Caroline or her +parents. It was by degrees he became intimate in their family, but +there, perhaps, the only person with whom he felt entirely at ease was +Emmeline, who, rejoicing at Caroline's change of manner, began to hope +her feelings were changing too, and indulged in hopes that one day Lord +St. Eval might really be her brother. Emmeline knew her sister's opinion +of coquetry was very different to hers; but this simple-minded girl +could never have conceived that scheme of duplicity, which, by the aid +and counsel of Annie, Caroline now practised. She scarcely ever saw +Alphingham, and never hearing her sister name him, and being perfectly +unconscious of his attentions when they met, she could not, even in her +unusually acute imagination, believe him St. Eval's rival. More and more +enamoured the young Earl became each time he felt himself an especial +object of Caroline's notice; his heart throbbed and his hopes grew +stronger, still he breathed not one word of love, he dared not. +Diffident of his own attractive qualities, he feared to speak, till he +thought he could be assured of her affections. In the intoxication of +love, he felt her refusal would have more effect upon him than he could +bear. He shrunk from the remarks of the world, and waited yet a little +longer, ere with a trembling heart he should ask that all-important +question. So matters stood in Mr. Hamilton's family during the greater +part of the London season; but as it is not our task to enter into +Caroline's gaieties, we here may be permitted to mention Mrs. Greville's +departure with her delicate and suffering child from the land of their +birth. + +Mr. Greville had made no opposition to their intended plan. Seriously +Mr. Maitland had told him that the life of his child depended on her +residence for some time abroad, in a genial climate and extreme quiet; +but in vain did Mrs. Greville endeavour to believe that affection for +his daughter and herself occasioned this unwonted acquiescence; it was +too clearly to be perceived that he was pleased at their separation from +himself, for it gave him more liberty. She wrote to her son, imploring +him in the most earnest and affectionate manner to return home for the +Easter vacation, that she might see him for a few days before she left +England--perhaps never to return. Ruined from earliest boyhood by weak +indulgence, Alfred Greville felt sometimes a throb of natural feeling +for his mother, though her counsels were of no avail. Touched by the +mournful solemnity and deep affection breathing in every line, he +complied with her request, and spent four or five days peacefully at +home. He appeared shocked at the alteration he found in his sister, and +was kinder than he had previously been in his manner towards her. He had +lately become heir to a fortune and estate, left him by a very old and +distant relative of his father, and it was from this he had determined, +he told his father, to go to Cambridge and cut a dash there with the +best of them. He was now eighteen, and believed himself no +inconsiderable personage, in which belief he was warmly encouraged by +his mistaken father. It was strange that, with such an income, he +permitted the favourite residence of his mother and sister to be +sold--but so it was. The generous feelings of his early childhood had +been completely blunted, and to himself alone he intended to appropriate +that fortune, when a portion would yet have removed many of Mrs. +Greville's anxious fears for the future. Alfred intended, when he was of +age, to be one of the first men of fashion; but he did not consider, +that if he "cut a dash" at college, with the _Ă©clat_ he wished, that +before three years had passed, he would not be much richer than he had +been when the fortune was first left him. + +"Mother, you will drive me from you," he one day exclaimed, in passion, +as she endeavoured to detain him. "If you wish ever to see me, let me +take my own way. Advice I will not brook, and reproach I will not bear; +if you love me, be silent, for I will not be governed." + +"Alfred, I will speak!" replied his almost agonized parent, urged on by +an irresistible impulse. "Child of my love, my prayers! Alfred, I will +not see you go wrong, without one effort, one struggle to guide you in +the right path. Alfred, I leave England--my heart is bursting; for +Mary's sake alone I live, and if she be taken from me, Alfred, we shall +never meet again. My son, oh, if you ever loved me, listen to me now, +they may be the last words you will ever hear from your mother's lips. I +implore, I beseech you to turn from your evil courses, Alfred!" and she +suddenly sunk at his feet, the mother before the son. So devoted, so +fervid was the love with which she regarded him, that had she been told, +that to lure him to virtue her own life must be the forfeit, willingly +at that moment would she have died. She continued with an eloquence of +such beseeching tenderness, it would have seemed none could have heard +it unmoved. "Alfred, your mother kneels to you, your own mother. Oh, +hear her; do not condemn her to wretchedness. Let me not suffer more. +You have sought temptation; oh, fly from it; seek the companionship of +those who will lead you to honour, not to vice. Break from those +connections you have weaved around you. Turn again to the God you have +deserted. Oh, do not live as you have done; think on the responsibility +each year increases. My child, my beloved, in mercy refuse not your +mother's prayer! reject not my advice, Alfred! Alfred!" and she clung to +him, while her voice became hoarse with intense anguish. "Oh, promise me +to turn from your present life. Promise me to think on my words, to +seek the footstool of mercy, and return again to Him who has not +forsaken you. Promise me to live a better life; say you will be your +mother's comfort, not her misery--her blessing, not her curse. My child, +my child, be merciful!" Longer, more imploring still would she have +pleaded, but voice failed, and it was only on those chiselled features +the agony of the soul could have been discovered. Alfred gazed on her +thus kneeling at his feet--his mother, she, who in his infancy had knelt +beside him, to guide on high his childish prayers. The heart of the +misguided boy was softened, tears filled his eyes. He would have spoken; +he would have pledged himself to do all that she had asked, when +suddenly the ridicule of his companions flashed before his fancy. Could +he bear that? No; he could see his mother at his feet, but he could not +meet the ridicule of the world. He raised her hastily, but in perfect +silence; pressed her to his heart, kissed her cheek repeatedly, then +placed her on a couch, and darted from her presence. He had said no +word, he had given no sign; and for several hours that mother could not +overcome internal wretchedness so far even as to join her Mary. He +returned to Cambridge. They parted in affection; seldom had the reckless +boy evinced so much emotion as he did when he bade farewell to his +mother and sister. He folded Mary to his bosom, and implored her, in a +voice almost inaudible, to take care of her own health for the sake of +their mother; but when she entreated him to come and see them in their +new abode as soon as he could, he answered not. Yet that emotion had +left a balm on the torn heart of his mother. She fancied her son, +wayward as he was, yet loved her; and though she dared not look forward +to his reformation, still, to feel he loved her--oh, if fresh zeal were +required in her prayers, that knowledge gave it. + +The first week in May they left Greville Manor. Still weak and +suffering, the struggle to conceal and subdue all she felt at leaving, +as she thought for ever, the house of her infancy, of her girlhood, her +youth, was almost too much for poor Mary; and her mother more than once +believed she would not reach in life the land they were about to seek. +The sea breezes, for they travelled whenever they could along the shore, +in a degree nerved her; and by the time they reached Dover, ten days +after they had left the Manor, she had rallied sufficiently to ease the +sorrowing heart of her mother of a portion of its burden. + +They arrived at Dover late in the evening, and early the following day, +as Mary sat by the large window of the hotel, watching with some +appearance of interest the bustling scene before her, a travelling +carriage passed rapidly by and stopped at the entrance. She knew the +livery, and her heart throbbed almost to suffocation, as it whispered +that Mr. Hamilton would not come alone. + +"Mother, Mr. Hamilton has arrived," she succeeded at length in saying. +"And Emmeline--is it, can it be?" But she had no more time to wonder, +for ere she had recovered the agitation the sight of one other of Mr. +Hamilton's family had occasioned, they were in the room, and Emmeline +springing forward, had flung herself on Mary's neck; and utterly unable +to control her feelings at the change she beheld in her friend, wept +passionately on her shoulder. Powerfully agitated, Mary felt her +strength was failing, and had it not been for Mr. Hamilton's support, +she would have fallen to the ground. He supported her with a father's +tenderness to the couch, and reproachfully demanded of Emmeline if she +had entirely forgotten her promise of composure. + +"Do not reprove her, my dear friend," said Mrs. Greville, as she drew +the weeping girl affectionately to her. "My poor Mary is so quickly +agitated now, that the pleasure of seeing three instead of one of our +dear-valued friends has been sufficient of itself to produce this +agitation. And you, too, Herbert," she continued, extending her hand to +the young man, who hastily raised it to his lips, as if to conceal an +emotion which had paled his cheek, almost as a kindred feeling had done +with Mary's. "Have you deserted your favourite pursuits, and left Oxford +at such a busy time, merely to see us before we leave? This is kind, +indeed." + +"I left Percy to work for me," answered Herbert, endeavouring to hide +emotion under the veil of gaiety. "As to permit you to leave England +without once more seeing you, and having one more smile from Mary, I +would not, even had the whole honour of my college been at stake. You +must not imagine me so entirely devoted to my hooks, dear Mrs. Greville, +as to believe I possess neither time nor inclination for the gentler +feelings of human nature." + +"I know you too well, and have known you too long, to imagine that," +replied Mrs. Greville, earnestly. "And is Mary so completely to engross +your attention, Emmeline," she added, turning towards the couch where +the friends sat, "that I am not to hear a word of your dear mother, +Caroline, or Ellen? Indeed, I cannot allow that." + +The remark quickly produced a general conversation, and Herbert for the +first time addressed Mary. A strange, unconquerable emotion had chained +his tongue as he beheld her; but now, with eager yet respectful +tenderness, he inquired after her health, and how she had borne their +long journey, and other questions, trifling in themselves, but uttered +in a tone that thrilled the young heart of her he addressed. + +Herbert knew not how intimately the image of Mary Greville had mingled +with his most secret thoughts, even in his moments of grave study and +earnest application, until he heard she was about to leave England. +Sorrow, disappointment, scarcely defined but bitterly painful, then +occupied his mind, and the knowledge burst with dazzling clearness on +his heart that he loved her; so deeply, so devotedly, that even were +every other wish fulfilled, life, without her, would be a blank. He had +deemed himself so lifted above all earthly feelings, that even were he +to be deprived as Mr. Morton of every natural relation, he could in time +reconcile himself to the will of his Maker, and in the discharge of +ministerial duties be happy. He had fancied his heart was full of the +love of God alone, blessed in that, however changed his earthly lot. +Suddenly he was awakened from his illusion: now in the hour of +separation he knew an earthly idol; he discovered that he was not so +completely the servant of his Maker as he had hoped, and sometimes +believed. But in the doubts and fears which shadowed his exalted mind, +he sought the footstool of his God. His cry for assistance was not +unheeded. Peace and comfort rested on his heart. A cloud was lifted +from his eyes, and for the knowledge of his virtuous love he blessed his +God; feeling thus supported he could guide and control himself according +to the dictates of piety. He knew well the character of Mary; he felt +assured that, if in after years he were permitted to make her his own, +she would indeed become his helpmate in all things, more particularly in +those which related to his God and to his holy duties among men. He +thought on the sympathy that existed between them--he remembered the +lighting up of that soft, dark eye, the flushing cheek, the smile of +pleasure that ever welcomed him, and fondly his heart whispered that he +need not doubt her love. Three years, or nearly four must elapse ere he +could feel at liberty to marry; not till he beheld himself a minister of +God. Yet interminable as to his imagination the intervening years +appeared, still there was no trembling in his trusting heart. If his +Father on high ordained them for each other, it mattered not how long +the time that must elapse, and if for some wise purpose his wishes were +delayed, he recognised the hand of God, and saw "that it was good." + +Yet Herbert could not resist the impulse to behold Mary once more ere +she quitted England to explain to her his feelings; to understand each +other. He knew the day his father intended going to Dover, and the +evening previous, much to the astonishment of his family, made his +appearance amongst them. All expressed pleasure at his intention but +one, and that one understood not why; but when she heard the cause of +his unexpected visit, a sudden and indefinable pang shot through her +young heart, dimming at once the joy with which the sight of him had +filled it. She knew not, guessed not why, when she laid her head on her +pillow that night, she wept so bitterly. The source of those secret and +silent tears she could not trace, she only knew their cause was one of +sorrow, and yet she loved Mary. + +The pleading earnestness of Emmeline had, after some little difficulty, +obtained the consent of her mother to her accompanying her father and +brother, on condition, however, of her not agitating Mary by any +unconstrained display of sorrow. It was only at their first meeting this +condition had been forgotten. Mary looked so pale, so thin, so different +even to when they parted, that the warm heart of Emmeline could not be +restrained, for she knew, however resignation might be, nay, was felt, +it was a bitter pang to that gentle girl to leave her native land, and +the friends she so much loved; but recalling her promise, with a strong +effort she checked her own sorrow, and endeavoured with playful fondness +to raise the spirits of her friend. + +The day passed cheerfully, the young people took a drive for some few +miles in the vicinity of Dover, while Mr. Hamilton, acting the part of a +brother to the favourite _protĂ©geĂ©_ of his much-loved mother, listened +to her plans, counselled and improved them, and, indeed, on many points +proved himself such a true friend, that when Mrs. Greville retired to +rest that night, she felt more at ease in mind than for many months she +had been. + +The following day was employed in seeing the antiquities of Dover, its +ancient castle among the first, and with Mr. Hamilton as a cicerone, it +was a day of pleasure to all, though, perhaps, a degree of melancholy +might have pervaded the party in the evening, for the recollection would +come, that by noon on the morrow, Mrs. Greville and Mary would bid them +farewell. In vain during that day had Herbert sought for an opportunity +to speak with Mary on the subject nearest his heart, though they had +been so happy together; when for a few minutes they found themselves +alone, he had fancied there was more than usual reserve in Mary's +manner, which checked the words upon his lip. Some hours he lay awake +that night. Should he write his hopes and wishes? No: he would hear the +answer from her own lips, and the next morning an opportunity appeared +to present itself. + +The vessel did not leave Dover till an hour before noon, and breakfast +having been despatched by half-past nine, Mrs. Greville persuaded her +daughter to take a gentle walk in the intervening time. Herbert +instantly offered to escort her. Emmeline remained to assist Mrs. +Greville in some travelling arrangements, and Mr. Hamilton employed +himself in some of those numberless little offices which active men take +upon themselves in the business of a departure. Mary shrunk with such +evident reluctance from this arrangement, that for the first time +Herbert doubted. + +"You were not wont to shrink thus from accepting me as your companion," +he said, fixing his large expressive eyes mournfully upon her, and +speaking in a tone of such melancholy sweetness, that Mary hastily +struggled to conceal the tear that started to her eye. "Are our happy +days of childhood indeed thus forgotten?" he continued, gently. "Go with +me, dear Mary; let us in fancy transport ourselves at least for one +hour back to those happy years of early life which will not come again." + +The thoughts, the hopes, the joys of her childhood flashed with sudden +power through the heart of Mary as he spoke, and she resisted them not. + +"Forgive me, Herbert," she said, hastily rising to prepare; "I have +become a strange and wayward being the last few months; you must bear +with me, for the sake of former days." + +Playfully he granted the desired forgiveness, and they departed on their +walk. For some little time they walked in silence. Before they were +aware of it, a gentle ascent conducted them to a spot, not only lovely +in its own richness, but in the extensive view that stretched beneath +them. The wide ocean lay slumbering at their feet; the brilliant rays of +the sun, which it reflected as a mirror, appeared to lull it to rest, +the very waves broke softly on the shore. To the left extended the +snow-white cliffs, throwing in shadow part of the ocean, and bringing +forward their own illumined walls in bold relief against the dark blue +sea. Ships of every size, from the floating castle in the offing to the +tiny pleasure boat, whose white sails shining in the sun caused her to +be distinguished at some distance, skimming along the ocean as a bird of +snowy plumage across the heavens, the merchant vessels, the packets +entering and departing, even the blackened colliers, added interest to +the scene; for at the distance Herbert and Mary stood, no confusion was +heard to disturb the moving picture. On their right the beautiful +country peculiar to Kent spread out before them in graceful undulations +of hill and valley, hop-ground and meadow, wherein the sweet fragrance +of the newly-mown grass was wafted at intervals to the spot where they +stood. Wild flowers of various kinds were around them; the hawthorn +appearing like a tree of snow in the centre of a dark green hedge; the +modest primrose and the hidden violet yet lingered, as if loth to +depart, though their brethren of the summer had already put forth their +budding blossoms. A newly-severed trunk of an aged tree invited them to +sit and rest, and the most tasteful art could not have placed a rustic +seat in a more lovely scene. + +Long and painfully did Mary gaze around her, as if she would engrave +within her heart every scene of the land she was so soon to leave. + +"Herbert," she said, at length, "I never wished to gaze on futurity +before, but now, oh, I would give much to know if indeed I shall ever +gaze on these scenes again. Could I but think I might return to them, +the pang of leaving would lose one half its bitterness. I know this is a +weak and perhaps sinful feeling; but in vain I have lately striven to +bow resignedly to my Maker's will, even should His call meet me, as I +sometimes fear it will, in a foreign land, apart from all, save one, +whom I love on earth." + +"Do not, do not think so, dearest Mary. True, indeed, there is no +parting without its fears, even for a week, a day, an hour. Death ever +hovers near us, to descend when least expected. But oh, for my sake, +Mary, dear Mary, talk not of dying in a foreign land. God's will is +best, His decree is love; I know, I feel it, and on this subject from +our infancy we have felt alike; to you alone have I felt that I dared +breathe the holy aspirations sometimes my own. I am not wont to be +sanguine, but somewhat whispers within me you will return--these scenes +behold again." + +Mary gazed on her young companion, he had spoken with unwonted +animation, and his mild eye rested with trusting fondness upon her; she +dared not meet it; her pale cheek suddenly became crimson, but with an +effort she replied-- + +"Buoy me not up with vain hopes, Herbert; it is better, perhaps, that I +should never look to my return, for hope might descend to vain wishes, +and wishes to repinings, which must not be. I shall look on other scenes +of loveliness, and though in them perhaps no fond association of earth +may be mingled, yet there is one of which no change of country can +deprive me, one association that from scenes as these can never never +fly. The friends of my youth will be no longer near me, strangers alone +will surround me; but even as the hand of my Heavenly Father is marked +in every scene, however far apart, so is that hand, that love extended +to me wherever I may dwell. Oh, that my heart may indeed be filled with +the love of Him." + +There was a brief silence. The countenance of Herbert had been for a +moment troubled, but after a few seconds resumed its serenity, +heightened by the fervid feelings of his heart. + +"Mary," he said, taking her passive hand in his, "if I am too bold in +speaking all I wish, forgive me. You know not how I have longed for one +moment of unchecked confidence before you left England, it is now before +me, and, oh, listen to me, dearest Mary, with that kindness you have +ever shown. I need not remind you of our days of childhood and early +youth; I need not recall the mutual sympathy which, in every feeling, +hope, joy, or sorrow, has been our own. We have grown together, played +together in infancy; read, thought, and often in secret prayed together +in youth. To you I have ever imparted my heartfelt wishes, earnest +prayers for my future life, to become a worthy servant of my God, and +lead others in his path, and yet, frail mortal as I am, I feel, even if +these wishes are fulfilled, there will yet, dearest Mary, remain a void +within my heart. May I, may I, indeed, behold in the playmate of my +infancy a friend in manhood, the partner of my life--my own Mary as my +assistant in labours of love? I am agitating you, dearest girl, forgive +me; only give me some little hope. Years must elapse ere that blessed +moment can arrive, perhaps I have been wrong to urge it now, but I could +not part from you without one word to explain my feelings, to implore +your ever-granted sympathy." + +The hand of Mary trembled in his grasp. She had turned from his pleading +glance, but when he ceased, she raised her head and struggled to speak. +A smile, beautiful, holy in its beauty, appeared struggling with tears, +and a faint flush had risen to her cheek, but voice she had none, and +for one moment she concealed her face on his shoulder. She withdrew not +her hand from his, and Herbert felt--oh, how gratefully--that his love +was returned; he had not hoped in vain. For some minutes they could not +speak, every feeling was in common; together they had grown, together +loved, and now that the magic word had been spoken, what need was there +for reserve? none; and reserve was banished. No darkening clouds were +then perceived; at that moment Mary thought not of her father, and if +she did, could she believe that his consent to an union with a son of +Mr. Hamilton would be difficult to obtain. Marry they could not yet, and +perhaps the unalloyed bliss of that hour might have originated in the +fact that they thought only of the present--the blessed knowledge that +they loved each other, were mutually beloved. + +The happiness glowing on Mary's expressive countenance as she entered +could not fail to attract the watchful eye of her mother, and almost +unconsciously, and certainly indefinably, her own bosom reflected the +pleasure of her child, and the pang of quitting England was partially +eased of its bitterness. Yet still it was a sorrowful moment when the +time of separation actually came. Their friends had gone on board with +them, and remained till the signal for departure was given. Mary had +preferred the cabin to the confusion on deck, and there her friends left +her. In the sorrow of that moment Emmeline's promise of composure was +again forgotten; she clung weeping to Mary's neck, till her father, with +gentle persuasion, drew her away, and almost carried her on deck. +Herbert yet lingered; they were alone in the cabin, the confusion +attendant on a departure preventing all fear of intruders. He clasped +Mary to his heart, in one long passionate embrace, then hastily placing +the trembling girl in the arms of her mother, he murmured almost +inaudibly-- + +"Mrs. Greville, dearest Mrs. Greville, guard, oh, guard her for me, she +will be mine; she will return to bless me, when I may claim and can +cherish her as my wife. Talk to her of me; let not the name of Herbert +be prohibited between you. I must not stay, yet one word more, Mrs. +Greville--say, oh, say you will not refuse me as your son, if three +years hence Mary will still be mine. Say your blessing will hallow our +union; and oh, I feel it will then indeed be blessed!" + +Overpowered with sudden surprise and unexpected joy, Mrs. Greville gazed +for a moment speechlessly on the noble youth before her, and vainly the +mother struggled to speak at this confirmation of her long-cherished +hopes and wishes. + +"Mother," murmured Mary, alarmed at her silence, and burying her face in +her bosom, "mother, will you not speak, will you not bid us hope?" + +"God in Heaven bless you, my children!" she at length exclaimed, +bursting into tears of heartfelt gratitude and joy. "It was joy, joy," +she repeated, struggling for composure; "I expected not this blessing. +Yes, Herbert, we will speak of you, think of you, doubt us not, my son, +my dear son. A mother's protecting care and soothing love will guard +your Mary. She is not only her mother's treasure now. Go, my beloved +Herbert, you are summoned; farewell, and God bless you!" + +Herbert did not linger with his father and sister; a few minutes private +interview with the former caused his most sanguine hopes to become yet +stronger, then travelling post to London, where he only remained a few +hours, returned with all haste to his college. In his rapid journey, +however, he had changed his mind with regard to keeping what had passed +between himself and Mary a secret from his mother, whom he yet loved +with perhaps even more confiding fondness than in his boyhood. He saw +her alone; imparted to her briefly but earnestly all that had passed, +implored her to promise consent, and preserve his confidence even from +his brothers and sisters; as so long a time must elapse ere they could +indeed be united, that he dreaded their engagement being known. + +"Even the good wishes of the dear members of home," he said, "would +sound, I fear, but harshly on my ear. I cannot define why I do not wish +it known even to those I love; yet, dearest mother, indulge me. The +events of one day are hidden from us; how dark then must be those of +three years. No plighted promise has passed between us; it is but the +confidence of mutual love; and that--oh, mother, I could not bear it +torn from the recesses of my own breast to be a subject of conversation +even to those dearest to me." + +His mother looked on the glowing countenance of her son; on him, who +from, his birth had never by his conduct given her one single moment of +care, and had she even disapproved of his secrecy, all he asked would +have been granted him; but she approved of his resolution, and emotion +glistened in her eye, as she said-- + +"My Herbert, if I had been privileged to select one among my young +friends to be your wife, my choice would have fallen, without one +moment's hesitation, on Mary Greville. She, amid them all, I deem most +worthy to be the partner of my son. May Heaven in mercy spare you to +each other!" + +Herbert returned to college, and resumed his studies with even greater +earnestness than, before. His unrestrained confidence had been as balm +to his mother's heart, and soothed the bitter pain it was to behold, to +feel assured, for it was no longer fancy, that the confidence of +Caroline was indeed utterly denied her and bestowed upon another. Yet +still Mrs. Hamilton fancied Caroline loved St. Eval; her eyes had not +yet been opened to the enormity of her daughter's conduct. Nor were they +till, after a long struggle of fervid love with the tremblings natural +to a fond but reserved and lowly heart, St. Eval summoned courage to +offer hand, heart, and fortune to the girl he loved (he might well be +pardoned for the belief that she loved him), and was rejected, coldly, +decidedly. + +The young Earl had received the glad sanction of Mr. Hamilton to make +his proposals to his daughter. There had never been, nor was there now, +anything to damp his hopes. He was not, could not be deceived in the +belief that Caroline accepted, nay, demanded, encouraged his attention. +Invariably kind, almost fascinating in her manner, she had ever singled +him out from the midst of many much gayer and more attractive young men. +She had given him somewhat more to love each time they parted; and what +could this mean, but that she cared for him more than for others? Again +and again St. Eval pondered on the encouragement he could not doubt but +that he received; again and again demanded of himself if he were not +playing with her feelings thus to defer his proposals. Surely she loved +him. The sanction of her parents had heightened his hopes, and love and +confidence in the truth, the purity of his beloved one obtained so much +ascendancy over his heart, that when the important words were said, he +had almost ceased to fear. How bitter, how agonizing then must have been +his disappointment when he was refused--when sudden haughtiness beamed +on Caroline's noble brow, and coldness spread over every feature. And +yet, could he doubt it? No; triumph was glittering in her sparkling eye; +in vain he looked for sympathy in his disappointment, if love were +denied him. He gazed on her, and the truth suddenly flashed on his mind; +he marked the triumph with which she heard his offer; no softening +emotion was in her countenance. In vain he tried to ascribe its +expression to some other feeling; it was triumph, he could not be +deceived; and with agony St. Eval discovered that the being he had +almost worshipped was not the faultless creature he had believed her; +she had played with his feelings; she had encouraged him, heightened his +love, merely to afford herself amusement. The visions of hope, of fancy +were rudely dispelled, and perhaps at that moment it was better for his +peace that he suddenly felt she was beneath his love; she was not worthy +to be his wife. He no longer esteemed; and if love itself were not +utterly snapped asunder, the loss of esteem enabled him to act in that +interview with pride approaching to her own. He reproached her not: no +word did he utter that could prove how deeply he was wounded, and thus +add to the triumph so plain to be perceived. That she had sunk in his +estimation she might have seen, but other feelings prevented her +discovering how deeply. Had she veiled her manner more, had she rejected +him with kindness, St. Eval might still have loved, and imagined that +friendship and esteem had actuated her conduct towards him. Yet those +haughty features expelled this thought as soon as it arose. It was on +the night of a gay assembly St. Eval had found an opportunity to speak +with Caroline, and when both rejoined the gay crowd no emotion was +discernible in the countenance of either. St. Eval was the same to all +as usual. No one who might have heard his eloquent discussion on some +state affairs with the Russian consul could have imagined how painfully +acute were his sufferings; it was not only disappointed love--no, his +was aggravated bitterness; he could no longer esteem the object of his +love, he had found himself deceived, cruelly deceived, in one he had +looked on almost as faultless; and where is the pang that can equal one +like this? The heightened colour on Caroline's cheek, the increased +brilliancy of her eye, attracted the admiration of all around her, the +triumph of power had indeed been achieved. But when she laid her head on +her pillow, when the silence and darkness of night brought the past to +her mind more vividly, in vain she sought forgetfulness in sleep. Was it +happiness, triumph, that bade her bury her face in her hands and weep, +weep till almost every limb became convulsed by her overpowering +emotion? Her thoughts were undefined, but so painful, that she was +glad--how glad when morning came. She compared her present with her +former self, and the contrast was misery; but even as her ill-fated aunt +had done, she summoned pride to stifle every feeding of remorse. + +Mr. Hamilton had given his sanction to the addresses of Lord St. Eval to +his daughter; but he knew not when, the young man intended to place the +seal upon his fate. Great then was his astonishment, the morning +following the evening we have mentioned, when St. Eval called to bid him +farewell, as he intended, he said, leaving London that afternoon for his +father's seat, where he should remain perhaps a week, and then quit +England for the Continent. He spoke calmly, but there was a paleness of +the cheek, a dimness of the eye, that told a tale of inward +wretchedness, which the regard of Mr. Hamilton could not fail instantly +to discover. Deeply had he become interested in the young man, and the +quick instinct combined with the fears of a father, told him that the +conduct of Caroline had caused this change. He looked at the expressive +countenance of the young Earl for a few minutes, then placing his hand +on his shoulder, said kindly, but impressively-- + +"St. Eval, you are changed, as well as your plans. You are unhappy. What +has happened? Have your too sensitive feelings caused you to fancy +Caroline unkind?" + +"Would to heaven it were only fancy!" replied St. Eval, with unwonted +emotion, and almost convulsively clenching both hands as if for +calmness, added more composedly, "I have been too presumptuous in my +hopes; I fancied myself beloved by your beautiful daughter, but I have +found myself painfully mistaken." + +Sternness gathered on the brow of the father as he heard, and he +answered, with painful emphasis-- + +"St. Eval, deceive me not, I charge you. In what position do you now +stand with Caroline?" + +"Briefly, then, if I must speak, in the humble character of a rejected, +scornfully rejected lover." His feelings carried him beyond control. The +triumph he had seen glittering so brightly in the eyes of Caroline had +for the time turned every emotion into gall. He shrunk from the agony it +was to find he was deceived in one whom he had believed so perfect. + +"Scorn! has a daughter of mine acted thus? Encourage, and then scorn. +St. Eval, for pity's sake, tell me! you are jesting; it is not of +Caroline you speak." So spoke the now agonized father, for every hope of +his child's singleness of mind and purity of intention appeared at once +blighted. He grasped St. Eval's hand, and looked on him with eyes from +which, in the deep disappointment of his heart, all sternness had fled. + +"I grieve to cause you pain, my dear friend," replied the young Earl, +entering at once into the father's feelings, "but it is even so. Your +daughter has only acted as many, nay, as the majority of her sex are +fond of doing. It appears that you, too, have marked what might be +termed the encouragement she gave me. My self-love is soothed, for I +might otherwise have deemed my hopes were built on the unstable +foundation of folly and presumption." + +"And condemnation of my child is the fruit of your self-acquittal, St. +Eval, is it not? You despise her now as much as you have loved her," and +Mr. Hamilton paced the room with agitation. + +"Would almost that I could!" exclaimed St. Eval; the young Earl then +added, despondingly, "no, I deny not that your child has sunk in my +estimation; I believed her exalted far above the majority of her sex; +that she, apparently all softness and truth, was incapable of playing +with the most sacred feelings of a fellow-creature. I looked on her as +faultless; and though the veil has fallen from my eyes, it tells me that +if in Caroline Hamilton I am deceived, it is useless to look for +perfection upon earth. Yet I cannot tear her image from my heart. She +has planted misery there which I cannot at present overcome; but if that +triumph yields her pleasure, and tends to her happiness, be it so; my +farther attention shall no longer annoy her." + +Much disturbed, Mr. Hamilton continued to pace the room, then hastily +approaching the young Earl, he said, hurriedly-- + +"Forget her, St. Eval, forget her; rest not till you have regained your +peace. My disappointment, that of her mother--our long-cherished hopes, +but it is useless to speak of them, to bring them forward, bitter as +they are, in comparison with yours. Forget her, St. Eval; she is +unworthy of you," and he wrung his hand again and again, as if in that +pressure he could conquer and conceal his feelings. At that instant +Emmeline bounded joyfully into the room, unconscious that any one was +with her father, and only longing to tell him the delightful news that +she had received a long, long letter from Mary, telling her of their +safe arrival at Geneva, at which place Mrs. Greville intended to remain +for a few weeks, before she proceeded more southward. + +"Look, dear papa, is not this worth receiving?" she exclaimed, holding +up the well-filled letter, and looking the personification of innocent +and radiant happiness, her fair luxuriant hair pushed in disorder from +her open forehead and flushed cheek, her blue eyes sparkling with +irresistible glee, which was greatly heightened by her glowing smiles. +It was impossible to look on Emmeline without feeling every ruffled +emotion suddenly calmed; she was so bright, so innocent, so fair a +thing, that if peace and kindness had wished to take up their abode on +earth, they could not have found a fairer form wherein to dwell. As St. +Eval gazed upon the animated girl, he could not help contrasting her +innocent and light-hearted pleasure with his own unmitigated sorrow. + +"Your presence and your joy are mistimed, my dear Emmeline; your father +appears engaged," said Mrs. Hamilton, entering almost directly after her +child, and perceiving by one glance at her husband's face that +something had chanced to disturb him. "Control these wild spirits for a +time till he is able to listen to you." + +"Do not check her, my dear Emmeline, I am not particularly engaged. If +St. Eval will forgive me, I would gladly hear some news of our dear +Mary." + +"And pray let me hear it also. You know how interested I am in this dear +friend of yours, Emmeline," replied St. Eval, struggling with himself, +and succeeding sufficiently to speak playfully; for he and Emmeline had +contrived to become such great allies and intimate friends, that by some +sympathy titles of ceremony were seldom used between them, and they were +Eugene and Emmeline to each other, as if they were indeed brother and +sister. + +Laughingly and delightedly Emmeline imparted the contents of her letter, +which afforded real pleasure both to Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, by the more +cheerful, even happier style in which she had written. + +"Now do you not think I ought to be proud of my friend, Master Eugene? +is she not one worth having?" demanded Emmeline, sportively appealing to +the young Earl, as she read to her father some of Mary's affectionate +expressions and wishes in the conclusion. + +"So much so, that I am seized with an uncontrollable desire to know her, +and if you will only give me a letter of introduction, I will set off +for Geneva next week." + +Emmeline raised her laughing eyes to his face, with an expression of +unfeigned amazement. + +"A most probable circumstance," she said, laughing; "no, Lord St. Eval, +you will not impose thus on my credulity. Eugene St. Eval, the most +courted, flattered, and distinguished, leave London before the season +is over--impossible." + +"I thank you for the pretty compliments you are showering on me, my +little fairy friend, but it is nevertheless true. I leave England for +the Continent next week, and I may as well bend my wandering steps to +Geneva as elsewhere." + +"But what can you possibly be going on the Continent again for? I am +sure, by all the anecdotes you have told me, you must have seen all that +is worth seeing, and so why should poor England again be deserted by one +of the ablest of her sons?" + +"Emmeline!" exclaimed her mother, in an accent of warning and reproach, +which brought a deep crimson flush to her cheek, and caused her eyes to +glisten, for Mrs. Hamilton had marked that all was not serene on the +countenance of the Earl, and her heart beat with anxious alarm; for she +knew his intentions with regard to Caroline, and all she beheld and +heard, startled, almost terrified her. Lord St. Eval certainly looked a +little disturbed at Emmeline's continued questions, and perceiving it, +she hesitatingly but frankly said-- + +"I really beg your pardon, my lord, for my unjustifiable curiosity; +mamma is always reproving me for it, and certainly I deserve her lecture +now. But will you really find out Mary, and be the bearer of a small +parcel for me?" + +"With the greatest pleasure; for it will give me an object, which I had +not before, and a most pleasing one, if I may hope your friend will not +object to my intrusion." + +"A friend of mine will ever be warmly welcomed by Mary," said Emmeline, +with eagerness, but checking herself. + +"Then may I hope you will continue to regard me as your friend, and +still speak of me as Eugene, though perhaps a year or more may pass +before you see me again?" demanded the young Earl, somewhat sadly, +glancing towards Mrs. Hamilton, as if for her approval. + +"As my brother Eugene--yes," answered Emmeline, quickly, and perhaps +archly. A shadow passed over his brow. + +"As your _friend_" he repeated, laying an emphasis on the word, which to +any one less innocent of the world than Emmeline, would at once have +excited their suspicion, and which single word at once told Mrs. +Hamilton that all her cherished hopes were blighted. She read +confirmation in her husband's countenance, and for a few minutes stood +bewildered. + +"I leave town in a few hours for my father's seat," added St. Eval, +turning to Mrs. Hamilton. "I may amuse myself by taking Devonshire in my +way, or rather going out of my way for that purpose. Have you any +commands at Oakwood that I can perform?" + +Mrs. Hamilton answered thankfully in the negative, but Emmeline +exclaimed-- + +"I have a good mind to make you bearer of a letter and a _gage d'amour_ +to my good old nurse; she will be so delighted to hear of me, and her +postman a nobleman. Poor nurse will have food for conversation and +pleasurable reflection till we return." + +"Anything you like, only make me of use; and let me have it in an hour's +time, or perhaps I can give you two." + +"One will be all-sufficient; but what a wonderful desire to be useful +has seized you all in a minute," replied Emmeline, whose high spirits +appeared on that day utterly uncontrollable, and she ran on unmindful of +her mother's glance. "But if I really do this, I must bid you farewell +at once, or I shall have no time. Think of me, if anything extraordinary +meets your eye, or occurs to you, and treasure it up for my information, +as you know my taste for the marvellous. My letter to Mary shall be +forwarded to you, for I really depend on your seeking her, and telling +her all about us; and now, then, with every wish for your pleasant +journey, I must wish you good-bye." + +"Good-bye, dear, happy Emmeline," he said, with earnestness. "May you be +as light-hearted and joyous, and as kind, when we meet again as now; may +I commission you with my warmest remembrances and kind adieus to your +cousin, whom I am sorry I have not chanced to see this morning?" + +"They shall be duly delivered," answered Emmeline, and kissing her hand +gaily in adieu, she tripped lightly out of the room, and St. Eval +instantly turned towards Mrs. Hamilton. + +"In this intention of leaving England for a few months, or perhaps a +year," he said, striving for calmness, but speaking in a tone of +sadness, "you will at once perceive that my cherished hopes for the +future are blighted. I will not linger on the subject, for I cannot yet +bear disappointment such as this with composure. Were I of different +mould, I might, spite of coldness and pride, continue my addresses; and +were you as other parents are, Caroline--Miss Hamilton might still be +mine; a fashionable marriage it would still be, but, thank God, such +will not be; even to bestow your child on one you might value more than +me, you would not trample on her affections, you would not consent that +she should be an unwilling bride, and I--oh! I could not--could not wed +with one who loved me not. My dream of happiness has ended--been +painfully dispelled; the blow was unexpected, and has found me +unprepared. I leave England, lest my ungoverned feelings should lead me +wrong. Mrs. Hamilton," he continued, more vehemently, "you understand my +peculiar feelings, and can well guess the tortures I am now enduring. +You know why I am reserved, because I dread the outbreak of emotion even +in the most trifling circumstances. Oh, to have been your son--" he +paused abruptly, and hurriedly paced the room. "Forgive me," he said, +more calmly. "Only say you approve of my resolution to seek change for a +short time, till I obtain self-government, and can behold her without +pain; say that I am doing right for myself. I cannot think." + +"You are right, quite right," replied Mrs. Hamilton instantly, and her +husband confirmed her words. "I do approve your resolution, though +deeply, most deeply, I regret its cause, St. Eval. Your disappointment +is most bitter, but you grieve not alone. To have given Caroline to you, +to behold her your wife, would have fulfilled every fervent wish of +which she is the object. Not you alone have been deceived; her conduct +has been such as to mislead those who have known her from childhood. St. +Eval, she is not worthy of you." + +Disappointed, not only at the blighting of every secret hope, not those +alone in which St. Eval was concerned, but every fond thought she had +indulged in the purity and integrity of her child, in which, though her +confidence had been given to another, she had still implicitly trusted, +the most bitter disappointment and natural displeasure filled that +mother's heart, and almost for the first time since their union Mr. +Hamilton could read this unwonted emotion, in one usually so gentle, in +her kindling eyes and agitated voice. + +"Child of my heart, my hopes, my care, as she is, I must yet speak it, +forget her, Eugene; let not the thought of a deceiver, a coquette, debar +you from the possession of that peace which should ever be the portion +of one so truly honourable, so wholly estimable as yourself. You are +disappointed, pained; but you know not--cannot guess the agony it is to +find the integrity in which I so fondly trusted is as naught; that my +child, my own child, whom I had hoped to lead through life without a +stain, is capable of such conduct." + +Emotion choked her voice. She had been carried on by the violence of her +feelings, and perhaps said more in that moment of excitement than she +either wished or intended. + +St. Eval gazed on the noble woman before him with unfeigned admiration. +He saw the indignation, the displeasure which she felt; it heightened +the dignity of her character in his estimation; but he now began to +tremble for its effects upon her child. + +"Do not, my dear Mrs. Hamilton," he said, with some hesitation, "permit +Miss Hamilton's rejection of me to excite your displeasure towards her. +If with me she could not be happy, she was right to refuse my hand. Let +me not have the misery of feeling I have caused dissension in a family +whose beautiful unity has ever bound me to it. Surely you would not urge +the affections of your child." + +"Never," replied Mrs. Hamilton, earnestly. "I understand your fears, +but let them pass away. I shall urge nothing, but my duty I must do. +Much as I admire the exalted sentiments you express, I must equally +deplore the mistaken conduct of my child. She has wilfully sported with +the most sacred of human feelings. Once more I say, she is not worthy to +be yours." + +The indignation and strong emotion still lingering in her voice +convinced St. Eval that he might urge no more. Respectfully he took his +leave. + + + + +CHAPTER V. + + +Mrs. Hamilton sat silently revolving in her mind all Caroline's late +conduct, but vainly endeavouring to discover one single good reason to +justify her rejection of St. Eval. In vain striving to believe all must +have been mistaken, she had not given him encouragement. That her +affections could have become secretly engaged was a thing so unlikely, +that even when Mrs. Hamilton suggested it, both she and her husband +banished the idea as impossible; for St. Eval alone had she evinced any +marked preference. + +"You must speak to her, Emmeline, I dare not; for I feel too angry and +disappointed to argue calmly. She has deceived us; all your cares appear +to have been of no avail; all the watchful tenderness with which she had +been treated thus returned! I could have forgiven it, I would not have +said another word, if she had conducted herself towards him with +propriety; but to give him encouragement, such as all who have seen them +together must have remarked; to attract him by every winning art, to +chain him to her side, and then reject him with scorn. What could have +caused her conduct, but the wish to display her power, her triumph over +one so superior? Well might he say she had sunk in his estimation. Why +did we not question her, instead of thus fondly trusting in her +integrity? Emmeline, we have trusted our child too confidently, and thus +our reliance is rewarded." + +Seldom, if ever, had Mrs. Hamilton seen her husband so disturbed; for +some little time she remained with him, and succeeded partly in soothing +his natural displeasure. She then left him to compose her own troubled +and disappointed feelings ere she desired the presence of her child. +Meanwhile, as the happy Emmeline went to prepare her little packet for +her dear old nurse, the thought suddenly arose that St. Eval had sent +his remembrances and adieus to Ellen only, he had not mentioned +Caroline; and unsophisticated as she was, this struck her as something +very strange, and she was not long in connecting this circumstance with +his sudden departure. Wild, sportive, and innocent as Emmeline was, she +yet possessed a depth of reflection and clearness of perception, which +those who only knew her casually might not have expected. She had marked +with extreme pleasure that which she believed the mutual attachment of +St. Eval and her sister; and with her ready fancy ever at work, had +indulged very often in airy visions, in which she beheld Caroline +Countess St. Eval, and mistress of that beautiful estate in Cornwall, +which she had heard Mrs. Hamilton say had been presented by the Marquis +of Malvern to his son on his twenty-first birthday. Emmeline had +indulged these fancies, and noticed the conduct of Caroline and St. +Eval till she really believed their union would take place. She had been +so delighted at the receipt of Mary's letter, that she had no time to +remember the young Earl's departure; but when she was alone, that truth +suddenly flashed across her mind, and another strange incident, though +at the time she had not remarked it, when she had said as her brother +she would remember him, he had repeated, with startling emphasis, "as +her _friend_." "What could it all mean?" she thought. "Caroline cannot +have rejected him? No, that is quite impossible. My sister would surely +not be such a practised coquette. I must seek her and have the mystery +solved. Surely she will be sorry St. Eval leaves us so soon." + +Emmeline hastened first to Ellen, begging her to pack up the little +packet for Mrs. Langford, for she knew such an opportunity would be as +acceptable to her cousin as to herself; for Ellen never forgot the +humble kindness and prompt attention she had received from the widow +during her long and tedious illness; and by little offerings, and what +the good woman still more valued, by a few kind and playful lines, which +ever accompanied them, she endeavoured to prove her sense of Widow +Langford's conduct. + +In five minutes more Emmeline was in her sister's room. Caroline was +partly dressed as if for a morning drive, and her attendant leaving just +as her sister entered. She looked pale and more fatigued than usual, +from the gaiety of the preceding night. Happy she certainly did not +look, and forgetting in that sight the indignation which the very +supposition of coquetry in her sister had excited, Emmeline gently +approached her, and kissing her cheek, said fondly-- + +"What is the matter, dear Caroline? You look ill, wearied, and even +melancholy. Did you dance more than usual last night?" + +"No," replied Caroline; "I believe not. I do not think I am more tired +than usual. But what do you come for, Emmeline? Some reason must bring +you here, for you are generally hard at work at this time of the day." + +"My wits have been so disturbed by Mary's letter, that I have been +unable to settle to anything," replied her sister, laughing; "and to add +to their disturbance, I have just heard something so strange, that I +could not resist coming to tell you." + +"Of what nature?" + +"St. Eval leaves London to-day for Castle Malvern, and next week quits +England. Now is not that extraordinary?" + +Caroline became suddenly flushed with crimson, which quickly receding, +left her even paler than before. + +"She is innocent," thought Emmeline. "She loves him. St. Eval must have +behaved ill to her; and yet he certainly looked more sinned against than +sinning." + +"To-day: does he leave to-day?" Caroline said, at length, speaking, it +appeared, with effort, and turning to avoid her sister's glance. + +"In little more than an hour's time; but I am sorry I told you, dear +Caroline, if the news has pained you." + +"Pained me," repeated her sister, with returning haughtiness; "what can +you mean, Emmeline? Lord St. Eval is nothing to me." + +"Nothing!" repeated the astonished girl. "Caroline, you are +incomprehensible. Why did you treat him with such marked attention if +you cared nothing for him?" + +"For a very simple reason; because it gave me pleasure to prove that it +was in my power to do that for which other girls have tried in +vain--compel the proud lordly St. Eval to bow to a woman's will." Pride +had returned again. She felt the pleasure of triumphant power, and her +eyes sparkled and her cheek again flushed, but with a different emotion +to that she had felt before. + +"Do you mean, then, that you have never loved him, and merely sported +with his feelings, for your own amusement? Caroline, I will not believe +it. You could not have acted with such cruelty; you do love him, but you +reject my confidence. I do not ask you to confide in me, though I did +hope I should have been your chosen friend; but I beseech, I implore +you, Caroline, only to say that you are jesting. You do love him." + +"You are mistaken, Emmeline, never more so in your life. I have refused +his offered hand; if you wish my confidence on this subject, I give it +you. As he is a favourite of yours, I do not doubt your preserving his +secret inviolate. I might have been Countess of St. Eval, but my end was +accomplished, and I dismissed my devoted cavalier." + +"And can you, dare you jest on such a subject?" exclaimed Emmeline, +indignantly. "Is it possible you can have wilfully acted thus? sported +with the feelings of such a man as St. Eval, laughed at his pain, called +forth his love to gratify your desire of power? Caroline, shame on you!" + +"I am not in the habit of being schooled as to right and wrong by a +younger sister, nor will I put up with it now, Emmeline. I never +interfere with your conduct, and therefore you will, if you please, do +the same with me. I am not responsible to you for my actions, nor shall +I ever be," replied Caroline, with cold yet angry pride. + +"But I will speak, when I know you have acted contrary to those +principles mamma has ever endeavoured to instill into us both," replied +Emmeline, still indignantly; "and you are and have been ever welcome to +remonstrate with me. I am not so weak as I once was, fearful to speak my +sentiments even when I knew them to be right. You have acted shamefully, +cruelly, Caroline, and I will tell you what I think, angry as it may +make you." + +A haughty and contemptuous answer rose to Caroline's lips, but she was +prevented giving it utterance by the entrance of Martyn, her mother's +maid, with her lady's commands that Miss Hamilton should attend her in +the boudoir. + +"How provoking!" she exclaimed. "I expect Annie to call for me every +minute, and mamma will perhaps detain me half an hour;" and most +unwillingly she obeyed the summons. + +"Annie," repeated Emmeline, when her sister had left the room, +"Annie--this is her work; if my sister had not been thus intimate with +her she never would have acted in this manner." And so disturbed was the +gentle girl at this confirmation of her fears, that it was some little +time before she could recover sufficient serenity to rejoin Ellen in +arranging the widow's packet. + +Mrs. Langford had the charge of Oakwood during the absence of the +family, and Mrs. Hamilton, recollecting some affairs concerning the +village schools she wished the widow to attend to, was writing her +directions as Caroline entered, much to the latter's increased +annoyance, as her mother's business with her would thus be retarded, and +every minute drew the time of Annie's appointment nearer. She could +scarcely conceal her impatience, and did venture to beg her mother to +tell her what she required. + +"Your attention, Caroline, for a time," she replied, so coldly, that her +daughter felt instantly something was wrong, though what she guessed +not, for she knew not that St. Eval had obtained the sanction of her +parents for his addresses; and she little imagined he could have +anything to do with the displeasure she saw so clearly marked. + +"You will wait, if you please, till I have finished writing, as this +cannot be delayed. Lord St. Eval leaves town in a very short time, and I +send this by him." + +"Lord St. Eval," thought Caroline, suddenly becoming alarmed, "surely +mamma and papa know nothing of his offer." + +A few minutes passed in silence, which was broken by the sound of +carriage-wheels stopping at the door, and Robert almost instantly after +entered with Miss Grahame's love, saying she could not wait a minute, +and hoped Miss Hamilton was ready. + +"Miss Grahame!" repeated Mrs. Hamilton, in an accent of surprise, before +Caroline had time to make any answer; "Caroline, why have you not +mentioned this engagement? You do not generally make appointments +without at least consulting me, if you no longer think it necessary to +request my permission. Where are you going with Annie?" + +"To Oxford Street, I believe," she answered carelessly, to conceal her +rising indignation at this interference of her mother. + +"If you require anything there, you can go with me by and bye. Robert, +give my compliments to Miss Grahame, and say from me, Miss Hamilton is +particularly engaged with me at present, and therefore cannot keep her +engagement to-day. Return here as soon as you have delivered my +message." + +"Mother!" burst from Caroline's lips, in an accent of uncontrollable +anger, as soon as the servant had left the room; but with a strong +effort she checked herself, and hastily walked to the window. + +An expression of extreme pain passed across her mother's features as she +looked towards her, but she took no notice till Robert had returned, and +had been dismissed with her note to be given to Emmeline to transmit +with hers. + +"Caroline," she then said, with dignity, yet perhaps less coldly than +before, "if you will give me your attention for a short time, you will +learn the cause of my displeasure, which is perhaps at present +incomprehensible, unless, indeed, your own conscience has already +reproached you; but before I commence on any other subject, I must +request that you will make no more appointments with Miss Grahame +without my permission. This is not the first time you have done so; I +have not noticed it previously, because I thought your own good sense +would have told you that you were acting wrong, and contrary to those +principles of candour I believed you to possess." + +"You were always prejudiced against Annie," answered Caroline, with +rising anger, for she had quite determined not to sit silent while her +mother spoke, cost what it might. + +"I am not speaking of Annie, Caroline, but to you. The change in your +conduct since you have become thus intimate with her, might indeed +justify my prejudice, but on that I am not now dwelling. I do not +consider Miss Malison a fit chaperon for my daughter, and therefore I +desire you will not again join her in her drives." + +"Every other girl of my station has the privilege of at least choosing +her own companions without animadversion," replied Caroline, +indignantly, "and in the simple thing of making appointments without +interference it is hard that I alone am to be an exception." + +"If you look around the circle in which I visit intimately, Caroline, +you will find that did you act according to your own wishes, you would +stand more alone than were you to regard mine. I have done wrong in ever +allowing you to be as intimate with Miss Grahame as you are. You looked +surprised and angry when I mentioned the change that had taken place in +your conduct." + +"I had sufficient reason for surprise," replied Caroline, impatiently, +"I was not aware that my character was so weak, as to turn and change +with every new acquaintance." + +"Are you then the same girl you were at Oakwood?" demanded Mrs. +Hamilton, gravely yet sadly. + +A sudden pang of conscience smote the heart of the mistaken girl at +these words, a sob rose choking in her throat, and she longed to have +given vent to the tears which pride, anger, and remorse were summoning, +but she would not, and answered according to those evil whisperings, +which before she had only indulged in secret. + +"If I am changed," she answered passionately, "it is because neither you +nor papa are the same. At Oakwood I was free, I had full liberty to act, +speak, think as I pleased, while here a chain is thrown around my +simplest action; my very words are turned into weapons against me; my +friendship disapproved of, and in that at least surely I may have +liberty to choose for myself." + +"You have," replied Mrs. Hamilton mildly. "I complain not, Caroline, of +the pain you have inflicted upon me, in so completely withdrawing your +confidence and friendship, to bestow them upon a young girl. I control +not your affection, but it is my duty, and I will obey it, to warn you +when I see your favourite companion likely to lead you wrong. Had your +every thought and feeling been open to my inspection as at Oakwood, +would you have trifled as you have with the most sacred feelings of a +fellow-creature? would you have called forth love by every winning art, +by marked preference to reject it, when acknowledged, with scorn, with +triumph ill concealed? would you have sported thus with a heart whose +affections would do honour to the favoured one on whom they were +bestowed? would you have cast aside in this manner all that integrity +and honour I hoped and believed were your own? Caroline, you have +disappointed and deceived your parents; you have blighted their fondest +hopes, and destroyed, sinfully destroyed, the peace of a noble, +virtuous, excellent young man, who loved you with all the deep fervour +of an enthusiastic soul. To have beheld him your husband would have +fulfilled every wish, every hope entertained by your father and myself. +I would have intrusted your happiness to his care without one doubt +arising within me; and you have spurned his offer, rejected him without +reason, without regret, without sympathy for his wounded and +disappointed feelings, without giving him one hope that in time his +affection might be returned. Caroline, why have you thus decidedly +rejected him? what is there in the young man you see to bid you tremble +for your future happiness?" + +Caroline answered not; she had leaned her arms on the cushion of the +couch, and buried her face upon them, while her mother spoke, and Mrs. +Hamilton in vain waited for her reply. + +"Caroline," she continued, in a tone of such appealing affection, it +seemed strange that it touched not the heart of her child, "Caroline, I +will not intrude on your confidence, but one question I must ask, and I +implore you to answer me truly--do you love another?" + +Still Caroline spoke not, moved not. Her mother continued, "If you do, +why should you hide it from me, your own mother, Caroline? You believe +my conduct changed towards you, but you have condemned me without proof. +You have abandoned my sympathy--shrunk from my love. Try me now, my +sweet child; if you love another, confess it, and we will do what we can +to make that love happy; if it be returned, why should you conceal it? +and if it be not, Caroline, my child, will you refuse even the poor +comfort your mother can bestow?" + +She spoke in vain; but could she have read her daughter's heart at that +moment, maternal affection might not have been so deeply pained as it +was by this strange silence. Regret, deep, though unavailing, had been +Caroline's portion, from the moment she had reflected soberly on her +rejection of St. Eval. She recalled his every word, his looks of +respectful yet ardent admiration, and she wept at that infatuation which +had bade her act as she had done; and then his look of controlled +contempt stung her to the quick. He meant not, perhaps, that his glance +should have so clearly denoted that she had sunk in his estimation, it +did not at the moment, but it did when in solitude she recalled it, and +she felt that she deserved it. In vain in those moments did she struggle +to call up the vision of Lord Alphingham, his words of love, his looks +of even more fervid passion, his image would not rise to banish that of +St. Eval; and if Caroline had not still been blinded by the influence +and arguments of Annie, had she given her own good sense one half-hour's +uncontrolled dominion, she would have discovered, that if love had +secretly and unsuspiciously entered her heart, it was not for Lord +Alphingham. Had she really loved him, she could not have resisted the +fond appeal of her mother; but to express in words all the confused and +indefinable emotions then filling her heart was impossible. She +continued for several minutes silent, and Mrs. Hamilton felt too deeply +pained and disappointed to speak again. Her daughter had spoken to her +that morning as she had seldom done even in her childhood. Then her +mother could look forward to years of reason and maturity for the +improvement of those errors; now others had arisen, and if her control +were once so entirely thrown aside, could she ever regain sufficient +influence to lead her right. Seldom had Caroline's conduct given her so +much pain as in the disclosures and events of that morning. + +"Is it absolutely necessary," Caroline at length said, summoning, as her +aunt Eleanor had often done, pride to drown the whisperings of +conscience, "that I must love another, because I rejected Lord St. Eval? +In such an important step as marriage, I should imagine my own +inclinations were the first to be consulted. It would be strange indeed, +if, after all I have heard you say on the evil of forcing young women to +marry, that you should compel your own child to accept the first offer +she received." + +"You do me injustice, Caroline," replied her mother, controlling with an +effort natural displeasure; "St. Eval would not accept an unwilling +bride, nor after what has passed would your father and myself deem you +worthy to become his wife." + +"Then long may this paragon of excellence remain away," replied +Caroline, with indignant haughtiness kindling in every feature. "I have +no wish ever to associate again with one by whose side I am deemed so +unworthy, even by my parents." + +"Those who love you best, Caroline, are ever the first to behold and +deplore your faults. Have you acted honourably? have you done worthily +in exciting love merely to give pain, to amuse and gratify your own love +of power?" + +"I have done no more than other girls do with impunity, without even +notice; and surely that which is so generally practised cannot demand +such severe censure as you bestow on it." + +"And therefore you would make custom an excuse for sin, Caroline. Would +you have spoken thus a few months since? would you have questioned the +justice of your mother's sentences? and yet you say you are not changed. +Is it any excuse for a wrong action, because others do it? Had you been +differently instructed it might be, but not when from your earliest +years I have endeavoured to reason with, and to convince you of the sin +of coquetry, to which from a child you have been inclined. You have +acted more sinfully than many whose coquetry has been more general. You +devoted yourself to one alone, encouraged, flattered, because you saw he +was already attracted, instead of adhering to that distant behaviour +which would have at once told him you could feel no more for him than as +a friend. You would have prevented future suffering, by banishing from +the first all secret hopes; but no, you wished to prove you could +accomplish more than others, by captivating one so reserved and superior +as St. Eval. Do not interrupt me by a denial, Caroline, for you dare not +deliberately say such was not your motive. That noble integrity which I +have so long believed your own, you have exiled from your heart. Your +entire conduct towards St. Eval has been one continued falsehood, and +are you then worthy to be united to one who is truth, honour, nobleness +itself? Had you loved another, your rejection of this young man might +have been excused, but not your behaviour towards him; for that not one +good reason can be brought forward in excuse. I am speaking severely, +Caroline, and perhaps my every word may alienate your confidence and +affection still farther from me; but my duty shall be done, painful as +it may be both to yourself and me. I cannot speak tamely on a subject in +which the future character and welfare of my child are concerned. I can +no longer trust in your integrity. Spite of your change in manner and in +feeling towards me, I still confided in your unsullied honour; that I +can no longer do, you have forfeited my confidence, Caroline, and not +until I see a total change of conduct can you ever hope to regain it. +That perhaps will not grieve you, as it would once have done; but unless +you redeem your character," she continued "the serious displeasure of +both your father and myself will be yours, and we shall, in all +probability, find some means of withdrawing you from the society which +has been so injurious to the purity of your character. Whatever others +may do, it is your duty to act according to the principles of your +parents, and not to those of others; and therefore, for the future, I +desire you will abide by my criterion of right and wrong, and not by the +misleading laws of custom. When you have conquered the irritation and +anger which my words have occasioned, you may perhaps agree to the +justice of what I have said, till then I do not expect it; but whether +your reason approves of it or not, I desire your implicit obedience. If +you have anything you desire to do, you may leave me, Caroline, I do not +wish to detain you any longer." + +In silence, too sullen to give any hope of a repentant feeling or +judgment, convinced, Caroline had listened to her mother's words. They +were indeed unusually severe; but her manner from the beginning of that +interview could not have lessened the displeasure which she already +felt. We have known Mrs. Hamilton from the commencement of her career, +when as a girl not older than Caroline herself, she mingled with the +world, and we cannot fail to have perceived her detestation of the +fashionable sin of coquetry. The remembrance of Eleanor and all the +evils she entailed upon herself by the indulgence of that sinful fault, +were still vividly acute, and cost what it might, both to herself and, +who was dearer still, her child, she would do her duty, and endeavour to +turn her from the evil path. She saw that Caroline was in no mood for +gentle words and tenderness to have any effect, and therefore, though at +variance as it was to her nature, she spoke with some severity and her +usual unwavering decision. She could read no promise of amendment or +contrition in those haughty and sullen features, but she urged no more, +for it might only exasperate and lead her farther from conviction. + +For some few minutes Caroline remained in that same posture. Evil +passions of varied nature suddenly appeared to gain ascendancy in that +innately noble heart, and prevented all expressions that might have +soothed her mother's solicitude. Hastily rising, without a word, she +abruptly left the room, and retired to her own, where she gave vent to a +brief but passionate flood of tears, but they cooled not the fever of +her brain; her haughty spirit revolted from her mother's just severity. + +"To be scolded, threatened, desired to obey, like a child, an infant; +what girl of my age would bear it tamely? Well might Annie say I was a +slave, not permitted to act or even think according to my own +discretion; well might she say no other mother behaved to her daughters +as mine; to be kept in complete thraldom; to be threatened, if I do not +behave better, to be removed from the scenes I so much love, buried +again at home I suppose; is it a wonder I am changed? Is it strange that +I should no longer feel for mamma as formerly? and even Emmeline must +condemn me, call me to account for my actions, and my intimacy with +Annie is made a subject of reproach; but if I do not see her as often as +before, I can write, thank heaven, and at least her sympathy and +affection will be mine." + +Such was the tenor of her secret thoughts, and she followed them up by +writing to her friend a lengthened and heightened description of all +that had occurred that morning, dwelling long and indignantly on what +she termed the cruel and unjust severity of her mother, and imploring, +as such confidential letters generally did, Annie's secrecy and +sympathy. The epistle was despatched, and quickly answered, in a style +which, as might be imagined, increased all Caroline's feelings of +indignation towards her parents, and bade her rely still more +confidingly on her false friend, who, she taught herself to believe, was +almost the only person who really cared for her best interests. + +Days passed, but neither Mr. nor Mrs. Hamilton changed in the coldness +of their manner towards their child. Perhaps such conduct added fire to +the already resentful girl; but surely they might be pardoned for acting +as they did. Caroline's irritability increased, and Annie's secret +letters were ever at hand to soothe while they excited. She ever +endeavoured to turn her friend's attention from what she termed her +severe trials to the devotion felt towards her by Lord Alphingham, +declaring that each interview confirmed more and more her belief in his +passionate admiration. The evil influence which Miss Grahame's letters +had upon the mind of Caroline in her private hours, was apparent in her +manner to Lord Alphingham, when they chanced to meet, but even more +guarded than she had hitherto been, did Caroline become in her behaviour +towards him when her parents were present. Their conduct had confirmed, +to her heated and mistaken fancy, Annie's representation of their +unjustifiable severity, and that, indignant at her rejection of St. +Eval, they would unhesitatingly refuse their consent to her acceptance +of the Viscount. Caroline thought not to ask herself how then is my +intimacy with him to end? She only enjoyed the present as much as she +could, while the coldness of her parents, amidst all her pride and +boasted stoicism, still tortured her; and to the future Annie as yet +completely prevented her looking. Miss Grahame's plans appeared indeed +to thrive, and many were the confidential and triumphant conversations +she held upon the subject with Miss Malison, who became more and more +indignant at Mrs. Hamilton's intrusive conduct in taking so much notice +of Lilla, notwithstanding the tales industriously circulated against +her. Her own severity and malevolence, however, appeared about to become +her foes; for about this time a slight change with regard to the +happiness of her injured pupil took place, which threatened to banish +her from Mr. Grahame's family. + +One morning Mrs. Hamilton, accompanied by Ellen, called on Lady Helen +rather earlier than usual, but found their friend not yet visible, an +attack of indisposition confining her to her couch later than usual, +but Lady Helen sending to entreat her friend not to leave her house +without seeing her, Mrs. Hamilton determined on waiting. Annie had gone +out with Miss Malison. + +"No wonder our poor Lilla proceeds but slowly in her education," +remarked Mrs. Hamilton, when the footman gave her this information. "If +she be so much neglected, her father has no right to expect much +progress. I wish from my heart that I could think of some plan that +would tend not only to the happiness of this poor girl, but in the end +to that of her father also. Were those faults now apparent in her +character judiciously removed, I feel confident Mr. Grahame would have +more comfort in her than in either of his other children." + +"She is always very different when she is with us," observed Ellen. "I +can never discover those evil passions of which so many accuse her; +passionate she is, but that might be controlled." + +"It never can he while Miss Malison remains with her, for her treatment +is such that each year but increases the evil." A sound as of some one +sobbing violently in the adjoining room interrupted their conversation. +Fancying it came from the object of their conversation, Mrs. Hamilton +opened the folding-doors, and discovered her young friend weeping +violently, almost convulsively, on the sofa. Ever alive to sorrow, of +whatever nature or at whatever age, Mrs. Hamilton, followed by Ellen, +hastened towards her. + +"What has happened, Lilla?" she said, soothingly. "What has chanced to +call forth this violent grief? tell me, my love. You know you need not +hesitate to trust me with your sorrows." + +Unused, save from that one dear friend, to hear the voice of sympathy +and kindness, Lilla flung her arms passionately round her neck, and +clung to her for some few minutes till her choking sobs permitted her to +speak. + +"Aunt Augusta says I am so wicked, so very wicked, that mamma ought not +to keep me at home, that I am not at all too old to go to school, and +mamma says that I shall go--and--and"-- + +"But what occasioned your aunt to advise such an alternative?" demanded +Mrs. Hamilton, gently. + +"Oh, because--because I know I was very wicked, but I could not help it. +Miss Malison had been tormenting me all the morning, and exciting my +anger; and then Annie chose to do all she could to call it forth before +mamma, and so I just told her what I thought of both her and her amiable +confidant. I hate them both," she continued, with a vehemence even the +presence of Mrs. Hamilton could not restrain, "and I wish from my heart +I could never see them more." + +"If you gave vent to such sinful words before your mother," replied Mrs. +Hamilton, gravely, "I do not wonder at your aunt's suggesting what she +did. How often have I entreated you to leave the room when your sister +commences her unkind endeavours to excite your anger, and thus give your +mother a proof of your consideration for her present state of health, +and evince to your sister, that if you cannot calmly listen to her +words, you can at least avoid them." + +"Mamma never takes any notice, however much I may endeavour to please +her; if she would only caress me, and praise me sometimes, I know I +should be a very different girl. Then I could bear all Annie's cruel +words; but I will not, I will never put up with them, and permit either +her or Miss Malison to govern me and chain down my spirit, as they try +all they can to do. No one can ever know the constant ill-treatment +which I receive from both; everything I do, every word I speak, is +altered to suit their purpose, and mamma believes all they say. They +shall feel my power one day when they least expect it. I will not be +made so constantly miserable unrevenged." + +"Lilla, dear Lilla," exclaimed Ellen, imploringly, "do not speak thus; +you do not know what you say. You would not return evil for evil, and on +your sister. Do not, pray do not let your anger, however just, obtain so +much dominion." + +"Annie never treats me as a sister, and I do not see why I should +practise such forbearance towards her; but I will do all I can, indeed I +will, if you will persuade papa not to send me from home. Oh, do not +look at me so gravely and sadly, dearest, dearest Mrs. Hamilton," +continued the impetuous and misguided but naturally right feeling child. + +"I can bear any one's displeasure but yours; but when you look +displeased with me I feel so very, very wretched. I know I deserve to +lose all your kindness, for I never follow your advice; I deserve that +you should hate me, as every one else does; but you do not know all I +have to endure. Oh! do not let me go from home." + +"I cannot persuade your father to let you remain at home, my dear girl," +replied Mrs. Hamilton, drawing her young companion closer to her, and +speaking with soothing tenderness, "because I agree with your aunt in +thinking it would be really the best thing for you." + +"Then I have lost every hope," exclaimed the impatient girl, clasping +her hands despairingly. "Papa would never have consented, if you had +advised him not, and you, you must think me as wicked as aunt Augusta +does;" and the tears she had checked now burst violently forth anew. + +"You mistake me, my love, quite mistake me; it is not because I believe +you are not fitted to associate with your domestic circle. I believe if +she were but properly encouraged, my little Lilla would add much to the +comfort of both her parents; and I do not at all despair of seeing that +the case. But at present I must advise your leaving home for a few +years, because I really do think it would add much to your happiness." + +"Happiness!" repeated Lilla, in an accent of extreme surprise. "School +bring happiness?" + +"Are you happy at home, my love? is not your life at present one +continued scene of wretchedness? What is it that you so much dislike in +the idea of school?" + +"The control, the subordination, the irksome formula of lessons, prim +governesses, satirical scholars." Neither Mrs. Hamilton nor Ellen could +prevent a smile. + +"If such things are all you dread, my dear, I have no fear of soon +overcoming them," the former said, playfully. "I will do all I can to +persuade your father not to send you to a large fashionable seminary, +where such things may be the case; but I know a lady who lives at +Hampstead, and under whose kind guidance I am sure you will be happy, +much more so than you are now. If you would only think calmly on the +subject, I am sure you would agree in all I urge." + +"But no one treats me as a reasonable person at home. If mamma sends me +to school, it will not be for my happiness, but because everybody thinks +me so wicked, there is no managing me at home; and then in the holidays +I shall hear nothing but the wonderful improvement school discipline has +made, it will be no credit to my own efforts, and so there will be no +pleasure in making any." + +"Will there be no pleasure in making your father happy, Lilla? Will his +approbation be nothing?" + +"But he never praises me; I am too much afraid of him to go and caress +him, as I often wish to do, and tell him if he will only call me his +dear Lilla, I would be good and gentle, and learn all he desires. If he +would but let me love him I should be much happier than I am." + +Mrs. Hamilton thought so too; and deeply she regretted that mistaken +sternness which had so completely alienated the affections of his child. +Soothingly she answered-- + +"But your father dearly loves you, Lilla, though, perhaps your violent +conduct has of late prevented his showing it. If you were, for his sake, +to become gentle and amiable, and overcome your fears of his sternness, +believe me, my dear Lilla, you would be rendering him and yourself much +happier. You always tell me you believe everything I say. Suppose you +trust in my assertion, and try the experiment; and if you want a second +voice on my side, I appear to your friend Ellen for her vote as to the +truth of what I say." + +Mrs. Hamilton spoke playfully, and Ellen answered in the same spirit. +Lilla's passionate tears had been checked by the kind treatment she +received, and in a softened mood she answered-- + +"But I cannot become so while Miss Malison has anything to do with me. +I cannot bear her treatment gently. Papa does not know all I have to +endure with her." + +"And therefore do I so earnestly wish you would consent to my persuading +your father to let you go to Hampstead," answered Mrs. Hamilton, gently. + +"But then papa will not think it is for his sake I endeavour to correct +my faults; he will say it is the school, and not my own efforts; and if +I go, I shall never, never see you, nor go to dear Moorlands, for I +shall be away while papa and mamma are there; away from everybody I +love. Oh, that would not make me happy!" and clinging to Mrs. Hamilton, +the really affectionate girl again burst into tears. + +"What am I to urge in reply to these very weighty objections, my dear +Lilla?" replied Mrs. Hamilton. "In the first place, your father shall +know that every conquest you make is for his sake; he shall not think +you were forced to submission. In the next, compulsion is not in my +friend's system, and as I am very intimate with Mrs. Douglas, I shall +very often come and see you when I am in town, your midsummer holidays +will also occur during that time: and, lastly, if your papa and mamma +will consent, you shall see Moorlands every year; for I shall ask Mr. +Grahame to bring you with him in his annual Christmas visit to his +estate, and petition that he will leave you behind him to spend the +whole of your winter vacation with me and Ellen at Oakwood. Now, are all +objections waived, or has my very determined opponent any more to bring +forward?" + +Lilla did not answer, but she raised her head from her kind friend's +shoulder, and pushing back the disordered locks of her bright hair, +looked up in her face as if no more sorrow could be her portion. + +"Oh, I would remain at school a whole year together, if I might spend my +vacation at Oakwood with you, and Ellen, and Emmeline, and all!" she +exclaimed, with a glee as wild and childish as all her former emotion +had been. Lady Helen at that instant entered, and after languidly +greeting Mrs. Hamilton and Ellen, exclaimed-- + +"For heaven's sake, Lilla, go away! your appearance is enough to +frighten any one. I should be absolutely ashamed of you, if any friend +were to come in unexpectedly. Perhaps you may choose to obey me now that +Mrs. Hamilton is present; she little knows what a trouble you are at +home," she continued, languidly. + +The flush of passion again mounted to Lilla's cheek, but Ellen, taking +her arm, entreated to go with her, and they left the room together, +while Lady Helen amused her friend by a long account of her domestic +misfortunes, the insolence of her upper domestics, the heedlessness of +her elder, and the fearful passions of her younger daughter, even the +carelessness of her husband's manner towards her, notwithstanding her +evidently declining health, all these and similar sorrows were poured +into the sympathising ear of Mrs. Hamilton, and giving clearer and +clearer evidence of Lady Helen's extreme and increasing weakness of mind +and character. + +Great, indeed, was the astonishment of this indolent mother when Mrs. +Hamilton urged the necessity of sending Lilla to school. Without +accusing Miss Malison of any want of judgment, she was yet enabled to +work on Lady Augusta Denhain's words, and prove the good effects that a +removal from home for a few years might produce on Lilla's character. + +Lady Augusta's advice had been merely remembered during that lady's +presence, but seconded as it now was by the earnest pleadings of Mrs. +Hamilton, she determined on rousing herself sufficiently to put it in +force, if her husband consented; but to obtain his approbation was a +task too terrible for her nerves, and she entreated Mrs. Hamilton to +speak with him on the subject. Willingly she consented, only requesting +that Lady Helen would not mention her intentions either to Annie or Miss +Malison till her husband had been consulted, and to this Lady Helen +willingly consented, for in secret she dreaded Miss Malison's +lamentations and reproaches, when this arrangement should be known. + +When Mr. Grahame, in compliance with Mrs. Hamilton's message, called on +her the following morning, and heard the cause of his summons, his +surprise almost equalled that of his wife. He knew her dislike to the +plan of sending girls to school, however it might be in vogue; and +almost in terror he asked if she proposed this scheme because the evil +character of his child required some such desperate expedient. It was +easy to prove to him such was very far from her meaning. She spoke more +openly on the character of Lilla than she had yet done, for she thought +their long years of intimacy demanded candour on her part; and each +year, while it increased the evil of Lilla's present situation +heightened her earnest desire to draw the father and child more closely +together. She did not palliate her faults, but she proved that they were +increased by the constant contradiction and irritation which she had to +encounter. She repeated all that had passed between them the preceding +day, unconsciously and cautiously condemning Grahame's excessive +sternness, by relating, almost verbatim, Lilla's simply expressed wish +that her father would let her love him. + +She gained her point. The softened and agitated father felt +self-condemned as she proceeded; and earnestly implored her to give him +one more proof of her friendship, by recommending him some lady under +whose care he could with safety place his erring, yet naturally +noble-minded and warm-hearted child. A fashionable seminary, he was +sure, would do her more harm than good, and he listened with eagerness +to Mrs. Hamilton's description of Mrs. Douglas. The widow of a naval +officer, who had for several years been in the habit of educating ten +young ladies of the highest rank, and she mentioned one or two who had +been her pupils, whose worth and mental endowments were well known to +Grahame. + +"Do not be guided entirely by me on a subject so important," she said, +after recalling those families to his mind, whose daughters had been +placed there; "make inquiries of all who know Mrs. Douglas, and see her +yourself before you quite decide. That I have a very high opinion of her +is certain; but I should be sorry if you were to place Lilla with her +upon my advice alone, when, in all probability," she added, with a +smile, "you will find all Lady Helen's family opposed to the +arrangement." + +"As they have never guided me right when they have interfered with my +children, their approbation or disapproval will have little weight in my +determination," answered Grahame. "You have awakened me to a sense of +my duty, Mrs. Hamilton, for which I cannot sufficiently express my +gratitude. With too much reliance upon the opinions of others I have +regarded the many tales brought against my poor child, and now I see how +greatly her faults have been occasioned by mistaken treatment. I thought +once I could never have parted with a daughter for school, but now I see +it will be a kindness to do so; and pain me as it will, now I know that +I may in time win her affections, your advice shall be followed." + +"You must consent to part with her for one vacation also," replied Mrs. +Hamilton, playfully. "I have promised, in answer to her weighty +objection that she shall never see Moorlands again, to persuade you to +let her spend Christmas at Oakwood. You must consent, or I shall teach +Lilla a lesson of rebellion, and carry her off from Mrs. Douglas by +force." + +"Willingly, gratefully," exclaimed Mr. Grahame. + +"And you will promise me to permit her to love you, to use her own +simple affectionate words before she leaves you; you will not terrify +her by the cold sternness you frequently manifest towards her, and prove +that you take sufficient interest in her, to love her more for every +conquest she makes." + +"Faithfully, faithfully I promise, my kind friend." + +"Then I am satisfied," replied Mrs. Hamilton, her countenance glowing +with benevolent pleasure. "I shall, I trust, one day succeed in making +my little Lilla happy, and thus add to the comfort of her parents. We +are old friends, Mr. Grahame," she added, "and therefore I do not +hesitate to express the pleasure you have given me by thus promising to +think upon my advice. I began to fear that you would be displeased at +my interference, deeming my advice impertinent and needless. I have +endeavoured to impress upon Lilla the necessity of a temporary absence +from home, and have in part succeeded; and having Lady Helen's sanction +to speak with you, I could hesitate no longer." + +"Nor do I hesitate one moment to act upon your disinterested advice, my +dear friend. Your word is enough; but as you so earnestly wish it, I +will this very hour seek those of my friends who are acquainted with +Mrs. Douglas. I must leave Lilla to express her gratitude for her father +and herself." + +Mrs. Hamilton was soon placed at rest regarding the destination of her +young friend. There was not a dissenting voice as to Mrs. Douglas's +worth, one general opinion of satisfaction prevailed; but the most +gratifying tribute Grahame felt, was the affection and esteem which her +former pupils still fondly encouraged towards her. Thus prepossessed, +her appearance and manners did much to strengthen his resolve, and +Grahame now felt armed for all encounters with those who, presuming on +their near relationship to his wife, would bring forward numberless +objections to his plans; but he was agreeably mistaken. Lilla was looked +upon by them all as such an evil-minded, ill-informed girl, that it +signified little where she was placed, as she generally brought +discredit on all who had anything to do with her. Miss Malison, however, +excited their sympathy, and Annie declared it was a shameful and +dishonourable thing to dismiss her without notice, after so many years +of devoted service to their family. Poor Lady Helen had to encounter the +storm of upbraiding from her daughter, and the tears and sobs of the +governess, at the ill-treatment she received. In vain Lady Helen +accepted her protestations that she had done her duty; that she was sure +all that could be done for Miss Lilla had been done. Annie declared +that, though her services were no longer required for her ungrateful +sister, she could not do without Miss Malison, for her mother's health +seldom permitted her to walk or drive out. She should absolutely die of +_ennui_ without some one to act in those cases as her chaperon. In this +she was ably seconded by all her mother's family, whose _protĂ©gĂ©e_ Miss +Malison had long been, and, against his better judgment, Grahame at +length consented that Miss Malison should remain in his family till she +should get another situation as finishing governess. This, of course, +Miss Grahame had determined should not be for some little time. + +Mrs. Hamilton had been particularly cautious, in her interview with Mr. +Grahame, not to speak any word for or against Miss Malison; perhaps had +she said what she really thought, even this concession would not have +been made. + +Mr. Grahame's fixed and sudden determination to send Lilla to school +was, of course, laid by Annie and her confidant to Mrs. Hamilton's +charge, and increased not a little their prejudice against her, adding +fresh incentive to their schemes for the destruction of her peace, which +Caroline's self-willed conduct now rendered even more easy than it had +previously been. + +When all was arranged, when it was decidedly settled that Lilla should +join Mrs. Douglas's establishment at the conclusion of the midsummer +vacation, her father quietly entered the study where she was alone, to +give her this information, and his really fond heart could not gaze on +her without admiration. She was now nearly fifteen, though in looks, +manners, and conversation, from being kept under such continual +restraint, she always appeared at first sight very much younger. +Childlike in every movement, even her impetuosity might have aided the +deception; and Lady Helen herself had so often indolently answered +questions concerning her daughter's age, she believed she was about +twelve or thirteen, that at length she really believed it was so. It was +Annie and Miss Malison's interest to preserve this illusion; for were +she recognised as fifteen, many privileges might have been acceded to +her, very much at variance with their interest. Annie had no desire for +a rival to present herself, which, had her sister appeared in public, +would undoubtedly have been the case; Lilla gave promise of beauty, +which, though not perhaps really so perfect as Annie's, would certainly +have attracted fully as much notice. She was drawing a tiny wreath of +brilliant flowers on a small portfolio, which she was regarding with a +complacency that added brilliancy to her animated features. At her +father's well-known step she looked up in some little terror, and rose, +as was her custom whenever she first saw him in the morning; her fear +could not check the sparkling lustre of her eye, and Grahame, taking her +hand, said kindly-- + +"I have some news for my little girl, which I trust will prove as +agreeable as I have every reason to hope they may. Mrs. Douglas will +gladly consent to receive my Lilla as an inmate of her happy family." + +The flush of animation, the sparkling lustre of her eye faded on the +instant, and she turned away. + +"Why, our kind friend, Mrs. Hamilton, bade me hope this would be +pleasing intelligence; has she deceived me, love?" continued her father, +drawing her with such unwonted tenderness to him, that, after a glance +of bewilderment, she flung her arms round his neck, and for the first +time in her life wept passionately on her father's shoulder. + +"Can it be pleasure to hear I am to go from you and mamma?" she +exclaimed, clinging to him with all the passionate warmth of her nature, +and forgetting all her terror in that one moment of uncontrolled +feeling. Her simple words confirmed at once all that Mrs. Hamilton had +said in her favour, and the now gratified father seated her, as he would +a little child, on his knee, and with affectionate caresses gradually +soothed her to composure. Long did they converse together, and from that +moment Lilla's happiness commenced. She could not at once lose her dread +of her father's sternness, but the slightest hint from him was enough; +and frequently, as Grahame felt her affectionate manner, would he wonder +he had been blind to her character so long. The idea of school lost its +repugnance. Her father's kindness enabled her to keep her determination, +to prove, by the indulgence of the highest spirits, that going to +school, instead of being a punishment, as her aunt Augusta intended it +to be, was a privilege and a pleasure. That she was accused of want of +feeling she little heeded, now that her father invited and encouraged +her affection. Lady Helen wondered at her change of manner, but +indolence and the prejudice constantly instilled by Annie and Miss +Malison, prevented all indulgence of more kindly feelings. As things +remained in this state for some weeks in Mr. Grahame's establishment, we +will now return to Mr. Hamilton's family. + +It was about this time, some three or four weeks before the end of the +Oxford term, that letters arrived from Percy and Herbert, containing +matters of interesting information, and others which caused some anxiety +in the breast of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton. On the first subject both the +brothers wrote, so deeply interested had they become in it. Among the +servitors or free scholars of their college was a young man, whom they +had frequently noticed the last year, but never recollected having seen +before. He shrunk, as it appeared in sensitiveness from every eye, kept +aloof from all companions, as if he felt himself above those who held +the same rank in the University. Herbert's gentle and quickly +sympathising heart had ever felt pained, when he first went to college, +to see the broad distinction made between the servitors and other +collegians. He felt it pain to see them, as, in their plain gowns and +caps, they stood or sat apart from their brother students at their +meals, but perceiving by degrees they were all happy in their rank, +being, in general, sons of the poorer and less elevated classes of +society, happy to obtain an excellent education free of expense, he had +conquered these feelings, and imagined justly that they were, in all +probability, indifferent to the distinction of rank. But one amongst +them had recalled all these kindly sentiments, not only in the heart of +Herbert but in that of Percy, who was in general too reckless to regard +matters so minutely as his brother. The subject of their notice was a +young man, perhaps some two or three years older than the heir of +Oakwood, but with an expression of melancholy, which frequently amounted +almost to anguish, ever stamped on his high and thoughtful brow, and his +large, searching, dark grey eye. He was pale, but it appeared more from +mental suffering than disease, and at times there was a proud even a +haughty curl on his lip, that might have whispered he had seen better +days. He was never observed to be familiar with his brother servitors, +and shrunk with proud humility from the notice of his superiors. The +servile offices exacted from those of his degree were performed with +scrupulous exactness, but Herbert frequently beheld at such times a +flush of suffering mount into his cheek, and when his task was done, he +would fold his arms in his gown, and drop his head upon them, as if his +spirit revolted in agony from its employment. The other servitors were +fond of aping their superiors, by a studied affectation of similar dress +and manner, but this young man was never once seen to alter his plain +even coarse costume, and kept aloof from all appearance that would +assimilate him with those above him; and yet he was their +laughing-stock, the butt against which the pointed arrows of scorn, +contumely, ridicule, and censure were ever hurled, with a malevolence +that appeared strange to the benevolent hearts of the young Hamiltons, +who vainly endeavoured to check the public torrent. "He was not always +as he is now, and then, poor Welshman as he _is_, he always lorded it +over us, and we will requite him now," was the only reply they obtained; +but the first sentence touched a chord in Herbert's heart. Misfortune +might have reduced him to the rank he now held, and perhaps he struggled +vainly to teach his spirit submission; but how could he obtain his +friendship, in what manner succeed in introducing himself. Herbert was +naturally too reserved to make advances, however inclination prompted, +and some months passed in inactivity, though the wish to know him, and +by kindness remove his despondency, became more and more powerful to the +brothers. + +A side attack one day on the young Welshman, made with unwonted and +bitter sarcasm by an effeminate and luxurious scion of nobility, roused +the indignation of Percy. Retorting haughtily on the defensive, a +regular war of tongues took place. The masterly eloquence of Percy +carried the day, and he hoped young Myrvin was free from all further +attacks. He was mistaken: another party, headed by the defeated but +enraged Lord, who had been roused to a state of fury by young Hamilton's +appearance, surrounded the unhappy young man in the college court, and +preventing all egress, heaped every sarcastic insult upon him, words +that could not fail to sting his haughty spirit to the quick. Myrvin's +eye flashed with sudden and unwonted lustre, and ere Herbert, who with +his brother had hastily joined the throng, could prevent it, he had +raised his arm and felled his insulting opponent to the ground. A wild +uproar ensued, the civil officers appeared, and young Myrvin was +committed, under the charge of wilfully, and without provocation, +attacking the person of the right honourable Marquis of --. + +The indignation of Percy and Herbert was now at its height; and without +hesitation the former sought the principal of his college, and in a few +brief but emphatic sentences placed the whole affair before him in its +true light, condemning with much feeling the cowardly and cruel conduct +of the true aggressors, and so convinced the worthy man of the injustice +done towards the person of young Myrvin, that he was instantly +released, with every honour that could soothe his troubled feelings, +and a severe reprimand bestowed on the real authors of the affray. + +Percy pursued his advantage; the noble heart of the young Welshman was +touched by this generous interference in his behalf, and when the +brothers followed him in his solitary walk the following day, he +resisted them not. Gratefully he acknowledged the debt he owed them, +confessed he would rather have received such a benefit from them than +from any others in the college, and at length, unable to resist the +frankly proffered friendship of Percy, the silent entreaty of Herbert, +he grasped with convulsive pressure their offered hands, and promised +faithfully he would avoid them no more. From that hour the weight of his +reverses was less difficult to bear. In the society, the conversation of +Herbert, he forgot his cares; innate nobleness was visible in Myrvin's +every thought, act, and word, and he became dear indeed to the soul of +Herbert Hamilton, even as a brother he loved him. Warm, equally warm +perhaps, was the mutual regard of Myrvin and Percy, though the latter +was not formed for such deep unchanging emotion evinced in the character +of his brother. But it was not until some time after the commencement of +their friendship that Herbert could elicit from his companion the +history of his former life. + +It was simply this:--Arthur Myrvin was the only child of the rector of +Llangwillan, a small village in Wales, about ten or twelve miles from +Swansea. The living was not a rich one, but its emoluments enabled Mr. +Myrvin to live in comparative affluence and comfort; beloved, revered by +his parishioners, enabled to do good, to bestow happiness, to impart +the knowledge of the Christian faith, he beheld his flock indeed walking +in the paths of their Heavenly Shepherd. He had been enabled by the +economy of years to save sufficient to place his son respectably and +comfortably at college, and it was with no little pride he looked +forward to the time when those savings would be used for their +long-destined purpose. Arthur had grown beneath his eye; he had never +left his father's roof, and Mr. Myrvin trusted had imbibed principles +that would preserve him from the temptations of college life, and so +strong was this hope, that he parted from his son without one throb of +fear. + +The sudden change in his life was, however, too tempting an ordeal for +the young man. He associated with those above him both in rank and +fortune, who leading him into their extravagant follies, quickly +dissipated his allowance, which, though ample, permitted not +extravagance. About this time the noble proprietor of the Llangwillan +parish died, and its patronage fell to the disposal of a gay and +dissipated young man, who succeeded to the large estates. Inordinately +selfish, surrounded by ready flatterers, eager of gain, he was a +complete tyrant in his domains. + +The excessive beauty and fertility of Llangwillan, the industry and +simple habits of the inhabitants, excited the desire of possessing it in +the mind of one of these humble sycophants, and his point was very +speedily gained. Justice and humanity were alike banished from the code +of laws now in action, and, without preparation or excuse, Mr. Myrvin +was desired to quit that parish which had been his so long. His +incumbency expired with the death of the proprietor, and it had been +already disposed of. The grief of the old man and his humble friends was +long and deep; it was not openly displayed, the lessons of their beloved +pastor had too well instructed them in the duty of resignation; but aged +cheeks were wet with unwonted tears, and mingled with the sobs of +childhood. Men, women, youth, and little children alike wept, when their +pastor departed from the village. He who had been the shepherd of his +flock so long, was now cast aside as a worthless thing, and the old +man's heart was wellnigh broken. In a rude cot, forced on his acceptance +by a wealthy parishioner, situated some eight or ten miles from the +scene of his happiness, he took up his abode, and to him would the +villagers still throng each Sabbath, as formerly to the humble church, +and old Myrvin, in the midst of his own misfortunes, found time to pray +for that misguided and evil-directed man who had succeeded him in his +ministry, and brought down shame on his profession, and utterly +destroyed the peace which Llangwillan had enjoyed so long. + +Resignation by degrees spread over Myrvin's mind, but the conduct of his +son caused him fresh anxiety. The news of the change in his father's +life awakened Arthur from his lethargy; he saw the folly, the imprudence +of which he had been guilty; his father could no longer support him at +college. In three years he had squandered away that which, with economy, +would have served as maintenance for ten, and now he must leave the +college, or do that from which at first his very soul revolted; but the +image of his father, his injured father, rose before him. He could not +inflict upon him a disappointment so severe as his departure from +college would be. He would yet atone for his folly, and fulfil his +father's long-cherished hopes, and without consulting him, in a moment +of desperation, he sought the resident head of the University, and +imparted his wishes. The preliminaries were quickly settled, and the +next letter from Oxford which Mr. Myrvin received, contained the +intelligence that his son had reconciled his mind to the change, and +become a servitor. + +A glow of thanksgiving suffused the old man's heart, but he knew all the +inward and outward trials with which his son had to contend. Had he at +the first joined the college in the rank which he now held, he might not +have felt the change so keenly; but as it was, the pride and haughtiness +which had characterised him before, were now, as we have seen, returned +tenfold upon himself. He clothed himself outwardly in an invulnerable +armour of self-control and cold reserve, but inwardly his blood was in +one continued fever, until the friendship of Percy and Herbert soothed +his troubled feelings. The name of Hamilton, Herbert continued to state, +for it was he who wrote particularly of Arthur, the young man had +declared he knew well; but where he had heard it, or how, appeared like +a dream. He thought he had even seen Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton once, not +very many years ago; but so many changes in his life had occurred since +then, that the particulars of that meeting he could not remember. +"Myrvin and Llangwillan appear equally familiar to me," wrote Herbert; +"but even more than to Arthur they seem as the remembrances of an +indistinct dream. It has sometimes occurred to me that they are combined +with the recollection of my aunt, Mrs. Fortescue, and Arthur, to whom I +mentioned her death, suddenly recalled a dying lady and her two +children, in whom his father was very much interested. Fortescue he does +not well remember, but the little girl's name was Ellen, a pale, +dark-eyed and dark-haired, melancholy child, whom he used to call his +wife, and my cousin certainly answers this description. If it be indeed +the same, it is strange we should thus come together; and oh! my dearest +father, the benefit our family received from this venerable and injured +man, bids me long more intently that we could do something for him, and +that Arthur should be restored to his former position. He is of full +age, and quite capable of taking orders, and I have often thought, could +he reside with Mr. Howard the year previous to his ordination, it would +tend much more to his happiness and welfare than remaining here, even if +he was released from that grade, the oppression of which now hangs so +heavily upon him. Follies have been his, but they have been nobly +repented; and something within me whispers that the knowledge he is my +dearest and most intimate friend, that we mutually feel we are of +service to each other, will plead his cause and my request to my kind +and indulgent father, with even more force than the mere relation of +facts, interesting as that alone would be." + +He was right. The friend, the chosen and most intimate friend of their +younger son would ever have been an object of interest to Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton. That he was the son of the same good man who had acted so +benevolently towards Eleanor and her orphan children, who had soothed +her dying bed, and reconciled the parting sinner to her Maker, added +weight to the simple yet pathetic eloquence with which Herbert had +related his story. The injury he had sustained excited their just +indignation, and if the benevolence of their kind hearts had required +fresh incentives, the unfeigned grief of Ellen, as the tale of the old +man was related to her, would have given it. + +"Oh, that I had it in my power to offer a sufficient sum to tempt the +sordid and selfish being in whose possession Llangwillan now is," she +was heard one day to exclaim, when she imagined herself alone, "that I +might but restore it to Mr. Myrvin; that I might feel that good old man +was passing his latter years in the spot and amongst all those he so +much loved; that Arthur could break the chain that now so bitterly and +painfully distresses him. Dear, dear Mr. Myrvin, oh, how little did I +imagine, when my thoughts have wandered to you and Arthur, who was such +a dear consoling friend in my childish sorrow, that misery such as this +had been your portion; and I can do nothing, nothing to prove how often +I have thought of and loved you both--and my dear mother's grave, in the +midst of strangers," and she wept bitterly, little imagining her +soliloquy had been overheard by her aunt and uncle, who were almost +surprised at her vivid remembrance of those whom for the last seven +years she had scarcely seen, and of whom she so seldom heard; but it +heightened their desire to be of service to him who had once been so +kind a friend to their family. + +The contents of Percy's letter, to the rather alarming and mysterious +nature of which we have already alluded, will be found in the next +chapter. + + + + +CHAPTER VI. + + +"Malison, dear Malison, congratulate me; the game is in my own hands!" +exclaimed Miss Grahame one morning as she entered the private room of +her confidant, about a week after the receipt of the letters we have +mentioned, with every feature expressing triumphant yet malignant glee. + +"That has been the case some weeks, has it not?" replied Miss Malison. + +"Yes; but not so completely as at present. Caroline has just left me; +she was afraid of imparting in writing the important intelligence she +had to give me, important indeed, for it saves me a world of trouble: +though did I allow myself to think on her present situation of +suffering, I believe that I should repent her perfect and innocent +confidence in me. Her defence of my character, whenever it is attacked, +almost touches my heart; but her mother, her intrusive mother, that +would-be paragon of her sex, rises before me and continually urges me +on; she shall learn, to her cost, that her carefully-trained children +are not better than others." + +"She has learned it partly already, by your account," remarked Miss +Malison, concealing under a calm exterior her detestation of Mrs. +Hamilton. + +"She has. That rejection of St. Eval assisted me most agreeably; I did +not expect that Caroline's own spirit and self-will would have aided me +so effectually. That disappointment with St. Eval has affected Mrs. +Hamilton more deeply than she chooses to make visible. Her coldness and +severity towards her child spring from her own angry and mortified +feelings; however, she lays it to the score of Caroline's faulty +conduct, and my friendly letters have happily convinced Caroline such +is the case. In my most sanguine expectations of triumph, I never +imagined I should succeed so well in severing the link between Mrs. +Hamilton and her daughter. Confidence is utterly at an end between them, +and that would be sufficient to gratify any one but myself; but my +vengeance for the prejudice and dislike with which this perfect creature +regards me must be more fully satisfied, at present it is only soothed. +Now you know, _chère_ Malison, you are dying with curiosity to hear what +new assistance has started up; a little more patience and you shall know +all. You are aware with what bitter and resentful feelings Caroline +regards the treatment she receives from her parents, and also from +Emmeline, child as she is." + +"Perfectly; nor do I wonder at it. In this case the immaculate Mrs. +Hamilton does not appear to practise what she preaches. It is rather +wonderful, that one who says so much about gentle treatment doing more +good than harshness, should now make her own child suffer beneath her +severity.'" + +"As I said before, Malison, her severity is but a disguise for +mortification and annoyance. Lord St. Eval, the heir of the Malvern +peerage, was too good a chance to be thrown away without vexation. +Caroline was a silly fool to act as she did, I must say that for her, +grateful as I ought to be for the assistance that foolish act has given +me. As for rejecting him merely for love of Alphingham, it is a complete +farce. She no more loves the Viscount than I do; perhaps not so much. I +make her believe she does, and so I intend to do till my plan is fully +accomplished; but love him as she would have done, as in all +probability, at the present moment, she loves Lord St. Eval, she does +not and never will. I shall make a fashionable pair, but not a love +match, Malison, believe me." + +"That Mrs. Hamilton may have the exquisite pleasure of seeing her +daughter like other people, however different she may choose to be +herself; you will rather do her a kindness than an injury, my dear Miss +Grahame." + +"Fortunately for my purpose, she will not think so. I shall, through +Caroline, inflict a deeper wound than I ever thought to have done. No +other injury would have touched her; she prides herself on Christian +forbearance and patience, and such like, which, simply translated, would +be found to be nothing but haughtiness and pride, and utter +insensibility to human feelings; but if Caroline goes wrong, elopes, +perhaps, as her aunt did, disregards parental commands, and acts in the +weighty affair of matrimony for herself, why that will be something like +a triumph for my diplomatic schemes." + +"You must work well on Caroline's mind to produce such a consummation," +observed Miss Malison. "I doubt much whether she would ever act in a +manner that she would believe so contrary to her duty. I would advise +you never to give her time to reflect." + +"I never mean to do so. If the silly girl had ever reflected at all, she +would at once have known that she loved St. Eval and not Lord +Alphingham; that her mother is her truest friend, and not Annie Grahame; +but as she chooses to remain so stupidly blind and trusting, why I see +no harm in playing my part, and as for her consenting, let her but hear +the honourable Viscount's sweet persuasive eloquence and look on his +handsome and pleading features, and consent will quickly be obtained." + +"But why should he not demand her at once of her father? Mr. Hamilton is +always friendly with him when they meet." + +"You have just hit the mark, _ma chère_. That very truth was always a +stumbling block in my machinations, for I almost feared, by Mr. +Hamilton's manner towards him, that the interesting tales concerning his +youth, which I had intended should be poured into his wife's ear, might +be disregarded; such from the first had been my intention, but I have +felt puzzled in a degree how to set about it." + +"Nay, you do yourself injury, my dearest Miss Grahame," observed the +ex-governess, officiously. "From your earliest years you were never +puzzled at anything." + +"My wits deserted me then for the moment," replied Annie, laughing, "and +would perhaps have returned when my plot was ripe for execution; but I +am happy to say I can dispense with their assistance, as I have received +it most effectually from a member of Mr. Hamilton's own family." + +"How!" exclaimed Miss Malison, much astonished. + +"Even so, _ma chère_; and now we come to the important intelligence +Caroline brought me this morning. It appears, that last week Mr. +Hamilton received a letter from Percy, which by her account must have +contained some mysterious warning against this very Lord Alphingham, +that his attentions to Caroline had been not only remarked, but reported +to him, and conjuring his father, as he valued Caroline's future peace, +to dismiss him at once and peremptorily. Thus much Mr. Hamilton imparted +to his daughter, a few days after the receipt of this letter, and after +bestowing some little approbation on her conduct towards him, which you +know before her parents is always particularly cold and guarded, he +requested, or rather desired, that she would gradually withdraw herself +entirely from his society, as he had received quite sufficient +confirmation of that letter to render him anxious to break off all +further communication and acquaintance with him. Caroline is such a +simpleton, I wonder she could prevent her countenance from betraying her +as he spoke; but I suppose she did, for Mr. Hamilton expressed himself +satisfied by her assurance that his wishes should not be forgotten. +Whether this letter contains other and more explicit matter she does not +know, but her state of mind at present is miserable enough to touch any +heart that is not quite so steeled as mine. I could almost smile at her +fond belief that she really loves him, for I see my own work, no tender +passion as she imagines; and to break off all intercourse with him +appears comparative torture. I have already convinced her of her +father's injustice and cruelty in acting thus capriciously towards one +so well known and so universally honoured, and merely from a mysterious +and unsatisfactory letter from a boy who knows nothing about the matter. +I hinted very broadly that it was only because her parents were provoked +at her rejection of St. Eval; and as they still had a lingering hope he +would return, they did not choose her to receive attentions from any one +else. I saw her eyes flash and her cheek crimson with indignation +against all who had thus injured her; and she declared with more +vehemence than I expected, that neither father nor mother, nor Percy, +should prevent her choosing a husband for herself. A violent burst of +tears succeeded this speech; but I continued to soothe and console her, +and she left me with a spirit vowed and determined to free herself from +such galling tyranny. And what do you think had been her mood when she +first came to me?" + +Miss Malison, as expected, expressed ignorance. + +"Why, the weak simpleton thought of confessing her whole tale of love to +her mother, and imploring comfort and assistance." + +"Take care she does not do so still," remarked Miss Malison. + +"Not she. I have proved too clearly how ridiculous and miserable she +would make herself by such a _dĂ©nouement_. Her mother, I said, instead +of pitying, would assuredly condemn her for all the past, and most +probably convey her at once to Oakwood, and immure her there till Lord +St. Eval came to release her. She was both terrified and indignant at +the idea." + +"No wonder she should be; but do you know if she or her father have seen +Lord Alphingham since the arrival of this letter?" + +"But once, last night; and it was the fancied anguish felt for his +distress, which she was unable, as usual, to soothe, in consequence of +the keen _surveillance_ of her mother, that brought her here this +morning to tell me all. Mr. Hamilton was still courteous, but more +distant. I have convinced her, that as her parents no longer treat her +with confidence, she has no right to treat them with any; and as every +one knows the worthy character of the Viscount, she can be doing nothing +wrong in proving to him that her feelings in his favour are unchanged. +She has hinted to me to explain the situation in which she is placed, +but _entre nous_, I mean to do no such thing, for I have a plan of my +own to follow up. She is not aware how very intimate I am with the +Viscount, and how much he confides in me; all my persuasions will tend +to urge him to ask her of her father, and I am sure nothing can be more +honourable than that course of action." + +"Nothing, I am sure," echoed the conscientious confidant; "but how will +that assist your former scheme?" + +"Most admirably. Mr. Hamilton will, of course, decidedly refuse his +consent, without even consulting his daughter; the anger of Lord +Alphingham will be overpowering; rage against the father, and love for +the daughter will urge him to any and every means to obtain her hand. +Caroline's indignation against her father for acting in this way and +treating her so much like a child, feelings which I shall take care to +create and foster, will second his eloquence, and I feel quite certain +that next season Caroline Hamilton mingles in the most fashionable +circles as the Viscountess Alphingham; and to obtain such a triumphant +end, in my opinion, no means are faulty." + +"Most assuredly not. Not only the young lady herself, but her whole +family ought to be eternally grateful, for without such manoeuvring I +doubt much whether the perfect daughter or the self-satisfied mother +would obtain an establishment in all things so desirable. Enraged as she +will be at first at such unexpected conduct in the child she has so +ill-treated, she will thank you in the end, Miss Grahame, depend upon +it." + +"If I thought so, Malison, on my honour, I should feel disinclined to +proceed one step further in the business. Give her cause to thank me, +feel that I have unwittingly been of service to her whom of her whole +sex I hate the most, to one who from my earliest years I know regarded +me with aversion and contempt; Malison, I would draw back on the instant +did I think so. But no, it will not, it shall not be; the life of her +child as Countess of Alphingham will not be such as to bring peace to +Mrs. Hamilton's heart: to some mothers it might, but not to hers. She +shall behold in this marriage the complete failure of her plans, the +utter wreck of all her exclusive notions; she shall see that her +pretended goodness and Christian example are not exemplified in Caroline +at least. She shall feel my power--aye, bitterly. Thus will I +triumph--in Caroline's disobedience will I be avenged for the contempt +and dislike her mother has ever shown to me." + +She suddenly raised her slight figure to its full height, and looked on +her companion with a countenance expressive of such malignant triumph, +that all, save her companion in iniquity, must have shuddered as they +beheld such youthful features so deformed. Some other conversation +passed between her and her able confidant, but as little more was said +on the subject most interesting to us, we will not follow them further. +Annie's evil schemes are already too clearly displayed; her mind unable, +as Miss Malison's, to comprehend the exalted nature of Mrs. Hamilton's +character, looked upon it with detestation; the more so, as feeling she +was ever _acting_--she believed it hypocrisy; that the worth for which +even those who visited her not gave her credit, was not her real +character, but an artful veil to conceal evil qualities. The quick +penetration of Miss Grahame had even in childhood discovered that she +was no favourite, and accustomed to be spoiled and flattered by all with +whom she associated, her indignation and dislike towards the only one +who would dare treat her differently, look on her as a mere child, +rendered ridiculous by affectation, increased with her years. She soon +discovered the influence she possessed over Caroline, and on that, +knowing also her faults, she determined to work, and thus effectually +destroy the peace of a mother devoted to her children, and prove to the +world that the eccentric seclusion of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton for their +children's benefit was productive of no more good, if as much as the +plain and in her eyes only useful plan of fashionable education. + +In her first scheme she had already succeeded more than she was perhaps +conscious. The affair of St. Eval had clearly and painfully proved to +Mr. Hamilton that the fears of his wife the night of Caroline's +introduction--those anxious fears, were indeed well founded. She had +sunk beneath temptation; integrity and honour, and every better feeling +had been overcome by that inordinate love of power which her mother from +the first had seen and dreaded. The father's heart was pained and +disappointed, not only in this, but that his Caroline now was not the +same as she had been at Oakwood. A change had come over her, and +darkening her spirit, rendered her conduct at home gloomy, distrustful, +and uneasy; the irritability of her childhood had returned, her very +conversation appeared restrained, and since the departure of Lord St. +Eval, her cheek had become pale, and her eye no longer sparkling; and +only in the excitement of society her parents beheld her as formerly. +Mr. Hamilton was deeply grieved, but he knew not, guessed not the extent +of his wife's anguish. She saw every foreboding fear fulfilled; the +confidence of her child was entirely withheld from her; the coldness +with which she felt compelled to treat her disregard of her wishes had, +she felt assured, completely alienated her affection. Caroline could no +longer love her; every week, every day proved, by a hundred minute +circumstances, her affection was fleeting, and her mother despairingly +felt, never to return; and yet she had but done her duty, exercised her +natural authority to lead her erring child in the better way. Her firm +unshrinking discipline in childhood had only bound the cords of +affection between herself and her offspring more firmly together; but +now in the case of Caroline it appeared about to snap them asunder. Her +fond heart yearned constantly towards her daughter, but she would not +give way, for the sake of Emmeline and Ellen, whose efforts vied with +each other to increase the comfort and happiness of her they so dearly +loved. Their affection, their confidence would not change--no, however +her authority might interfere with their wishes; and should she become +repining and gloomy, because there was one source of sorrow amidst so +many blessings? her pious heart struggled for submission, and obtained +it. But Caroline guessed not the deep pang she had inflicted; she knew +not the many tears shed in secret, the many inward prayers offered up +for her, that however severe was her chastening, it might be blessed, +and bring her back to the deserted fold, to the bosom of her mother. She +knew not this, nor was Annie conscious how fearfully her plans had +succeeded in inflicting pain. + +The very cheerfulness of Mrs. Hamilton, striven for as it was, the +unwavering kindness of her manner towards Emmeline and Ellen, increased +the irritability of Caroline, and with it her indignation at her +mother's coldness and severity towards herself. She felt she was indeed +a slave, and longed to throw aside that galling bondage. What right had +her mother to treat her thus? Why must her every action be controlled, +her very friendship disapproved of? She felt she was the injured one, +and therefore allowed herself no thought for her whom she in truth had +injured. For the same reason she clung yet closer to Annie; in her +alone, in her present state of mind, she found full sympathy, and yet +even with her she was not happy; there was a strange indefinable +sensation in her heart that even to her friend she could not express. +There was a void within, a deep yearning void, which tortured her in her +solitary moments, which even the society of Lord Alphingham could not +wholly remove. In solitude she blindly taught herself to believe that +void must be for him. How far she erred a future page must tell. + +Her conduct in society meanwhile, since the departure of St. Eval, had +been guarded and reserved, and her parents, fondly trusting their +displeasure had been of service, relaxed after the first fortnight in +their coldness and mistrustful manner towards her. Mrs. Hamilton had +hoped the pale cheek and dim eye proceeded from remorse; and had not +Caroline been so pointedly distant and reserved when in her society, she +would have lavished on her all the tenderness of former years. + +When that mysterious letter from Percy came, although it caused his +parents considerable anxiety, yet it never once occurred that any +coldness on their part towards Lord Alphingham could occasion Caroline +any pain. Percy wrote with a degree of eloquent earnestness that could +not be resisted, and guarded as his information and caution was, Mr. +Hamilton determined implicitly to abide by it. The young man wrote what +Annie had informed Miss Malison; that he had heard from more than one +quarter of Lord Alphingham's marked attentions to his sister, that he +had even been congratulated on the brilliant alliance Caroline was about +to make. He did not, he could not believe that such was the case, he +said, for he should then have heard it from his parents, but he conjured +his father, however casual the Viscount's attentions might be, to +withdraw Caroline entirely from them. + +"I know well," he wrote. "Father, as you value my sister's future peace, +expose her not to his many fascinations. If he has endeavoured to win +her heart, if he has paid her marked attentions, he is a villain! I dare +not be more explicit, I am pledged to silence, and only to you, my dear +father, and on such an emergency, am I privileged to write thus much. +Desire Caroline to give him no more encouragement, however slight; but +do not tell even this, it may not only alarm her, but be imparted +perhaps to her friend, as young ladies are fond of doing. You have once +said I never deceived you; father, trust me now, this is no jest; my +sister's happiness is too dear to me. Break off all connection with Lord +Alphingham. I give no credit to the rumours I have heard, for your +letters this season bade me hope Lord St. Eval would have been my +sister's choice. His departure from England has dispelled these visions; +but yet Caroline's affections cannot have been given to Lord Alphingham +without your or my mother's knowledge. Again I implore you, associate no +more with him, he is not worthy of my father's friendship." + +Mysterious as this was, yet both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton knew Percy too +well to imagine he would write thus without strong cause. The suspicions +and almost unconscious prejudice entertained towards him by Mrs. +Hamilton received confirmation by this letter, and she was pleased that +her husband determined no longer to encourage his intimacy. Percy wrote, +if he had paid Caroline marked attentions, or endeavoured to win her +heart, he was a villain, and he had done so, and Mrs. Hamilton could not +but feel sufficiently rejoiced at Caroline's apparent manner towards +him. Deceived as she had been, yet that her once honourable child should +so entirely forget the principles of her childhood, as to give him +secret encouragement, while her conduct in society rather bespoke +indifference and pride than pleasure, that Caroline could have been led +to act thus was a thing so morally impossible to Mrs. Hamilton, that she +had no hesitation whatever in complying with Percy's request, little +imagining that in doing so she placed an inseparable bar to her +regaining the confidence of her child, and widened more painfully the +breach between them. + +Caroline's heart, on receiving her father's command to withdraw herself +by degrees entirely from Lord Alphingham, was wrung with many bitter and +contending feelings. At first she reproached herself for having thus +completely concealed her feelings, and, had she followed the impulse of +nature, she would at once have thrown herself on her mother's neck, and +there confessed all, that she loved him; that she had long done so, and +implore her not to check their intercourse without some more explicit +reason: but Annie's evil influence had been too powerful. She dreaded +her reproaches on this want of confidence in herself, or what was still +worse, her satirical smile at her ridiculous weakness, and then she +remembered her mother's displeasure at her former conduct, and dreaded a +renewal of the same coldness, perhaps even increased control. She +determined, therefore, to wait till she had seen Annie; and that +interview rendered her more miserable, excited still more her +indignation against her parents and brother, and strengthened the +feelings of devoted affection with which she fancied she regarded Lord +Alphingham. Annie's continued notes confirmed these feelings; under the +specious intention of soothing Caroline's wounded pride, it was very +easy for her to disguise her repeated insinuations of Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton's injustice and caprice towards the Viscount, and tyranny +towards herself. The veil she had thrown over Caroline's sober judgment +became thicker and more blinding, and Caroline could sometimes scarcely +restrain even before her parents the indignation which so continually +filled her heart. + +Mrs. Hamilton was ignorant of the communications that were so constantly +passing between Annie and her daughter, or she might perhaps have put a +stop to them. Caroline's own maid, Fanny, had been persuaded to become +the means of receiving and sending their intelligence in secret. The +conscience of the girl reproached her more than once, but the idea was +so improbable that Miss Caroline could act improperly, that she +continued faithful to her wishes, even against her better judgment. + +Lord Alphingham's ready penetration was puzzled at the change of manner +in both Mr. Hamilton and his daughter. The latter, he could easily +perceive, was constrained to act thus, and his determination to release +her from such thraldom became more strongly fixed within him. He became +as cold and reserved to her father as Mr. Hamilton had been to him; but +his silent yet despairing glances ever turned towards Caroline, were, he +felt assured, quite enough to rivet his influence more closely around +her. The following morning, as Annie had expected, the Viscount sought +her to give vent to his fears about Caroline; his indignation against +the unaccountable alteration in Mr. Hamilton's manner. What could have +caused it? He had ever acted honourably and nobly, openly marked his +preference, and he had talked himself into a passion, before his +companion offered to give him any advice or speak any comfort. + +"They are either determined their daughter shall not marry whom she +likes, in revenge for her not accepting whom they selected, or they are +resolved, by this studied display of coldness, to bring you to a point, +so I advise you to speak to this stern capricious father at once." + +"And what good will that do?" + +"A great deal, if you manoeuvre properly, on which quality you +fortunately require no lessons from me. You will, at least, discover Mr. +Hamilton's intentions. If he receive you, well and good, you should be +flattered at his condescension; if the contrary, you will, at least, +know on what ground you stand, and the situation in which my poor friend +must be placed. She is worried to death with the continual caprices of +mamma and papa. It would be a charity in any one to break the chains in +which she is held. She came to me yesterday in the deepest distress, and +all from caprice; for what else can it be that has changed Mr. +Hamilton's manner?" + +Lord Alphingham's fancy became more and more warmed as she spoke; vanity +and self-love were alike gratified, and he answered eagerly-- + +"I may depend, then, on her affections; she will not, for fear of mamma, +play me false." + +"Not she; that is to say, if you do not betray her in your eagerness to +ask her of her father. You have never yet asked the question, though you +have discovered she loves you; but if, in demanding her of her father, +you say you have gained her affections, the consequence will be, if Mr. +Hamilton refuse her, she will be borne instantly to Oakwood, and there +imprisoned, till the poor girl pines and droops like a chained bird +without hope of freedom. Whereas, if you will only govern your impetuous +temper, and trust to her affections and my friendship, your every wish +may be gratified, with or without Mr. Hamilton's advice." + +"And you will assist us;--adorable girl! how can we ever repay you?" he +exclaimed, raising her hand passionately to his lips. The cheek of Annie +suddenly blanched, but a cold, proud smile curled her lip. She answered +him in his own spirit, and after a prolonged interview, the Viscount +departed to act on her advice. + +Ere that day closed, Lord Alphingham had sought, Mr. Hamilton, and with +every demonstration of respectful yet passionate affection, solicited +his consent to address his daughter. The warning of his son, the strong +term he had used, were engraved on Mr. Hamilton's mind, and scarcely +could he answer the Viscount with his accustomed calmness. Politely but +decidedly he refused, adding, that he had hoped the constant reserve of +Caroline's manner would at once have convinced him of her feelings, and +spared him the pain of refusing for her the honourable alliance Lord +Alphingham proposed. A haughty and somewhat triumphant smile played for +a second on the Viscount's lips, but Mr. Hamilton understood not its +import; and his companion, with many expressions of wounded feeling and +injured honour, departed, leaving Mr. Hamilton rather pleased than +otherwise at this affair, as it gave him a plausible excuse for +withdrawing entirely from his society. He imparted what had passed to +his wife, and both agreed it was better for Caroline to say nothing of +his proposals; and this determination, for once, was not thwarted by +Annie, who thought it better for Lord Alphingham to plead his own cause +at some future time when the idea of his having been refused without +consulting her, the person principally concerned, would excite yet +greater indignation toward her parents, and assist effectually the cause +of her lover, who, leaving town for a week or two to prove to Mr. +Hamilton his wounded feelings were no pretence, or for some other +reason, left to Annie the charge of preparing Caroline's mind for the +alternative he might propose. + +A circumstance happened about this time, which appeared greatly to +favour the schemes of Annie and Lord Alphingham, and expose Caroline +more powerfully to temptation. The Duchess of Rothbury had invited a +select number of friends to while away the remaining weeks of the London +season at her elegant seat, which was situated in a lovely spot, about +twenty miles from the metropolis. Amongst the number she, of course, +included Mrs. Hamilton, and expressed herself very much disappointed +when that lady tendered excuses. Mr. Hamilton could not leave town; he +had put Mr. Myrvin's case into the hands of an able solicitor, and +wished to remain on the spot himself to urge on the business, that it +might be completed before he returned to Oakwood. It was not likely, he +said, that the affair would occupy much time, the whole circumstance +being directly illegal. It had only been the age and poverty, combined +with the shrinking sensitiveness from public gaze, which had prevented +Mr. Myrvin from coming forward at the very first against his persecutor. +A specious tale had been brought forward to excuse the illegality, and +impose on the bishop in whose diocese Llangwillan was situated, and +Myrvin, though he could meet trials with resignation, was too +broken-hearted to resist them. Thus much Mr. Hamilton had learned from +Arthur, to whom he wrote himself, requesting him to give a minute +account of the whole circumstance. His earnestness, seconded by the +entreaties of both his sons, succeeded in banishing Arthur's proud +reserve, and Mr. Hamilton was now engaged heart and soul in his +benevolent scheme of exposing iniquity, and restoring the injured +clergyman to his grieving flock. He could not, therefore, leave London, +and Mrs. Hamilton who, for mere amusement, could not bear to part from +her children, for only Caroline was to accompany her, steadily resisted +the entreaties of her friend. For herself she was firm, but she +hesitated when the Duchess, seconded by her daughters, requested most +persuadingly, that if she would not come herself, she would, at least, +permit Caroline to join them. + +"You have known me so long, that I have the vanity to believe, that if I +promise to guard your child as if she were my own, you will trust her +with me," her grace urged, with a pertinacity that could not fail to be +flattering. "She will be as safe under my care as were she under the +observance of her mother." + +"That I do not doubt one moment," replied Mrs. Hamilton, earnestly; "if +I hesitated, it was from no doubt of either your grace's care or +kindness. If Caroline be willing to accept your invitation, and her +father consent, she has my permission." + +"Thank you, my good friend; I trusted in my eloquence to prevail," the +Duchess said, smiling with an air of sincerity that gratified Mrs. +Hamilton; and she quickly imparted to Caroline the accepted invitation, +but in vain endeavoured to read on the face of her child whether she +were pleased or otherwise. Circumstances which caused Mrs. Hamilton +rather to rejoice at Caroline's absence from London for a time, were to +the latter great preventives to the enjoyment to which, in such elegant +society, she might otherwise have looked forward. Annie Grahame was, +much to her own vexation, excluded from this select circle. The Duchess +had penetrated her designing character, and regarded her with a +prejudice, as violent as was her nature. She was only invited to those +large assemblies which included all her acquaintances, not merely her +friends. Amazed at this slight, Miss Grahame at once determined that +there the catastrophe for which she had so long planned should take +place, and her detestation of Mrs. Hamilton be gratified to the +uttermost. + +Would Lord Alphingham be there, was a question that crossed Caroline's +mind repeatedly, and was as often demanded of her friend. Annie either +would not or could not tell; and she would add, perhaps she ought to +congratulate Caroline on her separation from him, as such a dread +mandate had gone from her parent, and she surely would not wish to +encourage his society; and then she would implore her forgiveness, and +sympathise so well in her fancied distress, and describe that of Lord +Alphingham in such heightened colours, that Caroline, unsophisticated as +in some things she still was, felt truly miserable. The Viscount's +sudden departure from town would have been unaccountable, had not Annie +succeeded in persuading her that she was sure it was entirely owing to +her (Caroline's) coldness and Mr. Hamilton's unaccountable conduct. + +Mr. Hamilton did not at first approve of his daughter leaving home +without her mother, even to visit the Duchess of Rothbury, but he +yielded to the solicitations of his wife. They knew that Lord Alphingham +was somewhat of a favourite with the Duke, but felt so assured that the +heart of their child was entirely disengaged, at least to him, that on +his account they did not hesitate. Caroline's conduct with regard to St. +Eval had, they were convinced, proceeded from the pure love of coquetry; +they could not believe she had rejected him because she fancied she +loved another, they had had no cause to do so: and since Mrs. Hamilton +had spoken so seriously on the subject, Caroline's behaviour in public +had been such as to excite their approbation, and renew, in some +measure, their confidence in her integrity. She was more reserved, and +her manner to the Viscount, when they chanced to meet, had led them +trustingly to believe their commands on this head would be implicitly +obeyed. Perhaps Mrs. Hamilton's penetration had played her false; it was +strange that a mother so long accustomed to divine the thoughts and +feelings of her children, should have been thus blind to the emotions +with which Caroline believed she regarded Lord Alphingham. But, surely, +no farther proof than this was wanting to clearly demonstrate it was not +true love she felt; had it been that real, pure, fervid passion, could +one so unused to art have concealed the flushing cheek, the sparkling +eye, the trembling voice, which would invariably have betrayed her? No; +it was infatuation,--blind, maddening infatuation,--strengthened by +indignation towards her parents; by the wish to prove she could throw +off their control, and choose for herself, and love whom and where and +how she liked, without their choice and sympathy; and it was thus she +completely veiled her feelings. Can we condemn her mother for refusing +to believe the child she had trained and watched, and prayed for so +long, such an adept in deceit? Can we blame her want of penetration in +this instance, and think it unnatural in her character, when we remember +how completely the character of her child was changed? Surely not. It +would have been stranger had she, without proof, believed Caroline the +girl she had really become. + +The reflection that she could still write to Annie and hear from her, +consoled her for the temporary separation; and she joined the Duchess +with some degree of pleasure, which had, however, been slightly alloyed +by a conversation with her mother before she left home. Her spirit was +in too excitable a state to hear advice calmly. Every word Mrs. Hamilton +so gently said on her conduct being more guarded now than when under her +eye, her mild entreaties that for her sake Caroline would behave with +reserve, all fell on a poisoned ear. Sullenly she listened, and when her +mother bade her farewell, it was with a heart grieving bitterly. While +smarting under supposed injuries, how little did Caroline imagine the +real agony she inflicted on her mother. If the gentle heart of Mrs. +Hamilton had been wrung by the wayward conduct of her sister, how much +more so must it have been wounded, when she saw so many of those evil +qualities reflected in her child. + +At Airslie, so the residence of the Duchess of Rothbury was called, +Caroline found herself universally courted. She knew she was admired, +and she was flattered; but there was a ceaseless gnawing at her heart, +which not even gratified vanity could still. She knew not, would not +know, it was remorse. She believed it was the conduct of her parents; +the chain that was thrown round her actions, her disappointment with +regard to Lord Alphingham; for he was not, as in secret she hoped, he +would be, one of the invited guests. It was a task, a painful task, to +write home, but she forced herself to speak of the scenes around, and +sketch, with a masterly hand, some of the characters with whom she +mingled; and her parents strove to be satisfied, though there was +somewhat wanting in those letters which, when Caroline had been from +home, they had never missed before. + +"So that man of learning, that marvellous prodigy, that walking +cyclopaedia, Lord St. Eval, has absolutely deserted us, to bury himself +in Italy or Switzerland. Miss Hamilton, can you explain so wonderful and +puzzling an enigma?" mischievously demanded Lord Henry D'Este, one day, +as he found himself alone near Caroline. His friend's departure had +indeed been to him a riddle, and believing at length that it must have +originated in her caprice, he determined, whenever he had an +opportunity, to revenge St. Eval by doing all in his power to torment +her. A deep blush overspread Caroline's cheeks as he spoke, for except +that Mary Greville's letters had mentioned him, he was never spoken of +at home. + +"It ought not to appear a very puzzling riddle to you," she answered +quickly. "He has gone, I should imagine, to collect fresh matters for +reflection, that he may better deserve the title you have bestowed upon +him." + +"Nay, nay, surely he has enough of such matters to form four and twenty +good folio volumes," answered Lord Henry, laughing. "The art of +politeness he certainly has failed to retain, for you can have no idea +what a _brusque_ philosopher he is. I assure you, he terrified me the +last time I saw him. What your honourable father had done to him I know +not, but I met him just coming from Berkeley Square, and all the charms +he had lately invited around him had suddenly departed, he was a +different man, and that day, in a fit, I suppose, of spleen, he quits +London, and the next time I hear of him he is in Geneva: that noble Lord +is one of the strangest creatures I ever had the honour to know. +However, perhaps he has visited the Continent to learn politeness, and I +think he may chance to learn a lesson of love also. Not at all unlikely, +by the praises he bestows in his letters on a certain Louisa Manvers." + +In vain Caroline struggled to prevent a start, or her cheek from +suddenly paling. "Louisa Manvers," she repeated, almost unconsciously. + +"Yes, do you know her? by the bye, she must be some distant connection +of yours, I fancy; her brother is Lord Delmont, he inherited the title +from your maternal grandfather. St. Eval and Delmont were college chums, +and, though they are parted, retain all the romantic enthusiasm of +friendship. After spending some little time with your friends I believe, +at Geneva, the lone pilgrim bent his steps to Lago Guardia, and there he +has remained, wooing nature with his friend, and in all probability +playing the _dĂ©vouĂ©_ to Miss Manvers. We shall find Lord St. Eval +bringing home a fair Italian bride, before we are aware of it; that is +to say, if she will have the courage to pore through the deep and hidden +treasures of this volume, till she comes to the magic word heart." + +He might have continued, for Caroline, buried in her own miserable +thoughts, interrupted him not. Had she encountered the eyes of Lord +Henry, as they were fixed full of mischief upon her, she might have made +some effort to rouse herself, but as it was, she felt relieved and glad +when their _tĂªte-Ă -tĂªte_ was interrupted by the entrance of a merry +group, just returned in the highest spirits from exploring a thick and +mazy wood in the vicinity of the extensive grounds. + +"Good news for you all," exclaimed the Duke of Rothbury, entering +directly after; "we are to have another guest to-day, to keep us all +alive." + +"Who--who?" was reiterated by many voices, with somewhat of the noisy +mirth of children. + +"No less a person than Viscount Alphingham." An exclamation of pleasure +passed through the giddy crowd, but there was an expression in the +countenance of the Duchess, who had also entered from a drive, which, to +Caroline's quickly awakened fancy, appeared contrary to the general +emotion. "He is engaged as Sir Walter Courtenay's guest, so I cannot +claim him as mine," the Duke continued; "but that does not much signify. +Sir Walter is here every day, and Alphingham will of course accompany +him. He is the best fellow I know." + +"And this is the man papa, for no reason whatever, save from Percy's +ill-natured opinion, has desired me to slight, to behave in a manner +that, contrasted with former notice, must be madness itself; cruelty to +him, after what has passed between us, and misery to me. Surely, in such +a case as this I am not compelled to obey. When the general voice +proclaims him other than they believe, am I to regard what is in itself +a mystery? If Percy had good reasons for writing against him to papa, +for I am sure he must have done so, why did he not explain them, instead +of treating me thus like a child, and standing forward as his accuser, +when the whole world extols him? Why are the dearest wishes of my heart +to be destroyed merely by caprice? Percy ever tried, even in childhood, +to bid me to look up to him, and acknowledge his power, and thus he +would prove it; but he will find himself mistaken. When papa permits his +judgment to be blinded by the insinuations of a mere boy, I no longer +consider myself bound to obey him." + +Such was the tenor of Caroline's thoughts when alone, in the short +interval, ere she descended to dinner--there was no ray of happiness; +her heart had that day received a wound, nor could she derive comfort +even from the knowledge that Lord Alphingham was expected. She would not +permit herself to think on Lord Henry's conversation. What was it to her +if St. Eval married Louisa Manvers? then studiously she thought only on +the Viscount, and the situation with regard to him in which she was +placed, till her head ached with the intensity of its reflections. + +On entering the drawing-room she found, as she had anticipated, Lord +Alphingham the centre of a brilliant coterie, and for the space of a +minute her heart throbbed and her cheek flushed. He bowed respectfully +as she appeared, but with distant courtesy; yet she fancied the flow of +his eloquence was for a moment arrested, and his glance, subdued yet so +mournfully beseeching, spoke volumes. Neither at dinner nor during the +whole of that evening did he pay her more than ordinary attention; +scarcely that. But those silent signals of intelligence had even greater +power than words; for they nattered her self-love, by clearly proving, +that courted, admired, as he could not but feel he was by all around +him, his noble hostess perhaps excepted, yet all was as nothing, now +that her favour had been so strangely and suddenly withdrawn. His tone, +his manner, as he presented to her a note from Annie, of which he had +been the bearer, strengthened this illusion; and Caroline, as she +retired to rest, felt more and more convinced they were indeed mutually +and devotedly attached, and that her obedience to her parents could not +weigh against the duty she owed herself, the love he had evinced for +her. Annie's note strengthened this determination. + +"I give you joy, my dear Caroline," she wrote, "on the opportunity you +will now enjoy of receiving Lord Alphingham's attentions, undisturbed by +any of those wayward fancies which have lately so destroyed your peace. +Do not, for heaven's sake, by squeamish notions of filial obedience and +dutiful conduct--which I do assure you have been very long out of +date--destroy your own happiness. When parents cease to care for the +true welfare and felicity of their children, it becomes our positive +duty to care for them ourselves. Mr. Hamilton has given you no reason +for his command to withdraw yourself from the attentions of Lord +Alphingham; and surely that is the clearest imaginable proof that he +really has none to give, and that it is merely to gratify his own unjust +displeasure at your rejection of St. Eval, as if in such matters you had +not an undoubted right to decide for yourself. He cannot suppose that +you will now be contented with that which completely crosses your own +wishes, merely because he desires it. That was all very well in your +childhood, but at present, when your own reason must be satisfied, he +has no right to expect obedience. The whole conduct of your parents, you +have owned to me yourself, has been lately such as to alienate your +affection and confidence. They hold your will enchained, my poor friend; +and if you have not the spirit to break it, now a fair opportunity +occurs, forgive me, if I say I can no longer offer you consolation. Lord +Alphingham loves you, and long ere this, had it not been for your +mother's extraordinary conduct, would have proposed, and you might have +been now a plighted bride, or still happier wife. I much doubt, by a +few hints he dropped, if his late departure from town was not occasioned +by Mr. Hamilton's positive refusal to sanction his addresses to you. If +he has demanded your hand, and been rejected without your knowledge, +your father and mother have treated you with much confidence and +affection, have they not? Can they, dare they expect to receive yours, +when such is the case? Is it not a clear proof your happiness is not to +be consulted in any marriage you may form? It is ridiculous to imagine +that your mother has penetrated, in some degree, your feelings for +Alphingham, though perhaps not to their extent; and not approving of it, +for no reason whatever, she desires you to shun his society. Your father +refuses a most honourable offer, without even consulting the person +principally concerned. Caroline, my dearest friend, do not permit your +noble spirit to be thus bowed down. Whatever alternative Lord Alphingham +may propose becomes lawful, when you are thus cruelly persecuted. Many +secret marriages are happier, very much happier, than those for which +the consent of parents have been obtained. They think only of ambition, +interest; how can we expect them to enter into the warmth of youthful +feelings? Do not be frightened at my words, but give them a calm, just +deliberation. You have permitted your love for him to be discovered; it +becomes your duty to prove it still more clearly." + +Such were the principal contents of Annie's letter, more than sufficient +to confirm Caroline's already half-adopted resolution, and convince her +wavering judgment that obedience to her parents was now no longer a +duty; their unjust harshness had alienated her from them, and she must +stand forth and act alone. Conscience loudly called on her to desist; +that she was deserting the plain path, and entering the labyrinth of +deceit, but the words of Annie were before her. Again and again they +were read, till every word became engraved within her, and the spirit +they breathed thickened the film before her eyes, and deafened her ear +to every loudly-whispered reproach. Yet in silence and solitude that +still small voice, conscience, arose and left its pang, although on the +instant banished. + +A few days passed, and the conduct of the Viscount to Caroline continued +the same as it had been the first night. Publicly distant, secretly and +silently beseeching, with an eloquence few could have resisted. There +was a grand _fĂªte_ and _dĂ©jeĂ»ner_ at Airslie, which was pronounced by +the connoisseurs in such things to be the most _recherchĂ©_ of the +season. But few, comparatively speaking, were the guests, though some +had ventured to travel twenty miles for the purpose; yet all was +elegant. The day was lovely, and with the bright sunshine and cloudless +sky, added new charms to this fairy land; for so, by the tasteful +arrangement of gorgeous tents, sparkling fountains, exotic shrubs, and +flowers of every form and shade, the _coup d'oeil_ might have been +termed. Musicians were stationed in various parts of the grounds. The +dance was enjoyed with spirit on the greensward, when the heat of the +sun had subsided into the advancing twilight, and the picturesque +groups, the chaste and elegant costumes scattered about, intermixed with +the beauties of inanimate nature, added life and spirit to the picture. + +It was an exciting and yet a soothing scene. Some minds, untouched by +care, would here have revelled in unchecked gladness. In others, it +might have been productive of that soothing melancholy, which, from its +very sweetness, we encourage till it becomes pain: such was the case +with Caroline. Her spirits, buoyed up at first with the hope and +expectation that here at least Lord Alphingham might resume his +attentions unremarked, she had been excited to unwonted gaiety; but as +the hours wore on, and he approached her not, that excitement faded into +melancholy and doubt. Not even had the usual signals of intelligence +passed between them, for he had been sedulously devoting himself to +almost every beautiful girl in the gardens. Jealousy for a moment took +possession of her mind, but that very quickly gave way to indignation +against her father. + +"If he has been treated as Annie tells me, if his proposals for me have +been rejected," she thought, "how can I expect or hope that he will +continue his addresses? He knows not but that I have been consulted, and +is my happiness to be overthrown, rudely cast aside, by the insinuations +of a boy?" and covering her face with her hands, she burst into tears: +the scene, the time, the faint sound of the distant music, encouraged +these feelings, and heightened despondency. Day was darkening around +her, aided by the sombre shade of the gigantic trees, which formed a +grove where she sat, and the music borne along at intervals sounded +unusually mournful. A heavy sigh near her aroused her from her painful +trance, and starting, she beheld the object of her thoughts standing by +her side. His speaking eyes were fixed on her with a glance not the most +obtuse imagination could have misinterpreted, and the whole expression +of his peculiarly handsome features betrayed the most eloquent and +pleading sympathy. + +"Oh, that it might be mine, the blessed privilege of endeavouring to +soothe or to relieve this grief!" he passionately exclaimed, as with an +air of the utmost respect he ventured to take her hand. "I had indulged +in presumptuous hopes. I had ventured to read the flattering notice +which I ever received from you as a confirmation of my wishes, and I +indulged in fondly-cherished visions that ere this I should indeed have +had a right, a holy right, to soothe your every grief and share in every +joy. I thought wrong; your flattering notice must have been but the +impulse of your kind heart, pitying what you could not fail to behold; +and yet, oh, Miss Hamilton, that very demonstration of your gentle +nature has increased my misery; it has bade me love, nay, adore you. I +blame you not. I have been presumptuous--mad. I had no right to expect +so much happiness. My proposals were refused. I was told your conduct +must have made it evident that I was not pleasing to you. I fled from +your presence, but I could not rest alone. Again, like a mad fool, I +have plunged myself in the centre of fascination. I could not exist +without the sound of your voice, though me it might never more address. +I could not live without glancing on your expressive eyes, your eloquent +smile, though on me neither more might beam. I am here, I feel my folly, +but I cannot tear myself away. Caroline, adorable Caroline!" he +continued, with well-practised passion, "only speak, command me; in what +way can I relieve the grief in which I see you plunged? Give me at least +the gratification of feeling I have been of service to you; that I have +done somewhat for your happiness, though by you mine has fled for ever." + +Rapidly yet eloquently had he spoken, and Caroline vainly struggled +with herself to interrupt him. He believed she had rejected him, and in +that moment she contrasted his present conduct with that of Lord St. +Eval, under the same circumstances, and surely she could doubt no longer +which loved her best. She had not seen the secret agony of the one--his +proud and noble heart concealed it; but Alphingham--when such devoted +love was offered her, would she condemn it to misery, and herself to +everlasting reproach, if not to equal woe? + +"You are mistaken, my lord," she said, proudly, after a severe struggle +with herself. "Lay not to my charge the loss of your happiness. I was +not aware till this instant that it depended--" She stopped abruptly, +for the natural modesty of her disposition prevented more, indignant as +she was at the confirmation of Annie's suspicions. + +Lord Alphingham saw his advantage, and pursued it. + +"How!" he exclaimed, in an accent of astonishment and ecstasy well +combined. "Have you too been deceived, and my proposals rejected without +having been laid before you? Can it be possible? Oh, speak again, my +beloved Caroline! tell me I have not been too presuming--that I may hope +that my long-cherished visions are not false. You will not, oh, you will +not condemn me to misery--you will not reject my heart, and send me +despairing from your feet. Caroline, my beloved, my beautiful! say that +you will be merciful--say that you love me--that I love not alone; oh, +say, promise me you will be mine, and come what will we shall be happy." + +She heard, and her heart throbbed and her brain reeled; in the +infatuation of that moment, all, all was forgotten, save the persuasions +of Annie, his pleading eloquence, the wild impulse of her own blinded +fancy; the fatal promise passed her lips--she was pledged to be his own. +A few minutes she listened to his impassioned thanks, his words of +devoted love, then suddenly starting back-- + +"My father!" she exclaimed, and burst into a passionate flood of tears. + +"Nay, weep not, my beloved, my own! let not a mere shadow, for such in +this instance is duty, alloy the felicity that will be ours. His consent +will in time be given; fear not, when he sees you happy, when he sees my +only care, my every thought is for your welfare, that his forgiveness +for involuntary disobedience will be granted, and his unjust and cruel +prejudices against me will pass away, for he will find they were indeed +but fancy; and if he continues obdurate, oh, how rejoiced I shall be to +have withdrawn my Caroline from his stern guardianship. Already has he +deceived you; and can he then expect implicit obedience to unjust and +unfounded commands on your part? Cheer up, my best love, fear not; trust +to my affection, and all will be well." + +But still she wept, even though Lord Alphingham continued this strain of +consolation for some little time longer. Fearing at length to attract +notice by her prolonged absence, she roused herself, and breaking from +her triumphant lover, remained for a few minutes alone, endeavouring, +but vainly, to recover that happiness which, when she had looked to an +union with the Viscount, had promised to dawn around her. She saw it +not; there was a dark, heavy, threatening cloud overhanging her mind, +which no efforts could dispel. She felt, as she rejoined the glittering +circle, the eye of the Duchess was fixed with startling earnestness upon +her, and she shrunk from that severe look, as if indeed it could +penetrate her soul and condemn the past. Why did not enjoyment return? +Why was she not happy when in the centre of a scene like this? She knew +not, and struggled to be gay and animated as usual; but she felt as if +each effort failed, and drew upon her the attention of those near her, +and rejoiced was she indeed when the festive hours had fled, and she was +alone. She strove to compose her troubled thoughts to prayer, but no +words came to her aid, and throwing herself on her bed, she wept for +many weary hours. She could not have told why she thus wept; she only +knew that she was wretched, that the light-heartedness once so +peculiarly her own had fled, it seemed, for ever, and she shrunk almost +in loathing from the hour when she should meet Lord Alphingham again; +and when it came, even his presence cheered her not. He soothed, even +gently reproached, but as he did so there was somewhat in his eye she +had never seen before, and which struck terror. Subdued as it was it +told of passions from which she had believed him exempt, and added +additional pain to her distress. Noticing what she termed the +indisposition of her young friend, the Duchess kindly advised her to +remain quiet, nor join the gay party, till it had passed away; but as +she spoke, Caroline observed the severe and scrutinizing glance of the +Duchess again fixed upon her, and, contrary to her advice, appeared as +usual at dinner. + +Days passed, and Lord Alphingham's plan was matured, and submitted to +Caroline's sanction. A _fĂªte_, similar to that given by the Duchess, +only commencing at a later hour, to permit a superb display of fireworks +on the grounds, was to be given by a neighbouring nobleman, to which all +the members of the Duchess's party were invited. The villa was some few +miles off, and they were to leave Airslie at half-past eight. That day +Caroline was to feign indisposition, and remain undisturbed at home; at +ten Lord Alphingham would dispatch a trusty servant, well disguised, +with a note, apparently from Mrs. Hamilton, requesting her daughter's +immediate return, as she had been taken suddenly and dangerously ill. +This note was, of course, designed to impose upon any member of the +party who might, by some mischance, remain at home, and be circulated +among the servants to account for her sudden departure. The carriage, +said to be Mr. Hamilton's, waited for her; Lord Alphingham was to meet +it at some five miles off; but once within it, once safe from Airslie, +the rest was easy. + +Caroline heard, and an inward shuddering crept chilly through her frame. +Faintly and briefly she agreed to all he so eloquently and persuasively +pleaded, and instantly left him. + +"Will she be weak enough now to waver?" thought Alphingham. "Perhaps, +after all, she is not worthy of all this trouble, there is no spirit in +her; yet she is so beautiful, it will suit me well to introduce such a +lovely creature as my bride next season, and gratify my vengeance on Mr. +Hamilton for his unceremonious refusal, and if I get tired of her, if +then tears and pale cheeks continue, why, thank heaven, no chains with +me are binding. That early folly of mine was not so useless as it +seemed; I may act as I please, and if your daughter sickens or offends +me, Mr. Hamilton, as you have done, you may well dread my vengeance, it +will fall upon you both, and I unscathed will seek other lands and +fairer beauties, as I have already done." His countenance had darkened +during this speech, but at its close it became clear again, and, with a +careless whistle of unconcern, he sauntered away. + +And was it to this man that the cherished child of so much anxiety was +about to sacrifice herself--with him and for him, she, who had once been +the soul of truth and honour, had consented to leave the guardianship of +her father, and break the sacred links of nature? Alas! though her very +spirit now revolted, she had gone too far. How could she, how dared she +draw back? and yet one effort she would make. She would implore him to +permit her to confess all to her parents; she was convinced, did they +know how much her happiness depended on her union with him, they would +consent, and with their blessing hallow their marriage. +Happiness--Caroline shuddered; the wild excitement of secret love had +departed. She knew she was beloved, she had given her promise, yet she +was not happy; and could she then expect to be when irrevocably his own? +Her brain reeled beneath the bewildering chaos of her thoughts; but she +followed up her resolution, and implored him as she had intended. Lord +Alphingham heard with a dark and frowning brow. + +"And what becomes of your kind brother's just accusations?" demanded the +Viscount, with a very evident and contemptuous sneer. + +"Defend yourself, and papa will be convinced they are unfounded," was +her reply. But she gazed on his countenance, and terrified at its +expression, for the first time the thought flashed across her mind, +could there indeed be any real cause for Percy's warning; and more and +more earnestly did she beseech him to say she might implore her father's +sanction. "Only let me confide in papa and mamma, let me try and +convince them they are mistaken, and Percy too must be in error." + +The Viscount for some little time endeavoured mildly to confute her +arguments, and convince her that in doing so, she was only forming her +own misery; but still she pleaded, and ungoverned fury at length burst +forth. He had been too long the victim of passions always to keep them +in bounds, even when most required; and for a few minutes they spurned +restraint, and Caroline beheld him as he was, and saw in dim perspective +the blackened future. She would have broken from him, but he detained +her, and with a rapid transition of mood humbled himself before her, and +with impassioned fervour and deep contrition besought her forgiveness, +her pity. It was his fervid love, his fear of losing her, that bade him +thus forget himself, and he conjured her not to condemn him to +everlasting misery; that he was wretched enough already at having caused +her one moment's pain. He spoke, and his softened voice, his imploring +eyes, his protestations of unalterable love and gratitude, if she would +but trust to his affections, and be his own as he proposed, had in a +degree their effect. She was convinced it would only bring forth misery +now to implore the sanction and blessing of her parents, and promised to +resign all idea of so doing. But vainly she strove to forget that burst +of ungoverned passion she had witnessed; it haunted her sleeping and +waking thoughts, and his protestations of devoted love were dimmed +beside it, they shared its blackened hue. + +The appointed day came, and the Duchess, without question or remark, +accepted Caroline's excuse for not accompanying her and her friends to +the expected _fĂªte_. The heavy eyes and pale cheeks of the misguided +girl were more than sufficient excuse; she even seconded Caroline in +refusing the kind offer of Lady Annie and Lady Lucy Melville to remain +with her. She said she preferred being quite alone, as she was no +companion for any one, and it appeared as if not even that obstacle +would arise to prevent her flight. + +The hours wore on; the noble guests could speak of nothing but the +anticipated _fĂªte_ and its attendant pleasures, while they whiled away +the intervening hours in the library, the music-room, the garden, +wherever their taste dictated, for freedom was ever the password of +Airslie; but Caroline joined them not. It was the second day that she +had not seen the Viscount; for, fearing to attract notice, he had never +made his visits unusually frequent, and well versed in intrigue, he had +carried on his intercourse with Caroline in impenetrable secrecy. More +than once in those lonely hours did she feel as if her brain reeled, and +become confused, for she could not banish thought. She had that morning +received letters from home, and in her present mood each line breathed +affection, which her now awakened conscience told her was undeserved. +Nature and reason had resumed their sway, as if to add their tortures to +the anguish of those hours. The misery which had been her portion, since +her acceptance of Lord Alphingham, had slowly but surely drawn the +blinding film from her eyes. The light of reason had broke upon them +with a lustre that would no more be darkened. At the same moment that +she knew she did not love Lord Alphingham, her conduct to her parents, +to St. Eval, appeared in their true colours. Yes! this was no fancy, she +had been the victim of infatuation, of excitement; but clearer and +clearer dawned the truth. She was sacrificing herself to one whom she +did not love, whom she had never loved, with whom her life would be a +dreary waste; and for this was she about to break the ties of nature, +fly from her parents, perhaps draw down upon her head their curse, or, +what she now felt would be worse, much worse, wring that mother's heart +with anguish, whose conduct, now that reason had resumed her throne, she +was convinced had been ever guided by the dictates of affection. She +recalled with vivid clearness her every interview with Annie, and she +saw with bitter self-reproach her own blindness and folly, in thus +sacrificing her own judgment to false reasoning, in withdrawing her +confidence and affection from the mother who had never once deceived +her, to bestow them on one who had played upon her foolish weakness, +heightened her scarcely-dawning fancy till it became infatuation, and +finally recommended that plan of conduct from which Caroline's whole +soul revolted. Why had she done this? Caroline felt, to bring down shame +upon her head and suffering on her mother. Her parents' conduct changed +towards her--oh! had not hers changed to them? had she not acted from +the first of Annie's arrival in London as if under the influence of some +spell? and now that it was rudely broken, recollections of the past +mingled with and heightened her present sufferings. Her childhood, her +early youth rushed like a torrent on her mind; faulty as they had been, +they were innocent and pure compared with her present self. Then she +had been ever actuated by truth, candour, respectful love, affectionate +confidence towards her parents; now all had been cast aside. If her +mother's words were true, and bitterly she felt they were, that her +conduct to St. Eval had been one continued falsehood, what would her +parents feel when her intercourse with Lord Alphingham was discovered. +Lord Alphingham--she shuddered as his name rose to her lips. Her heart +yearned with passionate intensity towards her mother, to hear her voice +in blessing, to see her beaming smile, and feel her kiss of approbation, +such as at Oakwood she had so often received: she longed in utter +wretchedness for them. That night she was wilfully to cast them off for +ever, flee as a criminal from all she loved; and if she could return +home, confess all, would that confiding love ever be hers again? She +shrunk in trembling terror from her father's sternness, her mother's +look of woe, struggling with severity, the coldness, the displeasure she +would excite--on all sides she beheld but misery; but to fly with Lord +Alphingham, to bind herself for ever with one, whom every passing hour +told her she did not, could not love--oh, all, all, even death itself, +were preferable to that! The words of her brother sounded incessantly in +her ears: "If you value my sister's future peace, let her be withdrawn +from his society." How did she know that those words were wholly without +foundation? the countenance of the Viscount as he had alluded to them +confirmed them to her now awakened eye. Was she about to wed herself to +crime? She remembered the perfect justness, the unwavering charity of +her father, and in those softened moments she felt assured he would not +have condemned him without good cause. Why, oh, why had she thus +committed herself? where was she to turn for succour? where look for aid +to guard her from the fate she had woven for herself? Where, in her +childish faults, had her mother taught her to seek for assistance and +forgiveness? Dare she address her Maker, the God whom, in those months +of infatuated blindness, she had deserted; Him, whom her deception +towards her parents had offended, for she had trampled on His holy laws, +she had honoured them not? + +The hour of seven chimed; three hours more, and her fate was irrevocably +sealed--the God of her youth profaned; for could she ever address Him +again when the wife of Alphingham? from whose lips no word of religion +ever came, whose most simple action had lately evinced contempt for its +forms and restrictions. The beloved guardians of her infant years, the +tender friends of her youth insulted, lowered by her conduct in the +estimation of the world, liable to reproach; their very devotion for so +many years to their children condemned, ridiculed. An inseparable bar +placed between her and the hand-in-hand companions of her youth; never +again should she kneel with them around their parents, and with them +share the fond impressive blessing. Oakwood and its attendant innocence +and joys, had they passed away for ever? She thought on the anguish that +had been her mother's, when in her childhood she had sinned, and what +was she now about to inflict? She saw her bowed down in the depth of +misery; she heard her agonized prayer for mercy on her child. + +"Saviour of my mother, for her sake, have mercy on her unworthy child! +oh, save me from myself, restore me to my mother!" and sinking on her +knees, the wretched girl buried her face in her hands, and minutes, +which to her appeared like hours, rolled on in that wild burst of +repentant and remorseful agony. + + + + +CHAPTER VII. + + +"Dearest mother, this is indeed like some of Oakwood's happy hours," +exclaimed Emmeline, that same evening, as with childish glee she had +placed herself at her mother's feet, and raised her laughing eyes to her +face, with an expression of fond confiding love. + +She and Ellen were sitting alone with Mrs. Hamilton, Miss Harcourt being +engaged at a friend's, and Mr. Hamilton having been summoned after +dinner to a private interview with his solicitor on the Myrvin affairs. + +The lovely evening was slowly wearing on to twilight, and the sky, +shadowed as it was by the towering mansions of Berkeley Square, yet bore +all the rich hues which had attended the repose of a brilliant setting +sun. The balcony of the drawing-room where they were sitting was filled +with, flowers, and the window being thrown widely open, the gentle +breeze of summer filled the room with their sweet fragrance. It was that +hour of evening when even London is somewhat hushed. Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton had been more at home since Caroline's visit to Airslie, but +yet not one evening had so vividly reminded Emmeline of her dear Oakwood +as the present; it was thus in twilight she had often sought her mother, +and given vent, by a thousand little innocent devices, to the warm +emotions that filled her heart. + +Ellen had been standing by the flowers, but on hearing her cousin's +exclamation, she too had established herself on the couch by her aunt, +and added-- + +"You are right, dear Emmeline; it is indeed." + +There was an anxiety on Mrs. Hamilton's heart, which she could not +define; but was yet unable to resist the innocent happiness of her young +companions, and twining her arm playfully round Ellen, she abandoned her +other hand to Emmeline, and answered-- + +"I am very glad, my dear children, that such a simple thing as my +company can afford you so much pleasure." + +"It is so very rare now to have you thus all alone, mamma, can it be +otherwise than delight? I do not even want papa yet, we three make such +a comfortable party." + +"You are exceedingly polite to my uncle, Emmeline. I have a good mind to +tell him when he rejoins us," said Ellen, laughing. + +"Do so, my mischievous cousin, and I shall get a kiss for your pains. I +know where mamma's thoughts are, though she is trying to be as merry as +we are; she wants another to make this Oakwood hour complete." + +"I ought not to wish for your sister, my love, she is happier where she +is than she would be here, particularly to-night, for Lord D-- gives a +splendid _fĂªte_ at his beautiful villa, similar to that given by the +Duchess ten days ago at which I should think Caroline must have been +delighted, though she wrote but little of it." + +"There is a tone in her letters, mamma, that tells me she will be as +pleased as ourselves to be at Oakwood again, though, she may fancy +_fĂªtes_, assemblies, and a long list of et ceteras, are the most +delightful things in existence; and do you know, mamma, I will not +permit you to say you ought not to wish for her, because she is happier +where she is than she would be here; it is high treason in my presence +to say or even think so." + +"I must plead guilty, then, my Emmeline, and place my case in Ellen's +hands as counsel for the defendant, or throw myself on your mercy." + +"In consideration of the peculiar happiness of this evening, I pronounce +pardon," answered Emmeline, laughing, as she kissed her mother's hand. + +"A letter we received this morning tells us of one who longs to behold +us all again, spite of the many and varied pleasures of his exciting +life, does it not, my dear aunt?" + +"It does indeed, my love. Our Edward's letters have been, ever since he +left us, sources of consolation and delight to me, though I do excite my +Ellen's jealousy at the greater length of his letters to me than of +those to her," she added, smiling. + +"My brother knows if his letters to you impart pleasure and +satisfaction, he cannot bestow greater happiness on me, however short +mine may be," answered Ellen, earnestly; "and when he writes so fully to +you and so fondly to me, I have every reason to be quite contented; his +time is not so much at his own disposal as mine is." + +"I wonder where he can find time to write such lengthy epistles to +mamma," observed the smiling Emmeline. "I peeped over her shoulder this +morning as she was reading, and was astounded to perceive it was +written nearly as closely as mine would be. I wonder how he manages, +sailors are said to be such bad correspondents." + +"Have you forgotten what I used so repeatedly to say to you, when you +were a lazy little girl, Emmeline, and were ever ready to escape +disagreeable tasks, by saying you were quite sure you never could +succeed--Where there's a will there's a way?'" + +"Indeed, I have not forgotten it, dear mamma; it often comes across me +now, when I am ready to despair; and so I shall just read it to Master +Ned when he returns, as a lecture for not writing to me." + +"Nay, Emmeline, that would be demanding too much from our young sailor; +there is moderation in everything, you know." + +"Not in me, mamma," answered Emmeline, laughing. "You know I am always +in extremes, up in the skies one minute, and down, down on the lowest +earth the next. I sometimes wish I was like Ellen, always unruffled, +always calm and collected. You will go through the world better than I +shall, my quiet cousin." + +"Shall I?" replied Ellen, faintly smiling. But Mrs. Hamilton could +perceive that which the thoughtless Emmeline regarded not, a deep +crimson staining apparently with pain the pale fair cheek of her niece, +and she thought not with her daughter. + +"And how much longer does Ned intend being away from us?" demanded +Emmeline, after a long pause. + +"He cannot give us any idea yet," answered her mother; "perhaps some +time next year. They were to cruise off the shores of South America +these autumnal months, and winter, Edward thinks, off Buenos Ayres. He +is pleased at this, as he will see so very much more of the New World +than he expected, when he left us.'" + +"What an entertaining companion he will be when he returns," exclaimed +Emmeline. + +"Or rather ought to be, Emmeline," remarked Ellen, quietly. + +"Now, what an insinuation! Ellen, you are too bad to-night, and against +your brother, of all persons in the world. It is just like the ill +compliment you paid him on his gallantry in saving the Syren and all her +crew--absolutely would not believe that your brother Edward and the +young hero of my tale were one and the same person." + +"I can forgive her scepticism then," said Mrs. Hamilton, affectionately. +"The extraordinary efforts you described were indeed almost beyond +credence, when known to have been those of a lad but just seventeen; but +I hope my Ellen is no longer a sceptic as to the future fame and honour +of her brother," she added, kindly addressing her niece. + +"Oh, I dare not indulge in one half the bright visions, the fond hopes +that will intrude themselves upon my mind for him," exclaimed Ellen, +with involuntary energy. + +"Why, Ellen, are you sometimes a victim to the freaks of imagination as +well as myself?" asked her cousin, laughing. + +"I have frequently compelled myself to seek active employment," answered +Ellen, "lest those hopes should be indeed but fading visions, and my +disappointment more painfully bitter." + +"You do your brother injustice in even fancying disappointment," said +her aunt, playfully, "and I must act as defendant for the absent. I +believe, say, and protest my firm belief, that the name of Edward +Fortescue will stand one of the highest in naval fame, both as a +commander and a man. The naval honour of my family will, I feel assured, +have a worthy representative in my noble nephew, and I will not have one +word breathed in doubt or mistrust on the subject." + +"If you think so, then I may hope indeed," Ellen said with earnestness. +"And the recollection of the past"-- + +"Must heighten anticipations for the future, my dear girl, or I must +sentence them to perpetual banishment. Condemn them never to be +recalled," interrupted Mrs. Hamilton, still more playfully, and then +added-- + +"Emmeline, have you no wish to know how the object of your kind +sympathy, poor Lilla, parted from her father and me to day?" + +"I quite forgot all about it, mamma; this Oakwood hour has made me so +selfish. I thought of no one but ourselves," replied Emmeline. "Gratify +my curiosity now. Did Lady Helen evince any sorrow at the separation?" + +"Not so much as, for Lilla's sake, I could have wished. She has been so +unfortunately prejudiced against her both by Annie and Miss Malison, +that although I am convinced she loves her child, she never will evince +any proof of it; and Lilla's unhappy temperament has, of course, +increased this prejudice, which I fear will require years to remove, +unless Annie be soon married, and Miss Malison removed from Lady +Helen's establishment. Then Lilla's really excellent qualities will +quickly be made evident." + +"Mr. Grahame is already convinced she is a very different girl to that +she has been represented, is he not?" asked Ellen. + +"He is; and I trust, from the awakened knowledge, happiness is dawning +upon them both. I could not see unmoved his struggle to part with her +to-day, brief as the separation will be--scarcely six short months." + +"I was quite sure Mr. Grahame loved his children, though Annie and Cecil +did say so much about his sternness," said Emmeline, somewhat +triumphantly. + +"Mr. Grahame's feelings are naturally the very wannest, but +disappointment in some of his dearest hopes has, in some cases, +unfortunately caused him to veil them; I regret this, both for Cecil and +Lilla's sake, as I think, had he evinced greater interest and affection +for them in their childish years, they might both have been different in +character." + +"But it is not too late now?" + +"I trust not for Lilla, but I greatly fear, from all I have heard, that +Cecil's character is already formed. Terrified at his father's +harshness, he has always shrunk from the idea of making him his friend, +and has associated only with the young men of his mother's family, who, +some few years older than himself, and devoted to fashion, and gay +amusements, are not the very best companions he could have selected, but +whose near relationship seems to have prevented all interference on the +part of Mr. Grahame. Cecil must now be sixteen, and I fear no alteration +in his father's conduct will efface the impressions already received." + +"But, changed as Mr. Grahame is towards Lilla, was it still necessary +for her to go to Mrs. Douglas? Could not her reformation have been +effected equally well at home?" + +"No, my love; her father delighted at finding he had engaged her +affections, and that some of the representations he had heard were +false, would, in all probability, have gone to the contrary extreme, and +indulged her as much, if not more, than he had previously neglected her. +Lilla has very many faults, which require steady yet not harsh +correction, and which from her earliest age demanded the greatest care; +being neglected, they have strengthened with her years. The discipline +she will now be under will at first be irksome, and perhaps Lilla may +find all I have said in Mrs. Douglas's favour very contrary to reality; +but I have such a good opinion of her docility, when reasoned with +kindly, that I do not doubt all such impressions will be effaced when +she visits us at Christmas." + +"Well, however kind Mrs. Douglas may be, I should not like to be in +Lilla's place," observed Emmeline, and then added, with her usual +animation, "Ah, mamma, how can we ever be sufficiently grateful to you +for never sending us from you? I might have loved you very dearly, but I +could not have looked upon you as my best and dearest friend, as I do +now." + +"It is sufficient recompense for all my care that you do look on me +thus, my sweet child," exclaimed Mrs. Hamilton, with involuntary +emotion, and she bent down to impress a kiss on Emmeline's forehead as +she spoke, that she might conceal an unusual tear which had started to +her eye, for the unrestrained confidence and unabated affection of her +younger daughter, while it soothed, yet rendered the conduct of +Caroline by its contrast more painful; and, almost unconsciously, she +added-- + +"Oh, that this confidence and affection may never change, never be +withdrawn." + +"Change!" repeated Emmeline and Ellen at the same moment; but they +checked themselves, for they knew where the thoughts of their much-loved +relative had wandered, and they felt she had indeed sufficient cause for +all her solicitude. Recovering herself almost instantly, Mrs. Hamilton +resumed the conversation in a more cheerful tone, by demanding of +Emmeline if her busy fancy had pictured how Oakwood was to look, on +their return to it in a fortnight's time. + +"She certainly must have done so," answered Ellen, laughing; "for she +has had so many reveries over her drawing and work this week, that +nothing less important could have occasioned them." + +Emmeline shook her head archly, and answered gaily; and her dear old +venerable home was the engrossing theme of conversation till the return +of Mr. Hamilton, a short time afterwards. + +"Congratulate me, all of you," he said, in a joyous tone; "my business +is proceeding most favourably. Mr. Myrvin need know nothing about it +till all is settled; the dishonourable conduct of his enemies brought to +light, and himself reinstated in his little domain, once more the +minister of Llangwillan. Thanks to the able conduct of Mr. Allan, all +will soon be made clear. As soon as we are at Oakwood, Ellen, you shall +write to Mr. Myrvin, and invite him to spend some little time with us; +and when he leaves us, I trust it will be once more for Llangwillan and +its own pretty vicarage." + +"Dear, dear uncle!" exclaimed Ellen, starting up and clinging to his +arm, "oh, how can I thank you for your interference in behalf of him who +was the first friend I knew in England? the consoler of my +mother--the"-- + +"The good man who first told us what a troublesome charge I should find +in my niece," interrupted Mrs. Hamilton, playfully. + +"I have indeed been a trouble to you," replied Ellen, with a suppressed +yet heavy sigh, and her uncle's hand dropped from her grasp. + +"Ellen!" said Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton at the same instant, in an accent of +reproach. + +"Have I not?" she continued, with unusual impetuosity. "Did I not cause +you misery, you, who from the first moment you knew me, loved mo more +than I deserved? Did I not make both of you ill in health and wretched +in mind, and yet your kindness now is greater than before? There is not +a wish--not a desire I express, but is granted on the instant; and +I--oh, I have no power to--to"-- + +"You will, at least, have the power of making me seriously displeased if +you speak in this way again, and thus turn my sportive words to gloom," +said Mrs. Hamilton, gravely, but gently drawing the agitated girl with +tenderness to her. "Come, come, Ellen, I will not have Emmeline's happy +Oakwood hour thus alloyed. You may reward me yet for all, and one day, +perhaps, make me your debtor. That may appear very impossible now," she +added, smiling, as Ellen raised her large eyes incredulously to her +face; "but more improbable things have come to pass." + +"And where is Arthur to be while his father is with us?" demanded +Emmeline, joyously, of her father. "Not as a servitor at college, I +hope." + +"No; I anticipate the pleasure of welcoming the friend of Herbert as my +guest as well as his father, and then we shall deliberate on Arthur's +future life. I should like much to place him under Mr. Howard for a +year, and then establish him in a living of Lord Malvern's, in which I +have little doubt I could succeed." + +"Well, my fancy then will indeed be gratified. I shall see this proud +persecuted youth, and judge for myself if he be deserving or not of my +brother's friendship. Do you remember him, Ellen?" + +"Perfectly well; he was so very kind to me. I well recollect his grief +when I left the village, to live, he said, in such a very different +style, that it was not likely we should ever meet again." + +"But yet, you see, improbable as it appeared, you will meet again," said +Mrs. Hamilton in a marked tone, as she smiled. + +"So you call this an Oakwood hour, Emmy, do you?" demanded Mr. Hamilton, +after Arthur and his father had been duly discussed. "Suppose we make +the resemblance even more complete by ringing for lights, and you and +Ellen giving me some music. I have had no opportunities of hearing your +improvement, which, I suppose, under such able professors, has been +something extraordinary." + +"Marvellous, most marvellous!" exclaimed Emmeline, laughing, as she flew +to obey him by ringing the bell. "I had begun to fancy I was practising +for nothing, and that my father would never do his child the honour of +listening to her again, but I remembered the enchanted halls of Oakwood, +and I thought there at least I might chain him to my side, and so I +continued my labours." + +"Let us fancy ourselves there," replied her father, smiling; and lights +appearing, Emmeline and Ellen were speedily at the instruments, +bestowing pleasure unalloyed by this domestic use of their talents to +those dear ones who had so assiduously cultivated them. Their +improvement, under the best professors in London, had been rapid; for, +carefully prepared, no difficulties had to be overcome ere improvement +commenced; and the approbation and evident pleasure of Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton amply repaid those young and innocent beings for all the +exertions they had made, particularly Emmeline, who, as we know, had +determined, on her first arrival in London, to prove she would not +learn, when all around her was so changed. + +"Surely, surely, Caroline, surrounded by gaiety as she is, cannot be as +happy as I am to-night," burst with wild glee from the lips of Emmeline, +as at about half-past ten o'clock her father kissed her glowing cheek, +and thanked her for the pleasing recreation she had given him. She had +scarcely spoken, when a carriage was heard driving somewhat rapidly +through the Square, then stopped, it appeared at their door, and a +thundering and truly aristocratic rap resounded, startling not a little +the inmates of that peaceful drawing-room. + +"Who can it be at this hour?" demanded Emmeline, in an accent of +bewilderment. "How very disagreeable. I did not wish any intrusion +to-night. Mamma, dear mamma, you look terrified." + +Mr. Hamilton had opened the drawing-room door, and was about to descend +the stairs, for he too was startled at this unusual visit; but he +turned at Emmeline's words, for his wife did not usually indulge in +unfounded alarm or anticipated fears, but at that instant her wonted +presence of mind appeared about to desert her; she was pale as marble, +and had started up in an attitude of terror. + +Voices were heard, and stops, well-known steps, ascending the stairs. + +"It is the Duchess of Rothbury's voice and step--my child!" burst from +her lips, in an accent that neither Emmeline nor Ellen ever could +forget, and she sunk back almost fainting on her seat. Her children flew +to her side in alarm, but ere a minute had passed away that wild anxiety +was calmed, for Caroline herself entered with the Duchess, but her +death-like cheek, blanched lip, and haggard eye told a tale of suffering +which that mother could not mark unmoved. Vainly Mrs. Hamilton strove to +rise and welcome the Duchess: she had no power to move from her chair. + +"Caroline, my child!" were the only words her faltering tongue could +utter; and that agonized voice thrilled through the heart of the now +truly unhappy girl, and roused her from that trance of overwhelming +emotion which bade her stand spell-bound at the threshold. She sprung +forward, and sinking at her mother's feet, buried her face in her robe. + +"Mother, my injured mother, oh, do not, do not hate me!" she murmured, +in a voice almost inarticulate. "I deserve to be cast from your love, to +lose your confidence for ever. I have deceived you--I--" Sobs choked her +utterance, and the grieving mother could only throw her arms around her +child, and press her convulsively to her heart. Anxiety, nearly equal +to that of his wife, had been an inmate of Mr. Hamilton's bosom as the +Duchess's voice reached his ear; but as he glanced on Caroline, a frown +gathered on his brow. He trembled involuntarily, for he felt assured it +was imprudence, to give it the mildest term, in her conduct that called +for this untimely visit, this strange return to her home. Already he had +been deceived; and while every softened feeling struggled for mastery in +the mother's bosom, the father stood ready to judge and to condemn, +fiercely conquering every rising emotion that swelled within. There was +even more lofty majesty in the carriage of her Grace, as she carefully +closed the drawing-room door behind her, and slowly advanced towards +Mrs. Hamilton; a cold, severe, unbending expression in every feature, +that struck terror to the hearts of both Emmeline and Ellen, whose +innocent festivity was indeed now rudely checked. + +"Mrs. Hamilton," the Duchess said, and the grave and sad accents of her +voice caused the anxious mother hastily to raise her head, and gaze +inquiringly in her face, "to my especial care you committed your child. +I promised to guard her as my own, and on that condition alone you +entrusted her to me; I alone, therefore, restore her to you, thank God, +unscathed. I make no apology for this strange and apparently needless +intrusion at this late hour; deceived as I have been, my house was no +longer a fitting home for your daughter, and not another night could I +retain her, when my judgment told me her father's watchful guardianship +alone could protect her from the designing arts of one, of whom but very +little is known, and that little not such as would recommend him to my +favour. You, too, have been deceived, cruelly deceived, by that weak, +infatuated girl. Had you been aware that Lord Alphingham was her +secretly favoured lover, that the coldness with which she ever treated +him in public, the encouragement of another, were but to conceal from +you and her father her attachment to him, you would not have consented +to her joining a party of which he was a member. At my house he has +received increased encouragement. I marked them with a jealous eye, for +I could not believe his attentions sanctioned either by you or Mr. +Hamilton; but even my vigilance was at fault, for she had consented to +sever every tie which bound her to her too indulgent parents, and fly +with him to Scotland. This night would have seen the accomplishment of +their design. Had one of my children behaved thus, it would have been +less a matter of bewilderment to me than such conduct in a daughter of +yours. I have neglected to seek their confidence, their affection. You +have never rested in your endeavours to obtain both, and therefore, that +such should be your recompense is sad indeed. I sympathise with you, my +dearest friend," she continued, in a tone of much more feeling than she +ever allowed to be visible. "In the tale of shame I am repeating, I am +inflicting misery upon you, I feel I am; and yet, in resigning my +charge, I must do my duty, and set you on your guard, and let this one +reflection be your comfort, that it was the recollection of your +untiring care, your constant affection, which checked this infatuated +girl in her career of error, and bade her pause ere it was too late. For +her sufferings I have little pity; she is no longer the character I +believed her. Neither integrity, honour, nor candour can be any longer +inmates of her heart; the confession I have heard this night has +betrayed a lengthened scheme of deception, to which, had I heard it of +her, I should have given no credence. Forgive me, my dear Emmeline, and +look not on me so beseechingly; painful as it is, in the sincerest +friendship alone I place before your too partial eyes the real character +of your child. I have now done my duty, and will therefore leave you. +God bless you, and grant you strength to bear this bitter trial." She +turned to the unhappy father, who, as she spoke, had, overcome with +uncontrollable agitation, sunk on a chair and covered his face with his +hands, but with a strong effort he roused himself as she pronounced his +name, and rose. + +"Mr. Hamilton, to your wife, your inestimable wife, you owe the +preservation of your child this night from sin. Let her not, I beseech +you, afflict herself too deeply for those sufferings under which she may +behold Caroline for a time the victim. She deserves them all--all; but +she merits not one half that affection which her fond and loving mother +would lavish on her. I leave you now, but, trust me, feeling deeply for +you both." + +"Nay, rest with us to night, at least," exclaimed Mr. Hamilton, +conquering himself sufficiently to think of his friend's situation, +alone, in London, at such a late hour, and endeavouring to persuade her +to remain with them; but decidedly, yet kindly, she refused. + +"I sleep at St. James's, and shall be back at Airslie to-morrow morning +before my guests are recovered from the effects of to-night," she urged. +"Your hospitality is kindly meant, Hamilton, but I cannot accept it; +both Caroline and her mother can dispense with my company now." + +"Then let me accompany you home?" + +"I will not hear of it, my good friend. Good night, once more; God bless +you!" + +Mr. Hamilton knew the character of his noble friend too well to urge +more, and therefore contented himself by accompanying her down stairs. + +To describe Mrs. Hamilton's feelings, as she listened to the words of +the Duchess, would be indeed a vain attempt. We know all the anguish she +had suffered when Caroline's conduct had first caused her uneasiness, +and now the heightened agony of her fond heart may be easily imagined. +Almost unconsciously she had withdrawn her arm; but Caroline clung more +convulsively to her robe, and her first wild words sounded again and +again in her mother's ears, soothing while they inflicted pain. + +"Can it be possible I have heard aright? Have I indeed been thus +deceived?" she asked, struggling to speak calmly, when the Duchess and +her husband had left the room; and she fixed her sad, searching glance +upon Caroline, who for a moment raised her head. + +"Mother, dearest mother, condemn me, despise me as you please; I deserve +it all," she replied, in an accent of most piercing wretchedness. "Only +say that I may in time regain your love, your confidence; that you will +take me to your heart again. I have disregarded your affection; I have +wilfully cast it from me. Yet--oh, if you knew all I have suffered. +Mamma, mamma, oh, speak but one word more of kindness! I know I deserve +it not, but my heart feels breaking. I have no other friend on earth +but you; oh, call me but your child again, mother!" + +Her voice utterly failed, a film suddenly obscured her sight, and a +sense of suffocation rose in her throat; the misery of the last ten +days, the wretchedness and excitement of that day had deprived her of +more strength than she was at all aware of, and with one convulsive +effort to clasp her mother's hand to her throbbing heart, she sunk +exhausted at her feet. Emmeline would have flown for assistance, but a +look from her mother bade her pause, and she remained with Ellen to seek +those restoratives that were at hand. With a throbbing heart and +trembling hand, Mrs. Hamilton raised her repentant child, and with the +assistance of Emmeline placed her tenderly on the nearest couch, +endeavouring, though for some few minutes in vain, to recall her +scattered senses. Tears fell from that fond mother's eyes upon +Caroline's deathlike features, and ere life returned she had been +pressed again and again to her heart, and repeated kisses imprinted on +her marble brow. It mattered not at that moment that she had been +deceived, that Caroline had withdrawn alike her confidence and +affection, that her conduct the last few months had been productive of +bitter disappointment and extreme anguish, all, all was forgotten; the +mother only knew her child was suffering--only felt she was restored to +her arms; again and again she kissed her erring child, beseeching her +with fond and gentle words to wake and know she was forgiven. + +Slowly Caroline recovered consciousness, and unclosing her eyes, gazed +wildly yet sadly on all by whom she was surrounded. All the father had +struggled with Mr. Hamilton, as he stood by her side during the +continuance of her swoon; but now sternness again darkened his brow, and +he would have given vent to his wounded feelings in severe though just +reproaches, but the beseeching glance, the agonized voice of his wife +arrested him. + +"Arthur, my husband, oh, for my sake, spare her now!" she passionately +exclaimed, clasping his hand in hers, and looking up in his face with +imploring earnestness. "Spare her, at least, till from her own lips we +have heard all; she is in no state to bear anger now, however deserved. +Arthur, dearest Arthur, oh, do not reproach her till we know what it is +that has caused the wretchedness, the suffering we behold! For my sake, +spare her now." + +"Mother," murmured the unhappy girl, with a powerful effort rising from +the couch, and flinging herself on Mrs. Hamilton's neck, "do not plead +for me; I do not deserve it. My conduct to you the last few months would +alone demand the severest reproaches papa could inflict; and that, oh, +that is but little to the crime I should have committed, had not the +remembrance of all your devotion rushed to my mind, and arrested me, but +a few brief hours ere it would have been too late, and I should have +sacrificed myself to a man I discovered I did not love, merely to prove +I was not a slave to your dictates, that I had a will of my own, and +with or without your consent would abide by it. I have been infatuated, +blind--led on by artful persuasion, false representations, and weakly I +have yielded. Do not weep for me, Emmeline, I am not worthy of your +tears. You would have guided me aright; you would have warned me, +advised me, but I rejected your counsel, spurned your affection; with +contempt, aversion from all, from each, do I deserve to be regarded. +Ellen, you may triumph now; I did all I could to prove how I hated and +despised you some months ago, and now, oh, how much more I have fallen. +Oh, why, why did I ever leave Oakwood?--why was I so eager to visit +London?" Exhaustion choked her voice, the vehemence with which she had +spoken overpowered her, and her mother was compelled to lead her to a +couch, and force her to sit down beside her. Mr. Hamilton spoke not; for +a few minutes he paced the room with agitated steps, and then hastily +quitted it. + +"It is so very late, you had better retire, my dear girls," Mrs. +Hamilton said, after a brief pause, addressing Emmeline and Ellen, who +yet lingered sorrowfully near her. They understood her hint, and +instantly obeyed, both affectionately but silently embracing Caroline +ere they departed; and it was a relief to Mrs. Hamilton's anxious bosom +to find herself alone with her painfully repentant child. For some time +did that interview continue; and when Caroline retired to rest, it was +with a spirit lighter than it had been for many weeks, spite of the dark +clouds she still felt were around her. All her strange wayward feelings +had been confessed. She laid no stress on those continued letters she +had received from Annie, which had from the first alienated her from her +mother. Remorse was too busy within to bid her attempt to defend herself +by inculpating others; but though she carefully avoided reference to her +misleading friend, Mrs. Hamilton could easily, very easily, perceive +from whose arts all her own misery and Caroline's present suffering +originated; and bitterly in secret she reproached herself for ever +permitting that intimacy to continue, and obtain the influence it had. +To Lord St. Eval and her conduct to him the unhappy girl also referred. +Pride was completely at an end; every question Mrs. Hamilton asked was +answered with all that candour and integrity which had once +characterised her most trifling words; and while her undisguised +confession on many points occasioned the most poignant sorrow, yet +still, as the mother listened, and gazed on those expressive features, +something whispered within her that her child would be a blessing still. +She owned that from the moment she had rejected Lord St. Eval, regret +had become so unceasing, that to escape it she had listened to and +encouraged Lord Alphingham more than she had done before; his +professions of devoted love had appeared as balm, and deadened the +reproaches of conscience. Why she had so carefully concealed from her +parents that which she imagined was love for the Viscount she could not +explain, unless it was her weakness in following the example of others, +who, she had been told, shrunk from confessing love-stories to their +mothers; or, and that Mrs. Hamilton believed much nearer the real +reason, she did not love him sufficiently to implore their consent to +his addresses. She acknowledged, when their prohibition to her +acquaintance with him was given, she had longed to confess the truth, +and implore them at least to say why she might no longer enjoy his +society; but that she had felt too indignant at what she deemed the +slavery in which she was held, and discontent and irritation then took +possession of her, instead of willing obedience. She described her +feelings when he appeared at Airslie, the many struggles she then had +with herself; and, finally, her wretchedness from the moment she had +consented to be his wife; her entreaties that he would permit her to +implore her father's consent; her agony the same evening; her fervent +prayer for forgiveness and guidance; and, at length, her determination +to elude him by setting off for home the instant the Duchess and her +party had left the villa, which intention she had endeavoured to put in +force by imploring the assistance and secrecy of her Grace's own maid to +procure her a safe carriage and fleet horses, as she was compelled to +return home that same night; she would leave a note, she said, +explaining her reason for her departure to her Grace. She fancied +Allison must have betrayed her, as, when she was every minute expecting +to hear the carriage was ready, the Duchess entered her room, and, after +a brief but stern interview, ordered her own carriage, and had herself +accompanied her to town. + +Mrs. Hamilton listened to this long sad tale without interrupting it by +a word of reproach. Not once did she speak aught that might tend to +increase the anguish under which it was so evident Caroline was +suffering. Soothingly she spoke, and that fond yet saddened tone caused +the poor girl's bursting heart to find relief in a violent flood of +tears. She clung, even as in childhood, to her mother's neck, and as she +wept, felt yet more bitterly the infatuated folly of her conduct in +having for a moment forsaken the guidance of her true and kindest +friend, for the apparently more pleasing, because flattering, confidence +of one whom she now knew to be false and utterly deceiving. + +"But may he not still claim me?" she wildly exclaimed. "Will he not hold +me up to the world as a faithless, capricious girl? I shall be the +laughing-stock of all with whom we associate. Annie is not likely to +keep my secret. Oh, why did I ever confide in her? Mother, I shall be +despised, derided. I know I have brought it on myself, but oh, how can I +bear it?" + +"We leave London so very shortly, that I trust you will not be exposed +to the derision you so much dread," replied Mrs. Hamilton, soothingly, +"and by next season I hope all floating rumours that your conduct must +occasion may have entirely passed away. You need not fear the scorn of +the circle in which we principally mingle; and that of Annie's +companions, if the dread of their laughter keep you from seeking, as you +have done, their society, forgive me, my love, if I say I shall rejoice; +for you will then no longer be exposed to example and precept contrary +to those I have endeavoured to instil." + +"But, Lord Alphingham, what will he say or do?" murmured Caroline, +almost inaudibly. + +"You must write to him, Caroline, dissolving your engagement; there is +no other way." + +"Write to him, mother, I--oh, no, no, I cannot." + +"If you do not, you will still be exposed to constant annoyance; he may +choose to believe that you were forced by compulsion to return to us. +The circumstance of the Duchess herself accompanying you to town, he +will consider as sufficient evidence. Acting on your promise, on your +avowed preference, unless you write yourself, he will leave no means +untried to succeed in his sinful schemes. Painful as is the task, or +rather more disagreeable than painful if you do not love him, no one but +yourself must write, and the sooner you do so the better." + +"But if he really loves me? How can I--how dare I inflict more pain, +more disappointment, than I have done already?" + +"Loves you!" repeated Mrs. Hamilton, and displeasure mingled in her +saddened tone; "Caroline, do not permit yourself to be thus egregiously +deceived. He may fancy that he does, but it is no true honourable love; +if it were, would he thus bear you by stealth from the friend to whom +you were intrusted? If his conscience were indeed free from all stain, +would he have refused your entreaties that you might confess your love +to us, and beseech our blessing on your union? Would he have shrunk from +defending his conduct according to your advice? Nay, more; if this +accusation, which he has traced by some means to Percy, were indeed +unfounded and unjust, do you think he would have refrained one moment +from coming forward and asserting, not only by word but by proof, his +unblemished innocence? His silence is to me the clearest proof of +conduct that will not bear investigation; and I tremble to think what +miseries, what wretchedness might have been your portion, had you indeed +consented to his unworthy proposal." Her voice faltered, and she drew +the still weeping girl closer to her, as if her maternal love should +protect her from every evil. Caroline answered not, and after a few +minutes Mrs. Hamilton said, with tenderness-- + +"You do not repent your decision, my own child? You do not regret that +you have returned to those who love and cherish you so fondly? Speak to +me, love." + +Convulsively Caroline's hand pressed her mother's as if that pressure +should say nothing more should part them; then suddenly sinking on her +knees before her, she forced back the choking sobs, and said, clearly +and distinctly--- + +"Mother, I dare no longer ask you to believe my simple word, as in +former years you would have done, I have deceived you too long, too +culpably for that; but now, on my knees, solemnly, sacredly I swear, I +will never marry without papa's and your consent. I dare no longer trust +myself; I have once been rendered blind by that sinful craving for +freedom from all authority, for unchecked independence of thought and +word and deed, and never, never more will I stand forth in my own +weakness. My fate is in your hands, for never will I marry without your +blessing; and may that vow be registered above as solemnly as it is now +taken. Mother, you will not refuse to accept it," she added, laying her +trembling hand on Mrs. Hamilton's, and gazing beseechingly in her face. + +"I will not, my child!" and her mother struggled severely to conquer her +emotion and speak calmly. "Tell me only it is in my affection you +confide, that it is not under feelings of remorse alone you have made +this solemn vow. Promise me you will no longer permit a doubt of my +affection and interest in your happiness to enter your mind and poison +your confidence in me, as it has done. From that doubt all the present +misery has proceeded. You have imagined your parents harsh and cruel, +while they have only thought of your welfare. Say only you will trust in +our affection, my child, my own Caroline." + +"Oh, that I had ever trusted in it. My blindness and folly concealed +from me my misconduct, and bade me ascribe all my sufferings to you, on +whom I have inflicted so much pain. Mother, oh, forgive me, plead for +me to papa. I know he is seriously displeased, he has every right to be +so; but he knows not all I have endured, the agony of the last week. I +deserve his severest reproaches, but my heart feels as if it would break +beneath his anger now," and she laid her aching head on her mother's +lap, and wept. + +"My forgiveness, my blessing, are both yours, my own. Do not weep thus," +replied Mrs. Hamilton, imprinting a kiss on that burning forehead. "And +your father too, when he has heard all, will not withhold his love." + +"I will write to Lord Alphingham now, mother; it is useless to defer it, +and my mind will not regain its peace till it is done," exclaimed +Caroline, after a brief pause, which had followed her mother's words. + +"Not now, my love, you are too agitated still," replied her mother, +gazing anxiously on her flushed cheek; "wait till sleep shall have +calmed this inward fever, and restored you to composure. I do not think +you can write it now." + +"I cannot sleep till I have, mamma, indeed I cannot. I ought to have +left it for him before I quitted Airslie, but I could then think of +nothing but the ardent longing to see you, to hear your voice again; let +me write now." + +And believing her words were true, that in all probability she would not +sleep while that letter was on her mind, Mrs. Hamilton made no further +objection, and rose to place the inkstand and portfolio on a table near +her. Caroline remained still kneeling, and by her attitude Mrs. Hamilton +fancied was engaged in secret prayer; her tears were checked as she +rose, and it was with firmness she walked to the table and drew a seat +beside it. Anxiously for a few minutes did her mother watch her as she +wrote. At first her hand appeared to tremble, but a successful effort +conquered that emotion, and the increasing flush upon her cheek alone +proclaimed the agitation of her mind. So deeply was she engrossed in her +painful task, that she did not observe her mother had left the room, and +remained absent for a few minutes, returning, however, before she had +finished her letter. Without looking up, she placed the paper in Mrs. +Hamilton's hands, and, leaning her arms on the table, buried her face in +her hands. + +Mrs. Hamilton folded the letter in perfect silence; but then taking the +hand of her daughter from her eyes, she pressed it in hers, and said, in +a voice of deep emotion-- + +"I am satisfied, my child. Let this letter be directed and sealed with +your own hand, and the name of Lord Alphingham shall never again pass my +lips. It is enough that duty and affection have triumphed over his +intentions. I know not all the evil that might have been yours had he +succeeded, but you are restored to me, and may God forgive him as freely +as I do." + +With a steady hand Caroline directed and placed her own seal to the +letter; and then, exhausted by the agitation of that evening, she leaned +her throbbing head against her mother. + +"Caroline, my child!" exclaimed a deep and saddened voice beside her. +She started, and looking up, beheld her father, who had been gazing at +her an unobserved spectator for the last half hour. + +"Forgive me, dearest father. Oh, let me not sleep to-night without your +forgiveness. Mamma will not cast me from her heart; she has blessed me, +and I have injured her even more than you. Papa, dear papa, oh, speak to +me but one word of fondness!" she entreated, as her father drew her to +his bosom, and as she ceased, mingled his blessing and forgiveness in +that warm embrace. + +It was late, so late, that the early morn was beginning to gild the +horizon before Mrs. Hamilton had seen her agitated child placed in bed, +and persuaded her to compose her spirits and invite sleep. Fondly her +mother watched beside her till the grey dawn had penetrated within the +room; and then perceiving that calm, sleep had come at length, she +retired to her own apartment. There sinking on her knees, her +overcharged heart found blessed relief in pouring forth to Heaven its +fervent thanksgiving for that great mercy vouchsafed her in the +restoration of her child. The anguish of the past, the suffering of the +present were alike forgotten, in the thought that Caroline's affection +and confidence were again restored to her. The veil had at length been +removed from her eyes. Annie's character was revealed before her and the +sorrowful and repentant girl had once more sought for sympathy in the +bosom of her mother. She now felt that mother was her truest friend, and +a glow of sweet and soothing pleasure stole over Mrs. Hamilton's mind at +this conviction. Caroline had said it was the recollection of her +mother's care, devotion, and love that had stayed her, ere it was too +late. She could not banish from her heart the duty therein so long and +carefully implanted; the principles of religion, of virtue, shaken as +they had been in that painful moment of indecision, had preserved her +from misery. Often, very often, Mrs. Hamilton had felt disheartened, +almost despairing in her task, during both the childhood and youth of +Caroline, but now her recompense was apparent. Had she not persevered, +had she been indolent or careless in the discharge of her duty, had she +left the care of that child to strangers, who would never have thus +studied or guided so difficult a disposition, there would have been +naught to bid her pause. She would have done as others too often do, and +fearful indeed would have been her chastisement. Now, what were all Mrs. +Hamilton's self-conquering struggles, all the pain she had suffered, +compared with the exquisite happiness of feeling that her care had +preserved her child, and she knew not as yet from what depth of +wretchedness? Fervent was the gratitude for that grace which had +permitted her to guide her child aright; and as she recalled the +heartfelt approbation of her conduct, which her beloved husband had +gratefully expressed, happiness filled her heart, and many, very many +might have envied that noble woman her feelings, as she laid her head on +her pillow that night, when sleep only hushed the still lingering +thanksgiving on her lips. + +It may be well here briefly to relate all that had passed at Airslie, +from the moment we left Caroline imploring pardon and guidance from Him, +to whom she had never appealed in vain, to that when she so suddenly +appeared in company with the Duchess in Berkeley Square. To accede to +Lord Alphingham's wishes, she felt was no longer possible, but how to +avoid him was a matter of still greater difficulty. To accompany the +Duchess and thus elude him, she could not, for she felt neither her +strength nor spirits could sustain her through the whole of that festive +night. Each minute as it passed increased the fever of her brain, at +length in despair she determined on the conduct with which we are +already acquainted. As soon as the last carriage had rolled from the +door she summoned Allison, the Duchess's own maid, and in accents that +painfully betrayed the agitation within, implored her to procure her a +carriage and fleet horses, as circumstances had occurred which obliged +her instantly to return to town. She besought her neither to question +her nor to speak of her sudden resolution to any one, as the note she +would leave behind for her Grace would fully explain all. Allison +remained for some few minutes gazing on the agitated girl, in motionless +astonishment. + +"Return to London at such a time of night, and alone," she rather +allowed to drop from her lips than said, after a long pause. + +"Oh, would to heaven some one would go with me! but I know none whom I +can ask," Caroline replied, in a tone of anguish, and seizing Allison's +hand, again and again implored her assistance. Briefly she promised to +do all she could for her, and left her, not to do her bidding by seeking +some conveyance, but to report the strange request and still more +alarming manner of Caroline to her Grace; who, for some secret reason, +which her daughters and friends in vain endeavoured to solve, had at the +very last moment declared her intention of not accompanying them, and +wishing them, with the utmost kindness, a pleasant evening, commissioned +Lady Lucy and her eldest brother, who had lately joined them, to supply +her place in their own party, and tender her excuses to the noble master +of the _fĂªte_. The simple truth was, that the penetration of the Duchess +had observed and detected from the very first the manoeuvres of Lord +Alphingham and Caroline. + +The former, as may have already been discovered, was one of those +against whom her prejudice was very strong. With her own free will, Lord +Alphingham would never have visited at her house, although she was never +heard to breathe one word to his disadvantage; especially invited he +never was, and in heart she was much annoyed at her husband's marked +preference and encouragement of his society. She had observed her friend +Mrs. Hamilton's coldness towards him; and as much as she admired the +conduct of the mother, so she sometimes found herself mistrusting the +studied air and guarded reserve with which Caroline ever treated the +Viscount. The sudden change in Mr. Hamilton's manner had also struck +her, and therefore, when Alphingham joined her coterie, not once did she +ever fail in the jealous watchfulness with which she regarded him and +Caroline. Rendered suspicious by all that she had observed, Caroline's +determination not to join the party that evening had increased her +uneasiness to a degree that almost amounted to alarm, and that very +instant her resolution was fixed to remain at Airslie. She desired +Allison not to mention her intention of remaining to Miss Hamilton, but +to inform her minutely of all that passed during the evening; and her +astonishment was almost as great as her domestic's had been when +Caroline's desire was related to her. + +It wanted but one half hour to the time appointed by the Viscount, and +Caroline still sat in a state of anxiety and suspense, which tortured +her almost to frenzy. Unable to bear it longer, her hand was on the bell +once more to summon Allison, when the lock of the door turned, and +starting forwards, the words, "Is all ready--have you succeeded?" were +arrested on her lips by the appearance of the Duchess herself, who, +closing the door, stood gazing on the terrified girl with a glance of +severity and command few could have met unmoved. Scarcely conscious of +what she did, Caroline started back, and, sinking on a stool at the +farthest end of the room, covered her face with her hands. + +"May I know with what intent Miss Hamilton is about to withdraw herself +from my roof and my protection?" she demanded, in those brief yet +searching tones she ever used when displeased. "What reason she can +allege for this unceremonious departure from a house where she has ever +been regarded as one of its most favoured inmates? Your mother trusted +you to my care, and on your duty to her I demand an answer." She +continued, after a brief pause, in which Caroline neither moved nor +spoke, "Where would you go at this unseasonable hour?" + +"Home to my mother," murmured the unhappy girl, in a voice almost +inarticulate. + +"Home!" repeated her Grace, in a bitterly satirical tone. "Strange, that +you should thus suddenly desire to return. Were you not the child of +those to whom equivocation is unknown, I might well doubt that +tale;--home, and wherefore?" + +"To save myself from the effects of my own sinful folly--my own +infatuated madness," replied Caroline, summoning with a strong effort +all the energy of her character, and with a vehemence that flushed her +pallid cheek with crimson. "In this at least I am sincere, though in all +else I deserve no longer to be regarded as the child of such +noble-minded beings as are my parents. Spurn me from you as you will, +this is no moment for equivocation and delay. I have deceived your +Grace. I was about to bring down shame upon your house, to cause your +indignant displeasure, my parents anguish, myself but endless remorseful +misery. To save all this, I would return home to implore the +forgiveness, the protection of my parents; they alone can guard me from +myself. Oh, if you ever loved my mother," she continued, starting up +with agony, as the hour of nine chimed on her ear, "send some one with +me, and let me go home. Half an hour more," and her voice grew almost +inarticulate with suppressed emotion, "and it may be too late. Mother, +mother, if I could but see you once again!" + +"Before, as the wife or the victim of the Right Honourable Lord +Alphingham, you fly from her for ever, and thus reward her cares, her +love, her prayers, wretched and deceiving girl," sternly and slowly the +Duchess said, as she rapidly yet with her usual majesty paced the room, +and laid her hand heavily on Caroline's shoulder, as she sat bowed down +with shame before her. "Deny it not; it was thus you would bring down +shame on my home; thus create agony for your devoted parents; thus prove +your gratitude, love, obedience, by wrenching every tie asunder. Oh, +shame, shame! If this be the fruit of such tender cares, such careful +training, oh, where shall we seek for honour and integrity--in what +heart find virtue? And why not consummate your sin? why pause ere your +noble and virtuous resolution was put in force? why hesitate in the +accomplishment of your designs? Why not fly with your honourable lover, +and thus wring the fond hearts of your parents at once to the utmost? +Why retract now, when it will be only to delude again? Miserable and +deluded girl, what new whim has caused this sudden change? Wherefore +wait till it be too late to repent--to persuade us that you are an +unwilling abettor and assistant in this man's schemes? Go, fly with him; +it were better to reconcile your indulgent mother to an eternal +separation, than that she should take you once more to her heart, and be +again deceived. Go, your secret is safe. How dare you speak of +inflicting misery on your parents? Must not hypocrisy lurk in every +word, when wilfully, recklessly, you have already abused their +confidence and insulted their love? much more you cannot do." She +paused, as if in expectation of a reply, but none came. Caroline's +breaking heart had lost that proud spirit which, a few days before, +would have called a haughty answer from her lips. She writhed beneath +those stern unpitying accents, which perhaps in such a moment of +remorseful agony might have been spared, but she replied not; and, after +a brief silence, the Duchess again spoke. + +"Caroline, answer me. What has caused this sudden change in your +intentions? What has chanced between you and Lord Alphingham to demand +this sudden longing for home? What impulse bids you thus elude him?" + +"The memory of my mother's love," and Caroline raised her head, and +pushing back her disordered hair, gazed upon the face of the Duchess +with an expression of suffering few could have looked upon unmoved. +"You are right, I have deceived my too indulgent parents, I have abused +their confidence, insulted their love; but I cannot, oh, I cannot still +those principles within me which they have implanted. In my hours of +maddening folly I remembered them not; I believed they had gone from me +for ever, and I should be happy. They have returned to torture me, to +tell me that as the wife of Lord Alphingham, without the blessing of my +parents, I shall be wretched. I have brought down endless misery on +myself--that matters not; but oh, I will not cause them further +suffering. I will no longer wring the heart of my gentle mother, who has +so often prayed for her erring child. Too late, perhaps, I have +determined, but the wife of Lord Alphingham I will never be; but his +character is still dear to me, and I entreat your Grace not to withdraw +your favour from him. He alone is not to blame, I also am culpable, for +I acknowledge the encouragement I have given him. My character for +integrity is gone, but his is still unstained." + +"Fear not for him, my favour he has never had; but my honour is too dear +to me for such an affair as this to pass my lips. Let him continue the +courted, the spoiled, the flattered child of fashion he has ever been. I +regard him not. Let him run his course rejoicing, it matters not to me." +She rang the bell as she spoke, and slowly and silently paced the room +till Allison obeyed the summons. "Desire James to put four swift horses +to the chariot. Important business calls me instantly to London; bid him +use dispatch, every moment is precious." + +Allison departed, and the Duchess continued pacing the apartment till +she returned, announcing the carriage as ready. A very few minutes +sufficed for their personal preparations, for the Duchess to give +peremptory orders to her trusty Allison to keep her departure a profound +secret, as she should return before her guests were stirring the next +morning, and herself account for Miss Hamilton's sudden return home. Few +words were sufficient for Allison, who was in all respects well fitted +for the situation she held near a person of the Duchess of Rothbury's +character; and the carriage rolled rapidly from Airslie. + +Not another word passed between the travelling companions. In feverish +agitation on the part of Caroline, in cold, unbending sternness on that +of the Duchess, their journey passed. To the imagination of the former, +the roll of the carriage-wheels was the sound of pursuing horses; in +every turn of the road her fevered fancy beheld the figure of Lord +Alphingham: at one time glaring on her in reproachful bitterness, at +another, in mockery, derision, satire; and when she closed her eyes, +those visions still tormented, nor did they depart till she felt her +mother's arm around her, her gentle voice pronounce her name. + +True to her determination, the Duchess left London as early as six the +following day, and, as usual, was the first within the breakfast-room, +and little could her friends imagine that since they had left her the +preceding evening she had made a journey to London and back. Caroline's +indisposition, which had been evident for several days, although she had +not complained till the day before, easily accounted for her return +home, although the exact time of her doing so was known to none save her +Grace herself; and even if surprise had been created, it would speedily +have passed away in the whirl of amusements which surrounded them. But +the courted, the admired, the fascinating Viscount no longer joined the +festive group. His friend Sir Walter Courtenay accounted for and excused +his absence, by stating that Lord Alphingham had received a disagreeable +letter from an agent of his in Scotland, which demanded his instant +presence; that he intended passing through London, thence proceed to the +North, where, in all probability, he should await the hunting season, +being engaged to join a large circle of noble friends. + +It would be useless to linger on the impotent fury of Lord Alphingham +when he discovered his well-conceived plans were utterly frustrated, and +that his intended victim had eluded him, under the stern guardianship of +the Duchess of Rothbury. In the first bitter moment of disappointment, +he refused to accuse Caroline of any share in it, but believed their +plans had been, by some unforeseen circumstance, discovered, and she had +been forced to return home. If such were the case, he vowed to withdraw +her from such galling slavery; he swore by some means to make her his +own. But when her letter reached him, when he had perused its contents, +and marked that not one word gave evidence of agitation of mind or +unsteadiness of purpose, the current of his feelings changed. He cursed +his own mad folly for thus seeking one, in whom from the first he might +have seen there was no spirit, no quality suited to be his partner in a +fashionable world; he vowed to think no more of a weak, capricious fool, +so he now termed the girl he had fancied that he loved. As may readily +be imagined, he felt his self love very deeply wounded by the complete +frustration of his intentions, and being incapable of appreciating the +better principles which had fortunately actuated the resolve of +Caroline, a spirit of revenge entered his heart. He crushed the letter +in his hand, and paced the room in fury, and would have torn it to +atoms, when the thought struck him, that by enclosing the letter to the +confidant and adviser of his plans regarding Caroline, he might save +himself the mortification of relating his defeat, and revenge himself +effectually by exposing her to ridicule and contempt. + +He wrote therefore a few concise lines, regretting, in a slightly +satirical style, that Miss Grahame should have been so deceived with +regard to the views and feelings of her friend Miss Hamilton, and +referring her to the enclosed letter for all further explanation. + +Annie received this packet at the time she was in daily expectation of +the triumph of her schemes, the gratification of her dislike for the +being whose gentle admonitions she so much resented, which had been +dictated by Mrs. Hamilton's wish to increase the happiness of her +parents and herself. Lord Alphingham had regularly informed her of all +his intentions, and though Caroline had for some time entirely ceased to +write, yet she suspected nothing like defeat. Already she secretly +indulged in triumph, already anticipated the moment when every malignant +wish would be fulfilled, and she should see the proud, cold, disdainful +Mrs. Hamilton bowed down beneath the conduct of her child, humbled to +the dust by the reflections which would be cast upon her when the +elopement of Caroline should be made public; at that very time the +letter of Lord Alphingham arrived, and told her of defeat, complete, +irremediable. Scorn, bitter scorn curled her lip, as she glanced over +Caroline's epistle, thus dishonourably transmitted for her perusal. +Severe disappointment was for the time her portion, and yet, amid all +these violent emotions, attendant on one of her disposition, there was +one of a very different nature mingling with them, one that, while she +resolved if she could not mortify Mrs. Hamilton as she had intended, she +would yet do so by insinuations against Caroline's character, whenever +she had an opportunity; would bid her rejoice, strangely rejoice, that +she was not the wife of Lord Alphingham, that he was still free. While +she looked forward to that letter announcing the union of the Viscount +and Caroline, as placing the final seal on her triumphant schemes, we +may well doubt if even that enjoyment, the exultations in the sufferings +of another, would have stilled the anguish of her own heart, and +permitted her to triumph as she intended to have done, when the man she +loved was the husband of another. It was even so, though rendered by +prejudice almost insensible to anything but her hatred of Mrs. Hamilton. + +Annie had not associated so intimately with Lord Alphingham without +feeling the effect of his many fascinations; and, therefore, though both +provoked and disappointed at this unlooked-for failure of her schemes, +she was better enabled to overcome them. Resolving to leave her designs +against the peace of Caroline and her mother henceforth to chance, all +her energies were now put in action for the attainment of one grand +object, to so work upon the disappointed Viscount as herself to take the +place in his favour which Caroline had occupied. Her reply to his +letter, which he had earnestly requested might enclose Caroline's, and +be forwarded to him in London, was guarded, but artfully tending to +inflame his indignation against Caroline; suppressing her own opinion on +the subject, and exciting admiration of herself, and perhaps gratitude +for her untiring sympathy in his welfare, which she ably contrived +should breathe despondingly throughout. As that important affair, she +added, was thus unhappily over, their correspondence she felt ought to +cease, and she begged Lord Alphingham would write to her no more. She +had braved remark when the happiness of two in whom she was so deeply +interested was at stake; but as in that she had been disappointed, pain +as it was for her to be the one to check a correspondence which could +not fail to give her pleasure, being with one so enlightened, and in +every way so superior as Lord Alphingham, she insisted that no more +letters should pass between them. She gained her point; the Viscount +wondered how he could ever be so blind as to prefer Caroline to her, and +her words added weight to his resolution, to annoy the former by devoted +attentions to Miss Grahame, and, if it suited his interests, make the +latter his wife. + +The interviews Lord Alphingham contrived to have with Miss Grahame, +before he retired to Scotland, which he did not do for a fortnight after +his rejection, strengthened the intentions of both. The Viscount found +new charms in the reserve and agitation which now marked Annie's +behaviour, in the faint voice and well-concealed intelligence, that +however she might sympathise in his vexation, for herself she could not +regret his freedom. All this, though they were scarcely ever alone, +formed a perfect understanding between them, and quickly banished the +image of Caroline from the vain and fickle-minded Alphingham. + +Wishing to keep up her pretended friendship for Caroline, that she +might the more effectually wound her, and not believing the sentiments +of the misguided girl were changed towards her also, Annie called at +Berkeley Square a very few days after Caroline's return, and she had +become acquainted with all that had passed. No one was visible in the +drawing-room; the young men, she knew, had both arrived from college, +but the house was destitute of that air of cheerfulness and glee which +generally attended their return. Some little time she waited with +impatient displeasure, which did not lessen when, on hearing the door +open, she beheld, not Caroline but Mrs. Hamilton herself, her cheek +pale, as if from some internal suffering, but with even more than her +wonted dignity both in mien and step, and for a moment Annie struggled +in vain to speak with the eagerness with which she intended to have +inquired for Caroline; before the mild yet penetrating glance of Mrs. +Hamilton even her self-possession appeared about to abandon her. She +felt lowered, humbled in her presence, and it was this, perhaps, this +very sense of inferiority, which had ever heightened dislike. + +Mildly, yet coldly and briefly, Mrs. Hamilton answered Miss Grahame's +torrent of questions and regrets which followed her information, that +Caroline was not well enough to see any one but her own family, and +that, as they left London some little time sooner than they had +originally intended, she had begged her mother to tender her farewell. +Annie expressed excessive sorrow, but no effort on either side was made +to prolong this interview, and it was very quickly over. Annie returned +home dissatisfied and angry, determining to make one attempt more; and +if that failed, she thought she could as successfully wound by inuendoes +and ridicule, should mere acquaintance take the place of intimate +friendship. + +Miss Grahame accordingly wrote in a truly heroic and highly-phrased +style, regretting, sympathising, and encouraging; but the answer, though +guardedly worded, told her too plainly all her influence was over. + +"I am not strong enough," wrote Caroline, "yet to argue with you, or +defend my conduct, as I feel sure I should be compelled to do, did we +meet now. I find, too late, that on many points we differ so completely, +that the confidential intercourse, which has hitherto been ours, must +henceforth be at an end. Forgive me, dear Annie, if it grieves you to +read these words; believe me, it is painful to me to write them. But now +that my feelings on so many important subjects have been changed--now +that the blinding film has been mercifully removed from my eyes, and I +see the whole extent of my sinful folly, I cannot hope to find the same +friend in you. Too late, for my peace, I have discovered that our +principles of duty are directly opposite. I blame you not for what I am, +for the suffering I am still enduring, no, for that I alone have caused; +but your persuasions, your representations heightened the evil, +strengthened me in my sinful course. You saw my folly, and worked on it, +by sowing the seeds of mistrust and dislike towards my parents. I was a +passive tool in your hands, and you endeavoured to mould me according to +your notions of happiness. I thank you for all the interest you have +thus endeavoured to prove for me. You cannot regret withdrawing it, now +I have in your eyes proved myself so undeserving. This is the last +confidential letter I shall ever write, save to her who is indeed my +best, my truest, most indulgent friend on earth; but before I entirely +conclude, the love, the friendship I have felt for you compels me to +implore you to pause in your career. Oh, Annie, do not follow up those +principles you would have instilled in me; do not, oh, as you value +future innocence and peace, do not let them be your guide in life; you +will find them hollow, vain, and false. Pause but for one moment, and +reflect. Can there he happiness without virtue, peace without integrity? +Is there pleasure without truth? Was deception productive of felicity to +me? Oh, no, no. That visit to London, that introduction in the gay world +to which I looked forward with so much joy, the retrospection of which I +hoped would have enlivened Oakwood, oh, what does it present? A dreary +waste of life, varied only by remorse. Had my career been yours, you +would perhaps have looked on it differently; but I cannot. Oh, Annie, +once more, I beseech, let not such principles actuate your future +conduct; they are wrong, they will load to misery here, and what +preparation are they for eternity? + +"Farewell, and may God bless you! We shall not, perhaps, meet again till +next season, and then it cannot be as we have parted. An interest in +your welfare I shall ever feel, but intimacy must be at an end between +us. + +"CAROLINE." + + + + +CHAPTER VIII. + + +There was a dark lowering frown obscuring the noble and usually open +brow of the young heir of Oakwood, and undisguised anger visible in +every feature and every movement, as he paced the library with +disordered steps, about ten days after the events we have recorded, and +three since his return from college. He had crossed his arms on his +chest, which was swelling with the emotion he was with difficulty +repressing, and his tall, elegant figure appeared to increase in height +beneath his indignant and, in this case, just displeasure. + +Caroline's depression had not decreased since her brother's arrival. She +felt she had been unjust to Percy, and a degree of coldness which had +appeared at first in his conduct towards her, occasioned, though she +knew it not, by her rejection of his friend St. Eval, which he believed +was occasioned by her love of Alphingham, whom he fancied she still +continued to regard with an eye of favour; both these causes created +reserve and distance between the brother and sister, in lieu of that +cordiality which had hitherto subsisted between them. + +Percy had not been aware of all that had passed between the Viscount and +Caroline till that morning, when Emmeline, hoping to soften his manner +towards her sister, related, with all her natural eloquence, the +Viscount's conduct, and the triumph of duty which Caroline had achieved. +That he had even asked her of his father, Percy knew not till then, and +it was this intelligence bursting on him at once which called forth such +violent anger. Emmeline had been summoned away before she had time to +note the startling effects of her words; but Herbert did, and though he +was unacquainted with the secret cause of his brother's dislike towards +Lord Alphingham, he endeavoured by gentle eloquence to pacify and turn +him from his purpose, at which he trembled. + +"The villain, the cold-blooded, despicable villain!" muttered Percy at +intervals, as he continued his hurried pace, without heeding, perhaps +not hearing, Herbert's persuasive accents. "To act thus foully--to play +thus on the unguarded feelings of a weak, at least, unsophisticated, +unsuspecting girl--to gain her love, to destine her to ruin and shame, +the heartless miscreant! Oh, that my promise prevented not my exposing +him to the whole world; but there is another way--the villain shall find +such conduct passes not unheeded!" + +"You are right, Percy," interposed Herbert, gently determining not to +understand him. "If his conduct be indeed such as to call forth, with +justice, this irritation on your part, his punishment will come at +last." + +"It shall come, ay, and by this baud!" exclaimed Percy, striking his +clenched hand violently on the table; "if his conduct be such. You speak +coolly, Herbert, but you know not all, therefore I forgive you: it is +the conduct of a villain, ay, and he shall know it too. Before three +suns have set again, he shall feel my sister has an avenger!" + +"His schemes against the peace, the honour of the innocent are +registered on high; be calm, be satisfied, Percy. His last hour will be +chastisement enough." + +"By heaven, it shall be!" retorted Percy, passion increasing, it +appeared, at every gentle word his brother spoke, and irritating him +beyond control. "Herbert, you will drive me mad with this mistimed +calmness; you know not half the injury she has received." + +"Whatever might have been his schemes, they have all failed, Percy, and +therefore should we not rather feel thankful for Caroline's restoration +to her home, to herself, than thus encourage fury against him from whose +snares she has escaped?" + +"Yes; and though his base plan, thanks to my sister's strength of mind, +or, rather, my mother's enduring counsel, has not succeeded, am I to sit +calmly by and see her health, spirits, alike sinking beneath that love +which the deceiving villain knew so well how to call forth? am I to see +this, to gaze on the suffering he has caused, unmoved, and permit him to +pass unscathed, as if his victim had neither father nor brother to +protect and avenge her injured honour?" + +"Her honour is not injured. She is as innocent and as pure as before +Lord Alphingham addressed her. Percy, you are increasing this just +displeasure by imaginary causes. I do not believe it to be love for him +that occasions her present suffering; I think, from the conversations we +have had, it is much more like remorse for the past, and bitter grief +that the confidence of our parents must, spite of their excessive +kindness, be for a time entirely withdrawn, not any lingering affection +for Alphingham." + +"Whatever it be, he is the primary cause. Not injured! every word of +love from his lips is pollution; his asking her of my father an +atrocious insult; his endeavours to fly with her a deadly sin--an +undying stain." + +Herbert shuddered involuntarily. + +"What would you say, or mean?" he exclaimed. + +"What have you heard or known concerning him, that calls for words like +these?" + +"Ask me not, as you love me; it is enough I know he is a villain," and +Percy continued his rapid walk. Herbert rose from his seat and +approached him. + +"Percy," he said, "my dear brother, tell me what is it you would do? to +what would this unwonted passion lead? Oh, let it not gain too great a +dominion, Percy. Dear Percy, what would you do?" + +"I would seek him, Herbert," replied Percy, "where ever he is; by whom +surrounded. I would taunt him as a deceiving, heartless villain, and if +he demand satisfaction, by heaven, it would be joy for me to give it!" + +"Has passion, then, indeed obtained so much ascendancy, it would be joy +for you to meet him thus for blood?" demanded Herbert, fixing his large, +melancholy eyes intently on Percy's face, on which the cloud was +becoming darker, and his step even more rapid. "Would you seek him for +the purpose of exciting anger like your own? is it thus you would avenge +my sister?" + +"Thus, and only thus," answered Percy, with ungoverned fury. "As others +have done; man to man I would meet him, and villain as he is, I would +have honourable vengeance for the insult, not only to my sister, but to +us all. Why should I stay my hand?" + +"Why? because on you more than on many others has the light of our +blessed religion dawned," answered Herbert, calmly; "because you know +what others think not of, that the law of our Master forbiddeth blood; +that whosoever sheds it, on whatever plea, his shall be demanded in +return; because you know, in seeking vengeance by blood, His law is +disobeyed, and His vengeance you would call upon yourself. Percy, you +will not, you dare not act as this overwhelming passion dictates." + +"Dare not," repeated the young man, light flashing from his eye as if +his spirit chafed at that word, even from his brother, "dare not; you +mistake me, Herbert. I will not sit tamely down beneath an injury such +as this. I will not see that villain triumph without one effort to prove +to him that he is known, and make the whole world know him as he is." + +"And would a hostile meeting accomplish this? Would that proclaim his +villainy, of whatever nature it may be, to the world? Would they not +rather side with him, their present minion, and even bring forward your +unjustifiable conduct as a fresh proof in his favour? How would they +give credit to the terms they may hear you apply to him, when even in +your family you speak not of the true cause of this strange agitation +and indignant anger." + +Percy continued to pace the room for some minutes without answering. + +"My honour has been insulted in the person of my sister," he muttered, +at length, as if speaking more to himself than to his brother; "and am I +to bear that calmly? Were the truth made known, would not the whole +world look on me with scorn as a spiritless coward, to whom the law of +honour was as nothing; who would see his sister suffering from the arts +of a miscreant, without one effort to revenge her?" + +"The law of honour," replied Herbert, bitterly; "it is the law of blood, +of murder, of wilful, uncalled-for murder. Percy, my brother, banish +these guilty thoughts. Do not be one of those misguided beings who, +from that false deceiving plea, the law of honour, condemn whole +families to misery, and themselves, without preparation, without prayer, +nay, in the very act of disobeying a sacred commandment of their God, +rush heedless into His presence, into awful eternity." + +He paused, but not vainly had he spoken. Percy gazed on his brother's +features with greater calmness, and more kindly, but still impetuously, +said-- + +"Would you then have me stand calmly by and behold my sister a suffering +victim to his arts, though actual sin, thank God, has been spared, and +thus permit that villain Alphingham to continue his course triumphant?" + +"Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord, and I will repay it," answered +Herbert, instantly, twining his arm within that of his brother, and +looking up in his face with that beseeching glance of affection which +was so peculiar to his features. "Dear brother, rest on those words and +be contented. It is not for us to think of vengeance or to seek for +retribution; justice is, indeed, ours to claim, but in this case, there +is no point on which we can demand it. Let Alphingham, even granting you +know him as he is, pursue his course in peace. Did you endeavour to +inflict chastisement, is it not doubting the wisdom and justice of the +Almighty? And suppose you fell instead of your adversary, in the meeting +you would seek--what, think you, would be the emotions of all those who +so dearly love you, when they gazed on your bleeding corse, and +remembered you had sought death in defiance of every principle they had +so carefully instilled? Think of my mother's silent agony; has not +Caroline's conduct occasioned sufficient pain, and would you increase +it? you, whose most trifling action is dictated by love for her; you, in +whom she has every reason to look for so much virtue, honour, and +self-control; whom she so dearly, so devotedly loves? Remember what she +would feel; and, if no other consideration have effect, surely that will +bid you pause." + +Percy still paced the room, but his head was averted from his brother as +he spoke, and his step bespoke contending and painful emotions. He did +not answer when Herbert ceased to speak, but his brother knew him well, +and remained silent. + +"You have conquered, Herbert," he exclaimed at length, firmly clasping +his brother's hand in his and raising his head; anger still lingered on +his cheek, but his eye was softer. "I could not bear my mother's +wretchedness; I could not thus repay her love, her cherished care. I +will not seek this base and heartless man. I tremble for my present +resolution, if he chance to cross my path; but, for her sake, I will +avoid him; for her sake, his villainy shall be still concealed." + +"Endeavour to think of him more charitably, my dear Percy, or forget him +entirely, which you will." + +"Think of him charitably; him--a fashionable, fawning, seducing +hypocrite!" burst from Percy, in a tone of renewed passion. "No! the +gall he has created within me cannot yet be turned to sweetness; forget +him--that at least is impossible, when Caroline's coldness and reserve +remind me disagreeably of him every day. It is plain she looks on me as +the destroyer of her happiness; thinks, perhaps, had it not been for my +letter my father would have given his consent, and she might have +peacefully become the wife of Alphingham. It is hard to bear unkindness +from one whom I have endeavoured to preserve from ruin." + +"Nay, do not be unjust, Percy; are you not cool and reserved yourself? +How do we know why Caroline is somewhat more so than usual? Poor girl, +we may find excuses for her, but I know no reason why you should treat +her as you do." + +"Her whole conduct demands it. How did she use that noble fellow St. +Eval; encourage him, so that their union was confidently asserted, and +then reject him for no cause whatever; or, if she had a cause, for love +of a villain, who, it appears, in secret, possessed all the favour she +pretended to lavish on St. Eval,--both false and deceiving." + +"Percy, you are determined to be angry with everybody to-day. I +flattered myself my influence had allayed your passion, and behold, it +is only withdrawn from one object to be hurled upon another. Can you not +find some good cause now to turn it from Caroline on me? Is it nothing +that I should dare face the tempest of your wrath, and tell my impetuous +and headstrong brother exactly what I thought--nothing, that I should +have ventured to say there was a thing on earth you dared not do?" + +Percy turned sharply towards him, as if in that moment he could be angry +even with him; but Herbert met his fierce glance with a smile so full of +affectionate interest, that all Percy's displeasure and irritation +seemed at once removed. + +"Displeased with you!" exclaimed Percy, when involuntary admiration had +taken the place of anger, and unconsciously the noble serenity of +Herbert's temper appeared to soothe the more irritable nature of his +own. "Ay, Herbert, when we two have exchanged characters, such may be, +till then I am contented to love and reverence the virtue, the +gentleness I cannot make my own." + +"We are better thus, my brother," replied Herbert, feelingly; "were we +the same, could I have been the happy being you have made me at college? +Much, very much happiness do I owe to your high spirit, Percy. Without +your support, my life, spite of the charms of study, would have been a +painful void at college; and though I feel, you know not perhaps how +often and how bitterly, that in many things I cannot hope to be your +companion, yet to think my affection may sometimes check the violence +that would lead you wrong, oh, that is all I can hope for or desire." + +"Have you not my love, my confidence, my fondest, warmest esteem?" +exclaimed Percy, impetuously, and twining his arm, as in fondness he +often did, around his brother's neck. "Is there one among my gay +companions I love as you, though I appear to seek their society more?" + +Herbert was silent. + +"You do not doubt me, Herbert?" + +"Percy--no!" exclaimed the youth, with unwonted ardour. To speak more at +that moment he could not, and ere words came at his command, the library +door slowly opened, and Caroline languidly entered. + +Herbert somewhat hurriedly left the room, to conceal the agitation the +interview with Percy had occasioned him. + +For some little time Caroline remained in the library, seeking, it +appeared, a book, without a word passing between her and Percy. Both +evidently wished to speak, but neither liked to begin; at length +Caroline approached him. + +"Percy," she began, and her voice trembled sufficiently to prevent more. +Percy was softened. + +"Well, dear Caroline, am I so very terrible you cannot speak to me? I +have been angry and unjust, and you, perhaps, a little too reserved; so +now let us forgive and forget, as we did when we were children, and be +friends for the future." + +He spoke with all his natural frankness, and extended his hand towards +her. Caroline's spirits were so depressed, that the least word or token +of kindness overcame her, and pressing her brother's hand in both hers, +she turned away her head to conceal the quickly-starting tears, and +Percy continued, trying to smile-- + +"Well, Caroline, will you not tell me what you were going to say? I +cannot quite penetrate your thoughts." + +Again Caroline hesitated, but then with an effort she said, fixing her +heavy eyes on her brother's face-- + +"Percy, had you a real cause for writing to my father as you did some +few weeks ago, or was it rumour alone which actuated your doing so? I +implore you to answer me truly." + +"I had all-sufficient cause," he answered, instantly. "It was from no +rumour. Do you think that, without good reason, I would have endeavoured +to traduce the character of any man?" + +"And what was that cause? Why did you implore my father, as he valued my +future peace, not to expose me to his fascinations?" + +Caroline spoke slowly and deliberately, as if every word were weighed +ere it was uttered, but with an expression on her features, as if life +and peace depended on his answer. + +Percy looked earnestly at her. + +"Why should you ask this question, my dear sister?" he said. "If I +answer it, what good will it do? Why should I solve a mystery, that, if +you love this Alphingham, as this extreme depression bids me believe, +must bring but increase of pain?" + +"Percy," replied Caroline, raising her head, and standing with returning +dignity before him, "Percy, do not let the idea of my love bid you +hesitate. Increase of pain I do not think is possible; but yet, do not +mistake me, that pain does not spring from disappointed affection. +Percy, I do not love Lord Alphingham; I have been fascinated, and the +remembrance of the past still clings to me with remorse and suffering; +but I never loved him as, had I not been infatuated and blind, had I not +rejected the counsels and confidence of my mother, I might have loved +another. You know not how I have been led on, how I have permitted +myself to be but a tool in the hands of those whose independence I +admired, and aided them by my own reckless folly--the wish to prove, +however differently I was educated, still I could act with equal spirit. +Had it not been for that self-will, that perverse spirit, I might now +have been a happy and a virtuous wife, loving and esteeming that +superior being, whose affections I wilfully cast away; but that matters +not now," she added, hurriedly. "My mother was right, I was unworthy to +share his lot; but of this rest assured, I do not love, I never have +loved, for I cannot esteem Lord Alphingham." + +"But why then wish to know more concerning him?" Percy said, much +relieved by his sister's words, and more pleased than he chose to +appear by her allusion to St. Eval. "Is it not enough your connection +with him is entirely broken off?" + +"No, Percy; I have rejected him, dissolved our engagement, I scarcely +know wherefore, except that I felt I could not be his without my +father's consent; but there are times I feel as if I had treated him +unjustly, that I have had no cause to think ill of him; my conduct had +encouraged him. To me he has been devoted and respectful, and though I +could not, would not be his wife, yet these thoughts linger on my mind, +and add most painfully to the chaos already there." + +Twice Percy slowly traversed the room, with a countenance on which +anxious thought was deeply imprinted. He paused opposite to Caroline, +took both her hands in his, and spoke in a voice which, though low, was +so solemn that it thrilled to her inmost soul. + +"Caroline, I had hoped the fatal secret made known to me would never +have passed my lips, but for the restoration of your peace it shall be +divulged, nor will the injured one who first intrusted it to me, to +preserve you from ruin, believe I have betrayed her trust. You have not +suspected the whole extent of evil that would have been yours, had you +indeed fled with that hypocritical villain. Caroline, Lord Alphingham is +a married man--his wife still lives!" + +Had a thunderbolt fallen at her feet, or the earth yawned beneath her, +not more pale or transfixed would Caroline have stood than she did as +those unexpected words fell clear and shrill as a trumpet-blast upon her +tortured ear. Amid all her conjectures as to the meaning of Percy's +words, this idea had never crossed her mind; that Alphingham could thus +have deliberately been seeking her ruin, under the guise of love and +honour, was a stretch of villainy that entered not into her conception. +Now that the truth was known, she stood as if suddenly turned to marble, +her cheek, her very lips bearing the colour of death. Then came the +thoughts of the past; had it not been for those recollections of her +childhood, her mother's love, devotion, what would she now have been? In +vain she struggled to bear up against that rushing torrent of thought; +every limb was seized with violent trembling, her brain reeled, and she +would have sunk to the ground, had not Percy, alarmed at the effect of +his words, led her tenderly to a seat, and kneeling by her side, threw +his arms around her. Her head sunk on his shoulder, and she clung to him +as if evil and guilt and wretchedness still hovered like fiends around +her, and he would protect her from them all. Fire again flashed from the +eyes of the young man as he thought on Alphingham, but for her sake he +restrained himself, and endeavoured by a few soothing words to calm her. + +"Tell me all--all you know, I can bear it," she said at length, almost +inaudibly, and looking up with features as deathlike as before. Percy +complied with her request, and briefly related as follows: + +He had become acquainted during his college life, he told her, with a +widow and her daughter, who lived about four or five miles from Oxford. +Some service he had rendered them, of sufficient importance as to make +him an ever welcome and acceptable guest within the precincts of that +cottage, which proclaimed a refined and elevated taste, although its +inmates were not of the highest class. Both Percy fancied were widows, +although he scarcely knew the foundation of that fancy, except the +circumstance of their living together, and the husband of the younger +lady never appearing; nor was his name ever mentioned in the +confidential conversations he sometimes had with them, which the service +he had had in his power to do demanded. Mrs. Amesfort, the daughter, +still possessed great beauty, which a shade of pensive thought, +sometimes amounting to deep melancholy, rendered even more lovely. Her +age might have been six or seven and twenty, she could not have been +more. At an earlier age, there was still evidence that she had been a +sparkling, lively girl, and her mother would frequently relate to the +young man the change that sorrow--and sorrow, she hinted, of a +peculiarly painful nature--had made in one who, ten years previous, had +been so full of life and glee. Decline, slow but sure, it seemed even to +Percy's inexperienced eye, was marked on her pale features; and at those +times when bodily suffering was greatest, her spirit would resume a +portion of its former lightness, as if it rejoiced in the anticipated +release. There was a deep thrilling melody in her voice, whether in +speaking or, when strength allowed, in warbling forth the pathetic airs +of her native land; for Agnes Amesfort was a child of Erin, once +enthusiastic, warm, devoted, as were her countrywomen--possessing +feelings that even beneath that pale, calm exterior would sometimes +burst forth and tinge her cheek, and light up her soul-speaking eye with +momentary but brilliant radiance, and whispered too clearly what she had +once been, and what was now the wreck. + +The gaiety, the frankness, and unassuming manner of Percy rendered him a +most acceptable visitant at Isis Lodge, so the cottage was called; he +was ever ready with some joyous tale, either of Oxford or of the +metropolis, to bring a smile even to the lips of Mrs. Amesfort. It was +not likely that he should so frequently visit the cottage without +exciting the curiosity and risibility of his college companions; but he +was enabled cheerfully and with temper to withstand it all, feeling +secure in his own integrity, and confident that the situation in which +he stood relative to the inmates of that cottage was mutually +understood. Several inquiries Percy made concerning these interesting +females; but no intelligence of their former lives could he obtain; they +had only settled in the cottage a few months previous to the period of +his first acquaintance with them; and whence they came, and who they +were, no one knew nor cared to know. It was enough for the poor for many +miles round, that the assistance of the strangers was extended towards +them, with kind words and consolation in their troubles; and for the +Oxonians, that though they received with extreme and even grateful +politeness the visits made them, they were never returned. + +One little member of this small family Percy had not mentioned, a little +girl, who might have been about eight or nine years old, an interesting +child, whom Percy had saved from a watery grave in the rapid Isis, which +rolled at the base of the grounds; a child, in whom the affections of +her widowed mother were centred with a force and intensity, that it +appeared death itself could but divide; and she was, indeed, one to +love--affectionate, and full of glee; yet the least sign of increased +suffering on the part of her mother would check the wild exuberance of +childish spirits, without diminishing in the least her cheerfulness, and +she would throw her arms around her neck, and fondly ask, if she might +by kisses while away the pain. Many a game of play did she have with her +preserver, whose extreme kindness and excessive liveliness excited the +affections of the child, and increased and preserved the gratitude his +courageous conduct had occasioned in the bosom of that young devoted +mother, whose every earthly joy was centred in her fatherless child. + +It happened that in speaking one day of London society, and of the +reigning belles and beaux of the season, that Percy casually mentioned +the name of Lord Alphingham, whom he declared was by all accounts so +overwhelmed with attentions and flatteries, since his return from a nine +years' residence on the Continent, that there was every chance of his +being thoroughly spoiled, if he were not so already, and losing every +grain of sense, if he had any to lose. He was surprised, as he spoke, at +the very visible agitation of the elder lady, whose colour went and came +so rapidly, that involuntarily he turned towards her daughter, wondering +if any such emotion were visible in her; and though she did not appear +paler than usual, nor was any outward emotion visible, save that her arm +was somewhat tightly bound round the tiny figure of the little Agnes, he +almost started, as he met those large soft eyes fixed full upon him, as +if they would penetrate his soul; and though her voice was calm, +unhesitating, and firm, as she asked him if he were acquainted with Lord +Alphingham, yet its tones sounded even more thrilling, more sadly than +usual. He answered truly in the negative, adding, he was not ambitious +of his acquaintance; as a man, he was not one to suit his fancy. Many +questions did Mrs. Amesfort ask relative to this nobleman, and still +unconsciously her arm held her child more closely to her side. The elder +lady's looks were bent on them both, expressive, it seemed to Percy, of +fondness for those two beloved objects, and struggling with indignation +towards another. Percy returned to college that evening unusually +thoughtful. What could Lord Alphingham have to do with the inhabitants +of that simple cottage? Incoherent fancies occupied his mind, but from +all which presented themselves as solutions to the mystery his pure mind +revolted; and, compelled by an impulse he could not resist, he continued +to speak of Alphingham every time he visited the cottage. Mrs. Amesfort, +it appeared to him, rather encouraging than checking his conversation on +that subject, by introducing it herself, and demanding if his name were +still mentioned in Percy's letters from town. Mrs. Morley, her mother, +ever looked anxiously at her, as if she could have wished the subject +unnamed; but still Alphingham continued to be the theme so constantly +discussed at Isis Lodge, that Percy felt no repugnance in mentioning +those reports which allied his sister's name with that of the Viscount. +Again were the eyes of Mrs. Amesfort fixed intently on his face, and she +spoke but little more during that evening's visit. Percy left her, +unable to account for the deep and serious thought imprinted on her +features, nor the look with which she bade him seek her the following +day at an appointed hour, as she earnestly wished to speak with him +alone. The day passed heavily till he was again with her. She was alone; +and steady determination more than ever marked on her clear and polished +brow. She spoke, and Percy listened, absorbed; she alluded to his +preservation of her child, and, in that moment of reawakened gratitude, +all the enthusiasm of her country spoke in her eyes and voice; and then +a moment she paused, and a bright and apparently painful flush mounted +to those cheeks which Percy had ever seen so pale. She implored his +forbearance with her; his pardon, at what might appear an unwarrantable +interference on her part in the affairs of his family; but his many and +eloquent descriptions of them, particularly of his mother, had caused an +interest that compelled her to reveal a fatal secret which, she had +hoped, would never have passed her lips. Was it a mere rumour, or were +Lord Alphingham's attentions marked and decided towards his sister? +Percy believed there was very good foundation for the rumours he had +heard. + +Did his parents approve of it? she again asked, and the flush of +excitement faded. Percy was not quite sure; he rather thought by his +mother's letters she did not, though Caroline was universally envied as +an object of such profound attention from one so courted and admired. +Did his sister love him?--the words appeared wrung with a violent effort +from Mrs. Amesfort's lips. + +He did not fancy she did as yet; but he doubted not the power of Lord +Alphingham's many fascinations and exclusive devotion to herself, on one +naturally rather susceptible to vanity as was Caroline. + +"Oh, if you love your sister, save her ere it be too late, ere her +affections are engaged," was Mrs. Amesfort's reply, with a burst of +emotion, the more terrible, from its contrast with her general calm and +unmoved demeanour. "Expose her not to those fascinations which I know no +heart can resist. Let her not associate with him--with my husband; he +is not free to love--I am his lawful wife; and the child you saved is +his--his own--the offspring of lawfully-hallowed wedlock; though he has +cast me off, though his eyes have never gazed upon my child, yet, yet we +are his. No cruel words of separation has the law of England spoken. But +do not, oh! if you have any regard for me," she continued, wildly +seizing both Percy's hands, as she marked the dark blood of passion +kindling on the young man's brow, "do not betray him; do not let him +know that his wife--his injured wife--has risen to cry shame upon him, +and banish him from those circles wherein he is formed to mingle. +Promise me faithfully, solemnly, you will not betray my secret more than +is necessary to preserve your sister from misery and ruin. I thought +even for her I could not have spoken thus, but I gazed on my child, and +remembered she too has a mother, whose happiness is centred in her as +mine is in my Agnes, and I could hesitate no more. Promise me you will +not abuse my confidence, Mr. Hamilton, promise me; let me not have the +misery of reproaches from him to whom my fond heart still clings, as it +did at first. Yes; though for nine long weary years I have never seen +his face nor heard his voice, still he knows not, guesses not how his +image dwells within, how faithfully, how fervidly he is still beloved. +Promise me my existence shall not be suspected, that neither he nor any +one shall know the secret of my existence. It is enough for me he lives, +is happy. My child! could I but see her in the station her rank +demands,--but, oh, I would not force her on her father." + +She would still have spoken, still have entreated, but this unwonted +emotion had exhausted her feeble strength. Greatly moved by this +extraordinary disclosure, and struck with that deep devotedness, that +undying love, Percy solemnly pledged his word to preserve her secret. + +"My course will soon be over, my sand run out," she said, after +energetically thanking him for his soothing and relieving words, and in +a tone of such sad, resigned hopelessness, that, irritated as he felt +towards Alphingham, his eye glistened and his lips quivered. "And +wherefore should I dash down his present enjoyment by standing forward +and proclaiming myself his wife? Why should I expose my secret sorrows, +my breaking heart to the inspection of a cold and heartless world, and +draw down on my dying moments his wrath, for the poor satisfaction of +beholding myself recognised as Viscountess Alphingham? Would worldly +honours supply the place of his affection? Oh, no, no! I am better as I +am. The tears of maternal and filial love will hallow my grave; and he, +too, when he knows for his sake, to save him a pang, I have suffered my +heart to break in uncomplaining silence, oh, he too may shed one tear, +bestow a thought on one who loved him to the last!" + +"But your child!" exclaimed Percy, almost involuntarily. + +"Will be happier here, under my mother's care, unconscious of her birth, +than mingling in a dangerous world, without a mother to cherish and +protect her. Her father might neglect, despise her; she might be a bar +to a second and a happier union, and oh, I could not die in peace did I +expose her thus." + +Percy was silent, and when the interview had closed, he bade that +devoted woman farewell, with a saddened and deeply thoughtful brow. + +Lord Alphingham had been a student in Dublin, in the environs of which +city dwelt Mrs. Morley, a widow, and this her only child. At their +cottage he became a constant and devoted guest, and as might have been +expected, his impetuous and headstrong nature became desperately +enamoured of the beautiful and innocent Agnes, then only seventeen. +Spite of his youth, being barely twenty, neither mother nor daughter +could withstand his eloquent solicitations, and a private but sacred +marriage was performed. He quitted college, but still lingered in +Ireland, till a peremptory letter from his father summoned him to +England, to celebrate his coming of age. He left his bride, and the +anguish of parting was certainly at that time mutual. Some few months +Agnes hoped for and looked to his return. Alphingham, then Lord +Amesfort, on his part, was restrained only by the fear of the inveteracy +of his father's disposition from confessing his marriage, and sending +for his wife. Another bride, of rank and wealth, was proposed to him, +and then he confessed the truth. The fury of the old man knew no bounds, +and he swore to disinherit his son, if he did not promise never to +return to his ignoble wife, whom he vowed he never would acknowledge. +Amesfort promised submission, fully intending to remain constant till +his father's death, which failing health proclaimed was not far distant, +and then seek his gentle wife, and introduce her in her proper sphere. +He wrote to this effect, and the boding heart of Agnes sunk at once; in +vain her mother strove to rouse her energies, by alluding to the strain +of his letter, the passionate affection breathing in every line, the +sacred nature of his promise. She felt her doom, and ere her child was +six months old, her feelings, ominous of evil, were fully verified. + +Lord Alphingham lingered some time, and his son found in the society in +which the Viscount took good care he should continually mingle, +attractions weighty enough to banish from his fickle heart all love, and +nearly all recollection of his wife. He found matrimony would be very +inconvenient in the gay circle of which he was a member. All the better +feelings and qualities of his youth fled; beneath the influence of +example and bad companionship his evil ones were called forth and +fostered, and speedily he became the heartless libertine we have seen +him. His letters to the unfortunate Agnes were less and less frequent, +and at length ceased altogether, and the sum transmitted for her use +every year was soon the only proof that he still lived. His residence in +foreign lands, the various names he assumed, baffled all her efforts at +receiving the most distant intelligence concerning him, and Agnes still +lingered in hopeless resignation--"The heart will break, but brokenly +live on;" and thus it was she lived, existing for her child alone. Nine +years they had been parted, and Agnes had ever shrunk in evident pain +from quitting her native land, and the cottage which had been the scene +of her brief months of happiness; but when change of air was pleaded in +behalf of her child, then suffering from lingering fever, when change of +climate was strongly recommended by the physicians, in secret for +herself equally with that of her little girl, she hesitated no longer, +and a throb of mingled pain and pleasure swelled her too fond heart as +her foot pressed the native land of her husband. Some friends of her +mother, unacquainted with her sad story, resided near Oxford, and +thither they bent their steps, and finally fixed their residence, where +Mrs. Amesfort soon had the happiness of beholding her child restored to +perfect health and radiant in beauty; perhaps the faint hope that +Alphingham might one day unconsciously behold his daughter, reconciled +her to this residence in England. She was in his own land; she might +hear of him, of his happiness; and, deeply injured as she was, that +knowledge, to her too warm, too devoted heart was all-sufficient. + +Such were the particulars of the story which Percy concisely yet fully +related in confidence to his sister. Caroline neither moved nor spoke +during his recital; her features still retained their deadly paleness, +and her brother almost involuntarily felt alarmed. A few words she said, +as he ceased, in commentary on his tale, and her voice was calm. Nor did +her step falter as she quitted the library, and returned to her own +room, when, carefully closing the door, she sunk on the nearest seat, +and covering her eyes with her hands, as if to shut out all outward +objects, gave unchecked dominion to the incongruous thoughts occasioned +by Percy's tale. She could not define or banish them; a sudden +oppression appeared cast upon her brain, deadening its powers, and +preventing all relief from tears. The ruin, the wretchedness from which +she had been mercifully preserved stood foremost in her mind, all else +appeared a strange and frightful dream. The wife and child of Alphingham +flitted like mocking phantoms before her eyes, and the countenance of +Alphingham himself glared at her, and his gibing laugh seemed to scream +in her ears, and transform him into a malignant fiend revelling in the +misery he had created. She strove to pray but vainly; no words of such +soothing and consoling import rose to her lips. How long she remained in +this state of wretchedness she knew not, but it was the mild accents of +her mother's voice that roused her from her trance. + +"Are you not well, Caroline? What is the matter, love?" Mrs. Hamilton +asked, alarmed at the icy coldness of her daughter's hand, and kissing, +as she spoke, her pallid cheek. + +Caroline threw her arms round her, and a violent flood of tears relieved +the misery from which she was suffering so painfully. + +"Do not ask me to reveal the cause of this weakness, my dearest mother," +she said, when voice returned. "I shall be better now, and never, never +again shall recollections of the past, by afflicting me, cause you +solicitude. Do not fancy this apparent grief has anything to do with +regret at my late decision, or for still lingering affection; oh, no, +no. Do not look at me so anxiously, mother; I have had a long, long +conversation with Percy, and that has caused the weakness you perceive; +but it will soon pass away, and I shall be your own happy Caroline +again." + +Tears were still stealing from those bloodshot eyes; but she looked up +in Mrs. Hamilton's face with an expression of such confiding affection, +that her mother's anxious fears were calmed. She would not inquire more, +nor question Percy, when he sought her in her boudoir before dinner, to +request that no notice might be taken, if his sister's manner were that +evening less calm than usual. Mrs. Hamilton felt thankful that an +understanding had taken place between her children, whose estrangement +had been a source of severe pain, and she waited trustingly and calmly +for time to do its work on the torn heart and agitated nerves of +Caroline. To Emmeline's extreme delight, preparations for their +departure from London and return to Oakwood were now proceeding in good +earnest. Never did that fair and innocent face look more joyous and +animated, and never had her laugh been more glad and ringing than when +the carriage rolled away from Berkeley Square. Every circumstance of +their journey increased her childlike glee, every town they passed +through an object of interest, and even the pensive features of her +cousin Ellen reflected her unchecked joyousness. They seldom travelled +more than forty miles a day, and consequently it was not till the +evening of the fourth they neared the village, whose inhabitants, clad +in holiday attire, stood at the doors of their houses to receive them, +with silent and respectful yet very evident tokens of joy. The evening +was most lovely; the sun had lost the splendour of its beams, though +clouds of every brilliant hue proclaimed the increased glory which +attended its hour of rest, at times lost behind a richly glowing cloud, +and then bursting forth again and dyeing all nature with a flood of +gold. The river lay calmly sleeping before them, while on its glassy +bosom the heavens cast their radiance, relieved by the shade of the +mighty trees that stood to guard its banks; the rich foliage of the +trees, the superb green of the fields, in some of which the ripening +corn was beginning to stud with gold, the varied flowers gemming the +fertile hedge, the holy calmness of this summer eve, all called forth +the best feelings of the human heart. For a few minutes even Emmeline +was silent, and then her clear silvery voice was heard chanting, as if +by an irresistible impulse, the beautiful hymn of the Tyrolese, so +peculiarly appropriate to the scene. On, on they went, the white walls +of the church peeping through clustering ivy, the old and venerable +rectory next came in sight; a few minutes more, and the heavy gates of +Oakwood were thrown wide to receive them, and the carriages swept along +the well-known entrance. Every tree and shrub, and even flower, were now +looked on by Emmeline and Percy with increased and somewhat boisterous +expressions of delight. + +"Try if you cannot be still a very short time longer, dear Emmeline," +whispered the more restrained Ellen, whose eye had caught a glimpse of +Caroline's countenance, and who perceived in an instant her feelings +were not in unison with Emmeline's. She was right; Caroline could not +feel as did her sister. She was not the same light-hearted, innocent +being she had been when she quitted Oakwood; the appearance of the home +of her childhood vividly recalled all that had occurred since she had +mingled in the world, that world of which she had indulged so many +brilliant visions; and while Entmeline's laugh conveyed gladness in that +hour to all who heard it, Caroline leaned forward to conceal from her +companions the tears that stole silently down her cheek. + +A shout from Percy proclaimed the old hall in sight. A group of +domestics stood on the steps, and the setting sun threw its brilliant +hues on the mansion, as if with increased and unusual lustre that +venerable spot should welcome the return of the Hamilton family within +its sheltering walls. + + + + +CHAPTER IX. + + +"There wants but the guardian spirit of yon old Manor to render this +scene as perfect as her society would bid the present hours roll on in +unalloyed felicity to me," was Herbert Hamilton's observation some +little time after their return to Oakwood, as he stood, arm in arm with +his friend Arthur Myrvin, on the brow of a hill which overlooked, among +other beautiful objects, Greville Manor, now inhabited by strangers. + +Young Myrvin smiled archly, but ere their walk that evening was +concluded, he too had become interested in the being so dear to his +friend; for Herbert spoke in perfect confidence, secure of friendly +sympathy. Oakwood was to him as dear, perhaps even dearer than to +Emmeline, for his nature and tastes were not such as any amusement in +London could gratify. His recreation from the grave studies necessary +for the profession which he had chosen, was to wander forth with a +congenial spirit, and marking Nature in all her varied robes, adore his +Creator in His works as well as in His word. In London his ever active +mind longed intensely to do good, and his benevolent exertions +frequently exceeded his strength; it was his chief delight to seek the +dwellings of the poor, to relieve distress, alleviate affliction. The +prisoner in his cell, the bold and wilful transgressor of the laws of +God, these would he teach, and by gentle admonitions bring nearer to the +Throne of Grace. Yet notwithstanding the gratification which the +pursuits of Herbert gave to his parents, they often felt considerable +anxiety lest his health should suffer from his unceasing efforts, and +they rejoiced on that account when their removal to Oakwood afforded +their son a quieter and more healthful field of occupation. For miles +around Oakwood the name of Herbert Hamilton was never spoken without a +blessing. There he could do good; there he could speak of God, and +behold the fruits of his pious labours; there was Mr. Howard ever ready +to guide and to sympathise, and there was the field of Nature spread +before him to fill his heart with increased and glowing adoration and +reverential love. + +It was well for Herbert his parents were such as could understand and +sympathise in these exalted feelings; had harshness, or even neglect, +been extended over his childhood and his opening youth, happiness, such +as had gilded his life, would never have been his. + +As Emmeline had rejoiced, so also might have Herbert, as they neared the +gates of his home, had there not been one recollection to dim his +happiness. She who had shared in all his pleasures, who had shed a charm +over that spot, a charm which he had never felt so keenly as when he +looked for it, and found it not; the favourite playfellow of his +infancy, the companion of his youth, his plighted bride, she was in far +distant lands, and vainly on his first return home did Herbert struggle +to remove the weight of loneliness resting on his heart; he never +permitted it to be apparent, for to his family he was the same devoted +son and affectionate brother he had ever been, but painfully he felt it. +Mr. Myrvin and his son were now both inmates of Mr. Hamilton's family. +The illegality of the proceedings against the former, in expelling him +from his ministry of Llangwillan, had now been clearly proved, for the +earnestness of Mr. Hamilton permitted no delay; and tears of pious +gratitude chased down the cheeks of the injured man, as he recognised in +the person of his benefactor the brother of the suffering woman whom he +had sheltered, and whose bed of death he had deprived of its sting. The +persuasions of Mr. Hamilton succeeded in conquering his objections to +the plan, and he consented to make Oakwood his home for a short time, +ere he once more settled in his long-loved rectory. + +With Arthur, Ellen speedily resumed her place; the remembrance of that +neglected little girl had never left Mr. Myrvin's mind, and when, +radiant in animation and returning health and happiness, she hastily, +almost impetuously, advanced to meet him, he pressed her to his bosom +with the affection of a father; and even as a daughter Ellen devoted +herself to him during his residence at Oakwood. He had been the first in +England to treat her with kindness; he had soothed her childish sorrow, +and cheered her painful duties; he had been the first since her father's +death to evince interest for her, and though so many years had passed, +that the little girl was fast verging into womanhood, yet such things +were not forgotten, and Ellen endeavoured to prove the gratitude which +time had not effaced. + +Ellen was happy, her health almost entirely restored; but it was +scarcely possible for any observant person to live with her for any +time, without noticing the expression of pensive melancholy, of subdued +spirit, unnatural in one still so very young, that, unless animated by +any casual circumstances, ever rested on her features. Mr. Myrvin soon +noticed this, and rather wondered such should still be, when surrounded +by so much kindness and affection. Her gentleness and controlled temper, +her respectful devotion to her aunt and uncle, were such as to awaken +his warmest regard, and cause him to regret that shade of remaining +sadness so foreign to her age. Traces of emotion were so visible on her +cheeks one day, returning from a walk with Mr. Myrvin, that Mrs. +Hamilton felt convinced the tale of the past had been told, and fearing +her niece had done herself injustice, she scrupled no longer in alluding +to it herself. Mr. Myrvin was deeply affected at the tale, and much +relieved when the whole was known; for when he had praised her general +conduct, and approved of so many feelings and sentiments she had +acknowledged, and then tenderly demanded the cause of that depression he +sometimes witnessed, Ellen had given vent to a violent burst of emotion, +and spoken of a sin, a fearful sin, which long years of probation alone +could wash away. Her strong, her terrible temptation, her extreme +wretchedness and dreadful sufferings she had not mentioned, and, +consequently, when known, an air of even more gentle and more +affectionate interest pervaded Mr. Myrvin's manner towards her. Hearing +her one day express an ardent desire once more to visit Llangwillan, to +see again her mother's grave, he earnestly entreated Mrs. Hamilton's +permission for her to visit him for a few weeks: her company would, he +said, indeed shed joy over his home, and afford much pleasure to a +widowed sister who resided with him. Mrs. Hamilton smilingly consented, +and a flush of animated pleasure dyed Ellen's cheeks at the proposal. +For about a quarter of an hour she was all delight and animation, when +suddenly a thought entered her mind, banishing her unusual mirth, and +filling her eyes with tears. Her voice faltered audibly, as she warmly +thanked Mr. Myrvin and her aunt for their wish to increase her +happiness, but she would rather not leave home that year. The change was +so sudden, her manner so contradictory to her words, that Mrs. Hamilton, +believing some fanciful reason existed, would have insisted on her +compliance, and playfully accused her of unfounded caprice. There was, +however, a degree of earnest entreaty in her manner, that Mr. Myrvin +would not combat, and he expressed himself contented with her promise +for the following year. Mrs. Hamilton was not, however, quite so easily +satisfied. Ellen had been latterly so open with her, that anything like +concealment in her conduct gave her some little uneasiness; but she +could not withstand the imploring look of her niece, as she entreated +her not to think her capricious and wilful; she was sure Mrs. Hamilton +would approve of her reason, did she confess it. + +"I am not quite so sure of that," was her aunt's smiling reply; "but, +however, I will trust you, though I do not like mysteries," and the +subject was dismissed. + +The manners and conversation of Arthur Myrvin were such as to prepossess +both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton very much in his favour, and strengthened the +opinion they had already formed concerning him, on the word of their +son. The respectful deference with which he ever treated Caroline and +Emmeline often caused a laugh at his expense from Percy, but gratified +Mrs. Hamilton; Percy declared he stood as much in awe of his sisters as +if they were the highest ladies in the land. Arthur bore his raillery +with unruffled temper, but he felt the distance that fortune placed +between him and those fair girls, and he hoped, by reserve, to lessen +the danger that might in their society attack his peace. Emmeline +mistook this cautious reserve for coldness and distaste towards women, +and, with the arts of a playful child, she frequently endeavoured to +draw him from his abstraction, and render him a more agreeable +companion. + +There was still so very much of the child in Emmeline, though now +rapidly approaching her eighteenth birthday, she was still so very young +in manners and appearance, that the penetration of Mrs. Hamilton must +not be too severely criticised, if it failed in discovering that +intimately mingled with this childlike manner--the warm enthusiasm of a +kind nature--was a fund of deep reflection, and feelings quite equal to +her age. Mrs. Hamilton fancied the realities of life were still to her a +dream. Had any one spoken to her of the marriage of Emmeline as soon +taking place, she would have started at the idea, as a thing for some +years impossible; and that her affections might become engaged--that the +childlike, innocent, joyous Emmeline, whose gayest pleasures still +consisted in chasing with wild glee the butterflies as they sported on +the summer flowers, or tying garlands of the fairest buds to adorn her +own or her sister's hair, or plucking the apples from the trees and +throwing them to the village children as they sauntered at the orchard +gate--whose graver joys consisted in revelling in every poet that her +mother permitted her to read, or making her harp resound with wild, +sweet melody--whose laugh was still so unchecked and gay--that such a +being could think of love, of that fervid and engrossing passion, which +can turn the playful girl into a thinking woman, Mrs. Hamilton may be +pardoned if she deemed it as yet a thing that could not be; and she, +too, smiled at the playful mischief with which Emmeline would sometimes +claim the attention of young Myrvin, engage him in conversation, and +then, with good-humoured wit and repartee, disagree in all he said, and +compel him to defend his opinions with all the eloquence he possessed. + +With Ellen, young Myrvin was more at his ease; he recalled the days that +were past, and never felt with her the barrier which his sensitive +delicacy had placed between himself and her cousins. Arthur was proud, +more so than he was aware of himself. He would have considered himself +more humbled to love and sue for one raised by fortune or rank above +him, than in uniting with one, who in both these essentials was his +inferior. He was ambitious, but for honours and station obtained by his +own endeavours not conferred by another. From his earliest youth he had +grown up with so strong an impression that he was intended for the +Church, that he considered it impossible any other profession could suit +him better. When he mingled intimately at college with young men of +higher rank and higher hopes, he discovered too late that a clergyman's +life was not such as to render him most happy; but he could not draw +back, he would not so disappoint his father. He felt and knew, to obtain +the summit of his desires, to be placed in a public situation, where his +ambition would have full scope, required a much larger fortune than his +father possessed. He clothed himself in what he believed to be +resignation and contentment, but which was in truth a morbid +sensitiveness to his lot in life, which he imagined poverty would +separate from every other. Association with Herbert Hamilton, to whom in +frankness he confided these secret feelings, did much towards removing +their bitterness; and the admiration which he felt for Herbert, whose +unaffected piety and devotion to the Church he could not fail to +appreciate, partially reconciled his ambitious spirit to his station. +Yet the exalted ideas of Herbert were not entirely shared by Arthur, +whose thoughts were centred in a more stirring field of usefulness than +it would in all probability be his to fill. Herbert combated these +objections with so much eloquence, he pointed with such ardent zeal to +the crown eternal that would be his, when divine love had triumphed over +all earthly ambition, and his duties were done for love of Him, who had +ordained them, that when the time of his ordination came (which it did +very shortly after the commencement of this chapter), he would not have +drawn back, even had a more attractive profession been offered for his +acceptance. The friendship and countenance of Mr. Hamilton did much to +reconcile him to his lot. Mr. Howard's curate died suddenly, at the very +time that Mr. Hamilton was writing to the Marquis of Malvern, in +Arthur's favour, for a vacant living then at his disposal. Both now were +offered to the young man's choice, and Percy, even Mr. Hamilton himself, +were somewhat surprised that, without a moment's hesitation, he accepted +that under Mr. Howard, in the gift of Mr. Hamilton, inferior as it was +in point of worldly prospects to Lord Malvern's. His two parishes were +situated about nine or ten miles from Oakwood, and seven or eight from +Mr. Howard's rectory, and ere Mr. Myrvin returned to Llangwillan, he had +the satisfaction of seeing his son settled comfortably in his curacy, +performing his duties to the approval of his rector, and gaining by his +manner the affection of his parishioners. + +Herbert alone knew to its full extent the conquest his friend had +achieved over himself. His inclination led him to ambitious paths, where +he might in time obtain the notice of and mingle in the highest ranks; +but when the innate nobleness of his mind showed him where his duty lay, +when conscience loudly whispered now was the time to redeem the errors +of his college life, to prove his reverence for his father, to preserve +the kindness of those friends, exalted alike by rank and virtue, with +whom he still might mingle, with a strong effort he banished all +ambitious wishes, and devoted himself heart and soul to his ministerial +duties. + +Herbert would speak of his friend at home, of his self-conquering +struggles, till all would sympathise in the interest he so warmly +displayed, particularly Emmeline, with whom, sportive as she was, +Herbert from his childhood had had more thoughts and feelings in common +than he ever had with Caroline; and now, whether he spoke of Mary +Greville or Arthur Myrvin, in her he ever found a willing and attentive +auditor. Whenever he had ridden over to Hawthorndell, which he +frequently did, Emmeline would always in their next walk playfully draw +from him every particular of the "Lone Hermit," as in true poetic style +she termed Arthur. But there was no seriousness in her converse either +of or to young Myrvin. There was always mischief lurking in her +laughter-loving eye; always some wild joke betrayed in the arch smiles +ever lingering round her mouth; but mischief as it was, apparently the +mere wantonness of childhood, or very early youth, something in that +glance or smile ever bade young Myrvin's heart beat quicker than before, +and every pulse throb with what at first he deemed was pain. It was +relief to him to seek the quiet, gentle Ellen, and speak to her even as +he would to a sister, of all that had occurred to him since last they +met, so secure was he of sympathy in his future prospects, his present +cares and joys. But still that strange feeling lingered within his bosom +in his solitary hours, and he dwelt on it much more than on the gentle +accents of that fair girl whom in his boyhood he had termed his wife; +and stranger still, if it were pain, that it should urge him on to seek +it, that he could not rest till the glance of that eye, the tone of that +voice, had once more been seen and heard, till fresh excitement had been +given to thoughts and emotions which were unconsciously becoming the +mainsprings of his life. + +The undisturbed and happy calmness of Oakwood removed in a great measure +Caroline's painful feelings; all thoughts of Lord Alphingham were +gradually banished. The question how she could ever have been so blind +as to imagine that he had gained her affections, that she loved him, +returned more frequently than she could answer. + +But another vision stood forth to confront the darkened one of the +Viscount, and the contrast heightened the lustre of the former. Why had +she been so mad, so infatuated, as to reject with scorn and pride the +hand and heart of one so noble, so fond, so superior as Eugene St. Eval? +Now that the film had been removed from her eyes, that all the past +appeared in its true colours, that self-will and love of independence +had departed from her, the startling truth burst upon her mind, that +she had loved, truly loved, the very man who of all others would have +been the choice of both her parents--loved, and as his wife, might have +been one of the happiest, the most envied of her sex, had not that +indomitable spirit of coquetry urged her on, and lowered her to become a +very tool in the hands of the artful and designing Annie Grahame. + +Caroline loved; had she doubted the existence of that passion, every +letter from Mary Greville would have confirmed it; for we will not say +it was jealousy she felt, it was more self-condemnation and regret, +heightened at times almost into wretchedness. That St. Eval should so +soon forget her, that he should love again ere six months had passed, +could not fail to be a subject of bitter mortification to one in whose +bosom pride still rested. She would not have thus tormented herself with +turning and twisting Mary's information into such ideas, had she not +felt assured that he had penetrated her weakness, and despised her. +Fickleness was no part of St. Eval's character, of that she was +convinced; but it was natural he should cease to love, when he had +ceased to esteem, and in the society and charms of Louisa Manvers +endeavour to forget his disappointment. + +Through Emmeline's introductory letter, Lord St. Eval had become +sufficiently intimate with Mrs. Greville and Mary as to succeed in his +persuasions for them to leave their present residence, and occupy a +vacant villa on Lago Guardia, within a brief walk of Lord Delmont's, +feeling sure that an intimacy between Mrs. Manvers's family and that of +Mrs. Greville would be mutually pleasurable and beneficial; his friendly +wishes succeeded. Mrs. Greville found an able and sympathising +companion in the goodhearted, homely mother of the elegant and +accomplished Lord Delmont, and Mary's sadness was at once soothed and +cheered by the more animated Louisa, whose lot in life had never known +those murky clouds of sorrow and anxiety which had so often dimmed the +youth of Mary. The brother of Louisa had been all in all to her. She +felt as if life could not have another charm, as if not another joy was +wanting to render her lot perfect, until that other charm appeared, and +her ardent fancy quickly knew to its full extent the delights of female +companionship and sympathy. Their very dissimilitude of disposition +rendered dearer the ties of youthful friendship, and Emmeline sometimes +felt a pang of jealousy, as she read in the letters of her friend the +constant praises of Louisa Manvers, not that any diminution of early +affection breathed in them. Mary ever wrote so as to satisfy the most +exacting disposition; but it required all Mrs. Hamilton's eloquence to +persuade Emmeline she should rather rejoice than grieve that Mary had +found some one to supply her place. But vainly Emmeline tried in +playfulness to infect her brother Herbert with a portion of her +jealousy, for she knew not the contents of those letters Mary ever wrote +to Herbert, or she would not for one moment have imagined that either +Lord Delmont or St. Eval would usurp her brother's place. + +"Few things would give me greater pleasure," one of Mary's letters said, +"than to see the union of Lord St. Eval and my fair friend. It appears +to me strange that each, with affections disengaged, can remain blind to +the fascination of the other. They are well suited in every respect, +and I should fancy their union would certainly be a fair promise of +happiness. I live in hope, though as yet, I must confess, hope has but +very little to feed on." + +St. Eval still lingered at Monte Rosa, and it was well for the +inhabitants he did, for an event occurred which plunged that happy +valley from joy and gaiety into wailing and affliction, and even for a +brief interval infected the inhabitants of Oakwood with its gloom. Death +came, and tore away as his victim the widow's son, the orphan's brother. +The title of Delmont became extinct, for the last scion of that ancient +race had gone to his last home. He had gone with St. Eval and some other +young men on a fishing expedition, at some distance; a sudden squall had +arisen, and dispersing with much damage the little flotilla, compelled +the crews of each to seek their own safety. The sails of St. Eval's boat +were not furled quickly enough to escape the danger; it upset, and +though, after much buffeting and struggling with the angry waters, St. +Eval succeeded in bearing his insensible friend to land, his +constitution had received too great a shock, and he lingered but a few +brief weeks ere he was released from suffering. He had been thrown with +violence against a rock, producing a concussion of the brain, which, +combined with the length of time he was under water, produced fever, and +finally death. + +On the agony of the bereaved mother and sister it would be useless to +linger. St. Eval forgot his individual sorrows, and devoted himself, +heart and soul, in relieving those helpless sufferers, in which painful +task he was ably seconded by Mary and her mother, whose letters to their +friends at Oakwood, in that season of affliction, spoke of him in a +manner that, unconsciously to themselves, confirmed every miserable +suspicion in Caroline's mind, and even excited some such feeling in her +parents, whose disappointment was thus vividly recalled. That he should +ever seek their child again they deemed impossible, as did Caroline +herself; but still it was in vain they endeavoured to look with any +degree of pleasure to his union with another. + +Mr. Hamilton's family mourned Lord Delmont's early fate with sincere +regret, though they had known but little of him; but about this time the +thoughts of Mrs. Hamilton were turned in another direction, by a +circumstance which caused unaffected sorrow in her daughter and niece; +nor were she and her husband exempt. Lucy Harcourt had been so many +years a member of the family, she had been so associated from their +infancy in the affections of her pupils, that to part from her was the +bitterest pang of sorrow that Emmeline had yet known, and it was long +before Mrs. Hamilton herself could be reconciled to the idea of +separation; she had ever regarded and treated Miss Harcourt as a sister, +and intended that even when her family were settled, she should never +want another home. It was not only her own virtues that had endeared her +to Mrs. Hamilton; the services she had rendered her children, her active +and judicious share in the arduous task of education, demanded and +received from both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton the meed of gratitude and +esteem, and never once, in the seventeen years of Miss Harcourt's +residence amongst them, had they regretted the impulse which had offered +her a sheltering home and sympathising friends. + +Emmeline and Ellen were still her pupils, and Mrs. Hamilton intended +them to remain so for two or three years longer, even after they were +introduced, and it was on that account Miss Harcourt hesitated in +complying with the earnest entreaty of him whose happy home in her early +youth she had so nobly quitted, preferring to live by her own exertions +than to share the home of the man she loved, when he was married to +another. + +It had been very, very long ere disappointed affection had permitted her +to be cheerful. Her cousin, while rejoicing in the happy home she had +found, while congratulating her with fraternal interest on the kind +friends her mother's virtues had procured her, imagined not the agony +she was striving to conquer, the devoted love for him which disturbed +the peace around her, which otherwise she might have enjoyed to its full +extent; but she did conquer at length. That complete separation from him +did much towards restoring peace although perhaps love might still have +lingered; for what absence, what distance can change a woman's heart? +Yet it interfered no longer with happiness, and she answered Seymour's +constant and affectionate letters in his own style, as a sister would +have done. + +Sixteen years had passed, and not once had the cousins met. Womanhood in +its maturity was now Lucy's; every girlish feeling had fled, and she +perhaps thought young affections had gone also, but her cheek flushed +and every pulse throbbed, when she opened a long, long expected letter, +and found her cousin was a widower in declining health, which precluded +him from attending to his two motherless girls, imploring her, as her +duties in Mrs. Hamilton's family were nearly over, to leave England and +be the guardian spirit of his home, to comfort his affliction, to soothe +his bodily suffering, and learn to know and love his children, ere they +were fatherless as well as motherless, and deprived of every friend save +the aunt Lucy they had been taught to love, although to them unknown. +The spirit of deep melancholy breathing through this epistle called +forth for a few minutes a burst of tears from her who for so many years +had checked all selfish grief. + +"If I can comfort him, teach his children to love me, and be their +mother now they are orphans, oh, I shall not have lived in vain." Such +were the words that escaped her lips as she ceased to weep, and sat a +few minutes in thought, then sought Mrs. Hamilton and imparted all to +her. Mrs. Hamilton hesitated not a moment in her decision. Her own +regret at parting with her friend interfered not an instant with the +measure she believed would so greatly tend to the happiness of Miss +Harcourt. Mr. Hamilton seconded her; but the sorrow at separation, which +was very visible in the midst of their exertions for her welfare, both +gratified and affected Lucy. Never had she imagined how dear she was to +her pupils till the time of separation came; and when she quitted +England, it was with a heart swelling with interest and affection for +those she had left, and the fervent prayer that they might meet again. + +Mr. Seymour had said, were it not for his declining health, which +forbade the exertion of travelling, he would have come for her himself; +but if she would only consent to his proposal, if she could resign such +kind friends to devote herself to an irritable and ailing man, he would +send one under whose escort she might safely travel. Miss Harcourt +declined that offer, for Mr. Hamilton and Percy had both declared their +intention of accompanying her as far as Paris, and thence to Geneva, +where Mr. Seymour resided. + +It was long ere Mr. Hamilton's family became reconciled to this change; +Oakwood appeared so strange without the kind, the gentle Miss Harcourt, +whose steady yet mild firmness had so ably assisted Mrs. Hamilton in the +rearing of her now blooming and virtuous family. It required some +exertion, not only in Emmeline but in Ellen, to pursue their studies +with any perseverance, now that the dear friend who had directed and +encouraged them had departed. Ellen's grateful affection had the last +few years been returned with equal warmth; that prejudice which had at +first characterised Miss Harcourt's feelings towards her had entirely +vanished during her sufferings, and a few days before her departure, +Lucy with much feeling had admitted the uncalled for harshness with +which she too had treated her in her months of misery, and playfully yet +earnestly asked her forgiveness. They were alone, and Ellen's only +answer had been to throw herself on her friend's neck and weep. + +Before Christmas came, however, these painful feelings had been +conquered. Pleasing letters from Miss Harcourt arrived by almost every +post for one or other of the inmates of Oakwood, and their contents +breathing her own happiness, and the warmest, most affectionate interest +in the dear ones she had left, satisfied even Emmeline, from whom a +fortnight's visit from the Earl and Countess of Elmore had banished all +remaining trace of sadness. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton had welcomed but very +few resident visitors to Oakwood during the early years of their +children, but now it was with pleasure they exercised the hospitality so +naturally their own, and received in their own domains the visits of +their most intimate friends of London; but these visits afford us no +matter of entertainment, nor enter much into the purpose of this +history. A large party was never collected within the walls of Oakwood; +the intimate friends of Mr. Hamilton were but few, for it was only those +who thought on the essentials of life as himself with whom he mingled in +the familiar position of host. The Marquis of Malvern's family alone +remained to spend Christmas with them, and added much to the enjoyment +of that domestic circle. Their feelings and pursuits were in common, for +the Marchioness of Malvern was a mother after Mrs. Hamilton's own stamp, +and her children had benefited by similar principles; the same +confidence existed between them. The Marchioness had contrived to win +both the reverence and affection of her large family, though +circumstances had prevented her devoting as much of her own time and +care on their education as had Mrs. Hamilton. Her eldest daughter was +married; her second, some few years older than Caroline, was then +staying with her, and only one of the three who accompanied her to +Oakwood was as yet introduced. Lady Florence was to make her _dĂ©but_ the +following season, with Emmeline Hamilton; and Lady Emily was still, when +at home, under the superintendence of a governess and masters. Lord +Louis, the Marchioness's youngest child, a fine lad of sixteen, with his +tutor, by Mr. Hamilton's earnest desire, also joined their happy party, +and by his light-hearted humour and fun, added not a little to the +amusements of the evening. But it was Lady Gertrude, the eldest of the +three sisters then at Oakwood, that Mrs. Hamilton earnestly hoped might +take the place Annie Grahame had once occupied in Caroline's affections. +Hers was a character much resembling her brother's St. Eval, to whom her +features also bore a striking resemblance. She might, at a first +introduction, have been pronounced proud, but, as is often the case, +reserve was mistaken for pride. Yet in her domestic circle she was ever +the gayest, and the first to contribute to general amusement. In +childhood she had stood in a degree alone, for her elder sisters were +four or five years older than herself, and Florence and Emily four and +five years younger. She had learned from the first to seek no sympathy, +and her strong feeling might perhaps by being constantly smothered, at +length have perished within her, and left her the cold unloving +character she appeared to the world, had it not been for the devoted +affection of her brother Eugene, in whom she soon learned to confide +every emotion as it rose, at that age when girls first become sensible +that they are thinking and feeling beings. They quickly became sensible +that in almost every point they were kindred souls, and the name of +Eugene and Gertrude were ever heard together in their family. Their +affection was at length a proverb among their brothers and sisters, and +perhaps it was this great similarity of disposition and the regard felt +for her noble brother, that first endeared Gertrude to Mrs. Hamilton, +whose wishes with regard to her and Caroline promised fulfilment. Some +chord of sympathy had been struck within them, and they were very soon +attached companions, although at first Lady Gertrude had hesitated, for +she could not forget the tale of scornfully-rejected love imparted to +her by her brother. She had marked the conduct of Caroline from the +beginning. She too had hoped that in her she might have welcomed a +sister, although her observant eye had marked some defects in her +character which the ardent St. Eval had not perceived. Coolness during +the past season had subsisted between them, for Caroline had taken no +trouble to conquer Lady Gertrude's reserve, and the latter was too proud +to make advances. In vain Lord St. Eval had wished a better +understanding should exist between them, while Caroline was under the +influence of Miss Grahame, it was impossible for her to associate in +sympathy with Lady Gertrude Lyle; yet now that they mingled in the +intimacy of home, now the true character of Caroline was apparent, that +Lady Gertrude had time and opportunity to remark her devotion to her +parents, more particularly to her mother, her affectionate kindness to +her brothers and Emmeline and Ellen, her very many sterling virtues, +which had previously been concealed, but which were discovered by the +tributes of grateful affection constantly offered to her by the +inhabitants of the village, by the testimony of Mr. Howard, the +self-conquests of temper and inclination for the sake of others, which +the penetrating eye of Lady Gertrude discovered, and, above all, the +spirit of piety and meekness which now characterised her actions, all +bade the sister of St. Eval reproach herself for condemning without +sufficient evidence. For her conduct to her brother there was indeed no +excuse, and on that subject alone, with regard to Caroline, Lady +Gertrude felt bewildered, and utterly unable to comprehend her. It was a +subject on which neither chose to speak, for it was a point of delicacy +to both. Had Lady Gertrude been excluded from her brother's confidence, +she too might have spoken as carelessly and admiringly of him as his +sisters constantly did; but she could not so address the girl who had +rejected him, it would be pleading his cause, from which she revolted +with a repugnance natural to her high-minded character. + +"If he still love her, as his letters would betray, let him come and +plead his own cause; never will I say anything that can make Caroline +believe I am in secret negotiating for him." Such was the thought that +ever checked her, when about to speak of him in the common course of +conversation, and baffled all Caroline's secret wishes that she would +speak in his praise as her sisters and Lord Louis so constantly did. + +But even as delicacy prevented all allusion to him from the lips of Lady +Gertrude, so it actuated Caroline with perhaps even greater force. Would +she betray herself, and confess that she repented her rejection of St. +Eval? would she by word or deed betray that, would he return to her, she +would be his own, and feel blessed in his affections? She shrunk almost +in horror from doing so, and roused her every energy to conceal and +subdue every emotion, till she could hear his name with composure. Yet +more than once had Lady Gertrude, as she silently watched her +countenance, fancied she perceived sufficient evidence to bid her wonder +what could have induced Caroline's past conduct, to imagine that if St. +Eval could forget that, he might be happy yet; and for his sake, +conquering her scruples, once she spoke openly of him, when she and +Caroline were visiting some poor cottagers alone. She spoke of his +character, many points of which, though she admired, she regretted, as +rendering him less susceptible of happiness than many who were less +gifted. "Unless he find a wife to love him as he loves--one who will +devote herself to him alone, regardless of rank or fortune, Eugene never +can be happy; and if he pass through life, unblest by the dearest and +nearest ties, he will be miserable." So much she did say, and added her +earnest wishes for his welfare, in a tone that caused the tears to +spring to the eyes of her companion, who permitted her to speak for some +time without in any way replying. + +"What a pity you are his sister," she replied, rallying all her energies +to speak frankly and somewhat sportively; "a woman like yourself is +alone worthy of Lord St. Eval." + +"You are wrong," replied Lady Gertrude, sadly; "I am much too cold and +reserved to form, as a wife, the happiness of such a character as my +brother's. We have grown together from childhood, we have associated +more intimately and affectionately with each other than with any other +members of our family, and therefore Eugene knows and loves me. The wife +of St. Eval should be of a disposition as ingenuous and open as his is +reserved; her affection, her sympathy, must make his felicity. He is +grave--too grave; she should be playful, but not childish. Even if she +have some faults, with the love for which my brother pines, the +ingenuousness unsullied by the most trifling artifice, her very faults +would bind her more closely to him." + +Caroline was silent, and Lady Gertrude soon after changed the subject. +Had she heard no reports of Caroline's preference of Lord Alphingham, of +the affair which had somewhat hurried Mr. Hamilton's departure from +London, that conversation would have confirmed her suspicions, that her +brother was no subject of indifference to Caroline. She longed for her +to be candid with her, to hear the whole truth from her own lips. The +happiness of the young Earl was so dear to her, that she would have done +much, very much to secure it; yet so far she could not force herself to +go, particularly as he had given her no charge to do so. She little knew +that Caroline would have given worlds, had they been at her disposal, to +have confided all to her: her repentance, her folly, her earnest prayers +for amendment, to become at length worthy of St. Eval. Caroline loved, +truly loved, because she esteemed, Lady Gertrude; her friendship for her +differed as much from that she believed she had felt for Annie Grahame, +as her regard for St. Eval was unlike that which Lord Alphingham had +originated. Once, the superiority of Lady Gertrude's character would +have rendered her an object of almost dislike to Caroline, as possessing +virtues she admired but would not imitate. Now those virtues were +appreciated, her own inferiority was felt more painfully; and while +associating with her, the recollections of the past returned more than +ever, embittered by remorse. Sir George Wilmot and Lilla Grahame were +also guests at Oakwood. The former declared he had seldom anchored in +moorings so congenial to his taste. In Lilla the effects of happiness +and judicious treatment were already distinctly visible. The young men +spent the Christmas recess at home, and added much to the hilarity of +their domestic circle; nor must we forget Arthur Myrvin, who spent as +much of his time at Oakwood, as his duties permitted; the friendship of +Herbert Hamilton doing much to remove the bitter feelings which often +still possessed him. He would at first have shunned the invitation, but +vainly he strove to do so; for there was one fair object there who held +him with an iron chain, which excited while bound him. He could not +break it asunder, though peace he felt was flying from his grasp. + + + + +CHAPTER X. + + +"Gertrude's letters this morning have brought her some extraordinarily +agreeable tidings," exclaimed Lady Florence Lyle, gaily, as her sister +entered the breakfast-room, rather later than usual. + +"On my honour, her countenance is rather a clearer index than usual +to-day," observed the Marquis, laughing. "Well, Gertrude, what is it?" + +"News from Eugene," exclaimed Lady Emily and Lord Louis in a breath; "he +is going to be married. Either Miss Manvers or Miss Greville have +consented to take him for better or worse," added Lord Louis, laughing. +"Gertrude, allow me to congratulate you on the gift of a new sister, +who, as the wife of my right honourable brother the Earl of St. Eval, +will be dearer to you than any other bearing the same relationship." + +"Reserve your congratulations, Louis, till they are needed," replied +Lady Gertrude, fixing her eyes steadily on Caroline's face, which was +rapidly changing from pale to crimson. + +"I have no such exciting news to communicate," she added, very quietly. +"Eugene is in England, and alone." + +"In England!" repeated Percy, starting up; "I am delighted to hear it. +I just know enough of him to wish most ardently to know more. Will he +not join us? He surely will not winter at Castle Malvern alone, like a +hermit, surrounded by snows; if he do, he is a bachelor confirmed: not a +hope for his restoration to the congenial warmth of life." + +"He has no such intention," replied Lady Gertrude, smiling; "our present +happy circle has too many attractions to permit his resting quietly in +solitude, and, with Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton's kind permission, will join +us here by Christmas Eve." + +"There are few whom we shall be so pleased to welcome as my noble young +friend St. Eval," answered Mr. Hamilton, instantly; "few whose society I +so much prize, both for myself and my sons." + +"And the minstrel's harp shall sleep no more, but wake her boldest +chords to welcome such a guest to Oakwood's aged walls," exclaimed +Emmeline, gaily. + +"Thus I give you leave to welcome him, but if he take my place with you +in our evening walks, I shall wish him back again at Monte Rosa in a +twinkling," observed Lord Louis, in the same gay tone, and looking +archly at his fair companion; "when Eugene appears my reign is always +over." + +"Louis, I shall put you under the command of Sir George Wilmot," said +his father, laughing, however, with the rest of the circle. + +"Ay, ay, do; the sea is just the berth for such youngsters as these," +remarked the old Admiral, clapping his hand kindly on the lad's +shoulder. + +While such _badinage_ was passing, serious thoughts were occupying the +minds of more than one individual of that circle. It would be difficult +to define the feelings of Caroline as she heard that St. Eval was in +England, and coming to Oakwood. Had he so soon conquered his affections, +that he could associate with lier on terms of friendly intimacy? She +longed to confess to her mother her many conflicting feelings; she felt +that her earnest prayers were her own, but shame prevented all +disclosure. She could not admit she now loved that very man whom she had +once treated with such contempt and scorn, rejected with proud +indifference. Even her mother, her fond mother, would say her present +feelings were a just punishment for the past; and that she could not +bear. Inwardly she resolved that not a word should pass her lips; she +would suffer unshrinkingly, and in silence. + +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, and the Marquis and Marchioness of Malvern also +became engrossed with the same subject; the latter had seen and highly +approved of their son's attentions to Caroline, and appeared gratified +by the manner in which she accepted them. Disappointment and indignation +for a time succeeded the young Earl's departure for the Continent, but +the friendship so long subsisting between the families prevented all +unpleasant feeling, except, perhaps, a little towards Caroline herself. +They gladly welcomed the intelligence that St. Eval was in England, and +wished to join them at Oakwood, for they hailed it as a sign that his +fancy had been but fleeting, and was now entirely conquered. Mr. and +Mrs. Hamilton thought the same, though to them it was far more a matter +of disappointment than rejoicing; but hope mingled almost unconsciously +with regret, and they too were pleased that he was about to become their +guest. + +Lady Gertrude's eyes were more than once during that morning fixed on +Caroline, as the subject of St. Eval's travels and residence abroad were +discussed, but she was silent; whatever were her secret reflections, +they were confined within the recesses of her own heart. + +Lord St. Eval came, and with him fresh enjoyment for Percy and Herbert; +and even for young Myrvin, who found nothing in the society of the young +nobleman to wound his pride by recalling to his mind his own inferior +rank. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton fancied they had read his character before; +but their previous intimacy had not discovered those many pleasing +qualifications which domestic amusements and occupations betrayed. Much +of his reserve was now banished; his manners were as easy and as free +from pride or hauteur as his conversation, though chaste and +intellectual, was from pedantry. To all the individuals of that happy +circle he was the same; as kind and as gay to Emmeline and Ellen as to +his own sisters; there might, perhaps, have been a degree of reserve in +his demeanour towards Caroline, but that, except to those principally +concerned, might not have been remarked, for his intercourse with her +was even more general than with others. Emmeline and Ellen, or even +Lilla, was often his selected companion for a walk, but such an +invitation never extended to Caroline, and yet he could never be said +either to neglect or shun her; and she shrinking from attracting his +notice as much as she had once before courted it, an impassable yet +invisible barrier seemed to exist between them. In St. Eval's manner, +his mother and Lady Gertrude read that his feelings were not conquered; +that he was struggling to subdue them, and putting their subjection to +the proof; but Caroline and her parents imagined, and with bitter pain, +that much as he had once esteemed and loved her, a feeling of +indifference now possessed him. + +Herbert found pleasure in the society of the young Earl, for St. Eval +had penetrated the secret of his and Mary's love; though with innate +delicacy he refrained from noticing it farther than constantly to make +Mary his theme during his walks with Herbert, and speaking of her +continually to the family, warming the heart of Emmeline yet more in his +favour, by his sincere admiration of her friend. He gave an excellent +account of her health, which she had desired him to assure her friends +the air of Italy had quite restored. He spoke in warm admiration of her +enthusiasm, her love of nature, of all which called forth the more +exalting feelings; of her unaffected goodness, which had rendered her a +favourite, spite of her being a foreigner and a Protestant, throughout +the whole hamlet of Monte Rosa, and as he thus spoke, the anxious eye of +Mrs. Hamilton ever rested on her Herbert, who could read in that glance +how true and fond was the sympathy, which not once since he had confided +in her his happiness, had he regretted that he had sought. + +The remaining period of the Marquis of Malvern's sojourn at Oakwood +passed rapidly away without any event of sufficient importance to find a +place in these pages. They left Oakwood at the latter end of January for +St. Eval's beautiful estate in Cornwall, where they intended to remain a +month ere they went to London, about the same time as Mr. Hamilton's +family. That month was a quiet one at Oakwood; all their guests had +departed, and, except occasional visits from Arthur Myrvin and St. +Eval, their solitude was uninterrupted. + +St. Eval's estate was situated a few miles inland from the banks of the +Tamar, one of the most beautiful spots bordering that most beautiful +river. He was wont leisurely to sail down the stream to Plymouth, and +thence to Oakwood, declaring the distance was a mere trifle; but +nevertheless it was sufficiently long for Mr. Hamilton sometimes to +marvel at the taste of his noble friend, which led him often twice and +regularly once a week to spend a few hours, never more, at Oakwood, when +he knew they should so soon meet in London. St. Eval did not solve the +mystery, but continued his visits, bringing cheerfulness and pleasure +whenever he appeared, and bidding hope glow unconsciously in each +parent's heart, though had they looked for its foundation, they would +have found nothing in the young Earl's manner to justify its +encouragement. + +In March Mr. Hamilton's family once more sought their residence in +Berkeley Square, about a week after the Marquis of Malvern's arrival; +and this season, the feelings of the sisters, relative to the gaieties +in which they were now both to mingle, were more equal. The bright hues +with which Caroline had before regarded them had faded--too soon and too +painfully, indeed. + +She had been deceived, and in that word, when applied to a young, +aspiring, trusting mind, what anguish does it not comprise. True, she +deserved her chastisement, not only that she had acted the part of a +deceiver to one who trusted her far more than she had done Lord +Alphingham, but wilfully she had blinded herself to her own feelings, +that she might prove her independence; yet these facts lessened not the +bitterness of feeling which was now often hers. But she did not +relinquish society; the dread of encountering Lord Alphingham was not +strong enough to overcome her secret wish that, by her conduct in +society, she might prove to St. Eval that, although unworthy to be +selected as his wife, she would yet endeavour to regain his esteem. She +had resolved to think less of herself and more of others, and thus +become more amiable in their sight, and not feel so many mortifications, +as by her constant desire for universal homage, she had previously +endured. She knew the task was difficult so to conquer herself, and +doubting her own strength, was led to seek it where alone it could be +found. To none did she confess these secret feelings and determination; +calmly and steadily she looked forward, and so successfully had she +schooled herself to submission, that no word or sign as yet betrayed to +her parents the real state of her affections. + +Emmeline's dislike to London had abated as much as had her sister's +glowing anticipations. They were now only to be four months in the +metropolis; the strict routine of masters, etc., was at an end, and she +was to accompany Mrs. Hamilton whenever she went out. She left Oakwood +with regret, and the society and conversation of Arthur Myrvin were +missed more often in London than she chose to confess, but enjoyment was +ever found for Emmeline--life was still a romance to her. In the society +of London, as in the cottages of Oakwood, she was beloved, and she was +happy; but those of the opposite sex, much as they thronged around her, +had no more thought of demanding such a being in marriage, than she had +of what is termed making conquests. It was therefore with feelings of +much less anxiety Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton mingled in society this season, +for the conduct of both their daughters was such as to afford them +satisfaction. + +Some changes had taken place in many of the personages with whom we are +acquainted, since the last time we beheld them. Short and evanescent is +fashionable popularity. Lord Alphingham's reign might be, in a degree, +considered over. Some rumours had been floating over the town at that +time of the year when, in all probability, he thought himself most +secure, that is, when London society is dispersed; rumours which had the +effect of excluding him from most of those circles in which Mr. +Hamilton's family mingled, and withdrawing from him in a great measure +the friendship of Montrose Grahame, who, the soul of honour himself, +shrunk from any connection with one whose reputation the faintest breath +had stained. Yet still there were many who regarded these rumours as the +mere whisperings of envy, and with them he was as much a favourite as +ever. Amongst these was Annie Grahame, whose marked preference more than +atoned to the Viscount for her father's coldness. In vain Grahame +commanded that his daughter should change her manner towards him. She, +who had prevailed on a daughter to disobey this very mandate from the +lips of an indulgent parent, was not likely to regard that of the father +whose sternness and often uncalled-for severity had completely alienated +her affections, and Lord Alphingham had now another urgent reason to +flatter Annie's vanity and make her his own. + +A distant relation and godmother of Lady Helen Grahame had, most +unexpectedly, left her at her death sole heiress to a handsome fortune, +which was to descend undivided to her elder daughter, and thus to +Annie's other attractions was now added that all-omnipotent charm, the +knowledge that she was an heiress, not perhaps to any very large +property, but quite sufficient to most agreeably enlarge the fortune of +any gentleman who would venture to take her for better or worse. One +would have supposed that now every wish of this aspiring young lady was +gratified; but no. It mattered not, though crowds were at her feet, that +when they met, which was very seldom, even Caroline was no longer her +rival, all the affection she possessed was lavished without scruple on +Lord Alphingham, and every thought was turned, every effort directed +towards the accomplishment of that one design. So deeply engrossed was +she in this resolution, that she had no time nor thought to annoy +Caroline, as she had intended, except in exercising to its full extent +her power over Lord Alphingham whenever she was present, in which the +Viscount's own irritated feelings towards her ably assisted. Caroline +felt the truth of her mother's words, that Lord Alphingham, indeed, had +never honourably loved her; that Annie's conduct justified Mrs. +Hamilton's prejudice, and as her heart shrunk in sadness from the +retrospection of these, truths, it swelled in yet warmer affection, not +only towards her fond and watchful mother, but towards the friends that +mother's judicious choice selected and approved. + +Cecil Grahame had been continually in the habit of drawing upon his +mother's cash for the indulgence of his extravagant pleasures, and Lady +Helen had thoughtlessly satisfied all his wishes, without being in the +least aware of the evil propensities she was thus encouraging. It was +not till Cecil was about to leave Eton for the University, that she was +at all startled at the amount of his debts, and then her principal alarm +arose more from the dread of her husband's anger towards her son, if he +discovered the fact, than from any maternal anxiety for Cecil's unsteady +principles. Her only wish was to pay off these numerous debts, without +disclosing them to the husband she so weakly dreaded. How could she +obtain so large a sum, even from her own banker, and thus apply it, +without his knowledge and assistance? The very anticipation of so much +trouble terrified her almost into a fit of illness; and rather than +exert her energies or expose her son to his father's wrath, she would +descend to deceit, and implore his assistance in obtaining the whole +amount, on pretence that she required it for the payment of her own +expenses and debts of honour. She imagined that she had sunk too low in +her husband's esteem to sink much lower; and therefore, if her requiring +money to discharge debts of honour exposed her yet more to his contempt, +it was not of much consequence; besides if it were, she could not help +it, a phrase with which Lady Helen ever contrived to silence the rebukes +of conscience when they troubled her, which, however, was not often. + +She acted accordingly; but as she met the glance of her husband, a +glance in which sadness triumphed over severity, she was tempted to +throw herself at his feet, and beseech him not to imagine her the +dissipated woman her words betrayed, for Lady Helen loved her husband as +much as such a nature could love; but, of all things, she hated a scene, +and though every limb trembled with emotion, she permitted him to leave +her, stung almost to madness by the disclosure her request implied. Did +she play? was that fatal propensity added to her numerous other errors? +and yet never had anything fallen under his eye to prove that she did. +And what debts had she contracted to demand such a sum? Grahame felt she +had deceived him; that the money had never been expended on herself; but +he would not torture himself by demanding a true and full disclosure. +The conduct of his children had ever grieved him, and fearing too justly +the request of his wife related to them, madly and despairingly he +closed his eyes and his lips, thus probably encouraging an evil which he +might have prevented. He delivered the stated sum, and that same day +made over to his wife's own unchecked disposal the whole of that fortune +which, when first inherited, she had voluntarily placed in his hands as +trustee for herself and for her daughter, to whom it would descend. +Briefly he resigned the office she had entreated him to take, sternly +observing, that Annie had better moderate her expectations, as, did Lady +Helen frequently incur such heavy debts, not much was likely to descend +to her daughter. It was a great deal too much trouble for Lady Helen to +expostulate, and if any feeling predominated to conquer the pang +occasioned by Grahame's determination, it was relief, that she might now +assist Cecil, if he should require it, without applying to his father. + +Montrose Grahame was naturally not only an excellent but a judicious +man; but to a great extent, his judgment had deserted him when he +selected Lady Helen as his wife. Had he been united to a woman in whose +judgment and firmness he could confide, he would have been quite as much +respected and beloved in his family as were Mr. Hamilton and the Marquis +of Malvern in theirs; but now neither respect nor affection was +extended towards him, except, perhaps, by Lilla, and unconsciously by +Lady Helen. Severity constantly indulged, was degenerating into +moroseness; and feelings continually controlled, giving place to +coldness and distrust. It was fortunate for Lilla's happiness and, as it +afterwards proved, for her father's, that she was now under the kindly +care of Mrs. Douglas, for constantly irritated with his elder girl, who, +it must be owned, gave him abundant cause, that irritation and suspicion +would undoubtedly have extended towards his younger, and at once have +destroyed the gentleness and amiability which Mrs. Douglas was so +carefully and tenderly fostering. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton saw this change, +and regretted it; but their influence, powerful as it was, could be of +no avail in counteracting the effect of domestic annoyances, paternal +anxiety, and constantly aroused irritation. Of all the evils in life, +domestic discord is one of the greatest, one under which the heart +bleeds the most; want of sympathy always prevents or banishes affection. +Had Grahame been a careless, selfish man, he might possibly have been +happier; his very sensitiveness was his bane. The silly weaknesses of +his wife might partially have lessened his love for her, but his +children, with all their faults, were dear to their father; they knew +not, guessed not, how much his happiness was centred in theirs; how his +heart was rent with anguish every time that duty, as he imagined, called +on him to be severe. Had he followed the dictates of his nature, he +would rather have ruined his children by over-indulgence than severity; +but the hope of counteracting the effect of their mother's weakness had +guided his mistaken treatment. Could his inmost soul have been read by +those who condemned his harshness, they would have sincerely pitied the +keen and agonized sensitiveness with which he felt the alienation of +their affections. Much as he saw to blame in Annie, had she ever given +him one proof of filial love, all would have been forgiven, and the +blessing of a parent been her own in all she did or wished. Had Cecil +confessed those errors of which he was conscious that he was guilty to +his father, he would have found a true and tender friend, who would have +led his naturally good, though too yielding, character aright, and +misery to both might have been spared, but such was not to be; and in +the fates of Alfred Greville and Cecil Grahame we may chance to perceive +that, whatever may be the difficulties surrounding her, however blighted +may appear the produce of her anxious labours, yet reward will attend +the firm, religious mother, however difficult may be the actual +fulfilment of her duties; while that mother who, surrounded by luxury +and prosperity, believes, by unqualified indulgence, she is firmly +binding her offspring in the observance of love and duty, will reap but +too bitter fruit. + +It was when in the presence of the Duchess of Rothbury Caroline felt +most uncomfortable. The family were as cordial as ever, but there was +somewhat in the cold, penetrating eye of her Grace, that bade her almost +unconsciously shrink from meeting its glance. In the previous season the +Duchess had ever singled Caroline out as an object of her especial +regard, a circumstance so unusual in one of her character, that it +rendered her present haughty coldness more difficult to bear. Caroline +would have borne it in silence had it only extended towards herself, but +it appeared as if both Emmeline and Ellen shared the contempt she +perhaps had justly called forth on herself, as the Duchess, tenacious of +her penetrative powers, feared to honour either of them with her favour, +lest she should be again deceived. Caroline longed to undeceive her on +this point, to give her a just estimate of both her sister and cousin's +character, acknowledge how far superior in filial respect and affection, +as well as in innate integrity and uprightness, they were to herself; +but her mother entreated her to let time do its work, and wait till the +Duchess herself discovered they were not what she either believed they +were or might be, and she checked her wish. + +We will here mention a circumstance which occurred in Mr. Hamilton's +family soon after their arrival in town, which occasioned Mrs. Hamilton +some uneasiness. Ellen's health was now perfectly re-established, and on +Miss Harcourt's unexpected departure, Mrs. Hamilton had determined on +introducing her niece with Emmeline in the present season. If Lucy had +remained in her family, Ellen would not have made her _dĂ©but_ till the +following year, not that her age was any obstacle, for there were only +eight months difference between her and Emmeline, but her retiring +disposition and delicacy of constitution caused Mrs. Hamilton to think +this plan the most advisable. When, however, there was no longer any +excuse with regard to failing health, and no Miss Harcourt with whom her +evenings at home might be more agreeably spent, Mrs. Hamilton, by the +advice of her husband, changed her intention; and Emmeline even made a +joke with Ellen on the admirable fun they should have together, +rejoicing that such an important event in the lives of each should take +place on the same day. It so happened that Ellen never appeared to enter +into her cousin's everlasting merriment on this subject; still she said +nothing for or against till the day all-important with the ordering +their elegant dresses for the occasion. Timidly and hesitatingly she +then ventured to entreat her aunt still to adhere to her first plan, and +allow her to remain quietly at home, under the care of Ellis, till the +following year. Mrs. Hamilton and her cousins looked at her with +astonishment; but the former smilingly replied she could not indulge her +niece in what appeared an unfounded fancy. The dress she should order, +for she hoped Ellen would change her mind before the day arrived, as, +unless a very good reason were given, she could not grant her request. +Ellen appeared distressed; but the conversation changed, and the subject +was not resumed till the day actually arrived, in the evening of which +she was to accompany her aunt to a ball at the Marchioness of Malvern's, +and two days after they were all engaged at a dinner-party at the Earl +of Elmore's. + +Summoning all her courage, Ellen entered her aunt's boudoir in the +morning, and again made her request with an earnestness that almost +startled Mrs. Hamilton, particularly as it was accompanied by a +depression of manner, which she now did not very often permit to obtain +ascendency. With affectionate persuasiveness she demanded the reason of +this extraordinary resolution, and surprise gave way to some +displeasure, when she found Ellen had really none to give. Her only +entreaty was that she might not be desired to go out till the next year. + +"But why, my dear Ellen? You must have some reason for this intended +seclusion. Last year I fancied you wished much to accompany us, and I +ever regretted your delicate health prevented it. What has made you +change your mind so completely? Have you any distaste for the society in +which I mingle?" + +Falteringly, and almost inaudibly, Ellen answered, "None." + +"Is it a religious motive? Do your principles revolt from the amusements +which are now before you? Tell me candidly, Ellen. You know nothing +displeases me so much as mystery? I can forgive everything else, for +then I know our relative positions, and am satisfied you are not going +far wrong; but when every reason is studiously concealed, I cannot guess +the truth, and I must fancy it is, at least, a mistaken notion blinding +your better judgment. I did not expect a second mystery from you, +Ellen." + +Mrs. Hamilton's expressive voice clearly denoted she was displeased, and +her niece, after two or three ineffectual efforts to prevent it, finally +burst into tears. + +"I do not wish to be harsh with you, or accuse you unjustly," continued +her aunt, softened at the unaffected grief she beheld, "but if your +reason be a good one, why do you so carefully conceal it? You have been +lately so very open with me, and appeared to regard me so truly as your +friend, that your present conduct is to me not only a riddle, but a +painful reflection. Is it because your conscience forbids? Perhaps in +your solitary moments you have fancied that worldly amusements, even in +the moderate way in which we regard them, unfits us for more serious +considerations, and you fear perhaps to confess that such is your +reason, because it will seem a reproach to me. If such really be your +motive, do not fear to confess it, my dear girl; I should be the very +last to urge you to do anything that is against your idea of what is +right. To prove the fallacy of such reasoning, to show you that you may +be truly religions without eccentricity, I certainly should endeavour to +do, but I would not force you to go out with me till my arguments had +convinced you. I fancy, by your blushing cheek, that I have really +guessed the cause of your extraordinary resolution, and sorry as I shall +be if I have, yet any reason, however mistaken, is better than a +continued mystery." + +"Indeed, indeed, I am not so good as you believe me," replied Ellen, +with much emotion. "It is not the religious motive you imagine that +urges me to act contrary to your wishes. Did you know my reason, I am +sure you would not blame me; but do not, pray do not command me to tell +you. I must obey, if you do, and then"-- + +"And then, if I approve of your reason, as you say I shall, what is it +that you fear? Why, if your conscience does not reproach you, do you +still hide it from me?" + +Ellen was painfully silent. Mrs. Hamilton continued, in a tone of marked +displeasure, "I fear I am to find myself again deceived in you, Ellen, +though in what manner as yet I know not. I will not do such extreme +violence to your inclinations as to command you to yield to my wishes. +If you desire so much to remain at home, do so; but I cannot engage to +make any excuse for you. Neither failing health nor being too young, can +I now bring forward; I must answer all inquiries for you with the truth, +that your own wishes, which I could not by persuasion overcome, alone +keep you at, home. My conscience will still be clear from the +reproaches so plentifully showered on me by the world last season, that +I feared to bring forward my orphan niece with my daughters, lest her +charms should rival theirs." + +"Did the ill-natured and ignorant dare to say such a thing of you?" +demanded Ellen, startled at this remark. + +"They knew not the cause of your never appearing in public, and +therefore, as appearances were against me, scrupled not to condemn." + +"And do you heed them? Do these remarks affect you?" exclaimed Ellen, +earnestly. + +"No, Ellen. I have done my duty; I will still do it, undisturbed by such +idle calumnies, even should they now be believed by those whose opinions +I value, who, from your seclusion, may imagine they have good reason. In +my conduct towards you the last two years I have nothing to reproach +myself." + +"The last two years. Oh, never, never, from the first moment I was under +your care, never can your conduct to me have given you cause for +self-reproach, dearest aunt. Oh, do not say that the gratification of my +wishes will give rise to a suspicion so unjust, so unfounded," entreated +Ellen, seizing with impetuosity the hand of her aunt. + +"In all probability it will; but do not speak in this strain now, Ellen, +it accords not well with the mystery of your words," and Mrs. Hamilton +coldly withdrew her hand. There was a moment's silence, for Ellen had +turned away, pained to her heart's core, and soon after she quitted the +room to seek her own, where, throwing herself on a low seat by the side +of her couch, she gave way to an unrestrained and violent flow of tears. +Mrs. Hamilton little knew the internal struggle her niece was enduring, +the cause of her seclusion; that the term of her self-condemned +probation was not fulfilled, that the long, tedious task was not +accomplished; that it was for this purpose she so earnestly desired that +her time might not be occupied by amusement, till her task was done, the +errors of her earlier years atoned. Mrs. Hamilton had seldom felt more +thoroughly displeased and hurt with her niece than at the present +moment. Gentle, and invulnerable as she ever seemed to irritation, open +as the day herself, she had ever endeavoured to frame her children's +characters in the like manner; ingenuousness always obtained +forgiveness, whatever might have been the mistake or fault. Ellen had +always been a subject of anxiety and watchfulness; but the last two +years her reserve had so entirely given place to candour, that +solicitude had much decreased, till recalled by the resolution we have +recorded. Had Ellen alleged any reason whatever, all would have been +well; Mrs. Hamilton would not have thought on the subject so seriously. +A mystery in her conduct had once before been so productive of anguish, +that Mrs. Hamilton could not think with her usual calmness and temper on +the circumstance. + +It was so long before Ellen regained her composure that traces of tears +were visible even when she joined the family at dinner, and were +remarked by her uncle, who jestingly demanded what could occasion signs +of grief at such an important era in her life. Vainly Ellen hoped her +aunt would spare her the pain of answering by even expressing her +displeasure at her resolution, but she waited in vain, and she was +compelled to own that the era of her life, to which her uncle so +playfully referred, was postponed by her own earnest desire till the +next season. + +Mr. Hamilton put down his knife and fork in unfeigned astonishment. +"Why, what is the meaning of this sudden change?" he exclaimed. "You +were not wont to be capricious, Ellen. Will your aunt explain this +marvellous mystery?" + +"I am sorry I cannot," Mrs. Hamilton replied, in a tone that plainly +betrayed to the quick ears of her husband that she was more than usually +disturbed. "I am not in Ellen's confidence; her resolution is as +extraordinary to me as to you, for she has given me no reason." Mr. +Hamilton said no more, but he looked vexed, and Ellen did not feel more +comfortable. He detained her as she was about to leave the room, and +briefly demanded in what manner she intended to employ the many hours, +which now that Miss Harcourt was away she would have to herself. A +crimson flush mounted to Ellen's temples as she spoke, a flush that, +combined with the hesitating tone in which she answered, "to read and +work," might well justify the sternness of tone and manner with which +her uncle replied. + +"Ellen, had you never deceived us, I might trust you, spite of that +flushed cheek and hesitating tone; as it is, your conduct the last two +years urges me to do so, notwithstanding appearances, and all I say is, +beware how you deceive me a second time." + +Ellen's cheek lost its colour, and became for the space of a minute pale +as death, so much so, that Mrs. Hamilton regretted her husband should +have spoken so severely. Rallying her energies, Ellen replied, in a +steady but very low voice-- + +"My conduct, uncle, during my aunt's and your absence from home, has +been and shall ever be open to the inspection of all your household. I +am too well aware that I am undeserving of your confidence, but I appeal +to Ellis, on whose fidelity I know you rely, to prove to you in this +case you suspect me unjustly." The last word was audible, but that was +all, and, deeply pained, Ellen retired to her own room, which she did +not quit, even to see her favourite cousin decked for the ball. Emmeline +sought her, however, and tried by kisses to recall the truant rose, the +banished smile, but Mrs. Hamilton did not come to wish her good night, +and Ellen's heart was heavy. + +Some few days passed, and Mrs. Hamilton accepted three several +invitations without again expressing her wishes, but though the subject +was not resumed, equal perplexity existed in the minds of both aunt and +niece. Ellen did not accuse Mrs. Hamilton of unkindness, but she could +not fail to perceive that she no longer retained her confidence, and +that knowledge painfully distressed the orphan's easily excited +feelings. Another circumstance gave additional pain; her strange and +apparently capricious behaviour had been casually mentioned to Herbert, +and he, aware that his advice was always acceptable to Ellen, ventured +to remonstrate with her, and playfully to reason her out of what he +termed her extraordinary fancy for seclusion. Some indefinable sensation +ever prevented Ellen from speaking or writing to Herbert as she would +have done to any other member of the family, but she answered him, +acknowledging she deserved his hinted reproach, but owning that she +could not change her conduct, even in compliance with his request; +nevertheless, it grieved her much to know that he, whose approbation +she unconsciously but ardently wished to gain, should believe her the +capricious, unaccountable being it was evident he did: still she +persevered. These, and whatever more she might have to endure, were but +petty trials, to which her secretly chastened mind might bend but should +not weakly bow. She knew, if her aunt were conscious of her attention, +much as perhaps she might approve of the motive, she would deem it a +needless sacrifice, and probably prohibit its continuance; or, if she +permitted and encouraged it, the merit of her action would no longer +exist, nor could she indeed, while in the enjoyment of praise, have +finished a task, commenced and carried on purely for the sake of duty, +and as an atonement for the past, by the sacrifice of inclination, make +peace with the gracious God she had offended. Petty trials were welcome +then, for if she met them with a Christian temper, a Christian spirit, +she might hope that, whatever she might endure, she was progressing in +His paths, "whose ways are pleasantness, and whose paths are peace;" +could she but remove the lingering displeasure and distrust of her aunt +and uncle, she would be quite happy. + +It so happened that Emmeline's next engagement was to the Opera, which +was always Ellen's greatest conquest of inclination. She had amused +herself by superintending her cousin's dressing, and a sigh so audibly +escaped, that Emmeline instantly exclaimed-- + +"Ellen, you know you would like to go with us. In the name of all that +is incomprehensible, why do you stay at home?" + +"Because, much as I own I should like to go with you, I like better to +stay at home." + +"You really are the spirit of contradiction, Ellen. What did you sigh +for?" + +"Not for the Opera, Emmeline." + +"Then why?" + +"Because I cannot bear to feel my aunt has lost all her confidence in +me." + +"You are marvellously silly, Ellen; mamma is just the same to you as +usual, I have observed no difference." + +"Dear Emmeline, coldness is not _seen_, it is _felt_, and as you have +been so happy as never to have felt it, you cannot understand what I +mean." + +"Nor do I ever wish to feel it. But do not look so sorrowful, dear +Ellen; mamma's coldness is an awful thing to encounter, I own." + +"If you have never felt it, how can you judge?" said a playful voice +beside them, for Emmeline had been too deeply engrossed in arranging and +disarranging a wreath of roses in her hair, and Ellen too much engaged +in her own thoughts, to notice the entrance of Mrs. Hamilton. + +"Is it possible you are not yet ready, Emmeline? what have you been +about?" + +"Teasing Ellen, mamma; besides Fanny was engaged, and I could not please +myself." + +"Or rather you were disinclined for exertion. I have been watching you +the last few moments, and you have played with that pretty wreath till +it is nearly spoiled." + +"I plead guilty, dear mamma, but let Fanny come, and I will be ready in +a second," answered Emmeline, looking archly and caressingly in her +mother's face. Mrs. Hamilton smiled, and turned as if to speak to her +niece, but Ellen was gone. She was sitting in her own room a few minutes +afterwards, endeavouring to collect her thoughts sufficiently to +understand the book of the new opera which her cousin had lent her, when +she was interrupted by a hand gently placed upon the leaves. + +"So coldness is felt, not seen, is it, my dear Ellen? well, then, let +that kiss banish it for ever," exclaimed Mrs. Hamilton, encircling the +delicate form of her niece with her arm. "I have been more distant and +unkind perhaps than was necessary, but your mysterious resolution +irritated me beyond forbearance, and I have been very unjust and very +cruel, have I not? will you forgive me?" + +Ellen looked up in her face, and, unable to control her feelings, threw +her arms around her and burst into tears. + +"Nay, dearest, do not let me leave you in tears. I am satisfied you have +some good reason for your conduct, though my usual penetration is +entirely at fault. Will you quite content me by looking steadily in my +face, and assuring me that your conscience never reproaches your +conduct. I shall not have one lingering doubt then." + +Ellen smiled through her tears, as she tried to obey, but her lip so +quivered as she answered, that Mrs. Hamilton laughingly added, "That +would never do in a court of justice, my silly little girl, no one would +pronounce you innocent if thus tearfully affirmed; but as you generally +compel me to regret severity, when I do venture to use it, I must be +content to let you follow your own inclinations this year at least. Next +season, I give you no such licences, _nolens volens_, as Percy would +say, I must take you out with me, you shall not hide yourself in +solitude; but I do not fancy your resolution will hold good, even the +remainder of this season," she added, smilingly. + +"Do not, pray do not try to turn me from it, my dear, kind aunt," said +Ellen, earnestly; "I do not deserve this indulgence from you, for I know +how much you dislike concealment, but indeed, indeed, you shall never +regret your kindness. I do not, I will not abuse it, it is only because, +because--" She hesitated. + +"Do not excite my curiosity too painfully, Ellen, in return for my +indulgence," said Mrs. Hamilton, sportively. + +"No, dear aunt, I only wish to finish a task I have set myself, and my +various avocations during the day prevent my having any time, unless I +take it from such amusements," said Ellen, blushing as she spoke; +"indeed, that is my real and only reason." + +Mrs. Hamilton fixed an anxious glance upon her, but though she really +felt satisfied at this avowal, the actual truth never entered her mind. + +"You have quite satisfied me, my dear girl! I will not ask more, and you +may stay at home as often as you please. Your uncle and I have both been +very unjust and very severe upon our little Ellen, but you have quite +disarmed us; so you shall neither feel nor fancy my coldness any more. +There is Emmeline calling as loudly for me as if I were after my time. +Good night, love. God bless you! do not sit up too late, and be as happy +as you can." + +"I am quite happy now," exclaimed Ellen, returning, with delighted +eagerness, Mrs. Hamilton's fond embrace, and she was happy. For a moment +she felt lonely, as the door closed on her aunt's retreating form, but +as she roused herself to seek her work, that feeling fled. When the +nature of her work was sufficiently simple to require but little +thought, Ellen was accustomed to improve herself by committing to memory +many parts of the Bible suited for prayer, confession, or praise, so +that her thoughts might riot wander during those solitary hours in the +paths of folly or of sin, but once centred on serious things, her mind +might thence become strengthened and her judgment ripened. + +These lonely hours did much towards the formation of the orphan's +character. Accustomed thus to commune with her Creator, to gather +strength in the solitude of her chamber, she was enabled, when her trial +came, to meet it with a spirit most acceptable to Him who had ordained +it. + + + + +CHAPTER XI. + + +Lord Malvern's family and Mr. Hamilton's were still in town, though the +younger members of each were longing for the fresh air of the country. + +One afternoon, hot and dusty from rapid riding, the young Earl St. Eval +hastily, and somewhat discomposedly, entered his sister Lady Gertrude's +private room. + +"Thank heaven, you are alone!" was his exclamation, as he entered; but +throwing himself moodily on a couch, he did not seem inclined to say +more. + +"What is the matter, dear Eugene? Something has disturbed you," said +Lady Gertrude, soothingly, and in a tone tending rather to allay his +irritation than express her own desire to know what had happened. + +"Something--yes, Gertrude, enough to bid me forswear England again, and +bury myself in a desert, where a sigh from your sex could never reach me +more." + +"Not even mine, Eugene?" exclaimed his sister, laying down her work, and +seating herself on a stool at his feet, while she looked up in his +excited features with an expression of fondness on her placid +countenance. "Would you indeed forbid my company, if I implored to share +your solitude?" + +"My sister, my own kind sister, would I, could I deprive myself of the +blessing, the comfort your presence ever brings?" replied St. Eval, +earnestly. "No, dearest Gertrude, I could not refuse you, whatever you +might ask." + +"Then tell me now what it is that has disturbed you thus. With what new +fancy are you tormenting yourself?" + +"Nay, this is no fancy, Gertrude. You are, you have been wrong from the +first, and I am too painfully right Caroline does not and never will +love me." + +Lady Gertrude started. + +"Have you been again rejected?" she demanded, a dark flush of indignant +pride suffusing her cheek. + +Lord St. Eval mournfully smiled. + +"You are as summary in your conclusions as you say I am sometimes. No, +Gertrude, I have not; I feel as if I could not undergo the torture I +once experienced in saying those words which I hoped would seal my +happiness." + +"Nay, then, I must say them for you," said Lady Gertrude, smiling. "I +have watched Caroline narrowly, and I feel so confident she loves you, +that I would, without the slightest doubt or fear, consign your +happiness, precious as it is to me, to her disposal." + +"Forbear, Gertrude, for pity!" exclaimed Lord St. Eval, starting up and +pacing the room. "You saw not what I saw last night, nor heard the cold, +malicious words warning me against her; that even when she had accepted, +she was false; or, if she were not false, that she still loved another. +I saw it in her varying cheek, her confused manner; I heard it in her +hurried accents, and this morning has confirmed all--all. Gertrude, I +ever told you, my lot was not happiness; that as the fate of some men is +all bright, so that of others is all gloom, and such is mine." + +"Eugene, how often must I entreat you not to speak thus. Man's happiness +or misery, in a great measure, depends upon himself. You have often said +that when with me, you reason more calmly than when you think alone; +only tell me coherently what has chanced, and all may not be so gloomy +as you believe." + +St. Eval suffered himself to be persuaded, and seating himself beside +his sister, he complied with her request. + +The fact was simply this. He had returned to England, at the entreaty of +his sister, determined to discover if indeed there existed any hope of +his at length obtaining Caroline's affections. Lady Gertrude's letter to +him purposely portrayed the many amiable qualities existing in +Caroline's character, and the general tenour of her words had led him to +resolve that if he could indeed make so favourable an impression on her +heart as to teach her to forget the past, he too would banish pride, and +secure his happiness, and he hoped hers, by a second offer of his hand. +Her conduct, guarded as it was, had unconsciously strengthened his +hopes, and the last few weeks he had relaxed so much in his reserve, as +to excite in the mind of Caroline the hope, almost the certainty, that +he no longer despised her, and created for himself many truly delightful +hours. It so happened that, on the evening to which he referred, +Caroline had gone to a large party, under the protection of the Countess +of Elmore, who at the entreaty of the lady of the house, had obtained +the permission of Mrs. Hamilton to introduce her. The young Earl had +devoted himself to her the greater part of the evening, to the +satisfaction of both, when his pleasure was suddenly and painfully +alloyed by her visible confusion at the unexpected entrance, and still +more unexpected salutation, of Lord Alphingham. Caroline had so seldom +met the Viscount during the season, that she was not yet enabled to +conquer her agitation whenever she beheld him. She ever dreaded his +addressing her; ever felt that somewhat lurked in his insinuating voice, +that would in the end lead to evil; besides which, her abhorrence +towards him whenever Percy's tale flashed across her mind, which it +never failed to do when he appeared, always prevented her retaining her +calmness undisturbed. Lord St. Eval had left England with the impression +that Alphingham was his favoured rival, and his imagination instantly +attributed Caroline's emotion at his entrance into a preference for the +Viscount. His earnest manner suddenly became chilled, his eloquence +checked. Intuitively Caroline penetrated his suspicions; the wish to +prove they were mistaken and unjust increased her confusion, and instead +of lessening, confirmed them. St. Eval said little more to her during +the evening; but he watched her. He saw Lord Alphingham whisperingly +address her. She appeared to become more painfully confused, and St. +Eval could scarcely restrain himself from hurrying from her sight for +ever; but he did restrain himself, only to be more tortured. + +The Viscount now believed the hour of his vengeance was at hand, when, +without the slightest exertion, he might disturb not only St. Eval's +peace, but that of Caroline. + +If St. Eval had but heard the few words he said to her, jealousy would +have been instantly banished, but for that he was not sufficiently near; +he could only mark the earnest and insinuating manner which the Viscount +knew so well how to assume, and notice her confusion, and the shade of +melancholy expressed on her features, which was in fact occasioned by +Lord St. Eval's sudden desertion, and her annoyance at the cause. His +quick imagination attributed all to the effect of Lord Alphingham's +tender words. The Viscount was well known, to him, and near the end of +the evening approached and remained in conversation by his side, spite +of the haughty reserve maintained by the young Earl, which said so +plainly, "your presence is unwelcome," that it would speedily have +dismissed any one less determined; but Lord Alphingham spoke admiringly +and enthusiastically of Caroline. Lord St. Eval listened, as if +fascinated by the very torture he endured. They were quite alone, and +after a few such observations, the Viscount lowered his voice to a +confidential tone, and said, triumphantly-- + +"Will you envy me, St. Eval, if I confess that I, more than any other +man, am privileged to speak in Miss Hamilton's praise, having once had +the honour of being her accepted lover, and had not cruel parents +interfered, might now have claimed that lovely creature as my own? but +still I do not despair, for the affections of a being so superior once +given to me, as they have been, I am convinced they will never be +another's. I am treating you as a friend, St. Eval, you will not betray +me?" + +"You may trust me, sir," replied the young Earl, coldly. "Your +confidence has been given unasked, but you need not fear its betrayal." + +"Thank you, my kind friend;" and the wily villain continued his +deceiving tale, with an eloquence we will not trouble ourselves to +repeat. It is enough to know its effect on St. Eval was to turn him from +the room, his sensitive feelings wrought almost to madness by malignant +bitterness. Lord Alphingham looked after him, and then turned his glance +on Caroline, and an acute physiognomist might easily have read his +inward thoughts--"My vengeance is complete." + +Alphingham had more than once mentioned the name of the Duchess of +Rothbury; but in such a manner, that though it sounded well enough in +his tale, yet when afterwards recalled by the young Earl, he could not +understand in what position she stood towards them. Lord Alphingham knew +well her Grace's character; he wished St. Eval to seek her, for he felt +assured what she would say would confirm his tale, and render the +barrier between him and Caroline more impassable. His plan succeeded +admirably: St. Eval gallopped off to Airslie early the next morning. The +Duchess welcomed him with the greatest cordiality, for he was a +favourite; but the moment he spoke of Caroline her manner changed. She +became as reserved as she had previously been warm; and when the young +Earl frankly asked her if the refusal of her parents had been the only +bar to her union with the Viscount, she referred him to Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton. That she was aware of something to Caroline's disadvantage +appeared very evident, and that she was not the favourite she had been +last year equally so. St. Eval left her more disturbed than ever, and it +was on returning from his long yet hurried ride he had sought his sister +in the mood we have described. + +Lady Gertrude listened with earnest attention. The tale startled her, +but she disliked the very sight of Lord Alphingham; she believed him to +be a bad, designing man. She felt convinced Caroline did love her +brother, much as appearances were against her; and both these feelings +urged her to sift the whole matter carefully, and not permit the +happiness of two individuals to be sacrificed to what might be but the +idle invention or exaggerations of a bad man. Her ready mind instantly +formed its plan, which calmly but earnestly she imparted to her brother, +and implored his consent to act upon it. Startled and disturbed, St. +Eval at first peremptorily refused; but his sisters's eloquence at +length succeeded. + +Early in the morning of the succeeding day Caroline Hamilton received +the following brief note: + +"Will you, my dear Caroline, receive me half an hour this afternoon? I +have something important to say; I have vanity enough to believe as it +concerns me it will interest you. We shall be more alone at your house +than mine, or I might ask you to come to me. + +"Yours affectionately, + +"GERTRUDE LYLE." + +Completely at a loss to understand the meaning of this little note, +Caroline merely wrote a line to say she should be quite at Lady +Gertrude's service at the appointed time; and so deeply was she +engrossed in the sad tenour of her own thoughts, that all curiosity as +to this important communication was dismissed. + +Three o'clock came and so did Lady Gertrude, whose first exclamation was +to notice Caroline's unusual paleness. + +"Do not heed my looks, dear Gertrude, I am perfectly well; and now that +you are before me, overwhelmed with curiosity as to your intelligence," +said Caroline, whose heavy eyes belied her assurance that she was quite +well. + +"Dearest Caroline," said Lady Gertrude, in a tone of feeling, "I am so +interested in your welfare, that I cannot bear to see the change so +evident in you; something has disturbed you. Show me you consider me +your friend, and tell me what it is." + +"Not to you, oh, not to you; I cannot, I dare not!" burst involuntarily +from the lips of the poor girl, in a tone of such deep distress, that +Lady Gertrude felt pained. "Gertrude, do not ask me; I own I am unhappy, +very, very unhappy, but I deserve to be so. Oh, I would give worlds that +I might speak it, and to you; but I cannot--will not! But do not refuse +me the confidence you offered," she added, again endeavouring to smile, +"I can sympathise in your happiness, though I refuse yours in my +sadness." + +"I am not quite sure whether I have sorrow or joy to impart," said Lady +Gertrude, still feelingly; for she guessed why Caroline believed she +dare not confide in her, and she hailed it as proof that she was right +in her surmise, that her brother's honourable love would not be again +rejected. + +"Eugene seems bent on again quitting England, and I fear if he do, he +will not return home again. On one little circumstance depends his final +determination; my persuasions to the contrary have entirely failed." + +The cheek of her companion blanched even paler than before, two or three +large tears gathered in her eyes, then slowly fell, one by one, upon her +tightly-clasped hands. + +"And if you have failed, who will succeed?" she asked, with a strong +effort. + +"The chosen one, whose power over the heart of St. Eval is even greater +than mine," said Lady Gertrude, steadily. "Ah, Caroline, when a man has +learned to love, the affection of a sister is of little weight." + +"He does love, then," thought Caroline, and her heart swelled even to +bursting, and he goes to seek her. "And will not the being Lord St. Eval +has honoured with his love second your efforts? if she be in England, +can she wish him to quit it?" she said aloud, in answer to her friend. + +"If she love him, she will not," said Lady Gertrude; "but St. Eval fears +to ask the question that decides his fate. Strange and wayward as he is, +he would rather create certain misery for himself, than undergo the +torture of being _again refused_." + +For a few minutes Caroline answered not; then, with a sudden effort, +rallying her energies, she exclaimed, as if in jest-- + +"Why, then, does he not make you his messenger; the affection you bear +for him would endow you with an eloquence, I doubt much whether his own +would surpass." + +She would have spoken more in the same strain, but the effort failed; +and turning away from Lady Gertrude's penetrating glance, which she felt +was fixed upon her, though she could not meet it, she burst into tears. + +More than ever convinced of the truth of her suspicions, Lady Gertrude's +noble mind found it impossible to continue this mode of discovery any +longer. She saw that Caroline imagined not she was the being alluded to; +that not even the phrase "again refused" had startled her into +consciousness, and she felt it was unkind to distress her more. + +"I knew it was false," she exclaimed, as the Viscount's tale flashed +across her mind; then, checking herself, she took Caroline's cold and +half-reluctant hand, and added, in a voice of extreme feeling, +"Caroline, dearest Caroline, forgive my having penetrated your secret; +fear me not, dear girl, I honour too much the feeling which dictates +your conduct. You have learned to love St. Eval; you have repented the +wilful and capricious treatment he once received from you. Deny it not, +nay, do not shrink from me, and think, because I appear so calm, I +cannot feel for those who are dear to me, and even sympathise in their +love. I do not, I will not condemn the past; I did once, I own, but +since I have known you, I have forgiven the mistaken wilfulness of a +misguided girl. You love him--confess that I am right, dearest." + +Caroline's face was concealed within her hand, and almost agonized was +its expression as she looked up. + +"Gertrude," she said, in a low, suffocated voice, "is it well, is it +kind in you thus to speak, to lead me to avow a love for one who, your +own words inform me, will soon be the husband of another?" + +"I said not of another, my dear girl; forgive me this stratagem to +penetrate your well-preserved secret. My brother's happiness is so dear +to me, I could not trust it to one of whose affection I was not certain. +I am not aware I said he would soon be the husband of another; since, if +he be again refused, that he never will be. Simply, then, for I have +been quite tormenting enough, Eugene has striven long with himself to +conquer his love, to be happy as your friend; associating with you as he +does with Emmeline, but he cannot. He still loves you, Caroline, as +devotedly, as faithfully--perhaps more so than when he first offered you +his hand; he dares not renew that offer himself, for he feels a second +refusal from your lips would wound him too deeply. Your voice may chain +him to England, an altered and a happier man, or send him from its +shores a misanthrope and wretched: it is for you to decide, Caroline, +dearest. Must I plead with that eloquence, which you said would surpass +even his own, or will the pleadings of your own kind heart suffice?" + +She paused, in evident emotion, for with a faint cry Caroline had thrown +herself on her neck, and buried her cheek upon her shoulder. Every limb +trembled with agitation; the ecstatic delight of that one moment--doubt +was, indeed, at an end. He loved her, and in spite of her faults he +would cherish her with tenderness; he had chosen her as his wife--chosen +her, though she had rejected, injured him, in preference to the very +many she felt so much more worthy than herself; but unalloyed happiness +was hers only for a few fleeting minutes, he knew not the extent of her +imprudence--how strangely and deeply she had been fascinated by the arts +of Lord Alphingham. Could he love, respect her as the partner of his +life, did he know that? and for a moment painfully did she long to +conceal it from him, to prevent his ever knowing it; but no, her innate +nobility and ingenuousness of character would not be thus trampled on. +She wept, and Lady Gertrude was startled, for those bitter tears were +not the signs of joy. + +"Do not condemn my weakness, dearest Gertrude," she said at length, +struggling for composure. "You do not know why I weep; you cannot guess +the cause of tears at such a moment. Yes, you are right; I do love your +brother with an affection equal to his own, but I thought it would never +pass my lips; for wilfully, blindly I had rejected the affection of his +good and noble heart; I had intentionally caused him pain, banished him +from his country and his friends, and my punishment was just. I thought +he would forget one so utterly unworthy, and the thought was agony. But, +oh, Gertrude, I shall never regain his love: when he knows all, he will +cease to trust me; his esteem I have lost for ever! Gertrude, bear with +me; you cannot know the wretchedness it is to feel he knows not all my +folly. The girl who could wilfully cast aside duty and obedience to a +parent, listen to forbidden vows, weakly place her honour in the power +of one against whom she had been warned--oh, Gertrude, Gertrude, when +St. Eval learns this tale, he will spurn me from his heart! and yet I +will not deceive him, he shall know all, and be free to act as he +will--his proposals shall be no tie." + +The flush of firm yet painful resolution dyed her cheek as she spoke, +and checked her tears. Alarmed as she was by the incoherence yet +connection of her words when attached to Lord Alphingham's hints, which +still lingered on her mind, yet the high-minded Lady Gertrude felt as if +Caroline's honourable determination had struck a new chord of sympathy +within her heart. Integrity itself was hers, and truth in others was +ever to her their most attractive quality. + +"St. Eval's doubts and fears have been already painfully aroused," she +said, gently; "an open explanation from you is more likely to make him +happy than produce the effect you so much, though so naturally, dread: +fear not to impart it. In the relation you now stand to each other, the +avowal of past errors will increase rather than lessen affection, by the +integrity it will display; but leave it till years have passed, and if, +instead of being known now, it is then discovered, then, indeed, might +you fear, with some show of justice, the loss of his esteem. Such will +not be now; but tell him yourself, dear Caroline, the truth or falsehood +of the scandalous tale he heard a night or two ago." + +"What did he hear? if you know, for pity's sake, do not conceal it from +me, dearest Gertrude!" entreated Caroline, almost gasping for breath; +and Lady Gertrude, without hesitation or abbreviation, related the whole +tale her brother had imparted to her, dwelling on the suffering he +endured, as he fancied Caroline's conduct confirmed the words he heard. + +"Then is it, indeed, time for me to speak, though my tale be one of +shame," she exclaimed, as Lady Gertrude paused, and indignation restored +her usual energy. "Never were attentions so revolting to me as were +those of Lord Alphingham that night. He knew he had no right to address +me, and therefore did he ever refrain when mamma was present. Gertrude, +solemnly, sacredly, I protest he has no hold on my affections--he dare +not say he has--nor ever again venture to demand my hand; it has been +irrevocably refused. Not only would my own will prevent my ever becoming +his, but I have--" she paused a moment, for Percy's fatal secret was on +the point of escaping from her lips, but checking herself, she added, "I +am not at liberty to say why, but an inseparable barrier is placed +between us. Listen to me, Gertrude, you will condemn me, be it so; but I +implore, I beseech you to believe me true." Then, without further +hesitation, Caroline briefly yet circumstantially related all those +events in her life with which our readers are so well acquainted. She +did not suppress one point, or endeavour in the least to excuse herself, +and Lady Gertrude, as she listened to that unvarnished tale of youthful +error, felt her heart glow more warmly towards her companion, and her +eye glisten in sympathy for the pain she felt Caroline was inflicting on +herself. Lady Gertrude could feel for others; twice had her carriage +been announced, but she heeded not the summons; a third came just as +Caroline had ceased to speak, and silently she rose to depart. She met +the imploring look of her young friend, and folding her to her heart, +she said, in a low and gentle voice-- + +"Ask not me, my dearest girl; St. Eval shall come and speak for +himself." She kissed her affectionately, and was gone. + +Caroline seated herself on a low couch, and closing her eyes on every +outward object, she gave herself up to thought. Might she indeed be +happy--were the errors of her former years so forgiven, that she would +indeed be blessed with the husband of her choice? Had St. Eval so +conquered pride as again to seek her love--would the blessing of her +parents now sanctify her marriage? it could not be, it was too much +bliss--happiness of which she was utterly unworthy. Time rolled by +unheeded in these meditations; she was quite unconscious that nearly +half an hour had elapsed since Lady Gertrude had left her; scarcely did +it appear five minutes, and yet it must have been more, for it was the +voice of St. Eval himself that roused her, that addressed her as his own +bride. St. Eval himself, who clasped her impetuously to his beating +heart, imprinted one long, lingering kiss upon her cheek and murmured +blessings on her head. He had waited for the return of his sister to the +carriage, in a state of impatience little to be envied, flung himself in +after her, and in a very brief space had heard and heard again every +particular of her interview with Caroline. His doubts wore satisfied, +not a lingering fear remained. + +"Gertrude told me, you said not to her the magic word that will seal my +happiness, though she wrung from you that precious secret of your love," +said the young Lord, after many very fond words had been exchanged +between them, and nearly an hour had passed away in that unrestrained +confidence; "nor have I heard it pass your lips. You have told me that +you love me, Caroline; will you not promise that but a very short time +shall pass, ere you will indeed be mine; that you will not sentence me +to a long probation ere that happy day is fixed?" + +"It is not in my power to answer you, St. Eval," and though her tone was +sportive, her words startled him. "I cannot even promise to be yours; my +fate is not in my own hands." + +"Caroline!" exclaimed the alarmed young man, "what can you mean?" + +"Simply, that I have vowed solemnly and sacredly never to many without +the consent and blessing of my parents. I have given you all I can, to +them I refer you for the rest." + +"Then I am satisfied," replied St. Eval, the flush of joyous excitement +staining his cheek, and rendering his expressive countenance more than +usually handsome, by the animation it produced. + +Mrs. Hamilton, with Emmeline and Ellen, had returned from their ride +rather later than usual, for they had gone to see a friend some few +miles out of town, and finding it near the hour of dinner, they had +dispersed to their dressing-rooms instead of entering the drawing-room +as usual. On inquiring for Caroline, if she had been out with Lady +Gertrude, or was still at home, she heard, to her extreme astonishment, +that Miss Hamilton had not gone out, but that Lord St. Eval had been +with her above an hour, nor had she left him to obey the summons of the +dressing-bell, as usual. A throb of pleasure shot through the heart of +Mrs. Hamilton, she scarcely knew wherefore, for it was no uncommon thing +for Lord St. Eval to spend an hour at her house, but it was that he +should thus have sought the society of Caroline alone. + +"Had either of her sons been with him?" she asked, and the answer was in +the negative. + +Martyn silently concluded her task, for she saw deep thought was on her +lady's brow, which she was too respectful to disturb; an earnest thought +it was, it might have been that silent prayer had mingled with it. Still +was that wish uppermost in Mrs. Hamilton's mind, that she might one day +see her Caroline the happy wife of Lord St. Eval; but when she entered +the drawing-room, words were not needed to explain the scene before her. +Mr. Hamilton had drawn his daughter to him, and was pressing the young +Earl's hand in his with a grasp that spoke volumes. + +"St. Eval, you have been too long the son of my affections, for one +instant to doubt my consent," Mrs. Hamilton heard her husband say, as +she entered; "it is yours, freely, gladly. Speak not of fortune, I would +give my child to you, had you but yourself to offer. But I am but a +secondary personage in this business," he added, playfully; "there is +the enchantress who holds the fate of my Caroline more firmly than I do. +Away with you, St. Eval, plead your cause to her." + +"Caroline, my own, does your happiness depend on my consent, or have you +done this merely for my sake?" murmured Mrs. Hamilton, as her child +clung in silence to her neck, and Lord St. Eval seized her hand and +pressed it to his lips, as if eloquent silence should tell his tale, +too, better than words. Mrs. Hamilton spoke in a voice so low, as to be +heard only by Caroline. + +"Speak to me, love; tell me that St. Eval will be the husband of your +free, unbiased choice, and my fondest blessing shall be yours." +Caroline's answer was inaudible to all, save to the ear of maternal +affection, to her mother it was enough. + +"Take her, St. Eval; my consent, my earnest wish to behold you united +has long been yours; may God in heaven bless you, my children, and make +you happy in each other!" + +Solemnly she spoke; her earnestness was affecting, it struck to their +hearts; for a moment there was silence, which Mrs. Hamilton was the +first to break. + +"Does my Caroline intend appearing at dinner in this costume?" she +asked, playfully, alluding to her daughter's morning dress. Startled and +blushing, Caroline, for the first time, perceived her mother was dressed +for dinner, and her father, determining to banish all appearance of +gravity, held up his watch, which pointed to some few minutes after the +usual dinner-hour. Glad to escape for a few minutes to the solitude of +her own room, Caroline hastily withdrew her hand from St. Eval's +detaining grasp, and smiling a brief farewell, brushed by Emmeline and +Ellen, who were that instant entering, without speaking indeed, but with +very evident marks of confusion, which Mr. Hamilton very quickly +explained to the extreme satisfaction of all parties. + +Caroline was not long before she returned. Happiness had caused her eyes +to sparkle with a radiance her parents had not seen for many a long day; +and they felt as they gazed on her, now indeed was she worthy to be the +honoured wife of St. Eval, and their thoughts were raised in silent +unison to heaven for the blessing thus vouchsafed to them. And scarcely +could Mr. Hamilton restrain the emotion which swelled his bosom, as he +thought, had it not been for the untiring care, the bright example of +that mother, his child, instead of being a happy bride, might now have +been--he shuddered as he thought, and the inward words were checked, he +could not give them vent, they were hidden in the silent recesses of his +own breast; and did not that same thought dwell in the mind of his wife, +when she contrasted the present with the past? It did, but she looked +not on herself as the cause of her child's escape from wretchedness and +sin. Her efforts she knew would have been as naught, without the +blessing of Him whose aid she had ever sought; and if indeed the thought +of her had arrested Caroline on the brink of ruin, it was His work, and +Him alone she praised. She looked on the glowing countenance of her +daughter; she marked the modest gentleness of her demeanour, the +retiring dignity with which she checked the effusions of her own fond +affection, and received the attentions of her devoted lover, and she +felt sure those few moments of solitude had been passed in thanksgiving +and prayer to Him who had pardoned the errors of the past, and granted +such unlooked-for joy. And she guessed aright, for the mind of Caroline +had not been entirely engrossed by the bright and glowing visions which +anticipation in such a moment of our lives is apt to place before us. +Her thoughts during the last year had been secretly under the guidance +of the most rigid self-control, and thus permitted her to raise them +from the happiness of earth to blessedness yet more exalted. Oh! who can +say that religion is the heavy chain that fetters us to gloom and +everlasting sadness; that in chastening the pleasures of earth, it +offers no substantial good in return? True piety, open the heart by its +sweet, refreshing influence, causes us to enjoy every earthly blessing +with a zest the heart in which the love of God is not an inmate will +seek in vain to know. It is piety that strengthens, purifies affection. +Piety, that looks on happiness vouch us here, as harbingers of a state +where felicity will be eternal. Piety that, in lifting up the grateful +soul to God, heightens our joys, and renders that pure and lasting +which would otherwise be evanescent and fleeting. Piety, whose soft and +mildly-burning torch continues to enlighten life, long, long after the +lustre of worldly pleasures has passed away. It was this blessed +feeling, kindled in earliest infancy by the fostering hand of parental +love, which now characterised and composed every emotion of Caroline's +swelling bosom, which bade her feel that this indeed was happiness. With +blushing modesty she received the eagerly-offered congratulations of her +affectionate family; the delighted embrace which Percy in the enthusiasm +of his joy found himself compelled to give her. + +"Now, indeed, may I hope the past will never again cross my mind to +torment me," he whispered to his sister, and wrung St. Eval's hand with +a violence that forced that young man laughingly to cry for mercy. There +had been a shade of unusual gloom shrouding the open countenance and +usually frank demeanour of Percy since his return from Oxford, for which +his parents and sisters could not account, but as he seemed to shrink +from all observation on the subject, they did not ask the cause; but +this unexpected happiness seemed to make him for a few following days as +usual the gayest, merriest member of his amiable family. + +Often in these days of happiness did Caroline think on the qualities +which Lady Gertrude had once said should adorn the wife of her brother. +Faults he could pardon, if they were redeemed by affection, and +ingenuousness unsullied by the slightest artifice. Affection she well +knew she possessed; but she also knew that, to be as unreserved as would +form the happiness of her husband, she must effectually banish that +pride, which she knew still lurked within. Often would she converse on +these things when alone with her mother, and implore her advice as to +the best method of securing not only the love but the esteem of St. +Eval. "Gertrude was quite right in the estimate of her brother's +character," Mrs. Hamilton would at such times observe, her fond heart +fully repaid for past anxiety and disappointment by this confidence in +her child; "and so too are you, dearest, in your idea that not the +faintest sign of pride must mark your intercourse with him. Perhaps he +is more reserved than proud; indeed, in his case, I cannot call it +pride, but it is that kind of reserve which would jar most painfully did +it come in contact with anything resembling pride. Had you grown up such +as you were in childhood, your union with St. Eval, much as you might +think you loved each other, would not have been productive of lasting +happiness to either. Let him see dependence is not merely a profession +which your every action would contradict; from independence spring so +many evils, that I feel sure you will avoid it. It is, I regret to say, +a prevailing error in those circles wherein your rank will entitle you +to mingle; an error that must ever endanger conjugal happiness. When a +woman marries, the world, except as the arbiter of propriety, ought to +be forgotten; all her endeavours to please, to soothe, to cheer, must +still be exerted even more than before marriage, but exerted only for +her husband; not one little pleasing art, not one accomplishment should +be given up, but used as affection dictates, to enhance her value in the +eyes of him whose felicity it should be her principal aim to increase. +You will be placed in an exalted station in the opinion of the world, my +beloved child, a station of temptation, flattery, danger, more so than +has over yet been yours; but I do not tremble now as I did, too +forebodingly, when the world was first opened to your view. You have +learned to mistrust your own strength, to seek it where alone it can be +found, to examine your every action by the Word of God, and with these +feelings you are safe. My Caroline will not fail in duty to her husband +or herself." + +"Nor to you, my mother, my devoted mother!" exclaimed Caroline, as she +fondly kissed her. "It is to you, next to my God, I owe this blessing; +and oh, if it be my lot to be a mother, may I be to my children, as far, +at least, as one so much inferior in piety and virtue can be, what you +have been to me. Oh, might I but resemble you, as my full heart has so +lately longed, St. Eval might be happy!" + +At the earnest entreaty of St. Eval and Caroline, both families +consented that the ceremonial of their marriage should take place in the +same venerable church where the first childish prayers of Caroline had +ascended from a house of God, and the service be performed by the +revered and pious rector of Oakwood, the clergyman who, from her +earliest childhood, she had been taught to respect and love, as the +humble representative of Him whose truths he so ably taught. Caroline +had consented to name the second week of September as the period of her +espousals. The few chosen friends of both families who were to be +invited to the ceremony were to assemble in the hospitable halls of +Oakwood, and earnestly did every member of Mr. Hamilton's family hope +that the long-absent sailor, Edward Fortescue, who was soon expected +home, might arrive in time to be present at the marriage of his cousin. +How the young heart of his orphan sister fluttered with delight at the +thought of beholding him again we will not attempt to describe, but it +was shared with almost equal warmth by Mrs. Hamilton, whose desire was +so great that her gallant nephew, the brave preserver of her husband, +might be present at the approaching joyful event, that she laughingly +told Ellen she certainly would postpone the ceremony till Edward +arrived, whatever opposition she might have to encounter. + +The engagement of the Eight Honourable Earl St. Eval, the heir to the +marquisate of Malvern, embracing such rich possessions, with a plain +gentleman's daughter was a matter of mingled wonder, scorn, admiration, +and applause to the fashionable world; but these opinions and emotions +were little regarded, save as a matter of continual jest to Percy, who +amused himself by collecting all the reports he could, and repeating +them at home, warning them against a marriage which caused such an +universal sensation. It might be supposed this sensation would have been +felt in various ways in the family of Montrose Grahame; but it happened +that Annie was so engrossed with her own plans, her mind so occupied by +one interesting subject, that she and Lord Alphingham had but little +time to think of anything but each other. Annoyed they were indeed, for +all their designs were foiled; St. Eval and Caroline were happy, spite +of their efforts to the contrary. Lady Helen was really so delighted at +the prospects of Caroline, who had ever been a favourite with her, that +she actually exerted herself so much as to call in person to offer her +best wishes, and promise that she would spend the whole winter at +Moorlands, to be present at the ceremony. Lilla was overjoyed, for Mrs. +Hamilton promised she should be among the guests at Oakwood. Mr. +Grahame, whose friendship with Mr. Hamilton would have and did render +him most interested in the event, was at Paris when their engagement was +first published, but his warmly-written letters to his friend proclaimed +his intention of very soon returning to England, but till then +entreating the young couple to accept his sincerest prayers and best +wishes for their happiness, and warmly congratulated Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton on the prospects of their child; but there was a sadness +pervading his letters which gave them pain to note, for they knew too +well the cause. + +The letters of Mary Greville, too, added pleasure to the betrothed. +Informed by Herbert of both past and present events, St. Eval's long +affection for Caroline, which he playfully hoped would solve the mystery +of his not gratifying her wishes, and falling in love with Miss Manvers, +Mary wrote with equal sportiveness, that she was quite satisfied with +his choice, and pleased that his residence at Lago Guardia had enabled +her to become so well acquainted with one about to be so nearly +connected with her Herbert. + +About a week or fortnight before Mr. Hamilton's intended return to +Oakwood, Percy one morning received a letter which appeared to produce +excessive agitation. But as he evidently did not wish it remarked, no +notice was taken, except by Herbert, to whom alone he had shown the +letter, and who seemed equally interested, though not so much agitated +by its contents. To the anxious inquiries of his parents, if individual +embarrassment or distress occasioned Percy's uneasiness, Herbert +answered readily in the negative; that the letter informed them of the +death of an unfortunate individual in whose fate both he and Percy had +been most deeply interested. Trusting in the well-known integrity of +their sons, Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton inquired no farther, and dismissed the +subject; but Percy did not rouse himself from his gloomy abstraction +till startled by intelligence, which regard for his father's friend +Grahame could not permit him to hear with calmness. + +Two mornings after the receipt of that letter, as the family, which the +addition of St. Eval, were sitting together after breakfast, ere they +separated to the various avocations of the day, Lord Henry D'Este +bustled in with a countenance expressive of something extraordinary. + +"Have you heard the news?" was his first eager exclamation. + +"If we had, it would be no news," replied Emmeline, archly; "but we have +heard nothing. Papa has something else to do than to seek out news for +me, ditto the Right Honourable Lord St. Eval. Percy has been suddenly +converted into the spirit of gloom, and to Herbert it is in vain to look +for gossip, so, for pity's sake, satisfy my curiosity." + +"Perhaps you will say I have been exciting it unnecessarily," he +answered. "An elopement is too common a thing now to cause much +astonishment." + +"It depends on the parties," observed Mr. Hamilton. "Who are they?" + +"Those, or rather one of them, I fear, for her father's sake, in whom +you will be too deeply interested,--Lord Alphingham and Miss Grahame." + +"Annie!" burst from Caroline's lips, in an accent of distress that +struck all, and fell somewhat, painfully on Lord St. Eval's ear, when +starting from the seat she had occupied near him, she sprung forward, +and wildly continued, "when--when? Lord Henry, for pity's sake, tell me! +is there no time? Can they not be overtaken? When did they go?" + +Bewildered at the wild earnestness of her manner, at the muttered +execration of Percy, Lord Henry was for a moment silent; but, on the +repeated entreaty of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, he said that the particulars +were not yet all known, except that she had been staying with her +friend, that same lady of rank in whose family Miss Malison had been +installed; that from her house the elopement had taken place, when, he +did not exactly know, the report had only that morning gained credit. +Lady Helen was not in the least aware of what had passed, nor would she, +in all probability, till Annie's own letter announced it, as she turned +a careless ear to all that her friends had hinted. He greatly feared, +however, that it was useless to think of overtaking them; they had been +seen and recognised, on the road between York and Berwick, by a friend +of his, three days previous. He had at first regarded his friend's +letter as a mere jest, but finding he had written the same to many +others, and that the report was gaining ground, he felt sufficient +interest in Mr. Grahame to discover the truth, that he might be informed +of it, and take measures accordingly, and as Grahame was from home, he +thought the best thing he could do was to tell the whole story to Mr. +Hamilton. + +"And is there indeed no hope? Can they not be overtaken?" again demanded +Caroline, almost choked with an agitation for which even her parents +could not account. + +Lord Henry did not think there was the slightest possibility, and +unable to control her emotion, for she could not forget the long years +she had regarded Annie as her friend, the favourite companion of her +childhood, Caroline sunk, pale as death, on the nearest seat. Her mother +and St. Eval approached her in some alarm, the former to demand the +cause of this agitation, and implore her to be calm; the latter to +connect, with a swelling heart and trembling frame, this deep emotion +with the words of Lord Alphingham, which he vainly endeavoured to +forget; but Percy alone had power to restore her to any degree of +composure, taking her trembling hand in his, he whispered a few words, +and their effect was instantaneous. + +"Thank God, she will be at least his wife!" escaped Caroline's quivering +lips, and then burst into tears. + +"Mother, do not ask more now. St. Eval, do not doubt my sister, her +agitation arose for Miss Grahame alone, not for the villain, the +cold-hearted villain, Alphingham!" exclaimed Percy, in a low but +impressive voice, as he alternately addressed his mother and the Earl, +and then, as if fearing their further questions, he hastily turned away +to join his father in demanding every possible information from Lord +Henry; and perceiving that Caroline was becoming calm, and also that St. +Eval looked somewhat disturbed, Mrs. Hamilton followed her son to the +other end of the room. Still St. Eval spoke not, and Caroline, as she +read the reproach, the doubt expressed upon his features, for a moment +felt her natural pride swelling high within her, that he could for one +minute permit a doubt of her truth to enter his mind; but her +resolution, her mother's advice, the observation of Lady Gertrude, all +rose to combat with returning pride, and they conquered. + +"Eugene, dearest Eugene," she said, as she extended her hand towards +him, "you have, indeed, every reason to look disturbed. In my deep +anxiety for her whom I so long loved as my friend, I forgot that my +agitation might indeed confirm the unworthy tale you heard. Forgive me, +Eugene; I know that I have pained you, but, indeed, I meant it not. If +Lord Alphingham did cross my mind, it was in detestation, in abhorrence, +that he should thus have acted. I trembled for Annie, for her alone, for +the fearful fate that, when Lord Henry first spoke, I believed must be +her lot. Were I at liberty to disclose all, you would not wonder such +should have been my feelings, Eugene," she added, in an accent of gentle +reproach. "Must I indeed solemnly and sacredly assure you, that my +agitation was occasioned by no lingering affection for Lord Alphingham? +will nothing else satisfy you? Is it kind, is it generous thus to doubt +me?" + +Softened at once, ashamed of his own jealous tendency, the young Earl +could only implore her forgiveness, assure her he had not the faintest +doubt remaining; and suggesting, air would revive her sooner than +anything, he drew her to the open window of the adjoining room, which +looked out on the little garden, and there they remained in apparently +earnest conversation, till Caroline, to her extreme astonishment, was +summoned by her cousin to luncheon, and Lord St. Eval suddenly +discovered he had permitted the whole morning to slip away in idleness, +when he imagined he had so very much to do. + +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton were more grieved than surprised at the +intelligence they had heard; but in what manner to act, what measures to +take they knew not. Grahame was expected to arrive in England on the +morrow or the next day at the farthest, and his agony they dreaded to +witness; they feared lest reports should reach him ere he was in any way +prepared, and Mr. Hamilton determined on travelling instantly to Dover, +that he might be there ready to receive him, and console to the best of +his ability this mistaken but truly affectionate father. Percy, rousing +himself, entered with activity into all his father's plans; but Mrs. +Hamilton fancied that he too had some plan to follow up, which his +absence two or three days from home confirmed. Nor was it idle sympathy +she felt; that same day she sought the residence of Lady Helen. + +Scarcely ever did she enter that house without being struck by the +melancholy pervading it. Wrapped in her own pleasures, her own desires +and amusements, Annie never cast one thought on her mother, whose +declining health it would have been her duty to tend and soothe; indeed +she scarcely ever entered her room, and believing her parent's ailments +were all fancy, made it a rule to take no notice of them. Cecil liked +not gloom and quiet, and his fashionable cousins occupied almost all his +time. He could not comprehend, much less return the deep affection his +mother felt for him; and Lilla, whose naturally warm heart and right +principles would have made her an affectionate attendant on her mother's +couch, was seldom at home to perform her part. But already had Lady +Helen felt the difference a year's residence with Mrs. Douglas had made +in her younger girl; already her indolent nature felt the comfort of her +presence, and bitterly regretted when her short vacations were at an +end, for then she was indeed alone. + +On being admitted, Mrs. Hamilton fancied somewhat eagerly, the first +person she encountered at Lady Helen's was her young friend, clad, it +seemed, for walking, with traces of anxiety and sorrow written on her +countenance. + +"The very person I was about to seek," she exclaimed, in a voice of +intense relief, springing down the stairs to reach her friend. "Dearest +Mrs. Hamilton, mamma--Annie--" The words choked her, and she burst into +tears. + +"Compose yourself, love, I know all; only tell me how your mother bears +the shock," whispered Mrs. Hamilton, instantly penetrating at once the +truth, that either the report had reached Lady Helen, or she had +received the intelligence direct from her daughter; and anxious to +escape the curious eyes of the domestics, who were in the hall, she +hastily yet kindly drew the weeping Lilla to the nearest parlour, and, +closing the door, succeeded in hearing all she desired. Lilla said, her +mother, only an hour before, had received a letter from Annie, briefly +announcing her marriage, and informing her they intended very shortly to +embark for the Netherlands from Leith, thence to make a tour in Germany +and Italy, which would prevent their returning to England for some time, +when she hoped all present irritation at her conduct would have +subsided; that her father's severity had tended to this step. Had he +been kind, and like other fathers, she would have sacrificed her own +desires, conscious that his reason for prohibiting her union with +Alphingham was good, however it might be secret; but when from her +childhood her every wish had been unreasonably thwarted, she was +compelled to choose in such a case for herself. She should be sorry to +live in enmity with her father, but even if she did, she never could +regret the step she had taken. To her mother she wrote as if assured of +her forgiveness, or rather her continued favour; forgiveness she did not +seem to think it at all necessary to ask, saying, she was sure her kind +and indulgent mother would not regret her union with Lord Alphingham, +when she solemnly declared it had made her happier than she had ever +been before. Such Lilla said were the contents of her letter; but the +warm-hearted girl could not refer without indignation to the utter want +of affection which breathed throughout. Her mother, Lilla continued to +say, had been in a most alarming state from the time she received the +letter, but she fancied occasioned more by the dread of what her father +would say on his return, than from Annie's conduct. + +When Mrs. Hamilton saw Lady Helen, she felt that Lilla was right. The +unhappy mother reproached her own carelessness, indolence, and Annie's +ingratitude, but it was evident the dread of her husband was uppermost +in her mind--a dread which made her so extremely ill, from a succession +of violent and uncontrolled hysterics, that Mrs. Hamilton did not leave +her the whole of that day; nor would she permit the unhappy father to +enter his wife's apartment on his return, till she had exacted from him +a promise to forbear all reproaches towards his suffering wife, all +allusions to the past. + +With the stern brevity of the injured, Grahame addressed his disobedient +child. His forgiveness and his blessing he sent, though he said she had +asked for neither; that he bore no enmity to her, he wrote; his home and +his heart were ever open to receive her, should she again require the +protection of the one, the affection of the other. She had chosen for +herself; linked her fate with one against whom many tongues had spoken, +and he could only pray that her present happiness might never change. +Lord Alphingham he did not name. Lady Helen's letter was a curious +mixture of reproach and affection, complaint and congratulation; and +Annie might have found it difficult to discover in what manner she was +affected towards the Viscount, or with regard to the elopement itself. +Perhaps of all the letters she received from home, Lilla's was the most +irritating to her, for it was written in all the bitter indignation, the +unchecked reproaches of a young and ardent spirit, in whose eyes the +heartlessness of her letter was inexcusable, and she wrote as she +thought. Annie, as might have been expected, deigned her no reply. A few +languidly written letters her mother received from her during her tour; +but the chief of her correspondence was reserved for Miss Malison and +the lady who had so ably assisted their secret plans. The friendly +influence of Mr. Hamilton succeeded, after a few days, in restoring his +friend to comparative outward composure, although the wound within, he +too sadly felt, was beyond his power to heal. + +A few days passed in peace. Mrs. Hamilton and her family were +anticipating with pleasure the quiet happiness of Oakwood, and the event +then to take place. Scarcely a week intervened before their departure, +when they were one afternoon startled by the appearance of Grahame, +whose countenance bore the pallid hue of death, and every action denoted +the most fearful agitation. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, Caroline and St. +Eval, were alone present, and they gazed on him in unfeigned alarm. + +"Hamilton, I start for Brussels to-night," was his salutation, as he +entered. + +"Brussels!" repeated Mr. Hamilton. "Grahame, you are beside yourself. +What affairs can call you to Brussels so suddenly?" + +"Affairs--business; aye, of such weight, I cannot rest till they are +attended to. Hamilton, you are astonished; you think me mad; oh, would +to God I were!" and striking his forehead with his clenched hand, he +paced the room in agony. + +Ere his friend could approach or address him, he suddenly paused before +Caroline, who was watching him in alarm and commiseration, and grasping +her arm, with a pressure that pained her, he said, in a voice which +blanched her cheek with horror-- + +"Hamilton, look on this girl, and, as you love me, answer me. Could you +be a Roman father, did you see her dishonoured,--the victim, the wilful +victim of a base, a treacherous, miserable villain?--say, could you wash +away the blackening stain with blood--with her blood--or his, or both? +Speak to me--counsel me. My child, my child!" he groaned aloud. + +"Grahame, you are ill; my dear friend, you know not what you say," +exclaimed Mr. Hamilton, terrified both at his wildness and his words. +"Come with me till this strange mood has passed; I entreat it as a +favour--come." + +"Passed--till this mood has passed! Hamilton, it will never pass till +the grave has closed over Annie and myself. Oh, Hamilton, my friend, I +had reconciled myself to this marriage; taught myself to believe that, +as his wife, she might be happy; and--oh, God! can I say the words?--she +is not his wife--he is already married." His trembling limbs refused +support, and he sunk, overcome by his emotion, on a chair. Without a +minute's pause, a moment's hesitation, and ere her father could find +words to reply, Caroline sprung forward, and kneeling beside the +wretched father, she seized his hand-- + +"Be calm, be comforted, dearest Mr. Grahame," she exclaimed, in a voice +that caused him to gaze at her with astonishment. "It is a mistaken tale +you have heard; a cruel falsehood, to disturb your peace. Lord +Alphingham was married, but Annie is now his lawful wedded wife; the +partner of his youth, the devoted woman whom for eight years he +deserted, is no more. She died the day preceding that which united Lord +Alphingham to your child. I speak truth, Mr. Grahame; solemnly, +sacredly, I affirm it. Percy will tell you more; I was pledged to +secrecy. On her deathbed she demanded a solemn promise from all who knew +her tale, never to divulge it, lest it should prove to the discredit of +her cruel husband, whom her last accents blessed. I promised Percy it +should be sacred, unless an emergency demanded it. Be comforted, Mr. +Grahame, indeed, I speak the truth. Lord Alphingham was free, restrained +by no tie, when he was united to your child." Rapidly, hurriedly, she +had spoken, for she trembled at the wild gaze Grahame had fixed upon +her. Caroline's voice rung clear and distinct upon his ear, and every +word brought comfort, still he spoke not; but when she ceased, when +slowly, more impressively her last words were spoken, he uttered a faint +cry, and folding her slight form convulsively to his heart, sobbed like +an infant on her shoulder. Thoughts unutterable thronged the minds of +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton as they too listened with fascinated eagerness to +Caroline's words; thoughts, not only of the present but the past, rushed +quickly to their minds. A year previous Lord Alphingham's wife still +lived; though he, villain as he was, had heeded not the sacred tie. Well +could they enter into the blessed relief her words had brought to the +distracted father. Mr. Hamilton permitted some minutes to elapse in +silence, and then gently withdrawing Caroline from Grahame's still +convulsive hold, said a few words, in a voice which, though low, +expressed that kindly sympathy which seldom fails to reach the inmost +soul; and finally succeeded in passing his arm through that of his +friend, and leading him to an adjoining room, where, after a time, +Grahame conquered his agitation sufficiently to give a connected account +of the means through which he had learned the information which had so +distracted him. Caroline's words and the influence of his friend +restored him to comparative composure; but all was not at peace within +until Percy had obeyed the summons of his father, and the information of +his sister was confirmed in every point by him. He related the tale of +Mrs. Amesfort, with which our readers are already well acquainted, with +the addition of her death, of which the letter he received a few days +previous had informed him. Many affecting interviews he had had with +her, in which she spoke, of her husband, her mother, her child, so +fondly, that the tears often started to the eyes of Percy, though her +own were dry. In parting from him, she had again implored him not to +divulge her secret, unless the interest of her child demanded it, or he +saw urgent occasion. + +"Let not the breath of calumny sully the name of my child," she said, +grasping his hand with a painful effort. "Let her not be looked on as a +child of shame, when her birth is as pure and noble as any in the land. +If her birth be questioned, let the whole world know she is the daughter +of Lord Alphingham. In my mother's care is the certificate of my +marriage, also of the christening of my Agnes. But if nothing be +demanded, if her lot be happy, it is better both for father and daughter +that they remain unknown to each other." + +Percy had made the solemn promise she demanded, but the remembrance of +her pale features, her drooping form, had haunted him on his return +home, and caused that deep gloom his family had remarked. It was more +than a week after Mrs. Amesfort's death, before her afflicted mother +could write the tidings to the young man, who, on hearing of Annie's +conduct, had instantly and actively set about obtaining the exact date +of the unfortunate lady's death, and also that of the Viscount's hasty +marriage in Scotland. The result was most satisfactory; rather more than +a week had elapsed between the two events, and his marriage with Annie +was, consequently, sacred and binding. Percy also said, Mrs. Morley had +mentioned her intention of instantly returning to Ireland with the +little Agnes, from whom she fervently prayed she might never be +compelled to part. + +Believed, and truly thankful, Grahame consulted with his friends on the +best plan to pursue to silence the rumours which, having overheard in a +public coffeehouse, would, he had no doubt, be immediately circulated +over the town. Mrs. Morley said, she had written to inform Lord +Alphingham of the death of his broken-hearted wife, enclosing one from +the ill-fated Agnes herself. He was, therefore, perfectly aware of the +validity of his second marriage, for Percy had inquired and found the +letter had been forwarded; there was no need of communication with him +on that point. Grahame's first care was to travel to Scotland, and +obtain the registry of their marriage; his next, to proceed to Brussels, +with Mr. Hamilton, and coolly and decisively inform Lord Alphingham +that, unless the ceremony was publicly solemnized a second time, in his +presence, and before proper witnesses, other proceedings would be +entered upon against him. Astonished and somewhat alarmed as Lord and +Lady Alphingham were at his unexpected appearance, the former had too +many sins on his conscience to submit to a public _exposĂ©_, which he +might justly fear was intended in this threat, and, with great apparent +willingness, he consented. The ceremony was again performed; Grahame +possessed himself of the certificate, and left Brussels, with the +half-formed resolution that, while Lord Alphingham lived, he would never +see his child again. The death of the Right Honourable Viscountess +Alphingham, and the subsequent marriage in Scotland of the Eight +Honourable Lord Viscount Alphingham with Miss Grahame, appeared in all +the newspapers. The splendour of the second solemnization of their +nuptials in Brussels was the next theme of wonder and gossip, and by the +time that subject was exhausted, London had become deserted, and Lord +and Lady Alphingham might probably have returned to the metropolis +without question or remark; but such was not Lord Alphingham's +intention. He feared that probably were his history publicly known he +might be shunned for the deceit he had displayed; and he easily obtained +Annie's glad consent to fix their residence for a few years in Paris. +Irritated as in all probability he was, when he found himself again +fettered, yet he so ably concealed this irritation, that his wife +suspected it not, and for a time she was happy. + +As Lord and Lady Alphingham are no longer concerned in our tale, having +nothing more in common with those in whom, we trust, our readers are +much more interested, we may here formally dismiss them in a few words. +They lived, but if true happiness dwells only with the virtuous and +good, with the upright and the noble, it gilded not their lot; but if +those who are well acquainted with the morality of the higher classes of +the French capital can pronounce that it dwells there, then, indeed, +might they be said to possess it, for such was their lives. They +returned not again to England, but lived in France and Italy, +alternately. Alphingham, callous to every better and softer feeling, +might have been happy, but not such was the fate of Annie. Bitterly, ere +she died, did she regret her folly and disobedience; remorse was +sometimes busy within, though no actual guilt dimmed her career: she +drowned the voice of conscience in the vortex of frivolity and fashion. +But the love she bore for Alphingham was the instrument of retribution, +her husband neglected, despised, and frequently deserted her. Let no +woman unite herself with sin, in the vain hope of transforming it to +virtue. Such thoughts had not, indeed, been Annie's, when wilfully she +sought her fate. She knew not the man she had chosen for her husband; +she disregarded the warnings she had heard. Fatal delusion! she found, +too late, the fate her will had woven was formed of knotty threads, the +path that she had sought beset with thorns, from which she could not +break. No children blessed her lot, and it was better thus--for they +would have found but little happiness. The fate of Lord Alphingham's +child, the little Agnes, was truly happy in her own innocence; she lived +on for many years in ignorance of her real rank and the title of her +father, under the careful guidance of that relative to whom her mother's +last words had tenderly consigned her. + +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton remained but little longer in town; Caroline's +_trousseau_ was quite completed, for but very few weeks now intervened +ere her marriage. Lady Gertrude had devoted herself to the young Earl, +and remained with him superintending the improvements and embellishments +of his beautiful estate, Castle Terryn, in the vicinity of the Tamar, on +the Cornwall side, which was being prepared with the greatest taste and +splendour. Lady Gertrude was to remain with her brother till the week +previous to the wedding, when she joined her family at Oakwood, where +they had been staying since their departure from London, at the earnest +persuasions of both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton. Seldom had the banks of the +placid Dart been so gay as they were on this occasion; the beautiful +villas scattered around were all taken by the friends of the parties +about to be so nearly connected. Rejoicings were not only confined to +the higher class; the poor, for many miles round, hailed the expected +marriage of Miss Hamilton as an occasion of peculiar and individual +felicity. Blessings on her lot, prayers for her welfare, that Lord St. +Eval might prove himself worthy of her, were murmured in many a rustic +cot, and every one was employed in earnest thought as to the best, the +most respectful mode of testifying their humble sympathy in the +happiness of their benefactors. Such were the feelings with which high +and low regarded the prosperity of the good. + + +END OF VOL. I. + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Mother's Recompense, Volume I. +by Grace Aguilar + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 12361 *** diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..98831d0 --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #12361 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/12361) diff --git a/old/12361-8.txt b/old/12361-8.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..7956e7f --- /dev/null +++ b/old/12361-8.txt @@ -0,0 +1,10901 @@ +Project Gutenberg's The Mother's Recompense, Volume I., by Grace Aguilar + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Mother's Recompense, Volume I. + A Sequel to Home Influence in Two Volumes. + +Author: Grace Aguilar + +Release Date: May 16, 2004 [EBook #12361] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MOTHER'S RECOMPENSE, VOLUME I. *** + + + + +Produced by Charles Franks and the Distributed Proofreaders Team + + + + +THE MOTHER'S RECOMPENSE; + + +A SEQUEL TO HOME INFLUENCE. + + +BY GRACE AGUILAR. + + + + +IN TWO VOLUMES. + +VOL. I. + + +LEIPZIG + +BERNHARD TAUCHNITZ + +1859. + + + + +PREFACE. + + +The domestic story of "Home Influence," and its Sequel, the present +volume, were written in the early part of the year 1836, and the entire +work was completed when its author was little above the age of nineteen; +and, although no portion of it was published till some years after its +composition, but little alteration was made in the original plan. + +The labours of my dear child were unceasing, and from the hour when she +could read, it may truly be stated that she learned to write; her +contributions to the current literature of the day, her valuable works +upon religious subjects, and others of a lighter character, most of +which have been reprinted in other lands, all testify to a mind of no +common stamp; and here, in reply to numerous questions relative to her +literary remains, I may state that Grace Aguilar has left many excellent +works in manuscript, both in prose and verse; some of which may, at a +future day, be presented to the public. + +I have been induced to publish "The Mother's Recompense," in compliance +with the repeated solicitations of many friends, but in doing so I feel +it incumbent on me to state that, unlike its predecessor, it has not +received the advantage of that correction, which later years and ripened +judgment would doubtless have cast around it. A long and fatal illness +prevented its revision for the press; the circumstances of which will be +found detailed in a short memoir, accompanying the last edition of "Home +Influence." The universal voice of praise, which attended the +publication of that work, it was not permitted her to enjoy,--an +all-wise Creator called her to himself. + +It was ever my dear child's wish to aid, by the example of her pen, the +education of the Heart. It was her desire, in the truthful +exemplification of character, to point out to the youthful of her own +sex the paths of rectitude and virtue. The same kindly love--the same +heartfelt charity--the same spirit of devotion, which breathes through +every line in "Home Influence," will be found pervading the pages of the +present work. + +If, then, the Home Education of the Hamilton Family be well traced and +faithfully delineated in "Home Influence, a Tale for Mothers and +Daughters," its _effect_ will be found illustrated in the "Mother's +Recompense;" there, as its dear author writes, will still further be +portrayed the cares, anxieties, and ultimate reward of maternal love. + +SARAH AGUILAR. + +_December_, 1850. + + + + +THE MOTHER'S RECOMPENSE + +VOL. I. + + + + +CHAPTER I. + + +_From Emmeline Hamilton to Mary Greville_. + +London, January, 18-- + +At length, dearest Mary, I may write to you; at length indulge my +long-controlled wishes. My conscience has given me permission now, +though I once thought I never could again. We parted in August, and it +is now January; and except during our little tour, you have not had one +line from me, but very many more than one from Caroline and Ellen. I +used to wrong them, but I am glad I adhered to mamma's advice and my +resolution, painful as it has been; for it did seem hard that I, who +consider myself even more my dear Mary's own friend, should not address +you when my sister and cousin did. And now to explain this riddle, for +though mamma has excused my silence to you, I am quite sure she has not +told you the real truth. She would not expose my silly weakness, and +therefore prepare yourself for a most humiliating confession, which +will, in all probability, lower me ten degrees in your estimation. +However, truth must he told, and so it shall be with all the necessary +regularity and precision. _You_ know, almost better than any one else, +how very much I disliked the thought of leaving dear happy Oakwood, and +residing any part of the year in London. You often used to warn me, when +I have thus spoken, against permitting such fancies to obtain too much +dominion; but I did not follow your advice, dear Mary, but indulged them +till, of course, they became so heightened that the last month of our +sojourn at Oakwood was embittered by the anticipation. I saw you thought +me foolish, and I knew that mamma and papa's plans could not be altered +to please my fancy, and that my confessed distaste to them would give +pain to both: therefore, I concealed my dislike, but instead of doing +all I could to conquer it, encouraged every gloomy anticipation to the +very utmost. I found, during our delightful tour through the south of +England, I could enjoy myself, but still the thoughts of London, and +masters, and strangers, and the fancy our style of living would be so +different in the metropolis to what it was in Oakwood, and that I should +not see nearly as much of mamma, all chose to come, like terrifying +spectres, to scare away the present pleasure. + +We visited Oxford, although completely out of our way, in order that we +might see the residence of my brothers. There Percy's wild mirth and +eloquent descriptions partly banished my ill-humour, but as I neared +London all my fancied evils returned to me again. When we first arrived, +which was in September, this huge city was, comparatively speaking, a +desert; for all the fashionables were out ruralizing. Mamma was not, I +believe, sorry for this, for she wished us to have full six or seven +months' hard study before she entered at all into society. Ellen and I, +of course, will have more, but Caroline is to make her regular _entrée_ +in March or April, and therefore must be drilled accordingly. First-rate +masters were instantly engaged; indeed, papa had written to many before +we arrived, that no time should be lost, and as almost all their pupils +were from London, we had the choice of hours, which was very agreeable, +although at that time I did not feel inclined to think anything +agreeable, being accustomed to no instruction save that bestowed by Miss +Harcourt and mamma; professors of music, drawing, French, Italian, +German (which Caroline is seized with a violent fancy to acquire, and +which I deign to learn, because I should like to read Klopstock in the +original), and even what I term a lady professor of embroidery, which +Caroline has succeeded in tormenting mamma to let her have--_entre +nous_, it is only because she has taught Annie Grahame; all these, my +dear Mary, presented a most formidable array, and for the first month I +did not choose to profit by their instructions in the least. I gave full +vent to all the dislike I felt to them. I encouraged indolence to a +degree that frequently occasioned a reproof from Miss Harcourt. I could +not bear their mode of teaching; the attention so many things required +was in my present state a most painful exertion, and I almost made an +inward determination to show mamma that all her endeavours were lost on +me. I would not learn when everything was so changed. Do not throw away +my letter in despair of your friend, dearest Mary; only read to the end, +and perhaps my character may be in some measure redeemed. There was a +weight on my spirits I could not, because I would not, remove. I became +ill-tempered and petulant without cause; before papa and mamma I tried +to restrain it, but did not always succeed. Percy and Herbert both +spoke to me on this unwarrantable change; and I think almost for the +first time in my life I saw Percy seriously angry with me, for I had +even shown my irritation at his interference. I told him I had a right +to act and feel as I pleased. Herbert looked sorry, and desisted in his +reasonings when he found I would not listen. Percy's evident irritation +and the reproaches of my own conscience added not a little to my +uncomfortable feelings, as you may suppose. I looked back to what I had +been at Oakwood, and the contrast of my past and present self really +gave me much cause for misery. It was just before my brothers returned +to college I wrote to you a long, very long letter, in which I gave more +than enough vent to my silly, I should say sinful feelings. Several +hours I had employed in its composition, and to obtain these, neglected +my exercises, etc, for my masters, and caused more than one for several +days to make a formal complaint of my indolence and carelessness to Miss +Harcourt. Her remonstrances, I am ashamed to confess, only had the +effect of increasing my ill-temper. Well; I concluded at length my +epistle to you, which, had you received it, would have been a trial of +patience indeed; for it consisted of ten or twelve closely-written +pages, in which I had so magnified my feelings of discontent and +unhappiness, that any one must have fancied I had not one single +blessing left. I was folding and preparing to seal it, when mamma +entered my room. I must tell you that as yet I had not had one reproof +from her lips, though I am quite sure I deserved it long before; I used +to see her look very grieved at any burst of petulance from me, but she +had never spoken on the subject. I almost trembled when she appeared, +for I knew that morning Miss Harcourt had said she must inform her of +Mons. Deville and Signor Rozzi's continued complaints. Without entering +on that subject, however, she sat down by me, and with one of her own +sweet smiles, which reproached me a great deal more than words, she +asked me if I really were going to seal and send that long letter of +confidence to you without having shown or told any part of it to her. +She might well ask, dear Mary, for I had never written a line before +which I had kept from her; but my conscience told me she would not, +could not approve of this, and therefore I certainly did wish I could +have sent it without telling her anything about it. What deceit, too! I +hear you exclaim. Yes, dear Mary; and before this tale of shame is over, +you will see still more clearly how one fault makes many. I did not +answer her question, but remained sulkily silent. + +"Will my Emmeline think me a harsh intruder on her private thoughts, if +I say I cannot let this letter go till I have seen at least some parts +of its contents?" she said very mildly, but so firmly I had no power to +resist her; and when she asked if I would not, as I always did, read her +some portions, I answered, pettishly, if she read any she might as well +read all. She looked deeply grieved, and my heart painfully smote me the +moment the words were said; but I was too proud at that moment to show +any marks of contrition, and all the time she was reading I continued +working myself up to increased ill-humour. + +"Are you indeed so very unhappy, my dear Emmeline?" were the only words +mamma said, as she laid down, the last sheet and looked in my face, +with a tear trembling in her eye. I turned away, for I felt too +irritated and cross to give way to the emotion I always feel when I see +her grieved, and I was determined not to answer. "And do you prefer," +she continued, "seeking the sympathy of a young girl like yourself to +that of a mother, who has always endeavoured not only to sympathise +with, but to soothe the sorrows of her children?" Still I would not +answer, and she added, mildly, "Do you not think, Emmeline, Mary would +have been better pleased if you had written to her rather in a lighter +strain? do you not think, if you were to try and shake off these painful +fancies, you could write another and less desponding letter--one that I +might give you my full and free permission to send, which, sorry as I am +to say it, I cannot with this?" + +Mild as were her words and manner, the import of what she said put the +finishing stroke to my ill-temper. "If I may not write as I like, I will +not write at all," I passionately exclaimed, and seizing the sheet +nearest to me tore it asunder, and would have done the same with the +rest, had not mamma gently laid her hand on my arm, uttering my name in +an accent of surprise and sorrow; my irritable and sinful feelings found +vent in a most violent flood of tears. + +Will you not think, dearest Mary, I am writing of Caroline, and not of +myself; does it not resemble the scenes of my sister's childhood? Can +you believe that this is an account of your Emmeline, whose sweetness of +temper and gentleness of disposition you have so often extolled? But it +was I who thus forgot myself--I, who once believed nothing ever could +make me passionate or angry, and in one minute I was both--had excited +myself till I became so even against my nature, and with whom?--even my +mother, my kind, devoted mother, who has ever done so much for me, whom +in my childhood, when I knew her worth much less than I do now, I had +never caused to shed a tear. Oh, Mary, I cannot tell you what I felt the +moment those passionate words escaped me. I may truly say I did not cry +from anger, but from the most bitter, the most painful self-reproach. I +think her usual penetration must have discovered this, for if she had +thought my tears were really those of passion, she would not, could not +have acted as she did. + +She drew me gently to her, and kissed me without speaking. I threw my +arms round her neck, and in a voice almost choked by sobs, implored her +again and again to forgive me; that I did not mean to answer her so +disrespectfully--that I knew I had become a very wicked girl, but that I +really did feel very unhappy. For a few minutes she was silent, and I +could see was struggling to suppress the tears my unusual conduct had +occasioned. I will make no apology, dearest Mary, for entering on such +minute details; for I know how you love my mother, and that every word +she says is _almost_ as precious to you as to her own children--_quite_ +it cannot be; and I give you this account also, that you may know me as +I am, and not imagine I am so free from faults as I know you once +believed me. Oh, when I have looked back on that day, I have felt so +painfully humiliated, I would gladly banish the recollection; but it is +better for me to remember it, lest I should fancy myself better than I +am. Every word she said in that gentle and persuasive tone was engraved +upon my heart, even as she spoke. She easily and fully convinced me of +my sinfulness in thus permitting imaginary evils to make me so +miserable: for that they were but imaginary it was easy to discover. Not +a single blessing could I say I had lost. All I loved were around me, in +health and happiness--every comfort of life was the same; and could it +be possible, mamma said, that the mere departure from a favourite +residence, and only for a few months, could render me so completely +blind to the many blessings my Heavenly Father had scattered around me. +As she spoke, a film appeared removed from my eyes, and the enormity of +my conduct stood for the first time in its true colours before me. I +saw--I knew how sinful I had been; and bitterly I regretted that I had +not confessed every feeling to mamma, instead of hiding them, as I had +done, in my own heart, and brooding on them till it became a kind of +pleasure to do so, and till fancied evils produced real ones. I wept +bitterly while she spoke, for to find how completely I had created +misery for myself was no agreeable matter of reflection, and my remorse +was heightened when mamma said, "You have disappointed us not a little, +my dear Emmeline; for I will no longer conceal from you that the little +tour we took on our way to London was originally planned by your father +and myself, to reconcile you to a change of residence. We saw how much +you regretted leaving Oakwood; nor did we wonder at it, for such +feelings were most natural to one of your disposition; and therefore, +instead of travelling direct, and suddenly changing the scenes of our +beautiful Devonshire for the confinement of this huge city, we hoped by +visiting various places, and giving you new objects of reflection, to +lessen your regret, and make the change of residence less painfully +abrupt." As well as I could, I expressed my sorrow and repentance, and +promised to use every endeavour to atone for the past, and become all +that she and papa wished me. + +"I believe you, my own Emmeline," my kind mother said, as she again +kissed me, and her voice was no longer so sorrowfully grave as it had +been at first. "I am sure, now you know all the pain you were inflicting +on both your parents, every effort will be put in force to remove it." +Did I deserve this speech, dear Mary? I do not think I did; for I often +saw by mamma's countenance I had grieved her, and yet made no effort to +control myself, and so I told her. She smiled her own sweet, dear smile +of approbation, and thanking me for my candour, said-- + +"If I say that by indulging in these gloomy fancies and appearing +discontented, and repining when so many blessings are around you, my +Emmeline will be doing her mother a real injury, by rendering my +character questionable, not only in the eyes of the world, but of my +most valued friends, will she not do all in her power to become her own +light-hearted self again?" + +"Injuring your character, dearest mother!" I exclaimed, with much +surprise; "in what manner?" + +"I will tell you, my love," she replied; "there are many, not only of my +acquaintances, but my friends, those whose opinions I really value, who +believe I have been acting very wrongly all these years, in never having +permitted you and Caroline to visit London. They think by this strict +retirement I have quite unfitted you both for the station your rank +demands you should fill. That by constantly living alone with us, and +never mingling in society, you have imbibed notions that, to say the +least, may be old-fashioned and romantic, and which will make you both +feel uncomfortable when you are introduced in London. These fears never +entered my mind; I wished you to receive ideas that were somewhat +different to the generality of Fashion's dictates, and I did not doubt +but that the uncomfortable feeling, against which the letters of my +friends often warned me, would very quickly be removed. But since we +have been here--I do not wish to grieve you more, my dear Emmeline--I +must confess your conduct has been productive to me of the most painful +self-reproach. I thought, indeed, my friends were right, and that for +years I had been acting on an injudicious plan, and that instead of my +measures tending to future happiness, they were only productive of pain +and misery, which, had I done as other mothers of my station, might have +been avoided." + +"Oh! do not, pray do not think so," I exclaimed, for she had spoken so +sorrowfully, I could not bear it. "I formed my own misery, dearest +mother; you had nothing to do with it." + +"You think so now, my love," she answered, with her usual fondness; "but +if my friends see you gloomy and sad, and evidently discontented, +longing for pleasures which are not offered to you in London, only +dwelling on visions of the past, and notions tending to the indulgence +of romance, what will they think? will not my judgment be called in +question? and more, they know how very much I prefer a country to a +London life, domestic pleasures, to those of society, and they may +imagine, and with some probability, that to indulge my selfish wishes, +I have disregarded the real interests of my children." + +"They cannot, they will not think so," I passionately said. "They can +never have known you who form such conclusions." Would you not have +agreed with me, dear Mary, and can you not fancy the wretchedness +mamma's words inflicted? + +"My love," she replied, with a smile, "they will not fancy they do not +know me; they will rather imagine they must have been deceived in their +opinion; that I am not what I may have appeared to them some few years +ago. The character of a mother, my Emmeline, is frequently judged of by +the conduct of her children; and such conclusions are generally correct, +though, of course, as there are exceptions to every rule, there are to +this, and many a mother may have been unjustly injured in the estimation +of the world, by the thoughtless or criminal conduct of a wilful and +disobedient child. I have been so completely a stranger to London +society the last sixteen years, that my character and conduct depend +more upon you and Caroline to be raised or lowered in the estimation of +my friends and also of the world, than on any of the young people with +whom you may mingle. On which, then, will my Emmeline decide,--to +indulge in these gloomy fancies, and render herself ill both in health +and temper, as well as exposing her mother to censure and suspicion; or +will she, spite of the exertion and pain it may occasion, shake off this +lethargy, recall all her natural animation and cheerfulness, and with +her own bright smile restore gladness to the hearts of her parents?" + +I could not speak in answer to this appeal, dear Mary, but I clung +weeping to mamma's neck. I never till that moment knew all my +responsibility, how much depended on my conduct; but at that moment I +inwardly vowed that never, never should my conduct injure that dear +devoted mother, who endeavoured so fondly to soothe my grief, and check +my bitter tears; who had done so much for me, who had devoted herself so +completely to her children. Mentally I resolved that nothing should be +wanting on my part to render her character as exalted in the eyes of the +world as it was in mine. I could not bear to think how ungratefully I +had acted, and I cried till I made my head and mamma's heart ache; but I +could not long resist her fond caresses, her encouraging words, and +before she left me I could even smile. + +"And what am I to say," she said, with her usual playfulness, "of the +sad complaints that I have received the last few days from Miss +Harcourt, that she does not know what has come to you, from Mons. +Deville and Signer Rozzi? Now what am I to say or do to prove that this +Mademoiselle Emmeline does like Italian, and is not ill, as our polite +professors fancy? must I lecture as I did when she was an idle little +girl, and liked her play better than her studies? Suppose these +gentlemen are asked, which in all probability they certainly are, what +sort of pupils Mrs. Hamilton's daughters are; they ought to be something +out of the way, for we hear she has instructed them principally herself. +What answer will be given, what conclusions drawn, if you do not exert +yourself and prove that you can learn as well, when you like, as your +sister, and even quicker than your cousin?" + +I felt so ashamed, dearest Mary, that I concealed my face on her +shoulder, and would not even look up to promise amendment, for I felt I +was not certain of myself; but when mamma spoke of my letter to you, and +asked me if I still wished to send it, or if I would not write another, +I made a desperate effort, and answered as well as I could-- + +"I will not write again to Mary, dear mamma, till I have conquered all +these silly and sinful feelings, and can write as usual; and to be quite +sure of myself, that I may not break my resolution, I promise you that +for six months I will not give myself the pleasure of addressing her, +and if even at the end of that time you do not think I have sufficiently +recovered my senses, which certainly appear to have deserted me, you +shall increase at your will my time of probation; I deserve some +privation for my ungrateful conduct, and the not writing to Mary now is +the greatest I can think of." I tried to appear very heroic as I made +this speech, but with all my efforts I completely failed. Mamma looked +at me a moment in surprise, but then, with more than usual fondness, she +strained me to her heart, and I felt a tear fall on my cheek. + +"My own sweet child, my darling Emmeline!" she exclaimed, "I did not +expect this offered sacrifice, but I will accept it, my own love, and +let its pain he soothed to your affectionate heart by the knowledge that +in making it, you have given me the purest, most delicious sense of +pleasure you could bestow. We will not say six months," she added, more +playfully, "we will see what the middle or end of January brings. You +will then still have nearly four months to redeem your character. I have +not the slightest doubt that even before that period my Emmeline will be +herself." Oh, Mary, I felt so very happy as she thus spoke, that I +thought I must find it very easy to conquer myself, but I was mistaken, +painfully mistaken; I had encouraged despondency and gloom for so long a +period, that it required every exertion, in the very least, to subdue +it. I had chosen to waste my time, and be inattentive to all the means +of improvement which were offered me, and to command my attention +sufficiently to regain the good opinion of our sage professors was most +disagreeably difficult; but I was no longer afraid, to encounter mamma's +sorrowful or reproving glance, as I had been before, and her fond +encouragement and the marks of approval which both she and papa +bestowed, when I could not but feel I had done little to deserve them, +lightened the labour of my task, and by causing me to wish earnestly to +deserve their kindness, increased my efforts; and at length, dearest +Mary, these miserable feelings so completely departed from me, that I +was surprised to perceive how very nearly I could be as happy in London +as at dear Oakwood; quite as happy is impossible, because I feel more +and more how very much I prefer a quiet domestic life in the country to +London and society. You will perhaps smile as mamma does, and say I am +not introduced yet, and then I may change my mind; but I do not think I +shall. She prefers the country, so it will not be very strange if I +should; but when I see how completely, and yet how cheerfully, she has +given up her favourite residence and employments, for the interests and +happiness of her children, I feel ashamed at the egregious selfishness +which has been mine. Oh, Mary, when shall I ever be like mamma? when can +I ever be worthy of half, nay, one quarter of that respectful admiration +which is bestowed upon her, even by those whose principles and conduct +are directly opposite? + +In her conversations with me she had spoken more of the opinion of the +world than she ever did at Oakwood, and one day venturing to notice it, +as being contrary to that which she so carefully instilled, that to God +and our conscience we should alone be answerable for our conduct, she +answered, with a smile-- + +"I have been long expecting this remark, my dear Emmeline, and I have +endeavoured to be prepared with an answer. To our Father in Heaven and +to our own conscience we must still look for our guide in life; that not +in one thing must we transgress the love and duty we owe our Maker, or +disregard the warning or reproaches of our hearts; but still, mingling +in the world as it is undoubtedly our duty to do--for as I have often +told you, we do not live for ourselves, but for others--we must have due +regard in minor things to the opinions of those with whom we associate. +When a woman has once set up for an Independent, when, scorning the +opinion of the world, she walks forth conscious in her own integrity and +virtue, though no stain may have sullied her conduct or name, though she +may be innately amiable and good, yet every gentler female will shrink +from such a character, and tremble lest they should become like her. +Women are dependent beings; in Infinite Wisdom it was thus ordained, and +why should we endeavour to be otherwise? When once we set up a standard +for ourselves, we have thrown aside our surest safeguard, and exposed +ourselves to censure and suspicion. When the ordinances of society do +not interfere with the higher principle of our lives they should be +obeyed, and in doing so we are following up the dictates of true +religion, by doing our duty as members of a community, as children of +one common father, which, if we stand selfishly apart, we cannot do. I +speak more of the opinion of the world," mamma then continued, "to you +than either to your sister or your cousin. Caroline I would rather check +in her perhaps too great regard for admiration; and Ellen is at present +too young, and in much too delicate health, to go out with me as much as +you will, even before you are what is termed introduced: besides which, +her natural reserve and timidity banish all fears on that account for +her. But for you, Emmeline, I do sometimes feel fearful that, in the +indulgence of uncontrolled feeling, you will forget you are not quite +such an independent being as you were at Oakwood. Many of your ideas are +quite contrary to those generally entertained by several with whom you +may associate; and I sometimes dread that by their unchecked expression, +or the avowed determination never to think as your companions do--that +you hate such confined ideas, or some such thing, which," and she +smiled, "if I know my Emmeline rightly, is not at all unlikely--you may +be exposing yourself to suspicion and dislike. I feel quite sure you +never will wilfully offend, or that you will really deserve such +censure; all I wish is that you will be a little more guarded and +controlled in your intercourse with strangers here, than you ever were +in the happy halls of Oakwood." + +I did not answer, my dear Mary; for I do not know why, but there was +something in her words that caused my eyes to fill with tears. I think +it was because it seemed such a painful task to maintain such a +continued control over my words and feelings, and mamma as usual divined +the cause of my sadness, even before I could define it myself. + +"Do not look so very sad, my sweet girl," she said so fondly, that like +a simpleton I cried the more. "I do not wish to see you changed, however +different you may be to others. I do not wish to chill one feeling in +this affectionate little heart, nor check one burst of enthusiasm. Your +character has been and is too great a source of unalloyed pleasure to +your mother, my Emmeline; it would be misery indeed to see it in any way +changed, though I do preach control so very much," she continued, more +playfully, but with that same fond affection which, while it made me +cry, appeared to soothe every painful emotion. "We shall not always be +in society, Emmeline; come to me as of old, and tell me every thought +and feeling, and all that has given you pain or pleasure. With me, +dearest, there must be no control, no reserve; if there be the least +appearance of either, you will inflict more pain on my heart than from +your infancy you have ever done, for I shall think my own counsels have +alienated from me the confidence of my child." + +I never shall forget the impressive sadness with which she spoke these +words, dearest Mary, and clinging to her, I declared and with truth, as +long as I might speak and think and feel without control when with her, +I would be all, all she wished in society--that I never could be +unhappy,--and to be reserved with her, I felt sure I never, never could. +She embraced me with the utmost tenderness, and banished all my +remaining sadness by the earnest assurance that she believed me. + +What a long letter have I written to you, my dearest friend; will you +not say I have atoned for my long silence? If I have not atoned to you, +I have at least gratified myself; for you know not how very often I +longed, after such conversations as I have recounted, to sit down and +write them all to you, as I had promised, when I could no longer tell in +speech all my kind mother's instructions. + +I do not make any apology for writing so much of her and myself, for I +know to you it is unnecessary. I tried to write all she said, that you +may benefit by it likewise, and in doing so I assure you I give you the +sincerest proof of my affection; for to no one but my own Mary have I +thus related the precious conversations I had alone with mamma. I know +no one but you whom I deem worthy of them. How I wish in return you +could solve a riddle for me. Why do I _fear_ mamma so much, when I love +her so very dearly? When I do or even think anything that my conscience +tells me is wrong, or at least not right, I absolutely tremble when I +meet her eye, though she may know nothing for which to condemn me. I +have never heard her voice in anger, but its sorrowful tones are far +more terrible. I think sometimes, if I had been in Ellen's place +eighteen months ago, I should have been as ill from fear alone, as she +was from a variety of emotions, poor girl. Yet why should I feel thus? +Caroline does not even understand me when I speak of such an emotion. +She says she is always very sorry when she has displeased mamma; but +fear is to her unknown--we two certainly are complete opposites. I think +Ellen's character resembles mine much more than my sister's does. But +you will like to know how my time of probation is thus shortened. For I +should have kept my resolution and waited the six months, pain as it +was, but one day about a week ago, mamma chanced to enter our study at +the very instant that the poor man who so politely believed Mademoiselle +Emmeline was too ill to appreciate his lessons was praising me up to the +skies for my progress; that same day Signor Rozzi had informed mamma, +with all the enthusiasm of his nation, that he was delighted to teach a +young lady who took such pleasure in the study of poetry, and so capable +of appreciating the beauties of the Italian poets. "In truth, madam," he +said, "she should be a poet herself, and the Temple of the Muses graced +with her presence." There's for you, Mary! But jokes apart, I do love +Italian; it is, it must be the natural language of poetry; the +sentiments are so exquisitely lovely, the language, the words, as if +framed to receive them--music dwells in every line. Petrarch, Tasso, +Dante, all are open to me now, and I luxuriate even in the anticipation +of the last,--but how I am digressing. That night mamma followed me to +my room, as I retired to bed, and smiling, almost laughing, at the half +terror of my countenance expressed, for I fancied she had come to +reprove the wild spirits I had indulged in throughout the day, she said, +"Is not this little head half turned with the flattery it has received +to-day?" + +"No," I instantly replied. "It is only the approbation of one or two +that can put me in any danger of such a misfortune." + +"Indeed," she answered, again smiling; "I fancied it was the fine +speeches you had been hearing to-day that had excited such high spirits, +but I am glad it is not; otherwise, I might have hesitated to express +what I came here to do--my approbation of my Emmeline's conduct the last +few months." + +I felt my colour rising to my very temples, dear Mary, for I did not +expect this, but I endeavoured to conceal all I felt by seizing her +hand, and imploring her, in a serio-comic, semi-tragic tone, not to +praise me, for she and papa were the two whose praises would have the +effect on me she feared. + +"But you must endeavour to keep your head steady now," she continued, +"because papa sends a packet to Oakwood next week, and a long letter for +Mary from my Emmeline must accompany it; her patience, I think, must be +very nearly exhausted, and I know if you once begin to write, a frank +will not contain all you will have to say, will it?" she added, with an +arch but such a dear smile. + +All my high spirits seemed for the moment to desert me, and I could not +answer her, except to cover her hand with kisses. I have told you what +she said in the way of reproof and advice, my dear Mary, but I cannot +coolly write all she said as encouragement and praise; it was much more +than I deserved, and all, therefore, that I can do, is to continue my +endeavours to feel one day rather more to merit it. I have risen every +morning an hour earlier, that I might tell you all I wished without +encroaching on my allotted hours of study; for I hope you will not +imagine I have written all this in one or two, or even three sittings; +and now do I not deserve a letter almost as long from you? If you do not +thus reward me, dread my vengeance, and write soon, for I long to have a +letter from you; of you I have heard often--but of and from, though +they may be both brothers of the family of the prepositions, are very +different in meaning. I have not written one word of Caroline or Ellen. +Am I not incurably egotistical? The former declares she is sure you will +have no time to read a letter from her, with such a volume as mine, and +Ellen says she has no time by this opportunity. I told her she ought to +get up as I did, she blushed, looked confused enough to awaken my +attention, and then said she supposed she was too lazy; and now I really +must say farewell. Mind you write all concerning yourself and your dear +mother, to whom present my very loving respects, and as for yourself, +dear Mary, let this long letter prove the sincere affection and perfect +confidence of your giddy friend, + +EMMELINE. + +P.S.--No young lady can write without a post-script. Mamma has +absolutely had the patience to read through my letter, and except that +she said so much of her was certainly needless, she approves of it +almost as much as she disapproved of my other, which she has just +compelled me to read. What a tissue of absurdity it contained,--worse, +it is sinful. I have had the pleasure of burning it, and I hope and +trust all my silly repinings are burnt with it. Once more, adieu. + +E.H. + + +_From Mrs. Hamilton to Miss Greville._ + +I cannot, my dear Mary, suffer Emmeline's long letter to be forwarded to +you without a few lines from me, to remove all lingering fears which you +may perhaps have had, that I do not approve of your correspondence. +Believe me, my dear girl, that to see you the chosen friend of my giddy +but warm-hearted Emmeline is still, as it has ever been from your +childhood, a source of real pleasure both to Mr. Hamilton and myself. +Female friendships are, I know, often regarded with contempt, not only +by men, but frequently by the sterner principles of our own sex; they +are deemed connections of folly; that the long letters which pass +between young ladies set down by the world as intimate friends, are but +relations of all the petty incidents they may hear or see. Such letters +are also considered tending to weaken the mind and produce false +sensibility, by the terms of affection they force into their +service--the magnified expression of momentary and fleeting emotions. +That such may sometimes be the tenor of some young people's +correspondence, I do not pretend to deny, and when that is the case, and +such letters are treasured up in secret and requested to be burnt, lest +any eyes save those for whom they are intended should chance to +encounter them, then, indeed, I too might disapprove of similar +intimacies, and it was to prevent this I would not permit Emmeline to +send the first letter to which she has alluded. Every feeling was +magnified and distorted, till you must have fancied--had not the real +cause been told--that some very serious evil had happened, or was +impending over her. I did not in the least doubt but that you would have +used all your influence to combat with and conquer this sinful repining; +but still I thought your very replies might have called forth renewed +ebullitions of sensibility, and thus in the frame of mind which she was +then indulging, your hinted reproaches, however gentle, might have been +turned and twisted into a decay of friendship or some such display of +sensitiveness, which would certainly have removed your affection and +injured herself. When, therefore, she so frankly acknowledged her error, +and offered to sacrifice the pleasure I knew it was to write to you, I +accepted it, spite of the pain which I saw she felt, and which to +inflict on her, you may believe gave her, and now I certainly feel +rewarded for all the self-denial we both practised, Emmeline is again +the same happy girl she was at Oakwood, although I can perceive there is +nothing, or at best but very little here, that can compensate for the +rural pleasures she has left. I do not wonder at this, for in such +feelings I trace those which, from my girlhood, were my own. I hope, +therefore, my dear young friend, that nothing in future will check your +intercourse with Emmeline, but that your correspondence may long +continue a source of pleasure to both of you. I love to see the perfect +confidence with which Emmeline has written, it proves she regards you as +you deserve to be regarded, as indeed her friend, not her companion in +frivolity and sentiment; and believe me, you may thus have it in your +power to improve and strengthen her perhaps rather too yielding +character. The manner in which, through the mercy of our compassionate +God, you have been enabled, young as you are, to bear your trials, which +are indeed severe, has inspired her with a respect for your character, +which the trifling difference in your ages might otherwise have +prevented, and therefore your letters will be received with more than +ordinary interest, and your good example, my dear girl, may do much +towards teaching her to bear those evils of life from which we cannot +expect her to be exempt, with the same patient resignation that +characterises you. Write to her therefore, as often as you feel +inclined, and do not, I beg, suppress the thoughts her candid letter may +have produced. I will not ask you to read her confession charitably, for +I know you will, and I assure you she has completely redeemed her fault. +The struggle was a very severe one to subdue the depression she had +encouraged so long; but she has nobly conquered, and I do not fear such +feelings of discontent ever again obtaining too great an ascendency. + +Tell your dear mother, with my affectionate love, that she will be +pleased to hear Ellen's health is improving, and has not as yet suffered +in the least from the winter or the more confined air of London, which I +almost dreaded might be baneful to one so delicate as she was when we +left Oakwood. I think our little tour did her much good, though the idea +of the exertion at first appeared painful. She is ever cheerful, though +I sometimes wish she would be more lively, and cannot help fancying, +notwithstanding her melancholy as a child was remarkable, that her +sufferings, both bodily and mental, the last eighteen months have made +her the very pensive character she is. I had hoped before that +unfortunate affair she was becoming as animated and light-hearted as my +Emmeline, but as that cannot be, I endeavoured to be thankful for the +health and quiet, and, I trust, happiness she now enjoys. We receive, +every opportunity, from Edward very satisfactory and pleasing letters, +which, as you will believe, tend not a little to lessen the anxiety of +both his sister and myself. His new captain is a far sterner character +and even more rigid in discipline than was Sir Edward Manly; but our +young sailor writes that this is rather a source of pleasure to him, for +it will be the greater merit to win his regard, which he has resolved to +use every endeavour to maintain. + +I must not forget, in thus writing of my family, to mention that Herbert +never writes home without inquiring after his favourite Mary, and if his +sisters do not answer such queries very particularly, they are sure in +the next letter to obtain as severe a reproach as can flow from his pen. +Will you not return such little tokens of remembrance, my dear girl? +Herbert has only lately changed the term by which in his boyhood he has +so often spoken of you--his sister Mary; and surely friends in such +early childhood may continue so in youth. The season has not, and will +not yet commence here. Caroline is anticipating it with a delight which +I could wish less violent. I certainly never observed the very striking +contrast between my daughters as I do now, though I always knew they +were very unlike. You, dear Mary, would, I think, even more than +Emmeline, shrink from the life which for a few months in every year we +must now lead, if we would do our duty in the station we are ordained to +fill. I think one season will prove to Caroline that it is not in gaiety +she will find true and perfect happiness, and if it do so, I shall join +in society next year with a less trembling heart. And now, adieu, my +dear young friend. If by Emmeline's long silence you have ever permitted +yourself to entertain a suspicion that I did not approve of your +correspondence, let this letter from me prove your error, and remember, +if ever sorrows in your young yet chequered life should assail you, and +you would conceal them from your revered parent, fearing to increase +her griefs, write to me without hesitation, without fear, and I will +answer you to the best of my ability; for sympathy, believe me, you will +never appeal to me in vain, and if you require advice, I will give it +you with all the affection I feel towards you. God bless you, my dear +girl. + +Yours, most affectionately, E. HAMILTON. + + +_From Emmeline Hamilton to Mary Greville._ + +A month, actually a whole month has elapsed, dearest Mary, since I wrote +to you last, and not a line from you. Granting it was nearly a week on +the way, three weeks are surely long enough for you to have written an +answer, when I entreated you to write so soon. What can be the cause of +this silence? I will not upbraid you, because I tremble when I think +what may perhaps have occasioned it. Mamma has become almost as anxious +as myself, therefore, as soon as you can, pray write, if it be but one +line to say you are well and at peace, I do not, will not ask more. I +scarcely like to write on indifferent subjects in this letter, but yet +as you have given me nothing to answer, I must do so to fill up my +paper; for if what I dread be not the case, you will not thank me for an +epistle containing but a dozen lines. London is becoming rather more +agreeable, and the fogs have given place to fine weather. The Court +arrived from Brighton yesterday, and they say the town will now rapidly +fill. Caroline is all joy, because early next month Mr. Grahame's family +leave Brighton. They have a fine house in Piccadilly not very far from +us, and Caroline is anticipating great pleasure in the society of Annie. +I wonder what my sister can find to like so much in Miss Grahame; to me +this friendship has been and is quite incomprehensible. She does not +possess one quality that would attract me; what a fortunate thing it is +we do not all like the same sort of people. Congratulate me, my dear +friend, I am overcoming in a degree my dislike to the company of +strangers. Some of papa and mamma's select friends and their families +have been calling on us the last month, and we have lately had rather +more society in the evening; not anything like large parties, but nice +little conversaziones, and really the lords and ladies who compose them +are much more agreeable than my fancy pictured them. They are so +intelligent, and know so much of the world, and the anecdotes they +relate are so amusing, and some so full of good-natured wit, that in one +evening I become more advanced in my favourite study, that of character, +than I do in weeks spent in retirement. Caroline is very much admired, +and I sometimes look at her with surprise; for she certainly looks much +better, and makes herself more agreeable among strangers than she +_always_ does at home. Mamma would call that perhaps an unkind +reflection, but I do not mean it for such; some people are more +fascinating out than at home. I am contented to remain in the shade, and +only speak when I am spoken to, like a good little girl; that is to say, +I converse with those who are good-natured enough to converse with me, +and many agreeable evenings have I passed in that way. There is her +Grace the Duchess D----, a very delightful woman, with elegant manners, +and full of true kindness. I like the way she speaks to her daughters, +at least her two youngest--the rest are married--Lady Anne and Lady +Lucy; they appear very nice young women, agreeable companions, as yet +we have but little conversation in common, though they appear to get on +remarkably well with Caroline. The Countess Elmore, a _nouvelle mariée_, +but a delightful creature, so exquisitely lovely--such eyes, hair, +teeth; and yet these rare charms appear entirely forgotten, or displayed +only for the Earl her husband, who is worthy of it all. He has talked to +me so often, that his wife also takes a great deal of notice of me, and +when they are of our party I always pass an agreeable evening. The Earl +is well acquainted with our beautiful Devonshire, dearest Mary; he +admires country as I do, and he asked so much about it one night last +week, that I quite forgot all my intentions about control, and actually +talked and apostrophised the Dart as I would to one of my own brothers. +I forgot everybody else in the room, till I caught mamma's glance fixed +earnestly on me, and then, my dear friend, I did not feel over +comfortable, however, I was soon at ease again, for I saw it was only +_warning_, not _reproving_; and the next morning, when I sought her to +tell her all my delight of the preceding evening, she shared in it all, +and when I asked her, half fearfully, if her glance meant I was passing +the boundary she had laid down, she said, "Not with the Earl of Elmore, +my dear Emmeline; but had you been talking in the same animated strain +to the Marquis of Alford, who, I believe, took you into supper, I should +say you had." + +"But I did not with him," I exclaimed. + +"No, my love," she answered, laughing at the anxiety that was, I felt, +imprinted on my face. "But why are you so terrified at the bare +suggestion?" + +"Because," I said, and I felt I blushed, "he is a single man; and I +never can speak with the same freedom to unmarried as to married men." + +"And why not?" she asked, and fixed her most penetrating glance on my +face. + +I became more and more confused, dear Mary, for I felt even to my own +mother it would be difficult to express my feelings on that subject. I +managed, however, with some difficulty, to say that I had often heard +Annie say she hated assemblies where there were only married men, though +there might be some fun in endeavouring to excite the jealousy of their +wives; but it was nothing compared to the triumph of chaining young men +to her side, and by animated conversation and smiles make each believe +himself a special object of attraction, when, in reality, she cared +nothing for either. "Rather than do that," I exclaimed, starting from +the stool which I had occupied at mamma's feet, and with an energy I +could not restrain, "I would bury myself for ever in a desert, and never +look upon a face I loved; rather than play upon the feelings of my +fellow-creatures, I would--I know not what I would not endure. Mother," +I continued, "mother, if ever you see me for one instant forget myself, +and by word or sign approach the borders of what is termed coquetry, +promise me faithfully you will on the instant prevent farther +intercourse, you will not hesitate one moment to tell me of it; even +though in your eyes it may appear but earnest or animated conversation. +Mother, promise me this," I repeated, for I felt carried so far beyond +myself, that when I look back on that conversation, it is with +astonishment at my own temerity. "Annie has laughed at me when I +expressed my indignation; she says it is what every woman of fashion +does, and that I am ridiculous if I hope to be otherwise. Mother, you +will not laugh at me. Spare me, spare me from the remorse that will +ensue, if such ever be my conduct." + +"Fear not, my dear and noble child," she exclaimed (her voice I knew +expressed emotion), and she pressed me fondly to her heart; "I promise +all, all you wish. Retain these noble feelings, these virtuous fears, +and I shall never have occasion to do what you desire. Oh, that your +sister thought the same!" she added; and oh, Mary, I shall never forget +the tone of anxiety and almost distress with which those last words were +said. + +"She does, she will, she must," I said, vehemently, for I would have +given worlds to calm the anxiety I know she feels for Caroline, and I do +wish that on some points my sister thought as I do, not from vanity, my +dear Mary, believe me, but for her own happiness. I cannot describe each +member of our circle, dear Mary, in this letter, but you shall have them +by degrees. The Earl and Countess Elmore are my favourites. I was very +sorry mamma did not permit me to join a very small party at their house +last week; the Countess came herself to beg, but mamma's mandate had +gone forth long ago, and therefore I submitted I hope with a good grace, +but I doubt it. She wishes me only to join in society at home this year, +but next year I may go out with her as often as I please. Lord Henry +D'Este is one of the most amusing creatures I ever met with, he has +always some droll anecdote to relate that calls forth universal +merriment; but of single men, the Earl of St. Eval, eldest son of the +Marquis of Malvern, is the most agreeable. He is not particularly +handsome, but has an eloquent smile and persuading voice, very tall and +noble in his carriage. He has talked to me much of Oxford, where for +about six or seven months he was acquainted with my brothers, of whom he +spoke in such high terms, dear Mary, and quite regretted he could not +enjoy their society longer. He has since been on the Continent, and +relates so delightfully all he has remarked or seen among foreigners, +that it is evident he travelled really for pleasure and information, not +for fashion. He appears much attracted with Caroline. I am sure he +admires her very much, and I only wish she would be as pleased with him +as I am, but she always provokes me by saying he has not sufficient +_esprit_; nor is he quite handsome enough to please her; and yet she +never refuses his attentions or shrinks from his conversation, as, if I +disliked him (as when we are alone she appears to do), I know I should. +Do not tremble for my peace, dear Mary, as you read these flowing +descriptions. In society they are most agreeable, but as the partner of +my life, I have not yet seen one to whom, were the question asked, I +could with any hope of happiness give my hand. These scenes are well for +a time, but they are not those in which I would wish to pass my life. My +wishes are humbler, much humbler; but I do not yet understand them +sufficiently even to define them to myself. It is much the same with the +young ladies of rank with whom I now frequently associate; they are +agreeable companions, but not one, no, not one can supply your place, +dearest Mary. Not one can I love as I do you. We have no ideas in +common; amiable and good as in all probability they are, still, as my +intimate friends I could not regard them; and yet--strange contradiction +you will say--I wish Caroline could find one amongst them to supply the +place of Annie Grahame in her heart. Why am I so prejudiced against her, +you will ask. Mary, I am prejudiced, and I cannot help it. Something +tells me my sister will obtain no good from this intimacy, I never did +like her, and of late this feeling has increased. Ellen is pleased, too, +when her health permits her to join our agreeable little coteries. She +appears overcoming her very great reserve, but does not become more +lively. She looks always to me, as if she felt a stain yet lingers on +her character, and though mamma and papa treat her even more kindly than +they did before, if possible, still there are times when to me she +appears inwardly unhappy. Strangers would only pronounce her more +pensive than usual for her years; for her slight figure and very +delicate features, as well as retiring manner, make her appear even +younger than she is, but I sometimes fancy I read more. She is always +calm and gentle as she used to be, and I never can discover when +anything vexes her, except by her heightened colour, which is more +easily visible now than when her health was better. + +I am summoned away, dear Mary, to go with mamma to ride, and as this +leaves to night, I must not write more now; but I intend teasing you +with letters every week till you write to me, if you are not well, in +the sincere wish to arouse you and draw your thoughts from what may be +unpleasing subjects: and if you are idle, to spur you to your task. +Adieu, my dearest friend. + +Your ever affectionate EMMELINE. + + +_From Mary Greville to Emmeline Hamilton_. + +Greville Manor, March 13. + +How can I thank you sufficiently, my dearest Emmeline, for the +affectionate letters which I have received so regularly the last month. +I am still so weak that much writing is forbidden me, and therefore to +reply to them all as my affection dictates is impossible. But I know +your kind heart, my Emmeline; I know it will be satisfied, when I say +your letters have indeed cheered my couch of suffering; have indeed +succeeded not only in changing _my_ thoughts from the subject that +perhaps too much engrosses them, but sometimes even my poor mother's. +Your first long letter, dated January, you tell me you wrote to let me +know you as you are, that all your faults may be laid bare to my +inspection; and what is to be the consequence--that you are, as you said +you would be, lowered in my estimation? no, dear and candid girl, you +are not, and while you retain such ingenuousness of disposition, you +never can be. Wrong you certainly were to encourage such despondency, +when so very many blessings were around you; but when once you become +sensible of an error, it is already with you corrected. Mamma has, I +know, some weeks ago, written to Mrs. Hamilton, to tell her Greville +Manor is to be sold. We shall never return to it again; the haunts I so +dearly loved, the scenes in which I have spent so many happy hours, all +will pass into the hands of strangers,--it will be no longer our own; we +shall be no longer together, as for so many years we have been. In +changing my residence thus, I feel as if every tie I loved was torn +asunder. + + * * * * * + +I thought I could have written calmly on this subject, my Emmeline, but +I believed myself stronger, both in mind and body, than I am. I have +been very ill, and therefore let that be my excuse. Plead for me with +your mother, Emmeline; tell her she knows not how I struggle to conceal +every pang from the watchful eyes of that mother who has hung over my +couch, with an agony that has told me plainer than words I am indeed her +only joy on earth. My spirit has been so tortured the three months of my +stern father's residence at home, that I feel as if I would--oh! how +gladly--flee away and be at rest: but for her sake, I pray for life, for +strength; for her sake, I make no resistance to the advice of Mr. +Maitland, that for a year or two we should live in Italy or Switzerland, +though in leaving England I feel as if I left I know not what, but +somewhat more than the mere love for my native land. Why, why is my +health so weak? why does it ever suffer when my mind is unhappy? Oh, +Emmeline, you know not the fierce struggle it is not to murmur; to feel +that it is in mercy my Father in Heaven afflicts me thus. If I might but +retain my health, my mother should never suspect my sufferings, I would, +I know I would, hide them from every eye; but she reads them in my +failing frame and pallid features, when I would by every means in my +power prove to her that while she is spared to me, I cannot be wholly +unhappy. It was not illness of body that prevented my replying to your +first long letter; but papa and Alfred were both at home, and my nerves +were so frequently shaken, that I knew it would be impossible to write +and therefore did not attempt it, even at the risk of offending, or at +least giving pain to you. I begged mamma to write to Mrs. Hamilton, and +tell her all that had occurred, on the receipt of your second, dated +February; for I thought while explaining our silence it would relieve +herself, which I think it did. It is six weeks since then and I am only +now allowed to write, and have been already obliged to pause more than +once in my task; so forgive all incoherences, my dearest Emmeline. The +Manor is to be sold in June: for my sake, mamma ventured to implore my +father to dispose of another estate, which has lately become his, +instead of this, but he would not listen to her; and I implored her not +to harrow her feelings by vain supplications again. Alfred is to go to +Cambridge, and this increased expense, as it is for him, papa seems to +think nothing of, but to my poor mother it is only another subject of +uneasiness, not so much for our sakes as for his own. Temptations of +every kind will be around him; his own little income will never be +sufficient to enable him to lead that life which his inclination will +bid him seek. Misfortune on every side appears to darken the future; I +cannot look forward. Pray for me, my dearest friend, that I may be +enabled to trust so implicitly in the Most High that even now my faith +should not for a moment waver. Oh! Emmeline, spite of all his harshness, +his coldness, and evident dislike, my heart yearns to my father. Would +he but permit me, I would love and respect him as fondly as ever child +did a parent, and when, after beholding his cruelty to my mother, my +heart has sometimes almost involuntarily reproached him and risen in +rebellion against him, the remorse which instantly follows adds to that +heavy burden which bows me to the earth. We leave England in May, if I +am sufficiently strong. I do not think we shall visit London, but travel +leisurely along the coast to Dover. I wish I could see you once more, +for I know not if we shall ever meet again, dear Emmeline; but perhaps +it is better not, it would only heighten the pain of separation. I +should like much to have written to your kind good mother with this, but +I fear my strength will not permit, yet perhaps, if she have one +half-hour's leisure, she will write to me again; her letters indeed are +my comfort and support. I thank your brother Herbert for his many kind +and affectionate messages; tell him all you will of our plans, and tell +him--tell him--his sister Mary will never forget the brother of her +childhood--the kind, the sympathising companion of her youth. To Percy, +too, remember me; and say all your own affection would dictate to +Caroline and Ellen. I would have written to the latter, but my weakness +will I know prove my best excuse. Before I quite conclude, let me say +how pleased I am to think that, although you still regret Oakwood, you +can find some pleasures in your present life. The society you describe +must be agreeable. I could scarcely, however, refrain from smiling at +your simplicity, my dear Emmeline, in imagining that all who visited at +your father's house would be as delightful and estimable as those whom +your second letter so eloquently described. Why are we so constantly +commanded to be charitable in our intercourse one with another? Must it +not be because our Great Master knew that we all had failings, some more +than others? if all were as worthy and virtuous as some appear, there +would be no need to practise such a virtue; but it is in a mixed society +it is more frequently called into play. More, would we preserve our own +virtue and piety, we must be charitable. We must look on the weaknesses +of our fellow-creatures with mercy and kindness, or how can we demand it +for ourselves? I am no advocate for seclusion in general, though my own +feelings prefer a quiet life. I think a life of retirement is apt to +render us selfish, and too positive in the wisdom and purity of our own +notions, too prejudiced against the faults of our fellows. Society is a +mirror, where we can see human character reflected in a variety of +shades, and thereby, if our minds be so inclined, we may attain a better +knowledge of ourselves. If, before we condemned others, we looked into +our own hearts, we are likely to become more charitable and more humble +at the same moment, and our own conduct necessarily becomes more +guarded. But with your mother, my Emmeline, and your open +heart--unsophisticated as it may be--you will never go far wrong. Mamma +is looking anxiously at me, as if she feared I am exerting myself too +much. I feel my cheeks are painfully flushed, and therefore I will obey +her gentle hint. Farewell, my Emmeline; may you long be spared the +sorrows that have lately wrung the heart of your attached and constant +friend, + +MARY GREVILLE. + + +_From Mrs. Hamilton to Miss Greville_. + +London, March 20th. + +Your letter to Emmeline, my dear young friend, I have read with feelings +both of pain and pleasure, and willingly, most willingly, do I comply +with your request, that I would write to you, however briefly. Your +despondency is natural, and yet it is with delight I perceive through +its gloom those feelings of faith and duty, which your sense of religion +has made so peculiarly your own. I sympathise, believe me, from my +heart, in those trials which your very delicate health renders you so +little able to bear. I will not endeavour by words of consolation to +alleviate their severity, for I know it would be in vain. In your +earliest youth I endeavoured to impress upon your mind that we are not +commanded to check every natural feeling. We are but told to pour before +God our trouble, to lean on His mercy, to trust in His providence, to +restrain our lips from murmuring, and if we do so, though our tears may +fall, and our heart feel breaking, yet our prayers will be heard and +accepted on high. It is not with you, my poor girl, the weak indulgence +of sorrow that ever prostrates you on a couch of suffering, it is the +struggle of resignation and concealment that is too fierce for the +delicacy of your constitution; and do you not think that strife is +marked by Him, who, as a father, pitieth His children? Painful as it is +to you, my dear Mary, your sufferings may be in a degree a source of +mercy to your mother. Agonizing as it is to the heart of a parent, to +watch the fevered couch of a beloved child, yet had she not that +anxiety, the conduct of your father and brother might present still +deeper wretchedness. For your sake, she dismisses the harrowing thoughts +that would otherwise be her own; for your sake, she rallies her own +energies, which else might desert her; and when you are restored to her, +when, in those intervals of peace which are sometimes your own, she sees +you in health, and feels your constant devotion, believe me, there is a +well of comfort, of blessed comfort in her fond heart, of which nothing +can deprive her. For her sake, then, my dearest Mary, try to conquer +this reluctance to leave England. I do not reproach your grief, for I +know that it is natural. But endeavour to think that this residence for +a few years on the Continent, may restore your mother to a degree of +peace, which, in England, at present she cannot know; and will not this +thought, my love, reconcile you to a short separation from the land of +your birth, and the friends you so dearly love? We shall all think of +and love our Mary, however widely parted. We will write very frequently, +and every information I can obtain of your brother shall be faithfully +recorded. Mr. Hamilton has ever felt for your mother as a brother would, +and for her sake, her misguided son will be ever an object of his +dearest care. Do not fear for him, and endeavour to soothe your mother's +anxiety on that head also. Herbert has written to you, I enclose his +letter; and he entreats most earnestly that you will not only permit him +to continue to write, but answer him, during your residence abroad. He +has been deeply grieved at the intelligence we have reported of you, and +I hope and think, if your mother do not disapprove of your +correspondence, that the humble yet fervent faith which breathes in the +religion of my son may long prove a source of consolation as well as +interest to you, who, from your childhood, could sympathise with all his +exalted feelings. Poor Emmeline has shed many bitter tears over your +letter; she cannot bear to think of your leaving England, but yet agrees +with me in believing it will be a beneficial change for both yourself +and Mrs. Greville, but her letter shall speak her own feelings. I will +not write more now, but will very soon again. Do not exert yourself too +much to answer either Emmeline or myself; we will not wait for regular +replies. I have written to your mother also, therefore this brief +epistle is entirely for yourself, as you wished it. Mr. Hamilton will +meet you at Dover, which will afford me much satisfaction, as I shall +know more than I could ever learn by a letter, and he will, I trust, be +enabled to set your mother's heart at rest on some points which must be +now subjects of anxiety. God bless you, my Mary, and restore you +speedily to health and peace. + +Yours, with the warmest affection, + +E. HAMILTON. + + + + +CHAPTER II. + + +An early April sun was shining brightly through one of the windows of an +elegantly furnished boudoir of a distinguished-looking mansion, in the +vicinity of Piccadilly. There was somewhat in the aspect of the room, in +the variety of toys scattered on every side, in the selection of the +newest novels which were arranged on the table, and an indescribable air +which pervaded the whole, that might have aroused a suspicion, in any +keen observer who could discover character by trifles, that the lady to +whom that apartment belonged possessed not the very strongest or most +sensible mind. A taste which frivolous trifles could alone gratify +appeared evident; and the countenance of the lady, who was reclining +listlessly on the couch, would have confirmed these surmises. She did +not look above forty, if as much, but her features told a tale of +lassitude and weariness, at variance with the prime of life, which was +then her own. No intellect, no emotion was expressed on her countenance; +it never varied, except, perhaps, to denote peevishness or sullenness +when domestic affairs annoyed her, which appeared to be the case at +present. A volume of the last new novel was in her hand, in which she +appeared sufficiently interested as to feel still more annoyed at the +interruption she was constantly receiving from a young lady, who was +also an inmate of her room. + +Striking, indeed, was the contrast exhibited in the features of the +mother and daughter, for so nearly were they connected, and yet to some +the inanimate expression of the former would have been far preferable to +the handsome but scornful countenance of the latter. She could not have +been more than eighteen, but the expression of the features and the tone +of character were already decided to no ordinary degree. There was an +air of fashion in her every movement; an easy assurance and independence +of spirit which might have made her mother respected, but which in one +so young were intolerable to all save those whom she had contrived to +make her devoted admirers. Spite of the natural beauty of her face, +haughtiness, pride, and some of the baser passions of human nature, were +there visibly impressed; at least whenever she appeared in her natural +character, when no concealed designs caused her to veil these less +amiable emotions in eloquent smiles and a manner whose fascination was +felt and unresisted, even by those who perhaps had been before +prejudiced against her. Various were the characters she assumed in +society--assumed to suit her own purpose, made up of art; even at home +she sometimes found herself seeking for design, as if it were impossible +to go straightforward, to act without some reason. We shall find, +however, as we proceed, that she had one confidant at home, to whom, +when exhausted by the fatigue of planning, she would confess herself, +and who was generally the hearer and abettor of the young lady's +schemes. This was a person who had lived for many years in the family as +governess; although that office with the elder of her charges had ever +been but nominal, and with the younger it was neglected for the office +of friend and confidant, which Miss Malison very much preferred. + +It was evident this morning that the efforts of the young lady had not +succeeded quite so well as usual in veiling the discontent in which she +inwardly indulged. She was amusing herself at that moment in opening +every book on the table, glancing sulkily on their contents, and then +throwing them down again with a violence that not only had the effect of +making her mother start, but of disturbing the quiet repose of some of +the fragile toys in their vicinity, to the manifest danger of their +destruction. + +"I wish you would oblige me, Annie, by endeavouring to amuse yourself in +a quieter manner," observed her mother, in a very languid tone. "You +have no pity on my poor nerves. You know when I have these nervous +headaches, the least thing disturbs me." + +"You may be certain, mamma, it is reading that makes them worse, not my +noise. You had much better put away the book, and then you have some +chance of being free from them." + +"Will you read to me then instead? I assure you I should much prefer +it." + +"_I_ read aloud! I could not do it to please the most agreeable person +in the world; and as you are so very obliging to me in refusing so +decidedly to go with me to-night, you cannot expect I should oblige +you." + +Lady Helen Grahame's placid countenance gave no evidence of inward +disturbance at this undutiful speech; she was too much used to it, to +feel the pain it might otherwise have produced, and too indifferent to +be either indignant or displeased. + +"You are very ungrateful, Annie," she replied, in that same languid +tone, but with the very little expression in her voice, no emotion was +visible. "I tell you I will send round to Lady Charlton or the Countess +St. Aubyn; either of them, I know, will be very happy to chaperon you. +Surely you can let me be quiet for one evening." + +"Lady Charlton I cannot bear; she is the most detestable creature I +know. I would rather be buried alive in the country, than join in London +society under her care; with her long speeches of prudery and virtue, +and the modest reserve of young ladies, and a hundred other such +saint-like terms, when all the time she is doing all she can to catch +husbands for her three great gawky daughters, who in mamma's presence +are all simplicity and simper--sweet girls just introduced; when I am +very much mistaken if the youngest is not nearer thirty than twenty. And +as for Lady St. Aubyn, you know very well, mamma, papa declared I should +never go out with her again; it is just the same as if I were alone. She +has not a word or thought for any one but herself: she thinks she may +act with as much coquetry now as before she married. I do believe that +woman only married that she might be more at liberty and go out by +herself." + +"Then, if you like neither of them, write a note to Mrs. Hamilton. Your +father would be better pleased if you were to go under her care, than of +any other." + +"Mrs. Hamilton! I would not for worlds. Every pleasure I might +otherwise enjoy would vanish before the stern majesty of her presence. I +wonder how Caroline can bear the thraldom in which her mother holds +her--it is complete slavery." + +"I will not hear a word against Mrs. Hamilton," exclaimed Lady Helen, +with more display of feeling than had yet been perceivable. "She is a +truer friend both to your father and myself than any of those with whom +we associate here." + +"It is well you think so, my lady mother," replied Miss Grahame, in a +peculiar tone. "It is fortunate you are not troubled with jealousy, and +that this paragon of perfection, this Mrs. Hamilton, is your friend as +well as papa's. If I heard my husband so constantly extolling another +woman in my presence, I should not be quite so easy." + +If a flush rose to Lady Helen's pale cheek at these words, it was so +faint as scarcely to be perceivable, and she took no notice, except to +say-- + +"If your great desire to go to this ball is to be with Caroline the +first night of her _entrée_, I should think Mrs. Hamilton was the best +chaperon you could have." + +"I tell you, mother, I will not go with her. She has not bewitched me as +she has you and papa. If you would only be quiet for a few hours, I am +sure your head would be sufficiently well for you to go with me; and you +know I never do enjoy an evening so much as when you accompany me, dear +mamma," she continued, softening the violence with which she had at +first spoken into one of the most persuasive eloquence; and humbling her +pride and controlling the contempt with which she ever looked on her +weak but far more principled mother, she knelt on a low stool by her +side, and caressingly kissed Lady Helen's hand. + +"Dear mamma, you would oblige me, I am sure you would, if you knew how +much your presence contributes to my enjoyment. A ball is quite a +different thing when I feel I am under your wing, and you know papa +prefers my going out with you to any one else." + +Annie spoke truth, though her words appeared but flattery. The extreme +indolence of Lady Helen's natural disposition, which was now heightened +by the lassitude attendant on really failing health, rendered her merely +a chaperon in name. Annie felt very much more at liberty when with her +than with any other; she could act as she pleased, select her own +companions, coquette, talk, dance, without ever thinking of her mother +or being sought for by her, till the end of the evening. It was enough +she was with Lady Helen, to silence all gossiping tongues and to satisfy +her father, who, one of the most devoted members of the Lower House, +scarcely ever visited such places of amusement, and therefore knew not +the conduct of either his wife or daughter. He long since discovered his +authority was as nothing to his children; he felt most painfully his +sternness had alienated their affections, and he now rather shrunk from +their society; therefore, even at home he was a solitary man, and yet +Grahame was formed for all the best emotions, the warmest affections of +our nature. He was ignorant that his wife now very frequently suffered +from ill-health, for he had never seen her conduct different even when +in youth and perfectly well. Had he known this, and also the fact that, +though trembling at his sternness, she yet longed to receive some token +of his affection--that she really loved him, spite of the many faults +and the extreme weakness of her character, he might have been happy. + +Deceived by her daughter's manner, Lady Helen began to waver in the +positive refusal she had given to accompanying her, and Annie was not +slow in discovering her advantage; she continued the persuasions she +knew so well how to use, concealing the inward struggle it was to veil +her discontent at this unwonted humiliation, and suppressing the +violence that was ready to break forth, at length succeeded. Though +really feeling too languid for the exertion, the wavering mother could +not resist the unusually gentle manner of the persevering daughter, and +Miss Grahame flew to her confidant to impart the joyful tidings. + +Miss Malison was employed in endeavouring, by commands, exhortations, +and threats, to compel her pupil to practise a difficult sonata, which +her music-master had desired might be prepared by the time of his next +visit. Now it happened that Lilla Grahame had not the slightest taste +for music, and that Miss Malison did not possess the patient +perseverance requisite to smooth the difficulty of the task, nor the +gentleness necessary to render it more pleasing to her pupil; therefore, +in these practising lessons discord ever prevailed over harmony, and the +teacher was ever ready to seize the most trifling excuse to neglect her +office, and leave Lilla to practise or not as she pleased. + +"Malison, _chère_ Malison," exclaimed Annie, in a tone of glee, as she +entered, "do leave that stupid girl and come with me; I have some +charming intelligence to communicate. And it really is no use boring +yourself with Lilla; she will never play, try as hard as she can." + +"According to you, I shall do nothing," burst angrily from her sister's +lips, for her temper, naturally good, though somewhat hasty, had been +completely ruined by careless and mistaken treatment. "If I had been +properly taught, I should have done as others do: if Miss Malison had +chosen to take the same pains with me as Miss Harcourt does with +Emmeline and Ellen, I should have been a very different girl." + +"Insolent, ungrateful girl! do you dare to say I have neglected my +duty?" exclaimed the _gouvernante_, enraged beyond bounds at this +display of insubordination in one whose spirit she had left no means +untried to bend to her will, and forgetting herself in the passion of +the moment, enforced her words by what is termed a sound box on the ear. + +"Now go and tell mamma, pretty dear; or papa, if you like it better," +Miss Grahame said, in a whining tone. + +But Lilla answered her not. A crimson flush for the moment spread over +her very temples at the infliction of this indignity, which very quickly +gave way to a deadly, almost livid paleness, on which the marks of Miss +Malison's ready fingers were the only spots of red. Without a word in +reply, she hastily rose from the piano and left the room. + +"Will she _blab_?" was the elegant question that was asked as the door +closed. + +"Not she," replied Annie, laughing. "She dare not tell papa, and she +knows it is of no use appealing to mamma, who implicitly believes all +you tell her of Miss Lilla's excessive obstinacy, idleness, and +passionate temper in which she so constantly indulges; your deep regrets +that either of Lady Helen Grahame's daughters should be such a character +have succeeded so admirably. I have had such a struggle to obtain +mamma's promise to go with me to-night, that I really feel exhausted," +and the young lady threw herself in a most graceful attitude of +listlessness on a sofa that stood invitingly beside lier. + +"But have you succeeded?" + +"Admirably! at length mamma thinks I am most amiable. My persuasions +were so eloquent, that the most obdurate person could not have resisted +them. I tried violence and sulkiness at first, thinking to frighten or +worry her into compliance; but finding both fail, I was compelled to +have recourse to humiliation and persuasion. If it had continued much +longer, I should have choked by the way; it is quite a relief to breathe +freely again. What do you think of her wishing me to go under the care +of Mrs. Hamilton to-night? I really could hardly control my horror at +the idea." + +"Horrible, indeed! What would have become of all your plans, if you +had?" + +"My dear creature, I would not have gone with her for worlds; but, +however, I think my plans are in too good training for one night spent +under her eyes to injure them. Caroline is beginning, I think, to feel +somewhat like a slave under this keen _surveillance_ of her paragon +mother, and to pine for the freedom of thought and act which I so +unboundedly enjoy. She only wants a little of my good advice and better +example, to become really a girl of spirit." + +"But take care the spirit you are calling forth does not turn against +you," observed Miss Malison. + +"Not at all likely, _ma chère_. I am careful only to excite it to serve +my own purposes. She likes me, I believe, and I can make her what I +please. Let her confidence in her mother be once destroyed, you will see +if she does not act as foolishly as I can desire. She has been buried in +the country so long, she is a mere infant with regard to all that +concerns a life of fashion; and, therefore, will be gladly led by one +she considers so completely _au fait_ at its mysteries as myself. I used +to like her in the country, because she always listened so eagerly to +all I said about London. I saw she envied me even when we were children, +and therefore fancied myself a most important personage." + +"And do you like her now?" + +"You are laughing at me, _chère_ Malison. You know I cannot bear a +rival, and this girl's dazzling beauty will completely cast me in the +shade." + +"You don't mean to say her beauty can be compared to yours?" interrupted +Miss Malison. + +"Perhaps not in the sterling worth of the two," replied Annie, glancing +complacently on a large mirror; "but she is new, Malison--quite new. Her +mother only kept her so long away that she might shine with greater +brilliancy when introduced. As for Caroline, I like her, as far as she +assists my plans, and by her silly, or, if that would serve me better, +criminal conduct, takes somewhat away from her mother's perfection, and +by the pain Mrs. Hamilton will feel, gratify my overpowering +detestation. Malison, you look delighted. Your assistance I am sure of, +if I require it; for you dislike this paragon of her sex almost as much +as I do." + +"Indeed I do. I have never forgotten nor forgiven her presumption a year +or two ago, in hinting so broadly I was mistaken in my treatment of +Lilla, and that gentleness would have much better effect; gentleness +indeed, with a girl that would tire the patience of a saint. She is +always worse after having been with this Mrs. Hamilton, and I suppose it +will be all over again now. I wish, with your charming plans, my dear +Miss Grahame, you would find one to prevent all intercourse between the +Hamiltons and your sister." + +"At present, _ma chère_, such a thing is out of my power, but we will +not despair; although the more you would say about Miss Lilla being +undeserving of such indulgence, the more papa would answer, let her go +and she will learn to be better there. I heard him give mamma peremptory +orders the other day, when we prevented her going, never to refuse +whenever Mrs. Hamilton invited her. Severity is a most admirable method, +my good Malison; you will break her spirit if you persevere, +notwithstanding all the amiable Mrs. Hamilton may do or say." + +"I wish I may; but you have not told me all yet. How proceed your +schemes with Lord Alphingham?" + +"To perfection! I have given Caroline a distaste for every other kind of +person. She has met him, you know, once or twice here, and that was +sufficient to fascinate her. She thinks him the handsomest and most +delightful man she ever knew. It is enough for Mr. Hamilton to see him a +friend of papa's to be attracted towards him; in all probability he will +be introduced at his house, and then my scheme will be still easier. It +will not be difficult to talk Caroline into fancying herself desperately +in love with him, and he with her--he is already attracted; and when I +see the aspect of affairs favourable, I will just get some kind friend +to whisper into Mrs. Hamilton's ear some of the pretty tales I have +heard of this Viscount, and you will see what will follow. These _on +dits_ are, fortunately for my plans, only known among my coterie. With +us, they only render Lord Alphingham more interesting; but with Mrs. +Hamilton they would have the effect of banishing him for ever from her +presence and from the notice of her daughter; the catastrophe, my dear +creature, shall be the perfection of diplomacy, but of that hereafter. I +owe Lord Alphingham a spite, which I will pay off one day, for his +desertion of me the moment Caroline appeared. I may do all I wish with, +one word. All my present intention is, by a gradual yet sure process, to +undermine Caroline's confidence in her mother, and make me her confidant +instead, and if I do that, the rest is easy." + +"You know you have never failed in any scheme, therefore you may feel +secure in this," replied Miss Malison, with ready flattery; for she knew +Miss Grahame's love of designing, and really felt gratified at any plan +tending to injure Mrs. Hamilton, whom she detested with all the +malevolence of a mean and grovelling mind, which despised the virtue +that was too exalted for its comprehension. + +Some little time longer this amiable pair conversed, but their further +conversation it is needless to record. We have already seen that +Emmeline Hamilton's prejudice against Annie Grahame was not unfounded, +and that at present is enough. Before, however, we quit Lady Helen's +mansion, we may say a few words on the character of Lilla, in whom, it +may be recollected, Mrs. Hamilton had ever felt interest sufficient to +indulge a hope that she might render her one day a greater comfort to +her father than either of his other children. As a child, her temper was +naturally good, though somewhat hasty and self-willed; high-spirited, +but affectionate to a degree that would have made the task of training +and instruction easy to any one who possessed sufficient gentleness to +win her affection, and with patience, yet firmness, to guide her in the +right way. Unfortunately, Miss Malison possessed neither; extremely +passionate herself, where her interests did not interfere to control it, +she was not at all the person to guide a passionate child. Severity was +her weapon, and every means used to break the spirit, which she could +plainly perceive would soon endeavour to throw off her control. Lilla +revolted at this treatment, and many evil qualities were thus introduced +in her disposition, which, when they fell under her eye, Mrs. Hamilton +was convinced were completely the fruits of mistaken management. From +being merely hasty, her passionate anger and hatred of her governess had +now increased to such height, as to be really alarming not only to her +weak-minded mother, but to Mrs. Hamilton, who, however, was certainly +never aware of their extent; for before her Lilla was generally gentle +and controlled. Something always occurred to call forth these bursts of +passion in Lady Helen's presence, and consequently, the actual conduct +of Lilla confirmed the statement of Miss Malison, as to her violence and +other evil qualities. Mr. Grahame, too, was compelled to believe all +that was told him, and his sternness towards his unhappy child +frequently caused her to fly from his presence in dread; although her +warm heart yearned towards him with such deep affection, which could he +have guessed one-half of its extent, would have twined her fondly round +his heart, and forced him to examine more strictly than he did the +conduct of Miss Malison. Lilla's dislike to her more favoured sister was +almost as violent as that she bore to her governess; and the conviction +that all her mother's family looked on her as a passionate, evil-minded +girl, of course, increased every bitter feeling. Often, very often, did +Mrs. Hamilton long to implore Mr. Grahame to dismiss Miss Malison, and +place Lilla under the care of some lady more fitted for the task; but +she felt that such advice might be looked upon with some justice by Lady +Helen's friends as most unwarrantable interference. Miss Malison had +been most highly recommended to Lady Helen by her mother, the Duchess of +----, and as, in the opinion of that branch of the family, Annie +abundantly displayed the good effects of her management, it was very +naturally supposed that Lilla's opposite character proceeded from an +innate evil disposition, and not from any fault in her governess. She +was now nearly fourteen and each year Mrs. Hamilton's hopes for the +future worth of her character became fainter; yet still she determined +to do all in her power to counteract Miss Malison's plans, and subdue +Lilla's fearful passions, and those longings for revenge, not only on +her governess but her sister, which, by many little things, she could +perceive were lurking round her heart. Montrose Grahame had been, as we +already know, from his earliest youth the intimate friend of Mr. +Hamilton, and, notwithstanding the increasing cares of their respective +families, this friendship had continued and, if possible, increased, and +Mrs. Hamilton sharing the sentiments of her husband, the qualities of +Grahame speedily caused him to become her friend likewise. She had ever +seen with regret his sternness to his children, she saw also that he was +pained, deeply pained, as their characters became more matured; and, +spite of the difficulties of the task, her benevolent mind determined to +leave no means untried to make one child at least his comfort. Lilla's +affection for her was as violent as her other feelings, and on that she +resolved at first to work. It was strange too, how devotedly attached +this wild and headstrong girl became, to one, who of all others appeared +least suited to her, and that one the mild and pensive Ellen. It +appeared as if it were a relief to meet one so widely different to +herself, and therefore she loved her. The high spirits and animation of +Emmeline appeared less congenial to her affections than the gentle +sweetness of Ellen. Caroline was Annie's friend, and that was enough for +her; not even her being Mrs. Hamilton's daughter could make her an +object of interest. On the day we have mentioned, Lilla had sat for +above an hour in her room; indignation at the insult she had received +swelling in every vein, and longing with sickening intensity for some +means to free herself from such galling thraldom. She did not give vent +to her injured feelings in tears, but her countenance so clearly +expressed the emotions of her heart, that it actually startled a servant +who entered with a message--a request from Mrs. Hamilton, that her young +friend would spend that evening with her daughter and niece. Lilla +started up with a wild exclamation of delight, and the anticipation of +the evening hours enabled her to obey with haughty calmness the summons +of Miss Malison. Before, however, she departed on her visit, a fresh +ebullition had taken place between the sisters in the presence of their +mother, to the great terror of Lady Helen, whose irritation at Lilla's +violence increased, as she could perceive nothing in Annie's words or +manner to call for it. Had she been less indolent, she might easily have +discovered that her elder daughter never permitted a single opportunity +to escape without eliciting Lilla's irritability. As it was, she coldly +rejected the offered caresses the really affectionate girl would have +lavished on her, as she wished her good night, and therefore it was with +a heart bursting with many mingled emotions she sought the happy home of +her beloved friends. + +There gladly will we follow her, for the scenes of violence and evil +passion we have slightly touched on are not subjects on which we love to +linger. + + + + +CHAPTER III. + + +There was thought, deep thought, engraved on Mrs. Hamilton's expressive +countenance, as she sat beside a small table, her head leaning on her +hand, anxious, perhaps even painful, visions occupying her reflective +mind. The evening was gradually darkening into twilight, but still she +did not move, nor was it till a well-known tap sounded at the door, and +her husband stood before her, that she looked up. + +"Will you not let your husband share these anxious thoughts, my +Emmeline?" he said, as he gazed earnestly on her face. + +"My husband may perhaps think them silly and unfounded fancies," she +replied, with a faint smile. + +"He is so prone to do so," answered Mr. Hamilton, in an accent of +playful reproach; "but if you will not tell me, I must guess them--you +are thinking of our Caroline?" + +"Arthur, I am," she said, with almost startling earnestness; "oh, you +cannot tell how anxiously! I know not whether I am right to expose her +to the temptations of the world; I know her disposition, I see the evils +that may accrue from it, and yet, even as if I thought not of their +existence, I expose her to them. Oh, my husband, can this be right? can +I be doing a parent's duty?" + +"We should not, my beloved, be fulfilling the duties of our station, did +we not sometimes mingle in society: all our duty is not comprised in +domestic life. It is when we retain our integrity unsullied, our +restraining principles unchanged in the midst of temptations, that we +show forth, even to the thoughtless, the spirit that actuates us, and by +example may do good. Besides, remember, dearest, we are not about to +enter into continued and incessant dissipation, which occupies the +existence of so many; we have drawn a line, and Caroline loves her +parents too well to expect or wish to pass its boundary. Remember, too, +the anxious fears which were yours when Percy was about to enter into +scenes of even stronger temptation than those which will surround his +sister; and have they had foundation? Has not the influence of his +mother followed him there, and restrained him even at the moment of +trial, and will not the influence of that mother do the same for +Caroline?" + +"Percy is, indeed, all my heart could wish," replied Mrs. Hamilton, +still somewhat sadly; "but his disposition is different to that of +Caroline's. I know his confidence in me is such, and his affection so +strong, that for my sake he would do more than those who but slightly +know him would imagine. When a son really loves his mother, it is a +different, perhaps a more fervid, feeling than that ever known by a +daughter. He feels bound to protect, to cherish, and that very knowledge +of power heightens his affections." + +"You do not doubt your daughters' love, my Emmeline? must I accuse you +of injustice too?" + +"No, dearest Arthur, I do not doubt their love; for my Emmeline I do not +tremble. Her confidence I shall never lose; her affections, however I +may be called upon to exert my authority, will never waver, and +completely opposite as are the feelings with which she and Percy regard +me, their love may be equally intense. But forgive me, my dear husband, +I may be unjust, and if I am may my child forgive me; I am not--oh, that +I were--equally confident in my Caroline. She loves me, but that +affection, I know, does not prevent her thinking me harsh and unkind, if +my wishes interfere with hers. My authority is not the same with her as +it is to her sister and cousin. She seeks another confidential friend +besides her mother, for she dreads my opinions differing from hers. I +have marked her thus in early childhood, and it still exists, though her +temper is more controlled, her disposition, more improved. The last few +years she has been thrown almost entirely with me, and not much above a +twelvemonth since she shrunk from the idea of confiding in any one as +she did in me." + +"And while that confidence exists, my Emmeline, you surely have no +right to fear." + +"But it is waning, Arthur. The last month I know, I feel it is +decreasing. She is no longer the same open-hearted girl with me as she +was so lately at Oakwood. She is withdrawing her confidence from her +mother, to bestow it on one whom I feel assured is unworthy of it." + +"Nay, Emmeline, your anxiety must be blinding you; you are too anxious." + +His wife answered him not in words, but she raised her expressive eyes +to his face, and he saw they were filled with tears. + +"Nay, nay, my beloved!" he exclaimed, as he folded her to his bosom, +struck with sudden self-reproach. "Have my unkind words called forth +these tears? forgive me, my best love; I think I love my children, but I +know not half the depths of a mother's tenderness, my Emmeline, nor that +clear-sightedness which calls for disquietude so much sooner in her +gentle heart than in a father's. But can we in no way prevent the growth +of that intimacy of which I know you disapprove?" + +"No, my dearest Arthur, it must now take its course. Pain as it is to +me, I will not rudely check my child's affections, _that_ will not bring +them back to me. She may, one day, discover her error, and will then +gladly return to that love, that tenderness, of which she now thinks but +lightly. I must endeavour to wait till that day comes, with all the +patience I can teach my heart to feel," she added, with a smile. +"Perhaps I am demanding more than is my due. It is not often we find +young girls willing to be contented with their mother only as a friend; +they pine for novelty, for companions of their own age, whom they +imagine can sympathise better in their feelings. A child is all in all +to a mother, though a parent is but one link in the life of a child; yet +my children have so long looked on me as a friend, that, perhaps, I feel +this loss of confidence the more painfully." + +"But you will regain it, my Emmeline; our Caroline is only dazzled now, +she will soon discover the hollowness of Annie's professions of +everlasting friendship." + +Mrs. Hamilton shook her head. + +"I doubt it, my dear husband. The flattering warmth with which Annie +first met Caroline has disappointed me. I thought and hoped that here, +surrounded by all her fashionable acquaintances, she would rather have +neglected her former friends, and Caroline's pride taking umbrage, their +intimacy would have been at once dissolved. Instead of this, Annie never +fails to treat her with the most marked distinction, evidently appearing +to prefer her much above her other friends; and, therefore, as in this +instance Caroline has found my warnings and suspicions needless and +unjust, she is not likely to permit my opinion of Annie to gain much +ascendancy." + +"But deceived as we have been in this instance, my dear Emmeline, may we +not be so in other points of Annie's character? She is evidently devoted +to fashion and fashionable pleasures, but still there may be some good +qualities lurking round her heart, which her intimacy with Caroline may +bring forward." + +"I hope it may be so," replied Mrs. Hamilton, fervently, though somewhat +doubtingly. "For her father's sake, as well as that of my child's, I +wish her disposition may be different to that which I, perhaps +uncharitably, believe it. You must give me a portion of your sanguine +and trusting hopes, my dearest Arthur," she continued, fondly laying her +hand in his. + +Mr. Hamilton returned a playful answer, and endeavoured to turn the +thoughts of his wife to other and more pleasurable subjects. Anxiety +such as hers could not be entirely dispelled, but it was lessened, for +she had imparted it to her husband, and his watchful care would combine +with her own to guard their child. + +Very different were Caroline's feelings on this important night. Mrs. +Hamilton's fears and Annie's hopes were both well founded. We have known +the character of Caroline from a child; and though the last three or +four years it had so improved, that at Oakwood, Mrs. Hamilton had +ventured to banish fear, and indulge in every pleasing hope, yet there +was a degree of pride still remaining, that revolted very frequently +from the counsels even of her mother; that high and independent spirit +sometimes in secret longed to throw off the very slight restraint in +which she felt held at home. She could not bear to feel that she was in +any way controlled; she longed for the exercise of power, and by the +display of that beauty, those qualities, she knew she possessed, force +herself to be acknowledged as a girl of far more consequence than she +appeared to be when in the quiet halls of Oakwood. There nothing ever +occurred to call these feelings forth, but they were only dormant, and +in London they obtained much greater sway. She felt more controlled than +ever by her mother. Secretly she pined to free herself from that which +she magnified into thraldom, but which was but the watchful tenderness +of a devoted parent; and when the representations, sympathy, and +persuasions of Annie were listened to, no wonder these feelings +increased. Cautiously Miss Grahame had worked: she continually spoke of +the freedom she enjoyed; she introduced her friend to some young ladies +who were continually speaking of the delights of independence both in +act and word. Once introduced, they said they were emancipated from the +labour of the schoolroom, they could employ themselves as they liked, go +out when they pleased, and their mothers never interfered with their +amusements, except to see that they were becomingly dressed, chaperon +them to balls, and second all their efforts at fascination. + +The restraint which, when compared with these, Caroline could not but +feel was hers at home, of course became more and more intolerable. In +confidence, she imparted to Annie her discontent. For the first time she +confided in another, feelings she shrunk from imparting to her mother, +and once such a confidential intimacy commenced, she neither could nor +would draw back. Annie artfully appeared to soothe, while in reality she +heightened the discontent and even indignation of her friend. Yes; +Caroline by slow degrees became even indignant at the conduct of that +mother whose every thought, whose most fervent prayer was for the +happiness of her children; and she looked to this night as the beginning +of a new era, when she allowed herself to hope, with the assistance of +Annie, she would gradually escape from control, and act as other girls +of spirit did. + +There was another subject on which, by the advice of Annie, Caroline +carefully refrained from speaking at home, and that was Lord Alphingham, +a handsome and elegant viscount, who it may be remembered had been +mentioned in Annie's conversation with Miss Malison; and yet it would +appear strange that such was Miss Grahame's counsel, when Mr. Hamilton +frequently spoke of the viscount with every mark of approbation due to +his public conduct; of his private little was known, and still less +inquired. He was famous in the Upper House--an animated and eloquent +speaker--seconding and aiding with powerful influence all Grahame's +endeavours in the Lower House, and rendering himself to the latter a +most able and influential friend. His brilliant qualities, both as a +member of parliament and of polite society, rendered him universally +courted; yet notwithstanding this, Mr. Hamilton had never invited him to +his house. + +"His public character, as far at least as it meets our eye, is +unquestionably worthy of admiration," he had said one day to his wife, +"but I know nothing more; of his private character and conduct I am and +must remain ignorant, and therefore I will not expose my children to the +fascination of his society in the intimacy of home." + +Mrs. Hamilton had agreed with him, but it required not the "intimacy of +home" to give Annie an opportunity of persuading Caroline towards +secretly accepting his attentions, and making an impression in his +favour on her heart; and the latter looked to her _entrée_ with the more +pleasure, as she hoped, and with some justice, it would give her many +more opportunities of meeting him than she now enjoyed. She saw before +her, in imagination, a long train of captives whom she would enslave, +still Lord Alphingham in all stood pre-eminent; and visions of varied +nature, but all equally brilliant, floated before her eyes, as she +prepared for the grand ball which, for the first time in her life, she +was about to join. + +The business of the toilette was completed, and we might forgive the +proud smile of exultation which curled round her lip, as she gazed on +the large pier glass which reflected her whole figure. The graceful +folds of the rich white silk that formed her robe suited well with the +tall and commanding form they encircled. The radiant clasp of diamonds +securing the braid of pearls which twined the dark glossy hair, +glittered with unusual brilliancy on that noble yet haughty brow, and +heightened the dazzling beauty of her countenance. The dark eyes +sparkling with animation, her cheek possessing the rose of buoyant youth +and health, the Grecian nose, the lip, which even pride could not rob of +its beauty, all combined to form a face lovely indeed. Fanny had gazed +and admired her young lady with suppressed exclamations of delight, +which were strangely at variance with the sigh that at that instant +sounded on Caroline's ear; she turned hastily and beheld her mother, who +was gazing on her with looks of such excessive tenderness, that a +strange pang of self-reproach darted through her heart, although it was +instantly banished by the fancy, that if it was with a sigh her mother +regarded her on such a night, how could she look for sympathy in the +pleasure then occupying her mind. At Oakwood every feeling, every +anticipation would have been instantly imparted, but now she only longed +to meet Annie, that to her all might be told without restraint. Painful, +indeed, was this unwonted silence of a child to the fond heart of Mrs. +Hamilton, but she refused to notice it. Much, very much, did she wish +to say, but she saw by the countenance of her daughter it might be +considered mistimed; yet to launch the beautiful girl she saw before her +into the labyrinth of the world, without uttering one word of the +thoughts which were thronging on her mind, she felt was impossible. They +might not have the effect she wished, yet she would do her duty. +Desiring Fanny to take her young lady's shawl down stairs, she gently +detained Caroline as she was about to follow her. + +"Listen to me but for a few minutes, my love," she said, in that +affectionate yet impressive tone, which seldom failed to arrest the +attention of her children, "and forgive me, if my words fall harshly and +coldly on your excited fancy. I know well the feelings that are yours, +though you perhaps think I do not, by the involuntary sigh you heard, +and I can sympathise with them, though lately you have refused to seek +my sympathy. Bright as are your anticipations, reality for a time will +be still brighter. Brilliant will be the scenes of enchantment in which +you will mingle,--brilliant indeed, for you are beautiful, my +Caroline--and admiration on all sides will be your own. Why should you +look on me with surprise, my child? that beauty on which perhaps my +heart has often dwelt too proudly, is not my gift nor of your creation. +The Great Being who has given you those charms of face and form will +mark how His gift is used; and oh, forget not for one moment His +all-seeing eye is as much upon you in the crowded ball as in the +retirement of your own room. You will be exposed to more temptations +than have yet been yours; the most dangerous temptations, adulation, +triumph, exciting pleasures of every kind, will be around you. The +world in radiant beauty will loudly call upon you to follow it alone, to +resign all things to become its votary; the trial of prosperity will +indeed be yours. Caroline, my child, for my sake, if not for your own, +resist them all. My happiness is in your hands. Seek your God in this +ordeal, even more than you would in that of adversity; there the spirit +naturally flies from earth, here it clings tenaciously to the world. +Pray to Him to resist the temptations that will surround--implore him to +teach you the best use of those charms He has bestowed on you. Forsake +him not; Caroline, I conjure you, be not drawn away from Him. Do not let +your thoughts be so wholly engrossed by pleasure as to prevent your +bestowing on Him but one hour of your day. Let me clasp my child to my +heart, when we return to Oakwood, unsullied, untouched by the stains of +the world. Let me have the blessed comfort of seeing my Caroline return +to the home of her childhood the same innocent happy being she was when +she left. I have ever endeavoured to make you happy, to give you those +pleasures you naturally desire, to form your character not only for the +happiness of this world, but for that of the next; then if you are ever +tempted to do wrong, if no higher consideration bids you pause, think on +your mother, Caroline; remember my happiness or misery greatly depends +on you, and, oh, if you have ever loved me, pause ere you proceed." + +"Mother, do not doubt me; Caroline Hamilton will never sully the name +she bears," replied Caroline, her eye flashing, and speaking proudly, to +conceal the emotion her mother's words had involuntarily produced. + +Mrs. Hamilton gazed on the haughty and satisfied security the features +of her child expressed. A more softened feeling would at that moment +better have pleased the yearning heart of the mother, but she checked +the rising sigh of disappointment, and folding Caroline to her bosom, +she imprinted a fond kiss on her noble brow, and murmuring, "God in +heaven bless you, my child, and grant you sufficient strength," they +descended the stairs together. + +Brilliant indeed was the scene that met the dazzled eyes of Caroline, as +she entered the elegant suite of rooms of the Duchess of Rothbury. The +highest rank, the greatest talent, the loveliest of beauty's daughters, +the manliest and noblest of her sons, were all assembled in that flood +of light which every apartment might be termed. Yet could the varied +countenances of these noble crowds have clearly marked the character +within, what a strange and varied page in the book of human life might +that ball have unfolded. + +But various as are the characters that compose an assemblage such as +this, the tone is generally given by the character and manner of the +lady of the house, and her Grace the Duchess of Rothbury was admirably +fitted for the position she filled. A daughter of fashion, bred up from +her earliest years in scenes of luxury and pomp, she had yet escaped the +selfishness, the artificial graces, which are there generally +predominant. She had married early in life, a marriage _à la mode_, that +is to say, not of love, but of interest on the part of her parents, and +on her own, dazzled, perhaps, by the exalted rank of the man who had +made her an offer of his hand. They were happy. The highly-principled +mind of the Duchess revolted from that conduct which would, even in the +_on dit_ of a censorious world, have called the very faintest whisper +on her name; and her husband, struck by the unwavering honour and +integrity of her conduct, gradually deserted the haunts of ignoble +pleasures which he had been wont to frequent, and paid her those marks +of consideration and respect, both in public and private life, which she +so greatly deserved. A large family had been the fruits of this union, +all of whom, except her two youngest daughters and two of her sons, were +married, and to the satisfaction of their parents. There was a degree of +reserve, amounting to severity, in the character of the Duchess, which +prevented that same affectionate confidence between her and her children +as subsisted in Mr. Hamilton's family. Yet she had been a kind and +careful mother, and her children ever proved, that surrounded as she +constantly was by the fashionable and the gay, she had presided over the +education of her daughters, and been more than usually particular in the +choice of governesses. Violent as she might be considered in her +prejudices for and against, yet there was that in her manner which alike +prevented the petty feelings of dislike and envy, and equally debarred +her from being regarded with any of that warm affection, for which no +one imagined how frequently she had pined. She stood alone, respected, +by many revered, and she was now content with this, though her youth had +longed for somewhat more. Her chosen friend, spite of the difference of +rank, had been Mr. Hamilton's mother, and she had watched with the +jealousy of true friendship the object of Arthur Hamilton's love. + +A brief yet penetrating survey of Emmeline Manvers' character she took, +and was satisfied. The devotion of Mrs. Hamilton, for so many years, to +her children she had ever admired, and frequently defended her with +warmth when any one ventured before her to condemn her conduct. Mr. and +Mrs. Hamilton regarded her with reverence and affection, and were +gratified at that kindness which insisted that the _entrée_ of Caroline +should take place at her house. + +The Earl and Countess Elmore were also pre-eminent among the +guests--young, noble, exquisitely lovely, the latter at once riveted all +eyes, yet by the graceful dignity of her manner, repelled all advances +of familiarity. She might have been conscious of her charms, she could +not fail to be, but she only valued them as having attracted towards her +the man she loved. She only used them to endear him to his home; and it +was when alone with the Earl, that the sweet playfulness of her +character was displayed to its full extent, and scarcely could he then +believe her the same being who in society charmed as much by her dignity +and elegance, as by her surpassing beauty. The family of the Marquis of +Malvern were also present; they had been long known to Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton, who were glad to resume an intimacy which had been checked by +their retirement, but which had ever been remembered with mutual +pleasure. The Earl of St. Eval, eldest son of the Marquis, might have +been thought by many, who only knew him casually, as undeserving of the +high renown he enjoyed; and many young ladies would have wondered at +Emmeline Hamilton's undisguised admiration. Handsome he certainly was +not; yet intelligence and nobleness were stamped upon that broad +straight, brow, and those dark eyes were capable at times of speaking +the softest emotions of the human heart. But it was only when he +permitted himself to speak with energy that his countenance was +displayed to advantage, and then the bright rays of intellect and +goodness which gilded every feature, aided by the eloquent tones of his +full rich voice, would have made the most careless turn and look again, +and ask why they admired; but such times were few. Reserved, almost +painfully so, he was generally prone in such scenes as this to stand +alone, for few indeed were those of either sex with whom the soul of +Eugene St. Eval could hold commune; but this night there was more +animation than usual glittering in his dark eyes. He was the first of +the admiring crowd to join Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton's party, and petition +for the hand of Caroline in the next quadrille. It was with a smile of +proud satisfaction her father relinquished her to the young man, for she +had consented, although the watchful eye of her mother observed her +glance round the room, as if in search for some other, and a shade of +disappointment pass over her brow, that said her search was fruitless; +that feeling was but momentary, however. She joined the festive throng, +and her young heart beat quicker as she met the many glances of +undisguised admiration fixed constantly upon her. Seldom had Mr. +Hamilton been so beset as he was that night by the number of young men +who pressed forward to implore him for an introduction to his beautiful +daughter; and Caroline's every anticipation of triumph was indeed +fulfilled. Her mother was right. Reality was in this case far more +dazzling than even imagination had been. There were many in that +splendid scene equally, perhaps even more beautiful than Caroline +Hamilton, but she possessed the charm of which almost all around her +were deprived, that of novelty. She was, indeed, a novice amid scenes of +fashion, and the genuine pleasure her countenance expressed, appeared a +relief when compared to many around her. The name of Hamilton had never +been entirely forgotten in London. Their singularity in living so long +in unbroken retirement had been by many ridiculed, by others condemned, +as an attempt to appear better than their neighbours; and many were the +speculations as to whether the saintly Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton would +really do such a wicked thing as introduce their daughters into society, +or whether they would keep the poor girls in the country like nuns, to +be moped to death. Great, therefore, was the astonishment of some, and +equally great the pleasure to others, when Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton +reappeared amongst their London friends; and that night the warm +greetings of many old friends who thronged around them, eager to +introduce to their notice the young members of their families, afforded +a pleasing satisfaction to the heart of Mrs. Hamilton, whose gentle +courtesy and winning smile they found had not in the least deserted her. +The feelings of a mother swelled warmly within her as she gazed on her +child; her fond heart throbbed with chastened pride, as she marked the +unfeigned and respectful admiration Caroline received, and these +emotions, combined with the pleasure she felt at beholding again +well-remembered faces, and hearing the glad tones of eager greeting, +caused this evening to be equally as pleasurable to her, though in a +different way, as it was to Caroline. + +The attentions of Eugene St. Eval to Miss Hamilton continued as +unintermitting as they were respectful the whole of that night; and +Caroline, if she did not encourage, certainly forbade them not. She +listened to him with more attention; she appeared more animated with him +than with any of her other partners, one perhaps, alone excepted, and +yet she had taught her young heart to receive impressions to his +prejudice, which Annie never permitted an opportunity to pass without +carefully instilling. Why did she then permit his attentions? She knew +not; while listening to his voice, there was a fascination about him she +could not resist, but in her solitary hours she studiously banished his +image to give place to one whom, by the representations of Annie, she +persuaded herself that she loved alone. + +Genuine, indeed, had been the enjoyment of Caroline Hamilton, from the +first moment she had entered the ball-room; but if it could be +heightened, it was when, about the middle of the evening, Lord +Alphingham entered. A party of gay young men instantly surrounded him, +but breaking from them all, he attached himself the greater part of the +night to Mr. Hamilton. Only two quadrilles he danced with Caroline, but +they were enough to aid the schemes of Annie. She was at hand to excite, +to an almost painful degree, the mind of her friend, to speak in +rapturous praise of Lord Alphingham, to chain him now and then to her +side, and yet so contrive, that the whole of his conversation was with +Caroline; and yet the conduct of Annie Grahame had been such that night +as rather to excite the admiration than the censure of Mr. Hamilton. +Playfully he combated the prejudice of his wife, who as sportively owned +that Miss Grahame's conduct in society was different to that she had +anticipated; but her penetrative mind felt not the more at ease when she +thought on the friendship that subsisted between Annie and her child. + +"Am I dreaming, or is it Mrs. Hamilton I again behold?" exclaimed an +elderly gentleman, as she came forward, and hastily advancing, seized +both her hands, and pressed them with unfeigned warmth and pleasure, +which greeting Mrs. Hamilton as cordially returned. He was a very old +friend of her father's, and had attained by promotion his present high +rank of Admiral of the Blue, but had been the first captain under whose +orders her lamented brother sailed. Very many, therefore, were the +associations that filled her mind as she beheld him, and her mild eyes +for a moment glistened in uncontrollable emotion. + +"How very many changes have taken place since we have come alongside, +Mrs. Hamilton," the old veteran said, gazing on the blooming matron +before him with almost paternal pleasure. "Poor Delmont! could his kind +heart have borne up against the blow of poor Charles's fate, he surely +would have been happy, if all the tales I hear of his daughter Emmeline +be true." + +"Come and judge for yourself, Sir George; my home must ever be open to +my father's dearest friend," replied Mrs. Hamilton, endeavouring by +speaking playfully to conceal the painful reminiscences called forth by +his words. "I will not vouch for the truth of anything you may have +heard about us in London. You must contrive to moor your ship into the +harbour of Oakwood, and thus gratify us all." + +"Ay, ay; take care that I do not cast anchor there so long, that you +will find the best thing will be to cut the cables, send me adrift, and +thus get rid of me," replied the old sailor, delighted at her addressing +him in nautical phrase. "Your appearance here has belied half the +stories I heard; so now that you have given me permission, I shall set +sail to discover the truth of the rest." + +"You heard, I suppose, that Mr. Hamilton never intended his children to +visit London? They were too good, too--what may I term it?--too perfect, +to mingle with their fellow-creatures; is not that it, Admiral?" +demanded Mrs. Hamilton, with a smile. + +"Ay, ay; something very like it,--but glad to see the wind is changed +from that corner. Don't like solitude, particularly for young +folks,--and how many are here?" + +"Of my children?" The veteran nodded. "But one, my eldest girl. I do not +consider her sister quite old enough to be introduced." + +"And you left her in harbour, and only permitted one frigate to cruise. +If she had any of her uncle Charles's spirit, she would have shown some +little insubordination at that piece of discipline, Mrs. Hamilton," said +the old man, joyously. + +"Not if my authority is established somewhat like Sir George's, on the +basis of affection," replied Mrs. Hamilton, again smiling. + +"Ay, you have learnt that secret of government, have you? Now who would +think this was the little quiet girl I had dandled on my knee, and told +her tales of storm and war that made her shudder? And where are your +sons?" + +"Both at college." + +"What, neither of them a chip of the old block, and neither of them for +the sea? Don't like their taste. No spirit of salt-water within them." + +"But neither of them deficient in spirit for a life on shore. But, +however, to set your heart at ease, for the naval honour of our family, +Sir George, I have a nephew, who, I think, some few years hence will +prove a brave and gallant son of Neptune. The accounts we have of him +are most pleasing. He has inherited all poor Charles's spirit and +daring, as well as that true courage, for which you have said my brother +was so remarkable." + +"Glad of it--glad of it; but what nephew? who is he? A nephew of Mr. +Hamilton's will not raise the glory of the Delmont family; and you had +only one brother, if I remember rightly?" + +"Have you quite forgotten the beautiful girl, who, when I last had the +pleasure of meeting you in such a scene as this, was the object of +universal attraction? You surely remember my father's favourite Eleanor, +Sir George?" + +"Eleanor--Eleanor--let me think;" and the old sailor for a moment put +himself in a musing attitude, and then starting, exclaimed, "to be sure +I do; the loveliest girl I ever cast eyes upon;--and what has become of +her? By the bye, there was some story about her, was there not? She +chose a husband for herself, and ran off, and broke her poor father's +heart. Where is she now?" + +"Let her faults be forgotten, my dear Sir George," replied Mrs. +Hamilton, with some emotion. "They were fully, painfully repented. Let +them die with her." + +"Die! Is she, too, dead? What, that graceful sylph, that exquisite +creature I see before me now, in all the pride of conscious loveliness!" +and the veteran drew his rough hand across his eyes in unfeigned +emotion, then hastily recovering himself, he said, "and this boy--this +sailor is her son. I can hardly believe it possible. Why he surely +cannot be old enough to go to sea." + +"You forget the number of years that have passed, Sir George. Edward is +now eighteen, as old, if not older, than his mother was when you last +saw her." + +"And when did poor Eleanor die?" + +"Six years ago. She had been left a widow in India, and only reached her +native land to breathe her last in my arms. You will be pleased, I +think, with her daughter, though, on second thought, perhaps, she may +not be quite lively enough for you; however, I must beg your notice for +her, as her attachment to her brother is so excessive, that all relating +to the sea is to her in the highest degree interesting." + +"And do your sister's children live with you--had their father no +relations?" + +"None; and even if he had, I should have petitioned to bring them up and +adopt them as my own. Poor children, when their mother died, their +situation was indeed melancholy. Helpless orphans of ten and scarcely +twelve, cast on a strange land, without one single friend to whom they +could look for succour or protection. My heart bled for them, and never +once have I regretted my decision." + +The old man looked at her glowing cheek in admiration, and pressing her +hand, he said warmly, prefacing his words, as he always did, with the +affirmative "ay, ay." + +"Your father's daughter must be somewhat different to others of her +rank. I must come and see you, positively I must. Wind and tide will be +strongly against me, if you do not see me in a few days anchoring off +your coast. No storms disturb your harbour, I fancy. But what has become +of your husband--your daughter? let me see all I can belonging to you. +Come, Mrs. Hamilton, crowd sail, and tow me at once to my wished for +port." + +Entering playfully into the veteran's humour, Mrs. Hamilton took his arm +and returned to the ball-room, where she was speedily joined by her +husband, who welcomed Sir George Wilmot with as much warmth and +cordiality as his wife had done, and as soon as the quadrille was +finished, a glance from her mother brought Caroline and her partner, +Lord Alphingham, to her side. + +The astonishment of Sir George, as Mrs. Hamilton introduced the blooming +girl before him as her daughter, was so irresistibly comic, that no one +present could prevent a smile; and that surprise was heightened when, in +answer to his supposition that she must be the eldest of Mrs. Hamilton's +family, Mrs. Hamilton replied that her two sons were both older, and +Caroline was, indeed, the youngest but one. + +"Then I tell you what, Mrs. Hamilton," the old veteran said, "Old Time +has been playing tricks with me, and drawing me much nearer eternity +than I at all imagined myself, or else he has stopped with me and gone +on with you." + +"Or rather, my good friend," replied Mr. Hamilton, "you can only trace +the hand of Time upon yourself, having no children in whose increasing +years you can behold him, and, therefore, he is very likely to slip the +cable before you are aware; but with us such cannot be." + +"Ay, ay, Hamilton, suppose it must be so--wish I had some children of my +own, but shall come and watch Time's progress on these instead. Ah, Miss +Hamilton, why am I such an old man? I see all the youngsters running off +with the pretty girls, and I cannot venture to ask one to dance with +me." + +"May I venture to ask you then, Sir George? The name of Admiral Wilmot +would be sufficient for any girl, I should think, to feel proud of her +partner, even were he much older and much less gallant than you, Sir +George," answered Caroline, with ready courtesy, for she had often heard +her mother speak of him, and his manner pleased her. + +"Well, that's a pretty fair challenge, Sir George; you must take up the +glove thrown from so fair a hand," observed Lord Alphingham, with a +smile that, to Caroline, and even to her mother, rendered his strikingly +handsome features yet handsomer. "Shall I relinquish my partner?" + +"No, no, Alphingham; you are better suited to her here. At home--at your +_own_ home, Miss Hamilton, one night, I shall remind you of your +promise, and we will trip it together. Now I can only thank you for your +courtesy; it has done my heart good, and reconciled me to my old age." + +"I may chance to find a rival at home, Sir George. If you see my sister, +you will not be content with me. She will use every effort to surpass me +in your good graces; for when I tell her I have seen the brave admiral +whose exploits have often caused her cheek to flush with pride--patriot +pride she calls it--she will be wild till she has seen you." + +"Will she--will she, indeed? Come and see her to-morrow; tell her so, +with an old man's love, and that I scolded your mother heartily for not +bringing her to-night. Mind orders; let me see if you are sailor enough +instinctively to obey an old captain's orders." + +"Trust me, Sir George," replied Caroline, laughingly, and a young man at +that instant addressing her by name, she bowed gracefully to the +veteran, and turned towards him who spoke. + +"Miss Hamilton, I claim your promise for this quadrille," said Lord +Henry D'Este. + +"Good bye," said Sir George. "I shall claim you for my partner when I +see you at home." + +"St. Eval dancing again. Merciful powers! we certainly shall have the +roof tumbling over our heads," exclaimed Lord Henry, as he and Caroline +found themselves _vis à vis_ to the earl of whom he spoke. + +"Why, is it so very extraordinary that a young man should dance?" +demanded Caroline. + +"A philosopher as he is, decidedly. You do not know him, Miss Hamilton. +He travelled all over Europe, I believe, really for the sake of +improvement, instead of enjoying all the fun he might have had; he +stored his brain with all sorts of knowledge, collecting material and +stealing legends to write a book. I went with him part of the way, but +became so tired of my companion, that I turned recreant and fled, to +enjoy a more spirited excursion of my own. I tell him, whenever I want a +lecture on all subjects, I shall come to him. I call him the Walking +Cyclopaedia, and only fancy such a personage dancing a quadrille. What +lady can have the courage to turn over the leaves of the Cyclopaedia in +a quadrille? let me see. Oh, Lady Lucy Melville, our noble hostess's +daughter. She pretends to be a bit of a blue, therefore they are not so +ill-matched as I imagined; however, she is not very bad--not a deep +blue, only just tinged with celestial azure. Sweet creature, how you +will be edified before your lesson is over. Look, Miss Hamilton, on the +other side of the Cyclopaedia. That good lady has been the last seven +years dancing with all her might and main for a husband. There is +another, striving, by an air of elegant hauteur, to prove she is +something very great, when really she is nothing at all. There's a girl +just introduced, as our noble poet says." + +"Take care, take care, Lord Henry; you are treading on dangerous +ground," exclaimed Caroline, unable to prevent laughing at the comic +manner in which her companion criticised the dancers. "You forget that I +too have only just been released, and that this is only my first glimpse +of the world." + +"You do me injustice, Miss Hamilton. I am too delightfully and +refreshingly reminded of that truth to forget it for one instant. You +may have only just made your _début_, but you have not been schooled and +scolded, and frightened into propriety as that unfortunate girl has. If +she has smiled once too naturally, spoken one word too much, made one +step wrong, or said sir, my lord, your lordship, once too often, she +will have such a lecture to-morrow, she will never wish to go to a ball +again." + +"Poor girl!" said Caroline, in a tone of genuine pity, which caused a +smile from her partner. + +"She is not worthy of your pity, Miss Hamilton; she is hardened to it +all. What a set we are dancing with, men and women, all heartless alike; +but I want to know what magic wand has touched St. Eval. I do believe it +must be your eyes, Miss Hamilton. He talks to his partner, and looks at +you; tries to do two things at once, listen to her, and hear your voice. +You are the enchantress, depend upon it." + +A glow of triumph burned on the heart of Caroline at these words. For +though rather prejudiced against St. Eval by the arts of Annie, still, +to make an impression on one whom she had heard was invulnerable to all, +to make the calm, and some said, severely stoical, St. Eval bend beneath +her power, was a triumph she determined to achieve. That spirit of +coquetry so fatal to her aunt, the ill-fated Eleanor, was as innate in +the bosom of Caroline; no opportunity had yet offered to give it play, +still the seeds were there, and she could not resist the temptation now +presented. Even in her childhood Mrs. Hamilton had marked this fatal +propensity. Every effort had been put in force to check it, every gentle +counsel given, but arrested in its growth though it was, erased entirely +it could not be. The principles of virtue had been too carefully +instilled, for coquetry to attain the same ascendancy and indulgence +with Caroline as it had with her aunt, yet she felt she could no longer +control the inclination which the present opportunity afforded her to +use her power. + +"Do you go to the Marchioness of Malvern's fête, next week?" demanded +Lord Henry. Caroline answered in the affirmative. + +"I am glad of it. The Walking Cyclopaedia may make himself as agreeable +there as he has so marvellously done to-night. You will be in fairy +land. He has brought flowers from every country, and reared them for his +mother, till they have become the admiration of all for miles around. I +told him he looked like a market gardener, collecting flowers from every +place he went to. I dragged him away several times, and told him he +would certainly be taken for a country booby, and scolded him for +demeaning his rank with such ignoble pleasures, and what wise answer do +you think he made me?" + +"A very excellent one, I have no doubt." + +"Or it would not come from such a learned personage, Miss Hamilton. +Really it was so philosophic, I was obliged to learn it as a lesson to +retain it. That he, superior as he deemed himself, and that wild flower +which he tended with so much care, were alike the work of Infinite +Wisdom, and as such, the study of the one could not demean the other. I +stared at him, and for the space of a week dubbed him the Preaching +Pilgrim; but I was soon tired of that, and resumed his former one, which +comprises all. I wonder at what letter the walking volume will be opened +at his mother's fête?" + +"I should imagine B," said Caroline, smiling. + +"B--B--what does B stand for? I have forgotten how to spell--let me see. +Ah! I have it,--excellent, admirable! Miss Hamilton. Lecture on Botany +from the Walking Cyclopaedia--bravo! We had better scrape up all our +learning, to prove we are not perfect ignoramuses on the subject." + +Caroline laughingly agreed; and the quadrille being finished, Lord +Henry succeeded in persuading her to accompany him to the +refreshment-room. + +In the meanwhile, perfectly unconscious that he had been the subject of +the animated conversation of his _vis à vis_, St. Eval was finding more +and more to admire in Miss Hamilton. He conducted his partner to her +seat as she desired, and then strolled towards Mr. Hamilton's party, in +the hope that Caroline would soon rejoin her mother; but Annie had been +in the refreshment-room, and she did not reappear for some little time. +Mrs. Hamilton had at length been enabled to seek Lady Helen Grahame, +with whom she remained conversing, for she felt, though the delay was +unavoidable, she partly deserved the reproach with which Lady Helen +greeted her, when she entered, for permitting the whole evening to pass +without coming near her. Mrs. Hamilton perceived, with regret, that she +was more fitted for the quiet of her own boudoir, than the glare and +heat of crowded rooms. Gently she ventured to expostulate with her on +her endeavours, and Lady Helen acknowledged she felt quite unequal to +the exertion, but that the persuasions of her daughter had brought her +there. She was too indolent to add, she had seen nothing of Annie the +whole evening; nor did she wish to say anything that might increase the +disapprobation with which she sometimes felt, though Annie heeded it +not, Mrs. Hamilton regarded her child. It was admiration, almost +veneration, which Lady Helen felt for Mrs. Hamilton, and no one could +have imagined how very frequently the indolent but well-meaning woman +had regretted what she deemed was her utter inability to act with the +same firmness that characterised her friend. She was delighted at the +notice Lilla ever received from her; but blinded by the artful manners +of her elder girl, she often wished that Annie had been the favourite +instead. There was somewhat in Mrs. Hamilton's manner that night that +caused her to feel her own inferiority more than ever; but no +self-reproach mingled with the feeling. She could not be like her, and +then why should she expect or deplore what was impossible. Leaning on +Mrs. Hamilton's arm, she resolved, however, to visit the ball-room, and +they reached Mr. Hamilton at the instant Grahame joined them. + +"You here, Grahame!" exclaimed his friend, as he approached. "I thought +you had forsworn such things." + +"I make an exception to-night," he answered. "I wished to see my fair +friend Caroline where I have longed to see her." + +"You are honoured, indeed, Mrs. Hamilton," Lady Helen could not refrain +from saying. "He was not present at the _entrée_ even of his own +daughter." + +"And why was I not, Lady Helen? because I would not by my presence give +the world reason to say I also approved of the very early age at which +Miss Grahame was introduced. If I do not mistake, she is four months +younger than Caroline, and yet my daughter is no longer a novice in such +scenes as these." + +Lady Helen shrunk in terror from the stern glance of her husband, who +little knew the pain he inflicted; and Mrs. Hamilton hastily, but +cautiously drew her away to enter into conversation with the Marchioness +of Malvern, who was near them, which little manoeuvre quickly removed +the transient cloud; and though soon again compelled to seek the shelter +of the quiet little room she had quitted, the friendly kindness of Mrs. +Hamilton succeeded in making Lady Helen's evening end more agreeably +than it had begun. + +"Are you only just released, Grahame?" demanded Lord Alphingham, who +still remained near Mr. Hamilton. + +"You are less fortunate than I was, or perhaps you will think, in +parliamentary concerns, more so; but as the ball was uppermost in my +thoughts this evening, I was glad to find myself at liberty above an +hour ago." + +"Is there nothing, then, stirring in the Upper House?" + +"Nothing; I saw many of the noble members fast asleep, and those who +spoke said little to the purpose. When do you gentlemen of the Lower +House send up your bill? it will be a charity to give us something to +do." + +"We shall be charitable then on Friday next, and I much doubt if you do +not have some warm debating work. If we succeed, it will be a glorious +triumph; the Whigs are violent against us, and they are by far the +strongest party. I depend greatly on your eloquence, Alphingham." + +"It is yours to the full extent of its power, my good friend; it carries +some weight along with it, I believe, and I would gladly use it in a +good cause." + +"Did you speak to-night, Grahame?" Mr. Hamilton asked, evincing by his +animated countenance an interest in politics, which, from his retired +life, no one believed that he possessed. Grahame eagerly entered into +the detail of that night's debate, and for a little time the three +gentlemen were absorbed in politics alone. The approach of Caroline and +her mother, however, caused Grahame suddenly to break off in his speech. + +"A truce with debates, for the present," he gaily exclaimed. "Hamilton, +I never saw Caroline's extraordinary likeness to you till this moment. +What a noble-looking girl she is! Ah, Hamilton, I could pardon you if +you were much prouder of your children than you are." + +An involuntary sigh broke from his lips as he spoke, but checking it, he +hastened to Caroline, and amused her with animated discourse, till Lord +Alphingham and Eugene St. Eval at the same instant approached, the one +to claim, the other to request, Caroline as his partner in the last +quadrille before supper. The shade of deep disappointment which passed +over the young Earl's expressive countenance as Caroline eagerly +accepted the Viscount's offered arm, and owned she had been engaged to +him some time, at once confirmed to her flattered fancy the truth of +Lord Henry's words, and occasioned a feeling near akin to pleasure in +the equally observant mother. Mrs. Hamilton shrunk with horror at the +idea of introducing her child into society merely for the purpose of +decoying a husband; but she must have been void of natural feeling had +not the thought very often crossed her mind, that the time was drawing +nigh when her daughter's earthly destiny would, in all probability, be +fixed for ever; and in the midst of the tremblings of maternal love the +natural wish would mingle, that noble rank and manly virtue might be the +endowments of him who would wed her Caroline, and amongst those noble +youths with whom she had lately mingled, she had seen but one her fond +heart deemed on all points worthy of her child, and that one was the +young Earl Eugene St. Eval. That he was attracted, her penetrating eye +could scarcely doubt, but farther she would not think; and so great was +her sensitiveness on this head, that much as she admired the young man, +she was much more reserved with him than she would have been had she +suspected nothing of his newly dawning feelings. + +St. Eval did not join in the quadrille, and after lingering by Mrs. +Hamilton till she was invited to the supper-room, he aroused the +increased merriment of his tormentor, Lord Henry, by offering her his +arm, conducting her to supper, and devoting himself to her, he declared, +as if she were the youngest and prettiest girl in the room. + +"Playing the agreeable to mamma, to win the good graces of _la fille_. +Admirable diplomacy; Lord St. Eval, I wish you joy of your new talent," +maliciously remarked Lord Henry, as the Earl and his companion passed +him. A glance from those dark eyes, severe enough to have sent terror to +the soul of any less reckless than Lord Henry, was St. Eval's only +reply, and he passed on; and seldom did Mrs. Hamilton find a companion +more to her taste in a supper-room than the young Earl. The leaves of +the Walking Cyclopaedia were indeed then opened, Henry D'Este would have +said, for on very many subjects did St. Eval allow himself that evening +to converse, which, except to his mother and sisters, were ever locked +in the recesses of his own reflecting mind; but there was a kindness, +almost maternal, which Mrs. Hamilton unconsciously used to every young +person who sought her company, and that charm the young and gifted +nobleman never could resist. He spoke of her sons in a manner that could +not fail to attract a mother's heart. The six months he had spent with +them at college had been sufficient for him to form an intimate +friendship with Percy, whose endeavours to gain his esteem he had been +unable to resist; while he regretted that the reserved disposition of +Herbert, being so like his own, had prevented his knowing him so well as +his brother. He spoke too of a distant relative of Mrs. Hamilton's, the +present Lord Delmont, in whom, as the representative of her ancient +family, she was much interested. St. Eval described with eloquence the +lovely villa he occupied on the banks of Lago Guardia, near the +frontiers of the Tyrol, the health of his only sister, some few years +younger than himself, not permitting them to live in England; he had +given up all the invitations to home and pleasure held out to him by his +father-land, and retiring to Italy, devoted himself entirely to his +mother and sister. + +"He is a brother and son after your own heart, Mrs. Hamilton," concluded +St. Eval, with animation, "and that is the highest compliment I can pay +him." + +Mrs. Hamilton smiled, and as she gazed on the glowing features of the +young man, she thought he who could so well appreciate such virtues +could not be--nay, she knew he was not--deficient in them himself, and +stronger than ever became her secret wish; but she hastily banished it, +and gave her sole attention to the interesting subjects on which St. +Eval continued to speak. + +For some few hours after supper the ball continued, with even, perhaps, +more spirit than it had commenced; but St. Eval did not ask Caroline to +dance again. He fancied she preferred Alphingham's attentions, and his +sensitive mind shrunk from being again refused. Caroline knew not the +heart of him over whom she had resolved to use her power, perhaps if she +had, she would have hesitated in her determination. The least +encouragement made his heart glow with an uncontrollable sensation of +exquisite pleasure, while repulse bade it sink back with an equal if not +a greater degree of pain. St. Eval was conscious of this weakness in his +character; he was aware that he possessed a depth of feeling, which +unless steadily controlled, would tend only to his misery; and it was +for this he clothed himself in impenetrable reserve, and obtained from +the world the character of being proud and disagreeable. He dreaded the +first entrance of love within his bosom, for instinctively he felt that +his very sensitiveness would render the passion more his misery than his +joy. We are rather sceptics in the doctrine of love at first sight, but +in this case it was fervid and enduring, as if it had risen on the solid +basis of intimacy and esteem. From the first hour he had spent in the +society of Caroline Hamilton, Eugene St. Eval loved. He tried to subdue +and conquer his newly-awakened feelings, and would think he had +succeeded, but the next hour he passed in her society brought the truth +clearer than ever before his eyes; her image alone occupied his heart. +He shrunk, in his overwrought sensitiveness, from paying her those +attentions which would have marked his preference; he did not wish to +excite the remarks of the world, nor did he feel that he possessed +sufficient courage to bear the repulse, with which, if she did not +regard him, and if she were the girl he fancied her, she would cheek his +forwardness. But his heart beat high, and it was with some difficulty he +controlled his emotion, when he perceived that Caroline refused to dance +even with Lord Alphingham on several occasions, to continue conversing +with himself. How his noble spirit would have chafed and bled, could he +have known it was love of power and coquetry that dictated her manner, +and not regard, as for the time he allowed himself to fancy. + +The evening closed, the noble guests departed, and daylight had resumed +its reign over the earth by the time Mr. Hamilton's carriage stopped in +Berkeley Square. Animatedly had Caroline conversed with her parents on +the pleasures of the evening during their drive; but when she reached +her own room, when Martyn had left her, and she was alone, she was not +quite sure if a few faint whisperings of self-reproach did not in a +degree alloy the retrospection of this her first glimpse of the gay +world; but quickly--perhaps too quickly--they were banished. The +attentions of Lord Alphingham--heightened in their charm by Miss +Grahame's positive assurance to her friend that the Viscount was +attracted, there was not the very slightest doubt of it--and the +proposed pleasure of compelling the proud, reserved St. Eval to yield to +her fascinations, alone occupied her fancy. To make him her captive +would be triumph indeed. She wished, too, to show Annie she was not so +completely under control as she fancied; that she, too, could act with +the spirit of a girl of fashion; and to choose St. Eval, and +succeed--charm him to her side--force him to pay her attentions which no +other received, would, indeed, prove to her fashionable companions that +she was not so entirely governed by her mother, so very simple and +spiritless as they supposed. Her power should do that which all had +attempted in vain. Her cheek glowed, her heart burned with the bright +hope of expected triumph, and when she at length sunk to sleep, it was +to dream of St. Eval at her feet. + +Oh! were the counsels, the example, the appeal of her mother all +forgotten? Was this a mother's recompense? Alas! alas! + + + + +CHAPTER IV. + + +Numerous were the cards and invitations now left at Mr. Hamilton's door; +and the world, in its most tempting form, was indeed spread before +Caroline, although, perhaps, compared with the constant routine of +pleasure pursued by some young ladies who attend two or three assemblies +each of the six nights out of the seven, her life could scarcely be +called gay. Mr. Hamilton had drawn a line, and, difficult as it was to +keep, he adhered to his resolution, notwithstanding the entreaties of +his friends, and very often those of his daughter. A dinner-party and a +ball he would sometimes permit Caroline to attend in one day, but the +flying from house to house, to taste of every pleasure offered, he never +would allow. Nor did he or any member of his family ever attend the +Opera on Saturday night, however great might be the attractions. To +Emmeline this was a great privation, as poetry and music had ever been +her chief delights, and the loss of even one night's enjoyment was felt +severely; but she acquiesced without a murmur, appreciating the truth of +her father's remark, that it was impossible to pay attention to the +Sabbath duties when the previous evening had been thus employed. She +knew, too, how difficult it was to attend to her studies (due regard for +which her parents required amidst every recreation) on the Wednesday, +with every air she had so delighted in the previous night ringing in her +ears. Those who were eager to condemn Mrs. Hamilton whenever they +could, declared it was the greatest inconsistency to take Emmeline to +the Opera, and permit her to appear so often in company at home, and yet +in other matters he so strict; why could she not bring her out at once, +instead of only tantalizing her? but Mrs. Hamilton could never do +anything like anybody else. Her daughters were much to be pitied; and as +for her niece, she must pass a miserable life, for she was scarcely ever +seen. They had no doubt, with all Mrs. Hamilton's pretensions to +goodness, that her poor niece was utterly neglected, and kept quite in +the background; because she was so beautiful, Mrs. Hamilton was jealous +of the notice she might obtain. + +So thought, and so very often spoke, the ill-natured half of the world, +who, in reality, jealous and displeased at being excluded from Mr. +Hamilton's visiting list, did everything in their power to lessen the +estimation in which the family was held. In this, however, they could +not succeed, nor in causing pain to those whom they wished to wound. +Such petty malice demanded not a second thought from minds so +well-regulated as those of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton. Mrs. Hamilton, indeed, +turned their ill-natured remarks to advantage, for instead of neglecting +or wholly despising them, she considered them in her own heart, and in +solitary reflection pondered deeply if she in any way deserved them. She +knew that the lesson of self-knowledge is never entirely learnt; and she +knew too, that an enemy may say that in ill-will or malice which may +have some foundation, though our friends, aided by self-love, may have +hidden the truth from us. Deeply did this noble woman think on her plan +of conduct; severely she scrutinized its every motive, and she was at +peace. Before entering upon it she had implored the Divine blessing, and +she felt that, in the case of Emmeline and Ellen, her prayers for +guidance had not been unheeded. Perhaps her conduct, with regard to the +former, might have appeared inconsistent; but she felt no ill-will +towards those who condemned, knowing the disposition of her child, and +certainly those who thus spoke did not. + +Although there was little more than fourteen months difference between +the age of the sisters, Emmeline was so much a child in simplicity and +feeling, that her mother felt assured it would neither be doing her good +nor tending to her happiness to introduce her with her sister; as, from +the little difference in their ages, some mothers might have been +inclined to do. Yet she did not wish to keep her in such entire +seclusion as some, even of her friends, advised, but permitted her the +enjoyment of those innocent pleasures natural to her taste. Emmeline had +never once murmured at this arrangement; however it interfered with her +most earnest wishes, her confidence in her parents was such, that she +ever submitted to their wishes with cheerfulness. Mrs. Hamilton knew and +sympathised in her feelings at leaving Oakwood. She felt there were +indeed few pleasures in London that could compensate to a disposition +such as Emmeline's for those she had left. She had seen, with joy and +thankfulness, the conquest of self which her child had so perseveringly +achieved; and surely she was not wrong to reward her, by giving her +every gratification in her power, and endeavouring to make her as happy +as she was at Oakwood. Emmeline was no longer a child, and these +pleasures interfered not with the attention her parents still wished her +to bestow on the completion of her education. With all the innocence and +quiet of a young child she enjoyed the select parties given by her +mother with the same zest, but with the poetic feelings of dawning +youth. She absolutely revelled in the Opera, and there her mother +generally accompanied her once a week. An artist might have found a +pleasing study in the contemplation of that young, bright face, as she +sat entranced, every sense absorbed in the music which she heard, the +varying expression of her countenance reflecting every emotion acted +before her. At such moments the fond mother felt it to be impossible to +deny the young enthusiast the rich treat these musical recreations +afforded. A smile or look of sympathy was ever ready to meet the often +uncontrolled expressions of delight which Emmeline could not suppress, +for in thus listening to the compositions of our great masters, even +those much older than Emmeline can seldom entirely command their +emotions. Natural as were the manners of Caroline in public, they almost +resembled art when compared with those of her sister. Mrs. Hamilton's +lesson on self-control had not been forgotten. Emmeline generally +contrived to behave with perfect propriety, except in moments of +excitement such as these, where natural enthusiasm and almost childish +glee would have their play, and her mother could not, would not check +them. + +With regard to Ellen, the thoughtless remarks of the world were indeed +unfounded, as all who recollect the incidents detailed in former pages +will readily believe. Her health still continued so delicate as +frequently to occasion her aunt some anxiety. Through the winter, +strange to say, she had not suffered, but the spring brought on, at +intervals, those depressing feelings of languor which Mrs. Hamilton +hoped had been entirely conquered. The least exertion or excitement +caused her to suffer the following day, and therefore, except at very +small parties, she did not appear even at home. No one could suspect +from her quiet and controlled manner, and her apparently inanimate +though beautiful features, that she was as enthusiastic in mind and in +the delights of the Opera as her cousin Emmeline. By no one we do not +mean her aunt, for Mrs. Hamilton could now trace every feeling of that +young and sorrowing heart, and she saw with regret, that in her niece's +present state of health, even that pleasure must be denied her, for the +very exertion attendant on it was too much. Ellen never expressed +regret, nor did she ever breathe even to her aunt how often, how very +often, she longed once again to enjoy the fresh air of Oakwood, for +London to her possessed not even the few attractions it did to Emmeline. +She ever struggled to be cheerful, to smile when her aunt looked +anxiously at her, and strove to assure her that she was happy, perfectly +happy. Her never appearing as Emmeline did, and so very seldom even at +home, certainly gave matter for observation to those who, seeking for +it, refused to believe the true reason of her retirement. Miss Harcourt, +though she steadfastly refused to go out with her friend--for Mrs. +Hamilton never could allow that she filled any situation save that of a +friend and relation of the family--yet sometimes accompanied Emmeline to +the Opera, and always joined Mrs. Hamilton at home. Many, therefore, +were the hours Ellen spent entirely alone, but she persevered +unrepiningly in the course laid down for her by the first medical man in +London, whom her aunt had consulted. + +How she employed those lonely hours Mrs. Hamilton never would inquire. +Perfect liberty to follow her own inclinations she should enjoy at +least; but it was not without pain that Mrs. Hamilton so frequently left +her niece. She knew that the greatest privation, far more than any of +the pleasures her cousins enjoyed, was the loss of her society. The +mornings and evenings were now so much occupied, that it often happened +that the Sabbath and the evening previous were the only times Ellen +could have intercourse of any duration with her. She regretted this +deeply, for Ellen was no longer a child; she was at that age when life +is in general keenly susceptible to the pleasures of society; and +reserved as was her disposition, Mrs. Hamilton felt assured, the loss of +that unchecked domestic intercourse she had so long enjoyed at Oakwood +was pain, though never once was she heard to complain. These contrary +duties frequently grieved the heart of her aunt. Often she accompanied +Caroline when her inclination prompted her to remain at home; for she +loved Ellen as her own child, and to tend and soothe her would sometimes +have been the preferable duty; but she checked the wish, for suffering +and solitary as was Ellen, Caroline, in the dangerous labyrinth of the +world, required her care still more. + +There are trials which the world regards not--trials on which there are +many who look lightly--those productive of no interest, seldom of +sympathy, but with pain to the sufferer; it is when health fails, not +sufficiently to attract notice, but when the disordered state of the +nerves renders the mind irritable, the body weak; when from that +invisible weakness, little evils become great, the temper loses its +equanimity, the spirits their elasticity, we scarcely know wherefore, +and we reproach ourselves, and add to our uneasiness by thinking we are +becoming pettish and ill-tempered, enervated and repining; we dare not +confess such feelings, for our looks proclaim not failing health, and +who would believe us? when the very struggle for cheerfulness fills the +eye with tears, the heart with heaviness, and we feel provoked at our +peevishness, and angry that we are so different now to what we have +been; and we fancy, changed as we are, all we love can no longer regard +us as formerly. Such are among the trials of woman, unknown, frequently +unsuspected, by her nearest and dearest relations; and bitter indeed is +it when such trials befall us in early youth, when liveliness and +buoyancy are expected, and any departure therefrom is imagined to +proceed from causes very opposite to the truth. Such at present were the +trials of the orphan; but they were softened by the kindness and +sympathy of her aunt, who possessed the happy art of soothing more +effectually in a few words than others of a less kindly mould could ever +have accomplished. + +It is in the quick perception of character, in the adaptation of our +words to those whom we address, that in domestic circles renders us +beloved, and forms the fascination of society. Sympathy is the charm of +human life, and when once that is made apparent, we are not slow in +discovering or imagining others. Some people find the encouragement of +sympathy disagreeable, for they say it makes them miserable for no +purpose. What care they for the woes and joys of their acquaintances? +Often a tax, and never a pleasure. Minds of such nature know not that +there is a "joy in the midst of grief;" but Mrs. Hamilton did, and she +encouraged every kindly feeling of her nature. Previous to her marriage, +she had been perhaps too reserved and shrinking within herself, fancied +there was no one of her own rank at least who could understand her, and +therefore none with whom she could sympathise. But the greater +confidence of maturer years, the example of her husband, the emotions of +a wife and mother, had enlarged her heart, and caused her, by ready +sympathy with others, to increase her own enjoyments, and render herself +more pleasing than perhaps, if she had remained single, she ever would +have been. It was this invisible charm that caused her to be admired and +involuntarily loved, even by those who, considering her a saint at +first, shrunk in dread from her society, and it was this that rendered +the frequent trials of her niece less difficult to bear. + +"Does my Ellen remember a little conversation we had on the eve of her +last birthday?" demanded Mrs. Hamilton of her niece one evening, as she +had finished dressing, to attend her daughter to the Opera, and Martyn, +at her desire, had obeyed Caroline's impatient summons, and left to +Ellen the task of fastening her lady's jewels. + +Whenever nothing occurred to prevent it, Ellen was generally with her +aunt at dressing-time, and the little conversation that passed between +them at such periods frequently rendered Ellen's solitary evening +cheerful, when otherwise it might have been, from her state of health +and apparently endless task, even gloomy. Mrs. Hamilton had observed a +more than usual depression that evening in the manners of her niece, +and, without noticing, she endeavoured to remove it. Ellen was bending +down to clasp a bracelet as she spoke, and surprised at the question, +looked up, without giving herself time to conceal an involuntary tear, +though she endeavoured to remove any such impression, by smiling +cheerfully as she replied in the affirmative. + +"And will it cheer your solitary evenings, then, my dear Ellen?" she +continued, drawing her niece to her, and kissing her transparent brow, +"if I say that, in the self-denial, patience, and submission you are now +practising, you are doing more, towards raising your character in my +estimation, and banishing from remembrance the painful past, than you +once fancied it would ever be in your power to do. I think I know its +motive, and therefore I do not hesitate to bestow the meed of praise you +so well deserve." + +For a minute Ellen replied not, she only raised her aunt's hand to her +lips and kissed it, as if to hide her emotion before she spoke, but her +eyes were still swelling with tears as she looked up and +replied--"Indeed, my dearest aunt, I do not deserve it. You do not know +how irritable and ill-tempered I often feel." + +"Because you are not very well, my love, and yet you do not feel +sufficiently ill to complain. I sometimes fancy such a state of health +as yours is more difficult to bear than a severe though short illness, +then, you can, at least, claim soothing consolation and sympathy. Now my +poor Ellen thinks she can demand neither," she added, smiling. + +"I always receive both from you," replied Ellen, earnestly; "and not +much submission is required when that is the case, and I am told my +health forbids my sharing in Emmeline's pleasures." + +"No, love, there would not be, if you felt so ill as to have no desire +for them; but that is not the case, for I know you very often feel quite +well enough to go out with me, and I am quite sure that my Ellen +sometimes wishes she were not so completely prohibited such amusements." + +"I thought I had succeeded better in concealing those wishes," replied +Ellen, blushing deeply. + +"So you have, my dear girl, no one but myself suspects them; and you +could not expect to conceal them from me, Ellen, could you, when +Emmeline says it is utterly impossible to hide her most secret thought +from my mystic wand? Do not attempt more, my love; persevere in your +present conduct, and I shall be quite satisfied. Have you an interesting +book for to-night, or is there any other employment you prefer?" + +"You have banished all thoughts of gloom, my dear aunt, and perhaps, +instead of reading, I shall work and think on what you have said," +exclaimed Ellen, her cheek becoming more crimsoned than it was before, +and exciting for the moment the attention of her aunt. She, however, +soon permitted it to pass from her thoughts, for she knew the least +emotion generally had that effect. Little did she imagine how those +solitary hours were employed. Little did she think the cause of that +deep blush, or guess the extent of comfort her words had bestowed on her +niece, how they cheered the painful task the orphan believed it her duty +to perform. Spite of many obstacles of failing health, she +perseveringly continued, although as yet she approached not the end of +her desires. No gleam of light yet appeared to say her toil was nearly +over, her wish obtained. + +The limits of our tale, as well as the many histories of individuals +these memoirs of the Hamilton family must embrace, will not permit us to +linger on the scenes of gaiety in which Caroline now mingled, and which +afforded her, perhaps, too many opportunities for the prosecution of her +schemes; Miss Grahame's task was no longer difficult. Her confidence +once given to another, she could not recall to bestow it upon her +mother, from whom, the more she mingled in society, the more she became +estranged; and Annie became at once her confidant and adviser. Eager to +prove she was not the simple-minded being she was believed, Caroline +confided her designs, with regard to St. Eval, to Miss Grahame, who, as +may be supposed, heightened and encouraged them. Had any one pointed out +to Caroline she was acting with duplicity, departing from the line of +truth to which, even in her childhood, in the midst of many other +faults, she had beautifully and strictly adhered, she might have shrunk +back in horror; but where was the harm of a little innocent flirtation? +Annie would repeatedly urge, if she fancied a doubt of the propriety of +such conduct was rising in her friend's mind, and she was ready with +examples of girls of high birth and exemplary virtues who practised it +with impunity: it gave a finish to the character of a woman, proved she +would sometimes act for herself, not always be in leading-strings; it +gave a taste of power, gratified her ambition; in short, flirtation was +the very acme of enjoyment, and gave a decided _ton_ before and after +marriage. + +St. Eval was not sanguine. But it was in vain he tried to resist the +fascinations of the girl he loved, he could not for an instant doubt but +that she encouraged him; he even felt grateful, and loved her more for +those little arts and kindnesses with which she ever endeavoured to draw +him from his reserve, and chain him to her side. Could that noble spirit +imagine she only acted thus to afford herself amusement for the time, +and prove her power to her companions? Could she, the child of Mr. and +Mrs. Hamilton, act otherwise than honourably? We may pardon Lord St. +Eval for believing it impossible, but bitterly was he deceived. Even her +mother, her penetrating, confiding mother, was deceived, and no marvel +then that such should be the case with a comparative stranger. + +Had Caroline's manner been more generally coquettish, Mrs. Hamilton's +eyes might have been opened; but her behaviour in general was such as +rather to diminish than increase those fears which, before her child had +joined the world, had very frequently occupied her anxious heart. To +strangers even, her encouragement of St. Eval might not have been +observable, though it was clearly so to the watchful eyes of her +parents, whose confidence in their daughter's integrity was such as +entirely to exonerate her in their minds from any intention of coquetry. +In this instance, perhaps, their regard for the young Earl himself, and +their mutual but secret wishes might have heightened their belief, that +not only was St. Eval attracted but that Caroline encouraged him, and +feeling this they regretted that Lord Alphingham should continue his +attentions, which Caroline never appeared to receive with any particular +pleasure. + +Anxious as had been Mrs. Hamilton's feelings with regard to the +friendship subsisting between her daughter and Annie Grahame, she little +imagined how painfully the influence of the latter had already tarnished +the character of the former. Few are aware of the danger arising from +those very intimate connections which young women are so fond of +forming. Every mother should study, almost as carefully as those of her +own, the character of her children's intimate friends. Mrs. Hamilton had +done so, and as we know, never approved of Caroline's intimacy with +Annie, but yet she could not check their intercourse while such intimate +friendship existed between her husband and Montrose Grahame. She knew, +too, that the latter felt pleasure in beholding Caroline the chosen +friend of his daughter; and though she could never hope as Grahame did, +that the influence of her child would improve the character of his, she +had yet sufficient confidence in Caroline at one time to believe that +she would still consider her mother her dearest and truest friend, and +thus counteract the effects of Annie's ill-directed eloquence. In this +hope she had already found herself disappointed; but still, though +Caroline refused her sympathy, and bestowed it, as so many other girls +did, on a companion of her own age, she relied perhaps too fondly on +those principles she had so carefully instilled in early life, and +believed that no stain would sully the career of her much-loved child. +If Mrs. Hamilton's affection in this instance completely blinded her, if +she acted too weakly in not at once breaking this closely woven chain of +intimacy, her feelings, when she knew all, were more than sufficient +chastisement. Could the noble, the honourable, the truth-loving mother +for one instant imagine that Caroline, the child whose early years had +caused her so much pain, had called forth so many tearful prayers--the +child whose dawning youth had been so fair, that her heart had nearly +lost its tremblings--that her Caroline should encourage one young man +merely to indulge in love of power, and what was even worse, to thus +conceal her regard for another? Yet it was even so. Caroline really +believed that not only was she an object of passionate love to the +Viscount, but that she returned the sentiment with equal if not +heightened warmth, and, as the undeniable token of true love, she never +mentioned his name except to her confidant. In the first of these +conjectures she was undoubtedly right; as sincerely as a man of his +character could, Lord Alphingham did love Miss Hamilton, and the +fascination of his manner, his insinuating eloquence, and ever ready +flattery, all combined, might well cause this novice in such matters to +believe her heart was really touched; but that it truly was so not only +may we be allowed to doubt, but it appeared that Annie did so also, by +her laborious efforts to fan the newly ignited spark into a name, and +never once permit Caroline to look into herself; and she took so many +opportunities of speaking of those silly, weak-spirited girls, that went +with a tale of love directly to their mothers, and thus very frequently +blighted their hopes and condemned them to broken hearts, by their +duennas' caprices, that Caroline shrunk from the faintest wish to +confide all to her mother, with a sensation amounting almost to fear and +horror. Eminently handsome and accomplished as Lord Alphingham was, +still there was somewhat in his features, or rather their expression, +that did not please, and scarcely satisfied Mrs. Hamilton's penetration. +Intimate as he was with Grahame, friendly as he had become with her +husband, she could not overcome the feeling of repugance with which she +more than once found herself unconsciously regarding him; and she felt +pleased that Mr. Hamilton steadily adhered to his resolution in not +inviting him to his house. To have described what she disliked in him +would have been impossible, it was indefinable; but there was a casual +glance of that dark eye, a curl of that handsome mouth, a momentary +knitting of the brow, that whispered of a mind not inwardly at peace; +that restless passions had found their dwelling-place around his heart. +Mrs. Hamilton only saw him in society: it was uncharitable perhaps to +judge him thus; but the feelings of a mother had rendered her thus +acute, had endowed her with a penetration unusually perceptive, and she +rejoiced that Caroline gave him only the meed of politeness, and that no +sign of encouragement was displayed in her manner towards him. + +That mother's fears were not unfounded. Lord Alphingham loved Caroline, +but the love of a libertine is not true affection, and such a character +for the last fourteen years of his life he had been; nine years of that +time he had lived on the Continent, gay, and courted, in whatever +country he resided, winning many a youthful heart to bid it break, or +lure it on to ruin. It was only the last year he had returned to +England, and as he had generally assumed different names in the various +parts of the Continent he had visited, the adventures of his life were +unknown in the land of his birth, save that they were sometimes +whispered by a few in similar coteries, and then more as conjecture than +reality. So long a time had elapsed, that the wild errors of his youth, +which had been perhaps the original cause of his leaving England, were +entirely forgotten, as if such things had never been, and the Viscount +now found himself quite as much, if not more, an object of universal +attraction in his native land than he had been on the Continent. He was +now about thirty, and perfect indeed in his vocation. The freshness, +_naïveté_, and perfect innocence of Caroline had captivated his fancy +perhaps even more than it had ever been before, and her perfect +ignorance of the ways of the fashionable world encouraged him to hope +his conquest of her heart would be very easy. He had found an able +confidant and advocate in Miss Grahame, who had contrived to place +herself with her father's friend on the footing of most friendly +intimacy, and partly by her advice and the suggestions of his own heart +he determined to win the regard of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, before he +openly paid attentions to their daughter. With the former he appeared +very likely to succeed, for the talent he displayed in the House, his +apparently earnest zeal for the welfare of his country, her church and +state, his masterly eloquence, and the interest he felt for Grahame, +were all qualities attractive in the eyes of Mr. Hamilton; and though he +did not yet invite him to his house, he never met him without evincing +pleasure. With Mrs. Hamilton, Alphingham did not find himself so much at +ease, nor fancy he was so secure; courteous she was indeed, but in her +intercourse with him she had unconsciously recalled much of what Grahame +termed the forbidding reserve of years past. In vain he attempted with +her to pass the barriers of universal politeness, and become intimate; +his every advance was repelled coldly, yet not so devoid of courtesy as +to make him suspect she had penetrated his secret character. Still he +persevered in unwavering and marked politeness, although Annie's +representations of Mrs. Hamilton's character had already caused him to +determine in his own mind to make Caroline his wife, with or without her +mother's approval; and he amused himself with believing that, as her +mother was so strict and stern as to keep her children, particularly +Caroline, in such subjection, it would be doing the poor girl a charity +to release her from such thraldom, and introduce her, as his wife, into +scenes far more congenial to her taste, where she would be free from +such keen _surveillance_. In these thoughts he was ably seconded by +Annie, who was constantly pitying Caroline's enslaved situation, and +condemning Mrs. Hamilton's strict severity, declaring it was all +affectation; she was not a degree better than any one else, who did not +make half the fuss about it. Lord Alphingham's resolution was taken, +that before the present season was over, Caroline should be engaged to +him, _nolens volens_ on the part of her parents, and he acted +accordingly. + +As opposite as were the characters, so was the conduct of Caroline's two +noble suitors. St. Eval, spite of the encouragement he received, yet +shrunk from paying any marked attention either to Caroline or her +parents. It was by degrees he became intimate in their family, but +there, perhaps, the only person with whom he felt entirely at ease was +Emmeline, who, rejoicing at Caroline's change of manner, began to hope +her feelings were changing too, and indulged in hopes that one day Lord +St. Eval might really be her brother. Emmeline knew her sister's opinion +of coquetry was very different to hers; but this simple-minded girl +could never have conceived that scheme of duplicity, which, by the aid +and counsel of Annie, Caroline now practised. She scarcely ever saw +Alphingham, and never hearing her sister name him, and being perfectly +unconscious of his attentions when they met, she could not, even in her +unusually acute imagination, believe him St. Eval's rival. More and more +enamoured the young Earl became each time he felt himself an especial +object of Caroline's notice; his heart throbbed and his hopes grew +stronger, still he breathed not one word of love, he dared not. +Diffident of his own attractive qualities, he feared to speak, till he +thought he could be assured of her affections. In the intoxication of +love, he felt her refusal would have more effect upon him than he could +bear. He shrunk from the remarks of the world, and waited yet a little +longer, ere with a trembling heart he should ask that all-important +question. So matters stood in Mr. Hamilton's family during the greater +part of the London season; but as it is not our task to enter into +Caroline's gaieties, we here may be permitted to mention Mrs. Greville's +departure with her delicate and suffering child from the land of their +birth. + +Mr. Greville had made no opposition to their intended plan. Seriously +Mr. Maitland had told him that the life of his child depended on her +residence for some time abroad, in a genial climate and extreme quiet; +but in vain did Mrs. Greville endeavour to believe that affection for +his daughter and herself occasioned this unwonted acquiescence; it was +too clearly to be perceived that he was pleased at their separation from +himself, for it gave him more liberty. She wrote to her son, imploring +him in the most earnest and affectionate manner to return home for the +Easter vacation, that she might see him for a few days before she left +England--perhaps never to return. Ruined from earliest boyhood by weak +indulgence, Alfred Greville felt sometimes a throb of natural feeling +for his mother, though her counsels were of no avail. Touched by the +mournful solemnity and deep affection breathing in every line, he +complied with her request, and spent four or five days peacefully at +home. He appeared shocked at the alteration he found in his sister, and +was kinder than he had previously been in his manner towards her. He had +lately become heir to a fortune and estate, left him by a very old and +distant relative of his father, and it was from this he had determined, +he told his father, to go to Cambridge and cut a dash there with the +best of them. He was now eighteen, and believed himself no +inconsiderable personage, in which belief he was warmly encouraged by +his mistaken father. It was strange that, with such an income, he +permitted the favourite residence of his mother and sister to be +sold--but so it was. The generous feelings of his early childhood had +been completely blunted, and to himself alone he intended to appropriate +that fortune, when a portion would yet have removed many of Mrs. +Greville's anxious fears for the future. Alfred intended, when he was of +age, to be one of the first men of fashion; but he did not consider, +that if he "cut a dash" at college, with the _éclat_ he wished, that +before three years had passed, he would not be much richer than he had +been when the fortune was first left him. + +"Mother, you will drive me from you," he one day exclaimed, in passion, +as she endeavoured to detain him. "If you wish ever to see me, let me +take my own way. Advice I will not brook, and reproach I will not bear; +if you love me, be silent, for I will not be governed." + +"Alfred, I will speak!" replied his almost agonized parent, urged on by +an irresistible impulse. "Child of my love, my prayers! Alfred, I will +not see you go wrong, without one effort, one struggle to guide you in +the right path. Alfred, I leave England--my heart is bursting; for +Mary's sake alone I live, and if she be taken from me, Alfred, we shall +never meet again. My son, oh, if you ever loved me, listen to me now, +they may be the last words you will ever hear from your mother's lips. I +implore, I beseech you to turn from your evil courses, Alfred!" and she +suddenly sunk at his feet, the mother before the son. So devoted, so +fervid was the love with which she regarded him, that had she been told, +that to lure him to virtue her own life must be the forfeit, willingly +at that moment would she have died. She continued with an eloquence of +such beseeching tenderness, it would have seemed none could have heard +it unmoved. "Alfred, your mother kneels to you, your own mother. Oh, +hear her; do not condemn her to wretchedness. Let me not suffer more. +You have sought temptation; oh, fly from it; seek the companionship of +those who will lead you to honour, not to vice. Break from those +connections you have weaved around you. Turn again to the God you have +deserted. Oh, do not live as you have done; think on the responsibility +each year increases. My child, my beloved, in mercy refuse not your +mother's prayer! reject not my advice, Alfred! Alfred!" and she clung to +him, while her voice became hoarse with intense anguish. "Oh, promise me +to turn from your present life. Promise me to think on my words, to +seek the footstool of mercy, and return again to Him who has not +forsaken you. Promise me to live a better life; say you will be your +mother's comfort, not her misery--her blessing, not her curse. My child, +my child, be merciful!" Longer, more imploring still would she have +pleaded, but voice failed, and it was only on those chiselled features +the agony of the soul could have been discovered. Alfred gazed on her +thus kneeling at his feet--his mother, she, who in his infancy had knelt +beside him, to guide on high his childish prayers. The heart of the +misguided boy was softened, tears filled his eyes. He would have spoken; +he would have pledged himself to do all that she had asked, when +suddenly the ridicule of his companions flashed before his fancy. Could +he bear that? No; he could see his mother at his feet, but he could not +meet the ridicule of the world. He raised her hastily, but in perfect +silence; pressed her to his heart, kissed her cheek repeatedly, then +placed her on a couch, and darted from her presence. He had said no +word, he had given no sign; and for several hours that mother could not +overcome internal wretchedness so far even as to join her Mary. He +returned to Cambridge. They parted in affection; seldom had the reckless +boy evinced so much emotion as he did when he bade farewell to his +mother and sister. He folded Mary to his bosom, and implored her, in a +voice almost inaudible, to take care of her own health for the sake of +their mother; but when she entreated him to come and see them in their +new abode as soon as he could, he answered not. Yet that emotion had +left a balm on the torn heart of his mother. She fancied her son, +wayward as he was, yet loved her; and though she dared not look forward +to his reformation, still, to feel he loved her--oh, if fresh zeal were +required in her prayers, that knowledge gave it. + +The first week in May they left Greville Manor. Still weak and +suffering, the struggle to conceal and subdue all she felt at leaving, +as she thought for ever, the house of her infancy, of her girlhood, her +youth, was almost too much for poor Mary; and her mother more than once +believed she would not reach in life the land they were about to seek. +The sea breezes, for they travelled whenever they could along the shore, +in a degree nerved her; and by the time they reached Dover, ten days +after they had left the Manor, she had rallied sufficiently to ease the +sorrowing heart of her mother of a portion of its burden. + +They arrived at Dover late in the evening, and early the following day, +as Mary sat by the large window of the hotel, watching with some +appearance of interest the bustling scene before her, a travelling +carriage passed rapidly by and stopped at the entrance. She knew the +livery, and her heart throbbed almost to suffocation, as it whispered +that Mr. Hamilton would not come alone. + +"Mother, Mr. Hamilton has arrived," she succeeded at length in saying. +"And Emmeline--is it, can it be?" But she had no more time to wonder, +for ere she had recovered the agitation the sight of one other of Mr. +Hamilton's family had occasioned, they were in the room, and Emmeline +springing forward, had flung herself on Mary's neck; and utterly unable +to control her feelings at the change she beheld in her friend, wept +passionately on her shoulder. Powerfully agitated, Mary felt her +strength was failing, and had it not been for Mr. Hamilton's support, +she would have fallen to the ground. He supported her with a father's +tenderness to the couch, and reproachfully demanded of Emmeline if she +had entirely forgotten her promise of composure. + +"Do not reprove her, my dear friend," said Mrs. Greville, as she drew +the weeping girl affectionately to her. "My poor Mary is so quickly +agitated now, that the pleasure of seeing three instead of one of our +dear-valued friends has been sufficient of itself to produce this +agitation. And you, too, Herbert," she continued, extending her hand to +the young man, who hastily raised it to his lips, as if to conceal an +emotion which had paled his cheek, almost as a kindred feeling had done +with Mary's. "Have you deserted your favourite pursuits, and left Oxford +at such a busy time, merely to see us before we leave? This is kind, +indeed." + +"I left Percy to work for me," answered Herbert, endeavouring to hide +emotion under the veil of gaiety. "As to permit you to leave England +without once more seeing you, and having one more smile from Mary, I +would not, even had the whole honour of my college been at stake. You +must not imagine me so entirely devoted to my hooks, dear Mrs. Greville, +as to believe I possess neither time nor inclination for the gentler +feelings of human nature." + +"I know you too well, and have known you too long, to imagine that," +replied Mrs. Greville, earnestly. "And is Mary so completely to engross +your attention, Emmeline," she added, turning towards the couch where +the friends sat, "that I am not to hear a word of your dear mother, +Caroline, or Ellen? Indeed, I cannot allow that." + +The remark quickly produced a general conversation, and Herbert for the +first time addressed Mary. A strange, unconquerable emotion had chained +his tongue as he beheld her; but now, with eager yet respectful +tenderness, he inquired after her health, and how she had borne their +long journey, and other questions, trifling in themselves, but uttered +in a tone that thrilled the young heart of her he addressed. + +Herbert knew not how intimately the image of Mary Greville had mingled +with his most secret thoughts, even in his moments of grave study and +earnest application, until he heard she was about to leave England. +Sorrow, disappointment, scarcely defined but bitterly painful, then +occupied his mind, and the knowledge burst with dazzling clearness on +his heart that he loved her; so deeply, so devotedly, that even were +every other wish fulfilled, life, without her, would be a blank. He had +deemed himself so lifted above all earthly feelings, that even were he +to be deprived as Mr. Morton of every natural relation, he could in time +reconcile himself to the will of his Maker, and in the discharge of +ministerial duties be happy. He had fancied his heart was full of the +love of God alone, blessed in that, however changed his earthly lot. +Suddenly he was awakened from his illusion: now in the hour of +separation he knew an earthly idol; he discovered that he was not so +completely the servant of his Maker as he had hoped, and sometimes +believed. But in the doubts and fears which shadowed his exalted mind, +he sought the footstool of his God. His cry for assistance was not +unheeded. Peace and comfort rested on his heart. A cloud was lifted +from his eyes, and for the knowledge of his virtuous love he blessed his +God; feeling thus supported he could guide and control himself according +to the dictates of piety. He knew well the character of Mary; he felt +assured that, if in after years he were permitted to make her his own, +she would indeed become his helpmate in all things, more particularly in +those which related to his God and to his holy duties among men. He +thought on the sympathy that existed between them--he remembered the +lighting up of that soft, dark eye, the flushing cheek, the smile of +pleasure that ever welcomed him, and fondly his heart whispered that he +need not doubt her love. Three years, or nearly four must elapse ere he +could feel at liberty to marry; not till he beheld himself a minister of +God. Yet interminable as to his imagination the intervening years +appeared, still there was no trembling in his trusting heart. If his +Father on high ordained them for each other, it mattered not how long +the time that must elapse, and if for some wise purpose his wishes were +delayed, he recognised the hand of God, and saw "that it was good." + +Yet Herbert could not resist the impulse to behold Mary once more ere +she quitted England to explain to her his feelings; to understand each +other. He knew the day his father intended going to Dover, and the +evening previous, much to the astonishment of his family, made his +appearance amongst them. All expressed pleasure at his intention but +one, and that one understood not why; but when she heard the cause of +his unexpected visit, a sudden and indefinable pang shot through her +young heart, dimming at once the joy with which the sight of him had +filled it. She knew not, guessed not why, when she laid her head on her +pillow that night, she wept so bitterly. The source of those secret and +silent tears she could not trace, she only knew their cause was one of +sorrow, and yet she loved Mary. + +The pleading earnestness of Emmeline had, after some little difficulty, +obtained the consent of her mother to her accompanying her father and +brother, on condition, however, of her not agitating Mary by any +unconstrained display of sorrow. It was only at their first meeting this +condition had been forgotten. Mary looked so pale, so thin, so different +even to when they parted, that the warm heart of Emmeline could not be +restrained, for she knew, however resignation might be, nay, was felt, +it was a bitter pang to that gentle girl to leave her native land, and +the friends she so much loved; but recalling her promise, with a strong +effort she checked her own sorrow, and endeavoured with playful fondness +to raise the spirits of her friend. + +The day passed cheerfully, the young people took a drive for some few +miles in the vicinity of Dover, while Mr. Hamilton, acting the part of a +brother to the favourite _protégeé_ of his much-loved mother, listened +to her plans, counselled and improved them, and, indeed, on many points +proved himself such a true friend, that when Mrs. Greville retired to +rest that night, she felt more at ease in mind than for many months she +had been. + +The following day was employed in seeing the antiquities of Dover, its +ancient castle among the first, and with Mr. Hamilton as a cicerone, it +was a day of pleasure to all, though, perhaps, a degree of melancholy +might have pervaded the party in the evening, for the recollection would +come, that by noon on the morrow, Mrs. Greville and Mary would bid them +farewell. In vain during that day had Herbert sought for an opportunity +to speak with Mary on the subject nearest his heart, though they had +been so happy together; when for a few minutes they found themselves +alone, he had fancied there was more than usual reserve in Mary's +manner, which checked the words upon his lip. Some hours he lay awake +that night. Should he write his hopes and wishes? No: he would hear the +answer from her own lips, and the next morning an opportunity appeared +to present itself. + +The vessel did not leave Dover till an hour before noon, and breakfast +having been despatched by half-past nine, Mrs. Greville persuaded her +daughter to take a gentle walk in the intervening time. Herbert +instantly offered to escort her. Emmeline remained to assist Mrs. +Greville in some travelling arrangements, and Mr. Hamilton employed +himself in some of those numberless little offices which active men take +upon themselves in the business of a departure. Mary shrunk with such +evident reluctance from this arrangement, that for the first time +Herbert doubted. + +"You were not wont to shrink thus from accepting me as your companion," +he said, fixing his large expressive eyes mournfully upon her, and +speaking in a tone of such melancholy sweetness, that Mary hastily +struggled to conceal the tear that started to her eye. "Are our happy +days of childhood indeed thus forgotten?" he continued, gently. "Go with +me, dear Mary; let us in fancy transport ourselves at least for one +hour back to those happy years of early life which will not come again." + +The thoughts, the hopes, the joys of her childhood flashed with sudden +power through the heart of Mary as he spoke, and she resisted them not. + +"Forgive me, Herbert," she said, hastily rising to prepare; "I have +become a strange and wayward being the last few months; you must bear +with me, for the sake of former days." + +Playfully he granted the desired forgiveness, and they departed on their +walk. For some little time they walked in silence. Before they were +aware of it, a gentle ascent conducted them to a spot, not only lovely +in its own richness, but in the extensive view that stretched beneath +them. The wide ocean lay slumbering at their feet; the brilliant rays of +the sun, which it reflected as a mirror, appeared to lull it to rest, +the very waves broke softly on the shore. To the left extended the +snow-white cliffs, throwing in shadow part of the ocean, and bringing +forward their own illumined walls in bold relief against the dark blue +sea. Ships of every size, from the floating castle in the offing to the +tiny pleasure boat, whose white sails shining in the sun caused her to +be distinguished at some distance, skimming along the ocean as a bird of +snowy plumage across the heavens, the merchant vessels, the packets +entering and departing, even the blackened colliers, added interest to +the scene; for at the distance Herbert and Mary stood, no confusion was +heard to disturb the moving picture. On their right the beautiful +country peculiar to Kent spread out before them in graceful undulations +of hill and valley, hop-ground and meadow, wherein the sweet fragrance +of the newly-mown grass was wafted at intervals to the spot where they +stood. Wild flowers of various kinds were around them; the hawthorn +appearing like a tree of snow in the centre of a dark green hedge; the +modest primrose and the hidden violet yet lingered, as if loth to +depart, though their brethren of the summer had already put forth their +budding blossoms. A newly-severed trunk of an aged tree invited them to +sit and rest, and the most tasteful art could not have placed a rustic +seat in a more lovely scene. + +Long and painfully did Mary gaze around her, as if she would engrave +within her heart every scene of the land she was so soon to leave. + +"Herbert," she said, at length, "I never wished to gaze on futurity +before, but now, oh, I would give much to know if indeed I shall ever +gaze on these scenes again. Could I but think I might return to them, +the pang of leaving would lose one half its bitterness. I know this is a +weak and perhaps sinful feeling; but in vain I have lately striven to +bow resignedly to my Maker's will, even should His call meet me, as I +sometimes fear it will, in a foreign land, apart from all, save one, +whom I love on earth." + +"Do not, do not think so, dearest Mary. True, indeed, there is no +parting without its fears, even for a week, a day, an hour. Death ever +hovers near us, to descend when least expected. But oh, for my sake, +Mary, dear Mary, talk not of dying in a foreign land. God's will is +best, His decree is love; I know, I feel it, and on this subject from +our infancy we have felt alike; to you alone have I felt that I dared +breathe the holy aspirations sometimes my own. I am not wont to be +sanguine, but somewhat whispers within me you will return--these scenes +behold again." + +Mary gazed on her young companion, he had spoken with unwonted +animation, and his mild eye rested with trusting fondness upon her; she +dared not meet it; her pale cheek suddenly became crimson, but with an +effort she replied-- + +"Buoy me not up with vain hopes, Herbert; it is better, perhaps, that I +should never look to my return, for hope might descend to vain wishes, +and wishes to repinings, which must not be. I shall look on other scenes +of loveliness, and though in them perhaps no fond association of earth +may be mingled, yet there is one of which no change of country can +deprive me, one association that from scenes as these can never never +fly. The friends of my youth will be no longer near me, strangers alone +will surround me; but even as the hand of my Heavenly Father is marked +in every scene, however far apart, so is that hand, that love extended +to me wherever I may dwell. Oh, that my heart may indeed be filled with +the love of Him." + +There was a brief silence. The countenance of Herbert had been for a +moment troubled, but after a few seconds resumed its serenity, +heightened by the fervid feelings of his heart. + +"Mary," he said, taking her passive hand in his, "if I am too bold in +speaking all I wish, forgive me. You know not how I have longed for one +moment of unchecked confidence before you left England, it is now before +me, and, oh, listen to me, dearest Mary, with that kindness you have +ever shown. I need not remind you of our days of childhood and early +youth; I need not recall the mutual sympathy which, in every feeling, +hope, joy, or sorrow, has been our own. We have grown together, played +together in infancy; read, thought, and often in secret prayed together +in youth. To you I have ever imparted my heartfelt wishes, earnest +prayers for my future life, to become a worthy servant of my God, and +lead others in his path, and yet, frail mortal as I am, I feel, even if +these wishes are fulfilled, there will yet, dearest Mary, remain a void +within my heart. May I, may I, indeed, behold in the playmate of my +infancy a friend in manhood, the partner of my life--my own Mary as my +assistant in labours of love? I am agitating you, dearest girl, forgive +me; only give me some little hope. Years must elapse ere that blessed +moment can arrive, perhaps I have been wrong to urge it now, but I could +not part from you without one word to explain my feelings, to implore +your ever-granted sympathy." + +The hand of Mary trembled in his grasp. She had turned from his pleading +glance, but when he ceased, she raised her head and struggled to speak. +A smile, beautiful, holy in its beauty, appeared struggling with tears, +and a faint flush had risen to her cheek, but voice she had none, and +for one moment she concealed her face on his shoulder. She withdrew not +her hand from his, and Herbert felt--oh, how gratefully--that his love +was returned; he had not hoped in vain. For some minutes they could not +speak, every feeling was in common; together they had grown, together +loved, and now that the magic word had been spoken, what need was there +for reserve? none; and reserve was banished. No darkening clouds were +then perceived; at that moment Mary thought not of her father, and if +she did, could she believe that his consent to an union with a son of +Mr. Hamilton would be difficult to obtain. Marry they could not yet, and +perhaps the unalloyed bliss of that hour might have originated in the +fact that they thought only of the present--the blessed knowledge that +they loved each other, were mutually beloved. + +The happiness glowing on Mary's expressive countenance as she entered +could not fail to attract the watchful eye of her mother, and almost +unconsciously, and certainly indefinably, her own bosom reflected the +pleasure of her child, and the pang of quitting England was partially +eased of its bitterness. Yet still it was a sorrowful moment when the +time of separation actually came. Their friends had gone on board with +them, and remained till the signal for departure was given. Mary had +preferred the cabin to the confusion on deck, and there her friends left +her. In the sorrow of that moment Emmeline's promise of composure was +again forgotten; she clung weeping to Mary's neck, till her father, with +gentle persuasion, drew her away, and almost carried her on deck. +Herbert yet lingered; they were alone in the cabin, the confusion +attendant on a departure preventing all fear of intruders. He clasped +Mary to his heart, in one long passionate embrace, then hastily placing +the trembling girl in the arms of her mother, he murmured almost +inaudibly-- + +"Mrs. Greville, dearest Mrs. Greville, guard, oh, guard her for me, she +will be mine; she will return to bless me, when I may claim and can +cherish her as my wife. Talk to her of me; let not the name of Herbert +be prohibited between you. I must not stay, yet one word more, Mrs. +Greville--say, oh, say you will not refuse me as your son, if three +years hence Mary will still be mine. Say your blessing will hallow our +union; and oh, I feel it will then indeed be blessed!" + +Overpowered with sudden surprise and unexpected joy, Mrs. Greville gazed +for a moment speechlessly on the noble youth before her, and vainly the +mother struggled to speak at this confirmation of her long-cherished +hopes and wishes. + +"Mother," murmured Mary, alarmed at her silence, and burying her face in +her bosom, "mother, will you not speak, will you not bid us hope?" + +"God in Heaven bless you, my children!" she at length exclaimed, +bursting into tears of heartfelt gratitude and joy. "It was joy, joy," +she repeated, struggling for composure; "I expected not this blessing. +Yes, Herbert, we will speak of you, think of you, doubt us not, my son, +my dear son. A mother's protecting care and soothing love will guard +your Mary. She is not only her mother's treasure now. Go, my beloved +Herbert, you are summoned; farewell, and God bless you!" + +Herbert did not linger with his father and sister; a few minutes private +interview with the former caused his most sanguine hopes to become yet +stronger, then travelling post to London, where he only remained a few +hours, returned with all haste to his college. In his rapid journey, +however, he had changed his mind with regard to keeping what had passed +between himself and Mary a secret from his mother, whom he yet loved +with perhaps even more confiding fondness than in his boyhood. He saw +her alone; imparted to her briefly but earnestly all that had passed, +implored her to promise consent, and preserve his confidence even from +his brothers and sisters; as so long a time must elapse ere they could +indeed be united, that he dreaded their engagement being known. + +"Even the good wishes of the dear members of home," he said, "would +sound, I fear, but harshly on my ear. I cannot define why I do not wish +it known even to those I love; yet, dearest mother, indulge me. The +events of one day are hidden from us; how dark then must be those of +three years. No plighted promise has passed between us; it is but the +confidence of mutual love; and that--oh, mother, I could not bear it +torn from the recesses of my own breast to be a subject of conversation +even to those dearest to me." + +His mother looked on the glowing countenance of her son; on him, who +from, his birth had never by his conduct given her one single moment of +care, and had she even disapproved of his secrecy, all he asked would +have been granted him; but she approved of his resolution, and emotion +glistened in her eye, as she said-- + +"My Herbert, if I had been privileged to select one among my young +friends to be your wife, my choice would have fallen, without one +moment's hesitation, on Mary Greville. She, amid them all, I deem most +worthy to be the partner of my son. May Heaven in mercy spare you to +each other!" + +Herbert returned to college, and resumed his studies with even greater +earnestness than, before. His unrestrained confidence had been as balm +to his mother's heart, and soothed the bitter pain it was to behold, to +feel assured, for it was no longer fancy, that the confidence of +Caroline was indeed utterly denied her and bestowed upon another. Yet +still Mrs. Hamilton fancied Caroline loved St. Eval; her eyes had not +yet been opened to the enormity of her daughter's conduct. Nor were they +till, after a long struggle of fervid love with the tremblings natural +to a fond but reserved and lowly heart, St. Eval summoned courage to +offer hand, heart, and fortune to the girl he loved (he might well be +pardoned for the belief that she loved him), and was rejected, coldly, +decidedly. + +The young Earl had received the glad sanction of Mr. Hamilton to make +his proposals to his daughter. There had never been, nor was there now, +anything to damp his hopes. He was not, could not be deceived in the +belief that Caroline accepted, nay, demanded, encouraged his attention. +Invariably kind, almost fascinating in her manner, she had ever singled +him out from the midst of many much gayer and more attractive young men. +She had given him somewhat more to love each time they parted; and what +could this mean, but that she cared for him more than for others? Again +and again St. Eval pondered on the encouragement he could not doubt but +that he received; again and again demanded of himself if he were not +playing with her feelings thus to defer his proposals. Surely she loved +him. The sanction of her parents had heightened his hopes, and love and +confidence in the truth, the purity of his beloved one obtained so much +ascendancy over his heart, that when the important words were said, he +had almost ceased to fear. How bitter, how agonizing then must have been +his disappointment when he was refused--when sudden haughtiness beamed +on Caroline's noble brow, and coldness spread over every feature. And +yet, could he doubt it? No; triumph was glittering in her sparkling eye; +in vain he looked for sympathy in his disappointment, if love were +denied him. He gazed on her, and the truth suddenly flashed on his mind; +he marked the triumph with which she heard his offer; no softening +emotion was in her countenance. In vain he tried to ascribe its +expression to some other feeling; it was triumph, he could not be +deceived; and with agony St. Eval discovered that the being he had +almost worshipped was not the faultless creature he had believed her; +she had played with his feelings; she had encouraged him, heightened his +love, merely to afford herself amusement. The visions of hope, of fancy +were rudely dispelled, and perhaps at that moment it was better for his +peace that he suddenly felt she was beneath his love; she was not worthy +to be his wife. He no longer esteemed; and if love itself were not +utterly snapped asunder, the loss of esteem enabled him to act in that +interview with pride approaching to her own. He reproached her not: no +word did he utter that could prove how deeply he was wounded, and thus +add to the triumph so plain to be perceived. That she had sunk in his +estimation she might have seen, but other feelings prevented her +discovering how deeply. Had she veiled her manner more, had she rejected +him with kindness, St. Eval might still have loved, and imagined that +friendship and esteem had actuated her conduct towards him. Yet those +haughty features expelled this thought as soon as it arose. It was on +the night of a gay assembly St. Eval had found an opportunity to speak +with Caroline, and when both rejoined the gay crowd no emotion was +discernible in the countenance of either. St. Eval was the same to all +as usual. No one who might have heard his eloquent discussion on some +state affairs with the Russian consul could have imagined how painfully +acute were his sufferings; it was not only disappointed love--no, his +was aggravated bitterness; he could no longer esteem the object of his +love, he had found himself deceived, cruelly deceived, in one he had +looked on almost as faultless; and where is the pang that can equal one +like this? The heightened colour on Caroline's cheek, the increased +brilliancy of her eye, attracted the admiration of all around her, the +triumph of power had indeed been achieved. But when she laid her head on +her pillow, when the silence and darkness of night brought the past to +her mind more vividly, in vain she sought forgetfulness in sleep. Was it +happiness, triumph, that bade her bury her face in her hands and weep, +weep till almost every limb became convulsed by her overpowering +emotion? Her thoughts were undefined, but so painful, that she was +glad--how glad when morning came. She compared her present with her +former self, and the contrast was misery; but even as her ill-fated aunt +had done, she summoned pride to stifle every feeding of remorse. + +Mr. Hamilton had given his sanction to the addresses of Lord St. Eval to +his daughter; but he knew not when, the young man intended to place the +seal upon his fate. Great then was his astonishment, the morning +following the evening we have mentioned, when St. Eval called to bid him +farewell, as he intended, he said, leaving London that afternoon for his +father's seat, where he should remain perhaps a week, and then quit +England for the Continent. He spoke calmly, but there was a paleness of +the cheek, a dimness of the eye, that told a tale of inward +wretchedness, which the regard of Mr. Hamilton could not fail instantly +to discover. Deeply had he become interested in the young man, and the +quick instinct combined with the fears of a father, told him that the +conduct of Caroline had caused this change. He looked at the expressive +countenance of the young Earl for a few minutes, then placing his hand +on his shoulder, said kindly, but impressively-- + +"St. Eval, you are changed, as well as your plans. You are unhappy. What +has happened? Have your too sensitive feelings caused you to fancy +Caroline unkind?" + +"Would to heaven it were only fancy!" replied St. Eval, with unwonted +emotion, and almost convulsively clenching both hands as if for +calmness, added more composedly, "I have been too presumptuous in my +hopes; I fancied myself beloved by your beautiful daughter, but I have +found myself painfully mistaken." + +Sternness gathered on the brow of the father as he heard, and he +answered, with painful emphasis-- + +"St. Eval, deceive me not, I charge you. In what position do you now +stand with Caroline?" + +"Briefly, then, if I must speak, in the humble character of a rejected, +scornfully rejected lover." His feelings carried him beyond control. The +triumph he had seen glittering so brightly in the eyes of Caroline had +for the time turned every emotion into gall. He shrunk from the agony it +was to find he was deceived in one whom he had believed so perfect. + +"Scorn! has a daughter of mine acted thus? Encourage, and then scorn. +St. Eval, for pity's sake, tell me! you are jesting; it is not of +Caroline you speak." So spoke the now agonized father, for every hope of +his child's singleness of mind and purity of intention appeared at once +blighted. He grasped St. Eval's hand, and looked on him with eyes from +which, in the deep disappointment of his heart, all sternness had fled. + +"I grieve to cause you pain, my dear friend," replied the young Earl, +entering at once into the father's feelings, "but it is even so. Your +daughter has only acted as many, nay, as the majority of her sex are +fond of doing. It appears that you, too, have marked what might be +termed the encouragement she gave me. My self-love is soothed, for I +might otherwise have deemed my hopes were built on the unstable +foundation of folly and presumption." + +"And condemnation of my child is the fruit of your self-acquittal, St. +Eval, is it not? You despise her now as much as you have loved her," and +Mr. Hamilton paced the room with agitation. + +"Would almost that I could!" exclaimed St. Eval; the young Earl then +added, despondingly, "no, I deny not that your child has sunk in my +estimation; I believed her exalted far above the majority of her sex; +that she, apparently all softness and truth, was incapable of playing +with the most sacred feelings of a fellow-creature. I looked on her as +faultless; and though the veil has fallen from my eyes, it tells me that +if in Caroline Hamilton I am deceived, it is useless to look for +perfection upon earth. Yet I cannot tear her image from my heart. She +has planted misery there which I cannot at present overcome; but if that +triumph yields her pleasure, and tends to her happiness, be it so; my +farther attention shall no longer annoy her." + +Much disturbed, Mr. Hamilton continued to pace the room, then hastily +approaching the young Earl, he said, hurriedly-- + +"Forget her, St. Eval, forget her; rest not till you have regained your +peace. My disappointment, that of her mother--our long-cherished hopes, +but it is useless to speak of them, to bring them forward, bitter as +they are, in comparison with yours. Forget her, St. Eval; she is +unworthy of you," and he wrung his hand again and again, as if in that +pressure he could conquer and conceal his feelings. At that instant +Emmeline bounded joyfully into the room, unconscious that any one was +with her father, and only longing to tell him the delightful news that +she had received a long, long letter from Mary, telling her of their +safe arrival at Geneva, at which place Mrs. Greville intended to remain +for a few weeks, before she proceeded more southward. + +"Look, dear papa, is not this worth receiving?" she exclaimed, holding +up the well-filled letter, and looking the personification of innocent +and radiant happiness, her fair luxuriant hair pushed in disorder from +her open forehead and flushed cheek, her blue eyes sparkling with +irresistible glee, which was greatly heightened by her glowing smiles. +It was impossible to look on Emmeline without feeling every ruffled +emotion suddenly calmed; she was so bright, so innocent, so fair a +thing, that if peace and kindness had wished to take up their abode on +earth, they could not have found a fairer form wherein to dwell. As St. +Eval gazed upon the animated girl, he could not help contrasting her +innocent and light-hearted pleasure with his own unmitigated sorrow. + +"Your presence and your joy are mistimed, my dear Emmeline; your father +appears engaged," said Mrs. Hamilton, entering almost directly after her +child, and perceiving by one glance at her husband's face that +something had chanced to disturb him. "Control these wild spirits for a +time till he is able to listen to you." + +"Do not check her, my dear Emmeline, I am not particularly engaged. If +St. Eval will forgive me, I would gladly hear some news of our dear +Mary." + +"And pray let me hear it also. You know how interested I am in this dear +friend of yours, Emmeline," replied St. Eval, struggling with himself, +and succeeding sufficiently to speak playfully; for he and Emmeline had +contrived to become such great allies and intimate friends, that by some +sympathy titles of ceremony were seldom used between them, and they were +Eugene and Emmeline to each other, as if they were indeed brother and +sister. + +Laughingly and delightedly Emmeline imparted the contents of her letter, +which afforded real pleasure both to Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, by the more +cheerful, even happier style in which she had written. + +"Now do you not think I ought to be proud of my friend, Master Eugene? +is she not one worth having?" demanded Emmeline, sportively appealing to +the young Earl, as she read to her father some of Mary's affectionate +expressions and wishes in the conclusion. + +"So much so, that I am seized with an uncontrollable desire to know her, +and if you will only give me a letter of introduction, I will set off +for Geneva next week." + +Emmeline raised her laughing eyes to his face, with an expression of +unfeigned amazement. + +"A most probable circumstance," she said, laughing; "no, Lord St. Eval, +you will not impose thus on my credulity. Eugene St. Eval, the most +courted, flattered, and distinguished, leave London before the season +is over--impossible." + +"I thank you for the pretty compliments you are showering on me, my +little fairy friend, but it is nevertheless true. I leave England for +the Continent next week, and I may as well bend my wandering steps to +Geneva as elsewhere." + +"But what can you possibly be going on the Continent again for? I am +sure, by all the anecdotes you have told me, you must have seen all that +is worth seeing, and so why should poor England again be deserted by one +of the ablest of her sons?" + +"Emmeline!" exclaimed her mother, in an accent of warning and reproach, +which brought a deep crimson flush to her cheek, and caused her eyes to +glisten, for Mrs. Hamilton had marked that all was not serene on the +countenance of the Earl, and her heart beat with anxious alarm; for she +knew his intentions with regard to Caroline, and all she beheld and +heard, startled, almost terrified her. Lord St. Eval certainly looked a +little disturbed at Emmeline's continued questions, and perceiving it, +she hesitatingly but frankly said-- + +"I really beg your pardon, my lord, for my unjustifiable curiosity; +mamma is always reproving me for it, and certainly I deserve her lecture +now. But will you really find out Mary, and be the bearer of a small +parcel for me?" + +"With the greatest pleasure; for it will give me an object, which I had +not before, and a most pleasing one, if I may hope your friend will not +object to my intrusion." + +"A friend of mine will ever be warmly welcomed by Mary," said Emmeline, +with eagerness, but checking herself. + +"Then may I hope you will continue to regard me as your friend, and +still speak of me as Eugene, though perhaps a year or more may pass +before you see me again?" demanded the young Earl, somewhat sadly, +glancing towards Mrs. Hamilton, as if for her approval. + +"As my brother Eugene--yes," answered Emmeline, quickly, and perhaps +archly. A shadow passed over his brow. + +"As your _friend_" he repeated, laying an emphasis on the word, which to +any one less innocent of the world than Emmeline, would at once have +excited their suspicion, and which single word at once told Mrs. +Hamilton that all her cherished hopes were blighted. She read +confirmation in her husband's countenance, and for a few minutes stood +bewildered. + +"I leave town in a few hours for my father's seat," added St. Eval, +turning to Mrs. Hamilton. "I may amuse myself by taking Devonshire in my +way, or rather going out of my way for that purpose. Have you any +commands at Oakwood that I can perform?" + +Mrs. Hamilton answered thankfully in the negative, but Emmeline +exclaimed-- + +"I have a good mind to make you bearer of a letter and a _gage d'amour_ +to my good old nurse; she will be so delighted to hear of me, and her +postman a nobleman. Poor nurse will have food for conversation and +pleasurable reflection till we return." + +"Anything you like, only make me of use; and let me have it in an hour's +time, or perhaps I can give you two." + +"One will be all-sufficient; but what a wonderful desire to be useful +has seized you all in a minute," replied Emmeline, whose high spirits +appeared on that day utterly uncontrollable, and she ran on unmindful of +her mother's glance. "But if I really do this, I must bid you farewell +at once, or I shall have no time. Think of me, if anything extraordinary +meets your eye, or occurs to you, and treasure it up for my information, +as you know my taste for the marvellous. My letter to Mary shall be +forwarded to you, for I really depend on your seeking her, and telling +her all about us; and now, then, with every wish for your pleasant +journey, I must wish you good-bye." + +"Good-bye, dear, happy Emmeline," he said, with earnestness. "May you be +as light-hearted and joyous, and as kind, when we meet again as now; may +I commission you with my warmest remembrances and kind adieus to your +cousin, whom I am sorry I have not chanced to see this morning?" + +"They shall be duly delivered," answered Emmeline, and kissing her hand +gaily in adieu, she tripped lightly out of the room, and St. Eval +instantly turned towards Mrs. Hamilton. + +"In this intention of leaving England for a few months, or perhaps a +year," he said, striving for calmness, but speaking in a tone of +sadness, "you will at once perceive that my cherished hopes for the +future are blighted. I will not linger on the subject, for I cannot yet +bear disappointment such as this with composure. Were I of different +mould, I might, spite of coldness and pride, continue my addresses; and +were you as other parents are, Caroline--Miss Hamilton might still be +mine; a fashionable marriage it would still be, but, thank God, such +will not be; even to bestow your child on one you might value more than +me, you would not trample on her affections, you would not consent that +she should be an unwilling bride, and I--oh! I could not--could not wed +with one who loved me not. My dream of happiness has ended--been +painfully dispelled; the blow was unexpected, and has found me +unprepared. I leave England, lest my ungoverned feelings should lead me +wrong. Mrs. Hamilton," he continued, more vehemently, "you understand my +peculiar feelings, and can well guess the tortures I am now enduring. +You know why I am reserved, because I dread the outbreak of emotion even +in the most trifling circumstances. Oh, to have been your son--" he +paused abruptly, and hurriedly paced the room. "Forgive me," he said, +more calmly. "Only say you approve of my resolution to seek change for a +short time, till I obtain self-government, and can behold her without +pain; say that I am doing right for myself. I cannot think." + +"You are right, quite right," replied Mrs. Hamilton instantly, and her +husband confirmed her words. "I do approve your resolution, though +deeply, most deeply, I regret its cause, St. Eval. Your disappointment +is most bitter, but you grieve not alone. To have given Caroline to you, +to behold her your wife, would have fulfilled every fervent wish of +which she is the object. Not you alone have been deceived; her conduct +has been such as to mislead those who have known her from childhood. St. +Eval, she is not worthy of you." + +Disappointed, not only at the blighting of every secret hope, not those +alone in which St. Eval was concerned, but every fond thought she had +indulged in the purity and integrity of her child, in which, though her +confidence had been given to another, she had still implicitly trusted, +the most bitter disappointment and natural displeasure filled that +mother's heart, and almost for the first time since their union Mr. +Hamilton could read this unwonted emotion, in one usually so gentle, in +her kindling eyes and agitated voice. + +"Child of my heart, my hopes, my care, as she is, I must yet speak it, +forget her, Eugene; let not the thought of a deceiver, a coquette, debar +you from the possession of that peace which should ever be the portion +of one so truly honourable, so wholly estimable as yourself. You are +disappointed, pained; but you know not--cannot guess the agony it is to +find the integrity in which I so fondly trusted is as naught; that my +child, my own child, whom I had hoped to lead through life without a +stain, is capable of such conduct." + +Emotion choked her voice. She had been carried on by the violence of her +feelings, and perhaps said more in that moment of excitement than she +either wished or intended. + +St. Eval gazed on the noble woman before him with unfeigned admiration. +He saw the indignation, the displeasure which she felt; it heightened +the dignity of her character in his estimation; but he now began to +tremble for its effects upon her child. + +"Do not, my dear Mrs. Hamilton," he said, with some hesitation, "permit +Miss Hamilton's rejection of me to excite your displeasure towards her. +If with me she could not be happy, she was right to refuse my hand. Let +me not have the misery of feeling I have caused dissension in a family +whose beautiful unity has ever bound me to it. Surely you would not urge +the affections of your child." + +"Never," replied Mrs. Hamilton, earnestly. "I understand your fears, +but let them pass away. I shall urge nothing, but my duty I must do. +Much as I admire the exalted sentiments you express, I must equally +deplore the mistaken conduct of my child. She has wilfully sported with +the most sacred of human feelings. Once more I say, she is not worthy to +be yours." + +The indignation and strong emotion still lingering in her voice +convinced St. Eval that he might urge no more. Respectfully he took his +leave. + + + + +CHAPTER V. + + +Mrs. Hamilton sat silently revolving in her mind all Caroline's late +conduct, but vainly endeavouring to discover one single good reason to +justify her rejection of St. Eval. In vain striving to believe all must +have been mistaken, she had not given him encouragement. That her +affections could have become secretly engaged was a thing so unlikely, +that even when Mrs. Hamilton suggested it, both she and her husband +banished the idea as impossible; for St. Eval alone had she evinced any +marked preference. + +"You must speak to her, Emmeline, I dare not; for I feel too angry and +disappointed to argue calmly. She has deceived us; all your cares appear +to have been of no avail; all the watchful tenderness with which she had +been treated thus returned! I could have forgiven it, I would not have +said another word, if she had conducted herself towards him with +propriety; but to give him encouragement, such as all who have seen them +together must have remarked; to attract him by every winning art, to +chain him to her side, and then reject him with scorn. What could have +caused her conduct, but the wish to display her power, her triumph over +one so superior? Well might he say she had sunk in his estimation. Why +did we not question her, instead of thus fondly trusting in her +integrity? Emmeline, we have trusted our child too confidently, and thus +our reliance is rewarded." + +Seldom, if ever, had Mrs. Hamilton seen her husband so disturbed; for +some little time she remained with him, and succeeded partly in soothing +his natural displeasure. She then left him to compose her own troubled +and disappointed feelings ere she desired the presence of her child. +Meanwhile, as the happy Emmeline went to prepare her little packet for +her dear old nurse, the thought suddenly arose that St. Eval had sent +his remembrances and adieus to Ellen only, he had not mentioned +Caroline; and unsophisticated as she was, this struck her as something +very strange, and she was not long in connecting this circumstance with +his sudden departure. Wild, sportive, and innocent as Emmeline was, she +yet possessed a depth of reflection and clearness of perception, which +those who only knew her casually might not have expected. She had marked +with extreme pleasure that which she believed the mutual attachment of +St. Eval and her sister; and with her ready fancy ever at work, had +indulged very often in airy visions, in which she beheld Caroline +Countess St. Eval, and mistress of that beautiful estate in Cornwall, +which she had heard Mrs. Hamilton say had been presented by the Marquis +of Malvern to his son on his twenty-first birthday. Emmeline had +indulged these fancies, and noticed the conduct of Caroline and St. +Eval till she really believed their union would take place. She had been +so delighted at the receipt of Mary's letter, that she had no time to +remember the young Earl's departure; but when she was alone, that truth +suddenly flashed across her mind, and another strange incident, though +at the time she had not remarked it, when she had said as her brother +she would remember him, he had repeated, with startling emphasis, "as +her _friend_." "What could it all mean?" she thought. "Caroline cannot +have rejected him? No, that is quite impossible. My sister would surely +not be such a practised coquette. I must seek her and have the mystery +solved. Surely she will be sorry St. Eval leaves us so soon." + +Emmeline hastened first to Ellen, begging her to pack up the little +packet for Mrs. Langford, for she knew such an opportunity would be as +acceptable to her cousin as to herself; for Ellen never forgot the +humble kindness and prompt attention she had received from the widow +during her long and tedious illness; and by little offerings, and what +the good woman still more valued, by a few kind and playful lines, which +ever accompanied them, she endeavoured to prove her sense of Widow +Langford's conduct. + +In five minutes more Emmeline was in her sister's room. Caroline was +partly dressed as if for a morning drive, and her attendant leaving just +as her sister entered. She looked pale and more fatigued than usual, +from the gaiety of the preceding night. Happy she certainly did not +look, and forgetting in that sight the indignation which the very +supposition of coquetry in her sister had excited, Emmeline gently +approached her, and kissing her cheek, said fondly-- + +"What is the matter, dear Caroline? You look ill, wearied, and even +melancholy. Did you dance more than usual last night?" + +"No," replied Caroline; "I believe not. I do not think I am more tired +than usual. But what do you come for, Emmeline? Some reason must bring +you here, for you are generally hard at work at this time of the day." + +"My wits have been so disturbed by Mary's letter, that I have been +unable to settle to anything," replied her sister, laughing; "and to add +to their disturbance, I have just heard something so strange, that I +could not resist coming to tell you." + +"Of what nature?" + +"St. Eval leaves London to-day for Castle Malvern, and next week quits +England. Now is not that extraordinary?" + +Caroline became suddenly flushed with crimson, which quickly receding, +left her even paler than before. + +"She is innocent," thought Emmeline. "She loves him. St. Eval must have +behaved ill to her; and yet he certainly looked more sinned against than +sinning." + +"To-day: does he leave to-day?" Caroline said, at length, speaking, it +appeared, with effort, and turning to avoid her sister's glance. + +"In little more than an hour's time; but I am sorry I told you, dear +Caroline, if the news has pained you." + +"Pained me," repeated her sister, with returning haughtiness; "what can +you mean, Emmeline? Lord St. Eval is nothing to me." + +"Nothing!" repeated the astonished girl. "Caroline, you are +incomprehensible. Why did you treat him with such marked attention if +you cared nothing for him?" + +"For a very simple reason; because it gave me pleasure to prove that it +was in my power to do that for which other girls have tried in +vain--compel the proud lordly St. Eval to bow to a woman's will." Pride +had returned again. She felt the pleasure of triumphant power, and her +eyes sparkled and her cheek again flushed, but with a different emotion +to that she had felt before. + +"Do you mean, then, that you have never loved him, and merely sported +with his feelings, for your own amusement? Caroline, I will not believe +it. You could not have acted with such cruelty; you do love him, but you +reject my confidence. I do not ask you to confide in me, though I did +hope I should have been your chosen friend; but I beseech, I implore +you, Caroline, only to say that you are jesting. You do love him." + +"You are mistaken, Emmeline, never more so in your life. I have refused +his offered hand; if you wish my confidence on this subject, I give it +you. As he is a favourite of yours, I do not doubt your preserving his +secret inviolate. I might have been Countess of St. Eval, but my end was +accomplished, and I dismissed my devoted cavalier." + +"And can you, dare you jest on such a subject?" exclaimed Emmeline, +indignantly. "Is it possible you can have wilfully acted thus? sported +with the feelings of such a man as St. Eval, laughed at his pain, called +forth his love to gratify your desire of power? Caroline, shame on you!" + +"I am not in the habit of being schooled as to right and wrong by a +younger sister, nor will I put up with it now, Emmeline. I never +interfere with your conduct, and therefore you will, if you please, do +the same with me. I am not responsible to you for my actions, nor shall +I ever be," replied Caroline, with cold yet angry pride. + +"But I will speak, when I know you have acted contrary to those +principles mamma has ever endeavoured to instill into us both," replied +Emmeline, still indignantly; "and you are and have been ever welcome to +remonstrate with me. I am not so weak as I once was, fearful to speak my +sentiments even when I knew them to be right. You have acted shamefully, +cruelly, Caroline, and I will tell you what I think, angry as it may +make you." + +A haughty and contemptuous answer rose to Caroline's lips, but she was +prevented giving it utterance by the entrance of Martyn, her mother's +maid, with her lady's commands that Miss Hamilton should attend her in +the boudoir. + +"How provoking!" she exclaimed. "I expect Annie to call for me every +minute, and mamma will perhaps detain me half an hour;" and most +unwillingly she obeyed the summons. + +"Annie," repeated Emmeline, when her sister had left the room, +"Annie--this is her work; if my sister had not been thus intimate with +her she never would have acted in this manner." And so disturbed was the +gentle girl at this confirmation of her fears, that it was some little +time before she could recover sufficient serenity to rejoin Ellen in +arranging the widow's packet. + +Mrs. Langford had the charge of Oakwood during the absence of the +family, and Mrs. Hamilton, recollecting some affairs concerning the +village schools she wished the widow to attend to, was writing her +directions as Caroline entered, much to the latter's increased +annoyance, as her mother's business with her would thus be retarded, and +every minute drew the time of Annie's appointment nearer. She could +scarcely conceal her impatience, and did venture to beg her mother to +tell her what she required. + +"Your attention, Caroline, for a time," she replied, so coldly, that her +daughter felt instantly something was wrong, though what she guessed +not, for she knew not that St. Eval had obtained the sanction of her +parents for his addresses; and she little imagined he could have +anything to do with the displeasure she saw so clearly marked. + +"You will wait, if you please, till I have finished writing, as this +cannot be delayed. Lord St. Eval leaves town in a very short time, and I +send this by him." + +"Lord St. Eval," thought Caroline, suddenly becoming alarmed, "surely +mamma and papa know nothing of his offer." + +A few minutes passed in silence, which was broken by the sound of +carriage-wheels stopping at the door, and Robert almost instantly after +entered with Miss Grahame's love, saying she could not wait a minute, +and hoped Miss Hamilton was ready. + +"Miss Grahame!" repeated Mrs. Hamilton, in an accent of surprise, before +Caroline had time to make any answer; "Caroline, why have you not +mentioned this engagement? You do not generally make appointments +without at least consulting me, if you no longer think it necessary to +request my permission. Where are you going with Annie?" + +"To Oxford Street, I believe," she answered carelessly, to conceal her +rising indignation at this interference of her mother. + +"If you require anything there, you can go with me by and bye. Robert, +give my compliments to Miss Grahame, and say from me, Miss Hamilton is +particularly engaged with me at present, and therefore cannot keep her +engagement to-day. Return here as soon as you have delivered my +message." + +"Mother!" burst from Caroline's lips, in an accent of uncontrollable +anger, as soon as the servant had left the room; but with a strong +effort she checked herself, and hastily walked to the window. + +An expression of extreme pain passed across her mother's features as she +looked towards her, but she took no notice till Robert had returned, and +had been dismissed with her note to be given to Emmeline to transmit +with hers. + +"Caroline," she then said, with dignity, yet perhaps less coldly than +before, "if you will give me your attention for a short time, you will +learn the cause of my displeasure, which is perhaps at present +incomprehensible, unless, indeed, your own conscience has already +reproached you; but before I commence on any other subject, I must +request that you will make no more appointments with Miss Grahame +without my permission. This is not the first time you have done so; I +have not noticed it previously, because I thought your own good sense +would have told you that you were acting wrong, and contrary to those +principles of candour I believed you to possess." + +"You were always prejudiced against Annie," answered Caroline, with +rising anger, for she had quite determined not to sit silent while her +mother spoke, cost what it might. + +"I am not speaking of Annie, Caroline, but to you. The change in your +conduct since you have become thus intimate with her, might indeed +justify my prejudice, but on that I am not now dwelling. I do not +consider Miss Malison a fit chaperon for my daughter, and therefore I +desire you will not again join her in her drives." + +"Every other girl of my station has the privilege of at least choosing +her own companions without animadversion," replied Caroline, +indignantly, "and in the simple thing of making appointments without +interference it is hard that I alone am to be an exception." + +"If you look around the circle in which I visit intimately, Caroline, +you will find that did you act according to your own wishes, you would +stand more alone than were you to regard mine. I have done wrong in ever +allowing you to be as intimate with Miss Grahame as you are. You looked +surprised and angry when I mentioned the change that had taken place in +your conduct." + +"I had sufficient reason for surprise," replied Caroline, impatiently, +"I was not aware that my character was so weak, as to turn and change +with every new acquaintance." + +"Are you then the same girl you were at Oakwood?" demanded Mrs. +Hamilton, gravely yet sadly. + +A sudden pang of conscience smote the heart of the mistaken girl at +these words, a sob rose choking in her throat, and she longed to have +given vent to the tears which pride, anger, and remorse were summoning, +but she would not, and answered according to those evil whisperings, +which before she had only indulged in secret. + +"If I am changed," she answered passionately, "it is because neither you +nor papa are the same. At Oakwood I was free, I had full liberty to act, +speak, think as I pleased, while here a chain is thrown around my +simplest action; my very words are turned into weapons against me; my +friendship disapproved of, and in that at least surely I may have +liberty to choose for myself." + +"You have," replied Mrs. Hamilton mildly. "I complain not, Caroline, of +the pain you have inflicted upon me, in so completely withdrawing your +confidence and friendship, to bestow them upon a young girl. I control +not your affection, but it is my duty, and I will obey it, to warn you +when I see your favourite companion likely to lead you wrong. Had your +every thought and feeling been open to my inspection as at Oakwood, +would you have trifled as you have with the most sacred feelings of a +fellow-creature? would you have called forth love by every winning art, +by marked preference to reject it, when acknowledged, with scorn, with +triumph ill concealed? would you have sported thus with a heart whose +affections would do honour to the favoured one on whom they were +bestowed? would you have cast aside in this manner all that integrity +and honour I hoped and believed were your own? Caroline, you have +disappointed and deceived your parents; you have blighted their fondest +hopes, and destroyed, sinfully destroyed, the peace of a noble, +virtuous, excellent young man, who loved you with all the deep fervour +of an enthusiastic soul. To have beheld him your husband would have +fulfilled every wish, every hope entertained by your father and myself. +I would have intrusted your happiness to his care without one doubt +arising within me; and you have spurned his offer, rejected him without +reason, without regret, without sympathy for his wounded and +disappointed feelings, without giving him one hope that in time his +affection might be returned. Caroline, why have you thus decidedly +rejected him? what is there in the young man you see to bid you tremble +for your future happiness?" + +Caroline answered not; she had leaned her arms on the cushion of the +couch, and buried her face upon them, while her mother spoke, and Mrs. +Hamilton in vain waited for her reply. + +"Caroline," she continued, in a tone of such appealing affection, it +seemed strange that it touched not the heart of her child, "Caroline, I +will not intrude on your confidence, but one question I must ask, and I +implore you to answer me truly--do you love another?" + +Still Caroline spoke not, moved not. Her mother continued, "If you do, +why should you hide it from me, your own mother, Caroline? You believe +my conduct changed towards you, but you have condemned me without proof. +You have abandoned my sympathy--shrunk from my love. Try me now, my +sweet child; if you love another, confess it, and we will do what we can +to make that love happy; if it be returned, why should you conceal it? +and if it be not, Caroline, my child, will you refuse even the poor +comfort your mother can bestow?" + +She spoke in vain; but could she have read her daughter's heart at that +moment, maternal affection might not have been so deeply pained as it +was by this strange silence. Regret, deep, though unavailing, had been +Caroline's portion, from the moment she had reflected soberly on her +rejection of St. Eval. She recalled his every word, his looks of +respectful yet ardent admiration, and she wept at that infatuation which +had bade her act as she had done; and then his look of controlled +contempt stung her to the quick. He meant not, perhaps, that his glance +should have so clearly denoted that she had sunk in his estimation, it +did not at the moment, but it did when in solitude she recalled it, and +she felt that she deserved it. In vain in those moments did she struggle +to call up the vision of Lord Alphingham, his words of love, his looks +of even more fervid passion, his image would not rise to banish that of +St. Eval; and if Caroline had not still been blinded by the influence +and arguments of Annie, had she given her own good sense one half-hour's +uncontrolled dominion, she would have discovered, that if love had +secretly and unsuspiciously entered her heart, it was not for Lord +Alphingham. Had she really loved him, she could not have resisted the +fond appeal of her mother; but to express in words all the confused and +indefinable emotions then filling her heart was impossible. She +continued for several minutes silent, and Mrs. Hamilton felt too deeply +pained and disappointed to speak again. Her daughter had spoken to her +that morning as she had seldom done even in her childhood. Then her +mother could look forward to years of reason and maturity for the +improvement of those errors; now others had arisen, and if her control +were once so entirely thrown aside, could she ever regain sufficient +influence to lead her right. Seldom had Caroline's conduct given her so +much pain as in the disclosures and events of that morning. + +"Is it absolutely necessary," Caroline at length said, summoning, as her +aunt Eleanor had often done, pride to drown the whisperings of +conscience, "that I must love another, because I rejected Lord St. Eval? +In such an important step as marriage, I should imagine my own +inclinations were the first to be consulted. It would be strange indeed, +if, after all I have heard you say on the evil of forcing young women to +marry, that you should compel your own child to accept the first offer +she received." + +"You do me injustice, Caroline," replied her mother, controlling with an +effort natural displeasure; "St. Eval would not accept an unwilling +bride, nor after what has passed would your father and myself deem you +worthy to become his wife." + +"Then long may this paragon of excellence remain away," replied +Caroline, with indignant haughtiness kindling in every feature. "I have +no wish ever to associate again with one by whose side I am deemed so +unworthy, even by my parents." + +"Those who love you best, Caroline, are ever the first to behold and +deplore your faults. Have you acted honourably? have you done worthily +in exciting love merely to give pain, to amuse and gratify your own love +of power?" + +"I have done no more than other girls do with impunity, without even +notice; and surely that which is so generally practised cannot demand +such severe censure as you bestow on it." + +"And therefore you would make custom an excuse for sin, Caroline. Would +you have spoken thus a few months since? would you have questioned the +justice of your mother's sentences? and yet you say you are not changed. +Is it any excuse for a wrong action, because others do it? Had you been +differently instructed it might be, but not when from your earliest +years I have endeavoured to reason with, and to convince you of the sin +of coquetry, to which from a child you have been inclined. You have +acted more sinfully than many whose coquetry has been more general. You +devoted yourself to one alone, encouraged, flattered, because you saw he +was already attracted, instead of adhering to that distant behaviour +which would have at once told him you could feel no more for him than as +a friend. You would have prevented future suffering, by banishing from +the first all secret hopes; but no, you wished to prove you could +accomplish more than others, by captivating one so reserved and superior +as St. Eval. Do not interrupt me by a denial, Caroline, for you dare not +deliberately say such was not your motive. That noble integrity which I +have so long believed your own, you have exiled from your heart. Your +entire conduct towards St. Eval has been one continued falsehood, and +are you then worthy to be united to one who is truth, honour, nobleness +itself? Had you loved another, your rejection of this young man might +have been excused, but not your behaviour towards him; for that not one +good reason can be brought forward in excuse. I am speaking severely, +Caroline, and perhaps my every word may alienate your confidence and +affection still farther from me; but my duty shall be done, painful as +it may be both to yourself and me. I cannot speak tamely on a subject in +which the future character and welfare of my child are concerned. I can +no longer trust in your integrity. Spite of your change in manner and in +feeling towards me, I still confided in your unsullied honour; that I +can no longer do, you have forfeited my confidence, Caroline, and not +until I see a total change of conduct can you ever hope to regain it. +That perhaps will not grieve you, as it would once have done; but unless +you redeem your character," she continued "the serious displeasure of +both your father and myself will be yours, and we shall, in all +probability, find some means of withdrawing you from the society which +has been so injurious to the purity of your character. Whatever others +may do, it is your duty to act according to the principles of your +parents, and not to those of others; and therefore, for the future, I +desire you will abide by my criterion of right and wrong, and not by the +misleading laws of custom. When you have conquered the irritation and +anger which my words have occasioned, you may perhaps agree to the +justice of what I have said, till then I do not expect it; but whether +your reason approves of it or not, I desire your implicit obedience. If +you have anything you desire to do, you may leave me, Caroline, I do not +wish to detain you any longer." + +In silence, too sullen to give any hope of a repentant feeling or +judgment, convinced, Caroline had listened to her mother's words. They +were indeed unusually severe; but her manner from the beginning of that +interview could not have lessened the displeasure which she already +felt. We have known Mrs. Hamilton from the commencement of her career, +when as a girl not older than Caroline herself, she mingled with the +world, and we cannot fail to have perceived her detestation of the +fashionable sin of coquetry. The remembrance of Eleanor and all the +evils she entailed upon herself by the indulgence of that sinful fault, +were still vividly acute, and cost what it might, both to herself and, +who was dearer still, her child, she would do her duty, and endeavour to +turn her from the evil path. She saw that Caroline was in no mood for +gentle words and tenderness to have any effect, and therefore, though at +variance as it was to her nature, she spoke with some severity and her +usual unwavering decision. She could read no promise of amendment or +contrition in those haughty and sullen features, but she urged no more, +for it might only exasperate and lead her farther from conviction. + +For some few minutes Caroline remained in that same posture. Evil +passions of varied nature suddenly appeared to gain ascendancy in that +innately noble heart, and prevented all expressions that might have +soothed her mother's solicitude. Hastily rising, without a word, she +abruptly left the room, and retired to her own, where she gave vent to a +brief but passionate flood of tears, but they cooled not the fever of +her brain; her haughty spirit revolted from her mother's just severity. + +"To be scolded, threatened, desired to obey, like a child, an infant; +what girl of my age would bear it tamely? Well might Annie say I was a +slave, not permitted to act or even think according to my own +discretion; well might she say no other mother behaved to her daughters +as mine; to be kept in complete thraldom; to be threatened, if I do not +behave better, to be removed from the scenes I so much love, buried +again at home I suppose; is it a wonder I am changed? Is it strange that +I should no longer feel for mamma as formerly? and even Emmeline must +condemn me, call me to account for my actions, and my intimacy with +Annie is made a subject of reproach; but if I do not see her as often as +before, I can write, thank heaven, and at least her sympathy and +affection will be mine." + +Such was the tenor of her secret thoughts, and she followed them up by +writing to her friend a lengthened and heightened description of all +that had occurred that morning, dwelling long and indignantly on what +she termed the cruel and unjust severity of her mother, and imploring, +as such confidential letters generally did, Annie's secrecy and +sympathy. The epistle was despatched, and quickly answered, in a style +which, as might be imagined, increased all Caroline's feelings of +indignation towards her parents, and bade her rely still more +confidingly on her false friend, who, she taught herself to believe, was +almost the only person who really cared for her best interests. + +Days passed, but neither Mr. nor Mrs. Hamilton changed in the coldness +of their manner towards their child. Perhaps such conduct added fire to +the already resentful girl; but surely they might be pardoned for acting +as they did. Caroline's irritability increased, and Annie's secret +letters were ever at hand to soothe while they excited. She ever +endeavoured to turn her friend's attention from what she termed her +severe trials to the devotion felt towards her by Lord Alphingham, +declaring that each interview confirmed more and more her belief in his +passionate admiration. The evil influence which Miss Grahame's letters +had upon the mind of Caroline in her private hours, was apparent in her +manner to Lord Alphingham, when they chanced to meet, but even more +guarded than she had hitherto been, did Caroline become in her behaviour +towards him when her parents were present. Their conduct had confirmed, +to her heated and mistaken fancy, Annie's representation of their +unjustifiable severity, and that, indignant at her rejection of St. +Eval, they would unhesitatingly refuse their consent to her acceptance +of the Viscount. Caroline thought not to ask herself how then is my +intimacy with him to end? She only enjoyed the present as much as she +could, while the coldness of her parents, amidst all her pride and +boasted stoicism, still tortured her; and to the future Annie as yet +completely prevented her looking. Miss Grahame's plans appeared indeed +to thrive, and many were the confidential and triumphant conversations +she held upon the subject with Miss Malison, who became more and more +indignant at Mrs. Hamilton's intrusive conduct in taking so much notice +of Lilla, notwithstanding the tales industriously circulated against +her. Her own severity and malevolence, however, appeared about to become +her foes; for about this time a slight change with regard to the +happiness of her injured pupil took place, which threatened to banish +her from Mr. Grahame's family. + +One morning Mrs. Hamilton, accompanied by Ellen, called on Lady Helen +rather earlier than usual, but found their friend not yet visible, an +attack of indisposition confining her to her couch later than usual, +but Lady Helen sending to entreat her friend not to leave her house +without seeing her, Mrs. Hamilton determined on waiting. Annie had gone +out with Miss Malison. + +"No wonder our poor Lilla proceeds but slowly in her education," +remarked Mrs. Hamilton, when the footman gave her this information. "If +she be so much neglected, her father has no right to expect much +progress. I wish from my heart that I could think of some plan that +would tend not only to the happiness of this poor girl, but in the end +to that of her father also. Were those faults now apparent in her +character judiciously removed, I feel confident Mr. Grahame would have +more comfort in her than in either of his other children." + +"She is always very different when she is with us," observed Ellen. "I +can never discover those evil passions of which so many accuse her; +passionate she is, but that might be controlled." + +"It never can he while Miss Malison remains with her, for her treatment +is such that each year but increases the evil." A sound as of some one +sobbing violently in the adjoining room interrupted their conversation. +Fancying it came from the object of their conversation, Mrs. Hamilton +opened the folding-doors, and discovered her young friend weeping +violently, almost convulsively, on the sofa. Ever alive to sorrow, of +whatever nature or at whatever age, Mrs. Hamilton, followed by Ellen, +hastened towards her. + +"What has happened, Lilla?" she said, soothingly. "What has chanced to +call forth this violent grief? tell me, my love. You know you need not +hesitate to trust me with your sorrows." + +Unused, save from that one dear friend, to hear the voice of sympathy +and kindness, Lilla flung her arms passionately round her neck, and +clung to her for some few minutes till her choking sobs permitted her to +speak. + +"Aunt Augusta says I am so wicked, so very wicked, that mamma ought not +to keep me at home, that I am not at all too old to go to school, and +mamma says that I shall go--and--and"-- + +"But what occasioned your aunt to advise such an alternative?" demanded +Mrs. Hamilton, gently. + +"Oh, because--because I know I was very wicked, but I could not help it. +Miss Malison had been tormenting me all the morning, and exciting my +anger; and then Annie chose to do all she could to call it forth before +mamma, and so I just told her what I thought of both her and her amiable +confidant. I hate them both," she continued, with a vehemence even the +presence of Mrs. Hamilton could not restrain, "and I wish from my heart +I could never see them more." + +"If you gave vent to such sinful words before your mother," replied Mrs. +Hamilton, gravely, "I do not wonder at your aunt's suggesting what she +did. How often have I entreated you to leave the room when your sister +commences her unkind endeavours to excite your anger, and thus give your +mother a proof of your consideration for her present state of health, +and evince to your sister, that if you cannot calmly listen to her +words, you can at least avoid them." + +"Mamma never takes any notice, however much I may endeavour to please +her; if she would only caress me, and praise me sometimes, I know I +should be a very different girl. Then I could bear all Annie's cruel +words; but I will not, I will never put up with them, and permit either +her or Miss Malison to govern me and chain down my spirit, as they try +all they can to do. No one can ever know the constant ill-treatment +which I receive from both; everything I do, every word I speak, is +altered to suit their purpose, and mamma believes all they say. They +shall feel my power one day when they least expect it. I will not be +made so constantly miserable unrevenged." + +"Lilla, dear Lilla," exclaimed Ellen, imploringly, "do not speak thus; +you do not know what you say. You would not return evil for evil, and on +your sister. Do not, pray do not let your anger, however just, obtain so +much dominion." + +"Annie never treats me as a sister, and I do not see why I should +practise such forbearance towards her; but I will do all I can, indeed I +will, if you will persuade papa not to send me from home. Oh, do not +look at me so gravely and sadly, dearest, dearest Mrs. Hamilton," +continued the impetuous and misguided but naturally right feeling child. + +"I can bear any one's displeasure but yours; but when you look +displeased with me I feel so very, very wretched. I know I deserve to +lose all your kindness, for I never follow your advice; I deserve that +you should hate me, as every one else does; but you do not know all I +have to endure. Oh! do not let me go from home." + +"I cannot persuade your father to let you remain at home, my dear girl," +replied Mrs. Hamilton, drawing her young companion closer to her, and +speaking with soothing tenderness, "because I agree with your aunt in +thinking it would be really the best thing for you." + +"Then I have lost every hope," exclaimed the impatient girl, clasping +her hands despairingly. "Papa would never have consented, if you had +advised him not, and you, you must think me as wicked as aunt Augusta +does;" and the tears she had checked now burst violently forth anew. + +"You mistake me, my love, quite mistake me; it is not because I believe +you are not fitted to associate with your domestic circle. I believe if +she were but properly encouraged, my little Lilla would add much to the +comfort of both her parents; and I do not at all despair of seeing that +the case. But at present I must advise your leaving home for a few +years, because I really do think it would add much to your happiness." + +"Happiness!" repeated Lilla, in an accent of extreme surprise. "School +bring happiness?" + +"Are you happy at home, my love? is not your life at present one +continued scene of wretchedness? What is it that you so much dislike in +the idea of school?" + +"The control, the subordination, the irksome formula of lessons, prim +governesses, satirical scholars." Neither Mrs. Hamilton nor Ellen could +prevent a smile. + +"If such things are all you dread, my dear, I have no fear of soon +overcoming them," the former said, playfully. "I will do all I can to +persuade your father not to send you to a large fashionable seminary, +where such things may be the case; but I know a lady who lives at +Hampstead, and under whose kind guidance I am sure you will be happy, +much more so than you are now. If you would only think calmly on the +subject, I am sure you would agree in all I urge." + +"But no one treats me as a reasonable person at home. If mamma sends me +to school, it will not be for my happiness, but because everybody thinks +me so wicked, there is no managing me at home; and then in the holidays +I shall hear nothing but the wonderful improvement school discipline has +made, it will be no credit to my own efforts, and so there will be no +pleasure in making any." + +"Will there be no pleasure in making your father happy, Lilla? Will his +approbation be nothing?" + +"But he never praises me; I am too much afraid of him to go and caress +him, as I often wish to do, and tell him if he will only call me his +dear Lilla, I would be good and gentle, and learn all he desires. If he +would but let me love him I should be much happier than I am." + +Mrs. Hamilton thought so too; and deeply she regretted that mistaken +sternness which had so completely alienated the affections of his child. +Soothingly she answered-- + +"But your father dearly loves you, Lilla, though, perhaps your violent +conduct has of late prevented his showing it. If you were, for his sake, +to become gentle and amiable, and overcome your fears of his sternness, +believe me, my dear Lilla, you would be rendering him and yourself much +happier. You always tell me you believe everything I say. Suppose you +trust in my assertion, and try the experiment; and if you want a second +voice on my side, I appear to your friend Ellen for her vote as to the +truth of what I say." + +Mrs. Hamilton spoke playfully, and Ellen answered in the same spirit. +Lilla's passionate tears had been checked by the kind treatment she +received, and in a softened mood she answered-- + +"But I cannot become so while Miss Malison has anything to do with me. +I cannot bear her treatment gently. Papa does not know all I have to +endure with her." + +"And therefore do I so earnestly wish you would consent to my persuading +your father to let you go to Hampstead," answered Mrs. Hamilton, gently. + +"But then papa will not think it is for his sake I endeavour to correct +my faults; he will say it is the school, and not my own efforts; and if +I go, I shall never, never see you, nor go to dear Moorlands, for I +shall be away while papa and mamma are there; away from everybody I +love. Oh, that would not make me happy!" and clinging to Mrs. Hamilton, +the really affectionate girl again burst into tears. + +"What am I to urge in reply to these very weighty objections, my dear +Lilla?" replied Mrs. Hamilton. "In the first place, your father shall +know that every conquest you make is for his sake; he shall not think +you were forced to submission. In the next, compulsion is not in my +friend's system, and as I am very intimate with Mrs. Douglas, I shall +very often come and see you when I am in town, your midsummer holidays +will also occur during that time: and, lastly, if your papa and mamma +will consent, you shall see Moorlands every year; for I shall ask Mr. +Grahame to bring you with him in his annual Christmas visit to his +estate, and petition that he will leave you behind him to spend the +whole of your winter vacation with me and Ellen at Oakwood. Now, are all +objections waived, or has my very determined opponent any more to bring +forward?" + +Lilla did not answer, but she raised her head from her kind friend's +shoulder, and pushing back the disordered locks of her bright hair, +looked up in her face as if no more sorrow could be her portion. + +"Oh, I would remain at school a whole year together, if I might spend my +vacation at Oakwood with you, and Ellen, and Emmeline, and all!" she +exclaimed, with a glee as wild and childish as all her former emotion +had been. Lady Helen at that instant entered, and after languidly +greeting Mrs. Hamilton and Ellen, exclaimed-- + +"For heaven's sake, Lilla, go away! your appearance is enough to +frighten any one. I should be absolutely ashamed of you, if any friend +were to come in unexpectedly. Perhaps you may choose to obey me now that +Mrs. Hamilton is present; she little knows what a trouble you are at +home," she continued, languidly. + +The flush of passion again mounted to Lilla's cheek, but Ellen, taking +her arm, entreated to go with her, and they left the room together, +while Lady Helen amused her friend by a long account of her domestic +misfortunes, the insolence of her upper domestics, the heedlessness of +her elder, and the fearful passions of her younger daughter, even the +carelessness of her husband's manner towards her, notwithstanding her +evidently declining health, all these and similar sorrows were poured +into the sympathising ear of Mrs. Hamilton, and giving clearer and +clearer evidence of Lady Helen's extreme and increasing weakness of mind +and character. + +Great, indeed, was the astonishment of this indolent mother when Mrs. +Hamilton urged the necessity of sending Lilla to school. Without +accusing Miss Malison of any want of judgment, she was yet enabled to +work on Lady Augusta Denhain's words, and prove the good effects that a +removal from home for a few years might produce on Lilla's character. + +Lady Augusta's advice had been merely remembered during that lady's +presence, but seconded as it now was by the earnest pleadings of Mrs. +Hamilton, she determined on rousing herself sufficiently to put it in +force, if her husband consented; but to obtain his approbation was a +task too terrible for her nerves, and she entreated Mrs. Hamilton to +speak with him on the subject. Willingly she consented, only requesting +that Lady Helen would not mention her intentions either to Annie or Miss +Malison till her husband had been consulted, and to this Lady Helen +willingly consented, for in secret she dreaded Miss Malison's +lamentations and reproaches, when this arrangement should be known. + +When Mr. Grahame, in compliance with Mrs. Hamilton's message, called on +her the following morning, and heard the cause of his summons, his +surprise almost equalled that of his wife. He knew her dislike to the +plan of sending girls to school, however it might be in vogue; and +almost in terror he asked if she proposed this scheme because the evil +character of his child required some such desperate expedient. It was +easy to prove to him such was very far from her meaning. She spoke more +openly on the character of Lilla than she had yet done, for she thought +their long years of intimacy demanded candour on her part; and each +year, while it increased the evil of Lilla's present situation +heightened her earnest desire to draw the father and child more closely +together. She did not palliate her faults, but she proved that they were +increased by the constant contradiction and irritation which she had to +encounter. She repeated all that had passed between them the preceding +day, unconsciously and cautiously condemning Grahame's excessive +sternness, by relating, almost verbatim, Lilla's simply expressed wish +that her father would let her love him. + +She gained her point. The softened and agitated father felt +self-condemned as she proceeded; and earnestly implored her to give him +one more proof of her friendship, by recommending him some lady under +whose care he could with safety place his erring, yet naturally +noble-minded and warm-hearted child. A fashionable seminary, he was +sure, would do her more harm than good, and he listened with eagerness +to Mrs. Hamilton's description of Mrs. Douglas. The widow of a naval +officer, who had for several years been in the habit of educating ten +young ladies of the highest rank, and she mentioned one or two who had +been her pupils, whose worth and mental endowments were well known to +Grahame. + +"Do not be guided entirely by me on a subject so important," she said, +after recalling those families to his mind, whose daughters had been +placed there; "make inquiries of all who know Mrs. Douglas, and see her +yourself before you quite decide. That I have a very high opinion of her +is certain; but I should be sorry if you were to place Lilla with her +upon my advice alone, when, in all probability," she added, with a +smile, "you will find all Lady Helen's family opposed to the +arrangement." + +"As they have never guided me right when they have interfered with my +children, their approbation or disapproval will have little weight in my +determination," answered Grahame. "You have awakened me to a sense of +my duty, Mrs. Hamilton, for which I cannot sufficiently express my +gratitude. With too much reliance upon the opinions of others I have +regarded the many tales brought against my poor child, and now I see how +greatly her faults have been occasioned by mistaken treatment. I thought +once I could never have parted with a daughter for school, but now I see +it will be a kindness to do so; and pain me as it will, now I know that +I may in time win her affections, your advice shall be followed." + +"You must consent to part with her for one vacation also," replied Mrs. +Hamilton, playfully. "I have promised, in answer to her weighty +objection that she shall never see Moorlands again, to persuade you to +let her spend Christmas at Oakwood. You must consent, or I shall teach +Lilla a lesson of rebellion, and carry her off from Mrs. Douglas by +force." + +"Willingly, gratefully," exclaimed Mr. Grahame. + +"And you will promise me to permit her to love you, to use her own +simple affectionate words before she leaves you; you will not terrify +her by the cold sternness you frequently manifest towards her, and prove +that you take sufficient interest in her, to love her more for every +conquest she makes." + +"Faithfully, faithfully I promise, my kind friend." + +"Then I am satisfied," replied Mrs. Hamilton, her countenance glowing +with benevolent pleasure. "I shall, I trust, one day succeed in making +my little Lilla happy, and thus add to the comfort of her parents. We +are old friends, Mr. Grahame," she added, "and therefore I do not +hesitate to express the pleasure you have given me by thus promising to +think upon my advice. I began to fear that you would be displeased at +my interference, deeming my advice impertinent and needless. I have +endeavoured to impress upon Lilla the necessity of a temporary absence +from home, and have in part succeeded; and having Lady Helen's sanction +to speak with you, I could hesitate no longer." + +"Nor do I hesitate one moment to act upon your disinterested advice, my +dear friend. Your word is enough; but as you so earnestly wish it, I +will this very hour seek those of my friends who are acquainted with +Mrs. Douglas. I must leave Lilla to express her gratitude for her father +and herself." + +Mrs. Hamilton was soon placed at rest regarding the destination of her +young friend. There was not a dissenting voice as to Mrs. Douglas's +worth, one general opinion of satisfaction prevailed; but the most +gratifying tribute Grahame felt, was the affection and esteem which her +former pupils still fondly encouraged towards her. Thus prepossessed, +her appearance and manners did much to strengthen his resolve, and +Grahame now felt armed for all encounters with those who, presuming on +their near relationship to his wife, would bring forward numberless +objections to his plans; but he was agreeably mistaken. Lilla was looked +upon by them all as such an evil-minded, ill-informed girl, that it +signified little where she was placed, as she generally brought +discredit on all who had anything to do with her. Miss Malison, however, +excited their sympathy, and Annie declared it was a shameful and +dishonourable thing to dismiss her without notice, after so many years +of devoted service to their family. Poor Lady Helen had to encounter the +storm of upbraiding from her daughter, and the tears and sobs of the +governess, at the ill-treatment she received. In vain Lady Helen +accepted her protestations that she had done her duty; that she was sure +all that could be done for Miss Lilla had been done. Annie declared +that, though her services were no longer required for her ungrateful +sister, she could not do without Miss Malison, for her mother's health +seldom permitted her to walk or drive out. She should absolutely die of +_ennui_ without some one to act in those cases as her chaperon. In this +she was ably seconded by all her mother's family, whose _protégée_ Miss +Malison had long been, and, against his better judgment, Grahame at +length consented that Miss Malison should remain in his family till she +should get another situation as finishing governess. This, of course, +Miss Grahame had determined should not be for some little time. + +Mrs. Hamilton had been particularly cautious, in her interview with Mr. +Grahame, not to speak any word for or against Miss Malison; perhaps had +she said what she really thought, even this concession would not have +been made. + +Mr. Grahame's fixed and sudden determination to send Lilla to school +was, of course, laid by Annie and her confidant to Mrs. Hamilton's +charge, and increased not a little their prejudice against her, adding +fresh incentive to their schemes for the destruction of her peace, which +Caroline's self-willed conduct now rendered even more easy than it had +previously been. + +When all was arranged, when it was decidedly settled that Lilla should +join Mrs. Douglas's establishment at the conclusion of the midsummer +vacation, her father quietly entered the study where she was alone, to +give her this information, and his really fond heart could not gaze on +her without admiration. She was now nearly fifteen, though in looks, +manners, and conversation, from being kept under such continual +restraint, she always appeared at first sight very much younger. +Childlike in every movement, even her impetuosity might have aided the +deception; and Lady Helen herself had so often indolently answered +questions concerning her daughter's age, she believed she was about +twelve or thirteen, that at length she really believed it was so. It was +Annie and Miss Malison's interest to preserve this illusion; for were +she recognised as fifteen, many privileges might have been acceded to +her, very much at variance with their interest. Annie had no desire for +a rival to present herself, which, had her sister appeared in public, +would undoubtedly have been the case; Lilla gave promise of beauty, +which, though not perhaps really so perfect as Annie's, would certainly +have attracted fully as much notice. She was drawing a tiny wreath of +brilliant flowers on a small portfolio, which she was regarding with a +complacency that added brilliancy to her animated features. At her +father's well-known step she looked up in some little terror, and rose, +as was her custom whenever she first saw him in the morning; her fear +could not check the sparkling lustre of her eye, and Grahame, taking her +hand, said kindly-- + +"I have some news for my little girl, which I trust will prove as +agreeable as I have every reason to hope they may. Mrs. Douglas will +gladly consent to receive my Lilla as an inmate of her happy family." + +The flush of animation, the sparkling lustre of her eye faded on the +instant, and she turned away. + +"Why, our kind friend, Mrs. Hamilton, bade me hope this would be +pleasing intelligence; has she deceived me, love?" continued her father, +drawing her with such unwonted tenderness to him, that, after a glance +of bewilderment, she flung her arms round his neck, and for the first +time in her life wept passionately on her father's shoulder. + +"Can it be pleasure to hear I am to go from you and mamma?" she +exclaimed, clinging to him with all the passionate warmth of her nature, +and forgetting all her terror in that one moment of uncontrolled +feeling. Her simple words confirmed at once all that Mrs. Hamilton had +said in her favour, and the now gratified father seated her, as he would +a little child, on his knee, and with affectionate caresses gradually +soothed her to composure. Long did they converse together, and from that +moment Lilla's happiness commenced. She could not at once lose her dread +of her father's sternness, but the slightest hint from him was enough; +and frequently, as Grahame felt her affectionate manner, would he wonder +he had been blind to her character so long. The idea of school lost its +repugnance. Her father's kindness enabled her to keep her determination, +to prove, by the indulgence of the highest spirits, that going to +school, instead of being a punishment, as her aunt Augusta intended it +to be, was a privilege and a pleasure. That she was accused of want of +feeling she little heeded, now that her father invited and encouraged +her affection. Lady Helen wondered at her change of manner, but +indolence and the prejudice constantly instilled by Annie and Miss +Malison, prevented all indulgence of more kindly feelings. As things +remained in this state for some weeks in Mr. Grahame's establishment, we +will now return to Mr. Hamilton's family. + +It was about this time, some three or four weeks before the end of the +Oxford term, that letters arrived from Percy and Herbert, containing +matters of interesting information, and others which caused some anxiety +in the breast of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton. On the first subject both the +brothers wrote, so deeply interested had they become in it. Among the +servitors or free scholars of their college was a young man, whom they +had frequently noticed the last year, but never recollected having seen +before. He shrunk, as it appeared in sensitiveness from every eye, kept +aloof from all companions, as if he felt himself above those who held +the same rank in the University. Herbert's gentle and quickly +sympathising heart had ever felt pained, when he first went to college, +to see the broad distinction made between the servitors and other +collegians. He felt it pain to see them, as, in their plain gowns and +caps, they stood or sat apart from their brother students at their +meals, but perceiving by degrees they were all happy in their rank, +being, in general, sons of the poorer and less elevated classes of +society, happy to obtain an excellent education free of expense, he had +conquered these feelings, and imagined justly that they were, in all +probability, indifferent to the distinction of rank. But one amongst +them had recalled all these kindly sentiments, not only in the heart of +Herbert but in that of Percy, who was in general too reckless to regard +matters so minutely as his brother. The subject of their notice was a +young man, perhaps some two or three years older than the heir of +Oakwood, but with an expression of melancholy, which frequently amounted +almost to anguish, ever stamped on his high and thoughtful brow, and his +large, searching, dark grey eye. He was pale, but it appeared more from +mental suffering than disease, and at times there was a proud even a +haughty curl on his lip, that might have whispered he had seen better +days. He was never observed to be familiar with his brother servitors, +and shrunk with proud humility from the notice of his superiors. The +servile offices exacted from those of his degree were performed with +scrupulous exactness, but Herbert frequently beheld at such times a +flush of suffering mount into his cheek, and when his task was done, he +would fold his arms in his gown, and drop his head upon them, as if his +spirit revolted in agony from its employment. The other servitors were +fond of aping their superiors, by a studied affectation of similar dress +and manner, but this young man was never once seen to alter his plain +even coarse costume, and kept aloof from all appearance that would +assimilate him with those above him; and yet he was their +laughing-stock, the butt against which the pointed arrows of scorn, +contumely, ridicule, and censure were ever hurled, with a malevolence +that appeared strange to the benevolent hearts of the young Hamiltons, +who vainly endeavoured to check the public torrent. "He was not always +as he is now, and then, poor Welshman as he _is_, he always lorded it +over us, and we will requite him now," was the only reply they obtained; +but the first sentence touched a chord in Herbert's heart. Misfortune +might have reduced him to the rank he now held, and perhaps he struggled +vainly to teach his spirit submission; but how could he obtain his +friendship, in what manner succeed in introducing himself. Herbert was +naturally too reserved to make advances, however inclination prompted, +and some months passed in inactivity, though the wish to know him, and +by kindness remove his despondency, became more and more powerful to the +brothers. + +A side attack one day on the young Welshman, made with unwonted and +bitter sarcasm by an effeminate and luxurious scion of nobility, roused +the indignation of Percy. Retorting haughtily on the defensive, a +regular war of tongues took place. The masterly eloquence of Percy +carried the day, and he hoped young Myrvin was free from all further +attacks. He was mistaken: another party, headed by the defeated but +enraged Lord, who had been roused to a state of fury by young Hamilton's +appearance, surrounded the unhappy young man in the college court, and +preventing all egress, heaped every sarcastic insult upon him, words +that could not fail to sting his haughty spirit to the quick. Myrvin's +eye flashed with sudden and unwonted lustre, and ere Herbert, who with +his brother had hastily joined the throng, could prevent it, he had +raised his arm and felled his insulting opponent to the ground. A wild +uproar ensued, the civil officers appeared, and young Myrvin was +committed, under the charge of wilfully, and without provocation, +attacking the person of the right honourable Marquis of --. + +The indignation of Percy and Herbert was now at its height; and without +hesitation the former sought the principal of his college, and in a few +brief but emphatic sentences placed the whole affair before him in its +true light, condemning with much feeling the cowardly and cruel conduct +of the true aggressors, and so convinced the worthy man of the injustice +done towards the person of young Myrvin, that he was instantly +released, with every honour that could soothe his troubled feelings, +and a severe reprimand bestowed on the real authors of the affray. + +Percy pursued his advantage; the noble heart of the young Welshman was +touched by this generous interference in his behalf, and when the +brothers followed him in his solitary walk the following day, he +resisted them not. Gratefully he acknowledged the debt he owed them, +confessed he would rather have received such a benefit from them than +from any others in the college, and at length, unable to resist the +frankly proffered friendship of Percy, the silent entreaty of Herbert, +he grasped with convulsive pressure their offered hands, and promised +faithfully he would avoid them no more. From that hour the weight of his +reverses was less difficult to bear. In the society, the conversation of +Herbert, he forgot his cares; innate nobleness was visible in Myrvin's +every thought, act, and word, and he became dear indeed to the soul of +Herbert Hamilton, even as a brother he loved him. Warm, equally warm +perhaps, was the mutual regard of Myrvin and Percy, though the latter +was not formed for such deep unchanging emotion evinced in the character +of his brother. But it was not until some time after the commencement of +their friendship that Herbert could elicit from his companion the +history of his former life. + +It was simply this:--Arthur Myrvin was the only child of the rector of +Llangwillan, a small village in Wales, about ten or twelve miles from +Swansea. The living was not a rich one, but its emoluments enabled Mr. +Myrvin to live in comparative affluence and comfort; beloved, revered by +his parishioners, enabled to do good, to bestow happiness, to impart +the knowledge of the Christian faith, he beheld his flock indeed walking +in the paths of their Heavenly Shepherd. He had been enabled by the +economy of years to save sufficient to place his son respectably and +comfortably at college, and it was with no little pride he looked +forward to the time when those savings would be used for their +long-destined purpose. Arthur had grown beneath his eye; he had never +left his father's roof, and Mr. Myrvin trusted had imbibed principles +that would preserve him from the temptations of college life, and so +strong was this hope, that he parted from his son without one throb of +fear. + +The sudden change in his life was, however, too tempting an ordeal for +the young man. He associated with those above him both in rank and +fortune, who leading him into their extravagant follies, quickly +dissipated his allowance, which, though ample, permitted not +extravagance. About this time the noble proprietor of the Llangwillan +parish died, and its patronage fell to the disposal of a gay and +dissipated young man, who succeeded to the large estates. Inordinately +selfish, surrounded by ready flatterers, eager of gain, he was a +complete tyrant in his domains. + +The excessive beauty and fertility of Llangwillan, the industry and +simple habits of the inhabitants, excited the desire of possessing it in +the mind of one of these humble sycophants, and his point was very +speedily gained. Justice and humanity were alike banished from the code +of laws now in action, and, without preparation or excuse, Mr. Myrvin +was desired to quit that parish which had been his so long. His +incumbency expired with the death of the proprietor, and it had been +already disposed of. The grief of the old man and his humble friends was +long and deep; it was not openly displayed, the lessons of their beloved +pastor had too well instructed them in the duty of resignation; but aged +cheeks were wet with unwonted tears, and mingled with the sobs of +childhood. Men, women, youth, and little children alike wept, when their +pastor departed from the village. He who had been the shepherd of his +flock so long, was now cast aside as a worthless thing, and the old +man's heart was wellnigh broken. In a rude cot, forced on his acceptance +by a wealthy parishioner, situated some eight or ten miles from the +scene of his happiness, he took up his abode, and to him would the +villagers still throng each Sabbath, as formerly to the humble church, +and old Myrvin, in the midst of his own misfortunes, found time to pray +for that misguided and evil-directed man who had succeeded him in his +ministry, and brought down shame on his profession, and utterly +destroyed the peace which Llangwillan had enjoyed so long. + +Resignation by degrees spread over Myrvin's mind, but the conduct of his +son caused him fresh anxiety. The news of the change in his father's +life awakened Arthur from his lethargy; he saw the folly, the imprudence +of which he had been guilty; his father could no longer support him at +college. In three years he had squandered away that which, with economy, +would have served as maintenance for ten, and now he must leave the +college, or do that from which at first his very soul revolted; but the +image of his father, his injured father, rose before him. He could not +inflict upon him a disappointment so severe as his departure from +college would be. He would yet atone for his folly, and fulfil his +father's long-cherished hopes, and without consulting him, in a moment +of desperation, he sought the resident head of the University, and +imparted his wishes. The preliminaries were quickly settled, and the +next letter from Oxford which Mr. Myrvin received, contained the +intelligence that his son had reconciled his mind to the change, and +become a servitor. + +A glow of thanksgiving suffused the old man's heart, but he knew all the +inward and outward trials with which his son had to contend. Had he at +the first joined the college in the rank which he now held, he might not +have felt the change so keenly; but as it was, the pride and haughtiness +which had characterised him before, were now, as we have seen, returned +tenfold upon himself. He clothed himself outwardly in an invulnerable +armour of self-control and cold reserve, but inwardly his blood was in +one continued fever, until the friendship of Percy and Herbert soothed +his troubled feelings. The name of Hamilton, Herbert continued to state, +for it was he who wrote particularly of Arthur, the young man had +declared he knew well; but where he had heard it, or how, appeared like +a dream. He thought he had even seen Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton once, not +very many years ago; but so many changes in his life had occurred since +then, that the particulars of that meeting he could not remember. +"Myrvin and Llangwillan appear equally familiar to me," wrote Herbert; +"but even more than to Arthur they seem as the remembrances of an +indistinct dream. It has sometimes occurred to me that they are combined +with the recollection of my aunt, Mrs. Fortescue, and Arthur, to whom I +mentioned her death, suddenly recalled a dying lady and her two +children, in whom his father was very much interested. Fortescue he does +not well remember, but the little girl's name was Ellen, a pale, +dark-eyed and dark-haired, melancholy child, whom he used to call his +wife, and my cousin certainly answers this description. If it be indeed +the same, it is strange we should thus come together; and oh! my dearest +father, the benefit our family received from this venerable and injured +man, bids me long more intently that we could do something for him, and +that Arthur should be restored to his former position. He is of full +age, and quite capable of taking orders, and I have often thought, could +he reside with Mr. Howard the year previous to his ordination, it would +tend much more to his happiness and welfare than remaining here, even if +he was released from that grade, the oppression of which now hangs so +heavily upon him. Follies have been his, but they have been nobly +repented; and something within me whispers that the knowledge he is my +dearest and most intimate friend, that we mutually feel we are of +service to each other, will plead his cause and my request to my kind +and indulgent father, with even more force than the mere relation of +facts, interesting as that alone would be." + +He was right. The friend, the chosen and most intimate friend of their +younger son would ever have been an object of interest to Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton. That he was the son of the same good man who had acted so +benevolently towards Eleanor and her orphan children, who had soothed +her dying bed, and reconciled the parting sinner to her Maker, added +weight to the simple yet pathetic eloquence with which Herbert had +related his story. The injury he had sustained excited their just +indignation, and if the benevolence of their kind hearts had required +fresh incentives, the unfeigned grief of Ellen, as the tale of the old +man was related to her, would have given it. + +"Oh, that I had it in my power to offer a sufficient sum to tempt the +sordid and selfish being in whose possession Llangwillan now is," she +was heard one day to exclaim, when she imagined herself alone, "that I +might but restore it to Mr. Myrvin; that I might feel that good old man +was passing his latter years in the spot and amongst all those he so +much loved; that Arthur could break the chain that now so bitterly and +painfully distresses him. Dear, dear Mr. Myrvin, oh, how little did I +imagine, when my thoughts have wandered to you and Arthur, who was such +a dear consoling friend in my childish sorrow, that misery such as this +had been your portion; and I can do nothing, nothing to prove how often +I have thought of and loved you both--and my dear mother's grave, in the +midst of strangers," and she wept bitterly, little imagining her +soliloquy had been overheard by her aunt and uncle, who were almost +surprised at her vivid remembrance of those whom for the last seven +years she had scarcely seen, and of whom she so seldom heard; but it +heightened their desire to be of service to him who had once been so +kind a friend to their family. + +The contents of Percy's letter, to the rather alarming and mysterious +nature of which we have already alluded, will be found in the next +chapter. + + + + +CHAPTER VI. + + +"Malison, dear Malison, congratulate me; the game is in my own hands!" +exclaimed Miss Grahame one morning as she entered the private room of +her confidant, about a week after the receipt of the letters we have +mentioned, with every feature expressing triumphant yet malignant glee. + +"That has been the case some weeks, has it not?" replied Miss Malison. + +"Yes; but not so completely as at present. Caroline has just left me; +she was afraid of imparting in writing the important intelligence she +had to give me, important indeed, for it saves me a world of trouble: +though did I allow myself to think on her present situation of +suffering, I believe that I should repent her perfect and innocent +confidence in me. Her defence of my character, whenever it is attacked, +almost touches my heart; but her mother, her intrusive mother, that +would-be paragon of her sex, rises before me and continually urges me +on; she shall learn, to her cost, that her carefully-trained children +are not better than others." + +"She has learned it partly already, by your account," remarked Miss +Malison, concealing under a calm exterior her detestation of Mrs. +Hamilton. + +"She has. That rejection of St. Eval assisted me most agreeably; I did +not expect that Caroline's own spirit and self-will would have aided me +so effectually. That disappointment with St. Eval has affected Mrs. +Hamilton more deeply than she chooses to make visible. Her coldness and +severity towards her child spring from her own angry and mortified +feelings; however, she lays it to the score of Caroline's faulty +conduct, and my friendly letters have happily convinced Caroline such +is the case. In my most sanguine expectations of triumph, I never +imagined I should succeed so well in severing the link between Mrs. +Hamilton and her daughter. Confidence is utterly at an end between them, +and that would be sufficient to gratify any one but myself; but my +vengeance for the prejudice and dislike with which this perfect creature +regards me must be more fully satisfied, at present it is only soothed. +Now you know, _chère_ Malison, you are dying with curiosity to hear what +new assistance has started up; a little more patience and you shall know +all. You are aware with what bitter and resentful feelings Caroline +regards the treatment she receives from her parents, and also from +Emmeline, child as she is." + +"Perfectly; nor do I wonder at it. In this case the immaculate Mrs. +Hamilton does not appear to practise what she preaches. It is rather +wonderful, that one who says so much about gentle treatment doing more +good than harshness, should now make her own child suffer beneath her +severity.'" + +"As I said before, Malison, her severity is but a disguise for +mortification and annoyance. Lord St. Eval, the heir of the Malvern +peerage, was too good a chance to be thrown away without vexation. +Caroline was a silly fool to act as she did, I must say that for her, +grateful as I ought to be for the assistance that foolish act has given +me. As for rejecting him merely for love of Alphingham, it is a complete +farce. She no more loves the Viscount than I do; perhaps not so much. I +make her believe she does, and so I intend to do till my plan is fully +accomplished; but love him as she would have done, as in all +probability, at the present moment, she loves Lord St. Eval, she does +not and never will. I shall make a fashionable pair, but not a love +match, Malison, believe me." + +"That Mrs. Hamilton may have the exquisite pleasure of seeing her +daughter like other people, however different she may choose to be +herself; you will rather do her a kindness than an injury, my dear Miss +Grahame." + +"Fortunately for my purpose, she will not think so. I shall, through +Caroline, inflict a deeper wound than I ever thought to have done. No +other injury would have touched her; she prides herself on Christian +forbearance and patience, and such like, which, simply translated, would +be found to be nothing but haughtiness and pride, and utter +insensibility to human feelings; but if Caroline goes wrong, elopes, +perhaps, as her aunt did, disregards parental commands, and acts in the +weighty affair of matrimony for herself, why that will be something like +a triumph for my diplomatic schemes." + +"You must work well on Caroline's mind to produce such a consummation," +observed Miss Malison. "I doubt much whether she would ever act in a +manner that she would believe so contrary to her duty. I would advise +you never to give her time to reflect." + +"I never mean to do so. If the silly girl had ever reflected at all, she +would at once have known that she loved St. Eval and not Lord +Alphingham; that her mother is her truest friend, and not Annie Grahame; +but as she chooses to remain so stupidly blind and trusting, why I see +no harm in playing my part, and as for her consenting, let her but hear +the honourable Viscount's sweet persuasive eloquence and look on his +handsome and pleading features, and consent will quickly be obtained." + +"But why should he not demand her at once of her father? Mr. Hamilton is +always friendly with him when they meet." + +"You have just hit the mark, _ma chère_. That very truth was always a +stumbling block in my machinations, for I almost feared, by Mr. +Hamilton's manner towards him, that the interesting tales concerning his +youth, which I had intended should be poured into his wife's ear, might +be disregarded; such from the first had been my intention, but I have +felt puzzled in a degree how to set about it." + +"Nay, you do yourself injury, my dearest Miss Grahame," observed the +ex-governess, officiously. "From your earliest years you were never +puzzled at anything." + +"My wits deserted me then for the moment," replied Annie, laughing, "and +would perhaps have returned when my plot was ripe for execution; but I +am happy to say I can dispense with their assistance, as I have received +it most effectually from a member of Mr. Hamilton's own family." + +"How!" exclaimed Miss Malison, much astonished. + +"Even so, _ma chère_; and now we come to the important intelligence +Caroline brought me this morning. It appears, that last week Mr. +Hamilton received a letter from Percy, which by her account must have +contained some mysterious warning against this very Lord Alphingham, +that his attentions to Caroline had been not only remarked, but reported +to him, and conjuring his father, as he valued Caroline's future peace, +to dismiss him at once and peremptorily. Thus much Mr. Hamilton imparted +to his daughter, a few days after the receipt of this letter, and after +bestowing some little approbation on her conduct towards him, which you +know before her parents is always particularly cold and guarded, he +requested, or rather desired, that she would gradually withdraw herself +entirely from his society, as he had received quite sufficient +confirmation of that letter to render him anxious to break off all +further communication and acquaintance with him. Caroline is such a +simpleton, I wonder she could prevent her countenance from betraying her +as he spoke; but I suppose she did, for Mr. Hamilton expressed himself +satisfied by her assurance that his wishes should not be forgotten. +Whether this letter contains other and more explicit matter she does not +know, but her state of mind at present is miserable enough to touch any +heart that is not quite so steeled as mine. I could almost smile at her +fond belief that she really loves him, for I see my own work, no tender +passion as she imagines; and to break off all intercourse with him +appears comparative torture. I have already convinced her of her +father's injustice and cruelty in acting thus capriciously towards one +so well known and so universally honoured, and merely from a mysterious +and unsatisfactory letter from a boy who knows nothing about the matter. +I hinted very broadly that it was only because her parents were provoked +at her rejection of St. Eval; and as they still had a lingering hope he +would return, they did not choose her to receive attentions from any one +else. I saw her eyes flash and her cheek crimson with indignation +against all who had thus injured her; and she declared with more +vehemence than I expected, that neither father nor mother, nor Percy, +should prevent her choosing a husband for herself. A violent burst of +tears succeeded this speech; but I continued to soothe and console her, +and she left me with a spirit vowed and determined to free herself from +such galling tyranny. And what do you think had been her mood when she +first came to me?" + +Miss Malison, as expected, expressed ignorance. + +"Why, the weak simpleton thought of confessing her whole tale of love to +her mother, and imploring comfort and assistance." + +"Take care she does not do so still," remarked Miss Malison. + +"Not she. I have proved too clearly how ridiculous and miserable she +would make herself by such a _dénouement_. Her mother, I said, instead +of pitying, would assuredly condemn her for all the past, and most +probably convey her at once to Oakwood, and immure her there till Lord +St. Eval came to release her. She was both terrified and indignant at +the idea." + +"No wonder she should be; but do you know if she or her father have seen +Lord Alphingham since the arrival of this letter?" + +"But once, last night; and it was the fancied anguish felt for his +distress, which she was unable, as usual, to soothe, in consequence of +the keen _surveillance_ of her mother, that brought her here this +morning to tell me all. Mr. Hamilton was still courteous, but more +distant. I have convinced her, that as her parents no longer treat her +with confidence, she has no right to treat them with any; and as every +one knows the worthy character of the Viscount, she can be doing nothing +wrong in proving to him that her feelings in his favour are unchanged. +She has hinted to me to explain the situation in which she is placed, +but _entre nous_, I mean to do no such thing, for I have a plan of my +own to follow up. She is not aware how very intimate I am with the +Viscount, and how much he confides in me; all my persuasions will tend +to urge him to ask her of her father, and I am sure nothing can be more +honourable than that course of action." + +"Nothing, I am sure," echoed the conscientious confidant; "but how will +that assist your former scheme?" + +"Most admirably. Mr. Hamilton will, of course, decidedly refuse his +consent, without even consulting his daughter; the anger of Lord +Alphingham will be overpowering; rage against the father, and love for +the daughter will urge him to any and every means to obtain her hand. +Caroline's indignation against her father for acting in this way and +treating her so much like a child, feelings which I shall take care to +create and foster, will second his eloquence, and I feel quite certain +that next season Caroline Hamilton mingles in the most fashionable +circles as the Viscountess Alphingham; and to obtain such a triumphant +end, in my opinion, no means are faulty." + +"Most assuredly not. Not only the young lady herself, but her whole +family ought to be eternally grateful, for without such manoeuvring I +doubt much whether the perfect daughter or the self-satisfied mother +would obtain an establishment in all things so desirable. Enraged as she +will be at first at such unexpected conduct in the child she has so +ill-treated, she will thank you in the end, Miss Grahame, depend upon +it." + +"If I thought so, Malison, on my honour, I should feel disinclined to +proceed one step further in the business. Give her cause to thank me, +feel that I have unwittingly been of service to her whom of her whole +sex I hate the most, to one who from my earliest years I know regarded +me with aversion and contempt; Malison, I would draw back on the instant +did I think so. But no, it will not, it shall not be; the life of her +child as Countess of Alphingham will not be such as to bring peace to +Mrs. Hamilton's heart: to some mothers it might, but not to hers. She +shall behold in this marriage the complete failure of her plans, the +utter wreck of all her exclusive notions; she shall see that her +pretended goodness and Christian example are not exemplified in Caroline +at least. She shall feel my power--aye, bitterly. Thus will I +triumph--in Caroline's disobedience will I be avenged for the contempt +and dislike her mother has ever shown to me." + +She suddenly raised her slight figure to its full height, and looked on +her companion with a countenance expressive of such malignant triumph, +that all, save her companion in iniquity, must have shuddered as they +beheld such youthful features so deformed. Some other conversation +passed between her and her able confidant, but as little more was said +on the subject most interesting to us, we will not follow them further. +Annie's evil schemes are already too clearly displayed; her mind unable, +as Miss Malison's, to comprehend the exalted nature of Mrs. Hamilton's +character, looked upon it with detestation; the more so, as feeling she +was ever _acting_--she believed it hypocrisy; that the worth for which +even those who visited her not gave her credit, was not her real +character, but an artful veil to conceal evil qualities. The quick +penetration of Miss Grahame had even in childhood discovered that she +was no favourite, and accustomed to be spoiled and flattered by all with +whom she associated, her indignation and dislike towards the only one +who would dare treat her differently, look on her as a mere child, +rendered ridiculous by affectation, increased with her years. She soon +discovered the influence she possessed over Caroline, and on that, +knowing also her faults, she determined to work, and thus effectually +destroy the peace of a mother devoted to her children, and prove to the +world that the eccentric seclusion of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton for their +children's benefit was productive of no more good, if as much as the +plain and in her eyes only useful plan of fashionable education. + +In her first scheme she had already succeeded more than she was perhaps +conscious. The affair of St. Eval had clearly and painfully proved to +Mr. Hamilton that the fears of his wife the night of Caroline's +introduction--those anxious fears, were indeed well founded. She had +sunk beneath temptation; integrity and honour, and every better feeling +had been overcome by that inordinate love of power which her mother from +the first had seen and dreaded. The father's heart was pained and +disappointed, not only in this, but that his Caroline now was not the +same as she had been at Oakwood. A change had come over her, and +darkening her spirit, rendered her conduct at home gloomy, distrustful, +and uneasy; the irritability of her childhood had returned, her very +conversation appeared restrained, and since the departure of Lord St. +Eval, her cheek had become pale, and her eye no longer sparkling; and +only in the excitement of society her parents beheld her as formerly. +Mr. Hamilton was deeply grieved, but he knew not, guessed not the extent +of his wife's anguish. She saw every foreboding fear fulfilled; the +confidence of her child was entirely withheld from her; the coldness +with which she felt compelled to treat her disregard of her wishes had, +she felt assured, completely alienated her affection. Caroline could no +longer love her; every week, every day proved, by a hundred minute +circumstances, her affection was fleeting, and her mother despairingly +felt, never to return; and yet she had but done her duty, exercised her +natural authority to lead her erring child in the better way. Her firm +unshrinking discipline in childhood had only bound the cords of +affection between herself and her offspring more firmly together; but +now in the case of Caroline it appeared about to snap them asunder. Her +fond heart yearned constantly towards her daughter, but she would not +give way, for the sake of Emmeline and Ellen, whose efforts vied with +each other to increase the comfort and happiness of her they so dearly +loved. Their affection, their confidence would not change--no, however +her authority might interfere with their wishes; and should she become +repining and gloomy, because there was one source of sorrow amidst so +many blessings? her pious heart struggled for submission, and obtained +it. But Caroline guessed not the deep pang she had inflicted; she knew +not the many tears shed in secret, the many inward prayers offered up +for her, that however severe was her chastening, it might be blessed, +and bring her back to the deserted fold, to the bosom of her mother. She +knew not this, nor was Annie conscious how fearfully her plans had +succeeded in inflicting pain. + +The very cheerfulness of Mrs. Hamilton, striven for as it was, the +unwavering kindness of her manner towards Emmeline and Ellen, increased +the irritability of Caroline, and with it her indignation at her +mother's coldness and severity towards herself. She felt she was indeed +a slave, and longed to throw aside that galling bondage. What right had +her mother to treat her thus? Why must her every action be controlled, +her very friendship disapproved of? She felt she was the injured one, +and therefore allowed herself no thought for her whom she in truth had +injured. For the same reason she clung yet closer to Annie; in her +alone, in her present state of mind, she found full sympathy, and yet +even with her she was not happy; there was a strange indefinable +sensation in her heart that even to her friend she could not express. +There was a void within, a deep yearning void, which tortured her in her +solitary moments, which even the society of Lord Alphingham could not +wholly remove. In solitude she blindly taught herself to believe that +void must be for him. How far she erred a future page must tell. + +Her conduct in society meanwhile, since the departure of St. Eval, had +been guarded and reserved, and her parents, fondly trusting their +displeasure had been of service, relaxed after the first fortnight in +their coldness and mistrustful manner towards her. Mrs. Hamilton had +hoped the pale cheek and dim eye proceeded from remorse; and had not +Caroline been so pointedly distant and reserved when in her society, she +would have lavished on her all the tenderness of former years. + +When that mysterious letter from Percy came, although it caused his +parents considerable anxiety, yet it never once occurred that any +coldness on their part towards Lord Alphingham could occasion Caroline +any pain. Percy wrote with a degree of eloquent earnestness that could +not be resisted, and guarded as his information and caution was, Mr. +Hamilton determined implicitly to abide by it. The young man wrote what +Annie had informed Miss Malison; that he had heard from more than one +quarter of Lord Alphingham's marked attentions to his sister, that he +had even been congratulated on the brilliant alliance Caroline was about +to make. He did not, he could not believe that such was the case, he +said, for he should then have heard it from his parents, but he conjured +his father, however casual the Viscount's attentions might be, to +withdraw Caroline entirely from them. + +"I know well," he wrote. "Father, as you value my sister's future peace, +expose her not to his many fascinations. If he has endeavoured to win +her heart, if he has paid her marked attentions, he is a villain! I dare +not be more explicit, I am pledged to silence, and only to you, my dear +father, and on such an emergency, am I privileged to write thus much. +Desire Caroline to give him no more encouragement, however slight; but +do not tell even this, it may not only alarm her, but be imparted +perhaps to her friend, as young ladies are fond of doing. You have once +said I never deceived you; father, trust me now, this is no jest; my +sister's happiness is too dear to me. Break off all connection with Lord +Alphingham. I give no credit to the rumours I have heard, for your +letters this season bade me hope Lord St. Eval would have been my +sister's choice. His departure from England has dispelled these visions; +but yet Caroline's affections cannot have been given to Lord Alphingham +without your or my mother's knowledge. Again I implore you, associate no +more with him, he is not worthy of my father's friendship." + +Mysterious as this was, yet both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton knew Percy too +well to imagine he would write thus without strong cause. The suspicions +and almost unconscious prejudice entertained towards him by Mrs. +Hamilton received confirmation by this letter, and she was pleased that +her husband determined no longer to encourage his intimacy. Percy wrote, +if he had paid Caroline marked attentions, or endeavoured to win her +heart, he was a villain, and he had done so, and Mrs. Hamilton could not +but feel sufficiently rejoiced at Caroline's apparent manner towards +him. Deceived as she had been, yet that her once honourable child should +so entirely forget the principles of her childhood, as to give him +secret encouragement, while her conduct in society rather bespoke +indifference and pride than pleasure, that Caroline could have been led +to act thus was a thing so morally impossible to Mrs. Hamilton, that she +had no hesitation whatever in complying with Percy's request, little +imagining that in doing so she placed an inseparable bar to her +regaining the confidence of her child, and widened more painfully the +breach between them. + +Caroline's heart, on receiving her father's command to withdraw herself +by degrees entirely from Lord Alphingham, was wrung with many bitter and +contending feelings. At first she reproached herself for having thus +completely concealed her feelings, and, had she followed the impulse of +nature, she would at once have thrown herself on her mother's neck, and +there confessed all, that she loved him; that she had long done so, and +implore her not to check their intercourse without some more explicit +reason: but Annie's evil influence had been too powerful. She dreaded +her reproaches on this want of confidence in herself, or what was still +worse, her satirical smile at her ridiculous weakness, and then she +remembered her mother's displeasure at her former conduct, and dreaded a +renewal of the same coldness, perhaps even increased control. She +determined, therefore, to wait till she had seen Annie; and that +interview rendered her more miserable, excited still more her +indignation against her parents and brother, and strengthened the +feelings of devoted affection with which she fancied she regarded Lord +Alphingham. Annie's continued notes confirmed these feelings; under the +specious intention of soothing Caroline's wounded pride, it was very +easy for her to disguise her repeated insinuations of Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton's injustice and caprice towards the Viscount, and tyranny +towards herself. The veil she had thrown over Caroline's sober judgment +became thicker and more blinding, and Caroline could sometimes scarcely +restrain even before her parents the indignation which so continually +filled her heart. + +Mrs. Hamilton was ignorant of the communications that were so constantly +passing between Annie and her daughter, or she might perhaps have put a +stop to them. Caroline's own maid, Fanny, had been persuaded to become +the means of receiving and sending their intelligence in secret. The +conscience of the girl reproached her more than once, but the idea was +so improbable that Miss Caroline could act improperly, that she +continued faithful to her wishes, even against her better judgment. + +Lord Alphingham's ready penetration was puzzled at the change of manner +in both Mr. Hamilton and his daughter. The latter, he could easily +perceive, was constrained to act thus, and his determination to release +her from such thraldom became more strongly fixed within him. He became +as cold and reserved to her father as Mr. Hamilton had been to him; but +his silent yet despairing glances ever turned towards Caroline, were, he +felt assured, quite enough to rivet his influence more closely around +her. The following morning, as Annie had expected, the Viscount sought +her to give vent to his fears about Caroline; his indignation against +the unaccountable alteration in Mr. Hamilton's manner. What could have +caused it? He had ever acted honourably and nobly, openly marked his +preference, and he had talked himself into a passion, before his +companion offered to give him any advice or speak any comfort. + +"They are either determined their daughter shall not marry whom she +likes, in revenge for her not accepting whom they selected, or they are +resolved, by this studied display of coldness, to bring you to a point, +so I advise you to speak to this stern capricious father at once." + +"And what good will that do?" + +"A great deal, if you manoeuvre properly, on which quality you +fortunately require no lessons from me. You will, at least, discover Mr. +Hamilton's intentions. If he receive you, well and good, you should be +flattered at his condescension; if the contrary, you will, at least, +know on what ground you stand, and the situation in which my poor friend +must be placed. She is worried to death with the continual caprices of +mamma and papa. It would be a charity in any one to break the chains in +which she is held. She came to me yesterday in the deepest distress, and +all from caprice; for what else can it be that has changed Mr. +Hamilton's manner?" + +Lord Alphingham's fancy became more and more warmed as she spoke; vanity +and self-love were alike gratified, and he answered eagerly-- + +"I may depend, then, on her affections; she will not, for fear of mamma, +play me false." + +"Not she; that is to say, if you do not betray her in your eagerness to +ask her of her father. You have never yet asked the question, though you +have discovered she loves you; but if, in demanding her of her father, +you say you have gained her affections, the consequence will be, if Mr. +Hamilton refuse her, she will be borne instantly to Oakwood, and there +imprisoned, till the poor girl pines and droops like a chained bird +without hope of freedom. Whereas, if you will only govern your impetuous +temper, and trust to her affections and my friendship, your every wish +may be gratified, with or without Mr. Hamilton's advice." + +"And you will assist us;--adorable girl! how can we ever repay you?" he +exclaimed, raising her hand passionately to his lips. The cheek of Annie +suddenly blanched, but a cold, proud smile curled her lip. She answered +him in his own spirit, and after a prolonged interview, the Viscount +departed to act on her advice. + +Ere that day closed, Lord Alphingham had sought, Mr. Hamilton, and with +every demonstration of respectful yet passionate affection, solicited +his consent to address his daughter. The warning of his son, the strong +term he had used, were engraved on Mr. Hamilton's mind, and scarcely +could he answer the Viscount with his accustomed calmness. Politely but +decidedly he refused, adding, that he had hoped the constant reserve of +Caroline's manner would at once have convinced him of her feelings, and +spared him the pain of refusing for her the honourable alliance Lord +Alphingham proposed. A haughty and somewhat triumphant smile played for +a second on the Viscount's lips, but Mr. Hamilton understood not its +import; and his companion, with many expressions of wounded feeling and +injured honour, departed, leaving Mr. Hamilton rather pleased than +otherwise at this affair, as it gave him a plausible excuse for +withdrawing entirely from his society. He imparted what had passed to +his wife, and both agreed it was better for Caroline to say nothing of +his proposals; and this determination, for once, was not thwarted by +Annie, who thought it better for Lord Alphingham to plead his own cause +at some future time when the idea of his having been refused without +consulting her, the person principally concerned, would excite yet +greater indignation toward her parents, and assist effectually the cause +of her lover, who, leaving town for a week or two to prove to Mr. +Hamilton his wounded feelings were no pretence, or for some other +reason, left to Annie the charge of preparing Caroline's mind for the +alternative he might propose. + +A circumstance happened about this time, which appeared greatly to +favour the schemes of Annie and Lord Alphingham, and expose Caroline +more powerfully to temptation. The Duchess of Rothbury had invited a +select number of friends to while away the remaining weeks of the London +season at her elegant seat, which was situated in a lovely spot, about +twenty miles from the metropolis. Amongst the number she, of course, +included Mrs. Hamilton, and expressed herself very much disappointed +when that lady tendered excuses. Mr. Hamilton could not leave town; he +had put Mr. Myrvin's case into the hands of an able solicitor, and +wished to remain on the spot himself to urge on the business, that it +might be completed before he returned to Oakwood. It was not likely, he +said, that the affair would occupy much time, the whole circumstance +being directly illegal. It had only been the age and poverty, combined +with the shrinking sensitiveness from public gaze, which had prevented +Mr. Myrvin from coming forward at the very first against his persecutor. +A specious tale had been brought forward to excuse the illegality, and +impose on the bishop in whose diocese Llangwillan was situated, and +Myrvin, though he could meet trials with resignation, was too +broken-hearted to resist them. Thus much Mr. Hamilton had learned from +Arthur, to whom he wrote himself, requesting him to give a minute +account of the whole circumstance. His earnestness, seconded by the +entreaties of both his sons, succeeded in banishing Arthur's proud +reserve, and Mr. Hamilton was now engaged heart and soul in his +benevolent scheme of exposing iniquity, and restoring the injured +clergyman to his grieving flock. He could not, therefore, leave London, +and Mrs. Hamilton who, for mere amusement, could not bear to part from +her children, for only Caroline was to accompany her, steadily resisted +the entreaties of her friend. For herself she was firm, but she +hesitated when the Duchess, seconded by her daughters, requested most +persuadingly, that if she would not come herself, she would, at least, +permit Caroline to join them. + +"You have known me so long, that I have the vanity to believe, that if I +promise to guard your child as if she were my own, you will trust her +with me," her grace urged, with a pertinacity that could not fail to be +flattering. "She will be as safe under my care as were she under the +observance of her mother." + +"That I do not doubt one moment," replied Mrs. Hamilton, earnestly; "if +I hesitated, it was from no doubt of either your grace's care or +kindness. If Caroline be willing to accept your invitation, and her +father consent, she has my permission." + +"Thank you, my good friend; I trusted in my eloquence to prevail," the +Duchess said, smiling with an air of sincerity that gratified Mrs. +Hamilton; and she quickly imparted to Caroline the accepted invitation, +but in vain endeavoured to read on the face of her child whether she +were pleased or otherwise. Circumstances which caused Mrs. Hamilton +rather to rejoice at Caroline's absence from London for a time, were to +the latter great preventives to the enjoyment to which, in such elegant +society, she might otherwise have looked forward. Annie Grahame was, +much to her own vexation, excluded from this select circle. The Duchess +had penetrated her designing character, and regarded her with a +prejudice, as violent as was her nature. She was only invited to those +large assemblies which included all her acquaintances, not merely her +friends. Amazed at this slight, Miss Grahame at once determined that +there the catastrophe for which she had so long planned should take +place, and her detestation of Mrs. Hamilton be gratified to the +uttermost. + +Would Lord Alphingham be there, was a question that crossed Caroline's +mind repeatedly, and was as often demanded of her friend. Annie either +would not or could not tell; and she would add, perhaps she ought to +congratulate Caroline on her separation from him, as such a dread +mandate had gone from her parent, and she surely would not wish to +encourage his society; and then she would implore her forgiveness, and +sympathise so well in her fancied distress, and describe that of Lord +Alphingham in such heightened colours, that Caroline, unsophisticated as +in some things she still was, felt truly miserable. The Viscount's +sudden departure from town would have been unaccountable, had not Annie +succeeded in persuading her that she was sure it was entirely owing to +her (Caroline's) coldness and Mr. Hamilton's unaccountable conduct. + +Mr. Hamilton did not at first approve of his daughter leaving home +without her mother, even to visit the Duchess of Rothbury, but he +yielded to the solicitations of his wife. They knew that Lord Alphingham +was somewhat of a favourite with the Duke, but felt so assured that the +heart of their child was entirely disengaged, at least to him, that on +his account they did not hesitate. Caroline's conduct with regard to St. +Eval had, they were convinced, proceeded from the pure love of coquetry; +they could not believe she had rejected him because she fancied she +loved another, they had had no cause to do so: and since Mrs. Hamilton +had spoken so seriously on the subject, Caroline's behaviour in public +had been such as to excite their approbation, and renew, in some +measure, their confidence in her integrity. She was more reserved, and +her manner to the Viscount, when they chanced to meet, had led them +trustingly to believe their commands on this head would be implicitly +obeyed. Perhaps Mrs. Hamilton's penetration had played her false; it was +strange that a mother so long accustomed to divine the thoughts and +feelings of her children, should have been thus blind to the emotions +with which Caroline believed she regarded Lord Alphingham. But, surely, +no farther proof than this was wanting to clearly demonstrate it was not +true love she felt; had it been that real, pure, fervid passion, could +one so unused to art have concealed the flushing cheek, the sparkling +eye, the trembling voice, which would invariably have betrayed her? No; +it was infatuation,--blind, maddening infatuation,--strengthened by +indignation towards her parents; by the wish to prove she could throw +off their control, and choose for herself, and love whom and where and +how she liked, without their choice and sympathy; and it was thus she +completely veiled her feelings. Can we condemn her mother for refusing +to believe the child she had trained and watched, and prayed for so +long, such an adept in deceit? Can we blame her want of penetration in +this instance, and think it unnatural in her character, when we remember +how completely the character of her child was changed? Surely not. It +would have been stranger had she, without proof, believed Caroline the +girl she had really become. + +The reflection that she could still write to Annie and hear from her, +consoled her for the temporary separation; and she joined the Duchess +with some degree of pleasure, which had, however, been slightly alloyed +by a conversation with her mother before she left home. Her spirit was +in too excitable a state to hear advice calmly. Every word Mrs. Hamilton +so gently said on her conduct being more guarded now than when under her +eye, her mild entreaties that for her sake Caroline would behave with +reserve, all fell on a poisoned ear. Sullenly she listened, and when her +mother bade her farewell, it was with a heart grieving bitterly. While +smarting under supposed injuries, how little did Caroline imagine the +real agony she inflicted on her mother. If the gentle heart of Mrs. +Hamilton had been wrung by the wayward conduct of her sister, how much +more so must it have been wounded, when she saw so many of those evil +qualities reflected in her child. + +At Airslie, so the residence of the Duchess of Rothbury was called, +Caroline found herself universally courted. She knew she was admired, +and she was flattered; but there was a ceaseless gnawing at her heart, +which not even gratified vanity could still. She knew not, would not +know, it was remorse. She believed it was the conduct of her parents; +the chain that was thrown round her actions, her disappointment with +regard to Lord Alphingham; for he was not, as in secret she hoped, he +would be, one of the invited guests. It was a task, a painful task, to +write home, but she forced herself to speak of the scenes around, and +sketch, with a masterly hand, some of the characters with whom she +mingled; and her parents strove to be satisfied, though there was +somewhat wanting in those letters which, when Caroline had been from +home, they had never missed before. + +"So that man of learning, that marvellous prodigy, that walking +cyclopaedia, Lord St. Eval, has absolutely deserted us, to bury himself +in Italy or Switzerland. Miss Hamilton, can you explain so wonderful and +puzzling an enigma?" mischievously demanded Lord Henry D'Este, one day, +as he found himself alone near Caroline. His friend's departure had +indeed been to him a riddle, and believing at length that it must have +originated in her caprice, he determined, whenever he had an +opportunity, to revenge St. Eval by doing all in his power to torment +her. A deep blush overspread Caroline's cheeks as he spoke, for except +that Mary Greville's letters had mentioned him, he was never spoken of +at home. + +"It ought not to appear a very puzzling riddle to you," she answered +quickly. "He has gone, I should imagine, to collect fresh matters for +reflection, that he may better deserve the title you have bestowed upon +him." + +"Nay, nay, surely he has enough of such matters to form four and twenty +good folio volumes," answered Lord Henry, laughing. "The art of +politeness he certainly has failed to retain, for you can have no idea +what a _brusque_ philosopher he is. I assure you, he terrified me the +last time I saw him. What your honourable father had done to him I know +not, but I met him just coming from Berkeley Square, and all the charms +he had lately invited around him had suddenly departed, he was a +different man, and that day, in a fit, I suppose, of spleen, he quits +London, and the next time I hear of him he is in Geneva: that noble Lord +is one of the strangest creatures I ever had the honour to know. +However, perhaps he has visited the Continent to learn politeness, and I +think he may chance to learn a lesson of love also. Not at all unlikely, +by the praises he bestows in his letters on a certain Louisa Manvers." + +In vain Caroline struggled to prevent a start, or her cheek from +suddenly paling. "Louisa Manvers," she repeated, almost unconsciously. + +"Yes, do you know her? by the bye, she must be some distant connection +of yours, I fancy; her brother is Lord Delmont, he inherited the title +from your maternal grandfather. St. Eval and Delmont were college chums, +and, though they are parted, retain all the romantic enthusiasm of +friendship. After spending some little time with your friends I believe, +at Geneva, the lone pilgrim bent his steps to Lago Guardia, and there he +has remained, wooing nature with his friend, and in all probability +playing the _dévoué_ to Miss Manvers. We shall find Lord St. Eval +bringing home a fair Italian bride, before we are aware of it; that is +to say, if she will have the courage to pore through the deep and hidden +treasures of this volume, till she comes to the magic word heart." + +He might have continued, for Caroline, buried in her own miserable +thoughts, interrupted him not. Had she encountered the eyes of Lord +Henry, as they were fixed full of mischief upon her, she might have made +some effort to rouse herself, but as it was, she felt relieved and glad +when their _tête-à-tête_ was interrupted by the entrance of a merry +group, just returned in the highest spirits from exploring a thick and +mazy wood in the vicinity of the extensive grounds. + +"Good news for you all," exclaimed the Duke of Rothbury, entering +directly after; "we are to have another guest to-day, to keep us all +alive." + +"Who--who?" was reiterated by many voices, with somewhat of the noisy +mirth of children. + +"No less a person than Viscount Alphingham." An exclamation of pleasure +passed through the giddy crowd, but there was an expression in the +countenance of the Duchess, who had also entered from a drive, which, to +Caroline's quickly awakened fancy, appeared contrary to the general +emotion. "He is engaged as Sir Walter Courtenay's guest, so I cannot +claim him as mine," the Duke continued; "but that does not much signify. +Sir Walter is here every day, and Alphingham will of course accompany +him. He is the best fellow I know." + +"And this is the man papa, for no reason whatever, save from Percy's +ill-natured opinion, has desired me to slight, to behave in a manner +that, contrasted with former notice, must be madness itself; cruelty to +him, after what has passed between us, and misery to me. Surely, in such +a case as this I am not compelled to obey. When the general voice +proclaims him other than they believe, am I to regard what is in itself +a mystery? If Percy had good reasons for writing against him to papa, +for I am sure he must have done so, why did he not explain them, instead +of treating me thus like a child, and standing forward as his accuser, +when the whole world extols him? Why are the dearest wishes of my heart +to be destroyed merely by caprice? Percy ever tried, even in childhood, +to bid me to look up to him, and acknowledge his power, and thus he +would prove it; but he will find himself mistaken. When papa permits his +judgment to be blinded by the insinuations of a mere boy, I no longer +consider myself bound to obey him." + +Such was the tenor of Caroline's thoughts when alone, in the short +interval, ere she descended to dinner--there was no ray of happiness; +her heart had that day received a wound, nor could she derive comfort +even from the knowledge that Lord Alphingham was expected. She would not +permit herself to think on Lord Henry's conversation. What was it to her +if St. Eval married Louisa Manvers? then studiously she thought only on +the Viscount, and the situation with regard to him in which she was +placed, till her head ached with the intensity of its reflections. + +On entering the drawing-room she found, as she had anticipated, Lord +Alphingham the centre of a brilliant coterie, and for the space of a +minute her heart throbbed and her cheek flushed. He bowed respectfully +as she appeared, but with distant courtesy; yet she fancied the flow of +his eloquence was for a moment arrested, and his glance, subdued yet so +mournfully beseeching, spoke volumes. Neither at dinner nor during the +whole of that evening did he pay her more than ordinary attention; +scarcely that. But those silent signals of intelligence had even greater +power than words; for they nattered her self-love, by clearly proving, +that courted, admired, as he could not but feel he was by all around +him, his noble hostess perhaps excepted, yet all was as nothing, now +that her favour had been so strangely and suddenly withdrawn. His tone, +his manner, as he presented to her a note from Annie, of which he had +been the bearer, strengthened this illusion; and Caroline, as she +retired to rest, felt more and more convinced they were indeed mutually +and devotedly attached, and that her obedience to her parents could not +weigh against the duty she owed herself, the love he had evinced for +her. Annie's note strengthened this determination. + +"I give you joy, my dear Caroline," she wrote, "on the opportunity you +will now enjoy of receiving Lord Alphingham's attentions, undisturbed by +any of those wayward fancies which have lately so destroyed your peace. +Do not, for heaven's sake, by squeamish notions of filial obedience and +dutiful conduct--which I do assure you have been very long out of +date--destroy your own happiness. When parents cease to care for the +true welfare and felicity of their children, it becomes our positive +duty to care for them ourselves. Mr. Hamilton has given you no reason +for his command to withdraw yourself from the attentions of Lord +Alphingham; and surely that is the clearest imaginable proof that he +really has none to give, and that it is merely to gratify his own unjust +displeasure at your rejection of St. Eval, as if in such matters you had +not an undoubted right to decide for yourself. He cannot suppose that +you will now be contented with that which completely crosses your own +wishes, merely because he desires it. That was all very well in your +childhood, but at present, when your own reason must be satisfied, he +has no right to expect obedience. The whole conduct of your parents, you +have owned to me yourself, has been lately such as to alienate your +affection and confidence. They hold your will enchained, my poor friend; +and if you have not the spirit to break it, now a fair opportunity +occurs, forgive me, if I say I can no longer offer you consolation. Lord +Alphingham loves you, and long ere this, had it not been for your +mother's extraordinary conduct, would have proposed, and you might have +been now a plighted bride, or still happier wife. I much doubt, by a +few hints he dropped, if his late departure from town was not occasioned +by Mr. Hamilton's positive refusal to sanction his addresses to you. If +he has demanded your hand, and been rejected without your knowledge, +your father and mother have treated you with much confidence and +affection, have they not? Can they, dare they expect to receive yours, +when such is the case? Is it not a clear proof your happiness is not to +be consulted in any marriage you may form? It is ridiculous to imagine +that your mother has penetrated, in some degree, your feelings for +Alphingham, though perhaps not to their extent; and not approving of it, +for no reason whatever, she desires you to shun his society. Your father +refuses a most honourable offer, without even consulting the person +principally concerned. Caroline, my dearest friend, do not permit your +noble spirit to be thus bowed down. Whatever alternative Lord Alphingham +may propose becomes lawful, when you are thus cruelly persecuted. Many +secret marriages are happier, very much happier, than those for which +the consent of parents have been obtained. They think only of ambition, +interest; how can we expect them to enter into the warmth of youthful +feelings? Do not be frightened at my words, but give them a calm, just +deliberation. You have permitted your love for him to be discovered; it +becomes your duty to prove it still more clearly." + +Such were the principal contents of Annie's letter, more than sufficient +to confirm Caroline's already half-adopted resolution, and convince her +wavering judgment that obedience to her parents was now no longer a +duty; their unjust harshness had alienated her from them, and she must +stand forth and act alone. Conscience loudly called on her to desist; +that she was deserting the plain path, and entering the labyrinth of +deceit, but the words of Annie were before her. Again and again they +were read, till every word became engraved within her, and the spirit +they breathed thickened the film before her eyes, and deafened her ear +to every loudly-whispered reproach. Yet in silence and solitude that +still small voice, conscience, arose and left its pang, although on the +instant banished. + +A few days passed, and the conduct of the Viscount to Caroline continued +the same as it had been the first night. Publicly distant, secretly and +silently beseeching, with an eloquence few could have resisted. There +was a grand _fête_ and _déjeûner_ at Airslie, which was pronounced by +the connoisseurs in such things to be the most _recherché_ of the +season. But few, comparatively speaking, were the guests, though some +had ventured to travel twenty miles for the purpose; yet all was +elegant. The day was lovely, and with the bright sunshine and cloudless +sky, added new charms to this fairy land; for so, by the tasteful +arrangement of gorgeous tents, sparkling fountains, exotic shrubs, and +flowers of every form and shade, the _coup d'oeil_ might have been +termed. Musicians were stationed in various parts of the grounds. The +dance was enjoyed with spirit on the greensward, when the heat of the +sun had subsided into the advancing twilight, and the picturesque +groups, the chaste and elegant costumes scattered about, intermixed with +the beauties of inanimate nature, added life and spirit to the picture. + +It was an exciting and yet a soothing scene. Some minds, untouched by +care, would here have revelled in unchecked gladness. In others, it +might have been productive of that soothing melancholy, which, from its +very sweetness, we encourage till it becomes pain: such was the case +with Caroline. Her spirits, buoyed up at first with the hope and +expectation that here at least Lord Alphingham might resume his +attentions unremarked, she had been excited to unwonted gaiety; but as +the hours wore on, and he approached her not, that excitement faded into +melancholy and doubt. Not even had the usual signals of intelligence +passed between them, for he had been sedulously devoting himself to +almost every beautiful girl in the gardens. Jealousy for a moment took +possession of her mind, but that very quickly gave way to indignation +against her father. + +"If he has been treated as Annie tells me, if his proposals for me have +been rejected," she thought, "how can I expect or hope that he will +continue his addresses? He knows not but that I have been consulted, and +is my happiness to be overthrown, rudely cast aside, by the insinuations +of a boy?" and covering her face with her hands, she burst into tears: +the scene, the time, the faint sound of the distant music, encouraged +these feelings, and heightened despondency. Day was darkening around +her, aided by the sombre shade of the gigantic trees, which formed a +grove where she sat, and the music borne along at intervals sounded +unusually mournful. A heavy sigh near her aroused her from her painful +trance, and starting, she beheld the object of her thoughts standing by +her side. His speaking eyes were fixed on her with a glance not the most +obtuse imagination could have misinterpreted, and the whole expression +of his peculiarly handsome features betrayed the most eloquent and +pleading sympathy. + +"Oh, that it might be mine, the blessed privilege of endeavouring to +soothe or to relieve this grief!" he passionately exclaimed, as with an +air of the utmost respect he ventured to take her hand. "I had indulged +in presumptuous hopes. I had ventured to read the flattering notice +which I ever received from you as a confirmation of my wishes, and I +indulged in fondly-cherished visions that ere this I should indeed have +had a right, a holy right, to soothe your every grief and share in every +joy. I thought wrong; your flattering notice must have been but the +impulse of your kind heart, pitying what you could not fail to behold; +and yet, oh, Miss Hamilton, that very demonstration of your gentle +nature has increased my misery; it has bade me love, nay, adore you. I +blame you not. I have been presumptuous--mad. I had no right to expect +so much happiness. My proposals were refused. I was told your conduct +must have made it evident that I was not pleasing to you. I fled from +your presence, but I could not rest alone. Again, like a mad fool, I +have plunged myself in the centre of fascination. I could not exist +without the sound of your voice, though me it might never more address. +I could not live without glancing on your expressive eyes, your eloquent +smile, though on me neither more might beam. I am here, I feel my folly, +but I cannot tear myself away. Caroline, adorable Caroline!" he +continued, with well-practised passion, "only speak, command me; in what +way can I relieve the grief in which I see you plunged? Give me at least +the gratification of feeling I have been of service to you; that I have +done somewhat for your happiness, though by you mine has fled for ever." + +Rapidly yet eloquently had he spoken, and Caroline vainly struggled +with herself to interrupt him. He believed she had rejected him, and in +that moment she contrasted his present conduct with that of Lord St. +Eval, under the same circumstances, and surely she could doubt no longer +which loved her best. She had not seen the secret agony of the one--his +proud and noble heart concealed it; but Alphingham--when such devoted +love was offered her, would she condemn it to misery, and herself to +everlasting reproach, if not to equal woe? + +"You are mistaken, my lord," she said, proudly, after a severe struggle +with herself. "Lay not to my charge the loss of your happiness. I was +not aware till this instant that it depended--" She stopped abruptly, +for the natural modesty of her disposition prevented more, indignant as +she was at the confirmation of Annie's suspicions. + +Lord Alphingham saw his advantage, and pursued it. + +"How!" he exclaimed, in an accent of astonishment and ecstasy well +combined. "Have you too been deceived, and my proposals rejected without +having been laid before you? Can it be possible? Oh, speak again, my +beloved Caroline! tell me I have not been too presuming--that I may hope +that my long-cherished visions are not false. You will not, oh, you will +not condemn me to misery--you will not reject my heart, and send me +despairing from your feet. Caroline, my beloved, my beautiful! say that +you will be merciful--say that you love me--that I love not alone; oh, +say, promise me you will be mine, and come what will we shall be happy." + +She heard, and her heart throbbed and her brain reeled; in the +infatuation of that moment, all, all was forgotten, save the persuasions +of Annie, his pleading eloquence, the wild impulse of her own blinded +fancy; the fatal promise passed her lips--she was pledged to be his own. +A few minutes she listened to his impassioned thanks, his words of +devoted love, then suddenly starting back-- + +"My father!" she exclaimed, and burst into a passionate flood of tears. + +"Nay, weep not, my beloved, my own! let not a mere shadow, for such in +this instance is duty, alloy the felicity that will be ours. His consent +will in time be given; fear not, when he sees you happy, when he sees my +only care, my every thought is for your welfare, that his forgiveness +for involuntary disobedience will be granted, and his unjust and cruel +prejudices against me will pass away, for he will find they were indeed +but fancy; and if he continues obdurate, oh, how rejoiced I shall be to +have withdrawn my Caroline from his stern guardianship. Already has he +deceived you; and can he then expect implicit obedience to unjust and +unfounded commands on your part? Cheer up, my best love, fear not; trust +to my affection, and all will be well." + +But still she wept, even though Lord Alphingham continued this strain of +consolation for some little time longer. Fearing at length to attract +notice by her prolonged absence, she roused herself, and breaking from +her triumphant lover, remained for a few minutes alone, endeavouring, +but vainly, to recover that happiness which, when she had looked to an +union with the Viscount, had promised to dawn around her. She saw it +not; there was a dark, heavy, threatening cloud overhanging her mind, +which no efforts could dispel. She felt, as she rejoined the glittering +circle, the eye of the Duchess was fixed with startling earnestness upon +her, and she shrunk from that severe look, as if indeed it could +penetrate her soul and condemn the past. Why did not enjoyment return? +Why was she not happy when in the centre of a scene like this? She knew +not, and struggled to be gay and animated as usual; but she felt as if +each effort failed, and drew upon her the attention of those near her, +and rejoiced was she indeed when the festive hours had fled, and she was +alone. She strove to compose her troubled thoughts to prayer, but no +words came to her aid, and throwing herself on her bed, she wept for +many weary hours. She could not have told why she thus wept; she only +knew that she was wretched, that the light-heartedness once so +peculiarly her own had fled, it seemed, for ever, and she shrunk almost +in loathing from the hour when she should meet Lord Alphingham again; +and when it came, even his presence cheered her not. He soothed, even +gently reproached, but as he did so there was somewhat in his eye she +had never seen before, and which struck terror. Subdued as it was it +told of passions from which she had believed him exempt, and added +additional pain to her distress. Noticing what she termed the +indisposition of her young friend, the Duchess kindly advised her to +remain quiet, nor join the gay party, till it had passed away; but as +she spoke, Caroline observed the severe and scrutinizing glance of the +Duchess again fixed upon her, and, contrary to her advice, appeared as +usual at dinner. + +Days passed, and Lord Alphingham's plan was matured, and submitted to +Caroline's sanction. A _fête_, similar to that given by the Duchess, +only commencing at a later hour, to permit a superb display of fireworks +on the grounds, was to be given by a neighbouring nobleman, to which all +the members of the Duchess's party were invited. The villa was some few +miles off, and they were to leave Airslie at half-past eight. That day +Caroline was to feign indisposition, and remain undisturbed at home; at +ten Lord Alphingham would dispatch a trusty servant, well disguised, +with a note, apparently from Mrs. Hamilton, requesting her daughter's +immediate return, as she had been taken suddenly and dangerously ill. +This note was, of course, designed to impose upon any member of the +party who might, by some mischance, remain at home, and be circulated +among the servants to account for her sudden departure. The carriage, +said to be Mr. Hamilton's, waited for her; Lord Alphingham was to meet +it at some five miles off; but once within it, once safe from Airslie, +the rest was easy. + +Caroline heard, and an inward shuddering crept chilly through her frame. +Faintly and briefly she agreed to all he so eloquently and persuasively +pleaded, and instantly left him. + +"Will she be weak enough now to waver?" thought Alphingham. "Perhaps, +after all, she is not worthy of all this trouble, there is no spirit in +her; yet she is so beautiful, it will suit me well to introduce such a +lovely creature as my bride next season, and gratify my vengeance on Mr. +Hamilton for his unceremonious refusal, and if I get tired of her, if +then tears and pale cheeks continue, why, thank heaven, no chains with +me are binding. That early folly of mine was not so useless as it +seemed; I may act as I please, and if your daughter sickens or offends +me, Mr. Hamilton, as you have done, you may well dread my vengeance, it +will fall upon you both, and I unscathed will seek other lands and +fairer beauties, as I have already done." His countenance had darkened +during this speech, but at its close it became clear again, and, with a +careless whistle of unconcern, he sauntered away. + +And was it to this man that the cherished child of so much anxiety was +about to sacrifice herself--with him and for him, she, who had once been +the soul of truth and honour, had consented to leave the guardianship of +her father, and break the sacred links of nature? Alas! though her very +spirit now revolted, she had gone too far. How could she, how dared she +draw back? and yet one effort she would make. She would implore him to +permit her to confess all to her parents; she was convinced, did they +know how much her happiness depended on her union with him, they would +consent, and with their blessing hallow their marriage. +Happiness--Caroline shuddered; the wild excitement of secret love had +departed. She knew she was beloved, she had given her promise, yet she +was not happy; and could she then expect to be when irrevocably his own? +Her brain reeled beneath the bewildering chaos of her thoughts; but she +followed up her resolution, and implored him as she had intended. Lord +Alphingham heard with a dark and frowning brow. + +"And what becomes of your kind brother's just accusations?" demanded the +Viscount, with a very evident and contemptuous sneer. + +"Defend yourself, and papa will be convinced they are unfounded," was +her reply. But she gazed on his countenance, and terrified at its +expression, for the first time the thought flashed across her mind, +could there indeed be any real cause for Percy's warning; and more and +more earnestly did she beseech him to say she might implore her father's +sanction. "Only let me confide in papa and mamma, let me try and +convince them they are mistaken, and Percy too must be in error." + +The Viscount for some little time endeavoured mildly to confute her +arguments, and convince her that in doing so, she was only forming her +own misery; but still she pleaded, and ungoverned fury at length burst +forth. He had been too long the victim of passions always to keep them +in bounds, even when most required; and for a few minutes they spurned +restraint, and Caroline beheld him as he was, and saw in dim perspective +the blackened future. She would have broken from him, but he detained +her, and with a rapid transition of mood humbled himself before her, and +with impassioned fervour and deep contrition besought her forgiveness, +her pity. It was his fervid love, his fear of losing her, that bade him +thus forget himself, and he conjured her not to condemn him to +everlasting misery; that he was wretched enough already at having caused +her one moment's pain. He spoke, and his softened voice, his imploring +eyes, his protestations of unalterable love and gratitude, if she would +but trust to his affections, and be his own as he proposed, had in a +degree their effect. She was convinced it would only bring forth misery +now to implore the sanction and blessing of her parents, and promised to +resign all idea of so doing. But vainly she strove to forget that burst +of ungoverned passion she had witnessed; it haunted her sleeping and +waking thoughts, and his protestations of devoted love were dimmed +beside it, they shared its blackened hue. + +The appointed day came, and the Duchess, without question or remark, +accepted Caroline's excuse for not accompanying her and her friends to +the expected _fête_. The heavy eyes and pale cheeks of the misguided +girl were more than sufficient excuse; she even seconded Caroline in +refusing the kind offer of Lady Annie and Lady Lucy Melville to remain +with her. She said she preferred being quite alone, as she was no +companion for any one, and it appeared as if not even that obstacle +would arise to prevent her flight. + +The hours wore on; the noble guests could speak of nothing but the +anticipated _fête_ and its attendant pleasures, while they whiled away +the intervening hours in the library, the music-room, the garden, +wherever their taste dictated, for freedom was ever the password of +Airslie; but Caroline joined them not. It was the second day that she +had not seen the Viscount; for, fearing to attract notice, he had never +made his visits unusually frequent, and well versed in intrigue, he had +carried on his intercourse with Caroline in impenetrable secrecy. More +than once in those lonely hours did she feel as if her brain reeled, and +become confused, for she could not banish thought. She had that morning +received letters from home, and in her present mood each line breathed +affection, which her now awakened conscience told her was undeserved. +Nature and reason had resumed their sway, as if to add their tortures to +the anguish of those hours. The misery which had been her portion, since +her acceptance of Lord Alphingham, had slowly but surely drawn the +blinding film from her eyes. The light of reason had broke upon them +with a lustre that would no more be darkened. At the same moment that +she knew she did not love Lord Alphingham, her conduct to her parents, +to St. Eval, appeared in their true colours. Yes! this was no fancy, she +had been the victim of infatuation, of excitement; but clearer and +clearer dawned the truth. She was sacrificing herself to one whom she +did not love, whom she had never loved, with whom her life would be a +dreary waste; and for this was she about to break the ties of nature, +fly from her parents, perhaps draw down upon her head their curse, or, +what she now felt would be worse, much worse, wring that mother's heart +with anguish, whose conduct, now that reason had resumed her throne, she +was convinced had been ever guided by the dictates of affection. She +recalled with vivid clearness her every interview with Annie, and she +saw with bitter self-reproach her own blindness and folly, in thus +sacrificing her own judgment to false reasoning, in withdrawing her +confidence and affection from the mother who had never once deceived +her, to bestow them on one who had played upon her foolish weakness, +heightened her scarcely-dawning fancy till it became infatuation, and +finally recommended that plan of conduct from which Caroline's whole +soul revolted. Why had she done this? Caroline felt, to bring down shame +upon her head and suffering on her mother. Her parents' conduct changed +towards her--oh! had not hers changed to them? had she not acted from +the first of Annie's arrival in London as if under the influence of some +spell? and now that it was rudely broken, recollections of the past +mingled with and heightened her present sufferings. Her childhood, her +early youth rushed like a torrent on her mind; faulty as they had been, +they were innocent and pure compared with her present self. Then she +had been ever actuated by truth, candour, respectful love, affectionate +confidence towards her parents; now all had been cast aside. If her +mother's words were true, and bitterly she felt they were, that her +conduct to St. Eval had been one continued falsehood, what would her +parents feel when her intercourse with Lord Alphingham was discovered. +Lord Alphingham--she shuddered as his name rose to her lips. Her heart +yearned with passionate intensity towards her mother, to hear her voice +in blessing, to see her beaming smile, and feel her kiss of approbation, +such as at Oakwood she had so often received: she longed in utter +wretchedness for them. That night she was wilfully to cast them off for +ever, flee as a criminal from all she loved; and if she could return +home, confess all, would that confiding love ever be hers again? She +shrunk in trembling terror from her father's sternness, her mother's +look of woe, struggling with severity, the coldness, the displeasure she +would excite--on all sides she beheld but misery; but to fly with Lord +Alphingham, to bind herself for ever with one, whom every passing hour +told her she did not, could not love--oh, all, all, even death itself, +were preferable to that! The words of her brother sounded incessantly in +her ears: "If you value my sister's future peace, let her be withdrawn +from his society." How did she know that those words were wholly without +foundation? the countenance of the Viscount as he had alluded to them +confirmed them to her now awakened eye. Was she about to wed herself to +crime? She remembered the perfect justness, the unwavering charity of +her father, and in those softened moments she felt assured he would not +have condemned him without good cause. Why, oh, why had she thus +committed herself? where was she to turn for succour? where look for aid +to guard her from the fate she had woven for herself? Where, in her +childish faults, had her mother taught her to seek for assistance and +forgiveness? Dare she address her Maker, the God whom, in those months +of infatuated blindness, she had deserted; Him, whom her deception +towards her parents had offended, for she had trampled on His holy laws, +she had honoured them not? + +The hour of seven chimed; three hours more, and her fate was irrevocably +sealed--the God of her youth profaned; for could she ever address Him +again when the wife of Alphingham? from whose lips no word of religion +ever came, whose most simple action had lately evinced contempt for its +forms and restrictions. The beloved guardians of her infant years, the +tender friends of her youth insulted, lowered by her conduct in the +estimation of the world, liable to reproach; their very devotion for so +many years to their children condemned, ridiculed. An inseparable bar +placed between her and the hand-in-hand companions of her youth; never +again should she kneel with them around their parents, and with them +share the fond impressive blessing. Oakwood and its attendant innocence +and joys, had they passed away for ever? She thought on the anguish that +had been her mother's, when in her childhood she had sinned, and what +was she now about to inflict? She saw her bowed down in the depth of +misery; she heard her agonized prayer for mercy on her child. + +"Saviour of my mother, for her sake, have mercy on her unworthy child! +oh, save me from myself, restore me to my mother!" and sinking on her +knees, the wretched girl buried her face in her hands, and minutes, +which to her appeared like hours, rolled on in that wild burst of +repentant and remorseful agony. + + + + +CHAPTER VII. + + +"Dearest mother, this is indeed like some of Oakwood's happy hours," +exclaimed Emmeline, that same evening, as with childish glee she had +placed herself at her mother's feet, and raised her laughing eyes to her +face, with an expression of fond confiding love. + +She and Ellen were sitting alone with Mrs. Hamilton, Miss Harcourt being +engaged at a friend's, and Mr. Hamilton having been summoned after +dinner to a private interview with his solicitor on the Myrvin affairs. + +The lovely evening was slowly wearing on to twilight, and the sky, +shadowed as it was by the towering mansions of Berkeley Square, yet bore +all the rich hues which had attended the repose of a brilliant setting +sun. The balcony of the drawing-room where they were sitting was filled +with, flowers, and the window being thrown widely open, the gentle +breeze of summer filled the room with their sweet fragrance. It was that +hour of evening when even London is somewhat hushed. Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton had been more at home since Caroline's visit to Airslie, but +yet not one evening had so vividly reminded Emmeline of her dear Oakwood +as the present; it was thus in twilight she had often sought her mother, +and given vent, by a thousand little innocent devices, to the warm +emotions that filled her heart. + +Ellen had been standing by the flowers, but on hearing her cousin's +exclamation, she too had established herself on the couch by her aunt, +and added-- + +"You are right, dear Emmeline; it is indeed." + +There was an anxiety on Mrs. Hamilton's heart, which she could not +define; but was yet unable to resist the innocent happiness of her young +companions, and twining her arm playfully round Ellen, she abandoned her +other hand to Emmeline, and answered-- + +"I am very glad, my dear children, that such a simple thing as my +company can afford you so much pleasure." + +"It is so very rare now to have you thus all alone, mamma, can it be +otherwise than delight? I do not even want papa yet, we three make such +a comfortable party." + +"You are exceedingly polite to my uncle, Emmeline. I have a good mind to +tell him when he rejoins us," said Ellen, laughing. + +"Do so, my mischievous cousin, and I shall get a kiss for your pains. I +know where mamma's thoughts are, though she is trying to be as merry as +we are; she wants another to make this Oakwood hour complete." + +"I ought not to wish for your sister, my love, she is happier where she +is than she would be here, particularly to-night, for Lord D-- gives a +splendid _fête_ at his beautiful villa, similar to that given by the +Duchess ten days ago at which I should think Caroline must have been +delighted, though she wrote but little of it." + +"There is a tone in her letters, mamma, that tells me she will be as +pleased as ourselves to be at Oakwood again, though, she may fancy +_fêtes_, assemblies, and a long list of et ceteras, are the most +delightful things in existence; and do you know, mamma, I will not +permit you to say you ought not to wish for her, because she is happier +where she is than she would be here; it is high treason in my presence +to say or even think so." + +"I must plead guilty, then, my Emmeline, and place my case in Ellen's +hands as counsel for the defendant, or throw myself on your mercy." + +"In consideration of the peculiar happiness of this evening, I pronounce +pardon," answered Emmeline, laughing, as she kissed her mother's hand. + +"A letter we received this morning tells us of one who longs to behold +us all again, spite of the many and varied pleasures of his exciting +life, does it not, my dear aunt?" + +"It does indeed, my love. Our Edward's letters have been, ever since he +left us, sources of consolation and delight to me, though I do excite my +Ellen's jealousy at the greater length of his letters to me than of +those to her," she added, smiling. + +"My brother knows if his letters to you impart pleasure and +satisfaction, he cannot bestow greater happiness on me, however short +mine may be," answered Ellen, earnestly; "and when he writes so fully to +you and so fondly to me, I have every reason to be quite contented; his +time is not so much at his own disposal as mine is." + +"I wonder where he can find time to write such lengthy epistles to +mamma," observed the smiling Emmeline. "I peeped over her shoulder this +morning as she was reading, and was astounded to perceive it was +written nearly as closely as mine would be. I wonder how he manages, +sailors are said to be such bad correspondents." + +"Have you forgotten what I used so repeatedly to say to you, when you +were a lazy little girl, Emmeline, and were ever ready to escape +disagreeable tasks, by saying you were quite sure you never could +succeed--Where there's a will there's a way?'" + +"Indeed, I have not forgotten it, dear mamma; it often comes across me +now, when I am ready to despair; and so I shall just read it to Master +Ned when he returns, as a lecture for not writing to me." + +"Nay, Emmeline, that would be demanding too much from our young sailor; +there is moderation in everything, you know." + +"Not in me, mamma," answered Emmeline, laughing. "You know I am always +in extremes, up in the skies one minute, and down, down on the lowest +earth the next. I sometimes wish I was like Ellen, always unruffled, +always calm and collected. You will go through the world better than I +shall, my quiet cousin." + +"Shall I?" replied Ellen, faintly smiling. But Mrs. Hamilton could +perceive that which the thoughtless Emmeline regarded not, a deep +crimson staining apparently with pain the pale fair cheek of her niece, +and she thought not with her daughter. + +"And how much longer does Ned intend being away from us?" demanded +Emmeline, after a long pause. + +"He cannot give us any idea yet," answered her mother; "perhaps some +time next year. They were to cruise off the shores of South America +these autumnal months, and winter, Edward thinks, off Buenos Ayres. He +is pleased at this, as he will see so very much more of the New World +than he expected, when he left us.'" + +"What an entertaining companion he will be when he returns," exclaimed +Emmeline. + +"Or rather ought to be, Emmeline," remarked Ellen, quietly. + +"Now, what an insinuation! Ellen, you are too bad to-night, and against +your brother, of all persons in the world. It is just like the ill +compliment you paid him on his gallantry in saving the Syren and all her +crew--absolutely would not believe that your brother Edward and the +young hero of my tale were one and the same person." + +"I can forgive her scepticism then," said Mrs. Hamilton, affectionately. +"The extraordinary efforts you described were indeed almost beyond +credence, when known to have been those of a lad but just seventeen; but +I hope my Ellen is no longer a sceptic as to the future fame and honour +of her brother," she added, kindly addressing her niece. + +"Oh, I dare not indulge in one half the bright visions, the fond hopes +that will intrude themselves upon my mind for him," exclaimed Ellen, +with involuntary energy. + +"Why, Ellen, are you sometimes a victim to the freaks of imagination as +well as myself?" asked her cousin, laughing. + +"I have frequently compelled myself to seek active employment," answered +Ellen, "lest those hopes should be indeed but fading visions, and my +disappointment more painfully bitter." + +"You do your brother injustice in even fancying disappointment," said +her aunt, playfully, "and I must act as defendant for the absent. I +believe, say, and protest my firm belief, that the name of Edward +Fortescue will stand one of the highest in naval fame, both as a +commander and a man. The naval honour of my family will, I feel assured, +have a worthy representative in my noble nephew, and I will not have one +word breathed in doubt or mistrust on the subject." + +"If you think so, then I may hope indeed," Ellen said with earnestness. +"And the recollection of the past"-- + +"Must heighten anticipations for the future, my dear girl, or I must +sentence them to perpetual banishment. Condemn them never to be +recalled," interrupted Mrs. Hamilton, still more playfully, and then +added-- + +"Emmeline, have you no wish to know how the object of your kind +sympathy, poor Lilla, parted from her father and me to day?" + +"I quite forgot all about it, mamma; this Oakwood hour has made me so +selfish. I thought of no one but ourselves," replied Emmeline. "Gratify +my curiosity now. Did Lady Helen evince any sorrow at the separation?" + +"Not so much as, for Lilla's sake, I could have wished. She has been so +unfortunately prejudiced against her both by Annie and Miss Malison, +that although I am convinced she loves her child, she never will evince +any proof of it; and Lilla's unhappy temperament has, of course, +increased this prejudice, which I fear will require years to remove, +unless Annie be soon married, and Miss Malison removed from Lady +Helen's establishment. Then Lilla's really excellent qualities will +quickly be made evident." + +"Mr. Grahame is already convinced she is a very different girl to that +she has been represented, is he not?" asked Ellen. + +"He is; and I trust, from the awakened knowledge, happiness is dawning +upon them both. I could not see unmoved his struggle to part with her +to-day, brief as the separation will be--scarcely six short months." + +"I was quite sure Mr. Grahame loved his children, though Annie and Cecil +did say so much about his sternness," said Emmeline, somewhat +triumphantly. + +"Mr. Grahame's feelings are naturally the very wannest, but +disappointment in some of his dearest hopes has, in some cases, +unfortunately caused him to veil them; I regret this, both for Cecil and +Lilla's sake, as I think, had he evinced greater interest and affection +for them in their childish years, they might both have been different in +character." + +"But it is not too late now?" + +"I trust not for Lilla, but I greatly fear, from all I have heard, that +Cecil's character is already formed. Terrified at his father's +harshness, he has always shrunk from the idea of making him his friend, +and has associated only with the young men of his mother's family, who, +some few years older than himself, and devoted to fashion, and gay +amusements, are not the very best companions he could have selected, but +whose near relationship seems to have prevented all interference on the +part of Mr. Grahame. Cecil must now be sixteen, and I fear no alteration +in his father's conduct will efface the impressions already received." + +"But, changed as Mr. Grahame is towards Lilla, was it still necessary +for her to go to Mrs. Douglas? Could not her reformation have been +effected equally well at home?" + +"No, my love; her father delighted at finding he had engaged her +affections, and that some of the representations he had heard were +false, would, in all probability, have gone to the contrary extreme, and +indulged her as much, if not more, than he had previously neglected her. +Lilla has very many faults, which require steady yet not harsh +correction, and which from her earliest age demanded the greatest care; +being neglected, they have strengthened with her years. The discipline +she will now be under will at first be irksome, and perhaps Lilla may +find all I have said in Mrs. Douglas's favour very contrary to reality; +but I have such a good opinion of her docility, when reasoned with +kindly, that I do not doubt all such impressions will be effaced when +she visits us at Christmas." + +"Well, however kind Mrs. Douglas may be, I should not like to be in +Lilla's place," observed Emmeline, and then added, with her usual +animation, "Ah, mamma, how can we ever be sufficiently grateful to you +for never sending us from you? I might have loved you very dearly, but I +could not have looked upon you as my best and dearest friend, as I do +now." + +"It is sufficient recompense for all my care that you do look on me +thus, my sweet child," exclaimed Mrs. Hamilton, with involuntary +emotion, and she bent down to impress a kiss on Emmeline's forehead as +she spoke, that she might conceal an unusual tear which had started to +her eye, for the unrestrained confidence and unabated affection of her +younger daughter, while it soothed, yet rendered the conduct of +Caroline by its contrast more painful; and, almost unconsciously, she +added-- + +"Oh, that this confidence and affection may never change, never be +withdrawn." + +"Change!" repeated Emmeline and Ellen at the same moment; but they +checked themselves, for they knew where the thoughts of their much-loved +relative had wandered, and they felt she had indeed sufficient cause for +all her solicitude. Recovering herself almost instantly, Mrs. Hamilton +resumed the conversation in a more cheerful tone, by demanding of +Emmeline if her busy fancy had pictured how Oakwood was to look, on +their return to it in a fortnight's time. + +"She certainly must have done so," answered Ellen, laughing; "for she +has had so many reveries over her drawing and work this week, that +nothing less important could have occasioned them." + +Emmeline shook her head archly, and answered gaily; and her dear old +venerable home was the engrossing theme of conversation till the return +of Mr. Hamilton, a short time afterwards. + +"Congratulate me, all of you," he said, in a joyous tone; "my business +is proceeding most favourably. Mr. Myrvin need know nothing about it +till all is settled; the dishonourable conduct of his enemies brought to +light, and himself reinstated in his little domain, once more the +minister of Llangwillan. Thanks to the able conduct of Mr. Allan, all +will soon be made clear. As soon as we are at Oakwood, Ellen, you shall +write to Mr. Myrvin, and invite him to spend some little time with us; +and when he leaves us, I trust it will be once more for Llangwillan and +its own pretty vicarage." + +"Dear, dear uncle!" exclaimed Ellen, starting up and clinging to his +arm, "oh, how can I thank you for your interference in behalf of him who +was the first friend I knew in England? the consoler of my +mother--the"-- + +"The good man who first told us what a troublesome charge I should find +in my niece," interrupted Mrs. Hamilton, playfully. + +"I have indeed been a trouble to you," replied Ellen, with a suppressed +yet heavy sigh, and her uncle's hand dropped from her grasp. + +"Ellen!" said Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton at the same instant, in an accent of +reproach. + +"Have I not?" she continued, with unusual impetuosity. "Did I not cause +you misery, you, who from the first moment you knew me, loved mo more +than I deserved? Did I not make both of you ill in health and wretched +in mind, and yet your kindness now is greater than before? There is not +a wish--not a desire I express, but is granted on the instant; and +I--oh, I have no power to--to"-- + +"You will, at least, have the power of making me seriously displeased if +you speak in this way again, and thus turn my sportive words to gloom," +said Mrs. Hamilton, gravely, but gently drawing the agitated girl with +tenderness to her. "Come, come, Ellen, I will not have Emmeline's happy +Oakwood hour thus alloyed. You may reward me yet for all, and one day, +perhaps, make me your debtor. That may appear very impossible now," she +added, smiling, as Ellen raised her large eyes incredulously to her +face; "but more improbable things have come to pass." + +"And where is Arthur to be while his father is with us?" demanded +Emmeline, joyously, of her father. "Not as a servitor at college, I +hope." + +"No; I anticipate the pleasure of welcoming the friend of Herbert as my +guest as well as his father, and then we shall deliberate on Arthur's +future life. I should like much to place him under Mr. Howard for a +year, and then establish him in a living of Lord Malvern's, in which I +have little doubt I could succeed." + +"Well, my fancy then will indeed be gratified. I shall see this proud +persecuted youth, and judge for myself if he be deserving or not of my +brother's friendship. Do you remember him, Ellen?" + +"Perfectly well; he was so very kind to me. I well recollect his grief +when I left the village, to live, he said, in such a very different +style, that it was not likely we should ever meet again." + +"But yet, you see, improbable as it appeared, you will meet again," said +Mrs. Hamilton in a marked tone, as she smiled. + +"So you call this an Oakwood hour, Emmy, do you?" demanded Mr. Hamilton, +after Arthur and his father had been duly discussed. "Suppose we make +the resemblance even more complete by ringing for lights, and you and +Ellen giving me some music. I have had no opportunities of hearing your +improvement, which, I suppose, under such able professors, has been +something extraordinary." + +"Marvellous, most marvellous!" exclaimed Emmeline, laughing, as she flew +to obey him by ringing the bell. "I had begun to fancy I was practising +for nothing, and that my father would never do his child the honour of +listening to her again, but I remembered the enchanted halls of Oakwood, +and I thought there at least I might chain him to my side, and so I +continued my labours." + +"Let us fancy ourselves there," replied her father, smiling; and lights +appearing, Emmeline and Ellen were speedily at the instruments, +bestowing pleasure unalloyed by this domestic use of their talents to +those dear ones who had so assiduously cultivated them. Their +improvement, under the best professors in London, had been rapid; for, +carefully prepared, no difficulties had to be overcome ere improvement +commenced; and the approbation and evident pleasure of Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton amply repaid those young and innocent beings for all the +exertions they had made, particularly Emmeline, who, as we know, had +determined, on her first arrival in London, to prove she would not +learn, when all around her was so changed. + +"Surely, surely, Caroline, surrounded by gaiety as she is, cannot be as +happy as I am to-night," burst with wild glee from the lips of Emmeline, +as at about half-past ten o'clock her father kissed her glowing cheek, +and thanked her for the pleasing recreation she had given him. She had +scarcely spoken, when a carriage was heard driving somewhat rapidly +through the Square, then stopped, it appeared at their door, and a +thundering and truly aristocratic rap resounded, startling not a little +the inmates of that peaceful drawing-room. + +"Who can it be at this hour?" demanded Emmeline, in an accent of +bewilderment. "How very disagreeable. I did not wish any intrusion +to-night. Mamma, dear mamma, you look terrified." + +Mr. Hamilton had opened the drawing-room door, and was about to descend +the stairs, for he too was startled at this unusual visit; but he +turned at Emmeline's words, for his wife did not usually indulge in +unfounded alarm or anticipated fears, but at that instant her wonted +presence of mind appeared about to desert her; she was pale as marble, +and had started up in an attitude of terror. + +Voices were heard, and stops, well-known steps, ascending the stairs. + +"It is the Duchess of Rothbury's voice and step--my child!" burst from +her lips, in an accent that neither Emmeline nor Ellen ever could +forget, and she sunk back almost fainting on her seat. Her children flew +to her side in alarm, but ere a minute had passed away that wild anxiety +was calmed, for Caroline herself entered with the Duchess, but her +death-like cheek, blanched lip, and haggard eye told a tale of suffering +which that mother could not mark unmoved. Vainly Mrs. Hamilton strove to +rise and welcome the Duchess: she had no power to move from her chair. + +"Caroline, my child!" were the only words her faltering tongue could +utter; and that agonized voice thrilled through the heart of the now +truly unhappy girl, and roused her from that trance of overwhelming +emotion which bade her stand spell-bound at the threshold. She sprung +forward, and sinking at her mother's feet, buried her face in her robe. + +"Mother, my injured mother, oh, do not, do not hate me!" she murmured, +in a voice almost inarticulate. "I deserve to be cast from your love, to +lose your confidence for ever. I have deceived you--I--" Sobs choked her +utterance, and the grieving mother could only throw her arms around her +child, and press her convulsively to her heart. Anxiety, nearly equal +to that of his wife, had been an inmate of Mr. Hamilton's bosom as the +Duchess's voice reached his ear; but as he glanced on Caroline, a frown +gathered on his brow. He trembled involuntarily, for he felt assured it +was imprudence, to give it the mildest term, in her conduct that called +for this untimely visit, this strange return to her home. Already he had +been deceived; and while every softened feeling struggled for mastery in +the mother's bosom, the father stood ready to judge and to condemn, +fiercely conquering every rising emotion that swelled within. There was +even more lofty majesty in the carriage of her Grace, as she carefully +closed the drawing-room door behind her, and slowly advanced towards +Mrs. Hamilton; a cold, severe, unbending expression in every feature, +that struck terror to the hearts of both Emmeline and Ellen, whose +innocent festivity was indeed now rudely checked. + +"Mrs. Hamilton," the Duchess said, and the grave and sad accents of her +voice caused the anxious mother hastily to raise her head, and gaze +inquiringly in her face, "to my especial care you committed your child. +I promised to guard her as my own, and on that condition alone you +entrusted her to me; I alone, therefore, restore her to you, thank God, +unscathed. I make no apology for this strange and apparently needless +intrusion at this late hour; deceived as I have been, my house was no +longer a fitting home for your daughter, and not another night could I +retain her, when my judgment told me her father's watchful guardianship +alone could protect her from the designing arts of one, of whom but very +little is known, and that little not such as would recommend him to my +favour. You, too, have been deceived, cruelly deceived, by that weak, +infatuated girl. Had you been aware that Lord Alphingham was her +secretly favoured lover, that the coldness with which she ever treated +him in public, the encouragement of another, were but to conceal from +you and her father her attachment to him, you would not have consented +to her joining a party of which he was a member. At my house he has +received increased encouragement. I marked them with a jealous eye, for +I could not believe his attentions sanctioned either by you or Mr. +Hamilton; but even my vigilance was at fault, for she had consented to +sever every tie which bound her to her too indulgent parents, and fly +with him to Scotland. This night would have seen the accomplishment of +their design. Had one of my children behaved thus, it would have been +less a matter of bewilderment to me than such conduct in a daughter of +yours. I have neglected to seek their confidence, their affection. You +have never rested in your endeavours to obtain both, and therefore, that +such should be your recompense is sad indeed. I sympathise with you, my +dearest friend," she continued, in a tone of much more feeling than she +ever allowed to be visible. "In the tale of shame I am repeating, I am +inflicting misery upon you, I feel I am; and yet, in resigning my +charge, I must do my duty, and set you on your guard, and let this one +reflection be your comfort, that it was the recollection of your +untiring care, your constant affection, which checked this infatuated +girl in her career of error, and bade her pause ere it was too late. For +her sufferings I have little pity; she is no longer the character I +believed her. Neither integrity, honour, nor candour can be any longer +inmates of her heart; the confession I have heard this night has +betrayed a lengthened scheme of deception, to which, had I heard it of +her, I should have given no credence. Forgive me, my dear Emmeline, and +look not on me so beseechingly; painful as it is, in the sincerest +friendship alone I place before your too partial eyes the real character +of your child. I have now done my duty, and will therefore leave you. +God bless you, and grant you strength to bear this bitter trial." She +turned to the unhappy father, who, as she spoke, had, overcome with +uncontrollable agitation, sunk on a chair and covered his face with his +hands, but with a strong effort he roused himself as she pronounced his +name, and rose. + +"Mr. Hamilton, to your wife, your inestimable wife, you owe the +preservation of your child this night from sin. Let her not, I beseech +you, afflict herself too deeply for those sufferings under which she may +behold Caroline for a time the victim. She deserves them all--all; but +she merits not one half that affection which her fond and loving mother +would lavish on her. I leave you now, but, trust me, feeling deeply for +you both." + +"Nay, rest with us to night, at least," exclaimed Mr. Hamilton, +conquering himself sufficiently to think of his friend's situation, +alone, in London, at such a late hour, and endeavouring to persuade her +to remain with them; but decidedly, yet kindly, she refused. + +"I sleep at St. James's, and shall be back at Airslie to-morrow morning +before my guests are recovered from the effects of to-night," she urged. +"Your hospitality is kindly meant, Hamilton, but I cannot accept it; +both Caroline and her mother can dispense with my company now." + +"Then let me accompany you home?" + +"I will not hear of it, my good friend. Good night, once more; God bless +you!" + +Mr. Hamilton knew the character of his noble friend too well to urge +more, and therefore contented himself by accompanying her down stairs. + +To describe Mrs. Hamilton's feelings, as she listened to the words of +the Duchess, would be indeed a vain attempt. We know all the anguish she +had suffered when Caroline's conduct had first caused her uneasiness, +and now the heightened agony of her fond heart may be easily imagined. +Almost unconsciously she had withdrawn her arm; but Caroline clung more +convulsively to her robe, and her first wild words sounded again and +again in her mother's ears, soothing while they inflicted pain. + +"Can it be possible I have heard aright? Have I indeed been thus +deceived?" she asked, struggling to speak calmly, when the Duchess and +her husband had left the room; and she fixed her sad, searching glance +upon Caroline, who for a moment raised her head. + +"Mother, dearest mother, condemn me, despise me as you please; I deserve +it all," she replied, in an accent of most piercing wretchedness. "Only +say that I may in time regain your love, your confidence; that you will +take me to your heart again. I have disregarded your affection; I have +wilfully cast it from me. Yet--oh, if you knew all I have suffered. +Mamma, mamma, oh, speak but one word more of kindness! I know I deserve +it not, but my heart feels breaking. I have no other friend on earth +but you; oh, call me but your child again, mother!" + +Her voice utterly failed, a film suddenly obscured her sight, and a +sense of suffocation rose in her throat; the misery of the last ten +days, the wretchedness and excitement of that day had deprived her of +more strength than she was at all aware of, and with one convulsive +effort to clasp her mother's hand to her throbbing heart, she sunk +exhausted at her feet. Emmeline would have flown for assistance, but a +look from her mother bade her pause, and she remained with Ellen to seek +those restoratives that were at hand. With a throbbing heart and +trembling hand, Mrs. Hamilton raised her repentant child, and with the +assistance of Emmeline placed her tenderly on the nearest couch, +endeavouring, though for some few minutes in vain, to recall her +scattered senses. Tears fell from that fond mother's eyes upon +Caroline's deathlike features, and ere life returned she had been +pressed again and again to her heart, and repeated kisses imprinted on +her marble brow. It mattered not at that moment that she had been +deceived, that Caroline had withdrawn alike her confidence and +affection, that her conduct the last few months had been productive of +bitter disappointment and extreme anguish, all, all was forgotten; the +mother only knew her child was suffering--only felt she was restored to +her arms; again and again she kissed her erring child, beseeching her +with fond and gentle words to wake and know she was forgiven. + +Slowly Caroline recovered consciousness, and unclosing her eyes, gazed +wildly yet sadly on all by whom she was surrounded. All the father had +struggled with Mr. Hamilton, as he stood by her side during the +continuance of her swoon; but now sternness again darkened his brow, and +he would have given vent to his wounded feelings in severe though just +reproaches, but the beseeching glance, the agonized voice of his wife +arrested him. + +"Arthur, my husband, oh, for my sake, spare her now!" she passionately +exclaimed, clasping his hand in hers, and looking up in his face with +imploring earnestness. "Spare her, at least, till from her own lips we +have heard all; she is in no state to bear anger now, however deserved. +Arthur, dearest Arthur, oh, do not reproach her till we know what it is +that has caused the wretchedness, the suffering we behold! For my sake, +spare her now." + +"Mother," murmured the unhappy girl, with a powerful effort rising from +the couch, and flinging herself on Mrs. Hamilton's neck, "do not plead +for me; I do not deserve it. My conduct to you the last few months would +alone demand the severest reproaches papa could inflict; and that, oh, +that is but little to the crime I should have committed, had not the +remembrance of all your devotion rushed to my mind, and arrested me, but +a few brief hours ere it would have been too late, and I should have +sacrificed myself to a man I discovered I did not love, merely to prove +I was not a slave to your dictates, that I had a will of my own, and +with or without your consent would abide by it. I have been infatuated, +blind--led on by artful persuasion, false representations, and weakly I +have yielded. Do not weep for me, Emmeline, I am not worthy of your +tears. You would have guided me aright; you would have warned me, +advised me, but I rejected your counsel, spurned your affection; with +contempt, aversion from all, from each, do I deserve to be regarded. +Ellen, you may triumph now; I did all I could to prove how I hated and +despised you some months ago, and now, oh, how much more I have fallen. +Oh, why, why did I ever leave Oakwood?--why was I so eager to visit +London?" Exhaustion choked her voice, the vehemence with which she had +spoken overpowered her, and her mother was compelled to lead her to a +couch, and force her to sit down beside her. Mr. Hamilton spoke not; for +a few minutes he paced the room with agitated steps, and then hastily +quitted it. + +"It is so very late, you had better retire, my dear girls," Mrs. +Hamilton said, after a brief pause, addressing Emmeline and Ellen, who +yet lingered sorrowfully near her. They understood her hint, and +instantly obeyed, both affectionately but silently embracing Caroline +ere they departed; and it was a relief to Mrs. Hamilton's anxious bosom +to find herself alone with her painfully repentant child. For some time +did that interview continue; and when Caroline retired to rest, it was +with a spirit lighter than it had been for many weeks, spite of the dark +clouds she still felt were around her. All her strange wayward feelings +had been confessed. She laid no stress on those continued letters she +had received from Annie, which had from the first alienated her from her +mother. Remorse was too busy within to bid her attempt to defend herself +by inculpating others; but though she carefully avoided reference to her +misleading friend, Mrs. Hamilton could easily, very easily, perceive +from whose arts all her own misery and Caroline's present suffering +originated; and bitterly in secret she reproached herself for ever +permitting that intimacy to continue, and obtain the influence it had. +To Lord St. Eval and her conduct to him the unhappy girl also referred. +Pride was completely at an end; every question Mrs. Hamilton asked was +answered with all that candour and integrity which had once +characterised her most trifling words; and while her undisguised +confession on many points occasioned the most poignant sorrow, yet +still, as the mother listened, and gazed on those expressive features, +something whispered within her that her child would be a blessing still. +She owned that from the moment she had rejected Lord St. Eval, regret +had become so unceasing, that to escape it she had listened to and +encouraged Lord Alphingham more than she had done before; his +professions of devoted love had appeared as balm, and deadened the +reproaches of conscience. Why she had so carefully concealed from her +parents that which she imagined was love for the Viscount she could not +explain, unless it was her weakness in following the example of others, +who, she had been told, shrunk from confessing love-stories to their +mothers; or, and that Mrs. Hamilton believed much nearer the real +reason, she did not love him sufficiently to implore their consent to +his addresses. She acknowledged, when their prohibition to her +acquaintance with him was given, she had longed to confess the truth, +and implore them at least to say why she might no longer enjoy his +society; but that she had felt too indignant at what she deemed the +slavery in which she was held, and discontent and irritation then took +possession of her, instead of willing obedience. She described her +feelings when he appeared at Airslie, the many struggles she then had +with herself; and, finally, her wretchedness from the moment she had +consented to be his wife; her entreaties that he would permit her to +implore her father's consent; her agony the same evening; her fervent +prayer for forgiveness and guidance; and, at length, her determination +to elude him by setting off for home the instant the Duchess and her +party had left the villa, which intention she had endeavoured to put in +force by imploring the assistance and secrecy of her Grace's own maid to +procure her a safe carriage and fleet horses, as she was compelled to +return home that same night; she would leave a note, she said, +explaining her reason for her departure to her Grace. She fancied +Allison must have betrayed her, as, when she was every minute expecting +to hear the carriage was ready, the Duchess entered her room, and, after +a brief but stern interview, ordered her own carriage, and had herself +accompanied her to town. + +Mrs. Hamilton listened to this long sad tale without interrupting it by +a word of reproach. Not once did she speak aught that might tend to +increase the anguish under which it was so evident Caroline was +suffering. Soothingly she spoke, and that fond yet saddened tone caused +the poor girl's bursting heart to find relief in a violent flood of +tears. She clung, even as in childhood, to her mother's neck, and as she +wept, felt yet more bitterly the infatuated folly of her conduct in +having for a moment forsaken the guidance of her true and kindest +friend, for the apparently more pleasing, because flattering, confidence +of one whom she now knew to be false and utterly deceiving. + +"But may he not still claim me?" she wildly exclaimed. "Will he not hold +me up to the world as a faithless, capricious girl? I shall be the +laughing-stock of all with whom we associate. Annie is not likely to +keep my secret. Oh, why did I ever confide in her? Mother, I shall be +despised, derided. I know I have brought it on myself, but oh, how can I +bear it?" + +"We leave London so very shortly, that I trust you will not be exposed +to the derision you so much dread," replied Mrs. Hamilton, soothingly, +"and by next season I hope all floating rumours that your conduct must +occasion may have entirely passed away. You need not fear the scorn of +the circle in which we principally mingle; and that of Annie's +companions, if the dread of their laughter keep you from seeking, as you +have done, their society, forgive me, my love, if I say I shall rejoice; +for you will then no longer be exposed to example and precept contrary +to those I have endeavoured to instil." + +"But, Lord Alphingham, what will he say or do?" murmured Caroline, +almost inaudibly. + +"You must write to him, Caroline, dissolving your engagement; there is +no other way." + +"Write to him, mother, I--oh, no, no, I cannot." + +"If you do not, you will still be exposed to constant annoyance; he may +choose to believe that you were forced by compulsion to return to us. +The circumstance of the Duchess herself accompanying you to town, he +will consider as sufficient evidence. Acting on your promise, on your +avowed preference, unless you write yourself, he will leave no means +untried to succeed in his sinful schemes. Painful as is the task, or +rather more disagreeable than painful if you do not love him, no one but +yourself must write, and the sooner you do so the better." + +"But if he really loves me? How can I--how dare I inflict more pain, +more disappointment, than I have done already?" + +"Loves you!" repeated Mrs. Hamilton, and displeasure mingled in her +saddened tone; "Caroline, do not permit yourself to be thus egregiously +deceived. He may fancy that he does, but it is no true honourable love; +if it were, would he thus bear you by stealth from the friend to whom +you were intrusted? If his conscience were indeed free from all stain, +would he have refused your entreaties that you might confess your love +to us, and beseech our blessing on your union? Would he have shrunk from +defending his conduct according to your advice? Nay, more; if this +accusation, which he has traced by some means to Percy, were indeed +unfounded and unjust, do you think he would have refrained one moment +from coming forward and asserting, not only by word but by proof, his +unblemished innocence? His silence is to me the clearest proof of +conduct that will not bear investigation; and I tremble to think what +miseries, what wretchedness might have been your portion, had you indeed +consented to his unworthy proposal." Her voice faltered, and she drew +the still weeping girl closer to her, as if her maternal love should +protect her from every evil. Caroline answered not, and after a few +minutes Mrs. Hamilton said, with tenderness-- + +"You do not repent your decision, my own child? You do not regret that +you have returned to those who love and cherish you so fondly? Speak to +me, love." + +Convulsively Caroline's hand pressed her mother's as if that pressure +should say nothing more should part them; then suddenly sinking on her +knees before her, she forced back the choking sobs, and said, clearly +and distinctly--- + +"Mother, I dare no longer ask you to believe my simple word, as in +former years you would have done, I have deceived you too long, too +culpably for that; but now, on my knees, solemnly, sacredly I swear, I +will never marry without papa's and your consent. I dare no longer trust +myself; I have once been rendered blind by that sinful craving for +freedom from all authority, for unchecked independence of thought and +word and deed, and never, never more will I stand forth in my own +weakness. My fate is in your hands, for never will I marry without your +blessing; and may that vow be registered above as solemnly as it is now +taken. Mother, you will not refuse to accept it," she added, laying her +trembling hand on Mrs. Hamilton's, and gazing beseechingly in her face. + +"I will not, my child!" and her mother struggled severely to conquer her +emotion and speak calmly. "Tell me only it is in my affection you +confide, that it is not under feelings of remorse alone you have made +this solemn vow. Promise me you will no longer permit a doubt of my +affection and interest in your happiness to enter your mind and poison +your confidence in me, as it has done. From that doubt all the present +misery has proceeded. You have imagined your parents harsh and cruel, +while they have only thought of your welfare. Say only you will trust in +our affection, my child, my own Caroline." + +"Oh, that I had ever trusted in it. My blindness and folly concealed +from me my misconduct, and bade me ascribe all my sufferings to you, on +whom I have inflicted so much pain. Mother, oh, forgive me, plead for +me to papa. I know he is seriously displeased, he has every right to be +so; but he knows not all I have endured, the agony of the last week. I +deserve his severest reproaches, but my heart feels as if it would break +beneath his anger now," and she laid her aching head on her mother's +lap, and wept. + +"My forgiveness, my blessing, are both yours, my own. Do not weep thus," +replied Mrs. Hamilton, imprinting a kiss on that burning forehead. "And +your father too, when he has heard all, will not withhold his love." + +"I will write to Lord Alphingham now, mother; it is useless to defer it, +and my mind will not regain its peace till it is done," exclaimed +Caroline, after a brief pause, which had followed her mother's words. + +"Not now, my love, you are too agitated still," replied her mother, +gazing anxiously on her flushed cheek; "wait till sleep shall have +calmed this inward fever, and restored you to composure. I do not think +you can write it now." + +"I cannot sleep till I have, mamma, indeed I cannot. I ought to have +left it for him before I quitted Airslie, but I could then think of +nothing but the ardent longing to see you, to hear your voice again; let +me write now." + +And believing her words were true, that in all probability she would not +sleep while that letter was on her mind, Mrs. Hamilton made no further +objection, and rose to place the inkstand and portfolio on a table near +her. Caroline remained still kneeling, and by her attitude Mrs. Hamilton +fancied was engaged in secret prayer; her tears were checked as she +rose, and it was with firmness she walked to the table and drew a seat +beside it. Anxiously for a few minutes did her mother watch her as she +wrote. At first her hand appeared to tremble, but a successful effort +conquered that emotion, and the increasing flush upon her cheek alone +proclaimed the agitation of her mind. So deeply was she engrossed in her +painful task, that she did not observe her mother had left the room, and +remained absent for a few minutes, returning, however, before she had +finished her letter. Without looking up, she placed the paper in Mrs. +Hamilton's hands, and, leaning her arms on the table, buried her face in +her hands. + +Mrs. Hamilton folded the letter in perfect silence; but then taking the +hand of her daughter from her eyes, she pressed it in hers, and said, in +a voice of deep emotion-- + +"I am satisfied, my child. Let this letter be directed and sealed with +your own hand, and the name of Lord Alphingham shall never again pass my +lips. It is enough that duty and affection have triumphed over his +intentions. I know not all the evil that might have been yours had he +succeeded, but you are restored to me, and may God forgive him as freely +as I do." + +With a steady hand Caroline directed and placed her own seal to the +letter; and then, exhausted by the agitation of that evening, she leaned +her throbbing head against her mother. + +"Caroline, my child!" exclaimed a deep and saddened voice beside her. +She started, and looking up, beheld her father, who had been gazing at +her an unobserved spectator for the last half hour. + +"Forgive me, dearest father. Oh, let me not sleep to-night without your +forgiveness. Mamma will not cast me from her heart; she has blessed me, +and I have injured her even more than you. Papa, dear papa, oh, speak to +me but one word of fondness!" she entreated, as her father drew her to +his bosom, and as she ceased, mingled his blessing and forgiveness in +that warm embrace. + +It was late, so late, that the early morn was beginning to gild the +horizon before Mrs. Hamilton had seen her agitated child placed in bed, +and persuaded her to compose her spirits and invite sleep. Fondly her +mother watched beside her till the grey dawn had penetrated within the +room; and then perceiving that calm, sleep had come at length, she +retired to her own apartment. There sinking on her knees, her +overcharged heart found blessed relief in pouring forth to Heaven its +fervent thanksgiving for that great mercy vouchsafed her in the +restoration of her child. The anguish of the past, the suffering of the +present were alike forgotten, in the thought that Caroline's affection +and confidence were again restored to her. The veil had at length been +removed from her eyes. Annie's character was revealed before her and the +sorrowful and repentant girl had once more sought for sympathy in the +bosom of her mother. She now felt that mother was her truest friend, and +a glow of sweet and soothing pleasure stole over Mrs. Hamilton's mind at +this conviction. Caroline had said it was the recollection of her +mother's care, devotion, and love that had stayed her, ere it was too +late. She could not banish from her heart the duty therein so long and +carefully implanted; the principles of religion, of virtue, shaken as +they had been in that painful moment of indecision, had preserved her +from misery. Often, very often, Mrs. Hamilton had felt disheartened, +almost despairing in her task, during both the childhood and youth of +Caroline, but now her recompense was apparent. Had she not persevered, +had she been indolent or careless in the discharge of her duty, had she +left the care of that child to strangers, who would never have thus +studied or guided so difficult a disposition, there would have been +naught to bid her pause. She would have done as others too often do, and +fearful indeed would have been her chastisement. Now, what were all Mrs. +Hamilton's self-conquering struggles, all the pain she had suffered, +compared with the exquisite happiness of feeling that her care had +preserved her child, and she knew not as yet from what depth of +wretchedness? Fervent was the gratitude for that grace which had +permitted her to guide her child aright; and as she recalled the +heartfelt approbation of her conduct, which her beloved husband had +gratefully expressed, happiness filled her heart, and many, very many +might have envied that noble woman her feelings, as she laid her head on +her pillow that night, when sleep only hushed the still lingering +thanksgiving on her lips. + +It may be well here briefly to relate all that had passed at Airslie, +from the moment we left Caroline imploring pardon and guidance from Him, +to whom she had never appealed in vain, to that when she so suddenly +appeared in company with the Duchess in Berkeley Square. To accede to +Lord Alphingham's wishes, she felt was no longer possible, but how to +avoid him was a matter of still greater difficulty. To accompany the +Duchess and thus elude him, she could not, for she felt neither her +strength nor spirits could sustain her through the whole of that festive +night. Each minute as it passed increased the fever of her brain, at +length in despair she determined on the conduct with which we are +already acquainted. As soon as the last carriage had rolled from the +door she summoned Allison, the Duchess's own maid, and in accents that +painfully betrayed the agitation within, implored her to procure her a +carriage and fleet horses, as circumstances had occurred which obliged +her instantly to return to town. She besought her neither to question +her nor to speak of her sudden resolution to any one, as the note she +would leave behind for her Grace would fully explain all. Allison +remained for some few minutes gazing on the agitated girl, in motionless +astonishment. + +"Return to London at such a time of night, and alone," she rather +allowed to drop from her lips than said, after a long pause. + +"Oh, would to heaven some one would go with me! but I know none whom I +can ask," Caroline replied, in a tone of anguish, and seizing Allison's +hand, again and again implored her assistance. Briefly she promised to +do all she could for her, and left her, not to do her bidding by seeking +some conveyance, but to report the strange request and still more +alarming manner of Caroline to her Grace; who, for some secret reason, +which her daughters and friends in vain endeavoured to solve, had at the +very last moment declared her intention of not accompanying them, and +wishing them, with the utmost kindness, a pleasant evening, commissioned +Lady Lucy and her eldest brother, who had lately joined them, to supply +her place in their own party, and tender her excuses to the noble master +of the _fête_. The simple truth was, that the penetration of the Duchess +had observed and detected from the very first the manoeuvres of Lord +Alphingham and Caroline. + +The former, as may have already been discovered, was one of those +against whom her prejudice was very strong. With her own free will, Lord +Alphingham would never have visited at her house, although she was never +heard to breathe one word to his disadvantage; especially invited he +never was, and in heart she was much annoyed at her husband's marked +preference and encouragement of his society. She had observed her friend +Mrs. Hamilton's coldness towards him; and as much as she admired the +conduct of the mother, so she sometimes found herself mistrusting the +studied air and guarded reserve with which Caroline ever treated the +Viscount. The sudden change in Mr. Hamilton's manner had also struck +her, and therefore, when Alphingham joined her coterie, not once did she +ever fail in the jealous watchfulness with which she regarded him and +Caroline. Rendered suspicious by all that she had observed, Caroline's +determination not to join the party that evening had increased her +uneasiness to a degree that almost amounted to alarm, and that very +instant her resolution was fixed to remain at Airslie. She desired +Allison not to mention her intention of remaining to Miss Hamilton, but +to inform her minutely of all that passed during the evening; and her +astonishment was almost as great as her domestic's had been when +Caroline's desire was related to her. + +It wanted but one half hour to the time appointed by the Viscount, and +Caroline still sat in a state of anxiety and suspense, which tortured +her almost to frenzy. Unable to bear it longer, her hand was on the bell +once more to summon Allison, when the lock of the door turned, and +starting forwards, the words, "Is all ready--have you succeeded?" were +arrested on her lips by the appearance of the Duchess herself, who, +closing the door, stood gazing on the terrified girl with a glance of +severity and command few could have met unmoved. Scarcely conscious of +what she did, Caroline started back, and, sinking on a stool at the +farthest end of the room, covered her face with her hands. + +"May I know with what intent Miss Hamilton is about to withdraw herself +from my roof and my protection?" she demanded, in those brief yet +searching tones she ever used when displeased. "What reason she can +allege for this unceremonious departure from a house where she has ever +been regarded as one of its most favoured inmates? Your mother trusted +you to my care, and on your duty to her I demand an answer." She +continued, after a brief pause, in which Caroline neither moved nor +spoke, "Where would you go at this unseasonable hour?" + +"Home to my mother," murmured the unhappy girl, in a voice almost +inarticulate. + +"Home!" repeated her Grace, in a bitterly satirical tone. "Strange, that +you should thus suddenly desire to return. Were you not the child of +those to whom equivocation is unknown, I might well doubt that +tale;--home, and wherefore?" + +"To save myself from the effects of my own sinful folly--my own +infatuated madness," replied Caroline, summoning with a strong effort +all the energy of her character, and with a vehemence that flushed her +pallid cheek with crimson. "In this at least I am sincere, though in all +else I deserve no longer to be regarded as the child of such +noble-minded beings as are my parents. Spurn me from you as you will, +this is no moment for equivocation and delay. I have deceived your +Grace. I was about to bring down shame upon your house, to cause your +indignant displeasure, my parents anguish, myself but endless remorseful +misery. To save all this, I would return home to implore the +forgiveness, the protection of my parents; they alone can guard me from +myself. Oh, if you ever loved my mother," she continued, starting up +with agony, as the hour of nine chimed on her ear, "send some one with +me, and let me go home. Half an hour more," and her voice grew almost +inarticulate with suppressed emotion, "and it may be too late. Mother, +mother, if I could but see you once again!" + +"Before, as the wife or the victim of the Right Honourable Lord +Alphingham, you fly from her for ever, and thus reward her cares, her +love, her prayers, wretched and deceiving girl," sternly and slowly the +Duchess said, as she rapidly yet with her usual majesty paced the room, +and laid her hand heavily on Caroline's shoulder, as she sat bowed down +with shame before her. "Deny it not; it was thus you would bring down +shame on my home; thus create agony for your devoted parents; thus prove +your gratitude, love, obedience, by wrenching every tie asunder. Oh, +shame, shame! If this be the fruit of such tender cares, such careful +training, oh, where shall we seek for honour and integrity--in what +heart find virtue? And why not consummate your sin? why pause ere your +noble and virtuous resolution was put in force? why hesitate in the +accomplishment of your designs? Why not fly with your honourable lover, +and thus wring the fond hearts of your parents at once to the utmost? +Why retract now, when it will be only to delude again? Miserable and +deluded girl, what new whim has caused this sudden change? Wherefore +wait till it be too late to repent--to persuade us that you are an +unwilling abettor and assistant in this man's schemes? Go, fly with him; +it were better to reconcile your indulgent mother to an eternal +separation, than that she should take you once more to her heart, and be +again deceived. Go, your secret is safe. How dare you speak of +inflicting misery on your parents? Must not hypocrisy lurk in every +word, when wilfully, recklessly, you have already abused their +confidence and insulted their love? much more you cannot do." She +paused, as if in expectation of a reply, but none came. Caroline's +breaking heart had lost that proud spirit which, a few days before, +would have called a haughty answer from her lips. She writhed beneath +those stern unpitying accents, which perhaps in such a moment of +remorseful agony might have been spared, but she replied not; and, after +a brief silence, the Duchess again spoke. + +"Caroline, answer me. What has caused this sudden change in your +intentions? What has chanced between you and Lord Alphingham to demand +this sudden longing for home? What impulse bids you thus elude him?" + +"The memory of my mother's love," and Caroline raised her head, and +pushing back her disordered hair, gazed upon the face of the Duchess +with an expression of suffering few could have looked upon unmoved. +"You are right, I have deceived my too indulgent parents, I have abused +their confidence, insulted their love; but I cannot, oh, I cannot still +those principles within me which they have implanted. In my hours of +maddening folly I remembered them not; I believed they had gone from me +for ever, and I should be happy. They have returned to torture me, to +tell me that as the wife of Lord Alphingham, without the blessing of my +parents, I shall be wretched. I have brought down endless misery on +myself--that matters not; but oh, I will not cause them further +suffering. I will no longer wring the heart of my gentle mother, who has +so often prayed for her erring child. Too late, perhaps, I have +determined, but the wife of Lord Alphingham I will never be; but his +character is still dear to me, and I entreat your Grace not to withdraw +your favour from him. He alone is not to blame, I also am culpable, for +I acknowledge the encouragement I have given him. My character for +integrity is gone, but his is still unstained." + +"Fear not for him, my favour he has never had; but my honour is too dear +to me for such an affair as this to pass my lips. Let him continue the +courted, the spoiled, the flattered child of fashion he has ever been. I +regard him not. Let him run his course rejoicing, it matters not to me." +She rang the bell as she spoke, and slowly and silently paced the room +till Allison obeyed the summons. "Desire James to put four swift horses +to the chariot. Important business calls me instantly to London; bid him +use dispatch, every moment is precious." + +Allison departed, and the Duchess continued pacing the apartment till +she returned, announcing the carriage as ready. A very few minutes +sufficed for their personal preparations, for the Duchess to give +peremptory orders to her trusty Allison to keep her departure a profound +secret, as she should return before her guests were stirring the next +morning, and herself account for Miss Hamilton's sudden return home. Few +words were sufficient for Allison, who was in all respects well fitted +for the situation she held near a person of the Duchess of Rothbury's +character; and the carriage rolled rapidly from Airslie. + +Not another word passed between the travelling companions. In feverish +agitation on the part of Caroline, in cold, unbending sternness on that +of the Duchess, their journey passed. To the imagination of the former, +the roll of the carriage-wheels was the sound of pursuing horses; in +every turn of the road her fevered fancy beheld the figure of Lord +Alphingham: at one time glaring on her in reproachful bitterness, at +another, in mockery, derision, satire; and when she closed her eyes, +those visions still tormented, nor did they depart till she felt her +mother's arm around her, her gentle voice pronounce her name. + +True to her determination, the Duchess left London as early as six the +following day, and, as usual, was the first within the breakfast-room, +and little could her friends imagine that since they had left her the +preceding evening she had made a journey to London and back. Caroline's +indisposition, which had been evident for several days, although she had +not complained till the day before, easily accounted for her return +home, although the exact time of her doing so was known to none save her +Grace herself; and even if surprise had been created, it would speedily +have passed away in the whirl of amusements which surrounded them. But +the courted, the admired, the fascinating Viscount no longer joined the +festive group. His friend Sir Walter Courtenay accounted for and excused +his absence, by stating that Lord Alphingham had received a disagreeable +letter from an agent of his in Scotland, which demanded his instant +presence; that he intended passing through London, thence proceed to the +North, where, in all probability, he should await the hunting season, +being engaged to join a large circle of noble friends. + +It would be useless to linger on the impotent fury of Lord Alphingham +when he discovered his well-conceived plans were utterly frustrated, and +that his intended victim had eluded him, under the stern guardianship of +the Duchess of Rothbury. In the first bitter moment of disappointment, +he refused to accuse Caroline of any share in it, but believed their +plans had been, by some unforeseen circumstance, discovered, and she had +been forced to return home. If such were the case, he vowed to withdraw +her from such galling slavery; he swore by some means to make her his +own. But when her letter reached him, when he had perused its contents, +and marked that not one word gave evidence of agitation of mind or +unsteadiness of purpose, the current of his feelings changed. He cursed +his own mad folly for thus seeking one, in whom from the first he might +have seen there was no spirit, no quality suited to be his partner in a +fashionable world; he vowed to think no more of a weak, capricious fool, +so he now termed the girl he had fancied that he loved. As may readily +be imagined, he felt his self love very deeply wounded by the complete +frustration of his intentions, and being incapable of appreciating the +better principles which had fortunately actuated the resolve of +Caroline, a spirit of revenge entered his heart. He crushed the letter +in his hand, and paced the room in fury, and would have torn it to +atoms, when the thought struck him, that by enclosing the letter to the +confidant and adviser of his plans regarding Caroline, he might save +himself the mortification of relating his defeat, and revenge himself +effectually by exposing her to ridicule and contempt. + +He wrote therefore a few concise lines, regretting, in a slightly +satirical style, that Miss Grahame should have been so deceived with +regard to the views and feelings of her friend Miss Hamilton, and +referring her to the enclosed letter for all further explanation. + +Annie received this packet at the time she was in daily expectation of +the triumph of her schemes, the gratification of her dislike for the +being whose gentle admonitions she so much resented, which had been +dictated by Mrs. Hamilton's wish to increase the happiness of her +parents and herself. Lord Alphingham had regularly informed her of all +his intentions, and though Caroline had for some time entirely ceased to +write, yet she suspected nothing like defeat. Already she secretly +indulged in triumph, already anticipated the moment when every malignant +wish would be fulfilled, and she should see the proud, cold, disdainful +Mrs. Hamilton bowed down beneath the conduct of her child, humbled to +the dust by the reflections which would be cast upon her when the +elopement of Caroline should be made public; at that very time the +letter of Lord Alphingham arrived, and told her of defeat, complete, +irremediable. Scorn, bitter scorn curled her lip, as she glanced over +Caroline's epistle, thus dishonourably transmitted for her perusal. +Severe disappointment was for the time her portion, and yet, amid all +these violent emotions, attendant on one of her disposition, there was +one of a very different nature mingling with them, one that, while she +resolved if she could not mortify Mrs. Hamilton as she had intended, she +would yet do so by insinuations against Caroline's character, whenever +she had an opportunity; would bid her rejoice, strangely rejoice, that +she was not the wife of Lord Alphingham, that he was still free. While +she looked forward to that letter announcing the union of the Viscount +and Caroline, as placing the final seal on her triumphant schemes, we +may well doubt if even that enjoyment, the exultations in the sufferings +of another, would have stilled the anguish of her own heart, and +permitted her to triumph as she intended to have done, when the man she +loved was the husband of another. It was even so, though rendered by +prejudice almost insensible to anything but her hatred of Mrs. Hamilton. + +Annie had not associated so intimately with Lord Alphingham without +feeling the effect of his many fascinations; and, therefore, though both +provoked and disappointed at this unlooked-for failure of her schemes, +she was better enabled to overcome them. Resolving to leave her designs +against the peace of Caroline and her mother henceforth to chance, all +her energies were now put in action for the attainment of one grand +object, to so work upon the disappointed Viscount as herself to take the +place in his favour which Caroline had occupied. Her reply to his +letter, which he had earnestly requested might enclose Caroline's, and +be forwarded to him in London, was guarded, but artfully tending to +inflame his indignation against Caroline; suppressing her own opinion on +the subject, and exciting admiration of herself, and perhaps gratitude +for her untiring sympathy in his welfare, which she ably contrived +should breathe despondingly throughout. As that important affair, she +added, was thus unhappily over, their correspondence she felt ought to +cease, and she begged Lord Alphingham would write to her no more. She +had braved remark when the happiness of two in whom she was so deeply +interested was at stake; but as in that she had been disappointed, pain +as it was for her to be the one to check a correspondence which could +not fail to give her pleasure, being with one so enlightened, and in +every way so superior as Lord Alphingham, she insisted that no more +letters should pass between them. She gained her point; the Viscount +wondered how he could ever be so blind as to prefer Caroline to her, and +her words added weight to his resolution, to annoy the former by devoted +attentions to Miss Grahame, and, if it suited his interests, make the +latter his wife. + +The interviews Lord Alphingham contrived to have with Miss Grahame, +before he retired to Scotland, which he did not do for a fortnight after +his rejection, strengthened the intentions of both. The Viscount found +new charms in the reserve and agitation which now marked Annie's +behaviour, in the faint voice and well-concealed intelligence, that +however she might sympathise in his vexation, for herself she could not +regret his freedom. All this, though they were scarcely ever alone, +formed a perfect understanding between them, and quickly banished the +image of Caroline from the vain and fickle-minded Alphingham. + +Wishing to keep up her pretended friendship for Caroline, that she +might the more effectually wound her, and not believing the sentiments +of the misguided girl were changed towards her also, Annie called at +Berkeley Square a very few days after Caroline's return, and she had +become acquainted with all that had passed. No one was visible in the +drawing-room; the young men, she knew, had both arrived from college, +but the house was destitute of that air of cheerfulness and glee which +generally attended their return. Some little time she waited with +impatient displeasure, which did not lessen when, on hearing the door +open, she beheld, not Caroline but Mrs. Hamilton herself, her cheek +pale, as if from some internal suffering, but with even more than her +wonted dignity both in mien and step, and for a moment Annie struggled +in vain to speak with the eagerness with which she intended to have +inquired for Caroline; before the mild yet penetrating glance of Mrs. +Hamilton even her self-possession appeared about to abandon her. She +felt lowered, humbled in her presence, and it was this, perhaps, this +very sense of inferiority, which had ever heightened dislike. + +Mildly, yet coldly and briefly, Mrs. Hamilton answered Miss Grahame's +torrent of questions and regrets which followed her information, that +Caroline was not well enough to see any one but her own family, and +that, as they left London some little time sooner than they had +originally intended, she had begged her mother to tender her farewell. +Annie expressed excessive sorrow, but no effort on either side was made +to prolong this interview, and it was very quickly over. Annie returned +home dissatisfied and angry, determining to make one attempt more; and +if that failed, she thought she could as successfully wound by inuendoes +and ridicule, should mere acquaintance take the place of intimate +friendship. + +Miss Grahame accordingly wrote in a truly heroic and highly-phrased +style, regretting, sympathising, and encouraging; but the answer, though +guardedly worded, told her too plainly all her influence was over. + +"I am not strong enough," wrote Caroline, "yet to argue with you, or +defend my conduct, as I feel sure I should be compelled to do, did we +meet now. I find, too late, that on many points we differ so completely, +that the confidential intercourse, which has hitherto been ours, must +henceforth be at an end. Forgive me, dear Annie, if it grieves you to +read these words; believe me, it is painful to me to write them. But now +that my feelings on so many important subjects have been changed--now +that the blinding film has been mercifully removed from my eyes, and I +see the whole extent of my sinful folly, I cannot hope to find the same +friend in you. Too late, for my peace, I have discovered that our +principles of duty are directly opposite. I blame you not for what I am, +for the suffering I am still enduring, no, for that I alone have caused; +but your persuasions, your representations heightened the evil, +strengthened me in my sinful course. You saw my folly, and worked on it, +by sowing the seeds of mistrust and dislike towards my parents. I was a +passive tool in your hands, and you endeavoured to mould me according to +your notions of happiness. I thank you for all the interest you have +thus endeavoured to prove for me. You cannot regret withdrawing it, now +I have in your eyes proved myself so undeserving. This is the last +confidential letter I shall ever write, save to her who is indeed my +best, my truest, most indulgent friend on earth; but before I entirely +conclude, the love, the friendship I have felt for you compels me to +implore you to pause in your career. Oh, Annie, do not follow up those +principles you would have instilled in me; do not, oh, as you value +future innocence and peace, do not let them be your guide in life; you +will find them hollow, vain, and false. Pause but for one moment, and +reflect. Can there he happiness without virtue, peace without integrity? +Is there pleasure without truth? Was deception productive of felicity to +me? Oh, no, no. That visit to London, that introduction in the gay world +to which I looked forward with so much joy, the retrospection of which I +hoped would have enlivened Oakwood, oh, what does it present? A dreary +waste of life, varied only by remorse. Had my career been yours, you +would perhaps have looked on it differently; but I cannot. Oh, Annie, +once more, I beseech, let not such principles actuate your future +conduct; they are wrong, they will load to misery here, and what +preparation are they for eternity? + +"Farewell, and may God bless you! We shall not, perhaps, meet again till +next season, and then it cannot be as we have parted. An interest in +your welfare I shall ever feel, but intimacy must be at an end between +us. + +"CAROLINE." + + + + +CHAPTER VIII. + + +There was a dark lowering frown obscuring the noble and usually open +brow of the young heir of Oakwood, and undisguised anger visible in +every feature and every movement, as he paced the library with +disordered steps, about ten days after the events we have recorded, and +three since his return from college. He had crossed his arms on his +chest, which was swelling with the emotion he was with difficulty +repressing, and his tall, elegant figure appeared to increase in height +beneath his indignant and, in this case, just displeasure. + +Caroline's depression had not decreased since her brother's arrival. She +felt she had been unjust to Percy, and a degree of coldness which had +appeared at first in his conduct towards her, occasioned, though she +knew it not, by her rejection of his friend St. Eval, which he believed +was occasioned by her love of Alphingham, whom he fancied she still +continued to regard with an eye of favour; both these causes created +reserve and distance between the brother and sister, in lieu of that +cordiality which had hitherto subsisted between them. + +Percy had not been aware of all that had passed between the Viscount and +Caroline till that morning, when Emmeline, hoping to soften his manner +towards her sister, related, with all her natural eloquence, the +Viscount's conduct, and the triumph of duty which Caroline had achieved. +That he had even asked her of his father, Percy knew not till then, and +it was this intelligence bursting on him at once which called forth such +violent anger. Emmeline had been summoned away before she had time to +note the startling effects of her words; but Herbert did, and though he +was unacquainted with the secret cause of his brother's dislike towards +Lord Alphingham, he endeavoured by gentle eloquence to pacify and turn +him from his purpose, at which he trembled. + +"The villain, the cold-blooded, despicable villain!" muttered Percy at +intervals, as he continued his hurried pace, without heeding, perhaps +not hearing, Herbert's persuasive accents. "To act thus foully--to play +thus on the unguarded feelings of a weak, at least, unsophisticated, +unsuspecting girl--to gain her love, to destine her to ruin and shame, +the heartless miscreant! Oh, that my promise prevented not my exposing +him to the whole world; but there is another way--the villain shall find +such conduct passes not unheeded!" + +"You are right, Percy," interposed Herbert, gently determining not to +understand him. "If his conduct be indeed such as to call forth, with +justice, this irritation on your part, his punishment will come at +last." + +"It shall come, ay, and by this baud!" exclaimed Percy, striking his +clenched hand violently on the table; "if his conduct be such. You speak +coolly, Herbert, but you know not all, therefore I forgive you: it is +the conduct of a villain, ay, and he shall know it too. Before three +suns have set again, he shall feel my sister has an avenger!" + +"His schemes against the peace, the honour of the innocent are +registered on high; be calm, be satisfied, Percy. His last hour will be +chastisement enough." + +"By heaven, it shall be!" retorted Percy, passion increasing, it +appeared, at every gentle word his brother spoke, and irritating him +beyond control. "Herbert, you will drive me mad with this mistimed +calmness; you know not half the injury she has received." + +"Whatever might have been his schemes, they have all failed, Percy, and +therefore should we not rather feel thankful for Caroline's restoration +to her home, to herself, than thus encourage fury against him from whose +snares she has escaped?" + +"Yes; and though his base plan, thanks to my sister's strength of mind, +or, rather, my mother's enduring counsel, has not succeeded, am I to sit +calmly by and see her health, spirits, alike sinking beneath that love +which the deceiving villain knew so well how to call forth? am I to see +this, to gaze on the suffering he has caused, unmoved, and permit him to +pass unscathed, as if his victim had neither father nor brother to +protect and avenge her injured honour?" + +"Her honour is not injured. She is as innocent and as pure as before +Lord Alphingham addressed her. Percy, you are increasing this just +displeasure by imaginary causes. I do not believe it to be love for him +that occasions her present suffering; I think, from the conversations we +have had, it is much more like remorse for the past, and bitter grief +that the confidence of our parents must, spite of their excessive +kindness, be for a time entirely withdrawn, not any lingering affection +for Alphingham." + +"Whatever it be, he is the primary cause. Not injured! every word of +love from his lips is pollution; his asking her of my father an +atrocious insult; his endeavours to fly with her a deadly sin--an +undying stain." + +Herbert shuddered involuntarily. + +"What would you say, or mean?" he exclaimed. + +"What have you heard or known concerning him, that calls for words like +these?" + +"Ask me not, as you love me; it is enough I know he is a villain," and +Percy continued his rapid walk. Herbert rose from his seat and +approached him. + +"Percy," he said, "my dear brother, tell me what is it you would do? to +what would this unwonted passion lead? Oh, let it not gain too great a +dominion, Percy. Dear Percy, what would you do?" + +"I would seek him, Herbert," replied Percy, "where ever he is; by whom +surrounded. I would taunt him as a deceiving, heartless villain, and if +he demand satisfaction, by heaven, it would be joy for me to give it!" + +"Has passion, then, indeed obtained so much ascendancy, it would be joy +for you to meet him thus for blood?" demanded Herbert, fixing his large, +melancholy eyes intently on Percy's face, on which the cloud was +becoming darker, and his step even more rapid. "Would you seek him for +the purpose of exciting anger like your own? is it thus you would avenge +my sister?" + +"Thus, and only thus," answered Percy, with ungoverned fury. "As others +have done; man to man I would meet him, and villain as he is, I would +have honourable vengeance for the insult, not only to my sister, but to +us all. Why should I stay my hand?" + +"Why? because on you more than on many others has the light of our +blessed religion dawned," answered Herbert, calmly; "because you know +what others think not of, that the law of our Master forbiddeth blood; +that whosoever sheds it, on whatever plea, his shall be demanded in +return; because you know, in seeking vengeance by blood, His law is +disobeyed, and His vengeance you would call upon yourself. Percy, you +will not, you dare not act as this overwhelming passion dictates." + +"Dare not," repeated the young man, light flashing from his eye as if +his spirit chafed at that word, even from his brother, "dare not; you +mistake me, Herbert. I will not sit tamely down beneath an injury such +as this. I will not see that villain triumph without one effort to prove +to him that he is known, and make the whole world know him as he is." + +"And would a hostile meeting accomplish this? Would that proclaim his +villainy, of whatever nature it may be, to the world? Would they not +rather side with him, their present minion, and even bring forward your +unjustifiable conduct as a fresh proof in his favour? How would they +give credit to the terms they may hear you apply to him, when even in +your family you speak not of the true cause of this strange agitation +and indignant anger." + +Percy continued to pace the room for some minutes without answering. + +"My honour has been insulted in the person of my sister," he muttered, +at length, as if speaking more to himself than to his brother; "and am I +to bear that calmly? Were the truth made known, would not the whole +world look on me with scorn as a spiritless coward, to whom the law of +honour was as nothing; who would see his sister suffering from the arts +of a miscreant, without one effort to revenge her?" + +"The law of honour," replied Herbert, bitterly; "it is the law of blood, +of murder, of wilful, uncalled-for murder. Percy, my brother, banish +these guilty thoughts. Do not be one of those misguided beings who, +from that false deceiving plea, the law of honour, condemn whole +families to misery, and themselves, without preparation, without prayer, +nay, in the very act of disobeying a sacred commandment of their God, +rush heedless into His presence, into awful eternity." + +He paused, but not vainly had he spoken. Percy gazed on his brother's +features with greater calmness, and more kindly, but still impetuously, +said-- + +"Would you then have me stand calmly by and behold my sister a suffering +victim to his arts, though actual sin, thank God, has been spared, and +thus permit that villain Alphingham to continue his course triumphant?" + +"Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord, and I will repay it," answered +Herbert, instantly, twining his arm within that of his brother, and +looking up in his face with that beseeching glance of affection which +was so peculiar to his features. "Dear brother, rest on those words and +be contented. It is not for us to think of vengeance or to seek for +retribution; justice is, indeed, ours to claim, but in this case, there +is no point on which we can demand it. Let Alphingham, even granting you +know him as he is, pursue his course in peace. Did you endeavour to +inflict chastisement, is it not doubting the wisdom and justice of the +Almighty? And suppose you fell instead of your adversary, in the meeting +you would seek--what, think you, would be the emotions of all those who +so dearly love you, when they gazed on your bleeding corse, and +remembered you had sought death in defiance of every principle they had +so carefully instilled? Think of my mother's silent agony; has not +Caroline's conduct occasioned sufficient pain, and would you increase +it? you, whose most trifling action is dictated by love for her; you, in +whom she has every reason to look for so much virtue, honour, and +self-control; whom she so dearly, so devotedly loves? Remember what she +would feel; and, if no other consideration have effect, surely that will +bid you pause." + +Percy still paced the room, but his head was averted from his brother as +he spoke, and his step bespoke contending and painful emotions. He did +not answer when Herbert ceased to speak, but his brother knew him well, +and remained silent. + +"You have conquered, Herbert," he exclaimed at length, firmly clasping +his brother's hand in his and raising his head; anger still lingered on +his cheek, but his eye was softer. "I could not bear my mother's +wretchedness; I could not thus repay her love, her cherished care. I +will not seek this base and heartless man. I tremble for my present +resolution, if he chance to cross my path; but, for her sake, I will +avoid him; for her sake, his villainy shall be still concealed." + +"Endeavour to think of him more charitably, my dear Percy, or forget him +entirely, which you will." + +"Think of him charitably; him--a fashionable, fawning, seducing +hypocrite!" burst from Percy, in a tone of renewed passion. "No! the +gall he has created within me cannot yet be turned to sweetness; forget +him--that at least is impossible, when Caroline's coldness and reserve +remind me disagreeably of him every day. It is plain she looks on me as +the destroyer of her happiness; thinks, perhaps, had it not been for my +letter my father would have given his consent, and she might have +peacefully become the wife of Alphingham. It is hard to bear unkindness +from one whom I have endeavoured to preserve from ruin." + +"Nay, do not be unjust, Percy; are you not cool and reserved yourself? +How do we know why Caroline is somewhat more so than usual? Poor girl, +we may find excuses for her, but I know no reason why you should treat +her as you do." + +"Her whole conduct demands it. How did she use that noble fellow St. +Eval; encourage him, so that their union was confidently asserted, and +then reject him for no cause whatever; or, if she had a cause, for love +of a villain, who, it appears, in secret, possessed all the favour she +pretended to lavish on St. Eval,--both false and deceiving." + +"Percy, you are determined to be angry with everybody to-day. I +flattered myself my influence had allayed your passion, and behold, it +is only withdrawn from one object to be hurled upon another. Can you not +find some good cause now to turn it from Caroline on me? Is it nothing +that I should dare face the tempest of your wrath, and tell my impetuous +and headstrong brother exactly what I thought--nothing, that I should +have ventured to say there was a thing on earth you dared not do?" + +Percy turned sharply towards him, as if in that moment he could be angry +even with him; but Herbert met his fierce glance with a smile so full of +affectionate interest, that all Percy's displeasure and irritation +seemed at once removed. + +"Displeased with you!" exclaimed Percy, when involuntary admiration had +taken the place of anger, and unconsciously the noble serenity of +Herbert's temper appeared to soothe the more irritable nature of his +own. "Ay, Herbert, when we two have exchanged characters, such may be, +till then I am contented to love and reverence the virtue, the +gentleness I cannot make my own." + +"We are better thus, my brother," replied Herbert, feelingly; "were we +the same, could I have been the happy being you have made me at college? +Much, very much happiness do I owe to your high spirit, Percy. Without +your support, my life, spite of the charms of study, would have been a +painful void at college; and though I feel, you know not perhaps how +often and how bitterly, that in many things I cannot hope to be your +companion, yet to think my affection may sometimes check the violence +that would lead you wrong, oh, that is all I can hope for or desire." + +"Have you not my love, my confidence, my fondest, warmest esteem?" +exclaimed Percy, impetuously, and twining his arm, as in fondness he +often did, around his brother's neck. "Is there one among my gay +companions I love as you, though I appear to seek their society more?" + +Herbert was silent. + +"You do not doubt me, Herbert?" + +"Percy--no!" exclaimed the youth, with unwonted ardour. To speak more at +that moment he could not, and ere words came at his command, the library +door slowly opened, and Caroline languidly entered. + +Herbert somewhat hurriedly left the room, to conceal the agitation the +interview with Percy had occasioned him. + +For some little time Caroline remained in the library, seeking, it +appeared, a book, without a word passing between her and Percy. Both +evidently wished to speak, but neither liked to begin; at length +Caroline approached him. + +"Percy," she began, and her voice trembled sufficiently to prevent more. +Percy was softened. + +"Well, dear Caroline, am I so very terrible you cannot speak to me? I +have been angry and unjust, and you, perhaps, a little too reserved; so +now let us forgive and forget, as we did when we were children, and be +friends for the future." + +He spoke with all his natural frankness, and extended his hand towards +her. Caroline's spirits were so depressed, that the least word or token +of kindness overcame her, and pressing her brother's hand in both hers, +she turned away her head to conceal the quickly-starting tears, and +Percy continued, trying to smile-- + +"Well, Caroline, will you not tell me what you were going to say? I +cannot quite penetrate your thoughts." + +Again Caroline hesitated, but then with an effort she said, fixing her +heavy eyes on her brother's face-- + +"Percy, had you a real cause for writing to my father as you did some +few weeks ago, or was it rumour alone which actuated your doing so? I +implore you to answer me truly." + +"I had all-sufficient cause," he answered, instantly. "It was from no +rumour. Do you think that, without good reason, I would have endeavoured +to traduce the character of any man?" + +"And what was that cause? Why did you implore my father, as he valued my +future peace, not to expose me to his fascinations?" + +Caroline spoke slowly and deliberately, as if every word were weighed +ere it was uttered, but with an expression on her features, as if life +and peace depended on his answer. + +Percy looked earnestly at her. + +"Why should you ask this question, my dear sister?" he said. "If I +answer it, what good will it do? Why should I solve a mystery, that, if +you love this Alphingham, as this extreme depression bids me believe, +must bring but increase of pain?" + +"Percy," replied Caroline, raising her head, and standing with returning +dignity before him, "Percy, do not let the idea of my love bid you +hesitate. Increase of pain I do not think is possible; but yet, do not +mistake me, that pain does not spring from disappointed affection. +Percy, I do not love Lord Alphingham; I have been fascinated, and the +remembrance of the past still clings to me with remorse and suffering; +but I never loved him as, had I not been infatuated and blind, had I not +rejected the counsels and confidence of my mother, I might have loved +another. You know not how I have been led on, how I have permitted +myself to be but a tool in the hands of those whose independence I +admired, and aided them by my own reckless folly--the wish to prove, +however differently I was educated, still I could act with equal spirit. +Had it not been for that self-will, that perverse spirit, I might now +have been a happy and a virtuous wife, loving and esteeming that +superior being, whose affections I wilfully cast away; but that matters +not now," she added, hurriedly. "My mother was right, I was unworthy to +share his lot; but of this rest assured, I do not love, I never have +loved, for I cannot esteem Lord Alphingham." + +"But why then wish to know more concerning him?" Percy said, much +relieved by his sister's words, and more pleased than he chose to +appear by her allusion to St. Eval. "Is it not enough your connection +with him is entirely broken off?" + +"No, Percy; I have rejected him, dissolved our engagement, I scarcely +know wherefore, except that I felt I could not be his without my +father's consent; but there are times I feel as if I had treated him +unjustly, that I have had no cause to think ill of him; my conduct had +encouraged him. To me he has been devoted and respectful, and though I +could not, would not be his wife, yet these thoughts linger on my mind, +and add most painfully to the chaos already there." + +Twice Percy slowly traversed the room, with a countenance on which +anxious thought was deeply imprinted. He paused opposite to Caroline, +took both her hands in his, and spoke in a voice which, though low, was +so solemn that it thrilled to her inmost soul. + +"Caroline, I had hoped the fatal secret made known to me would never +have passed my lips, but for the restoration of your peace it shall be +divulged, nor will the injured one who first intrusted it to me, to +preserve you from ruin, believe I have betrayed her trust. You have not +suspected the whole extent of evil that would have been yours, had you +indeed fled with that hypocritical villain. Caroline, Lord Alphingham is +a married man--his wife still lives!" + +Had a thunderbolt fallen at her feet, or the earth yawned beneath her, +not more pale or transfixed would Caroline have stood than she did as +those unexpected words fell clear and shrill as a trumpet-blast upon her +tortured ear. Amid all her conjectures as to the meaning of Percy's +words, this idea had never crossed her mind; that Alphingham could thus +have deliberately been seeking her ruin, under the guise of love and +honour, was a stretch of villainy that entered not into her conception. +Now that the truth was known, she stood as if suddenly turned to marble, +her cheek, her very lips bearing the colour of death. Then came the +thoughts of the past; had it not been for those recollections of her +childhood, her mother's love, devotion, what would she now have been? In +vain she struggled to bear up against that rushing torrent of thought; +every limb was seized with violent trembling, her brain reeled, and she +would have sunk to the ground, had not Percy, alarmed at the effect of +his words, led her tenderly to a seat, and kneeling by her side, threw +his arms around her. Her head sunk on his shoulder, and she clung to him +as if evil and guilt and wretchedness still hovered like fiends around +her, and he would protect her from them all. Fire again flashed from the +eyes of the young man as he thought on Alphingham, but for her sake he +restrained himself, and endeavoured by a few soothing words to calm her. + +"Tell me all--all you know, I can bear it," she said at length, almost +inaudibly, and looking up with features as deathlike as before. Percy +complied with her request, and briefly related as follows: + +He had become acquainted during his college life, he told her, with a +widow and her daughter, who lived about four or five miles from Oxford. +Some service he had rendered them, of sufficient importance as to make +him an ever welcome and acceptable guest within the precincts of that +cottage, which proclaimed a refined and elevated taste, although its +inmates were not of the highest class. Both Percy fancied were widows, +although he scarcely knew the foundation of that fancy, except the +circumstance of their living together, and the husband of the younger +lady never appearing; nor was his name ever mentioned in the +confidential conversations he sometimes had with them, which the service +he had had in his power to do demanded. Mrs. Amesfort, the daughter, +still possessed great beauty, which a shade of pensive thought, +sometimes amounting to deep melancholy, rendered even more lovely. Her +age might have been six or seven and twenty, she could not have been +more. At an earlier age, there was still evidence that she had been a +sparkling, lively girl, and her mother would frequently relate to the +young man the change that sorrow--and sorrow, she hinted, of a +peculiarly painful nature--had made in one who, ten years previous, had +been so full of life and glee. Decline, slow but sure, it seemed even to +Percy's inexperienced eye, was marked on her pale features; and at those +times when bodily suffering was greatest, her spirit would resume a +portion of its former lightness, as if it rejoiced in the anticipated +release. There was a deep thrilling melody in her voice, whether in +speaking or, when strength allowed, in warbling forth the pathetic airs +of her native land; for Agnes Amesfort was a child of Erin, once +enthusiastic, warm, devoted, as were her countrywomen--possessing +feelings that even beneath that pale, calm exterior would sometimes +burst forth and tinge her cheek, and light up her soul-speaking eye with +momentary but brilliant radiance, and whispered too clearly what she had +once been, and what was now the wreck. + +The gaiety, the frankness, and unassuming manner of Percy rendered him a +most acceptable visitant at Isis Lodge, so the cottage was called; he +was ever ready with some joyous tale, either of Oxford or of the +metropolis, to bring a smile even to the lips of Mrs. Amesfort. It was +not likely that he should so frequently visit the cottage without +exciting the curiosity and risibility of his college companions; but he +was enabled cheerfully and with temper to withstand it all, feeling +secure in his own integrity, and confident that the situation in which +he stood relative to the inmates of that cottage was mutually +understood. Several inquiries Percy made concerning these interesting +females; but no intelligence of their former lives could he obtain; they +had only settled in the cottage a few months previous to the period of +his first acquaintance with them; and whence they came, and who they +were, no one knew nor cared to know. It was enough for the poor for many +miles round, that the assistance of the strangers was extended towards +them, with kind words and consolation in their troubles; and for the +Oxonians, that though they received with extreme and even grateful +politeness the visits made them, they were never returned. + +One little member of this small family Percy had not mentioned, a little +girl, who might have been about eight or nine years old, an interesting +child, whom Percy had saved from a watery grave in the rapid Isis, which +rolled at the base of the grounds; a child, in whom the affections of +her widowed mother were centred with a force and intensity, that it +appeared death itself could but divide; and she was, indeed, one to +love--affectionate, and full of glee; yet the least sign of increased +suffering on the part of her mother would check the wild exuberance of +childish spirits, without diminishing in the least her cheerfulness, and +she would throw her arms around her neck, and fondly ask, if she might +by kisses while away the pain. Many a game of play did she have with her +preserver, whose extreme kindness and excessive liveliness excited the +affections of the child, and increased and preserved the gratitude his +courageous conduct had occasioned in the bosom of that young devoted +mother, whose every earthly joy was centred in her fatherless child. + +It happened that in speaking one day of London society, and of the +reigning belles and beaux of the season, that Percy casually mentioned +the name of Lord Alphingham, whom he declared was by all accounts so +overwhelmed with attentions and flatteries, since his return from a nine +years' residence on the Continent, that there was every chance of his +being thoroughly spoiled, if he were not so already, and losing every +grain of sense, if he had any to lose. He was surprised, as he spoke, at +the very visible agitation of the elder lady, whose colour went and came +so rapidly, that involuntarily he turned towards her daughter, wondering +if any such emotion were visible in her; and though she did not appear +paler than usual, nor was any outward emotion visible, save that her arm +was somewhat tightly bound round the tiny figure of the little Agnes, he +almost started, as he met those large soft eyes fixed full upon him, as +if they would penetrate his soul; and though her voice was calm, +unhesitating, and firm, as she asked him if he were acquainted with Lord +Alphingham, yet its tones sounded even more thrilling, more sadly than +usual. He answered truly in the negative, adding, he was not ambitious +of his acquaintance; as a man, he was not one to suit his fancy. Many +questions did Mrs. Amesfort ask relative to this nobleman, and still +unconsciously her arm held her child more closely to her side. The elder +lady's looks were bent on them both, expressive, it seemed to Percy, of +fondness for those two beloved objects, and struggling with indignation +towards another. Percy returned to college that evening unusually +thoughtful. What could Lord Alphingham have to do with the inhabitants +of that simple cottage? Incoherent fancies occupied his mind, but from +all which presented themselves as solutions to the mystery his pure mind +revolted; and, compelled by an impulse he could not resist, he continued +to speak of Alphingham every time he visited the cottage. Mrs. Amesfort, +it appeared to him, rather encouraging than checking his conversation on +that subject, by introducing it herself, and demanding if his name were +still mentioned in Percy's letters from town. Mrs. Morley, her mother, +ever looked anxiously at her, as if she could have wished the subject +unnamed; but still Alphingham continued to be the theme so constantly +discussed at Isis Lodge, that Percy felt no repugnance in mentioning +those reports which allied his sister's name with that of the Viscount. +Again were the eyes of Mrs. Amesfort fixed intently on his face, and she +spoke but little more during that evening's visit. Percy left her, +unable to account for the deep and serious thought imprinted on her +features, nor the look with which she bade him seek her the following +day at an appointed hour, as she earnestly wished to speak with him +alone. The day passed heavily till he was again with her. She was alone; +and steady determination more than ever marked on her clear and polished +brow. She spoke, and Percy listened, absorbed; she alluded to his +preservation of her child, and, in that moment of reawakened gratitude, +all the enthusiasm of her country spoke in her eyes and voice; and then +a moment she paused, and a bright and apparently painful flush mounted +to those cheeks which Percy had ever seen so pale. She implored his +forbearance with her; his pardon, at what might appear an unwarrantable +interference on her part in the affairs of his family; but his many and +eloquent descriptions of them, particularly of his mother, had caused an +interest that compelled her to reveal a fatal secret which, she had +hoped, would never have passed her lips. Was it a mere rumour, or were +Lord Alphingham's attentions marked and decided towards his sister? +Percy believed there was very good foundation for the rumours he had +heard. + +Did his parents approve of it? she again asked, and the flush of +excitement faded. Percy was not quite sure; he rather thought by his +mother's letters she did not, though Caroline was universally envied as +an object of such profound attention from one so courted and admired. +Did his sister love him?--the words appeared wrung with a violent effort +from Mrs. Amesfort's lips. + +He did not fancy she did as yet; but he doubted not the power of Lord +Alphingham's many fascinations and exclusive devotion to herself, on one +naturally rather susceptible to vanity as was Caroline. + +"Oh, if you love your sister, save her ere it be too late, ere her +affections are engaged," was Mrs. Amesfort's reply, with a burst of +emotion, the more terrible, from its contrast with her general calm and +unmoved demeanour. "Expose her not to those fascinations which I know no +heart can resist. Let her not associate with him--with my husband; he +is not free to love--I am his lawful wife; and the child you saved is +his--his own--the offspring of lawfully-hallowed wedlock; though he has +cast me off, though his eyes have never gazed upon my child, yet, yet we +are his. No cruel words of separation has the law of England spoken. But +do not, oh! if you have any regard for me," she continued, wildly +seizing both Percy's hands, as she marked the dark blood of passion +kindling on the young man's brow, "do not betray him; do not let him +know that his wife--his injured wife--has risen to cry shame upon him, +and banish him from those circles wherein he is formed to mingle. +Promise me faithfully, solemnly, you will not betray my secret more than +is necessary to preserve your sister from misery and ruin. I thought +even for her I could not have spoken thus, but I gazed on my child, and +remembered she too has a mother, whose happiness is centred in her as +mine is in my Agnes, and I could hesitate no more. Promise me you will +not abuse my confidence, Mr. Hamilton, promise me; let me not have the +misery of reproaches from him to whom my fond heart still clings, as it +did at first. Yes; though for nine long weary years I have never seen +his face nor heard his voice, still he knows not, guesses not how his +image dwells within, how faithfully, how fervidly he is still beloved. +Promise me my existence shall not be suspected, that neither he nor any +one shall know the secret of my existence. It is enough for me he lives, +is happy. My child! could I but see her in the station her rank +demands,--but, oh, I would not force her on her father." + +She would still have spoken, still have entreated, but this unwonted +emotion had exhausted her feeble strength. Greatly moved by this +extraordinary disclosure, and struck with that deep devotedness, that +undying love, Percy solemnly pledged his word to preserve her secret. + +"My course will soon be over, my sand run out," she said, after +energetically thanking him for his soothing and relieving words, and in +a tone of such sad, resigned hopelessness, that, irritated as he felt +towards Alphingham, his eye glistened and his lips quivered. "And +wherefore should I dash down his present enjoyment by standing forward +and proclaiming myself his wife? Why should I expose my secret sorrows, +my breaking heart to the inspection of a cold and heartless world, and +draw down on my dying moments his wrath, for the poor satisfaction of +beholding myself recognised as Viscountess Alphingham? Would worldly +honours supply the place of his affection? Oh, no, no! I am better as I +am. The tears of maternal and filial love will hallow my grave; and he, +too, when he knows for his sake, to save him a pang, I have suffered my +heart to break in uncomplaining silence, oh, he too may shed one tear, +bestow a thought on one who loved him to the last!" + +"But your child!" exclaimed Percy, almost involuntarily. + +"Will be happier here, under my mother's care, unconscious of her birth, +than mingling in a dangerous world, without a mother to cherish and +protect her. Her father might neglect, despise her; she might be a bar +to a second and a happier union, and oh, I could not die in peace did I +expose her thus." + +Percy was silent, and when the interview had closed, he bade that +devoted woman farewell, with a saddened and deeply thoughtful brow. + +Lord Alphingham had been a student in Dublin, in the environs of which +city dwelt Mrs. Morley, a widow, and this her only child. At their +cottage he became a constant and devoted guest, and as might have been +expected, his impetuous and headstrong nature became desperately +enamoured of the beautiful and innocent Agnes, then only seventeen. +Spite of his youth, being barely twenty, neither mother nor daughter +could withstand his eloquent solicitations, and a private but sacred +marriage was performed. He quitted college, but still lingered in +Ireland, till a peremptory letter from his father summoned him to +England, to celebrate his coming of age. He left his bride, and the +anguish of parting was certainly at that time mutual. Some few months +Agnes hoped for and looked to his return. Alphingham, then Lord +Amesfort, on his part, was restrained only by the fear of the inveteracy +of his father's disposition from confessing his marriage, and sending +for his wife. Another bride, of rank and wealth, was proposed to him, +and then he confessed the truth. The fury of the old man knew no bounds, +and he swore to disinherit his son, if he did not promise never to +return to his ignoble wife, whom he vowed he never would acknowledge. +Amesfort promised submission, fully intending to remain constant till +his father's death, which failing health proclaimed was not far distant, +and then seek his gentle wife, and introduce her in her proper sphere. +He wrote to this effect, and the boding heart of Agnes sunk at once; in +vain her mother strove to rouse her energies, by alluding to the strain +of his letter, the passionate affection breathing in every line, the +sacred nature of his promise. She felt her doom, and ere her child was +six months old, her feelings, ominous of evil, were fully verified. + +Lord Alphingham lingered some time, and his son found in the society in +which the Viscount took good care he should continually mingle, +attractions weighty enough to banish from his fickle heart all love, and +nearly all recollection of his wife. He found matrimony would be very +inconvenient in the gay circle of which he was a member. All the better +feelings and qualities of his youth fled; beneath the influence of +example and bad companionship his evil ones were called forth and +fostered, and speedily he became the heartless libertine we have seen +him. His letters to the unfortunate Agnes were less and less frequent, +and at length ceased altogether, and the sum transmitted for her use +every year was soon the only proof that he still lived. His residence in +foreign lands, the various names he assumed, baffled all her efforts at +receiving the most distant intelligence concerning him, and Agnes still +lingered in hopeless resignation--"The heart will break, but brokenly +live on;" and thus it was she lived, existing for her child alone. Nine +years they had been parted, and Agnes had ever shrunk in evident pain +from quitting her native land, and the cottage which had been the scene +of her brief months of happiness; but when change of air was pleaded in +behalf of her child, then suffering from lingering fever, when change of +climate was strongly recommended by the physicians, in secret for +herself equally with that of her little girl, she hesitated no longer, +and a throb of mingled pain and pleasure swelled her too fond heart as +her foot pressed the native land of her husband. Some friends of her +mother, unacquainted with her sad story, resided near Oxford, and +thither they bent their steps, and finally fixed their residence, where +Mrs. Amesfort soon had the happiness of beholding her child restored to +perfect health and radiant in beauty; perhaps the faint hope that +Alphingham might one day unconsciously behold his daughter, reconciled +her to this residence in England. She was in his own land; she might +hear of him, of his happiness; and, deeply injured as she was, that +knowledge, to her too warm, too devoted heart was all-sufficient. + +Such were the particulars of the story which Percy concisely yet fully +related in confidence to his sister. Caroline neither moved nor spoke +during his recital; her features still retained their deadly paleness, +and her brother almost involuntarily felt alarmed. A few words she said, +as he ceased, in commentary on his tale, and her voice was calm. Nor did +her step falter as she quitted the library, and returned to her own +room, when, carefully closing the door, she sunk on the nearest seat, +and covering her eyes with her hands, as if to shut out all outward +objects, gave unchecked dominion to the incongruous thoughts occasioned +by Percy's tale. She could not define or banish them; a sudden +oppression appeared cast upon her brain, deadening its powers, and +preventing all relief from tears. The ruin, the wretchedness from which +she had been mercifully preserved stood foremost in her mind, all else +appeared a strange and frightful dream. The wife and child of Alphingham +flitted like mocking phantoms before her eyes, and the countenance of +Alphingham himself glared at her, and his gibing laugh seemed to scream +in her ears, and transform him into a malignant fiend revelling in the +misery he had created. She strove to pray but vainly; no words of such +soothing and consoling import rose to her lips. How long she remained in +this state of wretchedness she knew not, but it was the mild accents of +her mother's voice that roused her from her trance. + +"Are you not well, Caroline? What is the matter, love?" Mrs. Hamilton +asked, alarmed at the icy coldness of her daughter's hand, and kissing, +as she spoke, her pallid cheek. + +Caroline threw her arms round her, and a violent flood of tears relieved +the misery from which she was suffering so painfully. + +"Do not ask me to reveal the cause of this weakness, my dearest mother," +she said, when voice returned. "I shall be better now, and never, never +again shall recollections of the past, by afflicting me, cause you +solicitude. Do not fancy this apparent grief has anything to do with +regret at my late decision, or for still lingering affection; oh, no, +no. Do not look at me so anxiously, mother; I have had a long, long +conversation with Percy, and that has caused the weakness you perceive; +but it will soon pass away, and I shall be your own happy Caroline +again." + +Tears were still stealing from those bloodshot eyes; but she looked up +in Mrs. Hamilton's face with an expression of such confiding affection, +that her mother's anxious fears were calmed. She would not inquire more, +nor question Percy, when he sought her in her boudoir before dinner, to +request that no notice might be taken, if his sister's manner were that +evening less calm than usual. Mrs. Hamilton felt thankful that an +understanding had taken place between her children, whose estrangement +had been a source of severe pain, and she waited trustingly and calmly +for time to do its work on the torn heart and agitated nerves of +Caroline. To Emmeline's extreme delight, preparations for their +departure from London and return to Oakwood were now proceeding in good +earnest. Never did that fair and innocent face look more joyous and +animated, and never had her laugh been more glad and ringing than when +the carriage rolled away from Berkeley Square. Every circumstance of +their journey increased her childlike glee, every town they passed +through an object of interest, and even the pensive features of her +cousin Ellen reflected her unchecked joyousness. They seldom travelled +more than forty miles a day, and consequently it was not till the +evening of the fourth they neared the village, whose inhabitants, clad +in holiday attire, stood at the doors of their houses to receive them, +with silent and respectful yet very evident tokens of joy. The evening +was most lovely; the sun had lost the splendour of its beams, though +clouds of every brilliant hue proclaimed the increased glory which +attended its hour of rest, at times lost behind a richly glowing cloud, +and then bursting forth again and dyeing all nature with a flood of +gold. The river lay calmly sleeping before them, while on its glassy +bosom the heavens cast their radiance, relieved by the shade of the +mighty trees that stood to guard its banks; the rich foliage of the +trees, the superb green of the fields, in some of which the ripening +corn was beginning to stud with gold, the varied flowers gemming the +fertile hedge, the holy calmness of this summer eve, all called forth +the best feelings of the human heart. For a few minutes even Emmeline +was silent, and then her clear silvery voice was heard chanting, as if +by an irresistible impulse, the beautiful hymn of the Tyrolese, so +peculiarly appropriate to the scene. On, on they went, the white walls +of the church peeping through clustering ivy, the old and venerable +rectory next came in sight; a few minutes more, and the heavy gates of +Oakwood were thrown wide to receive them, and the carriages swept along +the well-known entrance. Every tree and shrub, and even flower, were now +looked on by Emmeline and Percy with increased and somewhat boisterous +expressions of delight. + +"Try if you cannot be still a very short time longer, dear Emmeline," +whispered the more restrained Ellen, whose eye had caught a glimpse of +Caroline's countenance, and who perceived in an instant her feelings +were not in unison with Emmeline's. She was right; Caroline could not +feel as did her sister. She was not the same light-hearted, innocent +being she had been when she quitted Oakwood; the appearance of the home +of her childhood vividly recalled all that had occurred since she had +mingled in the world, that world of which she had indulged so many +brilliant visions; and while Entmeline's laugh conveyed gladness in that +hour to all who heard it, Caroline leaned forward to conceal from her +companions the tears that stole silently down her cheek. + +A shout from Percy proclaimed the old hall in sight. A group of +domestics stood on the steps, and the setting sun threw its brilliant +hues on the mansion, as if with increased and unusual lustre that +venerable spot should welcome the return of the Hamilton family within +its sheltering walls. + + + + +CHAPTER IX. + + +"There wants but the guardian spirit of yon old Manor to render this +scene as perfect as her society would bid the present hours roll on in +unalloyed felicity to me," was Herbert Hamilton's observation some +little time after their return to Oakwood, as he stood, arm in arm with +his friend Arthur Myrvin, on the brow of a hill which overlooked, among +other beautiful objects, Greville Manor, now inhabited by strangers. + +Young Myrvin smiled archly, but ere their walk that evening was +concluded, he too had become interested in the being so dear to his +friend; for Herbert spoke in perfect confidence, secure of friendly +sympathy. Oakwood was to him as dear, perhaps even dearer than to +Emmeline, for his nature and tastes were not such as any amusement in +London could gratify. His recreation from the grave studies necessary +for the profession which he had chosen, was to wander forth with a +congenial spirit, and marking Nature in all her varied robes, adore his +Creator in His works as well as in His word. In London his ever active +mind longed intensely to do good, and his benevolent exertions +frequently exceeded his strength; it was his chief delight to seek the +dwellings of the poor, to relieve distress, alleviate affliction. The +prisoner in his cell, the bold and wilful transgressor of the laws of +God, these would he teach, and by gentle admonitions bring nearer to the +Throne of Grace. Yet notwithstanding the gratification which the +pursuits of Herbert gave to his parents, they often felt considerable +anxiety lest his health should suffer from his unceasing efforts, and +they rejoiced on that account when their removal to Oakwood afforded +their son a quieter and more healthful field of occupation. For miles +around Oakwood the name of Herbert Hamilton was never spoken without a +blessing. There he could do good; there he could speak of God, and +behold the fruits of his pious labours; there was Mr. Howard ever ready +to guide and to sympathise, and there was the field of Nature spread +before him to fill his heart with increased and glowing adoration and +reverential love. + +It was well for Herbert his parents were such as could understand and +sympathise in these exalted feelings; had harshness, or even neglect, +been extended over his childhood and his opening youth, happiness, such +as had gilded his life, would never have been his. + +As Emmeline had rejoiced, so also might have Herbert, as they neared the +gates of his home, had there not been one recollection to dim his +happiness. She who had shared in all his pleasures, who had shed a charm +over that spot, a charm which he had never felt so keenly as when he +looked for it, and found it not; the favourite playfellow of his +infancy, the companion of his youth, his plighted bride, she was in far +distant lands, and vainly on his first return home did Herbert struggle +to remove the weight of loneliness resting on his heart; he never +permitted it to be apparent, for to his family he was the same devoted +son and affectionate brother he had ever been, but painfully he felt it. +Mr. Myrvin and his son were now both inmates of Mr. Hamilton's family. +The illegality of the proceedings against the former, in expelling him +from his ministry of Llangwillan, had now been clearly proved, for the +earnestness of Mr. Hamilton permitted no delay; and tears of pious +gratitude chased down the cheeks of the injured man, as he recognised in +the person of his benefactor the brother of the suffering woman whom he +had sheltered, and whose bed of death he had deprived of its sting. The +persuasions of Mr. Hamilton succeeded in conquering his objections to +the plan, and he consented to make Oakwood his home for a short time, +ere he once more settled in his long-loved rectory. + +With Arthur, Ellen speedily resumed her place; the remembrance of that +neglected little girl had never left Mr. Myrvin's mind, and when, +radiant in animation and returning health and happiness, she hastily, +almost impetuously, advanced to meet him, he pressed her to his bosom +with the affection of a father; and even as a daughter Ellen devoted +herself to him during his residence at Oakwood. He had been the first in +England to treat her with kindness; he had soothed her childish sorrow, +and cheered her painful duties; he had been the first since her father's +death to evince interest for her, and though so many years had passed, +that the little girl was fast verging into womanhood, yet such things +were not forgotten, and Ellen endeavoured to prove the gratitude which +time had not effaced. + +Ellen was happy, her health almost entirely restored; but it was +scarcely possible for any observant person to live with her for any +time, without noticing the expression of pensive melancholy, of subdued +spirit, unnatural in one still so very young, that, unless animated by +any casual circumstances, ever rested on her features. Mr. Myrvin soon +noticed this, and rather wondered such should still be, when surrounded +by so much kindness and affection. Her gentleness and controlled temper, +her respectful devotion to her aunt and uncle, were such as to awaken +his warmest regard, and cause him to regret that shade of remaining +sadness so foreign to her age. Traces of emotion were so visible on her +cheeks one day, returning from a walk with Mr. Myrvin, that Mrs. +Hamilton felt convinced the tale of the past had been told, and fearing +her niece had done herself injustice, she scrupled no longer in alluding +to it herself. Mr. Myrvin was deeply affected at the tale, and much +relieved when the whole was known; for when he had praised her general +conduct, and approved of so many feelings and sentiments she had +acknowledged, and then tenderly demanded the cause of that depression he +sometimes witnessed, Ellen had given vent to a violent burst of emotion, +and spoken of a sin, a fearful sin, which long years of probation alone +could wash away. Her strong, her terrible temptation, her extreme +wretchedness and dreadful sufferings she had not mentioned, and, +consequently, when known, an air of even more gentle and more +affectionate interest pervaded Mr. Myrvin's manner towards her. Hearing +her one day express an ardent desire once more to visit Llangwillan, to +see again her mother's grave, he earnestly entreated Mrs. Hamilton's +permission for her to visit him for a few weeks: her company would, he +said, indeed shed joy over his home, and afford much pleasure to a +widowed sister who resided with him. Mrs. Hamilton smilingly consented, +and a flush of animated pleasure dyed Ellen's cheeks at the proposal. +For about a quarter of an hour she was all delight and animation, when +suddenly a thought entered her mind, banishing her unusual mirth, and +filling her eyes with tears. Her voice faltered audibly, as she warmly +thanked Mr. Myrvin and her aunt for their wish to increase her +happiness, but she would rather not leave home that year. The change was +so sudden, her manner so contradictory to her words, that Mrs. Hamilton, +believing some fanciful reason existed, would have insisted on her +compliance, and playfully accused her of unfounded caprice. There was, +however, a degree of earnest entreaty in her manner, that Mr. Myrvin +would not combat, and he expressed himself contented with her promise +for the following year. Mrs. Hamilton was not, however, quite so easily +satisfied. Ellen had been latterly so open with her, that anything like +concealment in her conduct gave her some little uneasiness; but she +could not withstand the imploring look of her niece, as she entreated +her not to think her capricious and wilful; she was sure Mrs. Hamilton +would approve of her reason, did she confess it. + +"I am not quite so sure of that," was her aunt's smiling reply; "but, +however, I will trust you, though I do not like mysteries," and the +subject was dismissed. + +The manners and conversation of Arthur Myrvin were such as to prepossess +both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton very much in his favour, and strengthened the +opinion they had already formed concerning him, on the word of their +son. The respectful deference with which he ever treated Caroline and +Emmeline often caused a laugh at his expense from Percy, but gratified +Mrs. Hamilton; Percy declared he stood as much in awe of his sisters as +if they were the highest ladies in the land. Arthur bore his raillery +with unruffled temper, but he felt the distance that fortune placed +between him and those fair girls, and he hoped, by reserve, to lessen +the danger that might in their society attack his peace. Emmeline +mistook this cautious reserve for coldness and distaste towards women, +and, with the arts of a playful child, she frequently endeavoured to +draw him from his abstraction, and render him a more agreeable +companion. + +There was still so very much of the child in Emmeline, though now +rapidly approaching her eighteenth birthday, she was still so very young +in manners and appearance, that the penetration of Mrs. Hamilton must +not be too severely criticised, if it failed in discovering that +intimately mingled with this childlike manner--the warm enthusiasm of a +kind nature--was a fund of deep reflection, and feelings quite equal to +her age. Mrs. Hamilton fancied the realities of life were still to her a +dream. Had any one spoken to her of the marriage of Emmeline as soon +taking place, she would have started at the idea, as a thing for some +years impossible; and that her affections might become engaged--that the +childlike, innocent, joyous Emmeline, whose gayest pleasures still +consisted in chasing with wild glee the butterflies as they sported on +the summer flowers, or tying garlands of the fairest buds to adorn her +own or her sister's hair, or plucking the apples from the trees and +throwing them to the village children as they sauntered at the orchard +gate--whose graver joys consisted in revelling in every poet that her +mother permitted her to read, or making her harp resound with wild, +sweet melody--whose laugh was still so unchecked and gay--that such a +being could think of love, of that fervid and engrossing passion, which +can turn the playful girl into a thinking woman, Mrs. Hamilton may be +pardoned if she deemed it as yet a thing that could not be; and she, +too, smiled at the playful mischief with which Emmeline would sometimes +claim the attention of young Myrvin, engage him in conversation, and +then, with good-humoured wit and repartee, disagree in all he said, and +compel him to defend his opinions with all the eloquence he possessed. + +With Ellen, young Myrvin was more at his ease; he recalled the days that +were past, and never felt with her the barrier which his sensitive +delicacy had placed between himself and her cousins. Arthur was proud, +more so than he was aware of himself. He would have considered himself +more humbled to love and sue for one raised by fortune or rank above +him, than in uniting with one, who in both these essentials was his +inferior. He was ambitious, but for honours and station obtained by his +own endeavours not conferred by another. From his earliest youth he had +grown up with so strong an impression that he was intended for the +Church, that he considered it impossible any other profession could suit +him better. When he mingled intimately at college with young men of +higher rank and higher hopes, he discovered too late that a clergyman's +life was not such as to render him most happy; but he could not draw +back, he would not so disappoint his father. He felt and knew, to obtain +the summit of his desires, to be placed in a public situation, where his +ambition would have full scope, required a much larger fortune than his +father possessed. He clothed himself in what he believed to be +resignation and contentment, but which was in truth a morbid +sensitiveness to his lot in life, which he imagined poverty would +separate from every other. Association with Herbert Hamilton, to whom in +frankness he confided these secret feelings, did much towards removing +their bitterness; and the admiration which he felt for Herbert, whose +unaffected piety and devotion to the Church he could not fail to +appreciate, partially reconciled his ambitious spirit to his station. +Yet the exalted ideas of Herbert were not entirely shared by Arthur, +whose thoughts were centred in a more stirring field of usefulness than +it would in all probability be his to fill. Herbert combated these +objections with so much eloquence, he pointed with such ardent zeal to +the crown eternal that would be his, when divine love had triumphed over +all earthly ambition, and his duties were done for love of Him, who had +ordained them, that when the time of his ordination came (which it did +very shortly after the commencement of this chapter), he would not have +drawn back, even had a more attractive profession been offered for his +acceptance. The friendship and countenance of Mr. Hamilton did much to +reconcile him to his lot. Mr. Howard's curate died suddenly, at the very +time that Mr. Hamilton was writing to the Marquis of Malvern, in +Arthur's favour, for a vacant living then at his disposal. Both now were +offered to the young man's choice, and Percy, even Mr. Hamilton himself, +were somewhat surprised that, without a moment's hesitation, he accepted +that under Mr. Howard, in the gift of Mr. Hamilton, inferior as it was +in point of worldly prospects to Lord Malvern's. His two parishes were +situated about nine or ten miles from Oakwood, and seven or eight from +Mr. Howard's rectory, and ere Mr. Myrvin returned to Llangwillan, he had +the satisfaction of seeing his son settled comfortably in his curacy, +performing his duties to the approval of his rector, and gaining by his +manner the affection of his parishioners. + +Herbert alone knew to its full extent the conquest his friend had +achieved over himself. His inclination led him to ambitious paths, where +he might in time obtain the notice of and mingle in the highest ranks; +but when the innate nobleness of his mind showed him where his duty lay, +when conscience loudly whispered now was the time to redeem the errors +of his college life, to prove his reverence for his father, to preserve +the kindness of those friends, exalted alike by rank and virtue, with +whom he still might mingle, with a strong effort he banished all +ambitious wishes, and devoted himself heart and soul to his ministerial +duties. + +Herbert would speak of his friend at home, of his self-conquering +struggles, till all would sympathise in the interest he so warmly +displayed, particularly Emmeline, with whom, sportive as she was, +Herbert from his childhood had had more thoughts and feelings in common +than he ever had with Caroline; and now, whether he spoke of Mary +Greville or Arthur Myrvin, in her he ever found a willing and attentive +auditor. Whenever he had ridden over to Hawthorndell, which he +frequently did, Emmeline would always in their next walk playfully draw +from him every particular of the "Lone Hermit," as in true poetic style +she termed Arthur. But there was no seriousness in her converse either +of or to young Myrvin. There was always mischief lurking in her +laughter-loving eye; always some wild joke betrayed in the arch smiles +ever lingering round her mouth; but mischief as it was, apparently the +mere wantonness of childhood, or very early youth, something in that +glance or smile ever bade young Myrvin's heart beat quicker than before, +and every pulse throb with what at first he deemed was pain. It was +relief to him to seek the quiet, gentle Ellen, and speak to her even as +he would to a sister, of all that had occurred to him since last they +met, so secure was he of sympathy in his future prospects, his present +cares and joys. But still that strange feeling lingered within his bosom +in his solitary hours, and he dwelt on it much more than on the gentle +accents of that fair girl whom in his boyhood he had termed his wife; +and stranger still, if it were pain, that it should urge him on to seek +it, that he could not rest till the glance of that eye, the tone of that +voice, had once more been seen and heard, till fresh excitement had been +given to thoughts and emotions which were unconsciously becoming the +mainsprings of his life. + +The undisturbed and happy calmness of Oakwood removed in a great measure +Caroline's painful feelings; all thoughts of Lord Alphingham were +gradually banished. The question how she could ever have been so blind +as to imagine that he had gained her affections, that she loved him, +returned more frequently than she could answer. + +But another vision stood forth to confront the darkened one of the +Viscount, and the contrast heightened the lustre of the former. Why had +she been so mad, so infatuated, as to reject with scorn and pride the +hand and heart of one so noble, so fond, so superior as Eugene St. Eval? +Now that the film had been removed from her eyes, that all the past +appeared in its true colours, that self-will and love of independence +had departed from her, the startling truth burst upon her mind, that +she had loved, truly loved, the very man who of all others would have +been the choice of both her parents--loved, and as his wife, might have +been one of the happiest, the most envied of her sex, had not that +indomitable spirit of coquetry urged her on, and lowered her to become a +very tool in the hands of the artful and designing Annie Grahame. + +Caroline loved; had she doubted the existence of that passion, every +letter from Mary Greville would have confirmed it; for we will not say +it was jealousy she felt, it was more self-condemnation and regret, +heightened at times almost into wretchedness. That St. Eval should so +soon forget her, that he should love again ere six months had passed, +could not fail to be a subject of bitter mortification to one in whose +bosom pride still rested. She would not have thus tormented herself with +turning and twisting Mary's information into such ideas, had she not +felt assured that he had penetrated her weakness, and despised her. +Fickleness was no part of St. Eval's character, of that she was +convinced; but it was natural he should cease to love, when he had +ceased to esteem, and in the society and charms of Louisa Manvers +endeavour to forget his disappointment. + +Through Emmeline's introductory letter, Lord St. Eval had become +sufficiently intimate with Mrs. Greville and Mary as to succeed in his +persuasions for them to leave their present residence, and occupy a +vacant villa on Lago Guardia, within a brief walk of Lord Delmont's, +feeling sure that an intimacy between Mrs. Manvers's family and that of +Mrs. Greville would be mutually pleasurable and beneficial; his friendly +wishes succeeded. Mrs. Greville found an able and sympathising +companion in the goodhearted, homely mother of the elegant and +accomplished Lord Delmont, and Mary's sadness was at once soothed and +cheered by the more animated Louisa, whose lot in life had never known +those murky clouds of sorrow and anxiety which had so often dimmed the +youth of Mary. The brother of Louisa had been all in all to her. She +felt as if life could not have another charm, as if not another joy was +wanting to render her lot perfect, until that other charm appeared, and +her ardent fancy quickly knew to its full extent the delights of female +companionship and sympathy. Their very dissimilitude of disposition +rendered dearer the ties of youthful friendship, and Emmeline sometimes +felt a pang of jealousy, as she read in the letters of her friend the +constant praises of Louisa Manvers, not that any diminution of early +affection breathed in them. Mary ever wrote so as to satisfy the most +exacting disposition; but it required all Mrs. Hamilton's eloquence to +persuade Emmeline she should rather rejoice than grieve that Mary had +found some one to supply her place. But vainly Emmeline tried in +playfulness to infect her brother Herbert with a portion of her +jealousy, for she knew not the contents of those letters Mary ever wrote +to Herbert, or she would not for one moment have imagined that either +Lord Delmont or St. Eval would usurp her brother's place. + +"Few things would give me greater pleasure," one of Mary's letters said, +"than to see the union of Lord St. Eval and my fair friend. It appears +to me strange that each, with affections disengaged, can remain blind to +the fascination of the other. They are well suited in every respect, +and I should fancy their union would certainly be a fair promise of +happiness. I live in hope, though as yet, I must confess, hope has but +very little to feed on." + +St. Eval still lingered at Monte Rosa, and it was well for the +inhabitants he did, for an event occurred which plunged that happy +valley from joy and gaiety into wailing and affliction, and even for a +brief interval infected the inhabitants of Oakwood with its gloom. Death +came, and tore away as his victim the widow's son, the orphan's brother. +The title of Delmont became extinct, for the last scion of that ancient +race had gone to his last home. He had gone with St. Eval and some other +young men on a fishing expedition, at some distance; a sudden squall had +arisen, and dispersing with much damage the little flotilla, compelled +the crews of each to seek their own safety. The sails of St. Eval's boat +were not furled quickly enough to escape the danger; it upset, and +though, after much buffeting and struggling with the angry waters, St. +Eval succeeded in bearing his insensible friend to land, his +constitution had received too great a shock, and he lingered but a few +brief weeks ere he was released from suffering. He had been thrown with +violence against a rock, producing a concussion of the brain, which, +combined with the length of time he was under water, produced fever, and +finally death. + +On the agony of the bereaved mother and sister it would be useless to +linger. St. Eval forgot his individual sorrows, and devoted himself, +heart and soul, in relieving those helpless sufferers, in which painful +task he was ably seconded by Mary and her mother, whose letters to their +friends at Oakwood, in that season of affliction, spoke of him in a +manner that, unconsciously to themselves, confirmed every miserable +suspicion in Caroline's mind, and even excited some such feeling in her +parents, whose disappointment was thus vividly recalled. That he should +ever seek their child again they deemed impossible, as did Caroline +herself; but still it was in vain they endeavoured to look with any +degree of pleasure to his union with another. + +Mr. Hamilton's family mourned Lord Delmont's early fate with sincere +regret, though they had known but little of him; but about this time the +thoughts of Mrs. Hamilton were turned in another direction, by a +circumstance which caused unaffected sorrow in her daughter and niece; +nor were she and her husband exempt. Lucy Harcourt had been so many +years a member of the family, she had been so associated from their +infancy in the affections of her pupils, that to part from her was the +bitterest pang of sorrow that Emmeline had yet known, and it was long +before Mrs. Hamilton herself could be reconciled to the idea of +separation; she had ever regarded and treated Miss Harcourt as a sister, +and intended that even when her family were settled, she should never +want another home. It was not only her own virtues that had endeared her +to Mrs. Hamilton; the services she had rendered her children, her active +and judicious share in the arduous task of education, demanded and +received from both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton the meed of gratitude and +esteem, and never once, in the seventeen years of Miss Harcourt's +residence amongst them, had they regretted the impulse which had offered +her a sheltering home and sympathising friends. + +Emmeline and Ellen were still her pupils, and Mrs. Hamilton intended +them to remain so for two or three years longer, even after they were +introduced, and it was on that account Miss Harcourt hesitated in +complying with the earnest entreaty of him whose happy home in her early +youth she had so nobly quitted, preferring to live by her own exertions +than to share the home of the man she loved, when he was married to +another. + +It had been very, very long ere disappointed affection had permitted her +to be cheerful. Her cousin, while rejoicing in the happy home she had +found, while congratulating her with fraternal interest on the kind +friends her mother's virtues had procured her, imagined not the agony +she was striving to conquer, the devoted love for him which disturbed +the peace around her, which otherwise she might have enjoyed to its full +extent; but she did conquer at length. That complete separation from him +did much towards restoring peace although perhaps love might still have +lingered; for what absence, what distance can change a woman's heart? +Yet it interfered no longer with happiness, and she answered Seymour's +constant and affectionate letters in his own style, as a sister would +have done. + +Sixteen years had passed, and not once had the cousins met. Womanhood in +its maturity was now Lucy's; every girlish feeling had fled, and she +perhaps thought young affections had gone also, but her cheek flushed +and every pulse throbbed, when she opened a long, long expected letter, +and found her cousin was a widower in declining health, which precluded +him from attending to his two motherless girls, imploring her, as her +duties in Mrs. Hamilton's family were nearly over, to leave England and +be the guardian spirit of his home, to comfort his affliction, to soothe +his bodily suffering, and learn to know and love his children, ere they +were fatherless as well as motherless, and deprived of every friend save +the aunt Lucy they had been taught to love, although to them unknown. +The spirit of deep melancholy breathing through this epistle called +forth for a few minutes a burst of tears from her who for so many years +had checked all selfish grief. + +"If I can comfort him, teach his children to love me, and be their +mother now they are orphans, oh, I shall not have lived in vain." Such +were the words that escaped her lips as she ceased to weep, and sat a +few minutes in thought, then sought Mrs. Hamilton and imparted all to +her. Mrs. Hamilton hesitated not a moment in her decision. Her own +regret at parting with her friend interfered not an instant with the +measure she believed would so greatly tend to the happiness of Miss +Harcourt. Mr. Hamilton seconded her; but the sorrow at separation, which +was very visible in the midst of their exertions for her welfare, both +gratified and affected Lucy. Never had she imagined how dear she was to +her pupils till the time of separation came; and when she quitted +England, it was with a heart swelling with interest and affection for +those she had left, and the fervent prayer that they might meet again. + +Mr. Seymour had said, were it not for his declining health, which +forbade the exertion of travelling, he would have come for her himself; +but if she would only consent to his proposal, if she could resign such +kind friends to devote herself to an irritable and ailing man, he would +send one under whose escort she might safely travel. Miss Harcourt +declined that offer, for Mr. Hamilton and Percy had both declared their +intention of accompanying her as far as Paris, and thence to Geneva, +where Mr. Seymour resided. + +It was long ere Mr. Hamilton's family became reconciled to this change; +Oakwood appeared so strange without the kind, the gentle Miss Harcourt, +whose steady yet mild firmness had so ably assisted Mrs. Hamilton in the +rearing of her now blooming and virtuous family. It required some +exertion, not only in Emmeline but in Ellen, to pursue their studies +with any perseverance, now that the dear friend who had directed and +encouraged them had departed. Ellen's grateful affection had the last +few years been returned with equal warmth; that prejudice which had at +first characterised Miss Harcourt's feelings towards her had entirely +vanished during her sufferings, and a few days before her departure, +Lucy with much feeling had admitted the uncalled for harshness with +which she too had treated her in her months of misery, and playfully yet +earnestly asked her forgiveness. They were alone, and Ellen's only +answer had been to throw herself on her friend's neck and weep. + +Before Christmas came, however, these painful feelings had been +conquered. Pleasing letters from Miss Harcourt arrived by almost every +post for one or other of the inmates of Oakwood, and their contents +breathing her own happiness, and the warmest, most affectionate interest +in the dear ones she had left, satisfied even Emmeline, from whom a +fortnight's visit from the Earl and Countess of Elmore had banished all +remaining trace of sadness. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton had welcomed but very +few resident visitors to Oakwood during the early years of their +children, but now it was with pleasure they exercised the hospitality so +naturally their own, and received in their own domains the visits of +their most intimate friends of London; but these visits afford us no +matter of entertainment, nor enter much into the purpose of this +history. A large party was never collected within the walls of Oakwood; +the intimate friends of Mr. Hamilton were but few, for it was only those +who thought on the essentials of life as himself with whom he mingled in +the familiar position of host. The Marquis of Malvern's family alone +remained to spend Christmas with them, and added much to the enjoyment +of that domestic circle. Their feelings and pursuits were in common, for +the Marchioness of Malvern was a mother after Mrs. Hamilton's own stamp, +and her children had benefited by similar principles; the same +confidence existed between them. The Marchioness had contrived to win +both the reverence and affection of her large family, though +circumstances had prevented her devoting as much of her own time and +care on their education as had Mrs. Hamilton. Her eldest daughter was +married; her second, some few years older than Caroline, was then +staying with her, and only one of the three who accompanied her to +Oakwood was as yet introduced. Lady Florence was to make her _début_ the +following season, with Emmeline Hamilton; and Lady Emily was still, when +at home, under the superintendence of a governess and masters. Lord +Louis, the Marchioness's youngest child, a fine lad of sixteen, with his +tutor, by Mr. Hamilton's earnest desire, also joined their happy party, +and by his light-hearted humour and fun, added not a little to the +amusements of the evening. But it was Lady Gertrude, the eldest of the +three sisters then at Oakwood, that Mrs. Hamilton earnestly hoped might +take the place Annie Grahame had once occupied in Caroline's affections. +Hers was a character much resembling her brother's St. Eval, to whom her +features also bore a striking resemblance. She might, at a first +introduction, have been pronounced proud, but, as is often the case, +reserve was mistaken for pride. Yet in her domestic circle she was ever +the gayest, and the first to contribute to general amusement. In +childhood she had stood in a degree alone, for her elder sisters were +four or five years older than herself, and Florence and Emily four and +five years younger. She had learned from the first to seek no sympathy, +and her strong feeling might perhaps by being constantly smothered, at +length have perished within her, and left her the cold unloving +character she appeared to the world, had it not been for the devoted +affection of her brother Eugene, in whom she soon learned to confide +every emotion as it rose, at that age when girls first become sensible +that they are thinking and feeling beings. They quickly became sensible +that in almost every point they were kindred souls, and the name of +Eugene and Gertrude were ever heard together in their family. Their +affection was at length a proverb among their brothers and sisters, and +perhaps it was this great similarity of disposition and the regard felt +for her noble brother, that first endeared Gertrude to Mrs. Hamilton, +whose wishes with regard to her and Caroline promised fulfilment. Some +chord of sympathy had been struck within them, and they were very soon +attached companions, although at first Lady Gertrude had hesitated, for +she could not forget the tale of scornfully-rejected love imparted to +her by her brother. She had marked the conduct of Caroline from the +beginning. She too had hoped that in her she might have welcomed a +sister, although her observant eye had marked some defects in her +character which the ardent St. Eval had not perceived. Coolness during +the past season had subsisted between them, for Caroline had taken no +trouble to conquer Lady Gertrude's reserve, and the latter was too proud +to make advances. In vain Lord St. Eval had wished a better +understanding should exist between them, while Caroline was under the +influence of Miss Grahame, it was impossible for her to associate in +sympathy with Lady Gertrude Lyle; yet now that they mingled in the +intimacy of home, now the true character of Caroline was apparent, that +Lady Gertrude had time and opportunity to remark her devotion to her +parents, more particularly to her mother, her affectionate kindness to +her brothers and Emmeline and Ellen, her very many sterling virtues, +which had previously been concealed, but which were discovered by the +tributes of grateful affection constantly offered to her by the +inhabitants of the village, by the testimony of Mr. Howard, the +self-conquests of temper and inclination for the sake of others, which +the penetrating eye of Lady Gertrude discovered, and, above all, the +spirit of piety and meekness which now characterised her actions, all +bade the sister of St. Eval reproach herself for condemning without +sufficient evidence. For her conduct to her brother there was indeed no +excuse, and on that subject alone, with regard to Caroline, Lady +Gertrude felt bewildered, and utterly unable to comprehend her. It was a +subject on which neither chose to speak, for it was a point of delicacy +to both. Had Lady Gertrude been excluded from her brother's confidence, +she too might have spoken as carelessly and admiringly of him as his +sisters constantly did; but she could not so address the girl who had +rejected him, it would be pleading his cause, from which she revolted +with a repugnance natural to her high-minded character. + +"If he still love her, as his letters would betray, let him come and +plead his own cause; never will I say anything that can make Caroline +believe I am in secret negotiating for him." Such was the thought that +ever checked her, when about to speak of him in the common course of +conversation, and baffled all Caroline's secret wishes that she would +speak in his praise as her sisters and Lord Louis so constantly did. + +But even as delicacy prevented all allusion to him from the lips of Lady +Gertrude, so it actuated Caroline with perhaps even greater force. Would +she betray herself, and confess that she repented her rejection of St. +Eval? would she by word or deed betray that, would he return to her, she +would be his own, and feel blessed in his affections? She shrunk almost +in horror from doing so, and roused her every energy to conceal and +subdue every emotion, till she could hear his name with composure. Yet +more than once had Lady Gertrude, as she silently watched her +countenance, fancied she perceived sufficient evidence to bid her wonder +what could have induced Caroline's past conduct, to imagine that if St. +Eval could forget that, he might be happy yet; and for his sake, +conquering her scruples, once she spoke openly of him, when she and +Caroline were visiting some poor cottagers alone. She spoke of his +character, many points of which, though she admired, she regretted, as +rendering him less susceptible of happiness than many who were less +gifted. "Unless he find a wife to love him as he loves--one who will +devote herself to him alone, regardless of rank or fortune, Eugene never +can be happy; and if he pass through life, unblest by the dearest and +nearest ties, he will be miserable." So much she did say, and added her +earnest wishes for his welfare, in a tone that caused the tears to +spring to the eyes of her companion, who permitted her to speak for some +time without in any way replying. + +"What a pity you are his sister," she replied, rallying all her energies +to speak frankly and somewhat sportively; "a woman like yourself is +alone worthy of Lord St. Eval." + +"You are wrong," replied Lady Gertrude, sadly; "I am much too cold and +reserved to form, as a wife, the happiness of such a character as my +brother's. We have grown together from childhood, we have associated +more intimately and affectionately with each other than with any other +members of our family, and therefore Eugene knows and loves me. The wife +of St. Eval should be of a disposition as ingenuous and open as his is +reserved; her affection, her sympathy, must make his felicity. He is +grave--too grave; she should be playful, but not childish. Even if she +have some faults, with the love for which my brother pines, the +ingenuousness unsullied by the most trifling artifice, her very faults +would bind her more closely to him." + +Caroline was silent, and Lady Gertrude soon after changed the subject. +Had she heard no reports of Caroline's preference of Lord Alphingham, of +the affair which had somewhat hurried Mr. Hamilton's departure from +London, that conversation would have confirmed her suspicions, that her +brother was no subject of indifference to Caroline. She longed for her +to be candid with her, to hear the whole truth from her own lips. The +happiness of the young Earl was so dear to her, that she would have done +much, very much to secure it; yet so far she could not force herself to +go, particularly as he had given her no charge to do so. She little knew +that Caroline would have given worlds, had they been at her disposal, to +have confided all to her: her repentance, her folly, her earnest prayers +for amendment, to become at length worthy of St. Eval. Caroline loved, +truly loved, because she esteemed, Lady Gertrude; her friendship for her +differed as much from that she believed she had felt for Annie Grahame, +as her regard for St. Eval was unlike that which Lord Alphingham had +originated. Once, the superiority of Lady Gertrude's character would +have rendered her an object of almost dislike to Caroline, as possessing +virtues she admired but would not imitate. Now those virtues were +appreciated, her own inferiority was felt more painfully; and while +associating with her, the recollections of the past returned more than +ever, embittered by remorse. Sir George Wilmot and Lilla Grahame were +also guests at Oakwood. The former declared he had seldom anchored in +moorings so congenial to his taste. In Lilla the effects of happiness +and judicious treatment were already distinctly visible. The young men +spent the Christmas recess at home, and added much to the hilarity of +their domestic circle; nor must we forget Arthur Myrvin, who spent as +much of his time at Oakwood, as his duties permitted; the friendship of +Herbert Hamilton doing much to remove the bitter feelings which often +still possessed him. He would at first have shunned the invitation, but +vainly he strove to do so; for there was one fair object there who held +him with an iron chain, which excited while bound him. He could not +break it asunder, though peace he felt was flying from his grasp. + + + + +CHAPTER X. + + +"Gertrude's letters this morning have brought her some extraordinarily +agreeable tidings," exclaimed Lady Florence Lyle, gaily, as her sister +entered the breakfast-room, rather later than usual. + +"On my honour, her countenance is rather a clearer index than usual +to-day," observed the Marquis, laughing. "Well, Gertrude, what is it?" + +"News from Eugene," exclaimed Lady Emily and Lord Louis in a breath; "he +is going to be married. Either Miss Manvers or Miss Greville have +consented to take him for better or worse," added Lord Louis, laughing. +"Gertrude, allow me to congratulate you on the gift of a new sister, +who, as the wife of my right honourable brother the Earl of St. Eval, +will be dearer to you than any other bearing the same relationship." + +"Reserve your congratulations, Louis, till they are needed," replied +Lady Gertrude, fixing her eyes steadily on Caroline's face, which was +rapidly changing from pale to crimson. + +"I have no such exciting news to communicate," she added, very quietly. +"Eugene is in England, and alone." + +"In England!" repeated Percy, starting up; "I am delighted to hear it. +I just know enough of him to wish most ardently to know more. Will he +not join us? He surely will not winter at Castle Malvern alone, like a +hermit, surrounded by snows; if he do, he is a bachelor confirmed: not a +hope for his restoration to the congenial warmth of life." + +"He has no such intention," replied Lady Gertrude, smiling; "our present +happy circle has too many attractions to permit his resting quietly in +solitude, and, with Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton's kind permission, will join +us here by Christmas Eve." + +"There are few whom we shall be so pleased to welcome as my noble young +friend St. Eval," answered Mr. Hamilton, instantly; "few whose society I +so much prize, both for myself and my sons." + +"And the minstrel's harp shall sleep no more, but wake her boldest +chords to welcome such a guest to Oakwood's aged walls," exclaimed +Emmeline, gaily. + +"Thus I give you leave to welcome him, but if he take my place with you +in our evening walks, I shall wish him back again at Monte Rosa in a +twinkling," observed Lord Louis, in the same gay tone, and looking +archly at his fair companion; "when Eugene appears my reign is always +over." + +"Louis, I shall put you under the command of Sir George Wilmot," said +his father, laughing, however, with the rest of the circle. + +"Ay, ay, do; the sea is just the berth for such youngsters as these," +remarked the old Admiral, clapping his hand kindly on the lad's +shoulder. + +While such _badinage_ was passing, serious thoughts were occupying the +minds of more than one individual of that circle. It would be difficult +to define the feelings of Caroline as she heard that St. Eval was in +England, and coming to Oakwood. Had he so soon conquered his affections, +that he could associate with lier on terms of friendly intimacy? She +longed to confess to her mother her many conflicting feelings; she felt +that her earnest prayers were her own, but shame prevented all +disclosure. She could not admit she now loved that very man whom she had +once treated with such contempt and scorn, rejected with proud +indifference. Even her mother, her fond mother, would say her present +feelings were a just punishment for the past; and that she could not +bear. Inwardly she resolved that not a word should pass her lips; she +would suffer unshrinkingly, and in silence. + +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, and the Marquis and Marchioness of Malvern also +became engrossed with the same subject; the latter had seen and highly +approved of their son's attentions to Caroline, and appeared gratified +by the manner in which she accepted them. Disappointment and indignation +for a time succeeded the young Earl's departure for the Continent, but +the friendship so long subsisting between the families prevented all +unpleasant feeling, except, perhaps, a little towards Caroline herself. +They gladly welcomed the intelligence that St. Eval was in England, and +wished to join them at Oakwood, for they hailed it as a sign that his +fancy had been but fleeting, and was now entirely conquered. Mr. and +Mrs. Hamilton thought the same, though to them it was far more a matter +of disappointment than rejoicing; but hope mingled almost unconsciously +with regret, and they too were pleased that he was about to become their +guest. + +Lady Gertrude's eyes were more than once during that morning fixed on +Caroline, as the subject of St. Eval's travels and residence abroad were +discussed, but she was silent; whatever were her secret reflections, +they were confined within the recesses of her own heart. + +Lord St. Eval came, and with him fresh enjoyment for Percy and Herbert; +and even for young Myrvin, who found nothing in the society of the young +nobleman to wound his pride by recalling to his mind his own inferior +rank. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton fancied they had read his character before; +but their previous intimacy had not discovered those many pleasing +qualifications which domestic amusements and occupations betrayed. Much +of his reserve was now banished; his manners were as easy and as free +from pride or hauteur as his conversation, though chaste and +intellectual, was from pedantry. To all the individuals of that happy +circle he was the same; as kind and as gay to Emmeline and Ellen as to +his own sisters; there might, perhaps, have been a degree of reserve in +his demeanour towards Caroline, but that, except to those principally +concerned, might not have been remarked, for his intercourse with her +was even more general than with others. Emmeline and Ellen, or even +Lilla, was often his selected companion for a walk, but such an +invitation never extended to Caroline, and yet he could never be said +either to neglect or shun her; and she shrinking from attracting his +notice as much as she had once before courted it, an impassable yet +invisible barrier seemed to exist between them. In St. Eval's manner, +his mother and Lady Gertrude read that his feelings were not conquered; +that he was struggling to subdue them, and putting their subjection to +the proof; but Caroline and her parents imagined, and with bitter pain, +that much as he had once esteemed and loved her, a feeling of +indifference now possessed him. + +Herbert found pleasure in the society of the young Earl, for St. Eval +had penetrated the secret of his and Mary's love; though with innate +delicacy he refrained from noticing it farther than constantly to make +Mary his theme during his walks with Herbert, and speaking of her +continually to the family, warming the heart of Emmeline yet more in his +favour, by his sincere admiration of her friend. He gave an excellent +account of her health, which she had desired him to assure her friends +the air of Italy had quite restored. He spoke in warm admiration of her +enthusiasm, her love of nature, of all which called forth the more +exalting feelings; of her unaffected goodness, which had rendered her a +favourite, spite of her being a foreigner and a Protestant, throughout +the whole hamlet of Monte Rosa, and as he thus spoke, the anxious eye of +Mrs. Hamilton ever rested on her Herbert, who could read in that glance +how true and fond was the sympathy, which not once since he had confided +in her his happiness, had he regretted that he had sought. + +The remaining period of the Marquis of Malvern's sojourn at Oakwood +passed rapidly away without any event of sufficient importance to find a +place in these pages. They left Oakwood at the latter end of January for +St. Eval's beautiful estate in Cornwall, where they intended to remain a +month ere they went to London, about the same time as Mr. Hamilton's +family. That month was a quiet one at Oakwood; all their guests had +departed, and, except occasional visits from Arthur Myrvin and St. +Eval, their solitude was uninterrupted. + +St. Eval's estate was situated a few miles inland from the banks of the +Tamar, one of the most beautiful spots bordering that most beautiful +river. He was wont leisurely to sail down the stream to Plymouth, and +thence to Oakwood, declaring the distance was a mere trifle; but +nevertheless it was sufficiently long for Mr. Hamilton sometimes to +marvel at the taste of his noble friend, which led him often twice and +regularly once a week to spend a few hours, never more, at Oakwood, when +he knew they should so soon meet in London. St. Eval did not solve the +mystery, but continued his visits, bringing cheerfulness and pleasure +whenever he appeared, and bidding hope glow unconsciously in each +parent's heart, though had they looked for its foundation, they would +have found nothing in the young Earl's manner to justify its +encouragement. + +In March Mr. Hamilton's family once more sought their residence in +Berkeley Square, about a week after the Marquis of Malvern's arrival; +and this season, the feelings of the sisters, relative to the gaieties +in which they were now both to mingle, were more equal. The bright hues +with which Caroline had before regarded them had faded--too soon and too +painfully, indeed. + +She had been deceived, and in that word, when applied to a young, +aspiring, trusting mind, what anguish does it not comprise. True, she +deserved her chastisement, not only that she had acted the part of a +deceiver to one who trusted her far more than she had done Lord +Alphingham, but wilfully she had blinded herself to her own feelings, +that she might prove her independence; yet these facts lessened not the +bitterness of feeling which was now often hers. But she did not +relinquish society; the dread of encountering Lord Alphingham was not +strong enough to overcome her secret wish that, by her conduct in +society, she might prove to St. Eval that, although unworthy to be +selected as his wife, she would yet endeavour to regain his esteem. She +had resolved to think less of herself and more of others, and thus +become more amiable in their sight, and not feel so many mortifications, +as by her constant desire for universal homage, she had previously +endured. She knew the task was difficult so to conquer herself, and +doubting her own strength, was led to seek it where alone it could be +found. To none did she confess these secret feelings and determination; +calmly and steadily she looked forward, and so successfully had she +schooled herself to submission, that no word or sign as yet betrayed to +her parents the real state of her affections. + +Emmeline's dislike to London had abated as much as had her sister's +glowing anticipations. They were now only to be four months in the +metropolis; the strict routine of masters, etc., was at an end, and she +was to accompany Mrs. Hamilton whenever she went out. She left Oakwood +with regret, and the society and conversation of Arthur Myrvin were +missed more often in London than she chose to confess, but enjoyment was +ever found for Emmeline--life was still a romance to her. In the society +of London, as in the cottages of Oakwood, she was beloved, and she was +happy; but those of the opposite sex, much as they thronged around her, +had no more thought of demanding such a being in marriage, than she had +of what is termed making conquests. It was therefore with feelings of +much less anxiety Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton mingled in society this season, +for the conduct of both their daughters was such as to afford them +satisfaction. + +Some changes had taken place in many of the personages with whom we are +acquainted, since the last time we beheld them. Short and evanescent is +fashionable popularity. Lord Alphingham's reign might be, in a degree, +considered over. Some rumours had been floating over the town at that +time of the year when, in all probability, he thought himself most +secure, that is, when London society is dispersed; rumours which had the +effect of excluding him from most of those circles in which Mr. +Hamilton's family mingled, and withdrawing from him in a great measure +the friendship of Montrose Grahame, who, the soul of honour himself, +shrunk from any connection with one whose reputation the faintest breath +had stained. Yet still there were many who regarded these rumours as the +mere whisperings of envy, and with them he was as much a favourite as +ever. Amongst these was Annie Grahame, whose marked preference more than +atoned to the Viscount for her father's coldness. In vain Grahame +commanded that his daughter should change her manner towards him. She, +who had prevailed on a daughter to disobey this very mandate from the +lips of an indulgent parent, was not likely to regard that of the father +whose sternness and often uncalled-for severity had completely alienated +her affections, and Lord Alphingham had now another urgent reason to +flatter Annie's vanity and make her his own. + +A distant relation and godmother of Lady Helen Grahame had, most +unexpectedly, left her at her death sole heiress to a handsome fortune, +which was to descend undivided to her elder daughter, and thus to +Annie's other attractions was now added that all-omnipotent charm, the +knowledge that she was an heiress, not perhaps to any very large +property, but quite sufficient to most agreeably enlarge the fortune of +any gentleman who would venture to take her for better or worse. One +would have supposed that now every wish of this aspiring young lady was +gratified; but no. It mattered not, though crowds were at her feet, that +when they met, which was very seldom, even Caroline was no longer her +rival, all the affection she possessed was lavished without scruple on +Lord Alphingham, and every thought was turned, every effort directed +towards the accomplishment of that one design. So deeply engrossed was +she in this resolution, that she had no time nor thought to annoy +Caroline, as she had intended, except in exercising to its full extent +her power over Lord Alphingham whenever she was present, in which the +Viscount's own irritated feelings towards her ably assisted. Caroline +felt the truth of her mother's words, that Lord Alphingham, indeed, had +never honourably loved her; that Annie's conduct justified Mrs. +Hamilton's prejudice, and as her heart shrunk in sadness from the +retrospection of these, truths, it swelled in yet warmer affection, not +only towards her fond and watchful mother, but towards the friends that +mother's judicious choice selected and approved. + +Cecil Grahame had been continually in the habit of drawing upon his +mother's cash for the indulgence of his extravagant pleasures, and Lady +Helen had thoughtlessly satisfied all his wishes, without being in the +least aware of the evil propensities she was thus encouraging. It was +not till Cecil was about to leave Eton for the University, that she was +at all startled at the amount of his debts, and then her principal alarm +arose more from the dread of her husband's anger towards her son, if he +discovered the fact, than from any maternal anxiety for Cecil's unsteady +principles. Her only wish was to pay off these numerous debts, without +disclosing them to the husband she so weakly dreaded. How could she +obtain so large a sum, even from her own banker, and thus apply it, +without his knowledge and assistance? The very anticipation of so much +trouble terrified her almost into a fit of illness; and rather than +exert her energies or expose her son to his father's wrath, she would +descend to deceit, and implore his assistance in obtaining the whole +amount, on pretence that she required it for the payment of her own +expenses and debts of honour. She imagined that she had sunk too low in +her husband's esteem to sink much lower; and therefore, if her requiring +money to discharge debts of honour exposed her yet more to his contempt, +it was not of much consequence; besides if it were, she could not help +it, a phrase with which Lady Helen ever contrived to silence the rebukes +of conscience when they troubled her, which, however, was not often. + +She acted accordingly; but as she met the glance of her husband, a +glance in which sadness triumphed over severity, she was tempted to +throw herself at his feet, and beseech him not to imagine her the +dissipated woman her words betrayed, for Lady Helen loved her husband as +much as such a nature could love; but, of all things, she hated a scene, +and though every limb trembled with emotion, she permitted him to leave +her, stung almost to madness by the disclosure her request implied. Did +she play? was that fatal propensity added to her numerous other errors? +and yet never had anything fallen under his eye to prove that she did. +And what debts had she contracted to demand such a sum? Grahame felt she +had deceived him; that the money had never been expended on herself; but +he would not torture himself by demanding a true and full disclosure. +The conduct of his children had ever grieved him, and fearing too justly +the request of his wife related to them, madly and despairingly he +closed his eyes and his lips, thus probably encouraging an evil which he +might have prevented. He delivered the stated sum, and that same day +made over to his wife's own unchecked disposal the whole of that fortune +which, when first inherited, she had voluntarily placed in his hands as +trustee for herself and for her daughter, to whom it would descend. +Briefly he resigned the office she had entreated him to take, sternly +observing, that Annie had better moderate her expectations, as, did Lady +Helen frequently incur such heavy debts, not much was likely to descend +to her daughter. It was a great deal too much trouble for Lady Helen to +expostulate, and if any feeling predominated to conquer the pang +occasioned by Grahame's determination, it was relief, that she might now +assist Cecil, if he should require it, without applying to his father. + +Montrose Grahame was naturally not only an excellent but a judicious +man; but to a great extent, his judgment had deserted him when he +selected Lady Helen as his wife. Had he been united to a woman in whose +judgment and firmness he could confide, he would have been quite as much +respected and beloved in his family as were Mr. Hamilton and the Marquis +of Malvern in theirs; but now neither respect nor affection was +extended towards him, except, perhaps, by Lilla, and unconsciously by +Lady Helen. Severity constantly indulged, was degenerating into +moroseness; and feelings continually controlled, giving place to +coldness and distrust. It was fortunate for Lilla's happiness and, as it +afterwards proved, for her father's, that she was now under the kindly +care of Mrs. Douglas, for constantly irritated with his elder girl, who, +it must be owned, gave him abundant cause, that irritation and suspicion +would undoubtedly have extended towards his younger, and at once have +destroyed the gentleness and amiability which Mrs. Douglas was so +carefully and tenderly fostering. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton saw this change, +and regretted it; but their influence, powerful as it was, could be of +no avail in counteracting the effect of domestic annoyances, paternal +anxiety, and constantly aroused irritation. Of all the evils in life, +domestic discord is one of the greatest, one under which the heart +bleeds the most; want of sympathy always prevents or banishes affection. +Had Grahame been a careless, selfish man, he might possibly have been +happier; his very sensitiveness was his bane. The silly weaknesses of +his wife might partially have lessened his love for her, but his +children, with all their faults, were dear to their father; they knew +not, guessed not, how much his happiness was centred in theirs; how his +heart was rent with anguish every time that duty, as he imagined, called +on him to be severe. Had he followed the dictates of his nature, he +would rather have ruined his children by over-indulgence than severity; +but the hope of counteracting the effect of their mother's weakness had +guided his mistaken treatment. Could his inmost soul have been read by +those who condemned his harshness, they would have sincerely pitied the +keen and agonized sensitiveness with which he felt the alienation of +their affections. Much as he saw to blame in Annie, had she ever given +him one proof of filial love, all would have been forgiven, and the +blessing of a parent been her own in all she did or wished. Had Cecil +confessed those errors of which he was conscious that he was guilty to +his father, he would have found a true and tender friend, who would have +led his naturally good, though too yielding, character aright, and +misery to both might have been spared, but such was not to be; and in +the fates of Alfred Greville and Cecil Grahame we may chance to perceive +that, whatever may be the difficulties surrounding her, however blighted +may appear the produce of her anxious labours, yet reward will attend +the firm, religious mother, however difficult may be the actual +fulfilment of her duties; while that mother who, surrounded by luxury +and prosperity, believes, by unqualified indulgence, she is firmly +binding her offspring in the observance of love and duty, will reap but +too bitter fruit. + +It was when in the presence of the Duchess of Rothbury Caroline felt +most uncomfortable. The family were as cordial as ever, but there was +somewhat in the cold, penetrating eye of her Grace, that bade her almost +unconsciously shrink from meeting its glance. In the previous season the +Duchess had ever singled Caroline out as an object of her especial +regard, a circumstance so unusual in one of her character, that it +rendered her present haughty coldness more difficult to bear. Caroline +would have borne it in silence had it only extended towards herself, but +it appeared as if both Emmeline and Ellen shared the contempt she +perhaps had justly called forth on herself, as the Duchess, tenacious of +her penetrative powers, feared to honour either of them with her favour, +lest she should be again deceived. Caroline longed to undeceive her on +this point, to give her a just estimate of both her sister and cousin's +character, acknowledge how far superior in filial respect and affection, +as well as in innate integrity and uprightness, they were to herself; +but her mother entreated her to let time do its work, and wait till the +Duchess herself discovered they were not what she either believed they +were or might be, and she checked her wish. + +We will here mention a circumstance which occurred in Mr. Hamilton's +family soon after their arrival in town, which occasioned Mrs. Hamilton +some uneasiness. Ellen's health was now perfectly re-established, and on +Miss Harcourt's unexpected departure, Mrs. Hamilton had determined on +introducing her niece with Emmeline in the present season. If Lucy had +remained in her family, Ellen would not have made her _début_ till the +following year, not that her age was any obstacle, for there were only +eight months difference between her and Emmeline, but her retiring +disposition and delicacy of constitution caused Mrs. Hamilton to think +this plan the most advisable. When, however, there was no longer any +excuse with regard to failing health, and no Miss Harcourt with whom her +evenings at home might be more agreeably spent, Mrs. Hamilton, by the +advice of her husband, changed her intention; and Emmeline even made a +joke with Ellen on the admirable fun they should have together, +rejoicing that such an important event in the lives of each should take +place on the same day. It so happened that Ellen never appeared to enter +into her cousin's everlasting merriment on this subject; still she said +nothing for or against till the day all-important with the ordering +their elegant dresses for the occasion. Timidly and hesitatingly she +then ventured to entreat her aunt still to adhere to her first plan, and +allow her to remain quietly at home, under the care of Ellis, till the +following year. Mrs. Hamilton and her cousins looked at her with +astonishment; but the former smilingly replied she could not indulge her +niece in what appeared an unfounded fancy. The dress she should order, +for she hoped Ellen would change her mind before the day arrived, as, +unless a very good reason were given, she could not grant her request. +Ellen appeared distressed; but the conversation changed, and the subject +was not resumed till the day actually arrived, in the evening of which +she was to accompany her aunt to a ball at the Marchioness of Malvern's, +and two days after they were all engaged at a dinner-party at the Earl +of Elmore's. + +Summoning all her courage, Ellen entered her aunt's boudoir in the +morning, and again made her request with an earnestness that almost +startled Mrs. Hamilton, particularly as it was accompanied by a +depression of manner, which she now did not very often permit to obtain +ascendency. With affectionate persuasiveness she demanded the reason of +this extraordinary resolution, and surprise gave way to some +displeasure, when she found Ellen had really none to give. Her only +entreaty was that she might not be desired to go out till the next year. + +"But why, my dear Ellen? You must have some reason for this intended +seclusion. Last year I fancied you wished much to accompany us, and I +ever regretted your delicate health prevented it. What has made you +change your mind so completely? Have you any distaste for the society in +which I mingle?" + +Falteringly, and almost inaudibly, Ellen answered, "None." + +"Is it a religious motive? Do your principles revolt from the amusements +which are now before you? Tell me candidly, Ellen. You know nothing +displeases me so much as mystery? I can forgive everything else, for +then I know our relative positions, and am satisfied you are not going +far wrong; but when every reason is studiously concealed, I cannot guess +the truth, and I must fancy it is, at least, a mistaken notion blinding +your better judgment. I did not expect a second mystery from you, +Ellen." + +Mrs. Hamilton's expressive voice clearly denoted she was displeased, and +her niece, after two or three ineffectual efforts to prevent it, finally +burst into tears. + +"I do not wish to be harsh with you, or accuse you unjustly," continued +her aunt, softened at the unaffected grief she beheld, "but if your +reason be a good one, why do you so carefully conceal it? You have been +lately so very open with me, and appeared to regard me so truly as your +friend, that your present conduct is to me not only a riddle, but a +painful reflection. Is it because your conscience forbids? Perhaps in +your solitary moments you have fancied that worldly amusements, even in +the moderate way in which we regard them, unfits us for more serious +considerations, and you fear perhaps to confess that such is your +reason, because it will seem a reproach to me. If such really be your +motive, do not fear to confess it, my dear girl; I should be the very +last to urge you to do anything that is against your idea of what is +right. To prove the fallacy of such reasoning, to show you that you may +be truly religions without eccentricity, I certainly should endeavour to +do, but I would not force you to go out with me till my arguments had +convinced you. I fancy, by your blushing cheek, that I have really +guessed the cause of your extraordinary resolution, and sorry as I shall +be if I have, yet any reason, however mistaken, is better than a +continued mystery." + +"Indeed, indeed, I am not so good as you believe me," replied Ellen, +with much emotion. "It is not the religious motive you imagine that +urges me to act contrary to your wishes. Did you know my reason, I am +sure you would not blame me; but do not, pray do not command me to tell +you. I must obey, if you do, and then"-- + +"And then, if I approve of your reason, as you say I shall, what is it +that you fear? Why, if your conscience does not reproach you, do you +still hide it from me?" + +Ellen was painfully silent. Mrs. Hamilton continued, in a tone of marked +displeasure, "I fear I am to find myself again deceived in you, Ellen, +though in what manner as yet I know not. I will not do such extreme +violence to your inclinations as to command you to yield to my wishes. +If you desire so much to remain at home, do so; but I cannot engage to +make any excuse for you. Neither failing health nor being too young, can +I now bring forward; I must answer all inquiries for you with the truth, +that your own wishes, which I could not by persuasion overcome, alone +keep you at, home. My conscience will still be clear from the +reproaches so plentifully showered on me by the world last season, that +I feared to bring forward my orphan niece with my daughters, lest her +charms should rival theirs." + +"Did the ill-natured and ignorant dare to say such a thing of you?" +demanded Ellen, startled at this remark. + +"They knew not the cause of your never appearing in public, and +therefore, as appearances were against me, scrupled not to condemn." + +"And do you heed them? Do these remarks affect you?" exclaimed Ellen, +earnestly. + +"No, Ellen. I have done my duty; I will still do it, undisturbed by such +idle calumnies, even should they now be believed by those whose opinions +I value, who, from your seclusion, may imagine they have good reason. In +my conduct towards you the last two years I have nothing to reproach +myself." + +"The last two years. Oh, never, never, from the first moment I was under +your care, never can your conduct to me have given you cause for +self-reproach, dearest aunt. Oh, do not say that the gratification of my +wishes will give rise to a suspicion so unjust, so unfounded," entreated +Ellen, seizing with impetuosity the hand of her aunt. + +"In all probability it will; but do not speak in this strain now, Ellen, +it accords not well with the mystery of your words," and Mrs. Hamilton +coldly withdrew her hand. There was a moment's silence, for Ellen had +turned away, pained to her heart's core, and soon after she quitted the +room to seek her own, where, throwing herself on a low seat by the side +of her couch, she gave way to an unrestrained and violent flow of tears. +Mrs. Hamilton little knew the internal struggle her niece was enduring, +the cause of her seclusion; that the term of her self-condemned +probation was not fulfilled, that the long, tedious task was not +accomplished; that it was for this purpose she so earnestly desired that +her time might not be occupied by amusement, till her task was done, the +errors of her earlier years atoned. Mrs. Hamilton had seldom felt more +thoroughly displeased and hurt with her niece than at the present +moment. Gentle, and invulnerable as she ever seemed to irritation, open +as the day herself, she had ever endeavoured to frame her children's +characters in the like manner; ingenuousness always obtained +forgiveness, whatever might have been the mistake or fault. Ellen had +always been a subject of anxiety and watchfulness; but the last two +years her reserve had so entirely given place to candour, that +solicitude had much decreased, till recalled by the resolution we have +recorded. Had Ellen alleged any reason whatever, all would have been +well; Mrs. Hamilton would not have thought on the subject so seriously. +A mystery in her conduct had once before been so productive of anguish, +that Mrs. Hamilton could not think with her usual calmness and temper on +the circumstance. + +It was so long before Ellen regained her composure that traces of tears +were visible even when she joined the family at dinner, and were +remarked by her uncle, who jestingly demanded what could occasion signs +of grief at such an important era in her life. Vainly Ellen hoped her +aunt would spare her the pain of answering by even expressing her +displeasure at her resolution, but she waited in vain, and she was +compelled to own that the era of her life, to which her uncle so +playfully referred, was postponed by her own earnest desire till the +next season. + +Mr. Hamilton put down his knife and fork in unfeigned astonishment. +"Why, what is the meaning of this sudden change?" he exclaimed. "You +were not wont to be capricious, Ellen. Will your aunt explain this +marvellous mystery?" + +"I am sorry I cannot," Mrs. Hamilton replied, in a tone that plainly +betrayed to the quick ears of her husband that she was more than usually +disturbed. "I am not in Ellen's confidence; her resolution is as +extraordinary to me as to you, for she has given me no reason." Mr. +Hamilton said no more, but he looked vexed, and Ellen did not feel more +comfortable. He detained her as she was about to leave the room, and +briefly demanded in what manner she intended to employ the many hours, +which now that Miss Harcourt was away she would have to herself. A +crimson flush mounted to Ellen's temples as she spoke, a flush that, +combined with the hesitating tone in which she answered, "to read and +work," might well justify the sternness of tone and manner with which +her uncle replied. + +"Ellen, had you never deceived us, I might trust you, spite of that +flushed cheek and hesitating tone; as it is, your conduct the last two +years urges me to do so, notwithstanding appearances, and all I say is, +beware how you deceive me a second time." + +Ellen's cheek lost its colour, and became for the space of a minute pale +as death, so much so, that Mrs. Hamilton regretted her husband should +have spoken so severely. Rallying her energies, Ellen replied, in a +steady but very low voice-- + +"My conduct, uncle, during my aunt's and your absence from home, has +been and shall ever be open to the inspection of all your household. I +am too well aware that I am undeserving of your confidence, but I appeal +to Ellis, on whose fidelity I know you rely, to prove to you in this +case you suspect me unjustly." The last word was audible, but that was +all, and, deeply pained, Ellen retired to her own room, which she did +not quit, even to see her favourite cousin decked for the ball. Emmeline +sought her, however, and tried by kisses to recall the truant rose, the +banished smile, but Mrs. Hamilton did not come to wish her good night, +and Ellen's heart was heavy. + +Some few days passed, and Mrs. Hamilton accepted three several +invitations without again expressing her wishes, but though the subject +was not resumed, equal perplexity existed in the minds of both aunt and +niece. Ellen did not accuse Mrs. Hamilton of unkindness, but she could +not fail to perceive that she no longer retained her confidence, and +that knowledge painfully distressed the orphan's easily excited +feelings. Another circumstance gave additional pain; her strange and +apparently capricious behaviour had been casually mentioned to Herbert, +and he, aware that his advice was always acceptable to Ellen, ventured +to remonstrate with her, and playfully to reason her out of what he +termed her extraordinary fancy for seclusion. Some indefinable sensation +ever prevented Ellen from speaking or writing to Herbert as she would +have done to any other member of the family, but she answered him, +acknowledging she deserved his hinted reproach, but owning that she +could not change her conduct, even in compliance with his request; +nevertheless, it grieved her much to know that he, whose approbation +she unconsciously but ardently wished to gain, should believe her the +capricious, unaccountable being it was evident he did: still she +persevered. These, and whatever more she might have to endure, were but +petty trials, to which her secretly chastened mind might bend but should +not weakly bow. She knew, if her aunt were conscious of her attention, +much as perhaps she might approve of the motive, she would deem it a +needless sacrifice, and probably prohibit its continuance; or, if she +permitted and encouraged it, the merit of her action would no longer +exist, nor could she indeed, while in the enjoyment of praise, have +finished a task, commenced and carried on purely for the sake of duty, +and as an atonement for the past, by the sacrifice of inclination, make +peace with the gracious God she had offended. Petty trials were welcome +then, for if she met them with a Christian temper, a Christian spirit, +she might hope that, whatever she might endure, she was progressing in +His paths, "whose ways are pleasantness, and whose paths are peace;" +could she but remove the lingering displeasure and distrust of her aunt +and uncle, she would be quite happy. + +It so happened that Emmeline's next engagement was to the Opera, which +was always Ellen's greatest conquest of inclination. She had amused +herself by superintending her cousin's dressing, and a sigh so audibly +escaped, that Emmeline instantly exclaimed-- + +"Ellen, you know you would like to go with us. In the name of all that +is incomprehensible, why do you stay at home?" + +"Because, much as I own I should like to go with you, I like better to +stay at home." + +"You really are the spirit of contradiction, Ellen. What did you sigh +for?" + +"Not for the Opera, Emmeline." + +"Then why?" + +"Because I cannot bear to feel my aunt has lost all her confidence in +me." + +"You are marvellously silly, Ellen; mamma is just the same to you as +usual, I have observed no difference." + +"Dear Emmeline, coldness is not _seen_, it is _felt_, and as you have +been so happy as never to have felt it, you cannot understand what I +mean." + +"Nor do I ever wish to feel it. But do not look so sorrowful, dear +Ellen; mamma's coldness is an awful thing to encounter, I own." + +"If you have never felt it, how can you judge?" said a playful voice +beside them, for Emmeline had been too deeply engrossed in arranging and +disarranging a wreath of roses in her hair, and Ellen too much engaged +in her own thoughts, to notice the entrance of Mrs. Hamilton. + +"Is it possible you are not yet ready, Emmeline? what have you been +about?" + +"Teasing Ellen, mamma; besides Fanny was engaged, and I could not please +myself." + +"Or rather you were disinclined for exertion. I have been watching you +the last few moments, and you have played with that pretty wreath till +it is nearly spoiled." + +"I plead guilty, dear mamma, but let Fanny come, and I will be ready in +a second," answered Emmeline, looking archly and caressingly in her +mother's face. Mrs. Hamilton smiled, and turned as if to speak to her +niece, but Ellen was gone. She was sitting in her own room a few minutes +afterwards, endeavouring to collect her thoughts sufficiently to +understand the book of the new opera which her cousin had lent her, when +she was interrupted by a hand gently placed upon the leaves. + +"So coldness is felt, not seen, is it, my dear Ellen? well, then, let +that kiss banish it for ever," exclaimed Mrs. Hamilton, encircling the +delicate form of her niece with her arm. "I have been more distant and +unkind perhaps than was necessary, but your mysterious resolution +irritated me beyond forbearance, and I have been very unjust and very +cruel, have I not? will you forgive me?" + +Ellen looked up in her face, and, unable to control her feelings, threw +her arms around her and burst into tears. + +"Nay, dearest, do not let me leave you in tears. I am satisfied you have +some good reason for your conduct, though my usual penetration is +entirely at fault. Will you quite content me by looking steadily in my +face, and assuring me that your conscience never reproaches your +conduct. I shall not have one lingering doubt then." + +Ellen smiled through her tears, as she tried to obey, but her lip so +quivered as she answered, that Mrs. Hamilton laughingly added, "That +would never do in a court of justice, my silly little girl, no one would +pronounce you innocent if thus tearfully affirmed; but as you generally +compel me to regret severity, when I do venture to use it, I must be +content to let you follow your own inclinations this year at least. Next +season, I give you no such licences, _nolens volens_, as Percy would +say, I must take you out with me, you shall not hide yourself in +solitude; but I do not fancy your resolution will hold good, even the +remainder of this season," she added, smilingly. + +"Do not, pray do not try to turn me from it, my dear, kind aunt," said +Ellen, earnestly; "I do not deserve this indulgence from you, for I know +how much you dislike concealment, but indeed, indeed, you shall never +regret your kindness. I do not, I will not abuse it, it is only because, +because--" She hesitated. + +"Do not excite my curiosity too painfully, Ellen, in return for my +indulgence," said Mrs. Hamilton, sportively. + +"No, dear aunt, I only wish to finish a task I have set myself, and my +various avocations during the day prevent my having any time, unless I +take it from such amusements," said Ellen, blushing as she spoke; +"indeed, that is my real and only reason." + +Mrs. Hamilton fixed an anxious glance upon her, but though she really +felt satisfied at this avowal, the actual truth never entered her mind. + +"You have quite satisfied me, my dear girl! I will not ask more, and you +may stay at home as often as you please. Your uncle and I have both been +very unjust and very severe upon our little Ellen, but you have quite +disarmed us; so you shall neither feel nor fancy my coldness any more. +There is Emmeline calling as loudly for me as if I were after my time. +Good night, love. God bless you! do not sit up too late, and be as happy +as you can." + +"I am quite happy now," exclaimed Ellen, returning, with delighted +eagerness, Mrs. Hamilton's fond embrace, and she was happy. For a moment +she felt lonely, as the door closed on her aunt's retreating form, but +as she roused herself to seek her work, that feeling fled. When the +nature of her work was sufficiently simple to require but little +thought, Ellen was accustomed to improve herself by committing to memory +many parts of the Bible suited for prayer, confession, or praise, so +that her thoughts might riot wander during those solitary hours in the +paths of folly or of sin, but once centred on serious things, her mind +might thence become strengthened and her judgment ripened. + +These lonely hours did much towards the formation of the orphan's +character. Accustomed thus to commune with her Creator, to gather +strength in the solitude of her chamber, she was enabled, when her trial +came, to meet it with a spirit most acceptable to Him who had ordained +it. + + + + +CHAPTER XI. + + +Lord Malvern's family and Mr. Hamilton's were still in town, though the +younger members of each were longing for the fresh air of the country. + +One afternoon, hot and dusty from rapid riding, the young Earl St. Eval +hastily, and somewhat discomposedly, entered his sister Lady Gertrude's +private room. + +"Thank heaven, you are alone!" was his exclamation, as he entered; but +throwing himself moodily on a couch, he did not seem inclined to say +more. + +"What is the matter, dear Eugene? Something has disturbed you," said +Lady Gertrude, soothingly, and in a tone tending rather to allay his +irritation than express her own desire to know what had happened. + +"Something--yes, Gertrude, enough to bid me forswear England again, and +bury myself in a desert, where a sigh from your sex could never reach me +more." + +"Not even mine, Eugene?" exclaimed his sister, laying down her work, and +seating herself on a stool at his feet, while she looked up in his +excited features with an expression of fondness on her placid +countenance. "Would you indeed forbid my company, if I implored to share +your solitude?" + +"My sister, my own kind sister, would I, could I deprive myself of the +blessing, the comfort your presence ever brings?" replied St. Eval, +earnestly. "No, dearest Gertrude, I could not refuse you, whatever you +might ask." + +"Then tell me now what it is that has disturbed you thus. With what new +fancy are you tormenting yourself?" + +"Nay, this is no fancy, Gertrude. You are, you have been wrong from the +first, and I am too painfully right Caroline does not and never will +love me." + +Lady Gertrude started. + +"Have you been again rejected?" she demanded, a dark flush of indignant +pride suffusing her cheek. + +Lord St. Eval mournfully smiled. + +"You are as summary in your conclusions as you say I am sometimes. No, +Gertrude, I have not; I feel as if I could not undergo the torture I +once experienced in saying those words which I hoped would seal my +happiness." + +"Nay, then, I must say them for you," said Lady Gertrude, smiling. "I +have watched Caroline narrowly, and I feel so confident she loves you, +that I would, without the slightest doubt or fear, consign your +happiness, precious as it is to me, to her disposal." + +"Forbear, Gertrude, for pity!" exclaimed Lord St. Eval, starting up and +pacing the room. "You saw not what I saw last night, nor heard the cold, +malicious words warning me against her; that even when she had accepted, +she was false; or, if she were not false, that she still loved another. +I saw it in her varying cheek, her confused manner; I heard it in her +hurried accents, and this morning has confirmed all--all. Gertrude, I +ever told you, my lot was not happiness; that as the fate of some men is +all bright, so that of others is all gloom, and such is mine." + +"Eugene, how often must I entreat you not to speak thus. Man's happiness +or misery, in a great measure, depends upon himself. You have often said +that when with me, you reason more calmly than when you think alone; +only tell me coherently what has chanced, and all may not be so gloomy +as you believe." + +St. Eval suffered himself to be persuaded, and seating himself beside +his sister, he complied with her request. + +The fact was simply this. He had returned to England, at the entreaty of +his sister, determined to discover if indeed there existed any hope of +his at length obtaining Caroline's affections. Lady Gertrude's letter to +him purposely portrayed the many amiable qualities existing in +Caroline's character, and the general tenour of her words had led him to +resolve that if he could indeed make so favourable an impression on her +heart as to teach her to forget the past, he too would banish pride, and +secure his happiness, and he hoped hers, by a second offer of his hand. +Her conduct, guarded as it was, had unconsciously strengthened his +hopes, and the last few weeks he had relaxed so much in his reserve, as +to excite in the mind of Caroline the hope, almost the certainty, that +he no longer despised her, and created for himself many truly delightful +hours. It so happened that, on the evening to which he referred, +Caroline had gone to a large party, under the protection of the Countess +of Elmore, who at the entreaty of the lady of the house, had obtained +the permission of Mrs. Hamilton to introduce her. The young Earl had +devoted himself to her the greater part of the evening, to the +satisfaction of both, when his pleasure was suddenly and painfully +alloyed by her visible confusion at the unexpected entrance, and still +more unexpected salutation, of Lord Alphingham. Caroline had so seldom +met the Viscount during the season, that she was not yet enabled to +conquer her agitation whenever she beheld him. She ever dreaded his +addressing her; ever felt that somewhat lurked in his insinuating voice, +that would in the end lead to evil; besides which, her abhorrence +towards him whenever Percy's tale flashed across her mind, which it +never failed to do when he appeared, always prevented her retaining her +calmness undisturbed. Lord St. Eval had left England with the impression +that Alphingham was his favoured rival, and his imagination instantly +attributed Caroline's emotion at his entrance into a preference for the +Viscount. His earnest manner suddenly became chilled, his eloquence +checked. Intuitively Caroline penetrated his suspicions; the wish to +prove they were mistaken and unjust increased her confusion, and instead +of lessening, confirmed them. St. Eval said little more to her during +the evening; but he watched her. He saw Lord Alphingham whisperingly +address her. She appeared to become more painfully confused, and St. +Eval could scarcely restrain himself from hurrying from her sight for +ever; but he did restrain himself, only to be more tortured. + +The Viscount now believed the hour of his vengeance was at hand, when, +without the slightest exertion, he might disturb not only St. Eval's +peace, but that of Caroline. + +If St. Eval had but heard the few words he said to her, jealousy would +have been instantly banished, but for that he was not sufficiently near; +he could only mark the earnest and insinuating manner which the Viscount +knew so well how to assume, and notice her confusion, and the shade of +melancholy expressed on her features, which was in fact occasioned by +Lord St. Eval's sudden desertion, and her annoyance at the cause. His +quick imagination attributed all to the effect of Lord Alphingham's +tender words. The Viscount was well known, to him, and near the end of +the evening approached and remained in conversation by his side, spite +of the haughty reserve maintained by the young Earl, which said so +plainly, "your presence is unwelcome," that it would speedily have +dismissed any one less determined; but Lord Alphingham spoke admiringly +and enthusiastically of Caroline. Lord St. Eval listened, as if +fascinated by the very torture he endured. They were quite alone, and +after a few such observations, the Viscount lowered his voice to a +confidential tone, and said, triumphantly-- + +"Will you envy me, St. Eval, if I confess that I, more than any other +man, am privileged to speak in Miss Hamilton's praise, having once had +the honour of being her accepted lover, and had not cruel parents +interfered, might now have claimed that lovely creature as my own? but +still I do not despair, for the affections of a being so superior once +given to me, as they have been, I am convinced they will never be +another's. I am treating you as a friend, St. Eval, you will not betray +me?" + +"You may trust me, sir," replied the young Earl, coldly. "Your +confidence has been given unasked, but you need not fear its betrayal." + +"Thank you, my kind friend;" and the wily villain continued his +deceiving tale, with an eloquence we will not trouble ourselves to +repeat. It is enough to know its effect on St. Eval was to turn him from +the room, his sensitive feelings wrought almost to madness by malignant +bitterness. Lord Alphingham looked after him, and then turned his glance +on Caroline, and an acute physiognomist might easily have read his +inward thoughts--"My vengeance is complete." + +Alphingham had more than once mentioned the name of the Duchess of +Rothbury; but in such a manner, that though it sounded well enough in +his tale, yet when afterwards recalled by the young Earl, he could not +understand in what position she stood towards them. Lord Alphingham knew +well her Grace's character; he wished St. Eval to seek her, for he felt +assured what she would say would confirm his tale, and render the +barrier between him and Caroline more impassable. His plan succeeded +admirably: St. Eval gallopped off to Airslie early the next morning. The +Duchess welcomed him with the greatest cordiality, for he was a +favourite; but the moment he spoke of Caroline her manner changed. She +became as reserved as she had previously been warm; and when the young +Earl frankly asked her if the refusal of her parents had been the only +bar to her union with the Viscount, she referred him to Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton. That she was aware of something to Caroline's disadvantage +appeared very evident, and that she was not the favourite she had been +last year equally so. St. Eval left her more disturbed than ever, and it +was on returning from his long yet hurried ride he had sought his sister +in the mood we have described. + +Lady Gertrude listened with earnest attention. The tale startled her, +but she disliked the very sight of Lord Alphingham; she believed him to +be a bad, designing man. She felt convinced Caroline did love her +brother, much as appearances were against her; and both these feelings +urged her to sift the whole matter carefully, and not permit the +happiness of two individuals to be sacrificed to what might be but the +idle invention or exaggerations of a bad man. Her ready mind instantly +formed its plan, which calmly but earnestly she imparted to her brother, +and implored his consent to act upon it. Startled and disturbed, St. +Eval at first peremptorily refused; but his sisters's eloquence at +length succeeded. + +Early in the morning of the succeeding day Caroline Hamilton received +the following brief note: + +"Will you, my dear Caroline, receive me half an hour this afternoon? I +have something important to say; I have vanity enough to believe as it +concerns me it will interest you. We shall be more alone at your house +than mine, or I might ask you to come to me. + +"Yours affectionately, + +"GERTRUDE LYLE." + +Completely at a loss to understand the meaning of this little note, +Caroline merely wrote a line to say she should be quite at Lady +Gertrude's service at the appointed time; and so deeply was she +engrossed in the sad tenour of her own thoughts, that all curiosity as +to this important communication was dismissed. + +Three o'clock came and so did Lady Gertrude, whose first exclamation was +to notice Caroline's unusual paleness. + +"Do not heed my looks, dear Gertrude, I am perfectly well; and now that +you are before me, overwhelmed with curiosity as to your intelligence," +said Caroline, whose heavy eyes belied her assurance that she was quite +well. + +"Dearest Caroline," said Lady Gertrude, in a tone of feeling, "I am so +interested in your welfare, that I cannot bear to see the change so +evident in you; something has disturbed you. Show me you consider me +your friend, and tell me what it is." + +"Not to you, oh, not to you; I cannot, I dare not!" burst involuntarily +from the lips of the poor girl, in a tone of such deep distress, that +Lady Gertrude felt pained. "Gertrude, do not ask me; I own I am unhappy, +very, very unhappy, but I deserve to be so. Oh, I would give worlds that +I might speak it, and to you; but I cannot--will not! But do not refuse +me the confidence you offered," she added, again endeavouring to smile, +"I can sympathise in your happiness, though I refuse yours in my +sadness." + +"I am not quite sure whether I have sorrow or joy to impart," said Lady +Gertrude, still feelingly; for she guessed why Caroline believed she +dare not confide in her, and she hailed it as proof that she was right +in her surmise, that her brother's honourable love would not be again +rejected. + +"Eugene seems bent on again quitting England, and I fear if he do, he +will not return home again. On one little circumstance depends his final +determination; my persuasions to the contrary have entirely failed." + +The cheek of her companion blanched even paler than before, two or three +large tears gathered in her eyes, then slowly fell, one by one, upon her +tightly-clasped hands. + +"And if you have failed, who will succeed?" she asked, with a strong +effort. + +"The chosen one, whose power over the heart of St. Eval is even greater +than mine," said Lady Gertrude, steadily. "Ah, Caroline, when a man has +learned to love, the affection of a sister is of little weight." + +"He does love, then," thought Caroline, and her heart swelled even to +bursting, and he goes to seek her. "And will not the being Lord St. Eval +has honoured with his love second your efforts? if she be in England, +can she wish him to quit it?" she said aloud, in answer to her friend. + +"If she love him, she will not," said Lady Gertrude; "but St. Eval fears +to ask the question that decides his fate. Strange and wayward as he is, +he would rather create certain misery for himself, than undergo the +torture of being _again refused_." + +For a few minutes Caroline answered not; then, with a sudden effort, +rallying her energies, she exclaimed, as if in jest-- + +"Why, then, does he not make you his messenger; the affection you bear +for him would endow you with an eloquence, I doubt much whether his own +would surpass." + +She would have spoken more in the same strain, but the effort failed; +and turning away from Lady Gertrude's penetrating glance, which she felt +was fixed upon her, though she could not meet it, she burst into tears. + +More than ever convinced of the truth of her suspicions, Lady Gertrude's +noble mind found it impossible to continue this mode of discovery any +longer. She saw that Caroline imagined not she was the being alluded to; +that not even the phrase "again refused" had startled her into +consciousness, and she felt it was unkind to distress her more. + +"I knew it was false," she exclaimed, as the Viscount's tale flashed +across her mind; then, checking herself, she took Caroline's cold and +half-reluctant hand, and added, in a voice of extreme feeling, +"Caroline, dearest Caroline, forgive my having penetrated your secret; +fear me not, dear girl, I honour too much the feeling which dictates +your conduct. You have learned to love St. Eval; you have repented the +wilful and capricious treatment he once received from you. Deny it not, +nay, do not shrink from me, and think, because I appear so calm, I +cannot feel for those who are dear to me, and even sympathise in their +love. I do not, I will not condemn the past; I did once, I own, but +since I have known you, I have forgiven the mistaken wilfulness of a +misguided girl. You love him--confess that I am right, dearest." + +Caroline's face was concealed within her hand, and almost agonized was +its expression as she looked up. + +"Gertrude," she said, in a low, suffocated voice, "is it well, is it +kind in you thus to speak, to lead me to avow a love for one who, your +own words inform me, will soon be the husband of another?" + +"I said not of another, my dear girl; forgive me this stratagem to +penetrate your well-preserved secret. My brother's happiness is so dear +to me, I could not trust it to one of whose affection I was not certain. +I am not aware I said he would soon be the husband of another; since, if +he be again refused, that he never will be. Simply, then, for I have +been quite tormenting enough, Eugene has striven long with himself to +conquer his love, to be happy as your friend; associating with you as he +does with Emmeline, but he cannot. He still loves you, Caroline, as +devotedly, as faithfully--perhaps more so than when he first offered you +his hand; he dares not renew that offer himself, for he feels a second +refusal from your lips would wound him too deeply. Your voice may chain +him to England, an altered and a happier man, or send him from its +shores a misanthrope and wretched: it is for you to decide, Caroline, +dearest. Must I plead with that eloquence, which you said would surpass +even his own, or will the pleadings of your own kind heart suffice?" + +She paused, in evident emotion, for with a faint cry Caroline had thrown +herself on her neck, and buried her cheek upon her shoulder. Every limb +trembled with agitation; the ecstatic delight of that one moment--doubt +was, indeed, at an end. He loved her, and in spite of her faults he +would cherish her with tenderness; he had chosen her as his wife--chosen +her, though she had rejected, injured him, in preference to the very +many she felt so much more worthy than herself; but unalloyed happiness +was hers only for a few fleeting minutes, he knew not the extent of her +imprudence--how strangely and deeply she had been fascinated by the arts +of Lord Alphingham. Could he love, respect her as the partner of his +life, did he know that? and for a moment painfully did she long to +conceal it from him, to prevent his ever knowing it; but no, her innate +nobility and ingenuousness of character would not be thus trampled on. +She wept, and Lady Gertrude was startled, for those bitter tears were +not the signs of joy. + +"Do not condemn my weakness, dearest Gertrude," she said at length, +struggling for composure. "You do not know why I weep; you cannot guess +the cause of tears at such a moment. Yes, you are right; I do love your +brother with an affection equal to his own, but I thought it would never +pass my lips; for wilfully, blindly I had rejected the affection of his +good and noble heart; I had intentionally caused him pain, banished him +from his country and his friends, and my punishment was just. I thought +he would forget one so utterly unworthy, and the thought was agony. But, +oh, Gertrude, I shall never regain his love: when he knows all, he will +cease to trust me; his esteem I have lost for ever! Gertrude, bear with +me; you cannot know the wretchedness it is to feel he knows not all my +folly. The girl who could wilfully cast aside duty and obedience to a +parent, listen to forbidden vows, weakly place her honour in the power +of one against whom she had been warned--oh, Gertrude, Gertrude, when +St. Eval learns this tale, he will spurn me from his heart! and yet I +will not deceive him, he shall know all, and be free to act as he +will--his proposals shall be no tie." + +The flush of firm yet painful resolution dyed her cheek as she spoke, +and checked her tears. Alarmed as she was by the incoherence yet +connection of her words when attached to Lord Alphingham's hints, which +still lingered on her mind, yet the high-minded Lady Gertrude felt as if +Caroline's honourable determination had struck a new chord of sympathy +within her heart. Integrity itself was hers, and truth in others was +ever to her their most attractive quality. + +"St. Eval's doubts and fears have been already painfully aroused," she +said, gently; "an open explanation from you is more likely to make him +happy than produce the effect you so much, though so naturally, dread: +fear not to impart it. In the relation you now stand to each other, the +avowal of past errors will increase rather than lessen affection, by the +integrity it will display; but leave it till years have passed, and if, +instead of being known now, it is then discovered, then, indeed, might +you fear, with some show of justice, the loss of his esteem. Such will +not be now; but tell him yourself, dear Caroline, the truth or falsehood +of the scandalous tale he heard a night or two ago." + +"What did he hear? if you know, for pity's sake, do not conceal it from +me, dearest Gertrude!" entreated Caroline, almost gasping for breath; +and Lady Gertrude, without hesitation or abbreviation, related the whole +tale her brother had imparted to her, dwelling on the suffering he +endured, as he fancied Caroline's conduct confirmed the words he heard. + +"Then is it, indeed, time for me to speak, though my tale be one of +shame," she exclaimed, as Lady Gertrude paused, and indignation restored +her usual energy. "Never were attentions so revolting to me as were +those of Lord Alphingham that night. He knew he had no right to address +me, and therefore did he ever refrain when mamma was present. Gertrude, +solemnly, sacredly, I protest he has no hold on my affections--he dare +not say he has--nor ever again venture to demand my hand; it has been +irrevocably refused. Not only would my own will prevent my ever becoming +his, but I have--" she paused a moment, for Percy's fatal secret was on +the point of escaping from her lips, but checking herself, she added, "I +am not at liberty to say why, but an inseparable barrier is placed +between us. Listen to me, Gertrude, you will condemn me, be it so; but I +implore, I beseech you to believe me true." Then, without further +hesitation, Caroline briefly yet circumstantially related all those +events in her life with which our readers are so well acquainted. She +did not suppress one point, or endeavour in the least to excuse herself, +and Lady Gertrude, as she listened to that unvarnished tale of youthful +error, felt her heart glow more warmly towards her companion, and her +eye glisten in sympathy for the pain she felt Caroline was inflicting on +herself. Lady Gertrude could feel for others; twice had her carriage +been announced, but she heeded not the summons; a third came just as +Caroline had ceased to speak, and silently she rose to depart. She met +the imploring look of her young friend, and folding her to her heart, +she said, in a low and gentle voice-- + +"Ask not me, my dearest girl; St. Eval shall come and speak for +himself." She kissed her affectionately, and was gone. + +Caroline seated herself on a low couch, and closing her eyes on every +outward object, she gave herself up to thought. Might she indeed be +happy--were the errors of her former years so forgiven, that she would +indeed be blessed with the husband of her choice? Had St. Eval so +conquered pride as again to seek her love--would the blessing of her +parents now sanctify her marriage? it could not be, it was too much +bliss--happiness of which she was utterly unworthy. Time rolled by +unheeded in these meditations; she was quite unconscious that nearly +half an hour had elapsed since Lady Gertrude had left her; scarcely did +it appear five minutes, and yet it must have been more, for it was the +voice of St. Eval himself that roused her, that addressed her as his own +bride. St. Eval himself, who clasped her impetuously to his beating +heart, imprinted one long, lingering kiss upon her cheek and murmured +blessings on her head. He had waited for the return of his sister to the +carriage, in a state of impatience little to be envied, flung himself in +after her, and in a very brief space had heard and heard again every +particular of her interview with Caroline. His doubts wore satisfied, +not a lingering fear remained. + +"Gertrude told me, you said not to her the magic word that will seal my +happiness, though she wrung from you that precious secret of your love," +said the young Lord, after many very fond words had been exchanged +between them, and nearly an hour had passed away in that unrestrained +confidence; "nor have I heard it pass your lips. You have told me that +you love me, Caroline; will you not promise that but a very short time +shall pass, ere you will indeed be mine; that you will not sentence me +to a long probation ere that happy day is fixed?" + +"It is not in my power to answer you, St. Eval," and though her tone was +sportive, her words startled him. "I cannot even promise to be yours; my +fate is not in my own hands." + +"Caroline!" exclaimed the alarmed young man, "what can you mean?" + +"Simply, that I have vowed solemnly and sacredly never to many without +the consent and blessing of my parents. I have given you all I can, to +them I refer you for the rest." + +"Then I am satisfied," replied St. Eval, the flush of joyous excitement +staining his cheek, and rendering his expressive countenance more than +usually handsome, by the animation it produced. + +Mrs. Hamilton, with Emmeline and Ellen, had returned from their ride +rather later than usual, for they had gone to see a friend some few +miles out of town, and finding it near the hour of dinner, they had +dispersed to their dressing-rooms instead of entering the drawing-room +as usual. On inquiring for Caroline, if she had been out with Lady +Gertrude, or was still at home, she heard, to her extreme astonishment, +that Miss Hamilton had not gone out, but that Lord St. Eval had been +with her above an hour, nor had she left him to obey the summons of the +dressing-bell, as usual. A throb of pleasure shot through the heart of +Mrs. Hamilton, she scarcely knew wherefore, for it was no uncommon thing +for Lord St. Eval to spend an hour at her house, but it was that he +should thus have sought the society of Caroline alone. + +"Had either of her sons been with him?" she asked, and the answer was in +the negative. + +Martyn silently concluded her task, for she saw deep thought was on her +lady's brow, which she was too respectful to disturb; an earnest thought +it was, it might have been that silent prayer had mingled with it. Still +was that wish uppermost in Mrs. Hamilton's mind, that she might one day +see her Caroline the happy wife of Lord St. Eval; but when she entered +the drawing-room, words were not needed to explain the scene before her. +Mr. Hamilton had drawn his daughter to him, and was pressing the young +Earl's hand in his with a grasp that spoke volumes. + +"St. Eval, you have been too long the son of my affections, for one +instant to doubt my consent," Mrs. Hamilton heard her husband say, as +she entered; "it is yours, freely, gladly. Speak not of fortune, I would +give my child to you, had you but yourself to offer. But I am but a +secondary personage in this business," he added, playfully; "there is +the enchantress who holds the fate of my Caroline more firmly than I do. +Away with you, St. Eval, plead your cause to her." + +"Caroline, my own, does your happiness depend on my consent, or have you +done this merely for my sake?" murmured Mrs. Hamilton, as her child +clung in silence to her neck, and Lord St. Eval seized her hand and +pressed it to his lips, as if eloquent silence should tell his tale, +too, better than words. Mrs. Hamilton spoke in a voice so low, as to be +heard only by Caroline. + +"Speak to me, love; tell me that St. Eval will be the husband of your +free, unbiased choice, and my fondest blessing shall be yours." +Caroline's answer was inaudible to all, save to the ear of maternal +affection, to her mother it was enough. + +"Take her, St. Eval; my consent, my earnest wish to behold you united +has long been yours; may God in heaven bless you, my children, and make +you happy in each other!" + +Solemnly she spoke; her earnestness was affecting, it struck to their +hearts; for a moment there was silence, which Mrs. Hamilton was the +first to break. + +"Does my Caroline intend appearing at dinner in this costume?" she +asked, playfully, alluding to her daughter's morning dress. Startled and +blushing, Caroline, for the first time, perceived her mother was dressed +for dinner, and her father, determining to banish all appearance of +gravity, held up his watch, which pointed to some few minutes after the +usual dinner-hour. Glad to escape for a few minutes to the solitude of +her own room, Caroline hastily withdrew her hand from St. Eval's +detaining grasp, and smiling a brief farewell, brushed by Emmeline and +Ellen, who were that instant entering, without speaking indeed, but with +very evident marks of confusion, which Mr. Hamilton very quickly +explained to the extreme satisfaction of all parties. + +Caroline was not long before she returned. Happiness had caused her eyes +to sparkle with a radiance her parents had not seen for many a long day; +and they felt as they gazed on her, now indeed was she worthy to be the +honoured wife of St. Eval, and their thoughts were raised in silent +unison to heaven for the blessing thus vouchsafed to them. And scarcely +could Mr. Hamilton restrain the emotion which swelled his bosom, as he +thought, had it not been for the untiring care, the bright example of +that mother, his child, instead of being a happy bride, might now have +been--he shuddered as he thought, and the inward words were checked, he +could not give them vent, they were hidden in the silent recesses of his +own breast; and did not that same thought dwell in the mind of his wife, +when she contrasted the present with the past? It did, but she looked +not on herself as the cause of her child's escape from wretchedness and +sin. Her efforts she knew would have been as naught, without the +blessing of Him whose aid she had ever sought; and if indeed the thought +of her had arrested Caroline on the brink of ruin, it was His work, and +Him alone she praised. She looked on the glowing countenance of her +daughter; she marked the modest gentleness of her demeanour, the +retiring dignity with which she checked the effusions of her own fond +affection, and received the attentions of her devoted lover, and she +felt sure those few moments of solitude had been passed in thanksgiving +and prayer to Him who had pardoned the errors of the past, and granted +such unlooked-for joy. And she guessed aright, for the mind of Caroline +had not been entirely engrossed by the bright and glowing visions which +anticipation in such a moment of our lives is apt to place before us. +Her thoughts during the last year had been secretly under the guidance +of the most rigid self-control, and thus permitted her to raise them +from the happiness of earth to blessedness yet more exalted. Oh! who can +say that religion is the heavy chain that fetters us to gloom and +everlasting sadness; that in chastening the pleasures of earth, it +offers no substantial good in return? True piety, open the heart by its +sweet, refreshing influence, causes us to enjoy every earthly blessing +with a zest the heart in which the love of God is not an inmate will +seek in vain to know. It is piety that strengthens, purifies affection. +Piety, that looks on happiness vouch us here, as harbingers of a state +where felicity will be eternal. Piety that, in lifting up the grateful +soul to God, heightens our joys, and renders that pure and lasting +which would otherwise be evanescent and fleeting. Piety, whose soft and +mildly-burning torch continues to enlighten life, long, long after the +lustre of worldly pleasures has passed away. It was this blessed +feeling, kindled in earliest infancy by the fostering hand of parental +love, which now characterised and composed every emotion of Caroline's +swelling bosom, which bade her feel that this indeed was happiness. With +blushing modesty she received the eagerly-offered congratulations of her +affectionate family; the delighted embrace which Percy in the enthusiasm +of his joy found himself compelled to give her. + +"Now, indeed, may I hope the past will never again cross my mind to +torment me," he whispered to his sister, and wrung St. Eval's hand with +a violence that forced that young man laughingly to cry for mercy. There +had been a shade of unusual gloom shrouding the open countenance and +usually frank demeanour of Percy since his return from Oxford, for which +his parents and sisters could not account, but as he seemed to shrink +from all observation on the subject, they did not ask the cause; but +this unexpected happiness seemed to make him for a few following days as +usual the gayest, merriest member of his amiable family. + +Often in these days of happiness did Caroline think on the qualities +which Lady Gertrude had once said should adorn the wife of her brother. +Faults he could pardon, if they were redeemed by affection, and +ingenuousness unsullied by the slightest artifice. Affection she well +knew she possessed; but she also knew that, to be as unreserved as would +form the happiness of her husband, she must effectually banish that +pride, which she knew still lurked within. Often would she converse on +these things when alone with her mother, and implore her advice as to +the best method of securing not only the love but the esteem of St. +Eval. "Gertrude was quite right in the estimate of her brother's +character," Mrs. Hamilton would at such times observe, her fond heart +fully repaid for past anxiety and disappointment by this confidence in +her child; "and so too are you, dearest, in your idea that not the +faintest sign of pride must mark your intercourse with him. Perhaps he +is more reserved than proud; indeed, in his case, I cannot call it +pride, but it is that kind of reserve which would jar most painfully did +it come in contact with anything resembling pride. Had you grown up such +as you were in childhood, your union with St. Eval, much as you might +think you loved each other, would not have been productive of lasting +happiness to either. Let him see dependence is not merely a profession +which your every action would contradict; from independence spring so +many evils, that I feel sure you will avoid it. It is, I regret to say, +a prevailing error in those circles wherein your rank will entitle you +to mingle; an error that must ever endanger conjugal happiness. When a +woman marries, the world, except as the arbiter of propriety, ought to +be forgotten; all her endeavours to please, to soothe, to cheer, must +still be exerted even more than before marriage, but exerted only for +her husband; not one little pleasing art, not one accomplishment should +be given up, but used as affection dictates, to enhance her value in the +eyes of him whose felicity it should be her principal aim to increase. +You will be placed in an exalted station in the opinion of the world, my +beloved child, a station of temptation, flattery, danger, more so than +has over yet been yours; but I do not tremble now as I did, too +forebodingly, when the world was first opened to your view. You have +learned to mistrust your own strength, to seek it where alone it can be +found, to examine your every action by the Word of God, and with these +feelings you are safe. My Caroline will not fail in duty to her husband +or herself." + +"Nor to you, my mother, my devoted mother!" exclaimed Caroline, as she +fondly kissed her. "It is to you, next to my God, I owe this blessing; +and oh, if it be my lot to be a mother, may I be to my children, as far, +at least, as one so much inferior in piety and virtue can be, what you +have been to me. Oh, might I but resemble you, as my full heart has so +lately longed, St. Eval might be happy!" + +At the earnest entreaty of St. Eval and Caroline, both families +consented that the ceremonial of their marriage should take place in the +same venerable church where the first childish prayers of Caroline had +ascended from a house of God, and the service be performed by the +revered and pious rector of Oakwood, the clergyman who, from her +earliest childhood, she had been taught to respect and love, as the +humble representative of Him whose truths he so ably taught. Caroline +had consented to name the second week of September as the period of her +espousals. The few chosen friends of both families who were to be +invited to the ceremony were to assemble in the hospitable halls of +Oakwood, and earnestly did every member of Mr. Hamilton's family hope +that the long-absent sailor, Edward Fortescue, who was soon expected +home, might arrive in time to be present at the marriage of his cousin. +How the young heart of his orphan sister fluttered with delight at the +thought of beholding him again we will not attempt to describe, but it +was shared with almost equal warmth by Mrs. Hamilton, whose desire was +so great that her gallant nephew, the brave preserver of her husband, +might be present at the approaching joyful event, that she laughingly +told Ellen she certainly would postpone the ceremony till Edward +arrived, whatever opposition she might have to encounter. + +The engagement of the Eight Honourable Earl St. Eval, the heir to the +marquisate of Malvern, embracing such rich possessions, with a plain +gentleman's daughter was a matter of mingled wonder, scorn, admiration, +and applause to the fashionable world; but these opinions and emotions +were little regarded, save as a matter of continual jest to Percy, who +amused himself by collecting all the reports he could, and repeating +them at home, warning them against a marriage which caused such an +universal sensation. It might be supposed this sensation would have been +felt in various ways in the family of Montrose Grahame; but it happened +that Annie was so engrossed with her own plans, her mind so occupied by +one interesting subject, that she and Lord Alphingham had but little +time to think of anything but each other. Annoyed they were indeed, for +all their designs were foiled; St. Eval and Caroline were happy, spite +of their efforts to the contrary. Lady Helen was really so delighted at +the prospects of Caroline, who had ever been a favourite with her, that +she actually exerted herself so much as to call in person to offer her +best wishes, and promise that she would spend the whole winter at +Moorlands, to be present at the ceremony. Lilla was overjoyed, for Mrs. +Hamilton promised she should be among the guests at Oakwood. Mr. +Grahame, whose friendship with Mr. Hamilton would have and did render +him most interested in the event, was at Paris when their engagement was +first published, but his warmly-written letters to his friend proclaimed +his intention of very soon returning to England, but till then +entreating the young couple to accept his sincerest prayers and best +wishes for their happiness, and warmly congratulated Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton on the prospects of their child; but there was a sadness +pervading his letters which gave them pain to note, for they knew too +well the cause. + +The letters of Mary Greville, too, added pleasure to the betrothed. +Informed by Herbert of both past and present events, St. Eval's long +affection for Caroline, which he playfully hoped would solve the mystery +of his not gratifying her wishes, and falling in love with Miss Manvers, +Mary wrote with equal sportiveness, that she was quite satisfied with +his choice, and pleased that his residence at Lago Guardia had enabled +her to become so well acquainted with one about to be so nearly +connected with her Herbert. + +About a week or fortnight before Mr. Hamilton's intended return to +Oakwood, Percy one morning received a letter which appeared to produce +excessive agitation. But as he evidently did not wish it remarked, no +notice was taken, except by Herbert, to whom alone he had shown the +letter, and who seemed equally interested, though not so much agitated +by its contents. To the anxious inquiries of his parents, if individual +embarrassment or distress occasioned Percy's uneasiness, Herbert +answered readily in the negative; that the letter informed them of the +death of an unfortunate individual in whose fate both he and Percy had +been most deeply interested. Trusting in the well-known integrity of +their sons, Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton inquired no farther, and dismissed the +subject; but Percy did not rouse himself from his gloomy abstraction +till startled by intelligence, which regard for his father's friend +Grahame could not permit him to hear with calmness. + +Two mornings after the receipt of that letter, as the family, which the +addition of St. Eval, were sitting together after breakfast, ere they +separated to the various avocations of the day, Lord Henry D'Este +bustled in with a countenance expressive of something extraordinary. + +"Have you heard the news?" was his first eager exclamation. + +"If we had, it would be no news," replied Emmeline, archly; "but we have +heard nothing. Papa has something else to do than to seek out news for +me, ditto the Right Honourable Lord St. Eval. Percy has been suddenly +converted into the spirit of gloom, and to Herbert it is in vain to look +for gossip, so, for pity's sake, satisfy my curiosity." + +"Perhaps you will say I have been exciting it unnecessarily," he +answered. "An elopement is too common a thing now to cause much +astonishment." + +"It depends on the parties," observed Mr. Hamilton. "Who are they?" + +"Those, or rather one of them, I fear, for her father's sake, in whom +you will be too deeply interested,--Lord Alphingham and Miss Grahame." + +"Annie!" burst from Caroline's lips, in an accent of distress that +struck all, and fell somewhat, painfully on Lord St. Eval's ear, when +starting from the seat she had occupied near him, she sprung forward, +and wildly continued, "when--when? Lord Henry, for pity's sake, tell me! +is there no time? Can they not be overtaken? When did they go?" + +Bewildered at the wild earnestness of her manner, at the muttered +execration of Percy, Lord Henry was for a moment silent; but, on the +repeated entreaty of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, he said that the particulars +were not yet all known, except that she had been staying with her +friend, that same lady of rank in whose family Miss Malison had been +installed; that from her house the elopement had taken place, when, he +did not exactly know, the report had only that morning gained credit. +Lady Helen was not in the least aware of what had passed, nor would she, +in all probability, till Annie's own letter announced it, as she turned +a careless ear to all that her friends had hinted. He greatly feared, +however, that it was useless to think of overtaking them; they had been +seen and recognised, on the road between York and Berwick, by a friend +of his, three days previous. He had at first regarded his friend's +letter as a mere jest, but finding he had written the same to many +others, and that the report was gaining ground, he felt sufficient +interest in Mr. Grahame to discover the truth, that he might be informed +of it, and take measures accordingly, and as Grahame was from home, he +thought the best thing he could do was to tell the whole story to Mr. +Hamilton. + +"And is there indeed no hope? Can they not be overtaken?" again demanded +Caroline, almost choked with an agitation for which even her parents +could not account. + +Lord Henry did not think there was the slightest possibility, and +unable to control her emotion, for she could not forget the long years +she had regarded Annie as her friend, the favourite companion of her +childhood, Caroline sunk, pale as death, on the nearest seat. Her mother +and St. Eval approached her in some alarm, the former to demand the +cause of this agitation, and implore her to be calm; the latter to +connect, with a swelling heart and trembling frame, this deep emotion +with the words of Lord Alphingham, which he vainly endeavoured to +forget; but Percy alone had power to restore her to any degree of +composure, taking her trembling hand in his, he whispered a few words, +and their effect was instantaneous. + +"Thank God, she will be at least his wife!" escaped Caroline's quivering +lips, and then burst into tears. + +"Mother, do not ask more now. St. Eval, do not doubt my sister, her +agitation arose for Miss Grahame alone, not for the villain, the +cold-hearted villain, Alphingham!" exclaimed Percy, in a low but +impressive voice, as he alternately addressed his mother and the Earl, +and then, as if fearing their further questions, he hastily turned away +to join his father in demanding every possible information from Lord +Henry; and perceiving that Caroline was becoming calm, and also that St. +Eval looked somewhat disturbed, Mrs. Hamilton followed her son to the +other end of the room. Still St. Eval spoke not, and Caroline, as she +read the reproach, the doubt expressed upon his features, for a moment +felt her natural pride swelling high within her, that he could for one +minute permit a doubt of her truth to enter his mind; but her +resolution, her mother's advice, the observation of Lady Gertrude, all +rose to combat with returning pride, and they conquered. + +"Eugene, dearest Eugene," she said, as she extended her hand towards +him, "you have, indeed, every reason to look disturbed. In my deep +anxiety for her whom I so long loved as my friend, I forgot that my +agitation might indeed confirm the unworthy tale you heard. Forgive me, +Eugene; I know that I have pained you, but, indeed, I meant it not. If +Lord Alphingham did cross my mind, it was in detestation, in abhorrence, +that he should thus have acted. I trembled for Annie, for her alone, for +the fearful fate that, when Lord Henry first spoke, I believed must be +her lot. Were I at liberty to disclose all, you would not wonder such +should have been my feelings, Eugene," she added, in an accent of gentle +reproach. "Must I indeed solemnly and sacredly assure you, that my +agitation was occasioned by no lingering affection for Lord Alphingham? +will nothing else satisfy you? Is it kind, is it generous thus to doubt +me?" + +Softened at once, ashamed of his own jealous tendency, the young Earl +could only implore her forgiveness, assure her he had not the faintest +doubt remaining; and suggesting, air would revive her sooner than +anything, he drew her to the open window of the adjoining room, which +looked out on the little garden, and there they remained in apparently +earnest conversation, till Caroline, to her extreme astonishment, was +summoned by her cousin to luncheon, and Lord St. Eval suddenly +discovered he had permitted the whole morning to slip away in idleness, +when he imagined he had so very much to do. + +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton were more grieved than surprised at the +intelligence they had heard; but in what manner to act, what measures to +take they knew not. Grahame was expected to arrive in England on the +morrow or the next day at the farthest, and his agony they dreaded to +witness; they feared lest reports should reach him ere he was in any way +prepared, and Mr. Hamilton determined on travelling instantly to Dover, +that he might be there ready to receive him, and console to the best of +his ability this mistaken but truly affectionate father. Percy, rousing +himself, entered with activity into all his father's plans; but Mrs. +Hamilton fancied that he too had some plan to follow up, which his +absence two or three days from home confirmed. Nor was it idle sympathy +she felt; that same day she sought the residence of Lady Helen. + +Scarcely ever did she enter that house without being struck by the +melancholy pervading it. Wrapped in her own pleasures, her own desires +and amusements, Annie never cast one thought on her mother, whose +declining health it would have been her duty to tend and soothe; indeed +she scarcely ever entered her room, and believing her parent's ailments +were all fancy, made it a rule to take no notice of them. Cecil liked +not gloom and quiet, and his fashionable cousins occupied almost all his +time. He could not comprehend, much less return the deep affection his +mother felt for him; and Lilla, whose naturally warm heart and right +principles would have made her an affectionate attendant on her mother's +couch, was seldom at home to perform her part. But already had Lady +Helen felt the difference a year's residence with Mrs. Douglas had made +in her younger girl; already her indolent nature felt the comfort of her +presence, and bitterly regretted when her short vacations were at an +end, for then she was indeed alone. + +On being admitted, Mrs. Hamilton fancied somewhat eagerly, the first +person she encountered at Lady Helen's was her young friend, clad, it +seemed, for walking, with traces of anxiety and sorrow written on her +countenance. + +"The very person I was about to seek," she exclaimed, in a voice of +intense relief, springing down the stairs to reach her friend. "Dearest +Mrs. Hamilton, mamma--Annie--" The words choked her, and she burst into +tears. + +"Compose yourself, love, I know all; only tell me how your mother bears +the shock," whispered Mrs. Hamilton, instantly penetrating at once the +truth, that either the report had reached Lady Helen, or she had +received the intelligence direct from her daughter; and anxious to +escape the curious eyes of the domestics, who were in the hall, she +hastily yet kindly drew the weeping Lilla to the nearest parlour, and, +closing the door, succeeded in hearing all she desired. Lilla said, her +mother, only an hour before, had received a letter from Annie, briefly +announcing her marriage, and informing her they intended very shortly to +embark for the Netherlands from Leith, thence to make a tour in Germany +and Italy, which would prevent their returning to England for some time, +when she hoped all present irritation at her conduct would have +subsided; that her father's severity had tended to this step. Had he +been kind, and like other fathers, she would have sacrificed her own +desires, conscious that his reason for prohibiting her union with +Alphingham was good, however it might be secret; but when from her +childhood her every wish had been unreasonably thwarted, she was +compelled to choose in such a case for herself. She should be sorry to +live in enmity with her father, but even if she did, she never could +regret the step she had taken. To her mother she wrote as if assured of +her forgiveness, or rather her continued favour; forgiveness she did not +seem to think it at all necessary to ask, saying, she was sure her kind +and indulgent mother would not regret her union with Lord Alphingham, +when she solemnly declared it had made her happier than she had ever +been before. Such Lilla said were the contents of her letter; but the +warm-hearted girl could not refer without indignation to the utter want +of affection which breathed throughout. Her mother, Lilla continued to +say, had been in a most alarming state from the time she received the +letter, but she fancied occasioned more by the dread of what her father +would say on his return, than from Annie's conduct. + +When Mrs. Hamilton saw Lady Helen, she felt that Lilla was right. The +unhappy mother reproached her own carelessness, indolence, and Annie's +ingratitude, but it was evident the dread of her husband was uppermost +in her mind--a dread which made her so extremely ill, from a succession +of violent and uncontrolled hysterics, that Mrs. Hamilton did not leave +her the whole of that day; nor would she permit the unhappy father to +enter his wife's apartment on his return, till she had exacted from him +a promise to forbear all reproaches towards his suffering wife, all +allusions to the past. + +With the stern brevity of the injured, Grahame addressed his disobedient +child. His forgiveness and his blessing he sent, though he said she had +asked for neither; that he bore no enmity to her, he wrote; his home and +his heart were ever open to receive her, should she again require the +protection of the one, the affection of the other. She had chosen for +herself; linked her fate with one against whom many tongues had spoken, +and he could only pray that her present happiness might never change. +Lord Alphingham he did not name. Lady Helen's letter was a curious +mixture of reproach and affection, complaint and congratulation; and +Annie might have found it difficult to discover in what manner she was +affected towards the Viscount, or with regard to the elopement itself. +Perhaps of all the letters she received from home, Lilla's was the most +irritating to her, for it was written in all the bitter indignation, the +unchecked reproaches of a young and ardent spirit, in whose eyes the +heartlessness of her letter was inexcusable, and she wrote as she +thought. Annie, as might have been expected, deigned her no reply. A few +languidly written letters her mother received from her during her tour; +but the chief of her correspondence was reserved for Miss Malison and +the lady who had so ably assisted their secret plans. The friendly +influence of Mr. Hamilton succeeded, after a few days, in restoring his +friend to comparative outward composure, although the wound within, he +too sadly felt, was beyond his power to heal. + +A few days passed in peace. Mrs. Hamilton and her family were +anticipating with pleasure the quiet happiness of Oakwood, and the event +then to take place. Scarcely a week intervened before their departure, +when they were one afternoon startled by the appearance of Grahame, +whose countenance bore the pallid hue of death, and every action denoted +the most fearful agitation. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, Caroline and St. +Eval, were alone present, and they gazed on him in unfeigned alarm. + +"Hamilton, I start for Brussels to-night," was his salutation, as he +entered. + +"Brussels!" repeated Mr. Hamilton. "Grahame, you are beside yourself. +What affairs can call you to Brussels so suddenly?" + +"Affairs--business; aye, of such weight, I cannot rest till they are +attended to. Hamilton, you are astonished; you think me mad; oh, would +to God I were!" and striking his forehead with his clenched hand, he +paced the room in agony. + +Ere his friend could approach or address him, he suddenly paused before +Caroline, who was watching him in alarm and commiseration, and grasping +her arm, with a pressure that pained her, he said, in a voice which +blanched her cheek with horror-- + +"Hamilton, look on this girl, and, as you love me, answer me. Could you +be a Roman father, did you see her dishonoured,--the victim, the wilful +victim of a base, a treacherous, miserable villain?--say, could you wash +away the blackening stain with blood--with her blood--or his, or both? +Speak to me--counsel me. My child, my child!" he groaned aloud. + +"Grahame, you are ill; my dear friend, you know not what you say," +exclaimed Mr. Hamilton, terrified both at his wildness and his words. +"Come with me till this strange mood has passed; I entreat it as a +favour--come." + +"Passed--till this mood has passed! Hamilton, it will never pass till +the grave has closed over Annie and myself. Oh, Hamilton, my friend, I +had reconciled myself to this marriage; taught myself to believe that, +as his wife, she might be happy; and--oh, God! can I say the words?--she +is not his wife--he is already married." His trembling limbs refused +support, and he sunk, overcome by his emotion, on a chair. Without a +minute's pause, a moment's hesitation, and ere her father could find +words to reply, Caroline sprung forward, and kneeling beside the +wretched father, she seized his hand-- + +"Be calm, be comforted, dearest Mr. Grahame," she exclaimed, in a voice +that caused him to gaze at her with astonishment. "It is a mistaken tale +you have heard; a cruel falsehood, to disturb your peace. Lord +Alphingham was married, but Annie is now his lawful wedded wife; the +partner of his youth, the devoted woman whom for eight years he +deserted, is no more. She died the day preceding that which united Lord +Alphingham to your child. I speak truth, Mr. Grahame; solemnly, +sacredly, I affirm it. Percy will tell you more; I was pledged to +secrecy. On her deathbed she demanded a solemn promise from all who knew +her tale, never to divulge it, lest it should prove to the discredit of +her cruel husband, whom her last accents blessed. I promised Percy it +should be sacred, unless an emergency demanded it. Be comforted, Mr. +Grahame, indeed, I speak the truth. Lord Alphingham was free, restrained +by no tie, when he was united to your child." Rapidly, hurriedly, she +had spoken, for she trembled at the wild gaze Grahame had fixed upon +her. Caroline's voice rung clear and distinct upon his ear, and every +word brought comfort, still he spoke not; but when she ceased, when +slowly, more impressively her last words were spoken, he uttered a faint +cry, and folding her slight form convulsively to his heart, sobbed like +an infant on her shoulder. Thoughts unutterable thronged the minds of +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton as they too listened with fascinated eagerness to +Caroline's words; thoughts, not only of the present but the past, rushed +quickly to their minds. A year previous Lord Alphingham's wife still +lived; though he, villain as he was, had heeded not the sacred tie. Well +could they enter into the blessed relief her words had brought to the +distracted father. Mr. Hamilton permitted some minutes to elapse in +silence, and then gently withdrawing Caroline from Grahame's still +convulsive hold, said a few words, in a voice which, though low, +expressed that kindly sympathy which seldom fails to reach the inmost +soul; and finally succeeded in passing his arm through that of his +friend, and leading him to an adjoining room, where, after a time, +Grahame conquered his agitation sufficiently to give a connected account +of the means through which he had learned the information which had so +distracted him. Caroline's words and the influence of his friend +restored him to comparative composure; but all was not at peace within +until Percy had obeyed the summons of his father, and the information of +his sister was confirmed in every point by him. He related the tale of +Mrs. Amesfort, with which our readers are already well acquainted, with +the addition of her death, of which the letter he received a few days +previous had informed him. Many affecting interviews he had had with +her, in which she spoke, of her husband, her mother, her child, so +fondly, that the tears often started to the eyes of Percy, though her +own were dry. In parting from him, she had again implored him not to +divulge her secret, unless the interest of her child demanded it, or he +saw urgent occasion. + +"Let not the breath of calumny sully the name of my child," she said, +grasping his hand with a painful effort. "Let her not be looked on as a +child of shame, when her birth is as pure and noble as any in the land. +If her birth be questioned, let the whole world know she is the daughter +of Lord Alphingham. In my mother's care is the certificate of my +marriage, also of the christening of my Agnes. But if nothing be +demanded, if her lot be happy, it is better both for father and daughter +that they remain unknown to each other." + +Percy had made the solemn promise she demanded, but the remembrance of +her pale features, her drooping form, had haunted him on his return +home, and caused that deep gloom his family had remarked. It was more +than a week after Mrs. Amesfort's death, before her afflicted mother +could write the tidings to the young man, who, on hearing of Annie's +conduct, had instantly and actively set about obtaining the exact date +of the unfortunate lady's death, and also that of the Viscount's hasty +marriage in Scotland. The result was most satisfactory; rather more than +a week had elapsed between the two events, and his marriage with Annie +was, consequently, sacred and binding. Percy also said, Mrs. Morley had +mentioned her intention of instantly returning to Ireland with the +little Agnes, from whom she fervently prayed she might never be +compelled to part. + +Believed, and truly thankful, Grahame consulted with his friends on the +best plan to pursue to silence the rumours which, having overheard in a +public coffeehouse, would, he had no doubt, be immediately circulated +over the town. Mrs. Morley said, she had written to inform Lord +Alphingham of the death of his broken-hearted wife, enclosing one from +the ill-fated Agnes herself. He was, therefore, perfectly aware of the +validity of his second marriage, for Percy had inquired and found the +letter had been forwarded; there was no need of communication with him +on that point. Grahame's first care was to travel to Scotland, and +obtain the registry of their marriage; his next, to proceed to Brussels, +with Mr. Hamilton, and coolly and decisively inform Lord Alphingham +that, unless the ceremony was publicly solemnized a second time, in his +presence, and before proper witnesses, other proceedings would be +entered upon against him. Astonished and somewhat alarmed as Lord and +Lady Alphingham were at his unexpected appearance, the former had too +many sins on his conscience to submit to a public _exposé_, which he +might justly fear was intended in this threat, and, with great apparent +willingness, he consented. The ceremony was again performed; Grahame +possessed himself of the certificate, and left Brussels, with the +half-formed resolution that, while Lord Alphingham lived, he would never +see his child again. The death of the Right Honourable Viscountess +Alphingham, and the subsequent marriage in Scotland of the Eight +Honourable Lord Viscount Alphingham with Miss Grahame, appeared in all +the newspapers. The splendour of the second solemnization of their +nuptials in Brussels was the next theme of wonder and gossip, and by the +time that subject was exhausted, London had become deserted, and Lord +and Lady Alphingham might probably have returned to the metropolis +without question or remark; but such was not Lord Alphingham's +intention. He feared that probably were his history publicly known he +might be shunned for the deceit he had displayed; and he easily obtained +Annie's glad consent to fix their residence for a few years in Paris. +Irritated as in all probability he was, when he found himself again +fettered, yet he so ably concealed this irritation, that his wife +suspected it not, and for a time she was happy. + +As Lord and Lady Alphingham are no longer concerned in our tale, having +nothing more in common with those in whom, we trust, our readers are +much more interested, we may here formally dismiss them in a few words. +They lived, but if true happiness dwells only with the virtuous and +good, with the upright and the noble, it gilded not their lot; but if +those who are well acquainted with the morality of the higher classes of +the French capital can pronounce that it dwells there, then, indeed, +might they be said to possess it, for such was their lives. They +returned not again to England, but lived in France and Italy, +alternately. Alphingham, callous to every better and softer feeling, +might have been happy, but not such was the fate of Annie. Bitterly, ere +she died, did she regret her folly and disobedience; remorse was +sometimes busy within, though no actual guilt dimmed her career: she +drowned the voice of conscience in the vortex of frivolity and fashion. +But the love she bore for Alphingham was the instrument of retribution, +her husband neglected, despised, and frequently deserted her. Let no +woman unite herself with sin, in the vain hope of transforming it to +virtue. Such thoughts had not, indeed, been Annie's, when wilfully she +sought her fate. She knew not the man she had chosen for her husband; +she disregarded the warnings she had heard. Fatal delusion! she found, +too late, the fate her will had woven was formed of knotty threads, the +path that she had sought beset with thorns, from which she could not +break. No children blessed her lot, and it was better thus--for they +would have found but little happiness. The fate of Lord Alphingham's +child, the little Agnes, was truly happy in her own innocence; she lived +on for many years in ignorance of her real rank and the title of her +father, under the careful guidance of that relative to whom her mother's +last words had tenderly consigned her. + +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton remained but little longer in town; Caroline's +_trousseau_ was quite completed, for but very few weeks now intervened +ere her marriage. Lady Gertrude had devoted herself to the young Earl, +and remained with him superintending the improvements and embellishments +of his beautiful estate, Castle Terryn, in the vicinity of the Tamar, on +the Cornwall side, which was being prepared with the greatest taste and +splendour. Lady Gertrude was to remain with her brother till the week +previous to the wedding, when she joined her family at Oakwood, where +they had been staying since their departure from London, at the earnest +persuasions of both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton. Seldom had the banks of the +placid Dart been so gay as they were on this occasion; the beautiful +villas scattered around were all taken by the friends of the parties +about to be so nearly connected. Rejoicings were not only confined to +the higher class; the poor, for many miles round, hailed the expected +marriage of Miss Hamilton as an occasion of peculiar and individual +felicity. Blessings on her lot, prayers for her welfare, that Lord St. +Eval might prove himself worthy of her, were murmured in many a rustic +cot, and every one was employed in earnest thought as to the best, the +most respectful mode of testifying their humble sympathy in the +happiness of their benefactors. Such were the feelings with which high +and low regarded the prosperity of the good. + + +END OF VOL. I. + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Mother's Recompense, Volume I. +by Grace Aguilar + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MOTHER'S RECOMPENSE, VOLUME I. *** + +***** This file should be named 12361-8.txt or 12361-8.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/1/2/3/6/12361/ + +Produced by Charles Franks and the Distributed Proofreaders Team + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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For +example an eBook of filename 10234 would be found at: + + https://www.gutenberg.org/1/0/2/3/10234 + +or filename 24689 would be found at: + https://www.gutenberg.org/2/4/6/8/24689 + +An alternative method of locating eBooks: + https://www.gutenberg.org/GUTINDEX.ALL + + diff --git a/old/12361-8.zip b/old/12361-8.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..5cbde5c --- /dev/null +++ b/old/12361-8.zip diff --git a/old/12361.txt b/old/12361.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..04c194f --- /dev/null +++ b/old/12361.txt @@ -0,0 +1,10901 @@ +Project Gutenberg's The Mother's Recompense, Volume I., by Grace Aguilar + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: The Mother's Recompense, Volume I. + A Sequel to Home Influence in Two Volumes. + +Author: Grace Aguilar + +Release Date: May 16, 2004 [EBook #12361] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MOTHER'S RECOMPENSE, VOLUME I. *** + + + + +Produced by Charles Franks and the Distributed Proofreaders Team + + + + +THE MOTHER'S RECOMPENSE; + + +A SEQUEL TO HOME INFLUENCE. + + +BY GRACE AGUILAR. + + + + +IN TWO VOLUMES. + +VOL. I. + + +LEIPZIG + +BERNHARD TAUCHNITZ + +1859. + + + + +PREFACE. + + +The domestic story of "Home Influence," and its Sequel, the present +volume, were written in the early part of the year 1836, and the entire +work was completed when its author was little above the age of nineteen; +and, although no portion of it was published till some years after its +composition, but little alteration was made in the original plan. + +The labours of my dear child were unceasing, and from the hour when she +could read, it may truly be stated that she learned to write; her +contributions to the current literature of the day, her valuable works +upon religious subjects, and others of a lighter character, most of +which have been reprinted in other lands, all testify to a mind of no +common stamp; and here, in reply to numerous questions relative to her +literary remains, I may state that Grace Aguilar has left many excellent +works in manuscript, both in prose and verse; some of which may, at a +future day, be presented to the public. + +I have been induced to publish "The Mother's Recompense," in compliance +with the repeated solicitations of many friends, but in doing so I feel +it incumbent on me to state that, unlike its predecessor, it has not +received the advantage of that correction, which later years and ripened +judgment would doubtless have cast around it. A long and fatal illness +prevented its revision for the press; the circumstances of which will be +found detailed in a short memoir, accompanying the last edition of "Home +Influence." The universal voice of praise, which attended the +publication of that work, it was not permitted her to enjoy,--an +all-wise Creator called her to himself. + +It was ever my dear child's wish to aid, by the example of her pen, the +education of the Heart. It was her desire, in the truthful +exemplification of character, to point out to the youthful of her own +sex the paths of rectitude and virtue. The same kindly love--the same +heartfelt charity--the same spirit of devotion, which breathes through +every line in "Home Influence," will be found pervading the pages of the +present work. + +If, then, the Home Education of the Hamilton Family be well traced and +faithfully delineated in "Home Influence, a Tale for Mothers and +Daughters," its _effect_ will be found illustrated in the "Mother's +Recompense;" there, as its dear author writes, will still further be +portrayed the cares, anxieties, and ultimate reward of maternal love. + +SARAH AGUILAR. + +_December_, 1850. + + + + +THE MOTHER'S RECOMPENSE + +VOL. I. + + + + +CHAPTER I. + + +_From Emmeline Hamilton to Mary Greville_. + +London, January, 18-- + +At length, dearest Mary, I may write to you; at length indulge my +long-controlled wishes. My conscience has given me permission now, +though I once thought I never could again. We parted in August, and it +is now January; and except during our little tour, you have not had one +line from me, but very many more than one from Caroline and Ellen. I +used to wrong them, but I am glad I adhered to mamma's advice and my +resolution, painful as it has been; for it did seem hard that I, who +consider myself even more my dear Mary's own friend, should not address +you when my sister and cousin did. And now to explain this riddle, for +though mamma has excused my silence to you, I am quite sure she has not +told you the real truth. She would not expose my silly weakness, and +therefore prepare yourself for a most humiliating confession, which +will, in all probability, lower me ten degrees in your estimation. +However, truth must he told, and so it shall be with all the necessary +regularity and precision. _You_ know, almost better than any one else, +how very much I disliked the thought of leaving dear happy Oakwood, and +residing any part of the year in London. You often used to warn me, when +I have thus spoken, against permitting such fancies to obtain too much +dominion; but I did not follow your advice, dear Mary, but indulged them +till, of course, they became so heightened that the last month of our +sojourn at Oakwood was embittered by the anticipation. I saw you thought +me foolish, and I knew that mamma and papa's plans could not be altered +to please my fancy, and that my confessed distaste to them would give +pain to both: therefore, I concealed my dislike, but instead of doing +all I could to conquer it, encouraged every gloomy anticipation to the +very utmost. I found, during our delightful tour through the south of +England, I could enjoy myself, but still the thoughts of London, and +masters, and strangers, and the fancy our style of living would be so +different in the metropolis to what it was in Oakwood, and that I should +not see nearly as much of mamma, all chose to come, like terrifying +spectres, to scare away the present pleasure. + +We visited Oxford, although completely out of our way, in order that we +might see the residence of my brothers. There Percy's wild mirth and +eloquent descriptions partly banished my ill-humour, but as I neared +London all my fancied evils returned to me again. When we first arrived, +which was in September, this huge city was, comparatively speaking, a +desert; for all the fashionables were out ruralizing. Mamma was not, I +believe, sorry for this, for she wished us to have full six or seven +months' hard study before she entered at all into society. Ellen and I, +of course, will have more, but Caroline is to make her regular _entree_ +in March or April, and therefore must be drilled accordingly. First-rate +masters were instantly engaged; indeed, papa had written to many before +we arrived, that no time should be lost, and as almost all their pupils +were from London, we had the choice of hours, which was very agreeable, +although at that time I did not feel inclined to think anything +agreeable, being accustomed to no instruction save that bestowed by Miss +Harcourt and mamma; professors of music, drawing, French, Italian, +German (which Caroline is seized with a violent fancy to acquire, and +which I deign to learn, because I should like to read Klopstock in the +original), and even what I term a lady professor of embroidery, which +Caroline has succeeded in tormenting mamma to let her have--_entre +nous_, it is only because she has taught Annie Grahame; all these, my +dear Mary, presented a most formidable array, and for the first month I +did not choose to profit by their instructions in the least. I gave full +vent to all the dislike I felt to them. I encouraged indolence to a +degree that frequently occasioned a reproof from Miss Harcourt. I could +not bear their mode of teaching; the attention so many things required +was in my present state a most painful exertion, and I almost made an +inward determination to show mamma that all her endeavours were lost on +me. I would not learn when everything was so changed. Do not throw away +my letter in despair of your friend, dearest Mary; only read to the end, +and perhaps my character may be in some measure redeemed. There was a +weight on my spirits I could not, because I would not, remove. I became +ill-tempered and petulant without cause; before papa and mamma I tried +to restrain it, but did not always succeed. Percy and Herbert both +spoke to me on this unwarrantable change; and I think almost for the +first time in my life I saw Percy seriously angry with me, for I had +even shown my irritation at his interference. I told him I had a right +to act and feel as I pleased. Herbert looked sorry, and desisted in his +reasonings when he found I would not listen. Percy's evident irritation +and the reproaches of my own conscience added not a little to my +uncomfortable feelings, as you may suppose. I looked back to what I had +been at Oakwood, and the contrast of my past and present self really +gave me much cause for misery. It was just before my brothers returned +to college I wrote to you a long, very long letter, in which I gave more +than enough vent to my silly, I should say sinful feelings. Several +hours I had employed in its composition, and to obtain these, neglected +my exercises, etc, for my masters, and caused more than one for several +days to make a formal complaint of my indolence and carelessness to Miss +Harcourt. Her remonstrances, I am ashamed to confess, only had the +effect of increasing my ill-temper. Well; I concluded at length my +epistle to you, which, had you received it, would have been a trial of +patience indeed; for it consisted of ten or twelve closely-written +pages, in which I had so magnified my feelings of discontent and +unhappiness, that any one must have fancied I had not one single +blessing left. I was folding and preparing to seal it, when mamma +entered my room. I must tell you that as yet I had not had one reproof +from her lips, though I am quite sure I deserved it long before; I used +to see her look very grieved at any burst of petulance from me, but she +had never spoken on the subject. I almost trembled when she appeared, +for I knew that morning Miss Harcourt had said she must inform her of +Mons. Deville and Signor Rozzi's continued complaints. Without entering +on that subject, however, she sat down by me, and with one of her own +sweet smiles, which reproached me a great deal more than words, she +asked me if I really were going to seal and send that long letter of +confidence to you without having shown or told any part of it to her. +She might well ask, dear Mary, for I had never written a line before +which I had kept from her; but my conscience told me she would not, +could not approve of this, and therefore I certainly did wish I could +have sent it without telling her anything about it. What deceit, too! I +hear you exclaim. Yes, dear Mary; and before this tale of shame is over, +you will see still more clearly how one fault makes many. I did not +answer her question, but remained sulkily silent. + +"Will my Emmeline think me a harsh intruder on her private thoughts, if +I say I cannot let this letter go till I have seen at least some parts +of its contents?" she said very mildly, but so firmly I had no power to +resist her; and when she asked if I would not, as I always did, read her +some portions, I answered, pettishly, if she read any she might as well +read all. She looked deeply grieved, and my heart painfully smote me the +moment the words were said; but I was too proud at that moment to show +any marks of contrition, and all the time she was reading I continued +working myself up to increased ill-humour. + +"Are you indeed so very unhappy, my dear Emmeline?" were the only words +mamma said, as she laid down, the last sheet and looked in my face, +with a tear trembling in her eye. I turned away, for I felt too +irritated and cross to give way to the emotion I always feel when I see +her grieved, and I was determined not to answer. "And do you prefer," +she continued, "seeking the sympathy of a young girl like yourself to +that of a mother, who has always endeavoured not only to sympathise +with, but to soothe the sorrows of her children?" Still I would not +answer, and she added, mildly, "Do you not think, Emmeline, Mary would +have been better pleased if you had written to her rather in a lighter +strain? do you not think, if you were to try and shake off these painful +fancies, you could write another and less desponding letter--one that I +might give you my full and free permission to send, which, sorry as I am +to say it, I cannot with this?" + +Mild as were her words and manner, the import of what she said put the +finishing stroke to my ill-temper. "If I may not write as I like, I will +not write at all," I passionately exclaimed, and seizing the sheet +nearest to me tore it asunder, and would have done the same with the +rest, had not mamma gently laid her hand on my arm, uttering my name in +an accent of surprise and sorrow; my irritable and sinful feelings found +vent in a most violent flood of tears. + +Will you not think, dearest Mary, I am writing of Caroline, and not of +myself; does it not resemble the scenes of my sister's childhood? Can +you believe that this is an account of your Emmeline, whose sweetness of +temper and gentleness of disposition you have so often extolled? But it +was I who thus forgot myself--I, who once believed nothing ever could +make me passionate or angry, and in one minute I was both--had excited +myself till I became so even against my nature, and with whom?--even my +mother, my kind, devoted mother, who has ever done so much for me, whom +in my childhood, when I knew her worth much less than I do now, I had +never caused to shed a tear. Oh, Mary, I cannot tell you what I felt the +moment those passionate words escaped me. I may truly say I did not cry +from anger, but from the most bitter, the most painful self-reproach. I +think her usual penetration must have discovered this, for if she had +thought my tears were really those of passion, she would not, could not +have acted as she did. + +She drew me gently to her, and kissed me without speaking. I threw my +arms round her neck, and in a voice almost choked by sobs, implored her +again and again to forgive me; that I did not mean to answer her so +disrespectfully--that I knew I had become a very wicked girl, but that I +really did feel very unhappy. For a few minutes she was silent, and I +could see was struggling to suppress the tears my unusual conduct had +occasioned. I will make no apology, dearest Mary, for entering on such +minute details; for I know how you love my mother, and that every word +she says is _almost_ as precious to you as to her own children--_quite_ +it cannot be; and I give you this account also, that you may know me as +I am, and not imagine I am so free from faults as I know you once +believed me. Oh, when I have looked back on that day, I have felt so +painfully humiliated, I would gladly banish the recollection; but it is +better for me to remember it, lest I should fancy myself better than I +am. Every word she said in that gentle and persuasive tone was engraved +upon my heart, even as she spoke. She easily and fully convinced me of +my sinfulness in thus permitting imaginary evils to make me so +miserable: for that they were but imaginary it was easy to discover. Not +a single blessing could I say I had lost. All I loved were around me, in +health and happiness--every comfort of life was the same; and could it +be possible, mamma said, that the mere departure from a favourite +residence, and only for a few months, could render me so completely +blind to the many blessings my Heavenly Father had scattered around me. +As she spoke, a film appeared removed from my eyes, and the enormity of +my conduct stood for the first time in its true colours before me. I +saw--I knew how sinful I had been; and bitterly I regretted that I had +not confessed every feeling to mamma, instead of hiding them, as I had +done, in my own heart, and brooding on them till it became a kind of +pleasure to do so, and till fancied evils produced real ones. I wept +bitterly while she spoke, for to find how completely I had created +misery for myself was no agreeable matter of reflection, and my remorse +was heightened when mamma said, "You have disappointed us not a little, +my dear Emmeline; for I will no longer conceal from you that the little +tour we took on our way to London was originally planned by your father +and myself, to reconcile you to a change of residence. We saw how much +you regretted leaving Oakwood; nor did we wonder at it, for such +feelings were most natural to one of your disposition; and therefore, +instead of travelling direct, and suddenly changing the scenes of our +beautiful Devonshire for the confinement of this huge city, we hoped by +visiting various places, and giving you new objects of reflection, to +lessen your regret, and make the change of residence less painfully +abrupt." As well as I could, I expressed my sorrow and repentance, and +promised to use every endeavour to atone for the past, and become all +that she and papa wished me. + +"I believe you, my own Emmeline," my kind mother said, as she again +kissed me, and her voice was no longer so sorrowfully grave as it had +been at first. "I am sure, now you know all the pain you were inflicting +on both your parents, every effort will be put in force to remove it." +Did I deserve this speech, dear Mary? I do not think I did; for I often +saw by mamma's countenance I had grieved her, and yet made no effort to +control myself, and so I told her. She smiled her own sweet, dear smile +of approbation, and thanking me for my candour, said-- + +"If I say that by indulging in these gloomy fancies and appearing +discontented, and repining when so many blessings are around you, my +Emmeline will be doing her mother a real injury, by rendering my +character questionable, not only in the eyes of the world, but of my +most valued friends, will she not do all in her power to become her own +light-hearted self again?" + +"Injuring your character, dearest mother!" I exclaimed, with much +surprise; "in what manner?" + +"I will tell you, my love," she replied; "there are many, not only of my +acquaintances, but my friends, those whose opinions I really value, who +believe I have been acting very wrongly all these years, in never having +permitted you and Caroline to visit London. They think by this strict +retirement I have quite unfitted you both for the station your rank +demands you should fill. That by constantly living alone with us, and +never mingling in society, you have imbibed notions that, to say the +least, may be old-fashioned and romantic, and which will make you both +feel uncomfortable when you are introduced in London. These fears never +entered my mind; I wished you to receive ideas that were somewhat +different to the generality of Fashion's dictates, and I did not doubt +but that the uncomfortable feeling, against which the letters of my +friends often warned me, would very quickly be removed. But since we +have been here--I do not wish to grieve you more, my dear Emmeline--I +must confess your conduct has been productive to me of the most painful +self-reproach. I thought, indeed, my friends were right, and that for +years I had been acting on an injudicious plan, and that instead of my +measures tending to future happiness, they were only productive of pain +and misery, which, had I done as other mothers of my station, might have +been avoided." + +"Oh! do not, pray do not think so," I exclaimed, for she had spoken so +sorrowfully, I could not bear it. "I formed my own misery, dearest +mother; you had nothing to do with it." + +"You think so now, my love," she answered, with her usual fondness; "but +if my friends see you gloomy and sad, and evidently discontented, +longing for pleasures which are not offered to you in London, only +dwelling on visions of the past, and notions tending to the indulgence +of romance, what will they think? will not my judgment be called in +question? and more, they know how very much I prefer a country to a +London life, domestic pleasures, to those of society, and they may +imagine, and with some probability, that to indulge my selfish wishes, +I have disregarded the real interests of my children." + +"They cannot, they will not think so," I passionately said. "They can +never have known you who form such conclusions." Would you not have +agreed with me, dear Mary, and can you not fancy the wretchedness +mamma's words inflicted? + +"My love," she replied, with a smile, "they will not fancy they do not +know me; they will rather imagine they must have been deceived in their +opinion; that I am not what I may have appeared to them some few years +ago. The character of a mother, my Emmeline, is frequently judged of by +the conduct of her children; and such conclusions are generally correct, +though, of course, as there are exceptions to every rule, there are to +this, and many a mother may have been unjustly injured in the estimation +of the world, by the thoughtless or criminal conduct of a wilful and +disobedient child. I have been so completely a stranger to London +society the last sixteen years, that my character and conduct depend +more upon you and Caroline to be raised or lowered in the estimation of +my friends and also of the world, than on any of the young people with +whom you may mingle. On which, then, will my Emmeline decide,--to +indulge in these gloomy fancies, and render herself ill both in health +and temper, as well as exposing her mother to censure and suspicion; or +will she, spite of the exertion and pain it may occasion, shake off this +lethargy, recall all her natural animation and cheerfulness, and with +her own bright smile restore gladness to the hearts of her parents?" + +I could not speak in answer to this appeal, dear Mary, but I clung +weeping to mamma's neck. I never till that moment knew all my +responsibility, how much depended on my conduct; but at that moment I +inwardly vowed that never, never should my conduct injure that dear +devoted mother, who endeavoured so fondly to soothe my grief, and check +my bitter tears; who had done so much for me, who had devoted herself so +completely to her children. Mentally I resolved that nothing should be +wanting on my part to render her character as exalted in the eyes of the +world as it was in mine. I could not bear to think how ungratefully I +had acted, and I cried till I made my head and mamma's heart ache; but I +could not long resist her fond caresses, her encouraging words, and +before she left me I could even smile. + +"And what am I to say," she said, with her usual playfulness, "of the +sad complaints that I have received the last few days from Miss +Harcourt, that she does not know what has come to you, from Mons. +Deville and Signer Rozzi? Now what am I to say or do to prove that this +Mademoiselle Emmeline does like Italian, and is not ill, as our polite +professors fancy? must I lecture as I did when she was an idle little +girl, and liked her play better than her studies? Suppose these +gentlemen are asked, which in all probability they certainly are, what +sort of pupils Mrs. Hamilton's daughters are; they ought to be something +out of the way, for we hear she has instructed them principally herself. +What answer will be given, what conclusions drawn, if you do not exert +yourself and prove that you can learn as well, when you like, as your +sister, and even quicker than your cousin?" + +I felt so ashamed, dearest Mary, that I concealed my face on her +shoulder, and would not even look up to promise amendment, for I felt I +was not certain of myself; but when mamma spoke of my letter to you, and +asked me if I still wished to send it, or if I would not write another, +I made a desperate effort, and answered as well as I could-- + +"I will not write again to Mary, dear mamma, till I have conquered all +these silly and sinful feelings, and can write as usual; and to be quite +sure of myself, that I may not break my resolution, I promise you that +for six months I will not give myself the pleasure of addressing her, +and if even at the end of that time you do not think I have sufficiently +recovered my senses, which certainly appear to have deserted me, you +shall increase at your will my time of probation; I deserve some +privation for my ungrateful conduct, and the not writing to Mary now is +the greatest I can think of." I tried to appear very heroic as I made +this speech, but with all my efforts I completely failed. Mamma looked +at me a moment in surprise, but then, with more than usual fondness, she +strained me to her heart, and I felt a tear fall on my cheek. + +"My own sweet child, my darling Emmeline!" she exclaimed, "I did not +expect this offered sacrifice, but I will accept it, my own love, and +let its pain he soothed to your affectionate heart by the knowledge that +in making it, you have given me the purest, most delicious sense of +pleasure you could bestow. We will not say six months," she added, more +playfully, "we will see what the middle or end of January brings. You +will then still have nearly four months to redeem your character. I have +not the slightest doubt that even before that period my Emmeline will be +herself." Oh, Mary, I felt so very happy as she thus spoke, that I +thought I must find it very easy to conquer myself, but I was mistaken, +painfully mistaken; I had encouraged despondency and gloom for so long a +period, that it required every exertion, in the very least, to subdue +it. I had chosen to waste my time, and be inattentive to all the means +of improvement which were offered me, and to command my attention +sufficiently to regain the good opinion of our sage professors was most +disagreeably difficult; but I was no longer afraid, to encounter mamma's +sorrowful or reproving glance, as I had been before, and her fond +encouragement and the marks of approval which both she and papa +bestowed, when I could not but feel I had done little to deserve them, +lightened the labour of my task, and by causing me to wish earnestly to +deserve their kindness, increased my efforts; and at length, dearest +Mary, these miserable feelings so completely departed from me, that I +was surprised to perceive how very nearly I could be as happy in London +as at dear Oakwood; quite as happy is impossible, because I feel more +and more how very much I prefer a quiet domestic life in the country to +London and society. You will perhaps smile as mamma does, and say I am +not introduced yet, and then I may change my mind; but I do not think I +shall. She prefers the country, so it will not be very strange if I +should; but when I see how completely, and yet how cheerfully, she has +given up her favourite residence and employments, for the interests and +happiness of her children, I feel ashamed at the egregious selfishness +which has been mine. Oh, Mary, when shall I ever be like mamma? when can +I ever be worthy of half, nay, one quarter of that respectful admiration +which is bestowed upon her, even by those whose principles and conduct +are directly opposite? + +In her conversations with me she had spoken more of the opinion of the +world than she ever did at Oakwood, and one day venturing to notice it, +as being contrary to that which she so carefully instilled, that to God +and our conscience we should alone be answerable for our conduct, she +answered, with a smile-- + +"I have been long expecting this remark, my dear Emmeline, and I have +endeavoured to be prepared with an answer. To our Father in Heaven and +to our own conscience we must still look for our guide in life; that not +in one thing must we transgress the love and duty we owe our Maker, or +disregard the warning or reproaches of our hearts; but still, mingling +in the world as it is undoubtedly our duty to do--for as I have often +told you, we do not live for ourselves, but for others--we must have due +regard in minor things to the opinions of those with whom we associate. +When a woman has once set up for an Independent, when, scorning the +opinion of the world, she walks forth conscious in her own integrity and +virtue, though no stain may have sullied her conduct or name, though she +may be innately amiable and good, yet every gentler female will shrink +from such a character, and tremble lest they should become like her. +Women are dependent beings; in Infinite Wisdom it was thus ordained, and +why should we endeavour to be otherwise? When once we set up a standard +for ourselves, we have thrown aside our surest safeguard, and exposed +ourselves to censure and suspicion. When the ordinances of society do +not interfere with the higher principle of our lives they should be +obeyed, and in doing so we are following up the dictates of true +religion, by doing our duty as members of a community, as children of +one common father, which, if we stand selfishly apart, we cannot do. I +speak more of the opinion of the world," mamma then continued, "to you +than either to your sister or your cousin. Caroline I would rather check +in her perhaps too great regard for admiration; and Ellen is at present +too young, and in much too delicate health, to go out with me as much as +you will, even before you are what is termed introduced: besides which, +her natural reserve and timidity banish all fears on that account for +her. But for you, Emmeline, I do sometimes feel fearful that, in the +indulgence of uncontrolled feeling, you will forget you are not quite +such an independent being as you were at Oakwood. Many of your ideas are +quite contrary to those generally entertained by several with whom you +may associate; and I sometimes dread that by their unchecked expression, +or the avowed determination never to think as your companions do--that +you hate such confined ideas, or some such thing, which," and she +smiled, "if I know my Emmeline rightly, is not at all unlikely--you may +be exposing yourself to suspicion and dislike. I feel quite sure you +never will wilfully offend, or that you will really deserve such +censure; all I wish is that you will be a little more guarded and +controlled in your intercourse with strangers here, than you ever were +in the happy halls of Oakwood." + +I did not answer, my dear Mary; for I do not know why, but there was +something in her words that caused my eyes to fill with tears. I think +it was because it seemed such a painful task to maintain such a +continued control over my words and feelings, and mamma as usual divined +the cause of my sadness, even before I could define it myself. + +"Do not look so very sad, my sweet girl," she said so fondly, that like +a simpleton I cried the more. "I do not wish to see you changed, however +different you may be to others. I do not wish to chill one feeling in +this affectionate little heart, nor check one burst of enthusiasm. Your +character has been and is too great a source of unalloyed pleasure to +your mother, my Emmeline; it would be misery indeed to see it in any way +changed, though I do preach control so very much," she continued, more +playfully, but with that same fond affection which, while it made me +cry, appeared to soothe every painful emotion. "We shall not always be +in society, Emmeline; come to me as of old, and tell me every thought +and feeling, and all that has given you pain or pleasure. With me, +dearest, there must be no control, no reserve; if there be the least +appearance of either, you will inflict more pain on my heart than from +your infancy you have ever done, for I shall think my own counsels have +alienated from me the confidence of my child." + +I never shall forget the impressive sadness with which she spoke these +words, dearest Mary, and clinging to her, I declared and with truth, as +long as I might speak and think and feel without control when with her, +I would be all, all she wished in society--that I never could be +unhappy,--and to be reserved with her, I felt sure I never, never could. +She embraced me with the utmost tenderness, and banished all my +remaining sadness by the earnest assurance that she believed me. + +What a long letter have I written to you, my dearest friend; will you +not say I have atoned for my long silence? If I have not atoned to you, +I have at least gratified myself; for you know not how very often I +longed, after such conversations as I have recounted, to sit down and +write them all to you, as I had promised, when I could no longer tell in +speech all my kind mother's instructions. + +I do not make any apology for writing so much of her and myself, for I +know to you it is unnecessary. I tried to write all she said, that you +may benefit by it likewise, and in doing so I assure you I give you the +sincerest proof of my affection; for to no one but my own Mary have I +thus related the precious conversations I had alone with mamma. I know +no one but you whom I deem worthy of them. How I wish in return you +could solve a riddle for me. Why do I _fear_ mamma so much, when I love +her so very dearly? When I do or even think anything that my conscience +tells me is wrong, or at least not right, I absolutely tremble when I +meet her eye, though she may know nothing for which to condemn me. I +have never heard her voice in anger, but its sorrowful tones are far +more terrible. I think sometimes, if I had been in Ellen's place +eighteen months ago, I should have been as ill from fear alone, as she +was from a variety of emotions, poor girl. Yet why should I feel thus? +Caroline does not even understand me when I speak of such an emotion. +She says she is always very sorry when she has displeased mamma; but +fear is to her unknown--we two certainly are complete opposites. I think +Ellen's character resembles mine much more than my sister's does. But +you will like to know how my time of probation is thus shortened. For I +should have kept my resolution and waited the six months, pain as it +was, but one day about a week ago, mamma chanced to enter our study at +the very instant that the poor man who so politely believed Mademoiselle +Emmeline was too ill to appreciate his lessons was praising me up to the +skies for my progress; that same day Signor Rozzi had informed mamma, +with all the enthusiasm of his nation, that he was delighted to teach a +young lady who took such pleasure in the study of poetry, and so capable +of appreciating the beauties of the Italian poets. "In truth, madam," he +said, "she should be a poet herself, and the Temple of the Muses graced +with her presence." There's for you, Mary! But jokes apart, I do love +Italian; it is, it must be the natural language of poetry; the +sentiments are so exquisitely lovely, the language, the words, as if +framed to receive them--music dwells in every line. Petrarch, Tasso, +Dante, all are open to me now, and I luxuriate even in the anticipation +of the last,--but how I am digressing. That night mamma followed me to +my room, as I retired to bed, and smiling, almost laughing, at the half +terror of my countenance expressed, for I fancied she had come to +reprove the wild spirits I had indulged in throughout the day, she said, +"Is not this little head half turned with the flattery it has received +to-day?" + +"No," I instantly replied. "It is only the approbation of one or two +that can put me in any danger of such a misfortune." + +"Indeed," she answered, again smiling; "I fancied it was the fine +speeches you had been hearing to-day that had excited such high spirits, +but I am glad it is not; otherwise, I might have hesitated to express +what I came here to do--my approbation of my Emmeline's conduct the last +few months." + +I felt my colour rising to my very temples, dear Mary, for I did not +expect this, but I endeavoured to conceal all I felt by seizing her +hand, and imploring her, in a serio-comic, semi-tragic tone, not to +praise me, for she and papa were the two whose praises would have the +effect on me she feared. + +"But you must endeavour to keep your head steady now," she continued, +"because papa sends a packet to Oakwood next week, and a long letter for +Mary from my Emmeline must accompany it; her patience, I think, must be +very nearly exhausted, and I know if you once begin to write, a frank +will not contain all you will have to say, will it?" she added, with an +arch but such a dear smile. + +All my high spirits seemed for the moment to desert me, and I could not +answer her, except to cover her hand with kisses. I have told you what +she said in the way of reproof and advice, my dear Mary, but I cannot +coolly write all she said as encouragement and praise; it was much more +than I deserved, and all, therefore, that I can do, is to continue my +endeavours to feel one day rather more to merit it. I have risen every +morning an hour earlier, that I might tell you all I wished without +encroaching on my allotted hours of study; for I hope you will not +imagine I have written all this in one or two, or even three sittings; +and now do I not deserve a letter almost as long from you? If you do not +thus reward me, dread my vengeance, and write soon, for I long to have a +letter from you; of you I have heard often--but of and from, though +they may be both brothers of the family of the prepositions, are very +different in meaning. I have not written one word of Caroline or Ellen. +Am I not incurably egotistical? The former declares she is sure you will +have no time to read a letter from her, with such a volume as mine, and +Ellen says she has no time by this opportunity. I told her she ought to +get up as I did, she blushed, looked confused enough to awaken my +attention, and then said she supposed she was too lazy; and now I really +must say farewell. Mind you write all concerning yourself and your dear +mother, to whom present my very loving respects, and as for yourself, +dear Mary, let this long letter prove the sincere affection and perfect +confidence of your giddy friend, + +EMMELINE. + +P.S.--No young lady can write without a post-script. Mamma has +absolutely had the patience to read through my letter, and except that +she said so much of her was certainly needless, she approves of it +almost as much as she disapproved of my other, which she has just +compelled me to read. What a tissue of absurdity it contained,--worse, +it is sinful. I have had the pleasure of burning it, and I hope and +trust all my silly repinings are burnt with it. Once more, adieu. + +E.H. + + +_From Mrs. Hamilton to Miss Greville._ + +I cannot, my dear Mary, suffer Emmeline's long letter to be forwarded to +you without a few lines from me, to remove all lingering fears which you +may perhaps have had, that I do not approve of your correspondence. +Believe me, my dear girl, that to see you the chosen friend of my giddy +but warm-hearted Emmeline is still, as it has ever been from your +childhood, a source of real pleasure both to Mr. Hamilton and myself. +Female friendships are, I know, often regarded with contempt, not only +by men, but frequently by the sterner principles of our own sex; they +are deemed connections of folly; that the long letters which pass +between young ladies set down by the world as intimate friends, are but +relations of all the petty incidents they may hear or see. Such letters +are also considered tending to weaken the mind and produce false +sensibility, by the terms of affection they force into their +service--the magnified expression of momentary and fleeting emotions. +That such may sometimes be the tenor of some young people's +correspondence, I do not pretend to deny, and when that is the case, and +such letters are treasured up in secret and requested to be burnt, lest +any eyes save those for whom they are intended should chance to +encounter them, then, indeed, I too might disapprove of similar +intimacies, and it was to prevent this I would not permit Emmeline to +send the first letter to which she has alluded. Every feeling was +magnified and distorted, till you must have fancied--had not the real +cause been told--that some very serious evil had happened, or was +impending over her. I did not in the least doubt but that you would have +used all your influence to combat with and conquer this sinful repining; +but still I thought your very replies might have called forth renewed +ebullitions of sensibility, and thus in the frame of mind which she was +then indulging, your hinted reproaches, however gentle, might have been +turned and twisted into a decay of friendship or some such display of +sensitiveness, which would certainly have removed your affection and +injured herself. When, therefore, she so frankly acknowledged her error, +and offered to sacrifice the pleasure I knew it was to write to you, I +accepted it, spite of the pain which I saw she felt, and which to +inflict on her, you may believe gave her, and now I certainly feel +rewarded for all the self-denial we both practised, Emmeline is again +the same happy girl she was at Oakwood, although I can perceive there is +nothing, or at best but very little here, that can compensate for the +rural pleasures she has left. I do not wonder at this, for in such +feelings I trace those which, from my girlhood, were my own. I hope, +therefore, my dear young friend, that nothing in future will check your +intercourse with Emmeline, but that your correspondence may long +continue a source of pleasure to both of you. I love to see the perfect +confidence with which Emmeline has written, it proves she regards you as +you deserve to be regarded, as indeed her friend, not her companion in +frivolity and sentiment; and believe me, you may thus have it in your +power to improve and strengthen her perhaps rather too yielding +character. The manner in which, through the mercy of our compassionate +God, you have been enabled, young as you are, to bear your trials, which +are indeed severe, has inspired her with a respect for your character, +which the trifling difference in your ages might otherwise have +prevented, and therefore your letters will be received with more than +ordinary interest, and your good example, my dear girl, may do much +towards teaching her to bear those evils of life from which we cannot +expect her to be exempt, with the same patient resignation that +characterises you. Write to her therefore, as often as you feel +inclined, and do not, I beg, suppress the thoughts her candid letter may +have produced. I will not ask you to read her confession charitably, for +I know you will, and I assure you she has completely redeemed her fault. +The struggle was a very severe one to subdue the depression she had +encouraged so long; but she has nobly conquered, and I do not fear such +feelings of discontent ever again obtaining too great an ascendency. + +Tell your dear mother, with my affectionate love, that she will be +pleased to hear Ellen's health is improving, and has not as yet suffered +in the least from the winter or the more confined air of London, which I +almost dreaded might be baneful to one so delicate as she was when we +left Oakwood. I think our little tour did her much good, though the idea +of the exertion at first appeared painful. She is ever cheerful, though +I sometimes wish she would be more lively, and cannot help fancying, +notwithstanding her melancholy as a child was remarkable, that her +sufferings, both bodily and mental, the last eighteen months have made +her the very pensive character she is. I had hoped before that +unfortunate affair she was becoming as animated and light-hearted as my +Emmeline, but as that cannot be, I endeavoured to be thankful for the +health and quiet, and, I trust, happiness she now enjoys. We receive, +every opportunity, from Edward very satisfactory and pleasing letters, +which, as you will believe, tend not a little to lessen the anxiety of +both his sister and myself. His new captain is a far sterner character +and even more rigid in discipline than was Sir Edward Manly; but our +young sailor writes that this is rather a source of pleasure to him, for +it will be the greater merit to win his regard, which he has resolved to +use every endeavour to maintain. + +I must not forget, in thus writing of my family, to mention that Herbert +never writes home without inquiring after his favourite Mary, and if his +sisters do not answer such queries very particularly, they are sure in +the next letter to obtain as severe a reproach as can flow from his pen. +Will you not return such little tokens of remembrance, my dear girl? +Herbert has only lately changed the term by which in his boyhood he has +so often spoken of you--his sister Mary; and surely friends in such +early childhood may continue so in youth. The season has not, and will +not yet commence here. Caroline is anticipating it with a delight which +I could wish less violent. I certainly never observed the very striking +contrast between my daughters as I do now, though I always knew they +were very unlike. You, dear Mary, would, I think, even more than +Emmeline, shrink from the life which for a few months in every year we +must now lead, if we would do our duty in the station we are ordained to +fill. I think one season will prove to Caroline that it is not in gaiety +she will find true and perfect happiness, and if it do so, I shall join +in society next year with a less trembling heart. And now, adieu, my +dear young friend. If by Emmeline's long silence you have ever permitted +yourself to entertain a suspicion that I did not approve of your +correspondence, let this letter from me prove your error, and remember, +if ever sorrows in your young yet chequered life should assail you, and +you would conceal them from your revered parent, fearing to increase +her griefs, write to me without hesitation, without fear, and I will +answer you to the best of my ability; for sympathy, believe me, you will +never appeal to me in vain, and if you require advice, I will give it +you with all the affection I feel towards you. God bless you, my dear +girl. + +Yours, most affectionately, E. HAMILTON. + + +_From Emmeline Hamilton to Mary Greville._ + +A month, actually a whole month has elapsed, dearest Mary, since I wrote +to you last, and not a line from you. Granting it was nearly a week on +the way, three weeks are surely long enough for you to have written an +answer, when I entreated you to write so soon. What can be the cause of +this silence? I will not upbraid you, because I tremble when I think +what may perhaps have occasioned it. Mamma has become almost as anxious +as myself, therefore, as soon as you can, pray write, if it be but one +line to say you are well and at peace, I do not, will not ask more. I +scarcely like to write on indifferent subjects in this letter, but yet +as you have given me nothing to answer, I must do so to fill up my +paper; for if what I dread be not the case, you will not thank me for an +epistle containing but a dozen lines. London is becoming rather more +agreeable, and the fogs have given place to fine weather. The Court +arrived from Brighton yesterday, and they say the town will now rapidly +fill. Caroline is all joy, because early next month Mr. Grahame's family +leave Brighton. They have a fine house in Piccadilly not very far from +us, and Caroline is anticipating great pleasure in the society of Annie. +I wonder what my sister can find to like so much in Miss Grahame; to me +this friendship has been and is quite incomprehensible. She does not +possess one quality that would attract me; what a fortunate thing it is +we do not all like the same sort of people. Congratulate me, my dear +friend, I am overcoming in a degree my dislike to the company of +strangers. Some of papa and mamma's select friends and their families +have been calling on us the last month, and we have lately had rather +more society in the evening; not anything like large parties, but nice +little conversaziones, and really the lords and ladies who compose them +are much more agreeable than my fancy pictured them. They are so +intelligent, and know so much of the world, and the anecdotes they +relate are so amusing, and some so full of good-natured wit, that in one +evening I become more advanced in my favourite study, that of character, +than I do in weeks spent in retirement. Caroline is very much admired, +and I sometimes look at her with surprise; for she certainly looks much +better, and makes herself more agreeable among strangers than she +_always_ does at home. Mamma would call that perhaps an unkind +reflection, but I do not mean it for such; some people are more +fascinating out than at home. I am contented to remain in the shade, and +only speak when I am spoken to, like a good little girl; that is to say, +I converse with those who are good-natured enough to converse with me, +and many agreeable evenings have I passed in that way. There is her +Grace the Duchess D----, a very delightful woman, with elegant manners, +and full of true kindness. I like the way she speaks to her daughters, +at least her two youngest--the rest are married--Lady Anne and Lady +Lucy; they appear very nice young women, agreeable companions, as yet +we have but little conversation in common, though they appear to get on +remarkably well with Caroline. The Countess Elmore, a _nouvelle mariee_, +but a delightful creature, so exquisitely lovely--such eyes, hair, +teeth; and yet these rare charms appear entirely forgotten, or displayed +only for the Earl her husband, who is worthy of it all. He has talked to +me so often, that his wife also takes a great deal of notice of me, and +when they are of our party I always pass an agreeable evening. The Earl +is well acquainted with our beautiful Devonshire, dearest Mary; he +admires country as I do, and he asked so much about it one night last +week, that I quite forgot all my intentions about control, and actually +talked and apostrophised the Dart as I would to one of my own brothers. +I forgot everybody else in the room, till I caught mamma's glance fixed +earnestly on me, and then, my dear friend, I did not feel over +comfortable, however, I was soon at ease again, for I saw it was only +_warning_, not _reproving_; and the next morning, when I sought her to +tell her all my delight of the preceding evening, she shared in it all, +and when I asked her, half fearfully, if her glance meant I was passing +the boundary she had laid down, she said, "Not with the Earl of Elmore, +my dear Emmeline; but had you been talking in the same animated strain +to the Marquis of Alford, who, I believe, took you into supper, I should +say you had." + +"But I did not with him," I exclaimed. + +"No, my love," she answered, laughing at the anxiety that was, I felt, +imprinted on my face. "But why are you so terrified at the bare +suggestion?" + +"Because," I said, and I felt I blushed, "he is a single man; and I +never can speak with the same freedom to unmarried as to married men." + +"And why not?" she asked, and fixed her most penetrating glance on my +face. + +I became more and more confused, dear Mary, for I felt even to my own +mother it would be difficult to express my feelings on that subject. I +managed, however, with some difficulty, to say that I had often heard +Annie say she hated assemblies where there were only married men, though +there might be some fun in endeavouring to excite the jealousy of their +wives; but it was nothing compared to the triumph of chaining young men +to her side, and by animated conversation and smiles make each believe +himself a special object of attraction, when, in reality, she cared +nothing for either. "Rather than do that," I exclaimed, starting from +the stool which I had occupied at mamma's feet, and with an energy I +could not restrain, "I would bury myself for ever in a desert, and never +look upon a face I loved; rather than play upon the feelings of my +fellow-creatures, I would--I know not what I would not endure. Mother," +I continued, "mother, if ever you see me for one instant forget myself, +and by word or sign approach the borders of what is termed coquetry, +promise me faithfully you will on the instant prevent farther +intercourse, you will not hesitate one moment to tell me of it; even +though in your eyes it may appear but earnest or animated conversation. +Mother, promise me this," I repeated, for I felt carried so far beyond +myself, that when I look back on that conversation, it is with +astonishment at my own temerity. "Annie has laughed at me when I +expressed my indignation; she says it is what every woman of fashion +does, and that I am ridiculous if I hope to be otherwise. Mother, you +will not laugh at me. Spare me, spare me from the remorse that will +ensue, if such ever be my conduct." + +"Fear not, my dear and noble child," she exclaimed (her voice I knew +expressed emotion), and she pressed me fondly to her heart; "I promise +all, all you wish. Retain these noble feelings, these virtuous fears, +and I shall never have occasion to do what you desire. Oh, that your +sister thought the same!" she added; and oh, Mary, I shall never forget +the tone of anxiety and almost distress with which those last words were +said. + +"She does, she will, she must," I said, vehemently, for I would have +given worlds to calm the anxiety I know she feels for Caroline, and I do +wish that on some points my sister thought as I do, not from vanity, my +dear Mary, believe me, but for her own happiness. I cannot describe each +member of our circle, dear Mary, in this letter, but you shall have them +by degrees. The Earl and Countess Elmore are my favourites. I was very +sorry mamma did not permit me to join a very small party at their house +last week; the Countess came herself to beg, but mamma's mandate had +gone forth long ago, and therefore I submitted I hope with a good grace, +but I doubt it. She wishes me only to join in society at home this year, +but next year I may go out with her as often as I please. Lord Henry +D'Este is one of the most amusing creatures I ever met with, he has +always some droll anecdote to relate that calls forth universal +merriment; but of single men, the Earl of St. Eval, eldest son of the +Marquis of Malvern, is the most agreeable. He is not particularly +handsome, but has an eloquent smile and persuading voice, very tall and +noble in his carriage. He has talked to me much of Oxford, where for +about six or seven months he was acquainted with my brothers, of whom he +spoke in such high terms, dear Mary, and quite regretted he could not +enjoy their society longer. He has since been on the Continent, and +relates so delightfully all he has remarked or seen among foreigners, +that it is evident he travelled really for pleasure and information, not +for fashion. He appears much attracted with Caroline. I am sure he +admires her very much, and I only wish she would be as pleased with him +as I am, but she always provokes me by saying he has not sufficient +_esprit_; nor is he quite handsome enough to please her; and yet she +never refuses his attentions or shrinks from his conversation, as, if I +disliked him (as when we are alone she appears to do), I know I should. +Do not tremble for my peace, dear Mary, as you read these flowing +descriptions. In society they are most agreeable, but as the partner of +my life, I have not yet seen one to whom, were the question asked, I +could with any hope of happiness give my hand. These scenes are well for +a time, but they are not those in which I would wish to pass my life. My +wishes are humbler, much humbler; but I do not yet understand them +sufficiently even to define them to myself. It is much the same with the +young ladies of rank with whom I now frequently associate; they are +agreeable companions, but not one, no, not one can supply your place, +dearest Mary. Not one can I love as I do you. We have no ideas in +common; amiable and good as in all probability they are, still, as my +intimate friends I could not regard them; and yet--strange contradiction +you will say--I wish Caroline could find one amongst them to supply the +place of Annie Grahame in her heart. Why am I so prejudiced against her, +you will ask. Mary, I am prejudiced, and I cannot help it. Something +tells me my sister will obtain no good from this intimacy, I never did +like her, and of late this feeling has increased. Ellen is pleased, too, +when her health permits her to join our agreeable little coteries. She +appears overcoming her very great reserve, but does not become more +lively. She looks always to me, as if she felt a stain yet lingers on +her character, and though mamma and papa treat her even more kindly than +they did before, if possible, still there are times when to me she +appears inwardly unhappy. Strangers would only pronounce her more +pensive than usual for her years; for her slight figure and very +delicate features, as well as retiring manner, make her appear even +younger than she is, but I sometimes fancy I read more. She is always +calm and gentle as she used to be, and I never can discover when +anything vexes her, except by her heightened colour, which is more +easily visible now than when her health was better. + +I am summoned away, dear Mary, to go with mamma to ride, and as this +leaves to night, I must not write more now; but I intend teasing you +with letters every week till you write to me, if you are not well, in +the sincere wish to arouse you and draw your thoughts from what may be +unpleasing subjects: and if you are idle, to spur you to your task. +Adieu, my dearest friend. + +Your ever affectionate EMMELINE. + + +_From Mary Greville to Emmeline Hamilton_. + +Greville Manor, March 13. + +How can I thank you sufficiently, my dearest Emmeline, for the +affectionate letters which I have received so regularly the last month. +I am still so weak that much writing is forbidden me, and therefore to +reply to them all as my affection dictates is impossible. But I know +your kind heart, my Emmeline; I know it will be satisfied, when I say +your letters have indeed cheered my couch of suffering; have indeed +succeeded not only in changing _my_ thoughts from the subject that +perhaps too much engrosses them, but sometimes even my poor mother's. +Your first long letter, dated January, you tell me you wrote to let me +know you as you are, that all your faults may be laid bare to my +inspection; and what is to be the consequence--that you are, as you said +you would be, lowered in my estimation? no, dear and candid girl, you +are not, and while you retain such ingenuousness of disposition, you +never can be. Wrong you certainly were to encourage such despondency, +when so very many blessings were around you; but when once you become +sensible of an error, it is already with you corrected. Mamma has, I +know, some weeks ago, written to Mrs. Hamilton, to tell her Greville +Manor is to be sold. We shall never return to it again; the haunts I so +dearly loved, the scenes in which I have spent so many happy hours, all +will pass into the hands of strangers,--it will be no longer our own; we +shall be no longer together, as for so many years we have been. In +changing my residence thus, I feel as if every tie I loved was torn +asunder. + + * * * * * + +I thought I could have written calmly on this subject, my Emmeline, but +I believed myself stronger, both in mind and body, than I am. I have +been very ill, and therefore let that be my excuse. Plead for me with +your mother, Emmeline; tell her she knows not how I struggle to conceal +every pang from the watchful eyes of that mother who has hung over my +couch, with an agony that has told me plainer than words I am indeed her +only joy on earth. My spirit has been so tortured the three months of my +stern father's residence at home, that I feel as if I would--oh! how +gladly--flee away and be at rest: but for her sake, I pray for life, for +strength; for her sake, I make no resistance to the advice of Mr. +Maitland, that for a year or two we should live in Italy or Switzerland, +though in leaving England I feel as if I left I know not what, but +somewhat more than the mere love for my native land. Why, why is my +health so weak? why does it ever suffer when my mind is unhappy? Oh, +Emmeline, you know not the fierce struggle it is not to murmur; to feel +that it is in mercy my Father in Heaven afflicts me thus. If I might but +retain my health, my mother should never suspect my sufferings, I would, +I know I would, hide them from every eye; but she reads them in my +failing frame and pallid features, when I would by every means in my +power prove to her that while she is spared to me, I cannot be wholly +unhappy. It was not illness of body that prevented my replying to your +first long letter; but papa and Alfred were both at home, and my nerves +were so frequently shaken, that I knew it would be impossible to write +and therefore did not attempt it, even at the risk of offending, or at +least giving pain to you. I begged mamma to write to Mrs. Hamilton, and +tell her all that had occurred, on the receipt of your second, dated +February; for I thought while explaining our silence it would relieve +herself, which I think it did. It is six weeks since then and I am only +now allowed to write, and have been already obliged to pause more than +once in my task; so forgive all incoherences, my dearest Emmeline. The +Manor is to be sold in June: for my sake, mamma ventured to implore my +father to dispose of another estate, which has lately become his, +instead of this, but he would not listen to her; and I implored her not +to harrow her feelings by vain supplications again. Alfred is to go to +Cambridge, and this increased expense, as it is for him, papa seems to +think nothing of, but to my poor mother it is only another subject of +uneasiness, not so much for our sakes as for his own. Temptations of +every kind will be around him; his own little income will never be +sufficient to enable him to lead that life which his inclination will +bid him seek. Misfortune on every side appears to darken the future; I +cannot look forward. Pray for me, my dearest friend, that I may be +enabled to trust so implicitly in the Most High that even now my faith +should not for a moment waver. Oh! Emmeline, spite of all his harshness, +his coldness, and evident dislike, my heart yearns to my father. Would +he but permit me, I would love and respect him as fondly as ever child +did a parent, and when, after beholding his cruelty to my mother, my +heart has sometimes almost involuntarily reproached him and risen in +rebellion against him, the remorse which instantly follows adds to that +heavy burden which bows me to the earth. We leave England in May, if I +am sufficiently strong. I do not think we shall visit London, but travel +leisurely along the coast to Dover. I wish I could see you once more, +for I know not if we shall ever meet again, dear Emmeline; but perhaps +it is better not, it would only heighten the pain of separation. I +should like much to have written to your kind good mother with this, but +I fear my strength will not permit, yet perhaps, if she have one +half-hour's leisure, she will write to me again; her letters indeed are +my comfort and support. I thank your brother Herbert for his many kind +and affectionate messages; tell him all you will of our plans, and tell +him--tell him--his sister Mary will never forget the brother of her +childhood--the kind, the sympathising companion of her youth. To Percy, +too, remember me; and say all your own affection would dictate to +Caroline and Ellen. I would have written to the latter, but my weakness +will I know prove my best excuse. Before I quite conclude, let me say +how pleased I am to think that, although you still regret Oakwood, you +can find some pleasures in your present life. The society you describe +must be agreeable. I could scarcely, however, refrain from smiling at +your simplicity, my dear Emmeline, in imagining that all who visited at +your father's house would be as delightful and estimable as those whom +your second letter so eloquently described. Why are we so constantly +commanded to be charitable in our intercourse one with another? Must it +not be because our Great Master knew that we all had failings, some more +than others? if all were as worthy and virtuous as some appear, there +would be no need to practise such a virtue; but it is in a mixed society +it is more frequently called into play. More, would we preserve our own +virtue and piety, we must be charitable. We must look on the weaknesses +of our fellow-creatures with mercy and kindness, or how can we demand it +for ourselves? I am no advocate for seclusion in general, though my own +feelings prefer a quiet life. I think a life of retirement is apt to +render us selfish, and too positive in the wisdom and purity of our own +notions, too prejudiced against the faults of our fellows. Society is a +mirror, where we can see human character reflected in a variety of +shades, and thereby, if our minds be so inclined, we may attain a better +knowledge of ourselves. If, before we condemned others, we looked into +our own hearts, we are likely to become more charitable and more humble +at the same moment, and our own conduct necessarily becomes more +guarded. But with your mother, my Emmeline, and your open +heart--unsophisticated as it may be--you will never go far wrong. Mamma +is looking anxiously at me, as if she feared I am exerting myself too +much. I feel my cheeks are painfully flushed, and therefore I will obey +her gentle hint. Farewell, my Emmeline; may you long be spared the +sorrows that have lately wrung the heart of your attached and constant +friend, + +MARY GREVILLE. + + +_From Mrs. Hamilton to Miss Greville_. + +London, March 20th. + +Your letter to Emmeline, my dear young friend, I have read with feelings +both of pain and pleasure, and willingly, most willingly, do I comply +with your request, that I would write to you, however briefly. Your +despondency is natural, and yet it is with delight I perceive through +its gloom those feelings of faith and duty, which your sense of religion +has made so peculiarly your own. I sympathise, believe me, from my +heart, in those trials which your very delicate health renders you so +little able to bear. I will not endeavour by words of consolation to +alleviate their severity, for I know it would be in vain. In your +earliest youth I endeavoured to impress upon your mind that we are not +commanded to check every natural feeling. We are but told to pour before +God our trouble, to lean on His mercy, to trust in His providence, to +restrain our lips from murmuring, and if we do so, though our tears may +fall, and our heart feel breaking, yet our prayers will be heard and +accepted on high. It is not with you, my poor girl, the weak indulgence +of sorrow that ever prostrates you on a couch of suffering, it is the +struggle of resignation and concealment that is too fierce for the +delicacy of your constitution; and do you not think that strife is +marked by Him, who, as a father, pitieth His children? Painful as it is +to you, my dear Mary, your sufferings may be in a degree a source of +mercy to your mother. Agonizing as it is to the heart of a parent, to +watch the fevered couch of a beloved child, yet had she not that +anxiety, the conduct of your father and brother might present still +deeper wretchedness. For your sake, she dismisses the harrowing thoughts +that would otherwise be her own; for your sake, she rallies her own +energies, which else might desert her; and when you are restored to her, +when, in those intervals of peace which are sometimes your own, she sees +you in health, and feels your constant devotion, believe me, there is a +well of comfort, of blessed comfort in her fond heart, of which nothing +can deprive her. For her sake, then, my dearest Mary, try to conquer +this reluctance to leave England. I do not reproach your grief, for I +know that it is natural. But endeavour to think that this residence for +a few years on the Continent, may restore your mother to a degree of +peace, which, in England, at present she cannot know; and will not this +thought, my love, reconcile you to a short separation from the land of +your birth, and the friends you so dearly love? We shall all think of +and love our Mary, however widely parted. We will write very frequently, +and every information I can obtain of your brother shall be faithfully +recorded. Mr. Hamilton has ever felt for your mother as a brother would, +and for her sake, her misguided son will be ever an object of his +dearest care. Do not fear for him, and endeavour to soothe your mother's +anxiety on that head also. Herbert has written to you, I enclose his +letter; and he entreats most earnestly that you will not only permit him +to continue to write, but answer him, during your residence abroad. He +has been deeply grieved at the intelligence we have reported of you, and +I hope and think, if your mother do not disapprove of your +correspondence, that the humble yet fervent faith which breathes in the +religion of my son may long prove a source of consolation as well as +interest to you, who, from your childhood, could sympathise with all his +exalted feelings. Poor Emmeline has shed many bitter tears over your +letter; she cannot bear to think of your leaving England, but yet agrees +with me in believing it will be a beneficial change for both yourself +and Mrs. Greville, but her letter shall speak her own feelings. I will +not write more now, but will very soon again. Do not exert yourself too +much to answer either Emmeline or myself; we will not wait for regular +replies. I have written to your mother also, therefore this brief +epistle is entirely for yourself, as you wished it. Mr. Hamilton will +meet you at Dover, which will afford me much satisfaction, as I shall +know more than I could ever learn by a letter, and he will, I trust, be +enabled to set your mother's heart at rest on some points which must be +now subjects of anxiety. God bless you, my Mary, and restore you +speedily to health and peace. + +Yours, with the warmest affection, + +E. HAMILTON. + + + + +CHAPTER II. + + +An early April sun was shining brightly through one of the windows of an +elegantly furnished boudoir of a distinguished-looking mansion, in the +vicinity of Piccadilly. There was somewhat in the aspect of the room, in +the variety of toys scattered on every side, in the selection of the +newest novels which were arranged on the table, and an indescribable air +which pervaded the whole, that might have aroused a suspicion, in any +keen observer who could discover character by trifles, that the lady to +whom that apartment belonged possessed not the very strongest or most +sensible mind. A taste which frivolous trifles could alone gratify +appeared evident; and the countenance of the lady, who was reclining +listlessly on the couch, would have confirmed these surmises. She did +not look above forty, if as much, but her features told a tale of +lassitude and weariness, at variance with the prime of life, which was +then her own. No intellect, no emotion was expressed on her countenance; +it never varied, except, perhaps, to denote peevishness or sullenness +when domestic affairs annoyed her, which appeared to be the case at +present. A volume of the last new novel was in her hand, in which she +appeared sufficiently interested as to feel still more annoyed at the +interruption she was constantly receiving from a young lady, who was +also an inmate of her room. + +Striking, indeed, was the contrast exhibited in the features of the +mother and daughter, for so nearly were they connected, and yet to some +the inanimate expression of the former would have been far preferable to +the handsome but scornful countenance of the latter. She could not have +been more than eighteen, but the expression of the features and the tone +of character were already decided to no ordinary degree. There was an +air of fashion in her every movement; an easy assurance and independence +of spirit which might have made her mother respected, but which in one +so young were intolerable to all save those whom she had contrived to +make her devoted admirers. Spite of the natural beauty of her face, +haughtiness, pride, and some of the baser passions of human nature, were +there visibly impressed; at least whenever she appeared in her natural +character, when no concealed designs caused her to veil these less +amiable emotions in eloquent smiles and a manner whose fascination was +felt and unresisted, even by those who perhaps had been before +prejudiced against her. Various were the characters she assumed in +society--assumed to suit her own purpose, made up of art; even at home +she sometimes found herself seeking for design, as if it were impossible +to go straightforward, to act without some reason. We shall find, +however, as we proceed, that she had one confidant at home, to whom, +when exhausted by the fatigue of planning, she would confess herself, +and who was generally the hearer and abettor of the young lady's +schemes. This was a person who had lived for many years in the family as +governess; although that office with the elder of her charges had ever +been but nominal, and with the younger it was neglected for the office +of friend and confidant, which Miss Malison very much preferred. + +It was evident this morning that the efforts of the young lady had not +succeeded quite so well as usual in veiling the discontent in which she +inwardly indulged. She was amusing herself at that moment in opening +every book on the table, glancing sulkily on their contents, and then +throwing them down again with a violence that not only had the effect of +making her mother start, but of disturbing the quiet repose of some of +the fragile toys in their vicinity, to the manifest danger of their +destruction. + +"I wish you would oblige me, Annie, by endeavouring to amuse yourself in +a quieter manner," observed her mother, in a very languid tone. "You +have no pity on my poor nerves. You know when I have these nervous +headaches, the least thing disturbs me." + +"You may be certain, mamma, it is reading that makes them worse, not my +noise. You had much better put away the book, and then you have some +chance of being free from them." + +"Will you read to me then instead? I assure you I should much prefer +it." + +"_I_ read aloud! I could not do it to please the most agreeable person +in the world; and as you are so very obliging to me in refusing so +decidedly to go with me to-night, you cannot expect I should oblige +you." + +Lady Helen Grahame's placid countenance gave no evidence of inward +disturbance at this undutiful speech; she was too much used to it, to +feel the pain it might otherwise have produced, and too indifferent to +be either indignant or displeased. + +"You are very ungrateful, Annie," she replied, in that same languid +tone, but with the very little expression in her voice, no emotion was +visible. "I tell you I will send round to Lady Charlton or the Countess +St. Aubyn; either of them, I know, will be very happy to chaperon you. +Surely you can let me be quiet for one evening." + +"Lady Charlton I cannot bear; she is the most detestable creature I +know. I would rather be buried alive in the country, than join in London +society under her care; with her long speeches of prudery and virtue, +and the modest reserve of young ladies, and a hundred other such +saint-like terms, when all the time she is doing all she can to catch +husbands for her three great gawky daughters, who in mamma's presence +are all simplicity and simper--sweet girls just introduced; when I am +very much mistaken if the youngest is not nearer thirty than twenty. And +as for Lady St. Aubyn, you know very well, mamma, papa declared I should +never go out with her again; it is just the same as if I were alone. She +has not a word or thought for any one but herself: she thinks she may +act with as much coquetry now as before she married. I do believe that +woman only married that she might be more at liberty and go out by +herself." + +"Then, if you like neither of them, write a note to Mrs. Hamilton. Your +father would be better pleased if you were to go under her care, than of +any other." + +"Mrs. Hamilton! I would not for worlds. Every pleasure I might +otherwise enjoy would vanish before the stern majesty of her presence. I +wonder how Caroline can bear the thraldom in which her mother holds +her--it is complete slavery." + +"I will not hear a word against Mrs. Hamilton," exclaimed Lady Helen, +with more display of feeling than had yet been perceivable. "She is a +truer friend both to your father and myself than any of those with whom +we associate here." + +"It is well you think so, my lady mother," replied Miss Grahame, in a +peculiar tone. "It is fortunate you are not troubled with jealousy, and +that this paragon of perfection, this Mrs. Hamilton, is your friend as +well as papa's. If I heard my husband so constantly extolling another +woman in my presence, I should not be quite so easy." + +If a flush rose to Lady Helen's pale cheek at these words, it was so +faint as scarcely to be perceivable, and she took no notice, except to +say-- + +"If your great desire to go to this ball is to be with Caroline the +first night of her _entree_, I should think Mrs. Hamilton was the best +chaperon you could have." + +"I tell you, mother, I will not go with her. She has not bewitched me as +she has you and papa. If you would only be quiet for a few hours, I am +sure your head would be sufficiently well for you to go with me; and you +know I never do enjoy an evening so much as when you accompany me, dear +mamma," she continued, softening the violence with which she had at +first spoken into one of the most persuasive eloquence; and humbling her +pride and controlling the contempt with which she ever looked on her +weak but far more principled mother, she knelt on a low stool by her +side, and caressingly kissed Lady Helen's hand. + +"Dear mamma, you would oblige me, I am sure you would, if you knew how +much your presence contributes to my enjoyment. A ball is quite a +different thing when I feel I am under your wing, and you know papa +prefers my going out with you to any one else." + +Annie spoke truth, though her words appeared but flattery. The extreme +indolence of Lady Helen's natural disposition, which was now heightened +by the lassitude attendant on really failing health, rendered her merely +a chaperon in name. Annie felt very much more at liberty when with her +than with any other; she could act as she pleased, select her own +companions, coquette, talk, dance, without ever thinking of her mother +or being sought for by her, till the end of the evening. It was enough +she was with Lady Helen, to silence all gossiping tongues and to satisfy +her father, who, one of the most devoted members of the Lower House, +scarcely ever visited such places of amusement, and therefore knew not +the conduct of either his wife or daughter. He long since discovered his +authority was as nothing to his children; he felt most painfully his +sternness had alienated their affections, and he now rather shrunk from +their society; therefore, even at home he was a solitary man, and yet +Grahame was formed for all the best emotions, the warmest affections of +our nature. He was ignorant that his wife now very frequently suffered +from ill-health, for he had never seen her conduct different even when +in youth and perfectly well. Had he known this, and also the fact that, +though trembling at his sternness, she yet longed to receive some token +of his affection--that she really loved him, spite of the many faults +and the extreme weakness of her character, he might have been happy. + +Deceived by her daughter's manner, Lady Helen began to waver in the +positive refusal she had given to accompanying her, and Annie was not +slow in discovering her advantage; she continued the persuasions she +knew so well how to use, concealing the inward struggle it was to veil +her discontent at this unwonted humiliation, and suppressing the +violence that was ready to break forth, at length succeeded. Though +really feeling too languid for the exertion, the wavering mother could +not resist the unusually gentle manner of the persevering daughter, and +Miss Grahame flew to her confidant to impart the joyful tidings. + +Miss Malison was employed in endeavouring, by commands, exhortations, +and threats, to compel her pupil to practise a difficult sonata, which +her music-master had desired might be prepared by the time of his next +visit. Now it happened that Lilla Grahame had not the slightest taste +for music, and that Miss Malison did not possess the patient +perseverance requisite to smooth the difficulty of the task, nor the +gentleness necessary to render it more pleasing to her pupil; therefore, +in these practising lessons discord ever prevailed over harmony, and the +teacher was ever ready to seize the most trifling excuse to neglect her +office, and leave Lilla to practise or not as she pleased. + +"Malison, _chere_ Malison," exclaimed Annie, in a tone of glee, as she +entered, "do leave that stupid girl and come with me; I have some +charming intelligence to communicate. And it really is no use boring +yourself with Lilla; she will never play, try as hard as she can." + +"According to you, I shall do nothing," burst angrily from her sister's +lips, for her temper, naturally good, though somewhat hasty, had been +completely ruined by careless and mistaken treatment. "If I had been +properly taught, I should have done as others do: if Miss Malison had +chosen to take the same pains with me as Miss Harcourt does with +Emmeline and Ellen, I should have been a very different girl." + +"Insolent, ungrateful girl! do you dare to say I have neglected my +duty?" exclaimed the _gouvernante_, enraged beyond bounds at this +display of insubordination in one whose spirit she had left no means +untried to bend to her will, and forgetting herself in the passion of +the moment, enforced her words by what is termed a sound box on the ear. + +"Now go and tell mamma, pretty dear; or papa, if you like it better," +Miss Grahame said, in a whining tone. + +But Lilla answered her not. A crimson flush for the moment spread over +her very temples at the infliction of this indignity, which very quickly +gave way to a deadly, almost livid paleness, on which the marks of Miss +Malison's ready fingers were the only spots of red. Without a word in +reply, she hastily rose from the piano and left the room. + +"Will she _blab_?" was the elegant question that was asked as the door +closed. + +"Not she," replied Annie, laughing. "She dare not tell papa, and she +knows it is of no use appealing to mamma, who implicitly believes all +you tell her of Miss Lilla's excessive obstinacy, idleness, and +passionate temper in which she so constantly indulges; your deep regrets +that either of Lady Helen Grahame's daughters should be such a character +have succeeded so admirably. I have had such a struggle to obtain +mamma's promise to go with me to-night, that I really feel exhausted," +and the young lady threw herself in a most graceful attitude of +listlessness on a sofa that stood invitingly beside lier. + +"But have you succeeded?" + +"Admirably! at length mamma thinks I am most amiable. My persuasions +were so eloquent, that the most obdurate person could not have resisted +them. I tried violence and sulkiness at first, thinking to frighten or +worry her into compliance; but finding both fail, I was compelled to +have recourse to humiliation and persuasion. If it had continued much +longer, I should have choked by the way; it is quite a relief to breathe +freely again. What do you think of her wishing me to go under the care +of Mrs. Hamilton to-night? I really could hardly control my horror at +the idea." + +"Horrible, indeed! What would have become of all your plans, if you +had?" + +"My dear creature, I would not have gone with her for worlds; but, +however, I think my plans are in too good training for one night spent +under her eyes to injure them. Caroline is beginning, I think, to feel +somewhat like a slave under this keen _surveillance_ of her paragon +mother, and to pine for the freedom of thought and act which I so +unboundedly enjoy. She only wants a little of my good advice and better +example, to become really a girl of spirit." + +"But take care the spirit you are calling forth does not turn against +you," observed Miss Malison. + +"Not at all likely, _ma chere_. I am careful only to excite it to serve +my own purposes. She likes me, I believe, and I can make her what I +please. Let her confidence in her mother be once destroyed, you will see +if she does not act as foolishly as I can desire. She has been buried in +the country so long, she is a mere infant with regard to all that +concerns a life of fashion; and, therefore, will be gladly led by one +she considers so completely _au fait_ at its mysteries as myself. I used +to like her in the country, because she always listened so eagerly to +all I said about London. I saw she envied me even when we were children, +and therefore fancied myself a most important personage." + +"And do you like her now?" + +"You are laughing at me, _chere_ Malison. You know I cannot bear a +rival, and this girl's dazzling beauty will completely cast me in the +shade." + +"You don't mean to say her beauty can be compared to yours?" interrupted +Miss Malison. + +"Perhaps not in the sterling worth of the two," replied Annie, glancing +complacently on a large mirror; "but she is new, Malison--quite new. Her +mother only kept her so long away that she might shine with greater +brilliancy when introduced. As for Caroline, I like her, as far as she +assists my plans, and by her silly, or, if that would serve me better, +criminal conduct, takes somewhat away from her mother's perfection, and +by the pain Mrs. Hamilton will feel, gratify my overpowering +detestation. Malison, you look delighted. Your assistance I am sure of, +if I require it; for you dislike this paragon of her sex almost as much +as I do." + +"Indeed I do. I have never forgotten nor forgiven her presumption a year +or two ago, in hinting so broadly I was mistaken in my treatment of +Lilla, and that gentleness would have much better effect; gentleness +indeed, with a girl that would tire the patience of a saint. She is +always worse after having been with this Mrs. Hamilton, and I suppose it +will be all over again now. I wish, with your charming plans, my dear +Miss Grahame, you would find one to prevent all intercourse between the +Hamiltons and your sister." + +"At present, _ma chere_, such a thing is out of my power, but we will +not despair; although the more you would say about Miss Lilla being +undeserving of such indulgence, the more papa would answer, let her go +and she will learn to be better there. I heard him give mamma peremptory +orders the other day, when we prevented her going, never to refuse +whenever Mrs. Hamilton invited her. Severity is a most admirable method, +my good Malison; you will break her spirit if you persevere, +notwithstanding all the amiable Mrs. Hamilton may do or say." + +"I wish I may; but you have not told me all yet. How proceed your +schemes with Lord Alphingham?" + +"To perfection! I have given Caroline a distaste for every other kind of +person. She has met him, you know, once or twice here, and that was +sufficient to fascinate her. She thinks him the handsomest and most +delightful man she ever knew. It is enough for Mr. Hamilton to see him a +friend of papa's to be attracted towards him; in all probability he will +be introduced at his house, and then my scheme will be still easier. It +will not be difficult to talk Caroline into fancying herself desperately +in love with him, and he with her--he is already attracted; and when I +see the aspect of affairs favourable, I will just get some kind friend +to whisper into Mrs. Hamilton's ear some of the pretty tales I have +heard of this Viscount, and you will see what will follow. These _on +dits_ are, fortunately for my plans, only known among my coterie. With +us, they only render Lord Alphingham more interesting; but with Mrs. +Hamilton they would have the effect of banishing him for ever from her +presence and from the notice of her daughter; the catastrophe, my dear +creature, shall be the perfection of diplomacy, but of that hereafter. I +owe Lord Alphingham a spite, which I will pay off one day, for his +desertion of me the moment Caroline appeared. I may do all I wish with, +one word. All my present intention is, by a gradual yet sure process, to +undermine Caroline's confidence in her mother, and make me her confidant +instead, and if I do that, the rest is easy." + +"You know you have never failed in any scheme, therefore you may feel +secure in this," replied Miss Malison, with ready flattery; for she knew +Miss Grahame's love of designing, and really felt gratified at any plan +tending to injure Mrs. Hamilton, whom she detested with all the +malevolence of a mean and grovelling mind, which despised the virtue +that was too exalted for its comprehension. + +Some little time longer this amiable pair conversed, but their further +conversation it is needless to record. We have already seen that +Emmeline Hamilton's prejudice against Annie Grahame was not unfounded, +and that at present is enough. Before, however, we quit Lady Helen's +mansion, we may say a few words on the character of Lilla, in whom, it +may be recollected, Mrs. Hamilton had ever felt interest sufficient to +indulge a hope that she might render her one day a greater comfort to +her father than either of his other children. As a child, her temper was +naturally good, though somewhat hasty and self-willed; high-spirited, +but affectionate to a degree that would have made the task of training +and instruction easy to any one who possessed sufficient gentleness to +win her affection, and with patience, yet firmness, to guide her in the +right way. Unfortunately, Miss Malison possessed neither; extremely +passionate herself, where her interests did not interfere to control it, +she was not at all the person to guide a passionate child. Severity was +her weapon, and every means used to break the spirit, which she could +plainly perceive would soon endeavour to throw off her control. Lilla +revolted at this treatment, and many evil qualities were thus introduced +in her disposition, which, when they fell under her eye, Mrs. Hamilton +was convinced were completely the fruits of mistaken management. From +being merely hasty, her passionate anger and hatred of her governess had +now increased to such height, as to be really alarming not only to her +weak-minded mother, but to Mrs. Hamilton, who, however, was certainly +never aware of their extent; for before her Lilla was generally gentle +and controlled. Something always occurred to call forth these bursts of +passion in Lady Helen's presence, and consequently, the actual conduct +of Lilla confirmed the statement of Miss Malison, as to her violence and +other evil qualities. Mr. Grahame, too, was compelled to believe all +that was told him, and his sternness towards his unhappy child +frequently caused her to fly from his presence in dread; although her +warm heart yearned towards him with such deep affection, which could he +have guessed one-half of its extent, would have twined her fondly round +his heart, and forced him to examine more strictly than he did the +conduct of Miss Malison. Lilla's dislike to her more favoured sister was +almost as violent as that she bore to her governess; and the conviction +that all her mother's family looked on her as a passionate, evil-minded +girl, of course, increased every bitter feeling. Often, very often, did +Mrs. Hamilton long to implore Mr. Grahame to dismiss Miss Malison, and +place Lilla under the care of some lady more fitted for the task; but +she felt that such advice might be looked upon with some justice by Lady +Helen's friends as most unwarrantable interference. Miss Malison had +been most highly recommended to Lady Helen by her mother, the Duchess of +----, and as, in the opinion of that branch of the family, Annie +abundantly displayed the good effects of her management, it was very +naturally supposed that Lilla's opposite character proceeded from an +innate evil disposition, and not from any fault in her governess. She +was now nearly fourteen and each year Mrs. Hamilton's hopes for the +future worth of her character became fainter; yet still she determined +to do all in her power to counteract Miss Malison's plans, and subdue +Lilla's fearful passions, and those longings for revenge, not only on +her governess but her sister, which, by many little things, she could +perceive were lurking round her heart. Montrose Grahame had been, as we +already know, from his earliest youth the intimate friend of Mr. +Hamilton, and, notwithstanding the increasing cares of their respective +families, this friendship had continued and, if possible, increased, and +Mrs. Hamilton sharing the sentiments of her husband, the qualities of +Grahame speedily caused him to become her friend likewise. She had ever +seen with regret his sternness to his children, she saw also that he was +pained, deeply pained, as their characters became more matured; and, +spite of the difficulties of the task, her benevolent mind determined to +leave no means untried to make one child at least his comfort. Lilla's +affection for her was as violent as her other feelings, and on that she +resolved at first to work. It was strange too, how devotedly attached +this wild and headstrong girl became, to one, who of all others appeared +least suited to her, and that one the mild and pensive Ellen. It +appeared as if it were a relief to meet one so widely different to +herself, and therefore she loved her. The high spirits and animation of +Emmeline appeared less congenial to her affections than the gentle +sweetness of Ellen. Caroline was Annie's friend, and that was enough for +her; not even her being Mrs. Hamilton's daughter could make her an +object of interest. On the day we have mentioned, Lilla had sat for +above an hour in her room; indignation at the insult she had received +swelling in every vein, and longing with sickening intensity for some +means to free herself from such galling thraldom. She did not give vent +to her injured feelings in tears, but her countenance so clearly +expressed the emotions of her heart, that it actually startled a servant +who entered with a message--a request from Mrs. Hamilton, that her young +friend would spend that evening with her daughter and niece. Lilla +started up with a wild exclamation of delight, and the anticipation of +the evening hours enabled her to obey with haughty calmness the summons +of Miss Malison. Before, however, she departed on her visit, a fresh +ebullition had taken place between the sisters in the presence of their +mother, to the great terror of Lady Helen, whose irritation at Lilla's +violence increased, as she could perceive nothing in Annie's words or +manner to call for it. Had she been less indolent, she might easily have +discovered that her elder daughter never permitted a single opportunity +to escape without eliciting Lilla's irritability. As it was, she coldly +rejected the offered caresses the really affectionate girl would have +lavished on her, as she wished her good night, and therefore it was with +a heart bursting with many mingled emotions she sought the happy home of +her beloved friends. + +There gladly will we follow her, for the scenes of violence and evil +passion we have slightly touched on are not subjects on which we love to +linger. + + + + +CHAPTER III. + + +There was thought, deep thought, engraved on Mrs. Hamilton's expressive +countenance, as she sat beside a small table, her head leaning on her +hand, anxious, perhaps even painful, visions occupying her reflective +mind. The evening was gradually darkening into twilight, but still she +did not move, nor was it till a well-known tap sounded at the door, and +her husband stood before her, that she looked up. + +"Will you not let your husband share these anxious thoughts, my +Emmeline?" he said, as he gazed earnestly on her face. + +"My husband may perhaps think them silly and unfounded fancies," she +replied, with a faint smile. + +"He is so prone to do so," answered Mr. Hamilton, in an accent of +playful reproach; "but if you will not tell me, I must guess them--you +are thinking of our Caroline?" + +"Arthur, I am," she said, with almost startling earnestness; "oh, you +cannot tell how anxiously! I know not whether I am right to expose her +to the temptations of the world; I know her disposition, I see the evils +that may accrue from it, and yet, even as if I thought not of their +existence, I expose her to them. Oh, my husband, can this be right? can +I be doing a parent's duty?" + +"We should not, my beloved, be fulfilling the duties of our station, did +we not sometimes mingle in society: all our duty is not comprised in +domestic life. It is when we retain our integrity unsullied, our +restraining principles unchanged in the midst of temptations, that we +show forth, even to the thoughtless, the spirit that actuates us, and by +example may do good. Besides, remember, dearest, we are not about to +enter into continued and incessant dissipation, which occupies the +existence of so many; we have drawn a line, and Caroline loves her +parents too well to expect or wish to pass its boundary. Remember, too, +the anxious fears which were yours when Percy was about to enter into +scenes of even stronger temptation than those which will surround his +sister; and have they had foundation? Has not the influence of his +mother followed him there, and restrained him even at the moment of +trial, and will not the influence of that mother do the same for +Caroline?" + +"Percy is, indeed, all my heart could wish," replied Mrs. Hamilton, +still somewhat sadly; "but his disposition is different to that of +Caroline's. I know his confidence in me is such, and his affection so +strong, that for my sake he would do more than those who but slightly +know him would imagine. When a son really loves his mother, it is a +different, perhaps a more fervid, feeling than that ever known by a +daughter. He feels bound to protect, to cherish, and that very knowledge +of power heightens his affections." + +"You do not doubt your daughters' love, my Emmeline? must I accuse you +of injustice too?" + +"No, dearest Arthur, I do not doubt their love; for my Emmeline I do not +tremble. Her confidence I shall never lose; her affections, however I +may be called upon to exert my authority, will never waver, and +completely opposite as are the feelings with which she and Percy regard +me, their love may be equally intense. But forgive me, my dear husband, +I may be unjust, and if I am may my child forgive me; I am not--oh, that +I were--equally confident in my Caroline. She loves me, but that +affection, I know, does not prevent her thinking me harsh and unkind, if +my wishes interfere with hers. My authority is not the same with her as +it is to her sister and cousin. She seeks another confidential friend +besides her mother, for she dreads my opinions differing from hers. I +have marked her thus in early childhood, and it still exists, though her +temper is more controlled, her disposition, more improved. The last few +years she has been thrown almost entirely with me, and not much above a +twelvemonth since she shrunk from the idea of confiding in any one as +she did in me." + +"And while that confidence exists, my Emmeline, you surely have no +right to fear." + +"But it is waning, Arthur. The last month I know, I feel it is +decreasing. She is no longer the same open-hearted girl with me as she +was so lately at Oakwood. She is withdrawing her confidence from her +mother, to bestow it on one whom I feel assured is unworthy of it." + +"Nay, Emmeline, your anxiety must be blinding you; you are too anxious." + +His wife answered him not in words, but she raised her expressive eyes +to his face, and he saw they were filled with tears. + +"Nay, nay, my beloved!" he exclaimed, as he folded her to his bosom, +struck with sudden self-reproach. "Have my unkind words called forth +these tears? forgive me, my best love; I think I love my children, but I +know not half the depths of a mother's tenderness, my Emmeline, nor that +clear-sightedness which calls for disquietude so much sooner in her +gentle heart than in a father's. But can we in no way prevent the growth +of that intimacy of which I know you disapprove?" + +"No, my dearest Arthur, it must now take its course. Pain as it is to +me, I will not rudely check my child's affections, _that_ will not bring +them back to me. She may, one day, discover her error, and will then +gladly return to that love, that tenderness, of which she now thinks but +lightly. I must endeavour to wait till that day comes, with all the +patience I can teach my heart to feel," she added, with a smile. +"Perhaps I am demanding more than is my due. It is not often we find +young girls willing to be contented with their mother only as a friend; +they pine for novelty, for companions of their own age, whom they +imagine can sympathise better in their feelings. A child is all in all +to a mother, though a parent is but one link in the life of a child; yet +my children have so long looked on me as a friend, that, perhaps, I feel +this loss of confidence the more painfully." + +"But you will regain it, my Emmeline; our Caroline is only dazzled now, +she will soon discover the hollowness of Annie's professions of +everlasting friendship." + +Mrs. Hamilton shook her head. + +"I doubt it, my dear husband. The flattering warmth with which Annie +first met Caroline has disappointed me. I thought and hoped that here, +surrounded by all her fashionable acquaintances, she would rather have +neglected her former friends, and Caroline's pride taking umbrage, their +intimacy would have been at once dissolved. Instead of this, Annie never +fails to treat her with the most marked distinction, evidently appearing +to prefer her much above her other friends; and, therefore, as in this +instance Caroline has found my warnings and suspicions needless and +unjust, she is not likely to permit my opinion of Annie to gain much +ascendancy." + +"But deceived as we have been in this instance, my dear Emmeline, may we +not be so in other points of Annie's character? She is evidently devoted +to fashion and fashionable pleasures, but still there may be some good +qualities lurking round her heart, which her intimacy with Caroline may +bring forward." + +"I hope it may be so," replied Mrs. Hamilton, fervently, though somewhat +doubtingly. "For her father's sake, as well as that of my child's, I +wish her disposition may be different to that which I, perhaps +uncharitably, believe it. You must give me a portion of your sanguine +and trusting hopes, my dearest Arthur," she continued, fondly laying her +hand in his. + +Mr. Hamilton returned a playful answer, and endeavoured to turn the +thoughts of his wife to other and more pleasurable subjects. Anxiety +such as hers could not be entirely dispelled, but it was lessened, for +she had imparted it to her husband, and his watchful care would combine +with her own to guard their child. + +Very different were Caroline's feelings on this important night. Mrs. +Hamilton's fears and Annie's hopes were both well founded. We have known +the character of Caroline from a child; and though the last three or +four years it had so improved, that at Oakwood, Mrs. Hamilton had +ventured to banish fear, and indulge in every pleasing hope, yet there +was a degree of pride still remaining, that revolted very frequently +from the counsels even of her mother; that high and independent spirit +sometimes in secret longed to throw off the very slight restraint in +which she felt held at home. She could not bear to feel that she was in +any way controlled; she longed for the exercise of power, and by the +display of that beauty, those qualities, she knew she possessed, force +herself to be acknowledged as a girl of far more consequence than she +appeared to be when in the quiet halls of Oakwood. There nothing ever +occurred to call these feelings forth, but they were only dormant, and +in London they obtained much greater sway. She felt more controlled than +ever by her mother. Secretly she pined to free herself from that which +she magnified into thraldom, but which was but the watchful tenderness +of a devoted parent; and when the representations, sympathy, and +persuasions of Annie were listened to, no wonder these feelings +increased. Cautiously Miss Grahame had worked: she continually spoke of +the freedom she enjoyed; she introduced her friend to some young ladies +who were continually speaking of the delights of independence both in +act and word. Once introduced, they said they were emancipated from the +labour of the schoolroom, they could employ themselves as they liked, go +out when they pleased, and their mothers never interfered with their +amusements, except to see that they were becomingly dressed, chaperon +them to balls, and second all their efforts at fascination. + +The restraint which, when compared with these, Caroline could not but +feel was hers at home, of course became more and more intolerable. In +confidence, she imparted to Annie her discontent. For the first time she +confided in another, feelings she shrunk from imparting to her mother, +and once such a confidential intimacy commenced, she neither could nor +would draw back. Annie artfully appeared to soothe, while in reality she +heightened the discontent and even indignation of her friend. Yes; +Caroline by slow degrees became even indignant at the conduct of that +mother whose every thought, whose most fervent prayer was for the +happiness of her children; and she looked to this night as the beginning +of a new era, when she allowed herself to hope, with the assistance of +Annie, she would gradually escape from control, and act as other girls +of spirit did. + +There was another subject on which, by the advice of Annie, Caroline +carefully refrained from speaking at home, and that was Lord Alphingham, +a handsome and elegant viscount, who it may be remembered had been +mentioned in Annie's conversation with Miss Malison; and yet it would +appear strange that such was Miss Grahame's counsel, when Mr. Hamilton +frequently spoke of the viscount with every mark of approbation due to +his public conduct; of his private little was known, and still less +inquired. He was famous in the Upper House--an animated and eloquent +speaker--seconding and aiding with powerful influence all Grahame's +endeavours in the Lower House, and rendering himself to the latter a +most able and influential friend. His brilliant qualities, both as a +member of parliament and of polite society, rendered him universally +courted; yet notwithstanding this, Mr. Hamilton had never invited him to +his house. + +"His public character, as far at least as it meets our eye, is +unquestionably worthy of admiration," he had said one day to his wife, +"but I know nothing more; of his private character and conduct I am and +must remain ignorant, and therefore I will not expose my children to the +fascination of his society in the intimacy of home." + +Mrs. Hamilton had agreed with him, but it required not the "intimacy of +home" to give Annie an opportunity of persuading Caroline towards +secretly accepting his attentions, and making an impression in his +favour on her heart; and the latter looked to her _entree_ with the more +pleasure, as she hoped, and with some justice, it would give her many +more opportunities of meeting him than she now enjoyed. She saw before +her, in imagination, a long train of captives whom she would enslave, +still Lord Alphingham in all stood pre-eminent; and visions of varied +nature, but all equally brilliant, floated before her eyes, as she +prepared for the grand ball which, for the first time in her life, she +was about to join. + +The business of the toilette was completed, and we might forgive the +proud smile of exultation which curled round her lip, as she gazed on +the large pier glass which reflected her whole figure. The graceful +folds of the rich white silk that formed her robe suited well with the +tall and commanding form they encircled. The radiant clasp of diamonds +securing the braid of pearls which twined the dark glossy hair, +glittered with unusual brilliancy on that noble yet haughty brow, and +heightened the dazzling beauty of her countenance. The dark eyes +sparkling with animation, her cheek possessing the rose of buoyant youth +and health, the Grecian nose, the lip, which even pride could not rob of +its beauty, all combined to form a face lovely indeed. Fanny had gazed +and admired her young lady with suppressed exclamations of delight, +which were strangely at variance with the sigh that at that instant +sounded on Caroline's ear; she turned hastily and beheld her mother, who +was gazing on her with looks of such excessive tenderness, that a +strange pang of self-reproach darted through her heart, although it was +instantly banished by the fancy, that if it was with a sigh her mother +regarded her on such a night, how could she look for sympathy in the +pleasure then occupying her mind. At Oakwood every feeling, every +anticipation would have been instantly imparted, but now she only longed +to meet Annie, that to her all might be told without restraint. Painful, +indeed, was this unwonted silence of a child to the fond heart of Mrs. +Hamilton, but she refused to notice it. Much, very much, did she wish +to say, but she saw by the countenance of her daughter it might be +considered mistimed; yet to launch the beautiful girl she saw before her +into the labyrinth of the world, without uttering one word of the +thoughts which were thronging on her mind, she felt was impossible. They +might not have the effect she wished, yet she would do her duty. +Desiring Fanny to take her young lady's shawl down stairs, she gently +detained Caroline as she was about to follow her. + +"Listen to me but for a few minutes, my love," she said, in that +affectionate yet impressive tone, which seldom failed to arrest the +attention of her children, "and forgive me, if my words fall harshly and +coldly on your excited fancy. I know well the feelings that are yours, +though you perhaps think I do not, by the involuntary sigh you heard, +and I can sympathise with them, though lately you have refused to seek +my sympathy. Bright as are your anticipations, reality for a time will +be still brighter. Brilliant will be the scenes of enchantment in which +you will mingle,--brilliant indeed, for you are beautiful, my +Caroline--and admiration on all sides will be your own. Why should you +look on me with surprise, my child? that beauty on which perhaps my +heart has often dwelt too proudly, is not my gift nor of your creation. +The Great Being who has given you those charms of face and form will +mark how His gift is used; and oh, forget not for one moment His +all-seeing eye is as much upon you in the crowded ball as in the +retirement of your own room. You will be exposed to more temptations +than have yet been yours; the most dangerous temptations, adulation, +triumph, exciting pleasures of every kind, will be around you. The +world in radiant beauty will loudly call upon you to follow it alone, to +resign all things to become its votary; the trial of prosperity will +indeed be yours. Caroline, my child, for my sake, if not for your own, +resist them all. My happiness is in your hands. Seek your God in this +ordeal, even more than you would in that of adversity; there the spirit +naturally flies from earth, here it clings tenaciously to the world. +Pray to Him to resist the temptations that will surround--implore him to +teach you the best use of those charms He has bestowed on you. Forsake +him not; Caroline, I conjure you, be not drawn away from Him. Do not let +your thoughts be so wholly engrossed by pleasure as to prevent your +bestowing on Him but one hour of your day. Let me clasp my child to my +heart, when we return to Oakwood, unsullied, untouched by the stains of +the world. Let me have the blessed comfort of seeing my Caroline return +to the home of her childhood the same innocent happy being she was when +she left. I have ever endeavoured to make you happy, to give you those +pleasures you naturally desire, to form your character not only for the +happiness of this world, but for that of the next; then if you are ever +tempted to do wrong, if no higher consideration bids you pause, think on +your mother, Caroline; remember my happiness or misery greatly depends +on you, and, oh, if you have ever loved me, pause ere you proceed." + +"Mother, do not doubt me; Caroline Hamilton will never sully the name +she bears," replied Caroline, her eye flashing, and speaking proudly, to +conceal the emotion her mother's words had involuntarily produced. + +Mrs. Hamilton gazed on the haughty and satisfied security the features +of her child expressed. A more softened feeling would at that moment +better have pleased the yearning heart of the mother, but she checked +the rising sigh of disappointment, and folding Caroline to her bosom, +she imprinted a fond kiss on her noble brow, and murmuring, "God in +heaven bless you, my child, and grant you sufficient strength," they +descended the stairs together. + +Brilliant indeed was the scene that met the dazzled eyes of Caroline, as +she entered the elegant suite of rooms of the Duchess of Rothbury. The +highest rank, the greatest talent, the loveliest of beauty's daughters, +the manliest and noblest of her sons, were all assembled in that flood +of light which every apartment might be termed. Yet could the varied +countenances of these noble crowds have clearly marked the character +within, what a strange and varied page in the book of human life might +that ball have unfolded. + +But various as are the characters that compose an assemblage such as +this, the tone is generally given by the character and manner of the +lady of the house, and her Grace the Duchess of Rothbury was admirably +fitted for the position she filled. A daughter of fashion, bred up from +her earliest years in scenes of luxury and pomp, she had yet escaped the +selfishness, the artificial graces, which are there generally +predominant. She had married early in life, a marriage _a la mode_, that +is to say, not of love, but of interest on the part of her parents, and +on her own, dazzled, perhaps, by the exalted rank of the man who had +made her an offer of his hand. They were happy. The highly-principled +mind of the Duchess revolted from that conduct which would, even in the +_on dit_ of a censorious world, have called the very faintest whisper +on her name; and her husband, struck by the unwavering honour and +integrity of her conduct, gradually deserted the haunts of ignoble +pleasures which he had been wont to frequent, and paid her those marks +of consideration and respect, both in public and private life, which she +so greatly deserved. A large family had been the fruits of this union, +all of whom, except her two youngest daughters and two of her sons, were +married, and to the satisfaction of their parents. There was a degree of +reserve, amounting to severity, in the character of the Duchess, which +prevented that same affectionate confidence between her and her children +as subsisted in Mr. Hamilton's family. Yet she had been a kind and +careful mother, and her children ever proved, that surrounded as she +constantly was by the fashionable and the gay, she had presided over the +education of her daughters, and been more than usually particular in the +choice of governesses. Violent as she might be considered in her +prejudices for and against, yet there was that in her manner which alike +prevented the petty feelings of dislike and envy, and equally debarred +her from being regarded with any of that warm affection, for which no +one imagined how frequently she had pined. She stood alone, respected, +by many revered, and she was now content with this, though her youth had +longed for somewhat more. Her chosen friend, spite of the difference of +rank, had been Mr. Hamilton's mother, and she had watched with the +jealousy of true friendship the object of Arthur Hamilton's love. + +A brief yet penetrating survey of Emmeline Manvers' character she took, +and was satisfied. The devotion of Mrs. Hamilton, for so many years, to +her children she had ever admired, and frequently defended her with +warmth when any one ventured before her to condemn her conduct. Mr. and +Mrs. Hamilton regarded her with reverence and affection, and were +gratified at that kindness which insisted that the _entree_ of Caroline +should take place at her house. + +The Earl and Countess Elmore were also pre-eminent among the +guests--young, noble, exquisitely lovely, the latter at once riveted all +eyes, yet by the graceful dignity of her manner, repelled all advances +of familiarity. She might have been conscious of her charms, she could +not fail to be, but she only valued them as having attracted towards her +the man she loved. She only used them to endear him to his home; and it +was when alone with the Earl, that the sweet playfulness of her +character was displayed to its full extent, and scarcely could he then +believe her the same being who in society charmed as much by her dignity +and elegance, as by her surpassing beauty. The family of the Marquis of +Malvern were also present; they had been long known to Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton, who were glad to resume an intimacy which had been checked by +their retirement, but which had ever been remembered with mutual +pleasure. The Earl of St. Eval, eldest son of the Marquis, might have +been thought by many, who only knew him casually, as undeserving of the +high renown he enjoyed; and many young ladies would have wondered at +Emmeline Hamilton's undisguised admiration. Handsome he certainly was +not; yet intelligence and nobleness were stamped upon that broad +straight, brow, and those dark eyes were capable at times of speaking +the softest emotions of the human heart. But it was only when he +permitted himself to speak with energy that his countenance was +displayed to advantage, and then the bright rays of intellect and +goodness which gilded every feature, aided by the eloquent tones of his +full rich voice, would have made the most careless turn and look again, +and ask why they admired; but such times were few. Reserved, almost +painfully so, he was generally prone in such scenes as this to stand +alone, for few indeed were those of either sex with whom the soul of +Eugene St. Eval could hold commune; but this night there was more +animation than usual glittering in his dark eyes. He was the first of +the admiring crowd to join Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton's party, and petition +for the hand of Caroline in the next quadrille. It was with a smile of +proud satisfaction her father relinquished her to the young man, for she +had consented, although the watchful eye of her mother observed her +glance round the room, as if in search for some other, and a shade of +disappointment pass over her brow, that said her search was fruitless; +that feeling was but momentary, however. She joined the festive throng, +and her young heart beat quicker as she met the many glances of +undisguised admiration fixed constantly upon her. Seldom had Mr. +Hamilton been so beset as he was that night by the number of young men +who pressed forward to implore him for an introduction to his beautiful +daughter; and Caroline's every anticipation of triumph was indeed +fulfilled. Her mother was right. Reality was in this case far more +dazzling than even imagination had been. There were many in that +splendid scene equally, perhaps even more beautiful than Caroline +Hamilton, but she possessed the charm of which almost all around her +were deprived, that of novelty. She was, indeed, a novice amid scenes of +fashion, and the genuine pleasure her countenance expressed, appeared a +relief when compared to many around her. The name of Hamilton had never +been entirely forgotten in London. Their singularity in living so long +in unbroken retirement had been by many ridiculed, by others condemned, +as an attempt to appear better than their neighbours; and many were the +speculations as to whether the saintly Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton would +really do such a wicked thing as introduce their daughters into society, +or whether they would keep the poor girls in the country like nuns, to +be moped to death. Great, therefore, was the astonishment of some, and +equally great the pleasure to others, when Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton +reappeared amongst their London friends; and that night the warm +greetings of many old friends who thronged around them, eager to +introduce to their notice the young members of their families, afforded +a pleasing satisfaction to the heart of Mrs. Hamilton, whose gentle +courtesy and winning smile they found had not in the least deserted her. +The feelings of a mother swelled warmly within her as she gazed on her +child; her fond heart throbbed with chastened pride, as she marked the +unfeigned and respectful admiration Caroline received, and these +emotions, combined with the pleasure she felt at beholding again +well-remembered faces, and hearing the glad tones of eager greeting, +caused this evening to be equally as pleasurable to her, though in a +different way, as it was to Caroline. + +The attentions of Eugene St. Eval to Miss Hamilton continued as +unintermitting as they were respectful the whole of that night; and +Caroline, if she did not encourage, certainly forbade them not. She +listened to him with more attention; she appeared more animated with him +than with any of her other partners, one perhaps, alone excepted, and +yet she had taught her young heart to receive impressions to his +prejudice, which Annie never permitted an opportunity to pass without +carefully instilling. Why did she then permit his attentions? She knew +not; while listening to his voice, there was a fascination about him she +could not resist, but in her solitary hours she studiously banished his +image to give place to one whom, by the representations of Annie, she +persuaded herself that she loved alone. + +Genuine, indeed, had been the enjoyment of Caroline Hamilton, from the +first moment she had entered the ball-room; but if it could be +heightened, it was when, about the middle of the evening, Lord +Alphingham entered. A party of gay young men instantly surrounded him, +but breaking from them all, he attached himself the greater part of the +night to Mr. Hamilton. Only two quadrilles he danced with Caroline, but +they were enough to aid the schemes of Annie. She was at hand to excite, +to an almost painful degree, the mind of her friend, to speak in +rapturous praise of Lord Alphingham, to chain him now and then to her +side, and yet so contrive, that the whole of his conversation was with +Caroline; and yet the conduct of Annie Grahame had been such that night +as rather to excite the admiration than the censure of Mr. Hamilton. +Playfully he combated the prejudice of his wife, who as sportively owned +that Miss Grahame's conduct in society was different to that she had +anticipated; but her penetrative mind felt not the more at ease when she +thought on the friendship that subsisted between Annie and her child. + +"Am I dreaming, or is it Mrs. Hamilton I again behold?" exclaimed an +elderly gentleman, as she came forward, and hastily advancing, seized +both her hands, and pressed them with unfeigned warmth and pleasure, +which greeting Mrs. Hamilton as cordially returned. He was a very old +friend of her father's, and had attained by promotion his present high +rank of Admiral of the Blue, but had been the first captain under whose +orders her lamented brother sailed. Very many, therefore, were the +associations that filled her mind as she beheld him, and her mild eyes +for a moment glistened in uncontrollable emotion. + +"How very many changes have taken place since we have come alongside, +Mrs. Hamilton," the old veteran said, gazing on the blooming matron +before him with almost paternal pleasure. "Poor Delmont! could his kind +heart have borne up against the blow of poor Charles's fate, he surely +would have been happy, if all the tales I hear of his daughter Emmeline +be true." + +"Come and judge for yourself, Sir George; my home must ever be open to +my father's dearest friend," replied Mrs. Hamilton, endeavouring by +speaking playfully to conceal the painful reminiscences called forth by +his words. "I will not vouch for the truth of anything you may have +heard about us in London. You must contrive to moor your ship into the +harbour of Oakwood, and thus gratify us all." + +"Ay, ay; take care that I do not cast anchor there so long, that you +will find the best thing will be to cut the cables, send me adrift, and +thus get rid of me," replied the old sailor, delighted at her addressing +him in nautical phrase. "Your appearance here has belied half the +stories I heard; so now that you have given me permission, I shall set +sail to discover the truth of the rest." + +"You heard, I suppose, that Mr. Hamilton never intended his children to +visit London? They were too good, too--what may I term it?--too perfect, +to mingle with their fellow-creatures; is not that it, Admiral?" +demanded Mrs. Hamilton, with a smile. + +"Ay, ay; something very like it,--but glad to see the wind is changed +from that corner. Don't like solitude, particularly for young +folks,--and how many are here?" + +"Of my children?" The veteran nodded. "But one, my eldest girl. I do not +consider her sister quite old enough to be introduced." + +"And you left her in harbour, and only permitted one frigate to cruise. +If she had any of her uncle Charles's spirit, she would have shown some +little insubordination at that piece of discipline, Mrs. Hamilton," said +the old man, joyously. + +"Not if my authority is established somewhat like Sir George's, on the +basis of affection," replied Mrs. Hamilton, again smiling. + +"Ay, you have learnt that secret of government, have you? Now who would +think this was the little quiet girl I had dandled on my knee, and told +her tales of storm and war that made her shudder? And where are your +sons?" + +"Both at college." + +"What, neither of them a chip of the old block, and neither of them for +the sea? Don't like their taste. No spirit of salt-water within them." + +"But neither of them deficient in spirit for a life on shore. But, +however, to set your heart at ease, for the naval honour of our family, +Sir George, I have a nephew, who, I think, some few years hence will +prove a brave and gallant son of Neptune. The accounts we have of him +are most pleasing. He has inherited all poor Charles's spirit and +daring, as well as that true courage, for which you have said my brother +was so remarkable." + +"Glad of it--glad of it; but what nephew? who is he? A nephew of Mr. +Hamilton's will not raise the glory of the Delmont family; and you had +only one brother, if I remember rightly?" + +"Have you quite forgotten the beautiful girl, who, when I last had the +pleasure of meeting you in such a scene as this, was the object of +universal attraction? You surely remember my father's favourite Eleanor, +Sir George?" + +"Eleanor--Eleanor--let me think;" and the old sailor for a moment put +himself in a musing attitude, and then starting, exclaimed, "to be sure +I do; the loveliest girl I ever cast eyes upon;--and what has become of +her? By the bye, there was some story about her, was there not? She +chose a husband for herself, and ran off, and broke her poor father's +heart. Where is she now?" + +"Let her faults be forgotten, my dear Sir George," replied Mrs. +Hamilton, with some emotion. "They were fully, painfully repented. Let +them die with her." + +"Die! Is she, too, dead? What, that graceful sylph, that exquisite +creature I see before me now, in all the pride of conscious loveliness!" +and the veteran drew his rough hand across his eyes in unfeigned +emotion, then hastily recovering himself, he said, "and this boy--this +sailor is her son. I can hardly believe it possible. Why he surely +cannot be old enough to go to sea." + +"You forget the number of years that have passed, Sir George. Edward is +now eighteen, as old, if not older, than his mother was when you last +saw her." + +"And when did poor Eleanor die?" + +"Six years ago. She had been left a widow in India, and only reached her +native land to breathe her last in my arms. You will be pleased, I +think, with her daughter, though, on second thought, perhaps, she may +not be quite lively enough for you; however, I must beg your notice for +her, as her attachment to her brother is so excessive, that all relating +to the sea is to her in the highest degree interesting." + +"And do your sister's children live with you--had their father no +relations?" + +"None; and even if he had, I should have petitioned to bring them up and +adopt them as my own. Poor children, when their mother died, their +situation was indeed melancholy. Helpless orphans of ten and scarcely +twelve, cast on a strange land, without one single friend to whom they +could look for succour or protection. My heart bled for them, and never +once have I regretted my decision." + +The old man looked at her glowing cheek in admiration, and pressing her +hand, he said warmly, prefacing his words, as he always did, with the +affirmative "ay, ay." + +"Your father's daughter must be somewhat different to others of her +rank. I must come and see you, positively I must. Wind and tide will be +strongly against me, if you do not see me in a few days anchoring off +your coast. No storms disturb your harbour, I fancy. But what has become +of your husband--your daughter? let me see all I can belonging to you. +Come, Mrs. Hamilton, crowd sail, and tow me at once to my wished for +port." + +Entering playfully into the veteran's humour, Mrs. Hamilton took his arm +and returned to the ball-room, where she was speedily joined by her +husband, who welcomed Sir George Wilmot with as much warmth and +cordiality as his wife had done, and as soon as the quadrille was +finished, a glance from her mother brought Caroline and her partner, +Lord Alphingham, to her side. + +The astonishment of Sir George, as Mrs. Hamilton introduced the blooming +girl before him as her daughter, was so irresistibly comic, that no one +present could prevent a smile; and that surprise was heightened when, in +answer to his supposition that she must be the eldest of Mrs. Hamilton's +family, Mrs. Hamilton replied that her two sons were both older, and +Caroline was, indeed, the youngest but one. + +"Then I tell you what, Mrs. Hamilton," the old veteran said, "Old Time +has been playing tricks with me, and drawing me much nearer eternity +than I at all imagined myself, or else he has stopped with me and gone +on with you." + +"Or rather, my good friend," replied Mr. Hamilton, "you can only trace +the hand of Time upon yourself, having no children in whose increasing +years you can behold him, and, therefore, he is very likely to slip the +cable before you are aware; but with us such cannot be." + +"Ay, ay, Hamilton, suppose it must be so--wish I had some children of my +own, but shall come and watch Time's progress on these instead. Ah, Miss +Hamilton, why am I such an old man? I see all the youngsters running off +with the pretty girls, and I cannot venture to ask one to dance with +me." + +"May I venture to ask you then, Sir George? The name of Admiral Wilmot +would be sufficient for any girl, I should think, to feel proud of her +partner, even were he much older and much less gallant than you, Sir +George," answered Caroline, with ready courtesy, for she had often heard +her mother speak of him, and his manner pleased her. + +"Well, that's a pretty fair challenge, Sir George; you must take up the +glove thrown from so fair a hand," observed Lord Alphingham, with a +smile that, to Caroline, and even to her mother, rendered his strikingly +handsome features yet handsomer. "Shall I relinquish my partner?" + +"No, no, Alphingham; you are better suited to her here. At home--at your +_own_ home, Miss Hamilton, one night, I shall remind you of your +promise, and we will trip it together. Now I can only thank you for your +courtesy; it has done my heart good, and reconciled me to my old age." + +"I may chance to find a rival at home, Sir George. If you see my sister, +you will not be content with me. She will use every effort to surpass me +in your good graces; for when I tell her I have seen the brave admiral +whose exploits have often caused her cheek to flush with pride--patriot +pride she calls it--she will be wild till she has seen you." + +"Will she--will she, indeed? Come and see her to-morrow; tell her so, +with an old man's love, and that I scolded your mother heartily for not +bringing her to-night. Mind orders; let me see if you are sailor enough +instinctively to obey an old captain's orders." + +"Trust me, Sir George," replied Caroline, laughingly, and a young man at +that instant addressing her by name, she bowed gracefully to the +veteran, and turned towards him who spoke. + +"Miss Hamilton, I claim your promise for this quadrille," said Lord +Henry D'Este. + +"Good bye," said Sir George. "I shall claim you for my partner when I +see you at home." + +"St. Eval dancing again. Merciful powers! we certainly shall have the +roof tumbling over our heads," exclaimed Lord Henry, as he and Caroline +found themselves _vis a vis_ to the earl of whom he spoke. + +"Why, is it so very extraordinary that a young man should dance?" +demanded Caroline. + +"A philosopher as he is, decidedly. You do not know him, Miss Hamilton. +He travelled all over Europe, I believe, really for the sake of +improvement, instead of enjoying all the fun he might have had; he +stored his brain with all sorts of knowledge, collecting material and +stealing legends to write a book. I went with him part of the way, but +became so tired of my companion, that I turned recreant and fled, to +enjoy a more spirited excursion of my own. I tell him, whenever I want a +lecture on all subjects, I shall come to him. I call him the Walking +Cyclopaedia, and only fancy such a personage dancing a quadrille. What +lady can have the courage to turn over the leaves of the Cyclopaedia in +a quadrille? let me see. Oh, Lady Lucy Melville, our noble hostess's +daughter. She pretends to be a bit of a blue, therefore they are not so +ill-matched as I imagined; however, she is not very bad--not a deep +blue, only just tinged with celestial azure. Sweet creature, how you +will be edified before your lesson is over. Look, Miss Hamilton, on the +other side of the Cyclopaedia. That good lady has been the last seven +years dancing with all her might and main for a husband. There is +another, striving, by an air of elegant hauteur, to prove she is +something very great, when really she is nothing at all. There's a girl +just introduced, as our noble poet says." + +"Take care, take care, Lord Henry; you are treading on dangerous +ground," exclaimed Caroline, unable to prevent laughing at the comic +manner in which her companion criticised the dancers. "You forget that I +too have only just been released, and that this is only my first glimpse +of the world." + +"You do me injustice, Miss Hamilton. I am too delightfully and +refreshingly reminded of that truth to forget it for one instant. You +may have only just made your _debut_, but you have not been schooled and +scolded, and frightened into propriety as that unfortunate girl has. If +she has smiled once too naturally, spoken one word too much, made one +step wrong, or said sir, my lord, your lordship, once too often, she +will have such a lecture to-morrow, she will never wish to go to a ball +again." + +"Poor girl!" said Caroline, in a tone of genuine pity, which caused a +smile from her partner. + +"She is not worthy of your pity, Miss Hamilton; she is hardened to it +all. What a set we are dancing with, men and women, all heartless alike; +but I want to know what magic wand has touched St. Eval. I do believe it +must be your eyes, Miss Hamilton. He talks to his partner, and looks at +you; tries to do two things at once, listen to her, and hear your voice. +You are the enchantress, depend upon it." + +A glow of triumph burned on the heart of Caroline at these words. For +though rather prejudiced against St. Eval by the arts of Annie, still, +to make an impression on one whom she had heard was invulnerable to all, +to make the calm, and some said, severely stoical, St. Eval bend beneath +her power, was a triumph she determined to achieve. That spirit of +coquetry so fatal to her aunt, the ill-fated Eleanor, was as innate in +the bosom of Caroline; no opportunity had yet offered to give it play, +still the seeds were there, and she could not resist the temptation now +presented. Even in her childhood Mrs. Hamilton had marked this fatal +propensity. Every effort had been put in force to check it, every gentle +counsel given, but arrested in its growth though it was, erased entirely +it could not be. The principles of virtue had been too carefully +instilled, for coquetry to attain the same ascendancy and indulgence +with Caroline as it had with her aunt, yet she felt she could no longer +control the inclination which the present opportunity afforded her to +use her power. + +"Do you go to the Marchioness of Malvern's fete, next week?" demanded +Lord Henry. Caroline answered in the affirmative. + +"I am glad of it. The Walking Cyclopaedia may make himself as agreeable +there as he has so marvellously done to-night. You will be in fairy +land. He has brought flowers from every country, and reared them for his +mother, till they have become the admiration of all for miles around. I +told him he looked like a market gardener, collecting flowers from every +place he went to. I dragged him away several times, and told him he +would certainly be taken for a country booby, and scolded him for +demeaning his rank with such ignoble pleasures, and what wise answer do +you think he made me?" + +"A very excellent one, I have no doubt." + +"Or it would not come from such a learned personage, Miss Hamilton. +Really it was so philosophic, I was obliged to learn it as a lesson to +retain it. That he, superior as he deemed himself, and that wild flower +which he tended with so much care, were alike the work of Infinite +Wisdom, and as such, the study of the one could not demean the other. I +stared at him, and for the space of a week dubbed him the Preaching +Pilgrim; but I was soon tired of that, and resumed his former one, which +comprises all. I wonder at what letter the walking volume will be opened +at his mother's fete?" + +"I should imagine B," said Caroline, smiling. + +"B--B--what does B stand for? I have forgotten how to spell--let me see. +Ah! I have it,--excellent, admirable! Miss Hamilton. Lecture on Botany +from the Walking Cyclopaedia--bravo! We had better scrape up all our +learning, to prove we are not perfect ignoramuses on the subject." + +Caroline laughingly agreed; and the quadrille being finished, Lord +Henry succeeded in persuading her to accompany him to the +refreshment-room. + +In the meanwhile, perfectly unconscious that he had been the subject of +the animated conversation of his _vis a vis_, St. Eval was finding more +and more to admire in Miss Hamilton. He conducted his partner to her +seat as she desired, and then strolled towards Mr. Hamilton's party, in +the hope that Caroline would soon rejoin her mother; but Annie had been +in the refreshment-room, and she did not reappear for some little time. +Mrs. Hamilton had at length been enabled to seek Lady Helen Grahame, +with whom she remained conversing, for she felt, though the delay was +unavoidable, she partly deserved the reproach with which Lady Helen +greeted her, when she entered, for permitting the whole evening to pass +without coming near her. Mrs. Hamilton perceived, with regret, that she +was more fitted for the quiet of her own boudoir, than the glare and +heat of crowded rooms. Gently she ventured to expostulate with her on +her endeavours, and Lady Helen acknowledged she felt quite unequal to +the exertion, but that the persuasions of her daughter had brought her +there. She was too indolent to add, she had seen nothing of Annie the +whole evening; nor did she wish to say anything that might increase the +disapprobation with which she sometimes felt, though Annie heeded it +not, Mrs. Hamilton regarded her child. It was admiration, almost +veneration, which Lady Helen felt for Mrs. Hamilton, and no one could +have imagined how very frequently the indolent but well-meaning woman +had regretted what she deemed was her utter inability to act with the +same firmness that characterised her friend. She was delighted at the +notice Lilla ever received from her; but blinded by the artful manners +of her elder girl, she often wished that Annie had been the favourite +instead. There was somewhat in Mrs. Hamilton's manner that night that +caused her to feel her own inferiority more than ever; but no +self-reproach mingled with the feeling. She could not be like her, and +then why should she expect or deplore what was impossible. Leaning on +Mrs. Hamilton's arm, she resolved, however, to visit the ball-room, and +they reached Mr. Hamilton at the instant Grahame joined them. + +"You here, Grahame!" exclaimed his friend, as he approached. "I thought +you had forsworn such things." + +"I make an exception to-night," he answered. "I wished to see my fair +friend Caroline where I have longed to see her." + +"You are honoured, indeed, Mrs. Hamilton," Lady Helen could not refrain +from saying. "He was not present at the _entree_ even of his own +daughter." + +"And why was I not, Lady Helen? because I would not by my presence give +the world reason to say I also approved of the very early age at which +Miss Grahame was introduced. If I do not mistake, she is four months +younger than Caroline, and yet my daughter is no longer a novice in such +scenes as these." + +Lady Helen shrunk in terror from the stern glance of her husband, who +little knew the pain he inflicted; and Mrs. Hamilton hastily, but +cautiously drew her away to enter into conversation with the Marchioness +of Malvern, who was near them, which little manoeuvre quickly removed +the transient cloud; and though soon again compelled to seek the shelter +of the quiet little room she had quitted, the friendly kindness of Mrs. +Hamilton succeeded in making Lady Helen's evening end more agreeably +than it had begun. + +"Are you only just released, Grahame?" demanded Lord Alphingham, who +still remained near Mr. Hamilton. + +"You are less fortunate than I was, or perhaps you will think, in +parliamentary concerns, more so; but as the ball was uppermost in my +thoughts this evening, I was glad to find myself at liberty above an +hour ago." + +"Is there nothing, then, stirring in the Upper House?" + +"Nothing; I saw many of the noble members fast asleep, and those who +spoke said little to the purpose. When do you gentlemen of the Lower +House send up your bill? it will be a charity to give us something to +do." + +"We shall be charitable then on Friday next, and I much doubt if you do +not have some warm debating work. If we succeed, it will be a glorious +triumph; the Whigs are violent against us, and they are by far the +strongest party. I depend greatly on your eloquence, Alphingham." + +"It is yours to the full extent of its power, my good friend; it carries +some weight along with it, I believe, and I would gladly use it in a +good cause." + +"Did you speak to-night, Grahame?" Mr. Hamilton asked, evincing by his +animated countenance an interest in politics, which, from his retired +life, no one believed that he possessed. Grahame eagerly entered into +the detail of that night's debate, and for a little time the three +gentlemen were absorbed in politics alone. The approach of Caroline and +her mother, however, caused Grahame suddenly to break off in his speech. + +"A truce with debates, for the present," he gaily exclaimed. "Hamilton, +I never saw Caroline's extraordinary likeness to you till this moment. +What a noble-looking girl she is! Ah, Hamilton, I could pardon you if +you were much prouder of your children than you are." + +An involuntary sigh broke from his lips as he spoke, but checking it, he +hastened to Caroline, and amused her with animated discourse, till Lord +Alphingham and Eugene St. Eval at the same instant approached, the one +to claim, the other to request, Caroline as his partner in the last +quadrille before supper. The shade of deep disappointment which passed +over the young Earl's expressive countenance as Caroline eagerly +accepted the Viscount's offered arm, and owned she had been engaged to +him some time, at once confirmed to her flattered fancy the truth of +Lord Henry's words, and occasioned a feeling near akin to pleasure in +the equally observant mother. Mrs. Hamilton shrunk with horror at the +idea of introducing her child into society merely for the purpose of +decoying a husband; but she must have been void of natural feeling had +not the thought very often crossed her mind, that the time was drawing +nigh when her daughter's earthly destiny would, in all probability, be +fixed for ever; and in the midst of the tremblings of maternal love the +natural wish would mingle, that noble rank and manly virtue might be the +endowments of him who would wed her Caroline, and amongst those noble +youths with whom she had lately mingled, she had seen but one her fond +heart deemed on all points worthy of her child, and that one was the +young Earl Eugene St. Eval. That he was attracted, her penetrating eye +could scarcely doubt, but farther she would not think; and so great was +her sensitiveness on this head, that much as she admired the young man, +she was much more reserved with him than she would have been had she +suspected nothing of his newly dawning feelings. + +St. Eval did not join in the quadrille, and after lingering by Mrs. +Hamilton till she was invited to the supper-room, he aroused the +increased merriment of his tormentor, Lord Henry, by offering her his +arm, conducting her to supper, and devoting himself to her, he declared, +as if she were the youngest and prettiest girl in the room. + +"Playing the agreeable to mamma, to win the good graces of _la fille_. +Admirable diplomacy; Lord St. Eval, I wish you joy of your new talent," +maliciously remarked Lord Henry, as the Earl and his companion passed +him. A glance from those dark eyes, severe enough to have sent terror to +the soul of any less reckless than Lord Henry, was St. Eval's only +reply, and he passed on; and seldom did Mrs. Hamilton find a companion +more to her taste in a supper-room than the young Earl. The leaves of +the Walking Cyclopaedia were indeed then opened, Henry D'Este would have +said, for on very many subjects did St. Eval allow himself that evening +to converse, which, except to his mother and sisters, were ever locked +in the recesses of his own reflecting mind; but there was a kindness, +almost maternal, which Mrs. Hamilton unconsciously used to every young +person who sought her company, and that charm the young and gifted +nobleman never could resist. He spoke of her sons in a manner that could +not fail to attract a mother's heart. The six months he had spent with +them at college had been sufficient for him to form an intimate +friendship with Percy, whose endeavours to gain his esteem he had been +unable to resist; while he regretted that the reserved disposition of +Herbert, being so like his own, had prevented his knowing him so well as +his brother. He spoke too of a distant relative of Mrs. Hamilton's, the +present Lord Delmont, in whom, as the representative of her ancient +family, she was much interested. St. Eval described with eloquence the +lovely villa he occupied on the banks of Lago Guardia, near the +frontiers of the Tyrol, the health of his only sister, some few years +younger than himself, not permitting them to live in England; he had +given up all the invitations to home and pleasure held out to him by his +father-land, and retiring to Italy, devoted himself entirely to his +mother and sister. + +"He is a brother and son after your own heart, Mrs. Hamilton," concluded +St. Eval, with animation, "and that is the highest compliment I can pay +him." + +Mrs. Hamilton smiled, and as she gazed on the glowing features of the +young man, she thought he who could so well appreciate such virtues +could not be--nay, she knew he was not--deficient in them himself, and +stronger than ever became her secret wish; but she hastily banished it, +and gave her sole attention to the interesting subjects on which St. +Eval continued to speak. + +For some few hours after supper the ball continued, with even, perhaps, +more spirit than it had commenced; but St. Eval did not ask Caroline to +dance again. He fancied she preferred Alphingham's attentions, and his +sensitive mind shrunk from being again refused. Caroline knew not the +heart of him over whom she had resolved to use her power, perhaps if she +had, she would have hesitated in her determination. The least +encouragement made his heart glow with an uncontrollable sensation of +exquisite pleasure, while repulse bade it sink back with an equal if not +a greater degree of pain. St. Eval was conscious of this weakness in his +character; he was aware that he possessed a depth of feeling, which +unless steadily controlled, would tend only to his misery; and it was +for this he clothed himself in impenetrable reserve, and obtained from +the world the character of being proud and disagreeable. He dreaded the +first entrance of love within his bosom, for instinctively he felt that +his very sensitiveness would render the passion more his misery than his +joy. We are rather sceptics in the doctrine of love at first sight, but +in this case it was fervid and enduring, as if it had risen on the solid +basis of intimacy and esteem. From the first hour he had spent in the +society of Caroline Hamilton, Eugene St. Eval loved. He tried to subdue +and conquer his newly-awakened feelings, and would think he had +succeeded, but the next hour he passed in her society brought the truth +clearer than ever before his eyes; her image alone occupied his heart. +He shrunk, in his overwrought sensitiveness, from paying her those +attentions which would have marked his preference; he did not wish to +excite the remarks of the world, nor did he feel that he possessed +sufficient courage to bear the repulse, with which, if she did not +regard him, and if she were the girl he fancied her, she would cheek his +forwardness. But his heart beat high, and it was with some difficulty he +controlled his emotion, when he perceived that Caroline refused to dance +even with Lord Alphingham on several occasions, to continue conversing +with himself. How his noble spirit would have chafed and bled, could he +have known it was love of power and coquetry that dictated her manner, +and not regard, as for the time he allowed himself to fancy. + +The evening closed, the noble guests departed, and daylight had resumed +its reign over the earth by the time Mr. Hamilton's carriage stopped in +Berkeley Square. Animatedly had Caroline conversed with her parents on +the pleasures of the evening during their drive; but when she reached +her own room, when Martyn had left her, and she was alone, she was not +quite sure if a few faint whisperings of self-reproach did not in a +degree alloy the retrospection of this her first glimpse of the gay +world; but quickly--perhaps too quickly--they were banished. The +attentions of Lord Alphingham--heightened in their charm by Miss +Grahame's positive assurance to her friend that the Viscount was +attracted, there was not the very slightest doubt of it--and the +proposed pleasure of compelling the proud, reserved St. Eval to yield to +her fascinations, alone occupied her fancy. To make him her captive +would be triumph indeed. She wished, too, to show Annie she was not so +completely under control as she fancied; that she, too, could act with +the spirit of a girl of fashion; and to choose St. Eval, and +succeed--charm him to her side--force him to pay her attentions which no +other received, would, indeed, prove to her fashionable companions that +she was not so entirely governed by her mother, so very simple and +spiritless as they supposed. Her power should do that which all had +attempted in vain. Her cheek glowed, her heart burned with the bright +hope of expected triumph, and when she at length sunk to sleep, it was +to dream of St. Eval at her feet. + +Oh! were the counsels, the example, the appeal of her mother all +forgotten? Was this a mother's recompense? Alas! alas! + + + + +CHAPTER IV. + + +Numerous were the cards and invitations now left at Mr. Hamilton's door; +and the world, in its most tempting form, was indeed spread before +Caroline, although, perhaps, compared with the constant routine of +pleasure pursued by some young ladies who attend two or three assemblies +each of the six nights out of the seven, her life could scarcely be +called gay. Mr. Hamilton had drawn a line, and, difficult as it was to +keep, he adhered to his resolution, notwithstanding the entreaties of +his friends, and very often those of his daughter. A dinner-party and a +ball he would sometimes permit Caroline to attend in one day, but the +flying from house to house, to taste of every pleasure offered, he never +would allow. Nor did he or any member of his family ever attend the +Opera on Saturday night, however great might be the attractions. To +Emmeline this was a great privation, as poetry and music had ever been +her chief delights, and the loss of even one night's enjoyment was felt +severely; but she acquiesced without a murmur, appreciating the truth of +her father's remark, that it was impossible to pay attention to the +Sabbath duties when the previous evening had been thus employed. She +knew, too, how difficult it was to attend to her studies (due regard for +which her parents required amidst every recreation) on the Wednesday, +with every air she had so delighted in the previous night ringing in her +ears. Those who were eager to condemn Mrs. Hamilton whenever they +could, declared it was the greatest inconsistency to take Emmeline to +the Opera, and permit her to appear so often in company at home, and yet +in other matters he so strict; why could she not bring her out at once, +instead of only tantalizing her? but Mrs. Hamilton could never do +anything like anybody else. Her daughters were much to be pitied; and as +for her niece, she must pass a miserable life, for she was scarcely ever +seen. They had no doubt, with all Mrs. Hamilton's pretensions to +goodness, that her poor niece was utterly neglected, and kept quite in +the background; because she was so beautiful, Mrs. Hamilton was jealous +of the notice she might obtain. + +So thought, and so very often spoke, the ill-natured half of the world, +who, in reality, jealous and displeased at being excluded from Mr. +Hamilton's visiting list, did everything in their power to lessen the +estimation in which the family was held. In this, however, they could +not succeed, nor in causing pain to those whom they wished to wound. +Such petty malice demanded not a second thought from minds so +well-regulated as those of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton. Mrs. Hamilton, indeed, +turned their ill-natured remarks to advantage, for instead of neglecting +or wholly despising them, she considered them in her own heart, and in +solitary reflection pondered deeply if she in any way deserved them. She +knew that the lesson of self-knowledge is never entirely learnt; and she +knew too, that an enemy may say that in ill-will or malice which may +have some foundation, though our friends, aided by self-love, may have +hidden the truth from us. Deeply did this noble woman think on her plan +of conduct; severely she scrutinized its every motive, and she was at +peace. Before entering upon it she had implored the Divine blessing, and +she felt that, in the case of Emmeline and Ellen, her prayers for +guidance had not been unheeded. Perhaps her conduct, with regard to the +former, might have appeared inconsistent; but she felt no ill-will +towards those who condemned, knowing the disposition of her child, and +certainly those who thus spoke did not. + +Although there was little more than fourteen months difference between +the age of the sisters, Emmeline was so much a child in simplicity and +feeling, that her mother felt assured it would neither be doing her good +nor tending to her happiness to introduce her with her sister; as, from +the little difference in their ages, some mothers might have been +inclined to do. Yet she did not wish to keep her in such entire +seclusion as some, even of her friends, advised, but permitted her the +enjoyment of those innocent pleasures natural to her taste. Emmeline had +never once murmured at this arrangement; however it interfered with her +most earnest wishes, her confidence in her parents was such, that she +ever submitted to their wishes with cheerfulness. Mrs. Hamilton knew and +sympathised in her feelings at leaving Oakwood. She felt there were +indeed few pleasures in London that could compensate to a disposition +such as Emmeline's for those she had left. She had seen, with joy and +thankfulness, the conquest of self which her child had so perseveringly +achieved; and surely she was not wrong to reward her, by giving her +every gratification in her power, and endeavouring to make her as happy +as she was at Oakwood. Emmeline was no longer a child, and these +pleasures interfered not with the attention her parents still wished her +to bestow on the completion of her education. With all the innocence and +quiet of a young child she enjoyed the select parties given by her +mother with the same zest, but with the poetic feelings of dawning +youth. She absolutely revelled in the Opera, and there her mother +generally accompanied her once a week. An artist might have found a +pleasing study in the contemplation of that young, bright face, as she +sat entranced, every sense absorbed in the music which she heard, the +varying expression of her countenance reflecting every emotion acted +before her. At such moments the fond mother felt it to be impossible to +deny the young enthusiast the rich treat these musical recreations +afforded. A smile or look of sympathy was ever ready to meet the often +uncontrolled expressions of delight which Emmeline could not suppress, +for in thus listening to the compositions of our great masters, even +those much older than Emmeline can seldom entirely command their +emotions. Natural as were the manners of Caroline in public, they almost +resembled art when compared with those of her sister. Mrs. Hamilton's +lesson on self-control had not been forgotten. Emmeline generally +contrived to behave with perfect propriety, except in moments of +excitement such as these, where natural enthusiasm and almost childish +glee would have their play, and her mother could not, would not check +them. + +With regard to Ellen, the thoughtless remarks of the world were indeed +unfounded, as all who recollect the incidents detailed in former pages +will readily believe. Her health still continued so delicate as +frequently to occasion her aunt some anxiety. Through the winter, +strange to say, she had not suffered, but the spring brought on, at +intervals, those depressing feelings of languor which Mrs. Hamilton +hoped had been entirely conquered. The least exertion or excitement +caused her to suffer the following day, and therefore, except at very +small parties, she did not appear even at home. No one could suspect +from her quiet and controlled manner, and her apparently inanimate +though beautiful features, that she was as enthusiastic in mind and in +the delights of the Opera as her cousin Emmeline. By no one we do not +mean her aunt, for Mrs. Hamilton could now trace every feeling of that +young and sorrowing heart, and she saw with regret, that in her niece's +present state of health, even that pleasure must be denied her, for the +very exertion attendant on it was too much. Ellen never expressed +regret, nor did she ever breathe even to her aunt how often, how very +often, she longed once again to enjoy the fresh air of Oakwood, for +London to her possessed not even the few attractions it did to Emmeline. +She ever struggled to be cheerful, to smile when her aunt looked +anxiously at her, and strove to assure her that she was happy, perfectly +happy. Her never appearing as Emmeline did, and so very seldom even at +home, certainly gave matter for observation to those who, seeking for +it, refused to believe the true reason of her retirement. Miss Harcourt, +though she steadfastly refused to go out with her friend--for Mrs. +Hamilton never could allow that she filled any situation save that of a +friend and relation of the family--yet sometimes accompanied Emmeline to +the Opera, and always joined Mrs. Hamilton at home. Many, therefore, +were the hours Ellen spent entirely alone, but she persevered +unrepiningly in the course laid down for her by the first medical man in +London, whom her aunt had consulted. + +How she employed those lonely hours Mrs. Hamilton never would inquire. +Perfect liberty to follow her own inclinations she should enjoy at +least; but it was not without pain that Mrs. Hamilton so frequently left +her niece. She knew that the greatest privation, far more than any of +the pleasures her cousins enjoyed, was the loss of her society. The +mornings and evenings were now so much occupied, that it often happened +that the Sabbath and the evening previous were the only times Ellen +could have intercourse of any duration with her. She regretted this +deeply, for Ellen was no longer a child; she was at that age when life +is in general keenly susceptible to the pleasures of society; and +reserved as was her disposition, Mrs. Hamilton felt assured, the loss of +that unchecked domestic intercourse she had so long enjoyed at Oakwood +was pain, though never once was she heard to complain. These contrary +duties frequently grieved the heart of her aunt. Often she accompanied +Caroline when her inclination prompted her to remain at home; for she +loved Ellen as her own child, and to tend and soothe her would sometimes +have been the preferable duty; but she checked the wish, for suffering +and solitary as was Ellen, Caroline, in the dangerous labyrinth of the +world, required her care still more. + +There are trials which the world regards not--trials on which there are +many who look lightly--those productive of no interest, seldom of +sympathy, but with pain to the sufferer; it is when health fails, not +sufficiently to attract notice, but when the disordered state of the +nerves renders the mind irritable, the body weak; when from that +invisible weakness, little evils become great, the temper loses its +equanimity, the spirits their elasticity, we scarcely know wherefore, +and we reproach ourselves, and add to our uneasiness by thinking we are +becoming pettish and ill-tempered, enervated and repining; we dare not +confess such feelings, for our looks proclaim not failing health, and +who would believe us? when the very struggle for cheerfulness fills the +eye with tears, the heart with heaviness, and we feel provoked at our +peevishness, and angry that we are so different now to what we have +been; and we fancy, changed as we are, all we love can no longer regard +us as formerly. Such are among the trials of woman, unknown, frequently +unsuspected, by her nearest and dearest relations; and bitter indeed is +it when such trials befall us in early youth, when liveliness and +buoyancy are expected, and any departure therefrom is imagined to +proceed from causes very opposite to the truth. Such at present were the +trials of the orphan; but they were softened by the kindness and +sympathy of her aunt, who possessed the happy art of soothing more +effectually in a few words than others of a less kindly mould could ever +have accomplished. + +It is in the quick perception of character, in the adaptation of our +words to those whom we address, that in domestic circles renders us +beloved, and forms the fascination of society. Sympathy is the charm of +human life, and when once that is made apparent, we are not slow in +discovering or imagining others. Some people find the encouragement of +sympathy disagreeable, for they say it makes them miserable for no +purpose. What care they for the woes and joys of their acquaintances? +Often a tax, and never a pleasure. Minds of such nature know not that +there is a "joy in the midst of grief;" but Mrs. Hamilton did, and she +encouraged every kindly feeling of her nature. Previous to her marriage, +she had been perhaps too reserved and shrinking within herself, fancied +there was no one of her own rank at least who could understand her, and +therefore none with whom she could sympathise. But the greater +confidence of maturer years, the example of her husband, the emotions of +a wife and mother, had enlarged her heart, and caused her, by ready +sympathy with others, to increase her own enjoyments, and render herself +more pleasing than perhaps, if she had remained single, she ever would +have been. It was this invisible charm that caused her to be admired and +involuntarily loved, even by those who, considering her a saint at +first, shrunk in dread from her society, and it was this that rendered +the frequent trials of her niece less difficult to bear. + +"Does my Ellen remember a little conversation we had on the eve of her +last birthday?" demanded Mrs. Hamilton of her niece one evening, as she +had finished dressing, to attend her daughter to the Opera, and Martyn, +at her desire, had obeyed Caroline's impatient summons, and left to +Ellen the task of fastening her lady's jewels. + +Whenever nothing occurred to prevent it, Ellen was generally with her +aunt at dressing-time, and the little conversation that passed between +them at such periods frequently rendered Ellen's solitary evening +cheerful, when otherwise it might have been, from her state of health +and apparently endless task, even gloomy. Mrs. Hamilton had observed a +more than usual depression that evening in the manners of her niece, +and, without noticing, she endeavoured to remove it. Ellen was bending +down to clasp a bracelet as she spoke, and surprised at the question, +looked up, without giving herself time to conceal an involuntary tear, +though she endeavoured to remove any such impression, by smiling +cheerfully as she replied in the affirmative. + +"And will it cheer your solitary evenings, then, my dear Ellen?" she +continued, drawing her niece to her, and kissing her transparent brow, +"if I say that, in the self-denial, patience, and submission you are now +practising, you are doing more, towards raising your character in my +estimation, and banishing from remembrance the painful past, than you +once fancied it would ever be in your power to do. I think I know its +motive, and therefore I do not hesitate to bestow the meed of praise you +so well deserve." + +For a minute Ellen replied not, she only raised her aunt's hand to her +lips and kissed it, as if to hide her emotion before she spoke, but her +eyes were still swelling with tears as she looked up and +replied--"Indeed, my dearest aunt, I do not deserve it. You do not know +how irritable and ill-tempered I often feel." + +"Because you are not very well, my love, and yet you do not feel +sufficiently ill to complain. I sometimes fancy such a state of health +as yours is more difficult to bear than a severe though short illness, +then, you can, at least, claim soothing consolation and sympathy. Now my +poor Ellen thinks she can demand neither," she added, smiling. + +"I always receive both from you," replied Ellen, earnestly; "and not +much submission is required when that is the case, and I am told my +health forbids my sharing in Emmeline's pleasures." + +"No, love, there would not be, if you felt so ill as to have no desire +for them; but that is not the case, for I know you very often feel quite +well enough to go out with me, and I am quite sure that my Ellen +sometimes wishes she were not so completely prohibited such amusements." + +"I thought I had succeeded better in concealing those wishes," replied +Ellen, blushing deeply. + +"So you have, my dear girl, no one but myself suspects them; and you +could not expect to conceal them from me, Ellen, could you, when +Emmeline says it is utterly impossible to hide her most secret thought +from my mystic wand? Do not attempt more, my love; persevere in your +present conduct, and I shall be quite satisfied. Have you an interesting +book for to-night, or is there any other employment you prefer?" + +"You have banished all thoughts of gloom, my dear aunt, and perhaps, +instead of reading, I shall work and think on what you have said," +exclaimed Ellen, her cheek becoming more crimsoned than it was before, +and exciting for the moment the attention of her aunt. She, however, +soon permitted it to pass from her thoughts, for she knew the least +emotion generally had that effect. Little did she imagine how those +solitary hours were employed. Little did she think the cause of that +deep blush, or guess the extent of comfort her words had bestowed on her +niece, how they cheered the painful task the orphan believed it her duty +to perform. Spite of many obstacles of failing health, she +perseveringly continued, although as yet she approached not the end of +her desires. No gleam of light yet appeared to say her toil was nearly +over, her wish obtained. + +The limits of our tale, as well as the many histories of individuals +these memoirs of the Hamilton family must embrace, will not permit us to +linger on the scenes of gaiety in which Caroline now mingled, and which +afforded her, perhaps, too many opportunities for the prosecution of her +schemes; Miss Grahame's task was no longer difficult. Her confidence +once given to another, she could not recall to bestow it upon her +mother, from whom, the more she mingled in society, the more she became +estranged; and Annie became at once her confidant and adviser. Eager to +prove she was not the simple-minded being she was believed, Caroline +confided her designs, with regard to St. Eval, to Miss Grahame, who, as +may be supposed, heightened and encouraged them. Had any one pointed out +to Caroline she was acting with duplicity, departing from the line of +truth to which, even in her childhood, in the midst of many other +faults, she had beautifully and strictly adhered, she might have shrunk +back in horror; but where was the harm of a little innocent flirtation? +Annie would repeatedly urge, if she fancied a doubt of the propriety of +such conduct was rising in her friend's mind, and she was ready with +examples of girls of high birth and exemplary virtues who practised it +with impunity: it gave a finish to the character of a woman, proved she +would sometimes act for herself, not always be in leading-strings; it +gave a taste of power, gratified her ambition; in short, flirtation was +the very acme of enjoyment, and gave a decided _ton_ before and after +marriage. + +St. Eval was not sanguine. But it was in vain he tried to resist the +fascinations of the girl he loved, he could not for an instant doubt but +that she encouraged him; he even felt grateful, and loved her more for +those little arts and kindnesses with which she ever endeavoured to draw +him from his reserve, and chain him to her side. Could that noble spirit +imagine she only acted thus to afford herself amusement for the time, +and prove her power to her companions? Could she, the child of Mr. and +Mrs. Hamilton, act otherwise than honourably? We may pardon Lord St. +Eval for believing it impossible, but bitterly was he deceived. Even her +mother, her penetrating, confiding mother, was deceived, and no marvel +then that such should be the case with a comparative stranger. + +Had Caroline's manner been more generally coquettish, Mrs. Hamilton's +eyes might have been opened; but her behaviour in general was such as +rather to diminish than increase those fears which, before her child had +joined the world, had very frequently occupied her anxious heart. To +strangers even, her encouragement of St. Eval might not have been +observable, though it was clearly so to the watchful eyes of her +parents, whose confidence in their daughter's integrity was such as +entirely to exonerate her in their minds from any intention of coquetry. +In this instance, perhaps, their regard for the young Earl himself, and +their mutual but secret wishes might have heightened their belief, that +not only was St. Eval attracted but that Caroline encouraged him, and +feeling this they regretted that Lord Alphingham should continue his +attentions, which Caroline never appeared to receive with any particular +pleasure. + +Anxious as had been Mrs. Hamilton's feelings with regard to the +friendship subsisting between her daughter and Annie Grahame, she little +imagined how painfully the influence of the latter had already tarnished +the character of the former. Few are aware of the danger arising from +those very intimate connections which young women are so fond of +forming. Every mother should study, almost as carefully as those of her +own, the character of her children's intimate friends. Mrs. Hamilton had +done so, and as we know, never approved of Caroline's intimacy with +Annie, but yet she could not check their intercourse while such intimate +friendship existed between her husband and Montrose Grahame. She knew, +too, that the latter felt pleasure in beholding Caroline the chosen +friend of his daughter; and though she could never hope as Grahame did, +that the influence of her child would improve the character of his, she +had yet sufficient confidence in Caroline at one time to believe that +she would still consider her mother her dearest and truest friend, and +thus counteract the effects of Annie's ill-directed eloquence. In this +hope she had already found herself disappointed; but still, though +Caroline refused her sympathy, and bestowed it, as so many other girls +did, on a companion of her own age, she relied perhaps too fondly on +those principles she had so carefully instilled in early life, and +believed that no stain would sully the career of her much-loved child. +If Mrs. Hamilton's affection in this instance completely blinded her, if +she acted too weakly in not at once breaking this closely woven chain of +intimacy, her feelings, when she knew all, were more than sufficient +chastisement. Could the noble, the honourable, the truth-loving mother +for one instant imagine that Caroline, the child whose early years had +caused her so much pain, had called forth so many tearful prayers--the +child whose dawning youth had been so fair, that her heart had nearly +lost its tremblings--that her Caroline should encourage one young man +merely to indulge in love of power, and what was even worse, to thus +conceal her regard for another? Yet it was even so. Caroline really +believed that not only was she an object of passionate love to the +Viscount, but that she returned the sentiment with equal if not +heightened warmth, and, as the undeniable token of true love, she never +mentioned his name except to her confidant. In the first of these +conjectures she was undoubtedly right; as sincerely as a man of his +character could, Lord Alphingham did love Miss Hamilton, and the +fascination of his manner, his insinuating eloquence, and ever ready +flattery, all combined, might well cause this novice in such matters to +believe her heart was really touched; but that it truly was so not only +may we be allowed to doubt, but it appeared that Annie did so also, by +her laborious efforts to fan the newly ignited spark into a name, and +never once permit Caroline to look into herself; and she took so many +opportunities of speaking of those silly, weak-spirited girls, that went +with a tale of love directly to their mothers, and thus very frequently +blighted their hopes and condemned them to broken hearts, by their +duennas' caprices, that Caroline shrunk from the faintest wish to +confide all to her mother, with a sensation amounting almost to fear and +horror. Eminently handsome and accomplished as Lord Alphingham was, +still there was somewhat in his features, or rather their expression, +that did not please, and scarcely satisfied Mrs. Hamilton's penetration. +Intimate as he was with Grahame, friendly as he had become with her +husband, she could not overcome the feeling of repugance with which she +more than once found herself unconsciously regarding him; and she felt +pleased that Mr. Hamilton steadily adhered to his resolution in not +inviting him to his house. To have described what she disliked in him +would have been impossible, it was indefinable; but there was a casual +glance of that dark eye, a curl of that handsome mouth, a momentary +knitting of the brow, that whispered of a mind not inwardly at peace; +that restless passions had found their dwelling-place around his heart. +Mrs. Hamilton only saw him in society: it was uncharitable perhaps to +judge him thus; but the feelings of a mother had rendered her thus +acute, had endowed her with a penetration unusually perceptive, and she +rejoiced that Caroline gave him only the meed of politeness, and that no +sign of encouragement was displayed in her manner towards him. + +That mother's fears were not unfounded. Lord Alphingham loved Caroline, +but the love of a libertine is not true affection, and such a character +for the last fourteen years of his life he had been; nine years of that +time he had lived on the Continent, gay, and courted, in whatever +country he resided, winning many a youthful heart to bid it break, or +lure it on to ruin. It was only the last year he had returned to +England, and as he had generally assumed different names in the various +parts of the Continent he had visited, the adventures of his life were +unknown in the land of his birth, save that they were sometimes +whispered by a few in similar coteries, and then more as conjecture than +reality. So long a time had elapsed, that the wild errors of his youth, +which had been perhaps the original cause of his leaving England, were +entirely forgotten, as if such things had never been, and the Viscount +now found himself quite as much, if not more, an object of universal +attraction in his native land than he had been on the Continent. He was +now about thirty, and perfect indeed in his vocation. The freshness, +_naivete_, and perfect innocence of Caroline had captivated his fancy +perhaps even more than it had ever been before, and her perfect +ignorance of the ways of the fashionable world encouraged him to hope +his conquest of her heart would be very easy. He had found an able +confidant and advocate in Miss Grahame, who had contrived to place +herself with her father's friend on the footing of most friendly +intimacy, and partly by her advice and the suggestions of his own heart +he determined to win the regard of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, before he +openly paid attentions to their daughter. With the former he appeared +very likely to succeed, for the talent he displayed in the House, his +apparently earnest zeal for the welfare of his country, her church and +state, his masterly eloquence, and the interest he felt for Grahame, +were all qualities attractive in the eyes of Mr. Hamilton; and though he +did not yet invite him to his house, he never met him without evincing +pleasure. With Mrs. Hamilton, Alphingham did not find himself so much at +ease, nor fancy he was so secure; courteous she was indeed, but in her +intercourse with him she had unconsciously recalled much of what Grahame +termed the forbidding reserve of years past. In vain he attempted with +her to pass the barriers of universal politeness, and become intimate; +his every advance was repelled coldly, yet not so devoid of courtesy as +to make him suspect she had penetrated his secret character. Still he +persevered in unwavering and marked politeness, although Annie's +representations of Mrs. Hamilton's character had already caused him to +determine in his own mind to make Caroline his wife, with or without her +mother's approval; and he amused himself with believing that, as her +mother was so strict and stern as to keep her children, particularly +Caroline, in such subjection, it would be doing the poor girl a charity +to release her from such thraldom, and introduce her, as his wife, into +scenes far more congenial to her taste, where she would be free from +such keen _surveillance_. In these thoughts he was ably seconded by +Annie, who was constantly pitying Caroline's enslaved situation, and +condemning Mrs. Hamilton's strict severity, declaring it was all +affectation; she was not a degree better than any one else, who did not +make half the fuss about it. Lord Alphingham's resolution was taken, +that before the present season was over, Caroline should be engaged to +him, _nolens volens_ on the part of her parents, and he acted +accordingly. + +As opposite as were the characters, so was the conduct of Caroline's two +noble suitors. St. Eval, spite of the encouragement he received, yet +shrunk from paying any marked attention either to Caroline or her +parents. It was by degrees he became intimate in their family, but +there, perhaps, the only person with whom he felt entirely at ease was +Emmeline, who, rejoicing at Caroline's change of manner, began to hope +her feelings were changing too, and indulged in hopes that one day Lord +St. Eval might really be her brother. Emmeline knew her sister's opinion +of coquetry was very different to hers; but this simple-minded girl +could never have conceived that scheme of duplicity, which, by the aid +and counsel of Annie, Caroline now practised. She scarcely ever saw +Alphingham, and never hearing her sister name him, and being perfectly +unconscious of his attentions when they met, she could not, even in her +unusually acute imagination, believe him St. Eval's rival. More and more +enamoured the young Earl became each time he felt himself an especial +object of Caroline's notice; his heart throbbed and his hopes grew +stronger, still he breathed not one word of love, he dared not. +Diffident of his own attractive qualities, he feared to speak, till he +thought he could be assured of her affections. In the intoxication of +love, he felt her refusal would have more effect upon him than he could +bear. He shrunk from the remarks of the world, and waited yet a little +longer, ere with a trembling heart he should ask that all-important +question. So matters stood in Mr. Hamilton's family during the greater +part of the London season; but as it is not our task to enter into +Caroline's gaieties, we here may be permitted to mention Mrs. Greville's +departure with her delicate and suffering child from the land of their +birth. + +Mr. Greville had made no opposition to their intended plan. Seriously +Mr. Maitland had told him that the life of his child depended on her +residence for some time abroad, in a genial climate and extreme quiet; +but in vain did Mrs. Greville endeavour to believe that affection for +his daughter and herself occasioned this unwonted acquiescence; it was +too clearly to be perceived that he was pleased at their separation from +himself, for it gave him more liberty. She wrote to her son, imploring +him in the most earnest and affectionate manner to return home for the +Easter vacation, that she might see him for a few days before she left +England--perhaps never to return. Ruined from earliest boyhood by weak +indulgence, Alfred Greville felt sometimes a throb of natural feeling +for his mother, though her counsels were of no avail. Touched by the +mournful solemnity and deep affection breathing in every line, he +complied with her request, and spent four or five days peacefully at +home. He appeared shocked at the alteration he found in his sister, and +was kinder than he had previously been in his manner towards her. He had +lately become heir to a fortune and estate, left him by a very old and +distant relative of his father, and it was from this he had determined, +he told his father, to go to Cambridge and cut a dash there with the +best of them. He was now eighteen, and believed himself no +inconsiderable personage, in which belief he was warmly encouraged by +his mistaken father. It was strange that, with such an income, he +permitted the favourite residence of his mother and sister to be +sold--but so it was. The generous feelings of his early childhood had +been completely blunted, and to himself alone he intended to appropriate +that fortune, when a portion would yet have removed many of Mrs. +Greville's anxious fears for the future. Alfred intended, when he was of +age, to be one of the first men of fashion; but he did not consider, +that if he "cut a dash" at college, with the _eclat_ he wished, that +before three years had passed, he would not be much richer than he had +been when the fortune was first left him. + +"Mother, you will drive me from you," he one day exclaimed, in passion, +as she endeavoured to detain him. "If you wish ever to see me, let me +take my own way. Advice I will not brook, and reproach I will not bear; +if you love me, be silent, for I will not be governed." + +"Alfred, I will speak!" replied his almost agonized parent, urged on by +an irresistible impulse. "Child of my love, my prayers! Alfred, I will +not see you go wrong, without one effort, one struggle to guide you in +the right path. Alfred, I leave England--my heart is bursting; for +Mary's sake alone I live, and if she be taken from me, Alfred, we shall +never meet again. My son, oh, if you ever loved me, listen to me now, +they may be the last words you will ever hear from your mother's lips. I +implore, I beseech you to turn from your evil courses, Alfred!" and she +suddenly sunk at his feet, the mother before the son. So devoted, so +fervid was the love with which she regarded him, that had she been told, +that to lure him to virtue her own life must be the forfeit, willingly +at that moment would she have died. She continued with an eloquence of +such beseeching tenderness, it would have seemed none could have heard +it unmoved. "Alfred, your mother kneels to you, your own mother. Oh, +hear her; do not condemn her to wretchedness. Let me not suffer more. +You have sought temptation; oh, fly from it; seek the companionship of +those who will lead you to honour, not to vice. Break from those +connections you have weaved around you. Turn again to the God you have +deserted. Oh, do not live as you have done; think on the responsibility +each year increases. My child, my beloved, in mercy refuse not your +mother's prayer! reject not my advice, Alfred! Alfred!" and she clung to +him, while her voice became hoarse with intense anguish. "Oh, promise me +to turn from your present life. Promise me to think on my words, to +seek the footstool of mercy, and return again to Him who has not +forsaken you. Promise me to live a better life; say you will be your +mother's comfort, not her misery--her blessing, not her curse. My child, +my child, be merciful!" Longer, more imploring still would she have +pleaded, but voice failed, and it was only on those chiselled features +the agony of the soul could have been discovered. Alfred gazed on her +thus kneeling at his feet--his mother, she, who in his infancy had knelt +beside him, to guide on high his childish prayers. The heart of the +misguided boy was softened, tears filled his eyes. He would have spoken; +he would have pledged himself to do all that she had asked, when +suddenly the ridicule of his companions flashed before his fancy. Could +he bear that? No; he could see his mother at his feet, but he could not +meet the ridicule of the world. He raised her hastily, but in perfect +silence; pressed her to his heart, kissed her cheek repeatedly, then +placed her on a couch, and darted from her presence. He had said no +word, he had given no sign; and for several hours that mother could not +overcome internal wretchedness so far even as to join her Mary. He +returned to Cambridge. They parted in affection; seldom had the reckless +boy evinced so much emotion as he did when he bade farewell to his +mother and sister. He folded Mary to his bosom, and implored her, in a +voice almost inaudible, to take care of her own health for the sake of +their mother; but when she entreated him to come and see them in their +new abode as soon as he could, he answered not. Yet that emotion had +left a balm on the torn heart of his mother. She fancied her son, +wayward as he was, yet loved her; and though she dared not look forward +to his reformation, still, to feel he loved her--oh, if fresh zeal were +required in her prayers, that knowledge gave it. + +The first week in May they left Greville Manor. Still weak and +suffering, the struggle to conceal and subdue all she felt at leaving, +as she thought for ever, the house of her infancy, of her girlhood, her +youth, was almost too much for poor Mary; and her mother more than once +believed she would not reach in life the land they were about to seek. +The sea breezes, for they travelled whenever they could along the shore, +in a degree nerved her; and by the time they reached Dover, ten days +after they had left the Manor, she had rallied sufficiently to ease the +sorrowing heart of her mother of a portion of its burden. + +They arrived at Dover late in the evening, and early the following day, +as Mary sat by the large window of the hotel, watching with some +appearance of interest the bustling scene before her, a travelling +carriage passed rapidly by and stopped at the entrance. She knew the +livery, and her heart throbbed almost to suffocation, as it whispered +that Mr. Hamilton would not come alone. + +"Mother, Mr. Hamilton has arrived," she succeeded at length in saying. +"And Emmeline--is it, can it be?" But she had no more time to wonder, +for ere she had recovered the agitation the sight of one other of Mr. +Hamilton's family had occasioned, they were in the room, and Emmeline +springing forward, had flung herself on Mary's neck; and utterly unable +to control her feelings at the change she beheld in her friend, wept +passionately on her shoulder. Powerfully agitated, Mary felt her +strength was failing, and had it not been for Mr. Hamilton's support, +she would have fallen to the ground. He supported her with a father's +tenderness to the couch, and reproachfully demanded of Emmeline if she +had entirely forgotten her promise of composure. + +"Do not reprove her, my dear friend," said Mrs. Greville, as she drew +the weeping girl affectionately to her. "My poor Mary is so quickly +agitated now, that the pleasure of seeing three instead of one of our +dear-valued friends has been sufficient of itself to produce this +agitation. And you, too, Herbert," she continued, extending her hand to +the young man, who hastily raised it to his lips, as if to conceal an +emotion which had paled his cheek, almost as a kindred feeling had done +with Mary's. "Have you deserted your favourite pursuits, and left Oxford +at such a busy time, merely to see us before we leave? This is kind, +indeed." + +"I left Percy to work for me," answered Herbert, endeavouring to hide +emotion under the veil of gaiety. "As to permit you to leave England +without once more seeing you, and having one more smile from Mary, I +would not, even had the whole honour of my college been at stake. You +must not imagine me so entirely devoted to my hooks, dear Mrs. Greville, +as to believe I possess neither time nor inclination for the gentler +feelings of human nature." + +"I know you too well, and have known you too long, to imagine that," +replied Mrs. Greville, earnestly. "And is Mary so completely to engross +your attention, Emmeline," she added, turning towards the couch where +the friends sat, "that I am not to hear a word of your dear mother, +Caroline, or Ellen? Indeed, I cannot allow that." + +The remark quickly produced a general conversation, and Herbert for the +first time addressed Mary. A strange, unconquerable emotion had chained +his tongue as he beheld her; but now, with eager yet respectful +tenderness, he inquired after her health, and how she had borne their +long journey, and other questions, trifling in themselves, but uttered +in a tone that thrilled the young heart of her he addressed. + +Herbert knew not how intimately the image of Mary Greville had mingled +with his most secret thoughts, even in his moments of grave study and +earnest application, until he heard she was about to leave England. +Sorrow, disappointment, scarcely defined but bitterly painful, then +occupied his mind, and the knowledge burst with dazzling clearness on +his heart that he loved her; so deeply, so devotedly, that even were +every other wish fulfilled, life, without her, would be a blank. He had +deemed himself so lifted above all earthly feelings, that even were he +to be deprived as Mr. Morton of every natural relation, he could in time +reconcile himself to the will of his Maker, and in the discharge of +ministerial duties be happy. He had fancied his heart was full of the +love of God alone, blessed in that, however changed his earthly lot. +Suddenly he was awakened from his illusion: now in the hour of +separation he knew an earthly idol; he discovered that he was not so +completely the servant of his Maker as he had hoped, and sometimes +believed. But in the doubts and fears which shadowed his exalted mind, +he sought the footstool of his God. His cry for assistance was not +unheeded. Peace and comfort rested on his heart. A cloud was lifted +from his eyes, and for the knowledge of his virtuous love he blessed his +God; feeling thus supported he could guide and control himself according +to the dictates of piety. He knew well the character of Mary; he felt +assured that, if in after years he were permitted to make her his own, +she would indeed become his helpmate in all things, more particularly in +those which related to his God and to his holy duties among men. He +thought on the sympathy that existed between them--he remembered the +lighting up of that soft, dark eye, the flushing cheek, the smile of +pleasure that ever welcomed him, and fondly his heart whispered that he +need not doubt her love. Three years, or nearly four must elapse ere he +could feel at liberty to marry; not till he beheld himself a minister of +God. Yet interminable as to his imagination the intervening years +appeared, still there was no trembling in his trusting heart. If his +Father on high ordained them for each other, it mattered not how long +the time that must elapse, and if for some wise purpose his wishes were +delayed, he recognised the hand of God, and saw "that it was good." + +Yet Herbert could not resist the impulse to behold Mary once more ere +she quitted England to explain to her his feelings; to understand each +other. He knew the day his father intended going to Dover, and the +evening previous, much to the astonishment of his family, made his +appearance amongst them. All expressed pleasure at his intention but +one, and that one understood not why; but when she heard the cause of +his unexpected visit, a sudden and indefinable pang shot through her +young heart, dimming at once the joy with which the sight of him had +filled it. She knew not, guessed not why, when she laid her head on her +pillow that night, she wept so bitterly. The source of those secret and +silent tears she could not trace, she only knew their cause was one of +sorrow, and yet she loved Mary. + +The pleading earnestness of Emmeline had, after some little difficulty, +obtained the consent of her mother to her accompanying her father and +brother, on condition, however, of her not agitating Mary by any +unconstrained display of sorrow. It was only at their first meeting this +condition had been forgotten. Mary looked so pale, so thin, so different +even to when they parted, that the warm heart of Emmeline could not be +restrained, for she knew, however resignation might be, nay, was felt, +it was a bitter pang to that gentle girl to leave her native land, and +the friends she so much loved; but recalling her promise, with a strong +effort she checked her own sorrow, and endeavoured with playful fondness +to raise the spirits of her friend. + +The day passed cheerfully, the young people took a drive for some few +miles in the vicinity of Dover, while Mr. Hamilton, acting the part of a +brother to the favourite _protegee_ of his much-loved mother, listened +to her plans, counselled and improved them, and, indeed, on many points +proved himself such a true friend, that when Mrs. Greville retired to +rest that night, she felt more at ease in mind than for many months she +had been. + +The following day was employed in seeing the antiquities of Dover, its +ancient castle among the first, and with Mr. Hamilton as a cicerone, it +was a day of pleasure to all, though, perhaps, a degree of melancholy +might have pervaded the party in the evening, for the recollection would +come, that by noon on the morrow, Mrs. Greville and Mary would bid them +farewell. In vain during that day had Herbert sought for an opportunity +to speak with Mary on the subject nearest his heart, though they had +been so happy together; when for a few minutes they found themselves +alone, he had fancied there was more than usual reserve in Mary's +manner, which checked the words upon his lip. Some hours he lay awake +that night. Should he write his hopes and wishes? No: he would hear the +answer from her own lips, and the next morning an opportunity appeared +to present itself. + +The vessel did not leave Dover till an hour before noon, and breakfast +having been despatched by half-past nine, Mrs. Greville persuaded her +daughter to take a gentle walk in the intervening time. Herbert +instantly offered to escort her. Emmeline remained to assist Mrs. +Greville in some travelling arrangements, and Mr. Hamilton employed +himself in some of those numberless little offices which active men take +upon themselves in the business of a departure. Mary shrunk with such +evident reluctance from this arrangement, that for the first time +Herbert doubted. + +"You were not wont to shrink thus from accepting me as your companion," +he said, fixing his large expressive eyes mournfully upon her, and +speaking in a tone of such melancholy sweetness, that Mary hastily +struggled to conceal the tear that started to her eye. "Are our happy +days of childhood indeed thus forgotten?" he continued, gently. "Go with +me, dear Mary; let us in fancy transport ourselves at least for one +hour back to those happy years of early life which will not come again." + +The thoughts, the hopes, the joys of her childhood flashed with sudden +power through the heart of Mary as he spoke, and she resisted them not. + +"Forgive me, Herbert," she said, hastily rising to prepare; "I have +become a strange and wayward being the last few months; you must bear +with me, for the sake of former days." + +Playfully he granted the desired forgiveness, and they departed on their +walk. For some little time they walked in silence. Before they were +aware of it, a gentle ascent conducted them to a spot, not only lovely +in its own richness, but in the extensive view that stretched beneath +them. The wide ocean lay slumbering at their feet; the brilliant rays of +the sun, which it reflected as a mirror, appeared to lull it to rest, +the very waves broke softly on the shore. To the left extended the +snow-white cliffs, throwing in shadow part of the ocean, and bringing +forward their own illumined walls in bold relief against the dark blue +sea. Ships of every size, from the floating castle in the offing to the +tiny pleasure boat, whose white sails shining in the sun caused her to +be distinguished at some distance, skimming along the ocean as a bird of +snowy plumage across the heavens, the merchant vessels, the packets +entering and departing, even the blackened colliers, added interest to +the scene; for at the distance Herbert and Mary stood, no confusion was +heard to disturb the moving picture. On their right the beautiful +country peculiar to Kent spread out before them in graceful undulations +of hill and valley, hop-ground and meadow, wherein the sweet fragrance +of the newly-mown grass was wafted at intervals to the spot where they +stood. Wild flowers of various kinds were around them; the hawthorn +appearing like a tree of snow in the centre of a dark green hedge; the +modest primrose and the hidden violet yet lingered, as if loth to +depart, though their brethren of the summer had already put forth their +budding blossoms. A newly-severed trunk of an aged tree invited them to +sit and rest, and the most tasteful art could not have placed a rustic +seat in a more lovely scene. + +Long and painfully did Mary gaze around her, as if she would engrave +within her heart every scene of the land she was so soon to leave. + +"Herbert," she said, at length, "I never wished to gaze on futurity +before, but now, oh, I would give much to know if indeed I shall ever +gaze on these scenes again. Could I but think I might return to them, +the pang of leaving would lose one half its bitterness. I know this is a +weak and perhaps sinful feeling; but in vain I have lately striven to +bow resignedly to my Maker's will, even should His call meet me, as I +sometimes fear it will, in a foreign land, apart from all, save one, +whom I love on earth." + +"Do not, do not think so, dearest Mary. True, indeed, there is no +parting without its fears, even for a week, a day, an hour. Death ever +hovers near us, to descend when least expected. But oh, for my sake, +Mary, dear Mary, talk not of dying in a foreign land. God's will is +best, His decree is love; I know, I feel it, and on this subject from +our infancy we have felt alike; to you alone have I felt that I dared +breathe the holy aspirations sometimes my own. I am not wont to be +sanguine, but somewhat whispers within me you will return--these scenes +behold again." + +Mary gazed on her young companion, he had spoken with unwonted +animation, and his mild eye rested with trusting fondness upon her; she +dared not meet it; her pale cheek suddenly became crimson, but with an +effort she replied-- + +"Buoy me not up with vain hopes, Herbert; it is better, perhaps, that I +should never look to my return, for hope might descend to vain wishes, +and wishes to repinings, which must not be. I shall look on other scenes +of loveliness, and though in them perhaps no fond association of earth +may be mingled, yet there is one of which no change of country can +deprive me, one association that from scenes as these can never never +fly. The friends of my youth will be no longer near me, strangers alone +will surround me; but even as the hand of my Heavenly Father is marked +in every scene, however far apart, so is that hand, that love extended +to me wherever I may dwell. Oh, that my heart may indeed be filled with +the love of Him." + +There was a brief silence. The countenance of Herbert had been for a +moment troubled, but after a few seconds resumed its serenity, +heightened by the fervid feelings of his heart. + +"Mary," he said, taking her passive hand in his, "if I am too bold in +speaking all I wish, forgive me. You know not how I have longed for one +moment of unchecked confidence before you left England, it is now before +me, and, oh, listen to me, dearest Mary, with that kindness you have +ever shown. I need not remind you of our days of childhood and early +youth; I need not recall the mutual sympathy which, in every feeling, +hope, joy, or sorrow, has been our own. We have grown together, played +together in infancy; read, thought, and often in secret prayed together +in youth. To you I have ever imparted my heartfelt wishes, earnest +prayers for my future life, to become a worthy servant of my God, and +lead others in his path, and yet, frail mortal as I am, I feel, even if +these wishes are fulfilled, there will yet, dearest Mary, remain a void +within my heart. May I, may I, indeed, behold in the playmate of my +infancy a friend in manhood, the partner of my life--my own Mary as my +assistant in labours of love? I am agitating you, dearest girl, forgive +me; only give me some little hope. Years must elapse ere that blessed +moment can arrive, perhaps I have been wrong to urge it now, but I could +not part from you without one word to explain my feelings, to implore +your ever-granted sympathy." + +The hand of Mary trembled in his grasp. She had turned from his pleading +glance, but when he ceased, she raised her head and struggled to speak. +A smile, beautiful, holy in its beauty, appeared struggling with tears, +and a faint flush had risen to her cheek, but voice she had none, and +for one moment she concealed her face on his shoulder. She withdrew not +her hand from his, and Herbert felt--oh, how gratefully--that his love +was returned; he had not hoped in vain. For some minutes they could not +speak, every feeling was in common; together they had grown, together +loved, and now that the magic word had been spoken, what need was there +for reserve? none; and reserve was banished. No darkening clouds were +then perceived; at that moment Mary thought not of her father, and if +she did, could she believe that his consent to an union with a son of +Mr. Hamilton would be difficult to obtain. Marry they could not yet, and +perhaps the unalloyed bliss of that hour might have originated in the +fact that they thought only of the present--the blessed knowledge that +they loved each other, were mutually beloved. + +The happiness glowing on Mary's expressive countenance as she entered +could not fail to attract the watchful eye of her mother, and almost +unconsciously, and certainly indefinably, her own bosom reflected the +pleasure of her child, and the pang of quitting England was partially +eased of its bitterness. Yet still it was a sorrowful moment when the +time of separation actually came. Their friends had gone on board with +them, and remained till the signal for departure was given. Mary had +preferred the cabin to the confusion on deck, and there her friends left +her. In the sorrow of that moment Emmeline's promise of composure was +again forgotten; she clung weeping to Mary's neck, till her father, with +gentle persuasion, drew her away, and almost carried her on deck. +Herbert yet lingered; they were alone in the cabin, the confusion +attendant on a departure preventing all fear of intruders. He clasped +Mary to his heart, in one long passionate embrace, then hastily placing +the trembling girl in the arms of her mother, he murmured almost +inaudibly-- + +"Mrs. Greville, dearest Mrs. Greville, guard, oh, guard her for me, she +will be mine; she will return to bless me, when I may claim and can +cherish her as my wife. Talk to her of me; let not the name of Herbert +be prohibited between you. I must not stay, yet one word more, Mrs. +Greville--say, oh, say you will not refuse me as your son, if three +years hence Mary will still be mine. Say your blessing will hallow our +union; and oh, I feel it will then indeed be blessed!" + +Overpowered with sudden surprise and unexpected joy, Mrs. Greville gazed +for a moment speechlessly on the noble youth before her, and vainly the +mother struggled to speak at this confirmation of her long-cherished +hopes and wishes. + +"Mother," murmured Mary, alarmed at her silence, and burying her face in +her bosom, "mother, will you not speak, will you not bid us hope?" + +"God in Heaven bless you, my children!" she at length exclaimed, +bursting into tears of heartfelt gratitude and joy. "It was joy, joy," +she repeated, struggling for composure; "I expected not this blessing. +Yes, Herbert, we will speak of you, think of you, doubt us not, my son, +my dear son. A mother's protecting care and soothing love will guard +your Mary. She is not only her mother's treasure now. Go, my beloved +Herbert, you are summoned; farewell, and God bless you!" + +Herbert did not linger with his father and sister; a few minutes private +interview with the former caused his most sanguine hopes to become yet +stronger, then travelling post to London, where he only remained a few +hours, returned with all haste to his college. In his rapid journey, +however, he had changed his mind with regard to keeping what had passed +between himself and Mary a secret from his mother, whom he yet loved +with perhaps even more confiding fondness than in his boyhood. He saw +her alone; imparted to her briefly but earnestly all that had passed, +implored her to promise consent, and preserve his confidence even from +his brothers and sisters; as so long a time must elapse ere they could +indeed be united, that he dreaded their engagement being known. + +"Even the good wishes of the dear members of home," he said, "would +sound, I fear, but harshly on my ear. I cannot define why I do not wish +it known even to those I love; yet, dearest mother, indulge me. The +events of one day are hidden from us; how dark then must be those of +three years. No plighted promise has passed between us; it is but the +confidence of mutual love; and that--oh, mother, I could not bear it +torn from the recesses of my own breast to be a subject of conversation +even to those dearest to me." + +His mother looked on the glowing countenance of her son; on him, who +from, his birth had never by his conduct given her one single moment of +care, and had she even disapproved of his secrecy, all he asked would +have been granted him; but she approved of his resolution, and emotion +glistened in her eye, as she said-- + +"My Herbert, if I had been privileged to select one among my young +friends to be your wife, my choice would have fallen, without one +moment's hesitation, on Mary Greville. She, amid them all, I deem most +worthy to be the partner of my son. May Heaven in mercy spare you to +each other!" + +Herbert returned to college, and resumed his studies with even greater +earnestness than, before. His unrestrained confidence had been as balm +to his mother's heart, and soothed the bitter pain it was to behold, to +feel assured, for it was no longer fancy, that the confidence of +Caroline was indeed utterly denied her and bestowed upon another. Yet +still Mrs. Hamilton fancied Caroline loved St. Eval; her eyes had not +yet been opened to the enormity of her daughter's conduct. Nor were they +till, after a long struggle of fervid love with the tremblings natural +to a fond but reserved and lowly heart, St. Eval summoned courage to +offer hand, heart, and fortune to the girl he loved (he might well be +pardoned for the belief that she loved him), and was rejected, coldly, +decidedly. + +The young Earl had received the glad sanction of Mr. Hamilton to make +his proposals to his daughter. There had never been, nor was there now, +anything to damp his hopes. He was not, could not be deceived in the +belief that Caroline accepted, nay, demanded, encouraged his attention. +Invariably kind, almost fascinating in her manner, she had ever singled +him out from the midst of many much gayer and more attractive young men. +She had given him somewhat more to love each time they parted; and what +could this mean, but that she cared for him more than for others? Again +and again St. Eval pondered on the encouragement he could not doubt but +that he received; again and again demanded of himself if he were not +playing with her feelings thus to defer his proposals. Surely she loved +him. The sanction of her parents had heightened his hopes, and love and +confidence in the truth, the purity of his beloved one obtained so much +ascendancy over his heart, that when the important words were said, he +had almost ceased to fear. How bitter, how agonizing then must have been +his disappointment when he was refused--when sudden haughtiness beamed +on Caroline's noble brow, and coldness spread over every feature. And +yet, could he doubt it? No; triumph was glittering in her sparkling eye; +in vain he looked for sympathy in his disappointment, if love were +denied him. He gazed on her, and the truth suddenly flashed on his mind; +he marked the triumph with which she heard his offer; no softening +emotion was in her countenance. In vain he tried to ascribe its +expression to some other feeling; it was triumph, he could not be +deceived; and with agony St. Eval discovered that the being he had +almost worshipped was not the faultless creature he had believed her; +she had played with his feelings; she had encouraged him, heightened his +love, merely to afford herself amusement. The visions of hope, of fancy +were rudely dispelled, and perhaps at that moment it was better for his +peace that he suddenly felt she was beneath his love; she was not worthy +to be his wife. He no longer esteemed; and if love itself were not +utterly snapped asunder, the loss of esteem enabled him to act in that +interview with pride approaching to her own. He reproached her not: no +word did he utter that could prove how deeply he was wounded, and thus +add to the triumph so plain to be perceived. That she had sunk in his +estimation she might have seen, but other feelings prevented her +discovering how deeply. Had she veiled her manner more, had she rejected +him with kindness, St. Eval might still have loved, and imagined that +friendship and esteem had actuated her conduct towards him. Yet those +haughty features expelled this thought as soon as it arose. It was on +the night of a gay assembly St. Eval had found an opportunity to speak +with Caroline, and when both rejoined the gay crowd no emotion was +discernible in the countenance of either. St. Eval was the same to all +as usual. No one who might have heard his eloquent discussion on some +state affairs with the Russian consul could have imagined how painfully +acute were his sufferings; it was not only disappointed love--no, his +was aggravated bitterness; he could no longer esteem the object of his +love, he had found himself deceived, cruelly deceived, in one he had +looked on almost as faultless; and where is the pang that can equal one +like this? The heightened colour on Caroline's cheek, the increased +brilliancy of her eye, attracted the admiration of all around her, the +triumph of power had indeed been achieved. But when she laid her head on +her pillow, when the silence and darkness of night brought the past to +her mind more vividly, in vain she sought forgetfulness in sleep. Was it +happiness, triumph, that bade her bury her face in her hands and weep, +weep till almost every limb became convulsed by her overpowering +emotion? Her thoughts were undefined, but so painful, that she was +glad--how glad when morning came. She compared her present with her +former self, and the contrast was misery; but even as her ill-fated aunt +had done, she summoned pride to stifle every feeding of remorse. + +Mr. Hamilton had given his sanction to the addresses of Lord St. Eval to +his daughter; but he knew not when, the young man intended to place the +seal upon his fate. Great then was his astonishment, the morning +following the evening we have mentioned, when St. Eval called to bid him +farewell, as he intended, he said, leaving London that afternoon for his +father's seat, where he should remain perhaps a week, and then quit +England for the Continent. He spoke calmly, but there was a paleness of +the cheek, a dimness of the eye, that told a tale of inward +wretchedness, which the regard of Mr. Hamilton could not fail instantly +to discover. Deeply had he become interested in the young man, and the +quick instinct combined with the fears of a father, told him that the +conduct of Caroline had caused this change. He looked at the expressive +countenance of the young Earl for a few minutes, then placing his hand +on his shoulder, said kindly, but impressively-- + +"St. Eval, you are changed, as well as your plans. You are unhappy. What +has happened? Have your too sensitive feelings caused you to fancy +Caroline unkind?" + +"Would to heaven it were only fancy!" replied St. Eval, with unwonted +emotion, and almost convulsively clenching both hands as if for +calmness, added more composedly, "I have been too presumptuous in my +hopes; I fancied myself beloved by your beautiful daughter, but I have +found myself painfully mistaken." + +Sternness gathered on the brow of the father as he heard, and he +answered, with painful emphasis-- + +"St. Eval, deceive me not, I charge you. In what position do you now +stand with Caroline?" + +"Briefly, then, if I must speak, in the humble character of a rejected, +scornfully rejected lover." His feelings carried him beyond control. The +triumph he had seen glittering so brightly in the eyes of Caroline had +for the time turned every emotion into gall. He shrunk from the agony it +was to find he was deceived in one whom he had believed so perfect. + +"Scorn! has a daughter of mine acted thus? Encourage, and then scorn. +St. Eval, for pity's sake, tell me! you are jesting; it is not of +Caroline you speak." So spoke the now agonized father, for every hope of +his child's singleness of mind and purity of intention appeared at once +blighted. He grasped St. Eval's hand, and looked on him with eyes from +which, in the deep disappointment of his heart, all sternness had fled. + +"I grieve to cause you pain, my dear friend," replied the young Earl, +entering at once into the father's feelings, "but it is even so. Your +daughter has only acted as many, nay, as the majority of her sex are +fond of doing. It appears that you, too, have marked what might be +termed the encouragement she gave me. My self-love is soothed, for I +might otherwise have deemed my hopes were built on the unstable +foundation of folly and presumption." + +"And condemnation of my child is the fruit of your self-acquittal, St. +Eval, is it not? You despise her now as much as you have loved her," and +Mr. Hamilton paced the room with agitation. + +"Would almost that I could!" exclaimed St. Eval; the young Earl then +added, despondingly, "no, I deny not that your child has sunk in my +estimation; I believed her exalted far above the majority of her sex; +that she, apparently all softness and truth, was incapable of playing +with the most sacred feelings of a fellow-creature. I looked on her as +faultless; and though the veil has fallen from my eyes, it tells me that +if in Caroline Hamilton I am deceived, it is useless to look for +perfection upon earth. Yet I cannot tear her image from my heart. She +has planted misery there which I cannot at present overcome; but if that +triumph yields her pleasure, and tends to her happiness, be it so; my +farther attention shall no longer annoy her." + +Much disturbed, Mr. Hamilton continued to pace the room, then hastily +approaching the young Earl, he said, hurriedly-- + +"Forget her, St. Eval, forget her; rest not till you have regained your +peace. My disappointment, that of her mother--our long-cherished hopes, +but it is useless to speak of them, to bring them forward, bitter as +they are, in comparison with yours. Forget her, St. Eval; she is +unworthy of you," and he wrung his hand again and again, as if in that +pressure he could conquer and conceal his feelings. At that instant +Emmeline bounded joyfully into the room, unconscious that any one was +with her father, and only longing to tell him the delightful news that +she had received a long, long letter from Mary, telling her of their +safe arrival at Geneva, at which place Mrs. Greville intended to remain +for a few weeks, before she proceeded more southward. + +"Look, dear papa, is not this worth receiving?" she exclaimed, holding +up the well-filled letter, and looking the personification of innocent +and radiant happiness, her fair luxuriant hair pushed in disorder from +her open forehead and flushed cheek, her blue eyes sparkling with +irresistible glee, which was greatly heightened by her glowing smiles. +It was impossible to look on Emmeline without feeling every ruffled +emotion suddenly calmed; she was so bright, so innocent, so fair a +thing, that if peace and kindness had wished to take up their abode on +earth, they could not have found a fairer form wherein to dwell. As St. +Eval gazed upon the animated girl, he could not help contrasting her +innocent and light-hearted pleasure with his own unmitigated sorrow. + +"Your presence and your joy are mistimed, my dear Emmeline; your father +appears engaged," said Mrs. Hamilton, entering almost directly after her +child, and perceiving by one glance at her husband's face that +something had chanced to disturb him. "Control these wild spirits for a +time till he is able to listen to you." + +"Do not check her, my dear Emmeline, I am not particularly engaged. If +St. Eval will forgive me, I would gladly hear some news of our dear +Mary." + +"And pray let me hear it also. You know how interested I am in this dear +friend of yours, Emmeline," replied St. Eval, struggling with himself, +and succeeding sufficiently to speak playfully; for he and Emmeline had +contrived to become such great allies and intimate friends, that by some +sympathy titles of ceremony were seldom used between them, and they were +Eugene and Emmeline to each other, as if they were indeed brother and +sister. + +Laughingly and delightedly Emmeline imparted the contents of her letter, +which afforded real pleasure both to Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, by the more +cheerful, even happier style in which she had written. + +"Now do you not think I ought to be proud of my friend, Master Eugene? +is she not one worth having?" demanded Emmeline, sportively appealing to +the young Earl, as she read to her father some of Mary's affectionate +expressions and wishes in the conclusion. + +"So much so, that I am seized with an uncontrollable desire to know her, +and if you will only give me a letter of introduction, I will set off +for Geneva next week." + +Emmeline raised her laughing eyes to his face, with an expression of +unfeigned amazement. + +"A most probable circumstance," she said, laughing; "no, Lord St. Eval, +you will not impose thus on my credulity. Eugene St. Eval, the most +courted, flattered, and distinguished, leave London before the season +is over--impossible." + +"I thank you for the pretty compliments you are showering on me, my +little fairy friend, but it is nevertheless true. I leave England for +the Continent next week, and I may as well bend my wandering steps to +Geneva as elsewhere." + +"But what can you possibly be going on the Continent again for? I am +sure, by all the anecdotes you have told me, you must have seen all that +is worth seeing, and so why should poor England again be deserted by one +of the ablest of her sons?" + +"Emmeline!" exclaimed her mother, in an accent of warning and reproach, +which brought a deep crimson flush to her cheek, and caused her eyes to +glisten, for Mrs. Hamilton had marked that all was not serene on the +countenance of the Earl, and her heart beat with anxious alarm; for she +knew his intentions with regard to Caroline, and all she beheld and +heard, startled, almost terrified her. Lord St. Eval certainly looked a +little disturbed at Emmeline's continued questions, and perceiving it, +she hesitatingly but frankly said-- + +"I really beg your pardon, my lord, for my unjustifiable curiosity; +mamma is always reproving me for it, and certainly I deserve her lecture +now. But will you really find out Mary, and be the bearer of a small +parcel for me?" + +"With the greatest pleasure; for it will give me an object, which I had +not before, and a most pleasing one, if I may hope your friend will not +object to my intrusion." + +"A friend of mine will ever be warmly welcomed by Mary," said Emmeline, +with eagerness, but checking herself. + +"Then may I hope you will continue to regard me as your friend, and +still speak of me as Eugene, though perhaps a year or more may pass +before you see me again?" demanded the young Earl, somewhat sadly, +glancing towards Mrs. Hamilton, as if for her approval. + +"As my brother Eugene--yes," answered Emmeline, quickly, and perhaps +archly. A shadow passed over his brow. + +"As your _friend_" he repeated, laying an emphasis on the word, which to +any one less innocent of the world than Emmeline, would at once have +excited their suspicion, and which single word at once told Mrs. +Hamilton that all her cherished hopes were blighted. She read +confirmation in her husband's countenance, and for a few minutes stood +bewildered. + +"I leave town in a few hours for my father's seat," added St. Eval, +turning to Mrs. Hamilton. "I may amuse myself by taking Devonshire in my +way, or rather going out of my way for that purpose. Have you any +commands at Oakwood that I can perform?" + +Mrs. Hamilton answered thankfully in the negative, but Emmeline +exclaimed-- + +"I have a good mind to make you bearer of a letter and a _gage d'amour_ +to my good old nurse; she will be so delighted to hear of me, and her +postman a nobleman. Poor nurse will have food for conversation and +pleasurable reflection till we return." + +"Anything you like, only make me of use; and let me have it in an hour's +time, or perhaps I can give you two." + +"One will be all-sufficient; but what a wonderful desire to be useful +has seized you all in a minute," replied Emmeline, whose high spirits +appeared on that day utterly uncontrollable, and she ran on unmindful of +her mother's glance. "But if I really do this, I must bid you farewell +at once, or I shall have no time. Think of me, if anything extraordinary +meets your eye, or occurs to you, and treasure it up for my information, +as you know my taste for the marvellous. My letter to Mary shall be +forwarded to you, for I really depend on your seeking her, and telling +her all about us; and now, then, with every wish for your pleasant +journey, I must wish you good-bye." + +"Good-bye, dear, happy Emmeline," he said, with earnestness. "May you be +as light-hearted and joyous, and as kind, when we meet again as now; may +I commission you with my warmest remembrances and kind adieus to your +cousin, whom I am sorry I have not chanced to see this morning?" + +"They shall be duly delivered," answered Emmeline, and kissing her hand +gaily in adieu, she tripped lightly out of the room, and St. Eval +instantly turned towards Mrs. Hamilton. + +"In this intention of leaving England for a few months, or perhaps a +year," he said, striving for calmness, but speaking in a tone of +sadness, "you will at once perceive that my cherished hopes for the +future are blighted. I will not linger on the subject, for I cannot yet +bear disappointment such as this with composure. Were I of different +mould, I might, spite of coldness and pride, continue my addresses; and +were you as other parents are, Caroline--Miss Hamilton might still be +mine; a fashionable marriage it would still be, but, thank God, such +will not be; even to bestow your child on one you might value more than +me, you would not trample on her affections, you would not consent that +she should be an unwilling bride, and I--oh! I could not--could not wed +with one who loved me not. My dream of happiness has ended--been +painfully dispelled; the blow was unexpected, and has found me +unprepared. I leave England, lest my ungoverned feelings should lead me +wrong. Mrs. Hamilton," he continued, more vehemently, "you understand my +peculiar feelings, and can well guess the tortures I am now enduring. +You know why I am reserved, because I dread the outbreak of emotion even +in the most trifling circumstances. Oh, to have been your son--" he +paused abruptly, and hurriedly paced the room. "Forgive me," he said, +more calmly. "Only say you approve of my resolution to seek change for a +short time, till I obtain self-government, and can behold her without +pain; say that I am doing right for myself. I cannot think." + +"You are right, quite right," replied Mrs. Hamilton instantly, and her +husband confirmed her words. "I do approve your resolution, though +deeply, most deeply, I regret its cause, St. Eval. Your disappointment +is most bitter, but you grieve not alone. To have given Caroline to you, +to behold her your wife, would have fulfilled every fervent wish of +which she is the object. Not you alone have been deceived; her conduct +has been such as to mislead those who have known her from childhood. St. +Eval, she is not worthy of you." + +Disappointed, not only at the blighting of every secret hope, not those +alone in which St. Eval was concerned, but every fond thought she had +indulged in the purity and integrity of her child, in which, though her +confidence had been given to another, she had still implicitly trusted, +the most bitter disappointment and natural displeasure filled that +mother's heart, and almost for the first time since their union Mr. +Hamilton could read this unwonted emotion, in one usually so gentle, in +her kindling eyes and agitated voice. + +"Child of my heart, my hopes, my care, as she is, I must yet speak it, +forget her, Eugene; let not the thought of a deceiver, a coquette, debar +you from the possession of that peace which should ever be the portion +of one so truly honourable, so wholly estimable as yourself. You are +disappointed, pained; but you know not--cannot guess the agony it is to +find the integrity in which I so fondly trusted is as naught; that my +child, my own child, whom I had hoped to lead through life without a +stain, is capable of such conduct." + +Emotion choked her voice. She had been carried on by the violence of her +feelings, and perhaps said more in that moment of excitement than she +either wished or intended. + +St. Eval gazed on the noble woman before him with unfeigned admiration. +He saw the indignation, the displeasure which she felt; it heightened +the dignity of her character in his estimation; but he now began to +tremble for its effects upon her child. + +"Do not, my dear Mrs. Hamilton," he said, with some hesitation, "permit +Miss Hamilton's rejection of me to excite your displeasure towards her. +If with me she could not be happy, she was right to refuse my hand. Let +me not have the misery of feeling I have caused dissension in a family +whose beautiful unity has ever bound me to it. Surely you would not urge +the affections of your child." + +"Never," replied Mrs. Hamilton, earnestly. "I understand your fears, +but let them pass away. I shall urge nothing, but my duty I must do. +Much as I admire the exalted sentiments you express, I must equally +deplore the mistaken conduct of my child. She has wilfully sported with +the most sacred of human feelings. Once more I say, she is not worthy to +be yours." + +The indignation and strong emotion still lingering in her voice +convinced St. Eval that he might urge no more. Respectfully he took his +leave. + + + + +CHAPTER V. + + +Mrs. Hamilton sat silently revolving in her mind all Caroline's late +conduct, but vainly endeavouring to discover one single good reason to +justify her rejection of St. Eval. In vain striving to believe all must +have been mistaken, she had not given him encouragement. That her +affections could have become secretly engaged was a thing so unlikely, +that even when Mrs. Hamilton suggested it, both she and her husband +banished the idea as impossible; for St. Eval alone had she evinced any +marked preference. + +"You must speak to her, Emmeline, I dare not; for I feel too angry and +disappointed to argue calmly. She has deceived us; all your cares appear +to have been of no avail; all the watchful tenderness with which she had +been treated thus returned! I could have forgiven it, I would not have +said another word, if she had conducted herself towards him with +propriety; but to give him encouragement, such as all who have seen them +together must have remarked; to attract him by every winning art, to +chain him to her side, and then reject him with scorn. What could have +caused her conduct, but the wish to display her power, her triumph over +one so superior? Well might he say she had sunk in his estimation. Why +did we not question her, instead of thus fondly trusting in her +integrity? Emmeline, we have trusted our child too confidently, and thus +our reliance is rewarded." + +Seldom, if ever, had Mrs. Hamilton seen her husband so disturbed; for +some little time she remained with him, and succeeded partly in soothing +his natural displeasure. She then left him to compose her own troubled +and disappointed feelings ere she desired the presence of her child. +Meanwhile, as the happy Emmeline went to prepare her little packet for +her dear old nurse, the thought suddenly arose that St. Eval had sent +his remembrances and adieus to Ellen only, he had not mentioned +Caroline; and unsophisticated as she was, this struck her as something +very strange, and she was not long in connecting this circumstance with +his sudden departure. Wild, sportive, and innocent as Emmeline was, she +yet possessed a depth of reflection and clearness of perception, which +those who only knew her casually might not have expected. She had marked +with extreme pleasure that which she believed the mutual attachment of +St. Eval and her sister; and with her ready fancy ever at work, had +indulged very often in airy visions, in which she beheld Caroline +Countess St. Eval, and mistress of that beautiful estate in Cornwall, +which she had heard Mrs. Hamilton say had been presented by the Marquis +of Malvern to his son on his twenty-first birthday. Emmeline had +indulged these fancies, and noticed the conduct of Caroline and St. +Eval till she really believed their union would take place. She had been +so delighted at the receipt of Mary's letter, that she had no time to +remember the young Earl's departure; but when she was alone, that truth +suddenly flashed across her mind, and another strange incident, though +at the time she had not remarked it, when she had said as her brother +she would remember him, he had repeated, with startling emphasis, "as +her _friend_." "What could it all mean?" she thought. "Caroline cannot +have rejected him? No, that is quite impossible. My sister would surely +not be such a practised coquette. I must seek her and have the mystery +solved. Surely she will be sorry St. Eval leaves us so soon." + +Emmeline hastened first to Ellen, begging her to pack up the little +packet for Mrs. Langford, for she knew such an opportunity would be as +acceptable to her cousin as to herself; for Ellen never forgot the +humble kindness and prompt attention she had received from the widow +during her long and tedious illness; and by little offerings, and what +the good woman still more valued, by a few kind and playful lines, which +ever accompanied them, she endeavoured to prove her sense of Widow +Langford's conduct. + +In five minutes more Emmeline was in her sister's room. Caroline was +partly dressed as if for a morning drive, and her attendant leaving just +as her sister entered. She looked pale and more fatigued than usual, +from the gaiety of the preceding night. Happy she certainly did not +look, and forgetting in that sight the indignation which the very +supposition of coquetry in her sister had excited, Emmeline gently +approached her, and kissing her cheek, said fondly-- + +"What is the matter, dear Caroline? You look ill, wearied, and even +melancholy. Did you dance more than usual last night?" + +"No," replied Caroline; "I believe not. I do not think I am more tired +than usual. But what do you come for, Emmeline? Some reason must bring +you here, for you are generally hard at work at this time of the day." + +"My wits have been so disturbed by Mary's letter, that I have been +unable to settle to anything," replied her sister, laughing; "and to add +to their disturbance, I have just heard something so strange, that I +could not resist coming to tell you." + +"Of what nature?" + +"St. Eval leaves London to-day for Castle Malvern, and next week quits +England. Now is not that extraordinary?" + +Caroline became suddenly flushed with crimson, which quickly receding, +left her even paler than before. + +"She is innocent," thought Emmeline. "She loves him. St. Eval must have +behaved ill to her; and yet he certainly looked more sinned against than +sinning." + +"To-day: does he leave to-day?" Caroline said, at length, speaking, it +appeared, with effort, and turning to avoid her sister's glance. + +"In little more than an hour's time; but I am sorry I told you, dear +Caroline, if the news has pained you." + +"Pained me," repeated her sister, with returning haughtiness; "what can +you mean, Emmeline? Lord St. Eval is nothing to me." + +"Nothing!" repeated the astonished girl. "Caroline, you are +incomprehensible. Why did you treat him with such marked attention if +you cared nothing for him?" + +"For a very simple reason; because it gave me pleasure to prove that it +was in my power to do that for which other girls have tried in +vain--compel the proud lordly St. Eval to bow to a woman's will." Pride +had returned again. She felt the pleasure of triumphant power, and her +eyes sparkled and her cheek again flushed, but with a different emotion +to that she had felt before. + +"Do you mean, then, that you have never loved him, and merely sported +with his feelings, for your own amusement? Caroline, I will not believe +it. You could not have acted with such cruelty; you do love him, but you +reject my confidence. I do not ask you to confide in me, though I did +hope I should have been your chosen friend; but I beseech, I implore +you, Caroline, only to say that you are jesting. You do love him." + +"You are mistaken, Emmeline, never more so in your life. I have refused +his offered hand; if you wish my confidence on this subject, I give it +you. As he is a favourite of yours, I do not doubt your preserving his +secret inviolate. I might have been Countess of St. Eval, but my end was +accomplished, and I dismissed my devoted cavalier." + +"And can you, dare you jest on such a subject?" exclaimed Emmeline, +indignantly. "Is it possible you can have wilfully acted thus? sported +with the feelings of such a man as St. Eval, laughed at his pain, called +forth his love to gratify your desire of power? Caroline, shame on you!" + +"I am not in the habit of being schooled as to right and wrong by a +younger sister, nor will I put up with it now, Emmeline. I never +interfere with your conduct, and therefore you will, if you please, do +the same with me. I am not responsible to you for my actions, nor shall +I ever be," replied Caroline, with cold yet angry pride. + +"But I will speak, when I know you have acted contrary to those +principles mamma has ever endeavoured to instill into us both," replied +Emmeline, still indignantly; "and you are and have been ever welcome to +remonstrate with me. I am not so weak as I once was, fearful to speak my +sentiments even when I knew them to be right. You have acted shamefully, +cruelly, Caroline, and I will tell you what I think, angry as it may +make you." + +A haughty and contemptuous answer rose to Caroline's lips, but she was +prevented giving it utterance by the entrance of Martyn, her mother's +maid, with her lady's commands that Miss Hamilton should attend her in +the boudoir. + +"How provoking!" she exclaimed. "I expect Annie to call for me every +minute, and mamma will perhaps detain me half an hour;" and most +unwillingly she obeyed the summons. + +"Annie," repeated Emmeline, when her sister had left the room, +"Annie--this is her work; if my sister had not been thus intimate with +her she never would have acted in this manner." And so disturbed was the +gentle girl at this confirmation of her fears, that it was some little +time before she could recover sufficient serenity to rejoin Ellen in +arranging the widow's packet. + +Mrs. Langford had the charge of Oakwood during the absence of the +family, and Mrs. Hamilton, recollecting some affairs concerning the +village schools she wished the widow to attend to, was writing her +directions as Caroline entered, much to the latter's increased +annoyance, as her mother's business with her would thus be retarded, and +every minute drew the time of Annie's appointment nearer. She could +scarcely conceal her impatience, and did venture to beg her mother to +tell her what she required. + +"Your attention, Caroline, for a time," she replied, so coldly, that her +daughter felt instantly something was wrong, though what she guessed +not, for she knew not that St. Eval had obtained the sanction of her +parents for his addresses; and she little imagined he could have +anything to do with the displeasure she saw so clearly marked. + +"You will wait, if you please, till I have finished writing, as this +cannot be delayed. Lord St. Eval leaves town in a very short time, and I +send this by him." + +"Lord St. Eval," thought Caroline, suddenly becoming alarmed, "surely +mamma and papa know nothing of his offer." + +A few minutes passed in silence, which was broken by the sound of +carriage-wheels stopping at the door, and Robert almost instantly after +entered with Miss Grahame's love, saying she could not wait a minute, +and hoped Miss Hamilton was ready. + +"Miss Grahame!" repeated Mrs. Hamilton, in an accent of surprise, before +Caroline had time to make any answer; "Caroline, why have you not +mentioned this engagement? You do not generally make appointments +without at least consulting me, if you no longer think it necessary to +request my permission. Where are you going with Annie?" + +"To Oxford Street, I believe," she answered carelessly, to conceal her +rising indignation at this interference of her mother. + +"If you require anything there, you can go with me by and bye. Robert, +give my compliments to Miss Grahame, and say from me, Miss Hamilton is +particularly engaged with me at present, and therefore cannot keep her +engagement to-day. Return here as soon as you have delivered my +message." + +"Mother!" burst from Caroline's lips, in an accent of uncontrollable +anger, as soon as the servant had left the room; but with a strong +effort she checked herself, and hastily walked to the window. + +An expression of extreme pain passed across her mother's features as she +looked towards her, but she took no notice till Robert had returned, and +had been dismissed with her note to be given to Emmeline to transmit +with hers. + +"Caroline," she then said, with dignity, yet perhaps less coldly than +before, "if you will give me your attention for a short time, you will +learn the cause of my displeasure, which is perhaps at present +incomprehensible, unless, indeed, your own conscience has already +reproached you; but before I commence on any other subject, I must +request that you will make no more appointments with Miss Grahame +without my permission. This is not the first time you have done so; I +have not noticed it previously, because I thought your own good sense +would have told you that you were acting wrong, and contrary to those +principles of candour I believed you to possess." + +"You were always prejudiced against Annie," answered Caroline, with +rising anger, for she had quite determined not to sit silent while her +mother spoke, cost what it might. + +"I am not speaking of Annie, Caroline, but to you. The change in your +conduct since you have become thus intimate with her, might indeed +justify my prejudice, but on that I am not now dwelling. I do not +consider Miss Malison a fit chaperon for my daughter, and therefore I +desire you will not again join her in her drives." + +"Every other girl of my station has the privilege of at least choosing +her own companions without animadversion," replied Caroline, +indignantly, "and in the simple thing of making appointments without +interference it is hard that I alone am to be an exception." + +"If you look around the circle in which I visit intimately, Caroline, +you will find that did you act according to your own wishes, you would +stand more alone than were you to regard mine. I have done wrong in ever +allowing you to be as intimate with Miss Grahame as you are. You looked +surprised and angry when I mentioned the change that had taken place in +your conduct." + +"I had sufficient reason for surprise," replied Caroline, impatiently, +"I was not aware that my character was so weak, as to turn and change +with every new acquaintance." + +"Are you then the same girl you were at Oakwood?" demanded Mrs. +Hamilton, gravely yet sadly. + +A sudden pang of conscience smote the heart of the mistaken girl at +these words, a sob rose choking in her throat, and she longed to have +given vent to the tears which pride, anger, and remorse were summoning, +but she would not, and answered according to those evil whisperings, +which before she had only indulged in secret. + +"If I am changed," she answered passionately, "it is because neither you +nor papa are the same. At Oakwood I was free, I had full liberty to act, +speak, think as I pleased, while here a chain is thrown around my +simplest action; my very words are turned into weapons against me; my +friendship disapproved of, and in that at least surely I may have +liberty to choose for myself." + +"You have," replied Mrs. Hamilton mildly. "I complain not, Caroline, of +the pain you have inflicted upon me, in so completely withdrawing your +confidence and friendship, to bestow them upon a young girl. I control +not your affection, but it is my duty, and I will obey it, to warn you +when I see your favourite companion likely to lead you wrong. Had your +every thought and feeling been open to my inspection as at Oakwood, +would you have trifled as you have with the most sacred feelings of a +fellow-creature? would you have called forth love by every winning art, +by marked preference to reject it, when acknowledged, with scorn, with +triumph ill concealed? would you have sported thus with a heart whose +affections would do honour to the favoured one on whom they were +bestowed? would you have cast aside in this manner all that integrity +and honour I hoped and believed were your own? Caroline, you have +disappointed and deceived your parents; you have blighted their fondest +hopes, and destroyed, sinfully destroyed, the peace of a noble, +virtuous, excellent young man, who loved you with all the deep fervour +of an enthusiastic soul. To have beheld him your husband would have +fulfilled every wish, every hope entertained by your father and myself. +I would have intrusted your happiness to his care without one doubt +arising within me; and you have spurned his offer, rejected him without +reason, without regret, without sympathy for his wounded and +disappointed feelings, without giving him one hope that in time his +affection might be returned. Caroline, why have you thus decidedly +rejected him? what is there in the young man you see to bid you tremble +for your future happiness?" + +Caroline answered not; she had leaned her arms on the cushion of the +couch, and buried her face upon them, while her mother spoke, and Mrs. +Hamilton in vain waited for her reply. + +"Caroline," she continued, in a tone of such appealing affection, it +seemed strange that it touched not the heart of her child, "Caroline, I +will not intrude on your confidence, but one question I must ask, and I +implore you to answer me truly--do you love another?" + +Still Caroline spoke not, moved not. Her mother continued, "If you do, +why should you hide it from me, your own mother, Caroline? You believe +my conduct changed towards you, but you have condemned me without proof. +You have abandoned my sympathy--shrunk from my love. Try me now, my +sweet child; if you love another, confess it, and we will do what we can +to make that love happy; if it be returned, why should you conceal it? +and if it be not, Caroline, my child, will you refuse even the poor +comfort your mother can bestow?" + +She spoke in vain; but could she have read her daughter's heart at that +moment, maternal affection might not have been so deeply pained as it +was by this strange silence. Regret, deep, though unavailing, had been +Caroline's portion, from the moment she had reflected soberly on her +rejection of St. Eval. She recalled his every word, his looks of +respectful yet ardent admiration, and she wept at that infatuation which +had bade her act as she had done; and then his look of controlled +contempt stung her to the quick. He meant not, perhaps, that his glance +should have so clearly denoted that she had sunk in his estimation, it +did not at the moment, but it did when in solitude she recalled it, and +she felt that she deserved it. In vain in those moments did she struggle +to call up the vision of Lord Alphingham, his words of love, his looks +of even more fervid passion, his image would not rise to banish that of +St. Eval; and if Caroline had not still been blinded by the influence +and arguments of Annie, had she given her own good sense one half-hour's +uncontrolled dominion, she would have discovered, that if love had +secretly and unsuspiciously entered her heart, it was not for Lord +Alphingham. Had she really loved him, she could not have resisted the +fond appeal of her mother; but to express in words all the confused and +indefinable emotions then filling her heart was impossible. She +continued for several minutes silent, and Mrs. Hamilton felt too deeply +pained and disappointed to speak again. Her daughter had spoken to her +that morning as she had seldom done even in her childhood. Then her +mother could look forward to years of reason and maturity for the +improvement of those errors; now others had arisen, and if her control +were once so entirely thrown aside, could she ever regain sufficient +influence to lead her right. Seldom had Caroline's conduct given her so +much pain as in the disclosures and events of that morning. + +"Is it absolutely necessary," Caroline at length said, summoning, as her +aunt Eleanor had often done, pride to drown the whisperings of +conscience, "that I must love another, because I rejected Lord St. Eval? +In such an important step as marriage, I should imagine my own +inclinations were the first to be consulted. It would be strange indeed, +if, after all I have heard you say on the evil of forcing young women to +marry, that you should compel your own child to accept the first offer +she received." + +"You do me injustice, Caroline," replied her mother, controlling with an +effort natural displeasure; "St. Eval would not accept an unwilling +bride, nor after what has passed would your father and myself deem you +worthy to become his wife." + +"Then long may this paragon of excellence remain away," replied +Caroline, with indignant haughtiness kindling in every feature. "I have +no wish ever to associate again with one by whose side I am deemed so +unworthy, even by my parents." + +"Those who love you best, Caroline, are ever the first to behold and +deplore your faults. Have you acted honourably? have you done worthily +in exciting love merely to give pain, to amuse and gratify your own love +of power?" + +"I have done no more than other girls do with impunity, without even +notice; and surely that which is so generally practised cannot demand +such severe censure as you bestow on it." + +"And therefore you would make custom an excuse for sin, Caroline. Would +you have spoken thus a few months since? would you have questioned the +justice of your mother's sentences? and yet you say you are not changed. +Is it any excuse for a wrong action, because others do it? Had you been +differently instructed it might be, but not when from your earliest +years I have endeavoured to reason with, and to convince you of the sin +of coquetry, to which from a child you have been inclined. You have +acted more sinfully than many whose coquetry has been more general. You +devoted yourself to one alone, encouraged, flattered, because you saw he +was already attracted, instead of adhering to that distant behaviour +which would have at once told him you could feel no more for him than as +a friend. You would have prevented future suffering, by banishing from +the first all secret hopes; but no, you wished to prove you could +accomplish more than others, by captivating one so reserved and superior +as St. Eval. Do not interrupt me by a denial, Caroline, for you dare not +deliberately say such was not your motive. That noble integrity which I +have so long believed your own, you have exiled from your heart. Your +entire conduct towards St. Eval has been one continued falsehood, and +are you then worthy to be united to one who is truth, honour, nobleness +itself? Had you loved another, your rejection of this young man might +have been excused, but not your behaviour towards him; for that not one +good reason can be brought forward in excuse. I am speaking severely, +Caroline, and perhaps my every word may alienate your confidence and +affection still farther from me; but my duty shall be done, painful as +it may be both to yourself and me. I cannot speak tamely on a subject in +which the future character and welfare of my child are concerned. I can +no longer trust in your integrity. Spite of your change in manner and in +feeling towards me, I still confided in your unsullied honour; that I +can no longer do, you have forfeited my confidence, Caroline, and not +until I see a total change of conduct can you ever hope to regain it. +That perhaps will not grieve you, as it would once have done; but unless +you redeem your character," she continued "the serious displeasure of +both your father and myself will be yours, and we shall, in all +probability, find some means of withdrawing you from the society which +has been so injurious to the purity of your character. Whatever others +may do, it is your duty to act according to the principles of your +parents, and not to those of others; and therefore, for the future, I +desire you will abide by my criterion of right and wrong, and not by the +misleading laws of custom. When you have conquered the irritation and +anger which my words have occasioned, you may perhaps agree to the +justice of what I have said, till then I do not expect it; but whether +your reason approves of it or not, I desire your implicit obedience. If +you have anything you desire to do, you may leave me, Caroline, I do not +wish to detain you any longer." + +In silence, too sullen to give any hope of a repentant feeling or +judgment, convinced, Caroline had listened to her mother's words. They +were indeed unusually severe; but her manner from the beginning of that +interview could not have lessened the displeasure which she already +felt. We have known Mrs. Hamilton from the commencement of her career, +when as a girl not older than Caroline herself, she mingled with the +world, and we cannot fail to have perceived her detestation of the +fashionable sin of coquetry. The remembrance of Eleanor and all the +evils she entailed upon herself by the indulgence of that sinful fault, +were still vividly acute, and cost what it might, both to herself and, +who was dearer still, her child, she would do her duty, and endeavour to +turn her from the evil path. She saw that Caroline was in no mood for +gentle words and tenderness to have any effect, and therefore, though at +variance as it was to her nature, she spoke with some severity and her +usual unwavering decision. She could read no promise of amendment or +contrition in those haughty and sullen features, but she urged no more, +for it might only exasperate and lead her farther from conviction. + +For some few minutes Caroline remained in that same posture. Evil +passions of varied nature suddenly appeared to gain ascendancy in that +innately noble heart, and prevented all expressions that might have +soothed her mother's solicitude. Hastily rising, without a word, she +abruptly left the room, and retired to her own, where she gave vent to a +brief but passionate flood of tears, but they cooled not the fever of +her brain; her haughty spirit revolted from her mother's just severity. + +"To be scolded, threatened, desired to obey, like a child, an infant; +what girl of my age would bear it tamely? Well might Annie say I was a +slave, not permitted to act or even think according to my own +discretion; well might she say no other mother behaved to her daughters +as mine; to be kept in complete thraldom; to be threatened, if I do not +behave better, to be removed from the scenes I so much love, buried +again at home I suppose; is it a wonder I am changed? Is it strange that +I should no longer feel for mamma as formerly? and even Emmeline must +condemn me, call me to account for my actions, and my intimacy with +Annie is made a subject of reproach; but if I do not see her as often as +before, I can write, thank heaven, and at least her sympathy and +affection will be mine." + +Such was the tenor of her secret thoughts, and she followed them up by +writing to her friend a lengthened and heightened description of all +that had occurred that morning, dwelling long and indignantly on what +she termed the cruel and unjust severity of her mother, and imploring, +as such confidential letters generally did, Annie's secrecy and +sympathy. The epistle was despatched, and quickly answered, in a style +which, as might be imagined, increased all Caroline's feelings of +indignation towards her parents, and bade her rely still more +confidingly on her false friend, who, she taught herself to believe, was +almost the only person who really cared for her best interests. + +Days passed, but neither Mr. nor Mrs. Hamilton changed in the coldness +of their manner towards their child. Perhaps such conduct added fire to +the already resentful girl; but surely they might be pardoned for acting +as they did. Caroline's irritability increased, and Annie's secret +letters were ever at hand to soothe while they excited. She ever +endeavoured to turn her friend's attention from what she termed her +severe trials to the devotion felt towards her by Lord Alphingham, +declaring that each interview confirmed more and more her belief in his +passionate admiration. The evil influence which Miss Grahame's letters +had upon the mind of Caroline in her private hours, was apparent in her +manner to Lord Alphingham, when they chanced to meet, but even more +guarded than she had hitherto been, did Caroline become in her behaviour +towards him when her parents were present. Their conduct had confirmed, +to her heated and mistaken fancy, Annie's representation of their +unjustifiable severity, and that, indignant at her rejection of St. +Eval, they would unhesitatingly refuse their consent to her acceptance +of the Viscount. Caroline thought not to ask herself how then is my +intimacy with him to end? She only enjoyed the present as much as she +could, while the coldness of her parents, amidst all her pride and +boasted stoicism, still tortured her; and to the future Annie as yet +completely prevented her looking. Miss Grahame's plans appeared indeed +to thrive, and many were the confidential and triumphant conversations +she held upon the subject with Miss Malison, who became more and more +indignant at Mrs. Hamilton's intrusive conduct in taking so much notice +of Lilla, notwithstanding the tales industriously circulated against +her. Her own severity and malevolence, however, appeared about to become +her foes; for about this time a slight change with regard to the +happiness of her injured pupil took place, which threatened to banish +her from Mr. Grahame's family. + +One morning Mrs. Hamilton, accompanied by Ellen, called on Lady Helen +rather earlier than usual, but found their friend not yet visible, an +attack of indisposition confining her to her couch later than usual, +but Lady Helen sending to entreat her friend not to leave her house +without seeing her, Mrs. Hamilton determined on waiting. Annie had gone +out with Miss Malison. + +"No wonder our poor Lilla proceeds but slowly in her education," +remarked Mrs. Hamilton, when the footman gave her this information. "If +she be so much neglected, her father has no right to expect much +progress. I wish from my heart that I could think of some plan that +would tend not only to the happiness of this poor girl, but in the end +to that of her father also. Were those faults now apparent in her +character judiciously removed, I feel confident Mr. Grahame would have +more comfort in her than in either of his other children." + +"She is always very different when she is with us," observed Ellen. "I +can never discover those evil passions of which so many accuse her; +passionate she is, but that might be controlled." + +"It never can he while Miss Malison remains with her, for her treatment +is such that each year but increases the evil." A sound as of some one +sobbing violently in the adjoining room interrupted their conversation. +Fancying it came from the object of their conversation, Mrs. Hamilton +opened the folding-doors, and discovered her young friend weeping +violently, almost convulsively, on the sofa. Ever alive to sorrow, of +whatever nature or at whatever age, Mrs. Hamilton, followed by Ellen, +hastened towards her. + +"What has happened, Lilla?" she said, soothingly. "What has chanced to +call forth this violent grief? tell me, my love. You know you need not +hesitate to trust me with your sorrows." + +Unused, save from that one dear friend, to hear the voice of sympathy +and kindness, Lilla flung her arms passionately round her neck, and +clung to her for some few minutes till her choking sobs permitted her to +speak. + +"Aunt Augusta says I am so wicked, so very wicked, that mamma ought not +to keep me at home, that I am not at all too old to go to school, and +mamma says that I shall go--and--and"-- + +"But what occasioned your aunt to advise such an alternative?" demanded +Mrs. Hamilton, gently. + +"Oh, because--because I know I was very wicked, but I could not help it. +Miss Malison had been tormenting me all the morning, and exciting my +anger; and then Annie chose to do all she could to call it forth before +mamma, and so I just told her what I thought of both her and her amiable +confidant. I hate them both," she continued, with a vehemence even the +presence of Mrs. Hamilton could not restrain, "and I wish from my heart +I could never see them more." + +"If you gave vent to such sinful words before your mother," replied Mrs. +Hamilton, gravely, "I do not wonder at your aunt's suggesting what she +did. How often have I entreated you to leave the room when your sister +commences her unkind endeavours to excite your anger, and thus give your +mother a proof of your consideration for her present state of health, +and evince to your sister, that if you cannot calmly listen to her +words, you can at least avoid them." + +"Mamma never takes any notice, however much I may endeavour to please +her; if she would only caress me, and praise me sometimes, I know I +should be a very different girl. Then I could bear all Annie's cruel +words; but I will not, I will never put up with them, and permit either +her or Miss Malison to govern me and chain down my spirit, as they try +all they can to do. No one can ever know the constant ill-treatment +which I receive from both; everything I do, every word I speak, is +altered to suit their purpose, and mamma believes all they say. They +shall feel my power one day when they least expect it. I will not be +made so constantly miserable unrevenged." + +"Lilla, dear Lilla," exclaimed Ellen, imploringly, "do not speak thus; +you do not know what you say. You would not return evil for evil, and on +your sister. Do not, pray do not let your anger, however just, obtain so +much dominion." + +"Annie never treats me as a sister, and I do not see why I should +practise such forbearance towards her; but I will do all I can, indeed I +will, if you will persuade papa not to send me from home. Oh, do not +look at me so gravely and sadly, dearest, dearest Mrs. Hamilton," +continued the impetuous and misguided but naturally right feeling child. + +"I can bear any one's displeasure but yours; but when you look +displeased with me I feel so very, very wretched. I know I deserve to +lose all your kindness, for I never follow your advice; I deserve that +you should hate me, as every one else does; but you do not know all I +have to endure. Oh! do not let me go from home." + +"I cannot persuade your father to let you remain at home, my dear girl," +replied Mrs. Hamilton, drawing her young companion closer to her, and +speaking with soothing tenderness, "because I agree with your aunt in +thinking it would be really the best thing for you." + +"Then I have lost every hope," exclaimed the impatient girl, clasping +her hands despairingly. "Papa would never have consented, if you had +advised him not, and you, you must think me as wicked as aunt Augusta +does;" and the tears she had checked now burst violently forth anew. + +"You mistake me, my love, quite mistake me; it is not because I believe +you are not fitted to associate with your domestic circle. I believe if +she were but properly encouraged, my little Lilla would add much to the +comfort of both her parents; and I do not at all despair of seeing that +the case. But at present I must advise your leaving home for a few +years, because I really do think it would add much to your happiness." + +"Happiness!" repeated Lilla, in an accent of extreme surprise. "School +bring happiness?" + +"Are you happy at home, my love? is not your life at present one +continued scene of wretchedness? What is it that you so much dislike in +the idea of school?" + +"The control, the subordination, the irksome formula of lessons, prim +governesses, satirical scholars." Neither Mrs. Hamilton nor Ellen could +prevent a smile. + +"If such things are all you dread, my dear, I have no fear of soon +overcoming them," the former said, playfully. "I will do all I can to +persuade your father not to send you to a large fashionable seminary, +where such things may be the case; but I know a lady who lives at +Hampstead, and under whose kind guidance I am sure you will be happy, +much more so than you are now. If you would only think calmly on the +subject, I am sure you would agree in all I urge." + +"But no one treats me as a reasonable person at home. If mamma sends me +to school, it will not be for my happiness, but because everybody thinks +me so wicked, there is no managing me at home; and then in the holidays +I shall hear nothing but the wonderful improvement school discipline has +made, it will be no credit to my own efforts, and so there will be no +pleasure in making any." + +"Will there be no pleasure in making your father happy, Lilla? Will his +approbation be nothing?" + +"But he never praises me; I am too much afraid of him to go and caress +him, as I often wish to do, and tell him if he will only call me his +dear Lilla, I would be good and gentle, and learn all he desires. If he +would but let me love him I should be much happier than I am." + +Mrs. Hamilton thought so too; and deeply she regretted that mistaken +sternness which had so completely alienated the affections of his child. +Soothingly she answered-- + +"But your father dearly loves you, Lilla, though, perhaps your violent +conduct has of late prevented his showing it. If you were, for his sake, +to become gentle and amiable, and overcome your fears of his sternness, +believe me, my dear Lilla, you would be rendering him and yourself much +happier. You always tell me you believe everything I say. Suppose you +trust in my assertion, and try the experiment; and if you want a second +voice on my side, I appear to your friend Ellen for her vote as to the +truth of what I say." + +Mrs. Hamilton spoke playfully, and Ellen answered in the same spirit. +Lilla's passionate tears had been checked by the kind treatment she +received, and in a softened mood she answered-- + +"But I cannot become so while Miss Malison has anything to do with me. +I cannot bear her treatment gently. Papa does not know all I have to +endure with her." + +"And therefore do I so earnestly wish you would consent to my persuading +your father to let you go to Hampstead," answered Mrs. Hamilton, gently. + +"But then papa will not think it is for his sake I endeavour to correct +my faults; he will say it is the school, and not my own efforts; and if +I go, I shall never, never see you, nor go to dear Moorlands, for I +shall be away while papa and mamma are there; away from everybody I +love. Oh, that would not make me happy!" and clinging to Mrs. Hamilton, +the really affectionate girl again burst into tears. + +"What am I to urge in reply to these very weighty objections, my dear +Lilla?" replied Mrs. Hamilton. "In the first place, your father shall +know that every conquest you make is for his sake; he shall not think +you were forced to submission. In the next, compulsion is not in my +friend's system, and as I am very intimate with Mrs. Douglas, I shall +very often come and see you when I am in town, your midsummer holidays +will also occur during that time: and, lastly, if your papa and mamma +will consent, you shall see Moorlands every year; for I shall ask Mr. +Grahame to bring you with him in his annual Christmas visit to his +estate, and petition that he will leave you behind him to spend the +whole of your winter vacation with me and Ellen at Oakwood. Now, are all +objections waived, or has my very determined opponent any more to bring +forward?" + +Lilla did not answer, but she raised her head from her kind friend's +shoulder, and pushing back the disordered locks of her bright hair, +looked up in her face as if no more sorrow could be her portion. + +"Oh, I would remain at school a whole year together, if I might spend my +vacation at Oakwood with you, and Ellen, and Emmeline, and all!" she +exclaimed, with a glee as wild and childish as all her former emotion +had been. Lady Helen at that instant entered, and after languidly +greeting Mrs. Hamilton and Ellen, exclaimed-- + +"For heaven's sake, Lilla, go away! your appearance is enough to +frighten any one. I should be absolutely ashamed of you, if any friend +were to come in unexpectedly. Perhaps you may choose to obey me now that +Mrs. Hamilton is present; she little knows what a trouble you are at +home," she continued, languidly. + +The flush of passion again mounted to Lilla's cheek, but Ellen, taking +her arm, entreated to go with her, and they left the room together, +while Lady Helen amused her friend by a long account of her domestic +misfortunes, the insolence of her upper domestics, the heedlessness of +her elder, and the fearful passions of her younger daughter, even the +carelessness of her husband's manner towards her, notwithstanding her +evidently declining health, all these and similar sorrows were poured +into the sympathising ear of Mrs. Hamilton, and giving clearer and +clearer evidence of Lady Helen's extreme and increasing weakness of mind +and character. + +Great, indeed, was the astonishment of this indolent mother when Mrs. +Hamilton urged the necessity of sending Lilla to school. Without +accusing Miss Malison of any want of judgment, she was yet enabled to +work on Lady Augusta Denhain's words, and prove the good effects that a +removal from home for a few years might produce on Lilla's character. + +Lady Augusta's advice had been merely remembered during that lady's +presence, but seconded as it now was by the earnest pleadings of Mrs. +Hamilton, she determined on rousing herself sufficiently to put it in +force, if her husband consented; but to obtain his approbation was a +task too terrible for her nerves, and she entreated Mrs. Hamilton to +speak with him on the subject. Willingly she consented, only requesting +that Lady Helen would not mention her intentions either to Annie or Miss +Malison till her husband had been consulted, and to this Lady Helen +willingly consented, for in secret she dreaded Miss Malison's +lamentations and reproaches, when this arrangement should be known. + +When Mr. Grahame, in compliance with Mrs. Hamilton's message, called on +her the following morning, and heard the cause of his summons, his +surprise almost equalled that of his wife. He knew her dislike to the +plan of sending girls to school, however it might be in vogue; and +almost in terror he asked if she proposed this scheme because the evil +character of his child required some such desperate expedient. It was +easy to prove to him such was very far from her meaning. She spoke more +openly on the character of Lilla than she had yet done, for she thought +their long years of intimacy demanded candour on her part; and each +year, while it increased the evil of Lilla's present situation +heightened her earnest desire to draw the father and child more closely +together. She did not palliate her faults, but she proved that they were +increased by the constant contradiction and irritation which she had to +encounter. She repeated all that had passed between them the preceding +day, unconsciously and cautiously condemning Grahame's excessive +sternness, by relating, almost verbatim, Lilla's simply expressed wish +that her father would let her love him. + +She gained her point. The softened and agitated father felt +self-condemned as she proceeded; and earnestly implored her to give him +one more proof of her friendship, by recommending him some lady under +whose care he could with safety place his erring, yet naturally +noble-minded and warm-hearted child. A fashionable seminary, he was +sure, would do her more harm than good, and he listened with eagerness +to Mrs. Hamilton's description of Mrs. Douglas. The widow of a naval +officer, who had for several years been in the habit of educating ten +young ladies of the highest rank, and she mentioned one or two who had +been her pupils, whose worth and mental endowments were well known to +Grahame. + +"Do not be guided entirely by me on a subject so important," she said, +after recalling those families to his mind, whose daughters had been +placed there; "make inquiries of all who know Mrs. Douglas, and see her +yourself before you quite decide. That I have a very high opinion of her +is certain; but I should be sorry if you were to place Lilla with her +upon my advice alone, when, in all probability," she added, with a +smile, "you will find all Lady Helen's family opposed to the +arrangement." + +"As they have never guided me right when they have interfered with my +children, their approbation or disapproval will have little weight in my +determination," answered Grahame. "You have awakened me to a sense of +my duty, Mrs. Hamilton, for which I cannot sufficiently express my +gratitude. With too much reliance upon the opinions of others I have +regarded the many tales brought against my poor child, and now I see how +greatly her faults have been occasioned by mistaken treatment. I thought +once I could never have parted with a daughter for school, but now I see +it will be a kindness to do so; and pain me as it will, now I know that +I may in time win her affections, your advice shall be followed." + +"You must consent to part with her for one vacation also," replied Mrs. +Hamilton, playfully. "I have promised, in answer to her weighty +objection that she shall never see Moorlands again, to persuade you to +let her spend Christmas at Oakwood. You must consent, or I shall teach +Lilla a lesson of rebellion, and carry her off from Mrs. Douglas by +force." + +"Willingly, gratefully," exclaimed Mr. Grahame. + +"And you will promise me to permit her to love you, to use her own +simple affectionate words before she leaves you; you will not terrify +her by the cold sternness you frequently manifest towards her, and prove +that you take sufficient interest in her, to love her more for every +conquest she makes." + +"Faithfully, faithfully I promise, my kind friend." + +"Then I am satisfied," replied Mrs. Hamilton, her countenance glowing +with benevolent pleasure. "I shall, I trust, one day succeed in making +my little Lilla happy, and thus add to the comfort of her parents. We +are old friends, Mr. Grahame," she added, "and therefore I do not +hesitate to express the pleasure you have given me by thus promising to +think upon my advice. I began to fear that you would be displeased at +my interference, deeming my advice impertinent and needless. I have +endeavoured to impress upon Lilla the necessity of a temporary absence +from home, and have in part succeeded; and having Lady Helen's sanction +to speak with you, I could hesitate no longer." + +"Nor do I hesitate one moment to act upon your disinterested advice, my +dear friend. Your word is enough; but as you so earnestly wish it, I +will this very hour seek those of my friends who are acquainted with +Mrs. Douglas. I must leave Lilla to express her gratitude for her father +and herself." + +Mrs. Hamilton was soon placed at rest regarding the destination of her +young friend. There was not a dissenting voice as to Mrs. Douglas's +worth, one general opinion of satisfaction prevailed; but the most +gratifying tribute Grahame felt, was the affection and esteem which her +former pupils still fondly encouraged towards her. Thus prepossessed, +her appearance and manners did much to strengthen his resolve, and +Grahame now felt armed for all encounters with those who, presuming on +their near relationship to his wife, would bring forward numberless +objections to his plans; but he was agreeably mistaken. Lilla was looked +upon by them all as such an evil-minded, ill-informed girl, that it +signified little where she was placed, as she generally brought +discredit on all who had anything to do with her. Miss Malison, however, +excited their sympathy, and Annie declared it was a shameful and +dishonourable thing to dismiss her without notice, after so many years +of devoted service to their family. Poor Lady Helen had to encounter the +storm of upbraiding from her daughter, and the tears and sobs of the +governess, at the ill-treatment she received. In vain Lady Helen +accepted her protestations that she had done her duty; that she was sure +all that could be done for Miss Lilla had been done. Annie declared +that, though her services were no longer required for her ungrateful +sister, she could not do without Miss Malison, for her mother's health +seldom permitted her to walk or drive out. She should absolutely die of +_ennui_ without some one to act in those cases as her chaperon. In this +she was ably seconded by all her mother's family, whose _protegee_ Miss +Malison had long been, and, against his better judgment, Grahame at +length consented that Miss Malison should remain in his family till she +should get another situation as finishing governess. This, of course, +Miss Grahame had determined should not be for some little time. + +Mrs. Hamilton had been particularly cautious, in her interview with Mr. +Grahame, not to speak any word for or against Miss Malison; perhaps had +she said what she really thought, even this concession would not have +been made. + +Mr. Grahame's fixed and sudden determination to send Lilla to school +was, of course, laid by Annie and her confidant to Mrs. Hamilton's +charge, and increased not a little their prejudice against her, adding +fresh incentive to their schemes for the destruction of her peace, which +Caroline's self-willed conduct now rendered even more easy than it had +previously been. + +When all was arranged, when it was decidedly settled that Lilla should +join Mrs. Douglas's establishment at the conclusion of the midsummer +vacation, her father quietly entered the study where she was alone, to +give her this information, and his really fond heart could not gaze on +her without admiration. She was now nearly fifteen, though in looks, +manners, and conversation, from being kept under such continual +restraint, she always appeared at first sight very much younger. +Childlike in every movement, even her impetuosity might have aided the +deception; and Lady Helen herself had so often indolently answered +questions concerning her daughter's age, she believed she was about +twelve or thirteen, that at length she really believed it was so. It was +Annie and Miss Malison's interest to preserve this illusion; for were +she recognised as fifteen, many privileges might have been acceded to +her, very much at variance with their interest. Annie had no desire for +a rival to present herself, which, had her sister appeared in public, +would undoubtedly have been the case; Lilla gave promise of beauty, +which, though not perhaps really so perfect as Annie's, would certainly +have attracted fully as much notice. She was drawing a tiny wreath of +brilliant flowers on a small portfolio, which she was regarding with a +complacency that added brilliancy to her animated features. At her +father's well-known step she looked up in some little terror, and rose, +as was her custom whenever she first saw him in the morning; her fear +could not check the sparkling lustre of her eye, and Grahame, taking her +hand, said kindly-- + +"I have some news for my little girl, which I trust will prove as +agreeable as I have every reason to hope they may. Mrs. Douglas will +gladly consent to receive my Lilla as an inmate of her happy family." + +The flush of animation, the sparkling lustre of her eye faded on the +instant, and she turned away. + +"Why, our kind friend, Mrs. Hamilton, bade me hope this would be +pleasing intelligence; has she deceived me, love?" continued her father, +drawing her with such unwonted tenderness to him, that, after a glance +of bewilderment, she flung her arms round his neck, and for the first +time in her life wept passionately on her father's shoulder. + +"Can it be pleasure to hear I am to go from you and mamma?" she +exclaimed, clinging to him with all the passionate warmth of her nature, +and forgetting all her terror in that one moment of uncontrolled +feeling. Her simple words confirmed at once all that Mrs. Hamilton had +said in her favour, and the now gratified father seated her, as he would +a little child, on his knee, and with affectionate caresses gradually +soothed her to composure. Long did they converse together, and from that +moment Lilla's happiness commenced. She could not at once lose her dread +of her father's sternness, but the slightest hint from him was enough; +and frequently, as Grahame felt her affectionate manner, would he wonder +he had been blind to her character so long. The idea of school lost its +repugnance. Her father's kindness enabled her to keep her determination, +to prove, by the indulgence of the highest spirits, that going to +school, instead of being a punishment, as her aunt Augusta intended it +to be, was a privilege and a pleasure. That she was accused of want of +feeling she little heeded, now that her father invited and encouraged +her affection. Lady Helen wondered at her change of manner, but +indolence and the prejudice constantly instilled by Annie and Miss +Malison, prevented all indulgence of more kindly feelings. As things +remained in this state for some weeks in Mr. Grahame's establishment, we +will now return to Mr. Hamilton's family. + +It was about this time, some three or four weeks before the end of the +Oxford term, that letters arrived from Percy and Herbert, containing +matters of interesting information, and others which caused some anxiety +in the breast of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton. On the first subject both the +brothers wrote, so deeply interested had they become in it. Among the +servitors or free scholars of their college was a young man, whom they +had frequently noticed the last year, but never recollected having seen +before. He shrunk, as it appeared in sensitiveness from every eye, kept +aloof from all companions, as if he felt himself above those who held +the same rank in the University. Herbert's gentle and quickly +sympathising heart had ever felt pained, when he first went to college, +to see the broad distinction made between the servitors and other +collegians. He felt it pain to see them, as, in their plain gowns and +caps, they stood or sat apart from their brother students at their +meals, but perceiving by degrees they were all happy in their rank, +being, in general, sons of the poorer and less elevated classes of +society, happy to obtain an excellent education free of expense, he had +conquered these feelings, and imagined justly that they were, in all +probability, indifferent to the distinction of rank. But one amongst +them had recalled all these kindly sentiments, not only in the heart of +Herbert but in that of Percy, who was in general too reckless to regard +matters so minutely as his brother. The subject of their notice was a +young man, perhaps some two or three years older than the heir of +Oakwood, but with an expression of melancholy, which frequently amounted +almost to anguish, ever stamped on his high and thoughtful brow, and his +large, searching, dark grey eye. He was pale, but it appeared more from +mental suffering than disease, and at times there was a proud even a +haughty curl on his lip, that might have whispered he had seen better +days. He was never observed to be familiar with his brother servitors, +and shrunk with proud humility from the notice of his superiors. The +servile offices exacted from those of his degree were performed with +scrupulous exactness, but Herbert frequently beheld at such times a +flush of suffering mount into his cheek, and when his task was done, he +would fold his arms in his gown, and drop his head upon them, as if his +spirit revolted in agony from its employment. The other servitors were +fond of aping their superiors, by a studied affectation of similar dress +and manner, but this young man was never once seen to alter his plain +even coarse costume, and kept aloof from all appearance that would +assimilate him with those above him; and yet he was their +laughing-stock, the butt against which the pointed arrows of scorn, +contumely, ridicule, and censure were ever hurled, with a malevolence +that appeared strange to the benevolent hearts of the young Hamiltons, +who vainly endeavoured to check the public torrent. "He was not always +as he is now, and then, poor Welshman as he _is_, he always lorded it +over us, and we will requite him now," was the only reply they obtained; +but the first sentence touched a chord in Herbert's heart. Misfortune +might have reduced him to the rank he now held, and perhaps he struggled +vainly to teach his spirit submission; but how could he obtain his +friendship, in what manner succeed in introducing himself. Herbert was +naturally too reserved to make advances, however inclination prompted, +and some months passed in inactivity, though the wish to know him, and +by kindness remove his despondency, became more and more powerful to the +brothers. + +A side attack one day on the young Welshman, made with unwonted and +bitter sarcasm by an effeminate and luxurious scion of nobility, roused +the indignation of Percy. Retorting haughtily on the defensive, a +regular war of tongues took place. The masterly eloquence of Percy +carried the day, and he hoped young Myrvin was free from all further +attacks. He was mistaken: another party, headed by the defeated but +enraged Lord, who had been roused to a state of fury by young Hamilton's +appearance, surrounded the unhappy young man in the college court, and +preventing all egress, heaped every sarcastic insult upon him, words +that could not fail to sting his haughty spirit to the quick. Myrvin's +eye flashed with sudden and unwonted lustre, and ere Herbert, who with +his brother had hastily joined the throng, could prevent it, he had +raised his arm and felled his insulting opponent to the ground. A wild +uproar ensued, the civil officers appeared, and young Myrvin was +committed, under the charge of wilfully, and without provocation, +attacking the person of the right honourable Marquis of --. + +The indignation of Percy and Herbert was now at its height; and without +hesitation the former sought the principal of his college, and in a few +brief but emphatic sentences placed the whole affair before him in its +true light, condemning with much feeling the cowardly and cruel conduct +of the true aggressors, and so convinced the worthy man of the injustice +done towards the person of young Myrvin, that he was instantly +released, with every honour that could soothe his troubled feelings, +and a severe reprimand bestowed on the real authors of the affray. + +Percy pursued his advantage; the noble heart of the young Welshman was +touched by this generous interference in his behalf, and when the +brothers followed him in his solitary walk the following day, he +resisted them not. Gratefully he acknowledged the debt he owed them, +confessed he would rather have received such a benefit from them than +from any others in the college, and at length, unable to resist the +frankly proffered friendship of Percy, the silent entreaty of Herbert, +he grasped with convulsive pressure their offered hands, and promised +faithfully he would avoid them no more. From that hour the weight of his +reverses was less difficult to bear. In the society, the conversation of +Herbert, he forgot his cares; innate nobleness was visible in Myrvin's +every thought, act, and word, and he became dear indeed to the soul of +Herbert Hamilton, even as a brother he loved him. Warm, equally warm +perhaps, was the mutual regard of Myrvin and Percy, though the latter +was not formed for such deep unchanging emotion evinced in the character +of his brother. But it was not until some time after the commencement of +their friendship that Herbert could elicit from his companion the +history of his former life. + +It was simply this:--Arthur Myrvin was the only child of the rector of +Llangwillan, a small village in Wales, about ten or twelve miles from +Swansea. The living was not a rich one, but its emoluments enabled Mr. +Myrvin to live in comparative affluence and comfort; beloved, revered by +his parishioners, enabled to do good, to bestow happiness, to impart +the knowledge of the Christian faith, he beheld his flock indeed walking +in the paths of their Heavenly Shepherd. He had been enabled by the +economy of years to save sufficient to place his son respectably and +comfortably at college, and it was with no little pride he looked +forward to the time when those savings would be used for their +long-destined purpose. Arthur had grown beneath his eye; he had never +left his father's roof, and Mr. Myrvin trusted had imbibed principles +that would preserve him from the temptations of college life, and so +strong was this hope, that he parted from his son without one throb of +fear. + +The sudden change in his life was, however, too tempting an ordeal for +the young man. He associated with those above him both in rank and +fortune, who leading him into their extravagant follies, quickly +dissipated his allowance, which, though ample, permitted not +extravagance. About this time the noble proprietor of the Llangwillan +parish died, and its patronage fell to the disposal of a gay and +dissipated young man, who succeeded to the large estates. Inordinately +selfish, surrounded by ready flatterers, eager of gain, he was a +complete tyrant in his domains. + +The excessive beauty and fertility of Llangwillan, the industry and +simple habits of the inhabitants, excited the desire of possessing it in +the mind of one of these humble sycophants, and his point was very +speedily gained. Justice and humanity were alike banished from the code +of laws now in action, and, without preparation or excuse, Mr. Myrvin +was desired to quit that parish which had been his so long. His +incumbency expired with the death of the proprietor, and it had been +already disposed of. The grief of the old man and his humble friends was +long and deep; it was not openly displayed, the lessons of their beloved +pastor had too well instructed them in the duty of resignation; but aged +cheeks were wet with unwonted tears, and mingled with the sobs of +childhood. Men, women, youth, and little children alike wept, when their +pastor departed from the village. He who had been the shepherd of his +flock so long, was now cast aside as a worthless thing, and the old +man's heart was wellnigh broken. In a rude cot, forced on his acceptance +by a wealthy parishioner, situated some eight or ten miles from the +scene of his happiness, he took up his abode, and to him would the +villagers still throng each Sabbath, as formerly to the humble church, +and old Myrvin, in the midst of his own misfortunes, found time to pray +for that misguided and evil-directed man who had succeeded him in his +ministry, and brought down shame on his profession, and utterly +destroyed the peace which Llangwillan had enjoyed so long. + +Resignation by degrees spread over Myrvin's mind, but the conduct of his +son caused him fresh anxiety. The news of the change in his father's +life awakened Arthur from his lethargy; he saw the folly, the imprudence +of which he had been guilty; his father could no longer support him at +college. In three years he had squandered away that which, with economy, +would have served as maintenance for ten, and now he must leave the +college, or do that from which at first his very soul revolted; but the +image of his father, his injured father, rose before him. He could not +inflict upon him a disappointment so severe as his departure from +college would be. He would yet atone for his folly, and fulfil his +father's long-cherished hopes, and without consulting him, in a moment +of desperation, he sought the resident head of the University, and +imparted his wishes. The preliminaries were quickly settled, and the +next letter from Oxford which Mr. Myrvin received, contained the +intelligence that his son had reconciled his mind to the change, and +become a servitor. + +A glow of thanksgiving suffused the old man's heart, but he knew all the +inward and outward trials with which his son had to contend. Had he at +the first joined the college in the rank which he now held, he might not +have felt the change so keenly; but as it was, the pride and haughtiness +which had characterised him before, were now, as we have seen, returned +tenfold upon himself. He clothed himself outwardly in an invulnerable +armour of self-control and cold reserve, but inwardly his blood was in +one continued fever, until the friendship of Percy and Herbert soothed +his troubled feelings. The name of Hamilton, Herbert continued to state, +for it was he who wrote particularly of Arthur, the young man had +declared he knew well; but where he had heard it, or how, appeared like +a dream. He thought he had even seen Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton once, not +very many years ago; but so many changes in his life had occurred since +then, that the particulars of that meeting he could not remember. +"Myrvin and Llangwillan appear equally familiar to me," wrote Herbert; +"but even more than to Arthur they seem as the remembrances of an +indistinct dream. It has sometimes occurred to me that they are combined +with the recollection of my aunt, Mrs. Fortescue, and Arthur, to whom I +mentioned her death, suddenly recalled a dying lady and her two +children, in whom his father was very much interested. Fortescue he does +not well remember, but the little girl's name was Ellen, a pale, +dark-eyed and dark-haired, melancholy child, whom he used to call his +wife, and my cousin certainly answers this description. If it be indeed +the same, it is strange we should thus come together; and oh! my dearest +father, the benefit our family received from this venerable and injured +man, bids me long more intently that we could do something for him, and +that Arthur should be restored to his former position. He is of full +age, and quite capable of taking orders, and I have often thought, could +he reside with Mr. Howard the year previous to his ordination, it would +tend much more to his happiness and welfare than remaining here, even if +he was released from that grade, the oppression of which now hangs so +heavily upon him. Follies have been his, but they have been nobly +repented; and something within me whispers that the knowledge he is my +dearest and most intimate friend, that we mutually feel we are of +service to each other, will plead his cause and my request to my kind +and indulgent father, with even more force than the mere relation of +facts, interesting as that alone would be." + +He was right. The friend, the chosen and most intimate friend of their +younger son would ever have been an object of interest to Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton. That he was the son of the same good man who had acted so +benevolently towards Eleanor and her orphan children, who had soothed +her dying bed, and reconciled the parting sinner to her Maker, added +weight to the simple yet pathetic eloquence with which Herbert had +related his story. The injury he had sustained excited their just +indignation, and if the benevolence of their kind hearts had required +fresh incentives, the unfeigned grief of Ellen, as the tale of the old +man was related to her, would have given it. + +"Oh, that I had it in my power to offer a sufficient sum to tempt the +sordid and selfish being in whose possession Llangwillan now is," she +was heard one day to exclaim, when she imagined herself alone, "that I +might but restore it to Mr. Myrvin; that I might feel that good old man +was passing his latter years in the spot and amongst all those he so +much loved; that Arthur could break the chain that now so bitterly and +painfully distresses him. Dear, dear Mr. Myrvin, oh, how little did I +imagine, when my thoughts have wandered to you and Arthur, who was such +a dear consoling friend in my childish sorrow, that misery such as this +had been your portion; and I can do nothing, nothing to prove how often +I have thought of and loved you both--and my dear mother's grave, in the +midst of strangers," and she wept bitterly, little imagining her +soliloquy had been overheard by her aunt and uncle, who were almost +surprised at her vivid remembrance of those whom for the last seven +years she had scarcely seen, and of whom she so seldom heard; but it +heightened their desire to be of service to him who had once been so +kind a friend to their family. + +The contents of Percy's letter, to the rather alarming and mysterious +nature of which we have already alluded, will be found in the next +chapter. + + + + +CHAPTER VI. + + +"Malison, dear Malison, congratulate me; the game is in my own hands!" +exclaimed Miss Grahame one morning as she entered the private room of +her confidant, about a week after the receipt of the letters we have +mentioned, with every feature expressing triumphant yet malignant glee. + +"That has been the case some weeks, has it not?" replied Miss Malison. + +"Yes; but not so completely as at present. Caroline has just left me; +she was afraid of imparting in writing the important intelligence she +had to give me, important indeed, for it saves me a world of trouble: +though did I allow myself to think on her present situation of +suffering, I believe that I should repent her perfect and innocent +confidence in me. Her defence of my character, whenever it is attacked, +almost touches my heart; but her mother, her intrusive mother, that +would-be paragon of her sex, rises before me and continually urges me +on; she shall learn, to her cost, that her carefully-trained children +are not better than others." + +"She has learned it partly already, by your account," remarked Miss +Malison, concealing under a calm exterior her detestation of Mrs. +Hamilton. + +"She has. That rejection of St. Eval assisted me most agreeably; I did +not expect that Caroline's own spirit and self-will would have aided me +so effectually. That disappointment with St. Eval has affected Mrs. +Hamilton more deeply than she chooses to make visible. Her coldness and +severity towards her child spring from her own angry and mortified +feelings; however, she lays it to the score of Caroline's faulty +conduct, and my friendly letters have happily convinced Caroline such +is the case. In my most sanguine expectations of triumph, I never +imagined I should succeed so well in severing the link between Mrs. +Hamilton and her daughter. Confidence is utterly at an end between them, +and that would be sufficient to gratify any one but myself; but my +vengeance for the prejudice and dislike with which this perfect creature +regards me must be more fully satisfied, at present it is only soothed. +Now you know, _chere_ Malison, you are dying with curiosity to hear what +new assistance has started up; a little more patience and you shall know +all. You are aware with what bitter and resentful feelings Caroline +regards the treatment she receives from her parents, and also from +Emmeline, child as she is." + +"Perfectly; nor do I wonder at it. In this case the immaculate Mrs. +Hamilton does not appear to practise what she preaches. It is rather +wonderful, that one who says so much about gentle treatment doing more +good than harshness, should now make her own child suffer beneath her +severity.'" + +"As I said before, Malison, her severity is but a disguise for +mortification and annoyance. Lord St. Eval, the heir of the Malvern +peerage, was too good a chance to be thrown away without vexation. +Caroline was a silly fool to act as she did, I must say that for her, +grateful as I ought to be for the assistance that foolish act has given +me. As for rejecting him merely for love of Alphingham, it is a complete +farce. She no more loves the Viscount than I do; perhaps not so much. I +make her believe she does, and so I intend to do till my plan is fully +accomplished; but love him as she would have done, as in all +probability, at the present moment, she loves Lord St. Eval, she does +not and never will. I shall make a fashionable pair, but not a love +match, Malison, believe me." + +"That Mrs. Hamilton may have the exquisite pleasure of seeing her +daughter like other people, however different she may choose to be +herself; you will rather do her a kindness than an injury, my dear Miss +Grahame." + +"Fortunately for my purpose, she will not think so. I shall, through +Caroline, inflict a deeper wound than I ever thought to have done. No +other injury would have touched her; she prides herself on Christian +forbearance and patience, and such like, which, simply translated, would +be found to be nothing but haughtiness and pride, and utter +insensibility to human feelings; but if Caroline goes wrong, elopes, +perhaps, as her aunt did, disregards parental commands, and acts in the +weighty affair of matrimony for herself, why that will be something like +a triumph for my diplomatic schemes." + +"You must work well on Caroline's mind to produce such a consummation," +observed Miss Malison. "I doubt much whether she would ever act in a +manner that she would believe so contrary to her duty. I would advise +you never to give her time to reflect." + +"I never mean to do so. If the silly girl had ever reflected at all, she +would at once have known that she loved St. Eval and not Lord +Alphingham; that her mother is her truest friend, and not Annie Grahame; +but as she chooses to remain so stupidly blind and trusting, why I see +no harm in playing my part, and as for her consenting, let her but hear +the honourable Viscount's sweet persuasive eloquence and look on his +handsome and pleading features, and consent will quickly be obtained." + +"But why should he not demand her at once of her father? Mr. Hamilton is +always friendly with him when they meet." + +"You have just hit the mark, _ma chere_. That very truth was always a +stumbling block in my machinations, for I almost feared, by Mr. +Hamilton's manner towards him, that the interesting tales concerning his +youth, which I had intended should be poured into his wife's ear, might +be disregarded; such from the first had been my intention, but I have +felt puzzled in a degree how to set about it." + +"Nay, you do yourself injury, my dearest Miss Grahame," observed the +ex-governess, officiously. "From your earliest years you were never +puzzled at anything." + +"My wits deserted me then for the moment," replied Annie, laughing, "and +would perhaps have returned when my plot was ripe for execution; but I +am happy to say I can dispense with their assistance, as I have received +it most effectually from a member of Mr. Hamilton's own family." + +"How!" exclaimed Miss Malison, much astonished. + +"Even so, _ma chere_; and now we come to the important intelligence +Caroline brought me this morning. It appears, that last week Mr. +Hamilton received a letter from Percy, which by her account must have +contained some mysterious warning against this very Lord Alphingham, +that his attentions to Caroline had been not only remarked, but reported +to him, and conjuring his father, as he valued Caroline's future peace, +to dismiss him at once and peremptorily. Thus much Mr. Hamilton imparted +to his daughter, a few days after the receipt of this letter, and after +bestowing some little approbation on her conduct towards him, which you +know before her parents is always particularly cold and guarded, he +requested, or rather desired, that she would gradually withdraw herself +entirely from his society, as he had received quite sufficient +confirmation of that letter to render him anxious to break off all +further communication and acquaintance with him. Caroline is such a +simpleton, I wonder she could prevent her countenance from betraying her +as he spoke; but I suppose she did, for Mr. Hamilton expressed himself +satisfied by her assurance that his wishes should not be forgotten. +Whether this letter contains other and more explicit matter she does not +know, but her state of mind at present is miserable enough to touch any +heart that is not quite so steeled as mine. I could almost smile at her +fond belief that she really loves him, for I see my own work, no tender +passion as she imagines; and to break off all intercourse with him +appears comparative torture. I have already convinced her of her +father's injustice and cruelty in acting thus capriciously towards one +so well known and so universally honoured, and merely from a mysterious +and unsatisfactory letter from a boy who knows nothing about the matter. +I hinted very broadly that it was only because her parents were provoked +at her rejection of St. Eval; and as they still had a lingering hope he +would return, they did not choose her to receive attentions from any one +else. I saw her eyes flash and her cheek crimson with indignation +against all who had thus injured her; and she declared with more +vehemence than I expected, that neither father nor mother, nor Percy, +should prevent her choosing a husband for herself. A violent burst of +tears succeeded this speech; but I continued to soothe and console her, +and she left me with a spirit vowed and determined to free herself from +such galling tyranny. And what do you think had been her mood when she +first came to me?" + +Miss Malison, as expected, expressed ignorance. + +"Why, the weak simpleton thought of confessing her whole tale of love to +her mother, and imploring comfort and assistance." + +"Take care she does not do so still," remarked Miss Malison. + +"Not she. I have proved too clearly how ridiculous and miserable she +would make herself by such a _denouement_. Her mother, I said, instead +of pitying, would assuredly condemn her for all the past, and most +probably convey her at once to Oakwood, and immure her there till Lord +St. Eval came to release her. She was both terrified and indignant at +the idea." + +"No wonder she should be; but do you know if she or her father have seen +Lord Alphingham since the arrival of this letter?" + +"But once, last night; and it was the fancied anguish felt for his +distress, which she was unable, as usual, to soothe, in consequence of +the keen _surveillance_ of her mother, that brought her here this +morning to tell me all. Mr. Hamilton was still courteous, but more +distant. I have convinced her, that as her parents no longer treat her +with confidence, she has no right to treat them with any; and as every +one knows the worthy character of the Viscount, she can be doing nothing +wrong in proving to him that her feelings in his favour are unchanged. +She has hinted to me to explain the situation in which she is placed, +but _entre nous_, I mean to do no such thing, for I have a plan of my +own to follow up. She is not aware how very intimate I am with the +Viscount, and how much he confides in me; all my persuasions will tend +to urge him to ask her of her father, and I am sure nothing can be more +honourable than that course of action." + +"Nothing, I am sure," echoed the conscientious confidant; "but how will +that assist your former scheme?" + +"Most admirably. Mr. Hamilton will, of course, decidedly refuse his +consent, without even consulting his daughter; the anger of Lord +Alphingham will be overpowering; rage against the father, and love for +the daughter will urge him to any and every means to obtain her hand. +Caroline's indignation against her father for acting in this way and +treating her so much like a child, feelings which I shall take care to +create and foster, will second his eloquence, and I feel quite certain +that next season Caroline Hamilton mingles in the most fashionable +circles as the Viscountess Alphingham; and to obtain such a triumphant +end, in my opinion, no means are faulty." + +"Most assuredly not. Not only the young lady herself, but her whole +family ought to be eternally grateful, for without such manoeuvring I +doubt much whether the perfect daughter or the self-satisfied mother +would obtain an establishment in all things so desirable. Enraged as she +will be at first at such unexpected conduct in the child she has so +ill-treated, she will thank you in the end, Miss Grahame, depend upon +it." + +"If I thought so, Malison, on my honour, I should feel disinclined to +proceed one step further in the business. Give her cause to thank me, +feel that I have unwittingly been of service to her whom of her whole +sex I hate the most, to one who from my earliest years I know regarded +me with aversion and contempt; Malison, I would draw back on the instant +did I think so. But no, it will not, it shall not be; the life of her +child as Countess of Alphingham will not be such as to bring peace to +Mrs. Hamilton's heart: to some mothers it might, but not to hers. She +shall behold in this marriage the complete failure of her plans, the +utter wreck of all her exclusive notions; she shall see that her +pretended goodness and Christian example are not exemplified in Caroline +at least. She shall feel my power--aye, bitterly. Thus will I +triumph--in Caroline's disobedience will I be avenged for the contempt +and dislike her mother has ever shown to me." + +She suddenly raised her slight figure to its full height, and looked on +her companion with a countenance expressive of such malignant triumph, +that all, save her companion in iniquity, must have shuddered as they +beheld such youthful features so deformed. Some other conversation +passed between her and her able confidant, but as little more was said +on the subject most interesting to us, we will not follow them further. +Annie's evil schemes are already too clearly displayed; her mind unable, +as Miss Malison's, to comprehend the exalted nature of Mrs. Hamilton's +character, looked upon it with detestation; the more so, as feeling she +was ever _acting_--she believed it hypocrisy; that the worth for which +even those who visited her not gave her credit, was not her real +character, but an artful veil to conceal evil qualities. The quick +penetration of Miss Grahame had even in childhood discovered that she +was no favourite, and accustomed to be spoiled and flattered by all with +whom she associated, her indignation and dislike towards the only one +who would dare treat her differently, look on her as a mere child, +rendered ridiculous by affectation, increased with her years. She soon +discovered the influence she possessed over Caroline, and on that, +knowing also her faults, she determined to work, and thus effectually +destroy the peace of a mother devoted to her children, and prove to the +world that the eccentric seclusion of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton for their +children's benefit was productive of no more good, if as much as the +plain and in her eyes only useful plan of fashionable education. + +In her first scheme she had already succeeded more than she was perhaps +conscious. The affair of St. Eval had clearly and painfully proved to +Mr. Hamilton that the fears of his wife the night of Caroline's +introduction--those anxious fears, were indeed well founded. She had +sunk beneath temptation; integrity and honour, and every better feeling +had been overcome by that inordinate love of power which her mother from +the first had seen and dreaded. The father's heart was pained and +disappointed, not only in this, but that his Caroline now was not the +same as she had been at Oakwood. A change had come over her, and +darkening her spirit, rendered her conduct at home gloomy, distrustful, +and uneasy; the irritability of her childhood had returned, her very +conversation appeared restrained, and since the departure of Lord St. +Eval, her cheek had become pale, and her eye no longer sparkling; and +only in the excitement of society her parents beheld her as formerly. +Mr. Hamilton was deeply grieved, but he knew not, guessed not the extent +of his wife's anguish. She saw every foreboding fear fulfilled; the +confidence of her child was entirely withheld from her; the coldness +with which she felt compelled to treat her disregard of her wishes had, +she felt assured, completely alienated her affection. Caroline could no +longer love her; every week, every day proved, by a hundred minute +circumstances, her affection was fleeting, and her mother despairingly +felt, never to return; and yet she had but done her duty, exercised her +natural authority to lead her erring child in the better way. Her firm +unshrinking discipline in childhood had only bound the cords of +affection between herself and her offspring more firmly together; but +now in the case of Caroline it appeared about to snap them asunder. Her +fond heart yearned constantly towards her daughter, but she would not +give way, for the sake of Emmeline and Ellen, whose efforts vied with +each other to increase the comfort and happiness of her they so dearly +loved. Their affection, their confidence would not change--no, however +her authority might interfere with their wishes; and should she become +repining and gloomy, because there was one source of sorrow amidst so +many blessings? her pious heart struggled for submission, and obtained +it. But Caroline guessed not the deep pang she had inflicted; she knew +not the many tears shed in secret, the many inward prayers offered up +for her, that however severe was her chastening, it might be blessed, +and bring her back to the deserted fold, to the bosom of her mother. She +knew not this, nor was Annie conscious how fearfully her plans had +succeeded in inflicting pain. + +The very cheerfulness of Mrs. Hamilton, striven for as it was, the +unwavering kindness of her manner towards Emmeline and Ellen, increased +the irritability of Caroline, and with it her indignation at her +mother's coldness and severity towards herself. She felt she was indeed +a slave, and longed to throw aside that galling bondage. What right had +her mother to treat her thus? Why must her every action be controlled, +her very friendship disapproved of? She felt she was the injured one, +and therefore allowed herself no thought for her whom she in truth had +injured. For the same reason she clung yet closer to Annie; in her +alone, in her present state of mind, she found full sympathy, and yet +even with her she was not happy; there was a strange indefinable +sensation in her heart that even to her friend she could not express. +There was a void within, a deep yearning void, which tortured her in her +solitary moments, which even the society of Lord Alphingham could not +wholly remove. In solitude she blindly taught herself to believe that +void must be for him. How far she erred a future page must tell. + +Her conduct in society meanwhile, since the departure of St. Eval, had +been guarded and reserved, and her parents, fondly trusting their +displeasure had been of service, relaxed after the first fortnight in +their coldness and mistrustful manner towards her. Mrs. Hamilton had +hoped the pale cheek and dim eye proceeded from remorse; and had not +Caroline been so pointedly distant and reserved when in her society, she +would have lavished on her all the tenderness of former years. + +When that mysterious letter from Percy came, although it caused his +parents considerable anxiety, yet it never once occurred that any +coldness on their part towards Lord Alphingham could occasion Caroline +any pain. Percy wrote with a degree of eloquent earnestness that could +not be resisted, and guarded as his information and caution was, Mr. +Hamilton determined implicitly to abide by it. The young man wrote what +Annie had informed Miss Malison; that he had heard from more than one +quarter of Lord Alphingham's marked attentions to his sister, that he +had even been congratulated on the brilliant alliance Caroline was about +to make. He did not, he could not believe that such was the case, he +said, for he should then have heard it from his parents, but he conjured +his father, however casual the Viscount's attentions might be, to +withdraw Caroline entirely from them. + +"I know well," he wrote. "Father, as you value my sister's future peace, +expose her not to his many fascinations. If he has endeavoured to win +her heart, if he has paid her marked attentions, he is a villain! I dare +not be more explicit, I am pledged to silence, and only to you, my dear +father, and on such an emergency, am I privileged to write thus much. +Desire Caroline to give him no more encouragement, however slight; but +do not tell even this, it may not only alarm her, but be imparted +perhaps to her friend, as young ladies are fond of doing. You have once +said I never deceived you; father, trust me now, this is no jest; my +sister's happiness is too dear to me. Break off all connection with Lord +Alphingham. I give no credit to the rumours I have heard, for your +letters this season bade me hope Lord St. Eval would have been my +sister's choice. His departure from England has dispelled these visions; +but yet Caroline's affections cannot have been given to Lord Alphingham +without your or my mother's knowledge. Again I implore you, associate no +more with him, he is not worthy of my father's friendship." + +Mysterious as this was, yet both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton knew Percy too +well to imagine he would write thus without strong cause. The suspicions +and almost unconscious prejudice entertained towards him by Mrs. +Hamilton received confirmation by this letter, and she was pleased that +her husband determined no longer to encourage his intimacy. Percy wrote, +if he had paid Caroline marked attentions, or endeavoured to win her +heart, he was a villain, and he had done so, and Mrs. Hamilton could not +but feel sufficiently rejoiced at Caroline's apparent manner towards +him. Deceived as she had been, yet that her once honourable child should +so entirely forget the principles of her childhood, as to give him +secret encouragement, while her conduct in society rather bespoke +indifference and pride than pleasure, that Caroline could have been led +to act thus was a thing so morally impossible to Mrs. Hamilton, that she +had no hesitation whatever in complying with Percy's request, little +imagining that in doing so she placed an inseparable bar to her +regaining the confidence of her child, and widened more painfully the +breach between them. + +Caroline's heart, on receiving her father's command to withdraw herself +by degrees entirely from Lord Alphingham, was wrung with many bitter and +contending feelings. At first she reproached herself for having thus +completely concealed her feelings, and, had she followed the impulse of +nature, she would at once have thrown herself on her mother's neck, and +there confessed all, that she loved him; that she had long done so, and +implore her not to check their intercourse without some more explicit +reason: but Annie's evil influence had been too powerful. She dreaded +her reproaches on this want of confidence in herself, or what was still +worse, her satirical smile at her ridiculous weakness, and then she +remembered her mother's displeasure at her former conduct, and dreaded a +renewal of the same coldness, perhaps even increased control. She +determined, therefore, to wait till she had seen Annie; and that +interview rendered her more miserable, excited still more her +indignation against her parents and brother, and strengthened the +feelings of devoted affection with which she fancied she regarded Lord +Alphingham. Annie's continued notes confirmed these feelings; under the +specious intention of soothing Caroline's wounded pride, it was very +easy for her to disguise her repeated insinuations of Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton's injustice and caprice towards the Viscount, and tyranny +towards herself. The veil she had thrown over Caroline's sober judgment +became thicker and more blinding, and Caroline could sometimes scarcely +restrain even before her parents the indignation which so continually +filled her heart. + +Mrs. Hamilton was ignorant of the communications that were so constantly +passing between Annie and her daughter, or she might perhaps have put a +stop to them. Caroline's own maid, Fanny, had been persuaded to become +the means of receiving and sending their intelligence in secret. The +conscience of the girl reproached her more than once, but the idea was +so improbable that Miss Caroline could act improperly, that she +continued faithful to her wishes, even against her better judgment. + +Lord Alphingham's ready penetration was puzzled at the change of manner +in both Mr. Hamilton and his daughter. The latter, he could easily +perceive, was constrained to act thus, and his determination to release +her from such thraldom became more strongly fixed within him. He became +as cold and reserved to her father as Mr. Hamilton had been to him; but +his silent yet despairing glances ever turned towards Caroline, were, he +felt assured, quite enough to rivet his influence more closely around +her. The following morning, as Annie had expected, the Viscount sought +her to give vent to his fears about Caroline; his indignation against +the unaccountable alteration in Mr. Hamilton's manner. What could have +caused it? He had ever acted honourably and nobly, openly marked his +preference, and he had talked himself into a passion, before his +companion offered to give him any advice or speak any comfort. + +"They are either determined their daughter shall not marry whom she +likes, in revenge for her not accepting whom they selected, or they are +resolved, by this studied display of coldness, to bring you to a point, +so I advise you to speak to this stern capricious father at once." + +"And what good will that do?" + +"A great deal, if you manoeuvre properly, on which quality you +fortunately require no lessons from me. You will, at least, discover Mr. +Hamilton's intentions. If he receive you, well and good, you should be +flattered at his condescension; if the contrary, you will, at least, +know on what ground you stand, and the situation in which my poor friend +must be placed. She is worried to death with the continual caprices of +mamma and papa. It would be a charity in any one to break the chains in +which she is held. She came to me yesterday in the deepest distress, and +all from caprice; for what else can it be that has changed Mr. +Hamilton's manner?" + +Lord Alphingham's fancy became more and more warmed as she spoke; vanity +and self-love were alike gratified, and he answered eagerly-- + +"I may depend, then, on her affections; she will not, for fear of mamma, +play me false." + +"Not she; that is to say, if you do not betray her in your eagerness to +ask her of her father. You have never yet asked the question, though you +have discovered she loves you; but if, in demanding her of her father, +you say you have gained her affections, the consequence will be, if Mr. +Hamilton refuse her, she will be borne instantly to Oakwood, and there +imprisoned, till the poor girl pines and droops like a chained bird +without hope of freedom. Whereas, if you will only govern your impetuous +temper, and trust to her affections and my friendship, your every wish +may be gratified, with or without Mr. Hamilton's advice." + +"And you will assist us;--adorable girl! how can we ever repay you?" he +exclaimed, raising her hand passionately to his lips. The cheek of Annie +suddenly blanched, but a cold, proud smile curled her lip. She answered +him in his own spirit, and after a prolonged interview, the Viscount +departed to act on her advice. + +Ere that day closed, Lord Alphingham had sought, Mr. Hamilton, and with +every demonstration of respectful yet passionate affection, solicited +his consent to address his daughter. The warning of his son, the strong +term he had used, were engraved on Mr. Hamilton's mind, and scarcely +could he answer the Viscount with his accustomed calmness. Politely but +decidedly he refused, adding, that he had hoped the constant reserve of +Caroline's manner would at once have convinced him of her feelings, and +spared him the pain of refusing for her the honourable alliance Lord +Alphingham proposed. A haughty and somewhat triumphant smile played for +a second on the Viscount's lips, but Mr. Hamilton understood not its +import; and his companion, with many expressions of wounded feeling and +injured honour, departed, leaving Mr. Hamilton rather pleased than +otherwise at this affair, as it gave him a plausible excuse for +withdrawing entirely from his society. He imparted what had passed to +his wife, and both agreed it was better for Caroline to say nothing of +his proposals; and this determination, for once, was not thwarted by +Annie, who thought it better for Lord Alphingham to plead his own cause +at some future time when the idea of his having been refused without +consulting her, the person principally concerned, would excite yet +greater indignation toward her parents, and assist effectually the cause +of her lover, who, leaving town for a week or two to prove to Mr. +Hamilton his wounded feelings were no pretence, or for some other +reason, left to Annie the charge of preparing Caroline's mind for the +alternative he might propose. + +A circumstance happened about this time, which appeared greatly to +favour the schemes of Annie and Lord Alphingham, and expose Caroline +more powerfully to temptation. The Duchess of Rothbury had invited a +select number of friends to while away the remaining weeks of the London +season at her elegant seat, which was situated in a lovely spot, about +twenty miles from the metropolis. Amongst the number she, of course, +included Mrs. Hamilton, and expressed herself very much disappointed +when that lady tendered excuses. Mr. Hamilton could not leave town; he +had put Mr. Myrvin's case into the hands of an able solicitor, and +wished to remain on the spot himself to urge on the business, that it +might be completed before he returned to Oakwood. It was not likely, he +said, that the affair would occupy much time, the whole circumstance +being directly illegal. It had only been the age and poverty, combined +with the shrinking sensitiveness from public gaze, which had prevented +Mr. Myrvin from coming forward at the very first against his persecutor. +A specious tale had been brought forward to excuse the illegality, and +impose on the bishop in whose diocese Llangwillan was situated, and +Myrvin, though he could meet trials with resignation, was too +broken-hearted to resist them. Thus much Mr. Hamilton had learned from +Arthur, to whom he wrote himself, requesting him to give a minute +account of the whole circumstance. His earnestness, seconded by the +entreaties of both his sons, succeeded in banishing Arthur's proud +reserve, and Mr. Hamilton was now engaged heart and soul in his +benevolent scheme of exposing iniquity, and restoring the injured +clergyman to his grieving flock. He could not, therefore, leave London, +and Mrs. Hamilton who, for mere amusement, could not bear to part from +her children, for only Caroline was to accompany her, steadily resisted +the entreaties of her friend. For herself she was firm, but she +hesitated when the Duchess, seconded by her daughters, requested most +persuadingly, that if she would not come herself, she would, at least, +permit Caroline to join them. + +"You have known me so long, that I have the vanity to believe, that if I +promise to guard your child as if she were my own, you will trust her +with me," her grace urged, with a pertinacity that could not fail to be +flattering. "She will be as safe under my care as were she under the +observance of her mother." + +"That I do not doubt one moment," replied Mrs. Hamilton, earnestly; "if +I hesitated, it was from no doubt of either your grace's care or +kindness. If Caroline be willing to accept your invitation, and her +father consent, she has my permission." + +"Thank you, my good friend; I trusted in my eloquence to prevail," the +Duchess said, smiling with an air of sincerity that gratified Mrs. +Hamilton; and she quickly imparted to Caroline the accepted invitation, +but in vain endeavoured to read on the face of her child whether she +were pleased or otherwise. Circumstances which caused Mrs. Hamilton +rather to rejoice at Caroline's absence from London for a time, were to +the latter great preventives to the enjoyment to which, in such elegant +society, she might otherwise have looked forward. Annie Grahame was, +much to her own vexation, excluded from this select circle. The Duchess +had penetrated her designing character, and regarded her with a +prejudice, as violent as was her nature. She was only invited to those +large assemblies which included all her acquaintances, not merely her +friends. Amazed at this slight, Miss Grahame at once determined that +there the catastrophe for which she had so long planned should take +place, and her detestation of Mrs. Hamilton be gratified to the +uttermost. + +Would Lord Alphingham be there, was a question that crossed Caroline's +mind repeatedly, and was as often demanded of her friend. Annie either +would not or could not tell; and she would add, perhaps she ought to +congratulate Caroline on her separation from him, as such a dread +mandate had gone from her parent, and she surely would not wish to +encourage his society; and then she would implore her forgiveness, and +sympathise so well in her fancied distress, and describe that of Lord +Alphingham in such heightened colours, that Caroline, unsophisticated as +in some things she still was, felt truly miserable. The Viscount's +sudden departure from town would have been unaccountable, had not Annie +succeeded in persuading her that she was sure it was entirely owing to +her (Caroline's) coldness and Mr. Hamilton's unaccountable conduct. + +Mr. Hamilton did not at first approve of his daughter leaving home +without her mother, even to visit the Duchess of Rothbury, but he +yielded to the solicitations of his wife. They knew that Lord Alphingham +was somewhat of a favourite with the Duke, but felt so assured that the +heart of their child was entirely disengaged, at least to him, that on +his account they did not hesitate. Caroline's conduct with regard to St. +Eval had, they were convinced, proceeded from the pure love of coquetry; +they could not believe she had rejected him because she fancied she +loved another, they had had no cause to do so: and since Mrs. Hamilton +had spoken so seriously on the subject, Caroline's behaviour in public +had been such as to excite their approbation, and renew, in some +measure, their confidence in her integrity. She was more reserved, and +her manner to the Viscount, when they chanced to meet, had led them +trustingly to believe their commands on this head would be implicitly +obeyed. Perhaps Mrs. Hamilton's penetration had played her false; it was +strange that a mother so long accustomed to divine the thoughts and +feelings of her children, should have been thus blind to the emotions +with which Caroline believed she regarded Lord Alphingham. But, surely, +no farther proof than this was wanting to clearly demonstrate it was not +true love she felt; had it been that real, pure, fervid passion, could +one so unused to art have concealed the flushing cheek, the sparkling +eye, the trembling voice, which would invariably have betrayed her? No; +it was infatuation,--blind, maddening infatuation,--strengthened by +indignation towards her parents; by the wish to prove she could throw +off their control, and choose for herself, and love whom and where and +how she liked, without their choice and sympathy; and it was thus she +completely veiled her feelings. Can we condemn her mother for refusing +to believe the child she had trained and watched, and prayed for so +long, such an adept in deceit? Can we blame her want of penetration in +this instance, and think it unnatural in her character, when we remember +how completely the character of her child was changed? Surely not. It +would have been stranger had she, without proof, believed Caroline the +girl she had really become. + +The reflection that she could still write to Annie and hear from her, +consoled her for the temporary separation; and she joined the Duchess +with some degree of pleasure, which had, however, been slightly alloyed +by a conversation with her mother before she left home. Her spirit was +in too excitable a state to hear advice calmly. Every word Mrs. Hamilton +so gently said on her conduct being more guarded now than when under her +eye, her mild entreaties that for her sake Caroline would behave with +reserve, all fell on a poisoned ear. Sullenly she listened, and when her +mother bade her farewell, it was with a heart grieving bitterly. While +smarting under supposed injuries, how little did Caroline imagine the +real agony she inflicted on her mother. If the gentle heart of Mrs. +Hamilton had been wrung by the wayward conduct of her sister, how much +more so must it have been wounded, when she saw so many of those evil +qualities reflected in her child. + +At Airslie, so the residence of the Duchess of Rothbury was called, +Caroline found herself universally courted. She knew she was admired, +and she was flattered; but there was a ceaseless gnawing at her heart, +which not even gratified vanity could still. She knew not, would not +know, it was remorse. She believed it was the conduct of her parents; +the chain that was thrown round her actions, her disappointment with +regard to Lord Alphingham; for he was not, as in secret she hoped, he +would be, one of the invited guests. It was a task, a painful task, to +write home, but she forced herself to speak of the scenes around, and +sketch, with a masterly hand, some of the characters with whom she +mingled; and her parents strove to be satisfied, though there was +somewhat wanting in those letters which, when Caroline had been from +home, they had never missed before. + +"So that man of learning, that marvellous prodigy, that walking +cyclopaedia, Lord St. Eval, has absolutely deserted us, to bury himself +in Italy or Switzerland. Miss Hamilton, can you explain so wonderful and +puzzling an enigma?" mischievously demanded Lord Henry D'Este, one day, +as he found himself alone near Caroline. His friend's departure had +indeed been to him a riddle, and believing at length that it must have +originated in her caprice, he determined, whenever he had an +opportunity, to revenge St. Eval by doing all in his power to torment +her. A deep blush overspread Caroline's cheeks as he spoke, for except +that Mary Greville's letters had mentioned him, he was never spoken of +at home. + +"It ought not to appear a very puzzling riddle to you," she answered +quickly. "He has gone, I should imagine, to collect fresh matters for +reflection, that he may better deserve the title you have bestowed upon +him." + +"Nay, nay, surely he has enough of such matters to form four and twenty +good folio volumes," answered Lord Henry, laughing. "The art of +politeness he certainly has failed to retain, for you can have no idea +what a _brusque_ philosopher he is. I assure you, he terrified me the +last time I saw him. What your honourable father had done to him I know +not, but I met him just coming from Berkeley Square, and all the charms +he had lately invited around him had suddenly departed, he was a +different man, and that day, in a fit, I suppose, of spleen, he quits +London, and the next time I hear of him he is in Geneva: that noble Lord +is one of the strangest creatures I ever had the honour to know. +However, perhaps he has visited the Continent to learn politeness, and I +think he may chance to learn a lesson of love also. Not at all unlikely, +by the praises he bestows in his letters on a certain Louisa Manvers." + +In vain Caroline struggled to prevent a start, or her cheek from +suddenly paling. "Louisa Manvers," she repeated, almost unconsciously. + +"Yes, do you know her? by the bye, she must be some distant connection +of yours, I fancy; her brother is Lord Delmont, he inherited the title +from your maternal grandfather. St. Eval and Delmont were college chums, +and, though they are parted, retain all the romantic enthusiasm of +friendship. After spending some little time with your friends I believe, +at Geneva, the lone pilgrim bent his steps to Lago Guardia, and there he +has remained, wooing nature with his friend, and in all probability +playing the _devoue_ to Miss Manvers. We shall find Lord St. Eval +bringing home a fair Italian bride, before we are aware of it; that is +to say, if she will have the courage to pore through the deep and hidden +treasures of this volume, till she comes to the magic word heart." + +He might have continued, for Caroline, buried in her own miserable +thoughts, interrupted him not. Had she encountered the eyes of Lord +Henry, as they were fixed full of mischief upon her, she might have made +some effort to rouse herself, but as it was, she felt relieved and glad +when their _tete-a-tete_ was interrupted by the entrance of a merry +group, just returned in the highest spirits from exploring a thick and +mazy wood in the vicinity of the extensive grounds. + +"Good news for you all," exclaimed the Duke of Rothbury, entering +directly after; "we are to have another guest to-day, to keep us all +alive." + +"Who--who?" was reiterated by many voices, with somewhat of the noisy +mirth of children. + +"No less a person than Viscount Alphingham." An exclamation of pleasure +passed through the giddy crowd, but there was an expression in the +countenance of the Duchess, who had also entered from a drive, which, to +Caroline's quickly awakened fancy, appeared contrary to the general +emotion. "He is engaged as Sir Walter Courtenay's guest, so I cannot +claim him as mine," the Duke continued; "but that does not much signify. +Sir Walter is here every day, and Alphingham will of course accompany +him. He is the best fellow I know." + +"And this is the man papa, for no reason whatever, save from Percy's +ill-natured opinion, has desired me to slight, to behave in a manner +that, contrasted with former notice, must be madness itself; cruelty to +him, after what has passed between us, and misery to me. Surely, in such +a case as this I am not compelled to obey. When the general voice +proclaims him other than they believe, am I to regard what is in itself +a mystery? If Percy had good reasons for writing against him to papa, +for I am sure he must have done so, why did he not explain them, instead +of treating me thus like a child, and standing forward as his accuser, +when the whole world extols him? Why are the dearest wishes of my heart +to be destroyed merely by caprice? Percy ever tried, even in childhood, +to bid me to look up to him, and acknowledge his power, and thus he +would prove it; but he will find himself mistaken. When papa permits his +judgment to be blinded by the insinuations of a mere boy, I no longer +consider myself bound to obey him." + +Such was the tenor of Caroline's thoughts when alone, in the short +interval, ere she descended to dinner--there was no ray of happiness; +her heart had that day received a wound, nor could she derive comfort +even from the knowledge that Lord Alphingham was expected. She would not +permit herself to think on Lord Henry's conversation. What was it to her +if St. Eval married Louisa Manvers? then studiously she thought only on +the Viscount, and the situation with regard to him in which she was +placed, till her head ached with the intensity of its reflections. + +On entering the drawing-room she found, as she had anticipated, Lord +Alphingham the centre of a brilliant coterie, and for the space of a +minute her heart throbbed and her cheek flushed. He bowed respectfully +as she appeared, but with distant courtesy; yet she fancied the flow of +his eloquence was for a moment arrested, and his glance, subdued yet so +mournfully beseeching, spoke volumes. Neither at dinner nor during the +whole of that evening did he pay her more than ordinary attention; +scarcely that. But those silent signals of intelligence had even greater +power than words; for they nattered her self-love, by clearly proving, +that courted, admired, as he could not but feel he was by all around +him, his noble hostess perhaps excepted, yet all was as nothing, now +that her favour had been so strangely and suddenly withdrawn. His tone, +his manner, as he presented to her a note from Annie, of which he had +been the bearer, strengthened this illusion; and Caroline, as she +retired to rest, felt more and more convinced they were indeed mutually +and devotedly attached, and that her obedience to her parents could not +weigh against the duty she owed herself, the love he had evinced for +her. Annie's note strengthened this determination. + +"I give you joy, my dear Caroline," she wrote, "on the opportunity you +will now enjoy of receiving Lord Alphingham's attentions, undisturbed by +any of those wayward fancies which have lately so destroyed your peace. +Do not, for heaven's sake, by squeamish notions of filial obedience and +dutiful conduct--which I do assure you have been very long out of +date--destroy your own happiness. When parents cease to care for the +true welfare and felicity of their children, it becomes our positive +duty to care for them ourselves. Mr. Hamilton has given you no reason +for his command to withdraw yourself from the attentions of Lord +Alphingham; and surely that is the clearest imaginable proof that he +really has none to give, and that it is merely to gratify his own unjust +displeasure at your rejection of St. Eval, as if in such matters you had +not an undoubted right to decide for yourself. He cannot suppose that +you will now be contented with that which completely crosses your own +wishes, merely because he desires it. That was all very well in your +childhood, but at present, when your own reason must be satisfied, he +has no right to expect obedience. The whole conduct of your parents, you +have owned to me yourself, has been lately such as to alienate your +affection and confidence. They hold your will enchained, my poor friend; +and if you have not the spirit to break it, now a fair opportunity +occurs, forgive me, if I say I can no longer offer you consolation. Lord +Alphingham loves you, and long ere this, had it not been for your +mother's extraordinary conduct, would have proposed, and you might have +been now a plighted bride, or still happier wife. I much doubt, by a +few hints he dropped, if his late departure from town was not occasioned +by Mr. Hamilton's positive refusal to sanction his addresses to you. If +he has demanded your hand, and been rejected without your knowledge, +your father and mother have treated you with much confidence and +affection, have they not? Can they, dare they expect to receive yours, +when such is the case? Is it not a clear proof your happiness is not to +be consulted in any marriage you may form? It is ridiculous to imagine +that your mother has penetrated, in some degree, your feelings for +Alphingham, though perhaps not to their extent; and not approving of it, +for no reason whatever, she desires you to shun his society. Your father +refuses a most honourable offer, without even consulting the person +principally concerned. Caroline, my dearest friend, do not permit your +noble spirit to be thus bowed down. Whatever alternative Lord Alphingham +may propose becomes lawful, when you are thus cruelly persecuted. Many +secret marriages are happier, very much happier, than those for which +the consent of parents have been obtained. They think only of ambition, +interest; how can we expect them to enter into the warmth of youthful +feelings? Do not be frightened at my words, but give them a calm, just +deliberation. You have permitted your love for him to be discovered; it +becomes your duty to prove it still more clearly." + +Such were the principal contents of Annie's letter, more than sufficient +to confirm Caroline's already half-adopted resolution, and convince her +wavering judgment that obedience to her parents was now no longer a +duty; their unjust harshness had alienated her from them, and she must +stand forth and act alone. Conscience loudly called on her to desist; +that she was deserting the plain path, and entering the labyrinth of +deceit, but the words of Annie were before her. Again and again they +were read, till every word became engraved within her, and the spirit +they breathed thickened the film before her eyes, and deafened her ear +to every loudly-whispered reproach. Yet in silence and solitude that +still small voice, conscience, arose and left its pang, although on the +instant banished. + +A few days passed, and the conduct of the Viscount to Caroline continued +the same as it had been the first night. Publicly distant, secretly and +silently beseeching, with an eloquence few could have resisted. There +was a grand _fete_ and _dejeuner_ at Airslie, which was pronounced by +the connoisseurs in such things to be the most _recherche_ of the +season. But few, comparatively speaking, were the guests, though some +had ventured to travel twenty miles for the purpose; yet all was +elegant. The day was lovely, and with the bright sunshine and cloudless +sky, added new charms to this fairy land; for so, by the tasteful +arrangement of gorgeous tents, sparkling fountains, exotic shrubs, and +flowers of every form and shade, the _coup d'oeil_ might have been +termed. Musicians were stationed in various parts of the grounds. The +dance was enjoyed with spirit on the greensward, when the heat of the +sun had subsided into the advancing twilight, and the picturesque +groups, the chaste and elegant costumes scattered about, intermixed with +the beauties of inanimate nature, added life and spirit to the picture. + +It was an exciting and yet a soothing scene. Some minds, untouched by +care, would here have revelled in unchecked gladness. In others, it +might have been productive of that soothing melancholy, which, from its +very sweetness, we encourage till it becomes pain: such was the case +with Caroline. Her spirits, buoyed up at first with the hope and +expectation that here at least Lord Alphingham might resume his +attentions unremarked, she had been excited to unwonted gaiety; but as +the hours wore on, and he approached her not, that excitement faded into +melancholy and doubt. Not even had the usual signals of intelligence +passed between them, for he had been sedulously devoting himself to +almost every beautiful girl in the gardens. Jealousy for a moment took +possession of her mind, but that very quickly gave way to indignation +against her father. + +"If he has been treated as Annie tells me, if his proposals for me have +been rejected," she thought, "how can I expect or hope that he will +continue his addresses? He knows not but that I have been consulted, and +is my happiness to be overthrown, rudely cast aside, by the insinuations +of a boy?" and covering her face with her hands, she burst into tears: +the scene, the time, the faint sound of the distant music, encouraged +these feelings, and heightened despondency. Day was darkening around +her, aided by the sombre shade of the gigantic trees, which formed a +grove where she sat, and the music borne along at intervals sounded +unusually mournful. A heavy sigh near her aroused her from her painful +trance, and starting, she beheld the object of her thoughts standing by +her side. His speaking eyes were fixed on her with a glance not the most +obtuse imagination could have misinterpreted, and the whole expression +of his peculiarly handsome features betrayed the most eloquent and +pleading sympathy. + +"Oh, that it might be mine, the blessed privilege of endeavouring to +soothe or to relieve this grief!" he passionately exclaimed, as with an +air of the utmost respect he ventured to take her hand. "I had indulged +in presumptuous hopes. I had ventured to read the flattering notice +which I ever received from you as a confirmation of my wishes, and I +indulged in fondly-cherished visions that ere this I should indeed have +had a right, a holy right, to soothe your every grief and share in every +joy. I thought wrong; your flattering notice must have been but the +impulse of your kind heart, pitying what you could not fail to behold; +and yet, oh, Miss Hamilton, that very demonstration of your gentle +nature has increased my misery; it has bade me love, nay, adore you. I +blame you not. I have been presumptuous--mad. I had no right to expect +so much happiness. My proposals were refused. I was told your conduct +must have made it evident that I was not pleasing to you. I fled from +your presence, but I could not rest alone. Again, like a mad fool, I +have plunged myself in the centre of fascination. I could not exist +without the sound of your voice, though me it might never more address. +I could not live without glancing on your expressive eyes, your eloquent +smile, though on me neither more might beam. I am here, I feel my folly, +but I cannot tear myself away. Caroline, adorable Caroline!" he +continued, with well-practised passion, "only speak, command me; in what +way can I relieve the grief in which I see you plunged? Give me at least +the gratification of feeling I have been of service to you; that I have +done somewhat for your happiness, though by you mine has fled for ever." + +Rapidly yet eloquently had he spoken, and Caroline vainly struggled +with herself to interrupt him. He believed she had rejected him, and in +that moment she contrasted his present conduct with that of Lord St. +Eval, under the same circumstances, and surely she could doubt no longer +which loved her best. She had not seen the secret agony of the one--his +proud and noble heart concealed it; but Alphingham--when such devoted +love was offered her, would she condemn it to misery, and herself to +everlasting reproach, if not to equal woe? + +"You are mistaken, my lord," she said, proudly, after a severe struggle +with herself. "Lay not to my charge the loss of your happiness. I was +not aware till this instant that it depended--" She stopped abruptly, +for the natural modesty of her disposition prevented more, indignant as +she was at the confirmation of Annie's suspicions. + +Lord Alphingham saw his advantage, and pursued it. + +"How!" he exclaimed, in an accent of astonishment and ecstasy well +combined. "Have you too been deceived, and my proposals rejected without +having been laid before you? Can it be possible? Oh, speak again, my +beloved Caroline! tell me I have not been too presuming--that I may hope +that my long-cherished visions are not false. You will not, oh, you will +not condemn me to misery--you will not reject my heart, and send me +despairing from your feet. Caroline, my beloved, my beautiful! say that +you will be merciful--say that you love me--that I love not alone; oh, +say, promise me you will be mine, and come what will we shall be happy." + +She heard, and her heart throbbed and her brain reeled; in the +infatuation of that moment, all, all was forgotten, save the persuasions +of Annie, his pleading eloquence, the wild impulse of her own blinded +fancy; the fatal promise passed her lips--she was pledged to be his own. +A few minutes she listened to his impassioned thanks, his words of +devoted love, then suddenly starting back-- + +"My father!" she exclaimed, and burst into a passionate flood of tears. + +"Nay, weep not, my beloved, my own! let not a mere shadow, for such in +this instance is duty, alloy the felicity that will be ours. His consent +will in time be given; fear not, when he sees you happy, when he sees my +only care, my every thought is for your welfare, that his forgiveness +for involuntary disobedience will be granted, and his unjust and cruel +prejudices against me will pass away, for he will find they were indeed +but fancy; and if he continues obdurate, oh, how rejoiced I shall be to +have withdrawn my Caroline from his stern guardianship. Already has he +deceived you; and can he then expect implicit obedience to unjust and +unfounded commands on your part? Cheer up, my best love, fear not; trust +to my affection, and all will be well." + +But still she wept, even though Lord Alphingham continued this strain of +consolation for some little time longer. Fearing at length to attract +notice by her prolonged absence, she roused herself, and breaking from +her triumphant lover, remained for a few minutes alone, endeavouring, +but vainly, to recover that happiness which, when she had looked to an +union with the Viscount, had promised to dawn around her. She saw it +not; there was a dark, heavy, threatening cloud overhanging her mind, +which no efforts could dispel. She felt, as she rejoined the glittering +circle, the eye of the Duchess was fixed with startling earnestness upon +her, and she shrunk from that severe look, as if indeed it could +penetrate her soul and condemn the past. Why did not enjoyment return? +Why was she not happy when in the centre of a scene like this? She knew +not, and struggled to be gay and animated as usual; but she felt as if +each effort failed, and drew upon her the attention of those near her, +and rejoiced was she indeed when the festive hours had fled, and she was +alone. She strove to compose her troubled thoughts to prayer, but no +words came to her aid, and throwing herself on her bed, she wept for +many weary hours. She could not have told why she thus wept; she only +knew that she was wretched, that the light-heartedness once so +peculiarly her own had fled, it seemed, for ever, and she shrunk almost +in loathing from the hour when she should meet Lord Alphingham again; +and when it came, even his presence cheered her not. He soothed, even +gently reproached, but as he did so there was somewhat in his eye she +had never seen before, and which struck terror. Subdued as it was it +told of passions from which she had believed him exempt, and added +additional pain to her distress. Noticing what she termed the +indisposition of her young friend, the Duchess kindly advised her to +remain quiet, nor join the gay party, till it had passed away; but as +she spoke, Caroline observed the severe and scrutinizing glance of the +Duchess again fixed upon her, and, contrary to her advice, appeared as +usual at dinner. + +Days passed, and Lord Alphingham's plan was matured, and submitted to +Caroline's sanction. A _fete_, similar to that given by the Duchess, +only commencing at a later hour, to permit a superb display of fireworks +on the grounds, was to be given by a neighbouring nobleman, to which all +the members of the Duchess's party were invited. The villa was some few +miles off, and they were to leave Airslie at half-past eight. That day +Caroline was to feign indisposition, and remain undisturbed at home; at +ten Lord Alphingham would dispatch a trusty servant, well disguised, +with a note, apparently from Mrs. Hamilton, requesting her daughter's +immediate return, as she had been taken suddenly and dangerously ill. +This note was, of course, designed to impose upon any member of the +party who might, by some mischance, remain at home, and be circulated +among the servants to account for her sudden departure. The carriage, +said to be Mr. Hamilton's, waited for her; Lord Alphingham was to meet +it at some five miles off; but once within it, once safe from Airslie, +the rest was easy. + +Caroline heard, and an inward shuddering crept chilly through her frame. +Faintly and briefly she agreed to all he so eloquently and persuasively +pleaded, and instantly left him. + +"Will she be weak enough now to waver?" thought Alphingham. "Perhaps, +after all, she is not worthy of all this trouble, there is no spirit in +her; yet she is so beautiful, it will suit me well to introduce such a +lovely creature as my bride next season, and gratify my vengeance on Mr. +Hamilton for his unceremonious refusal, and if I get tired of her, if +then tears and pale cheeks continue, why, thank heaven, no chains with +me are binding. That early folly of mine was not so useless as it +seemed; I may act as I please, and if your daughter sickens or offends +me, Mr. Hamilton, as you have done, you may well dread my vengeance, it +will fall upon you both, and I unscathed will seek other lands and +fairer beauties, as I have already done." His countenance had darkened +during this speech, but at its close it became clear again, and, with a +careless whistle of unconcern, he sauntered away. + +And was it to this man that the cherished child of so much anxiety was +about to sacrifice herself--with him and for him, she, who had once been +the soul of truth and honour, had consented to leave the guardianship of +her father, and break the sacred links of nature? Alas! though her very +spirit now revolted, she had gone too far. How could she, how dared she +draw back? and yet one effort she would make. She would implore him to +permit her to confess all to her parents; she was convinced, did they +know how much her happiness depended on her union with him, they would +consent, and with their blessing hallow their marriage. +Happiness--Caroline shuddered; the wild excitement of secret love had +departed. She knew she was beloved, she had given her promise, yet she +was not happy; and could she then expect to be when irrevocably his own? +Her brain reeled beneath the bewildering chaos of her thoughts; but she +followed up her resolution, and implored him as she had intended. Lord +Alphingham heard with a dark and frowning brow. + +"And what becomes of your kind brother's just accusations?" demanded the +Viscount, with a very evident and contemptuous sneer. + +"Defend yourself, and papa will be convinced they are unfounded," was +her reply. But she gazed on his countenance, and terrified at its +expression, for the first time the thought flashed across her mind, +could there indeed be any real cause for Percy's warning; and more and +more earnestly did she beseech him to say she might implore her father's +sanction. "Only let me confide in papa and mamma, let me try and +convince them they are mistaken, and Percy too must be in error." + +The Viscount for some little time endeavoured mildly to confute her +arguments, and convince her that in doing so, she was only forming her +own misery; but still she pleaded, and ungoverned fury at length burst +forth. He had been too long the victim of passions always to keep them +in bounds, even when most required; and for a few minutes they spurned +restraint, and Caroline beheld him as he was, and saw in dim perspective +the blackened future. She would have broken from him, but he detained +her, and with a rapid transition of mood humbled himself before her, and +with impassioned fervour and deep contrition besought her forgiveness, +her pity. It was his fervid love, his fear of losing her, that bade him +thus forget himself, and he conjured her not to condemn him to +everlasting misery; that he was wretched enough already at having caused +her one moment's pain. He spoke, and his softened voice, his imploring +eyes, his protestations of unalterable love and gratitude, if she would +but trust to his affections, and be his own as he proposed, had in a +degree their effect. She was convinced it would only bring forth misery +now to implore the sanction and blessing of her parents, and promised to +resign all idea of so doing. But vainly she strove to forget that burst +of ungoverned passion she had witnessed; it haunted her sleeping and +waking thoughts, and his protestations of devoted love were dimmed +beside it, they shared its blackened hue. + +The appointed day came, and the Duchess, without question or remark, +accepted Caroline's excuse for not accompanying her and her friends to +the expected _fete_. The heavy eyes and pale cheeks of the misguided +girl were more than sufficient excuse; she even seconded Caroline in +refusing the kind offer of Lady Annie and Lady Lucy Melville to remain +with her. She said she preferred being quite alone, as she was no +companion for any one, and it appeared as if not even that obstacle +would arise to prevent her flight. + +The hours wore on; the noble guests could speak of nothing but the +anticipated _fete_ and its attendant pleasures, while they whiled away +the intervening hours in the library, the music-room, the garden, +wherever their taste dictated, for freedom was ever the password of +Airslie; but Caroline joined them not. It was the second day that she +had not seen the Viscount; for, fearing to attract notice, he had never +made his visits unusually frequent, and well versed in intrigue, he had +carried on his intercourse with Caroline in impenetrable secrecy. More +than once in those lonely hours did she feel as if her brain reeled, and +become confused, for she could not banish thought. She had that morning +received letters from home, and in her present mood each line breathed +affection, which her now awakened conscience told her was undeserved. +Nature and reason had resumed their sway, as if to add their tortures to +the anguish of those hours. The misery which had been her portion, since +her acceptance of Lord Alphingham, had slowly but surely drawn the +blinding film from her eyes. The light of reason had broke upon them +with a lustre that would no more be darkened. At the same moment that +she knew she did not love Lord Alphingham, her conduct to her parents, +to St. Eval, appeared in their true colours. Yes! this was no fancy, she +had been the victim of infatuation, of excitement; but clearer and +clearer dawned the truth. She was sacrificing herself to one whom she +did not love, whom she had never loved, with whom her life would be a +dreary waste; and for this was she about to break the ties of nature, +fly from her parents, perhaps draw down upon her head their curse, or, +what she now felt would be worse, much worse, wring that mother's heart +with anguish, whose conduct, now that reason had resumed her throne, she +was convinced had been ever guided by the dictates of affection. She +recalled with vivid clearness her every interview with Annie, and she +saw with bitter self-reproach her own blindness and folly, in thus +sacrificing her own judgment to false reasoning, in withdrawing her +confidence and affection from the mother who had never once deceived +her, to bestow them on one who had played upon her foolish weakness, +heightened her scarcely-dawning fancy till it became infatuation, and +finally recommended that plan of conduct from which Caroline's whole +soul revolted. Why had she done this? Caroline felt, to bring down shame +upon her head and suffering on her mother. Her parents' conduct changed +towards her--oh! had not hers changed to them? had she not acted from +the first of Annie's arrival in London as if under the influence of some +spell? and now that it was rudely broken, recollections of the past +mingled with and heightened her present sufferings. Her childhood, her +early youth rushed like a torrent on her mind; faulty as they had been, +they were innocent and pure compared with her present self. Then she +had been ever actuated by truth, candour, respectful love, affectionate +confidence towards her parents; now all had been cast aside. If her +mother's words were true, and bitterly she felt they were, that her +conduct to St. Eval had been one continued falsehood, what would her +parents feel when her intercourse with Lord Alphingham was discovered. +Lord Alphingham--she shuddered as his name rose to her lips. Her heart +yearned with passionate intensity towards her mother, to hear her voice +in blessing, to see her beaming smile, and feel her kiss of approbation, +such as at Oakwood she had so often received: she longed in utter +wretchedness for them. That night she was wilfully to cast them off for +ever, flee as a criminal from all she loved; and if she could return +home, confess all, would that confiding love ever be hers again? She +shrunk in trembling terror from her father's sternness, her mother's +look of woe, struggling with severity, the coldness, the displeasure she +would excite--on all sides she beheld but misery; but to fly with Lord +Alphingham, to bind herself for ever with one, whom every passing hour +told her she did not, could not love--oh, all, all, even death itself, +were preferable to that! The words of her brother sounded incessantly in +her ears: "If you value my sister's future peace, let her be withdrawn +from his society." How did she know that those words were wholly without +foundation? the countenance of the Viscount as he had alluded to them +confirmed them to her now awakened eye. Was she about to wed herself to +crime? She remembered the perfect justness, the unwavering charity of +her father, and in those softened moments she felt assured he would not +have condemned him without good cause. Why, oh, why had she thus +committed herself? where was she to turn for succour? where look for aid +to guard her from the fate she had woven for herself? Where, in her +childish faults, had her mother taught her to seek for assistance and +forgiveness? Dare she address her Maker, the God whom, in those months +of infatuated blindness, she had deserted; Him, whom her deception +towards her parents had offended, for she had trampled on His holy laws, +she had honoured them not? + +The hour of seven chimed; three hours more, and her fate was irrevocably +sealed--the God of her youth profaned; for could she ever address Him +again when the wife of Alphingham? from whose lips no word of religion +ever came, whose most simple action had lately evinced contempt for its +forms and restrictions. The beloved guardians of her infant years, the +tender friends of her youth insulted, lowered by her conduct in the +estimation of the world, liable to reproach; their very devotion for so +many years to their children condemned, ridiculed. An inseparable bar +placed between her and the hand-in-hand companions of her youth; never +again should she kneel with them around their parents, and with them +share the fond impressive blessing. Oakwood and its attendant innocence +and joys, had they passed away for ever? She thought on the anguish that +had been her mother's, when in her childhood she had sinned, and what +was she now about to inflict? She saw her bowed down in the depth of +misery; she heard her agonized prayer for mercy on her child. + +"Saviour of my mother, for her sake, have mercy on her unworthy child! +oh, save me from myself, restore me to my mother!" and sinking on her +knees, the wretched girl buried her face in her hands, and minutes, +which to her appeared like hours, rolled on in that wild burst of +repentant and remorseful agony. + + + + +CHAPTER VII. + + +"Dearest mother, this is indeed like some of Oakwood's happy hours," +exclaimed Emmeline, that same evening, as with childish glee she had +placed herself at her mother's feet, and raised her laughing eyes to her +face, with an expression of fond confiding love. + +She and Ellen were sitting alone with Mrs. Hamilton, Miss Harcourt being +engaged at a friend's, and Mr. Hamilton having been summoned after +dinner to a private interview with his solicitor on the Myrvin affairs. + +The lovely evening was slowly wearing on to twilight, and the sky, +shadowed as it was by the towering mansions of Berkeley Square, yet bore +all the rich hues which had attended the repose of a brilliant setting +sun. The balcony of the drawing-room where they were sitting was filled +with, flowers, and the window being thrown widely open, the gentle +breeze of summer filled the room with their sweet fragrance. It was that +hour of evening when even London is somewhat hushed. Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton had been more at home since Caroline's visit to Airslie, but +yet not one evening had so vividly reminded Emmeline of her dear Oakwood +as the present; it was thus in twilight she had often sought her mother, +and given vent, by a thousand little innocent devices, to the warm +emotions that filled her heart. + +Ellen had been standing by the flowers, but on hearing her cousin's +exclamation, she too had established herself on the couch by her aunt, +and added-- + +"You are right, dear Emmeline; it is indeed." + +There was an anxiety on Mrs. Hamilton's heart, which she could not +define; but was yet unable to resist the innocent happiness of her young +companions, and twining her arm playfully round Ellen, she abandoned her +other hand to Emmeline, and answered-- + +"I am very glad, my dear children, that such a simple thing as my +company can afford you so much pleasure." + +"It is so very rare now to have you thus all alone, mamma, can it be +otherwise than delight? I do not even want papa yet, we three make such +a comfortable party." + +"You are exceedingly polite to my uncle, Emmeline. I have a good mind to +tell him when he rejoins us," said Ellen, laughing. + +"Do so, my mischievous cousin, and I shall get a kiss for your pains. I +know where mamma's thoughts are, though she is trying to be as merry as +we are; she wants another to make this Oakwood hour complete." + +"I ought not to wish for your sister, my love, she is happier where she +is than she would be here, particularly to-night, for Lord D-- gives a +splendid _fete_ at his beautiful villa, similar to that given by the +Duchess ten days ago at which I should think Caroline must have been +delighted, though she wrote but little of it." + +"There is a tone in her letters, mamma, that tells me she will be as +pleased as ourselves to be at Oakwood again, though, she may fancy +_fetes_, assemblies, and a long list of et ceteras, are the most +delightful things in existence; and do you know, mamma, I will not +permit you to say you ought not to wish for her, because she is happier +where she is than she would be here; it is high treason in my presence +to say or even think so." + +"I must plead guilty, then, my Emmeline, and place my case in Ellen's +hands as counsel for the defendant, or throw myself on your mercy." + +"In consideration of the peculiar happiness of this evening, I pronounce +pardon," answered Emmeline, laughing, as she kissed her mother's hand. + +"A letter we received this morning tells us of one who longs to behold +us all again, spite of the many and varied pleasures of his exciting +life, does it not, my dear aunt?" + +"It does indeed, my love. Our Edward's letters have been, ever since he +left us, sources of consolation and delight to me, though I do excite my +Ellen's jealousy at the greater length of his letters to me than of +those to her," she added, smiling. + +"My brother knows if his letters to you impart pleasure and +satisfaction, he cannot bestow greater happiness on me, however short +mine may be," answered Ellen, earnestly; "and when he writes so fully to +you and so fondly to me, I have every reason to be quite contented; his +time is not so much at his own disposal as mine is." + +"I wonder where he can find time to write such lengthy epistles to +mamma," observed the smiling Emmeline. "I peeped over her shoulder this +morning as she was reading, and was astounded to perceive it was +written nearly as closely as mine would be. I wonder how he manages, +sailors are said to be such bad correspondents." + +"Have you forgotten what I used so repeatedly to say to you, when you +were a lazy little girl, Emmeline, and were ever ready to escape +disagreeable tasks, by saying you were quite sure you never could +succeed--Where there's a will there's a way?'" + +"Indeed, I have not forgotten it, dear mamma; it often comes across me +now, when I am ready to despair; and so I shall just read it to Master +Ned when he returns, as a lecture for not writing to me." + +"Nay, Emmeline, that would be demanding too much from our young sailor; +there is moderation in everything, you know." + +"Not in me, mamma," answered Emmeline, laughing. "You know I am always +in extremes, up in the skies one minute, and down, down on the lowest +earth the next. I sometimes wish I was like Ellen, always unruffled, +always calm and collected. You will go through the world better than I +shall, my quiet cousin." + +"Shall I?" replied Ellen, faintly smiling. But Mrs. Hamilton could +perceive that which the thoughtless Emmeline regarded not, a deep +crimson staining apparently with pain the pale fair cheek of her niece, +and she thought not with her daughter. + +"And how much longer does Ned intend being away from us?" demanded +Emmeline, after a long pause. + +"He cannot give us any idea yet," answered her mother; "perhaps some +time next year. They were to cruise off the shores of South America +these autumnal months, and winter, Edward thinks, off Buenos Ayres. He +is pleased at this, as he will see so very much more of the New World +than he expected, when he left us.'" + +"What an entertaining companion he will be when he returns," exclaimed +Emmeline. + +"Or rather ought to be, Emmeline," remarked Ellen, quietly. + +"Now, what an insinuation! Ellen, you are too bad to-night, and against +your brother, of all persons in the world. It is just like the ill +compliment you paid him on his gallantry in saving the Syren and all her +crew--absolutely would not believe that your brother Edward and the +young hero of my tale were one and the same person." + +"I can forgive her scepticism then," said Mrs. Hamilton, affectionately. +"The extraordinary efforts you described were indeed almost beyond +credence, when known to have been those of a lad but just seventeen; but +I hope my Ellen is no longer a sceptic as to the future fame and honour +of her brother," she added, kindly addressing her niece. + +"Oh, I dare not indulge in one half the bright visions, the fond hopes +that will intrude themselves upon my mind for him," exclaimed Ellen, +with involuntary energy. + +"Why, Ellen, are you sometimes a victim to the freaks of imagination as +well as myself?" asked her cousin, laughing. + +"I have frequently compelled myself to seek active employment," answered +Ellen, "lest those hopes should be indeed but fading visions, and my +disappointment more painfully bitter." + +"You do your brother injustice in even fancying disappointment," said +her aunt, playfully, "and I must act as defendant for the absent. I +believe, say, and protest my firm belief, that the name of Edward +Fortescue will stand one of the highest in naval fame, both as a +commander and a man. The naval honour of my family will, I feel assured, +have a worthy representative in my noble nephew, and I will not have one +word breathed in doubt or mistrust on the subject." + +"If you think so, then I may hope indeed," Ellen said with earnestness. +"And the recollection of the past"-- + +"Must heighten anticipations for the future, my dear girl, or I must +sentence them to perpetual banishment. Condemn them never to be +recalled," interrupted Mrs. Hamilton, still more playfully, and then +added-- + +"Emmeline, have you no wish to know how the object of your kind +sympathy, poor Lilla, parted from her father and me to day?" + +"I quite forgot all about it, mamma; this Oakwood hour has made me so +selfish. I thought of no one but ourselves," replied Emmeline. "Gratify +my curiosity now. Did Lady Helen evince any sorrow at the separation?" + +"Not so much as, for Lilla's sake, I could have wished. She has been so +unfortunately prejudiced against her both by Annie and Miss Malison, +that although I am convinced she loves her child, she never will evince +any proof of it; and Lilla's unhappy temperament has, of course, +increased this prejudice, which I fear will require years to remove, +unless Annie be soon married, and Miss Malison removed from Lady +Helen's establishment. Then Lilla's really excellent qualities will +quickly be made evident." + +"Mr. Grahame is already convinced she is a very different girl to that +she has been represented, is he not?" asked Ellen. + +"He is; and I trust, from the awakened knowledge, happiness is dawning +upon them both. I could not see unmoved his struggle to part with her +to-day, brief as the separation will be--scarcely six short months." + +"I was quite sure Mr. Grahame loved his children, though Annie and Cecil +did say so much about his sternness," said Emmeline, somewhat +triumphantly. + +"Mr. Grahame's feelings are naturally the very wannest, but +disappointment in some of his dearest hopes has, in some cases, +unfortunately caused him to veil them; I regret this, both for Cecil and +Lilla's sake, as I think, had he evinced greater interest and affection +for them in their childish years, they might both have been different in +character." + +"But it is not too late now?" + +"I trust not for Lilla, but I greatly fear, from all I have heard, that +Cecil's character is already formed. Terrified at his father's +harshness, he has always shrunk from the idea of making him his friend, +and has associated only with the young men of his mother's family, who, +some few years older than himself, and devoted to fashion, and gay +amusements, are not the very best companions he could have selected, but +whose near relationship seems to have prevented all interference on the +part of Mr. Grahame. Cecil must now be sixteen, and I fear no alteration +in his father's conduct will efface the impressions already received." + +"But, changed as Mr. Grahame is towards Lilla, was it still necessary +for her to go to Mrs. Douglas? Could not her reformation have been +effected equally well at home?" + +"No, my love; her father delighted at finding he had engaged her +affections, and that some of the representations he had heard were +false, would, in all probability, have gone to the contrary extreme, and +indulged her as much, if not more, than he had previously neglected her. +Lilla has very many faults, which require steady yet not harsh +correction, and which from her earliest age demanded the greatest care; +being neglected, they have strengthened with her years. The discipline +she will now be under will at first be irksome, and perhaps Lilla may +find all I have said in Mrs. Douglas's favour very contrary to reality; +but I have such a good opinion of her docility, when reasoned with +kindly, that I do not doubt all such impressions will be effaced when +she visits us at Christmas." + +"Well, however kind Mrs. Douglas may be, I should not like to be in +Lilla's place," observed Emmeline, and then added, with her usual +animation, "Ah, mamma, how can we ever be sufficiently grateful to you +for never sending us from you? I might have loved you very dearly, but I +could not have looked upon you as my best and dearest friend, as I do +now." + +"It is sufficient recompense for all my care that you do look on me +thus, my sweet child," exclaimed Mrs. Hamilton, with involuntary +emotion, and she bent down to impress a kiss on Emmeline's forehead as +she spoke, that she might conceal an unusual tear which had started to +her eye, for the unrestrained confidence and unabated affection of her +younger daughter, while it soothed, yet rendered the conduct of +Caroline by its contrast more painful; and, almost unconsciously, she +added-- + +"Oh, that this confidence and affection may never change, never be +withdrawn." + +"Change!" repeated Emmeline and Ellen at the same moment; but they +checked themselves, for they knew where the thoughts of their much-loved +relative had wandered, and they felt she had indeed sufficient cause for +all her solicitude. Recovering herself almost instantly, Mrs. Hamilton +resumed the conversation in a more cheerful tone, by demanding of +Emmeline if her busy fancy had pictured how Oakwood was to look, on +their return to it in a fortnight's time. + +"She certainly must have done so," answered Ellen, laughing; "for she +has had so many reveries over her drawing and work this week, that +nothing less important could have occasioned them." + +Emmeline shook her head archly, and answered gaily; and her dear old +venerable home was the engrossing theme of conversation till the return +of Mr. Hamilton, a short time afterwards. + +"Congratulate me, all of you," he said, in a joyous tone; "my business +is proceeding most favourably. Mr. Myrvin need know nothing about it +till all is settled; the dishonourable conduct of his enemies brought to +light, and himself reinstated in his little domain, once more the +minister of Llangwillan. Thanks to the able conduct of Mr. Allan, all +will soon be made clear. As soon as we are at Oakwood, Ellen, you shall +write to Mr. Myrvin, and invite him to spend some little time with us; +and when he leaves us, I trust it will be once more for Llangwillan and +its own pretty vicarage." + +"Dear, dear uncle!" exclaimed Ellen, starting up and clinging to his +arm, "oh, how can I thank you for your interference in behalf of him who +was the first friend I knew in England? the consoler of my +mother--the"-- + +"The good man who first told us what a troublesome charge I should find +in my niece," interrupted Mrs. Hamilton, playfully. + +"I have indeed been a trouble to you," replied Ellen, with a suppressed +yet heavy sigh, and her uncle's hand dropped from her grasp. + +"Ellen!" said Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton at the same instant, in an accent of +reproach. + +"Have I not?" she continued, with unusual impetuosity. "Did I not cause +you misery, you, who from the first moment you knew me, loved mo more +than I deserved? Did I not make both of you ill in health and wretched +in mind, and yet your kindness now is greater than before? There is not +a wish--not a desire I express, but is granted on the instant; and +I--oh, I have no power to--to"-- + +"You will, at least, have the power of making me seriously displeased if +you speak in this way again, and thus turn my sportive words to gloom," +said Mrs. Hamilton, gravely, but gently drawing the agitated girl with +tenderness to her. "Come, come, Ellen, I will not have Emmeline's happy +Oakwood hour thus alloyed. You may reward me yet for all, and one day, +perhaps, make me your debtor. That may appear very impossible now," she +added, smiling, as Ellen raised her large eyes incredulously to her +face; "but more improbable things have come to pass." + +"And where is Arthur to be while his father is with us?" demanded +Emmeline, joyously, of her father. "Not as a servitor at college, I +hope." + +"No; I anticipate the pleasure of welcoming the friend of Herbert as my +guest as well as his father, and then we shall deliberate on Arthur's +future life. I should like much to place him under Mr. Howard for a +year, and then establish him in a living of Lord Malvern's, in which I +have little doubt I could succeed." + +"Well, my fancy then will indeed be gratified. I shall see this proud +persecuted youth, and judge for myself if he be deserving or not of my +brother's friendship. Do you remember him, Ellen?" + +"Perfectly well; he was so very kind to me. I well recollect his grief +when I left the village, to live, he said, in such a very different +style, that it was not likely we should ever meet again." + +"But yet, you see, improbable as it appeared, you will meet again," said +Mrs. Hamilton in a marked tone, as she smiled. + +"So you call this an Oakwood hour, Emmy, do you?" demanded Mr. Hamilton, +after Arthur and his father had been duly discussed. "Suppose we make +the resemblance even more complete by ringing for lights, and you and +Ellen giving me some music. I have had no opportunities of hearing your +improvement, which, I suppose, under such able professors, has been +something extraordinary." + +"Marvellous, most marvellous!" exclaimed Emmeline, laughing, as she flew +to obey him by ringing the bell. "I had begun to fancy I was practising +for nothing, and that my father would never do his child the honour of +listening to her again, but I remembered the enchanted halls of Oakwood, +and I thought there at least I might chain him to my side, and so I +continued my labours." + +"Let us fancy ourselves there," replied her father, smiling; and lights +appearing, Emmeline and Ellen were speedily at the instruments, +bestowing pleasure unalloyed by this domestic use of their talents to +those dear ones who had so assiduously cultivated them. Their +improvement, under the best professors in London, had been rapid; for, +carefully prepared, no difficulties had to be overcome ere improvement +commenced; and the approbation and evident pleasure of Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton amply repaid those young and innocent beings for all the +exertions they had made, particularly Emmeline, who, as we know, had +determined, on her first arrival in London, to prove she would not +learn, when all around her was so changed. + +"Surely, surely, Caroline, surrounded by gaiety as she is, cannot be as +happy as I am to-night," burst with wild glee from the lips of Emmeline, +as at about half-past ten o'clock her father kissed her glowing cheek, +and thanked her for the pleasing recreation she had given him. She had +scarcely spoken, when a carriage was heard driving somewhat rapidly +through the Square, then stopped, it appeared at their door, and a +thundering and truly aristocratic rap resounded, startling not a little +the inmates of that peaceful drawing-room. + +"Who can it be at this hour?" demanded Emmeline, in an accent of +bewilderment. "How very disagreeable. I did not wish any intrusion +to-night. Mamma, dear mamma, you look terrified." + +Mr. Hamilton had opened the drawing-room door, and was about to descend +the stairs, for he too was startled at this unusual visit; but he +turned at Emmeline's words, for his wife did not usually indulge in +unfounded alarm or anticipated fears, but at that instant her wonted +presence of mind appeared about to desert her; she was pale as marble, +and had started up in an attitude of terror. + +Voices were heard, and stops, well-known steps, ascending the stairs. + +"It is the Duchess of Rothbury's voice and step--my child!" burst from +her lips, in an accent that neither Emmeline nor Ellen ever could +forget, and she sunk back almost fainting on her seat. Her children flew +to her side in alarm, but ere a minute had passed away that wild anxiety +was calmed, for Caroline herself entered with the Duchess, but her +death-like cheek, blanched lip, and haggard eye told a tale of suffering +which that mother could not mark unmoved. Vainly Mrs. Hamilton strove to +rise and welcome the Duchess: she had no power to move from her chair. + +"Caroline, my child!" were the only words her faltering tongue could +utter; and that agonized voice thrilled through the heart of the now +truly unhappy girl, and roused her from that trance of overwhelming +emotion which bade her stand spell-bound at the threshold. She sprung +forward, and sinking at her mother's feet, buried her face in her robe. + +"Mother, my injured mother, oh, do not, do not hate me!" she murmured, +in a voice almost inarticulate. "I deserve to be cast from your love, to +lose your confidence for ever. I have deceived you--I--" Sobs choked her +utterance, and the grieving mother could only throw her arms around her +child, and press her convulsively to her heart. Anxiety, nearly equal +to that of his wife, had been an inmate of Mr. Hamilton's bosom as the +Duchess's voice reached his ear; but as he glanced on Caroline, a frown +gathered on his brow. He trembled involuntarily, for he felt assured it +was imprudence, to give it the mildest term, in her conduct that called +for this untimely visit, this strange return to her home. Already he had +been deceived; and while every softened feeling struggled for mastery in +the mother's bosom, the father stood ready to judge and to condemn, +fiercely conquering every rising emotion that swelled within. There was +even more lofty majesty in the carriage of her Grace, as she carefully +closed the drawing-room door behind her, and slowly advanced towards +Mrs. Hamilton; a cold, severe, unbending expression in every feature, +that struck terror to the hearts of both Emmeline and Ellen, whose +innocent festivity was indeed now rudely checked. + +"Mrs. Hamilton," the Duchess said, and the grave and sad accents of her +voice caused the anxious mother hastily to raise her head, and gaze +inquiringly in her face, "to my especial care you committed your child. +I promised to guard her as my own, and on that condition alone you +entrusted her to me; I alone, therefore, restore her to you, thank God, +unscathed. I make no apology for this strange and apparently needless +intrusion at this late hour; deceived as I have been, my house was no +longer a fitting home for your daughter, and not another night could I +retain her, when my judgment told me her father's watchful guardianship +alone could protect her from the designing arts of one, of whom but very +little is known, and that little not such as would recommend him to my +favour. You, too, have been deceived, cruelly deceived, by that weak, +infatuated girl. Had you been aware that Lord Alphingham was her +secretly favoured lover, that the coldness with which she ever treated +him in public, the encouragement of another, were but to conceal from +you and her father her attachment to him, you would not have consented +to her joining a party of which he was a member. At my house he has +received increased encouragement. I marked them with a jealous eye, for +I could not believe his attentions sanctioned either by you or Mr. +Hamilton; but even my vigilance was at fault, for she had consented to +sever every tie which bound her to her too indulgent parents, and fly +with him to Scotland. This night would have seen the accomplishment of +their design. Had one of my children behaved thus, it would have been +less a matter of bewilderment to me than such conduct in a daughter of +yours. I have neglected to seek their confidence, their affection. You +have never rested in your endeavours to obtain both, and therefore, that +such should be your recompense is sad indeed. I sympathise with you, my +dearest friend," she continued, in a tone of much more feeling than she +ever allowed to be visible. "In the tale of shame I am repeating, I am +inflicting misery upon you, I feel I am; and yet, in resigning my +charge, I must do my duty, and set you on your guard, and let this one +reflection be your comfort, that it was the recollection of your +untiring care, your constant affection, which checked this infatuated +girl in her career of error, and bade her pause ere it was too late. For +her sufferings I have little pity; she is no longer the character I +believed her. Neither integrity, honour, nor candour can be any longer +inmates of her heart; the confession I have heard this night has +betrayed a lengthened scheme of deception, to which, had I heard it of +her, I should have given no credence. Forgive me, my dear Emmeline, and +look not on me so beseechingly; painful as it is, in the sincerest +friendship alone I place before your too partial eyes the real character +of your child. I have now done my duty, and will therefore leave you. +God bless you, and grant you strength to bear this bitter trial." She +turned to the unhappy father, who, as she spoke, had, overcome with +uncontrollable agitation, sunk on a chair and covered his face with his +hands, but with a strong effort he roused himself as she pronounced his +name, and rose. + +"Mr. Hamilton, to your wife, your inestimable wife, you owe the +preservation of your child this night from sin. Let her not, I beseech +you, afflict herself too deeply for those sufferings under which she may +behold Caroline for a time the victim. She deserves them all--all; but +she merits not one half that affection which her fond and loving mother +would lavish on her. I leave you now, but, trust me, feeling deeply for +you both." + +"Nay, rest with us to night, at least," exclaimed Mr. Hamilton, +conquering himself sufficiently to think of his friend's situation, +alone, in London, at such a late hour, and endeavouring to persuade her +to remain with them; but decidedly, yet kindly, she refused. + +"I sleep at St. James's, and shall be back at Airslie to-morrow morning +before my guests are recovered from the effects of to-night," she urged. +"Your hospitality is kindly meant, Hamilton, but I cannot accept it; +both Caroline and her mother can dispense with my company now." + +"Then let me accompany you home?" + +"I will not hear of it, my good friend. Good night, once more; God bless +you!" + +Mr. Hamilton knew the character of his noble friend too well to urge +more, and therefore contented himself by accompanying her down stairs. + +To describe Mrs. Hamilton's feelings, as she listened to the words of +the Duchess, would be indeed a vain attempt. We know all the anguish she +had suffered when Caroline's conduct had first caused her uneasiness, +and now the heightened agony of her fond heart may be easily imagined. +Almost unconsciously she had withdrawn her arm; but Caroline clung more +convulsively to her robe, and her first wild words sounded again and +again in her mother's ears, soothing while they inflicted pain. + +"Can it be possible I have heard aright? Have I indeed been thus +deceived?" she asked, struggling to speak calmly, when the Duchess and +her husband had left the room; and she fixed her sad, searching glance +upon Caroline, who for a moment raised her head. + +"Mother, dearest mother, condemn me, despise me as you please; I deserve +it all," she replied, in an accent of most piercing wretchedness. "Only +say that I may in time regain your love, your confidence; that you will +take me to your heart again. I have disregarded your affection; I have +wilfully cast it from me. Yet--oh, if you knew all I have suffered. +Mamma, mamma, oh, speak but one word more of kindness! I know I deserve +it not, but my heart feels breaking. I have no other friend on earth +but you; oh, call me but your child again, mother!" + +Her voice utterly failed, a film suddenly obscured her sight, and a +sense of suffocation rose in her throat; the misery of the last ten +days, the wretchedness and excitement of that day had deprived her of +more strength than she was at all aware of, and with one convulsive +effort to clasp her mother's hand to her throbbing heart, she sunk +exhausted at her feet. Emmeline would have flown for assistance, but a +look from her mother bade her pause, and she remained with Ellen to seek +those restoratives that were at hand. With a throbbing heart and +trembling hand, Mrs. Hamilton raised her repentant child, and with the +assistance of Emmeline placed her tenderly on the nearest couch, +endeavouring, though for some few minutes in vain, to recall her +scattered senses. Tears fell from that fond mother's eyes upon +Caroline's deathlike features, and ere life returned she had been +pressed again and again to her heart, and repeated kisses imprinted on +her marble brow. It mattered not at that moment that she had been +deceived, that Caroline had withdrawn alike her confidence and +affection, that her conduct the last few months had been productive of +bitter disappointment and extreme anguish, all, all was forgotten; the +mother only knew her child was suffering--only felt she was restored to +her arms; again and again she kissed her erring child, beseeching her +with fond and gentle words to wake and know she was forgiven. + +Slowly Caroline recovered consciousness, and unclosing her eyes, gazed +wildly yet sadly on all by whom she was surrounded. All the father had +struggled with Mr. Hamilton, as he stood by her side during the +continuance of her swoon; but now sternness again darkened his brow, and +he would have given vent to his wounded feelings in severe though just +reproaches, but the beseeching glance, the agonized voice of his wife +arrested him. + +"Arthur, my husband, oh, for my sake, spare her now!" she passionately +exclaimed, clasping his hand in hers, and looking up in his face with +imploring earnestness. "Spare her, at least, till from her own lips we +have heard all; she is in no state to bear anger now, however deserved. +Arthur, dearest Arthur, oh, do not reproach her till we know what it is +that has caused the wretchedness, the suffering we behold! For my sake, +spare her now." + +"Mother," murmured the unhappy girl, with a powerful effort rising from +the couch, and flinging herself on Mrs. Hamilton's neck, "do not plead +for me; I do not deserve it. My conduct to you the last few months would +alone demand the severest reproaches papa could inflict; and that, oh, +that is but little to the crime I should have committed, had not the +remembrance of all your devotion rushed to my mind, and arrested me, but +a few brief hours ere it would have been too late, and I should have +sacrificed myself to a man I discovered I did not love, merely to prove +I was not a slave to your dictates, that I had a will of my own, and +with or without your consent would abide by it. I have been infatuated, +blind--led on by artful persuasion, false representations, and weakly I +have yielded. Do not weep for me, Emmeline, I am not worthy of your +tears. You would have guided me aright; you would have warned me, +advised me, but I rejected your counsel, spurned your affection; with +contempt, aversion from all, from each, do I deserve to be regarded. +Ellen, you may triumph now; I did all I could to prove how I hated and +despised you some months ago, and now, oh, how much more I have fallen. +Oh, why, why did I ever leave Oakwood?--why was I so eager to visit +London?" Exhaustion choked her voice, the vehemence with which she had +spoken overpowered her, and her mother was compelled to lead her to a +couch, and force her to sit down beside her. Mr. Hamilton spoke not; for +a few minutes he paced the room with agitated steps, and then hastily +quitted it. + +"It is so very late, you had better retire, my dear girls," Mrs. +Hamilton said, after a brief pause, addressing Emmeline and Ellen, who +yet lingered sorrowfully near her. They understood her hint, and +instantly obeyed, both affectionately but silently embracing Caroline +ere they departed; and it was a relief to Mrs. Hamilton's anxious bosom +to find herself alone with her painfully repentant child. For some time +did that interview continue; and when Caroline retired to rest, it was +with a spirit lighter than it had been for many weeks, spite of the dark +clouds she still felt were around her. All her strange wayward feelings +had been confessed. She laid no stress on those continued letters she +had received from Annie, which had from the first alienated her from her +mother. Remorse was too busy within to bid her attempt to defend herself +by inculpating others; but though she carefully avoided reference to her +misleading friend, Mrs. Hamilton could easily, very easily, perceive +from whose arts all her own misery and Caroline's present suffering +originated; and bitterly in secret she reproached herself for ever +permitting that intimacy to continue, and obtain the influence it had. +To Lord St. Eval and her conduct to him the unhappy girl also referred. +Pride was completely at an end; every question Mrs. Hamilton asked was +answered with all that candour and integrity which had once +characterised her most trifling words; and while her undisguised +confession on many points occasioned the most poignant sorrow, yet +still, as the mother listened, and gazed on those expressive features, +something whispered within her that her child would be a blessing still. +She owned that from the moment she had rejected Lord St. Eval, regret +had become so unceasing, that to escape it she had listened to and +encouraged Lord Alphingham more than she had done before; his +professions of devoted love had appeared as balm, and deadened the +reproaches of conscience. Why she had so carefully concealed from her +parents that which she imagined was love for the Viscount she could not +explain, unless it was her weakness in following the example of others, +who, she had been told, shrunk from confessing love-stories to their +mothers; or, and that Mrs. Hamilton believed much nearer the real +reason, she did not love him sufficiently to implore their consent to +his addresses. She acknowledged, when their prohibition to her +acquaintance with him was given, she had longed to confess the truth, +and implore them at least to say why she might no longer enjoy his +society; but that she had felt too indignant at what she deemed the +slavery in which she was held, and discontent and irritation then took +possession of her, instead of willing obedience. She described her +feelings when he appeared at Airslie, the many struggles she then had +with herself; and, finally, her wretchedness from the moment she had +consented to be his wife; her entreaties that he would permit her to +implore her father's consent; her agony the same evening; her fervent +prayer for forgiveness and guidance; and, at length, her determination +to elude him by setting off for home the instant the Duchess and her +party had left the villa, which intention she had endeavoured to put in +force by imploring the assistance and secrecy of her Grace's own maid to +procure her a safe carriage and fleet horses, as she was compelled to +return home that same night; she would leave a note, she said, +explaining her reason for her departure to her Grace. She fancied +Allison must have betrayed her, as, when she was every minute expecting +to hear the carriage was ready, the Duchess entered her room, and, after +a brief but stern interview, ordered her own carriage, and had herself +accompanied her to town. + +Mrs. Hamilton listened to this long sad tale without interrupting it by +a word of reproach. Not once did she speak aught that might tend to +increase the anguish under which it was so evident Caroline was +suffering. Soothingly she spoke, and that fond yet saddened tone caused +the poor girl's bursting heart to find relief in a violent flood of +tears. She clung, even as in childhood, to her mother's neck, and as she +wept, felt yet more bitterly the infatuated folly of her conduct in +having for a moment forsaken the guidance of her true and kindest +friend, for the apparently more pleasing, because flattering, confidence +of one whom she now knew to be false and utterly deceiving. + +"But may he not still claim me?" she wildly exclaimed. "Will he not hold +me up to the world as a faithless, capricious girl? I shall be the +laughing-stock of all with whom we associate. Annie is not likely to +keep my secret. Oh, why did I ever confide in her? Mother, I shall be +despised, derided. I know I have brought it on myself, but oh, how can I +bear it?" + +"We leave London so very shortly, that I trust you will not be exposed +to the derision you so much dread," replied Mrs. Hamilton, soothingly, +"and by next season I hope all floating rumours that your conduct must +occasion may have entirely passed away. You need not fear the scorn of +the circle in which we principally mingle; and that of Annie's +companions, if the dread of their laughter keep you from seeking, as you +have done, their society, forgive me, my love, if I say I shall rejoice; +for you will then no longer be exposed to example and precept contrary +to those I have endeavoured to instil." + +"But, Lord Alphingham, what will he say or do?" murmured Caroline, +almost inaudibly. + +"You must write to him, Caroline, dissolving your engagement; there is +no other way." + +"Write to him, mother, I--oh, no, no, I cannot." + +"If you do not, you will still be exposed to constant annoyance; he may +choose to believe that you were forced by compulsion to return to us. +The circumstance of the Duchess herself accompanying you to town, he +will consider as sufficient evidence. Acting on your promise, on your +avowed preference, unless you write yourself, he will leave no means +untried to succeed in his sinful schemes. Painful as is the task, or +rather more disagreeable than painful if you do not love him, no one but +yourself must write, and the sooner you do so the better." + +"But if he really loves me? How can I--how dare I inflict more pain, +more disappointment, than I have done already?" + +"Loves you!" repeated Mrs. Hamilton, and displeasure mingled in her +saddened tone; "Caroline, do not permit yourself to be thus egregiously +deceived. He may fancy that he does, but it is no true honourable love; +if it were, would he thus bear you by stealth from the friend to whom +you were intrusted? If his conscience were indeed free from all stain, +would he have refused your entreaties that you might confess your love +to us, and beseech our blessing on your union? Would he have shrunk from +defending his conduct according to your advice? Nay, more; if this +accusation, which he has traced by some means to Percy, were indeed +unfounded and unjust, do you think he would have refrained one moment +from coming forward and asserting, not only by word but by proof, his +unblemished innocence? His silence is to me the clearest proof of +conduct that will not bear investigation; and I tremble to think what +miseries, what wretchedness might have been your portion, had you indeed +consented to his unworthy proposal." Her voice faltered, and she drew +the still weeping girl closer to her, as if her maternal love should +protect her from every evil. Caroline answered not, and after a few +minutes Mrs. Hamilton said, with tenderness-- + +"You do not repent your decision, my own child? You do not regret that +you have returned to those who love and cherish you so fondly? Speak to +me, love." + +Convulsively Caroline's hand pressed her mother's as if that pressure +should say nothing more should part them; then suddenly sinking on her +knees before her, she forced back the choking sobs, and said, clearly +and distinctly--- + +"Mother, I dare no longer ask you to believe my simple word, as in +former years you would have done, I have deceived you too long, too +culpably for that; but now, on my knees, solemnly, sacredly I swear, I +will never marry without papa's and your consent. I dare no longer trust +myself; I have once been rendered blind by that sinful craving for +freedom from all authority, for unchecked independence of thought and +word and deed, and never, never more will I stand forth in my own +weakness. My fate is in your hands, for never will I marry without your +blessing; and may that vow be registered above as solemnly as it is now +taken. Mother, you will not refuse to accept it," she added, laying her +trembling hand on Mrs. Hamilton's, and gazing beseechingly in her face. + +"I will not, my child!" and her mother struggled severely to conquer her +emotion and speak calmly. "Tell me only it is in my affection you +confide, that it is not under feelings of remorse alone you have made +this solemn vow. Promise me you will no longer permit a doubt of my +affection and interest in your happiness to enter your mind and poison +your confidence in me, as it has done. From that doubt all the present +misery has proceeded. You have imagined your parents harsh and cruel, +while they have only thought of your welfare. Say only you will trust in +our affection, my child, my own Caroline." + +"Oh, that I had ever trusted in it. My blindness and folly concealed +from me my misconduct, and bade me ascribe all my sufferings to you, on +whom I have inflicted so much pain. Mother, oh, forgive me, plead for +me to papa. I know he is seriously displeased, he has every right to be +so; but he knows not all I have endured, the agony of the last week. I +deserve his severest reproaches, but my heart feels as if it would break +beneath his anger now," and she laid her aching head on her mother's +lap, and wept. + +"My forgiveness, my blessing, are both yours, my own. Do not weep thus," +replied Mrs. Hamilton, imprinting a kiss on that burning forehead. "And +your father too, when he has heard all, will not withhold his love." + +"I will write to Lord Alphingham now, mother; it is useless to defer it, +and my mind will not regain its peace till it is done," exclaimed +Caroline, after a brief pause, which had followed her mother's words. + +"Not now, my love, you are too agitated still," replied her mother, +gazing anxiously on her flushed cheek; "wait till sleep shall have +calmed this inward fever, and restored you to composure. I do not think +you can write it now." + +"I cannot sleep till I have, mamma, indeed I cannot. I ought to have +left it for him before I quitted Airslie, but I could then think of +nothing but the ardent longing to see you, to hear your voice again; let +me write now." + +And believing her words were true, that in all probability she would not +sleep while that letter was on her mind, Mrs. Hamilton made no further +objection, and rose to place the inkstand and portfolio on a table near +her. Caroline remained still kneeling, and by her attitude Mrs. Hamilton +fancied was engaged in secret prayer; her tears were checked as she +rose, and it was with firmness she walked to the table and drew a seat +beside it. Anxiously for a few minutes did her mother watch her as she +wrote. At first her hand appeared to tremble, but a successful effort +conquered that emotion, and the increasing flush upon her cheek alone +proclaimed the agitation of her mind. So deeply was she engrossed in her +painful task, that she did not observe her mother had left the room, and +remained absent for a few minutes, returning, however, before she had +finished her letter. Without looking up, she placed the paper in Mrs. +Hamilton's hands, and, leaning her arms on the table, buried her face in +her hands. + +Mrs. Hamilton folded the letter in perfect silence; but then taking the +hand of her daughter from her eyes, she pressed it in hers, and said, in +a voice of deep emotion-- + +"I am satisfied, my child. Let this letter be directed and sealed with +your own hand, and the name of Lord Alphingham shall never again pass my +lips. It is enough that duty and affection have triumphed over his +intentions. I know not all the evil that might have been yours had he +succeeded, but you are restored to me, and may God forgive him as freely +as I do." + +With a steady hand Caroline directed and placed her own seal to the +letter; and then, exhausted by the agitation of that evening, she leaned +her throbbing head against her mother. + +"Caroline, my child!" exclaimed a deep and saddened voice beside her. +She started, and looking up, beheld her father, who had been gazing at +her an unobserved spectator for the last half hour. + +"Forgive me, dearest father. Oh, let me not sleep to-night without your +forgiveness. Mamma will not cast me from her heart; she has blessed me, +and I have injured her even more than you. Papa, dear papa, oh, speak to +me but one word of fondness!" she entreated, as her father drew her to +his bosom, and as she ceased, mingled his blessing and forgiveness in +that warm embrace. + +It was late, so late, that the early morn was beginning to gild the +horizon before Mrs. Hamilton had seen her agitated child placed in bed, +and persuaded her to compose her spirits and invite sleep. Fondly her +mother watched beside her till the grey dawn had penetrated within the +room; and then perceiving that calm, sleep had come at length, she +retired to her own apartment. There sinking on her knees, her +overcharged heart found blessed relief in pouring forth to Heaven its +fervent thanksgiving for that great mercy vouchsafed her in the +restoration of her child. The anguish of the past, the suffering of the +present were alike forgotten, in the thought that Caroline's affection +and confidence were again restored to her. The veil had at length been +removed from her eyes. Annie's character was revealed before her and the +sorrowful and repentant girl had once more sought for sympathy in the +bosom of her mother. She now felt that mother was her truest friend, and +a glow of sweet and soothing pleasure stole over Mrs. Hamilton's mind at +this conviction. Caroline had said it was the recollection of her +mother's care, devotion, and love that had stayed her, ere it was too +late. She could not banish from her heart the duty therein so long and +carefully implanted; the principles of religion, of virtue, shaken as +they had been in that painful moment of indecision, had preserved her +from misery. Often, very often, Mrs. Hamilton had felt disheartened, +almost despairing in her task, during both the childhood and youth of +Caroline, but now her recompense was apparent. Had she not persevered, +had she been indolent or careless in the discharge of her duty, had she +left the care of that child to strangers, who would never have thus +studied or guided so difficult a disposition, there would have been +naught to bid her pause. She would have done as others too often do, and +fearful indeed would have been her chastisement. Now, what were all Mrs. +Hamilton's self-conquering struggles, all the pain she had suffered, +compared with the exquisite happiness of feeling that her care had +preserved her child, and she knew not as yet from what depth of +wretchedness? Fervent was the gratitude for that grace which had +permitted her to guide her child aright; and as she recalled the +heartfelt approbation of her conduct, which her beloved husband had +gratefully expressed, happiness filled her heart, and many, very many +might have envied that noble woman her feelings, as she laid her head on +her pillow that night, when sleep only hushed the still lingering +thanksgiving on her lips. + +It may be well here briefly to relate all that had passed at Airslie, +from the moment we left Caroline imploring pardon and guidance from Him, +to whom she had never appealed in vain, to that when she so suddenly +appeared in company with the Duchess in Berkeley Square. To accede to +Lord Alphingham's wishes, she felt was no longer possible, but how to +avoid him was a matter of still greater difficulty. To accompany the +Duchess and thus elude him, she could not, for she felt neither her +strength nor spirits could sustain her through the whole of that festive +night. Each minute as it passed increased the fever of her brain, at +length in despair she determined on the conduct with which we are +already acquainted. As soon as the last carriage had rolled from the +door she summoned Allison, the Duchess's own maid, and in accents that +painfully betrayed the agitation within, implored her to procure her a +carriage and fleet horses, as circumstances had occurred which obliged +her instantly to return to town. She besought her neither to question +her nor to speak of her sudden resolution to any one, as the note she +would leave behind for her Grace would fully explain all. Allison +remained for some few minutes gazing on the agitated girl, in motionless +astonishment. + +"Return to London at such a time of night, and alone," she rather +allowed to drop from her lips than said, after a long pause. + +"Oh, would to heaven some one would go with me! but I know none whom I +can ask," Caroline replied, in a tone of anguish, and seizing Allison's +hand, again and again implored her assistance. Briefly she promised to +do all she could for her, and left her, not to do her bidding by seeking +some conveyance, but to report the strange request and still more +alarming manner of Caroline to her Grace; who, for some secret reason, +which her daughters and friends in vain endeavoured to solve, had at the +very last moment declared her intention of not accompanying them, and +wishing them, with the utmost kindness, a pleasant evening, commissioned +Lady Lucy and her eldest brother, who had lately joined them, to supply +her place in their own party, and tender her excuses to the noble master +of the _fete_. The simple truth was, that the penetration of the Duchess +had observed and detected from the very first the manoeuvres of Lord +Alphingham and Caroline. + +The former, as may have already been discovered, was one of those +against whom her prejudice was very strong. With her own free will, Lord +Alphingham would never have visited at her house, although she was never +heard to breathe one word to his disadvantage; especially invited he +never was, and in heart she was much annoyed at her husband's marked +preference and encouragement of his society. She had observed her friend +Mrs. Hamilton's coldness towards him; and as much as she admired the +conduct of the mother, so she sometimes found herself mistrusting the +studied air and guarded reserve with which Caroline ever treated the +Viscount. The sudden change in Mr. Hamilton's manner had also struck +her, and therefore, when Alphingham joined her coterie, not once did she +ever fail in the jealous watchfulness with which she regarded him and +Caroline. Rendered suspicious by all that she had observed, Caroline's +determination not to join the party that evening had increased her +uneasiness to a degree that almost amounted to alarm, and that very +instant her resolution was fixed to remain at Airslie. She desired +Allison not to mention her intention of remaining to Miss Hamilton, but +to inform her minutely of all that passed during the evening; and her +astonishment was almost as great as her domestic's had been when +Caroline's desire was related to her. + +It wanted but one half hour to the time appointed by the Viscount, and +Caroline still sat in a state of anxiety and suspense, which tortured +her almost to frenzy. Unable to bear it longer, her hand was on the bell +once more to summon Allison, when the lock of the door turned, and +starting forwards, the words, "Is all ready--have you succeeded?" were +arrested on her lips by the appearance of the Duchess herself, who, +closing the door, stood gazing on the terrified girl with a glance of +severity and command few could have met unmoved. Scarcely conscious of +what she did, Caroline started back, and, sinking on a stool at the +farthest end of the room, covered her face with her hands. + +"May I know with what intent Miss Hamilton is about to withdraw herself +from my roof and my protection?" she demanded, in those brief yet +searching tones she ever used when displeased. "What reason she can +allege for this unceremonious departure from a house where she has ever +been regarded as one of its most favoured inmates? Your mother trusted +you to my care, and on your duty to her I demand an answer." She +continued, after a brief pause, in which Caroline neither moved nor +spoke, "Where would you go at this unseasonable hour?" + +"Home to my mother," murmured the unhappy girl, in a voice almost +inarticulate. + +"Home!" repeated her Grace, in a bitterly satirical tone. "Strange, that +you should thus suddenly desire to return. Were you not the child of +those to whom equivocation is unknown, I might well doubt that +tale;--home, and wherefore?" + +"To save myself from the effects of my own sinful folly--my own +infatuated madness," replied Caroline, summoning with a strong effort +all the energy of her character, and with a vehemence that flushed her +pallid cheek with crimson. "In this at least I am sincere, though in all +else I deserve no longer to be regarded as the child of such +noble-minded beings as are my parents. Spurn me from you as you will, +this is no moment for equivocation and delay. I have deceived your +Grace. I was about to bring down shame upon your house, to cause your +indignant displeasure, my parents anguish, myself but endless remorseful +misery. To save all this, I would return home to implore the +forgiveness, the protection of my parents; they alone can guard me from +myself. Oh, if you ever loved my mother," she continued, starting up +with agony, as the hour of nine chimed on her ear, "send some one with +me, and let me go home. Half an hour more," and her voice grew almost +inarticulate with suppressed emotion, "and it may be too late. Mother, +mother, if I could but see you once again!" + +"Before, as the wife or the victim of the Right Honourable Lord +Alphingham, you fly from her for ever, and thus reward her cares, her +love, her prayers, wretched and deceiving girl," sternly and slowly the +Duchess said, as she rapidly yet with her usual majesty paced the room, +and laid her hand heavily on Caroline's shoulder, as she sat bowed down +with shame before her. "Deny it not; it was thus you would bring down +shame on my home; thus create agony for your devoted parents; thus prove +your gratitude, love, obedience, by wrenching every tie asunder. Oh, +shame, shame! If this be the fruit of such tender cares, such careful +training, oh, where shall we seek for honour and integrity--in what +heart find virtue? And why not consummate your sin? why pause ere your +noble and virtuous resolution was put in force? why hesitate in the +accomplishment of your designs? Why not fly with your honourable lover, +and thus wring the fond hearts of your parents at once to the utmost? +Why retract now, when it will be only to delude again? Miserable and +deluded girl, what new whim has caused this sudden change? Wherefore +wait till it be too late to repent--to persuade us that you are an +unwilling abettor and assistant in this man's schemes? Go, fly with him; +it were better to reconcile your indulgent mother to an eternal +separation, than that she should take you once more to her heart, and be +again deceived. Go, your secret is safe. How dare you speak of +inflicting misery on your parents? Must not hypocrisy lurk in every +word, when wilfully, recklessly, you have already abused their +confidence and insulted their love? much more you cannot do." She +paused, as if in expectation of a reply, but none came. Caroline's +breaking heart had lost that proud spirit which, a few days before, +would have called a haughty answer from her lips. She writhed beneath +those stern unpitying accents, which perhaps in such a moment of +remorseful agony might have been spared, but she replied not; and, after +a brief silence, the Duchess again spoke. + +"Caroline, answer me. What has caused this sudden change in your +intentions? What has chanced between you and Lord Alphingham to demand +this sudden longing for home? What impulse bids you thus elude him?" + +"The memory of my mother's love," and Caroline raised her head, and +pushing back her disordered hair, gazed upon the face of the Duchess +with an expression of suffering few could have looked upon unmoved. +"You are right, I have deceived my too indulgent parents, I have abused +their confidence, insulted their love; but I cannot, oh, I cannot still +those principles within me which they have implanted. In my hours of +maddening folly I remembered them not; I believed they had gone from me +for ever, and I should be happy. They have returned to torture me, to +tell me that as the wife of Lord Alphingham, without the blessing of my +parents, I shall be wretched. I have brought down endless misery on +myself--that matters not; but oh, I will not cause them further +suffering. I will no longer wring the heart of my gentle mother, who has +so often prayed for her erring child. Too late, perhaps, I have +determined, but the wife of Lord Alphingham I will never be; but his +character is still dear to me, and I entreat your Grace not to withdraw +your favour from him. He alone is not to blame, I also am culpable, for +I acknowledge the encouragement I have given him. My character for +integrity is gone, but his is still unstained." + +"Fear not for him, my favour he has never had; but my honour is too dear +to me for such an affair as this to pass my lips. Let him continue the +courted, the spoiled, the flattered child of fashion he has ever been. I +regard him not. Let him run his course rejoicing, it matters not to me." +She rang the bell as she spoke, and slowly and silently paced the room +till Allison obeyed the summons. "Desire James to put four swift horses +to the chariot. Important business calls me instantly to London; bid him +use dispatch, every moment is precious." + +Allison departed, and the Duchess continued pacing the apartment till +she returned, announcing the carriage as ready. A very few minutes +sufficed for their personal preparations, for the Duchess to give +peremptory orders to her trusty Allison to keep her departure a profound +secret, as she should return before her guests were stirring the next +morning, and herself account for Miss Hamilton's sudden return home. Few +words were sufficient for Allison, who was in all respects well fitted +for the situation she held near a person of the Duchess of Rothbury's +character; and the carriage rolled rapidly from Airslie. + +Not another word passed between the travelling companions. In feverish +agitation on the part of Caroline, in cold, unbending sternness on that +of the Duchess, their journey passed. To the imagination of the former, +the roll of the carriage-wheels was the sound of pursuing horses; in +every turn of the road her fevered fancy beheld the figure of Lord +Alphingham: at one time glaring on her in reproachful bitterness, at +another, in mockery, derision, satire; and when she closed her eyes, +those visions still tormented, nor did they depart till she felt her +mother's arm around her, her gentle voice pronounce her name. + +True to her determination, the Duchess left London as early as six the +following day, and, as usual, was the first within the breakfast-room, +and little could her friends imagine that since they had left her the +preceding evening she had made a journey to London and back. Caroline's +indisposition, which had been evident for several days, although she had +not complained till the day before, easily accounted for her return +home, although the exact time of her doing so was known to none save her +Grace herself; and even if surprise had been created, it would speedily +have passed away in the whirl of amusements which surrounded them. But +the courted, the admired, the fascinating Viscount no longer joined the +festive group. His friend Sir Walter Courtenay accounted for and excused +his absence, by stating that Lord Alphingham had received a disagreeable +letter from an agent of his in Scotland, which demanded his instant +presence; that he intended passing through London, thence proceed to the +North, where, in all probability, he should await the hunting season, +being engaged to join a large circle of noble friends. + +It would be useless to linger on the impotent fury of Lord Alphingham +when he discovered his well-conceived plans were utterly frustrated, and +that his intended victim had eluded him, under the stern guardianship of +the Duchess of Rothbury. In the first bitter moment of disappointment, +he refused to accuse Caroline of any share in it, but believed their +plans had been, by some unforeseen circumstance, discovered, and she had +been forced to return home. If such were the case, he vowed to withdraw +her from such galling slavery; he swore by some means to make her his +own. But when her letter reached him, when he had perused its contents, +and marked that not one word gave evidence of agitation of mind or +unsteadiness of purpose, the current of his feelings changed. He cursed +his own mad folly for thus seeking one, in whom from the first he might +have seen there was no spirit, no quality suited to be his partner in a +fashionable world; he vowed to think no more of a weak, capricious fool, +so he now termed the girl he had fancied that he loved. As may readily +be imagined, he felt his self love very deeply wounded by the complete +frustration of his intentions, and being incapable of appreciating the +better principles which had fortunately actuated the resolve of +Caroline, a spirit of revenge entered his heart. He crushed the letter +in his hand, and paced the room in fury, and would have torn it to +atoms, when the thought struck him, that by enclosing the letter to the +confidant and adviser of his plans regarding Caroline, he might save +himself the mortification of relating his defeat, and revenge himself +effectually by exposing her to ridicule and contempt. + +He wrote therefore a few concise lines, regretting, in a slightly +satirical style, that Miss Grahame should have been so deceived with +regard to the views and feelings of her friend Miss Hamilton, and +referring her to the enclosed letter for all further explanation. + +Annie received this packet at the time she was in daily expectation of +the triumph of her schemes, the gratification of her dislike for the +being whose gentle admonitions she so much resented, which had been +dictated by Mrs. Hamilton's wish to increase the happiness of her +parents and herself. Lord Alphingham had regularly informed her of all +his intentions, and though Caroline had for some time entirely ceased to +write, yet she suspected nothing like defeat. Already she secretly +indulged in triumph, already anticipated the moment when every malignant +wish would be fulfilled, and she should see the proud, cold, disdainful +Mrs. Hamilton bowed down beneath the conduct of her child, humbled to +the dust by the reflections which would be cast upon her when the +elopement of Caroline should be made public; at that very time the +letter of Lord Alphingham arrived, and told her of defeat, complete, +irremediable. Scorn, bitter scorn curled her lip, as she glanced over +Caroline's epistle, thus dishonourably transmitted for her perusal. +Severe disappointment was for the time her portion, and yet, amid all +these violent emotions, attendant on one of her disposition, there was +one of a very different nature mingling with them, one that, while she +resolved if she could not mortify Mrs. Hamilton as she had intended, she +would yet do so by insinuations against Caroline's character, whenever +she had an opportunity; would bid her rejoice, strangely rejoice, that +she was not the wife of Lord Alphingham, that he was still free. While +she looked forward to that letter announcing the union of the Viscount +and Caroline, as placing the final seal on her triumphant schemes, we +may well doubt if even that enjoyment, the exultations in the sufferings +of another, would have stilled the anguish of her own heart, and +permitted her to triumph as she intended to have done, when the man she +loved was the husband of another. It was even so, though rendered by +prejudice almost insensible to anything but her hatred of Mrs. Hamilton. + +Annie had not associated so intimately with Lord Alphingham without +feeling the effect of his many fascinations; and, therefore, though both +provoked and disappointed at this unlooked-for failure of her schemes, +she was better enabled to overcome them. Resolving to leave her designs +against the peace of Caroline and her mother henceforth to chance, all +her energies were now put in action for the attainment of one grand +object, to so work upon the disappointed Viscount as herself to take the +place in his favour which Caroline had occupied. Her reply to his +letter, which he had earnestly requested might enclose Caroline's, and +be forwarded to him in London, was guarded, but artfully tending to +inflame his indignation against Caroline; suppressing her own opinion on +the subject, and exciting admiration of herself, and perhaps gratitude +for her untiring sympathy in his welfare, which she ably contrived +should breathe despondingly throughout. As that important affair, she +added, was thus unhappily over, their correspondence she felt ought to +cease, and she begged Lord Alphingham would write to her no more. She +had braved remark when the happiness of two in whom she was so deeply +interested was at stake; but as in that she had been disappointed, pain +as it was for her to be the one to check a correspondence which could +not fail to give her pleasure, being with one so enlightened, and in +every way so superior as Lord Alphingham, she insisted that no more +letters should pass between them. She gained her point; the Viscount +wondered how he could ever be so blind as to prefer Caroline to her, and +her words added weight to his resolution, to annoy the former by devoted +attentions to Miss Grahame, and, if it suited his interests, make the +latter his wife. + +The interviews Lord Alphingham contrived to have with Miss Grahame, +before he retired to Scotland, which he did not do for a fortnight after +his rejection, strengthened the intentions of both. The Viscount found +new charms in the reserve and agitation which now marked Annie's +behaviour, in the faint voice and well-concealed intelligence, that +however she might sympathise in his vexation, for herself she could not +regret his freedom. All this, though they were scarcely ever alone, +formed a perfect understanding between them, and quickly banished the +image of Caroline from the vain and fickle-minded Alphingham. + +Wishing to keep up her pretended friendship for Caroline, that she +might the more effectually wound her, and not believing the sentiments +of the misguided girl were changed towards her also, Annie called at +Berkeley Square a very few days after Caroline's return, and she had +become acquainted with all that had passed. No one was visible in the +drawing-room; the young men, she knew, had both arrived from college, +but the house was destitute of that air of cheerfulness and glee which +generally attended their return. Some little time she waited with +impatient displeasure, which did not lessen when, on hearing the door +open, she beheld, not Caroline but Mrs. Hamilton herself, her cheek +pale, as if from some internal suffering, but with even more than her +wonted dignity both in mien and step, and for a moment Annie struggled +in vain to speak with the eagerness with which she intended to have +inquired for Caroline; before the mild yet penetrating glance of Mrs. +Hamilton even her self-possession appeared about to abandon her. She +felt lowered, humbled in her presence, and it was this, perhaps, this +very sense of inferiority, which had ever heightened dislike. + +Mildly, yet coldly and briefly, Mrs. Hamilton answered Miss Grahame's +torrent of questions and regrets which followed her information, that +Caroline was not well enough to see any one but her own family, and +that, as they left London some little time sooner than they had +originally intended, she had begged her mother to tender her farewell. +Annie expressed excessive sorrow, but no effort on either side was made +to prolong this interview, and it was very quickly over. Annie returned +home dissatisfied and angry, determining to make one attempt more; and +if that failed, she thought she could as successfully wound by inuendoes +and ridicule, should mere acquaintance take the place of intimate +friendship. + +Miss Grahame accordingly wrote in a truly heroic and highly-phrased +style, regretting, sympathising, and encouraging; but the answer, though +guardedly worded, told her too plainly all her influence was over. + +"I am not strong enough," wrote Caroline, "yet to argue with you, or +defend my conduct, as I feel sure I should be compelled to do, did we +meet now. I find, too late, that on many points we differ so completely, +that the confidential intercourse, which has hitherto been ours, must +henceforth be at an end. Forgive me, dear Annie, if it grieves you to +read these words; believe me, it is painful to me to write them. But now +that my feelings on so many important subjects have been changed--now +that the blinding film has been mercifully removed from my eyes, and I +see the whole extent of my sinful folly, I cannot hope to find the same +friend in you. Too late, for my peace, I have discovered that our +principles of duty are directly opposite. I blame you not for what I am, +for the suffering I am still enduring, no, for that I alone have caused; +but your persuasions, your representations heightened the evil, +strengthened me in my sinful course. You saw my folly, and worked on it, +by sowing the seeds of mistrust and dislike towards my parents. I was a +passive tool in your hands, and you endeavoured to mould me according to +your notions of happiness. I thank you for all the interest you have +thus endeavoured to prove for me. You cannot regret withdrawing it, now +I have in your eyes proved myself so undeserving. This is the last +confidential letter I shall ever write, save to her who is indeed my +best, my truest, most indulgent friend on earth; but before I entirely +conclude, the love, the friendship I have felt for you compels me to +implore you to pause in your career. Oh, Annie, do not follow up those +principles you would have instilled in me; do not, oh, as you value +future innocence and peace, do not let them be your guide in life; you +will find them hollow, vain, and false. Pause but for one moment, and +reflect. Can there he happiness without virtue, peace without integrity? +Is there pleasure without truth? Was deception productive of felicity to +me? Oh, no, no. That visit to London, that introduction in the gay world +to which I looked forward with so much joy, the retrospection of which I +hoped would have enlivened Oakwood, oh, what does it present? A dreary +waste of life, varied only by remorse. Had my career been yours, you +would perhaps have looked on it differently; but I cannot. Oh, Annie, +once more, I beseech, let not such principles actuate your future +conduct; they are wrong, they will load to misery here, and what +preparation are they for eternity? + +"Farewell, and may God bless you! We shall not, perhaps, meet again till +next season, and then it cannot be as we have parted. An interest in +your welfare I shall ever feel, but intimacy must be at an end between +us. + +"CAROLINE." + + + + +CHAPTER VIII. + + +There was a dark lowering frown obscuring the noble and usually open +brow of the young heir of Oakwood, and undisguised anger visible in +every feature and every movement, as he paced the library with +disordered steps, about ten days after the events we have recorded, and +three since his return from college. He had crossed his arms on his +chest, which was swelling with the emotion he was with difficulty +repressing, and his tall, elegant figure appeared to increase in height +beneath his indignant and, in this case, just displeasure. + +Caroline's depression had not decreased since her brother's arrival. She +felt she had been unjust to Percy, and a degree of coldness which had +appeared at first in his conduct towards her, occasioned, though she +knew it not, by her rejection of his friend St. Eval, which he believed +was occasioned by her love of Alphingham, whom he fancied she still +continued to regard with an eye of favour; both these causes created +reserve and distance between the brother and sister, in lieu of that +cordiality which had hitherto subsisted between them. + +Percy had not been aware of all that had passed between the Viscount and +Caroline till that morning, when Emmeline, hoping to soften his manner +towards her sister, related, with all her natural eloquence, the +Viscount's conduct, and the triumph of duty which Caroline had achieved. +That he had even asked her of his father, Percy knew not till then, and +it was this intelligence bursting on him at once which called forth such +violent anger. Emmeline had been summoned away before she had time to +note the startling effects of her words; but Herbert did, and though he +was unacquainted with the secret cause of his brother's dislike towards +Lord Alphingham, he endeavoured by gentle eloquence to pacify and turn +him from his purpose, at which he trembled. + +"The villain, the cold-blooded, despicable villain!" muttered Percy at +intervals, as he continued his hurried pace, without heeding, perhaps +not hearing, Herbert's persuasive accents. "To act thus foully--to play +thus on the unguarded feelings of a weak, at least, unsophisticated, +unsuspecting girl--to gain her love, to destine her to ruin and shame, +the heartless miscreant! Oh, that my promise prevented not my exposing +him to the whole world; but there is another way--the villain shall find +such conduct passes not unheeded!" + +"You are right, Percy," interposed Herbert, gently determining not to +understand him. "If his conduct be indeed such as to call forth, with +justice, this irritation on your part, his punishment will come at +last." + +"It shall come, ay, and by this baud!" exclaimed Percy, striking his +clenched hand violently on the table; "if his conduct be such. You speak +coolly, Herbert, but you know not all, therefore I forgive you: it is +the conduct of a villain, ay, and he shall know it too. Before three +suns have set again, he shall feel my sister has an avenger!" + +"His schemes against the peace, the honour of the innocent are +registered on high; be calm, be satisfied, Percy. His last hour will be +chastisement enough." + +"By heaven, it shall be!" retorted Percy, passion increasing, it +appeared, at every gentle word his brother spoke, and irritating him +beyond control. "Herbert, you will drive me mad with this mistimed +calmness; you know not half the injury she has received." + +"Whatever might have been his schemes, they have all failed, Percy, and +therefore should we not rather feel thankful for Caroline's restoration +to her home, to herself, than thus encourage fury against him from whose +snares she has escaped?" + +"Yes; and though his base plan, thanks to my sister's strength of mind, +or, rather, my mother's enduring counsel, has not succeeded, am I to sit +calmly by and see her health, spirits, alike sinking beneath that love +which the deceiving villain knew so well how to call forth? am I to see +this, to gaze on the suffering he has caused, unmoved, and permit him to +pass unscathed, as if his victim had neither father nor brother to +protect and avenge her injured honour?" + +"Her honour is not injured. She is as innocent and as pure as before +Lord Alphingham addressed her. Percy, you are increasing this just +displeasure by imaginary causes. I do not believe it to be love for him +that occasions her present suffering; I think, from the conversations we +have had, it is much more like remorse for the past, and bitter grief +that the confidence of our parents must, spite of their excessive +kindness, be for a time entirely withdrawn, not any lingering affection +for Alphingham." + +"Whatever it be, he is the primary cause. Not injured! every word of +love from his lips is pollution; his asking her of my father an +atrocious insult; his endeavours to fly with her a deadly sin--an +undying stain." + +Herbert shuddered involuntarily. + +"What would you say, or mean?" he exclaimed. + +"What have you heard or known concerning him, that calls for words like +these?" + +"Ask me not, as you love me; it is enough I know he is a villain," and +Percy continued his rapid walk. Herbert rose from his seat and +approached him. + +"Percy," he said, "my dear brother, tell me what is it you would do? to +what would this unwonted passion lead? Oh, let it not gain too great a +dominion, Percy. Dear Percy, what would you do?" + +"I would seek him, Herbert," replied Percy, "where ever he is; by whom +surrounded. I would taunt him as a deceiving, heartless villain, and if +he demand satisfaction, by heaven, it would be joy for me to give it!" + +"Has passion, then, indeed obtained so much ascendancy, it would be joy +for you to meet him thus for blood?" demanded Herbert, fixing his large, +melancholy eyes intently on Percy's face, on which the cloud was +becoming darker, and his step even more rapid. "Would you seek him for +the purpose of exciting anger like your own? is it thus you would avenge +my sister?" + +"Thus, and only thus," answered Percy, with ungoverned fury. "As others +have done; man to man I would meet him, and villain as he is, I would +have honourable vengeance for the insult, not only to my sister, but to +us all. Why should I stay my hand?" + +"Why? because on you more than on many others has the light of our +blessed religion dawned," answered Herbert, calmly; "because you know +what others think not of, that the law of our Master forbiddeth blood; +that whosoever sheds it, on whatever plea, his shall be demanded in +return; because you know, in seeking vengeance by blood, His law is +disobeyed, and His vengeance you would call upon yourself. Percy, you +will not, you dare not act as this overwhelming passion dictates." + +"Dare not," repeated the young man, light flashing from his eye as if +his spirit chafed at that word, even from his brother, "dare not; you +mistake me, Herbert. I will not sit tamely down beneath an injury such +as this. I will not see that villain triumph without one effort to prove +to him that he is known, and make the whole world know him as he is." + +"And would a hostile meeting accomplish this? Would that proclaim his +villainy, of whatever nature it may be, to the world? Would they not +rather side with him, their present minion, and even bring forward your +unjustifiable conduct as a fresh proof in his favour? How would they +give credit to the terms they may hear you apply to him, when even in +your family you speak not of the true cause of this strange agitation +and indignant anger." + +Percy continued to pace the room for some minutes without answering. + +"My honour has been insulted in the person of my sister," he muttered, +at length, as if speaking more to himself than to his brother; "and am I +to bear that calmly? Were the truth made known, would not the whole +world look on me with scorn as a spiritless coward, to whom the law of +honour was as nothing; who would see his sister suffering from the arts +of a miscreant, without one effort to revenge her?" + +"The law of honour," replied Herbert, bitterly; "it is the law of blood, +of murder, of wilful, uncalled-for murder. Percy, my brother, banish +these guilty thoughts. Do not be one of those misguided beings who, +from that false deceiving plea, the law of honour, condemn whole +families to misery, and themselves, without preparation, without prayer, +nay, in the very act of disobeying a sacred commandment of their God, +rush heedless into His presence, into awful eternity." + +He paused, but not vainly had he spoken. Percy gazed on his brother's +features with greater calmness, and more kindly, but still impetuously, +said-- + +"Would you then have me stand calmly by and behold my sister a suffering +victim to his arts, though actual sin, thank God, has been spared, and +thus permit that villain Alphingham to continue his course triumphant?" + +"Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord, and I will repay it," answered +Herbert, instantly, twining his arm within that of his brother, and +looking up in his face with that beseeching glance of affection which +was so peculiar to his features. "Dear brother, rest on those words and +be contented. It is not for us to think of vengeance or to seek for +retribution; justice is, indeed, ours to claim, but in this case, there +is no point on which we can demand it. Let Alphingham, even granting you +know him as he is, pursue his course in peace. Did you endeavour to +inflict chastisement, is it not doubting the wisdom and justice of the +Almighty? And suppose you fell instead of your adversary, in the meeting +you would seek--what, think you, would be the emotions of all those who +so dearly love you, when they gazed on your bleeding corse, and +remembered you had sought death in defiance of every principle they had +so carefully instilled? Think of my mother's silent agony; has not +Caroline's conduct occasioned sufficient pain, and would you increase +it? you, whose most trifling action is dictated by love for her; you, in +whom she has every reason to look for so much virtue, honour, and +self-control; whom she so dearly, so devotedly loves? Remember what she +would feel; and, if no other consideration have effect, surely that will +bid you pause." + +Percy still paced the room, but his head was averted from his brother as +he spoke, and his step bespoke contending and painful emotions. He did +not answer when Herbert ceased to speak, but his brother knew him well, +and remained silent. + +"You have conquered, Herbert," he exclaimed at length, firmly clasping +his brother's hand in his and raising his head; anger still lingered on +his cheek, but his eye was softer. "I could not bear my mother's +wretchedness; I could not thus repay her love, her cherished care. I +will not seek this base and heartless man. I tremble for my present +resolution, if he chance to cross my path; but, for her sake, I will +avoid him; for her sake, his villainy shall be still concealed." + +"Endeavour to think of him more charitably, my dear Percy, or forget him +entirely, which you will." + +"Think of him charitably; him--a fashionable, fawning, seducing +hypocrite!" burst from Percy, in a tone of renewed passion. "No! the +gall he has created within me cannot yet be turned to sweetness; forget +him--that at least is impossible, when Caroline's coldness and reserve +remind me disagreeably of him every day. It is plain she looks on me as +the destroyer of her happiness; thinks, perhaps, had it not been for my +letter my father would have given his consent, and she might have +peacefully become the wife of Alphingham. It is hard to bear unkindness +from one whom I have endeavoured to preserve from ruin." + +"Nay, do not be unjust, Percy; are you not cool and reserved yourself? +How do we know why Caroline is somewhat more so than usual? Poor girl, +we may find excuses for her, but I know no reason why you should treat +her as you do." + +"Her whole conduct demands it. How did she use that noble fellow St. +Eval; encourage him, so that their union was confidently asserted, and +then reject him for no cause whatever; or, if she had a cause, for love +of a villain, who, it appears, in secret, possessed all the favour she +pretended to lavish on St. Eval,--both false and deceiving." + +"Percy, you are determined to be angry with everybody to-day. I +flattered myself my influence had allayed your passion, and behold, it +is only withdrawn from one object to be hurled upon another. Can you not +find some good cause now to turn it from Caroline on me? Is it nothing +that I should dare face the tempest of your wrath, and tell my impetuous +and headstrong brother exactly what I thought--nothing, that I should +have ventured to say there was a thing on earth you dared not do?" + +Percy turned sharply towards him, as if in that moment he could be angry +even with him; but Herbert met his fierce glance with a smile so full of +affectionate interest, that all Percy's displeasure and irritation +seemed at once removed. + +"Displeased with you!" exclaimed Percy, when involuntary admiration had +taken the place of anger, and unconsciously the noble serenity of +Herbert's temper appeared to soothe the more irritable nature of his +own. "Ay, Herbert, when we two have exchanged characters, such may be, +till then I am contented to love and reverence the virtue, the +gentleness I cannot make my own." + +"We are better thus, my brother," replied Herbert, feelingly; "were we +the same, could I have been the happy being you have made me at college? +Much, very much happiness do I owe to your high spirit, Percy. Without +your support, my life, spite of the charms of study, would have been a +painful void at college; and though I feel, you know not perhaps how +often and how bitterly, that in many things I cannot hope to be your +companion, yet to think my affection may sometimes check the violence +that would lead you wrong, oh, that is all I can hope for or desire." + +"Have you not my love, my confidence, my fondest, warmest esteem?" +exclaimed Percy, impetuously, and twining his arm, as in fondness he +often did, around his brother's neck. "Is there one among my gay +companions I love as you, though I appear to seek their society more?" + +Herbert was silent. + +"You do not doubt me, Herbert?" + +"Percy--no!" exclaimed the youth, with unwonted ardour. To speak more at +that moment he could not, and ere words came at his command, the library +door slowly opened, and Caroline languidly entered. + +Herbert somewhat hurriedly left the room, to conceal the agitation the +interview with Percy had occasioned him. + +For some little time Caroline remained in the library, seeking, it +appeared, a book, without a word passing between her and Percy. Both +evidently wished to speak, but neither liked to begin; at length +Caroline approached him. + +"Percy," she began, and her voice trembled sufficiently to prevent more. +Percy was softened. + +"Well, dear Caroline, am I so very terrible you cannot speak to me? I +have been angry and unjust, and you, perhaps, a little too reserved; so +now let us forgive and forget, as we did when we were children, and be +friends for the future." + +He spoke with all his natural frankness, and extended his hand towards +her. Caroline's spirits were so depressed, that the least word or token +of kindness overcame her, and pressing her brother's hand in both hers, +she turned away her head to conceal the quickly-starting tears, and +Percy continued, trying to smile-- + +"Well, Caroline, will you not tell me what you were going to say? I +cannot quite penetrate your thoughts." + +Again Caroline hesitated, but then with an effort she said, fixing her +heavy eyes on her brother's face-- + +"Percy, had you a real cause for writing to my father as you did some +few weeks ago, or was it rumour alone which actuated your doing so? I +implore you to answer me truly." + +"I had all-sufficient cause," he answered, instantly. "It was from no +rumour. Do you think that, without good reason, I would have endeavoured +to traduce the character of any man?" + +"And what was that cause? Why did you implore my father, as he valued my +future peace, not to expose me to his fascinations?" + +Caroline spoke slowly and deliberately, as if every word were weighed +ere it was uttered, but with an expression on her features, as if life +and peace depended on his answer. + +Percy looked earnestly at her. + +"Why should you ask this question, my dear sister?" he said. "If I +answer it, what good will it do? Why should I solve a mystery, that, if +you love this Alphingham, as this extreme depression bids me believe, +must bring but increase of pain?" + +"Percy," replied Caroline, raising her head, and standing with returning +dignity before him, "Percy, do not let the idea of my love bid you +hesitate. Increase of pain I do not think is possible; but yet, do not +mistake me, that pain does not spring from disappointed affection. +Percy, I do not love Lord Alphingham; I have been fascinated, and the +remembrance of the past still clings to me with remorse and suffering; +but I never loved him as, had I not been infatuated and blind, had I not +rejected the counsels and confidence of my mother, I might have loved +another. You know not how I have been led on, how I have permitted +myself to be but a tool in the hands of those whose independence I +admired, and aided them by my own reckless folly--the wish to prove, +however differently I was educated, still I could act with equal spirit. +Had it not been for that self-will, that perverse spirit, I might now +have been a happy and a virtuous wife, loving and esteeming that +superior being, whose affections I wilfully cast away; but that matters +not now," she added, hurriedly. "My mother was right, I was unworthy to +share his lot; but of this rest assured, I do not love, I never have +loved, for I cannot esteem Lord Alphingham." + +"But why then wish to know more concerning him?" Percy said, much +relieved by his sister's words, and more pleased than he chose to +appear by her allusion to St. Eval. "Is it not enough your connection +with him is entirely broken off?" + +"No, Percy; I have rejected him, dissolved our engagement, I scarcely +know wherefore, except that I felt I could not be his without my +father's consent; but there are times I feel as if I had treated him +unjustly, that I have had no cause to think ill of him; my conduct had +encouraged him. To me he has been devoted and respectful, and though I +could not, would not be his wife, yet these thoughts linger on my mind, +and add most painfully to the chaos already there." + +Twice Percy slowly traversed the room, with a countenance on which +anxious thought was deeply imprinted. He paused opposite to Caroline, +took both her hands in his, and spoke in a voice which, though low, was +so solemn that it thrilled to her inmost soul. + +"Caroline, I had hoped the fatal secret made known to me would never +have passed my lips, but for the restoration of your peace it shall be +divulged, nor will the injured one who first intrusted it to me, to +preserve you from ruin, believe I have betrayed her trust. You have not +suspected the whole extent of evil that would have been yours, had you +indeed fled with that hypocritical villain. Caroline, Lord Alphingham is +a married man--his wife still lives!" + +Had a thunderbolt fallen at her feet, or the earth yawned beneath her, +not more pale or transfixed would Caroline have stood than she did as +those unexpected words fell clear and shrill as a trumpet-blast upon her +tortured ear. Amid all her conjectures as to the meaning of Percy's +words, this idea had never crossed her mind; that Alphingham could thus +have deliberately been seeking her ruin, under the guise of love and +honour, was a stretch of villainy that entered not into her conception. +Now that the truth was known, she stood as if suddenly turned to marble, +her cheek, her very lips bearing the colour of death. Then came the +thoughts of the past; had it not been for those recollections of her +childhood, her mother's love, devotion, what would she now have been? In +vain she struggled to bear up against that rushing torrent of thought; +every limb was seized with violent trembling, her brain reeled, and she +would have sunk to the ground, had not Percy, alarmed at the effect of +his words, led her tenderly to a seat, and kneeling by her side, threw +his arms around her. Her head sunk on his shoulder, and she clung to him +as if evil and guilt and wretchedness still hovered like fiends around +her, and he would protect her from them all. Fire again flashed from the +eyes of the young man as he thought on Alphingham, but for her sake he +restrained himself, and endeavoured by a few soothing words to calm her. + +"Tell me all--all you know, I can bear it," she said at length, almost +inaudibly, and looking up with features as deathlike as before. Percy +complied with her request, and briefly related as follows: + +He had become acquainted during his college life, he told her, with a +widow and her daughter, who lived about four or five miles from Oxford. +Some service he had rendered them, of sufficient importance as to make +him an ever welcome and acceptable guest within the precincts of that +cottage, which proclaimed a refined and elevated taste, although its +inmates were not of the highest class. Both Percy fancied were widows, +although he scarcely knew the foundation of that fancy, except the +circumstance of their living together, and the husband of the younger +lady never appearing; nor was his name ever mentioned in the +confidential conversations he sometimes had with them, which the service +he had had in his power to do demanded. Mrs. Amesfort, the daughter, +still possessed great beauty, which a shade of pensive thought, +sometimes amounting to deep melancholy, rendered even more lovely. Her +age might have been six or seven and twenty, she could not have been +more. At an earlier age, there was still evidence that she had been a +sparkling, lively girl, and her mother would frequently relate to the +young man the change that sorrow--and sorrow, she hinted, of a +peculiarly painful nature--had made in one who, ten years previous, had +been so full of life and glee. Decline, slow but sure, it seemed even to +Percy's inexperienced eye, was marked on her pale features; and at those +times when bodily suffering was greatest, her spirit would resume a +portion of its former lightness, as if it rejoiced in the anticipated +release. There was a deep thrilling melody in her voice, whether in +speaking or, when strength allowed, in warbling forth the pathetic airs +of her native land; for Agnes Amesfort was a child of Erin, once +enthusiastic, warm, devoted, as were her countrywomen--possessing +feelings that even beneath that pale, calm exterior would sometimes +burst forth and tinge her cheek, and light up her soul-speaking eye with +momentary but brilliant radiance, and whispered too clearly what she had +once been, and what was now the wreck. + +The gaiety, the frankness, and unassuming manner of Percy rendered him a +most acceptable visitant at Isis Lodge, so the cottage was called; he +was ever ready with some joyous tale, either of Oxford or of the +metropolis, to bring a smile even to the lips of Mrs. Amesfort. It was +not likely that he should so frequently visit the cottage without +exciting the curiosity and risibility of his college companions; but he +was enabled cheerfully and with temper to withstand it all, feeling +secure in his own integrity, and confident that the situation in which +he stood relative to the inmates of that cottage was mutually +understood. Several inquiries Percy made concerning these interesting +females; but no intelligence of their former lives could he obtain; they +had only settled in the cottage a few months previous to the period of +his first acquaintance with them; and whence they came, and who they +were, no one knew nor cared to know. It was enough for the poor for many +miles round, that the assistance of the strangers was extended towards +them, with kind words and consolation in their troubles; and for the +Oxonians, that though they received with extreme and even grateful +politeness the visits made them, they were never returned. + +One little member of this small family Percy had not mentioned, a little +girl, who might have been about eight or nine years old, an interesting +child, whom Percy had saved from a watery grave in the rapid Isis, which +rolled at the base of the grounds; a child, in whom the affections of +her widowed mother were centred with a force and intensity, that it +appeared death itself could but divide; and she was, indeed, one to +love--affectionate, and full of glee; yet the least sign of increased +suffering on the part of her mother would check the wild exuberance of +childish spirits, without diminishing in the least her cheerfulness, and +she would throw her arms around her neck, and fondly ask, if she might +by kisses while away the pain. Many a game of play did she have with her +preserver, whose extreme kindness and excessive liveliness excited the +affections of the child, and increased and preserved the gratitude his +courageous conduct had occasioned in the bosom of that young devoted +mother, whose every earthly joy was centred in her fatherless child. + +It happened that in speaking one day of London society, and of the +reigning belles and beaux of the season, that Percy casually mentioned +the name of Lord Alphingham, whom he declared was by all accounts so +overwhelmed with attentions and flatteries, since his return from a nine +years' residence on the Continent, that there was every chance of his +being thoroughly spoiled, if he were not so already, and losing every +grain of sense, if he had any to lose. He was surprised, as he spoke, at +the very visible agitation of the elder lady, whose colour went and came +so rapidly, that involuntarily he turned towards her daughter, wondering +if any such emotion were visible in her; and though she did not appear +paler than usual, nor was any outward emotion visible, save that her arm +was somewhat tightly bound round the tiny figure of the little Agnes, he +almost started, as he met those large soft eyes fixed full upon him, as +if they would penetrate his soul; and though her voice was calm, +unhesitating, and firm, as she asked him if he were acquainted with Lord +Alphingham, yet its tones sounded even more thrilling, more sadly than +usual. He answered truly in the negative, adding, he was not ambitious +of his acquaintance; as a man, he was not one to suit his fancy. Many +questions did Mrs. Amesfort ask relative to this nobleman, and still +unconsciously her arm held her child more closely to her side. The elder +lady's looks were bent on them both, expressive, it seemed to Percy, of +fondness for those two beloved objects, and struggling with indignation +towards another. Percy returned to college that evening unusually +thoughtful. What could Lord Alphingham have to do with the inhabitants +of that simple cottage? Incoherent fancies occupied his mind, but from +all which presented themselves as solutions to the mystery his pure mind +revolted; and, compelled by an impulse he could not resist, he continued +to speak of Alphingham every time he visited the cottage. Mrs. Amesfort, +it appeared to him, rather encouraging than checking his conversation on +that subject, by introducing it herself, and demanding if his name were +still mentioned in Percy's letters from town. Mrs. Morley, her mother, +ever looked anxiously at her, as if she could have wished the subject +unnamed; but still Alphingham continued to be the theme so constantly +discussed at Isis Lodge, that Percy felt no repugnance in mentioning +those reports which allied his sister's name with that of the Viscount. +Again were the eyes of Mrs. Amesfort fixed intently on his face, and she +spoke but little more during that evening's visit. Percy left her, +unable to account for the deep and serious thought imprinted on her +features, nor the look with which she bade him seek her the following +day at an appointed hour, as she earnestly wished to speak with him +alone. The day passed heavily till he was again with her. She was alone; +and steady determination more than ever marked on her clear and polished +brow. She spoke, and Percy listened, absorbed; she alluded to his +preservation of her child, and, in that moment of reawakened gratitude, +all the enthusiasm of her country spoke in her eyes and voice; and then +a moment she paused, and a bright and apparently painful flush mounted +to those cheeks which Percy had ever seen so pale. She implored his +forbearance with her; his pardon, at what might appear an unwarrantable +interference on her part in the affairs of his family; but his many and +eloquent descriptions of them, particularly of his mother, had caused an +interest that compelled her to reveal a fatal secret which, she had +hoped, would never have passed her lips. Was it a mere rumour, or were +Lord Alphingham's attentions marked and decided towards his sister? +Percy believed there was very good foundation for the rumours he had +heard. + +Did his parents approve of it? she again asked, and the flush of +excitement faded. Percy was not quite sure; he rather thought by his +mother's letters she did not, though Caroline was universally envied as +an object of such profound attention from one so courted and admired. +Did his sister love him?--the words appeared wrung with a violent effort +from Mrs. Amesfort's lips. + +He did not fancy she did as yet; but he doubted not the power of Lord +Alphingham's many fascinations and exclusive devotion to herself, on one +naturally rather susceptible to vanity as was Caroline. + +"Oh, if you love your sister, save her ere it be too late, ere her +affections are engaged," was Mrs. Amesfort's reply, with a burst of +emotion, the more terrible, from its contrast with her general calm and +unmoved demeanour. "Expose her not to those fascinations which I know no +heart can resist. Let her not associate with him--with my husband; he +is not free to love--I am his lawful wife; and the child you saved is +his--his own--the offspring of lawfully-hallowed wedlock; though he has +cast me off, though his eyes have never gazed upon my child, yet, yet we +are his. No cruel words of separation has the law of England spoken. But +do not, oh! if you have any regard for me," she continued, wildly +seizing both Percy's hands, as she marked the dark blood of passion +kindling on the young man's brow, "do not betray him; do not let him +know that his wife--his injured wife--has risen to cry shame upon him, +and banish him from those circles wherein he is formed to mingle. +Promise me faithfully, solemnly, you will not betray my secret more than +is necessary to preserve your sister from misery and ruin. I thought +even for her I could not have spoken thus, but I gazed on my child, and +remembered she too has a mother, whose happiness is centred in her as +mine is in my Agnes, and I could hesitate no more. Promise me you will +not abuse my confidence, Mr. Hamilton, promise me; let me not have the +misery of reproaches from him to whom my fond heart still clings, as it +did at first. Yes; though for nine long weary years I have never seen +his face nor heard his voice, still he knows not, guesses not how his +image dwells within, how faithfully, how fervidly he is still beloved. +Promise me my existence shall not be suspected, that neither he nor any +one shall know the secret of my existence. It is enough for me he lives, +is happy. My child! could I but see her in the station her rank +demands,--but, oh, I would not force her on her father." + +She would still have spoken, still have entreated, but this unwonted +emotion had exhausted her feeble strength. Greatly moved by this +extraordinary disclosure, and struck with that deep devotedness, that +undying love, Percy solemnly pledged his word to preserve her secret. + +"My course will soon be over, my sand run out," she said, after +energetically thanking him for his soothing and relieving words, and in +a tone of such sad, resigned hopelessness, that, irritated as he felt +towards Alphingham, his eye glistened and his lips quivered. "And +wherefore should I dash down his present enjoyment by standing forward +and proclaiming myself his wife? Why should I expose my secret sorrows, +my breaking heart to the inspection of a cold and heartless world, and +draw down on my dying moments his wrath, for the poor satisfaction of +beholding myself recognised as Viscountess Alphingham? Would worldly +honours supply the place of his affection? Oh, no, no! I am better as I +am. The tears of maternal and filial love will hallow my grave; and he, +too, when he knows for his sake, to save him a pang, I have suffered my +heart to break in uncomplaining silence, oh, he too may shed one tear, +bestow a thought on one who loved him to the last!" + +"But your child!" exclaimed Percy, almost involuntarily. + +"Will be happier here, under my mother's care, unconscious of her birth, +than mingling in a dangerous world, without a mother to cherish and +protect her. Her father might neglect, despise her; she might be a bar +to a second and a happier union, and oh, I could not die in peace did I +expose her thus." + +Percy was silent, and when the interview had closed, he bade that +devoted woman farewell, with a saddened and deeply thoughtful brow. + +Lord Alphingham had been a student in Dublin, in the environs of which +city dwelt Mrs. Morley, a widow, and this her only child. At their +cottage he became a constant and devoted guest, and as might have been +expected, his impetuous and headstrong nature became desperately +enamoured of the beautiful and innocent Agnes, then only seventeen. +Spite of his youth, being barely twenty, neither mother nor daughter +could withstand his eloquent solicitations, and a private but sacred +marriage was performed. He quitted college, but still lingered in +Ireland, till a peremptory letter from his father summoned him to +England, to celebrate his coming of age. He left his bride, and the +anguish of parting was certainly at that time mutual. Some few months +Agnes hoped for and looked to his return. Alphingham, then Lord +Amesfort, on his part, was restrained only by the fear of the inveteracy +of his father's disposition from confessing his marriage, and sending +for his wife. Another bride, of rank and wealth, was proposed to him, +and then he confessed the truth. The fury of the old man knew no bounds, +and he swore to disinherit his son, if he did not promise never to +return to his ignoble wife, whom he vowed he never would acknowledge. +Amesfort promised submission, fully intending to remain constant till +his father's death, which failing health proclaimed was not far distant, +and then seek his gentle wife, and introduce her in her proper sphere. +He wrote to this effect, and the boding heart of Agnes sunk at once; in +vain her mother strove to rouse her energies, by alluding to the strain +of his letter, the passionate affection breathing in every line, the +sacred nature of his promise. She felt her doom, and ere her child was +six months old, her feelings, ominous of evil, were fully verified. + +Lord Alphingham lingered some time, and his son found in the society in +which the Viscount took good care he should continually mingle, +attractions weighty enough to banish from his fickle heart all love, and +nearly all recollection of his wife. He found matrimony would be very +inconvenient in the gay circle of which he was a member. All the better +feelings and qualities of his youth fled; beneath the influence of +example and bad companionship his evil ones were called forth and +fostered, and speedily he became the heartless libertine we have seen +him. His letters to the unfortunate Agnes were less and less frequent, +and at length ceased altogether, and the sum transmitted for her use +every year was soon the only proof that he still lived. His residence in +foreign lands, the various names he assumed, baffled all her efforts at +receiving the most distant intelligence concerning him, and Agnes still +lingered in hopeless resignation--"The heart will break, but brokenly +live on;" and thus it was she lived, existing for her child alone. Nine +years they had been parted, and Agnes had ever shrunk in evident pain +from quitting her native land, and the cottage which had been the scene +of her brief months of happiness; but when change of air was pleaded in +behalf of her child, then suffering from lingering fever, when change of +climate was strongly recommended by the physicians, in secret for +herself equally with that of her little girl, she hesitated no longer, +and a throb of mingled pain and pleasure swelled her too fond heart as +her foot pressed the native land of her husband. Some friends of her +mother, unacquainted with her sad story, resided near Oxford, and +thither they bent their steps, and finally fixed their residence, where +Mrs. Amesfort soon had the happiness of beholding her child restored to +perfect health and radiant in beauty; perhaps the faint hope that +Alphingham might one day unconsciously behold his daughter, reconciled +her to this residence in England. She was in his own land; she might +hear of him, of his happiness; and, deeply injured as she was, that +knowledge, to her too warm, too devoted heart was all-sufficient. + +Such were the particulars of the story which Percy concisely yet fully +related in confidence to his sister. Caroline neither moved nor spoke +during his recital; her features still retained their deadly paleness, +and her brother almost involuntarily felt alarmed. A few words she said, +as he ceased, in commentary on his tale, and her voice was calm. Nor did +her step falter as she quitted the library, and returned to her own +room, when, carefully closing the door, she sunk on the nearest seat, +and covering her eyes with her hands, as if to shut out all outward +objects, gave unchecked dominion to the incongruous thoughts occasioned +by Percy's tale. She could not define or banish them; a sudden +oppression appeared cast upon her brain, deadening its powers, and +preventing all relief from tears. The ruin, the wretchedness from which +she had been mercifully preserved stood foremost in her mind, all else +appeared a strange and frightful dream. The wife and child of Alphingham +flitted like mocking phantoms before her eyes, and the countenance of +Alphingham himself glared at her, and his gibing laugh seemed to scream +in her ears, and transform him into a malignant fiend revelling in the +misery he had created. She strove to pray but vainly; no words of such +soothing and consoling import rose to her lips. How long she remained in +this state of wretchedness she knew not, but it was the mild accents of +her mother's voice that roused her from her trance. + +"Are you not well, Caroline? What is the matter, love?" Mrs. Hamilton +asked, alarmed at the icy coldness of her daughter's hand, and kissing, +as she spoke, her pallid cheek. + +Caroline threw her arms round her, and a violent flood of tears relieved +the misery from which she was suffering so painfully. + +"Do not ask me to reveal the cause of this weakness, my dearest mother," +she said, when voice returned. "I shall be better now, and never, never +again shall recollections of the past, by afflicting me, cause you +solicitude. Do not fancy this apparent grief has anything to do with +regret at my late decision, or for still lingering affection; oh, no, +no. Do not look at me so anxiously, mother; I have had a long, long +conversation with Percy, and that has caused the weakness you perceive; +but it will soon pass away, and I shall be your own happy Caroline +again." + +Tears were still stealing from those bloodshot eyes; but she looked up +in Mrs. Hamilton's face with an expression of such confiding affection, +that her mother's anxious fears were calmed. She would not inquire more, +nor question Percy, when he sought her in her boudoir before dinner, to +request that no notice might be taken, if his sister's manner were that +evening less calm than usual. Mrs. Hamilton felt thankful that an +understanding had taken place between her children, whose estrangement +had been a source of severe pain, and she waited trustingly and calmly +for time to do its work on the torn heart and agitated nerves of +Caroline. To Emmeline's extreme delight, preparations for their +departure from London and return to Oakwood were now proceeding in good +earnest. Never did that fair and innocent face look more joyous and +animated, and never had her laugh been more glad and ringing than when +the carriage rolled away from Berkeley Square. Every circumstance of +their journey increased her childlike glee, every town they passed +through an object of interest, and even the pensive features of her +cousin Ellen reflected her unchecked joyousness. They seldom travelled +more than forty miles a day, and consequently it was not till the +evening of the fourth they neared the village, whose inhabitants, clad +in holiday attire, stood at the doors of their houses to receive them, +with silent and respectful yet very evident tokens of joy. The evening +was most lovely; the sun had lost the splendour of its beams, though +clouds of every brilliant hue proclaimed the increased glory which +attended its hour of rest, at times lost behind a richly glowing cloud, +and then bursting forth again and dyeing all nature with a flood of +gold. The river lay calmly sleeping before them, while on its glassy +bosom the heavens cast their radiance, relieved by the shade of the +mighty trees that stood to guard its banks; the rich foliage of the +trees, the superb green of the fields, in some of which the ripening +corn was beginning to stud with gold, the varied flowers gemming the +fertile hedge, the holy calmness of this summer eve, all called forth +the best feelings of the human heart. For a few minutes even Emmeline +was silent, and then her clear silvery voice was heard chanting, as if +by an irresistible impulse, the beautiful hymn of the Tyrolese, so +peculiarly appropriate to the scene. On, on they went, the white walls +of the church peeping through clustering ivy, the old and venerable +rectory next came in sight; a few minutes more, and the heavy gates of +Oakwood were thrown wide to receive them, and the carriages swept along +the well-known entrance. Every tree and shrub, and even flower, were now +looked on by Emmeline and Percy with increased and somewhat boisterous +expressions of delight. + +"Try if you cannot be still a very short time longer, dear Emmeline," +whispered the more restrained Ellen, whose eye had caught a glimpse of +Caroline's countenance, and who perceived in an instant her feelings +were not in unison with Emmeline's. She was right; Caroline could not +feel as did her sister. She was not the same light-hearted, innocent +being she had been when she quitted Oakwood; the appearance of the home +of her childhood vividly recalled all that had occurred since she had +mingled in the world, that world of which she had indulged so many +brilliant visions; and while Entmeline's laugh conveyed gladness in that +hour to all who heard it, Caroline leaned forward to conceal from her +companions the tears that stole silently down her cheek. + +A shout from Percy proclaimed the old hall in sight. A group of +domestics stood on the steps, and the setting sun threw its brilliant +hues on the mansion, as if with increased and unusual lustre that +venerable spot should welcome the return of the Hamilton family within +its sheltering walls. + + + + +CHAPTER IX. + + +"There wants but the guardian spirit of yon old Manor to render this +scene as perfect as her society would bid the present hours roll on in +unalloyed felicity to me," was Herbert Hamilton's observation some +little time after their return to Oakwood, as he stood, arm in arm with +his friend Arthur Myrvin, on the brow of a hill which overlooked, among +other beautiful objects, Greville Manor, now inhabited by strangers. + +Young Myrvin smiled archly, but ere their walk that evening was +concluded, he too had become interested in the being so dear to his +friend; for Herbert spoke in perfect confidence, secure of friendly +sympathy. Oakwood was to him as dear, perhaps even dearer than to +Emmeline, for his nature and tastes were not such as any amusement in +London could gratify. His recreation from the grave studies necessary +for the profession which he had chosen, was to wander forth with a +congenial spirit, and marking Nature in all her varied robes, adore his +Creator in His works as well as in His word. In London his ever active +mind longed intensely to do good, and his benevolent exertions +frequently exceeded his strength; it was his chief delight to seek the +dwellings of the poor, to relieve distress, alleviate affliction. The +prisoner in his cell, the bold and wilful transgressor of the laws of +God, these would he teach, and by gentle admonitions bring nearer to the +Throne of Grace. Yet notwithstanding the gratification which the +pursuits of Herbert gave to his parents, they often felt considerable +anxiety lest his health should suffer from his unceasing efforts, and +they rejoiced on that account when their removal to Oakwood afforded +their son a quieter and more healthful field of occupation. For miles +around Oakwood the name of Herbert Hamilton was never spoken without a +blessing. There he could do good; there he could speak of God, and +behold the fruits of his pious labours; there was Mr. Howard ever ready +to guide and to sympathise, and there was the field of Nature spread +before him to fill his heart with increased and glowing adoration and +reverential love. + +It was well for Herbert his parents were such as could understand and +sympathise in these exalted feelings; had harshness, or even neglect, +been extended over his childhood and his opening youth, happiness, such +as had gilded his life, would never have been his. + +As Emmeline had rejoiced, so also might have Herbert, as they neared the +gates of his home, had there not been one recollection to dim his +happiness. She who had shared in all his pleasures, who had shed a charm +over that spot, a charm which he had never felt so keenly as when he +looked for it, and found it not; the favourite playfellow of his +infancy, the companion of his youth, his plighted bride, she was in far +distant lands, and vainly on his first return home did Herbert struggle +to remove the weight of loneliness resting on his heart; he never +permitted it to be apparent, for to his family he was the same devoted +son and affectionate brother he had ever been, but painfully he felt it. +Mr. Myrvin and his son were now both inmates of Mr. Hamilton's family. +The illegality of the proceedings against the former, in expelling him +from his ministry of Llangwillan, had now been clearly proved, for the +earnestness of Mr. Hamilton permitted no delay; and tears of pious +gratitude chased down the cheeks of the injured man, as he recognised in +the person of his benefactor the brother of the suffering woman whom he +had sheltered, and whose bed of death he had deprived of its sting. The +persuasions of Mr. Hamilton succeeded in conquering his objections to +the plan, and he consented to make Oakwood his home for a short time, +ere he once more settled in his long-loved rectory. + +With Arthur, Ellen speedily resumed her place; the remembrance of that +neglected little girl had never left Mr. Myrvin's mind, and when, +radiant in animation and returning health and happiness, she hastily, +almost impetuously, advanced to meet him, he pressed her to his bosom +with the affection of a father; and even as a daughter Ellen devoted +herself to him during his residence at Oakwood. He had been the first in +England to treat her with kindness; he had soothed her childish sorrow, +and cheered her painful duties; he had been the first since her father's +death to evince interest for her, and though so many years had passed, +that the little girl was fast verging into womanhood, yet such things +were not forgotten, and Ellen endeavoured to prove the gratitude which +time had not effaced. + +Ellen was happy, her health almost entirely restored; but it was +scarcely possible for any observant person to live with her for any +time, without noticing the expression of pensive melancholy, of subdued +spirit, unnatural in one still so very young, that, unless animated by +any casual circumstances, ever rested on her features. Mr. Myrvin soon +noticed this, and rather wondered such should still be, when surrounded +by so much kindness and affection. Her gentleness and controlled temper, +her respectful devotion to her aunt and uncle, were such as to awaken +his warmest regard, and cause him to regret that shade of remaining +sadness so foreign to her age. Traces of emotion were so visible on her +cheeks one day, returning from a walk with Mr. Myrvin, that Mrs. +Hamilton felt convinced the tale of the past had been told, and fearing +her niece had done herself injustice, she scrupled no longer in alluding +to it herself. Mr. Myrvin was deeply affected at the tale, and much +relieved when the whole was known; for when he had praised her general +conduct, and approved of so many feelings and sentiments she had +acknowledged, and then tenderly demanded the cause of that depression he +sometimes witnessed, Ellen had given vent to a violent burst of emotion, +and spoken of a sin, a fearful sin, which long years of probation alone +could wash away. Her strong, her terrible temptation, her extreme +wretchedness and dreadful sufferings she had not mentioned, and, +consequently, when known, an air of even more gentle and more +affectionate interest pervaded Mr. Myrvin's manner towards her. Hearing +her one day express an ardent desire once more to visit Llangwillan, to +see again her mother's grave, he earnestly entreated Mrs. Hamilton's +permission for her to visit him for a few weeks: her company would, he +said, indeed shed joy over his home, and afford much pleasure to a +widowed sister who resided with him. Mrs. Hamilton smilingly consented, +and a flush of animated pleasure dyed Ellen's cheeks at the proposal. +For about a quarter of an hour she was all delight and animation, when +suddenly a thought entered her mind, banishing her unusual mirth, and +filling her eyes with tears. Her voice faltered audibly, as she warmly +thanked Mr. Myrvin and her aunt for their wish to increase her +happiness, but she would rather not leave home that year. The change was +so sudden, her manner so contradictory to her words, that Mrs. Hamilton, +believing some fanciful reason existed, would have insisted on her +compliance, and playfully accused her of unfounded caprice. There was, +however, a degree of earnest entreaty in her manner, that Mr. Myrvin +would not combat, and he expressed himself contented with her promise +for the following year. Mrs. Hamilton was not, however, quite so easily +satisfied. Ellen had been latterly so open with her, that anything like +concealment in her conduct gave her some little uneasiness; but she +could not withstand the imploring look of her niece, as she entreated +her not to think her capricious and wilful; she was sure Mrs. Hamilton +would approve of her reason, did she confess it. + +"I am not quite so sure of that," was her aunt's smiling reply; "but, +however, I will trust you, though I do not like mysteries," and the +subject was dismissed. + +The manners and conversation of Arthur Myrvin were such as to prepossess +both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton very much in his favour, and strengthened the +opinion they had already formed concerning him, on the word of their +son. The respectful deference with which he ever treated Caroline and +Emmeline often caused a laugh at his expense from Percy, but gratified +Mrs. Hamilton; Percy declared he stood as much in awe of his sisters as +if they were the highest ladies in the land. Arthur bore his raillery +with unruffled temper, but he felt the distance that fortune placed +between him and those fair girls, and he hoped, by reserve, to lessen +the danger that might in their society attack his peace. Emmeline +mistook this cautious reserve for coldness and distaste towards women, +and, with the arts of a playful child, she frequently endeavoured to +draw him from his abstraction, and render him a more agreeable +companion. + +There was still so very much of the child in Emmeline, though now +rapidly approaching her eighteenth birthday, she was still so very young +in manners and appearance, that the penetration of Mrs. Hamilton must +not be too severely criticised, if it failed in discovering that +intimately mingled with this childlike manner--the warm enthusiasm of a +kind nature--was a fund of deep reflection, and feelings quite equal to +her age. Mrs. Hamilton fancied the realities of life were still to her a +dream. Had any one spoken to her of the marriage of Emmeline as soon +taking place, she would have started at the idea, as a thing for some +years impossible; and that her affections might become engaged--that the +childlike, innocent, joyous Emmeline, whose gayest pleasures still +consisted in chasing with wild glee the butterflies as they sported on +the summer flowers, or tying garlands of the fairest buds to adorn her +own or her sister's hair, or plucking the apples from the trees and +throwing them to the village children as they sauntered at the orchard +gate--whose graver joys consisted in revelling in every poet that her +mother permitted her to read, or making her harp resound with wild, +sweet melody--whose laugh was still so unchecked and gay--that such a +being could think of love, of that fervid and engrossing passion, which +can turn the playful girl into a thinking woman, Mrs. Hamilton may be +pardoned if she deemed it as yet a thing that could not be; and she, +too, smiled at the playful mischief with which Emmeline would sometimes +claim the attention of young Myrvin, engage him in conversation, and +then, with good-humoured wit and repartee, disagree in all he said, and +compel him to defend his opinions with all the eloquence he possessed. + +With Ellen, young Myrvin was more at his ease; he recalled the days that +were past, and never felt with her the barrier which his sensitive +delicacy had placed between himself and her cousins. Arthur was proud, +more so than he was aware of himself. He would have considered himself +more humbled to love and sue for one raised by fortune or rank above +him, than in uniting with one, who in both these essentials was his +inferior. He was ambitious, but for honours and station obtained by his +own endeavours not conferred by another. From his earliest youth he had +grown up with so strong an impression that he was intended for the +Church, that he considered it impossible any other profession could suit +him better. When he mingled intimately at college with young men of +higher rank and higher hopes, he discovered too late that a clergyman's +life was not such as to render him most happy; but he could not draw +back, he would not so disappoint his father. He felt and knew, to obtain +the summit of his desires, to be placed in a public situation, where his +ambition would have full scope, required a much larger fortune than his +father possessed. He clothed himself in what he believed to be +resignation and contentment, but which was in truth a morbid +sensitiveness to his lot in life, which he imagined poverty would +separate from every other. Association with Herbert Hamilton, to whom in +frankness he confided these secret feelings, did much towards removing +their bitterness; and the admiration which he felt for Herbert, whose +unaffected piety and devotion to the Church he could not fail to +appreciate, partially reconciled his ambitious spirit to his station. +Yet the exalted ideas of Herbert were not entirely shared by Arthur, +whose thoughts were centred in a more stirring field of usefulness than +it would in all probability be his to fill. Herbert combated these +objections with so much eloquence, he pointed with such ardent zeal to +the crown eternal that would be his, when divine love had triumphed over +all earthly ambition, and his duties were done for love of Him, who had +ordained them, that when the time of his ordination came (which it did +very shortly after the commencement of this chapter), he would not have +drawn back, even had a more attractive profession been offered for his +acceptance. The friendship and countenance of Mr. Hamilton did much to +reconcile him to his lot. Mr. Howard's curate died suddenly, at the very +time that Mr. Hamilton was writing to the Marquis of Malvern, in +Arthur's favour, for a vacant living then at his disposal. Both now were +offered to the young man's choice, and Percy, even Mr. Hamilton himself, +were somewhat surprised that, without a moment's hesitation, he accepted +that under Mr. Howard, in the gift of Mr. Hamilton, inferior as it was +in point of worldly prospects to Lord Malvern's. His two parishes were +situated about nine or ten miles from Oakwood, and seven or eight from +Mr. Howard's rectory, and ere Mr. Myrvin returned to Llangwillan, he had +the satisfaction of seeing his son settled comfortably in his curacy, +performing his duties to the approval of his rector, and gaining by his +manner the affection of his parishioners. + +Herbert alone knew to its full extent the conquest his friend had +achieved over himself. His inclination led him to ambitious paths, where +he might in time obtain the notice of and mingle in the highest ranks; +but when the innate nobleness of his mind showed him where his duty lay, +when conscience loudly whispered now was the time to redeem the errors +of his college life, to prove his reverence for his father, to preserve +the kindness of those friends, exalted alike by rank and virtue, with +whom he still might mingle, with a strong effort he banished all +ambitious wishes, and devoted himself heart and soul to his ministerial +duties. + +Herbert would speak of his friend at home, of his self-conquering +struggles, till all would sympathise in the interest he so warmly +displayed, particularly Emmeline, with whom, sportive as she was, +Herbert from his childhood had had more thoughts and feelings in common +than he ever had with Caroline; and now, whether he spoke of Mary +Greville or Arthur Myrvin, in her he ever found a willing and attentive +auditor. Whenever he had ridden over to Hawthorndell, which he +frequently did, Emmeline would always in their next walk playfully draw +from him every particular of the "Lone Hermit," as in true poetic style +she termed Arthur. But there was no seriousness in her converse either +of or to young Myrvin. There was always mischief lurking in her +laughter-loving eye; always some wild joke betrayed in the arch smiles +ever lingering round her mouth; but mischief as it was, apparently the +mere wantonness of childhood, or very early youth, something in that +glance or smile ever bade young Myrvin's heart beat quicker than before, +and every pulse throb with what at first he deemed was pain. It was +relief to him to seek the quiet, gentle Ellen, and speak to her even as +he would to a sister, of all that had occurred to him since last they +met, so secure was he of sympathy in his future prospects, his present +cares and joys. But still that strange feeling lingered within his bosom +in his solitary hours, and he dwelt on it much more than on the gentle +accents of that fair girl whom in his boyhood he had termed his wife; +and stranger still, if it were pain, that it should urge him on to seek +it, that he could not rest till the glance of that eye, the tone of that +voice, had once more been seen and heard, till fresh excitement had been +given to thoughts and emotions which were unconsciously becoming the +mainsprings of his life. + +The undisturbed and happy calmness of Oakwood removed in a great measure +Caroline's painful feelings; all thoughts of Lord Alphingham were +gradually banished. The question how she could ever have been so blind +as to imagine that he had gained her affections, that she loved him, +returned more frequently than she could answer. + +But another vision stood forth to confront the darkened one of the +Viscount, and the contrast heightened the lustre of the former. Why had +she been so mad, so infatuated, as to reject with scorn and pride the +hand and heart of one so noble, so fond, so superior as Eugene St. Eval? +Now that the film had been removed from her eyes, that all the past +appeared in its true colours, that self-will and love of independence +had departed from her, the startling truth burst upon her mind, that +she had loved, truly loved, the very man who of all others would have +been the choice of both her parents--loved, and as his wife, might have +been one of the happiest, the most envied of her sex, had not that +indomitable spirit of coquetry urged her on, and lowered her to become a +very tool in the hands of the artful and designing Annie Grahame. + +Caroline loved; had she doubted the existence of that passion, every +letter from Mary Greville would have confirmed it; for we will not say +it was jealousy she felt, it was more self-condemnation and regret, +heightened at times almost into wretchedness. That St. Eval should so +soon forget her, that he should love again ere six months had passed, +could not fail to be a subject of bitter mortification to one in whose +bosom pride still rested. She would not have thus tormented herself with +turning and twisting Mary's information into such ideas, had she not +felt assured that he had penetrated her weakness, and despised her. +Fickleness was no part of St. Eval's character, of that she was +convinced; but it was natural he should cease to love, when he had +ceased to esteem, and in the society and charms of Louisa Manvers +endeavour to forget his disappointment. + +Through Emmeline's introductory letter, Lord St. Eval had become +sufficiently intimate with Mrs. Greville and Mary as to succeed in his +persuasions for them to leave their present residence, and occupy a +vacant villa on Lago Guardia, within a brief walk of Lord Delmont's, +feeling sure that an intimacy between Mrs. Manvers's family and that of +Mrs. Greville would be mutually pleasurable and beneficial; his friendly +wishes succeeded. Mrs. Greville found an able and sympathising +companion in the goodhearted, homely mother of the elegant and +accomplished Lord Delmont, and Mary's sadness was at once soothed and +cheered by the more animated Louisa, whose lot in life had never known +those murky clouds of sorrow and anxiety which had so often dimmed the +youth of Mary. The brother of Louisa had been all in all to her. She +felt as if life could not have another charm, as if not another joy was +wanting to render her lot perfect, until that other charm appeared, and +her ardent fancy quickly knew to its full extent the delights of female +companionship and sympathy. Their very dissimilitude of disposition +rendered dearer the ties of youthful friendship, and Emmeline sometimes +felt a pang of jealousy, as she read in the letters of her friend the +constant praises of Louisa Manvers, not that any diminution of early +affection breathed in them. Mary ever wrote so as to satisfy the most +exacting disposition; but it required all Mrs. Hamilton's eloquence to +persuade Emmeline she should rather rejoice than grieve that Mary had +found some one to supply her place. But vainly Emmeline tried in +playfulness to infect her brother Herbert with a portion of her +jealousy, for she knew not the contents of those letters Mary ever wrote +to Herbert, or she would not for one moment have imagined that either +Lord Delmont or St. Eval would usurp her brother's place. + +"Few things would give me greater pleasure," one of Mary's letters said, +"than to see the union of Lord St. Eval and my fair friend. It appears +to me strange that each, with affections disengaged, can remain blind to +the fascination of the other. They are well suited in every respect, +and I should fancy their union would certainly be a fair promise of +happiness. I live in hope, though as yet, I must confess, hope has but +very little to feed on." + +St. Eval still lingered at Monte Rosa, and it was well for the +inhabitants he did, for an event occurred which plunged that happy +valley from joy and gaiety into wailing and affliction, and even for a +brief interval infected the inhabitants of Oakwood with its gloom. Death +came, and tore away as his victim the widow's son, the orphan's brother. +The title of Delmont became extinct, for the last scion of that ancient +race had gone to his last home. He had gone with St. Eval and some other +young men on a fishing expedition, at some distance; a sudden squall had +arisen, and dispersing with much damage the little flotilla, compelled +the crews of each to seek their own safety. The sails of St. Eval's boat +were not furled quickly enough to escape the danger; it upset, and +though, after much buffeting and struggling with the angry waters, St. +Eval succeeded in bearing his insensible friend to land, his +constitution had received too great a shock, and he lingered but a few +brief weeks ere he was released from suffering. He had been thrown with +violence against a rock, producing a concussion of the brain, which, +combined with the length of time he was under water, produced fever, and +finally death. + +On the agony of the bereaved mother and sister it would be useless to +linger. St. Eval forgot his individual sorrows, and devoted himself, +heart and soul, in relieving those helpless sufferers, in which painful +task he was ably seconded by Mary and her mother, whose letters to their +friends at Oakwood, in that season of affliction, spoke of him in a +manner that, unconsciously to themselves, confirmed every miserable +suspicion in Caroline's mind, and even excited some such feeling in her +parents, whose disappointment was thus vividly recalled. That he should +ever seek their child again they deemed impossible, as did Caroline +herself; but still it was in vain they endeavoured to look with any +degree of pleasure to his union with another. + +Mr. Hamilton's family mourned Lord Delmont's early fate with sincere +regret, though they had known but little of him; but about this time the +thoughts of Mrs. Hamilton were turned in another direction, by a +circumstance which caused unaffected sorrow in her daughter and niece; +nor were she and her husband exempt. Lucy Harcourt had been so many +years a member of the family, she had been so associated from their +infancy in the affections of her pupils, that to part from her was the +bitterest pang of sorrow that Emmeline had yet known, and it was long +before Mrs. Hamilton herself could be reconciled to the idea of +separation; she had ever regarded and treated Miss Harcourt as a sister, +and intended that even when her family were settled, she should never +want another home. It was not only her own virtues that had endeared her +to Mrs. Hamilton; the services she had rendered her children, her active +and judicious share in the arduous task of education, demanded and +received from both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton the meed of gratitude and +esteem, and never once, in the seventeen years of Miss Harcourt's +residence amongst them, had they regretted the impulse which had offered +her a sheltering home and sympathising friends. + +Emmeline and Ellen were still her pupils, and Mrs. Hamilton intended +them to remain so for two or three years longer, even after they were +introduced, and it was on that account Miss Harcourt hesitated in +complying with the earnest entreaty of him whose happy home in her early +youth she had so nobly quitted, preferring to live by her own exertions +than to share the home of the man she loved, when he was married to +another. + +It had been very, very long ere disappointed affection had permitted her +to be cheerful. Her cousin, while rejoicing in the happy home she had +found, while congratulating her with fraternal interest on the kind +friends her mother's virtues had procured her, imagined not the agony +she was striving to conquer, the devoted love for him which disturbed +the peace around her, which otherwise she might have enjoyed to its full +extent; but she did conquer at length. That complete separation from him +did much towards restoring peace although perhaps love might still have +lingered; for what absence, what distance can change a woman's heart? +Yet it interfered no longer with happiness, and she answered Seymour's +constant and affectionate letters in his own style, as a sister would +have done. + +Sixteen years had passed, and not once had the cousins met. Womanhood in +its maturity was now Lucy's; every girlish feeling had fled, and she +perhaps thought young affections had gone also, but her cheek flushed +and every pulse throbbed, when she opened a long, long expected letter, +and found her cousin was a widower in declining health, which precluded +him from attending to his two motherless girls, imploring her, as her +duties in Mrs. Hamilton's family were nearly over, to leave England and +be the guardian spirit of his home, to comfort his affliction, to soothe +his bodily suffering, and learn to know and love his children, ere they +were fatherless as well as motherless, and deprived of every friend save +the aunt Lucy they had been taught to love, although to them unknown. +The spirit of deep melancholy breathing through this epistle called +forth for a few minutes a burst of tears from her who for so many years +had checked all selfish grief. + +"If I can comfort him, teach his children to love me, and be their +mother now they are orphans, oh, I shall not have lived in vain." Such +were the words that escaped her lips as she ceased to weep, and sat a +few minutes in thought, then sought Mrs. Hamilton and imparted all to +her. Mrs. Hamilton hesitated not a moment in her decision. Her own +regret at parting with her friend interfered not an instant with the +measure she believed would so greatly tend to the happiness of Miss +Harcourt. Mr. Hamilton seconded her; but the sorrow at separation, which +was very visible in the midst of their exertions for her welfare, both +gratified and affected Lucy. Never had she imagined how dear she was to +her pupils till the time of separation came; and when she quitted +England, it was with a heart swelling with interest and affection for +those she had left, and the fervent prayer that they might meet again. + +Mr. Seymour had said, were it not for his declining health, which +forbade the exertion of travelling, he would have come for her himself; +but if she would only consent to his proposal, if she could resign such +kind friends to devote herself to an irritable and ailing man, he would +send one under whose escort she might safely travel. Miss Harcourt +declined that offer, for Mr. Hamilton and Percy had both declared their +intention of accompanying her as far as Paris, and thence to Geneva, +where Mr. Seymour resided. + +It was long ere Mr. Hamilton's family became reconciled to this change; +Oakwood appeared so strange without the kind, the gentle Miss Harcourt, +whose steady yet mild firmness had so ably assisted Mrs. Hamilton in the +rearing of her now blooming and virtuous family. It required some +exertion, not only in Emmeline but in Ellen, to pursue their studies +with any perseverance, now that the dear friend who had directed and +encouraged them had departed. Ellen's grateful affection had the last +few years been returned with equal warmth; that prejudice which had at +first characterised Miss Harcourt's feelings towards her had entirely +vanished during her sufferings, and a few days before her departure, +Lucy with much feeling had admitted the uncalled for harshness with +which she too had treated her in her months of misery, and playfully yet +earnestly asked her forgiveness. They were alone, and Ellen's only +answer had been to throw herself on her friend's neck and weep. + +Before Christmas came, however, these painful feelings had been +conquered. Pleasing letters from Miss Harcourt arrived by almost every +post for one or other of the inmates of Oakwood, and their contents +breathing her own happiness, and the warmest, most affectionate interest +in the dear ones she had left, satisfied even Emmeline, from whom a +fortnight's visit from the Earl and Countess of Elmore had banished all +remaining trace of sadness. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton had welcomed but very +few resident visitors to Oakwood during the early years of their +children, but now it was with pleasure they exercised the hospitality so +naturally their own, and received in their own domains the visits of +their most intimate friends of London; but these visits afford us no +matter of entertainment, nor enter much into the purpose of this +history. A large party was never collected within the walls of Oakwood; +the intimate friends of Mr. Hamilton were but few, for it was only those +who thought on the essentials of life as himself with whom he mingled in +the familiar position of host. The Marquis of Malvern's family alone +remained to spend Christmas with them, and added much to the enjoyment +of that domestic circle. Their feelings and pursuits were in common, for +the Marchioness of Malvern was a mother after Mrs. Hamilton's own stamp, +and her children had benefited by similar principles; the same +confidence existed between them. The Marchioness had contrived to win +both the reverence and affection of her large family, though +circumstances had prevented her devoting as much of her own time and +care on their education as had Mrs. Hamilton. Her eldest daughter was +married; her second, some few years older than Caroline, was then +staying with her, and only one of the three who accompanied her to +Oakwood was as yet introduced. Lady Florence was to make her _debut_ the +following season, with Emmeline Hamilton; and Lady Emily was still, when +at home, under the superintendence of a governess and masters. Lord +Louis, the Marchioness's youngest child, a fine lad of sixteen, with his +tutor, by Mr. Hamilton's earnest desire, also joined their happy party, +and by his light-hearted humour and fun, added not a little to the +amusements of the evening. But it was Lady Gertrude, the eldest of the +three sisters then at Oakwood, that Mrs. Hamilton earnestly hoped might +take the place Annie Grahame had once occupied in Caroline's affections. +Hers was a character much resembling her brother's St. Eval, to whom her +features also bore a striking resemblance. She might, at a first +introduction, have been pronounced proud, but, as is often the case, +reserve was mistaken for pride. Yet in her domestic circle she was ever +the gayest, and the first to contribute to general amusement. In +childhood she had stood in a degree alone, for her elder sisters were +four or five years older than herself, and Florence and Emily four and +five years younger. She had learned from the first to seek no sympathy, +and her strong feeling might perhaps by being constantly smothered, at +length have perished within her, and left her the cold unloving +character she appeared to the world, had it not been for the devoted +affection of her brother Eugene, in whom she soon learned to confide +every emotion as it rose, at that age when girls first become sensible +that they are thinking and feeling beings. They quickly became sensible +that in almost every point they were kindred souls, and the name of +Eugene and Gertrude were ever heard together in their family. Their +affection was at length a proverb among their brothers and sisters, and +perhaps it was this great similarity of disposition and the regard felt +for her noble brother, that first endeared Gertrude to Mrs. Hamilton, +whose wishes with regard to her and Caroline promised fulfilment. Some +chord of sympathy had been struck within them, and they were very soon +attached companions, although at first Lady Gertrude had hesitated, for +she could not forget the tale of scornfully-rejected love imparted to +her by her brother. She had marked the conduct of Caroline from the +beginning. She too had hoped that in her she might have welcomed a +sister, although her observant eye had marked some defects in her +character which the ardent St. Eval had not perceived. Coolness during +the past season had subsisted between them, for Caroline had taken no +trouble to conquer Lady Gertrude's reserve, and the latter was too proud +to make advances. In vain Lord St. Eval had wished a better +understanding should exist between them, while Caroline was under the +influence of Miss Grahame, it was impossible for her to associate in +sympathy with Lady Gertrude Lyle; yet now that they mingled in the +intimacy of home, now the true character of Caroline was apparent, that +Lady Gertrude had time and opportunity to remark her devotion to her +parents, more particularly to her mother, her affectionate kindness to +her brothers and Emmeline and Ellen, her very many sterling virtues, +which had previously been concealed, but which were discovered by the +tributes of grateful affection constantly offered to her by the +inhabitants of the village, by the testimony of Mr. Howard, the +self-conquests of temper and inclination for the sake of others, which +the penetrating eye of Lady Gertrude discovered, and, above all, the +spirit of piety and meekness which now characterised her actions, all +bade the sister of St. Eval reproach herself for condemning without +sufficient evidence. For her conduct to her brother there was indeed no +excuse, and on that subject alone, with regard to Caroline, Lady +Gertrude felt bewildered, and utterly unable to comprehend her. It was a +subject on which neither chose to speak, for it was a point of delicacy +to both. Had Lady Gertrude been excluded from her brother's confidence, +she too might have spoken as carelessly and admiringly of him as his +sisters constantly did; but she could not so address the girl who had +rejected him, it would be pleading his cause, from which she revolted +with a repugnance natural to her high-minded character. + +"If he still love her, as his letters would betray, let him come and +plead his own cause; never will I say anything that can make Caroline +believe I am in secret negotiating for him." Such was the thought that +ever checked her, when about to speak of him in the common course of +conversation, and baffled all Caroline's secret wishes that she would +speak in his praise as her sisters and Lord Louis so constantly did. + +But even as delicacy prevented all allusion to him from the lips of Lady +Gertrude, so it actuated Caroline with perhaps even greater force. Would +she betray herself, and confess that she repented her rejection of St. +Eval? would she by word or deed betray that, would he return to her, she +would be his own, and feel blessed in his affections? She shrunk almost +in horror from doing so, and roused her every energy to conceal and +subdue every emotion, till she could hear his name with composure. Yet +more than once had Lady Gertrude, as she silently watched her +countenance, fancied she perceived sufficient evidence to bid her wonder +what could have induced Caroline's past conduct, to imagine that if St. +Eval could forget that, he might be happy yet; and for his sake, +conquering her scruples, once she spoke openly of him, when she and +Caroline were visiting some poor cottagers alone. She spoke of his +character, many points of which, though she admired, she regretted, as +rendering him less susceptible of happiness than many who were less +gifted. "Unless he find a wife to love him as he loves--one who will +devote herself to him alone, regardless of rank or fortune, Eugene never +can be happy; and if he pass through life, unblest by the dearest and +nearest ties, he will be miserable." So much she did say, and added her +earnest wishes for his welfare, in a tone that caused the tears to +spring to the eyes of her companion, who permitted her to speak for some +time without in any way replying. + +"What a pity you are his sister," she replied, rallying all her energies +to speak frankly and somewhat sportively; "a woman like yourself is +alone worthy of Lord St. Eval." + +"You are wrong," replied Lady Gertrude, sadly; "I am much too cold and +reserved to form, as a wife, the happiness of such a character as my +brother's. We have grown together from childhood, we have associated +more intimately and affectionately with each other than with any other +members of our family, and therefore Eugene knows and loves me. The wife +of St. Eval should be of a disposition as ingenuous and open as his is +reserved; her affection, her sympathy, must make his felicity. He is +grave--too grave; she should be playful, but not childish. Even if she +have some faults, with the love for which my brother pines, the +ingenuousness unsullied by the most trifling artifice, her very faults +would bind her more closely to him." + +Caroline was silent, and Lady Gertrude soon after changed the subject. +Had she heard no reports of Caroline's preference of Lord Alphingham, of +the affair which had somewhat hurried Mr. Hamilton's departure from +London, that conversation would have confirmed her suspicions, that her +brother was no subject of indifference to Caroline. She longed for her +to be candid with her, to hear the whole truth from her own lips. The +happiness of the young Earl was so dear to her, that she would have done +much, very much to secure it; yet so far she could not force herself to +go, particularly as he had given her no charge to do so. She little knew +that Caroline would have given worlds, had they been at her disposal, to +have confided all to her: her repentance, her folly, her earnest prayers +for amendment, to become at length worthy of St. Eval. Caroline loved, +truly loved, because she esteemed, Lady Gertrude; her friendship for her +differed as much from that she believed she had felt for Annie Grahame, +as her regard for St. Eval was unlike that which Lord Alphingham had +originated. Once, the superiority of Lady Gertrude's character would +have rendered her an object of almost dislike to Caroline, as possessing +virtues she admired but would not imitate. Now those virtues were +appreciated, her own inferiority was felt more painfully; and while +associating with her, the recollections of the past returned more than +ever, embittered by remorse. Sir George Wilmot and Lilla Grahame were +also guests at Oakwood. The former declared he had seldom anchored in +moorings so congenial to his taste. In Lilla the effects of happiness +and judicious treatment were already distinctly visible. The young men +spent the Christmas recess at home, and added much to the hilarity of +their domestic circle; nor must we forget Arthur Myrvin, who spent as +much of his time at Oakwood, as his duties permitted; the friendship of +Herbert Hamilton doing much to remove the bitter feelings which often +still possessed him. He would at first have shunned the invitation, but +vainly he strove to do so; for there was one fair object there who held +him with an iron chain, which excited while bound him. He could not +break it asunder, though peace he felt was flying from his grasp. + + + + +CHAPTER X. + + +"Gertrude's letters this morning have brought her some extraordinarily +agreeable tidings," exclaimed Lady Florence Lyle, gaily, as her sister +entered the breakfast-room, rather later than usual. + +"On my honour, her countenance is rather a clearer index than usual +to-day," observed the Marquis, laughing. "Well, Gertrude, what is it?" + +"News from Eugene," exclaimed Lady Emily and Lord Louis in a breath; "he +is going to be married. Either Miss Manvers or Miss Greville have +consented to take him for better or worse," added Lord Louis, laughing. +"Gertrude, allow me to congratulate you on the gift of a new sister, +who, as the wife of my right honourable brother the Earl of St. Eval, +will be dearer to you than any other bearing the same relationship." + +"Reserve your congratulations, Louis, till they are needed," replied +Lady Gertrude, fixing her eyes steadily on Caroline's face, which was +rapidly changing from pale to crimson. + +"I have no such exciting news to communicate," she added, very quietly. +"Eugene is in England, and alone." + +"In England!" repeated Percy, starting up; "I am delighted to hear it. +I just know enough of him to wish most ardently to know more. Will he +not join us? He surely will not winter at Castle Malvern alone, like a +hermit, surrounded by snows; if he do, he is a bachelor confirmed: not a +hope for his restoration to the congenial warmth of life." + +"He has no such intention," replied Lady Gertrude, smiling; "our present +happy circle has too many attractions to permit his resting quietly in +solitude, and, with Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton's kind permission, will join +us here by Christmas Eve." + +"There are few whom we shall be so pleased to welcome as my noble young +friend St. Eval," answered Mr. Hamilton, instantly; "few whose society I +so much prize, both for myself and my sons." + +"And the minstrel's harp shall sleep no more, but wake her boldest +chords to welcome such a guest to Oakwood's aged walls," exclaimed +Emmeline, gaily. + +"Thus I give you leave to welcome him, but if he take my place with you +in our evening walks, I shall wish him back again at Monte Rosa in a +twinkling," observed Lord Louis, in the same gay tone, and looking +archly at his fair companion; "when Eugene appears my reign is always +over." + +"Louis, I shall put you under the command of Sir George Wilmot," said +his father, laughing, however, with the rest of the circle. + +"Ay, ay, do; the sea is just the berth for such youngsters as these," +remarked the old Admiral, clapping his hand kindly on the lad's +shoulder. + +While such _badinage_ was passing, serious thoughts were occupying the +minds of more than one individual of that circle. It would be difficult +to define the feelings of Caroline as she heard that St. Eval was in +England, and coming to Oakwood. Had he so soon conquered his affections, +that he could associate with lier on terms of friendly intimacy? She +longed to confess to her mother her many conflicting feelings; she felt +that her earnest prayers were her own, but shame prevented all +disclosure. She could not admit she now loved that very man whom she had +once treated with such contempt and scorn, rejected with proud +indifference. Even her mother, her fond mother, would say her present +feelings were a just punishment for the past; and that she could not +bear. Inwardly she resolved that not a word should pass her lips; she +would suffer unshrinkingly, and in silence. + +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, and the Marquis and Marchioness of Malvern also +became engrossed with the same subject; the latter had seen and highly +approved of their son's attentions to Caroline, and appeared gratified +by the manner in which she accepted them. Disappointment and indignation +for a time succeeded the young Earl's departure for the Continent, but +the friendship so long subsisting between the families prevented all +unpleasant feeling, except, perhaps, a little towards Caroline herself. +They gladly welcomed the intelligence that St. Eval was in England, and +wished to join them at Oakwood, for they hailed it as a sign that his +fancy had been but fleeting, and was now entirely conquered. Mr. and +Mrs. Hamilton thought the same, though to them it was far more a matter +of disappointment than rejoicing; but hope mingled almost unconsciously +with regret, and they too were pleased that he was about to become their +guest. + +Lady Gertrude's eyes were more than once during that morning fixed on +Caroline, as the subject of St. Eval's travels and residence abroad were +discussed, but she was silent; whatever were her secret reflections, +they were confined within the recesses of her own heart. + +Lord St. Eval came, and with him fresh enjoyment for Percy and Herbert; +and even for young Myrvin, who found nothing in the society of the young +nobleman to wound his pride by recalling to his mind his own inferior +rank. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton fancied they had read his character before; +but their previous intimacy had not discovered those many pleasing +qualifications which domestic amusements and occupations betrayed. Much +of his reserve was now banished; his manners were as easy and as free +from pride or hauteur as his conversation, though chaste and +intellectual, was from pedantry. To all the individuals of that happy +circle he was the same; as kind and as gay to Emmeline and Ellen as to +his own sisters; there might, perhaps, have been a degree of reserve in +his demeanour towards Caroline, but that, except to those principally +concerned, might not have been remarked, for his intercourse with her +was even more general than with others. Emmeline and Ellen, or even +Lilla, was often his selected companion for a walk, but such an +invitation never extended to Caroline, and yet he could never be said +either to neglect or shun her; and she shrinking from attracting his +notice as much as she had once before courted it, an impassable yet +invisible barrier seemed to exist between them. In St. Eval's manner, +his mother and Lady Gertrude read that his feelings were not conquered; +that he was struggling to subdue them, and putting their subjection to +the proof; but Caroline and her parents imagined, and with bitter pain, +that much as he had once esteemed and loved her, a feeling of +indifference now possessed him. + +Herbert found pleasure in the society of the young Earl, for St. Eval +had penetrated the secret of his and Mary's love; though with innate +delicacy he refrained from noticing it farther than constantly to make +Mary his theme during his walks with Herbert, and speaking of her +continually to the family, warming the heart of Emmeline yet more in his +favour, by his sincere admiration of her friend. He gave an excellent +account of her health, which she had desired him to assure her friends +the air of Italy had quite restored. He spoke in warm admiration of her +enthusiasm, her love of nature, of all which called forth the more +exalting feelings; of her unaffected goodness, which had rendered her a +favourite, spite of her being a foreigner and a Protestant, throughout +the whole hamlet of Monte Rosa, and as he thus spoke, the anxious eye of +Mrs. Hamilton ever rested on her Herbert, who could read in that glance +how true and fond was the sympathy, which not once since he had confided +in her his happiness, had he regretted that he had sought. + +The remaining period of the Marquis of Malvern's sojourn at Oakwood +passed rapidly away without any event of sufficient importance to find a +place in these pages. They left Oakwood at the latter end of January for +St. Eval's beautiful estate in Cornwall, where they intended to remain a +month ere they went to London, about the same time as Mr. Hamilton's +family. That month was a quiet one at Oakwood; all their guests had +departed, and, except occasional visits from Arthur Myrvin and St. +Eval, their solitude was uninterrupted. + +St. Eval's estate was situated a few miles inland from the banks of the +Tamar, one of the most beautiful spots bordering that most beautiful +river. He was wont leisurely to sail down the stream to Plymouth, and +thence to Oakwood, declaring the distance was a mere trifle; but +nevertheless it was sufficiently long for Mr. Hamilton sometimes to +marvel at the taste of his noble friend, which led him often twice and +regularly once a week to spend a few hours, never more, at Oakwood, when +he knew they should so soon meet in London. St. Eval did not solve the +mystery, but continued his visits, bringing cheerfulness and pleasure +whenever he appeared, and bidding hope glow unconsciously in each +parent's heart, though had they looked for its foundation, they would +have found nothing in the young Earl's manner to justify its +encouragement. + +In March Mr. Hamilton's family once more sought their residence in +Berkeley Square, about a week after the Marquis of Malvern's arrival; +and this season, the feelings of the sisters, relative to the gaieties +in which they were now both to mingle, were more equal. The bright hues +with which Caroline had before regarded them had faded--too soon and too +painfully, indeed. + +She had been deceived, and in that word, when applied to a young, +aspiring, trusting mind, what anguish does it not comprise. True, she +deserved her chastisement, not only that she had acted the part of a +deceiver to one who trusted her far more than she had done Lord +Alphingham, but wilfully she had blinded herself to her own feelings, +that she might prove her independence; yet these facts lessened not the +bitterness of feeling which was now often hers. But she did not +relinquish society; the dread of encountering Lord Alphingham was not +strong enough to overcome her secret wish that, by her conduct in +society, she might prove to St. Eval that, although unworthy to be +selected as his wife, she would yet endeavour to regain his esteem. She +had resolved to think less of herself and more of others, and thus +become more amiable in their sight, and not feel so many mortifications, +as by her constant desire for universal homage, she had previously +endured. She knew the task was difficult so to conquer herself, and +doubting her own strength, was led to seek it where alone it could be +found. To none did she confess these secret feelings and determination; +calmly and steadily she looked forward, and so successfully had she +schooled herself to submission, that no word or sign as yet betrayed to +her parents the real state of her affections. + +Emmeline's dislike to London had abated as much as had her sister's +glowing anticipations. They were now only to be four months in the +metropolis; the strict routine of masters, etc., was at an end, and she +was to accompany Mrs. Hamilton whenever she went out. She left Oakwood +with regret, and the society and conversation of Arthur Myrvin were +missed more often in London than she chose to confess, but enjoyment was +ever found for Emmeline--life was still a romance to her. In the society +of London, as in the cottages of Oakwood, she was beloved, and she was +happy; but those of the opposite sex, much as they thronged around her, +had no more thought of demanding such a being in marriage, than she had +of what is termed making conquests. It was therefore with feelings of +much less anxiety Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton mingled in society this season, +for the conduct of both their daughters was such as to afford them +satisfaction. + +Some changes had taken place in many of the personages with whom we are +acquainted, since the last time we beheld them. Short and evanescent is +fashionable popularity. Lord Alphingham's reign might be, in a degree, +considered over. Some rumours had been floating over the town at that +time of the year when, in all probability, he thought himself most +secure, that is, when London society is dispersed; rumours which had the +effect of excluding him from most of those circles in which Mr. +Hamilton's family mingled, and withdrawing from him in a great measure +the friendship of Montrose Grahame, who, the soul of honour himself, +shrunk from any connection with one whose reputation the faintest breath +had stained. Yet still there were many who regarded these rumours as the +mere whisperings of envy, and with them he was as much a favourite as +ever. Amongst these was Annie Grahame, whose marked preference more than +atoned to the Viscount for her father's coldness. In vain Grahame +commanded that his daughter should change her manner towards him. She, +who had prevailed on a daughter to disobey this very mandate from the +lips of an indulgent parent, was not likely to regard that of the father +whose sternness and often uncalled-for severity had completely alienated +her affections, and Lord Alphingham had now another urgent reason to +flatter Annie's vanity and make her his own. + +A distant relation and godmother of Lady Helen Grahame had, most +unexpectedly, left her at her death sole heiress to a handsome fortune, +which was to descend undivided to her elder daughter, and thus to +Annie's other attractions was now added that all-omnipotent charm, the +knowledge that she was an heiress, not perhaps to any very large +property, but quite sufficient to most agreeably enlarge the fortune of +any gentleman who would venture to take her for better or worse. One +would have supposed that now every wish of this aspiring young lady was +gratified; but no. It mattered not, though crowds were at her feet, that +when they met, which was very seldom, even Caroline was no longer her +rival, all the affection she possessed was lavished without scruple on +Lord Alphingham, and every thought was turned, every effort directed +towards the accomplishment of that one design. So deeply engrossed was +she in this resolution, that she had no time nor thought to annoy +Caroline, as she had intended, except in exercising to its full extent +her power over Lord Alphingham whenever she was present, in which the +Viscount's own irritated feelings towards her ably assisted. Caroline +felt the truth of her mother's words, that Lord Alphingham, indeed, had +never honourably loved her; that Annie's conduct justified Mrs. +Hamilton's prejudice, and as her heart shrunk in sadness from the +retrospection of these, truths, it swelled in yet warmer affection, not +only towards her fond and watchful mother, but towards the friends that +mother's judicious choice selected and approved. + +Cecil Grahame had been continually in the habit of drawing upon his +mother's cash for the indulgence of his extravagant pleasures, and Lady +Helen had thoughtlessly satisfied all his wishes, without being in the +least aware of the evil propensities she was thus encouraging. It was +not till Cecil was about to leave Eton for the University, that she was +at all startled at the amount of his debts, and then her principal alarm +arose more from the dread of her husband's anger towards her son, if he +discovered the fact, than from any maternal anxiety for Cecil's unsteady +principles. Her only wish was to pay off these numerous debts, without +disclosing them to the husband she so weakly dreaded. How could she +obtain so large a sum, even from her own banker, and thus apply it, +without his knowledge and assistance? The very anticipation of so much +trouble terrified her almost into a fit of illness; and rather than +exert her energies or expose her son to his father's wrath, she would +descend to deceit, and implore his assistance in obtaining the whole +amount, on pretence that she required it for the payment of her own +expenses and debts of honour. She imagined that she had sunk too low in +her husband's esteem to sink much lower; and therefore, if her requiring +money to discharge debts of honour exposed her yet more to his contempt, +it was not of much consequence; besides if it were, she could not help +it, a phrase with which Lady Helen ever contrived to silence the rebukes +of conscience when they troubled her, which, however, was not often. + +She acted accordingly; but as she met the glance of her husband, a +glance in which sadness triumphed over severity, she was tempted to +throw herself at his feet, and beseech him not to imagine her the +dissipated woman her words betrayed, for Lady Helen loved her husband as +much as such a nature could love; but, of all things, she hated a scene, +and though every limb trembled with emotion, she permitted him to leave +her, stung almost to madness by the disclosure her request implied. Did +she play? was that fatal propensity added to her numerous other errors? +and yet never had anything fallen under his eye to prove that she did. +And what debts had she contracted to demand such a sum? Grahame felt she +had deceived him; that the money had never been expended on herself; but +he would not torture himself by demanding a true and full disclosure. +The conduct of his children had ever grieved him, and fearing too justly +the request of his wife related to them, madly and despairingly he +closed his eyes and his lips, thus probably encouraging an evil which he +might have prevented. He delivered the stated sum, and that same day +made over to his wife's own unchecked disposal the whole of that fortune +which, when first inherited, she had voluntarily placed in his hands as +trustee for herself and for her daughter, to whom it would descend. +Briefly he resigned the office she had entreated him to take, sternly +observing, that Annie had better moderate her expectations, as, did Lady +Helen frequently incur such heavy debts, not much was likely to descend +to her daughter. It was a great deal too much trouble for Lady Helen to +expostulate, and if any feeling predominated to conquer the pang +occasioned by Grahame's determination, it was relief, that she might now +assist Cecil, if he should require it, without applying to his father. + +Montrose Grahame was naturally not only an excellent but a judicious +man; but to a great extent, his judgment had deserted him when he +selected Lady Helen as his wife. Had he been united to a woman in whose +judgment and firmness he could confide, he would have been quite as much +respected and beloved in his family as were Mr. Hamilton and the Marquis +of Malvern in theirs; but now neither respect nor affection was +extended towards him, except, perhaps, by Lilla, and unconsciously by +Lady Helen. Severity constantly indulged, was degenerating into +moroseness; and feelings continually controlled, giving place to +coldness and distrust. It was fortunate for Lilla's happiness and, as it +afterwards proved, for her father's, that she was now under the kindly +care of Mrs. Douglas, for constantly irritated with his elder girl, who, +it must be owned, gave him abundant cause, that irritation and suspicion +would undoubtedly have extended towards his younger, and at once have +destroyed the gentleness and amiability which Mrs. Douglas was so +carefully and tenderly fostering. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton saw this change, +and regretted it; but their influence, powerful as it was, could be of +no avail in counteracting the effect of domestic annoyances, paternal +anxiety, and constantly aroused irritation. Of all the evils in life, +domestic discord is one of the greatest, one under which the heart +bleeds the most; want of sympathy always prevents or banishes affection. +Had Grahame been a careless, selfish man, he might possibly have been +happier; his very sensitiveness was his bane. The silly weaknesses of +his wife might partially have lessened his love for her, but his +children, with all their faults, were dear to their father; they knew +not, guessed not, how much his happiness was centred in theirs; how his +heart was rent with anguish every time that duty, as he imagined, called +on him to be severe. Had he followed the dictates of his nature, he +would rather have ruined his children by over-indulgence than severity; +but the hope of counteracting the effect of their mother's weakness had +guided his mistaken treatment. Could his inmost soul have been read by +those who condemned his harshness, they would have sincerely pitied the +keen and agonized sensitiveness with which he felt the alienation of +their affections. Much as he saw to blame in Annie, had she ever given +him one proof of filial love, all would have been forgiven, and the +blessing of a parent been her own in all she did or wished. Had Cecil +confessed those errors of which he was conscious that he was guilty to +his father, he would have found a true and tender friend, who would have +led his naturally good, though too yielding, character aright, and +misery to both might have been spared, but such was not to be; and in +the fates of Alfred Greville and Cecil Grahame we may chance to perceive +that, whatever may be the difficulties surrounding her, however blighted +may appear the produce of her anxious labours, yet reward will attend +the firm, religious mother, however difficult may be the actual +fulfilment of her duties; while that mother who, surrounded by luxury +and prosperity, believes, by unqualified indulgence, she is firmly +binding her offspring in the observance of love and duty, will reap but +too bitter fruit. + +It was when in the presence of the Duchess of Rothbury Caroline felt +most uncomfortable. The family were as cordial as ever, but there was +somewhat in the cold, penetrating eye of her Grace, that bade her almost +unconsciously shrink from meeting its glance. In the previous season the +Duchess had ever singled Caroline out as an object of her especial +regard, a circumstance so unusual in one of her character, that it +rendered her present haughty coldness more difficult to bear. Caroline +would have borne it in silence had it only extended towards herself, but +it appeared as if both Emmeline and Ellen shared the contempt she +perhaps had justly called forth on herself, as the Duchess, tenacious of +her penetrative powers, feared to honour either of them with her favour, +lest she should be again deceived. Caroline longed to undeceive her on +this point, to give her a just estimate of both her sister and cousin's +character, acknowledge how far superior in filial respect and affection, +as well as in innate integrity and uprightness, they were to herself; +but her mother entreated her to let time do its work, and wait till the +Duchess herself discovered they were not what she either believed they +were or might be, and she checked her wish. + +We will here mention a circumstance which occurred in Mr. Hamilton's +family soon after their arrival in town, which occasioned Mrs. Hamilton +some uneasiness. Ellen's health was now perfectly re-established, and on +Miss Harcourt's unexpected departure, Mrs. Hamilton had determined on +introducing her niece with Emmeline in the present season. If Lucy had +remained in her family, Ellen would not have made her _debut_ till the +following year, not that her age was any obstacle, for there were only +eight months difference between her and Emmeline, but her retiring +disposition and delicacy of constitution caused Mrs. Hamilton to think +this plan the most advisable. When, however, there was no longer any +excuse with regard to failing health, and no Miss Harcourt with whom her +evenings at home might be more agreeably spent, Mrs. Hamilton, by the +advice of her husband, changed her intention; and Emmeline even made a +joke with Ellen on the admirable fun they should have together, +rejoicing that such an important event in the lives of each should take +place on the same day. It so happened that Ellen never appeared to enter +into her cousin's everlasting merriment on this subject; still she said +nothing for or against till the day all-important with the ordering +their elegant dresses for the occasion. Timidly and hesitatingly she +then ventured to entreat her aunt still to adhere to her first plan, and +allow her to remain quietly at home, under the care of Ellis, till the +following year. Mrs. Hamilton and her cousins looked at her with +astonishment; but the former smilingly replied she could not indulge her +niece in what appeared an unfounded fancy. The dress she should order, +for she hoped Ellen would change her mind before the day arrived, as, +unless a very good reason were given, she could not grant her request. +Ellen appeared distressed; but the conversation changed, and the subject +was not resumed till the day actually arrived, in the evening of which +she was to accompany her aunt to a ball at the Marchioness of Malvern's, +and two days after they were all engaged at a dinner-party at the Earl +of Elmore's. + +Summoning all her courage, Ellen entered her aunt's boudoir in the +morning, and again made her request with an earnestness that almost +startled Mrs. Hamilton, particularly as it was accompanied by a +depression of manner, which she now did not very often permit to obtain +ascendency. With affectionate persuasiveness she demanded the reason of +this extraordinary resolution, and surprise gave way to some +displeasure, when she found Ellen had really none to give. Her only +entreaty was that she might not be desired to go out till the next year. + +"But why, my dear Ellen? You must have some reason for this intended +seclusion. Last year I fancied you wished much to accompany us, and I +ever regretted your delicate health prevented it. What has made you +change your mind so completely? Have you any distaste for the society in +which I mingle?" + +Falteringly, and almost inaudibly, Ellen answered, "None." + +"Is it a religious motive? Do your principles revolt from the amusements +which are now before you? Tell me candidly, Ellen. You know nothing +displeases me so much as mystery? I can forgive everything else, for +then I know our relative positions, and am satisfied you are not going +far wrong; but when every reason is studiously concealed, I cannot guess +the truth, and I must fancy it is, at least, a mistaken notion blinding +your better judgment. I did not expect a second mystery from you, +Ellen." + +Mrs. Hamilton's expressive voice clearly denoted she was displeased, and +her niece, after two or three ineffectual efforts to prevent it, finally +burst into tears. + +"I do not wish to be harsh with you, or accuse you unjustly," continued +her aunt, softened at the unaffected grief she beheld, "but if your +reason be a good one, why do you so carefully conceal it? You have been +lately so very open with me, and appeared to regard me so truly as your +friend, that your present conduct is to me not only a riddle, but a +painful reflection. Is it because your conscience forbids? Perhaps in +your solitary moments you have fancied that worldly amusements, even in +the moderate way in which we regard them, unfits us for more serious +considerations, and you fear perhaps to confess that such is your +reason, because it will seem a reproach to me. If such really be your +motive, do not fear to confess it, my dear girl; I should be the very +last to urge you to do anything that is against your idea of what is +right. To prove the fallacy of such reasoning, to show you that you may +be truly religions without eccentricity, I certainly should endeavour to +do, but I would not force you to go out with me till my arguments had +convinced you. I fancy, by your blushing cheek, that I have really +guessed the cause of your extraordinary resolution, and sorry as I shall +be if I have, yet any reason, however mistaken, is better than a +continued mystery." + +"Indeed, indeed, I am not so good as you believe me," replied Ellen, +with much emotion. "It is not the religious motive you imagine that +urges me to act contrary to your wishes. Did you know my reason, I am +sure you would not blame me; but do not, pray do not command me to tell +you. I must obey, if you do, and then"-- + +"And then, if I approve of your reason, as you say I shall, what is it +that you fear? Why, if your conscience does not reproach you, do you +still hide it from me?" + +Ellen was painfully silent. Mrs. Hamilton continued, in a tone of marked +displeasure, "I fear I am to find myself again deceived in you, Ellen, +though in what manner as yet I know not. I will not do such extreme +violence to your inclinations as to command you to yield to my wishes. +If you desire so much to remain at home, do so; but I cannot engage to +make any excuse for you. Neither failing health nor being too young, can +I now bring forward; I must answer all inquiries for you with the truth, +that your own wishes, which I could not by persuasion overcome, alone +keep you at, home. My conscience will still be clear from the +reproaches so plentifully showered on me by the world last season, that +I feared to bring forward my orphan niece with my daughters, lest her +charms should rival theirs." + +"Did the ill-natured and ignorant dare to say such a thing of you?" +demanded Ellen, startled at this remark. + +"They knew not the cause of your never appearing in public, and +therefore, as appearances were against me, scrupled not to condemn." + +"And do you heed them? Do these remarks affect you?" exclaimed Ellen, +earnestly. + +"No, Ellen. I have done my duty; I will still do it, undisturbed by such +idle calumnies, even should they now be believed by those whose opinions +I value, who, from your seclusion, may imagine they have good reason. In +my conduct towards you the last two years I have nothing to reproach +myself." + +"The last two years. Oh, never, never, from the first moment I was under +your care, never can your conduct to me have given you cause for +self-reproach, dearest aunt. Oh, do not say that the gratification of my +wishes will give rise to a suspicion so unjust, so unfounded," entreated +Ellen, seizing with impetuosity the hand of her aunt. + +"In all probability it will; but do not speak in this strain now, Ellen, +it accords not well with the mystery of your words," and Mrs. Hamilton +coldly withdrew her hand. There was a moment's silence, for Ellen had +turned away, pained to her heart's core, and soon after she quitted the +room to seek her own, where, throwing herself on a low seat by the side +of her couch, she gave way to an unrestrained and violent flow of tears. +Mrs. Hamilton little knew the internal struggle her niece was enduring, +the cause of her seclusion; that the term of her self-condemned +probation was not fulfilled, that the long, tedious task was not +accomplished; that it was for this purpose she so earnestly desired that +her time might not be occupied by amusement, till her task was done, the +errors of her earlier years atoned. Mrs. Hamilton had seldom felt more +thoroughly displeased and hurt with her niece than at the present +moment. Gentle, and invulnerable as she ever seemed to irritation, open +as the day herself, she had ever endeavoured to frame her children's +characters in the like manner; ingenuousness always obtained +forgiveness, whatever might have been the mistake or fault. Ellen had +always been a subject of anxiety and watchfulness; but the last two +years her reserve had so entirely given place to candour, that +solicitude had much decreased, till recalled by the resolution we have +recorded. Had Ellen alleged any reason whatever, all would have been +well; Mrs. Hamilton would not have thought on the subject so seriously. +A mystery in her conduct had once before been so productive of anguish, +that Mrs. Hamilton could not think with her usual calmness and temper on +the circumstance. + +It was so long before Ellen regained her composure that traces of tears +were visible even when she joined the family at dinner, and were +remarked by her uncle, who jestingly demanded what could occasion signs +of grief at such an important era in her life. Vainly Ellen hoped her +aunt would spare her the pain of answering by even expressing her +displeasure at her resolution, but she waited in vain, and she was +compelled to own that the era of her life, to which her uncle so +playfully referred, was postponed by her own earnest desire till the +next season. + +Mr. Hamilton put down his knife and fork in unfeigned astonishment. +"Why, what is the meaning of this sudden change?" he exclaimed. "You +were not wont to be capricious, Ellen. Will your aunt explain this +marvellous mystery?" + +"I am sorry I cannot," Mrs. Hamilton replied, in a tone that plainly +betrayed to the quick ears of her husband that she was more than usually +disturbed. "I am not in Ellen's confidence; her resolution is as +extraordinary to me as to you, for she has given me no reason." Mr. +Hamilton said no more, but he looked vexed, and Ellen did not feel more +comfortable. He detained her as she was about to leave the room, and +briefly demanded in what manner she intended to employ the many hours, +which now that Miss Harcourt was away she would have to herself. A +crimson flush mounted to Ellen's temples as she spoke, a flush that, +combined with the hesitating tone in which she answered, "to read and +work," might well justify the sternness of tone and manner with which +her uncle replied. + +"Ellen, had you never deceived us, I might trust you, spite of that +flushed cheek and hesitating tone; as it is, your conduct the last two +years urges me to do so, notwithstanding appearances, and all I say is, +beware how you deceive me a second time." + +Ellen's cheek lost its colour, and became for the space of a minute pale +as death, so much so, that Mrs. Hamilton regretted her husband should +have spoken so severely. Rallying her energies, Ellen replied, in a +steady but very low voice-- + +"My conduct, uncle, during my aunt's and your absence from home, has +been and shall ever be open to the inspection of all your household. I +am too well aware that I am undeserving of your confidence, but I appeal +to Ellis, on whose fidelity I know you rely, to prove to you in this +case you suspect me unjustly." The last word was audible, but that was +all, and, deeply pained, Ellen retired to her own room, which she did +not quit, even to see her favourite cousin decked for the ball. Emmeline +sought her, however, and tried by kisses to recall the truant rose, the +banished smile, but Mrs. Hamilton did not come to wish her good night, +and Ellen's heart was heavy. + +Some few days passed, and Mrs. Hamilton accepted three several +invitations without again expressing her wishes, but though the subject +was not resumed, equal perplexity existed in the minds of both aunt and +niece. Ellen did not accuse Mrs. Hamilton of unkindness, but she could +not fail to perceive that she no longer retained her confidence, and +that knowledge painfully distressed the orphan's easily excited +feelings. Another circumstance gave additional pain; her strange and +apparently capricious behaviour had been casually mentioned to Herbert, +and he, aware that his advice was always acceptable to Ellen, ventured +to remonstrate with her, and playfully to reason her out of what he +termed her extraordinary fancy for seclusion. Some indefinable sensation +ever prevented Ellen from speaking or writing to Herbert as she would +have done to any other member of the family, but she answered him, +acknowledging she deserved his hinted reproach, but owning that she +could not change her conduct, even in compliance with his request; +nevertheless, it grieved her much to know that he, whose approbation +she unconsciously but ardently wished to gain, should believe her the +capricious, unaccountable being it was evident he did: still she +persevered. These, and whatever more she might have to endure, were but +petty trials, to which her secretly chastened mind might bend but should +not weakly bow. She knew, if her aunt were conscious of her attention, +much as perhaps she might approve of the motive, she would deem it a +needless sacrifice, and probably prohibit its continuance; or, if she +permitted and encouraged it, the merit of her action would no longer +exist, nor could she indeed, while in the enjoyment of praise, have +finished a task, commenced and carried on purely for the sake of duty, +and as an atonement for the past, by the sacrifice of inclination, make +peace with the gracious God she had offended. Petty trials were welcome +then, for if she met them with a Christian temper, a Christian spirit, +she might hope that, whatever she might endure, she was progressing in +His paths, "whose ways are pleasantness, and whose paths are peace;" +could she but remove the lingering displeasure and distrust of her aunt +and uncle, she would be quite happy. + +It so happened that Emmeline's next engagement was to the Opera, which +was always Ellen's greatest conquest of inclination. She had amused +herself by superintending her cousin's dressing, and a sigh so audibly +escaped, that Emmeline instantly exclaimed-- + +"Ellen, you know you would like to go with us. In the name of all that +is incomprehensible, why do you stay at home?" + +"Because, much as I own I should like to go with you, I like better to +stay at home." + +"You really are the spirit of contradiction, Ellen. What did you sigh +for?" + +"Not for the Opera, Emmeline." + +"Then why?" + +"Because I cannot bear to feel my aunt has lost all her confidence in +me." + +"You are marvellously silly, Ellen; mamma is just the same to you as +usual, I have observed no difference." + +"Dear Emmeline, coldness is not _seen_, it is _felt_, and as you have +been so happy as never to have felt it, you cannot understand what I +mean." + +"Nor do I ever wish to feel it. But do not look so sorrowful, dear +Ellen; mamma's coldness is an awful thing to encounter, I own." + +"If you have never felt it, how can you judge?" said a playful voice +beside them, for Emmeline had been too deeply engrossed in arranging and +disarranging a wreath of roses in her hair, and Ellen too much engaged +in her own thoughts, to notice the entrance of Mrs. Hamilton. + +"Is it possible you are not yet ready, Emmeline? what have you been +about?" + +"Teasing Ellen, mamma; besides Fanny was engaged, and I could not please +myself." + +"Or rather you were disinclined for exertion. I have been watching you +the last few moments, and you have played with that pretty wreath till +it is nearly spoiled." + +"I plead guilty, dear mamma, but let Fanny come, and I will be ready in +a second," answered Emmeline, looking archly and caressingly in her +mother's face. Mrs. Hamilton smiled, and turned as if to speak to her +niece, but Ellen was gone. She was sitting in her own room a few minutes +afterwards, endeavouring to collect her thoughts sufficiently to +understand the book of the new opera which her cousin had lent her, when +she was interrupted by a hand gently placed upon the leaves. + +"So coldness is felt, not seen, is it, my dear Ellen? well, then, let +that kiss banish it for ever," exclaimed Mrs. Hamilton, encircling the +delicate form of her niece with her arm. "I have been more distant and +unkind perhaps than was necessary, but your mysterious resolution +irritated me beyond forbearance, and I have been very unjust and very +cruel, have I not? will you forgive me?" + +Ellen looked up in her face, and, unable to control her feelings, threw +her arms around her and burst into tears. + +"Nay, dearest, do not let me leave you in tears. I am satisfied you have +some good reason for your conduct, though my usual penetration is +entirely at fault. Will you quite content me by looking steadily in my +face, and assuring me that your conscience never reproaches your +conduct. I shall not have one lingering doubt then." + +Ellen smiled through her tears, as she tried to obey, but her lip so +quivered as she answered, that Mrs. Hamilton laughingly added, "That +would never do in a court of justice, my silly little girl, no one would +pronounce you innocent if thus tearfully affirmed; but as you generally +compel me to regret severity, when I do venture to use it, I must be +content to let you follow your own inclinations this year at least. Next +season, I give you no such licences, _nolens volens_, as Percy would +say, I must take you out with me, you shall not hide yourself in +solitude; but I do not fancy your resolution will hold good, even the +remainder of this season," she added, smilingly. + +"Do not, pray do not try to turn me from it, my dear, kind aunt," said +Ellen, earnestly; "I do not deserve this indulgence from you, for I know +how much you dislike concealment, but indeed, indeed, you shall never +regret your kindness. I do not, I will not abuse it, it is only because, +because--" She hesitated. + +"Do not excite my curiosity too painfully, Ellen, in return for my +indulgence," said Mrs. Hamilton, sportively. + +"No, dear aunt, I only wish to finish a task I have set myself, and my +various avocations during the day prevent my having any time, unless I +take it from such amusements," said Ellen, blushing as she spoke; +"indeed, that is my real and only reason." + +Mrs. Hamilton fixed an anxious glance upon her, but though she really +felt satisfied at this avowal, the actual truth never entered her mind. + +"You have quite satisfied me, my dear girl! I will not ask more, and you +may stay at home as often as you please. Your uncle and I have both been +very unjust and very severe upon our little Ellen, but you have quite +disarmed us; so you shall neither feel nor fancy my coldness any more. +There is Emmeline calling as loudly for me as if I were after my time. +Good night, love. God bless you! do not sit up too late, and be as happy +as you can." + +"I am quite happy now," exclaimed Ellen, returning, with delighted +eagerness, Mrs. Hamilton's fond embrace, and she was happy. For a moment +she felt lonely, as the door closed on her aunt's retreating form, but +as she roused herself to seek her work, that feeling fled. When the +nature of her work was sufficiently simple to require but little +thought, Ellen was accustomed to improve herself by committing to memory +many parts of the Bible suited for prayer, confession, or praise, so +that her thoughts might riot wander during those solitary hours in the +paths of folly or of sin, but once centred on serious things, her mind +might thence become strengthened and her judgment ripened. + +These lonely hours did much towards the formation of the orphan's +character. Accustomed thus to commune with her Creator, to gather +strength in the solitude of her chamber, she was enabled, when her trial +came, to meet it with a spirit most acceptable to Him who had ordained +it. + + + + +CHAPTER XI. + + +Lord Malvern's family and Mr. Hamilton's were still in town, though the +younger members of each were longing for the fresh air of the country. + +One afternoon, hot and dusty from rapid riding, the young Earl St. Eval +hastily, and somewhat discomposedly, entered his sister Lady Gertrude's +private room. + +"Thank heaven, you are alone!" was his exclamation, as he entered; but +throwing himself moodily on a couch, he did not seem inclined to say +more. + +"What is the matter, dear Eugene? Something has disturbed you," said +Lady Gertrude, soothingly, and in a tone tending rather to allay his +irritation than express her own desire to know what had happened. + +"Something--yes, Gertrude, enough to bid me forswear England again, and +bury myself in a desert, where a sigh from your sex could never reach me +more." + +"Not even mine, Eugene?" exclaimed his sister, laying down her work, and +seating herself on a stool at his feet, while she looked up in his +excited features with an expression of fondness on her placid +countenance. "Would you indeed forbid my company, if I implored to share +your solitude?" + +"My sister, my own kind sister, would I, could I deprive myself of the +blessing, the comfort your presence ever brings?" replied St. Eval, +earnestly. "No, dearest Gertrude, I could not refuse you, whatever you +might ask." + +"Then tell me now what it is that has disturbed you thus. With what new +fancy are you tormenting yourself?" + +"Nay, this is no fancy, Gertrude. You are, you have been wrong from the +first, and I am too painfully right Caroline does not and never will +love me." + +Lady Gertrude started. + +"Have you been again rejected?" she demanded, a dark flush of indignant +pride suffusing her cheek. + +Lord St. Eval mournfully smiled. + +"You are as summary in your conclusions as you say I am sometimes. No, +Gertrude, I have not; I feel as if I could not undergo the torture I +once experienced in saying those words which I hoped would seal my +happiness." + +"Nay, then, I must say them for you," said Lady Gertrude, smiling. "I +have watched Caroline narrowly, and I feel so confident she loves you, +that I would, without the slightest doubt or fear, consign your +happiness, precious as it is to me, to her disposal." + +"Forbear, Gertrude, for pity!" exclaimed Lord St. Eval, starting up and +pacing the room. "You saw not what I saw last night, nor heard the cold, +malicious words warning me against her; that even when she had accepted, +she was false; or, if she were not false, that she still loved another. +I saw it in her varying cheek, her confused manner; I heard it in her +hurried accents, and this morning has confirmed all--all. Gertrude, I +ever told you, my lot was not happiness; that as the fate of some men is +all bright, so that of others is all gloom, and such is mine." + +"Eugene, how often must I entreat you not to speak thus. Man's happiness +or misery, in a great measure, depends upon himself. You have often said +that when with me, you reason more calmly than when you think alone; +only tell me coherently what has chanced, and all may not be so gloomy +as you believe." + +St. Eval suffered himself to be persuaded, and seating himself beside +his sister, he complied with her request. + +The fact was simply this. He had returned to England, at the entreaty of +his sister, determined to discover if indeed there existed any hope of +his at length obtaining Caroline's affections. Lady Gertrude's letter to +him purposely portrayed the many amiable qualities existing in +Caroline's character, and the general tenour of her words had led him to +resolve that if he could indeed make so favourable an impression on her +heart as to teach her to forget the past, he too would banish pride, and +secure his happiness, and he hoped hers, by a second offer of his hand. +Her conduct, guarded as it was, had unconsciously strengthened his +hopes, and the last few weeks he had relaxed so much in his reserve, as +to excite in the mind of Caroline the hope, almost the certainty, that +he no longer despised her, and created for himself many truly delightful +hours. It so happened that, on the evening to which he referred, +Caroline had gone to a large party, under the protection of the Countess +of Elmore, who at the entreaty of the lady of the house, had obtained +the permission of Mrs. Hamilton to introduce her. The young Earl had +devoted himself to her the greater part of the evening, to the +satisfaction of both, when his pleasure was suddenly and painfully +alloyed by her visible confusion at the unexpected entrance, and still +more unexpected salutation, of Lord Alphingham. Caroline had so seldom +met the Viscount during the season, that she was not yet enabled to +conquer her agitation whenever she beheld him. She ever dreaded his +addressing her; ever felt that somewhat lurked in his insinuating voice, +that would in the end lead to evil; besides which, her abhorrence +towards him whenever Percy's tale flashed across her mind, which it +never failed to do when he appeared, always prevented her retaining her +calmness undisturbed. Lord St. Eval had left England with the impression +that Alphingham was his favoured rival, and his imagination instantly +attributed Caroline's emotion at his entrance into a preference for the +Viscount. His earnest manner suddenly became chilled, his eloquence +checked. Intuitively Caroline penetrated his suspicions; the wish to +prove they were mistaken and unjust increased her confusion, and instead +of lessening, confirmed them. St. Eval said little more to her during +the evening; but he watched her. He saw Lord Alphingham whisperingly +address her. She appeared to become more painfully confused, and St. +Eval could scarcely restrain himself from hurrying from her sight for +ever; but he did restrain himself, only to be more tortured. + +The Viscount now believed the hour of his vengeance was at hand, when, +without the slightest exertion, he might disturb not only St. Eval's +peace, but that of Caroline. + +If St. Eval had but heard the few words he said to her, jealousy would +have been instantly banished, but for that he was not sufficiently near; +he could only mark the earnest and insinuating manner which the Viscount +knew so well how to assume, and notice her confusion, and the shade of +melancholy expressed on her features, which was in fact occasioned by +Lord St. Eval's sudden desertion, and her annoyance at the cause. His +quick imagination attributed all to the effect of Lord Alphingham's +tender words. The Viscount was well known, to him, and near the end of +the evening approached and remained in conversation by his side, spite +of the haughty reserve maintained by the young Earl, which said so +plainly, "your presence is unwelcome," that it would speedily have +dismissed any one less determined; but Lord Alphingham spoke admiringly +and enthusiastically of Caroline. Lord St. Eval listened, as if +fascinated by the very torture he endured. They were quite alone, and +after a few such observations, the Viscount lowered his voice to a +confidential tone, and said, triumphantly-- + +"Will you envy me, St. Eval, if I confess that I, more than any other +man, am privileged to speak in Miss Hamilton's praise, having once had +the honour of being her accepted lover, and had not cruel parents +interfered, might now have claimed that lovely creature as my own? but +still I do not despair, for the affections of a being so superior once +given to me, as they have been, I am convinced they will never be +another's. I am treating you as a friend, St. Eval, you will not betray +me?" + +"You may trust me, sir," replied the young Earl, coldly. "Your +confidence has been given unasked, but you need not fear its betrayal." + +"Thank you, my kind friend;" and the wily villain continued his +deceiving tale, with an eloquence we will not trouble ourselves to +repeat. It is enough to know its effect on St. Eval was to turn him from +the room, his sensitive feelings wrought almost to madness by malignant +bitterness. Lord Alphingham looked after him, and then turned his glance +on Caroline, and an acute physiognomist might easily have read his +inward thoughts--"My vengeance is complete." + +Alphingham had more than once mentioned the name of the Duchess of +Rothbury; but in such a manner, that though it sounded well enough in +his tale, yet when afterwards recalled by the young Earl, he could not +understand in what position she stood towards them. Lord Alphingham knew +well her Grace's character; he wished St. Eval to seek her, for he felt +assured what she would say would confirm his tale, and render the +barrier between him and Caroline more impassable. His plan succeeded +admirably: St. Eval gallopped off to Airslie early the next morning. The +Duchess welcomed him with the greatest cordiality, for he was a +favourite; but the moment he spoke of Caroline her manner changed. She +became as reserved as she had previously been warm; and when the young +Earl frankly asked her if the refusal of her parents had been the only +bar to her union with the Viscount, she referred him to Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton. That she was aware of something to Caroline's disadvantage +appeared very evident, and that she was not the favourite she had been +last year equally so. St. Eval left her more disturbed than ever, and it +was on returning from his long yet hurried ride he had sought his sister +in the mood we have described. + +Lady Gertrude listened with earnest attention. The tale startled her, +but she disliked the very sight of Lord Alphingham; she believed him to +be a bad, designing man. She felt convinced Caroline did love her +brother, much as appearances were against her; and both these feelings +urged her to sift the whole matter carefully, and not permit the +happiness of two individuals to be sacrificed to what might be but the +idle invention or exaggerations of a bad man. Her ready mind instantly +formed its plan, which calmly but earnestly she imparted to her brother, +and implored his consent to act upon it. Startled and disturbed, St. +Eval at first peremptorily refused; but his sisters's eloquence at +length succeeded. + +Early in the morning of the succeeding day Caroline Hamilton received +the following brief note: + +"Will you, my dear Caroline, receive me half an hour this afternoon? I +have something important to say; I have vanity enough to believe as it +concerns me it will interest you. We shall be more alone at your house +than mine, or I might ask you to come to me. + +"Yours affectionately, + +"GERTRUDE LYLE." + +Completely at a loss to understand the meaning of this little note, +Caroline merely wrote a line to say she should be quite at Lady +Gertrude's service at the appointed time; and so deeply was she +engrossed in the sad tenour of her own thoughts, that all curiosity as +to this important communication was dismissed. + +Three o'clock came and so did Lady Gertrude, whose first exclamation was +to notice Caroline's unusual paleness. + +"Do not heed my looks, dear Gertrude, I am perfectly well; and now that +you are before me, overwhelmed with curiosity as to your intelligence," +said Caroline, whose heavy eyes belied her assurance that she was quite +well. + +"Dearest Caroline," said Lady Gertrude, in a tone of feeling, "I am so +interested in your welfare, that I cannot bear to see the change so +evident in you; something has disturbed you. Show me you consider me +your friend, and tell me what it is." + +"Not to you, oh, not to you; I cannot, I dare not!" burst involuntarily +from the lips of the poor girl, in a tone of such deep distress, that +Lady Gertrude felt pained. "Gertrude, do not ask me; I own I am unhappy, +very, very unhappy, but I deserve to be so. Oh, I would give worlds that +I might speak it, and to you; but I cannot--will not! But do not refuse +me the confidence you offered," she added, again endeavouring to smile, +"I can sympathise in your happiness, though I refuse yours in my +sadness." + +"I am not quite sure whether I have sorrow or joy to impart," said Lady +Gertrude, still feelingly; for she guessed why Caroline believed she +dare not confide in her, and she hailed it as proof that she was right +in her surmise, that her brother's honourable love would not be again +rejected. + +"Eugene seems bent on again quitting England, and I fear if he do, he +will not return home again. On one little circumstance depends his final +determination; my persuasions to the contrary have entirely failed." + +The cheek of her companion blanched even paler than before, two or three +large tears gathered in her eyes, then slowly fell, one by one, upon her +tightly-clasped hands. + +"And if you have failed, who will succeed?" she asked, with a strong +effort. + +"The chosen one, whose power over the heart of St. Eval is even greater +than mine," said Lady Gertrude, steadily. "Ah, Caroline, when a man has +learned to love, the affection of a sister is of little weight." + +"He does love, then," thought Caroline, and her heart swelled even to +bursting, and he goes to seek her. "And will not the being Lord St. Eval +has honoured with his love second your efforts? if she be in England, +can she wish him to quit it?" she said aloud, in answer to her friend. + +"If she love him, she will not," said Lady Gertrude; "but St. Eval fears +to ask the question that decides his fate. Strange and wayward as he is, +he would rather create certain misery for himself, than undergo the +torture of being _again refused_." + +For a few minutes Caroline answered not; then, with a sudden effort, +rallying her energies, she exclaimed, as if in jest-- + +"Why, then, does he not make you his messenger; the affection you bear +for him would endow you with an eloquence, I doubt much whether his own +would surpass." + +She would have spoken more in the same strain, but the effort failed; +and turning away from Lady Gertrude's penetrating glance, which she felt +was fixed upon her, though she could not meet it, she burst into tears. + +More than ever convinced of the truth of her suspicions, Lady Gertrude's +noble mind found it impossible to continue this mode of discovery any +longer. She saw that Caroline imagined not she was the being alluded to; +that not even the phrase "again refused" had startled her into +consciousness, and she felt it was unkind to distress her more. + +"I knew it was false," she exclaimed, as the Viscount's tale flashed +across her mind; then, checking herself, she took Caroline's cold and +half-reluctant hand, and added, in a voice of extreme feeling, +"Caroline, dearest Caroline, forgive my having penetrated your secret; +fear me not, dear girl, I honour too much the feeling which dictates +your conduct. You have learned to love St. Eval; you have repented the +wilful and capricious treatment he once received from you. Deny it not, +nay, do not shrink from me, and think, because I appear so calm, I +cannot feel for those who are dear to me, and even sympathise in their +love. I do not, I will not condemn the past; I did once, I own, but +since I have known you, I have forgiven the mistaken wilfulness of a +misguided girl. You love him--confess that I am right, dearest." + +Caroline's face was concealed within her hand, and almost agonized was +its expression as she looked up. + +"Gertrude," she said, in a low, suffocated voice, "is it well, is it +kind in you thus to speak, to lead me to avow a love for one who, your +own words inform me, will soon be the husband of another?" + +"I said not of another, my dear girl; forgive me this stratagem to +penetrate your well-preserved secret. My brother's happiness is so dear +to me, I could not trust it to one of whose affection I was not certain. +I am not aware I said he would soon be the husband of another; since, if +he be again refused, that he never will be. Simply, then, for I have +been quite tormenting enough, Eugene has striven long with himself to +conquer his love, to be happy as your friend; associating with you as he +does with Emmeline, but he cannot. He still loves you, Caroline, as +devotedly, as faithfully--perhaps more so than when he first offered you +his hand; he dares not renew that offer himself, for he feels a second +refusal from your lips would wound him too deeply. Your voice may chain +him to England, an altered and a happier man, or send him from its +shores a misanthrope and wretched: it is for you to decide, Caroline, +dearest. Must I plead with that eloquence, which you said would surpass +even his own, or will the pleadings of your own kind heart suffice?" + +She paused, in evident emotion, for with a faint cry Caroline had thrown +herself on her neck, and buried her cheek upon her shoulder. Every limb +trembled with agitation; the ecstatic delight of that one moment--doubt +was, indeed, at an end. He loved her, and in spite of her faults he +would cherish her with tenderness; he had chosen her as his wife--chosen +her, though she had rejected, injured him, in preference to the very +many she felt so much more worthy than herself; but unalloyed happiness +was hers only for a few fleeting minutes, he knew not the extent of her +imprudence--how strangely and deeply she had been fascinated by the arts +of Lord Alphingham. Could he love, respect her as the partner of his +life, did he know that? and for a moment painfully did she long to +conceal it from him, to prevent his ever knowing it; but no, her innate +nobility and ingenuousness of character would not be thus trampled on. +She wept, and Lady Gertrude was startled, for those bitter tears were +not the signs of joy. + +"Do not condemn my weakness, dearest Gertrude," she said at length, +struggling for composure. "You do not know why I weep; you cannot guess +the cause of tears at such a moment. Yes, you are right; I do love your +brother with an affection equal to his own, but I thought it would never +pass my lips; for wilfully, blindly I had rejected the affection of his +good and noble heart; I had intentionally caused him pain, banished him +from his country and his friends, and my punishment was just. I thought +he would forget one so utterly unworthy, and the thought was agony. But, +oh, Gertrude, I shall never regain his love: when he knows all, he will +cease to trust me; his esteem I have lost for ever! Gertrude, bear with +me; you cannot know the wretchedness it is to feel he knows not all my +folly. The girl who could wilfully cast aside duty and obedience to a +parent, listen to forbidden vows, weakly place her honour in the power +of one against whom she had been warned--oh, Gertrude, Gertrude, when +St. Eval learns this tale, he will spurn me from his heart! and yet I +will not deceive him, he shall know all, and be free to act as he +will--his proposals shall be no tie." + +The flush of firm yet painful resolution dyed her cheek as she spoke, +and checked her tears. Alarmed as she was by the incoherence yet +connection of her words when attached to Lord Alphingham's hints, which +still lingered on her mind, yet the high-minded Lady Gertrude felt as if +Caroline's honourable determination had struck a new chord of sympathy +within her heart. Integrity itself was hers, and truth in others was +ever to her their most attractive quality. + +"St. Eval's doubts and fears have been already painfully aroused," she +said, gently; "an open explanation from you is more likely to make him +happy than produce the effect you so much, though so naturally, dread: +fear not to impart it. In the relation you now stand to each other, the +avowal of past errors will increase rather than lessen affection, by the +integrity it will display; but leave it till years have passed, and if, +instead of being known now, it is then discovered, then, indeed, might +you fear, with some show of justice, the loss of his esteem. Such will +not be now; but tell him yourself, dear Caroline, the truth or falsehood +of the scandalous tale he heard a night or two ago." + +"What did he hear? if you know, for pity's sake, do not conceal it from +me, dearest Gertrude!" entreated Caroline, almost gasping for breath; +and Lady Gertrude, without hesitation or abbreviation, related the whole +tale her brother had imparted to her, dwelling on the suffering he +endured, as he fancied Caroline's conduct confirmed the words he heard. + +"Then is it, indeed, time for me to speak, though my tale be one of +shame," she exclaimed, as Lady Gertrude paused, and indignation restored +her usual energy. "Never were attentions so revolting to me as were +those of Lord Alphingham that night. He knew he had no right to address +me, and therefore did he ever refrain when mamma was present. Gertrude, +solemnly, sacredly, I protest he has no hold on my affections--he dare +not say he has--nor ever again venture to demand my hand; it has been +irrevocably refused. Not only would my own will prevent my ever becoming +his, but I have--" she paused a moment, for Percy's fatal secret was on +the point of escaping from her lips, but checking herself, she added, "I +am not at liberty to say why, but an inseparable barrier is placed +between us. Listen to me, Gertrude, you will condemn me, be it so; but I +implore, I beseech you to believe me true." Then, without further +hesitation, Caroline briefly yet circumstantially related all those +events in her life with which our readers are so well acquainted. She +did not suppress one point, or endeavour in the least to excuse herself, +and Lady Gertrude, as she listened to that unvarnished tale of youthful +error, felt her heart glow more warmly towards her companion, and her +eye glisten in sympathy for the pain she felt Caroline was inflicting on +herself. Lady Gertrude could feel for others; twice had her carriage +been announced, but she heeded not the summons; a third came just as +Caroline had ceased to speak, and silently she rose to depart. She met +the imploring look of her young friend, and folding her to her heart, +she said, in a low and gentle voice-- + +"Ask not me, my dearest girl; St. Eval shall come and speak for +himself." She kissed her affectionately, and was gone. + +Caroline seated herself on a low couch, and closing her eyes on every +outward object, she gave herself up to thought. Might she indeed be +happy--were the errors of her former years so forgiven, that she would +indeed be blessed with the husband of her choice? Had St. Eval so +conquered pride as again to seek her love--would the blessing of her +parents now sanctify her marriage? it could not be, it was too much +bliss--happiness of which she was utterly unworthy. Time rolled by +unheeded in these meditations; she was quite unconscious that nearly +half an hour had elapsed since Lady Gertrude had left her; scarcely did +it appear five minutes, and yet it must have been more, for it was the +voice of St. Eval himself that roused her, that addressed her as his own +bride. St. Eval himself, who clasped her impetuously to his beating +heart, imprinted one long, lingering kiss upon her cheek and murmured +blessings on her head. He had waited for the return of his sister to the +carriage, in a state of impatience little to be envied, flung himself in +after her, and in a very brief space had heard and heard again every +particular of her interview with Caroline. His doubts wore satisfied, +not a lingering fear remained. + +"Gertrude told me, you said not to her the magic word that will seal my +happiness, though she wrung from you that precious secret of your love," +said the young Lord, after many very fond words had been exchanged +between them, and nearly an hour had passed away in that unrestrained +confidence; "nor have I heard it pass your lips. You have told me that +you love me, Caroline; will you not promise that but a very short time +shall pass, ere you will indeed be mine; that you will not sentence me +to a long probation ere that happy day is fixed?" + +"It is not in my power to answer you, St. Eval," and though her tone was +sportive, her words startled him. "I cannot even promise to be yours; my +fate is not in my own hands." + +"Caroline!" exclaimed the alarmed young man, "what can you mean?" + +"Simply, that I have vowed solemnly and sacredly never to many without +the consent and blessing of my parents. I have given you all I can, to +them I refer you for the rest." + +"Then I am satisfied," replied St. Eval, the flush of joyous excitement +staining his cheek, and rendering his expressive countenance more than +usually handsome, by the animation it produced. + +Mrs. Hamilton, with Emmeline and Ellen, had returned from their ride +rather later than usual, for they had gone to see a friend some few +miles out of town, and finding it near the hour of dinner, they had +dispersed to their dressing-rooms instead of entering the drawing-room +as usual. On inquiring for Caroline, if she had been out with Lady +Gertrude, or was still at home, she heard, to her extreme astonishment, +that Miss Hamilton had not gone out, but that Lord St. Eval had been +with her above an hour, nor had she left him to obey the summons of the +dressing-bell, as usual. A throb of pleasure shot through the heart of +Mrs. Hamilton, she scarcely knew wherefore, for it was no uncommon thing +for Lord St. Eval to spend an hour at her house, but it was that he +should thus have sought the society of Caroline alone. + +"Had either of her sons been with him?" she asked, and the answer was in +the negative. + +Martyn silently concluded her task, for she saw deep thought was on her +lady's brow, which she was too respectful to disturb; an earnest thought +it was, it might have been that silent prayer had mingled with it. Still +was that wish uppermost in Mrs. Hamilton's mind, that she might one day +see her Caroline the happy wife of Lord St. Eval; but when she entered +the drawing-room, words were not needed to explain the scene before her. +Mr. Hamilton had drawn his daughter to him, and was pressing the young +Earl's hand in his with a grasp that spoke volumes. + +"St. Eval, you have been too long the son of my affections, for one +instant to doubt my consent," Mrs. Hamilton heard her husband say, as +she entered; "it is yours, freely, gladly. Speak not of fortune, I would +give my child to you, had you but yourself to offer. But I am but a +secondary personage in this business," he added, playfully; "there is +the enchantress who holds the fate of my Caroline more firmly than I do. +Away with you, St. Eval, plead your cause to her." + +"Caroline, my own, does your happiness depend on my consent, or have you +done this merely for my sake?" murmured Mrs. Hamilton, as her child +clung in silence to her neck, and Lord St. Eval seized her hand and +pressed it to his lips, as if eloquent silence should tell his tale, +too, better than words. Mrs. Hamilton spoke in a voice so low, as to be +heard only by Caroline. + +"Speak to me, love; tell me that St. Eval will be the husband of your +free, unbiased choice, and my fondest blessing shall be yours." +Caroline's answer was inaudible to all, save to the ear of maternal +affection, to her mother it was enough. + +"Take her, St. Eval; my consent, my earnest wish to behold you united +has long been yours; may God in heaven bless you, my children, and make +you happy in each other!" + +Solemnly she spoke; her earnestness was affecting, it struck to their +hearts; for a moment there was silence, which Mrs. Hamilton was the +first to break. + +"Does my Caroline intend appearing at dinner in this costume?" she +asked, playfully, alluding to her daughter's morning dress. Startled and +blushing, Caroline, for the first time, perceived her mother was dressed +for dinner, and her father, determining to banish all appearance of +gravity, held up his watch, which pointed to some few minutes after the +usual dinner-hour. Glad to escape for a few minutes to the solitude of +her own room, Caroline hastily withdrew her hand from St. Eval's +detaining grasp, and smiling a brief farewell, brushed by Emmeline and +Ellen, who were that instant entering, without speaking indeed, but with +very evident marks of confusion, which Mr. Hamilton very quickly +explained to the extreme satisfaction of all parties. + +Caroline was not long before she returned. Happiness had caused her eyes +to sparkle with a radiance her parents had not seen for many a long day; +and they felt as they gazed on her, now indeed was she worthy to be the +honoured wife of St. Eval, and their thoughts were raised in silent +unison to heaven for the blessing thus vouchsafed to them. And scarcely +could Mr. Hamilton restrain the emotion which swelled his bosom, as he +thought, had it not been for the untiring care, the bright example of +that mother, his child, instead of being a happy bride, might now have +been--he shuddered as he thought, and the inward words were checked, he +could not give them vent, they were hidden in the silent recesses of his +own breast; and did not that same thought dwell in the mind of his wife, +when she contrasted the present with the past? It did, but she looked +not on herself as the cause of her child's escape from wretchedness and +sin. Her efforts she knew would have been as naught, without the +blessing of Him whose aid she had ever sought; and if indeed the thought +of her had arrested Caroline on the brink of ruin, it was His work, and +Him alone she praised. She looked on the glowing countenance of her +daughter; she marked the modest gentleness of her demeanour, the +retiring dignity with which she checked the effusions of her own fond +affection, and received the attentions of her devoted lover, and she +felt sure those few moments of solitude had been passed in thanksgiving +and prayer to Him who had pardoned the errors of the past, and granted +such unlooked-for joy. And she guessed aright, for the mind of Caroline +had not been entirely engrossed by the bright and glowing visions which +anticipation in such a moment of our lives is apt to place before us. +Her thoughts during the last year had been secretly under the guidance +of the most rigid self-control, and thus permitted her to raise them +from the happiness of earth to blessedness yet more exalted. Oh! who can +say that religion is the heavy chain that fetters us to gloom and +everlasting sadness; that in chastening the pleasures of earth, it +offers no substantial good in return? True piety, open the heart by its +sweet, refreshing influence, causes us to enjoy every earthly blessing +with a zest the heart in which the love of God is not an inmate will +seek in vain to know. It is piety that strengthens, purifies affection. +Piety, that looks on happiness vouch us here, as harbingers of a state +where felicity will be eternal. Piety that, in lifting up the grateful +soul to God, heightens our joys, and renders that pure and lasting +which would otherwise be evanescent and fleeting. Piety, whose soft and +mildly-burning torch continues to enlighten life, long, long after the +lustre of worldly pleasures has passed away. It was this blessed +feeling, kindled in earliest infancy by the fostering hand of parental +love, which now characterised and composed every emotion of Caroline's +swelling bosom, which bade her feel that this indeed was happiness. With +blushing modesty she received the eagerly-offered congratulations of her +affectionate family; the delighted embrace which Percy in the enthusiasm +of his joy found himself compelled to give her. + +"Now, indeed, may I hope the past will never again cross my mind to +torment me," he whispered to his sister, and wrung St. Eval's hand with +a violence that forced that young man laughingly to cry for mercy. There +had been a shade of unusual gloom shrouding the open countenance and +usually frank demeanour of Percy since his return from Oxford, for which +his parents and sisters could not account, but as he seemed to shrink +from all observation on the subject, they did not ask the cause; but +this unexpected happiness seemed to make him for a few following days as +usual the gayest, merriest member of his amiable family. + +Often in these days of happiness did Caroline think on the qualities +which Lady Gertrude had once said should adorn the wife of her brother. +Faults he could pardon, if they were redeemed by affection, and +ingenuousness unsullied by the slightest artifice. Affection she well +knew she possessed; but she also knew that, to be as unreserved as would +form the happiness of her husband, she must effectually banish that +pride, which she knew still lurked within. Often would she converse on +these things when alone with her mother, and implore her advice as to +the best method of securing not only the love but the esteem of St. +Eval. "Gertrude was quite right in the estimate of her brother's +character," Mrs. Hamilton would at such times observe, her fond heart +fully repaid for past anxiety and disappointment by this confidence in +her child; "and so too are you, dearest, in your idea that not the +faintest sign of pride must mark your intercourse with him. Perhaps he +is more reserved than proud; indeed, in his case, I cannot call it +pride, but it is that kind of reserve which would jar most painfully did +it come in contact with anything resembling pride. Had you grown up such +as you were in childhood, your union with St. Eval, much as you might +think you loved each other, would not have been productive of lasting +happiness to either. Let him see dependence is not merely a profession +which your every action would contradict; from independence spring so +many evils, that I feel sure you will avoid it. It is, I regret to say, +a prevailing error in those circles wherein your rank will entitle you +to mingle; an error that must ever endanger conjugal happiness. When a +woman marries, the world, except as the arbiter of propriety, ought to +be forgotten; all her endeavours to please, to soothe, to cheer, must +still be exerted even more than before marriage, but exerted only for +her husband; not one little pleasing art, not one accomplishment should +be given up, but used as affection dictates, to enhance her value in the +eyes of him whose felicity it should be her principal aim to increase. +You will be placed in an exalted station in the opinion of the world, my +beloved child, a station of temptation, flattery, danger, more so than +has over yet been yours; but I do not tremble now as I did, too +forebodingly, when the world was first opened to your view. You have +learned to mistrust your own strength, to seek it where alone it can be +found, to examine your every action by the Word of God, and with these +feelings you are safe. My Caroline will not fail in duty to her husband +or herself." + +"Nor to you, my mother, my devoted mother!" exclaimed Caroline, as she +fondly kissed her. "It is to you, next to my God, I owe this blessing; +and oh, if it be my lot to be a mother, may I be to my children, as far, +at least, as one so much inferior in piety and virtue can be, what you +have been to me. Oh, might I but resemble you, as my full heart has so +lately longed, St. Eval might be happy!" + +At the earnest entreaty of St. Eval and Caroline, both families +consented that the ceremonial of their marriage should take place in the +same venerable church where the first childish prayers of Caroline had +ascended from a house of God, and the service be performed by the +revered and pious rector of Oakwood, the clergyman who, from her +earliest childhood, she had been taught to respect and love, as the +humble representative of Him whose truths he so ably taught. Caroline +had consented to name the second week of September as the period of her +espousals. The few chosen friends of both families who were to be +invited to the ceremony were to assemble in the hospitable halls of +Oakwood, and earnestly did every member of Mr. Hamilton's family hope +that the long-absent sailor, Edward Fortescue, who was soon expected +home, might arrive in time to be present at the marriage of his cousin. +How the young heart of his orphan sister fluttered with delight at the +thought of beholding him again we will not attempt to describe, but it +was shared with almost equal warmth by Mrs. Hamilton, whose desire was +so great that her gallant nephew, the brave preserver of her husband, +might be present at the approaching joyful event, that she laughingly +told Ellen she certainly would postpone the ceremony till Edward +arrived, whatever opposition she might have to encounter. + +The engagement of the Eight Honourable Earl St. Eval, the heir to the +marquisate of Malvern, embracing such rich possessions, with a plain +gentleman's daughter was a matter of mingled wonder, scorn, admiration, +and applause to the fashionable world; but these opinions and emotions +were little regarded, save as a matter of continual jest to Percy, who +amused himself by collecting all the reports he could, and repeating +them at home, warning them against a marriage which caused such an +universal sensation. It might be supposed this sensation would have been +felt in various ways in the family of Montrose Grahame; but it happened +that Annie was so engrossed with her own plans, her mind so occupied by +one interesting subject, that she and Lord Alphingham had but little +time to think of anything but each other. Annoyed they were indeed, for +all their designs were foiled; St. Eval and Caroline were happy, spite +of their efforts to the contrary. Lady Helen was really so delighted at +the prospects of Caroline, who had ever been a favourite with her, that +she actually exerted herself so much as to call in person to offer her +best wishes, and promise that she would spend the whole winter at +Moorlands, to be present at the ceremony. Lilla was overjoyed, for Mrs. +Hamilton promised she should be among the guests at Oakwood. Mr. +Grahame, whose friendship with Mr. Hamilton would have and did render +him most interested in the event, was at Paris when their engagement was +first published, but his warmly-written letters to his friend proclaimed +his intention of very soon returning to England, but till then +entreating the young couple to accept his sincerest prayers and best +wishes for their happiness, and warmly congratulated Mr. and Mrs. +Hamilton on the prospects of their child; but there was a sadness +pervading his letters which gave them pain to note, for they knew too +well the cause. + +The letters of Mary Greville, too, added pleasure to the betrothed. +Informed by Herbert of both past and present events, St. Eval's long +affection for Caroline, which he playfully hoped would solve the mystery +of his not gratifying her wishes, and falling in love with Miss Manvers, +Mary wrote with equal sportiveness, that she was quite satisfied with +his choice, and pleased that his residence at Lago Guardia had enabled +her to become so well acquainted with one about to be so nearly +connected with her Herbert. + +About a week or fortnight before Mr. Hamilton's intended return to +Oakwood, Percy one morning received a letter which appeared to produce +excessive agitation. But as he evidently did not wish it remarked, no +notice was taken, except by Herbert, to whom alone he had shown the +letter, and who seemed equally interested, though not so much agitated +by its contents. To the anxious inquiries of his parents, if individual +embarrassment or distress occasioned Percy's uneasiness, Herbert +answered readily in the negative; that the letter informed them of the +death of an unfortunate individual in whose fate both he and Percy had +been most deeply interested. Trusting in the well-known integrity of +their sons, Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton inquired no farther, and dismissed the +subject; but Percy did not rouse himself from his gloomy abstraction +till startled by intelligence, which regard for his father's friend +Grahame could not permit him to hear with calmness. + +Two mornings after the receipt of that letter, as the family, which the +addition of St. Eval, were sitting together after breakfast, ere they +separated to the various avocations of the day, Lord Henry D'Este +bustled in with a countenance expressive of something extraordinary. + +"Have you heard the news?" was his first eager exclamation. + +"If we had, it would be no news," replied Emmeline, archly; "but we have +heard nothing. Papa has something else to do than to seek out news for +me, ditto the Right Honourable Lord St. Eval. Percy has been suddenly +converted into the spirit of gloom, and to Herbert it is in vain to look +for gossip, so, for pity's sake, satisfy my curiosity." + +"Perhaps you will say I have been exciting it unnecessarily," he +answered. "An elopement is too common a thing now to cause much +astonishment." + +"It depends on the parties," observed Mr. Hamilton. "Who are they?" + +"Those, or rather one of them, I fear, for her father's sake, in whom +you will be too deeply interested,--Lord Alphingham and Miss Grahame." + +"Annie!" burst from Caroline's lips, in an accent of distress that +struck all, and fell somewhat, painfully on Lord St. Eval's ear, when +starting from the seat she had occupied near him, she sprung forward, +and wildly continued, "when--when? Lord Henry, for pity's sake, tell me! +is there no time? Can they not be overtaken? When did they go?" + +Bewildered at the wild earnestness of her manner, at the muttered +execration of Percy, Lord Henry was for a moment silent; but, on the +repeated entreaty of Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, he said that the particulars +were not yet all known, except that she had been staying with her +friend, that same lady of rank in whose family Miss Malison had been +installed; that from her house the elopement had taken place, when, he +did not exactly know, the report had only that morning gained credit. +Lady Helen was not in the least aware of what had passed, nor would she, +in all probability, till Annie's own letter announced it, as she turned +a careless ear to all that her friends had hinted. He greatly feared, +however, that it was useless to think of overtaking them; they had been +seen and recognised, on the road between York and Berwick, by a friend +of his, three days previous. He had at first regarded his friend's +letter as a mere jest, but finding he had written the same to many +others, and that the report was gaining ground, he felt sufficient +interest in Mr. Grahame to discover the truth, that he might be informed +of it, and take measures accordingly, and as Grahame was from home, he +thought the best thing he could do was to tell the whole story to Mr. +Hamilton. + +"And is there indeed no hope? Can they not be overtaken?" again demanded +Caroline, almost choked with an agitation for which even her parents +could not account. + +Lord Henry did not think there was the slightest possibility, and +unable to control her emotion, for she could not forget the long years +she had regarded Annie as her friend, the favourite companion of her +childhood, Caroline sunk, pale as death, on the nearest seat. Her mother +and St. Eval approached her in some alarm, the former to demand the +cause of this agitation, and implore her to be calm; the latter to +connect, with a swelling heart and trembling frame, this deep emotion +with the words of Lord Alphingham, which he vainly endeavoured to +forget; but Percy alone had power to restore her to any degree of +composure, taking her trembling hand in his, he whispered a few words, +and their effect was instantaneous. + +"Thank God, she will be at least his wife!" escaped Caroline's quivering +lips, and then burst into tears. + +"Mother, do not ask more now. St. Eval, do not doubt my sister, her +agitation arose for Miss Grahame alone, not for the villain, the +cold-hearted villain, Alphingham!" exclaimed Percy, in a low but +impressive voice, as he alternately addressed his mother and the Earl, +and then, as if fearing their further questions, he hastily turned away +to join his father in demanding every possible information from Lord +Henry; and perceiving that Caroline was becoming calm, and also that St. +Eval looked somewhat disturbed, Mrs. Hamilton followed her son to the +other end of the room. Still St. Eval spoke not, and Caroline, as she +read the reproach, the doubt expressed upon his features, for a moment +felt her natural pride swelling high within her, that he could for one +minute permit a doubt of her truth to enter his mind; but her +resolution, her mother's advice, the observation of Lady Gertrude, all +rose to combat with returning pride, and they conquered. + +"Eugene, dearest Eugene," she said, as she extended her hand towards +him, "you have, indeed, every reason to look disturbed. In my deep +anxiety for her whom I so long loved as my friend, I forgot that my +agitation might indeed confirm the unworthy tale you heard. Forgive me, +Eugene; I know that I have pained you, but, indeed, I meant it not. If +Lord Alphingham did cross my mind, it was in detestation, in abhorrence, +that he should thus have acted. I trembled for Annie, for her alone, for +the fearful fate that, when Lord Henry first spoke, I believed must be +her lot. Were I at liberty to disclose all, you would not wonder such +should have been my feelings, Eugene," she added, in an accent of gentle +reproach. "Must I indeed solemnly and sacredly assure you, that my +agitation was occasioned by no lingering affection for Lord Alphingham? +will nothing else satisfy you? Is it kind, is it generous thus to doubt +me?" + +Softened at once, ashamed of his own jealous tendency, the young Earl +could only implore her forgiveness, assure her he had not the faintest +doubt remaining; and suggesting, air would revive her sooner than +anything, he drew her to the open window of the adjoining room, which +looked out on the little garden, and there they remained in apparently +earnest conversation, till Caroline, to her extreme astonishment, was +summoned by her cousin to luncheon, and Lord St. Eval suddenly +discovered he had permitted the whole morning to slip away in idleness, +when he imagined he had so very much to do. + +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton were more grieved than surprised at the +intelligence they had heard; but in what manner to act, what measures to +take they knew not. Grahame was expected to arrive in England on the +morrow or the next day at the farthest, and his agony they dreaded to +witness; they feared lest reports should reach him ere he was in any way +prepared, and Mr. Hamilton determined on travelling instantly to Dover, +that he might be there ready to receive him, and console to the best of +his ability this mistaken but truly affectionate father. Percy, rousing +himself, entered with activity into all his father's plans; but Mrs. +Hamilton fancied that he too had some plan to follow up, which his +absence two or three days from home confirmed. Nor was it idle sympathy +she felt; that same day she sought the residence of Lady Helen. + +Scarcely ever did she enter that house without being struck by the +melancholy pervading it. Wrapped in her own pleasures, her own desires +and amusements, Annie never cast one thought on her mother, whose +declining health it would have been her duty to tend and soothe; indeed +she scarcely ever entered her room, and believing her parent's ailments +were all fancy, made it a rule to take no notice of them. Cecil liked +not gloom and quiet, and his fashionable cousins occupied almost all his +time. He could not comprehend, much less return the deep affection his +mother felt for him; and Lilla, whose naturally warm heart and right +principles would have made her an affectionate attendant on her mother's +couch, was seldom at home to perform her part. But already had Lady +Helen felt the difference a year's residence with Mrs. Douglas had made +in her younger girl; already her indolent nature felt the comfort of her +presence, and bitterly regretted when her short vacations were at an +end, for then she was indeed alone. + +On being admitted, Mrs. Hamilton fancied somewhat eagerly, the first +person she encountered at Lady Helen's was her young friend, clad, it +seemed, for walking, with traces of anxiety and sorrow written on her +countenance. + +"The very person I was about to seek," she exclaimed, in a voice of +intense relief, springing down the stairs to reach her friend. "Dearest +Mrs. Hamilton, mamma--Annie--" The words choked her, and she burst into +tears. + +"Compose yourself, love, I know all; only tell me how your mother bears +the shock," whispered Mrs. Hamilton, instantly penetrating at once the +truth, that either the report had reached Lady Helen, or she had +received the intelligence direct from her daughter; and anxious to +escape the curious eyes of the domestics, who were in the hall, she +hastily yet kindly drew the weeping Lilla to the nearest parlour, and, +closing the door, succeeded in hearing all she desired. Lilla said, her +mother, only an hour before, had received a letter from Annie, briefly +announcing her marriage, and informing her they intended very shortly to +embark for the Netherlands from Leith, thence to make a tour in Germany +and Italy, which would prevent their returning to England for some time, +when she hoped all present irritation at her conduct would have +subsided; that her father's severity had tended to this step. Had he +been kind, and like other fathers, she would have sacrificed her own +desires, conscious that his reason for prohibiting her union with +Alphingham was good, however it might be secret; but when from her +childhood her every wish had been unreasonably thwarted, she was +compelled to choose in such a case for herself. She should be sorry to +live in enmity with her father, but even if she did, she never could +regret the step she had taken. To her mother she wrote as if assured of +her forgiveness, or rather her continued favour; forgiveness she did not +seem to think it at all necessary to ask, saying, she was sure her kind +and indulgent mother would not regret her union with Lord Alphingham, +when she solemnly declared it had made her happier than she had ever +been before. Such Lilla said were the contents of her letter; but the +warm-hearted girl could not refer without indignation to the utter want +of affection which breathed throughout. Her mother, Lilla continued to +say, had been in a most alarming state from the time she received the +letter, but she fancied occasioned more by the dread of what her father +would say on his return, than from Annie's conduct. + +When Mrs. Hamilton saw Lady Helen, she felt that Lilla was right. The +unhappy mother reproached her own carelessness, indolence, and Annie's +ingratitude, but it was evident the dread of her husband was uppermost +in her mind--a dread which made her so extremely ill, from a succession +of violent and uncontrolled hysterics, that Mrs. Hamilton did not leave +her the whole of that day; nor would she permit the unhappy father to +enter his wife's apartment on his return, till she had exacted from him +a promise to forbear all reproaches towards his suffering wife, all +allusions to the past. + +With the stern brevity of the injured, Grahame addressed his disobedient +child. His forgiveness and his blessing he sent, though he said she had +asked for neither; that he bore no enmity to her, he wrote; his home and +his heart were ever open to receive her, should she again require the +protection of the one, the affection of the other. She had chosen for +herself; linked her fate with one against whom many tongues had spoken, +and he could only pray that her present happiness might never change. +Lord Alphingham he did not name. Lady Helen's letter was a curious +mixture of reproach and affection, complaint and congratulation; and +Annie might have found it difficult to discover in what manner she was +affected towards the Viscount, or with regard to the elopement itself. +Perhaps of all the letters she received from home, Lilla's was the most +irritating to her, for it was written in all the bitter indignation, the +unchecked reproaches of a young and ardent spirit, in whose eyes the +heartlessness of her letter was inexcusable, and she wrote as she +thought. Annie, as might have been expected, deigned her no reply. A few +languidly written letters her mother received from her during her tour; +but the chief of her correspondence was reserved for Miss Malison and +the lady who had so ably assisted their secret plans. The friendly +influence of Mr. Hamilton succeeded, after a few days, in restoring his +friend to comparative outward composure, although the wound within, he +too sadly felt, was beyond his power to heal. + +A few days passed in peace. Mrs. Hamilton and her family were +anticipating with pleasure the quiet happiness of Oakwood, and the event +then to take place. Scarcely a week intervened before their departure, +when they were one afternoon startled by the appearance of Grahame, +whose countenance bore the pallid hue of death, and every action denoted +the most fearful agitation. Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton, Caroline and St. +Eval, were alone present, and they gazed on him in unfeigned alarm. + +"Hamilton, I start for Brussels to-night," was his salutation, as he +entered. + +"Brussels!" repeated Mr. Hamilton. "Grahame, you are beside yourself. +What affairs can call you to Brussels so suddenly?" + +"Affairs--business; aye, of such weight, I cannot rest till they are +attended to. Hamilton, you are astonished; you think me mad; oh, would +to God I were!" and striking his forehead with his clenched hand, he +paced the room in agony. + +Ere his friend could approach or address him, he suddenly paused before +Caroline, who was watching him in alarm and commiseration, and grasping +her arm, with a pressure that pained her, he said, in a voice which +blanched her cheek with horror-- + +"Hamilton, look on this girl, and, as you love me, answer me. Could you +be a Roman father, did you see her dishonoured,--the victim, the wilful +victim of a base, a treacherous, miserable villain?--say, could you wash +away the blackening stain with blood--with her blood--or his, or both? +Speak to me--counsel me. My child, my child!" he groaned aloud. + +"Grahame, you are ill; my dear friend, you know not what you say," +exclaimed Mr. Hamilton, terrified both at his wildness and his words. +"Come with me till this strange mood has passed; I entreat it as a +favour--come." + +"Passed--till this mood has passed! Hamilton, it will never pass till +the grave has closed over Annie and myself. Oh, Hamilton, my friend, I +had reconciled myself to this marriage; taught myself to believe that, +as his wife, she might be happy; and--oh, God! can I say the words?--she +is not his wife--he is already married." His trembling limbs refused +support, and he sunk, overcome by his emotion, on a chair. Without a +minute's pause, a moment's hesitation, and ere her father could find +words to reply, Caroline sprung forward, and kneeling beside the +wretched father, she seized his hand-- + +"Be calm, be comforted, dearest Mr. Grahame," she exclaimed, in a voice +that caused him to gaze at her with astonishment. "It is a mistaken tale +you have heard; a cruel falsehood, to disturb your peace. Lord +Alphingham was married, but Annie is now his lawful wedded wife; the +partner of his youth, the devoted woman whom for eight years he +deserted, is no more. She died the day preceding that which united Lord +Alphingham to your child. I speak truth, Mr. Grahame; solemnly, +sacredly, I affirm it. Percy will tell you more; I was pledged to +secrecy. On her deathbed she demanded a solemn promise from all who knew +her tale, never to divulge it, lest it should prove to the discredit of +her cruel husband, whom her last accents blessed. I promised Percy it +should be sacred, unless an emergency demanded it. Be comforted, Mr. +Grahame, indeed, I speak the truth. Lord Alphingham was free, restrained +by no tie, when he was united to your child." Rapidly, hurriedly, she +had spoken, for she trembled at the wild gaze Grahame had fixed upon +her. Caroline's voice rung clear and distinct upon his ear, and every +word brought comfort, still he spoke not; but when she ceased, when +slowly, more impressively her last words were spoken, he uttered a faint +cry, and folding her slight form convulsively to his heart, sobbed like +an infant on her shoulder. Thoughts unutterable thronged the minds of +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton as they too listened with fascinated eagerness to +Caroline's words; thoughts, not only of the present but the past, rushed +quickly to their minds. A year previous Lord Alphingham's wife still +lived; though he, villain as he was, had heeded not the sacred tie. Well +could they enter into the blessed relief her words had brought to the +distracted father. Mr. Hamilton permitted some minutes to elapse in +silence, and then gently withdrawing Caroline from Grahame's still +convulsive hold, said a few words, in a voice which, though low, +expressed that kindly sympathy which seldom fails to reach the inmost +soul; and finally succeeded in passing his arm through that of his +friend, and leading him to an adjoining room, where, after a time, +Grahame conquered his agitation sufficiently to give a connected account +of the means through which he had learned the information which had so +distracted him. Caroline's words and the influence of his friend +restored him to comparative composure; but all was not at peace within +until Percy had obeyed the summons of his father, and the information of +his sister was confirmed in every point by him. He related the tale of +Mrs. Amesfort, with which our readers are already well acquainted, with +the addition of her death, of which the letter he received a few days +previous had informed him. Many affecting interviews he had had with +her, in which she spoke, of her husband, her mother, her child, so +fondly, that the tears often started to the eyes of Percy, though her +own were dry. In parting from him, she had again implored him not to +divulge her secret, unless the interest of her child demanded it, or he +saw urgent occasion. + +"Let not the breath of calumny sully the name of my child," she said, +grasping his hand with a painful effort. "Let her not be looked on as a +child of shame, when her birth is as pure and noble as any in the land. +If her birth be questioned, let the whole world know she is the daughter +of Lord Alphingham. In my mother's care is the certificate of my +marriage, also of the christening of my Agnes. But if nothing be +demanded, if her lot be happy, it is better both for father and daughter +that they remain unknown to each other." + +Percy had made the solemn promise she demanded, but the remembrance of +her pale features, her drooping form, had haunted him on his return +home, and caused that deep gloom his family had remarked. It was more +than a week after Mrs. Amesfort's death, before her afflicted mother +could write the tidings to the young man, who, on hearing of Annie's +conduct, had instantly and actively set about obtaining the exact date +of the unfortunate lady's death, and also that of the Viscount's hasty +marriage in Scotland. The result was most satisfactory; rather more than +a week had elapsed between the two events, and his marriage with Annie +was, consequently, sacred and binding. Percy also said, Mrs. Morley had +mentioned her intention of instantly returning to Ireland with the +little Agnes, from whom she fervently prayed she might never be +compelled to part. + +Believed, and truly thankful, Grahame consulted with his friends on the +best plan to pursue to silence the rumours which, having overheard in a +public coffeehouse, would, he had no doubt, be immediately circulated +over the town. Mrs. Morley said, she had written to inform Lord +Alphingham of the death of his broken-hearted wife, enclosing one from +the ill-fated Agnes herself. He was, therefore, perfectly aware of the +validity of his second marriage, for Percy had inquired and found the +letter had been forwarded; there was no need of communication with him +on that point. Grahame's first care was to travel to Scotland, and +obtain the registry of their marriage; his next, to proceed to Brussels, +with Mr. Hamilton, and coolly and decisively inform Lord Alphingham +that, unless the ceremony was publicly solemnized a second time, in his +presence, and before proper witnesses, other proceedings would be +entered upon against him. Astonished and somewhat alarmed as Lord and +Lady Alphingham were at his unexpected appearance, the former had too +many sins on his conscience to submit to a public _expose_, which he +might justly fear was intended in this threat, and, with great apparent +willingness, he consented. The ceremony was again performed; Grahame +possessed himself of the certificate, and left Brussels, with the +half-formed resolution that, while Lord Alphingham lived, he would never +see his child again. The death of the Right Honourable Viscountess +Alphingham, and the subsequent marriage in Scotland of the Eight +Honourable Lord Viscount Alphingham with Miss Grahame, appeared in all +the newspapers. The splendour of the second solemnization of their +nuptials in Brussels was the next theme of wonder and gossip, and by the +time that subject was exhausted, London had become deserted, and Lord +and Lady Alphingham might probably have returned to the metropolis +without question or remark; but such was not Lord Alphingham's +intention. He feared that probably were his history publicly known he +might be shunned for the deceit he had displayed; and he easily obtained +Annie's glad consent to fix their residence for a few years in Paris. +Irritated as in all probability he was, when he found himself again +fettered, yet he so ably concealed this irritation, that his wife +suspected it not, and for a time she was happy. + +As Lord and Lady Alphingham are no longer concerned in our tale, having +nothing more in common with those in whom, we trust, our readers are +much more interested, we may here formally dismiss them in a few words. +They lived, but if true happiness dwells only with the virtuous and +good, with the upright and the noble, it gilded not their lot; but if +those who are well acquainted with the morality of the higher classes of +the French capital can pronounce that it dwells there, then, indeed, +might they be said to possess it, for such was their lives. They +returned not again to England, but lived in France and Italy, +alternately. Alphingham, callous to every better and softer feeling, +might have been happy, but not such was the fate of Annie. Bitterly, ere +she died, did she regret her folly and disobedience; remorse was +sometimes busy within, though no actual guilt dimmed her career: she +drowned the voice of conscience in the vortex of frivolity and fashion. +But the love she bore for Alphingham was the instrument of retribution, +her husband neglected, despised, and frequently deserted her. Let no +woman unite herself with sin, in the vain hope of transforming it to +virtue. Such thoughts had not, indeed, been Annie's, when wilfully she +sought her fate. She knew not the man she had chosen for her husband; +she disregarded the warnings she had heard. Fatal delusion! she found, +too late, the fate her will had woven was formed of knotty threads, the +path that she had sought beset with thorns, from which she could not +break. No children blessed her lot, and it was better thus--for they +would have found but little happiness. The fate of Lord Alphingham's +child, the little Agnes, was truly happy in her own innocence; she lived +on for many years in ignorance of her real rank and the title of her +father, under the careful guidance of that relative to whom her mother's +last words had tenderly consigned her. + +Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton remained but little longer in town; Caroline's +_trousseau_ was quite completed, for but very few weeks now intervened +ere her marriage. Lady Gertrude had devoted herself to the young Earl, +and remained with him superintending the improvements and embellishments +of his beautiful estate, Castle Terryn, in the vicinity of the Tamar, on +the Cornwall side, which was being prepared with the greatest taste and +splendour. Lady Gertrude was to remain with her brother till the week +previous to the wedding, when she joined her family at Oakwood, where +they had been staying since their departure from London, at the earnest +persuasions of both Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton. Seldom had the banks of the +placid Dart been so gay as they were on this occasion; the beautiful +villas scattered around were all taken by the friends of the parties +about to be so nearly connected. Rejoicings were not only confined to +the higher class; the poor, for many miles round, hailed the expected +marriage of Miss Hamilton as an occasion of peculiar and individual +felicity. Blessings on her lot, prayers for her welfare, that Lord St. +Eval might prove himself worthy of her, were murmured in many a rustic +cot, and every one was employed in earnest thought as to the best, the +most respectful mode of testifying their humble sympathy in the +happiness of their benefactors. Such were the feelings with which high +and low regarded the prosperity of the good. + + +END OF VOL. I. + + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Mother's Recompense, Volume I. +by Grace Aguilar + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE MOTHER'S RECOMPENSE, VOLUME I. *** + +***** This file should be named 12361.txt or 12361.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/1/2/3/6/12361/ + +Produced by Charles Franks and the Distributed Proofreaders Team + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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