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diff --git a/old/11323.txt b/old/11323.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..486170c --- /dev/null +++ b/old/11323.txt @@ -0,0 +1,14285 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of Caleb Williams, by William Godwin + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: Caleb Williams + Things As They Are + +Author: William Godwin + +Release Date: February 26, 2004 [EBook #11323] +[This File last updated: October 19, 2010] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CALEB WILLIAMS *** + + + + +Produced by Jon Ingram, and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team. + + + + +CALEB WILLIAMS + +OR THINGS AS THEY ARE + +BY WILLIAM GODWIN + +WITH AN INTRODUCTION BY ERNEST A. BAKER, M.A. + + +LONDON + +1903 + + + + +DRAMATIS PERSONAE + + +MR. FERDINANDO FALKLAND, a high-spirited and highly cultured gentleman, +a country squire in "a remote county of England." + +CALEB WILLIAMS, a youth, his secretary, the discoverer of his secret, +and the supposed narrator of the consequent events. + +MR. COLLINS, Falkland's steward and Caleb's friend. + +THOMAS, a servant of Falkland's. + +MR. FORESTER, Falkland's brother-in-law. + +MR. BARNABAS TYRREL, a brutal and tyrannical squire. + +MISS EMILY MELVILLE, his cousin and dependent, whom he cruelly maltreats +and does to death. + +GRIMES, a brutal rustic, suborned by Tyrrel to abduct Miss Melville. + +DR. WILSON; MRS. HAMMOND, friends of Miss Melville. MR. HAWKINS, farmer; +YOUNG HAWKINS, his son, Victims of Tyrrel's brutality, and wrongfully +hanged as his murderers. + +GINES, a robber and thief-taker, instrument of Falkland's vengeance upon +Caleb. + +MR. RAYMOND, an "Arcadian" captain of robbers. + +LARKINS, one of his band. + +AN OLD HAG, housekeeper to the robbers. + +A GAOLER. + +MISS PEGGY, the gaoler's daughter. + +MRS. MARNEY, a poor gentlewoman, Caleb's friend in distress. + +MR. SPURREL, a friend who informs on Caleb. + +MRS. DENISON, a cultivated lady with whom Caleb is for a while on +friendly terms. + + + + +INTRODUCTION + + +The reputation of WILLIAM GODWIN as a social philosopher, and the merits +of his famous novel, "Caleb Williams," have been for more than a century +the subject of extreme divergencies of judgment among critics. "The +first systematic anarchist," as he is called by Professor Saintsbury, +aroused bitter contention with his writings during his own lifetime, and +his opponents have remained so prejudiced that even the staid +bibliographer Allibone, in his "Dictionary of English Literature," a +place where one would think the most flagitious author safe from +animosity, speaks of Godwin's private life in terms that are little less +than scurrilous. Over against this persistent acrimony may be put the +fine eulogy of Mr. C. Kegan Paul, his biographer, to represent the +favourable judgment of our own time, whilst I will venture to quote one +remarkable passage that voices the opinions of many among Godwin's most +eminent contemporaries. + +In "The Letters of Charles Lamb," Sir T.N. Talfourd says: + + "Indifferent altogether to the politics of the age, Lamb could + not help being struck with productions of its newborn energies + so remarkable as the works and the character of Godwin. He + seemed to realise in himself what Wordsworth long afterwards + described, 'the central calm at the heart of all agitation.' + Through the medium of his mind the stormy convulsions of society + were seen 'silent as in a picture.' Paradoxes the most daring + wore the air of deliberate wisdom as he pronounced them. He + foretold the future happiness of mankind, not with the + inspiration of the poet, but with the grave and passionless + voice of the oracle. There was nothing better calculated at once + to feed and to make steady the enthusiasm of youthful patriots + than the high speculations in which he taught them to engage, on + the nature of social evils and the great destiny of his species. + No one would have suspected the author of those wild theories + which startled the wise and shocked the prudent in the calm, + gentlemanly person who rarely said anything above the most + gentle commonplace, and took interest in little beyond the + whist-table." + +WILLIAM GODWIN (1756-1836) was son and grandson of Dissenting ministers, +and was destined for the same profession. In theology he began as a +Calvinist, and for a while was tinctured with the austere doctrines of +the Sandemanians. But his religious views soon took an unorthodox turn, +and in 1782, falling out with his congregation at Stowmarket, he came up +to London to earn his bread henceforward as a man of letters. In 1793 +Godwin became one of the most famous men in England by the publication +of his "Political Justice," a work that his biographer would place side +by side with the "Speech for Unlicensed Printing," the "Essay on +Education," and "Emile," as one of "the unseen levers which have moved +the changes of the times." Although the book came out at what we should +call a "prohibitive price," it had an enormous circulation, and brought +its author in something like 1,000 guineas. In his first novel, "Caleb +Williams," which was published the next year, he illustrated in scenes +from real life many of the principles enunciated in his philosophical +work. "Caleb Williams" went through a number of editions, and was +dramatized by Colman the younger under the title of "The Iron Chest." It +has now been out of print for many years. Godwin wrote several other +novels, but one alone is readable now, "St. Leon," which is +philosophical in idea and purpose, and contains some passages of +singular eloquence and beauty. + +Godwin married the authoress of the "Rights of Woman," Mary +Wollstonecraft, in 1797, losing her the same year. Their daughter was +the gifted wife of the poet Shelley. He was a social man, particularly +fond of whist, and was on terms of intimacy and affection with many +celebrated men and women. Tom Paine, Josiah Wedgwood, and Curran were +among his closest male friends, while the story of his friendships with +Mrs. Inchbald, Amelia Opie, with the lady immortalized by Shelley as +Maria Gisborne, and with those literary sisters, Sophia and Harriet Lee, +authors of the "Canterbury Tales," has a certain sentimental interest. +Afterwards he became known to Wordsworth, Coleridge, and Lamb. He +married Mrs. Clairmont in 1801. His later years were clouded by great +embarrassments, and not till 1833 was he put out of reach of the worst +privations by the gift of a small sinecure, that of yeoman usher of the +Exchequer. He died in 1836. + +Among the contradictory judgments passed on "Caleb Williams" by Godwin's +contemporaries those of Hazlitt, Sir James Mackintosh, and Sir T. N. +Talfourd were perhaps the most eulogistic, whilst De Quincey and Allan +Cunningham criticized the book with considerable severity. Hazlitt's +opinion is quoted from the "Spirit of the Age": + + "A masterpiece, both as to invention and execution. The romantic + and chivalrous principle of the love of personal fame is + embodied in the finest possible manner in the character of + Falkland; as in Caleb Williams (who is not the first, but the + second character in the piece), we see the very demon of + curiosity personified. Perhaps the art with which these two + characters are contrived to relieve and set off each other has + never been surpassed by any work of fiction, with the exception + of the immortal satire of Cervantes." + +Sir Leslie Stephen said of it the other day: + + "It has lived--though in comparative obscurity--for over a + century, and high authorities tell us that vitality prolonged + for that period raises a presumption that a book deserves the + title of classic."--_National Review, February_, 1902. + +To understand how the work came to be written, and its aim, it is +advisable to read carefully all three of Godwin's prefaces, more +particularly the last and the most candid, written in 1832. This will, I +think, dispose of the objection that the story was expressly constructed +to illustrate a moral, a moral that, as Sir Leslie Stephen says, "eludes +him." He says: + + "I formed a conception of a book of fictitious adventure that + should in some way be distinguished by a very powerful interest. + Pursuing this idea, I invented first the third volume of my + tale, then the second, and, last of all, the first. I bent + myself to the conception of a series of adventures of flight and + pursuit; the fugitive in perpetual apprehension of being + overwhelmed with the worst calamities, and the pursuer, by his + ingenuity and resources, keeping his victim in a state of the + most fearful alarm. This was the project of my third volume." + +He goes on to describe in more detail the "dramatic and impressive" +situations and the "fearful events" that were to be evolved, making it +pretty clear that the purpose somewhat vaguely and cautiously outlined +in the earliest preface was rather of the nature of an afterthought. +Falkland is not intended to be a personification of the evils caused by +the social system, nor is he put forward as the inevitable product of +that system. The reader's attention is chiefly absorbed by the +extraordinary contest between Caleb Williams and Falkland, and in the +tragic situations that it involves. Compared with these the denunciation +of the social system is a matter of secondary interest; but it was +natural that the author of the "Political Justice," with his mind +preoccupied by the defects of the English social system, should make +those defects the, evil agencies of his plot. As the essential +conditions of the series of events, as the machinery by which everything +is brought about, these defects are of the utmost importance to the +story. It is the accused system that awards to Tyrrel and Falkland their +immense preponderance in society, and enables them to use the power of +the law for the most nefarious ends. Tyrrel does his cousin to death and +ruins his tenant, a man of integrity, by means of the law. This is the +occasion of Falkland's original crime. His more heinous offence, the +abandonment of the innocent Hawkinses to the gallows, is the consequence +of what Godwin expressly denounces, punishment for murder. "I conceived +it to be in the highest degree absurd and iniquitous, to cut off a man +qualified for the most essential and extensive utility, merely out of +retrospect to an act which, whatever were its merits, could not be +retrieved." Then a new element is imported into the train of causation, +Caleb's insatiable curiosity, and the strife begins between these +well-matched antagonists, the man of wealth and station utilizing all +the advantages granted him by the state of society to crush his enemy. +Godwin, then, was justified in declaring that his book comprehended "a +general view of the modes of domestic and unrecorded despotism by which +man becomes the destroyer of man." Such were the words of the original +preface, which was suppressed for a short time owing to the fears caused +by the trial of Horne Tooke, Thomas Holcroft and other revolutionists, +with whom Godwin was in profound sympathy. Had he intended "Caleb +Williams," however, from its first inception, to be an imaginative +version of the "Political Justice," he would have had to invent a +different plan and different characters. The arguments of a sociological +novel lack cogency unless the characters are fairly representative of +average mankind. Godwin's principal actors are both, to say the least, +exceptional. They are lofty idealizations of certain virtues and powers +of mind. Falkland is like Jean Valjean, a superhuman creature; and, +indeed, "Caleb Williams" may well be compared on one side with "Les +Miserables," for Victor Hugo's avowed purpose, likewise, was the +denunciation of social tyranny. But the characteristics that would have +weakened the implied theorem, had such been the main object, are the +very things that make the novel more powerful as drama of a grandiose, +spiritual kind. The high and concentrated imagination that created such +a being as Falkland, and the intensity of passion with which Caleb's +fatal energy of mind is sustained through that long, despairing +struggle, are of greater artistic value than the mechanical symmetry by +which morals are illustrated. + +E. A. B. + + + + +PREFACE + +BY THE AUTHOR. + + +The following narrative is intended to answer a purpose more general and +important than immediately appears upon the face of it. The question now +afloat in the world respecting THINGS AS THEY ARE is the most +interesting that can be presented to the human mind. While one party +pleads for reformation and change, the other extols in the warmest terms +the existing constitution of society. It seemed as if something would be +gained for the decision of this question if that constitution were +faithfully developed in its practical effects. What is now presented to +the public is no refined and abstract speculation; it is a study and +delineation of things passing in the moral world. It is but of late that +the inestimable importance of political principles has been adequately +apprehended. It is now known to philosophers that the spirit and +character of the Government intrudes itself into every rank of society. +But this is a truth highly worthy to be communicated to persons whom +books of philosophy and science are never likely to reach. Accordingly, +it was proposed, in the invention of the following work, to comprehend, +as far as the progressive nature of a single story would allow, a +general review of the modes of domestic and unrecorded despotism by +which man becomes the destroyer of man. If the author shall have taught +a valuable lesson, without subtracting from the interest and passion by +which a performance of this sort ought to be characterised, he will have +reason to congratulate himself upon the vehicle he has chosen. + +_May_ 12, 1794. + +This preface was withdrawn in the original edition, in compliance with +the alarms of booksellers. "Caleb Williams" made his first appearance in +the world in the same month in which the sanguinary plot broke out +against the liberties of Englishmen, which was happily terminated by the +acquittal of its first intended victims in the close of that year. +Terror was the order of the day; and it was feared that even the humble +novelist might be shown to be constructively a traitor. + +_October_ 29, 1795. + + + + +AUTHOR'S LATEST PREFACE. + + +LONDON, + +_November_ 20, 1832. + +"CALEB WILLIAMS" has always been regarded by the public with an unusual +degree of favour. The proprietor of "THE STANDARD NOVELS" has therefore +imagined that even an account of the concoction and mode of writing of +the work would be viewed with some interest. + +I finished the "Enquiry concerning Political Justice," the first work +which may be considered as written by me in a certain degree in the +maturity of my intellectual powers, and bearing my name, early in +January, 1793; and about the middle of the following month the book was +published. It was my fortune at that time to be obliged to consider my +pen as the sole instrument for supplying my current expenses. By the +liberality of my bookseller, Mr. George Robinson, of Paternoster Row, I +was enabled then, and for nearly ten years before, to meet these +expenses, while writing different things of obscure note, the names of +which, though innocent and in some degree useful, I am rather inclined +to suppress. In May, 1791, I projected this, my favourite work, and from +that time gave up every other occupation that might interfere with it. +My agreement with Robinson was that he was to supply my wants at a +specified rate while the book was in the train of composition. Finally, +I was very little beforehand with the world on the day of its +publication, and was therefore obliged to look round and consider to +what species of industry I should next devote myself. + +I had always felt in myself some vocation towards the composition of a +narrative of fictitious adventure; and among the things of obscure note +which I have above referred to were two or three pieces of this nature. +It is not therefore extraordinary that some project of the sort should +have suggested itself on the present occasion. + +But I stood now in a very different situation from that in which I had +been placed at a former period. In past years, and even almost from +boyhood, I was perpetually prone to exclaim with Cowley: + + "What shall I do to be for ever known, + And make the age to come my own?" + +But I had endeavoured for ten years, and was as far from approaching my +object as ever. Everything I wrote fell dead-born from the press. Very +often I was disposed to quit the enterprise in despair. But still I felt +ever and anon impelled to repeat my effort. + +At length I conceived the plan of Political Justice. I was convinced +that my object of building to myself a name would never be attained by +merely repeating and refining a little upon what other men had said, +even though I should imagine that I delivered things of this sort with a +more than usual point and elegance. The world, I believed, would accept +nothing from me with distinguishing favour that did not bear upon the +face of it the undoubted stamp of originality. Having long ruminated +upon the principles of Political Justice, I persuaded myself that I +could offer to the public, in a treatise on this subject, things at once +new, true, and important. In the progress of the work I became more +sanguine and confident. I talked over my ideas with a few familiar +friends during its progress, and they gave me every generous +encouragement. It happened that the fame of my book, in some +inconsiderable degree, got before its publication, and a certain number +of persons were prepared to receive it with favour. It would be false +modesty in me to say that its acceptance, when published, did not nearly +come up to everything that could soberly have been expected by me. In +consequence of this, the tone of my mind, both during the period in +which I was engaged in the work and afterwards, acquired a certain +elevation, and made me now unwilling to stoop to what was insignificant. + +I formed a conception of a book of fictitious adventure that should in +some way be distinguished by a very powerful interest. Pursuing this +idea, I invented first the third volume of my tale, then the second, and +last of all the first. I bent myself to the conception of a series of +adventures of flight and pursuit; the fugitive in perpetual apprehension +of being overwhelmed with the worst calamities, and the pursuer, by his +ingenuity and resources, keeping his victim in a state of the most +fearful alarm. This was the project of my third volume. I was next +called upon to conceive a dramatic and impressive situation adequate to +account for the impulse that the pursuer should feel, incessantly to +alarm and harass his victim, with an inextinguishable resolution never +to allow him the least interval of peace and security. This I +apprehended could best be effected by a secret murder, to the +investigation of which the innocent victim should be impelled by an +unconquerable spirit of curiosity. The murderer would thus have a +sufficient motive to persecute the unhappy discoverer, that he might +deprive him of peace, character, and credit, and have him for ever in +his power. This constituted the outline of my second volume. + +The subject of the first volume was still to be invented. To account +for the fearful events of the third, it was necessary that the pursuer +should be invested with every advantage of fortune, with a resolution +that nothing could defeat or baffle, and with extraordinary resources of +intellect. Nor could my purpose of giving an overpowering interest to my +tale be answered without his appearing to have been originally endowed +with a mighty store of amiable dispositions and virtues, so that his +being driven to the first act of murder should be judged worthy of the +deepest regret, and should be seen in some measure to have arisen out of +his virtues themselves. It was necessary to make him, so to speak, the +tenant of an atmosphere of romance, so that every reader should feel +prompted almost to worship him for his high qualities. Here were ample +materials for a first volume. + +I felt that I had a great advantage in thus carrying back my invention +from the ultimate conclusion to the first commencement of the train of +adventures upon which I purposed to employ my pen. An entire unity of +plot would be the infallible result; and the unity of spirit and +interest in a tale truly considered gives it a powerful hold on the +reader, which can scarcely be generated with equal success in any other +way. + +I devoted about two or three weeks to the imagining and putting down +hints for my story before I engaged seriously and methodically in its +composition. In these hints I began with my third volume, then proceeded +to my second, and last of all grappled with the first. I filled two or +three sheets of demy writing-paper, folded in octavo, with these +memorandums. They were put down with great brevity, yet explicitly +enough to secure a perfect recollection of their meaning, within the +time necessary for drawing out the story at full, in short paragraphs of +two, three, four, five, or six lines each. + +I then sat down to write my story from the beginning. I wrote for the +most part but a short portion in any single day. I wrote only when the +afflatus was upon me. I held it for a maxim that any portion that was +written when I was not fully in the vein told for considerably worse +than nothing. Idleness was a thousand times better in this case than +industry against the grain. Idleness was only time lost; and the next +day, it may be, was as promising as ever. It was merely a day perished +from the calendar. But a passage written feebly, flatly, and in a wrong +spirit, constituted an obstacle that it was next to impossible to +correct and set right again. I wrote therefore by starts; sometimes for +a week or ten days not a line. Yet all came to the same thing in the +sequel. On an average, a volume of "Caleb Williams" cost me four months, +neither less nor more. + +It must be admitted, however, that during the whole period, bating a few +intervals, my mind was in a high state of excitement. I said to myself a +thousand times, "I will write a tale that shall constitute an epoch in +the mind of the reader, that no one, after he has read it, shall ever be +exactly the same man that he was before."--I put these things down just +as they happened, and with the most entire frankness. I know that it +will sound like the most pitiable degree of self-conceit. But such +perhaps ought to be the state of mind of an author when he does his +best. At any rate, I have said nothing of my vainglorious impulse for +nearly forty years. + +When I had written about seven-tenths of the first volume, I was +prevailed upon by the extreme importunity of an old and intimate friend +to allow him the perusal of my manuscript. On the second day he returned +it with a note to this purpose: "I return you your manuscript, because I +promised to do so. If I had obeyed the impulse of my own mind, I should +have thrust it in the fire. If you persist, the book will infallibly +prove the grave of your literary fame." + +I doubtless felt no implicit deference for the judgment of my friendly +critic. Yet it cost me at least two days of deep anxiety before I +recovered the shock. Let the reader picture to himself my situation. I +felt no implicit deference for the judgment of my friendly critic. But +it was all I had for it. This was my first experiment of an unbiassed +decision. It stood in the place of all the world to me. I could not, and +I did not feel disposed to, appeal any further. If I had, how could I +tell that the second and third judgment would be more favourable than +the first? Then what would have been the result? No; I had nothing for +it but to wrap myself in my own integrity. By dint of resolution I +became invulnerable. I resolved to go on to the end, trusting as I could +to my own anticipations of the whole, and bidding the world wait its +time before it should be admitted to the consult. + +I began my narrative, as is the more usual way, in the third person. But +I speedily became dissatisfied. I then assumed the first person, making +the hero of my tale his own historian; and in this mode I have persisted +in all my subsequent attempts at works of fiction. It was infinitely the +best adapted, at least, to my vein of delineation, where the thing in +which my imagination revelled the most freely was the analysis of the +private and internal operations of the mind, employing my metaphysical +dissecting knife in tracing and laying bare the involutions of motive, +and recording the gradually accumulating impulses which led the +personages I had to describe primarily to adopt the particular way of +proceeding in which they afterwards embarked. + +When I had determined on the main purpose of my story, it was ever my +method to get about me any productions of former authors that seemed to +bear on my subject. I never entertained the fear that in this way of +proceeding I should be in danger of servilely copying my predecessors. I +imagined that I had a vein of thinking that was properly my own, which +would always preserve me from plagiarism. I read other authors, that I +might see what they had done, or, more properly, that I might forcibly +hold my mind and occupy my thoughts in a particular train, I and my +predecessors travelling in some sense to the same goal, at the same time +that I struck out a path of my own, without ultimately heeding the +direction they pursued, and disdaining to inquire whether by any chance +it for a few steps coincided or did not coincide with mine. + +Thus, in the instance of "Caleb Williams," I read over a little old +book, entitled "The Adventures of Mademoiselle de St. Phale," a French +Protestant in the times of the fiercest persecution of the Huguenots, +who fled through France in the utmost terror, in the midst of eternal +alarms and hair-breadth escapes, having her quarters perpetually beaten +up, and by scarcely any chance finding a moment's interval of security. +I turned over the pages of a tremendous compilation, entitled "God's +Revenge against Murder," where the beam of the eye of Omniscience was +represented as perpetually pursuing the guilty, and laying open his most +hidden retreats to the light of day. I was extremely conversant with the +"Newgate Calendar" and the "Lives of the Pirates." In the meantime no +works of fiction came amiss to me, provided they were written with +energy. The authors were still employed upon the same mine as myself, +however different was the vein they pursued: we were all of us engaged +in exploring the entrails of mind and motive, and in tracing the various +rencontres and clashes that may occur between man and man in the +diversified scene of human life. + +I rather amused myself with tracing a certain similitude between the +story of Caleb Williams and the tale of Bluebeard, than derived any +hints from that admirable specimen of the terrific. Falkland was my +Bluebeard, who had perpetrated atrocious crimes, which, if discovered, +he might expect to have all the world roused to revenge against him. +Caleb Williams was the wife who, in spite of warning, persisted in his +attempts to discover the forbidden secret; and, when he had succeeded, +struggled as fruitlessly to escape the consequences, as the wife of +Bluebeard in washing the key of the ensanguined chamber, who, as often +as she cleared the stain of blood from the one side, found it showing +itself with frightful distinctness on the other. + +When I had proceeded as far as the early pages of my third volume, I +found myself completely at a stand. I rested on my arms from the 2nd of +January, 1794, to the 1st of April following, without getting forward in +the smallest degree. It has ever been thus with me in works of any +continuance. The bow will not be for ever bent: + + "Opere in longo fas est obrepere somnum." + +I endeavoured, however, to take my repose to myself in security, and not +to inflict a set of crude and incoherent dreams upon my readers. In the +meantime, when I revived, I revived in earnest, and in the course of +that month carried on my work with unabated speed to the end. + +Thus I have endeavoured to give a true history of the concoction and +mode of writing of this mighty trifle. When I had done, I soon became +sensible that I had done in a manner nothing. How many flat and insipid +parts does the book contain! How terribly unequal does it appear to me! +From time to time the author plainly reels to and fro like a drunken +man. And, when I had done all, what had I done? Written a book to amuse +boys and girls in their vacant hours, a story to be hastily gobbled up +by them, swallowed in a pusillanimous and unanimated mood, without +chewing and digestion. I was in this respect greatly impressed with the +confession of one of the most accomplished readers and excellent critics +that any author could have fallen in with (the unfortunate Joseph +Gerald). He told me that he had received my book late one evening, and +had read through the three volumes before he closed his eyes. Thus, what +had cost me twelve months' labour, ceaseless heartaches and industry, +now sinking in despair, and now roused and sustained in unusual energy, +he went over in a few hours, shut the book, laid himself on his pillow, +slept, and was refreshed, and cried, + + "To-morrow to fresh woods and pastures new." + +I had thought to have said something here respecting the concoction of +"St. Leon" and "Fleetwood." But all that occurs to me on the subject +seems to be anticipated in the following + + + + +PREFACE TO THE FIRST EDITION. + + +_February 14, 1805._ + +Yet another novel from the same pen, which has twice before claimed the +patience of the public in this form. The unequivocal indulgence which +has been extended to my two former attempts, renders me doubly +solicitous not to forfeit the kindness I have experienced. + +One caution I have particularly sought to exercise: "not to repeat +myself." Caleb Williams was a story of very surprising and uncommon +events, but which were supposed to be entirely within the laws and +established course of nature, as she operates in the planet we inhabit. +The story of St. Leon is of the miraculous class; and its design, to +"mix human feelings and passions with incredible situations, and thus +render them impressive and interesting." + +Some of those fastidious readers--they may be classed among the best +friends an author has, if their admonitions are judiciously +considered--who are willing to discover those faults which do not offer +themselves to every eye, have remarked that both these tales are in a +vicious style of writing; that Horace has long ago decided that the +story we cannot believe we are by all the laws of criticism called upon +to hate; and that even the adventures of the honest secretary, who was +first heard of ten years ago, are so much out of the usual road that not +one reader in a million can ever fear they will happen to himself. + +Gentlemen critics, I thank you. In the present volumes I have served you +with a dish agreeable to your own receipt, though I cannot say with any +sanguine hope of obtaining your approbation. + +The following story consists of such adventures as for the most part +have occurred to at least one half of the Englishmen now existing who +are of the same rank of life as my hero. Most of them have been at +college, and shared in college excesses; most of them have afterward run +a certain gauntlet of dissipation; most have married, and, I am afraid, +there are few of the married tribe who have not at some time or other +had certain small misunderstandings with their wives.[A] To be sure, +they have not all of them felt and acted under these trite adventures as +my hero does. In this little work the reader will scarcely find anything +to "elevate and surprise;" and, if it has any merit, it must consist in +the liveliness with which it brings things home to the imagination, and +the reality it gives to the scenes it pourtrays. + +[Footnote A: I confess, however, the inability I found to weave a +catastrophe, such as I desired, out of these ordinary incidents. What I +have here said, therefore, must not be interpreted as applicable to the +concluding sheets of my work.] + +Yes, even in the present narrative, I have aimed at a certain kind of +novelty--a novelty which may be aptly expressed by a parody on a +well-known line of Pope; it relates: + + "Things often done, but never yet described." + +In selecting among common and ordinary adventures, I have endeavoured to +avoid such as a thousand novels before mine have undertaken to develop. +Multitudes of readers have themselves passed through the very incidents +I relate; but, for the most part, no work has hitherto recorded them. If +I have hold them truly, I have added somewhat to the stock of books +which should enable a recluse, shut up in his closet, to form an idea of +what is passing in the world. It is inconceivable, meanwhile, how much, +by this choice of a subject, I increased the arduousness of my task. It +is so easy to do, a little better, or a little worse, what twenty +authors have done before! If I had foreseen from the first all the +difficulty of my project, my courage would have failed me to undertake +the execution of it. + +Certain persons, who condescend to make my supposed inconsistencies the +favourite object of their research, will perhaps remark with exultation +on the respect expressed in this work for marriage, and exclaim, "It was +not always thus!" referring to the pages in which this subject is +treated in the "Enquiry concerning Political Justice" for the proof of +their assertion. The answer to this remark is exceedingly simple. The +production referred to in it, the first foundation of its author's claim +to public distinction and favour, was a treatise, aiming to ascertain +what new institutions in political society might be found more +conducive to general happiness than those which at present prevail. In +the course of this disquisition it was enquired whether marriage, as it +stands described and supported in the laws of England, might not with +advantage admit of certain modifications. Can anything be more distinct +than such a proposition on the one hand and a recommendation on the +other that each man for himself should supersede and trample upon the +institutions of the country in which he lives? A thousand things might +be found excellent and salutary, if brought into general practice, which +would in some cases appear ridiculous, and in others be attended with +tragical consequences, if prematurely acted upon by a solitary +individual. The author of "Political Justice," as appears again and +again in the pages of that work, is the last man in the world to +recommend a pitiful attempt, by scattered examples, to renovate the face +of society, instead of endeavouring, by discussion and reasoning, to +effect a grand and comprehensive improvement in the sentiments of its +members. + + * * * * * + + + + +VOLUME THE FIRST. + + + + +CHAPTER I. + + +My life has for several years been a theatre of calamity. I have been a +mark for the vigilance of tyranny, and I could not escape. My fairest +prospects have been blasted. My enemy has shown himself inaccessible to +entreaties, and untired in persecution. My fame, as well as my +happiness, has become his victim. Every one, as far as my story has been +known, has refused to assist me in my distress, and has execrated my +name. I have not deserved this treatment. My own conscience witnesses in +behalf of that innocence, my pretensions to which are regarded in the +world as incredible. There is now, however, little hope that I shall +escape from the toils that universally beset me. I am incited to the +penning of these memoirs only by a desire to divert my mind from the +deplorableness of my situation, and a faint idea that posterity may by +their means be induced to render me a justice which my contemporaries +refuse. My story will, at least, appear to have that consistency which +is seldom attendant but upon truth. + +I was born of humble parents, in a remote county of England. Their +occupations were such as usually fall to the lot of peasants, and they +had no portion to give me, but an education free from the usual sources +of depravity, and the inheritance, long since lost by their unfortunate +progeny! of an honest fame. I was taught the rudiments of no science, +except reading, writing, and arithmetic. But I had an inquisitive mind, +and neglected no means of information from conversation or books. My +improvement was greater than my condition in life afforded room to +expect. + +There are other circumstances deserving to be mentioned as having +influenced the history of my future life. I was somewhat above the +middle stature. Without being particularly athletic in appearance, or +large in my dimensions, I was uncommonly vigorous and active. My joints +were supple, and I was formed to excel in youthful sports. The habits of +my mind, however, were to a certain degree at war with the dictates of +boyish vanity. I had considerable aversion to the boisterous gaiety of +the village gallants, and contrived to satisfy my love of praise with an +unfrequent apparition at their amusements. My excellence in these +respects, however, gave a turn to my meditations. I delighted to read of +feats of activity, and was particularly interested by tales in which +corporeal ingenuity or strength are the means resorted to for supplying +resources and conquering difficulties. I inured myself to mechanical +pursuits, and devoted much of my time to an endeavour after mechanical +invention. + +The spring of action which, perhaps more than any other, characterised +the whole train of my life, was curiosity. It was this that gave me my +mechanical turn; I was desirous of tracing the variety of effects which +might be produced from given causes. It was this that made me a sort of +natural philosopher; I could not rest till I had acquainted myself with +the solutions that had been invented for the phenomena of the universe. +In fine, this produced in me an invincible attachment to books of +narrative and romance. I panted for the unravelling of an adventure with +an anxiety, perhaps almost equal to that of the man whose future +happiness or misery depended on its issue. I read, I devoured +compositions of this sort. They took possession of my soul; and the +effects they produced were frequently discernible in my external +appearance and my health. My curiosity, however, was not entirely +ignoble: village anecdotes and scandal had no charms for me: my +imagination must be excited; and when that was not done, my curiosity +was dormant. + +The residence of my parents was within the manor of Ferdinando Falkland, +a country squire of considerable opulence. At an early age I attracted +the favourable notice of Mr. Collins, this gentleman's steward, who used +to call in occasionally at my father's. He observed the particulars of +my progress with approbation, and made a favourable report to his master +of my industry and genius. + +In the summer of the year ----, Mr. Falkland visited his estate in our +county after an absence of several months. This was a period of +misfortune to me. I was then eighteen years of age. My father lay dead +in our cottage. I had lost my mother some years before. In this forlorn +situation I was surprised with a message from the squire, ordering me to +repair to the mansion-house the morning after my father's funeral. + +Though I was not a stranger to books, I had no practical acquaintance +with men. I had never had occasion to address a person of this elevated +rank, and I felt no small uneasiness and awe on the present occasion. I +found Mr. Falkland a man of small stature, with an extreme delicacy of +form and appearance. In place of the hard-favoured and inflexible +visages I had been accustomed to observe, every muscle and petty line of +his countenance seemed to be in an inconceivable degree pregnant with +meaning. His manner was kind, attentive, and humane. His eye was full of +animation; but there was a grave and sad solemnity in his air, which, +for want of experience, I imagined was the inheritance of the great, and +the instrument by which the distance between them and their inferiors +was maintained. His look bespoke the unquietness of his mind, and +frequently wandered with an expression of disconsolateness and anxiety. + +My reception was as gracious and encouraging as I could possibly desire. +Mr. Falkland questioned me respecting my learning, and my conceptions of +men and things, and listened to my answers with condescension and +approbation. This kindness soon restored to me a considerable part of my +self-possession, though I still felt restrained by the graceful, but +unaltered dignity of his carriage. When Mr. Falkland had satisfied his +curiosity, he proceeded to inform me that he was in want of a secretary, +that I appeared to him sufficiently qualified for that office, and that, +if, in my present change of situation, occasioned by the death of my +father, I approved of the employment, he would take me into his family. + +I felt highly flattered by the proposal, and was warm in the expression +of my acknowledgments. I set eagerly about the disposal of the little +property my father had left, in which I was assisted by Mr. Collins. I +had not now a relation in the world, upon whose kindness and +interposition I had any direct claim. But, far from regarding this +deserted situation with terror, I formed golden visions of the station +I was about to occupy. I little suspected that the gaiety and lightness +of heart I had hitherto enjoyed were upon the point of leaving me for +ever, and that the rest of my days were devoted to misery and alarm. + +My employment was easy and agreeable. It consisted partly in the +transcribing and arranging certain papers, and partly in writing from my +master's dictation letters of business, as well as sketches of literary +composition. Many of these latter consisted of an analytical survey of +the plans of different authors and conjectural speculations upon hints +they afforded, tending either to the detection of their errors, or the +carrying forward their discoveries. All of them bore powerful marks of a +profound and elegant mind, well stored with literature, and possessed of +an uncommon share of activity and discrimination. + +My station was in that part of the house which was appropriated for the +reception of books, it being my duty to perform the functions of +librarian as well as secretary. Here my hours would have glided in +tranquillity and peace, had not my situation included in it +circumstances totally different from those which attended me in my +father's cottage. In early life my mind had been much engrossed by +reading and reflection: my intercourse with my fellow mortals was +occasional and short. But, in my new residence, I was excited by every +motive of interest and novelty to study my master's character; and I +found in it an ample field for speculation and conjecture. + +His mode of living was in the utmost degree recluse and solitary. He had +no inclination to scenes of revelry and mirth. He avoided the busy +haunts of men; nor did he seem desirous to compensate for this privation +by the confidence of friendship. He appeared a total stranger to every +thing which usually bears the appellation of pleasure. His features were +scarcely ever relaxed into a smile, nor did that air which spoke the +unhappiness of his mind at any time forsake them: yet his manners were +by no means such as denoted moroseness and misanthropy. He was +compassionate and considerate for others, though the stateliness of his +carriage and the reserve of his temper were at no time interrupted. His +appearance and general behaviour might have strongly interested all +persons in his favour; but the coldness of his address, and the +impenetrableness of his sentiments, seemed to forbid those +demonstrations of kindness to which one might otherwise have been +prompted. + +Such was the general appearance of Mr. Falkland: but his disposition was +extremely unequal. The distemper which afflicted him with incessant +gloom had its paroxysms. Sometimes he was hasty, peevish, and +tyrannical; but this proceeded rather from the torment of his mind than +an unfeeling disposition; and when reflection recurred, he appeared +willing that the weight of his misfortune should fall wholly upon +himself. Sometimes he entirely lost his self-possession, and his +behaviour was changed into frenzy: he would strike his forehead, his +brows became knit, his features distorted, and his teeth ground one +against the other. When he felt the approach of these symptoms, he would +suddenly rise, and, leaving the occupation, whatever it was, in which he +was engaged, hasten into a solitude upon which no person dared to +intrude. + +It must not be supposed that the whole of what I am describing was +visible to the persons about him; nor, indeed, was I acquainted with it +in the extent here stated but after a considerable time, and in gradual +succession. With respect to the domestics in general, they saw but +little of their master. None of them, except myself, from the nature of +my functions, and Mr. Collins, from the antiquity of his service and the +respectableness of his character, approached Mr. Falkland, but at stated +seasons and for a very short interval. They knew him only by the +benevolence of his actions, and the principles of inflexible integrity +by which he was ordinarily guided; and though they would sometimes +indulge their conjectures respecting his singularities, they regarded +him upon the whole with veneration, as a being of a superior order. + +One day, when I had been about three months in the service of my patron, +I went to a closet, or small apartment, which was separated from the +library by a narrow gallery that was lighted by a small window near the +roof. I had conceived that there was no person in the room, and intended +only to put any thing in order that I might find out of its place. As I +opened the door, I heard at the same instant a deep groan, expressive of +intolerable anguish. The sound of the door in opening seemed to alarm +the person within; I heard the lid of a trunk hastily shut, and the +noise as of fastening a lock. I conceived that Mr. Falkland was there, +and was going instantly to retire; but at that moment a voice, that +seemed supernaturally tremendous, exclaimed, Who is there? The voice was +Mr. Falkland's. The sound of it thrilled my very vitals. I endeavoured +to answer, but my speech failed, and being incapable of any other reply, +I instinctively advanced within the door into the room. Mr. Falkland was +just risen from the floor upon which he had been sitting or kneeling. +His face betrayed strong symptoms of confusion. With a violent effort, +however, these symptoms vanished, and instantaneously gave place to a +countenance sparkling with rage. + +"Villain!" cried he, "what has brought you here?" I hesitated a +confused and irresolute answer. "Wretch!" interrupted Mr. Falkland, with +uncontrollable impatience, "you want to ruin me. You set yourself as a +spy upon my actions; but bitterly shall you repent your insolence. Do +you think you shall watch my privacies with impunity?" I attempted to +defend myself. "Begone, devil!" rejoined he. "Quit the room, or I will +trample you into atoms." Saying this, he advanced towards me. But I was +already sufficiently terrified, and vanished in a moment. I heard the +door shut after me with violence; and thus ended this extraordinary +scene. + +I saw him again in the evening, and he was then tolerably composed. His +behaviour, which was always kind, was now doubly attentive and soothing. +He seemed to have something of which he wished to disburthen his mind, +but to want words in which to convey it. I looked at him with anxiety +and affection. He made two unsuccessful efforts, shook his head, and +then putting five guineas into my hand, pressed it in a manner that I +could feel proceeded from a mind pregnant with various emotions, though +I could not interpret them. Having done this, he seemed immediately to +recollect himself, and to take refuge in the usual distance and +solemnity of his manner. + +I easily understood that secrecy was one of the things expected from me; +and, indeed, my mind was too much disposed to meditate upon what I had +heard and seen, to make it a topic of indiscriminate communication. Mr. +Collins, however, and myself happened to sup together that evening, +which was but seldom the case, his avocations obliging him to be much +abroad. He could not help observing an uncommon dejection and anxiety in +my countenance, and affectionately enquired into the reason. I +endeavoured to evade his questions, but my youth and ignorance of the +world gave me little advantage for that purpose. Beside this, I had been +accustomed to view Mr. Collins with considerable attachment, and I +conceived from the nature of his situation that there could be small +impropriety in making him my confident in the present instance. I +repeated to him minutely every thing that had passed, and concluded with +a solemn declaration that, though treated with caprice, I was not +anxious for myself; no inconvenience or danger should ever lead me to a +pusillanimous behaviour; and I felt only for my patron, who, with every +advantage for happiness, and being in the highest degree worthy of it, +seemed destined to undergo unmerited distress. + +In answer to my communication, Mr. Collins informed me that some +incidents, of a nature similar to that which I related, had fallen under +his own knowledge, and that from the whole he could not help concluding +that our unfortunate patron, was at times disordered in his intellects. +"Alas!" continued he, "it was not always thus! Ferdinando Falkland was +once the gayest of the gay. Not indeed of that frothy sort, who excite +contempt instead of admiration, and whose levity argues thoughtlessness +rather than felicity. His gaiety was always accompanied with dignity. It +was the gaiety of the hero and the scholar. It was chastened with +reflection and sensibility, and never lost sight either of good taste or +humanity. Such as it was however, it denoted a genuine hilarity of +heart, imparted an inconceivable brilliancy to his company and +conversation, and rendered him the perpetual delight of the diversified +circles he then willingly frequented. You see nothing of him, my dear +Williams, but the ruin of that Falkland who was courted by sages, and +adored by the fair. His youth, distinguished in its outset by the most +unusual promise, is tarnished. His sensibility is shrunk up and withered +by events the most disgustful to his feelings. His mind was fraught with +all the rhapsodies of visionary honour; and, in his sense, nothing but +the grosser part, the mere shell of Falkland, was capable of surviving +the wound that his pride has sustained." + +These reflections of my friend Collins strongly tended to inflame my +curiosity, and I requested him to enter into a more copious explanation. +With this request he readily complied; as conceiving that whatever +delicacy it became him to exercise in ordinary cases, it would be out of +place in my situation; and thinking it not improbable that Mr. Falkland, +but for the disturbance and inflammation of his mind, would be disposed +to a similar communication. I shall interweave with Mr. Collins's story +various information which I afterwards received from other quarters, +that I may give all possible perspicuity to the series of events. To +avoid confusion in my narrative, I shall drop the person of Collins, and +assume to be myself the historian of our patron. To the reader it may +appear at first sight as if this detail of the preceding life of Mr. +Falkland were foreign to my history. Alas! I know from bitter experience +that it is otherwise. My heart bleeds at the recollection of his +misfortunes, as if they were my own. How can it fail to do so? To his +story the whole fortune of my life was linked: because he was miserable, +my happiness, my name, and my existence have been irretrievably blasted. + + + + +CHAPTER II. + + +Among the favourite authors of his early years were the heroic poets of +Italy. From them he imbibed the love of chivalry and romance. He had too +much good sense to regret the times of Charlemagne and Arthur. But, +while his imagination was purged by a certain infusion of philosophy, he +conceived that there was in the manners depicted by these celebrated +poets something to imitate, as well as something to avoid. He believed +that nothing was so well calculated to make men delicate, gallant, and +humane, as a temper perpetually alive to the sentiments of birth and +honour. The opinions he entertained upon these topics were illustrated +in his conduct, which was assiduously conformed to the model of heroism +that his fancy suggested. + +With these sentiments he set out upon his travels, at the age at which +the grand tour is usually made; and they were rather confirmed than +shaken by the adventures that befel him. By inclination he was led to +make his longest stay in Italy; and here he fell into company with +several young noblemen whose studies and principles were congenial to +his own. By them he was assiduously courted, and treated with the most +distinguished applause. They were delighted to meet with a foreigner, +who had imbibed all the peculiarities of the most liberal and honourable +among themselves. Nor was he less favoured and admired by the softer +sex. Though his stature was small, his person had an air of uncommon +dignity. His dignity was then heightened by certain additions which were +afterwards obliterated,--an expression of frankness, ingenuity, and +unreserve, and a spirit of the most ardent enthusiasm. Perhaps no +Englishman was ever in an equal degree idolised by the inhabitants of +Italy. + +It was not possible for him to have drunk so deeply of the fountain of +chivalry without being engaged occasionally in affairs of honour, all of +which were terminated in a manner that would not have disgraced the +chevalier Bayard himself. In Italy, the young men of rank divide +themselves into two classes,--those who adhere to the pure principles of +ancient gallantry, and those who, being actuated by the same acute sense +of injury and insult, accustom themselves to the employment of hired +bravoes as their instruments of vengeance. The whole difference, indeed, +consists in the precarious application of a generally received +distinction. The most generous Italian conceives that there are certain +persons whom it would be contamination for him to call into the open +field. He nevertheless believes that an indignity cannot be expiated but +with blood, and is persuaded that the life of a man is a trifling +consideration, in comparison of the indemnification to be made to his +injured honour. There is, therefore, scarcely any Italian that would +upon some occasions scruple assassination. Men of spirit among them, +notwithstanding the prejudices of their education, cannot fail to have a +secret conviction of its baseness, and will be desirous of extending as +far as possible the cartel of honour. Real or affected arrogance teaches +others to regard almost the whole species as their inferiors, and of +consequence incites them to gratify their vengeance without danger to +their persons. Mr. Falkland met with some of these. But his undaunted +spirit and resolute temper gave him a decisive advantage even in such +perilous rencounters. One instance, among many, of his manner of +conducting himself among this proud and high-spirited people it may be +proper to relate. Mr. Falkland is the principal agent in my history; and +Mr. Falkland in the autumn and decay of his vigour, such as I found him, +cannot be completely understood without a knowledge of his previous +character, as it was in all the gloss of youth, yet unassailed by +adversity, and unbroken in upon by anguish or remorse. + +At Rome he was received with particular distinction at the house of +marquis Pisani, who had an only daughter, the heir of his immense +fortune, and the admiration of all the young nobility of that +metropolis. Lady Lucretia Pisani was tall, of a dignified form, and +uncommonly beautiful. She was not deficient in amiable qualities, but +her soul was haughty, and her carriage not unfrequently contemptuous. +Her pride was nourished by the consciousness of her charms, by her +elevated rank, and the universal adoration she was accustomed to +receive. + +Among her numerous lovers count Malvesi was the individual most favoured +by her father, nor did his addresses seem indifferent to her. The count +was a man of considerable accomplishments, and of great integrity and +benevolence of disposition. But he was too ardent a lover, to be able +always to preserve the affability of his temper. The admirers whose +addresses were a source of gratification to his mistress, were a +perpetual uneasiness to him. Placing his whole happiness in the +possession of this imperious beauty, the most trifling circumstances +were capable of alarming him for the security of his pretensions. But +most of all he was jealous of the English cavalier. Marquis Pisani, who +had spent many years in France, was by no means partial to the +suspicious precautions of Italian fathers, and indulged his daughter in +considerable freedoms. His house and his daughter, within certain +judicious restraints, were open to the resort of male visitants. But, +above all, Mr. Falkland, as a foreigner, and a person little likely to +form pretensions to the hand of Lucretia, was received upon a footing of +great familiarity. The lady herself, conscious of innocence, entertained +no scruple about trifles, and acted with the confidence and frankness of +one who is superior to suspicion. + +Mr. Falkland, after a residence of several weeks at Rome, proceeded to +Naples. Meanwhile certain incidents occurred that delayed the intended +nuptials of the heiress of Pisani. When he returned to Rome Count +Malvesi was absent. Lady Lucretia, who had been considerably amused +before with the conversation of Mr. Falkland, and who had an active and +enquiring mind, had conceived, in the interval between his first and +second residence at Rome, a desire to be acquainted with the English +language, inspired by the lively and ardent encomiums of our best +authors that she had heard from their countryman. She had provided +herself with the usual materials for that purpose, and had made some +progress during his absence. But upon his return she was forward to make +use of the opportunity, which, if missed, might never occur again with +equal advantage, of reading select passages of our poets with an +Englishman of uncommon taste and capacity. + +This proposal necessarily led to a more frequent intercourse. When Count +Malvesi returned, he found Mr. Falkland established almost as an inmate +of the Pisani palace. His mind could not fail to be struck with the +criticalness of the situation. He was perhaps secretly conscious that +the qualifications of the Englishman were superior to his own; and he +trembled for the progress that each party might have made in the +affection of the other, even before they were aware of the danger. He +believed that the match was in every respect such as to flatter the +ambition of Mr. Falkland; and he was stung even to madness by the idea +of being deprived of the object dearest to his heart by this tramontane +upstart. + +He had, however, sufficient discretion first to demand an explanation of +Lady Lucretia. She, in the gaiety of her heart, trifled with his +anxiety. His patience was already exhausted, and he proceeded in his +expostulation, in language that she was by no means prepared to endure +with apathy. Lady Lucretia had always been accustomed to deference and +submission; and, having got over something like terror, that was at +first inspired by the imperious manner in which she was now catechised, +her next feeling was that of the warmest resentment. She disdained to +satisfy so insolent a questioner, and even indulged herself in certain +oblique hints calculated to strengthen his suspicions. For some time she +described his folly and presumption in terms of the most ludicrous +sarcasm, and then, suddenly changing her style, bid him never let her +see him more except upon the footing of the most distant acquaintance, +as she was determined never again to subject herself to so unworthy a +treatment. She was happy that he had at length disclosed to her his true +character, and would know how to profit of her present experience to +avoid a repetition of the same danger. All this passed in the full +career of passion on both sides, and Lady Lucretia had no time to +reflect upon what might be the consequence of thus exasperating her +lover. + +Count Malvesi left her in all the torments of frenzy. He believed that +this was a premeditated scene, to find a pretence for breaking off an +engagement that was already all but concluded; or, rather, his mind was +racked with a thousand conjectures: he alternately thought that the +injustice might be hers or his own; and he quarrelled with Lady +Lucretia, himself, and the whole world. In this temper he hastened to +the hotel of the English cavalier. The season of expostulation was now +over, and he found himself irresistibly impelled to justify his +precipitation with the lady, by taking for granted that the subject of +his suspicion was beyond the reach of doubt. + +Mr. Falkland was at home. The first words of the count were an abrupt +accusation of duplicity in the affair of Lady Lucretia, and a challenge. +The Englishman had an unaffected esteem for Malvesi, who was in reality +a man of considerable merit, and who had been one of Mr. Falkland's +earliest Italian acquaintance, they having originally met at Milan. But +more than this, the possible consequence of a duel in the present +instance burst upon his mind. He had the warmest admiration for Lady +Lucretia, though his feelings were not those of a lover; and he knew +that, however her haughtiness might endeavour to disguise it, she was +impressed with a tender regard for Count Malvesi. He could not bear to +think that any misconduct of his should interrupt the prospects of so +deserving a pair. Guided by these sentiments, he endeavoured to +expostulate with the Italian. But his attempts were ineffectual. His +antagonist was drunk with choler, and would not listen to a word that +tended to check the impetuosity of his thoughts. He traversed the room +with perturbed steps, and even foamed with anguish and fury. Mr. +Falkland, finding that all was to no purpose, told the count, that, if +he would return to-morrow at the same hour, he would attend him to any +scene of action he should think proper to select. + +From Count Malvesi Mr. Falkland immediately proceeded to the palace of +Pisani. Here he found considerable difficulty in appeasing the +indignation of Lady Lucretia. His ideas of honour would by no means +allow him to win her to his purpose by disclosing the cartel he had +received; otherwise that disclosure would immediately have operated as +the strongest motive that could have been offered to this disdainful +beauty. But, though she dreaded such an event, the vague apprehension +was not strong enough to induce her instantly to surrender all the +stateliness of her resentment. Mr. Falkland, however, drew so +interesting a picture of the disturbance of Count Malvesi's mind, and +accounted in so flattering a manner for the abruptness of his conduct, +that this, together with the arguments he adduced, completed the +conquest of Lady Lucretia's resentment. Having thus far accomplished his +purpose, he proceeded to disclose to her every thing that had passed. + +The next day Count Malvesi appeared, punctual to his appointment, at Mr. +Falkland's hotel. Mr. Falkland came to the door to receive him, but +requested him to enter the house for a moment, as he had still an affair +of three minutes to despatch. They proceeded to a parlour. Here Mr. +Falkland left him, and presently returned leading in Lady Lucretia +herself, adorned in all her charms, and those charms heightened upon the +present occasion by a consciousness of the spirited and generous +condescension she was exerting. Mr. Falkland led her up to the +astonished count; and she, gently laying her hand upon the arm of her +lover, exclaimed with the most attractive grace, "Will you allow me to +retract the precipitate haughtiness into which I was betrayed?" The +enraptured count, scarcely able to believe his senses, threw himself +upon his knees before her, and stammered out his reply, signifying that +the precipitation had been all his own, that he only had any forgiveness +to demand, and, though they might pardon, he could never pardon himself +for the sacrilege he had committed against her and this god-like +Englishman. As soon as the first tumults of his joy had subsided, Mr. +Falkland addressed him thus:-- + +"Count Malvesi, I feel the utmost pleasure in having thus by peaceful +means disarmed your resentment, and effected your happiness. But I must +confess, you put me to a severe trial. My temper is not less impetuous +and fiery than your own, and it is not at all times that I should have +been thus able to subdue it. But I considered that in reality the +original blame was mine. Though your suspicion was groundless, it was +not absurd. We have been trifling too much in the face of danger. I +ought not, under the present weakness of our nature and forms of +society, to have been so assiduous in my attendance upon this enchanting +woman. It would have been little wonder, if, having so many +opportunities, and playing the preceptor with her as I have done, I had +been entangled before I was aware, and harboured a wish which I might +not afterwards have had courage to subdue. I owed you an atonement for +this imprudence. + +"But the laws of honour are in the utmost degree rigid; and there was +reason to fear that, however anxious I were to be your friend, I might +be obliged to be your murderer. Fortunately, the reputation of my +courage is sufficiently established, not to expose it to any impeachment +by my declining your present defiance. It was lucky, however, that in +our interview of yesterday you found me alone, and that accident by +that means threw the management of the affair into my disposal. If the +transaction should become known, the conclusion will now become known +along with the provocation, and I am satisfied. But if the challenge had +been public, the proofs I had formerly given of courage would not have +excused my present moderation; and, though desirous to have avoided the +combat, it would not have been in my power. Let us hence each of us +learn to avoid haste and indiscretion, the consequences of which may be +inexpiable but with blood; and may Heaven bless you in a consort of whom +I deem you every way worthy!" + +I have already said that this was by no means the only instance, in the +course of his travels, in which Mr. Falkland acquitted himself in the +most brilliant manner as a man of gallantry and virtue. He continued +abroad during several years, every one of which brought some fresh +accession to the estimation in which he was held, as well as to his own +impatience of stain or dishonour. At length he thought proper to return +to England, with the intention of spending the rest of his days at the +residence of his ancestors. + + + + +CHAPTER III. + + +From the moment he entered upon the execution of this purpose, dictated +as it probably was by an unaffected principle of duty, his misfortunes +took their commencement. All I have further to state of his history is +the uninterrupted persecution of a malignant destiny, a series of +adventures that seemed to take their rise in various accidents, but +pointing to one termination. Him they overwhelmed with an anguish he +was of all others least qualified to bear; and these waters of +bitterness, extending beyond him, poured their deadly venom upon others. +I being myself the most unfortunate of their victims. + +The person in whom these calamities originated was Mr. Falkland's +nearest neighbour, a man of estate equal to his own, by name Barnabas +Tyrrel. This man one might at first have supposed of all others least +qualified from instruction, or inclined by the habits of his life, to +disturb the enjoyments of a mind so richly endowed as that of Mr. +Falkland. Mr. Tyrrel might have passed for a true model of the English +squire. He was early left under the tuition of his mother, a woman of +narrow capacity, and who had no other child. The only remaining member +of the family it may be necessary to notice was Miss Emily Melville, the +orphan daughter of Mr. Tyrrel's paternal aunt; who now resided in the +family mansion, and was wholly dependent on the benevolence of its +proprietors. + +Mrs. Tyrrel appeared to think that there was nothing in the world so +precious as her hopeful Barnabas. Every thing must give way to his +accommodation and advantage; every one must yield the most servile +obedience to his commands. He must not be teased or restricted by any +forms of instruction; and of consequence his proficiency, even in the +arts of writing and reading, was extremely slender. From his birth he +was muscular and sturdy; and, confined to the _ruelle_ of his mother, he +made much such a figure as the whelp-lion that a barbarian might have +given for a lap-dog to his mistress. + +But he soon broke loose from these trammels, and formed an acquaintance +with the groom and the game-keeper. Under their instruction he proved as +ready a scholar, as he had been indocile and restive to the pedant who +held the office of his tutor. It was now evident that his small +proficiency in literature was by no means to be ascribed to want of +capacity. He discovered no contemptible sagacity and quick-wittedness in +the science of horse-flesh, and was eminently expert in the arts of +shooting, fishing, and hunting. Nor did he confine himself to these, but +added the theory and practice of boxing, cudgel play, and quarter-staff. +These exercises added ten-fold robustness and vigour to his former +qualifications. + +His stature, when grown, was somewhat more than five feet ten inches in +height, and his form might have been selected by a painter as a model +for that hero of antiquity, whose prowess consisted in felling an ox +with his fist, and devouring him at a meal. Conscious of his advantage +in this respect, he was insupportably arrogant, tyrannical to his +inferiors, and insolent to his equals. The activity of his mind being +diverted from the genuine field of utility and distinction, showed +itself in the rude tricks of an overgrown lubber. Here, as in all his +other qualifications, he rose above his competitors; and if it had been +possible to overlook the callous and unrelenting disposition which they +manifested, one could scarcely have denied his applause to the invention +these freaks displayed, and the rough, sarcastic wit with which they +were accompanied. + +Mr. Tyrrel was by no means inclined to permit these extraordinary merits +to rust in oblivion. There was a weekly assembly at the nearest +market-town, the resort of all the rural gentry. Here he had hitherto +figured to the greatest advantage as grand master of the _coterie_, no +one having an equal share of opulence, and the majority, though still +pretending to the rank of gentry, greatly his inferior in this essential +article. The young men in this circle looked up to this insolent bashaw +with timid respect, conscious of the comparative eminence that +unquestionably belonged to the powers of his mind; and he well knew how +to maintain his rank with an inflexible hand. Frequently indeed he +relaxed his features, and assumed a temporary appearance of affableness +and familiarity; but they found by experience, that if any one, +encouraged by his condescension, forgot the deference which Mr. Tyrrel +considered as his due, he was soon taught to repent his presumption. It +was a tiger that thought proper to toy with a mouse, the little animal +every moment in danger of being crushed by the fangs of his ferocious +associate. As Mr. Tyrrel had considerable copiousness of speech, and a +rich, but undisciplined imagination, he was always sure of an audience. +His neighbours crowded round, and joined in the ready laugh, partly from +obsequiousness, and partly from unfeigned admiration. It frequently +happened, however; that, in the midst of his good humour, a +characteristic refinement of tyranny would suggest itself to his mind. +When his subjects, encouraged by his familiarity, had discarded their +precaution, the wayward fit would seize him, a sudden cloud overspread +his brow, his voice transform from the pleasant to the terrible, and a +quarrel of a straw immediately ensue with the first man whose face he +did not like. The pleasure that resulted to others from the exuberant +sallies of his imagination was, therefore, not unalloyed with sudden +qualms of apprehension and terror. It may be believed that this +despotism did not gain its final ascendancy without being contested in +the outset. But all opposition was quelled with a high hand by this +rural Antaeus. By the ascendancy of his fortune, and his character among +his neighbours, he always reduced his adversary to the necessity of +encountering him at his own weapons, and did not dismiss him without +making him feel his presumption through every joint in his frame. The +tyranny of Mr. Tyrrel would not have been so patiently endured, had not +his colloquial accomplishments perpetually come in aid of that authority +which his rank and prowess originally obtained. + +The situation of our squire with the fair was still more enviable than +that which he maintained among persons of his own sex. Every mother +taught her daughter to consider the hand of Mr. Tyrrel as the highest +object of her ambition. Every daughter regarded his athletic form and +his acknowledged prowess with a favourable eye. A form eminently +athletic is, perhaps, always well proportioned; and one of the +qualifications that women are early taught to look for in the male sex, +is that of a protector. As no man was adventurous enough to contest his +superiority, so scarcely any woman in this provincial circle would have +scrupled to prefer his addresses to those of any other admirer. His +boisterous wit had peculiar charms for them; and there was no spectacle +more flattering to their vanity, than seeing this Hercules exchange his +club for a distaff. It was pleasing to them to consider, that the fangs +of this wild beast, the very idea of which inspired trepidation into the +boldest hearts, might be played with by them with the utmost security. + +Such was the rival that Fortune, in her caprice, had reserved for the +accomplished Falkland. This untamed, though not undiscerning brute, was +found capable of destroying the prospects of a man the most eminently +qualified to enjoy and to communicate happiness. The feud that sprung up +between them was nourished by concurring circumstances, till it attained +a magnitude difficult to be paralleled; and, because they regarded each +other with a deadly hatred, I have become an object of misery and +abhorrence. + +The arrival of Mr. Falkland gave an alarming shock to the authority of +Mr. Tyrrel in the village assembly and in all scenes of indiscriminate +resort. His disposition by no means inclined him to withhold himself +from scenes of fashionable amusement; and he and his competitor were +like two stars fated never to appear at once above the horizon. The +advantages Mr. Falkland possessed in the comparison are palpable; and +had it been otherwise, the subjects of his rural neighbour were +sufficiently disposed to revolt against his merciless dominion. They had +hitherto submitted from fear, and not from love; and, if they had not +rebelled, it was only for want of a leader. Even the ladies regarded Mr. +Falkland with particular complacence. His polished manners were +peculiarly in harmony with feminine delicacy. The sallies of his wit +were far beyond those of Mr. Tyrrel in variety and vigour; in addition +to which they had the advantage of having their spontaneous exuberance +guided and restrained by the sagacity of a cultivated mind. The graces +of his person were enhanced by the elegance of his deportment; and the +benevolence and liberality of his temper were upon all occasions +conspicuous. It was common indeed to Mr. Tyrrel, together with Mr. +Falkland, to be little accessible to sentiments of awkwardness and +confusion. But for this Mr. Tyrrel was indebted to a self-satisfied +effrontery, and a boisterous and over-bearing elocution, by which he was +accustomed to discomfit his assailants; while Mr. Falkland, with great +ingenuity and candour of mind, was enabled by his extensive knowledge of +the world, and acquaintance with his own resources, to perceive almost +instantaneously the proceeding it most became him to adopt. + +Mr. Tyrrel contemplated the progress of his rival with uneasiness and +aversion. He often commented upon it to his particular confidents as a +thing altogether inconceivable. Mr. Falkland he described as an animal +that was beneath contempt. Diminutive and dwarfish in his form, he +wanted to set up a new standard of human nature, adapted to his +miserable condition. He wished to persuade people that the human species +were made to be nailed to a chair, and to pore over books. He would have +them exchange those robust exercises which make us joyous in the +performance, and vigorous in the consequences, for the wise labour of +scratching our heads for a rhyme and counting our fingers for a verse. +Monkeys were as good men as these. A nation of such animals would have +no chance with a single regiment of the old English votaries of beef and +pudding. He never saw any thing come of learning but to make people +foppish and impertinent; and a sensible man would not wish a worse +calamity to the enemies of his nation, than to see them run mad after +such pernicious absurdities. It was impossible that people could +seriously feel any liking for such a ridiculous piece of goods as this +outlandish foreign-made Englishman. But he knew very well how it was: it +was a miserable piece of mummery that was played only in spite of him. +But God for ever blast his soul, if he were not bitterly revenged upon +them all! + +If such were the sentiments of Mr. Tyrrel, his patience found ample +exercise in the language which was held by the rest of his neighbours on +the same subject. While he saw nothing in Mr. Falkland but matter of +contempt, they appeared to be never weary of recounting his praises. +Such dignity, such affability, so perpetual an attention to the +happiness of others, such delicacy of sentiment and expression! Learned +without ostentation, refined without foppery, elegant without +effeminacy! Perpetually anxious to prevent his superiority from being +painfully felt, it was so much the more certainly felt to be real, and +excited congratulation instead of envy in the spectator. It is scarcely +necessary to remark, that the revolution of sentiment in this rural +vicinity belongs to one of the most obvious features of the human mind. +The rudest exhibition of art is at first admired, till a nobler is +presented, and we are taught to wonder at the facility with which before +we had been satisfied. Mr. Tyrrel thought there would be no end to the +commendation; and expected when their common acquaintance would fall +down and adore the intruder. The most inadvertent expression of applause +inflicted upon him the torment of demons. He writhed with agony, his +features became distorted, and his looks inspired terror. Such suffering +would probably have soured the kindest temper; what must have been its +effect upon Mr. Tyrrel's, always fierce, unrelenting, and abrupt? + +The advantages of Mr. Falkland seemed by no means to diminish with their +novelty. Every new sufferer from Mr. Tyrrel's tyranny immediately went +over to the standard of his adversary. The ladies, though treated by +their rustic swain with more gentleness than the men, were occasionally +exposed to his capriciousness and insolence. They could not help +remarking the contrast between these two leaders in the fields of +chivalry, the one of whom paid no attention to any one's pleasure but +his own, while the other seemed all good-humour and benevolence. It was +in vain that Mr. Tyrrel endeavoured to restrain the ruggedness of his +character. His motive was impatience, his thoughts were gloomy, and his +courtship was like the pawings of an elephant. It appeared as if his +temper had been more human while he indulged in its free bent, than now +that he sullenly endeavoured to put fetters upon its excesses. + +Among the ladies of the village-assembly already mentioned, there was +none that seemed to engage more of the kindness of Mr. Tyrrel than Miss +Hardingham. She was also one of the few that had not yet gone over to +the enemy, either because she really preferred the gentleman who was her +oldest acquaintance, or that she conceived from calculation this conduct +best adapted to insure her success in a husband. One day, however, she +thought proper, probably only by way of experiment, to show Mr. Tyrrel +that she could engage in hostilities, if he should at any time give her +sufficient provocation. She so adjusted her manoeuvres as to be engaged +by Mr. Falkland as his partner for the dance of the evening, though +without the smallest intention on the part of that gentleman (who was +unpardonably deficient in the sciences of anecdote and match-making) of +giving offence to his country neighbour. Though the manners of Mr. +Falkland were condescending and attentive, his hours of retirement were +principally occupied in contemplations too dignified for scandal, and +too large for the altercations of a vestry, or the politics of an +election-borough. + +A short time before the dances began, Mr. Tyrrel went up to his fair +inamorata, and entered into some trifling conversation with her to fill +up the time, as intending in a few minutes to lead her forward to the +field. He had accustomed himself to neglect the ceremony of soliciting +beforehand a promise in his favour, as not supposing it possible that +any one would dare dispute his behests; and, had it been otherwise, he +would have thought the formality unnecessary in this case, his general +preference to Miss Hardingham being notorious. + +While he was thus engaged, Mr. Falkland came up. Mr. Tyrrel always +regarded him with aversion and loathing. Mr. Falkland, however, slided +in a graceful and unaffected manner into the conversation already begun; +and the animated ingenuousness of his manner was such, as might for the +time have disarmed the devil of his malice. Mr. Tyrrel probably +conceived that his accosting Miss Hardingham was an accidental piece of +general ceremony, and expected every moment when he would withdraw to +another part of the room. + +The company now began to be in motion for the dance, and Mr. Falkland +signified as much to Miss Hardingham. "Sir," interrupted Mr. Tyrrel +abruptly, "that lady is my partner."--"I believe not, sir: that lady has +been so obliging as to accept my invitation."--"I tell you, sir, no. +Sir, I have an interest in that lady's affections; and I will suffer no +man to intrude upon my claims."--"The lady's affections are not the +subject of the present question."--"Sir, it is to no purpose to parley. +Make room, sir!"--Mr. Falkland gently repelled his antagonist. "Mr. +Tyrrel!" returned he, with some firmness, "let us have no altercation in +this business: the master of the ceremonies is the proper person to +decide in a difference of this sort, if we cannot adjust it: we can +neither of us intend to exhibit our valour before the ladies, and shall +therefore cheerfully submit to his verdict."--"Damn me, sir, if I +understand--" "Softly, Mr. Tyrrel; I intended you no offence. But, sir, +no man shall prevent my asserting that to which I have once acquired a +claim!" + +Mr. Falkland uttered these words with the most unruffled temper in the +world. The tone in which he spoke had acquired elevation, but neither +roughness nor impatience. There was a fascination in his manner that +made the ferociousness of his antagonist subside into impotence. Miss +Hardingham had begun to repent of her experiment, but her alarm was +speedily quieted by the dignified composure of her new partner. Mr. +Tyrrel walked away without answering a word. He muttered curses as he +went, which the laws of honour did not oblige Mr. Falkland to overhear, +and which indeed it would have been no easy task to have overheard with +accuracy. Mr. Tyrrel would not, perhaps, have so easily given up his +point, had not his own good sense presently taught him, that, however +eager he might be for revenge, this was not the ground he should desire +to occupy. But, though he could not openly resent this rebellion against +his authority, he brooded over it in the recesses of a malignant mind; +and it was evident enough that he was accumulating materials for a +bitter account, to which he trusted his adversary should one day be +brought. + + + + +CHAPTER IV. + + +This was only one out of innumerable instances, that every day seemed to +multiply, of petty mortifications which Mr. Tyrrel was destined to +endure on the part of Mr. Falkland. In all of them Mr. Falkland +conducted himself with such unaffected propriety, as perpetually to add +to the stock of his reputation. The more Mr. Tyrrel struggled with his +misfortune, the more conspicuous and inveterate it became. A thousand +times he cursed his stars, which took, as he apprehended, a malicious +pleasure in making Mr. Falkland, at every turn, the instrument of his +humiliation. Smarting under a succession of untoward events, he +appeared to feel, in the most exquisite manner, the distinctions paid to +his adversary, even in those points in which he had not the slightest +pretensions. An instance of this now occurred. + +Mr. Clare, a poet whose works have done immortal honour to the country +that produced him, had lately retired, after a life spent in the +sublimest efforts of genius, to enjoy the produce of his economy, and +the reputation he had acquired, in this very neighbourhood. Such an +inmate was looked up to by the country gentlemen with a degree of +adoration. They felt a conscious pride in recollecting that the boast of +England was a native of their vicinity; and they were by no means +deficient in gratitude when they saw him, who had left them an +adventurer, return into the midst of them, in the close of his days, +crowned with honours and opulence. The reader is acquainted with his +works: he has, probably, dwelt upon them with transport; and I need not +remind him of their excellence: but he is, perhaps, a stranger to his +personal qualifications; he does not know that his productions were +scarcely more admirable than his conversation. In company he seemed to +be the only person ignorant of the greatness of his fame. To the world +his writings will long remain a kind of specimen of what the human mind +is capable of performing; but no man perceived their defects so acutely +as he, or saw so distinctly how much yet remained to be effected: he +alone appeared to look upon his works with superiority and indifference. +One of the features that most eminently distinguished him was a +perpetual suavity of manners, a comprehensiveness of mind, that regarded +the errors of others without a particle of resentment, and made it +impossible for any one to be his enemy. He pointed out to men their +mistakes with frankness and unreserve, his remonstrances produced +astonishment and conviction, but without uneasiness, in the party to +whom they were addressed: they felt the instrument that was employed to +correct their irregularities, but it never mangled what it was intended +to heal. Such were the moral qualities that distinguished him among his +acquaintance. The intellectual accomplishments he exhibited were, +principally, a tranquil and mild enthusiasm, and a richness of +conception which dictated spontaneously to his tongue, and flowed with +so much ease, that it was only by retrospect you could be made aware of +the amazing variety of ideas that had been presented. + +Mr. Clare certainly found few men in this remote situation that were +capable of participating in his ideas and amusements. It has been among +the weaknesses of great men to fly to solitude, and converse with woods +and groves, rather than with a circle of strong and comprehensive minds +like their own. From the moment of Mr. Falkland's arrival in the +neighbourhood, Mr. Clare distinguished him in the most flattering +manner. To so penetrating a genius there was no need of long experience +and patient observation to discover the merits and defects of any +character that presented itself. The materials of his judgment had long +since been accumulated; and, at the close of so illustrious a life, he +might almost be said to see through nature at a glance. What wonder that +he took some interest in a mind in a certain degree congenial with his +own? But to Mr. Tyrrel's diseased imagination, every distinction +bestowed on his neighbour seemed to be expressly intended as an insult +to him. On the other hand, Mr. Clare, though gentle and benevolent in +his remonstrances to a degree that made the taking offence impossible, +was by no means parsimonious of praise, or slow to make use of the +deference that was paid him, for the purpose of procuring justice to +merit. + +It happened at one of those public meetings at which Mr. Falkland and +Mr. Tyrrel were present, that the conversation, in one of the most +numerous sets into which the company was broken, turned upon the +poetical talents of the former. A lady, who was present, and was +distinguished for the acuteness of her understanding, said, she had been +favoured with a sight of a poem he had just written, entitled _An Ode to +the Genius of Chivalry_, which appeared to her of exquisite merit. The +curiosity of the company was immediately excited, and the lady added, +she had a copy in her pocket, which was much at their service, provided +its being thus produced would not be disagreeable to the author. The +whole circle immediately entreated Mr. Falkland to comply with their +wishes, and Mr. Clare, who was one of the company, enforced their +petition. Nothing gave this gentleman so much pleasure as to have an +opportunity of witnessing and doing justice to the exhibition of +intellectual excellence. Mr. Falkland had no false modesty or +affectation, and therefore readily yielded his consent. + +Mr. Tyrrel accidentally sat at the extremity of this circle. It cannot +be supposed that the turn the conversation had taken was by any means +agreeable to him. He appeared to wish to withdraw himself, but there +seemed to be some unknown power that, as it were by enchantment, +retained him in his place, and made him consent to drink to the dregs +the bitter potion which envy had prepared for him. + +The poem was read to the rest of the company by Mr. Clare, whose +elocution was scarcely inferior to his other accomplishments. +Simplicity, discrimination, and energy constantly attended him in the +act of reading, and it is not easy to conceive a more refined delight +than fell to the lot of those who had the good fortune to be his +auditors. The beauties of Mr. Falkland's poem were accordingly exhibited +with every advantage. The successive passions of the author were +communicated to the hearer. What was impetuous, and what was solemn, +were delivered with a responsive feeling, and a flowing and unlaboured +tone. The pictures conjured up by the creative fancy of the poet were +placed full to view, at one time overwhelming the soul with +superstitious awe, and at another transporting it with luxuriant beauty. + +The character of the hearers upon this occasion has already been +described. They were, for the most part, plain, unlettered, and of +little refinement. Poetry in general they read, when read at all, from +the mere force of imitation, and with few sensations of pleasure; but +this poem had a peculiar vein of glowing inspiration. This very poem +would probably have been seen by many of them with little effect; but +the accents of Mr. Clare carried it home to the heart. He ended: and, as +the countenances of his auditors had before sympathised with the +passions of the composition, so now they emulated each other in +declaring their approbation. Their sensations were of a sort to which +they were little accustomed. One spoke, and another followed by a sort +of uncontrollable impulse; and the rude and broken manner of their +commendations rendered them the more singular and remarkable. But what +was least to be endured was the behaviour of Mr. Clare. He returned the +manuscript to the lady from whom he had received it, and then, +addressing Mr. Falkland, said with emphasis and animation, "Ha! this is +as it should be. It is of the right stamp. I have seen too many hard +essays strained from the labour of a pedant, and pastoral ditties +distressed in lack of a meaning. They are such as you sir, that we want. +Do not forget, however, that the Muse was not given to add refinements +to idleness, but for the highest and most invaluable purposes. Act up to +the magnitude of your destiny." + +A moment after, Mr. Clare quitted his seat, and with Mr. Falkland and +two or three more withdrew. As soon as they were gone, Mr. Tyrrel edged +further into the circle. He had sat silent so long that he seemed ready +to burst with gall and indignation. "Mighty pretty verses!" said he, +half talking to himself, and not addressing any particular person: "why, +ay, the verses are well enough. Damnation! I should like to know what a +ship-load of such stuff is good for." + +"Why, surely," said the lady who had introduced Mr. Falkland's Ode on +the present occasion, "you must allow that poetry is an agreeable and +elegant amusement." + +"Elegant, quotha!--Why, look at this Falkland! A puny bit of a thing! In +the devil's name, madam, do you think he would write poetry if he could +do any thing better?" + +The conversation did not stop here. The lady expostulated. Several other +persons, fresh from the sensation they had felt, contributed their +share. Mr. Tyrrel grew more violent in his invectives, and found ease in +uttering them. The persons who were able in any degree to check his +vehemence were withdrawn. One speaker after another shrunk back into +silence, too timid to oppose, or too indolent to contend with, the +fierceness of his passion. He found the appearance of his old +ascendancy; but he felt its deceitfulness and uncertainty, and was +gloomily dissatisfied. + +In his return from this assembly he was accompanied by a young man, +whom similitude of manners had rendered one of his principal confidents, +and whose road home was in part the same as his own. One might have +thought that Mr. Tyrrel had sufficiently vented his spleen in the +dialogue he had just been holding. But he was unable to dismiss from his +recollection the anguish he had endured. "Damn Falkland!" said he. "What +a pitiful scoundrel is here to make all this bustle about! But women and +fools always will be fools; there is no help for that! Those that set +them on have most to answer for; and most of all, Mr. Clare. He is a man +that ought to know something of the world, and past being duped by +gewgaws and tinsel. He seemed, too, to have some notion of things: I +should not have suspected him of hallooing to a cry of mongrels without +honesty or reason. But the world is all alike. Those that seem better +than their neighbours, are only more artful. They mean the same thing, +though they take a different road. He deceived me for a while, but it is +all out now. They are the makers of the mischief. Fools might blunder, +but they would not persist, if people that ought to set them right did +not encourage them to go wrong." + +A few days after this adventure Mr. Tyrrel was surprised to receive a +visit from Mr. Falkland. Mr. Falkland proceeded, without ceremony, to +explain the motive of his coming. + +"Mr. Tyrrel," said he, "I am come to have an amicable explanation with +you." + +"Explanation! What is my offence?" + +"None in the world, sir; and for that reason I conceive this the fittest +time to come to a right understanding." + +"You are in a devil of a hurry, sir. Are you clear that this haste will +not mar, instead of make an understanding?" + +"I think I am, sir. I have great faith in the purity of my intentions, +and I will not doubt, when you perceive the view with which I come, that +you will willingly co-operate with it." + +"Mayhap, Mr. Falkland, we may not agree about that. One man thinks one +way, and another man thinks another. Mayhap I do not think I have any +great reason to be pleased with you already." + +"It may be so. I cannot, however, charge myself with having given you +reason to be displeased." + +"Well, sir, you have no right to put me out of humour with myself. If +you come to play upon me, and try what sort of a fellow you shall have +to deal with, damn me if you shall have any reason to hug yourself upon +the experiment." + +"Nothing, sir, is more easy for us than to quarrel. If you desire that, +there is no fear that you will find opportunities." + +"Damn me, sir, if I do not believe you are come to bully me." + +"Mr. Tyrrel! sir--have a care!" + +"Of what, sir!--Do you threaten me? Damn my soul! who are you? what do +you come here for?" + +The fieriness of Mr. Tyrrel brought Mr. Falkland to his recollection. + +"I am wrong," said he. "I confess it. I came for purposes of peace. With +that view I have taken the liberty to visit you. Whatever therefore +might be my feelings upon another occasion, I am bound to suppress them +now." + +"Ho!--Well, sir: and what have you further to offer?" + +"Mr. Tyrrel," proceeded Mr. Falkland, "you will readily imagine that +the cause that brought me was not a slight one. I would not have +troubled you with a visit, but for important reasons. My coming is a +pledge how deeply I am myself impressed with what I have to communicate. + +"We are in a critical situation. We are upon the brink of a whirlpool +which, if once it get hold of us, will render all further deliberation +impotent. An unfortunate jealousy seems to have insinuated itself +between us, which I would willingly remove; and I come to ask your +assistance. We are both of us nice of temper; we are both apt to kindle, +and warm of resentment. Precaution in this stage can be dishonourable to +neither; the time may come when we shall wish we had employed it, and +find it too late. Why should we be enemies? Our tastes are different; +our pursuits need not interfere. We both of us amply possess the means +of happiness; We may be respected by all, and spend a long life of +tranquillity and enjoyment. Will it be wise in us to exchange this +prospect for the fruits of strife? A strife between persons with our +peculiarities and our weaknesses, includes consequences that I shudder +to think of. I fear, sir, that it is pregnant with death at least to one +of us, and with misfortune and remorse to the survivor." + +"Upon my soul, you are a strange man! Why trouble me with your +prophecies and forebodings?" + +"Because it is necessary to your happiness! Because it becomes me to +tell you of our danger now, rather than wait till my character will +allow this tranquillity no longer! + +"By quarrelling we shall but imitate the great mass of mankind, who +could easily quarrel in our place. Let us do better. Let us show that we +have the magnanimity to contemn petty misunderstandings. By thus +judging we shall do ourselves most substantial honour. By a contrary +conduct we shall merely present a comedy for the amusement of our +acquaintance." + +"Do you think so? there may be something in that. Damn me, if I consent +to be the jest of any man living." + +"You are right, Mr. Tyrrel. Let us each act in the manner best +calculated to excite respect. We neither of us wish to change roads; let +us each suffer the other to pursue his own track unmolested. Be this our +compact; and by mutual forbearance let us preserve mutual peace." + +Saying this, Mr. Falkland offered his hand to Mr. Tyrrel in token of +fellowship. But the gesture was too significant. The wayward rustic, who +seemed to have been somewhat impressed by what had preceded, taken as he +now was by surprise, shrunk back. Mr. Falkland was again ready to take +fire upon this new slight, but he checked himself. + +"All this is very unaccountable," cried Mr. Tyrrel. "What the devil can +have made you so forward, if you had not some sly purpose to answer, by +which I am to be overreached?" + +"My purpose," replied Mr. Falkland, "is a manly and an honest purpose. +Why should you refuse a proposition dictated by reason, and an equal +regard to the interest of each?" + +Mr. Tyrrel had had an opportunity for pause, and fell back into his +habitual character. + +"Well, sir, in all this I must own there is some frankness. Now I will +return you like for like. It is no matter how I came by it, my temper is +rough, and will not be controlled. Mayhap you may think it is a +weakness, but I do not desire to see it altered. Till you came, I found +myself very well: I liked my neighbours, and my neighbours humoured me. +But now the case is entirely altered; and, as long as I cannot stir +abroad without meeting with some mortification in which you are directly +or remotely concerned, I am determined to hate you. Now, sir, if you +will only go out of the county or the kingdom, to the devil if you +please, so as I may never hear of you any more, I will promise never to +quarrel with you as long as I live. Your rhymes and your rebusses, your +quirks and your conundrums, may then be every thing that is grand for +what I care." + +"Mr. Tyrrel, be reasonable! Might not I as well desire you to leave the +county, as you desire me? I come to you, not as to a master, but an +equal. In the society of men we must have something to endure, as well +as to enjoy. No man must think that the world was made for him. Let us +take things as we find them; and accommodate ourselves as we can to +unavoidable circumstances." + +"True, sir; all this is fine talking. But I return to my text: we are as +God made us. I am neither a philosopher nor a poet, to set out upon a +wild-goose chase of making myself a different man from what you find me. +As for consequences, what must be must be. As we brew we must bake. And +so, do you see? I shall not trouble myself about what is to be, but +stand up to it with a stout heart when it comes. Only this I can tell +you, that as long as I find you thrust into my dish every day I shall +hate you as bad as senna and valerian. And damn me, if I do not think I +hate you the more for coming to-day in this pragmatical way, when nobody +sent for you, on purpose to show how much wiser you are than all the +world besides." + +"Mr. Tyrrel, I have done. I foresaw consequences, and came as a friend. +I had hoped that, by mutual explanation, we should have come to a better +understanding. I am disappointed; but, perhaps, when you coolly reflect +on what has passed, you will give me credit for my intentions, and think +that my proposal was not an unreasonable one." + +Having said this, Mr. Falkland departed. Through the interview he, no +doubt, conducted himself in a way that did him peculiar credit. Yet the +warmth of his temper could not be entirely suppressed: and even when he +was most exemplary, there was an apparent loftiness in his manner that +was calculated to irritate; and the very grandeur with which he +suppressed his passions, operated indirectly as a taunt to his opponent. +The interview was prompted by the noblest sentiments; but it +unquestionably served to widen the breach it was intended to heal. + +For Mr. Tyrrel, he had recourse to his old expedient, and unburthened +the tumult of his thoughts to his confidential friend. "This," cried he, +"is a new artifice of the fellow, to prove his imagined superiority. We +knew well enough that he had the gift of the gab. To be sure, if the +world were to be governed by words, he would be in the right box. Oh, +yes, he had it all hollow! But what signifies prating? Business must be +done in another guess way than that. I wonder what possessed me that I +did not kick him! But that is all to come. This is only a new debt +added to the score, which he shall one day richly pay. This Falkland +haunts me like a demon. I cannot wake but I think of him. I cannot sleep +but I see him. He poisons all my pleasures. I should be glad to see him +torn with tenter-hooks, and to grind his heart-strings with my teeth. I +shall know no joy till I see him ruined. There may be some things right +about him; but he is my perpetual torment. The thought of him hangs +like a dead weight upon my heart, and I have a right to shake it off. +Does he think I will feel all that I endure for nothing?" + +In spite of the acerbity of Mr. Tyrrel's feelings, it is probable, +however, he did some justice to his rival. He regarded him, indeed, with +added dislike; but he no longer regarded him as a despicable foe. He +avoided his encounter; he forbore to treat him with random hostility; he +seemed to lie in wait for his victim, and to collect his venom for a +mortal assault. + + + + +CHAPTER V. + + +It was not long after that a malignant distemper broke out in the +neighbourhood, which proved fatal to many of the inhabitants, and was of +unexampled rapidity in its effects. One of the first persons that was +seized with it was Mr. Clare. It may be conceived, what grief and alarm +this incident spread through the vicinity. Mr. Clare was considered by +them as something more than mortal. The equanimity of his behaviour, his +unassuming carriage, his exuberant benevolence and goodness of heart, +joined with his talents, his inoffensive wit, and the comprehensiveness +of his intelligence, made him the idol of all that knew him. In the +scene of his rural retreat, at least, he had no enemy. All mourned the +danger that now threatened him. He appeared to have had the prospect of +long life, and of going down to his grave full of years and of honour. +Perhaps these appearances were deceitful. Perhaps the intellectual +efforts he had made, which were occasionally more sudden, violent, and +unintermitted, than a strict regard to health would have dictated, had +laid the seed of future disease. But a sanguine observer would +infallibly have predicted, that his temperate habits, activity of mind, +and unabated cheerfulness, would be able even to keep death at bay for a +time, and baffle the attacks of distemper, provided their approach were +not uncommonly rapid and violent. The general affliction, therefore, was +doubly pungent upon the present occasion. + +But no one was so much affected as Mr. Falkland. Perhaps no man so well +understood the value of the life that was now at stake. He immediately +hastened to the spot; but he found some difficulty in gaining admission. +Mr. Clare, aware of the infectious nature of his disease, had given +directions that as few persons as possible should approach him. Mr. +Falkland sent up his name. He was told that he was included in the +general orders. He was not, however, of a temper to be easily repulsed; +he persisted with obstinacy, and at length carried his point, being only +reminded in the first instance to employ those precautions which +experience has proved most effectual for counteracting infection. + +He found Mr. Clare in his bed-chamber, but not in bed. He was sitting in +his night-gown at a bureau near the window. His appearance was composed +and cheerful, but death was in his countenance. "I had a great +inclination, Falkland," said he, "not to have suffered you to come in; +and yet there is not a person in the world it could give me more +pleasure to see. But, upon second thoughts, I believe there are few +people that could run into a danger of this kind with a better prospect +of escaping. In your case, at least, the garrison will not, I trust, be +taken through the treachery of the commander. I cannot tell how it is +that I, who can preach wisdom to you, have myself been caught. But do +not be discouraged by my example. I had no notice of my danger, or I +would have acquitted myself better." + +Mr. Falkland having once established himself in the apartment of his +friend, would upon no terms consent to retire. Mr. Clare considered that +there was perhaps less danger in this choice, than in the frequent +change from the extremes of a pure to a tainted air, and desisted from +expostulation. "Falkland," said he, "when you came in, I had just +finished making my will. I was not pleased with what I had formerly +drawn up upon that subject, and I did not choose in my present situation +to call in an attorney. In fact, it would be strange if a man of sense, +with pure and direct intentions, should not be able to perform such a +function for himself." + +Mr. Clare continued to act in the same easy and disengaged manner as in +perfect health. To judge from the cheerfulness of his tone and the +firmness of his manner, the thought would never once have occurred that +he was dying. He walked, he reasoned, he jested, in a way that argued +the most perfect self-possession. But his appearance changed perceptibly +for the worse every quarter of an hour. Mr. Falkland kept his eye +perpetually fixed upon him, with mingled sentiments of anxiety and +admiration. + +"Falkland," said he, after having appeared for a short period absorbed +in thought, "I feel that I am dying. This is a strange distemper of +mine. Yesterday I seemed in perfect health, and to-morrow I shall be an +insensible corpse. How curious is the line that separates life and death +to mortal men! To be at one moment active, gay, penetrating, with stores +of knowledge at one's command, capable of delighting, instructing, and +animating mankind, and the next, lifeless and loathsome, an incumbrance +upon the face of the earth! Such is the history of many men, and such +will be mine. + +"I feel as if I had yet much to do in the world; but it will not be. I +must be contented with what is past. It is in vain that I muster all my +spirits to my heart. The enemy is too mighty and too merciless for me; +he will not give me time so much as to breathe. These things are not yet +at least in our power: they are parts of a great series that is +perpetually flowing. The general welfare, the great business of the +universe, will go on, though I bear no further share in promoting it. +That task is reserved for younger strengths, for you, Falkland, and such +as you. We should be contemptible indeed if the prospect of human +improvement did not yield us a pure and perfect delight, independently +of the question of our existing to partake of it. Mankind would have +little to envy to future ages, if they had all enjoyed a serenity as +perfect as mine has been for the latter half of my existence." + +Mr. Clare sat up through the whole day, indulging himself in easy and +cheerful exertions, which were perhaps better calculated to refresh and +invigorate the frame, than if he had sought repose in its direct form. +Now and then he was visited with a sudden pang; but it was no sooner +felt, than he seemed to rise above it, and smiled at the impotence of +these attacks. They might destroy him, but they could not disturb. Three +or four times he was bedewed with profuse sweats; and these again were +succeeded by an extreme dryness and burning heat of the skin. He was +next covered with small livid spots: symptoms of shivering followed, but +these he drove away with a determined resolution. He then became +tranquil and composed, and, after some time, decided to go to bed, it +being already night. "Falkland," said he, pressing his hand, "the task +of dying is not so difficult as some imagine. When one looks back from +the brink of it, one wonders that so total a subversion can take place +at so easy a price." + +He had now been some time in bed, and, as every thing was still, Mr. +Falkland hoped that he slept; but in that he was mistaken. Presently Mr. +Clare threw back the curtain, and looked in the countenance of his +friend. "I cannot sleep," said he. "No, if I could sleep, it would be +the same thing as to recover; and I am destined to have the worst in +this battle. + +"Falkland, I have been thinking about you. I do not know any one whose +future usefulness I contemplate with greater hope. Take care of +yourself. Do not let the world be defrauded of your virtues. I am +acquainted with your weakness as well as your strength. You have an +impetuosity, and an impatience of imagined dishonour, that, if once set +wrong, may make you as eminently mischievous as you will otherwise be +useful. Think seriously of exterminating this error! + +"But if I cannot, in the brief expostulation my present situation will +allow, produce this desirable change in you, there is at least one thing +I can do. I can put you upon your guard against a mischief I foresee to +be imminent. Beware of Mr. Tyrrel. Do not commit the mistake of +despising him as an unequal opponent. Petty causes may produce great +mischiefs. Mr. Tyrrel is boisterous, rugged, and unfeeling; and you are +too passionate, too acutely sensible of injury. It would be truly to be +lamented, if a man so inferior, so utterly unworthy to be compared with +you, should be capable of changing your whole history into misery and +guilt. I have a painful presentiment upon my heart, as if something +dreadful would reach you from that quarter. Think of this. I exact no +promise from you. I would not shackle you with the fetters of +superstition; I would have you governed by justice and reason." + +Mr. Falkland was deeply affected with this expostulation. His sense of +the generous attention of Mr. Clare at such a moment, was so great as +almost to deprive him of utterance. He spoke in short sentences, and +with visible effort. "I will behave better," replied he. "Never fear me! +Your admonitions shall not be thrown away upon me." + +Mr. Clare adverted to another subject. "I have made you my executor; you +will not refuse me this last office of friendship. It is but a short +time that I have had the happiness of knowing you; but in that short +time I have examined you well, and seen you thoroughly. Do not +disappoint the sanguine hope I have entertained! + +"I have left some legacies. My former connections, while I lived amidst +the busy haunts of men, as many of them as were intimate, are all of +them dear to me. I have not had time to summon them about me upon the +present occasion, nor did I desire it. The remembrances of me will, I +hope, answer a better purpose than such as are usually thought of on +similar occasions." + +Mr. Clare, having thus unburthened his mind, spoke no more for several +hours. Towards morning Mr. Falkland quietly withdrew the curtain, and +looked at the dying man. His eyes were open, and were now gently turned +towards his young friend. His countenance was sunk, and of a death-like +appearance. "I hope you are better," said Falkland in a half whisper, as +if afraid of disturbing him. Mr. Clare drew his hand from the +bed-clothes, and stretched it forward; Mr. Falkland advanced, and took +hold of it. "Much better," said Mr. Clare, in a voice inward and hardly +articulate; "the struggle is now over; I have finished my part; +farewell! remember!" These were his last words. He lived still a few +hours; his lips were sometimes seen to move; he expired without a groan. + +Mr. Falkland had witnessed the scene with much anxiety. His hopes of a +favourable crisis, and his fear of disturbing the last moments of his +friend, had held him dumb. For the last half hour he had stood up, with +his eyes intently fixed upon Mr. Clare. He witnessed the last gasp, the +last little convulsive motion of the frame. He continued to look; he +sometimes imagined that he saw life renewed. At length he could deceive +himself no longer, and exclaimed with a distracted accent, "And is this +all?" He would have thrown himself upon the body of his friend; the +attendants withheld, and would have forced him into another apartment. +But he struggled from them, and hung fondly over the bed. "Is this the +end of genius, virtue, and excellence? Is the luminary of the world thus +for ever gone? Oh, yesterday! yesterday! Clare, why could not I have +died in your stead? Dreadful moment! Irreparable loss! Lost in the very +maturity and vigour of his mind! Cut off from a usefulness ten thousand +times greater than any he had already exhibited! Oh, his was a mind to +have instructed sages, and guided the moral world! This is all we have +left of him! The eloquence of those lips is gone! The incessant activity +of that heart is still! The best and wisest of men is gone, and the +world is insensible of its loss!" + +Mr. Tyrrel heard the intelligence of Mr. Clare's death with emotion, but +of a different kind. He avowed that he had not forgiven him his partial +attachment to Mr. Falkland, and therefore could not recall his +remembrance with kindness. But if he could have overlooked his past +injustice, sufficient care, it seems, was taken to keep alive his +resentment. "Falkland, forsooth, attended him on his death-bed, as if +nobody else were worthy of his confidential communications." But what +was worst of all was this executorship. "In every thing this pragmatical +rascal throws me behind. Contemptible wretch, that has nothing of the +man about him! Must he perpetually trample upon his betters? Is every +body incapable of saying what kind of stuff a man is made of? caught +with mere outside? choosing the flimsy before the substantial? And upon +his death-bed too? [Mr. Tyrrel with his uncultivated brutality mixed, as +usually happens, certain rude notions of religion.] Sure the sense of +his situation might have shamed him. Poor wretch! his soul has a great +deal to answer for. He has made my pillow uneasy; and, whatever may be +the consequences, it is he we have to thank for them." + +The death of Mr. Clare removed the person who could most effectually +have moderated the animosities of the contending parties, and took away +the great operative check upon the excesses of Mr. Tyrrel. This rustic +tyrant had been held in involuntary restraint by the intellectual +ascendancy of his celebrated neighbour: and, notwithstanding the general +ferocity of his temper, he did not appear till lately to have +entertained a hatred against him. In the short time that had elapsed +from the period in which Mr. Clare had fixed his residence in the +neighbourhood, to that of the arrival of Mr. Falkland from the +Continent, the conduct of Mr. Tyrrel had even shown tokens of +improvement. He would indeed have been better satisfied not to have had +even this intruder into a circle where he had been accustomed to reign. +But with Mr. Clare he could have no rivalship; the venerable character +of Mr. Clare disposed him to submission: this great man seemed to have +survived all the acrimony of contention, and all the jealous subtleties +of a mistaken honour. + +The effects of Mr. Clare's suavity however, so far as related to Mr. +Tyrrel, had been in a certain degree suspended by considerations of +rivalship between this gentleman and Mr. Falkland. And, now that the +influence of Mr. Clare's presence and virtues was entirely removed, Mr. +Tyrrel's temper broke out into more criminal excesses than ever. The +added gloom which Mr. Falkland's neighbourhood inspired, overflowed upon +all his connections; and the new examples of his sullenness and tyranny +which every day afforded, reflected back upon this accumulated and +portentous feud. + + + + +CHAPTER VI. + + +The consequences of all this speedily manifested themselves. The very +next incident in the story was in some degree decisive of the +catastrophe. Hitherto I have spoken only of preliminary matters, +seemingly unconnected with each other, though leading to that state of +mind in both parties which had such fatal effects. But all that remains +is rapid and tremendous. The death-dealing mischief advances with an +accelerated motion, appearing to defy human wisdom and strength to +obstruct its operation. + +The vices of Mr. Tyrrel, in their present state of augmentation, were +peculiarly exercised upon his domestics and dependents. But the +principal sufferer was the young lady mentioned on a former occasion, +the orphan daughter of his father's sister. Miss Melville's mother had +married imprudently, or rather unfortunately, against the consent of her +relations, all of whom had agreed to withdraw their countenance from her +in consequence of that precipitate step. Her husband had turned out to +be no better than an adventurer; had spent her fortune, which in +consequence of the irreconcilableness of her family was less than he +expected, and had broken her heart. Her infant daughter was left without +any resource. In this situation the representations of the people with +whom she happened to be placed, prevailed upon Mrs. Tyrrel, the mother +of the squire, to receive her into her family. In equity, perhaps, she +was entitled to that portion of fortune which her mother had forfeited +by her imprudence, and which had gone to swell the property of the male +representative. But this idea had never entered into the conceptions of +either mother or son. Mrs. Tyrrel conceived that she performed an act of +the most exalted benevolence in admitting Miss Emily into a sort of +equivocal situation, which was neither precisely that of a domestic, nor +yet marked with the treatment that might seem due to one of the family. + +She had not, however, at first been sensible of all the mortifications +that might have been expected from her condition. Mrs. Tyrrel, though +proud and imperious, was not ill-natured. The female, who lived in the +family in the capacity of housekeeper, was a person who had seen better +days, and whose disposition was extremely upright and amiable. She early +contracted a friendship for the little Emily, who was indeed for the +most part committed to her care. Emily, on her side, fully repaid the +affection of her instructress, and learned with great docility the few +accomplishments Mrs. Jakeman was able to communicate. But most of all +she imbibed her cheerful and artless temper, that extracted the +agreeable and encouraging from all events, and prompted her to +communicate her sentiments, which were never of the cynical cast, +without modification or disguise. Besides the advantages Emily derived +from Mrs. Jakeman, she was permitted to take lessons from the masters +who were employed at Tyrrel Place for the instruction of her cousin; and +indeed, as the young gentleman was most frequently indisposed to attend +to them, they would commonly have had nothing to do, had it not been for +the fortunate presence of Miss Melville. Mrs. Tyrrel therefore +encouraged the studies of Emily on that score; in addition to which she +imagined that this living exhibition of instruction might operate as an +indirect allurement to her darling Barnabas, the only species of motive +she would suffer to be presented. Force she absolutely forbade; and of +the intrinsic allurements of literature and knowledge she had no +conception. + +Emily, as she grew up, displayed an uncommon degree of sensibility, +which under her circumstances would have been a source of perpetual +dissatisfaction, had it not been qualified with an extreme sweetness and +easiness of temper. She was far from being entitled to the appellation +of a beauty. Her person was _petite_ and trivial; her complexion +savoured of the _brunette_; and her face was marked with the small-pox, +sufficiently to destroy its evenness and polish, though not enough to +destroy its expression. But, though her appearance was not beautiful, it +did not fail to be in a high degree engaging. Her complexion was at once +healthful and delicate; her long dark eye-brows adapted themselves with +facility to the various conceptions of her mind; and her looks bore the +united impression of an active discernment and a good-humoured +frankness. The instruction she had received, as it was entirely of a +casual nature, exempted her from the evils of untutored ignorance, but +not from a sort of native wildness, arguing a mind incapable of guile +itself, or of suspecting it in others. She amused, without seeming +conscious of the refined sense which her observations contained; or +rather, having never been debauched with applause, she set light by her +own qualifications, and talked from the pure gaiety of a youthful heart +acting upon the stores of a just understanding, and not with any +expectation of being distinguished and admired. + +The death of her aunt made very little change in her situation. This +prudent lady, who would have thought it little less than sacrilege to +have considered Miss Melville as a branch of the stock of the Tyrrels, +took no more notice of her in her will than barely putting her down for +one hundred pounds in a catalogue of legacies to her servants. She had +never been admitted into the intimacy and confidence of Mrs. Tyrrel; and +the young squire, now that she was left under his sole protection, +seemed inclined to treat her with even more liberality than his mother +had done. He had seen her grow up under his eye, and therefore, though +there were but six years difference in their ages, he felt a kind of +paternal interest in her welfare. Habit had rendered her in a manner +necessary to him, and, in every recess from the occupations of the field +and the pleasures of the table, he found himself solitary and forlorn +without the society of Miss Melville. Nearness of kindred, and Emily's +want of personal beauty, prevented him from ever looking on her with the +eyes of desire. Her accomplishments were chiefly of the customary and +superficial kind, dancing and music. Her skill in the first led him +sometimes to indulge her with a vacant corner in his carriage, when he +went to the neighbouring assembly; and, in whatever light he might +himself think proper to regard her, he would have imagined his +chambermaid, introduced by him, entitled to an undoubted place in the +most splendid circle. Her musical talents were frequently employed for +his amusement. She had the honour occasionally of playing him to sleep +after the fatigues of the chase; and, as he had some relish for +harmonious sounds, she was frequently able to soothe him by their means +from the perturbations of which his gloomy disposition was so eminently +a slave. Upon the whole, she might be considered as in some sort his +favourite. She was the mediator to whom his tenants and domestics, when +they had incurred his displeasure, were accustomed to apply; the +privileged companion, that could approach this lion with impunity in the +midst of his roarings. She spoke to him without fear; her solicitations +were always good-natured and disinterested; and when he repulsed her, he +disarmed himself of half his terrors, and was contented to smile at her +presumption. + +Such had been for some years the situation of Miss Melville. Its +precariousness had been beguiled by the uncommon forbearance with which +she was treated by her savage protector. But his disposition, always +brutal, had acquired a gradual accession of ferocity since the +settlement of Mr. Falkland in his neighbourhood. He now frequently +forgot the gentleness with which he had been accustomed to treat his +good-natured cousin. Her little playful arts were not always successful +in softening his rage; and he would sometimes turn upon her +blandishments with an impatient sternness that made her tremble. The +careless ease of her disposition, however, soon effaced these +impressions, and she fell without variation into her old habits. + +A circumstance occurred about this time which gave peculiar strength to +the acrimony of Mr. Tyrrel, and ultimately brought to its close the +felicity that Miss Melville, in spite of the frowns of fortune, had +hitherto enjoyed. Emily was exactly seventeen when Mr. Falkland returned +from the continent. At this age she was peculiarly susceptible of the +charms of beauty, grace, and moral excellence, when united in a person +of the other sex. She was imprudent, precisely because her own heart was +incapable of guile. She had never yet felt the sting of the poverty to +which she was condemned, and had not reflected on the insuperable +distance that custom has placed between the opulent and the poorer +classes of the community. She beheld Mr. Falkland, whenever he was +thrown in her way at any of the public meetings, with admiration; and, +without having precisely explained to herself the sentiments she +indulged, her eyes followed him through all the changes of the scene, +with eagerness and impatience. She did not see him, as the rest of the +assembly did, born to one of the amplest estates in the county, and +qualified to assert his title to the richest heiress. She thought only +of Falkland, with those advantages which were most intimately his own, +and of which no persecution of adverse fortune had the ability to +deprive him. In a word, she was transported when he was present; he was +the perpetual subject of her reveries and her dreams; but his image +excited no sentiment in her mind beyond that of the immediate pleasure +she took in his idea. + +The notice Mr. Falkland bestowed on her in return, appeared sufficiently +encouraging to a mind so full of prepossession as that of Emily. There +was a particular complacency in his looks when directed towards her. He +had said in a company, of which one of the persons present repeated his +remarks to Miss Melville, that she appeared to him amiable and +interesting; that he felt for her unprovided and destitute situation; +and that he should have been glad to be more particular in his attention +to her, had he not been apprehensive of doing her a prejudice in the +suspicious mind of Mr. Tyrrel. All this she considered as the ravishing +condescension of a superior nature; for, if she did not recollect with +sufficient assiduity his gifts of fortune, she was, on the other hand, +filled with reverence for his unrivalled accomplishments. But, while she +thus seemingly disclaimed all comparison between Mr. Falkland and +herself, she probably cherished a confused feeling as if some event, +that was yet in the womb of fate, might reconcile things apparently the +most incompatible. Fraught with these prepossessions, the civilities +that had once or twice occurred in the bustle of a public circle, the +restoring her fan which she had dropped, or the disembarrassing her of +an empty tea-cup, made her heart palpitate, and gave birth to the +wildest chimeras in her deluded imagination. + +About this time an event happened, that helped to give a precise +determination to the fluctuations of Miss Melville's mind. One evening, +a short time after the death of Mr. Clare, Mr. Falkland had been at the +house of his deceased friend in his quality of executor, and, by some +accidents of little intrinsic importance, had been detained three or +four hours later than he expected. He did not set out upon his return +till two o'clock in the morning. At this time, in a situation so remote +from the metropolis, every thing is as silent as it would be in a +region wholly uninhabited. The moon shone bright; and the objects around +being marked with strong variations of light and shade, gave a kind of +sacred solemnity to the scene. Mr. Falkland had taken Collins with him, +the business to be settled at Mr. Clare's being in some respects similar +to that to which this faithful domestic had been accustomed in the +routine of his ordinary service. They had entered into some +conversation, for Mr. Falkland was not then in the habit of obliging the +persons about him by formality and reserve to recollect who he was. The +attractive solemnity of the scene made him break off the talk somewhat +abruptly, that he might enjoy it without interruption. They had not +ridden far, before a hollow wind seemed to rise at a distance, and they +could hear the hoarse roarings of the sea. Presently the sky on one side +assumed the appearance of a reddish brown, and a sudden angle in the +road placed this phenomenon directly before them. As they proceeded, it +became more distinct, and it was at length sufficiently visible that it +was occasioned by a fire. Mr. Falkland put spurs to his horse; and, as +they approached, the object presented every instant a more alarming +appearance. The flames ascended with fierceness; they embraced a large +portion of the horizon; and, as they carried up with them numerous +little fragments of the materials that fed them, impregnated with fire, +and of an extremely bright and luminous colour, they presented some +feeble image of the tremendous eruption of a volcano. + +The flames proceeded from a village directly in their road. There were +eight or ten houses already on fire, and the whole seemed to be +threatened with immediate destruction. The inhabitants were in the +utmost consternation, having had no previous experience of a similar +calamity. They conveyed with haste their moveables and furniture into +the adjoining fields. When any of them had effected this as far as it +could be attempted with safety, they were unable to conceive any further +remedy, but stood wringing their hands, and contemplating the ravages of +the fire in an agony of powerless despair. The water that could be +procured, in any mode practised in that place, was but as a drop +contending with an element in arms. The wind in the mean time was +rising, and the flames spread with more and more rapidity. + +Mr. Falkland contemplated this scene for a few moments, as if ruminating +with himself as to what could be done. He then directed some of the +country people about him to pull down a house, next to one that was +wholly on fire, but which itself was yet untouched. They seemed +astonished at a direction which implied a voluntary destruction of +property, and considered the task as too much in the heart of the danger +to be undertaken. Observing that they were motionless, he dismounted +from his horse, and called upon them in an authoritative voice to follow +him. He ascended the house in an instant, and presently appeared upon +the top of it, as if in the midst of the flames. Having, with the +assistance of two or three of the persons that followed him most +closely, and who by this time had supplied themselves with whatever +tools came next to hand, loosened the support of a stack of chimneys, he +pushed them headlong into the midst of the fire. He passed and repassed +along the roof; and, having set people to work in all parts, descended +in order to see what could be done in any other quarter. At this moment +an elderly woman burst from the midst of a house in flames: the utmost +consternation was painted in her looks; and, as soon as she could +recollect herself enough to have a proper idea of her situation, the +subject of her anxiety seemed, in an instant, to be totally changed. +"Where is my child?" cried she, and cast an anxious and piercing look +among the surrounding crowd. "Oh, she is lost! she is in the midst of +flames! Save her! save her! my child!" She filled the air with +heart-rending shrieks. She turned towards the house. The people that +were near endeavoured to prevent her, but she shook them off in a +moment. She entered the passage; viewed the hideous ruin; and was then +going to plunge into the blazing staircase. Mr. Falkland saw, pursued, +and seized her by the arm; it was Mrs. Jakeman. "Stop!" he cried, with a +voice of grand, yet benevolent authority. "Remain you in the street! I +will seek, and will save her!" Mrs. Jakeman obeyed. He charged the +persons who were near to detain her; he enquired which was the apartment +of Emily. Mrs. Jakeman was upon a visit to a sister who lived in the +village, and had brought Emily along with her. Mr. Falkland ascended a +neighbouring house, and entered that in which Emily was, by a window in +the roof. + +He found her already awaked from her sleep; and, becoming sensible of +her danger, she had that instant wrapped a loose gown round her. Such is +the almost irresistible result of feminine habits; but, having done +this, she examined the surrounding objects with the wildness of despair. +Mr. Falkland entered the chamber. She flew into his arms with the +rapidity of lightning. She embraced and clung to him, with an impulse +that did not wait to consult the dictates of her understanding. Her +emotions were indescribable. In a few short moments she had lived an age +in love. In two minutes Mr. Falkland was again in the street with his +lovely, half-naked burthen in his arms. Having restored her to her +affectionate protector, snatched from the immediate grasp of death, from +which, if he had not, none would have delivered her, he returned to his +former task. By his presence of mind, by his indefatigable humanity and +incessant exertions, he saved three fourths of the village from +destruction. + +The conflagration being at length abated, he sought again Mrs. Jakeman +and Emily, who by this time had obtained a substitute for the garments +she had lost in the fire. He displayed the tenderest solicitude for the +young lady's safety, and directed Collins to go with as much speed as he +could, and send his chariot to attend her. More than an hour elapsed in +this interval. Miss Melville had never seen so much of Mr. Falkland upon +any former occasion; and the spectacle of such humanity, delicacy, +firmness, and justice in the form of man, as he crowded into this small +space, was altogether new to her, and in the highest degree fascinating. +She had a confused feeling as if there had been something indecorous in +her behaviour or appearance, when Mr. Falkland had appeared to her +relief; and this combined with her other emotions to render the whole +critical and intoxicating. + +Emily no sooner arrived at the family mansion, than Mr. Tyrrel ran out +to receive her. He had just heard of the melancholy accident that had +taken place at the village, and was terrified for the safety of his +good-humoured cousin. He displayed those unpremeditated emotions which +are common to almost every individual of the human race. He was greatly +shocked at the suspicion that Emily might possibly have become the +victim of a catastrophe which had thus broken out in the dead of night. +His sensations were of the most pleasing sort when he folded her in his +arms, and fearful apprehension was instantaneously converted into +joyous certainty. Emily no sooner entered under the well known roof than +her spirits were brisk, and her tongue incessant in describing her +danger and her deliverance. Mr. Tyrrel had formerly been tortured with +the innocent eulogiums she pronounced of Mr. Falkland. But these were +lameness itself, compared with the rich and various eloquence that now +flowed from her lips. Love had not the same effect upon her, especially +at the present moment, which it would have had upon a person instructed +to feign a blush, and inured to a consciousness of wrong. She described +his activity and resources, the promptitude with which every thing was +conceived, and the cautious but daring wisdom with which it was +executed. All was fairy-land and enchantment in the tenour of her +artless tale; you saw a beneficent genius surveying and controlling the +whole, but could have no notion of any human means by which his purposes +were effected. + +Mr. Tyrrel listened for a while to these innocent effusions with +patience; he could even bear to hear the man applauded, by whom he had +just obtained so considerable a benefit. But the theme by amplification +became nauseous, and he at length with some roughness put an end to the +tale. Probably, upon recollection, it appeared still more insolent and +intolerable than while it was passing; the sensation of gratitude wore +off, but the hyperbolical praise that had been bestowed still haunted +his memory, and sounded in his ear;--Emily had entered into the +confederacy that disturbed his repose. For herself, she was wholly +unconscious of offence, and upon every occasion quoted Mr. Falkland as +the model of elegant manners and true wisdom. She was a total stranger +to dissimulation; and she could not conceive that any one beheld the +subject of her admiration with less partiality than herself. Her +artless love became more fervent than ever. She flattered herself that +nothing less than a reciprocal passion could have prompted Mr. Falkland +to the desperate attempt of saving her from the flames; and she trusted +that this passion would speedily declare itself, as well as induce the +object of her adoration to overlook her comparative unworthiness. + +Mr. Tyrrel endeavoured at first with some moderation to check Miss +Melville in her applauses, and to convince her by various tokens that +the subject was disagreeable to him. He was accustomed to treat her with +kindness. Emily, on her part, was disposed to yield an unreluctant +obedience, and therefore it was not difficult to restrain her. But upon +the very next occasion her favourite topic would force its way to her +lips. Her obedience was the acquiescence of a frank and benevolent +heart; but it was the most difficult thing in the world to inspire her +with fear. Conscious herself that she would not hurt a worm, she could +not conceive that any one would harbour cruelty and rancour against her. +Her temper had preserved her from obstinate contention with the persons +under whose protection she was placed; and, as her compliance was +unhesitating, she had no experience of a severe and rigorous treatment. +As Mr. Tyrrel's objection to the very name of Falkland became more +palpable and uniform, Miss Melville increased in her precaution. She +would stop herself in the half-pronounced sentences that were meant to +his praise. This circumstance had necessarily an ungracious effect; it +was a cutting satire upon the imbecility of her kinsman. Upon these +occasions she would sometimes venture upon a good-humoured +expostulation:--"Dear sir! well, I wonder how you can be so ill-natured! +I am sure Mr. Falkland would do you any good office in the +world:"--till she was checked by some gesture of impatience and +fierceness. + +At length she wholly conquered her heedlessness and inattention. But it +was too late. Mr. Tyrrel already suspected the existence of that passion +which she had thoughtlessly imbibed. His imagination, ingenious in +torment, suggested to him all the different openings in conversation, in +which she would have introduced the praise of Mr. Falkland, had she not +been placed under this unnatural restraint. Her present reserve upon the +subject was even more insufferable than her former loquacity. All his +kindness for this unhappy orphan gradually subsided. Her partiality for +the man who was the object of his unbounded abhorrence, appeared to him +as the last persecution of a malicious destiny. He figured himself as +about to be deserted by every creature in human form; all men, under the +influence of a fatal enchantment, approving only what was sophisticated +and artificial, and holding the rude and genuine offspring of nature in +mortal antipathy. Impressed with these gloomy presages, he saw Miss +Melville with no sentiments but those of rancorous aversion; and, +accustomed as he was to the uncontrolled indulgence of his propensities, +he determined to wreak upon her a signal revenge. + + + + +CHAPTER VII. + + +Mr. Tyrrel consulted his old confident respecting the plan he should +pursue; who, sympathising as he did in the brutality and insolence of +his friend, had no idea that an insignificant girl, without either +wealth or beauty, ought to be allowed for a moment to stand in the way +of the gratifications of a man of Mr. Tyrrel's importance. The first +idea of her now unrelenting kinsman was to thrust her from his doors, +and leave her to seek her bread as she could. But he was conscious that +this proceeding would involve him in considerable obloquy; and he at +length fixed upon a scheme which, at the same time that he believed it +would sufficiently shelter his reputation, would much more certainly +secure her mortification and punishment. + +For this purpose he fixed upon a young man of twenty, the son of one +Grimes, who occupied a small farm, the property of his confident. This +fellow he resolved to impose as a husband on Miss Melville, who, he +shrewdly suspected, guided by the tender sentiments she had +unfortunately conceived for Mr. Falkland, would listen with reluctance +to any matrimonial proposal. Grimes he selected as being in all respects +the diametrical reverse of Mr. Falkland. He was not precisely a lad of +vicious propensities, but in an inconceivable degree boorish and +uncouth. His complexion was scarcely human; his features were coarse, +and strangely discordant and disjointed from each other. His lips were +thick, and the tone of his voice broad and unmodulated. His legs were of +equal size from one end to the other, and his feet misshapen and clumsy. +He had nothing spiteful or malicious in his disposition, but he was a +total stranger to tenderness; he could not feel for those refinements in +others, of which he had no experience in himself. He was an expert +boxer: his inclination led him to such amusements as were most +boisterous; and he delighted in a sort of manual sarcasm, which he could +not conceive to be very injurious, as it left no traces behind it. His +general manners were noisy and obstreperous; inattentive to others; and +obstinate and unyielding, not from any cruelty and ruggedness of +temper, but from an incapacity to conceive those finer feelings, that +make so large a part of the history of persons who are cast in a gentler +mould. + +Such was the uncouth and half-civilised animal, which the industrious +malice of Mr. Tyrrel fixed upon as most happily adapted to his purpose. +Emily had hitherto been in an unusual degree exempted from the +oppression of despotism. Her happy insignificance had served her as a +protection. No one thought it worth his while to fetter her with those +numerous petty restrictions with which the daughters of opulence are +commonly tormented. She had the wildness, as well as the delicate frame, +of the bird that warbles unmolested in its native groves. + +When therefore she heard from her kinsman the proposal of Mr. Grimes for +a husband, she was for a moment silent with astonishment at so +unexpected a suggestion. But as soon as she recovered her speech, she +replied, "No, sir, I do not want a husband." + +"You do! Are not you always hankering after the men? It is high time you +should be settled." + +"Mr. Grimes! No, indeed! when I do have a husband, it shall not be such +a man as Mr. Grimes neither." + +"Be silent! How dare you give yourself such unaccountable liberties?" + +"Lord, I wonder what I should do with him. You might as well give me +your great rough water-dog, and bid me make him a silk cushion to lie in +my dressing-room. Besides, sir, Grimes is a common labouring man, and I +am sure I have always heard my aunt say that ours is a very great +family." + +"It is a lie! Our family! have you the impudence to think yourself one +of our family?" + +"Why, sir, was not your grandpapa my grandpapa? How then can we be of a +different family?" + +"From the strongest reason in the world. You are the daughter of a +rascally Scotchman, who spent every shilling of my aunt Lucy's fortune, +and left you a beggar. You have got an hundred pounds, and Grimes's +father promises to give him as much. How dare you look down upon your +equals?" + +"Indeed, sir, I am not proud. But, indeed and indeed, I can never love +Mr. Grimes. I am very happy as I am: why should I be married?" + +"Silence your prating! Grimes will be here this afternoon. Look that you +behave well to him. If you do not, he will remember and repay, when you +least like it." + +"Nay, I am sure, sir--you are not in earnest?" + +"Not in earnest! Damn me, but we will see that. I can tell what you +would be at. You had rather be Mr. Falkland's miss, than the wife of a +plain downright yeoman. But I shall take care of you.--Ay, this comes of +indulgence. You must be taken down, miss. You must be taught the +difference between high-flown notions and realities. Mayhap you may take +it a little in dudgeon or so; but never mind that. Pride always wants a +little smarting. If you should be brought to shame, it is I that shall +bear the blame of it." + +The tone in which Mr. Tyrrel spoke was so different from any thing to +which Miss Melville had been accustomed, that she felt herself wholly +unable to determine what construction to put upon it. Sometimes she +thought he had really formed a plan for imposing upon her a condition +that she could not bear so much as to think of. But presently she +rejected this idea as an unworthy imputation upon her kinsman, and +concluded that it was only his way, and that all he meant was to try +her. To be resolved however, she determined to consult her constant +adviser, Mrs. Jakeman, and accordingly repeated to her what had passed. +Mrs. Jakeman saw the whole in a very different light from that in which +Emily had conceived it, and trembled for the future peace of her beloved +ward. + +"Lord bless me, my dear mamma!" cried Emily, (this was the appellation +she delighted to bestow upon the good housekeeper,) "you cannot think +so? But I do not care. I will never marry Grimes, happen what will." + +"But how will you help yourself? My master will oblige you." + +"Nay, now you think you are talking to a child indeed. It is I am to +have the man, not Mr. Tyrrel. Do you think I will let any body else +choose a husband for me? I am not such a fool as that neither." + +"Ah, Emily! you little know the disadvantages of your situation. Your +cousin is a violent man, and perhaps will turn you out of doors, if you +oppose him." + +"Oh, mamma! it is very wicked of you to say so. I am sure Mr. Tyrrel is +a very good man, though he be a little cross now and then. He knows very +well that I am right to have a will of my own in such a thing as this, +and nobody is punished for doing what is right." + +"Nobody ought, my dear child. But there are very wicked and tyrannical +men in the world." + +"Well, well, I will never believe my cousin is one of these." + +"I hope he is not." + +"And if he were, what then? To be sure I should he very sorry to make +him angry." + +"What then! Why then my poor Emily would be a beggar. Do you think I +could bear to see that?" + +"No, no. Mr. Tyrrel has just told me that I have a hundred pounds. But +if I had no fortune, is not that the case with a thousand other folks? +Why should I grieve, for what they bear and are merry? Do not make +yourself uneasy, mamma. I am determined that I will do any thing rather +than marry Grimes; that is what I will." + +Mrs. Jakeman could not bear the uneasy state of suspense in which this +conversation left her mind, and went immediately to the squire to have +her doubts resolved. The manner in which she proposed the question, +sufficiently indicated the judgment she had formed of the match. + +"That is true," said Mr. Tyrrel, "I wanted to speak to you about this +affair. The girl has got unaccountable notions in her head, that will be +the ruin of her. You perhaps can tell where she had them. But, be that +as it will, it is high time something should be done. The shortest way +is the best, and to keep things well while they are well. In short, I am +determined she shall marry this lad: you do not know any harm of him, do +you? You have a good deal of influence with her, and I desire, do you +see, that you will employ it to lead her to her good: you had best, I +can tell you. She is a pert vixen! By and by she would be a whore, and +at last no better than a common trull, and rot upon a dunghill, if I +were not at all these pains to save her from destruction. I would make +her an honest farmer's wife, and my pretty miss cannot bear the thoughts +of it!" + +In the afternoon Grimes came according to appointment, and was left +alone with the young lady. + +"Well, miss," said he, "it seems the squire has a mind to make us man +and wife. For my part, I cannot say I should have thought of it. But, +being as how the squire has broke the ice, if so be as you like of the +match, why I am your man. Speak the word; a nod is as good as a wink to +a blind horse." + +Emily was already sufficiently mortified at the unexpected proposal of +Mr. Tyrrel. She was confounded at the novelty of the situation, and +still more at the uncultivated rudeness of her lover, which even +exceeded her expectation. This confusion was interpreted by Grimes into +diffidence. + +"Come, come, never be cast down. Put a good face upon it. What though? +My first sweetheart was Bet Butterfield, but what of that? What must be +must be; grief will never fill the belly. She was a fine strapping +wench, that is the truth of it! five foot ten inches, and as stout as a +trooper. Oh, she would do a power of work! Up early and down late; +milked ten cows with her own hands; on with her cardinal, rode to market +between her panniers, fair weather and foul, hail, blow, or snow. It +would have done your heart good to have seen her frost-bitten cheeks, as +red as a beefen from her own orchard! Ah! she was a maid of mettle; +would romp with the harvestmen, slap one upon the back, wrestle with +another, and had a rogue's trick and a joke for all round. Poor girl! +she broke her neck down stairs at a christening. To be sure I shall +never meet with her fellow! But never you mind that; I do not doubt that +I shall find more in you upon further acquaintance. As coy and bashful +as you seem, I dare say you are rogue enough at bottom. When I have +touzled and rumpled you a little, we shall see. I am no chicken, miss, +whatever you may think. I know what is what, and can see as far into a +millstone as another. Ay, ay; you will come to. The fish will snap at +the bait, never doubt it. Yes, yes, we shall rub on main well together." + +Emily by this time had in some degree mustered up her spirits, and +began, though with hesitation, to thank Mr. Grimes for his good opinion, +but to confess that she could never be brought to favour his addresses. +She therefore entreated him to desist from all further application. This +remonstrance on her part would have become more intelligible, had it not +been for his boisterous manners and extravagant cheerfulness, which +indisposed him to silence, and made him suppose that at half a word he +had sufficient intimation of another's meaning. Mr. Tyrrel, in the mean +time, was too impatient not to interrupt the scene before they could +have time to proceed far in explanation; and he was studious in the +sequel to prevent the young folks from being too intimately acquainted +with each other's inclinations. Grimes, of consequence, attributed the +reluctance of Miss Melville to maiden coyness, and the skittish shyness +of an unbroken filly. Indeed, had it been otherwise, it is not probable +that it would have made any effectual impression upon him; as he was +always accustomed to consider women as made for the recreation of the +men, and to exclaim against the weakness of people who taught them to +imagine they were to judge for themselves. + +As the suit proceeded, and Miss Melville saw more of her new admirer, +her antipathy increased. But, though her character was unspoiled by +those false wants, which frequently make people of family miserable +while they have every thing that nature requires within their reach, yet +she had been little used to opposition, and was terrified at the growing +sternness of her kinsman. Sometimes she thought of flying from a house +which was now become her dungeon; but the habits of her youth, and her +ignorance of the world, made her shrink from this project, when she +contemplated it more nearly, Mrs. Jakeman, indeed, could not think with +patience of young Grimes as a husband for her darling Emily; but her +prudence determined her to resist with all her might the idea on the +part of the young lady of proceeding to extremities. She could not +believe that Mr. Tyrrel would persist in such an unaccountable +persecution, and she exhorted Miss Melville to forget for a moment the +unaffected independence of her character, and pathetically to deprecate +her cousin's obstinacy. She had great confidence in the ingenuous +eloquence of her ward. Mrs. Jakeman did not know what was passing in the +breast of the tyrant. + +Miss Melville complied with the suggestion of her mamma. One morning +immediately after breakfast, she went to her harpsichord, and played one +after another several of those airs that were most the favourites of Mr. +Tyrrel. Mrs. Jakeman had retired; the servants were gone to their +respective employments. Mr. Tyrrel would have gone also; his mind was +untuned, and he did not take the pleasure he had been accustomed to take +in the musical performances of Emily. But her finger was now more +tasteful than common. Her mind was probably wrought up to a firmer and +bolder tone, by the recollection of the cause she was going to plead; at +the same time that it was exempt from those incapacitating tremors which +would have been felt by one that dared not look poverty in the face. Mr. +Tyrrel was unable to leave the apartment. Sometimes he traversed it with +impatient steps; then he hung over the poor innocent whose powers were +exerted to please him; at length he threw himself in a chair opposite, +with his eyes turned towards Emily. It was easy to trace the progress of +his emotions. The furrows into which his countenance was contracted were +gradually relaxed; his features were brightened into a smile; the +kindness with which he had upon former occasions contemplated Emily +seemed to revive in his heart. + +Emily watched her opportunity. As soon as she had finished one of the +pieces, she rose and went to Mr. Tyrrel. + +"Now, have not I done it nicely? and after this will not you give me a +reward?" + +"A reward! Ay, come here, and I will give you a kiss." + +"No, that is not it. And yet you have not kissed me this many a day. +Formerly you said you loved me, and called me your Emily. I am sure you +did not love me better than I loved you. You have not forgot all the +kindness you once had for me?" added she anxiously. + +"Forgot? No, no. How can you ask such a question? You shall be my dear +Emily still!" + +"Ah, those were happy times!" she replied, a little mournfully. "Do you +know, cousin, I wish I could wake, and find that the last month--only +about a month--was a dream?" + +"What do you mean by that?" said Mr. Tyrrel with an altered voice. "Have +a care! Do not put me out of humour. Do not come with your romantic +notions now." + +"No, no: I have no romantic notions in my head. I speak of something +upon which the happiness of my life depends." + +"I see what you would be at. Be silent. You know it is to no purpose to +plague me with your stubbornness. You will not let me be in good humour +with you for a moment. What my mind is determined upon about Grimes, all +the world shall not move me to give up." + +"Dear, dear cousin! why, but consider now. Grimes is a rough rustic +lout, like Orson in the story-book. He wants a wife like himself. He +would be as uneasy and as much at a loss with me, as I with him. Why +should we both of us be forced to do what neither of us is inclined to? +I cannot think what could ever have put it into your head. But now, for +goodness' sake, give it up! Marriage is a serious thing. You should not +think of joining two people for a whim, who are neither of them fit for +one another in any respect in the world. We should feel mortified and +disappointed all our lives. Month would go after month, and year after +year, and I could never hope to be my own, but by the death of a person +I ought to love. I am sure, sir, you cannot mean me all this harm. What +have I done, that I should deserve to have you for an enemy?" + +"I am not your enemy. I tell you that it is necessary to put you out of +harm's way. But, if I were your enemy, I could not be a worse torment to +you than you are to me. Are not you continually singing the praises of +Falkland? Are not you in love with Falkland? That man is a legion of +devils to me! I might as well have been a beggar! I might as well have +been a dwarf or a monster! Time was when I was thought entitled to +respect. But now, debauched by this Frenchified rascal, they call me +rude, surly, a tyrant! It is true that I cannot talk in finical phrases, +flatter people with hypocritical praise, or suppress the real feelings +of my mind. The scoundrel knows his pitiful advantages, and insults me +upon them without ceasing. He is my rival and my persecutor; and, at +last, as if all this were not enough, he has found means to spread the +pestilence in my own family. You, whom we took up out of charity, the +chance-born brat of a stolen marriage! you must turn upon your +benefactor, and wound me in the point that of all others I could least +bear. If I were your enemy, should not I have reason? Could I ever +inflict upon you such injuries as you have made me suffer? And who are +you? The lives of fifty such cannot atone for an hour of my uneasiness. +If you were to linger for twenty years upon the rack, you would never +feel what I have felt. But I am your friend. I see which way you are +going; and I am determined to save you from this thief, this +hypocritical destroyer of us all. Every moment that the mischief is left +to itself, it does but make bad worse; and I am determined to save you +out of hand." + +The angry expostulations of Mr. Tyrrel suggested new ideas to the tender +mind of Miss Melville. He had never confessed the emotions of his soul +so explicitly before; but the tempest of his thoughts suffered him to be +no longer master of himself. She saw with astonishment that he was the +irreconcilable foe of Mr. Falkland, whom she had fondly imagined it was +the same thing to know and admire; and that he harboured a deep and +rooted resentment against herself. She recoiled, without well knowing +why, before the ferocious passions of her kinsman, and was convinced +that she had nothing to hope from his implacable temper. But her alarm +was the prelude of firmness, and not of cowardice. + +"No, sir," replied she, "indeed I will not be driven any way that you +happen to like. I have been used to obey you, and, in all that is +reasonable, I will obey you still. But you urge me too far. What do you +tell me of Mr. Falkland? Have I ever done any thing to deserve your +unkind suspicions? I am innocent, and will continue innocent. Mr. Grimes +is well enough, and will no doubt find women that like him; but he is +not fit for me, and torture shall not force me to be his wife." + +Mr. Tyrrel was not a little astonished at the spirit which Emily +displayed upon this occasion. He had calculated too securely upon the +general mildness and suavity of her disposition. He now endeavoured to +qualify the harshness of his former sentiments. + +"God damn my soul! And so you can scold, can you? You expect every body +to turn out of his way, and fetch and carry, just as you please? I could +find in my heart--But you know my mind. I insist upon it that you let +Grimes court you, and that you lay aside your sulks, and give him a fair +hearing. Will you do that? If then you persist in your wilfulness, why +there, I suppose, is an end of the matter. Do not think that any body is +going to marry you, whether you will or no. You are no such mighty +prize, I assure you. If you knew your own interest, you would be glad to +take the young fellow while he is willing." + +Miss Melville rejoiced in the prospect, which the last words of her +kinsman afforded her, of a termination at no great distance to her +present persecutions. Mrs. Jakeman, to whom she communicated them, +congratulated Emily on the returning moderation and good sense of the +squire, and herself on her prudence in having urged the young lady to +this happy expostulation. But their mutual felicitations lasted not +long. Mr. Tyrrel informed Mrs. Jakeman of the necessity in which he +found himself of sending her to a distance, upon a business which would +not fail to detain her several weeks; and, though the errand by no means +wore an artificial or ambiguous face, the two friends drew a melancholy +presage from this ill-timed separation. Mrs. Jakeman, in the mean time, +exhorted her ward to persevere, reminded her of the compunction which +had already been manifested by her kinsman, and encouraged her to hope +every thing from her courage and good temper. Emily, on her part, though +grieved at the absence of her protector and counsellor at so interesting +a crisis, was unable to suspect Mr. Tyrrel of such a degree either of +malice or duplicity as could afford ground for serious alarm. She +congratulated herself upon her delivery from so alarming a persecution, +and drew a prognostic of future success from this happy termination of +the first serious affair of her life. She exchanged a state of fortitude +and alarm for her former pleasing dreams respecting Mr. Falkland. These +she bore without impatience. She was even taught by the uncertainty of +the event to desire to prolong, rather than abridge, a situation which +might be delusive, but which was not without its pleasures. + + + + +CHAPTER VIII. + + +Nothing could be further from Mr. Tyrrel's intention than to suffer his +project to be thus terminated. No sooner was he freed from the fear of +his housekeeper's interference, than he changed the whole system of his +conduct. He ordered Miss Melville to be closely confined to her +apartment, and deprived of all means of communicating her situation to +any one out of his own house. He placed over her a female servant, in +whose discretion he could confide, and who, having formerly been +honoured with the amorous notices of the squire, considered the +distinctions that were paid to Emily at Tyrrel Place as an usurpation +upon her more reasonable claims. The squire himself did every thing in +his power to blast the young lady's reputation, and represented to his +attendants these precautions as necessary, to prevent her from eloping +to his neighbour, and plunging herself in total ruin. + +As soon as Miss Melville had been twenty-four hours in durance, and +there was some reason to suppose that her spirit might be subdued to the +emergency of her situation, Mr. Tyrrel thought proper to go to her, to +explain the grounds of her present treatment, and acquaint her with the +only means by which she could hope for a change. Emily no sooner saw +him, than she turned towards him with an air of greater firmness than +perhaps she had ever assumed in her life, and accosted him thus:-- + +"Well, sir, is it you? I wanted to see you. It seems I am shut up here +by your orders. What does this mean? What right have you to make a +prisoner of me? What do I owe you? Your mother left me a hundred pounds: +have you ever offered to make any addition to my fortune? But, if you +had, I do not want it. I do not pretend to be better than the children +of other poor parents; I can maintain myself as they do. I prefer +liberty to wealth. I see you are surprised at the resolution I exert. +But ought I not to turn again, when I am trampled upon? I should have +left you before now, if Mrs. Jakeman had not over-persuaded me, and if I +had not thought better of you than by your present behaviour I find you +deserve. But now, sir, I intend to leave your house this moment, and +insist upon it, that you do not endeavour to prevent me." + +Thus saying, she rose, and went towards the door, while Mr. Tyrrel stood +thunderstruck at her magnanimity. Seeing, however, that she was upon the +point of being out of the reach of his power, he recovered himself and +pulled her back. + +"What is in the wind now? Do you think, strumpet; that you shall get +the better of me by sheer impudence? Sit down! rest you satisfied!--So +you want to know by what right you are here, do you? By the right of +possession. This house is mine, and you are in my power. There is no +Mrs. Jakeman now to spirit you away; no, nor no Falkland to bully for +you. I have countermined you, damn me! and blown up your schemes. Do you +think I will be contradicted and opposed for nothing? When did you ever +know any body resist my will without being made to repent? And shall I +now be browbeaten by a chitty-faced girl?--I have not given you a +fortune! Damn you! who brought you up? I will make you a bill for +clothing and lodging. Do not you know that every creditor has a right to +stop his runaway debtor. You may think as you please; but here you are +till you marry Grimes. Heaven and earth shall not prevent but I will get +the better of your obstinacy!" + +"Ungenerous, unmerciful man! and so it is enough for you that I have +nobody to defend me! But I am not so helpless as you may imagine. You +may imprison my body, but you cannot conquer my mind. Marry Mr. Grimes! +And is this the way to bring me to your purpose? Every hardship I suffer +puts still further distant the end for which I am thus unjustly treated. +You are not used to have your will contradicted! When did I ever +contradict it? And, in a concern that is so completely my own, shall my +will go for nothing? Would you lay down this rule for yourself, and +suffer no other creature to take the benefit of it? I want nothing of +you: how dare you refuse me the privilege of a reasonable being, to live +unmolested in poverty and innocence? What sort of a man do you show +yourself, you that lay claim to the respect and applause of every one +that knows you?" + +The spirited reproaches of Emily had at first the effect to fill Mr. +Tyrrel with astonishment, and make him feel abashed and overawed in the +presence of this unprotected innocent. But his confusion was the result +of surprise. When the first emotion wore off, he cursed himself for +being moved by her expostulations; and was ten times more exasperated +against her, for daring to defy his resentment at a time when she had +every thing to fear. His despotic and unforgiving propensities +stimulated him to a degree little short of madness. At the same time his +habits, which were pensive and gloomy, led him to meditate a variety of +schemes to punish her obstinacy. He began to suspect that there was +little hope of succeeding by open force, and therefore determined to +have recourse to treachery. + +He found in Grimes an instrument sufficiently adapted to his purpose. +This fellow, without an atom of intentional malice, was fitted, by the +mere coarseness of his perceptions, for the perpetration of the greatest +injuries. He regarded both injury and advantage merely as they related +to the gratifications of appetite; and considered it an essential in +true wisdom, to treat with insult the effeminacy of those who suffer +themselves to be tormented with ideal misfortunes. He believed that no +happier destiny could befal a young woman than to be his wife; and he +conceived that that termination would amply compensate for any +calamities she might suppose herself to undergo in the interval. He was +therefore easily prevailed upon, by certain temptations which Mr. Tyrrel +knew how to employ, to take part in the plot into which Miss Melville +was meant to be betrayed. + +Matters being thus prepared, Mr. Tyrrel proceeded, through the means of +the gaoler (for the experience he already had of personal discussion did +not incline him to repeat his visits), to play upon the fears of his +prisoner. This woman, sometimes under the pretence of friendship, and +sometimes with open malice, informed Emily, from time to time, of the +preparations that were making for her marriage. One day, "the squire had +rode over to look at a neat little farm which was destined for the +habitation of the new-married couple;" and at another, "a quantity of +live stock and household furniture was procured, that every thing might +be ready for their reception." She then told her "of a licence that was +bought, a parson in readiness, and a day fixed for the nuptials." When +Emily endeavoured, though with increased misgivings, to ridicule these +proceedings as absolutely nugatory without her consent, her artful +gouvernante related several stories of forced marriages, and assured her +that neither protestations, nor silence, nor fainting, would be of any +avail, either to suspend the ceremony, or to set it aside when +performed. + +The situation of Miss Melville was in an eminent degree pitiable. She +had no intercourse but with her persecutors. She had not a human being +with whom to consult, who might afford her the smallest degree of +consolation and encouragement. She had fortitude; but it was neither +confirmed nor directed by the dictates of experience. It could not +therefore be expected to be so inflexible, as with better information it +would, no doubt, have been found. She had a clear and noble spirit; but +she had some of her sex's errors. Her mind sunk under the uniform +terrors with which she was assailed, and her health became visibly +impaired. + +Her firmness being thus far undermined, Grimes, in pursuance of his +instructions, took care, in his next interview, to throw out an +insinuation that, for his own part, he had never cared for the match, +and since she was so averse to it, would be better pleased that it +should never take place. Between one and the other however, he was got +into a scrape, and now he supposed he must marry, will he, nill he. The +two squires would infallibly ruin him upon the least appearance of +backwardness on his part, as they were accustomed to do every inferior +that resisted their will. Emily was rejoiced to find her admirer in so +favourable a disposition; and earnestly pressed him to give effect to +this humane declaration. Her representations were full of eloquence and +energy. Grimes appeared to be moved at the fervency of her manner; but +objected the resentment of Mr. Tyrrel and his landlord. At length, +however, he suggested a project, in consequence of which he might assist +her in her escape, without its ever coming to their knowledge, as, +indeed, there was no likelihood that their suspicions would fix upon +him. "To be sure," said he, "you have refused me in a disdainful sort of +a way, as a man may say. Mayhap you thought I was no better 'an a brute: +but I bear you no malice, and I will show you that I am more +kind-hearted 'an you have been willing to think. It is a strange sort of +a vagary you have taken, to stand in your own light, and disoblige all +your friends. But if you are resolute, do you see? I scorn to be the +husband of a lass that is not every bit as willing as I; and so I will +even help to put you in a condition to follow your own inclinations." + +Emily listened to these suggestions at first with eagerness and +approbation. But her fervency somewhat abated, when they came to discuss +the minute parts of the undertaking. It was necessary, as Grimes +informed her, that her escape should be effected in the dead of the +night. He would conceal himself for that purpose in the garden, and be +provided with false keys, by which to deliver her from her prison. These +circumstances were by no means adapted to calm her perturbed +imagination. To throw herself into the arms of the man whose intercourse +she was employing every method to avoid, and whom, under the idea of a +partner for life, she could least of all men endure, was, no doubt, an +extraordinary proceeding. The attendant circumstances of darkness and +solitude aggravated the picture. The situation of Tyrrel Place was +uncommonly lonely; it was three miles from the nearest village, and not +less than seven from that in which Mrs. Jakeman's sister resided, under +whose protection Miss Melville was desirous of placing herself. The +ingenuous character of Emily did not allow her once to suspect Grimes of +intending to make an ungenerous and brutal advantage of these +circumstances; but her mind involuntarily revolted against the idea of +committing herself, alone, to the disposal of a man, whom she had lately +been accustomed to consider as the instrument of her treacherous +relation. + +After having for some time revolved these considerations, she thought of +the expedient of desiring Grimes to engage Mrs. Jakeman's sister to wait +for her at the outside of the garden. But this Grimes peremptorily +refused. He even flew into a passion at the proposal. It showed very +little gratitude, to desire him to disclose to other people his concern +in this dangerous affair. For his part, he was determined, in +consideration of his own safety, never to appear in it to any living +soul. If Miss did not believe him, when he made this proposal out of +pure good-nature, and would not trust him a single inch, she might even +see to the consequences herself. He was resolved to condescend no +further to the whims of a person who, in her treatment of him, had +shown herself as proud as Lucifer himself. + +Emily exerted herself to appease his resentment; but all the eloquence +of her new confederate could not prevail upon her instantly to give up +her objection. She desired till the next day to consider of it. The day +after was fixed by Mr. Tyrrel for the marriage ceremony. In the mean +time she was pestered with intimations, in a thousand forms, of the fate +that so nearly awaited her. The preparations were so continued, +methodical, and regular, as to produce in her the most painful and +aching anxiety. If her heart attained a moment's intermission upon the +subject, her female attendant was sure, by some sly hint or sarcastical +remark, to put a speedy termination to her tranquillity. She felt +herself, as she afterwards remarked, alone, uninstructed, just broken +loose, as it were, from the trammels of infancy, without one single +creature to concern himself in her fate. She, who till then never knew +an enemy, had now, for three weeks, not seen the glimpse of a human +countenance, that she had not good reason to consider as wholly +estranged to her at least, if not unrelentingly bent on her destruction. +She now, for the first time, experienced the anguish of never having +known her parents, and being cast upon the charity of people with whom +she had too little equality, to hope to receive from them the offices of +friendship. + +The succeeding night was filled with the most anxious thoughts. When a +momentary oblivion stole upon her senses, her distempered imagination +conjured up a thousand images of violence and falsehood; she saw herself +in the hands of her determined enemies, who did not hesitate by the most +daring treachery to complete her ruin. Her waking thoughts were not more +consoling. The struggle was too great for her constitution. As morning +approached, she resolved, at all hazards, to put herself into the hands +of Grimes. This determination was no sooner made, than she felt her +heart sensibly lightened. She could not conceive any evil which could +result from this proceeding, that deserved to be put in the balance +against those which, under the roof of her kinsman, appeared +unavoidable. + +When she communicated her determination to Grimes, it was not possible +to say whether he received pleasure or pain from the intimation. He +smiled indeed; but his smile was accompanied by a certain abrupt +ruggedness of countenance, so that it might equally well be the smile of +sarcasm or of congratulation. He, however, renewed his assurances of +fidelity to his engagements and punctuality of execution. Meanwhile the +day was interspersed with nuptial presents and preparations, all +indicating the firmness as well as security of the directors of the +scene. Emily had hoped that, as the crisis approached, they might have +remitted something of their usual diligence. She was resolved, in that +case, if a fair opportunity had offered, to give the slip both to her +jailors, and to her new and reluctantly chosen confederate. But, though +extremely vigilant for that purpose, she found the execution of the idea +impracticable. + +At length the night, so critical to her happiness, approached. The mind +of Emily could not fail, on this occasion, to be extremely agitated. She +had first exerted all her perspicacity to elude the vigilance of her +attendant. This insolent and unfeeling tyrant, instead of any +relentings, had only sought to make sport of her anxiety. Accordingly, +in one instance she hid herself, and, suffering Emily to suppose that +the coast was clear, met her at the end of the gallery, near the top of +the staircase. "How do you do, my dear?" said she, with an insulting +tone. "And so the little dear thought itself cunning enough to outwit +me, did it? Oh, it was a sly little gipsy! Go, go back, love; troop!" +Emily felt deeply the trick that was played upon her. She sighed, but +disdained to return any answer to this low vulgarity. Being once more in +her chamber, she sat down in a chair, and remained buried in reverie for +more than two hours. After this she went to her drawers, and turned +over, in a hurrying confused way, her linen and clothes, having in her +mind the provision it would be necessary to make for her elopement. Her +jailor officiously followed her from place to place, and observed what +she did for the present in silence. It was now the hour of rest. "Good +night, child," said this saucy girl, in the act of retiring. "It is time +to lock up. For the few next hours, the time is your own. Make the best +use of it! Do'ee think ee can creep out at the key-hole, lovey? At eight +o'clock you see me again. And then, and then," added she, clapping her +hands, "it is all over. The sun is not surer to rise, than you and your +honest man to be made one." + +There was something in the tone with which this slut uttered her +farewell, that suggested the question to Emily, "What does she mean? Is +it possible that she should know what has been planned for the few next +hours?"--This was the first moment that suspicion had offered itself, +and its continuance was short. With an aching heart she folded up the +few necessaries she intended to take with her. She instinctively +listened, with an anxiety that would almost have enabled her to hear the +stirring of a leaf. From time to time she thought her ear was struck +with the sound of feet; but the treading, if treading it were, was so +soft, that she could never ascertain whether it were a real sound, or +the mere creature of the fancy. Then all was still, as if the universal +motion had been at rest. By and by she conceived she overheard a noise +as of buzzing and low-muttered speech. Her heart palpitated; for a +second time she began to doubt the honesty of Grimes. The suggestion was +now more anxious than before; but it was too late. Presently she heard +the sound of a key in her chamber-door, and the rustic made his +appearance. She started, and cried, "Are we discovered? did not I hear +you speak?" Grimes advanced on tiptoe with his finger to his lip. "No, +no," replied he, "all is safe!" He took her by the hand, led her in +silence out of the house, and then across the garden. Emily examined +with her eye the doors and passages as they proceeded, and looked on all +sides with fearful suspicion; but every thing was as vacant and still as +she herself could have wished. Grimes opened a back-door of the garden +already unlocked, that led into an unfrequented lane. There stood two +horses ready equipped for the journey, and fastened by their bridles to +a post not six yards distant from the garden. Grimes pushed the door +after them. + +"By Gemini," said he, "my heart was in my mouth. As I comed along to +you, I saw Mun, coachey, pop along from the back-door to the stables. He +was within a hop, step, and jump of me. But he had a lanthorn in his +hand, and he did not see me, being as I was darkling." Saying this, he +assisted Miss Melville to mount. He troubled her little during the +route; on the contrary, he was remarkably silent and contemplative, a +circumstance by no means disagreeable to Emily, to whom his conversation +had never been acceptable. + +After having proceeded about two miles, they turned into a wood, through +which the road led to the place of their destination. The night was +extremely dark, at the same time that the air was soft and mild, it +being now the middle of summer. Under pretence of exploring the way, +Grimes contrived, when they had already penetrated into the midst of +this gloomy solitude, to get his horse abreast with that of Miss +Melville, and then, suddenly reaching out his hand, seized hold of her +bridle. "I think we may as well stop here a bit," said he. + +"Stop!" exclaimed Emily with surprise; "why should we stop? Mr. Grimes, +what do you mean?" + +"Come, come," said he, "never trouble yourself to wonder. Did you think +I were such a goose, to take all this trouble merely to gratify your +whim? I' faith, nobody shall find me a pack-horse, to go of other folks' +errands, without knowing a reason why. I cannot say that I much minded +to have you at first; but your ways are enough to stir the blood of my +grand-dad. Far-fetched and dear-bought is always relishing. Your consent +was so hard to gain, that squire thought it was surest asking in the +dark. A' said however, a' would have no such doings in his house, and +so, do ye see, we are comed here." + +"For God's sake, Mr. Grimes, think what you are about! You cannot be +base enough to ruin a poor creature who has put herself under your +protection! + +"Ruin! No, no, I will make an honest woman of you, when all is done. +Nay, none of your airs; no tricks upon travellers! I have you here as +safe AS a horse in a pound; there is not a house nor a shed within a +mile of us; and, if I miss the opportunity, call me spade. Faith, you +are a delicate morsel, and there is no time to be lost!" + +Miss Melville had but an instant in which to collect her thoughts. She +felt that there was little hope of softening the obstinate and +insensible brute in whose power she was placed. But the presence of mind +and intrepidity annexed to her character did not now desert her. Grimes +had scarcely finished his harangue, when, with a strong and unexpected +jerk, she disengaged the bridle from his grasp, and at the same time put +her horse upon full speed. She had scarcely advanced twice the length of +her horse, when Grimes recovered from his surprise, and pursued her, +inexpressibly mortified at being so easily overreached. The sound of his +horse behind served but to rouse more completely the mettle of that of +Emily; whether by accident or sagacity, the animal pursued without a +fault the narrow and winding way; and the chase continued the whole +length of the wood. + +At the extremity of this wood there was a gate. The recollection of this +softened a little the cutting disappointment of Grimes, as he thought +himself secure of putting an end, by its assistance, to the career of +Emily; nor was it very probable that any body would appear to interrupt +his designs, in such a place, and in the dead and silence of the night. +By the most extraordinary accident, however, they found a man on +horseback in wait at this gate. "Help, help!" exclaimed the affrighted +Emily; "thieves! murder! help!" The man was Mr. Falkland. Grimes knew +his voice; and therefore, though he attempted a sort of sullen +resistance, it was feebly made. Two other men, whom, by reason of the +darkness, he had not at first seen, and who were Mr. Falkland's +servants, hearing the bustle of the rencounter, and alarmed for the +safety of their master, rode up; and then Grimes, disappointed at the +loss of his gratification, and admonished by conscious guilt, shrunk +from farther parley, and rode off in silence. + +It may seem strange that Mr. Falkland should thus a second time have +been the saviour of Miss Melville, and that under circumstances the most +unexpected and singular. But in this instance it is easily to be +accounted for. He had heard of a man who lurked about this wood for +robbery or some other bad design, and that it was conjectured this man +was Hawkins, another of the victims of Mr. Tyrrel's rural tyranny, whom +I shall immediately have occasion to introduce. Mr. Falkland's +compassion had already been strongly excited in favour of Hawkins; he +had in vain endeavoured to find him, and do him good; and he easily +conceived that, if the conjecture which had been made in this instance +proved true, he might have it in his power not only to do what he had +always intended, but further, to save from a perilous offence against +the laws and society a man who appeared to have strongly imbibed the +principles of justice and virtue. He took with him two servants, +because, going with the express design of encountering robbers, if +robbers should be found, he believed he should be inexcusable if he did +not go provided against possible accidents. But he had directed them, at +the same time that they kept within call, to be out of the reach of +being seen; and it was only the eagerness of their zeal that had brought +them up thus early in the present encounter. + +This new adventure promised something extraordinary. Mr. Falkland did +not immediately recognise Miss Melville; and the person of Grimes was +that of a total stranger, whom he did not recollect to have ever seen. +But it was easy to understand the merits of the case, and the propriety +of interfering. The resolute manner of Mr. Falkland, conjoined with the +dread which Grimes, oppressed with a sense of wrong, entertained of the +opposition of so elevated a personage, speedily put the ravisher to +flight. Emily was left alone with her deliverer. He found her much more +collected and calm, than could reasonably have been expected from a +person who had been, a moment before, in the most alarming situation. +She told him of the place to which she desired to be conveyed, and he +immediately undertook to escort her. As they went along, she recovered +that state of mind which inclined her to make a person to whom she had +such repeated obligations, and who was so eminently the object of her +admiration, acquainted with the events that had recently befallen her. +Mr. Falkland listened with eagerness and surprise. Though he had already +known various instances of Mr. Tyrrel's mean jealousy and unfeeling +tyranny, this surpassed them all; and he could scarcely credit his ears +while he heard the tale. His brutal neighbour seemed to realise all that +has been told of the passions of fiends. Miss Melville was obliged to +repeat, in the course of her tale, her kinsman's rude accusation against +her, of entertaining a passion for Mr. Falkland; and this she did with +the most bewitching simplicity and charming confusion. Though this part +of the tale was a source of real pain to her deliverer, yet it is not to +be supposed but that the flattering partiality of this unhappy girl +increased the interest he felt in her welfare, and the indignation he +conceived against her infernal kinsman. + +They arrived without accident at the house of the good lady under whose +protection Emily desired to place herself. Here Mr. Falkland willingly +left her as in a place of security. Such conspiracies as that of which +she was intended to have been the victim, depend for their success upon +the person against whom they are formed being out of the reach of help; +and the moment they are detected, they are annihilated. Such reasoning +will, no doubt, be generally found sufficiently solid; and it appeared +to Mr. Falkland perfectly applicable to the present case. But he was +mistaken. + + + + +CHAPTER IX. + + +Mr. Falkland had experienced the nullity of all expostulation with Mr. +Tyrrel, and was therefore content in the present case with confining his +attention to the intended victim. The indignation with which he thought +of his neighbour's character was now grown to such a height, as to fill +him with reluctance to the idea of a voluntary interview. There was +indeed another affair which had been contemporary with this, that had +once more brought these mortal enemies into a state of contest, and had +contributed to raise into a temper little short of madness, the already +inflamed and corrosive bitterness of Mr. Tyrrel. + +There was a tenant of Mr. Tyrrel, one Hawkins;--I cannot mention his +name without recollecting the painful tragedies that are annexed to it! +This Hawkins had originally been taken up by Mr. Tyrrel, with a view of +protecting him from the arbitrary proceedings of a neighbouring squire, +though he had now in his turn become an object of persecution to Mr. +Tyrrel himself. The first ground of their connection was this:--Hawkins, +beside a farm which he rented under the above-mentioned squire, had a +small freehold estate that he inherited from his father. This of course +entitled him to a vote in the county elections; and, a warmly contested +election having occurred, he was required by his landlord to vote for +the candidate in whose favour he had himself engaged. Hawkins refused +to obey the mandate, and soon after received notice to quit the farm he +at that time rented. + +It happened that Mr. Tyrrel had interested himself strongly in behalf of +the opposite candidate; and, as Mr. Tyrrel's estate bordered upon the +seat of Hawkins's present residence, the ejected countryman could think +of no better expedient than that of riding over to this gentleman's +mansion, and relating the case to him. Mr. Tyrrel heard him through with +attention. "Well, friend," said he, "it is very true that I wished Mr. +Jackman to carry his election; but you know it is usual in these cases +for tenants to vote just as their landlords please. I do not think +proper to encourage rebellion."--"All that is very right, and please +you," replied Hawkins, "and I would have voted at my landlord's bidding +for any other man in the kingdom but Squire Marlow. You must know one +day his huntsman rode over my fence, and so through my best field of +standing corn. It was not above a dozen yards about if he had kept the +cart-road. The fellow had served me the same sauce, an it please your +honour, three or four times before. So I only asked him what he did that +for, and whether he had not more conscience than to spoil people's crops +o' that fashion? Presently the squire came up. He is but a poor, +weazen-face chicken of a gentleman, saving your honour's reverence. And +so he flew into a woundy passion, and threatened to horsewhip me. I will +do as much in reason to pleasure my landlord as arr a tenant he has; but +I will not give my vote to a man that threatens to horsewhip me. And so, +your honour, I and my wife and three children are to be turned out of +house and home, and what I am to do to maintain them God knows. I have +been a hard-working man, and have always lived well, and I do think the +case is main hard. Squire Underwood turns me out of my farm; and if your +honour do not take me in, I know none of the neighbouring gentry will, +for fear, as they say, of encouraging their own tenants to run rusty +too." + +This representation was not without its effect upon Mr. Tyrrel. "Well, +well, man," replied he, "we will see what can be done. Order and +subordination are very good things; but people should know how much to +require. As you tell the story, I cannot see that you are greatly to +blame. Marlow is a coxcombical prig, that is the truth on't; and if a +man will expose himself, why, he must even take what follows. I do hate +a Frenchified fop with all my soul: and I cannot say that I am much +pleased with my neighbour Underwood for taking the part of such a +rascal. Hawkins, I think, is your name? You may call on Barnes, my +steward, to-morrow, and he shall speak to you." + +While Mr. Tyrrel was speaking, he recollected that he had a farm vacant, +of nearly the same value as that which Hawkins at present rented under +Mr. Underwood. He immediately consulted his steward, and, finding the +thing suitable in every respect, Hawkins was installed out of hand in +the catalogue of Mr. Tyrrel's tenants. Mr. Underwood extremely resented +this proceeding, which indeed, as being contrary to the understood +conventions of the country gentlemen, few people but Mr. Tyrrel would +have ventured upon. There was an end, said Mr. Underwood, to all +regulation, if tenants were to be encouraged in such disobedience. It +was not a question of this or that candidate, seeing that any gentleman, +who was a true friend to his country, would rather lose his election +than do a thing which, if once established into a practice, would +deprive them for ever of the power of managing any election. The +labouring people were sturdy and resolute enough of their own accord; it +became every day more difficult to keep them under any subordination; +and, if the gentlemen were so ill advised as to neglect the public good, +and encourage them in their insolence, there was no foreseeing where it +would end. + +Mr. Tyrrel was not of a stamp to be influenced by these remonstrances. +Their general spirit was sufficiently conformable to the sentiments he +himself entertained; but he was of too vehement a temper to maintain the +character of a consistent politician; and, however wrong his conduct +might be, he would by no means admit of its being set right by the +suggestions of others. The more his patronage of Hawkins was criticised, +the more inflexibly he adhered to it; and he was at no loss in clubs and +other assemblies to overbear and silence, if not to confute, his +censurers. Beside which, Hawkins had certain accomplishments which +qualified him to be a favourite with Mr. Tyrrel. The bluntness of his +manner and the ruggedness of his temper gave him some resemblance to his +landord; and, as these qualities were likely to be more frequently +exercised on such persons as had incurred Mr. Tyrrel's displeasure, than +upon Mr. Tyrrel himself, they were not observed without some degree of +complacency. In a word, he every day received new marks of distinction +from his patron, and after some time was appointed coadjutor to Mr. +Barnes under the denomination of bailiff. It was about the same period +that he obtained a lease of the farm of which he was tenant. + +Mr. Tyrrel determined, as occasion offered, to promote every part of the +family of this favoured dependent. Hawkins had a son, a lad of +seventeen, of an agreeable person, a ruddy complexion, and of quick and +lively parts. This lad was in an uncommon degree the favourite of his +father, who seemed to have nothing so much at heart as the future +welfare of his son. Mr. Tyrrel had noticed him two or three times with +approbation; and the boy, being fond of the sports of the field, had +occasionally followed the hounds, and displayed various instances, both +of agility and sagacity, in presence of the squire. One day in +particular he exhibited himself with uncommon advantage; and Mr. Tyrrel +without further delay proposed to his father, to take him into his +family, and make him whipper-in to his hounds, till he could provide him +with some more lucrative appointment in his service. + +This proposal was received by Hawkins with various marks of +mortification. He excused himself with hesitation for not accepting the +offered favour; said the lad was in many ways useful to him; and hoped +his honour would not insist upon depriving him of his assistance. This +apology might perhaps have been sufficient with any other man than Mr. +Tyrrel; but it was frequently observed of this gentleman that, when he +had once formed a determination, however slight, in favour of any +measure, he was never afterwards known to give it up, and that the only +effect of opposition was to make him eager and inflexible, in pursuit of +that to which he had before been nearly indifferent. At first he seemed +to receive the apology of Hawkins with good humour, and to see nothing +in it but what was reasonable; but afterwards, every time he saw the +boy, his desire of retaining him in his service was increased, and he +more than once repeated to his father the good disposition in which he +felt himself towards him. At length he observed that the lad was no more +to be seen mingling in his favourite sports, and he began to suspect +that this originated in a determination to thwart him in his projects. + +Roused by this suspicion, which, to a man of Mr. Tyrrel's character, +was not of a nature to brook delay, he sent for Hawkins to confer with +him. "Hawkins," said he, in a tone of displeasure, "I am not satisfied +with you. I have spoken to you two or three times about this lad of +yours, whom I am desirous of taking into favour. What is the reason, +sir, that you seem unthankful and averse to my kindness? You ought to +know that I am not to be trifled with. I shall not be contented, when I +offer my favours, to have them rejected by such fellows as you. I made +you what you are; and, if I please, can make you more helpless and +miserable than you were when I found you. Have a care!" + +"An it please your honour," said Hawkins, "you have been a very good +master to me, and I will tell you the whole truth. I hope you will na be +angry. This lad is my favourite, my comfort, and the stay of my age." + +"Well, and what then? Is that a reason you should hinder his +preferment?" + +"Nay, pray your honour, hear me. I may be very weak for aught I know in +this case, but I cannot help it. My father was a clergyman. We have all +of us lived in a creditable way; and I cannot bear to think that this +poor lad of mine should go to service. For my part, I do not see any +good that comes by servants. I do not know, your honour, but, I think, I +should not like my Leonard to be such as they. God forgive me, if I +wrong them! But this is a very dear case, and I cannot bear to risk my +poor boy's welfare, when I can so easily, if you please, keep him out or +harm's way. At present he is sober and industrious, and, without being +pert or surly, knows what is due to him. I know, your honour, that it is +main foolish of me to talk to you thus; but your honour has been a good +master to me, and I cannot bear to tell you a lie." + +Mr. Tyrrel had heard the whole of this harangue in silence, because he +was too much astonished to open his mouth. If a thunderbolt had fallen +at his feet, he could not have testified greater surprise. He had +thought that Hawkins was so foolishly fond of his son, that he could not +bear to trust him out of his presence; but had never in the slightest +degree suspected what he now found to be the truth. + +"Oh, ho, you are a gentleman, are you? A pretty gentleman truly! your +father was a clergyman! Your family is too good to enter into my +service! Why you impudent rascal! was it for this that I took you up, +when Mr. Underwood dismissed you for your insolence to him? Have I been +nursing a viper in my bosom? Pretty master's manners will be +contaminated truly? He will not know what is due to him, but will be +accustomed to obey orders! You insufferable villain! Get out of my +sight! Depend upon it, I will have no gentlemen on my estate! I will off +with them, root and branch, bag and baggage! So do you hear, sir? come +to me to-morrow morning, bring your son, and ask my pardon; or, take my +word for it, I will make you so miserable, you shall wish you had never +been born." + +This treatment was too much for Hawkins's patience. "There is no need, +your honour, that I should come to you again about this affair. I have +taken up my determination, and no time can make any change in it. I am +main sorry to displease your worship, and I know that you can do me a +great deal of mischief. But I hope you will not be so hardhearted as to +ruin a father only for being fond of his child, even if so be that his +fondness should make him do a foolish thing. But I cannot help it, your +honour: you must do as you please. The poorest neger, as a man may say, +has some point that he will not part with. I will lose all that I have, +and go to day-labour, and my son too, if needs must; but I will not make +a gentleman's servant of him." + +"Very well, friend; very well!" replied Mr. Tyrrel, foaming with rage. +"Depend upon it, I will remember you! Your pride shall have a downfal! +God damn it! is it come to this? Shall a rascal that farms his forty +acres, pretend to beard the lord of the manor? I will tread you into +paste! Let me advise you, scoundrel, to shut up your house and fly, as +if the devil was behind you! You may think yourself happy, if I be not +too quick for you yet, if you escape in a whole skin! I would not suffer +such a villain to remain upon my land a day longer, if I could gain the +Indies by it!" + +"Not so fast, your honour," answered Hawkins, sturdily. "I hope you will +think better of it, and see that I have not been to blame. But if you +should not, there is some harm that you can do me, and some harm that +you cannot. Though I am a plain, working man, your honour, do you see? +yet I am a man still. No; I have got a lease of my farm, and I shall not +quit it o' thaten. I hope there is some law for poor folk, as well as for +rich." + +Mr. Tyrrel, unused to contradiction, was provoked beyond bearing at the +courage and independent spirit of his retainer. There was not a tenant +upon his estate, or at least not one of Hawkins's mediocrity of fortune, +whom the general policy of landowners, and still more the arbitrary and +uncontrollable temper of Mr. Tyrrel, did not effectually restrain from +acts of open defiance. + +"Excellent, upon my soul! God damn my blood! but you are a rare fellow. +You have a lease, have you? You will not quit, not you! a pretty pass +things are come to, if a lease can protect such fellows as you against +the lord of a manor! But you are for a trial of skill? Oh, very well, +friend, very well! With all my soul! Since it is come to that, we will +show you some pretty sport before we have done! But get out of my sight, +you rascal! I have not another word to say to you! Never darken my doors +again." + +Hawkins (to borrow the language of the world) was guilty in this affair +of a double imprudence. He talked to his landlord in a more peremptory +manner than the constitution and practices of this country allow a +dependent to assume. But above all, having been thus hurried away by his +resentment, he ought to have foreseen the consequences. It was mere +madness in him to think of contesting with a man of Mr. Tyrrel's +eminence and fortune. It was a fawn contending with a lion. Nothing +could have been more easy to predict, than that it was of no avail for +him to have right on his side, when his adversary had influence and +wealth, and therefore could so victoriously justify any extravagancies +that he might think proper to commit. This maxim was completely +illustrated in the sequel. Wealth and despotism easily know how to +engage those laws as the coadjutors of their oppression, which were +perhaps at first intended [witless and miserable precaution!] for the +safeguards of the poor. + +From this moment Mr. Tyrrel was bent upon Hawkins's destruction; and he +left no means unemployed that could either harass or injure the object +of his persecution. He deprived him of his appointment of bailiff, and +directed Barnes and his other dependents to do him ill offices upon all +occasions. Mr. Tyrrel, by the tenure of his manor, was impropriator of +the great tithes, and this circumstance afforded him frequent +opportunities of petty altercation. The land of one part of Hawkins's +farm, though covered with corn, was lower than the rest; and +consequently exposed to occasional inundations from a river by which it +was bounded. Mr. Tyrrel had a dam belonging to this river privately cut, +about a fortnight before the season of harvest, and laid the whole under +water. He ordered his servants to pull away the fences of the higher +ground during the night, and to turn in his cattle, to the utter +destruction of the crop. These expedients, however, applied to only one +part of the property of this unfortunate man. But Mr. Tyrrel did not +stop here. A sudden mortality took place among Hawkins's live stock, +attended with very suspicious circumstances. Hawkins's vigilance was +strongly excited by this event, and he at length succeeded in tracing +the matter so accurately, that he conceived he could bring it home to +Mr. Tyrrel himself. + +Hawkins had hitherto carefully avoided, notwithstanding the injuries he +had suffered, the attempting to right himself by legal process; being of +opinion that law was better adapted for a weapon of tyranny in the hands +of the rich, than for a shield to protect the humbler part of the +community against their usurpations. In this last instance however he +conceived that the offence was so atrocious, as to make it impossible +that any rank could protect the culprit against the severity of justice. +In the sequel, he saw reason to applaud himself for his former +inactivity in this respect, and to repent that any motive had been +strong enough to persuade him into a contrary system. + +This was the very point to which Mr. Tyrrel wanted to bring him, and he +could scarcely credit his good fortune, when he was told that Hawkins +had entered an action. His congratulation upon this occasion was +immoderate, as he now conceived that the ruin of his late favourite was +irretrievable. He consulted his attorney, and urged him by every motive +he could devise, to employ the whole series of his subterfuges in the +present affair. The direct repelling of the charge exhibited against him +was the least part of his care; the business was, by affidavits, +motions, pleas, demurrers, flaws, and appeals, to protract the question +from term to term, and from court to court. It would, as Mr. Tyrrel +argued, be the disgrace of a civilized country, if a gentleman, when +insolently attacked in law by the scum of the earth, could not convert +the cause into a question of the longest purse, and stick in the skirts +of his adversary till he had reduced him to beggary. + +Mr. Tyrrel, however, was by no means so far engrossed by his law-suit, +as to neglect other methods of proceeding offensively against his +tenant. Among the various expedients that suggested themselves, there +was one, which, though it tended rather to torment than irreparably +injure the sufferer, was not rejected. This was derived from the +particular situation of Hawkins's house, barns, stacks, and outhouses. +They were placed at the extremity of a slip of land connecting them with +the rest of the farm, and were surrounded on three sides by fields, in +the occupation of one of Mr. Tyrrel's tenants most devoted to the +pleasures of his landlord. The road to the market-town ran at the bottom +of the largest of these fields, and was directly in view of the front of +the house. No inconvenience had yet arisen from that circumstance, as +there had always been a broad path, that intersected this field, and led +directly from Hawkins's house to the road. This path, or private road, +was now, by concert of Mr. Tyrrel and his obliging tenant, shut up, so +as to make Hawkins a sort of prisoner in his own domains, and oblige him +to go near a mile about for the purposes of his traffic. + +Young Hawkins, the lad who had been the original subject of dispute +between his father and the squire, had much of his father's spirit, and +felt an uncontrollable indignation against the successive acts of +despotism of which he was a witness. His resentment was the greater, +because the sufferings to which his parent was exposed, all of them +flowed from affection to him, at the same time that he could not propose +removing the ground of dispute, as by so doing he would seem to fly in +the face of his father's paternal kindness. Upon the present occasion, +without asking any counsel but of his own impatient resentment, he went +in the middle of the night, and removed all the obstructions that had +been placed in the way of the old path, broke the padlocks that had been +fixed, and threw open the gates. + +In these operations he did not proceed unobserved, and the next day a +warrant was issued for apprehending him. He was accordingly carried +before a meeting of justices, and by them committed to the county gaol, +to take his trial for the felony at the next assizes. Mr. Tyrrel was +determined to prosecute the offence with the greatest severity; and his +attorney, having made the proper enquiries for that purpose, undertook +to bring it under that clause of the act 9 Geo. I. commonly called the +Black Act, which declares that "any person, armed with a sword, or other +offensive weapon, and having his face blackened, or being otherwise +disguised, appearing in any warren or place where hares or conies have +been or shall be usually kept, and being thereof duly convicted, shall +be adjudged guilty of felony, and shall suffer death, as in cases of +felony, without benefit of clergy." Young Hawkins, it seemed, had +buttoned the cape of his great coat over his face, as soon as he +perceived himself to be observed, and he was furnished with a +wrenching-iron for the purpose of breaking the padlocks. The attorney +further undertook to prove, by sufficient witnesses, that the field in +question was a warren in which hares were regularly fed. Mr. Tyrrel +seized upon these pretences with inexpressible satisfaction. He +prevailed upon the justices, by the picture he drew of the obstinacy and +insolence of the Hawkinses, fully to commit the lad upon this miserable +charge; and it was by no means so certain as paternal affection would +have desired, that the same overpowering influence would not cause in +the sequel the penal clause to be executed in all its strictness. + +This was the finishing stroke to Hawkins's miseries: as he was not +deficient in courage, he had stood up against his other persecutions +without flinching. He was not unaware of the advantages which our laws +and customs give to the rich over the poor, in contentions of this kind. +But, being once involved, there was a stubbornness in his nature that +would not allow him to retract, and he suffered himself to hope, rather +than expect, a favourable issue. But in this last event he was wounded +in the point that was nearest his heart. He had feared to have his son +contaminated and debased by a servile station, and he now saw him +transferred to the seminary of a gaol. He was even uncertain as to the +issue of his imprisonment, and trembled to think what the tyranny of +wealth might effect to blast his hopes for ever. + +From this moment his heart died within him. He had trusted to +persevering industry and skill, to save the wreck of his little property +from the vulgar spite of his landlord. But he had now no longer any +spirit to exert those efforts which his situation more than ever +required. Mr. Tyrrel proceeded without remission in his machinations; +Hawkins's affairs every day grew more desperate, and the squire, +watching the occasion, took the earliest opportunity of seizing upon +his remaining property in the mode of a distress for rent. + +It was precisely in this stage of the affair, that Mr. Falkland and Mr. +Tyrrel accidentally met, in a private road near the habitation of the +latter. They were on horseback, and Mr. Falkland was going to the house +of the unfortunate tenant, who seemed upon the point of perishing under +his landlord's malice. He had been just made acquainted with the tale of +this persecution. It had indeed been an additional aggravation of +Hawkins's calamity, that Mr. Falkland, whose interference might +otherwise have saved him, had been absent from the neighbourhood for a +considerable time. He had been three months in London, and from thence +had gone to visit his estates in another part of the island. The proud +and self-confident spirit of this poor fellow always disposed him to +depend, as long as possible, upon his own exertions. He had avoided +applying to Mr. Falkland, or indeed indulging himself in any manner in +communicating and bewailing his hard hap, in the beginning of the +contention, and, when the extremity grew more urgent, and he would have +been willing to recede in some degree from the stubbornness of his +measures, he found it no longer in his power. After an absence of +considerable duration, Mr. Falkland at length returned somewhat +unexpectedly; and having learned, among the first articles of country +intelligence, the distresses of this unfortunate yeoman, he resolved to +ride over to his house the next morning, and surprise him with all the +relief it was in his power to bestow. + +At sight of Mr. Tyrrel in this unexpected rencounter, his face reddened +with indignation. His first feeling, as he afterwards said, was to avoid +him; but finding that he must pass him, he conceived that it would be +want of spirit not to acquaint him with his feelings on the present +occasion. + +"Mr. Tyrrel," said he, somewhat abruptly, "I am sorry for a piece of +news which I have just heard." + +"And pray, sir, what is your sorrow to me?" + +"A great deal, sir: it is caused by the distresses of a poor tenant of +yours, Hawkins. If your steward have proceeded without your authority, I +think it right to inform you what he has done; and, if he have had your +authority, I would gladly persuade you to think better of it." + +"Mr. Falkland, it would be quite as well if you would mind your own +business, and leave me to mind mine. I want no monitor, and I will have +none." + +"You mistake, Mr. Tyrrel; I am minding my own business. If I see you +fall into a pit, it is my business to draw you out and save your life. +If I see you pursuing a wrong mode of conduct, it is my business to set +you right and save your honour." + +"Zounds, sir, do not think to put your conundrums upon me! Is not the +man my tenant? Is not my estate my own? What signifies calling it mine, +if I am not to have the direction of it? Sir, I pay for what I have: I +owe no man a penny; and I will not put my estate to nurse to you, nor +the best he that wears a head." + +"It is very true," said Mr. Falkland, avoiding any direct notice of the +last words of Mr. Tyrrel, "that there is a distinction of ranks. I +believe that distinction is a good thing, and necessary to the peace of +mankind. But, however necessary it may be, we must acknowledge that it +puts some hardship upon the lower orders of society. It makes one's +heart ache to think, that one man is born to the inheritance of every +superfluity, while the whole share of another, without any demerit of +his, is drudgery and starving; and that all this is indispensable. We +that are rich, Mr. Tyrrel, must do every thing in our power to lighten +the yoke of these unfortunate people. We must not use the advantage that +accident has given us with an unmerciful hand. Poor wretches! they are +pressed almost beyond bearing as it is; and, if we unfeelingly give +another turn to the machine, they will be crushed into atoms." + +This picture was not without its effect, even upon the obdurate mind of +Mr. Tyrrel.--"Well, sir, I am no tyrant. I know very well that tyranny +is a bad thing. But you do not infer from thence that these people are +to do as they please, and never meet with their deserts?" + +"Mr. Tyrrel, I see that you are shaken in your animosity. Suffer me to +hail the new-born benevolence of your nature. Go with me to Hawkins. Do +not let us talk of his deserts! Poor fellow! he has suffered almost all +that human nature can endure. Let your forgiveness upon this occasion be +the earnest of good neighbourhood and friendship between you and me." + +"No, sir, I will not go. I own there is something in what you say. I +always knew you had the wit to make good your own story, and tell a +plausible tale. But I will not be come over thus. It has been my +character, when I had once conceived a scheme of vengeance, never to +forego it; and I will not change that character. I took up Hawkins when +every body forsook him, and made a man of him; and the ungrateful rascal +has only insulted me for my pains. Curse me, if I ever forgive him! It +would be a good jest indeed, if I were to forgive the insolence of my +own creature at the desire of a man like you that has been my perpetual +plague." + +"For God's sake, Mr. Tyrrel, have some reason in your resentment! Let us +suppose that Hawkins has behaved unjustifiably, and insulted you: is +that an offence that never can be expiated? Must the father be ruined, +and the son hanged, to glut your resentment?" + +"Damn me, sir, but you may talk your heart out; you shall get nothing of +me. I shall never forgive myself for having listened to you for a +moment. I will suffer nobody to stop the stream of my resentment; if I +ever were to forgive him, it should be at nobody's, entreaty but my own. +But, sir, I never will. If he and all his family were at my feet, I +would order them all to be hanged the next minute, if my power were as +good as my will." + +"And this is your decision, is it? Mr. Tyrrel, I am ashamed of you! +Almighty God! to hear you talk gives one a loathing for the institutions +and regulations of society, and would induce one to fly the very face of +man! But, no! society casts you out; man abominates you. No wealth, no +rank, can buy out your stain. You will live deserted in the midst of +your species; you will go into crowded societies, and no one will deign +so much as to salute you. They will fly from your glance as they would +from the gaze of a basilisk. Where do you expect to find the hearts of +flint that shall sympathise with yours? You have the stamp of misery, +incessant, undivided, unpitied misery!" + +Thus saying, Mr. Falkland gave spurs to his horse, rudely pushed beside +Mr. Tyrrel, and was presently out of sight. Flaming indignation +annihilated even his favourite sense of honour, and he regarded his +neighbour as a wretch, with whom it was impossible even to enter into +contention. For the latter, he remained for the present motionless and +petrified. The glowing enthusiasm of Mr. Falkland was such as might well +have unnerved the stoutest foe. Mr. Tyrrel, in spite of himself, was +blasted with the compunctions of guilt, and unable to string himself +for the contest. The picture Mr. Falkland had drawn was prophetic. It +described what Mr. Tyrrel chiefly feared; and what in its commencements +he thought he already felt. It was responsive to the whispering of his +own meditations; it simply gave body and voice to the spectre that +haunted him, and to the terrors of which he was an hourly prey. + +By and by, however, he recovered. The more he had been temporarily +confounded, the fiercer was his resentment when he came to himself. Such +hatred never existed in a human bosom without marking its progress with +violence and death. Mr. Tyrrel, however, felt no inclination to have +recourse to personal defiance. He was the furthest in the world from a +coward; but his genius sunk before the genius of Falkland. He left his +vengeance to the disposal of circumstances. He was secure that his +animosity would never be forgotten nor diminished by the interposition +of any time or events. Vengeance was his nightly dream, and the +uppermost of his waking thoughts. + +Mr. Falkland had departed from this conference with a confirmed +disapprobation of the conduct of his neighbour, and an unalterable +resolution to do every thing in his power to relieve the distresses of +Hawkins. But he was too late. When he arrived, he found the house +already evacuated by its master. The family was removed nobody knew +whither; Hawkins had absconded, and, what was still more extraordinary, +the boy Hawkins had escaped on the very same day from the county gaol. +The enquiries Mr. Falkland set on foot after them were fruitless; no +traces could be found of the catastrophe of these unhappy people. That +catastrophe I shall shortly have occasion to relate, and it will be +found pregnant with horror, beyond what the blackest misanthropy could +readily have suggested. + +I go on with my tale. I go on to relate those incidents in which my own +fate was so mysteriously involved. I lift the curtain, and bring forward +the last act of the tragedy. + + + + +CHAPTER X. + + +It may easily be supposed, that the ill temper cherished by Mr. Tyrrel +in his contention with Hawkins, and the increasing animosity between him +and Mr. Falkland, added to the impatience with which he thought of the +escape of Emily. + +Mr. Tyrrel heard with astonishment of the miscarriage of an expedient, +of the success of which he had not previously entertained the slightest +suspicion. He became frantic with vexation. Grimes had not dared to +signify the event of his expedition in person, and the footman whom he +desired to announce to his master that Miss Melville was lost, the +moment after fled from his presence with the most dreadful +apprehensions. Presently he bellowed for Grimes, and the young man at +last appeared before him, more dead than alive. Grimes he compelled to +repeat the particulars of the tale; which he had no sooner done, than he +once again slunk away, shocked at the execrations with which Mr. Tyrrel +overwhelmed him. Grimes was no coward; but he reverenced the inborn +divinity that attends upon rank, as Indians worship the devil. Nor was +this all. The rage of Mr. Tyrrel was so ungovernable and fierce, that +few hearts could have been found so stout, as not to have trembled +before it with a sort of unconquerable inferiority. + +He no sooner obtained a moment's pause than he began to recall to his +tempestuous mind the various circumstances of the case. His complaints +were bitter; and, in a tranquil observer, might have produced the united +feeling of pity for his sufferings, and horror at his depravity. He +recollected all the precautions he had used; he could scarcely find a +flaw in the process; and he cursed that blind and malicious power which +delighted to cross his most deep-laid schemes. "Of this malice he was +beyond all other human beings the object. He was mocked with the shadow +of power; and when he lifted his hand to smite, it was struck with +sudden palsy. [In the bitterness of his anguish, he forgot his recent +triumph over Hawkins, or perhaps he regarded it less as a triumph, than +an overthrow, because it had failed of coming up to the extent of his +malice.] To what purpose had Heaven given him a feeling of injury, and +an instinct to resent, while he could in no case make his resentment +felt! It was only necessary for him to be the enemy of any person, to +insure that person's being safe against the reach of misfortune. What +insults, the most shocking and repeated, had he received from this +paltry girl! And by whom was she now torn from his indignation? By that +devil that haunted him at every moment, that crossed him at every step, +that fixed at pleasure his arrows in his heart, and made mows and +mockery at his insufferable tortures." + +There was one other reflection that increased his anguish, and made him +careless and desperate as to his future conduct. It was in vain to +conceal from himself that his reputation would be cruelly wounded by +this event. He had imagined that, while Emily was forced into this +odious marriage, she would be obliged by decorum, as soon as the event +was decided, to draw a veil over the compulsion she had suffered. But +this security was now lost, and Mr. Falkland would take a pride in +publishing his dishonour. Though the provocations he had received from +Miss Melville would, in his own opinion, have justified him in any +treatment he should have thought proper to inflict, he was sensible the +world would see the matter in a different light. This reflection +augmented the violence of his resolutions, and determined him to refuse +no means by which he could transfer the anguish that now preyed upon his +own mind to that of another. + +Meanwhile, the composure and magnanimity of Emily had considerably +subsided, the moment she believed herself in a place of safety. While +danger and injustice assailed her with their menaces, she found in +herself a courage that disdained to yield. The succeeding appearance of +calm was more fatal to her. There was nothing now, powerfully to foster +her courage or excite her energy. She looked back at the trials she had +passed, and her soul sickened at the recollection of that, which, while +it was in act, she had had the fortitude to endure. Till the period at +which Mr. Tyrrel had been inspired with this cruel antipathy, she had +been in all instances a stranger to anxiety and fear. Uninured to +misfortune, she had suddenly and without preparation been made the +subject of the most infernal malignity. When a man of robust and +vigorous constitution has a fit of sickness, it produces a more powerful +effect, than the same indisposition upon a delicate valetudinarian. Such +was the case with Miss Melville. She passed the succeeding night +sleepless and uneasy, and was found in the morning with a high fever. +Her distemper resisted for the present all attempts to assuage it, +though there was reason to hope that the goodness of her constitution, +assisted by tranquillity and the kindness of those about her, would +ultimately surmount it. On the second day she was delirious. On the +night of that day she was arrested at the suit of Mr. Tyrrel, for a debt +contracted for board and necessaries for the last fourteen years. + +The idea of this arrest, as the reader will perhaps recollect, first +occurred, in the conversation between Mr. Tyrrel and Miss Melville, soon +after he had thought proper to confine her to her chamber. But at that +time he had probably no serious conception of ever being induced to +carry it into execution. It had merely been mentioned by way of threat, +and as the suggestion of a mind, whose habits had long been accustomed +to contemplate every possible instrument of tyranny and revenge. But +now, that the unlooked-for rescue and escape of his poor kinswoman had +wrought up his thoughts to a degree of insanity, and that he revolved in +the gloomy recesses of his mind, how he might best shake off the load of +disappointment which oppressed him, the idea recurred with double force. +He was not long in forming his resolution; and, calling for Barnes his +steward, immediately gave him directions in what manner to proceed. + +Barnes had been for several years the instrument of Mr. Tyrrel's +injustice. His mind was hardened by use, and he could, without remorse, +officiate as the spectator, or even as the author and director, of a +scene of vulgar distress. But even he was somewhat startled upon the +present occasion. The character and conduct of Emily in Mr. Tyrrel's +family had been without a blot. She had not a single enemy; and it was +impossible to contemplate her youth, her vivacity, and her guileless +innocence, without emotions of sympathy and compassion. + +"Your worship?--I do not understand you!--Arrest Miss--Miss Emily!" + +"Yes,--I tell you!--What is the matter with you?--Go instantly to +Swineard, the lawyer, and bid him finish the business out of hand!" + +"Lord love your honour! Arrest her! Why she does not owe you a brass +farthing: she always lived upon your charity!" + +"Ass! Scoundrel! I tell you she does owe me,--owes me eleven hundred +pounds.--The law justifies it.--What do you think laws were made for? I +do nothing but right, and right I will have." + +"Your honour, I never questioned your orders in my life; but I must now. +I cannot see you ruin Miss Emily, poor girl! nay, and yourself too, for +the matter of that, and not say which way you are going. I hope you will +bear with me. Why, if she owed you ever so much, she cannot be arrested. +She is not of age." + +"Will you have done?--Do not tell me of--It cannot, and It can. It has +been done before,--and it shall be done again. Let him dispute it that +dares! I will do it now and stand to it afterwards. Tell Swineard,--if +he make the least boggling, it is as much as his life is worth;--he +shall starve by inches." + +"Pray, your honour, think better of it. Upon my life, the whole country +will cry shame of it." + +"Barnes!--What do you mean? I am not used to be talked to, and I cannot +hear it! You have been a good fellow to me upon many occasions--But, if +I find you out for making one with them that dispute my authority, damn +my soul, if I do not make you sick of your life!" + +"I have done, your honour. I will not say another word except this,--I +have heard as how that Miss Emily is sick a-bed. You are determined, you +say, to put her in jail. You do not mean to kill her, I take it." + +"Let her die! I will not spare her for an hour--I will not always be +insulted. She had no consideration for me, and I have no mercy for +her.--I am in for it! They have provoked me past bearing,--and they +shall feel me! Tell Swineard, in bed or up, day or night, I will not +hear of an instant's delay." + +Such were the directions of Mr. Tyrrel, and in strict conformity to his +directions were the proceedings of that respectable limb of the law he +employed upon the present occasion. Miss Melville had been delirious, +through a considerable part of the day on the evening of which the +bailiff and his follower arrived. By the direction of the physician whom +Mr. Falkland had ordered to attend her, a composing draught was +administered; and, exhausted as she was by the wild and distracted +images that for several hours had haunted her fancy, she was now sunk +into a refreshing slumber. Mrs. Hammond, the sister of Mrs. Jakeman, was +sitting by her bed-side, full of compassion for the lovely sufferer, and +rejoicing in the calm tranquillity that had just taken possession of +her, when a little girl, the only child of Mrs. Hammond, opened the +street-door to the rap of the bailiff He said he wanted to speak with +Miss Melville, and the child answered that she would go tell her mother. +So saying, she advanced to the door of the back-room upon the +ground-floor, in which Emily lay; but the moment it was opened, instead +of waiting for the appearance of the mother, the bailiff entered along +with the girl. + +Mrs. Hammond looked up. "Who are you?" said she. "Why do you come in +here? Hush! be quiet!' + +"I must speak with Miss Melville." + +"Indeed, but you must not. Tell me your business. The poor child has +been light-headed all day. She has just fallen asleep, and must not be +disturbed." + +"That is no business of mine. I must obey orders." + +"Orders? Whose orders? What is it you mean?" + +At this moment Emily opened her eyes. "What noise is that? Pray let me +be quiet." + +"Miss, I want to speak with you. I have got a writ against you for +eleven hundred pounds at the suit of squire Tyrrel." + +At these words both Mrs. Hammond and Emily were dumb. The latter was +scarcely able to annex any meaning to the intelligence; and, though Mrs. +Hammond was somewhat better acquainted with the sort of language that +was employed, yet in this strange and unexpected connection it was +almost as mysterious to her as to poor Emily herself. + +"A writ? How can she be in Mr. Tyrrel's debt? A writ against a child!" + +"It is no signification putting your questions to us. We only do as we +are directed. There is our authority. Look at it." + +"Lord Almighty!" exclaimed Mrs. Hammond, "what does this mean? It is +impossible Mr. Tyrrel should have sent you." + +"Good woman, none of your jabber to us! Cannot you read?" + +"This is all a trick! The paper is forged! It is a vile contrivance to +get the poor orphan out of the hands of those with whom only she can be +safe. Proceed upon it at your peril!" + +"Rest you content; that is exactly what we mean to do. Take my word, we +know very well what we are about." + +"Why, you would not tear her from her bed? I tell you, she is in a high +fever; she is light-headed; it would be death to remove her! You are +bailiffs, are not you? You are not murderers?" + +"The law says nothing about that. We have orders to take her sick or +well. We will do her no harm except so far as we must perform our +office, be it how it will." + +"Where would you take her? What is it you mean to do?" + +"To the county jail. Bullock, go, order a post-chaise from the Griffin!" + +"Stay, I say! Give no such orders! Wait only three hours; I will send +off a messenger express to squire Falkland, and I am sure he will +satisfy you as to any harm that can come to you, without its being +necessary to take the poor child to jail." + +"We have particular directions against that. We are not at liberty to +lose a minute. Why are not you gone? Order the horses to be put to +immediately!" + +Emily had listened to the course of this conversation, which had +sufficiently explained to her whatever was enigmatical in the first +appearance of the bailiffs. The painful and incredible reality that was +thus presented effectually dissipated the illusions of frenzy to which +she had just been a prey. "My dear Madam," said she to Mrs. Hammond, "do +not harass yourself with useless efforts. I am very sorry for all the +trouble I have given you. But my misfortune is inevitable. Sir, if you +will step into the next room, I will dress myself, and attend you +immediately." + +Mrs. Hammond began to be equally aware that her struggles were to no +purpose; but she could not be equally patient. At one moment she raved +upon the brutality of Mr. Tyrrel, whom she affirmed to be a devil +incarnate, and not a man. At another she expostulated, with bitter +invective, against the hardheartedness of the bailiff, and exhorted him +to mix some humanity and moderation with the discharge of his function; +but he was impenetrable to all she could urge. In the mean while Emily +yielded with the sweetest resignation to an inevitable evil. Mrs. +Hammond insisted that, at least, they should permit her to attend her +young lady in the chaise; and the bailiff, though the orders he had +received were so peremptory that he dared not exercise his discretion as +to the execution of the writ, began to have some apprehensions of +danger, and was willing to admit of any precaution that was not in +direct hostility to his functions. For the rest he understood, that it +was in all cases dangerous to allow sickness, or apparent unfitness for +removal, as a sufficient cause to interrupt a direct process; and that, +accordingly, in all doubtful questions and presumptive murders, the +practice of the law inclined, with a laudable partiality, to the +vindication of its own officers. In addition to these general rules, he +was influenced by the positive injunctions and assurances of Swineard, +and the terror which, through a circle of many miles, was annexed to the +name of Tyrrel. Before they departed, Mrs. Hammond despatched a +messenger with a letter of three lines to Mr. Falkland, informing him of +this extraordinary event. Mr. Falkland was from home when the messenger +arrived, and not expected to return till the second day; accident seemed +in this instance to favour the vengeance of Mr. Tyrrel, for he had +himself been too much under the dominion of an uncontrollable fury, to +take a circumstance of this sort into his estimate. + +The forlorn state of these poor women, who were conducted, the one by +compulsion, the other a volunteer, to a scene so little adapted to their +accommodation as that of a common jail, may easily be imagined Mrs. +Hammond, however, was endowed with a masculine courage and impetuosity +of spirit, eminently necessary in the difficulties they had to +encounter. She was in some degree fitted by a sanguine temper, and an +impassioned sense of injustice, for the discharge of those very offices +which sobriety and calm reflection might have prescribed. The health of +Miss Melville was materially affected by the surprise and removal she +had undergone at the very time that repose was most necessary for her +preservation. Her fever became more violent; her delirium was stronger; +and the tortures of her imagination were proportioned to the +unfavourableness of the state in which the removal had been effected. It +was highly improbable that she could recover. + +In the moments of suspended reason she was perpetually calling on the +name of Falkland. Mr. Falkland, she said, was her first and only love, +and he should be her husband. A moment after she exclaimed upon him in a +disconsolate, yet reproachful tone, for his unworthy deference to the +prejudices of the world. It was very cruel of him to show himself so +proud, and tell her that he would never consent to marry a beggar. But, +if he were proud, she was determined to be proud too. He should see that +she would not conduct herself like a slighted maiden, and that, though +he could reject her, it was not in his power to break her heart. At +another time she imagined she saw Mr. Tyrrel and his engine Grimes, +their hands and garments dropping with blood: and the pathetic +reproaches she vented against them might have affected a heart of stone. +Then the figure of Falkland presented itself to her distracted fancy, +deformed with wounds, and of a deadly paleness, and she shrieked with +agony, while she exclaimed that such was the general hardheartedness, +that no one would make the smallest exertion for his rescue. In such +vicissitudes of pain, perpetually imagining to her self unkindness, +insult, conspiracy, and murder, she passed a considerable part of two +days. + +On the evening of the second Mr. Falkland arrived, accompanied by Doctor +Wilson, the physician by whom she had previously been attended. The +scene he was called upon to witness was such as to be most exquisitely +agonising to a man of his acute sensibility. The news of the arrest had +given him an inexpressible shock; he was transported out of himself at +the unexampled malignity of its author. But, when he saw the figure of +Miss Melville, haggard, and a warrant of death written in her +countenance, a victim to the diabolical passions of her kinsman, it +seemed too much to be endured. When he entered, she was in the midst of +one of her fits of delirium, and immediately mistook her visitors for +two assassins. She asked, where they had hid her Falkland, her lord, her +life, her husband! and demanded that they should restore to her his +mangled corpse, that she might embrace him with her dying arms, breathe +her last upon his lips, and be buried in the same grave. She reproached +them with the sordidness of their conduct in becoming the tools of her +vile cousin, who had deprived her of her reason, and would never be +contented till he had murdered her. Mr. Falkland tore himself away from +this painful scene, and, leaving Doctor Wilson with his patient, desired +him, when he had given the necessary directions, to follow him to his +inn. + +The perpetual hurry of spirits in which Miss Melville had been kept for +several days, by the nature of her indisposition, was extremely +exhausting to her; and, in about an hour from the visit of Mr. Falkland, +her delirium subsided, and left her in so low a state as to render it +difficult to perceive any signs of life. Doctor Wilson, who had +withdrawn, to soothe, if possible, the disturbed and impatient thoughts +of Mr. Falkland, was summoned afresh upon this change of symptoms, and +sat by the bed-side during the remainder of the night. The situation of +his patient was such, as to keep him in momentary apprehension of her +decease. While Miss Melville lay in this feeble and exhausted condition, +Mrs. Hammond betrayed every token of the tenderest anxiety. Her +sensibility was habitually of the acutest sort, and the qualities of +Emily were such as powerfully to fix her affection. She loved her like a +mother. Upon the present occasion, every sound, every motion, made her +tremble. Doctor Wilson had introduced another nurse, in consideration of +the incessant fatigue Mrs. Hammond had undergone; and he endeavoured, by +representations, and even by authority, to compel her to quit the +apartment of the patient. But she was uncontrollable; and he at length +found that he should probably do her more injury, by the violence that +would be necessary to separate her from the suffering innocent, than by +allowing her to follow her inclination. Her eye was a thousand times +turned, with the most eager curiosity, upon the countenance of Doctor +Wilson, without her daring to breathe a question respecting his opinion, +lest he should answer her by a communication of the most fatal tidings. +In the mean time she listened with the deepest attention to every thing +that dropped either from the physician or the nurse, hoping to collect +as it were from some oblique hint, the intelligence which she had not +courage expressly to require. + +Towards morning the state of the patient seemed to take a favourable +turn. She dozed for near two hours, and, when she awoke, appeared +perfectly calm and sensible. Understanding that Mr. Falkland had +brought the physician to attend her, and was himself in her +neighbourhood, she requested to see him. Mr. Falkland had gone in the +mean time, with one of his tenants, to bail the debt, and now entered +the prison to enquire whether the young lady might be safely removed, +from her present miserable residence, to a more airy and commodious +apartment. When he appeared, the sight of him revived in the mind of +Miss Melville an imperfect recollection of the wanderings of her +delirium. She covered her face with her fingers, and betrayed the most +expressive confusion, while she thanked him, with her usual unaffected +simplicity, for the trouble he had taken. She hoped she should not give +him much more; she thought she should get better. It was a shame, she +said, if a young and lively girl, as she was, could not contrive to +outlive the trifling misfortunes to which she had been subjected. But, +while she said this, she was still extremely weak. She tried to assume a +cheerful countenance; but it was a faint effort, which the feeble state +of her frame did not seem sufficient to support. Mr. Falkland and the +doctor joined to request her to keep herself quiet, and avoid for the +present all occasions of exertion. + +Encouraged by these appearances, Mrs. Hammond ventured to follow the two +gentlemen out of the room, in order to learn from the physician what +hopes he entertained. Doctor Wilson acknowledged, that he found his +patient at first in a very unfavourable situation, that the symptoms +were changed for the better, and that he was not without some +expectation of her recovery. He added, however, that he could answer for +nothing, that the next twelve hours would be exceedingly critical, but +that if she did not grow worse before morning, he would then undertake +for her life. Mrs. Hammond, who had hitherto seen nothing but despair, +now became frantic with joy. She burst into tears of transport, blessed +the physician in the most emphatic and impassioned terms, and uttered a +thousand extravagancies. Doctor Wilson seized this opportunity to press +her to give herself a little repose, to which she consented, a bed being +first procured for her in the room next to Miss Melville's, she having +charged the nurse to give her notice of any alteration in the state of +the patient. + +Mrs. Hammond enjoyed an uninterrupted sleep of several hours. It was +already night, when she was awaked by an unusual bustle in the next +room. She listened for a few moments, and then determined to go and +discover the occasion of it. As she opened her door for that purpose, +she met the nurse coming to her. The countenance of the messenger told +her what it was she had to communicate, without the use of words. She +hurried to the bed-side, and found Miss Melville expiring. The +appearances that had at first been so encouraging were of short +duration. The calm of the morning proved to be only a sort of lightening +before death. In a few hours the patient grew worse. The bloom of her +countenance faded; she drew her breath with difficulty; and her eyes +became fixed. Doctor Wilson came in at this period, and immediately +perceived that all was over. She was for some time in convulsions; but, +these subsiding, she addressed the physician with a composed, though +feeble voice. She thanked him for his attention; and expressed the most +lively sense of her obligations to Mr. Falkland. She sincerely forgave +her cousin, and hoped he might never be visited by too acute a +recollection of his barbarity to her. She would have been contented to +live. Few persons had a sincerer relish of the pleasures of life; but +she was well pleased to die, rather than have become the wife of Grimes. +As Mrs. Hammond entered, she turned her countenance towards her, and +with an affectionate expression repeated her name. This was her last +word; in less than two hours from that time she breathed her last in the +arms of this faithful friend. + + + + +CHAPTER XI. + + +Such was the fate of Miss Emily Melville. Perhaps tyranny never +exhibited a more painful memorial of the detestation in which it +deserves to be held. The idea irresistibly excited in every spectator of +the scene, was that of regarding Mr. Tyrrel as the most diabolical +wretch that had ever dishonoured the human form. The very attendants +upon this house of oppression, for the scene was acted upon too public a +stage not to be generally understood, expressed their astonishment and +disgust at his unparalleled cruelty. + +If such were the feelings of men bred to the commission of injustice, it +is difficult to say what must have been those of Mr. Falkland. He raved, +he swore, he beat his head, he rent up his hair. He was unable to +continue in one posture, and to remain in one place. He burst away from +the spot with vehemence, as if he sought to leave behind him his +recollection and his existence. He seemed to tear up the ground with +fierceness and rage. He returned soon again. He approached the sad +remains of what had been Emily, and gazed on them with such intentness, +that his eyes appeared, ready to burst from their sockets. Acute and +exquisite as were his notions of virtue and honour, he could not prevent +himself from reproaching the system of nature, for having given birth to +such a monster as Tyrrel. He was ashamed of himself for wearing the same +form. He could not think of the human species with patience. He foamed +with indignation against the laws of the universe, that did not permit +him to crush such reptiles at a blow, as we would crush so many noxious +insects. It was necessary to guard him like a madman. + +The whole office of judging what was proper to be done under the present +circumstances devolved upon Doctor Wilson. The doctor was a man of cool +and methodical habits of acting. One of the first ideas that suggested +itself to him was, that Miss Melvile was a branch of the family of +Tyrrel. He did not doubt of the willingness of Mr. Falkland to discharge +every expense that might be further incident to the melancholy remains +of this unfortunate victim; but he conceived that the laws of fashion +and decorum required some notification of the event to be made to the +head of the family. Perhaps, too, he had an eye to his interest in his +profession, and was reluctant to expose himself to the resentment of a +person of Mr. Tyrrel's consideration in the neighbourhood. But, with +this weakness, he had nevertheless some feelings in common with the rest +of the world, and must have suffered considerable violence, before he +could have persuaded himself to be the messenger; beside which, he did +not think it right in the present situation to leave Mr. Falkland. + +Doctor Wilson no sooner mentioned these ideas, than they seemed to make +a sudden impression on Mrs. Hammond, and she earnestly requested that +she might be permitted to carry the intelligence. The proposal was +unexpected; but the doctor did not very obstinately refuse his assent. +She was determined, she said, to see what sort of impression the +catastrophe would make upon the author of it; and she promised to +comport herself with moderation and civility. The journey was soon +performed. + +"I am come, sir," said she to Mr. Tyrrel, "to inform you that your +cousin, Miss Melville, died this afternoon." + +"Died?" + +"Yes, sir. I saw her die. She died in these arms." + +"Died? Who killed her? What do you mean?" + +"Who? Is it for you to ask that question? Your cruelty and malice killed +her!" + +"Me?--my?--Poh! she is not dead--it cannot be--it is not a week since +she left this house." + +"Do not you believe me? I say she is dead!" + +"Have a care, woman! this is no matter for jesting. No: though she used +me ill, I would not believe her dead for all the world!" + +Mrs. Hammond shook her head in a manner expressive at once of grief and +indignation. + +"No, no, no, no! I will never believe that!--No, never!" + +"Will you come with me, and convince your eyes? It is a sight worthy of +you; and will be a feast to such a heart as yours!"--Saying this, Mrs. +Hammond offered her hand, as if to conduct him to the spot. + +Mr. Tyrrel shrunk back. + +"If she be dead, what is that to me? Am I to answer for every thing that +goes wrong in the world?--What do you come here for? Why bring your +messages to me?" + +"To whom should I bring them but to her kinsman,--and her murderer." + +"Murderer?--Did I employ knives or pistols? Did I give her poison? I did +nothing but what the law allows. If she be dead, nobody can say that I +am to blame!" + +"To blame?--All the world will abhor and curse you. Were you such a +fool as to think, because men pay respect to wealth and rank, this would +extend to such a deed? They will laugh at so barefaced a cheat. The +meanest beggar will spurn and spit at you. Ay, you may well stand +confounded at what you have done. I will proclaim you to the whole +world, and you will be obliged to fly the very face of a human +creature!" + +"Good woman," said Mr. Tyrrel, extremely humbled, "talk no more in this +strain!--Emmy is not dead! I am sure--I hope--she is not dead!--Tell me +that you have only been deceiving me, and I will forgive you every +thing--I will forgive her--I will take her into favour--I will do any +thing you please!--I never meant her any harm!" + +"I tell you she is dead! You have murdered the sweetest innocent that +lived! Can you bring her back to life, as you have driven her out of it? +If you could, I would kneel to you twenty times a day! What is it you +have done?--Miserable wretch! did you think you could do and undo, and +change things this way and that, as you pleased?" + +The reproaches of Mrs. Hammond were the first instance in which Mr. +Tyrrel was made to drink the full cup of retribution. This was, however, +only a specimen of a long series of contempt, abhorrence, and insult, +that was reserved for him. The words of Mrs. Hammond were prophetic. It +evidently appeared, that though wealth and hereditary elevation operate +as an apology for many delinquencies, there are some which so +irresistibly address themselves to the indignation of mankind, that, +like death, they level all distinctions, and reduce their perpetrator to +an equality with the most indigent and squalid of his species. Against +Mr. Tyrrel, as the tyrannical and unmanly murderer of Emily, those who +dared not venture the unreserved avowal of their sentiments muttered +curses, deep, not loud; while the rest joined in an universal cry of +abhorrence and execration. He stood astonished at the novelty of his +situation. Accustomed as he had been to the obedience and trembling +homage of mankind, he had imagined they would be perpetual, and that no +excess on his part would ever be potent enough to break the enchantment. +Now he looked round, and saw sullen detestation in every face, which +with difficulty restrained itself, and upon the slightest provocation +broke forth with an impetuous tide, and swept away the mounds of +subordination and fear. His large estate could not purchase civility +from the gentry, the peasantry, scarcely from his own servants. In the +indignation of all around him he found a ghost that haunted him with +every change of place, and a remorse that stung his conscience, and +exterminated his peace. The neighbourhood appeared more and more every +day to be growing too hot for him to endure, and it became evident that +he would ultimately be obliged to quit the country. Urged by the +flagitiousness of this last example, people learned to recollect every +other instance of his excesses, and it was, no doubt, a fearful +catalogue that rose up in judgment against him. It seemed as if the +sense of public resentment had long been gathering strength unperceived, +and now burst forth into insuppressible violence. + +There was scarcely a human being upon whom this sort of retribution +could have sat more painfully than upon Mr. Tyrrel. Though he had not a +consciousness of innocence prompting him continually to recoil from the +detestation of mankind as a thing totally unallied to his character, yet +the imperiousness of his temper and the constant experience he had had +of the pliability of other men, prepared him to feel the general and +undisguised condemnation into which he was sunk with uncommon emotions +of anger and impatience. That he, at the beam of whose eye every +countenance fell, and to whom in the fierceness of his wrath no one was +daring enough to reply, should now be regarded with avowed dislike, and +treated with unceremonious censure, was a thing he could not endure to +recollect or believe. Symptoms of the universal disgust smote him at +every instant, and at every blow he writhed with intolerable anguish. +His rage was unbounded and raving. He repelled every attack with the +fiercest indignation; while the more he struggled, the more desperate +his situation appeared to become. At length he determined to collect his +strength for a decisive effort, and to meet the whole tide of public +opinion in a single scene. + +In pursuance of these thoughts he resolved to repair, without delay, to +the rural assembly which I have already mentioned in the course of my +story. Miss Melville had now been dead one month. Mr. Falkland had been +absent the last week in a distant part of the country, and was not +expected to return for a week longer. Mr. Tyrrel willingly embraced the +opportunity, trusting, if he could now effect his re-establishment, that +he should easily preserve the ground he had gained, even in the face of +his formidable rival. Mr. Tyrrel was not deficient in courage; but he +conceived the present to be too important an epoch in his life to allow +him to make any unnecessary risk in his chance for future ease and +importance. + +There was a sort of bustle that took place at his entrance into the +assembly, it having been agreed by the gentlemen of the assembly, that +Mr. Tyrrel was to be refused admittance, as a person with whom they did +not choose to associate. This vote had already been notified to him by +letter by the master of the ceremonies, but the intelligence was rather +calculated, with a man of Mr. Tyrrel's disposition, to excite defiance +than to overawe. At the door of the assembly he was personally met by +the master of the ceremonies, who had perceived the arrival of an +equipage, and who now endeavoured to repeat his prohibition: but he was +thrust aside by Mr. Tyrrel with an air of native authority and ineffable +contempt. As he entered; every eye was turned upon him. Presently all +the gentlemen in the room assembled round him. Some endeavoured to +hustle him, and others began to expostulate. But he found the secret +effectually to silence the one set, and to shake off the other. His +muscular form, the well-known eminence of his intellectual powers, the +long habits to which every man was formed of acknowledging his +ascendancy, were all in his favour. He considered himself as playing a +desperate stake, and had roused all the energies he possessed, to enable +him to do justice to so interesting a transaction. Disengaged from the +insects that at first pestered him, he paced up and down the room with a +magisterial stride, and flashed an angry glance on every side. He then +broke silence. "If any one had any thing to say to him, he should know +where and how to answer him. He would advise any such person, however, +to consider well what he was about. If any man imagined he had any thing +personally to complain of, it was very well. But he did expect that +nobody there would be ignorant and raw enough to meddle with what was no +business of theirs, and intrude into the concerns of any man's private +family." + +This being a sort of defiance, one and another gentleman advanced to +answer it. He that was first began to speak; but Mr. Tyrrel, by the +expression of his countenance and a peremptory tone, by well-timed +interruptions and pertinent insinuations, caused him first to hesitate, +and then to be silent. He seemed to be fast advancing to the triumph he +had promised himself. The whole company were astonished. They felt the +same abhorrence and condemnation of his character; but they could not +help admiring the courage and resources he displayed upon the present +occasion. They could without difficulty have concentred afresh their +indignant feelings, but they seemed to want a leader. + +At this critical moment Mr. Falkland entered the room. Mere accident had +enabled him to return sooner than he expected. + +Both he and Mr. Tyrrel reddened at sight of each other. He advanced +towards Mr. Tyrrel without a moment's pause, and in a peremptory voice +asked him what he did there? + +"Here? What do you mean by that? This place is as free to me as you, and +you are the last person to whom I shall deign to give an account of +myself." + +"Sir, the place is not free to you. Do not you know, you have been voted +out? Whatever were your rights, your infamous conduct has forfeited +them." + +"Mr. what do you call yourself, if you have anything to say to me, +choose a proper time and place. Do not think to put on your bullying +airs under shelter of this company! I will not endure it." + +"You are mistaken, sir. This public scene is the only place where I can +have any thing to say to you. If you would not hear the universal +indignation of mankind, you must not come into the society of men.--Miss +Melville!--Shame upon you, inhuman, unrelenting tyrant! Can you hear her +name, and not sink into the earth? Can you retire into solitude, and not +see her pale and patient ghost rising to reproach you? Can you recollect +her virtues, her innocence, her spotless manners, her unresentful +temper, and not run distracted with remorse? Have you not killed her in +the first bloom of her youth? Can you bear to think that she now lies +mouldering in the grave through your cursed contrivance, that deserved a +crown, ten thousand times more than you deserve to live? And do you +expect that mankind will ever forget, or forgive such a deed? Go, +miserable wretch; think yourself too happy that you are permitted to fly +the face of man! Why, what a pitiful figure do you make at this moment! +Do you think that any thing could bring so hardened a wretch as you are +to shrink from reproach, if your conscience were not in confederacy with +them that reproached you? And were you fool enough to believe that any +obstinacy, however determined, could enable you to despise the keen +rebuke of justice? Go, shrink into your miserable self! Begone, and let +me never be blasted with your sight again!" + +And here, incredible as it may appear, Mr. Tyrrel began to obey his +imperious censurer. His looks were full of wildness and horror; his +limbs trembled; and his tongue refused its office. He felt no power of +resisting the impetuous torrent of reproach that was poured upon him. He +hesitated; he was ashamed of his own defeat; he seemed to wish to deny +it. But his struggles were ineffectual; every attempt perished in the +moment it was made. The general voice was eager to abash him. As his +confusion became more visible, the outcry increased. It swelled +gradually to hootings, tumult, and a deafening noise of indignation. At +length he willingly retired from the public scene, unable any longer to +endure the sensations it inflicted. + +In about an hour and a half he returned. No precaution had been taken +against this incident, for nothing could be more unexpected. In the +interval he had intoxicated himself with large draughts of brandy. In a +moment he was in a part of the room where Mr. Falkland was standing, and +with one blow of his muscular arm levelled him with the earth. The blow +however was not stunning, and Mr. Falkland rose again immediately. It is +obvious to perceive how unequal he must have been in this species of +contest. He was scarcely risen before Mr. Tyrrel repeated his blow. Mr. +Falkland was now upon his guard, and did not fall. But the blows of his +adversary were redoubled with a rapidity difficult to conceive, and Mr. +Falkland was once again brought to the earth. In this situation Mr. +Tyrrel kicked his prostrate enemy, and stooped apparently with the +intention of dragging him along the floor. All this passed in a moment, +and the gentlemen present had not time to recover their surprise. They +now interfered, and Mr. Tyrrel once more quitted the apartment. + +It is difficult to conceive any event more terrible to the individual +upon whom it fell, than the treatment which Mr. Falkland in this +instance experienced. Every passion of his life was calculated to make +him feel it more acutely. He had repeatedly exerted an uncommon energy +and prudence, to prevent the misunderstanding between Mr. Tyrrel and +himself from proceeding to extremities; but in vain! It was closed with +a catastrophe, exceeding all that he had feared, or that the most +penetrating foresight could have suggested. To Mr. Falkland disgrace was +worse than death. The slightest breath of dishonour would have stung him +to the very soul. What must it have been with this complication of +ignominy, base, humiliating, and public? Could Mr. Tyrrel have +understood the evil he inflicted, even he, under all his circumstances +of provocation, could scarcely have perpetrated it. Mr. Falkland's mind +was full of uproar like the war of contending elements, and of such +suffering as casts contempt on the refinements of inventive cruelty. He +wished for annihilation, to lie down in eternal oblivion, in an +insensibility, which, compared with what he experienced, was scarcely +less enviable than beatitude itself. Horror, detestation, revenge, +inexpressible longings to shake off the evil, and a persuasion that in +this case all effort was powerless, filled his soul even to bursting. + +One other event closed the transactions of this memorable evening. Mr. +Falkland was baffled of the vengeance that yet remained to him. Mr. +Tyrrel was found by some of the company dead in the street, having been +murdered at the distance of a few yards from the assembly house. + + + + +CHAPTER XII. + + +I shall endeavour to state the remainder of this narrative in the words +of Mr. Collins. The reader has already had occasion to perceive that Mr. +Collins was a man of no vulgar order; and his reflections on the subject +were uncommonly judicious. + +"This day was the crisis of Mr. Falkland's history. From hence took its +beginning that gloomy and unsociable melancholy, of which he has since +been the victim. No two characters can be in certain respects more +strongly contrasted, than the Mr. Falkland of a date prior and +subsequent to these events. Hitherto he had been attended by a fortune +perpetually prosperous. His mind was sanguine; full of that undoubting +confidence in its own powers which prosperity is qualified to produce. +Though the habits of his life were those of a serious and sublime +visionary they were nevertheless full of cheerfulness and tranquillity. +But from this moment, his pride, and the lofty adventurousness of his +spirit, were effectually subdued. From an object of envy he was changed +into an object of compassion. Life, which hitherto no one had more +exquisitely enjoyed, became a burden to him. No more self-complacency, +no more rapture, no more self-approving and heart-transporting +benevolence! He who had lived beyond any man upon the grand and +animating reveries of the imagination, seemed now to have no visions but +of anguish and despair. His case was peculiarly worthy of sympathy, +since, no doubt, if rectitude and purity of disposition could give a +title to happiness, few men could exhibit a more consistent and powerful +claim than Mr. Falkland. + +"He was too deeply pervaded with the idle and groundless romances of +chivalry, ever to forget the situation, humiliating and dishonourable +according to his ideas, in which he had been placed upon this occasion. +There is a mysterious sort of divinity annexed to the person of a true +knight, that makes any species of brute violence committed upon it +indelible and immortal. To be knocked down, cuffed, kicked, dragged +along the floor! Sacred heaven, the memory of such a treatment was not +to be endured! No future lustration could ever remove the stain: and, +what was perhaps still worse in the present case, the offender having +ceased to exist, the lustration which the laws of knight-errantry +prescribe was rendered impossible. + +"In some future period of human improvement, it is probable, that that +calamity will be in a manner unintelligible, which in the present +instance contributed to tarnish and wither the excellence of one of the +most elevated and amiable of human minds. If Mr. Falkland had reflected +with perfect accuracy upon the case, he would probably have been able +to look down with indifference upon a wound, which, as it was, pierced +to his very vitals. How much more dignity, than in the modern duellist, +do we find in Themistocles, the most gallant of the Greeks; who, when +Eurybiades, his commander in chief, in answer to some of his +remonstrances, lifted his cane over him with a menacing air, accosted +him in that noble apostrophe, 'Strike, but hear!' + +"How would a man of true discernment in such a case reply to his brutal +assailant? 'I make it my boast that I can endure calamity and pain: +shall I not be able to endure the trifling inconvenience that your folly +can inflict upon me? Perhaps a human being would be more accomplished, +if he understood the science of personal defence; but how few would be +the occasions upon which he would be called to exert it? How few persons +would he encounter so unjust and injurious as you, if his own conduct +were directed by the principles of reason and benevolence? Beside, how +narrow would be the use of this science when acquired? It will scarcely +put the man of delicate make and petty stature upon a level with the +athletic pugilist; and, if it did in some measure secure me against the +malice of a single adversary, still my person and my life, so far as +mere force is concerned, would always be at the mercy of two. Further +than immediate defence against actual violence, it could never be of use +to me. The man who can deliberately meet his adversary for the purpose +of exposing the person of one or both of them to injury, tramples upon +every principle of reason and equity. Duelling is the vilest of all +egotism, treating the public, who has a claim to all my powers and +exertions, as if it were nothing, and myself, or rather an +unintelligible chimera I annex to myself, as if it were entitled to my +exclusive attention. I am unable to cope with you: what then? Can that +circumstance dishonour me? No; I can only be dishonoured by perpetrating +an unjust action. My honour is in my own keeping, beyond the reach of +all mankind. Strike! I am passive. No injury that you can inflict, shall +provoke me to expose you or myself to unnecessary evil. I refuse that; +but I am not therefore pusillanimous: when I refuse any danger or +suffering by which the general good may be promoted, then brand me for a +coward! + +"These reasonings, however simple and irresistible they must be found by +a dispassionate enquirer, are little reflected on by the world at large, +and were most of all uncongenial to the prejudices of Mr. Falkland. + +"But the public disgrace and chastisement that had been imposed upon +him, intolerable as they were to be recollected, were not the whole of +the mischief that redounded to our unfortunate patron from the +transactions of that day. It was presently whispered that he was no +other than the murderer of his antagonist. This rumour was of too much +importance to the very continuance of his life, to justify its being +concealed from him. He heard it with inexpressible astonishment and +horror; it formed a dreadful addition to the load of intellectual +anguish that already oppressed him. No man had ever held his reputation +more dear than Mr. Falkland; and now, in one day, he was fallen under +the most exquisite calamities, a complicated personal insult, and the +imputation of the foulest of crimes. He might have fled; for no one was +forward to proceed against a man so adored as Mr. Falkland, or in +revenge of one so universally execrated as Mr. Tyrrel. But flight he +disdained. In the mean time the affair was of the most serious +magnitude, and the rumour unchecked seemed daily to increase in +strength. Mr. Falkland appeared sometimes inclined to adopt such steps +as might have been best calculated to bring the imputation to a speedy +trial. But he probably feared, by too direct an appeal to judicature, to +render more precise an imputation, the memory of which he deprecated; at +the same time that he was sufficiently willing to meet the severest +scrutiny, and, if he could not hope to have it forgotten that he had +ever been accused, to prove in the most satisfactory manner that the +accusation was unjust. + +"The neighbouring magistrates at length conceived it necessary to take +some steps upon the subject. Without causing Mr. Falkland to be +apprehended, they sent to desire he would appear before them at one of +their meetings. The proceeding being thus opened, Mr. Falkland expressed +his hope that, if the business were likely to stop there, their +investigation might at least be rendered as solemn as possible. The +meeting was numerous; every person of a respectable class in society was +admitted to be an auditor; the whole town, one of the most considerable +in the county, was apprised of the nature of the business. Few trials, +invested with all the forms of judgment, have excited so general an +interest. A trial, under the present circumstances, was scarcely +attainable; and it seemed to be the wish both of principal and umpires, +to give to this transaction all the momentary notoriety and decisiveness +of a trial. + +"The magistrates investigated the particulars of the story. Mr. +Falkland, it appeared, had left the rooms immediately after his +assailant; and though he had been attended by one or two of the +gentlemen to his inn, it was proved that he had left them upon some +slight occasion, as soon as he arrived at it, and that, when they +enquired for him of the waiters, he had already mounted his horse and +ridden home. + +"By the nature of the case, no particular facts could be stated in +balance against these. As soon as they had been sufficiently detailed, +Mr. Falkland therefore proceeded to his defence. Several copies of his +defence were-made, and Mr. Falkland seemed, for a short time, to have +had the idea of sending it to the press, though, for some reason or +other, he afterwards suppressed it. I have one of the copies in my +possession, and I will read it to you." + +Saying this, Mr. Collins rose, and took it from a private drawer in his +escritoire. During this action he appeared to recollect himself. He did +not, in the strict sense of the word, hesitate; but he was prompted to +make some apology for what he was doing. + +"You seem never to have heard of this memorable transaction; and, +indeed, that is little to be wondered at, since the good nature of the +world is interested in suppressing it, and it is deemed a disgrace to a +man to have defended himself from a criminal imputation, though with +circumstances the most satisfactory and honourable. It may be supposed +that this suppression is particularly acceptable to Mr. Falkland; and I +should not have acted in contradiction to his modes of thinking in +communicating the story to you, had there not been circumstances of +peculiar urgency, that seemed to render the communication desirable." +Saying this, he proceeded to read from the paper in his hand. + +"Gentlemen, + +"I stand here accused of a crime, the most black that any human creature +is capable of perpetrating. I am innocent. I have no fear that I shall +fail to make every person in this company acknowledge my innocence. In +the mean time, what must be my feelings? Conscious as I am of deserving +approbation and not censure, of having passed my life in acts of +justice and philanthropy, can any thing be more deplorable than for me +to answer to a charge of murder? So wretched is my situation, that I +cannot accept your gratuitous acquittal, if you should be disposed to +bestow it. I must answer to an imputation, the very thought of which is +ten thousand times worse to me than death. I must exert the whole energy +of my mind, to prevent my being ranked with the vilest of men. + +"Gentlemen, this is a situation in which a man may be allowed to boast. +Accursed situation! No man need envy me the vile and polluted triumph I +am now to gain! I have called no witnesses to my character. Great God! +what sort of character is that which must be supported by witnesses? +But, if I must speak, look round the company, ask of every one present, +enquire of your own hearts! Not one word of reproach was ever whispered +against me. I do not hesitate to call upon those who have known me most, +to afford me the most honourable testimony. + +"My life has been spent in the keenest and most unintermitted +sensibility to reputation. I am almost indifferent as to what shall be +the event of this day. I would not open my mouth upon the occasion, if +my life were the only thing that was at stake. It is not in the power of +your decision to restore to me my unblemished reputation, to obliterate +the disgrace I have suffered, or to prevent it from being remembered +that I have been brought to examination upon a charge of murder. Your +decision can never have the efficacy to prevent the miserable remains of +my existence from being the most intolerable of all burthens. + +"I am accused of having committed murder upon the body of Barnabas +Tyrrel. I would most joyfully have given every farthing I possess, and +devoted myself to perpetual beggary, to have preserved his life. His +life was precious to me, beyond that of all mankind. In my opinion, the +greatest injustice committed by his unknown assassin was that of +defrauding me of my just revenge. I confess that I would have called him +out to the field, and that our encounter should not have been terminated +but by the death of one or both of us. This would have been a pitiful +and inadequate compensation for his unparalleled insult, but it was all +that remained. + +"I ask for no pity, but I must openly declare that never was any +misfortune so horrible as mine. I would willingly have taken refuge from +the recollection of that night in a voluntary death. Life was now +stripped of all those recommendations, for the sake of which it was dear +to me. But even this consolation is denied me. I am compelled to drag +for ever the intolerable load of existence, upon penalty, if at any +period, however remote, I shake it off, of having that impatience +regarded as confirming a charge of murder. Gentlemen, if by your +decision you could take away my life, without that act being connected +with my disgrace, I would bless the cord that stopped the breath of my +existence for ever. + +"You all know how easily I might have fled from this purgation. If I had +been guilty, should I not have embraced the opportunity? But, as it was, +I could not. Reputation has been the idol, the jewel of my life. I could +never have borne to think that a human creature, in the remotest part of +the globe, should believe that I was a criminal. Alas! what a deity it +is that I have chosen for my worship! I have entailed upon myself +everlasting agony and despair! + +"I have but one word to add. Gentlemen, I charge you to do me the +imperfect justice that is in your power! My life is a worthless thing. +But my honour, the empty remains of honour I have now to boast, is in +your judgment, and you will each of you, from this day, have imposed +upon yourselves the task of its vindicators. It is little that you can +do for me; but it is not less your duty to do that little. May that God +who is the fountain of honour and good prosper and protect you! The man +who now stands before you is devoted to perpetual barrenness and blast! +He has nothing to hope for beyond the feeble consolation of this day!" + +"You will easily imagine that Mr. Falkland was discharged with every +circumstance of credit. Nothing is more to be deplored in human +institutions, than that the ideas of mankind should have annexed a +sentiment of disgrace to a purgation thus satisfactory and decisive. No +one entertained the shadow of a doubt upon the subject, and yet a mere +concurrence of circumstances made it necessary that the best of men +should be publicly put on his defence, as if really under suspicion of +an atrocious crime. It may be granted indeed that Mr. Falkland had his +faults, but those very faults placed him at a still further distance +from the criminality in question. He was the fool of honour and fame: a +man whom, in the pursuit of reputation, nothing could divert; who would +have purchased the character of a true, gallant, and undaunted hero, at +the expense of worlds, and who thought every calamity nominal but a +stain upon his honour. How atrociously absurd to suppose any motive +capable of inducing such a man to play the part of a lurking assassin? +How unfeeling to oblige him to defend himself from such an imputation? +Did any man, and, least of all, a man of the purest honour, ever pass in +a moment, from a life unstained by a single act of injury, to the +consummation of human depravity? + +"When the decision of the magistrates was declared, a general murmur of +applause and involuntary transport burst forth from every one present. +It was at first low, and gradually became louder. As it was the +expression of rapturous delight, and an emotion disinterested and +divine, so there was an indescribable something in the very sound, that +carried it home to the heart, and convinced every spectator that there +was no merely personal pleasure which ever existed, that would not be +foolish and feeble in the comparison. Every one strove who should most +express his esteem of the amiable accused. Mr. Falkland was no sooner +withdrawn than the gentlemen present determined to give a still further +sanction to the business, by their congratulations. They immediately +named a deputation to wait upon him for that purpose. Every one +concurred to assist the general sentiment. It was a sort of sympathetic +feeling that took hold upon all ranks and degrees. The multitude +received him with huzzas, they took his horses from his carriage, +dragged him along in triumph, and attended him many miles on his return +to his own habitation. It seemed as if a public examination upon a +criminal charge, which had hitherto been considered in every event as a +brand of disgrace, was converted, in the present instance, into an +occasion of enthusiastic adoration and unexampled honour. + +"Nothing could reach the heart of Mr. Falkland. He was not insensible to +the general kindness and exertions; but it was too evident that the +melancholy that had taken hold of his mind was invincible. + +"It was only a few weeks after this memorable scene that the real +murderer was discovered. Every part of this story was extraordinary. The +real murderer was Hawkins. He was found with his son, under a feigned +name, at a village about thirty miles distant, in want of all the +necessaries of life. He had lived there, from the period of his flight, +in so private a manner, that all the enquiries that had been set on +foot, by the benevolence of Mr. Falkland, or the insatiable malice of +Mr. Tyrrel, had been insufficient to discover him. The first thing that +had led to the detection was a parcel of clothes covered with blood, +that were found in a ditch, and that, when drawn out, were known by the +people of the village to belong to this man. The murder of Mr. Tyrrel +was not a circumstance that could be unknown, and suspicion was +immediately roused. A diligent search being made, the rusty handle, with +part of the blade of a knife, was found thrown in a corner of his +lodging, which, being applied to a piece of the point of a knife that +had been broken in the wound, appeared exactly to correspond. Upon +further enquiry two rustics, who had been accidentally on the spot, +remembered to have seen Hawkins and his son in the town that very +evening and to have called after them, and received no answer, though +they were sure of their persons. Upon this accumulated evidence both +Hawkins and his son were tried, condemned, and afterwards executed. In +the interval between the sentence and execution Hawkins confessed his +guilt with many marks of compunction; though there are persons by whom +this is denied; but I have taken some pains to enquire into the fact, +and am persuaded that their disbelief is precipitate and groundless. + +"The cruel injustice that this man had suffered from his village-tyrant +was not forgotten upon the present occasion. It was by a strange +fatality that the barbarous proceedings of Mr. Tyrrel seemed never to +fall short of their completion; and even his death served eventually to +consummate the ruin of a man he hated; a circumstance which, if it could +have come to his knowledge, would perhaps have in some measure consoled +him for his untimely end. This poor Hawkins was surely entitled to some +pity, since his being finally urged to desperation, and brought, +together with his son, to an ignominious fate, was originally owing to +the sturdiness of his virtue and independence. But the compassion of the +public was in a great measure shut against him, as they thought it a +piece of barbarous and unpardonable selfishness, that he had not rather +come boldly forward to meet the consequences of his own conduct, than +suffer a man of so much public worth as Mr. Falkland, and who had been +so desirous of doing him good, to be exposed to the risk of being tried +for a murder that he had committed. + +"From this time to the present Mr. Falkland has been nearly such as you +at present see him. Though it be several years since these transactions, +the impression they made is for ever fresh in the mind of our +unfortunate patron. From thenceforward his habits became totally +different. He had before been fond of public scenes, and acting a part +in the midst of the people among whom he immediately resided. He now +made himself a rigid recluse. He had no associates, no friends. +Inconsolable himself, he yet wished to treat others with kindness. There +was a solemn sadness in his manner, attended with the most perfect +gentleness and humanity. Every body respects him, for his benevolence is +unalterable; but there is a stately coldness and reserve in his +behaviour, which makes it difficult for those about him to regard him +with the familiarity of affection. These symptoms are uninterrupted, +except at certain times when his sufferings become intolerable, and he +displays the marks of a furious insanity. At those times his language is +fearful and mysterious, and he seems to figure to himself by turns every +sort of persecution and alarm, which may be supposed to attend upon an +accusation of murder. But, sensible of his own weakness, he is anxious +at such times to withdraw into solitude: and his domestics in general +know nothing of him, but the uncommunicative and haughty, but mild, +dejection that accompanies every thing he does." + + +END OF THE FIRST VOLUME. + + * * * * * + + + + +VOLUME THE SECOND. + + + + +CHAPTER I. + + +I have stated the narrative of Mr. Collins, interspersed with such other +information as I was able to collect, with all the exactness that my +memory, assisted by certain memorandums I made at the time, will afford. +I do not pretend to warrant the authenticity of any part of these +memoirs, except so much as fell under my own knowledge, and that part +shall be given with the same simplicity and accuracy, that I would +observe towards a court which was to decide in the last resort upon +every thing dear to me. The same scrupulous fidelity restrains me from +altering the manner of Mr. Collins's narrative to adapt it to the +precepts of my own taste; and it will soon be perceived how essential +that narrative is to the elucidation of my history. + +The intention of my friend in this communication was to give me ease; +but he in reality added to my embarrassment. Hitherto I had had no +intercourse with the world and its passions; and, though I was not +totally unacquainted with them as they appear in books, this proved of +little service to me when I came to witness them myself. The case seemed +entirely altered, when the subject of those passions was continually +before my eyes, and the events had happened but the other day as it +were, in the very neighbourhood where I lived. There was a connection +and progress in this narrative, which made it altogether unlike the +little village incidents I had hitherto known. My feelings were +successively interested for the different persons that were brought upon +the scene. My veneration was excited for Mr. Clare, and my applause for +the intrepidity of Mrs. Hammond. I was astonished that any human +creature should be so shockingly perverted as Mr. Tyrrel. I paid the +tribute of my tears to the memory of the artless Miss Melville. I found +a thousand fresh reasons to admire and love Mr. Falkland. + +At present I was satisfied with thus considering every incident in its +obvious sense. But the story I had heard was for ever in my thoughts, +and I was peculiarly interested to comprehend its full import. I turned +it a thousand ways, and examined it in every point of view. In the +original communication it appeared sufficiently distinct and +satisfactory; but as I brooded over it, it gradually became mysterious. +There was something strange in the character of Hawkins. So firm, so +sturdily honest and just, as he appeared at first; all at once to become +a murderer! His first behaviour under the prosecution, how accurately +was it calculated to prepossess one in his favour! To be sure, if he +were guilty, it was unpardonable in him to permit a man of so much +dignity and worth as Mr. Falkland to suffer under the imputation of his +crime! And yet I could not help bitterly compassionating the honest +fellow, brought to the gallows, as he was, strictly speaking, by the +machinations of that devil incarnate, Mr. Tyrrel. His son, too, that son +for whom he voluntarily sacrificed his all, to die with him at the same +tree; surely never was a story more affecting! + +Was it possible, after all, that Mr. Falkland should be the murderer? +The reader will scarcely believe, that the idea suggested itself to my +mind that I would ask him. It was but a passing thought; but it serves +to mark the simplicity of my character. Then I recollected the virtues +of my master, almost too sublime for human nature; I thought of his +sufferings so unexampled, so unmerited; and chid myself for the +suspicion. The dying confession of Hawkins recurred to my mind; and I +felt that there was no longer a possibility of doubting. And yet what +was the meaning of all Mr. Falkland's agonies and terrors? In fine, the +idea having once occurred to my mind, it was fixed there for ever. My +thoughts fluctuated from conjecture to conjecture, but this was the +centre about which they revolved. I determined to place myself as a +watch upon my patron. + +The instant I had chosen this employment for myself, I found a strange +sort of pleasure in it. To do what is forbidden always has its charms, +because we have an indistinct apprehension of something arbitrary and +tyrannical in the prohibition. To be a spy upon Mr. Falkland! That there +was danger in the employment, served to give an alluring pungency to the +choice. I remembered the stern reprimand I had received, and his +terrible looks; and the recollection gave a kind of tingling sensation, +not altogether unallied to enjoyment. The further I advanced, the more +the sensation was irresistible. I seemed to myself perpetually upon the +brink of being countermined, and perpetually roused to guard my designs. +The more impenetrable Mr. Falkland was determined to be, the more +uncontrollable was my curiosity. Through the whole, my alarm and +apprehension of personal danger had a large mixture of frankness and +simplicity, conscious of meaning no ill, that made me continually ready +to say every thing that was upon my mind, and would not suffer me to +believe that, when things were brought to the test, any one could be +seriously angry with me. + +These reflections led gradually to a new state of my mind. When I had +first removed into Mr. Falkland's family, the novelty of the scene +rendered me cautious and reserved. The distant and solemn manners of my +master seemed to have annihilated my constitutional gaiety. But the +novelty by degrees wore off, and my constraint in the same degree +diminished. The story I had now heard, and the curiosity it excited, +restored to me activity, eagerness, and courage. I had always had a +propensity to communicate my thoughts; my age was, of course, inclined +to talkativeness; and I ventured occasionally in a sort of hesitating +way, as if questioning whether such a conduct might be allowed, to +express my sentiments as they arose, in the presence of Mr. Falkland. + +The first time I did so, he looked at me with an air of surprise, made +me no answer, and presently took occasion to leave me. The experiment +was soon after repeated. My master seemed half inclined to encourage me, +and yet doubtful whether he might venture. + +He had long been a stranger to pleasure of every sort, and my artless +and untaught remarks appeared to promise him some amusement. Could an +amusement of this sort be dangerous? + +In this uncertainty he could not probably find it in his heart to treat +with severity my innocent effusions. I needed but little encouragement; +for the perturbation of my mind stood in want of this relief. My +simplicity, arising from my being a total stranger to the intercourse of +the world, was accompanied with a mind in some degree cultivated with +reading, and perhaps not altogether destitute of observation and talent. +My remarks were therefore perpetually unexpected, at one time implying +extreme ignorance, and at another some portion of acuteness, but at all +times having an air of innocence, frankness, and courage. There was +still an apparent want of design in the manner, even after I was excited +accurately to compare my observations, and study the inferences to which +they led; for the effect of old habit was more visible than that of a +recently conceived purpose which was yet scarcely mature. + +Mr. Falkland's situation was like that of a fish that plays with the +bait employed to entrap him. By my manner he was in a certain degree +encouraged to lay aside his usual reserve, and relax his stateliness; +till some abrupt observation or interrogatory stung him into +recollection, and brought back his alarm. Still it was evident that he +bore about him a secret wound. Whenever the cause of his sorrows was +touched, though in a manner the most indirect and remote, his +countenance altered, his distemper returned, and it was with difficulty +that he could suppress his emotions, sometimes conquering himself with +painful effort, and sometimes bursting into a sort of paroxysm of +insanity, and hastening to bury himself in solitude. + +These appearances I too frequently interpreted into grounds of +suspicion, though I might with equal probability and more liberality +have ascribed them to the cruel mortifications he had encountered in the +objects of his darling ambition. Mr. Collins had strongly urged me to +secrecy; and Mr. Falkland, whenever my gesture or his consciousness +impressed him with the idea of my knowing more than I expressed, looked +at me with wistful earnestness, as questioning what was the degree of +information I possessed, and how it was obtained. But again at our next +interview the simple vivacity of my manner restored his tranquillity, +obliterated the emotion of which I had been the cause, and placed +things afresh in their former situation. + +The longer this humble familiarity on my part had continued, the more +effort it would require to suppress it; and Mr. Falkland was neither +willing to mortify me by a severe prohibition of speech, nor even +perhaps to make me of so much consequence, as that prohibition might +seem to imply. Though I was curious, it must not be supposed that I had +the object of my enquiry for ever in my mind, or that my questions and +innuendoes were perpetually regulated with the cunning of a grey-headed +inquisitor. The secret wound of Mr. Falkland's mind was much more +uniformly present to his recollection than to mine; and a thousand times +he applied the remarks that occurred in conversation; when I had not the +remotest idea of such an application, till some singularity in his +manner brought it back to my thoughts. The consciousness of this morbid +sensibility, and the imagination that its influence might perhaps +constitute the whole of the case, served probably to spur Mr. Falkland +again to the charge, and connect a sentiment of shame, with every +project that suggested itself for interrupting the freedom of our +intercourse. + +I will give a specimen of the conversations to which I allude; and, as +it shall be selected from those which began upon topics the most general +and remote, the reader will easily imagine the disturbance that was +almost daily endured by a mind so tremblingly alive as that of my +patron. + +"Pray, sir," said I, one day as I was assisting Mr. Falkland in +arranging some papers, previously to their being transcribed into his +collection, "how came Alexander of Macedon to be surnamed the Great?" + +"How came it? Did you never read his history?" + +"Yes, sir." + +"Well, Williams, and could you find no reasons there?" + +"Why, I do not know, sir. I could find reasons why he should be so +famous; but every man that is talked of is not admired. Judges differ +about the merits of Alexander. Doctor Prideaux says in his Connection, +that he deserves only to be called the Great Cut-throat; and the author +of Tom Jones has written a volume, to prove that he and all other +conquerors ought to be classed with Jonathan Wild." + +Mr. Falkland reddened at these citations. + +"Accursed blasphemy! Did these authors think that, by the coarseness of +their ribaldry, they could destroy his well-earned fame? Are learning, +sensibility, and taste, no securities to exempt their possessor from +this vulgar abuse? Did you ever read, Williams, of a man more gallant, +generous, and free? Was ever mortal so completely the reverse of every +thing engrossing and selfish? He formed to himself a sublime image of +excellence, and his only ambition was to realise it in his own story. +Remember his giving away every thing when he set out upon his grand +expedition, professedly reserving for himself nothing but hope. +Recollect his heroic confidence in Philip the physician, and his entire +and unalterable friendship for Ephestion. He treated the captive family +of Darius with the most cordial urbanity, and the venerable Sysigambis +with all the tenderness and attention of a son to his mother. Never take +the judgment, Williams, upon such a subject, of a clerical pedant or a +Westminster justice. Examine for yourself, and you will find in +Alexander a model of honour, generosity, and disinterestedness,--a man +who, for the cultivated liberality of his mind, and the unparalleled +grandeur of his projects, must stand alone the spectacle and admiration +of all ages of the world." + +"Ah, sir! it is a fine thing for us to sit here and compose his +panegyric. But shall I forget what a vast expense was bestowed in +erecting the monument of his fame? Was not he the common disturber of +mankind? Did not he over-run nations that would never have heard of him +but for his devastations? How many hundred thousands of lives did he +sacrifice in his career? What must I think of his cruelties; a whole +tribe massacred for a crime committed by their ancestors one hundred and +fifty years before; fifty thousand sold into slavery; two thousand +crucified for their gallant defence of their country? Man is surely a +strange sort of creature, who never praises any one more heartily than +him who has spread destruction and ruin over the face of nations!" + +"The way of thinking you express, Williams, is natural enough, and I +cannot blame you for it. But let me hope that you will become more +liberal. The death of a hundred thousand men is at first sight very +shocking; but what in reality are a hundred thousand such men, more than +a hundred thousand sheep? It is mind, Williams, the generation of +knowledge and virtue, that we ought to love. This was the project of +Alexander; he set out in a great undertaking to civilise mankind; he +delivered the vast continent of Asia from the stupidity and degradation +of the Persian monarchy: and, though he was cut off in the midst of his +career, we may easily perceive the vast effects of his project. Grecian +literature and cultivation, the Seleucidae, the Antiochuses, and the +Ptolemies followed, in nations which before had been sunk to the +condition of brutes. Alexander was the builder, as notoriously as the +destroyer, of cities." + +"And yet, sir, I am afraid that the pike and the battle-axe are not the +right instruments for making men wise. Suppose it were admitted that +the lives of men were to be sacrificed without remorse if a paramount +good were to result, it seems to me as if murder and massacre were but a +very left-handed way of producing civilisation and love. But pray, do +not you think this great hero was a sort of a madman? What now will you +say to his firing the palace of Persepolis, his weeping for other worlds +to conquer, and his marching his whole army over the burning sands of +Libya, merely to visit a temple, and persuade mankind that he was the +son of Jupiter Ammon?" + +"Alexander, my boy, has been much misunderstood. Mankind have revenged +themselves upon him by misrepresentation, for having so far eclipsed the +rest of his species. It was necessary to the realising his project, that +he should pass for a god. It was the only way by which he could get a +firm hold upon the veneration of the stupid and bigoted Persians. It was +this, and not a mad vanity, that was the source of his proceeding. And +how much had he to struggle with in this respect, in the unapprehending +obstinacy of some of his Macedonians?" + +"Why then, sir, at last Alexander did but employ means that all +politicians profess to use, as well as he. He dragooned men into wisdom, +and cheated them into the pursuit of their own happiness. But what is +worse, sir, this Alexander, in the paroxysm of his headlong rage, spared +neither friend nor foe. You will not pretend to justify the excesses of +his ungovernable passion. It is impossible, sure, that a word can be +said for a man whom a momentary provocation can hurry into the +commission of murders--" + +The instant I had uttered these words, I felt what it was that I had +done. There was a magnetical sympathy between me and my patron, so that +their effect was not sooner produced upon him, than my own mind +reproached me with the inhumanity of the allusion. Our confusion was +mutual. The blood forsook at once the transparent complexion of Mr. +Falkland, and then rushed back again with rapidity and fierceness. I +dared not utter a word, lest I should commit a new error, worse than +that into which I had just fallen. After a short, but severe, struggle +to continue the conversation, Mr. Falkland began with trepidation, but +afterwards became calmer:-- + +"You are not candid--Alexander--You must learn more clemency--Alexander, +I say, does not deserve this rigour. Do you remember his tears, his +remorse, his determined abstinence from food, which he could scarcely be +persuaded to relinquish? Did not that prove acute feeling and a rooted +principle of equity?--Well, well, Alexander was a true and judicious +lover of mankind, and his real merits have been little comprehended." + +I know not how to make the state of my mind at that moment accurately +understood. When one idea has got possession of the soul, it is scarcely +possible to keep it from finding its way to the lips. Error, once +committed, has a fascinating power, like that ascribed to the eyes of +the rattlesnake, to draw us into a second error. It deprives us of that +proud confidence in our own strength, to which we are indebted for so +much of our virtue. Curiosity is a restless propensity, and often does +but hurry us forward the more irresistibly, the greater is the danger +that attends its indulgence. + +"Clitus," said I, "was a man of very coarse and provoking manners, was +he not?" + +Mr. Falkland felt the full force of this appeal. He gave me a +penetrating look, as if he would see my very soul. His eyes were then in +an instant withdrawn. I could perceive him seized with a convulsive +shuddering which, though strongly counteracted, and therefore scarcely +visible, had I know not what of terrible in it. He left his employment, +strode about the room in anger, his visage gradually assumed an +expression as of supernatural barbarity, he quitted the apartment +abruptly, and flung the door with a violence that seemed to shake the +house. + +"Is this," said I, "the fruit of conscious guilt, or of the disgust that +a man of honour conceives at guilt undeservedly imputed?" + + + + +CHAPTER II. + + +The reader will feel how rapidly I was advancing to the brink of the +precipice. I had a confused apprehension of what I was doing, but I +could not stop myself. "Is it possible," said I, "that Mr. Falkland, who +is thus overwhelmed with a sense of the unmerited dishonour that has +been fastened upon him in the face of the world, will long endure the +presence of a raw and unfriended youth, who is perpetually bringing back +that dishonour to his recollection, and who seems himself the most +forward to entertain the accusation?" + +I felt indeed that Mr. Falkland would not hastily incline to dismiss me, +for the same reason that restrained him from many other actions, which +might seem to savour of a too tender and ambiguous sensibility. But this +reflection was little adapted to comfort me. That he should cherish in +his heart a growing hatred against me, and that he should think himself +obliged to retain me a continual thorn in his side, was an idea by no +means of favourable augury to my future peace. + +It was some time after this that, in clearing out a case of drawers, I +found a paper that, by some accident, had slipped behind one of the +drawers, and been overlooked. At another time perhaps my curiosity might +have given way to the laws of decorum, and I should have restored it +unopened to my master, its owner. But my eagerness for information had +been too much stimulated by the preceding incidents, to allow me at +present to neglect any occasion of obtaining it. The paper proved to be +a letter written by the elder Hawkins, and from its contents seemed to +have been penned when he had first been upon the point of absconding +from the persecutions of Mr. Tyrrel. It was as follows:-- + +"Honourable Sir, + +"I have waited some time in daily hope of your honour's return into +these parts. Old Warnes and his dame, who are left to take care of your +house, tell me they cannot say when that will be, nor justly in what +part of England you are at present. For my share, misfortune comes so +thick upon me, that I must determine upon something (that is for +certain), and out of hand. Our squire, who I must own at first used me +kindly enough, though I am afraid that was partly out of spite to squire +Underwood, has since determined to be the ruin of me. Sir, I have been +no craven; I fought it up stoutly; for after all, you know, God bless +your honour! it is but a man to a man; but he has been too much for me. + +"Perhaps if I were to ride over to the market-town and enquire of +Munsle, your lawyer, he could tell me how to direct to you. But having +hoped and waited o' this fashion, and all in vain, has put me upon other +thoughts. I was in no hurry, sir, to apply to you; for I do not love to +be a trouble to any body. I kept that for my last stake. Well, sir, and +now that has failed me like, I am ashamed, as it were, to have thought +of it. Have not I, thinks I, arms and legs as well as other people? I am +driven out of house and home. Well, and what then? Sure I arn't a +cabbage, that if you pull it out of the ground it must die. I am +pennyless. True; and how many hundreds are there that live from hand to +mouth all the days of their life? (Begging your honour's pardon) thinks +I, if we little folks had but the wit to do for ourselves, the great +folks would not be such maggotty changelings as they are. They would +begin to look about them. + +"But there is another thing that has swayed with me more than all the +rest. I do not know how to tell you, sir,--My poor boy, my Leonard, the +pride of my life, has been three weeks in the county jail. It is true +indeed, sir. Squire Tyrrel put him there. Now, sir, every time that I +lay my head upon my pillow under my own little roof, my heart smites me +with the situation of my Leonard. I do not mean so much for the +hardship; I do not so much matter that. I do not expect him to go +through the world upon velvet! I am not such a fool. But who can tell +what may hap in a jail! I have been three times to see him; and there is +one man in the same quarter of the prison that looks so wicked! I do not +much fancy the looks of the rest. To be sure, Leonard is as good a lad +as ever lived. I think he will not give his mind to such. But come what +will, I am determined he shall not stay among them twelve hours longer. +I am an obstinate old fool perhaps; but I have taken it into my head, +and I will do it. Do not ask me what. But, if I were to write to your +honour, and wait for your answer, it might take a week or ten days more. +I must not think of it! + +"Squire Tyrrel is very headstrong, and you, your honour, might be a +little hottish, or so. No, I would not have any body quarrel for me. +There has been mischief enough done already; and I will get myself out +of the way. So I write this, your honour, merely to unload my mind. I +feel myself equally as much bound to respect and love you, as if you had +done every thing for me, that I believe you would have done if things +had chanced differently. It is most likely you will never hear of me any +more. If it should be so, set your worthy heart at rest. I know myself +too well, ever to be tempted to do any thing that is really bad. I have +now my fortune to seek in the world. I have been used ill enough, God +knows. But I bear no malice; my heart is at peace with all mankind; and +I forgive every body. It is like enough that poor Leonard and I may have +hardship enough to undergo, among strangers, and being obliged to hide +ourselves like housebreakers or highwaymen. But I defy all the malice of +fortune to make us do an ill thing. That consolation we will always keep +against all the crosses of a heart-breaking world. + + "God bless you! + So prays, + Your honour's humble servant to command, + BENJAMIN HAWKINS." + +I read this letter with considerable attention, and it occasioned me +many reflections. To my way of thinking it contained a very interesting +picture of a blunt, downright, honest mind. "It is a melancholy +consideration," said I to myself; "but such is man! To have judged from +appearances one would have said, this is a fellow to have taken +fortune's buffets and rewards with an incorruptible mind. And yet see +where it all ends! This man was capable of afterwards becoming a +murderer, and finished his life at the gallows. O poverty! thou art +indeed omnipotent! Thou grindest us into desperation; thou confoundest +all our boasted and most deep-rooted principles; thou fillest us to the +very brim with malice and revenge, and renderest us capable of acts of +unknown horror! May I never be visited by thee in the fulness of thy +power!" + +Having satisfied my curiosity with respect to this paper, I took care to +dispose of it in such a manner as that it should be found by Mr. +Falkland; at the same time that, in obedience to the principle which at +present governed me with absolute dominion, I was willing that the way +in which it offered itself to his attention should suggest to him the +idea that it had possibly passed through my hands. The next morning I +saw him, and I exerted myself to lead the conversation, which by this +time I well knew how to introduce, by insensible degrees to the point I +desired. After several previous questions, remarks, and rejoinders, I +continued:-- + +"Well, sir, after all, I cannot help feeling very uncomfortably as to my +ideas of human nature, when I find that there is no dependence to be +placed upon its perseverance, and that, at least among the illiterate, +the most promising appearances may end in the foulest disgrace." + +"You think, then, that literature and a cultivated mind are the only +assurance for the constancy of our principles!" + +"Humph!--why do you suppose, sir, that learning and ingenuity do not +often serve people rather to hide their crimes than to restrain them +from committing them? History tells us strange things in that respect." + +"Williams," said Mr. Falkland, a little disturbed, "you are extremely +given to censure and severity." + +"I hope not. I am sure I am most fond of looking on the other side of +the picture, and considering how many men have been aspersed, and even +at some time or other almost torn to pieces by their fellow-creatures, +whom, when properly understood, we find worthy of our reverence and +love." + +"Indeed," replied Mr. Falkland, with a sigh, "when I consider these +things I do not wonder at the dying exclamation of Brutus, 'O Virtue, I +sought thee as a substance, but I find thee an empty name!' I am too +much inclined to be of his opinion." + +"Why, to be sure, sir, innocence and guilt are too much confounded in +human life. I remember an affecting story of a poor man in the reign of +Queen Elizabeth, who would have infallibly been hanged for murder upon +the strength of circumstantial evidence, if the person really concerned +had not been himself upon the jury and prevented it." + +In saying this I touched the spring that wakened madness in his mind. He +came up to me with a ferocious countenance, as if determined to force me +into a confession of my thoughts. A sudden pang however seemed to change +his design! he drew back with trepidation, and exclaimed, "Detested be +the universe, and the laws that govern it! Honour, justice, virtue, are +all the juggle of knaves! If it were in my power I would instantly crush +the whole system into nothing!" + +I replied; "Oh, sir! things are not so bad as you imagine. The world was +made for men of sense to do what they will with. Its affairs cannot be +better than in the direction of the genuine heroes; and as in the end +they will be found the truest friends of the whole, so the multitude +have nothing to do but to look on, be fashioned, and admire." + +Mr. Falkland made a powerful effort to recover his tranquillity. +"Williams," said he, "you instruct me well. You have a right notion of +things, and I have great hopes of you. I will be more of a man; I will +forget the past, and do better for the time to come. The future, the +future is always our own." + +"I am sorry, sir, that I have given you pain. I am afraid to say all +that I think. But it is my opinion that mistakes will ultimately be +cleared up, justice done, and the true state of things come to light, in +spite of the false colours that may for a time obscure it." + +The idea I suggested did not give Mr. Falkland the proper degree of +delight. He suffered a temporary relapse. "Justice!"--he muttered. "I do +not know what is justice. My case is not within the reach of common +remedies; perhaps of none. I only know that I am miserable. I began life +with the best intentions and the most fervid philanthropy; and here I +am--miserable--miserable beyond expression or endurance." + +Having said this, he seemed suddenly to recollect himself, and +re-assumed his accustomed dignity and command. "How came this +conversation?" cried he. "Who gave you a right to be my confidant? Base, +artful wretch that you are! learn to be more respectful! Are my passions +to be wound and unwound by an insolent domestic? Do you think I will be +an instrument to be played on at your pleasure, till you have extorted +all the treasures of my soul? Begone, and fear lest you be made to pay +for the temerity you have already committed!" + +There was an energy and determination in the gestures with which these +words were accompanied, that did not admit of their being disputed. My +mouth was closed; I felt as if deprived of all share of activity, and +was only able silently and passively to quit the apartment. + + + + +CHAPTER III. + + +Two days subsequent to this conversation, Mr. Falkland ordered me to be +called to him. [I shall continue to speak in my narrative of the silent, +as well as the articulate part of the intercourse between us. His +countenance was habitually animated and expressive, much beyond that of +any other man I have seen. The curiosity which, as I have said, +constituted my ruling passion, stimulated me to make it my perpetual +study. It will also most probably happen, while I am thus employed in +collecting the scattered incidents of my history, that I shall upon some +occasions annex to appearances an explanation which I was far from +possessing at the time, and was only suggested to me through the medium +of subsequent events.] + +When I entered the apartment, I remarked in Mr. Falkland's countenance +an unwonted composure. This composure however did not seem to result +from internal ease, but from an effort which, while he prepared himself +for an interesting scene, was exerted to prevent his presence of mind, +and power of voluntary action, from suffering any diminution. + +"Williams," said he, "I am determined, whatever it may cost me, to have +an explanation with you. You are a rash and inconsiderate boy, and have +given me much disturbance. You ought to have known that, though I allow +you to talk with me upon indifferent subjects, it is very improper in +you to lead the conversation to any thing that relates to my personal +concerns. You have said many things lately in a very mysterious way, and +appear to know something more than I am aware of. I am equally at a loss +to guess how you came by your knowledge, as of what it consists. But I +think I perceive too much inclination on your part to trifle with my +peace of mind. That ought not to be, nor have I deserved any such +treatment from you. But, be that as it will, the guesses in which you +oblige me to employ myself are too painful. It is a sort of sporting +with my feelings, which, as a man of resolution, I am determined to +bring to an end. I expect you therefore to lay aside all mystery and +equivocation, and inform me explicitly what it is upon which your +allusions are built. What is it you know? What is it you want? I have +been too much exposed already to unparalleled mortification and +hardship, and my wounds will not bear this perpetual tampering." + +"I feel, sir," answered I, "how wrong I have been, and am ashamed that +such a one as I should have given you all this trouble and displeasure. +I felt it at the time; but I have been hurried along, I do not know how. +I have always tried to stop myself, but the demon that possessed me was +too strong for me. I know nothing, sir, but what Mr. Collins told me. He +told me the story of Mr. Tyrrel and Miss Melville and Hawkins. I am +sure, sir, he said nothing but what was to your honour, and proved you +to be more an angel than a man." + +"Well, sir: I found a letter written by that Hawkins the other day; did +not that letter fall into your hands? Did not you read it?" + +"For God's sake, sir, turn me out of your house. Punish me in some way +or other, that I may forgive myself. I am a foolish, wicked, despicable +wretch. I confess, sir, I did read the letter." + +"And how dared you read it? It was indeed very wrong of you. But we will +talk of that by and by. Well, and what did you say to the letter? You +know it seems, that Hawkins was hanged." + +"I say, sir? why it went to my heart to read it. I say, as I said the +day before yesterday, that when I see a man of so much principle +afterwards deliberately proceeding to the very worst of crimes, I can +scarcely bear to think of it." + +"That is what you say? It seems too you know--accursed +remembrance!--that I was accused of this crime?" + +I was silent. + +"Well, sir. You know too, perhaps, that from the hour the crime was +committed--yes, sir, that was the date [and as he said this, there was +somewhat frightful, I had almost said diabolical, in his countenance]--I +have not had an hour's peace; I became changed from the happiest to the +most miserable thing that lives; sleep has fled from my eyes; joy has +been a stranger to my thoughts; and annihilation I should prefer a +thousand times to the being that I am. As soon as I was capable of a +choice, I chose honour and the esteem of mankind as a good I preferred +to all others. You know, it seems, in how many ways my ambition has been +disappointed,--I do not thank Collins for having been the historian of +my disgrace,--would to God that night could be blotted from the memory +of man!--But the scene of that night, instead of perishing, has been a +source of ever new calamity to me, which must flow for ever! Am I then, +thus miserable and ruined, a proper subject upon which for you to +exercise your ingenuity, and improve your power of tormenting? Was it +not enough that I was publicly dishonoured? that I was deprived, by the +pestilential influence of some demon, of the opportunity of avenging my +dishonour? No: in addition to this, I have been charged with having in +this critical moment intercepted my own vengeance by the foulest of +crimes. That trial is past. Misery itself has nothing worse in store for +me, except what you have inflicted: the seeming to doubt of my +innocence, which, after the fullest and most solemn examination, has +been completely established. You have forced me to this explanation. You +have extorted from me a confidence which I had no inclination to make. +But it is a part of the misery of my situation, that I am at the mercy +of every creature, however little, who feels himself inclined to sport +with my distress. Be content. You have brought me low enough." + +"Oh, sir, I am not content; I cannot be content! I cannot bear to think +what I have done. I shall never again be able to look in the face of the +best of masters and the best of men. I beg of you, sir, to turn me out +of your service. Let me go and hide myself where I may never see you +more." + +Mr. Falkland's countenance had indicated great severity through the +whole of this conversation; but now it became more harsh and tempestuous +than ever. "How now, rascal!" cried he. "You want to leave me, do you? +Who told you that I wished to part with you? But you cannot bear to live +with such a miserable wretch as I am! You are not disposed to put up +with the caprices of a man so dissatisfied and unjust!" + +"Oh, sir! do not talk to me thus! Do with me any thing you will. Kill me +if you please." + +"Kill you!" [Volumes could not describe the emotions with which this +echo of my words was given and received.] + +"Sir, I could die to serve you! I love you more than I can express. I +worship you as a being of a superior nature. I am foolish, raw, +inexperienced,--worse than any of these;--but never did a thought of +disloyalty to your service enter into my heart." + +Here our conversation ended; and the impression it made upon my youthful +mind it is impossible to describe. I thought with astonishment, even +with rapture, of the attention and kindness towards me I discovered in +Mr. Falkland, through all the roughness of his manner. I could never +enough wonder at finding myself, humble as I was by my birth, obscure as +I had hitherto been, thus suddenly become of so much importance to the +happiness of one of the most enlightened and accomplished men in +England. But this consciousness attached me to my patron more eagerly +than ever, and made me swear a thousand times, as I meditated upon my +situation, that I would never prove unworthy of so generous a protector. + + + + +CHAPTER IV. + + +Is it not unaccountable that, in the midst of all my increased +veneration for my patron, the first tumult of my emotion was scarcely +subsided, before the old question that had excited my conjectures +recurred to my mind, Was he the murderer? It was a kind of fatal +impulse, that seemed destined to hurry me to my destruction. I did not +wonder at the disturbance that was given to Mr. Falkland by any +allusion, however distant, to this fatal affair. That was as completely +accounted for from the consideration of his excessive sensibility in +matters of honour, as it would have been upon the supposition of the +most atrocious guilt. Knowing, as he did, that such a charge had once +been connected with his name, he would of course be perpetually uneasy, +and suspect some latent insinuation at every possible opportunity. He +would doubt and fear, lest every man with whom he conversed harboured +the foulest suspicion against him. In my case he found that I was in +possession of some information, more than he was aware of, without its +being possible for him to decide to what it amounted, whether I had +heard a just or unjust, a candid or calumniatory tale. He had also +reason to suppose that I gave entertainment to thoughts derogatory to +his honour, and that I did not form that favourable judgment, which the +exquisite refinement of his ruling passion made indispensable to his +peace. All these considerations would of course maintain in him a state +of perpetual uneasiness. But, though I could find nothing that I could +consider as justifying me in persisting in the shadow of a doubt, yet, +as I have said, the uncertainty and restlessness of my contemplations +would by no means depart from me. + +The fluctuating state of my mind produced a contention of opposite +principles, that by turns usurped dominion over my conduct. Sometimes I +was influenced by the most complete veneration for my master; I placed +an unreserved confidence in his integrity and his virtue, and implicitly +surrendered my understanding for him to set it to what point he pleased. +At other times the confidence, which had before flowed with the most +plenteous tide, began to ebb; I was, as I had already been, watchful, +inquisitive, suspicious, full of a thousand conjectures as to the +meaning of the most indifferent actions. Mr. Falkland, who was most +painfully alive to every thing that related to his honour, saw these +variations, and betrayed his consciousness of them now in one manner, +and now in another, frequently before I was myself aware, sometimes +almost before they existed. The situation of both was distressing; we +were each of us a plague to the other; and I often wondered, that the +forbearance and benignity of my master was not at length exhausted, and +that he did not determine to thrust from him for ever so incessant an +observer. There was indeed one eminent difference between his share in +the transaction and mine. I had some consolation in the midst of my +restlessness. Curiosity is a principle that carries its pleasures, as +well as its pains, along with it. The mind is urged by a perpetual +stimulus; it seems as if it were continually approaching to the end of +its race; and as the insatiable desire of satisfaction is its principle +of conduct, so it promises itself in that satisfaction an unknown +gratification, which seems as if it were capable of fully compensating +any injuries that may be suffered in the career. But to Mr. Falkland +there was no consolation. What he endured in the intercourse between us +appeared to be gratuitous evil. He had only to wish that there was no +such person as myself in the world, and to curse the hour when his +humanity led him to rescue me from my obscurity, and place me in his +service. + +A consequence produced upon me by the extraordinary nature of my +situation it is necessary to mention. The constant state of vigilance +and suspicion in which my mind was retained, worked a very rapid change +in my character. It seemed to have all the effect that might have been +expected from years of observation and experience. The strictness with +which I endeavoured to remark what passed in the mind of one man, and +the variety of conjectures into which I was led, appeared, as it were, +to render me a competent adept in the different modes in which the +human intellect displays its secret workings. I no longer said to +myself, as I had done in the beginning, "I will ask Mr. Falkland whether +he were the murderer." On the contrary, after having carefully examined +the different kinds of evidence of which the subject was susceptible, +and recollecting all that had already passed upon the subject, it was +not without considerable pain, that I felt myself unable to discover any +way in which I could be perfectly and unalterably satisfied of my +patron's innocence. As to his guilt, I could scarcely bring myself to +doubt that in some way or other, sooner or later, I should arrive at the +knowledge of that, if it really existed. But I could not endure to +think, almost for a moment, of that side of the alternative as true; and +with all my ungovernable suspicion arising from the mysteriousness of +the circumstances, and all the delight which a young and unfledged mind +receives from ideas that give scope to all that imagination can picture +of terrible or sublime, I could not yet bring myself to consider Mr. +Falkland's guilt as a supposition attended with the remotest +probability. + +I hope the reader will forgive me for dwelling thus long on preliminary +circumstances. I shall come soon enough to the story of my own misery. I +have already said, that one of the motives which induced me to the +penning of this narrative, was to console myself in my insupportable +distress. I derive a melancholy pleasure from dwelling upon the +circumstances which imperceptibly paved the way to my ruin. While I +recollect or describe past scenes, which occurred in a more favourable +period of my life, my attention is called off for a short interval, from +the hopeless misfortune in which I am at present involved. The man must +indeed possess an uncommon portion of hardness of heart, who can envy +me so slight a relief.--To proceed. + +For some time after the explanation which had thus taken place between +me and Mr. Falkland, his melancholy, instead of being in the slightest +degree diminished by the lenient hand of time, went on perpetually to +increase. His fits of insanity--for such I must denominate them for want +of a distinct appellation, though it is possible they might not fall +under the definition that either the faculty or the court of chancery +appropriate to the term--became stronger and more durable than ever. It +was no longer practicable wholly to conceal them from the family, and +even from the neighbourhood. He would sometimes, without any previous +notice, absent himself from his house for two or three days, +unaccompanied by servant or attendant. This was the more extraordinary, +as it was well known that he paid no visits, nor kept up any sort of +intercourse with the gentlemen of the vicinity. But it was impossible +that a man of Mr. Falkland's distinction and fortune should long +continue in such a practice, without its being discovered what was +become of him; though a considerable part of our county was among the +wildest and most desolate districts that are to be found in South +Britain. Mr. Falkland was sometimes seen climbing among the rocks, +reclining motionless for hours together upon the edge of a precipice, or +lulled into a kind of nameless lethargy of despair by the dashing of the +torrents. He would remain for whole nights together under the naked cope +of heaven, inattentive to the consideration either of place or time; +insensible to the variations of the weather, or rather seeming to be +delighted with that uproar of the elements, which partially called off +his attention from the discord and dejection that occupied his own mind. + +At first, when we received intelligence at any time of the place to +which Mr. Falkland had withdrawn himself, some person of his household, +Mr. Collins or myself, but most generally myself, as I was always at +home, and always, in the received sense of the word, at leisure, went to +him to persuade him to return. But, after a few experiments, we thought +it advisable to desist, and leave him to prolong his absence, or to +terminate it, as might happen to suit his own inclination. Mr. Collins, +whose grey hairs and long services seemed to give him a sort of right to +be importunate, sometimes succeeded; though even in that case there was +nothing that could sit more uneasily upon Mr. Falkland than this +insinuation as if he wanted a guardian to take care of him, or as if he +were in, or in danger of falling into, a state in which he would be +incapable of deliberately controlling his own words and actions. At one +time he would suddenly yield to his humble, venerable friend, murmuring +grievously at the constraint that was put upon him, but without spirit +enough even to complain of it with energy. At another time, even though +complying, he would suddenly burst out in a paroxysm of resentment. Upon +these occasions there was something inconceivably, savagely terrible in +his anger, that gave to the person against whom it was directed the most +humiliating and insupportable sensations. Me he always treated, at these +times, with fierceness, and drove me from him with a vehemence lofty, +emphatical, and sustained, beyond any thing of which I should have +thought human nature to be capable. These sallies seemed always to +constitute a sort of crisis in his indisposition; and, whenever he was +induced to such a premature return, he would fall immediately after into +a state of the most melancholy inactivity, in which he usually continued +for two or three days. It was by an obstinate fatality that, whenever I +saw Mr. Falkland in these deplorable situations, and particularly when I +lighted upon him after having sought him among the rocks and precipices, +pale, emaciated, solitary, and haggard, the suggestion would continually +recur to me, in spite of inclination, in spite of persuasion, and in +spite of evidence, Surely this man is a murderer! + + + + +CHAPTER V. + + +It was in one of the lucid intervals, as I may term them, that occurred +during this period, that a peasant was brought before him, in his +character of a justice of peace, upon an accusation of having murdered +his fellow. As Mr. Falkland had by this time acquired the repute of a +melancholy valetudinarian, it is probable he would not have been called +upon to act in his official character upon the present occasion, had it +not been that two or three of the neighbouring justices were all of them +from home at once, so that he was the only one to be found in a circuit +of many miles. The reader however must not imagine, though I have +employed the word insanity in describing Mr. Falkland's symptoms, that +he was by any means reckoned for a madman by the generality of those who +had occasion to observe him. It is true that his behaviour, at certain +times, was singular and unaccountable; but then, at other times, there +was in it so much dignity, regularity, and economy; he knew so well how +to command and make himself respected; his actions and carriage were so +condescending, considerate, and benevolent, that, far from having +forfeited the esteem of the unfortunate or the many, they were loud and +earnest in his praises. + +I was present at the examination of this peasant. The moment I heard of +the errand which had brought this rabble of visitors, a sudden thought +struck me. I conceived the possibility of rendering the incident +subordinate to the great enquiry which drank up all the currents of my +soul. I said, this man is arraigned of murder, and murder is the +master-key that wakes distemper in the mind of Mr. Falkland. I will +watch him without remission. I will trace all the mazes of his thought. +Surely at such a time his secret anguish must betray itself. Surely, if +it be not my own fault, I shall now be able to discover the state of his +plea before the tribunal of unerring justice. + +I took my station in a manner most favourable to the object upon which +my mind was intent. I could perceive in Mr. Falkland's features, as he +entered, a strong reluctance to the business in which he was engaged; +but there was no possibility of retreating. His countenance was +embarrassed and anxious; he scarcely saw any body. The examination had +not proceeded far, before he chanced to turn his eye to the part of the +room where I was. It happened in this as in some preceding instances--we +exchanged a silent look, by which we told volumes to each other. Mr. +Falkland's complexion turned from red to pale, and from pale to red. I +perfectly understood his feelings, and would willingly have withdrawn +myself. But it was impossible; my passions were too deeply engaged; I +was rooted to the spot; though my own life, that of my master, or almost +of a whole nation had been at stake, I had no power to change my +position. + +The first surprise however having subsided, Mr. Falkland assumed a look +of determined constancy, and even seemed to increase in self-possession +much beyond what could have been expected from his first entrance. This +he could probably have maintained, had it not been that the scene, +instead of being permanent, was in some sort perpetually changing. The +man who was brought before him was vehemently accused by the brother of +the deceased as having acted from the most rooted malice. He swore that +there had been an old grudge between the parties, and related several +instances of it. He affirmed that the murderer had sought the earliest +opportunity of wreaking his revenge; had struck the first blow; and, +though the contest was in appearance only a common boxing match, had +watched the occasion of giving a fatal stroke, which was followed by the +instant death of his antagonist. + +While the accuser was giving in his evidence, the accused discovered +every token of the most poignant sensibility. At one time his features +were convulsed with anguish; tears unbidden trickled down his manly +cheeks; and at another he started with apparent astonishment at the +unfavourable turn that was given to the narrative, though without +betraying any impatience to interrupt. I never saw a man less ferocious +in his appearance. He was tall, well made, and comely. His countenance +was ingenuous and benevolent, without folly. By his side stood a young +woman, his sweetheart, extremely agreeable in her person, and her looks +testifying how deeply she interested herself in the fate of her lover. +The accidental spectators were divided, between indignation against the +enormity of the supposed criminal, and compassion for the poor girl that +accompanied him. They seemed to take little notice of the favourable +appearances visible in the person of the accused, till, in the sequel, +those appearances were more forcibly suggested to their attention. For +Mr. Falkland, he was at one moment engrossed by curiosity and +earnestness to investigate the tale, while at another he betrayed a sort +of revulsion of sentiment, which made the investigation too painful for +him to support. + +When the accused was called upon for his defence, he readily owned the +misunderstanding that had existed, and that the deceased was the worst +enemy he had in the world. Indeed he was his only enemy, and he could +not tell the reason that had made him so. He had employed every effort +to overcome his animosity, but in vain. The deceased had upon all +occasions sought to mortify him, and do him an ill turn; but he had +resolved never to be engaged in a broil with him, and till this day he +had succeeded. If he had met with a misfortune with any other man, +people at least might have thought it accident; but now it would always +be believed that he had acted from secret malice and a bad heart. + +The fact was, that he and his sweetheart had gone to a neighbouring +fair, where this man had met them. The man had often tried to affront +him; and his passiveness, interpreted into cowardice, had perhaps +encouraged the other to additional rudeness. Finding that he had endured +trivial insults to himself with an even temper, the deceased now thought +proper to turn his brutality upon the young woman that accompanied him. +He pursued them; he endeavoured in various manners to harass and vex +them; they had sought in vain to shake him off. The young woman was +considerably terrified. The accused expostulated with their persecutor, +and asked him how he could be so barbarous as to persist in frightening +a woman? He replied with an insulting tone, "Then the woman should find +some one able to protect her; people that encouraged and trusted to such +a thief as that, deserved no better!" The accused tried every expedient +he could invent; at length he could endure it no longer; he became +exasperated, and challenged the assailant. The challenge was accepted; a +ring was formed; he confided the care of his sweetheart to a bystander; +and unfortunately the first blow he struck proved fatal. + +The accused added, that he did not care what became of him. He had been +anxious to go through the world in an inoffensive manner, and now he had +the guilt of blood upon him. He did not know but it would be kindness in +them to hang him out of the way; for his conscience would reproach him +as long as he lived, and the figure of the deceased, as he had lain +senseless and without motion at his feet, would perpetually haunt him. +The thought of this man, at one moment full of life and vigour, and the +next lifted a helpless corpse from the ground, and all owing to him, was +a thought too dreadful to be endured. He had loved the poor maiden, who +had been the innocent occasion of this, with all his heart; but from +this time he should never support the sight of her. The sight would +bring a tribe of fiends in its rear. One unlucky minute had poisoned all +his hopes, and made life a burden to him. Saying this, his countenance +fell, the muscles of his face trembled with agony, and he looked the +statue of despair. + +This was the story of which Mr. Falkland was called upon to be the +auditor. Though the incidents were, for the most part, wide of those +which belonged to the adventures of the preceding volume, and there had +been much less policy and skill displayed on either part in this rustic +encounter, yet there were many points which, to a man who bore the +former strongly in his recollection, suggested a sufficient resemblance. +In each case it was a human brute persisting in a course of hostility to +a man of benevolent character, and suddenly and terribly cut off in the +midst of his career. These points perpetually smote upon the heart of +Mr. Falkland. He at one time started with astonishment, and at another +shifted his posture, like a man who is unable longer to endure the +sensations that press upon him. Then he new strung his nerves to +stubborn patience. I could see, while his muscles preserved an +inflexible steadiness, tears of anguish roll down his cheeks. He dared +not trust his eyes to glance towards the side of the room where I stood; +and this gave an air of embarrassment to his whole figure. But when the +accused came to speak of his feelings, to describe the depth of his +compunction for an involuntary fault, he could endure it no longer. He +suddenly rose, and with every mark of horror and despair rushed out of +the room. + +This circumstance made no material difference in the affair of the +accused. The parties were detained about half an hour. Mr. Falkland had +already heard the material parts of the evidence in person. At the +expiration of that interval, he sent for Mr. Collins out of the room. +The story of the culprit was confirmed by many witnesses who had seen +the transaction. Word was brought that my master was indisposed; and, at +the same time, the accused was ordered to be discharged. The vengeance +of the brother however, as I afterwards found, did not rest here, and he +met with a magistrate, more scrupulous or more despotic, by whom the +culprit was committed for trial. + +This affair was no sooner concluded, than I hastened into the garden, +and plunged into the deepest of its thickets. My mind was full, almost +to bursting. I no sooner conceived myself sufficiently removed from all +observation, than my thoughts forced their way spontaneously to my +tongue, and I exclaimed, in a fit of uncontrollable enthusiasm, "This is +the murderer; the Hawkinses were innocent! I am sure of it! I will +pledge my life for it! It is out! It is discovered! Guilty, upon my +soul!" + +While I thus proceeded with hasty steps along the most secret paths of +the garden, and from time to time gave vent to the tumult of my thoughts +in involuntary exclamations, I felt as if my animal system had undergone +a total revolution. My blood boiled within me. I was conscious to a kind +of rapture for which I could not account. I was solemn, yet full of +rapid emotion, burning with indignation and energy. In the very tempest +and hurricane of the passions, I seemed to enjoy the most soul-ravishing +calm. I cannot better express the then state of my mind than by saying, +I was never so perfectly alive as at that moment. + +This state of mental elevation continued for several hours, but at +length subsided, and gave place to more deliberate reflection. One of +the first questions that then occurred was, what shall I do with the +knowledge I have been so eager to acquire? I had no inclination to turn +informer. I felt what I had had no previous conception of, that it was +possible to love a murderer, and, as I then understood it, the worst of +murderers. I conceived it to be in the highest degree absurd and +iniquitous, to cut off a man qualified for the most essential and +extensive utility, merely out of retrospect to an act which, whatever +were its merits, could not be retrieved. + +This thought led me to another, which had at first passed unnoticed. If +I had been disposed to turn informer, what had occurred amounted to no +evidence that was admissible in a court of justice. Well then, added I, +if it be such as would not be admitted at a criminal tribunal, am I sure +it is such as I ought to admit? There were twenty persons besides myself +present at the scene from which I pretend to derive such entire +conviction. Not one of them saw it in the light that I did. It either +appeared to them a casual and unimportant circumstance, or they thought +it sufficiently accounted for by Mr. Falkland's infirmity and +misfortunes. Did it really contain such an extent of arguments and +application, that nobody but I was discerning enough to see? + +But all this reasoning produced no alteration in my way of thinking. For +this time I could not get it out of my mind for a moment: "Mr. Falkland +is the murderer! He is guilty! I see it! I feel it! I am sure of it!" +Thus was I hurried along by an uncontrollable destiny. The state of my +passions in their progressive career, the inquisitiveness and impatience +of my thoughts, appeared to make this determination unavoidable. + +An incident occurred while I was in the garden, that seemed to make no +impression upon me at the time, but which I recollected when my thoughts +were got into somewhat of a slower motion. In the midst of one of my +paroxysms of exclamation, and when I thought myself most alone, the +shadow of a man as avoiding me passed transiently by me at a small +distance. Though I had scarcely caught a faint glimpse of his person, +there was something in the occurrence that persuaded me it was Mr. +Falkland. I shuddered at the possibility of his having overheard the +words of my soliloquy. But this idea, alarming as it was, had not power +immediately to suspend the career of my reflections. Subsequent +circumstances however brought back the apprehension to my mind. I had +scarcely a doubt of its reality, when dinner-time came, and Mr. Falkland +was not to be found. Supper and bed-time passed in the same manner. The +only conclusion made by his servants upon this circumstance was, that he +was gone upon one of his accustomed melancholy rambles. + + + + +CHAPTER VI. + + +The period at which my story is now arrived seemed as if it were the +very crisis of the fortune of Mr. Falkland. Incident followed upon +incident, in a kind of breathless succession. About nine o'clock the +next morning an alarm was given, that one of the chimneys of the house +was on fire. No accident could be apparently more trivial; but presently +it blazed with such fury, as to make it clear that some beam of the +house, which in the first building had been improperly placed, had been +reached by the flames. Some danger was apprehended for the whole +edifice. The confusion was the greater, in consequence of the absence of +the master, as well as of Mr. Collins, the steward. While some of the +domestics were employed in endeavouring to extinguish the flames, it was +thought proper that others should busy themselves in removing the most +valuable moveables to a lawn in the garden. I took some command in the +affair, to which indeed my station in the family seemed to entitle me, +and for which I was judged qualified by my understanding and mental +resources. + +Having given some general directions, I conceived, that it was not +enough to stand by and superintend, but that I should contribute my +personal labour in the public concern. I set out for that purpose; and +my steps, by some mysterious fatality, were directed to the private +apartment at the end of the library. Here, as I looked round, my eye was +suddenly caught by the trunk mentioned in the first pages of my +narrative. + +My mind was already raised to its utmost pitch. In a window-seat of the +room lay a number of chisels and other carpenter's tools. I know not +what infatuation instantaneously seized me. The idea was too powerful to +be resisted. I forgot the business upon which I came, the employment of +the servants, and the urgency of general danger. I should have done the +same if the flames that seemed to extend as they proceeded, and already +surmounted the house, had reached this very apartment. I snatched a tool +suitable for the purpose, threw myself upon the ground, and applied with +eagerness to a magazine which inclosed all for which my heart panted. +After two or three efforts, in which the energy of uncontrollable +passion was added to my bodily strength, the fastenings gave way, the +trunk opened, and all that I sought was at once within my reach. + +I was in the act of lifting up the lid, when Mr. Falkland entered, wild, +breathless, distracted in his looks! He had been brought home from a +considerable distance by the sight of the flames. At the moment of his +appearance the lid dropped down from my hand. He no sooner saw me than +his eyes emitted sparks of rage. He ran with eagerness to a brace of +loaded pistols which hung in the room, and, seizing one, presented it to +my head. I saw his design, and sprang to avoid it; but, with the same +rapidity with which he had formed his resolution, he changed it, and +instantly went to the window, and flung the pistol into the court below. +He bade me begone with his usual irresistible energy; and, overcome as +I was already by the horror of the detection, I eagerly complied. + +A moment after, a considerable part of the chimney tumbled with noise +into the court below, and a voice exclaimed that the fire was more +violent than ever. These circumstances seemed to produce a mechanical +effect upon my patron, who, having first locked the closet, appeared on +the outside of the house, ascended the roof, and was in a moment in +every place where his presence was required. The flames were at length +extinguished. + +The reader can with difficulty form a conception of the state to which I +was now reduced. My act was in some sort an act of insanity; but how +undescribable are the feelings with which I looked back upon it! It was +an instantaneous impulse, a short-lived and passing alienation of mind; +but what must Mr. Falkland think of that alienation? To any man a person +who had once shown himself capable of so wild a flight of the mind, must +appear dangerous: how must he appear to a man under Mr. Falkland's +circumstances? I had just had a pistol held to my head, by a man +resolved to put a period to my existence. That indeed was past; but what +was it that fate had yet in reserve for me! The insatiable vengeance of +a Falkland, of a man whose hands were, to my apprehension, red with +blood, and his thoughts familiar with cruelty and murder. How great were +the resources of his mind, resources henceforth to be confederated for +my destruction! This was the termination of an ungoverned curiosity, an +impulse that I had represented to myself as so innocent or so venial. + +In the high tide of boiling passion I had overlooked all consequences. +It now appeared to me like a dream. Is it in man to leap from the +high-raised precipice, or rush unconcerned into the midst of flames? Was +it possible I could have forgotten for a moment the awe-creating manners +of Falkland, and the inexorable fury I should awake in his soul? No +thought of future security had reached my mind. I had acted upon no +plan. I had conceived no means of concealing my deed, after it had once +been effected. But it was over now. One short minute had effected a +reverse in my situation, the suddenness of which the history of man, +perhaps is unable to surpass. + +I have always been at a loss to account for my having plunged thus +headlong into an act so monstrous. There is something in it of +unexplained and involuntary sympathy. One sentiment flows, by necessity +of nature, into another sentiment of the same general character. This +was the first instance in which I had witnessed a danger by fire. All +was confusion around me, and all changed into hurricane within. The +general situation, to my unpractised apprehension, appeared desperate, +and I by contagion became alike desperate. At first I had been in some +degree calm and collected, but that too was a desperate effort; and when +it gave way, a kind of instant insanity became its successor. + +I had now every thing to fear. And yet what was my fault? It proceeded +from none of those errors which are justly held up to the aversion of +mankind; my object had been neither wealth, nor the means of indulgence, +nor the usurpation of power. No spark of malignity had harboured in my +soul. I had always reverenced the sublime mind of Mr. Falkland; I +reverenced it still. My offence had merely been a mistaken thirst of +knowledge. Such however it was, as to admit neither of forgiveness nor +remission. This epoch was the crisis of my fate, dividing what may be +called the offensive part from the defensive, which has been the sole +business of my remaining years. Alas! my offence was short, not +aggravated by any sinister intention: but the reprisals I was to suffer +are long, and can terminate only with my life! + +In the state in which I found myself, when the recollection of what I +had done flowed back upon my mind, I was incapable of any resolution. +All was chaos and uncertainty within me. My thoughts were too full of +horror to be susceptible of activity. I felt deserted of my intellectual +powers, palsied in mind, and compelled to sit in speechless expectation +of the misery to which I was destined. To my own conception I was like a +man, who, though blasted with lightning, and deprived for ever of the +power of motion, should yet retain the consciousness of his situation. +Death-dealing despair was the only idea of which I was sensible. + +I was still in this situation of mind when Mr. Falkland sent for me. His +message roused me from my trance. In recovering, I felt those sickening +and loathsome sensations, which a man may be supposed at first to endure +who should return from the sleep of death. Gradually I recovered the +power of arranging my ideas and directing my steps. I understood, that +the minute the affair of the fire was over Mr. Falkland had retired to +his own room. It was evening before he ordered me to be called. + +I found in him every token of extreme distress, except that there was an +air of solemn and sad composure that crowned the whole. For the present, +all appearance of gloom, stateliness, and austerity was gone. As I +entered he looked up, and, seeing who it was, ordered me to bolt the +door. I obeyed. He went round the room, and examined its other avenues. +He then returned to where I stood. I trembled in every joint of my +frame. I exclaimed within myself, "What scene of death has Roscius now +to act?" + +"Williams!" said he, in a tone which had more in it of sorrow than +resentment, "I have attempted your life! I am a wretch devoted to the +scorn and execration of mankind!" There he stopped. + +"If there be one being on the whole earth that feels the scorn and +execration due to such a wretch more strongly than another, it is +myself. I have been kept in a state of perpetual torture and madness. +But I can put an end to it and its consequences; and, so far at least as +relates to you, I am determined to do it. I know the price, and--I will +make the purchase. + +"You must swear," said he. "You must attest every sacrament, divine and +human, never to disclose what I am now to tell you."--He dictated the +oath, and I repeated it with an aching heart. I had no power to offer a +word of remark. + +"This confidence," said he, "is of your seeking, not of mine. It is +odious to me, and is dangerous to you." + +Having thus prefaced the disclosure he had to make, he paused. He seemed +to collect himself as for an effort of magnitude. He wiped his face with +his handkerchief. The moisture that incommoded him appeared not to be +tears, but sweat. + +"Look at me. Observe me. Is it not strange that such a one as I should +retain lineaments of a human creature? I am the blackest of villains. I +am the murderer of Tyrrel. I am the assassin of the Hawkinses." + +I started with terror, and was silent. + +"What a story is mine! Insulted, disgraced, polluted in the face of +hundreds, I was capable of any act of desperation. I watched my +opportunity, followed Mr. Tyrrel from the rooms, seized a sharp-pointed +knife that fell in my way, came behind him, and stabbed him to the +heart. My gigantic oppressor rolled at my feet. + +"All are but links of one chain. A blow! A murder! My next business was +to defend myself, to tell so well-digested a lie as that all mankind +should believe it true. Never was a task so harrowing and intolerable! + +"Well, thus far fortune favoured me; she favoured me beyond my desire. +The guilt was removed from me, and cast upon another; but this I was to +endure. Whence came the circumstantial evidence against him, the broken +knife and the blood, I am unable to tell. I suppose, by some miraculous +accident, Hawkins was passing by, and endeavoured to assist his +oppressor in the agonies of death. You have heard his story; you have +read one of his letters. But you do not know the thousandth part of the +proofs of his simple and unalterable rectitude that I have known. His +son suffered with him; that son, for the sake of whose happiness and +virtue he ruined himself, and would have died a hundred times.--I have +had feelings, but I cannot describe them. + +"This it is to be a gentleman! a man of honour! I was the fool of fame. +My virtue, my honesty, my everlasting peace of mind, were cheap +sacrifices to be made at the shrine of this divinity. But, what is +worse, there is nothing that has happened that has in any degree +contributed to my cure. I am as much the fool of fame as ever. I cling +to it to my last breath. Though I be the blackest of villains, I will +leave behind me a spotless and illustrious name. There is no crime so +malignant, no scene of blood so horrible, in which that object cannot +engage me. It is no matter that I regard these things at a distance with +aversion;--I am sure of it; bring me to the test, and I shall yield. I +despise myself, but thus I am; things are gone too far to be recalled. + +"Why is it that I am compelled to this confidence? From the love of +fame. I should tremble at the sight of every pistol or instrument of +death that offered itself to my hands; and perhaps my next murder may +not be so fortunate as those I have already committed. I had no +alternative but to make you my confidant or my victim. It was better to +trust you with the whole truth under every seal of secrecy, than to live +in perpetual fear of your penetration or your rashness. + +"Do you know what it is you have done? To gratify a foolishly +inquisitive humour, you have sold yourself. You shall continue in my +service, but can never share my affection. I will benefit you in respect +of fortune, but I shall always hate you. If ever an unguarded word +escape from your lips, if ever you excite my jealousy or suspicion, +expect to pay for it by your death or worse. It is a dear bargain you +have made. But it is too late to look back. I charge and adjure you by +every thing that is sacred, and that is tremendous, preserve your faith! + +"My tongue has now for the first time for several years spoken the +language of my heart; and the intercourse from this hour shall be shut +for ever. I want no pity. I desire no consolation. Surrounded as I am +with horrors, I will at least preserve my fortitude to the last. If I +had been reserved to a different destiny, I have qualities in that +respect worthy of a better cause. I can be mad, miserable, and frantic; +but even in frenzy I can preserve my presence of mind and discretion." + +Such was the story I had been so desirous to know. Though my mind had +brooded upon the subject for months, there was not a syllable of it that +did not come to my ear with the most perfect sense of novelty. "Mr. +Falkland is a murderer!" said I, as I retired from the conference. This +dreadful appellative, "a murderer," made my very blood run cold within +me. "He killed Mr. Tyrrel, for he could not control his resentment and +anger: he sacrificed Hawkins the elder and Hawkins the younger, because +he could upon no terms endure the public loss of honour: how can I +expect that a man thus passionate and unrelenting will not sooner or +later make me his victim?" + +But, notwithstanding this terrible application of the story, an +application to which perhaps in some form or other, mankind are indebted +for nine tenths of their abhorrence against vice, I could not help +occasionally recurring to reflections of an opposite nature. "Mr. +Falkland is a murderer!" resumed I. "He might yet be a most excellent +man, if he did but think so." It is the thinking ourselves vicious then, +that principally contributes to make us vicious. + +Amidst the shock I received from finding, what I had never suffered +myself constantly to believe, that my suspicions were true, I still +discovered new cause of admiration for my master. His menaces indeed +were terrible. But, when I recollected the offence I had given, so +contrary to every received principle of civilised society, so insolent +and rude, so intolerable to a man of Mr. Falkland's elevation, and in +Mr. Falkland's peculiarity of circumstances, I was astonished at his +forbearance. There were indeed sufficiently obvious reasons why he might +not choose to proceed to extremities with me. But how different from the +fearful expectations I had conceived were the calmness of his +behaviour, and the regulated mildness of his language! In this respect, +I for a short time imagined that I was emancipated from the mischiefs +which had appalled me; and that, in having to do with a man of Mr. +Falkland's liberality, I had nothing rigorous to apprehend. + +"It is a miserable prospect," said I, "that he holds up to me. He +imagines that I am restrained by no principles, and deaf to the claims +of personal excellence. But he shall find himself mistaken. I will never +become an informer. I will never injure my patron; and therefore he will +not be my enemy. With all his misfortunes and all his errors, I feel +that my soul yearns for his welfare. If he have been criminal, that is +owing to circumstances; the same qualities under other circumstances +would have been, or rather were, sublimely beneficent." + +My reasonings were, no doubt, infinitely more favourable to Mr. +Falkland, than those which human beings are accustomed to make in the +case of such as they style great criminals. This will not be wondered +at, when it is considered that I had myself just been trampling on the +established boundaries of obligation, and therefore might well have a +fellow-feeling for other offenders. Add to which, I had known Mr. +Falkland from the first as a beneficent divinity. I had observed at +leisure, and with a minuteness which could not deceive me, the excellent +qualities of his heart; and I found him possessed of a mind beyond +comparison the most fertile and accomplished I had ever known. + +But though the terrors which had impressed me were considerably +alleviated, my situation was notwithstanding sufficiently miserable. The +ease and light-heartedness of my youth were for ever gone. The voice of +an irresistible necessity had commanded me to "sleep no more." I was +tormented with a secret, of which I must never disburthen myself; and +this consciousness was, at my age, a source of perpetual melancholy. I +had made myself a prisoner, in the most intolerable sense of that term, +for years--perhaps for the rest of my life. Though my prudence and +discretion should be invariable, I must remember that I should have an +overseer, vigilant from conscious guilt, full of resentment at the +unjustifiable means by which I had extorted from him a confession, and +whose lightest caprice might at any time decide upon every thing that +was dear to me. The vigilance even of a public and systematical +despotism is poor, compared with a vigilance which is thus goaded by the +most anxious passions of the soul. Against this species of persecution I +knew not how to invent a refuge. I dared neither fly from the +observation of Mr. Falkland, nor continue exposed to its operation. I +was at first indeed lulled in a certain degree to security upon the +verge of the precipice. But it was not long before I found a thousand +circumstances perpetually reminding me of my true situation. Those I am +now to relate are among the most memorable. + + + + +CHAPTER VII. + + +In no long time after the disclosure Mr. Falkland had made, Mr. +Forester, his elder brother by the mother's side, came to reside for a +short period in our family. This was a circumstance peculiarly adverse +to my patron's habits and inclinations. He had broken off, as I have +already said, all intercourse of visiting with his neighbours. He +debarred himself every kind of amusement and relaxation. He shrunk from +the society of his fellows, and thought he could never be sufficiently +buried in obscurity and solitude. This principle was, in most cases, of +no difficult execution to a man of firmness. But Mr. Falkland knew not +how to avoid the visit of Mr. Forester. This gentleman was just returned +from a residence of several years upon the continent; and his demand of +an apartment in the house of his half-brother, till his own house at the +distance of thirty miles should be prepared for his reception, was made +with an air of confidence that scarcely admitted of a refusal. Mr. +Falkland could only allege, that the state of his health and spirits was +such, that lie feared a residence at his house would be little agreeable +to his kinsman; and Mr. Forester conceived that this was a +disqualification which would always augment in proportion as it was +tolerated, and hoped that his society, by inducing Mr. Falkland to +suspend his habits of seclusion, would be the means of essential +benefit. Mr. Falkland opposed him no further. He would have been sorry +to be thought unkind to a kinsman for whom he had a particular esteem; +and the consciousness of not daring to assign the true reason, made him +cautious of adhering to his objection. + +The character of Mr. Forester was, in many respects, the reverse of that +of my master. His very appearance indicated the singularity of his +disposition. His figure was short and angular. His eyes were sunk far +into his head, and were overhung with eye-brows, black, thick, and +bushy. His complexion was swarthy, and his lineaments hard. He had seen +much of the world; but, to judge of him from his appearance and manners, +one would have thought that he had never moved from his fire-side. + +His temper was acid, petulant, and harsh. He was easily offended by +trifles, respecting which, previously to the offence, the persons with +whom he had intercourse could have no suspicion of such a result. When +offended, his customary behaviour was exceedingly rugged. He thought +only of setting the delinquent right, and humbling him for his error; +and, in his eagerness to do this, overlooked the sensibility of the +sufferer, and the pains he inflicted. Remonstrance in such a case he +regarded as the offspring of cowardice, which was to be extirpated with +a steady and unshrinking hand, and not soothed with misjudging kindness +and indulgence. As is usual in human character, he had formed a system +of thinking to suit the current of his feelings. He held that the +kindness we entertain for a man should be veiled and concealed, exerted +in substantial benefits, but not disclosed, lest an undue advantage +should be taken of it by its object. + +With this rugged outside, Mr. Forester had a warm and generous heart. At +first sight all men were deterred by his manner, and excited to give him +an ill character. But the longer any one knew him, the more they +approved him. His harshness was then only considered as habit; and +strong sense and active benevolence were uppermost in the recollection +of his familiar acquaintance. His conversation, when he condescended to +lay aside his snappish, rude, and abrupt half-sentences, became flowing +in diction, and uncommonly amusing with regard to its substance. He +combined, with weightiness of expression, a dryness of characteristic +humour, that demonstrated at once the vividness of his observation, and +the force of his understanding. The peculiarities of this gentleman's +character were not undisplayed in the scene to which he was now +introduced. Having much kindness in his disposition, he soon became +deeply interested in the unhappiness of his relation. He did every thing +in his power to remove it; but his attempts were rude and unskilful. +With a mind so accomplished and a spirit so susceptible as that of Mr. +Falkland, Mr. Forester did not venture to let loose his usual violence +of manner; but, if he carefully abstained from harshness, he was however +wholly incapable of that sweet and liquid eloquence of the soul, which +would perhaps have stood the fairest chance of seducing Mr. Falkland for +a moment to forget his anguish. He exhorted his host to rouse up his +spirit, and defy the foul fiend; but the tone of his exhortations found +no sympathetic chord in the mind of my patron. He had not the skill to +carry conviction to an understanding so well fortified in error. In a +word, after a thousand efforts of kindness to his entertainer, he drew +off his forces, growling and dissatisfied with his own impotence, rather +than angry at the obstinacy of Mr. Falkland. He felt no diminution of +his affection for him, and was sincerely grieved to find that he was so +little capable of serving him. Both parties in this case did justice to +the merits of the other; at the same time that the disparity of their +humours was such, as to prevent the stranger from being in any degree a +dangerous companion to the master of the house. They had scarcely one +point of contact in their characters. Mr. Forester was incapable of +giving Mr. Falkland that degree either of pain or pleasure, which can +raise the soul into a tumult, and deprive it for a while of tranquillity +and self-command. + +Our visitor was a man, notwithstanding appearances, of a peculiarly +sociable disposition, and, where he was neither interrupted nor +contradicted, considerably loquacious. He began to feel himself +painfully out of his element upon the present occasion. Mr. Falkland +was devoted to contemplation and solitude. He put upon himself some +degree of restraint upon the arrival of his kinsman, though even then +his darling habits would break out. But when they had seen each other a +certain number of times, and it was sufficiently evident that the +society of either would be a burthen rather than a pleasure to the +other, they consented, by a sort of silent compact, that each should be +at liberty to follow his own inclination. Mr. Falkland was, in a sense, +the greatest gainer by this. He returned to the habits of his choice, +and acted, as nearly as possible, just as he would have done if Mr. +Forester had not been in existence. But the latter was wholly at a loss. +He had all the disadvantages of retirement, without being able, as he +might have done at his house, to bring his own associates or his own +amusements about him. + +In this situation he cast his eyes upon me. It was his principle to do +every thing that his thoughts suggested, without caring for the forms of +the world. He saw no reason why a peasant, with certain advantages of +education and opportunity, might not be as eligible a companion as a +lord; at the same time that he was deeply impressed with the +venerableness of old institutions. Reduced as he was to a kind of last +resort, he found me better qualified for his purpose than any other of +Mr. Falkland's household. + +The manner in which he began this sort of correspondence was +sufficiently characteristical. It was abrupt; but it was strongly +stamped with essential benevolence. It was blunt and humorous; but there +was attractiveness, especially in a case of unequal intercourse, in that +very rusticity by which he levelled himself with the mass of his +species. He had to reconcile himself as well as to invite me; not to +reconcile himself to the postponing an aristocratical vanity, for of +that he had a very slender portion, but to the trouble of invitation, +for he loved his ease. All this produced some irregularity and +indecision in his own mind, and gave a whimsical impression to his +behaviour. + +On my part, I was by no means ungrateful for the distinction that was +paid me. My mind had been relaxed into temporary dejection, but my +reserve had no alloy of moroseness or insensibility. It did not long +hold out against the condescending attentions of Mr. Forester. I became +gradually heedful, encouraged, confiding. I had a most eager thirst for +the knowledge of mankind; and though no person perhaps ever purchased so +dearly the instructions he received in that school, the inclination was +in no degree diminished. Mr. Forester was the second man I had seen +uncommonly worthy of my analysis, and who seemed to my thoughts, arrived +as I was at the end of my first essay, almost as much deserving to be +studied as Mr. Falkland himself. I was glad to escape from the +uneasiness of my reflections; and, while engaged with this new friend, I +forgot the criticalness of the evils with which I was hourly menaced. + +Stimulated by these feelings, I was what Mr. Forester wanted, a diligent +and zealous hearer, I was strongly susceptible of impression; and the +alternate impressions my mind received, visibly displayed themselves in +my countenance and gestures. The observations Mr. Forester had made in +his travels, the set of opinions he had formed, all amused and +interested me. His manner of telling a story, or explaining his +thoughts, was forcible, perspicuous, and original: his style in +conversation had an uncommon zest. Every thing he had to relate +delighted me; while, in return, my sympathy, my eager curiosity, and my +unsophisticated passions, rendered me to Mr. Forester a most desirable +hearer. It is not to be wondered at, therefore, that every day rendered +our intercourse more intimate and cordial. + +Mr. Falkland was destined to be for ever unhappy; and it seemed as if no +new incident could occur, from which he was not able to extract food for +this imperious propensity. He was wearied with a perpetual repetition of +similar impressions; and entertained an invincible disgust against all +that was new. The visit of Mr. Forester he regarded with antipathy. He +was scarcely able to look at him without shuddering; an emotion which +his guest perceived, and pitied as the result of habit and disease, +rather than of judgment. None of his actions passed unremarked; the most +indifferent excited uneasiness and apprehension. The first overtures of +intimacy between me and Mr. Forester probably gave birth to sentiments +of jealousy in the mind of my master. The irregular, variable character +of his visitor tended to heighten them, by producing an appearance of +inexplicableness and mystery. At this time he intimated to me that it +was not agreeable to him, that there should be much intercourse between +me and this gentleman. + +What could I do? Young as I was, could it be expected that I should play +the philosopher, and put a perpetual curb upon my inclinations? +Imprudent though I had been, could I voluntarily subject myself to an +eternal penance, and estrangement from human society? Could I discourage +a frankness so perfectly in consonance with my wishes, and receive in an +ungracious way a kindness that stole away my heart? + +Besides this, I was but ill prepared for the servile submission Mr. +Falkland demanded. In early life I had been accustomed to be much my own +master. When I first entered into Mr. Falkland's service, my personal +habits were checked by the novelty of my situation, and my affections +were gained by the high accomplishments of my patron. To novelty and its +influence, curiosity had succeeded: curiosity, so long as it lasted, was +a principle stronger in my bosom than even the love of independence. To +that I would have sacrificed my liberty or my life; to gratify it, I +would have submitted to the condition of a West Indian negro, or to the +tortures inflicted by North American savages. But the turbulence of +curiosity had now subsided. + +As long as the threats of Mr. Falkland had been confined to generals, I +endured it. I was conscious of the unbecoming action I had committed, +and this rendered me humble. But, when he went further, and undertook to +prescribe to every article of my conduct, my patience was at an end. My +mind, before sufficiently sensible to the unfortunate situation to which +my imprudence had reduced me, now took a nearer and a more alarming view +of the circumstances of the case. Mr. Falkland was not an old man; he +had in him the principles of vigour, however they might seem to be +shaken; he might live as long as I should. I was his prisoner; and what +a prisoner! All my actions observed; all my gestures marked. I could +move neither to the right nor the left, but the eye of my keeper was +upon me. He watched me; and his vigilance was a sickness to my heart. +For me there was no more freedom, no more of hilarity, of +thoughtlessness, or of youth. Was this the life upon which I had entered +with such warm and sanguine expectation? Were my days to be wasted in +this cheerless gloom; a galley-slave in the hands of the system of +nature, whom death only, the death of myself or my inexorable superior, +could free? + +I had been adventurous in the gratification of an infantine and +unreasonable curiosity; and I resolved not to be less adventurous, if +need were, in the defence of every thing that can make life a blessing. +I was prepared for an amicable adjustment of interests: I would +undertake that Mr. Falkland should never sustain injury through my +means; but I expected in return that I should suffer no encroachment, +but be left to the direction of my own understanding. + +I went on, then, to seek Mr. Forester's society with eagerness; and it +is the nature of an intimacy that does not decline, progressively to +increase. Mr. Falkland observed these symptoms with visible +perturbation. Whenever I was conscious of their being perceived by him, +I betrayed tokens of confusion: this did not tend to allay his +uneasiness. One day he spoke to me alone; and, with a look of mysterious +but terrible import, expressed himself thus:-- + +"Young man, take warning! Perhaps this is the last time you shall have +an opportunity to take it! I will not always be the butt of your +simplicity and inexperience, nor suffer your weakness to triumph over my +strength! Why do you trifle with me? You little suspect the extent of my +power. At this moment you are enclosed with the snares of my vengeance +unseen by you, and, at the instant that you flatter yourself you are +already beyond their reach, they will close upon you. You might as well +think of escaping from the power of the omnipresent God, as from mine! +If you could touch so much as my finger, you should expiate it in hours +and months and years of a torment, of which as yet you have not the +remotest idea. Remember! I am not talking at random! I do not utter a +word, that, if you provoke me, shall not be executed to the severest +letter!" + +It may be supposed that these menaces were not without their effect. I +withdrew in silence. My whole soul revolted against the treatment I +endured, and yet I could not utter a word. Why could not I speak the +expostulations of my heart, or propose the compromise I meditated? It +was inexperience, and not want of strength, that awed me. Every act of +Mr. Falkland contained something new, and I was unprepared to meet it. +Perhaps it will be found that the greatest hero owes the propriety of +his conduct to the habit of encountering difficulties, and calling out +with promptness the energies of his mind. + +I contemplated the proceedings of my patron with the deepest +astonishment. Humanity and general kindness were fundamental parts of +his character; but in relation to me they were sterile and inactive. His +own interest required that he should purchase my kindness; but he +preferred to govern me by terror, and watch me with unceasing anxiety. I +ruminated with the most mournful sensations upon the nature of my +calamity. I believed that no human being was ever placed in a situation +so pitiable as mine. Every atom of my frame seemed to have a several +existence, and to crawl within me. I had but too much reason to believe +that Mr. Falkland's threats were not empty words. I knew his ability; I +felt his ascendancy. If I encountered him, what chance had I of victory? +If I were defeated, what was the penalty I had to suffer? Well then, the +rest of my life must be devoted to slavish subjection. Miserable +sentence! And, if it were, what security had I against the injustice of +a man, vigilant, capricious, and criminal? I envied the condemned wretch +upon the scaffold; I envied the victim of the inquisition in the midst +of his torture. They know what they have to suffer. I had only to +imagine every thing terrible, and then say, "The fate reserved for me +is worse than this!" + +It was well for me that these sensations were transient: human nature +could not long support itself under what I then felt. By degrees my mind +shook off its burthen. Indignation succeeded to emotions of terror. The +hostility of Mr. Falkland excited hostility in me. I determined I would +never calumniate him in matters of the most trivial import, much less +betray the grand secret upon which every thing dear to him depended. +But, totally abjuring the offensive, I resolved to stand firmly upon the +defensive. The liberty of acting as I pleased I would preserve, whatever +might be the risk. If I were worsted in the contest, I would at least +have the consolation of reflecting that I had exerted myself with +energy. In proportion as I thus determined, I drew off my forces from +petty incursions, and felt the propriety of acting with premeditation +and system. I ruminated incessantly upon plans of deliverance, but I was +anxious that my choice should not be precipitately made. + +It was during this period of my deliberation and uncertainty that Mr. +Forester terminated his visit. He observed a strange distance in my +behaviour, and, in his good-natured, rough way, reproached me for it. I +could only answer with a gloomy look of mysterious import, and a +mournful and expressive silence. He sought me for an explanation, but I +was now as ingenious in avoiding as I had before been ardent to seek +him; and he quitted our house, as he afterwards told me, with an +impression, that there was some ill destiny that hung over it, which +seemed fated to make all its inhabitants miserable, without its being +possible for a bystander to penetrate the reason. + + + + +CHAPTER VIII. + + +Mr. Forester had left us about three weeks, when Mr. Falkland sent me +upon some business to an estate he possessed in a neighbouring county, +about fifty miles from his principal residence. The road led in a +direction wholly wide of the habitation of our late visitor. I was upon +my return from the place to which I had been sent, when I began in fancy +to take a survey of the various circumstances of my condition, and by +degrees lost, in the profoundness of my contemplation, all attention to +the surrounding objects. The first determination of my mind was to +escape from the lynx-eyed jealousy and despotism of Mr. Falkland; the +second to provide, by every effort of prudence and deliberation I could +devise, against the danger with which I well knew my attempt must be +accompanied. + +Occupied with these meditations, I rode many miles before I perceived +that I had totally deviated from the right path. At length I roused +myself, and surveyed the horizon round me; but I could observe nothing +with which my organ was previously acquainted. On three sides, the heath +stretched as far as the eye could reach; on the fourth, I discovered at +some distance a wood of no ordinary dimensions. Before me, scarcely a +single track could be found, to mark that any human being had ever +visited the spot. As the best expedient I could devise, I bent my course +towards the wood I have mentioned, and then pursued, as well as I was +able, the windings of the inclosure. This led me, after some time, to +the end of the heath; but I was still as much at a loss as ever +respecting the road I should pursue. The sun was hid from me by a grey +and cloudy atmosphere; I was induced to continue along the skirts of +the wood, and surmounted with some difficulty the hedges and other +obstacles that from time to time presented themselves. My thoughts were +gloomy and disconsolate; the dreariness of the day, and the solitude +which surrounded me, seemed to communicate a sadness to my soul. I had +proceeded a considerable way, and was overcome with hunger and fatigue, +when I discovered a road and a little inn at no great distance. I made +up to them, and upon enquiry found that, instead of pursuing the proper +direction, I had taken one that led to Mr. Forester's rather than to my +own habitation. I alighted, and was entering the house, when the +appearance of that gentleman struck my eyes. + +Mr. Forester accosted me with kindness, invited me into the room where +he had been sitting, and enquired what accident had brought me to that +place. + +While he was speaking, I could not help recollecting the extraordinary +manner in which we were thus once more brought together, and a train of +ideas was by this means suggested to my mind. Some refreshment was, by +Mr. Forester's order, prepared for me; I sat down, and partook of it. +Still this thought dwelt upon my recollection:--"Mr. Falkland will never +be made acquainted with our meeting; I have an opportunity thrown in my +way, which if I do not improve, I shall deserve all the consequences +that may result. I can now converse with a friend, and a powerful +friend, without fear of being watched and overlooked." What wonder that +I was tempted to disclose, not Mr. Falkland's secret, but my own +situation, and receive the advice of a man of worth and experience, +which might perhaps be adequately done without entering into any detail +injurious to my patron? + +Mr. Forester, on his part, expressed a desire to learn why it was I +thought myself unhappy, and why I had avoided him during the latter part +of his residence under the same roof, as evidently as I had before taken +pleasure in his communications. I replied, that I could give him but an +imperfect satisfaction upon these points; but what I could, I would +willingly explain. The fact, I proceeded, was, that there were reasons +which rendered it impossible for me to have a tranquil moment under the +roof of Mr. Falkland. I had revolved the matter again and again in my +mind, and was finally convinced that I owed it to myself to withdraw +from his service. I added, that I was sensible, by this half-confidence, +I might rather seem to merit the disapprobation of Mr. Forester than his +countenance; but I declared my persuasion that, if he could be +acquainted with the whole affair, however strange my behaviour might at +present appear, he would applaud my reserve. + +He appeared to muse for a moment upon what I had said, and then asked +what reason I could have to complain of Mr. Falkland? I replied, that I +entertained the deepest reverence for my patron; I admired his +abilities, and considered him as formed for the benefit of his species. +I should in my own opinion be the vilest of miscreants, if I uttered a +whisper to his disadvantage. But this did not avail: I was not fit for +him; perhaps I was not good enough for him; at all events, I must be +perpetually miserable so long as I continued to live with him. + +I observed Mr. Forester gaze upon me eagerly with curiosity and +surprise; but this circumstance I did not think proper to notice. Having +recovered himself, he enquired, why then, that being the case, I did not +quit his service? I answered, what he now touched upon was that which +most of all contributed to my misfortune. Mr. Falkland was not ignorant +of my dislike to my present situation; perhaps he thought it +unreasonable, unjust; but I knew that he would never be brought to +consent to my giving way to it. + +Here Mr. Forester interrupted me, and, smiling, said, I magnified +obstacles, and over-rated my own importance; adding, that he would +undertake to remove that difficulty, as well as to provide me with a +more agreeable appointment. This suggestion produced in me a serious +alarm. I replied, that I must entreat him upon no account to think of +applying to Mr. Falkland upon the subject. I added, that perhaps I was +only betraying my imbecility; but in reality, unacquainted as I was with +experience and the world, I was afraid, though disgusted with my present +residence, to expose myself upon a mere project of my own, to the +resentment of so considerable a man as Mr. Falkland. If he would favour +me with his advice upon the subject, or if he would only give me leave +to hope for his protection in case of any unforeseen accident, this was +all I presumed to request; and, thus encouraged. I would venture to obey +the dictates of my inclination, and fly in pursuit of my lost +tranquillity. + +Having thus opened myself to this generous friend, as far as I could do +it with propriety and safety, he sat for some time silent, with an air +of deep reflection. At length, with a countenance of unusual severity, +and a characteristic fierceness of manner and voice, he thus addressed +me: "Young man, perhaps you are ignorant of the nature of the conduct +you at present hold. May be, you do not know that where there is +mystery, there is always something at bottom that will not bear the +telling. Is this the way to obtain the favour of a man of consequence +and respectability? To pretend to make a confidence, and then tell him a +disjointed story that has not common sense in it!" + +I answered, that, whatever were the amount of that prejudice, I must +submit. I placed my hope of a candid construction, in the present +instance, in the rectitude of his nature. + +He went on: "You do so; do you? I tell you, sir, the rectitude of my +nature is an enemy to disguise. Come, boy, you must know that I +understand these things better than you. Tell all, or expect nothing +from me but censure and contempt." + +"Sir," replied I, "I have spoken from deliberation; I have told you my +choice, and, whatever be the result, I must abide by it. If in this +misfortune you refuse me your assistance, here I must end, having gained +by the communication only your ill opinion and displeasure." + +He looked hard at me, as if he would see me through. At length he +relaxed his features, and softened his manner. "You are a foolish, +headstrong boy," said he, "and I shall have an eye upon you. I shall +never place in you the confidence I have done. But--I will not desert +you. At present, the balance between approbation and dislike is in your +favour. How long it will last, I cannot tell; I engage for nothing. But +it is my rule to act as I feel. I will for this time do as you +require;--and, pray God, it may answer. I will receive you, either now +or hereafter, under my roof, trusting that I shall have no reason to +repent, and that appearances will terminate as favourably as I wish, +though I scarcely know how to hope it." + +We were engaged in the earnest discussion of subjects thus interesting +to my peace, when we were interrupted by an event the most earnestly to +have been deprecated. Without the smallest notice, and as if he had +dropped upon us from the clouds, Mr. Falkland burst into the room. I +found afterwards that Mr. Forester had come thus far upon an +appointment to meet Mr. Falkland, and that the place of their intended +rendezvous was at the next stage. Mr. Forester was detained at the inn +where we now were by our accidental rencounter, and in reality had for +the moment forgotten his appointment; while Mr. Falkland, not finding +him where he expected, proceeded thus far towards the house of his +kinsman. To me the meeting was most unaccountable in the world. + +I instantly foresaw the dreadful complication of misfortune that was +included in this event. To Mr. Falkland, the meeting between me and his +relation must appear not accidental, but, on my part at least, the +result of design. I was totally out of the road I had been travelling by +his direction; I was in a road that led directly to the house of Mr. +Forester. What must he think of this? How must he suppose I came to that +place? The truth, if told, that I came there without design, and purely +in consequence of having lost my way, must appear to be the most +palpable lie that ever was devised. + +Here then I stood detected in the fact of that intercourse which had +been so severely forbidden. But in this instance it was infinitely worse +than in those which had already given so much disturbance to Mr. +Falkland. It was then frank and unconcealed; and therefore the +presumption was, that it was for purposes that required no concealment. +But the present interview, if concerted, was in the most emphatical +degree clandestine. Nor was it less perilous than it was clandestine: it +had been forbidden with the most dreadful menaces; and Mr. Falkland was +not ignorant how deep an impression those menaces had made upon my +imagination. Such a meeting therefore could not have been concerted +under such circumstances, for a trivial purpose, or for any purpose +that his heart did not ache to think of. Such was the amount of my +crime, such was the agony my appearance was calculated to inspire; and +it was reasonable to suppose that the penalty I had to expect would be +proportionable. The threats of Mr. Falkland still sounded in my ears, +and I was in a transport of terror. + +The conduct of the same man in different circumstances, is often so +various as to render it very difficult to be accounted for. Mr. +Falkland, in this to him, terrible crisis, did not seem to be in any +degree hurried away by passion. For a moment he was dumb; his eyes +glared with astonishment; and the next moment, as it were, he had the +most perfect calmness and self-command. Had it been otherwise, I have no +doubt that I should instantly have entered into an explanation of the +manner in which I came there, the ingenuousness and consistency of which +could not but have been in some degree attended with a favourable event. +But, as it was, I suffered myself to be overcome; I yielded, as in a +former instance, to the discomfiting influence of surprise. I dared +scarcely breathe; I observed the appearances with equal anxiety and +surprise. Mr. Falkland quietly ordered me to return home, and take along +with me the groom he had brought with him. I obeyed in silence. + +I afterwards understood, that he enquired minutely of Mr. Forester the +circumstances of our meeting; and that that gentleman, perceiving that +the meeting itself was discovered, and guided by habits of frankness, +which, when once rooted in a character, it is difficult to counteract, +told Mr. Falkland every thing that had passed, together with the remarks +it had suggested to his own mind. Mr. Falkland received the +communication with an ambiguous and studied silence, which by no means +operated to my advantage in the already poisoned mind of Mr. Forester. +His silence was partly the direct consequence of a mind watchful, +inquisitive, and doubting; and partly perhaps was adopted for the sake +of the effect it was calculated to produce, Mr. Falkland not being +unwilling to encourage prejudices against a character which might one +day come in competition with his own. + +As to me, I went home indeed, for this was not a moment to resist. Mr. +Falkland, with a premeditation to which he had given the appearance of +accident, had taken care to send with me a guard to attend upon his +prisoner. I seemed as if conducting to one of those fortresses, famed in +the history of despotism, from which the wretched victim is never known +to come forth alive; and when I entered my chamber, I felt as if I were +entering a dungeon. I reflected that I was at the mercy of a man, +exasperated at my disobedience, and who was already formed to cruelty by +successive murders. My prospects were now closed; I was cut off for ever +from pursuits that I had meditated with ineffable delight; my death +might be the event of a few hours. I was a victim at the shrine of +conscious guilt, that knew neither rest nor satiety; I should be blotted +from the catalogue of the living, and my fate remain eternally a secret; +the man who added my murder to his former crimes, would show himself the +next morning, and be hailed with the admiration and applause of his +species. + +In the midst of these terrible imaginations, one idea presented itself +that alleviated my feelings. This was the recollection of the strange +and unaccountable tranquillity which Mr. Falkland had manifested, when +he discovered me in company with Mr. Forester. I was not deceived by +this. I knew that the calm was temporary, and would be succeeded by a +tumult and whirlwind of the most dreadful sort. But a man under the +power of such terrors as now occupied me catches at every reed. I said +to myself, "This tranquillity is a period it is incumbent upon me to +improve; the shorter its duration may be found, the more speedy am I +obliged to be in the use of it." In a word, I took the resolution, +because I already stood in fear of the vengeance of Mr. Falkland, to +risk the possibility of provoking it in a degree still more inexpiable, +and terminate at once my present state of uncertainty. I had now opened +my case to Mr. Forester, and he had given me positive assurances of his +protection. I determined immediately to address the following letter to +Mr. Falkland. The consideration that, if he meditated any thing +tragical, such a letter would only tend to confirm him, did not enter +into the present feelings of my mind. + +"Sir, + +"I have conceived the intention of quitting your service. This is a +measure we ought both of us to desire. I shall then be, what it is my +duty to be, master of my own actions. You will be delivered from the +presence of a person, whom you cannot prevail upon yourself to behold +without unpleasing emotions. + +"Why should you subject me to an eternal penance? Why should you consign +my youthful hopes to suffering and despair? Consult the principles of +humanity that have marked the general course of your proceedings, and do +not let me, I entreat you, be made the subject of a useless severity. My +heart is impressed with gratitude for your favours. I sincerely ask your +forgiveness for the many errors of my conduct. I consider the treatment +I have received under your roof, as one almost uninterrupted scene of +kindness and generosity. I shall never forget my obligations to you, +and will never betray them. + +"I remain, Sir, + +"Your most grateful, respectful, + +"and dutiful servant, + +"CALEB WILLIAMS." + +Such was my employment of the evening of a day which will be ever +memorable in the history of my life. Mr. Falkland not being yet +returned, though expected every hour, I was induced to make use of the +pretence of fatigue to avoid an interview. I went to bed. It may be +imagined that my slumbers were neither deep nor refreshing. + +The next morning I was informed that my patron did not come home till +late; that he had enquired for me, and, being told that I was in bed, +had said nothing further upon the subject. Satisfied in this respect, I +went to the breakfasting parlour, and, though full of anxiety and +trepidation, endeavoured to busy myself in arranging the books, and a +few other little occupations, till Mr. Falkland should come down. After +a short time I heard his step, which I perfectly well knew how to +distinguish, in the passage. Presently he stopped, and, speaking to some +one in a sort of deliberate, but smothered voice, I overheard him repeat +my name as enquiring for me. In conformity to the plan I had persuaded +myself to adopt, I now laid the letter I had written upon the table at +which he usually sat, and made my exit at one door as Mr. Falkland +entered at the other. This done, I withdrew, with flutterings and +palpitation, to a private apartment, a sort of light closet at the end +of the library, where I was accustomed not unfrequently to sit. + +I had not been here three minutes, when I heard the voice of Mr. +Falkland calling me. I went to him in the library. His manner was that +of a man labouring with some dreadful thought, and endeavouring to give +an air of carelessness and insensibility to his behaviour. Perhaps no +carriage of any other sort could have produced a sensation of such +inexplicable horror, or have excited, in the person who was its object, +such anxious uncertainty about the event.--"That is your letter," said +he, throwing it. + +"My lad," continued he, "I believe now you have played all your tricks, +and the farce is nearly at an end! With your apishness and absurdity +however you have taught me one thing; and, whereas before I have winced +at them with torture, I am now as tough as an elephant. I shall crush +you in the end with the same indifference, that I would any other little +insect that disturbed my serenity. + +"I am unable to tell what brought about your meeting with Mr. Forester +yesterday. It might be design; it might be accident. But, I shall not +forget it. You write me here, that you are desirous to quit my service. +To that I have a short answer: You never shall quit it with life. If you +attempt it, you shall never cease to rue your folly as long as you +exist. That is my will; and I will not have it resisted. The very next +time you disobey me in that or any other article, there is an end of +your vagaries for ever. Perhaps your situation may be a pitiable one; it +is for you to look to that. I only know that it is in your power to +prevent its growing worse; no time nor chance shall ever make it better. + +"Do not imagine I am afraid of you! I wear an armour, against which all +your weapons are impotent. I have dug a pit for you; and, whichever way +you move, backward or forward, to the right or the left, it is ready to +swallow you. Be still! If once you fall, call as loud as you will, no +man on earth shall hear your cries; prepare a tale however plausible, or +however true, the whole world shall execrate you for an impostor. Your +innocence shall be of no service to you; I laugh at so feeble a defence. +It is I that say it; you may believe what I tell you--Do you not know, +miserable wretch!" added he, suddenly altering his tone, and stamping +upon the ground with fury, "that I have sworn to preserve my reputation, +whatever be the expense; that I love it more than the whole world and +its inhabitants taken together? And do you think that you shall wound +it? Begone, miscreant! reptile! and cease to contend with insurmountable +power!" + +The part of my history which I am now relating is that which I reflect +upon with the least complacency. Why was it, that I was once more +totally overcome by the imperious carriage of Mr. Falkland, and unable +to utter a word? The reader will be presented with many occasions in the +sequel, in which I wanted neither facility in the invention of +expedients, nor fortitude in entering upon my justification. Persecution +at length gave firmness to my character, and taught me the better part +of manhood. But in the present instance I was irresolute, overawed, and +abashed. + +The speech I had heard was the dictate of frenzy, and it created in me a +similar frenzy. It determined me to do the very thing against which I +was thus solemnly warned, and fly from my patron's house. I could not +enter into parley with him; I could no longer endure the vile +subjugation he imposed on me. It was in vain that my reason warned me of +the rashness of a measure, to be taken without concert or preparation. I +seemed to be in a state in which reason had no power. I felt as if I +could coolly survey the several arguments of the case, perceive that +they had prudence, truth, and common sense on their side; and then +answer, I am under the guidance of a director more energetic than you. + +I was not long in executing what I had thus rapidly determined. I fixed +on the evening of that very day as the period of my evasion. Even in +this short interval I had perhaps sufficient time for deliberation. But +all opportunity was useless to me; my mind was fixed, and each +succeeding moment only increased the unspeakable eagerness with which I +meditated my escape. The hours usually observed by our family in this +country residence were regular; and one in the morning was the time I +selected for my undertaking. + +In searching the apartment where I slept, I had formerly discovered a +concealed door, which led to a small apartment of the most secret +nature, not uncommon in houses so old as that of Mr. Falkland, and which +had perhaps served as a refuge from persecution, or a security from the +inveterate hostilities of a barbarous age. I believed no person was +acquainted with this hiding-place but myself. I felt unaccountably +impelled to remove into it the different articles of my personal +property. I could not at present take them away with me. If I were never +to recover them, I felt that it would be a gratification to my +sentiment, that no trace of my existence should be found after my +departure. Having completed their removal, and waited till the hour I +had previously chosen, I stole down quietly from my chamber with a lamp +in my hand. I went along a passage that led to a small door opening into +the garden, and then crossed the garden, to a gate that intersected an +elm-walk and a private horse-path on the outside. + +I could scarcely believe my good fortune in having thus far executed my +design without interruption. The terrible images Mr. Falkland's menaces +had suggested to my mind, made me expect impediment and detection at +every step; though the impassioned state of my mind impelled me to +advance with desperate resolution. He probably however counted too +securely upon the ascendancy of his sentiments, when imperiously +pronounced, to think it necessary to take precautions against a sinister +event. For myself, I drew a favourable omen as to the final result of my +project, from the smoothness of success that attended it in the outset. + + + + +CHAPTER IX. + + +The first plan that had suggested itself to me was, to go to the nearest +public road, and take the earliest stage for London. There I believed I +should be most safe from discovery, if the vengeance of Mr. Falkland +should prompt him to pursue me; and I did not doubt, among the +multiplied resources of the metropolis, to find something which should +suggest to me an eligible mode of disposing of my person and industry. I +reserved Mr. Forester in my arrangement, as a last resource, not to be +called forth unless for immediate protection from the hand of +persecution and power. I was destitute of that experience of the world, +which can alone render us fertile in resources, or enable us to +institute a just comparison between the resources that offer themselves. +I was like the fascinated animal, that is seized with the most terrible +apprehensions, at the same time that he is incapable of adequately +considering for his own safety. + +The mode of my proceeding being digested, I traced, with a cheerful +heart, the unfrequented path it was now necessary for me to pursue. The +night was gloomy, and it drizzled with rain. But these were +circumstances I had scarcely the power to perceive; all was sunshine and +joy within me. I hardly felt the ground; I repeated to myself a thousand +times, "I am free. What concern have I with danger and alarm? I feel +that I am free; I feel that I will continue so. What power is able to +hold in chains a mind ardent and determined? What power can cause that +man to die, whose whole soul commands him to continue to live?" I looked +back with abhorrence to the subjection in which I had been held. I did +not hate the author of my misfortunes--truth and justice acquit me of +that; I rather pitied the hard destiny to which he seemed condemned. But +I thought with unspeakable loathing of those errors, in consequence of +which every man is fated to be, more or less, the tyrant or the slave. I +was astonished at the folly of my species, that they did not rise up as +one man, and shake off chains so ignominious, and misery so +insupportable. So far as related to myself, I resolved--and this +resolution has never been entirety forgotten by me--to hold myself +disengaged from this odious scene, and never fill the part either of the +oppressor or the sufferer. My mind continued in this enthusiastical +state, full of confidence, and accessible only to such a portion of fear +as served rather to keep up a state of pleasurable emotion than to +generate anguish and distress, during the whole of this nocturnal +expedition. After a walk of three hours, I arrived, without accident, at +the village from which I hoped to have taken my passage for the +metropolis. At this early hour every thing was quiet; no sound of any +thing human saluted my ear. It was with difficulty that I gained +admittance into the yard of the inn, where I found a single ostler +taking care of some horses. From him I received the unwelcome tidings, +that the coach was not expected till six o'clock in the morning of the +day after to-morrow, its route through that town recurring only three +times a week. + +This intelligence gave the first check to the rapturous inebriation by +which my mind had been possessed from the moment I quitted the +habitation of Mr. Falkland. The whole of my fortune in ready cash +consisted of about eleven guineas. I had about fifty more, that had +fallen to me from the disposal of my property at the death of my father; +but that was so vested as to preclude it from immediate use, and I even +doubted whether it would not be found better ultimately to resign it, +than, by claiming it, to risk the furnishing a clew to what I most of +all dreaded, the persecution of Mr. Falkland. There was nothing I so +ardently desired as the annihilation of all future intercourse between +us, that he should not know there was such a person on the earth as +myself, and that I should never more hear the repetition of a name which +had been so fatal to my peace. + +Thus circumstanced, I conceived frugality to be an object by no means +unworthy of my attention, unable as I was to prognosticate what +discouragements and delays might present themselves to the +accomplishment of my wishes, after my arrival in London. For this and +other reasons, I determined to adhere to my design of travelling by the +stage; it only remaining for me to consider in what manner I should +prevent the eventful delay of twenty-four hours from becoming, by any +untoward event, a source of new calamity. It was by no means advisable +to remain in the village where I now was during this interval; nor did I +even think proper to employ it, in proceeding on foot along the great +road. I therefore decided upon making a circuit, the direction of which +should seem at first extremely wide of my intended route, and then, +suddenly taking a different inclination, should enable me to arrive by +the close of day at a market-town twelve miles nearer to the metropolis. + +Having fixed the economy of the day, and persuaded myself that it was +the best which, under the circumstances, could be adopted, I dismissed, +for the most part, all further anxieties from my mind, and eagerly +yielded myself up to the different amusements that arose. I rested and +went forward at the impulse of the moment. At one time I reclined upon a +bank immersed in contemplation, and at another exerted myself to analyse +the prospects which succeeded each other. The haziness of the morning +was followed by a spirit-stirring and beautiful day. With the ductility +so characteristic of a youthful mind, I forgot the anguish which had +lately been my continual guest, and occupied myself entirely in dreams +of future novelty and felicity. I scarcely ever, in the whole course of +my existence, spent a day of more various or exquisite gratification. It +furnished a strong, and perhaps not an unsalutary contrast, to the +terrors which had preceded, and the dreadful scenes that awaited me. + +In the evening I arrived at the place of my destination, and enquired +for the inn at which the coach was accustomed to call. A circumstance +however had previously excited my attention, and reproduced in me a +state of alarm. + +Though it was already dark before I reached the town, my observation +had been attracted by a man, who passed me on horseback in the opposite +direction, about half a mile on the other side of the town. There was an +inquisitiveness in his gesture that I did not like; and, as far as I +could discern his figure, I pronounced him an ill-looking man. He had +not passed me more than two minutes before I heard the sound of a horse +advancing slowly behind me. These circumstances impressed some degree of +uneasy sensation upon my mind. I first mended my pace; and, this not +appearing to answer the purpose, I afterwards loitered, that the +horseman might pass me. He did so; and, as I glanced at him, I thought I +saw that it was the same man. He now put his horse into a trot, and +entered the town. I followed; and it was not long before I perceived him +at the door of an alehouse, drinking a mug of beer. This however the +darkness prevented me from discovering, till I was in a manner upon him. +I pushed forward, and saw him no more, till, as I entered the yard of +the inn where I intended to sleep, the same man suddenly rode up to me, +and asked if my name were Williams. + +This adventure, _while it had been passing_, expelled the gaiety of my +mind, and filled me with anxiety. The apprehension however that I felt, +appeared to me groundless: if I were pursued, I took it for granted it +would be by some of Mr. Falkland's people, and not by a stranger. The +darkness took from me some of the simplest expedients of precaution. I +determined at least to proceed to the inn, and make the necessary +enquiries. + +I no sooner heard the sound of the horse as I entered the yard, and the +question proposed to me by the rider, than the dreadful certainty of +what I feared instantly took possession of my mind. Every incident +connected with my late abhorred situation was calculated to impress me +with the deepest alarm. My first thought was, to betake myself to the +fields, and trust to the swiftness of my flight for safety. But this was +scarcely practicable: I remarked that my enemy was alone; and I believed +that, man to man, I might reasonably hope to get the better of him, +either by the firmness of my determination, or the subtlety of my +invention. + +Thus resolved, I replied in an impetuous and peremptory tone, that I was +the man he took me for; adding, "I guess your errand; but it is to no +purpose. You come to conduct me back to Falkland House; but no force +shall ever drag me to that place alive. I have not taken my resolution +without strong reasons; and all the world shall not persuade me to alter +it. I am an Englishman, and it is the privilege of an Englishman to be +sole judge and master of his own actions." + +"You are in the devil of a hurry," replied the man, "to guess my +intentions, and tell your own. But your guess is right; and mayhap you +may have reason to be thankful that my errand is not something worse. +Sure enough the squire expects you;--but I have a letter, and when you +have read that, I suppose you will come off a little of your stoutness. +If that does not answer, it will then be time to think what is to be +done next." + +Thus saying, he gave me his letter, which was from Mr. Forester, whom, +as he told me, he had left at Mr. Falkland's house. I went into a room +of the inn for the purpose of reading it, and was followed by the +bearer. The letter was as follows:-- + +WILLIAMS, + +"My brother Falkland has sent the bearer in pursuit of you. He expects +that, if found, you will return with him: I expect it too. It is of the +utmost consequence to your future honour and character. After reading +these lines, if you are a villain and a rascal, you will perhaps +endeavour to fly; if your conscience tells you, you are innocent, you +will, out of all doubt, come back. Show me then whether I have been your +dupe: and, while I was won over by your seeming ingenuousness, have +suffered myself to be made the tool of a designing knave. If you come, I +pledge myself that, if you clear your reputation, you shall not only be +free to go wherever you please, but shall receive every assistance in my +power to give. Remember, I engage for nothing further than that. + +"VALENTINE FORESTER." + +What a letter was this! To a mind like mine, glowing with the love of +virtue, such an address was strong enough to draw the person to whom it +was addressed from one end of the earth to the other. My mind was full +of confidence and energy. I felt my own innocence, and was determined to +assert it. I was willing to be driven out a fugitive; I even rejoiced in +my escape, and cheerfully went out into the world destitute of every +provision, and depending for my future prospects upon my own ingenuity. + +Thus much, said I, Falkland! you may do. Dispose of me as you please +with respect to the goods of fortune; but you shall neither make prize +of my liberty, nor sully the whiteness of my name. I repassed in my +thoughts every memorable incident that had happened to me under his +roof. I could recollect nothing, except the affair of the mysterious +trunk, out of which the shadow of a criminal accusation could be +extorted. In that instance my conduct had been highly reprehensible, and +I had never looked back upon it without remorse and self-condemnation. +But I did not believe that it was of the nature of those actions which +can be brought under legal censure. I could still less persuade myself +that Mr. Falkland, who shuddered at the very possibility of detection, +and who considered himself as completely in my power, would dare to +bring forward a subject so closely connected with the internal agony of +his soul. In a word, the more I reflected on the phrases of Mr. +Forester's billet, the less could I imagine the nature of those scenes +to which they were to serve as a prelude. + +The inscrutableness however of the mystery they contained, did not +suffice to overwhelm my courage. My mind seemed to undergo an entire +revolution. Timid and embarrassed as I had felt myself, when I regarded +Mr. Falkland as my clandestine and domestic foe, I now conceived that +the case was entirely altered. "Meet me," said I, "as an open accuser: +if we must contend, let us contend in the face of day; and then, +unparalleled as your resources may be, I will not fear you." Innocence +and guilt were, in my apprehension, the things in the whole world the +most opposite to each other. I would not suffer myself to believe, that +the former could be confounded with the latter, unless the innocent man +first allowed himself to be subdued in mind, before he was defrauded of +the good opinion of mankind. Virtue rising superior to every calamity, +defeating by a plain unvarnished tale all the stratagems of Vice, and +throwing back upon her adversary the confusion with which he had hoped +to overwhelm her, was one of the favourite subjects of my youthful +reveries. I determined never to prove an instrument of destruction to +Mr. Falkland; but I was not less resolute to obtain justice to myself. + +The issue of all these confident hopes I shall immediately have +occasion to relate. It was thus, with the most generous and undoubting +spirit, that I rushed upon irretrievable ruin. + +"Friend," said I to the bearer, after a considerable interval of +silence, "you are right. This is, indeed, an extraordinary letter you +have brought me; but it answers its purpose. I will certainly go with +you now, whatever be the consequence. No person shall ever impute blame +to me, so long as I have it in my power to clear myself." + +I felt, in the circumstances in which I was placed by Mr. Forester's +letter, not merely a willingness, but an alacrity and impatience, to +return. We procured a second horse. We proceeded on our journey in +silence. My mind was occupied again in endeavouring to account for Mr. +Forester's letter. I knew the inflexibility and sternness of Mr. +Falkland's mind in accomplishing the purposes he had at heart; but I +also knew that every virtuous and magnanimous principle was congenial to +his character. + +When we arrived, midnight was already past, and we were obliged to waken +one of the servants to give us admittance. I found that Mr. Forester had +left a message for me, in consideration of the possibility of my arrival +during the night, directing me immediately to go to bed, and to take +care that I did not come weary and exhausted to the business of the +following day. I endeavoured to take his advice; but my slumbers were +unrefreshing and disturbed. I suffered however no reduction of courage: +the singularity of my situation, my conjectures with respect to the +present, my eagerness for the future, did not allow me to sink into a +languid and inactive state. + +Next morning the first person I saw was Mr. Forester. He told me that +he did not yet know what Mr. Falkland had to allege against me, for that +he had refused to know. He had arrived at the house of his brother by +appointment on the preceding day to settle some indispensable business, +his intention having been to depart the moment the business was +finished, as he knew that conduct on his part would be most agreeable to +Mr. Falkland. But he was no sooner come, than he found the whole house +in confusion, the alarm of my elopement having been given a few hours +before. Mr. Falkland had despatched servants in all directions in +pursuit of me; and the servant from the market-town arrived at the same +moment with Mr. Forester, with intelligence that a person answering the +description he gave, had been there very early in the morning enquiring +respecting the stage to London. + +Mr. Falkland seemed extremely disturbed at this information, and +exclaimed on me with acrimony, as an unthankful and unnatural villain. + +Mr. Forester replied, "Have more command of yourself, sir! Villain is a +serious appellation, and must not be trifled with. Englishmen are free; +and no man is to be charged with villainy, because he changes one source +of subsistence for another." + +Mr. Falkland shook his head, and with a smile, expressive of acute +sensibility, said, "Brother, brother, you are the dupe of his art. I +always considered him with an eye of suspicion, and was aware of his +depravity. But I have just discovered--" + +"Stop, sir!" interrupted Mr. Forester. "I own I thought that, in a +moment of acrimony, you might be employing harsh epithets in a sort of +random style. But if you have a serious accusation to state, we must not +be told of that, till it is known whether the lad is within reach of a +hearing. I am indifferent myself about the good opinion of others. It is +what the world bestows and retracts with so little thought, that I can +make no account of its decision. But that does not authorise me lightly +to entertain an ill opinion of another. The slenderest allowance I think +I can make to such as I consign to be the example and terror of their +species, is that of being heard in their own defence. It is a wise +principle that requires the judge to come into court uninformed of the +merits of the cause he is to try; and to that principle I am determined +to conform as an individual. I shall always think it right to be severe +and inflexible in my treatment of offenders; but the severity I exercise +in the sequel, must be accompanied with impartiality and caution in what +is preliminary." + +While Mr. Forester related to me these particulars, he observed me ready +to break out into some of the expressions which the narrative suggested; +but he would not suffer me to speak. "No," said he; "I would not hear +Mr. Falkland against you; and I cannot hear you in your defence. I come +to you at present to speak, and not to hear. I thought it right to warn +you of your danger, but I have nothing more to do now. Reserve what you +have to say to the proper time. Make the best story you can for +yourself--true, if truth, as I hope, will serve your purpose; but, if +not, the most plausible and ingenious you can invent. That is what +self-defence requires from every man, where, as it always happens to a +man upon his trial, he has the whole world against him, and has his own +battle to fight against the world. Farewell; and God send you a good +deliverance! If Mr. Falkland's accusation, whatever it be, shall appear +premature, depend upon having me more zealously your friend than ever. +If not, this is the last act of friendship you will ever receive from +me!" + +It may be believed that this address, so singular, so solemn, so big +with conditional menace, did not greatly tend to encourage me. I was +totally ignorant of the charge to be advanced against me; and not a +little astonished, when it was in my power to be in the most formidable +degree the accuser of Mr. Falkland, to find the principles of equity so +completely reversed, as for the innocent but instructed individual to be +the party accused and suffering, instead of having, as was natural, the +real criminal at his mercy. I was still more astonished at the +superhuman power Mr. Falkland seemed to possess, of bringing the object +of his persecution within the sphere of his authority; a reflection +attended with some check to that eagerness and boldness of spirit, which +now constituted the ruling passion of my mind. + +But this was no time for meditation. To the sufferer the course of +events is taken out of his direction, and he is hurried along with an +irresistible force, without finding it within the compass of his efforts +to check their rapidity. I was allowed only a short time to recollect +myself, when my trial commenced. I was conducted to the library, where I +had passed so many happy and so many contemplative hours, and found +there Mr. Forester and three or four of the servants already assembled, +in expectation of me and my accuser. Every thing was calculated to +suggest to me that I must trust only in the justice of the parties +concerned, and had nothing to hope from their indulgence. Mr. Falkland +entered at one door, almost as soon as I entered at the other. + + + + +CHAPTER X. + + +He began: "It has been the principle of my life, never to inflict a +wilful injury upon any thing that lives; I need not express my regret, +when I find myself obliged to be the promulgator of a criminal charge. +How gladly would I pass unnoticed the evil I have sustained; but I owe +it to society to detect an offender, and prevent other men from being +imposed upon, as I have been, by an appearance of integrity." + +"It would be better," interrupted Mr. Forester "to speak directly to the +point. We ought not, though unwarily, by apologising for ourselves, to +create at such a time a prejudice against an individual, against whom a +criminal accusation will always be prejudice enough." + +"I strongly suspect," continued Mr. Falkland, "this young man, who has +been peculiarly the object of my kindness, of having robbed me to a +considerable amount." + +"What," replied Mr. Forester, "are the grounds of your suspicion?" + +"The first of them is the actual loss I have sustained, in notes, +jewels, and plate. I have missed bank-notes to the amount of nine +hundred pounds, three gold repeaters of considerable value, a complete +set of diamonds, the property of my late mother, and several other +articles." + +"And why," continued my arbitrator, astonishment grief, and a desire to +retain his self-possession, strong contending in his countenance and +voice, "do you fix on this young man as the instrument of the +depredation?" + +"I found him, on my coming home, upon the day when every thing was in +disorder from the alarm of fire, in the very act of quitting the private +apartment where these articles were deposited. He was confounded at +seeing me, and hastened to withdraw as soon as he possibly could." + +"Did you say nothing to him--take no notice of the confusion your sudden +appearance produced?" + +"I asked what was his errand in that place. He was at first so terrified +and overcome, that he could not answer me. Afterwards, with a good deal +of faltering, he said that, when all the servants were engaged in +endeavouring to save the most valuable part of my property, he had come +hither with the same view; but that he had as yet removed nothing." + +"Did you immediately examine to see that every thing was safe?" + +"No. I was accustomed to confide in his honesty, and I was suddenly +called away, in the present instance, to attend to the increasing +progress of the flames. I therefore only took out the key from the door +of the apartment, having first locked it, and, putting it in my pocket, +hastened to go where my presence seemed indispensably necessary." + +"How long was it before you missed your property?" + +"The same evening. The hurry of the scene had driven the circumstance +entirely out of my mind, till, going by accident near the apartment, the +whole affair, together with the singular and equivocal behaviour of +Williams, rushed at once upon my recollection. I immediately entered, +examined the trunk in which these things were contained, and, to my +astonishment, found the locks broken, and the property gone." + +"What steps did you take upon this discovery?" + +"I sent for Williams, and talked to him very seriously upon the +subject. But he had now perfectly recovered his self-command, and calmly +and stoutly denied all knowledge of the matter. I urged him with the +enormousness of the offence, but I made no impression. He did not +discover either the surprise and indignation one would have expected +from a person entirely innocent, or the uneasiness that generally +attends upon guilt. He was rather silent and reserved. I then informed +him, that I should proceed in a manner different from what he might +perhaps expect. I would not, as is too frequent in such cases, make a +general search; for I had rather lose my property for ever without +redress, than expose a multitude of innocent persons to anxiety and +injustice. My suspicion, for the present, unavoidably fixed upon him. +But, in a matter of so great consequence, I was determined not to act +upon suspicion. I would neither incur the possibility of ruining him, +being innocent, nor be the instrument of exposing others to his +depredations, if guilty. I should therefore merely insist upon his +continuing in my service. He might depend upon it he should be well +watched, and I trusted the whole truth would eventually appear. Since he +avoided confession now, I advised him to consider how far it was likely +he would come off with impunity at last. This I determined on, that the +moment he attempted an escape, I would consider that as an indication of +guilt, and proceed accordingly." + +"What circumstances have occurred from that time to the present?" + +"None upon which I can infer a certainty of guilt; several that agree to +favour a suspicion. From that time Williams was perpetually uneasy in +his situation, always desirous, as it now appears, to escape, but +afraid to adopt such a measure without certain precautions. It was not +long after, that you, Mr. Forester, became my visitor. I observed, with +dissatisfaction, the growing intercourse between you, reflecting on the +equivocalness of his character, and the attempt he would probably make +to render you the dupe of his hypocrisy. I accordingly threatened him +severely; and I believe you observed the change that presently after +occurred in his behaviour with relation to you." + +"I did, and it appeared at that time mysterious and extraordinary." + +"Some time after, as you well know, a rencounter took place between you, +whether accidental or intentional on his part I am not able to say, when +he confessed to you the uneasiness of his mind, without discovering the +cause, and openly proposed to you to assist him in his flight, and +stand, in case of necessity, between him and my resentment. You offered, +it seems, to take him into your service; but nothing, as he +acknowledged, would answer his purpose, that did not place his retreat +wholly out of my power to discover." + +"Did it not appear extraordinary to you, that he should hope for any +effectual protection from me, while it remained perpetually in your +power to satisfy me of his unworthiness?" + +"Perhaps he had hopes that I should not proceed to that step, at least +so long as the place of his retreat should be unknown to me, and of +consequence the event of my proceeding dubious. Perhaps he confided in +his own powers, which are far from contemptible, to construct a +plausible tale, especially as he had taken care to have the first +impression in his favour. After all, this protection, on your part, was +merely reserved in case all other expedients failed. He does not appear +to have had any other sentiment upon the subject, than that, if he were +defeated in his projects for placing himself beyond the reach of +justice, it was better to have bespoken a place in your patronage than +to be destitute of every resource." + +Mr. Falkland having thus finished his evidence, called upon Robert, the +valet, to confirm the part of it which related to the day of the fire. + +Robert stated, that he happened to be coming through the library that +day, a few minutes after Mr. Falkland's being brought home by the sight +of the fire; that he had found me standing there with every mark of +perturbation and fright; that he could not help stopping to notice it; +that he had spoken to me two or three times before he could obtain an +answer; and that all he could get from me at last was, that I was the +most miserable creature alive. + +He further said, that in the evening of the same day Mr. Falkland called +him into the private apartment adjoining to the library, and bid him +bring a hammer and some nails. He then showed him a trunk standing in +the apartment with its locks and fastening broken, and ordered him to +observe and remember what he saw, but not to mention it to any one. +Robert did not at that time know what Mr. Falkland intended by these +directions, which were given in a manner uncommonly solemn and +significant; but he entertained no doubt, that the fastenings were +broken and wrenched by the application of a chisel or such-like +instrument, with the intention of forcibly opening the trunk. + +Mr. Forester observed upon this evidence, that as much of it as related +to the day of the fire seemed indeed to afford powerful reasons for +suspicion; and that the circumstances that had occurred since strangely +concurred to fortify that suspicion. Meantime, that nothing proper to +be done might be omitted, he asked whether in my flight I had removed my +boxes, to see whether by that means any trace could be discovered to +confirm the imputation. Mr. Falkland treated this suggestion slightly, +saying, that if I were the thief, I had no doubt taken the precaution to +obviate so palpable a means of detection. To this Mr. Forester only +replied, that conjecture, however skilfully formed, was not always +realised in the actions and behaviour of mankind; and ordered that my +boxes and trunks, if found, should be brought into the library. I +listened to this suggestion with pleasure; and, uneasy and confounded as +I was at the appearances combined against me, I trusted in this appeal +to give a new face to my cause. I was eager to declare the place where +my property was deposited; and the servants, guided by my direction, +presently produced what was enquired for. + +The two boxes that were first opened, contained nothing to confirm the +accusation against me; in the third were found a watch and several +jewels, that were immediately known to be the property of Mr. Falkland. +The production of this seemingly decisive evidence excited emotions of +astonishment and concern; but no person's astonishment appeared to be +greater than that of Mr. Falkland. That I should have left the stolen +goods behind me, would of itself have appeared incredible; but when it +was considered what a secure place of concealment I had found for them, +the wonder diminished; and Mr. Forester observed, that it was by no +means impossible I might conceive it easier to obtain possession of them +afterwards, than to remove them at the period of my precipitate flight. + +Here however I thought it necessary to interfere. I fervently urged my +right to a fair and impartial construction. I asked Mr. Forester, +whether it were probable, if I had stolen these things, that I should +not have contrived, at least to remove them along with me? And again, +whether, if I had been conscious they would he found among my property, +I should myself have indicated the place where I had concealed it? + +The insinuation I conveyed against Mr. Forester's impartiality +overspread his whole countenance, for an instant, with the flush of +anger. + +"Impartiality, young man! Yes, be sure, from me you shall experience an +impartial treatment! God send that may answer your purpose! Presently +you shall be heard at full in your own defence. + +"You expect us to believe you innocent, because you did not remove these +things along with you. The money is removed. Where, sir, is that? We +cannot answer for the inconsistences and oversights of any human mind, +and, least of all, if that mind should appear to be disturbed with the +consciousness of guilt. + +"You observe that it was by your own direction these boxes and trunks +have been found: that is indeed extraordinary. It appears little less +than infatuation. But to what purpose appeal to probabilities and +conjecture, in the face of incontestable facts? There, sir, are the +boxes: you alone knew where they were to be found; you alone had the +keys: tell us then how this watch and these jewels came to be contained +in them?" + +I was silent. + +To the rest of the persons present I seemed to be merely the subject of +detection; but in reality I was, of all the spectators, that individual +who was most at a loss to conceive, through every stage of the scene, +what, would come next, and who listened to every word that was uttered +with the most uncontrollable amazement. Amazement however alternately +yielded to indignation and horror. At first I could not refrain from +repeatedly attempting to interrupt; but I was checked in these attempts +by Mr. Forester; and I presently felt how necessary it was to my future +peace, that I should collect the whole energy of my mind to repel the +charge, and assert my innocence. + +Every thing being now produced that could be produced against me, Mr. +Forester turned to me with a look of concern and pity, and told me that +now was the time, if I chose to allege any thing in my defence. In reply +to this invitation, I spoke nearly as follows:-- + +"I am innocent. It is in vain that circumstances are accumulated against +me; there is not a person upon earth less capable than I of the things +of which I am accused. I appeal to my heart--I appeal to my looks--I +appeal to every sentiment my tongue ever uttered." + +I could perceive that the fervour with which I spoke made some +impression upon every one that heard me. But in a moment their eyes were +turned upon the property that lay before them, and their countenances +changed. I proceeded:-- + +"One thing more I must aver;--Mr. Falkland is not deceived; he perfectly +knows that I am innocent." + +I had no sooner uttered these words, than an involuntary cry of +indignation burst from every person in the room. Mr. Forester turned to +me with a look of extreme severity, and said-- + +"Young man, consider well what you are doing! It is the privilege of the +party accused to say whatever he thinks proper; and I will take care +that you shall enjoy that privilege in its utmost extent. But do you +think it will conduce in any respect to your benefit, to throw out such +insolent and intolerable insinuations?" + +"I thank you most sincerely," replied I, "for your caution; but I well +know what it is I am doing. I make this declaration, not merely because +it is solemnly true, but because it is inseparably connected with my +vindication. I am the party accused, and I shall be told that I am not +to be believed in my own defence. I can produce no other witnesses of my +innocence; I therefore call upon Mr. Falkland to be my evidence. I ask +him-- + +"Did you never boast to me in private of your power to ruin me? Did you +never say that, if once I brought on myself the weight of your +displeasure, my fall should be irreparable? Did you not tell me that, +though I should prepare in that case a tale however plausible or however +true, you would take care that the whole world should execrate me as an +impostor? Were not those your very words? Did you not add, that my +innocence should be of no service to me, and that you laughed at so +feeble a defence? I ask you further,--Did you not receive a letter from +me the morning of the day on which I departed, requesting your consent +to my departure? Should I have done that if my flight had been that of a +thief? I challenge any man to reconcile the expressions of that letter +with this accusation. Should I have begun with stating that I had +conceived a desire to quit your service, if my desire and the reasons +for it, had been of the nature that is now alleged? Should I have dared +to ask for what reason I was thus subjected to an eternal penance?" + +Saying this, I took out a copy of my letter, and laid it open upon the +table. + +Mr. Falkland returned no immediate answer to my interrogations. Mr. +Forester turned to him, and said. + +"Well, sir, what is your reply to this challenge of your servant?" + +Mr. Falkland answered, "Such a mode of defence scarcely calls for a +reply. But I answer, I held no such conversation; I never used such +words; I received no such letter. Surely it is no sufficient refutation +of a criminal charge, that the criminal repels what is alleged against +him with volubility of speech, and intrepidity of manner." + +Mr. Forester then turned to me: "If," said he, "you trust your +vindication to the plausibility of your tale, you must take care to +render it consistent and complete. You have not told us what was the +cause of the confusion and anxiety in which Robert professes to have +found you, why you were so impatient to quit the service of Mr. +Falkland, or how you account for certain articles of his property being +found in your possession." + +"All that, sir," answered I, "is true. There are certain parts of my +story that I have not told. If they were told, they would not conduce to +my disadvantage, and they would make the present accusation appear still +more astonishing. But I cannot, as yet at least, prevail upon myself to +tell them. Is it necessary to give any particular and precise reasons +why I should wish to change the place of my residence? You all of you +know the unfortunate state of Mr. Falkland's mind. You know the +sternness, reservedness, and distance of his manners. If I had no other +reasons, surely it would afford small presumption of criminality that I +should wish to change his service for another. + +"The question of how these articles of Mr. Falkland's property came to +be found in my possession, is more material. It is a question I am +wholly unable to answer. Their being found there, was at least as +unexpected to me as to any one of the persons now present. I only know +that, as I have the most perfect assurance of Mr. Falkland's being +conscious of my innocence--for, observe! I do not shrink from that +assertion; I reiterate it with new confidence--I therefore firmly and +from my soul believe, that their being there is of Mr. Falkland's +contrivance." + +I no sooner said this, than I was again interrupted by an involuntary +exclamation from every one present. They looked at me with furious +glances, as if they could have torn me to pieces. I proceeded:-- + +"I have now answered every thing that is alleged against me. + +"Mr. Forester, you are a lover of justice; I conjure you not to violate +it in my person. You are a man of penetration; look at me! do you see +any of the marks of guilt? Recollect all that has ever passed under your +observation; is it compatible with a mind capable of what is now alleged +against me? Could a real criminal have shown himself so unabashed, +composed, and firm as I have now done? + +"Fellow-servants! Mr. Falkland is a man of rank and fortune; he is your +master. I am a poor country lad, without a friend in the world. That is +a ground of real difference to a certain extent; but it is not a +sufficient ground for the subversion of justice. Remember, that I am in +a situation that is not to be trifled with; that a decision given +against me now, in a case in which I solemnly assure you I am innocent, +will for ever deprive me of reputation and peace of mind, combine the +whole world in a league against me, and determine perhaps upon my +liberty and my life. If you believe--if you see--if you know, that I am +innocent, speak for me. Do not suffer a pusillanimous timidity to +prevent you from saving a fellow-creature from destruction, who does not +deserve to have a human being for his enemy. Why have we the power of +speech, but to communicate our thoughts? I will never believe that a +man, conscious of innocence, cannot make other men perceive that he has +that thought. Do not you feel that my whole heart tells me. I am not +guilty of what is imputed to me? + +"To you, Mr. Falkland, I have nothing to say: I know you, and know that +you are impenetrable. At the very moment that you are urging such odious +charges against me, you admire my resolution and forbearance. But I have +nothing to hope from you. You can look upon my ruin without pity or +remorse. I am most unfortunate indeed in having to do with such an +adversary. You oblige me to say ill things of you; but I appeal to your +own heart, whether my language is that of exaggeration or revenge." + +Every thing that could be alleged on either side being now concluded, +Mr. Forester undertook to make some remarks upon the whole. + +"Williams," said he, "the charge against you is heavy; the direct +evidence strong; the corroborating circumstances numerous and striking. +I grant that you have shown considerable dexterity in your answers; but +you will learn, young man, to your cost, that dexterity, however +powerful it may be in certain cases, will avail little against the +stubbornness of truth. It is fortunate for mankind that the empire of +talents has its limitations, and that it is not in the power of +ingenuity to subvert the distinctions of right and wrong. Take my word +for it, that the true merits of the case against you will be too strong +for sophistry to overturn; that justice will prevail, and impotent +malice be defeated. + +"To you, Mr. Falkland, society is obliged for having placed this black +affair in its true light. Do not suffer the malignant aspersions of the +criminal to give you uneasiness. Depend upon it that they will be found +of no weight I have no doubt that your character, in the judgment of +every person that has heard them, stands higher than ever. We feel for +your misfortune, in being obliged to hear such calumnies from a person +who has injured you so grossly. But you must be considered in that +respect as a martyr in the public cause. The purity of your motives and +dispositions is beyond the reach of malice; and truth and equity will +not fail to award, to your calumniator infamy, and to you the love and +approbation of mankind. + +"I have now told you, Williams, what I think of your case. But I have no +right to assume to be your ultimate judge. Desperate as it appears to +me, I will give you one piece of advice, as if I were retained as a +counsel to assist you. Leave out of it whatever tends to the +disadvantage of Mr. Falkland. Defend yourself as well as you can, but do +not attack your master. It is your business to create in those who hear +you a prepossession in your favour. But the recrimination you have been +now practising, will always create indignation. Dishonesty will admit of +some palliation. The deliberate malice you have now been showing is a +thousand times more atrocious. It proves you to have the mind of a +demon, rather than of a felon. Wherever you shall repeat it, those who +hear you will pronounce you guilty upon that, even if the proper +evidence against you were glaringly defective. If therefore you would +consult your interest, which seems to be your only consideration, it is +incumbent upon you by all means immediately to retract that. If you +desire to be believed honest, you must in the first place show that you +have a due sense of merit in others. You cannot better serve your cause +than by begging pardon of your master, and doing homage to rectitude and +worth, even when they are employed in vengeance against you." + +It is easy to conceive that my mind sustained an extreme shock from the +decision of Mr. Forester; but his call upon me to retract and humble +myself before my accuser penetrated my whole soul with indignation. I +answered:-- + +"I have already told you I am innocent. I believe that I could not +endure the effort of inventing a plausible defence, if it were +otherwise. You have just affirmed that it is not in the power of +ingenuity to subvert the distinctions of right and wrong, and in that +very instant I find them subverted. This is indeed to me a very awful +moment. New to the world, I know nothing of its affairs but what has +reached me by rumour, or is recorded in books. I have come into it with +all the ardour and confidence inseparable from my years. In every +fellow-being I expected to find a friend. I am unpractised in its wiles, +and have even no acquaintance with its injustice. I have done nothing to +deserve the animosity of mankind; but, if I may judge from the present +scene, I am henceforth to be deprived of the benefits of integrity and +honour. I am to forfeit the friendship of every one I have hitherto +known, and to be precluded from the power of acquiring that of others. I +must therefore be reduced to derive my satisfaction from myself. Depend +upon it, I will not begin that career by dishonourable concessions. If I +am to despair of the good-will of other men, I will at least maintain +the independence of my own mind. Mr. Falkland is my implacable enemy. +Whatever may be his merits in other respects, he is acting towards me +without humanity, without remorse, and without principle. Do you think I +will ever make submissions to a man by whom I am thus treated, that I +will fall down at the feet of one who is to me a devil, or kiss the hand +that is red with my blood?" + +"In that respect," answered Mr. Forester, "do as you shall think +proper. I must confess that your firmness and consistency astonish me. +They add something to what I had conceived of human powers. Perhaps you +have chosen the part which, all things considered, may serve your +purpose best; though I think more moderation would be more conciliating. +The exterior of innocence will, I grant, stagger the persons who may +have the direction of your fate, but it will never be able to prevail +against plain and incontrovertible facts. But I have done with you. I +see in you a new instance of that abuse which is so generally made of +talents, the admiration of an undiscerning public. I regard you with +horror. All that remains is, that I should discharge my duty, in +consigning you, as a monster of depravity, to the justice of your +country." + +"No," rejoined Mr. Falkland, "to that I can never consent. I have put a +restraint upon myself thus far, because it was right that evidence and +enquiry should take their course. I have suppressed all my habits and +sentiments, because it seemed due to the public that hypocrisy should be +unmasked. But I can suffer this violence no longer. I have through my +whole life interfered to protect, not overbear, the sufferer; and I must +do so now. I feel not the smallest resentment of his impotent attacks +upon my character; I smile at their malice; and they make no diminution +in my benevolence to their author. Let him say what he pleases; he +cannot hurt me. It was proper that he should be brought to public shame, +that other people might not be deceived by him as we have been. But +there is no necessity for proceeding further; and I must insist upon it +that he be permitted to depart wherever he pleases. I am sorry that +public interest affords so gloomy a prospect for his future happiness." + +"Mr. Falkland," answered Mr. Forester, "these sentiments do honour to +your humanity; but I must not give way to them. They only serve to set +in a stronger light the venom of this serpent, this monster of +ingratitude, who first robs his benefactor, and then reviles him. Wretch +that you are, will nothing move you? Are you inaccessible to remorse? +Are you not struck to the heart with the unmerited goodness of your +master? Vile calumniator! you are the abhorrence of nature, the +opprobrium of the human species, and the earth can only be freed from an +insupportable burthen by your being exterminated! Recollect, sir, that +this monster, at the very moment that you are exercising such unexampled +forbearance in his behalf, has the presumption to charge you with +prosecuting a crime of which you know him to be innocent, nay, with +having conveyed the pretended stolen goods among his property, for the +express purpose of ruining him. By this unexampled villainy, he makes it +your duty to free the world from such a pest, and your interest to admit +no relaxing in your pursuit of him, lest the world should be persuaded +by your clemency to credit his vile insinuations." + +"I care not for the consequences," replied Mr. Falkland; "I will obey +the dictates of my own mind. I will never lend my assistance to the +reforming mankind by axes and gibbets. I am sure things will never be as +they ought, till honour, and not law, be the dictator of mankind, till +vice be taught to shrink before the resistless might of inborn dignity, +and not before the cold formality of statutes. If my calumniator were +worthy of my resentment, I would chastise him with my own sword, and not +that of the magistrate; but in the present case I smile at his malice, +and resolve to spare him, as the generous lord of the forest spares the +insect that would disturb his repose." + +"The language you now hold," said Mr. Forester, "is that of romance, and +not of reason. Yet I cannot but be struck with the contrast exhibited +before me, of the magnanimity of virtue, and the obstinate impenetrable +injustice of guilt. While your mind overflows with goodness, nothing can +touch the heart of this thrice-refined villain. I shall never forgive +myself for having once been entrapped by his detestable arts. This is no +time for us to settle the question between chivalry and law. I shall +therefore simply insist as a magistrate, having taken the evidence in +this felony, upon my right and duty of following the course of justice, +and committing the accused to the county jail." + +After some further contest Mr. Falkland, finding Mr. Forester obstinate +and impracticable, withdrew his opposition. Accordingly a proper officer +was summoned from the neighbouring village, a mittimus made out, and one +of Mr. Falkland's carriages prepared to conduct me to the place of +custody. It will easily be imagined that this sudden reverse was very +painfully felt by me. I looked round on the servants who had been the +spectators of my examination, but not one of them, either by word or +gesture, expressed compassion for my calamity. The robbery of which I +was accused appeared to them atrocious from its magnitude; and whatever +sparks of compassion might otherwise have sprung up in their ingenuous +and undisciplined minds, were totally obliterated by indignation at my +supposed profligacy in recriminating upon their worthy and excellent +master. My fate being already determined, and one of the servants +despatched for the officer, Mr. Forester and Mr. Falkland withdrew, and +left me in the custody of two others. + +One of these was the son of a farmer at no great distance, who had been +in habits of long-established intimacy with my late father. I was +willing accurately to discover the state of mind of those who had been +witnesses of this scene, and who had had some previous opportunity of +observing my character and manners. I, therefore, endeavoured to open a +conversation with him. "Well, my good Thomas," said I, in a querulous +tone, and with a hesitating manner, "am I not a most miserable +creature?" + +"Do not speak to me, Master Williams! You have given me a shock that I +shall not get the better of for one while. You were hatched by a hen, as +the saying is, but you came of the spawn of a cockatrice. I am glad to +my heart that honest farmer Williams is dead; your villainy would else +have made him curse the day that ever he was born." + +"Thomas, I am innocent! I swear by the great God that shall judge me +another day, I am innocent!" + +"Pray, do not swear! for goodness' sake, do not swear! your poor soul is +damned enough without that. For your sake, lad, I will never take any +body's word, nor trust to appearances, tho' it should be an angel. Lord +bless us! how smoothly you palavered it over, for all the world, as if +you had been as fair as a new-born babe! But it will not do; you will +never be able to persuade people that black is white. For my own part, I +have done with you. I loved you yesterday, all one as if you had been my +own brother. To-day I love you so well, that I would go ten miles with +all the pleasure in life to see you hanged." + +"Good God, Thomas! have you the heart? What a change! I call God to +witness, I have done nothing to deserve it! What a world do we live in!" + +"Hold your tongue, boy! It makes my very heart sick to hear you! I +would not lie a night under the same roof with you for all the world! I +should expect the house to fall and crush such wickedness! I admire that +the earth does not open and swallow you alive! It is poison so much as +to look at you! If you go on at this hardened rate, I believe from my +soul that the people you talk to will tear you to pieces, and you will +never live to come to the gallows. Oh, yes, you do well to pity +yourself; poor tender thing! that spit venom all round you like a toad, +and leave the very ground upon which you crawl infected with your +slime." + +Finding the person with whom I talked thus impenetrable to all I could +say, and considering that the advantage to be gained was small, even if +I could overcome his prepossession, I took his advice, and was silent. +It was not much longer before every thing was prepared for my departure, +and I was conducted to the same prison which had so lately enclosed the +wretched and innocent Hawkinses. They too had been the victims of Mr. +Falkland. He exhibited, upon a contracted scale indeed, but in which the +truth of delineation was faithfully sustained, a copy of what monarchs +are, who reckon among the instruments of their power prisons of state. + + + + +CHAPTER XI. + + +For my own part, I had never seen a prison, and, like the majority of my +brethren, had given myself little concern to enquire what was the +condition of those who committed offence against, or became obnoxious to +suspicion from, the community. Oh, how enviable is the most tottering +shed under which the labourer retires to rest, compared with the +residence of these walls! + +To me every thing was new,--the massy doors, the resounding locks, the +gloomy passages, the grated windows, and the characteristic looks of the +keepers, accustomed to reject every petition, and to steel their hearts +against feeling and pity. Curiosity, and a sense of my situation, +induced me to fix my eyes on the faces of these men; but in a few +minutes I drew them away with unconquerable loathing. It is impossible +to describe the sort of squalidness and filth with which these mansions +are distinguished. I have seen dirty faces in dirty apartments, which +have nevertheless borne the impression of health, and spoke carelessness +and levity rather than distress. But the dirt of a prison speaks sadness +to the heart, and appears to be already in a state of putridity and +infection. + +I was detained for more than an hour in the apartment of the keeper, one +turnkey after another coming in, that they might make themselves +familiar with my person. As I was already considered as guilty of felony +to a considerable amount, I underwent a rigorous search, and they took +from me a penknife, a pair of scissars, and that part of my money which +was in gold. It was debated whether or not these should be sealed up, to +be returned to me, as they said, as soon as I should be acquitted; and +had I not displayed an unexpected firmness of manner and vigour of +expostulation, such was probably the conduct that would have been +pursued. Having undergone these ceremonies, I was thrust into a +day-room, in which all the persons then under confinement for felony +were assembled, to the number of eleven. Each of them was too much +engaged in his own reflections, to take notice of me. Of these, two were +imprisoned for horse-stealing, and three for having stolen a sheep, one +for shop-lifting, one for coining, two for highway-robbery, and two for +burglary. + +The horse-stealers were engaged in a game at cards, which was presently +interrupted by a difference of opinion, attended with great +vociferation,--they calling upon one and another to decide it, to no +purpose; one paying no attention to their summons, and another leaving +them in the midst of their story, being no longer able to endure his own +internal anguish, in the midst of their mummery. + +It is a custom among thieves to constitute a sort of mock tribunal of +their own body, from whose decision every one is informed whether he +shall be acquitted, respited, or pardoned, as well as respecting the +supposed most skilful way of conducting his defence. One of the +housebreakers, who had already passed this ordeal, and was stalking up +and down the room with a forced bravery, exclaimed to his companion, +that he was as rich as the Duke of Bedford himself. He had five guineas +and a half, which was as much as he could possibly spend in the course +of the ensuing month; and what happened after that, it was Jack Ketch's +business to see to, not his. As he uttered these words, he threw himself +abruptly upon a bench that was near him, and seemed to be asleep in a +moment. But his sleep was uneasy and disturbed, his breathing was hard, +and, at intervals, had rather the nature of a groan. A young fellow from +the other side of the room came softly to the place where he lay, with a +large knife in his hand: and pressed the back of it with such violence +upon his neck, the head hanging over the side of the bench, that it was +not till after several efforts that he was able to rise. "Oh, Jack!" +cried this manual jester, "I had almost done your business for you!" The +other expressed no marks of resentment, but sullenly answered, "Damn +you, why did not you take the edge? It would have been the best thing +you have done this many a day!"[B] + +[Footnote B: An incident exactly similar to this was witnessed by a +friend of the author, a few years since, in a visit to the prison of +Newgate.] + +The case of one of the persons committed for highway-robbery was not a +little extraordinary. He was a common soldier of a most engaging +physiognomy, and two-and-twenty years of age. The prosecutor, who had +been robbed one evening, as he returned late from the alehouse, of the +sum of three shillings, swore positively to his person. The character of +the prisoner was such as has seldom been equalled. He had been ardent in +the pursuit of intellectual cultivation, and was accustomed to draw his +favourite amusement from the works of Virgil and Horace. The humbleness +of his situation, combined with his ardour for literature, only served +to give an inexpressible heightening to the interestingness of his +character. He was plain and unaffected; he assumed nothing; he was +capable, when occasion demanded, of firmness, but, in his ordinary +deportment, he seemed unarmed and unresisting, unsuspicious of guile in +others, as he was totally free from guile in himself. His integrity was +proverbially great. In one instance he had been intrusted by a lady to +convey a sum of a thousand pounds to a person at some miles distance: in +another, he was employed by a gentleman, during his absence, in the care +of his house and furniture, to the value of at least five times that +sum. His habits of thinking were strictly his own, full of justice, +simplicity, and wisdom. He from time to time earned money of his +officers, by his peculiar excellence in furbishing arms; but he declined +offers that had been made him to become a Serjeant or a corporal, +saying that he did not want money, and that in a new situation he should +have less leisure for study. He was equally constant in refusing +presents that were offered him by persons who had been struck with his +merit; not that he was under the influence of false delicacy and pride, +but that he had no inclination to accept that, the want of which he did +not feel to be an evil. This man died while I was in prison. I received +his last breath.[C] + +[Footnote C: A story extremely similar to this is to be found in the +Newgate Calendar, vol. i. p. 382.] + +The whole day I was obliged to spend in the company of these men, some +of them having really committed the actions laid to their charge, others +whom their ill fortune had rendered the victims of suspicion. The whole +was a scene of misery, such as nothing short of actual observation can +suggest to the mind. Some were noisy and obstreperous, endeavouring by a +false bravery to keep at bay the remembrance of their condition; while +others, incapable even of this effort, had the torment of their thoughts +aggravated by the perpetual noise and confusion that prevailed around +them. In the faces of those who assumed the most courage, you might +trace the furrows of anxious care and in the midst of their laboured +hilarity dreadful ideas would ever and anon intrude, convulsing their +features, and working every line into an expression of the keenest +agony. To these men the sun brought no return of joy. Day after day +rolled on, but their state was immutable. Existence was to them a scene +of invariable melancholy; every moment was a moment of anguish; yet did +they wish to prolong that moment, fearful that the coming period would +bring a severer fate. They thought of the past with insupportable +repentance, each man contented to give his right hand to have again the +choice of that peace and liberty, which he had unthinkingly bartered +away. We talk of instruments of torture; Englishmen take credit to +themselves for having banished the use of them from their happy shore! +Alas! he that has observed the secrets of a prison, well knows that +there is more torture in the lingering existence of a criminal, in the +silent intolerable minutes that he spends, than in the tangible misery +of whips and racks! + +Such were our days. At sunset our jailors appeared, and ordered each man +to come away, and be locked into his dungeon. It was a bitter +aggravation of our fate, to be under the arbitrary control of these +fellows. They felt no man's sorrow; they were of all men least capable +of any sort of feeling. They had a barbarous and sullen pleasure in +issuing their detested mandates, and observing the mournful reluctance +with which they were obeyed. Whatever they directed, it was in vain to +expostulate; fetters, and bread and water, were the sure consequences of +resistance. Their tyranny had no other limit than their own caprice. To +whom shall the unfortunate felon appeal? To what purpose complain, when +his complaints are sure to be received with incredulity? A tale of +mutiny and necessary precaution is the unfailing refuge of the keeper, +and this tale is an everlasting bar against redress. + +Our dungeons were cells, 7-1/2 feet by 6-1/2, below the surface of the +ground, damp, without window, light, or air, except from a few holes +worked for that purpose in the door. In some of these miserable +receptacles three persons were put to sleep together.[D] I was fortunate +enough to have one to myself. It was now the approach of winter. We +were not allowed to have candles, and, as I have already said, were +thrust in here at sunset, and not liberated till the returning day. This +was our situation for fourteen or fifteen hours out of the +four-and-twenty. I had never been accustomed to sleep more than six or +seven hours, and my inclination to sleep was now less than ever. Thus +was I reduced to spend half my day in this dreary abode, and in complete +darkness. This was no trifling aggravation of my lot. + +[Footnote D: See Howard on Prisons.] + +Among my melancholy reflections I tasked my memory, and counted over the +doors, the locks, the bolts, the chains, the massy walls, and grated +windows, that were between me and liberty. "These," said I, "are the +engines that tyranny sits down in cold and serious meditation to invent. +This is the empire that man exercises over man. Thus is a being, formed +to expatiate, to act, to smile, and enjoy, restricted and benumbed. How +great must be his depravity or heedlessness, who vindicates this scheme +for changing health and gaiety and serenity, into the wanness of a +dungeon, and the deep furrows of agony and despair!" + +"Thank God," exclaims the Englishman, "we have no Bastile! Thank God, +with us no man can be punished without a crime!" Unthinking wretch! Is +that a country of liberty, where thousands languish in dungeons and +fetters? Go, go, ignorant fool! and visit the scenes of our prisons! +witness their unwholesomeness, their filth, the tyranny of their +governors, the misery of their inmates! After that, show me the man +shameless enough to triumph, and say, England has no Bastile! Is there +any charge so frivolous, upon which men are not consigned to those +detested abodes? Is there any villainy that is not practised by justices +and prosecutors? But against all this perhaps you have been told there +is redress. Yes; a redress, that it is the consummation of insult so +much as to name! Where shall the poor wretch reduced to the last +despair, to whom acquittal perhaps comes just time enough to save him +from perishing,--where shall this man find leisure, and much less money, +to fee counsel and officers, and purchase the tedious dear-bought remedy +of the law? No; he is too happy to leave his dungeon, and the memory of +his dungeon, behind him; and the same tyranny and wanton oppression +become the inheritance of his successor. + +For myself, I looked round upon my walls, and forward upon the premature +death I had too much reason to expect: I consulted my own heart, that +whispered nothing but innocence; and I said, "This is society. This is +the object, the distribution of justice, which is the end of human +reason. For this sages have toiled, and midnight oil has been wasted. +This!" + +The reader will forgive this digression from the immediate subject of my +story. If it should be said these are general remarks, let it be +remembered that they are the dear-bought, result of experience. It is +from the fulness of a bursting heart that reproach thus flows to my pen. +These are not the declamations of a man desirous to be eloquent. I have +felt the iron of slavery grating upon my soul. + +I believed that misery, more pure than that which I now endured, had +never fallen to the lot of a human being. I recollected with +astonishment my puerile eagerness to be brought to the test, and have my +innocence examined. I execrated it, as the vilest and most insufferable +pedantry. I exclaimed, in the bitterness of my heart, "Of what value is +a fair fame? It is the jewel of men formed to be amused with baubles. +Without it, I might have had serenity of heart and cheerfulness of +occupation, peace, and liberty; why should I consign my happiness to +other men's arbitration? But, if a fair fame were of the most +inexpressible value, is this the method which common sense would +prescribe to retrieve it? The language which these institutions hold out +to the unfortunate is, 'Come, and be shut out from the light of day; be +the associate of those whom society has marked out for her abhorrence, +be the slave of jailers, be loaded with fetters; thus shall you be +cleared from every unworthy aspersion, and restored to reputation and +honour!' This is the consolation she affords to those whom malignity or +folly, private pique or unfounded positiveness, have, without the +smallest foundation, loaded with calumny." For myself, I felt my own +innocence; and I soon found, upon enquiry, that three fourths of those +who are regularly subjected to a similar treatment, are persons whom, +even with all the superciliousness and precipitation of our courts of +justice, no evidence can be found sufficient to convict. How slender +then must be that man's portion of information and discernment, who is +willing to commit his character and welfare to such guardianship! + +But my case was even worse than this. I intimately felt that a trial, +such as our institutions have hitherto been able to make it, is only the +worthy sequel of such a beginning. What chance was there after the +purgation I was now suffering, that I should come out acquitted at last? +What probability was there that the trial I had endured in the house of +Mr. Falkland was not just as fair as any that might be expected to +follow? No; I anticipated my own condemnation. + +Thus was I cut off, for ever, from all that existence has to +bestow--from all the high hopes I had so often conceived--from all the +future excellence my soul so much delighted to imagine,--to spend a few +weeks in a miserable prison, and then to perish by the hand of the +public executioner. No language can do justice to the indignant and +soul-sickening loathing that these ideas excited. My resentment was not +restricted to my prosecutor, but extended itself to the whole machine of +society. I could never believe that all this was the fair result of +institutions inseparable from the general good. I regarded the whole +human species as so many hangmen and torturers; I considered them as +confederated to tear me to pieces; and this wide scene of inexorable +persecution inflicted upon me inexpressible agony. I looked on this side +and on that: I was innocent; I had a right to expect assistance; but +every heart was steeled against me; every hand was ready to lend its +force to make my ruin secure. No man that has not felt, in his own most +momentous concerns, justice, eternal truth, unalterable equity engaged +in his behalf, and on the other side brute force, impenetrable +obstinacy, and unfeeling insolence, can imagine the sensations that then +passed through my mind. I saw treachery triumphant and enthroned; I saw +the sinews of innocence crumbled into dust by the gripe of almighty +guilt. + +What relief had I from these sensations? Was it relief, that I spent the +day in the midst of profligacy and execrations--that I saw reflected +from every countenance agonies only inferior to my own? He that would +form a lively idea of the regions of the damned, need only to witness, +for six hours, a scene to which I was confined for many months. Not for +one hour could I withdraw myself from this complexity of horrors, or +take refuge in the calmness of meditation. Air, exercise, series, +contrast, those grand enliveners of the human frame, I was for ever +debarred from, by the inexorable tyranny under which I was fallen. Nor +did I find the solitude of my nightly dungeon less insupportable. Its +only furniture was the straw that served me for my repose. It was +narrow, damp, and unwholesome. The slumbers of a mind, wearied, like +mine, with the most detestable uniformity, to whom neither amusement nor +occupation ever offered themselves to beguile the painful hours, were +short, disturbed, and unrefreshing. My sleeping, still more than my +waking thoughts, were full of perplexity, deformity, and disorder. To +these slumbers succeeded the hours which, by the regulations of our +prison, I was obliged, though awake, to spend in solitary and cheerless +darkness. Here I had neither books nor pens, nor any thing upon which to +engage my attention; all was a sightless blank. How was a mind, active +and indefatigable like mine, to endure this misery? I could not sink it +in lethargy; I could nor forget my woes: they haunted me with +unintermitted and demoniac malice. Cruel, inexorable policy of human +affairs, that condemns a man to torture like this; that sanctions it, +and knows not what is done under its sanction; that is too supine and +unfeeling to enquire into these petty details; that calls this the +ordeal of innocence, and the protector of freedom! A thousand times I +could have dashed my brains against the walls of my dungeon; a thousand +times I longed for death, and wished, with inexpressible ardour, for an +end to what I suffered; a thousand times I meditated suicide, and +ruminated, in the bitterness of my soul, upon the different means of +escaping from the load of existence. What had I to do with life? I had +seen enough to make me regard it with detestation. Why should I wait the +lingering process of legal despotism, and not dare so much as to die, +but when and how its instruments decreed? Still some inexplicable +suggestion withheld my hand. I clung with desperate fondness to this +shadow of existence, its mysterious attractions, and its hopeless +prospects. + + + + +CHAPTER XII. + + +Such were the reflections that haunted the first days of my +imprisonment, in consequence of which they were spent in perpetual +anguish. But, after a time, nature, wearied with distress, would no +longer stoop to the burthen; thought, which is incessantly varying, +introduced a series of reflections totally different. + +My fortitude revived. I had always been accustomed to cheerfulness, good +humour, and serenity; and this habit now returned to visit me at the +bottom of my dungeon. No sooner did my contemplations take this turn, +than I saw the reasonableness and possibility of tranquillity and peace; +and my mind whispered to me the propriety of showing, in this forlorn +condition, that I was superior to all my persecutors. Blessed state of +innocence and self-approbation! The sunshine of conscious integrity +pierced through all the barriers of my cell, and spoke ten thousand +times more joy to my heart, than the accumulated splendours of nature +and art can communicate to the slaves of vice. + +I found out the secret of employing my mind. I said, "I am shut up for +half the day in total darkness, without any external source of +amusement; the other half I spend in the midst of noise, turbulence, +and, confusion. What then? Can I not draw amusement from the stores of +my own mind? Is it not freighted with various knowledge? Have I not been +employed from my infancy in gratifying an insatiable curiosity? When +should I derive benefit from these superior advantages, if not at +present?" Accordingly I tasked the stores of my memory, and my powers of +invention. I amused myself with recollecting the history of my life. By +degrees I called to mind a number of minute circumstances, which, but +for this exercise, would have been for ever forgotten. I repassed in my +thoughts whole conversations, I recollected their subjects, their +arrangement, their incidents, frequently their very words. I mused upon +these ideas, till I was totally absorbed in thought. I repeated them, +till my mind glowed with enthusiasm. I had my different employments, +fitted for the solitude of the night, in which I could give full scope +to the impulses of my mind; and for the uproar of the day, in which my +chief object was, to be insensible to the disorder with which I was +surrounded. + +By degrees I quitted my own story, and employed myself in imaginary +adventures. I figured to myself every situation in which I could be +placed, and conceived the conduct to be observed in each. Thus scenes of +insult and danger, of tenderness and oppression, became familiar to me. +In fancy I often passed the awful hour of dissolving nature. In some of +my reveries I boiled with impetuous indignation, and in others patiently +collected the whole force of my mind for some fearful encounter. I +cultivated the powers of oratory suited to these different states, and +improved more in eloquence in the solitude of my dungeon, than perhaps I +should have done in the busiest and most crowded scenes. + +At length I proceeded to as regular a disposition of my time, as the man +in his study, who passes from mathematics to poetry, and from poetry to +the law of nations, in the different parts of each single day; and I as +seldom infringed upon my plan. Nor were my subjects of disquisition less +numerous than his. I went over, by the assistance of memory only, a +considerable part of Euclid during my confinement, and revived, day +after day, the series of facts and incidents in some of the most +celebrated historians. I became myself a poet; and, while I described +the sentiments cherished by the view of natural objects, recorded the +characters and passions of men, and partook with a burning zeal in the +generosity of their determinations, I eluded the squalid solitude of my +dungeon, and wandered in idea through all the varieties of human +society. I easily found expedients, such as the mind seems always to +require, and which books and pens supply to the man at large, to record +from time to time the progress that had been made. + +While I was thus employed, I reflected with exultation upon the degree +in which man is independent of the smiles and frowns of fortune. I was +beyond her reach, for I could fall no lower. To an ordinary eye I might +seem destitute and miserable, but in reality I wanted for nothing. My +fare was coarse; but I was in health. My dungeon was noisome; but I felt +no inconvenience. I was shut up from the usual means of exercise and +air; but I found the method of exercising myself even to perspiration in +my dungeon. I had no power of withdrawing my person from a disgustful +society, in the most cheerful and valuable part of the day; but I soon +brought to perfection the art of withdrawing my thoughts, and saw and +heard the people about me, for just as short a time, and as seldom, as I +pleased. + +Such is man in himself considered; so simple his nature; so few his +wants. How different from the man of artificial society! Palaces are +built for his reception, a thousand vehicles provided for his exercise, +provinces are ransacked for the gratification of his appetite, and the +whole world traversed to supply him with apparel and furniture. Thus +vast is his expenditure, and the purchase slavery. He is dependent on a +thousand accidents for tranquillity and health, and his body and soul +are at the devotion of whoever will satisfy his imperious cravings. + +In addition to the disadvantages of my present situation, I was reserved +for an ignominious death. What then? Every man must die. No man knows +how soon. It surely is not worse to encounter the king of terrors, in +health, and with every advantage for the collection of fortitude, than +to encounter him, already half subdued by sickness and suffering. I was +resolved at least fully to possess the days I had to live; and this is +peculiarly in the power of the man who preserves his health to the last +moment of his existence. Why should I suffer my mind to be invaded by +unavailing regrets? Every sentiment of vanity, or rather of independence +and justice within me, instigated me to say to my persecutor, "You may +cut off my existence, but you cannot disturb my serenity." + + + + +CHAPTER XIII. + + +In the midst of these reflections, another thought, which had not before +struck me, occurred to my mind. "I exult," said I, "and reasonably, over +the impotence of my persecutor. Is not that impotence greater than I +have yet imagined? I say, he may cut off my existence, but cannot +disturb my serenity. It is true: my mind, the clearness of my spirit, +the firmness of my temper, are beyond his reach; is not my life equally +so, if I please? What are the material obstacles, that man never +subdued? What is the undertaking so arduous, that by some has not been +accomplished? And if by others, why not by me? Had they stronger motives +than I? Was existence more variously endeared to them? or had they more +numerous methods by which to animate and adorn it? Many of those who +have exerted most perseverance and intrepidity, were obviously my +inferiors in that respect. Why should not I be as daring as they? +Adamant and steel have a ductility like water, to a mind sufficiently +bold and contemplative. The mind is master of itself; and is endowed +with powers that might enable it to laugh at the tyrant's vigilance." I +passed and repassed these ideas in my mind; and, heated with the +contemplation, I said, "No, I will not die!" + +My reading, in early youth, had been extremely miscellaneous. I had read +of housebreakers, to whom locks and bolts were a jest, and who, vain of +their art, exhibited the experiment of entering a house the most +strongly barricaded, with as little noise, and almost as little trouble, +as other men would lift up a latch. There is nothing so interesting to +the juvenile mind, as the wonderful; there is no power that it so +eagerly covets, as that of astonishing spectators by its miraculous +exertions. Mind appeared, to my untutored reflections, vague, airy, and +unfettered, the susceptible perceiver of reasons, but never intended by +nature to be the slave of force. Why should it be in the power of man to +overtake and hold me by violence? Why, when I choose to withdraw myself, +should I not be capable of eluding the most vigilant search? These +limbs, and this trunk, are a cumbrous and unfortunate load for the power +of thinking to drag along with it; but why should not the power of +thinking be able to lighten the load, till it shall be no longer +felt?--These early modes of reflection were by no means indifferent to +my present enquiries. + +Our next-door neighbour at my father's house had been a carpenter. Fresh +from the sort of reading I have mentioned, I was eager to examine his +tools, their powers and their uses. This carpenter was a man of strong +and vigorous mind; and, his faculties having been chiefly confined to +the range of his profession, he was fertile in experiments, and +ingenious in reasoning upon these particular topics. I therefore +obtained from him considerable satisfaction; and, my mind being set in +action, I sometimes even improved upon the hints he furnished. His +conversation was particularly agreeable to me; I at first worked with +him sometimes for my amusement, and afterwards occasionally for a short +time as his journeyman. I was constitutionally vigorous; and, by the +experience thus attained, I added to the abstract possession of power, +the skill of applying it, when I pleased, in such a manner as that no +part should be inefficient. + +It is a strange, but no uncommon feature in the human mind, that the +very resource of which we stand in greatest need in a critical +situation, though already accumulated, it may be, by preceding industry, +fails to present itself at the time when it should be called into +action. Thus my mind had passed through two very different stages since +my imprisonment, before this means of liberation suggested itself. My +faculties were overwhelmed in the first instance, and raised to a pitch +of enthusiasm in the second; while in both I took it for granted in a +manner, that I must passively submit to the good pleasure of my +persecutors. + +During the period in which my mind had been thus undecided, and when I +had been little more than a month in durance, the assizes, which were +held twice a year in the town in which I was a prisoner, came on. Upon +this occasion my case was not brought forward, but was suffered to stand +over six months longer. It would have been just the same, if I had had +as strong reason to expect acquittal as I had conviction. If I had been +apprehended upon the most frivolous reasons upon which any justice of +the peace ever thought proper to commit a naked beggar for trial, I must +still have waited about two hundred and seventeen days before my +innocence could be cleared. So imperfect are the effects of the boasted +laws of a country, whose legislators hold their assembly from four to +six months in every year! I could never discover with certainty, whether +this delay were owing to any interference on the part of my prosecutor, +or whether it fell out in the regular administration of justice, which +is too solemn and dignified to accommodate itself to the rights or +benefit of an insignificant individual. + +But this was not the only incident that occurred to me during my +confinement, for which I could find no satisfactory solution. It was +nearly at the same time, that the keeper began to alter his behaviour to +me. He sent for me one morning into the part of the building which was +appropriated for his own use, and, after some hesitation, told me he was +sorry my accommodations had been so indifferent, and asked whether I +should like to have a chamber in his family? I was struck with the +unexpectedness of this question, and desired to know whether any body +had employed him to ask it. No, he replied; but, now the assizes were +over, he had fewer felons on his hands, and more time to look about him. +He believed I was a good kind of a young man, and he had taken a sort of +a liking to me. I fixed my eye upon his countenance as he said this. I +could discover none of the usual symptoms of kindness; he appeared to me +to be acting a part, unnatural, and that sat with awkwardness upon him. +He went on however to offer me the liberty of eating at his table; +which, if I chose it, he said, would make no difference to him, and he +should not think of charging me any thing for it. He had always indeed +as much upon his hands as one person could see to; but his wife and his +daughter Peggy would be woundily pleased to hear a person of learning +talk, as he understood I was; and perhaps I might not feel myself +unpleasantly circumstanced in their company. + +I reflected on this proposal, and had little doubt, notwithstanding what +the keeper had affirmed to the contrary, that it did not proceed from +any spontaneous humanity in him, but that he had, to speak the language +of persons of his cast, good reasons for what he did. I busied myself in +conjectures as to who could be the author of this sort of indulgence and +attention. The two most likely persons were Mr. Falkland and Mr. +Forester. The latter I knew to be a man austere and inexorable towards +those whom he deemed vicious. He piqued himself upon being insensible to +those softer emotions, which, he believed, answered no other purpose +than to seduce us from our duty. Mr. Falkland, on the contrary, was a +man of the acutest sensibility; hence arose his pleasures and his pains, +his virtues and his vices. Though he were the bitterest enemy to whom I +could possibly be exposed, and though no sentiments of humanity could +divert or control the bent of his mind, I yet persuaded myself, that he +was more likely than his kinsman, to visit in idea the scene of my +dungeon, and to feel impelled to alleviate my sufferings. + +This conjecture was by no means calculated to serve as balm to my mind. +My thoughts were full of irritation against my persecutor. How could I +think kindly of a man, in competition with the gratification of whose +ruling passion my good name or my life was deemed of no consideration? I +saw him crushing the one, and bringing the other into jeopardy, with a +quietness and composure on his part that I could not recollect without +horror. I knew not what were his plans respecting me. I knew not whether +he troubled himself so much as to form a barren wish for the +preservation of one whose future prospects he had so iniquitously +tarnished. I had hitherto been silent as to my principal topic of +recrimination. But I was by no means certain, that I should consent to +go out of the world in silence, the victim of this man's obduracy and +art. In every view I felt my heart ulcerated with a sense of his +injustice; and my very soul spurned these pitiful indulgences, at a time +that he was grinding me into dust with the inexorableness of his +vengeance. + +I was influenced by these sentiments in my reply to the jailor; and I +found a secret pleasure in pronouncing them in all their bitterness. I +viewed him with a sarcastic smile, and said, I was glad to find him of a +sudden become so humane: I was not however without some penetration as +to the humanity of a jailor, and could guess at the circumstances by +which it was produced. But he might tell his employer, that his cares +were fruitless: I would accept no favours from a man that held a halter +about my neck; and had courage enough to endure the worst both in time +to come and now.--The jailor looked at me with astonishment, and turning +upon his heel, exclaimed, "Well done, my cock! You have not had your +learning for nothing, I see. You are set upon not dying dunghill. But +that is to come, lad; you had better by half keep your courage till you +shall find it wanted." + +The assizes, which passed over without influence to me, produced a great +revolution among my fellow-prisoners. I lived long enough in the jail to +witness a general mutation of its inhabitants. One of the housebreakers +(the rival of the Duke of Bedford), and the coiner, were hanged. Two +more were cast for transportation, and the rest acquitted. The +transports remained with us; and, though the prison was thus lightened +of nine of its inhabitants, there were, at the next half-yearly period +of assizes, as many persons on the felons' side, within three, as I had +found on my first arrival. + +The soldier, whose story I have already recorded, died on the evening of +the very day on which the judges arrived, of a disease the consequence +of his confinement. Such was the justice, that resulted from the laws of +his country to an individual who would have been the ornament of any +age; one who, of all the men I ever knew, was perhaps the kindest, of +the most feeling heart, of the most engaging and unaffected manners, and +the most unblemished life. The name of this man was Brightwel. Were it +possible for my pen to consecrate him to never-dying fame, I could +undertake no task more grateful to my heart. His judgment was +penetrating and manly, totally unmixed with imbecility and confusion, +while at the same time there was such an uncontending frankness in his +countenance, that a superficial observer would have supposed he must +have been the prey of the first plausible knavery that was practised +against him. Great reason have I to remember him with affection! He was +the most ardent, I had almost said the last, of my friends. Nor did I +remain in this respect in his debt. There was indeed a great +congeniality, if I may presume to say so, in our characters, except that +I cannot pretend to rival the originality and self-created vigour of his +mind, or to compare with, what the world has scarcely surpassed, the +correctness and untainted purity of his conduct. He heard my story, as +far as I thought proper to disclose it, with interest; he examined it +with sincere impartiality; and if, at first, any doubt remained upon his +mind, a frequent observation of me in my most unguarded moments taught +him in no long time to place an unreserved confidence in my innocence. + +He talked of the injustice of which we were mutual victims, without +bitterness; and delighted to believe that the time would come, when the +possibility of such intolerable oppression would be extirpated. But +this, he said, was a happiness reserved for posterity; it was too late +for us to reap the benefit of it. It was some consolation to him, that +he could not tell the period in his past life, which the best judgment +of which he was capable would teach him to spend better. He could say, +with as much reason as most men, he had discharged his duty. But he +foresaw that he should not survive his present calamity. This was his +prediction, while yet in health. He might be said, in a certain sense, +to have a broken heart. But, if that phrase were in any way applicable +to him, sure never was despair more calm, more full of resignation and +serenity. + +At no time in the whole course of my adventures was I exposed to a shock +more severe, than I received from this man's death. The circumstances of +his fate presented themselves to my mind in their full complication of +iniquity. From him, and the execrations with which I loaded the +government that could be the instrument of his tragedy, I turned to +myself. I beheld the catastrophe of Brightwel with envy. A thousand +times I longed that my corse had lain in death, instead of his. I was +only reserved, as I persuaded myself, for unutterable woe. In a few days +he would have been acquitted; his liberty, his reputation restored; +mankind perhaps, struck with the injustice he had suffered, would have +shown themselves eager to balance his misfortunes, and obliterate his +disgrace. But this man died; and I remained alive! I, who, though not +less wrongfully treated than he, had no hope of reparation, must be +marked as long as I lived for a villain, and in my death probably held +up to the scorn and detestation of my species! + +Such were some of the immediate reflections which the fate of this +unfortunate martyr produced in my mind. Yet my intercourse with +Brightwel was not, in the review, without its portion of comfort. I +said, "This man has seen through the veil of calumny that overshades me: +he has understood, and has loved me. Why should I despair? May I not +meet hereafter with men ingenuous like him, who shall do me justice, and +sympathise with my calamity? With that consolation I will be satisfied. +I will rest in the arms of friendship, and forget the malignity of the +world. Henceforth I will be contented with tranquil obscurity, with the +cultivation of sentiment and wisdom, and the exercise of benevolence +within a narrow circle." It was thus that my mind became excited to the +project I was about to undertake. + +I had no sooner meditated the idea of an escape, than I determined upon +the following method of facilitating the preparations for it. I +undertook to ingratiate myself with my keeper. In the world I have +generally found such persons as had been acquainted with the outline of +my story, regarding me with a sort of loathing and abhorrence, which +made them avoid me with as much care as if I had been spotted with the +plague. The idea of my having first robbed my patron, and then +endeavouring to clear myself by charging him with subornation against +me, placed me in a class distinct from, and infinitely more guilty than +that of common felons. But this man was too good a master of his +profession, to entertain aversion against a fellow-creature upon that +score. He considered the persons committed to his custody, merely as so +many human bodies, for whom he was responsible that they should be +forthcoming in time and place; and the difference of innocence and guilt +he looked down upon as an affair beneath his attention. I had not +therefore the prejudices to encounter in recommending myself to him, +that I have found so peculiarly obstinate in other cases. Add to which, +the same motive, whatever it was, that had made him so profuse in his +offers a little before, had probably its influence on the present +occasion. + +I informed him of my skill in the profession of a joiner, and offered to +make him half a dozen handsome chairs, if he would facilitate my +obtaining the tools necessary for carrying on my profession in my +present confinement; for, without his consent previously obtained, it +would have been in vain for me to expect that I could quietly exert an +industry of this kind, even if my existence had depended upon it. He +looked at me first, as asking himself what he was to understand by this +novel proposal; and then, his countenance most graciously relaxing, +said, he was glad I was come off a little of my high notions and my +buckram, and he would see what he could do. Two days after, he signified +his compliance. He said that, as to the matter of the present I had +offered him, he thought nothing of that; I might do as I pleased in it; +but I might depend upon every civility from him that he could show with +safety to himself, if so be as, when he was civil, I did not offer a +second time for to snap and take him up short. + +Having thus gained my preliminary, I gradually accumulated tools of +various sorts--gimlets, piercers, chisels, _et cetera_. I immediately +set myself to work. The nights were long, and the sordid eagerness of my +keeper, notwithstanding his ostentatious generosity, was great; I +therefore petitioned for, and was indulged with, a bit of candle, that I +might amuse myself for an hour or two with my work after I was locked up +in my dungeon. I did not however by any means apply constantly to the +work I had undertaken, and my jailor betrayed various tokens of +impatience. Perhaps he was afraid I should not have finished it, before +I was hanged. I however insisted upon working at my leisure as I +pleased; and this he did not venture expressly to dispute. In addition +to the advantages thus obtained, I procured secretly from Miss Peggy, +who now and then came into the jail to make her observations of the +prisoners, and who seemed to have conceived some partiality for my +person, the implement of an iron crow. + +In these proceedings it is easy to trace the vice and duplicity that +must be expected to grow out of injustice. I know not whether my readers +will pardon the sinister advantage I extracted from the mysterious +concessions of my keeper. But I must acknowledge my weakness in that +respect; I am writing my adventures, and not my apology; and I was not +prepared to maintain the unvaried sincerity of my manners, at the +expense of a speedy close of my existence. + +My plan was now digested. I believed that, by means of the crow, I could +easily, and without much noise, force the door of my dungeon from its +hinges, or if not, that I could, in case of necessity, cut away the +lock. This door led into a narrow passage, bounded on one side by the +range of dungeons, and on the other by the jailor's and turnkeys' +apartments, through which was the usual entrance from the street. This +outlet I dared not attempt, for fear of disturbing the persons close to +whose very door I should in that case have found it necessary to pass. I +determined therefore upon another door at the further end of the +passage, which was well barricaded, and which led to a sort of garden in +the occupation of the keeper. This garden I had never entered, but I had +had an opportunity of observing it from the window of the felons' +day-room, which looked that way, the room itself being immediately over +the range of dungeons. I perceived that it was bounded by a wall of +considerable height, which I was told by my fellow-prisoners was the +extremity of the jail on that side, and beyond which was a back-lane of +some length, that terminated in the skirts of the town. Upon an accurate +observation, and much reflection upon the subject, I found I should be +able, if once I got into the garden, with my gimlets and piercers +inserted at proper distances to make a sort of ladder, by means of which +I could clear the wall, and once more take possession of the sweets of +liberty. I preferred this wall to that which immediately skirted my +dungeon, on the other side of which was a populous street. + +I suffered about two days to elapse from the period at which I had +thoroughly digested my project, and then in the very middle of the night +began to set about its execution. The first door was attended with +considerable difficulty; but at length this obstacle was happily +removed. The second door was fastened on the inside. I was therefore +able with perfect ease to push back the bolts. But the lock, which of +course was depended upon for the principal security, and was therefore +strong, was double-shot, and the key taken away. I endeavoured with my +chisel to force back the bolt of the lock, but to no purpose. I then +unscrewed the box of the lock; and, that being taken away, the door was +no longer opposed to my wishes. + +Thus far I had proceeded with the happiest success; but close on the +other side of the door there was a kennel with a large mastiff dog, of +which I had not the smallest previous knowledge. Though I stepped along +in the most careful manner, this animal was disturbed, and began to +bark. I was extremely disconcerted, but immediately applied myself to +soothe the animal, in which I presently succeeded. I then returned along +the passage to listen whether any body had been disturbed by the noise +of the dog; resolved, if that had been the case, that I would return to +my dungeon, and endeavour to replace every thing in its former state. +But the whole appeared perfectly quiet, and I was encouraged to proceed +in my operation. + +I now got to the wall, and had nearly gained half the ascent, when I +heard a voice at the garden-door, crying, "Holloa! who is there? who +opened the door?" The man received no answer, and the night was too dark +for him to distinguish objects at any distance. He therefore returned, +as I judged, into the house for a light. Meantime the dog, understanding +the key in which these interrogations were uttered, began barking again +more violently than ever. I had now no possibility of retreat, and I was +not without hopes that I might yet accomplish my object, and clear the +wall. Meanwhile a second man came out, while the other was getting his +lantern, and by the time I had got to the top of the wall was able to +perceive me. He immediately set up a shout, and threw a large stone, +which grazed me in its flight. Alarmed at my situation, I was obliged +to descend on the other side without taking the necessary precautions, +and in my fall nearly dislocated my ankle. + +There was a door in the wall, of which I was not previously apprised; +and, this being opened, the two men with the lantern were on the other +side in an instant. They had then nothing to do but to run along the +lane to the place from which I had descended. I endeavoured to rise +after my fall; but the pain was so intense, that I was scarcely able to +stand, and, after having limped a few paces, I twisted my foot under me, +and fell down again. I had now no remedy, and quietly suffered myself to +be retaken. + + + + +CHAPTER XIV. + + +I was conducted to the keeper's room for that night, and the two men sat +up with me. I was accosted with many interrogatories, to which I gave +little answer, but complained of the hurt in my leg. To this I could +obtain no reply, except "Curse you, my lad! if that be all, we will give +you some ointment for that; we will anoint it with a little cold iron." +They were indeed excessively sulky with me, for having broken their +night's rest, and given them all this trouble. In the morning they were +as good as their word, fixing a pair of fetters upon both my legs, +regardless of the ankle which was now swelled to a considerable size, +and then fastening me, with a padlock, to a staple in the floor of my +dungeon. I expostulated with warmth upon this treatment, and told them, +that I was a man upon whom the law as yet had passed no censure, and who +therefore, in the eye of the law, was innocent. But they bid me keep +such fudge for people who knew no better; they knew what they did, and +would answer it to any court in England. + +The pain of the fetter was intolerable. I endeavoured in various ways to +relieve it, and even privily to free my leg; but the more it was +swelled, the more was this rendered impossible. I then resolved to bear +it with patience: still, the longer it continued, the worse it grew. +After two days and two nights, I entreated the turnkey to go and ask the +surgeon, who usually attended the prison, to look at it, for, if it +continued longer as it was, I was convinced it would mortify. But he +glared surlily at me, and said, "Damn my blood! I should like to see +that day. To die of a mortification is too good an end for such a +rascal!" At the time that he thus addressed me, the whole mass of my +blood was already fevered by the anguish I had undergone, my patience +was wholly exhausted, and I was silly enough to be irritated beyond +bearing, by his impertinence and vulgarity: "Look, you, Mr. Turnkey," +said I, "there is one thing that such fellows as you are set over us +for, and another thing that you are not. You are to take care we do not +escape; but it is no part of your office to call us names and abuse us. +If I were not chained to the floor, you dare as well eat your fingers as +use such language; and, take my word for it, you shall yet live to +repent of your insolence." + +While I thus spoke, the man stared at me with astonishment. He was so +little accustomed to such retorts, that, at first, he could scarcely +believe his ears; and such was the firmness of my manner, that he seemed +to forget for a moment that I was not at large. But, as soon as he had +time to recollect himself, he did not deign to be angry. His face +relaxed into a smile of contempt; he snapped his fingers at me; and, +turning upon his heel, exclaimed, "Well said, my cock! crow away! Have a +care you do not burst!" and, as he shut the door upon me, mimicked the +voice of the animal he mentioned. + +This rejoinder brought me to myself in a moment, and showed me the +impotence of the resentment I was expressing. But, though he thus put an +end to the violence of my speech, the torture of my body continued as +great as ever. I was determined to change my mode of attack. The same +turnkey returned in a few minutes; and, as he approached me, to put down +some food he had brought, I slipped a shilling into his hand, saying at +the same time, "My good fellow, for God's sake, go to the surgeon; I am +sure you do not wish me to perish for want of assistance." The fellow +put the shilling into his pocket, looked hard at me, and then with one +nod of his head, and without uttering a single word, went away. The +surgeon presently after made his appearance; and, finding the part in a +high state of inflammation, ordered certain applications, and gave +peremptory directions that the fetter should not be replaced upon that +leg, till a cure had been effected. It was a full month before the leg +was perfectly healed, and made equally strong and flexible with the +other. + +The condition in which I was now placed, was totally different from that +which had preceded this attempt. I was chained all day in my dungeon, +with no other mitigation, except that the door was regularly opened for +a few hours in an afternoon, at which time some of the prisoners +occasionally came and spoke to me, particularly one, who, though he +could ill replace my benevolent Brightwel, was not deficient in +excellent qualities. This was no other than the individual whom Mr. +Falkland had, some months before, dismissed upon an accusation of +murder. His courage was gone, his garb was squalid, and the comeliness +and clearness of his countenance was utterly obliterated. He also was +innocent, worthy, brave, and benevolent. He was, I believe, afterwards +acquitted, and turned loose, to wander a desolate and perturbed spectre +through the world. My manual labours were now at an end; my dungeon was +searched every night, and every kind of tool carefully kept from me. The +straw, which had been hitherto allowed me, was removed, under pretence +that it was adapted for concealment; and the only conveniences with +which I was indulged, were a chair and a blanket. + +A prospect of some alleviation in no long time opened upon me; but this +my usual ill fortune rendered abortive. The keeper once more made his +appearance, and with his former constitutional and ambiguous humanity. +He pretended to be surprised at my want of every accommodation. He +reprehended in strong terms my attempt to escape, and observed, that +there must be an end of civility from people in his situation, if +gentlemen, after all, would not know when they were well. It was +necessary, in cases the like of this, to let the law take its course; +and it would be ridiculous in me to complain, if, after a regular trial, +things should go hard with me. He was desirous of being in every respect +my friend, if I would let him. In the midst of this circumlocution and +preamble, he was called away from me, for something relating to the +business of his office. In the mean time I ruminated upon his overtures; +and, detesting as I did the source from which I conceived them to flow, +I could not help reflecting how far it would be possible to extract from +them the means of escape. But my meditations in this case were vain. +The keeper returned no more during the remainder of that day, and, on +the next, an incident occurred which put an end to all expectations from +his kindness. + +An active mind, which has once been forced into any particular train, +can scarcely be persuaded to desert it as hopeless. I had studied my +chains, during the extreme anguish that I endured from the pressure of +the fetter upon the ankle which had been sprained; and though, from the +swelling and acute sensibility of the part, I had found all attempts at +relief, in that instance, impracticable, I obtained, from the coolness +of my investigation, another and apparently superior advantage. During +the night, my dungeon was in a complete state of darkness; but, when the +door was open, the case was somewhat different. The passage indeed into +which it opened, was so narrow, and the opposite dead wall so near, that +it was but a glimmering and melancholy light that entered my apartment, +even at full noon, and when the door was at its widest extent. But my +eyes, after a practice of two or three weeks, accommodated themselves to +this circumstance, and I learned to distinguish the minutest object. One +day, as I was alternately meditating and examining the objects around +me, I chanced to observe a nail trodden into the mud-floor at no great +distance from me. I immediately conceived the desire of possessing +myself of this implement; but, for fear of surprise, people passing +perpetually to and fro, I contented myself, for the present, with +remarking its situation so accurately, that I might easily find it again +in the dark. Accordingly, as soon as my door was shut, I seized upon +this new treasure, and, having contrived to fashion it to my purpose, +found that I could unlock with it the padlock that fastened me to the +staple in the floor. This I regarded as no inconsiderable advantage, +separately from the use I might derive from it in relation to my +principal object. My chain permitted me to move only about eighteen +inches to the right or left; and, having borne this confinement for +several weeks, my very heart leaped at the pitiful consolation of being +able to range, without constraint, the miserable coop in which I was +immured. This incident had occurred several days previously to the last +visit of my keeper. + +From this time it had been my constant practice to liberate myself every +night, and not to replace things in their former situation till I awoke +in the morning, and expected shortly to perceive the entrance of the +turnkey. Security breeds negligence. On the morning succeeding my +conference with the jailor, it so happened, whether I overslept myself, +or the turnkey went his round earlier than usual, that I was roused from +my sleep by the noise he made in opening the cell next to my own; and +though I exerted the utmost diligence, yet having to grope for my +materials in the dark, I was unable to fasten the chain to the staple, +before he entered, as usual, with his lantern. He was extremely +surprised to find me disengaged, and immediately summoned the principal +keeper. I was questioned respecting my method of proceeding; and, as I +believed concealment could lead to nothing but a severer search, and a +more accurate watch, I readily acquainted them with the exact truth. The +illustrious personage, whose functions it was to control the inhabitants +of these walls, was, by this last instance, completely exasperated +against me. Artifice and fair speaking were at an end. His eyes sparkled +with fury; he exclaimed, that he was now convinced of the folly of +showing kindness to rascals, the scum of the earth, such as I was; and, +damn him, if any body should catch him at that again towards any one. I +had cured him effectually! He was astonished that the laws had not +provided some terrible retaliation for thieves that attempted to deceive +their jailors. Hanging was a thousand times too good for me! + +Having vented his indignation, he proceeded to give such orders as the +united instigations of anger and alarm suggested to his mind. My +apartment was changed. I was conducted to a room called the strong room, +the door of which opened into the middle cell of the range of dungeons. +It was under-ground, as they were, and had also the day-room for felons, +already described, immediately over it. It was spacious and dreary. The +door had not been opened for years; the air was putrid; and the walls +hung round with damps and mildew. The fetters, the padlock, and the +staple, were employed, as in the former case, in addition to which they +put on me a pair of handcuffs. For my first provision, the keeper sent +me nothing but a bit of bread, mouldy and black, and some dirty and +stinking water. I know not indeed whether this is to be regarded as +gratuitous tyranny on the part of the jailor; the law having providently +directed, in certain cases, that the water to be administered to the +prisoners shall be taken from "the next sink or puddle nearest to the +jail."[E] It was further ordered, that one of the turnkeys should sleep +in the cell that formed a sort of anti-chamber to my apartment. Though +every convenience was provided, to render this chamber fit for the +reception of a personage of a dignity so superior to the felon he was +appointed to guard, he expressed much dissatisfaction at the mandate: +but there was no alternative. + +[Footnote E: In the case of the _peine forte et dure_. See State Trials, +Vol. I. _anno_ 1615.] + +The situation to which I was thus removed was, apparently, the most +undesirable that could be imagined but I was not discouraged; I had for +some time learned not to judge by appearances. The apartment was dark +and unwholesome; but I had acquired the secret of counteracting these +influences. My door was kept continually shut, and the other prisoners +were debarred access to me; but if the intercourse of our fellow-men has +its pleasure, solitude, on the other hand, is not without its +advantages. In solitude we can pursue our own thoughts undisturbed; and +I was able to call up at will the most pleasing avocations. Besides +which, to one who meditated such designs as now filled my mind, solitude +had peculiar recommendations. I was scarcely left to myself, before I +tried an experiment, the idea of which I conceived, while they were +fixing my handcuffs; and, with my teeth only, disengaged myself from +this restraint. The hours at which I was visited by the keepers were +regular, and I took care to be provided for them. Add to which, I had a +narrow grated window near the ceiling, about nine inches in +perpendicular, and a foot and a half horizontally, which, though small, +admitted a much stronger light than that to which I had been accustomed +for several weeks. Thus circumstanced, I scarcely ever found myself in +total darkness, and was better provided against surprises than I had +been in my preceding situation. Such were the sentiments which this +change of abode immediately suggested. + +I had been a very little time removed, when I received an unexpected +visit from Thomas, Mr. Falkland's footman, whom I have already mentioned +in the course of my narrative. A servant of Mr. Forester happened to +come to the town where I was imprisoned, a few weeks before, while I was +confined with the hurt in my ankle, and had called in to see me. The +account he gave of what he observed had been the source of many an +uneasy sensation to Thomas. The former visit was a matter of mere +curiosity; but Thomas was of the better order of servants. He was +considerably struck at the sight of me. Though my mind was now serene, +and my health sufficiently good, yet the floridness of my complexion was +gone, and there was a rudeness in my physiognomy, the consequence of +hardship and fortitude, extremely unlike the sleekness of my better +days. Thomas looked alternately in my face, at my hands, and my feet; +and then fetched a deep sigh. After a pause, + +"Lord bless us!" said he, in a voice in which commiseration was +sufficiently perceptible, "is this you?" + +"Why not, Thomas? You knew I was sent to prison, did not you?" + +"Prison! and must people in prison be shackled and bound of that +fashion?--and where do you lay of nights?" + +"Here." + +"Here? Why there is no bed!" + +"No, Thomas, I am not allowed a bed. I had straw formerly, but that is +taken away." + +"And do they take off them there things of nights?" + +"No; I am expected to sleep just as you see." + +"Sleep! Why I thought this was a Christian country; but this usage is +too bad for a dog." + +"You must not say so, Thomas; it is what the wisdom of government has +thought fit to provide." + +"Zounds, how I have been deceived! They told me what a fine thing it was +to be an Englishman, and about liberty and property, and all that there; +and I find it is all a flam. Lord, what fools we be! Things are done +under our very noses, and we know nothing of the matter; and a parcel of +fellows with grave faces swear to us, that such things never happen but +in France, and other countries the like of that. Why, you ha'n't been +tried, ha' you?" + +"No." + +"And what signifies being tried, when they do worse than hang a man, and +all beforehand? Well, master Williams, you have been very wicked to be +sure, and I thought it would have done me good to see you hanged. But, I +do not know how it is, one's heart melts, and pity comes over one, if we +take time to cool. I know that ought not to be; but, damn it, when I +talked of your being hanged, I did not think of your suffering all this +into the bargain." + +Soon after this conversation Thomas left me. The idea of the long +connection of our families rushed upon his memory, and he felt more for +my sufferings, at the moment, than I did for myself. In the afternoon I +was surprised to see him again. He said that he could not get the +thought of me out of his mind, and therefore he hoped I would not be +displeased at his coming once more to take leave of me. I could perceive +that he had something upon his mind, which he did not know how to +discharge. One of the turnkeys had each time come into the room with +him, and continued as long as he staid. Upon some avocation however--a +noise, I believe, in the passage--the turnkey went as far as the door to +satisfy his curiosity; and Thomas, watching the opportunity, slipped +into my hand a chisel, a file, and a saw, exclaiming at the same time +with a sorrowful tone, "I know I am doing wrong; but, if they hang me +too, I cannot help it; I cannot do no other. For Christ's sake, get out +of this place; I cannot bear the thoughts of it!" I received the +implements with great joy, and thrust them into my bosom; and, as soon +as he was gone, concealed them in the rushes of my chair. For himself +he had accomplished the object for which he came, and presently after +bade me farewell. + +The next day, the keepers, I know not for what reason, were more than +usually industrious in their search, saying, though without assigning +any ground for their suspicion, that they were sure I had some tool in +my possession that I ought not; but the depository I had chosen escaped +them. + +I waited from this time the greater part of a week, that I might have +the benefit of a bright moonlight. It was necessary that I should work +in the night; it was necessary that my operations should be performed +between the last visit of the keepers at night and their first in the +morning, that is, between nine in the evening and seven. In my dungeon, +as I have already said, I passed fourteen or sixteen hours of the +four-and-twenty undisturbed; but since I had acquired a character for +mechanical ingenuity, a particular exception with respect to me was made +from the general rules of the prison. + +It was ten o'clock when I entered on my undertaking. The room in which I +was confined was secured with a double door. This was totally +superfluous for the purpose of my detention, since there was a sentinel +planted on the outside. But it was very fortunate for my plan; because +these doors prevented the easy communication of sound, and afforded me +tolerable satisfaction that, with a little care in my mode of +proceeding, I might be secure against the danger of being overheard. I +first took off my handcuffs. I then filed through my fetters; and next +performed the same service to three of the iron bars that secured my +window, to which I climbed, partly by the assistance of my chair, and +partly by means of certain irregularities in the wall. All this was the +work of more than two hours. When the bars were filed through, I easily +forced them a little from the perpendicular, and then drew them, one by +one, out of the wall, into which they were sunk about three inches +perfectly straight, and without any precaution to prevent their being +removed. But the space thus obtained was by no means wide enough to +admit the passing of my body. I therefore applied myself, partly with my +chisel, and partly with one of the iron bars, to the loosening the +brick-work; and when I had thus disengaged four or five bricks, I got +down and piled them upon the floor. This operation I repeated three or +four times The space was now sufficient for my purpose: and, having +crept through the opening, I stepped upon a shed on the outside. + +I was now in a kind of rude area between two dead walls, that south of +the felons' day-room (the windows of which were at the east end) and the +wall of the prison. But I had not, as formerly, any instruments to +assist me in scaling the wall, which was of considerable height. There +was, of consequence, no resource for me but that of effecting a +practicable breach in the lower part of the wall, which was of no +contemptible strength, being of stone on the outside, with a facing of +brick within. The rooms for the debtors were at right angles with the +building from which I had just escaped; and, as the night was extremely +bright, I was in momentary danger, particularly in case of the least +noise, of being discovered by them, several of their windows commanding +this area. Thus circumstanced, I determined to make the shed answer the +purpose of concealment. It was locked; but, with the broken link of my +fetters, which I had had the precaution to bring with me, I found no +great difficulty in opening the lock. I had now got a sufficient means +of hiding my person while I proceeded in my work, attended with no +other disadvantage than that of being obliged to leave the door, through +which I had thus broken, a little open for the sake of light. After some +time, I had removed a considerable part of the brick-work of the outer +wall; but, when I came to the stone, I found the undertaking infinitely +more difficult. The mortar which bound together the building was, by +length of time, nearly petrified, and appeared to my first efforts one +solid rock of the hardest adamant. I had now been six hours incessantly +engaged in incredible labour: my chisel broke in the first attempt upon +this new obstacle; and between fatigue already endured, and the +seemingly invincible difficulty before me, I concluded that I must +remain where I was, and gave up the idea of further effort as useless. +At the same time the moon, whose light had till now been of the greatest +use to me, set, and I was left in total darkness. + +After a respite of ten minutes however, I returned to the attack with +new vigour. It could not be less than two hours before the first stone +was loosened from the edifice. In one hour more, the space was +sufficient to admit of my escape. The pile of bricks I had left in the +strong room was considerable. But it was a mole-hill compared with the +ruins I had forced from the outer wall. I am fully assured that the work +I had thus performed would have been to a common labourer, with every +advantage of tools, the business of two or three days. But my +difficulties, instead of being ended, seemed to be only begun. The day +broke, before I had completed the opening, and in ten minutes more the +keepers would probably enter my apartment, and perceive the devastation +I had left. The lane, which connected the side of the prison through +which I had escaped with the adjacent country, was formed chiefly by +two dead walls, with here and there a stable, a few warehouses, and some +mean habitations, tenanted by the lower order of people. My best +security lay in clearing the town as soon as possible, and depending +upon the open country for protection. My arms were intolerably swelled +and bruised with my labour, and my strength seemed wholly exhausted with +fatigue. Speed I was nearly unable to exert for any continuance; and, if +I could, with the enemy so close at my heels, speed would too probably +have been useless. It appeared as if I were now in almost the same +situation as that in which I had been placed five or six weeks before, +in which, after having completed my escape, I was obliged to yield +myself up, without resistance, to my pursuers. I was not however +disabled as then; I was capable of exertion, to what precise extent I +could not ascertain; and I was well aware, that every instance in which +I should fail of my purpose would contribute to enhance the difficulty +of any future attempt. Such were the considerations that presented +themselves in relation to my escape; and, even if that were effected, I +had to reckon among my difficulties, that, at the time I quitted my +prison, I was destitute of every resource, and had not a shilling +remaining in the world. + + +END OF THE SECOND VOLUME. + + * * * * * + + + + +VOLUME THE THIRD. + + + + +CHAPTER I. + + +I passed along the lane I have described, without perceiving or being +observed by a human being. The doors were shut, the window-shutters +closed, and all was still as night. I reached the extremity of the lane +unmolested. My pursuers, if they immediately followed, would know that +the likelihood was small, of my having in the interval found shelter in +this place; and would proceed without hesitation, as I on my part was +obliged to do, from the end nearest to the prison to its furthest +termination. + +The face of the country, in the spot to which I had thus opened myself a +passage, was rude and uncultivated. It was overgrown with brushwood and +furze; the soil was for the most part of a loose sand; and the surface +extremely irregular. I climbed a small eminence, and could perceive, not +very remote in the distance, a few cottages thinly scattered. This +prospect did not altogether please me; I conceived that my safety would, +for the present, be extremely assisted, by keeping myself from the view +of any human being. + +I therefore came down again into the valley, and upon a careful +examination perceived that it was interspersed with cavities, some +deeper than others, but all of them so shallow, as neither to be capable +of hiding a man, nor of exciting suspicion as places of possible +concealment. Meanwhile the day had but just begun to dawn; the morning +was lowering and drizzly; and, though the depth of these caverns was of +course well known to the neighbouring inhabitants, the shadows they cast +were so black and impenetrable, as might well have produced wider +expectations in the mind of a stranger. Poor therefore as was the +protection they were able to afford, I thought it right to have recourse +to it for the moment, as the best the emergency would supply. It was for +my life; and, the greater was the jeopardy to which it was exposed, the +more dear did that life seem to become to my affections. The recess I +chose, as most secure, was within little more than a hundred yards of +the end of the lane, and the extreme buildings of the town. + +I had not stood up in this manner two minutes, before I heard the sound +of feet, and presently saw the ordinary turnkey and another pass the +place of my retreat. They were so close to me that, if I had stretched +out my hand, I believe I could have caught hold of their clothes, +without so much as changing my posture. As no part of the overhanging +earth intervened between me and them, I could see them entire, though +the deepness of the shade rendered me almost completely invisible. I +heard them say to each other, in tones of vehement asperity, "Curse the +rascal! which way can he be gone?" The reply was, "Damn him! I wish we +had him but safe once again!"--"Never fear!" rejoined the first; "he +cannot have above half a mile the start of us." They were presently out +of hearing; for, as to sight, I dared not advance my body, so much as an +inch, to look after them, lest I should be discovered by my pursuers in +some other direction. From the very short time that elapsed, between my +escape and the appearance of these men, I concluded that they had made +their way through the same outlet as I had done, it being impossible +that they could have had time to come, from the gate of the prison, and +so round a considerable part of the town, as they must otherwise have +done. + +I was so alarmed at this instance of diligence on the part of the enemy, +that, for some time, I scarcely ventured to proceed an inch from my +place of concealment, or almost to change my posture. The morning, which +had been bleak and drizzly, was succeeded by a day of heavy and +incessant rain; and the gloomy state of the air and surrounding objects, +together with the extreme nearness of my prison, and a total want of +food, caused me to pass the hours in no very agreeable sensations. This +inclemency of the weather however, which generated a feeling of +stillness and solitude, encouraged me by degrees to change my retreat, +for another of the same nature, out of somewhat greater security. I +hovered with little variation about a single spot, as long as the sun +continued above the horizon. + +Towards evening, the clouds began to disperse, and the moon shone, as on +the preceding night, in full brightness. I had perceived no human +creature during the whole day, except in the instance already mentioned. +This had perhaps been owing to the nature of the day; at all events I +considered it as too hazardous an experiment, to venture from my +hiding-place in so clear and fine a night. I was therefore obliged to +wait for the setting of this luminary, which was not till near five +o'clock in the morning. My only relief during this interval was to allow +myself to sink to the bottom of my cavern, it being scarcely possible +for me to continue any longer on my feet. Here I fell into an +interrupted and unrefreshing doze, the consequence of a laborious night, +and a tedious, melancholy day; though I rather sought to avoid sleep, +which, cooperating with the coldness of the season, would tend more to +injury than advantage. + +The period of darkness, which I had determined to use for the purpose of +removing to a greater distance from my prison, was, in its whole +duration, something less than three hours. When I rose from my seat, I +was weak with hunger and fatigue, and, which was worse, I seemed, +between the dampness of the preceding day and the sharp, clear frost of +the night, to have lost the command of my limbs. I stood up and shook +myself; I leaned against the side of the hill, impelling in different +directions the muscles of the extremities; and at length recovered in +some degree the sense of feeling. This operation was attended with an +incredible aching pain, and required no common share of resolution to +encounter and prosecute it. Having quitted my retreat, I at first +advanced with weak and tottering steps; but, as I proceeded, increased +my pace. The barren heath, which reached to the edge of the town, was, +at least on this side, without a path; but the stars shone, and, guiding +myself by them, I determined to steer as far as possible from the +hateful scene where I had been so long confined. The line I pursued was +of irregular surface, sometimes obliging me to climb a steep ascent, and +at others to go down into a dark and impenetrable dell. I was often +compelled, by the dangerousness of the way, to deviate considerably from +the direction I wished to pursue. In the mean time I advanced with as +much rapidity as these and similar obstacles would permit me to do. The +swiftness of the motion, and the thinness of the air, restored to me my +alacrity. I forgot the inconveniences under which I laboured, and my +mind became lively, spirited, and enthusiastic. + +I had now reached the border of the heath, and entered upon what is +usually termed the forest. Strange as it may seem, it is nevertheless +true, that, in this conjuncture, exhausted with hunger, destitute of all +provision for the future, and surrounded with the most alarming dangers, +my mind suddenly became glowing, animated, and cheerful. I thought that, +by this time, the most formidable difficulties of my undertaking were +surmounted; and I could not believe that, after having effected so much, +I should find any thing invincible in what remained to be done. I +recollected the confinement I had undergone, and the fate that had +impended over me, with horror. Never did man feel more vividly, than I +felt at that moment, the sweets of liberty. Never did man more +strenuously prefer poverty with independence, to the artificial +allurements of a life of slavery. I stretched forth my arms with +rapture; I clapped my hands one upon the other, and exclaimed, "Ah, this +is indeed to be a man! These wrists were lately galled with fetters; all +my motions, whether I rose up or sat down, were echoed to with the +clanking of chains; I was tied down like a wild beast, and could not +move but in a circle of a few feet in circumference. Now I can run fleet +as a greyhound, and leap like a young roe upon the mountains. Oh, God! +(if God there be that condescends to record the lonely beatings of an +anxious heart) thou only canst tell with what delight a prisoner, just +broke forth from his dungeon, hugs the blessings of new-found liberty! +Sacred and indescribable moment, when man regains his rights! But lately +I held my life in jeopardy, because one man was unprincipled enough to +assert what he knew to be false; I was destined to suffer an early and +inexorable death from the hands of others, because none of them had +penetration enough to distinguish from falsehood, what I uttered with +the entire conviction of a full-fraught heart! Strange, that men, from +age to age, should consent to hold their lives at the breath of another, +merely that each in his turn may have a power of acting the tyrant +according to law! Oh, God! give me poverty! shower upon me all the +imaginary hardships of human life! I will receive them all with +thankfulness. Turn me a prey to the wild beasts of the desert, so I be +never again the victim of man, dressed in the gore-dripping robes of +authority! Suffer me at least to call life, and the pursuits of life, my +own! Let me hold it at the mercy of the elements, of the hunger of +beasts, or the revenge of barbarians, but not of the cold-blooded +prudence of monopolists and kings!"--How enviable was the enthusiasm +which could thus furnish me with energy, in the midst of hunger, +poverty, and universal desertion! + +I had now walked at least six miles. At first I carefully avoided the +habitations that lay in my way, and feared to be seen by any of the +persons to whom they belonged, lest it should in any degree furnish a +clue to the researches of my pursuers. As I went forward, I conceived it +might be proper to relax a part of my precaution. At this time I +perceived several persons coming out of a thicket close to me. I +immediately considered this circumstance as rather favourable than the +contrary. It was necessary for me to avoid entering any of the towns and +villages in the vicinity. It was however full time that I should procure +for myself some species of refreshment, and by no means improbable that +these men might be in some way assisting to me in that respect. In my +situation it appeared to me indifferent what might be their employment +or profession. I had little to apprehend from thieves, and I believed +that they, as well as honest men, could not fail to have some compassion +for a person under my circumstances. I therefore rather threw myself in +their way than avoided them. + +They were thieves. One of the company cried out, "Who goes there? +stand!" I accosted them; "Gentlemen," said I, "I am a poor traveller, +almost"--While I spoke, they came round me; and he that had first +hailed me, said, "Damn me, tip us none of your palaver; we have heard +that story of a poor traveller any time these five years. Come, down +with your dust! let us see what you have got!"--"Sir," I replied, "I +have not a shilling in the world, and am more than half starved +beside."--"Not a shilling!" answered my assailant, "what, I suppose you +are as poor as a thief? But, if you have not money, you have clothes, +and those you must resign." + +"My clothes!" rejoined I with indignation, "you cannot desire such a +thing. Is it not enough that I am pennyless? I have been all night upon +the open heath. It is now the second day that I have not eaten a morsel +of bread. Would you strip me naked to the weather in the midst of this +depopulated forest? No, no, you are men! The same hatred of oppression, +that arms you against the insolence of wealth, will teach you to relieve +those who are perishing like me. For God's sake, give me food! do not +strip me of the comforts I still possess!" + +While I uttered this apostrophe, the unpremeditated eloquence of +sentiment, I could perceive by their gestures, though the day had not +yet begun to dawn, that the feelings of one or two of the company +appeared to take my part. The man, who had already undertaken to be +their spokesman, perceived the same thing; and, excited either by the +brutality of his temper or the love of command, hastened to anticipate +the disgrace of a defeat. He brushed suddenly up to me, and by main +force pushed me several feet from the place where I stood. The shock I +received drove me upon a second of the gang, not one of those who had +listened to my expostulation; and he repeated the brutality. My +indignation was strongly excited by this treatment; and, after being +thrust backward and forward two or three times in this manner, I broke +through my assailants, and turned round to defend myself. The first that +advanced within my reach, was my original enemy. In the present moment I +listened to nothing but the dictates of passion, and I laid him at his +length on the earth. I was immediately assailed with sticks and +bludgeons on all sides, and presently received a blow that almost +deprived me of my senses. The man I had knocked down was now upon his +feet again, and aimed a stroke at me with a cutlass as I fell, which +took place in a deep wound upon my neck and shoulder. He was going to +repeat his blow. The two who had seemed to waver at first in their +animosity, afterwards appeared to me to join in the attack, urged either +by animal sympathy or the spirit of imitation. One of them however, as I +afterwards, understood seized the arm of the man who was going to strike +me a second time with his cutlass, and who would otherwise probably have +put an end to my existence. I could hear the words, "Damn it, enough, +enough! that is too bad, Gines!"--"How so?" replied a second voice; "he +will but pine here upon the forest, and die by inches: it will be an act +of charity to put him out of his pain."--It will be imagined that I was +not uninterested in this sort of debate. I made an effort to speak; my +voice failed me. I stretched out one hand with a gesture of entreaty. +"You shall not strike, by God!" said one of the voices; "why should we +be murderers?"--The side of forbearance at length prevailed. They +therefore contented themselves with stripping me of my coat and +waistcoat, and rolling me into a dry ditch. They then left me totally +regardless of my distressed condition, and the plentiful effusion of +blood, which streamed from my wound. + + + + +CHAPTER II. + + +In this woeful situation, though extremely weak, I was not deprived of +sense. I tore my shirt from my naked body, and endeavoured, with some +success, to make of it a bandage to staunch the flowing of the blood. I +then exerted myself to crawl up the side of the ditch. I had scarcely +effected the latter, when, with equal surprise and joy, I perceived a +man advancing at no great distance. I called for help as well as I +could. The man came towards me with evident signs of compassion, and the +appearance I exhibited was indeed sufficiently calculated to excite it. +I had no hat. My hair was dishevelled, and the ends of the locks clotted +with blood. My shirt was wrapped about my neck and shoulders, and was +plentifully stained with red. My body, which was naked to my middle, was +variegated with streams of blood; nor had my lower garments, which were +white, by any means escaped. + +"For God's sake, my good fellow!" said he, with a tone of the greatest +imaginable kindness, "how came you thus?" and, saying this, he lifted me +up, and set me on my feet. "Can you stand?" added he, doubtfully. "Oh, +yes, very well," I replied. Having received this answer, he quitted me, +and began to take off his own coat, that he might cover me from the +cold. I had however over-rated my strength, and was no sooner left to +myself than I reeled, and fell almost at my length upon the ground. But +I broke my fall by stretching out my sound arm, and again raised myself +upon my knees. My benefactor now covered me, raised me, and, bidding me +lean upon him, told me he would presently conduct me to a place where I +should be taken care of. Courage is a capricious property; and, though +while I had no one to depend upon but myself, I possessed a mine of +seemingly inexhaustible fortitude, yet no sooner did I find this +unexpected sympathy on the part of another, than my resolution appeared +to give way, and I felt ready to faint. My charitable conductor +perceived this, and every now and then encouraged me, in a manner so +cheerful, so good humoured and benevolent, equally free from the torture +of droning expostulation, and the weakness of indulgence, that I thought +myself under the conduct of an angel rather than a man. I could perceive +that his behaviour had in it nothing of boorishness, and that he was +thoroughly imbued with the principles of affectionate civility. + +We walked about three quarters of a mile, and that not towards the open, +but the most uncouth and unfrequented part of the forest. We crossed a +place which had once been a moat, but which was now in some parts dry, +and in others contained a little muddy and stagnated water. Within the +enclosure of this moat, I could only discover a pile of ruins, and +several walls, the upper part of which seemed to overhang their +foundations, and to totter to their ruin. After having entered however +with my conductor through an archway, and passed along a winding +passage that was perfectly dark, we came to a stand. + +At the upper end of this passage was a door, which I was unable to +perceive. My conductor knocked at the door, and was answered by a voice +from within, which, for body and force, might have been the voice of a +man, but with a sort of female sharpness and acidity, enquiring, "Who is +there?" Satisfaction was no sooner given on this point, than I heard two +bolts pushed back, and the door unlocked. The apartment opened, and we +entered. The interior of this habitation by no means corresponded with +the appearance of my protector, but, on the contrary, wore the face of +discomfort, carelessness, and dirt. The only person I saw within was a +woman, rather advanced in life, and whose person had I know not what of +extraordinary and loathsome. Her eyes were red and blood-shot; her hair +was pendent in matted and shaggy tresses about her shoulders; her +complexion swarthy, and of the consistency of parchment; her form spare, +and her whole body, her arms in particular, uncommonly vigorous and +muscular. Not the milk of human kindness, but the feverous blood of +savage ferocity, seemed to flow from her heart; and her whole figure +suggested an idea of unmitigable energy, and an appetite gorged in +malevolence. This infernal Thalestris had no sooner cast her eyes upon +us as we entered, than she exclaimed in a discordant and discontented +voice, "What have we got here? this is not one of our people!" My +conductor, without answering this apostrophe, bade her push an easy +chair which stood in one corner, and set it directly before the fire. +This she did with apparent reluctance, murmuring, "Ah! you are at your +old tricks; I wonder what such folks as we have to do with charity! It +will be the ruin of us at last, I can see that!"--"Hold your tongue, +beldam!" said he, with a stern significance of manner, "and fetch one of +my best shirts, a waistcoat, and some dressings." Saying this, he at the +same time put into her hand a small bunch of keys. In a word, he treated +me with as much kindness as if he had been my father. He examined my +wound, washed and dressed it; at the same time that the old woman, by +his express order, prepared for me such nourishment as he thought most +suitable to my weak and languid condition. + +These operations were no sooner completed than my benefactor recommended +to me to retire to rest, and preparations were making for that purpose, +when suddenly a trampling of feet was heard, succeeded by a knock at the +door. The old woman opened the door with the same precautions as had +been employed upon our arrival, and immediately six or seven persons +tumultuously entered the apartment. Their appearance was different, some +having the air of mere rustics, and others that of a tarnished sort of +gentry. All had a feature of boldness, inquietude, and disorder, +extremely unlike any thing I had before observed in such a group. But my +astonishment was still increased, when upon a second glance I perceived +something in the general air of several of them, and of one in +particular, that persuaded me they were the gang from which I had just +escaped, and this one the antagonist by whose animosity I was so near +having been finally destroyed. I imagined they had entered the hovel +with a hostile intention, that my benefactor was upon the point of being +robbed, and I probably murdered. + +This suspicion however was soon removed. They addressed my conductor +with respect, under the appellation of captain. They were boisterous and +noisy in their remarks and exclamations, but their turbulence was +tempered by a certain deference to his opinion and authority. I could +observe in the person who had been my active opponent some awkwardness +and irresolution as he first perceived me, which he dismissed with a +sort of effort, exclaiming, "Who the devil is here?" There was something +in the tone of this apostrophe that roused the attention of my +protector. He looked at the speaker with a fixed and penetrating glance, +and then said, "Nay, Gines, do you know? Did you ever see the person +before?"--"Curse it, Gines!" interrupted a third, "you are damnably out +of luck. They say dead men walk, and you see there is some truth in +it."--"Truce with your impertinence, Jeckols!" replied my protector: +"this is no proper occasion for a joke. Answer me, Gines, were you the +cause of this young man being left naked and wounded this bitter morning +upon the forest?" + +"Mayhap I was. What then?" + +"What provocation could induce you to so cruel a treatment?" + +"Provocation enough. He had no money." + +"What, did you use him thus, without so much as being irritated by any +resistance on his part?" + +"Yes, he did resist. I only hustled him, and he had the impudence to +strike me." + +"Gines! you are an incorrigible fellow." + +"Pooh, what signifies what I am? You, with your compassion, and your +fine feelings, will bring us all to the gallows." + +"I have nothing to say to you; I have no hopes of you! Comrades, it is +for you to decide upon the conduct of this man as you think proper. You +know how repeated his offences have been; you know what pains I have +taken to mend him. Our profession is the profession of justice." [It is +thus that the prejudices of men universally teach them to colour the +most desperate cause to which they have determined to adhere.] "We, who +are thieves without a licence, are at open war with another set of men +who are thieves according to law. With such a cause then to bear us out, +shall we stain it with cruelty, malice, and revenge? A thief is, of +course, a man living among his equals; I do not pretend therefore to +assume any authority among you; act as you think proper; but, so far as +relates to myself, I vote that Gines be expelled from among us as a +disgrace to our society." + +This proposition seemed to meet the general sense. It was easy to +perceive that the opinion of the rest coincided with that of their +leader; notwithstanding which a few of them hesitated as to the conduct +to be pursued. In the mean time Gines muttered something in a surly and +irresolute way, about taking care how they provoked him. This +insinuation instantly roused the courage of my protector, and his eyes +flashed with contempt. + +"Rascal!" said he, "do you menace us? Do you think we will be your +slaves? No, no, do your worst! Go to the next justice of the peace, and +impeach us; I can easily believe you are capable of it. Sir, when we +entered into this gang, we were not such fools as not to know that we +entered upon a service of danger. One of its dangers consists in the +treachery of fellows like you. But we did not enter at first to flinch +now. Did you believe that we would live in hourly fear of you, tremble +at your threats, and compromise, whenever you should so please, with +your insolence? That would be a blessed life indeed! I would rather see +my flesh torn piecemeal from my bones! Go, sir! I defy you! You dare not +do it! You dare not sacrifice these gallant fellows to your rage, and +publish yourself to all the world a traitor and a scoundrel! If you do, +you will punish yourself, not us! Begone!" + +The intrepidity of the leader communicated itself to the rest of the +company. Gines easily saw that there was no hope of bringing them over +to a contrary sentiment. After a short pause, he answered, "I did not +mean--No, damn it! I will not snivel neither. I was always true to my +principles, and a friend to you all. But since you are resolved to turn +me out, why--good bye to you!" + +The expulsion of this man produced a remarkable improvement in the whole +gang. Those who were before inclined to humanity, assumed new energy in +proportion as they saw such sentiments likely to prevail. They had +before suffered themselves to be overborne by the boisterous insolence +of their antagonist; but now they adopted, and with success, a different +conduct. Those who envied the ascendancy of their comrade, and therefore +imitated his conduct, began to hesitate in their career. Stories were +brought forward of the cruelty and brutality of Gines both to men and +animals, which had never before reached the ear of the leader. The +stories I shall not repeat. They could excite only emotions of +abhorrence and disgust; and some of them argued a mind of such a stretch +of depravity, as to many readers would appear utterly incredible; and +yet this man had his virtues. He was enterprising, persevering, and +faithful. + +His removal was a considerable benefit to me. It would have been no +small hardship to have been turned adrift immediately under my +unfavourable circumstances, with the additional disadvantage of the +wound I had received; and yet I could scarcely have ventured to remain +under the same roof with a man, to whom my appearance was as a guilty +conscience, perpetually reminding him of his own offence, and the +displeasure of his leader. His profession accustomed him to a certain +degree of indifference to consequences, and indulgence to the sallies of +passion; and he might easily have found his opportunity to insult or +injure me, when I should have had nothing but my own debilitated +exertions to protect me. + +Freed from this danger, I found my situation sufficiently fortunate for +a man under my circumstances. It was attended with all the advantages +for concealment my fondest imagination could have hoped; and it was by +no means destitute of the benefits which arise from kindness and +humanity. Nothing could be more unlike than the thieves I had seen +in ---- jail, and the thieves of my new residence. The latter were +generally full of cheerfulness and merriment. They could expatiate +freely wherever they thought proper. They could form plans and execute +them. They consulted their inclinations. They did not impose upon +themselves the task, as is too often the case in human society, of +seeming tacitly to approve that from which they suffered most; or, which +is worst, of persuading themselves that all the wrongs they suffered +were right; but were at open war with their oppressors. On the contrary, +the imprisoned felons I had lately seen were shut up like wild beasts in +a cage, deprived of activity, and palsied with indolence. The occasional +demonstrations that still remained of their former enterprising life +were the starts and convulsions of disease, not the meditated and +consistent exertions of a mind in health. They had no more of hope, of +project, of golden and animated dreams, but were reserved to the most +dismal prospects, and forbidden to think upon any other topic. It is +true, that these two scenes were parts of one whole, the one the +consummation, the hourly to be expected successor of the other. But the +men I now saw were wholly inattentive to this, and in that respect +appeared to hold no commerce with reflection or reason. + +I might in one view, as I have said, congratulate myself upon my present +residence; it answered completely the purposes of concealment. It was +the seat of merriment and hilarity; but the hilarity that characterised +it produced no correspondent feelings in my bosom. The persons who +composed this society had each of them cast off all control from +established principle; their trade was terror, and their constant object +to elude the vigilance of the community. The influence of these +circumstances was visible in their character. I found among them +benevolence and kindness: they were strongly susceptible of emotions of +generosity. But, as their situation was precarious, their dispositions +were proportionably fluctuating. Inured to the animosity of their +species, they were irritable and passionate. Accustomed to exercise +harshness towards the subject of their depredations, they did not always +confine their brutality within that scope. They were habituated to +consider wounds and bludgeons and stabbing as the obvious mode of +surmounting every difficulty. Uninvolved in the debilitating routine of +human affairs, they frequently displayed an energy which, from every +impartial observer, would have extorted veneration. Energy is perhaps of +all qualities the most valuable; and a just political system would +possess the means of extracting from it, thus circumstanced, its +beneficial qualities, instead of consigning it, as now, to +indiscriminate destruction. We act like the chemist, who should reject +the finest ore, and employ none but what was sufficiently debased to fit +it immediately for the vilest uses. But the energy of these men, such as +I beheld it, was in the highest degree misapplied, unassisted by liberal +and enlightened views, and directed only to the most narrow and +contemptible purposes. + +The residence I have been describing might to many persons have appeared +attended with intolerable inconveniences. But, exclusively of its +advantages as a field for speculation, it was Elysium, compared with +that from which I had just escaped. Displeasing company, incommodious +apartments, filthiness, and riot, lost the circumstance by which they +could most effectually disgust, when I was not compelled to remain with +them. All hardships I could patiently endure, in comparison with the +menace of a violent and untimely death. There was no suffering that I +could not persuade myself to consider as trivial, except that which +flowed from the tyranny, the frigid precaution, or the inhuman revenge +of my own species. + +My recovery advanced in the most favourable manner. The attention and +kindness of my protector were incessant, and the rest caught the spirit +from his example. The old woman who superintended the household still +retained her animosity. She considered me as the cause of the expulsion +of Gines from the fraternity. Gines had been the object of her +particular partiality; and, zealous as she was for the public concern, +she thought an old and experienced sinner for a raw probationer but an +ill exchange. Add to which, that her habits inclined her to moroseness +and discontent, and that persons of her complexion seem unable to exist +without some object upon which to pour out the superfluity of their +gall. She lost no opportunity, upon the most trifling occasion, of +displaying her animosity; and ever and anon eyed me with a furious +glance of canine hunger for my destruction. Nothing was more evidently +mortifying to her, than the procrastination of her malice; nor could she +bear to think that a fierceness so gigantic and uncontrollable should +show itself in nothing more terrific than the pigmy spite of a +chambermaid. For myself, I had been accustomed to the warfare of +formidable adversaries, and the encounter of alarming dangers; and what +I saw of her spleen had not power sufficient to disturb my tranquillity. + +As I recovered, I told my story, except so far as related to the +detection of Mr. Falkland's eventful secret, to my protector. That +particular I could not, as yet, prevail upon myself to disclose, even in +a situation like this, which seemed to preclude the possibility of its +being made use of to the disadvantage of my persecutor. My present +auditor however, whose habits of thinking were extremely opposite to +those of Mr. Forester, did not, from the obscurity which flowed from +this reserve, deduce any unfavourable conclusion. His penetration was +such, as to afford little room for an impostor to hope to mislead him by +a fictitious statement, and he confided in that penetration. So +confiding, the simplicity and integrity of my manner carried conviction +to his mind, and insured his good opinion and friendship. + +He listened to my story with eagerness, and commented on the several +parts as I related them. He said, that this was only one fresh instance +of the tyranny and perfidiousness exercised by the powerful members of +the community, against those who were less privileged than themselves. +Nothing could be more clear, than their readiness to sacrifice the human +species at large to their meanest interest, or wildest caprice. Who that +saw the situation in its true light would wait till their oppressors +thought fit to decree their destruction, and not take arms in their +defence while it was yet in their power? Which was most meritorious, +the unresisting and dastardly submission of a slave, or the enterprise +and gallantry of the man who dared to assert his claims? Since, by the +partial administration of our laws, innocence, when power was armed +against it, had nothing better to hope for than guilt, what man of true +courage would fail to set these laws at defiance, and, if he must suffer +by their injustice, at least take care that he had first shown his +contempt of their yoke? For himself, he should certainly never have +embraced his present calling, had he not been stimulated to it by these +cogent and irresistible reasons; and he hoped, as experience had so +forcibly brought a conviction of this sort to my mind, that he should +for the future have the happiness to associate me to his pursuits.--It +will presently be seen with what event these hopes were attended. + +Numerous were the precautions exercised by the gang of thieves with whom +I now resided, to elude the vigilance of the satellites of justice. It +was one of their rules to commit no depredations but at a considerable +distance from the place of their residence; and Gines had transgressed +this regulation in the attack to which I was indebted for my present +asylum. After having possessed themselves of any booty, they took care, +in the sight of the persons whom they had robbed, to pursue a route as +nearly as possible opposite to that which led to their true haunts. The +appearance of their place of residence, together with its environs, was +peculiarly desolate avid forlorn, and it had the reputation of being +haunted. The old woman I have described had long been its inhabitant, +and was commonly supposed to be its only inhabitant; and her person well +accorded with the rural ideas of a witch. Her lodgers never went out or +came in but with the utmost circumspection, and generally by night. The +lights which were occasionally seen from various parts of her +habitation, were, by the country people, regarded with horror as +supernatural; and if the noise of revelry at any time saluted their +ears, it was imagined to proceed from a carnival of devils. With all +these advantages, the thieves did not venture to reside here but by +intervals: they frequently absented themselves for months, and removed +to a different part of the country. The old woman sometimes attended +them in these transportations, and sometimes remained; but in all cases +her decampment took place either sooner or later than theirs, so that +the nicest observer could scarcely have traced any connection between +her reappearance, and the alarms of depredation that were frequently +given; and the festival of demons seemed, to the terrified rustics, +indifferently to take place whether she were present or absent. + + + + +CHAPTER III. + + +One day, while I continued in this situation, a circumstance occurred +which involuntarily attracted my attention. Two of our people had been +sent to a town at some distance, for the purpose of procuring us the +things of which we were in want. After having delivered these to our +landlady, they retired to one corner of the room; and, one of them +pulling a printed paper from his pocket, they mutually occupied +themselves in examining its contents. I was sitting in an easy chair by +the fire, being considerably better than I had been, though still in a +weak and languid state. Having read for a considerable time, they looked +at me, and then at the paper, and then at me again. They then went out +of the room together, as if to consult without interruption upon +something which that paper suggested to them. Some time after they +returned; and my protector, who had been absent upon the former +occasion, entered the room at the same instant. + +"Captain!" said one of them with an air of pleasure, "look here! we have +found a prize! I believe it is as good as a bank-note of a hundred +guineas." + +Mr. Raymond (that was his name) took the paper, and read. He paused for +a moment. He then crushed the paper in his hand; and, turning to the +person from whom he had received it, said, with the tone of a man +confident in the success of his reasons,-- + +"What use have you for these hundred guineas? Are you in want? Are you +in distress? Can you be contented to purchase them at the price of +treachery--of violating the laws of hospitality?" + +"Faith, captain, I do not very well know. After having violated other +laws, I do not see why we should be frightened at an old saw. We pretend +to judge for ourselves, and ought to be above shrinking from a bugbear +of a proverb. Beside, this is a good deed, and I should think no more +harm of being the ruin of such a thief than of getting my dinner." + +"A thief! You talk of thieves!" + +"Not so fast, captain. God defend that I should say a word against +thieving as a general occupation! But one man steals in one way, and +another in another. For my part, I go upon the highway, and take from +any stranger I meet what, it is a hundred to one, he can very well +spare. I see nothing to be found fault with in that. But I have as much +conscience as another man. Because I laugh at assizes, and great wigs, +and the gallows, and because I will not be frightened from an innocent +action when the lawyers say me nay, does it follow that I am to have a +fellow-feeling for pilferers, and rascally servants, and people that +have neither justice nor principle? No; I have too much respect for the +trade not to be a foe to interlopers, and people that so much the more +deserve my hatred, because the world calls them by my name." + +"You are wrong, Larkins! You certainly ought not to employ against +people that you hate, supposing your hatred to be reasonable, the +instrumentality of that law which in your practice you defy. Be +consistent. Either be the friend of the law, or its adversary. Depend +upon it that, wherever there are laws at all, there will be laws against +such people as you and me. Either therefore we all of us deserve the +vengeance of the law, or law is not the proper instrument for correcting +the misdeeds of mankind. I tell you this, because I would fain have you +aware, that an informer or a king's evidence, a man who takes advantage +of the confidence of another in order to betray him, who sells the life +of his neighbour for money, or, coward-like, upon any pretence calls in +the law to do that for him which he cannot or dares not do for himself, +is the vilest of rascals. But in the present case, if your reasons were +the best in the world, they do not apply." + +While Mr. Raymond was speaking, the rest of the gang came into the room. +He immediately turned to them, and said,-- + +"My friends, here is a piece of intelligence that Larkins has just +brought in which, with his leave, I will lay before you." + +Then unfolding the paper he had received, he continued: "This is the +description of a felon, with the offer of a hundred guineas for his +apprehension. Larking picked it up at ----. By the time and other +circumstances, but particularly by the minute description of his +person, there can be no doubt but the object of it is our young friend, +whose life I was a while ago the instrument of saving. He is charged +here with having taken advantage of the confidence of his patron and +benefactor to rob him of property to a large amount. Upon this charge he +was committed to the county jail, from whence he made his escape about a +fortnight ago, without venturing to stand his trial; a circumstance +which is stated by the advertiser as tantamount to a confession of his +guilt. + +"My friends, I was acquainted with the particulars of this story some +time before. This lad let me into his history, at a time that he could +not possibly foresee that he should stand in need of that precaution as +an antidote against danger. He is not guilty of what is laid to his +charge. Which of you is so ignorant as to suppose, that his escape is +any confirmation of his guilt? Who ever thinks, when he is apprehended +for trial, of his innocence or guilt as being at all material to the +issue? Who ever was fool enough to volunteer a trial, where those who +are to decide think more of the horror of the thing of which he is +accused, than whether he were the person that did it; and where the +nature of our motives is to be collected from a set of ignorant +witnesses, that no wise man would trust for a fair representation of the +most indifferent action of his life? + +"The poor lad's story is a long one, and I will not trouble you with it +now. But from that story it is as clear as the day, that, because he +wished to leave the service of his master, because he had been perhaps a +little too inquisitive in his master's concerns, and because, as I +suspect, he had been trusted with some important secrets, his master +conceived an antipathy against him. The antipathy gradually proceeded +to such a length, as to induce the master to forge this vile accusation. +He seemed willing to hang the lad out of the way, rather than suffer him +to go where he pleased, or get beyond the reach of his power. Williams +has told me the story with such ingenuousness, that I am as sure that he +is guiltless of what they lay to his charge, as that I am so myself. +Nevertheless the man's servants who were called in to hear the +accusation, and his relation, who as justice of the peace made out the +mittimus, and who had the folly to think he could be impartial, gave it +on his side with one voice, and thus afforded Williams a sample of what +he had to expect in the sequel. + +"Larkins, who when he received this paper had no previous knowledge of +particulars, was for taking advantage of it for the purpose of earning +the hundred guineas. Are you of that mind now you have heard them? Will +you for so paltry a consideration deliver up the lamb into the jaws of +the wolf? Will you abet the purposes of this sanguinary rascal, who, not +contented with driving his late dependent from house and home, depriving +him of character and all the ordinary means of subsistence, and leaving +him almost without a refuge, still thirsts for his blood? If no other +person have the courage to set limits to the tyranny of courts of +justice, shall not we? Shall we, who earn our livelihood by generous +daring, be indebted for a penny to the vile artifices of the informer? +Shall we, against whom the whole species is in arms, refuse our +protection to an individual, more exposed to, but still less deserving +of, their persecution than ourselves?" + +The representation of the captain produced an instant effect upon the +whole company. They all exclaimed, "Betray him! No, not for worlds! He +is safe. We will protect him at the hazard of our lives. If fidelity +and honour be banished from thieves, where shall they find refuge upon +the face of the earth?"[F] Larkins in particular thanked the captain for +his interference, and swore that he would rather part with his right +hand than injure so worthy a lad or assist such an unheard-of villainy. +Saying this, he took me by the hand and bade me fear nothing. Under +their roof no harm should ever befal me; and, even if the understrappers +of the law should discover my retreat, they would to a man die in my +defence, sooner than a hair of my head should be hurt. I thanked him +most sincerely for his good-will; but I was principally struck with the +fervent benevolence of my benefactor. I told them, I found that my +enemies were inexorable, and would never be appeased but with my blood; +and I assured them with the most solemn and earnest veracity, that I had +done nothing to deserve the persecution which was exercised against me. + +[Footnote F: This seems to be the parody of a celebrated saying of John +King of France, who was taken prisoner by the Black Prince at the battle +of Poitiers.] + +The spirit and energy of Mr. Raymond had been such as to leave no part +for me to perform in repelling this unlooked-for danger. Nevertheless, +it left a very serious impression upon my mind. I had always placed some +confidence in the returning equity of Mr. Falkland. Though he persecuted +me with bitterness, I could not help believing that he did it +unwillingly, and I was persuaded it would not be for ever. A man, whose +original principles had been so full of rectitude and honour, could not +fail at some time to recollect the injustice of his conduct, and to +remit his asperity. This idea had been always present to me, and had in +no small degree conspired to instigate my exertions. I said, "I will +convince my persecutor that I am of more value than that I should be +sacrificed purely by way of precaution." These expectations on my part +had been encouraged by Mr. Falkland's behaviour upon the question of my +imprisonment, and by various particulars which had occurred since. + +But this new incident gave the subject a totally different appearance. I +saw him, not contented with blasting my reputation, confining me for a +period in jail, and reducing me to the situation of a houseless +vagabond, still continuing his pursuit under these forlorn circumstances +with unmitigable cruelty. Indignation and resentment seemed now for the +first time to penetrate my mind. I knew his misery so well, I was so +fully acquainted with its cause, and strongly impressed with the idea of +its being unmerited, that, while I suffered deeply, I still continued to +pity, rather than hate my persecutor. But this incident introduced some +change into my feelings. I said, "Surely he might now believe that he +had sufficiently disarmed me, and might at length suffer me to be at +peace. At least, ought he not to be contented to leave me to my fate, +the perilous and uncertain condition of an escaped felon, instead of +thus whetting the animosity and vigilance of my countrymen against me? +Were his interference on my behalf in opposition to the stern severity +of Mr. Forester, and his various acts of kindness since, a mere part +that he played in order to lull me into patience? Was he perpetually +haunted with the fear of an ample retaliation, and for that purpose did +he personate remorse, at the very moment that he was secretly keeping +every engine at play that could secure my destruction?" The very +suspicion of such a fact filled me with inexpressible horror, and +struck a sudden chill through every fibre of my frame. + +My wound was by this time completely healed, and it became absolutely +necessary that I should form some determination respecting the future. +My habits of thinking were such as gave me an uncontrollable repugnance +to the vocation of my hosts. I did not indeed feel that aversion and +abhorrence to the men which are commonly entertained. I saw and +respected their good qualities and their virtues. I was by no means +inclined to believe them worse men, or more hostile in their +dispositions to the welfare of their species, than the generality of +those that look down upon them with most censure. But, though I did not +cease to love them as individuals, my eyes were perfectly open to their +mistakes. If I should otherwise have been in danger of being misled, it +was my fortune to have studied felons in a jail before I studied them in +their state of comparative prosperity; and this was an infallible +antidote to the poison. I saw that in this profession were exerted +uncommon energy, ingenuity, and fortitude, and I could not help +recollecting how admirably beneficial such qualities might be made in +the great theatre of human affairs; while, in their present direction, +they were thrown away upon purposes diametrically at war with the first +interests of human society. Nor were their proceedings less injurious to +their own interest than incompatible with the general welfare. The man +who risks or sacrifices his life for the public cause, is rewarded with +the testimony of an approving conscience; but persons who wantonly defy +the necessary, though atrociously exaggerated, precautions of government +in the matter of property, at the same time that they commit an +alarming hostility against the whole, are, as to their own concerns, +scarcely less absurd and self-neglectful than the man who should set +himself up as a mark for a file of musqueteers to shoot at. + +Viewing the subject in this light, I not only determined that I would +have no share in their occupation myself, but thought I could not do +less, in return for the benefits I had received from them, than +endeavour to dissuade them from an employment in which they must +themselves be the greatest sufferers. My expostulation met with a +various reception. All the persons to whom it was addressed had been +tolerably successful in persuading themselves of the innocence of their +calling; and what remained of doubt in their mind was smothered, and, so +to speak, laboriously forgotten. Some of them laughed at my arguments, +as a ridiculous piece of missionary quixotism. Others, and particularly +our captain, repelled them with the boldness of a man that knows he has +got the strongest side. But this sentiment of ease and self-satisfaction +did not long remain. They had been used to arguments derived from +religion and the sacredness of law. They had long ago shaken these from +them as so many prejudices. But my view of the subject appealed to +principles which they could not contest, and had by no means the air of +that customary reproof which is for ever dinned in our ears without +finding one responsive chord in our hearts. Urged, as they now were, +with objections unexpected and cogent, some of those to whom I addressed +them began to grow peevish and impatient of the intrusive remonstrance. +But this was by no means the case with Mr. Raymond. He was possessed of +a candour that I have seldom seen equalled. He was surprised to hear +objections so powerful to that which, as a matter of speculation, he +believed he had examined on all sides. He revolved them with +impartiality and care. He admitted them slowly, but he at length fully +admitted them. He had now but one rejoinder in reserve. + +"Alas! Williams," said he, "it would have been fortunate for me if these +views had been presented to me, previously to my embracing my present +profession. It is now too late. Those very laws which, by a perception +of their iniquity, drove me to what I am, preclude my return. God, we +are told, judges of men by what they are at the period of arraignment, +and whatever be their crimes, if they have seen and abjured the folly of +those crimes, receives them to favour. But the institutions of countries +that profess to worship this God admit no such distinctions. They leave +no room for amendment, and seem to have a brutal delight in confounding +the demerits of offenders. It signifies not what is the character of the +individual at the hour of trial. How changed, how spotless, and how +useful, avails him nothing. If they discover at the distance of +fourteen[G] or of forty years[H] an action for which the law ordains +that his life shall be the forfeit, though the interval should have been +spent with the purity of a saint and the devotedness of a patriot, they +disdain to enquire into it. What then can I do? Am I not compelled to go +on in folly, having once begun?" + +[Footnote G: Eugene Aram. See Annual Register for 1759.] + +[Footnote H: William Andrew Home. Ibid.] + + + + +CHAPTER IV. + + +I Was extremely affected by this plea. I could only answer, that Mr. +Raymond must himself be the best judge of the course it became him to +hold; I trusted the case was not so desperate as he imagined. + +This subject was pursued no further, and was in some degree driven from +my thoughts by an incident of a very extraordinary nature. + +I have already mentioned the animosity that was entertained against me +by the infernal portress of this solitary mansion. Gines, the expelled +member of the gang, had been her particular favourite. She submitted to +his exile indeed, because her genius felt subdued by the energy and +inherent superiority of Mr. Raymond; but she submitted with murmuring +and discontent. Not daring to resent the conduct of the principal in +this affair, she collected all the bitterness of her spirit against me. + +To the unpardonable offence I had thus committed in the first instance, +were added the reasonings I had lately offered against the profession of +robbery. Robbery was a fundamental article in the creed of this hoary +veteran, and she listened to my objections with the same unaffected +astonishment and horror that an old woman of other habits would listen +to one who objected to the agonies and dissolution of the Creator of the +world, or to the garment of imputed righteousness prepared to envelope +the souls of the elect. Like the religious bigot, she was sufficiently +disposed to avenge a hostility against her opinions with the weapons of +sublunary warfare. + +Meanwhile I had smiled at the impotence of her malice, as an object of +contempt rather than alarm. She perceived, as I imagine, the slight +estimation in which I held her, and this did not a little increase the +perturbation of her thoughts. + +One day I was left alone, with no other person in the house than this +swarthy sybil. The thieves had set out upon an expedition about two +hours after sunset on the preceding evening, and had not returned, as +they were accustomed to do, before day-break the next morning. This was +a circumstance that sometimes occurred, and therefore did not produce +any extraordinary alarm. At one time the scent of prey would lead them +beyond the bounds they had prescribed themselves, and at another the +fear of pursuit: the life of a thief is always uncertain. The old woman +had been preparing during the night for the meal to which they would +expect to sit down as soon as might be after their return. + +For myself, I had learned from their habits to be indifferent to the +regular return of the different parts of the day, and in some degree to +turn day into night, and night into day. I had been now several weeks in +this residence, and the season was considerably advanced. I had passed +some hours during the night in ruminating on my situation. The character +and manners of the men among whom I lived were disgusting to me. Their +brutal ignorance, their ferocious habits, and their coarse behaviour, +instead of becoming more tolerable by custom, hourly added force to my +original aversion. The uncommon vigour of their minds, and acuteness of +their invention in the business they pursued, compared with the +odiousness of that business and their habitual depravity, awakened in me +sensations too painful to be endured. Moral disapprobation, at least in +a mind unsubdued by philosophy, I found to be one of the most fertile +sources of disquiet and uneasiness. From this pain the society of Mr. +Raymond by no means relieved me. He was indeed eminently superior to the +vices of the rest; but I did not less exquisitely feel how much he was +out of his place, how disproportionably associated, or how contemptibly +employed. I had attempted to counteract the errors under which he and +his companions laboured; but I had found the obstacles that presented +themselves greater than I had imagined. + +What was I to do? Was I to wait the issue of this my missionary +undertaking, or was I to withdraw myself immediately? When I withdrew, +ought that to be done privately, or with an open avowal of my design, +and an endeavour to supply by the force of example what was deficient in +my arguments? It was certainly improper, as I declined all participation +in the pursuits of these men, did not pay my contribution of hazard to +the means by which they subsisted, and had no congeniality with their +habits, that I should continue to reside with them longer than was +absolutely necessary. There was one circumstance that rendered this +deliberation particularly pressing. They intended in a few days removing +from their present habitation, to a haunt to which they were accustomed, +in a distant county. If I did not propose to continue with them, it +would perhaps be wrong to accompany them in this removal. The state of +calamity to which my inexorable prosecutor had reduced me, had made the +encounter even of a den of robbers a fortunate adventure. But the time +that had since elapsed, had probably been sufficient to relax the +keenness of the quest that was made after me. I sighed for that solitude +and obscurity, that retreat from the vexations of the world and the +voice even of common fame, which I had proposed to myself when I broke +my prison. + +Such were the meditations which now occupied my mind. At length I grew +fatigued with continual contemplation, and to relieve myself pulled out +a pocket Horace, the legacy of my beloved Brightwel! I read with avidity +the epistle in which he so beautifully describes to Fuscus, the +grammarian, the pleasures of rural tranquillity and independence. By +this time the sun rose from behind the eastern hills, and I opened my +casement to contemplate it. The day commenced with peculiar brilliancy, +and was accompanied with all those charms which the poets of nature, as +they have been styled, have so much delighted to describe. There was +something in this scene, particularly as succeeding to the active +exertions of intellect, that soothed the mind to composure. Insensibly a +confused reverie invaded my faculties; I withdrew from the window, threw +myself upon the bed, and fell asleep. + +I do not recollect the precise images which in this situation passed +through my thoughts, but I know that they concluded with the idea of +some person, the agent of Mr. Falkland, approaching to assassinate me. +This thought had probably been suggested by the project I meditated of +entering once again into the world, and throwing myself within the +sphere of his possible vengeance. I imagined that the design of the +murderer was to come upon me by surprise, that I was aware of his +design, and yet, by some fascination, had no thought of evading it. I +heard the steps of the murderer as he cautiously approached. I seemed to +listen to his constrained yet audible breathings. He came up to the +corner where I was placed, and then stopped. + +The idea became too terrible; I started, opened my eyes, and beheld the +execrable hag before mentioned standing over me with a butcher's +cleaver. I shifted my situation with a speed that seemed too swift for +volition, and the blow already aimed at my skull sunk impotent upon the +bed. Before she could wholly recover her posture, I sprung upon her, +seized hold of the weapon, and had nearly wrested it from her. But in a +moment she resumed her strength and her desperate purpose, and we had a +furious struggle--she impelled by inveterate malice, and I resisting for +my life. Her vigour was truly Amazonian, and at no time had I ever +occasion to contend with a more formidable opponent. Her glance was +rapid and exact, and the shock with which from time to time she impelled +her whole frame inconceivably vehement. At length I was victorious, took +from her the instrument of death, and threw her upon the ground. Till +now the earnestness of her exertions had curbed her rage; but now she +gnashed with her teeth, her eyes seemed as if starting from their +sockets, and her body heaved with uncontrollable insanity. + +"Rascal! devil!" she exclaimed, "what do you mean to do to me?" + +Till now the scene had passed uninterrupted by a single word. + +"Nothing," I replied: "begone, infernal witch! and leave me to myself." + +"Leave you! No: I will thrust my fingers through your ribs, and drink +your blood!--You conquer me?--Ha, ha!--Yes, yes; you shall!--I will sit +upon you, and press you to hell! I will roast you with brimstone, and +dash your entrails into your eyes! Ha, ha!--ha!" + +Saying this, she sprung up, and prepared to attack me with redoubled +fury. I seized her hands, and compelled her to sit upon the bed. Thus +restrained, she continued to express the tumult of her thoughts by +grinning, by certain furious motions of her head, and by occasional +vehement efforts to disengage herself from my grasp. These contortions +and starts were of the nature of those fits in which the patients are +commonly supposed to need three or four persons to hold them. But I +found by experience that, under the circumstances in which I was +placed, my single strength was sufficient. The spectacle of her emotions +was inconceivably frightful. Her violence at length however began to +abate, and she became convinced of the hopelessness of the contest. + +"Let me go!" said she. "Why do you hold me? I will not be held." + +"I wanted you gone from the first," replied I. + +"Are you contented to go now?" + +"Yes, I tell you, misbegotten villain! Yes, rascal!" + +I immediately loosed my hold. She flew to the door, and, holding it in +her hand, said, "I will be the death of you yet: you shall not be your +own man twenty-four hours longer!" With these words she shut the door, +and locked it upon me. An action so totally unexpected startled me. +Whither was she gone? What was it she intended? To perish by the +machinations of such a hag as this was a thought not to be endured. +Death in any form brought upon us by surprise, and for which the mind +has had no time to prepare, is inexpressibly terrible. My thoughts +wandered in breathless horror and confusion, and all within was uproar. +I endeavoured to break the door, but in vain. I went round the room in +search of some tool to assist me. At length I rushed against it with a +desperate effort, to which it yielded, and had nearly thrown me from the +top of the stairs to the bottom. + +I descended with all possible caution and vigilance, I entered the room +which served us for a kitchen, but it was deserted. I searched every +other apartment in vain. I went out among the ruins; still I discovered +nothing of my late assailant. It was extraordinaiy: what could be become +of her? what was I to conclude from her disappearance! I reflected on +her parting menace,--"I should not be my own man twenty-four hours +longer." It was mysterious! it did not seem to be the menace of +assassination. Suddenly the recollection of the hand-bill brought to us +by Larkins rushed upon my memory. Was it possible that she alluded to +that in her parting words? Would she set out upon such an expedition by +herself? Was it not dangerous to the whole fraternity if, without the +smallest precaution, she should bring the officers of justice in the +midst of them? It was perhaps improbable she would engage in an +undertaking thus desperate. It was not however easy to answer for the +conduct of a person in her state of mind. Should I wait, and risk the +preservation of my liberty upon the issue? + +To this question I returned an immediate negative. I had resolved in a +short time to quit my present situation, and the difference of a little +sooner or a little later could not be very material. It promised to be +neither agreeable nor prudent for me to remain under the same roof with +a person who had manifested such a fierce and inexpiable hostility. But +the consideration which had inexpressibly the most weight with me, +belonged to the ideas of imprisonment, trial, and death. The longer they +had formed the subject of my contemplation, the more forcibly was I +impelled to avoid them. I had entered upon a system of action for that +purpose; I had already made many sacrifices; and I believed that I would +never miscarry in this project through any neglect of mine. The thought +of what was reserved for me by my persecutors sickened my very soul; and +the more intimately I was acquainted with oppression and injustice, the +more deeply was I penetrated with the abhorrence to which they are +entitled. + +Such were the reasons that determined me instantly, abruptly, without +leave-taking, or acknowledgment for the peculiar and repeated favours I +had received, to quit a habitation to which, for six weeks, I had +apparently been indebted for protection from trial, conviction, and an +ignominious death. I had come hither pennyless; I quitted my abode with +the sum of a few guineas in my possession, Mr. Raymond having insisted +upon my taking a share at the time that each man received his dividend +from the common stock. Though I had reason to suppose that the heat of +the pursuit against me would be somewhat remitted by the time that had +elapsed, the magnitude of the mischief that, in an unfavourable event, +might fall on me, determined me to neglect no imaginable precaution. I +recollected the hand-bill which was the source of my present alarm, and +conceived that one of the principal dangers which threatened me was the +recognition of my person, either by such as had previously known me, or +even by strangers. It seemed prudent therefore to disguise it as +effectually as I could. For this purpose I had recourse to a parcel of +tattered garments, that lay in a neglected corner of our habitation. The +disguise I chose was that of a beggar. Upon this plan, I threw off my +shirt; I tied a handkerchief about my head, with which I took care to +cover one of my eyes; over this I drew a piece of an old woollen +nightcap. I selected the worst apparel I could find; and this I reduced +to a still more deplorable condition, by rents that I purposely made in +various places. Thus equipped, I surveyed myself in a looking-glass. I +had rendered my appearance complete; nor would any one have suspected +that I was not one of the fraternity to which I assumed to belong. I +said, "This is the form in which tyranny and injustice oblige me to seek +for refuge: but better, a thousand times better is it, thus to incur +contempt with the dregs of mankind, than trust to the tender mercies of +our superiors!" + + + + +CHAPTER V. + + +The only rule that I laid down to myself in traversing the forest, was +to take a direction as opposite as possible to that which led to the +scene of my late imprisonment. After about two hours walking I arrived +at the termination of this ruder scene, and reached that part of the +country which is inclosed and cultivated. Here I sat down by the side of +a brook, and, pulling out a crust of bread which I had brought away with +me, rested and refreshed myself. While I continued in this place, I +began to ruminate upon the plan I should lay down for my future +proceedings; and my propensity now led me, as it had done in a former +instance, to fix upon the capital, which I believed, besides its other +recommendations, would prove the safest place for concealment. During +these thoughts I saw a couple of peasants passing at a small distance, +and enquired of them respecting the London road. By their description I +understood that the most immediate way would be to repass a part of the +forest, and that it would be necessary to approach considerably nearer +to the county-town than I was at the spot which I had at present +reached. I did not imagine that this could be a circumstance of +considerable importance. My disguise appeared to be a sufficient +security against momentary danger; and I therefore took a path, though +not the most direct one, which led towards the point they suggested. + +Some of the occurrences of the day are deserving to be mentioned. As I +passed along a road which lay in my way for a few miles, I saw a +carriage advancing in the opposite direction. I debated with myself for +a moment, whether I should pass it without notice, or should take this +occasion, by voice or gesture, of making an essay of my trade. This idle +disquisition was however speedily driven from my mind when I perceived +that the carriage was Mr. Falkland's. The suddenness of the encounter +struck me with terror, though perhaps it would have been difficult for +calm reflection to have discovered any considerable danger. I withdrew +from the road, and skulked behind a hedge till it should have completely +gone by. I was too much occupied with my own feelings, to venture to +examine whether or no the terrible adversary of my peace were in the +carriage. I persuaded myself that he was. I looked after the equipage, +and exclaimed, "There you may see the luxurious accommodations and +appendages of guilt, and here the forlornness that awaits upon +innocence!"--I was to blame to imagine that my case was singular in that +respect. I only mention it to show how tile most trivial circumstance +contributes to embitter the cup to the man of adversity. The thought +however was a transient one. I had learned this lesson from my +sufferings, not to indulge in the luxury of discontent. As my mind +recovered its tranquillity, I began to enquire whether the phenomenon I +had just seen could have any relation to myself. But though my mind was +extremely inquisitive and versatile in this respect, I could discover no +sufficient ground upon which to build a judgment. + +At night I entered a little public-house at the extremity of a village, +and, seating myself in a corner of the kitchen, asked for some bread and +cheese. While I was sitting at my repast, three or four labourers came +in for a little refreshment after their work. Ideas respecting the +inequality of rank pervade every order in society; and, as my appearance +was meaner and more contemptible than theirs, I found it expedient to +give way to these gentry of a village alehouse, and remove to an +obscurer station. I was surprised, and not a little startled, to find +them fall almost immediately into conversation about my history, whom, +with a slight variation of circumstances, they styled the notorious +housebreaker, Kit Williams. + +"Damn the fellow," said one of them, "one never hears of any thing else. +O' my life, I think he makes talk for the whole country." + +"That is very true," replied another. "I was at the market-town to-day +to sell some oats for my master, and there was a hue and cry, some of +them thought they had got him, but it was a false alarm." + +"That hundred guineas is a fine thing," rejoined the first. "I should be +glad if so be as how it fell in my way." + +"For the matter of that," said his companion, "I should like a hundred +guineas as well as another. But I cannot be of your mind for all that. I +should never think money would do me any good that had been the means of +bringing a Christian creature to the gallows." + +"Poh, that is all my granny! Some folks must be hanged, to keep the +wheels of our state-folks a-going. Besides, I could forgive the fellow +all his other robberies, but that he should have been so hardened as to +break the house of his own master at last, that is too bad." + +"Lord! lord!" replied the other, "I see you know nothing of the matter! +I will tell you how it was, as I learned it at the town. I question +whether he ever robbed his master at all. But, hark you! you must know +as how that squire Falkland was once tried for murder"-- + +"Yes, yes, we know that." + +"Well, he was as innocent as the child unborn. But I supposes as how he +is a little soft or so. And so Kit Williams--Kit is a devilish cunning +fellow, you may judge that from his breaking prison no less than five +times,--so, I say, he threatened to bring his master to trial at +'size all over again, and so frightened him, and got money from him at +divers times. Till at last one squire Forester, a relation of t'other, +found it all out. And he made the hell of a rumpus, and sent away Kit to +prison in a twinky; and I believe he would have been hanged: for when +two squires lay their heads together, they do not much matter law, you +know; or else they twist the law to their own ends, I cannot exactly say +which; but it is much at one when the poor fellow's breath is out of his +body." + +Though this story was very circumstantially told, and with a sufficient +detail of particulars, it did not pass unquestioned. Each man maintained +the justness of his own statement, and the dispute was long and +obstinately pursued. Historians and commentators at length withdrew +together. The terrors with which I was seized when this conversation +began, were extreme. I stole a sidelong glance to one quarter and +another, to observe if any man's attention was turned upon me. I +trembled as if in an ague-fit; and, at first, felt continual impulses to +quit the house, and take to my heels. I drew closer to my corner, held +aside my head, and seemed from time to time to undergo a total +revolution of the animal economy. + +At length the tide of ideas turned. Perceiving they paid no attention to +me, the recollection of the full security my disguise afforded recurred +strongly to my thoughts; and I began inwardly to exult, though I did not +venture to obtrude myself to examination. By degrees I began to be +amused at the absurdity of their tales, and the variety of the +falsehoods I heard asserted around me. My soul seemed to expand; I felt +a pride in the self-possession and lightness of heart with which I could +listen to the scene; and I determined to prolong and heighten the +enjoyment. Accordingly, when they were withdrawn, I addressed myself to +our hostess, a buxom, bluff, good-humoured widow, and asked what sort of +a man this Kit Williams might be? She replied that, as she was informed, +he was as handsome, likely a lad, as any in four counties round; and +that she loved him for his cleverness, by which he outwitted all the +keepers they could set over him, and made his way through stone walls as +if they were so many cobwebs. I observed, that the country was so +thoroughly alarmed, that I did not think it possible he should escape +the pursuit that was set up after him. This idea excited her immediate +indignation: she said, she hoped he was far enough away by this time; +but if not, she wished the curse of God might light on them that +betrayed so noble a fellow to an ignominious end!--Though she little +thought that the person of whom she spoke was so near her, yet the +sincere and generous warmth with which She interested herself in my +behalf gave me considerable pleasure. With this sensation to sweeten the +fatigues of the day and the calamities of my situation, I retired from +the kitchen to a neighbouring barn, laid myself down upon some straw, +and fell into a profound sleep. + +The next day about noon, as I was pursuing my journey, I was overtaken +by two men on horseback, who stopped me, to enquire respecting a person +that they supposed might have passed along that road. As they proceeded +in their description, I perceived, with astonishment and terror, that I +was myself the person to whom their questions related. They entered into +a tolerably accurate detail of the various characteristics by which my +person might best be distinguished. They said, they had good reason to +believe that I had been seen at a place in that county the very day +before. While they were speaking a third person, who had fallen behind, +came up; and my alarm was greatly increased upon seeing that this person +was the servant of Mr. Forester, who had visited me in prison about a +fortnight before my escape. My best resource in this crisis was +composure and apparent indifference. It was fortunate for me that my +disguise was so complete, that the eye of Mr. Falkland itself could +scarcely have penetrated it. I had been aware for some time before that +this was a refuge which events might make necessary, and had endeavoured +to arrange and methodise my ideas upon the subject. From my youth I had +possessed a considerable facility in the art of imitation; and when I +quitted my retreat in the habitation of Mr. Raymond, I adopted, along +with my beggar's attire, a peculiar slouching and clownish gait, to be +used whenever there should appear the least chance of my being observed, +together with an Irish brogue which I had had an opportunity of studying +in my prison. Such are the miserable expedients, and so great the +studied artifice, which man, who never deserves the name of manhood but +in proportion as he is erect and independent, may find it necessary to +employ, for the purpose of eluding the inexorable animosity and +unfeeling tyranny of his fellow man! I had made use of this brogue, +though I have not thought it necessary to write it down in my narrative, +in the conversation of the village alehouse. Mr. Forester's servant, as +he came up, observed that his companions were engaged in conversation +with me; and, guessing at the subject, asked whether they had gained any +intelligence. He added to the information at which they had already +hinted, that a resolution was taken to spare neither diligence nor +expense for my discovery and apprehension, and that they were satisfied, +if I were above ground and in the kingdom, it would be impossible for me +to escape them. + +Every new incident that had occurred to me tended to impress upon my +mind the extreme danger to which I was exposed. I could almost have +imagined that I was the sole subject of general attention, and that the +whole world was in arms to exterminate me. The very idea tingled through +every fibre of my frame. But, terrible as it appeared to my imagination, +it did but give new energy to my purpose; and I determined that I would +not voluntarily resign the field, that is, literally speaking, my neck +to the cord of the executioner, notwithstanding the greatest superiority +in my assailants. But the incidents which had befallen me, though they +did not change my purpose, induced me to examine over again the means by +which it might be effected. The consequence of this revisal was, to +determine me to bend my course to the nearest sea-port on the west side +of the island, and transport myself to Ireland. I cannot now tell what +it was that inclined me to prefer this scheme to that which I had +originally formed. Perhaps the latter, which had been for some time +present to my imagination, for that reason appeared the more obvious of +the two; and I found an appearance of complexity, which the mind did not +stay to explain, in substituting the other in its stead. + +I arrived without further impediment at the place from which I intended +to sail, enquired for a vessel, which I found ready to put to sea in a +few hours, and agreed with the captain for my passage. Ireland had to +me the disadvantage of being a dependency of the British government, and +therefore a place of less security than most other countries which are +divided from it by the ocean. To judge from the diligence with which I +seemed to be pursued in England, it was not improbable that the zeal of +my persecutors might follow me to the other side of the channel. It was +however sufficiently agreeable to my mind, that I was upon the point of +being removed one step further from the danger which was so grievous to +my imagination. + +Could there be any peril in the short interval that was to elapse, +before the vessel was to weigh anchor and quit the English shore? +Probably not. A very short time had intervened between my determination +for the sea and my arrival at this place; and if any new alarm had been +given to my prosecutors, it proceeded from the old woman a very few days +before. I hoped I had anticipated their diligence. Meanwhile, that I +might neglect no reasonable precaution, I went instantly on board, +resolved that I would not unnecessarily, by walking the streets of the +town, expose myself to any untoward accident. This was the first time I +had, upon any occasion, taken leave of my native country. + + + + +CHAPTER VI. + + +The time was now nearly elapsed that was prescribed for our stay, and +orders for weighing anchor were every moment expected, when we were +hailed by a boat from the shore, with two other men in it besides those +that rowed. They entered our vessel in an instant. They were officers +of justice. The passengers, five persons besides myself, were ordered +upon deck for examination. I was inexpressibly disturbed at the +occurrence of such a circumstance in so unseasonable a moment. I took it +for granted that it was of me they were in search. Was it possible that, +by any unaccountable accident, they should have got an intimation of my +disguise? It was infinitely more distressing to encounter them upon this +narrow stage, and under these pointed circumstances, than, as I had +before encountered my pursuers, under the appearance of an indifferent +person. My recollection however did not forsake me. I confided in my +conscious disguise and my Irish brogue, as a rock of dependence against +all accidents. + +No sooner did we appear upon deck than, to my great consternation, I +could observe the attention of our guests principally turned upon me. +They asked a few frivolous questions of such of my fellow passengers as +happened to be nearest to them; and then, turning to me, enquired my +name, who I was, whence I came, and what had brought me there? I had +scarcely opened my mouth to reply, when, with one consent, they laid +hold of me, said I was their prisoner, and declared that my accent, +together with the correspondence of my person, would be sufficient to +convict me before any court in England. I was hurried out of the vessel +into the boat in which they came, and seated between them, as if by way +of precaution, lest I should spring overboard, and by any means escape +them. + +I now took it for granted that I was once more in the power of Mr. +Falkland; and the idea was insupportably mortifying and oppressive to my +imagination. Escape from his pursuit, freedom from his tyranny, were +objects upon which my whole soul was bent. Could no human ingenuity and +exertion effect them? Did his power reach through all space, and his +eye penetrate every concealment? Was he like that mysterious being, to +protect us from whose fierce revenge mountains and hills, we are told, +might fall on us in vain? No idea is more heart-sickening and tremendous +than this. But, in my case, it was not a subject of reasoning or of +faith; I could derive no comfort, either directly from the unbelief +which, upon religious subjects, some men avow to their own minds; or +secretly from the remoteness and incomprehensibility of the conception: +it was an affair of sense; I felt the fangs of the tiger striking deep +into my heart. + +But though this impression was at first exceedingly strong, and +accompanied with its usual attendants of dejection and pusillanimity, my +mind soon began, as it were mechanically, to turn upon the consideration +of the distance between this sea-port and my county prison, and the +various opportunities of escape that might offer themselves in the +interval. My first duty was to avoid betraying myself, more than it +might afterwards appear I was betrayed already. It was possible that, +though apprehended, my apprehension might have been determined on upon +some slight score, and that, by my dexterity, I might render my +dismission as sudden as my arrest had been. It was even possible that I +had been seized through a mistake, and that the present measure might +have no connection with Mr. Falkland's affair. Upon every supposition, +it was my business to gain information. In my passage from the ship to +the town I did not utter a word. My conductors commented on my +sulkiness; but remarked that it would avail me nothing--I should +infallibly swing, as it was never known that any body got off who was +tried for robbing his majesty's mail. It is difficult to conceive the +lightness of heart which was communicated to me by these words: I +persisted however in the silence I had meditated. From the rest of their +conversation, which was sufficiently voluble, I learned that the mail +from Edinburgh to London had been robbed about ten days before by two +Irishmen, that one of them was already secured, and that I was taken up +upon suspicion of being the other. They had a description of his person, +which, though, as I afterwards found, it disagreed from mine in several +material articles, appeared to them to tally to the minutest tittle. The +intelligence that the whole proceeding against me was founded in a +mistake, took an oppressive load from my mind. I believed that I should +immediately be able to establish my innocence, to the satisfaction of +any magistrate in the kingdom; and though crossed in my plans, and +thwarted in my design of quitting the island, even after I was already +at sea, this was but a trifling inconvenience compared with what I had +had but too much reason to fear. + +As soon as we came ashore, I was conducted to the house of a justice of +peace, a man who had formerly been the captain of a collier, but who, +having been successful in the world, had quitted this wandering life, +and for some years had had the honour to represent his majesty's person. +We were detained for some time in a sort of anti-room, waiting his +reverence's leisure. The persons by whom I had been taken up were +experienced in their trade, and insisted upon employing this interval in +searching me, in presence of two of his worship's servants. They found +upon me fifteen guineas and some silver. They required me to strip +myself perfectly naked, that they might examine whether I had bank-notes +concealed any where about my person. They took up the detached parcels +of my miserable attire as I threw it from me, and felt them one by one, +to discover whether the articles of which they were in search might by +any device be sewn up in them. To all this I submitted without +murmuring. It might probably come to the same thing at last; and summary +justice was sufficiently coincident with my views, my principal object +being to get as soon as possible out of the clutches of the respectable +persons who now had me in custody. + +This operation was scarcely completed, before we were directed to be +ushered into his worship's apartment. My accusers opened the charge, and +told him they had been ordered to this town, upon an intimation that one +of the persons who robbed the Edinburgh mail was to be found here; and +that they had taken me on board a vessel which was by this time under +sail for Ireland. "Well," says his worship, "that is your story; now let +us hear what account the gentleman gives of himself. What is your +name--ha, sirrah? and from what part of Tipperary are you pleased to +come?" I had already taken my determination upon this article; and the +moment I learned the particulars of the charge against me, resolved, for +the present at least, to lay aside my Irish accent, and speak my native +tongue. This I had done in the very few words I had spoken to my +conductors in the anti-room: they started at the metamorphosis; but they +had gone too far for it to be possible they should retract, in +consistence with their honour. I now told the justice that I was no +Irishman, nor had ever been in that country: I was a native of England. +This occasioned a consulting of the deposition in which my person was +supposed to be described, and which my conductors had brought with them +for their direction. To be sure, that required that the offender should +be an Irishman. + +Observing his worship hesitate, I thought this was the time to push the +matter a little further. I referred to the paper, and showed that the +description neither tallied as to height nor complexion. But then it did +as to years and the colour of the hair; and it was not this gentleman's +habit, as he informed me, to squabble about trifles, or to let a man's +neck out of the halter for a pretended flaw of a few inches in his +stature. "If a man were too short," he said, "there was no remedy like a +little stretching." The miscalculation in my case happened to be the +opposite way, but his reverence did not think proper to lose his jest. +Upon the whole, he was somewhat at a loss how to proceed. + +My conductors observed this, and began to tremble for the reward, which, +two hours ago, they thought as good as in their own pocket. To retain me +in custody they judged to be a safe speculation; if it turned out a +mistake at last, they felt little apprehension of a suit for false +imprisonment from a poor man, accoutred as I was, in rags. They +therefore urged his worship to comply with their views. They told him +that to be sure the evidence against me did not prove so strong as for +their part they heartily wished it had, but that there were a number of +suspicious circumstances respecting me. When I was brought up to them +upon the deck of the vessel, I spoke as fine an Irish brogue as one +shall hear in a summer's day; and now, all at once, there was not the +least particle of it left. In searching me they had found upon me +fifteen guineas, how should a poor beggar lad, such as I appeared, come +honestly by fifteen guineas? Besides, when they had stripped me naked, +though my dress was so shabby my skin had all the sleekness of a +gentleman. In fine, for what purpose could a poor beggar, who had never +been in Ireland in his life, want to transport himself to that country? +It was as clear as the sun that I was no better than I should be. This +reasoning, together with some significant winks and gestures between the +justice and the plaintiffs, brought him over to their way of thinking. +He said, I must go to Warwick, where it seems the other robber was at +present in custody, and be confronted with him; and if then every thing +appeared fair and satisfactory, I should be discharged. + +No intelligence could be more terrible than that which was contained in +these words. That I, who had found the whole country in arms against me, +who was exposed to a pursuit so peculiarly vigilant and penetrating, +should now be dragged to the very centre of the kingdom, without power +of accommodating myself to circumstances, and under the immediate +custody of the officers of justice, seemed to my ears almost the same +thing as if he had pronounced upon me a sentence of death! I strenuously +urged the injustice of this proceeding. I observed to the magistrate, +that it was impossible I should be the person at whom the description +pointed. It required an Irishman; I was no Irishman. It described a +person shorter than I; a circumstance of all others the least capable of +being counterfeited. There was not the slightest reason for detaining me +in custody. I had been already disappointed of my voyage, and lost the +money I had paid, down, through the officiousness of these gentlemen in +apprehending me. I assured his worship, that every delay, under my +circumstances, was of the utmost importance to me. It was impossible to +devise a greater injury to be inflicted on me, than the proposal that, +instead of being permitted to proceed upon my voyage, I should be sent, +under arrest, into the heart of the kingdom. + +My remonstrances were vain. The justice was by no means inclined to +digest the being expostulated with in this manner by a person in the +habiliments of a beggar. In the midst of my address he would have +silenced me for my impertinence, but that I spoke with an earnestness +with which he was wholly unable to contend. When I had finished, he told +me it was all to no purpose, and that it might have been better for me, +if I had shown myself less insolent. It was clear that I was a vagabond +and a suspicious person. The more earnest I showed myself to get off, +the more reason there was he should keep me fast. Perhaps, after all, I +should turn out to be the felon in question. But, if I was not that, he +had no doubt I was worse; a poacher, or, for what he knew, a murderer. +He had a kind of a notion that he had seen my face before about some +such affair; out of all doubt I was an old offender. He had it in his +choice to send me to hard labour as a vagrant, upon the strength of my +appearance and the contradictions in my story, or to order me to +Warwick; and, out of the spontaneous goodness of his disposition, he +chose the milder side of the alternative. He could assure me I should +not slip through his fingers. It was of more benefit to his majesty's +government to hang one such fellow as he suspected me to be, than, out +of mistaken tenderness, to concern one's self for the good of all the +beggars in the nation. + +Finding it was impossible to work, in the way I desired, on a man so +fully impressed with his own dignity and importance and my utter +insignificance, I claimed that, at least, the money taken from my person +should be restored to me. This was granted. His worship perhaps +suspected that he had stretched a point in what he had already done, +and was therefore the less unwilling to relax in this incidental +circumstance. My conductors did not oppose themselves to this +indulgence, for a reason that will appear in the sequel. The justice +however enlarged upon his clemency in this proceeding. He did not know +whether he was not exceeding the spirit of his commission in complying +with my demand. So much money in my possession could not be honestly +come by. But it was his temper to soften, as far as could be done with +propriety, the strict letter of the law. + +There were cogent reasons why the gentlemen who had originally taken me +into custody, chose that I should continue in their custody when my +examination was over. Every man is, in his different mode, susceptible +to a sense of honour; and they did not choose to encounter the disgrace +that would accrue to them, if justice had been done. Every man is in +some degree influenced by the love of power; and they were willing I +should owe any benefit I received, to their sovereign grace and +benignity, and not to the mere reason of the case. It was not however an +unsubstantial honour and barren power that formed the objects of their +pursuit: no, their views were deeper than that. In a word, though they +chose that I should retire from the seat of justice, as I had come +before it, a prisoner, yet the tenor of my examination had obliged them, +in spite of themselves, to suspect that I was innocent of the charge +alleged against me. Apprehensive therefore that the hundred guineas +which had been offered as a reward for taking the robber was completely +out of the question in the present business, they were contented to +strike at smaller game. Having conducted me to an inn, and given +directions respecting a vehicle for the journey, they took me aside, +while one of them addressed me in the following manner:-- + +"You see, my lad, how the case stands: hey for Warwick is the word I and +when we are got there, what may happen then I will not pretend for to +say. Whether you are innocent or no is no business of mine; but you are +not such a chicken as to suppose, if so be as you are innocent, that +that will make your game altogether sure. You say your business calls +you another way, and as how you are in haste: I scorns to cross any man +in his concerns, if I can help it. If therefore you will give us them +there fifteen shiners, why snug is the word. They are of no use to you; +a beggar, you know, is always at home. For the matter of that, we could +have had them in the way of business, as you saw, at the justice's. But +I am a man of principle; I loves to do things above board, and scorns to +extort a shilling from any man." + +He who is tinctured with principles of moral discrimination is apt upon +occasion to be run away with by his feelings in that respect, and to +forget the immediate interest of the moment. I confess, that the first +sentiment excited in my mind by this overture was that of indignation. I +was irresistibly impelled to give utterance to this feeling, and +postpone for a moment the consideration of the future. I replied with +the severity which so base a proceeding appeared to deserve. My +bear-leaders were considerably surprised with my firmness, but seemed to +think it beneath them to contest with me the principles I delivered. He +who had made the overture contented himself with replying, "Well, well, +my lad, do as you will; you are not the first man that has been hanged +rather than part with a few guineas." His words did not pass unheeded by +me. They were strikingly applicable to my situation, and I was +determined not to suffer the occasion to escape me unimproved. + +The pride of these gentlemen however was too great to admit of further +parley for the present. They left me abruptly; having first ordered an +old man, the father of the landlady, to stay in the room with me while +they were absent. The old man they ordered, for security, to lock the +door, and put the key in his pocket; at the same time mentioning below +stairs the station in which they had left me, that the people of the +house might have an eye upon what went forward, and not suffer me to +escape. What was the intention of this manoeuvre I am unable certainly +to pronounce. Probably it was a sort of compromise between their pride +and their avarice; being desirous, for some reason or other, to drop me +as soon as convenient, and therefore determining to wait the result of +my private meditations on the proposal they had made. + + + + +CHAPTER VII. + + +They were no sooner withdrawn than I cast my eye upon the old man, and +found something extremely venerable and interesting in his appearance. +His form was above the middle size. It indicated that his strength had +been once considerable; nor was it at this time by any means +annihilated. His hair was in considerable quantity, and was as white as +the drifted snow. His complexion was healthful and ruddy, at the same +time that his face was furrowed with wrinkles. In his eye there was +remarkable vivacity, and his whole countenance was strongly expressive +of good-nature. The boorishness of his rank in society was lost in the +cultivation his mind had derived from habits of sensibility and +benevolence. + +The view of his figure immediately introduced a train of ideas into my +mind, respecting the advantage to be drawn from the presence of such a +person. The attempt to take any step without his consent was hopeless; +for, though I should succeed with regard to him, he could easily give +the alarm to other persons, who would, no doubt, be within call. Add to +which, I could scarcely have prevailed on myself to offer any offence to +a person whose first appearance so strongly engaged my affection and +esteem. In reality my thoughts were turned into a different channel. I +was impressed with an ardent wish to be able to call this man my +benefactor. Pursued by a train of ill fortune, I could no longer +consider myself as a member of society. I was a solitary being, cut off +from the expectation of sympathy, kindness, and the good-will of +mankind. I was strongly impelled, by the situation in which the present +moment placed me, to indulge in a luxury which my destiny seemed to have +denied. I could not conceive the smallest comparison between the idea of +deriving my liberty from the spontaneous kindness of a worthy and +excellent mind, and that of being indebted for it to the selfishness and +baseness of the worst members of society. It was thus that I allowed +myself in the wantonness of refinement, even in the midst of +destruction. + +Guided by these sentiments, I requested his attention to the +circumstances by which I had been brought into my present situation. He +immediately signified his assent, and said he would cheerfully listen to +any thing I thought proper to communicate. I told him, the persons who +had just left me in charge with him had come to this town for the +purpose of apprehending some person who had been guilty of robbing the +mail; that they had chosen to take me up under this warrant, and had +conducted me before a justice of the peace; that they had soon detected +their mistake, the person in question being an Irishman, and differing +from me both in country and stature; but that, by collusion between them +and the justice, they were permitted to retain me in custody, and +pretended to undertake to conduct me to Warwick to confront me with my +accomplice; that, in searching me at the justice's, they had found a sum +of money in my possession which excited their cupidity, and that they +had just been proposing to me to give me my liberty upon condition of my +surrendering this sum into their hands. Under these circumstances, I +requested him to consider, whether he would wish to render himself the +instrument of their extortion. I put myself into his hands, and solemnly +averred the truth of the facts I had just stated. If he would assist me +in my escape, it could have no other effect than to disappoint the base +passions of my conductors. I would upon no account expose him to any +real inconvenience; but I was well assured that the same generosity that +should prompt him to a good deed, would enable him effectually to +vindicate it when done; and that those who detained me, when they had +lost sight of their prey, would feel covered with confusion, and not +dare to take another step in the affair. + +The old man listened to what I related with curiosity and interest. He +said that he had always felt an abhorrence to the sort of people who had +me in their hands; that he had an aversion to the task they had just +imposed upon him, but that he could not refuse some little disagreeable +offices to oblige his daughter and son-in-law. He had no doubt, from my +countenance and manner, of the truth of what I had asserted to him. It +was an extraordinary request I had made, and he did not know what had +induced me to think him the sort of person to whom, with any prospect of +success, it might be made. In reality however his habits of thinking +were uncommon, and he felt more than half inclined to act as I desired. +One thing at least he would ask of me in return, which was to be +faithfully informed in some degree respecting the person he was desired +to oblige. What was my name? + +The question came upon me unprepared. But, whatever might be the +consequence, I could not bear to deceive the person by whom it was put, +and in the circumstances under which it was put. The practice of +perpetual falsehood is too painful a task. I replied, that my name was +Williams. + +He paused. His eye was fixed upon me. I saw his complexion alter at the +repetition of that word. He proceeded with visible anxiety. + +My Christian name? + +Caleb. + +Good God! it could not be ----? He conjured me by every thing that was +sacred to answer him faithfully to one question more. I was not--no, it +was impossible--the person who had formerly lived servant with Mr. +Falkland, of ----? + +I told him that, whatever might be the meaning of his question, I would +answer him truly. I was the individual he mentioned. + +As I uttered these words the old man rose from his seat. He was sorry +that fortune had been so unpropitious to him, as for him ever to have +set eyes upon me! I was a monster with whom the very earth groaned! + +I entreated that he would suffer me to explain this new +misapprehension, as he had done in the former instance. I had no doubt +that I should do it equally to his satisfaction. + +No! no! no! he would upon no consideration admit, that his ears should +suffer such contamination. This case and the other were very different. +There was no criminal upon the face of the earth, no murderer, half so +detestable as the person who could prevail upon himself to utter the +charges I had done, by way of recrimination, against so generous a +master.--The old man was in a perfect agony with the recollection. + +At length he calmed himself enough to say, he should never cease to +grieve that he had held a moment's parley with me. He did not know what +was the conduct severe justice required of him; but, since he had come +into the knowledge of who I was only by my own confession, it was +irreconcilably repugnant to his feelings to make use of that knowledge +to my injury. Here therefore all relation between us ceased; as indeed +it would be an abuse of words to consider me in the light of a human +creature. He would do me no mischief; but, on the other hand, he would +not, for the world, be in any way assisting and abetting me. + +I was inexpressibly affected at the abhorrence this good and benevolent +creature expressed against me. I could not be silent; I endeavoured once +and again to prevail upon him to hear me. But his determination was +unalterable. Our contest lasted for some time, and he at length +terminated it by ringing the bell, and calling up the waiter. A very +little while after, my conductors entered, and the other persons +withdrew. + +It was a part of the singularity of my fate that it hurried me from one +species of anxiety and distress to another, too rapidly to suffer any +one of them to sink deeply into my mind. I am apt to believe, in the +retrospect, that half the calamities I was destined to endure would +infallibly have overwhelmed and destroyed me. But, as it was, I had no +leisure to chew the cud upon misfortunes as they befel me, but was under +the necessity of forgetting them, to guard against peril that the next +moment seemed ready to crush me. + +The behaviour of this incomparable and amiable old man cut me to the +heart. It was a dreadful prognostic for all my future life. But, as I +have just observed, my conductors entered, and another subject called +imperiously upon my attention. I could have been content, mortified as I +was at this instant, to have been shut up in some impenetrable solitude, +and to have wrapped myself in inconsolable misery. But the grief I +endured had not such power over me as that I could be content to risk +the being led to the gallows. The love of life, and still more a hatred +against oppression, steeled my heart against that species of inertness. +In the scene that had just passed I had indulged, as I have said, in a +wantonness and luxury of refinement. It was time that indulgence should +be brought to a period. It was dangerous to trifle any more upon the +brink of fate; and, penetrated as I was with sadness by the result of my +last attempt, I was little disposed to unnecessary circumambulation. + +I was exactly in the temper in which the gentlemen who had me in their +power would have desired to find me. Accordingly we entered immediately +upon business; and, after some chaffering, they agreed to accept eleven +guineas as the price of my freedom. To preserve however the chariness of +their reputation, they insisted upon conducting me with them for a few +miles on the outside of a stage-coach. They then pretended that the road +they had to travel lay in a cross country direction; and, having +quitted the vehicle, they suffered me, almost as soon as it was out of +sight, to shake off this troublesome association, and follow my own +inclinations. It may be worth remarking by the way, that these fellows +outwitted themselves at their own trade. They had laid hold of me at +first under the idea of a prize of a hundred guineas; they had since +been glad to accept a composition of eleven: but if they had retained me +a little longer in their possession, they would have found the +possibility of acquiring the sum that had originally excited their +pursuit, upon a different score. + +The mischances that had befallen me, in my late attempt to escape from +my pursuers by sea, deterred me from the thought of repeating that +experiment. I therefore once more returned to the suggestion of hiding +myself, at least for the present, amongst the crowds of the metropolis. +Meanwhile, I by no means thought proper to venture by the direct route, +and the less so, as that was the course which would be steered by my +late conductors; but took my road along the borders of Wales. The only +incident worth relating in this place occurred in an attempt to cross +the Severn in a particular point. The mode was by a ferry; but, by some +strange inadvertence, I lost my way so completely as to be wholly unable +that night to reach the ferry, and arrive at the town which I had +destined for my repose. + +This may seem a petty disappointment, in the midst of the overwhelming +considerations that might have been expected to engross every thought of +my mind. Yet it was borne by me with singular impatience. I was that day +uncommonly fatigued. Previously to the time that I mistook, or at least +was aware of the mistake of the road, the sky had become black and +lowring, and soon after the clouds burst down in sheets of rain. I was +in the midst of a heath, without a tree or covering of any sort to +shelter me. I was thoroughly drenched in a moment. I pushed on with a +sort of sullen determination. By and by the rain gave place to a storm +of hail. The hail-stones were large and frequent. I was ill defended by +the miserable covering I wore, and they seemed to cut me in a thousand +directions. The hail-storm subsided, and was again succeeded by a heavy +rain. By this time it was that I had perceived I was wholly out of my +road. I could discover neither man nor beast, nor habitation of any +kind. I walked on, measuring at every turn the path it would be proper +to pursue, but in no instance finding a sufficient reason to reject one +or prefer another. My mind was bursting with depression and anguish. I +muttered imprecations and murmuring as I passed along. I was full of +loathing and abhorrence of life, and all that life carries in its train. +After wandering without any certain direction for two hours, I was +overtaken by the night. The scene was nearly pathless, and it was vain +to think of proceeding any farther. + +Here I was, without comfort, without shelter, and without food. There +was not a particle of my covering that was not as wet as if it had been +fished from the bottom of the ocean. My teeth chattered. I trembled in +every limb. My heart burned with universal fury. At one moment I +stumbled and fell over some unseen obstacle; at another I was turned +back by an impediment I could not overcome. + +There was no strict connection between these casual inconveniences and +the persecution under which I laboured. But my distempered thoughts +confounded them together. I cursed the whole system of human existence. +I said, "Here I am, an outcast, destined to perish with hunger and cold. +All men desert me. All men hate me. I am driven with mortal threats +from the sources of comfort and existence. Accursed world! that hates +without a cause, that overwhelms innocence with calamities which ought +to be spared even to guilt! Accursed world! dead to every manly +sympathy; with eyes of horn, and hearts of steel! Why do I consent to +live any longer? Why do I seek to drag on an existence, which, if +protracted, must be protracted amidst the lairs of these human tigers?" + +This paroxysm at length exhausted itself. Presently after, I discovered +a solitary shed, which I was contented to resort to for shelter. In a +corner of the shed I found some clean straw. I threw off my rags, placed +them in a situation where they would best be dried, and buried myself +amidst this friendly warmth. Here I forgot by degrees the anguish that +had racked me. A wholesome shed and fresh straw may seem but scanty +benefits; but they offered themselves when least expected, and my whole +heart was lightened by the encounter. Through fatigue of mind and body, +it happened in this instance, though in general my repose was remarkably +short, that I slept till almost noon of the next day. When I rose, I +found that I was at no great distance from the ferry, which I crossed, +and entered the town where I intended to have rested the preceding +night. + +It was market-day. As I passed near the cross, I observed two people +look at me with great earnestness: after which one of them exclaimed, "I +will be damned if I do not think that this is the very fellow those men +were enquiring for who set off an hour ago by the coach for ----." I was +extremely alarmed at this information; and, quickening my pace, turned +sharp down a narrow lane. The moment I was out of sight I ran with all +the speed I could exert, and did not think myself safe till I was +several miles distant from the place where this information had reached +my ears. I have always believed that the men to whom it related were the +very persons who had apprehended me on board the ship in which I had +embarked for Ireland; that, by some accident, they had met with the +description of my person as published on the part of Mr. Falkland; and +that, from putting together the circumstances, they had been led to +believe that this was the very individual who had lately been in their +custody. Indeed it was a piece of infatuation in me, for which I am now +unable to account, that, after the various indications which had +occurred in that affair, proving to them that I was a man in critical +and peculiar circumstances, I should have persisted in wearing the same +disguise without the smallest alteration. My escape in the present case +was eminently fortunate. If I had not lost my way in consequence of the +hail-storm on the preceding night, or if I had not so greatly overslept +myself this very morning, I must almost infallibly have fallen into the +hands of these infernal blood-hunters. + +The town they had chosen for their next stage, the name of which I had +thus caught in the market-place, was the town to which, but for this +intimation, I should have immediately proceeded. As it was, I determined +to take a road as wide of it as possible. In the first place to which I +came, in which it was practicable to do so, I bought a great coat, which +I drew over my beggar's weeds, and a better hat. The hat I slouched over +my face, and covered one of my eyes with a green-silk shade. The +handkerchief, which I had hitherto worn about my head, I now tied about +the lower part of my visage, so as to cover my mouth. By degrees I +discarded every part of my former dress, and wore for my upper garment +a kind of carman's frock, which, being of the better sort, made me look +like the son of a reputable farmer of the lower class. Thus equipped, I +proceeded on my journey, and, after a thousand alarms, precautions, and +circuitous deviations from the direct path, arrived safely in London. + + + + +CHAPTER VIII. + + +Here then was the termination of an immense series of labours, upon +which no man could have looked back without astonishment, or forward +without a sentiment bordering on despair. It was at a price which defies +estimation that I had purchased this resting-place; whether we consider +the efforts it had cost me to escape from the walls of my prison, or the +dangers and anxieties to which I had been a prey, from that hour to the +present. + +But why do I call the point at which I was now arrived at a +resting-place? Alas, it was diametrically the reverse! It was my first +and immediate business to review all the projects of disguise I had +hitherto conceived, to derive every improvement I could invent from the +practice to which I had been subjected, and to manufacture a veil of +concealment more impenetrable than ever. This was an effort to which I +could see no end. In ordinary cases the hue and cry after a supposed +offender is a matter of temporary operation; but ordinary cases formed +no standard for the colossal intelligence of Mr. Falkland. For the same +reason, London, which appears an inexhaustible reservoir of concealment +to the majority of mankind, brought no such consolatory sentiment to my +mind. Whether life were worth accepting on such terms I cannot +pronounce. I only know that I persisted in this exertion of my +faculties, through a sort of parental love that men are accustomed to +entertain for their intellectual offspring; the more thought I had +expended in rearing it to its present perfection, the less did I find +myself disposed to abandon it. Another motive, not less strenuously +exciting me to perseverance, was the ever-growing repugnance I felt to +injustice and arbitrary power. + +The first evening of my arrival in town I slept at an obscure inn in the +borough of Southwark, choosing that side of the metropolis, on account +of its lying entirely wide of the part of England from which I came. I +entered the inn in the evening in my countryman's frock; and, having +paid for my lodging before I went to bed, equipped myself next morning +as differently as my wardrobe would allow, and left the house before +day. The frock I made up into a small packet, and, having carried it to +a distance as great as I thought necessary, I dropped it in the corner +of an alley through which I passed. My next care was to furnish myself +with another suit of apparel, totally different from any to which I had +hitherto had recourse. The exterior which I was now induced to assume +was that of a Jew. One of the gang of thieves upon ---- forest, had been +of that race; and by the talent of mimicry, which I have already stated +myself to possess, I could copy their pronunciation of the English +language, sufficiently to answer such occasions as were likely to +present themselves. One of the preliminaries I adopted, was to repair to +a quarter of the town in which great numbers of this people reside, and +study their complexion and countenance. Having made such provision as my +prudence suggested to me, I retired for that night to an inn in the +midway between Mile-end and Wapping. Here I accoutred myself in ray new +habiliments; and, having employed the same precautions as before, +retired from my lodging at a time least exposed to observation. It is +unnecessary to describe the particulars of my new equipage; suffice it +to say, that one of my cares was to discolour my complexion, and give it +the dun and sallow hue which is in most instances characteristic of the +tribe to which I assumed to belong; and that when my metamorphosis was +finished, I could not, upon the strictest examination, conceive that any +one could have traced out the person of Caleb Williams in this new +disguise. + +Thus far advanced in the execution of my project. I deemed it advisable +to procure a lodging, and change my late wandering life for a stationary +one. In this lodging I constantly secluded myself from the rising to the +setting of the sun; the periods I allowed for exercise and air were few, +and those few by night. I was even cautious of so much as approaching +the window of my apartment, though upon the attic story; a principle I +laid down to myself was, not wantonly and unnecessarily to expose myself +to risk, however slight that risk might appear. + +Here let me pause for a moment, to bring before the reader, in the way +in which it was impressed upon my mind, the nature of my situation. I +was born free: I was born healthy, vigorous, and active, complete in all +the lineaments and members of a human body. I was not born indeed to the +possession of hereditary wealth; but I had a better inheritance, an +enterprising mind, an inquisitive spirit, a liberal ambition. In a word, +I accepted my lot with willingness and content; I did not fear but I +should make my cause good in the lists of existence. I was satisfied to +aim at small things; I was pleased to play at first for a slender stake; +I was more willing to grow than to descend in my individual +significance. + +The free spirit and the firm heart with which I commenced, one +circumstance was sufficient to blast. I was ignorant of the power which +the institutions of society give to one man over others; I had fallen +unwarily into the hands of a person who held it as his fondest wish to +oppress and destroy me. + +I found myself subjected, undeservedly on my part, to all the +disadvantages which mankind, if they reflected upon them, would hesitate +to impose on acknowledged guilt. In every human countenance I feared to +find the countenance of an enemy. I shrunk from the vigilance of every +human eye. I dared not open my heart to the best affections of our +nature. I was shut up, a deserted, solitary wretch, in the midst of my +species. I dared not look for the consolations of friendship; but, +instead of seeking to identify myself with the joys and sorrows of +others, and exchanging the delicious gifts of confidence and sympathy, +was compelled to centre my thoughts and my vigilance in myself. My life +was all a lie. I had a counterfeit character to support. I had +counterfeit manners to assume. My gait, my gestures, my accents, were +all of them to be studied. I was not free to indulge, no not one, honest +sally of the soul. Attended with these disadvantages, I was to procure +myself a subsistence, a subsistence to be acquired with infinite +precautions, and to be consumed without the hope of enjoyment. + +This, even this, I was determined to endure; to put my shoulder to the +burthen, and support it with unshrinking firmness. Let it not however be +supposed that I endured it without repining and abhorrence. My time was +divided between the terrors of an animal that skulks from its pursuers, +the obstinacy of unshrinking firmness, and that elastic revulsion that +from time to time seems to shrivel the very hearts of the miserable. If +at some moments I fiercely defied all the rigours of my fate, at others, +and those of frequent recurrence, I sunk into helpless despondence. I +looked forward without hope through the series of my existence, tears of +anguish rushed from my eyes, my courage became extinct, and I cursed the +conscious life that was reproduced with every returning day. + +"Why," upon such occasions I was accustomed to exclaim, "why am I +overwhelmed with the load of existence? Why are all these engines at +work to torment me? I am no murderer; yet, if I were, what worse could I +be fated to suffer? How vile, squalid, and disgraceful is the state to +which I am condemned! This is not my place in the roll of existence, the +place for which either my temper or my understanding has prepared me! To +what purpose serve the restless aspirations of my soul, but to make me, +like a frighted bird, beat myself in vain against the enclosure of my +cage? Nature, barbarous nature! to me thou hast proved indeed the worst +of step-mothers; endowed me with wishes insatiate, and sunk me in +never-ending degradation!" + +I might have thought myself more secure if I had been in possession of +money upon which to subsist. The necessity of earning for myself the +means of existence, evidently tended to thwart the plan of secrecy to +which I was condemned. Whatever labour I adopted, or deemed myself +qualified to discharge, it was first to be considered how I was to be +provided with employment, and where I was to find an employer or +purchaser for my commodities. In the mean time I had no alternative. +The little money with which I had escaped from the blood-hunters was +almost expended. + +After the minutest consideration I was able to bestow upon this +question. I determined that literature should be the field of my first +experiment. I had read of money being acquired in this way, and of +prices given by the speculators in this sort of ware to its proper +manufacturers. My qualifications I esteemed at a slender valuation. I +was not without a conviction that experience and practice must pave the +way to excellent production. But, though of these I was utterly +destitute, my propensities had always led me in this direction; and my +early thirst of knowledge had conducted me to a more intimate +acquaintance with books, than could perhaps have been expected under my +circumstances. If my literary pretensions were slight, the demand I +intended to make upon them was not great. All I asked was a subsistence; +and I was persuaded few persons could subsist upon slenderer means than +myself. I also considered this as a temporary expedient, and hoped that +accident or time might hereafter place me in a less precarious +situation. The reasons that principally determined my choice were, that +this employment called upon me for the least preparation, and could, as +I thought, be exercised with least observation. + +There was a solitary woman, of middle age, who tenanted a chamber in +this house, upon the same floor with my own. I had no sooner determined +upon the destination of my industry than I cast my eye upon her as the +possible instrument for disposing of my productions. Excluded as I was +from all intercourse with my species in general, I found pleasure in the +occasional exchange of a few words with this inoffensive and +good-humoured creature, who was already of an age to preclude scandal. +She lived upon a very small annuity, allowed her by a distant relation, +a woman of quality, who, possessed of thousands herself, had no other +anxiety with respect to this person than that she should not contaminate +her alliance by the exertion of honest industry. This humble creature +was of a uniformly cheerful and active disposition, unacquainted alike +with the cares of wealth and the pressure of misfortune. Though her +pretensions were small, and her information slender, she was by no means +deficient in penetration. She remarked the faults and follies of mankind +with no contemptible discernment; but her temper was of so mild and +forgiving a cast, as would have induced most persons to believe that she +perceived nothing of the matter. Her heart overflowed with the milk of +kindness. She was sincere and ardent in her attachments, and never did +she omit a service which she perceived herself able to render to a human +being. + +Had it not been for these qualifications of temper, I should probably +have found that my appearance, that of a deserted, solitary lad, of +Jewish extraction, effectually precluded my demands upon her kindness. +But I speedily perceived, from her manner of receiving and returning +civilities of an indifferent sort, that her heart was too noble to have +its effusions checked by any base and unworthy considerations. +Encouraged by these preliminaries, I determined to select her as my +agent. I found her willing and alert in the business I proposed to her. +That I might anticipate occasions of suspicion, I frankly told her that, +for reasons which I wished to be excused from relating, but which, if +related, I was sure would not deprive me of her good opinion, I found it +necessary, for the present, to keep myself private. With this statement +she readily acquiesced, and told me that she had no desire for any +further information than I found it expedient to give. + +My first productions were of the poetical kind. After having finished +two or three, I directed this generous creature to take them to the +office of a newspaper; but they were rejected with contempt by the +Aristarchus of that place, who, having bestowed on them a superficial +glance, told her that such matters were not in his way. I cannot help +mentioning in this place, that the countenance of Mrs. Marney (this was +the name of my ambassadress) was in all cases a perfect indication of +her success, and rendered explanation by words wholly unnecessary. She +interested herself so unreservedly in what she undertook, that she felt +either miscarriage or good fortune much more exquisitely than I did. I +had an unhesitating confidence in my own resources, and, occupied as I +was in meditations more interesting and more painful, I regarded these +matters as altogether trivial. + +I quietly took the pieces back, and laid them upon my table. Upon +revisal, I altered and transcribed one of them, and, joining it with two +others, despatched them together to the editor of a magazine. He desired +they might be left with him till the day after to-morrow. When that day +came he told my friend they should be inserted; but, Mrs. Marney asking +respecting the price, he replied, it was their constant rule to give +nothing for poetical compositions, the letter-box being always full of +writings of that sort; but if the gentleman would try his hand in prose, +a short essay or a tale, he would see what he could do for him. + +With the requisition of my literary dictator I immediately complied. I +attempted a paper in the style of Addison's Spectators, which was +accepted. In a short time I was upon an established footing in this +quarter. I however distrusted my resources in the way of moral +disquisition, and soon turned my thoughts to his other suggestion, a +tale. His demands upon me were now frequent, and, to facilitate my +labours, I bethought myself of the resource of translation. I had +scarcely any convenience with respect to the procuring of books; but, as +my memory was retentive, I frequently translated or modelled my +narrative upon a reading of some years before. By a fatality, for which +I did not exactly know how to account, my thoughts frequently led me to +the histories of celebrated robbers; and I related, from time to time, +incidents and anecdotes of Cartouche, Gusman d'Alfarache, and other +memorable worthies, whose career was terminated upon the gallows or the +scaffold. + +In the mean time a retrospect to my own situation rendered a +perseverance even in this industry difficult to be maintained. I often +threw down my pen in an ecstasy of despair. Sometimes for whole days +together I was incapable of action, and sunk into a sort of partial +stupor, too wretched to be described. Youth and health however enabled +me, from time to time, to get the better of my dejection, and to rouse +myself to something like a gaiety, which, if it had been permanent, +might have made this interval of my story tolerable to my reflections. + + + + +CHAPTER IX. + + +While I was thus endeavouring to occupy and provide for the intermediate +period, till the violence of the pursuit after me might be abated, a +new source of danger opened upon me of which I had no previous +suspicion. + +Gines, the thief who had been expelled from Captain Raymond's gang, had +fluctuated, during the last years of his life, between the two +professions of a violator of the laws and a retainer to their +administration. He had originally devoted himself to the first; and +probably his initiation in the mysteries of thieving qualified him to be +peculiarly expert in the profession of a thief-taker--a profession he +had adopted, not from choice, but necessity. In this employment his +reputation was great, though perhaps not equal to his merits; for it +happens here as in other departments of human society, that, however the +subalterns may furnish wisdom and skill, the principals exclusively +possess the _eclat_. He was exercising this art in a very prosperous +manner, when it happened, by some accident, that one or two of his +achievements previous to his having shaken off the dregs of unlicensed +depredation were in danger of becoming subjects of public attention. +Having had repeated intimations of this, he thought it prudent to +decamp; and it was during this period of his retreat that he entered +into the ---- gang. + +Such was the history of this man antecedently to his being placed in the +situation in which I had first encountered him. At the time of that +encounter he was a veteran of Captain Raymond's gang; for thieves being +a short-lived race, the character of veteran costs the less time in +acquiring. Upon his expulsion from this community he returned once more +to his lawful profession, and by his old comrades was received with +congratulation as a lost sheep. In the vulgar classes of society no +length of time is sufficient to expiate a crime; but among the +honourable fraternity of thief-takers it is a rule never to bring one of +their own brethren to a reckoning when it can with any decency be +avoided. They are probably reluctant to fix an unnecessary stain upon +the ermine of their profession. Another rule observed by those who have +passed through the same gradation as Gines had done, and which was +adopted by Gines himself, is always to reserve such as have been the +accomplices of their depredations to the last, and on no account to +assail them without great necessity or powerful temptation. For this +reason, according to Gines's system of tactics, Captain Raymond and his +confederates were, as he would have termed it, safe from his +retaliation. + +But, though Gines was, in this sense of the term, a man of strict +honour, my case unfortunately did not fall within the laws of honour he +acknowledged. Misfortune had overtaken me, and I was on all sides +without protection or shelter. The persecution to which I was exposed +was founded upon the supposition of my having committed felony to an +immense amount. But in this Gines had had no participation; he was +careless whether the supposition were true or false, and hated me as +much as if my innocence had been established beyond the reach of +suspicion. + +The blood-hunters who had taken me into custody at ----, related, as +usual among their fraternity, a part of their adventure, and told of the +reason which inclined them to suppose, that the individual who had +passed through their custody, was the very Caleb Williams for whose +apprehension a reward had been offered of a hundred guineas. Gines, +whose acuteness was eminent in the way of his profession, by comparing +facts and dates, was induced to suspect in his own mind, that Caleb +Williams was the person he had hustled and wounded upon ---- forest. +Against that person he entertained the bitterest aversion. I had been +the innocent occasion of his being expelled with disgrace from Captain +Raymond's gang; and Gines, as I afterwards understood, was intimately +persuaded that there was no comparison between the liberal and manly +profession of a robber from which I had driven him, and the sordid and +mechanical occupation of a blood-hunter, to which he was obliged to +return. He no sooner received the information I have mentioned than he +vowed revenge. He determined to leave all other objects, and consecrate +every faculty of his mind to the unkennelling me from my hiding-place. +The offered reward, which his vanity made him consider as assuredly his +own, appeared as the complete indemnification of his labour and expense. +Thus I had to encounter the sagacity he possessed in the way of his +profession, whetted and stimulated by a sentiment of vengeance, in a +mind that knew no restraint from conscience or humanity. + +When I drew to myself a picture of my situation soon after having fixed +on my present abode, I foolishly thought, as the unhappy are accustomed +to do, that my calamity would admit of no aggravation. The aggravation +which, unknown to me, at this time occurred was the most fearful that +any imagination could have devised. Nothing could have happened more +critically hostile to my future peace, than my fatal encounter with +Gines upon ---- forest. By this means, as it now appears, I had fastened +upon myself a second enemy, of that singular and dreadful sort that is +determined never to dismiss its animosity as long as life shall endure. +While Falkland was the hungry lion whose roarings astonished and +appalled me, Gines was a noxious insect, scarcely less formidable and +tremendous, that hovered about my goings, and perpetually menaced me +with the poison of his sting. + +The first step pursued by him in execution of his project, was to set +out for the sea-port town where I had formerly been apprehended. From +thence he traced me to the banks of the Severn, and from the banks of +the Severn to London. It is scarcely necessary to observe that this is +always practicable, provided the pursuer have motives strong enough to +excite him to perseverance, unless the precautions of the fugitive be, +in the highest degree, both judicious in the conception, and fortunate +in the execution. Gines indeed, in the course of his pursuit, was often +obliged to double his steps; and, like the harrier, whenever he was at a +fault, return to the place where he had last perceived the scent of the +animal whose death he had decreed. He spared neither pains nor time in +the gratification of the passion, which choice had made his ruling one. + +Upon my arrival in town he for a moment lost all trace of me, London +being a place in which, on account of the magnitude of its dimensions, +it might well be supposed that an individual could remain hidden and +unknown. But no difficulty could discourage this new adversary. He went +from inn to inn (reasonably supposing that there was no private house to +which I could immediately repair), till he found, by the description he +gave, and the recollections he excited, that I had slept for one night +in the borough of Southwark. But he could get no further information. +The people of the inn had no knowledge what had become of me the next +morning. + +This however did but render him more eager in the pursuit. The +describing me was now more difficult, on account of the partial change +of dress I had made the second day of my being in town. But Gines at +length overcame the obstacle from that quarter. + +Having traced me to my second inn, he was here furnished with a more +copious information. I had been a subject of speculation for the leisure +hours of some of the persons belonging to this inn. An old woman, of a +most curious and loquacious disposition, who lived opposite to it, and +who that morning rose early to her washing, had espied me from her +window, by the light of a large lamp which hung over the inn, as I +issued from the gate. She had but a very imperfect view of me, but she +thought there was something Jewish in my appearance. She was accustomed +to hold a conference every morning with the landlady of the inn, some of +the waiters and chambermaids occasionally assisting at it. In the course +of the dialogue of this morning, she asked some questions about the Jew +who had slept there the night before. No Jew had slept there. The +curiosity of the landlady was excited in her turn. By the time of the +morning it could be no other but me. It was very strange! They compared +notes respecting my appearance and dress. No two things could be more +dissimilar. The Jew Christian, upon any dearth of subjects of +intelligence, repeatedly furnished matter for their discourse. + +The information thus afforded to Gines appeared exceedingly material. +But the performance did not for some time keep pace with the promise. He +could not enter every private house into which lodgers were ever +admitted, in the same manner that he had treated the inns. He walked the +streets, and examined with a curious and inquisitive eye the countenance +of every Jew about my stature; but in vain. He repaired to Duke's Place +and the synagogues. It was not here that in reality he could calculate +upon finding me; but he resorted to those means in despair, and as a +last hope. He was more than once upon the point of giving up the +pursuit; but he was recalled to it by an insatiable and restless +appetite for revenge. + +It was during this perturbed and fluctuating state of his mind, that he +chanced to pay a visit to a brother of his, who was the head-workman of +a printing-office. There was little intercourse between these two +persons, their dispositions and habits of life being extremely +dissimilar. The printer was industrious, sober, inclined to methodism, +and of a propensity to accumulation. He was extremely dissatisfied with +the character and pursuits of his brother, and had made some ineffectual +attempts to reclaim him. But, though they by no means agreed in their +habits of thinking, they sometimes saw each other. Gines loved to boast +of as many of his achievements as he dared venture to mention; and his +brother was one more hearer, in addition to the set of his usual +associates. The printer was amused with the blunt sagacity of remark and +novelty of incident that characterised Gines's conversation. He was +secretly pleased, in spite of all his sober and church-going prejudices, +that he was brother to a man of so much ingenuity and fortitude. + +After having listened for some time upon this occasion to the wonderful +stories which Gines, in his rugged way, condescended to tell, the +printer felt an ambition to entertain his brother in his turn. He began +to retail some of my stories of Cartouche and Gusman d'Alfarache. The +attention of Gines was excited. His first emotion was wonder; his second +was envy and aversion. Where did the printer get these stories? This +question was answered. "I will tell you what," said the printer, "we +none of us know what to make of the writer of these articles. He writes +poetry, and morality, and history: I am a printer, and corrector of the +press, and may pretend without vanity to be a tolerably good judge of +these matters: he writes them all to my mind extremely fine; and yet he +is no more than a Jew." [To my honest printer this seemed as strange, as +if they had been written by a Cherokee chieftain at the falls of the +Mississippi.] + +"A Jew! How do you know? Did you ever see him?" + +"No; the matter is always brought to us by a woman. But my master hates +mysteries; he likes to see his authors himself. So he plagues and +plagues the old woman; but he can never get any thing out of her, except +that one day she happened to drop that the young gentleman was a Jew." + +A Jew! a young gentleman! a person who did every thing by proxy, and +made a secret of all his motions! Here was abundant matter for the +speculations and suspicions of Gines. He was confirmed in them, without +adverting to the process of his own mind, by the subject of my +lucubrations,--men who died by the hand of the executioner. He said +little more to his brother, except asking, as if casually, what sort of +an old woman this was? of what age she might be? and whether she often +brought him materials of this kind? and soon after took occasion to +leave him. It was with vast pleasure that Gines had listened to this +unhoped-for information. Having collected from his brother sufficient +hints relative to the person and appearance of Mrs. Marney, and +understanding that he expected to receive something from me the next +day, Gines took his stand in the street early, that he might not risk +miscarriage by negligence. He waited several hours, but not without +success. Mrs. Marney came; he watched her into the house; and after +about twenty minutes delay, saw her return. He dogged her from street +to street; observed her finally enter the door of a private house; and +congratulated himself upon having at length arrived at the consummation +of his labours. + +The house she entered was not her own habitation. By a sort of +miraculous accident she had observed Gines following her in the street. +As she went home she saw a woman who had fallen down in a fainting fit. +Moved by the compassion that was ever alive in her, she approached her, +in order to render her assistance. Presently a crowd collected round +them. Mrs. Marney, having done what she was able, once more proceeded +homewards. Observing the crowd round her, the idea of pickpockets +occurred to her mind; she put her hands to her sides, and at the same +time looked round upon the populace. She had left the circle somewhat +abruptly; and Gines, who had been obliged to come nearer, lest he should +lose her in the confusion, was at that moment standing exactly opposite +to her. His visage was of the most extraordinary kind; habit had written +the characters of malignant cunning and dauntless effrontery in every +line of his face; and Mrs. Marney, who was neither philosopher nor +physiognomist, was nevertheless struck. This good woman, like most +persons of her notable character, had a peculiar way of going home, not +through the open streets, but by narrow lanes and alleys, with intricate +insertions and sudden turnings. In one of these, by some accident, she +once again caught a glance of her pursuer. This circumstance, together +with the singularity of his appearance, awakened her conjectures. Could +he be following her? It was the middle of the day, and she could have no +fears for herself. But could this circumstance have any reference to me? +She recollected the precautions and secrecy I practised, and had no +doubt that I had reasons for what I did. She recollected that she had +always been upon her guard respecting me; but had she been sufficiently +so? She thought that, if she should be the means of any mischief to me, +she should be miserable for ever. She determined therefore, by way of +precaution in case of the worst, to call at a friend's house, and send +me word of what had occurred. Having instructed her friend, she went out +immediately upon a visit to a person in the exactly opposite direction, +and desired her friend to proceed upon the errand to me, five minutes +after she left the house. By this prudence she completely extricated me +from the present danger. + +Meantime the intelligence that was brought me by no means ascertained +the greatness of the peril. For any thing I could discover in it the +circumstance might be perfectly innocent, and the fear solely proceed +from the over-caution and kindness of this benevolent and excellent +woman. Yet, such was the misery of my situation, I had no choice. For +this menace or no menace, I was obliged to desert my habitation at a +minute's warning, taking with me nothing but what I could carry in my +hand; to see my generous benefactress no more; to quit my little +arrangements and provision; and to seek once again, in some forlorn +retreat, new projects, and, if of that I could have any rational hope, a +new friend. I descended into the street with a heavy, not an irresolute +heart. It was broad day. I said, persons are at this moment supposed to +be roaming the street in search of me: I must not trust to the chance of +their pursuing one direction, and I another. I traversed half a dozen +streets, and then dropped into an obscure house of entertainment for +persons of small expense. In this house I took some refreshment, passed +several hours of active but melancholy thinking, and at last procured a +bed. As soon however as it was dark I went out (for this was +indispensable) to purchase the materials of a new disguise. Having +adjusted it as well as I could during the night, I left this asylum, +with the same precautions that I had employed in former instances. + + + + +CHAPTER X. + + +I procured a new lodging. By some bias of the mind, it may be, +gratifying itself with images of peril, I inclined to believe that Mrs. +Marney's alarm had not been without foundation. I was however unable to +conjecture through what means danger had approached me; and had +therefore only the unsatisfactory remedy of redoubling my watch upon all +my actions. Still I had the joint considerations pressing upon me of +security and subsistence. I had some small remains of the produce of my +former industry; but this was but small, for my employer was in arrear +with me, and I did not choose in any method to apply to him for payment. +The anxieties of my mind, in spite of all my struggles, preyed upon my +health. I did not consider myself as in safety for an instant. My +appearance was wasted to a shadow; and I started at every sound that was +unexpected. Sometimes I was half tempted to resign myself into the hands +of the law, and brave its worst; but resentment and indignation at those +times speedily flowed back upon my mind, and re-animated my +perseverance. + +I knew no better resource with respect to subsistence than that I had +employed in the former instance, of seeking some third person to stand +between me and the disposal of my industry. I might find an individual +ready to undertake this office in my behalf; but where should I find the +benevolent soul of Mrs. Marney? The person I fixed upon was a Mr. +Spurrel, a man who took in work from the watchmakers, and had an +apartment upon our second floor. I examined him two or three times with +irresolute glances, as we passed upon the stairs, before I would venture +to accost him. He observed this, and at length kindly invited me into +his apartment. + +Being seated, he condoled with me upon my seeming bad health, and the +solitary mode of my living, and wished to know whether he could be of +any service to me. "From the first moment he saw me, he had conceived an +affection for me." In my present disguise I appeared twisted and +deformed, and in other respects by no means an object of attraction. But +it seemed Mr. Spurrel had lost an only son about six months before, and +I was "the very picture of him." If I had put off my counterfeited +ugliness, I should probably have lost all hold upon his affections. "He +was now an old man," as he observed, "just dropping into the grave, and +his son had been his only consolation. The poor lad was always ailing, +but he had been a nurse to him; and the more tending he required while +he was alive, the more he missed him now he was dead. Now he had not a +friend, nor any body that cared for him, in the whole world. If I +pleased, I should be instead of that son to him, and he would treat me +in all respects with the same attention and kindness." + +I expressed my sense of these benevolent offers, but told him that I +should be sorry to be in any way burthensome to him. "My ideas at +present led me to a private and solitary life, and my chief difficulty +was to reconcile this with some mode of earning necessary subsistence. +If he would condescend to lend me his assistance in smoothing this +difficulty, it would be the greatest benefit he could confer on me." I +added, that "my mind had always had a mechanical and industrious turn, +and that I did not doubt of soon mastering any craft to which I +seriously applied myself. I had not been brought up to any trade; but, +if he would favour me with his instructions, I would work with him as +long as he pleased for a bare subsistence. I knew that I was asking of +him an extraordinary kindness; but I was urged on the one hand by the +most extreme necessity, and encouraged on the other by the +persuasiveness of his friendly professions." + +The old man dropped some tears over my apparent distress, and readily +consented to every thing I proposed. Our agreement was soon made, and I +entered upon my functions accordingly. My new friend was a man of a +singular turn of mind. Love of money, and a charitable officiousness of +demeanour, were his leading characteristics. He lived in the most +penurious manner, and denied himself every indulgence. I entitled myself +almost immediately, as he frankly acknowledged, to some remuneration for +my labours, and accordingly he insisted upon my being paid. He did not +however, as some persons would have done under the circumstance, pay me +the whole amount of my earnings, but professed to subtract from them +twenty per cent, as an equitable consideration for instruction, and +commission-money in procuring me a channel for my industry. Yet he +frequently shed tears over me, was uneasy in every moment of our +indispensable separation, and exhibited perpetual tokens of attachment +and fondness. I found him a man of excellent mechanical contrivance, +and received considerable pleasure from his communications. My own +sources of information were various; and he frequently expressed his +wonder and delight in the contemplation of my powers, as well of +amusement as exertion. + +Thus I appeared to have attained a situation not less eligible than in +my connection with Mrs. Marney. I was however still more unhappy. My +fits of despondence were deeper, and of more frequent recurrence. My +health every day grew worse; and Mr. Spurrel was not without +apprehensions that he should lose me, as he before lost his only son. + +I had not been long however in this new situation, before an incident +occurred which filled me with greater alarm and apprehension than ever. +I was walking out one evening, after a long visitation of languor, for +an hour's exercise and air, when my ears were struck with two or three +casual sounds from the mouth of a hawker who was bawling his wares. I +stood still to inform myself more exactly, when, to my utter +astonishment and confusion, I heard him deliver himself nearly in these +words: "_Here you have the_ MOST WONDERFUL AND SURPRISING HISTORY AND +MIRACULOUS ADVENTURES OF CALEB WILLIAMS: _you are informed how he first +robbed, and then brought false accusations against his master; as also +of his attempting divers times to break out of prison, till at last he +effected his escape in the most wonderful and uncredible manner; as also +of his travelling the kingdom in various disguises, and the robberies he +committed with a most desperate and daring gang of thieves; and of his +coming up to London, where it is supposed he now lies concealed; with a +true and faithful copy of the hue and cry printed and published by one +of his Majesty's most principal secretaries of state, offering a reward +of one hundred guineas for apprehending him. All for the price of one +halfpenny_." + +Petrified as I was at these amazing and dreadful sounds, I had the +temerity to go up to the man and purchase one of his papers. I was +desperately resolved to know the exact state of the fact, and what I had +to depend upon. I carried it with me a little way, till, no longer able +to endure the tumult of my impatience, I contrived to make out the chief +part of its contents, by the help of a lamp, at the upper end of a +narrow passage. I found it contain a greater number of circumstances +than could have been expected in this species of publication, I was +equalled to the most notorious housebreaker in the art of penetrating +through walls and doors, and to the most accomplished swindler in +plausibleness, duplicity, and disguise. The hand-bill which Larkins had +first brought to us upon the forest was printed at length. All my +disguises, previously to the last alarm that had been given me by the +providence of Mrs. Marney, were faithfully enumerated; and the public +were warned to be upon their watch against a person of an uncouth and +extraordinary appearance, and who lived in a recluse and solitary +manner. I also learned from this paper that my former lodgings had been +searched on the very evening of my escape, and that Mrs. Marney had been +sent to Newgate, upon a charge of misprision of felony.--This last +circumstance affected me deeply. In the midst of my own sufferings my +sympathies flowed undiminished. It was a most cruel and intolerable +idea, if I were not only myself to be an object of unrelenting +persecution, but my very touch were to be infectious, and every one that +succoured me was to be involved in the common ruin. My instant feeling +was that of a willingness to undergo the utmost malice of my enemies, +could I by that means have saved this excellent woman from alarm and +peril.--I afterwards learned that Mrs. Marney was delivered from +confinement, by the interposition of her noble relation. + +My sympathy for Mrs. Marney however was at this moment a transient one. +A more imperious and irresistible consideration demanded to be heard. + +With what sensations did I ruminate upon this paper? Every word of it +carried despair to my heart. The actual apprehension that I dreaded +would perhaps have been less horrible. It would have put an end to that +lingering terror to which I was a prey. Disguise was no longer of use. A +numerous class of individuals, through every department, almost every +house of the metropolis, would be induced to look with a suspicious eye +upon every stranger, especially every solitary stranger, that fell under +their observation. The prize of one hundred guineas was held out to +excite their avarice and sharpen their penetration. It was no longer +Bow-street, it was a million of men in arms against me. Neither had I the +refuge, which few men have been so miserable as to want, of one single +individual with whom to repose my alarms, and who might shelter me from +the gaze of indiscriminate curiosity. + +What could exceed the horrors of this situation? My heart knocked +against my ribs, my bosom heaved, I gasped and panted for breath. "There +is no end then," said I, "to my persecutors! My unwearied and +long-continued labours lead to no termination! Termination! No; the +lapse of time, that cures all other things, makes my case more +desperate! Why then," exclaimed I, a new train of thought suddenly +rushing into my mind, "why should I sustain the contest any longer? I +can at least elude my persecutors in death. I can bury myself and the +traces of my existence together in friendly oblivion; and thus bequeath +eternal doubt, and ever new alarm, to those who have no peace but in +pursuing me!" + +In the midst of the horrors with which I was now impressed, this idea +gave me pleasure; and I hastened to the Thames to put it in instant +execution. Such was the paroxysm of my mind that my powers of vision +became partially suspended. I was no longer conscious to the feebleness +of disease, but rushed along with fervent impetuosity. I passed from +street to street without observing what direction I pursued. After +wandering I know not how long, I arrived at London Bridge. I hastened to +the stairs, and saw the river covered with vessels. + +"No human being must see me," said I, "at the instant that I vanish for +ever." This thought required some consideration. A portion of time had +elapsed since my first desperate purpose. My understanding began to +return. The sight of the vessels suggested to me the idea of once more +attempting to leave my native country. + +I enquired, and speedily found that the cheapest passage I could procure +was in a vessel moored near the Tower, and which was to sail in a few +days for Middleburgh in Holland. I would have gone instantly on board, +and have endeavoured to prevail with the captain to let me remain there +till he sailed; but unfortunately I had not money enough in my pocket to +defray my passage. + +It was worse than this. I had not money enough in the world. I however +paid the captain half his demand, and promised to return with the rest. +I knew not in what manner it was to be procured, but I believed that I +should not fail in it. I had some idea of applying to Mr. Spurrel. +Surely he would not refuse me? He appeared to love me with parental +affection, and I thought I might trust myself for a moment in his hands. + +I approached my place of residence with a heavy and foreboding heart. +Mr. Spurrel was not at home; and I was obliged to wait for his return. +Worn out with fatigue, disappointment, and the ill state of my health, I +sunk upon a chair. Speedily however I recollected myself. I had work of +Mr. Spurrel's in my trunk, which had been delivered out to me that very +morning, to five times the amount I wanted. I canvassed for a moment +whether I should make use of this property as if it were my own; but I +rejected the idea with disdain. I had never in the smallest degree +merited the reproaches that were east upon me; and I determined I never +would merit them. I sat gasping, anxious, full of the blackest +forebodings. My terrors appeared, even to my own mind, greater and more +importunate than the circumstances authorised. + +It was extraordinary that Mr. Spurrel should be abroad at this hour; I +had never known it happen before. His bed-time was between nine and ten. +Ten o'clock came, eleven o'clock, but not Mr. Spurrel. At midnight I +heard his knock at the door. Every soul in the house was in bed. Mr. +Spurrel, on account of his regular hours, was unprovided with a key to +open for himself. A gleam, a sickly gleam, of the social spirit came +over my heart. I flew nimbly down stairs, and opened the door. + +I could perceive, by the little taper in my hand, something +extraordinary in his countenance. I had not time to speak, before I saw +two other men follow him. At the first glance I was sufficiently +assured what sort of persons they were. At the second, I perceived that +one of them was no other than Gines himself. I had understood formerly +that he had been of this profession, and I was not surprised to find him +in it again. Though I had for three hours endeavoured, as it were, to +prepare myself for the unavoidable necessity of falling once again into +the hands of the officers of law, the sensation I felt at their entrance +was indescribably agonising. I was besides not a little astonished at +the time and manner of their entrance; and I felt anxious to know +whether Mr. Spurrel could be base enough to have been their introducer. + +I was not long held in perplexity. He no sooner saw his followers within +the door, than he exclaimed, with convulsive eagerness, "There, there, +that is your man! thank God! thank God!" Gines looked eagerly in my +face, with a countenance expressive alternately of hope and doubt, and +answered, "By God, and I do not know whether it be or no! I am afraid we +are in the wrong box!" Then recollecting himself, "We will go into the +house, and examine further however." We all went up stairs into Mr. +Spurrel's room; I set down the candle upon the table. I had hitherto +been silent; but I determined not to desert myself, and was a little +encouraged to exertion by the scepticism of Gines. With a calm and +deliberate manner therefore, in my feigned voice, one of the +characteristics of which was lisping, I asked, "Pray, gentlemen, what +may be your pleasure with me?"--"Why," said Gines, "our errand is with +one Caleb Williams, and a precious rascal he is! I ought to know the +chap well enough; but they say he has as many faces as there are days in +the year. So you please to pull off your face; or, if you cannot do +that, at least you can pull off your clothes, and let us see what your +hump is made of." + +I remonstrated, but in vain. I stood detected in part of my artifice; +and Gines, though still uncertain, was every moment more and more +confirmed in his suspicions. Mr. Spurrel perfectly gloated, with eyes +that seemed ready to devour every thing that passed. As my imposture +gradually appeared more palpable, he repeated his exclamation, "Thank +God! thank God!" At last, tired with this scene of mummery, and +disgusted beyond measure with the base and hypocritical figure I seemed +to exhibit, I exclaimed, "Well, I am Caleb Williams; conduct me wherever +you please! And now, Mr. Spurrel!"--He gave a violent start. The +instant I declared myself his transport had been at the highest, and +was, to any power he was able to exert, absolutely uncontrollable. But +the unexpectedness of my address, and the tone in which I spoke, +electrified him.--"Is it possible," continued I, "that you should +have been the wretch to betray me? What have I done to deserve this +treatment? Is this the kindness you professed? the affection that was +perpetually in your mouth? to be the death of me!" + +"My poor boy! my dear creature!" cried Spurrel, whimpering, and in a +tone of the humblest expostulation, "indeed I could not help it! I would +have helped it, if I could! I hope they will not hurt my darling! I am +sure I shall die if they do!" + +"Miserable driveller!" interrupted I, with a stern voice, "do you betray +me into the remorseless fangs of the law, and then talk of my not being +hurt? I know my sentence, and am prepared to meet it! You have fixed the +halter upon my neck, and at the same price would have done so to your +only son! Go, count your accursed guineas! My life would have been +safer in the hands of one I had never seen than in yours, whose mouth +and whose eyes for ever ran over with crocodile affection!" + +I have always believed that my sickness, and, as he apprehended, +approaching death, contributed its part to the treachery of Mr. Spurrel. +He predicted to his own mind the time when I should no longer be able to +work. He recollected with agony the expense that attended his son's +illness and death. He determined to afford me no assistance of a similar +kind. He feared however the reproach of deserting me. He feared the +tenderness of his nature. He felt, that I was growing upon his +affections, and that in a short time he could not have deserted me. He +was driven by a sort of implicit impulse, for the sake of avoiding one +ungenerous action, to take refuge in another, the basest and most +diabolical. This motive, conjoining with the prospect of the proffered +reward, was an incitement too powerful for him to resist. + + + + +CHAPTER XI. + + +Having given vent to my resentment, I left Mr. Spurrel motionless, and +unable to utter a word. Gines and his companion attended me. It is +unnecessary to repeat all the insolence of this man. He alternately +triumphed in the completion of his revenge, and regretted the loss of +the reward to the shrivelled old curmudgeon we had just quitted, whom +however he swore he would cheat of it by one means or another. He +claimed to himself the ingenuity of having devised the halfpenny legend, +the thought of which was all his own, and was an expedient that was +impossible to fail. There was neither law nor justice, he said, to be +had, if Hunks who had done nothing were permitted to pocket the cash, +and his merit were left undistinguished and pennyless. + +I paid but little attention to his story. It struck upon my sense, and I +was able to recollect it at my nearest leisure, though I thought not of +it at the time. For the present I was busily employed, reflecting on my +new situation, and the conduct to be observed in it. The thought of +suicide had twice, in moments of uncommon despair, suggested itself to +my mind; but it was far from my habitual meditations. At present, and in +all cases where death was immediately threatened me from the injustice +of others, I felt myself disposed to contend to the last. + +My prospects were indeed sufficiently gloomy and discouraging. How much +labour had I exerted, first to extricate myself from prison, and next to +evade the diligence of my pursuers; and the result of all, to be brought +back to the point from which I began! I had gained fame indeed, the +miserable fame to have my story bawled forth by hawkers and +ballad-mongers, to have my praises as an active and enterprising villain +celebrated among footmen and chambermaids; but I was neither an +Erostratus nor an Alexander, to die contented with that species of +eulogium. With respect to all that was solid, what chance could I find +in new exertions of a similar nature? Never was a human creature pursued +by enemies more inventive or envenomed. I could have small hope that +they would ever cease their persecution, or that my future attempts +would be crowned with a more desirable issue. + +They were considerations like these that dictated my resolution. My mind +had been gradually weaning from Mr. Falkland, till its feeling rose to +something like abhorrence. I had long cherished a reverence for him, +which not even animosity and subornation on his part could utterly +destroy. But I now ascribed a character so inhumanly sanguinary to his +mind; I saw something so fiend-like in the thus hunting me round the +world, and determining to be satisfied with nothing less than my blood, +while at the same time he knew my innocence, my indisposition to +mischief, nay, I might add, my virtues; that henceforth I trampled +reverence and the recollection of former esteem under my feet. I lost +all regard to his intellectual greatness, and all pity for the agonies +of his soul. I also would abjure forbearance. I would show myself bitter +and inflexible as he had done. Was it wise in him to drive me into +extremity and madness? Had he no fears for his own secret and atrocious +offences? + +I had been obliged to spend the remainder of the night upon which I had +been apprehended, in prison. During the interval I had thrown off every +vestige of disguise, and appeared the next morning in my own person. I +was of course easily identified; and, this being the whole with which +the magistrates before whom I now stood thought themselves concerned, +they were proceeding to make out an order for my being conducted back to +my own county. I suspended the despatch of this measure by observing +that I had something to disclose. This is an overture to which men +appointed for the administration of criminal justice never fail to +attend. + +I went before the magistrates, to whose office Gines and his comrade +conducted me, fully determined to publish those astonishing secrets of +which I had hitherto been the faithful depository; and, once for all, to +turn the tables upon my accuser. It was time that the real criminal +should be the sufferer, and not that innocence should for ever labour +under the oppression of guilt. + +I said that "I had always protested my innocence, and must now repeat +the protest." + +"In that case," retorted the senior magistrate abruptly, "what can you +have to disclose? If you are innocent, that is no business of ours! We +act officially." + +"I always declared," continued I, "that I was the perpetrator of no +guilt, but that the guilt wholly belonged to my accuser. He privately +conveyed these effects among my property, and then charged me with the +robbery. I now declare more than that, that this man is a murderer, that +I detected his criminality, and that, for that reason, he is determined +to deprive me of life. I presume, gentlemen, that you do consider it as +your business to take this declaration. I am persuaded you will be by no +means disposed, actively or passively, to contribute to the atrocious +injustice under which I suffer, to the imprisonment and condemnation of +an innocent man, in order that a murderer may go free. I suppressed this +story as long as I could. I was extremely averse to be the author of the +unhappiness or the death of a human being. But all patience and +submission have their limits." + +"Give me leave, sir," rejoined the magistrate, with an air of affected +moderation, "to ask you two questions. Were you any way aiding, +abetting, or contributing to this murder?" + +"No." + +"And pray, sir, who is this Mr. Falkland? and what may have been the +nature of your connection with him?" + +"Mr. Falkland is a gentleman of six thousand per annum. I lived with him +as his secretary." + +"In other words, you were his servant?" + +"As you please." + +"Very well, sir; that is quite enough for me. First, I have to tell you, +as a magistrate, that I can have nothing to do with your declaration. If +you had been concerned in the murder you talk of, that would alter the +case. But it is out of all reasonable rule for a magistrate to take an +information from a felon, except against his accomplices. Next, I think +it right to observe to you, in my own proper person, that you appear to +me to be the most impudent rascal I ever saw. Why, are you such an ass +as to suppose, that the sort of story you have been telling, can be of +any service to you, either here or at the assizes, or any where else? A +fine time of it indeed it would be, if, when gentlemen of six thousand a +year take up their servants for robbing them, those servants could trump +up such accusations as these, and could get any magistrate or court of +justice to listen to them! Whether or no the felony with which you stand +charged would have brought you to the gallows, I will not pretend to +say: but I am sure this story will. There would be a speedy end to all +order and good government, if fellows that trample upon ranks and +distinctions in this atrocious sort were upon any consideration suffered +to get off." + +"And do you refuse, sir, to attend to the particulars of the charge I +allege?" + +"Yes, sir, I do.--But, if I did not, pray what witnesses have you of the +murder?" + +This question staggered me. + +"None. But I believe I can make out a circumstantial proof, of a nature +to force attention from the most indifferent hearer." + +"So I thought.--Officers, take him from the bar!" + +Such was the success of this ultimate resort on my part, upon which I +had built with such undoubting confidence. Till now, I had conceived +that the unfavourable situation in which I was placed was prolonged by +my own forbearance; and I had determined to endure all that human nature +could support, rather than have recourse to this extreme recrimination. +That idea secretly consoled me under all my calamities: it was a +voluntary sacrifice, and was cheerfully made. I thought myself allied to +the army of martyrs and confessors; I applauded my fortitude and +self-denial; and I pleased myself with the idea, that I had the power, +though I hoped never to employ it, by an unrelenting display of my +resources, to put an end at once to my sufferings and persecutions. + +And this at last was the justice of mankind! A man, under certain +circumstances, shall not be heard in the detection of a crime, because +he has not been a participator of it! The story of a flagitious murder +shall be listened to with indifference, while an innocent man is hunted, +like a wild beast, to the furthest corners of the earth! Six thousand a +year shall protect a man from accusation; and the validity of an +impeachment shall be superseded, because the author of it is a servant! + +I was conducted back to the very prison from which a few months before I +had made my escape. With a bursting heart I entered those walls, +compelled to feel that all my more than Herculean labours served for my +own torture, and for no other end. Since my escape from prison I had +acquired some knowledge of the world; I had learned by bitter +experience, by how many links society had a hold upon me, and how +closely the snares of despotism beset me. I no longer beheld the world, +as my youthful fancy had once induced me to do, as a scene in which to +hide or to appear, and to exhibit the freaks of a wanton vivacity. I saw +my whole species as ready, in one mode or other, to be made the +instruments of the tyrant. Hope died away in the bottom of my heart. +Shut up for the first night in my dungeon, I was seized at intervals +with temporary frenzy. From time to time, I rent the universal silence +with the roarings of unsupportable despair. But this was a transient +distraction. I soon returned to the sober recollection of myself and my +miseries. + +My prospects were more gloomy, and my situation apparently more +irremediable, than ever. I was exposed again, if that were of any +account, to the insolence and tyranny that are uniformly exercised +within those walls. Why should I repeat the loathsome tale of all that +was endured by me, and is endured by every man who is unhappy enough to +fall under the government of these consecrated ministers of national +jurisprudence? The sufferings I had already experienced, my anxieties, +my flight, the perpetual expectation of being discovered, worse than the +discovery itself, would perhaps have been enough to satisfy the most +insensible individual, in the court of his own conscience, if I had even +been the felon I was pretended to be. But the law has neither eyes, nor +ears, nor bowels of humanity; and it turns into marble the hearts of all +those that are nursed in its principles. + +I however once more recovered my spirit of determination. I resolved +that, while I had life, I would never be deserted by this spirit. +Oppressed, annihilated I might be; but, if I died, I would die +resisting. What use, what advantage, what pleasurable sentiment, could +arise from a tame surrender? There is no man that is ignorant, that to +humble yourself at the feet of the law is a bootless task; in her courts +there is no room for amendment and reformation. + +My fortitude may to some persons appear above the standard of human +nature. But if I draw back the veil from my heart they will readily +confess their mistake. My heart bled at every pore. My resolution was +not the calm sentiment of philosophy and reason. It was a gloomy and +desperate purpose: the creature, not of hope, but of a mind austerely +held to its design, that felt, as it were, satisfied with the naked +effort, and prepared to give success or miscarriage to the winds. It was +to this miserable condition, which might awaken sympathy in the most +hardened bosom, that Mr. Falkland had reduced me. + +In the mean time, strange as it may seem, here, in prison, subject to +innumerable hardships, and in the assured expectation of a sentence of +death, I recovered my health. I ascribe this to the state of my mind, +which was now changed, from perpetual anxiety, terror, and alarm, the +too frequent inmates of a prison, but which I upon this occasion did not +seem to bring along with me, to a desperate firmness. + +I anticipated the event of my trial. I determined once more to escape +from my prison; nor did I doubt of my ability to effect at least this +first step towards my future preservation. The assizes however were +near, and there were certain considerations, unnecessary to be detailed, +that persuaded me there might be benefit in waiting till my trial should +actually be terminated, before I made my attempt. + +It stood upon the list as one of the latest to be brought forward. I was +therefore extremely surprised to find it called out of its order, early +on the morning of the second day. But, if this were unexpected, how +much greater was my astonishment, when my prosecutor was called, to +find neither Mr. Falkland, nor Mr. Forester, nor a single individual of +any description, appear against me! The recognizances into which my +prosecutors had entered were declared to be forfeited; and I was +dismissed without further impediment from the bar. + +The effect which this incredible reverse produced upon my mind it is +impossible to express. I, who had come to that bar with the sentence of +death already in idea ringing in my ears, to be told that I was free to +transport myself whithersoever I pleased! Was it for this that I had +broken through so many locks and bolts, and the adamantine walls of my +prison; that I had passed so many anxious days, and sleepless, +spectre-haunted nights; that I had racked my invention for expedients of +evasion and concealment; that my mind had been roused to an energy of +which I could scarcely have believed it capable; that my existence had +been enthralled to an ever-living torment, such as I could scarcely have +supposed it in man to endure? Great God! what is man? Is he thus blind +to the future, thus totally unsuspecting of what is to occur in the next +moment of his existence? I have somewhere read, that heaven in mercy +hides from us the future incidents of our life. My own experience does +not well accord with this assertion. In this instance at least I should +have been saved from insupportable labour and undescribable anguish, +could I have foreseen the catastrophe of this most interesting +transaction. + + + + +CHAPTER XII. + + +It was not long before I took my everlasting leave of this detested and +miserable scene. My heart was for the present too full of astonishment +and exultation in my unexpected deliverance, to admit of anxiety about +the future. I withdrew from the town; I rambled with a slow and +thoughtful pace, now bursting with exclamation, and now buried in +profound and undefinable reverie. Accident led me towards the very heath +which had first sheltered me, when, upon a former occasion, I broke out +of my prison. I wandered among its cavities and its valleys. It was a +forlorn and desolate solitude. I continued here I know not how long. +Night at length overtook me unperceived, and I prepared to return for +the present to the town I had quitted. + +It was now perfectly dark, when two men, whom I had not previously +observed, sprung upon me from behind. They seized me by the arms, and +threw me upon the ground. I had no time for resistance or recollection. +I could however perceive that one of them was the diabolical Gines. They +blindfolded, gagged me, and hurried me I knew not whither. As we passed +along in silence, I endeavoured to conjecture what could be the meaning +of this extraordinary violence. I was strongly impressed with the idea, +that, after the event of this morning, the most severe and painful part +of my history was past; and, strange as it may seem, I could not +persuade myself to regard with alarm this unexpected attack. It might +however be some new project, suggested by the brutal temper and +unrelenting animosity of Gines. + +I presently found that we were returned into the town I had just +quitted. They led me into a house, and, as soon as they had taken +possession of a room freed me from the restraints they had before +imposed Here Gines informed me with a malicious grin that no harm was +intended me, and therefore I should show most sense in keeping myself +quiet. I perceived that we were in an inn; I overheard company in a room +at no great distance from us, and therefore was now as thoroughly aware +as he could be, that there was at present little reason to stand in fear +of any species of violence, and that it would be time enough to resist, +when they attempted to conduct me from the inn in the same manner that +they had brought me into it. I was not without some curiosity to see the +conclusion that was to follow upon so extraordinary a commencement. + +The preliminaries I have described were scarcely completed, before Mr. +Falkland entered the room. I remember Collins, when he first +communicated to me the particulars of our patron's history, observed +that he was totally unlike the man he had once been. I had no means of +ascertaining the truth of that observation. But it was strikingly +applicable to the spectacle which now presented itself to my eyes, +though, when I last beheld this unhappy man, he had been a victim to the +same passions, a prey to the same undying remorse, as now. Misery was at +that time inscribed in legible characters upon his countenance. But now +he appeared like nothing that had ever been visible in human shape. His +visage was haggard, emaciated, and fleshless. His complexion was a dun +and tarnished red, the colour uniform through every region of the face, +and suggested the idea of its being burnt and parched by the eternal +fire that burned within him. His eyes were red, quick, wandering, full +of suspicion and rage. His hair was neglected, ragged, and floating. +His whole figure was thin, to a degree that suggested the idea rather of +a skeleton than a person actually alive. Life seemed hardly to be the +capable inhabitant of so woe-begone and ghost-like a figure. The taper +of wholesome life was expired; but passion, and fierceness, and frenzy, +were able for the present to supply its place. + +I was to the utmost degree astonished and shocked at the sight of +him.--He sternly commanded my conductors to leave the room. + +"Well, sir, I have this day successfully exerted myself to save your +life from the gallows. A fortnight ago you did what you were able to +bring my life to that ignominious close. + +"Were you so stupid and undistinguishing as not to know that the +preservation of your life was the uniform object of my exertions? Did +not I maintain you in prison? Did not I endeavour to prevent your being +sent thither? Could you mistake the bigoted and obstinate conduct of +Forester, in offering a hundred guineas for your apprehension, for mine? + +"I had my eye upon you in all your wanderings. You have taken no +material step through their whole course with which I have not been +acquainted. I meditated to do you good. I have spilt no blood but that +of Tyrrel: that was in the moment of passion; and it has been the +subject of my uninterrupted and hourly remorse. I have connived at no +man's fate but that of the Hawkinses: they could no otherwise have been +saved, than by my acknowledging myself a murderer. The rest of my life +has been spent in acts of benevolence. + +"I meditated to do you good. For that reason I was willing to prove you. +You pretended to act towards me with consideration and forbearance. If +you had persisted in that to the end, I would yet have found a way to +reward you. I left you to your own discretion. You might show the +impotent malignity of your own heart; but, in the circumstances in which +you were then placed, I knew you could not hurt me. Your forbearance has +proved, as I all along suspected, empty and treacherous. You have +attempted to blast my reputation. You have sought to disclose the select +and eternal secret of my soul. Because you have done that, I will never +forgive you. I will remember it to my latest breath. The memory shall +survive me, when my existence is no more. Do you think you are out of +the reach of my power, because a court of justice has acquitted you?" + +While Mr. Falkland was speaking a sudden distemper came over his +countenance, his whole frame was shaken by an instantaneous convulsion, +and he staggered to a chair. In about three minutes he recovered. + +"Yes," said he, "I am still alive. I shall live for days, and months, +and years; the power that made me, of whatever kind it be, can only +determine how long. I live the guardian of my reputation. That, and to +endure a misery such as man never endured, are the only ends to which I +live. But, when I am no more, my fame shall still survive. My character +shall be revered as spotless and unimpeachable by all posterity, as long +as the name of Falkland shall be repeated in the most distant regions of +the many-peopled globe." + +Having said this, he returned to the discourse which more immediately +related to my future condition and happiness. + +"There is one condition," said he, "upon which you may obtain some +mitigation of your future calamity. It is for that purpose that I have +sent for you. Listen to my proposal with deliberation and sobriety. +Remember, that the insanity is not less to trifle with the resolved +determination of my soul, than it would be to pull a mountain upon your +head that hung trembling upon the edge of the mighty Apennine! + +"I insist then upon your signing a paper, declaring, in the most solemn +manner, that I am innocent of murder, and that the charge you alleged at +the office in Bow-street is false, malicious, and groundless. Perhaps +you may scruple out of a regard to truth. Is truth then entitled to +adoration for its own sake, and not for the sake of the happiness it is +calculated to produce? Will a reasonable man sacrifice to barren truth, +when benevolence, humanity, and every consideration that is dear to the +human heart, require that it should be superseded? It is probable that I +may never make use of this paper, but I require it, as the only +practicable reparation to the honour you have assailed. This is what I +had to propose. I expect your answer." + +"Sir," answered I, "I have heard you to an end, and I stand in need of +no deliberation to enable me to answer you in the negative. You took me +up a raw and inexperienced boy, capable of being moulded to any form you +pleased. But you have communicated to me volumes of experience in a very +short period. I am no longer irresolute and pliable. What is the power +you retain over my fate I am unable to discover. You may destroy me; but +you cannot make me tremble. I am not concerned to enquire, whether what +I have suffered flowed from you by design or otherwise; whether you were +the author of my miseries, or only connived at them. This I know, that I +have suffered too exquisitely on your account, for me to feel the least +remaining claim on your part to my making any voluntary sacrifice. + +"You say that benevolence and humanity require this sacrifice of me. No; +it would only be a sacrifice to your mad and misguided love of fame,--to +that passion which has been the source of all your miseries, of the most +tragical calamities to others, and of every misfortune that has happened +to me. I have no forbearance to exercise towards that passion. If you be +not yet cured of this tremendous and sanguinary folly, at least I will +do nothing to cherish it. I know not whether from my youth I was +destined for a hero; but I may thank you for having taught me a lesson +of insurmountable fortitude. + +"What is it that you require of me? that I should sign away my own +reputation for the better maintaining of yours. Where is the equality of +that? What is it that casts me at such an immense distance below you, as +to make every thing that relates to me wholly unworthy of consideration? +You have been educated in the prejudice of birth. I abhor that +prejudice. You have made me desperate, and I utter what that desperation +suggests. + +"You will tell me perhaps that I have no reputation to lose; that, while +you are esteemed faultless and unblemished, I am universally reputed a +thief, a suborner, and a calumniator. Be it so. I will never do any +thing to countenance those imputations. The more I am destitute of the +esteem of mankind, the more careful I will be to preserve my own. I will +never from fear, or any other mistaken motive, do any thing of which I +ought to be ashamed. + +"You are determined to be for ever my enemy. I have in no degree +deserved this eternal abhorrence. I have always esteemed and pitied you. +For a considerable time I rather chose to expose myself to every kind +of misfortune, than disclose the secret that was so dear to you. I was +not deterred by your menaces--(what could you make me suffer more than +I actually suffered?)--but by the humanity of my own heart; in which, +and not in means of violence, you ought to have reposed your confidence. +What is the mysterious vengeance that you can yet execute against me? +You menaced me before; you can menace no worse now. You are wearing out +the springs of terror. Do with me as you please; you teach me to hear +you with an unshrinking and desperate firmness. Recollect yourself! I +did not proceed to the step with which you reproach me, till I was +apparently urged to the very last extremity. I had suffered as much as +human nature can suffer; I had lived in the midst of eternal alarm and +unintermitted watchfulness; I had twice been driven to purposes of +suicide. I am now sorry however, that the step of which you complain was +ever adopted. But, urged to exasperation by an unintermitted rigour, I +had no time to cool or to deliberate. Even at present I cherish no +vengeance against you. All that is reasonable, all that can really +contribute to your security, I will readily concede; but I will not be +driven to an act repugnant to all reason, integrity, and justice." + +Mr. Falkland listened to me with astonishment and impatience. He had +entertained no previous conception of the firmness I displayed. Several +times he was convulsed with the fury that laboured in his breast. Once +and again he betrayed an intention to interrupt; but he was restrained +by the collectedness of my manner, and perhaps by a desire to be +acquainted with the entire state of my mind. Finding that I had +concluded, he paused for a moment; his passion seemed gradually to +enlarge, till it was no longer capable of control. + +"It is well!" said he, gnashing his teeth, and stamping upon the ground. +"You refuse the composition I offer! I have no power to persuade you to +compliance! You defy me! At least I have a power respecting you, and +that power I will exercise; a power that shall grind you into atoms. I +condescend to no more expostulation. I know what I am, and what I can +be. I know what you are, and what fate is reserved for you!" + +Saying this he quitted the room. + +Such were the particulars of this memorable scene. The impression it has +left upon my understanding is indelible. The figure and appearance of +Mr. Falkland, his death-like weakness and decay, his more than mortal +energy and rage, the words that he spoke, the motives that animated him, +produced one compounded effect upon my mind that nothing of the same +nature could ever parallel. The idea of his misery thrilled through my +frame. How weak in comparison of it is the imaginary hell, which the +great enemy of mankind is represented as carrying every where about with +him! + +From this consideration, my mind presently turned to the menaces he had +vented against myself. They were all mysterious and undefined. He had +talked of power, but had given no hint from which I could collect in +what he imagined it to consist. He had talked of misery, but had not +dropped a syllable respecting the nature of the misery to be inflicted. + +I sat still for some time, ruminating on these thoughts. Neither Mr. +Falkland nor any other person appeared to disturb my meditations. I +rose, went out of the room, and from the inn into the street. No one +offered to molest me. It was strange! What was the nature of this +power, from which I was to apprehend so much, yet which seemed to leave +me at perfect liberty? I began to imagine that all I had heard from this +dreadful adversary was mere madness and extravagance, and that he was at +length deprived of the use of reason, which had long served him only as +a medium of torment. Yet was it likely in that case that he should be +able to employ Gines and his associate, who had just been his +instruments of violence upon my person? + +I proceeded along the streets with considerable caution. I looked before +me and behind me, as well as the darkness would allow me to do, that I +might not again be hunted in sight by some men of stratagem and violence +without my perceiving it. I went not, as before, beyond the limits of +the town, but considered the streets, the houses, and the inhabitants, +as affording some degree of security. I was still walking with my mind +thus full of suspicion and forecast, when I discovered Thomas, that +servant of Mr. Falkland whom I have already more than once had occasion +to mention. He advanced towards me with an air so blunt and direct, as +instantly to remove from me the idea of any thing insidious in his +purpose; besides that I had always felt the character of Thomas, rustic +and uncultivated as it was, to be entitled to a more than common portion +of esteem. + +"Thomas," said I, as he advanced, "I hope you are willing to give me +joy, that I am at length delivered from the dreadful danger which for +many months haunted me so unmercifully." + +"No," rejoined Thomas, roughly; "I be not at all willing. I do not know +what to make of myself in this affair. While you were in prison in that +miserable fashion, I felt all at one almost as if I loved you: and now +that that is over, and you are turned out loose in the world to do your +worst, my blood rises at the very sight of you. To look at you, you are +almost that very lad Williams for whom I could with pleasure, as it +were, have laid down my life; and yet, behind that smiling face there +lie robbery, and lying, and every thing that is ungrateful and +murderous. Your last action was worse than all the rest. How could you +find in your heart to revive that cruel story about Mr. Tyrrel, which +every body had agreed, out of regard to the squire, never to mention +again, and of which I know, and you know, he is as innocent as the child +unborn? There are causes and reasons, or else I could have wished from +the bottom of my soul never to have set eyes on you again." + +"And you still persist in your hard thoughts of me?" + +"Worse! I think worse of you than ever! Before, I thought you as bad as +man could be. I wonder from my soul what you are to do next. But you +make good the old saying, 'Needs must go, that the devil drives.'" + +"And so there is never to be an end of my misfortunes! What can Mr. +Falkland contrive for me worse than the ill opinion and enmity of all +mankind?" + +"Mr. Falkland contrive! He is the best friend you have in the world, +though you are the basest traitor to him. Poor man! it makes one's heart +ache to look at him; he is the very image of grief. And it is not clear +to me that it is not all owing to you. At least you have given the +finishing lift to the misfortune that was already destroying him. There +have been the devil and all to pay between him and squire Forester. The +squire is right raving mad with my master, for having outwitted him in +the matter of the trial, and saved your life. He swears that you shall +be taken up and tried all over again at the next assizes; but my master +is resolute, and I believe will carry it his own way. He says indeed +that the law will not allow squire Forester to have his will in this. To +see him ordering every thing for your benefit, and taking all your +maliciousness as mild and innocent as a lamb, and to think of your vile +proceedings against him, is a sight one shall not see again, go all the +world over. For God's sake, repent of your reprobate doings, and make +what little reparation is in your power! Think of your poor soul, before +you awake, as to be sure one of these days you will, in fire and +brimstone everlasting!" + +Saying this, he held out his hand and took hold of mine. The action +seemed strange; but I at first thought it the unpremeditated result of +his solemn and well-intended adjuration. I felt however that he put +something into my hand. The next moment he quitted his hold, and +hastened from me with the swiftness of an arrow. What he had thus given +me was a bank-note of twenty pounds. I had no doubt that he had been +charged to deliver it to me from Mr. Falkland. + +What was I to infer? what light did it throw upon the intentions of my +inexorable persecutor? his animosity against me was as great as ever; +that I had just had confirmed to me from his own mouth. Yet his +animosity appeared to be still tempered with the remains of humanity. He +prescribed to it a line, wide enough to embrace the gratification of his +views, and within the boundaries of that line it stopped. But this +discovery carried no consolation to my mind. I knew not what portion of +calamity I was fated to endure, before his jealousy of dishonour, and +inordinate thirst of fame would deem themselves satisfied. + +Another question offered itself. Was I to receive the money which had +just been put into my hands? the money of a man who had inflicted upon +me injuries, less than those which he had entailed upon himself, but the +greatest that one man can inflict upon another? who had blasted my +youth, who had destroyed my peace, who had held me up to the abhorrence +of mankind, and rendered me an outcast upon the face of the earth? who +had forced the basest and most atrocious falsehoods, and urged them with +a seriousness and perseverance which produced universal belief? who, an +hour before, had vowed against me inexorable enmity, and sworn to entail +upon me misery without end? Would not this conduct on my part betray a +base and abject spirit, that crouched under tyranny, and kissed the +hands that were imbrued in my blood? + +If these reasons appeared strong, neither was the other side without +reasons in reply. I wanted the money: not for any purpose of vice or +superfluity, but for those purposes without which life cannot subsist. +Man ought to be able, wherever placed, to find for himself the means of +existence; but I was to open a new scene of life, to remove to some +distant spot, to be prepared against all the ill-will of mankind, and +the unexplored projects of hostility of a most accomplished foe. The +actual means of existence are the property of all. What should hinder me +from taking that of which I was really in want, when, in taking it, I +risked no vengeance, and perpetrated no violence? The property in +question will be beneficial to me, and the voluntary surrender of it is +accompanied with no injury to its late proprietor; what other condition +can be necessary to render the use of it on my part a duty? He that +lately possessed it has injured me; does that alter its value as a +medium of exchange? He will boast, perhaps of the imaginary obligation +he has conferred on me: surely to shrink from a thing in itself right +from any such apprehension, can be the result only of pusillanimity and +cowardice! + + + + +CHAPTER XIII. + + +Influenced by these reasonings, I determined to retain what had thus +been put into my hands. My next care was in regard to the scene I should +choose, as the retreat of that life which I had just saved from the +grasp of the executioner. The danger to which I was exposed of forcible +interruption in my pursuits, was probably, in some respects, less now +than it had been previously to this crisis. Besides, that I was +considerably influenced in this deliberation by the strong loathing I +conceived for the situations in which I had lately been engaged. I knew +not in what mode Mr. Falkland intended to exercise his vengeance against +me; but I was seized with so unconquerable an aversion to disguise, and +the idea of spending my life in personating a fictitious character, that +I could not, for the present at least, reconcile my mind to any thing of +that nature. The same kind of disgust I had conceived for the +metropolis, where I had spent so many hours of artifice, sadness, and +terror. I therefore decided in favour of the project which had formerly +proved amusing to my imagination, of withdrawing to some distant, rural +scene, a scene of calmness and obscurity, where for a few years at +least, perhaps during the life of Mr. Falkland, I might be hidden from +the world, recover the wounds my mind had received in this fatal +connection, methodise and improve the experience which had been +accumulated, cultivate the faculties I in any degree possessed, and +employ the intervals of these occupations in simple industry, and the +intercourse of guileless, uneducated, kind-intentioned minds. The +menaces of my persecutor seemed to forebode the inevitable interruption +of this system. But I deemed it wise to put these menaces out of my +consideration I compared them to death, which must infallibly overtake +us we know not when; but the possibility of whose arrival next year, +next week, to-morrow, must be left out of the calculation of him who +would enter upon any important or well-concerted undertaking. + +Such were the ideas that determined my choice. Thus did my youthful mind +delineate the system of distant years, even when the threats of instant +calamity still sounded in my ears. I was inured to the apprehension of +mischief, till at last the hoarse roarings of the beginning tempest had +lost their power of annihilating my peace. I however thought it +necessary, while I was most palpably within the sphere of the enemy, to +exert every practicable degree of vigilance. I was careful not to incur +the hazards of darkness and solitude. When I left the town it was with +the stage-coach, an obvious source of protection against glaring and +enormous violence. Meanwhile I found myself no more exposed to +molestation in my progress, than the man in the world who should have +had the least reason for apprehensions of this nature. As the distance +increased, I relaxed something in my precaution, though still awake to a +sense of danger, and constantly pursued with the image of my foe. I +fixed upon an obscure market-town in Wales as the chosen seat of my +operations. This place recommended itself to my observation as I was +wandering in quest of an abode. It was clean, cheerful, and of great +simplicity of appearance. It was at a distance from any public and +frequented road, and had nothing which could deserve the name of trade. +The face of nature around it was agreeably diversified, being partly +wild and romantic, and partly rich and abundant in production. + +Here I solicited employment in two professions; the first, that of a +watchmaker, in which though the instructions I had received were few, +they were eked out and assisted by a mind fruitful in mechanical +invention; the other, that of an instructor in mathematics and its +practical application, geography, astronomy, land-surveying, and +navigation. Neither of these was a very copious source of emolument in +the obscure retreat I had chosen for myself; but, if my receipts were +slender, my disbursements were still fewer. In this little town I became +acquainted with the vicar, the apothecary, the lawyer, and the rest of +the persons who, time out of mind, had been regarded as the top gentry +of the place. Each of these centred in himself a variety of occupations. +There was little in the appearance of the vicar that reminded you of his +profession, except on the recurring Sunday. At other times he +condescended, with his evangelical hand to guide the plough, or to drive +the cows from the field to the farm-yard for the milking. The apothecary +occasionally officiated as a barber, and the lawyer was the village +schoolmaster. + +By all these persons I was received with kindness and hospitality. Among +people thus remote from the bustle of human life there is an open spirit +of confidence, by means of which a stranger easily finds access to their +benevolence and good-will. My manners had never been greatly debauched +from the simplicity of rural life by the scenes through which I had +passed; and the hardships I had endured had given additional mildness to +my character. In the theatre upon which I was now placed I had no rival. +My mechanical occupation had hitherto been a non-resident; and the +schoolmaster, who did not aspire to the sublime heights of science I +professed to communicate, was willing to admit me as a partner in the +task of civilising the unpolished manners of the inhabitants. For the +parson, civilisation was no part of his trade; his business was with the +things of a better life, not with the carnal concerns of this material +scene; in truth, his thoughts were principally occupied with his oatmeal +and his cows. + +These however were not the only companions which this remote retirement +afforded me. There was a family of a very different description, of +which I gradually became the chosen intimate. The father was a shrewd, +sensible, rational man, but who had turned his principal attention to +subjects of agriculture. His wife was a truly admirable and +extraordinary woman. She was the daughter of a Neapolitan nobleman, who, +after having visited, and made a considerable figure, in every country +in Europe, had at length received the blow of fate in this village. He +had been banished his country upon suspicion of religious and political +heresy, and his estates confiscated. With this only child, like Prospero +in the Tempest, he had withdrawn himself to one of the most obscure and +uncultivated regions of the world. Very soon however after his arrival +in Wales he had been seized with a malignant fever, which carried him +off in three days. He died possessed of no other property than a few +jewels, and a bill of credit, to no considerable amount, upon an English +banker. + +Here then was the infant Laura, left in a foreign country, and without +a single friend. The father of her present husband was led by motives of +pure humanity to seek to mitigate the misfortunes of the dying Italian. +Though a plain uninstructed man, with no extraordinary refinement of +intellect, there was something in his countenance that determined the +stranger in his present forlorn and melancholy situation, to make him +his executor, and the guardian of his daughter. The Neapolitan +understood enough of English to explain his wishes to this friendly +attendant of his death-bed. As his circumstances were narrow, the +servants of the stranger, two Italians, a male and a female, were sent +back to their own country soon after the death of their master. + +Laura was at this time eight years of age. At these tender years she had +been susceptible of little direct instruction; and, as she grew up, even +the memory of her father became, from year to year, more vague and +indistinct in her mind. But there was something she derived from her +father, whether along with the life he bestowed, or as the consequence +of his instruction and manners, which no time could efface. Every added +year of her life contributed to develop the fund of her accomplishments. +She read, she observed, she reflected. Without instructors, she taught +herself to draw, to sing, and to understand the more polite European +languages. As she had no society in this remote situation but that of +peasants, she had no idea of honour or superiority to be derived from +her acquisitions; but pursued them from a secret taste, and as the +sources of personal enjoyment. + +A mutual attachment gradually arose between her and the only son of her +guardian. His father led him, from early youth, to the labours and the +sports of the field, and there was little congeniality between his +pursuits and those of Laura. But this was a defect that she was slow to +discover. She had never been accustomed to society in her chosen +amusements, and habit at that time even made her conceive, that they +were indebted to solitude for an additional relish. The youthful rustic +had great integrity, great kindness of heart, and was a lad of excellent +sense. He was florid, well-proportioned, and the goodness of his +disposition made his manners amiable. Accomplishments greater than these +she had never seen in human form, since the death of her father. In +fact, she is scarcely to be considered as a sufferer in this instance; +since, in her forlorn and destitute condition, it is little probable, +when we consider the habits and notions that now prevail, that her +accomplishments, unassisted by fortune, would have procured her an equal +alliance in marriage. + +When she became a mother her heart opened to a new affection. The idea +now presented itself, which had never occurred before, that in her +children at least she might find the partners and companions of her +favourite employments. She was, at the time of my arrival, mother of +four, the eldest of which was a son. To all of them she had been a most +assiduous instructor. It was well for her perhaps that she obtained this +sphere for the exercise of her mind. It came just at the period when the +charm which human life derives from novelty is beginning to wear off. It +gave her new activity and animation. It is perhaps impossible that the +refinements of which human nature is capable should not, after a time, +subside into sluggishness, if they be not aided by the influence of +society and affection. + +The son of the Welch farmer by this admirable woman was about seventeen +years of age at the time of my settlement in their neighbourhood. His +eldest sister was one year younger than himself. The whole family +composed a group, with which a lover of tranquillity and virtue would +have delighted to associate in any situation. It is easy therefore to +conceive how much I rejoiced in their friendship, in this distant +retirement, and suffering, as I felt myself, from the maltreatment and +desertion of my species. The amiable Laura had a wonderful quickness of +eye, and rapidity of apprehension; but this feature in her countenance +was subdued by a sweetness of disposition, such as I never in any other +instance saw expressed in the looks of a human being. She soon +distinguished me by her kindness and friendship; for, living as she had +done, though familiar with the written productions of a cultivated +intellect, she had never seen the thing itself realised in a living +being, except in the person of her father. She delighted to converse +with me upon subjects of literature and taste, and she eagerly invited +my assistance in the education of her children. The son, though young, +had been so happily improved and instructed by his mother, that I found +in him nearly all the most essential qualities we require in a friend. +Engagement and inclination equally led me to pass a considerable part of +every day in this agreeable society. Laura treated me as if I had been +one of the family; and I sometimes flattered myself that I might one day +become such in reality. What an enviable resting-place for me, who had +known nothing but calamity, and had scarcely dared to look for sympathy +and kindness in the countenance of a human being! + +The sentiments of friendship which early disclosed themselves between me +and the member of this amiable family daily became stronger. At every +interview, the confidence reposed in me by the mother increased. While +our familiarity gained in duration, it equally gained in that subtlety +of communication by which it seemed to shoot forth its roots in every +direction. There are a thousand little evanescent touches in the +development of a growing friendship, that are neither thought of, nor +would be understood, between common acquaintances. I honoured and +esteemed the respectable Laura like a mother; for, though the difference +of our ages was by no means sufficient to authorise the sentiment, it +was irresistibly suggested to me by the fact of her always being +presented to my observation under the maternal character. Her son was a +lad of great understanding, generosity, and feeling, and of no +contemptible acquirements; while his tender years, and the uncommon +excellence of his mother, subtracted something from the independence of +his judgment, and impressed him with a sort of religious deference for +her will. In the eldest daughter I beheld the image of Laura; for that I +felt attached to her for the present; and I sometimes conceived it +probable that hereafter I might learn to love her for her own +sake.--Alas, it was thus that I amused myself with the visions of distant +years, while I stood in reality on the brink of the precipice! + +It will perhaps be thought strange that I never once communicated the +particulars of my story to this amiable matron, or to my young friend, +for such I may also venture to call him, her son. But in truth I +abhorred the memory of this story; I placed all my hopes of happiness in +the prospect of its being consigned to oblivion. I fondly flattered +myself that such would be the event: in the midst of my unlooked-for +happiness, I scarcely recollected, or, recollecting, was disposed to +yield but a small degree of credit to, the menaces of Mr. Falkland. + +One day, that I was sitting alone with the accomplished Laura, she +repeated his all-dreadful name. I started with astonishment, amazed +that a woman like this, who knew nobody, who lived as it were alone in a +corner of the universe, who had never in a single instance entered into +any fashionable circle, this admirable and fascinating hermit, should, +by some unaccountable accident, have become acquainted with this fatal +and tremendous name. Astonishment however was not my only sensation. I +became pale with terror; I rose from my seat; I attempted to sit down +again; I reeled out of the room, and hastened to bury myself in +solitude. The unexpectedness of the incident took from me all +precaution, and overwhelmed my faculties. The penetrating Laura observed +my behaviour; but nothing further occurred to excite her attention to it +at that time; and, concluding from my manner that enquiry would be +painful to me, she humanely suppressed her curiosity. + +I afterwards found that Mr. Falkland had been known to the father of +Laura; that he had been acquainted with the story of Count Malvesi, and +with a number of other transactions redounding in the highest degree to +the credit of the gallant Englishman. The Neapolitan had left letters in +which these transactions were recorded, and which spoke of Mr. Falkland +in the highest terms of panegyric. Laura had been used to regard every +little relic of her father with a sort of religious veneration; and, by +this accident, the name of Mr. Falkland was connected in her mind with +the sentiments of unbounded esteem. + +The scene by which I was surrounded was perhaps more grateful to me, +than it would have been to most other persons with my degree of +intellectual cultivation. Sore with persecution and distress, and +bleeding at almost every vein, there was nothing I so much coveted as +rest and tranquillity. It seemed as if my faculties were, at least for +the time, exhausted by the late preternatural intensity of their +exertions, and that they stood indispensably in need of a period of +comparative suspension. + +This was however but a temporary feeling. My mind had always been +active, and I was probably indebted to the sufferings I had endured, and +the exquisite and increased susceptibility they produced, for new +energies. I soon felt the desire of some additional and vigorous +pursuit. In this state of mind, I met by accident, in a neglected corner +of the house of one of my neighbours, with a general dictionary of four +of the northern languages. This incident gave a direction to my +thoughts. In my youth I had not been inattentive to languages. I +determined to attempt, at least for my own use, an etymological analysis +of the English language. I easily perceived, that this pursuit had one +advantage to a person in my situation, and that a small number of books, +consulted with this view, would afford employment for a considerable +time. I procured other dictionaries. In my incidental reading, I noted +the manner in which words were used, and applied these remarks to the +illustration of my general enquiry. I was unintermitted in my assiduity, +and my collections promised to accumulate. Thus I was provided with +sources both of industry and recreation, the more completely to divert +my thoughts from the recollection of my past misfortunes. + +In this state, so grateful to my feelings, week after week glided away +without interruption and alarm. The situation in which I was now placed +had some resemblance to that in which I had spent my earlier years, with +the advantage of a more attractive society, and a riper judgment. I +began to look back upon the intervening period as upon a distempered and +tormenting dream; or rather perhaps my feelings were like those of a +man recovered from an interval of raging delirium, from ideas of horror, +confusion, flight, persecution, agony, and despair! When I recollected +what I had undergone, it was not without satisfaction, as the +recollection of a thing that was past; every day augmented my hope that +it was never to return. Surely the dark and terrific menaces of Mr. +Falkland were rather the perturbed suggestions of his angry mind, than +the final result of a deliberate and digested system! How happy should I +feel, beyond the ordinary lot of man, if, after the terrors I had +undergone, I should now find myself unexpectedly restored to the +immunities of a human being! + +While I was thus soothing my mind with fond imaginations, it happened +that a few bricklayers and their labourers came over from a distance of +five or six miles, to work upon some additions to one of the better sort +of houses in the town, which had changed its tenant. No incident could +be more trivial than this, had it not been for a strange coincidence of +time between this circumstance, and a change which introduced itself +into my situation. This first manifested itself in a sort of shyness +with which I was treated, first by one person, and then another, of my +new-formed acquaintance. They were backward to enter into conversation +with me, and answered my enquiries with an awkward and embarrassed air. +When they met me in the street or the field, their countenances +contracted a cloud, and they endeavoured to shun me. My scholars quitted +me one after another; and I had no longer any employment in my +mechanical profession. It is impossible to describe the sensations, +which the gradual but uninterrupted progress of this revolution produced +in my mind. It seemed as if I had some contagious disease, from which +every man shrunk with alarm, and left me to perish unassisted and alone. +I asked one man and another to explain to me the meaning of these +appearances; but every one avoided the task, and answered in an evasive +and ambiguous manner. I sometimes supposed that it was all a delusion of +the imagination; till the repetition of the sensation brought the +reality too painfully home to my apprehension. There are few things that +give a greater shock to the mind, than a phenomenon in the conduct of +our fellow men, of great importance to our concerns, and for which we +are unable to assign any plausible reason. At times I was half inclined +to believe that the change was not in other men, but that some +alienation of my own understanding generated the horrid vision. I +endeavoured to awaken from my dream, and return to my former state of +enjoyment and happiness; but in vain. To the same consideration it may +be ascribed, that, unacquainted with the source of the evil, observing +its perpetual increase, and finding it, so far as I could perceive, +entirely arbitrary in its nature, I was unable to ascertain its limits, +or the degree in which it would finally overwhelm me. + +In the midst however of the wonderful and seemingly inexplicable nature +of this scene, there was one idea that instantly obtruded itself, and +that I could never after banish from my mind. It is Falkland! In vain I +struggled against the seeming improbability of the supposition. In vain +I said, "Mr. Falkland, wise as he is, and pregnant in resources, acts by +human, not by supernatural means. He may overtake me by surprise, and in +a manner of which I had no previous expectation; but he cannot produce a +great and notorious effect without some visible agency, however +difficult it may be to trace that agency to its absolute author. He +cannot, like those invisible personages who are supposed from time to +time to interfere in human affairs, ride in the whirlwind, shroud +himself in clouds and impenetrable darkness, and scatter destruction +upon the earth from his secret habitation." Thus it was that I bribed my +imagination, and endeavoured to persuade myself that my present +unhappiness originated in a different source from my former. All evils +appeared trivial to me, in comparison with the recollection and +perpetuation of my parent misfortune. I felt like a man distracted, by +the incoherence of my ideas to my present situation, excluding from it +the machinations of Mr. Falkland, on the one hand; and on the other, by +the horror I conceived at the bare possibility of again encountering his +animosity, after a suspension of many weeks, a suspension as I had hoped +for ever. An interval like this was an age to a person in the calamitous +situation I had so long experienced. But, in spite of my efforts, I +could not banish from my mind the dreadful idea. My original conceptions +of the genius and perseverance of Mr. Falkland had been such, that I +could with difficulty think any thing impossible to him. I knew not how +to set up my own opinions of material causes and the powers of the human +mind, as the limits of existence. Mr. Falkland had always been to my +imagination an object of wonder, and that which excites our wonder we +scarcely suppose ourselves competent to analyse. + +It may well be conceived, that one of the first persons to whom I +thought of applying for an explanation of this dreadful mystery was the +accomplished Laura. My disappointment here cut me to the heart. I was +not prepared for it. I recollected the ingenuousness of her nature, the +frankness of her manners, the partiality with which she had honoured me. +If I were mortified with the coldness, the ruggedness, and the cruel +mistake of principles with which the village inhabitants repelled my +enquiries, the mortification I suffered, only drove me more impetuously +to seek the cure of my griefs from this object of my admiration. "In +Laura," said I, "I am secure from these vulgar prejudices. I confide in +her justice. I am sure she will not cast me off unheard, nor without +strictly examining a question on all sides, in which every thing that is +valuable to a person she once esteemed, may be involved." + +Thus encouraging myself, I turned my steps to the place of her +residence. As I passed along I called up all my recollection, I summoned +my faculties. "I may be made miserable," said I, "but it shall not be +for want of any exertion of mine, that promises to lead to happiness. I +will be clear, collected, simple in narrative, ingenuous in +communication. I will leave nothing unsaid that the case may require. I +will not volunteer any thing that relates to my former transactions with +Mr. Falkland; but, if I find that my present calamity is connected with +those transactions, I will not fear but that by an honest explanation I +shall remove it." + +I knocked at the door. A servant appeared, and told me that her mistress +hoped I would excuse her; she must really beg to dispense with my visit. + +I was thunderstruck. I was rooted to the spot. I had been carefully +preparing my mind for every thing that I supposed likely to happen, but +this event had not entered into my calculations. I roused myself in a +partial degree, and walked away without uttering a word. + +I had not gone far before I perceived one of the workmen following me, +who put into my hands a billet. The contents were these:-- + +"MR. WILLIAMS, + +"Let me see you no more. I have a right at least to expect your +compliance with this requisition; and, upon that condition, I pardon the +enormous impropriety and guilt with which you have conducted yourself to +me and my family. + +"LAURA DENISON." + +The sensations with which I read these few lines are indescribable. I +found in them a dreadful confirmation of the calamity that on all sides +invaded me. But what I felt most was the unmoved coldness with which +they appeared to be written. This coldness from Laura, my comforter, my +friend, my mother! To dismiss, to cast me off for ever, without one +thought of compunction! + +I determined however, in spite of her requisition, and in spite of her +coldness, to have an explanation with her. I did not despair of +conquering the antipathy she harboured. I did not fear that I should +rouse her from the vulgar and unworthy conception, of condemning a man, +in points the most material to his happiness, without stating the +accusations that are urged against him, and without hearing him in +reply. + +Though I had no doubt, by means of resolution, of gaining access to her +in her house, yet I preferred taking her unprepared, and not warmed +against me by any previous contention. Accordingly, the next morning, at +the time she usually devoted to half an hour's air and exercise, I +hastened to her garden, leaped the paling, and concealed myself in an +arbour. Presently I saw, from my retreat, the younger part of the family +strolling through the garden, and from thence into the fields; but it +was not my business to be seen by them. I looked after them however with +earnestness, unobserved; and I could not help asking myself, with a +deep and heartfelt sigh, whether it were possible that I saw them now +for the last time? + +They had not advanced far into the fields, before their mother made her +appearance. I observed in her her usual serenity and sweetness of +countenance. I could feel my heart knocking against my ribs. My whole +frame was in a tumult. I stole out of the arbour; and, as I advanced +nearer, my pace became quickened. + +"For God's sake, madam," exclaimed I, "give me a hearing! Do not avoid +me!" + +She stood still. "No, sir," she replied, "I shall not avoid you. I +wished you to dispense with this meeting; but since I cannot obtain +that--I am conscious of no wrong; and therefore, though the meeting +gives me pain, it inspires me with no fear." + +"Oh, madam," answered I, "my friend! the object of all my reverence! +whom I once ventured to call my mother! can you wish not to hear me? Can +you have no anxiety for my justification, whatever may be the +unfavourable impression you may have received against me?" + +"Not an atom. I have neither wish nor inclination to hear you. That tale +which, in its plain and unadorned state, is destructive of the character +of him to whom it relates, no colouring can make an honest one." + +"Good God! Can you think of condemning a man when you have heard only +one side of his story?" + +"Indeed I can," replied she with dignity. "The maxim of hearing both +sides may be very well in some cases; but it would be ridiculous to +suppose that there are not cases, that, at the first mention, are too +clear to admit the shadow of a doubt. By a well-concerted defence you +may give me new reasons to admire your abilities; but I am acquainted +with them already. I can admire your abilities, without tolerating your +character." + +"Madam! Amiable, exemplary Laura! whom, in the midst of all your +harshness and inflexibility, I honour! I conjure you, by every thing +that is sacred, to tell me what it is that has filled you with this +sudden aversion to me." + +"No, sir; that you shall never obtain from me. I have nothing to say to +you. I stand still and hear you; because virtue disdains to appear +abashed and confounded in the presence of vice. Your conduct even at +this moment, in my opinion, condemns you. True virtue refuses the +drudgery of explanation and apology. True virtue shines by its own +light, and needs no art to set it off. You have the first principles of +morality as yet to learn." + +"And can you imagine, that the most upright conduct is always superior +to the danger of ambiguity?" + +"Exactly so. Virtue, sir, consists in actions, and not in words. The +good man and the bad are characters precisely opposite, not characters +distinguished from each other by imperceptible shades. The Providence +that rules us all, has not permitted us to be left without a clew in the +most important of all questions. Eloquence may seek to confound it; but +it shall be my care to avoid its deceptive influence. I do not wish to +have my understanding perverted, and all the differences of things +concealed from my apprehension." + +"Madam, madam! it would be impossible for you to hold this language, if +you had not always lived in this obscure retreat, if you had ever been +conversant with the passions and institutions of men." + +"It may be so. And, if that be the case, I have great reason to be +thankful to my God, who has thus enabled me to preserve the innocence of +my heart, and the integrity of my understanding." + +"Can you believe then that ignorance is the only, or the safest, +preservative of integrity?" + +"Sir, I told you at first, and I repeat to you again, that all your +declamation is in vain. I wish you would have saved me and yourself that +pain which is the only thing that can possibly result from it. But let +us suppose that virtue could ever be the equivocal thing you would have +me believe. Is it possible, if you had been honest, that you would not +have acquainted me with your story? Is it possible, that you would have +left me to have been informed of it by a mere accident, and with all the +shocking aggravations you well knew that accident would give it? Is it +possible you should have violated the most sacred of all trusts, and +have led me unknowingly to admit to the intercourse of my children a +character, which if, as you pretend, it is substantially honest, you +cannot deny to be blasted and branded in the face of the whole world? +Go, sir; I despise you. You are a monster and not a man. I cannot tell +whether my personal situation misleads me; but, to my thinking, this +last action of yours is worse than all the rest. Nature has constituted +me the protector of my children. I shall always remember and resent the +indelible injury you have done them. You have wounded me to the very +heart, and have taught me to what a pitch the villainy of man can +extend." + +"Madam, I can be silent no longer. I see that you have by some means +come to a hearing of the story of Mr. Falkland." + +"I have. I am astonished you have the effrontery to pronounce his name. +That name has been a denomination, as far back as my memory can reach, +for the most exalted of mortals, the wisest and most generous of men." + +"Madam, I owe it to myself to set you right on this subject. Mr. +Falkland--" + +"Mr. Williams, I see my children returning from the fields, and coming +this way. The basest action you ever did was the obtruding yourself upon +them as an instructor. I insist that you see them no more. I command you +to be silent. I command you to withdraw. If you persist in your absurd +resolution of expostulating with me, you must take some other time." + +I could continue no longer. I was in a manner heart-broken through the +whole of this dialogue. I could not think of protracting the pain of +this admirable woman, upon whom, though I was innocent of the crimes she +imputed to me, I had inflicted so much pain already. I yielded to the +imperiousness of her commands, and withdrew. + +I hastened, without knowing why, from the presence of Laura to my own +habitation. Upon entering the house, an apartment of which I occupied, I +found it totally deserted of its usual inhabitants. The woman and her +children were gone to enjoy the freshness of the breeze. The husband was +engaged in his usual out-door occupations. The doors of persons of the +lower order in this part of the country are secured, in the day-time, +only with a latch. I entered, and went into the kitchen of the family. +Here, as I looked round, my eyes accidentally glanced upon a paper lying +in one corner, which, by some association I was unable to explain, +roused in me a strong sensation of suspicion and curiosity. I eagerly +went towards it, caught it up, and found it to be the very paper of the +WONDERFUL AND SURPRISING HISTORY OF CALEB WILLIAMS, the discovery of +which, towards the close of my residence in London, had produced in me +such inexpressible anguish. + +This encounter at once cleared up all the mystery that hung upon my late +transactions. Abhorred and intolerable certainty succeeded to the doubts +which had haunted my mind. It struck me with the rapidity of lightning. +I felt a sudden torpor and sickness that pervaded every fibre of my +frame. + +Was there no hope that remained for me? Was acquittal useless? Was there +no period, past or in prospect, that could give relief to my sufferings? +Was the odious and atrocious falsehood that had been invented against +me, to follow me wherever I went, to strip me of character, to deprive +me of the sympathy and good-will of mankind, to wrest from me the very +bread by which life must be sustained? + +For the space perhaps of half an hour the agony I felt from this +termination to my tranquillity, and the expectation it excited of the +enmity which would follow me through every retreat, was such as to +bereave me of all consistent thinking, much more of the power of coming +to any resolution. As soon as this giddiness and horror of the mind +subsided, and the deadly calm that invaded my faculties was no more, one +stiff and master gale gained the ascendancy, and drove me to an instant +desertion of this late cherished retreat. I had no patience to enter +into further remonstrance and explanation with the inhabitants of my +present residence. I believed that it was in vain to hope to recover the +favourable prepossession and tranquillity I had lately enjoyed. In +encountering the prejudices that were thus armed against me, I should +have to deal with a variety of dispositions, and, though I might succeed +with some, I could not expect to succeed with all. I had seen too much +of the reign of triumphant falsehood, to have that sanguine confidence +in the effects of my innocence, which would have suggested itself to the +mind of any other person of my propensities and my age. The recent +instance which had occurred in my conversation with Laura might well +contribute to discourage me. I could not endure the thought of opposing +the venom that was thus scattered against me, in detail and through its +minuter particles. If ever it should be necessary to encounter it, if I +were pursued like a wild beast, till I could no longer avoid turning +upon my hunters, I would then turn upon the true author of this +unprincipled attack; I would encounter the calumny in its strong hold; I +would rouse myself to an exertion hitherto unessayed; and, by the +firmness, intrepidity, and unalterable constancy I should display, would +yet compel mankind to believe Mr. Falkland a suborner and a murderer! + + + + +CHAPTER XIV. + + +I hasten to the conclusion of my melancholy story. I began to write soon +after the period to which I have now conducted it. This was another +resource that my mind, ever eager in inventing means to escape from my +misery, suggested. In my haste to withdraw myself from the retreat in +Wales, where first the certainty of Mr. Falkland's menaces was confirmed +to me, I left behind me the apparatus of my etymological enquiries, and +the papers I had written upon the subject. I have never been able to +persuade myself to resume this pursuit. It is always discouraging, to +begin over again a laborious task, and exert one's self to recover a +position we had already occupied. I knew not how soon or how abruptly I +might be driven from any new situation; the appendages of the study in +which I had engaged were too cumbrous for this state of dependence and +uncertainty; they only served to give new sharpness to the enmity of my +foe, and new poignancy to my hourly-renewing distress. + +But what was of greatest importance, and made the deepest impression +upon my mind, was my separation from the family of Laura. Fool that I +was, to imagine that there was any room for me in the abodes of +friendship and tranquillity! It was now first, that I felt, with the +most intolerable acuteness, how completely I was cut off from the whole +human species. Other connections I had gained, comparatively without +interest; and I saw them dissolved without the consummation of agony. I +had never experienced the purest refinements of friendship, but in two +instances, that of Collins, and this of the family of Laura. Solitude, +separation, banishment! These are words often in the mouths of human +beings; but few men except myself have felt the full latitude of their +meaning. The pride of philosophy has taught us to treat man as an +individual. He is no such thing. He holds necessarily, indispensably, to +his species. He is like those twin-births, that have two heads indeed, +and four hands; but, if you attempt to detach them from each other, they +are inevitably subjected to miserable and lingering destruction. + +It was this circumstance, more than all the rest, that gradually gorged +my heart with abhorrence of Mr. Falkland. I could not think of his name +but with a sickness and a loathing that seemed more than human. It was +by his means that I suffered the loss of one consolation after another, +of every thing that was happiness, or that had the resemblance of +happiness. + +The writing of these memoirs served me as a source of avocation for +several years. For some time I had a melancholy satisfaction in it. I +was better pleased to retrace the particulars of calamities that had +formerly afflicted me, than to look forward, as at other times I was too +apt to do, to those by which I might hereafter be overtaken. I conceived +that my story, faithfully digested, would carry in it an impression of +truth that few men would be able to resist; or, at worst, that, by +leaving it behind me when I should no longer continue to exist, +posterity might be induced to do me justice; and, seeing in my example +what sort of evils are entailed upon mankind by society as it is at +present constituted, might be inclined to turn their attention upon the +fountain from which such bitter waters have been accustomed to flow. But +these motives have diminished in their influence. I have contracted a +disgust for life and all its appendages. Writing, which was at first a +pleasure, is changed into a burthen. I shall compress into a small +compass what remains to be told. + +I discovered, not long after the period of which I am speaking, the +precise cause of the reverse I had experienced in my residence in Wales, +and, included in that cause, what it was I had to look for in my future +adventures. Mr. Falkland had taken the infernal Gines into his pay, a +man critically qualified for the service in which he was now engaged, by +the unfeeling brutality of his temper, by his habits of mind at once +audacious and artful, and by the peculiar animosity and vengeance he had +conceived against me. The employment to which this man was hired, was +that of following me from place to place, blasting my reputation, and +preventing me from the chance, by continuing long in one residence, of +acquiring a character for integrity, that should give new weight to any +accusation I might at a future time be induced to prefer. He had come to +the seat of my residence with the bricklayers and labourers I have +mentioned; and, while he took care to keep out of sight so far as +related to me, was industrious in disseminating that which, in the eye +of the world, seemed to amount to a demonstration of the profligacy and +detestableness of my character. It was no doubt from him that the +detested scroll had been procured, which I had found in my habitation +immediately prior to my quitting it. In all this Mr. Falkland, reasoning +upon his principles, was only employing a necessary precaution. There +was something in the temper of his mind, that impressed him with +aversion to the idea of violently putting an end to my existence; at the +same time that unfortunately he could never deem himself sufficiently +secured against my recrimination, so long as I remained alive. As to the +fact of Gines being retained by him for this tremendous purpose, he by +no means desired that it should become generally known; but neither did +he look upon the possibility of its being known with terror. It was +already too notorious for his wishes, that I had advanced the most +odious charges against him. If he regarded me with abhorrence as the +adversary of his fame, those persons who had had occasion to be in any +degree acquainted with our history, did not entertain less abhorrence +against me for my own sake. If they should at any time know the pains he +exerted in causing my evil reputation to follow me, they would consider +it as an act of impartial justice, perhaps as a generous anxiety to +prevent other men from being imposed upon and injured, as he had been. + +What expedient was I to employ for the purpose of counteracting the +meditated and barbarous prudence, which was thus destined, in all +changes of scene, to deprive me of the benefits and consolations of +human society? There was one expedient against which I was absolutely +determined--disguise. I had experienced so many mortifications, and such +intolerable restraint, when I formerly had recourse to it; it was +associated in my memory with sensations of such acute anguish, that my +mind was thus far entirely convinced: life was not worth purchasing at +so high a price! But, though in this respect I was wholly resolved, +there was another point that did not appear so material, and in which +therefore I was willing to accommodate myself to circumstances. I was +contented, if that would insure my peace, to submit to the otherwise +unmanly expedient of passing by a different name. + +But the change of my name, the abruptness with which I removed from +place to place, the remoteness and the obscurity which I proposed to +myself in the choice of my abode, were all insufficient to elude the +sagacity of Gines, or the unrelenting constancy with which Mr. Falkland +incited my tormentor to pursue me. Whithersoever I removed myself it was +not long before I had occasion to perceive this detested adversary in my +rear. No words can enable me to do justice to the sensations which this +circumstance produced in me. It was like what has been described of the +eye of Omniscience, pursuing the guilty sinner, and darting a ray that +awakens him to new sensibility, at the very moment that, otherwise, +exhausted nature would lull him into a temporary oblivion of the +reproaches of his conscience. Sleep fled from my eyes. No walls could +hide me from the discernment of this hated foe. Every where his industry +was unwearied to create for me new distress. Rest I had none; relief I +had none: never could I count upon an instant's security; never could I +wrap myself in the shroud of oblivion. The minutes in which I did not +actually perceive him, were contaminated and blasted with the certain +expectation of his speedy interference. In my first retreat I had passed +a few weeks of delusive tranquillity, but never after was I happy enough +to attain to so much as that shadowy gratification. I spent some years +in this dreadful vicissitude of pain. My sensations at certain periods +amounted to insanity. + +I pursued in every succeeding instance the conduct I had adopted at +first. I determined never to enter into a contest of accusation and +defence with the execrable Gines. If I could have submitted to it in +other respects, what purpose would it answer? I should have but an +imperfect and mutilated story to tell. This story had succeeded with +persons already prepossessed in my favour by personal intercourse; but +could it succeed with strangers? It had succeeded so long as I was able +to hide myself from my pursuers; but could it succeed now, that this +appeared impracticable, and that they proceeded by arming against me a +whole vicinity at once? + +It is inconceivable the mischiefs that this kind of existence included. +Why should I insist upon such aggravations as hunger, beggary, and +external wretchedness? These were an inevitable consequence. It was by +the desertion of mankind that, in each successive instance, I was made +acquainted with my fate. Delay in such a moment served but to increase +the evil; and when I fled, meagreness and penury were the ordinary +attendants of my course. But this was a small consideration. Indignation +at one time, and unconquerable perseverance at another, sustained me, +where humanity, left to itself, would probably have sunk. + +It has already appeared that I was not of a temper to endure calamity, +without endeavouring, by every means I could devise, to elude and disarm +it. Recollecting, as I was habituated to do, the various projects by +which my situation could be meliorated, the question occurred to me, +"Why should I be harassed by the pursuits of this Gines? Why, man to +man, may I not, by the powers of my mind, attain the ascendancy over +him? At present he appears to be the persecutor, and I the persecuted: +is not this difference the mere creature of the imagination? May I not +employ my ingenuity to vex him with difficulties, and laugh at the +endless labour to which he will be condemned?" + +Alas, this is a speculation for a mind at ease! It is not the +persecution, but the catastrophe which is annexed to it, that makes the +difference between the tyrant and the sufferer! In mere corporal +exertion the hunter perhaps is upon a level with the miserable animal he +pursues! But could it be forgotten by either of us, that at every stage +Gines was to gratify his malignant passions, by disseminating charges of +the most infamous nature, and exciting against me the abhorrence of +every honest bosom, while I was to sustain the still-repeated +annihilation of my peace, my character, and my bread? Could I, by any +refinement of reason, convert this dreadful series into sport? I had no +philosophy that qualified me for so extraordinary an effort. If, under +other circumstances, I could even have entertained so strange an +imagination, I was restrained in the present instance by the necessity +of providing for myself the means of subsistence, and the fetters which, +through that necessity, the forms of human society imposed upon my +exertions. + +In one of those changes of residence, to which my miserable fate +repeatedly compelled me, I met, upon a road which I was obliged to +traverse, the friend of my youth, my earliest and best beloved friend, +the venerable Collins. It was one of those misfortunes which served to +accumulate my distress, that this man had quitted the island of Great +Britain only a very few weeks before that fatal reverse of fortune which +had ever since pursued me with unrelenting eagerness. Mr. Falkland, in +addition to the large estate he possessed in England, had a very +valuable plantation in the West Indies. This property had been greatly +mismanaged by the person who had the direction of it on the spot; and, +after various promises and evasions on his part, which, however they +might serve to beguile the patience of Mr. Falkland, had been attended +with no salutary fruits, it was resolved that Mr. Collins should go over +in person, to rectify the abuses which had so long prevailed. There had +even been some idea of his residing several years, if not settling +finally, upon the plantation. From that hour to the present I had never +received the smallest intelligence respecting him. + +I had always considered the circumstance of his critical absence as one +of my severest misfortunes. Mr. Collins had been one of the first +persons, even in the period of my infancy, to conceive hopes of me, as +of something above the common standard; and had contributed more than +any other to encourage and assist my juvenile studies. He had been the +executor of the little property of my father, who had fixed upon him for +that purpose in consideration of the mutual affection that existed +between us; and I seemed, on every account, to have more claim upon his +protection than upon that of any other human being. I had always +believed that, had he been present in the crisis of my fortune, he would +have felt a conviction of my innocence; and, convinced himself, would, +by means of the venerableness and energy of his character, have +interposed so effectually, as to have saved me the greater part of my +subsequent misfortunes. + +There was yet another idea in my mind relative to this subject, which +had more weight with me, than even the substantial exertions of +friendship I should have expected from him. The greatest aggravation of +my present lot was, that I was cut off from the friendship of mankind. I +can safely affirm, that poverty and hunger, that endless wanderings, +that a blasted character and the curses that clung to my name, were all +of them slight misfortunes compared to this. I endeavoured to sustain +myself by the sense of my integrity, but the voice of no man upon earth +echoed to the voice of my conscience. "I called aloud; but there was +none to answer; there was none that regarded." To me the whole world was +unhearing as the tempest, and as cold as the torpedo. Sympathy, the +magnetic virtue, the hidden essence of our life, was extinct. Nor was +this the sum of my misery. This food, so essential to an intelligent +existence, seemed perpetually renewing before me in its fairest colours, +only the more effectually to elude my grasp, and to mock my hunger. From +time to time I was prompted to unfold the affections of my soul, only to +be repelled with the greater anguish, and to be baffled in a way the +most intolerably mortifying. + +No sight therefore could give me a purer delight than that which now +presented itself to my eyes. It was some time however, before either of +us recognised the person of the other. Ten years had elapsed since our +last interview. Mr. Collins looked much older than he had done at that +period; in addition to which, he was, in his present appearance, pale, +sickly, and thin. These unfavourable effects had been produced by the +change of climate, particularly trying to persons in an advanced period +of life. Add to which, I supposed him to be at that moment in the West +Indies. I was probably as much altered in the period that had elapsed as +he had been. I was the first to recollect him. He was on horseback; I on +foot. I had suffered him to pass me. In a moment the full idea of who he +was rushed upon my mind; I ran; I called with an impetuous voice; I was +unable to restrain the vehemence of my emotions. + +The ardour of my feelings disguised my usual tone of speaking, which +otherwise Mr. Collins would infallibly have recognised. His sight was +already dim; he pulled up his horse till I should overtake him; and then +said, "Who are you? I do not know you." + +"My father!" exclaimed I, embracing one of his knees with fervour and +delight, "I am your son; once your little Caleb, whom you a thousand +times loaded with your kindness!" + +The unexpected repetition of my name gave a kind of shuddering emotion +to my friend, which was however checked by his age, and the calm and +benevolent philosophy that formed one of his most conspicuous habits. + +"I did not expect to see you!" replied he: "I did not wish it!" + +"My best, my oldest friend!" answered I, respect blending itself with my +impatience, "do not say so! I have not a friend any where in the whole +world but you! In you at least let me find sympathy and reciprocal +affection! If you knew how anxiously I have thought of you during the +whole period of your absence, you would not thus grievously disappoint +me in your return!" + +"How is it," said Mr. Collins, gravely, "that you have been reduced to +this forlorn condition? Was it not the inevitable consequence of your +own actions?" + +"The actions of others, not mine! Does not your heart tell you that I am +innocent?" + +"No. My observation of your early character taught me that you would be +extraordinary; but, unhappily, all extraordinary men are not good men: +that seems to be a lottery, dependent on circumstances apparently the +most trivial." + +"Will you hear my justification? I am as sure as I am of my existence, +that I can convince you of my purity." + +"Certainly, if you require it, I will hear you. But that must not be +just now. I could have been glad to decline it wholly. At my age I am +not fit for the storm; and I am not so sanguine as you in my expectation +of the result. Of what would you convince me? That Mr. Falkland is a +suborner and murderer?" + +I made no answer. My silence was an affirmative to the question. + +"And what benefit will result from this conviction? I have known you a +promising boy, whose character might turn to one side or the other as +events should decide. I have known Mr. Falkland in his maturer years, +and have always admired him, as the living model of liberality and +goodness. If you could change all my ideas, and show me that there was +no criterion by which vice might be prevented from being mistaken for +virtue, what benefit would arise from that? I must part with all my +interior consolation, and all my external connections. And for what? +What is it you propose? The death of Mr. Falkland by the hands of the +hangman." + +"No; I will not hurt a hair of his head, unless compelled to it by a +principle of defence. But surely you owe me justice?" + +"What justice? The justice of proclaiming your innocence? You know what +consequences are annexed to that. But I do not believe I shall find you +innocent. If you even succeed in perplexing my understanding, you will +not succeed in enlightening it. Such is the state of mankind, that +innocence, when involved in circumstances of suspicion, can scarcely +ever make out a demonstration of its purity; and guilt can often make us +feel an insurmountable reluctance to the pronouncing it guilt. +Meanwhile, for the purchase of this uncertainty, I must sacrifice all +the remaining comforts of my life. I believe Mr. Falkland to be +virtuous; but I know him to be prejudiced. He would never forgive me +even this accidental parley, if by any means he should come to be +acquainted with it." + +"Oh, argue not the consequences that are possible to result!" answered +I, impatiently, "I have a right to your kindness; I have a right to your +assistance!" + +"You have them. You have them to a certain degree; and it is not likely +that, by any process of examination, you can have them entire. You know +my habits of thinking. I regard you as vicious; but I do not consider +the vicious as proper objects of indignation and scorn. I consider you +as a machine; you are not constituted, I am afraid, to be greatly useful +to your fellow men: but you did not make yourself; you are just what +circumstances irresistibly compelled you to be. I am sorry for your ill +properties; but I entertain no enmity against you, nothing but +benevolence. Considering you in the light in which I at present consider +you, I am ready to contribute every thing in my power to your real +advantage, and would gladly assist you, if I knew how, in detecting and +extirpating the errors that have misled you. You have disappointed me, +but I have no reproaches to utter: it is more necessary for me to feel +compassion for you, than that I should accumulate your misfortune by my +censures." + +What could I say to such a man as this? Amiable, incomparable man! Never +was my mind more painfully divided than at that moment. The more he +excited my admiration, the more imperiously did my heart command me, +whatever were the price it should cost, to extort his friendship. I was +persuaded that severe duty required of him, that he should reject all +personal considerations, that he should proceed resolutely to the +investigation of the truth, and that, if he found the result terminating +in my favour, he should resign all his advantages, and, deserted as I +was by the world, make a common cause, and endeavour to compensate the +general injustice. But was it for me to force this conduct upon him, if, +now in his declining years, his own fortitude shrank from it? Alas, +neither he nor I foresaw the dreadful catastrophe that was so closely +impending! Otherwise, I am well assured that no tenderness for his +remaining tranquillity would have withheld him from a compliance with my +wishes! On the other hand, could I pretend to know what evils might +result to him from his declaring himself my advocate? Might not his +integrity be browbeaten and defeated, as mine had been? Did the +imbecility of his grey hairs afford no advantage to my terrible +adversary in the contest? Might not Mr. Falkland reduce him to a +condition as wretched and low as mine? After all, was it not vice in me +to desire to involve another man in my sufferings? If I regarded them as +intolerable, this was still an additional reason why I should bear them +alone. + +Influenced by these considerations, I assented to his views. I assented +to be thought hardly of by the man in the world whose esteem I most +ardently desired, rather than involve him in possible calamity. I +assented to the resigning what appeared to me at that moment as the last +practicable comfort of my life; a comfort, upon the thought of which, +while I surrendered it, my mind dwelt with undescribable longings. Mr. +Collins was deeply affected with the apparent ingenuousness with which I +expressed my feelings. The secret struggle of his mind was, "Can this be +hypocrisy? The individual with whom I am conferring, if virtuous, is one +of the most disinterestedly virtuous persons in the world." We tore +ourselves from each other. Mr. Collins promised, as far as he was able, +to have an eye upon my vicissitudes, and to assist me, in every respect +that was consistent with a just recollection of consequences. Thus I +parted as it were with the last expiring hope of my mind; and +voluntarily consented, thus maimed and forlorn, to encounter all the +evils that were yet in store for me. + +This is the latest event which at present I think it necessary to +record. I shall doubtless hereafter have further occasion to take up the +pen. Great and unprecedented as my sufferings have been, I feel +intimately persuaded that there are worse sufferings that await me. What +mysterious cause is it that enables me to write this, and not to perish +under the horrible apprehension! + + + + +CHAPTER XV. + + +It is as I foreboded. The presage with which I was visited was +prophetic. I am now to record a new and terrible revolution of my +fortune and my mind. + +Having made experiment of various situations with one uniform result, I +at length determined to remove myself, if possible, from the reach of my +persecutor, by going into voluntary banishment from my native soil. This +was my last resource for tranquillity, for honest fame, for those +privileges to which human life is indebted for the whole of its value. +"In some distant climate," said I, "surely I may find that security +which is necessary to persevering pursuit; surely I may lift my head +erect, associate with men upon the footing of a man, acquire +connections, and preserve them!" It is inconceivable with what ardent +Teachings of the soul I aspired to this termination. + +This last consolation was denied me by the inexorable Falkland. + +At the time the project was formed I was at no great distance from the +east coast of the island, and I resolved to take ship at Harwich, and +pass immediately into Holland. I accordingly repaired to that place, and +went, almost as soon as I arrived, to the port. But there was no vessel +perfectly ready to sail. I left the port, and withdrew to an inn, where, +after some time, I retired to a chamber. I was scarcely there before the +door of the room was opened, and the man whose countenance was the most +hateful to my eyes, Gines, entered the apartment. He shut the door as +soon as he entered. + +"Youngster," said he, "I have a little private intelligence to +communicate to you. I come as a friend, and that I may save you a +labour-in-vain trouble. If you consider what I have to say in that +light, it will be the better for you. It is my business now, do you see, +for want of a better, to see that you do not break out of bounds. Not +that I much matter having one man for my employer, or dancing attendance +after another's heels; but I have special kindness for you, for some +good turns that you wot of, and therefore I do not stand upon +ceremonies! You have led me a very pretty round already; and, out of the +love I bear you, you shall lead me as much further, if you will. But +beware the salt seas! They are out of my orders. You are a prisoner at +present, and I believe all your life will remain so. Thanks to the +milk-and-water softness of your former master! If I had the ordering of +these things, it should go with you in another fashion. As long as you +think proper, you are a prisoner within the rules; and the rules with +which the soft-hearted squire indulges you, are all England, Scotland, +and Wales. But you are not to go out of these climates. The squire is +determined you shall never pass the reach of his disposal. He has +therefore given orders that, whenever you attempt so to do, you shall be +converted from a prisoner at large to a prisoner in good earnest. A +friend of mine followed you just now to the harbour; I was within call; +and, if there had been any appearance of your setting your foot from +land, we should have been with you in a trice, and laid you fast by the +heels. I would advise you, for the future, to keep at a proper distance +from the sea, for fear of the worst. You see I tell you all this for +your good. For my part, I should be better satisfied if you were in +limbo, with a rope about your neck, and a comfortable bird's eye +prospect to the gallows: but I do as I am directed; and so good night to +you!" + +The intelligence thus conveyed to me occasioned an instantaneous +revolution in both my intellectual and animal system. I disdained to +answer, or take the smallest notice of the fiend by whom it was +delivered. It is now three days since I received it, and from that +moment to the present my blood has been in a perpetual ferment. My +thoughts wander from one idea of horror to another, with incredible +rapidity. I have had no sleep. I have scarcely remained in one posture +for a minute together. It has been with the utmost difficulty that I +have been able to command myself far enough to add a few pages to my +story. But, uncertain as I am of the events of each succeeding hour, I +determined to force myself to the performance of this task. All is not +right within me. How it will terminate, God knows. I sometimes fear that +I shall be wholly deserted of my reason. + +What--dark, mysterious, unfeeling, unrelenting tyrant!--is it come to +this? When Nero and Caligula swayed the Roman sceptre, it was a fearful +thing to offend these bloody rulers. The empire had already spread +itself from climate to climate, and from sea to sea. If their unhappy +victim fled to the rising of the sun, where the luminary of day seems to +us first to ascend from the waves of the ocean, the power of the tyrant +was still behind him. If he withdrew to the west, to Hesperian darkness, +and the shores of barbarian Thule, still he was not safe from his +gore-drenched foe.--Falkland! art thou the offspring, in whom the +lineaments of these tyrants are faithfully preserved? Was the world, +with all its climates, made in vain for thy helpless unoffending victim? + +Tremble! + +Tyrants have trembled, surrounded with whole armies of their +Janissaries! What should make thee inaccessible to my fury? No, I will +use no daggers! I will unfold a tale!--I will show thee to the world for +what thou art; and all the men that live, shall confess my truth!--Didst +thou imagine that I was altogether passive, a mere worm, organised to +feel sensations of pain, but no emotion of resentment? Didst thou +imagine that there was no danger in inflicting on me pains however +great, miseries however dreadful? Didst thou believe me impotent, +imbecile, and idiot-like, with no understanding to contrive thy ruin, +and no energy to perpetrate it? + +I will tell a tale--! The justice of the country shall hear me! The +elements of nature in universal uproar shall not interrupt me! I will +speak with a voice more fearful than thunder!--Why should I be supposed +to speak from any dishonourable motive? I am under no prosecution now! I +shall not now appear to be endeavouring to remove a criminal indictment +from myself, by throwing it back on its author!--Shall I regret the ruin +that will overwhelm thee? Too long have I been tender-hearted and +forbearing! What benefit has ever resulted from my mistaken clemency? +There is no evil thou hast scrupled to accumulate upon me! Neither will +I be more scrupulous! Thou hast shown no mercy; and thou shalt receive +none!--I must be calm! bold as a lion, yet collected! + +This is a moment pregnant with fate. I know--I think I know--that I will +be triumphant, and crush my seemingly omnipotent foe. But, should it be +otherwise, at least he shall not be every way successful. His fame shall +not be immortal as he thinks. These papers shall preserve the truth; +they shall one day be published, and then the world shall do justice on +us both. Recollecting that, I shall not die wholly without consolation. +It is not to be endured that falsehood and tyranny should reign for +ever. + +How impotent are the precautions of man against the eternally existing +laws of the intellectual world! This Falkland has invented against me +every species of foul accusation. He has hunted me from city to city. +He has drawn his lines of circumvallation round me that I may not +escape. He has kept his scenters of human prey for ever at my heels. He +may hunt me out of the world.--In vain! With this engine, this little +pen, I defeat all his machinations; I stab him in the very point he was +most solicitous to defend! + +Collins! I now address myself to you. I have consented that you should +yield me no assistance in my present terrible situation. I am content to +die rather than do any thing injurious to your tranquillity. But +remember, you are my father still! I conjure you, by all the love you +ever bore me, by the benefits you have conferred on me, by the +forbearance and kindness towards you that now penetrates my soul, by my +innocence--for, if these be the last words I shall ever write, I die +protesting my innocence!--by all these, or whatever tie more sacred has +influence on your soul, I conjure you, listen to my last request! +Preserve these papers from destruction, and preserve them from Falkland! +It is all I ask! I have taken care to provide a safe mode of conveying +them into your possession: and I have a firm confidence, which I will +not suffer to depart from me, that they will one day find their way to +the public! + +The pen lingers in my trembling fingers! Is there any thing I have left +unsaid?--The contents of the fatal trunk, from which all my misfortunes +originated, I have never been able to ascertain. I once thought it +contained some murderous instrument or relic connected with the fate of +the unhappy Tyrrel. I am now persuaded that the secret it encloses, is a +faithful narrative of that and its concomitant transactions, written by +Mr. Falkland, and reserved in case of the worst, that, if by any +unforeseen event his guilt should come to be fully disclosed, it might +contribute to redeem the wreck of his reputation. But the truth or the +falsehood of this conjecture is of little moment. If Falkland shall +never be detected to the satisfaction of the world, such a narrative +will probably never see the light. In that case this story of mine may +amply, severely perhaps, supply its place. + +I know not what it is that renders me thus solemn. I have a secret +foreboding, as if I should never again be master of myself. If I succeed +in what I now meditate respecting Falkland, my precaution in the +disposal of these papers will have been unnecessary; I shall no longer +be reduced to artifice and evasion. If I fail, the precaution will +appear to have been wisely chosen. + + * * * * * + + + + +POSTSCRIPT. + + +All is over. I have carried into execution my meditated attempt. My +situation is totally changed; I now sit down to give an account of it. +For several weeks after the completion of this dreadful business, my +mind was in too tumultuous a state to permit me to write. I think I +shall now be able to arrange my thoughts sufficiently for that purpose. +Great God! how wondrous, how terrible are the events that have +intervened since I was last employed in a similar manner! It is no +wonder that my thoughts were solemn, and my mind filled with horrible +forebodings! + +Having formed my resolution, I set out from Harwich, for the +metropolitan town of the county in which Mr. Falkland resided. Gines, I +well knew, was in my rear. That was of no consequence to me. He might +wonder at the direction I pursued, but he could not tell with what +purpose I pursued it. My design was a secret, carefully locked up in my +own breast. It was not without a sentiment of terror that I entered a +town which had been the scene of my long imprisonment. I proceeded to +the house of the chief magistrate the instant I arrived, that I might +give no time to my adversary to counterwork my proceeding. + +I told him who I was, and that I was come from a distant part of the +kingdom, for the purpose of rendering him the medium of a charge of +murder against my former patron. My name was already familiar to him. He +answered, that he could not take cognizance of my deposition; that I was +an object of universal execration in that part of the world; and he was +determined upon no account to be the vehicle of my depravity. + +I warned him to consider well what he was doing. I called upon him for +no favour; I only applied to him in the regular exercise of his +function. Would he take upon him to say that he had a right, at his +pleasure, to suppress a charge of this complicated nature? I had to +accuse Mr. Falkland of repeated murders. The perpetrator knew that I was +in possession of the truth upon the subject; and, knowing that, I went +perpetually in danger of my life from his malice and revenge. I was +resolved to go through with the business, if justice were to be obtained +from any court in England. Upon what pretence did he refuse my +deposition? I was in every respect a competent witness. I was of age to +understand the nature of an oath; I was in my perfect senses; I was +untarnished by the verdict of any jury, or the sentence of any judge. +His private opinion of my character could not alter the law of the land. +I demanded to be confronted with Mr. Falkland, and I was well assured I +should substantiate the charge to the satisfaction of the whole world. +If he did not think proper to apprehend him upon my single testimony, I +should be satisfied if he only sent him notice of the charge, and +summoned him to appear. + +The magistrate, finding me thus resolute, thought proper a little to +lower his tone. He no longer absolutely refused to comply with my +requisition, but condescended to expostulate with me. He represented to +me Mr. Falkland's health, which had for some years been exceedingly +indifferent; his having been once already brought to the most solemn +examination upon this charge; the diabolical malice in which alone my +proceeding must have originated; and the ten-fold ruin it would bring +down upon my head. To all these representations my answer was short. "I +was determined to go on, and would abide the consequences." A summons +was at length granted, and notice sent to Mr. Falkland of the charge +preferred against him. + +Three days elapsed before any further step could be taken in this +business. This interval in no degree contributed to tranquillise my +mind. The thought of preferring a capital accusation against, and +hastening the death of, such a man as Mr. Falkland, was by no means an +opiate to reflection. At one time I commended the action, either as just +revenge (for the benevolence of my nature was in a great degree turned +to gall), or as necessary self-defence, or as that which, in an +impartial and philanthropical estimate, included the smallest evil. At +another time I was haunted with doubts. But, in spite of these +variations of sentiment, I uniformly determined to persist! I felt as if +impelled by a tide of unconquerable impulse. The consequences were such +as might well appal the stoutest heart. Either the ignominious execution +of a man whom I had once so deeply venerated, and whom now I sometimes +suspected not to be without his claims to veneration; or a confirmation, +perhaps an increase, of the calamities I had so long endured. Yet these +I preferred to a state of uncertainty. I desired to know the worst; to +put an end to the hope, however faint, which had been so long my +torment; and, above all, to exhaust and finish the catalogue of +expedients that were at my disposition. My mind was worked up to a state +little short of frenzy. My body was in a burning fever with the +agitation of my thoughts. When I laid my hand upon my bosom or my head, +it seemed to scorch them with the fervency of its heat. I could not sit +still for a moment. I panted with incessant desire that the dreadful +crisis I had so eagerly invoked, were come, and were over. + +After an interval of three days, I met Mr. Falkland in the presence of +the magistrate to whom I had applied upon the subject. I had only two +hours' notice to prepare myself; Mr. Falkland seeming as eager as I to +have the question brought to a crisis, and laid at rest for ever. I had +an opportunity, before the examination, to learn that Mr. Forester was +drawn by some business on an excursion on the continent; and that +Collins, whose health when I saw him was in a very precarious state, was +at this time confined with an alarming illness. His constitution had +been wholly broken by his West Indian expedition. The audience I met at +the house of the magistrate consisted of several gentlemen and others +selected for the purpose; the plan being, in some respects, as in the +former instance, to find a medium between the suspicious air of a +private examination, and the indelicacy, as it was styled, of an +examination exposed to the remark of every casual spectator. + +I can conceive of no shock greater than that I received from the sight +of Mr. Falkland. His appearance on the last occasion on which we met +had been haggard, ghost-like, and wild, energy in his gestures, and +frenzy in his aspect. It was now the appearance of a corpse. He was +brought in in a chair, unable to stand, fatigued and almost destroyed by +the journey he had just taken. His visage was colourless; his limbs +destitute of motion, almost of life. His head reclined upon his bosom, +except that now and then he lifted it up, and opened his eyes with a +languid glance; immediately after which he sunk back into his former +apparent insensibility. He seemed not to have three hours to live. He +had kept his chamber for several weeks; but the summons of the +magistrate had been delivered to him at his bed-side, his orders +respecting letters and written papers being so peremptory that no one +dared to disobey them. Upon reading the paper he was seized with a very +dangerous fit; but, as soon as he recovered, he insisted upon being +conveyed, with all practicable expedition, to the place of appointment. +Falkland, in the most helpless state, was still Falkland, firm in +command, and capable to extort obedience from every one that approached +him. + +What a sight was this to me! Till the moment that Falkland was presented +to my view, my breast was steeled to pity. I thought that I had coolly +entered into the reason of the case (passion, in a state of solemn and +omnipotent vehemence, always appears to be coolness to him in whom it +domineers), and that I had determined impartially and justly. I believed +that, if Mr. Falkland were permitted to persist in his schemes, we must +both of us be completely wretched. I believed that it was in my power, +by the resolution I had formed, to throw my share of this wretchedness +from me, and that his could scarcely be increased. It appeared therefore +to my mind, to be a mere piece of equity and justice, such as an +impartial spectator would desire, that one person should be miserable in +preference to two; that one person rather than two should be +incapacitated from acting his part, and contributing his share to the +general welfare. I thought that in this business I had risen superior to +personal considerations, and judged with a total neglect of the +suggestions of self-regard. It is true, Mr. Falkland was mortal, but, +notwithstanding his apparent decay, he might live long. Ought I to +submit to waste the best years of my life in my present wretched +situation? He had declared that his reputation should be for ever +inviolate; this was his ruling passion, the thought that worked his soul +to madness. He would probably therefore leave a legacy of persecution to +be received by me from the hands of Gines, or some other villain equally +atrocious, when he should himself be no more. Now or never was the time +for me to redeem my future life from endless woe. + +But all these fine-spun reasonings vanished before the object that was +now presented to me. "Shall I trample upon a man thus dreadfully +reduced? Shall I point my animosity against one, whom the system of +nature has brought down to the grave? Shall I poison, with sounds the +most intolerable to his ears, the last moments of a man like Falkland? +It is impossible. There must have been some dreadful mistake in the +train of argument that persuaded me to be the author of this hateful +scene. There must have been a better and more magnanimous remedy to the +evils under which I groaned." + +It was too late: the mistake I had committed was now gone past all power +of recall. Here was Falkland, solemnly brought before a magistrate to +answer to a charge of murder. Here I stood, having already declared +myself the author of the charge, gravely and sacredly pledged to support +it. This was my situation; and, thus situated, I was called upon +immediately to act. My whole frame shook. I would eagerly have consented +that that moment should have been the last of my existence. I however +believed, that the conduct now most indispensably incumbent on me was to +lay the emotions of my soul naked before my hearers. I looked first at +Mr. Falkland, and then at the magistrate and attendants, and then at Mr. +Falkland again. My voice was suffocated with agony. I began:-- + +"Why cannot I recall the last four days of my life? How was it possible +for me to be so eager, so obstinate, in a purpose so diabolical? Oh, +that I had listened to the expostulations of the magistrate that hears +me, or submitted to the well-meant despotism of his authority! Hitherto +I have been only miserable; henceforth I shall account myself base! +Hitherto, though hardly treated by mankind, I stood acquitted at the bar +of my own conscience. I had not filled up the measure of my +wretchedness! + +"Would to God it were possible for me to retire from this scene without +uttering another word! I would brave the consequences--I would submit to +any imputation of cowardice, falsehood, and profligacy, rather than add +to the weight of misfortune with which Mr. Falkland is overwhelmed. But +the situation, and the demands of Mr. Falkland himself, forbid me. He, +in compassion for whose fallen state I would willingly forget every +interest of my own, would compel me to accuse, that he might enter upon +his justification. I will confess every sentiment of my heart. + +"No penitence, no anguish, can expiate the folly and the cruelty of this +last act I have perpetrated. But Mr. Falkland well knows--I affirm it in +his presence--how unwillingly I have proceeded to this extremity. I +have reverenced him; he was worthy of reverence: I have loved him; he +was endowed with qualities that partook of divine. + +"From the first moment I saw him, I conceived the most ardent +admiration. He condescended to encourage me; I attached myself to him +with the fulness of my affection. He was unhappy; I exerted myself with +youthful curiosity to discover the secret of his woe. This was the +beginning of misfortune. + +"What shall I say?--He was indeed the murderer of Tyrrel; he suffered +the Hawkinses to be executed, knowing that they were innocent, and that +he alone was guilty. After successive surmises, after various +indiscretions on my part, and indications on his, he at length confided +to me at full the fatal tale! + +"Mr. Falkland! I most solemnly conjure you to recollect yourself! Did I +ever prove myself unworthy of your confidence? The secret was a most +painful burthen to me; it was the extremest folly that led me +unthinkingly to gain possession of it; but I would have died a thousand +deaths rather than betray it. It was the jealousy of your own thoughts, +and the weight that hung upon your mind, that led you to watch my +motions, and to conceive alarm from every particle of my conduct. + +"You began in confidence; why did you not continue in confidence? The +evil that resulted from my original imprudence would then have been +comparatively little. You threatened me: did I then betray you? A word +from my lips at that time would have freed me from your threats for +ever. I bore them for a considerable period, and at last quitted your +service, and threw myself a fugitive upon the world, in silence. Why did +you not suffer me to depart? You brought me back by stratagem and +violence, and wantonly accused me of an enormous felony! Did I then +mention a syllable of the murder, the secret of which was in my +possession? + +"Where is the man that has suffered more from the injustice of society +than I have done? I was accused of a villainy that my heart abhorred. I +was sent to jail. I will not enumerate the horrors of my prison, the +lightest of which would make the heart of humanity shudder. I looked +forward to the gallows! Young, ambitious, fond of life, innocent as the +child unborn, I looked forward to the gallows! I believed that one word +of resolute accusation against my patron would deliver me; yet I was +silent, I armed myself with patience, uncertain whether it were better +to accuse or to die. Did this show me a man unworthy to be trusted? + +"I determined to break out of prison. With infinite difficulty, and +repeated miscarriages, I at length effected my purpose. Instantly a +proclamation, with a hundred guineas reward, was issued for apprehending +me. I was obliged to take shelter among the refuse of mankind, in the +midst of a gang of thieves. I encountered the most imminent peril of my +life when I entered this retreat, and when I quitted it. Immediately +after, I travelled almost the whole length of the kingdom, in poverty +and distress, in hourly danger of being retaken and manacled like a +felon. I would have fled my country; I was prevented. I had recourse to +various disguises; I was innocent, and yet was compelled to as many arts +and subterfuges as could have been entailed on the worst of villains. In +London I was as much harassed and as repeatedly alarmed as I had been in +my flight through the country. Did all these persecutions persuade me to +put an end to my silence? No: I suffered them with patience and +submission; I did not make one attempt to retort them upon their author. + +"I fell at last into the hands of the miscreants that are nourished with +human blood. In this terrible situation I, for the first time, +attempted, by turning informer, to throw the weight from myself. Happily +for me, the London magistrate listened to my tale with insolent +contempt. + +"I soon, and long, repented of my rashness, and rejoiced in my +miscarriage. + +"I acknowledge that, in various ways, Mr. Falkland showed humanity +towards me during this period. He would have prevented my going to +prison at first; he contributed towards my subsistence during my +detention; he had no share in the pursuit that had been set on foot +against me; he at length procured my discharge, when brought forward for +trial. But a great part of his forbearance was unknown to me; I supposed +him to be my unrelenting pursuer. I could not forget that, whoever +heaped calamities on me in the sequel, they all originated in his forged +accusation. + +"The prosecution against me for felony was now at an end. Why were not +my sufferings permitted to terminate then, and I allowed to hide my +weary head in some obscure yet tranquil retreat? Had I not sufficiently +proved my constancy and fidelity? Would not a compromise in this +situation have been most wise and most secure? But the restless and +jealous anxiety of Mr. Falkland would not permit him to repose the least +atom of confidence. The only compromise that he proposed was that, with +my own hand, I should sign myself a villain. I refused this proposal, +and have ever since been driven from place to place, deprived of peace, +of honest fame, even of bread. For a long time I persisted in the +resolution that no emergency should convert me into the assailant. In an +evil hour I at last listened to my resentment and impatience, and the +hateful mistake into which I fell has produced the present scene. + +"I now see that mistake in all its enormity. I am sure that if I had +opened my heart to Mr. Falkland, if I had told to him privately the tale +that I have now been telling, he could not have resisted my reasonable +demand. After all his precautions, he must ultimately have depended upon +my forbearance. Could he be sure that, if I were at last worked up to +disclose every thing I knew, and to enforce it with all the energy I +could exert, I should obtain no credit? If he must in every case be at +my mercy, in which mode ought he to have sought his safety, in +conciliation, or in inexorable cruelty? + +"Mr. Falkland is of a noble nature. Yes; in spite of the catastrophe of +Tyrrel, of the miserable end of the Hawkinses, and of all that I have +myself suffered, I affirm that he has qualities of the most admirable +kind. It is therefore impossible that he could have resisted a frank and +fervent expostulation, the frankness and the fervour in which the whole +soul is poured out. I despaired, while it was yet time to have made the +just experiment; but my despair was criminal, was treason against the +sovereignty of truth. + +"I have told a plain and unadulterated tale. I came hither to curse, but +I remain to bless. I came to accuse, but am compelled to applaud. I +proclaim to all the world, that Mr. Falkland is a man worthy of +affection and kindness, and that I am myself the basest and most odious +of mankind! Never will I forgive myself the iniquity of this day. The +memory will always haunt me, and embitter every hour of my existence. +In thus acting I have been a murderer--a cool, deliberate, unfeeling +murderer.--I have said what my accursed precipitation has obliged me to +say. Do with me as you please! I ask no favour. Death would be a +kindness, compared to what I feel!" + +Such were the accents dictated by my remorse. I poured them out with +uncontrollable impetuosity; for my heart was pierced, and I was +compelled to give vent to its anguish. Every one that heard me, was +petrified with astonishment. Every one that heard me, was melted into +tears. They could not resist the ardour with which I praised the great +qualities of Falkland; they manifested their sympathy in the tokens of +my penitence. + +How shall I describe the feelings of this unfortunate man? Before I +began, he seemed sunk and debilitated, incapable of any strenuous +impression. When I mentioned the murder, I could perceive in him an +involuntary shuddering, though it was counteracted partly by the +feebleness of his frame, and partly by the energy of his mind. This was +an allegation he expected, and he had endeavoured to prepare himself for +it. But there was much of what I said, of which he had had no previous +conception. When I expressed the anguish of my mind, he seemed at first +startled and alarmed, lest this should be a new expedient to gain credit +to my tale. His indignation against me was great for having retained all +my resentment towards him, thus, as it might be, to the last hour of his +existence. It was increased when he discovered me, as he supposed, using +a pretence of liberality and sentiment to give new edge to my hostility. +But as I went on he could no longer resist. He saw my sincerity; he was +penetrated with my grief and compunction. He rose from his seat, +supported by the attendants, and--to my infinite astonishment--threw +himself into my arms! + +"Williams," said he, "you have conquered! I see too late the greatness +and elevation of your mind. I confess that it is to my fault and not +yours, that it is to the excess of jealousy that was ever burning in my +bosom, that I owe my ruin. I could have resisted any plan of malicious +accusation you might have brought against me. But I see that the artless +and manly story you have told, has carried conviction to every hearer. +All my prospects are concluded. All that I most ardently desired, is for +ever frustrated. I have spent a life of the basest cruelty, to cover one +act of momentary vice, and to protect myself against the prejudices of +my species. I stand now completely detected. My name will be consecrated +to infamy, while your heroism, your patience, and your virtues will be +for ever admired. You have inflicted on me the most fatal of all +mischiefs; but I bless the hand that wounds me. And now,"--turning to +the magistrate--"and now, do with me as you please. I am prepared to +suffer all the vengeance of the law. You cannot inflict on me more than +I deserve. You cannot hate me, more than I hate myself. I am the most +execrable of all villains. I have for many years (I know not how long) +dragged on a miserable existence in insupportable pain. I am at last, in +recompense for all my labours and my crimes, dismissed from it with the +disappointment of my only remaining hope, the destruction of that for +the sake of which alone I consented to exist. It was worthy of such a +life, that it should continue just long enough to witness this final +overthrow. If however you wish to punish me, you must be speedy in your +justice; for, as reputation was the blood that warmed my heart, so I +feel that death and infamy must seize me together." + +I record the praises bestowed on me by Falkland, not because I deserved +them, but because they serve to aggravate the baseness of my cruelty. He +survived this dreadful scene but three days. I have been his murderer. +It was fit that he should praise my patience, who has fallen a victim, +life and fame, to my precipitation! It would have been merciful in +comparison, if I had planted a dagger in his heart. He would have +thanked me for my kindness. But, atrocious, execrable wretch that I have +been! I wantonly inflicted on him an anguish a thousand times worse than +death. Meanwhile I endure the penalty of my crime. His figure is ever in +imagination before me. Waking or sleeping, I still behold him. He seems +mildly to expostulate with me for my unfeeling behaviour. I live the +devoted victim of conscious reproach. Alas! I am the same Caleb Williams +that, so short a time ago, boasted that, however great were the +calamities I endured, I was still innocent. + +Such has been the result of a project I formed, for delivering myself +from the evil that had so long attended me. I thought that, if Falkland +were dead, I should return once again to all that makes life worth +possessing. I thought that, if the guilt of Falkland were established, +fortune and the world would smile upon my efforts. Both these events are +accomplished; and it is now only that I am truly miserable. + +Why should my reflections perpetually centre upon myself?--self, an +overweening regard to which has been the source of my errors! Falkland, +I will think only of thee, and from that thought will draw ever-fresh +nourishment for my sorrows! One generous, one disinterested tear I will +consecrate to thy ashes! A nobler spirit lived not among the sons of +men. Thy intellectual powers were truly sublime, and thy bosom burned +with a god-like ambition. But of what use are talents and sentiments in +the corrupt wilderness of human society? It is a rank and rotten soil, +from which every finer shrub draws poison as it grows. All that, in a +happier field and a purer air, would expand into virtue and germinate +into usefulness, is thus concerted into henbane and deadly nightshade. + +Falkland! thou enteredst upon thy career with the purest and most +laudable intentions. But thou imbibedst the poison of chivalry with thy +earliest youth; and the base and low-minded envy that met thee on thy +return to thy native seats, operated with this poison to hurry thee into +madness. Soon, too soon, by this fatal coincidence, were the blooming +hopes of thy youth blasted for ever. From that moment thou only +continuedst to live to the phantom of departed honour. From that moment +thy benevolence was, in a great part, turned into rankling jealousy and +inexorable precaution. Year after year didst thou spend in this +miserable project of imposture; and only at last continuedst to live, +long enough to see, by my misjudging and abhorred intervention, thy +closing hope disappointed, and thy death accompanied with the foulest +disgrace! + +I began these memoirs with the idea of vindicating my character. I have +now no character that I wish to vindicate: but I will finish them that +thy story may be fully understood; and that, if those errors of thy life +be known which thou so ardently desiredst to conceal, the world may at +least not hear and repeat a half-told and mangled tale. + + + +THE END. + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Caleb Williams, by William Godwin + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CALEB WILLIAMS *** + +***** This file should be named 11323.txt or 11323.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/1/1/3/2/11323/ + +Produced by Jon Ingram, and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team. + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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