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+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 11351 ***
+
+[Illustration: "He's a hero born and bred,
+but it hasn't swelled his head."]
+
+
+
+
+Cape Cod Ballads
+
+and Other Verse
+
+By
+
+Joseph C. Lincoln
+
+_With Drawings by Edward W. Kemble_
+
+
+1902
+
+
+
+
+To My Wife
+
+This book is affectionately dedicated
+
+
+
+
+Preface
+
+
+A friend has objected to the title of this book
+on the ground that, as many of the characters
+and scenes described are to be found in almost
+any coast village of the United States, the title might,
+with equal fitness, be "New Jersey Ballads," or "Long
+Island Ballads," or something similar.
+
+The answer to this is, simply, that while "School-committee
+Men" and "Village Oracles" are, doubtless,
+pretty much alike throughout Yankeedom, the
+particular specimens here dealt with were individuals
+whom the author knew in his boyhood "down on the
+Cape." So, "Cape Cod Ballads" it is.
+
+The verses in this collection originally appeared in
+_Harper's Weekly, The Youth's Companion, The Saturday
+Evening Post, Puck, Types, The League of American
+Wheelmen Bulletin_, and the publications of the American
+Press Association. Thanks are due to the editors
+of these periodicals for their courteous permission
+to reprint.
+
+J.C.L.
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+PREFACE
+
+LIST OF DRAWINGS
+
+THE COD-FISHER
+
+THE SONG OF THE SEA
+
+THE WIND'S SONG
+
+THE LIFE-SAVER
+
+"THE EVENIN' HYMN"
+
+THE MEADOW ROAD
+
+THE BULLFROG SERENADE
+
+SUNDAY AFTERNOONS
+
+THE OLD DAGUERREOTYPES
+
+THE BEST SPARE ROOM
+
+THE OLD CARRYALL
+
+OUR FIRST FIRE-CRACKERS
+
+WHEN NATHAN LED THE CHOIR
+
+HEZEKIAH'S ART
+
+THE SUNDAY-SCHOOL PICNIC
+
+"AUNT 'MANDY"
+
+THE STORY-BOOK BOY
+
+THE SCHOOL-COMMITTEE MAN
+
+WASTED ENERGY
+
+WHEN THE MINISTER COMES TO TEA
+
+"YAP"
+
+THE MINISTER'S WIFE
+
+THE VILLAGE ORACLE
+
+THE TIN PEDDLER
+
+"SARY EMMA'S PHOTYGRAPHS"
+
+WHEN PAPA's SICK
+
+THE BALLAD OF MCCARTY'S TROMBONE
+
+SUSAN VAN DOOZEN
+
+SISTER SIMMONS
+
+"THE FIFT' WARD J'INT DEBATE"
+
+HIS NEW BROTHER
+
+CIRCLE DAY
+
+SERMON TIME
+
+"TAKIN' BOARDERS"
+
+A COLLEGE TRAINING
+
+A CRUSHED HERO
+
+A THANKSGIVING DREAM
+
+O'REILLY'S BILLY-GOAT
+
+THE CUCKOO CLOCK
+
+THE POPULAR SONG
+
+MATILDY'S BEAU
+
+"SISTER'S BEST FELLER"
+
+"THE WIDDER CLARK"
+
+FRIDAY EVENING MEETINGS
+
+THE PARSON'S DAUGHTER
+
+MY OLD GRAY NAG
+
+THROUGH THE FOG
+
+THE BALLADE OF THE DREAM-SHIP
+
+LIFE'S PATHS
+
+THE MAYFLOWER
+
+MAY MEMORIES
+
+BIRDS'-NESTING TIME
+
+THE OLD SWORD ON THE WALL
+
+NINETY-EIGHT IN THE SHADE
+
+SUMMER NIGHTS AT GRANDPA'S
+
+GRANDFATHER'S "SUMMER SWEETS"
+
+MIDSUMMER
+
+"SEPTEMBER MORNIN'S"
+
+NOVEMBER'S COME
+
+THE WINTER NIGHTS AT HOME
+
+"THE LITTLE FELLER'S STOCKIN'"
+
+THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER
+
+THE CROAKER
+
+THE OLD-FASHIONED GARDEN
+
+THE LIGHT-KEEPER
+
+THE LITTLE OLD HOUSE BY THE SHORE
+
+WHEN THE TIDE GOES OUT
+
+THE WATCHERS
+
+"THE REG'LAR ARMY MAN"
+
+FIREMAN O'RAFFERTY
+
+LITTLE BARE FEET
+
+A RAINY DAY
+
+THE HAND-ORGAN BALL
+
+"JIM"
+
+IN MOTHER'S ROOM
+
+SUNSET-LAND
+
+THE SURF ALONG THE SHORE
+
+AT EVENTIDE
+
+INDEX OF FIRST LINES
+
+
+
+
+LIST OF DRAWINGS
+
+THE LIFE-SAVER,
+"He's a hero born and bred, but it hasn't
+swelled his head."
+
+THE BULLFROG SERENADE,
+"With the big green-coated leader's double-bass."
+
+THE OLD DAGUERREOTYPES,
+"Grandpa's collar a show."
+
+OUR FIRST FIRE-CRACKERS,
+"Do yer 'member how yer fired 'em, slow and
+careful, one by one?"
+
+HEZEKIAH'S ART,
+"I swan, he did look like a daisy!"
+
+THE SCHOOL-COMMITTEE MAN,
+"'And with--ahem--er--as I said before.'"
+
+WHEN THE MINISTER COMES TO TEA,
+"He sets and says it's lovely."
+
+THE VILLAGE ORACLE,
+"'Well now, I vum! I know, by gum!
+I'm right because I _be_!'"
+
+THE BALLAD OF MCCARTY'S TROMBONE,
+"'By--Killarney's--lakes--and--fells,
+Toot--tetoot toot--toot--toot--dells!'"
+
+His NEW BROTHER,
+"Why'd they buy a baby brother,
+When they know I'd _good_ deal ruther
+Have a dog?"
+
+A COLLEGE TRAINING,
+"'That was jolly, Guv'nor, now we'll practice every day.'"
+
+A THANKSGIVING DREAM,
+"He stood up on his drumsticks."
+
+THE POPULAR SONG,
+"The washwoman sings it all wrong."
+
+MATILDY'S BEAU,
+"I recollect I spent an hour a-tyin' my cravat."
+
+MY OLD GRAY NAG,
+"He ain't the sort that the big-bugs sport"
+
+MAY MEMORIES,
+"Oh, the lazy days of boyhood, when the
+world was fair and new!"
+
+NINETY-EIGHT IN THE SHADE,
+"Collar kerflummoxed all over my neck."
+
+NOVEMBER'S COME,
+"Hey, you swelled-up turkey feller!"
+
+THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER,
+"The Grasshopper wore his summer clothes,
+And stood there kicking his frozen toes."
+
+THE LIGHT-KEEPER,
+"It seems ter me that's all there is:
+jest do your duty right."
+
+"THE REG'LAR ARMY MAN,"
+"They ain't no tears shed over him
+When he goes off ter war."
+
+A RAINY DAY,
+"'Settin' 'round and dreamin'."
+
+"JIM,"
+"Seem to see her tucked in bed,
+With the kitten's furry head
+Peekin' out."
+
+
+
+
+CAPE COD BALLADS
+
+
+
+
+THE COD-FISHER
+
+Where leap the long Atlantic swells
+ In foam-streaked stretch of hill and dale,
+Where shrill the north-wind demon yells,
+ And flings the spindrift down the gale;
+Where, beaten 'gainst the bending mast,
+ The frozen raindrop clings and cleaves,
+With steadfast front for calm or blast
+ His battered schooner rocks and heaves.
+
+_To same the gain, to some the loss,
+ To each the chance, the risk, the fight:
+For men must die that men may live--
+ Lord, may we steer our course aright._.
+
+The dripping deck beneath him reels,
+ The flooded scuppers spout the brine;
+He heeds them not, he only feels
+ The tugging of a tightened line.
+
+The grim white sea-fog o'er him throws
+ Its clammy curtain, damp and cold;
+He minds it not--his work he knows,
+ 'T is but to fill an empty hold.
+
+Oft, driven through the night's blind wrack,
+ He feels the dread berg's ghastly breath,
+Or hears draw nigh through walls of black
+ A throbbing engine chanting death;
+But with a calm, unwrinkled brow
+ He fronts them, grim and undismayed,
+For storm and ice and liner's bow--
+ These are but chances of the trade.
+
+Yet well he knows--where'er it be,
+ On low Cape Cod or bluff Cape Ann--
+With straining eyes that search the sea
+ A watching woman waits her man:
+He knows it, and his love is deep,
+ But work is work, and bread is bread,
+And though men drown and women weep
+ The hungry thousands must be fed.
+
+_To some the gain, to some the loss_,
+ _To each his chance, the game with Fate_:
+_For men must die that men may live_--
+ _Dear Lord, be kind to those who wait_.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE SONG OF THE SEA
+
+ Oh, the song of the Sea--
+ The wonderful song of the Sea!
+Like the far-off hum of a throbbing drum
+ It steals through the night to me:
+ And my fancy wanders free
+ To a little seaport town,
+And a spot I knew, where the roses grew
+ By a cottage small and brown;
+ And a child strayed up and down
+ O'er hillock and beach and lea,
+And crept at dark to his bed, to hark
+ To the wonderful song of the Sea.
+
+ Oh, the song of the Sea--
+ The mystical song of the Sea!
+What strains of joy to a dreaming boy
+ That music was wont to be!
+ And the night-wind through the tree
+ Was a perfumed breath that told
+Of the spicy gales that filled the sails
+ Where the tropic billows rolled
+ And the rovers hid their gold
+ By the lone palm on the key,--
+But the whispering wave their secret gave
+ In the mystical song of the Sea.
+
+ Oh, the song of the Sea--
+ The beautiful song of the Sea!
+The mighty note from the ocean's throat,
+ The laugh of the wind in glee!
+ And swift as the ripples flee
+ With the surges down the shore,
+It bears me back, o'er life's long track,
+ To home and its love once more.
+ I stand at the open door,
+ Dear mother, again with thee,
+And hear afar on the booming bar
+ The beautiful song of the Sea.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE WIND'S SONG
+
+ Oh, the wild November wind,
+ How it blew!
+How the dead leaves rasped and rustled,
+Soared and sank and buzzed and bustled
+ As they flew;
+While above the empty square,
+Seeming skeletons in air,
+Battered branches, brown and bare,
+ Gauntly grinned;
+And the frightened dust-clouds, flying.
+Heard the calling and the crying
+ Of the wind,--
+ The wild November wind.
+
+ Oh, the wild November wind,
+ How it screamed!
+How it moaned and mocked and muttered
+At the cottage window, shuttered,
+ Whence there streamed
+Fitful flecks of firelight mild:
+And within, a mother smiled,
+Singing softly to her child
+ As there dinned
+Round the gabled roof and rafter
+Long and loud the shout and laughter
+ Of the wind,--
+ The wild November wind.
+
+ Oh, the wild November wind,
+ How it rang
+Through the rigging of a vessel
+Rocking where the great waves wrestle!
+ And it sang,
+Light and low, that mother's song;
+And the master, staunch and strong,
+Heard the sweet strain drift along--
+ Softened, thinned,--
+Heard the tightened cordage ringing
+Till it seemed a loved voice singing
+ In the wind,--
+ The wild November wind.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE LIFE-SAVER
+
+(_Dedicated to the Men in the United States Life-saving Service_.)
+
+When the Lord breathes his wrath above the bosom of the waters,
+ When the rollers are a-poundin' on the shore,
+When the mariner's a-thinkin' of his wife and sons and daughters,
+ And the little home he'll, maybe, see no more;
+When the bars are white and yeasty and the shoals are all a-frothin',
+ When the wild no'theaster's cuttin' like a knife;
+Through the seethin' roar and screech he's patrollin' on the beach,--
+ The Gov'ment's hired man fer savin' life.
+
+He's strugglin' with the gusts that strike and bruise him like a hammer,
+ He's fightin' sand that stings like swarmin' bees,
+He's list'nin' through the whirlwind and the thunder and the clamor--
+ A-list'nin' fer the signal from the seas;
+He's breakin' ribs and muscles launchin' life-boats in the surges,
+ He's drippin' wet and chilled in every bone,
+He's bringin' men from death back ter flesh and blood and breath,
+ And he never stops ter think about his own;
+
+He's a-pullin' at an oar that is freezin' to his fingers,
+ He's a-clingin' in the riggin' of a wreck,
+He knows destruction's nearer every minute that he lingers,
+ But it do'n't appear ter worry him a speck:
+He's draggin' draggled corpses from the clutches of the combers--
+ The kind of job a common chap would shirk--
+But he takes 'em from the wave and he fits 'em fer the grave,
+ And he thinks it's all included in his work.
+
+He is rigger, rower, swimmer, sailor, doctor, undertaker,
+ And he's good at every one of 'em the same:
+And he risks his life fer others in the quicksand and the breaker,
+ And a thousand wives and mothers bless his name.
+He's an angel dressed in oilskins, he's a saint in a "sou'wester",
+ He's as plucky as they make, or ever can;
+He's a hero born and bred, but it hasn't swelled his head,
+ And he's jest the U.S. Gov'ment's hired man.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"THE EVENIN' HYMN"
+
+When the hot summer daylight is dyin',
+ And the mist through the valley has rolled,
+And the soft velvet clouds ter the west'ard
+ Are purple with trimmings of gold,--
+Then, down in the medder-grass, dusky,
+ The crickets chirp out from each nook,
+And the frogs with their voices so husky
+ Jine in from the marsh and the brook.
+
+The chorus grows louder and deeper,
+ An owl sends a hoot from the hill,
+The leaves on the elm-trees are rustling
+ A whippoorwill calls by the mill.
+Where swamp honeysuckles are bloomin'
+ The breeze scatters sweets on the night,
+Like incense the evenin' perfumin',
+ With fireflies fer candles alight.
+
+And the noise of the frogs and the crickets
+ And the birds and the breeze are ter me
+Lots better than high-toned supraners,
+ Although they don't get to "high C";
+And the church, with its grand painted skylight,
+ Seems cramped and forbiddin' and grim
+'Side of my old front porch in the twilight
+ When God's choir sings its "Evenin' Hymn."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE MEADOW ROAD
+
+Just a simple little picture of a sunny country road
+ Leading down beside the ocean's pebbly shore,
+Where a pair of patient oxen slowly drag their heavy load,
+ And a barefoot urchin trudges on before:
+Yet I'm dreaming o'er it, smiling, and my thoughts are far away
+ 'Mid the glorious summer sunshine long ago,
+And once more a happy, careless boy, in memory I stray
+ Down a little country road I used to know.
+
+I hear the voice of "Father" as he drives the lumbering steers,
+ And the pigeons coo and flutter on the shed,
+While all the simple, homelike sounds come whispering to my ears,
+ And the cloudless sky of June is overhead;
+And again the yoke is creaking as the oxen swing and sway,
+ The old cart rattles loudly as it jars,
+Then we pass beneath the elm trees where the robin's song is gay,
+ And go out beyond the garden through the bars;
+
+Down the lane, behind the orchard where the wild rose blushes sweet,
+ Through the pasture, past the spring beside the brook
+Where the clover blossoms press their dewy kisses on my feet
+ And the honeysuckle scents each shady nook;
+By the meadow and the bushes, where the blackbirds build their nests,
+ Up the hill, beneath the shadow of the pine,
+Till the breath of Ocean meets us, dancing o'er his sparkling crests,
+ And our faces feel the tingling of the brine.
+
+And my heart leaps gayly upward, like the foam upon the sea,
+ As I watch the breakers tumbling with a roar,
+And the ships that dot the azure seem to wave a hail to me,
+ And to beckon to a wondrous, far-off shore.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Just a simple little picture, yet its charm is o'er me still,
+ And again my boyish spirit seems to glow,
+And once more a barefoot urchin am I wandering at will
+ Down that little country road I used to know.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+[Illustration]
+
+THE BULLFROG SERENADE
+
+ When the toil of day is over
+ And the dew is on the clover,
+And the night-hawk whirls in circles overhead;
+ When the cow-bells melt and mingle
+ In a softened, silver jingle,
+And the old hen calls the chickens in to bed;
+ When the marshy meadows glimmer
+ With a misty, purple shimmer,
+And the twilight flush is changing into shade;
+ When the firefly lamps are burning
+ And the dusk to dark is turning,--
+Then the bullfrogs chant their evening serenade:
+
+"Deep-deep, deep-deep, deep-deep, deep-deep!
+Better go '_round!_ Better go '_round!_ Better go '_round,_"
+
+ First the little chaps begin it,
+ Raise their high-pitched voices in it,
+And the shrill soprano piping sets the pace;
+ Then the others join the singing
+ Till the echoes soon are ringing
+With the big green-coated leader's double-bass.
+ All the lilies are a-quiver,
+ And the grasses by the river
+Feel the mighty chorus shaking every blade,
+ While the dewy rushes glisten
+ As they bend their heads to listen
+To the bullfrogs' summer evening serenade:
+
+"Deep-deep, deep-deep, deep-deep, deep-deep!
+Better go '_round!_ Better go '_round!_ Better go '_round!"_
+
+ And the melody they're tuning
+ Has the sweet and sleepy crooning
+That the mother hums the baby at her breast,
+ Till the world forgets its sorrow
+ And the cares that haunt the morrow,
+And is sinking, hushed and happy, to its rest
+ Sometimes bubbling o'er with gladness,
+ Sometimes soft and fall of sadness,
+Through my dreaming rings the music they have played,
+ And my memory's dearest treasures
+ Have been fitted to the measures
+Of the bullfrogs' summer evening serenade:
+
+"Deep-deep, deep-deep, deep-deep, deep-deep!
+Better go '_round!_ Better go '_round!_ Better go '_round!"_
+
+ * * * * *
+
+SUNDAY AFTERNOONS
+
+From the window of the chapel softly sounds an organ's note,
+Through the wintry Sabbath gloaming drifting shreds of music float,
+And the quiet and the firelight and the sweetly solemn tunes
+Bear me, dreaming, back to boyhood and its Sunday afternoons:
+
+When we gathered in the parlor, in the parlor stiff and grand,
+Where the haircloth chairs and sofas stood arrayed, a gloomy band,
+Where each queer oil portrait watched us with a countenance of wood,
+And the shells upon the what-not in a dustless splendor stood.
+
+Then the quaint old parlor organ with the quaver in its tongue,
+Seemed to tremble in its fervor as the sacred songs were sung,
+As we sang the homely anthems, sang the glad revival hymns
+Of the glory of the story and the light no sorrow dims.
+
+While the dusk grew ever deeper and the evening settled down,
+And the lamp-lit windows twinkled in the drowsy little town,
+Old and young we sang the chorus and the echoes told it o'er
+In the dear familiar voices, hushed or scattered evermore.
+
+From the window of the chapel faint and low the music dies,
+And the picture in the firelight fades before my tear-dimmed eyes,
+But my wistful fancy, listening, hears the night-wind hum the tunes
+That we sang there in the parlor on those Sunday afternoons.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+[Illustration]
+
+THE OLD DAGUERREOTYPES
+
+Up in the attic I found them, locked in the cedar chest,
+Where the flowered gowns lie folded, which once were brave as the best;
+And like the queer old jackets and the waistcoats gay with stripes,
+They tell of a worn-out fashion--these old daguerreotypes.
+Quaint little folding cases fastened with tiny hook,
+Seemingly made to tempt one to lift up the latch and look;
+Linings of purple velvet, odd little frames of gold,
+Circling the faded faces brought from the days of old.
+
+Grandpa and grandma, taken ever so long ago,
+Grandma's bonnet a marvel, grandpa's collar a show,
+Mother, a tiny toddler, with rings on her baby hands
+Painted--lest none should notice--in glittering, gilded bands.
+
+Aunts and uncles and cousins, a starchy and stiff array,
+Lovers and brides, then blooming,--now so wrinkled and gray:
+Out through the misty glasses they gaze at me, sitting here
+Opening the quaint old cases with a smile that is half a tear.
+
+I will smile no more, little pictures, for heartless it was, in truth,
+To drag to the cruel daylight these ghosts of a vanished youth;
+Go back to your cedar chamber, your gowns and your lavender,
+And dream, 'mid their bygone graces, of the wonderful days that were.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE BEST SPARE ROOM
+
+I remember, when a youngster, all the happy hours I spent
+When to visit Uncle Hiram in the country oft I went;
+And the pleasant recollection still in memory has a charm
+Of my boyish romps and rambles round the dear old-fashioned farm.
+But at night all joyous fancies from my youthful bosom crept,
+For I knew they'd surely put me where the "comp'ny" always slept,
+And my spirit sank within me, as upon it fell the gloom
+And the vast and lonely grandeur of the best spare room.
+
+Ah, the weary waste of pillow where I laid my lonely head!
+Sinking, like a shipwrecked sailor, in a patchwork sea of bed,
+While the moonlight through the casement cast a grim and ghastly glare
+O'er the stiff and stately presence of each dismal haircloth chair;
+And it touched the mantel's splendor, where the wax fruit used to be,
+And the alabaster image Uncle Josh brought home from sea;
+While the breeze that shook the curtains spread a musty, faint perfume
+And a subtle scent of camphor through the best spare room.
+
+Round the walls were hung the pictures of the dear ones passed away,
+"Uncle Si and A'nt Lurany," taken on their wedding day;
+Cousin Ruth, who died at twenty, in the corner had a place
+Near the wreath from Eben's coffin, dipped in wax and in a case;
+Grandpa Wilkins, done in color by some artist of the town,
+Ears askew and somewhat cross-eyed, but with fixed and awful frown,
+Seeming somehow to be waiting to enjoy the dreadful doom
+Of the frightened little sleeper in the best spare room.
+
+Every rustle of the corn-husks in the mattress underneath
+Was to me a ghostly whisper muttered through a phantom's teeth,
+And the mice behind the wainscot, as they scampered round about,
+Filled my soul with speechless horror when I'd put the candle out.
+So I'm deeply sympathetic when some story I have read
+Of a victim buried living by his friends who thought him dead;
+And I think I know his feelings in the cold and silent tomb,
+For I've slept at Uncle Hiram's in the best spare room.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE OLD CARRYALL
+
+It's alone in the dark of the old wagon-shed,
+Where the spider-webs swing from the beams overhead,
+And the sun, siftin' in through the dirt and the mold
+Of the winder's dim pane, specks it over with gold.
+Its curtains are tattered, its cushions are worn,
+It's a kind of a ghost of a carriage, forlorn,
+And the dust from the roof settles down like a pall
+On the sorrowin' shape of the old carryall.
+
+It was built long ago, when the world seemed ter be
+A heaven, jest made up for Mary and me,
+And my mind wanders back to that first happy ride
+When she sat beside me,--my beauty and bride.
+Ah, them were the days when the village was new
+And folks took time to live, as God meant 'em ter do;
+And there's many a huskin' and quiltin' and ball
+That we drove to and back in the old carryall.
+
+And here in the paint are the marks of the feet
+Where a little form climbed ter the high-fashioned seat,
+And soft baby fingers them curtains have swung,
+And a curly head's nestled the cushions among;
+And then come the gloom of that black, bitter day
+When "Thy will be done" looked so wicked ter say
+As we drove to the grave, while the rain seemed to fall
+Like the tears of the sky on the old carryall.
+
+And so it has served us through sunshine and cloud,
+Through fun'rals and weddin's, from bride-wreath ter shroud;
+It's old and it's rusty, it's shaky and lame,
+But I love every j'int of its rickety frame.
+And it's restin' at last, for its race has been run,
+It's lived out its life and its work has been done,
+And I hope, in my soul, at the last trumpet call
+I'll have done mine as well as the old carryall.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+OUR FIRST FIRE-CRACKERS
+
+O you boys grown gray and bearded, you that used ter chum with me
+In that lazy little village down beside the tumblin' sea,
+When yer sniff the burnin' powder, when yer see the banners fly,
+Don't yer thoughts, like mine, go driftin' back to Fourths long since
+ gone by?
+And, amongst them days of gladness, ain't there one that stands alone,
+When yer had yer first fire-crackers--jest one bunch, but all yer own?
+
+Don't yer 'member how yer envied bigger chaps their fuss and noise,
+'Cause yer Ma had said that crackers wasn't good fer _little_ boys?
+Do yer 'member how yer teased her, morn and eve and noon and night,
+And how all the world yelled "Glory!" when at last she said yer might?
+
+Do yer 'member how yer bought 'em, weeks and weeks ahead of time,
+After savin' all yer pennies till they footed up a dime?
+Do yer 'member what they looked like? I can see 'em plain as plain,
+With a dragon on the package, grinnin' through a fiery rain.
+
+[Illustration]
+
+Do yer 'member how yer fired 'em, slow and careful, one by one?
+Do'n't it seem like each was louder than the grandest sort of gun?
+Can't yer see the big, red flashes, if yer only shut yer eyes,
+And jest smell the burnin' powder, sweeter'n breaths from paradise?
+
+O you boys, gray-haired and bearded. O you youngsters grown ter men,
+We can't buy them kind of crackers now, nor never shall again!
+Fer the joys thet used ter glitter through the fizz and puff and crash,
+Has, ter most of us, been deadened by the grindin' chink of cash;
+But I'd like ter ask yer, fellers, how much of yer hoarded gold
+Would yer give if it could buy yer one glad Fourth like them of old?
+How much would yer spend ter gain it--that light-hearted, joyous glow
+That come with yer fust fire-crackers, when yer bought 'em long ago?
+
+ * * * * *
+
+WHEN NATHAN LED THE CHOIR
+
+I s'pose I hain't progressive, but I swan, it seems ter me
+Religion isn't nigh so good as what it used ter be!
+I go ter meetin' every week and rent my reg'lar pew,
+But hain't a mite uplifted when the sarvices are through;
+I take my orthodoxy straight, like Gran'pop did his rum,
+(It never hurt him, neither, and a deacon, too, by gum!)
+But now the preachin' 's mushy and the singin' 's lost its fire:
+I 'd like ter hear old Parson Day, with Nathan leadin' choir.
+
+I'd like ter know who told these folks that all was perfect peace,
+And glidin' inter heaven was as slick as meltin' grease;
+Old Parson Day, I tell yer what, his sermons made yer _think_!
+He'd shake yer over Tophet till yer heard the cinders clink.
+And then, when he'd gin out the tune and Nate would take his stand
+Afore the chosen singers, with the tuning-fork in hand,
+The meetin'-house jest held its breath, from cellar plum ter spire,
+And then bu'st forth in thunder-tones with Nathan leadin' choir.
+
+They didn't chime so pretty, p'r'aps, as does our new quartette,
+But all them folks was there ter sing, and done it, too, you bet!
+The basses they 'd be rollin' on, with faces swelled and red,
+And racin' the supraners, who was p'r'aps a bar ahead;
+While Nate beat time with both his hands and worked like drivin' plow,
+With drops o' sweat a-standin' out upon his face and brow;
+And all the congregation felt that Heav'n was shorely nigher
+Whene'er they heerd the chorus sung with Nathan leadin' choir.
+
+Rube Swan was second tenor, and his pipes was kinder cracked,
+But Rube made up in loudness what in tune he might have lacked;
+But 'twas a leetle cur'us, though, for p'r'aps his voice would balk,
+And when he'd fetch a high note give a most outrageous squawk;
+And Uncle Elkanah was deef and kind er'd lose the run,
+And keep on singin' loud and high when all the rest was done;
+But, notwithstandin' all o' this, I think I'd never tire
+Of list'nin' ter the good old tunes with Nathan leadin' choir.
+
+We've got a brand-new organ now, and singers--only four--
+But, land! we pay 'em cash enough ter fee a hundred more;
+They sing newfangled tunes and things that some folks think are sweet,
+But don't appeal ter me no more'n a fish-horn on the street.
+I'd like once more ter go ter church and watch old Nathan wave
+His tunin'-fork above the crowd and lead the glorious stave;
+I'd like ter hear old Parson Day jest knock the sinners higher,
+And then set back and hear a hymn with Nathan leadin' choir.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+HEZEKIAH'S ART
+
+My son Hezekiah's a painter; yes, that's the purfession he's at;
+An artist, I mean,--course he ain't a whitewasher or nothin' like that.
+At home he was always a-drawin' and shirkin' his work 'round the place,
+And kept me continyerly jawin' or dressin' him down with a trace;
+Till I says ter Mother, "Between us, this thing might's well be understood;
+Our Hez is jest simply a gen'us, and a gen'us is _never_ no good;
+He won't stop fer jawin's and dressin's; he'll daub and he'll draw
+ all the while;
+So he might as well have a few lessons, and learn how ter do it in style."
+
+So I sold a slice of the wood-lot ter the folks at the summer hotel,
+That fetched me some cash--quite a good lot--so now he's been gone a
+ long spell;
+He's got a room up ter the City, an' calls it a name that is queer--
+I ain't up in French, more's the pity--but something that's like
+ "attyleer."
+I went up last month on a visit, and blamed if that place wa'n't a sight!
+The fourteenth or fifteenth--which is it?--well, anyhow, it's the top
+ flight;
+I wouldn't have b'lieved he could be there, way up on that
+ breath-takin' floor,
+If't wa'n't fer the sign that I see there--"H. Lafayette Boggs"--on
+ the door.
+
+That room was a wonder fer certain! The floor was all paint-spots and dirt,
+Each window was hung with a curtain, striped gay as a calico shirt;
+The walls was jest like a museum, all statoos and flim-flam and gush
+And picters--good land! when I see 'em I jest had ter turn 'round and
+ blush;
+And Hez! he looked like a gorilla,--a leetle round hat on his head,
+And hair that would stuff a big piller, and necktie blue, yeller, and red;
+I swan, he did look like a daisy! I tell yer, it went ter my heart,
+'Cause, course I supposed he was crazy, until he explained it was ART.
+
+[Illustration: "I swan, he did look like a daisy!"]
+
+This Art, it does stagger a feller that ain't got a connerseer's view,
+Fer trees by its teachin' is yeller, and cows is a shade of sky-blue.
+Hez says that ter paint 'em like natur' is common and tawdry and vile;
+He says it's a plaguey sight greater to do 'em "impressionist style."
+He done me my portrait, and, reely, my nose is a ultrymarine,
+My whiskers is purple and steely, and both of my cheeks is light green.
+When Mother first viewed it she fainted--she ain't up in Art, don't
+ yer see?
+And she had a notion 'twas painted when Hez had been off on a spree.
+
+We used ter think Hezzy would shame us by bein' no good anyhow,
+But he says some day he'l be famous, so we're sort er proud of him, now.
+He says that the name he's a-makin' shall ring in Fame's thunderin' tone;
+He says that earth's dross he's forsaken, he's livin' fer Art's sake alone.
+That's nice, but what seems ter me funny, and what I can't get through
+ my head
+Is why he keeps writin' fer money and can't seem ter earn nary red.
+I've been sort er thinkin' it over, and seems ter me, certain enough,
+That livin' _for_ Art is just clover, but that livin' _on_ it is tough.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE SUNDAY-SCHOOL PICNIC
+
+Oh! the horns are all a-tootin' as we rattle through the town,
+And we fellers are a-hootin' and a-jumpin' up and down,
+And the girls are all a-gigglin' and a-tryin' ter be smart,
+With their braided pig-tails wigglin' at the joltin' of the cart;
+There's the teachers all a-beamin', rigged up in their Sunday clothes,
+And the parson's specs a-gleamin' like two moons acrost his nose,
+And the sup'rintendent lookin' mighty dignerfied and cool,
+And a-bossin' of the picnic of the Baptist Sunday-school.
+
+Everybody's got their basket brimmin' full of things ter eat,
+And I've got one--if yer ask it--that is purty hard ter beat,--
+'Cept that Sis put in some pound-cake that she made herself alone,
+And I bet yer never found cake that was quite so much like stone.
+There'll be quarts of sass'parilla; yes, and "lemmo" in a tub;
+There'll be ice-cream--it's vernilla--and all kinds of fancy grub;
+And they're sure ter spread the table on the ground beside the spring,
+So's the ants and hoppergrasses can just waltz on everything.
+
+Then the girls they'll be a-yippin', 'cause a bug is in the cream;
+And a "daddy-long-legs" skippin' round the butter makes 'em scream;
+And a fuzzy caterpillar--jest the littlest kind they make--
+Sets 'em holl'rin', "Kill her! kill her!" like as if it was a snake.
+Then, when dinner-time is over and we boys have et enough,
+Why, the big girls they'll pick clover, or make wreaths of leaves and
+ stuff;
+And the big chaps they'll set 'round 'em, lookin' soft as ever wuz,
+Talkin' gush and actin' silly, same as that kind always does.
+
+Then, we'll ride home when it's dark'nin' and the leaves are wet with dew,
+And the lightnin'-bugs are sparklin' and the moon is shinin', too;
+We'll sing "Jingle bells" and "Sailing," "Seein' Nelly home," and more;
+And that one that's slow and wailin', "Home ag'in from somethin' shore."
+Then a feller's awful sleepy and he kinder wants ter rest,
+But the stuff he's et feels creepy and like bricks piled on his chest;
+And, perhaps, he dreams his stummick has been stepped on by a mule;
+But it ain't: it's jest the picnic of the Baptist Sunday school!
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"AUNT 'MANDY"
+
+Our Aunt 'Mandy thinks that boys
+Never ought ter make a noise,
+Or go swimming or play ball,
+Or have any fun at all;
+Thinks a boy had ought ter be
+Dressed up all the time, and she
+Hollers jest as if she's hurt
+At the _littlest mite_ er dirt
+On a feller's hands or face,
+Or his clothes, or any place.
+
+Then at dinner-time she's there,
+Sayin', "Mustn't kick the chair!"
+Or "Why _don't_ yer sit up straight?"
+"'Tain't perlite to drum yer plate."
+An' yer got ter eat as _slow_,
+'Cause she's dingin' at yer so.
+Then, when Chris'mus comes, she brings
+Nothin', only _useful_ things:
+Han'kershi'fs an' gloves an' ties,
+Sunday stuff yer jest _despise_.
+
+She's a ole maid, all alone,
+'Thout no children of her own,
+An' I s'pose that makes her fuss
+'Round our house a-bossin' us.
+If she 'd had a boy, I bet,
+'Tween her bossin' and her fret
+She'd a-killed him, jest about;
+So God made her do without,
+For he knew _no_ boy could stay
+With Aunt 'Mandy _every_ day.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE STORY-BOOK BOY
+
+Oh, the story-book boy! he's a wonderful youth,
+A prodigy reeking with goodness and truth;
+As brave as a lion, as wise as a sage,
+And sharp as a razor, though twelve years of age.
+His mother is good and she's awfully poor,
+But he says, "Do not fret, _I'll_ provide for you, sure!"
+And the hard grasping landlord, who comes to annoy,
+Is braved to his teeth by the story-book boy.
+
+Oh, the story-book boy! when he sees that young churl.
+The Squire's spoiled son, kick the poor crippled girl,
+He darts to the rescue as quick as he can,
+And dusts the hard road with the cruel young man;
+And when he is sought by the vengeful old Squire,
+He withers the latter with tongue-lashing ire;
+For the town might combine his young nerve to destroy,
+And never once shake him--the story-book boy.
+
+[Illustration: "And with--ahem--era--I said before."]
+
+Oh, the story-book boy! when the Judge's dear child
+Is dragged through the streets by a runaway wild,
+Of course he's on hand, and a "ten-strike" he makes,
+For he stops the mad steed in a couple of "shakes";
+And he tells the glad Judge, who has wept on his hat,
+"I did but my duty!" or something like that;
+And the very best place in the Judge's employ
+Is picked out at once for the story-book boy.
+
+Oh, the story-book boy! all his troubles are o'er,
+For he gets to be Judge in a year or two more;
+And the wicked old landlord in poverty dies,
+And the Squire's son drinks, and in gutters he lies;
+But the girl whom he saved is our hero's fair bride,
+And his old mother comes to their home to abide;
+In silks and sealskins, she cries, in her joy:
+"Thank Heaven, I'm Ma of a story-book boy!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE SCHOOL-COMMITTEE MAN
+
+Sometimes when we're in school, and it's the afternoon and late,
+ And kinder warm and sleepy, don't yer know;
+And p'r'aps a feller's studyin' or writin' on his slate,
+ Or, maybe chewin' paper-balls to throw,
+And teacher's sort er lazy, too--why, then there'll come a knock
+ And everybody'll brace up quick's they can;
+We boys and girls'll set up straight, and teacher'll smooth her frock,
+ Because it's him--the school-committee man.
+
+He'll walk in kinder stately-like and say, "How do, Miss Brown?"
+ And teacher, she'll talk sweet as choclate cake;
+And he'll put on his specs and cough and pull his eyebrows down
+ And look at us so hard 't would make yer shake.
+We'll read and spell, so's he can hear, and speak a piece or two,
+ While he sets there so dreadful grand and cool;
+Then teacher'll rap her desk and say, "Attention!" soon's we're through,
+ And ask him, won't he please address the school.
+
+He'll git up kinder calm and slow, and blow his nose real loud,
+ And put his hands behind beneath his coat,
+Then kinder balance on his toes and look 'round sort er proud
+ And give a big "Ahem!" ter clear his throat;
+And then he'll say: "Dear scholars, I am glad ter see yer here,
+ A-drinkin'--er--the crystal fount of lore;
+Here with your books, and--er--and--er--your teacher kind and dear,
+ And with--ahem--er--as I said before."
+
+We have ter listen awful hard ter every word of his
+ And watch him jest like kittens do a rat,
+And laugh at every joke he makes, don't care how old it is,
+ 'Cause he can _boss the teacher_,--think of that!
+I useter say, when I growed up I 'd be a circus chap
+ And drive two lions hitched up like a span;
+But, honest, more I think of it, I b'lieve the bestest snap
+ Is jest ter be a school-committee man.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+WASTED ENERGY
+
+South Pokus is religious,--that's the honest, livin' truth;
+South Pokus folks are pious,--man and woman, maid and youth;
+And they listen every Sunday, though it rains or snows or shines,
+In their seven shabby churches, ter their seven poor divines,
+Who dispense the balm and comfort that the thirstin' sperit needs,
+By a-fittin' of the gospel ter their seven different creeds,
+Each one sure his road ter Heaven is the only sartin way,--
+Fer South Pokus is religious, as I started off ter say.
+
+Now the Pokus population is nine hundred, more or less,
+Which, in one big congregation, would be quite a church, I guess,
+And do lots of good, I reckon; but yer see it couldn't be,--
+Long's one's tweedledum was diff'rent from the other's tweedledee.
+So the Baptists they are Baptists, though the church is swamped in debt,
+And the Orthodox is rigid, though expenses can't be met,
+And the twenty Presbyterians 'll be Calvinists or bust,--
+Fer South Pokus is religious, as I said along at fust.
+
+And the Methodist is buried, when his time comes 'round ter die,
+In the little weedy graveyard where no other sect can lie,
+And at Second Advent socials, every other Wednesday night,
+No one's ever really welcome but a Second Adventite;
+While the Unitarian brother, as he walks the village streets,
+Seldom bows unless another Unitarian he meets;
+And there's only Univers'lists in a Univers'list's store,--
+Fer South Pokus is religious, as I think I said before.
+
+I thought I'd read that Jesus come ter do the whole world good,--
+Come ter bind the Jew and Gentile in a lovin' brotherhood;
+But it seems that I'm mistaken, and I haven't read it right,
+And the text of "_Love_ your neighbor" must be somewhere written "Fight";
+But I want ter tell yer, church folks, and ter put it to yer strong,
+While _you're fighting_ Old Nick's fellers _pull tergether_ right along:
+So yer'd better stop your squabblin', be united if yer can,
+Fer the Pokus way of doin' ain't no use ter God or man.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+WHEN THE MINISTER COMES TO TEA
+
+Oh! they've swept the parlor carpet, and they've dusted every chair,
+And they've got the tidies hangin' jest exactly on the square;
+And the what-not's fixed up lovely, and the mats have all been beat,
+And the pantry's brimmin' over with the bully things ter eat;
+Sis has got her Sunday dress on, and she's frizzin' up her bangs;
+Ma's got on her best alpacky, and she's askin' how it hangs;
+Pa has shaved as slick as can be, and I'm rigged way up in G,--
+And it's all because we're goin' ter have the minister ter tea.
+
+[Illustration]
+
+Oh! the table's fixed up gaudy with the gilt-edged chiny set,
+And we'll use the silver tea-pot and the comp'ny spoons, you bet;
+And we're goin' ter have some fruit-cake and some thimbleberry jam,
+And "riz biscuits," and some doughnuts, and some chicken, and some ham.
+Ma, she'll 'polergize like fury and say everything is bad,
+And "Sich awful luck with cookin'," she is sure she never had;
+But, er course, she's only bluffin', for it's as prime as it can be,
+And she's only talkin' that way 'cause the minister's ter tea.
+
+Everybody'll be a-smilin' and as good as ever was,
+Pa won't growl about the vittles, like he generally does,
+And he'll ask me would I like another piece er pie; but, sho!
+That, er course, is only manners, and I'm s'posed ter answer "No."
+Sis'll talk about the church-work and about the Sunday-school,
+Ma'll tell how she liked that sermon that was on the Golden Rule,
+And if I upset my tumbler they won't say a word ter me:--
+Yes, a boy can eat in comfort with the minister ter tea!
+
+Say! a minister, you'd reckon, never 'd say what wasn't true;
+But that isn't so with ours, and I jest can prove it, too;
+'Cause when Sis plays on the organ so it makes yer want ter die,
+Why, he sets and says it's lovely; and that, seems ter me, 's a lie:
+But I like him all the samey, and I only wish he'd stay
+At our house fer good and always, and eat with us every day;
+Only think of havin' goodies _every_ evenin'! Jimmi_nee_!
+And I'd _never_ git a scoldin' with the minister ter tea!
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"YAP"
+
+I've got a little yaller dog, a wuthless kind of chap,
+Who jest ain't good fer nothin' but ter eat and sleep and "yap."
+Fer all 'round general wuthlessness I never see his beat,
+And yet he makes more fuss and noise than all the farm complete.
+There ain't a mite of sense inside that yaller hide of his;
+But, as _he_ ain't no good, he likes ter pester them that is.
+The critters all despise him, but there ain't a one but feels
+A little mite oneasy when he's "yappin'" round their heels.
+
+Yer see, he loves ter sneak around behind 'em, out of sight,
+And give a sudden snap and snarl as if he meant ter bite;
+Of course they know he wouldn't hurt, and only means to scare,
+But still, it worries 'em ter know the little scamp is there;
+And if they do git nervous-like and try to hit him back
+He swells up so with pride it seems as if his skin would crack;
+And then he's wuss than ever, so they find it doesn't pay,
+But let him keep on "yappin'" till he's tired and goes away.
+
+There's lots of people built like him--yer see 'em everywhere--
+Who, 'cause they ain't no use themselves, can't somehow seem ter bear
+Ter see another feller rise, but in their petty spite
+And natural meanness, snarl and snap and show they'd like ter bite.
+They don't come out in front like men, and squarely speak their mind,
+But like that wuthless yaller pup, they're hangin' 'round behind.
+They're little and contemptible, but if yer make a slip
+It must be bothersome ter know they'll take that chance ter nip.
+
+But there! perhaps it isn't right ter mind 'em, after all;
+Perhaps we ought ter thank the Lord _our_ souls ain't quite so small;
+And they, with all their sneakin' ways, must be, I rather guess,
+The thorns that prick your fingers 'round the roses of success:
+Fer, when yer come ter think of it, they never bark until
+A feller's really started and a good ways up the hill;
+So, 'f I was climbin' up ter fame I wouldn't care a rap,
+But I'd think I _was_ somebody when the curs begun ter "yap."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE MINISTER'S WIFE
+
+She's little and modest and purty,
+ As red as a rose and as sweet;
+_Her_ children don't ever look dirty,
+ Her kitchen ain't no way but neat.
+She's the kind of a woman ter cherish,
+ A help ter a feller through life,
+Yet every old hen in the parish
+ Is down on the minister's wife.
+
+'Twas Mrs. 'Lige Hawkins begun it;
+ She always has had the idee
+That the church was built so's she could run it,
+ 'Cause Hawkins is deacon, yer see;
+She thought that the whole congregation
+ Kept step ter the tune of her fife,
+But she found 't was a wrong calkerlation
+ Applied ter the minister's wife.
+
+Then Mrs. Jedge Jenks got excited--
+ She thinks she's the whole upper crust;--
+When she found the Smiths was invited
+ Ter meet'n', she quit in disgust.
+"_You_ can have all the paupers yer choose to,"
+ Says she, jest as sharp as a knife;
+"But if _they_ go ter church _I_ refuse to!"
+ "Good-by!" says the minister's wife.
+
+And then Mrs. Jackson got stuffy
+ At her not comin' sooner ter call,
+And old Miss Macgregor is huffy
+ 'Cause she went up ter Jackson's at all.
+Each one of the crowd hates the other,
+ The church has been full of their strife;
+But now they're all hatin' another,
+ And that one's the minister's wife.
+
+But still, all their cackle unheedin',
+ She goes, in her ladylike way,
+A-givin' the poor what they're needing
+ And helpin' the church every day:
+Our numbers each Sunday is swelling
+ And real, true religion is rife,
+And sometimes I feel like a-yellin',
+ "Three cheers fer the minister's wife!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+[Illustration: "'Well, now, I vum! I know, by gum! I'm right because
+I _be_!'"]
+
+THE VILLAGE ORACLE
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"_I am Sir Oracle, and when I ope my lips let no dog bark!_"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Old Dan'l Hanks he says this town
+ Is jest the best on earth;
+He says there ain't one, up nor down,
+ That's got one half her worth;
+He says there ain't no other state
+ That's good as ourn, nor near;
+And all the folks that's good and great
+ Is settled right 'round here.
+
+ Says I "D'jer ever travel, Dan?"
+ "You bet I ain't!" says he;
+ "I tell you what! the place I've got
+ Is good enough fer me!"
+
+He says the other party's fools,
+ 'Cause they don't vote his way;
+He says the "feeble-minded schools"
+ Is where they ought ter stay;
+If he was law their mouths he'd shut,
+ Or blow 'em all ter smash;
+He says their platform's nawthin' but
+ A great big mess of trash.
+
+ Says I, "D'jer ever read it, Dan?"
+ "You bet I ain't!" says he;
+ "And when I do; well, I tell you,
+ I'll let you know, by gee!"
+
+He says that all religion's wrong
+ 'Cept jest what he believes;
+He says them ministers belong
+ In jail, the same as thieves;
+He says they take the blessed Word
+ And tear it all ter shreds;
+He says their preachin's jest absurd;
+ They're simply leatherheads.
+
+ Says I, "D'jer ever hear 'em, Dan?"
+ "You bet I ain't!" says he;
+ "I'd never go ter _hear_ 'em; no;
+ They make me sick ter _see!_"
+
+Some fellers reckon, more or less,
+ Before they speak their mind,
+And sometimes calkerlate or guess,--
+ But them ain't Dan'l's kind.
+The Lord knows all things, great or small,
+ With doubt he's never vexed;
+He, in his wisdom, knows it all,--
+ But Dan'l Hanks comes next.
+
+ Says I, "How d' yer know you're right?"
+ "How do I _know_?" says he;
+ "Well, now, I vum! I know, by gum!
+ I'm right because I _be_!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE TIN PEDDLER
+
+Jason White has come ter town
+ Drivin' his tin peddler's cart,
+Pans a-bangin' up an' down
+ Like they'd tear theirselves apart;
+Kittles rattlin' underneath,
+ Coal-hods scrapin' out a song,--
+Makes a feller grit his teeth
+ When old Jason comes along.
+
+Jason drives a sorrel mare,
+ Bones an' skin at all her j'ints,
+"Blooded stock," says Jase; "I swear,
+ Jest see how she shows her p'ints!
+Walkin' 's her best lay," says he,
+ Eyes a-twinklin' full of fun,
+"Named her Keely Motor. See?
+ Sich hard work ter make her run."
+
+Jason's jest the slickest scamp,
+ Full of jokes as he can hold;
+Says he beats Aladdin's lamp,
+ Givin' out new stuff fer old;
+"Buy your rags fer more 'n they're worth,
+ Give yer bran'-new, shiny tin,
+I'm the softest snap on earth,"
+ Says old Jason, with a grin.
+
+Jason gits the women's ear
+ Tellin' news and talkin' dress;
+Can 't be peddlin' forty year
+ An' not know 'em more or less;
+Children like him; sakes alive!
+ Why, my Jim, the other night,
+Says, "When I git big I'll drive
+ Peddler's cart, like Jason White!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"SARY EMMA'S PHOTYGRAPHS"
+
+Our Sary Emma is possessed ter be at somethin' queer;
+She's allers doin' loony things, unheard of fur and near.
+One time there wa'n't no limit ter the distance she would tramp
+Ter get a good-fer-nothin', wuthless, cancelled postage-stamp;
+Another spell folks couldn't rest ontil, by hook or crook,
+She got 'em all ter write their names inside a leetle book;
+But though them fits was bad enough, the wust is nowadays,
+Fer now she's got that pesky freak, the photygraphin' craze.
+
+She had ter have a camera--and them things cost a sight--
+So she took up subscriptions fer the "Woman's Home Delight"
+And got one fer a premium--a blamed new-fangled thing,
+That takes a tin-type sudden, when she presses on a spring;
+And sence she got it, sakes alive! there's nothin' on the place
+That hain't been pictured lookin' like a horrible disgrace:
+The pigs, the cows, the horse, the colt, the chickens large and small;
+She goes a-gunnin' fer 'em, and she bags 'em, one and all.
+
+She tuk me once a-settin' up on top a load er hay:
+My feet shets out the wagon, and my head's a mile away;
+She took her Ma in our back yard, a-hanging out the clothes,
+With hands as big as buckets, and a face that's mostly nose.
+A yard of tongue and monstrous teeth is what she calls a dog;
+The cat's a kind er fuzzy-lookin' shadder in a fog;
+And I've got a suspicion that what killed the brindle calf
+Was that he seen his likeness in our Sary's photygraph.
+
+She's "tonin'," er "develerpin'," er "printin'," ha'f the time;
+She's allers buyin' pasteboard ter mount up her latest crime:
+Our front room and the settin'-room is like some awful show,
+With freaks and framed outrages stuck all 'round 'em in a row:
+But soon I'll take them picters, and I'll fetch some of 'em out
+And hang 'em 'round the garden when the corn begins ter sprout;
+We'll have no crows and blackbirds ner that kind er feathered trash,
+'Cause them photygraphs of Sary's, they beat scarecrows all ter smash.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+WHEN PAPA'S SICK
+
+When Papa's sick, my goodness sakes!
+Such awful, awful times it makes.
+He speaks in, oh! such lonesome tones,
+And gives such ghas'ly kind of groans,
+And rolls his eyes and holds his head,
+And makes Ma help him up to bed,
+While Sis and Bridget run to heat
+Hot-water bags to warm his feet,
+And I must get the doctor _quick_,--
+We have to _jump_ when Papa's sick.
+
+When Papa's sick Ma has to stand
+Right 'side the bed and hold his hand,
+While Sis, she has to fan an' fan,
+For he says he's "a dyin' man,"
+And wants the children round him to
+Be there when "sufferin' Pa gets through";
+He says he wants to say good-by
+And kiss us all, and then he'll die;
+Then moans and says his "breathin''s thick",--
+It's awful sad when Papa's sick.
+
+When Papa's sick he acts that way
+Until he hears the doctor say,
+"You've only got a cold, you know;
+You'll be all right 'n a day or so";
+And then--well, say! you ought to see--
+He's different as he can be,
+And growls and swears from noon to night
+Just 'cause his dinner ain't cooked right;
+And all he does is fuss and kick,--
+We're _all_ used up when Papa's sick.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+[Illustration]
+
+THE BALLAD OF McCARTY'S TROMBONE
+
+Sure, Felix McCarty he lived all alone
+On the top av a hill be the town av Athione,
+And the pride av his heart was a batthered trombone,
+That he played in an iligant style av his own.
+And often I've heard me ould grandfather say,
+That, long as he lived, on Saint Patherick's Day,
+the minute the dawn showed the first streak av gray
+McCarty would rise and this tune he would play:
+
+ "Pertaters and fishes make very good dishes,
+ Saint Patherick's Day in the mornin'!"
+ With tootin' and blowin' he kept it a-goin',
+ For rest was a thing he was scornin';
+ And thim that were lazy could niver lie aisy,
+ But jumped out av bed at the warnin';
+ For who could be stayin' aslape with him playin'
+ "Saint Patherick's Day in the mornin'?"
+
+And thin whin the b'ys would fall in fer parade,
+McCarty'd be gay with his buttons and braid,
+And whin he stipped out fer ter head the brigade,
+Why, this was the beautiful tune that he played:
+
+ "By--Killarney's--lakes--and--fells,
+ Toot--tetoot toot--toot--toot--dells!"
+ And--the heel av--McCart--y's--boot
+ Marked--the time at--iv'--ry--toot,
+ While--the slide at--aich--bass--note
+ Seemed--ter slip half--down--his throat,
+ As--he caught his--breath--be--spells:--
+ "By--Killarney's--lakes--and--fells!"
+
+Now McCarty he lived ter be wrinkled and lean,
+But he died wan fine day playin' "Wearin' the green,"
+And they sould the ould horn to a British spalpeen,
+And it bu'st whin he tried ter blow "God save the Queen";
+
+But the nights av Saint Patherick's Days in Athlone
+Folks dare not go by the ould graveyard alone,
+For they say that McCarty sits on his tombstone
+And plays this sad tune on a phantom trombone:
+
+ "The harp that wance through Tara's halls
+ The sowl av music shed,
+ Now hangs as mute on Tara's walls
+ As if that sowl were dead."
+ And all who've heard the lonesome _keens_
+ That that grim ghost has blown,
+ Know well by Tara's harp he means
+ That batthered ould trombone.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+SUSAN VAN DOOZEN
+
+I'll write, for I'm witty, a popular ditty,
+ To bring to me shekels and fame,
+And the only right way one may write one to-day
+ Is to give it some Irish girl's name.
+There's "Rosy O'Grady," that dear "steady lady,"
+ And sweet "Annie Rooney" and such,
+But mine shall be nearly original, really,
+ For Susan Van Doozen is Dutch.
+
+_O Susan Van Doozen! the girl of my choos'n',_
+ _You stick in my bosom like glue;
+While this you're perusin', remember I'm mus'n',_
+ _Sweet Susan Van Doozen, on you.
+So don't be refus'n' my offer, and bruis'n'_
+ _A heart that is willing to woo;
+And please be excus'n', not cold and refus'n',--
+ O Susan Van Doozen, please do_!
+
+Now through it I'll scatter--a quite easy matter--
+ Some lines that we all of us know,
+How "The neighbors all cry as she passes them by,
+ 'There's Susan, the pride of the row!'"
+And something like "daisy" and "setting me crazy,"
+ --These lines the dear public would miss--
+Then chuck a "sweetheart" in, and "never to part" in,
+ And end with a chorus like this:
+
+ _O Susan Van Doozen! before I'd be los'n'
+ One glance from your eyes of sky-blue,
+ I vow I'd quit us'n' tobacco and booz'n',
+ (That word is not nice, it is true).
+ I wear out my shoes, 'n' I'm los'n' my roos'n'_
+ _My reason, I should say, dear Sue_,--
+ _So please change your views 'n' become my own Susan_,
+ _O Susan Van Doozen, please do_!
+
+ * * * * *
+
+SISTER SIMMONS
+
+Almost every other evening jest as reg'lar as the clock
+When we're settin' down ter supper, wife and I, there comes a knock
+An' a high-pitched voice, remarking', "Don't get up; it's _me_, yer know";
+An' our mercury drops from "summer" down ter "twenty-five below,"
+An' our cup of bliss turns sudden inter wormwood mixed with gall,
+Fer we know it's Sister Simmons come ter make her "reg'lar call."
+
+In she comes an' takes the rocker. Thinks she'll slip her bunnit off,
+But she'll keep her shawl on, coz she's 'fraid of addin' ter her cough.
+No, she won't set down ter supper. Tea? well, yes, a half er cup.
+Her dyspepsy's been so lately, seems as if she _should_ give up;
+An', 'tween rheumatiz an' as'ma, she's jest worn ter skin an' bone.
+It's a good thing that she told us,--by her looks we'd never known.
+
+Next, she starts in on the neighbors; tells us all their private cares,
+While we have the fun er knowin' how she talks of _our_ affairs;
+Says, with sobs, that Christmas comin' makes her feel _so_ bad, for, oh!
+Her Isaiah, the dear departed, allers did enjoy it so.
+Her Isaiah, poor henpecked critter, 's been dead seven years er more,
+An' looked happier in his coffin than he ever did afore.
+
+So she sits, her tongue a-waggin' in the same old mournful tones,
+Spoilin' all our quiet evenin's with her troubles an' her groans,
+Till, by Jude, I'm almost longin' fer those mansions of the blest,
+"Where the wicked cease from troublin' an' the weary are at rest!"
+But if Sister Simmons' station is before the Throne er Grace,
+I'll just ask 'em to excuse me, an' I'll try the other place.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"THE FIFT' WARD J'INT DEBATE"
+
+Now Councilman O'Hoolihan do'n't b'lave in annixation,
+He says thim Phillypynos air the r-r-ruin av the nation.
+He says this counthry's job is jist a-mindin' av her biz,
+And imparyilism's thrayson, so ut is, so ut is.
+But big Moike Macnamara, him that runs the gin saloon,
+He wants the nomina-a-tion, so he sings a different chune;
+He's a-howlin' fer ixpansion, so he puts ut on the shlate
+Thot he challenged Dan O'Hoolihan ter have a j'int debate.
+
+_Ho, ho! Begorra! Oi wisht that ye 'd been there!
+Ho, ho! Begorra! 'Twas lovely, Oi declare_;
+ _The langwudge, sure 't was iligant, the rhitoric was great_,
+_Whin Dan and Mack, they had ut back,
+ At our big j'int debate_.
+
+'T was in the War-r-d Athletic Club we had ut fixed ter hear 'em,
+And all the sates was crowded, fer the gang was there ter cheer 'em;
+A foine debatin' platfor-r-m had been built inside the ring,
+And iverybuddy said 't was jist the thing, jist the thing.
+O'Hoolihan, he shtarted off be sayin', ut was safe
+Ter say that aich ixpansionist was jist a murth'rin thafe;
+And, whin I saw big Mack turn rid, and shtart ter lave his sate,
+Oi knew we 'd have a gor-r-geous toime at our big j'int debate.
+
+Thin Moike he tuk his tur-r-n ter shpake, "Av Oi wance laid me hand,"
+Says he, "upon an 'Anti,' faith! Oi'd make his nose ixpand;
+Oi 'd face the schnakin' blackguar-r-d, and Oi'd baste him where he shtood.
+Oi'd annix him to a graveyard, so Oi would, so Oi would!"
+Thin up jumped Dan O'Hoolihan a-roar-r-in' out "Yez loie!"
+And flung his b'aver hat at Mack, and plunked him in the eye;
+And Moike he niver shtopped ter talk, but grappled wid him straight,
+And the ar-r-gymint got loively thin, at our big j'int debate.
+
+Oi niver in me loife have seen sich char-r-min' illycution,
+The gistures av thim wid their fists was grand in ixecution;
+We tried to be impar-r-tial, so no favoroite we made,
+But jist sicked them on tergither, yis indade, yis indade.
+And nayther wan was half convinced whin Sar-r-gint Leary came,
+Wid near a dozen other cops, and stopped the purty game;
+But niver did Oi see dhress-suits in sich a mortial state
+As thim the or-r-ators had on at our big j'int debate.
+
+_Ho, ho! Begorra! Oi wisht that ye'd been there!
+Ho, ho! Begorra! The foight was on the square_;
+ _Ter see the wagon goin' off, wid thim two on the sate_!--
+_Oi 'd loike ter shtroike, 'twixt Dan and Moilce_,
+ _Another j'int debate_.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+HIS NEW BROTHER
+
+Say, I've got a little brother,
+Never teased to have him, nuther,
+ But he's here;
+They just went ahead and bought him,
+And, last week the doctor brought him,
+ Wa'n't that queer?
+
+When I heard the news from Molly,
+Why, I thought at first 't was jolly,
+ 'Cause, you see,
+I s'posed I could go and get him
+And then Mama, course, would let him
+ Play with me.
+
+But when I had once looked at him,
+"Why!" I says, "My sakes, is _that_ him?
+ Just that mite!"
+They said, "Yes," and, "Ain't he cunnin'?"
+And I thought they must be funnin',--
+ He's a _sight!_
+
+[Illustration: "Why'd they buy a baby brother,
+When they know I'd _good_ deal ruther
+Have a dog?"]
+
+He's so small, it's just amazin',
+And you 'd think that he was blazin',
+ He's so red;
+And his nose is like a berry,
+And he's bald as Uncle Jerry
+ On his head.
+
+Why, he isn't worth a dollar!
+All he does is cry and holler
+ More and more;
+_Won't_ sit up--you can't arrange him,--
+_I_ don't see why Pa do'n't change him
+ At the store.
+
+Now we've got to dress and feed him,
+And we really didn't _need_ him
+ More 'n a frog;
+Why'd they buy a baby brother,
+When they know I'd _good_ deal ruther
+ Have a dog?
+
+ * * * * *
+
+CIRCLE DAY
+
+Me and Billy's in the woodshed; Ma said, "Run outdoors and play;
+Be good boys and don't be both'rin', till the company's gone away."
+She and sister Mary's hustlin', settin' out the things for tea,
+And the parlor's full of women, such a crowd you never see;
+Every one a-cuttin' patchwork or a-sewin' up a seam,
+And the way their tongues is goin', seems as if they went by steam.
+Me and Billy's been a-listenin' and, I tell you what, it beats
+Circus day to hear 'em gabbin', when the Sewin' Circle meets.
+
+First they almost had a squabble, fightin' 'bout the future life;
+When they'd settled that they started runnin' down the parson's wife.
+Then they got a-goin' roastin' all the folks there is in town,
+And they never stopped, you bet yer, till they'd done 'em good and brown.
+They knew everybody's business and they made it mighty free,
+But the way they loved _each other_ would have done yer good to see;
+Seems ter me the only way ter keep yer hist'ry off the streets
+Is to be on hand a-waitin' when the Sewin' Circle meets.
+
+Pretty quick they'll have their supper, then's the time to see the fun;
+Ma'll say the rolls is _awful_, and she's 'fraid the pie ain't done.
+Really everything is bully, and she knows it well enough,
+But the folks that's havin' comp'ny always talks that kind of stuff.
+That sets all the women goin', and they say, "How _can_ you make
+Such _delicious_ pies and biscuits, and such _lovely_ choc'late cake?"
+Me and Billy don't say nothin' when we pitches in and eats
+Up the things there is left over when the Sewin' Circle meets.
+
+I guess Pa do'n't like the Circle, 'cause he said ter Uncle Jim
+That there cacklin' hen convention was too peppery for _him_.
+And he'll say to Ma, "I'm sorry, but I've really got ter dodge
+Down t' the hall right after supper--there's a meetin' at the lodge."
+Ma'll say, "Yes, so I expected." Then a-speakin' kinder cold,
+"Seems ter me, I'd get a new one; that excuse is gettin' old!"
+Pa'll look sick, just like a feller when he finds you know he cheats,
+But he do'n't stay home, you bet yer, when the Sewin' Circle meets.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+SERMON TIME
+
+"Blessed are the poor in spirit": there, I'll just remember that,
+And I'll say it over 'n over, till I've got it good and pat,
+For when I get home from meetin', Gran'ma'll ask me for the text,
+And if I say I've forgot it, she'll be goin' for me next,
+Say in', I don't pay attention, and what _am_ I comin' to;
+Tellin' 'bout when _she_ was little, same as old folks always do.
+Say, I'll bet she didn't like it any better than the rest,
+Sittin' 'round all stiff and starchy, dressed up in your Sunday best.
+
+"Blessed are the poor"--I tell yer, some day I'll be clearin' out,
+Leavin' all this dressin' nonsense, 'cause I'm goin' ter be a scout,
+Same as "Deadwood Dick," a-killin' all the Injuns on the plains:
+_He_ do'n't comb his hair, you bet yer; no, nor wash, unless it rains.
+And bimeby I'll come home, bringin' loads of gold and di'mon' rings;
+My, won't all the boys be jealous when they see those kind of things!
+'N' I'll have a reputation, folks'll call me "Lariat Ben,"
+Gran'ma'll think I 'mount ter somethin', maybe, when she sees me then.
+
+"Blessed are the"--There's a blackbird, outside, sittin' on a limb,--
+Gosh! I wish it wasn't Sunday, p'raps I wouldn't go for him.
+Sis says stonin' birds is wicked, but she's got one on her hat,--
+S'pose that makes it right and proper, if yer kill 'em just for that.
+There's that dudey city feller, sittin' in the Deacon's pew.
+Needn't feel so big now, Smarty, just because your clothes are new;
+Me and Sam has rigged a hat line; when it's dark to-morrer night
+We'll just catch your shiny beaver and we'll send it out of sight.
+
+"Blessed are"--There's Mr. Wiggin sound asleep. I wish he'd snore.
+Cracky! Now he's been and done it, dropped his hymn-book on the floor.
+See how cross his wife is lookin'. Say, I bet they'll have a row;
+Pa said that she wore the breeches, but she's got a dress on now.
+There's Nell Baker with her uncle. Her 'n I don't speak at school,
+'Cause she wouldn't help a feller when I clean forgot the rule.
+Used to be my girl before that--Gee! what was that text about?
+"Blessed--blessed--blessed" something. I'll ask Sis when we get out.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"TAKIN' BOARDERS"
+
+_We'd_ never thought of takin' 'em,--'t was Mary Ann's idee,--
+Sence she got back from boardin'-school she's called herself "Maree"
+An' scattered city notions like a tom-cat sheds his fur.
+She thought our old melodeon wa'n't good enough fer her,
+An' them pianners cost so that she said the only way
+Was ter take in summer boarders till we 'd made enough to pay;
+So she wrote adver_tis_ements out to fetch 'em inter camp,
+An' now there's boarders thicker here than June bugs round a lamp.
+
+Our best front parlor'll jest be sp'iled; they h'ist up every shade
+An' open all the blinds, by gum! an' let the carpet fade.
+They're in there week days jest the same as Sunday; I declare,
+I really think our haircloth set is showin' signs o' wear!
+They set up ha'f the night an' sing,--no use ter try ter sleep,
+With them a-askin' folks ter "Dig a grave both wide an' deep,"
+An' "Who will smoke my mashum pipe?" By gee! I tell yer what:
+If they want me to dig their graves, I'd jest as soon as not!
+
+There ain't no comfort now at meals; I can't take off my coat,
+Nor use my knife to eat, nor tie my napkin 'round my throat,
+Nor drink out of my sasser. Gosh! I hardly draw my breath
+'Thout Mary Ann a-tellin' me she's "mortified to death!"
+Before they came our breakfast time was allus ha'f-past six;
+By thunderation! 't wouldn't do; you'd orter hear the kicks!
+So jest to suit 'em 't was put off till sometime arter eight,
+An' when a chap gits up at four that's mighty long ter wait.
+
+The idee was that Mary Ann would help her Ma; but, land!
+She can't be round a minute but some boarder's right on hand
+Ter take her out ter walk or ride--_she_ likes it well enough,
+But when you 're gittin' grub for twelve, Ma finds it kinder tough.
+We ain't a-sayin' nothin' now, we'll see this season through,
+But folks that bought one gold brick ain't in love with number two;
+An' if you're passin' down our way next summer, cast your eye
+At our front fence. You'll see a sign,
+ "NO BOARDERS NEED APPLY."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+A COLLEGE TRAINING
+
+Home from college came the stripling, calm and cool and debonair,
+With a weird array of raiment and a wondrous wealth of hair,
+With a lazy love of languor and a healthy hate of work
+And a cigarette devotion that would shame the turbaned Turk.
+And he called his father "Guv'nor," with a cheek serene and rude,
+While that raging, wrathful rustic calld his son a "blasted dude."
+And in dark and direful language muttered threats of coming harm
+To the "idle, shif'less critter" from his father's good right arm.
+
+And the trouble reached a climax on the lawn behind the shed,--
+"Now, I'm gon' ter lick yer, sonny," so the sturdy parent said,
+"And I'll knock the college nonsense from your noddle, mighty quick!"--
+Then he lit upon that chappy like a wagon-load of brick.
+But the youth serenely murmured, as he gripped his angry dad,
+"You're a clever rusher, Guv'nor, but you tackle very bad";
+And he rushed him through the center and he tripped him for a fall,
+And he scored a goal and touchdown with his papa as the ball.
+
+[Illustration: "That was jolly, Guv'nor. now we'll practice every day."]
+
+Then a cigarette he lighted, as he slowly strolled away,
+Saying, "That was jolly, Guv'nor, now we'll practice every day";
+While his father from the puddle, where he wallowed in disgrace,
+Smiled upon his offspring, proudly, from a bruised and battered face,
+And with difficulty rising, quick he hobbled to the house.
+"Henry's all right, Ma!" he shouted to his anxious, waiting spouse,
+"He jest licked me good and solid, and I tell yer, Mary Ann,
+When a chap kin lick _your husband_ he's a mighty able man!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+A CRUSHED HERO
+
+On a log behind the pigsty of a modest little farm,
+Sits a freckled youth and lanky, red of hair and long of arm;
+But his mien is proud and haughty and his brow is high and stern,
+And beneath their sandy lashes, fiery eyes with purpose burn.
+Bow before him, gentle reader, he's the hero we salute,
+He is Hiram Adoniram Andrew Jackson Shute.
+
+Search not Fame's immortal marbles, never there his name you'll find,
+For our hero, let us whisper, is a hero in his mind;
+And a youth may bathe in glory, wade in slaughter time on time,
+When a novel, wild and gory, may be purchased for a dime.
+And through reams of lurid pages has he slain the Sioux and Ute,
+Bloody Hiram Adoniram Andrew Jackson Shute.
+
+Hark, a heavy step advancing,--list, a father's angry cry,
+"He hain't shucked a single nubbin; where's that good-fer-nothin' Hi?"
+"Here, base catiff," comes the answer, "here am I who was your slave,
+But no more I'll do your shuckin', though I fill a bloody grave!
+Freedom's fire my breast has kindled; there'll be bloodshed, tyrant!
+ brute!"
+Quoth brave Hiram Adoniram Andrew Jackson Shute.
+
+"Breast's a-blazin', is it, Sonny?" asks his father with a smile,
+"Kind er like a stove, I reckon, what they call 'gas-burner' style.
+Good 'base-burner' 's what your needin'"--here he pins our hero fast,
+"Come, young man, we'll try the woodshed, keep the bloodshed till the
+ last."
+Then an atmosphere of horse-whip, interspersed with cow-hide boot,
+Wraps young Hiram Adoniram Andrew Jackson Shute.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+Weep ye now, oh, gentle reader, for the fallen, great of heart,
+As ye wept o'er Saint Helena and the exiled Bonaparte;
+For a picture, sad as that one, to your pity I would show
+Of a spirit crushed and broken,--of a hero lying low;
+For where husks are heaped the highest, working swiftly, hushed and mute,
+Shucketh Hiram Adoniram Andrew Jackson Shute.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+A THANKSGIVING DREAM
+
+I'm pretty nearly certain that't was 'bout two weeks ago,--
+It might be more, or, p'raps 't was less,--but, anyhow, I know
+'T was on the night I ate the four big saucers of ice cream
+That I dreamed jest the horriblest, most awful, _worstest_ dream.
+I dreamed that 'twas Thanksgiving and I saw our table laid
+With every kind of goody that, I guess, was ever made;
+With turkey, and with puddin', and with everything,--but, gee!
+'T was dreadful, 'cause they was alive, and set and looked at me.
+
+And then a great big gobbler, that was on a platter there,
+He stood up on his drumsticks, and he says, "You boy, take care!
+For if, Thanksgivin' Day, you taste my dark meat or my white,
+I'll creep up to your bedroom in the middle of the night;
+I'll throw off all the blankets, and I'll pull away the sheet,
+I'll prance and dance upon you with my prickly, tickly feet;
+I'll kick you, and I'll pick you, and I'll screech, 'Remember me!'
+Beware, my boy! Take care, my boy!" that gobbler says, says he.
+
+[Illustration: The Talking Turkey]
+
+And then a fat plum puddin' kind er grunted-like and said:
+"I'm round and hot and steamin', and I'm heavier than lead,
+And if you dare to eat me, boy, upon Thanksgivin' Day,
+I'll come at night and tease you in a frightful sort of way.
+I'll thump you, and I'll bump you, and I'll jump up high and fall
+Down on your little stomach like a sizzlin' cannon-ball
+I'll hound you, and I'll pound you, and I'll screech 'Remember me!'
+Beware, my boy! Take care, my boy!" that puddin says, says he.
+
+And then, soon as the puddin' stopped, a crusty ol' mince pie
+Jumped from its plate and glared at me and winked its little eye;
+"You boy," it says, "Thanksgivin' Day, don't dare ter touch a slice
+Of me, for if you do, I'll come and cramp you like a vise.
+I'll root you, and I'll boot you, and I'll twist you till you squeal,
+I'll stand on edge and roll around your stomach like a wheel;
+I'll hunch you, and I'll punch you, and I'll screech, 'Remember me!'"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+I don't know what came after that, 'cause I woke up, you see.
+
+You wouldn't b'lieve that talk like that one ever _could_ forget,
+But, say! ter-day's Thanksgivin,' and I've et, and et, and et!
+And when I'd stuffed jest all I could, I jumped and gave a scream,
+'Cause all at once, when 't was too late, I 'membered 'bout that dream.
+And now it's almost bedtime, and I ought ter say my prayers
+And tell the folks "good-night" and go a-pokin' off up-stairs;
+But, oh, my sakes! I dasn't, 'cause I know them things'll be
+All hidin' somewheres 'round my bed and layin there fer me.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+O'REILLY'S BILLY-GOAT
+
+A solemn Sabbath stillness lies along the Mudville lanes,
+Among the crags of Shantytown a peaceful quiet reigns,
+For down upon McCarty's dump, in fiery fight for fame,
+The Shanties meet the Mudvilles in the final pennant game;
+And heedless of the frantic fray, in center field remote,
+Behind the biggest ash-heap lies O'Reilly's billy-goat.
+
+The eager crowd bends forward now, in fierce excitement's thrall,
+The pitcher writhes in serpent twist, the umpire says, "Play ball!"
+The batsman swings with sudden spite,--a loud, resounding "spat,"
+And hissing through the ambient air the horse-hide leaves the bat;
+With one terrific battle-cry, the "rooter" clears his throat,
+But still serene in slumber lies O'Reilly's billy-goat.
+
+Alas, alas for Shantytown! the Mudvilles forge ahead;
+Alas for patriotic hopes! the green's below the red;
+With one half inning still to play the score is three to two,
+The Shantys have a man on base,--be brave my lads, and true;
+Bold Captain Muggsy comes to bat, a batsman he of note,
+And slowly o'er the ash-heap walks O'Reilly's billy-goat.
+
+The yelling Mudville hosts have wrecked his slumbers so serene,
+With deep disgust and sullen eye he gazes o'er the scene.
+He notes the center-fielder's garb, the Mudvilles' shirt of red;
+He firmly plants his sturdy legs, he bows his horned head,
+And, as upon his shaggy ears the Mudville slogan smote,
+A sneer played 'mid the whiskers of O'Reilly's billy-goat.
+
+The valiant Muggsy hits the ball. Oh, deep and dark despair!
+He hits it hard and straight, but ah, he hits it in the air!
+The Mudville center-fielder smiles and reaches forth in glee,
+He knows that fly's an easy out for such a man as he.
+Beware, oh rash and reckless youth, nor o'er your triumph gloat,
+For toward you like a comet flies O'Reilly's billy-goat.
+
+Across the battle-field is borne a dull and muffled sound,
+The fielder like a bullock falls, the ball rolls on the ground.
+Around the bases on the wing the gallant Muggsy speeds,
+And follows swiftly in the track where fast his comrade leads.
+And from the field of chaos where the dusty billows float,
+With calm, majestic mien there stalks O'Reilly's billy-goat.
+
+Above the crags of Shantytown the flaunting pennant waves,
+And cheering myriads chant the praise of Muggsy's lusty braves.
+The children shout in gladsome glee, each fair one waves her hand,
+As down the street the heroes march with lively German band;
+But wilder grows the tumult when, with ribboned horns and coat,
+They see, on high in triumph borne, O'Reilly's billy-goat.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE CUCKOO CLOCK
+
+When Ezry, that's my sister's son, come home from furrin parts,
+He fetched the folks a lot of things ter brighten up their hearts;
+He fetched 'em silks and gloves and clothes, and knick-knacks, too, a
+ stock,
+But all he fetched fer us was jest a fancy cuckoo clock.
+'T was all fixed up with paint and gilt, and had a little door
+Where sat the cutest little bird, and when 't was three or four
+Or five or six or any time, that bird would jest come out
+And, 'cordin' ter what time it was, he'd flap his wings and shout:
+ "_Hoo_-hoo! _Hoo_-hoo! _Hoo_-hoo!"
+
+Well, fust along we had it, why, I thought 'twas simply prime!
+And used to poke the hands around ter make it "cuckoo" time;
+And allers when we'd company come, they had ter see the thing,
+And, course they almost had a fit when "birdie" come ter sing.
+But, by and by, b'gosh! I found it somehow lost its joys,
+I found it kind er made me sick to hear that senseless noise;
+I wished 't was jest a common clock, that struck a gong, yer know,
+And didn't have no foolish bird ter flap his wings and go:
+ "_Hoo_-hoo! _Hoo_-hoo! _Hoo_-hoo!"
+
+Well, things git on from bad to wuss, until I'm free ter grant,
+I'd smash it into kindlin', but a present, so, I can't!
+And, though a member of the church, and deacon, I declare,
+That thing jest sets me up on end and makes me want ter swear!
+I try ter be religious and ter tread the narrer way,
+But seems as if that critter knew when I knelt down ter pray,
+And all my thoughts of heaven go a-tumblin' down ter,--well,
+A different kind of climate--when that bird sets out ter yell:
+ "_Hoo_-hoo! _Hoo_-hoo! _Hoo_-hoo!"
+
+I read once in a poetry book, that Ezry had ter home,
+The awful fuss a feller made about a crow, that come
+And pestered him about ter death and made him sick and sore,
+By settin' on his mantel-piece and hollerin' "Nevermore!"
+But, say, I'd ruther have the crow, with all his fuss and row,
+His bellerin' had _some_ sense, b'gosh! 'T was _English_, anyhow;
+And all the crows in Christendom that talked a Christian talk
+Would seem like nightingales, compared ter that air furrin squawk:
+ "_Hoo_-hoo! _Hoo_-hoo! _Hoo_-hoo!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE POPULAR SONG
+
+I never was naturally vicious;
+ My spirit was lamb-like and mild;
+I never was bad or malicious;
+ I loved with the trust of a child.
+But hate now my bosom is burning,
+ And all through my being I long
+To get one solid thump on the head of the chump
+ Who wrote the new popular song.
+
+[Illustration: "The washwoman sings it all wrong."]
+
+ The office-boy hums it,
+ The book-keeper drums it,
+ It's whistled by all on the street;
+ The hand-organ grinds it,
+ The music-box winds it,
+ It's sung by the "cop" on the beat.
+ The newsboy, he spouts it,
+ The bootblack, he shouts it,
+ The washwoman sings it all wrong;
+ And I laugh, and I weep,
+ And I wake, and I sleep,
+ To the tune of that popular song.
+
+Its measures are haunting my dreaming;
+ I rise at the breakfast-bell's call
+To hear the new chambermaid screaming
+ The chorus aloud through the hall.
+The landlady's daughter's piano
+ Is helping the concert along,
+And my molars I break on the tenderloin steak
+ As I chew to that popular song.
+
+ The orchestra plays it,
+ The German band brays it,
+ 'T is sung on the platform and stage;
+ All over the city
+ They're chanting the ditty;
+ At summer resorts it's the rage.
+ The drum corps, it beats it,
+ The echo repeats it,
+ The bass-drummer brings it out strong,
+ And we speak, and we talk,
+ And we dance, and we walk,
+ To the notes of that popular song.
+
+It really is driving me crazy;
+ I feel that I'm wasting away;
+My brain is becoming more hazy,
+ My appetite less every day.
+But, ah! I'd not pray for existence,
+ Nor struggle my life to prolong,
+If, up some dark alley, with him I might dally
+ Who wrote that new popular song.
+
+ The bone-player clicks it,
+ The banjoist picks it,
+ It 'livens the clog-dancer's heels;
+ The bass-viol moans it,
+ The bagpiper drones it,
+ They play it for waltzes and reels.
+ I shall not mind quitting
+ The earthly, and flitting
+ Away 'mid the heavenly throng,
+ If the mourners who come
+ To my grave do not hum
+ That horrible popular song.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+MATILDY'S BEAU
+
+I hain't no great detective, like yer read about,--the kind
+That solves a whole blame murder case by footmarks left behind;
+But then, again, on t'other hand, my eyes hain't shut so tight
+But I can add up two and two and get the answer right;
+So, when prayer-meet'ns, Friday nights, got keepin' awful late,
+And, fer an hour or so, I'd hear low voices at the gate--
+And when that gate got saggin' down 'bout ha'f a foot er so--
+I says ter mother: "Ma," says I, "Matildy's got a beau."
+
+[Illustration: Matildy's Beau]
+
+We ought ter have expected it--she's 'most eighteen, yer see;
+But, sakes alive! she's always seemed a baby, like, ter me;
+And so, a feller after _her_! why, that jest did beat all!
+But, t' other Sunday, bless yer soul, he come around ter call;
+And when I see him all dressed up as dandy as yer please,
+But sort er lookin' 's if he had the shivers in his knees,
+I kind er realized it then, yer might say, like a blow--
+Thinks I, "No use! I'm gittin' old; Matildy's got a beau."
+
+Just twenty-four short years gone by--it do'n't seem five, I vow!--
+I fust called on Matildy--that's Matildy's mother now;
+I recollect I spent an hour a-tyin' my cravat,
+And I'd sent up ter town and bought a bang-up shiny hat.
+And, my! oh, my! them new plaid pants; well, wa'n't I something grand
+When I come up the walk with some fresh posies in my hand?
+And didn't I feel like a fool when her young brother, Joe,
+Sang out: "Gee crickets! Looky here! Here comes Matildy's beau!"
+
+And now another feller comes up _my_ walk, jest as gay,
+And here's Matildy blushin' red in jest her mother's way;
+And when she says she's got ter go an errand to the store,
+We know _he_ 's waitin' 'round the bend, jest as I've done afore;
+Or, when they're in the parlor and I knock, why, bless yer heart!
+I have ter smile ter hear how quick their chairs are shoved apart.
+They think us old folks don't "catch on" a single mite; but, sho!
+I reckon they fergit I was Matildy's mother's beau.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"SISTER'S BEST FELLER"
+
+My sister's best feller is 'most six-foot-three,
+And handsome and strong as a feller can be;
+And Sis, she's so little, and slender, and small,
+You never would think she could boss him at all;
+ But, my jing!
+ She do'n't do a thing
+ But make him jump 'round, like he worked with a string!
+It jest makes me 'shamed of him sometimes, you know,
+To think that he'll let a girl bully him so.
+
+He goes to walk with her and carries her muff
+And coat and umbrella, and that kind of stuff;
+She loads him with things that must weigh 'most a ton;
+And, honest, he _likes_ it,--as if it was fun!
+ And, oh, say!
+ When they go to a play,
+ He'll sit in the parlor and fidget away,
+And she won't come down till it's quarter past eight,
+And then she'll scold _him_ 'cause they get there so late.
+
+He spends heaps of money a-buyin' her things,
+Like candy, and flowers, and presents, and rings;
+And all he's got for 'em 's a handkerchief case--
+A fussed-up concern, made of ribbons and lace;
+ But, my land!
+ He thinks it's just grand,
+ "'Cause she made it," he says, "with her own little hand";
+He calls her "an angel"--I heard him--and "saint,"
+And "beautif'lest bein' on earth"--but she ain't.
+
+'Fore _I_ go an errand for her any time
+I jest make her coax me, and give me a dime;
+But that great, big silly--why, honest and true--
+He'd run forty miles if she wanted him to.
+ Oh, gee whiz!
+ I tell you what 'tis!
+ I jest think it's _awful_--those actions of his.
+_I_ won't fall in love, when I'm grown--no sir-ee!
+My sister's best feller's a warnin' to me!
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"THE WIDDER CLARK"
+
+It's getting on ter winter now, the nights are crisp and chill,
+The wind comes down the chimbly with a whistle sharp and shrill,
+The dead leaves rasp and rustle in the corner by the shed,
+And the branches scratch and rattle on the skylight overhead.
+The cracklin' blaze is climbin' up around the old backlog,
+As we set by the fireplace here, myself and cat and dog;
+And as fer me, I'm thinkin', as the fire burns clear and bright,
+That it must be mighty lonesome fer the Widder Clark ter-night.
+
+It's bad enough fer me, b'gosh, a-pokin' round the place,
+With jest these two dumb critters here, and nary human face
+To make the house a home agin, same as it used ter be
+While mother lived, for she was 'bout the hull wide world ter me.
+My bein' all the son she had, we loved each other more--
+That's why, I guess, I'm what they call a "bach" at forty-four.
+It's hard fer _me_ to set alone, but women folks--'t ain't right,
+And it must be mighty lonesome fer the Widder Clark ter-night.
+
+I see her t' other mornin', and, I swan, 't wa'n't later 'n six,
+And there she was, out in the cold, a-choppin' up the sticks
+To kindle fire fer breakfast, and she smiled so bright and gay,
+By gee, I simply couldn't bear ter see her work that way!
+Well, I went in and chopped, I guess, enough ter last a year,
+And she said "Thanks," so pretty, gosh! it done me good ter hear!
+She do'n't look over twenty-five, no, not a single mite;
+Ah, hum! it must be lonesome fer the Widder Clark ter-night.
+
+I sez ter her, "Our breakfasts ain't much fun fer me or you;
+Seems's if two lonesome meals might make one social one fer two."
+She blushed so red that I did, too, and I got sorter 'fraid
+That she was mad, and, like a fool, come home; I wish I'd stayed!
+I'd like ter know, now, if she thinks that Clark's a pretty name--
+'Cause, if she do'n't, and fancies mine, we'll make 'em both the same.
+I think I'll go and ask her, 'cause 't would ease my mind a sight
+Ter know 't wa'n't quite so lonesome fer the Widder Clark ter-night.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+FRIDAY EVENING MEETINGS
+
+Oh, the Friday evening meetings in the vestry, long ago,
+When the prayers were long and fervent and the anthems staid and slow,
+Where the creed was like the pewbacks, of a pattern straight and stiff,
+And the congregation took it with no doubting "but" or "if,"
+Where the girls sat, fresh and blooming, with the old folks down before,
+And the boys, who came in later, took the benches near the door.
+
+Oh, the Friday evening meetings, how the ransomed sinners told
+Of their weary toils and trials ere they reached the blessed fold;
+How we trembled when the Deacon, with a saintly relish, spoke
+Of the fiery place of torment till we seemed to smell the smoke;
+And we all joined in "Old Hundred" till the rafters seemed to ring
+When the preacher said, "Now, brethren: Hallelujah! Let us sing."
+
+Oh, the Friday evening meetings, and the waiting 'round about,
+'Neath the lamplight, at the portal, just to see when _she_ came out,
+And the whispered, anxious question, and the faintly murmured "Yes,"
+And the soft hand on your coat-sleeve, and the perfumed, rustling dress,--
+Oh, the Paradise of Heaven somehow seemed to show its worth
+When you walked home with an angel through a Paradise on earth.
+
+Oh, the Friday evening meetings, and the happy homeward stroll,
+While the moonlight softly mingled with the love-light in your soul;
+Then the lingering 'neath the lattice where the roses hung above,
+And the "good-night" kiss at parting, and the whispered word of love,--
+Ah, they lighted Life's dark highway with a sweet and sacred glow
+From the Friday evening meetings in the vestry, long ago.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE PARSON'S DAUGHTER
+
+Little foot, whose lightest pat
+Seems to glorify the mat,
+Waving hair and picture hat,
+ Grace the nymphs have taught her;
+Gown the pink of fit and style,
+Lips that ravish when they smile,--
+Like a vision, down the aisle
+ Comes the parson's daughter.
+
+As she passes, like a dart
+To each luckless fellow's heart
+Leaps a throbbing thrill and smart,
+ When his eye has sought her;
+Tries he then his sight to bless
+With one glimpse of face or tress--
+Does she know it?--well, I guess!
+ Parson's pretty daughter.
+
+Leans she now upon her glove
+Cheeks whose dimples tempt to love,
+And, with saintly look above,
+ Hears her "Pa" exhort her;
+But, within those upturned eyes,
+Fair as sunny summer skies,
+Just a hint of mischief lies,--
+ Parson's roguish daughter.
+
+From their azure depths askance,
+When the hymn-book gave the chance,
+Did I get one laughing glance?
+ I was sure I caught her.
+Are her thoughts so far amiss
+As to stray, like mine, to bliss?
+For, last night, I stole a kiss
+ From the parson's daughter.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+[Illustration: man feeding horse]
+
+MY OLD GRAY NAG
+
+When the farm work's done, at the set of sun,
+ And the supper's cleared away,
+And Ma, she sits on the porch and knits,
+ And Dad, he puffs his clay;
+Then out I go ter the barn, yer know,
+ With never a word ner sign,
+In the twilight dim I harness him--
+ That old gray nag of mine.
+
+He's used ter me, and he knows, yer see,
+ Down jest which lane ter turn;
+Fact is--well, yes--he's been, I guess,
+ Quite times enough ter learn;
+And he knows the hedge by the brook's damp edge,
+ Where the twinklin' fireflies shine,
+And he knows who waits by the pastur' gates--
+ That old gray nag of mine.
+
+So he stops, yer see, fer he thinks, like me,
+ That a buggy's made fer two;
+Then along the lane, with a lazy rein,
+ He jogs in the shinin' dew;
+And he do'n't fergit he can loaf a bit
+ In the shade of the birch and pine;
+Oh, he knows his road, and he knows his load--
+ That old gray nag of mine.
+
+No, he ain't the sort that the big-bugs sport,
+ Docked up in the latest style,
+But he suits us two, clean through and through,
+ And, after a little while,
+When the cash I've saved brings the home we've craved,
+ So snug, and our own design,
+He'll take us straight ter the parson's gate--
+ That old gray nag of mine.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THROUGH THE FOG
+
+The fog was so thick yer could cut it
+ 'Thout reachin' a foot over-side,
+The dory she'd nose up ter butt it,
+ And then git discouraged an' slide;
+No noise but the thole-pins a-squeakin',
+ Or, maybe, the swash of a wave,
+No feller ter cheer yer by speakin'--
+ 'Twas lonesomer, lots, than the grave.
+
+I set there an' thought of my trouble,
+ I thought how I'd worked fer the cash
+That bust and went up like a bubble
+ The day that the bank went ter smash.
+I thought how the fishin' was failin',
+ How little this season I'd made,
+I thought of the child that was ailin',
+ I thought of the bills ter be paid.
+
+"And," says I, "All my life I've been fightin'
+ Through oceans of nothin' but fog;
+And never no harbor a-sightin'--
+ Jest driftin' around like a log;
+No matter how sharp I'm a-spyin',
+ I never see nothin' ahead:
+I'm sick and disgusted with tryin'--
+ I jest wish ter God I was dead."
+
+It wa'n't more'n a minute, I'm certain,
+ The words was jest out er my mouth,
+When up went the fog, like a curtain,
+ And "puff" came the breeze from the south;
+And 'bout a mile off, by rough guessin',
+ I see my own shanty on shore,
+And Mary, my wife and my blessin',
+ God keep her, she stood in the door.
+
+And I says ter myself, "I'm a darlin';
+ A chap with a woman like that,
+To set here a-grumblin' and snarlin',
+ As sour as a sulky young brat--
+I'd better jest keep my helm steady,
+ And not mind the fog that's adrift,
+For when the Lord gits good and ready,
+ I reckon it's certain ter lift."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE BALLADE OF THE DREAM-SHIP
+
+My dream-ship's decks are of beaten gold,
+ And her fluttering banners are brave of hue,
+And her shining sails are of satin fold,
+ And her tall sides gleam where the warm waves woo:
+ While the flung spray leaps in a diamond dew
+From her bright bow, dipping its dance of glee;
+ For the skies are fair and the soft winds coo,
+Where my dream-ship sails o'er the silver sea.
+
+My dream-ship's journeys are long and bold,
+ And the ports she visits are far and few;
+They lie by the rosy shores of old,
+ 'Mid the dear lost scenes my boyhood knew;
+ Or, deep in the future's misty blue,
+By the purple islands of Arcady,--
+ And Spain's fair turrets shine full in view,
+Where my dream-ship sails o'er the silver sea.
+
+My dream-ship's cargo is wealth untold,
+ Rare blooms that the old home gardens grew,
+Sweet pictured faces, and loved songs trolled
+ By lips long laid 'neath the churchyard yew;
+ Or wondrous wishes not yet come true,
+And fame and glory that is to be;--
+ Hope holds the wheel all the lone watch through,
+Where my dream-ship sails o'er the silver sea.
+
+ENVOY
+
+Heart's dearest, what though the storms may brew,
+ And earth's ways darken for you and me?
+The breeze is fair--let us voyage anew,
+ Where my dream-ship sails o'er the silver sea.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+LIFE'S PATHS
+
+It's A wonderful world we're in, my dear,
+ A wonderful world, they say,
+And blest they be who may wander free
+ Wherever a wish may stray;
+Who spread their sails to the arctic gales,
+ Or bask in the tropic's bowers,
+While we must keep to the foot-path steep
+ In this workaday life of ours.
+
+For smooth is the road for the few, my dear,
+ And wide are the ways they roam:
+Our feet are led where the millions tread,
+ In the worn, old lanes of home.
+And the years may flow for weal or woe,
+ And the frost may follow the flowers,
+Our steps are bound to the self-same round
+ In this workaday life of ours.
+
+But narrow our path may be, my dear,
+ And simple the scenes we view,
+A heart like thine, and a love like mine,
+ Will carry us bravely through.
+With a happy song we'll trudge along,
+ And smile in the shine or showers,
+And we'll ease the pack on a brother's back
+ By this workaday life of ours.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE MAYFLOWER
+
+In the gleam and gloom of the April weather,
+ When the snows have flown in the brooklet's flood,
+And the Showers and Sunshine sport together,
+ And the proud Bough boasts of the baby Bud;
+On the hillside brown, where the dead leaves linger
+ In crackling layers, all crimped and curled,
+She parts their folds with a timid finger,
+ And shyly peeps at the waking world.
+
+The roystering West Wind flies to greet her,
+ And bids her haste, with a gleeful shout:
+The quickening Saplings bend to meet her,
+ And the first green Grass-blades call, "Come out!"
+So, venturing forth with a dainty neatness,
+ In gown of pink or in white arrayed,
+She comes once more in her fresh completeness,
+ A modest, fair little Pilgrim Maid.
+
+Her fragrant petals, their beauties showing,
+ Creep out to sprinkle the hill and dell,
+Like showers of Stars in the shadows glowing,
+ Or Snowflakes blossoming where they fell;
+And the charmed Wood leaps into joyous blooming,
+ As though't were touched by a Fairy's ring,
+And the glad Earth scents, in the rare perfuming,
+ The first sweet breath of the new-born Spring.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+MAY MEMORIES
+
+ To my office window, gray,
+ Come the sunbeams in their play,
+Come the dancing, glancing sunbeams, airy fairies of the May;
+ Like a breath of summer-time,
+ Setting Memory's bells a-chime,
+Till their jingle seems to mingle with the measure of my rhyme.
+
+ And above the tramp of feet,
+ And the clamor of the street,
+I can hear the thrush's singing, ringing high and clear and sweet,--
+ Hear the murmur of the breeze
+ Through the bloom-starred apple trees,
+And the ripples softly splashing and the dashing of the seas;
+
+ See the shadow and the shine
+ Where the glossy branches twine,
+And the ocean's sleepy tuning mocks the crooning in the pine;
+ Hear the catbird whistle shrill
+ In the bushes by the rill,
+Where the violets toss and twinkle as they sprinkle vale and hill;
+
+ Feel the tangled meadow-grass
+ On my bare feet as I pass;
+See the clover bending over in a dew-bespangled mass;
+ See the cottage by the shore,
+ With the pansy beds before,
+And the old familiar places and the faces at the door.
+
+[Illustration]
+
+ Oh, the skies of blissful blue,
+ Oh, the woodland's verdant hue,--
+Oh, the lazy days of boyhood, when the world was fair and new!
+ Still to me your tale is told
+ In the summer's sunbeam's gold,
+And my truant fancy straying, goes a-Maying as of old.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+BIRDS'-NESTING TIME
+
+The spring sun flashes a rapier thrust
+ Through the dingy school-house pane,
+A shining scimitar, free from rust,
+That cuts the cloud of the drifting dust,
+ And scatters a golden rain;
+And the boy at the battered desk within
+ Is dreaming a dream sublime,
+For study's a wrong, and school a sin,
+When the joys of woods and fields begin,
+ And it's just birds'-nesting time.
+
+He dreams of a nook by the world unguessed,
+ Where the thrush's song is sung,
+And the dainty yellowbird's fairy nest,
+Lined with the fluff from the cattail's crest,
+ 'Mid the juniper boughs is hung;
+And further on, by the elder hedge,
+ Where the turtles come out to sleep,
+The marsh-hen builds, by the brooklet's edge,
+Her warm, wet home in the swampy sedge,
+ 'Mid the shadows so dark and deep.
+
+He knows of the spot by the old stone wall,
+ Where the sunlight dapples the glade,
+And the sweet wild-cherry blooms softly fall,
+And hid in the meadow-grass rank and tall,
+ The "Bob-white's" eggs are laid.
+He knows, where the sea-breeze sobs and sings,
+ And the sand-hills meet the brine,
+The clamorous crows, with their whirring wings,
+Tell of their treasure that sways and swings
+ In the top of the tasselled pine.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+And so he dreamed, with a happy face,
+ Till the noontide recess came,
+And when't was over, ah, sad disgrace,
+The teacher, seeing an empty place,
+ Marked "truant" against his name;
+While he, forgetful of book or rule,
+ Sought only a tree to climb:
+For where is the boy who remembers school
+When the cowslip blows by the marshy
+ And it's just birds'-nesting time?
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE OLD SWORD ON THE WALL
+
+ Where the warm spring sunlight, streaming
+ Through the window, sets its gleaming,
+With a softened silver sparkle in the dim and dusky hall,
+ With its tassel torn and tattered,
+ And its blade, deep-bruised and battered,
+Like a veteran, scarred and weary, hangs the old sword on the wall.
+
+ None can tell its stirring story,
+ None can sing its deeds of glory,
+None can say which cause it struck for, or from what limp hand it fell;
+ On the battle-field they found it,
+ Where the dead lay thick around it--
+Friend and foe--a gory tangle--tossed and torn by shot and shell.
+
+ Who, I wonder, was its wearer,
+ Was its stricken soldier bearer?
+Was he some proud Southern stripling, tall and straight and brave and true?
+ Dusky locks and lashes had he?
+ Or was he some Northern laddie,
+Fresh and fair, with cheeks of roses, and with eyes and coat of blue?
+
+ From New England's fields of daisies,
+ Or from Dixie's bowered mazes,
+Rode he proudly forth to conflict? What, I wonder, was his name?
+ Did some sister, wife, or mother,
+ Mourn a husband, son, or brother?
+Did some sweetheart look with longing for a love who never came?
+
+ Fruitless question! Fate forever
+ Keeps its secret, answering never.
+But the grim old blade shall blossom on this mild Memorial Day;
+ I will wreathe its hilt with roses
+ For the soldier who reposes
+Somewhere 'neath the Southern grasses in his garb of blue or gray.
+
+ May the flowers be fair above him,
+ May the bright buds bend and love him,
+May his sleep be deep and dreamless till the last great bugle-call;
+ And may North and South be nearer
+ To each other's heart, and dearer,
+For the memory of their heroes and the old swords on the wall.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+NINETY-EIGHT IN THE SHADE
+
+Pavements a-frying in street and in square,
+Never a breeze in the blistering air,
+Never a place where a fellow can run
+Out of the shine of the sizzling sun:
+"General Humidity" having his way,
+Killing us off by the hundred a day;
+Mercury climbing the tube like a shot,--
+Suffering Caesar! I tell you it's hot!
+
+Collar kerflummoxed all over my neck,
+Necktie and bosom and wristbands a wreck,
+Handkerchief dripping and worn to a shred
+Mopping and scouring my face and my head;
+Simply ablaze from my head to my feet,
+Back all afire with the prickles of heat,--
+Not on my cuticle one easy spot,--
+Jiminy Moses! I tell you it's _hot_!
+
+Give me a fan and a seat in the shade,
+Bring me a bucket of iced lemonade;
+Dress me in naught but the thinnest of clothes,
+Start up the windmill and turn on the hose:
+Set me afloat from my toes to my chin,
+Open the ice-box and fasten me in,--
+If it should freeze me, why, that matters not,--
+Brimstone and blazes! I tell you it's HOT!
+
+ * * * * *
+
+[Illustration: "Collar kerflummoxed all over my neck."]
+
+SUMMER NIGHTS AT GRANDPA'S
+
+Summer nights at Grandpa's--ain't they soft and still!
+Just the curtains rustlin' on the window-sill,
+And the wind a-blowin', warm and wet and sweet--
+Smellin' like the meadows or the fields of wheat;
+Just the bullfrogs pipin' in amongst the grass,
+Where the water's shinin' like a lookin'-glass;
+Just a dog a-barkin' somewheres up along,
+So far off his yelpin' 's like a kind of song.
+
+Summer nights at Grandpa's--hear the crickets sing,
+And the water bubblin' down beside the spring;
+Hear the cattle chewin' fodder in the shed,
+And an owl a-hootin' high up overhead;
+Hear the "way-off noises," faint and awful far--
+So mixed-up a feller do'n't know what they are--
+But so sort er lazy that they seem ter keep
+Sayin' over 'n' over, "Sonny, go ter sleep."
+
+Summer nights at Grandpa's--ain't it fun ter lay
+In the early mornin' when it's gettin' day--
+When the sun is risin' and it's fresh and cool,
+And you 're feelin' happy coz there ain't no school?--
+When you hear the crowin' as the rooster wakes,
+And you think of breakfast and the buckwheat cakes;
+Sleepin' in the city's too much fuss and noise;
+Summer nights at Grandpa's are the things for boys.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+GRANDFATHER'S "SUMMER SWEETS"
+
+Grandfather's "summer sweets" are ripe.
+ Out on the gnarled old tree,
+Out where the robin redbreasts pipe,
+ And buzzes the bumblebee;
+Swinging high on the bending bough,
+ Scenting the lazy breeze,
+What is the gods' ambrosia now
+ To apples of gold like these?
+
+Ruddy the blush of their maiden cheeks
+ After the sunbeam's kiss--
+Every quivering leaflet speaks,
+ Telling a tale of bliss;
+Telling of dainties hung about,
+ Each in a verdant wreath,
+Shimmering satin all without,
+ Honey and cream beneath.
+
+Would ye haste to the banquet rare,
+ Taste of the feast sublime?
+Brush from the brow the lines of care,
+ Scoff at the touch of Time?
+Come in the glow of the olden days,
+ Come with a youthful face,
+Come through the old familiar ways,
+ Up from the dear, old place.
+
+Barefoot, trip through the meadow lane,
+ Laughing at bruise and scratch;
+Come, with your hands all rich with stain
+ Fresh from the blackberry patch;
+Come where the orchard spreads its store
+ And the breath of the clover greets;
+Quick! they are waiting you here once more,--
+ Grandfather's "summer sweets."
+
+Grandfather's "summer sweets" are ripe,
+ Out on the gnarled, old tree--
+Out where the robin redbreasts pipe,
+ And buzzes the bumblebee;
+Swinging high on the bending bough,
+ Scenting the lazy breeze,
+What is the gods' ambrosia now
+ To apples of gold like these?
+
+ * * * * *
+
+MIDSUMMER
+
+Sun like a furnace hung up overhead,
+Burnin' and blazin' and blisterin' red;
+Sky like an ocean, so blue and so deep,
+One little cloud-ship becalmed and asleep;
+Breezes all gone and the leaves hangin' still,
+Shimmer of heat on the medder and hill,--Labor
+and laziness callin' to me:
+"Hoe or the fishin'-pole--which'll it be?"
+
+There's the old cornfield out there in the sun,
+Showin' so plain that there's work ter be done;
+There's the mean weeds with their tops all a-sprout,
+Seemin' ter stump me ter come clean 'em out;
+But, there's the river, so clear and so cool,
+There's the white lilies afloat on the pool,
+Scentin' the shade 'neath the old maple tree--
+"Hoe or the fishin'-pole--which'll it be?"
+
+Dusty and dry droops the corn in the heat,
+Down by the river a robin sings sweet,
+Gray squirrels chatter as if they might say:
+"Who's the chump talkin' of _workin_' to-day?"
+Robin's song tells how the pickerel wait
+Under the lily-pads, hungry for bait;
+I ought ter make for that cornfield, I know:
+But, "Where's the fishin'-pole? Hang the old hoe!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"SEPTEMBER MORNIN'S"
+
+Oh, the cool September mornin's! now they're with us once agin,
+With the grasses wet and shinin', and the air so clear and thin,
+When the cheery face of Natur' seems ter want ter let yer know
+That she's done with lazy summer and is brimmin' full of "go";
+When yer hear the cattle callin' and the hens a-singin' out,
+And the pigeons happy cooin' as they flutter 'round about,
+And there's snap and fire and sparkle in the way a feller feels,
+Till he fairly wants ter holler and ter jump and crack his heels.
+
+There's a ringin', singin' gladness in the tunes the blackbirds pipe
+When they're tellin' from the pear-tree that the Bartletts's nigh ter ripe;
+There's a kind of jolly fatness where the Baldwin apples shine,
+And the juicy Concord clusters are a-purplin' on the vine;
+And the cornstalks, turnin' yaller and a-crinklin' up their leaves,
+Look as if they kind er hankered ter be bundled inter sheaves;
+And there's beamin', streamin' brightness jest a-gildin' all the place,
+And yer somehow seem ter feel it in yer heart and in yer face.
+
+Now the crowd of cranb'r'y pickers, every mornin' as they pass,
+Makes a feller think of turkey, with the usual kind of sass,
+Till a roguish face a-smilin' 'neath a bunnit or a hat,
+Makes him stop and think of somethin' that's a good deal sweeter 'n that;
+And the lightsome girlish figger trippin', skippin' down the lane,
+Kills his mem'ry full of sunshine, but it's sunshine mixed with rain,--
+For, yer see, it sets him dreamin' of Septembers that he knew
+When _he_ went a cranb'r'y pickin' and a girl went with him, too.
+
+Oh, the cool September mornin's, why, their freshness seems ter roll
+Like a wave of life a-liftin' up yer everlastin' soul,
+And the earth and all that's on it seems a-bustin' inter rhyme
+So's ter sing a big thanksgivin' fer the comin' harvest-time;
+And I want ter jine the chorus and ter tell 'em fur and near
+That I hain't got wealth nor beauty, but I'm mighty glad I'm here;
+That I'm getting old and wrinkled, like the husks around the corn,
+But my heart is all the sweeter on a bright September morn.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+[Illustration: boy looking at a turkey]
+
+NOVEMBER'S COME
+
+Hey, you swelled-up turkey feller!
+ Struttin' round so big and proud.
+Pretty quick I guess your beller
+ Won't be goin' quite so loud.
+Say, I'd run and hide, I bet you,
+ And I'd leave off eatin' some,
+Else the choppin'-block'll get you,--
+ Don't you know November's come?
+
+Don't you know that Grandma's makin'
+ Loads of mince and pun'kin pies?
+Don't you smell those goodies cookin'?
+ Can't you see 'em? Where's your eyes?
+Tell that rooster there that's crowin',
+ Cute folks now are keepin' mum;
+_They_ don't show how fat they 're growin'
+ When they know November's come.
+
+'Member when you tried ter lick me?
+ Yes, you did, and hurt me, too!
+Thought't was big ter chase and pick me,--
+ Well, I'll soon be pickin' you.
+Oh, I know you 're big and hearty,
+ So you needn't strut and drum,--
+Better make your will out, smarty,
+ 'Cause, you know, November's come.
+
+"Gobble! gobble!" oh, no matter!
+ Pretty quick you'll change your tune;
+You'll be dead and in a platter,
+ And _I'll_ gobble pretty soon.
+'F I was you I'd stop my puffin',
+ And I'd look most awful glum;--
+Hope they give you lots of stuffin'!
+ _Ain't_ you glad November's come?
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE WINTER NIGHTS AT HOME
+
+A stretch of hill and valley, swathed thick in robes of white,
+The buildings blots of blackness, the windows gems of light,
+A moon, now clear, now hidden, as in its headlong race
+The north wind drags the cloud-wrack in tatters o'er its face;
+Mailed twigs that click and clatter upon the tossing tree,
+And, like a giant's chanting, the deep voice of the sea,
+As 'mid the stranded ice-cakes the bursting breakers foam,--
+The old familiar picture--a winter night at home.
+
+The old familiar picture--the firelight rich and red,
+The lamplight soft and mellow, the shadowed beams o'erhead;
+And father with his paper, and mother, calm and sweet,
+Mending the red yarn stockings stubbed through by careless feet.
+The little attic bedroom, the window 'neath the eaves,
+Decked by the Frost King's brushes with silvered sprays and leaves;
+The rattling sash which gossips with idle gusts that roam
+About the ice-fringed gables--the winter nights at home.
+
+What would I give to climb them--those narrow stairs so steep,--
+And reach that little chamber, and sleep a boy's sweet sleep!
+What would I give to view it--that old house by the sea--
+Filled with the dear lost faces which made it home for me!
+The sobbing wind sings softly the song of long ago,
+And in that country churchyard the graves are draped in snow;
+But there, beyond the arches of Heaven's star-jeweled dome,
+Perhaps they know I'm dreaming of winter nights at home.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"THE LITTLE FELLER'S STOCKIN'"
+
+O, it's Christmas Eve, and moonlight, and the Christmas air is chill,
+And the frosty Christmas holly shines and sparkles on the hill,
+And the Christmas sleigh-bells jingle and the Christmas laughter rings,
+As the last stray shoppers hurry, takin' home the Christmas things;
+And up yonder in the attic there's a little trundle bed
+Where there's Christmas dreams a-dancin' through a sleepy, curly head;
+And it's "Merry Christmas," Mary, once agin fer me and you,
+With the little feller's stockin' hangin' up beside the flue.
+
+'Tisn't silk, that little stockin', and it isn't much fer show,
+And the darns are pretty plenty 'round about the heel and toe,
+And the color's kind er faded, and it's sort er worn and old,
+But it really is surprisin' what a lot of love 'twill hold;
+And the little hand that hung it by the chimney there along
+Has a grip upon our heartstrings that is mighty firm and strong;
+So old Santy won't fergit it, though it isn't fine and new,--
+That plain little worsted stockin' hangin' up beside the flue.
+
+And the crops may fail and leave us with our plans all knocked ter smash,
+And the mortgage may hang heavy, and the bills use up the cash,
+But whenever comes the season, jest so long's we've got a dime,
+There'll be somethin' in that stockin'--won't there, Mary?--every time.
+And if in amongst our sunshine there's a shower or two of rain,
+Why, we'll face it bravely smilin', and we'll try not ter complain,
+Long as Christmas comes and finds us here together, me and you,
+With the little feller's stockin' hangin' up beside the flue.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+[Illustration]
+
+THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER
+
+You know the story--it's centuries old--
+How the Ant and the Grasshopper met, we're told,
+On a blustering day, when the wind was cold
+ And the trees were bare and brown;
+And the Grasshopper, being a careless blade,
+Who all the summer had danced and played,
+Now came to the rich old Ant for aid,
+ And the latter "turned him down."
+
+It's only fancy, but I suppose
+That the Grasshopper wore his summer clothes,
+And stood there kicking his frozen toes
+ And shaking his bones apart;
+And the Ant, with a sealskin coat and hat,
+Commanded the Grasshopper, brusque and flat,
+To "Dance through the winter," and things like that,
+ Which he thought were "cute" and "smart."
+
+But, mind you, the Ant, all summer long,
+Had heard the Grasshopper's merry song,
+And had laughed with the rest of the happy throng
+ At the bubbling notes of glee;
+And he said to himself, as his cash he lent,
+Or started out to collect his rent,
+"The shif'less fool do'n't charge a cent,--
+ I'm getting the whole show free."
+
+I've never been told how the pair came out--
+The Grasshopper starved to death, no doubt,
+And the Ant grew richer, and had the gout,
+ As most of his brethren do;
+I know that it's better to save one's pelf,
+And the Ant is considered a wise old elf,
+But I like the Grasshopper more myself,--
+ Though that is between we two.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE CROAKER
+
+Once, by the edge of a pleasant pool,
+Under the bank, where 't was dark and cool,
+Where bushes over the water hung,
+And grasses nodded and rushes swung--
+Just where the brook flowed out of the bog--
+There lived a gouty and mean old Frog,
+Who'd sit all day in the mud, and soak,
+And do just nothing but croak and croak.
+
+'Till a Blackbird whistled: "I say, you know,
+What _is_ the trouble down there below?
+Are you in sorrow, or pain, or what?"
+The Frog said: "Mine is a gruesome lot!
+Nothing but mud, and dirt, and slime,
+For me to look at the livelong time.
+'Tis a dismal world!" so he sadly spoke,
+And voiced his woes in a mournful croak.
+
+"But you're looking _down!_" the Blackbird said.
+"Look at the blossoms overhead;
+Look at the lovely summer skies;
+Look at the bees and butterflies--
+Look _up_, old fellow! Why, bless your soul,
+You're looking down in a muskrat's hole!"
+But still, with his gurgling sob and choke,
+The Frog continued to croak and croak.
+
+And a wise old Turtle, who boarded near,
+Said to the Blackbird: "Friend, see here:
+Don't shed your tears over him, for he
+Is wretched just 'cause he likes to be!
+He's one of the kind who _won't_ be glad;
+It makes him happy to think he's sad.
+_I'll_ tell you something--and it's no joke--
+Don't waste your pity on those who croak!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE OLD-FASHIONED GARDEN
+
+Oh, those sweet old-fashioned posies, that were mother's pride and joy,
+In the sunny little garden where I wandered when a boy!
+Oh, the morning-glories twining 'mongst the shining sunflowers tall,
+And the clematis a-tangle in the angle of the wall!
+How the mignonette's sweet blooming was perfuming all the walks,
+Where the hollyhocks stood proudly with their blossom-dotted stalks;
+While the old-maids' pinks were nodding groups of gossips, here and there,
+And the bluebells swung so lightly in the lazy, hazy air!
+
+Then the sleepy poppies, stooping low their drooping, drowsy heads,
+And the modest young sweet-williams hiding in their shady beds!
+By the edges of the hedges, where the spiders' webs were spun,
+How the marigolds lay, yellow as the mellow summer sun
+That made all the grass a-dapple 'neath the leafy apple tree,
+Whence you heard the locust drumming and the humming of the bee;
+While the soft breeze in the trellis, where the roses used to grow,
+Sent the silken petals flying like a scented shower of snow!
+
+Oh, the quaint old-fashioned garden, and the pathways cool and sweet,
+With the dewy branches splashing flashing jewels o'er my feet!
+And the dear old-fashioned blossoms, and the old home where they grew,
+And the mother-hands that plucked them, and the mother-love I knew!
+Ah, of all earth's fragrant flowers in the bowers on her breast,
+Sure the blooms which memory brings us are the brightest and the best;
+And the fairest, rarest blossoms ne'er could win my love, I know,
+Like the sweet old-fashioned posies mother tended long ago.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE LIGHT-KEEPER
+
+For years I've seen the frothy lines go thund'rin' down the shore;
+For years the surge has tossed its kelp and wrack about my door;
+I've heard the sea-wind sing its song in whispers 'round the place,
+And fought it when it flung the sand, like needles, in my face.
+I've seen the sun-rays turn the roof ter blist'rin', tarry coal;
+I've seen the ice-drift clog the bay from foamin' shoal ter shoal;
+I've faced the winter's snow and sleet, I've felt the summer's shower,
+But every night I've lit the lamp up yonder in the tower.
+
+I've seen the sunset flood the earth with streams of rosy light,
+And every foot of sea-line specked with twinklin' sails of white;
+I've woke ter find the sky a mess of scud and smoky wreath,
+A blind wind-devil overhead and hell let loose beneath.
+And then ter watch the rollers pound on ledges, bars and rips,
+And pray fer them that go, O Lord, down ter the sea in ships!
+Ter see the lamp, when darkness comes, throw out its shinin' track,
+And think of that one gleamin' speck in all the world of black.
+
+[Illustration: "It seems ter me that's all there is: jest do your duty
+right."]
+
+And often, through a night like that, I've waited fer the day
+That broke and showed a lonesome sea, a sky all cold and gray;
+And, may be, on the spit below, where sea-gulls whirl and screech,
+I've seen a somethin' stretched among the fresh weed on the beach;
+A draggled, frozen somethin', in the ocean's tangled scum,
+That meant a woman waitin' fer a man who'd never come;
+And all the drop of comfort in my sorrer I could git
+Was this: "I done my best ter save; thank God, the lamp was lit."
+
+And there's lots of comfort, really, to a strugglin' mortal's breast
+In the sayin', if it's truthful, of "I done my level best";
+It seems ter me that's all there is: jest do your duty right,
+No matter if yer rule a land or if yer tend a light.
+My lot is humble, but I've kept that lamp a-burnin' clear,
+And so, I reckon, when I die I'll know which course ter steer;
+The waves may roar around me and the darkness hide the view,
+But the lights'll mark the channel and the Lord'll tow me through.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE LITTLE OLD HOUSE BY THE SHORE
+
+It stands at the bend where the road has its end,
+ And the blackberries nod on the vine;
+And the sun flickers down to its gables of brown,
+ Through the sweet-scented boughs of the pine.
+The roof-tree is racked and the windows are cracked,
+ And the grasses grow high at the door,
+But hid in my heart is an altar, apart,
+ To the little old house by the shore.
+
+For its portal so bare was a Paradise rare,
+ With the blossoms that clustered above,
+When a mother's dear face gave a charm to the place
+ As she sang at her labor of love.
+And the breeze, as it strays through the window and plays
+ With the dust and the leaves on the floor,
+Is a memory sweet of the pattering feet
+ In the little old house by the shore.
+
+And again in my ears, through the dream of the years,
+ They whisper, the playmates of old,
+The brother whose eyes were a glimpse of the skies,
+ The sister with ringlets of gold;
+And Father comes late to the path at the gate,
+ As he did when the fishing was o'er,
+And the echoes ring out, at our welcoming shout,
+ From the little old house by the shore.
+
+But the night-wind has blown and the vision has flown,
+ And the sound of the children is still,
+And the shadowy mist, like a spirit, has kissed
+ The graves by the church on the hill;
+But softly, afar, sing the waves on the bar,
+ A song of the sunshine of yore:
+A lullaby deep for the loved ones who sleep
+ Near the little old house by the shore.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+WHEN THE TIDE GOES OUT
+
+When the tide goes out, how the foam-flakes dance
+ Through the wiry sedge-grass near the shore;
+How the ripples spark in the sunbeam's glance,
+ As they madly tumble the pebbles o'er!
+The barnacled rocks emerging seem,
+ As their beards of seaweed are tossed about,
+Like giants who wake from a troubled dream
+ And laugh for joy when the tide goes out.
+
+When the tide goes out, how the shining sands,
+ Like silver, glisten, and gleam, and glow;
+How the sea-gulls whirl, in their joyous bands,
+ O'er the shoals where the breakers come and go!
+The coal-black driftwood, gleaming wet,
+ Relic of by-gone vessel stout,
+With its clinging shells, seems a bar of jet,
+ Studded with pearls, when the tide goes out.
+
+When the tide goes out, how the breezes blow
+ The nodding plumes of the pine-trees through;
+How the far-off ships, like flakes of snow,
+ Are lightly sprinkled upon the blue!
+The Sea, as he moves in his slow retreat,
+ Like a warrior struggling for each redoubt,
+But with flashing lances the sand-bars meet
+ And drive him back, when the tide goes out.
+
+When the tide goes out, how each limpid pool
+ Reflects the sky and the fleecy cloud;
+How the rills, like children set free from school,
+ Prattle and plash and sing aloud!
+The shore-birds cheerily call, the while
+ They dart and circle in merry rout,--
+The face of the ocean seems to smile
+ And the earth to laugh, when the tide goes out.
+
+When the tide goes out, as the years roll by,
+ And Life sweeps on to the outer bar,
+And I feel the chill of the depths that lie
+ Beyond the shoals where the breakers are,
+I will not rail at a kindly Fate,
+ Or welcome Age with a peevish pout,
+But still, with a heart of Youth, await
+ The final wave, when the tide goes out.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE WATCHERS
+
+When the great, gray fog comes in, and the damp clouds cloak the shore,
+And the tossing waves grow dim, and the white sails flash no more,
+Then, over the shrouded sea, where the winding mist-wreaths creep,
+The deep-voiced Watchers call, the Watchers who guard the Deep.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"Hear! hear! hear! Hark to the word I bring!
+Toilers upon the sea, list to the Bell-buoy's ring!
+List, as I clash and clang! list, as I toss and toll!
+Under me yawns the grave, under me lies the shoal
+Where the whirling eddies wait to grapple the drowning crew,
+And the hungry quicksand hides the bones of the ship it slew.
+Swift on the outward tack! quick, to the seaward bear!
+Toilers upon the sea, here is the shoal! Beware!"
+
+"Hear! hear! hear! Hark to me, one and all!
+Toilers upon the sea, list to the Fog-horn's call!
+List to my buzzing cry! list, as I growl and groan:
+Here is the sullen shore where the white-toothed breakers moan;
+Where the silky ripples run with the wolf-like wave behind,
+To leap on the struggling wreck and worry and gnaw and grind,
+To toss on the cruel crag the dead with his streaming hair!
+Toilers upon the sea, here are the rocks! Beware!"
+
+"Hear! hear! hear! Hark to my stormy shriek!
+Toilers upon the sea, the Whistling-buoy would speak!
+List to my sobbing shout! list, for my word is brief:
+Death is beneath me here! death on the sunken reef
+Where the jagged ledge is hid and the slimy seaweeds grow,
+And the long kelp streamers wave in the dark green depths below,
+Where, under the shell-clad hulk, the gaunt shark makes his lair,--
+Toilers upon the sea, here is the reef! Beware!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+And then, o'er the silent sea, an answer from unseen lips,
+Comes in through the great, gray fog, the word from the mist-bound
+ ships,--
+A chorus of bell and horn, faint and afar and clear,--
+"Thanks, O Guard of the Deep! Watchers, we hear! we hear!"
+
+ * * * * *
+
+"THE REG'LAR ARMY MAN"
+
+He ain't no gold-laced "Belvidere,"
+ Ter sparkle in the sun;
+He do'n't parade with gay cockade,
+ And posies in his gun;
+He ain't no "pretty soldier boy,"
+ So lovely, spick and span,--
+He wears a crust of tan and dust,
+ The Reg'lar Army man;
+ The marchin', parchin',
+ Pipe-clay starchin',
+Reg'lar Army man.
+
+He ain't at home in Sunday-school,
+ Nor yet a social tea,
+And on the day he gets his pay
+ He's apt to spend it free;
+He ain't no temp'rance advocate,
+ He likes ter fill the "can,"
+He's kind er rough, and maybe, tough,
+ The Reg'lar Army man;
+ The r'arin', tearin',
+ Sometimes swearin',
+ Reg'lar Army man.
+
+No State'll call him "noble son,"
+ He ain't no ladies' pet,
+But, let a row start anyhow,
+ They'll send for him, you bet!
+He "do'n't cut any ice" at all
+ In Fash'n's social plan,--
+He gits the job ter face a mob,
+ The Reg'lar Army man;
+ The millin', drilling
+ Made fer killin',
+ Reg'lar Army man.
+
+[Illustration: "They ain't no tears shed over him. When he goes off
+ter war."]
+
+They ain't no tears shed over him
+ When he goes off ter war,
+He gits no speech nor prayerful "preach"
+ From mayor or governor;
+He packs his little knapsack up
+ And trots off in the van,
+Ter start the fight and start it right,
+ The Reg'lar Army man;
+ The rattlin', battlin',
+ Colt or Gatlin',
+ Reg'lar Army man.
+
+He makes no fuss about the job,
+ He do'n't talk big or brave,--
+He knows he's in ter fight and win,
+ Or help fill up a grave;
+He ain't no "Mama's darlin'," but
+ He does the best he can,
+And he's the chap that wins the scrap,
+ The Reg'lar Army man;
+ The dandy, handy,
+ Cool and sandy,
+ Reg'lar Army man.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+FIREMAN O'RAFFERTY
+
+A cloud of cinder-dotted smoke, whose billows rise and swell,
+Thrust through by seething swords of flame that roar like blasts from hell;
+A floor whose charring timbers groan and creak beneath the tread,
+With starting planks that, gaping, show long lines of sullen red;
+Great, hissing, scalding jets of steam that, lifting now, disclose
+A crouching figure gripping tight the nozzle of a hose,
+The dripping, rubber-coated form, scarce seen amid the murk,
+Of Fireman Mike O'Rafferty attending to his work.
+
+Pressed close against the blistered floor, he strives the fire to drown,
+And slowly, surely, steadfastly, he fights the demon down;
+And then he seeks the window-frame, all sashless, blank and bare,
+And wipes his plucky Irish face and gasps a bit for air;
+Then, standing on the slimy ledge, as narrow as his feet,
+He hums a tune, and looks straight down six stories to the street;
+Far, far below he sees the crowd's pale faces flush and fade,
+But Fireman Mike O'Rafferty can't stop to be afraid.
+
+Sometimes he climbs long ladders, through a fiery, burning rain
+To reach a pallid face that glares behind a crackling pane;
+Sometimes he feels his foothold shake with giddy swing and sway,
+And barely leaps to safety as the crashing roof gives way;
+Sometimes, penned in and stifling fast, he waits, with courage grim,
+And hears the willing axes ply that strive to rescue him;
+But sometime, somewhere, somehow, help may come a bit too late
+For Fireman Mike O'Rafferty of Engine Twenty-eight.
+
+And then the morning paper may have half a column filled
+With, "Fire at Bullion's Warehouse," and the line, "A Fireman Killed";
+And, in a neat, cheap tenement, a wife may mourn her dead,
+And all the small O'Raffertys go fatherless to bed
+And he'll not be a hero, for, you see, he didn't fall
+On some blood-spattered battle-field, slain by a rifle-ball;
+But, maybe, on the other side, on God's great roll of fame,
+Plain Fireman Mike O'Rafferty'll be counted just the same.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+LITTLE BARE FEET
+
+Little bare feet, sunburned and brown,
+Patterin', patterin' up and down,
+Dancin' over the kitchen floor,
+Light as the foam-flakes on the shore,--
+Right on the go from morn till late,
+From the garden path ter the old front gate,--
+There hain't no music ter me so sweet
+As the patterin' sound of them little bare feet.
+
+When I mend my nets by the foamin' sea,
+Them little bare feet trot there with me,
+And a shrill little voice I love'll say:
+"Dran'pa, spin me a yarn ter-day."
+And I know when my dory comes ter land,
+There's a spry little form somewheres on hand;
+And the very fust sound my ears'll meet
+Is the welcomin' run of them little bare feet.
+
+Oh, little bare feet! how deep you've pressed
+Yer prints of love in my worn old breast!
+And I sometimes think, when I come ter die,
+'Twill be lonesome-like in the by and by;
+That up in Heaven I'll long ter hear
+That little child's voice, so sweet and clear;
+That even there, on the golden street,
+I'll miss the pat of them little bare feet.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+A RAINY DAY
+
+Kind er _like_ a stormy day, take it all together,--
+Don't believe I'd want it jest only pleasant weather;
+If the sky was allers blue, guess I'd be complainin',
+And a-pesterin' around, wishin' it was rainin'.
+
+Like a stormy mornin' now, with the water dashin'
+From the eaves and from the spouts, foamin' and a-splashin',
+With the leaves and twigs around, shinin' wet and drippin',
+Shakin' in the wind with drops every-which-way skippin'.
+
+[Illustration]
+
+Like ter see the gusts of rain, where there's naught ter hinder,
+Sail acrost the fields and come "spat" against the winder,
+Streakin' down along the panes, floodin' sills and ledges,
+Makin' little fountains, like, in the sash's edges.
+
+Like ter see the brooks and ponds dimpled up all over,
+Like ter see the di'mon's shine on the bendin' clover,
+Like ter see the happy ducks in the puddles sailin'
+And the stuck-up rooster all draggled, wet and trailin'.
+
+But I like it best inside, with the fire a-gleamin',
+And myself, with chores all done, settin' round and dreaming
+With the kitten on my knee, and the kettle hummin',
+And the rain-drops on the roof, "Home, Sweet Home" a-drummin'.
+
+Kind er _like_ a stormy day, take it all together,
+Don't believe I'd want it jest only pleasant weather;
+If the sky was allers blue, guess I'd be complaining
+And a-pesterin' around, wishin' it was rainin'.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE HAND-ORGAN BALL
+
+When Twilight her soft robe of shadow spreads down.
+ And hushed is the roar and the din,
+When Evening is cooling the sweltering town,
+ 'Tis then that the frolics begin;
+And up in dim "Finnegan's Court," on the pavement,
+ Shut in by the loom of the tenement's wall,
+'Neath the swinging arc-light, on a warm summer's night,
+ They gather to dance at the hand-organ ball.
+
+'Tis not a society function, you see,
+ But quite an informal affair;
+The costumes are varied, yet simple and free,
+ And gems are exceedingly rare;
+The ladies are gowned in their calicoes, fetching,
+ And coatless and cool are the gentlemen, all.
+In a jacket, they say, one's not rated _au fait_
+ By the finicky guests at the hand-organ ball.
+
+There's "Ikey," the newsboy, and "Muggsy" who "shines";
+ There's Beppo who peddles "banan'";
+There's A. Lincoln Johnson, whose "Pa" kalsomines--
+ His skin has a very deep tan;
+There's Rosy, the cash-girl, and Mame, who ties bundles,
+ And Maggie, who works in the factory, tall;
+She's much in demand, for she "pivots so grand,"
+ She's really the belle of the hand-organ ball.
+
+Professor Spaghetti the music supplies,
+ From his hurdy-gurdy the waltz is sublime;
+His fair daughter Rosa, whose tambourine flies,
+ Is merrily thumping the rollicking time;
+The Widow McCann pats the tune with her slipper,
+ The peanut-man hums as he peers from his stall,
+And Officer Quinn for a moment looks in
+ To see the new steps at the hand-organ ball.
+
+The concert-hall tune echoes down the dark street,
+ The mothers lean out from the windows to see,
+While soft sounds the pat of the dancers' bare feet,
+ And tenement babies crow loud in their glee;
+And labor-worn fathers are laughing and chatting,--
+ Forgot for an hour is grim poverty's thrall;--
+There's joy here to-night, 'neath the swinging arc-light,
+ In "Finnegan's Court," at the hand-organ ball.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+[Illustration]
+
+"JIM"
+
+Want to see me, hey, old chap?
+Want to curl up in my lap,
+ Do yer, Jim?
+See him sit and purr and blink--
+Don't yer bet he knows I think
+ Lots of him?
+
+Little kitten, nothin' more,
+When we found him at the door.
+ In the cold,
+And the baby, half undressed,
+Picked him up, and he was jest
+ All she'd hold.
+
+Put him up fer me to see,
+And she says, so 'cute, says she,
+ "Baby's cat."
+And we never had the heart
+Fer to keep them two apart
+ After that.
+
+Seem's if _I must_ hear the beat
+Of her toddlin' little feet
+ 'Round about;
+Seem to see her tucked in bed,
+With the kitten's furry head
+ Peekin' out.
+
+Seem's if I could hear her say,
+In the cunnin' baby way
+ That she had:
+"Say 'dood-night' to Jimmie, do,
+'Coz if 'oo fordetted to
+ He'd feel bad."
+
+Miss her dreadful, don't we, boy?
+Day do'n't seem to bring no joy
+ With the dawn;
+Look's if night was everywhere,--
+But there's glory over there
+ Where she's gone.
+
+Seems as if my heart would break,
+But I love yer for her sake,
+ Don't I, Jim?
+See him sit and purr and blink,
+Don't yer bet he knows I think
+ Lots of him?
+
+ * * * * *
+
+IN MOTHER'S ROOM
+
+In Mother's room still stands the chair
+Beside the sunny window, where
+ The flowers she loved now lightly stir
+ In April's breeze, as though they were
+Forlorn without her loving care.
+
+Her books, her work-box, all are there,
+And still the snowy curtains bear
+ The soft, sweet scent of lavender
+ In Mother's room.
+
+Oh, spot so cool, and fresh, and fair,
+Where dwelt a soul so pure and rare,
+ On me your fragrant peace confer,
+ Make my life sweet with thoughts of her,
+As lavender makes sweet the air
+ In Mother's room.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+SUNSET-LAND
+
+Climb to my knee, little boy, little boy,--
+ If you look, as the sun sinks low,
+Where the cloud-hills rise in the western skies,
+ Each one with its crest aglow,
+O'er the rosy sea, where the purple isles
+ Have beaches of golden sand,
+To the fleecy height of the great cloud, white,
+You may catch a gleam of the twinkling light
+ At the harbor of Sunset-land.
+
+It's a wonderful place, little boy, little boy,
+ And its city is Sugarplum Town,
+Where the slightest breeze through the candy trees
+ Will tumble the bon-bons down;
+Where the fountains sprinkle their lemonade
+ In syrupy, cooling streams;
+And they pave each street with a goody, sweet,
+And mark them off in a manner neat,
+ With borders of chocolate creams.
+
+It's a children's town, little boy, little boy,
+ With a great big jail, you know,
+Where "grown-ups" stay who are heard to say,
+ "Now don't!" or "You mustn't do so."
+And half of the time it is Fourth of July,
+ And 'tis Christmas all the rest,
+With plenty of toys that will make a noise,
+For Santa is king of this realm of joys,
+ And knows what a lad likes best.
+
+Shall I tell you the way, little boy, little boy,
+ To get to this country, bright?
+When you're snug in bed, and your prayers are said,
+ You must shut up your eyelids tight;
+And wait till the sleepy old Sandman comes
+ And gives you his kindly hand,
+And then you'll float in a drowsy boat,
+O'er the sea of rose to the cloud, remote,
+ And the wonderful Sunset-land.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+THE SURF ALONG THE SHORE
+
+Ye children of the mountain, sing of your craggy peaks,
+Your valleys forest laden, your cliffs where Echo speaks;
+And ye, who by the prairies your childhood's joys have seen,
+Sing of your waving grasses, your velvet miles of green:
+But when my memory wanders down to the dear old home
+I hear, amid my dreaming, the seething of the foam,
+The wet wind through the pine trees, the sobbing crash and roar,
+The mighty surge and thunder of the surf along the shore.
+
+I see upon the sand-dunes the beach-grass sway and swing,
+I see the whirling sea-birds sweep by on graceful wing,
+I see the silver breakers leap high on shoal and bar,
+And hear the bell-buoy tolling his lonely note afar.
+The green salt-meadows fling me their salty, sweet perfume,
+I hear, through miles of dimness, the watchful fog-horn boom;
+Once more, beneath the blackness of night's great roof-tree high,
+The wild geese chant their marches athwart the arching sky.
+
+The dear old Cape! I love it! I love its hills of sand,
+The sea-wind singing o'er it, the seaweed on its strand;
+The bright blue ocean 'round it, the clear blue sky o'erhead;
+The fishing boats, the dripping nets, the white sails filled and spread;--
+For each heart has its picture, and each its own home song,
+The sights and sounds which move it when Youth's fair memories throng;
+And when, down dreamland pathways, a boy, I stroll once more,
+I hear the mighty music of the surf along the shore.
+
+ * * * * *
+
+AT EVENTIDE
+
+The tired breezes are tucked to rest
+ In the cloud-beds far away;
+The waves are pressed to the placid breast
+ Of the dreaming, gleaming bay;
+The shore line swims in a hazy heat,
+ Asleep in the sea and sky,
+And the muffled beat where the breakers meet
+ Is a soft, sweet lullaby.
+
+The pine-clad hill has a crimson crown
+ Of glittering sunset glows;
+The roofs of brown in the distant town
+ Are bathed in a blush of rose;
+The radiant ripples shine and shift
+ In shimmering shreds of gold;
+The seaweeds lift and drowse and drift,
+ And the jellies fill and fold.
+
+The great sun sinks, and the gray fog heaps
+ His cloak on the silent sea;
+The night-wind creeps where the ocean sleeps,
+ And the wavelets wake in glee;
+Across the bay, like a silver star,
+ There twinkles the harbor-light,
+And faint and far from the outer bar
+ The sea-birds call "Good-night."
+
+ * * * * *
+
+INDEX TO FIRST LINES
+
+ * * * * *
+
+A cloud of cinder-dotted smoke, whose billows rise and swell
+
+A solemn Sabbath stillness lies along the Mudville lanes
+
+A stretch of hill and valley, swathed thick in robes of white
+
+Almost every other evenin', jest as reg'lar as the clock
+
+"Blessed are the poor in spirit": there, I'll just remember that
+
+Climb to my knee, little boy, little boy,--
+
+For years I've seen the frothy lines go thund'rin' down the shore
+
+From the window of the chapel softly sounds an organ's note
+
+Grandfather's "summer sweets" are ripe
+
+He ain't no gold-laced "Belvidere"
+
+Hey, you swelled-up turkey feller!
+
+Home from college came the stripling, calm and cool and debonair
+
+I hain't no great detective, like yer read about,--the kind
+
+I never was naturally vicious;
+
+I remember, when a youngster, all the happy hours I spent
+
+I s'pose I hain't progressive, but I swan, it seems ter me
+
+I'll write, for I'm witty, a popular ditty
+
+I'm pretty nearly certain that 't was 'bout two weeks ago,--
+
+I've got a little yaller dog, a wuthless kind of chap
+
+In Mother's room still stands the chair
+
+In the gleam and gloom of the April weather
+
+It's a wonderful world we're in, my dear
+
+It's alone in the dark of the old wagon-shed
+
+It's getting on ter winter now, the nights are crisp and chill
+
+It stands at the bend where the road has its end
+
+Jason White has come ter town
+
+Just a simple little picture of a sunny country road
+
+Kind er _like_ a stormy day, take it all together,--
+
+Little bare feet, sunburned and brown,
+
+Little foot, whose lightest pat
+
+Me and Billy's in the woodshed; Ma said, "Run out-doors and play;
+
+My dream-ship's decks are of beaten gold
+
+My sister's best feller is 'most six-foot-three
+
+My son Hezekiah's a painter; yes, that's the purfession he's at;
+
+Now Councilman O'Hoolihan do'n't b'lave in annixation
+
+O, it's Christmas Eve, and moonlight, and the Christmas air is chill
+
+O you boys grown gray and bearded, you that used ter chum with me
+
+Oh, the cool September mornin's! now they 're with us once agin
+
+Oh, the Friday evening meetings in the vestry, long ago
+
+Oh! the horns are all a-tootin' as we rattle through the town
+
+Oh, the song of the Sea--
+
+Oh, the story-book boy! he's a wonderful youth
+
+Oh, the wild November wind
+
+Oh! they've swept the parlor carpet, and they've dusted every chair
+
+Oh, those sweet old-fashioned posies, that were mother's pride and joy
+
+Old Dan'l Hanks he says this town
+
+On a log behind the pigsty of a modest little farm
+
+Once, by the edge of a pleasant pool
+
+Our Aunt 'Mandy thinks that boys
+
+Our Sary Emma is possessed ter be at somethin' queer;
+
+Pavements a-frying in street and in square
+
+Say, I've got a little brother
+
+She's little and modest and purty
+
+Sometimes when we're in school, and it's the afternoon and late
+
+South Pokus is religious,--that's the honest, livin' truth;
+
+Summer nights at Grandpa's--ain't they soft and still!
+
+Sun like a furnace hung up overhead
+
+Sure, Felix McCarty he lived all alone
+
+The fog was so thick yer could cut it
+
+The spring sun flashes a rapier thrust
+
+The tired breezes are tucked to rest
+
+To my office window, gray
+
+Up in the attic I found them, locked in the cedar chest
+
+Want to see me, hey, old chap?
+
+_We'd_ never thought of takin' 'em,--'twas Mary Ann's idee,--
+
+When Ezry, that's my sister's son, came home from furrin parts
+
+When Papa's sick, my goodness sakes!
+
+When the farm work's done, at the set of sun
+
+When the great, gray fog comes in, and the damp clouds cloak the shore
+
+When the hot summer daylight is dyin'
+
+When the Lord breathes his wrath above the bosom of the waters
+
+When the tide goes out, how the foam-flakes dance
+
+When the toil of day is over
+
+When Twilight her soft robe of shadow spreads down
+
+Where leap the long Atlantic swells
+
+Where the warm spring sunlight, streaming
+
+Ye children of the mountain, sing of your craggy peaks
+
+You know the story--it's centuries old--
+
+
+THE END
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Cape Cod Ballads, and Other Verse, by
+Joseph C. Lincoln
+
+*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 11351 ***