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+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Concerning Animals and Other Matters
+by E.H. Aitken, (AKA Edward Hamilton)
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Concerning Animals and Other Matters
+
+Author: E.H. Aitken, (AKA Edward Hamilton)
+
+Release Date: February 6, 2004 [EBook #10962]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONCERNING ANIMALS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Garrett Alley and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team
+
+
+
+
+[Illustration: Portrait of "EHA."]
+
+CONCERNING ANIMALS AND OTHER MATTERS
+
+BY E.H. AITKEN ("EHA")
+
+AUTHOR OF "FIVE WINDOWS OF THE SOUL," "TRIBES ON MY FRONTIER," ETC.
+
+WITH A MEMOIR OF THE AUTHOR BY
+
+SURGEON-GENERAL W.B. BANNERMAN I.M.S., C.S.I.
+
+WITH ILLUSTRATIONS BY J A. SHEPHERD AND A PORTRAIT
+
+LONDON
+
+
+1914
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+ "EHA"
+
+ I FEET AND HANDS
+ II BILLS OF BIRDS
+ III TAILS
+ IV NOSES
+ V EARS
+ VI TOMMY
+ VII THE BARN OWL
+ VIII DOMESTIC ANIMALS
+ IX SNAKES
+ X THE INDIAN SNAKE-CHARMER
+ XI CURES FOR SNAKE-BITE
+ XII THE COBRA BUNGALOW
+ XIII THE PANTHER I DID NOT SHOOT
+ XIV THE PURBHOO
+ XV THE COCONUT TREE
+ XVI THE BETEL NUT
+ XVII A HINDU FESTIVAL
+ XVIII INDIAN POVERTY
+ XIX BORROWED INDIAN WORDS
+
+
+
+
+Special thanks are due to the Editors and Proprietors of the _Strand
+Magazine, Pall Mall Magazine_ and _Times of India_ for their courtesy in
+permitting the reprinting of the articles in this book which originally
+appeared in their columns.
+
+
+
+
+LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS
+
+HALF-TONES
+
+ "EHA"
+
+ THE NOSE OF THE ELEPHANT BECOMING A HAND HAS REDEEMED ITS MIND
+
+ GOOD FOR ANY ROUGH JOB
+
+ HERE THE COMPETITION HAS BEEN VERY KEEN INDEED
+
+ THE RAT IS A NEAR RELATION OF THE SQUIRREL ZOOLOGICALLY
+ BUT PERSONALLY HE IS A GUTTER-SNIPE, AND
+ YOU MAY KNOW THAT BY ONE LOOK AT THE TAIL, WHICH
+ HE DRAGS AFTER HIM LIKE A DIRTY ROPE
+
+ A BLACKBIRD AND A STARLING--THE ONE LIFTS ITS SKIRTS,
+ WHILE THE OTHER WEARS A WALKING DRESS
+
+ THE NOSTRILS OF THE APTERYX ARE AT THE TIP OF ITS BEAK
+
+ THE LONG-NOSED MONKEY
+
+
+LINE BLOCKS
+
+ AN AUTHENTIC STANDARD FOOT
+
+ THESE BEASTS ARE ALL CLODHOPPERS, AND THEIR FEET
+ ARE HOBNAILED BOOTS
+
+ IT HAS TO DOUBLE THEM UNDER AND HOBBLE ABOUT LIKE
+ A CHINESE LADY
+
+ NO DOUBT EACH BIRD SWEARS BY ITS OWN PATTERN
+
+ ITS BILL DESERVES STUDY
+
+ AS WONDERFUL AS THE PELICAN, BUT HOW OPPOSITE!
+
+ THERE ARE SOME ECCENTRICS, SUCH AS JENNY WREN, WHICH
+ HAVE DESPISED THEIR TAILS
+
+ AT THE SIGHT OF A RIVAL THE DOG HOLDS ITS TAIL UP STIFFLY
+
+ A SHREW CAN DO IT, BUT NOT A MAN
+
+ A BOLD ATTEMPT TO GROW IN THE CASE OF A TAPIR
+
+ I HAVE SEEN HUMAN NOSES OF A PATTERN NOT UNLIKE THIS,
+ BUT THEY ARE NOT CONSIDERED ARISTOCRATIC
+
+ WHO CAN CONSIDER THAT NOSE SERIOUSLY?
+
+ OR PERHAPS WHEN IT WANTS TO LISTEN IT RAISES A FLIPPER TO ITS EAR
+
+ "TEAR OUT THE HOUSE LIKE THE DOGS WUZ ATTER HIM"
+
+ A GREAT CATHOLIC CONGRESS OF DISTINGUISHED EARS
+
+ THE CURLS OF A MOTHER'S DARLING
+
+
+
+
+INTRODUCTION
+
+
+"EHA"
+
+Edward Hamilton Aitken, the author of the following sketches, was well
+known to the present generation of Anglo-Indians, by his pen-name of
+Eha, as an accurate and amusing writer on natural history subjects.
+Those who were privileged to know him intimately, as the writer of this
+sketch did, knew him as a Christian gentleman of singular simplicity and
+modesty and great charm of manner. He was always ready to help a
+fellow-worker in science or philanthropy if it were possible for him to
+do so. Thus, indeed, began the friendship between us. For when plague
+first invaded India in 1896, the writer was one of those sent to Bombay
+to work at the problem of its causation from the scientific side,
+thereby becoming interested in the life history of rats, which were
+shown to be intimately connected with the spread of this dire disease.
+Having for years admired Eha's books on natural history--_The Tribes on
+my Frontier, An Indian Naturalist's Foreign Policy_, and _The
+Naturalist on the Prowl_, I ventured to write to him on the subject of
+rats and their habits, and asked him whether he could not throw some
+light on the problem of plague and its spread, from the naturalist's
+point of view.
+
+In response to this appeal he wrote a most informing and characteristic
+article for _The Times of India_ (July 19, 1899), which threw a flood of
+light on the subject of the habits and characteristics of the Indian rat
+as found in town and country. He was the first to show that _Mus
+rattus_, the old English black rat, which is the common house rat of
+India outside the large seaports, has become, through centuries of
+contact with the Indian people, a domestic animal like the cat in
+Britain. When one realises the fact that this same rat is responsible
+for the spread of plague in India, and that every house is full of them,
+the value of this naturalist's observation is plain. Thus began an
+intimacy which lasted till Eha's death in 1909.
+
+The first time I met Mr. Aitken was at a meeting of the Free Church of
+Scotland Literary Society in 1899, when he read a paper on the early
+experiences, of the English in Bombay. The minute he entered the room I
+recognised him from the caricatures of himself in the _Tribes_. The
+long, thin, erect, bearded man was unmistakable, with a typically Scots
+face lit up with the humorous twinkle one came to know so well. Many a
+time in after-years has that look been seen as he discoursed, as only he
+could, on the ways of man and beast, bird or insect, as one tramped
+with him through the jungles on the hills around Bombay during week-ends
+spent with him at Vehar or elsewhere. He was an ideal companion on such
+occasions, always at his best when acting the part of _The Naturalist on
+the Prowl._
+
+Mr. Aitken was born at Satara in the Bombay Presidency on August 16,
+1851. His father was the Rev. James Aitken, missionary of the Free
+Church of Scotland. His mother was a sister of the Rev. Daniel Edward,
+missionary to the Jews at Breslau for some fifty years. He was educated
+by his father in India, and one can well realise the sort of education
+he got from such parents from the many allusions to the Bible and its
+old Testament characters that one constantly finds used with such effect
+in his books. His farther education was obtained at Bombay and Poona. He
+passed M.A. and B.A. of Bombay University first on the list, and won the
+Homejee Cursetjee prize with a poem in 1880. From 1870 to 1876 he was
+Latin Reader in the Deccan College at Poona, which accounts for the
+extensive acquaintance with the Latin classics so charmingly manifest in
+his writings. That he was well grounded in Greek is also certain, for
+the writer, while living in a chummery with him in Bombay in 1902, saw
+him constantly reading the Greek Testament in the mornings without the
+aid of a dictionary.
+
+He entered the Customs and Salt Department of the Government of Bombay
+in April 1876, and served in Kharaghoda (the Dustypore of the _Tribes_),
+Uran, North Kanara and Goa Frontier, Ratnagiri, and Bombay itself. In
+May, 1903, he was appointed Chief Collector of Customs and Salt Revenue
+at Karachi, and in November, 1905, was made Superintendent in charge of
+the District Gazetteer of Sind. He retired from the service in August
+1906.
+
+He married in 1883 the daughter of the Rev. J. Chalmers Blake, and left
+a family of two sons and three daughters.
+
+In 1902 he was deputed, on special duty, to investigate the prevalence
+of malaria at the Customs stations along the frontier of Goa, and to
+devise means for removing the Salt Peons at these posts, from the
+neighbourhood of the anopheles mosquito, by that time recognised as the
+cause of the deadly malaria, which made service on that frontier dreaded
+by all.
+
+It was during this expedition that he discovered a new species of
+anopheline mosquito, which after identification by Major James, I.M.S.,
+was named after him _Anopheles aitkeni_. During his long service there
+are to be found in the Annual Reports of the Customs Department frequent
+mention of Mr. Aitken's good work, but it is doubtful whether the
+Government ever fully realised what an able literary man they had in
+their service, wasting his talent in the Salt Department. On two
+occasions only did congenial work come to him in the course of his
+public duty--namely, when he was sent to study, from the naturalist's
+point of view, the malarial conditions prevailing on the frontier of
+Goa; and when during the last two years of his service he was put in
+literary charge of _The Sind Gazetteer_. In this book one can see the
+light and graceful literary touch of Eha frequently cropping up amidst
+the dry bones of public health and commercial statistics, and the book
+is enlivened by innumerable witty and philosophic touches appearing in
+the most unlikely places, such as he alone could enliven a dull subject
+with. Would that all Government gazetteers were similarly adorned! But
+there are not many "Ehas" in Government employ in India.
+
+On completion of this work he retired to Edinburgh, where most of the
+sketches contained in this volume were written. He was very happy with
+his family in his home at Morningside, and was beginning to surround
+himself with pets and flowers, as was his wont all his life, and to get
+a good connection with the home newspapers and magazines, when, alas!
+death stepped in, and he died after a short illness on April 25, 1909.
+
+He was interested in the home birds and beasts as he had been with those
+in India, and the last time the writer met him he was taking home some
+gold-fish for his aquarium. A few days before his death he had found his
+way down to the Morningside cemetery, where he had been enjoying the
+sunshine and flowers of Spring, and he remarked to his wife that he
+would often go there in future to watch the birds building their nests.
+
+Before that time came, he was himself laid to rest in that very spot in
+sure and certain hope of a blessed resurrection.
+
+The above imperfect sketch fails to give the charm and magnetic
+attraction of the man, and for this one must go to his works, which for
+those who knew him are very illuminating in this respect. In them one
+catches a glimpse of his plan for keeping young and cheerful in "the
+land of regrets," for one of his charms was his youthfulness and
+interest in life. He refused to be depressed by his lonely life. "I am
+only an exile," he remarks, "endeavouring to work a successful existence
+in Dustypore, and not to let my environment shape me as a pudding takes
+the shape of its mould, but to make it tributary to my own happiness."
+He therefore urges his readers to cultivate a hobby.
+
+"It is strange," he says, "that Europeans in India know so little, see
+so little, care so little, about all the intense life that surrounds
+them. The boy who was the most ardent of bug-hunters, or the most
+enthusiastic of bird-nesters in England, where one shilling will buy
+nearly all that is known, or can be known, about birds or butterflies,
+maintains in this country, aided by Messrs. B. &. S., an unequal strife
+with the insupportableness of an _ennui_-smitten life. Why, if he would
+stir up for one day the embers of the old flame, he could not quench it
+again with such a prairie of fuel around him. I am not speaking of
+Bombay people, with their clubs and gymkhanas and other devices for
+oiling the wheels of existence, but of the dreary up-country exile,
+whose life is a blank, a moral Sahara, a catechism of the Nihilist
+creed. What such a one needs is a hobby. Every hobby is good--a sign of
+good and an influence for good. Any hobby will draw out the mind, but
+the one I plead for touches the soul too, keeps the milk of human
+kindness from souring, puts a gentle poetry into the prosiest life. That
+all my own finer feelings have not long since withered in this land of
+separation from 'old familiar faces,' I attribute partly to a pair of
+rabbits. All rabbits are idiotic things, but these come in and sit up
+meekly and beg a crust of bread, and even a perennial fare of village
+_moorgee_ cannot induce me to issue the order for their execution and
+conversion into pie. But if such considerations cannot lead, the
+struggle for existence should drive a man in this country to learn the
+ways of his border tribes. For no one, I take it, who reflects for an
+instant will deny that a small mosquito, with black rings upon a white
+ground, or a sparrow that has finally made up its mind to rear a family
+in your ceiling, exercises an influence on your personal happiness far
+beyond the Czar of the Russias. It is not a question of scientific
+frontiers--the enemy invades us on all, sides. We are plundered,
+insulted, phlebotomised under our own vine and fig-tree. We might make
+head against the foe if we laid to heart the lesson our national history
+in India teaches--namely, that the way to fight uncivilised enemies is
+to encourage them to cut one another's throats, and then step in and
+inherit the spoil. But we murder our friends, exterminate our allies,
+and then groan under the oppression of the enemy. I might illustrate
+this by the case of the meek and long-suffering musk-rat, by spiders or
+ants, but these must wait another day."
+
+Again he says, "The 'poor dumb animals' can give each other a bit of
+their minds like their betters, and to me their fierce and tender little
+passions, their loves and hates, their envies and jealousies, and their
+small vanities beget a sense of fellow-feeling which makes their
+presence society. The touch of Nature which makes the whole world kin is
+infirmity. A man without a weakness is insupportable company, and so is
+a man who does not feel the heat. There is a large grey ring-dove that
+sits in the blazing sun all through the hottest hours of the day, and
+says coo-coo, coo, coo-coo, coo until the melancholy sweet monotony of
+that sound is as thoroughly mixed up in my brain with 110° in the shade
+as physic in my infantile memories with the peppermint lozenges which
+used to 'put away the taste,' But as for these creatures, which confess
+the heat and come into the house and gasp, I feel drawn to them. I
+should like to offer them cooling drinks. Not that all my midday guests
+are equally welcome: I could dispense, for instance, with the
+grey-ringed bee which has just reconnoitred my ear for the third time,
+and guesses it is a key-hole--she is away just now, but only, I fancy,
+for clay to stop it up with. There are others also to which I would give
+their _congé_ if they would take it. But good, bad, or indifferent they
+give us their company whether we want it or not."
+
+Eha certainly found company in beasts all his life, and kept the charm
+of youth about him in consequence to the end. If his lot were cast, as
+it often was, in lonely places, he kept pets, and made friends besides
+of many of the members of the tribes on his frontier; if in Bombay city
+he consoled himself with his aquarium and the museum of the Bombay
+Natural History Society. When the present writer chummed with him in a
+flat on the Apollo Bunder in Bombay, he remembers well that aquarium and
+the Sunday-morning expeditions to the malarious ravines at the back of
+Malabar Hill to search for mosquito larvae to feed its inmates. For at
+that time Mr. Aitken was investigating the capabilities for the
+destruction of larvae, of a small surface-feeding fish with an
+ivory-white spot on the top of its head, which he had found at Vehar in
+the stream below the bund. It took him some time to identify these
+particular fishes (_Haplochilus lineatus_), and in the meantime he
+dubbed them "Scooties" from the lightning rapidity of their movements,
+and in his own admirable manner made himself a sharer of their joys and
+sorrows, their cares and interests. With these he stocked the ornamental
+fountains of Bombay to keep them from becoming breeding-grounds for
+mosquitoes, and they are now largely used throughout India for this very
+purpose. It will be recognised, therefore, that Mr. Aitken studied
+natural history not only for its own sake, but as a means of benefiting
+the people of India, whom he had learned to love, as is so plainly shown
+in _Behind the Bungalow_.
+
+He was an indefatigable worker in the museum of the Bombay Natural
+History Society, which he helped to found, and many of his papers and
+notes are preserved for us in the pages of its excellent _Journal_, of
+which he was an original joint-editor. He was for long secretary of the
+Insect Section, and then president. Before his retirement he was elected
+one of the Vice-Presidents of the Society.
+
+Mr. Aitken was a deeply religious man, and was for some twenty years an
+elder in the congregation of the United Free Church of Scotland in
+Bombay. He was for some years Superintendent of the Sunday School in
+connection with this congregation, and a member of the Committee of the
+Bombay Scottish Orphanage and the Scottish High Schools. His former
+minister says of him, "He was deeply interested in theology, and
+remained wonderfully orthodox in spite of" (or, as the present writer
+would prefer to say, _because of_) "his scientific knowledge. He always
+thought that the evidence for the doctrine of evolution had been pressed
+for more than it was worth, and he had many criticisms to make upon the
+Higher Critics of the Bible. Many a discussion we had, in which, against
+me, he took the conservative side."
+
+He lets one see very clearly into the workings of his mind in this
+direction in what is perhaps the finest, although the least well known
+of his books, _The Five Windows of the Soul_ (John Murray), in which he
+discourses in his own inimitable way of the five senses, and how they
+bring man and beast into contact with their surroundings. It is a book
+on perceiving, and shows how according as this faculty is exercised it
+makes each man such as he is. The following extract from the book shows
+Mr. Aitken's style, and may perhaps induce some to go to the book itself
+for more from the same source. He is speaking of the moral sense. "And
+it is almost a truism to say that, if a man has any taste, it will show
+itself in his dress and in his dwelling. No doubt, through indolence and
+slovenly habits, a man may allow his surroundings to fall far below what
+he is capable of approving; but every one who does so pays the penalty
+in the gradual deterioration of his perceptions.
+
+"How many times more true is all this in the case of the moral sense?
+When the heart is still young and tender, how spontaneously and sweetly
+and urgently does every vision of goodness and nobleness in the conduct
+of another awaken the impulse to go and do likewise! And if that impulse
+is not obeyed, how certainly does the first approving perception of the
+beauty of goodness become duller, until at last we may even come to hate
+it where we find it, for its discordance with the 'motions of sins in
+our members'!
+
+"But not less certainly will every earnest effort to bring the life into
+unison with what we perceive to be right bring its own reward in a
+clearer and more joyful perception of what is right, and a keener
+sensitiveness to every discord in ourselves. How all such discord may be
+removed, how the chords of the heart may be tuned and the life become
+music,--these are questions of religion, which are quite beyond our
+scope. But I take it that every religion which has prevailed among the
+children of Adam is in itself an evidence that, however debased and
+perverted the moral sense may have become, the painful consciousness
+that his heart is 'like sweet bells jangled' still presses everywhere
+and always on the spirit of man; and it is also a conscious or
+unconscious admission that there is no blessedness for him until his
+life shall march in step with the music of the 'Eternal Righteousness.'"
+
+Mr. Aitken's name will be kept green among Anglo-Indians by the
+well-known series of books published by Messrs. Thacker & Co., of London
+and Calcutta. They are _The Tribes on my Frontier, An Indian
+Naturalist's Foreign Policy_, which was published in 1883, and of which
+a seventh edition appeared in 1910. This book deals with the common
+birds, beasts, and insects in and around an Indian bungalow, and it
+should be put into the hands of every one whose lot is cast in India. It
+will open their eyes to the beauty and interests of their surroundings
+in a truly wonderful way, and may be read again and again with
+increasing pleasure as one's experience of Indian life increases.
+
+This was followed in 1889 by _Behind the Bungalow_, which describes with
+charming insight the strange manners and customs of our Indian domestic
+servants. The witty and yet kindly way in which their excellencies and
+defects are touched off is delightful, and many a harassed _mem-sahib_
+must bless Eha for showing her the humorous and human side of her life
+surrounded as it is by those necessary but annoying inhabitants of the
+Godowns behind the bungalow. A tenth edition of this book was published
+in 1911.
+
+_The Naturalist on the Prowl_ was brought out in 1894, and a third
+edition was published in 1905. It contains sketches on the same lines as
+those in _The Tribes_, but deals more with the jungles, and not so much
+with the immediate surroundings of the bungalow. The very smell of the
+country is in these chapters, and will vividly recall memories to those
+who know the country along the West Coast of India southward of Bombay.
+
+In 1900 was published _The Common Birds of Bombay_, which contains
+descriptions of the ordinary birds one sees about the bungalow or in the
+country. As is well said by the writer of the obituary notice in the
+_Journal_ of the Bombay Natural History Society, Eha "had a special
+genius for seizing the striking and characteristic points in the
+appearance and behaviour of individual species and a happy knack of
+translating them into print so as to render his descriptions
+unmistakable. He looked upon all creatures in the proper way, as if each
+had a soul and character of its own. He loved them all, and was
+unwilling to hurt any of them." These characteristics are well shown in
+this book, for one is able to recognise the birds easily from some
+prominent feature described therein.[1]
+
+_The Five Windows of the Soul_, published by John Murray in 1898, is of
+quite another character from the above, and was regarded by its author
+with great affection as the best of his books. It is certainly a
+wonderfully self-revealing book, and full of the most beautiful
+thoughts. A second impression appeared in the following year, and a new
+and cheaper edition has just been published. The portrait of Eha is
+reproduced from one taken in 1902 in a flat on the Apollo Bunder, and
+shows the man as he was in workaday life in Bombay. The humorous and
+kindly look is, I think, well brought out, and will stir pleasant
+memories in all who knew Mr. Aitken.
+
+W. B. B.
+
+MADRAS, _January_ 1914.
+
+
+
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[Footnote 1: The illustrations are his own work, but the blocks having
+been produced in India, they do not do justice to the extreme delicacy
+of workmanship and fine perception of detail which characterise the
+originals, as all who have been privileged to see these will agree.]
+
+
+
+
+CONCERNING ANIMALS
+
+
+
+
+I
+
+
+FEET AND HANDS
+
+It is evident that, in what is called the evolution of animal forms, the
+foot came in suddenly when the backboned creatures began to live on the
+dry land--that is, with the frogs. How it came in is a question which
+still puzzles the phylogenists, who cannot find a sure pedigree for the
+frog. There it is, anyhow, and the remarkable point about it is that the
+foot of a frog is not a rudimentary thing, but an authentic standard
+foot, like the yard measure kept in the Tower of London, of which all
+other feet are copies or adaptations. This instrument, as part of the
+original outfit given to the pioneers of the brainy, backboned, and
+four-limbed races, when they were sent out to multiply and replenish the
+earth, is surely worth considering well. It consists essentially of a
+sole, or palm, made up of small bones and of _five_ separate digits,
+each with several joints.
+
+[Illustration: AN AUTHENTIC STANDARD FOOT.]
+
+In the hind foot of a frog the toes are very long and webbed from point
+to point. In this it differs a good deal from the toad, and there is
+significance in the difference. The "heavy-gaited toad," satisfied with
+sour ants, hard beetles, and such other fare as it can easily pick up,
+and grown nasty in consequence, so that nothing seeks to eat it, has
+hobbled through life, like a plethoric old gentleman, until the present
+day, on its original feet. The more versatile and nimble-witted frog,
+seeking better diet and greater security of life, went back to the
+element in which it was bred, and, swimming much, became better fitted
+for swimming. The soft elastic skin between the fingers or toes is just
+the sort of tissue which responds most readily to inward impulses, and
+we find that the very same change has come about in those birds and
+beasts which live much in water. I know that this is not the accepted
+theory of evolution, but I am waiting till it shall become so. We all
+develop in the direction of our tendencies, and shall, I doubt not, be
+wise enough some day to give animals leave to do the same.
+
+It seems strange that any creature, furnished with such tricky and
+adaptable instruments to go about the world with, should tire of them
+and wish to get rid of them, but so it happened at a very early stage.
+It must have been a consequence, I think, of growing too fast. Mark
+Twain remarked about a dachshund that it seemed to want another pair of
+legs in the middle to prevent it sagging. Now, some lizards are so long
+that they cannot keep from sagging, and their progress becomes a painful
+wriggle. But if you must go by wriggling, then what is the use of legs
+to knock against stems and stones? So some lizards have discarded two of
+their legs and some all four. Zoologically they are not snakes, but
+snakes are only a further advance in the same direction. That snakes did
+not start fair without legs is clear, for the python has to this day two
+tell-tale leg-bones buried in its flesh.
+
+When we pass from reptiles to birds, lo! an astounding thing has
+happened. That there were flying reptiles in the fossil ages we know,
+and there are flying beasts in our own. But the wings of these are
+simple mechanical alterations, which the imagination of a child, or a
+savage, could explain.
+
+The hands of a bat are hands still, and, though the fingers are hampered
+by their awkward gloves, the thumbs are free. The giant fruit bats of
+the tropics clamber about the trees quite acrobatically with their
+thumbs and feet.
+
+That Apollyonic monster of the prime, the pterodactyl, did even better.
+Stretching on each little finger a lateen sail that would have served to
+waft a skiff across the Thames, it kept the rest of its hands for other
+uses. But what bearing has all this on the case of birds? Here is a
+whole sub-kingdom, as they call it, of the animal world which has
+unreservedly and irrevocably bartered one pair of its limbs for a
+flying-machine. The apparatus is made of feathers--a new invention,
+unknown to amphibian or saurian, whence obtained nobody can say--and
+these are grafted into the transformed frame of the old limbs. The
+bargain was worth making, for the winged bird at once soared away in all
+senses from the creeping things of earth, and became a more ethereal
+being; "like a blown flame, it rests upon the air, subdues it, surpasses
+it, outraces it; it is the air, conscious of itself, conquering itself,
+ruling itself." But the price was heavy. The bird must get through life
+with one pair of feet and its mouth. But this was all the bodily
+furniture of Charles François Felu, who, without arms, became a famous
+artist.
+
+A friend of mine, standing behind him in a _salon_ and watching him at
+work, saw him lay down his brush and, raising his foot to his head, take
+off his hat and scratch his crown with his great toe. My friend was
+nearly hypnotised by the sight, yet it scarcely strikes us as a wonder
+when a parrot, standing on one foot, takes its meals with the other. It
+is a wonder, and stamps the parrot as a bird of talent. A mine of hidden
+possibilities is in us all, but those who dig resolutely into it and
+bring out treasure are few.
+
+And let us note that the art of standing began with birds. Frogs sit,
+and, as far as I know, every reptile, be it lizard, crocodile,
+alligator, or tortoise, lays its body on the ground when not actually
+carrying it. And these have each four fat legs. Contrast the flamingo,
+which, having only two, and those like willow wands, tucks up one of
+them and sleeps poised high on the other, like a tulip on its stem.
+
+Note also that one toe has been altogether discarded by birds as
+superfluous. The germ, or bud, must be there, for the Dorking fowl has
+produced a fifth toe under some influence of the poultry-yard, but no
+natural bird has more than four. Except in swifts, which never perch,
+but cling to rocks and walls, one is turned backwards, and, by a cunning
+contrivance, the act of bending the leg draws them all automatically
+together. So a hen closes its toes at every step it takes, as if it
+grasped something, and, of course, when it settles down on its roost,
+they grasp that tight and hold it fast till morning. But to birds that
+do not perch this mechanism is only an encumbrance, so many of them,
+like the plovers, abolish the hind toe entirely, and the prince of all
+two-legged runners, the ostrich, has got rid of one of the front toes
+also, retaining only two.
+
+[Illustration: THESE BEASTS ARE ALL CLODHOPPERS, AND THEIR FEET ARE
+HOBNAILED BOOTS.]
+
+To a man who thinks, it is very interesting to observe that beasts have
+been led along gradually in the very same direction. All the common
+beasts, such as cats, dogs, rats, stoats, and so on, have five ordinary
+toes. On the hind feet there may be only four. But as soon as we come to
+those that feed on grass and leaves, standing or walking all the while,
+we find that the feet are shod with hoofs instead of being tipped with
+claws. First the five toes, though clubbed together, have each a
+separate hoof, as in the elephant; then the hippopotamus follows with
+four toes, and the rhinoceros with practically three. These beasts are
+all clodhoppers, and their feet are hobnailed boots. The more active
+deer and all cattle keep only two toes for practical purposes, though
+stumps of two more remain. Finally, the horse gathers all its foot into
+one boot, and becomes the champion runner of the world.
+
+It is not without significance that this degeneracy of the feet goes
+with a decline in the brain, whether as cause or effect I will not
+pretend to know. These hoofed beasts have shallow natures and live
+shallow lives. They eat what is spread by Nature before their noses,
+have no homes, and do nothing but feed and fight with each other. The
+elephant is a notable exception, but then the nose of the elephant,
+becoming a hand, has redeemed its mind. As for the horse, whatever its
+admirers may say, it is just a great ass. There is a lesson in all this:
+"from him that hath not shall be taken even that which he hath."
+
+There is another dull beast which, from the point of view of the mere
+systematist, seems as far removed from those that wear hoofs as it could
+be, but the philosopher, considering the point at which it has arrived,
+rather than the route by which it got there, will class it with them,
+for its idea of life is just theirs turned topsy-turvy. The nails of the
+sloth, instead of being hammered into hoofs on the hard ground, have
+grown long and curved, like those of a caged bird, and become hooks by
+which it can hang, without effort, in the midst of the leaves on which
+it feeds. A minimum of intellect is required for such an existence, and
+the sloth has lost any superfluous brain that it may have had, as well
+as two, or even three, of its five toes.
+
+To return to those birds and beasts with standard feet, I find that the
+first outside purpose for which they find them serviceable is to scratch
+themselves. This is a universal need. But a foot is handy in many other
+ways. A hen and chickens, getting into my garden, transferred a whole
+flower-bed to the walk in half an hour. Yet a bird trying to do anything
+with its foot is like a man putting on his socks standing, and birds as
+a race have turned their feet to very little account outside of their
+original purpose. Such a simple thing as holding down its food with one
+foot scarcely occurs to an ordinary bird. A hen will pull about a
+cabbage leaf and shake it in the hope that a small piece may come away,
+but it never enters her head to put her foot on it. In this and other
+matters the parrot stands apart, and also the hawk, eagle, and owl; but
+these are not ordinary birds.
+
+Beasts, having twice as many feet as birds, have learned to apply them
+to many uses. They dig with them, hold down their food with them, fondle
+their children with them, paw their friends, and scratch their enemies.
+One does more of one thing and another of another, and the feet soon
+show the effects of the occupation, the claws first, then the muscles,
+and even the bones dwindling by disuse, or waxing stout and strong. Then
+the joy of doing what it can do well impels the beast further on the
+same path, and its offspring after it.
+
+[Illustration: THE NOSE OF THE ELEPHANT BECOMING A HAND HAS REDEEMED
+ITS MIND]
+
+And this leads at last to specialism. The Indian black bear is a "handy
+man," like the British Tar--good all round. Its great soft paw is a very
+serviceable tool and weapon, armed with claws which will take the face
+off a man or grub up a root with equal ease. When a black bear has found
+an ant-hill it takes but a few minutes to tear up the hard, cemented
+clay and lay the deep galleries bare; then, putting its gutta-percha
+muzzle to the mouth of each, it draws such a blast of air through them
+that the industrious labourers are sucked into its gullet in drifts.
+Afterwards it digs right down to the royal chamber, licks up the bloated
+queen, and goes its way.
+
+But there is another worker in the same mine which does not go to work
+this way. The ant-eater found fat termites so satisfying that it left
+all other things and devoted its life to the exploiting of anthills, and
+now it has no rival at that business, but it is fit for nothing else.
+Its awkward digging tools will not allow it to put the sole of its foot
+to the ground, so it has to double them under and hobble about like a
+Chinese lady. It has no teeth, and stupidity is the most prominent
+feature of its character. It has become that poor thing, a man of one
+idea.
+
+But the bear is like a sign-post at a parting of the ways. If you
+compare a brown bear with the black Indian, or sloth bear, as it is
+sometimes called, you may detect a small but pregnant difference. When
+the former walks, its claws are lifted, so that their points do not
+touch the ground. Why? I have no information, but I know that it is not
+content with a vegetarian diet, like its black relative, but hankers
+after sheep and goats, and I guess that its murderous thoughts flow down
+its nerves to those keen claws. It reminds me of a man clenching his
+fist unconsciously when he thinks of the liar who has slandered him.
+
+[Illustration: IT HAS TO DOUBLE THEM UNDER AND HOBBLE ABOUT LIKE A
+CHINESE LADY.]
+
+But what ages of concentration on the thought and practice of
+assassination must have been required to perfect that most awful weapon
+in Nature, the paw of a tiger, or, indeed, of any cat, for they are all
+of one pattern. The sharpened flint of the savage has become the
+scimitar of Saladin, keeping the keenness of its edge in a velvet sheath
+and flashing out only on the field of battle. Compare that paw with the
+foot of a dog, and you will, perhaps, see with me that the servility and
+pliancy of the slave of man has usurped a place in his esteem which is
+not its due. The cat is much the nobler animal. Dogs, with wolves,
+jackals, and all of their kin, love to fall upon their victim in
+overwhelming force, like a rascally mob, and bite, tear, and worry until
+the life has gone out of it; the tiger, rushing single-handed, with a
+fearful challenge, on the gigantic buffalo, grasps its nose with one paw
+and its shoulder with the other, and has broken its massive neck in a
+manner so dexterous and instantaneous that scarcely two sportsmen can
+agree about how the thing is done.
+
+I have said that the foot first appeared when the backboned creatures
+came out of the waters to live upon the dry land. But all mundane things
+(not excepting politics) tend to move in circles, ending where they
+began; and so the foot, if we follow it far enough, will take us back
+into water. See how the rat--I mean our common, omnivorous, scavenging,
+thieving, poaching brown rat--when it lives near a pond or stream,
+learns to swim and dive as naturally as a duck. Next comes the vole, or
+water-rat, which will not live away from water. Then there are water
+shrews, the beaver, otter, duck-billed platypus, and a host of others,
+not related, just as, among birds, there are water ousels, moorhens,
+ducks, divers, etc., which have permanently made the water their home
+and seek their living in it. All these have attained to web-footedness
+in a greater or less degree.
+
+That this has occurred among reptiles, beasts, and birds alike shows
+what an easy, or natural, or obvious (put it as you will) modification
+it is. And it has a consequence not to be escaped. Just as a man who
+rides a great deal and never walks acquires a certain indirectness of
+the legs, and you never mistake a jockey for a drill-sergeant, so the
+web-footed beasts are not among the things that are "comely in going."
+
+Following this road you arrive at the seal and sea-lion. Of all the feet
+that I have looked at I know only one more utterly ridiculous than the
+twisted flipper on which the sea-lion props his great bulk in front,
+and that is the forked fly-flap which extends from the hinder parts of
+the same. How can it be worth any beast's while to carry such an absurd
+apparatus with it just for the sake of getting out into the air
+sometimes and pushing itself about on the ice and being eaten by Polar
+bears? The porpoise has discarded one pair, turned the other into decent
+fins, and recovered a grace and power of motion in water which are not
+equalled by the greyhound on land. Why have the seals hung back? I
+believe I know the secret. It is the baby! No one knows where the
+porpoise and the whale cradle their newborn infants--it is so difficult
+to pry into the domestic ways of these sea-people--but evidently the
+seals cannot manage it, so they are forced to return to the land when
+the cares of maternity are on them.
+
+I have called the feet of these sea beasts ridiculous things, and so
+they are as we see them; but strip off the skin, and lo! there appears a
+plain foot, with its five digits, each of several joints, tipped with
+claws--nowise essentially different, in short, from that with which the
+toad, or frog, first set out in a past too distant for our infirm
+imagination. Admiration itself is paralysed by a contrivance so simple,
+so transmutable, and so sufficient for every need that time and change
+could bring.
+
+There remains yet one transformation which seems simple compared with
+some that I have noticed, but is more full of fate than they all; for
+by it the foot becomes a hand. This comes about by easy stages. The
+reason why one of a bird's four toes is turned back is quite plain:
+trees are the proper home of birds, and they require feet that will
+grasp branches. So those beasts also that have taken to living in trees
+have got one toe detached more or less from the rest and arranged so
+that it can co-operate with them to catch hold of a thing. Then other
+changes quickly follow. For, in judging whether you have got hold of a
+thing and how much force you must put forth to keep hold of it, you are
+guided entirely by the pressure on the finger-points, and to gauge this
+pressure nicely the nerves must be refined and educated. In fact, the
+exercise itself, with the intent direction of the mind to the
+finger-points, brings about the refinement and education in accordance
+with Sandow's principle of muscle culture.
+
+For an example of the result do not look at the gross paw of any
+so-called anthropoid ape, gorilla, orang-outang, or chimpanzee, but
+study the gentle lemur. At the point of each digit is a broad elastic
+pad, plentifully supplied with delicate nerves, and the vital energy
+which has been directed into them appears to have been withdrawn from
+the growth of the claws, which have shrunk into fine nails just
+shielding the fleshy tips. In short, the lemur has a hand on each of its
+four limbs, and no feet at all. And as it goes about its cage--I am at
+the Zoo in spirit--with a silent wonder shining out of its great eyes,
+it examines things by _feeling_ them with its hands.
+
+How plainly a new avenue from the outer world into its mind has been
+opened by those fingers! But how about scratching? What would be the
+gain of having higher susceptibilities and keener perceptions if they
+only aggravated the triumph of the insulting flea? Nay, this disaster
+has been averted by reserving a good sharp claw on the forefinger (not
+the thumb) of each hind hand.
+
+The old naturalists called the apes and lemurs Quadrumana, the
+"four-handed," and separated the Bimana, with one species--namely, _Homo
+sapiens_. Now we have anatomy cited to belittle the difference between a
+hand and a foot, and geology importuned to show us the missing link,
+pending which an order has been instituted roomy enough to hold monkeys,
+gorillas, and men. It is a strange perversity. How much more fitting it
+were to bow in reverent ignorance before the perfect hand, taken up from
+the ground, no more to dull its percipient surfaces on earth and stones
+and bark, but to minister to its lord's expanding mind and obey his
+creative will, while his frame stands upright and firm upon a single
+pair of true feet, with their toes all in one rank.
+
+
+
+
+II
+
+
+BILLS OF BIRDS
+
+The prospectus, or advertisement, of a certain American typewriting
+machine commences by informing the public that "The ---- typewriter is
+founded on an idea." When I saw this phrase I secured it for my
+collection, for I felt that, without jest, it contained the kernel of a
+true philosophy of Nature. The forms, the _phainomena_, of Nature are
+innumerable, multifarious, interwoven, and infinitely perplexing, and
+you may spend a happy life in unravelling their relations and devising
+their evolutions; but until you have looked through them and seen the
+ideas that are behind them you are a mere materialist and a blind
+worker. The soul of Nature is hid from you.
+
+What is the bill of a bird and what does it mean? I do not refer to the
+bill of a hawk, or a heron, or an owl, or an ostrich, but to that which
+is the abstract of all these and a thousand more. I hold, regardless of
+anatomy and physiology, that a bird is a higher being than a beast. No
+beast soars and sings to its sweetheart; no beast remains in lifelong
+partnership with the wife of its youth; no beast builds itself a
+summer-house and decks it with feathers and bright shells. A beast is a
+grovelling denizen of the earth; a bird is a free citizen of the air.
+And who can say that there is not a connection between this difference
+and other developments? The beast, thinking only of its appetites, has
+evolved a delicate nose, a discriminating palate, three kinds of teeth
+to cut, tear, and grind its food, salivary glands to moisten the same,
+and a perfected apparatus of digestion.
+
+[Illustration: GOOD FOR ANY ROUGH JOB]
+
+The bird, occupied with thoughts of love and beauty, with "fields, or
+waves, or mountains" and "shapes of sky or plain," has made little
+advance in the art and instruments of good living. It swallows its food
+whole, scarcely knowing the taste of it, and a pair of forceps for
+picking it up, tipped and cased with horn, is the whole of its dining
+furniture. For the bill of a bird, primarily and essentially, is that
+and nothing else. In the chickens and the sparrows that come to steal
+their food, and the robin that looks on, and all the little dicky-birds,
+you may see it in its simplicity. The size and shape may vary, as a
+Canadian axe differs from a Scotch axe; some are short and stout and
+have a sharp edge for shelling seeds; some are longer and fine-pointed,
+for picking worms and caterpillars out of their hiding-places; some a
+little hooked at their points, and one, that of the crossbill, with
+points crossed for picking the small seeds out of fir-cones; but all
+are practically the same tool. Yet the last distinctly points the way to
+those modifications by which the simple bill is gradually adapted to one
+special purpose or another, until it becomes a wonderful mechanism in
+which the original intention is quite out of sight.
+
+At this point I find an instructive parable in my tool chest. Fully half
+of the tools are just knives. A chisel is a knife, a plane is a knife
+set in a block of wood, a saw is a knife with the edge notched.
+Moreover, there are many sorts of curious planes and saws, each intended
+for one distinct kind of fine work. All these the joiner has need of,
+but a schoolboy would rather have one good, strong pocket-knife than the
+whole boxful. For, just in proportion as each tool is perfected for its
+own special work, it becomes useless for any other. And your schoolboy
+is not a specialist. He wants a tool that will cut a stick, carve a
+boat, peel an apple, dig out a worm--in short, one that will do whatever
+his active mind wants done.
+
+Now apply this parable to the birds. If you see a bill that is nothing
+but a large and powerful pair of forceps, good for any rough job, you
+may know without further inquiry that the owner is no limited
+specialist, but a "handy man," bold, enterprising, resourceful, and good
+all round. He will not starve in the desert. No wholesome food comes
+amiss to him--grub, slug, or snail, fruit, eggs, a live mouse or a dead
+rat, and he can deal with them all. Such are the magpie, the crow, the
+jackdaw, and all of that ilk; and these are the birds that are found in
+all countries and climates, and prosper wherever they go.
+
+[Illustration: NO DOUBT EACH BIRD SWEARS BY ITS OWN PATTERN.]
+
+But all birds cannot play that part. One is timid, another fastidious,
+another shy but ingenious. So, in the universal competition for a
+living, each has taken its own line according to the bent of its nature,
+and its one tool has been perfected for its trade until it can follow no
+other. The thrush catches such worms as rashly show themselves
+above-ground; but an ancient ancestor of the snipe found that, if it
+followed them into marshy lands, it could probe the soft ground and drag
+them out of their chambers. For this operation it has now a bill three
+inches long, straight, thin and sensitive at the tip, a beautiful
+instrument, but good for no purpose except extracting worms from soft
+ground. If frost or drought hardens the ground, the snipe must starve or
+travel. Among the many "lang nebbit" birds that follow the same
+profession as the snipe, some, like the curlew and the ibis, have curved
+bills of prodigious length. I do not know the comparative advantages of
+the two forms, but no doubt each bird swears by its own pattern, as
+every golfer does by his own putter.
+
+But now behold another grub-hunter, which, distasting mud, has
+discovered an unworked mine in the trunks of trees. There, in deep
+burrows, lurked great succulent beetle-grubs, demanding only a tool with
+which they might be dug out. This has been perfected by many stages, and
+I have now before me a splendid specimen of the most improved
+pattern--namely, the bill of the great black woodpecker of Western
+India, a bird nearly as big as a crow. It is nothing else than a hatchet
+in two parts, which, when locked together, present a steeled edge about
+three-eighths of an inch in breadth. The hatchet is two and a half
+inches long by one in breadth at the base, and a prominent ridge, or
+keel, runs down the top from base to point. It is further strengthened
+by a keel on each side. Inside of it, ere the bird became a mummy, was
+her tongue, which I myself drew out three inches beyond the point of the
+bill. It was rough and tough, like gutta-percha, tipped with a fine
+spike, and armed on each side, for the last inch of its length, with a
+row of sharp barbs pointing backwards. The whole was lubricated with
+some patent stickfast, "always ready for use." That grub must sit tight
+indeed which this corkscrew will not draw when once the hatchet has
+opened a way.
+
+The swallows and swifts, untirable on their wings, but too gentle to
+hold their own in a jostling crowd, soared away after the midges and
+May-flies and pestilent gnats that rise from marsh and pond to hold
+their joyous dances under the blue dome. Continually rushing
+open-mouthed after these, they have stretched their gape from ear to
+ear; but their bills have dwindled by disuse and left only an apology
+for their absence.
+
+Compared with all these, the birds that can do with a diet of fruit only
+lead an easy life. They have just to pluck and eat--that is, if they are
+pleased with small fruits and content to swallow them whole. But the
+hornbills, being too bulky to hop among twigs, need a long reach; hence
+the portentous machines which they carry on their faces. The beak of a
+hornbill is nothing else than a pair of tongs long enough to reach and
+strong enough to wrench off a wild fig from its thick stem. If it were
+of iron it would be thin and heavy; being of cellular horn-stuff it is
+bulky but light. If you ask why it should rise up into an absurd helmet
+on the queer fowl's head, I cannot tell. Nature has quaint ways of using
+up surplus material.
+
+[Illustration: ITS BILL DESERVES STUDY]
+
+An easy life begets luxury, and among fruit-eaters the parrot has become
+an epicure. It will not swallow its food whole, and its bill deserves
+study. In birds generally the upper mandible is more or less joined to
+the skull, leaving only the lower jaw free to move. But in the parrot
+the upper mandible is also hinged, so that each plays freely on the
+other. The upper, as we all know, is hooked and pointed; the lower has a
+sharp edge. The tongue is thick, muscular, and sensitive. The whole
+makes a wonderful instrument, unique among birds, for feelingly
+manipulating a dainty morsel, shelling, peeling, and slicing, until
+nothing is left but the sweetest part of the core. Of all gourmands
+Polly is the most shameless waster.
+
+Long before land, trees, and air had been exploited the primitive bird
+must have discovered the harvest of the waters, and here the competition
+has been very keen indeed. Yet the form of bill most in use is very
+simple--just a plain pair of forceps, long and sharp-pointed like
+scissors. This is evidently hard to beat, for birds of many sorts use
+it, handling it variously. The kingfisher plumps bodily down on the
+minnow from an overhanging perch; the solan goose, soaring, plunges from
+a "pernicious height"; the heron, high on its stilts, darts out a long
+and serpentine neck; the diver, with similar beak and neck, but
+different legs, pursues the fleeing shoals under water; to the swift and
+slippery fish all are alike terrible in their certainty.
+
+There are, however, other varieties of the fishing bill. Some have a
+hook at the point, as that of the cormorant, and some are straight at
+the top, but curved on the under side. This last form is handy for
+storks, which do not pluck fish out of water so much, but scoop up
+frogs, crabs, and reptiles from the ground. The ridiculous bill of the
+puffin, or sea-parrot, is an eccentricity. There may be some idea in it,
+but I suspect it is an effect of vanity merely, being coloured blue,
+yellow, and red, and quite in keeping with the other absurdities of the
+wearer.
+
+Apart from all these and by itself stands a princely fisher whose bill
+is no modification, but an original invention and a marvellous one.
+Larger than a swan and gluttonous withal, the pelican cannot live on
+single fishes. It has given up angling altogether and taken to netting;
+and the way in which the net has been constructed out of the pair of
+forceps provided in the original plan of its construction is as well
+worth your examining as anything I know. It is a foot in length, the
+upper jaw is flat and broad, while the lower consists of two thin,
+elastic bones joined at the point, a mere ring to carry the curious
+yellow bag that hangs from it. In pictures this is represented as a
+creel in which the kind pelican carries home the children's breakfast;
+you are allowed to see the tail of a big fish hanging out. But it is not
+a creel; it is a net. The great birds, marshalled in line on some broad
+lake or marsh, and beating the water with their wings, drive the fish
+before them until they have got a dense crowd huddled in panic and
+confusion between them and the shore. Now watch them narrowly. As
+each monstrous bill opens, the thin bones of the lower jaw stretch
+sideways to the breadth of a span by some curious mechanism not
+described in the books, and at the same time the shrunken bag expands
+into a deep, capacious net. Simultaneously the whole instrument is
+plunged into the struggling, silvery mass and comes up full. The side
+bones instantly contract again, and the upper jaw is clapped on them
+like a lid. No wonder the fishermen of the East detest the pelican.
+
+[Illustration: HERE THE COMPETITION HAS BEEN VERY KEEN INDEED.]
+
+[Illustration: AS WONDERFUL AS THE PELICAN, BUT HOW OPPOSITE!]
+
+In the same marsh, perhaps, standing with unequalled grace upon the
+longest legs known in this world, is a troop of giant birds as wonderful
+as the pelican, but how opposite! The beautiful flamingo is a bird of
+feeble intellect, delicate appetite, and genteel tastes. It cannot eat
+fish, for its slender throat would scarcely admit a pea. Besides, the
+idea of catching anything, or even picking up food from the ground, does
+not occur to its simple mind. Its diet consists of certain small
+crustaceans, classed by naturalists with water-fleas, which abound in
+brackish water; and it has an instrument for taking these which it knows
+how to use. I kept flamingos once, and, after trying many things in
+vain, offered them bran, or boiled rice, floating in water. Then they
+dined, and I learned the construction and working of the most marvellous
+of all bills. The lower jaw is deep and hollow, and its upper edges turn
+in to meet each other, so that you may fairly describe it as a pipe
+with a narrow slit along the upper side. In this pipe lies the tongue,
+and it cannot get out, for it is wider than the slit, but it can be
+pressed against the top to close the slit, and then the lower jaw
+becomes an actual pipe. The root of the tongue is furnished on both
+sides with a loose fringe which we will call the first strainer. The
+upper jaw is thin and flat and rests on the lower like a lid, and it is
+beautifully fringed along both sides with small, leathery points, close
+set, like the teeth of a very fine saw. This is the second strainer. To
+work the machine you dip the point into dirty water full of water-fleas,
+draw back the tip of the tongue a little, and suck in water till the
+lower jaw (the pipe) is full, then close the point again with the tip of
+the tongue and force the water out. It can only get out by passing
+through the first strainers at the root of the tongue, then over the
+palate, and so through the second strainers at the sides of the bill;
+and all the solid matter it contained will remain in the mouth. The
+sucking in and squirting out of the water is managed by the cheeks, or
+rather by the cheek, for a flamingo has only one cheek, and that is
+situated under the chin. When the bird is feeding you will see this
+throbbing faster than the eye can follow it, while water squirts from
+the sides of the mouth in a continuous stream. I should have said that
+the whole bill is sharply bent downwards at the middle. The advantage of
+this is that when the bird lets down its head into the water, like a
+bucket into a well, the point of the bill does not stick in the mud, but
+lies flat on it, upside down.
+
+In conclusion, let us not fail to note, whatever be our political creed,
+that, while all the birds pursue their respective industries, there sit
+apart, in pride of place, some whose bills are not tools wherewith to
+work, but weapons wherewith to slay. And these take tribute of the rest,
+not with their consent, but of right.
+
+
+
+
+III
+
+
+TAILS
+
+The secrets of Nature often play like an iridescence on the surface, and
+escape the eye of her worshipper because it is stopped with a
+microscope. There are mysteries all about us as omnipresent as the
+movement of the air that lifts the smoke and stirs the leaves, which I
+cannot find that any philosopher has looked into. Often and deeply have
+I been impressed with this. For example, there is scarcely, in this
+world, a commoner or a humbler thing than a tail, yet how multifarious
+is it in aspect, in construction, and in function, a hundred different
+things and yet one. Some are of feathers and some of hair, and some bare
+and skinny; some are long and some are short, some stick up and some
+hang down, some wag for ever and some are still; the uses that they
+serve cannot be numbered, but one name covers them all. In the course of
+evolution they came in with the fishes and went out with man. What was
+their purpose and mission? What place have they filled in the scheme of
+things? In short, what is the true inwardness of a tail?
+
+If we try to commence--as scientific method requires--with a
+definition, we stumble on a key, at the very threshold, which opens the
+door. For there is no definition of a tail; it is not, in its nature,
+anything at all. When an animal's fore-legs are fitted on to its
+backbone at the proper distance from the hind-legs, if any of the
+backbone remains over, we call it a tail. But it has no purpose; it is a
+mere surplus, which a tailor (the pun is unavoidable) would have trimmed
+off. And, lo! in this very negativeness lies the whole secret of the
+multifarious positiveness of tails. For the absence of special purpose
+is the chance of general usefulness. The ear must fulfil its purpose or
+fail entirely, for it can do nothing else. Eyes, nose and mouth, hands
+and feet, all have their duties; the tail is the unemployed. And if we
+allow that life has had any hand in the shaping of its own destiny, then
+the ingenuity of the devices for turning the useless member to account
+affords one of the most exhilarating subjects of contemplation in the
+whole panorama of Nature. The fishes fitted it up at once as a
+twin-propeller, with results so satisfactory that the whale and the
+porpoise, coming long after, adopted the invention. And be it noted that
+these last and their kin are now the only ocean-going mammals in the
+world. The whole tribe of paddle-steamers, such as seals and walruses
+and dugongs, are only coasters.
+
+Among those beasts that would live on the dry land, the primitive
+kangaroo could think of nothing better to do with his tail than to make
+a stool of it. It was a simple thought, but a happy one. Sitting up
+like a gentleman, he has his hands free to scratch his ribs or twitch
+his moustache. And when he goes he needs not to put them to the ground,
+for his great tail so nearly equals the weight of his body that one pair
+of legs keeps the balance even. And so the kangaroo, almost the lowest
+of beasts, comes closer to man in his postures than any other. The
+squirrel also sits up and uses his forepaws for hands, but the squirrel
+is a sybarite who lies abed in cold weather, and it is every way
+characteristic of him that he has sent his tail to the furrier and had
+it done up into a boa, or comforter, at once warm and becoming. See,
+too, how daintily he lifts it over his back to keep it clean. The rat is
+a near relation of the squirrel zoologically, but personally he is a
+gutter-snipe, and you may know that by one look at the tail which he
+drags after him like a dirty rope. Others of the same family, cleaner,
+though not more ingenious, like the guinea-pig, have simply dispensed
+with the encumbrance; but the rabbit has kept enough to make a white
+cockade, which it hoists when bolting from danger. This is for the
+guidance of the youngsters. Nearly every kind of deer and antelope
+carries the same signal, with which, when fleeing through dusky woods,
+the leader shows the way to the herd and the doe to her fawn.
+
+But of beasts that graze and browse, a large number have turned their
+tails rather to a use which throws a pathetic light on misery of which
+we have little experience. We do, indeed, growl at the gnats of a summer
+evening and think ourselves very ill-used. How little do we know or
+think of the unintermitted and unabated torment that the most harmless
+classes of beasts suffer from the bands of beggars which follow them
+night and day, demanding blood, and will take no refusal. Driven from
+the brow they settle on the neck, shaken from the neck they dive between
+the legs, and but for that far-reaching whisk at the end of the tail,
+they would found a permanent colony on the flanks and defy ejection,
+like the raiders of Vatersay. Darwin argues that the tail-brush may have
+materially helped to secure the survival of those species of beasts that
+possessed it, and no doubt he is right.
+
+The subject is interminable, but we must give a passing glance to some
+quixotic tails. The opossum scampers up a tree, carrying all her
+numerous family on her back, and they do not fall off because each
+infant is securely moored by its own tail to the uplifted tail of its
+mother. The opossum is a very primitive beast, and so early and useful
+an invention should, one would think, have been spread widely in after
+time; but there appears to be some difficulty in developing muscles at
+the thin end of a long tail, for the animals that have turned it into a
+grasping organ are few and are widely scattered. Examples are the
+chameleon among lizards, our own little harvest mouse, and, pre-eminent
+above all, the American monkeys. To a howler, or spider-monkey, its
+long tail is a swing and a trapeze in its forest gymnasium. Humboldt saw
+(he says it) a cluster of them all hanging from a tree by one tail,
+which proceeded from a Sandow in the middle. I should like to see that
+too. It is worth noting, by the way, that no old-world monkey has
+attained to this application of its tail.
+
+Then there is the beaver, whose tail I am convinced is a trowel. I know
+of no naturalist who has mentioned this, but such negative evidence is
+of little weight. The beaver, as everybody knows, is a builder, who cuts
+down trees and piles log upon log until he has raised a solid, domed
+cabin from seven to twenty feet in diameter, which he then plasters over
+with clay and straw. If he does not turn round and beat the work smooth
+with his tail, then I require to know for what purpose he carries that
+broad, heavy, and hard tool behind him.
+
+How few even among lovers of Nature know why a frog has no tail! The
+reason-is simply that it used that organ up when it was in want. In
+early life, as a jolly tadpole, it had a flourishing tail to swim with,
+and gills for breathing water, and an infantile mouth for taking
+vegetable nourishment. But when it began to draw near to frog's estate,
+serious changes were required in its structure to fit it for the life of
+a land animal. Four tiny legs appeared from under its skin, the gills
+gave place to air-breathing lungs, and the infant lips to a great,
+gaping mouth. Now, during this "temporary alteration of the premises"
+all business was of necessity stopped. The half-fish, half-frog could
+neither sup like an infant nor eat like a man. In this extremity it fed
+on its own tail--absorbed it as a camel is said to absorb its hump when
+travelling in the foodless desert--and so it entered on its new life
+without one.
+
+Aeronautics have changed the whole perspective of life for birds, as
+they may for us shortly; so it is no surprise to find that birds have,
+almost with one consent, converted their tails into steering-gear. A
+commonplace bird, like a sparrow, scarcely requires this except as a
+brake when in the act of alighting; but to those birds with which flight
+is an art and an accomplishment, an expansive forked or rounded tail
+(there are two patents) is indispensable. We have shot almost all the
+birds of this sort in our own country, and must travel if we would enjoy
+that enchanting sight--a pair of eagles or a party of kites gone aloft
+for a sail when the wind is rising, like skaters to a pond when the ice
+is bearing. For an hour on end, in restful ease or swift joy, they trace
+ever-varying circles and spirals against the dark storm-cloud, now
+rising, now falling, turning and reversing, but never once flapping
+their widespread pinions.
+
+How is it done? How does the _Shamrock_ sail? Watch, and you will see.
+When the wind is behind, each stiff quill at the end of the wing stands
+out by itself and is caught and driven by the blast; but as the bird
+turns round to face the gale, they all close up and form a continuous
+mainsail, close-hauled. And all the while the expanded tail is in play,
+dipping first at one side and then at the other, and turning the trim
+craft with easy grace "as the governor listeth."
+
+[Illustration: THERE ARE SOME ECCENTRICS, SUCH AS JENNY WREN, WHICH HAVE
+DESPISED THEIR TAILS.]
+
+Besides ground birds, like the quail, there are some eccentrics, such as
+Jenny wren, which have despised their tails, and there are specialists
+also which require them for other purposes than flying. The woodpecker's
+tail is quite useless as a rudder, for he is a woodman and has altered
+and adapted it for a portable stool to rest against as he plies his axe.
+
+But that man must be very blind to the place which birds have taken in
+the progress of civilisation who can suppose it possible that they
+should think only of utility in such a question as the disposal of their
+tails. It is a common notion among those who have acquired some
+smattering of the theory of evolution that fishes developed into
+reptiles, reptiles into birds, and birds into beasts; but this is as
+wrong as it could be. Whatever the genealogy of the beasts may be, they
+certainly were not evolved from birds, and are in many respects not
+above them but below them. These are two independent branches of the
+tree of living forms, as the Greeks and Romans were branches of the
+stock of Japheth. The beasts may stand for the conquering Romans if you
+like, but the birds are the Greeks, and have advanced far beyond them in
+all emotional and artistic sensibility. They worship in the temple of
+music and beauty. And, like ourselves, they have found no subject so
+worthy of the highest efforts of art as their own dress. But the
+clothing of the body must conform more or less to the figure, and so,
+for a field in which invention and fancy may sport untrammelled, a lady
+turns to her hat and a bird to its tail. And by both, with equal
+heroism, every consideration of mere comfort, convenience, health, or
+safety is swept aside in obedience to the higher aim. Is this only a
+flippant jocularity, or is there here in very truth some profound law of
+the mind revealing itself in spheres seemingly so disconnected?
+
+Look at a peacock. Its train, by the way, is a false tail, like the
+chignon of twenty years ago, or the fringe of the present day; the true
+tail is under it, and serves no purpose but to support it. Now the
+peacock lives on the ground, among scrub and brushwood, haunted by
+jackals and wild cats. They, like soldiers in khaki, reconnoitre him in
+a uniform expressly designed to elude the eye, but he flaunts a flag
+resplendent with green and gold. And when his one chance of life lies in
+springing nimbly from the ground and committing himself to his strong
+wings, he must lift and carry this ponderous paraphernalia with him. And
+the terrible Bonelli's eagle is soaring above. But all is risked proudly
+for the sake of the morning hour in the glade where the ladies assemble.
+And the peacock is only one of many. Not to mention the lyre bird, the
+Argus pheasant, the bird of paradise, and other splendid examples, there
+are common dicky-birds which point the moral and adorn the tail as
+emphatically.
+
+If the tail is a rudder, where should you look to find it in its most
+simple and efficient form but among the flycatchers, which make their
+living by aerial acrobatics after flies? Yet this family seems to be
+peculiarly prone to the vanity of a stylish tail. The paradise
+flycatcher flutters two streamers a foot long, like white ribbons,
+behind it. The fantail could hide behind its own fan. The bee-eater has
+the two central feathers prolonged and pointed. The drongos, which are
+flycatchers in habit, wear their tails very long and deeply forked; and
+one of them, the racket-tailed drongo, has the two side feathers
+extended beyond the rest for nearly a foot, and as thin as wires,
+expanding into a blade at the ends. I have seen nothing in ladies' hats
+more preposterous. It is vain to object that there can be no proper
+comparison between tails and hats because the woman chooses her own hat
+while the bird has to wear what Nature has given it. I know that, but
+the contention is utterly superficial. What choice has a woman as to the
+style of her hat? Fashion prescribes for her, and Nature for the birds;
+that is all the difference. No doubt she acquiesces when theoretically
+she might rebel. The bird cannot rebel, but does it not acquiesce? Does
+a lyre bird submit to its tail--wear it under protest, so to speak?
+Believe me, every bird that has an aesthetic tail knows the fact, and
+tries to live up to it. We may push the argument even further, for the
+motmot of Brazil is not content with a ready-made tail, but actually
+strips the web off the two long side feathers with its own beak, except
+a little patch at the end, so as to get the pattern which Nature, if one
+must use the phrase, gave to the racket-tailed drongo. A specimen is
+exhibited in the hall of the South Kensington Museum.
+
+[Illustration: A BLACKBIRD AND A STARLING--THE ONE LIFTS ITS SKIRTS,
+WHILE THE OTHER WEARS A WALKING DRESS.]
+
+In this connection I may also say that the shape or colour of a tail is
+not everything. An observant eye may find much to note in the wearing of
+them. There is a stylish way of carrying a tail and a slovenly way, and
+there are coquettish arts for the display of recherche tails. A
+blackbird and a starling are both tidy birds, and both walk much on the
+ground, but the one lifts its skirts, while the other, more practical
+and less fashionable, wears a walking dress and saves itself trouble.
+
+This line of observation leads to a higher, and reveals the most
+important purpose that tails have served in the economy of beast, bird,
+and reptile, and, perhaps, even cold-blooded fish. Before the godlike
+countenance of man appeared on the earth, with its contractile forehead
+and erectile eyebrows, the answering light of the eye, the expansive
+nostrils, and subtilely mobile lips; before that the tail was the prime
+vehicle of emotion and safety-valve of passion. It is a great truth, too
+often buried in these days under rubbish of materialistic theories, that
+some way of self-manifestation is a supreme necessity of all sentient
+life. From the hot centre of thought and feeling the currents rush along
+the nervous ways and pervade the whole frame, seeking an outlet. But
+many passages are barred by duty, or fear, or eager purpose. A strong
+gust of passion may burst all barriers and force its way out at every
+point, but gentle currents flow along the lines of least resistance and
+find the idle tail. I do not know a better illustration of this than a
+cat watching a mouse. The ears are pricked forward, the eyes are fixed
+on the unsuspecting victim, every muscle of the legs is tense, like a
+bent bow ready to speed the arrow on its way. But see, the excitement
+with which the whole body is charged cannot be wholly restrained, and
+oozes out at the point of the tail.
+
+[Illustration: AT THE SIGHT OF A RIVAL THE DOG HOLDS ITS TAIL UP
+STIFFLY]
+
+Every emotion and passion takes this course. The happy kid wags its tail
+as it runs to its mother, the donkey when it has executed a successful
+bray, and the dog when it sees its master. At the sight of a rival the
+dog holds its tail up stiffly, unless, indeed, the rival is a bigger dog
+than itself, in which case the index goes down quickly between the legs.
+An elated horse elevates its tail, and so does a duck in the same mood.
+A lizard preparing to fight another lizard
+
+ Swinges the scaly horror of his folded tail,
+
+and the raging lion of fiction lashes its sides with the same nervous
+instrument.
+
+It would be tedious to dwell on the pretty part which the tail plays in
+the courtships of sparrows and pigeons, or on the sprightly attitudes by
+which birds of all sorts let off their spirits when shower and sunshine
+have overfilled their hearts with gladness. But birds twitch their tails
+constantly, without meaning anything by it. The ceaseless wagging of a
+wagtail is a mere habit of cheerfulness, like the twirling of her thumbs
+by an idle Scotswoman. The long tail is there and something must be done
+with it. Look at the embarrassment which a nervous young man shows about
+the disposal of his hands; how he thrusts them into his trouser pockets,
+hangs them by their thumbs from the arm-holes of his waistcoat, or gives
+them a walking-stick to play with. I like to imagine what such a fellow
+would do with a long tail if he had it--how he would wind it round each
+leg in turn, rub up his back hair, and describe figures on the floor.
+But no animal so self-conscious as man could bear up long under the
+nervous strain of having to think continually of its tail. It would die
+young and the race would become extinct. Perhaps it did.
+
+A final word on the conclusion of the whole matter, for these
+reflections have a moral. As habit becomes character, so expression
+hardens into feature. The tail of a sheep grows downwards, but that of a
+goat upwards, and this is the only infallible outward mark of
+distinction between the two animals. But it is the permanent record of a
+long history. The sheep was never anything but sheepish; the goat and
+its forefathers were pert as kids and insolent when their beards grew.
+It is useless to inquire why insolence should express itself by an
+upturned tail until someone can advance a reason why it should express
+itself in another way.
+
+For proof of the fact you need go no farther than your own dogs. The
+ancestral wolf, or jackal, hunting and fighting, fearing and hoping,
+showed every changing mood by the pose of its tail; but a change came
+when it acquired an assured position of security and importance as the
+chosen companion of man, so dreaded by all its kith and kin. The tail
+went up at once and stayed there; when it could go no higher, it curled
+over. But promotion breeds conceit only in base natures. The greyhound
+is a gentleman, respectful and self-respecting, and it shows that by the
+very carriage of its tail. Only a snob at heart, petted and pampered for
+many generations, could have produced that perfect incarnation of smug
+self-satisfaction, the pug. Let us take the lesson home. The thoughts on
+which we let our minds dwell, and the sentiments that we harbour in our
+hearts, are the chisels with which we are carving out our faces and
+those of our children's children.
+
+
+
+
+IV
+
+
+NOSES
+
+Some may think that I have chosen a trivial subject, and they will look
+for frivolous treatment of it. I can only hope that they will be
+disappointed. There is nothing that the progress of science has taught
+us more emphatically than this--that we must call nothing insignificant.
+Seemingly trivial pursuits have led to discoveries which have benefited
+all mankind, and priceless truths have been dug out of the most
+unpromising mines. I am not insinuating that anyone's nose is an
+unpromising mine, but I say that I am persuaded there is wisdom hidden
+in that organ for him who will observingly distil it out.
+
+[Illustration: A SHREW CAN DO IT, BUT NOT A MAN.]
+
+It possesses a peculiar and mystical significance not shared by any
+other feature. This is abundantly proved by common speech, which is one
+of the most trustworthy of all kinds of evidence. For example, we speak
+of a person turning up his nose at a good offer. The phrase is absurd,
+for the power of turning up his nose is one which no human being ever
+possessed. A shrew can do it, but not a man. Yet the meaning of the
+saying needs no interpretation. Akin to it is the classical phrase,
+_adunco suspendere naso_. What Horace means scarcely requires
+explanation, but no commentator has successfully explained it. These
+expressions well illustrate the mystery that enshrouds our most salient
+feature. They show that, while everybody can see that disdain is
+expressed through the nose, nobody can define how it is done. Then there
+is that curious expression "put his nose out of joint," which is quite
+inexplicable, the nose being destitute of joint. There are many other
+phrases and also gestures which point in the same direction, but need
+not be cited, being for the most part vulgar. Allusions to the nose have
+a tendency to be vulgar, which is another mystery inciting us to
+investigate it. So let us proceed.
+
+The first thing required by the principles of scientific precedure is a
+definition. What is a nose? But this proves to be a much more difficult
+question than anyone would suspect before he tried to answer it. The
+individual human nose we can recognise, describe or sketch more easily
+than any other feature, but try to define the thing _nose_ in Nature and
+it is a most elusive phenomenon. When we speak of a man being led by the
+nose we imply that it is a part of him which is prominent and situated
+in front, when we speak of keeping one's nose above water we refer to it
+as the breathing orifice, but when we say that this or that offends our
+nose we are regarding it as the seat of the sense of smell. I believe
+that all these three ideas must be included in any definition. It should
+follow that insects, which breathe through holes in their sides, cannot
+have noses, and this is the truth.
+
+Fishes, too, though they may have snouts, have not noses, because they
+breathe by gills. In truth, it seems that the nose was a very late and
+high acquisition, almost the finishing touch of the perfected animal
+form. And incidentally this leads us to notice what a great step was
+taken in evolution when the breathing holes were brought up to the
+region of the mouth. For the sense of taste is necessarily situated in
+the mouth, and the sense of smell is in close alliance with it. The
+mouth tastes food dissolved in the saliva during the process of
+mastication, and the primary use of the sense of smell is to detect and
+analyse beforehand the small particles given off by food and floating in
+the atmosphere.
+
+A good many years ago, when the late Sally chimpanzee was the darling of
+the Zoological Gardens in Regent's Park, I watched her eating dates. She
+was an epicure, and always peeled each date delicately with her
+preposterous lips before eating it, and during the process she would
+apply the date to her nose every second to test its quality or enjoy its
+aroma. The action was indescribably comical, but what would it have been
+if her nostrils had been situated among her ribs? Imagine a mantis, for
+example, as he chews up a fly, lifting one of his wings and applying it
+to his flanks to see if it smells gamey. That is where some naturalists
+believe that the sense of smell is situated in insects. Others, however,
+think, with reason, that it is in the antennae or mouth. Nobody knows;
+the senses of the lower animals seem to be stuck about all parts of the
+body.
+
+But, even if the sense of smell is at the mouth, how limited must its
+usefulness be when it can only deal with substances that are held to it!
+A new era dawned when the passages by which the breath of life
+unceasingly comes and goes were transferred to the region of the mouth
+also. The nerves of smell quickly spread themselves over the lining
+membrane of those passages and became warders of the gate, challenging
+every waft of air that entered the body and examining what it carried.
+Thenceforth this region comprising the mouth, nostrils and surrounding
+parts holds a new and high place in the economy of the body, for the
+headquarters of the intelligence department are located there, and all
+the faculties of the brain converge on that point. Of course, the eyes
+and ears claim a share, but they are not far off.
+
+Now it is being recognised more and more clearly by medical and
+physiological science that when the mind is much directed to any part of
+the body it exercises an influence in some way not understood on the
+flow of blood to that part to a degree which may seriously affect its
+functions and even its growth. When a person is suffering from any
+nervous affection, from heart disease, or even from weakness of the
+eyes, it is of the utmost importance to keep him from knowing it if
+possible, for if he knows it he will think about it, and that will
+inevitably aggravate it. This principle is well recognised in systems of
+physical culture. And surely it is impossible that so much intelligence
+should pass through that one sensitive region of the body which we are
+considering without affecting its growth and structure. Every muscle in
+it becomes quick to respond to various sensations in different ways,
+till the very recollection of those sensations will excite the same
+response.
+
+Nay, we may go further. The mental emotions excited by those sensations
+will be expressed in the same way. For example, the sense of smell is
+peculiarly effective in exciting disgust. Anything which does violence
+to the sense of hearing exasperates, but does not disgust. If a man
+practises the accordion all day in the next room you do not loathe him,
+you only want to kill him. But anything that stinks excites pure
+disgust. Here you have the key to the fact that disgust and all feelings
+akin to it, disdain, contempt and scorn, express themselves through the
+nose. Darwin says that when we think of anything base or vile in a man's
+character the expression of the face is the same "as if we smelled a bad
+smell." This is an example of the temporary expression of a passing
+emotion, and there are many others like it. But each of us has his
+prevailing and dominant emotions which constitute the habitual
+attitude of his mind. And by the habitual indulgence of any emotion the
+features will become habituated to the expression of it, and so the set
+of our features comes at last to express our prevailing and dominant
+emotions; in other words, our _character_.
+
+[Illustration: THE NOSTRILS OF THE APTERYX ARE AT THE TIP OF ITS BEAK.]
+
+But let us return to the evolution of the nose. In these days of
+universal "Nature study" nobody need be told that the practice of
+breathing through the nostrils was introduced by the amphibians and
+reptiles. The former (frogs and toads) take to it only when they come of
+age, but lizards, snakes and all other reptiles do it from infancy. But
+the nose is not yet. That is something too delicate to come out of a
+cold-blooded snout covered with hard scales. Birds, too, by having their
+mouth parts encased in a horny bill seem to be debarred from wearing
+noses. And yet there is one primeval fowl, most ancient of all the
+feathered families, which has come near it. I mean the apteryx, that
+eccentric, wingless recluse which hides itself in the scrub jungles of
+New Zealand. Its nostrils, unlike those of every other bird, are at the
+tip of its beak, which is swollen and sensitive; and Dr. Buller says
+that as it wanders about in the night it makes a continual sniffing and
+softly taps the walls of its cage with the point of its bill. But the
+apteryx is one of those odd geniuses which come into the world too soon,
+and perish ineffectual. Its kindred are all extinct, and so will it be
+ere long.
+
+[Illustration: A BOLD ATTEMPT TO GROW IN THE CASE OF A TAPIR]
+
+When we come to the beasts we find the right conditions at last for the
+growth of the nose. Take the horse for an example of the average beast
+without idiosyncrasy. Its profile is nearly a straight line from the
+crown to the nostrils, beyond which it slopes downwards to the lips. The
+skin of this part is soft and smooth, without hair, and the horse dearly
+loves to have it fondled. The sense of touch is evidently uppermost. At
+this stage there was what to the eye of fancy looks like a bold attempt
+to grow a nose in the case of a tapir, but it miscarried. These hoofed
+beasts are all very hard up for something in the way of a hand to bring
+their food to their mouths. The camel employs its lips and the cow its
+tongue; the muntjae or barking deer of India has attained a tongue of
+such length that it uses it for a handkerchief to wipe its eyes. So the
+tapir could not resist the temptation to misapply its nose to the
+purpose of gathering fodder, and the ultimate result was the elephant,
+whose nose is a wonderful hand and a bucket and other things. The pig,
+being a swine, debased its nose in a worse way, making a grubbing tool
+of it.
+
+There has been another attempt to misuse and pervert this part of the
+face which I scarcely dare to touch upon, for it is so utterly fantastic
+and mystical that I fear the charge of heresy if I give words to my
+thoughts. It occurs among bats, a tribe of obscure creatures about which
+common knowledge amounts to this, that they fly about after sunset, are
+uncanny, and fond of getting entangled in the hair of ladies, and should
+be killed. But there are certain families of bats, named horseshoe bats,
+leaf-nosed bats and vampires about which common knowledge is _nil_, and
+the knowledge possessed by naturalists very little, so I will tell what
+I know of them. They are larger than common bats, their wings are broad,
+soft and silent, like those of the owl, they sleep in caves, tombs and
+ruins, they do not flutter in the open air, but swiftly traverse gloomy
+avenues and shady glades, their prey is not gnats and midges, but the
+"droning beetle," the death's head moth, the cockchafer, croaking frogs,
+sleeping birds and _human blood_. The books will tell you that these
+bats are distinguished by "complicated nasal appendages consisting of
+foliaceous skin processes around the nostrils," which is quite true and
+utterly futile. It may do for a dried skin or a specimen in spirits of
+wine. I have had the foul fiend in a cage and looked him in the face.
+His whole countenance, from lips to brow and from cheek to cheek, is
+covered and hidden by a hideous design of
+
+ Spells and signs,
+ Symbolic letters, circles, lines,
+
+sculptured in living, quivering skin. It is a sight to make the flesh
+creep. The books suggest that these foliaceous appendages are the organs
+of some special sense akin to touch. Futile again! There are things in
+Nature still which prompt the naturalist who has not atrophied his inner
+eye and starved his imagination to cry out:
+
+ Science ...
+ Why preyest thou thus upon the poet's heart,
+ Vulture, whose wings are dull realities?
+
+Supposing there should be in the unseen universe an evil spirit, an imp
+of malice and mischief, not Milton's Satan, but the Deil of Burns:
+
+ Whyles ranging, like a roaring lion,
+ For prey, a' holes an' corners tryin;
+ Whyles on the strong-winged tempest flyin,
+ Tirlin the kirks;
+ Whyles in the human bosom pryin,
+
+and supposing him to crave possession of a body through which he might
+get into touch with this material world and express himself in outward
+forms and motions; then oh! how fitly were this bat explained.
+
+But let us go back to firm ground. If you compare a dog's profile with
+that of a horse you will note at once that the nostrils are in advance
+of the lips, and have a kind of portal to themselves. This is a distinct
+advance. The sense of smell has come to the front and pushed aside the
+lower sense of touch. You will observe, too, that with the growth of the
+brain the brain-pan has elevated itself above the level of the nose.
+Through the cat to the monkeys the process proceeds, the forehead
+advancing, the jaws retreating, and the nostrils leaving the lips, until
+they finally settle in a detached villa midway between the eyes and the
+mouth. This is the nose. I do not know the use of it. I cannot fathom
+the meaning of it. It is a solemn mystery. See the face of an
+orang-outang. It is a _countenance_, a signboard with three distinct
+lines of writing on it, the eyes, the nose and the mouth. You may not
+think much of this particular nose. Neither do I. I think it is
+situated rather too near the eyes and too far from the mouth. It is a
+little too small also, and wants style. But you must not judge a first
+attempt too critically. I have seen human noses of a pattern not unlike
+this, but they are not considered aristocratic: perhaps they indicate a
+reversion to the ancestral type.
+
+[Illustration: I HAVE SEEN HUMAN NOSES OF A PATTERN NOT UNLIKE THIS, BUT
+THEY ARE NOT CONSIDERED ARISTOCRATIC.]
+
+But the noses even of monkeys are not all like this. In fact, there is a
+good deal of variety, and two in particular have struck me as quite
+remarkable. One is that of the long-nosed monkey (_Semnopithecus
+nasalis_). I think it must have suggested Sterne's stranger on a mule,
+who had travelled to the promontory of noses and threw all Strassburg
+into a ferment. I have often contemplated this nose in mute wonderment,
+and longed to see that monkey in life, if so be I might arrive at some
+understanding of it; for the taxidermist cannot rise above his own
+level, and the man who would mount _S. nasalis_ would need to be a Henry
+Irving. Then there is the sub-nosed monkey, labelled _rhinopithecus_, of
+which there is an expressive specimen at the South Kensington Museum.
+Who can consider that nose seriously and continue to believe in a
+recipe made up of struggle for existence, adaptation to environment, and
+natural selection _quantum suf_.? If I could dine with that monkey, ask
+it to drink a glass of wine with me, offer it a pinch of snuff and so
+on, I might come in time to feel, if not to comprehend, the import of
+its nose.
+
+[Illustration: THE LONG-NOSED MONKEY.]
+
+[Illustration: WHO CAN CONSIDER THAT NOSE SERIOUSLY?]
+
+But one step further is required for the evolution of what we may call
+the human nose, and that is a solid foundation, a ridge of bone
+connecting it with the brow and separating the eyes from each other. I
+believe that the completeness of this is a fair index of the comparative
+advancement of different races of men. In the Greek ideal of a perfect
+face the profile forms a straight line from the top of the forehead to
+the tip of the nose. This is the type of face which painters have
+delighted to give to the Virgin Mary; and, when looking at their
+Madonnas, one cannot help wondering whether they forgot that Mary was a
+Jewess. According to the Hebrew ideal, a perfect nose was like "the
+tower of Lebanon which looketh toward Damascus" (Song of Solomon, vii.
+4); but not even the ruins of that tower remain to help us to-day. The
+Romans, no doubt, accepted the ideal of the Greeks aesthetically, but
+their destiny had given them a very different nose, and they ruled the
+world.
+
+Here is the nose of Julius Caesar as a coin has preserved it for us. I
+think that the outline is too straight for a typical Roman, but the deep
+dip under the brow and the downward point are characteristic. Now
+compare the nose of another race which rules an empire greater than that
+of the Caesars. Here is John Bull as _Punch_ usually represents him. It
+belongs to the same genus as that of the Roman. The reason why this
+should be the nose of command is not easy to give with scientific
+precision, for we are dealing with the play of very subtle influences,
+so the man without imagination will no doubt scoff. But I will take
+shelter under Darwin. Dealing with the expression of pride he says, "A
+proud man exhibits his sense of superiority by holding his head and body
+erect. He is haughty _(haut),_ or high, and makes himself appear as
+large as possible." Again, "The arrogant man looks down on others"; and
+yet again, "In some photographs of patients affected by a monomania of
+pride, sent me by Dr. Crichton-Browne, the head and body were held erect
+and the mouth firmly closed. This latter action, expressive of decision,
+follows, I presume, from the proud man feeling perfect self-confidence
+in himself."
+
+Darwin says nothing about the nose, but I believe that, by physiological
+sympathy, it cannot but take part in the habitual downward look upon
+inferior beings. Darwin goes on to say that, "The whole expression of
+pride stands in direct antithesis to that of humility"; from which it
+follows, if my philosophy is sound, that the nose of Uriah Heep was
+turned upwards.
+
+Of course, many emotions may share in the moulding of a nose, and the
+whole subject is too intricate and vast to be treated briefly. I have
+only given a few examples to illustrate my argument, and my conclusion
+is that the key to the peculiar significance and personal quality of the
+nose is to be found in its _immobility_. The eyes and lips are
+incessantly in motion, we can twitch and wrinkle the cheeks and
+forehead, and muscles to move the ears are there, though most men have
+lost control of them. But the nose stands out like some bold promontory
+on a level coast, or like the Sphinx in the Egyptian desert, with an
+ancient history, no doubt, and a mystery perhaps, but without response
+to any appeal. And for this very reason it is an index, not to that
+which is transient in the man, but to that which is permanent. He may
+knit his brows to seem thoughtful and profound, or compress his lips to
+persuade his friends and himself that he has a strong will, but he can
+play no trick with his nose. There it stands, an incorruptible witness,
+testifying to what he is, and not only to what he is, but to the rock
+whence he was hewn and to the pit whence he was digged. For his nose is
+a bequest from his ancestors, an entailed estate which he cannot
+alienate.
+
+
+
+
+V
+
+
+EARS
+
+Men and women have ears, and so have jugs and pitchers. In the latter
+case they are useful: jugs and pitchers are lifted by them. And what is
+useful is fit, and fitness is the first condition of beauty. But human
+ears are put to no use, except sometimes when naughty little boys are
+lifted by them in the way of discipline; and I can see no beauty in
+them. It is only because they are so common that we do not notice how
+ridiculous they are. In the days of Charles I. men sometimes had their
+ears cut off for holding wrong opinions, which would have made them
+famous and popular in these enlightened days, but at that time it made
+all right-thinking people despise them, so the fashion of going without
+ears did not spread among us. If it had, then how differently we should
+all think of the matter now! If we were all accustomed to neat, round
+heads at drawing-rooms, levees and balls, how repulsive it Would be to
+see a well-dressed man with two ridiculous, wrinkled appendages sticking
+out from the sides of his face!
+
+In saying this I am not drawing on my fancy, but on my memory. I can
+recollect the time when no gentleman, still less any lady, would have
+owned a terrier with its ears on. And why go back so far? The same
+sentiment is prevalent in good society with respect to men's beards in
+this year of grace and smooth faces. Yet, if one chance to be looking at
+a Rembrandt instead of at society, what an infinitely handsomer adjunct
+to a noble face is a fine beard than a pair of ears!
+
+When woman first looked at her face in a polished saucepan, she was at
+once struck with the comicality of those things, and bethought herself
+what to do with them. She decided to use them for pegs to hang ornaments
+on. The improvement excited the admiration of her husband and the envy
+of her rivals to such a degree that all other women of taste in her
+tribe did the same, and from that day to this, in almost every country
+in the world, it has been accounted a shame for any respectable woman to
+show her face in public in the hideousness of naked ears. This discovery
+of its capabilities gave a new value to the ear, and a large, roomy one
+became an asset in the marriage market. I have seen a pretty little
+damsel of Sind with fourteen jingling silver things hanging at regular
+intervals from the outside edge of each ear. If Nature had been
+niggardly, the lobe at least could be enlarged by boring it and
+thrusting in a small wooden peg, then a larger one, and so on until it
+could hold an ivory wheel as large as a quoit, and hung down to the
+shoulders.
+
+But Nature surely did not intend the ear for this purpose. Then what
+did she intend? A popular error is that the ears are given to hear with,
+but the ears cannot hear. The hearing is done by a box of assorted
+instruments (_malleus, incus, stapes_, etc.) hidden in a burrow which
+has its entrance inside of the ear. If you argue that the ears are
+intended to catch sounds and direct them down to the hearing instrument,
+then explain their absurd shape. They are useless. A man who wants to
+hear distinctly puts his hand to his ear. And why do they not turn to
+meet the sounds that come from different quarters? They are absolutely
+immovable, and therefore also expressionless. A savage expresses his
+mind with all the rest of his face; he smiles and grins and pouts and
+frowns, but his ears stand like gravestones with the inscriptions
+effaced. How different is the case when you turn from man to the
+"irrational" animals! The eyes of a fawn are lustrous and beautiful, but
+they would be as meaningless as polished stones without the eloquent
+ears that stand behind them and tell her thoughts. Curiosity, suspicion,
+alarm, anger, submission, friendliness, every emotion that flits across
+her quick, sensitive mind speaks through them. They are in touch with
+her soul, and half the music of her life is played on them. And if you
+abstract yourself from individuals and look at that thing, the ear, in
+the wide field of life, what a great, living reality it is!--a spiritual
+unity under infinite diversity of material form and fashion. It is like
+the telegraph wire overhead, the commonest and plainest of material
+things, but charged with the silent and invisible currents of the life
+of the world.
+
+"Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore."
+
+[Illustration: OR PERHAPS WHEN IT WANTS TO LISTEN IT RAISES A FLIPPER TO
+ITS EAR.]
+
+Birds have no ears, nor have crocodiles, nor frogs, nor snakes. Ears
+seem to be for beasts only. And not for all beasts. Seals are divided by
+naturalists into two great families--those with ears, and those without.
+The common seal belongs to the latter class, and the sea-lion to the
+former. A common seal lives in the sea, and when it does wriggle up on
+the beach of an iceberg there is nothing to hear, I suppose, or perhaps
+when it wants to listen it raises a flipper to its ear. I never saw one
+doing so, but we do not see everything that happens in the world. The
+sea-lion, with its stouter limbs, can lift its forepart, raise its head
+and look about it, and even flop about the ice-fields at a respectable
+rate. And there is no doubt that one of these is as much above an
+earless seal as fifty years of Europe are better than a cycle of Cathay.
+When performing seals are exhibited at a circus sitting on chairs,
+catching balls on the points of their noses and playing diabolo with
+them, or balancing billiard cues on their snouts, and doing other
+miraculous things, they are always sea-lions, not common seals. Of
+course, I do not mean to insinuate that sea-lions invented the ear and
+stuck it on: that would be unscientific; but I mean that their general
+intelligence and interest in affairs created that demand for more
+distinct hearing which led to the development of an ear trumpet. This
+view is wholly scientific, though pedants may quarrel with my way of
+putting it.
+
+The sea-lion's ears are very minute, mere apologies one might think; but
+don't be hasty. The finny prey of the sea-lion makes no sound as it
+skims through the water; and perhaps the padded foot of that stealthy
+garrotter, the Polar bear, makes as little on the smooth ice; for
+catching the one and not being caught by the other the sea-lion must
+trust to the keenness of its great goggle eyes. But it is a social
+beast, and it wants to catch the bellowing of its fellows far across
+the foggy waste of ice-floes; and that little leather scoop standing
+behind the ear-hole seems to be just the instrument required to catch
+and send down those sounds which would otherwise glance off the glossy
+fur and never find entrance to the tiny orifice at all. If it were any
+larger than is absolutely necessary it would be a serious impediment to
+a professional diver and swimmer like the sea-lion. This is the reason
+why otters have very small ears, and why whales and porpoises have none
+at all.
+
+But when a beast lives on land the conditions are all altered, and then
+the ear blossoms out into an infinite variety of forms and sizes, from
+each of which the true naturalist may divine the manner of life of its
+wearer as surely as the palmist tells your past, present and future from
+the lines on your hand. First, he will divide all beasts into those that
+pursue and those that flee, oppressors and oppressed. The former point
+their ears forwards, but the latter backwards. There may be a good deal
+of free play in both cases, but I am thinking of the habitual position.
+When a cat is making its felonious way along the garden wall, wrapped in
+thoughts of blackbirds and thrushes, its ears look straight forwards,
+and this is the way in which a cat's portrait is always taken, because
+it is characteristic, It cannot turn them round to catch sounds from
+behind, and would scorn to do so; when accosted from behind, it turns
+its head and looks danger in the face. It can fold them down backwards
+when the danger is a terrier and the decks are cleared for action, but
+that is another story. Contrast Brer Rabbit as he comes "lopin' up de
+big road," His ears are turning every way scouting for danger, not
+always in unison, but independently; but when he is at rest they are set
+to alarm from the flank and rear.
+
+[Illustration: "TEAR OUT THE HOUSE LIKE THE DOGS WUZ ATTER HIM."]
+
+But when he "tear out the house like the dogs wuz atter him," then they
+point straight back. He was made to be eaten, and he knows it. So it is
+with the whole tribe of deer, and even with the horse, pampered and
+cared for and unacquainted with danger; his ears are a weathercock
+registering the drift of all his petty hopes and fears. I see the left
+ear go forward and prepare for a desperate shy at that wheelbarrow. He
+knows a wheelbarrow familiarly--there is one in his stall all day--but I
+am taking him a road he does not want to go, and so the hypocrite is
+going to pretend that barrow is of a dangerous sort. I prepare to apply
+a counter-irritant: he sees it with the corner of his eye, and both ears
+turn back like a tuning-fork.
+
+The size and quality of the ear serve to show how far the owner depends
+on it. You will never begin to understand Nature until you see clearly
+that every life is dominated by two supreme anxieties which push aside
+all other concerns--viz., to eat, and not to be eaten. The one is
+uppermost in those that pursue, and the other in those that flee. Now if
+the pursuer fails he loses a dinner, but if the fugitive fails he loses
+his life, from which it follows that the very best sort of ears will be
+found among those beasts that do not ravage but run.
+
+But there is another matter to be taken into account. The ears are not
+the whole of the beast's outfit. It has eyes, and it has a nose. Which
+of the three it most relies on depends upon the manner of its life. A
+bird lives in trees or the air, looking down at the prowling cat or up
+at the hawk hovering in the clear sky; so it does not keep ears, and its
+nose is of no account. But what four-footed thing can see like a bird?
+The squirrel also lives in the trees, and its ears are frivolously
+decorated with tufts of hair. You will not find many beasts that can
+afford to prostitute their ears to ornamental purposes. The only other
+beast that I can think of at this moment which has tufted ears is the
+lynx. Now the lynx is a tree cat, and there is proverbial wisdom in the
+saying "Eyes like a lynx."
+
+[Illustration: A GREAT CATHOLIC CONGRESS OF DISTINGUISHED EARS.]
+
+But go to the timid beasts that spend their lives on the ground among
+grass and brushwood and woods and coppices, where murderous foes are
+prowling unseen, and you will see ears indeed--expansive, tremulous,
+turning lightly on well-oiled pivots, and catching, like large
+sea-shells, the mingled murmur of rustling leaves and snapping twigs and
+chirping insects and falling seeds, and the slight, occasional, abrupt,
+fateful sound which is none of these. It is impossible, no doubt, for us
+ever to think ourselves into the life which these beasts live--moving,
+thinking and sleeping in a circumambient atmosphere of never-ceasing
+sound; sitting, as it were, at the receiving station of a system of
+wireless telegraphy, and catching cross-currents of floating
+intelligence from all quarters, mostly undiscernible by us if we
+listened for it, but which they, by long practice, instantly locate and
+interpret without conscious effort.
+
+The zoologist classifies them under many heads. The field mouse and
+rabbits are rodentia, the deer ungulata, the kangaroos marsupialia. In
+my museum they are all one family, and their labels are their ears. In
+these days of international conferences, parliaments of religion,
+pan-everything-in-turn councils, might we not arrange for a great
+catholic congress of distinguished ears? What a glow of new life it
+would shed upon our straitened, traditional ways of thinking about the
+social problems of our humble fellow-creatures! I would exclude the
+eared owls, whose ears are a mere sport of fashion, like the hideous
+imitations of birds' wings which ladies stick on their hats.
+
+But just when this peep into the rare show of Nature is lifting my soul
+into sublimity, I am brought down to the base earth again by an
+exception. This is the plague of all high science. You design a stately
+theory, collect from many quarters a wealth of facts to establish it
+with, and have arranged them with cumulative and irresistible force,
+when some disgusting, uninvited case thrusts itself in on your notice
+and refuses to fit into your argument at all. In this instance it is
+"my lord the elephant." That he has no need to concern himself about any
+bloodthirsty beast that may be lurking in the jungle is not more obvious
+than that his ears are the biggest in the world. Now there are two ways
+of getting rid of an obstruction of this kind. One is to betake yourself
+to your thinking chair and pipe and to rake up the possibilities of the
+Pleiocene and Meiocene ages, and prove that when the immense ear of the
+elephant was evolved there must have been some carnivorous monster, some
+sabre-toothed tiger or cave bear, which preyed on elephants.
+
+The other way is to get acquainted with the elephant, cultivate an
+intimacy with him, and find out what his ears are to him. I prefer the
+second way. I would patiently watch him as he stands drowsily under an
+umbrageous banian tree on a sultry day before the monsoon has burst and
+refreshed earth and air. So might I note that his ears are incessantly
+moving, but not turning this way and that to catch sounds--just
+flapping, flapping, as if to cool his great temples. So have I seen the
+gigantic fruit bats, called flying foxes in India, hanging in hundreds
+in the upper branches of a tall peepul tree at noon, feeling too hot to
+sleep, and all fanning themselves in unison with one wing--a comic
+spectacle. And at each flap of the elephant's ears I would observe that
+a cloud of flies (for the elephant is not too great to be pestered by
+the despicable hordes of beggars for blood) were dislodged from their
+feeding grounds about his head and neck, and, trying to settle about his
+rear parts, were driven back again by the swinging of his tail. Then I
+should say that ear is just a fan. How significant it is that among the
+emblems of royalty in the East the three chiefest are an
+umbrella-bearer, two men who stand behind and swing great punkahs
+modelled on the elephant's ear, and two others carrying yak's tails
+wherewith to scare the flies from the royal person! The elephant is a
+rajah!
+
+There is another mysterious ear which is a stumbling-block to the simple
+theory-monger. It is in fashion among a tribe of bats to which belongs
+the so-called vampire of India. This monster is fond of coming into your
+bedroom at midnight through the open windows, but not to suck your
+blood, for it has little in common with the true vampire of South
+America. It brings its dinner with it and hangs from the ceiling,
+"feeding like horses when you hear them feed." You hear its jaws
+working--crunch, crunch, crunch, but feel too drowsy to get up and expel
+it.
+
+When you get up in the morning there on your clean dressing table, just
+below the place where it hung, are the bloody remains of a sparrow, or
+the crumbs of a tree-frog. The servants will tell you that the sparrow
+was killed and eaten by a rat, but if you rise softly next night when
+you hear the sound of feeding, and shut the windows, you will find a
+goblin hanging from the ceiling in the morning, hideous beyond the
+power of words to tell. Its ears, thin, membranous and longer than its
+head, tremble incessantly. Inside of them is another pair, much smaller
+than the first, and tuned to their octave, I should guess, while two
+membranous smelling trumpets of similar pattern rise over the nose. What
+is the meaning of these repulsive instruments, and how does that strange
+beast catch sparrows? When it comes out after dark and quarters the
+garden, passing swiftly under and through the branches of trees, they
+are sound asleep hidden among the leaves, motionless and silent. But
+their flesh may be scented, and their gentle breathing heard if you have
+instruments sufficiently delicate. Then the ample wings may suddenly
+enfold the sleeping body, and the savage jaws grip the startled head
+before there is time even to scream. Without a doubt this is the secret
+of the vampire bat's ears.
+
+But to find food and flee death are not the only interests in life even
+to the meanest creature. There are social pleasures, family affections
+and fellowship, sympathy and co-operation in the struggles of life. And
+there is love.
+
+ Omne adeo genus in terris hominumque ferarumque,
+ Et genus aequoreum, pecudes, pictaeque volucres,
+ In furias ignemque ruunt: amor omnibus idem.
+
+The chirping of the cricket, the song of the lark, the call of the
+sentinel crane, the watchword with which the migratory geese keep their
+squadrons together, the howling of jackals, the lowing of cows, the hum
+of the hive, the chatter of the drawing-room, and a hundred other voices
+in forest and field and town remind us that the voice and the ear are
+the pair of wheels on which society runs.
+
+And this thought points the way out of another contradictious puzzle,
+that which confronts my argument from the ears of an ass. It roams
+treeless deserts where no foe can approach unseen. Thistles make no
+sound. Why should it be adorned with ears which in their amplitude are
+scarcely surpassed by those of the rabbit and the hare. There is no
+answer unless their function is to hear the bray of a fellow-ass.... One
+may object that that majestic sound is surely of force to impress itself
+without any aid from an external ear; but that is a vain argument built
+on the costermonger's moke--dreary exile from its fatherland. Remember
+that its ancestors wandered on the steppes of Central Asia or the
+borders of the Sahara. In those boundless solitudes, with nothing that
+eye can see or that common ear can hear to remind her that she is not
+the sole inhabitant of the universe, the wild ass "snuffeth up the wind
+in her desire," and lifting her windsails to the hot blast, hears, borne
+across miles of white sand and shimmering mirage, the joyful
+reverberations of that music which tells of old comrades and boon
+companions scouring the plain and kicking up their exultant heels.
+
+Monkeys taking to trees were like the birds, they scarcely needed ears.
+And so by the high road of evolution you arrive at man and the enigma of
+his ear. It is a shrunken and shrivelled remnant, a moss-grown ruin, a
+derelict ship. It is to a pattern ear what the old shoe which you find
+in a country lane, shed from the foot of some "unemployed," is to one of
+Waukenphast's "five-miles-an-hour-easy" boots. We ought to temper our
+contempt for what it is with respect for what it was. All the parts of
+it are there and recognisable, even to the muscles that should move it,
+but we have lost control of them. I believe anyone could regain that by
+persevering exercise of his will power for a time--that is, if he has
+any. I have a friend who, if you treat him with disrespect, shrivels you
+up with a sarcastic wag of his right ear.
+
+The ears of dogs open up another vista for the questioning philosopher.
+Their day is past, too, and man may cut them short to match his own, but
+the dog grows them longer than before. When he first took service with
+man, and grew careless and lazy, the muscles got slack and the ears
+dropped, which is in accordance with Nature. Then, instead of being
+allowed to wither away, they have been handed over to the milliner and
+shaped and trimmed in harmony with the "style" of each breed of dogs.
+How it has been done is one of those mysteries which will not open to
+the iron keys of Darwin, But there it is for those to see who have eyes.
+
+[Illustration: THE CURLS OF A MOTHER'S DARLING.]
+
+The ears of the little dogs bred for ladies' laps are the curls of a
+mother's darling; the pendant love-locks of the old, old maid who,
+despite of changeful fashions, clings to those memorials of the pensive
+beauty of her youth, are repeated in solemn mimicry by the dachshund
+trotting at her heels; but the sensible fur cap of the dignified
+Newfoundland reminds us of the cold regions from which his forefathers
+came. Some kinds of terriers still have their ears starched up to look
+perky, and I have occasionally seen a dog with one ear up and the other
+down as if straining after the elusive idea expressed in the
+Baden-Powell hat. All which shows that "one touch of nature makes the
+whole world kin."
+
+
+
+
+VI
+
+
+TOMMY
+
+THE STORY OF AN OWL
+
+Among the many and various strangers within my gates who have helped to
+enliven the days of my exile, Tommy was one towards whom I still feel a
+certain sense of obligation because he taught me for the first time what
+an owl is. For Tommy was an owl. From any dictionary you may ascertain
+that an owl is a nocturnal, carnivorous bird, of a short, stout form,
+with downy feathers and a large head; and if that does not satisfy you,
+there is no lack of books which will furnish fuller and more precise
+descriptions.
+
+But descriptions cannot impart acquaintance. I had sought acquaintance
+and had gained some knowledge such as books cannot supply, not only of
+owls in general, but of that particular species of owls to which Tommy
+belonged, who, in the heraldry of ornithology, was _Carine brahma_, an
+Indian spotted owlet. This branch of the ancient family of owls has
+always been eccentric. It does not mope and to the moon complain. It
+flouts the moon and the sun and everyone who passes by, showing its
+round face at its door and even coming out, at odd times of the day, to
+stare and bob and play the clown. It does not cry "Tuwhoo, Tuwhoo," as
+the poets would have it, but laughs, jabbers, squeaks and chants
+clamorous duets with its spouse.
+
+All this I knew. I had also gathered from his public appearances that a
+spotted owlet is happy in his domestic life and that he is fond of fat
+white ants, for, when their winged swarms were flying, I had seen him
+making short flights from his perch in a tree and catching them with his
+feet; and I believed that he fed in secret on mice and lizards. But all
+that did not amount to understanding an owl, as I discovered when Tommy
+became a member of our chummery.
+
+Tommy was born in "the second city of the British Empire," to wit,
+Bombay, in the month of March, 1901. His birthplace was a hole in an old
+"Coral" tree. Domestic life in that hole was not conducted with
+regularity. Meals were at uncertain hours and uncertain also in their
+quantity and quality. The parents were hunters and were absent for long
+periods, and though there was incredible shouting and laughter when they
+returned, they came at such irregular times that we did not suspect that
+they were permanent residents and had a family. One night, however,
+Tommy, being precocious and, as we discovered afterwards, keen on seeing
+life, took advantage of parental absence to clamber to the entrance of
+the nursery and, losing his balance, toppled over into the garden. He
+kept cool, however, and tried to conceal himself, but Hurree the malee,
+watering the plants early in the morning, spied him lying with his face
+on the earth and brought him to us.
+
+He seemed dead, but he was very much alive, as appeared when he was made
+to sit up and turned those wonderful eyes of his upon us. He was a droll
+little object at that time, nearly globular in form and covered with
+down, like a toy for children to play with. His head turned like a
+revolving lighthouse and flared those eyes upon you wherever you went,
+great luminous orbs, black-centred and gold-ringed and full of silent
+wonder, or, I should rather say, surprise. This never left him. To the
+last everything that presented itself to his gaze, though he had seen it
+a hundred times, seemed to fill him with fresh surprise. Nothing ever
+became familiar. What an enviable cast of mind! It must make the
+brightness of childhood perennial.
+
+There was some discussion as to how Tommy should be fed, and we finally
+decided that one should try to open the small hooked beak, whose point
+could just be detected protruding from a nest of fluff, while another
+held a piece of raw meat ready to pop in. It did not look an easy job,
+but we had scarcely set about it when Tommy himself solved the
+difficulty by plucking the meat out of our fingers and swallowing it.
+This early intimation that, however absent he might look, he was "all
+there" was never belied, and there was no further difficulty about the
+feeding of him. When he saw us coming he always fell into the same
+ridiculous attitude, with his face in the dust, but we just picked him
+up and stood him on his proper end and showed him the meat and his
+bashfulness vanished at once.
+
+After sunset he would get lively and begin calling for his mother in a
+strange husky voice. At this time we would let him out in the garden,
+watching him closely, for, if he thought he was alone, he would sneak
+away slyly, then make a run for liberty, hobbling along at a good rate
+with the aid of his wings, though he never attempted to fly as yet. When
+detected and overtaken, he fell on his face as before. One memorable day
+he found a hole in a stone wall and, before we could stop him, he was
+in. The hole was too small to admit a hand, though not a rat or a snake,
+so the prospect was gloomy. Suddenly a happy inspiration came to me.
+That sad, husky cry with which he expressed his need of a mother was not
+difficult to mimic, and he might be cheated into thinking that a lost
+brother or sister was looking for him. I retired and made the attempt,
+and, hark! a faint echo came from the wall. At each repetition it became
+clearer, until the round face and great eyes appeared at the mouth of
+the hole. Then the round body tumbled out, and little Tommy was hobbling
+about, looking, with pathetic eagerness, for "the old familiar faces."
+When he discovered how he had been betrayed, his face went down and he
+suffered himself to be carried quietly to the canary's cage in which he
+was kept.
+
+It seemed to be time now to begin Tommy's education, for I judged that,
+if he had been at home, he would ere then have been getting nightly
+lessons in the poacher's art. So I procured a small gecko, one of those
+grey house lizards, with pellets at the ends of their toes, which come
+down from the roof after the lamps are lit and gorge themselves on the
+foolish moths and plant bugs that come to the light. Securing it with a
+thin cord tied round its waist, I introduced it into Tommy's cage. He
+looked surprised, very much surprised. He raised himself to his full
+height. He gazed at it. He curtseyed. He gave a little jump and was
+standing with both feet on the lizard. A moment more and the lizard was
+gliding down his throat with my thin cord after it. Mr. Seton Thompson
+would have us believe that all young things are laboriously trained by
+their parents, just like human children, and if he was an eye-witness of
+all the scenes that he describes so vividly, it must be so with other
+young things. But he did not know Tommy, who is the bird of Minerva and
+evidently sprang into being, like his patron goddess, with all his
+armour on.
+
+After a time, when he had exchanged his infant down for a suit of
+feathers, he was promoted to a large cage out in the garden, and his
+regular diet was a little raw meat or a mutton bone tied to one of his
+perches, but, by way of a treat, I would offer him, whenever I could get
+it, a locust, or large grasshopper. His way of accepting this was unique
+and pretty. He would look surprised, stare, curtsey once or twice, stare
+again and then, suddenly, noiselessly and as lightly as a fairy, flit
+across the cage and, without alighting, pluck the insect from my fingers
+with both his feet and return to his perch.
+
+Why he bowed to his food and to everybody and everything that presented
+itself before him was a riddle that I never solved. A materialistic
+friend suggested that he was adjusting the focus of his wonderful eyes,
+and the action was certainly like that of an optician examining a lens;
+but I feel that there was something more ceremonial about it. This
+punctiliousness cost him his dinner once. I was curious to know what he
+would do with a mouse, so, having caught one alive, I slipped it quietly
+into his cage. He was more surprised than ever before, raised himself
+erect, bowed to the earth once, twice and three times, stared, bowed
+again and so on until, to his evident astonishment and chagrin, the
+mouse found an opening and was gone. The lesson was not lost. A few days
+later I got another mouse, to which he began to do obeisance as before,
+but very soon and suddenly, though as softly as falling snow, he plumped
+upon it with both feet and, spreading his wings on the ground, looked
+all round him with infinite satisfaction. The mouse squeaked, but he
+stopped that by cracking its skull quietly with his beak. Then he
+gathered himself up and flew to the perch with his prize.
+
+One thing I noted about Tommy most emphatically. He never showed a sign
+of affection, or what is called attachment. He maintained a strictly
+bowing acquaintance with me. He was not afraid, but he would suffer no
+familiarity. He would come and eat, with due ceremony, out of my hand,
+but if I offered to touch him he was surprised and affronted and went
+off at once. When I moved to another house I found that I could not
+continue to keep him, so I sent him to the zoological garden, where I
+visited him sometimes, but he never vouchsafed a token of recognition.
+His heart was locked except to his own kin.
+
+But since that time, when I have seen an owl, even a barn owl, or a
+great horned owl, swiftly cross the sky in the darkness of night, I have
+felt that I could accompany it, in imagination, on its secret quest. It
+will arrive silently, like the angel of death, in a tree overlooking a
+field in which a rat, whose hour has come, is furtively feeding, all
+alert and tremulous, but unaware of any impending danger. The rat will
+go on feeding, unconscious of the mocking curtsey and the baleful eyes
+that follow with mute attention its every motion, until the hand of the
+clock has moved to the point assigned by fate, and then it will feel
+eight sharp talons plunged into its flesh. I have seen the fierce dash
+of the sparrow hawk into a crowd of unsuspecting sparrows, I know the
+triumph of the falcon as it rises for the final, fatal swoop on the
+flying duck, and I have watched the kestrel, high in air, scanning the
+field for some rash mouse or lizard that has wandered too far from
+shelter. The owl is also a bird of prey, but its idea is different from
+all these.
+
+
+
+
+VII
+
+
+THE BARN OWL
+
+A FRIEND OF MAN
+
+A thunderstorm has burst on the common rat. Its complicity in the spread
+of the plague, which has been proved up to the hilt, has filled the cup
+of its iniquities to overflowing, and we have awakened to the fact that
+it is and always has been an arch-enemy of mankind. Simultaneously, in
+widely separated parts of the world, a "pogrom" has been proclaimed, and
+the accounts of the massacre which come to us from great cities like
+Calcutta and Bombay are appalling and almost incredible. They would move
+to pity the most callous heart, if pity could be associated with the
+rat. But it cannot.
+
+The wild rat deserves that humane consideration to which all our natural
+fellow-creatures on this earth are entitled; but the domestic rat (I use
+this term advisedly, for though man has not domesticated it, it has
+thoroughly domesticated itself) cannot justify its existence. It is a
+fungus of civilisation. If it confined itself to its natural food, the
+farmer's grain, the tax which it levies on the country would still be
+such as no free people ought to endure. But it confines itself to
+nothing. As Waterton says: "After dining on carrion in the filthiest
+sink, it will often manage to sup on the choicest dainties of the
+larder, where like Celoeno of old _vestigia foeda relinquit_." It kills
+chickens, plunders the nests of little birds, devouring mother, eggs and
+young, murders and feeds on its brothers and sisters and even its own
+offspring, and not infrequently tastes even man when it finds him
+asleep. The bite of a rat is sometimes very poisonous, and I have had to
+give three months' sick leave to a clerk who had been bitten by one. Add
+to this that the rat multiplies at a rate which is simply criminal,
+rearing a family of perhaps a dozen every two or three months, and no
+further argument is needed to justify the war which has been declared
+against it. Every engine of war will, no doubt, be brought into use,
+traps of many kinds, poisons, cats, the professional rat-catcher, and a
+rat bacillus which, if once it gets a footing, is expected to originate
+a fearful epidemic.
+
+But I need not linger any more among rats, which are not my subject. I
+am writing in the hope that this may be an opportune time to put in a
+plea for a much persecuted native of this and many other countries,
+whose principal function in the economy of nature is to kill rats and
+mice. The barn, or screech, owl, which is found over a great part of
+Europe and Asia and also in America, was once very common in Britain,
+inhabiting every "ivy-mantled tower," church steeple, barn loft, hollow
+tree, or dovecot, in which it could get a lodging. But it was never
+welcome. Like the Jews in the days of King John it has been relentlessly
+persecuted by superstition, ignorance and avarice. Avarice, instigated
+by ladies and milliners, has looked with covetous eye on its downy and
+beautiful plumes; while ignorance and superstition have feared and hated
+the owl in all countries and all ages. In ancient Rome it was a bird of
+evil omen.
+
+ Foedaque fit volucris venturi nuncia luctus,
+ Ignavus bubo, dirum mortalibus omen.
+
+In India, to-day, if an owl sits on the house-top, the occupants dare
+scarcely lie down to sleep, for they know that the devil is walking the
+rooms and marking someone for death. Lady Macbeth, when about the murder
+of Duncan, starts and whispers,
+
+ Hark! Peace! It was the owl that shrieked,
+ The fatal bellman.
+
+And even as late as the nineteenth century, Waterton's aged housekeeper
+"knew full well what sorrow it had brought into other houses when she
+was a young woman," Witches, like modern ladies of fashion, set great
+value on its wings. The latter stick them on their hats, the witches in
+Macbeth threw them into their boiling cauldron. Horace's Canidia could
+not complete her recipe without
+
+ "Plumamque nocturnae strigis."
+
+We may suppose that in Britain these superstitions are gone for ever,
+killed and buried by board schools and compulsory education. If they are
+(there is room for an _if_) they have been succeeded by a worse, the
+superstition of gamekeepers and farmers. It is worse in effect, because
+these men have guns, which their predecessors had not. And it is more
+wicked, because it is founded on an ignorance for which there is no
+excuse. How little harm the barn owl is likely to do game may be
+inferred from the fact that, when it makes its lodging in a dovecot, the
+pigeons suffer no concern! Waterton (and no better authority could be
+quoted) scouts the idea, common among farmers, that its business there
+is to eat the pigeons' eggs. "They lay the saddle," he says, "on the
+wrong horse. They ought to put it on the rat." His predecessor in the
+estate had allowed the owls to be destroyed and the rats to multiply,
+and there were few young pigeons in the dovecot. Waterton took strong
+measures to exterminate the rats, but built breeding places for the
+owls, and the dovecot, which they constantly frequented, became prolific
+again.
+
+But granting that the owls did twice the injury to game with which they
+are credited, it would be repaid many times over by their services.
+Waterton well says that, if we knew its utility in thinning the country
+of mice, it would be with us what the ibis was with the Egyptians--a
+sacred bird. He examined the pellets ejected by a pair of owls that
+occupied a ruined gateway on the estate. Every pellet contained
+skeletons of from four to seven mice. Owls, it may be necessary to
+explain, swallow their food without separating flesh from bone, skin and
+hair, and afterwards disgorge the indigestible portions rolled up into
+little balls. In sixteen months the pair of owls above-mentioned had
+accumulated a deposit of more than a bushel of these pellets, each a
+funeral urn of from four to seven mice! In the old Portuguese fort of
+Bassein in Western India I noticed that the earth at the foot of a
+ruined tower was plentifully mixed with small skulls, jaws and other
+bones. Taking home a handful and examining them, I found that they were
+the remains of rats, mice and muskrats.
+
+The owl kills small birds, large insects, frogs and even fishes, but
+these are extras: its profession is rat-catching and mousing, and only
+those who have a very intimate personal acquaintance with it know how
+peculiarly its equipment and methods are adapted to this work. The
+falcon gives open chase to the wild duck, keeping above it if possible
+until near enough for a last spurt; then it comes down at a speed which
+is terrific, and, striking the duck from above, dashes it to the ground.
+The sparrow hawk plunges unexpectedly into a group of little birds and
+nips up one with a long outstretched foot before they have time to get
+clear of each other. The harrier skims over field, copse and meadow,
+suddenly rounding corners and topping fences and surprising small
+birds, or mice, on which it drops before they have recovered from their
+surprise.
+
+The owl does none of these things. For one thing, it hunts in the night,
+when its sight is keenest and rats are abroad feeding. Its flight is
+almost noiseless and yet marvellously light and rapid when it pleases.
+Sailing over field, lane and hedgerow and examining the ground as it
+goes, it finds a likely place and takes a post of observation on a fence
+perhaps, or a sheaf of corn. Here it sits, bolt upright, all eyes. It
+sees a rat emerge from the grass and advance slowly, as it feeds, into
+open ground. There is no hurry, for the doom of that rat is already
+fixed. So the owl just sits and watches till the right moment has
+arrived; then it flits swiftly, softly, silently, across the intervening
+space and drops like a flake of snow. Without warning, or suspicion of
+danger, the rat feels eight sharp claws buried in its flesh. It protests
+with frantic squeals, but these are stopped with a nip that crunches its
+skull, and the owl is away with it to the old tower, where the hungry
+children are calling, with weird, impatient hisses, for something to
+eat.
+
+The owl does not hunt the fields and hedgerows only. It goes to all
+places where rats or mice may be, reconnoitres farmyards, barns and
+dwelling houses and boldly enters open windows. Sometimes it hovers in
+the air, like a kestrel, scanning the ground below. And though its
+regular hunting hours are from dusk till dawn, it has been seen at work
+as late as nine or ten on a bright summer morning. But the vulgar boys
+of bird society are fond of mobbing it when it appears abroad by day,
+and it dislikes publicity.
+
+The barn owl lays its eggs in the places which it inhabits. There is
+usually a thick bed of pellets on the floor, and it considers no other
+nest needful. The eggs are said to be laid in pairs. There may be two,
+four, or six, of different eggs, in the nest, and perhaps a young one,
+or two, at the same time. Eggs are found from April, or even March, till
+June or July, and there is, sometimes at any rate, a second brood as
+late as November or December. This owl does not hoot, but screeches. A
+weird and ghostly voice it is, from which, according to Ovid, the bird
+has its Latin name, Strix (pronounced "Streex," probably, at that time).
+
+ Est illis strigibus nomen, sed nominis hujus.
+ Causa, quod horrenda stridere nocte silent.
+
+It is a sound which, coming suddenly out of the darkness, might well
+start fears and forebodings in the dark and guilty mind of untutored
+man, which would not be dispelled by a nearer view of the strange object
+from which they proceeded. White, ghostly, upright, spindle-shaped and
+biggest at the top, where two great orbs flare, like fiery bull's-eyes,
+from the centres of two round white targets, it stands solemn and
+speechless; you approach nearer and it falls into fearsome pantomimic
+attitudes and grimaces, like a clown trying to frighten a child. And now
+a new horror has been added to the barn owl. The numerous letters which
+appeared in _The Times_ and were summarised, with comments, by Sir T.
+Digby Pigott, C.B., in _The Contemporary Review_ of July 1908, leave no
+reasonable room for doubt that this bird sometimes becomes brightly
+luminous, and is the will-o'-the-wisp for believing in which we are
+deriding our forefathers. All things considered, I cannot withhold my
+sympathy and some respect for the superstition of aged housekeepers,
+Romans and Indians. For that of gamekeepers and farmers I have neither.
+All our new schemes of "Nature study" will surely deserve the reproach
+of futility if, in the next generation, every farmhouse in England has
+not its own Owl Tower for the encouragement of this friend of man.
+
+
+
+
+VIII
+
+
+DOMESTIC ANIMALS
+
+Long before Jubal became the father of all such as handle the harp and
+the organ and Tubalcain the instructor of every artificer in brass and
+iron, Abel was a keeper of sheep, but the sacred writer has not informed
+us how he first caught them and tamed them. If we consult other records
+of the infancy of the human race, they reveal as little. When the
+Egyptians began to portray their daily life on stone 6,000 or 7,000
+years ago, they already had cattle and sheep, geese and ducks and dogs
+and plenty of asses, though not horses. They got these from the
+Assyrians, who had used them in their chariots long before they began to
+record anything.
+
+Further back than this we have no one to question except those shadowy
+men of the Stone Age who have left us heaps of their implements, but
+none of their bones. They were not so careful of the bones of horses,
+which lie in thousands about the precincts of their untidy villages, but
+not a scrawl on a bit of a mammoth tusk has been found to indicate
+whether these were ridden and driven, or only hunted and eaten.
+
+Why should it be recorded that Cadmus invented letters? Why should we
+inquire who first made gunpowder and glass? Why should every schoolboy
+be taught that Watt was the inventor of the steam engine? Can any of
+these be put in the scale, as benefactors of our race, with the man who
+first trained a horse to carry him on its back, or drew milk with his
+hands from the udders of a cow? The familiarity of the thing has made us
+callous to the wonder of it. Let us put it before us, like a painting or
+a statue, and have a good look at it.
+
+There is a farmhouse, any common farmhouse, just one of the molecules
+that constitute the mass of our wholesome country life. A horse is being
+harnessed for the plough: its ancestors sniffed the wind on the steppes
+of Tartary. Meek cows are standing to be milked: when primitive man
+first knew them in their native forests he used to give them a wide
+berth, for his flint arrows fell harmless off their tough hides, and
+they were fierce exceedingly. A cock is crowing on the fence as if the
+whole farm belonged to himself: he ought to be skulking in an Indian
+jungle. The sheep have no business here; their place is on the rocky
+mountains of Asia. As for the dog, it is difficult to assign it a
+country, for it owns no wild kindred in any part of the world, but it
+ought at least to be worrying the sheep. If there is an ass, it is a
+native of Abyssinia, and the Turkeys are Americans. The cat derives its
+descent from an Egyptian.
+
+But all these are of one country now and of one religion. They know no
+home nor desire any, except the farmhouse, in which they were born and
+bred, and the lord of it is their lord, to whom they look for food and
+protection. And what would he do without them? What should we do without
+them? It is impossible to conceive that life could be carried on if we
+were deprived of these obedient and uncomplaining servants. High
+civilisation has been attained without steam engines; education, as we
+use the term now, is superfluous--Runjeet Singh, the Lion of the Punjab,
+could neither read nor write; the human race has prospered and
+multiplied without the knowledge of iron; but we know of no time when
+man did without domestic animals.
+
+It is vain to speculate how the thing first came about, whether the
+sportive anthropoid ape took to riding on a wild goat before he emerged
+as a man keeping flocks, or whether some great pioneer, destined to be
+worshipped in after ages as a demigod, showed his fellows how the wild
+calves, if taken young, might be trained into tractable slaves; and it
+is hopeless to expect that any record will now leap to light which will
+give us knowledge in place of speculation. But it might not be
+unprofitable to seek for some clue to the strange selection which the
+domesticating genius of man has made from among the multifarious
+material presented to it by the animal kingdom. If we do so we shall
+almost be forced to the conclusion that domesticability is a character,
+or quality, inherent in some animals and entirely wanting in others.
+
+Let us begin with pigeons, a very large group, but one that shows more
+unity than any of the other Orders into which naturalists divide birds.
+It embraces turtle doves of many species, wood pigeons, ground pigeons,
+fruit pigeons and some strange forms like the great crowned pigeon of
+Victoria. Of all these only one, the common blue rock, has been
+domesticated. The ring dove of Asia has been kept as a cage bird for so
+long that a permanent albino and also a fawn-coloured variety have been
+established and are more common in aviaries than birds of the natural
+colour; but the ring dove has not become a domestic fowl, and never
+will. In this instance there is a plausible explanation, for the blue
+rock, unlike the rest of the tribe, nests and roosts in holes and is
+also gregarious; therefore, if provided with accommodation of the kind
+it requires, it will form a permanent settlement and remain with us on
+the same terms as the honey bee; while the ring dove, not caring for a
+fixed home, must be confined, however tame it may become, or it will
+wander and be lost.
+
+But this explanation will not fit other cases. What a multitude of wild
+ducks there are in Scotland and every other country, mallards, pintails,
+gadwalls, widgeons, pochards and teals, all very much alike in their
+habits and tastes! But of them all only one species, and that a
+migratory one, the mallard, has been persuaded to abandon its wandering
+ways and settle down to a life of ease and obesity as a dependant of
+man. In India there is a duck of the same genus as the mallard, known as
+the spotted-billed duck (_Anas poecilorhynchus_), which is as large as
+the mallard and quite as tasty, and is, moreover, not migratory, but
+remains and breeds in the country. But it has not been domesticated: the
+tame ducks in India, as here, are all mallards. The muscovy duck is a
+distinct species which has been domesticated elsewhere and introduced.
+
+From the ducks let us turn to the hens. The partridge, grouse and
+pheasant are all dainty birds, but if we desire to eat them we must
+shoot them, or (_proh pudor!_) snare them. Plover's eggs are worth four
+shillings a dozen, but we must seek them on the moors. The birds that
+have covenanted to accept our food and protection and lay their eggs for
+our use and rear their young for us to kill are descended from _Gallus
+bankivus_, the jungle fowl of Eastern India. How they came here history
+records not: perhaps the gipsies brought them. They appear now in
+strange and diverse guise, the ponderous and feather-legged
+Cochin-China, the clean-limbed and wiry game, the crested Houdan, the
+Minorca with its monstrous comb, and the puny bantam. In Japan there is
+a breed that carries a tail seven or eight feet in length, which has to
+be "done" regularly like a lady's hair, to keep it from dirt and damage.
+
+But however their outward aspects may differ, they are of the same
+blood and know it. A featherweight bantam cock will stand up to an
+elephantine brahma and fight him according to the rules of the ring and
+next minute pay compliments to his lady in language which she will be at
+no loss to understand. And if the artificial conditions of their life
+were removed, they would soon all lapse alike to the image of the stock
+from which they are sprung. This is well illustrated in a show case in
+the South Kensington Museum exhibiting a group of fowls from Pitcairn's
+Island. These are descended from some stock landed by the mutinous crew
+of H.M.S. _Bounty_ in 1790, which ran wild, and in a century they have
+gone back to the small size and lithe figure and almost to the game
+colour of the wild birds from which they branched off before history
+dawned.
+
+If we turn next to the Ruminants, the clean beasts which chew the cud
+and divide the hoof, the puzzle becomes harder still. Deer and antelopes
+are often kept as pets, and become so tame that they are allowed to
+wander at liberty. In Egypt herds of gazelles were so kept before the
+days of Cheops. In India I have known a black buck which regularly
+attended the station cricket ground, moving among the nervous players
+with its nose in the air and insolence in its gait, fully aware that
+eighteen-inch horns with very sharp points insured respectful treatment.
+Mr. Sterndale trained a Neilghai to go in harness. The great bovine
+antelopes of Africa would become as tame, and there is no reason to
+suppose that their beef and milk would not be as good as those of the
+cow. But no antelope or deer appears ever to have been domesticated,
+with the exception of the reindeer.
+
+Of the other ruminants the ox, buffalo, yak, goat, sheep and a few
+others are domestic animals, while the bison and the gaur, or so-called
+Indian bison, and a large number of wild goats and sheep have been
+neglected. The buffalo and yak have probably come under the yoke in
+comparatively recent times, for they are little changed; but the goat
+and still more the sheep have undergone a wonderful transformation
+within and without. Who could recognise in a Leicester ewe the wary
+denizen of precipitous mountains which will not feed until it has set a
+sentinel to give warning if danger approaches? And here is a curious
+fact which has scarcely been noticed by naturalists.
+
+The original of our goat is supposed to be the Persian ibex. At any
+rate, it was an ibex of some species, as its horns plainly show. But on
+the plains of Northern India, under ranges of hills on which the Persian
+ibex wanders wild, the common domestic goat is a very different animal
+from that of Europe, and has peculiar spiral horns of the same pattern
+as the markhor, another grand species of wild goat which draws eager
+hunters to the higher reaches of the same mountains. From this it would
+appear that two species of wild goat have been domesticated and kept to
+some extent distinct, one eventually finding its way westward, but not
+eastward and southward.
+
+The Indian humped cattle also differ so widely in form, structure and
+voice from those of Europe that there can scarcely be a doubt of their
+descent from distinct species. But both have entirely disappeared as
+wild animals, unless indeed the white cattle of Chillingham are really
+descendants of Caesar's dreadful urus and not merely domestic cattle
+lapsed into savagery. So have the camel, and, with a similar possible
+exception, the horse. Was the whole race in each of these cases
+subjugated, or exterminated, and that by uncivilised man with his
+primitive weapons? There is no analogy here with the extinction of such
+animals as the mammoth, for the ox is a beast in every way fitted to
+live and thrive in the present condition of this world, as much so as
+the buffalo and the Indian bison, which show no sign of approaching
+extinction. Our fathers easily got rid of the difficulty by assuming
+that Noah never released these species after the Flood, but what shall
+those do who cannot believe in the literality of Noah's ark?
+
+As for the dog, its domestication has been the creation of a new
+species. The material was perhaps the wolf, more likely the jackal, but
+possibly a blend of more than one species. But a dog is now a dog and
+neither a wolf nor a jackal. A mastiff, a pug, a collie, a greyhound, a
+pariah all recognise each other and observe the same rules of etiquette
+when they meet.
+
+We must admit, however, that, whatever pliability of disposition, or
+other inherent suitability, led to the first domestication of certain
+species of animals, the changes induced in their natures by many
+generations of domesticity have made them amenable to man's control to a
+degree which puts a wide difference between them and their wild
+relations. A wild ass, though brought up from its birth in a stable,
+would make a very intractable costermonger's moke. We may infer from
+this that the first subjugation of each of our common domestic animals
+was the achievement of some genius, or of some tribe favourably
+situated, and that they spread from that centre by sale or barter,
+rather than that they were separately domesticated in many places. This
+would partly explain why a few species of widely different families are
+so universally kept in all countries to the exclusion of hundreds of
+species nearly allied and apparently as suitable. When a want could be
+supplied by obtaining from another country an animal bred to live with
+man and serve him, the long and difficult task of softening down the
+wild instincts of a beast taken from the forests or the hills and
+acclimatising its constitution to a domestic life was not likely to be
+attempted.
+
+But there have been a few recent additions to our list of domestic
+animals. The turkey and the guinea fowl are examples, and perhaps
+within another generation we may be able to add the zebra. And there may
+be many other animals fitted to enrich and adorn human life which would
+make no insuperable resistance to domestication if wisely and patiently
+handled. Here is a noble opening for carrying out in its kindest sense
+the command, "Multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have
+dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and
+over every living thing that moveth upon the face of the earth."
+
+
+
+
+IX
+
+
+SNAKES
+
+I have met persons, otherwise quite sane, who told me that they would
+like to visit India if it were not for the _snakes_. Now there is
+something very depressing in the thought that this state of mind is
+extant in England, for it is calculated, on occasion, to have results of
+a most melancholy nature. By way of example, let us picture the case of
+a broken-hearted maiden forced to reject an ardent lover because duty
+calls him to a land where there are snakes. Think of his happiness
+blighted for ever and her doomed to a "perpetual maidenhood," harrowed
+with remorseful dreams of the hourly perils and horrors through which he
+must be passing without her, and dreading to enter an academy or
+picture-gallery lest a laocoon or a fury might revive apprehensions too
+horrible to be borne. In view of possibilities so dreadful, surely it is
+a duty that a man owes to his kind to disseminate the truth, if he can,
+about the present condition in the East of that reptile which, crawling
+on its belly and eating dust and having its head bruised by the
+descendants of Eve, sometimes pays off her share of the curse on their
+heels. Here the truth is.
+
+Within the limits of our Indian Empire, including Burmah and Ceylon,
+there are at present known to naturalists two hundred and sixty-four
+species of snakes. Twenty-seven of these are sea-serpents, which never
+leave the sea, and could not if they would. The remaining two hundred
+and thirty-seven species comprise samples of every size and pattern of
+limbless reptile found on this globe, from the gigantic python, which
+crushes a jackal and swallows it whole, to the little burrowing
+_Typhlops_, whose proportions are those of an earthworm and its food
+white ants.
+
+If you have made up your mind never to touch a snake or go nearer to one
+than you can help, then I need scarcely tell you what you know already,
+that these are all alike hideous and repulsive in their aspect, being
+smeared from head to tail with a viscous and venomous slime, which, as
+your Shakespeare will tell you, leaves a trail even on fig-leaves when
+they have occasion to pass over such. This preparation would appear to
+line them inside as well as out, for there is no lack of ancient and
+modern testimony to the fact that they "slaver" their prey all over
+before swallowing it, that it may slide the more easily down their
+ghastly throats. Their eye is cruel and stony, and possesses a peculiar
+property known as "fascination," which places their victims entirely at
+their mercy. They have also the power of coiling themselves up like a
+watch-spring and discharging themselves from a considerable distance at
+those whom they have doomed to death--a fact which is attested by such
+passages in the poets as--
+
+ Like adder darting from his coil,
+
+and by travellers _passim_.
+
+This is the true faith with respect to all serpents, and if you are
+resolved to remain steadfast in it, you may do so even in India, for it
+is possible to live in that country for months, I might almost say
+years, without ever getting a sight of a live snake except in the basket
+of a snake-charmer. If, however, you are minded to cultivate an
+acquaintance with them, it is not difficult to find opportunities of
+doing so, but I must warn you that it will be with jeopardy to your
+faith, for the very first thing that will strike you about them will
+probably be their cleanness. What has become of the classical slime I
+cannot tell, but it is a fact that the skin of a modern snake is always
+delightfully dry and clean, and as smooth to the touch as velvet.
+
+The next thing that attracts attention is their beauty, not so much the
+beauty of their colours as of their forms. With few exceptions, snakes
+are the most graceful of living things. Every position into which they
+put themselves, and every motion of their perfectly proportioned forms,
+is artistic. The effect of this is enhanced by their gentleness and the
+softness of their movements.
+
+But if you want to see them properly, you must be careful not to
+frighten them, for there is no creature more timid at heart than a
+snake. One will sometimes let you get quite near to it and watch it,
+simply because it does not notice you, being rather deaf and very
+shortsighted, but when it does discover your presence, its one thought
+is to slip away quietly and hide itself. It is on account of this
+extreme timidity that we see them so seldom.
+
+Of the two hundred and thirty-seven kinds that I have referred to, some
+are, of course, very rare, or only found in particular parts of the
+country, but at least forty or fifty of them occur everywhere, and some
+are as plentiful as crows. Yet they keep themselves out of our way so
+successfully that it is quite a rare event to meet with one.
+Occasionally one finds its way into a house in quest of frogs, lizards,
+musk-rats, or some other of the numerous malefactors that use our
+dwellings as cities of refuge from the avenger, and it is discovered by
+the Hamal behind a cupboard, or under a carpet. He does the one thing
+which it occurs to a native to do in any emergency--viz. raises an
+alarm. Then there is a general hubbub, servants rush together with the
+longest sticks they can find, the children are hurried away to a place
+of safety, the master appears on the scene, armed with his gun, and the
+
+ Wee, sleekit, cowrin', tim'rous beastie,
+
+trying to slip away from the fuss which it dislikes so much, is headed,
+and blown, or battered, to pieces. Then its head is pounded to a jelly,
+for the servants are agreed that, if this precaution is omitted, it will
+revive during the night and come and coil itself on the chest of its
+murderer.
+
+Finally a council is held and a unanimous resolution recorded that
+deceased was a serpent of the deadliest kind. This is not a lie, for
+they believe it; but in the great majority of cases it is an untruth. Of
+our two hundred and thirty-seven kinds of snakes only forty-four are
+ranked by naturalists as venomous, and many of these are quite incapable
+of killing any animal as large as a man. Others are very rare or local.
+In short, we may reckon the poisonous snakes with which we have any
+practical concern at four kinds, and the chance of a snake found in the
+house belonging to one of these kinds stands at less than one in ten.
+
+It is a sufficiently terrible thought, however, that there are even four
+kinds of reptiles going silently about the land whose bite is certain
+death. If they knew their powers and were maliciously disposed, our life
+in the East would be like Christian's progress through the Valley of the
+Shadow of Death. But the poisonous snakes are just as timid as the rest,
+and as little inclined to act on the offensive against any living
+creature except the little animals on which they prey. Even a trodden
+worm will turn, and a snake has as much spirit as a worm. If a man
+treads on it, it will turn and bite him. But it has no desire to be
+trodden on. It does its best to avoid that mischance, and, I need
+scarcely say, so does a man unless he is drunk. When both parties are
+sincerely anxious to avoid a collision, a collision is not at all likely
+to occur, and the fact is that, of all forms of death to which we are
+exposed in India, death by snake-bite is about the one which we have
+least reason to apprehend.
+
+During a pretty long residence in India I have heard of only one
+instance of an Englishman being killed by a snake. It was in Manipur,
+and I read of it in the newspapers. During the same time I have heard of
+only one death by lightning and one by falling into the fermenting vat
+of a brewery, so I suppose these accidents are equally uncommon. Eating
+oysters is much more fatal: I have heard of at least four or five deaths
+from that cause.
+
+The natives are far more exposed to danger from snakes than we are,
+because they go barefoot, by night as well as day, through fields and
+along narrow, overgrown footpaths about their villages. The tread of a
+barefooted man does not make noise enough to warn a snake to get out of
+his way, and if he treads on one, there is nothing between its fangs and
+his skin. Again, the huts of the natives, being made of wattle and daub
+and thatched with straw, offer to snakes just the kind of shelter that
+they like, and the wonder is that naked men, sleeping on the ground in
+such places, and poking about dark corners, among their stores of fuel
+and other chattels, meet with so few accidents. It says a great deal for
+the mild and inoffensive nature of the snake. Still, the total number of
+deaths by snake-bite reported every year is very large, and looks
+absolutely appalling if you do not think of dividing it among three
+hundred millions. Treated in that way it shrivels up at once, and when
+compared with the results of other causes of death, looks quite
+insignificant.
+
+The natives themselves are so far from regarding the serpent tribe with
+our feelings that the deadliest of them all has been canonised and is
+treated with all the respect due to a sub-deity. No Brahmin, or
+religious-minded man of any respectable caste, will have a cobra killed
+on any account. If one takes to haunting his premises, he will
+propitiate it with offerings of silk and look for good luck from its
+patronage.
+
+About snakes other than the cobra the average native concerns himself so
+little that he does not know one from another by sight. They are all
+classed together as _janwar,_ a word which answers exactly to the
+"venomous beast" of Acts xxviii. 4; and though they are aware that some
+are deadly and some are not, any particular snake that a _sahib_ has had
+the honour to kill is one of the deadliest as a matter of course. I have
+never met a native who knew that a venomous snake could be distinguished
+by its fangs, except a few doctors and educated men who have imbibed
+western science. In fact they do not think of the venom as a material
+substance situated in the mouth. It is an effluence from the entire
+animal, which may be projected at a man in various ways, by biting him,
+or spitting at him, or giving him a flick with the tail.
+
+The Government of India spends a large sum of money every year in
+rewards for the destruction of snakes. This is one of those sacrifices
+to sentiment which every prudent government offers. The sentiment to
+which respect is paid in this case is of course British, not Indian.
+Indian sentiment is propitiated by not levying any tax on dogs, so the
+pariah cur, owned and disowned, in all stages of starvation, mange and
+disease, infests every town and village, lying in wait for the bacillus
+of rabies. Against the one fatal case of snake-bite mentioned above, I
+have known of at least half a dozen deaths among Englishmen from the
+more horrible scourge of hydrophobia. In the steamer which brought me
+home there were two private soldiers on their way to M. Pasteur, at the
+expense, of course, of the British Government.
+
+
+
+
+X
+
+
+THE INDIAN SNAKE-CHARMER
+
+We must wait for another month or two before we can think of the winter
+in this country in the past tense, but in India the month of March is
+the beginning of the hot season, and the tourists who have been enjoying
+the pleasant side of Anglo-Indian life and assuring themselves that
+their exiled countrymen have not much to grumble at will now be making
+haste to flee.
+
+During the month the various hotels of Bombay will be pretty familiar
+with the grey sun-hat, fortified with _puggaree_ and pendent flap, which
+is the sign of the globe-trotter in the East. And all the tribe of birds
+of prey who look upon him as their lawful spoil will recognise the sign
+from afar and gather about him as he sits in the balcony after
+breakfast, taking his last view of the gorgeous East, and perhaps (it is
+to be feared) seeking inspiration for a few matured reflections
+wherewith to bring the forthcoming book to an impressive close. The
+vendor of Delhi jewellery will be there and the Sind-work-box-walla,
+with his small, compressed white turban and spotless robes, and the
+Cashmere shawl merchant and many more, pressing on the gentleman's
+notice for the last time their most tempting wares and preparing for the
+long bout of fence which will decide at what point between "asking
+price" and "selling price" each article shall change ownership. The
+distance between these two points is wide and variable, depending upon
+the indications of wealth about the purchaser's person and the
+indications of innocence about his countenance.
+
+And when the poor globe-trotter, who has long since spent more money
+than he ever meant to spend, and loaded himself with things which he
+could have got cheaper in London or New York, tries to shake off his
+tormentors by getting up and leaning over the balcony rails, the shrill
+voice of the snake-charmer will assail him from below, promising him, in
+a torrent of sonorous Hindustanee, variegated with pigeon English and
+illuminated with wild gesticulations, such a superfine _tamasha_ as it
+never was the fortune of the _sahib_ to witness before.
+
+_Tamasha_ is one of those Indian words, like _bundobust_, for which
+there is no equivalent in the English language, and which are at once so
+comprehensive and so expressive that, when once the use of them has been
+acquired, they become indispensable, so that they have gained a
+permanent place in the Anglo-Indian's vocabulary. It is not slang, but a
+good word of ancient origin. Hobson-Jobson quotes a curious Latin writer
+on the Empire of the Grand Mogul, who uses it with a definition
+appended, "ut spectet Thamasham, id est pugnas elephantorum, leonum,
+buffalorum et aliarura ferarum." "Show" comes nearest it in English, but
+falls far short of it.
+
+The _tamasha_ which the snake-charmer promises the _sahib_ will include
+serpent dances, a fight between a cobra and a mungoose, the inevitable
+mango tree, and other tricks of juggling. But to a stranger the
+snake-charmer himself is a better _tamasha_ than anything he can show.
+He is indeed a most extraordinary animal. His hair and beard are long
+and unkempt, his general aspect wild, his clothing a mixture of savagery
+and the wreckage of civilisation. He wears a turban, of course, and
+generally a large one; but it is put on without art, just wound about
+his head anyhow, and hanging lopsidedly over one ear. It and the loose
+cloth wrapped about the middle of him are as dirty as may be and truly
+Oriental, though erratic. But, besides these, he wears a jacket of
+coloured calico, or any other material, with one button fastened,
+probably on the wrong buttonhole, and under this, if the weather is
+cold, he may have a shirt seemingly obtained from some Indian
+representative of Moses & Co.
+
+On his shoulder he carries a long bamboo, from the ends of which hang
+villainously shabby baskets, some flat and round, occupied by snakes,
+others large and oblong, filled with apparatus of jugglery. The members
+of his family, down to an unclothed, precocious imp of ten, accompany
+him, carrying similar baskets, or capacious wallets, or long,
+cylindrical drums, on which they play with their fingers. The dramatic
+effect of the whole is enhanced when one of them allows a huge python, a
+snake of the _Boa constrictor_ tribe, which kills its prey by crushing
+it, to wind its hideous, speckled coils round his body.
+
+What the snake-charmer is by race or origin ethnologists may determine
+when they have done with the gipsy. He is not a Hindu. No particular
+part of the country acknowledges him as its native. He is to the great
+races, castes, and creeds of India what the waif is to the billows of
+the sea. His language, in public at least, is Hindustanee, but this is a
+sort of _lingua franca_, the common property of all the inhabitants of
+the country. His religion is probably one of the many forms of demon
+worship which grow rank on the fringes of Hinduism. He must be classed,
+no doubt, with the other wandering tribes which roam the country,
+camping under umbrellas, or something little better, each consecrated to
+some particular form of common crime, and each professing some not in
+itself dishonest occupation, like the tinkering of gipsies.
+
+But the snake-charmer is the best known and most widely spread of them
+all. By occupation he is a professor of three occult sciences. First, he
+is a juggler, and in this art he has some skill. His masterpiece is the
+famous mango trick, which consists in making a miniature mango tree
+grow up in a few minutes, and even blossom and bear fruit, out of some
+bare spot which he has covered with his mysterious basket. It has been
+written about by travellers in extravagant terms of astonishment and
+admiration, but, as generally performed, is an extremely clumsy-looking
+trick, though it is undoubtedly difficult to guess how it is done. A
+more blood-curdling feat is to put the unclothed and precocious imp
+aforementioned under a large basket, and then run a sword savagely
+through and through every corner of it, and draw it out covered with
+gore. When the sickened spectators are about to lynch the murderer, the
+imp runs in smiling from the garden gate.
+
+The connection between these performances and the man's second trade,
+namely, snake-charming, is not obvious to a Western mind; but it must be
+remembered that the snake-charmer is not a mere, vulgar juggler, amusing
+people with sleight-of-hand. His feats are miracles, performed with the
+assistance of superior powers. In short, he is a theosophist, only his
+converse is not with excorporated Mahatmas from Thibet, but with spirits
+of another grade, whose Superior has been known from very remote
+antiquity as an Old Serpent. In deference to this respectable connection
+the cobra holds a distinguished place even in orthodox Hinduism. So it
+is altogether fit that a performer of wonders should be on intimate
+terms with the serpent tribe. The snake-charmer keeps all sorts of
+them, but chiefly cobras. These he professes to charm from their holes
+by playing upon an instrument which may have some hereditary connection
+with the bagpipe, for it has an air-reservoir consisting of a large
+gourd, and it makes a most abominable noise. As soon as the cobra shows
+itself the charmer catches it by the tail with one hand, and, running
+the other swiftly along its body, grips it firmly just behind the jaws,
+so that it cannot turn and bite. Practice and coolness make this an easy
+feat. Then the poison fangs are pulled out with a pair of forceps and
+the cobra is quite harmless. It is kept in a round, flat basket, out of
+which, when the charmer removes the lid and begins to play, it raises
+its graceful head, and, expanding its hood, sways gently in response to
+the music.
+
+Scientific men aver that a snake has no ears and cannot possibly hear
+the strains of the pipe, but that sort of science simply spoils a
+picturesque subject like the snake-charmer. So much is certain, that all
+snakes cannot be played upon in this way: there are some species which
+are utterly callous to the influences to which the cobra yields itself
+so readily. No missionary will find any difficulty in getting a
+snake-charmer to appreciate that Scripture text about the deaf adder
+which will not listen to the voice of the charmer, charm he never so
+wisely.
+
+To these two occupations the snake-charmer adds that of a medicine man,
+for who should know the occult potencies of herbs and trees so well as
+he? So, as he wanders from village to village, he is welcomed as well as
+feared. But one wealthy tourist is worth more to him than a whole
+village of ryots, so he keeps his eye on every town in which he is
+likely to fall in with the travelling white man. And the travelling
+white man would be sorry to miss him, for he is one of the few relics of
+an ancient state of things which railways and telegraphs and the
+Educational Department have left unchanged.
+
+The itinerant jeweller and the Sind-work-box-walla are unmistakably
+being left behind as the East hurries after the West, and we shall soon
+know them no more. Showy shops, where the inexperienced traveller may
+see all the products of Sind and Benares, and Cutch and Cashmere, spread
+before him at fixed prices, are multiplying rapidly and taking the bread
+from the mouth of the poor hawker. But the snake-charmer seems safe from
+that kind of competition. It is difficult to forecast a time when a
+broad signboard in Rampart Row will invite the passer-by to visit Mr.
+Nagshett's world-renowned Serpent Tamasha, Mungoose and Cobra Fight,
+Mango-tree Illusion, etc. Entrance, one rupee.
+
+
+
+
+XI
+
+
+CURES FOR SNAKE-BITE
+
+In a little book on the snakes of India, published many years ago by Dr.
+Nicholson of the Madras Medical Service, the conviction was expressed
+that the snake-charmers of Burmah knew of some antidote to the poison of
+the cobra which gave them confidence in handling it. He said that
+nothing would induce them to divulge it, but that he suspected it
+consisted in gradual inoculation with the venom itself. Putting the
+question to himself why he did not attempt to attest this by experiment,
+he replied that there were two reasons, which, if I recollect rightly,
+were, first, that he had a strong natural repugnance to anything like
+cruelty to animals, and, secondly, that he had observed that as soon as
+a man got the notion into his head that he had discovered a cure for
+snake-bite, he began to show symptoms of insanity.
+
+It is rather remarkable that, after so many years, another Scottish
+doctor, not in Madras, but in Edinburgh, has proved, by just such
+experiments as Dr. Nicholson shrank from, that an "aged and previously
+sedate horse" may, by gradual inoculation with cobra poison, be
+rendered so thoroughly proof against it that a dose which would suffice
+to kill ten ordinary horses only imparts "increased vigour and
+liveliness" to it. Further, Dr. Fraser has found that the serum of the
+blood of an animal thus rendered proof against poison is itself an
+antidote capable of combating that poison after it has been at work for
+thirty minutes in the veins of a rabbit, and arresting its effects. And
+all this has been achieved without apparent detriment to the
+distinguished doctor's sanity.
+
+This must be intensely interesting intelligence to Englishmen throughout
+India, and joyful intelligence too, for, scoff as we may at the danger
+of being bitten by a poisonous snake, nobody likes to think that, if
+such a thing _should_ happen to him (and very narrow escapes sometimes
+remind us that it may), there would be nothing for him to do but to lie
+down and die. And so, ever since the Honourable East India Company was
+chartered, the antidote to snake poison has been a sort of philosopher's
+stone, sought after by doctors and men of science along many lines of
+investigation. And every now and then somebody has risen up and
+announced that he has found it, and has had disciples for a season.
+
+But one remedy after another, though it might give startling results in
+the laboratory, has proved to be useless in common life, and the
+majority of Englishmen have long since resigned themselves to the
+conclusion that there is no practical cure for the bite of a poisonous
+snake. For what avails it to carry about in your travelling bag a phial
+of strong ammonia and to live in more jeopardy of death by asphyxiation
+than you ever were by snakes, unless you have some guarantee that, when
+it is your fate to be bitten by a snake, the phial will be at hand? For
+ammonia must act on the venom before the venom has had time to act upon
+you, or it will only add another pain to your end; and that gives only a
+few minutes to go upon. So with nitric acid and every agent that
+operates by neutralising the poison and not by counteracting its
+effects. And this has been the character of all the remedies hitherto
+put forward. "They are," says Sir Joseph Fayrer, "absolutely without any
+specific effect on the condition produced by the poison."
+
+But "anti-venene," as Dr. Fraser calls his immunised blood-serum,
+follows the poison into the system, even after the fatal symptoms have
+begun to show themselves, and arrests them at once. So the Anglo-Indian
+may throw away his ammonia phial and, arming himself with another of
+anti-venene and a hypodermic syringe, feel that he is safe against an
+accident which will never happen. As for the man who is not nervous, he
+will speak of the new antidote, and think of it as most interesting and
+valuable, and go on his way as before with no expectation of ever being
+bitten by a venomous snake. The medical man of every degree will order
+a supply as soon as it is to be had, and conscientiously try to stamp
+out the smouldering hope within him that somebody in the station will
+soon be bitten by a cobra and give him a chance.
+
+Among the dusky millions of India Dr. Fraser's discovery will create no
+"catholic ravishment" because they will not hear of it. And if they did
+hear of it they would regard his labours as misapplied and the result as
+superfluous. For the Hindu has never shared the Englishman's opinion
+that there is no cure for snake-bite. On the contrary, he is assured
+that there are not one or two but many specifics for the bite of every
+kind of snake, known to those whose business it is to know them. If they
+are not invariably efficacious, it is for the simple reason that if a
+man's time has come to die he will die. But if his time has not come to
+die they will not fail to cure him, and since no man can know when he is
+bitten whether his time has come or not, he will lay the odds against
+Fate by trying, not one or another of them, but as many as he can hear
+of or get. Some of them are drastic in their effects, and so it too
+often proves that the poor man's time has indeed come, for though he
+might survive the snake he succumbs to the cure.
+
+It is many years now since the news was brought to me one day that a man
+whom I knew very well had been bitten by a deadly serpent and was dying.
+He was a fine, strongly built young fellow, a Mohammedan, in the employ
+of a Parsee liquor distiller, in whose godown he was arranging firewood
+when he was bitten in the foot. Without looking at the snake he rushed
+out and, falling on his face on the ground, implored the bystanders to
+take care of his wife and children as he was a dead man. The news spread
+and all the village ran together. The man was taken to an open room in
+his employer's premises and vigorous measures for his recovery were set
+on foot, in which his employer's family and servants, his own friends
+and as many of the general public as chose to look in, were allowed to
+take part.
+
+First of all, some jungle men were called in, for the man of the jungle
+must naturally know more about snakes than other men. These were
+probably Katkurrees, an aboriginal race, who live by woodcutting,
+hunting and other sylvan occupations. They proved to be practical men
+and at once sucked the wound. An intelligent Havildar of the Customs
+Department, who chanced to be present, then lanced the wound slightly to
+let the blood flow, and tied the leg tightly in two places above it.
+This was admirable. If what the jungle men and the Havildar did were
+always and promptly done whenever a man is bitten by a snake, few such
+accidents would end fatally.
+
+But this poor man's friends did not stop there. A supply of chickens had
+been procured with all haste, and these were scientifically applied.
+This is a remedy in which the natives have great faith, and I have known
+Europeans who were convinced of its efficacy. The manner of its
+application scarcely admits of description in these pages, but the
+effect is that the chickens absorb the poison and die, while the man
+lives. The number of chickens required is a gauge of the virulence of
+the serpent, for as soon as the venom is all extracted they cease to
+die. Nobody, however, could tell me how many chickens perished in this
+case. They were all too busy to stop and note the result of one remedy
+while another remained untried. And there were many yet.
+
+Somebody suggested that the venom should be dislodged from the patient's
+stomach, so an emetic was administered in the form of a handful of
+common salt, with immediate and seismic effect. Then a decoction of
+_neem_ leaves was poured down the man's throat. The _neem_ tree is an
+enemy of all fevers and a friend of man generally, so much so that it is
+healthful to sleep under its shade. Therefore a decoction of the leaves
+could not fail to be beneficial in one way or another. The residue of
+the leaves was well rubbed into the crown of the man's head for more
+direct effect on the brains in case they might be affected. Something
+else was rubbed in under the root of the tongue.
+
+In the meantime a man with some experience in exorcism had brought twigs
+of a tree of well-ascertained potency in expelling the devil, and
+advised that, in view of the known connection between serpents and
+Satan, it would be well to try beating the patient with these. The
+advice was taken, and many stripes were laid upon him. Massage was also
+tried, and other homely expedients, such as bandaging and thumping with
+the fists, were not neglected.
+
+It was about noon when I was told of the accident, and I went down at
+once and found the poor man in a woeful state, as well he might be after
+such rough handling as he had suffered for four consecutive hours; but
+he was quite conscious and there was neither pain nor swelling in the
+bitten foot. I remonstrated most vigorously, pointing out that the
+snake, which nobody had seen, might not have been a venomous one at all,
+that there were no symptoms of poisoning, except such as might also be
+explained by the treatment the man had suffered at the hands of his
+friends, and that, in short, I could see no reason to think he was going
+to die unless they were determined to kill him.
+
+My words appeared to produce a good effect on the Parsees at least, and
+they consented to stop curing the man and let him rest, giving him such
+stimulating refreshment as he would take, for he was a pious Mussulman
+and would not touch wine or spirits. I said what I could to cheer him
+up, and went away hoping that I had saved a human life. Alas! In an hour
+or so a friend came in with a root of rare virtue and persuaded the man
+to swallow some preparation of it. _Post hoc_, whether _propter hoc_ I
+dare not say, he became unconscious and sank. Before night he was
+buried.
+
+All this did not happen in some obscure village in a remote jungle. It
+happened within a mile and a half of a town controlled by a municipal
+corporation which enjoys the rights and privileges of "local
+self-government." In that town there was a dispensary, with a very
+capable assistant-surgeon in charge, and in that dispensary I doubt not
+you would have found a bottle of strong _liquor ammoniæ_ and a printed
+copy of the directions issued by a paternal Government for the recovery
+of persons bitten by venomous serpents. But when the man was bitten the
+one thing which occurred to nobody was to take him there, and when I
+heard of the matter the assistant-surgeon had just left for a distant
+place, passing on his way the gate of the house in which the man lay.
+This was a bad case, but there is little reason to hope that it was
+altogether exceptional. I am afraid there can be no question at all that
+hundreds of the deaths put down to snake-bite by village punchayets
+every year might with more truth be registered as "cured to death."
+
+
+
+
+XII
+
+
+THE COBRA BUNGALOW
+
+A STORY OF A MONEYLENDER
+
+Beharil Surajmul was the greatest moneylender in Dowlutpoor. He was a
+man of rare talents. He remembered the face of every man who had at any
+time come to borrow money of him since he began to work, as a little
+boy, in his father's office, so that it was impossible to deceive him.
+He had also such a miraculous skill in the making out of accounts that a
+poor man who had come to him in extremity for a loan of fifty rupees, to
+meet the expenses of his daughter's marriage, might go on making
+payments for the remainder of his life without reducing the debt by one
+rupee. In fact, it seemed to increase with each payment.
+
+And if the matter went into court, Beharilal never failed to show that
+there was still a balance due to him much larger than the original loan.
+But so courteous and pleasant was the Seth in his manner to all that
+such matters never went into court until the right time, of which he was
+an infallible judge, for he knew the private affairs of every family in
+Dowlutpoor. Then a decree was obtained and the debtor's house, or land,
+was sold to defray the debt, Beharilal himself being usually the
+purchaser, though not, of course, in his own name, for he was a prudent
+man.
+
+By these means Beharilal had become possessed of large estates, which he
+managed with such skill that they yielded to him revenues which they had
+never yielded to the former owners of them, while his tenants, who were
+mostly former owners, grew daily more deeply involved in their pecuniary
+obligations to him, and therefore entertained no thought of leaving him,
+for he could put them into prison any day if he chose. Their contentment
+gave him great satisfaction, and he treated them with benevolence,
+giving them advances of money for all their necessary expenses and
+appropriating the whole of their crops at the harvest to repay himself.
+He bound them to buy all that they had need of at his shop, so that he
+made profit off them on both sides.
+
+And as his wealth increased, his person increased with it and his
+appearance became more imposing, so that he was regarded everywhere with
+the highest respect and esteem. He was, moreover, a very religious man
+and charitable beyond most. By early risers he might be seen in his
+garden seeking out the nests of ants and giving them, with his own
+hands, their daily dole of rice. It was his benevolent thoughtfulness
+which had supplied drinking troughs for the flocks of pigeons that
+continually plundered the stores of the other grain merchants. He had
+also established a pinjrapole for aged, sickly and ownerless animals of
+all kinds. To this he required all his tenants to send their bullocks
+when they became unfit for work, and he sold them new cattle, good and
+strong, at prices fixed by himself. If any of his old debtors, when
+reduced to beggary, came to his door for alms, they were never sent away
+without a handful of rice or a copper coin. He kept a bag of the
+smallest copper coins always at hand for such purposes.
+
+Beharilal had a fine house, designed by himself and surrounded by a vast
+garden stocked with mangoes, guavas, custard apples, oranges and other
+fruit trees, and made beautiful and fragrant with all manner of flowers.
+The cool shade drew together birds of many kinds from the dry plains of
+the surrounding country, and it pleased Beharilal to think that they
+also were recipients of his bounty and that the benefits which he
+conferred on them would certainly be entered to the credit of his
+account with Heaven.
+
+Some he fed, such as the crows, which flocked about the back door, like
+a convocation of Christian padres, in the morning and afternoon, when
+the ladies of his family gave out their portion of boiled rice and ghee.
+The pigeons also came together in hundreds in an open space under the
+shade of a noble peepul tree, where grain was thrown out for them at
+three o'clock every day; and among them were many chattering sparrows
+and not a few green parrots, which walked quaintly among the bustling
+pigeons, their long tails moving from side to side like the pointer of
+the scale on which the Bunia weighed his rupees. This resemblance struck
+him as he reclined against the fat red cushion in his verandah summing
+up his gains. There were other birds which would not eat his food, but
+found abundance, suited to their respective castes, among the shrubs and
+trees that he had planted. Mynas walked eagerly on the lawns looking for
+grasshoppers, glittering sunbirds hovered over the flowers, thrusting
+their slender bills into each nectar-laden blossom, bulbuls twittered
+among the mulberries and the koel made the shady banian tree resound
+with its melodious notes.
+
+In a remote corner of the garden, under the dark shade of a tamarind,
+there stood a small shrine, like a whitewashed tomb, with a niche or
+recess on one side of it containing a conical stone smeared with red
+ochre. Some called it Mahadeo and some Khandoba, but no one could
+explain the presence of a Mahratta god in a Bunia's garden in
+Dowlutpoor, except by quoting an old tradition about one Narayen who had
+come from the Mahratta country and lived for many years in this place.
+Some said he was a prosperous goldsmith of great piety, but others
+maintained that he was a Sunyasee, or saint, and there was no certainty
+in the matter. The one point on which all were agreed was the great
+sanctity of the shrine, and Beharilal was most careful to perform at it
+every ceremony which custom, or tradition, sanctioned for placating the
+god and averting any calamity that might arise from his displeasure.
+
+At the base of one of the old cracked walls of the shrine there was a
+hole which was the den of a very large, black cobra. Several times it
+had been seen in the garden, and, when pursued, had glided into this
+hole and escaped. When Beharilal first heard of it he was much troubled
+in his mind, but, having consulted a Brahmin, he gave strict injunctions
+that the reptile should not be molested, and since that time he had
+never failed to place an offering of milk near to the hole in the
+morning and in the evening.
+
+Now it happened that at this time there was in Dowlutpoor an English
+doctor who was generally known as the Jadoo-walla Saheb, because he was
+believed to practise sorcery and had some mysterious need of snakes.
+Perhaps he was only making experiments with their venom. At any rate, he
+wanted live cobras and offered a good price for them. So when Nagoo, the
+snake-charmer, heard that there was a large one in Beharilal's garden,
+he thought he might do good business by capturing it for the Jadoo-walla
+Saheb, and at the same time demanding a reward from the timorous Bunia
+for ridding him of such a dangerous neighbour. With this intent he
+repaired to the garden with all the apparatus of his art, his flat
+snake baskets, his mongoose and his crooked pipe. Having reconnoitred
+the ground, he commenced operations by sitting down on his hams and
+producing such ear-splitting strains from the crooked pipe as might have
+charmed Cerberus to leave his kennel at the gate of hell. Great was his
+surprise and mortification when he heard the voice of Beharilal raised
+in tones of unwonted passion and saw a stalwart Purdaisee advancing
+towards him armed with an iron-bound lathee, who, without ceremony, nay,
+with abusive epithets, hustled him and all his gear out of the garden.
+Nagoo was a snake-charmer and by nature a gipsy, and this treatment
+rankled in his dark bosom.
+
+Some weeks passed and the sun had scarcely risen when Beharilal sat in
+the ota in front of his house at his daily business, which began as soon
+as his teeth were cleaned and ended about eleven at night. The place was
+not tidy. Two or three mats were spread on the floor, a spare one was
+rolled up in a corner, several pairs of shoes were on the steps,
+umbrellas leaned against the wall, handles downwards, and a large chatty
+of drinking water stood beside them. The Bunia himself, bare-headed and
+bare-footed, sat cross-legged on a cushion, with a wooden stool in front
+of him, on which lay an open ledger of stout yellowish paper, bound in
+soft red leather and nearly two feet in length. In this he was carefully
+entering yesterday's transactions with a reed pen, which he dipped
+frequently in a brass inkpot filled with a sponge soaked in a muddy
+black fluid.
+
+Beside him sat his son, aged two years, playing with the red, lacquered
+cylinder in which he kept his reed pens. Beharilal had two girls also,
+but they were with the women folk in the interior of the house, where he
+was content they should stay. This was his only boy, the pride and joy
+of his heart. Engrossed as he was in recording his gains, he could not
+refrain from lifting his eyes now and again to feast them on that rotund
+little body, like a goblet set on two pillars. No clothing concealed the
+tense and shiny brown skin, but there were silver bracelets on the fat
+wrists and massive anklets where deep creases divided the fat little
+feet from the fat little legs, and a representation, in chased silver,
+of Eve's fig leaf hung from a silver chain which encircled the sphere
+that should have been his waist. His globular head was curiously shaven.
+From two deep pits between the bulging brow and the fat cheeks that
+nearly squeezed out the little nose between them, two black diamonds
+twinkled, full of wonder, as the small purse mouth prattled to itself
+softly and inarticulately of the mysteries of life.
+
+Suddenly a startled cry, passing into a prolonged wail of fear, roused
+old Beharilal, and he saw a sight that nearly caused him to swoon with
+terror. The little man, a moment ago so placid and happy, was shrinking
+back with "I don't like that thing" inscribed in lines of anguish on
+his distorted face, and not three feet from him a huge cobra, just
+emerged from the roll of matting, eyed him with a stony stare, its head
+raised and its hood expanded. Its quivering tongue flickered out from
+between its lips like distant flashes of forked lightning.
+
+For a moment Beharilal stood stupefied, then all the heroism that was in
+him spent itself at once. Seizing the heavy wooden stool in both his
+hands, he raised it high over his head and dashed it down on the
+reptile. The sharp edge of hard wood broke its back, and as it wriggled
+and lashed about, biting at everything within reach, the Bunia snatched
+up his boy and waddled into the house at a pace to which he had long
+been unaccustomed, calling out, in frantic gasps, for help. A rush of
+excited and screaming women met him in the inner court, and he dropped
+his precious burden, with pious ejaculations, into the arms of its
+mother, and stood panting and speechless. Then calling aloud to know if
+all danger was past, he ventured cautiously out again and saw that the
+Purdaisee and the Malee had ejected the wriggling cobra and were
+pounding its head into a jelly with a big stone.
+
+For some seconds he looked on in a strange stupor, and then he realised
+what he had done. He, Beharilal, the Bunia, who had always removed the
+insects so tenderly from his own person that they were not hurt, who had
+never committed the sin of killing a mosquito or a fly; he, with his own
+hands, had taken the life of the guardian cobra of the shrine!
+"Urray-ray! Bap-ray!" he cried, "for what demerit of mine has this
+ill-luck befallen me in my old age? What will happen now?"
+
+"Nay, Sethjkee," said the Malee, "be not afraid. It was in your destiny
+that this offspring of Satan should come to its end by your hand. We
+have pounded its head properly, so it will not return to you,"
+
+"But what of its mate?" said Beharilal. "I have heard that, if any man
+kills a cobra, its mate will follow him by day and by night until it has
+had its revenge. Is that not so?"
+
+The Malee answered, "Chh, Chh! There is no mate of this cobra," but his
+tone was not confident.
+
+"Go," cried Beharilal--"go quickly and call Nagoo, the snake-charmer. He
+has knowledge."
+
+"I will go," said the Malee, and set off at a run; but when he got out
+of the gate he lapsed into a leisurely walk, for why should a man lose
+his breath without cause? In time he found his way to the little
+settlement of huts constructed of poles and mats, where Nagoo sat on the
+ground smoking his "chillum," and told his errand.
+
+"Why should I come?" was Nagoo's reply; "I went to take away that cobra
+and the Bunia drove me from the garden with abuse. Why does he send for
+me now?"
+
+"He is a Bunia," said the Malee, as if that summed up the whole matter;
+but he added, after a pause, "If he sees a burning ground, he shakes
+like a peepul leaf. The cobra has died by his hand and his liver has
+become like water. Whatever you ask he will give. You should come,"
+
+Nagoo replied aloud, "I will come," and to himself, "I will give him
+physic." Then he took up his baskets and his pipe and followed the
+Malee.
+
+Beharilal proceeded to business with a directness foreign to his habit,
+looking over his shoulder at intervals lest a snake might be silently
+approaching. "Good Nagoo," he said, "a great misfortune has happened.
+The cobra of the shrine has been killed. Has it a mate?"
+
+"How can a cobra not have a mate?" answered Nagoo curtly.
+
+Then Beharilal employed the most insinuating of the many tones of his
+voice. "Listen, Nagoo. You are a man of skill. Capture that cobra and I
+will pay you well. I will give you five rupees." Then, observing no
+response in the wrinkled visage of the charmer, "I will give you ten
+rupees."
+
+Nagoo would have sold his revenge for a tithe of the wealth thus dangled
+before him, but he saw no reason to suppose that there was another cobra
+anywhere in the garden, so he answered with the calm confidence of an
+expert, "That cannot be done. The serpent will not heed any pipe now. In
+its mind there is only revenge."
+
+"Then what will it do?" said the trembling Bunia.
+
+"If its mate died by the hand of a man, it will follow that man until
+it has accomplished its purpose."
+
+"But how will it know," asked Beharilal, "by whose hand its mate died?"
+
+Nagoo replied with pious simplicity, "How can I tell by what means it
+knows? God informs it."
+
+"But," pleaded Beharilal, "is there no escape?--if a man goes away by
+the railway or by water?"
+
+Nagoo pondered for a moment and said, "If a man crossed the sea, the
+serpent would be baulked. If he goes by railway it will not leave him.
+Let him go to Madras, it will find him."
+
+With a faltering hand the Bunia put some rupees, uncounted, into the
+charmer's skinny palm, saying, "Go, make incantations. Do something.
+There is great knowledge of mysteries with you"; and he hurried back
+into the house.
+
+His arrangements were very soon made. His account books, with a bundle
+of bonds and hoondies and cash and his son, were put into a small cart
+drawn by a pair of fast trotting bullocks, into which he himself
+climbed, after looking under the cushion to see that there was no evil
+beast lurking there, and got away in haste while the sun was yet hot.
+The rest of the family followed with the household property, and in a
+few days the house was empty and only the Malee remained in charge. Many
+years have passed and the house is empty still, and the Malee, grown
+grey and frail, is still in charge. He gets no wages, but he sells the
+jasmine flowers and the mangoes and guavas, and he grows chillies and
+brinjals, and so fills the stomachs of himself and his little grandson
+and is contented. If you ask him where the Seth has gone, he replies,
+"Who knows?" His debt has gone with his creditor, "gone glimmering
+through the dream of things that were," and he has no desire to recall
+them.
+
+A civil or military officer from the station, taking a solitary walk,
+sometimes finds himself at the Cobra Bungalow, and turns in to wander
+among its old trees and unswept paths, obstructed by overgrown and
+untended shrubs, and wonders how it got its name. Then he pauses at the
+whitewashed shrine and notes that the god-stone has been freshly painted
+red and that chaplets of faded flowers lie before it. But the old Malee
+approaches with a meek salaam and a posy of jasmine and marigolds and
+warns him that there is a cobra in the shrine.
+
+
+
+
+XIII
+
+
+THE PANTHER I DID NOT SHOOT
+
+It was January 13 of a good many years ago, in those happy days that
+have "gone glimmering through the dream of things that were." The sun
+had scarcely risen, and I was sitting in the cosy cabin of my yacht
+enjoying my "chota hazree," which, being interpreted, means "lesser
+presence," and in Anglo-Indian speech signifies an "eye-opener" of tea
+and toast--the greater presence appears some hours later and we call it
+breakfast. I will not say that the view from my cabin windows was
+enchanting. The placid waters of the broad creek would have been
+pleasant to look upon if the level rays of the sun in his strength had
+not skimmed them with such a blinding glare, but the low, flat-topped
+hills that bounded them were forbidding.
+
+The people said truly that God had made this a country of stones, but
+they forgot that He had clothed the stones with trees of evergreen
+foliage and a dense undergrowth of shrubs and grass, to protect and hold
+together the thick bed of loam which the fallen leaves enriched from
+year to year. It was the axes of their fathers that felled the trees,
+to sell for fuel, and the billhooks of their mothers that hacked away
+the bushes and grubbed up their very roots to burn on the household
+cooking hole. Then the torrential rains of the south-west monsoon came
+down on the naked, defenceless, parched and cracked soil and swept it in
+muddy cascades down to the sea, leaving flats of bare rock, strewn thick
+with round stones, sore to the best-shod foot of man and cruel to the
+hoofs of a horse. About and among the huts of the unswept and malodorous
+hamlet just above the shore there were fine trees, mango, tamarind,
+babool and bor, showing what might have been elsewhere.
+
+On the rounded top of the highest hill frowned in black ruin an old
+Mahratta fort, covered on the top and sides and choked within by that
+dense mass of struggling vegetation which always takes possession of old
+forts in India. The weather-worn stones and crumbling mortar seem to
+feed the trees to gluttony. First some bird-drops the seeds of the
+banian fig into crevices of the ramparts, and its insidious roots push
+their way and grow and grow into great tortuous snakes, embracing the
+massive blocks of basalt, heaving them up and holding them up, so that
+they cannot fall. Then prickly shrubs and thorny trees follow, fighting
+for every inch of ground, but quite unable to eject the gently
+persistent custard-apple, descended doubtless from seeds which the
+garrison dropped as they ate the luscious fruit, on account of which the
+Portuguese introduced the tree from South America. I had penetrated
+into that fort and had seen something of the snakes and birds of night,
+but not the ghosts and demons which I was assured made it their
+habitation by day.
+
+On a level place a little below the fort stood two monuments, telling of
+the days when the Honourable East India Company maintained a "Resident"
+at this place. Here he lived in proud solitude, upholding the British
+flag. But his wife and the little one on whose face he had not yet
+looked were on their way from Bombay in a native "pattimar" to join him,
+and as he stood gazing over the sea at the red setting sun one 5th of
+October, he thought of the glad to-morrow and the end of his dreary
+loneliness. It fell to him to put up one of these monuments, with a
+sorrowful inscription to all that was left to him on the following
+morning, the "memory" of a beloved wife and an infant thirty-one days
+old, drowned in crossing the bar on October 6, 1853.
+
+ We have strewed our best to the weeds unrest,
+ To the shark and the sheering gull.
+ If blood be the price of admiralty,
+ Lord God, we ha' paid in full.
+
+I carried my gun and rifle with me in my yacht. They served to keep up
+my character as a sportsman, and did not often require to be cleaned. So
+the morning calm of my mind was lashed into an unwonted tempest of
+excitement when my jolly skipper, Sheikh Abdul Rehman, came in and told
+me briefly that a "bag" (which word does not rhyme with rag, but must
+be pronounced like barg without the _r_ and signifies a tiger or
+panther) had killed a cow in the village the night before last.
+
+When he added that the villagers had set a spring gun for it last
+evening and it had returned to the "kill" and been badly wounded, my
+excitement was turned into wrath. I had been at anchor here all
+yesterday. The Indian ryot everywhere turns instinctively to the _sahib_
+as his protector against all wild beasts. What did these men mean by
+keeping their own counsel and setting an infernal machine for their
+enemy? Abdul Rehman explained, and the explanation was simple and
+sufficient. My fat predecessor in the appointment that I held had no
+relish for sport and kept no guns, so the simple villagers, when they
+saw my boat with its familiar flag, looked for no help from that
+quarter. However, I might still win renown off that wounded "bag," if it
+was not a myth; but, to tell the truth, I was sceptical. The tiger and
+the panther are not nomads on rocky plains, like the antelope. I landed,
+notwithstanding, promptly and visited the scene. Sure enough, there was
+a young heifer lying on its side, with the unmistakable deep pits where
+the jaws of the panther had gripped its throat, and a gory cavity where
+it had selected a gigot for its dinner.
+
+Round the corpse the villagers had arranged a circular fence of thorns,
+with one opening, across which they had stretched a cord, attached at
+the other end to the trigger of an old shooting iron of some sort,
+charged with slugs and looking hard at the opening. The gun had gone off
+during the night, and the ground was soaked with blood. A few yards off
+there was another great swamp of blood. The beast had staggered away and
+lain down for a while, faint and sick. Then it had got up and crawled
+home, still dripping with blood, by which we tracked it for a good
+distance, but the trace grew gradually fainter and at last ceased
+altogether.
+
+"It has gone to the fort," said the men--"bags always go to the fort." I
+pointed out that, if it had meant to go to the fort, it would have gone
+towards the fort, instead of in another direction; but the argument did
+not move them. "The fort is a jungle, and where else should a 'bag' take
+refuge but in a jungle?" However, I was obstinate, and pursued the
+original direction until we arrived at the brow of the hill, where it
+sloped steeply down to the sea. The whole slope, for half a mile, was
+covered with a dense scrub of Lantana bushes. This is another plant
+introduced in some by-gone century from South America, and planted first
+in gardens for its profuse clusters of red and pink verbena-like
+blossoms (it is a near relation of the garden verbena), whence it has
+spread like the rabbit in New Zealand, and become a nuisance. "There," I
+cried, pointing at the scrub, "there, without doubt, your wounded 'bag'
+is lying."
+
+Some of the men, unbelieving still, were amusing themselves by rolling
+large stones down the slope, when suddenly there was a sound of
+scrambling, and across an opening in the scrub, in sight of us all, a
+huge hyaena scurried away "on three legs." I sent a man post-haste for
+my rifle, which I had not brought with me, never expecting to require it
+until a regular campaign could be arranged. As soon as it arrived, we
+formed in line and advanced, throwing stones in all directions.
+
+Make no offering of admiration at the shrine of our hardihood, for we
+were in no peril. Among carnivorous beasts there is not a more
+contemptible poltroon than the hyaena, even when wounded. A friend of
+mine once tied up a billy goat as a bait for a panther and sat up over
+it in a tree. In the middle of the night a hyaena nosed it from afar,
+and came sneaking up in the rear, for hyaenas love the flesh of goats
+next to that of dogs. But the goat saw it, and, turning about bravely,
+presented his horned front. This the hyaena could not find stomach to
+face. For two hours he manoeuvred to take the goat in rear, but it
+turned as he circled, and stood up to him stoutly till the dawn came,
+and my friend cut short its disreputable career with a bullet.
+
+To return to my story, we had not gone far when, on a lower level, not
+many yards from me, I was suddenly confronted by that repulsive,
+ghoulish physiognomy which can never be forgotten when once seen, the
+smoky-black snout, broad forehead and great upstanding ears. Instantly
+the beast wheeled and scrambled over a bank, receiving a hasty rear
+shot which, as I afterwards found, left it but one limb to go with, for
+the bullet passed clean through a hindleg and lodged in a foreleg. It
+went on, however, and some time passed before I descried it far off
+dragging itself painfully across an open space. A careful shot finished
+it, and it died under a thick bush, where we found it and dragged it
+out. It proved to be a large male, measuring 4 feet 7 inches, from which
+something over a foot must be deducted for its shabby tail.
+
+The natives all maintained still that their cow had been killed by a
+panther, saying that the hyaena had come on the second night, after
+their manner, to fill its base belly with the leavings. And there was
+some circumstantial evidence in favour of this view. In the first place,
+I never heard of a hyaena having the audacity to attack a cow; in the
+second, the tooth-marks on the cow showed that it had been executed
+according to the tradition of all the great cats--by seizing its throat
+and breaking its neck; and in the third, a hyaena, sitting down to such
+a meal, would certainly have begun with calf's head and crunched up
+every bone of the skull before thinking of sirloin or rumpsteak. But the
+absurdity of a panther being found in such a region outweighed all this
+and I scoffed.
+
+I was yet to learn a lesson in humility out of this adventure. Two years
+later I sailed over the bar and dropped anchor at the same spot. I was
+met with the intelligence that on the previous evening two panthers had
+been seen sitting on the brow of the hill and gazing at the beauties of
+the fading sunset, as wild beasts are so fond of doing. A night or two
+later a cow was attacked in a neighbouring field, and, staggering into
+the village, fell down and died in a narrow alley between two houses.
+The panther followed and prowled about all night, but the villagers,
+hammering at their doors with sticks, scared it from its meal.
+
+I at once had a nest put up in a small tree, and took my position in it
+at sunset. The common people in India do not waste much money on lamp
+oil, preferring to sleep during the hours appointed by Nature for the
+purpose, so it was not long before all doors were securely barred and
+quietness reigned. Then the mosquitoes awoke and came to inquire for me,
+the little bats (how I blessed them!) wheeled about my head, the
+night-jar called to his fellow, and the little owls sat on a branch
+together and talked to each other about me. Hour after hour passed, and
+it became too dark in that narrow alley to see a panther if it had come.
+So I came down and got to my boat. The panther was engaged a mile away
+dining on another cow! On further inquiry I learned that there was some
+good forest a day's journey distant, and it was quite the fashion among
+the panthers of that place to spend a weekend occasionally at a spot so
+full of all delights as this dark, jungle-smothered fort.
+
+
+
+
+XIV
+
+
+THE PURBHOO
+
+I do not believe that the Member of Parliament who moved the adjournment
+of the House to consider the culpable carelessness of the Government of
+India in allowing the Rajah of Muttighur to fall into the moat of his
+own castle when he was drunk, could have told you what a Purbhoo is, not
+though you had spelled it Prabhu, so that he could find it in his
+_Gazetteer_. Of course he saw hundreds of them during that Christmas
+which he spent in the East before he wrote his book; but then he took
+them all for Brahmins. He never noticed that the curve of their turbans
+was not the same, and the idol mark on their foreheads was quite
+different, nor even that their shoes were not forked at the toes, but
+ended in a sharp point curled upwards. And if he did not see these
+things which were on the surface, what could he know of matters that lie
+deeper?
+
+Now the first and most important thing to be known respecting the
+Purbhoo, the fundamental fact of him, is that he is not a Brahmin. If he
+were a Brahmin, one essential piece of our administrative apparatus in
+India would be wanting, and without it the whole machinery would
+assuredly go out of order. Nor is it easy to see how we could replace
+him. Not one of the other castes would serve even as a makeshift. They
+are all too far removed from the Brahmin. But the Purbhoo is near him,
+irritatingly near him, and he has proved in practice to be just the sort
+of homoeopathic remedy we require, the counter-irritant, the outward
+blister by wise application of which we can keep down the internal
+inflammation.
+
+In speaking of the Brahmin as an inflammation in the body politic I
+disown all offensive and invidious implications. I am only using a
+convenient simile. You may reverse it if you like and make the disease
+stand for the Purbhoo, in which case the Brahmin will be the blister.
+Which way fits the facts best will depend upon which caste chances at
+the time to be nearest to the vitals of Government.
+
+The case stands thus. Before the days of British rule the Brahmin was
+the priest and man of letters, the "clerke" in short. The rajahs and
+chiefs were much of the same mind as old Douglas:
+
+ Thanks to Saint Bothan son of mine,
+ Save Gawain, ne'er could pen a line,
+
+Gawain being a bishop. As a Mohammedan gentleman related to one of the
+ruling Indian princes put the matter when speaking to me a few years
+ago, "In those days none of us could write. Our pen was the sword. If
+any writing had to be done the Brahmin was called in." And no doubt he
+did excellent service, being diligent, astute, and withal pliant and
+diplomatic. If to these qualities he added ambition, he might, and often
+did, become a Cardinal Wolsey in the state. In Poona, for example, the
+Brahmin Prime Minister gradually overshadowed the Mahratta king, and the
+descendant of Shivajee was put on a back shelf as Rajah of Sattara,
+while the Peishwa ruled at the capital.
+
+Of course this carnal advancement was not gained without some sacrifice
+of his spiritual character, and the "secular" Brahmin had to bow, _quoad
+sacra_, to the penniless Bhut, or "regular" Brahmin, who, refusing to
+contaminate his sanctity by doing any kind of work, ate of the temple,
+or lived by royal bounty or private charity, and by the free breakfasts
+without which a marriage, "thread ceremony" or funeral in a gentleman's
+house could not be respectably celebrated. Idleness and sanctity are a
+powerful combination, and it is written in the _shastras_ that every day
+in which a holy man does no work for his bread, but lives by begging, is
+equal in the eyes of the gods to a day spent in fasting; so, though the
+prospect of power and wealth might tempt a few restless and wayward
+spirits, the great mass of the Brahmin caste clung to the sacred
+calling.
+
+All this time the Purbhoo was in the land, but insignificant. He had no
+sacred calling. Tradition assigned him a hybrid origin. He could not
+presume to be a warrior, because his mother was a _shoodra_, nor could
+he condescend to be a farmer, for his father was a _kshutriya_. So the
+gods had given him the pen, and he was a writer--not a secretary, but a
+humble quill-driver. But when the Portuguese and then the British came
+upon the scene, not ruling by word of mouth, like the native rajahs, but
+inditing their orders and keeping records, the Purbhoo saw an open door
+and went in.
+
+Then the Brahmin woke up, for he saw that he was in evil case. The
+spirit of the British _raj_ was falling like a blight and a pestilence
+upon the means by which he had lived, drying up the fountains of
+religious revenue and slowly but surely blighting the luxuriance of that
+pious liberality which always took the form of feeding holy men. He
+found that he must work for his bread whether he liked it or not, and
+the only implement of secular work that would not soil his priestly hand
+was the pen. And this was already taken up by the Purbhoo, who carried
+himself haughtily under the new _regime_ and showed no mind to make way
+for the holier man. Hence sprang those bitter enmities and jealousies
+which have done so much to lighten the difficulties of our position.
+
+The British Government has often been accused of acting on the maxim,
+_Divide et impera_. It is a libel. We do not divide, for there is no
+need. Division is already there. We have only to rejoice and rule. How
+well and justly we rule all the world knows, but only the initiated know
+how much we owe to the fact that the talents and energies which would
+otherwise be employed in thwarting our just intentions and
+phlebotomising the ryot are largely preoccupied with the more useful
+work of thwarting and undermining each other.
+
+What could a collector do single-handed against a host of clerks and
+subordinate magistrates and petty officials of every grade, all armed
+with the awfulness of a heaven-born sanctity, all hedged round with the
+prestige of an ancient supremacy, endowed with a mole-like genius for
+underground work which the Englishman never fathoms, and all leagued
+together to suck to the uttermost the life blood of those inferior
+castes which were created expressly for their advantage?
+
+_He_ is working in a foreign language, among customs and ways of thought
+which it takes a lifetime to understand: _they_ are using their mother
+tongue and handling matters that they have known from childhood. _He_
+cannot tell a lie and is ashamed to deceive: _they_ are trained in a
+thrifty policy which saves the truth for a last resort in case
+everything else should fail. He would be helpless in their hands as a
+sucking child. But he knows they will do for him what he cannot do for
+himself. The Purbhoo will lie in wait for the Brahmin, and the Brahmin
+will keep his lynx eye on the Purbhoo. And woe to the one who trips
+first. So the collector arranges his men with judicious skill to the
+fostering of each other's virtue, and the result is most gratifying.
+The country blesses his administration, and his subordinates are equally
+surprised and delighted at their own integrity.
+
+I speak of a wise and able administrator. There are men in the Indian
+Civil Service who are neither wise nor able, and some who are not
+administrators at all, having most unhappily mistaken their vocation.
+When such a one becomes collector of a district his _chitnis_, or chief
+secretary, sees that that tide in the affairs of men has come which,
+"taken at the flood, leads on to fortune," and his caste-fellows all
+through the service are filled with unholy joy. But he does nothing rash
+or hasty. Wilily and patiently he goes to work to make his own
+foundation sure first of all. He studies his chief under all conditions,
+discovers his little foibles and vanities and feeds them sedulously. He
+masters codes, rules and regulations, standing orders, precedents and
+past correspondence, till it is dangerous to contradict him and always
+safe to trust him. In every difficulty he is at hand, clearing away
+perplexity and refreshing the "swithering" mind with his precision and
+assurance. He becomes indispensable. The collector reposes absolute
+confidence in him and is proud to say so in his reports.
+
+Then the _chitnis_, if he is a Brahmin, addresses himself to the task of
+eliminating the Purbhoo from the service, or at least depriving him of
+place and power. It is a delicate task, but the Brahmin's touch is
+light. He never disparages a Purbhoo from that day; "damning with faint
+praise" is safer and as effectual. He practises the charity which
+covereth a multitude of faults, but he leaves a tag end of one peeping
+out to attract curiosity, and if the collector asks questions, he is
+candid and tells the truth, though with manifest reluctance. Then he
+grapples with the gradation lists, which have fallen into confusion, and
+puts them into such excellent order that the collector can see at a
+glance every man's past services and present claims to promotion. And
+from these lists it appears that clearly, whenever any vacancy has to be
+filled, a Brahmin has the first claim. And so, as the shades of night
+yield to the dawn of day, the Purbhoo by degrees fades away and
+disappears, and the star of the Brahmin rises and shines everywhere with
+still increasing splendour.
+
+But the Purbhoo possesses his soul in patience, and keeps a note of
+every slip that the Brahmin makes. For the next _chitnis_ may be a
+Purbhoo, and then the day of reckoning will come and old scores will be
+paid off. The Brahmin knows that too, and the thought of it makes him
+walk warily even in the day of his prosperity. Thus our administration
+is saved from utter corruption.
+
+
+
+
+XV
+
+
+THE COCONUT TREE
+
+Among the classic fairy-tales which passed like shooting stars across
+those dark hours of our boyhood in which we wrestled with the grim
+rudiments of Latin and Greek, and which abide in the memory after nearly
+all that they helped to brighten has passed away, there was one which
+related to a contest between Neptune and Minerva as to which should
+confer the greatest benefit on the human race. Neptune first struck his
+trident on the ground (or was it on the waves? "Eheu fugaces"--no, that
+also is gone), and there sprang forth a noble steed, pawing the ground,
+terrible in war and no less useful in peace. Then the watery god leaned
+back and smiled as if he would say, "Now, beat that." But the Goddess of
+Wisdom brought out of the earth a modest, dark tree bearing olives and,
+in classic phrase, "took the cake," Oriental mythology is more luxuriant
+and fantastic than that of the West, but I do not know if it has any
+legend parallel to this. If it has, then I am sure the palm is awarded
+to the deity who gave to the human race the tree that bears the coconut.
+
+Passing a confectioner's shop, I saw a tempting packet labelled
+"Cokernut Toffee." I bought a pennyworth and gave it to my little girl,
+and
+
+ "I laye a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge."
+
+How many boys and girls are there in this kingdom to whom the word
+coconut connotes an ingredient which goes to the making of a very
+toothsome sweetie? And how many confectioners and shop girls are there
+whose idea is no broader? Again:
+
+ "I laye a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge,
+ And merrie sang the Birde as she sat upon the spraye."
+
+And I said, "Little Bird, what do you know of the coconut?" And it made
+answer, "It is a cup full of food, rich and sweet, which kind hands hang
+out for me in winter," How narrow may be the key-hole through which we
+take our outlook on things human and divine, never doubting that we see
+the whole! In our own British Empire, only a few thousand miles away,
+sits a mild Hindu, almost unclad and wholly unlettered, to whom the tree
+that bore the fruit that flavoured the toffee that my little girl is
+enjoying seems to be one of the predominating tints of the whole
+landscape of life. It puts a roof over his head, it lightens his
+darkness, it helps to feed his body, it furnishes the wine that maketh
+glad his heart and the oil that causeth his face to shine, and time
+would fail me to tell of all the other things that it does for him. As a
+type and symbol, it is always about him, spanning the sunshine and
+shower of life with bows of hope.
+
+The coconut tree is a palm, and has nothing to do with cocoa of the
+breakfast table. That word is a perversion of "cacao," and came to us
+from Mexico: the other is the Portuguese word "coco," which means a nut.
+It is what Vasco da Gama called the thing when he first saw it, and the
+word, with our English translation added, has stuck to it. The tree is,
+I need scarcely say, a palm, one of many kinds that flourish in India.
+But none of them can be ranked with it. The rough date palm makes dense
+groves on sandy plains, but brings no fruit to perfection, pining for
+something which only Arabia can supply; the strong but unprofitable
+"brab," or fan palm, rises on rocky hills, the beautiful fish-tailed
+palm in forests solitarily, while the "areca" rears its tall, smooth
+stem and delicate head in gardens and supplies millions with a solace
+more indispensable than tobacco or tea. But the coconut loves a sandy
+soil and the salt breath of the sea and the company of its own kind. The
+others grow erect as a mast, but the gentle coconuts lean on the wind
+and mingle the waving of their sisterly arms, casting a grateful shade
+on the humble folk who live under their blessing.
+
+To the mariner sailing by India's coral strand that country presents the
+aspect of an endless beach of shell sand, quite innocent of coral, on
+which the surf breaks continually into dazzling white foam against a
+dark background of pensive palms. He might naturally suppose that they
+had grown up of themselves, like the screw-pines and aloes which
+sometimes share the beach with them; but that would be a great mistake.
+Everyone of them has been planted and carefully watered for years and
+manured annually with fresh foliage of forest trees buried in a moat
+round the root. And so it grew in stature, but not in girth, until its
+head was sixty, seventy or even eighty feet above the ground, and a
+hundred nuts of various sizes hung in bunches from long, shiny, green
+arms, each as thick as a man's, which had thrust themselves out from
+between the lower fronds.
+
+There is no production of Nature that I know of less negotiable than a
+coconut as the tree presents it. The man who first showed the way into
+it deserved a place in mythology with Prometheus, Jason and other heroes
+of the dawn. There is a crab, I know, which lives on coconuts, enjoying
+the scientific name of _Birgus latro_, the Burglar; but it seems to be a
+special invention, as big as a cat and armed with two fearful pairs of
+pincers in front for rending the outside casings of the fruits, and a
+more delicate tool on its hind-legs for picking out the meat. Other
+animals have to do without it, as had man, I opine, in the stone and
+copper ages. With the iron age came a chopper, called in Western India a
+"koita," with which he can hack his way through most of the obstructions
+of life. When, with this, he has slashed off the tough outer rind and
+the inch-thick packing of agglutinated fibres, like metal wires, he has
+only to crack the hard shell which contains the kernel.
+
+How little we can conceive the spaces in his life that would be empty
+without that firm pulp, at once nutritious, sweet and fragrant! Curry
+cannot be made without it, the cook cannot advance three steps in its
+absence, pattimars laden with it are sailing north, south, east and
+west, a thousand creaky wooden mills are squeezing the limpid oil out of
+it, a hundred thousand little earthen lamps filled with that oil are
+making visible the smoky darkness of hut and temple, brightening the
+wedding feast and illuminating the sad page over which the candidate for
+university honours nods his shaven head. That oil fed lighthouses of the
+first order and illuminated viceregal balls and durbars before paraffin
+and kerosene inundated the earth. And it has other uses. For arresting
+premature baldness and preventing the hair turning grey its virtues are
+equalled by no other oil known to us, and there is a fortune awaiting
+the hairdresser who can find means effectually to remove or suppress its
+peculiar and penetrating odour. Joao Gomez, my faithful "boy," did not
+object to the odour, and when he had been tempted to pass my comb
+through his raven locks as he was dusting my dressing table, I always
+knew it.
+
+When the white kernel has been turned to account, the utilities of the
+coconut are not exhausted. The shell, neatly bisected, makes a pair of
+teacups, and either of these, fitted with a wooden handle, makes a handy
+spoon. Laurenco de Gama demands one or two of these inexpensive spoons
+to complete the furnishing of my kitchen. As for the obstinate casing
+that wraps the coconut shell, it is an article of commerce. It must
+first be soaked for some months in a pit on the slimy bank of the
+backwater, until all the stuff that holds it together in a stiff and
+obdurate mass has rotted away and set free those hard and smooth fibres
+which nothing can rot. These, when thoroughly purged of the foul black
+pollution in which they have sweltered so long, will go out to all
+quarters of the world under the name of "coir" to make indestructible
+door mats and other indispensable things. It will penetrate to every
+corner of India in which a white man lives, to mat his verandahs and
+stuff his mattresses.
+
+And who shall recount a tithe of its other uses? Of course, the nude man
+under the coconut tree knows nothing of all this. He does without a
+mattress, and has no use for a door mat. But he cannot do without
+cordage, and if you took from him his coconut fibre, life would almost
+stop. Wherewith would he bind the rafters of his hut to the beams, or
+tether the cow, or let down the bucket into the well? What would all the
+boats do that traverse the backwater, or lie at anchor in the bay, or
+line the sandy beach? From the cable of the great pattimar, now getting
+under weigh for the Persian Gulf with a cargo of coconuts, to the
+painter of the dugout, "hodee," every yard of cordage about them is made
+of imperishable coir.
+
+When the axe is at last laid to the old coconut tree, a beam will fall
+to the earth sixty feet in length, hard as teak and already rounded and
+smoothed. True, you cannot saw it into planks, but no one will complain
+of that in a village which does not own a saw. It cleaves readily enough
+and straightly, forming long troughs most useful for leading water from
+the well to the plantation and for many other purposes. It can also be
+chopped into lengths suitable for the ridge poles of the hut, or for
+bridges to span the deep ditches which drain the rice fields or feed the
+salt pans. When out in quest of snipe I have sometimes had to choose
+between crossing by one of those bridges, innocent of even a handrail,
+and wading through the black slough of despond which it spanned.
+Choosing neither, I went home, but the "Kolee" and the "Agree" trip over
+them like birds, balancing household chattels on their steady heads.
+
+We must not think, however, of the trunk as, at the best, anything more
+than a by-product of the coconut tree, whose head is more than its body.
+Even while it lives its head is shorn once a year, for, as fresh fronds
+push out and upward from the centre, those of the outer circle get old
+and must be cut away. And when one of those feathery, fern-like fronds,
+toying with the breeze, comes crashing to the ground, it is ten or
+twelve feet long, and consists of a great backbone, as thick at the base
+as a man's leg, with a close-set row of swords on either side, about a
+yard in length. They are hard and tough, but supple yet and of a shiny
+green colour; but they will turn to brown as they wither.
+
+Now observe that this gigantic, unmanageable-looking leaf, like
+everything else about the coconut tree, is almost a ready-made article,
+demanding no machinery to turn it to account, except the "koita" which
+hangs ever ready from the nude man's girdle. With it he will cleave the
+backbone lengthwise, and then, taking each half separately, he will
+simply twist backwards every second sword and plait them all into a mat
+two feet wide, eight or ten feet long, and firmly bounded and held
+together on one side by the unbreakable backbone. This is a "jaolee,"
+lighter than slates, or tiles, and more handy than any form of thatch.
+You have just to arrange your "jaolees" neatly on your bamboo frame,
+each overlapping the one below it, then tie them securely in their
+places with coir rope and your roof is made for a year.
+
+There is yet another benevolence of the coconut tree which I have left
+to the last, and the simple folk of whom I am trying to write with
+fellow feeling would certainly have named it first. I ought to refer to
+it as a curse: they, without qualm or question, call it a blessing. Let
+me try to describe it dispassionately. If you wander in any palm grove
+in Western India, looking upward, it will soon strike you that a large
+number of the trees do not seem to bear coconuts at all, but black
+earthen pots. If your visit should chance to be made early in the
+morning, or late in the afternoon, the mystery will soon be revealed.
+You will see a dusky, sinewy figure, not of a monkey, but of a man,
+ascending and descending those trees with marvellous celerity and ease,
+grasping the trunks with his hands and fitting his naked feet into
+slight notches cut in them. The distance between the notches is so great
+that his knee goes up to his chin at each step, but he is as supple as
+he is sinewy and feels no inconvenience. For he is a Bhundaree, or
+Toddy-drawer, and his forefathers have been Bhundarees since the time, I
+suppose, when Manu made his immortal laws.
+
+His waistcloth is tightly girded about him, in his hand he carries a
+broad billhook as bright and keen as a razor, and from his caudal region
+depends a tail more strange than any borne by beast or reptile. It looks
+like a large brown pot, constructed in the middle. It is, in fact, a
+large gourd, or calabash, hanging by a hook from the climber's
+waistband. When he has reached the top of a tree, he gets among the
+branches and, sitting astride of one of them, proceeds to detach one of
+the black pots from the stout fruit stem on which it is fastened, and
+empty its contents into his tail. Then, taking his billhook, he
+carefully pares the raw end of the stem, refastens the black pot in its
+place and hurries down to make the ascent of another tree, and so on
+until his tail is full of a foaming white liquor spotted with drowned
+honey bees and filling the surrounding air with a rank odour of
+fermentation. This liquor is "toddy."
+
+If I were a Darwin I would not leave that word until I had traced the
+agencies which wafted it over sea and land from the shores of Hindustan
+to the Scottish coast, where it first took root and, quickly adapting
+itself to a strange environment, developed into a new and vigorous
+species, spread like the thistle and became a national institution. At
+first it was only the Briton's way of mouthing a common native word,
+"tadi" (pronounced ta-dee), which meant palm juice; but it became
+current in its present shape as early as 1673, when the traveller Fryer
+wrote of "the natives singing and roaring all night long, being drunk
+with toddy, the wine of the cocoe." About a century later Burns sang,
+
+ The lads and lasses, blythely bent,
+ To mind baith saul and body,
+ Sit round the table, weel content,
+ And steer about the toddy.
+
+Between these I can find no vestigia, but imagination easily fills the
+gap. I see a company of jovial Scots, met in Calcutta, or Surat, on St.
+Andrew's Day. European wines and beer are expensive, whisky not
+obtainable at all; but the skilful khansamah makes up a punch with toddy
+spirit, hot water, sugar and limes, and they are "well content." After
+many years I see the few of them who still survive foregathered again in
+the old country, and one proposes to have a good brew of toddy for auld
+lang syne. If real toddy spirit cannot be had, what of that? Whisky is
+found to take very kindly to hot water and sugar and limes, and the old
+folks at home and the neighbours and the minister himself pronounce a
+most favourable verdict on "toddy." In short, it has come to stay. But
+we must return to the liquor in the Bhundaree's gourd. It is the rich
+sap which should have gone to the forming of coconuts, which is
+intercepted by cutting off the point of the fruit stalk and tying on an
+earthen pot. If the pot is clean, the juice, when it is taken down in
+the morning, not fermented yet but just beginning to sparkle with minute
+bubbles, not too sweet and not so oily as the milk of the coconut, is
+nectar to a hot and thirsty soul. No summer drink have I drunk so
+innocently restorative after a hot and toilsome march on a broiling May
+morning. But the Bhundaree will not squander it so: he takes care not to
+clean his pots, and when he takes them down in the morning the liquor is
+already foaming like London stout. Not that he means to drink it
+himself, for you must know that, by the rules of his caste, he is a
+total abstainer, being a Bhundaree, whose function is to draw toddy, not
+to drink it. This is one of those profound institutes by which the
+wisdom of the ancients fenced the whole social system of this strange
+land.
+
+But, while the Bhundaree must refuse all intoxicating drinks himself, it
+is his duty to exercise a large tolerance towards those who are not so
+hindered. He is, in fact, a partner in the business of Babajee, Licensed
+Vendor of Fresh Toddy, towards whose spacious, open-fronted shop,
+thatched with "jaolees," he now carries his gourds. There the contents
+will stand, in dirty vessels and a warm place, maturing their
+exhilarating qualities until the evening, when the Tam o' Shanters and
+Souter Johnnies of the village begin to assemble and squat in a ring in
+the open space in front. They may be Kolees, or fishermen, and Agrees,
+who make salt, and aboriginal Katkurrees from the jungle, with their
+bows and arrows, most bibulous of all, but among them all there will be
+no Bhundaree. Babajee sits apart, presiding and serving, beside a dirty
+table, on which are many bottles and dirty tumblers of patterns which
+were on our tables thirty years ago. The assembly begins solemnly,
+discussing social problems and bartering village gossip, for the Hindu
+is by nature staid. After a while, at the second bottle perhaps,
+cheerfulness will supervene, then mirth and garrulity, ending, as the
+night closes round, with wordy contention and a general brawl. But
+nothing serious will happen, for toddy, though decidedly heady, is at
+the worst a thin potation. A strong and very pure spirit is distilled
+from it, which has its devotees, but the rustic, as a rule, prefers
+quantity to quality. We are often told that the British Government
+taught the people of India to drink, but the scene that I have tried to
+describe is indigenous conviviality, much older than any European
+connection with the country.
+
+Is it any wonder that the coconut has become an emblem of fertility and
+prosperity and all good luck? When a new house is building you will see
+a high pole over the doorway, bearing coconuts at the top, with an
+umbrella spread over them. Do not ask the owner the meaning of the sign,
+for he does not know. He does not think about such matters, but he feels
+about them and he knows that that is the right thing to do. Besides, he
+might ask you why you nail a horseshoe over your door. The difference
+between us and him is that we do such things in jest, no longer
+believing in them. They are the husks of a dead faith with us. But the
+Hindu's faith is very living still. So, when he breaks a coconut at the
+launching of a pattimar, he is a gainer in hope, if nothing else; while
+we squander our champagne and gain nothing. That nut follows him even to
+the grave, or burning ground, with mystic significances which I cannot
+explain. I have been told that, when a very holy man dies, who always
+clothed himself in ashes and never profaned his hands with work, his
+disciples sometimes break a coconut over his head. If the spirit can
+escape from the body through the sutures of the skull instead of by any
+of the other orifices, it is believed to find a more direct route to
+heaven, so the purpose of this ceremony may be to facilitate its exit
+that way. In that case the breaking of the nut is perhaps only an
+accident, due to its not being so hard as the holy man's skull.
+
+
+
+
+XVI
+
+
+THE BETEL NUT
+
+One half the world does not know how the other half lives. Noticing a
+pot of areca nut toothpaste on a chemist's counter, I asked him what the
+peculiar properties of the areca nut were--in short, what was it good
+for. He replied that it was an astringent and acted beneficially on the
+gums, but he had never heard that it was used for any other purpose than
+the manufacture of an elegant dentifrice. I felt inclined to question
+him about the camel in order to see whether he would tell me that it was
+a tropical animal, chiefly noted for the fine quality of its hair, from
+which artist's brushes were made. Here was a man whose special business
+it is to know the properties and uses of all drugs and their action on
+the human system, and he had not the faintest notion that there are
+nearly 300 millions of His Majesty's subjects, and many millions more
+beyond his empire, who could scarcely think of life as a thing to be
+desired if they were obliged to go through it without the areca nut. For
+the areca nut is the betel nut.
+
+In the Canarese language and the kindred dialects of Malabar it is
+called by a name which is rendered as _adike_, or _adika_, in scientific
+books, but would stand more chance of being correctly pronounced by the
+average Englishman if it were spelled _uddiky_. The coast districts of
+Canara and Malabar being famed for their betel nuts, the trade name of
+the article was taken from the languages current there, and was tortured
+by the Portuguese into _areca_. Over the greater part of India the
+natives use the Hindustanee name _supari_, but by Englishmen it is best
+known as the betel nut, because it is always found in company with the
+betel leaf, with which, however, it has no more connection than
+strawberries have with cream. The one is the leaf of a kind of pepper
+vine, and the other is the seed, or nut, of a palm. But nature and man
+have combined to marry them to one another, and it is difficult to think
+of them separately.
+
+In life the betel vine climbs up the stem of the areca palm, and in
+death the areca nut is rolled in a shroud of the betel leaf and the two
+are munched together. Other things are often added to the morsel, such
+as a clove, a cardamom, or a pinch of tobacco, and a small quantity of
+fresh lime is indispensable.
+
+What is the precise nature of the consolation derived from the chewing
+of this mixture it is not easy to say. Outwardly it produces effects
+which are visible enough, to wit, a most copious flow of saliva, which
+is dyed deep red by the juice of the nut, so that a betel nut chewer
+seems to go about spitting blood all the day. As every Hindu is a betel
+nut chewer, those 943,903 superficial miles of country which make up our
+Indian Empire must be bespattered to a degree which it dizzies the mind
+to contemplate. This is one of the difficulties of Indian
+administration. In large towns and centres of business it is found
+necessary to fortify the public buildings in various ways. The Custom
+House in Bombay has the wall painted with dark red ochre to a height of
+three or four feet from the ground.
+
+But these are the outward results. What is the inwardness of the thing?
+In a word, why do the people chew betel nut? Surely not that they may
+spit on our public buildings. That is a chance result, not sought for
+and not shunned. There is, of course, some deeper reason. Early
+travellers in India were much exercised about this and used to question
+the people, from whom they got some curious explanations. One reports,
+"They say they do it to comfort the heart, nor could live without it."
+Another says, "It bites in the mouth, accords rheume, cooles the head,
+strengthens the teeth and is all their phisicke." A Latin writer gets
+quite eloquent. "_Ex ea mansione_"--by that chewing--he says, "mire
+recreantur, et ad labores tolerandos et ad languores discutiendos."
+
+But the remarkable thing is that the betel nut has these effects only on
+the Hindu constitution. To a European the strong, astringent taste and
+penetrating odour of the betel nut are alike insufferable, and there is
+no instance on record, as far as I know, of an Englishman becoming a
+betel nut chewer. But wherever Hindu blood circulates, not in India
+only, but all through the islands of the Malay Archipelago, as far as
+the Philippines, the betel nut is an indispensable ingredient of any
+life that is worth living. Mohammedanism forbids spirits and Brahminism
+condemns all things that intoxicate or stupefy, but the betel nut is
+like the cup that cheers yet not inebriates. No religion speaks
+disrespectfully of it. It flourishes, blessed by all, and takes its
+place among the institutions of civilisation. Indeed it is the chief
+cement of social intercourse in a country where all ordinary
+conviviality between man and man is almost strangled by the quarantine
+enforced against ceremonial defilement. Friend offers friend the betel
+nut box just as Scotsmen offered the snuff-box in the hearty old days
+that are passing away. And all visits of ceremony, durbars, receptions,
+leave-takings, and public functions of the like kind are brought to an
+august close by the distribution of _pan supari_. To go through this
+rite without visible repugnance is part of the training of our young
+Civil Servants. When the interview or ceremony has lasted as long as it
+was intended to last, there enter, with due pomp, bearers of
+heavy-scented garlands, woven of jasmine and marigold, and in form like
+the muffs and boas that ladies wear in winter. These are put upon the
+necks and wrists of the guests in order of rank. Silver vases and
+sprinklers follow, containing rose-water and attar of roses. You may
+ward off the former from your person by offering your handkerchief for
+it, and you may present the back of your hand for the latter, of which
+one drop will be applied to your skin with a tiny silver or golden
+spoon.
+
+Finally, when everybody is reeking with incongruous odours and trying
+not to be sick, a silver tray appears with the daintiest little packets
+of _pan supari_, each pinned with a clove, and every guest is expected
+to transfer one to his mouth, for they have been prepared by a Brahmin
+and cannot hurt the most delicate caste. To an Englishman, however, it
+is now generally conceded to compromise by keeping the morsel in his
+hand, as if waiting an opportunity to enjoy it more at his leisure. When
+you get home your servant craves it of you and contrasts real rajah's
+_pan supari_ with the stuff which the poor man gets in the bazaar.
+
+The chewing of betel nut requires more apparatus and makes greater
+demands on a man's time and personal care than the smoking of tobacco or
+any of the allied vices. To cut the nut neatly an instrument is used
+like an enormous pair of nutcrackers with a sharp cutting edge. The lime
+should be made from oyster shells and it must be freshly burned and
+slaked. Exposure to the air soon spoils it, so a small, air-tight tin
+box is required to keep it in. Lastly, the betel leaf must be fresh,
+and in a hot climate green leaves do not keep their freshness without
+special care.
+
+But the necessity for attending to all these matters no doubt adds
+greatly to the interest which a chewer of _pan supari_ is able to find
+in life. Moreover, his taste and wealth have scope for expression in the
+elegance of his appointments, and by these you may generally judge of a
+man's rank and means. A well-to-do Mahratta cartman will carry in his
+waistband a sort of bijou hold-all of coloured cloth, which, when
+unrolled, displays neat pockets of different forms for the leaves,
+broken nuts, lime box, spices, etc.; but a native magistrate, who goes
+about attended by a peon and need not carry his own things, will have a
+box of polished brass, or even silver, divided into compartments.
+
+One may easily infer that to meet such a universal want there must be a
+correspondingly great industry, and the cultivation of the betel nut is
+indeed a great industry, and a most beautiful one. Surely since Adam
+first began to till the ground in the sweat of his face, his children
+have found no tillage so Eden-like as this. India has produced no Virgil
+to take the common charms of a farmer's life and put them into immortal
+song, so we search her literature in vain to learn how her simple,
+rustic people feel about these things, and in what we see of their life
+there is little sign that they feel about them at all; but when the
+Englishman, wandering, gun in hand, up a steaming valley among
+forest-clad hills, suddenly finds the path lead him into a betel nut
+garden, with no wire fence, or locked gate, or inhospitable notice
+threatening prosecution to trespassers, he feels as if he had entered
+some region of bliss where the earthly senses are too narrow for the
+delights that press for entrance to the soul.
+
+In the first place, the areca nut palm is almost, if not altogether, the
+most graceful of all its graceful tribe. Unlike the coconut, it grows as
+erect as a flagstaff, and the effect of this is increased by its extreme
+slenderness, for though it may attain a height of fifty feet, its
+diameter scarcely exceeds six inches. At the top of the stem there is a
+sheath of polished green, from the top of which again there issues a
+tuft of the most ethereal, feathery fronds, diverging and drooping with
+matchless grace. Under these hang the clusters of reddish-brown nuts.
+
+As the areca nut will not grow except in places that are at once moist
+and warm, the gardens are generally situated in narrow valleys and dells
+among hills, with little streams of limpid water rippling past them or
+through them. The steaming heat of such situations can only be realised
+by one who has traversed them at noon in the month of May in pursuit of
+sport or natural history. But the palms grow so close together that
+their fronds mingle into an almost unbroken roof, through which the sun
+can scarcely peep, and every air that enters there has the heat charmed
+out of it, and as it wanders among the broad, aromatic leaves of the
+betel vines which wreathe the pillars of that fairy hall, it is
+softened with balmy moisture, and laden with fragrance and scent to woo
+your senses in perfect tune with the tinkling music of the water and the
+enchanting beauty of the whole scene.
+
+In a large hut among these shades, with bananas waving their banner
+leaves over the smooth and well-swept yard in front, where the children
+play, lives the family that cultivates the garden. They are a sect of
+Brahmins, but very unbrahminical, unsophisticated, industrious,
+temperate, kind and hospitable. Other Brahmins despise them and wish to
+deny them the name, because they have soiled their priestly hands with
+agriculture. But they return the contempt, and walk in the way of their
+fathers, a way which leads them among the purest pleasures that this
+life affords and keeps them from many of its more sordid temptations.
+Perhaps the picture has its darker shades too. I have not seen them, and
+why should I look for them?
+
+The betel nut harvest is something of the nature of an acrobatic
+performance, for the crop is not on the ground, but on poles forty or
+fifty feet high. This is the manner in which it is gathered. The farmer,
+attended by his wife, goes out, and slipping a loose loop of rope over
+his feet to keep them together, so that when he gets the trunk of a tree
+between them it may fit like a wedge, he clasps one of the trees with
+his hands and goes up at a surprising rate. He carries with him a long
+rope, and when he reaches the top, he fastens one end of it to the
+tree, and throws the other to his wife, who goes to a distance and draws
+it tight. Then the man breaks off a heavy bunch of ripe nuts, and
+hitching it on the rope lets it go. It shoots down with such velocity
+that it would knock his wife down did she not know how to dodge it
+skilfully and break its force in a bend of the rope.
+
+When all the bunches are on the ground, the man begins to sway his body
+violently till the tender and supple palm is swinging like a pendulum
+and almost striking the trees on either side. Watching his opportunity,
+the man grasps one of these and transfers himself to it with the
+nimbleness of a monkey. In this way he makes an aerial journey round the
+garden and avoids the fatigue of climbing up and down every separate
+tree.
+
+The gathered betel nuts soon find their way to the warehouses of fat
+Bunias at the coast ports, where they are peeled and prepared and sorted
+and piled in great heaps according to quality, and finally shipped in
+_pattimars_ and _cotias_ and coasting steamers, and so disseminated over
+the length and breadth of the land to be the comforters of poor and
+rich.
+
+It only remains to say that the betel nut is not used in the East for
+tooth-powder, though the natives believe that the practice of chewing it
+saves them from toothache. When they use any dentifrice it is generally
+charcoal, and their toothbrush is either the forefinger or a fibrous
+stick chewed at the end till it becomes like a stiff paintbrush. But
+whatever he may use for the purpose, the Hindu cleans his teeth every
+morning, and that most thoroughly, before he will allow food to pass his
+lips, and the whiteness and soundness of his teeth are an object of envy
+to Englishmen.
+
+
+
+
+XVII
+
+
+A HINDU FESTIVAL
+
+Poets may sing,
+
+ "Let the ape and tiger die,"
+
+but they are not quite dead yet, only caged, and where is the man in
+whose bosom there lurks no wish that he could open the door just once in
+a way and let them have a frisk? In the East there is no hypocrisy about
+the matter. The tiger's den is barred and locked, and the British
+Government keeps the key, but the ape has an appointed day in the year
+on which he shall have his outing. They call it the _Holi_, which is a
+misnomer, for of all Hindu festivals this is the most unholy; but of
+that anon.
+
+I asked a Brahmin what this festival commemorated, and he said he did
+not know. He knew how to observe it, which was the main thing. Of
+course, there is an explanation of it in Hindu mythology, which the
+Brahmin ought to have known, and very probably did know, but was ashamed
+to tell. But it matters little, for we may be well assured that the
+explanation was invented to sanctify the festival long after the
+festival itself came into vogue, as has been the case with some of our
+most Christian holidays.
+
+The Holi comes round about the time of the vernal equinox, when victory
+declares for day and warmth in its long struggle with night and cold.
+Then Nature rises and shakes herself as Samson rose and shook himself
+and snapped the seven new cords that bound him, as tow is snapped when
+it smells the fire. Then "the wanton lapwing gets himself another
+crest," and then also the young Hindu's fancy lightly turns to thoughts
+of love; and so it came about quite naturally that, looking around,
+among his plentiful gods, for a deity who might fitly be invited to
+preside over his lusty rejoicings at this season, he pitched upon
+Krishna.
+
+For Krishna, when he was upon this earth, was an amorous youth, and his
+goings on with certain milkmaids were such as would shock Mrs. Grundy at
+the present day even in India, supposing he had been only a man. But he
+was a god, therefore his doing a thing made it right, and, where he
+presides, his worshippers may do as he did. Consequently, man, woman and
+child of every caste and grade give themselves licence, during these
+days of the Holi, to act and speak in a manner that would be scandalous
+at any other time of the year.
+
+Hindus of the better sort are beginning to be outwardly, and some of
+them, I hope, inwardly, rather ashamed of this festival, and it is time
+they were. Yet there is always something cheering in the sight of
+untutored mirth and exuberant animal joy breaking out and triumphing
+over the sadness of life and the monotony of lowly toil; and I confess
+that I find a pleasing side to this festival of the Holi. I like it best
+as I have seen it in a fishing village on the west coast of India.
+
+At first sight you would not suspect the black and brawny Koli of much
+gaiety, but there is deep down in him a spring of mirth and humour
+which, "when wine and free companions kindle him," can break out into
+the most boisterous hilarity and jocundity and even buffoonery, throwing
+aside all trammels of convention and decorum. His women folk, too,
+though they do not go out of their proper place in the social system,
+assert themselves vigorously within it, and are gay and vivacious and
+well aware of their personal attractions. So the Koli village looks
+forward to the Holi and makes timely preparation for it.
+
+The night before the _poornima_, or full moon, of the month Phalgoon
+arrives, each trim fishing boat is stored with flowers and leafy
+branches, all the flags that can be mustered and a drum; then the whole
+village goes a-fishing. Next morning each housewife gets up early to
+decorate her house and trick out herself and her children. For though
+the Koli is the most naked of men, his whole workaday costume consisting
+of one rag about equal in amplitude to half a good pocket-handkerchief,
+his wife is the most dressy of women. She is always well-dressed even
+on common days. The bareness of her limbs may perhaps shock our notions
+of propriety at first, for, being a mud-wader of necessity, like the
+stork and the heron, she girds her garments about her very tightly
+indeed; but this only sets off her wonderfully erect and athletic
+figure, while her well-set head looks all the nicer that it has no
+covering except her own neatly-bound hair. She never draws her _saree_
+coyly over her head, like other native women, when she meets a man. On
+this day there is no change in the fashion of her costume (that never
+changes), but she puts on her brightest dress, blue, or red, or lemon
+yellow, with all her private jewellery, and decks her hair with a small
+chaplet of bright flowers.
+
+Her children are tricked out with more fancy. The little brown girl, who
+yesterday had not one square inch of cloth on the whole of her tiny
+person, comes out a _petite_ miss in a crimson bodice and a white skirt,
+with her shining black hair oiled and combed and plaited and decked with
+flowers, and her neck and arms and feet twinkling with ornaments. Her
+brother of six or seven looks as if he were going to a fancy-dress ball
+in the character of His Highness the Holkar. His small head is set in a
+great three-cornered Maratha turban, and his body, a stranger to the
+feel of clothes, is masked in a resplendent purple jacket. The young men
+of the village, such of them as are not gone a-fishing, have donned
+clean white jackets. Beyond that they will not go, contemning
+effeminacy.
+
+About nine o'clock, when the sun is now well up, the distant sound of a
+tom-tom is heard, and the first of the returning fleet of _muchwas_
+appears at the mouth of the creek. A long line of red and white flags
+extends from the top of the mainyard to the helm and streamers flutter
+from the mastheads. A monster bouquet of marigolds is mounted on the
+bowsprit, branches of trees are stuck about in all possible situations,
+and three or four large fishes hang from the bow, trailing their tails
+in the water. With the exception of the man at the helm, who sits
+stolid, minding his business, and one youth who plays the tom-tom, the
+crew are standing in a ring, gesticulating with their arms and legs, or
+waving wands and branches of trees. Some have half of their faces
+smeared with red paint. If a boat passes they greet it with a shout and
+a sally of wit or ribaldry. The other _muchwas_ follow close behind,
+with every inch of white sail spread and all a-flutter with flags and
+streamers: it would be difficult to imagine a prettier spectacle, and
+the tom-toming and the happiness beaming on the faces of the crews are
+almost infectious. One feels almost compelled to wave one's hat and cry,
+"Hip, hip, hooray!"
+
+The boats come to shore, and then there ought to be a tumbling out of
+the silvery harvest and a gathering of women and a strife indescribable
+of shrill tongues, and then a long procession of wives and daughters
+trotting to market, each balancing a great, dripping basket on her
+comely head, while the husbands and fathers go home to eat and sleep.
+But there is none of that to-day. The silvery harvest may go to
+destruction and the husbands and fathers can do without sleep for once.
+The children are taken on board in all their finery, and friends join
+and musicians with their instruments. Then all sails are spread again
+and the boats start for a circuit round the harbour. The wind blows
+fiercely from the north, and each buoyant _muchwa_ scuds along at a
+fearful pace, heeling over until the rippling water fingers the edge of
+the gunwale as if it were just getting ready to leap over and take
+possession. But the hilarious Koli balances himself on the sloping
+thwarts and jumps and sings and claps his hands, while the pipes screech
+and the drums rattle. Twice, or three times, does the whole fleet go out
+over the bar and wheel and return, each boat racing to be first, with no
+more sense of danger than a porpoise at play.
+
+At last they have had enough. The sails are furled and the boats
+beached, the big fishes are taken down from the bows, and the whole
+crowd, with their trophies and garlands, dance their way to the village.
+There it is better that we leave them. To-night great fires will be
+lighted in the middle of the main road and capacious pots of toddy will
+be at hand, and every merry Koli will get hilariously drunk and do and
+say things which we had better not see and hear. And the children will
+look on and try to imitate their elders. And women will find it best to
+keep out of the way for the sake of their pretty dresses, if there were
+no better reason. For pots of water dyed crimson with _goolal_ powder
+are ready, and everybody has licence to splash everybody when he gets a
+chance. Any time during the next two or three days you may find your own
+servants coming home dappled with red.
+
+So the ape has his fling. And the tiger is lurking not far behind. In
+each of those fires it is the proper thing to roast a cock, throwing him
+in alive. If the fire is a great one, a general village fire, then it is
+still greater fun to throw in a live goat. But the worst of these
+ceremonies are happily going out of fashion. For the English law is
+stern, and the _sahibs_ have strange and quixotic notions about cruelty
+to animals, and although they are far away on tour at this season and no
+native officer would voluntarily interfere with an immemorial custom,
+still the tiger walks in fear in these days and the Koli is often
+content to roast a coconut as proxy for a cock or a goat.
+
+
+
+
+XVIII
+
+
+INDIAN POVERTY
+
+THE STANDARD OF LIVING
+
+When Mr. Keir Hardie was in India he satisfied himself that the standard
+of living among the working classes in India has been deteriorating.
+This is interesting psychologically, and one would like to know by what
+means Mr. Keir Hardie attained to satisfaction on such a great and
+important question. Doubtless he had the ungrudging assistance of Mr.
+Chowdry.
+
+The poverty of India has for a good many years been a handy weapon, like
+the sailor's belaying pin, for everyone who wanted to "have at" our
+administration of that country; and if "a lie which is half a truth is
+ever the blackest of lies," then this one must be as black as Tartarus,
+for it is indubitably more than half a truth. The common field-labourer
+in India is about as poor as man can be. He is very nearly as poor as a
+sparrow. His hut, built by himself, is scarcely more substantial or
+permanent than the sparrow's nest, and his clothing compares very
+unfavourably with the sparrow's feathers. The residue of his worldly
+goods consists of a few cooking pots and, it must be admitted, a few
+ornaments on his wife.
+
+But a sparrow is usually well fed and quite happy. It has no property
+simply because it wants none. If it stored honey like the busy bee, or
+nuts like the thrifty squirrel, it would be a prey to constant anxiety
+and stand in hourly danger of being plundered of its possessions, and
+perhaps killed for the sake of them. Therefore to speak of a Hindu's
+poverty as if it certainly implied want and unhappiness is mere
+misrepresentation born of ignorance. In all ages there have been men so
+enamoured of the possessionless life that they have abandoned their
+worldly goods and formed brotherhoods pledged to lifelong poverty. The
+majority of religious beggars in India belong to brotherhoods of this
+kind, and are the sturdiest and best-fed men to be seen in the country,
+especially in time of famine.
+
+But the Hindu peasant is not a begging friar, and may be supposed to
+have some share of the love of money which is common to humanity; so it
+is worth while to inquire why he is normally so very poor. There are two
+reasons, both of which are so obvious and have so often been pointed out
+by those who have known him best, that there is little excuse for
+overlooking them. The first of them is thus stated in Tennant's _Indian
+Recreations_, written in 1797, before British rule had affected the
+people of India much in one direction or another. "Industry can hardly
+be ranked among their virtues. Among all classes it is necessity of
+subsistence and not choice that urges to labour; a native will not earn
+six rupees a month by working a few hours more, if he can live upon
+three; and if he has three he will not work at all," Such was the Hindu
+a century ago in the eyes of an observant and judicious man, studying
+him with all the sympathetic interest of novelty, and such he is now.
+
+The other reason for the chronic poverty of the Indian peasant is that,
+if he had money beyond his immediate necessity, he could not keep it. It
+is the despair of the Government of India and of every English official
+who endeavours to improve his condition that he cannot keep his land, or
+his cattle, or anything else on which his permanent welfare depends. The
+following extract from _The Reminiscences of an Indian Police Official_
+gives a lively picture of the effect of unaccustomed wealth, not on
+peasants, but on farmers owning land and cattle and used to something
+like comfort.
+
+"Yellapa, like all cotton growers in that part of the Western
+Presidency, profited enormously by the high price of the staple during
+the American war. Silver was poured into the country (literally) in
+_crores_ (millions sterling), and cultivators who previously had as much
+as they could do to live, suddenly found themselves possessed of sums
+their imagination had never dreamt of. What to do with their wealth, how
+to spend their cash was their problem. Having laden their women and
+children with ornaments, and decked them out in expensive _sarees_, they
+launched into the wildest extravagance in the matter of carts and
+trotting bullocks, going even as far as silver-plated yokes and harness
+studded with silver mountings. Even silver tyres to the wheels became
+the fashion. Twelve and fifteen rupees were eagerly paid for a pair of
+trotting bullocks. Trotting matches for large stakes were common; and
+the whole rural population appeared with expensive red silk umbrellas,
+which an enterprising English firm imported as likely to gratify the
+general taste for display. Many took to drink, not country liquors such
+as had satisfied them previously, but British brandy, rum, gin, and even
+champagne."
+
+A few pages further on the author tells us of the ruin by debt and
+drunkenness of the families which had indulged in these extravagances.
+The fact is that to keep for to-morrow what is in the hand to-day
+demands imagination, purpose and self-discipline, which the Hindu
+working man has not. He is the product of centuries, during which his
+rulers made the life of to-morrow too uncertain, while his climate made
+the life of to-day too easy. No outward applications will alone cure his
+poverty, because it is a symptom of an inward disease.
+
+When a healthier state of mind shall awaken an appetite for comforts and
+conveniences, and create necessities unknown to his fathers, then
+degrading poverty will no longer be possible as the common lot. And it
+was to be hoped that the British rule would in time have this happy
+effect. Tennant evidently thought that it had begun to do so even in his
+day. "The existence," he says, "of a regular British Government is but a
+recent circumstance; yet in the course of a few years complete security
+has been afforded to all of its dependants; many new manufactures have
+been established, many more have been extended to answer the demands of
+a larger exportation. We have therefore conferred upon our Asiatic
+subjects an increase of security, of industry and of produce, and of
+consequent greater means of enjoyment."
+
+It is therefore a very grave charge that Mr. Keir Hardie brings against
+the British Administration when he says, a century after these words
+were written, that the standard of living among the Hindu peasantry has
+deteriorated. Happily there does not appear to have been a close
+relation between facts and Mr. Keir Hardie's conclusions during his
+Indian tour, so we may continue to put our confidence in the many
+hopeful indications that exist of a distinct improvement in the ideal of
+life which has so long prevailed among our poor Indian fellow-subjects.
+The rise in the wages of both skilled and unskilled labour during even
+the last thirty years, especially in and near important towns, has been
+most remarkable.
+
+It is more to the point to know what the labourer is able to do and
+actually does with his wages, and here the returns of trade and the
+reports of the railway companies, post office and savings bank have
+striking evidence to offer. They are published annually, and anyone,
+even Mr. Keir Hardie, may consult them who likes his facts in
+statistical form. For those who live in India there are abundant
+evidences with more colour in them. Some thirty years ago, or more,
+there was a steamship company in Bombay owning two small steamers which
+carried passengers across the harbour. By degrees it extended its
+operations and increased its fleet until it had a daily service of fast
+steamers, with accommodation for nearly a thousand third-class
+passengers, which went down the coast as far as Goa, calling at every
+petty port on the way. The head of the firm retired some years ago,
+having made his pile. Seldom has a more profitable enterprise been
+started in Bombay. And whence did the profits come? From the pockets of
+Hindu peasants. The Mahrattas of the Ratnagiri District supply most of
+the "labour" required in Bombay, and for these the company spread its
+nets. And by their incessant coming and going it amassed its wealth.
+
+Heads of mercantile firms and Government offices, and all who have to
+deal with the Mahratta "puttiwala," viewed its success without surprise.
+Though always grumbling at his wages, he never appears to be without the
+means and the will to travel. A marriage, a religious ceremony in his
+family, or the death of some relative, requires his immediate presence
+in his village, and he asks for leave. If he cannot get it otherwise, he
+offers to forfeit his pay for the period. If it is still refused, he
+resigns his situation and goes. This does not indicate pinching poverty;
+there must be some margin between such men and starvation. And a saunter
+through their villages will amply confirm such a surmise.
+
+It is no uncommon thing in these coast villages to see that foreign
+luxury, a chair, perhaps even an easy-chair, in the verandah of a common
+Bhundaree (toddy-drawer). The rapidly growing use of chairs, glass
+tumblers, enamelled ironware, soda-water and lemonade, patent medicines,
+and even cheap watches, declares plainly that the young Hindu of the
+present day does not live as his fathers did. Men go better dressed, and
+their children are clothed at an earlier age. The advertisements in
+vernacular languages that one meets with, circulated and posted up in
+all sorts of places, tell the same tale convincingly; for the advertiser
+knows his business, and will not angle where no fish rise.
+
+Nor are large towns like Bombay the only places where the Hindu peasant
+widens his horizon and acquires new tastes. In the Fiji Islands there
+are about 22,000 natives of India who went out as indentured coolies
+with the option of returning at the end of five years at their own
+expense, or after ten years at that of Government. When these men come
+home, they bring with them new tastes and new ideas, as well as the
+habit of saving money and thousands of rupees saved during their short
+exile. In Mauritius and South Africa the Hindu working man is learning
+the same lessons. When he gets back to the sleepy life of his native
+village, he is not likely to settle down contentedly at the level from
+which he started.
+
+On every hand, in short, forces are at work stirring discontent in the
+breasts of the younger generation with the existence which was the
+heritage of their fathers. These forces operate from the outside, and
+the mass is large and very inert: it would be rash to say that in the
+heart of it there are not still millions who regard a monotonous
+struggle for a bare existence as their portion from Providence. But when
+a man who has travelled in India for half a cold season tells us that
+the standard of living in India has deteriorated, we are tempted to
+quote from Sir Ali Baba: "What is it that these travelling people put on
+paper? Let me put it in the form of a conundrum. Q. What is it that the
+travelling M.P. treasures up and the Anglo-Indian hastens to throw away?
+A. Erroneous hazy, distorted impressions." "One of the most serious
+duties attending a residence in India is the correcting of those
+misapprehensions which your travelling M.P. sacrifices his bath to
+hustle upon paper."
+
+
+
+
+XIX
+
+
+BORROWED INDIAN WORDS
+
+Of the results of the Roman supremacy in Britain none have been so
+permanent as their influence on our language. No doubt this was less due
+to any direct effect that their residence among the Britons had at the
+time on vernacular speech than to the fact that, for many centuries
+after their departure, Latin was the language, throughout Europe, of
+literature and scholarship. Our supremacy in India is acting on the
+languages of that country in both ways, and though it has scarcely
+lasted half as long yet as the Roman rule in Britain, English already
+bids fair to become one day the common tongue of the Hindus. But there
+is also a current flowing the other way, comparatively insignificant,
+but curious and interesting.
+
+Few persons in England are aware how often they use words of Indian
+origin in common speech. In attempting to give a list of these I will
+exclude the trade names of articles of Indian produce or manufacture,
+which have no literary interest, and also words which indicate objects,
+ideas or customs that are not English, and therefore have no English
+equivalents, such as "tom-tom," "sepoy" and "suttee," I will also omit
+Indian words, such as "bundobust," and "griffin," which are used by
+writers like Thackeray in the same way in which French terms are
+commonly introduced into English composition.
+
+Of course, it is not always possible to draw a hard and fast line. There
+are words which first came into England as the trade names of Indian
+products, but have extended their significance, or entirely changed it,
+and taken a permanent place in the English language. Pepper still means
+what it originally meant, but it has also become a verb. Another example
+is Shawl, a word which has lost all trace of its Oriental origin. It is
+a pure Hindustani word, pronounced "Shal," and indicating an article
+thus described in the seventeenth century by Thevenot, as quoted in
+Hobson-Jobson:--"Une Chal, qui est une maniere de toilette d'une laine
+très fine qui se fait a Cachmir." With the article to England came the
+name, but soon spread itself over all fabrics worn in the same fashion,
+except the Scotch plaid, which held its own.
+
+Somewhat similar is Calico, originally a fine cotton cloth imported from
+Calicut. This place is called Calicot by the natives, and may have
+dropped the final T through the influence of French dressmakers. Chintz
+is another example, being the Hindustani word "cheent," which means a
+spotted cotton cloth. In trade fabrics are always described in the
+plural, and the Z in Chintz is no doubt a perversion, through
+misunderstanding, of the terminal S. Lac is another Indian word which
+has retained its own meaning, but it has gone beyond it and given rise
+to a verb "to lacquer."
+
+With these perhaps should be mentioned Pyjamas and Shampoo, both of
+which have undergone strange perversions. Pyjama is an Indian name for
+loose drawers or trousers tied with a cord round the waist, such as
+Mussulmans of both sexes wear. In India the Pyjama was long ago adopted,
+with a loose coat to match, as a more decent and comfortable costume
+than the British nightshirt, and when Anglo-Indians retired they brought
+the fashion home with them, English tailors called the whole costume a
+"Pyjama suit," but the second word was soon dropped and the first
+improved into the plural number.
+
+"Shampoo" comes from a verb "champna," to press or squeeze, and the
+imperative, "champo," as often happens, was the form in which it became
+English. Forbes, in his _Oriental Memoirs_, writes of "the effects of
+opium, champoing and other luxuries indulged in by Oriental
+sensualists." When the medical profession in England began to patronise
+the practice, it assumed a more dignified name, "massage," and the old
+word was relegated to the hairdressers, who appropriated it to the
+washing of the head, an operation with which the word has no proper
+relation at all.
+
+There are two words of doubtful derivation, which may be mentioned in
+this connection. Cot, in the sense of a light bed, or cradle, is not
+much used in England, but is given in Webster's and other dictionaries,
+with the same Saxon derivation, as the "cot beside the hill" which the
+poet Rogers sighed for. If this is correct, then it is at least curious
+that the word should have almost gone out of use in England and revived
+in India from a distinct root. There it is the term in every-day use for
+any rough bedstead, such as the natives sleep on and call a khat. The
+average Englishman cannot aspirate a K, and never pronounces the Indian
+A aright unless it is followed by an R, so khat becomes "cot" by a
+process of which there are many illustrations.
+
+The other doubtful word mentioned above is Teapoy. It is defined in the
+dictionaries as an ornamental table, with a folding top, containing
+caddies for holding tea, but in India, where it is in much more general
+use than it is in England, it signifies simply a light tripod table and
+almost certainly comes from "teenpai" (three-foot), corresponding to
+another common word, "charpai" (four-foot), which means a native
+bedstead. The fact that it is sometimes spelled Tepoy confirms this, but
+the other spelling is commoner, and appears to have led to its getting a
+special meaning connected with tea among furniture sellers.
+
+Cheroot, Bangle, Curry and Kidgeree are examples of words which have
+come to us with the things which they signify, and retain their meaning
+though the thing itself may have undergone some change. Curry as made in
+England is sometimes not recognisable by a new arrival from India, and
+Kidgeree is applied to a preparation of rice and fish, whereas it means
+properly a dish of rice, split peas and butter, or "ghee." Fish may be
+eaten with it, but is not an ingredient of it. Bazaar may be classed
+with these words, and also Polo, which is merely the name for a polo
+ball in the language of one of the Himalayan tribes from whom we learned
+the game. It is said to have been played in England for the first time
+at Aldershot in 1871.
+
+More interest attaches to Gymkhana, for neither the word nor the thing
+which it signifies is Indian, though both originated in India, and the
+derivation of the word is unknown, though it is scarcely fifty years
+old. Several hybrid derivations have been suggested, none of them
+probable, and I lean to the suggestion that the starting-point of the
+word may have been "jumkhana", a term which, though it is not in
+Forbes's _Hindustani Dictionary,_ I have heard a native apply to a large
+cotton carpet, such as native acrobats, or wrestlers, might spread when
+about to give a performance. Our use of the words Arena, Stage, Boards,
+Footlights, etc., shows how easily a carpet might give name to a place
+of meeting for athletic exercises.
+
+There is another class of words which have come into England through
+returned Anglo-Indians and spread by their own merit. One of these is
+Loot. The dictionary says that it means "to plunder," but it holds more
+than that or any equivalent English word. Perhaps it has scarcely risen
+above the level of slang yet, but the phrase "to run amuck" is
+classical, having been used by both Pope and Dryden. The pedantic
+attempt made by some writers to change the common way of writing it
+because the original Malay term is a single word, "amok," comes too late
+in view of Dryden's line,
+
+ "And runs an Indian muck at all he meets."
+
+Cheese, in the sense of a thing, or rather of "the very thing," must be
+ranked as slang too, though very common. The slang dictionaries give
+fanciful derivations from Anglo-Saxon roots, or suggest that it is a
+perversion of "chose"; but it is a common Hindustani word for a thing,
+and when an Englishman in India finds some article which exactly suits
+his purpose and exclaims, "Ah! that's the cheese," no one needs to ask
+the derivation. If it did not come to us directly from India, then it
+came through the gipsies, for it is one of the many Hindustani words
+which occur in their language. Another word that came from India
+indirectly is Caste, but it is of Portuguese origin. The early
+Portuguese writers applied it ("casta") to the hereditary division of
+Hindu society, and the English adopted it. It has now become
+indispensable. We have no other word that could take its place in the
+lines,
+
+ Her manners had not that repose
+ Which stamps the caste of Vere de Vere.
+
+I must close with two familiar words which have been so long with us
+that few who use them ever suspect that they came from the East--namely,
+Punch and Toddy. The Rev. J. Ovington, who sailed to Bombay in 1689, in
+the ship that carried the glad news of the coronation of William and
+Mary, tells us that, in the East India Company's chief factory at Surat,
+the common table was supplied with "plenty of generous Sherash (Shiraz)
+wine and arak Punch," Arrack (properly "Urk"), sometimes abbreviated to
+Rack, means any distilled spirit, or essence, but is commonly used to
+distinguish country liquor from imported spirits. The Company's factors
+drank it because European wines and beer were at that time very
+expensive in India, and to reconcile it to their palates they made it
+into a brew called Punch, from the Indian word "panch," meaning five,
+because it contained five ingredients--viz. arrack, hot water, limes,
+sugar and spice. This was the ordinary drink of poor Englishmen in India
+for a longtime, and public "Punch-houses" existed in every settlement of
+the East India Company.
+
+Now, one of the principal substances from which country liquor is
+distilled is palm juice, the native name for which, "tadee," has been
+perverted into "toddy" (as in the case of "cot" above-mentioned), and
+"toddy punch" meant the same thing as "arrack punch," Returning
+Anglo-Indians brought the receipt for making this brew to England, and
+lovers of Vanity Fair will remember how the whole course of that story
+was changed by the bowl of "rack punch" which Joseph Sedley ordered at
+Vauxhall, where "everybody had rack punch." How soon both the brew and
+its Indian name took firm root and spread among us appears from the fact
+that, at the Holy Fair described by Burns in the century before last,
+the lads and lasses sit round a table and "steer about the toddy."
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Concerning Animals and Other Matters
+by E.H. Aitken, (AKA Edward Hamilton)
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+<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.01 Transitional//EN">
+<html>
+<head>
+<meta http-equiv="Content-Type"
+ content="text/html; charset=iso-8859-1">
+<title>The Project Gutenberg eBook of
+ Concerning animals and Other Matters,
+ by E.H. Aitken ("Eha").
+</title>
+<style type="text/css">
+ <!--
+ * { font-family: Times;}
+ P { text-indent: 1em;
+ margin-top: .75em;
+ font-size: 12pt;
+ text-align: justify;
+ margin-bottom: .75em; }
+ P.cont { margin-top: .75em;
+ font-size: 12pt;
+ text-align: justify;
+ margin-bottom: .75em; }
+ H1,H2,H3,H4,H5,H6 { text-align: center; }
+ HR { width: 33%; }
+ PRE { font-family: Courier, monospaced; }
+ .poem {margin-left:10%; margin-right:10%;
+ text-align: left;}
+ .poem .stanza {margin: 1em 0em 1em 0em;}
+ .poem p {margin: 0; padding-left: 3em; text-indent: -3em;}
+ .poem p.i2 {margin-left: 2em;}
+ .poem p.i4 {margin-left: 4em;}
+ .poem .caesura {vertical-align: -200%;}
+ .poem .author {text-align: right;}
+ // -->
+</style>
+</head>
+<body>
+
+
+<pre>
+
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Concerning Animals and Other Matters
+by E.H. Aitken, (AKA Edward Hamilton)
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Concerning Animals and Other Matters
+
+Author: E.H. Aitken, (AKA Edward Hamilton)
+
+Release Date: February 6, 2004 [EBook #10962]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONCERNING ANIMALS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Garrett Alley and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="image-1"><!-- Image 1 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/002.png" width="600" height="817"
+alt="Portrait of 'Eha.'">
+</center>
+
+<h1>CONCERNING ANIMALS AND OTHER MATTERS</h1>
+<center>
+<b>BY E.H. AITKEN ("EHA") </b>
+</center>
+<center>
+AUTHOR OF "FIVE WINDOWS OF THE SOUL," "TRIBES ON MY FRONTIER," ETC.
+</center>
+<center>
+WITH A MEMOIR OF THE AUTHOR BY
+</center>
+<center>
+SURGEON-GENERAL W.B. BANNERMAN I.M.S., C.S.I.
+</center>
+<center>
+WITH ILLUSTRATIONS BY J A. SHEPHERD AND A PORTRAIT
+</center>
+<center>
+LONDON
+</center>
+<center>
+JOHN MURRAY, ALBEMARLE STREET, W.
+</center>
+<center>
+1914
+</center>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<a name="TOC"><!-- TOC --></a>
+<h2>
+ CONTENTS
+</h2>
+
+<pre>
+ <a href="#ILL">LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS</a>
+ <a href="#INT">INTRODUCTION</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_2">I FEET AND HANDS</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_3">II BILLS OF BIRDS</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_4">III TAILS</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_5">IV NOSES</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_51">V EARS</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_6">VI TOMMY</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_7">VII THE BARN OWL</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_8">VIII DOMESTIC ANIMALS</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_9">IX SNAKES</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_101">X THE INDIAN SNAKE-CHARMER</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_10">XI CURES FOR SNAKE-BITE</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_11">XII THE COBRA BUNGALOW</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_12">XIII THE PANTHER I DID NOT SHOOT</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_13">XIV THE PURBHOO</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_14">XV THE COCONUT TREE</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_15">XVI THE BETEL NUT</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_16">XVII A HINDU FESTIVAL</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_17">XVIII INDIAN POVERTY</a>
+ <a href="#RULE4_18">XIX BORROWED INDIAN WORDS</a>
+</pre>
+<p>
+Special thanks are due to the Editors and Proprietors of the <i>Strand
+Magazine, Pall Mall Magazine</i> and <i>Times of India</i> for their courtesy in
+permitting the reprinting of the articles in this book which originally
+appeared in their columns.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<a name="ILL"><!-- ILL --></a>
+<h2>
+ LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS
+</h2>
+
+<H3>
+HALF-TONES
+</H3>
+<p>1. <a href="#image-1">
+Portrait of 'Eha.'
+</a></p>
+<p>2. <a href="#image-4">
+The Nose of the Elephant Becoming a Hand Has Redeemed Its Mind
+</a></p>
+<p>3. <a href="#image-6">
+Good for any Rough Job
+</a></p>
+<p>4. <a href="#image-9">
+Here the Competition Has Been Very Keen indeed.
+</a></p>
+<p>5. <a href="#image-12">
+A Blackbird and a Starling&mdash;the one Lifts Its Skirts, While the Other Wears a Walking Dress.
+</a></p>
+<p>6. <a href="#image-15">
+The Nostrils of the Apteryx Are at the Tip of Its Beak.
+</a></p>
+<p>7. <a href="#image-18">
+The Long-Nosed Monkey.
+</a></p>
+
+
+
+<H3>
+LINE BLOCKS
+</H3>
+<p>8. <a href="#image-2">
+An Authentic Standard Foot.
+</a></p>
+<p>9. <a href="#image-3">
+These Beasts Are All Clodhoppers, and their Feet Are Hobnailed Boots.
+</a></p>
+<p>10. <a href="#image-5">
+It Has to Double them Under and Hobble About Like a Chinese Lady.
+</a></p>
+<p>11. <a href="#image-7">
+No Doubt Each Bird Swears by Its Own Pattern.
+</a></p>
+<p>12. <a href="#image-8">
+Its Bill Deserves Study
+</a></p>
+<p>13. <a href="#image-10">
+As Wonderful As the Pelican, But How Opposite!
+</a></p>
+<p>14. <a href="#image-11">
+There Are Some Eccentrics, Such As Jenny Wren, Which Have Despised their Tails.
+</a></p>
+<p>15. <a href="#image-13">
+At the Sight of a Rival the Dog Holds Its Tail up Stiffly
+</a></p>
+<p>16. <a href="#image-14">
+A Shrew Can Do It, But Not a Man.
+</a></p>
+<p>17. <a href="#image-16">
+A Bold attempt to Grow in the Case of a Tapir
+</a></p>
+<p>18. <a href="#image-17">
+I Have Seen Human Noses of a Pattern Not Unlike This, But they Are Not Considered Aristocratic.
+</a></p>
+<p>19. <a href="#image-19">
+Who Can Consider That Nose Seriously?
+</a></p>
+<p>20. <a href="#image-20">
+Or Perhaps when It Wants to Listen It Raises a Flipper to Its Ear.
+</a></p>
+<p>21. <a href="#image-21">
+'Tear out the House Like the Dogs Wuz atter Him.'
+</a></p>
+<p>22. <a href="#image-22">
+A Great Catholic Congress of Distinguished Ears.
+</a></p>
+<p>23. <a href="#image-23">
+The Curls of a Mother's Darling.
+</a></p>
+
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<a name="INT"><!-- INT --></a>
+<h2>
+ INTRODUCTION
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+"EHA"
+</center>
+<p>
+Edward Hamilton Aitken, the author of the following sketches, was well
+known to the present generation of Anglo-Indians, by his pen-name of
+Eha, as an accurate and amusing writer on natural history subjects.
+Those who were privileged to know him intimately, as the writer of this
+sketch did, knew him as a Christian gentleman of singular simplicity and
+modesty and great charm of manner. He was always ready to help a
+fellow-worker in science or philanthropy if it were possible for him to
+do so. Thus, indeed, began the friendship between us. For when plague
+first invaded India in 1896, the writer was one of those sent to Bombay
+to work at the problem of its causation from the scientific side,
+thereby becoming interested in the life history of rats, which were
+shown to be intimately connected with the spread of this dire disease.
+Having for years admired Eha's books on natural history&mdash;<i>The Tribes on
+my Frontier, An Indian Naturalist's Foreign Policy</i>, and <i>The
+Naturalist on the Prowl</i>, I ventured to write to him on the subject of
+rats and their habits, and asked him whether he could not throw some
+light on the problem of plague and its spread, from the naturalist's
+point of view.
+</p>
+<p>
+In response to this appeal he wrote a most informing and characteristic
+article for <i>The Times of India</i> (July 19, 1899), which threw a flood of
+light on the subject of the habits and characteristics of the Indian rat
+as found in town and country. He was the first to show that <i>Mus
+rattus</i>, the old English black rat, which is the common house rat of
+India outside the large seaports, has become, through centuries of
+contact with the Indian people, a domestic animal like the cat in
+Britain. When one realises the fact that this same rat is responsible
+for the spread of plague in India, and that every house is full of them,
+the value of this naturalist's observation is plain. Thus began an
+intimacy which lasted till Eha's death in 1909.
+</p>
+<p>
+The first time I met Mr. Aitken was at a meeting of the Free Church of
+Scotland Literary Society in 1899, when he read a paper on the early
+experiences, of the English in Bombay. The minute he entered the room I
+recognised him from the caricatures of himself in the <i>Tribes</i>. The
+long, thin, erect, bearded man was unmistakable, with a typically Scots
+face lit up with the humorous twinkle one came to know so well. Many a
+time in after-years has that look been seen as he discoursed, as only he
+could, on the ways of man and beast, bird or insect, as one tramped
+with him through the jungles on the hills around Bombay during week-ends
+spent with him at Vehar or elsewhere. He was an ideal companion on such
+occasions, always at his best when acting the part of <i>The Naturalist on
+the Prowl.</i>
+</p>
+<p>
+Mr. Aitken was born at Satara in the Bombay Presidency on August 16,
+1851. His father was the Rev. James Aitken, missionary of the Free
+Church of Scotland. His mother was a sister of the Rev. Daniel Edward,
+missionary to the Jews at Breslau for some fifty years. He was educated
+by his father in India, and one can well realise the sort of education
+he got from such parents from the many allusions to the Bible and its
+old Testament characters that one constantly finds used with such effect
+in his books. His farther education was obtained at Bombay and Poona. He
+passed M.A. and B.A. of Bombay University first on the list, and won the
+Homejee Cursetjee prize with a poem in 1880. From 1870 to 1876 he was
+Latin Reader in the Deccan College at Poona, which accounts for the
+extensive acquaintance with the Latin classics so charmingly manifest in
+his writings. That he was well grounded in Greek is also certain, for
+the writer, while living in a chummery with him in Bombay in 1902, saw
+him constantly reading the Greek Testament in the mornings without the
+aid of a dictionary.
+</p>
+<p>
+He entered the Customs and Salt Department of the Government of Bombay
+in April 1876, and served in Kharaghoda (the Dustypore of the <i>Tribes</i>),
+Uran, North Kanara and Goa Frontier, Ratnagiri, and Bombay itself. In
+May, 1903, he was appointed Chief Collector of Customs and Salt Revenue
+at Karachi, and in November, 1905, was made Superintendent in charge of
+the District Gazetteer of Sind. He retired from the service in August
+1906.
+</p>
+<p>
+He married in 1883 the daughter of the Rev. J. Chalmers Blake, and left
+a family of two sons and three daughters.
+</p>
+<p>
+In 1902 he was deputed, on special duty, to investigate the prevalence
+of malaria at the Customs stations along the frontier of Goa, and to
+devise means for removing the Salt Peons at these posts, from the
+neighbourhood of the anopheles mosquito, by that time recognised as the
+cause of the deadly malaria, which made service on that frontier dreaded
+by all.
+</p>
+<p>
+It was during this expedition that he discovered a new species of
+anopheline mosquito, which after identification by Major James, I.M.S.,
+was named after him <i>Anopheles aitkeni</i>. During his long service there
+are to be found in the Annual Reports of the Customs Department frequent
+mention of Mr. Aitken's good work, but it is doubtful whether the
+Government ever fully realised what an able literary man they had in
+their service, wasting his talent in the Salt Department. On two
+occasions only did congenial work come to him in the course of his
+public duty&mdash;namely, when he was sent to study, from the naturalist's
+point of view, the malarial conditions prevailing on the frontier of
+Goa; and when during the last two years of his service he was put in
+literary charge of <i>The Sind Gazetteer</i>. In this book one can see the
+light and graceful literary touch of Eha frequently cropping up amidst
+the dry bones of public health and commercial statistics, and the book
+is enlivened by innumerable witty and philosophic touches appearing in
+the most unlikely places, such as he alone could enliven a dull subject
+with. Would that all Government gazetteers were similarly adorned! But
+there are not many "Ehas" in Government employ in India.
+</p>
+<p>
+On completion of this work he retired to Edinburgh, where most of the
+sketches contained in this volume were written. He was very happy with
+his family in his home at Morningside, and was beginning to surround
+himself with pets and flowers, as was his wont all his life, and to get
+a good connection with the home newspapers and magazines, when, alas!
+death stepped in, and he died after a short illness on April 25, 1909.
+</p>
+<p>
+He was interested in the home birds and beasts as he had been with those
+in India, and the last time the writer met him he was taking home some
+gold-fish for his aquarium. A few days before his death he had found his
+way down to the Morningside cemetery, where he had been enjoying the
+sunshine and flowers of Spring, and he remarked to his wife that he
+would often go there in future to watch the birds building their nests.
+</p>
+<p>
+Before that time came, he was himself laid to rest in that very spot in
+sure and certain hope of a blessed resurrection.
+</p>
+<p>
+The above imperfect sketch fails to give the charm and magnetic
+attraction of the man, and for this one must go to his works, which for
+those who knew him are very illuminating in this respect. In them one
+catches a glimpse of his plan for keeping young and cheerful in "the
+land of regrets," for one of his charms was his youthfulness and
+interest in life. He refused to be depressed by his lonely life. "I am
+only an exile," he remarks, "endeavouring to work a successful existence
+in Dustypore, and not to let my environment shape me as a pudding takes
+the shape of its mould, but to make it tributary to my own happiness."
+He therefore urges his readers to cultivate a hobby.
+</p>
+<p>
+"It is strange," he says, "that Europeans in India know so little, see
+so little, care so little, about all the intense life that surrounds
+them. The boy who was the most ardent of bug-hunters, or the most
+enthusiastic of bird-nesters in England, where one shilling will buy
+nearly all that is known, or can be known, about birds or butterflies,
+maintains in this country, aided by Messrs. B. &amp;. S., an unequal strife
+with the insupportableness of an <i>ennui</i>-smitten life. Why, if he would
+stir up for one day the embers of the old flame, he could not quench it
+again with such a prairie of fuel around him. I am not speaking of
+Bombay people, with their clubs and gymkhanas and other devices for
+oiling the wheels of existence, but of the dreary up-country exile,
+whose life is a blank, a moral Sahara, a catechism of the Nihilist
+creed. What such a one needs is a hobby. Every hobby is good&mdash;a sign of
+good and an influence for good. Any hobby will draw out the mind, but
+the one I plead for touches the soul too, keeps the milk of human
+kindness from souring, puts a gentle poetry into the prosiest life. That
+all my own finer feelings have not long since withered in this land of
+separation from 'old familiar faces,' I attribute partly to a pair of
+rabbits. All rabbits are idiotic things, but these come in and sit up
+meekly and beg a crust of bread, and even a perennial fare of village
+<i>moorgee</i> cannot induce me to issue the order for their execution and
+conversion into pie. But if such considerations cannot lead, the
+struggle for existence should drive a man in this country to learn the
+ways of his border tribes. For no one, I take it, who reflects for an
+instant will deny that a small mosquito, with black rings upon a white
+ground, or a sparrow that has finally made up its mind to rear a family
+in your ceiling, exercises an influence on your personal happiness far
+beyond the Czar of the Russias. It is not a question of scientific
+frontiers&mdash;the enemy invades us on all, sides. We are plundered,
+insulted, phlebotomised under our own vine and fig-tree. We might make
+head against the foe if we laid to heart the lesson our national history
+in India teaches&mdash;namely, that the way to fight uncivilised enemies is
+to encourage them to cut one another's throats, and then step in and
+inherit the spoil. But we murder our friends, exterminate our allies,
+and then groan under the oppression of the enemy. I might illustrate
+this by the case of the meek and long-suffering musk-rat, by spiders or
+ants, but these must wait another day."
+</p>
+<p>
+Again he says, "The 'poor dumb animals' can give each other a bit of
+their minds like their betters, and to me their fierce and tender little
+passions, their loves and hates, their envies and jealousies, and their
+small vanities beget a sense of fellow-feeling which makes their
+presence society. The touch of Nature which makes the whole world kin is
+infirmity. A man without a weakness is insupportable company, and so is
+a man who does not feel the heat. There is a large grey ring-dove that
+sits in the blazing sun all through the hottest hours of the day, and
+says coo-coo, coo, coo-coo, coo until the melancholy sweet monotony of
+that sound is as thoroughly mixed up in my brain with 110&deg; in the shade
+as physic in my infantile memories with the peppermint lozenges which
+used to 'put away the taste,' But as for these creatures, which confess
+the heat and come into the house and gasp, I feel drawn to them. I
+should like to offer them cooling drinks. Not that all my midday guests
+are equally welcome: I could dispense, for instance, with the
+grey-ringed bee which has just reconnoitred my ear for the third time,
+and guesses it is a key-hole&mdash;she is away just now, but only, I fancy,
+for clay to stop it up with. There are others also to which I would give
+their <i>cong&eacute;</i> if they would take it. But good, bad, or indifferent they
+give us their company whether we want it or not."
+</p>
+<p>
+Eha certainly found company in beasts all his life, and kept the charm
+of youth about him in consequence to the end. If his lot were cast, as
+it often was, in lonely places, he kept pets, and made friends besides
+of many of the members of the tribes on his frontier; if in Bombay city
+he consoled himself with his aquarium and the museum of the Bombay
+Natural History Society. When the present writer chummed with him in a
+flat on the Apollo Bunder in Bombay, he remembers well that aquarium and
+the Sunday-morning expeditions to the malarious ravines at the back of
+Malabar Hill to search for mosquito larvae to feed its inmates. For at
+that time Mr. Aitken was investigating the capabilities for the
+destruction of larvae, of a small surface-feeding fish with an
+ivory-white spot on the top of its head, which he had found at Vehar in
+the stream below the bund. It took him some time to identify these
+particular fishes (<i>Haplochilus lineatus</i>), and in the meantime he
+dubbed them "Scooties" from the lightning rapidity of their movements,
+and in his own admirable manner made himself a sharer of their joys and
+sorrows, their cares and interests. With these he stocked the ornamental
+fountains of Bombay to keep them from becoming breeding-grounds for
+mosquitoes, and they are now largely used throughout India for this very
+purpose. It will be recognised, therefore, that Mr. Aitken studied
+natural history not only for its own sake, but as a means of benefiting
+the people of India, whom he had learned to love, as is so plainly shown
+in <i>Behind the Bungalow</i>.
+</p>
+<p>
+He was an indefatigable worker in the museum of the Bombay Natural
+History Society, which he helped to found, and many of his papers and
+notes are preserved for us in the pages of its excellent <i>Journal</i>, of
+which he was an original joint-editor. He was for long secretary of the
+Insect Section, and then president. Before his retirement he was elected
+one of the Vice-Presidents of the Society.
+</p>
+<p>
+Mr. Aitken was a deeply religious man, and was for some twenty years an
+elder in the congregation of the United Free Church of Scotland in
+Bombay. He was for some years Superintendent of the Sunday School in
+connection with this congregation, and a member of the Committee of the
+Bombay Scottish Orphanage and the Scottish High Schools. His former
+minister says of him, "He was deeply interested in theology, and
+remained wonderfully orthodox in spite of" (or, as the present writer
+would prefer to say, <i>because of</i>) "his scientific knowledge. He always
+thought that the evidence for the doctrine of evolution had been pressed
+for more than it was worth, and he had many criticisms to make upon the
+Higher Critics of the Bible. Many a discussion we had, in which, against
+me, he took the conservative side."
+</p>
+<p>
+He lets one see very clearly into the workings of his mind in this
+direction in what is perhaps the finest, although the least well known
+of his books, <i>The Five Windows of the Soul</i> (John Murray), in which he
+discourses in his own inimitable way of the five senses, and how they
+bring man and beast into contact with their surroundings. It is a book
+on perceiving, and shows how according as this faculty is exercised it
+makes each man such as he is. The following extract from the book shows
+Mr. Aitken's style, and may perhaps induce some to go to the book itself
+for more from the same source. He is speaking of the moral sense. "And
+it is almost a truism to say that, if a man has any taste, it will show
+itself in his dress and in his dwelling. No doubt, through indolence and
+slovenly habits, a man may allow his surroundings to fall far below what
+he is capable of approving; but every one who does so pays the penalty
+in the gradual deterioration of his perceptions.
+</p>
+<p>
+"How many times more true is all this in the case of the moral sense?
+When the heart is still young and tender, how spontaneously and sweetly
+and urgently does every vision of goodness and nobleness in the conduct
+of another awaken the impulse to go and do likewise! And if that impulse
+is not obeyed, how certainly does the first approving perception of the
+beauty of goodness become duller, until at last we may even come to hate
+it where we find it, for its discordance with the 'motions of sins in
+our members'!
+</p>
+<p>
+"But not less certainly will every earnest effort to bring the life into
+unison with what we perceive to be right bring its own reward in a
+clearer and more joyful perception of what is right, and a keener
+sensitiveness to every discord in ourselves. How all such discord may be
+removed, how the chords of the heart may be tuned and the life become
+music,&mdash;these are questions of religion, which are quite beyond our
+scope. But I take it that every religion which has prevailed among the
+children of Adam is in itself an evidence that, however debased and
+perverted the moral sense may have become, the painful consciousness
+that his heart is 'like sweet bells jangled' still presses everywhere
+and always on the spirit of man; and it is also a conscious or
+unconscious admission that there is no blessedness for him until his
+life shall march in step with the music of the 'Eternal Righteousness.'"
+</p>
+<p>
+Mr. Aitken's name will be kept green among Anglo-Indians by the
+well-known series of books published by Messrs. Thacker &amp; Co., of London
+and Calcutta. They are <i>The Tribes on my Frontier, An Indian
+Naturalist's Foreign Policy</i>, which was published in 1883, and of which
+a seventh edition appeared in 1910. This book deals with the common
+birds, beasts, and insects in and around an Indian bungalow, and it
+should be put into the hands of every one whose lot is cast in India. It
+will open their eyes to the beauty and interests of their surroundings
+in a truly wonderful way, and may be read again and again with
+increasing pleasure as one's experience of Indian life increases.
+</p>
+<p>
+This was followed in 1889 by <i>Behind the Bungalow</i>, which describes with
+charming insight the strange manners and customs of our Indian domestic
+servants. The witty and yet kindly way in which their excellencies and
+defects are touched off is delightful, and many a harassed <i>mem-sahib</i>
+must bless Eha for showing her the humorous and human side of her life
+surrounded as it is by those necessary but annoying inhabitants of the
+Godowns behind the bungalow. A tenth edition of this book was published
+in 1911.
+</p>
+<p>
+<i>The Naturalist on the Prowl</i> was brought out in 1894, and a third
+edition was published in 1905. It contains sketches on the same lines as
+those in <i>The Tribes</i>, but deals more with the jungles, and not so much
+with the immediate surroundings of the bungalow. The very smell of the
+country is in these chapters, and will vividly recall memories to those
+who know the country along the West Coast of India southward of Bombay.
+</p>
+<p>
+In 1900 was published <i>The Common Birds of Bombay</i>, which contains
+descriptions of the ordinary birds one sees about the bungalow or in the
+country. As is well said by the writer of the obituary notice in the
+<i>Journal</i> of the Bombay Natural History Society, Eha "had a special
+genius for seizing the striking and characteristic points in the
+appearance and behaviour of individual species and a happy knack of
+translating them into print so as to render his descriptions
+unmistakable. He looked upon all creatures in the proper way, as if each
+had a soul and character of its own. He loved them all, and was
+unwilling to hurt any of them." These characteristics are well shown in
+this book, for one is able to recognise the birds easily from some
+prominent feature described therein.[<a href="#note-1">1</a>]
+</p>
+<p>
+<i>The Five Windows of the Soul</i>, published by John Murray in 1898, is of
+quite another character from the above, and was regarded by its author
+with great affection as the best of his books. It is certainly a
+wonderfully self-revealing book, and full of the most beautiful
+thoughts. A second impression appeared in the following year, and a new
+and cheaper edition has just been published. The portrait of Eha is
+reproduced from one taken in 1902 in a flat on the Apollo Bunder, and
+shows the man as he was in workaday life in Bombay. The humorous and
+kindly look is, I think, well brought out, and will stir pleasant
+memories in all who knew Mr. Aitken.
+</p>
+<center>
+W. B. B.
+</center>
+<p>
+MADRAS, <i>January</i> 1914.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_1"><!-- RULE4 1 --></a>
+<h2>
+ FOOTNOTES:
+</h2>
+
+<p>
+<a name="note-1"></a>[Footnote 1: The illustrations are his own work, but the blocks having
+been produced in India, they do not do justice to the extreme delicacy
+of workmanship and fine perception of detail which characterise the
+originals, as all who have been privileged to see these will agree.]
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_2"><!-- RULE4 2 --></a>
+<h2>
+ CONCERNING ANIMALS
+</h2>
+
+<h3>
+ I
+</h3>
+<center>
+FEET AND HANDS
+</center>
+<p>
+It is evident that, in what is called the evolution of animal forms, the
+foot came in suddenly when the backboned creatures began to live on the
+dry land&mdash;that is, with the frogs. How it came in is a question which
+still puzzles the phylogenists, who cannot find a sure pedigree for the
+frog. There it is, anyhow, and the remarkable point about it is that the
+foot of a frog is not a rudimentary thing, but an authentic standard
+foot, like the yard measure kept in the Tower of London, of which all
+other feet are copies or adaptations. This instrument, as part of the
+original outfit given to the pioneers of the brainy, backboned, and
+four-limbed races, when they were sent out to multiply and replenish the
+earth, is surely worth considering well. It consists essentially of a
+sole, or palm, made up of small bones and of <i>five</i> separate digits,
+each with several joints.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-2"><!-- Image 2 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/027.png" width="450" height="525"
+alt="An Authentic Standard Foot.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+In the hind foot of a frog the toes are very long and webbed from point
+to point. In this it differs a good deal from the toad, and there is
+significance in the difference. The "heavy-gaited toad," satisfied with
+sour ants, hard beetles, and such other fare as it can easily pick up,
+and grown nasty in consequence, so that nothing seeks to eat it, has
+hobbled through life, like a plethoric old gentleman, until the present
+day, on its original feet. The more versatile and nimble-witted frog,
+seeking better diet and greater security of life, went back to the
+element in which it was bred, and, swimming much, became better fitted
+for swimming. The soft elastic skin between the fingers or toes is just
+the sort of tissue which responds most readily to inward impulses, and
+we find that the very same change has come about in those birds and
+beasts which live much in water. I know that this is not the accepted
+theory of evolution, but I am waiting till it shall become so. We all
+develop in the direction of our tendencies, and shall, I doubt not, be
+wise enough some day to give animals leave to do the same.
+</p>
+<p>
+It seems strange that any creature, furnished with such tricky and
+adaptable instruments to go about the world with, should tire of them
+and wish to get rid of them, but so it happened at a very early stage.
+It must have been a consequence, I think, of growing too fast. Mark
+Twain remarked about a dachshund that it seemed to want another pair of
+legs in the middle to prevent it sagging. Now, some lizards are so long
+that they cannot keep from sagging, and their progress becomes a painful
+wriggle. But if you must go by wriggling, then what is the use of legs
+to knock against stems and stones? So some lizards have discarded two of
+their legs and some all four. Zoologically they are not snakes, but
+snakes are only a further advance in the same direction. That snakes did
+not start fair without legs is clear, for the python has to this day two
+tell-tale leg-bones buried in its flesh.
+</p>
+<p>
+When we pass from reptiles to birds, lo! an astounding thing has
+happened. That there were flying reptiles in the fossil ages we know,
+and there are flying beasts in our own. But the wings of these are
+simple mechanical alterations, which the imagination of a child, or a
+savage, could explain.
+</p>
+<p>
+The hands of a bat are hands still, and, though the fingers are hampered
+by their awkward gloves, the thumbs are free. The giant fruit bats of
+the tropics clamber about the trees quite acrobatically with their
+thumbs and feet.
+</p>
+<p>
+That Apollyonic monster of the prime, the pterodactyl, did even better.
+Stretching on each little finger a lateen sail that would have served to
+waft a skiff across the Thames, it kept the rest of its hands for other
+uses. But what bearing has all this on the case of birds? Here is a
+whole sub-kingdom, as they call it, of the animal world which has
+unreservedly and irrevocably bartered one pair of its limbs for a
+flying-machine. The apparatus is made of feathers&mdash;a new invention,
+unknown to amphibian or saurian, whence obtained nobody can say&mdash;and
+these are grafted into the transformed frame of the old limbs. The
+bargain was worth making, for the winged bird at once soared away in all
+senses from the creeping things of earth, and became a more ethereal
+being; "like a blown flame, it rests upon the air, subdues it, surpasses
+it, outraces it; it is the air, conscious of itself, conquering itself,
+ruling itself." But the price was heavy. The bird must get through life
+with one pair of feet and its mouth. But this was all the bodily
+furniture of Charles Fran&ccedil;ois Felu, who, without arms, became a famous
+artist.
+</p>
+<p>
+A friend of mine, standing behind him in a <i>salon</i> and watching him at
+work, saw him lay down his brush and, raising his foot to his head, take
+off his hat and scratch his crown with his great toe. My friend was
+nearly hypnotised by the sight, yet it scarcely strikes us as a wonder
+when a parrot, standing on one foot, takes its meals with the other. It
+is a wonder, and stamps the parrot as a bird of talent. A mine of hidden
+possibilities is in us all, but those who dig resolutely into it and
+bring out treasure are few.
+</p>
+<p>
+And let us note that the art of standing began with birds. Frogs sit,
+and, as far as I know, every reptile, be it lizard, crocodile,
+alligator, or tortoise, lays its body on the ground when not actually
+carrying it. And these have each four fat legs. Contrast the flamingo,
+which, having only two, and those like willow wands, tucks up one of
+them and sleeps poised high on the other, like a tulip on its stem.
+</p>
+<p>
+Note also that one toe has been altogether discarded by birds as
+superfluous. The germ, or bud, must be there, for the Dorking fowl has
+produced a fifth toe under some influence of the poultry-yard, but no
+natural bird has more than four. Except in swifts, which never perch,
+but cling to rocks and walls, one is turned backwards, and, by a cunning
+contrivance, the act of bending the leg draws them all automatically
+together. So a hen closes its toes at every step it takes, as if it
+grasped something, and, of course, when it settles down on its roost,
+they grasp that tight and hold it fast till morning. But to birds that
+do not perch this mechanism is only an encumbrance, so many of them,
+like the plovers, abolish the hind toe entirely, and the prince of all
+two-legged runners, the ostrich, has got rid of one of the front toes
+also, retaining only two.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-3"><!-- Image 3 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/031.png" width="300" height="308"
+alt="These Beasts Are All Clodhoppers, and their Feet Are Hobnailed Boots.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+To a man who thinks, it is very interesting to observe that beasts have
+been led along gradually in the very same direction. All the common
+beasts, such as cats, dogs, rats, stoats, and so on, have five ordinary
+toes. On the hind feet there may be only four. But as soon as we come to
+those that feed on grass and leaves, standing or walking all the while,
+we find that the feet are shod with hoofs instead of being tipped with
+claws. First the five toes, though clubbed together, have each a
+separate hoof, as in the elephant; then the hippopotamus follows with
+four toes, and the rhinoceros with practically three. These beasts are
+all clodhoppers, and their feet are hobnailed boots. The more active
+deer and all cattle keep only two toes for practical purposes, though
+stumps of two more remain. Finally, the horse gathers all its foot into
+one boot, and becomes the champion runner of the world.
+</p>
+<p>
+It is not without significance that this degeneracy of the feet goes
+with a decline in the brain, whether as cause or effect I will not
+pretend to know. These hoofed beasts have shallow natures and live
+shallow lives. They eat what is spread by Nature before their noses,
+have no homes, and do nothing but feed and fight with each other. The
+elephant is a notable exception, but then the nose of the elephant,
+becoming a hand, has redeemed its mind. As for the horse, whatever its
+admirers may say, it is just a great ass. There is a lesson in all this:
+"from him that hath not shall be taken even that which he hath."
+</p>
+<p>
+There is another dull beast which, from the point of view of the mere
+systematist, seems as far removed from those that wear hoofs as it could
+be, but the philosopher, considering the point at which it has arrived,
+rather than the route by which it got there, will class it with them,
+for its idea of life is just theirs turned topsy-turvy. The nails of the
+sloth, instead of being hammered into hoofs on the hard ground, have
+grown long and curved, like those of a caged bird, and become hooks by
+which it can hang, without effort, in the midst of the leaves on which
+it feeds. A minimum of intellect is required for such an existence, and
+the sloth has lost any superfluous brain that it may have had, as well
+as two, or even three, of its five toes.
+</p>
+<p>
+To return to those birds and beasts with standard feet, I find that the
+first outside purpose for which they find them serviceable is to scratch
+themselves. This is a universal need. But a foot is handy in many other
+ways. A hen and chickens, getting into my garden, transferred a whole
+flower-bed to the walk in half an hour. Yet a bird trying to do anything
+with its foot is like a man putting on his socks standing, and birds as
+a race have turned their feet to very little account outside of their
+original purpose. Such a simple thing as holding down its food with one
+foot scarcely occurs to an ordinary bird. A hen will pull about a
+cabbage leaf and shake it in the hope that a small piece may come away,
+but it never enters her head to put her foot on it. In this and other
+matters the parrot stands apart, and also the hawk, eagle, and owl; but
+these are not ordinary birds.
+</p>
+<p>
+Beasts, having twice as many feet as birds, have learned to apply them
+to many uses. They dig with them, hold down their food with them, fondle
+their children with them, paw their friends, and scratch their enemies.
+One does more of one thing and another of another, and the feet soon
+show the effects of the occupation, the claws first, then the muscles,
+and even the bones dwindling by disuse, or waxing stout and strong. Then
+the joy of doing what it can do well impels the beast further on the
+same path, and its offspring after it.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-4"><!-- Image 4 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/034.png" width="450" height="771"
+alt="The Nose of the Elephant Becoming a Hand Has Redeemed Its Mind">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+And this leads at last to specialism. The Indian black bear is a "handy
+man," like the British Tar&mdash;good all round. Its great soft paw is a very
+serviceable tool and weapon, armed with claws which will take the face
+off a man or grub up a root with equal ease. When a black bear has found
+an ant-hill it takes but a few minutes to tear up the hard, cemented
+clay and lay the deep galleries bare; then, putting its gutta-percha
+muzzle to the mouth of each, it draws such a blast of air through them
+that the industrious labourers are sucked into its gullet in drifts.
+Afterwards it digs right down to the royal chamber, licks up the bloated
+queen, and goes its way.
+</p>
+<p>
+But there is another worker in the same mine which does not go to work
+this way. The ant-eater found fat termites so satisfying that it left
+all other things and devoted its life to the exploiting of anthills, and
+now it has no rival at that business, but it is fit for nothing else.
+Its awkward digging tools will not allow it to put the sole of its foot
+to the ground, so it has to double them under and hobble about like a
+Chinese lady. It has no teeth, and stupidity is the most prominent
+feature of its character. It has become that poor thing, a man of one
+idea.
+</p>
+<p>
+But the bear is like a sign-post at a parting of the ways. If you
+compare a brown bear with the black Indian, or sloth bear, as it is
+sometimes called, you may detect a small but pregnant difference. When
+the former walks, its claws are lifted, so that their points do not
+touch the ground. Why? I have no information, but I know that it is not
+content with a vegetarian diet, like its black relative, but hankers
+after sheep and goats, and I guess that its murderous thoughts flow down
+its nerves to those keen claws. It reminds me of a man clenching his
+fist unconsciously when he thinks of the liar who has slandered him.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-5"><!-- Image 5 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/036.png" width="600" height="409"
+alt="It Has to Double them Under and Hobble About Like a Chinese Lady.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+But what ages of concentration on the thought and practice of
+assassination must have been required to perfect that most awful weapon
+in Nature, the paw of a tiger, or, indeed, of any cat, for they are all
+of one pattern. The sharpened flint of the savage has become the
+scimitar of Saladin, keeping the keenness of its edge in a velvet sheath
+and flashing out only on the field of battle. Compare that paw with the
+foot of a dog, and you will, perhaps, see with me that the servility and
+pliancy of the slave of man has usurped a place in his esteem which is
+not its due. The cat is much the nobler animal. Dogs, with wolves,
+jackals, and all of their kin, love to fall upon their victim in
+overwhelming force, like a rascally mob, and bite, tear, and worry until
+the life has gone out of it; the tiger, rushing single-handed, with a
+fearful challenge, on the gigantic buffalo, grasps its nose with one paw
+and its shoulder with the other, and has broken its massive neck in a
+manner so dexterous and instantaneous that scarcely two sportsmen can
+agree about how the thing is done.
+</p>
+<p>
+I have said that the foot first appeared when the backboned creatures
+came out of the waters to live upon the dry land. But all mundane things
+(not excepting politics) tend to move in circles, ending where they
+began; and so the foot, if we follow it far enough, will take us back
+into water. See how the rat&mdash;I mean our common, omnivorous, scavenging,
+thieving, poaching brown rat&mdash;when it lives near a pond or stream,
+learns to swim and dive as naturally as a duck. Next comes the vole, or
+water-rat, which will not live away from water. Then there are water
+shrews, the beaver, otter, duck-billed platypus, and a host of others,
+not related, just as, among birds, there are water ousels, moorhens,
+ducks, divers, etc., which have permanently made the water their home
+and seek their living in it. All these have attained to web-footedness
+in a greater or less degree.
+</p>
+<p>
+That this has occurred among reptiles, beasts, and birds alike shows
+what an easy, or natural, or obvious (put it as you will) modification
+it is. And it has a consequence not to be escaped. Just as a man who
+rides a great deal and never walks acquires a certain indirectness of
+the legs, and you never mistake a jockey for a drill-sergeant, so the
+web-footed beasts are not among the things that are "comely in going."
+</p>
+<p>
+Following this road you arrive at the seal and sea-lion. Of all the feet
+that I have looked at I know only one more utterly ridiculous than the
+twisted flipper on which the sea-lion props his great bulk in front,
+and that is the forked fly-flap which extends from the hinder parts of
+the same. How can it be worth any beast's while to carry such an absurd
+apparatus with it just for the sake of getting out into the air
+sometimes and pushing itself about on the ice and being eaten by Polar
+bears? The porpoise has discarded one pair, turned the other into decent
+fins, and recovered a grace and power of motion in water which are not
+equalled by the greyhound on land. Why have the seals hung back? I
+believe I know the secret. It is the baby! No one knows where the
+porpoise and the whale cradle their newborn infants&mdash;it is so difficult
+to pry into the domestic ways of these sea-people&mdash;but evidently the
+seals cannot manage it, so they are forced to return to the land when
+the cares of maternity are on them.
+</p>
+<p>
+I have called the feet of these sea beasts ridiculous things, and so
+they are as we see them; but strip off the skin, and lo! there appears a
+plain foot, with its five digits, each of several joints, tipped with
+claws&mdash;nowise essentially different, in short, from that with which the
+toad, or frog, first set out in a past too distant for our infirm
+imagination. Admiration itself is paralysed by a contrivance so simple,
+so transmutable, and so sufficient for every need that time and change
+could bring.
+</p>
+<p>
+There remains yet one transformation which seems simple compared with
+some that I have noticed, but is more full of fate than they all; for
+by it the foot becomes a hand. This comes about by easy stages. The
+reason why one of a bird's four toes is turned back is quite plain:
+trees are the proper home of birds, and they require feet that will
+grasp branches. So those beasts also that have taken to living in trees
+have got one toe detached more or less from the rest and arranged so
+that it can co-operate with them to catch hold of a thing. Then other
+changes quickly follow. For, in judging whether you have got hold of a
+thing and how much force you must put forth to keep hold of it, you are
+guided entirely by the pressure on the finger-points, and to gauge this
+pressure nicely the nerves must be refined and educated. In fact, the
+exercise itself, with the intent direction of the mind to the
+finger-points, brings about the refinement and education in accordance
+with Sandow's principle of muscle culture.
+</p>
+<p>
+For an example of the result do not look at the gross paw of any
+so-called anthropoid ape, gorilla, orang-outang, or chimpanzee, but
+study the gentle lemur. At the point of each digit is a broad elastic
+pad, plentifully supplied with delicate nerves, and the vital energy
+which has been directed into them appears to have been withdrawn from
+the growth of the claws, which have shrunk into fine nails just
+shielding the fleshy tips. In short, the lemur has a hand on each of its
+four limbs, and no feet at all. And as it goes about its cage&mdash;I am at
+the Zoo in spirit&mdash;with a silent wonder shining out of its great eyes,
+it examines things by <i>feeling</i> them with its hands.
+</p>
+<p>
+How plainly a new avenue from the outer world into its mind has been
+opened by those fingers! But how about scratching? What would be the
+gain of having higher susceptibilities and keener perceptions if they
+only aggravated the triumph of the insulting flea? Nay, this disaster
+has been averted by reserving a good sharp claw on the forefinger (not
+the thumb) of each hind hand.
+</p>
+<p>
+The old naturalists called the apes and lemurs Quadrumana, the
+"four-handed," and separated the Bimana, with one species&mdash;namely, <i>Homo
+sapiens</i>. Now we have anatomy cited to belittle the difference between a
+hand and a foot, and geology importuned to show us the missing link,
+pending which an order has been instituted roomy enough to hold monkeys,
+gorillas, and men. It is a strange perversity. How much more fitting it
+were to bow in reverent ignorance before the perfect hand, taken up from
+the ground, no more to dull its percipient surfaces on earth and stones
+and bark, but to minister to its lord's expanding mind and obey his
+creative will, while his frame stands upright and firm upon a single
+pair of true feet, with their toes all in one rank.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_3"><!-- RULE4 3 --></a>
+<h2>
+ II
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+BILLS OF BIRDS
+</center>
+<p>
+The prospectus, or advertisement, of a certain American typewriting
+machine commences by informing the public that "The &mdash;&mdash; typewriter is
+founded on an idea." When I saw this phrase I secured it for my
+collection, for I felt that, without jest, it contained the kernel of a
+true philosophy of Nature. The forms, the <i>phainomena</i>, of Nature are
+innumerable, multifarious, interwoven, and infinitely perplexing, and
+you may spend a happy life in unravelling their relations and devising
+their evolutions; but until you have looked through them and seen the
+ideas that are behind them you are a mere materialist and a blind
+worker. The soul of Nature is hid from you.
+</p>
+<p>
+What is the bill of a bird and what does it mean? I do not refer to the
+bill of a hawk, or a heron, or an owl, or an ostrich, but to that which
+is the abstract of all these and a thousand more. I hold, regardless of
+anatomy and physiology, that a bird is a higher being than a beast. No
+beast soars and sings to its sweetheart; no beast remains in lifelong
+partnership with the wife of its youth; no beast builds itself a
+summer-house and decks it with feathers and bright shells. A beast is a
+grovelling denizen of the earth; a bird is a free citizen of the air.
+And who can say that there is not a connection between this difference
+and other developments? The beast, thinking only of its appetites, has
+evolved a delicate nose, a discriminating palate, three kinds of teeth
+to cut, tear, and grind its food, salivary glands to moisten the same,
+and a perfected apparatus of digestion.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-6"><!-- Image 6 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/043.png" width="450" height="593"
+alt="Good for any Rough Job">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+The bird, occupied with thoughts of love and beauty, with "fields, or
+waves, or mountains" and "shapes of sky or plain," has made little
+advance in the art and instruments of good living. It swallows its food
+whole, scarcely knowing the taste of it, and a pair of forceps for
+picking it up, tipped and cased with horn, is the whole of its dining
+furniture. For the bill of a bird, primarily and essentially, is that
+and nothing else. In the chickens and the sparrows that come to steal
+their food, and the robin that looks on, and all the little dicky-birds,
+you may see it in its simplicity. The size and shape may vary, as a
+Canadian axe differs from a Scotch axe; some are short and stout and
+have a sharp edge for shelling seeds; some are longer and fine-pointed,
+for picking worms and caterpillars out of their hiding-places; some a
+little hooked at their points, and one, that of the crossbill, with
+points crossed for picking the small seeds out of fir-cones; but all
+are practically the same tool. Yet the last distinctly points the way to
+those modifications by which the simple bill is gradually adapted to one
+special purpose or another, until it becomes a wonderful mechanism in
+which the original intention is quite out of sight.
+</p>
+<p>
+At this point I find an instructive parable in my tool chest. Fully half
+of the tools are just knives. A chisel is a knife, a plane is a knife
+set in a block of wood, a saw is a knife with the edge notched.
+Moreover, there are many sorts of curious planes and saws, each intended
+for one distinct kind of fine work. All these the joiner has need of,
+but a schoolboy would rather have one good, strong pocket-knife than the
+whole boxful. For, just in proportion as each tool is perfected for its
+own special work, it becomes useless for any other. And your schoolboy
+is not a specialist. He wants a tool that will cut a stick, carve a
+boat, peel an apple, dig out a worm&mdash;in short, one that will do whatever
+his active mind wants done.
+</p>
+<p>
+Now apply this parable to the birds. If you see a bill that is nothing
+but a large and powerful pair of forceps, good for any rough job, you
+may know without further inquiry that the owner is no limited
+specialist, but a "handy man," bold, enterprising, resourceful, and good
+all round. He will not starve in the desert. No wholesome food comes
+amiss to him&mdash;grub, slug, or snail, fruit, eggs, a live mouse or a dead
+rat, and he can deal with them all. Such are the magpie, the crow, the
+jackdaw, and all of that ilk; and these are the birds that are found in
+all countries and climates, and prosper wherever they go.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-7"><!-- Image 7 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/046.png" width="500" height="366"
+alt="No Doubt Each Bird Swears by Its Own Pattern.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+But all birds cannot play that part. One is timid, another fastidious,
+another shy but ingenious. So, in the universal competition for a
+living, each has taken its own line according to the bent of its nature,
+and its one tool has been perfected for its trade until it can follow no
+other. The thrush catches such worms as rashly show themselves
+above-ground; but an ancient ancestor of the snipe found that, if it
+followed them into marshy lands, it could probe the soft ground and drag
+them out of their chambers. For this operation it has now a bill three
+inches long, straight, thin and sensitive at the tip, a beautiful
+instrument, but good for no purpose except extracting worms from soft
+ground. If frost or drought hardens the ground, the snipe must starve or
+travel. Among the many "lang nebbit" birds that follow the same
+profession as the snipe, some, like the curlew and the ibis, have curved
+bills of prodigious length. I do not know the comparative advantages of
+the two forms, but no doubt each bird swears by its own pattern, as
+every golfer does by his own putter.
+</p>
+<p>
+But now behold another grub-hunter, which, distasting mud, has
+discovered an unworked mine in the trunks of trees. There, in deep
+burrows, lurked great succulent beetle-grubs, demanding only a tool with
+which they might be dug out. This has been perfected by many stages, and
+I have now before me a splendid specimen of the most improved
+pattern&mdash;namely, the bill of the great black woodpecker of Western
+India, a bird nearly as big as a crow. It is nothing else than a hatchet
+in two parts, which, when locked together, present a steeled edge about
+three-eighths of an inch in breadth. The hatchet is two and a half
+inches long by one in breadth at the base, and a prominent ridge, or
+keel, runs down the top from base to point. It is further strengthened
+by a keel on each side. Inside of it, ere the bird became a mummy, was
+her tongue, which I myself drew out three inches beyond the point of the
+bill. It was rough and tough, like gutta-percha, tipped with a fine
+spike, and armed on each side, for the last inch of its length, with a
+row of sharp barbs pointing backwards. The whole was lubricated with
+some patent stickfast, "always ready for use." That grub must sit tight
+indeed which this corkscrew will not draw when once the hatchet has
+opened a way.
+</p>
+<p>
+The swallows and swifts, untirable on their wings, but too gentle to
+hold their own in a jostling crowd, soared away after the midges and
+May-flies and pestilent gnats that rise from marsh and pond to hold
+their joyous dances under the blue dome. Continually rushing
+open-mouthed after these, they have stretched their gape from ear to
+ear; but their bills have dwindled by disuse and left only an apology
+for their absence.
+</p>
+<p>
+Compared with all these, the birds that can do with a diet of fruit only
+lead an easy life. They have just to pluck and eat&mdash;that is, if they are
+pleased with small fruits and content to swallow them whole. But the
+hornbills, being too bulky to hop among twigs, need a long reach; hence
+the portentous machines which they carry on their faces. The beak of a
+hornbill is nothing else than a pair of tongs long enough to reach and
+strong enough to wrench off a wild fig from its thick stem. If it were
+of iron it would be thin and heavy; being of cellular horn-stuff it is
+bulky but light. If you ask why it should rise up into an absurd helmet
+on the queer fowl's head, I cannot tell. Nature has quaint ways of using
+up surplus material.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-8"><!-- Image 8 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/049.png" width="600" height="706"
+alt="Its Bill Deserves Study">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+An easy life begets luxury, and among fruit-eaters the parrot has become
+an epicure. It will not swallow its food whole, and its bill deserves
+study. In birds generally the upper mandible is more or less joined to
+the skull, leaving only the lower jaw free to move. But in the parrot
+the upper mandible is also hinged, so that each plays freely on the
+other. The upper, as we all know, is hooked and pointed; the lower has a
+sharp edge. The tongue is thick, muscular, and sensitive. The whole
+makes a wonderful instrument, unique among birds, for feelingly
+manipulating a dainty morsel, shelling, peeling, and slicing, until
+nothing is left but the sweetest part of the core. Of all gourmands
+Polly is the most shameless waster.
+</p>
+<p>
+Long before land, trees, and air had been exploited the primitive bird
+must have discovered the harvest of the waters, and here the competition
+has been very keen indeed. Yet the form of bill most in use is very
+simple&mdash;just a plain pair of forceps, long and sharp-pointed like
+scissors. This is evidently hard to beat, for birds of many sorts use
+it, handling it variously. The kingfisher plumps bodily down on the
+minnow from an overhanging perch; the solan goose, soaring, plunges from
+a "pernicious height"; the heron, high on its stilts, darts out a long
+and serpentine neck; the diver, with similar beak and neck, but
+different legs, pursues the fleeing shoals under water; to the swift and
+slippery fish all are alike terrible in their certainty.
+</p>
+<p>
+There are, however, other varieties of the fishing bill. Some have a
+hook at the point, as that of the cormorant, and some are straight at
+the top, but curved on the under side. This last form is handy for
+storks, which do not pluck fish out of water so much, but scoop up
+frogs, crabs, and reptiles from the ground. The ridiculous bill of the
+puffin, or sea-parrot, is an eccentricity. There may be some idea in it,
+but I suspect it is an effect of vanity merely, being coloured blue,
+yellow, and red, and quite in keeping with the other absurdities of the
+wearer.
+</p>
+<p>
+Apart from all these and by itself stands a princely fisher whose bill
+is no modification, but an original invention and a marvellous one.
+Larger than a swan and gluttonous withal, the pelican cannot live on
+single fishes. It has given up angling altogether and taken to netting;
+and the way in which the net has been constructed out of the pair of
+forceps provided in the original plan of its construction is as well
+worth your examining as anything I know. It is a foot in length, the
+upper jaw is flat and broad, while the lower consists of two thin,
+elastic bones joined at the point, a mere ring to carry the curious
+yellow bag that hangs from it. In pictures this is represented as a
+creel in which the kind pelican carries home the children's breakfast;
+you are allowed to see the tail of a big fish hanging out. But it is not
+a creel; it is a net. The great birds, marshalled in line on some broad
+lake or marsh, and beating the water with their wings, drive the fish
+before them until they have got a dense crowd huddled in panic and
+confusion between them and the shore. Now watch them narrowly. As
+each monstrous bill opens, the thin bones of the lower jaw stretch
+sideways to the breadth of a span by some curious mechanism not
+described in the books, and at the same time the shrunken bag expands
+into a deep, capacious net. Simultaneously the whole instrument is
+plunged into the struggling, silvery mass and comes up full. The side
+bones instantly contract again, and the upper jaw is clapped on them
+like a lid. No wonder the fishermen of the East detest the pelican.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-9"><!-- Image 9 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/052.png" width="600" height="345"
+alt="Here the Competition Has Been Very Keen indeed.">
+</center>
+
+
+<a name="image-10"><!-- Image 10 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/053.png" width="450" height="653"
+alt="As Wonderful As the Pelican, But How Opposite!">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+In the same marsh, perhaps, standing with unequalled grace upon the
+longest legs known in this world, is a troop of giant birds as wonderful
+as the pelican, but how opposite! The beautiful flamingo is a bird of
+feeble intellect, delicate appetite, and genteel tastes. It cannot eat
+fish, for its slender throat would scarcely admit a pea. Besides, the
+idea of catching anything, or even picking up food from the ground, does
+not occur to its simple mind. Its diet consists of certain small
+crustaceans, classed by naturalists with water-fleas, which abound in
+brackish water; and it has an instrument for taking these which it knows
+how to use. I kept flamingos once, and, after trying many things in
+vain, offered them bran, or boiled rice, floating in water. Then they
+dined, and I learned the construction and working of the most marvellous
+of all bills. The lower jaw is deep and hollow, and its upper edges turn
+in to meet each other, so that you may fairly describe it as a pipe
+with a narrow slit along the upper side. In this pipe lies the tongue,
+and it cannot get out, for it is wider than the slit, but it can be
+pressed against the top to close the slit, and then the lower jaw
+becomes an actual pipe. The root of the tongue is furnished on both
+sides with a loose fringe which we will call the first strainer. The
+upper jaw is thin and flat and rests on the lower like a lid, and it is
+beautifully fringed along both sides with small, leathery points, close
+set, like the teeth of a very fine saw. This is the second strainer. To
+work the machine you dip the point into dirty water full of water-fleas,
+draw back the tip of the tongue a little, and suck in water till the
+lower jaw (the pipe) is full, then close the point again with the tip of
+the tongue and force the water out. It can only get out by passing
+through the first strainers at the root of the tongue, then over the
+palate, and so through the second strainers at the sides of the bill;
+and all the solid matter it contained will remain in the mouth. The
+sucking in and squirting out of the water is managed by the cheeks, or
+rather by the cheek, for a flamingo has only one cheek, and that is
+situated under the chin. When the bird is feeding you will see this
+throbbing faster than the eye can follow it, while water squirts from
+the sides of the mouth in a continuous stream. I should have said that
+the whole bill is sharply bent downwards at the middle. The advantage of
+this is that when the bird lets down its head into the water, like a
+bucket into a well, the point of the bill does not stick in the mud, but
+lies flat on it, upside down.
+</p>
+<p>
+In conclusion, let us not fail to note, whatever be our political creed,
+that, while all the birds pursue their respective industries, there sit
+apart, in pride of place, some whose bills are not tools wherewith to
+work, but weapons wherewith to slay. And these take tribute of the rest,
+not with their consent, but of right.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_4"><!-- RULE4 4 --></a>
+<h2>
+ III
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+TAILS
+</center>
+<p>
+The secrets of Nature often play like an iridescence on the surface, and
+escape the eye of her worshipper because it is stopped with a
+microscope. There are mysteries all about us as omnipresent as the
+movement of the air that lifts the smoke and stirs the leaves, which I
+cannot find that any philosopher has looked into. Often and deeply have
+I been impressed with this. For example, there is scarcely, in this
+world, a commoner or a humbler thing than a tail, yet how multifarious
+is it in aspect, in construction, and in function, a hundred different
+things and yet one. Some are of feathers and some of hair, and some bare
+and skinny; some are long and some are short, some stick up and some
+hang down, some wag for ever and some are still; the uses that they
+serve cannot be numbered, but one name covers them all. In the course of
+evolution they came in with the fishes and went out with man. What was
+their purpose and mission? What place have they filled in the scheme of
+things? In short, what is the true inwardness of a tail?
+</p>
+<p>
+If we try to commence&mdash;as scientific method requires&mdash;with a
+definition, we stumble on a key, at the very threshold, which opens the
+door. For there is no definition of a tail; it is not, in its nature,
+anything at all. When an animal's fore-legs are fitted on to its
+backbone at the proper distance from the hind-legs, if any of the
+backbone remains over, we call it a tail. But it has no purpose; it is a
+mere surplus, which a tailor (the pun is unavoidable) would have trimmed
+off. And, lo! in this very negativeness lies the whole secret of the
+multifarious positiveness of tails. For the absence of special purpose
+is the chance of general usefulness. The ear must fulfil its purpose or
+fail entirely, for it can do nothing else. Eyes, nose and mouth, hands
+and feet, all have their duties; the tail is the unemployed. And if we
+allow that life has had any hand in the shaping of its own destiny, then
+the ingenuity of the devices for turning the useless member to account
+affords one of the most exhilarating subjects of contemplation in the
+whole panorama of Nature. The fishes fitted it up at once as a
+twin-propeller, with results so satisfactory that the whale and the
+porpoise, coming long after, adopted the invention. And be it noted that
+these last and their kin are now the only ocean-going mammals in the
+world. The whole tribe of paddle-steamers, such as seals and walruses
+and dugongs, are only coasters.
+</p>
+<p>
+Among those beasts that would live on the dry land, the primitive
+kangaroo could think of nothing better to do with his tail than to make
+a stool of it. It was a simple thought, but a happy one. Sitting up
+like a gentleman, he has his hands free to scratch his ribs or twitch
+his moustache. And when he goes he needs not to put them to the ground,
+for his great tail so nearly equals the weight of his body that one pair
+of legs keeps the balance even. And so the kangaroo, almost the lowest
+of beasts, comes closer to man in his postures than any other. The
+squirrel also sits up and uses his forepaws for hands, but the squirrel
+is a sybarite who lies abed in cold weather, and it is every way
+characteristic of him that he has sent his tail to the furrier and had
+it done up into a boa, or comforter, at once warm and becoming. See,
+too, how daintily he lifts it over his back to keep it clean. The rat is
+a near relation of the squirrel zoologically, but personally he is a
+gutter-snipe, and you may know that by one look at the tail which he
+drags after him like a dirty rope. Others of the same family, cleaner,
+though not more ingenious, like the guinea-pig, have simply dispensed
+with the encumbrance; but the rabbit has kept enough to make a white
+cockade, which it hoists when bolting from danger. This is for the
+guidance of the youngsters. Nearly every kind of deer and antelope
+carries the same signal, with which, when fleeing through dusky woods,
+the leader shows the way to the herd and the doe to her fawn.
+</p>
+<p>
+But of beasts that graze and browse, a large number have turned their
+tails rather to a use which throws a pathetic light on misery of which
+we have little experience. We do, indeed, growl at the gnats of a summer
+evening and think ourselves very ill-used. How little do we know or
+think of the unintermitted and unabated torment that the most harmless
+classes of beasts suffer from the bands of beggars which follow them
+night and day, demanding blood, and will take no refusal. Driven from
+the brow they settle on the neck, shaken from the neck they dive between
+the legs, and but for that far-reaching whisk at the end of the tail,
+they would found a permanent colony on the flanks and defy ejection,
+like the raiders of Vatersay. Darwin argues that the tail-brush may have
+materially helped to secure the survival of those species of beasts that
+possessed it, and no doubt he is right.
+</p>
+<p>
+The subject is interminable, but we must give a passing glance to some
+quixotic tails. The opossum scampers up a tree, carrying all her
+numerous family on her back, and they do not fall off because each
+infant is securely moored by its own tail to the uplifted tail of its
+mother. The opossum is a very primitive beast, and so early and useful
+an invention should, one would think, have been spread widely in after
+time; but there appears to be some difficulty in developing muscles at
+the thin end of a long tail, for the animals that have turned it into a
+grasping organ are few and are widely scattered. Examples are the
+chameleon among lizards, our own little harvest mouse, and, pre-eminent
+above all, the American monkeys. To a howler, or spider-monkey, its
+long tail is a swing and a trapeze in its forest gymnasium. Humboldt saw
+(he says it) a cluster of them all hanging from a tree by one tail,
+which proceeded from a Sandow in the middle. I should like to see that
+too. It is worth noting, by the way, that no old-world monkey has
+attained to this application of its tail.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then there is the beaver, whose tail I am convinced is a trowel. I know
+of no naturalist who has mentioned this, but such negative evidence is
+of little weight. The beaver, as everybody knows, is a builder, who cuts
+down trees and piles log upon log until he has raised a solid, domed
+cabin from seven to twenty feet in diameter, which he then plasters over
+with clay and straw. If he does not turn round and beat the work smooth
+with his tail, then I require to know for what purpose he carries that
+broad, heavy, and hard tool behind him.
+</p>
+<p>
+How few even among lovers of Nature know why a frog has no tail! The
+reason-is simply that it used that organ up when it was in want. In
+early life, as a jolly tadpole, it had a flourishing tail to swim with,
+and gills for breathing water, and an infantile mouth for taking
+vegetable nourishment. But when it began to draw near to frog's estate,
+serious changes were required in its structure to fit it for the life of
+a land animal. Four tiny legs appeared from under its skin, the gills
+gave place to air-breathing lungs, and the infant lips to a great,
+gaping mouth. Now, during this "temporary alteration of the premises"
+all business was of necessity stopped. The half-fish, half-frog could
+neither sup like an infant nor eat like a man. In this extremity it fed
+on its own tail&mdash;absorbed it as a camel is said to absorb its hump when
+travelling in the foodless desert&mdash;and so it entered on its new life
+without one.
+</p>
+<p>
+Aeronautics have changed the whole perspective of life for birds, as
+they may for us shortly; so it is no surprise to find that birds have,
+almost with one consent, converted their tails into steering-gear. A
+commonplace bird, like a sparrow, scarcely requires this except as a
+brake when in the act of alighting; but to those birds with which flight
+is an art and an accomplishment, an expansive forked or rounded tail
+(there are two patents) is indispensable. We have shot almost all the
+birds of this sort in our own country, and must travel if we would enjoy
+that enchanting sight&mdash;a pair of eagles or a party of kites gone aloft
+for a sail when the wind is rising, like skaters to a pond when the ice
+is bearing. For an hour on end, in restful ease or swift joy, they trace
+ever-varying circles and spirals against the dark storm-cloud, now
+rising, now falling, turning and reversing, but never once flapping
+their widespread pinions.
+</p>
+<p>
+How is it done? How does the <i>Shamrock</i> sail? Watch, and you will see.
+When the wind is behind, each stiff quill at the end of the wing stands
+out by itself and is caught and driven by the blast; but as the bird
+turns round to face the gale, they all close up and form a continuous
+mainsail, close-hauled. And all the while the expanded tail is in play,
+dipping first at one side and then at the other, and turning the trim
+craft with easy grace "as the governor listeth."
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-11"><!-- Image 11 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/063.png" width="600" height="405"
+alt="There Are Some Eccentrics, Such As Jenny Wren, Which Have Despised their Tails.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+Besides ground birds, like the quail, there are some eccentrics, such as
+Jenny wren, which have despised their tails, and there are specialists
+also which require them for other purposes than flying. The woodpecker's
+tail is quite useless as a rudder, for he is a woodman and has altered
+and adapted it for a portable stool to rest against as he plies his axe.
+</p>
+<p>
+But that man must be very blind to the place which birds have taken in
+the progress of civilisation who can suppose it possible that they
+should think only of utility in such a question as the disposal of their
+tails. It is a common notion among those who have acquired some
+smattering of the theory of evolution that fishes developed into
+reptiles, reptiles into birds, and birds into beasts; but this is as
+wrong as it could be. Whatever the genealogy of the beasts may be, they
+certainly were not evolved from birds, and are in many respects not
+above them but below them. These are two independent branches of the
+tree of living forms, as the Greeks and Romans were branches of the
+stock of Japheth. The beasts may stand for the conquering Romans if you
+like, but the birds are the Greeks, and have advanced far beyond them in
+all emotional and artistic sensibility. They worship in the temple of
+music and beauty. And, like ourselves, they have found no subject so
+worthy of the highest efforts of art as their own dress. But the
+clothing of the body must conform more or less to the figure, and so,
+for a field in which invention and fancy may sport untrammelled, a lady
+turns to her hat and a bird to its tail. And by both, with equal
+heroism, every consideration of mere comfort, convenience, health, or
+safety is swept aside in obedience to the higher aim. Is this only a
+flippant jocularity, or is there here in very truth some profound law of
+the mind revealing itself in spheres seemingly so disconnected?
+</p>
+<p>
+Look at a peacock. Its train, by the way, is a false tail, like the
+chignon of twenty years ago, or the fringe of the present day; the true
+tail is under it, and serves no purpose but to support it. Now the
+peacock lives on the ground, among scrub and brushwood, haunted by
+jackals and wild cats. They, like soldiers in khaki, reconnoitre him in
+a uniform expressly designed to elude the eye, but he flaunts a flag
+resplendent with green and gold. And when his one chance of life lies in
+springing nimbly from the ground and committing himself to his strong
+wings, he must lift and carry this ponderous paraphernalia with him. And
+the terrible Bonelli's eagle is soaring above. But all is risked proudly
+for the sake of the morning hour in the glade where the ladies assemble.
+And the peacock is only one of many. Not to mention the lyre bird, the
+Argus pheasant, the bird of paradise, and other splendid examples, there
+are common dicky-birds which point the moral and adorn the tail as
+emphatically.
+</p>
+<p>
+If the tail is a rudder, where should you look to find it in its most
+simple and efficient form but among the flycatchers, which make their
+living by aerial acrobatics after flies? Yet this family seems to be
+peculiarly prone to the vanity of a stylish tail. The paradise
+flycatcher flutters two streamers a foot long, like white ribbons,
+behind it. The fantail could hide behind its own fan. The bee-eater has
+the two central feathers prolonged and pointed. The drongos, which are
+flycatchers in habit, wear their tails very long and deeply forked; and
+one of them, the racket-tailed drongo, has the two side feathers
+extended beyond the rest for nearly a foot, and as thin as wires,
+expanding into a blade at the ends. I have seen nothing in ladies' hats
+more preposterous. It is vain to object that there can be no proper
+comparison between tails and hats because the woman chooses her own hat
+while the bird has to wear what Nature has given it. I know that, but
+the contention is utterly superficial. What choice has a woman as to the
+style of her hat? Fashion prescribes for her, and Nature for the birds;
+that is all the difference. No doubt she acquiesces when theoretically
+she might rebel. The bird cannot rebel, but does it not acquiesce? Does
+a lyre bird submit to its tail&mdash;wear it under protest, so to speak?
+Believe me, every bird that has an aesthetic tail knows the fact, and
+tries to live up to it. We may push the argument even further, for the
+motmot of Brazil is not content with a ready-made tail, but actually
+strips the web off the two long side feathers with its own beak, except
+a little patch at the end, so as to get the pattern which Nature, if one
+must use the phrase, gave to the racket-tailed drongo. A specimen is
+exhibited in the hall of the South Kensington Museum.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-12"><!-- Image 12 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/067.png" width="600" height="428"
+alt="A Blackbird and a Starling&mdash;the one Lifts Its Skirts, While the Other Wears a Walking Dress.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+In this connection I may also say that the shape or colour of a tail is
+not everything. An observant eye may find much to note in the wearing of
+them. There is a stylish way of carrying a tail and a slovenly way, and
+there are coquettish arts for the display of recherche tails. A
+blackbird and a starling are both tidy birds, and both walk much on the
+ground, but the one lifts its skirts, while the other, more practical
+and less fashionable, wears a walking dress and saves itself trouble.
+</p>
+<p>
+This line of observation leads to a higher, and reveals the most
+important purpose that tails have served in the economy of beast, bird,
+and reptile, and, perhaps, even cold-blooded fish. Before the godlike
+countenance of man appeared on the earth, with its contractile forehead
+and erectile eyebrows, the answering light of the eye, the expansive
+nostrils, and subtilely mobile lips; before that the tail was the prime
+vehicle of emotion and safety-valve of passion. It is a great truth, too
+often buried in these days under rubbish of materialistic theories, that
+some way of self-manifestation is a supreme necessity of all sentient
+life. From the hot centre of thought and feeling the currents rush along
+the nervous ways and pervade the whole frame, seeking an outlet. But
+many passages are barred by duty, or fear, or eager purpose. A strong
+gust of passion may burst all barriers and force its way out at every
+point, but gentle currents flow along the lines of least resistance and
+find the idle tail. I do not know a better illustration of this than a
+cat watching a mouse. The ears are pricked forward, the eyes are fixed
+on the unsuspecting victim, every muscle of the legs is tense, like a
+bent bow ready to speed the arrow on its way. But see, the excitement
+with which the whole body is charged cannot be wholly restrained, and
+oozes out at the point of the tail.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-13"><!-- Image 13 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/069.png" width="600" height="336"
+alt="At the Sight of a Rival the Dog Holds Its Tail up Stiffly">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+Every emotion and passion takes this course. The happy kid wags its tail
+as it runs to its mother, the donkey when it has executed a successful
+bray, and the dog when it sees its master. At the sight of a rival the
+dog holds its tail up stiffly, unless, indeed, the rival is a bigger dog
+than itself, in which case the index goes down quickly between the legs.
+An elated horse elevates its tail, and so does a duck in the same mood.
+A lizard preparing to fight another lizard
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p> Swinges the scaly horror of his folded tail,</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+and the raging lion of fiction lashes its sides with the same nervous
+instrument.
+</p>
+<p>
+It would be tedious to dwell on the pretty part which the tail plays in
+the courtships of sparrows and pigeons, or on the sprightly attitudes by
+which birds of all sorts let off their spirits when shower and sunshine
+have overfilled their hearts with gladness. But birds twitch their tails
+constantly, without meaning anything by it. The ceaseless wagging of a
+wagtail is a mere habit of cheerfulness, like the twirling of her thumbs
+by an idle Scotswoman. The long tail is there and something must be done
+with it. Look at the embarrassment which a nervous young man shows about
+the disposal of his hands; how he thrusts them into his trouser pockets,
+hangs them by their thumbs from the arm-holes of his waistcoat, or gives
+them a walking-stick to play with. I like to imagine what such a fellow
+would do with a long tail if he had it&mdash;how he would wind it round each
+leg in turn, rub up his back hair, and describe figures on the floor.
+But no animal so self-conscious as man could bear up long under the
+nervous strain of having to think continually of its tail. It would die
+young and the race would become extinct. Perhaps it did.
+</p>
+<p>
+A final word on the conclusion of the whole matter, for these
+reflections have a moral. As habit becomes character, so expression
+hardens into feature. The tail of a sheep grows downwards, but that of a
+goat upwards, and this is the only infallible outward mark of
+distinction between the two animals. But it is the permanent record of a
+long history. The sheep was never anything but sheepish; the goat and
+its forefathers were pert as kids and insolent when their beards grew.
+It is useless to inquire why insolence should express itself by an
+upturned tail until someone can advance a reason why it should express
+itself in another way.
+</p>
+<p>
+For proof of the fact you need go no farther than your own dogs. The
+ancestral wolf, or jackal, hunting and fighting, fearing and hoping,
+showed every changing mood by the pose of its tail; but a change came
+when it acquired an assured position of security and importance as the
+chosen companion of man, so dreaded by all its kith and kin. The tail
+went up at once and stayed there; when it could go no higher, it curled
+over. But promotion breeds conceit only in base natures. The greyhound
+is a gentleman, respectful and self-respecting, and it shows that by the
+very carriage of its tail. Only a snob at heart, petted and pampered for
+many generations, could have produced that perfect incarnation of smug
+self-satisfaction, the pug. Let us take the lesson home. The thoughts on
+which we let our minds dwell, and the sentiments that we harbour in our
+hearts, are the chisels with which we are carving out our faces and
+those of our children's children.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_5"><!-- RULE4 5 --></a>
+<h2>
+ IV
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+NOSES
+</center>
+<p>
+Some may think that I have chosen a trivial subject, and they will look
+for frivolous treatment of it. I can only hope that they will be
+disappointed. There is nothing that the progress of science has taught
+us more emphatically than this&mdash;that we must call nothing insignificant.
+Seemingly trivial pursuits have led to discoveries which have benefited
+all mankind, and priceless truths have been dug out of the most
+unpromising mines. I am not insinuating that anyone's nose is an
+unpromising mine, but I say that I am persuaded there is wisdom hidden
+in that organ for him who will observingly distil it out.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-14"><!-- Image 14 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/073.png" width="600" height="387"
+alt="A Shrew Can Do It, But Not a Man.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+It possesses a peculiar and mystical significance not shared by any
+other feature. This is abundantly proved by common speech, which is one
+of the most trustworthy of all kinds of evidence. For example, we speak
+of a person turning up his nose at a good offer. The phrase is absurd,
+for the power of turning up his nose is one which no human being ever
+possessed. A shrew can do it, but not a man. Yet the meaning of the
+saying needs no interpretation. Akin to it is the classical phrase,
+<i>adunco suspendere naso</i>. What Horace means scarcely requires
+explanation, but no commentator has successfully explained it. These
+expressions well illustrate the mystery that enshrouds our most salient
+feature. They show that, while everybody can see that disdain is
+expressed through the nose, nobody can define how it is done. Then there
+is that curious expression "put his nose out of joint," which is quite
+inexplicable, the nose being destitute of joint. There are many other
+phrases and also gestures which point in the same direction, but need
+not be cited, being for the most part vulgar. Allusions to the nose have
+a tendency to be vulgar, which is another mystery inciting us to
+investigate it. So let us proceed.
+</p>
+<p>
+The first thing required by the principles of scientific precedure is a
+definition. What is a nose? But this proves to be a much more difficult
+question than anyone would suspect before he tried to answer it. The
+individual human nose we can recognise, describe or sketch more easily
+than any other feature, but try to define the thing <i>nose</i> in Nature and
+it is a most elusive phenomenon. When we speak of a man being led by the
+nose we imply that it is a part of him which is prominent and situated
+in front, when we speak of keeping one's nose above water we refer to it
+as the breathing orifice, but when we say that this or that offends our
+nose we are regarding it as the seat of the sense of smell. I believe
+that all these three ideas must be included in any definition. It should
+follow that insects, which breathe through holes in their sides, cannot
+have noses, and this is the truth.
+</p>
+<p>
+Fishes, too, though they may have snouts, have not noses, because they
+breathe by gills. In truth, it seems that the nose was a very late and
+high acquisition, almost the finishing touch of the perfected animal
+form. And incidentally this leads us to notice what a great step was
+taken in evolution when the breathing holes were brought up to the
+region of the mouth. For the sense of taste is necessarily situated in
+the mouth, and the sense of smell is in close alliance with it. The
+mouth tastes food dissolved in the saliva during the process of
+mastication, and the primary use of the sense of smell is to detect and
+analyse beforehand the small particles given off by food and floating in
+the atmosphere.
+</p>
+<p>
+A good many years ago, when the late Sally chimpanzee was the darling of
+the Zoological Gardens in Regent's Park, I watched her eating dates. She
+was an epicure, and always peeled each date delicately with her
+preposterous lips before eating it, and during the process she would
+apply the date to her nose every second to test its quality or enjoy its
+aroma. The action was indescribably comical, but what would it have been
+if her nostrils had been situated among her ribs? Imagine a mantis, for
+example, as he chews up a fly, lifting one of his wings and applying it
+to his flanks to see if it smells gamey. That is where some naturalists
+believe that the sense of smell is situated in insects. Others, however,
+think, with reason, that it is in the antennae or mouth. Nobody knows;
+the senses of the lower animals seem to be stuck about all parts of the
+body.
+</p>
+<p>
+But, even if the sense of smell is at the mouth, how limited must its
+usefulness be when it can only deal with substances that are held to it!
+A new era dawned when the passages by which the breath of life
+unceasingly comes and goes were transferred to the region of the mouth
+also. The nerves of smell quickly spread themselves over the lining
+membrane of those passages and became warders of the gate, challenging
+every waft of air that entered the body and examining what it carried.
+Thenceforth this region comprising the mouth, nostrils and surrounding
+parts holds a new and high place in the economy of the body, for the
+headquarters of the intelligence department are located there, and all
+the faculties of the brain converge on that point. Of course, the eyes
+and ears claim a share, but they are not far off.
+</p>
+<p>
+Now it is being recognised more and more clearly by medical and
+physiological science that when the mind is much directed to any part of
+the body it exercises an influence in some way not understood on the
+flow of blood to that part to a degree which may seriously affect its
+functions and even its growth. When a person is suffering from any
+nervous affection, from heart disease, or even from weakness of the
+eyes, it is of the utmost importance to keep him from knowing it if
+possible, for if he knows it he will think about it, and that will
+inevitably aggravate it. This principle is well recognised in systems of
+physical culture. And surely it is impossible that so much intelligence
+should pass through that one sensitive region of the body which we are
+considering without affecting its growth and structure. Every muscle in
+it becomes quick to respond to various sensations in different ways,
+till the very recollection of those sensations will excite the same
+response.
+</p>
+<p>
+Nay, we may go further. The mental emotions excited by those sensations
+will be expressed in the same way. For example, the sense of smell is
+peculiarly effective in exciting disgust. Anything which does violence
+to the sense of hearing exasperates, but does not disgust. If a man
+practises the accordion all day in the next room you do not loathe him,
+you only want to kill him. But anything that stinks excites pure
+disgust. Here you have the key to the fact that disgust and all feelings
+akin to it, disdain, contempt and scorn, express themselves through the
+nose. Darwin says that when we think of anything base or vile in a man's
+character the expression of the face is the same "as if we smelled a bad
+smell." This is an example of the temporary expression of a passing
+emotion, and there are many others like it. But each of us has his
+prevailing and dominant emotions which constitute the habitual
+attitude of his mind. And by the habitual indulgence of any emotion the
+features will become habituated to the expression of it, and so the set
+of our features comes at last to express our prevailing and dominant
+emotions; in other words, our <i>character</i>.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-15"><!-- Image 15 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/078.png" width="500" height="632"
+alt="The Nostrils of the Apteryx Are at the Tip of Its Beak.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+But let us return to the evolution of the nose. In these days of
+universal "Nature study" nobody need be told that the practice of
+breathing through the nostrils was introduced by the amphibians and
+reptiles. The former (frogs and toads) take to it only when they come of
+age, but lizards, snakes and all other reptiles do it from infancy. But
+the nose is not yet. That is something too delicate to come out of a
+cold-blooded snout covered with hard scales. Birds, too, by having their
+mouth parts encased in a horny bill seem to be debarred from wearing
+noses. And yet there is one primeval fowl, most ancient of all the
+feathered families, which has come near it. I mean the apteryx, that
+eccentric, wingless recluse which hides itself in the scrub jungles of
+New Zealand. Its nostrils, unlike those of every other bird, are at the
+tip of its beak, which is swollen and sensitive; and Dr. Buller says
+that as it wanders about in the night it makes a continual sniffing and
+softly taps the walls of its cage with the point of its bill. But the
+apteryx is one of those odd geniuses which come into the world too soon,
+and perish ineffectual. Its kindred are all extinct, and so will it be
+ere long.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-16"><!-- Image 16 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/080.png" width="450" height="508"
+alt="A Bold attempt to Grow in the Case of a Tapir">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+When we come to the beasts we find the right conditions at last for the
+growth of the nose. Take the horse for an example of the average beast
+without idiosyncrasy. Its profile is nearly a straight line from the
+crown to the nostrils, beyond which it slopes downwards to the lips. The
+skin of this part is soft and smooth, without hair, and the horse dearly
+loves to have it fondled. The sense of touch is evidently uppermost. At
+this stage there was what to the eye of fancy looks like a bold attempt
+to grow a nose in the case of a tapir, but it miscarried. These hoofed
+beasts are all very hard up for something in the way of a hand to bring
+their food to their mouths. The camel employs its lips and the cow its
+tongue; the muntjae or barking deer of India has attained a tongue of
+such length that it uses it for a handkerchief to wipe its eyes. So the
+tapir could not resist the temptation to misapply its nose to the
+purpose of gathering fodder, and the ultimate result was the elephant,
+whose nose is a wonderful hand and a bucket and other things. The pig,
+being a swine, debased its nose in a worse way, making a grubbing tool
+of it.
+</p>
+<p>
+There has been another attempt to misuse and pervert this part of the
+face which I scarcely dare to touch upon, for it is so utterly fantastic
+and mystical that I fear the charge of heresy if I give words to my
+thoughts. It occurs among bats, a tribe of obscure creatures about which
+common knowledge amounts to this, that they fly about after sunset, are
+uncanny, and fond of getting entangled in the hair of ladies, and should
+be killed. But there are certain families of bats, named horseshoe bats,
+leaf-nosed bats and vampires about which common knowledge is <i>nil</i>, and
+the knowledge possessed by naturalists very little, so I will tell what
+I know of them. They are larger than common bats, their wings are broad,
+soft and silent, like those of the owl, they sleep in caves, tombs and
+ruins, they do not flutter in the open air, but swiftly traverse gloomy
+avenues and shady glades, their prey is not gnats and midges, but the
+"droning beetle," the death's head moth, the cockchafer, croaking frogs,
+sleeping birds and <i>human blood</i>. The books will tell you that these
+bats are distinguished by "complicated nasal appendages consisting of
+foliaceous skin processes around the nostrils," which is quite true and
+utterly futile. It may do for a dried skin or a specimen in spirits of
+wine. I have had the foul fiend in a cage and looked him in the face.
+His whole countenance, from lips to brow and from cheek to cheek, is
+covered and hidden by a hideous design of
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p>Spells and signs,</p>
+ <p>Symbolic letters, circles, lines,</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+sculptured in living, quivering skin. It is a sight to make the flesh
+creep. The books suggest that these foliaceous appendages are the organs
+of some special sense akin to touch. Futile again! There are things in
+Nature still which prompt the naturalist who has not atrophied his inner
+eye and starved his imagination to cry out:
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p>Science ...</p>
+ <p>Why preyest thou thus upon the poet's heart,</p>
+ <p>Vulture, whose wings are dull realities?</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+Supposing there should be in the unseen universe an evil spirit, an imp
+of malice and mischief, not Milton's Satan, but the Deil of Burns:</p>
+
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p class="i2">Whyles ranging, like a roaring lion,</p>
+ <p class="i2">For prey, a' holes an' corners tryin;</p>
+ <p>Whyles on the strong-winged tempest flyin,</p>
+ <p>Tirlin the kirks;</p>
+ <p>Whyles in the human bosom pryin,</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+
+<p class="cont">and supposing him to crave possession of a body through which he might
+get into touch with this material world and express himself in outward
+forms and motions; then oh! how fitly were this bat explained.
+</p>
+<p>
+But let us go back to firm ground. If you compare a dog's profile with
+that of a horse you will note at once that the nostrils are in advance
+of the lips, and have a kind of portal to themselves. This is a distinct
+advance. The sense of smell has come to the front and pushed aside the
+lower sense of touch. You will observe, too, that with the growth of the
+brain the brain-pan has elevated itself above the level of the nose.
+Through the cat to the monkeys the process proceeds, the forehead
+advancing, the jaws retreating, and the nostrils leaving the lips, until
+they finally settle in a detached villa midway between the eyes and the
+mouth. This is the nose. I do not know the use of it. I cannot fathom
+the meaning of it. It is a solemn mystery. See the face of an
+orang-outang. It is a <i>countenance</i>, a signboard with three distinct
+lines of writing on it, the eyes, the nose and the mouth. You may not
+think much of this particular nose. Neither do I. I think it is
+situated rather too near the eyes and too far from the mouth. It is a
+little too small also, and wants style. But you must not judge a first
+attempt too critically. I have seen human noses of a pattern not unlike
+this, but they are not considered aristocratic: perhaps they indicate a
+reversion to the ancestral type.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-17"><!-- Image 17 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/084.png" width="300" height="516"
+alt="I Have Seen Human Noses of a Pattern Not Unlike This, But they Are Not Considered Aristocratic.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+But the noses even of monkeys are not all like this. In fact, there is a
+good deal of variety, and two in particular have struck me as quite
+remarkable. One is that of the long-nosed monkey (<i>Semnopithecus
+nasalis</i>). I think it must have suggested Sterne's stranger on a mule,
+who had travelled to the promontory of noses and threw all Strassburg
+into a ferment. I have often contemplated this nose in mute wonderment,
+and longed to see that monkey in life, if so be I might arrive at some
+understanding of it; for the taxidermist cannot rise above his own
+level, and the man who would mount <i>S. nasalis</i> would need to be a Henry
+Irving. Then there is the sub-nosed monkey, labelled <i>rhinopithecus</i>, of
+which there is an expressive specimen at the South Kensington Museum.
+Who can consider that nose seriously and continue to believe in a
+recipe made up of struggle for existence, adaptation to environment, and
+natural selection <i>quantum suf</i>.? If I could dine with that monkey, ask
+it to drink a glass of wine with me, offer it a pinch of snuff and so
+on, I might come in time to feel, if not to comprehend, the import of
+its nose.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-18"><!-- Image 18 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/085.png" width="500" height="771"
+alt="The Long-Nosed Monkey.">
+</center>
+
+
+<a name="image-19"><!-- Image 19 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/086.png" width="300" height="539"
+alt="Who Can Consider That Nose Seriously?">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+But one step further is required for the evolution of what we may call
+the human nose, and that is a solid foundation, a ridge of bone
+connecting it with the brow and separating the eyes from each other. I
+believe that the completeness of this is a fair index of the comparative
+advancement of different races of men. In the Greek ideal of a perfect
+face the profile forms a straight line from the top of the forehead to
+the tip of the nose. This is the type of face which painters have
+delighted to give to the Virgin Mary; and, when looking at their
+Madonnas, one cannot help wondering whether they forgot that Mary was a
+Jewess. According to the Hebrew ideal, a perfect nose was like "the
+tower of Lebanon which looketh toward Damascus" (Song of Solomon, vii.
+4); but not even the ruins of that tower remain to help us to-day. The
+Romans, no doubt, accepted the ideal of the Greeks aesthetically, but
+their destiny had given them a very different nose, and they ruled the
+world.
+</p>
+<p>
+Here is the nose of Julius Caesar as a coin has preserved it for us. I
+think that the outline is too straight for a typical Roman, but the deep
+dip under the brow and the downward point are characteristic. Now
+compare the nose of another race which rules an empire greater than that
+of the Caesars. Here is John Bull as <i>Punch</i> usually represents him. It
+belongs to the same genus as that of the Roman. The reason why this
+should be the nose of command is not easy to give with scientific
+precision, for we are dealing with the play of very subtle influences,
+so the man without imagination will no doubt scoff. But I will take
+shelter under Darwin. Dealing with the expression of pride he says, "A
+proud man exhibits his sense of superiority by holding his head and body
+erect. He is haughty <i>(haut),</i> or high, and makes himself appear as
+large as possible." Again, "The arrogant man looks down on others"; and
+yet again, "In some photographs of patients affected by a monomania of
+pride, sent me by Dr. Crichton-Browne, the head and body were held erect
+and the mouth firmly closed. This latter action, expressive of decision,
+follows, I presume, from the proud man feeling perfect self-confidence
+in himself."
+</p>
+<p>
+Darwin says nothing about the nose, but I believe that, by physiological
+sympathy, it cannot but take part in the habitual downward look upon
+inferior beings. Darwin goes on to say that, "The whole expression of
+pride stands in direct antithesis to that of humility"; from which it
+follows, if my philosophy is sound, that the nose of Uriah Heep was
+turned upwards.
+</p>
+<p>
+Of course, many emotions may share in the moulding of a nose, and the
+whole subject is too intricate and vast to be treated briefly. I have
+only given a few examples to illustrate my argument, and my conclusion
+is that the key to the peculiar significance and personal quality of the
+nose is to be found in its <i>immobility</i>. The eyes and lips are
+incessantly in motion, we can twitch and wrinkle the cheeks and
+forehead, and muscles to move the ears are there, though most men have
+lost control of them. But the nose stands out like some bold promontory
+on a level coast, or like the Sphinx in the Egyptian desert, with an
+ancient history, no doubt, and a mystery perhaps, but without response
+to any appeal. And for this very reason it is an index, not to that
+which is transient in the man, but to that which is permanent. He may
+knit his brows to seem thoughtful and profound, or compress his lips to
+persuade his friends and himself that he has a strong will, but he can
+play no trick with his nose. There it stands, an incorruptible witness,
+testifying to what he is, and not only to what he is, but to the rock
+whence he was hewn and to the pit whence he was digged. For his nose is
+a bequest from his ancestors, an entailed estate which he cannot
+alienate.
+</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<a name="RULE4_51"><!-- RULE4 5 --></a>
+<h2>
+ V
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+EARS
+</center>
+<p>
+Men and women have ears, and so have jugs and pitchers. In the latter
+case they are useful: jugs and pitchers are lifted by them. And what is
+useful is fit, and fitness is the first condition of beauty. But human
+ears are put to no use, except sometimes when naughty little boys are
+lifted by them in the way of discipline; and I can see no beauty in
+them. It is only because they are so common that we do not notice how
+ridiculous they are. In the days of Charles I. men sometimes had their
+ears cut off for holding wrong opinions, which would have made them
+famous and popular in these enlightened days, but at that time it made
+all right-thinking people despise them, so the fashion of going without
+ears did not spread among us. If it had, then how differently we should
+all think of the matter now! If we were all accustomed to neat, round
+heads at drawing-rooms, levees and balls, how repulsive it Would be to
+see a well-dressed man with two ridiculous, wrinkled appendages sticking
+out from the sides of his face!
+</p>
+<p>
+In saying this I am not drawing on my fancy, but on my memory. I can
+recollect the time when no gentleman, still less any lady, would have
+owned a terrier with its ears on. And why go back so far? The same
+sentiment is prevalent in good society with respect to men's beards in
+this year of grace and smooth faces. Yet, if one chance to be looking at
+a Rembrandt instead of at society, what an infinitely handsomer adjunct
+to a noble face is a fine beard than a pair of ears!
+</p>
+<p>
+When woman first looked at her face in a polished saucepan, she was at
+once struck with the comicality of those things, and bethought herself
+what to do with them. She decided to use them for pegs to hang ornaments
+on. The improvement excited the admiration of her husband and the envy
+of her rivals to such a degree that all other women of taste in her
+tribe did the same, and from that day to this, in almost every country
+in the world, it has been accounted a shame for any respectable woman to
+show her face in public in the hideousness of naked ears. This discovery
+of its capabilities gave a new value to the ear, and a large, roomy one
+became an asset in the marriage market. I have seen a pretty little
+damsel of Sind with fourteen jingling silver things hanging at regular
+intervals from the outside edge of each ear. If Nature had been
+niggardly, the lobe at least could be enlarged by boring it and
+thrusting in a small wooden peg, then a larger one, and so on until it
+could hold an ivory wheel as large as a quoit, and hung down to the
+shoulders.
+</p>
+<p>
+But Nature surely did not intend the ear for this purpose. Then what
+did she intend? A popular error is that the ears are given to hear with,
+but the ears cannot hear. The hearing is done by a box of assorted
+instruments (<i>malleus, incus, stapes</i>, etc.) hidden in a burrow which
+has its entrance inside of the ear. If you argue that the ears are
+intended to catch sounds and direct them down to the hearing instrument,
+then explain their absurd shape. They are useless. A man who wants to
+hear distinctly puts his hand to his ear. And why do they not turn to
+meet the sounds that come from different quarters? They are absolutely
+immovable, and therefore also expressionless. A savage expresses his
+mind with all the rest of his face; he smiles and grins and pouts and
+frowns, but his ears stand like gravestones with the inscriptions
+effaced. How different is the case when you turn from man to the
+"irrational" animals! The eyes of a fawn are lustrous and beautiful, but
+they would be as meaningless as polished stones without the eloquent
+ears that stand behind them and tell her thoughts. Curiosity, suspicion,
+alarm, anger, submission, friendliness, every emotion that flits across
+her quick, sensitive mind speaks through them. They are in touch with
+her soul, and half the music of her life is played on them. And if you
+abstract yourself from individuals and look at that thing, the ear, in
+the wide field of life, what a great, living reality it is!&mdash;a spiritual
+unity under infinite diversity of material form and fashion. It is like
+the telegraph wire overhead, the commonest and plainest of material
+things, but charged with the silent and invisible currents of the life
+of the world.
+</p>
+<p>
+"Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore."
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-20"><!-- Image 20 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/092.png" width="450" height="467"
+alt="Or Perhaps when It Wants to Listen It Raises a Flipper to Its Ear.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+Birds have no ears, nor have crocodiles, nor frogs, nor snakes. Ears
+seem to be for beasts only. And not for all beasts. Seals are divided by
+naturalists into two great families&mdash;those with ears, and those without.
+The common seal belongs to the latter class, and the sea-lion to the
+former. A common seal lives in the sea, and when it does wriggle up on
+the beach of an iceberg there is nothing to hear, I suppose, or perhaps
+when it wants to listen it raises a flipper to its ear. I never saw one
+doing so, but we do not see everything that happens in the world. The
+sea-lion, with its stouter limbs, can lift its forepart, raise its head
+and look about it, and even flop about the ice-fields at a respectable
+rate. And there is no doubt that one of these is as much above an
+earless seal as fifty years of Europe are better than a cycle of Cathay.
+When performing seals are exhibited at a circus sitting on chairs,
+catching balls on the points of their noses and playing diabolo with
+them, or balancing billiard cues on their snouts, and doing other
+miraculous things, they are always sea-lions, not common seals. Of
+course, I do not mean to insinuate that sea-lions invented the ear and
+stuck it on: that would be unscientific; but I mean that their general
+intelligence and interest in affairs created that demand for more
+distinct hearing which led to the development of an ear trumpet. This
+view is wholly scientific, though pedants may quarrel with my way of
+putting it.
+</p>
+<p>
+The sea-lion's ears are very minute, mere apologies one might think; but
+don't be hasty. The finny prey of the sea-lion makes no sound as it
+skims through the water; and perhaps the padded foot of that stealthy
+garrotter, the Polar bear, makes as little on the smooth ice; for
+catching the one and not being caught by the other the sea-lion must
+trust to the keenness of its great goggle eyes. But it is a social
+beast, and it wants to catch the bellowing of its fellows far across
+the foggy waste of ice-floes; and that little leather scoop standing
+behind the ear-hole seems to be just the instrument required to catch
+and send down those sounds which would otherwise glance off the glossy
+fur and never find entrance to the tiny orifice at all. If it were any
+larger than is absolutely necessary it would be a serious impediment to
+a professional diver and swimmer like the sea-lion. This is the reason
+why otters have very small ears, and why whales and porpoises have none
+at all.
+</p>
+<p>
+But when a beast lives on land the conditions are all altered, and then
+the ear blossoms out into an infinite variety of forms and sizes, from
+each of which the true naturalist may divine the manner of life of its
+wearer as surely as the palmist tells your past, present and future from
+the lines on your hand. First, he will divide all beasts into those that
+pursue and those that flee, oppressors and oppressed. The former point
+their ears forwards, but the latter backwards. There may be a good deal
+of free play in both cases, but I am thinking of the habitual position.
+When a cat is making its felonious way along the garden wall, wrapped in
+thoughts of blackbirds and thrushes, its ears look straight forwards,
+and this is the way in which a cat's portrait is always taken, because
+it is characteristic, It cannot turn them round to catch sounds from
+behind, and would scorn to do so; when accosted from behind, it turns
+its head and looks danger in the face. It can fold them down backwards
+when the danger is a terrier and the decks are cleared for action, but
+that is another story. Contrast Brer Rabbit as he comes "lopin' up de
+big road," His ears are turning every way scouting for danger, not
+always in unison, but independently; but when he is at rest they are set
+to alarm from the flank and rear.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-21"><!-- Image 21 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/095.png" width="300" height="497"
+alt="'Tear out the House Like the Dogs Wuz atter Him.'">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+But when he "tear out the house like the dogs wuz atter him," then they
+point straight back. He was made to be eaten, and he knows it. So it is
+with the whole tribe of deer, and even with the horse, pampered and
+cared for and unacquainted with danger; his ears are a weathercock
+registering the drift of all his petty hopes and fears. I see the left
+ear go forward and prepare for a desperate shy at that wheelbarrow. He
+knows a wheelbarrow familiarly&mdash;there is one in his stall all day&mdash;but I
+am taking him a road he does not want to go, and so the hypocrite is
+going to pretend that barrow is of a dangerous sort. I prepare to apply
+a counter-irritant: he sees it with the corner of his eye, and both ears
+turn back like a tuning-fork.
+</p>
+<p>
+The size and quality of the ear serve to show how far the owner depends
+on it. You will never begin to understand Nature until you see clearly
+that every life is dominated by two supreme anxieties which push aside
+all other concerns&mdash;viz., to eat, and not to be eaten. The one is
+uppermost in those that pursue, and the other in those that flee. Now if
+the pursuer fails he loses a dinner, but if the fugitive fails he loses
+his life, from which it follows that the very best sort of ears will be
+found among those beasts that do not ravage but run.
+</p>
+<p>
+But there is another matter to be taken into account. The ears are not
+the whole of the beast's outfit. It has eyes, and it has a nose. Which
+of the three it most relies on depends upon the manner of its life. A
+bird lives in trees or the air, looking down at the prowling cat or up
+at the hawk hovering in the clear sky; so it does not keep ears, and its
+nose is of no account. But what four-footed thing can see like a bird?
+The squirrel also lives in the trees, and its ears are frivolously
+decorated with tufts of hair. You will not find many beasts that can
+afford to prostitute their ears to ornamental purposes. The only other
+beast that I can think of at this moment which has tufted ears is the
+lynx. Now the lynx is a tree cat, and there is proverbial wisdom in the
+saying "Eyes like a lynx."
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-22"><!-- Image 22 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/097.png" width="600" height="728"
+alt="A Great Catholic Congress of Distinguished Ears.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+But go to the timid beasts that spend their lives on the ground among
+grass and brushwood and woods and coppices, where murderous foes are
+prowling unseen, and you will see ears indeed&mdash;expansive, tremulous,
+turning lightly on well-oiled pivots, and catching, like large
+sea-shells, the mingled murmur of rustling leaves and snapping twigs and
+chirping insects and falling seeds, and the slight, occasional, abrupt,
+fateful sound which is none of these. It is impossible, no doubt, for us
+ever to think ourselves into the life which these beasts live&mdash;moving,
+thinking and sleeping in a circumambient atmosphere of never-ceasing
+sound; sitting, as it were, at the receiving station of a system of
+wireless telegraphy, and catching cross-currents of floating
+intelligence from all quarters, mostly undiscernible by us if we
+listened for it, but which they, by long practice, instantly locate and
+interpret without conscious effort.
+</p>
+<p>
+The zoologist classifies them under many heads. The field mouse and
+rabbits are rodentia, the deer ungulata, the kangaroos marsupialia. In
+my museum they are all one family, and their labels are their ears. In
+these days of international conferences, parliaments of religion,
+pan-everything-in-turn councils, might we not arrange for a great
+catholic congress of distinguished ears? What a glow of new life it
+would shed upon our straitened, traditional ways of thinking about the
+social problems of our humble fellow-creatures! I would exclude the
+eared owls, whose ears are a mere sport of fashion, like the hideous
+imitations of birds' wings which ladies stick on their hats.
+</p>
+<p>
+But just when this peep into the rare show of Nature is lifting my soul
+into sublimity, I am brought down to the base earth again by an
+exception. This is the plague of all high science. You design a stately
+theory, collect from many quarters a wealth of facts to establish it
+with, and have arranged them with cumulative and irresistible force,
+when some disgusting, uninvited case thrusts itself in on your notice
+and refuses to fit into your argument at all. In this instance it is
+"my lord the elephant." That he has no need to concern himself about any
+bloodthirsty beast that may be lurking in the jungle is not more obvious
+than that his ears are the biggest in the world. Now there are two ways
+of getting rid of an obstruction of this kind. One is to betake yourself
+to your thinking chair and pipe and to rake up the possibilities of the
+Pleiocene and Meiocene ages, and prove that when the immense ear of the
+elephant was evolved there must have been some carnivorous monster, some
+sabre-toothed tiger or cave bear, which preyed on elephants.
+</p>
+<p>
+The other way is to get acquainted with the elephant, cultivate an
+intimacy with him, and find out what his ears are to him. I prefer the
+second way. I would patiently watch him as he stands drowsily under an
+umbrageous banian tree on a sultry day before the monsoon has burst and
+refreshed earth and air. So might I note that his ears are incessantly
+moving, but not turning this way and that to catch sounds&mdash;just
+flapping, flapping, as if to cool his great temples. So have I seen the
+gigantic fruit bats, called flying foxes in India, hanging in hundreds
+in the upper branches of a tall peepul tree at noon, feeling too hot to
+sleep, and all fanning themselves in unison with one wing&mdash;a comic
+spectacle. And at each flap of the elephant's ears I would observe that
+a cloud of flies (for the elephant is not too great to be pestered by
+the despicable hordes of beggars for blood) were dislodged from their
+feeding grounds about his head and neck, and, trying to settle about his
+rear parts, were driven back again by the swinging of his tail. Then I
+should say that ear is just a fan. How significant it is that among the
+emblems of royalty in the East the three chiefest are an
+umbrella-bearer, two men who stand behind and swing great punkahs
+modelled on the elephant's ear, and two others carrying yak's tails
+wherewith to scare the flies from the royal person! The elephant is a
+rajah!
+</p>
+<p>
+There is another mysterious ear which is a stumbling-block to the simple
+theory-monger. It is in fashion among a tribe of bats to which belongs
+the so-called vampire of India. This monster is fond of coming into your
+bedroom at midnight through the open windows, but not to suck your
+blood, for it has little in common with the true vampire of South
+America. It brings its dinner with it and hangs from the ceiling,
+"feeding like horses when you hear them feed." You hear its jaws
+working&mdash;crunch, crunch, crunch, but feel too drowsy to get up and expel
+it.
+</p>
+<p>
+When you get up in the morning there on your clean dressing table, just
+below the place where it hung, are the bloody remains of a sparrow, or
+the crumbs of a tree-frog. The servants will tell you that the sparrow
+was killed and eaten by a rat, but if you rise softly next night when
+you hear the sound of feeding, and shut the windows, you will find a
+goblin hanging from the ceiling in the morning, hideous beyond the
+power of words to tell. Its ears, thin, membranous and longer than its
+head, tremble incessantly. Inside of them is another pair, much smaller
+than the first, and tuned to their octave, I should guess, while two
+membranous smelling trumpets of similar pattern rise over the nose. What
+is the meaning of these repulsive instruments, and how does that strange
+beast catch sparrows? When it comes out after dark and quarters the
+garden, passing swiftly under and through the branches of trees, they
+are sound asleep hidden among the leaves, motionless and silent. But
+their flesh may be scented, and their gentle breathing heard if you have
+instruments sufficiently delicate. Then the ample wings may suddenly
+enfold the sleeping body, and the savage jaws grip the startled head
+before there is time even to scream. Without a doubt this is the secret
+of the vampire bat's ears.
+</p>
+<p>
+But to find food and flee death are not the only interests in life even
+to the meanest creature. There are social pleasures, family affections
+and fellowship, sympathy and co-operation in the struggles of life. And
+there is love.
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p>Omne adeo genus in terris hominumque ferarumque,</p>
+ <p>Et genus aequoreum, pecudes, pictaeque volucres,</p>
+ <p>In furias ignemque ruunt: amor omnibus idem.</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+The chirping of the cricket, the song of the lark, the call of the
+sentinel crane, the watchword with which the migratory geese keep their
+squadrons together, the howling of jackals, the lowing of cows, the hum
+of the hive, the chatter of the drawing-room, and a hundred other voices
+in forest and field and town remind us that the voice and the ear are
+the pair of wheels on which society runs.
+</p>
+<p>
+And this thought points the way out of another contradictious puzzle,
+that which confronts my argument from the ears of an ass. It roams
+treeless deserts where no foe can approach unseen. Thistles make no
+sound. Why should it be adorned with ears which in their amplitude are
+scarcely surpassed by those of the rabbit and the hare. There is no
+answer unless their function is to hear the bray of a fellow-ass.... One
+may object that that majestic sound is surely of force to impress itself
+without any aid from an external ear; but that is a vain argument built
+on the costermonger's moke&mdash;dreary exile from its fatherland. Remember
+that its ancestors wandered on the steppes of Central Asia or the
+borders of the Sahara. In those boundless solitudes, with nothing that
+eye can see or that common ear can hear to remind her that she is not
+the sole inhabitant of the universe, the wild ass "snuffeth up the wind
+in her desire," and lifting her windsails to the hot blast, hears, borne
+across miles of white sand and shimmering mirage, the joyful
+reverberations of that music which tells of old comrades and boon
+companions scouring the plain and kicking up their exultant heels.
+</p>
+<p>
+Monkeys taking to trees were like the birds, they scarcely needed ears.
+And so by the high road of evolution you arrive at man and the enigma of
+his ear. It is a shrunken and shrivelled remnant, a moss-grown ruin, a
+derelict ship. It is to a pattern ear what the old shoe which you find
+in a country lane, shed from the foot of some "unemployed," is to one of
+Waukenphast's "five-miles-an-hour-easy" boots. We ought to temper our
+contempt for what it is with respect for what it was. All the parts of
+it are there and recognisable, even to the muscles that should move it,
+but we have lost control of them. I believe anyone could regain that by
+persevering exercise of his will power for a time&mdash;that is, if he has
+any. I have a friend who, if you treat him with disrespect, shrivels you
+up with a sarcastic wag of his right ear.
+</p>
+<p>
+The ears of dogs open up another vista for the questioning philosopher.
+Their day is past, too, and man may cut them short to match his own, but
+the dog grows them longer than before. When he first took service with
+man, and grew careless and lazy, the muscles got slack and the ears
+dropped, which is in accordance with Nature. Then, instead of being
+allowed to wither away, they have been handed over to the milliner and
+shaped and trimmed in harmony with the "style" of each breed of dogs.
+How it has been done is one of those mysteries which will not open to
+the iron keys of Darwin, But there it is for those to see who have eyes.
+</p>
+
+<a name="image-23"><!-- Image 23 --></a>
+<center>
+<img src="./images/104.png" width="300" height="389"
+alt="The Curls of a Mother's Darling.">
+</center>
+
+<p>
+The ears of the little dogs bred for ladies' laps are the curls of a
+mother's darling; the pendant love-locks of the old, old maid who,
+despite of changeful fashions, clings to those memorials of the pensive
+beauty of her youth, are repeated in solemn mimicry by the dachshund
+trotting at her heels; but the sensible fur cap of the dignified
+Newfoundland reminds us of the cold regions from which his forefathers
+came. Some kinds of terriers still have their ears starched up to look
+perky, and I have occasionally seen a dog with one ear up and the other
+down as if straining after the elusive idea expressed in the
+Baden-Powell hat. All which shows that "one touch of nature makes the
+whole world kin."
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_6"><!-- RULE4 6 --></a>
+<h2>
+ VI
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+TOMMY
+</center>
+<center>
+THE STORY OF AN OWL
+</center>
+<p>
+Among the many and various strangers within my gates who have helped to
+enliven the days of my exile, Tommy was one towards whom I still feel a
+certain sense of obligation because he taught me for the first time what
+an owl is. For Tommy was an owl. From any dictionary you may ascertain
+that an owl is a nocturnal, carnivorous bird, of a short, stout form,
+with downy feathers and a large head; and if that does not satisfy you,
+there is no lack of books which will furnish fuller and more precise
+descriptions.
+</p>
+<p>
+But descriptions cannot impart acquaintance. I had sought acquaintance
+and had gained some knowledge such as books cannot supply, not only of
+owls in general, but of that particular species of owls to which Tommy
+belonged, who, in the heraldry of ornithology, was <i>Carine brahma</i>, an
+Indian spotted owlet. This branch of the ancient family of owls has
+always been eccentric. It does not mope and to the moon complain. It
+flouts the moon and the sun and everyone who passes by, showing its
+round face at its door and even coming out, at odd times of the day, to
+stare and bob and play the clown. It does not cry "Tuwhoo, Tuwhoo," as
+the poets would have it, but laughs, jabbers, squeaks and chants
+clamorous duets with its spouse.
+</p>
+<p>
+All this I knew. I had also gathered from his public appearances that a
+spotted owlet is happy in his domestic life and that he is fond of fat
+white ants, for, when their winged swarms were flying, I had seen him
+making short flights from his perch in a tree and catching them with his
+feet; and I believed that he fed in secret on mice and lizards. But all
+that did not amount to understanding an owl, as I discovered when Tommy
+became a member of our chummery.
+</p>
+<p>
+Tommy was born in "the second city of the British Empire," to wit,
+Bombay, in the month of March, 1901. His birthplace was a hole in an old
+"Coral" tree. Domestic life in that hole was not conducted with
+regularity. Meals were at uncertain hours and uncertain also in their
+quantity and quality. The parents were hunters and were absent for long
+periods, and though there was incredible shouting and laughter when they
+returned, they came at such irregular times that we did not suspect that
+they were permanent residents and had a family. One night, however,
+Tommy, being precocious and, as we discovered afterwards, keen on seeing
+life, took advantage of parental absence to clamber to the entrance of
+the nursery and, losing his balance, toppled over into the garden. He
+kept cool, however, and tried to conceal himself, but Hurree the malee,
+watering the plants early in the morning, spied him lying with his face
+on the earth and brought him to us.
+</p>
+<p>
+He seemed dead, but he was very much alive, as appeared when he was made
+to sit up and turned those wonderful eyes of his upon us. He was a droll
+little object at that time, nearly globular in form and covered with
+down, like a toy for children to play with. His head turned like a
+revolving lighthouse and flared those eyes upon you wherever you went,
+great luminous orbs, black-centred and gold-ringed and full of silent
+wonder, or, I should rather say, surprise. This never left him. To the
+last everything that presented itself to his gaze, though he had seen it
+a hundred times, seemed to fill him with fresh surprise. Nothing ever
+became familiar. What an enviable cast of mind! It must make the
+brightness of childhood perennial.
+</p>
+<p>
+There was some discussion as to how Tommy should be fed, and we finally
+decided that one should try to open the small hooked beak, whose point
+could just be detected protruding from a nest of fluff, while another
+held a piece of raw meat ready to pop in. It did not look an easy job,
+but we had scarcely set about it when Tommy himself solved the
+difficulty by plucking the meat out of our fingers and swallowing it.
+This early intimation that, however absent he might look, he was "all
+there" was never belied, and there was no further difficulty about the
+feeding of him. When he saw us coming he always fell into the same
+ridiculous attitude, with his face in the dust, but we just picked him
+up and stood him on his proper end and showed him the meat and his
+bashfulness vanished at once.
+</p>
+<p>
+After sunset he would get lively and begin calling for his mother in a
+strange husky voice. At this time we would let him out in the garden,
+watching him closely, for, if he thought he was alone, he would sneak
+away slyly, then make a run for liberty, hobbling along at a good rate
+with the aid of his wings, though he never attempted to fly as yet. When
+detected and overtaken, he fell on his face as before. One memorable day
+he found a hole in a stone wall and, before we could stop him, he was
+in. The hole was too small to admit a hand, though not a rat or a snake,
+so the prospect was gloomy. Suddenly a happy inspiration came to me.
+That sad, husky cry with which he expressed his need of a mother was not
+difficult to mimic, and he might be cheated into thinking that a lost
+brother or sister was looking for him. I retired and made the attempt,
+and, hark! a faint echo came from the wall. At each repetition it became
+clearer, until the round face and great eyes appeared at the mouth of
+the hole. Then the round body tumbled out, and little Tommy was hobbling
+about, looking, with pathetic eagerness, for "the old familiar faces."
+When he discovered how he had been betrayed, his face went down and he
+suffered himself to be carried quietly to the canary's cage in which he
+was kept.
+</p>
+<p>
+It seemed to be time now to begin Tommy's education, for I judged that,
+if he had been at home, he would ere then have been getting nightly
+lessons in the poacher's art. So I procured a small gecko, one of those
+grey house lizards, with pellets at the ends of their toes, which come
+down from the roof after the lamps are lit and gorge themselves on the
+foolish moths and plant bugs that come to the light. Securing it with a
+thin cord tied round its waist, I introduced it into Tommy's cage. He
+looked surprised, very much surprised. He raised himself to his full
+height. He gazed at it. He curtseyed. He gave a little jump and was
+standing with both feet on the lizard. A moment more and the lizard was
+gliding down his throat with my thin cord after it. Mr. Seton Thompson
+would have us believe that all young things are laboriously trained by
+their parents, just like human children, and if he was an eye-witness of
+all the scenes that he describes so vividly, it must be so with other
+young things. But he did not know Tommy, who is the bird of Minerva and
+evidently sprang into being, like his patron goddess, with all his
+armour on.
+</p>
+<p>
+After a time, when he had exchanged his infant down for a suit of
+feathers, he was promoted to a large cage out in the garden, and his
+regular diet was a little raw meat or a mutton bone tied to one of his
+perches, but, by way of a treat, I would offer him, whenever I could get
+it, a locust, or large grasshopper. His way of accepting this was unique
+and pretty. He would look surprised, stare, curtsey once or twice, stare
+again and then, suddenly, noiselessly and as lightly as a fairy, flit
+across the cage and, without alighting, pluck the insect from my fingers
+with both his feet and return to his perch.
+</p>
+<p>
+Why he bowed to his food and to everybody and everything that presented
+itself before him was a riddle that I never solved. A materialistic
+friend suggested that he was adjusting the focus of his wonderful eyes,
+and the action was certainly like that of an optician examining a lens;
+but I feel that there was something more ceremonial about it. This
+punctiliousness cost him his dinner once. I was curious to know what he
+would do with a mouse, so, having caught one alive, I slipped it quietly
+into his cage. He was more surprised than ever before, raised himself
+erect, bowed to the earth once, twice and three times, stared, bowed
+again and so on until, to his evident astonishment and chagrin, the
+mouse found an opening and was gone. The lesson was not lost. A few days
+later I got another mouse, to which he began to do obeisance as before,
+but very soon and suddenly, though as softly as falling snow, he plumped
+upon it with both feet and, spreading his wings on the ground, looked
+all round him with infinite satisfaction. The mouse squeaked, but he
+stopped that by cracking its skull quietly with his beak. Then he
+gathered himself up and flew to the perch with his prize.
+</p>
+<p>
+One thing I noted about Tommy most emphatically. He never showed a sign
+of affection, or what is called attachment. He maintained a strictly
+bowing acquaintance with me. He was not afraid, but he would suffer no
+familiarity. He would come and eat, with due ceremony, out of my hand,
+but if I offered to touch him he was surprised and affronted and went
+off at once. When I moved to another house I found that I could not
+continue to keep him, so I sent him to the zoological garden, where I
+visited him sometimes, but he never vouchsafed a token of recognition.
+His heart was locked except to his own kin.
+</p>
+<p>
+But since that time, when I have seen an owl, even a barn owl, or a
+great horned owl, swiftly cross the sky in the darkness of night, I have
+felt that I could accompany it, in imagination, on its secret quest. It
+will arrive silently, like the angel of death, in a tree overlooking a
+field in which a rat, whose hour has come, is furtively feeding, all
+alert and tremulous, but unaware of any impending danger. The rat will
+go on feeding, unconscious of the mocking curtsey and the baleful eyes
+that follow with mute attention its every motion, until the hand of the
+clock has moved to the point assigned by fate, and then it will feel
+eight sharp talons plunged into its flesh. I have seen the fierce dash
+of the sparrow hawk into a crowd of unsuspecting sparrows, I know the
+triumph of the falcon as it rises for the final, fatal swoop on the
+flying duck, and I have watched the kestrel, high in air, scanning the
+field for some rash mouse or lizard that has wandered too far from
+shelter. The owl is also a bird of prey, but its idea is different from
+all these.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_7"><!-- RULE4 7 --></a>
+<h2>
+ VII
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+THE BARN OWL
+</center>
+<center>
+A FRIEND OF MAN
+</center>
+<p>
+A thunderstorm has burst on the common rat. Its complicity in the spread
+of the plague, which has been proved up to the hilt, has filled the cup
+of its iniquities to overflowing, and we have awakened to the fact that
+it is and always has been an arch-enemy of mankind. Simultaneously, in
+widely separated parts of the world, a "pogrom" has been proclaimed, and
+the accounts of the massacre which come to us from great cities like
+Calcutta and Bombay are appalling and almost incredible. They would move
+to pity the most callous heart, if pity could be associated with the
+rat. But it cannot.
+</p>
+<p>
+The wild rat deserves that humane consideration to which all our natural
+fellow-creatures on this earth are entitled; but the domestic rat (I use
+this term advisedly, for though man has not domesticated it, it has
+thoroughly domesticated itself) cannot justify its existence. It is a
+fungus of civilisation. If it confined itself to its natural food, the
+farmer's grain, the tax which it levies on the country would still be
+such as no free people ought to endure. But it confines itself to
+nothing. As Waterton says: "After dining on carrion in the filthiest
+sink, it will often manage to sup on the choicest dainties of the
+larder, where like Celoeno of old <i>vestigia foeda relinquit</i>." It kills
+chickens, plunders the nests of little birds, devouring mother, eggs and
+young, murders and feeds on its brothers and sisters and even its own
+offspring, and not infrequently tastes even man when it finds him
+asleep. The bite of a rat is sometimes very poisonous, and I have had to
+give three months' sick leave to a clerk who had been bitten by one. Add
+to this that the rat multiplies at a rate which is simply criminal,
+rearing a family of perhaps a dozen every two or three months, and no
+further argument is needed to justify the war which has been declared
+against it. Every engine of war will, no doubt, be brought into use,
+traps of many kinds, poisons, cats, the professional rat-catcher, and a
+rat bacillus which, if once it gets a footing, is expected to originate
+a fearful epidemic.
+</p>
+<p>
+But I need not linger any more among rats, which are not my subject. I
+am writing in the hope that this may be an opportune time to put in a
+plea for a much persecuted native of this and many other countries,
+whose principal function in the economy of nature is to kill rats and
+mice. The barn, or screech, owl, which is found over a great part of
+Europe and Asia and also in America, was once very common in Britain,
+inhabiting every "ivy-mantled tower," church steeple, barn loft, hollow
+tree, or dovecot, in which it could get a lodging. But it was never
+welcome. Like the Jews in the days of King John it has been relentlessly
+persecuted by superstition, ignorance and avarice. Avarice, instigated
+by ladies and milliners, has looked with covetous eye on its downy and
+beautiful plumes; while ignorance and superstition have feared and hated
+the owl in all countries and all ages. In ancient Rome it was a bird of
+evil omen.
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p>Foedaque fit volucris venturi nuncia luctus,</p>
+ <p>Ignavus bubo, dirum mortalibus omen.</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+In India, to-day, if an owl sits on the house-top, the occupants dare
+scarcely lie down to sleep, for they know that the devil is walking the
+rooms and marking someone for death. Lady Macbeth, when about the murder
+of Duncan, starts and whispers,
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p>Hark! Peace! It was the owl that shrieked,</p>
+ <p>The fatal bellman.</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+And even as late as the nineteenth century, Waterton's aged housekeeper
+"knew full well what sorrow it had brought into other houses when she
+was a young woman," Witches, like modern ladies of fashion, set great
+value on its wings. The latter stick them on their hats, the witches in
+Macbeth threw them into their boiling cauldron. Horace's Canidia could
+not complete her recipe without
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p> "Plumamque nocturnae strigis."</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+We may suppose that in Britain these superstitions are gone for ever,
+killed and buried by board schools and compulsory education. If they are
+(there is room for an <i>if</i>) they have been succeeded by a worse, the
+superstition of gamekeepers and farmers. It is worse in effect, because
+these men have guns, which their predecessors had not. And it is more
+wicked, because it is founded on an ignorance for which there is no
+excuse. How little harm the barn owl is likely to do game may be
+inferred from the fact that, when it makes its lodging in a dovecot, the
+pigeons suffer no concern! Waterton (and no better authority could be
+quoted) scouts the idea, common among farmers, that its business there
+is to eat the pigeons' eggs. "They lay the saddle," he says, "on the
+wrong horse. They ought to put it on the rat." His predecessor in the
+estate had allowed the owls to be destroyed and the rats to multiply,
+and there were few young pigeons in the dovecot. Waterton took strong
+measures to exterminate the rats, but built breeding places for the
+owls, and the dovecot, which they constantly frequented, became prolific
+again.
+</p>
+<p>
+But granting that the owls did twice the injury to game with which they
+are credited, it would be repaid many times over by their services.
+Waterton well says that, if we knew its utility in thinning the country
+of mice, it would be with us what the ibis was with the Egyptians&mdash;a
+sacred bird. He examined the pellets ejected by a pair of owls that
+occupied a ruined gateway on the estate. Every pellet contained
+skeletons of from four to seven mice. Owls, it may be necessary to
+explain, swallow their food without separating flesh from bone, skin and
+hair, and afterwards disgorge the indigestible portions rolled up into
+little balls. In sixteen months the pair of owls above-mentioned had
+accumulated a deposit of more than a bushel of these pellets, each a
+funeral urn of from four to seven mice! In the old Portuguese fort of
+Bassein in Western India I noticed that the earth at the foot of a
+ruined tower was plentifully mixed with small skulls, jaws and other
+bones. Taking home a handful and examining them, I found that they were
+the remains of rats, mice and muskrats.
+</p>
+<p>
+The owl kills small birds, large insects, frogs and even fishes, but
+these are extras: its profession is rat-catching and mousing, and only
+those who have a very intimate personal acquaintance with it know how
+peculiarly its equipment and methods are adapted to this work. The
+falcon gives open chase to the wild duck, keeping above it if possible
+until near enough for a last spurt; then it comes down at a speed which
+is terrific, and, striking the duck from above, dashes it to the ground.
+The sparrow hawk plunges unexpectedly into a group of little birds and
+nips up one with a long outstretched foot before they have time to get
+clear of each other. The harrier skims over field, copse and meadow,
+suddenly rounding corners and topping fences and surprising small
+birds, or mice, on which it drops before they have recovered from their
+surprise.
+</p>
+<p>
+The owl does none of these things. For one thing, it hunts in the night,
+when its sight is keenest and rats are abroad feeding. Its flight is
+almost noiseless and yet marvellously light and rapid when it pleases.
+Sailing over field, lane and hedgerow and examining the ground as it
+goes, it finds a likely place and takes a post of observation on a fence
+perhaps, or a sheaf of corn. Here it sits, bolt upright, all eyes. It
+sees a rat emerge from the grass and advance slowly, as it feeds, into
+open ground. There is no hurry, for the doom of that rat is already
+fixed. So the owl just sits and watches till the right moment has
+arrived; then it flits swiftly, softly, silently, across the intervening
+space and drops like a flake of snow. Without warning, or suspicion of
+danger, the rat feels eight sharp claws buried in its flesh. It protests
+with frantic squeals, but these are stopped with a nip that crunches its
+skull, and the owl is away with it to the old tower, where the hungry
+children are calling, with weird, impatient hisses, for something to
+eat.
+</p>
+<p>
+The owl does not hunt the fields and hedgerows only. It goes to all
+places where rats or mice may be, reconnoitres farmyards, barns and
+dwelling houses and boldly enters open windows. Sometimes it hovers in
+the air, like a kestrel, scanning the ground below. And though its
+regular hunting hours are from dusk till dawn, it has been seen at work
+as late as nine or ten on a bright summer morning. But the vulgar boys
+of bird society are fond of mobbing it when it appears abroad by day,
+and it dislikes publicity.
+</p>
+<p>
+The barn owl lays its eggs in the places which it inhabits. There is
+usually a thick bed of pellets on the floor, and it considers no other
+nest needful. The eggs are said to be laid in pairs. There may be two,
+four, or six, of different eggs, in the nest, and perhaps a young one,
+or two, at the same time. Eggs are found from April, or even March, till
+June or July, and there is, sometimes at any rate, a second brood as
+late as November or December. This owl does not hoot, but screeches. A
+weird and ghostly voice it is, from which, according to Ovid, the bird
+has its Latin name, Strix (pronounced "Streex," probably, at that time).
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p>Est illis strigibus nomen, sed nominis hujus.</p>
+ <p>Causa, quod horrenda stridere nocte silent.</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+It is a sound which, coming suddenly out of the darkness, might well
+start fears and forebodings in the dark and guilty mind of untutored
+man, which would not be dispelled by a nearer view of the strange object
+from which they proceeded. White, ghostly, upright, spindle-shaped and
+biggest at the top, where two great orbs flare, like fiery bull's-eyes,
+from the centres of two round white targets, it stands solemn and
+speechless; you approach nearer and it falls into fearsome pantomimic
+attitudes and grimaces, like a clown trying to frighten a child. And now
+a new horror has been added to the barn owl. The numerous letters which
+appeared in <i>The Times</i> and were summarised, with comments, by Sir T.
+Digby Pigott, C.B., in <i>The Contemporary Review</i> of July 1908, leave no
+reasonable room for doubt that this bird sometimes becomes brightly
+luminous, and is the will-o'-the-wisp for believing in which we are
+deriding our forefathers. All things considered, I cannot withhold my
+sympathy and some respect for the superstition of aged housekeepers,
+Romans and Indians. For that of gamekeepers and farmers I have neither.
+All our new schemes of "Nature study" will surely deserve the reproach
+of futility if, in the next generation, every farmhouse in England has
+not its own Owl Tower for the encouragement of this friend of man.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_8"><!-- RULE4 8 --></a>
+<h2>
+ VIII
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+DOMESTIC ANIMALS
+</center>
+<p>
+Long before Jubal became the father of all such as handle the harp and
+the organ and Tubalcain the instructor of every artificer in brass and
+iron, Abel was a keeper of sheep, but the sacred writer has not informed
+us how he first caught them and tamed them. If we consult other records
+of the infancy of the human race, they reveal as little. When the
+Egyptians began to portray their daily life on stone 6,000 or 7,000
+years ago, they already had cattle and sheep, geese and ducks and dogs
+and plenty of asses, though not horses. They got these from the
+Assyrians, who had used them in their chariots long before they began to
+record anything.
+</p>
+<p>
+Further back than this we have no one to question except those shadowy
+men of the Stone Age who have left us heaps of their implements, but
+none of their bones. They were not so careful of the bones of horses,
+which lie in thousands about the precincts of their untidy villages, but
+not a scrawl on a bit of a mammoth tusk has been found to indicate
+whether these were ridden and driven, or only hunted and eaten.
+</p>
+<p>
+Why should it be recorded that Cadmus invented letters? Why should we
+inquire who first made gunpowder and glass? Why should every schoolboy
+be taught that Watt was the inventor of the steam engine? Can any of
+these be put in the scale, as benefactors of our race, with the man who
+first trained a horse to carry him on its back, or drew milk with his
+hands from the udders of a cow? The familiarity of the thing has made us
+callous to the wonder of it. Let us put it before us, like a painting or
+a statue, and have a good look at it.
+</p>
+<p>
+There is a farmhouse, any common farmhouse, just one of the molecules
+that constitute the mass of our wholesome country life. A horse is being
+harnessed for the plough: its ancestors sniffed the wind on the steppes
+of Tartary. Meek cows are standing to be milked: when primitive man
+first knew them in their native forests he used to give them a wide
+berth, for his flint arrows fell harmless off their tough hides, and
+they were fierce exceedingly. A cock is crowing on the fence as if the
+whole farm belonged to himself: he ought to be skulking in an Indian
+jungle. The sheep have no business here; their place is on the rocky
+mountains of Asia. As for the dog, it is difficult to assign it a
+country, for it owns no wild kindred in any part of the world, but it
+ought at least to be worrying the sheep. If there is an ass, it is a
+native of Abyssinia, and the Turkeys are Americans. The cat derives its
+descent from an Egyptian.
+</p>
+<p>
+But all these are of one country now and of one religion. They know no
+home nor desire any, except the farmhouse, in which they were born and
+bred, and the lord of it is their lord, to whom they look for food and
+protection. And what would he do without them? What should we do without
+them? It is impossible to conceive that life could be carried on if we
+were deprived of these obedient and uncomplaining servants. High
+civilisation has been attained without steam engines; education, as we
+use the term now, is superfluous&mdash;Runjeet Singh, the Lion of the Punjab,
+could neither read nor write; the human race has prospered and
+multiplied without the knowledge of iron; but we know of no time when
+man did without domestic animals.
+</p>
+<p>
+It is vain to speculate how the thing first came about, whether the
+sportive anthropoid ape took to riding on a wild goat before he emerged
+as a man keeping flocks, or whether some great pioneer, destined to be
+worshipped in after ages as a demigod, showed his fellows how the wild
+calves, if taken young, might be trained into tractable slaves; and it
+is hopeless to expect that any record will now leap to light which will
+give us knowledge in place of speculation. But it might not be
+unprofitable to seek for some clue to the strange selection which the
+domesticating genius of man has made from among the multifarious
+material presented to it by the animal kingdom. If we do so we shall
+almost be forced to the conclusion that domesticability is a character,
+or quality, inherent in some animals and entirely wanting in others.
+</p>
+<p>
+Let us begin with pigeons, a very large group, but one that shows more
+unity than any of the other Orders into which naturalists divide birds.
+It embraces turtle doves of many species, wood pigeons, ground pigeons,
+fruit pigeons and some strange forms like the great crowned pigeon of
+Victoria. Of all these only one, the common blue rock, has been
+domesticated. The ring dove of Asia has been kept as a cage bird for so
+long that a permanent albino and also a fawn-coloured variety have been
+established and are more common in aviaries than birds of the natural
+colour; but the ring dove has not become a domestic fowl, and never
+will. In this instance there is a plausible explanation, for the blue
+rock, unlike the rest of the tribe, nests and roosts in holes and is
+also gregarious; therefore, if provided with accommodation of the kind
+it requires, it will form a permanent settlement and remain with us on
+the same terms as the honey bee; while the ring dove, not caring for a
+fixed home, must be confined, however tame it may become, or it will
+wander and be lost.
+</p>
+<p>
+But this explanation will not fit other cases. What a multitude of wild
+ducks there are in Scotland and every other country, mallards, pintails,
+gadwalls, widgeons, pochards and teals, all very much alike in their
+habits and tastes! But of them all only one species, and that a
+migratory one, the mallard, has been persuaded to abandon its wandering
+ways and settle down to a life of ease and obesity as a dependant of
+man. In India there is a duck of the same genus as the mallard, known as
+the spotted-billed duck (<i>Anas poecilorhynchus</i>), which is as large as
+the mallard and quite as tasty, and is, moreover, not migratory, but
+remains and breeds in the country. But it has not been domesticated: the
+tame ducks in India, as here, are all mallards. The muscovy duck is a
+distinct species which has been domesticated elsewhere and introduced.
+</p>
+<p>
+From the ducks let us turn to the hens. The partridge, grouse and
+pheasant are all dainty birds, but if we desire to eat them we must
+shoot them, or (<i>proh pudor!</i>) snare them. Plover's eggs are worth four
+shillings a dozen, but we must seek them on the moors. The birds that
+have covenanted to accept our food and protection and lay their eggs for
+our use and rear their young for us to kill are descended from <i>Gallus
+bankivus</i>, the jungle fowl of Eastern India. How they came here history
+records not: perhaps the gipsies brought them. They appear now in
+strange and diverse guise, the ponderous and feather-legged
+Cochin-China, the clean-limbed and wiry game, the crested Houdan, the
+Minorca with its monstrous comb, and the puny bantam. In Japan there is
+a breed that carries a tail seven or eight feet in length, which has to
+be "done" regularly like a lady's hair, to keep it from dirt and damage.
+</p>
+<p>
+But however their outward aspects may differ, they are of the same
+blood and know it. A featherweight bantam cock will stand up to an
+elephantine brahma and fight him according to the rules of the ring and
+next minute pay compliments to his lady in language which she will be at
+no loss to understand. And if the artificial conditions of their life
+were removed, they would soon all lapse alike to the image of the stock
+from which they are sprung. This is well illustrated in a show case in
+the South Kensington Museum exhibiting a group of fowls from Pitcairn's
+Island. These are descended from some stock landed by the mutinous crew
+of H.M.S. <i>Bounty</i> in 1790, which ran wild, and in a century they have
+gone back to the small size and lithe figure and almost to the game
+colour of the wild birds from which they branched off before history
+dawned.
+</p>
+<p>
+If we turn next to the Ruminants, the clean beasts which chew the cud
+and divide the hoof, the puzzle becomes harder still. Deer and antelopes
+are often kept as pets, and become so tame that they are allowed to
+wander at liberty. In Egypt herds of gazelles were so kept before the
+days of Cheops. In India I have known a black buck which regularly
+attended the station cricket ground, moving among the nervous players
+with its nose in the air and insolence in its gait, fully aware that
+eighteen-inch horns with very sharp points insured respectful treatment.
+Mr. Sterndale trained a Neilghai to go in harness. The great bovine
+antelopes of Africa would become as tame, and there is no reason to
+suppose that their beef and milk would not be as good as those of the
+cow. But no antelope or deer appears ever to have been domesticated,
+with the exception of the reindeer.
+</p>
+<p>
+Of the other ruminants the ox, buffalo, yak, goat, sheep and a few
+others are domestic animals, while the bison and the gaur, or so-called
+Indian bison, and a large number of wild goats and sheep have been
+neglected. The buffalo and yak have probably come under the yoke in
+comparatively recent times, for they are little changed; but the goat
+and still more the sheep have undergone a wonderful transformation
+within and without. Who could recognise in a Leicester ewe the wary
+denizen of precipitous mountains which will not feed until it has set a
+sentinel to give warning if danger approaches? And here is a curious
+fact which has scarcely been noticed by naturalists.
+</p>
+<p>
+The original of our goat is supposed to be the Persian ibex. At any
+rate, it was an ibex of some species, as its horns plainly show. But on
+the plains of Northern India, under ranges of hills on which the Persian
+ibex wanders wild, the common domestic goat is a very different animal
+from that of Europe, and has peculiar spiral horns of the same pattern
+as the markhor, another grand species of wild goat which draws eager
+hunters to the higher reaches of the same mountains. From this it would
+appear that two species of wild goat have been domesticated and kept to
+some extent distinct, one eventually finding its way westward, but not
+eastward and southward.
+</p>
+<p>
+The Indian humped cattle also differ so widely in form, structure and
+voice from those of Europe that there can scarcely be a doubt of their
+descent from distinct species. But both have entirely disappeared as
+wild animals, unless indeed the white cattle of Chillingham are really
+descendants of Caesar's dreadful urus and not merely domestic cattle
+lapsed into savagery. So have the camel, and, with a similar possible
+exception, the horse. Was the whole race in each of these cases
+subjugated, or exterminated, and that by uncivilised man with his
+primitive weapons? There is no analogy here with the extinction of such
+animals as the mammoth, for the ox is a beast in every way fitted to
+live and thrive in the present condition of this world, as much so as
+the buffalo and the Indian bison, which show no sign of approaching
+extinction. Our fathers easily got rid of the difficulty by assuming
+that Noah never released these species after the Flood, but what shall
+those do who cannot believe in the literality of Noah's ark?
+</p>
+<p>
+As for the dog, its domestication has been the creation of a new
+species. The material was perhaps the wolf, more likely the jackal, but
+possibly a blend of more than one species. But a dog is now a dog and
+neither a wolf nor a jackal. A mastiff, a pug, a collie, a greyhound, a
+pariah all recognise each other and observe the same rules of etiquette
+when they meet.
+</p>
+<p>
+We must admit, however, that, whatever pliability of disposition, or
+other inherent suitability, led to the first domestication of certain
+species of animals, the changes induced in their natures by many
+generations of domesticity have made them amenable to man's control to a
+degree which puts a wide difference between them and their wild
+relations. A wild ass, though brought up from its birth in a stable,
+would make a very intractable costermonger's moke. We may infer from
+this that the first subjugation of each of our common domestic animals
+was the achievement of some genius, or of some tribe favourably
+situated, and that they spread from that centre by sale or barter,
+rather than that they were separately domesticated in many places. This
+would partly explain why a few species of widely different families are
+so universally kept in all countries to the exclusion of hundreds of
+species nearly allied and apparently as suitable. When a want could be
+supplied by obtaining from another country an animal bred to live with
+man and serve him, the long and difficult task of softening down the
+wild instincts of a beast taken from the forests or the hills and
+acclimatising its constitution to a domestic life was not likely to be
+attempted.
+</p>
+<p>
+But there have been a few recent additions to our list of domestic
+animals. The turkey and the guinea fowl are examples, and perhaps
+within another generation we may be able to add the zebra. And there may
+be many other animals fitted to enrich and adorn human life which would
+make no insuperable resistance to domestication if wisely and patiently
+handled. Here is a noble opening for carrying out in its kindest sense
+the command, "Multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have
+dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and
+over every living thing that moveth upon the face of the earth."
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_9"><!-- RULE4 9 --></a>
+<h2>
+ IX
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+SNAKES
+</center>
+<p>
+I have met persons, otherwise quite sane, who told me that they would
+like to visit India if it were not for the <i>snakes</i>. Now there is
+something very depressing in the thought that this state of mind is
+extant in England, for it is calculated, on occasion, to have results of
+a most melancholy nature. By way of example, let us picture the case of
+a broken-hearted maiden forced to reject an ardent lover because duty
+calls him to a land where there are snakes. Think of his happiness
+blighted for ever and her doomed to a "perpetual maidenhood," harrowed
+with remorseful dreams of the hourly perils and horrors through which he
+must be passing without her, and dreading to enter an academy or
+picture-gallery lest a laocoon or a fury might revive apprehensions too
+horrible to be borne. In view of possibilities so dreadful, surely it is
+a duty that a man owes to his kind to disseminate the truth, if he can,
+about the present condition in the East of that reptile which, crawling
+on its belly and eating dust and having its head bruised by the
+descendants of Eve, sometimes pays off her share of the curse on their
+heels. Here the truth is.
+</p>
+<p>
+Within the limits of our Indian Empire, including Burmah and Ceylon,
+there are at present known to naturalists two hundred and sixty-four
+species of snakes. Twenty-seven of these are sea-serpents, which never
+leave the sea, and could not if they would. The remaining two hundred
+and thirty-seven species comprise samples of every size and pattern of
+limbless reptile found on this globe, from the gigantic python, which
+crushes a jackal and swallows it whole, to the little burrowing
+<i>Typhlops</i>, whose proportions are those of an earthworm and its food
+white ants.
+</p>
+<p>
+If you have made up your mind never to touch a snake or go nearer to one
+than you can help, then I need scarcely tell you what you know already,
+that these are all alike hideous and repulsive in their aspect, being
+smeared from head to tail with a viscous and venomous slime, which, as
+your Shakespeare will tell you, leaves a trail even on fig-leaves when
+they have occasion to pass over such. This preparation would appear to
+line them inside as well as out, for there is no lack of ancient and
+modern testimony to the fact that they "slaver" their prey all over
+before swallowing it, that it may slide the more easily down their
+ghastly throats. Their eye is cruel and stony, and possesses a peculiar
+property known as "fascination," which places their victims entirely at
+their mercy. They have also the power of coiling themselves up like a
+watch-spring and discharging themselves from a considerable distance at
+those whom they have doomed to death&mdash;a fact which is attested by such
+passages in the poets as&mdash;</p>
+
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p> Like adder darting from his coil,</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+
+<p class="cont">and by travellers <i>passim</i>.
+</p>
+<p>
+This is the true faith with respect to all serpents, and if you are
+resolved to remain steadfast in it, you may do so even in India, for it
+is possible to live in that country for months, I might almost say
+years, without ever getting a sight of a live snake except in the basket
+of a snake-charmer. If, however, you are minded to cultivate an
+acquaintance with them, it is not difficult to find opportunities of
+doing so, but I must warn you that it will be with jeopardy to your
+faith, for the very first thing that will strike you about them will
+probably be their cleanness. What has become of the classical slime I
+cannot tell, but it is a fact that the skin of a modern snake is always
+delightfully dry and clean, and as smooth to the touch as velvet.
+</p>
+<p>
+The next thing that attracts attention is their beauty, not so much the
+beauty of their colours as of their forms. With few exceptions, snakes
+are the most graceful of living things. Every position into which they
+put themselves, and every motion of their perfectly proportioned forms,
+is artistic. The effect of this is enhanced by their gentleness and the
+softness of their movements.
+</p>
+<p>
+But if you want to see them properly, you must be careful not to
+frighten them, for there is no creature more timid at heart than a
+snake. One will sometimes let you get quite near to it and watch it,
+simply because it does not notice you, being rather deaf and very
+shortsighted, but when it does discover your presence, its one thought
+is to slip away quietly and hide itself. It is on account of this
+extreme timidity that we see them so seldom.
+</p>
+<p>
+Of the two hundred and thirty-seven kinds that I have referred to, some
+are, of course, very rare, or only found in particular parts of the
+country, but at least forty or fifty of them occur everywhere, and some
+are as plentiful as crows. Yet they keep themselves out of our way so
+successfully that it is quite a rare event to meet with one.
+Occasionally one finds its way into a house in quest of frogs, lizards,
+musk-rats, or some other of the numerous malefactors that use our
+dwellings as cities of refuge from the avenger, and it is discovered by
+the Hamal behind a cupboard, or under a carpet. He does the one thing
+which it occurs to a native to do in any emergency&mdash;viz. raises an
+alarm. Then there is a general hubbub, servants rush together with the
+longest sticks they can find, the children are hurried away to a place
+of safety, the master appears on the scene, armed with his gun, and the
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p> Wee, sleekit, cowrin', tim'rous beastie,</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+trying to slip away from the fuss which it dislikes so much, is headed,
+and blown, or battered, to pieces. Then its head is pounded to a jelly,
+for the servants are agreed that, if this precaution is omitted, it will
+revive during the night and come and coil itself on the chest of its
+murderer.
+</p>
+<p>
+Finally a council is held and a unanimous resolution recorded that
+deceased was a serpent of the deadliest kind. This is not a lie, for
+they believe it; but in the great majority of cases it is an untruth. Of
+our two hundred and thirty-seven kinds of snakes only forty-four are
+ranked by naturalists as venomous, and many of these are quite incapable
+of killing any animal as large as a man. Others are very rare or local.
+In short, we may reckon the poisonous snakes with which we have any
+practical concern at four kinds, and the chance of a snake found in the
+house belonging to one of these kinds stands at less than one in ten.
+</p>
+<p>
+It is a sufficiently terrible thought, however, that there are even four
+kinds of reptiles going silently about the land whose bite is certain
+death. If they knew their powers and were maliciously disposed, our life
+in the East would be like Christian's progress through the Valley of the
+Shadow of Death. But the poisonous snakes are just as timid as the rest,
+and as little inclined to act on the offensive against any living
+creature except the little animals on which they prey. Even a trodden
+worm will turn, and a snake has as much spirit as a worm. If a man
+treads on it, it will turn and bite him. But it has no desire to be
+trodden on. It does its best to avoid that mischance, and, I need
+scarcely say, so does a man unless he is drunk. When both parties are
+sincerely anxious to avoid a collision, a collision is not at all likely
+to occur, and the fact is that, of all forms of death to which we are
+exposed in India, death by snake-bite is about the one which we have
+least reason to apprehend.
+</p>
+<p>
+During a pretty long residence in India I have heard of only one
+instance of an Englishman being killed by a snake. It was in Manipur,
+and I read of it in the newspapers. During the same time I have heard of
+only one death by lightning and one by falling into the fermenting vat
+of a brewery, so I suppose these accidents are equally uncommon. Eating
+oysters is much more fatal: I have heard of at least four or five deaths
+from that cause.
+</p>
+<p>
+The natives are far more exposed to danger from snakes than we are,
+because they go barefoot, by night as well as day, through fields and
+along narrow, overgrown footpaths about their villages. The tread of a
+barefooted man does not make noise enough to warn a snake to get out of
+his way, and if he treads on one, there is nothing between its fangs and
+his skin. Again, the huts of the natives, being made of wattle and daub
+and thatched with straw, offer to snakes just the kind of shelter that
+they like, and the wonder is that naked men, sleeping on the ground in
+such places, and poking about dark corners, among their stores of fuel
+and other chattels, meet with so few accidents. It says a great deal for
+the mild and inoffensive nature of the snake. Still, the total number of
+deaths by snake-bite reported every year is very large, and looks
+absolutely appalling if you do not think of dividing it among three
+hundred millions. Treated in that way it shrivels up at once, and when
+compared with the results of other causes of death, looks quite
+insignificant.
+</p>
+<p>
+The natives themselves are so far from regarding the serpent tribe with
+our feelings that the deadliest of them all has been canonised and is
+treated with all the respect due to a sub-deity. No Brahmin, or
+religious-minded man of any respectable caste, will have a cobra killed
+on any account. If one takes to haunting his premises, he will
+propitiate it with offerings of silk and look for good luck from its
+patronage.
+</p>
+<p>
+About snakes other than the cobra the average native concerns himself so
+little that he does not know one from another by sight. They are all
+classed together as <i>janwar,</i> a word which answers exactly to the
+"venomous beast" of Acts xxviii. 4; and though they are aware that some
+are deadly and some are not, any particular snake that a <i>sahib</i> has had
+the honour to kill is one of the deadliest as a matter of course. I have
+never met a native who knew that a venomous snake could be distinguished
+by its fangs, except a few doctors and educated men who have imbibed
+western science. In fact they do not think of the venom as a material
+substance situated in the mouth. It is an effluence from the entire
+animal, which may be projected at a man in various ways, by biting him,
+or spitting at him, or giving him a flick with the tail.
+</p>
+<p>
+The Government of India spends a large sum of money every year in
+rewards for the destruction of snakes. This is one of those sacrifices
+to sentiment which every prudent government offers. The sentiment to
+which respect is paid in this case is of course British, not Indian.
+Indian sentiment is propitiated by not levying any tax on dogs, so the
+pariah cur, owned and disowned, in all stages of starvation, mange and
+disease, infests every town and village, lying in wait for the bacillus
+of rabies. Against the one fatal case of snake-bite mentioned above, I
+have known of at least half a dozen deaths among Englishmen from the
+more horrible scourge of hydrophobia. In the steamer which brought me
+home there were two private soldiers on their way to M. Pasteur, at the
+expense, of course, of the British Government.
+</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_101"><!-- RULE4 10 --></a>
+<h2>
+ X
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+THE INDIAN SNAKE-CHARMER
+</center>
+<p>
+We must wait for another month or two before we can think of the winter
+in this country in the past tense, but in India the month of March is
+the beginning of the hot season, and the tourists who have been enjoying
+the pleasant side of Anglo-Indian life and assuring themselves that
+their exiled countrymen have not much to grumble at will now be making
+haste to flee.
+</p>
+<p>
+During the month the various hotels of Bombay will be pretty familiar
+with the grey sun-hat, fortified with <i>puggaree</i> and pendent flap, which
+is the sign of the globe-trotter in the East. And all the tribe of birds
+of prey who look upon him as their lawful spoil will recognise the sign
+from afar and gather about him as he sits in the balcony after
+breakfast, taking his last view of the gorgeous East, and perhaps (it is
+to be feared) seeking inspiration for a few matured reflections
+wherewith to bring the forthcoming book to an impressive close. The
+vendor of Delhi jewellery will be there and the Sind-work-box-walla,
+with his small, compressed white turban and spotless robes, and the
+Cashmere shawl merchant and many more, pressing on the gentleman's
+notice for the last time their most tempting wares and preparing for the
+long bout of fence which will decide at what point between "asking
+price" and "selling price" each article shall change ownership. The
+distance between these two points is wide and variable, depending upon
+the indications of wealth about the purchaser's person and the
+indications of innocence about his countenance.
+</p>
+<p>
+And when the poor globe-trotter, who has long since spent more money
+than he ever meant to spend, and loaded himself with things which he
+could have got cheaper in London or New York, tries to shake off his
+tormentors by getting up and leaning over the balcony rails, the shrill
+voice of the snake-charmer will assail him from below, promising him, in
+a torrent of sonorous Hindustanee, variegated with pigeon English and
+illuminated with wild gesticulations, such a superfine <i>tamasha</i> as it
+never was the fortune of the <i>sahib</i> to witness before.
+</p>
+<p>
+<i>Tamasha</i> is one of those Indian words, like <i>bundobust</i>, for which
+there is no equivalent in the English language, and which are at once so
+comprehensive and so expressive that, when once the use of them has been
+acquired, they become indispensable, so that they have gained a
+permanent place in the Anglo-Indian's vocabulary. It is not slang, but a
+good word of ancient origin. Hobson-Jobson quotes a curious Latin writer
+on the Empire of the Grand Mogul, who uses it with a definition
+appended, "ut spectet Thamasham, id est pugnas elephantorum, leonum,
+buffalorum et aliarura ferarum." "Show" comes nearest it in English, but
+falls far short of it.
+</p>
+<p>
+The <i>tamasha</i> which the snake-charmer promises the <i>sahib</i> will include
+serpent dances, a fight between a cobra and a mungoose, the inevitable
+mango tree, and other tricks of juggling. But to a stranger the
+snake-charmer himself is a better <i>tamasha</i> than anything he can show.
+He is indeed a most extraordinary animal. His hair and beard are long
+and unkempt, his general aspect wild, his clothing a mixture of savagery
+and the wreckage of civilisation. He wears a turban, of course, and
+generally a large one; but it is put on without art, just wound about
+his head anyhow, and hanging lopsidedly over one ear. It and the loose
+cloth wrapped about the middle of him are as dirty as may be and truly
+Oriental, though erratic. But, besides these, he wears a jacket of
+coloured calico, or any other material, with one button fastened,
+probably on the wrong buttonhole, and under this, if the weather is
+cold, he may have a shirt seemingly obtained from some Indian
+representative of Moses &amp; Co.
+</p>
+<p>
+On his shoulder he carries a long bamboo, from the ends of which hang
+villainously shabby baskets, some flat and round, occupied by snakes,
+others large and oblong, filled with apparatus of jugglery. The members
+of his family, down to an unclothed, precocious imp of ten, accompany
+him, carrying similar baskets, or capacious wallets, or long,
+cylindrical drums, on which they play with their fingers. The dramatic
+effect of the whole is enhanced when one of them allows a huge python, a
+snake of the <i>Boa constrictor</i> tribe, which kills its prey by crushing
+it, to wind its hideous, speckled coils round his body.
+</p>
+<p>
+What the snake-charmer is by race or origin ethnologists may determine
+when they have done with the gipsy. He is not a Hindu. No particular
+part of the country acknowledges him as its native. He is to the great
+races, castes, and creeds of India what the waif is to the billows of
+the sea. His language, in public at least, is Hindustanee, but this is a
+sort of <i>lingua franca</i>, the common property of all the inhabitants of
+the country. His religion is probably one of the many forms of demon
+worship which grow rank on the fringes of Hinduism. He must be classed,
+no doubt, with the other wandering tribes which roam the country,
+camping under umbrellas, or something little better, each consecrated to
+some particular form of common crime, and each professing some not in
+itself dishonest occupation, like the tinkering of gipsies.
+</p>
+<p>
+But the snake-charmer is the best known and most widely spread of them
+all. By occupation he is a professor of three occult sciences. First, he
+is a juggler, and in this art he has some skill. His masterpiece is the
+famous mango trick, which consists in making a miniature mango tree
+grow up in a few minutes, and even blossom and bear fruit, out of some
+bare spot which he has covered with his mysterious basket. It has been
+written about by travellers in extravagant terms of astonishment and
+admiration, but, as generally performed, is an extremely clumsy-looking
+trick, though it is undoubtedly difficult to guess how it is done. A
+more blood-curdling feat is to put the unclothed and precocious imp
+aforementioned under a large basket, and then run a sword savagely
+through and through every corner of it, and draw it out covered with
+gore. When the sickened spectators are about to lynch the murderer, the
+imp runs in smiling from the garden gate.
+</p>
+<p>
+The connection between these performances and the man's second trade,
+namely, snake-charming, is not obvious to a Western mind; but it must be
+remembered that the snake-charmer is not a mere, vulgar juggler, amusing
+people with sleight-of-hand. His feats are miracles, performed with the
+assistance of superior powers. In short, he is a theosophist, only his
+converse is not with excorporated Mahatmas from Thibet, but with spirits
+of another grade, whose Superior has been known from very remote
+antiquity as an Old Serpent. In deference to this respectable connection
+the cobra holds a distinguished place even in orthodox Hinduism. So it
+is altogether fit that a performer of wonders should be on intimate
+terms with the serpent tribe. The snake-charmer keeps all sorts of
+them, but chiefly cobras. These he professes to charm from their holes
+by playing upon an instrument which may have some hereditary connection
+with the bagpipe, for it has an air-reservoir consisting of a large
+gourd, and it makes a most abominable noise. As soon as the cobra shows
+itself the charmer catches it by the tail with one hand, and, running
+the other swiftly along its body, grips it firmly just behind the jaws,
+so that it cannot turn and bite. Practice and coolness make this an easy
+feat. Then the poison fangs are pulled out with a pair of forceps and
+the cobra is quite harmless. It is kept in a round, flat basket, out of
+which, when the charmer removes the lid and begins to play, it raises
+its graceful head, and, expanding its hood, sways gently in response to
+the music.
+</p>
+<p>
+Scientific men aver that a snake has no ears and cannot possibly hear
+the strains of the pipe, but that sort of science simply spoils a
+picturesque subject like the snake-charmer. So much is certain, that all
+snakes cannot be played upon in this way: there are some species which
+are utterly callous to the influences to which the cobra yields itself
+so readily. No missionary will find any difficulty in getting a
+snake-charmer to appreciate that Scripture text about the deaf adder
+which will not listen to the voice of the charmer, charm he never so
+wisely.
+</p>
+<p>
+To these two occupations the snake-charmer adds that of a medicine man,
+for who should know the occult potencies of herbs and trees so well as
+he? So, as he wanders from village to village, he is welcomed as well as
+feared. But one wealthy tourist is worth more to him than a whole
+village of ryots, so he keeps his eye on every town in which he is
+likely to fall in with the travelling white man. And the travelling
+white man would be sorry to miss him, for he is one of the few relics of
+an ancient state of things which railways and telegraphs and the
+Educational Department have left unchanged.
+</p>
+<p>
+The itinerant jeweller and the Sind-work-box-walla are unmistakably
+being left behind as the East hurries after the West, and we shall soon
+know them no more. Showy shops, where the inexperienced traveller may
+see all the products of Sind and Benares, and Cutch and Cashmere, spread
+before him at fixed prices, are multiplying rapidly and taking the bread
+from the mouth of the poor hawker. But the snake-charmer seems safe from
+that kind of competition. It is difficult to forecast a time when a
+broad signboard in Rampart Row will invite the passer-by to visit Mr.
+Nagshett's world-renowned Serpent Tamasha, Mungoose and Cobra Fight,
+Mango-tree Illusion, etc. Entrance, one rupee.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_10"><!-- RULE4 10 --></a>
+<h2>
+ XI
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+CURES FOR SNAKE-BITE
+</center>
+<p>
+In a little book on the snakes of India, published many years ago by Dr.
+Nicholson of the Madras Medical Service, the conviction was expressed
+that the snake-charmers of Burmah knew of some antidote to the poison of
+the cobra which gave them confidence in handling it. He said that
+nothing would induce them to divulge it, but that he suspected it
+consisted in gradual inoculation with the venom itself. Putting the
+question to himself why he did not attempt to attest this by experiment,
+he replied that there were two reasons, which, if I recollect rightly,
+were, first, that he had a strong natural repugnance to anything like
+cruelty to animals, and, secondly, that he had observed that as soon as
+a man got the notion into his head that he had discovered a cure for
+snake-bite, he began to show symptoms of insanity.
+</p>
+<p>
+It is rather remarkable that, after so many years, another Scottish
+doctor, not in Madras, but in Edinburgh, has proved, by just such
+experiments as Dr. Nicholson shrank from, that an "aged and previously
+sedate horse" may, by gradual inoculation with cobra poison, be
+rendered so thoroughly proof against it that a dose which would suffice
+to kill ten ordinary horses only imparts "increased vigour and
+liveliness" to it. Further, Dr. Fraser has found that the serum of the
+blood of an animal thus rendered proof against poison is itself an
+antidote capable of combating that poison after it has been at work for
+thirty minutes in the veins of a rabbit, and arresting its effects. And
+all this has been achieved without apparent detriment to the
+distinguished doctor's sanity.
+</p>
+<p>
+This must be intensely interesting intelligence to Englishmen throughout
+India, and joyful intelligence too, for, scoff as we may at the danger
+of being bitten by a poisonous snake, nobody likes to think that, if
+such a thing <i>should</i> happen to him (and very narrow escapes sometimes
+remind us that it may), there would be nothing for him to do but to lie
+down and die. And so, ever since the Honourable East India Company was
+chartered, the antidote to snake poison has been a sort of philosopher's
+stone, sought after by doctors and men of science along many lines of
+investigation. And every now and then somebody has risen up and
+announced that he has found it, and has had disciples for a season.
+</p>
+<p>
+But one remedy after another, though it might give startling results in
+the laboratory, has proved to be useless in common life, and the
+majority of Englishmen have long since resigned themselves to the
+conclusion that there is no practical cure for the bite of a poisonous
+snake. For what avails it to carry about in your travelling bag a phial
+of strong ammonia and to live in more jeopardy of death by asphyxiation
+than you ever were by snakes, unless you have some guarantee that, when
+it is your fate to be bitten by a snake, the phial will be at hand? For
+ammonia must act on the venom before the venom has had time to act upon
+you, or it will only add another pain to your end; and that gives only a
+few minutes to go upon. So with nitric acid and every agent that
+operates by neutralising the poison and not by counteracting its
+effects. And this has been the character of all the remedies hitherto
+put forward. "They are," says Sir Joseph Fayrer, "absolutely without any
+specific effect on the condition produced by the poison."
+</p>
+<p>
+But "anti-venene," as Dr. Fraser calls his immunised blood-serum,
+follows the poison into the system, even after the fatal symptoms have
+begun to show themselves, and arrests them at once. So the Anglo-Indian
+may throw away his ammonia phial and, arming himself with another of
+anti-venene and a hypodermic syringe, feel that he is safe against an
+accident which will never happen. As for the man who is not nervous, he
+will speak of the new antidote, and think of it as most interesting and
+valuable, and go on his way as before with no expectation of ever being
+bitten by a venomous snake. The medical man of every degree will order
+a supply as soon as it is to be had, and conscientiously try to stamp
+out the smouldering hope within him that somebody in the station will
+soon be bitten by a cobra and give him a chance.
+</p>
+<p>
+Among the dusky millions of India Dr. Fraser's discovery will create no
+"catholic ravishment" because they will not hear of it. And if they did
+hear of it they would regard his labours as misapplied and the result as
+superfluous. For the Hindu has never shared the Englishman's opinion
+that there is no cure for snake-bite. On the contrary, he is assured
+that there are not one or two but many specifics for the bite of every
+kind of snake, known to those whose business it is to know them. If they
+are not invariably efficacious, it is for the simple reason that if a
+man's time has come to die he will die. But if his time has not come to
+die they will not fail to cure him, and since no man can know when he is
+bitten whether his time has come or not, he will lay the odds against
+Fate by trying, not one or another of them, but as many as he can hear
+of or get. Some of them are drastic in their effects, and so it too
+often proves that the poor man's time has indeed come, for though he
+might survive the snake he succumbs to the cure.
+</p>
+<p>
+It is many years now since the news was brought to me one day that a man
+whom I knew very well had been bitten by a deadly serpent and was dying.
+He was a fine, strongly built young fellow, a Mohammedan, in the employ
+of a Parsee liquor distiller, in whose godown he was arranging firewood
+when he was bitten in the foot. Without looking at the snake he rushed
+out and, falling on his face on the ground, implored the bystanders to
+take care of his wife and children as he was a dead man. The news spread
+and all the village ran together. The man was taken to an open room in
+his employer's premises and vigorous measures for his recovery were set
+on foot, in which his employer's family and servants, his own friends
+and as many of the general public as chose to look in, were allowed to
+take part.
+</p>
+<p>
+First of all, some jungle men were called in, for the man of the jungle
+must naturally know more about snakes than other men. These were
+probably Katkurrees, an aboriginal race, who live by woodcutting,
+hunting and other sylvan occupations. They proved to be practical men
+and at once sucked the wound. An intelligent Havildar of the Customs
+Department, who chanced to be present, then lanced the wound slightly to
+let the blood flow, and tied the leg tightly in two places above it.
+This was admirable. If what the jungle men and the Havildar did were
+always and promptly done whenever a man is bitten by a snake, few such
+accidents would end fatally.
+</p>
+<p>
+But this poor man's friends did not stop there. A supply of chickens had
+been procured with all haste, and these were scientifically applied.
+This is a remedy in which the natives have great faith, and I have known
+Europeans who were convinced of its efficacy. The manner of its
+application scarcely admits of description in these pages, but the
+effect is that the chickens absorb the poison and die, while the man
+lives. The number of chickens required is a gauge of the virulence of
+the serpent, for as soon as the venom is all extracted they cease to
+die. Nobody, however, could tell me how many chickens perished in this
+case. They were all too busy to stop and note the result of one remedy
+while another remained untried. And there were many yet.
+</p>
+<p>
+Somebody suggested that the venom should be dislodged from the patient's
+stomach, so an emetic was administered in the form of a handful of
+common salt, with immediate and seismic effect. Then a decoction of
+<i>neem</i> leaves was poured down the man's throat. The <i>neem</i> tree is an
+enemy of all fevers and a friend of man generally, so much so that it is
+healthful to sleep under its shade. Therefore a decoction of the leaves
+could not fail to be beneficial in one way or another. The residue of
+the leaves was well rubbed into the crown of the man's head for more
+direct effect on the brains in case they might be affected. Something
+else was rubbed in under the root of the tongue.
+</p>
+<p>
+In the meantime a man with some experience in exorcism had brought twigs
+of a tree of well-ascertained potency in expelling the devil, and
+advised that, in view of the known connection between serpents and
+Satan, it would be well to try beating the patient with these. The
+advice was taken, and many stripes were laid upon him. Massage was also
+tried, and other homely expedients, such as bandaging and thumping with
+the fists, were not neglected.
+</p>
+<p>
+It was about noon when I was told of the accident, and I went down at
+once and found the poor man in a woeful state, as well he might be after
+such rough handling as he had suffered for four consecutive hours; but
+he was quite conscious and there was neither pain nor swelling in the
+bitten foot. I remonstrated most vigorously, pointing out that the
+snake, which nobody had seen, might not have been a venomous one at all,
+that there were no symptoms of poisoning, except such as might also be
+explained by the treatment the man had suffered at the hands of his
+friends, and that, in short, I could see no reason to think he was going
+to die unless they were determined to kill him.
+</p>
+<p>
+My words appeared to produce a good effect on the Parsees at least, and
+they consented to stop curing the man and let him rest, giving him such
+stimulating refreshment as he would take, for he was a pious Mussulman
+and would not touch wine or spirits. I said what I could to cheer him
+up, and went away hoping that I had saved a human life. Alas! In an hour
+or so a friend came in with a root of rare virtue and persuaded the man
+to swallow some preparation of it. <i>Post hoc</i>, whether <i>propter hoc</i> I
+dare not say, he became unconscious and sank. Before night he was
+buried.
+</p>
+<p>
+All this did not happen in some obscure village in a remote jungle. It
+happened within a mile and a half of a town controlled by a municipal
+corporation which enjoys the rights and privileges of "local
+self-government." In that town there was a dispensary, with a very
+capable assistant-surgeon in charge, and in that dispensary I doubt not
+you would have found a bottle of strong <i>liquor ammoni&aelig;</i> and a printed
+copy of the directions issued by a paternal Government for the recovery
+of persons bitten by venomous serpents. But when the man was bitten the
+one thing which occurred to nobody was to take him there, and when I
+heard of the matter the assistant-surgeon had just left for a distant
+place, passing on his way the gate of the house in which the man lay.
+This was a bad case, but there is little reason to hope that it was
+altogether exceptional. I am afraid there can be no question at all that
+hundreds of the deaths put down to snake-bite by village punchayets
+every year might with more truth be registered as "cured to death."
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_11"><!-- RULE4 11 --></a>
+<h2>
+ XII
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+THE COBRA BUNGALOW
+</center>
+<center>
+A STORY OF A MONEYLENDER
+</center>
+<p>
+Beharil Surajmul was the greatest moneylender in Dowlutpoor. He was a
+man of rare talents. He remembered the face of every man who had at any
+time come to borrow money of him since he began to work, as a little
+boy, in his father's office, so that it was impossible to deceive him.
+He had also such a miraculous skill in the making out of accounts that a
+poor man who had come to him in extremity for a loan of fifty rupees, to
+meet the expenses of his daughter's marriage, might go on making
+payments for the remainder of his life without reducing the debt by one
+rupee. In fact, it seemed to increase with each payment.
+</p>
+<p>
+And if the matter went into court, Beharilal never failed to show that
+there was still a balance due to him much larger than the original loan.
+But so courteous and pleasant was the Seth in his manner to all that
+such matters never went into court until the right time, of which he was
+an infallible judge, for he knew the private affairs of every family in
+Dowlutpoor. Then a decree was obtained and the debtor's house, or land,
+was sold to defray the debt, Beharilal himself being usually the
+purchaser, though not, of course, in his own name, for he was a prudent
+man.
+</p>
+<p>
+By these means Beharilal had become possessed of large estates, which he
+managed with such skill that they yielded to him revenues which they had
+never yielded to the former owners of them, while his tenants, who were
+mostly former owners, grew daily more deeply involved in their pecuniary
+obligations to him, and therefore entertained no thought of leaving him,
+for he could put them into prison any day if he chose. Their contentment
+gave him great satisfaction, and he treated them with benevolence,
+giving them advances of money for all their necessary expenses and
+appropriating the whole of their crops at the harvest to repay himself.
+He bound them to buy all that they had need of at his shop, so that he
+made profit off them on both sides.
+</p>
+<p>
+And as his wealth increased, his person increased with it and his
+appearance became more imposing, so that he was regarded everywhere with
+the highest respect and esteem. He was, moreover, a very religious man
+and charitable beyond most. By early risers he might be seen in his
+garden seeking out the nests of ants and giving them, with his own
+hands, their daily dole of rice. It was his benevolent thoughtfulness
+which had supplied drinking troughs for the flocks of pigeons that
+continually plundered the stores of the other grain merchants. He had
+also established a pinjrapole for aged, sickly and ownerless animals of
+all kinds. To this he required all his tenants to send their bullocks
+when they became unfit for work, and he sold them new cattle, good and
+strong, at prices fixed by himself. If any of his old debtors, when
+reduced to beggary, came to his door for alms, they were never sent away
+without a handful of rice or a copper coin. He kept a bag of the
+smallest copper coins always at hand for such purposes.
+</p>
+<p>
+Beharilal had a fine house, designed by himself and surrounded by a vast
+garden stocked with mangoes, guavas, custard apples, oranges and other
+fruit trees, and made beautiful and fragrant with all manner of flowers.
+The cool shade drew together birds of many kinds from the dry plains of
+the surrounding country, and it pleased Beharilal to think that they
+also were recipients of his bounty and that the benefits which he
+conferred on them would certainly be entered to the credit of his
+account with Heaven.
+</p>
+<p>
+Some he fed, such as the crows, which flocked about the back door, like
+a convocation of Christian padres, in the morning and afternoon, when
+the ladies of his family gave out their portion of boiled rice and ghee.
+The pigeons also came together in hundreds in an open space under the
+shade of a noble peepul tree, where grain was thrown out for them at
+three o'clock every day; and among them were many chattering sparrows
+and not a few green parrots, which walked quaintly among the bustling
+pigeons, their long tails moving from side to side like the pointer of
+the scale on which the Bunia weighed his rupees. This resemblance struck
+him as he reclined against the fat red cushion in his verandah summing
+up his gains. There were other birds which would not eat his food, but
+found abundance, suited to their respective castes, among the shrubs and
+trees that he had planted. Mynas walked eagerly on the lawns looking for
+grasshoppers, glittering sunbirds hovered over the flowers, thrusting
+their slender bills into each nectar-laden blossom, bulbuls twittered
+among the mulberries and the koel made the shady banian tree resound
+with its melodious notes.
+</p>
+<p>
+In a remote corner of the garden, under the dark shade of a tamarind,
+there stood a small shrine, like a whitewashed tomb, with a niche or
+recess on one side of it containing a conical stone smeared with red
+ochre. Some called it Mahadeo and some Khandoba, but no one could
+explain the presence of a Mahratta god in a Bunia's garden in
+Dowlutpoor, except by quoting an old tradition about one Narayen who had
+come from the Mahratta country and lived for many years in this place.
+Some said he was a prosperous goldsmith of great piety, but others
+maintained that he was a Sunyasee, or saint, and there was no certainty
+in the matter. The one point on which all were agreed was the great
+sanctity of the shrine, and Beharilal was most careful to perform at it
+every ceremony which custom, or tradition, sanctioned for placating the
+god and averting any calamity that might arise from his displeasure.
+</p>
+<p>
+At the base of one of the old cracked walls of the shrine there was a
+hole which was the den of a very large, black cobra. Several times it
+had been seen in the garden, and, when pursued, had glided into this
+hole and escaped. When Beharilal first heard of it he was much troubled
+in his mind, but, having consulted a Brahmin, he gave strict injunctions
+that the reptile should not be molested, and since that time he had
+never failed to place an offering of milk near to the hole in the
+morning and in the evening.
+</p>
+<p>
+Now it happened that at this time there was in Dowlutpoor an English
+doctor who was generally known as the Jadoo-walla Saheb, because he was
+believed to practise sorcery and had some mysterious need of snakes.
+Perhaps he was only making experiments with their venom. At any rate, he
+wanted live cobras and offered a good price for them. So when Nagoo, the
+snake-charmer, heard that there was a large one in Beharilal's garden,
+he thought he might do good business by capturing it for the Jadoo-walla
+Saheb, and at the same time demanding a reward from the timorous Bunia
+for ridding him of such a dangerous neighbour. With this intent he
+repaired to the garden with all the apparatus of his art, his flat
+snake baskets, his mongoose and his crooked pipe. Having reconnoitred
+the ground, he commenced operations by sitting down on his hams and
+producing such ear-splitting strains from the crooked pipe as might have
+charmed Cerberus to leave his kennel at the gate of hell. Great was his
+surprise and mortification when he heard the voice of Beharilal raised
+in tones of unwonted passion and saw a stalwart Purdaisee advancing
+towards him armed with an iron-bound lathee, who, without ceremony, nay,
+with abusive epithets, hustled him and all his gear out of the garden.
+Nagoo was a snake-charmer and by nature a gipsy, and this treatment
+rankled in his dark bosom.
+</p>
+<p>
+Some weeks passed and the sun had scarcely risen when Beharilal sat in
+the ota in front of his house at his daily business, which began as soon
+as his teeth were cleaned and ended about eleven at night. The place was
+not tidy. Two or three mats were spread on the floor, a spare one was
+rolled up in a corner, several pairs of shoes were on the steps,
+umbrellas leaned against the wall, handles downwards, and a large chatty
+of drinking water stood beside them. The Bunia himself, bare-headed and
+bare-footed, sat cross-legged on a cushion, with a wooden stool in front
+of him, on which lay an open ledger of stout yellowish paper, bound in
+soft red leather and nearly two feet in length. In this he was carefully
+entering yesterday's transactions with a reed pen, which he dipped
+frequently in a brass inkpot filled with a sponge soaked in a muddy
+black fluid.
+</p>
+<p>
+Beside him sat his son, aged two years, playing with the red, lacquered
+cylinder in which he kept his reed pens. Beharilal had two girls also,
+but they were with the women folk in the interior of the house, where he
+was content they should stay. This was his only boy, the pride and joy
+of his heart. Engrossed as he was in recording his gains, he could not
+refrain from lifting his eyes now and again to feast them on that rotund
+little body, like a goblet set on two pillars. No clothing concealed the
+tense and shiny brown skin, but there were silver bracelets on the fat
+wrists and massive anklets where deep creases divided the fat little
+feet from the fat little legs, and a representation, in chased silver,
+of Eve's fig leaf hung from a silver chain which encircled the sphere
+that should have been his waist. His globular head was curiously shaven.
+From two deep pits between the bulging brow and the fat cheeks that
+nearly squeezed out the little nose between them, two black diamonds
+twinkled, full of wonder, as the small purse mouth prattled to itself
+softly and inarticulately of the mysteries of life.
+</p>
+<p>
+Suddenly a startled cry, passing into a prolonged wail of fear, roused
+old Beharilal, and he saw a sight that nearly caused him to swoon with
+terror. The little man, a moment ago so placid and happy, was shrinking
+back with "I don't like that thing" inscribed in lines of anguish on
+his distorted face, and not three feet from him a huge cobra, just
+emerged from the roll of matting, eyed him with a stony stare, its head
+raised and its hood expanded. Its quivering tongue flickered out from
+between its lips like distant flashes of forked lightning.
+</p>
+<p>
+For a moment Beharilal stood stupefied, then all the heroism that was in
+him spent itself at once. Seizing the heavy wooden stool in both his
+hands, he raised it high over his head and dashed it down on the
+reptile. The sharp edge of hard wood broke its back, and as it wriggled
+and lashed about, biting at everything within reach, the Bunia snatched
+up his boy and waddled into the house at a pace to which he had long
+been unaccustomed, calling out, in frantic gasps, for help. A rush of
+excited and screaming women met him in the inner court, and he dropped
+his precious burden, with pious ejaculations, into the arms of its
+mother, and stood panting and speechless. Then calling aloud to know if
+all danger was past, he ventured cautiously out again and saw that the
+Purdaisee and the Malee had ejected the wriggling cobra and were
+pounding its head into a jelly with a big stone.
+</p>
+<p>
+For some seconds he looked on in a strange stupor, and then he realised
+what he had done. He, Beharilal, the Bunia, who had always removed the
+insects so tenderly from his own person that they were not hurt, who had
+never committed the sin of killing a mosquito or a fly; he, with his own
+hands, had taken the life of the guardian cobra of the shrine!
+"Urray-ray! Bap-ray!" he cried, "for what demerit of mine has this
+ill-luck befallen me in my old age? What will happen now?"
+</p>
+<p>
+"Nay, Sethjkee," said the Malee, "be not afraid. It was in your destiny
+that this offspring of Satan should come to its end by your hand. We
+have pounded its head properly, so it will not return to you,"
+</p>
+<p>
+"But what of its mate?" said Beharilal. "I have heard that, if any man
+kills a cobra, its mate will follow him by day and by night until it has
+had its revenge. Is that not so?"
+</p>
+<p>
+The Malee answered, "Chh, Chh! There is no mate of this cobra," but his
+tone was not confident.
+</p>
+<p>
+"Go," cried Beharilal&mdash;"go quickly and call Nagoo, the snake-charmer. He
+has knowledge."
+</p>
+<p>
+"I will go," said the Malee, and set off at a run; but when he got out
+of the gate he lapsed into a leisurely walk, for why should a man lose
+his breath without cause? In time he found his way to the little
+settlement of huts constructed of poles and mats, where Nagoo sat on the
+ground smoking his "chillum," and told his errand.
+</p>
+<p>
+"Why should I come?" was Nagoo's reply; "I went to take away that cobra
+and the Bunia drove me from the garden with abuse. Why does he send for
+me now?"
+</p>
+<p>
+"He is a Bunia," said the Malee, as if that summed up the whole matter;
+but he added, after a pause, "If he sees a burning ground, he shakes
+like a peepul leaf. The cobra has died by his hand and his liver has
+become like water. Whatever you ask he will give. You should come,"
+</p>
+<p>
+Nagoo replied aloud, "I will come," and to himself, "I will give him
+physic." Then he took up his baskets and his pipe and followed the
+Malee.
+</p>
+<p>
+Beharilal proceeded to business with a directness foreign to his habit,
+looking over his shoulder at intervals lest a snake might be silently
+approaching. "Good Nagoo," he said, "a great misfortune has happened.
+The cobra of the shrine has been killed. Has it a mate?"
+</p>
+<p>
+"How can a cobra not have a mate?" answered Nagoo curtly.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then Beharilal employed the most insinuating of the many tones of his
+voice. "Listen, Nagoo. You are a man of skill. Capture that cobra and I
+will pay you well. I will give you five rupees." Then, observing no
+response in the wrinkled visage of the charmer, "I will give you ten
+rupees."
+</p>
+<p>
+Nagoo would have sold his revenge for a tithe of the wealth thus dangled
+before him, but he saw no reason to suppose that there was another cobra
+anywhere in the garden, so he answered with the calm confidence of an
+expert, "That cannot be done. The serpent will not heed any pipe now. In
+its mind there is only revenge."
+</p>
+<p>
+"Then what will it do?" said the trembling Bunia.
+</p>
+<p>
+"If its mate died by the hand of a man, it will follow that man until
+it has accomplished its purpose."
+</p>
+<p>
+"But how will it know," asked Beharilal, "by whose hand its mate died?"
+</p>
+<p>
+Nagoo replied with pious simplicity, "How can I tell by what means it
+knows? God informs it."
+</p>
+<p>
+"But," pleaded Beharilal, "is there no escape?&mdash;if a man goes away by
+the railway or by water?"
+</p>
+<p>
+Nagoo pondered for a moment and said, "If a man crossed the sea, the
+serpent would be baulked. If he goes by railway it will not leave him.
+Let him go to Madras, it will find him."
+</p>
+<p>
+With a faltering hand the Bunia put some rupees, uncounted, into the
+charmer's skinny palm, saying, "Go, make incantations. Do something.
+There is great knowledge of mysteries with you"; and he hurried back
+into the house.
+</p>
+<p>
+His arrangements were very soon made. His account books, with a bundle
+of bonds and hoondies and cash and his son, were put into a small cart
+drawn by a pair of fast trotting bullocks, into which he himself
+climbed, after looking under the cushion to see that there was no evil
+beast lurking there, and got away in haste while the sun was yet hot.
+The rest of the family followed with the household property, and in a
+few days the house was empty and only the Malee remained in charge. Many
+years have passed and the house is empty still, and the Malee, grown
+grey and frail, is still in charge. He gets no wages, but he sells the
+jasmine flowers and the mangoes and guavas, and he grows chillies and
+brinjals, and so fills the stomachs of himself and his little grandson
+and is contented. If you ask him where the Seth has gone, he replies,
+"Who knows?" His debt has gone with his creditor, "gone glimmering
+through the dream of things that were," and he has no desire to recall
+them.
+</p>
+<p>
+A civil or military officer from the station, taking a solitary walk,
+sometimes finds himself at the Cobra Bungalow, and turns in to wander
+among its old trees and unswept paths, obstructed by overgrown and
+untended shrubs, and wonders how it got its name. Then he pauses at the
+whitewashed shrine and notes that the god-stone has been freshly painted
+red and that chaplets of faded flowers lie before it. But the old Malee
+approaches with a meek salaam and a posy of jasmine and marigolds and
+warns him that there is a cobra in the shrine.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_12"><!-- RULE4 12 --></a>
+<h2>
+ XIII
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+THE PANTHER I DID NOT SHOOT
+</center>
+<p>
+It was January 13 of a good many years ago, in those happy days that
+have "gone glimmering through the dream of things that were." The sun
+had scarcely risen, and I was sitting in the cosy cabin of my yacht
+enjoying my "chota hazree," which, being interpreted, means "lesser
+presence," and in Anglo-Indian speech signifies an "eye-opener" of tea
+and toast&mdash;the greater presence appears some hours later and we call it
+breakfast. I will not say that the view from my cabin windows was
+enchanting. The placid waters of the broad creek would have been
+pleasant to look upon if the level rays of the sun in his strength had
+not skimmed them with such a blinding glare, but the low, flat-topped
+hills that bounded them were forbidding.
+</p>
+<p>
+The people said truly that God had made this a country of stones, but
+they forgot that He had clothed the stones with trees of evergreen
+foliage and a dense undergrowth of shrubs and grass, to protect and hold
+together the thick bed of loam which the fallen leaves enriched from
+year to year. It was the axes of their fathers that felled the trees,
+to sell for fuel, and the billhooks of their mothers that hacked away
+the bushes and grubbed up their very roots to burn on the household
+cooking hole. Then the torrential rains of the south-west monsoon came
+down on the naked, defenceless, parched and cracked soil and swept it in
+muddy cascades down to the sea, leaving flats of bare rock, strewn thick
+with round stones, sore to the best-shod foot of man and cruel to the
+hoofs of a horse. About and among the huts of the unswept and malodorous
+hamlet just above the shore there were fine trees, mango, tamarind,
+babool and bor, showing what might have been elsewhere.
+</p>
+<p>
+On the rounded top of the highest hill frowned in black ruin an old
+Mahratta fort, covered on the top and sides and choked within by that
+dense mass of struggling vegetation which always takes possession of old
+forts in India. The weather-worn stones and crumbling mortar seem to
+feed the trees to gluttony. First some bird-drops the seeds of the
+banian fig into crevices of the ramparts, and its insidious roots push
+their way and grow and grow into great tortuous snakes, embracing the
+massive blocks of basalt, heaving them up and holding them up, so that
+they cannot fall. Then prickly shrubs and thorny trees follow, fighting
+for every inch of ground, but quite unable to eject the gently
+persistent custard-apple, descended doubtless from seeds which the
+garrison dropped as they ate the luscious fruit, on account of which the
+Portuguese introduced the tree from South America. I had penetrated
+into that fort and had seen something of the snakes and birds of night,
+but not the ghosts and demons which I was assured made it their
+habitation by day.
+</p>
+<p>
+On a level place a little below the fort stood two monuments, telling of
+the days when the Honourable East India Company maintained a "Resident"
+at this place. Here he lived in proud solitude, upholding the British
+flag. But his wife and the little one on whose face he had not yet
+looked were on their way from Bombay in a native "pattimar" to join him,
+and as he stood gazing over the sea at the red setting sun one 5th of
+October, he thought of the glad to-morrow and the end of his dreary
+loneliness. It fell to him to put up one of these monuments, with a
+sorrowful inscription to all that was left to him on the following
+morning, the "memory" of a beloved wife and an infant thirty-one days
+old, drowned in crossing the bar on October 6, 1853.
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p>We have strewed our best to the weeds unrest,</p>
+ <p>To the shark and the sheering gull.</p>
+ <p>If blood be the price of admiralty,</p>
+ <p>Lord God, we ha' paid in full.</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+I carried my gun and rifle with me in my yacht. They served to keep up
+my character as a sportsman, and did not often require to be cleaned. So
+the morning calm of my mind was lashed into an unwonted tempest of
+excitement when my jolly skipper, Sheikh Abdul Rehman, came in and told
+me briefly that a "bag" (which word does not rhyme with rag, but must
+be pronounced like barg without the <i>r</i> and signifies a tiger or
+panther) had killed a cow in the village the night before last.
+</p>
+<p>
+When he added that the villagers had set a spring gun for it last
+evening and it had returned to the "kill" and been badly wounded, my
+excitement was turned into wrath. I had been at anchor here all
+yesterday. The Indian ryot everywhere turns instinctively to the <i>sahib</i>
+as his protector against all wild beasts. What did these men mean by
+keeping their own counsel and setting an infernal machine for their
+enemy? Abdul Rehman explained, and the explanation was simple and
+sufficient. My fat predecessor in the appointment that I held had no
+relish for sport and kept no guns, so the simple villagers, when they
+saw my boat with its familiar flag, looked for no help from that
+quarter. However, I might still win renown off that wounded "bag," if it
+was not a myth; but, to tell the truth, I was sceptical. The tiger and
+the panther are not nomads on rocky plains, like the antelope. I landed,
+notwithstanding, promptly and visited the scene. Sure enough, there was
+a young heifer lying on its side, with the unmistakable deep pits where
+the jaws of the panther had gripped its throat, and a gory cavity where
+it had selected a gigot for its dinner.
+</p>
+<p>
+Round the corpse the villagers had arranged a circular fence of thorns,
+with one opening, across which they had stretched a cord, attached at
+the other end to the trigger of an old shooting iron of some sort,
+charged with slugs and looking hard at the opening. The gun had gone off
+during the night, and the ground was soaked with blood. A few yards off
+there was another great swamp of blood. The beast had staggered away and
+lain down for a while, faint and sick. Then it had got up and crawled
+home, still dripping with blood, by which we tracked it for a good
+distance, but the trace grew gradually fainter and at last ceased
+altogether.
+</p>
+<p>
+"It has gone to the fort," said the men&mdash;"bags always go to the fort." I
+pointed out that, if it had meant to go to the fort, it would have gone
+towards the fort, instead of in another direction; but the argument did
+not move them. "The fort is a jungle, and where else should a 'bag' take
+refuge but in a jungle?" However, I was obstinate, and pursued the
+original direction until we arrived at the brow of the hill, where it
+sloped steeply down to the sea. The whole slope, for half a mile, was
+covered with a dense scrub of Lantana bushes. This is another plant
+introduced in some by-gone century from South America, and planted first
+in gardens for its profuse clusters of red and pink verbena-like
+blossoms (it is a near relation of the garden verbena), whence it has
+spread like the rabbit in New Zealand, and become a nuisance. "There," I
+cried, pointing at the scrub, "there, without doubt, your wounded 'bag'
+is lying."
+</p>
+<p>
+Some of the men, unbelieving still, were amusing themselves by rolling
+large stones down the slope, when suddenly there was a sound of
+scrambling, and across an opening in the scrub, in sight of us all, a
+huge hyaena scurried away "on three legs." I sent a man post-haste for
+my rifle, which I had not brought with me, never expecting to require it
+until a regular campaign could be arranged. As soon as it arrived, we
+formed in line and advanced, throwing stones in all directions.
+</p>
+<p>
+Make no offering of admiration at the shrine of our hardihood, for we
+were in no peril. Among carnivorous beasts there is not a more
+contemptible poltroon than the hyaena, even when wounded. A friend of
+mine once tied up a billy goat as a bait for a panther and sat up over
+it in a tree. In the middle of the night a hyaena nosed it from afar,
+and came sneaking up in the rear, for hyaenas love the flesh of goats
+next to that of dogs. But the goat saw it, and, turning about bravely,
+presented his horned front. This the hyaena could not find stomach to
+face. For two hours he manoeuvred to take the goat in rear, but it
+turned as he circled, and stood up to him stoutly till the dawn came,
+and my friend cut short its disreputable career with a bullet.
+</p>
+<p>
+To return to my story, we had not gone far when, on a lower level, not
+many yards from me, I was suddenly confronted by that repulsive,
+ghoulish physiognomy which can never be forgotten when once seen, the
+smoky-black snout, broad forehead and great upstanding ears. Instantly
+the beast wheeled and scrambled over a bank, receiving a hasty rear
+shot which, as I afterwards found, left it but one limb to go with, for
+the bullet passed clean through a hindleg and lodged in a foreleg. It
+went on, however, and some time passed before I descried it far off
+dragging itself painfully across an open space. A careful shot finished
+it, and it died under a thick bush, where we found it and dragged it
+out. It proved to be a large male, measuring 4 feet 7 inches, from which
+something over a foot must be deducted for its shabby tail.
+</p>
+<p>
+The natives all maintained still that their cow had been killed by a
+panther, saying that the hyaena had come on the second night, after
+their manner, to fill its base belly with the leavings. And there was
+some circumstantial evidence in favour of this view. In the first place,
+I never heard of a hyaena having the audacity to attack a cow; in the
+second, the tooth-marks on the cow showed that it had been executed
+according to the tradition of all the great cats&mdash;by seizing its throat
+and breaking its neck; and in the third, a hyaena, sitting down to such
+a meal, would certainly have begun with calf's head and crunched up
+every bone of the skull before thinking of sirloin or rumpsteak. But the
+absurdity of a panther being found in such a region outweighed all this
+and I scoffed.
+</p>
+<p>
+I was yet to learn a lesson in humility out of this adventure. Two years
+later I sailed over the bar and dropped anchor at the same spot. I was
+met with the intelligence that on the previous evening two panthers had
+been seen sitting on the brow of the hill and gazing at the beauties of
+the fading sunset, as wild beasts are so fond of doing. A night or two
+later a cow was attacked in a neighbouring field, and, staggering into
+the village, fell down and died in a narrow alley between two houses.
+The panther followed and prowled about all night, but the villagers,
+hammering at their doors with sticks, scared it from its meal.
+</p>
+<p>
+I at once had a nest put up in a small tree, and took my position in it
+at sunset. The common people in India do not waste much money on lamp
+oil, preferring to sleep during the hours appointed by Nature for the
+purpose, so it was not long before all doors were securely barred and
+quietness reigned. Then the mosquitoes awoke and came to inquire for me,
+the little bats (how I blessed them!) wheeled about my head, the
+night-jar called to his fellow, and the little owls sat on a branch
+together and talked to each other about me. Hour after hour passed, and
+it became too dark in that narrow alley to see a panther if it had come.
+So I came down and got to my boat. The panther was engaged a mile away
+dining on another cow! On further inquiry I learned that there was some
+good forest a day's journey distant, and it was quite the fashion among
+the panthers of that place to spend a weekend occasionally at a spot so
+full of all delights as this dark, jungle-smothered fort.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_13"><!-- RULE4 13 --></a>
+<h2>
+ XIV
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+THE PURBHOO
+</center>
+<p>
+I do not believe that the Member of Parliament who moved the adjournment
+of the House to consider the culpable carelessness of the Government of
+India in allowing the Rajah of Muttighur to fall into the moat of his
+own castle when he was drunk, could have told you what a Purbhoo is, not
+though you had spelled it Prabhu, so that he could find it in his
+<i>Gazetteer</i>. Of course he saw hundreds of them during that Christmas
+which he spent in the East before he wrote his book; but then he took
+them all for Brahmins. He never noticed that the curve of their turbans
+was not the same, and the idol mark on their foreheads was quite
+different, nor even that their shoes were not forked at the toes, but
+ended in a sharp point curled upwards. And if he did not see these
+things which were on the surface, what could he know of matters that lie
+deeper?
+</p>
+<p>
+Now the first and most important thing to be known respecting the
+Purbhoo, the fundamental fact of him, is that he is not a Brahmin. If he
+were a Brahmin, one essential piece of our administrative apparatus in
+India would be wanting, and without it the whole machinery would
+assuredly go out of order. Nor is it easy to see how we could replace
+him. Not one of the other castes would serve even as a makeshift. They
+are all too far removed from the Brahmin. But the Purbhoo is near him,
+irritatingly near him, and he has proved in practice to be just the sort
+of homoeopathic remedy we require, the counter-irritant, the outward
+blister by wise application of which we can keep down the internal
+inflammation.
+</p>
+<p>
+In speaking of the Brahmin as an inflammation in the body politic I
+disown all offensive and invidious implications. I am only using a
+convenient simile. You may reverse it if you like and make the disease
+stand for the Purbhoo, in which case the Brahmin will be the blister.
+Which way fits the facts best will depend upon which caste chances at
+the time to be nearest to the vitals of Government.
+</p>
+<p>
+The case stands thus. Before the days of British rule the Brahmin was
+the priest and man of letters, the "clerke" in short. The rajahs and
+chiefs were much of the same mind as old Douglas:
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p>Thanks to Saint Bothan son of mine,</p>
+ <p>Save Gawain, ne'er could pen a line,</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+Gawain being a bishop. As a Mohammedan gentleman related to one of the
+ruling Indian princes put the matter when speaking to me a few years
+ago, "In those days none of us could write. Our pen was the sword. If
+any writing had to be done the Brahmin was called in." And no doubt he
+did excellent service, being diligent, astute, and withal pliant and
+diplomatic. If to these qualities he added ambition, he might, and often
+did, become a Cardinal Wolsey in the state. In Poona, for example, the
+Brahmin Prime Minister gradually overshadowed the Mahratta king, and the
+descendant of Shivajee was put on a back shelf as Rajah of Sattara,
+while the Peishwa ruled at the capital.
+</p>
+<p>
+Of course this carnal advancement was not gained without some sacrifice
+of his spiritual character, and the "secular" Brahmin had to bow, <i>quoad
+sacra</i>, to the penniless Bhut, or "regular" Brahmin, who, refusing to
+contaminate his sanctity by doing any kind of work, ate of the temple,
+or lived by royal bounty or private charity, and by the free breakfasts
+without which a marriage, "thread ceremony" or funeral in a gentleman's
+house could not be respectably celebrated. Idleness and sanctity are a
+powerful combination, and it is written in the <i>shastras</i> that every day
+in which a holy man does no work for his bread, but lives by begging, is
+equal in the eyes of the gods to a day spent in fasting; so, though the
+prospect of power and wealth might tempt a few restless and wayward
+spirits, the great mass of the Brahmin caste clung to the sacred
+calling.
+</p>
+<p>
+All this time the Purbhoo was in the land, but insignificant. He had no
+sacred calling. Tradition assigned him a hybrid origin. He could not
+presume to be a warrior, because his mother was a <i>shoodra</i>, nor could
+he condescend to be a farmer, for his father was a <i>kshutriya</i>. So the
+gods had given him the pen, and he was a writer&mdash;not a secretary, but a
+humble quill-driver. But when the Portuguese and then the British came
+upon the scene, not ruling by word of mouth, like the native rajahs, but
+inditing their orders and keeping records, the Purbhoo saw an open door
+and went in.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then the Brahmin woke up, for he saw that he was in evil case. The
+spirit of the British <i>raj</i> was falling like a blight and a pestilence
+upon the means by which he had lived, drying up the fountains of
+religious revenue and slowly but surely blighting the luxuriance of that
+pious liberality which always took the form of feeding holy men. He
+found that he must work for his bread whether he liked it or not, and
+the only implement of secular work that would not soil his priestly hand
+was the pen. And this was already taken up by the Purbhoo, who carried
+himself haughtily under the new <i>regime</i> and showed no mind to make way
+for the holier man. Hence sprang those bitter enmities and jealousies
+which have done so much to lighten the difficulties of our position.
+</p>
+<p>
+The British Government has often been accused of acting on the maxim,
+<i>Divide et impera</i>. It is a libel. We do not divide, for there is no
+need. Division is already there. We have only to rejoice and rule. How
+well and justly we rule all the world knows, but only the initiated know
+how much we owe to the fact that the talents and energies which would
+otherwise be employed in thwarting our just intentions and
+phlebotomising the ryot are largely preoccupied with the more useful
+work of thwarting and undermining each other.
+</p>
+<p>
+What could a collector do single-handed against a host of clerks and
+subordinate magistrates and petty officials of every grade, all armed
+with the awfulness of a heaven-born sanctity, all hedged round with the
+prestige of an ancient supremacy, endowed with a mole-like genius for
+underground work which the Englishman never fathoms, and all leagued
+together to suck to the uttermost the life blood of those inferior
+castes which were created expressly for their advantage?
+</p>
+<p>
+<i>He</i> is working in a foreign language, among customs and ways of thought
+which it takes a lifetime to understand: <i>they</i> are using their mother
+tongue and handling matters that they have known from childhood. <i>He</i>
+cannot tell a lie and is ashamed to deceive: <i>they</i> are trained in a
+thrifty policy which saves the truth for a last resort in case
+everything else should fail. He would be helpless in their hands as a
+sucking child. But he knows they will do for him what he cannot do for
+himself. The Purbhoo will lie in wait for the Brahmin, and the Brahmin
+will keep his lynx eye on the Purbhoo. And woe to the one who trips
+first. So the collector arranges his men with judicious skill to the
+fostering of each other's virtue, and the result is most gratifying.
+The country blesses his administration, and his subordinates are equally
+surprised and delighted at their own integrity.
+</p>
+<p>
+I speak of a wise and able administrator. There are men in the Indian
+Civil Service who are neither wise nor able, and some who are not
+administrators at all, having most unhappily mistaken their vocation.
+When such a one becomes collector of a district his <i>chitnis</i>, or chief
+secretary, sees that that tide in the affairs of men has come which,
+"taken at the flood, leads on to fortune," and his caste-fellows all
+through the service are filled with unholy joy. But he does nothing rash
+or hasty. Wilily and patiently he goes to work to make his own
+foundation sure first of all. He studies his chief under all conditions,
+discovers his little foibles and vanities and feeds them sedulously. He
+masters codes, rules and regulations, standing orders, precedents and
+past correspondence, till it is dangerous to contradict him and always
+safe to trust him. In every difficulty he is at hand, clearing away
+perplexity and refreshing the "swithering" mind with his precision and
+assurance. He becomes indispensable. The collector reposes absolute
+confidence in him and is proud to say so in his reports.
+</p>
+<p>
+Then the <i>chitnis</i>, if he is a Brahmin, addresses himself to the task of
+eliminating the Purbhoo from the service, or at least depriving him of
+place and power. It is a delicate task, but the Brahmin's touch is
+light. He never disparages a Purbhoo from that day; "damning with faint
+praise" is safer and as effectual. He practises the charity which
+covereth a multitude of faults, but he leaves a tag end of one peeping
+out to attract curiosity, and if the collector asks questions, he is
+candid and tells the truth, though with manifest reluctance. Then he
+grapples with the gradation lists, which have fallen into confusion, and
+puts them into such excellent order that the collector can see at a
+glance every man's past services and present claims to promotion. And
+from these lists it appears that clearly, whenever any vacancy has to be
+filled, a Brahmin has the first claim. And so, as the shades of night
+yield to the dawn of day, the Purbhoo by degrees fades away and
+disappears, and the star of the Brahmin rises and shines everywhere with
+still increasing splendour.
+</p>
+<p>
+But the Purbhoo possesses his soul in patience, and keeps a note of
+every slip that the Brahmin makes. For the next <i>chitnis</i> may be a
+Purbhoo, and then the day of reckoning will come and old scores will be
+paid off. The Brahmin knows that too, and the thought of it makes him
+walk warily even in the day of his prosperity. Thus our administration
+is saved from utter corruption.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_14"><!-- RULE4 14 --></a>
+<h2>
+ XV
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+THE COCONUT TREE
+</center>
+<p>
+Among the classic fairy-tales which passed like shooting stars across
+those dark hours of our boyhood in which we wrestled with the grim
+rudiments of Latin and Greek, and which abide in the memory after nearly
+all that they helped to brighten has passed away, there was one which
+related to a contest between Neptune and Minerva as to which should
+confer the greatest benefit on the human race. Neptune first struck his
+trident on the ground (or was it on the waves? "Eheu fugaces"&mdash;no, that
+also is gone), and there sprang forth a noble steed, pawing the ground,
+terrible in war and no less useful in peace. Then the watery god leaned
+back and smiled as if he would say, "Now, beat that." But the Goddess of
+Wisdom brought out of the earth a modest, dark tree bearing olives and,
+in classic phrase, "took the cake," Oriental mythology is more luxuriant
+and fantastic than that of the West, but I do not know if it has any
+legend parallel to this. If it has, then I am sure the palm is awarded
+to the deity who gave to the human race the tree that bears the coconut.
+</p>
+<p>
+Passing a confectioner's shop, I saw a tempting packet labelled
+"Cokernut Toffee." I bought a pennyworth and gave it to my little girl,
+and
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p> "I laye a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge."</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+How many boys and girls are there in this kingdom to whom the word
+coconut connotes an ingredient which goes to the making of a very
+toothsome sweetie? And how many confectioners and shop girls are there
+whose idea is no broader? Again:
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p>"I laye a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge,</p>
+ <p>And merrie sang the Birde as she sat upon the spraye."</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+And I said, "Little Bird, what do you know of the coconut?" And it made
+answer, "It is a cup full of food, rich and sweet, which kind hands hang
+out for me in winter," How narrow may be the key-hole through which we
+take our outlook on things human and divine, never doubting that we see
+the whole! In our own British Empire, only a few thousand miles away,
+sits a mild Hindu, almost unclad and wholly unlettered, to whom the tree
+that bore the fruit that flavoured the toffee that my little girl is
+enjoying seems to be one of the predominating tints of the whole
+landscape of life. It puts a roof over his head, it lightens his
+darkness, it helps to feed his body, it furnishes the wine that maketh
+glad his heart and the oil that causeth his face to shine, and time
+would fail me to tell of all the other things that it does for him. As a
+type and symbol, it is always about him, spanning the sunshine and
+shower of life with bows of hope.
+</p>
+<p>
+The coconut tree is a palm, and has nothing to do with cocoa of the
+breakfast table. That word is a perversion of "cacao," and came to us
+from Mexico: the other is the Portuguese word "coco," which means a nut.
+It is what Vasco da Gama called the thing when he first saw it, and the
+word, with our English translation added, has stuck to it. The tree is,
+I need scarcely say, a palm, one of many kinds that flourish in India.
+But none of them can be ranked with it. The rough date palm makes dense
+groves on sandy plains, but brings no fruit to perfection, pining for
+something which only Arabia can supply; the strong but unprofitable
+"brab," or fan palm, rises on rocky hills, the beautiful fish-tailed
+palm in forests solitarily, while the "areca" rears its tall, smooth
+stem and delicate head in gardens and supplies millions with a solace
+more indispensable than tobacco or tea. But the coconut loves a sandy
+soil and the salt breath of the sea and the company of its own kind. The
+others grow erect as a mast, but the gentle coconuts lean on the wind
+and mingle the waving of their sisterly arms, casting a grateful shade
+on the humble folk who live under their blessing.
+</p>
+<p>
+To the mariner sailing by India's coral strand that country presents the
+aspect of an endless beach of shell sand, quite innocent of coral, on
+which the surf breaks continually into dazzling white foam against a
+dark background of pensive palms. He might naturally suppose that they
+had grown up of themselves, like the screw-pines and aloes which
+sometimes share the beach with them; but that would be a great mistake.
+Everyone of them has been planted and carefully watered for years and
+manured annually with fresh foliage of forest trees buried in a moat
+round the root. And so it grew in stature, but not in girth, until its
+head was sixty, seventy or even eighty feet above the ground, and a
+hundred nuts of various sizes hung in bunches from long, shiny, green
+arms, each as thick as a man's, which had thrust themselves out from
+between the lower fronds.
+</p>
+<p>
+There is no production of Nature that I know of less negotiable than a
+coconut as the tree presents it. The man who first showed the way into
+it deserved a place in mythology with Prometheus, Jason and other heroes
+of the dawn. There is a crab, I know, which lives on coconuts, enjoying
+the scientific name of <i>Birgus latro</i>, the Burglar; but it seems to be a
+special invention, as big as a cat and armed with two fearful pairs of
+pincers in front for rending the outside casings of the fruits, and a
+more delicate tool on its hind-legs for picking out the meat. Other
+animals have to do without it, as had man, I opine, in the stone and
+copper ages. With the iron age came a chopper, called in Western India a
+"koita," with which he can hack his way through most of the obstructions
+of life. When, with this, he has slashed off the tough outer rind and
+the inch-thick packing of agglutinated fibres, like metal wires, he has
+only to crack the hard shell which contains the kernel.
+</p>
+<p>
+How little we can conceive the spaces in his life that would be empty
+without that firm pulp, at once nutritious, sweet and fragrant! Curry
+cannot be made without it, the cook cannot advance three steps in its
+absence, pattimars laden with it are sailing north, south, east and
+west, a thousand creaky wooden mills are squeezing the limpid oil out of
+it, a hundred thousand little earthen lamps filled with that oil are
+making visible the smoky darkness of hut and temple, brightening the
+wedding feast and illuminating the sad page over which the candidate for
+university honours nods his shaven head. That oil fed lighthouses of the
+first order and illuminated viceregal balls and durbars before paraffin
+and kerosene inundated the earth. And it has other uses. For arresting
+premature baldness and preventing the hair turning grey its virtues are
+equalled by no other oil known to us, and there is a fortune awaiting
+the hairdresser who can find means effectually to remove or suppress its
+peculiar and penetrating odour. Joao Gomez, my faithful "boy," did not
+object to the odour, and when he had been tempted to pass my comb
+through his raven locks as he was dusting my dressing table, I always
+knew it.
+</p>
+<p>
+When the white kernel has been turned to account, the utilities of the
+coconut are not exhausted. The shell, neatly bisected, makes a pair of
+teacups, and either of these, fitted with a wooden handle, makes a handy
+spoon. Laurenco de Gama demands one or two of these inexpensive spoons
+to complete the furnishing of my kitchen. As for the obstinate casing
+that wraps the coconut shell, it is an article of commerce. It must
+first be soaked for some months in a pit on the slimy bank of the
+backwater, until all the stuff that holds it together in a stiff and
+obdurate mass has rotted away and set free those hard and smooth fibres
+which nothing can rot. These, when thoroughly purged of the foul black
+pollution in which they have sweltered so long, will go out to all
+quarters of the world under the name of "coir" to make indestructible
+door mats and other indispensable things. It will penetrate to every
+corner of India in which a white man lives, to mat his verandahs and
+stuff his mattresses.
+</p>
+<p>
+And who shall recount a tithe of its other uses? Of course, the nude man
+under the coconut tree knows nothing of all this. He does without a
+mattress, and has no use for a door mat. But he cannot do without
+cordage, and if you took from him his coconut fibre, life would almost
+stop. Wherewith would he bind the rafters of his hut to the beams, or
+tether the cow, or let down the bucket into the well? What would all the
+boats do that traverse the backwater, or lie at anchor in the bay, or
+line the sandy beach? From the cable of the great pattimar, now getting
+under weigh for the Persian Gulf with a cargo of coconuts, to the
+painter of the dugout, "hodee," every yard of cordage about them is made
+of imperishable coir.
+</p>
+<p>
+When the axe is at last laid to the old coconut tree, a beam will fall
+to the earth sixty feet in length, hard as teak and already rounded and
+smoothed. True, you cannot saw it into planks, but no one will complain
+of that in a village which does not own a saw. It cleaves readily enough
+and straightly, forming long troughs most useful for leading water from
+the well to the plantation and for many other purposes. It can also be
+chopped into lengths suitable for the ridge poles of the hut, or for
+bridges to span the deep ditches which drain the rice fields or feed the
+salt pans. When out in quest of snipe I have sometimes had to choose
+between crossing by one of those bridges, innocent of even a handrail,
+and wading through the black slough of despond which it spanned.
+Choosing neither, I went home, but the "Kolee" and the "Agree" trip over
+them like birds, balancing household chattels on their steady heads.
+</p>
+<p>
+We must not think, however, of the trunk as, at the best, anything more
+than a by-product of the coconut tree, whose head is more than its body.
+Even while it lives its head is shorn once a year, for, as fresh fronds
+push out and upward from the centre, those of the outer circle get old
+and must be cut away. And when one of those feathery, fern-like fronds,
+toying with the breeze, comes crashing to the ground, it is ten or
+twelve feet long, and consists of a great backbone, as thick at the base
+as a man's leg, with a close-set row of swords on either side, about a
+yard in length. They are hard and tough, but supple yet and of a shiny
+green colour; but they will turn to brown as they wither.
+</p>
+<p>
+Now observe that this gigantic, unmanageable-looking leaf, like
+everything else about the coconut tree, is almost a ready-made article,
+demanding no machinery to turn it to account, except the "koita" which
+hangs ever ready from the nude man's girdle. With it he will cleave the
+backbone lengthwise, and then, taking each half separately, he will
+simply twist backwards every second sword and plait them all into a mat
+two feet wide, eight or ten feet long, and firmly bounded and held
+together on one side by the unbreakable backbone. This is a "jaolee,"
+lighter than slates, or tiles, and more handy than any form of thatch.
+You have just to arrange your "jaolees" neatly on your bamboo frame,
+each overlapping the one below it, then tie them securely in their
+places with coir rope and your roof is made for a year.
+</p>
+<p>
+There is yet another benevolence of the coconut tree which I have left
+to the last, and the simple folk of whom I am trying to write with
+fellow feeling would certainly have named it first. I ought to refer to
+it as a curse: they, without qualm or question, call it a blessing. Let
+me try to describe it dispassionately. If you wander in any palm grove
+in Western India, looking upward, it will soon strike you that a large
+number of the trees do not seem to bear coconuts at all, but black
+earthen pots. If your visit should chance to be made early in the
+morning, or late in the afternoon, the mystery will soon be revealed.
+You will see a dusky, sinewy figure, not of a monkey, but of a man,
+ascending and descending those trees with marvellous celerity and ease,
+grasping the trunks with his hands and fitting his naked feet into
+slight notches cut in them. The distance between the notches is so great
+that his knee goes up to his chin at each step, but he is as supple as
+he is sinewy and feels no inconvenience. For he is a Bhundaree, or
+Toddy-drawer, and his forefathers have been Bhundarees since the time, I
+suppose, when Manu made his immortal laws.
+</p>
+<p>
+His waistcloth is tightly girded about him, in his hand he carries a
+broad billhook as bright and keen as a razor, and from his caudal region
+depends a tail more strange than any borne by beast or reptile. It looks
+like a large brown pot, constructed in the middle. It is, in fact, a
+large gourd, or calabash, hanging by a hook from the climber's
+waistband. When he has reached the top of a tree, he gets among the
+branches and, sitting astride of one of them, proceeds to detach one of
+the black pots from the stout fruit stem on which it is fastened, and
+empty its contents into his tail. Then, taking his billhook, he
+carefully pares the raw end of the stem, refastens the black pot in its
+place and hurries down to make the ascent of another tree, and so on
+until his tail is full of a foaming white liquor spotted with drowned
+honey bees and filling the surrounding air with a rank odour of
+fermentation. This liquor is "toddy."
+</p>
+<p>
+If I were a Darwin I would not leave that word until I had traced the
+agencies which wafted it over sea and land from the shores of Hindustan
+to the Scottish coast, where it first took root and, quickly adapting
+itself to a strange environment, developed into a new and vigorous
+species, spread like the thistle and became a national institution. At
+first it was only the Briton's way of mouthing a common native word,
+"tadi" (pronounced ta-dee), which meant palm juice; but it became
+current in its present shape as early as 1673, when the traveller Fryer
+wrote of "the natives singing and roaring all night long, being drunk
+with toddy, the wine of the cocoe." About a century later Burns sang,
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p>The lads and lasses, blythely bent,</p>
+ <p>To mind baith saul and body,</p>
+ <p>Sit round the table, weel content,</p>
+ <p>And steer about the toddy.</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+Between these I can find no vestigia, but imagination easily fills the
+gap. I see a company of jovial Scots, met in Calcutta, or Surat, on St.
+Andrew's Day. European wines and beer are expensive, whisky not
+obtainable at all; but the skilful khansamah makes up a punch with toddy
+spirit, hot water, sugar and limes, and they are "well content." After
+many years I see the few of them who still survive foregathered again in
+the old country, and one proposes to have a good brew of toddy for auld
+lang syne. If real toddy spirit cannot be had, what of that? Whisky is
+found to take very kindly to hot water and sugar and limes, and the old
+folks at home and the neighbours and the minister himself pronounce a
+most favourable verdict on "toddy." In short, it has come to stay. But
+we must return to the liquor in the Bhundaree's gourd. It is the rich
+sap which should have gone to the forming of coconuts, which is
+intercepted by cutting off the point of the fruit stalk and tying on an
+earthen pot. If the pot is clean, the juice, when it is taken down in
+the morning, not fermented yet but just beginning to sparkle with minute
+bubbles, not too sweet and not so oily as the milk of the coconut, is
+nectar to a hot and thirsty soul. No summer drink have I drunk so
+innocently restorative after a hot and toilsome march on a broiling May
+morning. But the Bhundaree will not squander it so: he takes care not to
+clean his pots, and when he takes them down in the morning the liquor is
+already foaming like London stout. Not that he means to drink it
+himself, for you must know that, by the rules of his caste, he is a
+total abstainer, being a Bhundaree, whose function is to draw toddy, not
+to drink it. This is one of those profound institutes by which the
+wisdom of the ancients fenced the whole social system of this strange
+land.
+</p>
+<p>
+But, while the Bhundaree must refuse all intoxicating drinks himself, it
+is his duty to exercise a large tolerance towards those who are not so
+hindered. He is, in fact, a partner in the business of Babajee, Licensed
+Vendor of Fresh Toddy, towards whose spacious, open-fronted shop,
+thatched with "jaolees," he now carries his gourds. There the contents
+will stand, in dirty vessels and a warm place, maturing their
+exhilarating qualities until the evening, when the Tam o' Shanters and
+Souter Johnnies of the village begin to assemble and squat in a ring in
+the open space in front. They may be Kolees, or fishermen, and Agrees,
+who make salt, and aboriginal Katkurrees from the jungle, with their
+bows and arrows, most bibulous of all, but among them all there will be
+no Bhundaree. Babajee sits apart, presiding and serving, beside a dirty
+table, on which are many bottles and dirty tumblers of patterns which
+were on our tables thirty years ago. The assembly begins solemnly,
+discussing social problems and bartering village gossip, for the Hindu
+is by nature staid. After a while, at the second bottle perhaps,
+cheerfulness will supervene, then mirth and garrulity, ending, as the
+night closes round, with wordy contention and a general brawl. But
+nothing serious will happen, for toddy, though decidedly heady, is at
+the worst a thin potation. A strong and very pure spirit is distilled
+from it, which has its devotees, but the rustic, as a rule, prefers
+quantity to quality. We are often told that the British Government
+taught the people of India to drink, but the scene that I have tried to
+describe is indigenous conviviality, much older than any European
+connection with the country.
+</p>
+<p>
+Is it any wonder that the coconut has become an emblem of fertility and
+prosperity and all good luck? When a new house is building you will see
+a high pole over the doorway, bearing coconuts at the top, with an
+umbrella spread over them. Do not ask the owner the meaning of the sign,
+for he does not know. He does not think about such matters, but he feels
+about them and he knows that that is the right thing to do. Besides, he
+might ask you why you nail a horseshoe over your door. The difference
+between us and him is that we do such things in jest, no longer
+believing in them. They are the husks of a dead faith with us. But the
+Hindu's faith is very living still. So, when he breaks a coconut at the
+launching of a pattimar, he is a gainer in hope, if nothing else; while
+we squander our champagne and gain nothing. That nut follows him even to
+the grave, or burning ground, with mystic significances which I cannot
+explain. I have been told that, when a very holy man dies, who always
+clothed himself in ashes and never profaned his hands with work, his
+disciples sometimes break a coconut over his head. If the spirit can
+escape from the body through the sutures of the skull instead of by any
+of the other orifices, it is believed to find a more direct route to
+heaven, so the purpose of this ceremony may be to facilitate its exit
+that way. In that case the breaking of the nut is perhaps only an
+accident, due to its not being so hard as the holy man's skull.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_15"><!-- RULE4 15 --></a>
+<h2>
+ XVI
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+THE BETEL NUT
+</center>
+<p>
+One half the world does not know how the other half lives. Noticing a
+pot of areca nut toothpaste on a chemist's counter, I asked him what the
+peculiar properties of the areca nut were&mdash;in short, what was it good
+for. He replied that it was an astringent and acted beneficially on the
+gums, but he had never heard that it was used for any other purpose than
+the manufacture of an elegant dentifrice. I felt inclined to question
+him about the camel in order to see whether he would tell me that it was
+a tropical animal, chiefly noted for the fine quality of its hair, from
+which artist's brushes were made. Here was a man whose special business
+it is to know the properties and uses of all drugs and their action on
+the human system, and he had not the faintest notion that there are
+nearly 300 millions of His Majesty's subjects, and many millions more
+beyond his empire, who could scarcely think of life as a thing to be
+desired if they were obliged to go through it without the areca nut. For
+the areca nut is the betel nut.
+</p>
+<p>
+In the Canarese language and the kindred dialects of Malabar it is
+called by a name which is rendered as <i>adike</i>, or <i>adika</i>, in scientific
+books, but would stand more chance of being correctly pronounced by the
+average Englishman if it were spelled <i>uddiky</i>. The coast districts of
+Canara and Malabar being famed for their betel nuts, the trade name of
+the article was taken from the languages current there, and was tortured
+by the Portuguese into <i>areca</i>. Over the greater part of India the
+natives use the Hindustanee name <i>supari</i>, but by Englishmen it is best
+known as the betel nut, because it is always found in company with the
+betel leaf, with which, however, it has no more connection than
+strawberries have with cream. The one is the leaf of a kind of pepper
+vine, and the other is the seed, or nut, of a palm. But nature and man
+have combined to marry them to one another, and it is difficult to think
+of them separately.
+</p>
+<p>
+In life the betel vine climbs up the stem of the areca palm, and in
+death the areca nut is rolled in a shroud of the betel leaf and the two
+are munched together. Other things are often added to the morsel, such
+as a clove, a cardamom, or a pinch of tobacco, and a small quantity of
+fresh lime is indispensable.
+</p>
+<p>
+What is the precise nature of the consolation derived from the chewing
+of this mixture it is not easy to say. Outwardly it produces effects
+which are visible enough, to wit, a most copious flow of saliva, which
+is dyed deep red by the juice of the nut, so that a betel nut chewer
+seems to go about spitting blood all the day. As every Hindu is a betel
+nut chewer, those 943,903 superficial miles of country which make up our
+Indian Empire must be bespattered to a degree which it dizzies the mind
+to contemplate. This is one of the difficulties of Indian
+administration. In large towns and centres of business it is found
+necessary to fortify the public buildings in various ways. The Custom
+House in Bombay has the wall painted with dark red ochre to a height of
+three or four feet from the ground.
+</p>
+<p>
+But these are the outward results. What is the inwardness of the thing?
+In a word, why do the people chew betel nut? Surely not that they may
+spit on our public buildings. That is a chance result, not sought for
+and not shunned. There is, of course, some deeper reason. Early
+travellers in India were much exercised about this and used to question
+the people, from whom they got some curious explanations. One reports,
+"They say they do it to comfort the heart, nor could live without it."
+Another says, "It bites in the mouth, accords rheume, cooles the head,
+strengthens the teeth and is all their phisicke." A Latin writer gets
+quite eloquent. "<i>Ex ea mansione</i>"&mdash;by that chewing&mdash;he says, "mire
+recreantur, et ad labores tolerandos et ad languores discutiendos."
+</p>
+<p>
+But the remarkable thing is that the betel nut has these effects only on
+the Hindu constitution. To a European the strong, astringent taste and
+penetrating odour of the betel nut are alike insufferable, and there is
+no instance on record, as far as I know, of an Englishman becoming a
+betel nut chewer. But wherever Hindu blood circulates, not in India
+only, but all through the islands of the Malay Archipelago, as far as
+the Philippines, the betel nut is an indispensable ingredient of any
+life that is worth living. Mohammedanism forbids spirits and Brahminism
+condemns all things that intoxicate or stupefy, but the betel nut is
+like the cup that cheers yet not inebriates. No religion speaks
+disrespectfully of it. It flourishes, blessed by all, and takes its
+place among the institutions of civilisation. Indeed it is the chief
+cement of social intercourse in a country where all ordinary
+conviviality between man and man is almost strangled by the quarantine
+enforced against ceremonial defilement. Friend offers friend the betel
+nut box just as Scotsmen offered the snuff-box in the hearty old days
+that are passing away. And all visits of ceremony, durbars, receptions,
+leave-takings, and public functions of the like kind are brought to an
+august close by the distribution of <i>pan supari</i>. To go through this
+rite without visible repugnance is part of the training of our young
+Civil Servants. When the interview or ceremony has lasted as long as it
+was intended to last, there enter, with due pomp, bearers of
+heavy-scented garlands, woven of jasmine and marigold, and in form like
+the muffs and boas that ladies wear in winter. These are put upon the
+necks and wrists of the guests in order of rank. Silver vases and
+sprinklers follow, containing rose-water and attar of roses. You may
+ward off the former from your person by offering your handkerchief for
+it, and you may present the back of your hand for the latter, of which
+one drop will be applied to your skin with a tiny silver or golden
+spoon.
+</p>
+<p>
+Finally, when everybody is reeking with incongruous odours and trying
+not to be sick, a silver tray appears with the daintiest little packets
+of <i>pan supari</i>, each pinned with a clove, and every guest is expected
+to transfer one to his mouth, for they have been prepared by a Brahmin
+and cannot hurt the most delicate caste. To an Englishman, however, it
+is now generally conceded to compromise by keeping the morsel in his
+hand, as if waiting an opportunity to enjoy it more at his leisure. When
+you get home your servant craves it of you and contrasts real rajah's
+<i>pan supari</i> with the stuff which the poor man gets in the bazaar.
+</p>
+<p>
+The chewing of betel nut requires more apparatus and makes greater
+demands on a man's time and personal care than the smoking of tobacco or
+any of the allied vices. To cut the nut neatly an instrument is used
+like an enormous pair of nutcrackers with a sharp cutting edge. The lime
+should be made from oyster shells and it must be freshly burned and
+slaked. Exposure to the air soon spoils it, so a small, air-tight tin
+box is required to keep it in. Lastly, the betel leaf must be fresh,
+and in a hot climate green leaves do not keep their freshness without
+special care.
+</p>
+<p>
+But the necessity for attending to all these matters no doubt adds
+greatly to the interest which a chewer of <i>pan supari</i> is able to find
+in life. Moreover, his taste and wealth have scope for expression in the
+elegance of his appointments, and by these you may generally judge of a
+man's rank and means. A well-to-do Mahratta cartman will carry in his
+waistband a sort of bijou hold-all of coloured cloth, which, when
+unrolled, displays neat pockets of different forms for the leaves,
+broken nuts, lime box, spices, etc.; but a native magistrate, who goes
+about attended by a peon and need not carry his own things, will have a
+box of polished brass, or even silver, divided into compartments.
+</p>
+<p>
+One may easily infer that to meet such a universal want there must be a
+correspondingly great industry, and the cultivation of the betel nut is
+indeed a great industry, and a most beautiful one. Surely since Adam
+first began to till the ground in the sweat of his face, his children
+have found no tillage so Eden-like as this. India has produced no Virgil
+to take the common charms of a farmer's life and put them into immortal
+song, so we search her literature in vain to learn how her simple,
+rustic people feel about these things, and in what we see of their life
+there is little sign that they feel about them at all; but when the
+Englishman, wandering, gun in hand, up a steaming valley among
+forest-clad hills, suddenly finds the path lead him into a betel nut
+garden, with no wire fence, or locked gate, or inhospitable notice
+threatening prosecution to trespassers, he feels as if he had entered
+some region of bliss where the earthly senses are too narrow for the
+delights that press for entrance to the soul.
+</p>
+<p>
+In the first place, the areca nut palm is almost, if not altogether, the
+most graceful of all its graceful tribe. Unlike the coconut, it grows as
+erect as a flagstaff, and the effect of this is increased by its extreme
+slenderness, for though it may attain a height of fifty feet, its
+diameter scarcely exceeds six inches. At the top of the stem there is a
+sheath of polished green, from the top of which again there issues a
+tuft of the most ethereal, feathery fronds, diverging and drooping with
+matchless grace. Under these hang the clusters of reddish-brown nuts.
+</p>
+<p>
+As the areca nut will not grow except in places that are at once moist
+and warm, the gardens are generally situated in narrow valleys and dells
+among hills, with little streams of limpid water rippling past them or
+through them. The steaming heat of such situations can only be realised
+by one who has traversed them at noon in the month of May in pursuit of
+sport or natural history. But the palms grow so close together that
+their fronds mingle into an almost unbroken roof, through which the sun
+can scarcely peep, and every air that enters there has the heat charmed
+out of it, and as it wanders among the broad, aromatic leaves of the
+betel vines which wreathe the pillars of that fairy hall, it is
+softened with balmy moisture, and laden with fragrance and scent to woo
+your senses in perfect tune with the tinkling music of the water and the
+enchanting beauty of the whole scene.
+</p>
+<p>
+In a large hut among these shades, with bananas waving their banner
+leaves over the smooth and well-swept yard in front, where the children
+play, lives the family that cultivates the garden. They are a sect of
+Brahmins, but very unbrahminical, unsophisticated, industrious,
+temperate, kind and hospitable. Other Brahmins despise them and wish to
+deny them the name, because they have soiled their priestly hands with
+agriculture. But they return the contempt, and walk in the way of their
+fathers, a way which leads them among the purest pleasures that this
+life affords and keeps them from many of its more sordid temptations.
+Perhaps the picture has its darker shades too. I have not seen them, and
+why should I look for them?
+</p>
+<p>
+The betel nut harvest is something of the nature of an acrobatic
+performance, for the crop is not on the ground, but on poles forty or
+fifty feet high. This is the manner in which it is gathered. The farmer,
+attended by his wife, goes out, and slipping a loose loop of rope over
+his feet to keep them together, so that when he gets the trunk of a tree
+between them it may fit like a wedge, he clasps one of the trees with
+his hands and goes up at a surprising rate. He carries with him a long
+rope, and when he reaches the top, he fastens one end of it to the
+tree, and throws the other to his wife, who goes to a distance and draws
+it tight. Then the man breaks off a heavy bunch of ripe nuts, and
+hitching it on the rope lets it go. It shoots down with such velocity
+that it would knock his wife down did she not know how to dodge it
+skilfully and break its force in a bend of the rope.
+</p>
+<p>
+When all the bunches are on the ground, the man begins to sway his body
+violently till the tender and supple palm is swinging like a pendulum
+and almost striking the trees on either side. Watching his opportunity,
+the man grasps one of these and transfers himself to it with the
+nimbleness of a monkey. In this way he makes an aerial journey round the
+garden and avoids the fatigue of climbing up and down every separate
+tree.
+</p>
+<p>
+The gathered betel nuts soon find their way to the warehouses of fat
+Bunias at the coast ports, where they are peeled and prepared and sorted
+and piled in great heaps according to quality, and finally shipped in
+<i>pattimars</i> and <i>cotias</i> and coasting steamers, and so disseminated over
+the length and breadth of the land to be the comforters of poor and
+rich.
+</p>
+<p>
+It only remains to say that the betel nut is not used in the East for
+tooth-powder, though the natives believe that the practice of chewing it
+saves them from toothache. When they use any dentifrice it is generally
+charcoal, and their toothbrush is either the forefinger or a fibrous
+stick chewed at the end till it becomes like a stiff paintbrush. But
+whatever he may use for the purpose, the Hindu cleans his teeth every
+morning, and that most thoroughly, before he will allow food to pass his
+lips, and the whiteness and soundness of his teeth are an object of envy
+to Englishmen.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_16"><!-- RULE4 16 --></a>
+<h2>
+ XVII
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+A HINDU FESTIVAL
+</center>
+<p>
+Poets may sing,</p>
+
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p> "Let the ape and tiger die,"</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p class="cont">but they are not quite dead yet, only caged, and where is the man in
+whose bosom there lurks no wish that he could open the door just once in
+a way and let them have a frisk? In the East there is no hypocrisy about
+the matter. The tiger's den is barred and locked, and the British
+Government keeps the key, but the ape has an appointed day in the year
+on which he shall have his outing. They call it the <i>Holi</i>, which is a
+misnomer, for of all Hindu festivals this is the most unholy; but of
+that anon.
+</p>
+<p>
+I asked a Brahmin what this festival commemorated, and he said he did
+not know. He knew how to observe it, which was the main thing. Of
+course, there is an explanation of it in Hindu mythology, which the
+Brahmin ought to have known, and very probably did know, but was ashamed
+to tell. But it matters little, for we may be well assured that the
+explanation was invented to sanctify the festival long after the
+festival itself came into vogue, as has been the case with some of our
+most Christian holidays.
+</p>
+<p>
+The Holi comes round about the time of the vernal equinox, when victory
+declares for day and warmth in its long struggle with night and cold.
+Then Nature rises and shakes herself as Samson rose and shook himself
+and snapped the seven new cords that bound him, as tow is snapped when
+it smells the fire. Then "the wanton lapwing gets himself another
+crest," and then also the young Hindu's fancy lightly turns to thoughts
+of love; and so it came about quite naturally that, looking around,
+among his plentiful gods, for a deity who might fitly be invited to
+preside over his lusty rejoicings at this season, he pitched upon
+Krishna.
+</p>
+<p>
+For Krishna, when he was upon this earth, was an amorous youth, and his
+goings on with certain milkmaids were such as would shock Mrs. Grundy at
+the present day even in India, supposing he had been only a man. But he
+was a god, therefore his doing a thing made it right, and, where he
+presides, his worshippers may do as he did. Consequently, man, woman and
+child of every caste and grade give themselves licence, during these
+days of the Holi, to act and speak in a manner that would be scandalous
+at any other time of the year.
+</p>
+<p>
+Hindus of the better sort are beginning to be outwardly, and some of
+them, I hope, inwardly, rather ashamed of this festival, and it is time
+they were. Yet there is always something cheering in the sight of
+untutored mirth and exuberant animal joy breaking out and triumphing
+over the sadness of life and the monotony of lowly toil; and I confess
+that I find a pleasing side to this festival of the Holi. I like it best
+as I have seen it in a fishing village on the west coast of India.
+</p>
+<p>
+At first sight you would not suspect the black and brawny Koli of much
+gaiety, but there is deep down in him a spring of mirth and humour
+which, "when wine and free companions kindle him," can break out into
+the most boisterous hilarity and jocundity and even buffoonery, throwing
+aside all trammels of convention and decorum. His women folk, too,
+though they do not go out of their proper place in the social system,
+assert themselves vigorously within it, and are gay and vivacious and
+well aware of their personal attractions. So the Koli village looks
+forward to the Holi and makes timely preparation for it.
+</p>
+<p>
+The night before the <i>poornima</i>, or full moon, of the month Phalgoon
+arrives, each trim fishing boat is stored with flowers and leafy
+branches, all the flags that can be mustered and a drum; then the whole
+village goes a-fishing. Next morning each housewife gets up early to
+decorate her house and trick out herself and her children. For though
+the Koli is the most naked of men, his whole workaday costume consisting
+of one rag about equal in amplitude to half a good pocket-handkerchief,
+his wife is the most dressy of women. She is always well-dressed even
+on common days. The bareness of her limbs may perhaps shock our notions
+of propriety at first, for, being a mud-wader of necessity, like the
+stork and the heron, she girds her garments about her very tightly
+indeed; but this only sets off her wonderfully erect and athletic
+figure, while her well-set head looks all the nicer that it has no
+covering except her own neatly-bound hair. She never draws her <i>saree</i>
+coyly over her head, like other native women, when she meets a man. On
+this day there is no change in the fashion of her costume (that never
+changes), but she puts on her brightest dress, blue, or red, or lemon
+yellow, with all her private jewellery, and decks her hair with a small
+chaplet of bright flowers.
+</p>
+<p>
+Her children are tricked out with more fancy. The little brown girl, who
+yesterday had not one square inch of cloth on the whole of her tiny
+person, comes out a <i>petite</i> miss in a crimson bodice and a white skirt,
+with her shining black hair oiled and combed and plaited and decked with
+flowers, and her neck and arms and feet twinkling with ornaments. Her
+brother of six or seven looks as if he were going to a fancy-dress ball
+in the character of His Highness the Holkar. His small head is set in a
+great three-cornered Maratha turban, and his body, a stranger to the
+feel of clothes, is masked in a resplendent purple jacket. The young men
+of the village, such of them as are not gone a-fishing, have donned
+clean white jackets. Beyond that they will not go, contemning
+effeminacy.
+</p>
+<p>
+About nine o'clock, when the sun is now well up, the distant sound of a
+tom-tom is heard, and the first of the returning fleet of <i>muchwas</i>
+appears at the mouth of the creek. A long line of red and white flags
+extends from the top of the mainyard to the helm and streamers flutter
+from the mastheads. A monster bouquet of marigolds is mounted on the
+bowsprit, branches of trees are stuck about in all possible situations,
+and three or four large fishes hang from the bow, trailing their tails
+in the water. With the exception of the man at the helm, who sits
+stolid, minding his business, and one youth who plays the tom-tom, the
+crew are standing in a ring, gesticulating with their arms and legs, or
+waving wands and branches of trees. Some have half of their faces
+smeared with red paint. If a boat passes they greet it with a shout and
+a sally of wit or ribaldry. The other <i>muchwas</i> follow close behind,
+with every inch of white sail spread and all a-flutter with flags and
+streamers: it would be difficult to imagine a prettier spectacle, and
+the tom-toming and the happiness beaming on the faces of the crews are
+almost infectious. One feels almost compelled to wave one's hat and cry,
+"Hip, hip, hooray!"
+</p>
+<p>
+The boats come to shore, and then there ought to be a tumbling out of
+the silvery harvest and a gathering of women and a strife indescribable
+of shrill tongues, and then a long procession of wives and daughters
+trotting to market, each balancing a great, dripping basket on her
+comely head, while the husbands and fathers go home to eat and sleep.
+But there is none of that to-day. The silvery harvest may go to
+destruction and the husbands and fathers can do without sleep for once.
+The children are taken on board in all their finery, and friends join
+and musicians with their instruments. Then all sails are spread again
+and the boats start for a circuit round the harbour. The wind blows
+fiercely from the north, and each buoyant <i>muchwa</i> scuds along at a
+fearful pace, heeling over until the rippling water fingers the edge of
+the gunwale as if it were just getting ready to leap over and take
+possession. But the hilarious Koli balances himself on the sloping
+thwarts and jumps and sings and claps his hands, while the pipes screech
+and the drums rattle. Twice, or three times, does the whole fleet go out
+over the bar and wheel and return, each boat racing to be first, with no
+more sense of danger than a porpoise at play.
+</p>
+<p>
+At last they have had enough. The sails are furled and the boats
+beached, the big fishes are taken down from the bows, and the whole
+crowd, with their trophies and garlands, dance their way to the village.
+There it is better that we leave them. To-night great fires will be
+lighted in the middle of the main road and capacious pots of toddy will
+be at hand, and every merry Koli will get hilariously drunk and do and
+say things which we had better not see and hear. And the children will
+look on and try to imitate their elders. And women will find it best to
+keep out of the way for the sake of their pretty dresses, if there were
+no better reason. For pots of water dyed crimson with <i>goolal</i> powder
+are ready, and everybody has licence to splash everybody when he gets a
+chance. Any time during the next two or three days you may find your own
+servants coming home dappled with red.
+</p>
+<p>
+So the ape has his fling. And the tiger is lurking not far behind. In
+each of those fires it is the proper thing to roast a cock, throwing him
+in alive. If the fire is a great one, a general village fire, then it is
+still greater fun to throw in a live goat. But the worst of these
+ceremonies are happily going out of fashion. For the English law is
+stern, and the <i>sahibs</i> have strange and quixotic notions about cruelty
+to animals, and although they are far away on tour at this season and no
+native officer would voluntarily interfere with an immemorial custom,
+still the tiger walks in fear in these days and the Koli is often
+content to roast a coconut as proxy for a cock or a goat.
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_17"><!-- RULE4 17 --></a>
+<h2>
+ XVIII
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+INDIAN POVERTY
+</center>
+<center>
+THE STANDARD OF LIVING
+</center>
+<p>
+When Mr. Keir Hardie was in India he satisfied himself that the standard
+of living among the working classes in India has been deteriorating.
+This is interesting psychologically, and one would like to know by what
+means Mr. Keir Hardie attained to satisfaction on such a great and
+important question. Doubtless he had the ungrudging assistance of Mr.
+Chowdry.
+</p>
+<p>
+The poverty of India has for a good many years been a handy weapon, like
+the sailor's belaying pin, for everyone who wanted to "have at" our
+administration of that country; and if "a lie which is half a truth is
+ever the blackest of lies," then this one must be as black as Tartarus,
+for it is indubitably more than half a truth. The common field-labourer
+in India is about as poor as man can be. He is very nearly as poor as a
+sparrow. His hut, built by himself, is scarcely more substantial or
+permanent than the sparrow's nest, and his clothing compares very
+unfavourably with the sparrow's feathers. The residue of his worldly
+goods consists of a few cooking pots and, it must be admitted, a few
+ornaments on his wife.
+</p>
+<p>
+But a sparrow is usually well fed and quite happy. It has no property
+simply because it wants none. If it stored honey like the busy bee, or
+nuts like the thrifty squirrel, it would be a prey to constant anxiety
+and stand in hourly danger of being plundered of its possessions, and
+perhaps killed for the sake of them. Therefore to speak of a Hindu's
+poverty as if it certainly implied want and unhappiness is mere
+misrepresentation born of ignorance. In all ages there have been men so
+enamoured of the possessionless life that they have abandoned their
+worldly goods and formed brotherhoods pledged to lifelong poverty. The
+majority of religious beggars in India belong to brotherhoods of this
+kind, and are the sturdiest and best-fed men to be seen in the country,
+especially in time of famine.
+</p>
+<p>
+But the Hindu peasant is not a begging friar, and may be supposed to
+have some share of the love of money which is common to humanity; so it
+is worth while to inquire why he is normally so very poor. There are two
+reasons, both of which are so obvious and have so often been pointed out
+by those who have known him best, that there is little excuse for
+overlooking them. The first of them is thus stated in Tennant's <i>Indian
+Recreations</i>, written in 1797, before British rule had affected the
+people of India much in one direction or another. "Industry can hardly
+be ranked among their virtues. Among all classes it is necessity of
+subsistence and not choice that urges to labour; a native will not earn
+six rupees a month by working a few hours more, if he can live upon
+three; and if he has three he will not work at all," Such was the Hindu
+a century ago in the eyes of an observant and judicious man, studying
+him with all the sympathetic interest of novelty, and such he is now.
+</p>
+<p>
+The other reason for the chronic poverty of the Indian peasant is that,
+if he had money beyond his immediate necessity, he could not keep it. It
+is the despair of the Government of India and of every English official
+who endeavours to improve his condition that he cannot keep his land, or
+his cattle, or anything else on which his permanent welfare depends. The
+following extract from <i>The Reminiscences of an Indian Police Official</i>
+gives a lively picture of the effect of unaccustomed wealth, not on
+peasants, but on farmers owning land and cattle and used to something
+like comfort.
+</p>
+<p>
+"Yellapa, like all cotton growers in that part of the Western
+Presidency, profited enormously by the high price of the staple during
+the American war. Silver was poured into the country (literally) in
+<i>crores</i> (millions sterling), and cultivators who previously had as much
+as they could do to live, suddenly found themselves possessed of sums
+their imagination had never dreamt of. What to do with their wealth, how
+to spend their cash was their problem. Having laden their women and
+children with ornaments, and decked them out in expensive <i>sarees</i>, they
+launched into the wildest extravagance in the matter of carts and
+trotting bullocks, going even as far as silver-plated yokes and harness
+studded with silver mountings. Even silver tyres to the wheels became
+the fashion. Twelve and fifteen rupees were eagerly paid for a pair of
+trotting bullocks. Trotting matches for large stakes were common; and
+the whole rural population appeared with expensive red silk umbrellas,
+which an enterprising English firm imported as likely to gratify the
+general taste for display. Many took to drink, not country liquors such
+as had satisfied them previously, but British brandy, rum, gin, and even
+champagne."
+</p>
+<p>
+A few pages further on the author tells us of the ruin by debt and
+drunkenness of the families which had indulged in these extravagances.
+The fact is that to keep for to-morrow what is in the hand to-day
+demands imagination, purpose and self-discipline, which the Hindu
+working man has not. He is the product of centuries, during which his
+rulers made the life of to-morrow too uncertain, while his climate made
+the life of to-day too easy. No outward applications will alone cure his
+poverty, because it is a symptom of an inward disease.
+</p>
+<p>
+When a healthier state of mind shall awaken an appetite for comforts and
+conveniences, and create necessities unknown to his fathers, then
+degrading poverty will no longer be possible as the common lot. And it
+was to be hoped that the British rule would in time have this happy
+effect. Tennant evidently thought that it had begun to do so even in his
+day. "The existence," he says, "of a regular British Government is but a
+recent circumstance; yet in the course of a few years complete security
+has been afforded to all of its dependants; many new manufactures have
+been established, many more have been extended to answer the demands of
+a larger exportation. We have therefore conferred upon our Asiatic
+subjects an increase of security, of industry and of produce, and of
+consequent greater means of enjoyment."
+</p>
+<p>
+It is therefore a very grave charge that Mr. Keir Hardie brings against
+the British Administration when he says, a century after these words
+were written, that the standard of living among the Hindu peasantry has
+deteriorated. Happily there does not appear to have been a close
+relation between facts and Mr. Keir Hardie's conclusions during his
+Indian tour, so we may continue to put our confidence in the many
+hopeful indications that exist of a distinct improvement in the ideal of
+life which has so long prevailed among our poor Indian fellow-subjects.
+The rise in the wages of both skilled and unskilled labour during even
+the last thirty years, especially in and near important towns, has been
+most remarkable.
+</p>
+<p>
+It is more to the point to know what the labourer is able to do and
+actually does with his wages, and here the returns of trade and the
+reports of the railway companies, post office and savings bank have
+striking evidence to offer. They are published annually, and anyone,
+even Mr. Keir Hardie, may consult them who likes his facts in
+statistical form. For those who live in India there are abundant
+evidences with more colour in them. Some thirty years ago, or more,
+there was a steamship company in Bombay owning two small steamers which
+carried passengers across the harbour. By degrees it extended its
+operations and increased its fleet until it had a daily service of fast
+steamers, with accommodation for nearly a thousand third-class
+passengers, which went down the coast as far as Goa, calling at every
+petty port on the way. The head of the firm retired some years ago,
+having made his pile. Seldom has a more profitable enterprise been
+started in Bombay. And whence did the profits come? From the pockets of
+Hindu peasants. The Mahrattas of the Ratnagiri District supply most of
+the "labour" required in Bombay, and for these the company spread its
+nets. And by their incessant coming and going it amassed its wealth.
+</p>
+<p>
+Heads of mercantile firms and Government offices, and all who have to
+deal with the Mahratta "puttiwala," viewed its success without surprise.
+Though always grumbling at his wages, he never appears to be without the
+means and the will to travel. A marriage, a religious ceremony in his
+family, or the death of some relative, requires his immediate presence
+in his village, and he asks for leave. If he cannot get it otherwise, he
+offers to forfeit his pay for the period. If it is still refused, he
+resigns his situation and goes. This does not indicate pinching poverty;
+there must be some margin between such men and starvation. And a saunter
+through their villages will amply confirm such a surmise.
+</p>
+<p>
+It is no uncommon thing in these coast villages to see that foreign
+luxury, a chair, perhaps even an easy-chair, in the verandah of a common
+Bhundaree (toddy-drawer). The rapidly growing use of chairs, glass
+tumblers, enamelled ironware, soda-water and lemonade, patent medicines,
+and even cheap watches, declares plainly that the young Hindu of the
+present day does not live as his fathers did. Men go better dressed, and
+their children are clothed at an earlier age. The advertisements in
+vernacular languages that one meets with, circulated and posted up in
+all sorts of places, tell the same tale convincingly; for the advertiser
+knows his business, and will not angle where no fish rise.
+</p>
+<p>
+Nor are large towns like Bombay the only places where the Hindu peasant
+widens his horizon and acquires new tastes. In the Fiji Islands there
+are about 22,000 natives of India who went out as indentured coolies
+with the option of returning at the end of five years at their own
+expense, or after ten years at that of Government. When these men come
+home, they bring with them new tastes and new ideas, as well as the
+habit of saving money and thousands of rupees saved during their short
+exile. In Mauritius and South Africa the Hindu working man is learning
+the same lessons. When he gets back to the sleepy life of his native
+village, he is not likely to settle down contentedly at the level from
+which he started.
+</p>
+<p>
+On every hand, in short, forces are at work stirring discontent in the
+breasts of the younger generation with the existence which was the
+heritage of their fathers. These forces operate from the outside, and
+the mass is large and very inert: it would be rash to say that in the
+heart of it there are not still millions who regard a monotonous
+struggle for a bare existence as their portion from Providence. But when
+a man who has travelled in India for half a cold season tells us that
+the standard of living in India has deteriorated, we are tempted to
+quote from Sir Ali Baba: "What is it that these travelling people put on
+paper? Let me put it in the form of a conundrum. Q. What is it that the
+travelling M.P. treasures up and the Anglo-Indian hastens to throw away?
+A. Erroneous hazy, distorted impressions." "One of the most serious
+duties attending a residence in India is the correcting of those
+misapprehensions which your travelling M.P. sacrifices his bath to
+hustle upon paper."
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+<a name="RULE4_18"><!-- RULE4 18 --></a>
+<h2>
+ XIX
+</h2>
+
+<center>
+BORROWED INDIAN WORDS
+</center>
+<p>
+Of the results of the Roman supremacy in Britain none have been so
+permanent as their influence on our language. No doubt this was less due
+to any direct effect that their residence among the Britons had at the
+time on vernacular speech than to the fact that, for many centuries
+after their departure, Latin was the language, throughout Europe, of
+literature and scholarship. Our supremacy in India is acting on the
+languages of that country in both ways, and though it has scarcely
+lasted half as long yet as the Roman rule in Britain, English already
+bids fair to become one day the common tongue of the Hindus. But there
+is also a current flowing the other way, comparatively insignificant,
+but curious and interesting.
+</p>
+<p>
+Few persons in England are aware how often they use words of Indian
+origin in common speech. In attempting to give a list of these I will
+exclude the trade names of articles of Indian produce or manufacture,
+which have no literary interest, and also words which indicate objects,
+ideas or customs that are not English, and therefore have no English
+equivalents, such as "tom-tom," "sepoy" and "suttee," I will also omit
+Indian words, such as "bundobust," and "griffin," which are used by
+writers like Thackeray in the same way in which French terms are
+commonly introduced into English composition.
+</p>
+<p>
+Of course, it is not always possible to draw a hard and fast line. There
+are words which first came into England as the trade names of Indian
+products, but have extended their significance, or entirely changed it,
+and taken a permanent place in the English language. Pepper still means
+what it originally meant, but it has also become a verb. Another example
+is Shawl, a word which has lost all trace of its Oriental origin. It is
+a pure Hindustani word, pronounced "Shal," and indicating an article
+thus described in the seventeenth century by Thevenot, as quoted in
+Hobson-Jobson:&mdash;"Une Chal, qui est une maniere de toilette d'une laine
+tr&egrave;s fine qui se fait a Cachmir." With the article to England came the
+name, but soon spread itself over all fabrics worn in the same fashion,
+except the Scotch plaid, which held its own.
+</p>
+<p>
+Somewhat similar is Calico, originally a fine cotton cloth imported from
+Calicut. This place is called Calicot by the natives, and may have
+dropped the final T through the influence of French dressmakers. Chintz
+is another example, being the Hindustani word "cheent," which means a
+spotted cotton cloth. In trade fabrics are always described in the
+plural, and the Z in Chintz is no doubt a perversion, through
+misunderstanding, of the terminal S. Lac is another Indian word which
+has retained its own meaning, but it has gone beyond it and given rise
+to a verb "to lacquer."
+</p>
+<p>
+With these perhaps should be mentioned Pyjamas and Shampoo, both of
+which have undergone strange perversions. Pyjama is an Indian name for
+loose drawers or trousers tied with a cord round the waist, such as
+Mussulmans of both sexes wear. In India the Pyjama was long ago adopted,
+with a loose coat to match, as a more decent and comfortable costume
+than the British nightshirt, and when Anglo-Indians retired they brought
+the fashion home with them, English tailors called the whole costume a
+"Pyjama suit," but the second word was soon dropped and the first
+improved into the plural number.
+</p>
+<p>
+"Shampoo" comes from a verb "champna," to press or squeeze, and the
+imperative, "champo," as often happens, was the form in which it became
+English. Forbes, in his <i>Oriental Memoirs</i>, writes of "the effects of
+opium, champoing and other luxuries indulged in by Oriental
+sensualists." When the medical profession in England began to patronise
+the practice, it assumed a more dignified name, "massage," and the old
+word was relegated to the hairdressers, who appropriated it to the
+washing of the head, an operation with which the word has no proper
+relation at all.
+</p>
+<p>
+There are two words of doubtful derivation, which may be mentioned in
+this connection. Cot, in the sense of a light bed, or cradle, is not
+much used in England, but is given in Webster's and other dictionaries,
+with the same Saxon derivation, as the "cot beside the hill" which the
+poet Rogers sighed for. If this is correct, then it is at least curious
+that the word should have almost gone out of use in England and revived
+in India from a distinct root. There it is the term in every-day use for
+any rough bedstead, such as the natives sleep on and call a khat. The
+average Englishman cannot aspirate a K, and never pronounces the Indian
+A aright unless it is followed by an R, so khat becomes "cot" by a
+process of which there are many illustrations.
+</p>
+<p>
+The other doubtful word mentioned above is Teapoy. It is defined in the
+dictionaries as an ornamental table, with a folding top, containing
+caddies for holding tea, but in India, where it is in much more general
+use than it is in England, it signifies simply a light tripod table and
+almost certainly comes from "teenpai" (three-foot), corresponding to
+another common word, "charpai" (four-foot), which means a native
+bedstead. The fact that it is sometimes spelled Tepoy confirms this, but
+the other spelling is commoner, and appears to have led to its getting a
+special meaning connected with tea among furniture sellers.
+</p>
+<p>
+Cheroot, Bangle, Curry and Kidgeree are examples of words which have
+come to us with the things which they signify, and retain their meaning
+though the thing itself may have undergone some change. Curry as made in
+England is sometimes not recognisable by a new arrival from India, and
+Kidgeree is applied to a preparation of rice and fish, whereas it means
+properly a dish of rice, split peas and butter, or "ghee." Fish may be
+eaten with it, but is not an ingredient of it. Bazaar may be classed
+with these words, and also Polo, which is merely the name for a polo
+ball in the language of one of the Himalayan tribes from whom we learned
+the game. It is said to have been played in England for the first time
+at Aldershot in 1871.
+</p>
+<p>
+More interest attaches to Gymkhana, for neither the word nor the thing
+which it signifies is Indian, though both originated in India, and the
+derivation of the word is unknown, though it is scarcely fifty years
+old. Several hybrid derivations have been suggested, none of them
+probable, and I lean to the suggestion that the starting-point of the
+word may have been "jumkhana", a term which, though it is not in
+Forbes's <i>Hindustani Dictionary,</i> I have heard a native apply to a large
+cotton carpet, such as native acrobats, or wrestlers, might spread when
+about to give a performance. Our use of the words Arena, Stage, Boards,
+Footlights, etc., shows how easily a carpet might give name to a place
+of meeting for athletic exercises.
+</p>
+<p>
+There is another class of words which have come into England through
+returned Anglo-Indians and spread by their own merit. One of these is
+Loot. The dictionary says that it means "to plunder," but it holds more
+than that or any equivalent English word. Perhaps it has scarcely risen
+above the level of slang yet, but the phrase "to run amuck" is
+classical, having been used by both Pope and Dryden. The pedantic
+attempt made by some writers to change the common way of writing it
+because the original Malay term is a single word, "amok," comes too late
+in view of Dryden's line,
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p> "And runs an Indian muck at all he meets."</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+Cheese, in the sense of a thing, or rather of "the very thing," must be
+ranked as slang too, though very common. The slang dictionaries give
+fanciful derivations from Anglo-Saxon roots, or suggest that it is a
+perversion of "chose"; but it is a common Hindustani word for a thing,
+and when an Englishman in India finds some article which exactly suits
+his purpose and exclaims, "Ah! that's the cheese," no one needs to ask
+the derivation. If it did not come to us directly from India, then it
+came through the gipsies, for it is one of the many Hindustani words
+which occur in their language. Another word that came from India
+indirectly is Caste, but it is of Portuguese origin. The early
+Portuguese writers applied it ("casta") to the hereditary division of
+Hindu society, and the English adopted it. It has now become
+indispensable. We have no other word that could take its place in the
+lines,
+</p>
+
+ <div class="poem">
+ <div class="stanza">
+ <p>Her manners had not that repose</p>
+ <p>Which stamps the caste of Vere de Vere.</p>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+
+<p>
+I must close with two familiar words which have been so long with us
+that few who use them ever suspect that they came from the East&mdash;namely,
+Punch and Toddy. The Rev. J. Ovington, who sailed to Bombay in 1689, in
+the ship that carried the glad news of the coronation of William and
+Mary, tells us that, in the East India Company's chief factory at Surat,
+the common table was supplied with "plenty of generous Sherash (Shiraz)
+wine and arak Punch," Arrack (properly "Urk"), sometimes abbreviated to
+Rack, means any distilled spirit, or essence, but is commonly used to
+distinguish country liquor from imported spirits. The Company's factors
+drank it because European wines and beer were at that time very
+expensive in India, and to reconcile it to their palates they made it
+into a brew called Punch, from the Indian word "panch," meaning five,
+because it contained five ingredients&mdash;viz. arrack, hot water, limes,
+sugar and spice. This was the ordinary drink of poor Englishmen in India
+for a longtime, and public "Punch-houses" existed in every settlement of
+the East India Company.
+</p>
+<p>
+Now, one of the principal substances from which country liquor is
+distilled is palm juice, the native name for which, "tadee," has been
+perverted into "toddy" (as in the case of "cot" above-mentioned), and
+"toddy punch" meant the same thing as "arrack punch," Returning
+Anglo-Indians brought the receipt for making this brew to England, and
+lovers of Vanity Fair will remember how the whole course of that story
+was changed by the bowl of "rack punch" which Joseph Sedley ordered at
+Vauxhall, where "everybody had rack punch." How soon both the brew and
+its Indian name took firm root and spread among us appears from the fact
+that, at the Holy Fair described by Burns in the century before last,
+the lads and lasses sit round a table and "steer about the toddy."
+</p>
+
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+<p>&nbsp;</p>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Concerning Animals and Other Matters
+by E.H. Aitken, (AKA Edward Hamilton)
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@@ -0,0 +1,5263 @@
+The Project Gutenberg EBook of Concerning Animals and Other Matters
+by E.H. Aitken, (AKA Edward Hamilton)
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Concerning Animals and Other Matters
+
+Author: E.H. Aitken, (AKA Edward Hamilton)
+
+Release Date: February 6, 2004 [EBook #10962]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONCERNING ANIMALS ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by Garrett Alley and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team
+
+
+
+
+[Illustration: Portrait of "EHA."]
+
+CONCERNING ANIMALS AND OTHER MATTERS
+
+BY E.H. AITKEN ("EHA")
+
+AUTHOR OF "FIVE WINDOWS OF THE SOUL," "TRIBES ON MY FRONTIER," ETC.
+
+WITH A MEMOIR OF THE AUTHOR BY
+
+SURGEON-GENERAL W.B. BANNERMAN I.M.S., C.S.I.
+
+WITH ILLUSTRATIONS BY J A. SHEPHERD AND A PORTRAIT
+
+LONDON
+
+
+1914
+
+
+
+
+CONTENTS
+
+ "EHA"
+
+ I FEET AND HANDS
+ II BILLS OF BIRDS
+ III TAILS
+ IV NOSES
+ V EARS
+ VI TOMMY
+ VII THE BARN OWL
+ VIII DOMESTIC ANIMALS
+ IX SNAKES
+ X THE INDIAN SNAKE-CHARMER
+ XI CURES FOR SNAKE-BITE
+ XII THE COBRA BUNGALOW
+ XIII THE PANTHER I DID NOT SHOOT
+ XIV THE PURBHOO
+ XV THE COCONUT TREE
+ XVI THE BETEL NUT
+ XVII A HINDU FESTIVAL
+ XVIII INDIAN POVERTY
+ XIX BORROWED INDIAN WORDS
+
+
+
+
+Special thanks are due to the Editors and Proprietors of the _Strand
+Magazine, Pall Mall Magazine_ and _Times of India_ for their courtesy in
+permitting the reprinting of the articles in this book which originally
+appeared in their columns.
+
+
+
+
+LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS
+
+HALF-TONES
+
+ "EHA"
+
+ THE NOSE OF THE ELEPHANT BECOMING A HAND HAS REDEEMED ITS MIND
+
+ GOOD FOR ANY ROUGH JOB
+
+ HERE THE COMPETITION HAS BEEN VERY KEEN INDEED
+
+ THE RAT IS A NEAR RELATION OF THE SQUIRREL ZOOLOGICALLY
+ BUT PERSONALLY HE IS A GUTTER-SNIPE, AND
+ YOU MAY KNOW THAT BY ONE LOOK AT THE TAIL, WHICH
+ HE DRAGS AFTER HIM LIKE A DIRTY ROPE
+
+ A BLACKBIRD AND A STARLING--THE ONE LIFTS ITS SKIRTS,
+ WHILE THE OTHER WEARS A WALKING DRESS
+
+ THE NOSTRILS OF THE APTERYX ARE AT THE TIP OF ITS BEAK
+
+ THE LONG-NOSED MONKEY
+
+
+LINE BLOCKS
+
+ AN AUTHENTIC STANDARD FOOT
+
+ THESE BEASTS ARE ALL CLODHOPPERS, AND THEIR FEET
+ ARE HOBNAILED BOOTS
+
+ IT HAS TO DOUBLE THEM UNDER AND HOBBLE ABOUT LIKE
+ A CHINESE LADY
+
+ NO DOUBT EACH BIRD SWEARS BY ITS OWN PATTERN
+
+ ITS BILL DESERVES STUDY
+
+ AS WONDERFUL AS THE PELICAN, BUT HOW OPPOSITE!
+
+ THERE ARE SOME ECCENTRICS, SUCH AS JENNY WREN, WHICH
+ HAVE DESPISED THEIR TAILS
+
+ AT THE SIGHT OF A RIVAL THE DOG HOLDS ITS TAIL UP STIFFLY
+
+ A SHREW CAN DO IT, BUT NOT A MAN
+
+ A BOLD ATTEMPT TO GROW IN THE CASE OF A TAPIR
+
+ I HAVE SEEN HUMAN NOSES OF A PATTERN NOT UNLIKE THIS,
+ BUT THEY ARE NOT CONSIDERED ARISTOCRATIC
+
+ WHO CAN CONSIDER THAT NOSE SERIOUSLY?
+
+ OR PERHAPS WHEN IT WANTS TO LISTEN IT RAISES A FLIPPER TO ITS EAR
+
+ "TEAR OUT THE HOUSE LIKE THE DOGS WUZ ATTER HIM"
+
+ A GREAT CATHOLIC CONGRESS OF DISTINGUISHED EARS
+
+ THE CURLS OF A MOTHER'S DARLING
+
+
+
+
+INTRODUCTION
+
+
+"EHA"
+
+Edward Hamilton Aitken, the author of the following sketches, was well
+known to the present generation of Anglo-Indians, by his pen-name of
+Eha, as an accurate and amusing writer on natural history subjects.
+Those who were privileged to know him intimately, as the writer of this
+sketch did, knew him as a Christian gentleman of singular simplicity and
+modesty and great charm of manner. He was always ready to help a
+fellow-worker in science or philanthropy if it were possible for him to
+do so. Thus, indeed, began the friendship between us. For when plague
+first invaded India in 1896, the writer was one of those sent to Bombay
+to work at the problem of its causation from the scientific side,
+thereby becoming interested in the life history of rats, which were
+shown to be intimately connected with the spread of this dire disease.
+Having for years admired Eha's books on natural history--_The Tribes on
+my Frontier, An Indian Naturalist's Foreign Policy_, and _The
+Naturalist on the Prowl_, I ventured to write to him on the subject of
+rats and their habits, and asked him whether he could not throw some
+light on the problem of plague and its spread, from the naturalist's
+point of view.
+
+In response to this appeal he wrote a most informing and characteristic
+article for _The Times of India_ (July 19, 1899), which threw a flood of
+light on the subject of the habits and characteristics of the Indian rat
+as found in town and country. He was the first to show that _Mus
+rattus_, the old English black rat, which is the common house rat of
+India outside the large seaports, has become, through centuries of
+contact with the Indian people, a domestic animal like the cat in
+Britain. When one realises the fact that this same rat is responsible
+for the spread of plague in India, and that every house is full of them,
+the value of this naturalist's observation is plain. Thus began an
+intimacy which lasted till Eha's death in 1909.
+
+The first time I met Mr. Aitken was at a meeting of the Free Church of
+Scotland Literary Society in 1899, when he read a paper on the early
+experiences, of the English in Bombay. The minute he entered the room I
+recognised him from the caricatures of himself in the _Tribes_. The
+long, thin, erect, bearded man was unmistakable, with a typically Scots
+face lit up with the humorous twinkle one came to know so well. Many a
+time in after-years has that look been seen as he discoursed, as only he
+could, on the ways of man and beast, bird or insect, as one tramped
+with him through the jungles on the hills around Bombay during week-ends
+spent with him at Vehar or elsewhere. He was an ideal companion on such
+occasions, always at his best when acting the part of _The Naturalist on
+the Prowl._
+
+Mr. Aitken was born at Satara in the Bombay Presidency on August 16,
+1851. His father was the Rev. James Aitken, missionary of the Free
+Church of Scotland. His mother was a sister of the Rev. Daniel Edward,
+missionary to the Jews at Breslau for some fifty years. He was educated
+by his father in India, and one can well realise the sort of education
+he got from such parents from the many allusions to the Bible and its
+old Testament characters that one constantly finds used with such effect
+in his books. His farther education was obtained at Bombay and Poona. He
+passed M.A. and B.A. of Bombay University first on the list, and won the
+Homejee Cursetjee prize with a poem in 1880. From 1870 to 1876 he was
+Latin Reader in the Deccan College at Poona, which accounts for the
+extensive acquaintance with the Latin classics so charmingly manifest in
+his writings. That he was well grounded in Greek is also certain, for
+the writer, while living in a chummery with him in Bombay in 1902, saw
+him constantly reading the Greek Testament in the mornings without the
+aid of a dictionary.
+
+He entered the Customs and Salt Department of the Government of Bombay
+in April 1876, and served in Kharaghoda (the Dustypore of the _Tribes_),
+Uran, North Kanara and Goa Frontier, Ratnagiri, and Bombay itself. In
+May, 1903, he was appointed Chief Collector of Customs and Salt Revenue
+at Karachi, and in November, 1905, was made Superintendent in charge of
+the District Gazetteer of Sind. He retired from the service in August
+1906.
+
+He married in 1883 the daughter of the Rev. J. Chalmers Blake, and left
+a family of two sons and three daughters.
+
+In 1902 he was deputed, on special duty, to investigate the prevalence
+of malaria at the Customs stations along the frontier of Goa, and to
+devise means for removing the Salt Peons at these posts, from the
+neighbourhood of the anopheles mosquito, by that time recognised as the
+cause of the deadly malaria, which made service on that frontier dreaded
+by all.
+
+It was during this expedition that he discovered a new species of
+anopheline mosquito, which after identification by Major James, I.M.S.,
+was named after him _Anopheles aitkeni_. During his long service there
+are to be found in the Annual Reports of the Customs Department frequent
+mention of Mr. Aitken's good work, but it is doubtful whether the
+Government ever fully realised what an able literary man they had in
+their service, wasting his talent in the Salt Department. On two
+occasions only did congenial work come to him in the course of his
+public duty--namely, when he was sent to study, from the naturalist's
+point of view, the malarial conditions prevailing on the frontier of
+Goa; and when during the last two years of his service he was put in
+literary charge of _The Sind Gazetteer_. In this book one can see the
+light and graceful literary touch of Eha frequently cropping up amidst
+the dry bones of public health and commercial statistics, and the book
+is enlivened by innumerable witty and philosophic touches appearing in
+the most unlikely places, such as he alone could enliven a dull subject
+with. Would that all Government gazetteers were similarly adorned! But
+there are not many "Ehas" in Government employ in India.
+
+On completion of this work he retired to Edinburgh, where most of the
+sketches contained in this volume were written. He was very happy with
+his family in his home at Morningside, and was beginning to surround
+himself with pets and flowers, as was his wont all his life, and to get
+a good connection with the home newspapers and magazines, when, alas!
+death stepped in, and he died after a short illness on April 25, 1909.
+
+He was interested in the home birds and beasts as he had been with those
+in India, and the last time the writer met him he was taking home some
+gold-fish for his aquarium. A few days before his death he had found his
+way down to the Morningside cemetery, where he had been enjoying the
+sunshine and flowers of Spring, and he remarked to his wife that he
+would often go there in future to watch the birds building their nests.
+
+Before that time came, he was himself laid to rest in that very spot in
+sure and certain hope of a blessed resurrection.
+
+The above imperfect sketch fails to give the charm and magnetic
+attraction of the man, and for this one must go to his works, which for
+those who knew him are very illuminating in this respect. In them one
+catches a glimpse of his plan for keeping young and cheerful in "the
+land of regrets," for one of his charms was his youthfulness and
+interest in life. He refused to be depressed by his lonely life. "I am
+only an exile," he remarks, "endeavouring to work a successful existence
+in Dustypore, and not to let my environment shape me as a pudding takes
+the shape of its mould, but to make it tributary to my own happiness."
+He therefore urges his readers to cultivate a hobby.
+
+"It is strange," he says, "that Europeans in India know so little, see
+so little, care so little, about all the intense life that surrounds
+them. The boy who was the most ardent of bug-hunters, or the most
+enthusiastic of bird-nesters in England, where one shilling will buy
+nearly all that is known, or can be known, about birds or butterflies,
+maintains in this country, aided by Messrs. B. &. S., an unequal strife
+with the insupportableness of an _ennui_-smitten life. Why, if he would
+stir up for one day the embers of the old flame, he could not quench it
+again with such a prairie of fuel around him. I am not speaking of
+Bombay people, with their clubs and gymkhanas and other devices for
+oiling the wheels of existence, but of the dreary up-country exile,
+whose life is a blank, a moral Sahara, a catechism of the Nihilist
+creed. What such a one needs is a hobby. Every hobby is good--a sign of
+good and an influence for good. Any hobby will draw out the mind, but
+the one I plead for touches the soul too, keeps the milk of human
+kindness from souring, puts a gentle poetry into the prosiest life. That
+all my own finer feelings have not long since withered in this land of
+separation from 'old familiar faces,' I attribute partly to a pair of
+rabbits. All rabbits are idiotic things, but these come in and sit up
+meekly and beg a crust of bread, and even a perennial fare of village
+_moorgee_ cannot induce me to issue the order for their execution and
+conversion into pie. But if such considerations cannot lead, the
+struggle for existence should drive a man in this country to learn the
+ways of his border tribes. For no one, I take it, who reflects for an
+instant will deny that a small mosquito, with black rings upon a white
+ground, or a sparrow that has finally made up its mind to rear a family
+in your ceiling, exercises an influence on your personal happiness far
+beyond the Czar of the Russias. It is not a question of scientific
+frontiers--the enemy invades us on all, sides. We are plundered,
+insulted, phlebotomised under our own vine and fig-tree. We might make
+head against the foe if we laid to heart the lesson our national history
+in India teaches--namely, that the way to fight uncivilised enemies is
+to encourage them to cut one another's throats, and then step in and
+inherit the spoil. But we murder our friends, exterminate our allies,
+and then groan under the oppression of the enemy. I might illustrate
+this by the case of the meek and long-suffering musk-rat, by spiders or
+ants, but these must wait another day."
+
+Again he says, "The 'poor dumb animals' can give each other a bit of
+their minds like their betters, and to me their fierce and tender little
+passions, their loves and hates, their envies and jealousies, and their
+small vanities beget a sense of fellow-feeling which makes their
+presence society. The touch of Nature which makes the whole world kin is
+infirmity. A man without a weakness is insupportable company, and so is
+a man who does not feel the heat. There is a large grey ring-dove that
+sits in the blazing sun all through the hottest hours of the day, and
+says coo-coo, coo, coo-coo, coo until the melancholy sweet monotony of
+that sound is as thoroughly mixed up in my brain with 110 deg. in the shade
+as physic in my infantile memories with the peppermint lozenges which
+used to 'put away the taste,' But as for these creatures, which confess
+the heat and come into the house and gasp, I feel drawn to them. I
+should like to offer them cooling drinks. Not that all my midday guests
+are equally welcome: I could dispense, for instance, with the
+grey-ringed bee which has just reconnoitred my ear for the third time,
+and guesses it is a key-hole--she is away just now, but only, I fancy,
+for clay to stop it up with. There are others also to which I would give
+their _conge_ if they would take it. But good, bad, or indifferent they
+give us their company whether we want it or not."
+
+Eha certainly found company in beasts all his life, and kept the charm
+of youth about him in consequence to the end. If his lot were cast, as
+it often was, in lonely places, he kept pets, and made friends besides
+of many of the members of the tribes on his frontier; if in Bombay city
+he consoled himself with his aquarium and the museum of the Bombay
+Natural History Society. When the present writer chummed with him in a
+flat on the Apollo Bunder in Bombay, he remembers well that aquarium and
+the Sunday-morning expeditions to the malarious ravines at the back of
+Malabar Hill to search for mosquito larvae to feed its inmates. For at
+that time Mr. Aitken was investigating the capabilities for the
+destruction of larvae, of a small surface-feeding fish with an
+ivory-white spot on the top of its head, which he had found at Vehar in
+the stream below the bund. It took him some time to identify these
+particular fishes (_Haplochilus lineatus_), and in the meantime he
+dubbed them "Scooties" from the lightning rapidity of their movements,
+and in his own admirable manner made himself a sharer of their joys and
+sorrows, their cares and interests. With these he stocked the ornamental
+fountains of Bombay to keep them from becoming breeding-grounds for
+mosquitoes, and they are now largely used throughout India for this very
+purpose. It will be recognised, therefore, that Mr. Aitken studied
+natural history not only for its own sake, but as a means of benefiting
+the people of India, whom he had learned to love, as is so plainly shown
+in _Behind the Bungalow_.
+
+He was an indefatigable worker in the museum of the Bombay Natural
+History Society, which he helped to found, and many of his papers and
+notes are preserved for us in the pages of its excellent _Journal_, of
+which he was an original joint-editor. He was for long secretary of the
+Insect Section, and then president. Before his retirement he was elected
+one of the Vice-Presidents of the Society.
+
+Mr. Aitken was a deeply religious man, and was for some twenty years an
+elder in the congregation of the United Free Church of Scotland in
+Bombay. He was for some years Superintendent of the Sunday School in
+connection with this congregation, and a member of the Committee of the
+Bombay Scottish Orphanage and the Scottish High Schools. His former
+minister says of him, "He was deeply interested in theology, and
+remained wonderfully orthodox in spite of" (or, as the present writer
+would prefer to say, _because of_) "his scientific knowledge. He always
+thought that the evidence for the doctrine of evolution had been pressed
+for more than it was worth, and he had many criticisms to make upon the
+Higher Critics of the Bible. Many a discussion we had, in which, against
+me, he took the conservative side."
+
+He lets one see very clearly into the workings of his mind in this
+direction in what is perhaps the finest, although the least well known
+of his books, _The Five Windows of the Soul_ (John Murray), in which he
+discourses in his own inimitable way of the five senses, and how they
+bring man and beast into contact with their surroundings. It is a book
+on perceiving, and shows how according as this faculty is exercised it
+makes each man such as he is. The following extract from the book shows
+Mr. Aitken's style, and may perhaps induce some to go to the book itself
+for more from the same source. He is speaking of the moral sense. "And
+it is almost a truism to say that, if a man has any taste, it will show
+itself in his dress and in his dwelling. No doubt, through indolence and
+slovenly habits, a man may allow his surroundings to fall far below what
+he is capable of approving; but every one who does so pays the penalty
+in the gradual deterioration of his perceptions.
+
+"How many times more true is all this in the case of the moral sense?
+When the heart is still young and tender, how spontaneously and sweetly
+and urgently does every vision of goodness and nobleness in the conduct
+of another awaken the impulse to go and do likewise! And if that impulse
+is not obeyed, how certainly does the first approving perception of the
+beauty of goodness become duller, until at last we may even come to hate
+it where we find it, for its discordance with the 'motions of sins in
+our members'!
+
+"But not less certainly will every earnest effort to bring the life into
+unison with what we perceive to be right bring its own reward in a
+clearer and more joyful perception of what is right, and a keener
+sensitiveness to every discord in ourselves. How all such discord may be
+removed, how the chords of the heart may be tuned and the life become
+music,--these are questions of religion, which are quite beyond our
+scope. But I take it that every religion which has prevailed among the
+children of Adam is in itself an evidence that, however debased and
+perverted the moral sense may have become, the painful consciousness
+that his heart is 'like sweet bells jangled' still presses everywhere
+and always on the spirit of man; and it is also a conscious or
+unconscious admission that there is no blessedness for him until his
+life shall march in step with the music of the 'Eternal Righteousness.'"
+
+Mr. Aitken's name will be kept green among Anglo-Indians by the
+well-known series of books published by Messrs. Thacker & Co., of London
+and Calcutta. They are _The Tribes on my Frontier, An Indian
+Naturalist's Foreign Policy_, which was published in 1883, and of which
+a seventh edition appeared in 1910. This book deals with the common
+birds, beasts, and insects in and around an Indian bungalow, and it
+should be put into the hands of every one whose lot is cast in India. It
+will open their eyes to the beauty and interests of their surroundings
+in a truly wonderful way, and may be read again and again with
+increasing pleasure as one's experience of Indian life increases.
+
+This was followed in 1889 by _Behind the Bungalow_, which describes with
+charming insight the strange manners and customs of our Indian domestic
+servants. The witty and yet kindly way in which their excellencies and
+defects are touched off is delightful, and many a harassed _mem-sahib_
+must bless Eha for showing her the humorous and human side of her life
+surrounded as it is by those necessary but annoying inhabitants of the
+Godowns behind the bungalow. A tenth edition of this book was published
+in 1911.
+
+_The Naturalist on the Prowl_ was brought out in 1894, and a third
+edition was published in 1905. It contains sketches on the same lines as
+those in _The Tribes_, but deals more with the jungles, and not so much
+with the immediate surroundings of the bungalow. The very smell of the
+country is in these chapters, and will vividly recall memories to those
+who know the country along the West Coast of India southward of Bombay.
+
+In 1900 was published _The Common Birds of Bombay_, which contains
+descriptions of the ordinary birds one sees about the bungalow or in the
+country. As is well said by the writer of the obituary notice in the
+_Journal_ of the Bombay Natural History Society, Eha "had a special
+genius for seizing the striking and characteristic points in the
+appearance and behaviour of individual species and a happy knack of
+translating them into print so as to render his descriptions
+unmistakable. He looked upon all creatures in the proper way, as if each
+had a soul and character of its own. He loved them all, and was
+unwilling to hurt any of them." These characteristics are well shown in
+this book, for one is able to recognise the birds easily from some
+prominent feature described therein.[1]
+
+_The Five Windows of the Soul_, published by John Murray in 1898, is of
+quite another character from the above, and was regarded by its author
+with great affection as the best of his books. It is certainly a
+wonderfully self-revealing book, and full of the most beautiful
+thoughts. A second impression appeared in the following year, and a new
+and cheaper edition has just been published. The portrait of Eha is
+reproduced from one taken in 1902 in a flat on the Apollo Bunder, and
+shows the man as he was in workaday life in Bombay. The humorous and
+kindly look is, I think, well brought out, and will stir pleasant
+memories in all who knew Mr. Aitken.
+
+W. B. B.
+
+MADRAS, _January_ 1914.
+
+
+
+
+FOOTNOTES:
+
+[Footnote 1: The illustrations are his own work, but the blocks having
+been produced in India, they do not do justice to the extreme delicacy
+of workmanship and fine perception of detail which characterise the
+originals, as all who have been privileged to see these will agree.]
+
+
+
+
+CONCERNING ANIMALS
+
+
+
+
+I
+
+
+FEET AND HANDS
+
+It is evident that, in what is called the evolution of animal forms, the
+foot came in suddenly when the backboned creatures began to live on the
+dry land--that is, with the frogs. How it came in is a question which
+still puzzles the phylogenists, who cannot find a sure pedigree for the
+frog. There it is, anyhow, and the remarkable point about it is that the
+foot of a frog is not a rudimentary thing, but an authentic standard
+foot, like the yard measure kept in the Tower of London, of which all
+other feet are copies or adaptations. This instrument, as part of the
+original outfit given to the pioneers of the brainy, backboned, and
+four-limbed races, when they were sent out to multiply and replenish the
+earth, is surely worth considering well. It consists essentially of a
+sole, or palm, made up of small bones and of _five_ separate digits,
+each with several joints.
+
+[Illustration: AN AUTHENTIC STANDARD FOOT.]
+
+In the hind foot of a frog the toes are very long and webbed from point
+to point. In this it differs a good deal from the toad, and there is
+significance in the difference. The "heavy-gaited toad," satisfied with
+sour ants, hard beetles, and such other fare as it can easily pick up,
+and grown nasty in consequence, so that nothing seeks to eat it, has
+hobbled through life, like a plethoric old gentleman, until the present
+day, on its original feet. The more versatile and nimble-witted frog,
+seeking better diet and greater security of life, went back to the
+element in which it was bred, and, swimming much, became better fitted
+for swimming. The soft elastic skin between the fingers or toes is just
+the sort of tissue which responds most readily to inward impulses, and
+we find that the very same change has come about in those birds and
+beasts which live much in water. I know that this is not the accepted
+theory of evolution, but I am waiting till it shall become so. We all
+develop in the direction of our tendencies, and shall, I doubt not, be
+wise enough some day to give animals leave to do the same.
+
+It seems strange that any creature, furnished with such tricky and
+adaptable instruments to go about the world with, should tire of them
+and wish to get rid of them, but so it happened at a very early stage.
+It must have been a consequence, I think, of growing too fast. Mark
+Twain remarked about a dachshund that it seemed to want another pair of
+legs in the middle to prevent it sagging. Now, some lizards are so long
+that they cannot keep from sagging, and their progress becomes a painful
+wriggle. But if you must go by wriggling, then what is the use of legs
+to knock against stems and stones? So some lizards have discarded two of
+their legs and some all four. Zoologically they are not snakes, but
+snakes are only a further advance in the same direction. That snakes did
+not start fair without legs is clear, for the python has to this day two
+tell-tale leg-bones buried in its flesh.
+
+When we pass from reptiles to birds, lo! an astounding thing has
+happened. That there were flying reptiles in the fossil ages we know,
+and there are flying beasts in our own. But the wings of these are
+simple mechanical alterations, which the imagination of a child, or a
+savage, could explain.
+
+The hands of a bat are hands still, and, though the fingers are hampered
+by their awkward gloves, the thumbs are free. The giant fruit bats of
+the tropics clamber about the trees quite acrobatically with their
+thumbs and feet.
+
+That Apollyonic monster of the prime, the pterodactyl, did even better.
+Stretching on each little finger a lateen sail that would have served to
+waft a skiff across the Thames, it kept the rest of its hands for other
+uses. But what bearing has all this on the case of birds? Here is a
+whole sub-kingdom, as they call it, of the animal world which has
+unreservedly and irrevocably bartered one pair of its limbs for a
+flying-machine. The apparatus is made of feathers--a new invention,
+unknown to amphibian or saurian, whence obtained nobody can say--and
+these are grafted into the transformed frame of the old limbs. The
+bargain was worth making, for the winged bird at once soared away in all
+senses from the creeping things of earth, and became a more ethereal
+being; "like a blown flame, it rests upon the air, subdues it, surpasses
+it, outraces it; it is the air, conscious of itself, conquering itself,
+ruling itself." But the price was heavy. The bird must get through life
+with one pair of feet and its mouth. But this was all the bodily
+furniture of Charles Francois Felu, who, without arms, became a famous
+artist.
+
+A friend of mine, standing behind him in a _salon_ and watching him at
+work, saw him lay down his brush and, raising his foot to his head, take
+off his hat and scratch his crown with his great toe. My friend was
+nearly hypnotised by the sight, yet it scarcely strikes us as a wonder
+when a parrot, standing on one foot, takes its meals with the other. It
+is a wonder, and stamps the parrot as a bird of talent. A mine of hidden
+possibilities is in us all, but those who dig resolutely into it and
+bring out treasure are few.
+
+And let us note that the art of standing began with birds. Frogs sit,
+and, as far as I know, every reptile, be it lizard, crocodile,
+alligator, or tortoise, lays its body on the ground when not actually
+carrying it. And these have each four fat legs. Contrast the flamingo,
+which, having only two, and those like willow wands, tucks up one of
+them and sleeps poised high on the other, like a tulip on its stem.
+
+Note also that one toe has been altogether discarded by birds as
+superfluous. The germ, or bud, must be there, for the Dorking fowl has
+produced a fifth toe under some influence of the poultry-yard, but no
+natural bird has more than four. Except in swifts, which never perch,
+but cling to rocks and walls, one is turned backwards, and, by a cunning
+contrivance, the act of bending the leg draws them all automatically
+together. So a hen closes its toes at every step it takes, as if it
+grasped something, and, of course, when it settles down on its roost,
+they grasp that tight and hold it fast till morning. But to birds that
+do not perch this mechanism is only an encumbrance, so many of them,
+like the plovers, abolish the hind toe entirely, and the prince of all
+two-legged runners, the ostrich, has got rid of one of the front toes
+also, retaining only two.
+
+[Illustration: THESE BEASTS ARE ALL CLODHOPPERS, AND THEIR FEET ARE
+HOBNAILED BOOTS.]
+
+To a man who thinks, it is very interesting to observe that beasts have
+been led along gradually in the very same direction. All the common
+beasts, such as cats, dogs, rats, stoats, and so on, have five ordinary
+toes. On the hind feet there may be only four. But as soon as we come to
+those that feed on grass and leaves, standing or walking all the while,
+we find that the feet are shod with hoofs instead of being tipped with
+claws. First the five toes, though clubbed together, have each a
+separate hoof, as in the elephant; then the hippopotamus follows with
+four toes, and the rhinoceros with practically three. These beasts are
+all clodhoppers, and their feet are hobnailed boots. The more active
+deer and all cattle keep only two toes for practical purposes, though
+stumps of two more remain. Finally, the horse gathers all its foot into
+one boot, and becomes the champion runner of the world.
+
+It is not without significance that this degeneracy of the feet goes
+with a decline in the brain, whether as cause or effect I will not
+pretend to know. These hoofed beasts have shallow natures and live
+shallow lives. They eat what is spread by Nature before their noses,
+have no homes, and do nothing but feed and fight with each other. The
+elephant is a notable exception, but then the nose of the elephant,
+becoming a hand, has redeemed its mind. As for the horse, whatever its
+admirers may say, it is just a great ass. There is a lesson in all this:
+"from him that hath not shall be taken even that which he hath."
+
+There is another dull beast which, from the point of view of the mere
+systematist, seems as far removed from those that wear hoofs as it could
+be, but the philosopher, considering the point at which it has arrived,
+rather than the route by which it got there, will class it with them,
+for its idea of life is just theirs turned topsy-turvy. The nails of the
+sloth, instead of being hammered into hoofs on the hard ground, have
+grown long and curved, like those of a caged bird, and become hooks by
+which it can hang, without effort, in the midst of the leaves on which
+it feeds. A minimum of intellect is required for such an existence, and
+the sloth has lost any superfluous brain that it may have had, as well
+as two, or even three, of its five toes.
+
+To return to those birds and beasts with standard feet, I find that the
+first outside purpose for which they find them serviceable is to scratch
+themselves. This is a universal need. But a foot is handy in many other
+ways. A hen and chickens, getting into my garden, transferred a whole
+flower-bed to the walk in half an hour. Yet a bird trying to do anything
+with its foot is like a man putting on his socks standing, and birds as
+a race have turned their feet to very little account outside of their
+original purpose. Such a simple thing as holding down its food with one
+foot scarcely occurs to an ordinary bird. A hen will pull about a
+cabbage leaf and shake it in the hope that a small piece may come away,
+but it never enters her head to put her foot on it. In this and other
+matters the parrot stands apart, and also the hawk, eagle, and owl; but
+these are not ordinary birds.
+
+Beasts, having twice as many feet as birds, have learned to apply them
+to many uses. They dig with them, hold down their food with them, fondle
+their children with them, paw their friends, and scratch their enemies.
+One does more of one thing and another of another, and the feet soon
+show the effects of the occupation, the claws first, then the muscles,
+and even the bones dwindling by disuse, or waxing stout and strong. Then
+the joy of doing what it can do well impels the beast further on the
+same path, and its offspring after it.
+
+[Illustration: THE NOSE OF THE ELEPHANT BECOMING A HAND HAS REDEEMED
+ITS MIND]
+
+And this leads at last to specialism. The Indian black bear is a "handy
+man," like the British Tar--good all round. Its great soft paw is a very
+serviceable tool and weapon, armed with claws which will take the face
+off a man or grub up a root with equal ease. When a black bear has found
+an ant-hill it takes but a few minutes to tear up the hard, cemented
+clay and lay the deep galleries bare; then, putting its gutta-percha
+muzzle to the mouth of each, it draws such a blast of air through them
+that the industrious labourers are sucked into its gullet in drifts.
+Afterwards it digs right down to the royal chamber, licks up the bloated
+queen, and goes its way.
+
+But there is another worker in the same mine which does not go to work
+this way. The ant-eater found fat termites so satisfying that it left
+all other things and devoted its life to the exploiting of anthills, and
+now it has no rival at that business, but it is fit for nothing else.
+Its awkward digging tools will not allow it to put the sole of its foot
+to the ground, so it has to double them under and hobble about like a
+Chinese lady. It has no teeth, and stupidity is the most prominent
+feature of its character. It has become that poor thing, a man of one
+idea.
+
+But the bear is like a sign-post at a parting of the ways. If you
+compare a brown bear with the black Indian, or sloth bear, as it is
+sometimes called, you may detect a small but pregnant difference. When
+the former walks, its claws are lifted, so that their points do not
+touch the ground. Why? I have no information, but I know that it is not
+content with a vegetarian diet, like its black relative, but hankers
+after sheep and goats, and I guess that its murderous thoughts flow down
+its nerves to those keen claws. It reminds me of a man clenching his
+fist unconsciously when he thinks of the liar who has slandered him.
+
+[Illustration: IT HAS TO DOUBLE THEM UNDER AND HOBBLE ABOUT LIKE A
+CHINESE LADY.]
+
+But what ages of concentration on the thought and practice of
+assassination must have been required to perfect that most awful weapon
+in Nature, the paw of a tiger, or, indeed, of any cat, for they are all
+of one pattern. The sharpened flint of the savage has become the
+scimitar of Saladin, keeping the keenness of its edge in a velvet sheath
+and flashing out only on the field of battle. Compare that paw with the
+foot of a dog, and you will, perhaps, see with me that the servility and
+pliancy of the slave of man has usurped a place in his esteem which is
+not its due. The cat is much the nobler animal. Dogs, with wolves,
+jackals, and all of their kin, love to fall upon their victim in
+overwhelming force, like a rascally mob, and bite, tear, and worry until
+the life has gone out of it; the tiger, rushing single-handed, with a
+fearful challenge, on the gigantic buffalo, grasps its nose with one paw
+and its shoulder with the other, and has broken its massive neck in a
+manner so dexterous and instantaneous that scarcely two sportsmen can
+agree about how the thing is done.
+
+I have said that the foot first appeared when the backboned creatures
+came out of the waters to live upon the dry land. But all mundane things
+(not excepting politics) tend to move in circles, ending where they
+began; and so the foot, if we follow it far enough, will take us back
+into water. See how the rat--I mean our common, omnivorous, scavenging,
+thieving, poaching brown rat--when it lives near a pond or stream,
+learns to swim and dive as naturally as a duck. Next comes the vole, or
+water-rat, which will not live away from water. Then there are water
+shrews, the beaver, otter, duck-billed platypus, and a host of others,
+not related, just as, among birds, there are water ousels, moorhens,
+ducks, divers, etc., which have permanently made the water their home
+and seek their living in it. All these have attained to web-footedness
+in a greater or less degree.
+
+That this has occurred among reptiles, beasts, and birds alike shows
+what an easy, or natural, or obvious (put it as you will) modification
+it is. And it has a consequence not to be escaped. Just as a man who
+rides a great deal and never walks acquires a certain indirectness of
+the legs, and you never mistake a jockey for a drill-sergeant, so the
+web-footed beasts are not among the things that are "comely in going."
+
+Following this road you arrive at the seal and sea-lion. Of all the feet
+that I have looked at I know only one more utterly ridiculous than the
+twisted flipper on which the sea-lion props his great bulk in front,
+and that is the forked fly-flap which extends from the hinder parts of
+the same. How can it be worth any beast's while to carry such an absurd
+apparatus with it just for the sake of getting out into the air
+sometimes and pushing itself about on the ice and being eaten by Polar
+bears? The porpoise has discarded one pair, turned the other into decent
+fins, and recovered a grace and power of motion in water which are not
+equalled by the greyhound on land. Why have the seals hung back? I
+believe I know the secret. It is the baby! No one knows where the
+porpoise and the whale cradle their newborn infants--it is so difficult
+to pry into the domestic ways of these sea-people--but evidently the
+seals cannot manage it, so they are forced to return to the land when
+the cares of maternity are on them.
+
+I have called the feet of these sea beasts ridiculous things, and so
+they are as we see them; but strip off the skin, and lo! there appears a
+plain foot, with its five digits, each of several joints, tipped with
+claws--nowise essentially different, in short, from that with which the
+toad, or frog, first set out in a past too distant for our infirm
+imagination. Admiration itself is paralysed by a contrivance so simple,
+so transmutable, and so sufficient for every need that time and change
+could bring.
+
+There remains yet one transformation which seems simple compared with
+some that I have noticed, but is more full of fate than they all; for
+by it the foot becomes a hand. This comes about by easy stages. The
+reason why one of a bird's four toes is turned back is quite plain:
+trees are the proper home of birds, and they require feet that will
+grasp branches. So those beasts also that have taken to living in trees
+have got one toe detached more or less from the rest and arranged so
+that it can co-operate with them to catch hold of a thing. Then other
+changes quickly follow. For, in judging whether you have got hold of a
+thing and how much force you must put forth to keep hold of it, you are
+guided entirely by the pressure on the finger-points, and to gauge this
+pressure nicely the nerves must be refined and educated. In fact, the
+exercise itself, with the intent direction of the mind to the
+finger-points, brings about the refinement and education in accordance
+with Sandow's principle of muscle culture.
+
+For an example of the result do not look at the gross paw of any
+so-called anthropoid ape, gorilla, orang-outang, or chimpanzee, but
+study the gentle lemur. At the point of each digit is a broad elastic
+pad, plentifully supplied with delicate nerves, and the vital energy
+which has been directed into them appears to have been withdrawn from
+the growth of the claws, which have shrunk into fine nails just
+shielding the fleshy tips. In short, the lemur has a hand on each of its
+four limbs, and no feet at all. And as it goes about its cage--I am at
+the Zoo in spirit--with a silent wonder shining out of its great eyes,
+it examines things by _feeling_ them with its hands.
+
+How plainly a new avenue from the outer world into its mind has been
+opened by those fingers! But how about scratching? What would be the
+gain of having higher susceptibilities and keener perceptions if they
+only aggravated the triumph of the insulting flea? Nay, this disaster
+has been averted by reserving a good sharp claw on the forefinger (not
+the thumb) of each hind hand.
+
+The old naturalists called the apes and lemurs Quadrumana, the
+"four-handed," and separated the Bimana, with one species--namely, _Homo
+sapiens_. Now we have anatomy cited to belittle the difference between a
+hand and a foot, and geology importuned to show us the missing link,
+pending which an order has been instituted roomy enough to hold monkeys,
+gorillas, and men. It is a strange perversity. How much more fitting it
+were to bow in reverent ignorance before the perfect hand, taken up from
+the ground, no more to dull its percipient surfaces on earth and stones
+and bark, but to minister to its lord's expanding mind and obey his
+creative will, while his frame stands upright and firm upon a single
+pair of true feet, with their toes all in one rank.
+
+
+
+
+II
+
+
+BILLS OF BIRDS
+
+The prospectus, or advertisement, of a certain American typewriting
+machine commences by informing the public that "The ---- typewriter is
+founded on an idea." When I saw this phrase I secured it for my
+collection, for I felt that, without jest, it contained the kernel of a
+true philosophy of Nature. The forms, the _phainomena_, of Nature are
+innumerable, multifarious, interwoven, and infinitely perplexing, and
+you may spend a happy life in unravelling their relations and devising
+their evolutions; but until you have looked through them and seen the
+ideas that are behind them you are a mere materialist and a blind
+worker. The soul of Nature is hid from you.
+
+What is the bill of a bird and what does it mean? I do not refer to the
+bill of a hawk, or a heron, or an owl, or an ostrich, but to that which
+is the abstract of all these and a thousand more. I hold, regardless of
+anatomy and physiology, that a bird is a higher being than a beast. No
+beast soars and sings to its sweetheart; no beast remains in lifelong
+partnership with the wife of its youth; no beast builds itself a
+summer-house and decks it with feathers and bright shells. A beast is a
+grovelling denizen of the earth; a bird is a free citizen of the air.
+And who can say that there is not a connection between this difference
+and other developments? The beast, thinking only of its appetites, has
+evolved a delicate nose, a discriminating palate, three kinds of teeth
+to cut, tear, and grind its food, salivary glands to moisten the same,
+and a perfected apparatus of digestion.
+
+[Illustration: GOOD FOR ANY ROUGH JOB]
+
+The bird, occupied with thoughts of love and beauty, with "fields, or
+waves, or mountains" and "shapes of sky or plain," has made little
+advance in the art and instruments of good living. It swallows its food
+whole, scarcely knowing the taste of it, and a pair of forceps for
+picking it up, tipped and cased with horn, is the whole of its dining
+furniture. For the bill of a bird, primarily and essentially, is that
+and nothing else. In the chickens and the sparrows that come to steal
+their food, and the robin that looks on, and all the little dicky-birds,
+you may see it in its simplicity. The size and shape may vary, as a
+Canadian axe differs from a Scotch axe; some are short and stout and
+have a sharp edge for shelling seeds; some are longer and fine-pointed,
+for picking worms and caterpillars out of their hiding-places; some a
+little hooked at their points, and one, that of the crossbill, with
+points crossed for picking the small seeds out of fir-cones; but all
+are practically the same tool. Yet the last distinctly points the way to
+those modifications by which the simple bill is gradually adapted to one
+special purpose or another, until it becomes a wonderful mechanism in
+which the original intention is quite out of sight.
+
+At this point I find an instructive parable in my tool chest. Fully half
+of the tools are just knives. A chisel is a knife, a plane is a knife
+set in a block of wood, a saw is a knife with the edge notched.
+Moreover, there are many sorts of curious planes and saws, each intended
+for one distinct kind of fine work. All these the joiner has need of,
+but a schoolboy would rather have one good, strong pocket-knife than the
+whole boxful. For, just in proportion as each tool is perfected for its
+own special work, it becomes useless for any other. And your schoolboy
+is not a specialist. He wants a tool that will cut a stick, carve a
+boat, peel an apple, dig out a worm--in short, one that will do whatever
+his active mind wants done.
+
+Now apply this parable to the birds. If you see a bill that is nothing
+but a large and powerful pair of forceps, good for any rough job, you
+may know without further inquiry that the owner is no limited
+specialist, but a "handy man," bold, enterprising, resourceful, and good
+all round. He will not starve in the desert. No wholesome food comes
+amiss to him--grub, slug, or snail, fruit, eggs, a live mouse or a dead
+rat, and he can deal with them all. Such are the magpie, the crow, the
+jackdaw, and all of that ilk; and these are the birds that are found in
+all countries and climates, and prosper wherever they go.
+
+[Illustration: NO DOUBT EACH BIRD SWEARS BY ITS OWN PATTERN.]
+
+But all birds cannot play that part. One is timid, another fastidious,
+another shy but ingenious. So, in the universal competition for a
+living, each has taken its own line according to the bent of its nature,
+and its one tool has been perfected for its trade until it can follow no
+other. The thrush catches such worms as rashly show themselves
+above-ground; but an ancient ancestor of the snipe found that, if it
+followed them into marshy lands, it could probe the soft ground and drag
+them out of their chambers. For this operation it has now a bill three
+inches long, straight, thin and sensitive at the tip, a beautiful
+instrument, but good for no purpose except extracting worms from soft
+ground. If frost or drought hardens the ground, the snipe must starve or
+travel. Among the many "lang nebbit" birds that follow the same
+profession as the snipe, some, like the curlew and the ibis, have curved
+bills of prodigious length. I do not know the comparative advantages of
+the two forms, but no doubt each bird swears by its own pattern, as
+every golfer does by his own putter.
+
+But now behold another grub-hunter, which, distasting mud, has
+discovered an unworked mine in the trunks of trees. There, in deep
+burrows, lurked great succulent beetle-grubs, demanding only a tool with
+which they might be dug out. This has been perfected by many stages, and
+I have now before me a splendid specimen of the most improved
+pattern--namely, the bill of the great black woodpecker of Western
+India, a bird nearly as big as a crow. It is nothing else than a hatchet
+in two parts, which, when locked together, present a steeled edge about
+three-eighths of an inch in breadth. The hatchet is two and a half
+inches long by one in breadth at the base, and a prominent ridge, or
+keel, runs down the top from base to point. It is further strengthened
+by a keel on each side. Inside of it, ere the bird became a mummy, was
+her tongue, which I myself drew out three inches beyond the point of the
+bill. It was rough and tough, like gutta-percha, tipped with a fine
+spike, and armed on each side, for the last inch of its length, with a
+row of sharp barbs pointing backwards. The whole was lubricated with
+some patent stickfast, "always ready for use." That grub must sit tight
+indeed which this corkscrew will not draw when once the hatchet has
+opened a way.
+
+The swallows and swifts, untirable on their wings, but too gentle to
+hold their own in a jostling crowd, soared away after the midges and
+May-flies and pestilent gnats that rise from marsh and pond to hold
+their joyous dances under the blue dome. Continually rushing
+open-mouthed after these, they have stretched their gape from ear to
+ear; but their bills have dwindled by disuse and left only an apology
+for their absence.
+
+Compared with all these, the birds that can do with a diet of fruit only
+lead an easy life. They have just to pluck and eat--that is, if they are
+pleased with small fruits and content to swallow them whole. But the
+hornbills, being too bulky to hop among twigs, need a long reach; hence
+the portentous machines which they carry on their faces. The beak of a
+hornbill is nothing else than a pair of tongs long enough to reach and
+strong enough to wrench off a wild fig from its thick stem. If it were
+of iron it would be thin and heavy; being of cellular horn-stuff it is
+bulky but light. If you ask why it should rise up into an absurd helmet
+on the queer fowl's head, I cannot tell. Nature has quaint ways of using
+up surplus material.
+
+[Illustration: ITS BILL DESERVES STUDY]
+
+An easy life begets luxury, and among fruit-eaters the parrot has become
+an epicure. It will not swallow its food whole, and its bill deserves
+study. In birds generally the upper mandible is more or less joined to
+the skull, leaving only the lower jaw free to move. But in the parrot
+the upper mandible is also hinged, so that each plays freely on the
+other. The upper, as we all know, is hooked and pointed; the lower has a
+sharp edge. The tongue is thick, muscular, and sensitive. The whole
+makes a wonderful instrument, unique among birds, for feelingly
+manipulating a dainty morsel, shelling, peeling, and slicing, until
+nothing is left but the sweetest part of the core. Of all gourmands
+Polly is the most shameless waster.
+
+Long before land, trees, and air had been exploited the primitive bird
+must have discovered the harvest of the waters, and here the competition
+has been very keen indeed. Yet the form of bill most in use is very
+simple--just a plain pair of forceps, long and sharp-pointed like
+scissors. This is evidently hard to beat, for birds of many sorts use
+it, handling it variously. The kingfisher plumps bodily down on the
+minnow from an overhanging perch; the solan goose, soaring, plunges from
+a "pernicious height"; the heron, high on its stilts, darts out a long
+and serpentine neck; the diver, with similar beak and neck, but
+different legs, pursues the fleeing shoals under water; to the swift and
+slippery fish all are alike terrible in their certainty.
+
+There are, however, other varieties of the fishing bill. Some have a
+hook at the point, as that of the cormorant, and some are straight at
+the top, but curved on the under side. This last form is handy for
+storks, which do not pluck fish out of water so much, but scoop up
+frogs, crabs, and reptiles from the ground. The ridiculous bill of the
+puffin, or sea-parrot, is an eccentricity. There may be some idea in it,
+but I suspect it is an effect of vanity merely, being coloured blue,
+yellow, and red, and quite in keeping with the other absurdities of the
+wearer.
+
+Apart from all these and by itself stands a princely fisher whose bill
+is no modification, but an original invention and a marvellous one.
+Larger than a swan and gluttonous withal, the pelican cannot live on
+single fishes. It has given up angling altogether and taken to netting;
+and the way in which the net has been constructed out of the pair of
+forceps provided in the original plan of its construction is as well
+worth your examining as anything I know. It is a foot in length, the
+upper jaw is flat and broad, while the lower consists of two thin,
+elastic bones joined at the point, a mere ring to carry the curious
+yellow bag that hangs from it. In pictures this is represented as a
+creel in which the kind pelican carries home the children's breakfast;
+you are allowed to see the tail of a big fish hanging out. But it is not
+a creel; it is a net. The great birds, marshalled in line on some broad
+lake or marsh, and beating the water with their wings, drive the fish
+before them until they have got a dense crowd huddled in panic and
+confusion between them and the shore. Now watch them narrowly. As
+each monstrous bill opens, the thin bones of the lower jaw stretch
+sideways to the breadth of a span by some curious mechanism not
+described in the books, and at the same time the shrunken bag expands
+into a deep, capacious net. Simultaneously the whole instrument is
+plunged into the struggling, silvery mass and comes up full. The side
+bones instantly contract again, and the upper jaw is clapped on them
+like a lid. No wonder the fishermen of the East detest the pelican.
+
+[Illustration: HERE THE COMPETITION HAS BEEN VERY KEEN INDEED.]
+
+[Illustration: AS WONDERFUL AS THE PELICAN, BUT HOW OPPOSITE!]
+
+In the same marsh, perhaps, standing with unequalled grace upon the
+longest legs known in this world, is a troop of giant birds as wonderful
+as the pelican, but how opposite! The beautiful flamingo is a bird of
+feeble intellect, delicate appetite, and genteel tastes. It cannot eat
+fish, for its slender throat would scarcely admit a pea. Besides, the
+idea of catching anything, or even picking up food from the ground, does
+not occur to its simple mind. Its diet consists of certain small
+crustaceans, classed by naturalists with water-fleas, which abound in
+brackish water; and it has an instrument for taking these which it knows
+how to use. I kept flamingos once, and, after trying many things in
+vain, offered them bran, or boiled rice, floating in water. Then they
+dined, and I learned the construction and working of the most marvellous
+of all bills. The lower jaw is deep and hollow, and its upper edges turn
+in to meet each other, so that you may fairly describe it as a pipe
+with a narrow slit along the upper side. In this pipe lies the tongue,
+and it cannot get out, for it is wider than the slit, but it can be
+pressed against the top to close the slit, and then the lower jaw
+becomes an actual pipe. The root of the tongue is furnished on both
+sides with a loose fringe which we will call the first strainer. The
+upper jaw is thin and flat and rests on the lower like a lid, and it is
+beautifully fringed along both sides with small, leathery points, close
+set, like the teeth of a very fine saw. This is the second strainer. To
+work the machine you dip the point into dirty water full of water-fleas,
+draw back the tip of the tongue a little, and suck in water till the
+lower jaw (the pipe) is full, then close the point again with the tip of
+the tongue and force the water out. It can only get out by passing
+through the first strainers at the root of the tongue, then over the
+palate, and so through the second strainers at the sides of the bill;
+and all the solid matter it contained will remain in the mouth. The
+sucking in and squirting out of the water is managed by the cheeks, or
+rather by the cheek, for a flamingo has only one cheek, and that is
+situated under the chin. When the bird is feeding you will see this
+throbbing faster than the eye can follow it, while water squirts from
+the sides of the mouth in a continuous stream. I should have said that
+the whole bill is sharply bent downwards at the middle. The advantage of
+this is that when the bird lets down its head into the water, like a
+bucket into a well, the point of the bill does not stick in the mud, but
+lies flat on it, upside down.
+
+In conclusion, let us not fail to note, whatever be our political creed,
+that, while all the birds pursue their respective industries, there sit
+apart, in pride of place, some whose bills are not tools wherewith to
+work, but weapons wherewith to slay. And these take tribute of the rest,
+not with their consent, but of right.
+
+
+
+
+III
+
+
+TAILS
+
+The secrets of Nature often play like an iridescence on the surface, and
+escape the eye of her worshipper because it is stopped with a
+microscope. There are mysteries all about us as omnipresent as the
+movement of the air that lifts the smoke and stirs the leaves, which I
+cannot find that any philosopher has looked into. Often and deeply have
+I been impressed with this. For example, there is scarcely, in this
+world, a commoner or a humbler thing than a tail, yet how multifarious
+is it in aspect, in construction, and in function, a hundred different
+things and yet one. Some are of feathers and some of hair, and some bare
+and skinny; some are long and some are short, some stick up and some
+hang down, some wag for ever and some are still; the uses that they
+serve cannot be numbered, but one name covers them all. In the course of
+evolution they came in with the fishes and went out with man. What was
+their purpose and mission? What place have they filled in the scheme of
+things? In short, what is the true inwardness of a tail?
+
+If we try to commence--as scientific method requires--with a
+definition, we stumble on a key, at the very threshold, which opens the
+door. For there is no definition of a tail; it is not, in its nature,
+anything at all. When an animal's fore-legs are fitted on to its
+backbone at the proper distance from the hind-legs, if any of the
+backbone remains over, we call it a tail. But it has no purpose; it is a
+mere surplus, which a tailor (the pun is unavoidable) would have trimmed
+off. And, lo! in this very negativeness lies the whole secret of the
+multifarious positiveness of tails. For the absence of special purpose
+is the chance of general usefulness. The ear must fulfil its purpose or
+fail entirely, for it can do nothing else. Eyes, nose and mouth, hands
+and feet, all have their duties; the tail is the unemployed. And if we
+allow that life has had any hand in the shaping of its own destiny, then
+the ingenuity of the devices for turning the useless member to account
+affords one of the most exhilarating subjects of contemplation in the
+whole panorama of Nature. The fishes fitted it up at once as a
+twin-propeller, with results so satisfactory that the whale and the
+porpoise, coming long after, adopted the invention. And be it noted that
+these last and their kin are now the only ocean-going mammals in the
+world. The whole tribe of paddle-steamers, such as seals and walruses
+and dugongs, are only coasters.
+
+Among those beasts that would live on the dry land, the primitive
+kangaroo could think of nothing better to do with his tail than to make
+a stool of it. It was a simple thought, but a happy one. Sitting up
+like a gentleman, he has his hands free to scratch his ribs or twitch
+his moustache. And when he goes he needs not to put them to the ground,
+for his great tail so nearly equals the weight of his body that one pair
+of legs keeps the balance even. And so the kangaroo, almost the lowest
+of beasts, comes closer to man in his postures than any other. The
+squirrel also sits up and uses his forepaws for hands, but the squirrel
+is a sybarite who lies abed in cold weather, and it is every way
+characteristic of him that he has sent his tail to the furrier and had
+it done up into a boa, or comforter, at once warm and becoming. See,
+too, how daintily he lifts it over his back to keep it clean. The rat is
+a near relation of the squirrel zoologically, but personally he is a
+gutter-snipe, and you may know that by one look at the tail which he
+drags after him like a dirty rope. Others of the same family, cleaner,
+though not more ingenious, like the guinea-pig, have simply dispensed
+with the encumbrance; but the rabbit has kept enough to make a white
+cockade, which it hoists when bolting from danger. This is for the
+guidance of the youngsters. Nearly every kind of deer and antelope
+carries the same signal, with which, when fleeing through dusky woods,
+the leader shows the way to the herd and the doe to her fawn.
+
+But of beasts that graze and browse, a large number have turned their
+tails rather to a use which throws a pathetic light on misery of which
+we have little experience. We do, indeed, growl at the gnats of a summer
+evening and think ourselves very ill-used. How little do we know or
+think of the unintermitted and unabated torment that the most harmless
+classes of beasts suffer from the bands of beggars which follow them
+night and day, demanding blood, and will take no refusal. Driven from
+the brow they settle on the neck, shaken from the neck they dive between
+the legs, and but for that far-reaching whisk at the end of the tail,
+they would found a permanent colony on the flanks and defy ejection,
+like the raiders of Vatersay. Darwin argues that the tail-brush may have
+materially helped to secure the survival of those species of beasts that
+possessed it, and no doubt he is right.
+
+The subject is interminable, but we must give a passing glance to some
+quixotic tails. The opossum scampers up a tree, carrying all her
+numerous family on her back, and they do not fall off because each
+infant is securely moored by its own tail to the uplifted tail of its
+mother. The opossum is a very primitive beast, and so early and useful
+an invention should, one would think, have been spread widely in after
+time; but there appears to be some difficulty in developing muscles at
+the thin end of a long tail, for the animals that have turned it into a
+grasping organ are few and are widely scattered. Examples are the
+chameleon among lizards, our own little harvest mouse, and, pre-eminent
+above all, the American monkeys. To a howler, or spider-monkey, its
+long tail is a swing and a trapeze in its forest gymnasium. Humboldt saw
+(he says it) a cluster of them all hanging from a tree by one tail,
+which proceeded from a Sandow in the middle. I should like to see that
+too. It is worth noting, by the way, that no old-world monkey has
+attained to this application of its tail.
+
+Then there is the beaver, whose tail I am convinced is a trowel. I know
+of no naturalist who has mentioned this, but such negative evidence is
+of little weight. The beaver, as everybody knows, is a builder, who cuts
+down trees and piles log upon log until he has raised a solid, domed
+cabin from seven to twenty feet in diameter, which he then plasters over
+with clay and straw. If he does not turn round and beat the work smooth
+with his tail, then I require to know for what purpose he carries that
+broad, heavy, and hard tool behind him.
+
+How few even among lovers of Nature know why a frog has no tail! The
+reason-is simply that it used that organ up when it was in want. In
+early life, as a jolly tadpole, it had a flourishing tail to swim with,
+and gills for breathing water, and an infantile mouth for taking
+vegetable nourishment. But when it began to draw near to frog's estate,
+serious changes were required in its structure to fit it for the life of
+a land animal. Four tiny legs appeared from under its skin, the gills
+gave place to air-breathing lungs, and the infant lips to a great,
+gaping mouth. Now, during this "temporary alteration of the premises"
+all business was of necessity stopped. The half-fish, half-frog could
+neither sup like an infant nor eat like a man. In this extremity it fed
+on its own tail--absorbed it as a camel is said to absorb its hump when
+travelling in the foodless desert--and so it entered on its new life
+without one.
+
+Aeronautics have changed the whole perspective of life for birds, as
+they may for us shortly; so it is no surprise to find that birds have,
+almost with one consent, converted their tails into steering-gear. A
+commonplace bird, like a sparrow, scarcely requires this except as a
+brake when in the act of alighting; but to those birds with which flight
+is an art and an accomplishment, an expansive forked or rounded tail
+(there are two patents) is indispensable. We have shot almost all the
+birds of this sort in our own country, and must travel if we would enjoy
+that enchanting sight--a pair of eagles or a party of kites gone aloft
+for a sail when the wind is rising, like skaters to a pond when the ice
+is bearing. For an hour on end, in restful ease or swift joy, they trace
+ever-varying circles and spirals against the dark storm-cloud, now
+rising, now falling, turning and reversing, but never once flapping
+their widespread pinions.
+
+How is it done? How does the _Shamrock_ sail? Watch, and you will see.
+When the wind is behind, each stiff quill at the end of the wing stands
+out by itself and is caught and driven by the blast; but as the bird
+turns round to face the gale, they all close up and form a continuous
+mainsail, close-hauled. And all the while the expanded tail is in play,
+dipping first at one side and then at the other, and turning the trim
+craft with easy grace "as the governor listeth."
+
+[Illustration: THERE ARE SOME ECCENTRICS, SUCH AS JENNY WREN, WHICH HAVE
+DESPISED THEIR TAILS.]
+
+Besides ground birds, like the quail, there are some eccentrics, such as
+Jenny wren, which have despised their tails, and there are specialists
+also which require them for other purposes than flying. The woodpecker's
+tail is quite useless as a rudder, for he is a woodman and has altered
+and adapted it for a portable stool to rest against as he plies his axe.
+
+But that man must be very blind to the place which birds have taken in
+the progress of civilisation who can suppose it possible that they
+should think only of utility in such a question as the disposal of their
+tails. It is a common notion among those who have acquired some
+smattering of the theory of evolution that fishes developed into
+reptiles, reptiles into birds, and birds into beasts; but this is as
+wrong as it could be. Whatever the genealogy of the beasts may be, they
+certainly were not evolved from birds, and are in many respects not
+above them but below them. These are two independent branches of the
+tree of living forms, as the Greeks and Romans were branches of the
+stock of Japheth. The beasts may stand for the conquering Romans if you
+like, but the birds are the Greeks, and have advanced far beyond them in
+all emotional and artistic sensibility. They worship in the temple of
+music and beauty. And, like ourselves, they have found no subject so
+worthy of the highest efforts of art as their own dress. But the
+clothing of the body must conform more or less to the figure, and so,
+for a field in which invention and fancy may sport untrammelled, a lady
+turns to her hat and a bird to its tail. And by both, with equal
+heroism, every consideration of mere comfort, convenience, health, or
+safety is swept aside in obedience to the higher aim. Is this only a
+flippant jocularity, or is there here in very truth some profound law of
+the mind revealing itself in spheres seemingly so disconnected?
+
+Look at a peacock. Its train, by the way, is a false tail, like the
+chignon of twenty years ago, or the fringe of the present day; the true
+tail is under it, and serves no purpose but to support it. Now the
+peacock lives on the ground, among scrub and brushwood, haunted by
+jackals and wild cats. They, like soldiers in khaki, reconnoitre him in
+a uniform expressly designed to elude the eye, but he flaunts a flag
+resplendent with green and gold. And when his one chance of life lies in
+springing nimbly from the ground and committing himself to his strong
+wings, he must lift and carry this ponderous paraphernalia with him. And
+the terrible Bonelli's eagle is soaring above. But all is risked proudly
+for the sake of the morning hour in the glade where the ladies assemble.
+And the peacock is only one of many. Not to mention the lyre bird, the
+Argus pheasant, the bird of paradise, and other splendid examples, there
+are common dicky-birds which point the moral and adorn the tail as
+emphatically.
+
+If the tail is a rudder, where should you look to find it in its most
+simple and efficient form but among the flycatchers, which make their
+living by aerial acrobatics after flies? Yet this family seems to be
+peculiarly prone to the vanity of a stylish tail. The paradise
+flycatcher flutters two streamers a foot long, like white ribbons,
+behind it. The fantail could hide behind its own fan. The bee-eater has
+the two central feathers prolonged and pointed. The drongos, which are
+flycatchers in habit, wear their tails very long and deeply forked; and
+one of them, the racket-tailed drongo, has the two side feathers
+extended beyond the rest for nearly a foot, and as thin as wires,
+expanding into a blade at the ends. I have seen nothing in ladies' hats
+more preposterous. It is vain to object that there can be no proper
+comparison between tails and hats because the woman chooses her own hat
+while the bird has to wear what Nature has given it. I know that, but
+the contention is utterly superficial. What choice has a woman as to the
+style of her hat? Fashion prescribes for her, and Nature for the birds;
+that is all the difference. No doubt she acquiesces when theoretically
+she might rebel. The bird cannot rebel, but does it not acquiesce? Does
+a lyre bird submit to its tail--wear it under protest, so to speak?
+Believe me, every bird that has an aesthetic tail knows the fact, and
+tries to live up to it. We may push the argument even further, for the
+motmot of Brazil is not content with a ready-made tail, but actually
+strips the web off the two long side feathers with its own beak, except
+a little patch at the end, so as to get the pattern which Nature, if one
+must use the phrase, gave to the racket-tailed drongo. A specimen is
+exhibited in the hall of the South Kensington Museum.
+
+[Illustration: A BLACKBIRD AND A STARLING--THE ONE LIFTS ITS SKIRTS,
+WHILE THE OTHER WEARS A WALKING DRESS.]
+
+In this connection I may also say that the shape or colour of a tail is
+not everything. An observant eye may find much to note in the wearing of
+them. There is a stylish way of carrying a tail and a slovenly way, and
+there are coquettish arts for the display of recherche tails. A
+blackbird and a starling are both tidy birds, and both walk much on the
+ground, but the one lifts its skirts, while the other, more practical
+and less fashionable, wears a walking dress and saves itself trouble.
+
+This line of observation leads to a higher, and reveals the most
+important purpose that tails have served in the economy of beast, bird,
+and reptile, and, perhaps, even cold-blooded fish. Before the godlike
+countenance of man appeared on the earth, with its contractile forehead
+and erectile eyebrows, the answering light of the eye, the expansive
+nostrils, and subtilely mobile lips; before that the tail was the prime
+vehicle of emotion and safety-valve of passion. It is a great truth, too
+often buried in these days under rubbish of materialistic theories, that
+some way of self-manifestation is a supreme necessity of all sentient
+life. From the hot centre of thought and feeling the currents rush along
+the nervous ways and pervade the whole frame, seeking an outlet. But
+many passages are barred by duty, or fear, or eager purpose. A strong
+gust of passion may burst all barriers and force its way out at every
+point, but gentle currents flow along the lines of least resistance and
+find the idle tail. I do not know a better illustration of this than a
+cat watching a mouse. The ears are pricked forward, the eyes are fixed
+on the unsuspecting victim, every muscle of the legs is tense, like a
+bent bow ready to speed the arrow on its way. But see, the excitement
+with which the whole body is charged cannot be wholly restrained, and
+oozes out at the point of the tail.
+
+[Illustration: AT THE SIGHT OF A RIVAL THE DOG HOLDS ITS TAIL UP
+STIFFLY]
+
+Every emotion and passion takes this course. The happy kid wags its tail
+as it runs to its mother, the donkey when it has executed a successful
+bray, and the dog when it sees its master. At the sight of a rival the
+dog holds its tail up stiffly, unless, indeed, the rival is a bigger dog
+than itself, in which case the index goes down quickly between the legs.
+An elated horse elevates its tail, and so does a duck in the same mood.
+A lizard preparing to fight another lizard
+
+ Swinges the scaly horror of his folded tail,
+
+and the raging lion of fiction lashes its sides with the same nervous
+instrument.
+
+It would be tedious to dwell on the pretty part which the tail plays in
+the courtships of sparrows and pigeons, or on the sprightly attitudes by
+which birds of all sorts let off their spirits when shower and sunshine
+have overfilled their hearts with gladness. But birds twitch their tails
+constantly, without meaning anything by it. The ceaseless wagging of a
+wagtail is a mere habit of cheerfulness, like the twirling of her thumbs
+by an idle Scotswoman. The long tail is there and something must be done
+with it. Look at the embarrassment which a nervous young man shows about
+the disposal of his hands; how he thrusts them into his trouser pockets,
+hangs them by their thumbs from the arm-holes of his waistcoat, or gives
+them a walking-stick to play with. I like to imagine what such a fellow
+would do with a long tail if he had it--how he would wind it round each
+leg in turn, rub up his back hair, and describe figures on the floor.
+But no animal so self-conscious as man could bear up long under the
+nervous strain of having to think continually of its tail. It would die
+young and the race would become extinct. Perhaps it did.
+
+A final word on the conclusion of the whole matter, for these
+reflections have a moral. As habit becomes character, so expression
+hardens into feature. The tail of a sheep grows downwards, but that of a
+goat upwards, and this is the only infallible outward mark of
+distinction between the two animals. But it is the permanent record of a
+long history. The sheep was never anything but sheepish; the goat and
+its forefathers were pert as kids and insolent when their beards grew.
+It is useless to inquire why insolence should express itself by an
+upturned tail until someone can advance a reason why it should express
+itself in another way.
+
+For proof of the fact you need go no farther than your own dogs. The
+ancestral wolf, or jackal, hunting and fighting, fearing and hoping,
+showed every changing mood by the pose of its tail; but a change came
+when it acquired an assured position of security and importance as the
+chosen companion of man, so dreaded by all its kith and kin. The tail
+went up at once and stayed there; when it could go no higher, it curled
+over. But promotion breeds conceit only in base natures. The greyhound
+is a gentleman, respectful and self-respecting, and it shows that by the
+very carriage of its tail. Only a snob at heart, petted and pampered for
+many generations, could have produced that perfect incarnation of smug
+self-satisfaction, the pug. Let us take the lesson home. The thoughts on
+which we let our minds dwell, and the sentiments that we harbour in our
+hearts, are the chisels with which we are carving out our faces and
+those of our children's children.
+
+
+
+
+IV
+
+
+NOSES
+
+Some may think that I have chosen a trivial subject, and they will look
+for frivolous treatment of it. I can only hope that they will be
+disappointed. There is nothing that the progress of science has taught
+us more emphatically than this--that we must call nothing insignificant.
+Seemingly trivial pursuits have led to discoveries which have benefited
+all mankind, and priceless truths have been dug out of the most
+unpromising mines. I am not insinuating that anyone's nose is an
+unpromising mine, but I say that I am persuaded there is wisdom hidden
+in that organ for him who will observingly distil it out.
+
+[Illustration: A SHREW CAN DO IT, BUT NOT A MAN.]
+
+It possesses a peculiar and mystical significance not shared by any
+other feature. This is abundantly proved by common speech, which is one
+of the most trustworthy of all kinds of evidence. For example, we speak
+of a person turning up his nose at a good offer. The phrase is absurd,
+for the power of turning up his nose is one which no human being ever
+possessed. A shrew can do it, but not a man. Yet the meaning of the
+saying needs no interpretation. Akin to it is the classical phrase,
+_adunco suspendere naso_. What Horace means scarcely requires
+explanation, but no commentator has successfully explained it. These
+expressions well illustrate the mystery that enshrouds our most salient
+feature. They show that, while everybody can see that disdain is
+expressed through the nose, nobody can define how it is done. Then there
+is that curious expression "put his nose out of joint," which is quite
+inexplicable, the nose being destitute of joint. There are many other
+phrases and also gestures which point in the same direction, but need
+not be cited, being for the most part vulgar. Allusions to the nose have
+a tendency to be vulgar, which is another mystery inciting us to
+investigate it. So let us proceed.
+
+The first thing required by the principles of scientific precedure is a
+definition. What is a nose? But this proves to be a much more difficult
+question than anyone would suspect before he tried to answer it. The
+individual human nose we can recognise, describe or sketch more easily
+than any other feature, but try to define the thing _nose_ in Nature and
+it is a most elusive phenomenon. When we speak of a man being led by the
+nose we imply that it is a part of him which is prominent and situated
+in front, when we speak of keeping one's nose above water we refer to it
+as the breathing orifice, but when we say that this or that offends our
+nose we are regarding it as the seat of the sense of smell. I believe
+that all these three ideas must be included in any definition. It should
+follow that insects, which breathe through holes in their sides, cannot
+have noses, and this is the truth.
+
+Fishes, too, though they may have snouts, have not noses, because they
+breathe by gills. In truth, it seems that the nose was a very late and
+high acquisition, almost the finishing touch of the perfected animal
+form. And incidentally this leads us to notice what a great step was
+taken in evolution when the breathing holes were brought up to the
+region of the mouth. For the sense of taste is necessarily situated in
+the mouth, and the sense of smell is in close alliance with it. The
+mouth tastes food dissolved in the saliva during the process of
+mastication, and the primary use of the sense of smell is to detect and
+analyse beforehand the small particles given off by food and floating in
+the atmosphere.
+
+A good many years ago, when the late Sally chimpanzee was the darling of
+the Zoological Gardens in Regent's Park, I watched her eating dates. She
+was an epicure, and always peeled each date delicately with her
+preposterous lips before eating it, and during the process she would
+apply the date to her nose every second to test its quality or enjoy its
+aroma. The action was indescribably comical, but what would it have been
+if her nostrils had been situated among her ribs? Imagine a mantis, for
+example, as he chews up a fly, lifting one of his wings and applying it
+to his flanks to see if it smells gamey. That is where some naturalists
+believe that the sense of smell is situated in insects. Others, however,
+think, with reason, that it is in the antennae or mouth. Nobody knows;
+the senses of the lower animals seem to be stuck about all parts of the
+body.
+
+But, even if the sense of smell is at the mouth, how limited must its
+usefulness be when it can only deal with substances that are held to it!
+A new era dawned when the passages by which the breath of life
+unceasingly comes and goes were transferred to the region of the mouth
+also. The nerves of smell quickly spread themselves over the lining
+membrane of those passages and became warders of the gate, challenging
+every waft of air that entered the body and examining what it carried.
+Thenceforth this region comprising the mouth, nostrils and surrounding
+parts holds a new and high place in the economy of the body, for the
+headquarters of the intelligence department are located there, and all
+the faculties of the brain converge on that point. Of course, the eyes
+and ears claim a share, but they are not far off.
+
+Now it is being recognised more and more clearly by medical and
+physiological science that when the mind is much directed to any part of
+the body it exercises an influence in some way not understood on the
+flow of blood to that part to a degree which may seriously affect its
+functions and even its growth. When a person is suffering from any
+nervous affection, from heart disease, or even from weakness of the
+eyes, it is of the utmost importance to keep him from knowing it if
+possible, for if he knows it he will think about it, and that will
+inevitably aggravate it. This principle is well recognised in systems of
+physical culture. And surely it is impossible that so much intelligence
+should pass through that one sensitive region of the body which we are
+considering without affecting its growth and structure. Every muscle in
+it becomes quick to respond to various sensations in different ways,
+till the very recollection of those sensations will excite the same
+response.
+
+Nay, we may go further. The mental emotions excited by those sensations
+will be expressed in the same way. For example, the sense of smell is
+peculiarly effective in exciting disgust. Anything which does violence
+to the sense of hearing exasperates, but does not disgust. If a man
+practises the accordion all day in the next room you do not loathe him,
+you only want to kill him. But anything that stinks excites pure
+disgust. Here you have the key to the fact that disgust and all feelings
+akin to it, disdain, contempt and scorn, express themselves through the
+nose. Darwin says that when we think of anything base or vile in a man's
+character the expression of the face is the same "as if we smelled a bad
+smell." This is an example of the temporary expression of a passing
+emotion, and there are many others like it. But each of us has his
+prevailing and dominant emotions which constitute the habitual
+attitude of his mind. And by the habitual indulgence of any emotion the
+features will become habituated to the expression of it, and so the set
+of our features comes at last to express our prevailing and dominant
+emotions; in other words, our _character_.
+
+[Illustration: THE NOSTRILS OF THE APTERYX ARE AT THE TIP OF ITS BEAK.]
+
+But let us return to the evolution of the nose. In these days of
+universal "Nature study" nobody need be told that the practice of
+breathing through the nostrils was introduced by the amphibians and
+reptiles. The former (frogs and toads) take to it only when they come of
+age, but lizards, snakes and all other reptiles do it from infancy. But
+the nose is not yet. That is something too delicate to come out of a
+cold-blooded snout covered with hard scales. Birds, too, by having their
+mouth parts encased in a horny bill seem to be debarred from wearing
+noses. And yet there is one primeval fowl, most ancient of all the
+feathered families, which has come near it. I mean the apteryx, that
+eccentric, wingless recluse which hides itself in the scrub jungles of
+New Zealand. Its nostrils, unlike those of every other bird, are at the
+tip of its beak, which is swollen and sensitive; and Dr. Buller says
+that as it wanders about in the night it makes a continual sniffing and
+softly taps the walls of its cage with the point of its bill. But the
+apteryx is one of those odd geniuses which come into the world too soon,
+and perish ineffectual. Its kindred are all extinct, and so will it be
+ere long.
+
+[Illustration: A BOLD ATTEMPT TO GROW IN THE CASE OF A TAPIR]
+
+When we come to the beasts we find the right conditions at last for the
+growth of the nose. Take the horse for an example of the average beast
+without idiosyncrasy. Its profile is nearly a straight line from the
+crown to the nostrils, beyond which it slopes downwards to the lips. The
+skin of this part is soft and smooth, without hair, and the horse dearly
+loves to have it fondled. The sense of touch is evidently uppermost. At
+this stage there was what to the eye of fancy looks like a bold attempt
+to grow a nose in the case of a tapir, but it miscarried. These hoofed
+beasts are all very hard up for something in the way of a hand to bring
+their food to their mouths. The camel employs its lips and the cow its
+tongue; the muntjae or barking deer of India has attained a tongue of
+such length that it uses it for a handkerchief to wipe its eyes. So the
+tapir could not resist the temptation to misapply its nose to the
+purpose of gathering fodder, and the ultimate result was the elephant,
+whose nose is a wonderful hand and a bucket and other things. The pig,
+being a swine, debased its nose in a worse way, making a grubbing tool
+of it.
+
+There has been another attempt to misuse and pervert this part of the
+face which I scarcely dare to touch upon, for it is so utterly fantastic
+and mystical that I fear the charge of heresy if I give words to my
+thoughts. It occurs among bats, a tribe of obscure creatures about which
+common knowledge amounts to this, that they fly about after sunset, are
+uncanny, and fond of getting entangled in the hair of ladies, and should
+be killed. But there are certain families of bats, named horseshoe bats,
+leaf-nosed bats and vampires about which common knowledge is _nil_, and
+the knowledge possessed by naturalists very little, so I will tell what
+I know of them. They are larger than common bats, their wings are broad,
+soft and silent, like those of the owl, they sleep in caves, tombs and
+ruins, they do not flutter in the open air, but swiftly traverse gloomy
+avenues and shady glades, their prey is not gnats and midges, but the
+"droning beetle," the death's head moth, the cockchafer, croaking frogs,
+sleeping birds and _human blood_. The books will tell you that these
+bats are distinguished by "complicated nasal appendages consisting of
+foliaceous skin processes around the nostrils," which is quite true and
+utterly futile. It may do for a dried skin or a specimen in spirits of
+wine. I have had the foul fiend in a cage and looked him in the face.
+His whole countenance, from lips to brow and from cheek to cheek, is
+covered and hidden by a hideous design of
+
+ Spells and signs,
+ Symbolic letters, circles, lines,
+
+sculptured in living, quivering skin. It is a sight to make the flesh
+creep. The books suggest that these foliaceous appendages are the organs
+of some special sense akin to touch. Futile again! There are things in
+Nature still which prompt the naturalist who has not atrophied his inner
+eye and starved his imagination to cry out:
+
+ Science ...
+ Why preyest thou thus upon the poet's heart,
+ Vulture, whose wings are dull realities?
+
+Supposing there should be in the unseen universe an evil spirit, an imp
+of malice and mischief, not Milton's Satan, but the Deil of Burns:
+
+ Whyles ranging, like a roaring lion,
+ For prey, a' holes an' corners tryin;
+ Whyles on the strong-winged tempest flyin,
+ Tirlin the kirks;
+ Whyles in the human bosom pryin,
+
+and supposing him to crave possession of a body through which he might
+get into touch with this material world and express himself in outward
+forms and motions; then oh! how fitly were this bat explained.
+
+But let us go back to firm ground. If you compare a dog's profile with
+that of a horse you will note at once that the nostrils are in advance
+of the lips, and have a kind of portal to themselves. This is a distinct
+advance. The sense of smell has come to the front and pushed aside the
+lower sense of touch. You will observe, too, that with the growth of the
+brain the brain-pan has elevated itself above the level of the nose.
+Through the cat to the monkeys the process proceeds, the forehead
+advancing, the jaws retreating, and the nostrils leaving the lips, until
+they finally settle in a detached villa midway between the eyes and the
+mouth. This is the nose. I do not know the use of it. I cannot fathom
+the meaning of it. It is a solemn mystery. See the face of an
+orang-outang. It is a _countenance_, a signboard with three distinct
+lines of writing on it, the eyes, the nose and the mouth. You may not
+think much of this particular nose. Neither do I. I think it is
+situated rather too near the eyes and too far from the mouth. It is a
+little too small also, and wants style. But you must not judge a first
+attempt too critically. I have seen human noses of a pattern not unlike
+this, but they are not considered aristocratic: perhaps they indicate a
+reversion to the ancestral type.
+
+[Illustration: I HAVE SEEN HUMAN NOSES OF A PATTERN NOT UNLIKE THIS, BUT
+THEY ARE NOT CONSIDERED ARISTOCRATIC.]
+
+But the noses even of monkeys are not all like this. In fact, there is a
+good deal of variety, and two in particular have struck me as quite
+remarkable. One is that of the long-nosed monkey (_Semnopithecus
+nasalis_). I think it must have suggested Sterne's stranger on a mule,
+who had travelled to the promontory of noses and threw all Strassburg
+into a ferment. I have often contemplated this nose in mute wonderment,
+and longed to see that monkey in life, if so be I might arrive at some
+understanding of it; for the taxidermist cannot rise above his own
+level, and the man who would mount _S. nasalis_ would need to be a Henry
+Irving. Then there is the sub-nosed monkey, labelled _rhinopithecus_, of
+which there is an expressive specimen at the South Kensington Museum.
+Who can consider that nose seriously and continue to believe in a
+recipe made up of struggle for existence, adaptation to environment, and
+natural selection _quantum suf_.? If I could dine with that monkey, ask
+it to drink a glass of wine with me, offer it a pinch of snuff and so
+on, I might come in time to feel, if not to comprehend, the import of
+its nose.
+
+[Illustration: THE LONG-NOSED MONKEY.]
+
+[Illustration: WHO CAN CONSIDER THAT NOSE SERIOUSLY?]
+
+But one step further is required for the evolution of what we may call
+the human nose, and that is a solid foundation, a ridge of bone
+connecting it with the brow and separating the eyes from each other. I
+believe that the completeness of this is a fair index of the comparative
+advancement of different races of men. In the Greek ideal of a perfect
+face the profile forms a straight line from the top of the forehead to
+the tip of the nose. This is the type of face which painters have
+delighted to give to the Virgin Mary; and, when looking at their
+Madonnas, one cannot help wondering whether they forgot that Mary was a
+Jewess. According to the Hebrew ideal, a perfect nose was like "the
+tower of Lebanon which looketh toward Damascus" (Song of Solomon, vii.
+4); but not even the ruins of that tower remain to help us to-day. The
+Romans, no doubt, accepted the ideal of the Greeks aesthetically, but
+their destiny had given them a very different nose, and they ruled the
+world.
+
+Here is the nose of Julius Caesar as a coin has preserved it for us. I
+think that the outline is too straight for a typical Roman, but the deep
+dip under the brow and the downward point are characteristic. Now
+compare the nose of another race which rules an empire greater than that
+of the Caesars. Here is John Bull as _Punch_ usually represents him. It
+belongs to the same genus as that of the Roman. The reason why this
+should be the nose of command is not easy to give with scientific
+precision, for we are dealing with the play of very subtle influences,
+so the man without imagination will no doubt scoff. But I will take
+shelter under Darwin. Dealing with the expression of pride he says, "A
+proud man exhibits his sense of superiority by holding his head and body
+erect. He is haughty _(haut),_ or high, and makes himself appear as
+large as possible." Again, "The arrogant man looks down on others"; and
+yet again, "In some photographs of patients affected by a monomania of
+pride, sent me by Dr. Crichton-Browne, the head and body were held erect
+and the mouth firmly closed. This latter action, expressive of decision,
+follows, I presume, from the proud man feeling perfect self-confidence
+in himself."
+
+Darwin says nothing about the nose, but I believe that, by physiological
+sympathy, it cannot but take part in the habitual downward look upon
+inferior beings. Darwin goes on to say that, "The whole expression of
+pride stands in direct antithesis to that of humility"; from which it
+follows, if my philosophy is sound, that the nose of Uriah Heep was
+turned upwards.
+
+Of course, many emotions may share in the moulding of a nose, and the
+whole subject is too intricate and vast to be treated briefly. I have
+only given a few examples to illustrate my argument, and my conclusion
+is that the key to the peculiar significance and personal quality of the
+nose is to be found in its _immobility_. The eyes and lips are
+incessantly in motion, we can twitch and wrinkle the cheeks and
+forehead, and muscles to move the ears are there, though most men have
+lost control of them. But the nose stands out like some bold promontory
+on a level coast, or like the Sphinx in the Egyptian desert, with an
+ancient history, no doubt, and a mystery perhaps, but without response
+to any appeal. And for this very reason it is an index, not to that
+which is transient in the man, but to that which is permanent. He may
+knit his brows to seem thoughtful and profound, or compress his lips to
+persuade his friends and himself that he has a strong will, but he can
+play no trick with his nose. There it stands, an incorruptible witness,
+testifying to what he is, and not only to what he is, but to the rock
+whence he was hewn and to the pit whence he was digged. For his nose is
+a bequest from his ancestors, an entailed estate which he cannot
+alienate.
+
+
+
+
+V
+
+
+EARS
+
+Men and women have ears, and so have jugs and pitchers. In the latter
+case they are useful: jugs and pitchers are lifted by them. And what is
+useful is fit, and fitness is the first condition of beauty. But human
+ears are put to no use, except sometimes when naughty little boys are
+lifted by them in the way of discipline; and I can see no beauty in
+them. It is only because they are so common that we do not notice how
+ridiculous they are. In the days of Charles I. men sometimes had their
+ears cut off for holding wrong opinions, which would have made them
+famous and popular in these enlightened days, but at that time it made
+all right-thinking people despise them, so the fashion of going without
+ears did not spread among us. If it had, then how differently we should
+all think of the matter now! If we were all accustomed to neat, round
+heads at drawing-rooms, levees and balls, how repulsive it Would be to
+see a well-dressed man with two ridiculous, wrinkled appendages sticking
+out from the sides of his face!
+
+In saying this I am not drawing on my fancy, but on my memory. I can
+recollect the time when no gentleman, still less any lady, would have
+owned a terrier with its ears on. And why go back so far? The same
+sentiment is prevalent in good society with respect to men's beards in
+this year of grace and smooth faces. Yet, if one chance to be looking at
+a Rembrandt instead of at society, what an infinitely handsomer adjunct
+to a noble face is a fine beard than a pair of ears!
+
+When woman first looked at her face in a polished saucepan, she was at
+once struck with the comicality of those things, and bethought herself
+what to do with them. She decided to use them for pegs to hang ornaments
+on. The improvement excited the admiration of her husband and the envy
+of her rivals to such a degree that all other women of taste in her
+tribe did the same, and from that day to this, in almost every country
+in the world, it has been accounted a shame for any respectable woman to
+show her face in public in the hideousness of naked ears. This discovery
+of its capabilities gave a new value to the ear, and a large, roomy one
+became an asset in the marriage market. I have seen a pretty little
+damsel of Sind with fourteen jingling silver things hanging at regular
+intervals from the outside edge of each ear. If Nature had been
+niggardly, the lobe at least could be enlarged by boring it and
+thrusting in a small wooden peg, then a larger one, and so on until it
+could hold an ivory wheel as large as a quoit, and hung down to the
+shoulders.
+
+But Nature surely did not intend the ear for this purpose. Then what
+did she intend? A popular error is that the ears are given to hear with,
+but the ears cannot hear. The hearing is done by a box of assorted
+instruments (_malleus, incus, stapes_, etc.) hidden in a burrow which
+has its entrance inside of the ear. If you argue that the ears are
+intended to catch sounds and direct them down to the hearing instrument,
+then explain their absurd shape. They are useless. A man who wants to
+hear distinctly puts his hand to his ear. And why do they not turn to
+meet the sounds that come from different quarters? They are absolutely
+immovable, and therefore also expressionless. A savage expresses his
+mind with all the rest of his face; he smiles and grins and pouts and
+frowns, but his ears stand like gravestones with the inscriptions
+effaced. How different is the case when you turn from man to the
+"irrational" animals! The eyes of a fawn are lustrous and beautiful, but
+they would be as meaningless as polished stones without the eloquent
+ears that stand behind them and tell her thoughts. Curiosity, suspicion,
+alarm, anger, submission, friendliness, every emotion that flits across
+her quick, sensitive mind speaks through them. They are in touch with
+her soul, and half the music of her life is played on them. And if you
+abstract yourself from individuals and look at that thing, the ear, in
+the wide field of life, what a great, living reality it is!--a spiritual
+unity under infinite diversity of material form and fashion. It is like
+the telegraph wire overhead, the commonest and plainest of material
+things, but charged with the silent and invisible currents of the life
+of the world.
+
+"Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore."
+
+[Illustration: OR PERHAPS WHEN IT WANTS TO LISTEN IT RAISES A FLIPPER TO
+ITS EAR.]
+
+Birds have no ears, nor have crocodiles, nor frogs, nor snakes. Ears
+seem to be for beasts only. And not for all beasts. Seals are divided by
+naturalists into two great families--those with ears, and those without.
+The common seal belongs to the latter class, and the sea-lion to the
+former. A common seal lives in the sea, and when it does wriggle up on
+the beach of an iceberg there is nothing to hear, I suppose, or perhaps
+when it wants to listen it raises a flipper to its ear. I never saw one
+doing so, but we do not see everything that happens in the world. The
+sea-lion, with its stouter limbs, can lift its forepart, raise its head
+and look about it, and even flop about the ice-fields at a respectable
+rate. And there is no doubt that one of these is as much above an
+earless seal as fifty years of Europe are better than a cycle of Cathay.
+When performing seals are exhibited at a circus sitting on chairs,
+catching balls on the points of their noses and playing diabolo with
+them, or balancing billiard cues on their snouts, and doing other
+miraculous things, they are always sea-lions, not common seals. Of
+course, I do not mean to insinuate that sea-lions invented the ear and
+stuck it on: that would be unscientific; but I mean that their general
+intelligence and interest in affairs created that demand for more
+distinct hearing which led to the development of an ear trumpet. This
+view is wholly scientific, though pedants may quarrel with my way of
+putting it.
+
+The sea-lion's ears are very minute, mere apologies one might think; but
+don't be hasty. The finny prey of the sea-lion makes no sound as it
+skims through the water; and perhaps the padded foot of that stealthy
+garrotter, the Polar bear, makes as little on the smooth ice; for
+catching the one and not being caught by the other the sea-lion must
+trust to the keenness of its great goggle eyes. But it is a social
+beast, and it wants to catch the bellowing of its fellows far across
+the foggy waste of ice-floes; and that little leather scoop standing
+behind the ear-hole seems to be just the instrument required to catch
+and send down those sounds which would otherwise glance off the glossy
+fur and never find entrance to the tiny orifice at all. If it were any
+larger than is absolutely necessary it would be a serious impediment to
+a professional diver and swimmer like the sea-lion. This is the reason
+why otters have very small ears, and why whales and porpoises have none
+at all.
+
+But when a beast lives on land the conditions are all altered, and then
+the ear blossoms out into an infinite variety of forms and sizes, from
+each of which the true naturalist may divine the manner of life of its
+wearer as surely as the palmist tells your past, present and future from
+the lines on your hand. First, he will divide all beasts into those that
+pursue and those that flee, oppressors and oppressed. The former point
+their ears forwards, but the latter backwards. There may be a good deal
+of free play in both cases, but I am thinking of the habitual position.
+When a cat is making its felonious way along the garden wall, wrapped in
+thoughts of blackbirds and thrushes, its ears look straight forwards,
+and this is the way in which a cat's portrait is always taken, because
+it is characteristic, It cannot turn them round to catch sounds from
+behind, and would scorn to do so; when accosted from behind, it turns
+its head and looks danger in the face. It can fold them down backwards
+when the danger is a terrier and the decks are cleared for action, but
+that is another story. Contrast Brer Rabbit as he comes "lopin' up de
+big road," His ears are turning every way scouting for danger, not
+always in unison, but independently; but when he is at rest they are set
+to alarm from the flank and rear.
+
+[Illustration: "TEAR OUT THE HOUSE LIKE THE DOGS WUZ ATTER HIM."]
+
+But when he "tear out the house like the dogs wuz atter him," then they
+point straight back. He was made to be eaten, and he knows it. So it is
+with the whole tribe of deer, and even with the horse, pampered and
+cared for and unacquainted with danger; his ears are a weathercock
+registering the drift of all his petty hopes and fears. I see the left
+ear go forward and prepare for a desperate shy at that wheelbarrow. He
+knows a wheelbarrow familiarly--there is one in his stall all day--but I
+am taking him a road he does not want to go, and so the hypocrite is
+going to pretend that barrow is of a dangerous sort. I prepare to apply
+a counter-irritant: he sees it with the corner of his eye, and both ears
+turn back like a tuning-fork.
+
+The size and quality of the ear serve to show how far the owner depends
+on it. You will never begin to understand Nature until you see clearly
+that every life is dominated by two supreme anxieties which push aside
+all other concerns--viz., to eat, and not to be eaten. The one is
+uppermost in those that pursue, and the other in those that flee. Now if
+the pursuer fails he loses a dinner, but if the fugitive fails he loses
+his life, from which it follows that the very best sort of ears will be
+found among those beasts that do not ravage but run.
+
+But there is another matter to be taken into account. The ears are not
+the whole of the beast's outfit. It has eyes, and it has a nose. Which
+of the three it most relies on depends upon the manner of its life. A
+bird lives in trees or the air, looking down at the prowling cat or up
+at the hawk hovering in the clear sky; so it does not keep ears, and its
+nose is of no account. But what four-footed thing can see like a bird?
+The squirrel also lives in the trees, and its ears are frivolously
+decorated with tufts of hair. You will not find many beasts that can
+afford to prostitute their ears to ornamental purposes. The only other
+beast that I can think of at this moment which has tufted ears is the
+lynx. Now the lynx is a tree cat, and there is proverbial wisdom in the
+saying "Eyes like a lynx."
+
+[Illustration: A GREAT CATHOLIC CONGRESS OF DISTINGUISHED EARS.]
+
+But go to the timid beasts that spend their lives on the ground among
+grass and brushwood and woods and coppices, where murderous foes are
+prowling unseen, and you will see ears indeed--expansive, tremulous,
+turning lightly on well-oiled pivots, and catching, like large
+sea-shells, the mingled murmur of rustling leaves and snapping twigs and
+chirping insects and falling seeds, and the slight, occasional, abrupt,
+fateful sound which is none of these. It is impossible, no doubt, for us
+ever to think ourselves into the life which these beasts live--moving,
+thinking and sleeping in a circumambient atmosphere of never-ceasing
+sound; sitting, as it were, at the receiving station of a system of
+wireless telegraphy, and catching cross-currents of floating
+intelligence from all quarters, mostly undiscernible by us if we
+listened for it, but which they, by long practice, instantly locate and
+interpret without conscious effort.
+
+The zoologist classifies them under many heads. The field mouse and
+rabbits are rodentia, the deer ungulata, the kangaroos marsupialia. In
+my museum they are all one family, and their labels are their ears. In
+these days of international conferences, parliaments of religion,
+pan-everything-in-turn councils, might we not arrange for a great
+catholic congress of distinguished ears? What a glow of new life it
+would shed upon our straitened, traditional ways of thinking about the
+social problems of our humble fellow-creatures! I would exclude the
+eared owls, whose ears are a mere sport of fashion, like the hideous
+imitations of birds' wings which ladies stick on their hats.
+
+But just when this peep into the rare show of Nature is lifting my soul
+into sublimity, I am brought down to the base earth again by an
+exception. This is the plague of all high science. You design a stately
+theory, collect from many quarters a wealth of facts to establish it
+with, and have arranged them with cumulative and irresistible force,
+when some disgusting, uninvited case thrusts itself in on your notice
+and refuses to fit into your argument at all. In this instance it is
+"my lord the elephant." That he has no need to concern himself about any
+bloodthirsty beast that may be lurking in the jungle is not more obvious
+than that his ears are the biggest in the world. Now there are two ways
+of getting rid of an obstruction of this kind. One is to betake yourself
+to your thinking chair and pipe and to rake up the possibilities of the
+Pleiocene and Meiocene ages, and prove that when the immense ear of the
+elephant was evolved there must have been some carnivorous monster, some
+sabre-toothed tiger or cave bear, which preyed on elephants.
+
+The other way is to get acquainted with the elephant, cultivate an
+intimacy with him, and find out what his ears are to him. I prefer the
+second way. I would patiently watch him as he stands drowsily under an
+umbrageous banian tree on a sultry day before the monsoon has burst and
+refreshed earth and air. So might I note that his ears are incessantly
+moving, but not turning this way and that to catch sounds--just
+flapping, flapping, as if to cool his great temples. So have I seen the
+gigantic fruit bats, called flying foxes in India, hanging in hundreds
+in the upper branches of a tall peepul tree at noon, feeling too hot to
+sleep, and all fanning themselves in unison with one wing--a comic
+spectacle. And at each flap of the elephant's ears I would observe that
+a cloud of flies (for the elephant is not too great to be pestered by
+the despicable hordes of beggars for blood) were dislodged from their
+feeding grounds about his head and neck, and, trying to settle about his
+rear parts, were driven back again by the swinging of his tail. Then I
+should say that ear is just a fan. How significant it is that among the
+emblems of royalty in the East the three chiefest are an
+umbrella-bearer, two men who stand behind and swing great punkahs
+modelled on the elephant's ear, and two others carrying yak's tails
+wherewith to scare the flies from the royal person! The elephant is a
+rajah!
+
+There is another mysterious ear which is a stumbling-block to the simple
+theory-monger. It is in fashion among a tribe of bats to which belongs
+the so-called vampire of India. This monster is fond of coming into your
+bedroom at midnight through the open windows, but not to suck your
+blood, for it has little in common with the true vampire of South
+America. It brings its dinner with it and hangs from the ceiling,
+"feeding like horses when you hear them feed." You hear its jaws
+working--crunch, crunch, crunch, but feel too drowsy to get up and expel
+it.
+
+When you get up in the morning there on your clean dressing table, just
+below the place where it hung, are the bloody remains of a sparrow, or
+the crumbs of a tree-frog. The servants will tell you that the sparrow
+was killed and eaten by a rat, but if you rise softly next night when
+you hear the sound of feeding, and shut the windows, you will find a
+goblin hanging from the ceiling in the morning, hideous beyond the
+power of words to tell. Its ears, thin, membranous and longer than its
+head, tremble incessantly. Inside of them is another pair, much smaller
+than the first, and tuned to their octave, I should guess, while two
+membranous smelling trumpets of similar pattern rise over the nose. What
+is the meaning of these repulsive instruments, and how does that strange
+beast catch sparrows? When it comes out after dark and quarters the
+garden, passing swiftly under and through the branches of trees, they
+are sound asleep hidden among the leaves, motionless and silent. But
+their flesh may be scented, and their gentle breathing heard if you have
+instruments sufficiently delicate. Then the ample wings may suddenly
+enfold the sleeping body, and the savage jaws grip the startled head
+before there is time even to scream. Without a doubt this is the secret
+of the vampire bat's ears.
+
+But to find food and flee death are not the only interests in life even
+to the meanest creature. There are social pleasures, family affections
+and fellowship, sympathy and co-operation in the struggles of life. And
+there is love.
+
+ Omne adeo genus in terris hominumque ferarumque,
+ Et genus aequoreum, pecudes, pictaeque volucres,
+ In furias ignemque ruunt: amor omnibus idem.
+
+The chirping of the cricket, the song of the lark, the call of the
+sentinel crane, the watchword with which the migratory geese keep their
+squadrons together, the howling of jackals, the lowing of cows, the hum
+of the hive, the chatter of the drawing-room, and a hundred other voices
+in forest and field and town remind us that the voice and the ear are
+the pair of wheels on which society runs.
+
+And this thought points the way out of another contradictious puzzle,
+that which confronts my argument from the ears of an ass. It roams
+treeless deserts where no foe can approach unseen. Thistles make no
+sound. Why should it be adorned with ears which in their amplitude are
+scarcely surpassed by those of the rabbit and the hare. There is no
+answer unless their function is to hear the bray of a fellow-ass.... One
+may object that that majestic sound is surely of force to impress itself
+without any aid from an external ear; but that is a vain argument built
+on the costermonger's moke--dreary exile from its fatherland. Remember
+that its ancestors wandered on the steppes of Central Asia or the
+borders of the Sahara. In those boundless solitudes, with nothing that
+eye can see or that common ear can hear to remind her that she is not
+the sole inhabitant of the universe, the wild ass "snuffeth up the wind
+in her desire," and lifting her windsails to the hot blast, hears, borne
+across miles of white sand and shimmering mirage, the joyful
+reverberations of that music which tells of old comrades and boon
+companions scouring the plain and kicking up their exultant heels.
+
+Monkeys taking to trees were like the birds, they scarcely needed ears.
+And so by the high road of evolution you arrive at man and the enigma of
+his ear. It is a shrunken and shrivelled remnant, a moss-grown ruin, a
+derelict ship. It is to a pattern ear what the old shoe which you find
+in a country lane, shed from the foot of some "unemployed," is to one of
+Waukenphast's "five-miles-an-hour-easy" boots. We ought to temper our
+contempt for what it is with respect for what it was. All the parts of
+it are there and recognisable, even to the muscles that should move it,
+but we have lost control of them. I believe anyone could regain that by
+persevering exercise of his will power for a time--that is, if he has
+any. I have a friend who, if you treat him with disrespect, shrivels you
+up with a sarcastic wag of his right ear.
+
+The ears of dogs open up another vista for the questioning philosopher.
+Their day is past, too, and man may cut them short to match his own, but
+the dog grows them longer than before. When he first took service with
+man, and grew careless and lazy, the muscles got slack and the ears
+dropped, which is in accordance with Nature. Then, instead of being
+allowed to wither away, they have been handed over to the milliner and
+shaped and trimmed in harmony with the "style" of each breed of dogs.
+How it has been done is one of those mysteries which will not open to
+the iron keys of Darwin, But there it is for those to see who have eyes.
+
+[Illustration: THE CURLS OF A MOTHER'S DARLING.]
+
+The ears of the little dogs bred for ladies' laps are the curls of a
+mother's darling; the pendant love-locks of the old, old maid who,
+despite of changeful fashions, clings to those memorials of the pensive
+beauty of her youth, are repeated in solemn mimicry by the dachshund
+trotting at her heels; but the sensible fur cap of the dignified
+Newfoundland reminds us of the cold regions from which his forefathers
+came. Some kinds of terriers still have their ears starched up to look
+perky, and I have occasionally seen a dog with one ear up and the other
+down as if straining after the elusive idea expressed in the
+Baden-Powell hat. All which shows that "one touch of nature makes the
+whole world kin."
+
+
+
+
+VI
+
+
+TOMMY
+
+THE STORY OF AN OWL
+
+Among the many and various strangers within my gates who have helped to
+enliven the days of my exile, Tommy was one towards whom I still feel a
+certain sense of obligation because he taught me for the first time what
+an owl is. For Tommy was an owl. From any dictionary you may ascertain
+that an owl is a nocturnal, carnivorous bird, of a short, stout form,
+with downy feathers and a large head; and if that does not satisfy you,
+there is no lack of books which will furnish fuller and more precise
+descriptions.
+
+But descriptions cannot impart acquaintance. I had sought acquaintance
+and had gained some knowledge such as books cannot supply, not only of
+owls in general, but of that particular species of owls to which Tommy
+belonged, who, in the heraldry of ornithology, was _Carine brahma_, an
+Indian spotted owlet. This branch of the ancient family of owls has
+always been eccentric. It does not mope and to the moon complain. It
+flouts the moon and the sun and everyone who passes by, showing its
+round face at its door and even coming out, at odd times of the day, to
+stare and bob and play the clown. It does not cry "Tuwhoo, Tuwhoo," as
+the poets would have it, but laughs, jabbers, squeaks and chants
+clamorous duets with its spouse.
+
+All this I knew. I had also gathered from his public appearances that a
+spotted owlet is happy in his domestic life and that he is fond of fat
+white ants, for, when their winged swarms were flying, I had seen him
+making short flights from his perch in a tree and catching them with his
+feet; and I believed that he fed in secret on mice and lizards. But all
+that did not amount to understanding an owl, as I discovered when Tommy
+became a member of our chummery.
+
+Tommy was born in "the second city of the British Empire," to wit,
+Bombay, in the month of March, 1901. His birthplace was a hole in an old
+"Coral" tree. Domestic life in that hole was not conducted with
+regularity. Meals were at uncertain hours and uncertain also in their
+quantity and quality. The parents were hunters and were absent for long
+periods, and though there was incredible shouting and laughter when they
+returned, they came at such irregular times that we did not suspect that
+they were permanent residents and had a family. One night, however,
+Tommy, being precocious and, as we discovered afterwards, keen on seeing
+life, took advantage of parental absence to clamber to the entrance of
+the nursery and, losing his balance, toppled over into the garden. He
+kept cool, however, and tried to conceal himself, but Hurree the malee,
+watering the plants early in the morning, spied him lying with his face
+on the earth and brought him to us.
+
+He seemed dead, but he was very much alive, as appeared when he was made
+to sit up and turned those wonderful eyes of his upon us. He was a droll
+little object at that time, nearly globular in form and covered with
+down, like a toy for children to play with. His head turned like a
+revolving lighthouse and flared those eyes upon you wherever you went,
+great luminous orbs, black-centred and gold-ringed and full of silent
+wonder, or, I should rather say, surprise. This never left him. To the
+last everything that presented itself to his gaze, though he had seen it
+a hundred times, seemed to fill him with fresh surprise. Nothing ever
+became familiar. What an enviable cast of mind! It must make the
+brightness of childhood perennial.
+
+There was some discussion as to how Tommy should be fed, and we finally
+decided that one should try to open the small hooked beak, whose point
+could just be detected protruding from a nest of fluff, while another
+held a piece of raw meat ready to pop in. It did not look an easy job,
+but we had scarcely set about it when Tommy himself solved the
+difficulty by plucking the meat out of our fingers and swallowing it.
+This early intimation that, however absent he might look, he was "all
+there" was never belied, and there was no further difficulty about the
+feeding of him. When he saw us coming he always fell into the same
+ridiculous attitude, with his face in the dust, but we just picked him
+up and stood him on his proper end and showed him the meat and his
+bashfulness vanished at once.
+
+After sunset he would get lively and begin calling for his mother in a
+strange husky voice. At this time we would let him out in the garden,
+watching him closely, for, if he thought he was alone, he would sneak
+away slyly, then make a run for liberty, hobbling along at a good rate
+with the aid of his wings, though he never attempted to fly as yet. When
+detected and overtaken, he fell on his face as before. One memorable day
+he found a hole in a stone wall and, before we could stop him, he was
+in. The hole was too small to admit a hand, though not a rat or a snake,
+so the prospect was gloomy. Suddenly a happy inspiration came to me.
+That sad, husky cry with which he expressed his need of a mother was not
+difficult to mimic, and he might be cheated into thinking that a lost
+brother or sister was looking for him. I retired and made the attempt,
+and, hark! a faint echo came from the wall. At each repetition it became
+clearer, until the round face and great eyes appeared at the mouth of
+the hole. Then the round body tumbled out, and little Tommy was hobbling
+about, looking, with pathetic eagerness, for "the old familiar faces."
+When he discovered how he had been betrayed, his face went down and he
+suffered himself to be carried quietly to the canary's cage in which he
+was kept.
+
+It seemed to be time now to begin Tommy's education, for I judged that,
+if he had been at home, he would ere then have been getting nightly
+lessons in the poacher's art. So I procured a small gecko, one of those
+grey house lizards, with pellets at the ends of their toes, which come
+down from the roof after the lamps are lit and gorge themselves on the
+foolish moths and plant bugs that come to the light. Securing it with a
+thin cord tied round its waist, I introduced it into Tommy's cage. He
+looked surprised, very much surprised. He raised himself to his full
+height. He gazed at it. He curtseyed. He gave a little jump and was
+standing with both feet on the lizard. A moment more and the lizard was
+gliding down his throat with my thin cord after it. Mr. Seton Thompson
+would have us believe that all young things are laboriously trained by
+their parents, just like human children, and if he was an eye-witness of
+all the scenes that he describes so vividly, it must be so with other
+young things. But he did not know Tommy, who is the bird of Minerva and
+evidently sprang into being, like his patron goddess, with all his
+armour on.
+
+After a time, when he had exchanged his infant down for a suit of
+feathers, he was promoted to a large cage out in the garden, and his
+regular diet was a little raw meat or a mutton bone tied to one of his
+perches, but, by way of a treat, I would offer him, whenever I could get
+it, a locust, or large grasshopper. His way of accepting this was unique
+and pretty. He would look surprised, stare, curtsey once or twice, stare
+again and then, suddenly, noiselessly and as lightly as a fairy, flit
+across the cage and, without alighting, pluck the insect from my fingers
+with both his feet and return to his perch.
+
+Why he bowed to his food and to everybody and everything that presented
+itself before him was a riddle that I never solved. A materialistic
+friend suggested that he was adjusting the focus of his wonderful eyes,
+and the action was certainly like that of an optician examining a lens;
+but I feel that there was something more ceremonial about it. This
+punctiliousness cost him his dinner once. I was curious to know what he
+would do with a mouse, so, having caught one alive, I slipped it quietly
+into his cage. He was more surprised than ever before, raised himself
+erect, bowed to the earth once, twice and three times, stared, bowed
+again and so on until, to his evident astonishment and chagrin, the
+mouse found an opening and was gone. The lesson was not lost. A few days
+later I got another mouse, to which he began to do obeisance as before,
+but very soon and suddenly, though as softly as falling snow, he plumped
+upon it with both feet and, spreading his wings on the ground, looked
+all round him with infinite satisfaction. The mouse squeaked, but he
+stopped that by cracking its skull quietly with his beak. Then he
+gathered himself up and flew to the perch with his prize.
+
+One thing I noted about Tommy most emphatically. He never showed a sign
+of affection, or what is called attachment. He maintained a strictly
+bowing acquaintance with me. He was not afraid, but he would suffer no
+familiarity. He would come and eat, with due ceremony, out of my hand,
+but if I offered to touch him he was surprised and affronted and went
+off at once. When I moved to another house I found that I could not
+continue to keep him, so I sent him to the zoological garden, where I
+visited him sometimes, but he never vouchsafed a token of recognition.
+His heart was locked except to his own kin.
+
+But since that time, when I have seen an owl, even a barn owl, or a
+great horned owl, swiftly cross the sky in the darkness of night, I have
+felt that I could accompany it, in imagination, on its secret quest. It
+will arrive silently, like the angel of death, in a tree overlooking a
+field in which a rat, whose hour has come, is furtively feeding, all
+alert and tremulous, but unaware of any impending danger. The rat will
+go on feeding, unconscious of the mocking curtsey and the baleful eyes
+that follow with mute attention its every motion, until the hand of the
+clock has moved to the point assigned by fate, and then it will feel
+eight sharp talons plunged into its flesh. I have seen the fierce dash
+of the sparrow hawk into a crowd of unsuspecting sparrows, I know the
+triumph of the falcon as it rises for the final, fatal swoop on the
+flying duck, and I have watched the kestrel, high in air, scanning the
+field for some rash mouse or lizard that has wandered too far from
+shelter. The owl is also a bird of prey, but its idea is different from
+all these.
+
+
+
+
+VII
+
+
+THE BARN OWL
+
+A FRIEND OF MAN
+
+A thunderstorm has burst on the common rat. Its complicity in the spread
+of the plague, which has been proved up to the hilt, has filled the cup
+of its iniquities to overflowing, and we have awakened to the fact that
+it is and always has been an arch-enemy of mankind. Simultaneously, in
+widely separated parts of the world, a "pogrom" has been proclaimed, and
+the accounts of the massacre which come to us from great cities like
+Calcutta and Bombay are appalling and almost incredible. They would move
+to pity the most callous heart, if pity could be associated with the
+rat. But it cannot.
+
+The wild rat deserves that humane consideration to which all our natural
+fellow-creatures on this earth are entitled; but the domestic rat (I use
+this term advisedly, for though man has not domesticated it, it has
+thoroughly domesticated itself) cannot justify its existence. It is a
+fungus of civilisation. If it confined itself to its natural food, the
+farmer's grain, the tax which it levies on the country would still be
+such as no free people ought to endure. But it confines itself to
+nothing. As Waterton says: "After dining on carrion in the filthiest
+sink, it will often manage to sup on the choicest dainties of the
+larder, where like Celoeno of old _vestigia foeda relinquit_." It kills
+chickens, plunders the nests of little birds, devouring mother, eggs and
+young, murders and feeds on its brothers and sisters and even its own
+offspring, and not infrequently tastes even man when it finds him
+asleep. The bite of a rat is sometimes very poisonous, and I have had to
+give three months' sick leave to a clerk who had been bitten by one. Add
+to this that the rat multiplies at a rate which is simply criminal,
+rearing a family of perhaps a dozen every two or three months, and no
+further argument is needed to justify the war which has been declared
+against it. Every engine of war will, no doubt, be brought into use,
+traps of many kinds, poisons, cats, the professional rat-catcher, and a
+rat bacillus which, if once it gets a footing, is expected to originate
+a fearful epidemic.
+
+But I need not linger any more among rats, which are not my subject. I
+am writing in the hope that this may be an opportune time to put in a
+plea for a much persecuted native of this and many other countries,
+whose principal function in the economy of nature is to kill rats and
+mice. The barn, or screech, owl, which is found over a great part of
+Europe and Asia and also in America, was once very common in Britain,
+inhabiting every "ivy-mantled tower," church steeple, barn loft, hollow
+tree, or dovecot, in which it could get a lodging. But it was never
+welcome. Like the Jews in the days of King John it has been relentlessly
+persecuted by superstition, ignorance and avarice. Avarice, instigated
+by ladies and milliners, has looked with covetous eye on its downy and
+beautiful plumes; while ignorance and superstition have feared and hated
+the owl in all countries and all ages. In ancient Rome it was a bird of
+evil omen.
+
+ Foedaque fit volucris venturi nuncia luctus,
+ Ignavus bubo, dirum mortalibus omen.
+
+In India, to-day, if an owl sits on the house-top, the occupants dare
+scarcely lie down to sleep, for they know that the devil is walking the
+rooms and marking someone for death. Lady Macbeth, when about the murder
+of Duncan, starts and whispers,
+
+ Hark! Peace! It was the owl that shrieked,
+ The fatal bellman.
+
+And even as late as the nineteenth century, Waterton's aged housekeeper
+"knew full well what sorrow it had brought into other houses when she
+was a young woman," Witches, like modern ladies of fashion, set great
+value on its wings. The latter stick them on their hats, the witches in
+Macbeth threw them into their boiling cauldron. Horace's Canidia could
+not complete her recipe without
+
+ "Plumamque nocturnae strigis."
+
+We may suppose that in Britain these superstitions are gone for ever,
+killed and buried by board schools and compulsory education. If they are
+(there is room for an _if_) they have been succeeded by a worse, the
+superstition of gamekeepers and farmers. It is worse in effect, because
+these men have guns, which their predecessors had not. And it is more
+wicked, because it is founded on an ignorance for which there is no
+excuse. How little harm the barn owl is likely to do game may be
+inferred from the fact that, when it makes its lodging in a dovecot, the
+pigeons suffer no concern! Waterton (and no better authority could be
+quoted) scouts the idea, common among farmers, that its business there
+is to eat the pigeons' eggs. "They lay the saddle," he says, "on the
+wrong horse. They ought to put it on the rat." His predecessor in the
+estate had allowed the owls to be destroyed and the rats to multiply,
+and there were few young pigeons in the dovecot. Waterton took strong
+measures to exterminate the rats, but built breeding places for the
+owls, and the dovecot, which they constantly frequented, became prolific
+again.
+
+But granting that the owls did twice the injury to game with which they
+are credited, it would be repaid many times over by their services.
+Waterton well says that, if we knew its utility in thinning the country
+of mice, it would be with us what the ibis was with the Egyptians--a
+sacred bird. He examined the pellets ejected by a pair of owls that
+occupied a ruined gateway on the estate. Every pellet contained
+skeletons of from four to seven mice. Owls, it may be necessary to
+explain, swallow their food without separating flesh from bone, skin and
+hair, and afterwards disgorge the indigestible portions rolled up into
+little balls. In sixteen months the pair of owls above-mentioned had
+accumulated a deposit of more than a bushel of these pellets, each a
+funeral urn of from four to seven mice! In the old Portuguese fort of
+Bassein in Western India I noticed that the earth at the foot of a
+ruined tower was plentifully mixed with small skulls, jaws and other
+bones. Taking home a handful and examining them, I found that they were
+the remains of rats, mice and muskrats.
+
+The owl kills small birds, large insects, frogs and even fishes, but
+these are extras: its profession is rat-catching and mousing, and only
+those who have a very intimate personal acquaintance with it know how
+peculiarly its equipment and methods are adapted to this work. The
+falcon gives open chase to the wild duck, keeping above it if possible
+until near enough for a last spurt; then it comes down at a speed which
+is terrific, and, striking the duck from above, dashes it to the ground.
+The sparrow hawk plunges unexpectedly into a group of little birds and
+nips up one with a long outstretched foot before they have time to get
+clear of each other. The harrier skims over field, copse and meadow,
+suddenly rounding corners and topping fences and surprising small
+birds, or mice, on which it drops before they have recovered from their
+surprise.
+
+The owl does none of these things. For one thing, it hunts in the night,
+when its sight is keenest and rats are abroad feeding. Its flight is
+almost noiseless and yet marvellously light and rapid when it pleases.
+Sailing over field, lane and hedgerow and examining the ground as it
+goes, it finds a likely place and takes a post of observation on a fence
+perhaps, or a sheaf of corn. Here it sits, bolt upright, all eyes. It
+sees a rat emerge from the grass and advance slowly, as it feeds, into
+open ground. There is no hurry, for the doom of that rat is already
+fixed. So the owl just sits and watches till the right moment has
+arrived; then it flits swiftly, softly, silently, across the intervening
+space and drops like a flake of snow. Without warning, or suspicion of
+danger, the rat feels eight sharp claws buried in its flesh. It protests
+with frantic squeals, but these are stopped with a nip that crunches its
+skull, and the owl is away with it to the old tower, where the hungry
+children are calling, with weird, impatient hisses, for something to
+eat.
+
+The owl does not hunt the fields and hedgerows only. It goes to all
+places where rats or mice may be, reconnoitres farmyards, barns and
+dwelling houses and boldly enters open windows. Sometimes it hovers in
+the air, like a kestrel, scanning the ground below. And though its
+regular hunting hours are from dusk till dawn, it has been seen at work
+as late as nine or ten on a bright summer morning. But the vulgar boys
+of bird society are fond of mobbing it when it appears abroad by day,
+and it dislikes publicity.
+
+The barn owl lays its eggs in the places which it inhabits. There is
+usually a thick bed of pellets on the floor, and it considers no other
+nest needful. The eggs are said to be laid in pairs. There may be two,
+four, or six, of different eggs, in the nest, and perhaps a young one,
+or two, at the same time. Eggs are found from April, or even March, till
+June or July, and there is, sometimes at any rate, a second brood as
+late as November or December. This owl does not hoot, but screeches. A
+weird and ghostly voice it is, from which, according to Ovid, the bird
+has its Latin name, Strix (pronounced "Streex," probably, at that time).
+
+ Est illis strigibus nomen, sed nominis hujus.
+ Causa, quod horrenda stridere nocte silent.
+
+It is a sound which, coming suddenly out of the darkness, might well
+start fears and forebodings in the dark and guilty mind of untutored
+man, which would not be dispelled by a nearer view of the strange object
+from which they proceeded. White, ghostly, upright, spindle-shaped and
+biggest at the top, where two great orbs flare, like fiery bull's-eyes,
+from the centres of two round white targets, it stands solemn and
+speechless; you approach nearer and it falls into fearsome pantomimic
+attitudes and grimaces, like a clown trying to frighten a child. And now
+a new horror has been added to the barn owl. The numerous letters which
+appeared in _The Times_ and were summarised, with comments, by Sir T.
+Digby Pigott, C.B., in _The Contemporary Review_ of July 1908, leave no
+reasonable room for doubt that this bird sometimes becomes brightly
+luminous, and is the will-o'-the-wisp for believing in which we are
+deriding our forefathers. All things considered, I cannot withhold my
+sympathy and some respect for the superstition of aged housekeepers,
+Romans and Indians. For that of gamekeepers and farmers I have neither.
+All our new schemes of "Nature study" will surely deserve the reproach
+of futility if, in the next generation, every farmhouse in England has
+not its own Owl Tower for the encouragement of this friend of man.
+
+
+
+
+VIII
+
+
+DOMESTIC ANIMALS
+
+Long before Jubal became the father of all such as handle the harp and
+the organ and Tubalcain the instructor of every artificer in brass and
+iron, Abel was a keeper of sheep, but the sacred writer has not informed
+us how he first caught them and tamed them. If we consult other records
+of the infancy of the human race, they reveal as little. When the
+Egyptians began to portray their daily life on stone 6,000 or 7,000
+years ago, they already had cattle and sheep, geese and ducks and dogs
+and plenty of asses, though not horses. They got these from the
+Assyrians, who had used them in their chariots long before they began to
+record anything.
+
+Further back than this we have no one to question except those shadowy
+men of the Stone Age who have left us heaps of their implements, but
+none of their bones. They were not so careful of the bones of horses,
+which lie in thousands about the precincts of their untidy villages, but
+not a scrawl on a bit of a mammoth tusk has been found to indicate
+whether these were ridden and driven, or only hunted and eaten.
+
+Why should it be recorded that Cadmus invented letters? Why should we
+inquire who first made gunpowder and glass? Why should every schoolboy
+be taught that Watt was the inventor of the steam engine? Can any of
+these be put in the scale, as benefactors of our race, with the man who
+first trained a horse to carry him on its back, or drew milk with his
+hands from the udders of a cow? The familiarity of the thing has made us
+callous to the wonder of it. Let us put it before us, like a painting or
+a statue, and have a good look at it.
+
+There is a farmhouse, any common farmhouse, just one of the molecules
+that constitute the mass of our wholesome country life. A horse is being
+harnessed for the plough: its ancestors sniffed the wind on the steppes
+of Tartary. Meek cows are standing to be milked: when primitive man
+first knew them in their native forests he used to give them a wide
+berth, for his flint arrows fell harmless off their tough hides, and
+they were fierce exceedingly. A cock is crowing on the fence as if the
+whole farm belonged to himself: he ought to be skulking in an Indian
+jungle. The sheep have no business here; their place is on the rocky
+mountains of Asia. As for the dog, it is difficult to assign it a
+country, for it owns no wild kindred in any part of the world, but it
+ought at least to be worrying the sheep. If there is an ass, it is a
+native of Abyssinia, and the Turkeys are Americans. The cat derives its
+descent from an Egyptian.
+
+But all these are of one country now and of one religion. They know no
+home nor desire any, except the farmhouse, in which they were born and
+bred, and the lord of it is their lord, to whom they look for food and
+protection. And what would he do without them? What should we do without
+them? It is impossible to conceive that life could be carried on if we
+were deprived of these obedient and uncomplaining servants. High
+civilisation has been attained without steam engines; education, as we
+use the term now, is superfluous--Runjeet Singh, the Lion of the Punjab,
+could neither read nor write; the human race has prospered and
+multiplied without the knowledge of iron; but we know of no time when
+man did without domestic animals.
+
+It is vain to speculate how the thing first came about, whether the
+sportive anthropoid ape took to riding on a wild goat before he emerged
+as a man keeping flocks, or whether some great pioneer, destined to be
+worshipped in after ages as a demigod, showed his fellows how the wild
+calves, if taken young, might be trained into tractable slaves; and it
+is hopeless to expect that any record will now leap to light which will
+give us knowledge in place of speculation. But it might not be
+unprofitable to seek for some clue to the strange selection which the
+domesticating genius of man has made from among the multifarious
+material presented to it by the animal kingdom. If we do so we shall
+almost be forced to the conclusion that domesticability is a character,
+or quality, inherent in some animals and entirely wanting in others.
+
+Let us begin with pigeons, a very large group, but one that shows more
+unity than any of the other Orders into which naturalists divide birds.
+It embraces turtle doves of many species, wood pigeons, ground pigeons,
+fruit pigeons and some strange forms like the great crowned pigeon of
+Victoria. Of all these only one, the common blue rock, has been
+domesticated. The ring dove of Asia has been kept as a cage bird for so
+long that a permanent albino and also a fawn-coloured variety have been
+established and are more common in aviaries than birds of the natural
+colour; but the ring dove has not become a domestic fowl, and never
+will. In this instance there is a plausible explanation, for the blue
+rock, unlike the rest of the tribe, nests and roosts in holes and is
+also gregarious; therefore, if provided with accommodation of the kind
+it requires, it will form a permanent settlement and remain with us on
+the same terms as the honey bee; while the ring dove, not caring for a
+fixed home, must be confined, however tame it may become, or it will
+wander and be lost.
+
+But this explanation will not fit other cases. What a multitude of wild
+ducks there are in Scotland and every other country, mallards, pintails,
+gadwalls, widgeons, pochards and teals, all very much alike in their
+habits and tastes! But of them all only one species, and that a
+migratory one, the mallard, has been persuaded to abandon its wandering
+ways and settle down to a life of ease and obesity as a dependant of
+man. In India there is a duck of the same genus as the mallard, known as
+the spotted-billed duck (_Anas poecilorhynchus_), which is as large as
+the mallard and quite as tasty, and is, moreover, not migratory, but
+remains and breeds in the country. But it has not been domesticated: the
+tame ducks in India, as here, are all mallards. The muscovy duck is a
+distinct species which has been domesticated elsewhere and introduced.
+
+From the ducks let us turn to the hens. The partridge, grouse and
+pheasant are all dainty birds, but if we desire to eat them we must
+shoot them, or (_proh pudor!_) snare them. Plover's eggs are worth four
+shillings a dozen, but we must seek them on the moors. The birds that
+have covenanted to accept our food and protection and lay their eggs for
+our use and rear their young for us to kill are descended from _Gallus
+bankivus_, the jungle fowl of Eastern India. How they came here history
+records not: perhaps the gipsies brought them. They appear now in
+strange and diverse guise, the ponderous and feather-legged
+Cochin-China, the clean-limbed and wiry game, the crested Houdan, the
+Minorca with its monstrous comb, and the puny bantam. In Japan there is
+a breed that carries a tail seven or eight feet in length, which has to
+be "done" regularly like a lady's hair, to keep it from dirt and damage.
+
+But however their outward aspects may differ, they are of the same
+blood and know it. A featherweight bantam cock will stand up to an
+elephantine brahma and fight him according to the rules of the ring and
+next minute pay compliments to his lady in language which she will be at
+no loss to understand. And if the artificial conditions of their life
+were removed, they would soon all lapse alike to the image of the stock
+from which they are sprung. This is well illustrated in a show case in
+the South Kensington Museum exhibiting a group of fowls from Pitcairn's
+Island. These are descended from some stock landed by the mutinous crew
+of H.M.S. _Bounty_ in 1790, which ran wild, and in a century they have
+gone back to the small size and lithe figure and almost to the game
+colour of the wild birds from which they branched off before history
+dawned.
+
+If we turn next to the Ruminants, the clean beasts which chew the cud
+and divide the hoof, the puzzle becomes harder still. Deer and antelopes
+are often kept as pets, and become so tame that they are allowed to
+wander at liberty. In Egypt herds of gazelles were so kept before the
+days of Cheops. In India I have known a black buck which regularly
+attended the station cricket ground, moving among the nervous players
+with its nose in the air and insolence in its gait, fully aware that
+eighteen-inch horns with very sharp points insured respectful treatment.
+Mr. Sterndale trained a Neilghai to go in harness. The great bovine
+antelopes of Africa would become as tame, and there is no reason to
+suppose that their beef and milk would not be as good as those of the
+cow. But no antelope or deer appears ever to have been domesticated,
+with the exception of the reindeer.
+
+Of the other ruminants the ox, buffalo, yak, goat, sheep and a few
+others are domestic animals, while the bison and the gaur, or so-called
+Indian bison, and a large number of wild goats and sheep have been
+neglected. The buffalo and yak have probably come under the yoke in
+comparatively recent times, for they are little changed; but the goat
+and still more the sheep have undergone a wonderful transformation
+within and without. Who could recognise in a Leicester ewe the wary
+denizen of precipitous mountains which will not feed until it has set a
+sentinel to give warning if danger approaches? And here is a curious
+fact which has scarcely been noticed by naturalists.
+
+The original of our goat is supposed to be the Persian ibex. At any
+rate, it was an ibex of some species, as its horns plainly show. But on
+the plains of Northern India, under ranges of hills on which the Persian
+ibex wanders wild, the common domestic goat is a very different animal
+from that of Europe, and has peculiar spiral horns of the same pattern
+as the markhor, another grand species of wild goat which draws eager
+hunters to the higher reaches of the same mountains. From this it would
+appear that two species of wild goat have been domesticated and kept to
+some extent distinct, one eventually finding its way westward, but not
+eastward and southward.
+
+The Indian humped cattle also differ so widely in form, structure and
+voice from those of Europe that there can scarcely be a doubt of their
+descent from distinct species. But both have entirely disappeared as
+wild animals, unless indeed the white cattle of Chillingham are really
+descendants of Caesar's dreadful urus and not merely domestic cattle
+lapsed into savagery. So have the camel, and, with a similar possible
+exception, the horse. Was the whole race in each of these cases
+subjugated, or exterminated, and that by uncivilised man with his
+primitive weapons? There is no analogy here with the extinction of such
+animals as the mammoth, for the ox is a beast in every way fitted to
+live and thrive in the present condition of this world, as much so as
+the buffalo and the Indian bison, which show no sign of approaching
+extinction. Our fathers easily got rid of the difficulty by assuming
+that Noah never released these species after the Flood, but what shall
+those do who cannot believe in the literality of Noah's ark?
+
+As for the dog, its domestication has been the creation of a new
+species. The material was perhaps the wolf, more likely the jackal, but
+possibly a blend of more than one species. But a dog is now a dog and
+neither a wolf nor a jackal. A mastiff, a pug, a collie, a greyhound, a
+pariah all recognise each other and observe the same rules of etiquette
+when they meet.
+
+We must admit, however, that, whatever pliability of disposition, or
+other inherent suitability, led to the first domestication of certain
+species of animals, the changes induced in their natures by many
+generations of domesticity have made them amenable to man's control to a
+degree which puts a wide difference between them and their wild
+relations. A wild ass, though brought up from its birth in a stable,
+would make a very intractable costermonger's moke. We may infer from
+this that the first subjugation of each of our common domestic animals
+was the achievement of some genius, or of some tribe favourably
+situated, and that they spread from that centre by sale or barter,
+rather than that they were separately domesticated in many places. This
+would partly explain why a few species of widely different families are
+so universally kept in all countries to the exclusion of hundreds of
+species nearly allied and apparently as suitable. When a want could be
+supplied by obtaining from another country an animal bred to live with
+man and serve him, the long and difficult task of softening down the
+wild instincts of a beast taken from the forests or the hills and
+acclimatising its constitution to a domestic life was not likely to be
+attempted.
+
+But there have been a few recent additions to our list of domestic
+animals. The turkey and the guinea fowl are examples, and perhaps
+within another generation we may be able to add the zebra. And there may
+be many other animals fitted to enrich and adorn human life which would
+make no insuperable resistance to domestication if wisely and patiently
+handled. Here is a noble opening for carrying out in its kindest sense
+the command, "Multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have
+dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and
+over every living thing that moveth upon the face of the earth."
+
+
+
+
+IX
+
+
+SNAKES
+
+I have met persons, otherwise quite sane, who told me that they would
+like to visit India if it were not for the _snakes_. Now there is
+something very depressing in the thought that this state of mind is
+extant in England, for it is calculated, on occasion, to have results of
+a most melancholy nature. By way of example, let us picture the case of
+a broken-hearted maiden forced to reject an ardent lover because duty
+calls him to a land where there are snakes. Think of his happiness
+blighted for ever and her doomed to a "perpetual maidenhood," harrowed
+with remorseful dreams of the hourly perils and horrors through which he
+must be passing without her, and dreading to enter an academy or
+picture-gallery lest a laocoon or a fury might revive apprehensions too
+horrible to be borne. In view of possibilities so dreadful, surely it is
+a duty that a man owes to his kind to disseminate the truth, if he can,
+about the present condition in the East of that reptile which, crawling
+on its belly and eating dust and having its head bruised by the
+descendants of Eve, sometimes pays off her share of the curse on their
+heels. Here the truth is.
+
+Within the limits of our Indian Empire, including Burmah and Ceylon,
+there are at present known to naturalists two hundred and sixty-four
+species of snakes. Twenty-seven of these are sea-serpents, which never
+leave the sea, and could not if they would. The remaining two hundred
+and thirty-seven species comprise samples of every size and pattern of
+limbless reptile found on this globe, from the gigantic python, which
+crushes a jackal and swallows it whole, to the little burrowing
+_Typhlops_, whose proportions are those of an earthworm and its food
+white ants.
+
+If you have made up your mind never to touch a snake or go nearer to one
+than you can help, then I need scarcely tell you what you know already,
+that these are all alike hideous and repulsive in their aspect, being
+smeared from head to tail with a viscous and venomous slime, which, as
+your Shakespeare will tell you, leaves a trail even on fig-leaves when
+they have occasion to pass over such. This preparation would appear to
+line them inside as well as out, for there is no lack of ancient and
+modern testimony to the fact that they "slaver" their prey all over
+before swallowing it, that it may slide the more easily down their
+ghastly throats. Their eye is cruel and stony, and possesses a peculiar
+property known as "fascination," which places their victims entirely at
+their mercy. They have also the power of coiling themselves up like a
+watch-spring and discharging themselves from a considerable distance at
+those whom they have doomed to death--a fact which is attested by such
+passages in the poets as--
+
+ Like adder darting from his coil,
+
+and by travellers _passim_.
+
+This is the true faith with respect to all serpents, and if you are
+resolved to remain steadfast in it, you may do so even in India, for it
+is possible to live in that country for months, I might almost say
+years, without ever getting a sight of a live snake except in the basket
+of a snake-charmer. If, however, you are minded to cultivate an
+acquaintance with them, it is not difficult to find opportunities of
+doing so, but I must warn you that it will be with jeopardy to your
+faith, for the very first thing that will strike you about them will
+probably be their cleanness. What has become of the classical slime I
+cannot tell, but it is a fact that the skin of a modern snake is always
+delightfully dry and clean, and as smooth to the touch as velvet.
+
+The next thing that attracts attention is their beauty, not so much the
+beauty of their colours as of their forms. With few exceptions, snakes
+are the most graceful of living things. Every position into which they
+put themselves, and every motion of their perfectly proportioned forms,
+is artistic. The effect of this is enhanced by their gentleness and the
+softness of their movements.
+
+But if you want to see them properly, you must be careful not to
+frighten them, for there is no creature more timid at heart than a
+snake. One will sometimes let you get quite near to it and watch it,
+simply because it does not notice you, being rather deaf and very
+shortsighted, but when it does discover your presence, its one thought
+is to slip away quietly and hide itself. It is on account of this
+extreme timidity that we see them so seldom.
+
+Of the two hundred and thirty-seven kinds that I have referred to, some
+are, of course, very rare, or only found in particular parts of the
+country, but at least forty or fifty of them occur everywhere, and some
+are as plentiful as crows. Yet they keep themselves out of our way so
+successfully that it is quite a rare event to meet with one.
+Occasionally one finds its way into a house in quest of frogs, lizards,
+musk-rats, or some other of the numerous malefactors that use our
+dwellings as cities of refuge from the avenger, and it is discovered by
+the Hamal behind a cupboard, or under a carpet. He does the one thing
+which it occurs to a native to do in any emergency--viz. raises an
+alarm. Then there is a general hubbub, servants rush together with the
+longest sticks they can find, the children are hurried away to a place
+of safety, the master appears on the scene, armed with his gun, and the
+
+ Wee, sleekit, cowrin', tim'rous beastie,
+
+trying to slip away from the fuss which it dislikes so much, is headed,
+and blown, or battered, to pieces. Then its head is pounded to a jelly,
+for the servants are agreed that, if this precaution is omitted, it will
+revive during the night and come and coil itself on the chest of its
+murderer.
+
+Finally a council is held and a unanimous resolution recorded that
+deceased was a serpent of the deadliest kind. This is not a lie, for
+they believe it; but in the great majority of cases it is an untruth. Of
+our two hundred and thirty-seven kinds of snakes only forty-four are
+ranked by naturalists as venomous, and many of these are quite incapable
+of killing any animal as large as a man. Others are very rare or local.
+In short, we may reckon the poisonous snakes with which we have any
+practical concern at four kinds, and the chance of a snake found in the
+house belonging to one of these kinds stands at less than one in ten.
+
+It is a sufficiently terrible thought, however, that there are even four
+kinds of reptiles going silently about the land whose bite is certain
+death. If they knew their powers and were maliciously disposed, our life
+in the East would be like Christian's progress through the Valley of the
+Shadow of Death. But the poisonous snakes are just as timid as the rest,
+and as little inclined to act on the offensive against any living
+creature except the little animals on which they prey. Even a trodden
+worm will turn, and a snake has as much spirit as a worm. If a man
+treads on it, it will turn and bite him. But it has no desire to be
+trodden on. It does its best to avoid that mischance, and, I need
+scarcely say, so does a man unless he is drunk. When both parties are
+sincerely anxious to avoid a collision, a collision is not at all likely
+to occur, and the fact is that, of all forms of death to which we are
+exposed in India, death by snake-bite is about the one which we have
+least reason to apprehend.
+
+During a pretty long residence in India I have heard of only one
+instance of an Englishman being killed by a snake. It was in Manipur,
+and I read of it in the newspapers. During the same time I have heard of
+only one death by lightning and one by falling into the fermenting vat
+of a brewery, so I suppose these accidents are equally uncommon. Eating
+oysters is much more fatal: I have heard of at least four or five deaths
+from that cause.
+
+The natives are far more exposed to danger from snakes than we are,
+because they go barefoot, by night as well as day, through fields and
+along narrow, overgrown footpaths about their villages. The tread of a
+barefooted man does not make noise enough to warn a snake to get out of
+his way, and if he treads on one, there is nothing between its fangs and
+his skin. Again, the huts of the natives, being made of wattle and daub
+and thatched with straw, offer to snakes just the kind of shelter that
+they like, and the wonder is that naked men, sleeping on the ground in
+such places, and poking about dark corners, among their stores of fuel
+and other chattels, meet with so few accidents. It says a great deal for
+the mild and inoffensive nature of the snake. Still, the total number of
+deaths by snake-bite reported every year is very large, and looks
+absolutely appalling if you do not think of dividing it among three
+hundred millions. Treated in that way it shrivels up at once, and when
+compared with the results of other causes of death, looks quite
+insignificant.
+
+The natives themselves are so far from regarding the serpent tribe with
+our feelings that the deadliest of them all has been canonised and is
+treated with all the respect due to a sub-deity. No Brahmin, or
+religious-minded man of any respectable caste, will have a cobra killed
+on any account. If one takes to haunting his premises, he will
+propitiate it with offerings of silk and look for good luck from its
+patronage.
+
+About snakes other than the cobra the average native concerns himself so
+little that he does not know one from another by sight. They are all
+classed together as _janwar,_ a word which answers exactly to the
+"venomous beast" of Acts xxviii. 4; and though they are aware that some
+are deadly and some are not, any particular snake that a _sahib_ has had
+the honour to kill is one of the deadliest as a matter of course. I have
+never met a native who knew that a venomous snake could be distinguished
+by its fangs, except a few doctors and educated men who have imbibed
+western science. In fact they do not think of the venom as a material
+substance situated in the mouth. It is an effluence from the entire
+animal, which may be projected at a man in various ways, by biting him,
+or spitting at him, or giving him a flick with the tail.
+
+The Government of India spends a large sum of money every year in
+rewards for the destruction of snakes. This is one of those sacrifices
+to sentiment which every prudent government offers. The sentiment to
+which respect is paid in this case is of course British, not Indian.
+Indian sentiment is propitiated by not levying any tax on dogs, so the
+pariah cur, owned and disowned, in all stages of starvation, mange and
+disease, infests every town and village, lying in wait for the bacillus
+of rabies. Against the one fatal case of snake-bite mentioned above, I
+have known of at least half a dozen deaths among Englishmen from the
+more horrible scourge of hydrophobia. In the steamer which brought me
+home there were two private soldiers on their way to M. Pasteur, at the
+expense, of course, of the British Government.
+
+
+
+
+X
+
+
+THE INDIAN SNAKE-CHARMER
+
+We must wait for another month or two before we can think of the winter
+in this country in the past tense, but in India the month of March is
+the beginning of the hot season, and the tourists who have been enjoying
+the pleasant side of Anglo-Indian life and assuring themselves that
+their exiled countrymen have not much to grumble at will now be making
+haste to flee.
+
+During the month the various hotels of Bombay will be pretty familiar
+with the grey sun-hat, fortified with _puggaree_ and pendent flap, which
+is the sign of the globe-trotter in the East. And all the tribe of birds
+of prey who look upon him as their lawful spoil will recognise the sign
+from afar and gather about him as he sits in the balcony after
+breakfast, taking his last view of the gorgeous East, and perhaps (it is
+to be feared) seeking inspiration for a few matured reflections
+wherewith to bring the forthcoming book to an impressive close. The
+vendor of Delhi jewellery will be there and the Sind-work-box-walla,
+with his small, compressed white turban and spotless robes, and the
+Cashmere shawl merchant and many more, pressing on the gentleman's
+notice for the last time their most tempting wares and preparing for the
+long bout of fence which will decide at what point between "asking
+price" and "selling price" each article shall change ownership. The
+distance between these two points is wide and variable, depending upon
+the indications of wealth about the purchaser's person and the
+indications of innocence about his countenance.
+
+And when the poor globe-trotter, who has long since spent more money
+than he ever meant to spend, and loaded himself with things which he
+could have got cheaper in London or New York, tries to shake off his
+tormentors by getting up and leaning over the balcony rails, the shrill
+voice of the snake-charmer will assail him from below, promising him, in
+a torrent of sonorous Hindustanee, variegated with pigeon English and
+illuminated with wild gesticulations, such a superfine _tamasha_ as it
+never was the fortune of the _sahib_ to witness before.
+
+_Tamasha_ is one of those Indian words, like _bundobust_, for which
+there is no equivalent in the English language, and which are at once so
+comprehensive and so expressive that, when once the use of them has been
+acquired, they become indispensable, so that they have gained a
+permanent place in the Anglo-Indian's vocabulary. It is not slang, but a
+good word of ancient origin. Hobson-Jobson quotes a curious Latin writer
+on the Empire of the Grand Mogul, who uses it with a definition
+appended, "ut spectet Thamasham, id est pugnas elephantorum, leonum,
+buffalorum et aliarura ferarum." "Show" comes nearest it in English, but
+falls far short of it.
+
+The _tamasha_ which the snake-charmer promises the _sahib_ will include
+serpent dances, a fight between a cobra and a mungoose, the inevitable
+mango tree, and other tricks of juggling. But to a stranger the
+snake-charmer himself is a better _tamasha_ than anything he can show.
+He is indeed a most extraordinary animal. His hair and beard are long
+and unkempt, his general aspect wild, his clothing a mixture of savagery
+and the wreckage of civilisation. He wears a turban, of course, and
+generally a large one; but it is put on without art, just wound about
+his head anyhow, and hanging lopsidedly over one ear. It and the loose
+cloth wrapped about the middle of him are as dirty as may be and truly
+Oriental, though erratic. But, besides these, he wears a jacket of
+coloured calico, or any other material, with one button fastened,
+probably on the wrong buttonhole, and under this, if the weather is
+cold, he may have a shirt seemingly obtained from some Indian
+representative of Moses & Co.
+
+On his shoulder he carries a long bamboo, from the ends of which hang
+villainously shabby baskets, some flat and round, occupied by snakes,
+others large and oblong, filled with apparatus of jugglery. The members
+of his family, down to an unclothed, precocious imp of ten, accompany
+him, carrying similar baskets, or capacious wallets, or long,
+cylindrical drums, on which they play with their fingers. The dramatic
+effect of the whole is enhanced when one of them allows a huge python, a
+snake of the _Boa constrictor_ tribe, which kills its prey by crushing
+it, to wind its hideous, speckled coils round his body.
+
+What the snake-charmer is by race or origin ethnologists may determine
+when they have done with the gipsy. He is not a Hindu. No particular
+part of the country acknowledges him as its native. He is to the great
+races, castes, and creeds of India what the waif is to the billows of
+the sea. His language, in public at least, is Hindustanee, but this is a
+sort of _lingua franca_, the common property of all the inhabitants of
+the country. His religion is probably one of the many forms of demon
+worship which grow rank on the fringes of Hinduism. He must be classed,
+no doubt, with the other wandering tribes which roam the country,
+camping under umbrellas, or something little better, each consecrated to
+some particular form of common crime, and each professing some not in
+itself dishonest occupation, like the tinkering of gipsies.
+
+But the snake-charmer is the best known and most widely spread of them
+all. By occupation he is a professor of three occult sciences. First, he
+is a juggler, and in this art he has some skill. His masterpiece is the
+famous mango trick, which consists in making a miniature mango tree
+grow up in a few minutes, and even blossom and bear fruit, out of some
+bare spot which he has covered with his mysterious basket. It has been
+written about by travellers in extravagant terms of astonishment and
+admiration, but, as generally performed, is an extremely clumsy-looking
+trick, though it is undoubtedly difficult to guess how it is done. A
+more blood-curdling feat is to put the unclothed and precocious imp
+aforementioned under a large basket, and then run a sword savagely
+through and through every corner of it, and draw it out covered with
+gore. When the sickened spectators are about to lynch the murderer, the
+imp runs in smiling from the garden gate.
+
+The connection between these performances and the man's second trade,
+namely, snake-charming, is not obvious to a Western mind; but it must be
+remembered that the snake-charmer is not a mere, vulgar juggler, amusing
+people with sleight-of-hand. His feats are miracles, performed with the
+assistance of superior powers. In short, he is a theosophist, only his
+converse is not with excorporated Mahatmas from Thibet, but with spirits
+of another grade, whose Superior has been known from very remote
+antiquity as an Old Serpent. In deference to this respectable connection
+the cobra holds a distinguished place even in orthodox Hinduism. So it
+is altogether fit that a performer of wonders should be on intimate
+terms with the serpent tribe. The snake-charmer keeps all sorts of
+them, but chiefly cobras. These he professes to charm from their holes
+by playing upon an instrument which may have some hereditary connection
+with the bagpipe, for it has an air-reservoir consisting of a large
+gourd, and it makes a most abominable noise. As soon as the cobra shows
+itself the charmer catches it by the tail with one hand, and, running
+the other swiftly along its body, grips it firmly just behind the jaws,
+so that it cannot turn and bite. Practice and coolness make this an easy
+feat. Then the poison fangs are pulled out with a pair of forceps and
+the cobra is quite harmless. It is kept in a round, flat basket, out of
+which, when the charmer removes the lid and begins to play, it raises
+its graceful head, and, expanding its hood, sways gently in response to
+the music.
+
+Scientific men aver that a snake has no ears and cannot possibly hear
+the strains of the pipe, but that sort of science simply spoils a
+picturesque subject like the snake-charmer. So much is certain, that all
+snakes cannot be played upon in this way: there are some species which
+are utterly callous to the influences to which the cobra yields itself
+so readily. No missionary will find any difficulty in getting a
+snake-charmer to appreciate that Scripture text about the deaf adder
+which will not listen to the voice of the charmer, charm he never so
+wisely.
+
+To these two occupations the snake-charmer adds that of a medicine man,
+for who should know the occult potencies of herbs and trees so well as
+he? So, as he wanders from village to village, he is welcomed as well as
+feared. But one wealthy tourist is worth more to him than a whole
+village of ryots, so he keeps his eye on every town in which he is
+likely to fall in with the travelling white man. And the travelling
+white man would be sorry to miss him, for he is one of the few relics of
+an ancient state of things which railways and telegraphs and the
+Educational Department have left unchanged.
+
+The itinerant jeweller and the Sind-work-box-walla are unmistakably
+being left behind as the East hurries after the West, and we shall soon
+know them no more. Showy shops, where the inexperienced traveller may
+see all the products of Sind and Benares, and Cutch and Cashmere, spread
+before him at fixed prices, are multiplying rapidly and taking the bread
+from the mouth of the poor hawker. But the snake-charmer seems safe from
+that kind of competition. It is difficult to forecast a time when a
+broad signboard in Rampart Row will invite the passer-by to visit Mr.
+Nagshett's world-renowned Serpent Tamasha, Mungoose and Cobra Fight,
+Mango-tree Illusion, etc. Entrance, one rupee.
+
+
+
+
+XI
+
+
+CURES FOR SNAKE-BITE
+
+In a little book on the snakes of India, published many years ago by Dr.
+Nicholson of the Madras Medical Service, the conviction was expressed
+that the snake-charmers of Burmah knew of some antidote to the poison of
+the cobra which gave them confidence in handling it. He said that
+nothing would induce them to divulge it, but that he suspected it
+consisted in gradual inoculation with the venom itself. Putting the
+question to himself why he did not attempt to attest this by experiment,
+he replied that there were two reasons, which, if I recollect rightly,
+were, first, that he had a strong natural repugnance to anything like
+cruelty to animals, and, secondly, that he had observed that as soon as
+a man got the notion into his head that he had discovered a cure for
+snake-bite, he began to show symptoms of insanity.
+
+It is rather remarkable that, after so many years, another Scottish
+doctor, not in Madras, but in Edinburgh, has proved, by just such
+experiments as Dr. Nicholson shrank from, that an "aged and previously
+sedate horse" may, by gradual inoculation with cobra poison, be
+rendered so thoroughly proof against it that a dose which would suffice
+to kill ten ordinary horses only imparts "increased vigour and
+liveliness" to it. Further, Dr. Fraser has found that the serum of the
+blood of an animal thus rendered proof against poison is itself an
+antidote capable of combating that poison after it has been at work for
+thirty minutes in the veins of a rabbit, and arresting its effects. And
+all this has been achieved without apparent detriment to the
+distinguished doctor's sanity.
+
+This must be intensely interesting intelligence to Englishmen throughout
+India, and joyful intelligence too, for, scoff as we may at the danger
+of being bitten by a poisonous snake, nobody likes to think that, if
+such a thing _should_ happen to him (and very narrow escapes sometimes
+remind us that it may), there would be nothing for him to do but to lie
+down and die. And so, ever since the Honourable East India Company was
+chartered, the antidote to snake poison has been a sort of philosopher's
+stone, sought after by doctors and men of science along many lines of
+investigation. And every now and then somebody has risen up and
+announced that he has found it, and has had disciples for a season.
+
+But one remedy after another, though it might give startling results in
+the laboratory, has proved to be useless in common life, and the
+majority of Englishmen have long since resigned themselves to the
+conclusion that there is no practical cure for the bite of a poisonous
+snake. For what avails it to carry about in your travelling bag a phial
+of strong ammonia and to live in more jeopardy of death by asphyxiation
+than you ever were by snakes, unless you have some guarantee that, when
+it is your fate to be bitten by a snake, the phial will be at hand? For
+ammonia must act on the venom before the venom has had time to act upon
+you, or it will only add another pain to your end; and that gives only a
+few minutes to go upon. So with nitric acid and every agent that
+operates by neutralising the poison and not by counteracting its
+effects. And this has been the character of all the remedies hitherto
+put forward. "They are," says Sir Joseph Fayrer, "absolutely without any
+specific effect on the condition produced by the poison."
+
+But "anti-venene," as Dr. Fraser calls his immunised blood-serum,
+follows the poison into the system, even after the fatal symptoms have
+begun to show themselves, and arrests them at once. So the Anglo-Indian
+may throw away his ammonia phial and, arming himself with another of
+anti-venene and a hypodermic syringe, feel that he is safe against an
+accident which will never happen. As for the man who is not nervous, he
+will speak of the new antidote, and think of it as most interesting and
+valuable, and go on his way as before with no expectation of ever being
+bitten by a venomous snake. The medical man of every degree will order
+a supply as soon as it is to be had, and conscientiously try to stamp
+out the smouldering hope within him that somebody in the station will
+soon be bitten by a cobra and give him a chance.
+
+Among the dusky millions of India Dr. Fraser's discovery will create no
+"catholic ravishment" because they will not hear of it. And if they did
+hear of it they would regard his labours as misapplied and the result as
+superfluous. For the Hindu has never shared the Englishman's opinion
+that there is no cure for snake-bite. On the contrary, he is assured
+that there are not one or two but many specifics for the bite of every
+kind of snake, known to those whose business it is to know them. If they
+are not invariably efficacious, it is for the simple reason that if a
+man's time has come to die he will die. But if his time has not come to
+die they will not fail to cure him, and since no man can know when he is
+bitten whether his time has come or not, he will lay the odds against
+Fate by trying, not one or another of them, but as many as he can hear
+of or get. Some of them are drastic in their effects, and so it too
+often proves that the poor man's time has indeed come, for though he
+might survive the snake he succumbs to the cure.
+
+It is many years now since the news was brought to me one day that a man
+whom I knew very well had been bitten by a deadly serpent and was dying.
+He was a fine, strongly built young fellow, a Mohammedan, in the employ
+of a Parsee liquor distiller, in whose godown he was arranging firewood
+when he was bitten in the foot. Without looking at the snake he rushed
+out and, falling on his face on the ground, implored the bystanders to
+take care of his wife and children as he was a dead man. The news spread
+and all the village ran together. The man was taken to an open room in
+his employer's premises and vigorous measures for his recovery were set
+on foot, in which his employer's family and servants, his own friends
+and as many of the general public as chose to look in, were allowed to
+take part.
+
+First of all, some jungle men were called in, for the man of the jungle
+must naturally know more about snakes than other men. These were
+probably Katkurrees, an aboriginal race, who live by woodcutting,
+hunting and other sylvan occupations. They proved to be practical men
+and at once sucked the wound. An intelligent Havildar of the Customs
+Department, who chanced to be present, then lanced the wound slightly to
+let the blood flow, and tied the leg tightly in two places above it.
+This was admirable. If what the jungle men and the Havildar did were
+always and promptly done whenever a man is bitten by a snake, few such
+accidents would end fatally.
+
+But this poor man's friends did not stop there. A supply of chickens had
+been procured with all haste, and these were scientifically applied.
+This is a remedy in which the natives have great faith, and I have known
+Europeans who were convinced of its efficacy. The manner of its
+application scarcely admits of description in these pages, but the
+effect is that the chickens absorb the poison and die, while the man
+lives. The number of chickens required is a gauge of the virulence of
+the serpent, for as soon as the venom is all extracted they cease to
+die. Nobody, however, could tell me how many chickens perished in this
+case. They were all too busy to stop and note the result of one remedy
+while another remained untried. And there were many yet.
+
+Somebody suggested that the venom should be dislodged from the patient's
+stomach, so an emetic was administered in the form of a handful of
+common salt, with immediate and seismic effect. Then a decoction of
+_neem_ leaves was poured down the man's throat. The _neem_ tree is an
+enemy of all fevers and a friend of man generally, so much so that it is
+healthful to sleep under its shade. Therefore a decoction of the leaves
+could not fail to be beneficial in one way or another. The residue of
+the leaves was well rubbed into the crown of the man's head for more
+direct effect on the brains in case they might be affected. Something
+else was rubbed in under the root of the tongue.
+
+In the meantime a man with some experience in exorcism had brought twigs
+of a tree of well-ascertained potency in expelling the devil, and
+advised that, in view of the known connection between serpents and
+Satan, it would be well to try beating the patient with these. The
+advice was taken, and many stripes were laid upon him. Massage was also
+tried, and other homely expedients, such as bandaging and thumping with
+the fists, were not neglected.
+
+It was about noon when I was told of the accident, and I went down at
+once and found the poor man in a woeful state, as well he might be after
+such rough handling as he had suffered for four consecutive hours; but
+he was quite conscious and there was neither pain nor swelling in the
+bitten foot. I remonstrated most vigorously, pointing out that the
+snake, which nobody had seen, might not have been a venomous one at all,
+that there were no symptoms of poisoning, except such as might also be
+explained by the treatment the man had suffered at the hands of his
+friends, and that, in short, I could see no reason to think he was going
+to die unless they were determined to kill him.
+
+My words appeared to produce a good effect on the Parsees at least, and
+they consented to stop curing the man and let him rest, giving him such
+stimulating refreshment as he would take, for he was a pious Mussulman
+and would not touch wine or spirits. I said what I could to cheer him
+up, and went away hoping that I had saved a human life. Alas! In an hour
+or so a friend came in with a root of rare virtue and persuaded the man
+to swallow some preparation of it. _Post hoc_, whether _propter hoc_ I
+dare not say, he became unconscious and sank. Before night he was
+buried.
+
+All this did not happen in some obscure village in a remote jungle. It
+happened within a mile and a half of a town controlled by a municipal
+corporation which enjoys the rights and privileges of "local
+self-government." In that town there was a dispensary, with a very
+capable assistant-surgeon in charge, and in that dispensary I doubt not
+you would have found a bottle of strong _liquor ammoniae_ and a printed
+copy of the directions issued by a paternal Government for the recovery
+of persons bitten by venomous serpents. But when the man was bitten the
+one thing which occurred to nobody was to take him there, and when I
+heard of the matter the assistant-surgeon had just left for a distant
+place, passing on his way the gate of the house in which the man lay.
+This was a bad case, but there is little reason to hope that it was
+altogether exceptional. I am afraid there can be no question at all that
+hundreds of the deaths put down to snake-bite by village punchayets
+every year might with more truth be registered as "cured to death."
+
+
+
+
+XII
+
+
+THE COBRA BUNGALOW
+
+A STORY OF A MONEYLENDER
+
+Beharil Surajmul was the greatest moneylender in Dowlutpoor. He was a
+man of rare talents. He remembered the face of every man who had at any
+time come to borrow money of him since he began to work, as a little
+boy, in his father's office, so that it was impossible to deceive him.
+He had also such a miraculous skill in the making out of accounts that a
+poor man who had come to him in extremity for a loan of fifty rupees, to
+meet the expenses of his daughter's marriage, might go on making
+payments for the remainder of his life without reducing the debt by one
+rupee. In fact, it seemed to increase with each payment.
+
+And if the matter went into court, Beharilal never failed to show that
+there was still a balance due to him much larger than the original loan.
+But so courteous and pleasant was the Seth in his manner to all that
+such matters never went into court until the right time, of which he was
+an infallible judge, for he knew the private affairs of every family in
+Dowlutpoor. Then a decree was obtained and the debtor's house, or land,
+was sold to defray the debt, Beharilal himself being usually the
+purchaser, though not, of course, in his own name, for he was a prudent
+man.
+
+By these means Beharilal had become possessed of large estates, which he
+managed with such skill that they yielded to him revenues which they had
+never yielded to the former owners of them, while his tenants, who were
+mostly former owners, grew daily more deeply involved in their pecuniary
+obligations to him, and therefore entertained no thought of leaving him,
+for he could put them into prison any day if he chose. Their contentment
+gave him great satisfaction, and he treated them with benevolence,
+giving them advances of money for all their necessary expenses and
+appropriating the whole of their crops at the harvest to repay himself.
+He bound them to buy all that they had need of at his shop, so that he
+made profit off them on both sides.
+
+And as his wealth increased, his person increased with it and his
+appearance became more imposing, so that he was regarded everywhere with
+the highest respect and esteem. He was, moreover, a very religious man
+and charitable beyond most. By early risers he might be seen in his
+garden seeking out the nests of ants and giving them, with his own
+hands, their daily dole of rice. It was his benevolent thoughtfulness
+which had supplied drinking troughs for the flocks of pigeons that
+continually plundered the stores of the other grain merchants. He had
+also established a pinjrapole for aged, sickly and ownerless animals of
+all kinds. To this he required all his tenants to send their bullocks
+when they became unfit for work, and he sold them new cattle, good and
+strong, at prices fixed by himself. If any of his old debtors, when
+reduced to beggary, came to his door for alms, they were never sent away
+without a handful of rice or a copper coin. He kept a bag of the
+smallest copper coins always at hand for such purposes.
+
+Beharilal had a fine house, designed by himself and surrounded by a vast
+garden stocked with mangoes, guavas, custard apples, oranges and other
+fruit trees, and made beautiful and fragrant with all manner of flowers.
+The cool shade drew together birds of many kinds from the dry plains of
+the surrounding country, and it pleased Beharilal to think that they
+also were recipients of his bounty and that the benefits which he
+conferred on them would certainly be entered to the credit of his
+account with Heaven.
+
+Some he fed, such as the crows, which flocked about the back door, like
+a convocation of Christian padres, in the morning and afternoon, when
+the ladies of his family gave out their portion of boiled rice and ghee.
+The pigeons also came together in hundreds in an open space under the
+shade of a noble peepul tree, where grain was thrown out for them at
+three o'clock every day; and among them were many chattering sparrows
+and not a few green parrots, which walked quaintly among the bustling
+pigeons, their long tails moving from side to side like the pointer of
+the scale on which the Bunia weighed his rupees. This resemblance struck
+him as he reclined against the fat red cushion in his verandah summing
+up his gains. There were other birds which would not eat his food, but
+found abundance, suited to their respective castes, among the shrubs and
+trees that he had planted. Mynas walked eagerly on the lawns looking for
+grasshoppers, glittering sunbirds hovered over the flowers, thrusting
+their slender bills into each nectar-laden blossom, bulbuls twittered
+among the mulberries and the koel made the shady banian tree resound
+with its melodious notes.
+
+In a remote corner of the garden, under the dark shade of a tamarind,
+there stood a small shrine, like a whitewashed tomb, with a niche or
+recess on one side of it containing a conical stone smeared with red
+ochre. Some called it Mahadeo and some Khandoba, but no one could
+explain the presence of a Mahratta god in a Bunia's garden in
+Dowlutpoor, except by quoting an old tradition about one Narayen who had
+come from the Mahratta country and lived for many years in this place.
+Some said he was a prosperous goldsmith of great piety, but others
+maintained that he was a Sunyasee, or saint, and there was no certainty
+in the matter. The one point on which all were agreed was the great
+sanctity of the shrine, and Beharilal was most careful to perform at it
+every ceremony which custom, or tradition, sanctioned for placating the
+god and averting any calamity that might arise from his displeasure.
+
+At the base of one of the old cracked walls of the shrine there was a
+hole which was the den of a very large, black cobra. Several times it
+had been seen in the garden, and, when pursued, had glided into this
+hole and escaped. When Beharilal first heard of it he was much troubled
+in his mind, but, having consulted a Brahmin, he gave strict injunctions
+that the reptile should not be molested, and since that time he had
+never failed to place an offering of milk near to the hole in the
+morning and in the evening.
+
+Now it happened that at this time there was in Dowlutpoor an English
+doctor who was generally known as the Jadoo-walla Saheb, because he was
+believed to practise sorcery and had some mysterious need of snakes.
+Perhaps he was only making experiments with their venom. At any rate, he
+wanted live cobras and offered a good price for them. So when Nagoo, the
+snake-charmer, heard that there was a large one in Beharilal's garden,
+he thought he might do good business by capturing it for the Jadoo-walla
+Saheb, and at the same time demanding a reward from the timorous Bunia
+for ridding him of such a dangerous neighbour. With this intent he
+repaired to the garden with all the apparatus of his art, his flat
+snake baskets, his mongoose and his crooked pipe. Having reconnoitred
+the ground, he commenced operations by sitting down on his hams and
+producing such ear-splitting strains from the crooked pipe as might have
+charmed Cerberus to leave his kennel at the gate of hell. Great was his
+surprise and mortification when he heard the voice of Beharilal raised
+in tones of unwonted passion and saw a stalwart Purdaisee advancing
+towards him armed with an iron-bound lathee, who, without ceremony, nay,
+with abusive epithets, hustled him and all his gear out of the garden.
+Nagoo was a snake-charmer and by nature a gipsy, and this treatment
+rankled in his dark bosom.
+
+Some weeks passed and the sun had scarcely risen when Beharilal sat in
+the ota in front of his house at his daily business, which began as soon
+as his teeth were cleaned and ended about eleven at night. The place was
+not tidy. Two or three mats were spread on the floor, a spare one was
+rolled up in a corner, several pairs of shoes were on the steps,
+umbrellas leaned against the wall, handles downwards, and a large chatty
+of drinking water stood beside them. The Bunia himself, bare-headed and
+bare-footed, sat cross-legged on a cushion, with a wooden stool in front
+of him, on which lay an open ledger of stout yellowish paper, bound in
+soft red leather and nearly two feet in length. In this he was carefully
+entering yesterday's transactions with a reed pen, which he dipped
+frequently in a brass inkpot filled with a sponge soaked in a muddy
+black fluid.
+
+Beside him sat his son, aged two years, playing with the red, lacquered
+cylinder in which he kept his reed pens. Beharilal had two girls also,
+but they were with the women folk in the interior of the house, where he
+was content they should stay. This was his only boy, the pride and joy
+of his heart. Engrossed as he was in recording his gains, he could not
+refrain from lifting his eyes now and again to feast them on that rotund
+little body, like a goblet set on two pillars. No clothing concealed the
+tense and shiny brown skin, but there were silver bracelets on the fat
+wrists and massive anklets where deep creases divided the fat little
+feet from the fat little legs, and a representation, in chased silver,
+of Eve's fig leaf hung from a silver chain which encircled the sphere
+that should have been his waist. His globular head was curiously shaven.
+From two deep pits between the bulging brow and the fat cheeks that
+nearly squeezed out the little nose between them, two black diamonds
+twinkled, full of wonder, as the small purse mouth prattled to itself
+softly and inarticulately of the mysteries of life.
+
+Suddenly a startled cry, passing into a prolonged wail of fear, roused
+old Beharilal, and he saw a sight that nearly caused him to swoon with
+terror. The little man, a moment ago so placid and happy, was shrinking
+back with "I don't like that thing" inscribed in lines of anguish on
+his distorted face, and not three feet from him a huge cobra, just
+emerged from the roll of matting, eyed him with a stony stare, its head
+raised and its hood expanded. Its quivering tongue flickered out from
+between its lips like distant flashes of forked lightning.
+
+For a moment Beharilal stood stupefied, then all the heroism that was in
+him spent itself at once. Seizing the heavy wooden stool in both his
+hands, he raised it high over his head and dashed it down on the
+reptile. The sharp edge of hard wood broke its back, and as it wriggled
+and lashed about, biting at everything within reach, the Bunia snatched
+up his boy and waddled into the house at a pace to which he had long
+been unaccustomed, calling out, in frantic gasps, for help. A rush of
+excited and screaming women met him in the inner court, and he dropped
+his precious burden, with pious ejaculations, into the arms of its
+mother, and stood panting and speechless. Then calling aloud to know if
+all danger was past, he ventured cautiously out again and saw that the
+Purdaisee and the Malee had ejected the wriggling cobra and were
+pounding its head into a jelly with a big stone.
+
+For some seconds he looked on in a strange stupor, and then he realised
+what he had done. He, Beharilal, the Bunia, who had always removed the
+insects so tenderly from his own person that they were not hurt, who had
+never committed the sin of killing a mosquito or a fly; he, with his own
+hands, had taken the life of the guardian cobra of the shrine!
+"Urray-ray! Bap-ray!" he cried, "for what demerit of mine has this
+ill-luck befallen me in my old age? What will happen now?"
+
+"Nay, Sethjkee," said the Malee, "be not afraid. It was in your destiny
+that this offspring of Satan should come to its end by your hand. We
+have pounded its head properly, so it will not return to you,"
+
+"But what of its mate?" said Beharilal. "I have heard that, if any man
+kills a cobra, its mate will follow him by day and by night until it has
+had its revenge. Is that not so?"
+
+The Malee answered, "Chh, Chh! There is no mate of this cobra," but his
+tone was not confident.
+
+"Go," cried Beharilal--"go quickly and call Nagoo, the snake-charmer. He
+has knowledge."
+
+"I will go," said the Malee, and set off at a run; but when he got out
+of the gate he lapsed into a leisurely walk, for why should a man lose
+his breath without cause? In time he found his way to the little
+settlement of huts constructed of poles and mats, where Nagoo sat on the
+ground smoking his "chillum," and told his errand.
+
+"Why should I come?" was Nagoo's reply; "I went to take away that cobra
+and the Bunia drove me from the garden with abuse. Why does he send for
+me now?"
+
+"He is a Bunia," said the Malee, as if that summed up the whole matter;
+but he added, after a pause, "If he sees a burning ground, he shakes
+like a peepul leaf. The cobra has died by his hand and his liver has
+become like water. Whatever you ask he will give. You should come,"
+
+Nagoo replied aloud, "I will come," and to himself, "I will give him
+physic." Then he took up his baskets and his pipe and followed the
+Malee.
+
+Beharilal proceeded to business with a directness foreign to his habit,
+looking over his shoulder at intervals lest a snake might be silently
+approaching. "Good Nagoo," he said, "a great misfortune has happened.
+The cobra of the shrine has been killed. Has it a mate?"
+
+"How can a cobra not have a mate?" answered Nagoo curtly.
+
+Then Beharilal employed the most insinuating of the many tones of his
+voice. "Listen, Nagoo. You are a man of skill. Capture that cobra and I
+will pay you well. I will give you five rupees." Then, observing no
+response in the wrinkled visage of the charmer, "I will give you ten
+rupees."
+
+Nagoo would have sold his revenge for a tithe of the wealth thus dangled
+before him, but he saw no reason to suppose that there was another cobra
+anywhere in the garden, so he answered with the calm confidence of an
+expert, "That cannot be done. The serpent will not heed any pipe now. In
+its mind there is only revenge."
+
+"Then what will it do?" said the trembling Bunia.
+
+"If its mate died by the hand of a man, it will follow that man until
+it has accomplished its purpose."
+
+"But how will it know," asked Beharilal, "by whose hand its mate died?"
+
+Nagoo replied with pious simplicity, "How can I tell by what means it
+knows? God informs it."
+
+"But," pleaded Beharilal, "is there no escape?--if a man goes away by
+the railway or by water?"
+
+Nagoo pondered for a moment and said, "If a man crossed the sea, the
+serpent would be baulked. If he goes by railway it will not leave him.
+Let him go to Madras, it will find him."
+
+With a faltering hand the Bunia put some rupees, uncounted, into the
+charmer's skinny palm, saying, "Go, make incantations. Do something.
+There is great knowledge of mysteries with you"; and he hurried back
+into the house.
+
+His arrangements were very soon made. His account books, with a bundle
+of bonds and hoondies and cash and his son, were put into a small cart
+drawn by a pair of fast trotting bullocks, into which he himself
+climbed, after looking under the cushion to see that there was no evil
+beast lurking there, and got away in haste while the sun was yet hot.
+The rest of the family followed with the household property, and in a
+few days the house was empty and only the Malee remained in charge. Many
+years have passed and the house is empty still, and the Malee, grown
+grey and frail, is still in charge. He gets no wages, but he sells the
+jasmine flowers and the mangoes and guavas, and he grows chillies and
+brinjals, and so fills the stomachs of himself and his little grandson
+and is contented. If you ask him where the Seth has gone, he replies,
+"Who knows?" His debt has gone with his creditor, "gone glimmering
+through the dream of things that were," and he has no desire to recall
+them.
+
+A civil or military officer from the station, taking a solitary walk,
+sometimes finds himself at the Cobra Bungalow, and turns in to wander
+among its old trees and unswept paths, obstructed by overgrown and
+untended shrubs, and wonders how it got its name. Then he pauses at the
+whitewashed shrine and notes that the god-stone has been freshly painted
+red and that chaplets of faded flowers lie before it. But the old Malee
+approaches with a meek salaam and a posy of jasmine and marigolds and
+warns him that there is a cobra in the shrine.
+
+
+
+
+XIII
+
+
+THE PANTHER I DID NOT SHOOT
+
+It was January 13 of a good many years ago, in those happy days that
+have "gone glimmering through the dream of things that were." The sun
+had scarcely risen, and I was sitting in the cosy cabin of my yacht
+enjoying my "chota hazree," which, being interpreted, means "lesser
+presence," and in Anglo-Indian speech signifies an "eye-opener" of tea
+and toast--the greater presence appears some hours later and we call it
+breakfast. I will not say that the view from my cabin windows was
+enchanting. The placid waters of the broad creek would have been
+pleasant to look upon if the level rays of the sun in his strength had
+not skimmed them with such a blinding glare, but the low, flat-topped
+hills that bounded them were forbidding.
+
+The people said truly that God had made this a country of stones, but
+they forgot that He had clothed the stones with trees of evergreen
+foliage and a dense undergrowth of shrubs and grass, to protect and hold
+together the thick bed of loam which the fallen leaves enriched from
+year to year. It was the axes of their fathers that felled the trees,
+to sell for fuel, and the billhooks of their mothers that hacked away
+the bushes and grubbed up their very roots to burn on the household
+cooking hole. Then the torrential rains of the south-west monsoon came
+down on the naked, defenceless, parched and cracked soil and swept it in
+muddy cascades down to the sea, leaving flats of bare rock, strewn thick
+with round stones, sore to the best-shod foot of man and cruel to the
+hoofs of a horse. About and among the huts of the unswept and malodorous
+hamlet just above the shore there were fine trees, mango, tamarind,
+babool and bor, showing what might have been elsewhere.
+
+On the rounded top of the highest hill frowned in black ruin an old
+Mahratta fort, covered on the top and sides and choked within by that
+dense mass of struggling vegetation which always takes possession of old
+forts in India. The weather-worn stones and crumbling mortar seem to
+feed the trees to gluttony. First some bird-drops the seeds of the
+banian fig into crevices of the ramparts, and its insidious roots push
+their way and grow and grow into great tortuous snakes, embracing the
+massive blocks of basalt, heaving them up and holding them up, so that
+they cannot fall. Then prickly shrubs and thorny trees follow, fighting
+for every inch of ground, but quite unable to eject the gently
+persistent custard-apple, descended doubtless from seeds which the
+garrison dropped as they ate the luscious fruit, on account of which the
+Portuguese introduced the tree from South America. I had penetrated
+into that fort and had seen something of the snakes and birds of night,
+but not the ghosts and demons which I was assured made it their
+habitation by day.
+
+On a level place a little below the fort stood two monuments, telling of
+the days when the Honourable East India Company maintained a "Resident"
+at this place. Here he lived in proud solitude, upholding the British
+flag. But his wife and the little one on whose face he had not yet
+looked were on their way from Bombay in a native "pattimar" to join him,
+and as he stood gazing over the sea at the red setting sun one 5th of
+October, he thought of the glad to-morrow and the end of his dreary
+loneliness. It fell to him to put up one of these monuments, with a
+sorrowful inscription to all that was left to him on the following
+morning, the "memory" of a beloved wife and an infant thirty-one days
+old, drowned in crossing the bar on October 6, 1853.
+
+ We have strewed our best to the weeds unrest,
+ To the shark and the sheering gull.
+ If blood be the price of admiralty,
+ Lord God, we ha' paid in full.
+
+I carried my gun and rifle with me in my yacht. They served to keep up
+my character as a sportsman, and did not often require to be cleaned. So
+the morning calm of my mind was lashed into an unwonted tempest of
+excitement when my jolly skipper, Sheikh Abdul Rehman, came in and told
+me briefly that a "bag" (which word does not rhyme with rag, but must
+be pronounced like barg without the _r_ and signifies a tiger or
+panther) had killed a cow in the village the night before last.
+
+When he added that the villagers had set a spring gun for it last
+evening and it had returned to the "kill" and been badly wounded, my
+excitement was turned into wrath. I had been at anchor here all
+yesterday. The Indian ryot everywhere turns instinctively to the _sahib_
+as his protector against all wild beasts. What did these men mean by
+keeping their own counsel and setting an infernal machine for their
+enemy? Abdul Rehman explained, and the explanation was simple and
+sufficient. My fat predecessor in the appointment that I held had no
+relish for sport and kept no guns, so the simple villagers, when they
+saw my boat with its familiar flag, looked for no help from that
+quarter. However, I might still win renown off that wounded "bag," if it
+was not a myth; but, to tell the truth, I was sceptical. The tiger and
+the panther are not nomads on rocky plains, like the antelope. I landed,
+notwithstanding, promptly and visited the scene. Sure enough, there was
+a young heifer lying on its side, with the unmistakable deep pits where
+the jaws of the panther had gripped its throat, and a gory cavity where
+it had selected a gigot for its dinner.
+
+Round the corpse the villagers had arranged a circular fence of thorns,
+with one opening, across which they had stretched a cord, attached at
+the other end to the trigger of an old shooting iron of some sort,
+charged with slugs and looking hard at the opening. The gun had gone off
+during the night, and the ground was soaked with blood. A few yards off
+there was another great swamp of blood. The beast had staggered away and
+lain down for a while, faint and sick. Then it had got up and crawled
+home, still dripping with blood, by which we tracked it for a good
+distance, but the trace grew gradually fainter and at last ceased
+altogether.
+
+"It has gone to the fort," said the men--"bags always go to the fort." I
+pointed out that, if it had meant to go to the fort, it would have gone
+towards the fort, instead of in another direction; but the argument did
+not move them. "The fort is a jungle, and where else should a 'bag' take
+refuge but in a jungle?" However, I was obstinate, and pursued the
+original direction until we arrived at the brow of the hill, where it
+sloped steeply down to the sea. The whole slope, for half a mile, was
+covered with a dense scrub of Lantana bushes. This is another plant
+introduced in some by-gone century from South America, and planted first
+in gardens for its profuse clusters of red and pink verbena-like
+blossoms (it is a near relation of the garden verbena), whence it has
+spread like the rabbit in New Zealand, and become a nuisance. "There," I
+cried, pointing at the scrub, "there, without doubt, your wounded 'bag'
+is lying."
+
+Some of the men, unbelieving still, were amusing themselves by rolling
+large stones down the slope, when suddenly there was a sound of
+scrambling, and across an opening in the scrub, in sight of us all, a
+huge hyaena scurried away "on three legs." I sent a man post-haste for
+my rifle, which I had not brought with me, never expecting to require it
+until a regular campaign could be arranged. As soon as it arrived, we
+formed in line and advanced, throwing stones in all directions.
+
+Make no offering of admiration at the shrine of our hardihood, for we
+were in no peril. Among carnivorous beasts there is not a more
+contemptible poltroon than the hyaena, even when wounded. A friend of
+mine once tied up a billy goat as a bait for a panther and sat up over
+it in a tree. In the middle of the night a hyaena nosed it from afar,
+and came sneaking up in the rear, for hyaenas love the flesh of goats
+next to that of dogs. But the goat saw it, and, turning about bravely,
+presented his horned front. This the hyaena could not find stomach to
+face. For two hours he manoeuvred to take the goat in rear, but it
+turned as he circled, and stood up to him stoutly till the dawn came,
+and my friend cut short its disreputable career with a bullet.
+
+To return to my story, we had not gone far when, on a lower level, not
+many yards from me, I was suddenly confronted by that repulsive,
+ghoulish physiognomy which can never be forgotten when once seen, the
+smoky-black snout, broad forehead and great upstanding ears. Instantly
+the beast wheeled and scrambled over a bank, receiving a hasty rear
+shot which, as I afterwards found, left it but one limb to go with, for
+the bullet passed clean through a hindleg and lodged in a foreleg. It
+went on, however, and some time passed before I descried it far off
+dragging itself painfully across an open space. A careful shot finished
+it, and it died under a thick bush, where we found it and dragged it
+out. It proved to be a large male, measuring 4 feet 7 inches, from which
+something over a foot must be deducted for its shabby tail.
+
+The natives all maintained still that their cow had been killed by a
+panther, saying that the hyaena had come on the second night, after
+their manner, to fill its base belly with the leavings. And there was
+some circumstantial evidence in favour of this view. In the first place,
+I never heard of a hyaena having the audacity to attack a cow; in the
+second, the tooth-marks on the cow showed that it had been executed
+according to the tradition of all the great cats--by seizing its throat
+and breaking its neck; and in the third, a hyaena, sitting down to such
+a meal, would certainly have begun with calf's head and crunched up
+every bone of the skull before thinking of sirloin or rumpsteak. But the
+absurdity of a panther being found in such a region outweighed all this
+and I scoffed.
+
+I was yet to learn a lesson in humility out of this adventure. Two years
+later I sailed over the bar and dropped anchor at the same spot. I was
+met with the intelligence that on the previous evening two panthers had
+been seen sitting on the brow of the hill and gazing at the beauties of
+the fading sunset, as wild beasts are so fond of doing. A night or two
+later a cow was attacked in a neighbouring field, and, staggering into
+the village, fell down and died in a narrow alley between two houses.
+The panther followed and prowled about all night, but the villagers,
+hammering at their doors with sticks, scared it from its meal.
+
+I at once had a nest put up in a small tree, and took my position in it
+at sunset. The common people in India do not waste much money on lamp
+oil, preferring to sleep during the hours appointed by Nature for the
+purpose, so it was not long before all doors were securely barred and
+quietness reigned. Then the mosquitoes awoke and came to inquire for me,
+the little bats (how I blessed them!) wheeled about my head, the
+night-jar called to his fellow, and the little owls sat on a branch
+together and talked to each other about me. Hour after hour passed, and
+it became too dark in that narrow alley to see a panther if it had come.
+So I came down and got to my boat. The panther was engaged a mile away
+dining on another cow! On further inquiry I learned that there was some
+good forest a day's journey distant, and it was quite the fashion among
+the panthers of that place to spend a weekend occasionally at a spot so
+full of all delights as this dark, jungle-smothered fort.
+
+
+
+
+XIV
+
+
+THE PURBHOO
+
+I do not believe that the Member of Parliament who moved the adjournment
+of the House to consider the culpable carelessness of the Government of
+India in allowing the Rajah of Muttighur to fall into the moat of his
+own castle when he was drunk, could have told you what a Purbhoo is, not
+though you had spelled it Prabhu, so that he could find it in his
+_Gazetteer_. Of course he saw hundreds of them during that Christmas
+which he spent in the East before he wrote his book; but then he took
+them all for Brahmins. He never noticed that the curve of their turbans
+was not the same, and the idol mark on their foreheads was quite
+different, nor even that their shoes were not forked at the toes, but
+ended in a sharp point curled upwards. And if he did not see these
+things which were on the surface, what could he know of matters that lie
+deeper?
+
+Now the first and most important thing to be known respecting the
+Purbhoo, the fundamental fact of him, is that he is not a Brahmin. If he
+were a Brahmin, one essential piece of our administrative apparatus in
+India would be wanting, and without it the whole machinery would
+assuredly go out of order. Nor is it easy to see how we could replace
+him. Not one of the other castes would serve even as a makeshift. They
+are all too far removed from the Brahmin. But the Purbhoo is near him,
+irritatingly near him, and he has proved in practice to be just the sort
+of homoeopathic remedy we require, the counter-irritant, the outward
+blister by wise application of which we can keep down the internal
+inflammation.
+
+In speaking of the Brahmin as an inflammation in the body politic I
+disown all offensive and invidious implications. I am only using a
+convenient simile. You may reverse it if you like and make the disease
+stand for the Purbhoo, in which case the Brahmin will be the blister.
+Which way fits the facts best will depend upon which caste chances at
+the time to be nearest to the vitals of Government.
+
+The case stands thus. Before the days of British rule the Brahmin was
+the priest and man of letters, the "clerke" in short. The rajahs and
+chiefs were much of the same mind as old Douglas:
+
+ Thanks to Saint Bothan son of mine,
+ Save Gawain, ne'er could pen a line,
+
+Gawain being a bishop. As a Mohammedan gentleman related to one of the
+ruling Indian princes put the matter when speaking to me a few years
+ago, "In those days none of us could write. Our pen was the sword. If
+any writing had to be done the Brahmin was called in." And no doubt he
+did excellent service, being diligent, astute, and withal pliant and
+diplomatic. If to these qualities he added ambition, he might, and often
+did, become a Cardinal Wolsey in the state. In Poona, for example, the
+Brahmin Prime Minister gradually overshadowed the Mahratta king, and the
+descendant of Shivajee was put on a back shelf as Rajah of Sattara,
+while the Peishwa ruled at the capital.
+
+Of course this carnal advancement was not gained without some sacrifice
+of his spiritual character, and the "secular" Brahmin had to bow, _quoad
+sacra_, to the penniless Bhut, or "regular" Brahmin, who, refusing to
+contaminate his sanctity by doing any kind of work, ate of the temple,
+or lived by royal bounty or private charity, and by the free breakfasts
+without which a marriage, "thread ceremony" or funeral in a gentleman's
+house could not be respectably celebrated. Idleness and sanctity are a
+powerful combination, and it is written in the _shastras_ that every day
+in which a holy man does no work for his bread, but lives by begging, is
+equal in the eyes of the gods to a day spent in fasting; so, though the
+prospect of power and wealth might tempt a few restless and wayward
+spirits, the great mass of the Brahmin caste clung to the sacred
+calling.
+
+All this time the Purbhoo was in the land, but insignificant. He had no
+sacred calling. Tradition assigned him a hybrid origin. He could not
+presume to be a warrior, because his mother was a _shoodra_, nor could
+he condescend to be a farmer, for his father was a _kshutriya_. So the
+gods had given him the pen, and he was a writer--not a secretary, but a
+humble quill-driver. But when the Portuguese and then the British came
+upon the scene, not ruling by word of mouth, like the native rajahs, but
+inditing their orders and keeping records, the Purbhoo saw an open door
+and went in.
+
+Then the Brahmin woke up, for he saw that he was in evil case. The
+spirit of the British _raj_ was falling like a blight and a pestilence
+upon the means by which he had lived, drying up the fountains of
+religious revenue and slowly but surely blighting the luxuriance of that
+pious liberality which always took the form of feeding holy men. He
+found that he must work for his bread whether he liked it or not, and
+the only implement of secular work that would not soil his priestly hand
+was the pen. And this was already taken up by the Purbhoo, who carried
+himself haughtily under the new _regime_ and showed no mind to make way
+for the holier man. Hence sprang those bitter enmities and jealousies
+which have done so much to lighten the difficulties of our position.
+
+The British Government has often been accused of acting on the maxim,
+_Divide et impera_. It is a libel. We do not divide, for there is no
+need. Division is already there. We have only to rejoice and rule. How
+well and justly we rule all the world knows, but only the initiated know
+how much we owe to the fact that the talents and energies which would
+otherwise be employed in thwarting our just intentions and
+phlebotomising the ryot are largely preoccupied with the more useful
+work of thwarting and undermining each other.
+
+What could a collector do single-handed against a host of clerks and
+subordinate magistrates and petty officials of every grade, all armed
+with the awfulness of a heaven-born sanctity, all hedged round with the
+prestige of an ancient supremacy, endowed with a mole-like genius for
+underground work which the Englishman never fathoms, and all leagued
+together to suck to the uttermost the life blood of those inferior
+castes which were created expressly for their advantage?
+
+_He_ is working in a foreign language, among customs and ways of thought
+which it takes a lifetime to understand: _they_ are using their mother
+tongue and handling matters that they have known from childhood. _He_
+cannot tell a lie and is ashamed to deceive: _they_ are trained in a
+thrifty policy which saves the truth for a last resort in case
+everything else should fail. He would be helpless in their hands as a
+sucking child. But he knows they will do for him what he cannot do for
+himself. The Purbhoo will lie in wait for the Brahmin, and the Brahmin
+will keep his lynx eye on the Purbhoo. And woe to the one who trips
+first. So the collector arranges his men with judicious skill to the
+fostering of each other's virtue, and the result is most gratifying.
+The country blesses his administration, and his subordinates are equally
+surprised and delighted at their own integrity.
+
+I speak of a wise and able administrator. There are men in the Indian
+Civil Service who are neither wise nor able, and some who are not
+administrators at all, having most unhappily mistaken their vocation.
+When such a one becomes collector of a district his _chitnis_, or chief
+secretary, sees that that tide in the affairs of men has come which,
+"taken at the flood, leads on to fortune," and his caste-fellows all
+through the service are filled with unholy joy. But he does nothing rash
+or hasty. Wilily and patiently he goes to work to make his own
+foundation sure first of all. He studies his chief under all conditions,
+discovers his little foibles and vanities and feeds them sedulously. He
+masters codes, rules and regulations, standing orders, precedents and
+past correspondence, till it is dangerous to contradict him and always
+safe to trust him. In every difficulty he is at hand, clearing away
+perplexity and refreshing the "swithering" mind with his precision and
+assurance. He becomes indispensable. The collector reposes absolute
+confidence in him and is proud to say so in his reports.
+
+Then the _chitnis_, if he is a Brahmin, addresses himself to the task of
+eliminating the Purbhoo from the service, or at least depriving him of
+place and power. It is a delicate task, but the Brahmin's touch is
+light. He never disparages a Purbhoo from that day; "damning with faint
+praise" is safer and as effectual. He practises the charity which
+covereth a multitude of faults, but he leaves a tag end of one peeping
+out to attract curiosity, and if the collector asks questions, he is
+candid and tells the truth, though with manifest reluctance. Then he
+grapples with the gradation lists, which have fallen into confusion, and
+puts them into such excellent order that the collector can see at a
+glance every man's past services and present claims to promotion. And
+from these lists it appears that clearly, whenever any vacancy has to be
+filled, a Brahmin has the first claim. And so, as the shades of night
+yield to the dawn of day, the Purbhoo by degrees fades away and
+disappears, and the star of the Brahmin rises and shines everywhere with
+still increasing splendour.
+
+But the Purbhoo possesses his soul in patience, and keeps a note of
+every slip that the Brahmin makes. For the next _chitnis_ may be a
+Purbhoo, and then the day of reckoning will come and old scores will be
+paid off. The Brahmin knows that too, and the thought of it makes him
+walk warily even in the day of his prosperity. Thus our administration
+is saved from utter corruption.
+
+
+
+
+XV
+
+
+THE COCONUT TREE
+
+Among the classic fairy-tales which passed like shooting stars across
+those dark hours of our boyhood in which we wrestled with the grim
+rudiments of Latin and Greek, and which abide in the memory after nearly
+all that they helped to brighten has passed away, there was one which
+related to a contest between Neptune and Minerva as to which should
+confer the greatest benefit on the human race. Neptune first struck his
+trident on the ground (or was it on the waves? "Eheu fugaces"--no, that
+also is gone), and there sprang forth a noble steed, pawing the ground,
+terrible in war and no less useful in peace. Then the watery god leaned
+back and smiled as if he would say, "Now, beat that." But the Goddess of
+Wisdom brought out of the earth a modest, dark tree bearing olives and,
+in classic phrase, "took the cake," Oriental mythology is more luxuriant
+and fantastic than that of the West, but I do not know if it has any
+legend parallel to this. If it has, then I am sure the palm is awarded
+to the deity who gave to the human race the tree that bears the coconut.
+
+Passing a confectioner's shop, I saw a tempting packet labelled
+"Cokernut Toffee." I bought a pennyworth and gave it to my little girl,
+and
+
+ "I laye a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge."
+
+How many boys and girls are there in this kingdom to whom the word
+coconut connotes an ingredient which goes to the making of a very
+toothsome sweetie? And how many confectioners and shop girls are there
+whose idea is no broader? Again:
+
+ "I laye a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge, a-thynkynge,
+ And merrie sang the Birde as she sat upon the spraye."
+
+And I said, "Little Bird, what do you know of the coconut?" And it made
+answer, "It is a cup full of food, rich and sweet, which kind hands hang
+out for me in winter," How narrow may be the key-hole through which we
+take our outlook on things human and divine, never doubting that we see
+the whole! In our own British Empire, only a few thousand miles away,
+sits a mild Hindu, almost unclad and wholly unlettered, to whom the tree
+that bore the fruit that flavoured the toffee that my little girl is
+enjoying seems to be one of the predominating tints of the whole
+landscape of life. It puts a roof over his head, it lightens his
+darkness, it helps to feed his body, it furnishes the wine that maketh
+glad his heart and the oil that causeth his face to shine, and time
+would fail me to tell of all the other things that it does for him. As a
+type and symbol, it is always about him, spanning the sunshine and
+shower of life with bows of hope.
+
+The coconut tree is a palm, and has nothing to do with cocoa of the
+breakfast table. That word is a perversion of "cacao," and came to us
+from Mexico: the other is the Portuguese word "coco," which means a nut.
+It is what Vasco da Gama called the thing when he first saw it, and the
+word, with our English translation added, has stuck to it. The tree is,
+I need scarcely say, a palm, one of many kinds that flourish in India.
+But none of them can be ranked with it. The rough date palm makes dense
+groves on sandy plains, but brings no fruit to perfection, pining for
+something which only Arabia can supply; the strong but unprofitable
+"brab," or fan palm, rises on rocky hills, the beautiful fish-tailed
+palm in forests solitarily, while the "areca" rears its tall, smooth
+stem and delicate head in gardens and supplies millions with a solace
+more indispensable than tobacco or tea. But the coconut loves a sandy
+soil and the salt breath of the sea and the company of its own kind. The
+others grow erect as a mast, but the gentle coconuts lean on the wind
+and mingle the waving of their sisterly arms, casting a grateful shade
+on the humble folk who live under their blessing.
+
+To the mariner sailing by India's coral strand that country presents the
+aspect of an endless beach of shell sand, quite innocent of coral, on
+which the surf breaks continually into dazzling white foam against a
+dark background of pensive palms. He might naturally suppose that they
+had grown up of themselves, like the screw-pines and aloes which
+sometimes share the beach with them; but that would be a great mistake.
+Everyone of them has been planted and carefully watered for years and
+manured annually with fresh foliage of forest trees buried in a moat
+round the root. And so it grew in stature, but not in girth, until its
+head was sixty, seventy or even eighty feet above the ground, and a
+hundred nuts of various sizes hung in bunches from long, shiny, green
+arms, each as thick as a man's, which had thrust themselves out from
+between the lower fronds.
+
+There is no production of Nature that I know of less negotiable than a
+coconut as the tree presents it. The man who first showed the way into
+it deserved a place in mythology with Prometheus, Jason and other heroes
+of the dawn. There is a crab, I know, which lives on coconuts, enjoying
+the scientific name of _Birgus latro_, the Burglar; but it seems to be a
+special invention, as big as a cat and armed with two fearful pairs of
+pincers in front for rending the outside casings of the fruits, and a
+more delicate tool on its hind-legs for picking out the meat. Other
+animals have to do without it, as had man, I opine, in the stone and
+copper ages. With the iron age came a chopper, called in Western India a
+"koita," with which he can hack his way through most of the obstructions
+of life. When, with this, he has slashed off the tough outer rind and
+the inch-thick packing of agglutinated fibres, like metal wires, he has
+only to crack the hard shell which contains the kernel.
+
+How little we can conceive the spaces in his life that would be empty
+without that firm pulp, at once nutritious, sweet and fragrant! Curry
+cannot be made without it, the cook cannot advance three steps in its
+absence, pattimars laden with it are sailing north, south, east and
+west, a thousand creaky wooden mills are squeezing the limpid oil out of
+it, a hundred thousand little earthen lamps filled with that oil are
+making visible the smoky darkness of hut and temple, brightening the
+wedding feast and illuminating the sad page over which the candidate for
+university honours nods his shaven head. That oil fed lighthouses of the
+first order and illuminated viceregal balls and durbars before paraffin
+and kerosene inundated the earth. And it has other uses. For arresting
+premature baldness and preventing the hair turning grey its virtues are
+equalled by no other oil known to us, and there is a fortune awaiting
+the hairdresser who can find means effectually to remove or suppress its
+peculiar and penetrating odour. Joao Gomez, my faithful "boy," did not
+object to the odour, and when he had been tempted to pass my comb
+through his raven locks as he was dusting my dressing table, I always
+knew it.
+
+When the white kernel has been turned to account, the utilities of the
+coconut are not exhausted. The shell, neatly bisected, makes a pair of
+teacups, and either of these, fitted with a wooden handle, makes a handy
+spoon. Laurenco de Gama demands one or two of these inexpensive spoons
+to complete the furnishing of my kitchen. As for the obstinate casing
+that wraps the coconut shell, it is an article of commerce. It must
+first be soaked for some months in a pit on the slimy bank of the
+backwater, until all the stuff that holds it together in a stiff and
+obdurate mass has rotted away and set free those hard and smooth fibres
+which nothing can rot. These, when thoroughly purged of the foul black
+pollution in which they have sweltered so long, will go out to all
+quarters of the world under the name of "coir" to make indestructible
+door mats and other indispensable things. It will penetrate to every
+corner of India in which a white man lives, to mat his verandahs and
+stuff his mattresses.
+
+And who shall recount a tithe of its other uses? Of course, the nude man
+under the coconut tree knows nothing of all this. He does without a
+mattress, and has no use for a door mat. But he cannot do without
+cordage, and if you took from him his coconut fibre, life would almost
+stop. Wherewith would he bind the rafters of his hut to the beams, or
+tether the cow, or let down the bucket into the well? What would all the
+boats do that traverse the backwater, or lie at anchor in the bay, or
+line the sandy beach? From the cable of the great pattimar, now getting
+under weigh for the Persian Gulf with a cargo of coconuts, to the
+painter of the dugout, "hodee," every yard of cordage about them is made
+of imperishable coir.
+
+When the axe is at last laid to the old coconut tree, a beam will fall
+to the earth sixty feet in length, hard as teak and already rounded and
+smoothed. True, you cannot saw it into planks, but no one will complain
+of that in a village which does not own a saw. It cleaves readily enough
+and straightly, forming long troughs most useful for leading water from
+the well to the plantation and for many other purposes. It can also be
+chopped into lengths suitable for the ridge poles of the hut, or for
+bridges to span the deep ditches which drain the rice fields or feed the
+salt pans. When out in quest of snipe I have sometimes had to choose
+between crossing by one of those bridges, innocent of even a handrail,
+and wading through the black slough of despond which it spanned.
+Choosing neither, I went home, but the "Kolee" and the "Agree" trip over
+them like birds, balancing household chattels on their steady heads.
+
+We must not think, however, of the trunk as, at the best, anything more
+than a by-product of the coconut tree, whose head is more than its body.
+Even while it lives its head is shorn once a year, for, as fresh fronds
+push out and upward from the centre, those of the outer circle get old
+and must be cut away. And when one of those feathery, fern-like fronds,
+toying with the breeze, comes crashing to the ground, it is ten or
+twelve feet long, and consists of a great backbone, as thick at the base
+as a man's leg, with a close-set row of swords on either side, about a
+yard in length. They are hard and tough, but supple yet and of a shiny
+green colour; but they will turn to brown as they wither.
+
+Now observe that this gigantic, unmanageable-looking leaf, like
+everything else about the coconut tree, is almost a ready-made article,
+demanding no machinery to turn it to account, except the "koita" which
+hangs ever ready from the nude man's girdle. With it he will cleave the
+backbone lengthwise, and then, taking each half separately, he will
+simply twist backwards every second sword and plait them all into a mat
+two feet wide, eight or ten feet long, and firmly bounded and held
+together on one side by the unbreakable backbone. This is a "jaolee,"
+lighter than slates, or tiles, and more handy than any form of thatch.
+You have just to arrange your "jaolees" neatly on your bamboo frame,
+each overlapping the one below it, then tie them securely in their
+places with coir rope and your roof is made for a year.
+
+There is yet another benevolence of the coconut tree which I have left
+to the last, and the simple folk of whom I am trying to write with
+fellow feeling would certainly have named it first. I ought to refer to
+it as a curse: they, without qualm or question, call it a blessing. Let
+me try to describe it dispassionately. If you wander in any palm grove
+in Western India, looking upward, it will soon strike you that a large
+number of the trees do not seem to bear coconuts at all, but black
+earthen pots. If your visit should chance to be made early in the
+morning, or late in the afternoon, the mystery will soon be revealed.
+You will see a dusky, sinewy figure, not of a monkey, but of a man,
+ascending and descending those trees with marvellous celerity and ease,
+grasping the trunks with his hands and fitting his naked feet into
+slight notches cut in them. The distance between the notches is so great
+that his knee goes up to his chin at each step, but he is as supple as
+he is sinewy and feels no inconvenience. For he is a Bhundaree, or
+Toddy-drawer, and his forefathers have been Bhundarees since the time, I
+suppose, when Manu made his immortal laws.
+
+His waistcloth is tightly girded about him, in his hand he carries a
+broad billhook as bright and keen as a razor, and from his caudal region
+depends a tail more strange than any borne by beast or reptile. It looks
+like a large brown pot, constructed in the middle. It is, in fact, a
+large gourd, or calabash, hanging by a hook from the climber's
+waistband. When he has reached the top of a tree, he gets among the
+branches and, sitting astride of one of them, proceeds to detach one of
+the black pots from the stout fruit stem on which it is fastened, and
+empty its contents into his tail. Then, taking his billhook, he
+carefully pares the raw end of the stem, refastens the black pot in its
+place and hurries down to make the ascent of another tree, and so on
+until his tail is full of a foaming white liquor spotted with drowned
+honey bees and filling the surrounding air with a rank odour of
+fermentation. This liquor is "toddy."
+
+If I were a Darwin I would not leave that word until I had traced the
+agencies which wafted it over sea and land from the shores of Hindustan
+to the Scottish coast, where it first took root and, quickly adapting
+itself to a strange environment, developed into a new and vigorous
+species, spread like the thistle and became a national institution. At
+first it was only the Briton's way of mouthing a common native word,
+"tadi" (pronounced ta-dee), which meant palm juice; but it became
+current in its present shape as early as 1673, when the traveller Fryer
+wrote of "the natives singing and roaring all night long, being drunk
+with toddy, the wine of the cocoe." About a century later Burns sang,
+
+ The lads and lasses, blythely bent,
+ To mind baith saul and body,
+ Sit round the table, weel content,
+ And steer about the toddy.
+
+Between these I can find no vestigia, but imagination easily fills the
+gap. I see a company of jovial Scots, met in Calcutta, or Surat, on St.
+Andrew's Day. European wines and beer are expensive, whisky not
+obtainable at all; but the skilful khansamah makes up a punch with toddy
+spirit, hot water, sugar and limes, and they are "well content." After
+many years I see the few of them who still survive foregathered again in
+the old country, and one proposes to have a good brew of toddy for auld
+lang syne. If real toddy spirit cannot be had, what of that? Whisky is
+found to take very kindly to hot water and sugar and limes, and the old
+folks at home and the neighbours and the minister himself pronounce a
+most favourable verdict on "toddy." In short, it has come to stay. But
+we must return to the liquor in the Bhundaree's gourd. It is the rich
+sap which should have gone to the forming of coconuts, which is
+intercepted by cutting off the point of the fruit stalk and tying on an
+earthen pot. If the pot is clean, the juice, when it is taken down in
+the morning, not fermented yet but just beginning to sparkle with minute
+bubbles, not too sweet and not so oily as the milk of the coconut, is
+nectar to a hot and thirsty soul. No summer drink have I drunk so
+innocently restorative after a hot and toilsome march on a broiling May
+morning. But the Bhundaree will not squander it so: he takes care not to
+clean his pots, and when he takes them down in the morning the liquor is
+already foaming like London stout. Not that he means to drink it
+himself, for you must know that, by the rules of his caste, he is a
+total abstainer, being a Bhundaree, whose function is to draw toddy, not
+to drink it. This is one of those profound institutes by which the
+wisdom of the ancients fenced the whole social system of this strange
+land.
+
+But, while the Bhundaree must refuse all intoxicating drinks himself, it
+is his duty to exercise a large tolerance towards those who are not so
+hindered. He is, in fact, a partner in the business of Babajee, Licensed
+Vendor of Fresh Toddy, towards whose spacious, open-fronted shop,
+thatched with "jaolees," he now carries his gourds. There the contents
+will stand, in dirty vessels and a warm place, maturing their
+exhilarating qualities until the evening, when the Tam o' Shanters and
+Souter Johnnies of the village begin to assemble and squat in a ring in
+the open space in front. They may be Kolees, or fishermen, and Agrees,
+who make salt, and aboriginal Katkurrees from the jungle, with their
+bows and arrows, most bibulous of all, but among them all there will be
+no Bhundaree. Babajee sits apart, presiding and serving, beside a dirty
+table, on which are many bottles and dirty tumblers of patterns which
+were on our tables thirty years ago. The assembly begins solemnly,
+discussing social problems and bartering village gossip, for the Hindu
+is by nature staid. After a while, at the second bottle perhaps,
+cheerfulness will supervene, then mirth and garrulity, ending, as the
+night closes round, with wordy contention and a general brawl. But
+nothing serious will happen, for toddy, though decidedly heady, is at
+the worst a thin potation. A strong and very pure spirit is distilled
+from it, which has its devotees, but the rustic, as a rule, prefers
+quantity to quality. We are often told that the British Government
+taught the people of India to drink, but the scene that I have tried to
+describe is indigenous conviviality, much older than any European
+connection with the country.
+
+Is it any wonder that the coconut has become an emblem of fertility and
+prosperity and all good luck? When a new house is building you will see
+a high pole over the doorway, bearing coconuts at the top, with an
+umbrella spread over them. Do not ask the owner the meaning of the sign,
+for he does not know. He does not think about such matters, but he feels
+about them and he knows that that is the right thing to do. Besides, he
+might ask you why you nail a horseshoe over your door. The difference
+between us and him is that we do such things in jest, no longer
+believing in them. They are the husks of a dead faith with us. But the
+Hindu's faith is very living still. So, when he breaks a coconut at the
+launching of a pattimar, he is a gainer in hope, if nothing else; while
+we squander our champagne and gain nothing. That nut follows him even to
+the grave, or burning ground, with mystic significances which I cannot
+explain. I have been told that, when a very holy man dies, who always
+clothed himself in ashes and never profaned his hands with work, his
+disciples sometimes break a coconut over his head. If the spirit can
+escape from the body through the sutures of the skull instead of by any
+of the other orifices, it is believed to find a more direct route to
+heaven, so the purpose of this ceremony may be to facilitate its exit
+that way. In that case the breaking of the nut is perhaps only an
+accident, due to its not being so hard as the holy man's skull.
+
+
+
+
+XVI
+
+
+THE BETEL NUT
+
+One half the world does not know how the other half lives. Noticing a
+pot of areca nut toothpaste on a chemist's counter, I asked him what the
+peculiar properties of the areca nut were--in short, what was it good
+for. He replied that it was an astringent and acted beneficially on the
+gums, but he had never heard that it was used for any other purpose than
+the manufacture of an elegant dentifrice. I felt inclined to question
+him about the camel in order to see whether he would tell me that it was
+a tropical animal, chiefly noted for the fine quality of its hair, from
+which artist's brushes were made. Here was a man whose special business
+it is to know the properties and uses of all drugs and their action on
+the human system, and he had not the faintest notion that there are
+nearly 300 millions of His Majesty's subjects, and many millions more
+beyond his empire, who could scarcely think of life as a thing to be
+desired if they were obliged to go through it without the areca nut. For
+the areca nut is the betel nut.
+
+In the Canarese language and the kindred dialects of Malabar it is
+called by a name which is rendered as _adike_, or _adika_, in scientific
+books, but would stand more chance of being correctly pronounced by the
+average Englishman if it were spelled _uddiky_. The coast districts of
+Canara and Malabar being famed for their betel nuts, the trade name of
+the article was taken from the languages current there, and was tortured
+by the Portuguese into _areca_. Over the greater part of India the
+natives use the Hindustanee name _supari_, but by Englishmen it is best
+known as the betel nut, because it is always found in company with the
+betel leaf, with which, however, it has no more connection than
+strawberries have with cream. The one is the leaf of a kind of pepper
+vine, and the other is the seed, or nut, of a palm. But nature and man
+have combined to marry them to one another, and it is difficult to think
+of them separately.
+
+In life the betel vine climbs up the stem of the areca palm, and in
+death the areca nut is rolled in a shroud of the betel leaf and the two
+are munched together. Other things are often added to the morsel, such
+as a clove, a cardamom, or a pinch of tobacco, and a small quantity of
+fresh lime is indispensable.
+
+What is the precise nature of the consolation derived from the chewing
+of this mixture it is not easy to say. Outwardly it produces effects
+which are visible enough, to wit, a most copious flow of saliva, which
+is dyed deep red by the juice of the nut, so that a betel nut chewer
+seems to go about spitting blood all the day. As every Hindu is a betel
+nut chewer, those 943,903 superficial miles of country which make up our
+Indian Empire must be bespattered to a degree which it dizzies the mind
+to contemplate. This is one of the difficulties of Indian
+administration. In large towns and centres of business it is found
+necessary to fortify the public buildings in various ways. The Custom
+House in Bombay has the wall painted with dark red ochre to a height of
+three or four feet from the ground.
+
+But these are the outward results. What is the inwardness of the thing?
+In a word, why do the people chew betel nut? Surely not that they may
+spit on our public buildings. That is a chance result, not sought for
+and not shunned. There is, of course, some deeper reason. Early
+travellers in India were much exercised about this and used to question
+the people, from whom they got some curious explanations. One reports,
+"They say they do it to comfort the heart, nor could live without it."
+Another says, "It bites in the mouth, accords rheume, cooles the head,
+strengthens the teeth and is all their phisicke." A Latin writer gets
+quite eloquent. "_Ex ea mansione_"--by that chewing--he says, "mire
+recreantur, et ad labores tolerandos et ad languores discutiendos."
+
+But the remarkable thing is that the betel nut has these effects only on
+the Hindu constitution. To a European the strong, astringent taste and
+penetrating odour of the betel nut are alike insufferable, and there is
+no instance on record, as far as I know, of an Englishman becoming a
+betel nut chewer. But wherever Hindu blood circulates, not in India
+only, but all through the islands of the Malay Archipelago, as far as
+the Philippines, the betel nut is an indispensable ingredient of any
+life that is worth living. Mohammedanism forbids spirits and Brahminism
+condemns all things that intoxicate or stupefy, but the betel nut is
+like the cup that cheers yet not inebriates. No religion speaks
+disrespectfully of it. It flourishes, blessed by all, and takes its
+place among the institutions of civilisation. Indeed it is the chief
+cement of social intercourse in a country where all ordinary
+conviviality between man and man is almost strangled by the quarantine
+enforced against ceremonial defilement. Friend offers friend the betel
+nut box just as Scotsmen offered the snuff-box in the hearty old days
+that are passing away. And all visits of ceremony, durbars, receptions,
+leave-takings, and public functions of the like kind are brought to an
+august close by the distribution of _pan supari_. To go through this
+rite without visible repugnance is part of the training of our young
+Civil Servants. When the interview or ceremony has lasted as long as it
+was intended to last, there enter, with due pomp, bearers of
+heavy-scented garlands, woven of jasmine and marigold, and in form like
+the muffs and boas that ladies wear in winter. These are put upon the
+necks and wrists of the guests in order of rank. Silver vases and
+sprinklers follow, containing rose-water and attar of roses. You may
+ward off the former from your person by offering your handkerchief for
+it, and you may present the back of your hand for the latter, of which
+one drop will be applied to your skin with a tiny silver or golden
+spoon.
+
+Finally, when everybody is reeking with incongruous odours and trying
+not to be sick, a silver tray appears with the daintiest little packets
+of _pan supari_, each pinned with a clove, and every guest is expected
+to transfer one to his mouth, for they have been prepared by a Brahmin
+and cannot hurt the most delicate caste. To an Englishman, however, it
+is now generally conceded to compromise by keeping the morsel in his
+hand, as if waiting an opportunity to enjoy it more at his leisure. When
+you get home your servant craves it of you and contrasts real rajah's
+_pan supari_ with the stuff which the poor man gets in the bazaar.
+
+The chewing of betel nut requires more apparatus and makes greater
+demands on a man's time and personal care than the smoking of tobacco or
+any of the allied vices. To cut the nut neatly an instrument is used
+like an enormous pair of nutcrackers with a sharp cutting edge. The lime
+should be made from oyster shells and it must be freshly burned and
+slaked. Exposure to the air soon spoils it, so a small, air-tight tin
+box is required to keep it in. Lastly, the betel leaf must be fresh,
+and in a hot climate green leaves do not keep their freshness without
+special care.
+
+But the necessity for attending to all these matters no doubt adds
+greatly to the interest which a chewer of _pan supari_ is able to find
+in life. Moreover, his taste and wealth have scope for expression in the
+elegance of his appointments, and by these you may generally judge of a
+man's rank and means. A well-to-do Mahratta cartman will carry in his
+waistband a sort of bijou hold-all of coloured cloth, which, when
+unrolled, displays neat pockets of different forms for the leaves,
+broken nuts, lime box, spices, etc.; but a native magistrate, who goes
+about attended by a peon and need not carry his own things, will have a
+box of polished brass, or even silver, divided into compartments.
+
+One may easily infer that to meet such a universal want there must be a
+correspondingly great industry, and the cultivation of the betel nut is
+indeed a great industry, and a most beautiful one. Surely since Adam
+first began to till the ground in the sweat of his face, his children
+have found no tillage so Eden-like as this. India has produced no Virgil
+to take the common charms of a farmer's life and put them into immortal
+song, so we search her literature in vain to learn how her simple,
+rustic people feel about these things, and in what we see of their life
+there is little sign that they feel about them at all; but when the
+Englishman, wandering, gun in hand, up a steaming valley among
+forest-clad hills, suddenly finds the path lead him into a betel nut
+garden, with no wire fence, or locked gate, or inhospitable notice
+threatening prosecution to trespassers, he feels as if he had entered
+some region of bliss where the earthly senses are too narrow for the
+delights that press for entrance to the soul.
+
+In the first place, the areca nut palm is almost, if not altogether, the
+most graceful of all its graceful tribe. Unlike the coconut, it grows as
+erect as a flagstaff, and the effect of this is increased by its extreme
+slenderness, for though it may attain a height of fifty feet, its
+diameter scarcely exceeds six inches. At the top of the stem there is a
+sheath of polished green, from the top of which again there issues a
+tuft of the most ethereal, feathery fronds, diverging and drooping with
+matchless grace. Under these hang the clusters of reddish-brown nuts.
+
+As the areca nut will not grow except in places that are at once moist
+and warm, the gardens are generally situated in narrow valleys and dells
+among hills, with little streams of limpid water rippling past them or
+through them. The steaming heat of such situations can only be realised
+by one who has traversed them at noon in the month of May in pursuit of
+sport or natural history. But the palms grow so close together that
+their fronds mingle into an almost unbroken roof, through which the sun
+can scarcely peep, and every air that enters there has the heat charmed
+out of it, and as it wanders among the broad, aromatic leaves of the
+betel vines which wreathe the pillars of that fairy hall, it is
+softened with balmy moisture, and laden with fragrance and scent to woo
+your senses in perfect tune with the tinkling music of the water and the
+enchanting beauty of the whole scene.
+
+In a large hut among these shades, with bananas waving their banner
+leaves over the smooth and well-swept yard in front, where the children
+play, lives the family that cultivates the garden. They are a sect of
+Brahmins, but very unbrahminical, unsophisticated, industrious,
+temperate, kind and hospitable. Other Brahmins despise them and wish to
+deny them the name, because they have soiled their priestly hands with
+agriculture. But they return the contempt, and walk in the way of their
+fathers, a way which leads them among the purest pleasures that this
+life affords and keeps them from many of its more sordid temptations.
+Perhaps the picture has its darker shades too. I have not seen them, and
+why should I look for them?
+
+The betel nut harvest is something of the nature of an acrobatic
+performance, for the crop is not on the ground, but on poles forty or
+fifty feet high. This is the manner in which it is gathered. The farmer,
+attended by his wife, goes out, and slipping a loose loop of rope over
+his feet to keep them together, so that when he gets the trunk of a tree
+between them it may fit like a wedge, he clasps one of the trees with
+his hands and goes up at a surprising rate. He carries with him a long
+rope, and when he reaches the top, he fastens one end of it to the
+tree, and throws the other to his wife, who goes to a distance and draws
+it tight. Then the man breaks off a heavy bunch of ripe nuts, and
+hitching it on the rope lets it go. It shoots down with such velocity
+that it would knock his wife down did she not know how to dodge it
+skilfully and break its force in a bend of the rope.
+
+When all the bunches are on the ground, the man begins to sway his body
+violently till the tender and supple palm is swinging like a pendulum
+and almost striking the trees on either side. Watching his opportunity,
+the man grasps one of these and transfers himself to it with the
+nimbleness of a monkey. In this way he makes an aerial journey round the
+garden and avoids the fatigue of climbing up and down every separate
+tree.
+
+The gathered betel nuts soon find their way to the warehouses of fat
+Bunias at the coast ports, where they are peeled and prepared and sorted
+and piled in great heaps according to quality, and finally shipped in
+_pattimars_ and _cotias_ and coasting steamers, and so disseminated over
+the length and breadth of the land to be the comforters of poor and
+rich.
+
+It only remains to say that the betel nut is not used in the East for
+tooth-powder, though the natives believe that the practice of chewing it
+saves them from toothache. When they use any dentifrice it is generally
+charcoal, and their toothbrush is either the forefinger or a fibrous
+stick chewed at the end till it becomes like a stiff paintbrush. But
+whatever he may use for the purpose, the Hindu cleans his teeth every
+morning, and that most thoroughly, before he will allow food to pass his
+lips, and the whiteness and soundness of his teeth are an object of envy
+to Englishmen.
+
+
+
+
+XVII
+
+
+A HINDU FESTIVAL
+
+Poets may sing,
+
+ "Let the ape and tiger die,"
+
+but they are not quite dead yet, only caged, and where is the man in
+whose bosom there lurks no wish that he could open the door just once in
+a way and let them have a frisk? In the East there is no hypocrisy about
+the matter. The tiger's den is barred and locked, and the British
+Government keeps the key, but the ape has an appointed day in the year
+on which he shall have his outing. They call it the _Holi_, which is a
+misnomer, for of all Hindu festivals this is the most unholy; but of
+that anon.
+
+I asked a Brahmin what this festival commemorated, and he said he did
+not know. He knew how to observe it, which was the main thing. Of
+course, there is an explanation of it in Hindu mythology, which the
+Brahmin ought to have known, and very probably did know, but was ashamed
+to tell. But it matters little, for we may be well assured that the
+explanation was invented to sanctify the festival long after the
+festival itself came into vogue, as has been the case with some of our
+most Christian holidays.
+
+The Holi comes round about the time of the vernal equinox, when victory
+declares for day and warmth in its long struggle with night and cold.
+Then Nature rises and shakes herself as Samson rose and shook himself
+and snapped the seven new cords that bound him, as tow is snapped when
+it smells the fire. Then "the wanton lapwing gets himself another
+crest," and then also the young Hindu's fancy lightly turns to thoughts
+of love; and so it came about quite naturally that, looking around,
+among his plentiful gods, for a deity who might fitly be invited to
+preside over his lusty rejoicings at this season, he pitched upon
+Krishna.
+
+For Krishna, when he was upon this earth, was an amorous youth, and his
+goings on with certain milkmaids were such as would shock Mrs. Grundy at
+the present day even in India, supposing he had been only a man. But he
+was a god, therefore his doing a thing made it right, and, where he
+presides, his worshippers may do as he did. Consequently, man, woman and
+child of every caste and grade give themselves licence, during these
+days of the Holi, to act and speak in a manner that would be scandalous
+at any other time of the year.
+
+Hindus of the better sort are beginning to be outwardly, and some of
+them, I hope, inwardly, rather ashamed of this festival, and it is time
+they were. Yet there is always something cheering in the sight of
+untutored mirth and exuberant animal joy breaking out and triumphing
+over the sadness of life and the monotony of lowly toil; and I confess
+that I find a pleasing side to this festival of the Holi. I like it best
+as I have seen it in a fishing village on the west coast of India.
+
+At first sight you would not suspect the black and brawny Koli of much
+gaiety, but there is deep down in him a spring of mirth and humour
+which, "when wine and free companions kindle him," can break out into
+the most boisterous hilarity and jocundity and even buffoonery, throwing
+aside all trammels of convention and decorum. His women folk, too,
+though they do not go out of their proper place in the social system,
+assert themselves vigorously within it, and are gay and vivacious and
+well aware of their personal attractions. So the Koli village looks
+forward to the Holi and makes timely preparation for it.
+
+The night before the _poornima_, or full moon, of the month Phalgoon
+arrives, each trim fishing boat is stored with flowers and leafy
+branches, all the flags that can be mustered and a drum; then the whole
+village goes a-fishing. Next morning each housewife gets up early to
+decorate her house and trick out herself and her children. For though
+the Koli is the most naked of men, his whole workaday costume consisting
+of one rag about equal in amplitude to half a good pocket-handkerchief,
+his wife is the most dressy of women. She is always well-dressed even
+on common days. The bareness of her limbs may perhaps shock our notions
+of propriety at first, for, being a mud-wader of necessity, like the
+stork and the heron, she girds her garments about her very tightly
+indeed; but this only sets off her wonderfully erect and athletic
+figure, while her well-set head looks all the nicer that it has no
+covering except her own neatly-bound hair. She never draws her _saree_
+coyly over her head, like other native women, when she meets a man. On
+this day there is no change in the fashion of her costume (that never
+changes), but she puts on her brightest dress, blue, or red, or lemon
+yellow, with all her private jewellery, and decks her hair with a small
+chaplet of bright flowers.
+
+Her children are tricked out with more fancy. The little brown girl, who
+yesterday had not one square inch of cloth on the whole of her tiny
+person, comes out a _petite_ miss in a crimson bodice and a white skirt,
+with her shining black hair oiled and combed and plaited and decked with
+flowers, and her neck and arms and feet twinkling with ornaments. Her
+brother of six or seven looks as if he were going to a fancy-dress ball
+in the character of His Highness the Holkar. His small head is set in a
+great three-cornered Maratha turban, and his body, a stranger to the
+feel of clothes, is masked in a resplendent purple jacket. The young men
+of the village, such of them as are not gone a-fishing, have donned
+clean white jackets. Beyond that they will not go, contemning
+effeminacy.
+
+About nine o'clock, when the sun is now well up, the distant sound of a
+tom-tom is heard, and the first of the returning fleet of _muchwas_
+appears at the mouth of the creek. A long line of red and white flags
+extends from the top of the mainyard to the helm and streamers flutter
+from the mastheads. A monster bouquet of marigolds is mounted on the
+bowsprit, branches of trees are stuck about in all possible situations,
+and three or four large fishes hang from the bow, trailing their tails
+in the water. With the exception of the man at the helm, who sits
+stolid, minding his business, and one youth who plays the tom-tom, the
+crew are standing in a ring, gesticulating with their arms and legs, or
+waving wands and branches of trees. Some have half of their faces
+smeared with red paint. If a boat passes they greet it with a shout and
+a sally of wit or ribaldry. The other _muchwas_ follow close behind,
+with every inch of white sail spread and all a-flutter with flags and
+streamers: it would be difficult to imagine a prettier spectacle, and
+the tom-toming and the happiness beaming on the faces of the crews are
+almost infectious. One feels almost compelled to wave one's hat and cry,
+"Hip, hip, hooray!"
+
+The boats come to shore, and then there ought to be a tumbling out of
+the silvery harvest and a gathering of women and a strife indescribable
+of shrill tongues, and then a long procession of wives and daughters
+trotting to market, each balancing a great, dripping basket on her
+comely head, while the husbands and fathers go home to eat and sleep.
+But there is none of that to-day. The silvery harvest may go to
+destruction and the husbands and fathers can do without sleep for once.
+The children are taken on board in all their finery, and friends join
+and musicians with their instruments. Then all sails are spread again
+and the boats start for a circuit round the harbour. The wind blows
+fiercely from the north, and each buoyant _muchwa_ scuds along at a
+fearful pace, heeling over until the rippling water fingers the edge of
+the gunwale as if it were just getting ready to leap over and take
+possession. But the hilarious Koli balances himself on the sloping
+thwarts and jumps and sings and claps his hands, while the pipes screech
+and the drums rattle. Twice, or three times, does the whole fleet go out
+over the bar and wheel and return, each boat racing to be first, with no
+more sense of danger than a porpoise at play.
+
+At last they have had enough. The sails are furled and the boats
+beached, the big fishes are taken down from the bows, and the whole
+crowd, with their trophies and garlands, dance their way to the village.
+There it is better that we leave them. To-night great fires will be
+lighted in the middle of the main road and capacious pots of toddy will
+be at hand, and every merry Koli will get hilariously drunk and do and
+say things which we had better not see and hear. And the children will
+look on and try to imitate their elders. And women will find it best to
+keep out of the way for the sake of their pretty dresses, if there were
+no better reason. For pots of water dyed crimson with _goolal_ powder
+are ready, and everybody has licence to splash everybody when he gets a
+chance. Any time during the next two or three days you may find your own
+servants coming home dappled with red.
+
+So the ape has his fling. And the tiger is lurking not far behind. In
+each of those fires it is the proper thing to roast a cock, throwing him
+in alive. If the fire is a great one, a general village fire, then it is
+still greater fun to throw in a live goat. But the worst of these
+ceremonies are happily going out of fashion. For the English law is
+stern, and the _sahibs_ have strange and quixotic notions about cruelty
+to animals, and although they are far away on tour at this season and no
+native officer would voluntarily interfere with an immemorial custom,
+still the tiger walks in fear in these days and the Koli is often
+content to roast a coconut as proxy for a cock or a goat.
+
+
+
+
+XVIII
+
+
+INDIAN POVERTY
+
+THE STANDARD OF LIVING
+
+When Mr. Keir Hardie was in India he satisfied himself that the standard
+of living among the working classes in India has been deteriorating.
+This is interesting psychologically, and one would like to know by what
+means Mr. Keir Hardie attained to satisfaction on such a great and
+important question. Doubtless he had the ungrudging assistance of Mr.
+Chowdry.
+
+The poverty of India has for a good many years been a handy weapon, like
+the sailor's belaying pin, for everyone who wanted to "have at" our
+administration of that country; and if "a lie which is half a truth is
+ever the blackest of lies," then this one must be as black as Tartarus,
+for it is indubitably more than half a truth. The common field-labourer
+in India is about as poor as man can be. He is very nearly as poor as a
+sparrow. His hut, built by himself, is scarcely more substantial or
+permanent than the sparrow's nest, and his clothing compares very
+unfavourably with the sparrow's feathers. The residue of his worldly
+goods consists of a few cooking pots and, it must be admitted, a few
+ornaments on his wife.
+
+But a sparrow is usually well fed and quite happy. It has no property
+simply because it wants none. If it stored honey like the busy bee, or
+nuts like the thrifty squirrel, it would be a prey to constant anxiety
+and stand in hourly danger of being plundered of its possessions, and
+perhaps killed for the sake of them. Therefore to speak of a Hindu's
+poverty as if it certainly implied want and unhappiness is mere
+misrepresentation born of ignorance. In all ages there have been men so
+enamoured of the possessionless life that they have abandoned their
+worldly goods and formed brotherhoods pledged to lifelong poverty. The
+majority of religious beggars in India belong to brotherhoods of this
+kind, and are the sturdiest and best-fed men to be seen in the country,
+especially in time of famine.
+
+But the Hindu peasant is not a begging friar, and may be supposed to
+have some share of the love of money which is common to humanity; so it
+is worth while to inquire why he is normally so very poor. There are two
+reasons, both of which are so obvious and have so often been pointed out
+by those who have known him best, that there is little excuse for
+overlooking them. The first of them is thus stated in Tennant's _Indian
+Recreations_, written in 1797, before British rule had affected the
+people of India much in one direction or another. "Industry can hardly
+be ranked among their virtues. Among all classes it is necessity of
+subsistence and not choice that urges to labour; a native will not earn
+six rupees a month by working a few hours more, if he can live upon
+three; and if he has three he will not work at all," Such was the Hindu
+a century ago in the eyes of an observant and judicious man, studying
+him with all the sympathetic interest of novelty, and such he is now.
+
+The other reason for the chronic poverty of the Indian peasant is that,
+if he had money beyond his immediate necessity, he could not keep it. It
+is the despair of the Government of India and of every English official
+who endeavours to improve his condition that he cannot keep his land, or
+his cattle, or anything else on which his permanent welfare depends. The
+following extract from _The Reminiscences of an Indian Police Official_
+gives a lively picture of the effect of unaccustomed wealth, not on
+peasants, but on farmers owning land and cattle and used to something
+like comfort.
+
+"Yellapa, like all cotton growers in that part of the Western
+Presidency, profited enormously by the high price of the staple during
+the American war. Silver was poured into the country (literally) in
+_crores_ (millions sterling), and cultivators who previously had as much
+as they could do to live, suddenly found themselves possessed of sums
+their imagination had never dreamt of. What to do with their wealth, how
+to spend their cash was their problem. Having laden their women and
+children with ornaments, and decked them out in expensive _sarees_, they
+launched into the wildest extravagance in the matter of carts and
+trotting bullocks, going even as far as silver-plated yokes and harness
+studded with silver mountings. Even silver tyres to the wheels became
+the fashion. Twelve and fifteen rupees were eagerly paid for a pair of
+trotting bullocks. Trotting matches for large stakes were common; and
+the whole rural population appeared with expensive red silk umbrellas,
+which an enterprising English firm imported as likely to gratify the
+general taste for display. Many took to drink, not country liquors such
+as had satisfied them previously, but British brandy, rum, gin, and even
+champagne."
+
+A few pages further on the author tells us of the ruin by debt and
+drunkenness of the families which had indulged in these extravagances.
+The fact is that to keep for to-morrow what is in the hand to-day
+demands imagination, purpose and self-discipline, which the Hindu
+working man has not. He is the product of centuries, during which his
+rulers made the life of to-morrow too uncertain, while his climate made
+the life of to-day too easy. No outward applications will alone cure his
+poverty, because it is a symptom of an inward disease.
+
+When a healthier state of mind shall awaken an appetite for comforts and
+conveniences, and create necessities unknown to his fathers, then
+degrading poverty will no longer be possible as the common lot. And it
+was to be hoped that the British rule would in time have this happy
+effect. Tennant evidently thought that it had begun to do so even in his
+day. "The existence," he says, "of a regular British Government is but a
+recent circumstance; yet in the course of a few years complete security
+has been afforded to all of its dependants; many new manufactures have
+been established, many more have been extended to answer the demands of
+a larger exportation. We have therefore conferred upon our Asiatic
+subjects an increase of security, of industry and of produce, and of
+consequent greater means of enjoyment."
+
+It is therefore a very grave charge that Mr. Keir Hardie brings against
+the British Administration when he says, a century after these words
+were written, that the standard of living among the Hindu peasantry has
+deteriorated. Happily there does not appear to have been a close
+relation between facts and Mr. Keir Hardie's conclusions during his
+Indian tour, so we may continue to put our confidence in the many
+hopeful indications that exist of a distinct improvement in the ideal of
+life which has so long prevailed among our poor Indian fellow-subjects.
+The rise in the wages of both skilled and unskilled labour during even
+the last thirty years, especially in and near important towns, has been
+most remarkable.
+
+It is more to the point to know what the labourer is able to do and
+actually does with his wages, and here the returns of trade and the
+reports of the railway companies, post office and savings bank have
+striking evidence to offer. They are published annually, and anyone,
+even Mr. Keir Hardie, may consult them who likes his facts in
+statistical form. For those who live in India there are abundant
+evidences with more colour in them. Some thirty years ago, or more,
+there was a steamship company in Bombay owning two small steamers which
+carried passengers across the harbour. By degrees it extended its
+operations and increased its fleet until it had a daily service of fast
+steamers, with accommodation for nearly a thousand third-class
+passengers, which went down the coast as far as Goa, calling at every
+petty port on the way. The head of the firm retired some years ago,
+having made his pile. Seldom has a more profitable enterprise been
+started in Bombay. And whence did the profits come? From the pockets of
+Hindu peasants. The Mahrattas of the Ratnagiri District supply most of
+the "labour" required in Bombay, and for these the company spread its
+nets. And by their incessant coming and going it amassed its wealth.
+
+Heads of mercantile firms and Government offices, and all who have to
+deal with the Mahratta "puttiwala," viewed its success without surprise.
+Though always grumbling at his wages, he never appears to be without the
+means and the will to travel. A marriage, a religious ceremony in his
+family, or the death of some relative, requires his immediate presence
+in his village, and he asks for leave. If he cannot get it otherwise, he
+offers to forfeit his pay for the period. If it is still refused, he
+resigns his situation and goes. This does not indicate pinching poverty;
+there must be some margin between such men and starvation. And a saunter
+through their villages will amply confirm such a surmise.
+
+It is no uncommon thing in these coast villages to see that foreign
+luxury, a chair, perhaps even an easy-chair, in the verandah of a common
+Bhundaree (toddy-drawer). The rapidly growing use of chairs, glass
+tumblers, enamelled ironware, soda-water and lemonade, patent medicines,
+and even cheap watches, declares plainly that the young Hindu of the
+present day does not live as his fathers did. Men go better dressed, and
+their children are clothed at an earlier age. The advertisements in
+vernacular languages that one meets with, circulated and posted up in
+all sorts of places, tell the same tale convincingly; for the advertiser
+knows his business, and will not angle where no fish rise.
+
+Nor are large towns like Bombay the only places where the Hindu peasant
+widens his horizon and acquires new tastes. In the Fiji Islands there
+are about 22,000 natives of India who went out as indentured coolies
+with the option of returning at the end of five years at their own
+expense, or after ten years at that of Government. When these men come
+home, they bring with them new tastes and new ideas, as well as the
+habit of saving money and thousands of rupees saved during their short
+exile. In Mauritius and South Africa the Hindu working man is learning
+the same lessons. When he gets back to the sleepy life of his native
+village, he is not likely to settle down contentedly at the level from
+which he started.
+
+On every hand, in short, forces are at work stirring discontent in the
+breasts of the younger generation with the existence which was the
+heritage of their fathers. These forces operate from the outside, and
+the mass is large and very inert: it would be rash to say that in the
+heart of it there are not still millions who regard a monotonous
+struggle for a bare existence as their portion from Providence. But when
+a man who has travelled in India for half a cold season tells us that
+the standard of living in India has deteriorated, we are tempted to
+quote from Sir Ali Baba: "What is it that these travelling people put on
+paper? Let me put it in the form of a conundrum. Q. What is it that the
+travelling M.P. treasures up and the Anglo-Indian hastens to throw away?
+A. Erroneous hazy, distorted impressions." "One of the most serious
+duties attending a residence in India is the correcting of those
+misapprehensions which your travelling M.P. sacrifices his bath to
+hustle upon paper."
+
+
+
+
+XIX
+
+
+BORROWED INDIAN WORDS
+
+Of the results of the Roman supremacy in Britain none have been so
+permanent as their influence on our language. No doubt this was less due
+to any direct effect that their residence among the Britons had at the
+time on vernacular speech than to the fact that, for many centuries
+after their departure, Latin was the language, throughout Europe, of
+literature and scholarship. Our supremacy in India is acting on the
+languages of that country in both ways, and though it has scarcely
+lasted half as long yet as the Roman rule in Britain, English already
+bids fair to become one day the common tongue of the Hindus. But there
+is also a current flowing the other way, comparatively insignificant,
+but curious and interesting.
+
+Few persons in England are aware how often they use words of Indian
+origin in common speech. In attempting to give a list of these I will
+exclude the trade names of articles of Indian produce or manufacture,
+which have no literary interest, and also words which indicate objects,
+ideas or customs that are not English, and therefore have no English
+equivalents, such as "tom-tom," "sepoy" and "suttee," I will also omit
+Indian words, such as "bundobust," and "griffin," which are used by
+writers like Thackeray in the same way in which French terms are
+commonly introduced into English composition.
+
+Of course, it is not always possible to draw a hard and fast line. There
+are words which first came into England as the trade names of Indian
+products, but have extended their significance, or entirely changed it,
+and taken a permanent place in the English language. Pepper still means
+what it originally meant, but it has also become a verb. Another example
+is Shawl, a word which has lost all trace of its Oriental origin. It is
+a pure Hindustani word, pronounced "Shal," and indicating an article
+thus described in the seventeenth century by Thevenot, as quoted in
+Hobson-Jobson:--"Une Chal, qui est une maniere de toilette d'une laine
+tres fine qui se fait a Cachmir." With the article to England came the
+name, but soon spread itself over all fabrics worn in the same fashion,
+except the Scotch plaid, which held its own.
+
+Somewhat similar is Calico, originally a fine cotton cloth imported from
+Calicut. This place is called Calicot by the natives, and may have
+dropped the final T through the influence of French dressmakers. Chintz
+is another example, being the Hindustani word "cheent," which means a
+spotted cotton cloth. In trade fabrics are always described in the
+plural, and the Z in Chintz is no doubt a perversion, through
+misunderstanding, of the terminal S. Lac is another Indian word which
+has retained its own meaning, but it has gone beyond it and given rise
+to a verb "to lacquer."
+
+With these perhaps should be mentioned Pyjamas and Shampoo, both of
+which have undergone strange perversions. Pyjama is an Indian name for
+loose drawers or trousers tied with a cord round the waist, such as
+Mussulmans of both sexes wear. In India the Pyjama was long ago adopted,
+with a loose coat to match, as a more decent and comfortable costume
+than the British nightshirt, and when Anglo-Indians retired they brought
+the fashion home with them, English tailors called the whole costume a
+"Pyjama suit," but the second word was soon dropped and the first
+improved into the plural number.
+
+"Shampoo" comes from a verb "champna," to press or squeeze, and the
+imperative, "champo," as often happens, was the form in which it became
+English. Forbes, in his _Oriental Memoirs_, writes of "the effects of
+opium, champoing and other luxuries indulged in by Oriental
+sensualists." When the medical profession in England began to patronise
+the practice, it assumed a more dignified name, "massage," and the old
+word was relegated to the hairdressers, who appropriated it to the
+washing of the head, an operation with which the word has no proper
+relation at all.
+
+There are two words of doubtful derivation, which may be mentioned in
+this connection. Cot, in the sense of a light bed, or cradle, is not
+much used in England, but is given in Webster's and other dictionaries,
+with the same Saxon derivation, as the "cot beside the hill" which the
+poet Rogers sighed for. If this is correct, then it is at least curious
+that the word should have almost gone out of use in England and revived
+in India from a distinct root. There it is the term in every-day use for
+any rough bedstead, such as the natives sleep on and call a khat. The
+average Englishman cannot aspirate a K, and never pronounces the Indian
+A aright unless it is followed by an R, so khat becomes "cot" by a
+process of which there are many illustrations.
+
+The other doubtful word mentioned above is Teapoy. It is defined in the
+dictionaries as an ornamental table, with a folding top, containing
+caddies for holding tea, but in India, where it is in much more general
+use than it is in England, it signifies simply a light tripod table and
+almost certainly comes from "teenpai" (three-foot), corresponding to
+another common word, "charpai" (four-foot), which means a native
+bedstead. The fact that it is sometimes spelled Tepoy confirms this, but
+the other spelling is commoner, and appears to have led to its getting a
+special meaning connected with tea among furniture sellers.
+
+Cheroot, Bangle, Curry and Kidgeree are examples of words which have
+come to us with the things which they signify, and retain their meaning
+though the thing itself may have undergone some change. Curry as made in
+England is sometimes not recognisable by a new arrival from India, and
+Kidgeree is applied to a preparation of rice and fish, whereas it means
+properly a dish of rice, split peas and butter, or "ghee." Fish may be
+eaten with it, but is not an ingredient of it. Bazaar may be classed
+with these words, and also Polo, which is merely the name for a polo
+ball in the language of one of the Himalayan tribes from whom we learned
+the game. It is said to have been played in England for the first time
+at Aldershot in 1871.
+
+More interest attaches to Gymkhana, for neither the word nor the thing
+which it signifies is Indian, though both originated in India, and the
+derivation of the word is unknown, though it is scarcely fifty years
+old. Several hybrid derivations have been suggested, none of them
+probable, and I lean to the suggestion that the starting-point of the
+word may have been "jumkhana", a term which, though it is not in
+Forbes's _Hindustani Dictionary,_ I have heard a native apply to a large
+cotton carpet, such as native acrobats, or wrestlers, might spread when
+about to give a performance. Our use of the words Arena, Stage, Boards,
+Footlights, etc., shows how easily a carpet might give name to a place
+of meeting for athletic exercises.
+
+There is another class of words which have come into England through
+returned Anglo-Indians and spread by their own merit. One of these is
+Loot. The dictionary says that it means "to plunder," but it holds more
+than that or any equivalent English word. Perhaps it has scarcely risen
+above the level of slang yet, but the phrase "to run amuck" is
+classical, having been used by both Pope and Dryden. The pedantic
+attempt made by some writers to change the common way of writing it
+because the original Malay term is a single word, "amok," comes too late
+in view of Dryden's line,
+
+ "And runs an Indian muck at all he meets."
+
+Cheese, in the sense of a thing, or rather of "the very thing," must be
+ranked as slang too, though very common. The slang dictionaries give
+fanciful derivations from Anglo-Saxon roots, or suggest that it is a
+perversion of "chose"; but it is a common Hindustani word for a thing,
+and when an Englishman in India finds some article which exactly suits
+his purpose and exclaims, "Ah! that's the cheese," no one needs to ask
+the derivation. If it did not come to us directly from India, then it
+came through the gipsies, for it is one of the many Hindustani words
+which occur in their language. Another word that came from India
+indirectly is Caste, but it is of Portuguese origin. The early
+Portuguese writers applied it ("casta") to the hereditary division of
+Hindu society, and the English adopted it. It has now become
+indispensable. We have no other word that could take its place in the
+lines,
+
+ Her manners had not that repose
+ Which stamps the caste of Vere de Vere.
+
+I must close with two familiar words which have been so long with us
+that few who use them ever suspect that they came from the East--namely,
+Punch and Toddy. The Rev. J. Ovington, who sailed to Bombay in 1689, in
+the ship that carried the glad news of the coronation of William and
+Mary, tells us that, in the East India Company's chief factory at Surat,
+the common table was supplied with "plenty of generous Sherash (Shiraz)
+wine and arak Punch," Arrack (properly "Urk"), sometimes abbreviated to
+Rack, means any distilled spirit, or essence, but is commonly used to
+distinguish country liquor from imported spirits. The Company's factors
+drank it because European wines and beer were at that time very
+expensive in India, and to reconcile it to their palates they made it
+into a brew called Punch, from the Indian word "panch," meaning five,
+because it contained five ingredients--viz. arrack, hot water, limes,
+sugar and spice. This was the ordinary drink of poor Englishmen in India
+for a longtime, and public "Punch-houses" existed in every settlement of
+the East India Company.
+
+Now, one of the principal substances from which country liquor is
+distilled is palm juice, the native name for which, "tadee," has been
+perverted into "toddy" (as in the case of "cot" above-mentioned), and
+"toddy punch" meant the same thing as "arrack punch," Returning
+Anglo-Indians brought the receipt for making this brew to England, and
+lovers of Vanity Fair will remember how the whole course of that story
+was changed by the bowl of "rack punch" which Joseph Sedley ordered at
+Vauxhall, where "everybody had rack punch." How soon both the brew and
+its Indian name took firm root and spread among us appears from the fact
+that, at the Holy Fair described by Burns in the century before last,
+the lads and lasses sit round a table and "steer about the toddy."
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Concerning Animals and Other Matters
+by E.H. Aitken, (AKA Edward Hamilton)
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