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diff --git a/old/1081-h/1081-h.htm b/old/1081-h/1081-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..1c45f10 --- /dev/null +++ b/old/1081-h/1081-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,16894 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html> +<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> +<head> + <meta charset="UTF-8"> + <title> + Dead Souls | Project Gutenberg </title> + <link rel="icon" href="images/cover.jpg" type="image/x-cover"> + + <style> + + body { margin:5%; background:#faebd0; text-align:justify} + P { text-indent: 1em; margin-top: .25em; margin-bottom: .25em; } + H1,H2,H3,H4,H5,H6 { text-align: center; margin-left: 15%; margin-right: 15%; } + hr { width: 50%; text-align: center;} + .foot { margin-left: 20%; margin-right: 20%; text-align: justify; text-indent: -3em; font-size: 90%; } + blockquote {font-size: 97%; font-style: italic; margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%;} + .toc { margin-left: 10%; margin-bottom: .75em;} + pre { font-style: italic; font-size: 90%; margin-left: 10%;} + .p2 {margin-top: 2em;} + .right {text-align: right; text-indent: 0em;} + .center {text-align: center; text-indent: 0em;} + .big {font-size: 1.3em;} + .xbig {font-size: 2em;} + .poetry {margin-left: 10%; text-indent: 0em;} +</style> + </head> + <body> +<div>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 1081 ***</div> + + <h1> + DEAD SOULS + </h1> + <p> + <br> + </p> + <p class="center big"> + By Nikolai Vasilievich Gogol + </p> + + <p class="center big p2"> + Translated by D. J. Hogarth + </p> + <p class="center big"> + Introduction By John Cournos + </p> + + <hr> + + <blockquote> + <p class="toc"> + <span class="big"><b>CONTENTS</b></span> + </p> + <p> + <br> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_INTR"> Introduction By John Cournos </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0002"> PREPARER’S NOTE </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + INTRODUCTION + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0004"> AUTHOR’S PREFACE TO THE FIRST PORTION OF THIS + WORK </a> + </p> + <p> + <br> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_4_0005"> <b>DEAD SOULS</b> </a> + </p> + <p> + <br> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_PART"> <b>PART I</b> </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0001"> CHAPTER I </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0002"> CHAPTER II </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0003"> CHAPTER III </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0004"> CHAPTER IV </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0005"> CHAPTER V </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0006"> CHAPTER VI </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0007"> CHAPTER VII </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0008"> CHAPTER VIII </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0009"> CHAPTER IX </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0010"> CHAPTER X </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0011"> CHAPTER XI </a> + </p> + <p> + <br> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_PART2"> <b>PART II</b> </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0012"> CHAPTER I </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0013"> CHAPTER II </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0014"> CHAPTER III </a> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2HCH0015"> CHAPTER IV </a> + </p> + <p> + <br> + </p> + <p class="toc"> + <a href="#link2H_FOOT"> FOOTNOTES: </a> + </p> + </blockquote> + <p> + <br> <br> + </p> + <hr> + <p> + <br> <br> <a id="link2H_INTR"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <h2> + Introduction By John Cournos + </h2> + <p> + Nikolai Vasilievich Gogol, born at Sorochintsky, Russia, on 31st March + 1809. Obtained government post at St. Petersburg and later an appointment + at the university. Lived in Rome from 1836 to 1848. Died on 21st February + 1852. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2H_4_0002"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h2> + PREPARER’S NOTE + </h2> + <p> + The book this was typed from contains a complete Part I, and a partial + Part II, as it seems only part of Part II survived the adventures + described in the introduction. Where the text notes that pages are missing + from the “original”, this refers to the Russian original, not the + translation. + </p> + <p> + All the foreign words were italicised in the original, a style not + preserved here. Accents and diphthongs have also been left out. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2H_INTR2_"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h2> + INTRODUCTION + </h2> + <p> + Dead Souls, first published in 1842, is the great prose classic of Russia. + That amazing institution, “the Russian novel,” not only began its career + with this unfinished masterpiece by Nikolai Vasil’evich Gogol, but + practically all the Russian masterpieces that have come since have grown + out of it, like the limbs of a single tree. Dostoieffsky goes so far as to + bestow this tribute upon an earlier work by the same author, a short story + entitled The Cloak; this idea has been wittily expressed by another + compatriot, who says: “We have all issued out of Gogol’s Cloak.” + </p> + <p> + Dead Souls, which bears the word “Poem” upon the title page of the + original, has been generally compared to Don Quixote and to the Pickwick + Papers, while E. M. Vogue places its author somewhere between Cervantes + and Le Sage. However considerable the influences of Cervantes and Dickens + may have been—the first in the matter of structure, the other in + background, humour, and detail of characterisation—the predominating + and distinguishing quality of the work is undeniably something foreign to + both and quite peculiar to itself; something which, for want of a better + term, might be called the quality of the Russian soul. The English reader + familiar with the works of Dostoieffsky, Turgenev, and Tolstoi, need + hardly be told what this implies; it might be defined in the words of the + French critic just named as “a tendency to pity.” One might indeed go + further and say that it implies a certain tolerance of one’s characters + even though they be, in the conventional sense, knaves, products, as the + case might be, of conditions or circumstance, which after all is the thing + to be criticised and not the man. But pity and tolerance are rare in + satire, even in clash with it, producing in the result a deep sense of + tragic humour. It is this that makes of Dead Souls a unique work, + peculiarly Gogolian, peculiarly Russian, and distinct from its author’s + Spanish and English masters. + </p> + <p> + Still more profound are the contradictions to be seen in the author’s + personal character; and unfortunately they prevented him from completing + his work. The trouble is that he made his art out of life, and when in his + final years he carried his struggle, as Tolstoi did later, back into life, + he repented of all he had written, and in the frenzy of a wakeful night + burned all his manuscripts, including the second part of Dead Souls, only + fragments of which were saved. There was yet a third part to be written. + Indeed, the second part had been written and burned twice. Accounts differ + as to why he had burned it finally. Religious remorse, fury at adverse + criticism, and despair at not reaching ideal perfection are among the + reasons given. Again it is said that he had destroyed the manuscript with + the others inadvertently. + </p> + <p> + The poet Pushkin, who said of Gogol that “behind his laughter you feel the + unseen tears,” was his chief friend and inspirer. It was he who suggested + the plot of Dead Souls as well as the plot of the earlier work The + Revisor, which is almost the only comedy in Russian. The importance of + both is their introduction of the social element in Russian literature, as + Prince Kropotkin points out. Both hold up the mirror to Russian + officialdom and the effects it has produced on the national character. The + plot of Dead Souls is simple enough, and is said to have been suggested by + an actual episode. + </p> + <p> + It was the day of serfdom in Russia, and a man’s standing was often judged + by the numbers of “souls” he possessed. There was a periodical census of + serfs, say once every ten or twenty years. This being the case, an owner + had to pay a tax on every “soul” registered at the last census, though + some of the serfs might have died in the meantime. Nevertheless, the + system had its material advantages, inasmuch as an owner might borrow + money from a bank on the “dead souls” no less than on the living ones. The + plan of Chichikov, Gogol’s hero-villain, was therefore to make a journey + through Russia and buy up the “dead souls,” at reduced rates of course, + saving their owners the government tax, and acquiring for himself a list + of fictitious serfs, which he meant to mortgage to a bank for a + considerable sum. With this money he would buy an estate and some real + life serfs, and make the beginning of a fortune. + </p> + <p> + Obviously, this plot, which is really no plot at all but merely a ruse to + enable Chichikov to go across Russia in a troika, with Selifan the + coachman as a sort of Russian Sancho Panza, gives Gogol a magnificent + opportunity to reveal his genius as a painter of Russian panorama, peopled + with characteristic native types commonplace enough but drawn in comic + relief. “The comic,” explained the author yet at the beginning of his + career, “is hidden everywhere, only living in the midst of it we are not + conscious of it; but if the artist brings it into his art, on the stage + say, we shall roll about with laughter and only wonder we did not notice + it before.” But the comic in Dead Souls is merely external. Let us see how + Pushkin, who loved to laugh, regarded the work. As Gogol read it aloud to + him from the manuscript the poet grew more and more gloomy and at last + cried out: “God! What a sad country Russia is!” And later he said of it: + “Gogol invents nothing; it is the simple truth, the terrible truth.” + </p> + <p> + The work on one hand was received as nothing less than an exposure of all + Russia—what would foreigners think of it? The liberal elements, + however, the critical Belinsky among them, welcomed it as a revelation, as + an omen of a freer future. Gogol, who had meant to do a service to Russia + and not to heap ridicule upon her, took the criticisms of the Slavophiles + to heart; and he palliated his critics by promising to bring about in the + succeeding parts of his novel the redemption of Chichikov and the other + “knaves and blockheads.” But the “Westerner” Belinsky and others of the + liberal camp were mistrustful. It was about this time (1847) that Gogol + published his Correspondence with Friends, and aroused a literary + controversy that is alive to this day. Tolstoi is to be found among his + apologists. + </p> + <p> + Opinions as to the actual significance of Gogol’s masterpiece differ. Some + consider the author a realist who has drawn with meticulous detail a + picture of Russia; others, Merejkovsky among them, see in him a great + symbolist; the very title Dead Souls is taken to describe the living of + Russia as well as its dead. Chichikov himself is now generally regarded as + a universal character. We find an American professor, William Lyon Phelps + <a href="#linknote-1" id="linknoteref-1"><small>1</small></a>, + of Yale, holding the opinion that “no one can travel far in America + without meeting scores of Chichikovs; indeed, he is an accurate portrait + of the American promoter, of the successful commercial traveller whose + success depends entirely not on the real value and usefulness of his + stock-in-trade, but on his knowledge of human nature and of the persuasive + power of his tongue.” This is also the opinion held by Prince Kropotkin <a + href="#linknote-2" id="linknoteref-2"><small>2</small></a>, + who says: “Chichikov may buy dead souls, or railway shares, or he may + collect funds for some charitable institution, or look for a position in a + bank, but he is an immortal international type; we meet him everywhere; he + is of all lands and of all times; he but takes different forms to suit the + requirements of nationality and time.” + </p> + <p> + Again, the work bears an interesting relation to Gogol himself. A + romantic, writing of realities, he was appalled at the commonplaces of + life, at finding no outlet for his love of colour derived from his Cossack + ancestry. He realised that he had drawn a host of “heroes,” “one more + commonplace than another, that there was not a single palliating + circumstance, that there was not a single place where the reader might + find pause to rest and to console himself, and that when he had finished + the book it was as though he had walked out of an oppressive cellar into + the open air.” He felt perhaps inward need to redeem Chichikov; in + Merejkovsky’s opinion he really wanted to save his own soul, but had + succeeded only in losing it. His last years were spent morbidly; he + suffered torments and ran from place to place like one hunted; but really + always running from himself. Rome was his favourite refuge, and he + returned to it again and again. In 1848, he made a pilgrimage to the Holy + Land, but he could find no peace for his soul. Something of this mood had + reflected itself even much earlier in the Memoirs of a Madman: “Oh, little + mother, save your poor son! Look how they are tormenting him.... There’s + no place for him on earth! He’s being driven!... Oh, little mother, take + pity on thy poor child.” + </p> + <p> + All the contradictions of Gogol’s character are not to be disposed of in a + brief essay. Such a strange combination of the tragic and the comic was + truly seldom seen in one man. He, for one, realised that “it is dangerous + to jest with laughter.” “Everything that I laughed at became sad.” “And + terrible,” adds Merejkovsky. But earlier his humour was lighter, less + tinged with the tragic; in those days Pushkin never failed to be amused by + what Gogol had brought to read to him. Even Revizor (1835), with its + tragic undercurrent, was a trifle compared to Dead Souls, so that one is + not astonished to hear that not only did the Tsar, Nicholas I, give + permission to have it acted, in spite of its being a criticism of official + rottenness, but laughed uproariously, and led the applause. Moreover, he + gave Gogol a grant of money, and asked that its source should not be + revealed to the author lest “he might feel obliged to write from the + official point of view.” + </p> + <p> + Gogol was born at Sorotchinetz, Little Russia, in March 1809. He left + college at nineteen and went to St. Petersburg, where he secured a + position as copying clerk in a government department. He did not keep his + position long, yet long enough to store away in his mind a number of + bureaucratic types which proved useful later. He quite suddenly started + for America with money given to him by his mother for another purpose, but + when he got as far as Lubeck he turned back. He then wanted to become an + actor, but his voice proved not strong enough. Later he wrote a poem which + was unkindly received. As the copies remained unsold, he gathered them all + up at the various shops and burned them in his room. + </p> + <p> + His next effort, Evenings at the Farm of Dikanka (1831) was more + successful. It was a series of gay and colourful pictures of Ukraine, the + land he knew and loved, and if he is occasionally a little over romantic + here and there, he also achieves some beautifully lyrical passages. Then + came another even finer series called Mirgorod, which won the admiration + of Pushkin. Next he planned a “History of Little Russia” and a “History of + the Middle Ages,” this last work to be in eight or nine volumes. The + result of all this study was a beautiful and short Homeric epic in prose, + called Taras Bulba. His appointment to a professorship in history was a + ridiculous episode in his life. After a brilliant first lecture, in which + he had evidently said all he had to say, he settled to a life of boredom + for himself and his pupils. When he resigned he said joyously: “I am once + more a free Cossack.” Between 1834 and 1835 he produced a new series of + stories, including his famous Cloak, which may be regarded as the + legitimate beginning of the Russian novel. + </p> + <p> + Gogol knew little about women, who played an equally minor role in his + life and in his books. This may be partly because his personal appearance + was not prepossessing. He is described by a contemporary as “a little man + with legs too short for his body. He walked crookedly; he was clumsy, + ill-dressed, and rather ridiculous-looking, with his long lock of hair + flapping on his forehead, and his large prominent nose.” + </p> + <p> + From 1835 Gogol spent almost his entire time abroad; some strange unrest—possibly + his Cossack blood—possessed him like a demon, and he never stopped + anywhere very long. After his pilgrimage in 1848 to Jerusalem, he returned + to Moscow, his entire possessions in a little bag; these consisted of + pamphlets, critiques, and newspaper articles mostly inimical to himself. + He wandered about with these from house to house. Everything he had of + value he gave away to the poor. He ceased work entirely. According to all + accounts he spent his last days in praying and fasting. Visions came to + him. His death, which came in 1852, was extremely fantastic. His last + words, uttered in a loud frenzy, were: “A ladder! Quick, a ladder!” This + call for a ladder—“a spiritual ladder,” in the words of Merejkovsky—had + been made on an earlier occasion by a certain Russian saint, who used + almost the same language. “I shall laugh my bitter laugh” <a + href="#linknote-3" id="linknoteref-3"><small>3</small></a> + was the inscription placed on Gogol’s grave. + </p> +<p class="right"> + JOHN COURNOS +</p> + <p> + Evenings on the Farm near the Dikanka, 1829-31; Mirgorod, 1831-33; Taras + Bulba, 1834; Arabesques (includes tales, The Portrait and A Madman’s + Diary), 1831-35; The Cloak, 1835; The Revizor (The Inspector-General), + 1836; Dead Souls, 1842; Correspondence with Friends, 1847. + </p> + <p> + ENGLISH TRANSLATIONS: Cossack Tales (The Night of Christmas Eve, Tarass + Boolba), trans. by G. Tolstoy, 1860; St. John’s Eve and Other Stories, + trans. by Isabel F. Hapgood, New York, Crowell, 1886; Taras Bulba: Also + St. John’s Eve and Other Stories, London, Vizetelly, 1887; Taras Bulba, + trans. by B. C. Baskerville, London, Scott, 1907; The Inspector: a Comedy, + Calcutta, 1890; The Inspector-General, trans. by A. A. Sykes, London, + Scott, 1892; Revizor, trans. for the Yale Dramatic Association by Max S. + Mandell, New Haven, Conn., 1908; Home Life in Russia (adaptation of Dead + Souls), London, Hurst, 1854; Tchitchikoff’s Journey’s; or Dead Souls, + trans. by Isabel F. Hapgood, New York, Crowell, 1886; Dead Souls, London, + Vizetelly, 1887; Dead Souls, London, Maxwell 1887; Meditations on the + Divine Liturgy, trans. by L. Alexeieff, London, A. R. Mowbray and Co., + 1913. + </p> + <p> + LIVES, etc.: (Russian) Kotlyarevsky (N. A.), 1903; Shenrok (V. I.), + Materials for a Biography, 1892; (French) Leger (L.), Nicholas Gogol, + 1914. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2H_4_0004"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h2> + AUTHOR’S PREFACE TO THE FIRST PORTION OF THIS WORK + </h2> + <h3> + Second Edition published in 1846 + </h3> + <p> + From the Author to the Reader + </p> + <p> + Reader, whosoever or wheresoever you be, and whatsoever be your station—whether + that of a member of the higher ranks of society or that of a member of the + plainer walks of life—I beg of you, if God shall have given you any + skill in letters, and my book shall fall into your hands, to extend to me + your assistance. + </p> + <p> + For in the book which lies before you, and which, probably, you have read + in its first edition, there is portrayed a man who is a type taken from + our Russian Empire. This man travels about the Russian land and meets with + folk of every condition—from the nobly-born to the humble toiler. + Him I have taken as a type to show forth the vices and the failings, + rather than the merits and the virtues, of the commonplace Russian + individual; and the characters which revolve around him have also been + selected for the purpose of demonstrating our national weaknesses and + shortcomings. As for men and women of the better sort, I propose to + portray them in subsequent volumes. Probably much of what I have described + is improbable and does not happen as things customarily happen in Russia; + and the reason for that is that for me to learn all that I have wished to + do has been impossible, in that human life is not sufficiently long to + become acquainted with even a hundredth part of what takes place within + the borders of the Russian Empire. Also, carelessness, inexperience, and + lack of time have led to my perpetrating numerous errors and inaccuracies + of detail; with the result that in every line of the book there is + something which calls for correction. For these reasons I beg of you, my + reader, to act also as my corrector. Do not despise the task, for, however + superior be your education, and however lofty your station, and however + insignificant, in your eyes, my book, and however trifling the apparent + labour of correcting and commenting upon that book, I implore you to do as + I have said. And you too, O reader of lowly education and simple status, I + beseech you not to look upon yourself as too ignorant to be able in some + fashion, however small, to help me. Every man who has lived in the world + and mixed with his fellow men will have remarked something which has + remained hidden from the eyes of others; and therefore I beg of you not to + deprive me of your comments, seeing that it cannot be that, should you + read my book with attention, you will have NOTHING to say at some point + therein. + </p> + <p> + For example, how excellent it would be if some reader who is sufficiently + rich in experience and the knowledge of life to be acquainted with the + sort of characters which I have described herein would annotate in detail + the book, without missing a single page, and undertake to read it + precisely as though, laying pen and paper before him, he were first to + peruse a few pages of the work, and then to recall his own life, and the + lives of folk with whom he has come in contact, and everything which he + has seen with his own eyes or has heard of from others, and to proceed to + annotate, in so far as may tally with his own experience or otherwise, + what is set forth in the book, and to jot down the whole exactly as it + stands pictured to his memory, and, lastly, to send me the jottings as + they may issue from his pen, and to continue doing so until he has covered + the entire work! Yes, he would indeed do me a vital service! Of style or + beauty of expression he would need to take no account, for the value of a + book lies in its truth and its actuality rather than in its wording. Nor + would he need to consider my feelings if at any point he should feel + minded to blame or to upbraid me, or to demonstrate the harm rather than + the good which has been done through any lack of thought or verisimilitude + of which I have been guilty. In short, for anything and for everything in + the way of criticism I should be thankful. + </p> + <p> + Also, it would be an excellent thing if some reader in the higher walks of + life, some person who stands remote, both by life and by education, from + the circle of folk which I have pictured in my book, but who knows the + life of the circle in which he himself revolves, would undertake to read + my work in similar fashion, and methodically to recall to his mind any + members of superior social classes whom he has met, and carefully to + observe whether there exists any resemblance between one such class and + another, and whether, at times, there may not be repeated in a higher + sphere what is done in a lower, and likewise to note any additional fact + in the same connection which may occur to him (that is to say, any fact + pertaining to the higher ranks of society which would seem to confirm or + to disprove his conclusions), and, lastly, to record that fact as it may + have occurred within his own experience, while giving full details of + persons (of individual manners, tendencies, and customs) and also of + inanimate surroundings (of dress, furniture, fittings of houses, and so + forth). For I need knowledge of the classes in question, which are the + flower of our people. In fact, this very reason—the reason that I do + not yet know Russian life in all its aspects, and in the degree to which + it is necessary for me to know it in order to become a successful author—is + what has, until now, prevented me from publishing any subsequent volumes + of this story. + </p> + <p> + Again, it would be an excellent thing if some one who is endowed with the + faculty of imagining and vividly picturing to himself the various + situations wherein a character may be placed, and of mentally following up + a character’s career in one field and another—by this I mean some + one who possesses the power of entering into and developing the ideas of + the author whose work he may be reading—would scan each character + herein portrayed, and tell me how each character ought to have acted at a + given juncture, and what, to judge from the beginnings of each character, + ought to have become of that character later, and what new circumstances + might be devised in connection therewith, and what new details might + advantageously be added to those already described. Honestly can I say + that to consider these points against the time when a new edition of my + book may be published in a different and a better form would give me the + greatest possible pleasure. + </p> + <p> + One thing in particular would I ask of any reader who may be willing to + give me the benefit of his advice. That is to say, I would beg of him to + suppose, while recording his remarks, that it is for the benefit of a man + in no way his equal in education, or similar to him in tastes and ideas, + or capable of apprehending criticisms without full explanation appended, + that he is doing so. Rather would I ask such a reader to suppose that + before him there stands a man of incomparably inferior enlightenment and + schooling—a rude country bumpkin whose life, throughout, has been + passed in retirement—a bumpkin to whom it is necessary to explain + each circumstance in detail, while never forgetting to be as simple of + speech as though he were a child, and at every step there were a danger of + employing terms beyond his understanding. Should these precautions be kept + constantly in view by any reader undertaking to annotate my book, that + reader’s remarks will exceed in weight and interest even his own + expectations, and will bring me very real advantage. + </p> + <p> + Thus, provided that my earnest request be heeded by my readers, and that + among them there be found a few kind spirits to do as I desire, the + following is the manner in which I would request them to transmit their + notes for my consideration. Inscribing the package with my name, let them + then enclose that package in a second one addressed either to the Rector + of the University of St. Petersburg or to Professor Shevirev of the + University of Moscow, according as the one or the other of those two + cities may be the nearer to the sender. + </p> + <p> + Lastly, while thanking all journalists and litterateurs for their + previously published criticisms of my book—criticisms which, in + spite of a spice of that intemperance and prejudice which is common to all + humanity, have proved of the greatest use both to my head and to my heart—I + beg of such writers again to favour me with their reviews. For in all + sincerity I can assure them that whatsoever they may be pleased to say for + my improvement and my instruction will be received by me with naught but + gratitude. + </p> + <p> + <br> <br> + </p> + <hr> + <p> + <br> <br> <a id="link2H_4_0005"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <p class="center xbig"> + DEAD SOULS + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2H_PART"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h2> + PART I + </h2> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0001"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER I + </h3> + <p> + To the door of an inn in the provincial town of N. there drew up a smart + britchka—a light spring-carriage of the sort affected by bachelors, + retired lieutenant-colonels, staff-captains, land-owners possessed of + about a hundred souls, and, in short, all persons who rank as gentlemen of + the intermediate category. In the britchka was seated such a gentleman—a + man who, though not handsome, was not ill-favoured, not over-fat, and not + over-thin. Also, though not over-elderly, he was not over-young. His + arrival produced no stir in the town, and was accompanied by no particular + incident, beyond that a couple of peasants who happened to be standing at + the door of a dramshop exchanged a few comments with reference to the + equipage rather than to the individual who was seated in it. “Look at that + carriage,” one of them said to the other. “Think you it will be going as + far as Moscow?” “I think it will,” replied his companion. “But not as far + as Kazan, eh?” “No, not as far as Kazan.” With that the conversation + ended. Presently, as the britchka was approaching the inn, it was met by a + young man in a pair of very short, very tight breeches of white dimity, a + quasi-fashionable frockcoat, and a dickey fastened with a pistol-shaped + bronze tie-pin. The young man turned his head as he passed the britchka + and eyed it attentively; after which he clapped his hand to his cap (which + was in danger of being removed by the wind) and resumed his way. On the + vehicle reaching the inn door, its occupant found standing there to + welcome him the polevoi, or waiter, of the establishment—an + individual of such nimble and brisk movement that even to distinguish the + character of his face was impossible. Running out with a napkin in one + hand and his lanky form clad in a tailcoat, reaching almost to the nape of + his neck, he tossed back his locks, and escorted the gentleman upstairs, + along a wooden gallery, and so to the bedchamber which God had prepared + for the gentleman’s reception. The said bedchamber was of quite ordinary + appearance, since the inn belonged to the species to be found in all + provincial towns—the species wherein, for two roubles a day, + travellers may obtain a room swarming with black-beetles, and + communicating by a doorway with the apartment adjoining. True, the doorway + may be blocked up with a wardrobe; yet behind it, in all probability, + there will be standing a silent, motionless neighbour whose ears are + burning to learn every possible detail concerning the latest arrival. The + inn’s exterior corresponded with its interior. Long, and consisting only + of two storeys, the building had its lower half destitute of stucco; with + the result that the dark-red bricks, originally more or less dingy, had + grown yet dingier under the influence of atmospheric changes. As for the + upper half of the building, it was, of course, painted the usual tint of + unfading yellow. Within, on the ground floor, there stood a number of + benches heaped with horse-collars, rope, and sheepskins; while the + window-seat accommodated a sbitentshik <a href="#linknote-4" id="linknoteref-4"><small>4</small></a>, cheek by + jowl with a samovar <a href="#linknote-5" id="linknoteref-5"><small>5</small></a>—the latter so closely + resembling the former in appearance that, but for the fact of the samovar + possessing a pitch-black lip, the samovar and the sbitentshik might have + been two of a pair. + </p> + <p> + During the traveller’s inspection of his room his luggage was brought into + the apartment. First came a portmanteau of white leather whose raggedness + indicated that the receptacle had made several previous journeys. The + bearers of the same were the gentleman’s coachman, Selifan (a little man + in a large overcoat), and the gentleman’s valet, Petrushka—the + latter a fellow of about thirty, clad in a worn, over-ample jacket which + formerly had graced his master’s shoulders, and possessed of a nose and a + pair of lips whose coarseness communicated to his face rather a sullen + expression. Behind the portmanteau came a small dispatch-box of redwood, + lined with birch bark, a boot-case, and (wrapped in blue paper) a roast + fowl; all of which having been deposited, the coachman departed to look + after his horses, and the valet to establish himself in the little dark + anteroom or kennel where already he had stored a cloak, a bagful of + livery, and his own peculiar smell. Pressing the narrow bedstead back + against the wall, he covered it with the tiny remnant of mattress—a + remnant as thin and flat (perhaps also as greasy) as a pancake—which + he had managed to beg of the landlord of the establishment. + </p> + <p> + While the attendants had been thus setting things straight the gentleman + had repaired to the common parlour. The appearance of common parlours of + the kind is known to every one who travels. Always they have varnished + walls which, grown black in their upper portions with tobacco smoke, are, + in their lower, grown shiny with the friction of customers’ backs—more + especially with that of the backs of such local tradesmen as, on + market-days, make it their regular practice to resort to the local + hostelry for a glass of tea. Also, parlours of this kind invariably + contain smutty ceilings, an equally smutty chandelier, a number of pendent + shades which jump and rattle whenever the waiter scurries across the + shabby oilcloth with a trayful of glasses (the glasses looking like a + flock of birds roosting by the seashore), and a selection of oil + paintings. In short, there are certain objects which one sees in every + inn. In the present case the only outstanding feature of the room was the + fact that in one of the paintings a nymph was portrayed as possessing + breasts of a size such as the reader can never in his life have beheld. A + similar caricaturing of nature is to be noted in the historical pictures + (of unknown origin, period, and creation) which reach us—sometimes + through the instrumentality of Russian magnates who profess to be + connoisseurs of art—from Italy; owing to the said magnates having + made such purchases solely on the advice of the couriers who have escorted + them. + </p> + <p> + To resume, however—our traveller removed his cap, and divested his + neck of a parti-coloured woollen scarf of the kind which a wife makes for + her husband with her own hands, while accompanying the gift with + interminable injunctions as to how best such a garment ought to be folded. + True, bachelors also wear similar gauds, but, in their case, God alone + knows who may have manufactured the articles! For my part, I cannot endure + them. Having unfolded the scarf, the gentleman ordered dinner, and whilst + the various dishes were being got ready—cabbage soup, a pie several + weeks old, a dish of marrow and peas, a dish of sausages and cabbage, a + roast fowl, some salted cucumber, and the sweet tart which stands + perpetually ready for use in such establishments; whilst, I say, these + things were either being warmed up or brought in cold, the gentleman + induced the waiter to retail certain fragments of tittle-tattle concerning + the late landlord of the hostelry, the amount of income which the hostelry + produced, and the character of its present proprietor. To the + last-mentioned inquiry the waiter returned the answer invariably given in + such cases—namely, “My master is a terribly hard man, sir.” Curious + that in enlightened Russia so many people cannot even take a meal at an + inn without chattering to the attendant and making free with him! + Nevertheless not ALL the questions which the gentleman asked were aimless + ones, for he inquired who was Governor of the town, who President of the + Local Council, and who Public Prosecutor. In short, he omitted no single + official of note, while asking also (though with an air of detachment) the + most exact particulars concerning the landowners of the neighbourhood. + Which of them, he inquired, possessed serfs, and how many of them? How far + from the town did those landowners reside? What was the character of each + landowner, and was he in the habit of paying frequent visits to the town? + The gentleman also made searching inquiries concerning the hygienic + condition of the countryside. Was there, he asked, much sickness about—whether + sporadic fever, fatal forms of ague, smallpox, or what not? Yet, though + his solicitude concerning these matters showed more than ordinary + curiosity, his bearing retained its gravity unimpaired, and from time to + time he blew his nose with portentous fervour. Indeed, the manner in which + he accomplished this latter feat was marvellous in the extreme, for, + though that member emitted sounds equal to those of a trumpet in + intensity, he could yet, with his accompanying air of guileless dignity, + evoke the waiter’s undivided respect—so much so that, whenever the + sounds of the nose reached that menial’s ears, he would shake back his + locks, straighten himself into a posture of marked solicitude, and inquire + afresh, with head slightly inclined, whether the gentleman happened to + require anything further. After dinner the guest consumed a cup of coffee, + and then, seating himself upon the sofa, with, behind him, one of those + wool-covered cushions which, in Russian taverns, resemble nothing so much + as a cobblestone or a brick, fell to snoring; whereafter, returning with a + start to consciousness, he ordered himself to be conducted to his room, + flung himself at full length upon the bed, and once more slept soundly for + a couple of hours. Aroused, eventually, by the waiter, he, at the latter’s + request, inscribed a fragment of paper with his name, his surname, and his + rank (for communication, in accordance with the law, to the police): and + on that paper the waiter, leaning forward from the corridor, read, + syllable by syllable: “Paul Ivanovitch Chichikov, Collegiate Councillor—Landowner—Travelling + on Private Affairs.” The waiter had just time to accomplish this feat + before Paul Ivanovitch Chichikov set forth to inspect the town. Apparently + the place succeeded in satisfying him, and, to tell the truth, it was at + least up to the usual standard of our provincial capitals. Where the + staring yellow of stone edifices did not greet his eye he found himself + confronted with the more modest grey of wooden ones; which, consisting, + for the most part, of one or two storeys (added to the range of attics + which provincial architects love so well), looked almost lost amid the + expanses of street and intervening medleys of broken or half-finished + partition-walls. At other points evidence of more life and movement was to + be seen, and here the houses stood crowded together and displayed + dilapidated, rain-blurred signboards whereon boots or cakes or pairs of + blue breeches inscribed “Arshavski, Tailor,” and so forth, were depicted. + Over a shop containing hats and caps was written “Vassili Thedorov, + Foreigner”; while, at another spot, a signboard portrayed a billiard table + and two players—the latter clad in frockcoats of the kind usually + affected by actors whose part it is to enter the stage during the closing + act of a piece, even though, with arms sharply crooked and legs slightly + bent, the said billiard players were taking the most careful aim, but + succeeding only in making abortive strokes in the air. Each emporium of + the sort had written over it: “This is the best establishment of its kind + in the town.” Also, al fresco in the streets there stood tables heaped + with nuts, soap, and gingerbread (the latter but little distinguishable + from the soap), and at an eating-house there was displayed the sign of a + plump fish transfixed with a gaff. But the sign most frequently to be + discerned was the insignia of the State, the double-headed eagle (now + replaced, in this connection, with the laconic inscription “Dramshop”). As + for the paving of the town, it was uniformly bad. + </p> + <p> + The gentleman peered also into the municipal gardens, which contained only + a few sorry trees that were poorly selected, requiring to be propped with + oil-painted, triangular green supports, and able to boast of a height no + greater than that of an ordinary walking-stick. Yet recently the local + paper had said (apropos of a gala) that, “Thanks to the efforts of our + Civil Governor, the town has become enriched with a pleasaunce full of + umbrageous, spaciously-branching trees. Even on the most sultry day they + afford agreeable shade, and indeed gratifying was it to see the hearts of + our citizens panting with an impulse of gratitude as their eyes shed tears + in recognition of all that their Governor has done for them!” + </p> + <p> + Next, after inquiring of a gendarme as to the best ways and means of + finding the local council, the local law-courts, and the local Governor, + should he (Chichikov) have need of them, the gentleman went on to inspect + the river which ran through the town. En route he tore off a notice + affixed to a post, in order that he might the more conveniently read it + after his return to the inn. Also, he bestowed upon a lady of pleasant + exterior who, escorted by a footman laden with a bundle, happened to be + passing along a wooden sidewalk a prolonged stare. Lastly, he threw around + him a comprehensive glance (as though to fix in his mind the general + topography of the place) and betook himself home. There, gently aided by + the waiter, he ascended the stairs to his bedroom, drank a glass of tea, + and, seating himself at the table, called for a candle; which having been + brought him, he produced from his pocket the notice, held it close to the + flame, and conned its tenour—slightly contracting his right eye as + he did so. Yet there was little in the notice to call for remark. All that + it said was that shortly one of Kotzebue’s <a href="#linknote-6" id="linknoteref-6"><small>6</small></a> plays would + be given, and that one of the parts in the play was to be taken by a + certain Monsieur Poplevin, and another by a certain Mademoiselle Ziablova, + while the remaining parts were to be filled by a number of less important + personages. Nevertheless the gentleman perused the notice with careful + attention, and even jotted down the prices to be asked for seats for the + performance. Also, he remarked that the bill had been printed in the press + of the Provincial Government. Next, he turned over the paper, in order to + see if anything further was to be read on the reverse side; but, finding + nothing there, he refolded the document, placed it in the box which served + him as a receptacle for odds and ends, and brought the day to a close with + a portion of cold veal, a bottle of pickles, and a sound sleep. + </p> + <p> + The following day he devoted to paying calls upon the various municipal + officials—a first, and a very respectful, visit being paid to the + Governor. This personage turned out to resemble Chichikov himself in that + he was neither fat nor thin. Also, he wore the riband of the order of + Saint Anna about his neck, and was reported to have been recommended also + for the star. For the rest, he was large and good-natured, and had a habit + of amusing himself with occasional spells of knitting. Next, Chichikov + repaired to the Vice-Governor’s, and thence to the house of the Public + Prosecutor, to that of the President of the Local Council, to that of the + Chief of Police, to that of the Commissioner of Taxes, and to that of the + local Director of State Factories. True, the task of remembering every + big-wig in this world of ours is not a very easy one; but at least our + visitor displayed the greatest activity in his work of paying calls, + seeing that he went so far as to pay his respects also to the Inspector of + the Municipal Department of Medicine and to the City Architect. Thereafter + he sat thoughtfully in his britchka—plunged in meditation on the + subject of whom else it might be well to visit. However, not a single + magnate had been neglected, and in conversation with his hosts he had + contrived to flatter each separate one. For instance to the Governor he + had hinted that a stranger, on arriving in his, the Governor’s province, + would conceive that he had reached Paradise, so velvety were the roads. + “Governors who appoint capable subordinates,” had said Chichikov, “are + deserving of the most ample meed of praise.” Again, to the Chief of Police + our hero had passed a most gratifying remark on the subject of the local + gendarmery; while in his conversation with the Vice-Governor and the + President of the Local Council (neither of whom had, as yet, risen above + the rank of State Councillor) he had twice been guilty of the gaucherie of + addressing his interlocutors with the title of “Your Excellency”—a + blunder which had not failed to delight them. In the result the Governor + had invited him to a reception the same evening, and certain other + officials had followed suit by inviting him, one of them to dinner, a + second to a tea-party, and so forth, and so forth. + </p> + <p> + Of himself, however, the traveller had spoken little; or, if he had spoken + at any length, he had done so in a general sort of way and with marked + modesty. Indeed, at moments of the kind his discourse had assumed + something of a literary vein, in that invariably he had stated that, being + a worm of no account in the world, he was deserving of no consideration at + the hands of his fellows; that in his time he had undergone many strange + experiences; that subsequently he had suffered much in the cause of Truth; + that he had many enemies seeking his life; and that, being desirous of + rest, he was now engaged in searching for a spot wherein to dwell—wherefore, + having stumbled upon the town in which he now found himself, he had + considered it his bounden duty to evince his respect for the chief + authorities of the place. This, and no more, was all that, for the moment, + the town succeeded in learning about the new arrival. Naturally he lost no + time in presenting himself at the Governor’s evening party. First, + however, his preparations for that function occupied a space of over two + hours, and necessitated an attention to his toilet of a kind not commonly + seen. That is to say, after a brief post-prandial nap he called for soap + and water, and spent a considerable period in the task of scrubbing his + cheeks (which, for the purpose, he supported from within with his tongue) + and then of drying his full, round face, from the ears downwards, with a + towel which he took from the waiter’s shoulder. Twice he snorted into the + waiter’s countenance as he did this, and then he posted himself in front + of the mirror, donned a false shirt-front, plucked out a couple of hairs + which were protruding from his nose, and appeared vested in a frockcoat of + bilberry-coloured check. Thereafter driving through broad streets sparsely + lighted with lanterns, he arrived at the Governor’s residence to find it + illuminated as for a ball. Barouches with gleaming lamps, a couple of + gendarmes posted before the doors, a babel of postillions’ cries—nothing + of a kind likely to be impressive was wanting; and, on reaching the salon, + the visitor actually found himself obliged to close his eyes for a moment, + so strong was the mingled sheen of lamps, candles, and feminine apparel. + Everything seemed suffused with light, and everywhere, flitting and + flashing, were to be seen black coats—even as on a hot summer’s day + flies revolve around a sugar loaf while the old housekeeper is cutting it + into cubes before the open window, and the children of the house crowd + around her to watch the movements of her rugged hands as those members ply + the smoking pestle; and airy squadrons of flies, borne on the breeze, + enter boldly, as though free of the house, and, taking advantage of the + fact that the glare of the sunshine is troubling the old lady’s sight, + disperse themselves over broken and unbroken fragments alike, even though + the lethargy induced by the opulence of summer and the rich shower of + dainties to be encountered at every step has induced them to enter less + for the purpose of eating than for that of showing themselves in public, + of parading up and down the sugar loaf, of rubbing both their hindquarters + and their fore against one another, of cleaning their bodies under the + wings, of extending their forelegs over their heads and grooming + themselves, and of flying out of the window again to return with other + predatory squadrons. Indeed, so dazed was Chichikov that scarcely did he + realise that the Governor was taking him by the arm and presenting him to + his (the Governor’s) lady. Yet the newly-arrived guest kept his head + sufficiently to contrive to murmur some such compliment as might fittingly + come from a middle-aged individual of a rank neither excessively high nor + excessively low. Next, when couples had been formed for dancing and the + remainder of the company found itself pressed back against the walls, + Chichikov folded his arms, and carefully scrutinised the dancers. Some of + the ladies were dressed well and in the fashion, while the remainder were + clad in such garments as God usually bestows upon a provincial town. Also + here, as elsewhere, the men belonged to two separate and distinct + categories; one of which comprised slender individuals who, flitting + around the ladies, were scarcely to be distinguished from denizens of the + metropolis, so carefully, so artistically, groomed were their whiskers, so + presentable their oval, clean-shaven faces, so easy the manner of their + dancing attendance upon their womenfolk, so glib their French conversation + as they quizzed their female companions. As for the other category, it + comprised individuals who, stout, or of the same build as Chichikov (that + is to say, neither very portly nor very lean), backed and sidled away from + the ladies, and kept peering hither and thither to see whether the + Governor’s footmen had set out green tables for whist. Their features were + full and plump, some of them had beards, and in no case was their hair + curled or waved or arranged in what the French call “the devil-may-care” + style. On the contrary, their heads were either close-cropped or brushed + very smooth, and their faces were round and firm. This category + represented the more respectable officials of the town. In passing, I may + say that in business matters fat men always prove superior to their leaner + brethren; which is probably the reason why the latter are mostly to be + found in the Political Police, or acting as mere ciphers whose existence + is a purely hopeless, airy, trivial one. Again, stout individuals never + take a back seat, but always a front one, and, wheresoever it be, they sit + firmly, and with confidence, and decline to budge even though the seat + crack and bend with their weight. For comeliness of exterior they care not + a rap, and therefore a dress coat sits less easily on their figures than + is the case with figures of leaner individuals. Yet invariably fat men + amass the greater wealth. In three years’ time a thin man will not have a + single serf whom he has left unpledged; whereas—well, pray look at a + fat man’s fortunes, and what will you see? First of all a suburban villa, + and then a larger suburban villa, and then a villa close to a town, and + lastly a country estate which comprises every amenity! That is to say, + having served both God and the State, the stout individual has won + universal respect, and will end by retiring from business, reordering his + mode of life, and becoming a Russian landowner—in other words, a + fine gentleman who dispenses hospitality, lives in comfort and luxury, and + is destined to leave his property to heirs who are purposing to squander + the same on foreign travel. + </p> + <p> + That the foregoing represents pretty much the gist of Chichikov’s + reflections as he stood watching the company I will not attempt to deny. + And of those reflections the upshot was that he decided to join himself to + the stouter section of the guests, among whom he had already recognised + several familiar faces—namely, those of the Public Prosecutor (a man + with beetling brows over eyes which seemed to be saying with a wink, “Come + into the next room, my friend, for I have something to say to you”—though, + in the main, their owner was a man of grave and taciturn habit), of the + Postmaster (an insignificant-looking individual, yet a would-be wit and a + philosopher), and of the President of the Local Council (a man of much + amiability and good sense). These three personages greeted Chichikov as an + old acquaintance, and to their salutations he responded with a sidelong, + yet a sufficiently civil, bow. Also, he became acquainted with an + extremely unctuous and approachable landowner named Manilov, and with a + landowner of more uncouth exterior named Sobakevitch—the latter of + whom began the acquaintance by treading heavily upon Chichikov’s toes, and + then begging his pardon. Next, Chichikov received an offer of a “cut in” + at whist, and accepted the same with his usual courteous inclination of + the head. Seating themselves at a green table, the party did not rise + therefrom till supper time; and during that period all conversation + between the players became hushed, as is the custom when men have given + themselves up to a really serious pursuit. Even the Postmaster—a + talkative man by nature—had no sooner taken the cards into his hands + than he assumed an expression of profound thought, pursed his lips, and + retained this attitude unchanged throughout the game. Only when playing a + court card was it his custom to strike the table with his fist, and to + exclaim (if the card happened to be a queen), “Now, old popadia <a + href="#linknote-7" id="linknoteref-7"><small>7</small></a>!” + and (if the card happened to be a king), “Now, peasant of Tambov!” To + which ejaculations invariably the President of the Local Council retorted, + “Ah, I have him by the ears, I have him by the ears!” And from the + neighbourhood of the table other strong ejaculations relative to the play + would arise, interposed with one or another of those nicknames which + participants in a game are apt to apply to members of the various suits. I + need hardly add that, the game over, the players fell to quarrelling, and + that in the dispute our friend joined, though so artfully as to let every + one see that, in spite of the fact that he was wrangling, he was doing so + only in the most amicable fashion possible. Never did he say outright, + “You played the wrong card at such and such a point.” No, he always + employed some such phrase as, “You permitted yourself to make a slip, and + thus afforded me the honour of covering your deuce.” Indeed, the better to + keep in accord with his antagonists, he kept offering them his + silver-enamelled snuff-box (at the bottom of which lay a couple of + violets, placed there for the sake of their scent). In particular did the + newcomer pay attention to landowners Manilov and Sobakevitch; so much so + that his haste to arrive on good terms with them led to his leaving the + President and the Postmaster rather in the shade. At the same time, + certain questions which he put to those two landowners evinced not only + curiosity, but also a certain amount of sound intelligence; for he began + by asking how many peasant souls each of them possessed, and how their + affairs happened at present to be situated, and then proceeded to + enlighten himself also as their standing and their families. Indeed, it + was not long before he had succeeded in fairly enchanting his new friends. + In particular did Manilov—a man still in his prime, and possessed of + a pair of eyes which, sweet as sugar, blinked whenever he laughed—find + himself unable to make enough of his enchanter. Clasping Chichikov long + and fervently by the hand, he besought him to do him, Manilov, the honour + of visiting his country house (which he declared to lie at a distance of + not more than fifteen versts from the boundaries of the town); and in + return Chichikov averred (with an exceedingly affable bow and a most + sincere handshake) that he was prepared not only to fulfil his friend’s + behest, but also to look upon the fulfilling of it as a sacred duty. In + the same way Sobakevitch said to him laconically: “And do you pay ME a + visit,” and then proceeded to shuffle a pair of boots of such dimensions + that to find a pair to correspond with them would have been indeed + difficult—more especially at the present day, when the race of epic + heroes is beginning to die out in Russia. + </p> + <p> + Next day Chichikov dined and spent the evening at the house of the Chief + of Police—a residence where, three hours after dinner, every one sat + down to whist, and remained so seated until two o’clock in the morning. On + this occasion Chichikov made the acquaintance of, among others, a + landowner named Nozdrev—a dissipated little fellow of thirty who had + no sooner exchanged three or four words with his new acquaintance than he + began to address him in the second person singular. Yet although he did + the same to the Chief of Police and the Public Prosecutor, the company had + no sooner seated themselves at the card-table than both the one and the + other of these functionaries started to keep a careful eye upon Nozdrev’s + tricks, and to watch practically every card which he played. The following + evening Chichikov spent with the President of the Local Council, who + received his guests—even though the latter included two ladies—in + a greasy dressing-gown. Upon that followed an evening at the + Vice-Governor’s, a large dinner party at the house of the Commissioner of + Taxes, a smaller dinner-party at the house of the Public Prosecutor (a + very wealthy man), and a subsequent reception given by the Mayor. In + short, not an hour of the day did Chichikov find himself forced to spend + at home, and his return to the inn became necessary only for the purposes + of sleeping. Somehow or other he had landed on his feet, and everywhere he + figured as an experienced man of the world. No matter what the + conversation chanced to be about, he always contrived to maintain his part + in the same. Did the discourse turn upon horse-breeding, upon + horse-breeding he happened to be peculiarly well-qualified to speak. Did + the company fall to discussing well-bred dogs, at once he had remarks of + the most pertinent kind possible to offer. Did the company touch upon a + prosecution which had recently been carried out by the Excise Department, + instantly he showed that he too was not wholly unacquainted with legal + affairs. Did an opinion chance to be expressed concerning billiards, on + that subject too he was at least able to avoid committing a blunder. Did a + reference occur to virtue, concerning virtue he hastened to deliver + himself in a way which brought tears to every eye. Did the subject in hand + happen to be the distilling of brandy—well, that was a matter + concerning which he had the soundest of knowledge. Did any one happen to + mention Customs officials and inspectors, from that moment he expatiated + as though he too had been both a minor functionary and a major. Yet a + remarkable fact was the circumstance that he always contrived to temper + his omniscience with a certain readiness to give way, a certain ability so + to keep a rein upon himself that never did his utterances become too loud + or too soft, or transcend what was perfectly befitting. In a word, he was + always a gentleman of excellent manners, and every official in the place + felt pleased when he saw him enter the door. Thus the Governor gave it as + his opinion that Chichikov was a man of excellent intentions; the Public + Prosecutor, that he was a good man of business; the Chief of Gendarmery, + that he was a man of education; the President of the Local Council, that + he was a man of breeding and refinement; and the wife of the Chief of + Gendarmery, that his politeness of behaviour was equalled only by his + affability of bearing. Nay, even Sobakevitch—who as a rule never + spoke well of ANY ONE—said to his lanky wife when, on returning late + from the town, he undressed and betook himself to bed by her side: “My + dear, this evening, after dining with the Chief of Police, I went on to + the Governor’s, and met there, among others, a certain Paul Ivanovitch + Chichikov, who is a Collegiate Councillor and a very pleasant fellow.” To + this his spouse replied “Hm!” and then dealt him a hearty kick in the + ribs. + </p> + <p> + Such were the flattering opinions earned by the newcomer to the town; and + these opinions he retained until the time when a certain speciality of + his, a certain scheme of his (the reader will learn presently what it + was), plunged the majority of the townsfolk into a sea of perplexity. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0002"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER II + </h3> + <p> + For more than two weeks the visitor lived amid a round of evening parties + and dinners; wherefore he spent (as the saying goes) a very pleasant time. + Finally he decided to extend his visits beyond the urban boundaries by + going and calling upon landowners Manilov and Sobakevitch, seeing that he + had promised on his honour to do so. Yet what really incited him to this + may have been a more essential cause, a matter of greater gravity, a + purpose which stood nearer to his heart, than the motive which I have just + given; and of that purpose the reader will learn if only he will have the + patience to read this prefatory narrative (which, lengthy though it be, + may yet develop and expand in proportion as we approach the denouement + with which the present work is destined to be crowned). + </p> + <p> + One evening, therefore, Selifan the coachman received orders to have the + horses harnessed in good time next morning; while Petrushka received + orders to remain behind, for the purpose of looking after the portmanteau + and the room. In passing, the reader may care to become more fully + acquainted with the two serving-men of whom I have spoken. Naturally, they + were not persons of much note, but merely what folk call characters of + secondary, or even of tertiary, importance. Yet, despite the fact that the + springs and the thread of this romance will not DEPEND upon them, but only + touch upon them, and occasionally include them, the author has a passion + for circumstantiality, and, like the average Russian, such a desire for + accuracy as even a German could not rival. To what the reader already + knows concerning the personages in hand it is therefore necessary to add + that Petrushka usually wore a cast-off brown jacket of a size too large + for him, as also that he had (according to the custom of individuals of + his calling) a pair of thick lips and a very prominent nose. In + temperament he was taciturn rather than loquacious, and he cherished a + yearning for self-education. That is to say, he loved to read books, even + though their contents came alike to him whether they were books of heroic + adventure or mere grammars or liturgical compendia. As I say, he perused + every book with an equal amount of attention, and, had he been offered a + work on chemistry, would have accepted that also. Not the words which he + read, but the mere solace derived from the act of reading, was what + especially pleased his mind; even though at any moment there might launch + itself from the page some devil-sent word whereof he could make neither + head nor tail. For the most part, his task of reading was performed in a + recumbent position in the anteroom; which circumstance ended by causing + his mattress to become as ragged and as thin as a wafer. In addition to + his love of poring over books, he could boast of two habits which + constituted two other essential features of his character—namely, a + habit of retiring to rest in his clothes (that is to say, in the brown + jacket above-mentioned) and a habit of everywhere bearing with him his own + peculiar atmosphere, his own peculiar smell—a smell which filled any + lodging with such subtlety that he needed but to make up his bed anywhere, + even in a room hitherto untenanted, and to drag thither his greatcoat and + other impedimenta, for that room at once to assume an air of having been + lived in during the past ten years. Nevertheless, though a fastidious, and + even an irritable, man, Chichikov would merely frown when his nose caught + this smell amid the freshness of the morning, and exclaim with a toss of + his head: “The devil only knows what is up with you! Surely you sweat a + good deal, do you not? The best thing you can do is to go and take a + bath.” To this Petrushka would make no reply, but, approaching, brush in + hand, the spot where his master’s coat would be pendent, or starting to + arrange one and another article in order, would strive to seem wholly + immersed in his work. Yet of what was he thinking as he remained thus + silent? Perhaps he was saying to himself: “My master is a good fellow, but + for him to keep on saying the same thing forty times over is a little + wearisome.” Only God knows and sees all things; wherefore for a mere human + being to know what is in the mind of a servant while his master is + scolding him is wholly impossible. However, no more need be said about + Petrushka. On the other hand, Coachman Selifan— + </p> + <p> + But here let me remark that I do not like engaging the reader’s attention + in connection with persons of a lower class than himself; for experience + has taught me that we do not willingly familiarise ourselves with the + lower orders—that it is the custom of the average Russian to yearn + exclusively for information concerning persons on the higher rungs of the + social ladder. In fact, even a bowing acquaintance with a prince or a lord + counts, in his eyes, for more than do the most intimate of relations with + ordinary folk. For the same reason the author feels apprehensive on his + hero’s account, seeing that he has made that hero a mere Collegiate + Councillor—a mere person with whom Aulic Councillors might consort, + but upon whom persons of the grade of full General <a href="#linknote-8" + id="linknoteref-8"><small>8</small></a> would + probably bestow one of those glances proper to a man who is cringing at + their august feet. Worse still, such persons of the grade of General are + likely to treat Chichikov with studied negligence—and to an author + studied negligence spells death. + </p> + <p> + However, in spite of the distressfulness of the foregoing possibilities, + it is time that I returned to my hero. After issuing, overnight, the + necessary orders, he awoke early, washed himself, rubbed himself from head + to foot with a wet sponge (a performance executed only on Sundays—and + the day in question happened to be a Sunday), shaved his face with such + care that his cheeks issued of absolutely satin-like smoothness and + polish, donned first his bilberry-coloured, spotted frockcoat, and then + his bearskin overcoat, descended the staircase (attended, throughout, by + the waiter) and entered his britchka. With a loud rattle the vehicle left + the inn-yard, and issued into the street. A passing priest doffed his cap, + and a few urchins in grimy shirts shouted, “Gentleman, please give a poor + orphan a trifle!” Presently the driver noticed that a sturdy young rascal + was on the point of climbing onto the splashboard; wherefore he cracked + his whip and the britchka leapt forward with increased speed over the + cobblestones. At last, with a feeling of relief, the travellers caught + sight of macadam ahead, which promised an end both to the cobblestones and + to sundry other annoyances. And, sure enough, after his head had been + bumped a few more times against the boot of the conveyance, Chichikov + found himself bowling over softer ground. On the town receding into the + distance, the sides of the road began to be varied with the usual + hillocks, fir trees, clumps of young pine, trees with old, scarred trunks, + bushes of wild juniper, and so forth. Presently there came into view also + strings of country villas which, with their carved supports and grey roofs + (the latter looking like pendent, embroidered tablecloths), resembled, + rather, bundles of old faggots. Likewise the customary peasants, dressed + in sheepskin jackets, could be seen yawning on benches before their huts, + while their womenfolk, fat of feature and swathed of bosom, gazed out of + upper windows, and the windows below displayed, here a peering calf, and + there the unsightly jaws of a pig. In short, the view was one of the + familiar type. After passing the fifteenth verst-stone Chichikov suddenly + recollected that, according to Manilov, fifteen versts was the exact + distance between his country house and the town; but the sixteenth verst + stone flew by, and the said country house was still nowhere to be seen. In + fact, but for the circumstance that the travellers happened to encounter a + couple of peasants, they would have come on their errand in vain. To a + query as to whether the country house known as Zamanilovka was anywhere in + the neighbourhood the peasants replied by doffing their caps; after which + one of them who seemed to boast of a little more intelligence than his + companion, and who wore a wedge-shaped beard, made answer: + </p> + <p> + “Perhaps you mean Manilovka—not ZAmanilovka?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, yes—Manilovka.” + </p> + <p> + “Manilovka, eh? Well, you must continue for another verst, and then you + will see it straight before you, on the right.” + </p> + <p> + “On the right?” re-echoed the coachman. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, on the right,” affirmed the peasant. “You are on the proper road for + Manilovka, but ZAmanilovka—well, there is no such place. The house + you mean is called Manilovka because Manilovka is its name; but no house + at all is called ZAmanilovka. The house you mean stands there, on that + hill, and is a stone house in which a gentleman lives, and its name is + Manilovka; but ZAmanilovka does not stand hereabouts, nor ever has stood.” + </p> + <p> + So the travellers proceeded in search of Manilovka, and, after driving an + additional two versts, arrived at a spot whence there branched off a + by-road. Yet two, three, or four versts of the by-road had been covered + before they saw the least sign of a two-storied stone mansion. Then it was + that Chichikov suddenly recollected that, when a friend has invited one to + visit his country house, and has said that the distance thereto is fifteen + versts, the distance is sure to turn out to be at least thirty. + </p> + <p> + Not many people would have admired the situation of Manilov’s abode, for + it stood on an isolated rise and was open to every wind that blew. On the + slope of the rise lay closely-mown turf, while, disposed here and there, + after the English fashion, were flower-beds containing clumps of lilac and + yellow acacia. Also, there were a few insignificant groups of + slender-leaved, pointed-tipped birch trees, with, under two of the latter, + an arbour having a shabby green cupola, some blue-painted wooden supports, + and the inscription “This is the Temple of Solitary Thought.” Lower down + the slope lay a green-coated pond—green-coated ponds constitute a + frequent spectacle in the gardens of Russian landowners; and, lastly, from + the foot of the declivity there stretched a line of mouldy, log-built huts + which, for some obscure reason or another, our hero set himself to count. + Up to two hundred or more did he count, but nowhere could he perceive a + single leaf of vegetation or a single stick of timber. The only thing to + greet the eye was the logs of which the huts were constructed. + Nevertheless the scene was to a certain extent enlivened by the spectacle + of two peasant women who, with clothes picturesquely tucked up, were + wading knee-deep in the pond and dragging behind them, with wooden + handles, a ragged fishing-net, in the meshes of which two crawfish and a + roach with glistening scales were entangled. The women appeared to have + cause of dispute between themselves—to be rating one another about + something. In the background, and to one side of the house, showed a + faint, dusky blur of pinewood, and even the weather was in keeping with + the surroundings, since the day was neither clear nor dull, but of the + grey tint which may be noted in uniforms of garrison soldiers which have + seen long service. To complete the picture, a cock, the recognised + harbinger of atmospheric mutations, was present; and, in spite of the fact + that a certain connection with affairs of gallantry had led to his having + had his head pecked bare by other cocks, he flapped a pair of wings—appendages + as bare as two pieces of bast—and crowed loudly. + </p> + <p> + As Chichikov approached the courtyard of the mansion he caught sight of + his host (clad in a green frock coat) standing on the verandah and + pressing one hand to his eyes to shield them from the sun and so get a + better view of the approaching carriage. In proportion as the britchka + drew nearer and nearer to the verandah, the host’s eyes assumed a more and + more delighted expression, and his smile a broader and broader sweep. + </p> + <p> + “Paul Ivanovitch!” he exclaimed when at length Chichikov leapt from the + vehicle. “Never should I have believed that you would have remembered us!” + </p> + <p> + The two friends exchanged hearty embraces, and Manilov then conducted his + guest to the drawing-room. During the brief time that they are traversing + the hall, the anteroom, and the dining-room, let me try to say something + concerning the master of the house. But such an undertaking bristles with + difficulties—it promises to be a far less easy task than the + depicting of some outstanding personality which calls but for a wholesale + dashing of colours upon the canvas—the colours of a pair of dark, + burning eyes, a pair of dark, beetling brows, a forehead seamed with + wrinkles, a black, or a fiery-red, cloak thrown backwards over the + shoulder, and so forth, and so forth. Yet, so numerous are Russian serf + owners that, though careful scrutiny reveals to one’s sight a quantity of + outre peculiarities, they are, as a class, exceedingly difficult to + portray, and one needs to strain one’s faculties to the utmost before it + becomes possible to pick out their variously subtle, their almost + invisible, features. In short, one needs, before doing this, to carry out + a prolonged probing with the aid of an insight sharpened in the acute + school of research. + </p> + <p> + Only God can say what Manilov’s real character was. A class of men exists + whom the proverb has described as “men unto themselves, neither this nor + that—neither Bogdan of the city nor Selifan of the village.” And to + that class we had better assign also Manilov. Outwardly he was presentable + enough, for his features were not wanting in amiability, but that + amiability was a quality into which there entered too much of the sugary + element, so that his every gesture, his every attitude, seemed to connote + an excess of eagerness to curry favour and cultivate a closer + acquaintance. On first speaking to the man, his ingratiating smile, his + flaxen hair, and his blue eyes would lead one to say, “What a pleasant, + good-tempered fellow he seems!” yet during the next moment or two one + would feel inclined to say nothing at all, and, during the third moment, + only to say, “The devil alone knows what he is!” And should, thereafter, + one not hasten to depart, one would inevitably become overpowered with the + deadly sense of ennui which comes of the intuition that nothing in the + least interesting is to be looked for, but only a series of wearisome + utterances of the kind which are apt to fall from the lips of a man whose + hobby has once been touched upon. For every man HAS his hobby. One man’s + may be sporting dogs; another man’s may be that of believing himself to be + a lover of music, and able to sound the art to its inmost depths; + another’s may be that of posing as a connoisseur of recherche cookery; + another’s may be that of aspiring to play roles of a kind higher than + nature has assigned him; another’s (though this is a more limited + ambition) may be that of getting drunk, and of dreaming that he is + edifying both his friends, his acquaintances, and people with whom he has + no connection at all by walking arm-in-arm with an Imperial aide-de-camp; + another’s may be that of possessing a hand able to chip corners off aces + and deuces of diamonds; another’s may be that of yearning to set things + straight—in other words, to approximate his personality to that of a + stationmaster or a director of posts. In short, almost every man has his + hobby or his leaning; yet Manilov had none such, for at home he spoke + little, and spent the greater part of his time in meditation—though + God only knows what that meditation comprised! Nor can it be said that he + took much interest in the management of his estate, for he never rode into + the country, and the estate practically managed itself. Whenever the + bailiff said to him, “It might be well to have such-and-such a thing + done,” he would reply, “Yes, that is not a bad idea,” and then go on + smoking his pipe—a habit which he had acquired during his service in + the army, where he had been looked upon as an officer of modesty, + delicacy, and refinement. “Yes, it is NOT a bad idea,” he would repeat. + Again, whenever a peasant approached him and, rubbing the back of his + neck, said “Barin, may I have leave to go and work for myself, in order + that I may earn my obrok <a href="#linknote-9" id="linknoteref-9"><small>9</small></a>?” he would snap out, with pipe in + mouth as usual, “Yes, go!” and never trouble his head as to whether the + peasant’s real object might not be to go and get drunk. True, at intervals + he would say, while gazing from the verandah to the courtyard, and from + the courtyard to the pond, that it would be indeed splendid if a carriage + drive could suddenly materialise, and the pond as suddenly become spanned + with a stone bridge, and little shops as suddenly arise whence pedlars + could dispense the petty merchandise of the kind which peasantry most + need. And at such moments his eyes would grow winning, and his features + assume an expression of intense satisfaction. Yet never did these projects + pass beyond the stage of debate. Likewise there lay in his study a book + with the fourteenth page permanently turned down. It was a book which he + had been reading for the past two years! In general, something seemed to + be wanting in the establishment. For instance, although the drawing-room + was filled with beautiful furniture, and upholstered in some fine silken + material which clearly had cost no inconsiderable sum, two of the chairs + lacked any covering but bast, and for some years past the master had been + accustomed to warn his guests with the words, “Do not sit upon these + chairs; they are not yet ready for use.” Another room contained no + furniture at all, although, a few days after the marriage, it had been + said: “My dear, to-morrow let us set about procuring at least some + TEMPORARY furniture for this room.” Also, every evening would see placed + upon the drawing-room table a fine bronze candelabrum, a statuette + representative of the Three Graces, a tray inlaid with mother-of-pearl, + and a rickety, lop-sided copper invalide. Yet of the fact that all four + articles were thickly coated with grease neither the master of the house + nor the mistress nor the servants seemed to entertain the least suspicion. + At the same time, Manilov and his wife were quite satisfied with each + other. More than eight years had elapsed since their marriage, yet one of + them was for ever offering his or her partner a piece of apple or a bonbon + or a nut, while murmuring some tender something which voiced a + whole-hearted affection. “Open your mouth, dearest”—thus ran the + formula—“and let me pop into it this titbit.” You may be sure that + on such occasions the “dearest mouth” parted its lips most graciously! For + their mutual birthdays the pair always contrived some “surprise present” + in the shape of a glass receptacle for tooth-powder, or what not; and as + they sat together on the sofa he would suddenly, and for some unknown + reason, lay aside his pipe, and she her work (if at the moment she + happened to be holding it in her hands) and husband and wife would imprint + upon one another’s cheeks such a prolonged and languishing kiss that + during its continuance you could have smoked a small cigar. In short, they + were what is known as “a very happy couple.” Yet it may be remarked that a + household requires other pursuits to be engaged in than lengthy embracings + and the preparing of cunning “surprises.” Yes, many a function calls for + fulfilment. For instance, why should it be thought foolish or low to + superintend the kitchen? Why should care not be taken that the storeroom + never lacks supplies? Why should a housekeeper be allowed to thieve? Why + should slovenly and drunken servants exist? Why should a domestic staff be + suffered in indulge in bouts of unconscionable debauchery during its + leisure time? Yet none of these things were thought worthy of + consideration by Manilov’s wife, for she had been gently brought up, and + gentle nurture, as we all know, is to be acquired only in boarding + schools, and boarding schools, as we know, hold the three principal + subjects which constitute the basis of human virtue to be the French + language (a thing indispensable to the happiness of married life), + piano-playing (a thing wherewith to beguile a husband’s leisure moments), + and that particular department of housewifery which is comprised in the + knitting of purses and other “surprises.” Nevertheless changes and + improvements have begun to take place, since things now are governed more + by the personal inclinations and idiosyncracies of the keepers of such + establishments. For instance, in some seminaries the regimen places + piano-playing first, and the French language second, and then the above + department of housewifery; while in other seminaries the knitting of + “surprises” heads the list, and then the French language, and then the + playing of pianos—so diverse are the systems in force! None the + less, I may remark that Madame Manilov— + </p> + <p> + But let me confess that I always shrink from saying too much about ladies. + Moreover, it is time that we returned to our heroes, who, during the past + few minutes, have been standing in front of the drawing-room door, and + engaged in urging one another to enter first. + </p> + <p> + “Pray be so good as not to inconvenience yourself on my account,” said + Chichikov. “<i>I</i> will follow YOU.” + </p> + <p> + “No, Paul Ivanovitch—no! You are my guest.” And Manilov pointed + towards the doorway. + </p> + <p> + “Make no difficulty about it, I pray,” urged Chichikov. “I beg of you to + make no difficulty about it, but to pass into the room.” + </p> + <p> + “Pardon me, I will not. Never could I allow so distinguished and so + welcome a guest as yourself to take second place.” + </p> + <p> + “Why call me ‘distinguished,’ my dear sir? I beg of you to proceed.” + </p> + <p> + “Nay; be YOU pleased to do so.” + </p> + <p> + “And why?” + </p> + <p> + “For the reason which I have stated.” And Manilov smiled his very + pleasantest smile. + </p> + <p> + Finally the pair entered simultaneously and sideways; with the result that + they jostled one another not a little in the process. + </p> + <p> + “Allow me to present to you my wife,” continued Manilov. “My dear—Paul + Ivanovitch.” + </p> + <p> + Upon that Chichikov caught sight of a lady whom hitherto he had + overlooked, but who, with Manilov, was now bowing to him in the doorway. + Not wholly of unpleasing exterior, she was dressed in a well-fitting, + high-necked morning dress of pale-coloured silk; and as the visitor + entered the room her small white hands threw something upon the table and + clutched her embroidered skirt before rising from the sofa where she had + been seated. Not without a sense of pleasure did Chichikov take her hand + as, lisping a little, she declared that she and her husband were equally + gratified by his coming, and that, of late, not a day had passed without + her husband recalling him to mind. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” affirmed Manilov; “and every day SHE has said to ME: ‘Why does not + your friend put in an appearance?’ ‘Wait a little dearest,’ I have always + replied. ‘’Twill not be long now before he comes.’ And you HAVE come, you + HAVE honoured us with a visit, you HAVE bestowed upon us a treat—a + treat destined to convert this day into a gala day, a true birthday of the + heart.” + </p> + <p> + The intimation that matters had reached the point of the occasion being + destined to constitute a “true birthday of the heart” caused Chichikov to + become a little confused; wherefore he made modest reply that, as a matter + of fact, he was neither of distinguished origin nor distinguished rank. + </p> + <p> + “Ah, you ARE so,” interrupted Manilov with his fixed and engaging smile. + “You are all that, and more.” + </p> + <p> + “How like you our town?” queried Madame. “Have you spent an agreeable time + in it?” + </p> + <p> + “Very,” replied Chichikov. “The town is an exceedingly nice one, and I + have greatly enjoyed its hospitable society.” + </p> + <p> + “And what do you think of our Governor?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes; IS he not a most engaging and dignified personage?” added Manilov. + </p> + <p> + “He is all that,” assented Chichikov. “Indeed, he is a man worthy of the + greatest respect. And how thoroughly he performs his duty according to his + lights! Would that we had more like him!” + </p> + <p> + “And the tactfulness with which he greets every one!” added Manilov, + smiling, and half-closing his eyes, like a cat which is being tickled + behind the ears. + </p> + <p> + “Quite so,” assented Chichikov. “He is a man of the most eminent civility + and approachableness. And what an artist! Never should I have thought he + could have worked the marvellous household samplers which he has done! + Some specimens of his needlework which he showed me could not well have + been surpassed by any lady in the land!” + </p> + <p> + “And the Vice-Governor, too—he is a nice man, is he not?” inquired + Manilov with renewed blinkings of the eyes. + </p> + <p> + “Who? The Vice-Governor? Yes, a most worthy fellow!” replied Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “And what of the Chief of Police? Is it not a fact that he too is in the + highest degree agreeable?” + </p> + <p> + “Very agreeable indeed. And what a clever, well-read individual! With him + and the Public Prosecutor and the President of the Local Council I played + whist until the cocks uttered their last morning crow. He is a most + excellent fellow.” + </p> + <p> + “And what of his wife?” queried Madame Manilov. “Is she not a most + gracious personality?” + </p> + <p> + “One of the best among my limited acquaintance,” agreed Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + Nor were the President of the Local Council and the Postmaster overlooked; + until the company had run through the whole list of urban officials. And + in every case those officials appeared to be persons of the highest + possible merit. + </p> + <p> + “Do you devote your time entirely to your estate?” asked Chichikov, in his + turn. + </p> + <p> + “Well, most of it,” replied Manilov; “though also we pay occasional visits + to the town, in order that we may mingle with a little well-bred society. + One grows a trifle rusty if one lives for ever in retirement.” + </p> + <p> + “Quite so,” agreed Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, quite so,” capped Manilov. “At the same time, it would be a + different matter if the neighbourhood were a GOOD one—if, for + example, one had a friend with whom one could discuss manners and polite + deportment, or engage in some branch of science, and so stimulate one’s + wits. For that sort of thing gives one’s intellect an airing. It, it—” + At a loss for further words, he ended by remarking that his feelings were + apt to carry him away; after which he continued with a gesture: “What I + mean is that, were that sort of thing possible, I, for one, could find the + country and an isolated life possessed of great attractions. But, as + matters stand, such a thing is NOT possible. All that I can manage to do + is, occasionally, to read a little of A Son of the Fatherland.” + </p> + <p> + With these sentiments Chichikov expressed entire agreement: adding that + nothing could be more delightful than to lead a solitary life in which + there should be comprised only the sweet contemplation of nature and the + intermittent perusal of a book. + </p> + <p> + “Nay, but even THAT were worth nothing had not one a friend with whom to + share one’s life,” remarked Manilov. + </p> + <p> + “True, true,” agreed Chichikov. “Without a friend, what are all the + treasures in the world? ‘Possess not money,’ a wise man has said, ‘but + rather good friends to whom to turn in case of need.’” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, Paul Ivanovitch,” said Manilov with a glance not merely sweet, but + positively luscious—a glance akin to the mixture which even clever + physicians have to render palatable before they can induce a hesitant + patient to take it. “Consequently you may imagine what happiness—what + PERFECT happiness, so to speak—the present occasion has brought me, + seeing that I am permitted to converse with you and to enjoy your + conversation.” + </p> + <p> + “But WHAT of my conversation?” replied Chichikov. “I am an insignificant + individual, and, beyond that, nothing.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, Paul Ivanovitch!” cried the other. “Permit me to be frank, and to say + that I would give half my property to possess even a PORTION of the + talents which you possess.” + </p> + <p> + “On the contrary, I should consider it the highest honour in the world if—” + </p> + <p> + The lengths to which this mutual outpouring of soul would have proceeded + had not a servant entered to announce luncheon must remain a mystery. + </p> + <p> + “I humbly invite you to join us at table,” said Manilov. “Also, you will + pardon us for the fact that we cannot provide a banquet such as is to be + obtained in our metropolitan cities? We partake of simple fare, according + to Russian custom—we confine ourselves to shtchi <a + href="#linknote-10" id="linknoteref-10"><small>10</small></a>, + but we do so with a single heart. Come, I humbly beg of you.” + </p> + <p> + After another contest for the honour of yielding precedence, Chichikov + succeeded in making his way (in zigzag fashion) to the dining-room, where + they found awaiting them a couple of youngsters. These were Manilov’s + sons, and boys of the age which admits of their presence at table, but + necessitates the continued use of high chairs. Beside them was their + tutor, who bowed politely and smiled; after which the hostess took her + seat before her soup plate, and the guest of honour found himself esconsed + between her and the master of the house, while the servant tied up the + boys’ necks in bibs. + </p> + <p> + “What charming children!” said Chichikov as he gazed at the pair. “And how + old are they?” + </p> + <p> + “The eldest is eight,” replied Manilov, “and the younger one attained the + age of six yesterday.” + </p> + <p> + “Themistocleus,” went on the father, turning to his first-born, who was + engaged in striving to free his chin from the bib with which the footman + had encircled it. On hearing this distinctly Greek name (to which, for + some unknown reason, Manilov always appended the termination “eus”), + Chichikov raised his eyebrows a little, but hastened, the next moment, to + restore his face to a more befitting expression. + </p> + <p> + “Themistocleus,” repeated the father, “tell me which is the finest city in + France.” + </p> + <p> + Upon this the tutor concentrated his attention upon Themistocleus, and + appeared to be trying hard to catch his eye. Only when Themistocleus had + muttered “Paris” did the preceptor grow calmer, and nod his head. + </p> + <p> + “And which is the finest city in Russia?” continued Manilov. + </p> + <p> + Again the tutor’s attitude became wholly one of concentration. + </p> + <p> + “St. Petersburg,” replied Themistocleus. + </p> + <p> + “And what other city?” + </p> + <p> + “Moscow,” responded the boy. + </p> + <p> + “Clever little dear!” burst out Chichikov, turning with an air of surprise + to the father. “Indeed, I feel bound to say that the child evinces the + greatest possible potentialities.” + </p> + <p> + “You do not know him fully,” replied the delighted Manilov. “The amount of + sharpness which he possesses is extraordinary. Our younger one, Alkid, is + not so quick; whereas his brother—well, no matter what he may happen + upon (whether upon a cowbug or upon a water-beetle or upon anything else), + his little eyes begin jumping out of his head, and he runs to catch the + thing, and to inspect it. For HIM I am reserving a diplomatic post. + Themistocleus,” added the father, again turning to his son, “do you wish + to become an ambassador?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I do,” replied Themistocleus, chewing a piece of bread and wagging + his head from side to side. + </p> + <p> + At this moment the lacquey who had been standing behind the future + ambassador wiped the latter’s nose; and well it was that he did so, since + otherwise an inelegant and superfluous drop would have been added to the + soup. After that the conversation turned upon the joys of a quiet life—though + occasionally it was interrupted by remarks from the hostess on the subject + of acting and actors. Meanwhile the tutor kept his eyes fixed upon the + speakers’ faces; and whenever he noticed that they were on the point of + laughing he at once opened his mouth, and laughed with enthusiasm. + Probably he was a man of grateful heart who wished to repay his employers + for the good treatment which he had received. Once, however, his features + assumed a look of grimness as, fixing his eyes upon his vis-a-vis, the + boys, he tapped sternly upon the table. This happened at a juncture when + Themistocleus had bitten Alkid on the ear, and the said Alkid, with + frowning eyes and open mouth, was preparing himself to sob in piteous + fashion; until, recognising that for such a proceeding he might possibly + be deprived of his plate, he hastened to restore his mouth to its original + expression, and fell tearfully to gnawing a mutton bone—the grease + from which had soon covered his cheeks. + </p> + <p> + Every now and again the hostess would turn to Chichikov with the words, + “You are eating nothing—you have indeed taken little;” but + invariably her guest replied: “Thank you, I have had more than enough. A + pleasant conversation is worth all the dishes in the world.” + </p> + <p> + At length the company rose from table. Manilov was in high spirits, and, + laying his hand upon his guest’s shoulder, was on the point of conducting + him to the drawing-room, when suddenly Chichikov intimated to him, with a + meaning look, that he wished to speak to him on a very important matter. + </p> + <p> + “That being so,” said Manilov, “allow me to invite you into my study.” And + he led the way to a small room which faced the blue of the forest. “This + is my sanctum,” he added. + </p> + <p> + “What a pleasant apartment!” remarked Chichikov as he eyed it carefully. + And, indeed, the room did not lack a certain attractiveness. The walls + were painted a sort of blueish-grey colour, and the furniture consisted of + four chairs, a settee, and a table—the latter of which bore a few + sheets of writing-paper and the book of which I have before had occasion + to speak. But the most prominent feature of the room was tobacco, which + appeared in many different guises—in packets, in a tobacco jar, and + in a loose heap strewn about the table. Likewise, both window sills were + studded with little heaps of ash, arranged, not without artifice, in rows + of more or less tidiness. Clearly smoking afforded the master of the house + a frequent means of passing the time. + </p> + <p> + “Permit me to offer you a seat on this settee,” said Manilov. “Here you + will be quieter than you would be in the drawing-room.” + </p> + <p> + “But I should prefer to sit upon this chair.” + </p> + <p> + “I cannot allow that,” objected the smiling Manilov. “The settee is + specially reserved for my guests. Whether you choose or no, upon it you + MUST sit.” + </p> + <p> + Accordingly Chichikov obeyed. + </p> + <p> + “And also let me hand you a pipe.” + </p> + <p> + “No, I never smoke,” answered Chichikov civilly, and with an assumed air + of regret. + </p> + <p> + “And why?” inquired Manilov—equally civilly, but with a regret that + was wholly genuine. + </p> + <p> + “Because I fear that I have never quite formed the habit, owing to my + having heard that a pipe exercises a desiccating effect upon the system.” + </p> + <p> + “Then allow me to tell you that that is mere prejudice. Nay, I would even + go so far as to say that to smoke a pipe is a healthier practice than to + take snuff. Among its members our regiment numbered a lieutenant—a + most excellent, well-educated fellow—who was simply INCAPABLE of + removing his pipe from his mouth, whether at table or (pardon me) in other + places. He is now forty, yet no man could enjoy better health than he has + always done.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov replied that such cases were common, since nature comprised many + things which even the finest intellect could not compass. + </p> + <p> + “But allow me to put to you a question,” he went on in a tone in which + there was a strange—or, at all events, RATHER a strange—note. + For some unknown reason, also, he glanced over his shoulder. For some + equally unknown reason, Manilov glanced over HIS. + </p> + <p> + “How long is it,” inquired the guest, “since you last rendered a census + return?” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, a long, long time. In fact, I cannot remember when it was.” + </p> + <p> + “And since then have many of your serfs died?” + </p> + <p> + “I do not know. To ascertain that I should need to ask my bailiff. + Footman, go and call the bailiff. I think he will be at home to-day.” + </p> + <p> + Before long the bailiff made his appearance. He was a man of under forty, + clean-shaven, clad in a smock, and evidently used to a quiet life, seeing + that his face was of that puffy fullness, and the skin encircling his + slit-like eyes was of that sallow tint, which shows that the owner of + those features is well acquainted with a feather bed. In a trice it could + be seen that he had played his part in life as all such bailiffs do—that, + originally a young serf of elementary education, he had married some + Agashka of a housekeeper or a mistress’s favourite, and then himself + become housekeeper, and, subsequently, bailiff; after which he had + proceeded according to the rules of his tribe—that is to say, he had + consorted with and stood in with the more well-to-do serfs on the estate, + and added the poorer ones to the list of forced payers of obrok, while + himself leaving his bed at nine o’clock in the morning, and, when the + samovar had been brought, drinking his tea at leisure. + </p> + <p> + “Look here, my good man,” said Manilov. “How many of our serfs have died + since the last census revision?” + </p> + <p> + “How many of them have died? Why, a great many.” The bailiff hiccoughed, + and slapped his mouth lightly after doing so. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I imagined that to be the case,” corroborated Manilov. “In fact, a + VERY great many serfs have died.” He turned to Chichikov and repeated the + words. + </p> + <p> + “How many, for instance?” asked Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Yes; how many?” re-echoed Manilov. + </p> + <p> + “HOW many?” re-echoed the bailiff. “Well, no one knows the exact number, + for no one has kept any account.” + </p> + <p> + “Quite so,” remarked Manilov. “I supposed the death-rate to have been + high, but was ignorant of its precise extent.” + </p> + <p> + “Then would you be so good as to have it computed for me?” said Chichikov. + “And also to have a detailed list of the deaths made out?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I will—a detailed list,” agreed Manilov. + </p> + <p> + “Very well.” + </p> + <p> + The bailiff departed. + </p> + <p> + “For what purpose do you want it?” inquired Manilov when the bailiff had + gone. + </p> + <p> + The question seemed to embarrass the guest, for in Chichikov’s face there + dawned a sort of tense expression, and it reddened as though its owner + were striving to express something not easy to put into words. True + enough, Manilov was now destined to hear such strange and unexpected + things as never before had greeted human ears. + </p> + <p> + “You ask me,” said Chichikov, “for what purpose I want the list. Well, my + purpose in wanting it is this—that I desire to purchase a few + peasants.” And he broke off in a gulp. + </p> + <p> + “But may I ask HOW you desire to purchase those peasants?” asked Manilov. + “With land, or merely as souls for transferment—that is to say, by + themselves, and without any land?” + </p> + <p> + “I want the peasants themselves only,” replied Chichikov. “And I want dead + ones at that.” + </p> + <p> + “What?—Excuse me, but I am a trifle deaf. Really, your words sound + most strange!” + </p> + <p> + “All that I am proposing to do,” replied Chichikov, “is to purchase the + dead peasants who, at the last census, were returned by you as alive.” + </p> + <p> + Manilov dropped his pipe on the floor, and sat gaping. Yes, the two + friends who had just been discussing the joys of camaraderie sat staring + at one another like the portraits which, of old, used to hang on opposite + sides of a mirror. At length Manilov picked up his pipe, and, while doing + so, glanced covertly at Chichikov to see whether there was any trace of a + smile to be detected on his lips—whether, in short, he was joking. + But nothing of the sort could be discerned. On the contrary, Chichikov’s + face looked graver than usual. Next, Manilov wondered whether, for some + unknown reason, his guest had lost his wits; wherefore he spent some time + in gazing at him with anxious intentness. But the guest’s eyes seemed + clear—they contained no spark of the wild, restless fire which is + apt to wander in the eyes of madmen. All was as it should be. + Consequently, in spite of Manilov’s cogitations, he could think of nothing + better to do than to sit letting a stream of tobacco smoke escape from his + mouth. + </p> + <p> + “So,” continued Chichikov, “what I desire to know is whether you are + willing to hand over to me—to resign—these actually + non-living, but legally living, peasants; or whether you have any better + proposal to make?” + </p> + <p> + Manilov felt too confused and confounded to do aught but continue staring + at his interlocutor. + </p> + <p> + “I think that you are disturbing yourself unnecessarily,” was Chichikov’s + next remark. + </p> + <p> + “I? Oh no! Not at all!” stammered Manilov. “Only—pardon me—I + do not quite comprehend you. You see, never has it fallen to my lot to + acquire the brilliant polish which is, so to speak, manifest in your every + movement. Nor have I ever been able to attain the art of expressing myself + well. Consequently, although there is a possibility that in the—er—utterances + which have just fallen from your lips there may lie something else + concealed, it may equally be that—er—you have been pleased so + to express yourself for the sake of the beauty of the terms wherein that + expression found shape?” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, no,” asserted Chichikov. “I mean what I say and no more. My reference + to such of your pleasant souls as are dead was intended to be taken + literally.” + </p> + <p> + Manilov still felt at a loss—though he was conscious that he MUST do + something, he MUST propound some question. But what question? The devil + alone knew! In the end he merely expelled some more tobacco smoke—this + time from his nostrils as well as from his mouth. + </p> + <p> + “So,” went on Chichikov, “if no obstacle stands in the way, we might as + well proceed to the completion of the purchase.” + </p> + <p> + “What? Of the purchase of the dead souls?” + </p> + <p> + “Of the ‘dead’ souls? Oh dear no! Let us write them down as LIVING ones, + seeing that that is how they figure in the census returns. Never do I + permit myself to step outside the civil law, great though has been the + harm which that rule has wrought me in my career. In my eyes an obligation + is a sacred thing. In the presence of the law I am dumb.” + </p> + <p> + These last words reassured Manilov not a little: yet still the meaning of + the affair remained to him a mystery. By way of answer, he fell to sucking + at his pipe with such vehemence that at length the pipe began to gurgle + like a bassoon. It was as though he had been seeking of it inspiration in + the present unheard-of juncture. But the pipe only gurgled, et praeterea + nihil. + </p> + <p> + “Perhaps you feel doubtful about the proposal?” said Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Not at all,” replied Manilov. “But you will, I know, excuse me if I say + (and I say it out of no spirit of prejudice, nor yet as criticising + yourself in any way)—you will, I know, excuse me if I say that + possibly this—er—this, er, SCHEME of yours, this—er—TRANSACTION + of yours, may fail altogether to accord with the Civil Statutes and + Provisions of the Realm?” + </p> + <p> + And Manilov, with a slight gesture of the head, looked meaningly into + Chichikov’s face, while displaying in his every feature, including his + closely-compressed lips, such an expression of profundity as never before + was seen on any human countenance—unless on that of some + particularly sapient Minister of State who is debating some particularly + abstruse problem. + </p> + <p> + Nevertheless Chichikov rejoined that the kind of scheme or transaction + which he had adumbrated in no way clashed with the Civil Statutes and + Provisions of Russia; to which he added that the Treasury would even + BENEFIT by the enterprise, seeing it would draw therefrom the usual legal + percentage. + </p> + <p> + “What, then, do you propose?” asked Manilov. + </p> + <p> + “I propose only what is above-board, and nothing else.” + </p> + <p> + “Then, that being so, it is another matter, and I have nothing to urge + against it,” said Manilov, apparently reassured to the full. + </p> + <p> + “Very well,” remarked Chichikov. “Then we need only to agree as to the + price.” + </p> + <p> + “As to the price?” began Manilov, and then stopped. Presently he went on: + “Surely you cannot suppose me capable of taking money for souls which, in + one sense at least, have completed their existence? Seeing that this + fantastic whim of yours (if I may so call it?) has seized upon you to the + extent that it has, I, on my side, shall be ready to surrender to you + those souls UNCONDITIONALLY, and to charge myself with the whole expenses + of the sale.” + </p> + <p> + I should be greatly to blame if I were to omit that, as soon as Manilov + had pronounced these words, the face of his guest became replete with + satisfaction. Indeed, grave and prudent a man though Chichikov was, he had + much ado to refrain from executing a leap that would have done credit to a + goat (an animal which, as we all know, finds itself moved to such + exertions only during moments of the most ecstatic joy). Nevertheless the + guest did at least execute such a convulsive shuffle that the material + with which the cushions of the chair were covered came apart, and Manilov + gazed at him with some misgiving. Finally Chichikov’s gratitude led him to + plunge into a stream of acknowledgement of a vehemence which caused his + host to grow confused, to blush, to shake his head in deprecation, and to + end by declaring that the concession was nothing, and that, his one desire + being to manifest the dictates of his heart and the psychic magnetism + which his friend exercised, he, in short, looked upon the dead souls as so + much worthless rubbish. + </p> + <p> + “Not at all,” replied Chichikov, pressing his hand; after which he heaved + a profound sigh. Indeed, he seemed in the right mood for outpourings of + the heart, for he continued—not without a ring of emotion in his + tone: “If you but knew the service which you have rendered to an + apparently insignificant individual who is devoid both of family and + kindred! For what have I not suffered in my time—I, a drifting + barque amid the tempestuous billows of life? What harryings, what + persecutions, have I not known? Of what grief have I not tasted? And why? + Simply because I have ever kept the truth in view, because ever I have + preserved inviolate an unsullied conscience, because ever I have stretched + out a helping hand to the defenceless widow and the hapless orphan!” After + which outpouring Chichikov pulled out his handkerchief, and wiped away a + brimming tear. + </p> + <p> + Manilov’s heart was moved to the core. Again and again did the two friends + press one another’s hands in silence as they gazed into one another’s + tear-filled eyes. Indeed, Manilov COULD not let go our hero’s hand, but + clasped it with such warmth that the hero in question began to feel + himself at a loss how best to wrench it free: until, quietly withdrawing + it, he observed that to have the purchase completed as speedily as + possible would not be a bad thing; wherefore he himself would at once + return to the town to arrange matters. Taking up his hat, therefore, he + rose to make his adieus. + </p> + <p> + “What? Are you departing already?” said Manilov, suddenly recovering + himself, and experiencing a sense of misgiving. At that moment his wife + sailed into the room. + </p> + <p> + “Is Paul Ivanovitch leaving us so soon, dearest Lizanka?” she said with an + air of regret. + </p> + <p> + “Yes. Surely it must be that we have wearied him?” her spouse replied. + </p> + <p> + “By no means,” asserted Chichikov, pressing his hand to his heart. “In + this breast, madam, will abide for ever the pleasant memory of the time + which I have spent with you. Believe me, I could conceive of no greater + blessing than to reside, if not under the same roof as yourselves, at all + events in your immediate neighbourhood.” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed?” exclaimed Manilov, greatly pleased with the idea. “How splendid + it would be if you DID come to reside under our roof, so that we could + recline under an elm tree together, and talk philosophy, and delve to the + very root of things!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, it WOULD be a paradisaical existence!” agreed Chichikov with a sigh. + Nevertheless he shook hands with Madame. “Farewell, sudarina,” he said. + “And farewell to YOU, my esteemed host. Do not forget what I have + requested you to do.” + </p> + <p> + “Rest assured that I will not,” responded Manilov. “Only for a couple of + days will you and I be parted from one another.” + </p> + <p> + With that the party moved into the drawing-room. + </p> + <p> + “Farewell, dearest children,” Chichikov went on as he caught sight of + Alkid and Themistocleus, who were playing with a wooden hussar which + lacked both a nose and one arm. “Farewell, dearest pets. Pardon me for + having brought you no presents, but, to tell you the truth, I was not, + until my visit, aware of your existence. However, now that I shall be + coming again, I will not fail to bring you gifts. Themistocleus, to you I + will bring a sword. You would like that, would you not?” + </p> + <p> + “I should,” replied Themistocleus. + </p> + <p> + “And to you, Alkid, I will bring a drum. That would suit you, would it + not?” And he bowed in Alkid’s direction. + </p> + <p> + “Zeth—a drum,” lisped the boy, hanging his head. + </p> + <p> + “Good! Then a drum it shall be—SUCH a beautiful drum! What a + tur-r-r-ru-ing and a tra-ta-ta-ta-ing you will be able to kick up! + Farewell, my darling.” And, kissing the boy’s head, he turned to Manilov + and Madame with the slight smile which one assumes before assuring parents + of the guileless merits of their offspring. + </p> + <p> + “But you had better stay, Paul Ivanovitch,” said the father as the trio + stepped out on to the verandah. “See how the clouds are gathering!” + </p> + <p> + “They are only small ones,” replied Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “And you know your way to Sobakevitch’s?” + </p> + <p> + “No, I do not, and should be glad if you would direct me.” + </p> + <p> + “If you like I will tell your coachman.” And in very civil fashion Manilov + did so, even going so far as to address the man in the second person + plural. On hearing that he was to pass two turnings, and then to take a + third, Selifan remarked, “We shall get there all right, sir,” and + Chichikov departed amid a profound salvo of salutations and wavings of + handkerchiefs on the part of his host and hostess, who raised themselves + on tiptoe in their enthusiasm. + </p> + <p> + For a long while Manilov stood following the departing britchka with his + eyes. In fact, he continued to smoke his pipe and gaze after the vehicle + even when it had become lost to view. Then he re-entered the drawing-room, + seated himself upon a chair, and surrendered his mind to the thought that + he had shown his guest most excellent entertainment. Next, his mind passed + imperceptibly to other matters, until at last it lost itself God only + knows where. He thought of the amenities of a life, of friendship, and of + how nice it would be to live with a comrade on, say, the bank of some + river, and to span the river with a bridge of his own, and to build an + enormous mansion with a facade lofty enough even to afford a view to + Moscow. On that facade he and his wife and friend would drink afternoon + tea in the open air, and discuss interesting subjects; after which, in a + fine carriage, they would drive to some reunion or other, where with their + pleasant manners they would so charm the company that the Imperial + Government, on learning of their merits, would raise the pair to the grade + of General or God knows what—that is to say, to heights whereof even + Manilov himself could form no idea. Then suddenly Chichikov’s + extraordinary request interrupted the dreamer’s reflections, and he found + his brain powerless to digest it, seeing that, turn and turn the matter + about as he might, he could not properly explain its bearing. Smoking his + pipe, he sat where he was until supper time. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0003"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER III + </h3> + <p> + Meanwhile, Chichikov, seated in his britchka and bowling along the + turnpike, was feeling greatly pleased with himself. From the preceding + chapter the reader will have gathered the principal subject of his bent + and inclinations: wherefore it is no matter for wonder that his body and + his soul had ended by becoming wholly immersed therein. To all appearances + the thoughts, the calculations, and the projects which were now reflected + in his face partook of a pleasant nature, since momentarily they kept + leaving behind them a satisfied smile. Indeed, so engrossed was he that he + never noticed that his coachman, elated with the hospitality of Manilov’s + domestics, was making remarks of a didactic nature to the off horse of the + troika <a href="#linknote-11" id="linknoteref-11"><small>11</small></a>, + a skewbald. This skewbald was a knowing animal, and made only a show of + pulling; whereas its comrades, the middle horse (a bay, and known as the + Assessor, owing to his having been acquired from a gentleman of that rank) + and the near horse (a roan), would do their work gallantly, and even + evince in their eyes the pleasure which they derived from their exertions. + </p> + <p> + “Ah, you rascal, you rascal! I’ll get the better of you!” ejaculated + Selifan as he sat up and gave the lazy one a cut with his whip. “YOU know + your business all right, you German pantaloon! The bay is a good fellow, + and does his duty, and I will give him a bit over his feed, for he is a + horse to be respected; and the Assessor too is a good horse. But what are + YOU shaking your ears for? You are a fool, so just mind when you’re spoken + to. ’Tis good advice I’m giving you, you blockhead. Ah! You CAN travel + when you like.” And he gave the animal another cut, and then shouted to + the trio, “Gee up, my beauties!” and drew his whip gently across the backs + of the skewbald’s comrades—not as a punishment, but as a sign of his + approval. That done, he addressed himself to the skewbald again. + </p> + <p> + “Do you think,” he cried, “that I don’t see what you are doing? You can + behave quite decently when you like, and make a man respect you.” + </p> + <p> + With that he fell to recalling certain reminiscences. + </p> + <p> + “They were NICE folk, those folk at the gentleman’s yonder,” he mused. “I + DO love a chat with a man when he is a good sort. With a man of that kind + I am always hail-fellow-well-met, and glad to drink a glass of tea with + him, or to eat a biscuit. One CAN’T help respecting a decent fellow. For + instance, this gentleman of mine—why, every one looks up to him, for + he has been in the Government’s service, and is a Collegiate Councillor.” + </p> + <p> + Thus soliloquising, he passed to more remote abstractions; until, had + Chichikov been listening, he would have learnt a number of interesting + details concerning himself. However, his thoughts were wholly occupied + with his own subject, so much so that not until a loud clap of thunder + awoke him from his reverie did he glance around him. The sky was + completely covered with clouds, and the dusty turnpike beginning to be + sprinkled with drops of rain. At length a second and a nearer and a louder + peal resounded, and the rain descended as from a bucket. Falling + slantwise, it beat upon one side of the basketwork of the tilt until the + splashings began to spurt into his face, and he found himself forced to + draw the curtains (fitted with circular openings through which to obtain a + glimpse of the wayside view), and to shout to Selifan to quicken his pace. + Upon that the coachman, interrupted in the middle of his harangue, + bethought him that no time was to be lost; wherefore, extracting from + under the box-seat a piece of old blanket, he covered over his sleeves, + resumed the reins, and cheered on his threefold team (which, it may be + said, had so completely succumbed to the influence of the pleasant + lassitude induced by Selifan’s discourse that it had taken to scarcely + placing one leg before the other). Unfortunately, Selifan could not + clearly remember whether two turnings had been passed or three. Indeed, on + collecting his faculties, and dimly recalling the lie of the road, he + became filled with a shrewd suspicion that A VERY LARGE NUMBER of turnings + had been passed. But since, at moments which call for a hasty decision, a + Russian is quick to discover what may conceivably be the best course to + take, our coachman put away from him all ulterior reasoning, and, turning + to the right at the next cross-road, shouted, “Hi, my beauties!” and set + off at a gallop. Never for a moment did he stop to think whither the road + might lead him! + </p> + <p> + It was long before the clouds had discharged their burden, and, meanwhile, + the dust on the road became kneaded into mire, and the horses’ task of + pulling the britchka heavier and heavier. Also, Chichikov had taken alarm + at his continued failure to catch sight of Sobakevitch’s country house. + According to his calculations, it ought to have been reached long ago. He + gazed about him on every side, but the darkness was too dense for the eye + to pierce. + </p> + <p> + “Selifan!” he exclaimed, leaning forward in the britchka. + </p> + <p> + “What is it, barin?” replied the coachman. + </p> + <p> + “Can you see the country house anywhere?” + </p> + <p> + “No, barin.” After which, with a flourish of the whip, the man broke into + a sort of endless, drawling song. In that song everything had a place. By + “everything” I mean both the various encouraging and stimulating cries + with which Russian folk urge on their horses, and a random, unpremeditated + selection of adjectives. + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile Chichikov began to notice that the britchka was swaying + violently, and dealing him occasional bumps. Consequently he suspected + that it had left the road and was being dragged over a ploughed field. + Upon Selifan’s mind there appeared to have dawned a similar inkling, for + he had ceased to hold forth. + </p> + <p> + “You rascal, what road are you following?” inquired Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “I don’t know,” retorted the coachman. “What can a man do at a time of + night when the darkness won’t let him even see his whip?” And as Selifan + spoke the vehicle tilted to an angle which left Chichikov no choice but to + hang on with hands and teeth. At length he realised the fact that Selifan + was drunk. + </p> + <p> + “Stop, stop, or you will upset us!” he shouted to the fellow. + </p> + <p> + “No, no, barin,” replied Selifan. “HOW could I upset you? To upset people + is wrong. I know that very well, and should never dream of such conduct.” + </p> + <p> + Here he started to turn the vehicle round a little—and kept on doing + so until the britchka capsized on to its side, and Chichikov landed in the + mud on his hands and knees. Fortunately Selifan succeeded in stopping the + horses, although they would have stopped of themselves, seeing that they + were utterly worn out. This unforeseen catastrophe evidently astonished + their driver. Slipping from the box, he stood resting his hands against + the side of the britchka, while Chichikov tumbled and floundered about in + the mud, in a vain endeavour to wriggle clear of the stuff. + </p> + <p> + “Ah, you!” said Selifan meditatively to the britchka. “To think of + upsetting us like this!” + </p> + <p> + “You are as drunk as a lord!” exclaimed Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “No, no, barin. Drunk, indeed? Why, I know my manners too well. A word or + two with a friend—that is all that I have taken. Any one may talk + with a decent man when he meets him. There is nothing wrong in that. Also, + we had a snack together. There is nothing wrong in a snack—especially + a snack with a decent man.” + </p> + <p> + “What did I say to you when last you got drunk?” asked Chichikov. “Have + you forgotten what I said then?” + </p> + <p> + “No, no, barin. HOW could I forget it? I know what is what, and know that + it is not right to get drunk. All that I have been having is a word or two + with a decent man, for the reason that—” + </p> + <p> + “Well, if I lay the whip about you, you’ll know then how to talk to a + decent fellow, I’ll warrant!” + </p> + <p> + “As you please, barin,” replied the complacent Selifan. “Should you whip + me, you will whip me, and I shall have nothing to complain of. Why should + you not whip me if I deserve it? ’Tis for you to do as you like. Whippings + are necessary sometimes, for a peasant often plays the fool, and + discipline ought to be maintained. If I have deserved it, beat me. Why + should you not?” + </p> + <p> + This reasoning seemed, at the moment, irrefutable, and Chichikov said + nothing more. Fortunately fate had decided to take pity on the pair, for + from afar their ears caught the barking of a dog. Plucking up courage, + Chichikov gave orders for the britchka to be righted, and the horses to be + urged forward; and since a Russian driver has at least this merit, that, + owing to a keen sense of smell being able to take the place of eyesight, + he can, if necessary, drive at random and yet reach a destination of some + sort, Selifan succeeded, though powerless to discern a single object, in + directing his steeds to a country house near by, and that with such a + certainty of instinct that it was not until the shafts had collided with a + garden wall, and thereby made it clear that to proceed another pace was + impossible, that he stopped. All that Chichikov could discern through the + thick veil of pouring rain was something which resembled a verandah. So he + dispatched Selifan to search for the entrance gates, and that process + would have lasted indefinitely had it not been shortened by the + circumstance that, in Russia, the place of a Swiss footman is frequently + taken by watchdogs; of which animals a number now proclaimed the + travellers’ presence so loudly that Chichikov found himself forced to stop + his ears. Next, a light gleamed in one of the windows, and filtered in a + thin stream to the garden wall—thus revealing the whereabouts of the + entrance gates; whereupon Selifan fell to knocking at the gates until the + bolts of the house door were withdrawn and there issued therefrom a figure + clad in a rough cloak. + </p> + <p> + “Who is that knocking? What have you come for?” shouted the hoarse voice + of an elderly woman. + </p> + <p> + “We are travellers, good mother,” said Chichikov. “Pray allow us to spend + the night here.” + </p> + <p> + “Out upon you for a pair of gadabouts!” retorted the old woman. “A fine + time of night to be arriving! We don’t keep an hotel, mind you. This is a + lady’s residence.” + </p> + <p> + “But what are we to do, mother? We have lost our way, and cannot spend the + night out of doors in such weather.” + </p> + <p> + “No, we cannot. The night is dark and cold,” added Selifan. + </p> + <p> + “Hold your tongue, you fool!” exclaimed Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Who ARE you, then?” inquired the old woman. + </p> + <p> + “A dvorianin <a href="#linknote-12" id="linknoteref-12"><small>12</small></a>, good mother.” + </p> + <p> + Somehow the word dvorianin seemed to give the old woman food for thought. + </p> + <p> + “Wait a moment,” she said, “and I will tell the mistress.” + </p> + <p> + Two minutes later she returned with a lantern in her hand, the gates were + opened, and a light glimmered in a second window. Entering the courtyard, + the britchka halted before a moderate-sized mansion. The darkness did not + permit of very accurate observation being made, but, apparently, the + windows only of one-half of the building were illuminated, while a + quagmire in front of the door reflected the beams from the same. Meanwhile + the rain continued to beat sonorously down upon the wooden roof, and could + be heard trickling into a water butt; nor for a single moment did the dogs + cease to bark with all the strength of their lungs. One of them, throwing + up its head, kept venting a howl of such energy and duration that the + animal seemed to be howling for a handsome wager; while another, cutting + in between the yelpings of the first animal, kept restlessly reiterating, + like a postman’s bell, the notes of a very young puppy. Finally, an old + hound which appeared to be gifted with a peculiarly robust temperament + kept supplying the part of contrabasso, so that his growls resembled the + rumbling of a bass singer when a chorus is in full cry, and the tenors are + rising on tiptoe in their efforts to compass a particularly high note, and + the whole body of choristers are wagging their heads before approaching a + climax, and this contrabasso alone is tucking his bearded chin into his + collar, and sinking almost to a squatting posture on the floor, in order + to produce a note which shall cause the windows to shiver and their panes + to crack. Naturally, from a canine chorus of such executants it might + reasonably be inferred that the establishment was one of the utmost + respectability. To that, however, our damp, cold hero gave not a thought, + for all his mind was fixed upon bed. Indeed, the britchka had hardly come + to a standstill before he leapt out upon the doorstep, missed his footing, + and came within an ace of falling. To meet him there issued a female + younger than the first, but very closely resembling her; and on his being + conducted to the parlour, a couple of glances showed him that the room was + hung with old striped curtains, and ornamented with pictures of birds and + small, antique mirrors—the latter set in dark frames which were + carved to resemble scrolls of foliage. Behind each mirror was stuck either + a letter or an old pack of cards or a stocking, while on the wall hung a + clock with a flowered dial. More, however, Chichikov could not discern, + for his eyelids were as heavy as though smeared with treacle. Presently + the lady of the house herself entered—an elderly woman in a sort of + nightcap (hastily put on) and a flannel neck wrap. She belonged to that + class of lady landowners who are for ever lamenting failures of the + harvest and their losses thereby; to the class who, drooping their heads + despondently, are all the while stuffing money into striped purses, which + they keep hoarded in the drawers of cupboards. Into one purse they will + stuff rouble pieces, into another half roubles, and into a third + tchetvertachki <a href="#linknote-13" id="linknoteref-13"><small>13</small></a>, although from their mien you + would suppose that the cupboard contained only linen and nightshirts and + skeins of wool and the piece of shabby material which is destined—should + the old gown become scorched during the baking of holiday cakes and other + dainties, or should it fall into pieces of itself—to become + converted into a new dress. But the gown never does get burnt or wear out, + for the reason that the lady is too careful; wherefore the piece of shabby + material reposes in its unmade-up condition until the priest advises that + it be given to the niece of some widowed sister, together with a quantity + of other such rubbish. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov apologised for having disturbed the household with his + unexpected arrival. + </p> + <p> + “Not at all, not at all,” replied the lady. “But in what dreadful weather + God has brought you hither! What wind and what rain! You could not help + losing your way. Pray excuse us for being unable to make better + preparations for you at this time of night.” + </p> + <p> + Suddenly there broke in upon the hostess’ words the sound of a strange + hissing, a sound so loud that the guest started in alarm, and the more so + seeing that it increased until the room seemed filled with adders. On + glancing upwards, however, he recovered his composure, for he perceived + the sound to be emanating from the clock, which appeared to be in a mind + to strike. To the hissing sound there succeeded a wheezing one, until, + putting forth its best efforts, the thing struck two with as much clatter + as though some one had been hitting an iron pot with a cudgel. That done, + the pendulum returned to its right-left, right-left oscillation. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov thanked his hostess kindly, and said that he needed nothing, and + she must not put herself about: only for rest was he longing—though + also he should like to know whither he had arrived, and whether the + distance to the country house of land-owner Sobakevitch was anything very + great. To this the lady replied that she had never so much as heard the + name, since no gentleman of the name resided in the locality. + </p> + <p> + “But at least you are acquainted with landowner Manilov?” continued + Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “No. Who is he?” + </p> + <p> + “Another landed proprietor, madam.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, neither have I heard of him. No such landowner lives hereabouts.” + </p> + <p> + “Then who ARE your local landowners?” + </p> + <p> + “Bobrov, Svinin, Kanapatiev, Khapakin, Trepakin, and Plieshakov.” + </p> + <p> + “Are they rich men?” + </p> + <p> + “No, none of them. One of them may own twenty souls, and another thirty, + but of gentry who own a hundred there are none.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov reflected that he had indeed fallen into an aristocratic + wilderness! + </p> + <p> + “At all events, is the town far away?” he inquired. + </p> + <p> + “About sixty versts. How sorry I am that I have nothing for you to eat! + Should you care to drink some tea?” + </p> + <p> + “I thank you, good mother, but I require nothing beyond a bed.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, after such a journey you must indeed be needing rest, so you shall + lie upon this sofa. Fetinia, bring a quilt and some pillows and sheets. + What weather God has sent us! And what dreadful thunder! Ever since sunset + I have had a candle burning before the ikon in my bedroom. My God! Why, + your back and sides are as muddy as a boar’s! However have you managed to + get into such a state?” + </p> + <p> + “That I am nothing worse than muddy is indeed fortunate, since, but for + the Almighty, I should have had my ribs broken.” + </p> + <p> + “Dear, dear! To think of all that you must have been through. Had I not + better wipe your back?” + </p> + <p> + “I thank you, I thank you, but you need not trouble. Merely be so good as + to tell your maid to dry my clothes.” + </p> + <p> + “Do you hear that, Fetinia?” said the hostess, turning to a woman who was + engaged in dragging in a feather bed and deluging the room with feathers. + “Take this coat and this vest, and, after drying them before the fire—just + as we used to do for your late master—give them a good rub, and fold + them up neatly.” + </p> + <p> + “Very well, mistress,” said Fetinia, spreading some sheets over the bed, + and arranging the pillows. + </p> + <p> + “Now your bed is ready for you,” said the hostess to Chichikov. + “Good-night, dear sir. I wish you good-night. Is there anything else that + you require? Perhaps you would like to have your heels tickled before + retiring to rest? Never could my late husband get to sleep without that + having been done.” + </p> + <p> + But the guest declined the proffered heel-tickling, and, on his hostess + taking her departure, hastened to divest himself of his clothing, both + upper and under, and to hand the garments to Fetinia. She wished him + good-night, and removed the wet trappings; after which he found himself + alone. Not without satisfaction did he eye his bed, which reached almost + to the ceiling. Clearly Fetinia was a past mistress in the art of beating + up such a couch, and, as the result, he had no sooner mounted it with the + aid of a chair than it sank well-nigh to the floor, and the feathers, + squeezed out of their proper confines, flew hither and thither into every + corner of the apartment. Nevertheless he extinguished the candle, covered + himself over with the chintz quilt, snuggled down beneath it, and + instantly fell asleep. Next day it was late in the morning before he + awoke. Through the window the sun was shining into his eyes, and the flies + which, overnight, had been roosting quietly on the walls and ceiling now + turned their attention to the visitor. One settled on his lip, another on + his ear, a third hovered as though intending to lodge in his very eye, and + a fourth had the temerity to alight just under his nostrils. In his drowsy + condition he inhaled the latter insect, sneezed violently, and so returned + to consciousness. He glanced around the room, and perceived that not all + the pictures were representative of birds, since among them hung also a + portrait of Kutuzov <a href="#linknote-14" id="linknoteref-14"><small>14</small></a> and an oil painting of an old + man in a uniform with red facings such as were worn in the days of the + Emperor Paul <a href="#linknote-15" id="linknoteref-15"><small>15</small></a>. At this moment the clock + uttered its usual hissing sound, and struck ten, while a woman’s face + peered in at the door, but at once withdrew, for the reason that, with the + object of sleeping as well as possible, Chichikov had removed every stitch + of his clothing. Somehow the face seemed to him familiar, and he set + himself to recall whose it could be. At length he recollected that it was + the face of his hostess. His clothes he found lying, clean and dry, beside + him; so he dressed and approached the mirror, meanwhile sneezing again + with such vehemence that a cock which happened at the moment to be near + the window (which was situated at no great distance from the ground) + chuckled a short, sharp phrase. Probably it meant, in the bird’s alien + tongue, “Good morning to you!” Chichikov retorted by calling the bird a + fool, and then himself approached the window to look at the view. It + appeared to comprise a poulterer’s premises. At all events, the narrow + yard in front of the window was full of poultry and other domestic + creatures—of game fowls and barn door fowls, with, among them, a + cock which strutted with measured gait, and kept shaking its comb, and + tilting its head as though it were trying to listen to something. Also, a + sow and her family were helping to grace the scene. First, she rooted + among a heap of litter; then, in passing, she ate up a young pullet; + lastly, she proceeded carelessly to munch some pieces of melon rind. To + this small yard or poultry-run a length of planking served as a fence, + while beyond it lay a kitchen garden containing cabbages, onions, + potatoes, beetroots, and other household vegetables. Also, the garden + contained a few stray fruit trees that were covered with netting to + protect them from the magpies and sparrows; flocks of which were even then + wheeling and darting from one spot to another. For the same reason a + number of scarecrows with outstretched arms stood reared on long poles, + with, surmounting one of the figures, a cast-off cap of the hostess’s. + Beyond the garden again there stood a number of peasants’ huts. Though + scattered, instead of being arranged in regular rows, these appeared to + Chichikov’s eye to comprise well-to-do inhabitants, since all rotten + planks in their roofing had been replaced with new ones, and none of their + doors were askew, and such of their tiltsheds as faced him evinced + evidence of a presence of a spare waggon—in some cases almost a new + one. + </p> + <p> + “This lady owns by no means a poor village,” said Chichikov to himself; + wherefore he decided then and there to have a talk with his hostess, and + to cultivate her closer acquaintance. Accordingly he peeped through the + chink of the door whence her head had recently protruded, and, on seeing + her seated at a tea table, entered and greeted her with a cheerful, kindly + smile. + </p> + <p> + “Good morning, dear sir,” she responded as she rose. “How have you slept?” + She was dressed in better style than she had been on the previous evening. + That is to say, she was now wearing a gown of some dark colour, and lacked + her nightcap, and had swathed her neck in something stiff. + </p> + <p> + “I have slept exceedingly well,” replied Chichikov, seating himself upon a + chair. “And how are YOU, good madam?” + </p> + <p> + “But poorly, my dear sir.” + </p> + <p> + “And why so?” + </p> + <p> + “Because I cannot sleep. A pain has taken me in my middle, and my legs, + from the ankles upwards, are aching as though they were broken.” + </p> + <p> + “That will pass, that will pass, good mother. You must pay no attention to + it.” + </p> + <p> + “God grant that it MAY pass. However, I have been rubbing myself with lard + and turpentine. What sort of tea will you take? In this jar I have some of + the scented kind.” + </p> + <p> + “Excellent, good mother! Then I will take that.” + </p> + <p> + Probably the reader will have noticed that, for all his expressions of + solicitude, Chichikov’s tone towards his hostess partook of a freer, a + more unceremonious, nature than that which he had adopted towards Madam + Manilov. And here I should like to assert that, howsoever much, in certain + respects, we Russians may be surpassed by foreigners, at least we surpass + them in adroitness of manner. In fact the various shades and subtleties of + our social intercourse defy enumeration. A Frenchman or a German would be + incapable of envisaging and understanding all its peculiarities and + differences, for his tone in speaking to a millionaire differs but little + from that which he employs towards a small tobacconist—and that in + spite of the circumstance that he is accustomed to cringe before the + former. With us, however, things are different. In Russian society there + exist clever folk who can speak in one manner to a landowner possessed of + two hundred peasant souls, and in another to a landowner possessed of + three hundred, and in another to a landowner possessed of five hundred. In + short, up to the number of a million souls the Russian will have ready for + each landowner a suitable mode of address. For example, suppose that + somewhere there exists a government office, and that in that office there + exists a director. I would beg of you to contemplate him as he sits among + his myrmidons. Sheer nervousness will prevent you from uttering a word in + his presence, so great are the pride and superiority depicted on his + countenance. Also, were you to sketch him, you would be sketching a + veritable Prometheus, for his glance is as that of an eagle, and he walks + with measured, stately stride. Yet no sooner will the eagle have left the + room to seek the study of his superior officer than he will go scurrying + along (papers held close to his nose) like any partridge. But in society, + and at the evening party (should the rest of those present be of lesser + rank than himself) the Prometheus will once more become Prometheus, and + the man who stands a step below him will treat him in a way never dreamt + of by Ovid, seeing that each fly is of lesser account than its superior + fly, and becomes, in the presence of the latter, even as a grain of sand. + “Surely that is not Ivan Petrovitch?” you will say of such and such a man + as you regard him. “Ivan Petrovitch is tall, whereas this man is small and + spare. Ivan Petrovitch has a loud, deep voice, and never smiles, whereas + this man (whoever he may be) is twittering like a sparrow, and smiling all + the time.” Yet approach and take a good look at the fellow and you will + see that is IS Ivan Petrovitch. “Alack, alack!” will be the only remark + you can make. + </p> + <p> + Let us return to our characters in real life. We have seen that, on this + occasion, Chichikov decided to dispense with ceremony; wherefore, taking + up the teapot, he went on as follows: + </p> + <p> + “You have a nice little village here, madam. How many souls does it + contain?” + </p> + <p> + “A little less than eighty, dear sir. But the times are hard, and I have + lost a great deal through last year’s harvest having proved a failure.” + </p> + <p> + “But your peasants look fine, strong fellows. May I enquire your name? + Through arriving so late at night I have quite lost my wits.” + </p> + <p> + “Korobotchka, the widow of a Collegiate Secretary.” + </p> + <p> + “I humbly thank you. And your Christian name and patronymic?” + </p> + <p> + “Nastasia Petrovna.” + </p> + <p> + “Nastasia Petrovna! Those are excellent names. I have a maternal aunt + named like yourself.” + </p> + <p> + “And YOUR name?” queried the lady. “May I take it that you are a + Government Assessor?” + </p> + <p> + “No, madam,” replied Chichikov with a smile. “I am not an Assessor, but a + traveller on private business.” + </p> + <p> + “Then you must be a buyer of produce? How I regret that I have sold my + honey so cheaply to other buyers! Otherwise YOU might have bought it, dear + sir.” + </p> + <p> + “I never buy honey.” + </p> + <p> + “Then WHAT do you buy, pray? Hemp? I have a little of that by me, but not + more than half a pood <a href="#linknote-16" id="linknoteref-16"><small>16</small></a> or so.” + </p> + <p> + “No, madam. It is in other wares that I deal. Tell me, have you, of late + years, lost many of your peasants by death?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes; no fewer than eighteen,” responded the old lady with a sigh. “Such a + fine lot, too—all good workers! True, others have since grown up, + but of what use are THEY? Mere striplings. When the Assessor last called + upon me I could have wept; for, though those workmen of mine are dead, I + have to keep on paying for them as though they were still alive! And only + last week my blacksmith got burnt to death! Such a clever hand at his + trade he was!” + </p> + <p> + “What? A fire occurred at your place?” + </p> + <p> + “No, no, God preserve us all! It was not so bad as that. You must + understand that the blacksmith SET HIMSELF on fire—he got set on + fire in his bowels through overdrinking. Yes, all of a sudden there burst + from him a blue flame, and he smouldered and smouldered until he had + turned as black as a piece of charcoal! Yet what a clever blacksmith he + was! And now I have no horses to drive out with, for there is no one to + shoe them.” + </p> + <p> + “In everything the will of God, madam,” said Chichikov with a sigh. + “Against the divine wisdom it is not for us to rebel. Pray hand them over + to me, Nastasia Petrovna.” + </p> + <p> + “Hand over whom?” + </p> + <p> + “The dead peasants.” + </p> + <p> + “But how could I do that?” + </p> + <p> + “Quite simply. Sell them to me, and I will give you some money in + exchange.” + </p> + <p> + “But how am I to sell them to you? I scarcely understand what you mean. Am + I to dig them up again from the ground?” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov perceived that the old lady was altogether at sea, and that he + must explain the matter; wherefore in a few words he informed her that the + transfer or purchase of the souls in question would take place merely on + paper—that the said souls would be listed as still alive. + </p> + <p> + “And what good would they be to you?” asked his hostess, staring at him + with her eyes distended. + </p> + <p> + “That is MY affair.” + </p> + <p> + “But they are DEAD souls.” + </p> + <p> + “Who said they were not? The mere fact of their being dead entails upon + you a loss as dead as the souls, for you have to continue paying tax upon + them, whereas MY plan is to relieve you both of the tax and of the + resultant trouble. NOW do you understand? And I will not only do as I say, + but also hand you over fifteen roubles per soul. Is that clear enough?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes—but I do not know,” said his hostess diffidently. “You see, + never before have I sold dead souls.” + </p> + <p> + “Quite so. It would be a surprising thing if you had. But surely you do + not think that these dead souls are in the least worth keeping?” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, no, indeed! Why should they be worth keeping? I am sure they are not + so. The only thing which troubles me is the fact that they are DEAD.” + </p> + <p> + “She seems a truly obstinate old woman!” was Chichikov’s inward comment. + “Look here, madam,” he added aloud. “You reason well, but you are simply + ruining yourself by continuing to pay the tax upon dead souls as though + they were still alive.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, good sir, do not speak of it!” the lady exclaimed. “Three weeks ago I + took a hundred and fifty roubles to that Assessor, and buttered him up, + and—” + </p> + <p> + “Then you see how it is, do you not? Remember that, according to my plan, + you will never again have to butter up the Assessor, seeing that it will + be I who will be paying for those peasants—<i>I</i>, not YOU, for I + shall have taken over the dues upon them, and have transferred them to + myself as so many bona fide serfs. Do you understand AT LAST?” + </p> + <p> + However, the old lady still communed with herself. She could see that the + transaction would be to her advantage, yet it was one of such a novel and + unprecedented nature that she was beginning to fear lest this purchaser of + souls intended to cheat her. Certainly he had come from God only knew + where, and at the dead of night, too! + </p> + <p> + “But, sir, I have never in my life sold dead folk—only living ones. + Three years ago I transferred two wenches to Protopopov for a hundred + roubles apiece, and he thanked me kindly, for they turned out splendid + workers—able to make napkins or anything else. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but with the living we have nothing to do, damn it! I am asking you + only about DEAD folk.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, yes, of course. But at first sight I felt afraid lest I should be + incurring a loss—lest you should be wishing to outwit me, good sir. + You see, the dead souls are worth rather more than you have offered for + them.” + </p> + <p> + “See here, madam. (What a woman it is!) HOW could they be worth more? + Think for yourself. They are so much loss to you—so much loss, do + you understand? Take any worthless, rubbishy article you like—a + piece of old rag, for example. That rag will yet fetch its price, for it + can be bought for paper-making. But these dead souls are good for NOTHING + AT ALL. Can you name anything that they ARE good for?” + </p> + <p> + “True, true—they ARE good for nothing. But what troubles me is the + fact that they are dead.” + </p> + <p> + “What a blockhead of a creature!” said Chichikov to himself, for he was + beginning to lose patience. “Bless her heart, I may as well be going. She + has thrown me into a perfect sweat, the cursed old shrew!” + </p> + <p> + He took a handkerchief from his pocket, and wiped the perspiration from + his brow. Yet he need not have flown into such a passion. More than one + respected statesman reveals himself, when confronted with a business + matter, to be just such another as Madam Korobotchka, in that, once he has + got an idea into his head, there is no getting it out of him—you may + ply him with daylight-clear arguments, yet they will rebound from his + brain as an india-rubber ball rebounds from a flagstone. Nevertheless, + wiping away the perspiration, Chichikov resolved to try whether he could + not bring her back to the road by another path. + </p> + <p> + “Madam,” he said, “either you are declining to understand what I say or + you are talking for the mere sake of talking. If I hand you over some + money—fifteen roubles for each soul, do you understand?—it is + MONEY, not something which can be picked up haphazard on the street. For + instance, tell me how much you sold your honey for?” + </p> + <p> + “For twelve roubles per pood.” + </p> + <p> + “Ah! Then by those words, madam, you have laid a trifling sin upon your + soul; for you did NOT sell the honey for twelve roubles.” + </p> + <p> + “By the Lord God I did!” + </p> + <p> + “Well, well! Never mind. Honey is only honey. Now, you had collected that + stuff, it may be, for a year, and with infinite care and labour. You had + fussed after it, you had trotted to and fro, you had duly frozen out the + bees, and you had fed them in the cellar throughout the winter. But these + dead souls of which I speak are quite another matter, for in this case you + have put forth no exertions—it was merely God’s will that they + should leave the world, and thus decrease the personnel of your + establishment. In the former case you received (so you allege) twelve + roubles per pood for your labour; but in this case you will receive money + for having done nothing at all. Nor will you receive twelve roubles per + item, but FIFTEEN—and roubles not in silver, but roubles in good + paper currency.” + </p> + <p> + That these powerful inducements would certainly cause the old woman to + yield Chichikov had not a doubt. + </p> + <p> + “True,” his hostess replied. “But how strangely business comes to me as a + widow! Perhaps I had better wait a little longer, seeing that other buyers + might come along, and I might be able to compare prices.” + </p> + <p> + “For shame, madam! For shame! Think what you are saying. Who else, I would + ask, would care to buy those souls? What use could they be to any one?” + </p> + <p> + “If that is so, they might come in useful to ME,” mused the old woman + aloud; after which she sat staring at Chichikov with her mouth open and a + face of nervous expectancy as to his possible rejoinder. + </p> + <p> + “Dead folk useful in a household!” he exclaimed. “Why, what could you do + with them? Set them up on poles to frighten away the sparrows from your + garden?” + </p> + <p> + “The Lord save us, but what things you say!” she ejaculated, crossing + herself. + </p> + <p> + “Well, WHAT could you do with them? By this time they are so much bones + and earth. That is all there is left of them. Their transfer to myself + would be ON PAPER only. Come, come! At least give me an answer.” + </p> + <p> + Again the old woman communed with herself. + </p> + <p> + “What are you thinking of, Nastasia Petrovna?” inquired Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “I am thinking that I scarcely know what to do. Perhaps I had better sell + you some hemp?” + </p> + <p> + “What do I want with hemp? Pardon me, but just when I have made to you a + different proposal altogether you begin fussing about hemp! Hemp is hemp, + and though I may want some when I NEXT visit you, I should like to know + what you have to say to the suggestion under discussion.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, I think it a very queer bargain. Never have I heard of such a + thing.” + </p> + <p> + Upon this Chichikov lost all patience, upset his chair, and bid her go to + the devil; of which personage even the mere mention terrified her + extremely. + </p> + <p> + “Do not speak of him, I beg of you!” she cried, turning pale. “May God, + rather, bless him! Last night was the third night that he has appeared to + me in a dream. You see, after saying my prayers, I bethought me of telling + my fortune by the cards; and God must have sent him as a punishment. He + looked so horrible, and had horns longer than a bull’s!” + </p> + <p> + “I wonder you don’t see SCORES of devils in your dreams! Merely out of + Christian charity he had come to you to say, ‘I perceive a poor widow + going to rack and ruin, and likely soon to stand in danger of want.’ Well, + go to rack and ruin—yes, you and all your village together!” + </p> + <p> + “The insults!” exclaimed the old woman, glancing at her visitor in terror. + </p> + <p> + “I should think so!” continued Chichikov. “Indeed, I cannot find words to + describe you. To say no more about it, you are like a dog in a manger. You + don’t want to eat the hay yourself, yet you won’t let anyone else touch + it. All that I am seeking to do is to purchase certain domestic products + of yours, for the reason that I have certain Government contracts to + fulfil.” This last he added in passing, and without any ulterior motive, + save that it came to him as a happy thought. Nevertheless the mention of + Government contracts exercised a powerful influence upon Nastasia + Petrovna, and she hastened to say in a tone that was almost supplicatory: + </p> + <p> + “Why should you be so angry with me? Had I known that you were going to + lose your temper in this way, I should never have discussed the matter.” + </p> + <p> + “No wonder that I lose my temper! An egg too many is no great matter, yet + it may prove exceedingly annoying.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, well, I will let you have the souls for fifteen roubles each. Also, + with regard to those contracts, do not forget me if at any time you should + find yourself in need of rye-meal or buckwheat or groats or dead meat.” + </p> + <p> + “No, I shall NEVER forget you, madam!” he said, wiping his forehead, where + three separate streams of perspiration were trickling down his face. Then + he asked her whether in the town she had any acquaintance or agent whom + she could empower to complete the transference of the serfs, and to carry + out whatsoever else might be necessary. + </p> + <p> + “Certainly,” replied Madame Korobotchka. “The son of our archpriest, + Father Cyril, himself is a lawyer.” + </p> + <p> + Upon that Chichikov begged her to accord the gentleman in question a power + of attorney, while, to save extra trouble, he himself would then and there + compose the requisite letter. + </p> + <p> + “It would be a fine thing if he were to buy up all my meal and stock for + the Government,” thought Madame to herself. “I must encourage him a + little. There has been some dough standing ready since last night, so I + will go and tell Fetinia to try a few pancakes. Also, it might be well to + try him with an egg pie. We make then nicely here, and they do not take + long in the making.” + </p> + <p> + So she departed to translate her thoughts into action, as well as to + supplement the pie with other products of the domestic cuisine; while, for + his part, Chichikov returned to the drawing-room where he had spent the + night, in order to procure from his dispatch-box the necessary + writing-paper. The room had now been set in order, the sumptuous feather + bed removed, and a table set before the sofa. Depositing his dispatch-box + upon the table, he heaved a gentle sigh on becoming aware that he was so + soaked with perspiration that he might almost have been dipped in a river. + Everything, from his shirt to his socks, was dripping. “May she starve to + death, the cursed old harridan!” he ejaculated after a moment’s rest. Then + he opened his dispatch-box. In passing, I may say that I feel certain that + at least SOME of my readers will be curious to know the contents and the + internal arrangements of that receptacle. Why should I not gratify their + curiosity? To begin with, the centre of the box contained a soap-dish, + with, disposed around it, six or seven compartments for razors. Next came + square partitions for a sand-box <a href="#linknote-17" id="linknoteref-17"><small>17</small></a> and an + inkstand, as well as (scooped out in their midst) a hollow of pens, + sealing-wax, and anything else that required more room. Lastly there were + all sorts of little divisions, both with and without lids, for articles of + a smaller nature, such as visiting cards, memorial cards, theatre tickets, + and things which Chichikov had laid by as souvenirs. This portion of the + box could be taken out, and below it were both a space for manuscripts and + a secret money-box—the latter made to draw out from the side of the + receptacle. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov set to work to clean a pen, and then to write. Presently his + hostess entered the room. + </p> + <p> + “What a beautiful box you have got, my dear sir!” she exclaimed as she + took a seat beside him. “Probably you bought it in Moscow?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes—in Moscow,” replied Chichikov without interrupting his writing. + </p> + <p> + “I thought so. One CAN get good things there. Three years ago my sister + brought me a few pairs of warm shoes for my sons, and they were such + excellent articles! To this day my boys wear them. And what nice stamped + paper you have!” (she had peered into the dispatch-box, where, sure + enough, there lay a further store of the paper in question). “Would you + mind letting me have a sheet of it? I am without any at all, although I + shall soon have to be presenting a plea to the land court, and possess not + a morsel of paper to write it on.” + </p> + <p> + Upon this Chichikov explained that the paper was not the sort proper for + the purpose—that it was meant for serf-indenturing, and not for the + framing of pleas. Nevertheless, to quiet her, he gave her a sheet stamped + to the value of a rouble. Next, he handed her the letter to sign, and + requested, in return, a list of her peasants. Unfortunately, such a list + had never been compiled, let alone any copies of it, and the only way in + which she knew the peasants’ names was by heart. However, he told her to + dictate them. Some of the names greatly astonished our hero, so, still + more, did the surnames. Indeed, frequently, on hearing the latter, he had + to pause before writing them down. Especially did he halt before a certain + “Peter Saveliev Neuvazhai Korito.” “What a string of titles!” + involuntarily he ejaculated. To the Christian name of another serf was + appended “Korovi Kirpitch,” and to that of a third “Koleso Ivan.” However, + at length the list was compiled, and he caught a deep breath; which latter + proceeding caused him to catch also the attractive odour of something + fried in fat. + </p> + <p> + “I beseech you to have a morsel,” murmured his hostess. Chichikov looked + up, and saw that the table was spread with mushrooms, pies, and other + viands. + </p> + <p> + “Try this freshly-made pie and an egg,” continued Madame. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov did so, and having eaten more than half of what she offered him, + praised the pie highly. Indeed, it was a toothsome dish, and, after his + difficulties and exertions with his hostess, it tasted even better than it + might otherwise have done. + </p> + <p> + “And also a few pancakes?” suggested Madame. + </p> + <p> + For answer Chichikov folded three together, and, having dipped them in + melted butter, consigned the lot to his mouth, and then wiped his mouth + with a napkin. Twice more was the process repeated, and then he requested + his hostess to order the britchka to be got ready. In dispatching Fetinia + with the necessary instructions, she ordered her to return with a second + batch of hot pancakes. + </p> + <p> + “Your pancakes are indeed splendid,” said Chichikov, applying himself to + the second consignment of fried dainties when they had arrived. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, we make them well here,” replied Madame. “Yet how unfortunate it is + that the harvest should have proved so poor as to have prevented me from + earning anything on my—But why should you be in such a hurry to + depart, good sir?” She broke off on seeing Chichikov reach for his cap. + “The britchka is not yet ready.” + </p> + <p> + “Then it is being got so, madam, it is being got so, and I shall need a + moment or two to pack my things.” + </p> + <p> + “As you please, dear sir; but do not forget me in connection with those + Government contracts.” + </p> + <p> + “No, I have said that NEVER shall I forget you,” replied Chichikov as he + hurried into the hall. + </p> + <p> + “And would you like to buy some lard?” continued his hostess, pursuing + him. + </p> + <p> + “Lard? Oh certainly. Why not? Only, only—I will do so ANOTHER time.” + </p> + <p> + “I shall have some ready at about Christmas.” + </p> + <p> + “Quite so, madam. THEN I will buy anything and everything—the lard + included.” + </p> + <p> + “And perhaps you will be wanting also some feathers? I shall be having + some for sale about St. Philip’s Day.” + </p> + <p> + “Very well, very well, madam.” + </p> + <p> + “There you see!” she remarked as they stepped out on to the verandah. “The + britchka is NOT yet ready.” + </p> + <p> + “But it soon will be, it soon will be. Only direct me to the main road.” + </p> + <p> + “How am I to do that?” said Madame. “‘Twould puzzle a wise man to do so, + for in these parts there are so many turnings. However, I will send a girl + to guide you. You could find room for her on the box-seat, could you not?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, of course.” + </p> + <p> + “Then I will send her. She knows the way thoroughly. Only do not carry her + off for good. Already some traders have deprived me of one of my girls.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov reassured his hostess on the point, and Madame plucked up + courage enough to scan, first of all, the housekeeper, who happened to be + issuing from the storehouse with a bowl of honey, and, next, a young + peasant who happened to be standing at the gates; and, while thus engaged, + she became wholly absorbed in her domestic pursuits. But why pay her so + much attention? The Widow Korobotchka, Madame Manilov, domestic life, + non-domestic life—away with them all! How strangely are things + compounded! In a trice may joy turn to sorrow, should one halt long enough + over it: in a trice only God can say what ideas may strike one. You may + fall even to thinking: “After all, did Madame Korobotchka stand so very + low in the scale of human perfection? Was there really such a very great + gulf between her and Madame Manilov—between her and the Madame + Manilov whom we have seen entrenched behind the walls of a genteel mansion + in which there were a fine staircase of wrought metal and a number of rich + carpets; the Madame Manilov who spent most of her time in yawning behind + half-read books, and in hoping for a visit from some socially + distinguished person in order that she might display her wit and carefully + rehearsed thoughts—thoughts which had been de rigueur in town for a + week past, yet which referred, not to what was going on in her household + or on her estate—both of which properties were at odds and ends, + owing to her ignorance of the art of managing them—but to the coming + political revolution in France and the direction in which fashionable + Catholicism was supposed to be moving? But away with such things! Why need + we speak of them? Yet how comes it that suddenly into the midst of our + careless, frivolous, unthinking moments there may enter another, and a + very different, tendency?—that the smile may not have left a human + face before its owner will have radically changed his or her nature + (though not his or her environment) with the result that the face will + suddenly become lit with a radiance never before seen there?... + </p> + <p> + “Here is the britchka, here is the britchka!” exclaimed Chichikov on + perceiving that vehicle slowly advancing. “Ah, you blockhead!” he went on + to Selifan. “Why have you been loitering about? I suppose last night’s + fumes have not yet left your brain?” + </p> + <p> + To this Selifan returned no reply. + </p> + <p> + “Good-bye, madam,” added the speaker. “But where is the girl whom you + promised me?” + </p> + <p> + “Here, Pelagea!” called the hostess to a wench of about eleven who was + dressed in home-dyed garments and could boast of a pair of bare feet + which, from a distance, might almost have been mistaken for boots, so + encrusted were they with fresh mire. “Here, Pelagea! Come and show this + gentleman the way.” + </p> + <p> + Selifan helped the girl to ascend to the box-seat. Placing one foot upon + the step by which the gentry mounted, she covered the said step with mud, + and then, ascending higher, attained the desired position beside the + coachman. Chichikov followed in her wake (causing the britchka to heel + over with his weight as he did so), and then settled himself back into his + place with an “All right! Good-bye, madam!” as the horses moved away at a + trot. + </p> + <p> + Selifan looked gloomy as he drove, but also very attentive to his + business. This was invariably his custom when he had committed the fault + of getting drunk. Also, the horses looked unusually well-groomed. In + particular, the collar on one of them had been neatly mended, although + hitherto its state of dilapidation had been such as perennially to allow + the stuffing to protrude through the leather. The silence preserved was + well-nigh complete. Merely flourishing his whip, Selifan spoke to the team + no word of instruction, although the skewbald was as ready as usual to + listen to conversation of a didactic nature, seeing that at such times the + reins hung loosely in the hands of the loquacious driver, and the whip + wandered merely as a matter of form over the backs of the troika. This + time, however, there could be heard issuing from Selifan’s sullen lips + only the uniformly unpleasant exclamation, “Now then, you brutes! Get on + with you, get on with you!” The bay and the Assessor too felt put out at + not hearing themselves called “my pets” or “good lads”; while, in + addition, the skewbald came in for some nasty cuts across his sleek and + ample quarters. “What has put master out like this?” thought the animal as + it shook its head. “Heaven knows where he does not keep beating me—across + the back, and even where I am tenderer still. Yes, he keeps catching the + whip in my ears, and lashing me under the belly.” + </p> + <p> + “To the right, eh?” snapped Selifan to the girl beside him as he pointed + to a rain-soaked road which trended away through fresh green fields. + </p> + <p> + “No, no,” she replied. “I will show you the road when the time comes.” + </p> + <p> + “Which way, then?” he asked again when they had proceeded a little + further. + </p> + <p> + “This way.” And she pointed to the road just mentioned. + </p> + <p> + “Get along with you!” retorted the coachman. “That DOES go to the right. + You don’t know your right hand from your left.” + </p> + <p> + The weather was fine, but the ground so excessively sodden that the wheels + of the britchka collected mire until they had become caked as with a layer + of felt, a circumstance which greatly increased the weight of the vehicle, + and prevented it from clearing the neighbouring parishes before the + afternoon was arrived. Also, without the girl’s help the finding of the + way would have been impossible, since roads wiggled away in every + direction, like crabs released from a net, and, but for the assistance + mentioned, Selifan would have found himself left to his own devices. + Presently she pointed to a building ahead, with the words, “THERE is the + main road.” + </p> + <p> + “And what is the building?” asked Selifan. + </p> + <p> + “A tavern,” she said. + </p> + <p> + “Then we can get along by ourselves,” he observed. “Do you get down, and + be off home.” + </p> + <p> + With that he stopped, and helped her to alight—muttering as he did + so: “Ah, you blackfooted creature!” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov added a copper groat, and she departed well pleased with her + ride in the gentleman’s carriage. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0004"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER IV + </h3> + <p> + On reaching the tavern, Chichikov called a halt. His reasons for this were + twofold—namely, that he wanted to rest the horses, and that he + himself desired some refreshment. In this connection the author feels + bound to confess that the appetite and the capacity of such men are + greatly to be envied. Of those well-to-do folk of St. Petersburg and + Moscow who spend their time in considering what they shall eat on the + morrow, and in composing a dinner for the day following, and who never sit + down to a meal without first of all injecting a pill and then swallowing + oysters and crabs and a quantity of other monsters, while eternally + departing for Karlsbad or the Caucasus, the author has but a small + opinion. Yes, THEY are not the persons to inspire envy. Rather, it is the + folk of the middle classes—folk who at one posthouse call for bacon, + and at another for a sucking pig, and at a third for a steak of sturgeon + or a baked pudding with onions, and who can sit down to table at any hour, + as though they had never had a meal in their lives, and can devour fish of + all sorts, and guzzle and chew it with a view to provoking further + appetite—these, I say, are the folk who enjoy heaven’s most favoured + gift. To attain such a celestial condition the great folk of whom I have + spoken would sacrifice half their serfs and half their mortgaged and + non-mortgaged property, with the foreign and domestic improvements + thereon, if thereby they could compass such a stomach as is possessed by + the folk of the middle class. But, unfortunately, neither money nor real + estate, whether improved or non-improved, can purchase such a stomach. + </p> + <p> + The little wooden tavern, with its narrow, but hospitable, curtain + suspended from a pair of rough-hewn doorposts like old church + candlesticks, seemed to invite Chichikov to enter. True, the establishment + was only a Russian hut of the ordinary type, but it was a hut of larger + dimensions than usual, and had around its windows and gables carved and + patterned cornices of bright-coloured wood which threw into relief the + darker hue of the walls, and consorted well with the flowered pitchers + painted on the shutters. + </p> + <p> + Ascending the narrow wooden staircase to the upper floor, and arriving + upon a broad landing, Chichikov found himself confronted with a creaking + door and a stout old woman in a striped print gown. “This way, if you + please,” she said. Within the apartment designated Chichikov encountered + the old friends which one invariably finds in such roadside hostelries—to + wit, a heavy samovar, four smooth, bescratched walls of white pine, a + three-cornered press with cups and teapots, egg-cups of gilded china + standing in front of ikons suspended by blue and red ribands, a cat lately + delivered of a family, a mirror which gives one four eyes instead of two + and a pancake for a face, and, beside the ikons, some bunches of herbs and + carnations of such faded dustiness that, should one attempt to smell them, + one is bound to burst out sneezing. + </p> + <p> + “Have you a sucking-pig?” Chichikov inquired of the landlady as she stood + expectantly before him. + </p> + <p> + “Yes.” + </p> + <p> + “And some horse-radish and sour cream?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes.” + </p> + <p> + “Then serve them.” + </p> + <p> + The landlady departed for the purpose, and returned with a plate, a napkin + (the latter starched to the consistency of dried bark), a knife with a + bone handle beginning to turn yellow, a two-pronged fork as thin as a + wafer, and a salt-cellar incapable of being made to stand upright. + </p> + <p> + Following the accepted custom, our hero entered into conversation with the + woman, and inquired whether she herself or a landlord kept the tavern; how + much income the tavern brought in; whether her sons lived with her; + whether the oldest was a bachelor or married; whom the eldest had taken to + wife; whether the dowry had been large; whether the father-in-law had been + satisfied, and whether the said father-in-law had not complained of + receiving too small a present at the wedding. In short, Chichikov touched + on every conceivable point. Likewise (of course) he displayed some + curiosity as to the landowners of the neighbourhood. Their names, he + ascertained, were Blochin, Potchitaev, Minoi, Cheprakov, and Sobakevitch. + </p> + <p> + “Then you are acquainted with Sobakevitch?” he said; whereupon the old + woman informed him that she knew not only Sobakevitch, but also Manilov, + and that the latter was the more delicate eater of the two, since, whereas + Manilov always ordered a roast fowl and some veal and mutton, and then + tasted merely a morsel of each, Sobakevitch would order one dish only, but + consume the whole of it, and then demand more at the same price. + </p> + <p> + Whilst Chichikov was thus conversing and partaking of the sucking pig + until only a fragment of it seemed likely to remain, the sound of an + approaching vehicle made itself heard. Peering through the window, he saw + draw up to the tavern door a light britchka drawn by three fine horses. + From it there descended two men—one flaxen-haired and tall, and the + other dark-haired and of slighter build. While the flaxen-haired man was + clad in a dark-blue coat, the other one was wrapped in a coat of striped + pattern. Behind the britchka stood a second, but an empty, turn-out, drawn + by four long-coated steeds in ragged collars and rope harnesses. The + flaxen-haired man lost no time in ascending the staircase, while his + darker friend remained below to fumble at something in the britchka, + talking, as he did so, to the driver of the vehicle which stood hitched + behind. Somehow, the dark-haired man’s voice struck Chichikov as familiar; + and as he was taking another look at him the flaxen-haired gentleman + entered the room. The newcomer was a man of lofty stature, with a small + red moustache and a lean, hard-bitten face whose redness made it evident + that its acquaintance, if not with the smoke of gunpowder, at all events + with that of tobacco, was intimate and extensive. Nevertheless he greeted + Chichikov civilly, and the latter returned his bow. Indeed, the pair would + have entered into conversation, and have made one another’s acquaintance + (since a beginning was made with their simultaneously expressing + satisfaction at the circumstance that the previous night’s rain had laid + the dust on the roads, and thereby made driving cool and pleasant) when + the gentleman’s darker-favoured friend also entered the room, and, + throwing his cap upon the table, pushed back a mass of dishevelled black + locks from his brow. The latest arrival was a man of medium height, but + well put together, and possessed of a pair of full red cheeks, a set of + teeth as white as snow, and coal-black whiskers. Indeed, so fresh was his + complexion that it seemed to have been compounded of blood and milk, while + health danced in his every feature. + </p> + <p> + “Ha, ha, ha!” he cried with a gesture of astonishment at the sight of + Chichikov. “What chance brings YOU here?” + </p> + <p> + Upon that Chichikov recognised Nozdrev—the man whom he had met at + dinner at the Public Prosecutor’s, and who, within a minute or two of the + introduction, had become so intimate with his fellow guest as to address + him in the second person singular, in spite of the fact that Chichikov had + given him no opportunity for doing so. + </p> + <p> + “Where have you been to-day?” Nozdrev inquired, and, without waiting for + an answer, went on: “For myself, I am just from the fair, and completely + cleaned out. Actually, I have had to do the journey back with stage + horses! Look out of the window, and see them for yourself.” And he turned + Chichikov’s head so sharply in the desired direction that he came very + near to bumping it against the window frame. “Did you ever see such a bag + of tricks? The cursed things have only just managed to get here. In fact, + on the way I had to transfer myself to this fellow’s britchka.” He + indicated his companion with a finger. “By the way, don’t you know one + another? He is Mizhuev, my brother-in-law. He and I were talking of you + only this morning. ‘Just you see,’ said I to him, ‘if we do not fall in + with Chichikov before we have done.’ Heavens, how completely cleaned out I + am! Not only have I lost four good horses, but also my watch and chain.” + Chichikov perceived that in very truth his interlocutor was minus the + articles named, as well as that one of Nozdrev’s whiskers was less bushy + in appearance than the other one. “Had I had another twenty roubles in my + pocket,” went on Nozdrev, “I should have won back all that I have lost, as + well as have pouched a further thirty thousand. Yes, I give you my word of + honour on that.” + </p> + <p> + “But you were saying the same thing when last I met you,” put in the + flaxen-haired man. “Yet, even though I lent you fifty roubles, you lost + them all.” + </p> + <p> + “But I should not have lost them THIS time. Don’t try to make me out a + fool. I should NOT have lost them, I tell you. Had I only played the right + card, I should have broken the bank.” + </p> + <p> + “But you did NOT break the bank,” remarked the flaxen-haired man. + </p> + <p> + “No. That was because I did not play my cards right. But what about your + precious major’s play? Is THAT good?” + </p> + <p> + “Good or not, at least he beat you.” + </p> + <p> + “Splendid of him! Nevertheless I will get my own back. Let him play me at + doubles, and we shall soon see what sort of a player he is! Friend + Chichikov, at first we had a glorious time, for the fair was a tremendous + success. Indeed, the tradesmen said that never yet had there been such a + gathering. I myself managed to sell everything from my estate at a good + price. In fact, we had a magnificent time. I can’t help thinking of it, + devil take me! But what a pity YOU were not there! Three versts from the + town there is quartered a regiment of dragoons, and you would scarcely + believe what a lot of officers it has. Forty at least there are, and they + do a fine lot of knocking about the town and drinking. In particular, + Staff-Captain Potsieluev is a SPLENDID fellow! You should just see his + moustache! Why, he calls good claret ‘trash’! ‘Bring me some of the usual + trash,’ is his way of ordering it. And Lieutenant Kuvshinnikov, too! He is + as delightful as the other man. In fact, I may say that every one of the + lot is a rake. I spent my whole time with them, and you can imagine that + Ponomarev, the wine merchant, did a fine trade indeed! All the same, he is + a rascal, you know, and ought not to be dealt with, for he puts all sorts + of rubbish into his liquor—Indian wood and burnt cork and elderberry + juice, the villain! Nevertheless, get him to produce a bottle from what he + calls his ‘special cellar,’ and you will fancy yourself in the seventh + heaven of delight. And what quantities of champagne we drank! Compared + with it, provincial stuff is kvass <a href="#linknote-18" id="linknoteref-18"><small>18</small></a>. Try to + imagine not merely Clicquot, but a sort of blend of Clicquot and Matradura—Clicquot + of double strength. Also Ponomarev produced a bottle of French stuff which + he calls ‘Bonbon.’ Had it a bouquet, ask you? Why, it had the bouquet of a + rose garden, of anything else you like. What times we had, to be sure! + Just after we had left Pnomarev’s place, some prince or another arrived in + the town, and sent out for some champagne; but not a bottle was there + left, for the officers had drunk every one! Why, I myself got through + seventeen bottles at a sitting.” + </p> + <p> + “Come, come! You CAN’T have got through seventeen,” remarked the + flaxen-haired man. + </p> + <p> + “But I did, I give my word of honour,” retorted Nozdrev. + </p> + <p> + “Imagine what you like, but you didn’t drink even TEN bottles at a + sitting.” + </p> + <p> + “Will you bet that I did not?” + </p> + <p> + “No; for what would be the use of betting about it?” + </p> + <p> + “Then at least wager the gun which you have bought.” + </p> + <p> + “No, I am not going to do anything of the kind.” + </p> + <p> + “Just as an experiment?” + </p> + <p> + “No.” + </p> + <p> + “It is as well for you that you don’t, since, otherwise, you would have + found yourself minus both gun and cap. However, friend Chichikov, it is a + pity you were not there. Had you been there, I feel sure you would have + found yourself unable to part with Lieutenant Kuvshinnikov. You and he + would have hit it off splendidly. You know, he is quite a different sort + from the Public Prosecutor and our other provincial skinflints—fellows + who shiver in their shoes before they will spend a single kopeck. HE will + play faro, or anything else, and at any time. Why did you not come with + us, instead of wasting your time on cattle breeding or something of the + sort? But never mind. Embrace me. I like you immensely. Mizhuev, see how + curiously things have turned out. Chichikov has nothing to do with me, or + I with him, yet here is he come from God knows where, and landed in the + very spot where I happen to be living! I may tell you that, no matter how + many carriages I possessed, I should gamble the lot away. Recently I went + in for a turn at billiards, and lost two jars of pomade, a china teapot, + and a guitar. Then I staked some more things, and, like a fool, lost them + all, and six roubles in addition. What a dog is that Kuvshinnikov! He and + I attended nearly every ball in the place. In particular, there was a + woman—decolletee, and such a swell! I merely thought to myself, ‘The + devil take her!’ but Kuvshinnikov is such a wag that he sat down beside + her, and began paying her strings of compliments in French. However, I did + not neglect the damsels altogether—although HE calls that sort of + thing ‘going in for strawberries.’ By the way, I have a splendid piece of + fish and some caviare with me. ’Tis all I HAVE brought back! In fact it is + a lucky chance that I happened to buy the stuff before my money was gone. + Where are you for?” + </p> + <p> + “I am about to call on a friend.” + </p> + <p> + “On what friend? Let him go to the devil, and come to my place instead.” + </p> + <p> + “I cannot, I cannot. I have business to do.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, business again! I thought so!” + </p> + <p> + “But I HAVE business to do—and pressing business at that.” + </p> + <p> + “I wager that you’re lying. If not, tell me whom you’re going to call + upon.” + </p> + <p> + “Upon Sobakevitch.” + </p> + <p> + Instantly Nozdrev burst into a laugh compassable only by a healthy man in + whose head every tooth still remains as white as sugar. By this I mean the + laugh of quivering cheeks, the laugh which causes a neighbour who is + sleeping behind double doors three rooms away to leap from his bed and + exclaim with distended eyes, “Hullo! Something HAS upset him!” + </p> + <p> + “What is there to laugh at?” asked Chichikov, a trifle nettled; but + Nozdrev laughed more unrestrainedly than ever, ejaculating: “Oh, spare us + all! The thing is so amusing that I shall die of it!” + </p> + <p> + “I say that there is nothing to laugh at,” repeated Chichikov. “It is in + fulfilment of a promise that I am on my way to Sobakevitch’s.” + </p> + <p> + “Then you will scarcely be glad to be alive when you’ve got there, for he + is the veriest miser in the countryside. Oh, <i>I</i> know you. However, + if you think to find there either faro or a bottle of ‘Bonbon’ you are + mistaken. Look here, my good friend. Let Sobakevitch go to the devil, and + come to MY place, where at least I shall have a piece of sturgeon to offer + you for dinner. Ponomarev said to me on parting: ‘This piece is just the + thing for you. Even if you were to search the whole market, you would + never find a better one.’ But of course he is a terrible rogue. I said to + him outright: ‘You and the Collector of Taxes are the two greatest + skinflints in the town.’ But he only stroked his beard and smiled. Every + day I used to breakfast with Kuvshinnikov in his restaurant. Well, what I + was nearly forgetting is this: that, though I am aware that you can’t + forgo your engagement, I am not going to give you up—no, not for ten + thousand roubles of money. I tell you that in advance.” + </p> + <p> + Here he broke off to run to the window and shout to his servant (who was + holding a knife in one hand and a crust of bread and a piece of sturgeon + in the other—he had contrived to filch the latter while fumbling in + the britchka for something else): + </p> + <p> + “Hi, Porphyri! Bring here that puppy, you rascal! What a puppy it is! + Unfortunately that thief of a landlord has given it nothing to eat, even + though I have promised him the roan filly which, as you may remember, I + swopped from Khvostirev.” As a matter of fact, Chichikov had never in his + life seen either Khvostirev or the roan filly. + </p> + <p> + “Barin, do you wish for anything to eat?” inquired the landlady as she + entered. + </p> + <p> + “No, nothing at all. Ah, friend Chichikov, what times we had! Yes, give me + a glass of vodka, old woman. What sort do you keep?” + </p> + <p> + “Aniseed.” + </p> + <p> + “Then bring me a glass of it,” repeated Nozdrev. + </p> + <p> + “And one for me as well,” added the flaxen-haired man. + </p> + <p> + “At the theatre,” went on Nozdrev, “there was an actress who sang like a + canary. Kuvshinnikov, who happened to be sitting with me, said: ‘My boy, + you had better go and gather that strawberry.’ As for the booths at the + fair, they numbered, I should say, fifty.” At this point he broke off to + take the glass of vodka from the landlady, who bowed low in + acknowledgement of his doing so. At the same moment Porphyri—a + fellow dressed like his master (that is to say, in a greasy, wadded + overcoat)—entered with the puppy. + </p> + <p> + “Put the brute down here,” commanded Nozdrev, “and then fasten it up.” + </p> + <p> + Porphyri deposited the animal upon the floor; whereupon it proceeded to + act after the manner of dogs. + </p> + <p> + “THERE’S a puppy for you!” cried Nozdrev, catching hold of it by the back, + and lifting it up. The puppy uttered a piteous yelp. + </p> + <p> + “I can see that you haven’t done what I told you to do,” he continued to + Porphyri after an inspection of the animal’s belly. “You have quite + forgotten to brush him.” + </p> + <p> + “I DID brush him,” protested Porphyri. + </p> + <p> + “Then where did these fleas come from?” + </p> + <p> + “I cannot think. Perhaps they have leapt into his coat out of the + britchka.” + </p> + <p> + “You liar! As a matter of fact, you have forgotten to brush him. + Nevertheless, look at these ears, Chichikov. Just feel them.” + </p> + <p> + “Why should I? Without doing that, I can see that he is well-bred.” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless, catch hold of his ears and feel them.” + </p> + <p> + To humour the fellow Chichikov did as he had requested, remarking: “Yes, + he seems likely to turn out well.” + </p> + <p> + “And feel the coldness of his nose! Just take it in your hand.” + </p> + <p> + Not wishing to offend his interlocutor, Chichikov felt the puppy’s nose, + saying: “Some day he will have an excellent scent.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, will he not? ’Tis the right sort of muzzle for that. I must say that + I have long been wanting such a puppy. Porphyri, take him away again.” + </p> + <p> + Porphyri lifted up the puppy, and bore it downstairs. + </p> + <p> + “Look here, Chichikov,” resumed Nozdrev. “You MUST come to my place. It + lies only five versts away, and we can go there like the wind, and you can + visit Sobakevitch afterwards.” + </p> + <p> + “Shall I, or shall I not, go to Nozdrev’s?” reflected Chichikov. “Is he + likely to prove any more useful than the rest? Well, at least he is as + promising, even though he has lost so much at play. But he has a head on + his shoulders, and therefore I must go carefully if I am to tackle him + concerning my scheme.” + </p> + <p> + With that he added aloud: “Very well, I WILL come with you, but do not let + us be long, for my time is very precious.” + </p> + <p> + “That’s right, that’s right!” cried Nozdrev. “Splendid, splendid! Let me + embrace you!” And he fell upon Chichikov’s neck. “All three of us will + go.” + </p> + <p> + “No, no,” put in the flaxen-haired man. “You must excuse me, for I must be + off home.” + </p> + <p> + “Rubbish, rubbish! I am NOT going to excuse you.” + </p> + <p> + “But my wife will be furious with me. You and Monsieur Chichikov must + change into the other britchka.” + </p> + <p> + “Come, come! The thing is not to be thought of.” + </p> + <p> + The flaxen-haired man was one of those people in whose character, at first + sight, there seems to lurk a certain grain of stubbornness—so much + so that, almost before one has begun to speak, they are ready to dispute + one’s words, and to disagree with anything that may be opposed to their + peculiar form of opinion. For instance, they will decline to have folly + called wisdom, or any tune danced to but their own. Always, however, will + there become manifest in their character a soft spot, and in the end they + will accept what hitherto they have denied, and call what is foolish + sensible, and even dance—yes, better than any one else will do—to + a tune set by some one else. In short, they generally begin well, but + always end badly. + </p> + <p> + “Rubbish!” said Nozdrev in answer to a further objection on his + brother-in-law’s part. And, sure enough, no sooner had Nozdrev clapped his + cap upon his head than the flaxen-haired man started to follow him and his + companion. + </p> + <p> + “But the gentleman has not paid for the vodka?” put in the old woman. + </p> + <p> + “All right, all right, good mother. Look here, brother-in-law. Pay her, + will you, for I have not a kopeck left.” + </p> + <p> + “How much?” inquired the brother-in-law. + </p> + <p> + “What, sir? Eighty kopecks, if you please,” replied the old woman. + </p> + <p> + “A lie! Give her half a rouble. That will be quite enough.” + </p> + <p> + “No, it will NOT, barin,” protested the old woman. However, she took the + money gratefully, and even ran to the door to open it for the gentlemen. + As a matter of fact, she had lost nothing by the transaction, since she + had demanded fully a quarter more than the vodka was worth. + </p> + <p> + The travellers then took their seats, and since Chichikov’s britchka kept + alongside the britchka wherein Nozdrev and his brother-in-law were seated, + it was possible for all three men to converse together as they proceeded. + Behind them came Nozdrev’s smaller buggy, with its team of lean stage + horses and Porphyri and the puppy. But inasmuch as the conversation which + the travellers maintained was not of a kind likely to interest the reader, + I might do worse than say something concerning Nozdrev himself, seeing + that he is destined to play no small role in our story. + </p> + <p> + Nozdrev’s face will be familiar to the reader, seeing that every one must + have encountered many such. Fellows of the kind are known as “gay young + sparks,” and, even in their boyhood and school days, earn a reputation for + being bons camarades (though with it all they come in for some hard + knocks) for the reason that their faces evince an element of frankness, + directness, and enterprise which enables them soon to make friends, and, + almost before you have had time to look around, to start addressing you in + the second person singular. Yet, while cementing such friendships for all + eternity, almost always they begin quarrelling the same evening, since, + throughout, they are a loquacious, dissipated, high-spirited, over-showy + tribe. Indeed, at thirty-five Nozdrev was just what he had been an + eighteen and twenty—he was just such a lover of fast living. Nor had + his marriage in any way changed him, and the less so since his wife had + soon departed to another world, and left behind her two children, whom he + did not want, and who were therefore placed in the charge of a + good-looking nursemaid. Never at any time could he remain at home for more + than a single day, for his keen scent could range over scores and scores + of versts, and detect any fair which promised balls and crowds. + Consequently in a trice he would be there—quarrelling, and creating + disturbances over the gaming-table (like all men of his type, he had a + perfect passion for cards) yet playing neither a faultless nor an + over-clean game, since he was both a blunderer and able to indulge in a + large number of illicit cuts and other devices. The result was that the + game often ended in another kind of sport altogether. That is to say, + either he received a good kicking, or he had his thick and very handsome + whiskers pulled; with the result that on certain occasions he returned + home with one of those appendages looking decidedly ragged. Yet his plump, + healthy-looking cheeks were so robustly constituted, and contained such an + abundance of recreative vigour, that a new whisker soon sprouted in place + of the old one, and even surpassed its predecessor. Again (and the + following is a phenomenon peculiar to Russia) a very short time would have + elapsed before once more he would be consorting with the very cronies who + had recently cuffed him—and consorting with them as though nothing + whatsoever had happened—no reference to the subject being made by + him, and they too holding their tongues. + </p> + <p> + In short, Nozdrev was, as it were, a man of incident. Never was he present + at any gathering without some sort of a fracas occurring thereat. Either + he would require to be expelled from the room by gendarmes, or his friends + would have to kick him out into the street. At all events, should neither + of those occurrences take place, at least he did something of a nature + which would not otherwise have been witnessed. That is to say, should he + not play the fool in a buffet to such an extent as to make every one smile, + you may be sure that he was engaged in lying to a degree which at times + abashed even himself. Moreover, the man lied without reason. For instance, + he would begin telling a story to the effect that he possessed a + blue-coated or a red-coated horse; until, in the end, his listeners would + be forced to leave him with the remark, “You are giving us some fine + stuff, old fellow!” Also, men like Nozdrev have a passion for insulting + their neighbours without the least excuse afforded. (For that matter, even + a man of good standing and of respectable exterior—a man with a star + on his breast—may unexpectedly press your hand one day, and begin + talking to you on subjects of a nature to give food for serious thought. + Yet just as unexpectedly may that man start abusing you to your face—and + do so in a manner worthy of a collegiate registrar rather than of a man + who wears a star on his breast and aspires to converse on subjects which + merit reflection. All that one can do in such a case is to stand shrugging + one’s shoulders in amazement.) Well, Nozdrev had just such a weakness. The + more he became friendly with a man, the sooner would he insult him, and be + ready to spread calumnies as to his reputation. Yet all the while he would + consider himself the insulted one’s friend, and, should he meet him again, + would greet him in the most amicable style possible, and say, “You rascal, + why have you given up coming to see me.” Thus, taken all round, Nozdrev + was a person of many aspects and numerous potentialities. In one and the + same breath would he propose to go with you whithersoever you might choose + (even to the very ends of the world should you so require) or to enter + upon any sort of an enterprise with you, or to exchange any commodity for + any other commodity which you might care to name. Guns, horses, dogs, all + were subjects for barter—though not for profit so far as YOU were + concerned. Such traits are mostly the outcome of a boisterous temperament, + as is additionally exemplified by the fact that if at a fair he chanced to + fall in with a simpleton and to fleece him, he would then proceed to buy a + quantity of the very first articles which came to hand—horse-collars, + cigar-lighters, dresses for his nursemaid, foals, raisins, silver ewers, + lengths of holland, wheatmeal, tobacco, revolvers, dried herrings, + pictures, whetstones, crockery, boots, and so forth, until every atom of + his money was exhausted. Yet seldom were these articles conveyed home, + since, as a rule, the same day saw them lost to some more skilful gambler, + in addition to his pipe, his tobacco-pouch, his mouthpiece, his + four-horsed turn-out, and his coachman: with the result that, stripped to + his very shirt, he would be forced to beg the loan of a vehicle from a + friend. + </p> + <p> + Such was Nozdrev. Some may say that characters of his type have become + extinct, that Nozdrevs no longer exist. Alas! such as say this will be + wrong; for many a day must pass before the Nozdrevs will have disappeared + from our ken. Everywhere they are to be seen in our midst—the only + difference between the new and the old being a difference of garments. + Persons of superficial observation are apt to consider that a man clad in + a different coat is quite a different person from what he used to be. + </p> + <p> + To continue. The three vehicles bowled up to the steps of Nozdrev’s house, + and their occupants alighted. But no preparations whatsoever had been made + for the guest’s reception, for on some wooden trestles in the centre of + the dining-room a couple of peasants were engaged in whitewashing the + ceiling and drawling out an endless song as they splashed their stuff + about the floor. Hastily bidding peasants and trestles to be gone, Nozdrev + departed to another room with further instructions. Indeed, so audible was + the sound of his voice as he ordered dinner that Chichikov—who was + beginning to feel hungry once more—was enabled to gather that it + would be at least five o’clock before a meal of any kind would be + available. On his return, Nozdrev invited his companions to inspect his + establishment—even though as early as two o’clock he had to announce + that nothing more was to be seen. + </p> + <p> + The tour began with a view of the stables, where the party saw two mares + (the one a grey, and the other a roan) and a colt; which latter animal, + though far from showy, Nozdrev declared to have cost him ten thousand + roubles. + </p> + <p> + “You NEVER paid ten thousand roubles for the brute!” exclaimed the + brother-in-law. “He isn’t worth even a thousand.” + </p> + <p> + “By God, I DID pay ten thousand!” asserted Nozdrev. + </p> + <p> + “You can swear that as much as you like,” retorted the other. + </p> + <p> + “Will you bet that I did not?” asked Nozdrev, but the brother-in-law + declined the offer. + </p> + <p> + Next, Nozdrev showed his guests some empty stalls where a number of + equally fine animals (so he alleged) had lately stood. Also there was on + view the goat which an old belief still considers to be an indispensable + adjunct to such places, even though its apparent use is to pace up and + down beneath the noses of the horses as though the place belonged to it. + Thereafter the host took his guests to look at a young wolf which he had + got tied to a chain. “He is fed on nothing but raw meat,” he explained, + “for I want him to grow up as fierce as possible.” Then the party + inspected a pond in which there were “fish of such a size that it would + take two men all their time to lift one of them out.” + </p> + <p> + This piece of information was received with renewed incredulity on the + part of the brother-in-law. + </p> + <p> + “Now, Chichikov,” went on Nozdrev, “let me show you a truly magnificent + brace of dogs. The hardness of their muscles will surprise you, and they + have jowls as sharp as needles.” + </p> + <p> + So saying, he led the way to a small, but neatly-built, shed surrounded on + every side with a fenced-in run. Entering this run, the visitors beheld a + number of dogs of all sorts and sizes and colours. In their midst Nozdrev + looked like a father lording it over his family circle. Erecting their + tails—their “stems,” as dog fanciers call those members—the + animals came bounding to greet the party, and fully a score of them laid + their paws upon Chichikov’s shoulders. Indeed, one dog was moved with such + friendliness that, standing on its hind legs, it licked him on the lips, + and so forced him to spit. That done, the visitors duly inspected the + couple already mentioned, and expressed astonishment at their muscles. + True enough, they were fine animals. Next, the party looked at a Crimean + bitch which, though blind and fast nearing her end, had, two years ago, + been a truly magnificent dog. At all events, so said Nozdrev. Next came + another bitch—also blind; then an inspection of the water-mill, + which lacked the spindle-socket wherein the upper stone ought to have been + revolving—“fluttering,” to use the Russian peasant’s quaint + expression. “But never mind,” said Nozdrev. “Let us proceed to the + blacksmith’s shop.” So to the blacksmith’s shop the party proceeded, and + when the said shop had been viewed, Nozdrev said as he pointed to a field: + </p> + <p> + “In this field I have seen such numbers of hares as to render the ground + quite invisible. Indeed, on one occasion I, with my own hands, caught a + hare by the hind legs.” + </p> + <p> + “You never caught a hare by the hind legs with your hands!” remarked the + brother-in-law. + </p> + <p> + “But I DID” reiterated Nozdrev. “However, let me show you the boundary + where my lands come to an end.” + </p> + <p> + So saying, he started to conduct his guests across a field which consisted + mostly of moleheaps, and in which the party had to pick their way between + strips of ploughed land and of harrowed. Soon Chichikov began to feel + weary, for the terrain was so low-lying that in many spots water could be + heard squelching underfoot, and though for a while the visitors watched + their feet, and stepped carefully, they soon perceived that such a course + availed them nothing, and took to following their noses, without either + selecting or avoiding the spots where the mire happened to be deeper or + the reverse. At length, when a considerable distance had been covered, + they caught sight of a boundary-post and a narrow ditch. + </p> + <p> + “That is the boundary,” said Nozdrev. “Everything that you see on this + side of the post is mine, as well as the forest on the other side of it, + and what lies beyond the forest.” + </p> + <p> + “WHEN did that forest become yours?” asked the brother-in-law. “It cannot + be long since you purchased it, for it never USED to be yours.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, it isn’t long since I purchased it,” said Nozdrev. + </p> + <p> + “How long?” + </p> + <p> + “How long? Why, I purchased it three days ago, and gave a pretty sum for + it, as the devil knows!” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed? Why, three days ago you were at the fair?” + </p> + <p> + “Wiseacre! Cannot one be at a fair and buy land at the same time? Yes, I + WAS at the fair, and my steward bought the land in my absence.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, your STEWARD bought it.” The brother-in-law seemed doubtful, and + shook his head. + </p> + <p> + The guests returned by the same route as that by which they had come; + whereafter, on reaching the house, Nozdrev conducted them to his study, + which contained not a trace of the things usually to be found in such + apartments—such things as books and papers. On the contrary, the + only articles to be seen were a sword and a brace of guns—the one + “of them worth three hundred roubles,” and the other “about eight + hundred.” The brother-in-law inspected the articles in question, and then + shook his head as before. Next, the visitors were shown some “real + Turkish” daggers, of which one bore the inadvertent inscription, “Saveli + Sibiriakov <a href="#linknote-19" id="linknoteref-19"><small>19</small></a>, + Master Cutler.” Then came a barrel-organ, on which Nozdrev started to play + some tune or another. For a while the sounds were not wholly unpleasing, + but suddenly something seemed to go wrong, for a mazurka started, to be + followed by “Marlborough has gone to the war,” and to this, again, there + succeeded an antiquated waltz. Also, long after Nozdrev had ceased to turn + the handle, one particularly shrill-pitched pipe which had, throughout, + refused to harmonise with the rest kept up a protracted whistling on its + own account. Then followed an exhibition of tobacco pipes—pipes of + clay, of wood, of meerschaum, pipes smoked and non-smoked; pipes wrapped + in chamois leather and not so wrapped; an amber-mounted hookah (a stake + won at cards) and a tobacco pouch (worked, it was alleged, by some + countess who had fallen in love with Nozdrev at a posthouse, and whose + handiwork Nozdrev averred to constitute the “sublimity of superfluity”—a + term which, in the Nozdrevian vocabulary, purported to signify the acme of + perfection). + </p> + <p> + Finally, after some hors-d’oeuvres of sturgeon’s back, they sat down to + table—the time being then nearly five o’clock. But the meal did not + constitute by any means the best of which Chichikov had ever partaken, + seeing that some of the dishes were overcooked, and others were scarcely + cooked at all. Evidently their compounder had trusted chiefly to + inspiration—she had laid hold of the first thing which had happened + to come to hand. For instance, had pepper represented the nearest article + within reach, she had added pepper wholesale. Had a cabbage chanced to be + so encountered, she had pressed it also into the service. And the same + with milk, bacon, and peas. In short, her rule seemed to have been “Make a + hot dish of some sort, and some sort of taste will result.” For the rest, + Nozdrev drew heavily upon the wine. Even before the soup had been served, + he had poured out for each guest a bumper of port and another of “haut” + sauterne. (Never in provincial towns is ordinary, vulgar sauterne even + procurable.) Next, he called for a bottle of madeira—“as fine a + tipple as ever a field-marshall drank”; but the madeira only burnt the + mouth, since the dealers, familiar with the taste of our landed gentry + (who love “good” madeira) invariably doctor the stuff with copious dashes + of rum and Imperial vodka, in the hope that Russian stomachs will thus be + enabled to carry off the lot. After this bottle Nozdrev called for another + and “a very special” brand—a brand which he declared to consist of a + blend of burgundy and champagne, and of which he poured generous measures + into the glasses of Chichikov and the brother-in-law as they sat to right + and left of him. But since Chichikov noticed that, after doing so, he + added only a scanty modicum of the mixture to his own tumbler, our hero + determined to be cautious, and therefore took advantage of a moment when + Nozdrev had again plunged into conversation and was yet a third time + engaged in refilling his brother-in-law’s glass, to contrive to upset his + (Chichikov’s) glass over his plate. In time there came also to table a + tart of mountain-ashberries—berries which the host declared to + equal, in taste, ripe plums, but which, curiously enough, smacked more of + corn brandy. Next, the company consumed a sort of pasty of which the + precise name has escaped me, but which the host rendered differently even + on the second occasion of its being mentioned. The meal over, and the + whole tale of wines tried, the guests still retained their seats—a + circumstance which embarrassed Chichikov, seeing that he had no mind to + propound his pet scheme in the presence of Nozdrev’s brother-in-law, who + was a complete stranger to him. No, that subject called for amicable and + PRIVATE conversation. Nevertheless, the brother-in-law appeared to bode + little danger, seeing that he had taken on board a full cargo, and was now + engaged in doing nothing of a more menacing nature than picking his nose. + At length he himself noticed that he was not altogether in a responsible + condition; wherefore he rose and began to make excuses for departing + homewards, though in a tone so drowsy and lethargic that, to quote the + Russian proverb, he might almost have been “pulling a collar on to a horse + by the clasps.” + </p> + <p> + “No, no!” cried Nozdrev. “I am NOT going to let you go.” + </p> + <p> + “But I MUST go,” replied the brother-in-law. “Don’t try to hinder me. You + are annoying me greatly.” + </p> + <p> + “Rubbish! We are going to play a game of banker.” + </p> + <p> + “No, no. You must play it without me, my friend. My wife is expecting me + at home, and I must go and tell her all about the fair. Yes, I MUST go if + I am to please her. Do not try to detain me.” + </p> + <p> + “Your wife be—! But have you REALLY an important piece of business + with her?” + </p> + <p> + “No, no, my friend. The real reason is that she is a good and trustful + woman, and that she does a great deal for me. The tears spring to my eyes + as I think of it. Do not detain me. As an honourable man I say that I must + go. Of that I do assure you in all sincerity.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, let him go,” put in Chichikov under his breath. “What use will he be + here?” + </p> + <p> + “Very well,” said Nozdrev, “though, damn it, I do not like fellows who + lose their heads.” Then he added to his brother-in-law: “All right, Thetuk + <a href="#linknote-20" id="linknoteref-20"><small>20</small></a>. + Off you go to your wife and your woman’s talk and may the devil go with + you!” + </p> + <p> + “Do not insult me with the term Thetuk,” retorted the brother-in-law. “To + her I owe my life, and she is a dear, good woman, and has shown me much + affection. At the very thought of it I could weep. You see, she will be + asking me what I have seen at the fair, and tell her about it I must, for + she is such a dear, good woman.” + </p> + <p> + “Then off you go to her with your pack of lies. Here is your cap.” + </p> + <p> + “No, good friend, you are not to speak of her like that. By so doing you + offend me greatly—I say that she is a dear, good woman.” + </p> + <p> + “Then run along home to her.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I am just going. Excuse me for having been unable to stay. Gladly + would I have stayed, but really I cannot.” + </p> + <p> + The brother-in-law repeated his excuses again and again without noticing + that he had entered the britchka, that it had passed through the gates, + and that he was now in the open country. Permissibly we may suppose that + his wife succeeded in gleaning from him few details of the fair. + </p> + <p> + “What a fool!” said Nozdrev as, standing by the window, he watched the + departing vehicle. “Yet his off-horse is not such a bad one. For a long + time past I have been wanting to get hold of it. A man like that is simply + impossible. Yes, he is a Thetuk, a regular Thetuk.” + </p> + <p> + With that they repaired to the parlour, where, on Porphyri bringing + candles, Chichikov perceived that his host had produced a pack of cards. + </p> + <p> + “I tell you what,” said Nozdrev, pressing the sides of the pack together, + and then slightly bending them, so that the pack cracked and a card flew + out. “How would it be if, to pass the time, I were to make a bank of three + hundred?” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov pretended not to have heard him, but remarked with an air of + having just recollected a forgotten point: + </p> + <p> + “By the way, I had omitted to say that I have a request to make of you.” + </p> + <p> + “What request?” + </p> + <p> + “First give me your word that you will grant it.” + </p> + <p> + “What is the request, I say?” + </p> + <p> + “Then you give me your word, do you?” + </p> + <p> + “Certainly.” + </p> + <p> + “Your word of honour?” + </p> + <p> + “My word of honour.” + </p> + <p> + “This, then, is my request. I presume that you have a large number of dead + serfs whose names have not yet been removed from the revision list?” + </p> + <p> + “I have. But why do you ask?” + </p> + <p> + “Because I want you to make them over to me.” + </p> + <p> + “Of what use would they be to you?” + </p> + <p> + “Never mind. I have a purpose in wanting them.” + </p> + <p> + “What purpose?” + </p> + <p> + “A purpose which is strictly my own affair. In short, I need them.” + </p> + <p> + “You seem to have hatched a very fine scheme. Out with it, now! What is in + the wind?” + </p> + <p> + “How could I have hatched such a scheme as you say? One could not very + well hatch a scheme out of such a trifle as this.” + </p> + <p> + “Then for what purpose do you want the serfs?” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, the curiosity of the man! He wants to poke his fingers into and smell + over every detail!” + </p> + <p> + “Why do you decline to say what is in your mind? At all events, until you + DO say I shall not move in the matter.” + </p> + <p> + “But how would it benefit you to know what my plans are? A whim has seized + me. That is all. Nor are you playing fair. You have given me your word of + honour, yet now you are trying to back out of it.” + </p> + <p> + “No matter what you desire me to do, I decline to do it until you have + told me your purpose.” + </p> + <p> + “What am I to say to the fellow?” thought Chichikov. He reflected for a + moment, and then explained that he wanted the dead souls in order to + acquire a better standing in society, since at present he possessed little + landed property, and only a handful of serfs. + </p> + <p> + “You are lying,” said Nozdrev without even letting him finish. “Yes, you + are lying my good friend.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov himself perceived that his device had been a clumsy one, and his + pretext weak. “I must tell him straight out,” he said to himself as he + pulled his wits together. + </p> + <p> + “Should I tell you the truth,” he added aloud, “I must beg of you not to + repeat it. The truth is that I am thinking of getting married. But, + unfortunately, my betrothed’s father and mother are very ambitious people, + and do not want me to marry her, since they desire the bridegroom to own + not less than three hundred souls, whereas I own but a hundred and fifty, + and that number is not sufficient.” + </p> + <p> + “Again you are lying,” said Nozdrev. + </p> + <p> + “Then look here; I have been lying only to this extent.” And Chichikov + marked off upon his little finger a minute portion. + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless I will bet my head that you have been lying throughout.” + </p> + <p> + “Come, come! That is not very civil of you. Why should I have been lying?” + </p> + <p> + “Because I know you, and know that you are a regular skinflint. I say that + in all friendship. If I possessed any power over you I should hang you to + the nearest tree.” + </p> + <p> + This remark hurt Chichikov, for at any time he disliked expressions gross + or offensive to decency, and never allowed any one—no, not even + persons of the highest rank—to behave towards him with an undue + measure of familiarity. Consequently his sense of umbrage on the present + occasion was unbounded. + </p> + <p> + “By God, I WOULD hang you!” repeated Nozdrev. “I say this frankly, and not + for the purpose of offending you, but simply to communicate to you my + friendly opinion.” + </p> + <p> + “To everything there are limits,” retorted Chichikov stiffly. “If you want + to indulge in speeches of that sort you had better return to the + barracks.” + </p> + <p> + However, after a pause he added: + </p> + <p> + “If you do not care to give me the serfs, why not SELL them?” + </p> + <p> + “SELL them? <i>I</i> know you, you rascal! You wouldn’t give me very much + for them, WOULD you?” + </p> + <p> + “A nice fellow! Look here. What are they to you? So many diamonds, eh?” + </p> + <p> + “I thought so! <i>I</i> know you!” + </p> + <p> + “Pardon me, but I could wish that you were a member of the Jewish + persuasion. You would give them to me fast enough then.” + </p> + <p> + “On the contrary, to show you that I am not a usurer, I will decline to + ask of you a single kopeck for the serfs. All that you need do is to buy + that colt of mine, and then I will throw in the serfs in addition.” + </p> + <p> + “But what should <i>I</i> want with your colt?” said Chichikov, genuinely + astonished at the proposal. + </p> + <p> + “What should YOU want with him? Why, I have bought him for ten thousand + roubles, and am ready to let you have him for four.” + </p> + <p> + “I ask you again: of what use could the colt possibly be to me? I am not + the keeper of a breeding establishment.” + </p> + <p> + “Ah! I see that you fail to understand me. Let me suggest that you pay + down at once three thousand roubles of the purchase money, and leave the + other thousand until later.” + </p> + <p> + “But I do not mean to buy the colt, damn him!” + </p> + <p> + “Then buy the roan mare.” + </p> + <p> + “No, nor the roan mare.” + </p> + <p> + “Then you shall have both the mare and the grey horse which you have seen + in my stables for two thousand roubles.” + </p> + <p> + “I require no horses at all.” + </p> + <p> + “But you would be able to sell them again. You would be able to get thrice + their purchase price at the very first fair that was held.” + </p> + <p> + “Then sell them at that fair yourself, seeing that you are so certain of + making a triple profit.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, I should make it fast enough, only I want YOU to benefit by the + transaction.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov duly thanked his interlocutor, but continued to decline either + the grey horse or the roan mare. + </p> + <p> + “Then buy a few dogs,” said Nozdrev. “I can sell you a couple of hides + a-quiver, ears well pricked, coats like quills, ribs barrel-shaped, and + paws so tucked up as scarcely to graze the ground when they run.” + </p> + <p> + “Of what use would those dogs be to me? I am not a sportsman.” + </p> + <p> + “But I WANT you to have the dogs. Listen. If you won’t have the dogs, then + buy my barrel-organ. ’Tis a splendid instrument. As a man of honour I can + tell you that, when new, it cost me fifteen hundred roubles. Well, you + shall have it for nine hundred.” + </p> + <p> + “Come, come! What should I want with a barrel-organ? I am not a German, to + go hauling it about the roads and begging for coppers.” + </p> + <p> + “But this is quite a different kind of organ from the one which Germans + take about with them. You see, it is a REAL organ. Look at it for + yourself. It is made of the best wood. I will take you to have another + view of it.” + </p> + <p> + And seizing Chichikov by the hand, Nozdrev drew him towards the other + room, where, in spite of the fact that Chichikov, with his feet planted + firmly on the floor, assured his host, again and again, that he knew + exactly what the organ was like, he was forced once more to hear how + Marlborough went to the war. + </p> + <p> + “Then, since you don’t care to give me any money for it,” persisted + Nozdrev, “listen to the following proposal. I will give you the + barrel-organ and all the dead souls which I possess, and in return you + shall give me your britchka, and another three hundred roubles into the + bargain.” + </p> + <p> + “Listen to the man! In that case, what should I have left to drive in?” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, I would stand you another britchka. Come to the coach-house, and I + will show you the one I mean. It only needs repainting to look a perfectly + splendid britchka.” + </p> + <p> + “The ramping, incorrigible devil!” thought Chichikov to himself as at all + hazards he resolved to escape from britchkas, organs, and every species of + dog, however marvellously barrel-ribbed and tucked up of paw. + </p> + <p> + “And in exchange, you shall have the britchka, the barrel-organ, and the + dead souls,” repeated Nozdrev. + </p> + <p> + “I must decline the offer,” said Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “And why?” + </p> + <p> + “Because I don’t WANT the things—I am full up already.” + </p> + <p> + “I can see that you don’t know how things should be done between good + friends and comrades. Plainly you are a man of two faces.” + </p> + <p> + “What do you mean, you fool? Think for yourself. Why should I acquire + articles which I don’t want?” + </p> + <p> + “Say no more about it, if you please. I have quite taken your measure. But + see here. Should you care to play a game of banker? I am ready to stake + both the dead souls and the barrel-organ at cards.” + </p> + <p> + “No; to leave an issue to cards means to submit oneself to the unknown,” + said Chichikov, covertly glancing at the pack which Nozdrev had got in his + hands. Somehow the way in which his companion had cut that pack seemed to + him suspicious. + </p> + <p> + “Why ‘to the unknown’?” asked Nozdrev. “There is no such thing as ‘the + unknown.’ Should luck be on your side, you may win the devil knows what a + haul. Oh, luck, luck!” he went on, beginning to deal, in the hope of + raising a quarrel. “Here is the cursed nine upon which, the other night, I + lost everything. All along I knew that I should lose my money. Said I to + myself: ‘The devil take you, you false, accursed card!’” + </p> + <p> + Just as Nozdrev uttered the words Porphyri entered with a fresh bottle of + liquor; but Chichikov declined either to play or to drink. + </p> + <p> + “Why do you refuse to play?” asked Nozdrev. + </p> + <p> + “Because I feel indisposed to do so. Moreover, I must confess that I am no + great hand at cards.” + </p> + <p> + “WHY are you no great hand at them?” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov shrugged his shoulders. “Because I am not,” he replied. + </p> + <p> + “You are no great hand at ANYTHING, I think.” + </p> + <p> + “What does that matter? God has made me so.” + </p> + <p> + “The truth is that you are a Thetuk, and nothing else. Once upon a time I + believed you to be a good fellow, but now I see that you don’t understand + civility. One cannot speak to you as one would to an intimate, for there + is no frankness or sincerity about you. You are a regular Sobakevitch—just + such another as he.” + </p> + <p> + “For what reason are you abusing me? Am I in any way at fault for + declining to play cards? Sell me those souls if you are the man to + hesitate over such rubbish.” + </p> + <p> + “The foul fiend take you! I was about to have given them to you for + nothing, but now you shan’t have them at all—not if you offer me + three kingdoms in exchange. Henceforth I will have nothing to do with you, + you cobbler, you dirty blacksmith! Porphyri, go and tell the ostler to + give the gentleman’s horses no oats, but only hay.” + </p> + <p> + This development Chichikov had hardly expected. + </p> + <p> + “And do you,” added Nozdrev to his guest, “get out of my sight.” + </p> + <p> + Yet in spite of this, host and guest took supper together—even + though on this occasion the table was adorned with no wines of fictitious + nomenclature, but only with a bottle which reared its solitary head beside + a jug of what is usually known as vin ordinaire. When supper was over + Nozdrev said to Chichikov as he conducted him to a side room where a bed + had been made up: + </p> + <p> + “This is where you are to sleep. I cannot very well wish you good-night.” + </p> + <p> + Left to himself on Nozdrev’s departure, Chichikov felt in a most + unenviable frame of mind. Full of inward vexation, he blamed himself + bitterly for having come to see this man and so wasted valuable time; but + even more did he blame himself for having told him of his scheme—for + having acted as carelessly as a child or a madman. Of a surety the scheme + was not one which ought to have been confided to a man like Nozdrev, for + he was a worthless fellow who might lie about it, and append additions to + it, and spread such stories as would give rise to God knows what scandals. + “This is indeed bad!” Chichikov said to himself. “I have been an absolute + fool.” Consequently he spent an uneasy night—this uneasiness being + increased by the fact that a number of small, but vigorous, insects so + feasted upon him that he could do nothing but scratch the spots and + exclaim, “The devil take you and Nozdrev alike!” Only when morning was + approaching did he fall asleep. On rising, he made it his first business + (after donning dressing-gown and slippers) to cross the courtyard to the + stable, for the purpose of ordering Selifan to harness the britchka. Just + as he was returning from his errand he encountered Nozdrev, clad in a + dressing-gown, and holding a pipe between his teeth. + </p> + <p> + Host and guest greeted one another in friendly fashion, and Nozdrev + inquired how Chichikov had slept. + </p> + <p> + “Fairly well,” replied Chichikov, but with a touch of dryness in his tone. + </p> + <p> + “The same with myself,” said Nozdrev. “The truth is that such a lot of + nasty brutes kept crawling over me that even to speak of it gives me the + shudders. Likewise, as the effect of last night’s doings, a whole squadron + of soldiers seemed to be camping on my chest, and giving me a flogging. + Ugh! And whom also do you think I saw in a dream? You would never guess. + Why, it was Staff-Captain Potsieluev and Lieutenant Kuvshinnikov!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” though Chichikov to himself, “and I wish that they too would give + you a public thrashing!” + </p> + <p> + “I felt so ill!” went on Nozdrev. “And just after I had fallen asleep + something DID come and sting me. Probably it was a party of hag fleas. + Now, dress yourself, and I will be with you presently. First of all I must + give that scoundrel of a bailiff a wigging.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov departed to his own room to wash and dress; which process + completed, he entered the dining-room to find the table laid with + tea-things and a bottle of rum. Clearly no broom had yet touched the + place, for there remained traces of the previous night’s dinner and supper + in the shape of crumbs thrown over the floor and tobacco ash on the + tablecloth. The host himself, when he entered, was still clad in a + dressing-gown exposing a hairy chest; and as he sat holding his pipe in + his hand, and drinking tea from a cup, he would have made a model for the + sort of painter who prefers to portray gentlemen of the less curled and + scented order. + </p> + <p> + “What think you?” he asked of Chichikov after a short silence. “Are you + willing NOW to play me for those souls?” + </p> + <p> + “I have told you that I never play cards. If the souls are for sale, I + will buy them.” + </p> + <p> + “I decline to sell them. Such would not be the course proper between + friends. But a game of banker would be quite another matter. Let us deal + the cards.” + </p> + <p> + “I have told you that I decline to play.” + </p> + <p> + “And you will not agree to an exchange?” + </p> + <p> + “No.” + </p> + <p> + “Then look here. Suppose we play a game of chess. If you win, the souls + shall be yours. There are lots which I should like to see crossed off the + revision list. Hi, Porphyri! Bring me the chessboard.” + </p> + <p> + “You are wasting your time. I will play neither chess nor cards.” + </p> + <p> + “But chess is different from playing with a bank. In chess there can be + neither luck nor cheating, for everything depends upon skill. In fact, I + warn you that I cannot possibly play with you unless you allow me a move + or two in advance.” + </p> + <p> + “The same with me,” thought Chichikov. “Shall I, or shall I not, play this + fellow? I used not to be a bad chess-player, and it is a sport in which he + would find it more difficult to be up to his tricks.” + </p> + <p> + “Very well,” he added aloud. “I WILL play you at chess.” + </p> + <p> + “And stake the souls for a hundred roubles?” asked Nozdrev. + </p> + <p> + “No. Why for a hundred? Would it not be sufficient to stake them for + fifty?” + </p> + <p> + “No. What would be the use of fifty? Nevertheless, for the hundred roubles + I will throw in a moderately old puppy, or else a gold seal and + watch-chain.” + </p> + <p> + “Very well,” assented Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Then how many moves are you going to allow me?” + </p> + <p> + “Is THAT to be part of the bargain? Why, none, of course.” + </p> + <p> + “At least allow me two.” + </p> + <p> + “No, none. I myself am only a poor player.” + </p> + <p> + “<i>I</i> know you and your poor play,” said Nozdrev, moving a chessman. + </p> + <p> + “In fact, it is a long time since last I had a chessman in my hand,” + replied Chichikov, also moving a piece. + </p> + <p> + “Ah! <i>I</i> know you and your poor play,” repeated Nozdrev, moving a + second chessman. + </p> + <p> + “I say again that it is a long time since last I had a chessman in my + hand.” And Chichikov, in his turn, moved. + </p> + <p> + “Ah! <i>I</i> know you and your poor play,” repeated Nozdrev, for the + third time as he made a third move. At the same moment the cuff of one of + his sleeves happened to dislodge another chessman from its position. + </p> + <p> + “Again, I say,” said Chichikov, “that ’tis a long time since last—But + hi! look here! Put that piece back in its place!” + </p> + <p> + “What piece?” + </p> + <p> + “This one.” And almost as Chichikov spoke he saw a third chessman coming + into view between the queens. God only knows whence that chessman had + materialised. + </p> + <p> + “No, no!” shouted Chichikov as he rose from the table. “It is impossible + to play with a man like you. People don’t move three pieces at once.” + </p> + <p> + “How ‘three pieces’? All that I have done is to make a mistake—to + move one of my pieces by accident. If you like, I will forfeit it to you.” + </p> + <p> + “And whence has the third piece come?” + </p> + <p> + “What third piece?” + </p> + <p> + “The one now standing between the queens?” + </p> + <p> + “’Tis one of your own pieces. Surely you are forgetting?” + </p> + <p> + “No, no, my friend. I have counted every move, and can remember each one. + That piece has only just become added to the board. Put it back in its + place, I say.” + </p> + <p> + “Its place? Which IS its place?” But Nozdrev had reddened a good deal. “I + perceive you to be a strategist at the game.” + </p> + <p> + “No, no, good friend. YOU are the strategist—though an unsuccessful + one, as it happens.” + </p> + <p> + “Then of what are you supposing me capable? Of cheating you?” + </p> + <p> + “I am not supposing you capable of anything. All that I say is that I will + not play with you any more.” + </p> + <p> + “But you can’t refuse to,” said Nozdrev, growing heated. “You see, the + game has begun.” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless, I have a right not to continue it, seeing that you are not + playing as an honest man should do.” + </p> + <p> + “You are lying—you cannot truthfully say that.” + </p> + <p> + “’Tis you who are lying.” + </p> + <p> + “But I have NOT cheated. Consequently you cannot refuse to play, but must + continue the game to a finish.” + </p> + <p> + “You cannot force me to play,” retorted Chichikov coldly as, turning to + the chessboard, he swept the pieces into confusion. + </p> + <p> + Nozdrev approached Chichikov with a manner so threatening that the other + fell back a couple of paces. + </p> + <p> + “I WILL force you to play,” said Nozdrev. “It is no use you making a mess + of the chessboard, for I can remember every move. We will replace the + chessmen exactly as they were.” + </p> + <p> + “No, no, my friend. The game is over, and I play you no more.” + </p> + <p> + “You say that you will not?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes. Surely you can see for yourself that such a thing is impossible?” + </p> + <p> + “That cock won’t fight. Say at once that you refuse to play with me.” And + Nozdrev approached a step nearer. + </p> + <p> + “Very well; I DO say that,” replied Chichikov, and at the same moment + raised his hands towards his face, for the dispute was growing heated. Nor + was the act of caution altogether unwarranted, for Nozdrev also raised his + fist, and it may be that one of our hero’s plump, pleasant-looking cheeks + would have sustained an indelible insult had not he (Chichikov) parried + the blow and, seizing Nozdrev by his whirling arms, held them fast. + </p> + <p> + “Porphyri! Pavlushka!” shouted Nozdrev as madly he strove to free himself. + </p> + <p> + On hearing the words, Chichikov, both because he wished to avoid rendering + the servants witnesses of the unedifying scene and because he felt that it + would be of no avail to hold Nozdrev any longer, let go of the latter’s + arms; but at the same moment Porphyri and Pavlushka entered the room—a + pair of stout rascals with whom it would be unwise to meddle. + </p> + <p> + “Do you, or do you not, intend to finish the game?” said Nozdrev. “Give me + a direct answer.” + </p> + <p> + “No; it will not be possible to finish the game,” replied Chichikov, + glancing out of the window. He could see his britchka standing ready for + him, and Selifan evidently awaiting orders to draw up to the entrance + steps. But from the room there was no escape, since in the doorway was + posted the couple of well-built serving-men. + </p> + <p> + “Then it is as I say? You refuse to finish the game?” repeated Nozdrev, + his face as red as fire. + </p> + <p> + “I would have finished it had you played like a man of honour. But, as it + is, I cannot.” + </p> + <p> + “You cannot, eh, you villain? You find that you cannot as soon as you find + that you are not winning? Thrash him, you fellows!” And as he spoke + Nozdrev grasped the cherrywood shank of his pipe. Chichikov turned as + white as a sheet. He tried to say something, but his quivering lips + emitted no sound. “Thrash him!” again shouted Nozdrev as he rushed forward + in a state of heat and perspiration more proper to a warrior who is + attacking an impregnable fortress. “Thrash him!” again he shouted in a + voice like that of some half-demented lieutenant whose desperate bravery + has acquired such a reputation that orders have had to be issued that his + hands shall be held lest he attempt deeds of over-presumptuous daring. + Seized with the military spirit, however, the lieutenant’s head begins to + whirl, and before his eye there flits the image of Suvorov <a + href="#linknote-21" id="linknoteref-21"><small>21</small></a>. + He advances to the great encounter, and impulsively cries, “Forward, my + sons!”—cries it without reflecting that he may be spoiling the plan + of the general attack, that millions of rifles may be protruding their + muzzles through the embrasures of the impregnable, towering walls of the + fortress, that his own impotent assault may be destined to be dissipated + like dust before the wind, and that already there may have been launched + on its whistling career the bullet which is to close for ever his + vociferous throat. However, if Nozdrev resembled the headstrong, desperate + lieutenant whom we have just pictured as advancing upon a fortress, at + least the fortress itself in no way resembled the impregnable stronghold + which I have described. As a matter of fact, the fortress became seized + with a panic which drove its spirit into its boots. First of all, the + chair with which Chichikov (the fortress in question) sought to defend + himself was wrested from his grasp by the serfs, and then—blinking + and neither alive nor dead—he turned to parry the Circassian + pipe-stem of his host. In fact, God only knows what would have happened + had not the fates been pleased by a miracle to deliver Chichikov’s elegant + back and shoulders from the onslaught. Suddenly, and as unexpectedly as + though the sound had come from the clouds, there made itself heard the + tinkling notes of a collar-bell, and then the rumble of wheels approaching + the entrance steps, and, lastly, the snorting and hard breathing of a team + of horses as a vehicle came to a standstill. Involuntarily all present + glanced through the window, and saw a man clad in a semi-military + greatcoat leap from a buggy. After making an inquiry or two in the hall, + he entered the dining-room just at the juncture when Chichikov, almost + swooning with terror, had found himself placed in about as awkward a + situation as could well befall a mortal man. + </p> + <p> + “Kindly tell me which of you is Monsieur Nozdrev?” said the unknown with a + glance of perplexity both at the person named (who was still standing with + pipe-shank upraised) and at Chichikov (who was just beginning to recover + from his unpleasant predicament). + </p> + <p> + “Kindly tell ME whom I have the honour of addressing?” retorted Nozdrev as + he approached the official. + </p> + <p> + “I am the Superintendent of Rural Police.” + </p> + <p> + “And what do you want?” + </p> + <p> + “I have come to fulfil a commission imposed upon me. That is to say, I + have come to place you under arrest until your case shall have been + decided.” + </p> + <p> + “Rubbish! What case, pray?” + </p> + <p> + “The case in which you involved yourself when, in a drunken condition, and + through the instrumentality of a walking-stick, you offered grave offence + to the person of Landowner Maksimov.” + </p> + <p> + “You lie! To your face I tell you that never in my life have I set eyes + upon Landowner Maksimov.” + </p> + <p> + “Good sir, allow me to represent to you that I am a Government officer. + Speeches like that you may address to your servants, but not to me.” + </p> + <p> + At this point Chichikov, without waiting for Nozdrev’s reply, seized his + cap, slipped behind the Superintendent’s back, rushed out on to the + verandah, sprang into his britchka, and ordered Selifan to drive like the + wind. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0005"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER V + </h3> + <p> + Certainly Chichikov was a thorough coward, for, although the britchka + pursued its headlong course until Nozdrev’s establishment had disappeared + behind hillocks and hedgerows, our hero continued to glance nervously + behind him, as though every moment expecting to see a stern chase begin. + His breath came with difficulty, and when he tried his heart with his + hands he could feel it fluttering like a quail caught in a net. + </p> + <p> + “What a sweat the fellow has thrown me into!” he thought to himself, while + many a dire and forceful aspiration passed through his mind. Indeed, the + expressions to which he gave vent were most inelegant in their nature. But + what was to be done next? He was a Russian and thoroughly aroused. The + affair had been no joke. “But for the Superintendent,” he reflected, “I + might never again have looked upon God’s daylight—I might have + vanished like a bubble on a pool, and left neither trace nor posterity nor + property nor an honourable name for my future offspring to inherit!” (it + seemed that our hero was particularly anxious with regard to his possible + issue). + </p> + <p> + “What a scurvy barin!” mused Selifan as he drove along. “Never have I seen + such a barin. I should like to spit in his face. ’Tis better to allow a + man nothing to eat than to refuse to feed a horse properly. A horse needs + his oats—they are his proper fare. Even if you make a man procure a + meal at his own expense, don’t deny a horse his oats, for he ought always + to have them.” + </p> + <p> + An equally poor opinion of Nozdrev seemed to be cherished also by the + steeds, for not only were the bay and the Assessor clearly out of spirits, + but even the skewbald was wearing a dejected air. True, at home the + skewbald got none but the poorer sorts of oats to eat, and Selifan never + filled his trough without having first called him a villain; but at least + they WERE oats, and not hay—they were stuff which could be chewed + with a certain amount of relish. Also, there was the fact that at + intervals he could intrude his long nose into his companions’ troughs + (especially when Selifan happened to be absent from the stable) and + ascertain what THEIR provender was like. But at Nozdrev’s there had been + nothing but hay! That was not right. All three horses felt greatly + discontented. + </p> + <p> + But presently the malcontents had their reflections cut short in a very + rude and unexpected manner. That is to say, they were brought back to + practicalities by coming into violent collision with a six-horsed vehicle, + while upon their heads descended both a babel of cries from the ladies + inside and a storm of curses and abuse from the coachman. “Ah, you damned + fool!” he vociferated. “I shouted to you loud enough! Draw out, you old + raven, and keep to the right! Are you drunk?” Selifan himself felt + conscious that he had been careless, but since a Russian does not care to + admit a fault in the presence of strangers, he retorted with dignity: “Why + have you run into US? Did you leave your eyes behind you at the last + tavern that you stopped at?” With that he started to back the britchka, in + the hope that it might get clear of the other’s harness; but this would + not do, for the pair were too hopelessly intertwined. Meanwhile the + skewbald snuffed curiously at his new acquaintances as they stood planted + on either side of him; while the ladies in the vehicle regarded the scene + with an expression of terror. One of them was an old woman, and the other + a damsel of about sixteen. A mass of golden hair fell daintily from a + small head, and the oval of her comely face was as shapely as an egg, and + white with the transparent whiteness seen when the hands of a housewife + hold a new-laid egg to the light to let the sun’s rays filter through its + shell. The same tint marked the maiden’s ears where they glowed in the + sunshine, and, in short, what with the tears in her wide-open, arresting + eyes, she presented so attractive a picture that our hero bestowed upon it + more than a passing glance before he turned his attention to the hubbub + which was being raised among the horses and the coachmen. + </p> + <p> + “Back out, you rook of Nizhni Novgorod!” the strangers’ coachman shouted. + Selifan tightened his reins, and the other driver did the same. The horses + stepped back a little, and then came together again—this time + getting a leg or two over the traces. In fact, so pleased did the skewbald + seem with his new friends that he refused to stir from the melee into + which an unforeseen chance had plunged him. Laying his muzzle lovingly + upon the neck of one of his recently-acquired acquaintances, he seemed to + be whispering something in that acquaintance’s ear—and whispering + pretty nonsense, too, to judge from the way in which that confidant kept + shaking his ears. + </p> + <p> + At length peasants from a village which happened to be near the scene of + the accident tackled the mess; and since a spectacle of that kind is to + the Russian muzhik what a newspaper or a club-meeting is to the German, + the vehicles soon became the centre of a crowd, and the village denuded + even of its old women and children. The traces were disentangled, and a + few slaps on the nose forced the skewbald to draw back a little; after + which the teams were straightened out and separated. Nevertheless, either + sheer obstinacy or vexation at being parted from their new friends caused + the strange team absolutely to refuse to move a leg. Their driver laid the + whip about them, but still they stood as though rooted to the spot. At + length the participatory efforts of the peasants rose to an unprecedented + degree of enthusiasm, and they shouted in an intermittent chorus the + advice, “Do you, Andrusha, take the head of the trace horse on the right, + while Uncle Mitai mounts the shaft horse. Get up, Uncle Mitai.” Upon that + the lean, long, and red-bearded Uncle Mitai mounted the shaft horse; in + which position he looked like a village steeple or the winder which is + used to raise water from wells. The coachman whipped up his steeds afresh, + but nothing came of it, and Uncle Mitai had proved useless. “Hold on, hold + on!” shouted the peasants again. “Do you, Uncle Mitai, mount the trace + horse, while Uncle Minai mounts the shaft horse.” Whereupon Uncle Minai—a + peasant with a pair of broad shoulders, a beard as black as charcoal, and + a belly like the huge samovar in which sbiten is brewed for all attending + a local market—hastened to seat himself upon the shaft horse, which + almost sank to the ground beneath his weight. “NOW they will go all + right!” the muzhiks exclaimed. “Lay it on hot, lay it on hot! Give that + sorrel horse the whip, and make him squirm like a koramora <a + href="#linknote-22" id="linknoteref-22"><small>22</small></a>.” + Nevertheless, the affair in no way progressed; wherefore, seeing that + flogging was of no use, Uncles Mitai and Minai BOTH mounted the sorrel, + while Andrusha seated himself upon the trace horse. Then the coachman + himself lost patience, and sent the two Uncles about their business—and + not before it was time, seeing that the horses were steaming in a way that + made it clear that, unless they were first winded, they would never reach + the next posthouse. So they were given a moment’s rest. That done, they + moved off of their own accord! + </p> + <p> + Throughout, Chichikov had been gazing at the young unknown with great + attention, and had even made one or two attempts to enter into + conversation with her: but without success. Indeed, when the ladies + departed, it was as in a dream that he saw the girl’s comely presence, the + delicate features of her face, and the slender outline of her form vanish + from his sight; it was as in a dream that once more he saw only the road, + the britchka, the three horses, Selifan, and the bare, empty fields. + Everywhere in life—yes, even in the plainest, the dingiest ranks of + society, as much as in those which are uniformly bright and presentable—a + man may happen upon some phenomenon which is so entirely different from + those which have hitherto fallen to his lot. Everywhere through the web of + sorrow of which our lives are woven there may suddenly break a clear, + radiant thread of joy; even as suddenly along the street of some poor, + poverty-stricken village which, ordinarily, sees nought but a farm waggon + there may came bowling a gorgeous coach with plated harness, picturesque + horses, and a glitter of glass, so that the peasants stand gaping, and do + not resume their caps until long after the strange equipage has become + lost to sight. Thus the golden-haired maiden makes a sudden, unexpected + appearance in our story, and as suddenly, as unexpectedly, disappears. + Indeed, had it not been that the person concerned was Chichikov, and not + some youth of twenty summers—a hussar or a student or, in general, a + man standing on the threshold of life—what thoughts would not have + sprung to birth, and stirred and spoken, within him; for what a length of + time would he not have stood entranced as he stared into the distance and + forgot alike his journey, the business still to be done, the possibility + of incurring loss through lingering—himself, his vocation, the + world, and everything else that the world contains! + </p> + <p> + But in the present case the hero was a man of middle-age, and of cautious + and frigid temperament. True, he pondered over the incident, but in more + deliberate fashion than a younger man would have done. That is to say, his + reflections were not so irresponsible and unsteady. “She was a comely + damsel,” he said to himself as he opened his snuff-box and took a pinch. + “But the important point is: Is she also a NICE DAMSEL? One thing she has + in her favour—and that is that she appears only just to have left + school, and not to have had time to become womanly in the worser sense. At + present, therefore, she is like a child. Everything in her is simple, and + she says just what she thinks, and laughs merely when she feels inclined. + Such a damsel might be made into anything—or she might be turned + into worthless rubbish. The latter, I surmise, for trudging after her she + will have a fond mother and a bevy of aunts, and so forth—persons + who, within a year, will have filled her with womanishness to the point + where her own father wouldn’t know her. And to that there will be added + pride and affectation, and she will begin to observe established rules, + and to rack her brains as to how, and how much, she ought to talk, and to + whom, and where, and so forth. Every moment will see her growing timorous + and confused lest she be saying too much. Finally, she will develop into a + confirmed prevaricator, and end by marrying the devil knows whom!” + Chichikov paused awhile. Then he went on: “Yet I should like to know who + she is, and who her father is, and whether he is a rich landowner of good + standing, or merely a respectable man who has acquired a fortune in the + service of the Government. Should he allow her, on marriage, a dowry of, + say, two hundred thousand roubles, she will be a very nice catch indeed. + She might even, so to speak, make a man of good breeding happy.” + </p> + <p> + Indeed, so attractively did the idea of the two hundred thousand roubles + begin to dance before his imagination that he felt a twinge of + self-reproach because, during the hubbub, he had not inquired of the + postillion or the coachman who the travellers might be. But soon the sight + of Sobakevitch’s country house dissipated his thoughts, and forced him to + return to his stock subject of reflection. + </p> + <p> + Sobakevitch’s country house and estate were of very fair size, and on each + side of the mansion were expanses of birch and pine forest in two shades + of green. The wooden edifice itself had dark-grey walls and a red-gabled + roof, for it was a mansion of the kind which Russia builds for her + military settlers and for German colonists. A noticeable circumstance was + the fact that the taste of the architect had differed from that of the + proprietor—the former having manifestly been a pedant and desirous + of symmetry, and the latter having wished only for comfort. Consequently + he (the proprietor) had dispensed with all windows on one side of the + mansion, and had caused to be inserted, in their place, only a small + aperture which, doubtless, was intended to light an otherwise dark + lumber-room. Likewise, the architect’s best efforts had failed to cause + the pediment to stand in the centre of the building, since the proprietor + had had one of its four original columns removed. Evidently durability had + been considered throughout, for the courtyard was enclosed by a strong and + very high wooden fence, and both the stables, the coach-house, and the + culinary premises were partially constructed of beams warranted to last + for centuries. Nay, even the wooden huts of the peasantry were wonderful + in the solidity of their construction, and not a clay wall or a carved + pattern or other device was to be seen. Everything fitted exactly into its + right place, and even the draw-well of the mansion was fashioned of the + oakwood usually thought suitable only for mills or ships. In short, + wherever Chichikov’s eye turned he saw nothing that was not free from + shoddy make and well and skilfully arranged. As he approached the entrance + steps he caught sight of two faces peering from a window. One of them was + that of a woman in a mobcap with features as long and as narrow as a + cucumber, and the other that of a man with features as broad and as short + as the Moldavian pumpkins (known as gorlianki) whereof balallaiki—the + species of light, two-stringed instrument which constitutes the pride and + the joy of the gay young fellow of twenty as he sits winking and smiling + at the white-necked, white-bosomed maidens who have gathered to listen to + his low-pitched tinkling—are fashioned. This scrutiny made, both + faces withdrew, and there came out on to the entrance steps a lacquey clad + in a grey jacket and a stiff blue collar. This functionary conducted + Chichikov into the hall, where he was met by the master of the house + himself, who requested his guest to enter, and then led him into the inner + part of the mansion. + </p> + <p> + A covert glance at Sobakevitch showed our hero that his host exactly + resembled a moderate-sized bear. To complete the resemblance, + Sobakevitch’s long frockcoat and baggy trousers were of the precise colour + of a bear’s hide, while, when shuffling across the floor, he made a + criss-cross motion of the legs, and had, in addition, a constant habit of + treading upon his companion’s toes. As for his face, it was of the warm, + ardent tint of a piatok <a href="#linknote-23" id="linknoteref-23"><small>23</small></a>. Persons of this kind—persons + to whose designing nature has devoted not much thought, and in the + fashioning of whose frames she has used no instruments so delicate as a + file or a gimlet and so forth—are not uncommon. Such persons she + merely roughhews. One cut with a hatchet, and there results a nose; + another such cut with a hatchet, and there materialises a pair of lips; + two thrusts with a drill, and there issues a pair of eyes. Lastly, + scorning to plane down the roughness, she sends out that person into the + world, saying: “There is another live creature.” Sobakevitch was just such + a ragged, curiously put together figure—though the above model would + seem to have been followed more in his upper portion than in his lower. + One result was that he seldom turned his head to look at the person with + whom he was speaking, but, rather, directed his eyes towards, say, the + stove corner or the doorway. As host and guest crossed the dining-room + Chichikov directed a second glance at his companion. “He is a bear, and + nothing but a bear,” he thought to himself. And, indeed, the strange + comparison was inevitable. Incidentally, Sobakevitch’s Christian name and + patronymic were Michael Semenovitch. Of his habit of treading upon other + people’s toes Chichikov had become fully aware; wherefore he stepped + cautiously, and, throughout, allowed his host to take the lead. As a + matter of fact, Sobakevitch himself seemed conscious of his failing, for + at intervals he would inquire: “I hope I have not hurt you?” and + Chichikov, with a word of thanks, would reply that as yet he had sustained + no injury. + </p> + <p> + At length they reached the drawing-room, where Sobakevitch pointed to an + armchair, and invited his guest to be seated. Chichikov gazed with + interest at the walls and the pictures. In every such picture there were + portrayed either young men or Greek generals of the type of Movrogordato + (clad in a red uniform and breaches), Kanaris, and others; and all these + heroes were depicted with a solidity of thigh and a wealth of moustache + which made the beholder simply shudder with awe. Among them there were + placed also, according to some unknown system, and for some unknown + reason, firstly, Bagration <a href="#linknote-24" id="linknoteref-24"><small>24</small></a>—tall and thin, and with a + cluster of small flags and cannon beneath him, and the whole set in the + narrowest of frames—and, secondly, the Greek heroine, Bobelina, + whose legs looked larger than do the whole bodies of the drawing-room + dandies of the present day. Apparently the master of the house was himself + a man of health and strength, and therefore liked to have his apartments + adorned with none but folk of equal vigour and robustness. Lastly, in the + window, and suspended cheek by jowl with Bobelina, there hung a cage + whence at intervals there peered forth a white-spotted blackbird. Like + everything else in the apartment, it bore a strong resemblance to + Sobakevitch. When host and guest had been conversing for two minutes or so + the door opened, and there entered the hostess—a tall lady in a cap + adorned with ribands of domestic colouring and manufacture. She entered + deliberately, and held her head as erect as a palm. + </p> + <p> + “This is my wife, Theodulia Ivanovna,” said Sobakevitch. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov approached and took her hand. The fact that she raised it nearly + to the level of his lips apprised him of the circumstance that it had just + been rinsed in cucumber oil. + </p> + <p> + “My dear, allow me to introduce Paul Ivanovitch Chichikov,” added + Sobakevitch. “He has the honour of being acquainted both with our Governor + and with our Postmaster.” + </p> + <p> + Upon this Theodulia Ivanovna requested her guest to be seated, and + accompanied the invitation with the kind of bow usually employed only by + actresses who are playing the role of queens. Next, she took a seat upon + the sofa, drew around her her merino gown, and sat thereafter without + moving an eyelid or an eyebrow. As for Chichikov, he glanced upwards, and + once more caught sight of Kanaris with his fat thighs and interminable + moustache, and of Bobelina and the blackbird. For fully five minutes all + present preserved a complete silence—the only sound audible being + that of the blackbird’s beak against the wooden floor of the cage as the + creature fished for grains of corn. Meanwhile Chichikov again surveyed the + room, and saw that everything in it was massive and clumsy in the highest + degree; as also that everything was curiously in keeping with the master + of the house. For example, in one corner of the apartment there stood a + hazelwood bureau with a bulging body on four grotesque legs—the + perfect image of a bear. Also, the tables and the chairs were of the same + ponderous, unrestful order, and every single article in the room appeared + to be saying either, “I, too, am a Sobakevitch,” or “I am exactly like + Sobakevitch.” + </p> + <p> + “I heard speak of you one day when I was visiting the President of the + Council,” said Chichikov, on perceiving that no one else had a mind to + begin a conversation. “That was on Thursday last. We had a very pleasant + evening.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, on that occasion I was not there,” replied Sobakevitch. + </p> + <p> + “What a nice man he is!” + </p> + <p> + “Who is?” inquired Sobakevitch, gazing into the corner by the stove. + </p> + <p> + “The President of the Local Council.” + </p> + <p> + “Did he seem so to you? True, he is a mason, but he is also the greatest + fool that the world ever saw.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov started a little at this mordant criticism, but soon pulled + himself together again, and continued: + </p> + <p> + “Of course, every man has his weakness. Yet the President seems to be an + excellent fellow.” + </p> + <p> + “And do you think the same of the Governor?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes. Why not?” + </p> + <p> + “Because there exists no greater rogue than he.” + </p> + <p> + “What? The Governor a rogue?” ejaculated Chichikov, at a loss to + understand how the official in question could come to be numbered with + thieves. “Let me say that I should never have guessed it. Permit me also + to remark that his conduct would hardly seem to bear out your opinion—he + seems so gentle a man.” And in proof of this Chichikov cited the purses + which the Governor knitted, and also expatiated on the mildness of his + features. + </p> + <p> + “He has the face of a robber,” said Sobakevitch. “Were you to give him a + knife, and to turn him loose on a turnpike, he would cut your throat for + two kopecks. And the same with the Vice-Governor. The pair are just Gog + and Magog.” + </p> + <p> + “Evidently he is not on good terms with them,” thought Chichikov to + himself. “I had better pass to the Chief of Police, which whom he DOES + seem to be friendly.” Accordingly he added aloud: “For my own part, I + should give the preference to the Head of the Gendarmery. What a frank, + outspoken nature he has! And what an element of simplicity does his + expression contain!” + </p> + <p> + “He is mean to the core,” remarked Sobakevitch coldly. “He will sell you + and cheat you, and then dine at your table. Yes, I know them all, and + every one of them is a swindler, and the town a nest of rascals engaged in + robbing one another. Not a man of the lot is there but would sell Christ. + Yet stay: ONE decent fellow there is—the Public Prosecutor; though + even HE, if the truth be told, is little better than a pig.” + </p> + <p> + After these eulogia Chichikov saw that it would be useless to continue + running through the list of officials—more especially since suddenly + he had remembered that Sobakevitch was not at any time given to commending + his fellow man. + </p> + <p> + “Let us go to luncheon, my dear,” put in Theodulia Ivanovna to her spouse. + </p> + <p> + “Yes; pray come to table,” said Sobakevitch to his guest; whereupon they + consumed the customary glass of vodka (accompanied by sundry snacks of + salted cucumber and other dainties) with which Russians, both in town and + country, preface a meal. Then they filed into the dining-room in the wake + of the hostess, who sailed on ahead like a goose swimming across a pond. + The small dining-table was found to be laid for four persons—the + fourth place being occupied by a lady or a young girl (it would have been + difficult to say which exactly) who might have been either a relative, the + housekeeper, or a casual visitor. Certain persons in the world exist, not + as personalities in themselves, but as spots or specks on the + personalities of others. Always they are to be seen sitting in the same + place, and holding their heads at exactly the same angle, so that one + comes within an ace of mistaking them for furniture, and thinks to oneself + that never since the day of their birth can they have spoken a single + word. + </p> + <p> + “My dear,” said Sobakevitch, “the cabbage soup is excellent.” With that he + finished his portion, and helped himself to a generous measure of niania + <a href="#linknote-25" id="linknoteref-25"><small>25</small></a>—the + dish which follows shtchi and consists of a sheep’s stomach stuffed with + black porridge, brains, and other things. “What niania this is!” he added + to Chichikov. “Never would you get such stuff in a town, where one is + given the devil knows what.” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless the Governor keeps a fair table,” said Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but do you know what all the stuff is MADE OF?” retorted + Sobakevitch. “If you DID know you would never touch it.” + </p> + <p> + “Of course I am not in a position to say how it is prepared, but at least + the pork cutlets and the boiled fish seemed excellent.” + </p> + <p> + “Ah, it might have been thought so; yet I know the way in which such + things are bought in the market-place. They are bought by some rascal of a + cook whom a Frenchman has taught how to skin a tomcat and then serve it up + as hare.” + </p> + <p> + “Ugh! What horrible things you say!” put in Madame. + </p> + <p> + “Well, my dear, that is how things are done, and it is no fault of mine + that it is so. Moreover, everything that is left over—everything + that WE (pardon me for mentioning it) cast into the slop-pail—is + used by such folk for making soup.” + </p> + <p> + “Always at table you begin talking like this!” objected his helpmeet. + </p> + <p> + “And why not?” said Sobakevitch. “I tell you straight that I would not eat + such nastiness, even had I made it myself. Sugar a frog as much as you + like, but never shall it pass MY lips. Nor would I swallow an oyster, for + I know only too well what an oyster may resemble. But have some mutton, + friend Chichikov. It is shoulder of mutton, and very different stuff from + the mutton which they cook in noble kitchens—mutton which has been + kicking about the market-place four days or more. All that sort of cookery + has been invented by French and German doctors, and I should like to hang + them for having done so. They go and prescribe diets and a hunger cure as + though what suits their flaccid German systems will agree with a Russian + stomach! Such devices are no good at all.” Sobakevitch shook his head + wrathfully. “Fellows like those are for ever talking of civilisation. As + if THAT sort of thing was civilisation! Phew!” (Perhaps the speaker’s + concluding exclamation would have been even stronger had he not been + seated at table.) “For myself, I will have none of it. When I eat pork at + a meal, give me the WHOLE pig; when mutton, the WHOLE sheep; when goose, + the WHOLE of the bird. Two dishes are better than a thousand, provided + that one can eat of them as much as one wants.” + </p> + <p> + And he proceeded to put precept into practice by taking half the shoulder + of mutton on to his plate, and then devouring it down to the last morsel + of gristle and bone. + </p> + <p> + “My word!” reflected Chichikov. “The fellow has a pretty good holding + capacity!” + </p> + <p> + “None of it for me,” repeated Sobakevitch as he wiped his hands on his + napkin. “I don’t intend to be like a fellow named Plushkin, who owns eight + hundred souls, yet dines worse than does my shepherd.” + </p> + <p> + “Who is Plushkin?” asked Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “A miser,” replied Sobakevitch. “Such a miser as never you could imagine. + Even convicts in prison live better than he does. And he starves his + servants as well.” + </p> + <p> + “Really?” ejaculated Chichikov, greatly interested. “Should you, then, say + that he has lost many peasants by death?” + </p> + <p> + “Certainly. They keep dying like flies.” + </p> + <p> + “Then how far from here does he reside?” + </p> + <p> + “About five versts.” + </p> + <p> + “Only five versts?” exclaimed Chichikov, feeling his heart beating + joyously. “Ought one, when leaving your gates, to turn to the right or to + the left?” + </p> + <p> + “I should be sorry to tell you the way to the house of such a cur,” said + Sobakevitch. “A man had far better go to hell than to Plushkin’s.” + </p> + <p> + “Quite so,” responded Chichikov. “My only reason for asking you is that it + interests me to become acquainted with any and every sort of locality.” + </p> + <p> + To the shoulder of mutton there succeeded, in turn, cutlets (each one + larger than a plate), a turkey of about the size of a calf, eggs, rice, + pastry, and every conceivable thing which could possibly be put into a + stomach. There the meal ended. When he rose from table Chichikov felt as + though a pood’s weight were inside him. In the drawing-room the company + found dessert awaiting them in the shape of pears, plums, and apples; but + since neither host nor guest could tackle these particular dainties the + hostess removed them to another room. Taking advantage of her absence, + Chichikov turned to Sobakevitch (who, prone in an armchair, seemed, after + his ponderous meal, to be capable of doing little beyond belching and + grunting—each such grunt or belch necessitating a subsequent signing + of the cross over the mouth), and intimated to him a desire to have a + little private conversation concerning a certain matter. At this moment + the hostess returned. + </p> + <p> + “Here is more dessert,” she said. “Pray have a few radishes stewed in + honey.” + </p> + <p> + “Later, later,” replied Sobakevitch. “Do you go to your room, and Paul + Ivanovitch and I will take off our coats and have a nap.” + </p> + <p> + Upon this the good lady expressed her readiness to send for feather beds + and cushions, but her husband expressed a preference for slumbering in an + armchair, and she therefore departed. When she had gone Sobakevitch + inclined his head in an attitude of willingness to listen to Chichikov’s + business. Our hero began in a sort of detached manner—touching + lightly upon the subject of the Russian Empire, and expatiating upon the + immensity of the same, and saying that even the Empire of Ancient Rome had + been of considerably smaller dimensions. Meanwhile Sobakevitch sat with + his head drooping. + </p> + <p> + From that Chichikov went on to remark that, according to the statutes of + the said Russian Empire (which yielded to none in glory—so much so + that foreigners marvelled at it), peasants on the census lists who had + ended their earthly careers were nevertheless, on the rendering of new + lists, returned equally with the living, to the end that the courts might + be relieved of a multitude of trifling, useless emendations which might + complicate the already sufficiently complex mechanism of the State. + Nevertheless, said Chichikov, the general equity of this measure did not + obviate a certain amount of annoyance to landowners, since it forced them + to pay upon a non-living article the tax due upon a living. Hence (our + hero concluded) he (Chichikov) was prepared, owing to the personal respect + which he felt for Sobakevitch, to relieve him, in part, of the irksome + obligation referred to (in passing, it may be said that Chichikov referred + to his principal point only guardedly, for he called the souls which he + was seeking not “dead,” but “non-existent”). + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile Sobakevitch listened with bent head; though something like a + trace of expression dawned in his face as he did so. Ordinarily his body + lacked a soul—or, if he did possess a soul, he seemed to keep it + elsewhere than where it ought to have been; so that, buried beneath + mountains (as it were) or enclosed within a massive shell, its movements + produced no sort of agitation on the surface. + </p> + <p> + “Well?” said Chichikov—though not without a certain tremor of + diffidence as to the possible response. + </p> + <p> + “You are after dead souls?” were Sobakevitch’s perfectly simple words. He + spoke without the least surprise in his tone, and much as though the + conversation had been turning on grain. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” replied Chichikov, and then, as before, softened down the + expression “dead souls.” + </p> + <p> + “They are to be found,” said Sobakevitch. “Why should they not be?” + </p> + <p> + “Then of course you will be glad to get rid of any that you may chance to + have?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I shall have no objection to SELLING them.” At this point the + speaker raised his head a little, for it had struck him that surely the + would-be buyer must have some advantage in view. + </p> + <p> + “The devil!” thought Chichikov to himself. “Here is he selling the goods + before I have even had time to utter a word!” + </p> + <p> + “And what about the price?” he added aloud. “Of course, the articles are + not of a kind very easy to appraise.” + </p> + <p> + “I should be sorry to ask too much,” said Sobakevitch. “How would a + hundred roubles per head suit you?” + </p> + <p> + “What, a hundred roubles per head?” Chichikov stared open-mouthed at his + host—doubting whether he had heard aright, or whether his host’s + slow-moving tongue might not have inadvertently substituted one word for + another. + </p> + <p> + “Yes. Is that too much for you?” said Sobakevitch. Then he added: “What is + your own price?” + </p> + <p> + “My own price? I think that we cannot properly have understood one another—that + you must have forgotten of what the goods consist. With my hand on my + heart do I submit that eight grivni per soul would be a handsome, a VERY + handsome, offer.” + </p> + <p> + “What? Eight grivni?” + </p> + <p> + “In my opinion, a higher offer would be impossible.” + </p> + <p> + “But I am not a seller of boots.” + </p> + <p> + “No; yet you, for your part, will agree that these souls are not live + human beings?” + </p> + <p> + “I suppose you hope to find fools ready to sell you souls on the census + list for a couple of groats apiece?” + </p> + <p> + “Pardon me, but why do you use the term ‘on the census list’? The souls + themselves have long since passed away, and have left behind them only + their names. Not to trouble you with any further discussion of the + subject, I can offer you a rouble and a half per head, but no more.” + </p> + <p> + “You should be ashamed even to mention such a sum! Since you deal in + articles of this kind, quote me a genuine price.” + </p> + <p> + “I cannot, Michael Semenovitch. Believe me, I cannot. What a man cannot + do, that he cannot do.” The speaker ended by advancing another half-rouble + per head. + </p> + <p> + “But why hang back with your money?” said Sobakevitch. “Of a truth I am + not asking much of you. Any other rascal than myself would have cheated + you by selling you old rubbish instead of good, genuine souls, whereas I + should be ready to give you of my best, even were you buying only + nut-kernels. For instance, look at wheelwright Michiev. Never was there + such a one to build spring carts! And his handiwork was not like your + Moscow handiwork—good only for an hour. No, he did it all himself, + even down to the varnishing.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov opened his mouth to remark that, nevertheless, the said Michiev + had long since departed this world; but Sobakevitch’s eloquence had got + too thoroughly into its stride to admit of any interruption. + </p> + <p> + “And look, too, at Probka Stepan, the carpenter,” his host went on. “I + will wager my head that nowhere else would you find such a workman. What a + strong fellow he was! He had served in the Guards, and the Lord only knows + what they had given for him, seeing that he was over three arshins in + height.” + </p> + <p> + Again Chichikov tried to remark that Probka was dead, but Sobakevitch’s + tongue was borne on the torrent of its own verbiage, and the only thing to + be done was to listen. + </p> + <p> + “And Milushkin, the bricklayer! He could build a stove in any house you + liked! And Maksim Teliatnikov, the bootmaker! Anything that he drove his + awl into became a pair of boots—and boots for which you would be + thankful, although he WAS a bit foul of the mouth. And Eremi + Sorokoplechin, too! He was the best of the lot, and used to work at his + trade in Moscow, where he paid a tax of five hundred roubles. Well, + THERE’S an assortment of serfs for you!—a very different assortment + from what Plushkin would sell you!” + </p> + <p> + “But permit me,” at length put in Chichikov, astounded at this flood of + eloquence to which there appeared to be no end. “Permit me, I say, to + inquire why you enumerate the talents of the deceased, seeing that they + are all of them dead, and that therefore there can be no sense in doing + so. ‘A dead body is only good to prop a fence with,’ says the proverb.” + </p> + <p> + “Of course they are dead,” replied Sobakevitch, but rather as though the + idea had only just occurred to him, and was giving him food for thought. + “But tell me, now: what is the use of listing them as still alive? And + what is the use of them themselves? They are flies, not human beings.” + </p> + <p> + “Well,” said Chichikov, “they exist, though only in idea.” + </p> + <p> + “But no—NOT only in idea. I tell you that nowhere else would you + find such a fellow for working heavy tools as was Michiev. He had the + strength of a horse in his shoulders.” And, with the words, Sobakevitch + turned, as though for corroboration, to the portrait of Bagration, as is + frequently done by one of the parties in a dispute when he purports to + appeal to an extraneous individual who is not only unknown to him, but + wholly unconnected with the subject in hand; with the result that the + individual is left in doubt whether to make a reply, or whether to betake + himself elsewhere. + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless, I CANNOT give you more than two roubles per head,” said + Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Well, as I don’t want you to swear that I have asked too much of you and + won’t meet you halfway, suppose, for friendship’s sake, that you pay me + seventy-five roubles in assignats?” + </p> + <p> + “Good heavens!” thought Chichikov to himself. “Does the man take me for a + fool?” Then he added aloud: “The situation seems to me a strange one, for + it is as though we were performing a stage comedy. No other explanation + would meet the case. Yet you appear to be a man of sense, and possessed of + some education. The matter is a very simple one. The question is: what is + a dead soul worth, and is it of any use to any one?” + </p> + <p> + “It is of use to YOU, or you would not be buying such articles.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov bit his lip, and stood at a loss for a retort. He tried to + saying something about “family and domestic circumstances,” but + Sobakevitch cut him short with: + </p> + <p> + “I don’t want to know your private affairs, for I never poke my nose into + such things. You need the souls, and I am ready to sell them. Should you + not buy them, I think you will repent it.” + </p> + <p> + “Two roubles is my price,” repeated Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Come, come! As you have named that sum, I can understand your not liking + to go back upon it; but quote me a bona fide figure.” + </p> + <p> + “The devil fly away with him!” mused Chichikov. “However, I will add + another half-rouble.” And he did so. + </p> + <p> + “Indeed?” said Sobakevitch. “Well, my last word upon it is—fifty + roubles in assignats. That will mean a sheer loss to me, for nowhere else + in the world could you buy better souls than mine.” + </p> + <p> + “The old skinflint!” muttered Chichikov. Then he added aloud, with + irritation in his tone: “See here. This is a serious matter. Any one but + you would be thankful to get rid of the souls. Only a fool would stick to + them, and continue to pay the tax.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but remember (and I say it wholly in a friendly way) that + transactions of this kind are not generally allowed, and that any one + would say that a man who engages in them must have some rather doubtful + advantage in view.” + </p> + <p> + “Have it your own away,” said Chichikov, with assumed indifference. “As a + matter of fact, I am not purchasing for profit, as you suppose, but to + humour a certain whim of mine. Two and a half roubles is the most that I + can offer.” + </p> + <p> + “Bless your heart!” retorted the host. “At least give me thirty roubles in + assignats, and take the lot.” + </p> + <p> + “No, for I see that you are unwilling to sell. I must say good-day to + you.” + </p> + <p> + “Hold on, hold on!” exclaimed Sobakevitch, retaining his guest’s hand, and + at the same moment treading heavily upon his toes—so heavily, + indeed, that Chichikov gasped and danced with the pain. + </p> + <p> + “I BEG your pardon!” said Sobakevitch hastily. “Evidently I have hurt you. + Pray sit down again.” + </p> + <p> + “No,” retorted Chichikov. “I am merely wasting my time, and must be off.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, sit down just for a moment. I have something more agreeable to say.” + And, drawing closer to his guest, Sobakevitch whispered in his ear, as + though communicating to him a secret: “How about twenty-five roubles?” + </p> + <p> + “No, no, no!” exclaimed Chichikov. “I won’t give you even a QUARTER of + that. I won’t advance another kopeck.” + </p> + <p> + For a while Sobakevitch remained silent, and Chichikov did the same. This + lasted for a couple of minutes, and, meanwhile, the aquiline-nosed + Bagration gazed from the wall as though much interested in the bargaining. + </p> + <p> + “What is your outside price?” at length said Sobakevitch. + </p> + <p> + “Two and a half roubles.” + </p> + <p> + “Then you seem to rate a human soul at about the same value as a boiled + turnip. At least give me THREE roubles.” + </p> + <p> + “No, I cannot.” + </p> + <p> + “Pardon me, but you are an impossible man to deal with. However, even + though it will mean a dead loss to me, and you have not shown a very nice + spirit about it, I cannot well refuse to please a friend. I suppose a + purchase deed had better be made out in order to have everything in + order?” + </p> + <p> + “Of course.” + </p> + <p> + “Then for that purpose let us repair to the town.” + </p> + <p> + The affair ended in their deciding to do this on the morrow, and to + arrange for the signing of a deed of purchase. Next, Chichikov requested a + list of the peasants; to which Sobakevitch readily agreed. Indeed, he went + to his writing-desk then and there, and started to indite a list which + gave not only the peasants’ names, but also their late qualifications. + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile Chichikov, having nothing else to do, stood looking at the + spacious form of his host; and as he gazed at his back as broad as that of + a cart horse, and at the legs as massive as the iron standards which adorn + a street, he could not help inwardly ejaculating: + </p> + <p> + “Truly God has endowed you with much! Though not adjusted with nicety, at + least you are strongly built. I wonder whether you were born a bear or + whether you have come to it through your rustic life, with its tilling of + crops and its trading with peasants? Yet no; I believe that, even if you + had received a fashionable education, and had mixed with society, and had + lived in St. Petersburg, you would still have been just the kulak <a href="#linknote-26" id="linknoteref-26"><small>26</small></a> + that you are. The only difference is that circumstances, as they stand, + permit of your polishing off a stuffed shoulder of mutton at a meal; + whereas in St. Petersburg you would have been unable to do so. Also, as + circumstances stand, you have under you a number of peasants, whom you + treat well for the reason that they are your property; whereas, otherwise, + you would have had under you tchinovniks <a href="#linknote-27" id="linknoteref-27"><small>27</small></a>: whom you + would have bullied because they were NOT your property. Also, you would + have robbed the Treasury, since a kulak always remains a money-grubber.” + </p> + <p> + “The list is ready,” said Sobakevitch, turning round. + </p> + <p> + “Indeed? Then please let me look at it.” Chichikov ran his eye over the + document, and could not but marvel at its neatness and accuracy. Not only + were there set forth in it the trade, the age, and the pedigree of every + serf, but on the margin of the sheet were jotted remarks concerning each + serf’s conduct and sobriety. Truly it was a pleasure to look at it. + </p> + <p> + “And do you mind handing me the earnest money?” said Sobakevitch. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I do. Why need that be done? You can receive the money in a lump sum + as soon as we visit the town.” + </p> + <p> + “But it is always the custom, you know,” asserted Sobakevitch. + </p> + <p> + “Then I cannot follow it, for I have no money with me. However, here are + ten roubles.” + </p> + <p> + “Ten roubles, indeed? You might as well hand me fifty while you are about + it.” + </p> + <p> + Once more Chichikov started to deny that he had any money upon him, but + Sobakevitch insisted so strongly that this was not so that at length the + guest pulled out another fifteen roubles, and added them to the ten + already produced. + </p> + <p> + “Kindly give me a receipt for the money,” he added. + </p> + <p> + “A receipt? Why should I give you a receipt?” + </p> + <p> + “Because it is better to do so, in order to guard against mistakes.” + </p> + <p> + “Very well; but first hand me over the money.” + </p> + <p> + “The money? I have it here. Do you write out the receipt, and then the + money shall be yours.” + </p> + <p> + “Pardon me, but how am I to write out the receipt before I have seen the + cash?” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov placed the notes in Sobakevitch’s hand; whereupon the host moved + nearer to the table, and added to the list of serfs a note that he had + received for the peasants, therewith sold, the sum of twenty-five roubles, + as earnest money. This done, he counted the notes once more. + </p> + <p> + “This is a very OLD note,” he remarked, holding one up to the light. + “Also, it is a trifle torn. However, in a friendly transaction one must + not be too particular.” + </p> + <p> + “What a kulak!” thought Chichikov to himself. “And what a brute beast!” + </p> + <p> + “Then you do not want any WOMEN souls?” queried Sobakevitch. + </p> + <p> + “I thank you, no.” + </p> + <p> + “I could let you have some cheap—say, as between friends, at a + rouble a head?” + </p> + <p> + “No, I should have no use for them.” + </p> + <p> + “Then, that being so, there is no more to be said. There is no accounting + for tastes. ‘One man loves the priest, and another the priest’s wife,’ + says the proverb.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov rose to take his leave. “Once more I would request of you,” he + said, “that the bargain be left as it is.” + </p> + <p> + “Of course, of course. What is done between friends holds good because of + their mutual friendship. Good-bye, and thank you for your visit. In + advance I would beg that, whenever you should have an hour or two to + spare, you will come and lunch with us again. Perhaps we might be able to + do one another further service?” + </p> + <p> + “Not if I know it!” reflected Chichikov as he mounted his britchka. “Not + I, seeing that I have had two and a half roubles per soul squeezed out of + me by a brute of a kulak!” + </p> + <p> + Altogether he felt dissatisfied with Sobakevitch’s behaviour. In spite of + the man being a friend of the Governor and the Chief of Police, he had + acted like an outsider in taking money for what was worthless rubbish. As + the britchka left the courtyard Chichikov glanced back and saw Sobakevitch + still standing on the verandah—apparently for the purpose of + watching to see which way the guest’s carriage would turn. + </p> + <p> + “The old villain, to be still standing there!” muttered Chichikov through + his teeth; after which he ordered Selifan to proceed so that the vehicle’s + progress should be invisible from the mansion—the truth being that + he had a mind next to visit Plushkin (whose serfs, to quote Sobakevitch, + had a habit of dying like flies), but not to let his late host learn of + his intention. Accordingly, on reaching the further end of the village, he + hailed the first peasant whom he saw—a man who was in the act of + hoisting a ponderous beam on to his shoulder before setting off with it, + ant-like, to his hut. + </p> + <p> + “Hi!” shouted Chichikov. “How can I reach landowner Plushkin’s place + without first going past the mansion here?” + </p> + <p> + The peasant seemed nonplussed by the question. + </p> + <p> + “Don’t you know?” queried Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “No, barin,” replied the peasant. + </p> + <p> + “What? You don’t know skinflint Plushkin who feeds his people so badly?” + </p> + <p> + “Of course I do!” exclaimed the fellow, and added thereto an + uncomplimentary expression of a species not ordinarily employed in polite + society. We may guess that it was a pretty apt expression, since long + after the man had become lost to view Chichikov was still laughing in his + britchka. And, indeed, the language of the Russian populace is always + forcible in its phraseology. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0006"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER VI + </h3> + <p> + Chichikov’s amusement at the peasant’s outburst prevented him from + noticing that he had reached the centre of a large and populous village; + but, presently, a violent jolt aroused him to the fact that he was driving + over wooden pavements of a kind compared with which the cobblestones of + the town had been as nothing. Like the keys of a piano, the planks kept + rising and falling, and unguarded passage over them entailed either a bump + on the back of the neck or a bruise on the forehead or a bite on the tip + of one’s tongue. At the same time Chichikov noticed a look of decay about + the buildings of the village. The beams of the huts had grown dark with + age, many of their roofs were riddled with holes, others had but a tile of + the roof remaining, and yet others were reduced to the rib-like framework + of the same. It would seem as though the inhabitants themselves had + removed the laths and traverses, on the very natural plea that the huts + were no protection against the rain, and therefore, since the latter + entered in bucketfuls, there was no particular object to be gained by + sitting in such huts when all the time there was the tavern and the + highroad and other places to resort to. + </p> + <p> + Suddenly a woman appeared from an outbuilding—apparently the + housekeeper of the mansion, but so roughly and dirtily dressed as almost + to seem indistinguishable from a man. Chichikov inquired for the master of + the place. + </p> + <p> + “He is not at home,” she replied, almost before her interlocutor had had + time to finish. Then she added: “What do you want with him?” + </p> + <p> + “I have some business to do,” said Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Then pray walk into the house,” the woman advised. Then she turned upon + him a back that was smeared with flour and had a long slit in the lower + portion of its covering. Entering a large, dark hall which reeked like a + tomb, he passed into an equally dark parlour that was lighted only by such + rays as contrived to filter through a crack under the door. When Chichikov + opened the door in question, the spectacle of the untidiness within struck + him almost with amazement. It would seem that the floor was never washed, + and that the room was used as a receptacle for every conceivable kind of + furniture. On a table stood a ragged chair, with, beside it, a clock minus + a pendulum and covered all over with cobwebs. Against a wall leant a + cupboard, full of old silver, glassware, and china. On a writing table, + inlaid with mother-of-pearl which, in places, had broken away and left + behind it a number of yellow grooves (stuffed with putty), lay a pile of + finely written manuscript, an overturned marble press (turning green), an + ancient book in a leather cover with red edges, a lemon dried and shrunken + to the dimensions of a hazelnut, the broken arm of a chair, a tumbler + containing the dregs of some liquid and three flies (the whole covered + over with a sheet of notepaper), a pile of rags, two ink-encrusted pens, + and a yellow toothpick with which the master of the house had picked his + teeth (apparently) at least before the coming of the French to Moscow. As + for the walls, they were hung with a medley of pictures. Among the latter + was a long engraving of a battle scene, wherein soldiers in three-cornered + hats were brandishing huge drums and slender lances. It lacked a glass, + and was set in a frame ornamented with bronze fretwork and bronze corner + rings. Beside it hung a huge, grimy oil painting representative of some + flowers and fruit, half a water melon, a boar’s head, and the pendent form + of a dead wild duck. Attached to the ceiling there was a chandelier in a + holland covering—the covering so dusty as closely to resemble a huge + cocoon enclosing a caterpillar. Lastly, in one corner of the room lay a + pile of articles which had evidently been adjudged unworthy of a place on + the table. Yet what the pile consisted of it would have been difficult to + say, seeing that the dust on the same was so thick that any hand which + touched it would have at once resembled a glove. Prominently protruding + from the pile was the shaft of a wooden spade and the antiquated sole of a + shoe. Never would one have supposed that a living creature had tenanted + the room, were it not that the presence of such a creature was betrayed by + the spectacle of an old nightcap resting on the table. + </p> + <p> + Whilst Chichikov was gazing at this extraordinary mess, a side door opened + and there entered the housekeeper who had met him near the outbuildings. + But now Chichikov perceived this person to be a man rather than a woman, + since a female housekeeper would have had no beard to shave, whereas the + chin of the newcomer, with the lower portion of his cheeks, strongly + resembled the curry-comb which is used for grooming horses. Chichikov + assumed a questioning air, and waited to hear what the housekeeper might + have to say. The housekeeper did the same. At length, surprised at the + misunderstanding, Chichikov decided to ask the first question. + </p> + <p> + “Is the master at home?” he inquired. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” replied the person addressed. + </p> + <p> + “Then where is he?” continued Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Are you blind, my good sir?” retorted the other. “<i>I</i> am the + master.” + </p> + <p> + Involuntarily our hero started and stared. During his travels it had + befallen him to meet various types of men—some of them, it may be, + types which you and I have never encountered; but even to Chichikov this + particular species was new. In the old man’s face there was nothing very + special—it was much like the wizened face of many another dotard, + save that the chin was so greatly projected that whenever he spoke he was + forced to wipe it with a handkerchief to avoid dribbling, and that his + small eyes were not yet grown dull, but twinkled under their overhanging + brows like the eyes of mice when, with attentive ears and sensitive + whiskers, they snuff the air and peer forth from their holes to see + whether a cat or a boy may not be in the vicinity. No, the most noticeable + feature about the man was his clothes. In no way could it have been + guessed of what his coat was made, for both its sleeves and its skirts + were so ragged and filthy as to defy description, while instead of two + posterior tails, there dangled four of those appendages, with, projecting + from them, a torn newspaper. Also, around his neck there was wrapped + something which might have been a stocking, a garter, or a stomacher, but + was certainly not a tie. In short, had Chichikov chanced to encounter him + at a church door, he would have bestowed upon him a copper or two (for, to + do our hero justice, he had a sympathetic heart and never refrained from + presenting a beggar with alms), but in the present case there was standing + before him, not a mendicant, but a landowner—and a landowner + possessed of fully a thousand serfs, the superior of all his neighbours in + wealth of flour and grain, and the owner of storehouses, and so forth, + that were crammed with homespun cloth and linen, tanned and undressed + sheepskins, dried fish, and every conceivable species of produce. + Nevertheless, such a phenomenon is rare in Russia, where the tendency is + rather to prodigality than to parsimony. + </p> + <p> + For several minutes Plushkin stood mute, while Chichikov remained so dazed + with the appearance of the host and everything else in the room, that he + too, could not begin a conversation, but stood wondering how best to find + words in which to explain the object of his visit. For a while he thought + of expressing himself to the effect that, having heard so much of his + host’s benevolence and other rare qualities of spirit, he had considered + it his duty to come and pay a tribute of respect; but presently even HE + came to the conclusion that this would be overdoing the thing, and, after + another glance round the room, decided that the phrase “benevolence and + other rare qualities of spirit” might to advantage give place to “economy + and genius for method.” Accordingly, the speech mentally composed, he said + aloud that, having heard of Plushkin’s talents for thrifty and systematic + management, he had considered himself bound to make the acquaintance of + his host, and to present him with his personal compliments (I need hardly + say that Chichikov could easily have alleged a better reason, had any + better one happened, at the moment, to have come into his head). + </p> + <p> + With toothless gums Plushkin murmured something in reply, but nothing is + known as to its precise terms beyond that it included a statement that the + devil was at liberty to fly away with Chichikov’s sentiments. However, the + laws of Russian hospitality do not permit even of a miser infringing their + rules; wherefore Plushkin added to the foregoing a more civil invitation + to be seated. + </p> + <p> + “It is long since I last received a visitor,” he went on. “Also, I feel + bound to say that I can see little good in their coming. Once introduce + the abominable custom of folk paying calls, and forthwith there will ensue + such ruin to the management of estates that landowners will be forced to + feed their horses on hay. Not for a long, long time have I eaten a meal + away from home—although my own kitchen is a poor one, and has its + chimney in such a state that, were it to become overheated, it would + instantly catch fire.” + </p> + <p> + “What a brute!” thought Chichikov. “I am lucky to have got through so much + pastry and stuffed shoulder of mutton at Sobakevitch’s!” + </p> + <p> + “Also,” went on Plushkin, “I am ashamed to say that hardly a wisp of + fodder does the place contain. But how can I get fodder? My lands are + small, and the peasantry lazy fellows who hate work and think of nothing + but the tavern. In the end, therefore, I shall be forced to go and spend + my old age in roaming about the world.” + </p> + <p> + “But I have been told that you possess over a thousand serfs?” said + Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Who told you that? No matter who it was, you would have been justified in + giving him the lie. He must have been a jester who wanted to make a fool + of you. A thousand souls, indeed! Why, just reckon the taxes on them, and + see what there would be left! For these three years that accursed fever + has been killing off my serfs wholesale.” + </p> + <p> + “Wholesale, you say?” echoed Chichikov, greatly interested. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, wholesale,” replied the old man. + </p> + <p> + “Then might I ask you the exact number?” + </p> + <p> + “Fully eighty.” + </p> + <p> + “Surely not?” + </p> + <p> + “But it is so.” + </p> + <p> + “Then might I also ask whether it is from the date of the last census + revision that you are reckoning these souls?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, damn it! And since that date I have been bled for taxes upon a + hundred and twenty souls in all.” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed? Upon a hundred and twenty souls in all!” And Chichikov’s surprise + and elation were such that, this said, he remained sitting open-mouthed. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, good sir,” replied Plushkin. “I am too old to tell you lies, for I + have passed my seventieth year.” + </p> + <p> + Somehow he seemed to have taken offence at Chichikov’s almost joyous + exclamation; wherefore the guest hastened to heave a profound sigh, and to + observe that he sympathised to the full with his host’s misfortunes. + </p> + <p> + “But sympathy does not put anything into one’s pocket,” retorted Plushkin. + “For instance, I have a kinsman who is constantly plaguing me. He is a + captain in the army, damn him, and all day he does nothing but call me + ‘dear uncle,’ and kiss my hand, and express sympathy until I am forced to + stop my ears. You see, he has squandered all his money upon his + brother-officers, as well as made a fool of himself with an actress; so + now he spends his time in telling me that he has a sympathetic heart!” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov hastened to explain that HIS sympathy had nothing in common with + the captain’s, since he dealt, not in empty words alone, but in actual + deeds; in proof of which he was ready then and there (for the purpose of + cutting the matter short, and of dispensing with circumlocution) to + transfer to himself the obligation of paying the taxes due upon such serfs + as Plushkin’s as had, in the unfortunate manner just described, departed + this world. The proposal seemed to astonish Plushkin, for he sat staring + open-eyed. At length he inquired: + </p> + <p> + “My dear sir, have you seen military service?” + </p> + <p> + “No,” replied the other warily, “but I have been a member of the CIVIL + Service.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh! Of the CIVIL Service?” And Plushkin sat moving his lips as though he + were chewing something. “Well, what of your proposal?” he added presently. + “Are you prepared to lose by it?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, certainly, if thereby I can please you.” + </p> + <p> + “My dear sir! My good benefactor!” In his delight Plushkin lost sight of + the fact that his nose was caked with snuff of the consistency of thick + coffee, and that his coat had parted in front and was disclosing some very + unseemly underclothing. “What comfort you have brought to an old man! Yes, + as God is my witness!” + </p> + <p> + For the moment he could say no more. Yet barely a minute had elapsed + before this instantaneously aroused emotion had, as instantaneously, + disappeared from his wooden features. Once more they assumed a careworn + expression, and he even wiped his face with his handkerchief, then rolled + it into a ball, and rubbed it to and fro against his upper lip. + </p> + <p> + “If it will not annoy you again to state the proposal,” he went on, “what + you undertake to do is to pay the annual tax upon these souls, and to + remit the money either to me or to the Treasury?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, that is how it shall be done. We will draw up a deed of purchase as + though the souls were still alive and you had sold them to myself.” + </p> + <p> + “Quite so—a deed of purchase,” echoed Plushkin, once more relapsing + into thought and the chewing motion of the lips. “But a deed of such a + kind will entail certain expenses, and lawyers are so devoid of + conscience! In fact, so extortionate is their avarice that they will + charge one half a rouble, and then a sack of flour, and then a whole + waggon-load of meal. I wonder that no one has yet called attention to the + system.” + </p> + <p> + Upon that Chichikov intimated that, out of respect for his host, he + himself would bear the cost of the transfer of souls. This led Plushkin to + conclude that his guest must be the kind of unconscionable fool who, while + pretending to have been a member of the Civil Service, has in reality + served in the army and run after actresses; wherefore the old man no + longer disguised his delight, but called down blessings alike upon + Chichikov’s head and upon those of his children (he had never even + inquired whether Chichikov possessed a family). Next, he shuffled to the + window, and, tapping one of its panes, shouted the name of “Proshka.” + Immediately some one ran quickly into the hall, and, after much stamping + of feet, burst into the room. This was Proshka—a thirteen-year-old + youngster who was shod with boots of such dimensions as almost to engulf + his legs as he walked. The reason why he had entered thus shod was that + Plushkin only kept one pair of boots for the whole of his domestic staff. + This universal pair was stationed in the hall of the mansion, so that any + servant who was summoned to the house might don the said boots after + wading barefooted through the mud of the courtyard, and enter the parlour + dry-shod—subsequently leaving the boots where he had found them, and + departing in his former barefooted condition. Indeed, had any one, on a + slushy winter’s morning, glanced from a window into the said courtyard, he + would have seen Plushkin’s servitors performing saltatory feats worthy of + the most vigorous of stage-dancers. + </p> + <p> + “Look at that boy’s face!” said Plushkin to Chichikov as he pointed to + Proshka. “It is stupid enough, yet, lay anything aside, and in a trice he + will have stolen it. Well, my lad, what do you want?” + </p> + <p> + He paused a moment or two, but Proshka made no reply. + </p> + <p> + “Come, come!” went on the old man. “Set out the samovar, and then give + Mavra the key of the store-room—here it is—and tell her to get + out some loaf sugar for tea. Here! Wait another moment, fool! Is the devil + in your legs that they itch so to be off? Listen to what more I have to + tell you. Tell Mavra that the sugar on the outside of the loaf has gone + bad, so that she must scrape it off with a knife, and NOT throw away the + scrapings, but give them to the poultry. Also, see that you yourself don’t + go into the storeroom, or I will give you a birching that you won’t care + for. Your appetite is good enough already, but a better one won’t hurt + you. Don’t even TRY to go into the storeroom, for I shall be watching you + from this window.” + </p> + <p> + “You see,” the old man added to Chichikov, “one can never trust these + fellows.” Presently, when Proshka and the boots had departed, he fell to + gazing at his guest with an equally distrustful air, since certain + features in Chichikov’s benevolence now struck him as a little open to + question, and he had begin to think to himself: “After all, the devil only + knows who he is—whether a braggart, like most of these spendthrifts, + or a fellow who is lying merely in order to get some tea out of me.” + Finally, his circumspection, combined with a desire to test his guest, led + him to remark that it might be well to complete the transaction + IMMEDIATELY, since he had not overmuch confidence in humanity, seeing that + a man might be alive to-day and dead to-morrow. + </p> + <p> + To this Chichikov assented readily enough—merely adding that he + should like first of all to be furnished with a list of the dead souls. + This reassured Plushkin as to his guest’s intention of doing business, so + he got out his keys, approached a cupboard, and, having pulled back the + door, rummaged among the cups and glasses with which it was filled. At + length he said: + </p> + <p> + “I cannot find it now, but I used to possess a splendid bottle of liquor. + Probably the servants have drunk it all, for they are such thieves. Oh no: + perhaps this is it!” + </p> + <p> + Looking up, Chichikov saw that Plushkin had extracted a decanter coated + with dust. + </p> + <p> + “My late wife made the stuff,” went on the old man, “but that rascal of a + housekeeper went and threw away a lot of it, and never even replaced the + stopper. Consequently bugs and other nasty creatures got into the + decanter, but I cleaned it out, and now beg to offer you a glassful.” + </p> + <p> + The idea of a drink from such a receptacle was too much for Chichikov, so + he excused himself on the ground that he had just had luncheon. + </p> + <p> + “You have just had luncheon?” re-echoed Plushkin. “Now, THAT shows how + invariably one can tell a man of good society, wheresoever one may be. A + man of that kind never eats anything—he always says that he has had + enough. Very different that from the ways of a rogue, whom one can never + satisfy, however much one may give him. For instance, that captain of mine + is constantly begging me to let him have a meal—though he is about + as much my nephew as I am his grandfather. As it happens, there is never a + bite of anything in the house, so he has to go away empty. But about the + list of those good-for-nothing souls—I happen to possess such a + list, since I have drawn one up in readiness for the next revision.” + </p> + <p> + With that Plushkin donned his spectacles, and once more started to rummage + in the cupboard, and to smother his guest with dust as he untied + successive packages of papers—so much so that his victim burst out + sneezing. Finally he extracted a much-scribbled document in which the + names of the deceased peasants lay as close-packed as a cloud of midges, + for there were a hundred and twenty of them in all. Chichikov grinned with + joy at the sight of the multitude. Stuffing the list into his pocket, he + remarked that, to complete the transaction, it would be necessary to + return to the town. + </p> + <p> + “To the town?” repeated Plushkin. “But why? Moreover, how could I leave + the house, seeing that every one of my servants is either a thief or a + rogue? Day by day they pilfer things, until soon I shall have not a single + coat to hang on my back.” + </p> + <p> + “Then you possess acquaintances in the town?” + </p> + <p> + “Acquaintances? No. Every acquaintance whom I ever possessed has either + left me or is dead. But stop a moment. I DO know the President of the + Council. Even in my old age he has once or twice come to visit me, for he + and I used to be schoolfellows, and to go climbing walls together. Yes, + him I do know. Shall I write him a letter?” + </p> + <p> + “By all means.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, him I know well, for we were friends together at school.” + </p> + <p> + Over Plushkin’s wooden features there had gleamed a ray of warmth—a + ray which expressed, if not feeling, at all events feeling’s pale + reflection. Just such a phenomenon may be witnessed when, for a brief + moment, a drowning man makes a last re-appearance on the surface of a + river, and there rises from the crowd lining the banks a cry of hope that + even yet the exhausted hands may clutch the rope which has been thrown him—may + clutch it before the surface of the unstable element shall have resumed + for ever its calm, dread vacuity. But the hope is short-lived, and the + hands disappear. Even so did Plushkin’s face, after its momentary + manifestation of feeling, become meaner and more insensible than ever. + </p> + <p> + “There used to be a sheet of clean writing paper lying on the table,” he + went on. “But where it is now I cannot think. That comes of my servants + being such rascals.” + </p> + <p> + With that he fell to looking also under the table, as well as to hurrying + about with cries of “Mavra, Mavra!” At length the call was answered by a + woman with a plateful of the sugar of which mention has been made; + whereupon there ensued the following conversation. + </p> + <p> + “What have you done with my piece of writing paper, you pilferer?” + </p> + <p> + “I swear that I have seen no paper except the bit with which you covered + the glass.” + </p> + <p> + “Your very face tells me that you have made off with it.” + </p> + <p> + “Why should I make off with it? ‘Twould be of no use to me, for I can + neither read nor write.” + </p> + <p> + “You lie! You have taken it away for the sexton to scribble upon.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, if the sexton wanted paper he could get some for himself. Neither + he nor I have set eyes upon your piece.” + </p> + <p> + “Ah! Wait a bit, for on the Judgment Day you will be roasted by devils on + iron spits. Just see if you are not!” + </p> + <p> + “But why should I be roasted when I have never even TOUCHED the paper? You + might accuse me of any other fault than theft.” + </p> + <p> + “Nay, devils shall roast you, sure enough. They will say to you, ‘Bad + woman, we are doing this because you robbed your master,’ and then stoke + up the fire still hotter.” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless <i>I</i> shall continue to say, ‘You are roasting me for + nothing, for I never stole anything at all.’ Why, THERE it is, lying on + the table! You have been accusing me for no reason whatever!” + </p> + <p> + And, sure enough, the sheet of paper was lying before Plushkin’s very + eyes. For a moment or two he chewed silently. Then he went on: + </p> + <p> + “Well, and what are you making such a noise about? If one says a single + word to you, you answer back with ten. Go and fetch me a candle to seal a + letter with. And mind you bring a TALLOW candle, for it will not cost so + much as the other sort. And bring me a match too.” + </p> + <p> + Mavra departed, and Plushkin, seating himself, and taking up a pen, sat + turning the sheet of paper over and over, as though in doubt whether to + tear from it yet another morsel. At length he came to the conclusion that + it was impossible to do so, and therefore, dipping the pen into the + mixture of mouldy fluid and dead flies which the ink bottle contained, + started to indite the letter in characters as bold as the notes of a music + score, while momentarily checking the speed of his hand, lest it should + meander too much over the paper, and crawling from line to line as though + he regretted that there was so little vacant space left on the sheet. + </p> + <p> + “And do you happen to know any one to whom a few runaway serfs would be of + use?” he asked as subsequently he folded the letter. + </p> + <p> + “What? You have some runaways as well?” exclaimed Chichikov, again greatly + interested. + </p> + <p> + “Certainly I have. My son-in-law has laid the necessary information + against them, but says that their tracks have grown cold. However, he is + only a military man—that is to say, good at clinking a pair of + spurs, but of no use for laying a plea before a court.” + </p> + <p> + “And how many runaways have you?” + </p> + <p> + “About seventy.” + </p> + <p> + “Surely not?” + </p> + <p> + “Alas, yes. Never does a year pass without a certain number of them making + off. Yet so gluttonous and idle are my serfs that they are simply bursting + with food, whereas I scarcely get enough to eat. I will take any price for + them that you may care to offer. Tell your friends about it, and, should + they find even a score of the runaways, it will repay them handsomely, + seeing that a living serf on the census list is at present worth five + hundred roubles.” + </p> + <p> + “Perhaps so, but I am not going to let any one but myself have a finger in + this,” thought Chichikov to himself; after which he explained to Plushkin + that a friend of the kind mentioned would be impossible to discover, since + the legal expenses of the enterprise would lead to the said friend having + to cut the very tail from his coat before he would get clear of the + lawyers. + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless,” added Chichikov, “seeing that you are so hard pressed for + money, and that I am so interested in the matter, I feel moved to advance + you—well, to advance you such a trifle as would scarcely be worth + mentioning.” + </p> + <p> + “But how much is it?” asked Plushkin eagerly, and with his hands trembling + like quicksilver. + </p> + <p> + “Twenty-five kopecks per soul.” + </p> + <p> + “What? In ready money?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes—in money down.” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless, consider my poverty, dear friend, and make it FORTY kopecks + per soul.” + </p> + <p> + “Venerable sir, would that I could pay you not merely forty kopecks, but + five hundred roubles. I should be only too delighted if that were + possible, since I perceive that you, an aged and respected gentleman, are + suffering for your own goodness of heart.” + </p> + <p> + “By God, that is true, that is true.” Plushkin hung his head, and wagged + it feebly from side to side. “Yes, all that I have done I have done purely + out of kindness.” + </p> + <p> + “See how instantaneously I have divined your nature! By now it will have + become clear to you why it is impossible for me to pay you five hundred + roubles per runaway soul: for by now you will have gathered the fact that + I am not sufficiently rich. Nevertheless, I am ready to add another five + kopecks, and so to make it that each runaway serf shall cost me, in all, + thirty kopecks.” + </p> + <p> + “As you please, dear sir. Yet stretch another point, and throw in another + two kopecks.” + </p> + <p> + “Pardon me, but I cannot. How many runaway serfs did you say that you + possess? Seventy?” + </p> + <p> + “No; seventy-eight.” + </p> + <p> + “Seventy-eight souls at thirty kopecks each will amount to—to—” + only for a moment did our hero halt, since he was strong in his + arithmetic, “—will amount to twenty-four roubles, ninety-six + kopecks.” <a href="#linknote-28" id="linknoteref-28"><small>28</small></a> + </p> + <p> + With that he requested Plushkin to make out the receipt, and then handed + him the money. Plushkin took it in both hands, bore it to a bureau with as + much caution as though he were carrying a liquid which might at any moment + splash him in the face, and, arrived at the bureau, and glancing round + once more, carefully packed the cash in one of his money bags, where, + doubtless, it was destined to lie buried until, to the intense joy of his + daughters and his son-in-law (and, perhaps, of the captain who claimed + kinship with him), he should himself receive burial at the hands of + Fathers Carp and Polycarp, the two priests attached to his village. + Lastly, the money concealed, Plushkin re-seated himself in the armchair, + and seemed at a loss for further material for conversation. + </p> + <p> + “Are you thinking of starting?” at length he inquired, on seeing Chichikov + making a trifling movement, though the movement was only to extract from + his pocket a handkerchief. Nevertheless the question reminded Chichikov + that there was no further excuse for lingering. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I must be going,” he said as he took his hat. + </p> + <p> + “Then what about the tea?” + </p> + <p> + “Thank you, I will have some on my next visit.” + </p> + <p> + “What? Even though I have just ordered the samovar to be got ready? Well, + well! I myself do not greatly care for tea, for I think it an expensive + beverage. Moreover, the price of sugar has risen terribly.” + </p> + <p> + “Proshka!” he then shouted. “The samovar will not be needed. Return the + sugar to Mavra, and tell her to put it back again. But no. Bring the sugar + here, and <i>I</i> will put it back.” + </p> + <p> + “Good-bye, dear sir,” finally he added to Chichikov. “May the Lord bless + you! Hand that letter to the President of the Council, and let him read + it. Yes, he is an old friend of mine. We knew one another as + schoolfellows.” + </p> + <p> + With that this strange phenomenon, this withered old man, escorted his + guest to the gates of the courtyard, and, after the guest had departed, + ordered the gates to be closed, made the round of the outbuildings for the + purpose of ascertaining whether the numerous watchmen were at their posts, + peered into the kitchen (where, under the pretence of seeing whether his + servants were being properly fed, he made a light meal of cabbage soup and + gruel), rated the said servants soundly for their thievishness and general + bad behaviour, and then returned to his room. Meditating in solitude, he + fell to thinking how best he could contrive to recompense his guest for + the latter’s measureless benevolence. “I will present him,” he thought to + himself, “with a watch. It is a good silver article—not one of those + cheap metal affairs; and though it has suffered some damage, he can easily + get that put right. A young man always needs to give a watch to his + betrothed.” + </p> + <p> + “No,” he added after further thought. “I will leave him the watch in my + will, as a keepsake.” + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile our hero was bowling along in high spirit. Such an unexpected + acquisition both of dead souls and of runaway serfs had come as a + windfall. Even before reaching Plushkin’s village he had had a + presentiment that he would do successful business there, but not business + of such pre-eminent profitableness as had actually resulted. As he + proceeded he whistled, hummed with hand placed trumpetwise to his mouth, + and ended by bursting into a burst of melody so striking that Selifan, + after listening for a while, nodded his head and exclaimed, “My word, but + the master CAN sing!” + </p> + <p> + By the time they reached the town darkness had fallen, and changed the + character of the scene. The britchka bounded over the cobblestones, and at + length turned into the hostelry’s courtyard, where the travellers were met + by Petrushka. With one hand holding back the tails of his coat (which he + never liked to see fly apart), the valet assisted his master to alight. + The waiter ran out with candle in hand and napkin on shoulder. Whether or + not Petrushka was glad to see the barin return it is impossible to say, + but at all events he exchanged a wink with Selifan, and his ordinarily + morose exterior seemed momentarily to brighten. + </p> + <p> + “Then you have been travelling far, sir?” said the waiter, as he lit the + way upstarts. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” said Chichikov. “What has happened here in the meanwhile?” + </p> + <p> + “Nothing, sir,” replied the waiter, bowing, “except that last night there + arrived a military lieutenant. He has got room number sixteen.” + </p> + <p> + “A lieutenant?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes. He came from Riazan, driving three grey horses.” + </p> + <p> + On entering his room, Chichikov clapped his hand to his nose, and asked + his valet why he had never had the windows opened. + </p> + <p> + “But I did have them opened,” replied Petrushka. Nevertheless this was a + lie, as Chichikov well knew, though he was too tired to contest the point. + After ordering and consuming a light supper of sucking pig, he undressed, + plunged beneath the bedclothes, and sank into the profound slumber which + comes only to such fortunate folk as are troubled neither with mosquitoes + nor fleas nor excessive activity of brain. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0007"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER VII + </h3> + <p> + When Chichikov awoke he stretched himself and realised that he had slept + well. For a moment or two he lay on his back, and then suddenly clapped + his hands at the recollection that he was now owner of nearly four hundred + souls. At once he leapt out of bed without so much as glancing at his face + in the mirror, though, as a rule, he had much solicitude for his features, + and especially for his chin, of which he would make the most when in + company with friends, and more particularly should any one happen to enter + while he was engaged in the process of shaving. “Look how round my chin + is!” was his usual formula. On the present occasion, however, he looked + neither at chin nor at any other feature, but at once donned his + flower-embroidered slippers of morroco leather (the kind of slippers in + which, thanks to the Russian love for a dressing-gowned existence, the + town of Torzhok does such a huge trade), and, clad only in a meagre shirt, + so far forgot his elderliness and dignity as to cut a couple of capers + after the fashion of a Scottish highlander—alighting neatly, each + time, on the flat of his heels. Only when he had done that did he proceed + to business. Planting himself before his dispatch-box, he rubbed his hands + with a satisfaction worthy of an incorruptible rural magistrate when + adjourning for luncheon; after which he extracted from the receptacle a + bundle of papers. These he had decided not to deposit with a lawyer, for + the reason that he would hasten matters, as well as save expense, by + himself framing and fair-copying the necessary deeds of indenture; and + since he was thoroughly acquainted with the necessary terminology, he + proceeded to inscribe in large characters the date, and then in smaller + ones, his name and rank. By two o’clock the whole was finished, and as he + looked at the sheets of names representing bygone peasants who had + ploughed, worked at handicrafts, cheated their masters, fetched, carried, + and got drunk (though SOME of them may have behaved well), there came over + him a strange, unaccountable sensation. To his eye each list of names + seemed to possess a character of its own; and even individual peasants + therein seemed to have taken on certain qualities peculiar to themselves. + For instance, to the majority of Madame Korobotchka’s serfs there were + appended nicknames and other additions; Plushkin’s list was distinguished + by a conciseness of exposition which had led to certain of the items being + represented merely by Christian name, patronymic, and a couple of dots; + and Sobakevitch’s list was remarkable for its amplitude and + circumstantiality, in that not a single peasant had such of his peculiar + characteristics omitted as that the deceased had been “excellent at + joinery,” or “sober and ready to pay attention to his work.” Also, in + Sobakevitch’s list there was recorded who had been the father and the + mother of each of the deceased, and how those parents had behaved + themselves. Only against the name of a certain Thedotov was there + inscribed: “Father unknown, Mother the maidservant Kapitolina, Morals and + Honesty good.” These details communicated to the document a certain air of + freshness, they seemed to connote that the peasants in question had lived + but yesterday. As Chichikov scanned the list he felt softened in spirit, + and said with a sigh: + </p> + <p> + “My friends, what a concourse of you is here! How did you all pass your + lives, my brethren? And how did you all come to depart hence?” + </p> + <p> + As he spoke his eyes halted at one name in particular—that of the + same Peter Saveliev Neuvazhai Korito who had once been the property of the + window Korobotchka. Once more he could not help exclaiming: + </p> + <p> + “What a series of titles! They occupy a whole line! Peter Saveliev, I + wonder whether you were an artisan or a plain muzhik. Also, I wonder how + you came to meet your end; whether in a tavern, or whether through going + to sleep in the middle of the road and being run over by a train of + waggons. Again, I see the name, ‘Probka Stepan, carpenter, very sober.’ + That must be the hero of whom the Guards would have been so glad to get + hold. How well I can imagine him tramping the country with an axe in his + belt and his boots on his shoulder, and living on a few groats’-worth of + bread and dried fish per day, and taking home a couple of half-rouble + pieces in his purse, and sewing the notes into his breeches, or stuffing + them into his boots! In what manner came you by your end, Probka Stepan? + Did you, for good wages, mount a scaffold around the cupola of the village + church, and, climbing thence to the cross above, miss your footing on a + beam, and fall headlong with none at hand but Uncle Michai—the good + uncle who, scratching the back of his neck, and muttering, ‘Ah, Vania, for + once you have been too clever!’ straightway lashed himself to a rope, and + took your place? ‘Maksim Teliatnikov, shoemaker.’ A shoemaker, indeed? ‘As + drunk as a shoemaker,’ says the proverb. <i>I</i> know what you were like, + my friend. If you wish, I will tell you your whole history. You were + apprenticed to a German, who fed you and your fellows at a common table, + thrashed you with a strap, kept you indoors whenever you had made a + mistake, and spoke of you in uncomplimentary terms to his wife and + friends. At length, when your apprenticeship was over, you said to + yourself, ‘I am going to set up on my own account, and not just to scrape + together a kopeck here and a kopeck there, as the Germans do, but to grow + rich quick.’ Hence you took a shop at a high rent, bespoke a few orders, + and set to work to buy up some rotten leather out of which you could make, + on each pair of boots, a double profit. But those boots split within a + fortnight, and brought down upon your head dire showers of maledictions; + with the result that gradually your shop grew empty of customers, and you + fell to roaming the streets and exclaiming, ‘The world is a very poor + place indeed! A Russian cannot make a living for German competition.’ + Well, well! ‘Elizabeta Vorobei!’ But that is a WOMAN’S name! How comes SHE + to be on the list? That villain Sobakevitch must have sneaked her in + without my knowing it.” + </p> + <p> + “‘Grigori Goiezhai-ne-Doiedesh,’” he went on. “What sort of a man were + YOU, I wonder? Were you a carrier who, having set up a team of three + horses and a tilt waggon, left your home, your native hovel, for ever, and + departed to cart merchandise to market? Was it on the highway that you + surrendered your soul to God, or did your friends first marry you to some + fat, red-faced soldier’s daughter; after which your harness and team of + rough, but sturdy, horses caught a highwayman’s fancy, and you, lying on + your pallet, thought things over until, willy-nilly, you felt that you + must get up and make for the tavern, thereafter blundering into an + icehole? Ah, our peasant of Russia! Never do you welcome death when it + comes!” + </p> + <p> + “And you, my friends?” continued Chichikov, turning to the sheet whereon + were inscribed the names of Plushkin’s absconded serfs. “Although you are + still alive, what is the good of you? You are practically dead. Whither, I + wonder, have your fugitive feet carried you? Did you fare hardly at + Plushkin’s, or was it that your natural inclinations led you to prefer + roaming the wilds and plundering travellers? Are you, by this time, in + gaol, or have you taken service with other masters for the tillage of + their lands? ‘Eremei Kariakin, Nikita Volokita and Anton Volokita (son of + the foregoing).’ To judge from your surnames, you would seem to have been + born gadabouts <a href="#linknote-29" id="linknoteref-29"><small>29</small></a>. ‘Popov, household serf.’ + Probably you are an educated man, good Popov, and go in for polite + thieving, as distinguished from the more vulgar cut-throat sort. In my + mind’s eye I seem to see a Captain of Rural Police challenging you for + being without a passport; whereupon you stake your all upon a single + throw. ‘To whom do you belong?’ asks the Captain, probably adding to his + question a forcible expletive. ‘To such and such a landowner,’ stoutly you + reply. ‘And what are you doing here?’ continues the Captain. ‘I have just + received permission to go and earn my obrok,’ is your fluent explanation. + ‘Then where is your passport?’ ‘At Miestchanin <a href="#linknote-30" id="linknoteref-30"><small>30</small></a> + Pimenov’s.’ ‘Pimenov’s? Then are you Pimenov himself?’ ‘Yes, I am Pimenov + himself.’ ‘He has given you his passport?’ ‘No, he has not given me his + passport.’ ‘Come, come!’ shouts the Captain with another forcible + expletive. ‘You are lying!’ ‘No, I am not,’ is your dogged reply. ‘It is + only that last night I could not return him his passport, because I came + home late; so I handed it to Antip Prochorov, the bell-ringer, for him to + take care of.’ ‘Bell-ringer, indeed! Then HE gave you a passport?’ ‘No; I + did not receive a passport from him either.’ ‘What?’—and here the + Captain shouts another expletive—‘How dare you keep on lying? Where + is YOUR OWN passport?’ ‘I had one all right,’ you reply cunningly, ‘but + must have dropped it somewhere on the road as I came along.’ ‘And what + about that soldier’s coat?’ asks the Captain with an impolite addition. + ‘Whence did you get it? And what of the priest’s cashbox and copper + money?’’ ‘About them I know nothing,’ you reply doggedly. ‘Never at any + time have I committed a theft.’ ‘Then how is it that the coat was found at + your place?’ ‘I do not know. Probably some one else put it there.’ ‘You + rascal, you rascal!’ shouts the Captain, shaking his head, and closing in + upon you. ‘Put the leg-irons upon him, and off with him to prison!’ ‘With + pleasure,’ you reply as, taking a snuff-box from your pocket, you offer a + pinch to each of the two gendarmes who are manacling you, while also + inquiring how long they have been discharged from the army, and in what + wars they may have served. And in prison you remain until your case comes + on, when the justice orders you to be removed from Tsarev-Kokshaika to + such and such another prison, and a second justice orders you to be + transferred thence to Vesiegonsk or somewhere else, and you go flitting + from gaol to gaol, and saying each time, as you eye your new habitation, + ‘The last place was a good deal cleaner than this one is, and one could + play babki <a href="#linknote-31" id="linknoteref-31"><small>31</small></a> + there, and stretch one’s legs, and see a little society.’” + </p> + <p> + “‘Abakum Thirov,’” Chichikov went on after a pause. “What of YOU, brother? + Where, and in what capacity, are YOU disporting yourself? Have you gone to + the Volga country, and become bitten with the life of freedom, and joined + the fishermen of the river?” + </p> + <p> + Here, breaking off, Chichikov relapsed into silent meditation. Of what was + he thinking as he sat there? Was he thinking of the fortunes of Abakum + Thirov, or was he meditating as meditates every Russian when his thoughts + once turn to the joys of an emancipated existence? + </p> + <p> + “Ah, well!” he sighed, looking at his watch. “It has now gone twelve + o’clock. Why have I so forgotten myself? There is still much to be done, + yet I go shutting myself up and letting my thoughts wander! What a fool I + am!” + </p> + <p> + So saying, he exchanged his Scottish costume (of a shirt and nothing else) + for attire of a more European nature; after which he pulled tight the + waistcoat over his ample stomach, sprinkled himself with eau-de-Cologne, + tucked his papers under his arm, took his fur cap, and set out for the + municipal offices, for the purpose of completing the transfer of souls. + The fact that he hurried along was not due to a fear of being late (seeing + that the President of the Local Council was an intimate acquaintance of + his, as well as a functionary who could shorten or prolong an interview at + will, even as Homer’s Zeus was able to shorten or to prolong a night or a + day, whenever it became necessary to put an end to the fighting of his + favourite heroes, or to enable them to join battle), but rather to a + feeling that he would like to have the affair concluded as quickly as + possible, seeing that, throughout, it had been an anxious and difficult + business. Also, he could not get rid of the idea that his souls were + unsubstantial things, and that therefore, under the circumstances, his + shoulders had better be relieved of their load with the least possible + delay. Pulling on his cinnamon-coloured, bear-lined overcoat as he went, + he had just stepped thoughtfully into the street when he collided with a + gentleman dressed in a similar coat and an ear-lappeted fur cap. Upon that + the gentleman uttered an exclamation. Behold, it was Manilov! At once the + friends became folded in a strenuous embrace, and remained so locked for + fully five minutes. Indeed, the kisses exchanged were so vigorous that + both suffered from toothache for the greater portion of the day. Also, + Manilov’s delight was such that only his nose and lips remained visible—the + eyes completely disappeared. Afterwards he spent about a quarter of an + hour in holding Chichikov’s hand and chafing it vigorously. Lastly, he, in + the most pleasant and exquisite terms possible, intimated to his friend + that he had just been on his way to embrace Paul Ivanovitch; and upon this + followed a compliment of the kind which would more fittingly have been + addressed to a lady who was being asked to accord a partner the favour of + a dance. Chichikov had opened his mouth to reply—though even HE felt + at a loss how to acknowledge what had just been said—when Manilov + cut him short by producing from under his coat a roll of paper tied with + red riband. + </p> + <p> + “What have you there?” asked Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “The list of my souls.” + </p> + <p> + “Ah!” And as Chichikov unrolled the document and ran his eye over it he + could not but marvel at the elegant neatness with which it had been + inscribed. + </p> + <p> + “It is a beautiful piece of writing,” he said. “In fact, there will be no + need to make a copy of it. Also, it has a border around its edge! Who + worked that exquisite border?” + </p> + <p> + “Do not ask me,” said Manilov. + </p> + <p> + “Did YOU do it?” + </p> + <p> + “No; my wife.” + </p> + <p> + “Dear, dear!” Chichikov cried. “To think that I should have put her to so + much trouble!” + </p> + <p> + “NOTHING could be too much trouble where Paul Ivanovitch is concerned.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov bowed his acknowledgements. Next, on learning that he was on his + way to the municipal offices for the purpose of completing the transfer, + Manilov expressed his readiness to accompany him; wherefore the pair + linked arm in arm and proceeded together. Whenever they encountered a + slight rise in the ground—even the smallest unevenness or difference + of level—Manilov supported Chichikov with such energy as almost to + lift him off his feet, while accompanying the service with a smiling + implication that not if HE could help it should Paul Ivanovitch slip or + fall. Nevertheless this conduct appeared to embarrass Chichikov, either + because he could not find any fitting words of gratitude or because he + considered the proceeding tiresome; and it was with a sense of relief that + he debouched upon the square where the municipal offices—a large, + three-storied building of a chalky whiteness which probably symbolised the + purity of the souls engaged within—were situated. No other building + in the square could vie with them in size, seeing that the remaining + edifices consisted only of a sentry-box, a shelter for two or three + cabmen, and a long hoarding—the latter adorned with the usual bills, + posters, and scrawls in chalk and charcoal. At intervals, from the windows + of the second and third stories of the municipal offices, the + incorruptible heads of certain of the attendant priests of Themis would + peer quickly forth, and as quickly disappear again—probably for the + reason that a superior official had just entered the room. Meanwhile the + two friends ascended the staircase—nay, almost flew up it, since, + longing to get rid of Manilov’s ever-supporting arm, Chichikov hastened + his steps, and Manilov kept darting forward to anticipate any possible + failure on the part of his companion’s legs. Consequently the pair were + breathless when they reached the first corridor. In passing it may be + remarked that neither corridors nor rooms evinced any of that cleanliness + and purity which marked the exterior of the building, for such attributes + were not troubled about within, and anything that was dirty remained so, + and donned no meritricious, purely external, disguise. It was as though + Themis received her visitors in neglige and a dressing-gown. The author + would also give a description of the various offices through which our + hero passed, were it not that he (the author) stands in awe of such legal + haunts. + </p> + <p> + Approaching the first desk which he happened to encounter, Chichikov + inquired of the two young officials who were seated at it whether they + would kindly tell him where business relating to serf-indenture was + transacted. + </p> + <p> + “Of what nature, precisely, IS your business?” countered one of the + youthful officials as he turned himself round. + </p> + <p> + “I desire to make an application.” + </p> + <p> + “In connection with a purchase?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes. But, as I say, I should like first to know where I can find the desk + devoted to such business. Is it here or elsewhere?” + </p> + <p> + “You must state what it is you have bought, and for how much. THEN we + shall be happy to give you the information.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov perceived that the officials’ motive was merely one of + curiosity, as often happens when young tchinovniks desire to cut a more + important and imposing figure than is rightfully theirs. + </p> + <p> + “Look here, young sirs,” he said. “I know for a fact that all serf + business, no matter to what value, is transacted at one desk alone. + Consequently I again request you to direct me to that desk. Of course, if + you do not know your business I can easily ask some one else.” + </p> + <p> + To this the tchinovniks made no reply beyond pointing towards a corner of + the room where an elderly man appeared to be engaged in sorting some + papers. Accordingly Chichikov and Manilov threaded their way in his + direction through the desks; whereupon the elderly man became violently + busy. + </p> + <p> + “Would you mind telling me,” said Chichikov, bowing, “whether this is the + desk for serf affairs?” + </p> + <p> + The elderly man raised his eyes, and said stiffly: + </p> + <p> + “This is NOT the desk for serf affairs.” + </p> + <p> + “Where is it, then?” + </p> + <p> + “In the Serf Department.” + </p> + <p> + “And where might the Serf Department be?” + </p> + <p> + “In charge of Ivan Antonovitch.” + </p> + <p> + “And where is Ivan Antonovitch?” + </p> + <p> + The elderly man pointed to another corner of the room; whither Chichikov + and Manilov next directed their steps. As they advanced, Ivan Antonovitch + cast an eye backwards and viewed them askance. Then, with renewed ardour, + he resumed his work of writing. + </p> + <p> + “Would you mind telling me,” said Chichikov, bowing, “whether this is the + desk for serf affairs?” + </p> + <p> + It appeared as though Ivan Antonovitch had not heard, so completely did he + bury himself in his papers and return no reply. Instantly it became plain + that HE at least was of an age of discretion, and not one of your jejune + chatterboxes and harum-scarums; for, although his hair was still thick and + black, he had long ago passed his fortieth year. His whole face tended + towards the nose—it was what, in common parlance, is known as a + “pitcher-mug.” + </p> + <p> + “Would you mind telling me,” repeated Chichikov, “whether this is the desk + for serf affairs?” + </p> + <p> + “It is that,” said Ivan Antonovitch, again lowering his jug-shaped jowl, + and resuming his writing. + </p> + <p> + “Then I should like to transact the following business. From various + landowners in this canton I have purchased a number of peasants for + transfer. Here is the purchase list, and it needs but to be registered.” + </p> + <p> + “Have you also the vendors here?” + </p> + <p> + “Some of them, and from the rest I have obtained powers of attorney.” + </p> + <p> + “And have you your statement of application?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes. I desire—indeed, it is necessary for me so to do—to + hasten matters a little. Could the affair, therefore, be carried through + to-day?” + </p> + <p> + “To-day? Oh, dear no!” said Ivan Antonovitch. “Before that can be done you + must furnish me with further proofs that no impediments exist.” + </p> + <p> + “Then, to expedite matters, let me say that Ivan Grigorievitch, the + President of the Council, is a very intimate friend of mine.” + </p> + <p> + “Possibly,” said Ivan Antonovitch without enthusiasm. “But Ivan + Grigorievitch alone will not do—it is customary to have others as + well.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but the absence of others will not altogether invalidate the + transaction. I too have been in the service, and know how things can be + done.” + </p> + <p> + “You had better go and see Ivan Grigorievitch,” said Ivan Antonovitch more + mildly. “Should he give you an order addressed to whom it may concern, we + shall soon be able to settle the matter.” + </p> + <p> + Upon that Chichikov pulled from his pocket a paper, and laid it before + Ivan Antonovitch. At once the latter covered it with a book. Chichikov + again attempted to show it to him, but, with a movement of his head, Ivan + Antonovitch signified that that was unnecessary. + </p> + <p> + “A clerk,” he added, “will now conduct you to Ivan Grigorievitch’s room.” + </p> + <p> + Upon that one of the toilers in the service of Themis—a zealot who + had offered her such heartfelt sacrifice that his coat had burst at the + elbows and lacked a lining—escorted our friends (even as Virgil had + once escorted Dante) to the apartment of the Presence. In this sanctum + were some massive armchairs, a table laden with two or three fat books, + and a large looking-glass. Lastly, in (apparently) sunlike isolation, + there was seated at the table the President. On arriving at the door of + the apartment, our modern Virgil seemed to have become so overwhelmed with + awe that, without daring even to intrude a foot, he turned back, and, in + so doing, once more exhibited a back as shiny as a mat, and having + adhering to it, in one spot, a chicken’s feather. As soon as the two + friends had entered the hall of the Presence they perceived that the + President was NOT alone, but, on the contrary, had seated by his side + Sobakevitch, whose form had hitherto been concealed by the intervening + mirror. The newcomers’ entry evoked sundry exclamations and the pushing + back of a pair of Government chairs as the voluminous-sleeved Sobakevitch + rose into view from behind the looking-glass. Chichikov the President + received with an embrace, and for a while the hall of the Presence + resounded with osculatory salutations as mutually the pair inquired after + one another’s health. It seemed that both had lately had a touch of that + pain under the waistband which comes of a sedentary life. Also, it seemed + that the President had just been conversing with Sobakevitch on the + subject of sales of souls, since he now proceeded to congratulate + Chichikov on the same—a proceeding which rather embarrassed our + hero, seeing that Manilov and Sobakevitch, two of the vendors, and persons + with whom he had bargained in the strictest privacy, were now confronting + one another direct. However, Chichikov duly thanked the President, and + then, turning to Sobakevitch, inquired after HIS health. + </p> + <p> + “Thank God, I have nothing to complain of,” replied Sobakevitch: which was + true enough, seeing that a piece of iron would have caught cold and taken + to sneezing sooner than would that uncouthly fashioned landowner. + </p> + <p> + “Ah, yes; you have always had good health, have you not?” put in the + President. “Your late father was equally strong.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, he even went out bear hunting alone,” replied Sobakevitch. + </p> + <p> + “I should think that you too could worst a bear if you were to try a + tussle with him,” rejoined the President. + </p> + <p> + “Oh no,” said Sobakevitch. “My father was a stronger man than I am.” Then + with a sigh the speaker added: “But nowadays there are no such men as he. + What is even a life like mine worth?” + </p> + <p> + “Then you do not have a comfortable time of it?” exclaimed the President. + </p> + <p> + “No; far from it,” rejoined Sobakevitch, shaking his head. “Judge for + yourself, Ivan Grigorievitch. I am fifty years old, yet never in my life + had been ill, except for an occasional carbuncle or boil. That is not a + good sign. Sooner or later I shall have to pay for it.” And he relapsed + into melancholy. + </p> + <p> + “Just listen to the fellow!” was Chichikov’s and the President’s joint + inward comment. “What on earth has HE to complain of?” + </p> + <p> + “I have a letter for you, Ivan Grigorievitch,” went on Chichikov aloud as + he produced from his pocket Plushkin’s epistle. + </p> + <p> + “From whom?” inquired the President. Having broken the seal, he exclaimed: + “Why, it is from Plushkin! To think that HE is still alive! What a strange + world it is! He used to be such a nice fellow, and now—” + </p> + <p> + “And now he is a cur,” concluded Sobakevitch, “as well as a miser who + starves his serfs to death.” + </p> + <p> + “Allow me a moment,” said the President. Then he read the letter through. + When he had finished he added: “Yes, I am quite ready to act as Plushkin’s + attorney. When do you wish the purchase deeds to be registered, Monsieur + Chichikov—now or later?” + </p> + <p> + “Now, if you please,” replied Chichikov. “Indeed, I beg that, if possible, + the affair may be concluded to-day, since to-morrow I wish to leave the + town. I have brought with me both the forms of indenture and my statement + of application.” + </p> + <p> + “Very well. Nevertheless we cannot let you depart so soon. The indentures + shall be completed to-day, but you must continue your sojourn in our + midst. I will issue the necessary orders at once.” + </p> + <p> + So saying, he opened the door into the general office, where the clerks + looked like a swarm of bees around a honeycomb (if I may liken affairs of + Government to such an article?). + </p> + <p> + “Is Ivan Antonovitch here?” asked the President. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” replied a voice from within. + </p> + <p> + “Then send him here.” + </p> + <p> + Upon that the pitcher-faced Ivan Antonovitch made his appearance in the + doorway, and bowed. + </p> + <p> + “Take these indentures, Ivan Antonovitch,” said the President, “and see + that they—” + </p> + <p> + “But first I would ask you to remember,” put in Sobakevitch, “that + witnesses ought to be in attendance—not less than two on behalf of + either party. Let us, therefore, send for the Public Prosecutor, who has + little to do, and has even that little done for him by his chief clerk, + Zolotucha. The Inspector of the Medical Department is also a man of + leisure, and likely to be at home—if he has not gone out to a card + party. Others also there are—all men who cumber the ground for + nothing.” + </p> + <p> + “Quite so, quite so,” agreed the President, and at once dispatched a clerk + to fetch the persons named. + </p> + <p> + “Also,” requested Chichikov, “I should be glad if you would send for the + accredited representative of a certain lady landowner with whom I have + done business. He is the son of a Father Cyril, and a clerk in your + offices.” + </p> + <p> + “Certainly we shall call him here,” replied the President. “Everything + shall be done to meet your convenience, and I forbid you to present any of + our officials with a gratuity. That is a special request on my part. No + friend of mine ever pays a copper.” + </p> + <p> + With that he gave Ivan Antonovitch the necessary instructions; and though + they scarcely seemed to meet with that functionary’s approval, upon the + President the purchase deeds had evidently produced an excellent + impression, more especially since the moment when he had perceived the sum + total to amount to nearly a hundred thousand roubles. For a moment or two + he gazed into Chichikov’s eyes with an expression of profound + satisfaction. Then he said: + </p> + <p> + “Well done, Paul Ivanovitch! You have indeed made a nice haul!” + </p> + <p> + “That is so,” replied Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Excellent business! Yes, excellent business!” + </p> + <p> + “I, too, conceive that I could not well have done better. The truth is + that never until a man has driven home the piles of his life’s structure + upon a lasting bottom, instead of upon the wayward chimeras of youth, will + his aims in life assume a definite end.” And, that said, Chichikov went on + to deliver himself of a very telling indictment of Liberalism and our + modern young men. Yet in his words there seemed to lurk a certain lack of + conviction. Somehow he seemed secretly to be saying to himself, “My good + sir, you are talking the most absolute rubbish, and nothing but rubbish.” + Nor did he even throw a glance at Sobakevitch and Manilov. It was as + though he were uncertain what he might not encounter in their expression. + Yet he need not have been afraid. Never once did Sobakevitch’s face move a + muscle, and, as for Manilov, he was too much under the spell of + Chichikov’s eloquence to do aught beyond nod his approval at intervals, + and strike the kind of attitude which is assumed by lovers of music when a + lady singer has, in rivalry of an accompanying violin, produced a note + whereof the shrillness would exceed even the capacity of a bird’s + throstle. + </p> + <p> + “But why not tell Ivan Grigorievitch precisely what you have bought?” + inquired Sobakevitch of Chichikov. “And why, Ivan Grigorievitch, do YOU + not ask Monsieur Chichikov precisely what his purchases have consisted of? + What a splendid lot of serfs, to be sure! I myself have sold him my + wheelwright, Michiev.” + </p> + <p> + “What? You have sold him Michiev?” exclaimed the President. “I know the + man well. He is a splendid craftsman, and, on one occasion, made me a + drozhki <a href="#linknote-32" id="linknoteref-32"><small>32</small></a>. + Only, only—well, lately didn’t you tell me that he is dead?” + </p> + <p> + “That Michiev is dead?” re-echoed Sobakevitch, coming perilously near to + laughing. “Oh dear no! That was his brother. Michiev himself is very much + alive, and in even better health than he used to be. Any day he could + knock you up a britchka such as you could not procure even in Moscow. + However, he is now bound to work for only one master.” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed a splendid craftsman!” repeated the President. “My only wonder is + that you can have brought yourself to part with him.” + </p> + <p> + “Then think you that Michiev is the ONLY serf with whom I have parted? + Nay, for I have parted also with Probka Stepan, my carpenter, with + Milushkin, my bricklayer, and with Teliatnikov, my bootmaker. Yes, the + whole lot I have sold.” + </p> + <p> + And to the President’s inquiry why he had so acted, seeing that the serfs + named were all skilled workers and indispensable to a household, + Sobakevitch replied that a mere whim had led him to do so, and thus the + sale had owed its origin to a piece of folly. Then he hung his head as + though already repenting of his rash act, and added: + </p> + <p> + “Although a man of grey hairs, I have not yet learned wisdom.” + </p> + <p> + “But,” inquired the President further, “how comes it about, Paul + Ivanovitch, that you have purchased peasants apart from land? Is it for + transferment elsewhere that you need them?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes.” + </p> + <p> + “Very well, then. That is quite another matter. To what province of the + country?” + </p> + <p> + “To the province of Kherson.” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed? That region contains some splendid land,” said the President; + whereupon he proceeded to expatiate on the fertility of the Kherson + pastures. + </p> + <p> + “And have you MUCH land there?” he continued. + </p> + <p> + “Yes; quite sufficient to accommodate the serfs whom I have purchased.” + </p> + <p> + “And is there a river on the estate or a lake?” + </p> + <p> + “Both.” + </p> + <p> + After this reply Chichikov involuntarily threw a glance at Sobakevitch; + and though that landowner’s face was as motionless as every other, the + other seemed to detect in it: “You liar! Don’t tell ME that you own both a + river and a lake, as well as the land which you say you do.” + </p> + <p> + Whilst the foregoing conversation had been in progress, various witnesses + had been arriving on the scene. They consisted of the constantly blinking + Public Prosecutor, the Inspector of the Medical Department, and others—all, + to quote Sobakevitch, “men who cumbered the ground for nothing.” With some + of them, however, Chichikov was altogether unacquainted, since certain + substitutes and supernumeraries had to be pressed into the service from + among the ranks of the subordinate staff. There also arrived, in answer to + the summons, not only the son of Father Cyril before mentioned, but also + Father Cyril himself. Each such witness appended to his signature a full + list of his dignities and qualifications: one man in printed characters, + another in a flowing hand, a third in topsy-turvy characters of a kind + never before seen in the Russian alphabet, and so forth. Meanwhile our + friend Ivan Antonovitch comported himself with not a little address; and + after the indentures had been signed, docketed, and registered, Chichikov + found himself called upon to pay only the merest trifle in the way of + Government percentage and fees for publishing the transaction in the + Official Gazette. The reason of this was that the President had given + orders that only half the usual charges were to be exacted from the + present purchaser—the remaining half being somehow debited to the + account of another applicant for serf registration. + </p> + <p> + “And now,” said Ivan Grigorievitch when all was completed, “we need only + to wet the bargain.” + </p> + <p> + “For that too I am ready,” said Chichikov. “Do you but name the hour. If, + in return for your most agreeable company, I were not to set a few + champagne corks flying, I should be indeed in default.” + </p> + <p> + “But we are not going to let you charge yourself with anything whatsoever. + WE must provide the champagne, for you are our guest, and it is for us—it + is our duty, it is our bounden obligation—to entertain you. Look + here, gentlemen. Let us adjourn to the house of the Chief of Police. He is + the magician who needs but to wink when passing a fishmonger’s or a wine + merchant’s. Not only shall we fare well at his place, but also we shall + get a game of whist.” + </p> + <p> + To this proposal no one had any objection to offer, for the mere mention + of the fish shop aroused the witnesses’ appetite. Consequently, the + ceremony being over, there was a general reaching for hats and caps. As + the party were passing through the general office, Ivan Antonovitch + whispered in Chichikov’s ear, with a courteous inclination of his + jug-shaped physiognomy: + </p> + <p> + “You have given a hundred thousand roubles for the serfs, but have paid ME + only a trifle for my trouble.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” replied Chichikov with a similar whisper, “but what sort of serfs + do you suppose them to be? They are a poor, useless lot, and not worth + even half the purchase money.” + </p> + <p> + This gave Ivan Antonovitch to understand that the visitor was a man of + strong character—a man from whom nothing more was to be expected. + </p> + <p> + “Why have you gone and purchased souls from Plushkin?” whispered + Sobakevitch in Chichikov’s other ear. + </p> + <p> + “Why did YOU go and add the woman Vorobei to your list?” retorted + Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Vorobei? Who is Vorobei?” + </p> + <p> + “The woman ‘Elizabet’ Vorobei—‘Elizabet,’ not ‘Elizabeta?’” + </p> + <p> + “I added no such name,” replied Sobakevitch, and straightway joined the + other guests. + </p> + <p> + At length the party arrived at the residence of the Chief of Police. The + latter proved indeed a man of spells, for no sooner had he learnt what was + afoot than he summoned a brisk young constable, whispered in his ear, + adding laconically, “You understand, do you not?” and brought it about + that, during the time that the guests were cutting for partners at whist + in an adjoining room, the dining-table became laden with sturgeon, + caviare, salmon, herrings, cheese, smoked tongue, fresh roe, and a potted + variety of the same—all procured from the local fish market, and + reinforced with additions from the host’s own kitchen. The fact was that + the worthy Chief of Police filled the office of a sort of father and + general benefactor to the town, and that he moved among the citizens as + though they constituted part and parcel of his own family, and watched + over their shops and markets as though those establishments were merely + his own private larder. Indeed, it would be difficult to say—so + thoroughly did he perform his duties in this respect—whether the + post most fitted him, or he the post. Matters were also so arranged that + though his income more than doubled that of his predecessors, he had never + lost the affection of his fellow townsmen. In particular did the tradesmen + love him, since he was never above standing godfather to their children or + dining at their tables. True, he had differences of opinion with them, and + serious differences at that; but always these were skilfully adjusted by + his slapping the offended ones jovially on the shoulder, drinking a glass + of tea with them, promising to call at their houses and play a game of + chess, asking after their belongings, and, should he learn that a child of + theirs was ill, prescribing the proper medicine. In short, he bore the + reputation of being a very good fellow. + </p> + <p> + On perceiving the feast to be ready, the host proposed that his guests + should finish their whist after luncheon; whereupon all proceeded to the + room whence for some time past an agreeable odour had been tickling the + nostrils of those present, and towards the door of which Sobakevitch in + particular had been glancing since the moment when he had caught sight of + a huge sturgeon reposing on the sideboard. After a glassful of warm, + olive-coloured vodka apiece—vodka of the tint to be seen only in the + species of Siberian stone whereof seals are cut—the company applied + themselves to knife-and-fork work, and, in so doing, evinced their several + characteristics and tastes. For instance, Sobakevitch, disdaining lesser + trifles, tackled the large sturgeon, and, during the time that his fellow + guests were eating minor comestibles, and drinking and talking, contrived + to consume more than a quarter of the whole fish; so that, on the host + remembering the creature, and, with fork in hand, leading the way in its + direction and saying, “What, gentlemen, think you of this striking product + of nature?” there ensued the discovery that of the said product of nature + there remained little beyond the tail, while Sobakevitch, with an air as + though at least HE had not eaten it, was engaged in plunging his fork into + a much more diminutive piece of fish which happened to be resting on an + adjacent platter. After his divorce from the sturgeon, Sobakevitch ate and + drank no more, but sat frowning and blinking in an armchair. + </p> + <p> + Apparently the host was not a man who believed in sparing the wine, for + the toasts drunk were innumerable. The first toast (as the reader may + guess) was quaffed to the health of the new landowner of Kherson; the + second to the prosperity of his peasants and their safe transferment; and + the third to the beauty of his future wife—a compliment which + brought to our hero’s lips a flickering smile. Lastly, he received from + the company a pressing, as well as an unanimous, invitation to extend his + stay in town for at least another fortnight, and, in the meanwhile, to + allow a wife to be found for him. + </p> + <p> + “Quite so,” agreed the President. “Fight us tooth and nail though you may, + we intend to have you married. You have happened upon us by chance, and + you shall have no reason to repent of it. We are in earnest on this + subject.” + </p> + <p> + “But why should I fight you tooth and nail?” said Chichikov, smiling. + “Marriage would not come amiss to me, were I but provided with a + betrothed.” + </p> + <p> + “Then a betrothed you shall have. Why not? We will do as you wish.” + </p> + <p> + “Very well,” assented Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Bravo, bravo!” the company shouted. “Long live Paul Ivanovitch! Hurrah! + Hurrah!” And with that every one approached to clink glasses with him, and + he readily accepted the compliment, and accepted it many times in + succession. Indeed, as the hours passed on, the hilarity of the company + increased yet further, and more than once the President (a man of great + urbanity when thoroughly in his cups) embraced the chief guest of the day + with the heartfelt words, “My dearest fellow! My own most precious of + friends!” Nay, he even started to crack his fingers, to dance around + Chichikov’s chair, and to sing snatches of a popular song. To the + champagne succeeded Hungarian wine, which had the effect of still further + heartening and enlivening the company. By this time every one had + forgotten about whist, and given himself up to shouting and disputing. + Every conceivable subject was discussed, including politics and military + affairs; and in this connection guests voiced jejune opinions for the + expression of which they would, at any other time, have soundly spanked + their offspring. Chichikov, like the rest, had never before felt so gay, + and, imagining himself really and truly to be a landowner of Kherson, + spoke of various improvements in agriculture, of the three-field system of + tillage <a href="#linknote-33" id="linknoteref-33"><small>33</small></a>, + and of the beatific felicity of a union between two kindred souls. Also, + he started to recite poetry to Sobakevitch, who blinked as he listened, + for he greatly desired to go to sleep. At length the guest of the evening + realised that matters had gone far enough, so begged to be given a lift + home, and was accommodated with the Public Prosecutor’s drozhki. Luckily + the driver of the vehicle was a practised man at his work, for, while + driving with one hand, he succeeded in leaning backwards and, with the + other, holding Chichikov securely in his place. Arrived at the inn, our + hero continued babbling awhile about a flaxen-haired damsel with rosy lips + and a dimple in her right cheek, about villages of his in Kherson, and + about the amount of his capital. Nay, he even issued seignorial + instructions that Selifan should go and muster the peasants about to be + transferred, and make a complete and detailed inventory of them. For a + while Selifan listened in silence; then he left the room, and instructed + Petrushka to help the barin to undress. As it happened, Chichikov’s boots + had no sooner been removed than he managed to perform the rest of his + toilet without assistance, to roll on to the bed (which creaked terribly + as he did so), and to sink into a sleep in every way worthy of a landowner + of Kherson. Meanwhile Petrushka had taken his master’s coat and trousers + of bilberry-coloured check into the corridor; where, spreading them over a + clothes’ horse, he started to flick and to brush them, and to fill the + whole corridor with dust. Just as he was about to replace them in his + master’s room he happened to glance over the railing of the gallery, and + saw Selifan returning from the stable. Glances were exchanged, and in an + instant the pair had arrived at an instinctive understanding—an + understanding to the effect that the barin was sound asleep, and that + therefore one might consider one’s own pleasure a little. Accordingly + Petrushka proceeded to restore the coat and trousers to their appointed + places, and then descended the stairs; whereafter he and Selifan left the + house together. Not a word passed between them as to the object of their + expedition. On the contrary, they talked solely of extraneous subjects. + Yet their walk did not take them far; it took them only to the other side + of the street, and thence into an establishment which immediately + confronted the inn. Entering a mean, dirty courtyard covered with glass, + they passed thence into a cellar where a number of customers were seated + around small wooden tables. What thereafter was done by Selifan and + Petrushka God alone knows. At all events, within an hour’s time they + issued, arm in arm, and in profound silence, yet remaining markedly + assiduous to one another, and ever ready to help one another around an + awkward corner. Still linked together—never once releasing their + mutual hold—they spent the next quarter of an hour in attempting to + negotiate the stairs of the inn; but at length even that ascent had been + mastered, and they proceeded further on their way. Halting before his mean + little pallet, Petrushka stood awhile in thought. His difficulty was how + best to assume a recumbent position. Eventually he lay down on his face, + with his legs trailing over the floor; after which Selifan also stretched + himself upon the pallet, with his head resting upon Petrushka’s stomach, + and his mind wholly oblivious of the fact that he ought not to have been + sleeping there at all, but in the servant’s quarters, or in the stable + beside his horses. Scarcely a moment had passed before the pair were + plunged in slumber and emitting the most raucous snores; to which their + master (next door) responded with snores of a whistling and nasal order. + Indeed, before long every one in the inn had followed their soothing + example, and the hostelry lay plunged in complete restfulness. Only in the + window of the room of the newly-arrived lieutenant from Riazan did a light + remain burning. Evidently he was a devotee of boots, for he had purchased + four pairs, and was now trying on a fifth. Several times he approached the + bed with a view to taking off the boots and retiring to rest; but each + time he failed, for the reason that the boots were so alluring in their + make that he had no choice but to lift up first one foot, and then the + other, for the purpose of scanning their elegant welts. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0008"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER VIII + </h3> + <p> + It was not long before Chichikov’s purchases had become the talk of the + town; and various were the opinions expressed as to whether or not it was + expedient to procure peasants for transferment. Indeed such was the + interest taken by certain citizens in the matter that they advised the + purchaser to provide himself and his convoy with an escort, in order to + ensure their safe arrival at the appointed destination; but though + Chichikov thanked the donors of this advice for the same, and declared + that he should be very glad, in case of need, to avail himself of it, he + declared also that there was no real need for an escort, seeing that the + peasants whom he had purchased were exceptionally peace-loving folk, and + that, being themselves consenting parties to the transferment, they would + undoubtedly prove in every way tractable. + </p> + <p> + One particularly good result of this advertisement of his scheme was that + he came to rank as neither more nor less than a millionaire. Consequently, + much as the inhabitants had liked our hero in the first instance (as seen + in Chapter I.), they now liked him more than ever. As a matter of fact, + they were citizens of an exceptionally quiet, good-natured, easy-going + disposition; and some of them were even well-educated. For instance, the + President of the Local Council could recite the whole of Zhukovski’s + LUDMILLA by heart, and give such an impressive rendering of the passage + “The pine forest was asleep and the valley at rest” (as well as of the + exclamation “Phew!”) that one felt, as he did so, that the pine forest and + the valley really WERE as he described them. The effect was also further + heightened by the manner in which, at such moments, he assumed the most + portentous frown. For his part, the Postmaster went in more for + philosophy, and diligently perused such works as Young’s Night Thoughts, + and Eckharthausen’s A Key to the Mysteries of Nature; of which latter work + he would make copious extracts, though no one had the slightest notion + what they referred to. For the rest, he was a witty, florid little + individual, and much addicted to a practice of what he called + “embellishing” whatsoever he had to say—a feat which he performed + with the aid of such by-the-way phrases as “my dear sir,” “my good + So-and-So,” “you know,” “you understand,” “you may imagine,” “relatively + speaking,” “for instance,” and “et cetera”; of which phrases he would add + sackfuls to his speech. He could also “embellish” his words by the simple + expedient of half-closing, half-winking one eye; which trick communicated + to some of his satirical utterances quite a mordant effect. Nor were his + colleagues a wit inferior to him in enlightenment. For instance, one of + them made a regular practice of reading Karamzin, another of conning the + Moscow Gazette, and a third of never looking at a book at all. Likewise, + although they were the sort of men to whom, in their more intimate + movements, their wives would very naturally address such nicknames as + “Toby Jug,” “Marmot,” “Fatty,” “Pot Belly,” “Smutty,” “Kiki,” and + “Buzz-Buzz,” they were men also of good heart, and very ready to extend + their hospitality and their friendship when once a guest had eaten of + their bread and salt, or spent an evening in their company. Particularly, + therefore, did Chichikov earn these good folk’s approval with his taking + methods and qualities—so much so that the expression of that + approval bid fair to make it difficult for him to quit the town, seeing + that, wherever he went, the one phrase dinned into his ears was “Stay + another week with us, Paul Ivanovitch.” In short, he ceased to be a free + agent. But incomparably more striking was the impression (a matter for + unbounded surprise!) which he produced upon the ladies. Properly to + explain this phenomenon I should need to say a great deal about the ladies + themselves, and to describe in the most vivid of colours their social + intercourse and spiritual qualities. Yet this would be a difficult thing + for me to do, since, on the one hand, I should be hampered by my boundless + respect for the womenfolk of all Civil Service officials, and, on the + other hand—well, simply by the innate arduousness of the task. The + ladies of N. were—But no, I cannot do it; my heart has already + failed me. Come, come! The ladies of N. were distinguished for—But + it is of no use; somehow my pen seems to refuse to move over the paper—it + seems to be weighted as with a plummet of lead. Very well. That being so, + I will merely say a word or two concerning the most prominent tints on the + feminine palette of N.—merely a word or two concerning the outward + appearance of its ladies, and a word or two concerning their more + superficial characteristics. The ladies of N. were pre-eminently what is + known as “presentable.” Indeed, in that respect they might have served as + a model to the ladies of many another town. That is to say, in whatever + pertained to “tone,” etiquette, the intricacies of decorum, and strict + observance of the prevailing mode, they surpassed even the ladies of + Moscow and St. Petersburg, seeing that they dressed with taste, drove + about in carriages in the latest fashions, and never went out without the + escort of a footman in gold-laced livery. Again, they looked upon a + visiting card—even upon a make-shift affair consisting of an ace of + diamonds or a two of clubs—as a sacred thing; so sacred that on one + occasion two closely related ladies who had also been closely attached + friends were known to fall out with one another over the mere fact of an + omission to return a social call! Yes, in spite of the best efforts of + husbands and kinsfolk to reconcile the antagonists, it became clear that, + though all else in the world might conceivably be possible, never could + the hatchet be buried between ladies who had quarrelled over a neglected + visit. Likewise strenuous scenes used to take place over questions of + precedence—scenes of a kind which had the effect of inspiring + husbands to great and knightly ideas on the subject of protecting the + fair. True, never did a duel actually take place, since all the husbands + were officials belonging to the Civil Service; but at least a given + combatant would strive to heap contumely upon his rival, and, as we all + know, that is a resource which may prove even more effectual than a duel. + As regards morality, the ladies of N. were nothing if not censorious, and + would at once be fired with virtuous indignation when they heard of a case + of vice or seduction. Nay, even to mere frailty they would award the lash + without mercy. On the other hand, should any instance of what they called + “third personism” occur among THEIR OWN circle, it was always kept dark—not + a hint of what was going on being allowed to transpire, and even the + wronged husband holding himself ready, should he meet with, or hear of, + the “third person,” to quote, in a mild and rational manner, the proverb, + “Whom concerns it that a friend should consort with friend?” In addition, + I may say that, like most of the female world of St. Petersburg, the + ladies of N. were pre-eminently careful and refined in their choice of + words and phrases. Never did a lady say, “I blew my nose,” or “I + perspired,” or “I spat.” No, it had to be, “I relieved my nose through the + expedient of wiping it with my handkerchief,” and so forth. Again, to say, + “This glass, or this plate, smells badly,” was forbidden. No, not even a + hint to such an effect was to be dropped. Rather, the proper phrase, in + such a case, was “This glass, or this plate, is not behaving very well,”—or + some such formula. + </p> + <p> + In fact, to refine the Russian tongue the more thoroughly, something like + half the words in it were cut out: which circumstance necessitated very + frequent recourse to the tongue of France, since the same words, if spoken + in French, were another matter altogether, and one could use even blunter + ones than the ones originally objected to. + </p> + <p> + So much for the ladies of N., provided that one confines one’s + observations to the surface; yet hardly need it be said that, should one + penetrate deeper than that, a great deal more would come to light. At the + same time, it is never a very safe proceeding to peer deeply into the + hearts of ladies; wherefore, restricting ourselves to the foregoing + superficialities, let us proceed further on our way. + </p> + <p> + Hitherto the ladies had paid Chichikov no particular attention, though + giving him full credit for his gentlemanly and urbane demeanour; but from + the moment that there arose rumours of his being a millionaire other + qualities of his began to be canvassed. Nevertheless, not ALL the ladies + were governed by interested motives, since it is due to the term + “millionaire” rather than to the character of the person who bears it, + that the mere sound of the word exercises upon rascals, upon decent folk, + and upon folk who are neither the one nor the other, an undeniable + influence. A millionaire suffers from the disadvantage of everywhere + having to behold meanness, including the sort of meanness which, though + not actually based upon calculations of self-interest, yet runs after the + wealthy man with smiles, and doffs his hat, and begs for invitations to + houses where the millionaire is known to be going to dine. That a similar + inclination to meanness seized upon the ladies of N. goes without saying; + with the result that many a drawing-room heard it whispered that, if + Chichikov was not exactly a beauty, at least he was sufficiently + good-looking to serve for a husband, though he could have borne to have + been a little more rotund and stout. To that there would be added scornful + references to lean husbands, and hints that they resembled tooth-brushes + rather than men—with many other feminine additions. Also, such + crowds of feminine shoppers began to repair to the Bazaar as almost to + constitute a crush, and something like a procession of carriages ensued, + so long grew the rank of vehicles. For their part, the tradesmen had the + joy of seeing highly priced dress materials which they had bought at + fairs, and then been unable to dispose of, now suddenly become tradeable, + and go off with a rush. For instance, on one occasion a lady appeared at + Mass in a bustle which filled the church to an extent which led the verger + on duty to bid the commoner folk withdraw to the porch, lest the lady’s + toilet should be soiled in the crush. Even Chichikov could not help + privately remarking the attention which he aroused. On one occasion, when + he returned to the inn, he found on his table a note addressed to himself. + Whence it had come, and who had delivered it, he failed to discover, for + the waiter declared that the person who had brought it had omitted to + leave the name of the writer. Beginning abruptly with the words “I MUST + write to you,” the letter went on to say that between a certain pair of + souls there existed a bond of sympathy; and this verity the epistle + further confirmed with rows of full stops to the extent of nearly half a + page. Next there followed a few reflections of a correctitude so + remarkable that I have no choice but to quote them. “What, I would ask, is + this life of ours?” inquired the writer. “’Tis nought but a vale of woe. + And what, I would ask, is the world? ’Tis nought but a mob of unthinking + humanity.” Thereafter, incidentally remarking that she had just dropped a + tear to the memory of her dear mother, who had departed this life + twenty-five years ago, the (presumably) lady writer invited Chichikov to + come forth into the wilds, and to leave for ever the city where, penned in + noisome haunts, folk could not even draw their breath. In conclusion, the + writer gave way to unconcealed despair, and wound up with the following + verses: + </p> +<p class="poetry"> + “Two turtle doves to thee, one day,<br> + My dust will show, congealed in death;<br> + And, cooing wearily, they’ll say:<br> + ‘In grief and loneliness she drew her closing breath.’” + </p> + <p> + True, the last line did not scan, but that was a trifle, since the + quatrain at least conformed to the mode then prevalent. Neither signature + nor date were appended to the document, but only a postscript expressing a + conjecture that Chichikov’s own heart would tell him who the writer was, + and stating, in addition, that the said writer would be present at the + Governor’s ball on the following night. + </p> + <p> + This greatly interested Chichikov. Indeed, there was so much that was + alluring and provocative of curiosity in the anonymous missive that he + read it through a second time, and then a third, and finally said to + himself: “I SHOULD like to know who sent it!” In short, he took the thing + seriously, and spent over an hour in considering the same. At length, + muttering a comment upon the epistle’s efflorescent style, he refolded the + document, and committed it to his dispatch-box in company with a play-bill + and an invitation to a wedding—the latter of which had for the last + seven years reposed in the self-same receptacle and in the self-same + position. Shortly afterwards there arrived a card of invitation to the + Governor’s ball already referred to. In passing, it may be said that such + festivities are not infrequent phenomena in county towns, for the reason + that where Governors exist there must take place balls if from the local + gentry there is to be evoked that respectful affection which is every + Governor’s due. + </p> + <p> + Thenceforth all extraneous thoughts and considerations were laid aside in + favour of preparing for the coming function. Indeed, this conjunction of + exciting and provocative motives led to Chichikov devoting to his toilet + an amount of time never witnessed since the creation of the world. Merely + in the contemplation of his features in the mirror, as he tried to + communicate to them a succession of varying expressions, was an hour + spent. First of all he strove to make his features assume an air of + dignity and importance, and then an air of humble, but faintly satirical, + respect, and then an air of respect guiltless of any alloy whatsoever. + Next, he practised performing a series of bows to his reflection, + accompanied with certain murmurs intended to bear a resemblance to a + French phrase (though Chichikov knew not a single word of the Gallic + tongue). Lastly came the performing of a series of what I might call + “agreeable surprises,” in the shape of twitchings of the brow and lips and + certain motions of the tongue. In short, he did all that a man is apt to + do when he is not only alone, but also certain that he is handsome and + that no one is regarding him through a chink. Finally he tapped himself + lightly on the chin, and said, “Ah, good old face!” In the same way, when + he started to dress himself for the ceremony, the level of his high + spirits remained unimpaired throughout the process. That is to say, while + adjusting his braces and tying his tie, he shuffled his feet in what was + not exactly a dance, but might be called the entr’acte of a dance: which + performance had the not very serious result of setting a wardrobe + a-rattle, and causing a brush to slide from the table to the floor. + </p> + <p> + Later, his entry into the ballroom produced an extraordinary effect. Every + one present came forward to meet him, some with cards in their hands, and + one man even breaking off a conversation at the most interesting point—namely, + the point that “the Inferior Land Court must be made responsible for + everything.” Yes, in spite of the responsibility of the Inferior Land + Court, the speaker cast all thoughts of it to the winds as he hurried to + greet our hero. From every side resounded acclamations of welcome, and + Chichikov felt himself engulfed in a sea of embraces. Thus, scarcely had + he extricated himself from the arms of the President of the Local Council + when he found himself just as firmly clasped in the arms of the Chief of + Police, who, in turn, surrendered him to the Inspector of the Medical + Department, who, in turn, handed him over to the Commissioner of Taxes, + who, again, committed him to the charge of the Town Architect. Even the + Governor, who hitherto had been standing among his womenfolk with a box of + sweets in one hand and a lap-dog in the other, now threw down both sweets + and lap-dog (the lap-dog giving vent to a yelp as he did so) and added his + greeting to those of the rest of the company. Indeed, not a face was there + to be seen on which ecstatic delight—or, at all events, the + reflection of other people’s ecstatic delight—was not painted. The + same expression may be discerned on the faces of subordinate officials + when, the newly arrived Director having made his inspection, the said + officials are beginning to get over their first sense of awe on perceiving + that he has found much to commend, and that he can even go so far as to + jest and utter a few words of smiling approval. Thereupon every tchinovnik + responds with a smile of double strength, and those who (it may be) have + not heard a single word of the Director’s speech smile out of sympathy + with the rest, and even the gendarme who is posted at the distant door—a + man, perhaps, who has never before compassed a smile, but is more + accustomed to dealing out blows to the populace—summons up a kind of + grin, even though the grin resembles the grimace of a man who is about to + sneeze after inadvertently taking an over-large pinch of snuff. To all and + sundry Chichikov responded with a bow, and felt extraordinarily at his + ease as he did so. To right and left did he incline his head in the + sidelong, yet unconstrained, manner that was his wont and never failed to + charm the beholder. As for the ladies, they clustered around him in a + shining bevy that was redolent of every species of perfume—of roses, + of spring violets, and of mignonette; so much so that instinctively + Chichikov raised his nose to snuff the air. Likewise the ladies’ dresses + displayed an endless profusion of taste and variety; and though the + majority of their wearers evinced a tendency to embonpoint, those wearers + knew how to call upon art for the concealment of the fact. Confronting + them, Chichikov thought to himself: “Which of these beauties is the writer + of the letter?” Then again he snuffed the air. When the ladies had, to a + certain extent, returned to their seats, he resumed his attempts to + discern (from glances and expressions) which of them could possibly be the + unknown authoress. Yet, though those glances and expressions were too + subtle, too insufficiently open, the difficulty in no way diminished his + high spirits. Easily and gracefully did he exchange agreeable bandinage + with one lady, and then approach another one with the short, mincing steps + usually affected by young-old dandies who are fluttering around the fair. + As he turned, not without dexterity, to right and left, he kept one leg + slightly dragging behind the other, like a short tail or comma. This trick + the ladies particularly admired. In short, they not only discovered in him + a host of recommendations and attractions, but also began to see in his + face a sort of grand, Mars-like, military expression—a thing which, + as we know, never fails to please the feminine eye. Certain of the ladies + even took to bickering over him, and, on perceiving that he spent most of + his time standing near the door, some of their number hastened to occupy + chairs nearer to his post of vantage. In fact, when a certain dame chanced + to have the good fortune to anticipate a hated rival in the race there + very nearly ensued a most lamentable scene—which, to many of those + who had been desirous of doing exactly the same thing, seemed a peculiarly + horrible instance of brazen-faced audacity. + </p> + <p> + So deeply did Chichikov become plunged in conversation with his fair + pursuers—or rather, so deeply did those fair pursuers enmesh him in + the toils of small talk (which they accomplished through the expedient of + asking him endless subtle riddles which brought the sweat to his brow in + his attempts to guess them)—that he forgot the claims of courtesy + which required him first of all to greet his hostess. In fact, he + remembered those claims only on hearing the Governor’s wife herself + addressing him. She had been standing before him for several minutes, and + now greeted him with suave expressement and the words, “So HERE you are, + Paul Ivanovitch!” But what she said next I am not in a position to report, + for she spoke in the ultra-refined tone and vein wherein ladies and + gentlemen customarily express themselves in high-class novels which have + been written by experts more qualified than I am to describe salons, and + able to boast of some acquaintance with good society. In effect, what the + Governor’s wife said was that she hoped—she greatly hoped—that + Monsieur Chichikov’s heart still contained a corner—even the + smallest possible corner—for those whom he had so cruelly forgotten. + Upon that Chichikov turned to her, and was on the point of returning a + reply at least no worse than that which would have been returned, under + similar circumstances, by the hero of a fashionable novelette, when he + stopped short, as though thunderstruck. + </p> + <p> + Before him there was standing not only Madame, but also a young girl whom + she was holding by the hand. The golden hair, the fine-drawn, delicate + contours, the face with its bewitching oval—a face which might have + served as a model for the countenance of the Madonna, since it was of a + type rarely to be met with in Russia, where nearly everything, from plains + to human feet, is, rather, on the gigantic scale; these features, I say, + were those of the identical maiden whom Chichikov had encountered on the + road when he had been fleeing from Nozdrev’s. His emotion was such that he + could not formulate a single intelligible syllable; he could merely murmur + the devil only knows what, though certainly nothing of the kind which + would have risen to the lips of the hero of a fashionable novel. + </p> + <p> + “I think that you have not met my daughter before?” said Madame. “She is + just fresh from school.” + </p> + <p> + He replied that he HAD had the happiness of meeting Mademoiselle before, + and under rather unexpected circumstances; but on his trying to say + something further his tongue completely failed him. The Governor’s wife + added a word or two, and then carried off her daughter to speak to some of + the other guests. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov stood rooted to the spot, like a man who, after issuing into the + street for a pleasant walk, has suddenly come to a halt on remembering + that something has been left behind him. In a moment, as he struggles to + recall what that something is, the mien of careless expectancy disappears + from his face, and he no longer sees a single person or a single object in + his vicinity. In the same way did Chichikov suddenly become oblivious to + the scene around him. Yet all the while the melodious tongues of ladies + were plying him with multitudinous hints and questions—hints and + questions inspired with a desire to captivate. “Might we poor cumberers of + the ground make so bold as to ask you what you are thinking of?” “Pray + tell us where lie the happy regions in which your thoughts are wandering?” + “Might we be informed of the name of her who has plunged you into this + sweet abandonment of meditation?”—such were the phrases thrown at + him. But to everything he turned a dead ear, and the phrases in question + might as well have been stones dropped into a pool. Indeed, his rudeness + soon reached the pitch of his walking away altogether, in order that he + might go and reconnoitre wither the Governor’s wife and daughter had + retreated. But the ladies were not going to let him off so easily. Every + one of them had made up her mind to use upon him her every weapon, and to + exhibit whatsoever might chance to constitute her best point. Yet the + ladies’ wiles proved useless, for Chichikov paid not the smallest + attention to them, even when the dancing had begun, but kept raising + himself on tiptoe to peer over people’s heads and ascertain in which + direction the bewitching maiden with the golden hair had gone. Also, when + seated, he continued to peep between his neighbours’ backs and shoulders, + until at last he discovered her sitting beside her mother, who was wearing + a sort of Oriental turban and feather. Upon that one would have thought + that his purpose was to carry the position by storm; for, whether moved by + the influence of spring, or whether moved by a push from behind, he + pressed forward with such desperate resolution that his elbow caused the + Commissioner of Taxes to stagger on his feet, and would have caused him to + lose his balance altogether but for the supporting row of guests in the + rear. Likewise the Postmaster was made to give ground; whereupon he turned + and eyed Chichikov with mingled astonishment and subtle irony. But + Chichikov never even noticed him; he saw in the distance only the + golden-haired beauty. At that moment she was drawing on a long glove and, + doubtless, pining to be flying over the dancing-floor, where, with + clicking heels, four couples had now begun to thread the mazes of the + mazurka. In particular was a military staff-captain working body and soul + and arms and legs to compass such a series of steps as were never before + performed, even in a dream. However, Chichikov slipped past the mazurka + dancers, and, almost treading on their heels, made his way towards the + spot where Madame and her daughter were seated. Yet he approached them + with great diffidence and none of his late mincing and prancing. Nay, he + even faltered as he walked; his every movement had about it an air of + awkwardness. + </p> + <p> + It is difficult to say whether or not the feeling which had awakened in + our hero’s breast was the feeling of love; for it is problematical whether + or not men who are neither stout nor thin are capable of any such + sentiment. Nevertheless, something strange, something which he could not + altogether explain, had come upon him. It seemed as though the ball, with + its talk and its clatter, had suddenly become a thing remote—that + the orchestra had withdrawn behind a hill, and the scene grown misty, like + the carelessly painted-in background of a picture. And from that misty + void there could be seen glimmering only the delicate outlines of the + bewitching maiden. Somehow her exquisite shape reminded him of an ivory + toy, in such fair, white, transparent relief did it stand out against the + dull blur of the surrounding throng. + </p> + <p> + Herein we see a phenomenon not infrequently observed—the phenomenon + of the Chichikovs of this world becoming temporarily poets. At all events, + for a moment or two our Chichikov felt that he was a young man again, if + not exactly a military officer. On perceiving an empty chair beside the + mother and daughter, he hastened to occupy it, and though conversation at + first hung fire, things gradually improved, and he acquired more + confidence. + </p> + <p> + At this point I must reluctantly deviate to say that men of weight and + high office are always a trifle ponderous when conversing with ladies. + Young lieutenants—or, at all events, officers not above the rank of + captain—are far more successful at the game. How they contrive to be + so God only knows. Let them but make the most inane of remarks, and at + once the maiden by their side will be rocking with laughter; whereas, + should a State Councillor enter into conversation with a damsel, and + remark that the Russian Empire is one of vast extent, or utter a + compliment which he has elaborated not without a certain measure of + intelligence (however strongly the said compliment may smack of a book), + of a surety the thing will fall flat. Even a witticism from him will be + laughed at far more by him himself than it will by the lady who may happen + to be listening to his remarks. + </p> + <p> + These comments I have interposed for the purpose of explaining to the + reader why, as our hero conversed, the maiden began to yawn. Blind to + this, however, he continued to relate to her sundry adventures which had + befallen him in different parts of the world. Meanwhile (as need hardly be + said) the rest of the ladies had taken umbrage at his behaviour. One of + them purposely stalked past him to intimate to him the fact, as well as to + jostle the Governor’s daughter, and let the flying end of a scarf flick + her face; while from a lady seated behind the pair came both a whiff of + violets and a very venomous and sarcastic remark. Nevertheless, either he + did not hear the remark or he PRETENDED not to hear it. This was unwise of + him, since it never does to disregard ladies’ opinions. Later—but too late—he + was destined to learn this to his cost. + </p> + <p> + In short, dissatisfaction began to display itself on every feminine face. + No matter how high Chichikov might stand in society, and no matter how + much he might be a millionaire and include in his expression of + countenance an indefinable element of grandness and martial ardour, there + are certain things which no lady will pardon, whosoever be the person + concerned. We know that at Governor’s balls it is customary for the + onlookers to compose verses at the expense of the dancers; and in this + case the verses were directed to Chichikov’s address. Briefly, the + prevailing dissatisfaction grew until a tacit edict of proscription had + been issued against both him and the poor young maiden. + </p> + <p> + But an even more unpleasant surprise was in store for our hero; for whilst + the young lady was still yawning as Chichikov recounted to her certain of + his past adventures and also touched lightly upon the subject of Greek + philosophy, there appeared from an adjoining room the figure of Nozdrev. + Whether he had come from the buffet, or whether he had issued from a + little green retreat where a game more strenuous than whist had been in + progress, or whether he had left the latter resort unaided, or whether he + had been expelled therefrom, is unknown; but at all events when he entered + the ballroom, he was in an elevated condition, and leading by the arm the + Public Prosecutor, whom he seemed to have been dragging about for a long + while past, seeing that the poor man was glancing from side to side as + though seeking a means of putting an end to this personally conducted + tour. Certainly he must have found the situation almost unbearable, in + view of the fact that, after deriving inspiration from two glasses of tea + not wholly undiluted with rum, Nozdrev was engaged in lying unmercifully. + On sighting him in the distance, Chichikov at once decided to sacrifice + himself. That is to say, he decided to vacate his present enviable + position and make off with all possible speed, since he could see that an + encounter with the newcomer would do him no good. Unfortunately at that + moment the Governor buttonholed him with a request that he would come and + act as arbiter between him (the Governor) and two ladies—the subject + of dispute being the question as to whether or not woman’s love is + lasting. Simultaneously Nozdrev descried our hero and bore down upon him. + </p> + <p> + “Ah, my fine landowner of Kherson!” he cried with a smile which set his + fresh, spring-rose-pink cheeks a-quiver. “Have you been doing much trade + in departed souls lately?” With that he turned to the Governor. “I suppose + your Excellency knows that this man traffics in dead peasants?” he bawled. + “Look here, Chichikov. I tell you in the most friendly way possible that + every one here likes you—yes, including even the Governor. + Nevertheless, had I my way, I would hang you! Yes, by God I would!” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov’s discomfiture was complete. + </p> + <p> + “And, would you believe it, your Excellency,” went on Nozdrev, “but this + fellow actually said to me, ‘Sell me your dead souls!’ Why, I laughed till + I nearly became as dead as the souls. And, behold, no sooner do I arrive + here than I am told that he has bought three million roubles’ worth of + peasants for transferment! For transferment, indeed! And he wanted to + bargain with me for my DEAD ones! Look here, Chichikov. You are a swine! + Yes, by God, you are an utter swine! Is not that so, your Excellency? Is + not that so, friend Prokurator <a href="#linknote-34" id="linknoteref-34"><small>34</small></a>?” + </p> + <p> + But both his Excellency, the Public Prosecutor, and Chichikov were too + taken aback to reply. The half-tipsy Nozdrev, without noticing them, + continued his harangue as before. + </p> + <p> + “Ah, my fine sir!” he cried. “THIS time I don’t mean to let you go. No, + not until I have learnt what all this purchasing of dead peasants means. + Look here. You ought to be ashamed of yourself. Yes, <i>I</i> say that—<i>I</i> + who am one of your best friends.” Here he turned to the Governor again. + “Your Excellency,” he continued, “you would never believe what + inseperables this man and I have been. Indeed, if you had stood there and + said to me, ‘Nozdrev, tell me on your honour which of the two you love + best—your father or Chichikov?’ I should have replied, ‘Chichikov, + by God!’” With that he tackled our hero again, “Come, come, my friend!” he + urged. “Let me imprint upon your cheeks a baiser or two. You will excuse + me if I kiss him, will you not, your Excellency? No, do not resist me, + Chichikov, but allow me to imprint at least one baiser upon your + lily-white cheek.” And in his efforts to force upon Chichikov what he + termed his “baisers” he came near to measuring his length upon the floor. + </p> + <p> + Every one now edged away, and turned a deaf ear to his further babblings; + but his words on the subject of the purchase of dead souls had none the + less been uttered at the top of his voice, and been accompanied with such + uproarious laughter that the curiosity even of those who had happened to + be sitting or standing in the remoter corners of the room had been + aroused. So strange and novel seemed the idea that the company stood with + faces expressive of nothing but a dumb, dull wonder. Only some of the + ladies (as Chichikov did not fail to remark) exchanged meaning, + ill-natured winks and a series of sarcastic smiles: which circumstance + still further increased his confusion. That Nozdrev was a notorious liar + every one, of course, knew, and that he should have given vent to an + idiotic outburst of this sort had surprised no one; but a dead soul—well, + what was one to make of Nozdrev’s reference to such a commodity? + </p> + <p> + Naturally this unseemly contretemps had greatly upset our hero; for, + however foolish be a madman’s words, they may yet prove sufficient to sow + doubt in the minds of saner individuals. He felt much as does a man who, + shod with well-polished boots, has just stepped into a dirty, stinking + puddle. He tried to put away from him the occurrence, and to expand, and + to enjoy himself once more. Nay, he even took a hand at whist. But all was + of no avail—matters kept going as awry as a badly-bent hoop. Twice + he blundered in his play, and the President of the Council was at a loss + to understand how his friend, Paul Ivanovitch, lately so good and so + circumspect a player, could perpetrate such a mauvais pas as to throw away + a particular king of spades which the President has been “trusting” as (to + quote his own expression) “he would have trusted God.” At supper, too, + matters felt uncomfortable, even though the society at Chichikov’s table + was exceedingly agreeable and Nozdrev had been removed, owing to the fact + that the ladies had found his conduct too scandalous to be borne, now that + the delinquent had taken to seating himself on the floor and plucking at + the skirts of passing lady dancers. As I say, therefore, Chichikov found + the situation not a little awkward, and eventually put an end to it by + leaving the supper room before the meal was over, and long before the hour + when usually he returned to the inn. + </p> + <p> + In his little room, with its door of communication blocked with a + wardrobe, his frame of mind remained as uncomfortable as the chair in + which he was seated. His heart ached with a dull, unpleasant sensation, + with a sort of oppressive emptiness. + </p> + <p> + “The devil take those who first invented balls!” was his reflection. “Who + derives any real pleasure from them? In this province there exist want and + scarcity everywhere: yet folk go in for balls! How absurd, too, were those + overdressed women! One of them must have had a thousand roubles on her + back, and all acquired at the expense of the overtaxed peasant, or, worse + still, at that of the conscience of her neighbour. Yes, we all know why + bribes are accepted, and why men become crooked in soul. It is all done to + provide wives—yes, may the pit swallow them up!—with fal-lals. + And for what purpose? That some woman may not have to reproach her husband + with the fact that, say, the Postmaster’s wife is wearing a better dress + than she is—a dress which has cost a thousand roubles! ‘Balls and + gaiety, balls and gaiety’ is the constant cry. Yet what folly balls are! + They do not consort with the Russian spirit and genius, and the devil only + knows why we have them. A grown, middle-aged man—a man dressed in + black, and looking as stiff as a poker—suddenly takes the floor and + begins shuffling his feet about, while another man, even though conversing + with a companion on important business, will, the while, keep capering to + right and left like a billy-goat! Mimicry, sheer mimicry! The fact that + the Frenchman is at forty precisely what he was at fifteen leads us to + imagine that we too, forsooth, ought to be the same. No; a ball leaves one + feeling that one has done a wrong thing—so much so that one does not + care even to think of it. It also leaves one’s head perfectly empty, even + as does the exertion of talking to a man of the world. A man of that kind + chatters away, and touches lightly upon every conceivable subject, and + talks in smooth, fluent phrases which he has culled from books without + grazing their substance; whereas go and have a chat with a tradesman who + knows at least ONE thing thoroughly, and through the medium of experience, + and see whether his conversation will not be worth more than the prattle + of a thousand chatterboxes. For what good does one get out of balls? + Suppose that a competent writer were to describe such a scene exactly as + it stands? Why, even in a book it would seem senseless, even as it + certainly is in life. Are, therefore, such functions right or wrong? One + would answer that the devil alone knows, and then spit and close the + book.” + </p> + <p> + Such were the unfavourable comments which Chichikov passed upon balls in + general. With it all, however, there went a second source of + dissatisfaction. That is to say, his principal grudge was not so much + against balls as against the fact that at this particular one he had been + exposed, he had been made to disclose the circumstance that he had been + playing a strange, an ambiguous part. Of course, when he reviewed the + contretemps in the light of pure reason, he could not but see that it + mattered nothing, and that a few rude words were of no account now that + the chief point had been attained; yet man is an odd creature, and + Chichikov actually felt pained by the cold-shouldering administered to + him by persons for whom he had not an atom of respect, and whose vanity + and love of display he had only that moment been censuring. Still more, on + viewing the matter clearly, he felt vexed to think that he himself had + been so largely the cause of the catastrophe. + </p> + <p> + Yet he was not angry with HIMSELF—of that you may be sure, seeing + that all of us have a slight weakness for sparing our own faults, and + always do our best to find some fellow-creature upon whom to vent our + displeasure—whether that fellow-creature be a servant, a subordinate + official, or a wife. In the same way Chichikov sought a scapegoat upon + whose shoulders he could lay the blame for all that had annoyed him. He + found one in Nozdrev, and you may be sure that the scapegoat in question + received a good drubbing from every side, even as an experienced captain + or chief of police will give a knavish starosta or postboy a rating not + only in the terms become classical, but also in such terms as the said + captain or chief of police may invent for himself. In short, Nozdrev’s + whole lineage was passed in review; and many of its members in the + ascending line fared badly in the process. + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile, at the other end of the town there was in progress an event + which was destined to augment still further the unpleasantness of our + hero’s position. That is to say, through the outlying streets and alleys + of the town there was clattering a vehicle to which it would be difficult + precisely to assign a name, seeing that, though it was of a species + peculiar to itself, it most nearly resembled a large, rickety water melon + on wheels. Eventually this monstrosity drew up at the gates of a house + where the archpriest of one of the churches resided, and from its doors + there leapt a damsel clad in a jerkin and wearing a scarf over her head. + For a while she thumped the gates so vigorously as to set all the dogs + barking; then the gates stiffly opened, and admitted this unwieldy + phenomenon of the road. Lastly, the barinia herself alighted, and stood + revealed as Madame Korobotchka, widow of a Collegiate Secretary! The + reason of her sudden arrival was that she had felt so uneasy about the + possible outcome of Chichikov’s whim, that during the three nights + following his departure she had been unable to sleep a wink; whereafter, + in spite of the fact that her horses were not shod, she had set off for + the town, in order to learn at first hand how the dead souls were faring, + and whether (which might God forfend!) she had not sold them at something + like a third of their true value. The consequences of her venture the + reader will learn from a conversation between two ladies. We will reserve + it for the ensuing chapter. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0009"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER IX + </h3> + <p> + Next morning, before the usual hour for paying calls, there tripped from + the portals of an orange-coloured wooden house with an attic storey and a + row of blue pillars a lady in an elegant plaid cloak. With her came a + footman in a many-caped greatcoat and a polished top hat with a gold band. + Hastily, but gracefully, the lady ascended the steps let down from a + koliaska which was standing before the entrance, and as soon as she had + done so the footman shut her in, put up the steps again, and, catching + hold of the strap behind the vehicle, shouted to the coachman, “Right + away!” The reason of all this was that the lady was the possessor of a + piece of intelligence that she was burning to communicate to a + fellow-creature. Every moment she kept looking out of the carriage window, + and perceiving, with almost speechless vexation, that, as yet, she was but + half-way on her journey. The fronts of the houses appeared to her longer + than usual, and in particular did the front of the white stone hospital, + with its rows of narrow windows, seem interminable to a degree which at + length forced her to ejaculate: “Oh, the cursed building! Positively there + is no end to it!” Also, she twice adjured the coachman with the words, “Go + quicker, Andrusha! You are a horribly long time over the journey this + morning.” But at length the goal was reached, and the koliaska stopped + before a one-storied wooden mansion, dark grey in colour, and having white + carvings over the windows, a tall wooden fence and narrow garden in front + of the latter, and a few meagre trees looming white with an incongruous + coating of road dust. In the windows of the building were also a few + flower pots and a parrot that kept alternately dancing on the floor of its + cage and hanging on to the ring of the same with its beak. Also, in the + sunshine before the door two pet dogs were sleeping. Here there lived the + lady’s bosom friend. As soon as the bosom friend in question learnt of the + newcomer’s arrival, she ran down into the hall, and the two ladies kissed + and embraced one another. Then they adjourned to the drawing-room. + </p> + <p> + “How glad I am to see you!” said the bosom friend. “When I heard some one + arriving I wondered who could possibly be calling so early. Parasha + declared that it must be the Vice-Governor’s wife, so, as I did not want + to be bored with her, I gave orders that I was to be reported ‘not at + home.’” + </p> + <p> + For her part, the guest would have liked to have proceeded to business by + communicating her tidings, but a sudden exclamation from the hostess + imparted (temporarily) a new direction to the conversation. + </p> + <p> + “What a pretty chintz!” she cried, gazing at the other’s gown. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, it IS pretty,” agreed the visitor. “On the other hand, Praskovia + Thedorovna thinks that—” + </p> + <p> + In other words, the ladies proceeded to indulge in a conversation on the + subject of dress; and only after this had lasted for a considerable while + did the visitor let fall a remark which led her entertainer to inquire: + </p> + <p> + “And how is the universal charmer?” + </p> + <p> + “My God!” replied the other. “There has been SUCH a business! In fact, do + you know why I am here at all?” And the visitor’s breathing became more + hurried, and further words seemed to be hovering between her lips like + hawks preparing to stoop upon their prey. Only a person of the unhumanity + of a “true friend” would have had the heart to interrupt her; but the + hostess was just such a friend, and at once interposed with: + </p> + <p> + “I wonder how any one can see anything in the man to praise or to admire. + For my own part, I think—and I would say the same thing straight to + his face—that he is a perfect rascal.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but do listen to what I have got to tell you.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, I know that some people think him handsome,” continued the hostess, + unmoved; “but <i>I</i> say that he is nothing of the kind—that, in + particular, his nose is perfectly odious.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but let me finish what I was saying.” The guest’s tone was almost + piteous in its appeal. + </p> + <p> + “What is it, then?” + </p> + <p> + “You cannot imagine my state of mind! You see, this morning I received a + visit from Father Cyril’s wife—the Archpriest’s wife—you know + her, don’t you? Well, whom do you suppose that fine gentleman visitor of + ours has turned out to be?” + </p> + <p> + “The man who has built the Archpriest a poultry-run?” + </p> + <p> + “Oh dear no! Had that been all, it would have been nothing. No. Listen to + what Father Cyril’s wife had to tell me. She said that, last night, a lady + landowner named Madame Korobotchka arrived at the Archpriest’s house—arrived + all pale and trembling—and told her, oh, such things! They sound + like a piece out of a book. That is to say, at dead of night, just when + every one had retired to rest, there came the most dreadful knocking + imaginable, and some one screamed out, ‘Open the gates, or we will break + them down!’ Just think! After this, how any one can say that the man is + charming I cannot imagine.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, what of Madame Korobotchka? Is she a young woman or good looking?” + </p> + <p> + “Oh dear no! Quite an old woman.” + </p> + <p> + “Splendid indeed! So he is actually engaged to a person like that? One may + heartily commend the taste of our ladies for having fallen in love with + him!” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless, it is not as you suppose. Think, now! Armed with weapons + from head to foot, he called upon this old woman, and said: ‘Sell me any + souls of yours which have lately died.’ Of course, Madame Korobotchka + answered, reasonably enough: ‘I cannot sell you those souls, seeing that + they have departed this world;’ but he replied: ‘No, no! They are NOT + dead. ’Tis I who tell you that—I who ought to know the truth of the + matter. I swear that they are still alive.’ In short, he made such a scene + that the whole village came running to the house, and children screamed, + and men shouted, and no one could tell what it was all about. The affair + seemed to me so horrible, so utterly horrible, that I trembled beyond + belief as I listened to the story. ‘My dearest madam,’ said my maid, + Mashka, ‘pray look at yourself in the mirror, and see how white you are.’ + ‘But I have no time for that,’ I replied, ‘as I must be off to tell my + friend, Anna Grigorievna, the news.’ Nor did I lose a moment in ordering + the koliaska. Yet when my coachman, Andrusha, asked me for directions I + could not get a word out—I just stood staring at him like a fool, + until I thought he must think me mad. Oh, Anna Grigorievna, if you but + knew how upset I am!” + </p> + <p> + “What a strange affair!” commented the hostess. “What on earth can the man + have meant by ‘dead souls’? I confess that the words pass my + understanding. Curiously enough, this is the second time I have heard + speak of those souls. True, my husband avers that Nozdrev was lying; yet + in his lies there seems to have been a grain of truth.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, just think of my state when I heard all this! ‘And now,’ apparently + said Korobotchka to the Archpriest’s wife, ‘I am altogether at a loss what + to do, for, throwing me fifteen roubles, the man forced me to sign a + worthless paper—yes, me, an inexperienced, defenceless widow who + knows nothing of business.’ That such things should happen! TRY and + imagine my feelings!” + </p> + <p> + “In my opinion, there is in this more than the dead souls which meet the + eye.” + </p> + <p> + “I think so too,” agreed the other. As a matter of fact, her friend’s + remark had struck her with complete surprise, as well as filled her with + curiosity to know what the word “more” might possibly signify. In fact, + she felt driven to inquire: “What do YOU suppose to be hidden beneath it + all?” + </p> + <p> + “No; tell me what YOU suppose?” + </p> + <p> + “What <i>I</i> suppose? I am at a loss to conjecture.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but tell me what is in your mind?” + </p> + <p> + Upon this the visitor had to confess herself nonplussed; for, though + capable of growing hysterical, she was incapable of propounding any + rational theory. Consequently she felt the more that she needed tender + comfort and advice. + </p> + <p> + “Then THIS is what I think about the dead souls,” said the hostess. + Instantly the guest pricked up her ears (or, rather, they pricked + themselves up) and straightened herself and became, somehow, more modish, + and, despite her not inconsiderable weight, posed herself to look like a + piece of thistledown floating on the breeze. + </p> + <p> + “The dead souls,” began the hostess. + </p> + <p> + “Are what, are what?” inquired the guest in great excitement. + </p> + <p> + “Are, are—” + </p> + <p> + “Tell me, tell me, for heaven’s sake!” + </p> + <p> + “They are an invention to conceal something else. The man’s real object + is, is—TO ABDUCT THE GOVERNOR’S DAUGHTER.” + </p> + <p> + So startling and unexpected was this conclusion that the guest sat reduced + to a state of pale, petrified, genuine amazement. + </p> + <p> + “My God!” she cried, clapping her hands, “I should NEVER have guessed it!” + </p> + <p> + “Well, to tell you the truth, I guessed it as soon as ever you opened your + mouth.” + </p> + <p> + “So much, then, for educating girls like the Governor’s daughter at + school! Just see what comes of it!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, indeed! And they tell me that she says things which I hesitate even + to repeat.” + </p> + <p> + “Truly it wrings one’s heart to see to what lengths immorality has come.” + </p> + <p> + “Some of the men have quite lost their heads about her, but for my part I + think her not worth noticing.” + </p> + <p> + “Of course. And her manners are unbearable. But what puzzles me most is + how a travelled man like Chichikov could come to let himself in for such + an affair. Surely he must have accomplices?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes; and I should say that one of those accomplices is Nozdrev.” + </p> + <p> + “Surely not?” + </p> + <p> + “CERTAINLY I should say so. Why, I have known him even try to sell his own + father! At all events he staked him at cards.” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed? You interest me. I should never had thought him capable of such + things.” + </p> + <p> + “I always guessed him to be so.” + </p> + <p> + The two ladies were still discussing the matter with acumen and success + when there walked into the room the Public Prosecutor—bushy + eyebrows, motionless features, blinking eyes, and all. At once the ladies + hastened to inform him of the events related, adducing therewith full + details both as to the purchase of dead souls and as to the scheme to + abduct the Governor’s daughter; after which they departed in different + directions, for the purpose of raising the rest of the town. For the + execution of this undertaking not more than half an hour was required. So + thoroughly did they succeed in throwing dust in the public’s eyes that for + a while every one—more especially the army of public officials—was + placed in the position of a schoolboy who, while still asleep, has had a + bag of pepper thrown in his face by a party of more early-rising comrades. + The questions now to be debated resolved themselves into two—namely, + the question of the dead souls and the question of the Governor’s + daughter. To this end two parties were formed—the men’s party and + the feminine section. The men’s party—the more absolutely senseless + of the two—devoted its attention to the dead souls: the women’s + party occupied itself exclusively with the alleged abduction of the + Governor’s daughter. And here it may be said (to the ladies’ credit) that + the women’s party displayed far more method and caution than did its rival + faction, probably because the function in life of its members had always + been that of managing and administering a household. With the ladies, + therefore, matters soon assumed vivid and definite shape; they became + clearly and irrefutably materialised; they stood stripped of all doubt and + other impedimenta. Said some of the ladies in question, Chichikov had long + been in love with the maiden, and the pair had kept tryst by the light of + the moon, while the Governor would have given his consent (seeing that + Chichikov was as rich as a Jew) but for the obstacle that Chichikov had + deserted a wife already (how the worthy dames came to know that he was + married remains a mystery), and the said deserted wife, pining with love + for her faithless husband, had sent the Governor a letter of the most + touching kind, so that Chichikov, on perceiving that the father and mother + would never give their consent, had decided to abduct the girl. In other + circles the matter was stated in a different way. That is to say, this + section averred that Chichikov did NOT possess a wife, but that, as a man + of subtlety and experience, he had bethought him of obtaining the + daughter’s hand through the expedient of first tackling the mother and + carrying on with her an ardent liaison, and that, thereafter, he had made + an application for the desired hand, but that the mother, fearing to + commit a sin against religion, and feeling in her heart certain gnawings + of conscience, had returned a blank refusal to Chichikov’s request; + whereupon Chichikov had decided to carry out the abduction alleged. To the + foregoing, of course, there became appended various additional proofs and + items of evidence, in proportion as the sensation spread to more remote + corners of the town. At length, with these perfectings, the affair reached + the ears of the Governor’s wife herself. Naturally, as the mother of a + family, and as the first lady in the town, and as a matron who had never + before been suspected of things of the kind, she was highly offended when + she heard the stories, and very justly so: with the result that her poor + young daughter, though innocent, had to endure about as unpleasant a + tete-a-tete as ever befell a maiden of sixteen, while, for his part, the + Swiss footman received orders never at any time to admit Chichikov to the + house. + </p> + <p> + Having done their business with the Governor’s wife, the ladies’ party + descended upon the male section, with a view to influencing it to their + own side by asserting that the dead souls were an invention used solely + for the purpose of diverting suspicion and successfully affecting the + abduction. And, indeed, more than one man was converted, and joined the + feminine camp, in spite of the fact that thereby such seceders incurred + strong names from their late comrades—names such as “old women,” + “petticoats,” and others of a nature peculiarly offensive to the male sex. + </p> + <p> + Also, however much they might arm themselves and take the field, the men + could not compass such orderliness within their ranks as could the women. + With the former everything was of the antiquated and rough-hewn and + ill-fitting and unsuitable and badly-adapted and inferior kind; their + heads were full of nothing but discord and triviality and confusion and + slovenliness of thought. In brief, they displayed everywhere the male + bent, the rude, ponderous nature which is incapable either of managing a + household or of jumping to a conclusion, as well as remains always + distrustful and lazy and full of constant doubt and everlasting timidity. + For instance, the men’s party declared that the whole story was rubbish—that + the alleged abduction of the Governor’s daughter was the work rather of a + military than of a civilian culprit; that the ladies were lying when they + accused Chichikov of the deed; that a woman was like a money-bag—whatsoever + you put into her she thenceforth retained; that the subject which really + demanded attention was the dead souls, of which the devil only knew the + meaning, but in which there certainly lurked something that was contrary + to good order and discipline. One reason why the men’s party was so + certain that the dead souls connoted something contrary to good order and + discipline, was that there had just been appointed to the province a new + Governor-General—an event which, of course, had thrown the whole + army of provincial tchinovniks into a state of great excitement, seeing + that they knew that before long there would ensue transferments and + sentences of censure, as well as the series of official dinners with which + a Governor-General is accustomed to entertain his subordinates. “Alas,” + thought the army of tchinovniks, “it is probable that, should he learn of + the gross reports at present afloat in our town, he will make such a fuss + that we shall never hear the last of them.” In particular did the Director + of the Medical Department turn pale at the thought that possibly the new + Governor-General would surmise the term “dead folk” to connote patients in + the local hospitals who, for want of proper preventative measures, had + died of sporadic fever. Indeed, might it not be that Chichikov was neither + more nor less than an emissary of the said Governor-General, sent to + conduct a secret inquiry? Accordingly he (the Director of the Medical + Department) communicated this last supposition to the President of the + Council, who, though at first inclined to ejaculate “Rubbish!” suddenly + turned pale on propounding to himself the theory. “What if the souls + purchased by Chichikov should REALLY be dead ones?”—a terrible + thought considering that he, the President, had permitted their + transferment to be registered, and had himself acted as Plushkin’s + representative! What if these things should reach the Governor-General’s + ears? He mentioned the matter to one friend and another, and they, in + their turn, went white to the lips, for panic spreads faster and is even + more destructive, than the dreaded black death. Also, to add to the + tchinovniks’ troubles, it so befell that just at this juncture there came + into the local Governor’s hands two documents of great importance. The + first of them contained advices that, according to received evidence and + reports, there was operating in the province a forger of rouble-notes who + had been passing under various aliases and must therefore be sought for + with the utmost diligence; while the second document was a letter from the + Governor of a neighbouring province with regard to a malefactor who had + there evaded apprehension—a letter conveying also a warning that, if + in the province of the town of N. there should appear any suspicious + individual who could produce neither references nor passports, he was to + be arrested forthwith. These two documents left every one thunderstruck, + for they knocked on the head all previous conceptions and theories. Not + for a moment could it be supposed that the former document referred to + Chichikov; yet, as each man pondered the position from his own point of + view, he remembered that no one REALLY knew who Chichikov was; as also + that his vague references to himself had—yes!—included + statements that his career in the service had suffered much to the cause + of Truth, and that he possessed a number of enemies who were seeking his + life. This gave the tchinovniks further food for thought. Perhaps his life + really DID stand in danger? Perhaps he really WAS being sought for by some + one? Perhaps he really HAD done something of the kind above referred to? + As a matter of fact, who was he?—not that it could actually be + supposed that he was a forger of notes, still less a brigand, seeing that + his exterior was respectable in the highest degree. Yet who was he? At + length the tchinovniks decided to make enquiries among those of whom he + had purchased souls, in order that at least it might be learnt what the + purchases had consisted of, and what exactly underlay them, and whether, + in passing, he had explained to any one his real intentions, or revealed + to any one his identity. In the first instance, therefore, resort was had + to Korobotchka. Yet little was gleaned from that source—merely a + statement that he had bought of her some souls for fifteen roubles apiece, + and also a quantity of feathers, while promising also to buy some other + commodities in the future, seeing that, in particular, he had entered into + a contract with the Treasury for lard, a fact constituting fairly + presumptive proof that the man was a rogue, seeing that just such another + fellow had bought a quantity of feathers, yet had cheated folk all round, + and, in particular, had done the Archpriest out of over a hundred roubles. + Thus the net result of Madame’s cross-examination was to convince the + tchinovniks that she was a garrulous, silly old woman. With regard to + Manilov, he replied that he would answer for Chichikov as he would for + himself, and that he would gladly sacrifice his property in toto if + thereby he could attain even a tithe of the qualities which Paul + Ivanovitch possessed. Finally, he delivered on Chichikov, with + acutely-knitted brows, a eulogy couched in the most charming of terms, and + coupled with sundry sentiments on the subject of friendship and affection + in general. True, these remarks sufficed to indicate the tender impulses + of the speaker’s heart, but also they did nothing to enlighten his + examiners concerning the business that was actually at hand. As for + Sobakevitch, that landowner replied that he considered Chichikov an + excellent fellow, as well as that the souls whom he had sold to his + visitor had been in the truest sense of the word alive, but that he could + not answer for anything which might occur in the future, seeing that any + difficulties which might arise in the course of the actual transferment of + souls would not be HIS fault, in view of the fact that God was lord of + all, and that fevers and other mortal complaints were so numerous in the + world, and that instances of whole villages perishing through the same + could be found on record. + </p> + <p> + Finally, our friends the tchinovniks found themselves compelled to resort + to an expedient which, though not particularly savoury, is not + infrequently employed—namely, the expedient of getting lacqueys + quietly to approach the servants of the person concerning whom information + is desired, and to ascertain from them (the servants) certain details with + regard to their master’s life and antecedents. Yet even from this source + very little was obtained, since Petrushka provided his interrogators + merely with a taste of the smell of his living-room, and Selifan confined + his replies to a statement that the barin had “been in the employment of + the State, and also had served in the Customs.” + </p> + <p> + In short, the sum total of the results gathered by the tchinovniks was + that they still stood in ignorance of Chichikov’s identity, but that he + MUST be some one; wherefore it was decided to hold a final debate on the + subject on what ought to be done, and who Chichikov could possibly be, and + whether or not he was a man who ought to be apprehended and detained as + not respectable, or whether he was a man who might himself be able to + apprehend and detain THEM as persons lacking in respectability. The debate + in question, it was proposed, should be held at the residence of the Chief + of Police, who is known to our readers as the father and the general + benefactor of the town. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0010"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER X + </h3> + <p> + On assembling at the residence indicated, the tchinovniks had occasion to + remark that, owing to all these cares and excitements, every one of their + number had grown thinner. Yes, the appointment of a new Governor-General, + coupled with the rumours described and the reception of the two serious + documents above-mentioned, had left manifest traces upon the features of + every one present. More than one frockcoat had come to look too large for + its wearer, and more than one frame had fallen away, including the frames + of the President of the Council, the Director of the Medical Department, + and the Public Prosecutor. Even a certain Semen Ivanovitch, who, for some + reason or another, was never alluded to by his family name, but who wore + on his index finger a ring with which he was accustomed to dazzle his lady + friends, had diminished in bulk. Yet, as always happens at such junctures, + there were also present a score of brazen individuals who had succeeded in + NOT losing their presence of mind, even though they constituted a mere + sprinkling. Of them the Postmaster formed one, since he was a man of + equable temperament who could always say: “WE know you, Governor-Generals! + We have seen three or four of you come and go, whereas WE have been + sitting on the same stools these thirty years.” Nevertheless a prominent + feature of the gathering was the total absence of what is vulgarly known + as “common sense.” In general, we Russians do not make a good show at + representative assemblies, for the reason that, unless there be in + authority a leading spirit to control the rest, the affair always develops + into confusion. Why this should be so one could hardly say, but at all + events a success is scored only by such gatherings as have for their + object dining and festivity—to wit, gatherings at clubs or in + German-run restaurants. However, on the present occasion, the meeting was + NOT one of this kind; it was a meeting convoked of necessity, and likely + in view of the threatened calamity to affect every tchinovnik in the + place. Also, in addition to the great divergency of views expressed + thereat, there was visible in all the speakers an invincible tendency to + indecision which led them at one moment to make assertions, and at the + next to contradict the same. But on at least one point all seemed to agree—namely, + that Chichikov’s appearance and conversation were too respectable for him + to be a forger or a disguised brigand. That is to say, all SEEMED to agree + on the point; until a sudden shout arose from the direction of the + Postmaster, who for some time past had been sitting plunged in thought. + </p> + <p> + “<i>I</i> can tell you,” he cried, “who Chichikov is!” + </p> + <p> + “Who, then?” replied the crowd in great excitement. + </p> + <p> + “He is none other than Captain Kopeikin.” + </p> + <p> + “And who may Captain Kopeikin be?” + </p> + <p> + Taking a pinch of snuff (which he did with the lid of his snuff-box + half-open, lest some extraneous person should contrive to insert a not + over-clean finger into the stuff), the Postmaster related the following + story <a href="#linknote-35" id="linknoteref-35"><small>35</small></a>. + </p> + <p> + “After fighting in the campaign of 1812, there was sent home, wounded, a + certain Captain Kopeikin—a headstrong, lively blade who, whether on + duty or under arrest, made things lively for everybody. Now, since at + Krasni or at Leipzig (it matters not which) he had lost an arm and a leg, + and in those days no provision was made for wounded soldiers, and he could + not work with his left arm alone, he set out to see his father. + Unfortunately his father could only just support himself, and was forced + to tell his son so; wherefore the Captain decided to go and apply for help + in St. Petersburg, seeing that he had risked his life for his country, and + had lost much blood in its service. You can imagine him arriving in the + capital on a baggage waggon—in the capital which is like no other + city in the world! Before him there lay spread out the whole field of + life, like a sort of Arabian Nights—a picture made up of the Nevski + Prospect, Gorokhovaia Street, countless tapering spires, and a number of + bridges apparently supported on nothing—in fact, a regular second + Nineveh. Well, he made shift to hire a lodging, but found everything so + wonderfully furnished with blinds and Persian carpets and so forth that he + saw it would mean throwing away a lot of money. True, as one walks the + streets of St. Petersburg one seems to smell money by the thousand + roubles, but our friend Kopeikin’s bank was limited to a few score coppers + and a little silver—not enough to buy a village with! At length, at + the price of a rouble a day, he obtained a lodging in the sort of tavern + where the daily ration is a bowl of cabbage soup and a crust of bread; and + as he felt that he could not manage to live very long on fare of that kind + he asked folk what he had better do. ‘What you had better do?’ they said. + ‘Well the Government is not here—it is in Paris, and the troops have + not yet returned from the war; but there is a TEMPORARY Commission + sitting, and you had better go and see what IT can do for you.’ ‘All + right!’ he said. ‘I will go and tell the Commission that I have shed my + blood, and sacrificed my life, for my country.’ And he got up early one + morning, and shaved himself with his left hand (since the expense of a + barber was not worth while), and set out, wooden leg and all, to see the + President of the Commission. But first he asked where the President lived, + and was told that his house was in Naberezhnaia Street. And you may be + sure that it was no peasant’s hut, with its glazed windows and great + mirrors and statues and lacqueys and brass door handles! Rather, it was + the sort of place which you would enter only after you had bought a cheap + cake of soap and indulged in a two hours’ wash. Also, at the entrance + there was posted a grand Swiss footman with a baton and an embroidered + collar—a fellow looking like a fat, over-fed pug dog. However, + friend Kopeikin managed to get himself and his wooden leg into the + reception room, and there squeezed himself away into a corner, for fear + lest he should knock down the gilded china with his elbow. And he stood + waiting in great satisfaction at having arrived before the President had + so much as left his bed and been served with his silver wash-basin. + Nevertheless, it was only when Kopeikin had been waiting four hours that a + breakfast waiter entered to say, ‘The President will soon be here.’ By now + the room was as full of people as a plate is of beans, and when the + President left the breakfast-room he brought with him, oh, such dignity + and refinement, and such an air of the metropolis! First he walked up to + one person, and then up to another, saying: ‘What do YOU want? And what do + YOU want? What can I do for YOU? What is YOUR business?’ And at length he + stopped before Kopeikin, and Kopeikin said to him: ‘I have shed my blood, + and lost both an arm and a leg, for my country, and am unable to work. + Might I therefore dare to ask you for a little help, if the regulations + should permit of it, or for a gratuity, or for a pension, or something of + the kind?’ Then the President looked at him, and saw that one of his legs + was indeed a wooden one, and that an empty right sleeve was pinned to his + uniform. ‘Very well,’ he said. ‘Come to me again in a few days’ time.’ + Upon this friend Kopeikin felt delighted. ‘NOW I have done my job!’ he + thought to himself; and you may imagine how gaily he trotted along the + pavement, and how he dropped into a tavern for a glass of vodka, and how + he ordered a cutlet and some caper sauce and some other things for + luncheon, and how he called for a bottle of wine, and how he went to the + theatre in the evening! In short, he did himself thoroughly well. Next, he + saw in the street a young English lady, as graceful as a swan, and set off + after her on his wooden leg. ‘But no,’ he thought to himself. ‘To the + devil with that sort of thing just now! I will wait until I have drawn my + pension. For the present I have spent enough.’ (And I may tell you that by + now he had got through fully half his money.) Two or three days later he + went to see the President of the Commission again. ‘I should be glad to + know,’ he said, ‘whether by now you can do anything for me in return for + my having shed my blood and suffered sickness and wounds on military + service.’ ‘First of all,’ said the President, ‘I must tell you that + nothing can be decided in your case without the authority of the Supreme + Government. Without that sanction we cannot move in the matter. Surely you + see how things stand until the army shall have returned from the war? All + that I can advise you to do is wait for the Minister to return, and, in + the meanwhile, to have patience. Rest assured that then you will not be + overlooked. And if for the moment you have nothing to live upon, this is + the best that I can do for you.’ With that he handed Kopeikin a trifle + until his case should have been decided. However, that was not what + Kopeikin wanted. He had supposed that he would be given a gratuity of a + thousand roubles straight away; whereas, instead of ‘Drink and be merry,’ + it was ‘Wait, for the time is not yet.’ Thus, though his head had been + full of soup plates and cutlets and English girls, he now descended the + steps with his ears and his tail down—looking, in fact, like a + poodle over which the cook has poured a bucketful of water. You see, St. + Petersburg life had changed him not a little since first he had got a + taste of it, and, now that the devil only knew how he was going to live, + it came all the harder to him that he should have no more sweets to look + forward to. Remember that a man in the prime of years has an appetite like + a wolf; and as he passed a restaurant he could see a round-faced, + holland-shirted, snow-white aproned fellow of a French chef preparing a + dish delicious enough to make it turn to and eat itself; while, again, as + he passed a fruit shop he could see delicacies looking out of a window for + fools to come and buy them at a hundred roubles apiece. Imagine, + therefore, his position! On the one hand, so to speak, were salmon and + water-melons, while on the other hand was the bitter fare which passed at + a tavern for luncheon. ‘Well,’ he thought to himself, ‘let them do what + they like with me at the Commission, but I intend to go and raise the + whole place, and to tell every blessed functionary there that I have a + mind to do as I choose.’ And in truth this bold impertinence of a man did + have the hardihood to return to the Commission. ‘What do you want?’ said + the President. ‘Why are you here for the third time? You have had your + orders given you.’ ‘I daresay I have,’ he retorted, ‘but I am not going to + be put off with THEM. I want some cutlets to eat, and a bottle of French + wine, and a chance to go and amuse myself at the theatre.’ ‘Pardon me,’ + said the President. ‘What you really need (if I may venture to mention it) + is a little patience. You have been given something for food until the + Military Committee shall have met, and then, doubtless, you will receive + your proper reward, seeing that it would not be seemly that a man who has + served his country should be left destitute. On the other hand, if, in the + meanwhile, you desire to indulge in cutlets and theatre-going, please + understand that we cannot help you, but you must make your own resources, + and try as best you can to help yourself.’ You can imagine that this went + in at one of Kopeikin’s ears, and out at the other; that it was like + shooting peas at a stone wall. Accordingly he raised a turmoil which sent + the staff flying. One by one, he gave the mob of secretaries and clerks a + real good hammering. ‘You, and you, and you,’ he said, ‘do not even know + your duties. You are law-breakers.’ Yes, he trod every man of them under + foot. At length the General himself arrived from another office, and + sounded the alarm. What was to be done with a fellow like Kopeikin? The + President saw that strong measures were imperative. ‘Very well,’ he said. + ‘Since you decline to rest satisfied with what has been given you, and + quietly to await the decision of your case in St. Petersburg, I must find + you a lodging. Here, constable, remove the man to gaol.’ Then a constable + who had been called to the door—a constable three ells in height, + and armed with a carbine—a man well fitted to guard a bank—placed + our friend in a police waggon. ‘Well,’ reflected Kopeikin, ‘at least I + shan’t have to pay my fare for THIS ride. That’s one comfort.’ Again, + after he had ridden a little way, he said to himself: ‘they told me at the + Commission to go and make my own means of enjoying myself. Very good. I’ll + do so.’ However, what became of Kopeikin, and whither he went, is known to + no one. He sank, to use the poet’s expression, into the waters of Lethe, + and his doings now lie buried in oblivion. But allow me, gentlemen, to + piece together the further threads of the story. Not two months later + there appeared in the forests of Riazan a band of robbers: and of that + band the chieftain was none other than—” + </p> + <p> + “Allow me,” put in the Head of the Police Department. “You have said that + Kopeikin had lost an arm and a leg; whereas Chichikov—” + </p> + <p> + To say anything more was unnecessary. The Postmaster clapped his hand to + his forehead, and publicly called himself a fool, though, later, he tried + to excuse his mistake by saying that in England the science of mechanics + had reached such a pitch that wooden legs were manufactured which would + enable the wearer, on touching a spring, to vanish instantaneously from + sight. + </p> + <p> + Various other theories were then propounded, among them a theory that + Chichikov was Napoleon, escaped from St. Helena and travelling about the + world in disguise. And if it should be supposed that no such notion could + possibly have been broached, let the reader remember that these events + took place not many years after the French had been driven out of Russia, + and that various prophets had since declared that Napoleon was Antichrist, + and would one day escape from his island prison to exercise universal sway + on earth. Nay, some good folk had even declared the letters of Napoleon’s + name to constitute the Apocalyptic cipher! + </p> + <p> + As a last resort, the tchinovniks decided to question Nozdrev, since not + only had the latter been the first to mention the dead souls, but also he + was supposed to stand on terms of intimacy with Chichikov. Accordingly the + Chief of Police dispatched a note by the hand of a commissionaire. At the + time Nozdrev was engaged on some very important business—so much so + that he had not left his room for four days, and was receiving his meals + through the window, and no visitors at all. The business referred to + consisted of the marking of several dozen selected cards in such a way as + to permit of his relying upon them as upon his bosom friend. Naturally he + did not like having his retirement invaded, and at first consigned the + commissionaire to the devil; but as soon as he learnt from the note that, + since a novice at cards was to be the guest of the Chief of Police that + evening, a call at the latter’s house might prove not wholly unprofitable + he relented, unlocked the door of his room, threw on the first garments + that came to hand, and set forth. To every question put to him by the + tchinovniks he answered firmly and with assurance. Chichikov, he averred, + had indeed purchased dead souls, and to the tune of several thousand + roubles. In fact, he (Nozdrev) had himself sold him some, and still saw no + reason why he should not have done so. Next, to the question of whether or + not he considered Chichikov to be a spy, he replied in the affirmative, + and added that, as long ago as his and Chichikov’s joint schooldays, the + said Chichikov had been known as “The Informer,” and repeatedly been + thrashed by his companions on that account. Again, to the question of + whether or not Chichikov was a forger of currency notes the deponent, as + before, responded in the affirmative, and appended thereto an anecdote + illustrative of Chichikov’s extraordinary dexterity of hand—namely, + an anecdote to that effect that, once upon a time, on learning that two + million roubles worth of counterfeit notes were lying in Chichikov’s + house, the authorities had placed seals upon the building, and had + surrounded it on every side with an armed guard; whereupon Chichikov had, + during the night, changed each of these seals for a new one, and also so + arranged matters that, when the house was searched, the forged notes were + found to be genuine ones! + </p> + <p> + Again, to the question of whether or not Chichikov had schemed to abduct + the Governor’s daughter, and also whether it was true that he, Nozdrev, + had undertaken to aid and abet him in the act, the witness replied that, + had he not undertaken to do so, the affair would never have come off. At + this point the witness pulled himself up, on realising that he had told a + lie which might get him into trouble; but his tongue was not to be denied—the + details trembling on its tip were too alluring, and he even went on to + cite the name of the village church where the pair had arranged to be + married, that of the priest who had performed the ceremony, the amount of + the fees paid for the same (seventy-five roubles), and statements (1) that + the priest had refused to solemnise the wedding until Chichikov had + frightened him by threatening to expose the fact that he (the priest) had + married Mikhail, a local corn dealer, to his paramour, and (2) that + Chichikov had ordered both a koliaska for the couple’s conveyance and + relays of horses from the post-houses on the road. Nay, the narrative, as + detailed by Nozdrev, even reached the point of his mentioning certain of + the postillions by name! Next, the tchinovniks sounded him on the question + of Chichikov’s possible identity with Napoleon; but before long they had + reason to regret the step, for Nozdrev responded with a rambling rigmarole + such as bore no resemblance to anything possibly conceivable. Finally, the + majority of the audience left the room, and only the Chief of Police + remained to listen (in the hope of gathering something more); but at last + even he found himself forced to disclaim the speaker with a gesture which + said: “The devil only knows what the fellow is talking about!” and so + voiced the general opinion that it was no use trying to gather figs of + thistles. + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile Chichikov knew nothing of these events; for, having contracted a + slight chill, coupled with a sore throat, he had decided to keep his room + for three days; during which time he gargled his throat with milk and fig + juice, consumed the fruit from which the juice had been extracted, and + wore around his neck a poultice of camomile and camphor. Also, to while + away the hours, he made new and more detailed lists of the souls which he + had bought, perused a work by the Duchesse de la Valliere <a + href="#linknote-36" id="linknoteref-36"><small>36</small></a>, + rummaged in his portmanteau, looked through various articles and papers + which he discovered in his dispatch-box, and found every one of these + occupations tedious. Nor could he understand why none of his official + friends had come to see him and inquire after his health, seeing that, not + long since, there had been standing in front of the inn the drozhkis both + of the Postmaster, the Public Prosecutor, and the President of the + Council. He wondered and wondered, and then, with a shrug of his + shoulders, fell to pacing the room. At length he felt better, and his + spirits rose at the prospect of once more going out into the fresh air; + wherefore, having shaved a plentiful growth of hair from his face, he + dressed with such alacrity as almost to cause a split in his trousers, + sprinkled himself with eau-de-Cologne, and wrapping himself in warm + clothes, and turning up the collar of his coat, sallied forth into the + street. His first destination was intended to be the Governor’s mansion, + and, as he walked along, certain thoughts concerning the Governor’s + daughter would keep whirling through his head, so that almost he forgot + where he was, and took to smiling and cracking jokes to himself. + </p> + <p> + Arrived at the Governor’s entrance, he was about to divest himself of his + scarf when a Swiss footman greeted him with the words, “I am forbidden to + admit you.” + </p> + <p> + “What?” he exclaimed. “You do not know me? Look at me again, and see if + you do not recognise me.” + </p> + <p> + “Of course I recognise you,” the footman replied. “I have seen you before, + but have been ordered to admit any one else rather than Monsieur + Chichikov.” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed? And why so?” + </p> + <p> + “Those are my orders, and they must be obeyed,” said the footman, + confronting Chichikov with none of that politeness with which, on former + occasions, he had hastened to divest our hero of his wrappings. Evidently + he was of opinion that, since the gentry declined to receive the visitor, + the latter must certainly be a rogue. + </p> + <p> + “I cannot understand it,” said Chichikov to himself. Then he departed, and + made his way to the house of the President of the Council. But so put + about was that official by Chichikov’s entry that he could not utter two + consecutive words—he could only murmur some rubbish which left both + his visitor and himself out of countenance. Chichikov wondered, as he left + the house, what the President’s muttered words could have meant, but + failed to make head or tail of them. Next, he visited, in turn, the Chief + of Police, the Vice-Governor, the Postmaster, and others; but in each case + he either failed to be accorded admittance or was received so strangely, + and with such a measure of constraint and conversational awkwardness and + absence of mind and embarrassment, that he began to fear for the sanity of + his hosts. Again and again did he strive to divine the cause, but could + not do so; so he went wandering aimlessly about the town, without + succeeding in making up his mind whether he or the officials had gone + crazy. At length, in a state bordering upon bewilderment, he returned to + the inn—to the establishment whence, that every afternoon, he had + set forth in such exuberance of spirits. Feeling the need of something to + do, he ordered tea, and, still marvelling at the strangeness of his + position, was about to pour out the beverage when the door opened and + Nozdrev made his appearance. + </p> + <p> + “What says the proverb?” he began. “‘To see a friend, seven versts is not + too long a round to make.’ I happened to be passing the house, saw a light + in your window, and thought to myself: ‘Now, suppose I were to run up and + pay him a visit? It is unlikely that he will be asleep.’ Ah, ha! I see tea + on your table! Good! Then I will drink a cup with you, for I had wretched + stuff for dinner, and it is beginning to lie heavy on my stomach. Also, + tell your man to fill me a pipe. Where is your own pipe?” + </p> + <p> + “I never smoke,” rejoined Chichikov drily. + </p> + <p> + “Rubbish! As if I did not know what a chimney-pot you are! What is your + man’s name? Hi, Vakhramei! Come here!” + </p> + <p> + “Petrushka is his name, not Vakhramei.” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed? But you USED to have a man called Vakhramei, didn’t you?” + </p> + <p> + “No, never.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, well. Then it must be Derebin’s man I am thinking of. What a lucky + fellow that Derebin is! An aunt of his has gone and quarrelled with her + son for marrying a serf woman, and has left all her property to HIM, to + Derebin. Would that <i>I</i> had an aunt of that kind to provide against + future contingencies! But why have you been hiding yourself away? I + suppose the reason has been that you go in for abstruse subjects and are + fond of reading” (why Nozdrev should have drawn these conclusions no one + could possibly have said—least of all Chichikov himself). “By the + way, I can tell you of something that would have found you scope for your + satirical vein” (the conclusion as to Chichikov’s “satirical vein” was, as + before, altogether unwarranted on Nozdrev’s part). “That is to say, you + would have seen merchant Likhachev losing a pile of money at play. My + word, you would have laughed! A fellow with me named Perependev said: + ‘Would that Chichikov had been here! It would have been the very thing for + him!’” (As a matter of fact, never since the day of his birth had Nozdrev + met any one of the name of Perependev.) “However, my friend, you must + admit that you treated me rather badly the day that we played that game of + chess; but, as I won the game, I bear you no malice. A propos, I am just + from the President’s, and ought to tell you that the feeling against you + in the town is very strong, for every one believes you to be a forger of + currency notes. I myself was sent for and questioned about you, but I + stuck up for you through thick and thin, and told the tchinovniks that I + had been at school with you, and had known your father. In fact, I gave + the fellows a knock or two for themselves.” + </p> + <p> + “You say that I am believed to be a forger?” said Chichikov, starting from + his seat. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” said Nozdrev. “Why have you gone and frightened everybody as you + have done? Some of our folk are almost out of their minds about it, and + declare you to be either a brigand in disguise or a spy. Yesterday the + Public Prosecutor even died of it, and is to be buried to-morrow” (this + was true in so far as that, on the previous day, the official in question + had had a fatal stroke—probably induced by the excitement of the + public meeting). “Of course, <i>I</i> don’t suppose you to be anything of + the kind, but, you see, these fellows are in a blue funk about the new + Governor-General, for they think he will make trouble for them over your + affair. A propos, he is believed to be a man who puts on airs, and turns + up his nose at everything; and if so, he will get on badly with the + dvoriane, seeing that fellows of that sort need to be humoured a bit. Yes, + my word! Should the new Governor-General shut himself up in his study, and + give no balls, there will be the very devil to pay! By the way, Chichikov, + that is a risky scheme of yours.” + </p> + <p> + “What scheme to you mean?” Chichikov asked uneasily. + </p> + <p> + “Why, that scheme of carrying off the Governor’s daughter. However, to + tell the truth, I was expecting something of the kind. No sooner did I see + you and her together at the ball than I said to myself: ‘Ah, ha! Chichikov + is not here for nothing!’ For my own part, I think you have made a poor + choice, for I can see nothing in her at all. On the other hand, the niece + of a friend of mine named Bikusov—she IS a girl, and no mistake! A + regular what you might call ‘miracle in muslin!’” + </p> + <p> + “What on earth are you talking about?” asked Chichikov with his eyes + distended. “HOW could I carry off the Governor’s daughter? What on earth + do you mean?” + </p> + <p> + “Come, come! What a secretive fellow you are! My only object in having + come to see you is to lend you a helping hand in the matter. Look here. On + condition that you will lend me three thousand roubles, I will stand you + the cost of the wedding, the koliaska, and the relays of horses. I must + have the money even if I die for it.” + </p> + <p> + Throughout Nozdrev’s maunderings Chichikov had been rubbing his eyes to + ascertain whether or not he was dreaming. What with the charge of being a + forger, the accusation of having schemed an abduction, the death of the + Public Prosecutor (whatever might have been its cause), and the advent of + a new Governor-General, he felt utterly dismayed. + </p> + <p> + “Things having come to their present pass,” he reflected, “I had better + not linger here—I had better be off at once.” + </p> + <p> + Getting rid of Nozdrev as soon as he could, he sent for Selifan, and + ordered him to be up at daybreak, in order to clean the britchka and to + have everything ready for a start at six o’clock. Yet, though Selifan + replied, “Very well, Paul Ivanovitch,” he hesitated awhile by the door. + Next, Chichikov bid Petrushka get out the dusty portmanteau from under the + bed, and then set to work to cram into it, pell-mell, socks, shirts, + collars (both clean and dirty), boot trees, a calendar, and a variety of + other articles. Everything went into the receptacle just as it came to + hand, since his one object was to obviate any possible delay in the + morning’s departure. Meanwhile the reluctant Selifan slowly, very slowly, + left the room, as slowly descended the staircase (on each separate step of + which he left a muddy foot-print), and, finally, halted to scratch his + head. What that scratching may have meant no one could say; for, with the + Russian populace, such a scratching may mean any one of a hundred things. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0011"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER XI + </h3> + <p> + Nevertheless events did not turn out as Chichikov had intended they + should. In the first place, he overslept himself. That was check number + one. In the second place, on his rising and inquiring whether the britchka + had been harnessed and everything got ready, he was informed that neither + of those two things had been done. That was check number two. Beside + himself with rage, he prepared to give Selifan the wigging of his life, + and, meanwhile, waited impatiently to hear what the delinquent had got to + say in his defence. It goes without saying that when Selifan made his + appearance in the doorway he had only the usual excuses to offer—the + sort of excuses usually offered by servants when a hasty departure has + become imperatively necessary. + </p> + <p> + “Paul Ivanovitch,” he said, “the horses require shoeing.” + </p> + <p> + “Blockhead!” exclaimed Chichikov. “Why did you not tell me of that before, + you damned fool? Was there not time enough for them to be shod?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I suppose there was,” agreed Selifan. “Also one of the wheels is in + want of a new tyre, for the roads are so rough that the old tyre is worn + through. Also, the body of the britchka is so rickety that probably it + will not last more than a couple of stages.” + </p> + <p> + “Rascal!” shouted Chichikov, clenching his fists and approaching Selifan + in such a manner that, fearing to receive a blow, the man backed and + dodged aside. “Do you mean to ruin me, and to break all our bones on the + road, you cursed idiot? For these three weeks past you have been doing + nothing at all; yet now, at the last moment, you come here stammering and + playing the fool! Do you think I keep you just to eat and to drive + yourself about? You must have known of this before? Did you, or did you + not, know it? Answer me at once.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I did know it,” replied Selifan, hanging his head. + </p> + <p> + “Then why didn’t you tell me about it?” + </p> + <p> + Selifan had no reply immediately ready, so continued to hang his head + while quietly saying to himself: “See how well I have managed things! I + knew what was the matter, yet I did not say.” + </p> + <p> + “And now,” continued Chichikov, “go you at once and fetch a blacksmith. + Tell him that everything must be put right within two hours at the most. + Do you hear? If that should not be done, I, I—I will give you the + best flogging that ever you had in your life.” Truly Chichikov was almost + beside himself with fury. + </p> + <p> + Turning towards the door, as though for the purpose of going and carrying + out his orders, Selifan halted and added: + </p> + <p> + “That skewbald, barin—you might think it well to sell him, seeing + that he is nothing but a rascal? A horse like that is more of a hindrance + than a help.” + </p> + <p> + “What? Do you expect me to go NOW to the market-place and sell him?” + </p> + <p> + “Well, Paul Ivanovitch, he is good for nothing but show, since by nature + he is a most cunning beast. Never in my life have I seen such a horse.” + </p> + <p> + “Fool! Whenever I may wish to sell him I SHALL sell him. Meanwhile, don’t + you trouble your head about what doesn’t concern you, but go and fetch a + blacksmith, and see that everything is put right within two hours. + Otherwise I will take the very hair off your head, and beat you till you + haven’t a face left. Be off! Hurry!” + </p> + <p> + Selifan departed, and Chichikov, his ill-humour vented, threw down upon + the floor the poignard which he always took with him as a means of + instilling respect into whomsoever it might concern, and spent the next + quarter of an hour in disputing with a couple of blacksmiths—men + who, as usual, were rascals of the type which, on perceiving that + something is wanted in a hurry, at once multiplies its terms for providing + the same. Indeed, for all Chichikov’s storming and raging as he dubbed the + fellows robbers and extortioners and thieves, he could make no impression + upon the pair, since, true to their character, they declined to abate + their prices, and, even when they had begun their work, spent upon it, not + two hours, but five and a half. Meanwhile he had the satisfaction of + experiencing that delightful time with which all travellers are familiar—namely, + the time during which one sits in a room where, except for a litter of + string, waste paper, and so forth, everything else has been packed. But to + all things there comes an end, and there arrived also the long-awaited + moment when the britchka had received the luggage, the faulty wheel had + been fitted with a new tyre, the horses had been re-shod, and the + predatory blacksmiths had departed with their gains. “Thank God!” thought + Chichikov as the britchka rolled out of the gates of the inn, and the + vehicle began to jolt over the cobblestones. Yet a feeling which he could + not altogether have defined filled his breast as he gazed upon the houses + and the streets and the garden walls which he might never see again. + Presently, on turning a corner, the britchka was brought to a halt through + the fact that along the street there was filing a seemingly endless + funeral procession. Leaning forward in his britchka, Chichikov asked + Petrushka whose obsequies the procession represented, and was told that + they represented those of the Public Prosecutor. Disagreeably shocked, our + hero hastened to raise the hood of the vehicle, to draw the curtains + across the windows, and to lean back into a corner. While the britchka + remained thus halted Selifan and Petrushka, their caps doffed, sat + watching the progress of the cortege, after they had received strict + instructions not to greet any fellow-servant whom they might recognise. + Behind the hearse walked the whole body of tchinovniks, bare-headed; and + though, for a moment or two, Chichikov feared that some of their number + might discern him in his britchka, he need not have disturbed himself, + since their attention was otherwise engaged. In fact, they were not even + exchanging the small talk customary among members of such processions, but + thinking exclusively of their own affairs, of the advent of the new + Governor-General, and of the probable manner in which he would take up the + reins of administration. Next came a number of carriages, from the windows + of which peered the ladies in mourning toilets. Yet the movements of their + hands and lips made it evident that they were indulging in animated + conversation—probably about the Governor-General, the balls which he + might be expected to give, and their own eternal fripperies and gewgaws. + Lastly came a few empty drozhkis. As soon as the latter had passed, our + hero was able to continue on his way. Throwing back the hood of the + britchka, he said to himself: + </p> + <p> + “Ah, good friend, you have lived your life, and now it is over! In the + newspapers they will say of you that you died regretted not only by your + subordinates, but also by humanity at large, as well as that, a respected + citizen, a kind father, and a husband beyond reproach, you went to your + grave amid the tears of your widow and orphans. Yet, should those journals + be put to it to name any particular circumstance which justified this + eulogy of you, they would be forced to fall back upon the fact that you + grew a pair of exceptionally thick eyebrows!” + </p> + <p> + With that Chichikov bid Selifan quicken his pace, and concluded: “After + all, it is as well that I encountered the procession, for they say that to + meet a funeral is lucky.” + </p> + <p> + Presently the britchka turned into some less frequented streets, lines of + wooden fencing of the kind which mark the outskirts of a town began to + file by, the cobblestones came to an end, the macadam of the highroad + succeeded to them, and once more there began on either side of the + turnpike a procession of verst stones, road menders, and grey villages; + inns with samovars and peasant women and landlords who came running out of + yards with seivefuls of oats; pedestrians in worn shoes which, it might + be, had covered eight hundred versts; little towns, bright with booths for + the sale of flour in barrels, boots, small loaves, and other trifles; + heaps of slag; much repaired bridges; expanses of field to right and to + left; stout landowners; a mounted soldier bearing a green, iron-clamped + box inscribed: “The —th Battery of Artillery”; long strips of + freshly-tilled earth which gleamed green, yellow, and black on the face of + the countryside. With it mingled long-drawn singing, glimpses of elm-tops + amid mist, the far-off notes of bells, endless clouds of rocks, and the + illimitable line of the horizon. + </p> + <p> + Ah, Russia, Russia, from my beautiful home in a strange land I can still + see you! In you everything is poor and disordered and unhomely; in you the + eye is neither cheered nor dismayed by temerities of nature which a yet + more temerarious art has conquered; in you one beholds no cities with + lofty, many-windowed mansions, lofty as crags, no picturesque trees, no + ivy-clad ruins, no waterfalls with their everlasting spray and roar, no + beetling precipices which confuse the brain with their stony immensity, no + vistas of vines and ivy and millions of wild roses and ageless lines of + blue hills which look almost unreal against the clear, silvery background + of the sky. In you everything is flat and open; your towns project like + points or signals from smooth levels of plain, and nothing whatsoever + enchants or deludes the eye. Yet what secret, what invincible force draws + me to you? Why does there ceaselessly echo and re-echo in my ears the sad + song which hovers throughout the length and the breadth of your borders? + What is the burden of that song? Why does it wail and sob and catch at my + heart? What say the notes which thus painfully caress and embrace my soul, + and flit, uttering their lamentations, around me? What is it you seek of + me, O Russia? What is the hidden bond which subsists between us? Why do + you regard me as you do? Why does everything within you turn upon me eyes + full of yearning? Even at this moment, as I stand dumbly, fixedly, + perplexedly contemplating your vastness, a menacing cloud, charged with + gathering rain, seems to overshadow my head. What is it that your + boundless expanses presage? Do they not presage that one day there will + arise in you ideas as boundless as yourself? Do they not presage that one + day you too will know no limits? Do they not presage that one day, when + again you shall have room for their exploits, there will spring to life + the heroes of old? How the power of your immensity enfolds me, and + reverberates through all my being with a wild, strange spell, and flashes + in my eyes with an almost supernatural radiance! Yes, a strange, + brilliant, unearthly vista indeed do you disclose, O Russia, country of + mine! + </p> + <p> + “Stop, stop, you fool!” shouted Chichikov to Selifan; and even as he spoke + a troika, bound on Government business, came chattering by, and + disappeared in a cloud of dust. To Chichikov’s curses at Selifan for not + having drawn out of the way with more alacrity a rural constable with + moustaches of the length of an arshin added his quota. + </p> + <p> + What a curious and attractive, yet also what an unreal, fascination the + term “highway” connotes! And how interesting for its own sake is a + highway! Should the day be a fine one (though chilly) in mellowing autumn, + press closer your travelling cloak, and draw down your cap over your ears, + and snuggle cosily, comfortably into a corner of the britchka before a + last shiver shall course through your limbs, and the ensuing warmth shall + put to flight the autumnal cold and damp. As the horses gallop on their + way, how delightfully will drowsiness come stealing upon you, and make + your eyelids droop! For a while, through your somnolence, you will + continue to hear the hard breathing of the team and the rumbling of the + wheels; but at length, sinking back into your corner, you will relapse + into the stage of snoring. And when you awake—behold! you will find + that five stages have slipped away, and that the moon is shining, and that + you have reached a strange town of churches and old wooden cupolas and + blackened spires and white, half-timbered houses! And as the moonlight + glints hither and thither, almost you will believe that the walls and the + streets and the pavements of the place are spread with sheets—sheets + shot with coal-black shadows which make the wooden roofs look all the + brighter under the slanting beams of the pale luminary. Nowhere is a soul + to be seen, for every one is plunged in slumber. Yet no. In a solitary + window a light is flickering where some good burgher is mending his boots, + or a baker drawing a batch of dough. O night and powers of heaven, how + perfect is the blackness of your infinite vault—how lofty, how + remote its inaccessible depths where it lies spread in an intangible, yet + audible, silence! Freshly does the lulling breath of night blow in your + face, until once more you relapse into snoring oblivion, and your poor + neighbour turns angrily in his corner as he begins to be conscious of your + weight. Then again you awake, but this time to find yourself confronted + with only fields and steppes. Everywhere in the ascendant is the + desolation of space. But suddenly the ciphers on a verst stone leap to the + eye! Morning is rising, and on the chill, gradually paling line of the + horizon you can see gleaming a faint gold streak. The wind freshens and + grows keener, and you snuggle closer in your cloak; yet how glorious is + that freshness, and how marvellous the sleep in which once again you + become enfolded! A jolt!—and for the last time you return to + consciousness. By now the sun is high in the heavens, and you hear a voice + cry “gently, gently!” as a farm waggon issues from a by-road. Below, + enclosed within an ample dike, stretches a sheet of water which glistens + like copper in the sunlight. Beyond, on the side of a slope, lie some + scattered peasants’ huts, a manor house, and, flanking the latter, a + village church with its cross flashing like a star. There also comes + wafted to your ear the sound of peasants’ laughter, while in your inner + man you are becoming conscious of an appetite which is not to be + withstood. + </p> + <p> + Oh long-drawn highway, how excellent you are! How often have I in + weariness and despondency set forth upon your length, and found in you + salvation and rest! How often, as I followed your leading, have I been + visited with wonderful thoughts and poetic dreams and curious, wild + impressions! + </p> + <p> + At this moment our friend Chichikov also was experiencing visions of a not + wholly prosaic nature. Let us peep into his soul and share them. At first + he remained unconscious of anything whatsoever, for he was too much + engaged in making sure that he was really clear of the town; but as soon + as he saw that it had completely disappeared, with its mills and factories + and other urban appurtenances, and that even the steeples of the white + stone churches had sunk below the horizon, he turned his attention to the + road, and the town of N. vanished from his thoughts as completely as + though he had not seen it since childhood. Again, in its turn, the road + ceased to interest him, and he began to close his eyes and to loll his + head against the cushions. Of this let the author take advantage, in order + to speak at length concerning his hero; since hitherto he (the author) has + been prevented from so doing by Nozdrev and balls and ladies and local + intrigues—by those thousand trifles which seem trifles only when + they are introduced into a book, but which, in life, figure as affairs of + importance. Let us lay them aside, and betake ourselves to business. + </p> + <p> + Whether the character whom I have selected for my hero has pleased my + readers is, of course, exceedingly doubtful. At all events the ladies will + have failed to approve him for the fair sex demands in a hero perfection, + and, should there be the least mental or physical stain on him—well, + woe betide! Yes, no matter how profoundly the author may probe that hero’s + soul, no matter how clearly he may portray his figure as in a mirror, he + will be given no credit for the achievement. Indeed, Chichikov’s very + stoutness and plenitude of years may have militated against him, for never + is a hero pardoned for the former, and the majority of ladies will, in + such case, turn away, and mutter to themselves: “Phew! What a beast!” Yes, + the author is well aware of this. Yet, though he could not, to save his + life, take a person of virtue for his principal character, it may be that + this story contains themes never before selected, and that in it there + projects the whole boundless wealth of Russian psychology; that it + portrays, as well as Chichikov, the peasant who is gifted with the virtues + which God has sent him, and the marvellous maiden of Russia who has not + her like in all the world for her beautiful feminine spirituality, the + roots of which lie buried in noble aspirations and boundless self-denial. + In fact, compared with these types, the virtuous of other races seem + lifeless, as does an inanimate volume when compared with the living word. + Yes, each time that there arises in Russia a movement of thought, it + becomes clear that the movement sinks deep into the Slavonic nature where + it would but have skimmed the surface of other nations.—But why am I + talking like this? Whither am I tending? It is indeed shameful that an + author who long ago reached man’s estate, and was brought up to a course + of severe introspection and sober, solitary self-enlightenment, should + give way to such jejune wandering from the point. To everything its proper + time and place and turn. As I was saying, it does not lie in me to take a + virtuous character for my hero: and I will tell you why. It is because it + is high time that a rest were given to the “poor, but virtuous” + individual; it is because the phrase “a man of worth” has grown into a + by-word; it is because the “man of worth” has become converted into a + horse, and there is not a writer but rides him and flogs him, in and out + of season; it is because the “man of worth” has been starved until he has + not a shred of his virtue left, and all that remains of his body is but + the ribs and the hide; it is because the “man of worth” is for ever being + smuggled upon the scene; it is because the “man of worth” has at length + forfeited every one’s respect. For these reasons do I reaffirm that it is + high time to yoke a rascal to the shafts. Let us yoke that rascal. + </p> + <p> + Our hero’s beginnings were both modest and obscure. True, his parents were + dvoriane, but he in no way resembled them. At all events, a short, squab + female relative who was present at his birth exclaimed as she lifted up + the baby: “He is altogether different from what I had expected him to be. + He ought to have taken after his maternal grandmother, whereas he has been + born, as the proverb has it, ‘like not father nor mother, but like a + chance passer-by.’” Thus from the first life regarded the little Chichikov + with sour distaste, and as through a dim, frost-encrusted window. A tiny + room with diminutive casements which were never opened, summer or winter; + an invalid father in a dressing-gown lined with lambskin, and with an + ailing foot swathed in bandages—a man who was continually drawing + deep breaths, and walking up and down the room, and spitting into a + sandbox; a period of perpetually sitting on a bench with pen in hand and + ink on lips and fingers; a period of being eternally confronted with the + copy-book maxim, “Never tell a lie, but obey your superiors, and cherish + virtue in your heart;” an everlasting scraping and shuffling of slippers + up and down the room; a period of continually hearing a well-known, + strident voice exclaim: “So you have been playing the fool again!” at + times when the child, weary of the mortal monotony of his task, had added + a superfluous embellishment to his copy; a period of experiencing the + ever-familiar, but ever-unpleasant, sensation which ensued upon those + words as the boy’s ear was painfully twisted between two long fingers bent + backwards at the tips—such is the miserable picture of that youth of + which, in later life, Chichikov preserved but the faintest of memories! + But in this world everything is liable to swift and sudden change; and, + one day in early spring, when the rivers had melted, the father set forth + with his little son in a teliezshka <a href="#linknote-37" + id="linknoteref-37"><small>37</small></a> drawn by a + sorrel steed of the kind known to horsy folk as a soroka, and having as + coachman the diminutive hunchback who, father of the only serf family + belonging to the elder Chichikov, served as general factotum in the + Chichikov establishment. For a day and a half the soroka conveyed them on + their way; during which time they spent the night at a roadside inn, + crossed a river, dined off cold pie and roast mutton, and eventually + arrived at the county town. To the lad the streets presented a spectacle + of unwonted brilliancy, and he gaped with amazement. Turning into a side + alley wherein the mire necessitated both the most strenuous exertions on + the soroka’s part and the most vigorous castigation on the part of the + driver and the barin, the conveyance eventually reached the gates of a + courtyard which, combined with a small fruit garden containing various + bushes, a couple of apple-trees in blossom, and a mean, dirty little shed, + constituted the premises attached to an antiquated-looking villa. Here + there lived a relative of the Chichikovs, a wizened old lady who went to + market in person and dried her stockings at the samovar. On seeing the + boy, she patted his cheek and expressed satisfaction at his physique; + whereupon the fact became disclosed that here he was to abide for a while, + for the purpose of attending a local school. After a night’s rest his + father prepared to betake himself homeward again; but no tears marked the + parting between him and his son, he merely gave the lad a copper or two + and (a far more important thing) the following injunctions. “See here, my + boy. Do your lessons well, do not idle or play the fool, and above all + things, see that you please your teachers. So long as you observe these + rules you will make progress, and surpass your fellows, even if God shall + have denied you brains, and you should fail in your studies. Also, do not + consort overmuch with your comrades, for they will do you no good; but, + should you do so, then make friends with the richer of them, since one day + they may be useful to you. Also, never entertain or treat any one, but see + that every one entertains and treats YOU. Lastly, and above all else, keep + and save your every kopeck. To save money is the most important thing in + life. Always a friend or a comrade may fail you, and be the first to + desert you in a time of adversity; but never will a KOPECK fail you, + whatever may be your plight. Nothing in the world cannot be done, cannot + be attained, with the aid of money.” These injunctions given, the father + embraced his son, and set forth on his return; and though the son never + again beheld his parent, the latter’s words and precepts sank deep into + the little Chichikov’s soul. + </p> + <p> + The next day young Pavlushka made his first attendance at school. But no + special aptitude in any branch of learning did he display. Rather, his + distinguishing characteristics were diligence and neatness. On the other + hand, he developed great intelligence as regards the PRACTICAL aspect of + life. In a trice he divined and comprehended how things ought to be + worked, and, from that time forth, bore himself towards his school-fellows + in such a way that, though they frequently gave him presents, he not only + never returned the compliment, but even on occasions pocketed the gifts + for the mere purpose of selling them again. Also, boy though he was, he + acquired the art of self-denial. Of the trifle which his father had given + him on parting he spent not a kopeck, but, the same year, actually added + to his little store by fashioning a bullfinch of wax, painting it, and + selling the same at a handsome profit. Next, as time went on, he engaged + in other speculations—in particular, in the scheme of buying up + eatables, taking his seat in class beside boys who had plenty of + pocket-money, and, as soon as such opulent individuals showed signs of + failing attention (and, therefore, of growing appetite), tendering them, + from beneath the desk, a roll of pudding or a piece of gingerbread, and + charging according to degree of appetite and size of portion. He also + spent a couple of months in training a mouse, which he kept confined in a + little wooden cage in his bedroom. At length, when the training had + reached the point that, at the several words of command, the mouse would + stand upon its hind legs, lie down, and get up again, he sold the creature + for a respectable sum. Thus, in time, his gains attained the amount of + five roubles; whereupon he made himself a purse and then started to fill a + second receptacle of the kind. Still more studied was his attitude towards + the authorities. No one could sit more quietly in his place on the bench + than he. In the same connection it may be remarked that his teacher was a + man who, above all things, loved peace and good behaviour, and simply + could not abide clever, witty boys, since he suspected them of laughing at + him. Consequently any lad who had once attracted the master’s attention + with a manifestation of intelligence needed but to shuffle in his place, + or unintentionally to twitch an eyebrow, for the said master at once to + burst into a rage, to turn the supposed offender out of the room, and to + visit him with unmerciful punishment. “Ah, my fine fellow,” he would say, + “I’LL cure you of your impudence and want of respect! I know you through + and through far better than you know yourself, and will take good care + that you have to go down upon your knees and curb your appetite.” + Whereupon the wretched lad would, for no cause of which he was aware, be + forced to wear out his breeches on the floor and go hungry for days. + “Talents and gifts,” the schoolmaster would declare, “are so much rubbish. + I respect only good behaviour, and shall award full marks to those who + conduct themselves properly, even if they fail to learn a single letter of + their alphabet: whereas to those in whom I may perceive a tendency to + jocularity I shall award nothing, even though they should outdo Solon + himself.” For the same reason he had no great love of the author Krylov, + in that the latter says in one of his Fables: “In my opinion, the more one + sings, the better one works;” and often the pedagogue would relate how, in + a former school of his, the silence had been such that a fly could be + heard buzzing on the wing, and for the space of a whole year not a single + pupil sneezed or coughed in class, and so complete was the absence of all + sound that no one could have told that there was a soul in the place. Of + this mentor young Chichikov speedily appraised the mentality; wherefore he + fashioned his behaviour to correspond with it. Not an eyelid, not an + eyebrow, would he stir during school hours, howsoever many pinches he + might receive from behind; and only when the bell rang would he run to + anticipate his fellows in handing the master the three-cornered cap which + that dignitary customarily sported, and then to be the first to leave the + class-room, and contrive to meet the master not less than two or three + times as the latter walked homeward, in order that, on each occasion, he + might doff his cap. And the scheme proved entirely successful. Throughout + the period of his attendance at school he was held in high favour, and, on + leaving the establishment, received full marks for every subject, as well + as a diploma and a book inscribed (in gilt letters) “For Exemplary + Diligence and the Perfection of Good Conduct.” By this time he had grown + into a fairly good-looking youth of the age when the chin first calls for + a razor; and at about the same period his father died, leaving behind him, + as his estate, four waistcoats completely worn out, two ancient + frockcoats, and a small sum of money. Apparently he had been skilled only + in RECOMMENDING the saving of kopecks—not in ACTUALLY PRACTISING the + art. Upon that Chichikov sold the old house and its little parcel of land + for a thousand roubles, and removed, with his one serf and the serf’s + family, to the capital, where he set about organising a new establishment + and entering the Civil Service. Simultaneously with his doing so, his old + schoolmaster lost (through stupidity or otherwise) the establishment over + which he had hitherto presided, and in which he had set so much store by + silence and good behaviour. Grief drove him to drink, and when nothing was + left, even for that purpose, he retired—ill, helpless, and starving—into + a broken-down, cheerless hovel. But certain of his former pupils—the + same clever, witty lads whom he had once been wont to accuse of + impertinence and evil conduct generally—heard of his pitiable + plight, and collected for him what money they could, even to the point of + selling their own necessaries. Only Chichikov, when appealed to, pleaded + inability, and compromised with a contribution of a single piatak <a + href="#linknote-38" id="linknoteref-38"><small>38</small></a>: + which his old schoolfellows straightway returned him—full in the + face, and accompanied with a shout of “Oh, you skinflint!” As for the poor + schoolmaster, when he heard what his former pupils had done, he buried his + face in his hands, and the tears gushed from his failing eyes as from + those of a helpless infant. “God has brought you but to weep over my + death-bed,” he murmured feebly; and added with a profound sigh, on hearing + of Chichikov’s conduct: “Ah, Pavlushka, how a human being may become + changed! Once you were a good lad, and gave me no trouble; but now you are + become proud indeed!” + </p> + <p> + Yet let it not be inferred from this that our hero’s character had grown + so blase and hard, or his conscience so blunted, as to preclude his + experiencing a particle of sympathy or compassion. As a matter of fact, he + was capable both of the one and the other, and would have been glad to + assist his old teacher had no great sum been required, or had he not been + called upon to touch the fund which he had decided should remain intact. + In other words, the father’s injunction, “Guard and save every kopeck,” + had become a hard and fast rule of the son’s. Yet the youth had no + particular attachment to money for money’s sake; he was not possessed with + the true instinct for hoarding and niggardliness. Rather, before his eyes + there floated ever a vision of life and its amenities and advantages—a + vision of carriages and an elegantly furnished house and recherche + dinners; and it was in the hope that some day he might attain these things + that he saved every kopeck and, meanwhile, stinted both himself and + others. Whenever a rich man passed him by in a splendid drozhki drawn by + swift and handsomely-caparisoned horses, he would halt as though deep in + thought, and say to himself, like a man awakening from a long sleep: “That + gentleman must have been a financier, he has so little hair on his brow.” + In short, everything connected with wealth and plenty produced upon him an + ineffaceable impression. Even when he left school he took no holiday, so + strong in him was the desire to get to work and enter the Civil Service. + Yet, for all the encomiums contained in his diploma, he had much ado to + procure a nomination to a Government Department; and only after a long + time was a minor post found for him, at a salary of thirty or forty + roubles a year. Nevertheless, wretched though this appointment was, he + determined, by strict attention to business, to overcome all obstacles, + and to win success. And, indeed, the self-denial, the patience, and the + economy which he displayed were remarkable. From early morn until late at + night he would, with indefatigable zeal of body and mind, remain immersed + in his sordid task of copying official documents—never going home, + snatching what sleep he could on tables in the building, and dining with + the watchman on duty. Yet all the while he contrived to remain clean and + neat, to preserve a cheerful expression of countenance, and even to + cultivate a certain elegance of movement. In passing, it may be remarked + that his fellow tchinovniks were a peculiarly plain, unsightly lot, some + of them having faces like badly baked bread, swollen cheeks, receding + chins, and cracked and blistered upper lips. Indeed, not a man of them was + handsome. Also, their tone of voice always contained a note of sullenness, + as though they had a mind to knock some one on the head; and by their + frequent sacrifices to Bacchus they showed that even yet there remains in + the Slavonic nature a certain element of paganism. Nay, the Director’s + room itself they would invade while still licking their lips, and since + their breath was not over-aromatic, the atmosphere of the room grew not + over-pleasant. Naturally, among such an official staff a man like + Chichikov could not fail to attract attention and remark, since in + everything—in cheerfulness of demeanour, in suavity of voice, and in + complete neglect of the use of strong potions—he was the absolute + antithesis of his companions. Yet his path was not an easy one to tread, + for over him he had the misfortune to have placed in authority a Chief + Clerk who was a graven image of elderly insensibility and inertia. Always + the same, always unapproachable, this functionary could never in his life + have smiled or asked civilly after an acquaintance’s health. Nor had any + one ever seen him a whit different in the street or at his own home from + what he was in the office, or showing the least interest in anything + whatever, or getting drunk and relapsing into jollity in his cups, or + indulging in that species of wild gaiety which, when intoxicated, even a + burglar affects. No, not a particle of this was there in him. Nor, for + that matter, was there in him a particle of anything at all, whether good + or bad: which complete negativeness of character produced rather a strange + effect. In the same way, his wizened, marble-like features reminded one of + nothing in particular, so primly proportioned were they. Only the numerous + pockmarks and dimples with which they were pitted placed him among the + number of those over whose faces, to quote the popular saying, “The Devil + has walked by night to grind peas.” In short, it would seem that no human + agency could have approached such a man and gained his goodwill. Yet + Chichikov made the effort. As a first step, he took to consulting the + other’s convenience in all manner of insignificant trifles—to + cleaning his pens carefully, and, when they had been prepared exactly to + the Chief Clerk’s liking, laying them ready at his elbow; to dusting and + sweeping from his table all superfluous sand and tobacco ash; to procuring + a new mat for his inkstand; to looking for his hat—the + meanest-looking hat that ever the world beheld—and having it ready + for him at the exact moment when business came to an end; to brushing his + back if it happened to become smeared with whitewash from a wall. Yet all + this passed as unnoticed as though it had never been done. Finally, + Chichikov sniffed into his superior’s family and domestic life, and learnt + that he possessed a grown-up daughter on whose face also there had taken + place a nocturnal, diabolical grinding of peas. HERE was a quarter whence + a fresh attack might be delivered! After ascertaining what church the + daughter attended on Sundays, our hero took to contriving to meet her in a + neat suit and a well-starched dickey: and soon the scheme began to work. + The surly Chief Clerk wavered for a while; then ended by inviting + Chichikov to tea. Nor could any man in the office have told you how it + came about that before long Chichikov had removed to the Chief Clerk’s + house, and become a person necessary—indeed indispensable—to + the household, seeing that he bought the flour and the sugar, treated the + daughter as his betrothed, called the Chief Clerk “Papenka,” and + occasionally kissed “Papenka’s” hand. In fact, every one at the office + supposed that, at the end of February (i.e. before the beginning of Lent) + there would take place a wedding. Nay, the surly father even began to + agitate with the authorities on Chichikov’s behalf, and so enabled our + hero, on a vacancy occurring, to attain the stool of a Chief Clerk. + Apparently this marked the consummation of Chichikov’s relations with his + host, for he hastened stealthily to pack his trunk and, the next day, + figured in a fresh lodging. Also, he ceased to call the Chief Clerk + “Papenka,” or to kiss his hand; and the matter of the wedding came to as + abrupt a termination as though it had never been mooted. Yet also he never + failed to press his late host’s hand, whenever he met him, and to invite + him to tea; while, on the other hand, for all his immobility and dry + indifference, the Chief Clerk never failed to shake his head with a + muttered, “Ah, my fine fellow, you have grown too proud, you have grown + too proud.” + </p> + <p> + The foregoing constituted the most difficult step that our hero had to + negotiate. Thereafter things came with greater ease and swifter success. + Everywhere he attracted notice, for he developed within himself everything + necessary for this world—namely, charm of manner and bearing, and + great diligence in business matters. Armed with these resources, he next + obtained promotion to what is known as “a fat post,” and used it to the + best advantage; and even though, at that period, strict inquiry had begun + to be made into the whole subject of bribes, such inquiry failed to alarm + him—nay, he actually turned it to account and thereby manifested the + Russian resourcefulness which never fails to attain its zenith where + extortion is concerned. His method of working was the following. As soon + as a petitioner or a suitor put his hand into his pocket, to extract + thence the necessary letters of recommendation for signature, Chichikov + would smilingly exclaim as he detained his interlocutor’s hand: “No, no! + Surely you do not think that I—? But no, no! It is our duty, it is + our obligation, and we do not require rewards for doing our work properly. + So far as YOUR matter is concerned, you may rest easy. Everything shall be + carried through to-morrow. But may I have your address? There is no need + to trouble yourself, seeing that the documents can easily be brought to + you at your residence.” Upon which the delighted suitor would return home + in raptures, thinking: “Here, at long last, is the sort of man so badly + needed. A man of that kind is a jewel beyond price.” Yet for a day, for + two days—nay, even for three—the suitor would wait in vain so + far as any messengers with documents were concerned. Then he would repair + to the office—to find that his business had not so much as been + entered upon! Lastly, he would confront the “jewel beyond price.” “Oh, + pardon me, pardon me!” Chichikov would exclaim in the politest of tones as + he seized and grasped the visitor’s hands. “The truth is that we have SUCH + a quantity of business on hand! But the matter shall be put through + to-morrow, and in the meanwhile I am most sorry about it.” And with this + would go the most fascinating of gestures. Yet neither on the morrow, nor + on the day following, nor on the third would documents arrive at the + suitor’s abode. Upon that he would take thought as to whether something + more ought not to have been done; and, sure enough, on his making inquiry, + he would be informed that “something will have to be given to the + copyists.” “Well, there can be no harm in that,” he would reply. “As a + matter of fact, I have ready a tchetvertak <a href="#linknote-39" + id="linknoteref-39"><small>39</small></a> or two.” + “Oh, no, no,” the answer would come. “Not a tchetvertak per copyist, but a + rouble, is the fee.” “What? A rouble per copyist?” “Certainly. What is + there to grumble at in that? Of the money the copyists will receive a + tchetvertak apiece, and the rest will go to the Government.” Upon that the + disillusioned suitor would fly out upon the new order of things brought + about by the inquiry into illicit fees, and curse both the tchinovniks and + their uppish, insolent behaviour. “Once upon a time,” would the suitor + lament, “one DID know what to do. Once one had tipped the Director a + bank-note, one’s affair was, so to speak, in the hat. But now one has to + pay a rouble per copyist after waiting a week because otherwise it was + impossible to guess how the wind might set! The devil fly away with all + ‘disinterested’ and ‘trustworthy’ tchinovniks!” And certainly the + aggrieved suitor had reason to grumble, seeing that, now that bribe-takers + had ceased to exist, and Directors had uniformly become men of honour and + integrity, secretaries and clerks ought not with impunity to have + continued their thievish ways. In time there opened out to Chichikov a + still wider field, for a Commission was appointed to supervise the + erection of a Government building, and, on his being nominated to that + body, he proved himself one of its most active members. The Commission got + to work without delay, but for a space of six years had some trouble with + the building in question. Either the climate hindered operations or the + materials used were of the kind which prevents official edifices from ever + rising higher than the basement. But, meanwhile, OTHER quarters of the + town saw arise, for each member of the Commission, a handsome house of the + NON-official style of architecture. Clearly the foundation afforded by the + soil of those parts was better than that where the Government building was + still engaged in hanging fire! Likewise the members of the Commission + began to look exceedingly prosperous, and to blossom out into family life; + and, for the first time in his existence, even Chichikov also departed + from the iron laws of his self-imposed restraint and inexorable + self-denial, and so far mitigated his heretofore asceticism as to show + himself a man not averse to those amenities which, during his youth, he + had been capable of renouncing. That is to say, certain superfluities + began to make their appearance in his establishment. He engaged a good + cook, took to wearing linen shirts, bought for himself cloth of a pattern + worn by no one else in the province, figured in checks shot with the + brightest of reds and browns, fitted himself out with two splendid horses + (which he drove with a single pair of reins, added to a ring attachment + for the trace horse), developed a habit of washing with a sponge dipped in + eau-de-Cologne, and invested in soaps of the most expensive quality, in + order to communicate to his skin a more elegant polish. + </p> + <p> + But suddenly there appeared upon the scene a new Director—a military + man, and a martinet as regarded his hostility to bribe-takers and anything + which might be called irregular. On the very day after his arrival he + struck fear into every breast by calling for accounts, discovering hosts + of deficits and missing sums, and directing his attention to the aforesaid + fine houses of civilian architecture. Upon that there ensued a complete + reshuffling. Tchinovniks were retired wholesale, and the houses were + sequestrated to the Government, or else converted into various pious + institutions and schools for soldiers’ children. Thus the whole fabric, + and especially Chichikov, came crashing to the ground. Particularly did + our hero’s agreeable face displease the new Director. Why that was so it + is impossible to say, but frequently, in cases of the kind, no reason + exists. However, the Director conceived a mortal dislike to him, and also + extended that enmity to the whole of Chichikov’s colleagues. But inasmuch + as the said Director was a military man, he was not fully acquainted with + the myriad subtleties of the civilian mind; wherefore it was not long + before, by dint of maintaining a discreet exterior, added to a faculty for + humouring all and sundry, a fresh gang of tchinovniks succeeded in + restoring him to mildness, and the General found himself in the hands of + greater thieves than before, but thieves whom he did not even suspect, + seeing that he believed himself to have selected men fit and proper, and + even ventured to boast of possessing a keen eye for talent. In a trice the + tchinovniks concerned appraised his spirit and character; with the result + that the entire sphere over which he ruled became an agency for the + detection of irregularities. Everywhere, and in every case, were those + irregularities pursued as a fisherman pursues a fat sturgeon with a gaff; + and to such an extent did the sport prove successful that almost in no + time each participator in the hunt was seen to be in possession of several + thousand roubles of capital. Upon that a large number of the former band + of tchinovniks also became converted to paths of rectitude, and were + allowed to re-enter the Service; but not by hook or by crook could + Chichikov worm his way back, even though, incited thereto by sundry items + of paper currency, the General’s first secretary and principal bear leader + did all he could on our hero’s behalf. It seemed that the General was the + kind of man who, though easily led by the nose (provided it was done + without his knowledge) no sooner got an idea into his head than it stuck + there like a nail, and could not possibly be extracted; and all that the + wily secretary succeeded in procuring was the tearing up of a certain + dirty fragment of paper—even that being effected only by an appeal + to the General’s compassion, on the score of the unhappy fate which, + otherwise, would befall Chichikov’s wife and children (who, luckily, had + no existence in fact). + </p> + <p> + “Well,” said Chichikov to himself, “I have done my best, and now + everything has failed. Lamenting my misfortune won’t help me, but only + action.” And with that he decided to begin his career anew, and once more + to arm himself with the weapons of patience and self-denial. The better to + effect this, he had, of course to remove to another town. Yet somehow, for + a while, things miscarried. More than once he found himself forced to + exchange one post for another, and at the briefest of notice; and all of + them were posts of the meanest, the most wretched, order. Yet, being a man + of the utmost nicety of feeling, the fact that he found himself rubbing + shoulders with anything but nice companions did not prevent him from + preserving intact his innate love of what was decent and seemly, or from + cherishing the instinct which led him to hanker after office fittings of + lacquered wood, with neatness and orderliness everywhere. Nor did he at + any time permit a foul word to creep into his speech, and would feel hurt + even if in the speech of others there occurred a scornful reference to + anything which pertained to rank and dignity. Also, the reader will be + pleased to know that our hero changed his linen every other day, and in + summer, when the weather was very hot, EVERY day, seeing that the very + faintest suspicion of an unpleasant odour offended his fastidiousness. For + the same reason it was his custom, before being valeted by Petrushka, + always to plug his nostrils with a couple of cloves. In short, there were + many occasions when his nerves suffered rackings as cruel as a young + girl’s, and so helped to increase his disgust at having once more to + associate with men who set no store by the decencies of life. Yet, though + he braced himself to the task, this period of adversity told upon his + health, and he even grew a trifle shabby. More than once, on happening to + catch sight of himself in the mirror, he could not forbear exclaiming: + “Holy Mother of God, but what a nasty-looking brute I have become!” and + for a long while afterwards could not with anything like sang-froid + contemplate his reflection. Yet throughout he bore up stoutly and + patiently—and ended by being transferred to the Customs Department. + It may be said that the department had long constituted the secret goal of + his ambition, for he had noted the foreign elegancies with which its + officials always contrived to provide themselves, and had also observed + that invariably they were able to send presents of china and cambric to + their sisters and aunts—well, to their lady friends generally. Yes, + more than once he had said to himself with a sigh: “THAT is the department + to which I ought to belong, for, given a town near the frontier, and a + sensible set of colleagues, I might be able to fit myself out with + excellent linen shirts.” Also, it may be said that most frequently of all + had his thoughts turned towards a certain quality of French soap which + imparted a peculiar whiteness to the skin and a peerless freshness to the + cheeks. Its name is known to God alone, but at least it was to be procured + only in the immediate neighbourhood of the frontier. So, as I say, + Chichikov had long felt a leaning towards the Customs, but for a time had + been restrained from applying for the same by the various current + advantages of the Building Commission; since rightly he had adjudged the + latter to constitute a bird in the hand, and the former to constitute only + a bird in the bush. But now he decided that, come what might, into the + Customs he must make his way. And that way he made, and then applied + himself to his new duties with a zeal born of the fact that he realised + that fortune had specially marked him out for a Customs officer. Indeed, + such activity, perspicuity, and ubiquity as his had never been seen or + thought of. Within four weeks at the most he had so thoroughly got his + hand in that he was conversant with Customs procedure in every detail. Not + only could he weigh and measure, but also he could divine from an invoice + how many arshins of cloth or other material a given piece contained, and + then, taking a roll of the latter in his hand, could specify at once the + number of pounds at which it would tip the scale. As for searchings, well, + even his colleagues had to admit that he possessed the nose of a veritable + bloodhound, and that it was impossible not to marvel at the patience + wherewith he would try every button of the suspected person, yet preserve, + throughout, a deadly politeness and an icy sang-froid which surpass + belief. And while the searched were raging, and foaming at the mouth, and + feeling that they would give worlds to alter his smiling exterior with a + good, resounding slap, he would move not a muscle of his face, nor abate + by a jot the urbanity of his demeanour, as he murmured, “Do you mind so + far incommoding yourself as to stand up?” or “Pray step into the next + room, madam, where the wife of one of our staff will attend you,” or “Pray + allow me to slip this penknife of mine into the lining of your coat” + (after which he would extract thence shawls and towels with as much + nonchalance as he would have done from his own travelling-trunk). Even his + superiors acknowledged him to be a devil at the job, rather than a human + being, so perfect was his instinct for looking into cart-wheels, + carriage-poles, horses’ ears, and places whither an author ought not to + penetrate even in thought—places whither only a Customs official is + permitted to go. The result was that the wretched traveller who had just + crossed the frontier would, within a few minutes, become wholly at sea, + and, wiping away the perspiration, and breaking out into body flushes, + would be reduced to crossing himself and muttering, “Well, well, well!” In + fact, such a traveller would feel in the position of a schoolboy who, + having been summoned to the presence of the headmaster for the ostensible + purpose of being given an order, has found that he receives, instead, a + sound flogging. In short, for some time Chichikov made it impossible for + smugglers to earn a living. In particular, he reduced Polish Jewry almost + to despair, so invincible, so almost unnatural, was the rectitude, the + incorruptibility which led him to refrain from converting himself into a + small capitalist with the aid of confiscated goods and articles which, “to + save excessive clerical labour,” had failed to be handed over to the + Government. Also, without saying it goes that such phenomenally zealous + and disinterested service attracted general astonishment, and, eventually, + the notice of the authorities; whereupon he received promotion, and + followed that up by mooting a scheme for the infallible detection of + contrabandists, provided that he could be furnished with the necessary + authority for carrying out the same. At once such authority was accorded + him, as also unlimited power to conduct every species of search and + investigation. And that was all he wanted. It happened that previously + there had been formed a well-found association for smuggling on regular, + carefully prepared lines, and that this daring scheme seemed to promise + profit to the extent of some millions of money: yet, though he had long + had knowledge of it, Chichikov had said to the association’s emissaries, + when sent to buy him over, “The time is not yet.” But now that he had got + all the reins into his hands, he sent word of the fact to the gang, and + with it the remark, “The time is NOW.” Nor was he wrong in his + calculations, for, within the space of a year, he had acquired what he + could not have made during twenty years of non-fraudulent service. With + similar sagacity he had, during his early days in the department, declined + altogether to enter into relations with the association, for the reason + that he had then been a mere cipher, and would have come in for nothing + large in the way of takings; but now—well, now it was another matter + altogether, and he could dictate what terms he liked. Moreover, that the + affair might progress the more smoothly, he suborned a fellow tchinovnik + of the type which, in spite of grey hairs, stands powerless against + temptation; and, the contract concluded, the association duly proceeded to + business. Certainly business began brilliantly. But probably most of my + readers are familiar with the oft-repeated story of the passage of Spanish + sheep across the frontier in double fleeces which carried between their + outer layers and their inner enough lace of Brabant to sell to the tune of + millions of roubles; wherefore I will not recount the story again beyond + saying that those journeys took place just when Chichikov had become head + of the Customs, and that, had he not a hand in the enterprise, not all the + Jews in the world could have brought it to success. By the time that three + or four of these ovine invasions had taken place, Chichikov and his + accomplice had come to be the possessors of four hundred thousand roubles + apiece; while some even aver that the former’s gains totalled half a + million, owing to the greater industry which he had displayed in the + matter. Nor can any one but God say to what a figure the fortunes of the + pair might not eventually have attained, had not an awkward contretemps + cut right across their arrangements. That is to say, for some reason or + another the devil so far deprived these tchinovnik-conspirators of sense + as to make them come to words with one another, and then to engage in a + quarrel. Beginning with a heated argument, this quarrel reached the point + of Chichikov—who was, possibly, a trifle tipsy—calling his + colleague a priest’s son; and though that description of the person so + addressed was perfectly accurate, he chose to take offence, and to answer + Chichikov with the words (loudly and incisively uttered), “It is YOU who + have a priest for your father,” and to add to that (the more to incense + his companion), “Yes, mark you! THAT is how it is.” Yet, though he had + thus turned the tables upon Chichikov with a tu quoque, and then capped + that exploit with the words last quoted, the offended tchinovnik could not + remain satisfied, but went on to send in an anonymous document to the + authorities. On the other hand, some aver that it was over a woman that + the pair fell out—over a woman who, to quote the phrase then current + among the staff of the Customs Department, was “as fresh and as strong as + the pulp of a turnip,” and that night-birds were hired to assault our hero + in a dark alley, and that the scheme miscarried, and that in any case both + Chichikov and his friend had been deceived, seeing that the person to whom + the lady had really accorded her favours was a certain staff-captain named + Shamsharev. However, only God knows the truth of the matter. Let the + inquisitive reader ferret it out for himself. The fact remains that a + complete exposure of the dealings with the contrabandists followed, and + that the two tchinovniks were put to the question, deprived of their + property, and made to formulate in writing all that they had done. Against + this thunderbolt of fortune the State Councillor could make no headway, + and in some retired spot or another sank into oblivion; but Chichikov put + a brave face upon the matter, for, in spite of the authorities’ best + efforts to smell out his gains, he had contrived to conceal a portion of + them, and also resorted to every subtle trick of intellect which could + possibly be employed by an experienced man of the world who has a wide + knowledge of his fellows. Nothing which could be effected by pleasantness + of demeanour, by moving oratory, by clouds of flattery, and by the + occasional insertion of a coin into a palm did he leave undone; with the + result that he was retired with less ignominy than was his companion, and + escaped actual trial on a criminal charge. Yet he issued stripped of all + his capital, stripped of his imported effects, stripped of everything. + That is to say, all that remained to him consisted of ten thousand roubles + which he had stored against a rainy day, two dozen linen shirts, a small + britchka of the type used by bachelors, and two serving-men named Selifan + and Petrushka. Yes, and an impulse of kindness moved the tchinovniks of + the Customs also to set aside for him a few cakes of the soap which he had + found so excellent for the freshness of the cheeks. Thus once more our + hero found himself stranded. And what an accumulation of misfortunes had + descended upon his head!—though, true, he termed them “suffering in + the Service in the cause of Truth.” Certainly one would have thought that, + after these buffetings and trials and changes of fortune—after this + taste of the sorrows of life—he and his precious ten thousand + roubles would have withdrawn to some peaceful corner in a provincial town, + where, clad in a stuff dressing-gown, he could have sat and listened to + the peasants quarrelling on festival days, or (for the sake of a breath of + fresh air) have gone in person to the poulterer’s to finger chickens for + soup, and so have spent a quiet, but not wholly useless, existence; but + nothing of the kind took place, and therein we must do justice to the + strength of his character. In other words, although he had undergone what, + to the majority of men, would have meant ruin and discouragement and a + shattering of ideals, he still preserved his energy. True, downcast and + angry, and full of resentment against the world in general, he felt + furious with the injustice of fate, and dissatisfied with the dealings of + men; yet he could not forbear courting additional experiences. In short, + the patience which he displayed was such as to make the wooden persistency + of the German—a persistency merely due to the slow, lethargic + circulation of the Teuton’s blood—seem nothing at all, seeing that + by nature Chichikov’s blood flowed strongly, and that he had to employ + much force of will to curb within himself those elements which longed to + burst forth and revel in freedom. He thought things over, and, as he did + so, a certain spice of reason appeared in his reflections. + </p> + <p> + “How have I come to be what I am?” he said to himself. “Why has misfortune + overtaken me in this way? Never have I wronged a poor person, or robbed a + widow, or turned any one out of doors: I have always been careful only to + take advantage of those who possess more than their share. Moreover, I + have never gleaned anywhere but where every one else was gleaning; and, + had I not done so, others would have gleaned in my place. Why, then, + should those others be prospering, and I be sunk as low as a worm? What am + I? What am I good for? How can I, in future, hope to look any honest + father of a family in the face? How shall I escape being tortured with the + thought that I am cumbering the ground? What, in the years to come, will + my children say, save that ‘our father was a brute, for he left us nothing + to live upon?’” + </p> + <p> + Here I may remark that we have seen how much thought Chichikov devoted to + his future descendants. Indeed, had not there been constantly recurring to + his mind the insistent question, “What will my children say?” he might not + have plunged into the affair so deeply. Nevertheless, like a wary cat + which glances hither and thither to see whether its mistress be not coming + before it can make off with whatsoever first falls to its paw (butter, + fat, lard, a duck, or anything else), so our future founder of a family + continued, though weeping and bewailing his lot, to let not a single + detail escape his eye. That is to say, he retained his wits ever in a + state of activity, and kept his brain constantly working. All that he + required was a plan. Once more he pulled himself together, once more he + embarked upon a life of toil, once more he stinted himself in everything, + once more he left clean and decent surroundings for a dirty, mean + existence. In other words, until something better should turn up, he + embraced the calling of an ordinary attorney—a calling which, not + then possessed of a civic status, was jostled on very side, enjoyed little + respect at the hands of the minor legal fry (or, indeed, at its own), and + perforce met with universal slights and rudeness. But sheer necessity + compelled Chichikov to face these things. Among commissions entrusted to + him was that of placing in the hands of the Public Trustee several hundred + peasants who belonged to a ruined estate. The estate had reached its + parlous condition through cattle disease, through rascally bailiffs, + through failures of the harvest, through such epidemic diseases that had + killed off the best workmen, and, last, but not least, through the + senseless conduct of the owner himself, who had furnished a house in + Moscow in the latest style, and then squandered his every kopeck, so that + nothing was left for his further maintenance, and it became necessary to + mortgage the remains—including the peasants—of the estate. In + those days mortgage to the Treasury was an innovation looked upon with + reserve, and, as attorney in the matter, Chichikov had first of all to + “entertain” every official concerned (we know that, unless that be + previously done, unless a whole bottle of madeira first be emptied down + each clerical throat, not the smallest legal affair can be carried + through), and to explain, for the barring of future attachments, that half + of the peasants were dead. + </p> + <p> + “And are they entered on the revision lists?” asked the secretary. “Yes,” + replied Chichikov. “Then what are you boggling at?” continued the + Secretary. “Should one soul die, another will be born, and in time grow up + to take the first one’s place.” Upon that there dawned on our hero one of + the most inspired ideas which ever entered the human brain. “What a + simpleton I am!” he thought to himself. “Here am I looking about for my + mittens when all the time I have got them tucked into my belt. Why, were I + myself to buy up a few souls which are dead—to buy them before a new + revision list shall have been made, the Council of Public Trust might pay + me two hundred roubles apiece for them, and I might find myself with, say, + a capital of two hundred thousand roubles! The present moment is + particularly propitious, since in various parts of the country there has + been an epidemic, and, glory be to God, a large number of souls have died + of it. Nowadays landowners have taken to card-playing and junketting and + wasting their money, or to joining the Civil Service in St. Petersburg; + consequently their estates are going to rack and ruin, and being managed + in any sort of fashion, and succeeding in paying their dues with greater + difficulty each year. That being so, not a man of the lot but would gladly + surrender to me his dead souls rather than continue paying the poll-tax; + and in this fashion I might make—well, not a few kopecks. Of course + there are difficulties, and, to avoid creating a scandal, I should need to + employ plenty of finesse; but man was given his brain to USE, not to + neglect. One good point about the scheme is that it will seem so + improbable that in case of an accident, no one in the world will believe + in it. True, it is illegal to buy or mortgage peasants without land, but I + can easily pretend to be buying them only for transferment elsewhere. Land + is to be acquired in the provinces of Taurida and Kherson almost for + nothing, provided that one undertakes subsequently to colonise it; so to + Kherson I will ‘transfer’ them, and long may they live there! And the + removal of my dead souls shall be carried out in the strictest legal form; + and if the authorities should want confirmation by testimony, I shall + produce a letter signed by my own superintendent of the Khersonian rural + police—that is to say, by myself. Lastly, the supposed village in + Kherson shall be called Chichikovoe—better still Pavlovskoe, + according to my Christian name.” + </p> + <p> + In this fashion there germinated in our hero’s brain that strange scheme + for which the reader may or may not be grateful, but for which the author + certainly is so, seeing that, had it never occurred to Chichikov, this + story would never have seen the light. + </p> + <p> + After crossing himself, according to the Russian custom, Chichikov set + about carrying out his enterprise. On pretence of selecting a place + wherein to settle, he started forth to inspect various corners of the + Russian Empire, but more especially those which had suffered from such + unfortunate accidents as failures of the harvest, a high rate of + mortality, or whatsoever else might enable him to purchase souls at the + lowest possible rate. But he did not tackle his landowners haphazard: he + rather selected such of them as seemed more particularly suited to his + taste, or with whom he might with the least possible trouble conclude + identical agreements; though, in the first instance, he always tried, by + getting on terms of acquaintanceship—better still, of friendship—with + them, to acquire the souls for nothing, and so to avoid purchase at all. + In passing, my readers must not blame me if the characters whom they have + encountered in these pages have not been altogether to their liking. The + fault is Chichikov’s rather than mine, for he is the master, and where he + leads we must follow. Also, should my readers gird at me for a certain + dimness and want of clarity in my principal characters and actors, that + will be tantamount to saying that never do the broad tendency and the + general scope of a work become immediately apparent. Similarly does the + entry to every town—the entry even to the Capital itself—convey + to the traveller such an impression of vagueness that at first everything + looks grey and monotonous, and the lines of smoky factories and workshops + seem never to be coming to an end; but in time there will begin also to + stand out the outlines of six-storied mansions, and of shops and + balconies, and wide perspectives of streets, and a medley of steeples, + columns, statues, and turrets—the whole framed in rattle and roar + and the infinite wonders which the hand and the brain of men have + conceived. Of the manner in which Chichikov’s first purchases were made + the reader is aware. Subsequently he will see also how the affair + progressed, and with what success or failure our hero met, and how + Chichikov was called upon to decide and to overcome even more difficult + problems than the foregoing, and by what colossal forces the levers of his + far-flung tale are moved, and how eventually the horizon will become + extended until everything assumes a grandiose and a lyrical tendency. Yes, + many a verst of road remains to be travelled by a party made up of an + elderly gentleman, a britchka of the kind affected by bachelors, a valet + named Petrushka, a coachman named Selifan, and three horses which, from + the Assessor to the skewbald, are known to us individually by name. Again, + although I have given a full description of our hero’s exterior (such as + it is), I may yet be asked for an inclusive definition also of his moral + personality. That he is no hero compounded of virtues and perfections must + be already clear. Then WHAT is he? A villain? Why should we call him a + villain? Why should we be so hard upon a fellow man? In these days our + villains have ceased to exist. Rather it would be fairer to call him an + ACQUIRER. The love of acquisition, the love of gain, is a fault common to + many, and gives rise to many and many a transaction of the kind generally + known as “not strictly honourable.” True, such a character contains an + element of ugliness, and the same reader who, on his journey through life, + would sit at the board of a character of this kind, and spend a most + agreeable time with him, would be the first to look at him askance if he + should appear in the guise of the hero of a novel or a play. But wise is + the reader who, on meeting such a character, scans him carefully, and, + instead of shrinking from him with distaste, probes him to the springs of + his being. The human personality contains nothing which may not, in the + twinkling of an eye, become altogether changed—nothing in which, + before you can look round, there may not spring to birth some cankerous + worm which is destined to suck thence the essential juice. Yes, it is a + common thing to see not only an overmastering passion, but also a passion + of the most petty order, arise in a man who was born to better things, and + lead him both to forget his greatest and most sacred obligations, and to + see only in the veriest trifles the Great and the Holy. For human passions + are as numberless as is the sand of the seashore, and go on to become his + most insistent of masters. Happy, therefore, the man who may choose from + among the gamut of human passions one which is noble! Hour by hour will + that instinct grow and multiply in its measureless beneficence; hour by + hour will it sink deeper and deeper into the infinite paradise of his + soul. But there are passions of which a man cannot rid himself, seeing + that they are born with him at his birth, and he has no power to abjure + them. Higher powers govern those passions, and in them is something which + will call to him, and refuse to be silenced, to the end of his life. Yes, + whether in a guise of darkness, or whether in a guise which will become + converted into a light to lighten the world, they will and must attain + their consummation on life’s field: and in either case they have been + evoked for man’s good. In the same way may the passion which drew our + Chichikov onwards have been one that was independent of himself; in the + same way may there have lurked even in his cold essence something which + will one day cause men to humble themselves in the dust before the + infinite wisdom of God. + </p> + <p> + Yet that folk should be dissatisfied with my hero matters nothing. What + matters is the fact that, under different circumstances, their approval + could have been taken as a foregone conclusion. That is to say, had not + the author pried over-deeply into Chichikov’s soul, nor stirred up in its + depths what shunned and lay hidden from the light, nor disclosed those of + his hero’s thoughts which that hero would have not have disclosed even to + his most intimate friend; had the author, indeed, exhibited Chichikov just + as he exhibited himself to the townsmen of N. and Manilov and the rest; + well, then we may rest assured that every reader would have been delighted + with him, and have voted him a most interesting person. For it is not + nearly so necessary that Chichikov should figure before the reader as + though his form and person were actually present to the eye as that, on + concluding a perusal of this work, the reader should be able to return, + unharrowed in soul, to that cult of the card-table which is the solace and + delight of all good Russians. Yes, readers of this book, none of you + really care to see humanity revealed in its nakedness. “Why should we do + so?” you say. “What would be the use of it? Do we not know for ourselves + that human life contains much that is gross and contemptible? Do we not + with our own eyes have to look upon much that is anything but comforting? + Far better would it be if you would put before us what is comely and + attractive, so that we might forget ourselves a little.” In the same + fashion does a landowner say to his bailiff: “Why do you come and tell me + that the affairs of my estate are in a bad way? I know that without YOUR + help. Have you nothing else to tell me? Kindly allow me to forget the + fact, or else to remain in ignorance of it, and I shall be much obliged to + you.” Whereafter the said landowner probably proceeds to spend on his + diversion the money which ought to have gone towards the rehabilitation of + his affairs. + </p> + <p> + Possibly the author may also incur censure at the hands of those so-called + “patriots” who sit quietly in corners, and become capitalists through + making fortunes at the expense of others. Yes, let but something which + they conceive to be derogatory to their country occur—for instance, + let there be published some book which voices the bitter truth—and + out they will come from their hiding-places like a spider which perceives + a fly to be caught in its web. “Is it well to proclaim this to the world, + and to set folk talking about it?” they will cry. “What you have described + touches US, is OUR affair. Is conduct of that kind right? What will + foreigners say? Does any one care calmly to sit by and hear himself + traduced? Why should you lead foreigners to suppose that all is not well + with us, and that we are not patriotic?” Well, to these sage remarks no + answer can really be returned, especially to such of the above as refer to + foreign opinion. But see here. There once lived in a remote corner of + Russia two natives of the region indicated. One of those natives was a + good man named Kifa Mokievitch, and a man of kindly disposition; a man who + went through life in a dressing-gown, and paid no heed to his household, + for the reason that his whole being was centred upon the province of + speculation, and that, in particular, he was preoccupied with a + philosophical problem usually stated by him thus: “A beast,” he would say, + “is born naked. Now, why should that be? Why should not a beast be born as + a bird is born—that is to say, through the process of being hatched + from an egg? Nature is beyond the understanding, however much one may + probe her.” This was the substance of Kifa Mokievitch’s reflections. But + herein is not the chief point. The other of the pair was a fellow named + Mofi Kifovitch, and son to the first named. He was what we Russians call a + “hero,” and while his father was pondering the parturition of beasts, his, + the son’s, lusty, twenty-year-old temperament was violently struggling for + development. Yet that son could tackle nothing without some accident + occurring. At one moment would he crack some one’s fingers in half, and at + another would he raise a bump on somebody’s nose; so that both at home and + abroad every one and everything—from the serving-maid to the + yard-dog—fled on his approach, and even the bed in his bedroom + became shattered to splinters. Such was Mofi Kifovitch; and with it all he + had a kindly soul. But herein is not the chief point. “Good sir, good Kifa + Mokievitch,” servants and neighbours would come and say to the father, + “what are you going to do about your Moki Kifovitch? We get no rest from + him, he is so above himself.” “That is only his play, that is only his + play,” the father would reply. “What else can you expect? It is too late + now to start a quarrel with him, and, moreover, every one would accuse me + of harshness. True, he is a little conceited; but, were I to reprove him + in public, the whole thing would become common talk, and folk would begin + giving him a dog’s name. And if they did that, would not their opinion + touch me also, seeing that I am his father? Also, I am busy with + philosophy, and have no time for such things. Lastly, Moki Kifovitch is my + son, and very dear to my heart.” And, beating his breast, Kifa Mokievitch + again asserted that, even though his son should elect to continue his + pranks, it would not be for HIM, for the father, to proclaim the fact, or + to fall out with his offspring. And, this expression of paternal feeling + uttered, Kifa Mokievitch left Moki Kifovitch to his heroic exploits, and + himself returned to his beloved subject of speculation, which now included + also the problem, “Suppose elephants were to take to being hatched from + eggs, would not the shell of such eggs be of a thickness proof against + cannonballs, and necessitate the invention of some new type of firearm?” + Thus at the end of this little story we have these two denizens of a + peaceful corner of Russia looking thence, as from a window, in less terror + of doing what was scandalous than of having it SAID of them that they were + acting scandalously. Yes, the feeling animating our so-called “patriots” + is not true patriotism at all. Something else lies beneath it. Who, if not + an author, is to speak aloud the truth? Men like you, my pseudo-patriots, + stand in dread of the eye which is able to discern, yet shrink from using + your own, and prefer, rather, to glance at everything unheedingly. Yes, + after laughing heartily over Chichikov’s misadventures, and perhaps even + commending the author for his dexterity of observation and pretty turn of + wit, you will look at yourselves with redoubled pride and a self-satisfied + smile, and add: “Well, we agree that in certain parts of the provinces + there exists strange and ridiculous individuals, as well as unconscionable + rascals.” + </p> + <p> + Yet which of you, when quiet, and alone, and engaged in solitary + self-communion, would not do well to probe YOUR OWN souls, and to put to + YOURSELVES the solemn question, “Is there not in ME an element of + Chichikov?” For how should there not be? Which of you is not liable at any + moment to be passed in the street by an acquaintance who, nudging his + neighbour, may say of you, with a barely suppressed sneer: “Look! there + goes Chichikov! That is Chichikov who has just gone by!” + </p> + <p> + But here are we talking at the top of our voices whilst all the time our + hero lies slumbering in his britchka! Indeed, his name has been repeated + so often during the recital of his life’s history that he must almost have + heard us! And at any time he is an irritable, irascible fellow when spoken + of with disrespect. True, to the reader Chichikov’s displeasure cannot + matter a jot; but for the author it would mean ruin to quarrel with his + hero, seeing that, arm in arm, Chichikov and he have yet far to go. + </p> + <p> + “Tut, tut, tut!” came in a shout from Chichikov. “Hi, Selifan!” + </p> + <p> + “What is it?” came the reply, uttered with a drawl. + </p> + <p> + “What is it? Why, how dare you drive like that? Come! Bestir yourself a + little!” + </p> + <p> + And indeed, Selifan had long been sitting with half-closed eyes, and hands + which bestowed no encouragement upon his somnolent steeds save an + occasional flicking of the reins against their flanks; whilst Petrushka + had lost his cap, and was leaning backwards until his head had come to + rest against Chichikov’s knees—a position which necessitated his + being awakened with a cuff. Selifan also roused himself, and apportioned + to the skewbald a few cuts across the back of a kind which at least had + the effect of inciting that animal to trot; and when, presently, the other + two horses followed their companion’s example, the light britchka moved + forwards like a piece of thistledown. Selifan flourished his whip and + shouted, “Hi, hi!” as the inequalities of the road jerked him vertically + on his seat; and meanwhile, reclining against the leather cushions of the + vehicle’s interior, Chichikov smiled with gratification at the sensation + of driving fast. For what Russian does not love to drive fast? Which of us + does not at times yearn to give his horses their head, and to let them go, + and to cry, “To the devil with the world!”? At such moments a great force + seems to uplift one as on wings; and one flies, and everything else flies, + but contrariwise—both the verst stones, and traders riding on the + shafts of their waggons, and the forest with dark lines of spruce and fir + amid which may be heard the axe of the woodcutter and the croaking of the + raven. Yes, out of a dim, remote distance the road comes towards one, and + while nothing save the sky and the light clouds through which the moon is + cleaving her way seem halted, the brief glimpses wherein one can discern + nothing clearly have in them a pervading touch of mystery. Ah, troika, + troika, swift as a bird, who was it first invented you? Only among a hardy + race of folk can you have come to birth—only in a land which, though + poor and rough, lies spread over half the world, and spans versts the + counting whereof would leave one with aching eyes. Nor are you a + modishly-fashioned vehicle of the road—a thing of clamps and iron. + Rather, you are a vehicle but shapen and fitted with the axe or chisel of + some handy peasant of Yaroslav. Nor are you driven by a coachman clothed + in German livery, but by a man bearded and mittened. See him as he mounts, + and flourishes his whip, and breaks into a long-drawn song! Away like the + wind go the horses, and the wheels, with their spokes, become transparent + circles, and the road seems to quiver beneath them, and a pedestrian, with + a cry of astonishment, halts to watch the vehicle as it flies, flies, + flies on its way until it becomes lost on the ultimate horizon—a + speck amid a cloud of dust! + </p> + <p> + And you, Russia of mine—are not you also speeding like a troika + which nought can overtake? Is not the road smoking beneath your wheels, + and the bridges thundering as you cross them, and everything being left in + the rear, and the spectators, struck with the portent, halting to wonder + whether you be not a thunderbolt launched from heaven? What does that + awe-inspiring progress of yours foretell? What is the unknown force which + lies within your mysterious steeds? Surely the winds themselves must abide + in their manes, and every vein in their bodies be an ear stretched to + catch the celestial message which bids them, with iron-girded breasts, and + hooves which barely touch the earth as they gallop, fly forward on a + mission of God? Whither, then, are you speeding, O Russia of mine? + Whither? Answer me! But no answer comes—only the weird sound of your + collar-bells. Rent into a thousand shreds, the air roars past you, for you + are overtaking the whole world, and shall one day force all nations, all + empires to stand aside, to give you way! + </p> +<p class="right"> + 1841. +</p> <p> + <a id="link2H_PART2"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h2> + PART II + </h2> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0012"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER I + </h3> + <p> + Why do I so persistently paint the poverty, the imperfections of Russian + life, and delve into the remotest depths, the most retired holes and + corners, of our Empire for my subjects? The answer is that there is + nothing else to be done when an author’s idiosyncrasy happens to incline + him that way. So again we find ourselves in a retired spot. But what a + spot! + </p> + <p> + Imagine, if you can, a mountain range like a gigantic fortress, with + embrasures and bastions which appear to soar a thousand versts towards the + heights of heaven, and, towering grandly over a boundless expanse of + plain, are broken up into precipitous, overhanging limestone cliffs. Here + and there those cliffs are seamed with water-courses and gullies, while at + other points they are rounded off into spurs of green—spurs now + coated with fleece-like tufts of young undergrowth, now studded with the + stumps of felled trees, now covered with timber which has, by some + miracle, escaped the woodman’s axe. Also, a river winds awhile between its + banks, then leaves the meadow land, divides into runlets (all flashing in + the sun like fire), plunges, re-united, into the midst of a thicket of + elder, birch, and pine, and, lastly, speeds triumphantly past bridges and + mills and weirs which seem to be lying in wait for it at every turn. + </p> + <p> + At one particular spot the steep flank of the mountain range is covered + with billowy verdure of denser growth than the rest; and here the aid of + skilful planting, added to the shelter afforded by a rugged ravine, has + enabled the flora of north and south so to be brought together that, + twined about with sinuous hop-tendrils, the oak, the spruce fir, the wild + pear, the maple, the cherry, the thorn, and the mountain ash either assist + or check one another’s growth, and everywhere cover the declivity with + their straggling profusion. Also, at the edge of the summit there can be + seen mingling with the green of the trees the red roofs of a manorial + homestead, while behind the upper stories of the mansion proper and its + carved balcony and a great semi-circular window there gleam the tiles and + gables of some peasants’ huts. Lastly, over this combination of trees and + roofs there rises—overtopping everything with its gilded, sparkling + steeple—an old village church. On each of its pinnacles a cross of + carved gilt is stayed with supports of similar gilding and design; with + the result that from a distance the gilded portions have the effect of + hanging without visible agency in the air. And the whole—the three + successive tiers of woodland, roofs, and crosses whole—lies + exquisitely mirrored in the river below, where hollow willows, grotesquely + shaped (some of them rooted on the river’s banks, and some in the water + itself, and all drooping their branches until their leaves have formed a + tangle with the water lilies which float on the surface), seem to be + gazing at the marvellous reflection at their feet. + </p> + <p> + Thus the view from below is beautiful indeed. But the view from above is + even better. No guest, no visitor, could stand on the balcony of the + mansion and remain indifferent. So boundless is the panorama revealed that + surprise would cause him to catch at his breath, and exclaim: “Lord of + Heaven, but what a prospect!” Beyond meadows studded with spinneys and + water-mills lie forests belted with green; while beyond, again, there can + be seen showing through the slightly misty air strips of yellow heath, + and, again, wide-rolling forests (as blue as the sea or a cloud), and more + heath, paler than the first, but still yellow. Finally, on the far horizon + a range of chalk-topped hills gleams white, even in dull weather, as + though it were lightened with perpetual sunshine; and here and there on + the dazzling whiteness of its lower slopes some plaster-like, nebulous + patches represent far-off villages which lie too remote for the eye to + discern their details. Indeed, only when the sunlight touches a steeple to + gold does one realise that each such patch is a human settlement. Finally, + all is wrapped in an immensity of silence which even the far, faint echoes + of persons singing in the void of the plain cannot shatter. + </p> + <p> + Even after gazing at the spectacle for a couple of hours or so, the + visitor would still find nothing to say, save: “Lord of Heaven, but what a + prospect!” Then who is the dweller in, the proprietor of, this manor—a + manor to which, as to an impregnable fortress, entrance cannot be gained + from the side where we have been standing, but only from the other + approach, where a few scattered oaks offer hospitable welcome to the + visitor, and then, spreading above him their spacious branches (as in + friendly embrace), accompany him to the facade of the mansion whose top we + have been regarding from the reverse aspect, but which now stands + frontwise on to us, and has, on one side of it, a row of peasants’ huts + with red tiles and carved gables, and, on the other, the village church, + with those glittering golden crosses and gilded open-work charms which + seem to hang suspended in the air? Yes, indeed!—to what fortunate + individual does this corner of the world belong? It belongs to Andrei + Ivanovitch Tientietnikov, landowner of the canton of Tremalakhan, and, + withal, a bachelor of about thirty. + </p> + <p> + Should my lady readers ask of me what manner of man is Tientietnikov, and + what are his attributes and peculiarities, I should refer them to his + neighbours. Of these, a member of the almost extinct tribe of intelligent + staff officers on the retired list once summed up Tientietnikov in the + phrase, “He is an absolute blockhead;” while a General who resided ten + versts away was heard to remark that “he is a young man who, though not + exactly a fool, has at least too much crowded into his head. I myself + might have been of use to him, for not only do I maintain certain + connections with St. Petersburg, but also—” And the General left his + sentence unfinished. Thirdly, a captain-superintendent of rural police + happened to remark in the course of conversation: “To-morrow I must go and + see Tientietnikov about his arrears.” Lastly, a peasant of Tientietnikov’s + own village, when asked what his barin was like, returned no answer at + all. All of which would appear to show that Tientietnikov was not exactly + looked upon with favour. + </p> + <p> + To speak dispassionately, however, he was not a bad sort of fellow—merely + a star-gazer; and since the world contains many watchers of the skies, why + should Tientietnikov not have been one of them? However, let me describe + in detail a specimen day of his existence—one that will closely + resemble the rest, and then the reader will be enabled to judge of + Tientietnikov’s character, and how far his life corresponded to the + beauties of nature with which he lived surrounded. + </p> + <p> + On the morning of the specimen day in question he awoke very late, and, + raising himself to a sitting posture, rubbed his eyes. And since those + eyes were small, the process of rubbing them occupied a very long time, + and throughout its continuance there stood waiting by the door his valet, + Mikhailo, armed with a towel and basin. For one hour, for two hours, did + poor Mikhailo stand there: then he departed to the kitchen, and returned + to find his master still rubbing his eyes as he sat on the bed. At length, + however, Tientietnikov rose, washed himself, donned a dressing-gown, and + moved into the drawing-room for morning tea, coffee, cocoa, and warm milk; + of all of which he partook but sparingly, while munching a piece of bread, + and scattering tobacco ash with complete insouciance. Two hours did he sit + over this meal, then poured himself out another cup of the rapidly cooling + tea, and walked to the window. This faced the courtyard, and outside it, + as usual, there took place the following daily altercation between a serf + named Grigory (who purported to act as butler) and the housekeeper, + Perfilievna. + </p> + <p> + Grigory. Ah, you nuisance, you good-for-nothing, you had better hold your + stupid tongue. + </p> + <p> + Perfilievna. Yes; and don’t you wish that I would? + </p> + <p> + Grigory. What? You so thick with that bailiff of yours, you housekeeping + jade! + </p> + <p> + Perfilievna. Nay, he is as big a thief as you are. Do you think the barin + doesn’t know you? And there he is! He must have heard everything! + </p> + <p> + Grigory. Where? + </p> + <p> + Perfilievna. There—sitting by the window, and looking at us! + </p> + <p> + Next, to complete the hubbub, a serf child which had been clouted by its + mother broke out into a bawl, while a borzoi puppy which had happened to + get splashed with boiling water by the cook fell to yelping vociferously. + In short, the place soon became a babel of shouts and squeals, and, after + watching and listening for a time, the barin found it so impossible to + concentrate his mind upon anything that he sent out word that the noise + would have to be abated. + </p> + <p> + The next item was that, a couple of hours before luncheon time, he + withdrew to his study, to set about employing himself upon a weighty work + which was to consider Russia from every point of view: from the political, + from the philosophical, and from the religious, as well as to resolve + various problems which had arisen to confront the Empire, and to define + clearly the great future to which the country stood ordained. In short, it + was to be the species of compilation in which the man of the day so much + delights. Yet the colossal undertaking had progressed but little beyond + the sphere of projection, since, after a pen had been gnawed awhile, and a + few strokes had been committed to paper, the whole would be laid aside in + favour of the reading of some book; and that reading would continue also + during luncheon and be followed by the lighting of a pipe, the playing of + a solitary game of chess, and the doing of more or less nothing for the + rest of the day. + </p> + <p> + The foregoing will give the reader a pretty clear idea of the manner in + which it was possible for this man of thirty-three to waste his time. Clad + constantly in slippers and a dressing-gown, Tientietnikov never went out, + never indulged in any form of dissipation, and never walked upstairs. + Nothing did he care for fresh air, and would bestow not a passing glance + upon all those beauties of the countryside which moved visitors to such + ecstatic admiration. From this the reader will see that Andrei Ivanovitch + Tientietnikov belonged to that band of sluggards whom we always have with + us, and who, whatever be their present appellation, used to be known by + the nicknames of “lollopers,” “bed pressers,” and “marmots.” Whether the + type is a type originating at birth, or a type resulting from untoward + circumstances in later life, it is impossible to say. A better course than + to attempt to answer that question would be to recount the story of + Tientietnikov’s boyhood and upbringing. + </p> + <p> + Everything connected with the latter seemed to promise success, for at + twelve years of age the boy—keen-witted, but dreamy of temperament, + and inclined to delicacy—was sent to an educational establishment + presided over by an exceptional type of master. The idol of his pupils, + and the admiration of his assistants, Alexander Petrovitch was gifted with + an extraordinary measure of good sense. How thoroughly he knew the + peculiarities of the Russian of his day! How well he understood boys! How + capable he was of drawing them out! Not a practical joker in the school + but, after perpetrating a prank, would voluntarily approach his preceptor + and make to him free confession. True, the preceptor would put a stern + face upon the matter, yet the culprit would depart with head held higher, + not lower, than before, since in Alexander Petrovitch there was something + which heartened—something which seemed to say to a delinquent: + “Forward you! Rise to your feet again, even though you have fallen!” Not + lectures on good behaviour was it, therefore, that fell from his lips, but + rather the injunction, “I want to see intelligence, and nothing else. The + boy who devotes his attention to becoming clever will never play the fool, + for under such circumstances, folly disappears of itself.” And so folly + did, for the boy who failed to strive in the desired direction incurred + the contempt of all his comrades, and even dunces and fools of senior + standing did not dare to raise a finger when saluted by their juniors with + opprobrious epithets. Yet “This is too much,” certain folk would say to + Alexander. “The result will be that your students will turn out prigs.” + “But no,” he would reply. “Not at all. You see, I make it my principle to + keep the incapables for a single term only, since that is enough for them; + but to the clever ones I allot a double course of instruction.” And, true + enough, any lad of brains was retained for this finishing course. Yet he + did not repress all boyish playfulness, since he declared it to be as + necessary as a rash to a doctor, inasmuch as it enabled him to diagnose + what lay hidden within. + </p> + <p> + Consequently, how the boys loved him! Never was there such an attachment + between master and pupils. And even later, during the foolish years, when + foolish things attract, the measure of affection which Alexander + Petrovitch retained was extraordinary. In fact, to the day of his death, + every former pupil would celebrate the birthday of his late master by + raising his glass in gratitude to the mentor dead and buried—then + close his eyelids upon the tears which would come trickling through them. + Even the slightest word of encouragement from Alexander Petrovitch could + throw a lad into a transport of tremulous joy, and arouse in him an + honourable emulation of his fellows. Boys of small capacity he did not + long retain in his establishment; whereas those who possessed exceptional + talent he put through an extra course of schooling. This senior class—a + class composed of specially-selected pupils—was a very different + affair from what usually obtains in other colleges. Only when a boy had + attained its ranks did Alexander demand of him what other masters + indiscreetly require of mere infants—namely the superior frame of + mind which, while never indulging in mockery, can itself bear ridicule, + and disregard the fool, and keep its temper, and repress itself, and + eschew revenge, and calmly, proudly retain its tranquillity of soul. In + short, whatever avails to form a boy into a man of assured character, that + did Alexander Petrovitch employ during the pupil’s youth, as well as + constantly put him to the test. How well he understood the art of life! + </p> + <p> + Of assistant tutors he kept but few, since most of the necessary + instruction he imparted in person, and, without pedantic terminology and + inflated diction and views, could so transmit to his listeners the inmost + spirit of a lesson that even the youngest present absorbed its essential + elements. Also, of studies he selected none but those which may help a boy + to become a good citizen; and therefore most of the lectures which he + delivered consisted of discourses on what may be awaiting a youth, as well + as of such demarcations of life’s field that the pupil, though seated, as + yet, only at the desk, could beforehand bear his part in that field both + in thought and spirit. Nor did the master CONCEAL anything. That is to + say, without mincing words, he invariably set before his hearers the + sorrows and the difficulties which may confront a man, the trials and the + temptations which may beset him. And this he did in terms as though, in + every possible calling and capacity, he himself had experienced the same. + Consequently, either the vigorous development of self-respect or the + constant stimulus of the master’s eye (which seemed to say to the pupil, + “Forward!”—that word which has become so familiar to the + contemporary Russian, that word which has worked such wonders upon his + sensitive temperament); one or the other, I repeat, would from the first + cause the pupil to tackle difficulties, and only difficulties, and to + hunger for prowess only where the path was arduous, and obstacles were + many, and it was necessary to display the utmost strength of mind. Indeed, + few completed the course of which I have spoken without issuing therefrom + reliable, seasoned fighters who could keep their heads in the most + embarrassing of official positions, and at times when older and wiser men, + distracted with the annoyances of life, had either abandoned everything + or, grown slack and indifferent, had surrendered to the bribe-takers and + the rascals. In short, no ex-pupil of Alexander Petrovitch ever wavered + from the right road, but, familiar with life and with men, armed with the + weapons of prudence, exerted a powerful influence upon wrongdoers. + </p> + <p> + For a long time past the ardent young Tientietnikov’s excitable heart had + also beat at the thought that one day he might attain the senior class + described. And, indeed, what better teacher could he have had befall him + than its preceptor? Yet just at the moment when he had been transferred + thereto, just at the moment when he had reached the coveted position, did + his instructor come suddenly by his death! This was indeed a blow for the + boy—indeed a terrible initial loss! In his eyes everything connected + with the school seemed to undergo a change—the chief reason being + the fact that to the place of the deceased headmaster there succeeded a + certain Thedor Ivanovitch, who at once began to insist upon certain + external rules, and to demand of the boys what ought rightly to have been + demanded only of adults. That is to say, since the lads’ frank and open + demeanour savoured to him only of lack of discipline, he announced (as + though in deliberate spite of his predecessor) that he cared nothing for + progress and intellect, but that heed was to be paid only to good + behaviour. Yet, curiously enough, good behaviour was just what he never + obtained, for every kind of secret prank became the rule; and while, by + day, there reigned restraint and conspiracy, by night there began to take + place chambering and wantonness. + </p> + <p> + Also, certain changes in the curriculum of studies came about, for there + were engaged new teachers who held new views and opinions, and confused + their hearers with a multitude of new terms and phrases, and displayed in + their exposition of things both logical sequence and a zest for modern + discovery and much warmth of individual bias. Yet their instruction, alas! + contained no LIFE—in the mouths of those teachers a dead language + savoured merely of carrion. Thus everything connected with the school + underwent a radical alteration, and respect for authority and the + authorities waned, and tutors and ushers came to be dubbed “Old Thedor,” + “Crusty,” and the like. And sundry other things began to take place—things + which necessitated many a penalty and expulsion; until, within a couple of + years, no one who had known the school in former days would now have + recognised it. + </p> + <p> + Nevertheless Tientietnikov, a youth of retiring disposition, experienced + no leanings towards the nocturnal orgies of his companions, orgies during + which the latter used to flirt with damsels before the very windows of the + headmaster’s rooms, nor yet towards their mockery of all that was sacred, + simply because fate had cast in their way an injudicious priest. No, + despite its dreaminess, his soul ever remembered its celestial origin, and + could not be diverted from the path of virtue. Yet still he hung his head, + for, while his ambition had come to life, it could find no sort of outlet. + Truly ‘twere well if it had NOT come to life, for throughout the time that + he was listening to professors who gesticulated on their chairs he could + not help remembering the old preceptor who, invariably cool and calm, had + yet known how to make himself understood. To what subjects, to what + lectures, did the boy not have to listen!—to lectures on medicine, + and on philosophy, and on law, and on a version of general history so + enlarged that even three years failed to enable the professor to do more + than finish the introduction thereto, and also the account of the + development of some self-governing towns in Germany. None of the stuff + remained fixed in Tientietnikov’s brain save as shapeless clots; for + though his native intellect could not tell him how instruction ought to be + imparted, it at least told him that THIS was not the way. And frequently, + at such moments he would recall Alexander Petrovitch, and give way to such + grief that scarcely did he know what he was doing. + </p> + <p> + But youth is fortunate in the fact that always before it there lies a + future; and in proportion as the time for his leaving school drew nigh, + Tientietnikov’s heart began to beat higher and higher, and he said to + himself: “This is not life, but only a preparation for life. True life is + to be found in the Public Service. There at least will there be scope for + activity.” So, bestowing not a glance upon that beautiful corner of the + world which never failed to strike the guest or chance visitor with + amazement, and reverencing not a whit the dust of his ancestors, he + followed the example of most ambitious men of his class by repairing to + St. Petersburg (whither, as we know, the more spirited youth of Russia + from every quarter gravitates—there to enter the Public Service, to + shine, to obtain promotion, and, in a word, to scale the topmost peaks of + that pale, cold, deceptive elevation which is known as society). But the + real starting-point of Tientietnikov’s ambition was the moment when his + uncle (one State Councillor Onifri Ivanovitch) instilled into him the + maxim that the only means to success in the Service lay in good + handwriting, and that, without that accomplishment, no one could ever hope + to become a Minister or Statesman. Thus, with great difficulty, and also + with the help of his uncle’s influence, young Tientietnikov at length + succeeded in being posted to a Department. On the day that he was + conducted into a splendid, shining hall—a hall fitted with inlaid + floors and lacquered desks as fine as though this were actually the place + where the great ones of the Empire met for discussion of the fortunes of + the State; on the day that he saw legions of handsome gentlemen of the + quill-driving profession making loud scratchings with pens, and cocking + their heads to one side; lastly on the day that he saw himself also + allotted a desk, and requested to copy a document which appeared purposely + to be one of the pettiest possible order (as a matter of fact it related + to a sum of three roubles, and had taken half a year to produce)—well, + at that moment a curious, an unwonted sensation seized upon the + inexperienced youth, for the gentlemen around him appeared so exactly like + a lot of college students. And, the further to complete the resemblance, + some of them were engaged in reading trashy translated novels, which they + kept hurriedly thrusting between the sheets of their apportioned work + whenever the Director appeared, as though to convey the impression that it + was to that work alone that they were applying themselves. In short, the + scene seemed to Tientietnikov strange, and his former pursuits more + important than his present, and his preparation for the Service preferable + to the Service itself. Yes, suddenly he felt a longing for his old school; + and as suddenly, and with all the vividness of life, there appeared before + his vision the figure of Alexander Petrovitch. He almost burst into tears + as he beheld his old master, and the room seemed to swim before his eyes, + and the tchinovniks and the desks to become a blur, and his sight to grow + dim. Then he thought to himself with an effort: “No, no! I WILL apply + myself to my work, however petty it be at first.” And hardening his heart + and recovering his spirit, he determined then and there to perform his + duties in such a manner as should be an example to the rest. + </p> + <p> + But where are compensations to be found? Even in St. Petersburg, despite + its grim and murky exterior, they exist. Yes, even though thirty degrees + of keen, cracking frost may have bound the streets, and the family of the + North Wind be wailing there, and the Snowstorm Witch have heaped high the + pavements, and be blinding the eyes, and powdering beards and fur collars + and the shaggy manes of horses—even THEN there will be shining + hospitably through the swirling snowflakes a fourth-floor window where, in + a cosy room, and by the light of modest candles, and to the hiss of the + samovar, there will be in progress a discussion which warms the heart and + soul, or else a reading aloud of a brilliant page of one of those inspired + Russian poets with whom God has dowered us, while the breast of each + member of the company is heaving with a rapture unknown under a noontide + sky. + </p> + <p> + Gradually, therefore, Tientietnikov grew more at home in the Service. Yet + never did it become, for him, the main pursuit, the main object in life, + which he had expected. No, it remained but one of a secondary kind. That + is to say, it served merely to divide up his time, and enable him the more + to value his hours of leisure. Nevertheless, just when his uncle was + beginning to flatter himself that his nephew was destined to succeed in + the profession, the said nephew elected to ruin his every hope. Thus it + befell. Tientietnikov’s friends (he had many) included among their number + a couple of fellows of the species known as “embittered.” That is to say, + though good-natured souls of that curiously restless type which cannot + endure injustice, nor anything which it conceives to be such, they were + thoroughly unbalanced of conduct themselves, and, while demanding general + agreement with their views, treated those of others with the scantiest of + ceremony. Nevertheless these two associates exercised upon Tientietnikov—both + by the fire of their eloquence and by the form of their noble + dissatisfaction with society—a very strong influence; with the + result that, through arousing in him an innate tendency to nervous + resentment, they led him also to notice trifles which before had escaped + his attention. An instance of this is seen in the fact that he conceived + against Thedor Thedorovitch Lienitsin, Director of one of the Departments + which was quartered in the splendid range of offices before mentioned, a + dislike which proved the cause of his discerning in the man a host of + hitherto unmarked imperfections. Above all things did Tientietnikov take + it into his head that, when conversing with his superiors, Lienitsin + became, of the moment, a stick of luscious sweetmeat, but that, when + conversing with his inferiors, he approximated more to a vinegar cruet. + Certain it is that, like all petty-minded individuals, Lienitsin made a + note of any one who failed to offer him a greeting on festival days, and + that he revenged himself upon any one whose visiting-card had not been + handed to his butler. Eventually the youth’s aversion almost attained the + point of hysteria; until he felt that, come what might, he MUST insult the + fellow in some fashion. To that task he applied himself con amore; and so + thoroughly that he met with complete success. That is to say, he seized on + an occasion to address Lienitsin in such fashion that the delinquent + received notice either to apologise or to leave the Service; and when of + these alternatives he chose the latter his uncle came to him, and made a + terrified appeal. “For God’s sake remember what you are doing!” he cried. + “To think that, after beginning your career so well, you should abandon it + merely for the reason that you have not fallen in with the sort of + Director whom you prefer! What do you mean by it, what do you mean by it? + Were others to regard things in the same way, the Service would find + itself without a single individual. Reconsider your conduct—forego + your pride and conceit, and make Lienitsin amends.” + </p> + <p> + “But, dear Uncle,” the nephew replied, “that is not the point. The point + is, not that I should find an apology difficult to offer, seeing that, + since Lienitsin is my superior, and I ought not to have addressed him as I + did, I am clearly in the wrong. Rather, the point is the following. To my + charge there has been committed the performance of another kind of + service. That is to say, I am the owner of three hundred peasant souls, a + badly administered estate, and a fool of a bailiff. That being so, whereas + the State will lose little by having to fill my stool with another + copyist, it will lose very much by causing three hundred peasant souls to + fail in the payment of their taxes. As I say (how am I to put it?), I am a + landowner who has preferred to enter the Public Service. Now, should I + employ myself henceforth in conserving, restoring, and improving the + fortunes of the souls whom God has entrusted to my care, and thereby + provide the State with three hundred law-abiding, sober, hard-working + taxpayers, how will that service of mine rank as inferior to the service + of a department-directing fool like Lienitsin?” + </p> + <p> + On hearing this speech, the State Councillor could only gape, for he had + not expected Tientietnikov’s torrent of words. He reflected a few moments, + and then murmured: + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but, but—but how can a man like you retire to rustication in + the country? What society will you get there? Here one meets at least a + general or a prince sometimes; indeed, no matter whom you pass in the + street, that person represents gas lamps and European civilisation; but in + the country, no matter what part of it you are in, not a soul is to be + encountered save muzhiks and their women. Why should you go and condemn + yourself to a state of vegetation like that?” + </p> + <p> + Nevertheless the uncle’s expostulations fell upon deaf ears, for already + the nephew was beginning to think of his estate as a retreat of a type + more likely to nourish the intellectual faculties and afford the only + profitable field of activity. After unearthing one or two modern works on + agriculture, therefore, he, two weeks later, found himself in the + neighbourhood of the home where his boyhood had been spent, and + approaching the spot which never failed to enthral the visitor or guest. + And in the young man’s breast there was beginning to palpitate a new + feeling—in the young man’s soul there were reawakening old, + long-concealed impressions; with the result that many a spot which had + long been faded from his memory now filled him with interest, and the + beautiful views on the estate found him gazing at them like a newcomer, + and with a beating heart. Yes, as the road wound through a narrow ravine, + and became engulfed in a forest where, both above and below, he saw + three-centuries-old oaks which three men could not have spanned, and where + Siberian firs and elms overtopped even the poplars, and as he asked the + peasants to tell him to whom the forest belonged, and they replied, “To + Tientietnikov,” and he issued from the forest, and proceeded on his way + through meadows, and past spinneys of elder, and of old and young willows, + and arrived in sight of the distant range of hills, and, crossing by two + different bridges the winding river (which he left successively to right + and to left of him as he did so), he again questioned some peasants + concerning the ownership of the meadows and the flooded lands, and was + again informed that they all belonged to Tientietnikov, and then, + ascending a rise, reached a tableland where, on one side, lay ungarnered + fields of wheat and rye and barley, and, on the other, the country already + traversed (but which now showed in shortened perspective), and then + plunged into the shade of some forked, umbrageous trees which stood + scattered over turf and extended to the manor-house itself, and caught + glimpses of the carved huts of the peasants, and of the red roofs of the + stone manorial outbuildings, and of the glittering pinnacles of the + church, and felt his heart beating, and knew, without being told by any + one, whither he had at length arrived—well, then the feeling which + had been growing within his soul burst forth, and he cried in ecstasy: + </p> + <p> + “Why have I been a fool so long? Why, seeing that fate has appointed me to + be ruler of an earthly paradise, did I prefer to bind myself in servitude + as a scribe of lifeless documents? To think that, after I had been + nurtured and schooled and stored with all the knowledge necessary for the + diffusion of good among those under me, and for the improvement of my + domain, and for the fulfilment of the manifold duties of a landowner who + is at once judge, administrator, and constable of his people, I should + have entrusted my estate to an ignorant bailiff, and sought to maintain an + absentee guardianship over the affairs of serfs whom I have never met, and + of whose capabilities and characters I am yet ignorant! To think that I + should have deemed true estate-management inferior to a documentary, + fantastical management of provinces which lie a thousand versts away, and + which my foot has never trod, and where I could never have effected aught + but blunders and irregularities!” + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile another spectacle was being prepared for him. On learning that + the barin was approaching the mansion, the muzhiks collected on the + verandah in very variety of picturesque dress and tonsure; and when these + good folk surrounded him, and there arose a resounding shout of “Here is + our Foster Father! He has remembered us!” and, in spite of themselves, + some of the older men and women began weeping as they recalled his + grandfather and great-grandfather, he himself could not restrain his + tears, but reflected: “How much affection! And in return for what? In + return for my never having come to see them—in return for my never + having taken the least interest in their affairs!” And then and there he + registered a mental vow to share their every task and occupation. + </p> + <p> + So he applied himself to supervising and administering. He reduced the + amount of the barstchina <a href="#linknote-40" id="linknoteref-40"><small>40</small></a>, he decreased the number of + working-days for the owner, and he augmented the sum of the peasants’ + leisure-time. He also dismissed the fool of a bailiff, and took to bearing + a personal hand in everything—to being present in the fields, at the + threshing-floor, at the kilns, at the wharf, at the freighting of barges + and rafts, and at their conveyance down the river: wherefore even the lazy + hands began to look to themselves. But this did not last long. The peasant + is an observant individual, and Tientietnikov’s muzhiks soon scented the + fact that, though energetic and desirous of doing much, the barin had no + notion how to do it, nor even how to set about it—that, in short, he + spoke by the book rather than out of his personal knowledge. Consequently + things resulted, not in master and men failing to understand one another, + but in their not singing together, in their not producing the very same + note. + </p> + <p> + That is to say, it was not long before Tientietnikov noticed that on the + manorial lands, nothing prospered to the extent that it did on the + peasants’. The manorial crops were sown in good time, and came up well, + and every one appeared to work his best, so much so that Tientietnikov, + who supervised the whole, frequently ordered mugs of vodka to be served + out as a reward for the excellence of the labour performed. Yet the rye on + the peasants’ land had formed into ear, and the oats had begun to shoot + their grain, and the millet had filled before, on the manorial lands, the + corn had so much as grown to stalk, or the ears had sprouted in embryo. In + short, gradually the barin realised that, in spite of favours conferred, + the peasants were playing the rogue with him. Next he resorted to + remonstrance, but was met with the reply, “How could we not do our best + for our barin? You yourself saw how well we laboured at the ploughing and + the sowing, for you gave us mugs of vodka for our pains.” + </p> + <p> + “Then why have things turned out so badly?” the barin persisted. + </p> + <p> + “Who can say? It must be that a grub has eaten the crop from below. + Besides, what a summer has it been—never a drop of rain!” + </p> + <p> + Nevertheless, the barin noted that no grub had eaten the PEASANTS’ crops, + as well as that the rain had fallen in the most curious fashion—namely, + in patches. It had obliged the muzhiks, but had shed a mere sprinkling for + the barin. + </p> + <p> + Still more difficult did he find it to deal with the peasant women. Ever + and anon they would beg to be excused from work, or start making + complaints of the severity of the barstchina. Indeed, they were terrible + folk! However, Tientietnikov abolished the majority of the tithes of + linen, hedge fruit, mushrooms, and nuts, and also reduced by one-half + other tasks proper to the women, in the hope that they would devote their + spare time to their own domestic concerns—namely, to sewing and + mending, and to making clothes for their husbands, and to increasing the + area of their kitchen gardens. Yet no such result came about. On the + contrary, such a pitch did the idleness, the quarrelsomeness, and the + intriguing and caballing of the fair sex attain that their helpmeets were + for ever coming to the barin with a request that he would rid one or + another of his wife, since she had become a nuisance, and to live with her + was impossible. + </p> + <p> + Next, hardening his heart, the barin attempted severity. But of what avail + was severity? The peasant woman remained always the peasant woman, and + would come and whine that she was sick and ailing, and keep pitifully + hugging to herself the mean and filthy rags which she had donned for the + occasion. And when poor Tientietnikov found himself unable to say more to + her than just, “Get out of my sight, and may the Lord go with you!” the + next item in the comedy would be that he would see her, even as she was + leaving his gates, fall to contending with a neighbour for, say, the + possession of a turnip, and dealing out slaps in the face such as even a + strong, healthy man could scarcely have compassed! + </p> + <p> + Again, amongst other things, Tientietnikov conceived the idea of + establishing a school for his people; but the scheme resulted in a farce + which left him in sackcloth and ashes. In the same way he found that, when + it came to a question of dispensing justice and of adjusting disputes, the + host of juridical subtleties with which the professors had provided him + proved absolutely useless. That is to say, the one party lied, and the + other party lied, and only the devil could have decided between them. + Consequently he himself perceived that a knowledge of mankind would have + availed him more than all the legal refinements and philosophical maxims + in the world could do. He lacked something; and though he could not divine + what it was, the situation brought about was the common one of the barin + failing to understand the peasant, and the peasant failing to understand + the barin, and both becoming disaffected. In the end, these difficulties + so chilled Tientietnikov’s enthusiasm that he took to supervising the + labours of the field with greatly diminished attention. That is to say, no + matter whether the scythes were softly swishing through the grass, or + ricks were being built, or rafts were being loaded, he would allow his + eyes to wander from his men, and to fall to gazing at, say, a red-billed, + red-legged heron which, after strutting along the bank of a stream, would + have caught a fish in its beak, and be holding it awhile, as though in + doubt whether to swallow it. Next he would glance towards the spot where a + similar bird, but one not yet in possession of a fish, was engaged in + watching the doings of its mate. Lastly, with eyebrows knitted, and face + turned to scan the zenith, he would drink in the smell of the fields, and + fall to listening to the winged population of the air as from earth and + sky alike the manifold music of winged creatures combined in a single + harmonious chorus. In the rye the quail would be calling, and, in the + grass, the corncrake, and over them would be wheeling flocks of twittering + linnets. Also, the jacksnipe would be uttering its croak, and the lark + executing its roulades where it had become lost in the sunshine, and + cranes sending forth their trumpet-like challenge as they deployed towards + the zenith in triangle-shaped flocks. In fact, the neighbourhood would + seem to have become converted into one great concert of melody. O Creator, + how fair is Thy world where, in remote, rural seclusion, it lies apart + from cities and from highways! + </p> + <p> + But soon even this began to pall upon Tientietnikov, and he ceased + altogether to visit his fields, or to do aught but shut himself up in his + rooms, where he refused to receive even the bailiff when that functionary + called with his reports. Again, although, until now, he had to a certain + extent associated with a retired colonel of hussars—a man saturated + with tobacco smoke—and also with a student of pronounced, but + immature, opinions who culled the bulk of his wisdom from contemporary + newspapers and pamphlets, he found, as time went on, that these companions + proved as tedious as the rest, and came to think their conversation + superficial, and their European method of comporting themselves—that + is to say, the method of conversing with much slapping of knees and a + great deal of bowing and gesticulation—too direct and unadorned. So + these and every one else he decided to “drop,” and carried this resolution + into effect with a certain amount of rudeness. On the next occasion that + Varvar Nikolaievitch Vishnepokromov called to indulge in a free-and-easy + symposium on politics, philosophy, literature, morals, and the state of + financial affairs in England (he was, in all matters which admit of + superficial discussion, the pleasantest fellow alive, seeing that he was a + typical representative both of the retired fire-eater and of the school of + thought which is now becoming the rage)—when, I say, this next + happened, Tientietnikov merely sent out to say that he was not at home, + and then carefully showed himself at the window. Host and guest exchanged + glances, and, while the one muttered through his teeth “The cur!” the + other relieved his feelings with a remark or two on swine. Thus the + acquaintance came to an abrupt end, and from that time forth no visitor + called at the mansion. + </p> + <p> + Tientietnikov in no way regretted this, for he could now devote himself + wholly to the projection of a great work on Russia. Of the scale on which + this composition was conceived the reader is already aware. The reader + also knows how strange, how unsystematic, was the system employed in it. + Yet to say that Tientietnikov never awoke from his lethargy would not be + altogether true. On the contrary, when the post brought him newspapers and + reviews, and he saw in their printed pages, perhaps, the well-known name + of some former comrade who had succeeded in the great field of Public + Service, or had conferred upon science and the world’s work some notable + contribution, he would succumb to secret and suppressed grief, and + involuntarily there would burst from his soul an expression of aching, + voiceless regret that he himself had done so little. And at these times + his existence would seem to him odious and repellent; at these times there + would uprise before him the memory of his school days, and the figure of + Alexander Petrovitch, as vivid as in life. And, slowly welling, the tears + would course over Tientietnikov’s cheeks. + </p> + <p> + What meant these repinings? Was there not disclosed in them the secret of + his galling spiritual pain—the fact that he had failed to order his + life aright, to confirm the lofty aims with which he had started his + course; the fact that, always poorly equipped with experience, he had + failed to attain the better and the higher state, and there to strengthen + himself for the overcoming of hindrances and obstacles; the fact that, + dissolving like overheated metal, his bounteous store of superior + instincts had failed to take the final tempering; the fact that the tutor + of his boyhood, a man in a thousand, had prematurely died, and left to + Tientietnikov no one who could restore to him the moral strength shattered + by vacillation and the will power weakened by want of virility—no + one, in short, who could cry hearteningly to his soul “Forward!”—the + word for which the Russian of every degree, of every class, of every + occupation, of every school of thought, is for ever hungering. + </p> + <p> + Indeed, WHERE is the man who can cry aloud for any of us, in the Russian + tongue dear to our soul, the all-compelling command “Forward!”? Who is + there who, knowing the strength and the nature and the inmost depths of + the Russian genius, can by a single magic incantation divert our ideals to + the higher life? Were there such a man, with what tears, with what + affection, would not the grateful sons of Russia repay him! Yet age + succeeds to age, and our callow youth still lies wrapped in shameful + sloth, or strives and struggles to no purpose. God has not yet given us + the man able to sound the call. + </p> + <p> + One circumstance which almost aroused Tientietnikov, which almost brought + about a revolution in his character, was the fact that he came very near + to falling in love. Yet even this resulted in nothing. Ten versts away + there lived the general whom we have heard expressing himself in highly + uncomplimentary terms concerning Tientietnikov. He maintained a + General-like establishment, dispensed hospitality (that is to say, was + glad when his neighbours came to pay him their respects, though he himself + never went out), spoke always in a hoarse voice, read a certain number of + books, and had a daughter—a curious, unfamiliar type, but full of + life as life itself. This maiden’s name was Ulinka, and she had been + strangely brought up, for, losing her mother in early childhood, she had + subsequently received instruction at the hands of an English governess who + knew not a single word of Russian. Moreover her father, though excessively + fond of her, treated her always as a toy; with the result that, as she + grew to years of discretion, she became wholly wayward and spoilt. Indeed, + had any one seen the sudden rage which would gather on her beautiful young + forehead when she was engaged in a heated dispute with her father, he + would have thought her one of the most capricious beings in the world. Yet + that rage gathered only when she had heard of injustice or harsh + treatment, and never because she desired to argue on her own behalf, or to + attempt to justify her own conduct. Also, that anger would disappear as + soon as ever she saw any one whom she had formerly disliked fall upon evil + times, and, at his first request for alms would, without consideration or + subsequent regret, hand him her purse and its whole contents. Yes, her + every act was strenuous, and when she spoke her whole personality seemed + to be following hot-foot upon her thought—both her expression of + face and her diction and the movements of her hands. Nay, the very folds + of her frock had a similar appearance of striving; until one would have + thought that all her self were flying in pursuit of her words. Nor did she + know reticence: before any one she would disclose her mind, and no force + could compel her to maintain silence when she desired to speak. Also, her + enchanting, peculiar gait—a gait which belonged to her alone—was + so absolutely free and unfettered that every one involuntarily gave her + way. Lastly, in her presence churls seemed to become confused and fall to + silence, and even the roughest and most outspoken would lose their heads, + and have not a word to say; whereas the shy man would find himself able to + converse as never in his life before, and would feel, from the first, as + though he had seen her and known her at some previous period—during + the days of some unremembered childhood, when he was at home, and spending + a merry evening among a crowd of romping children. And for long afterwards + he would feel as though his man’s intellect and estate were a burden. + </p> + <p> + This was what now befell Tientietnikov; and as it did so a new feeling + entered into his soul, and his dreamy life lightened for a moment. + </p> + <p> + At first the General used to receive him with hospitable civility, but + permanent concord between them proved impossible; their conversation + always merged into dissension and soreness, seeing that, while the General + could not bear to be contradicted or worsted in an argument, Tientietnikov + was a man of extreme sensitiveness. True, for the daughter’s sake, the + father was for a while deferred to, and thus peace was maintained; but + this lasted only until the time when there arrived, on a visit to the + General, two kinswomen of his—the Countess Bordirev and the Princess + Uziakin, retired Court dames, but ladies who still kept up a certain + connection with Court circles, and therefore were much fawned upon by + their host. No sooner had they appeared on the scene than (so it seemed to + Tientietnikov) the General’s attitude towards the young man became colder—either + he ceased to notice him at all or he spoke to him familiarly, and as to a + person having no standing in society. This offended Tientietnikov deeply, + and though, when at length he spoke out on the subject, he retained + sufficient presence of mind to compress his lips, and to preserve a gentle + and courteous tone, his face flushed and his inner man was boiling. + </p> + <p> + “General,” he said, “I thank you for your condescension. By addressing me + in the second person singular, you have admitted me to the circle of your + most intimate friends. Indeed, were it not that a difference of years + forbids any familiarity on my part, I should answer you in similar + fashion.” + </p> + <p> + The General sat aghast. At length, rallying his tongue and his faculties, + he replied that, though he had spoken with a lack of ceremony, he had used + the term “thou” merely as an elderly man naturally employs it towards a + junior (he made no reference to difference of rank). + </p> + <p> + Nevertheless, the acquaintance broke off here, and with it any possibility + of love-making. The light which had shed a momentary gleam before + Tientietnikov’s eyes had become extinguished for ever, and upon it there + followed a darkness denser than before. Henceforth everything conduced to + evolve the regime which the reader has noted—that regime of sloth + and inaction which converted Tientietnikov’s residence into a place of + dirt and neglect. For days at a time would a broom and a heap of dust be + left lying in the middle of a room, and trousers tossing about the salon, + and pairs of worn-out braces adorning the what-not near the sofa. In + short, so mean and untidy did Tientietnikov’s mode of life become, that + not only his servants, but even his very poultry ceased to treat him with + respect. Taking up a pen, he would spend hours in idly sketching houses, + huts, waggons, troikas, and flourishes on a piece of paper; while at other + times, when he had sunk into a reverie, the pen would, all unknowingly, + sketch a small head which had delicate features, a pair of quick, + penetrating eyes, and a raised coiffure. Then suddenly the dreamer would + perceive, to his surprise, that the pen had executed the portrait of a + maiden whose picture no artist could adequately have painted; and + therewith his despondency would become greater than ever, and, believing + that happiness did not exist on earth, he would relapse into increased + ennui, increased neglect of his responsibilities. + </p> + <p> + But one morning he noticed, on moving to the window after breakfast, that + not a word was proceeding either from the butler or the housekeeper, but + that, on the contrary, the courtyard seemed to smack of a certain bustle + and excitement. This was because through the entrance gates (which the + kitchen maid and the scullion had run to open) there were appearing the + noses of three horses—one to the right, one in the middle, and one + to the left, after the fashion of triumphal groups of statuary. Above + them, on the box seat, were seated a coachman and a valet, while behind, + again, there could be discerned a gentleman in a scarf and a fur cap. Only + when the equipage had entered the courtyard did it stand revealed as a + light spring britchka. And as it came to a halt, there leapt on to the + verandah of the mansion an individual of respectable exterior, and + possessed of the art of moving with the neatness and alertness of a + military man. + </p> + <p> + Upon this Tientietnikov’s heart stood still. He was unused to receiving + visitors, and for the moment conceived the new arrival to be a Government + official, sent to question him concerning an abortive society to which he + had formerly belonged. (Here the author may interpolate the fact that, in + Tientietnikov’s early days, the young man had become mixed up in a very + absurd affair. That is to say, a couple of philosophers belonging to a + regiment of hussars had, together with an aesthete who had not yet + completed his student’s course and a gambler who had squandered his all, + formed a secret society of philanthropic aims under the presidency of a + certain old rascal of a freemason and the ruined gambler aforesaid. The + scope of the society’s work was to be extensive: it was to bring lasting + happiness to humanity at large, from the banks of the Thames to the shores + of Kamtchatka. But for this much money was needed: wherefore from the + noble-minded members of the society generous contributions were demanded, + and then forwarded to a destination known only to the supreme authorities + of the concern. As for Tientietnikov’s adhesion, it was brought about by + the two friends already alluded to as “embittered”—good-hearted + souls whom the wear and tear of their efforts on behalf of science, + civilisation, and the future emancipation of mankind had ended by + converting into confirmed drunkards. Perhaps it need hardly be said that + Tientietnikov soon discovered how things stood, and withdrew from the + association; but, meanwhile, the latter had had the misfortune so to have + engaged in dealings not wholly creditable to gentlemen of noble origin as + likewise to have become entangled in dealings with the police. + Consequently, it is not to be wondered at that, though Tientietnikov had + long severed his connection with the society and its policy, he still + remained uneasy in his mind as to what might even yet be the result.) + </p> + <p> + However, his fears vanished the instant that the guest saluted him with + marked politeness and explained, with many deferential poises of the head, + and in terms at once civil and concise, that for some time past he (the + newcomer) had been touring the Russian Empire on business and in the + pursuit of knowledge, that the Empire abounded in objects of interest—not + to mention a plenitude of manufactures and a great diversity of soil, and + that, in spite of the fact that he was greatly struck with the amenities + of his host’s domain, he would certainly not have presumed to intrude at + such an inconvenient hour but for the circumstance that the inclement + spring weather, added to the state of the roads, had necessitated sundry + repairs to his carriage at the hands of wheelwrights and blacksmiths. + Finally he declared that, even if this last had NOT happened, he would + still have felt unable to deny himself the pleasure of offering to his + host that meed of homage which was the latter’s due. + </p> + <p> + This speech—a speech of fascinating bonhomie—delivered, the + guest executed a sort of shuffle with a half-boot of patent leather + studded with buttons of mother-of-pearl, and followed that up by (in spite + of his pronounced rotundity of figure) stepping backwards with all the + elan of an india-rubber ball. + </p> + <p> + From this the somewhat reassured Tientietnikov concluded that his visitor + must be a literary, knowledge-seeking professor who was engaged in roaming + the country in search of botanical specimens and fossils; wherefore he + hastened to express both his readiness to further the visitor’s objects + (whatever they might be) and his personal willingness to provide him with + the requisite wheelwrights and blacksmiths. Meanwhile he begged his guest + to consider himself at home, and, after seating him in an armchair, made + preparations to listen to the newcomer’s discourse on natural history. + </p> + <p> + But the newcomer applied himself, rather, to phenomena of the internal + world, saying that his life might be likened to a barque tossed on the + crests of perfidious billows, that in his time he had been fated to play + many parts, and that on more than one occasion his life had stood in + danger at the hands of foes. At the same time, these tidings were + communicated in a manner calculated to show that the speaker was also a + man of PRACTICAL capabilities. In conclusion, the visitor took out a + cambric pocket-handkerchief, and sneezed into it with a vehemence wholly + new to Tientietnikov’s experience. In fact, the sneeze rather resembled + the note which, at times, the trombone of an orchestra appears to utter + not so much from its proper place on the platform as from the immediate + neighbourhood of the listener’s ear. And as the echoes of the drowsy + mansion resounded to the report of the explosion there followed upon the + same a wave of perfume, skilfully wafted abroad with a flourish of the + eau-de-Cologne-scented handkerchief. + </p> + <p> + By this time the reader will have guessed that the visitor was none other + than our old and respected friend Paul Ivanovitch Chichikov. Naturally, + time had not spared him his share of anxieties and alarms; wherefore his + exterior had come to look a trifle more elderly, his frockcoat had taken + on a suggestion of shabbiness, and britchka, coachman, valet, horses, and + harness alike had about them a sort of second-hand, worse-for-wear effect. + Evidently the Chichikovian finances were not in the most flourishing of + conditions. Nevertheless, the old expression of face, the old air of + breeding and refinement, remained unimpaired, and our hero had even + improved in the art of walking and turning with grace, and of dexterously + crossing one leg over the other when taking a seat. Also, his mildness of + diction, his discreet moderation of word and phrase, survived in, if + anything, increased measure, and he bore himself with a skill which caused + his tactfulness to surpass itself in sureness of aplomb. And all these + accomplishments had their effect further heightened by a snowy + immaculateness of collar and dickey, and an absence of dust from his + frockcoat, as complete as though he had just arrived to attend a nameday + festival. Lastly, his cheeks and chin were of such neat clean-shavenness + that no one but a blind man could have failed to admire their rounded + contours. + </p> + <p> + From that moment onwards great changes took place in Tientietnikov’s + establishment, and certain of its rooms assumed an unwonted air of + cleanliness and order. The rooms in question were those assigned to + Chichikov, while one other apartment—a little front chamber opening + into the hall—became permeated with Petrushka’s own peculiar smell. + But this lasted only for a little while, for presently Petrushka was + transferred to the servants’ quarters, a course which ought to have been + adopted in the first instance. + </p> + <p> + During the initial days of Chichikov’s sojourn, Tientietnikov feared + rather to lose his independence, inasmuch as he thought that his guest + might hamper his movements, and bring about alterations in the established + routine of the place. But these fears proved groundless, for Paul + Ivanovitch displayed an extraordinary aptitude for accommodating himself + to his new position. To begin with, he encouraged his host in his + philosophical inertia by saying that the latter would help Tientietnikov + to become a centenarian. Next, in the matter of a life of isolation, he + hit things off exactly by remarking that such a life bred in a man a + capacity for high thinking. Lastly, as he inspected the library and + dilated on books in general, he contrived an opportunity to observe that + literature safeguarded a man from a tendency to waste his time. In short, + the few words of which he delivered himself were brief, but invariably to + the point. And this discretion of speech was outdone by his discretion of + conduct. That is to say, whether entering or leaving the room, he never + wearied his host with a question if Tientietnikov had the air of being + disinclined to talk; and with equal satisfaction the guest could either + play chess or hold his tongue. Consequently Tientietnikov said to himself: + </p> + <p> + “For the first time in my life I have met with a man with whom it is + possible to live. In general, not many of the type exist in Russia, and, + though clever, good-humoured, well-educated men abound, one would be hard + put to it to find an individual of equable temperament with whom one could + share a roof for centuries without a quarrel arising. Anyway, Chichikov is + the first of his sort that I have met.” + </p> + <p> + For his part, Chichikov was only too delighted to reside with a person so + quiet and agreeable as his host. Of a wandering life he was temporarily + weary, and to rest, even for a month, in such a beautiful spot, and in + sight of green fields and the slow flowering of spring, was likely to + benefit him also from the hygienic point of view. And, indeed, a more + delightful retreat in which to recuperate could not possibly have been + found. The spring, long retarded by previous cold, had now begun in all + its comeliness, and life was rampant. Already, over the first emerald of + the grass, the dandelion was showing yellow, and the red-pink anemone was + hanging its tender head; while the surface of every pond was a swarm of + dancing gnats and midges, and the water-spider was being joined in their + pursuit by birds which gathered from every quarter to the vantage-ground + of the dry reeds. Every species of creature also seemed to be assembling + in concourse, and taking stock of one another. Suddenly the earth became + populous, the forest had opened its eyes, and the meadows were lifting up + their voice in song. In the same way had choral dances begun to be weaved + in the village, and everywhere that the eye turned there was merriment. + What brightness in the green of nature, what freshness in the air, what + singing of birds in the gardens of the mansion, what general joy and + rapture and exaltation! Particularly in the village might the shouting and + singing have been in honour of a wedding! + </p> + <p> + Chichikov walked hither, thither, and everywhere—a pursuit for which + there was ample choice and facility. At one time he would direct his steps + along the edge of the flat tableland, and contemplate the depths below, + where still there lay sheets of water left by the floods of winter, and + where the island-like patches of forest showed leafless boughs; while at + another time he would plunge into the thicket and ravine country, where + nests of birds weighted branches almost to the ground, and the sky was + darkened with the criss-cross flight of cawing rooks. Again, the drier + portions of the meadows could be crossed to the river wharves, whence the + first barges were just beginning to set forth with pea-meal and barley and + wheat, while at the same time one’s ear would be caught with the sound of + some mill resuming its functions as once more the water turned the wheel. + Chichikov would also walk afield to watch the early tillage operations of + the season, and observe how the blackness of a new furrow would make its + way across the expanse of green, and how the sower, rhythmically striking + his hand against the pannier slung across his breast, would scatter his + fistfuls of seed with equal distribution, apportioning not a grain too + much to one side or to the other. + </p> + <p> + In fact, Chichikov went everywhere. He chatted and talked, now with the + bailiff, now with a peasant, now with a miller, and inquired into the + manner and nature of everything, and sought information as to how an + estate was managed, and at what price corn was selling, and what species + of grain was best for spring and autumn grinding, and what was the name of + each peasant, and who were his kinsfolk, and where he had bought his cow, + and what he fed his pigs on. Chichikov also made inquiry concerning the + number of peasants who had lately died: but of these there appeared to be + few. And suddenly his quick eye discerned that Tientietnikov’s estate was + not being worked as it might have been—that much neglect and + listlessness and pilfering and drunkenness was abroad; and on perceiving + this, he thought to himself: “What a fool is that Tientietnikov! To think + of letting a property like this decay when he might be drawing from it an + income of fifty thousand roubles a year!” + </p> + <p> + Also, more than once, while taking these walks, our hero pondered the idea + of himself becoming a landowner—not now, of course, but later, when + his chief aim should have been achieved, and he had got into his hands the + necessary means for living the quiet life of the proprietor of an estate. + Yes, and at these times there would include itself in his castle-building + the figure of a young, fresh, fair-faced maiden of the mercantile or other + rich grade of society, a woman who could both play and sing. He also + dreamed of little descendants who should perpetuate the name of Chichikov; + perhaps a frolicsome little boy and a fair young daughter, or possibly, + two boys and quite two or three daughters; so that all should know that he + had really lived and had his being, that he had not merely roamed the + world like a spectre or a shadow; so that for him and his the country + should never be put to shame. And from that he would go on to fancy that a + title appended to his rank would not be a bad thing—the title of + State Councillor, for instance, which was deserving of all honour and + respect. Ah, it is a common thing for a man who is taking a solitary walk + so to detach himself from the irksome realities of the present that he is + able to stir and to excite and to provoke his imagination to the + conception of things he knows can never really come to pass! + </p> + <p> + Chichikov’s servants also found the mansion to their taste, and, like + their master, speedily made themselves at home in it. In particular did + Petrushka make friends with Grigory the butler, although at first the pair + showed a tendency to outbrag one another—Petrushka beginning by + throwing dust in Grigory’s eyes on the score of his (Petrushka’s) travels, + and Grigory taking him down a peg or two by referring to St. Petersburg (a + city which Petrushka had never visited), and Petrushka seeking to recover + lost ground by dilating on towns which he HAD visited, and Grigory capping + this by naming some town which is not to be found on any map in existence, + and then estimating the journey thither as at least thirty thousand versts—a + statement which would so completely flabbergast the henchman of + Chichikov’s suite that he would be left staring open-mouthed, amid the + general laughter of the domestic staff. However, as I say, the pair ended + by swearing eternal friendship with one another, and making a practice of + resorting to the village tavern in company. + </p> + <p> + For Selifan, however, the place had a charm of a different kind. That is + to say, each evening there would take place in the village a singing of + songs and a weaving of country dances; and so shapely and buxom were the + maidens—maidens of a type hard to find in our present-day villages + on large estates—that he would stand for hours wondering which of + them was the best. White-necked and white-bosomed, all had great roving + eyes, the gait of peacocks, and hair reaching to the waist. And as, with + his hands clasping theirs, he glided hither and thither in the dance, or + retired backwards towards a wall with a row of other young fellows, and + then, with them, returned to meet the damsels—all singing in chorus + (and laughing as they sang it), “Boyars, show me my bridegroom!” and dusk + was falling gently, and from the other side of the river there kept coming + far, faint, plaintive echoes of the melody—well, then our Selifan + hardly knew whether he were standing upon his head or his heels. Later, + when sleeping and when waking, both at noon and at twilight, he would seem + still to be holding a pair of white hands, and moving in the dance. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov’s horses also found nothing of which to disapprove. Yes, both + the bay, the Assessor, and the skewbald accounted residence at + Tientietnikov’s a most comfortable affair, and voted the oats excellent, + and the arrangement of the stables beyond all cavil. True, on this + occasion each horse had a stall to himself; yet, by looking over the + intervening partition, it was possible always to see one’s fellows, and, + should a neighbour take it into his head to utter a neigh, to answer it at + once. + </p> + <p> + As for the errand which had hitherto led Chichikov to travel about Russia, + he had now decided to move very cautiously and secretly in the matter. In + fact, on noticing that Tientietnikov went in absorbedly for reading and + for talking philosophy, the visitor said to himself, “No—I had + better begin at the other end,” and proceeded first to feel his way among + the servants of the establishment. From them he learnt several things, + and, in particular, that the barin had been wont to go and call upon a + certain General in the neighbourhood, and that the General possessed a + daughter, and that she and Tientietnikov had had an affair of some sort, + but that the pair had subsequently parted, and gone their several ways. + For that matter, Chichikov himself had noticed that Tientietnikov was in + the habit of drawing heads of which each representation exactly resembled + the rest. + </p> + <p> + Once, as he sat tapping his silver snuff-box after luncheon, Chichikov + remarked: + </p> + <p> + “One thing you lack, and only one, Andrei Ivanovitch.” + </p> + <p> + “What is that?” asked his host. + </p> + <p> + “A female friend or two,” replied Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + Tientietnikov made no rejoinder, and the conversation came temporarily to + an end. + </p> + <p> + But Chichikov was not to be discouraged; wherefore, while waiting for + supper and talking on different subjects, he seized an opportunity to + interject: + </p> + <p> + “Do you know, it would do you no harm to marry.” + </p> + <p> + As before, Tientietnikov did not reply, and the renewed mention of the + subject seemed to have annoyed him. + </p> + <p> + For the third time—it was after supper—Chichikov returned to + the charge by remarking: + </p> + <p> + “To-day, as I was walking round your property, I could not help thinking + that marriage would do you a great deal of good. Otherwise you will + develop into a hypochondriac.” + </p> + <p> + Whether Chichikov’s words now voiced sufficiently the note of persuasion, + or whether Tientietnikov happened, at the moment, to be unusually disposed + to frankness, at all events the young landowner sighed, and then responded + as he expelled a puff of tobacco smoke: + </p> + <p> + “To attain anything, Paul Ivanovitch, one needs to have been born under a + lucky star.” + </p> + <p> + And he related to his guest the whole history of his acquaintanceship and + subsequent rupture with the General. + </p> + <p> + As Chichikov listened to the recital, and gradually realised that the + affair had arisen merely out of a chance word on the General’s part, he + was astounded beyond measure, and gazed at Tientietnikov without knowing + what to make of him. + </p> + <p> + “Andrei Ivanovitch,” he said at length, “what was there to take offence + at?” + </p> + <p> + “Nothing, as regards the actual words spoken,” replied the other. “The + offence lay, rather, in the insult conveyed in the General’s tone.” + Tientietnikov was a kindly and peaceable man, yet his eyes flashed as he + said this, and his voice vibrated with wounded feeling. + </p> + <p> + “Yet, even then, need you have taken it so much amiss?” + </p> + <p> + “What? Could I have gone on visiting him as before?” + </p> + <p> + “Certainly. No great harm had been done?” + </p> + <p> + “I disagree with you. Had he been an old man in a humble station of life, + instead of a proud and swaggering officer, I should not have minded so + much. But, as it was, I could not, and would not, brook his words.” + </p> + <p> + “A curious fellow, this Tientietnikov!” thought Chichikov to himself. + </p> + <p> + “A curious fellow, this Chichikov!” was Tientietnikov’s inward reflection. + </p> + <p> + “I tell you what,” resumed Chichikov. “To-morrow I myself will go and see + the General.” + </p> + <p> + “To what purpose?” asked Tientietnikov, with astonishment and distrust in + his eyes. + </p> + <p> + “To offer him an assurance of my personal respect.” + </p> + <p> + “A strange fellow, this Chichikov!” reflected Tientietnikov. + </p> + <p> + “A strange fellow, this Tientietnikov!” thought Chichikov, and then added + aloud: “Yes, I will go and see him at ten o’clock to-morrow; but since my + britchka is not yet altogether in travelling order, would you be so good + as to lend me your koliaska for the purpose?” + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0013"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER II + </h3> + <p> + Tientietnikov’s good horses covered the ten versts to the General’s house + in a little over half an hour. Descending from the koliaska with features + attuned to deference, Chichikov inquired for the master of the house, and + was at once ushered into his presence. Bowing with head held respectfully + on one side and hands extended like those of a waiter carrying a trayful + of teacups, the visitor inclined his whole body forward, and said: + </p> + <p> + “I have deemed it my duty to present myself to your Excellency. I have + deemed it my duty because in my heart I cherish a most profound respect + for the valiant men who, on the field of battle, have proved the saviours + of their country.” + </p> + <p> + That this preliminary attack did not wholly displease the General was + proved by the fact that, responding with a gracious inclination of the + head, he replied: + </p> + <p> + “I am glad to make your acquaintance. Pray be so good as to take a seat. + In what capacity or capacities have you yourself seen service?” + </p> + <p> + “Of my service,” said Chichikov, depositing his form, not exactly in the + centre of the chair, but rather on one side of it, and resting a hand upon + one of its arms, “—of my service the scene was laid, in the first + instance, in the Treasury; while its further course bore me successively + into the employ of the Public Buildings Commission, of the Customs Board, + and of other Government Offices. But, throughout, my life has resembled a + barque tossed on the crests of perfidious billows. In suffering I have + been swathed and wrapped until I have come to be, as it were, suffering + personified; while of the extent to which my life has been sought by foes, + no words, no colouring, no (if I may so express it?) painter’s brush could + ever convey to you an adequate idea. And now, at length, in my declining + years, I am seeking a corner in which to eke out the remainder of my + miserable existence, while at the present moment I am enjoying the + hospitality of a neighbour of your acquaintance.” + </p> + <p> + “And who is that?” + </p> + <p> + “Your neighbour Tientietnikov, your Excellency.” + </p> + <p> + Upon that the General frowned. + </p> + <p> + “Led me add,” put in Chichikov hastily, “that he greatly regrets that on a + former occasion he should have failed to show a proper respect for—for—” + </p> + <p> + “For what?” asked the General. + </p> + <p> + “For the services to the public which your Excellency has rendered. + Indeed, he cannot find words to express his sorrow, but keeps repeating to + himself: ‘Would that I had valued at their true worth the men who have + saved our fatherland!’” + </p> + <p> + “And why should he say that?” asked the mollified General. “I bear him no + grudge. In fact, I have never cherished aught but a sincere liking for + him, a sincere esteem, and do not doubt but that, in time, he may become a + useful member of society.” + </p> + <p> + “In the words which you have been good enough to utter,” said Chichikov + with a bow, “there is embodied much justice. Yes, Tientietnikov is in very + truth a man of worth. Not only does he possess the gift of eloquence, but + also he is a master of the pen.” + </p> + <p> + “Ah, yes; he DOES write rubbish of some sort, doesn’t he? Verses, or + something of the kind?” + </p> + <p> + “Not rubbish, your Excellency, but practical stuff. In short, he is + inditing a history.” + </p> + <p> + “A HISTORY? But a history of what?” + </p> + <p> + “A history of, of—” For a moment or two Chichikov hesitated. Then, + whether because it was a General that was seated in front of him, or + because he desired to impart greater importance to the subject which he + was about to invent, he concluded: “A history of Generals, your + Excellency.” + </p> + <p> + “Of Generals? Of WHAT Generals?” + </p> + <p> + “Of Generals generally—of Generals at large. That is to say, and to + be more precise, a history of the Generals of our fatherland.” + </p> + <p> + By this time Chichikov was floundering badly. Mentally he spat upon + himself and reflected: “Gracious heavens! What rubbish I am talking!” + </p> + <p> + “Pardon me,” went on his interlocutor, “but I do not quite understand you. + Is Tientietnikov producing a history of a given period, or only a history + made up of a series of biographies? Also, is he including ALL our + Generals, or only those who took part in the campaign of 1812?” + </p> + <p> + “The latter, your Excellency—only the Generals of 1812,” replied + Chichikov. Then he added beneath his breath: “Were I to be killed for it, + I could not say what that may be supposed to mean.” + </p> + <p> + “Then why should he not come and see me in person?” went on his host. + “Possibly I might be able to furnish him with much interesting material?” + </p> + <p> + “He is afraid to come, your Excellency.” + </p> + <p> + “Nonsense! Just because of a hasty word or two! I am not that sort of man + at all. In fact, I should be very happy to call upon HIM.” + </p> + <p> + “Never would he permit that, your Excellency. He would greatly prefer to + be the first to make advances.” And Chichikov added to himself: “What a + stroke of luck those Generals were! Otherwise, the Lord knows where my + tongue might have landed me!” + </p> + <p> + At this moment the door into the adjoining room opened, and there appeared + in the doorway a girl as fair as a ray of the sun—so fair, indeed, + that Chichikov stared at her in amazement. Apparently she had come to + speak to her father for a moment, but had stopped short on perceiving that + there was some one with him. The only fault to be found in her appearance + was the fact that she was too thin and fragile-looking. + </p> + <p> + “May I introduce you to my little pet?” said the General to Chichikov. “To + tell you the truth, I do not know your name.” + </p> + <p> + “That you should be unacquainted with the name of one who has never + distinguished himself in the manner of which you yourself can boast is + scarcely to be wondered at.” And Chichikov executed one of his sidelong, + deferential bows. + </p> + <p> + “Well, I should be delighted to know it.” + </p> + <p> + “It is Paul Ivanovitch Chichikov, your Excellency.” With that went the + easy bow of a military man and the agile backward movement of an + india-rubber ball. + </p> + <p> + “Ulinka, this is Paul Ivanovitch,” said the General, turning to his + daughter. “He has just told me some interesting news—namely, that + our neighbour Tientietnikov is not altogether the fool we had at first + thought him. On the contrary, he is engaged upon a very important work—upon + a history of the Russian Generals of 1812.” + </p> + <p> + “But who ever supposed him to be a fool?” asked the girl quickly. “What + happened was that you took Vishnepokromov’s word—the word of a man + who is himself both a fool and a good-for-nothing.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, well,” said the father after further good-natured dispute on the + subject of Vishnepokromov. “Do you now run away, for I wish to dress for + luncheon. And you, sir,” he added to Chichikov, “will you not join us at + table?” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov bowed so low and so long that, by the time that his eyes had + ceased to see nothing but his own boots, the General’s daughter had + disappeared, and in her place was standing a bewhiskered butler, armed + with a silver soap-dish and a hand-basin. + </p> + <p> + “Do you mind if I wash in your presence?” asked the host. + </p> + <p> + “By no means,” replied Chichikov. “Pray do whatsoever you please in that + respect.” + </p> + <p> + Upon that the General fell to scrubbing himself—incidentally, to + sending soapsuds flying in every direction. Meanwhile he seemed so + favourably disposed that Chichikov decided to sound him then and there, + more especially since the butler had left the room. + </p> + <p> + “May I put to you a problem?” he asked. + </p> + <p> + “Certainly,” replied the General. “What is it?” + </p> + <p> + “It is this, your Excellency. I have a decrepit old uncle who owns three + hundred souls and two thousand roubles-worth of other property. Also, + except for myself, he possesses not a single heir. Now, although his + infirm state of health will not permit of his managing his property in + person, he will not allow me either to manage it. And the reason for his + conduct—his very strange conduct—he states as follows: ‘I do + not know my nephew, and very likely he is a spendthrift. If he wishes to + show me that he is good for anything, let him go and acquire as many souls + as <i>I</i> have acquired; and when he has done that I will transfer to + him my three hundred souls as well.” + </p> + <p> + “The man must be an absolute fool,” commented the General. + </p> + <p> + “Possibly. And were that all, things would not be as bad as they are. But, + unfortunately, my uncle has gone and taken up with his housekeeper, and + has had children by her. Consequently, everything will now pass to THEM.” + </p> + <p> + “The old man must have taken leave of his senses,” remarked the General. + “Yet how <i>I</i> can help you I fail to see.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, I have thought of a plan. If you will hand me over all the dead + souls on your estate—hand them over to me exactly as though they + were still alive, and were purchasable property—I will offer them to + the old man, and then he will leave me his fortune.” + </p> + <p> + At this point the General burst into a roar of laughter such as few can + ever have heard. Half-dressed, he subsided into a chair, threw back his + head, and guffawed until he came near to choking. In fact, the house shook + with his merriment, so much so that the butler and his daughter came + running into the room in alarm. + </p> + <p> + It was long before he could produce a single articulate word; and even + when he did so (to reassure his daughter and the butler) he kept + momentarily relapsing into spluttering chuckles which made the house ring + and ring again. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov was greatly taken aback. + </p> + <p> + “Oh, that uncle!” bellowed the General in paroxysms of mirth. “Oh, that + blessed uncle! WHAT a fool he’ll look! Ha, ha, ha! Dead souls offered him + instead of live ones! Oh, my goodness!” + </p> + <p> + “I suppose I’ve put my foot in it again,” ruefully reflected Chichikov. + “But, good Lord, what a man the fellow is to laugh! Heaven send that he + doesn’t burst of it!” + </p> + <p> + “Ha, ha, ha!” broke out the General afresh. “WHAT a donkey the old man + must be! To think of his saying to you: ‘You go and fit yourself out with + three hundred souls, and I’ll cap them with my own lot’! My word! What a + jackass!” + </p> + <p> + “A jackass, your Excellency?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, indeed! And to think of the jest of putting him off with dead souls! + Ha, ha, ha! WHAT wouldn’t I give to see you handing him the title deeds? + Who is he? What is he like? Is he very old?” + </p> + <p> + “He is eighty, your Excellency.” + </p> + <p> + “But still brisk and able to move about, eh? Surely he must be pretty + strong to go on living with his housekeeper like that?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes. But what does such strength mean? Sand runs away, your Excellency.” + </p> + <p> + “The old fool! But is he really such a fool?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, your Excellency.” + </p> + <p> + “And does he go out at all? Does he see company? Can he still hold himself + upright?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but with great difficulty.” + </p> + <p> + “And has he any teeth left?” + </p> + <p> + “No more than two at the most.” + </p> + <p> + “The old jackass! Don’t be angry with me, but I must say that, though your + uncle, he is also a jackass.” + </p> + <p> + “Quite so, your Excellency. And though it grieves ME to have to confess + that he is my uncle, what am I to do with him?” + </p> + <p> + Yet this was not altogether the truth. What would have been a far harder + thing for Chichikov to have confessed was the fact that he possessed no + uncles at all. + </p> + <p> + “I beg of you, your Excellency,” he went on, “to hand me over those, those—” + </p> + <p> + “Those dead souls, eh? Why, in return for the jest I will give you some + land as well. Yes, you can take the whole graveyard if you like. Ha, ha, + ha! The old man! Ha, ha, ha! WHAT a fool he’ll look! Ha, ha, ha!” + </p> + <p> + And once more the General’s guffaws went ringing through the house. + </p> +<p class="center p2"> + [At this point there is a long hiatus in the original.] +</p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0014"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER III + </h3> + <p> + “If Colonel Koshkarev should turn out to be as mad as the last one it is a + bad look-out,” said Chichikov to himself on opening his eyes amid fields + and open country—everything else having disappeared save the vault + of heaven and a couple of low-lying clouds. + </p> + <p> + “Selifan,” he went on, “did you ask how to get to Colonel Koshkarev’s?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, Paul Ivanovitch. At least, there was such a clatter around the + koliaska that I could not; but Petrushka asked the coachman.” + </p> + <p> + “You fool! How often have I told you not to rely on Petrushka? Petrushka + is a blockhead, an idiot. Besides, at the present moment I believe him to + be drunk.” + </p> + <p> + “No, you are wrong, barin,” put in the person referred to, turning his + head with a sidelong glance. “After we get down the next hill we shall + need but to keep bending round it. That is all.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, and I suppose you’ll tell me that sivnkha is the only thing that has + passed your lips? Well, the view at least is beautiful. In fact, when one + has seen this place one may say that one has seen one of the beauty spots + of Europe.” This said, Chichikov added to himself, smoothing his chin: + “What a difference between the features of a civilised man of the world + and those of a common lacquey!” + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile the koliaska quickened its pace, and Chichikov once more caught + sight of Tientietnikov’s aspen-studded meadows. Undulating gently on + elastic springs, the vehicle cautiously descended the steep incline, and + then proceeded past water-mills, rumbled over a bridge or two, and jolted + easily along the rough-set road which traversed the flats. Not a molehill, + not a mound jarred the spine. The vehicle was comfort itself. + </p> + <p> + Swiftly there flew by clumps of osiers, slender elder trees, and + silver-leaved poplars, their branches brushing against Selifan and + Petrushka, and at intervals depriving the valet of his cap. Each time that + this happened, the sullen-faced servitor fell to cursing both the tree + responsible for the occurrence and the landowner responsible for the tree + being in existence; yet nothing would induce him thereafter either to tie + on the cap or to steady it with his hand, so complete was his assurance + that the accident would never be repeated. Soon to the foregoing trees + there became added an occasional birch or spruce fir, while in the dense + undergrowth around their roots could be seen the blue iris and the yellow + wood-tulip. Gradually the forest grew darker, as though eventually the + obscurity would become complete. Then through the trunks and the boughs + there began to gleam points of light like glittering mirrors, and as the + number of trees lessened, these points grew larger, until the travellers + debouched upon the shore of a lake four versts or so in circumference, and + having on its further margin the grey, scattered log huts of a peasant + village. In the water a great commotion was in progress. In the first + place, some twenty men, immersed to the knee, to the breast, or to the + neck, were dragging a large fishing-net inshore, while, in the second + place, there was entangled in the same, in addition to some fish, a stout + man shaped precisely like a melon or a hogshead. Greatly excited, he was + shouting at the top of his voice: “Let Kosma manage it, you lout of a + Denis! Kosma, take the end of the rope from Denis! Don’t bear so hard on + it, Thoma Bolshoy <a href="#linknote-41" id="linknoteref-41"><small>41</small></a>! Go where + Thoma Menshov <a href="#linknote-42" id="linknoteref-42"><small>42</small></a> + is! Damn it, bring the net to land, will you!” From this it became clear + that it was not on his own account that the stout man was worrying. + Indeed, he had no need to do so, since his fat would in any case have + prevented him from sinking. Yes, even if he had turned head over heels in + an effort to dive, the water would persistently have borne him up; and the + same if, say, a couple of men had jumped on his back—the only result + would have been that he would have become a trifle deeper submerged, and + forced to draw breath by spouting bubbles through his nose. No, the cause + of his agitation was lest the net should break, and the fish escape: + wherefore he was urging some additional peasants who were standing on the + bank to lay hold of and to pull at, an extra rope or two. + </p> + <p> + “That must be the barin—Colonel Koshkarev,” said Selifan. + </p> + <p> + “Why?” asked Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Because, if you please, his skin is whiter than the rest, and he has the + respectable paunch of a gentleman.” + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile good progress was being made with the hauling in of the barin; + until, feeling the ground with his feet, he rose to an upright position, + and at the same moment caught sight of the koliaska, with Chichikov seated + therein, descending the declivity. + </p> + <p> + “Have you dined yet?” shouted the barin as, still entangled in the net, he + approached the shore with a huge fish on his back. With one hand shading + his eyes from the sun, and the other thrown backwards, he looked, in point + of pose, like the Medici Venus emerging from her bath. + </p> + <p> + “No,” replied Chichikov, raising his cap, and executing a series of bows. + </p> + <p> + “Then thank God for that,” rejoined the gentleman. + </p> + <p> + “Why?” asked Chichikov with no little curiosity, and still holding his cap + over his head. + </p> + <p> + “Because of THIS. Cast off the net, Thoma Menshov, and pick up that + sturgeon for the gentleman to see. Go and help him, Telepen Kuzma.” + </p> + <p> + With that the peasants indicated picked up by the head what was a + veritable monster of a fish. + </p> + <p> + “Isn’t it a beauty—a sturgeon fresh run from the river?” exclaimed + the stout barin. “And now let us be off home. Coachman, you can take the + lower road through the kitchen garden. Run, you lout of a Thoma Bolshoy, + and open the gate for him. He will guide you to the house, and I myself + shall be along presently.” + </p> + <p> + Thereupon the barelegged Thoma Bolshoy, clad in nothing but a shirt, ran + ahead of the koliaska through the village, every hut of which had hanging + in front of it a variety of nets, for the reason that every inhabitant of + the place was a fisherman. Next, he opened a gate into a large vegetable + enclosure, and thence the koliaska emerged into a square near a wooden + church, with, showing beyond the latter, the roofs of the manorial + homestead. + </p> + <p> + “A queer fellow, that Koshkarev!” said Chichikov to himself. + </p> + <p> + “Well, whatever I may be, at least I’m here,” said a voice by his side. + Chichikov looked round, and perceived that, in the meanwhile, the barin + had dressed himself and overtaken the carriage. With a pair of yellow + trousers he was wearing a grass-green jacket, and his neck was as + guiltless of a collar as Cupid’s. Also, as he sat sideways in his drozhki, + his bulk was such that he completely filled the vehicle. Chichikov was + about to make some remark or another when the stout gentleman disappeared; + and presently his drozhki re-emerged into view at the spot where the fish + had been drawn to land, and his voice could be heard reiterating + exhortations to his serfs. Yet when Chichikov reached the verandah of the + house he found, to his intense surprise, the stout gentleman waiting to + welcome the visitor. How he had contrived to convey himself thither passed + Chichikov’s comprehension. Host and guest embraced three times, according + to a bygone custom of Russia. Evidently the barin was one of the old + school. + </p> + <p> + “I bring you,” said Chichikov, “a greeting from his Excellency.” + </p> + <p> + “From whom?” + </p> + <p> + “From your relative General Alexander Dmitrievitch.” + </p> + <p> + “Who is Alexander Dmitrievitch?” + </p> + <p> + “What? You do not know General Alexander Dmitrievitch Betrishev?” + exclaimed Chichikov with a touch of surprise. + </p> + <p> + “No, I do not,” replied the gentleman. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov’s surprise grew to absolute astonishment. + </p> + <p> + “How comes that about?” he ejaculated. “I hope that I have the honour of + addressing Colonel Koshkarev?” + </p> + <p> + “Your hopes are vain. It is to my house, not to his, that you have come; + and I am Peter Petrovitch Pietukh—yes, Peter Petrovitch Pietukh.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov, dumbfounded, turned to Selifan and Petrushka. + </p> + <p> + “What do you mean?” he exclaimed. “I told you to drive to the house of + Colonel Koshkarev, whereas you have brought me to that of Peter Petrovitch + Pietukh.” + </p> + <p> + “All the same, your fellows have done quite right,” put in the gentleman + referred to. “Do you” (this to Selifan and Petrushka) “go to the kitchen, + where they will give you a glassful of vodka apiece. Then put up the + horses, and be off to the servants’ quarters.” + </p> + <p> + “I regret the mistake extremely,” said Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “But it is not a mistake. When you have tried the dinner which I have in + store for you, just see whether you think IT a mistake. Enter, I beg of + you.” And, taking Chichikov by the arm, the host conducted him within, + where they were met by a couple of youths. + </p> + <p> + “Let me introduce my two sons, home for their holidays from the Gymnasium + <a href="#linknote-43" id="linknoteref-43"><small>43</small></a>,” + said Pietukh. “Nikolasha, come and entertain our good visitor, while you, + Aleksasha, follow me.” And with that the host disappeared. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov turned to Nikolasha, whom he found to be a budding man about + town, since at first he opened a conversation by stating that, as no good + was to be derived from studying at a provincial institution, he and his + brother desired to remove, rather, to St. Petersburg, the provinces not + being worth living in. + </p> + <p> + “I quite understand,” Chichikov thought to himself. “The end of the + chapter will be confectioners’ assistants and the boulevards.” + </p> + <p> + “Tell me,” he added aloud, “how does your father’s property at present + stand?” + </p> + <p> + “It is all mortgaged,” put in the father himself as he re-entered the + room. “Yes, it is all mortgaged, every bit of it.” + </p> + <p> + “What a pity!” thought Chichikov. “At this rate it will not be long before + this man has no property at all left. I must hurry my departure.” Aloud he + said with an air of sympathy: “That you have mortgaged the estate seems to + me a matter of regret.” + </p> + <p> + “No, not at all,” replied Pietukh. “In fact, they tell me that it is a + good thing to do, and that every one else is doing it. Why should I act + differently from my neighbours? Moreover, I have had enough of living + here, and should like to try Moscow—more especially since my sons + are always begging me to give them a metropolitan education.” + </p> + <p> + “Oh, the fool, the fool!” reflected Chichikov. “He is for throwing up + everything and making spendthrifts of his sons. Yet this is a nice + property, and it is clear that the local peasants are doing well, and that + the family, too, is comfortably off. On the other hand, as soon as ever + these lads begin their education in restaurants and theatres, the devil + will away with every stick of their substance. For my own part, I could + desire nothing better than this quiet life in the country.” + </p> + <p> + “Let me guess what is in your mind,” said Pietukh. + </p> + <p> + “What, then?” asked Chichikov, rather taken aback. + </p> + <p> + “You are thinking to yourself: ‘That fool of a Pietukh has asked me to + dinner, yet not a bite of dinner do I see.’ But wait a little. It will be + ready presently, for it is being cooked as fast as a maiden who has had + her hair cut off plaits herself a new set of tresses.” + </p> + <p> + “Here comes Platon Mikhalitch, father!” exclaimed Aleksasha, who had been + peeping out of the window. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, and on a grey horse,” added his brother. + </p> + <p> + “Who is Platon Mikhalitch?” inquired Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “A neighbour of ours, and an excellent fellow.” + </p> + <p> + The next moment Platon Mikhalitch himself entered the room, accompanied by + a sporting dog named Yarb. He was a tall, handsome man, with extremely red + hair. As for his companion, it was of the keen-muzzled species used for + shooting. + </p> + <p> + “Have you dined yet?” asked the host. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” replied Platon. + </p> + <p> + “Indeed? What do you mean by coming here to laugh at us all? Do I ever go + to YOUR place after dinner?” + </p> + <p> + The newcomer smiled. “Well, if it can bring you any comfort,” he said, + “let me tell you that I ate nothing at the meal, for I had no appetite.” + </p> + <p> + “But you should see what I have caught—what sort of a sturgeon fate + has brought my way! Yes, and what crucians and carp!” + </p> + <p> + “Really it tires one to hear you. How come you always to be so cheerful?” + </p> + <p> + “And how come YOU always to be so gloomy?” retorted the host. + </p> + <p> + “How, you ask? Simply because I am so.” + </p> + <p> + “The truth is you don’t eat enough. Try the plan of making a good dinner. + Weariness of everything is a modern invention. Once upon a time one never + heard of it.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, boast away, but have you yourself never been tired of things?” + </p> + <p> + “Never in my life. I do not so much as know whether I should find time to + be tired. In the morning, when one awakes, the cook is waiting, and the + dinner has to be ordered. Then one drinks one’s morning tea, and then the + bailiff arrives for HIS orders, and then there is fishing to be done, and + then one’s dinner has to be eaten. Next, before one has even had a chance + to utter a snore, there enters once again the cook, and one has to order + supper; and when she has departed, behold, back she comes with a request + for the following day’s dinner! What time does THAT leave one to be weary + of things?” + </p> + <p> + Throughout this conversation, Chichikov had been taking stock of the + newcomer, who astonished him with his good looks, his upright, picturesque + figure, his appearance of fresh, unwasted youthfulness, and the boyish + purity, innocence, and clarity of his features. Neither passion nor care + nor aught of the nature of agitation or anxiety of mind had ventured to + touch his unsullied face, or to lay a single wrinkle thereon. Yet the + touch of life which those emotions might have imparted was wanting. The + face was, as it were, dreaming, even though from time to time an ironical + smile disturbed it. + </p> + <p> + “I, too, cannot understand,” remarked Chichikov, “how a man of your + appearance can find things wearisome. Of course, if a man is hard pressed + for money, or if he has enemies who are lying in wait for his life (as + have certain folk of whom I know), well, then—” + </p> + <p> + “Believe me when I say,” interrupted the handsome guest, “that, for the + sake of a diversion, I should be glad of ANY sort of an anxiety. Would + that some enemy would conceive a grudge against me! But no one does so. + Everything remains eternally dull.” + </p> + <p> + “But perhaps you lack a sufficiency of land or souls?” + </p> + <p> + “Not at all. I and my brother own ten thousand desiatins <a + href="#linknote-44" id="linknoteref-44"><small>44</small></a> + of land, and over a thousand souls.” + </p> + <p> + “Curious! I do not understand it. But perhaps the harvest has failed, or + you have sickness about, and many of your male peasants have died of it?” + </p> + <p> + “On the contrary, everything is in splendid order, for my brother is the + best of managers.” + </p> + <p> + “Then to find things wearisome!” exclaimed Chichikov. “It passes my + comprehension.” And he shrugged his shoulders. + </p> + <p> + “Well, we will soon put weariness to flight,” interrupted the host. + “Aleksasha, do you run helter-skelter to the kitchen, and there tell the + cook to serve the fish pasties. Yes, and where have that gawk of an + Emelian and that thief of an Antoshka got to? Why have they not handed + round the zakuski?” + </p> + <p> + At this moment the door opened, and the “gawk” and the “thief” in question + made their appearance with napkins and a tray—the latter bearing six + decanters of variously-coloured beverages. These they placed upon the + table, and then ringed them about with glasses and platefuls of every + conceivable kind of appetiser. That done, the servants applied themselves + to bringing in various comestibles under covers, through which could be + heard the hissing of hot roast viands. In particular did the “gawk” and + the “thief” work hard at their tasks. As a matter of fact, their + appellations had been given them merely to spur them to greater activity, + for, in general, the barin was no lover of abuse, but, rather, a + kind-hearted man who, like most Russians, could not get on without a sharp + word or two. That is to say, he needed them for his tongue as he need a + glass of vodka for his digestion. What else could you expect? It was his + nature to care for nothing mild. + </p> + <p> + To the zakuski succeeded the meal itself, and the host became a perfect + glutton on his guests’ behalf. Should he notice that a guest had taken but + a single piece of a comestible, he added thereto another one, saying: + “Without a mate, neither man nor bird can live in this world.” Should any + one take two pieces, he added thereto a third, saying: “What is the good + of the number 2? God loves a trinity.” Should any one take three pieces, + he would say: “Where do you see a waggon with three wheels? Who builds a + three-cornered hut?” Lastly, should any one take four pieces, he would cap + them with a fifth, and add thereto the punning quip, “Na piat opiat <a + href="#linknote-45" id="linknoteref-45"><small>45</small></a>”. + After devouring at least twelve steaks of sturgeon, Chichikov ventured to + think to himself, “My host cannot possibly add to THEM,” but found that he + was mistaken, for, without a word, Pietukh heaped upon his plate an + enormous portion of spit-roasted veal, and also some kidneys. And what + veal it was! + </p> + <p> + “That calf was fed two years on milk,” he explained. “I cared for it like + my own son.” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless I can eat no more,” said Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Do you try the veal before you say that you can eat no more.” + </p> + <p> + “But I could not get it down my throat. There is no room left.” + </p> + <p> + “If there be no room in a church for a newcomer, the beadle is sent for, + and room is very soon made—yes, even though before there was such a + crush that an apple couldn’t have been dropped between the people. Do you + try the veal, I say. That piece is the titbit of all.” + </p> + <p> + So Chichikov made the attempt; and in very truth the veal was beyond all + praise, and room was found for it, even though one would have supposed the + feat impossible. + </p> + <p> + “Fancy this good fellow removing to St. Petersburg or Moscow!” said the + guest to himself. “Why, with a scale of living like this, he would be + ruined in three years.” For that matter, Pietukh might well have been + ruined already, for hospitality can dissipate a fortune in three months as + easily as it can in three years. + </p> + <p> + The host also dispensed the wine with a lavish hand, and what the guests + did not drink he gave to his sons, who thus swallowed glass after glass. + Indeed, even before coming to table, it was possible to discern to what + department of human accomplishment their bent was turned. When the meal + was over, however, the guests had no mind for further drinking. Indeed, it + was all that they could do to drag themselves on to the balcony, and there + to relapse into easy chairs. Indeed, the moment that the host subsided + into his seat—it was large enough for four—he fell asleep, and + his portly presence, converting itself into a sort of blacksmith’s + bellows, started to vent, through open mouth and distended nostrils, such + sounds as can have greeted the reader’s ear but seldom—sounds as of + a drum being beaten in combination with the whistling of a flute and the + strident howling of a dog. + </p> + <p> + “Listen to him!” said Platon. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov smiled. + </p> + <p> + “Naturally, on such dinners as that,” continued the other, “our host does + NOT find the time dull. And as soon as dinner is ended there can ensue + sleep.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but, pardon me, I still fail to understand why you should find life + wearisome. There are so many resources against ennui!” + </p> + <p> + “As for instance?” + </p> + <p> + “For a young man, dancing, the playing of one or another musical + instrument, and—well, yes, marriage.” + </p> + <p> + “Marriage to whom?” + </p> + <p> + “To some maiden who is both charming and rich. Are there none in these + parts?” + </p> + <p> + “No.” + </p> + <p> + “Then, were I you, I should travel, and seek a maiden elsewhere.” And a + brilliant idea therewith entered Chichikov’s head. “This last resource,” + he added, “is the best of all resources against ennui.” + </p> + <p> + “What resource are you speaking of?” + </p> + <p> + “Of travel.” + </p> + <p> + “But whither?” + </p> + <p> + “Well, should it so please you, you might join me as my companion.” This + said, the speaker added to himself as he eyed Platon: “Yes, that would + suit me exactly, for then I should have half my expenses paid, and could + charge him also with the cost of mending the koliaska.” + </p> + <p> + “And whither should we go?” + </p> + <p> + “In that respect I am not wholly my own master, as I have business to do + for others as well as for myself. For instance, General Betristchev—an + intimate friend and, I might add, a generous benefactor of mine—has + charged me with commissions to certain of his relatives. However, though + relatives are relatives, I am travelling likewise on my own account, since + I wish to see the world and the whirligig of humanity—which, in + spite of what people may say, is as good as a living book or a second + education.” As a matter of fact, Chichikov was reflecting, “Yes, the plan + is an excellent one. I might even contrive that he should have to bear the + whole of our expenses, and that his horses should be used while my own + should be put out to graze on his farm.” + </p> + <p> + “Well, why should I not adopt the suggestion?” was Platon’s thought. + “There is nothing for me to do at home, since the management of the estate + is in my brother’s hands, and my going would cause him no inconvenience. + Yes, why should I not do as Chichikov has suggested?” + </p> + <p> + Then he added aloud: + </p> + <p> + “Would you come and stay with my brother for a couple of days? Otherwise + he might refuse me his consent.” + </p> + <p> + “With great pleasure,” said Chichikov. “Or even for three days.” + </p> + <p> + “Then here is my hand on it. Let us be off at once.” Platon seemed + suddenly to have come to life again. + </p> + <p> + “Where are you off to?” put in their host unexpectedly as he roused + himself and stared in astonishment at the pair. “No, no, my good sirs. I + have had the wheels removed from your koliaska, Monsieur Chichikov, and + have sent your horse, Platon Mikhalitch, to a grazing ground fifteen + versts away. Consequently you must spend the night here, and depart + to-morrow morning after breakfast.” + </p> + <p> + What could be done with a man like Pietukh? There was no help for it but + to remain. In return, the guests were rewarded with a beautiful spring + evening, for, to spend the time, the host organised a boating expedition + on the river, and a dozen rowers, with a dozen pairs of oars, conveyed the + party (to the accompaniment of song) across the smooth surface of the lake + and up a great river with towering banks. From time to time the boat would + pass under ropes, stretched across for purposes of fishing, and at each + turn of the rippling current new vistas unfolded themselves as tier upon + tier of woodland delighted the eye with a diversity of timber and foliage. + In unison did the rowers ply their sculls, yet it was though of itself + that the skiff shot forward, bird-like, over the glassy surface of the + water; while at intervals the broad-shouldered young oarsman who was + seated third from the bow would raise, as from a nightingale’s throat, the + opening staves of a boat song, and then be joined by five or six more, + until the melody had come to pour forth in a volume as free and boundless + as Russia herself. And Pietukh, too, would give himself a shake, and help + lustily to support the chorus; and even Chichikov felt acutely conscious + of the fact that he was a Russian. Only Platon reflected: “What is there + so splendid in these melancholy songs? They do but increase one’s + depression of spirits.” + </p> + <p> + The journey homeward was made in the gathering dusk. Rhythmically the oars + smote a surface which no longer reflected the sky, and darkness had fallen + when they reached the shore, along which lights were twinkling where the + fisherfolk were boiling live eels for soup. Everything had now wended its + way homeward for the night; the cattle and poultry had been housed, and + the herdsmen, standing at the gates of the village cattle-pens, amid the + trailing dust lately raised by their charges, were awaiting the milk-pails + and a summons to partake of the eel-broth. Through the dusk came the hum + of humankind, and the barking of dogs in other and more distant villages; + while, over all, the moon was rising, and the darkened countryside was + beginning to glimmer to light again under her beams. What a glorious + picture! Yet no one thought of admiring it. Instead of galloping over the + countryside on frisky cobs, Nikolasha and Aleksasha were engaged in + dreaming of Moscow, with its confectioners’ shops and the theatres of + which a cadet, newly arrived on a visit from the capital, had just been + telling them; while their father had his mind full of how best to stuff + his guests with yet more food, and Platon was given up to yawning. Only in + Chichikov was a spice of animation visible. “Yes,” he reflected, “some day + I, too, will become lord of such a country place.” And before his mind’s + eye there arose also a helpmeet and some little Chichikovs. + </p> + <p> + By the time that supper was finished the party had again over-eaten + themselves, and when Chichikov entered the room allotted him for the + night, he lay down upon the bed, and prodded his stomach. “It is as tight + as a drum,” he said to himself. “Not another titbit of veal could now get + into it.” Also, circumstances had so brought it about that next door to + him there was situated his host’s apartment; and since the intervening + wall was thin, Chichikov could hear every word that was said there. At the + present moment the master of the house was engaged in giving the cook + orders for what, under the guise of an early breakfast, promised to + constitute a veritable dinner. You should have heard Pietukh’s behests! + They would have excited the appetite of a corpse. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” he said, sucking his lips, and drawing a deep breath, “in the first + place, make a pasty in four divisions. Into one of the divisions put the + sturgeon’s cheeks and some viaziga <a href="#linknote-46" + id="linknoteref-46"><small>46</small></a>, and into + another division some buckwheat porridge, young mushrooms and onions, + sweet milk, calves’ brains, and anything else that you may find suitable—anything + else that you may have got handy. Also, bake the pastry to a nice brown on + one side, and but lightly on the other. Yes, and, as to the under side, + bake it so that it will be all juicy and flaky, so that it shall not + crumble into bits, but melt in the mouth like the softest snow that ever + you heard of.” And as he said this Pietukh fairly smacked his lips. + </p> + <p> + “The devil take him!” muttered Chichikov, thrusting his head beneath the + bedclothes to avoid hearing more. “The fellow won’t give one a chance to + sleep.” + </p> + <p> + Nevertheless he heard through the blankets: + </p> + <p> + “And garnish the sturgeon with beetroot, smelts, peppered mushrooms, young + radishes, carrots, beans, and anything else you like, so as to have plenty + of trimmings. Yes, and put a lump of ice into the pig’s bladder, so as to + swell it up.” + </p> + <p> + Many other dishes did Pietukh order, and nothing was to be heard but his + talk of boiling, roasting, and stewing. Finally, just as mention was being + made of a turkey cock, Chichikov fell asleep. + </p> + <p> + Next morning the guest’s state of repletion had reached the point of + Platon being unable to mount his horse; wherefore the latter was + dispatched homeward with one of Pietukh’s grooms, and the two guests + entered Chichikov’s koliaska. Even the dog trotted lazily in the rear; for + he, too, had over-eaten himself. + </p> + <p> + “It has been rather too much of a good thing,” remarked Chichikov as the + vehicle issued from the courtyard. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, and it vexes me to see the fellow never tire of it,” replied Platon. + </p> + <p> + “Ah,” thought Chichikov to himself, “if <i>I</i> had an income of seventy + thousand roubles, as you have, I’d very soon give tiredness one in the + eye! Take Murazov, the tax-farmer—he, again, must be worth ten + millions. What a fortune!” + </p> + <p> + “Do you mind where we drive?” asked Platon. “I should like first to go and + take leave of my sister and my brother-in-law.” + </p> + <p> + “With pleasure,” said Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “My brother-in-law is the leading landowner hereabouts. At the present + moment he is drawing an income of two hundred thousand roubles from a + property which, eight years ago, was producing a bare twenty thousand.” + </p> + <p> + “Truly a man worthy of the utmost respect! I shall be most interested to + make his acquaintance. To think of it! And what may his family name be?” + </p> + <p> + “Kostanzhoglo.” + </p> + <p> + “And his Christian name and patronymic?” + </p> + <p> + “Constantine Thedorovitch.” + </p> + <p> + “Constantine Thedorovitch Kostanzhoglo. Yes, it will be a most interesting + event to make his acquaintance. To know such a man must be a whole + education.” + </p> + <p> + Here Platon set himself to give Selifan some directions as to the way, a + necessary proceeding in view of the fact that Selifan could hardly + maintain his seat on the box. Twice Petrushka, too, had fallen headlong, + and this necessitated being tied to his perch with a piece of rope. “What + a clown!” had been Chichikov’s only comment. + </p> + <p> + “This is where my brother-in-law’s land begins,” said Platon. + </p> + <p> + “They give one a change of view.” + </p> + <p> + And, indeed, from this point the countryside became planted with timber; + the rows of trees running as straight as pistol-shots, and having beyond + them, and on higher ground, a second expanse of forest, newly planted like + the first; while beyond it, again, loomed a third plantation of older + trees. Next there succeeded a flat piece of the same nature. + </p> + <p> + “All this timber,” said Platon, “has grown up within eight or ten years at + the most; whereas on another man’s land it would have taken twenty to + attain the same growth.” + </p> + <p> + “And how has your brother-in-law effected this?” + </p> + <p> + “You must ask him yourself. He is so excellent a husbandman that nothing + ever fails with him. You see, he knows the soil, and also knows what ought + to be planted beside what, and what kinds of timber are the best + neighbourhood for grain. Again, everything on his estate is made to + perform at least three or four different functions. For instance, he makes + his timber not only serve as timber, but also serve as a provider of + moisture and shade to a given stretch of land, and then as a fertiliser + with its fallen leaves. Consequently, when everywhere else there is + drought, he still has water, and when everywhere else there has been a + failure of the harvest, on his lands it will have proved a success. But it + is a pity that I know so little about it all as to be unable to explain to + you his many expedients. Folk call him a wizard, for he produces so much. + Nevertheless, personally I find what he does uninteresting.” + </p> + <p> + “Truly an astonishing fellow!” reflected Chichikov with a glance at his + companion. “It is sad indeed to see a man so superficial as to be unable + to explain matters of this kind.” + </p> + <p> + At length the manor appeared in sight—an establishment looking + almost like a town, so numerous were the huts where they stood arranged in + three tiers, crowned with three churches, and surrounded with huge ricks + and barns. “Yes,” thought Chichikov to himself, “one can see what a jewel + of a landowner lives here.” The huts in question were stoutly built and + the intervening alleys well laid-out; while, wherever a waggon was + visible, it looked serviceable and more or less new. Also, the local + peasants bore an intelligent look on their faces, the cattle were of the + best possible breed, and even the peasants’ pigs belonged to the porcine + aristocracy. Clearly there dwelt here peasants who, to quote the song, + were accustomed to “pick up silver by the shovelful.” Nor were + Englishified gardens and parterres and other conceits in evidence, but, on + the contrary, there ran an open view from the manor house to the farm + buildings and the workmen’s cots, so that, after the old Russian fashion, + the barin should be able to keep an eye upon all that was going on around + him. For the same purpose, the mansion was topped with a tall lantern and + a superstructure—a device designed, not for ornament, nor for a + vantage-spot for the contemplation of the view, but for supervision of the + labourers engaged in distant fields. Lastly, the brisk, active servants + who received the visitors on the verandah were very different menials from + the drunken Petrushka, even though they did not wear swallow-tailed coats, + but only Cossack tchekmenu <a href="#linknote-47" id="linknoteref-47"><small>47</small></a> of blue homespun cloth. + </p> + <p> + The lady of the house also issued on to the verandah. With her face of the + freshness of “blood and milk” and the brightness of God’s daylight, she as + nearly resembled Platon as one pea resembles another, save that, whereas + he was languid, she was cheerful and full of talk. + </p> + <p> + “Good day, brother!” she cried. “How glad I am to see you! Constantine is + not at home, but will be back presently.” + </p> + <p> + “Where is he?” + </p> + <p> + “Doing business in the village with a party of factors,” replied the lady + as she conducted her guests to the drawing-room. + </p> + <p> + With no little curiosity did Chichikov gaze at the interior of the mansion + inhabited by the man who received an annual income of two hundred thousand + roubles; for he thought to discern therefrom the nature of its proprietor, + even as from a shell one may deduce the species of oyster or snail which + has been its tenant, and has left therein its impression. But no such + conclusions were to be drawn. The rooms were simple, and even bare. Not a + fresco nor a picture nor a bronze nor a flower nor a china what-not nor a + book was there to be seen. In short, everything appeared to show that the + proprietor of this abode spent the greater part of his time, not between + four walls, but in the field, and that he thought out his plans, not in + sybaritic fashion by the fireside, nor in an easy chair beside the stove, + but on the spot where work was actually in progress—that, in a word, + where those plans were conceived, there they were put into execution. Nor + in these rooms could Chichikov detect the least trace of a feminine hand, + beyond the fact that certain tables and chairs bore drying-boards whereon + were arranged some sprinklings of flower petals. + </p> + <p> + “What is all this rubbish for?” asked Platon. + </p> + <p> + “It is not rubbish,” replied the lady of the house. “On the contrary, it + is the best possible remedy for fever. Last year we cured every one of our + sick peasants with it. Some of the petals I am going to make into an + ointment, and some into an infusion. You may laugh as much as you like at + my potting and preserving, yet you yourself will be glad of things of the + kind when you set out on your travels.” + </p> + <p> + Platon moved to the piano, and began to pick out a note or two. + </p> + <p> + “Good Lord, what an ancient instrument!” he exclaimed. “Are you not + ashamed of it, sister?” + </p> + <p> + “Well, the truth is that I get no time to practice my music. You see,” she + added to Chichikov, “I have an eight-year-old daughter to educate; and to + hand her over to a foreign governess in order that I may have leisure for + my own piano-playing—well, that is a thing which I could never bring + myself to do.” + </p> + <p> + “You have become a wearisome sort of person,” commented Platon, and walked + away to the window. “Ah, here comes Constantine,” presently he added. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov also glanced out of the window, and saw approaching the verandah + a brisk, swarthy-complexioned man of about forty, a man clad in a rough + cloth jacket and a velveteen cap. Evidently he was one of those who care + little for the niceties of dress. With him, bareheaded, there came a + couple of men of a somewhat lower station in life, and all three were + engaged in an animated discussion. One of the barin’s two companions was a + plain peasant, and the other (clad in a blue Siberian smock) a travelling + factor. The fact that the party halted awhile by the entrance steps made + it possible to overhear a portion of their conversation from within. + </p> + <p> + “This is what you peasants had better do,” the barin was saying. “Purchase + your release from your present master. I will lend you the necessary + money, and afterwards you can work for me.” + </p> + <p> + “No, Constantine Thedorovitch,” replied the peasant. “Why should we do + that? Remove us just as we are. You will know how to arrange it, for a + cleverer gentleman than you is nowhere to be found. The misfortune of us + muzhiks is that we cannot protect ourselves properly. The tavern-keepers + sell us such liquor that, before a man knows where he is, a glassful of it + has eaten a hole through his stomach, and made him feel as though he could + drink a pail of water. Yes, it knocks a man over before he can look + around. Everywhere temptation lies in wait for the peasant, and he needs + to be cunning if he is to get through the world at all. In fact, things + seem to be contrived for nothing but to make us peasants lose our wits, + even to the tobacco which they sell us. What are folk like ourselves to + do, Constantine Thedorovitch? I tell you it is terribly difficult for a + muzhik to look after himself.” + </p> + <p> + “Listen to me. This is how things are done here. When I take on a serf, I + fit him out with a cow and a horse. On the other hand, I demand of him + thereafter more than is demanded of a peasant anywhere else. That is to + say, first and foremost I make him work. Whether a peasant be working for + himself or for me, never do I let him waste time. I myself toil like a + bullock, and I force my peasants to do the same, for experience has taught + me that that is the only way to get through life. All the mischief in the + world comes through lack of employment. Now, do you go and consider the + matter, and talk it over with your mir <a href="#linknote-48" + id="linknoteref-48"><small>48</small></a>.” + </p> + <p> + “We have done that already, Constantine Thedorovitch, and our elders’ + opinion is: ‘There is no need for further talk. Every peasant belonging to + Constantine Thedorovitch is well off, and hasn’t to work for nothing. The + priests of his village, too, are men of good heart, whereas ours have been + taken away, and there is no one to bury us.’” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless, do you go and talk the matter over again.” + </p> + <p> + “We will, barin.” + </p> + <p> + Here the factor who had been walking on the barin’s other side put in a + word. + </p> + <p> + “Constantine Thedorovitch,” he said, “I beg of you to do as I have + requested.” + </p> + <p> + “I have told you before,” replied the barin, “that I do not care to play + the huckster. I am not one of those landowners whom fellows of your sort + visit on the very day that the interest on a mortgage is due. Ah, I know + your fraternity thoroughly, and know that you keep lists of all who have + mortgages to repay. But what is there so clever about that? Any man, if + you pinch him sufficiently, will surrender you a mortgage at half-price,—any + man, that is to say, except myself, who care nothing for your money. Were + a loan of mine to remain out three years, I should never demand a kopeck + of interest on it.” + </p> + <p> + “Quite so, Constantine Thedorovitch,” replied the factor. “But I am asking + this of you more for the purpose of establishing us on a business footing + than because I desire to win your favour. Prey, therefore, accept this + earnest money of three thousand roubles.” And the man drew from his breast + pocket a dirty roll of bank-notes, which, carelessly receiving, + Kostanzhoglo thrust, uncounted, into the back pocket of his overcoat. + </p> + <p> + “Hm!” thought Chichikov. “For all he cares, the notes might have been a + handkerchief.” + </p> + <p> + When Kostanzhoglo appeared at closer quarters—that is to say, in the + doorway of the drawing-room—he struck Chichikov more than ever with + the swarthiness of his complexion, the dishevelment of his black, slightly + grizzled locks, the alertness of his eye, and the impression of fiery + southern origin which his whole personality diffused. For he was not + wholly a Russian, nor could he himself say precisely who his forefathers + had been. Yet, inasmuch as he accounted genealogical research no part of + the science of estate-management, but a mere superfluity, he looked upon + himself as, to all intents and purposes, a native of Russia, and the more + so since the Russian language was the only tongue he knew. + </p> + <p> + Platon presented Chichikov, and the pair exchanged greetings. + </p> + <p> + “To get rid of my depression, Constantine,” continued Platon, “I am + thinking of accompanying our guest on a tour through a few of the + provinces.” + </p> + <p> + “An excellent idea,” said Kostanzhoglo. “But precisely whither?” he added, + turning hospitably to Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “To tell you the truth,” replied that personage with an affable + inclination of the head as he smoothed the arm of his chair with his hand, + “I am travelling less on my own affairs than on the affairs of others. + That is to say, General Betristchev, an intimate friend, and, I might add, + a generous benefactor, of mine, has charged me with commissions to some of + his relatives. Nevertheless, though relatives are relatives, I may say + that I am travelling on my own account as well, in that, in addition to + possible benefit to my health, I desire to see the world and the whirligig + of humanity, which constitute, so to speak, a living book, a second course + of education.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, there is no harm in looking at other corners of the world besides + one’s own.” + </p> + <p> + “You speak truly. There IS no harm in such a proceeding. Thereby one may + see things which one has not before encountered, one may meet men with + whom one has not before come in contact. And with some men of that kind a + conversation is as precious a benefit as has been conferred upon me by the + present occasion. I come to you, most worthy Constantine Thedorovitch, for + instruction, and again for instruction, and beg of you to assuage my + thirst with an exposition of the truth as it is. I hunger for the favour + of your words as for manna.” + </p> + <p> + “But how so? What can <i>I</i> teach you?” exclaimed Kostanzhoglo in + confusion. “I myself was given but the plainest of educations.” + </p> + <p> + “Nay, most worthy sir, you possess wisdom, and again wisdom. Wisdom only + can direct the management of a great estate, that can derive a sound + income from the same, that can acquire wealth of a real, not a fictitious, + order while also fulfilling the duties of a citizen and thereby earning + the respect of the Russian public. All this I pray you to teach me.” + </p> + <p> + “I tell you what,” said Kostanzhoglo, looking meditatively at his guest. + “You had better stay with me for a few days, and during that time I can + show you how things are managed here, and explain to you everything. Then + you will see for yourself that no great wisdom is required for the + purpose.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, certainly you must stay here,” put in the lady of the house. Then, + turning to her brother, she added: “And you too must stay. Why should you + be in such a hurry?” + </p> + <p> + “Very well,” he replied. “But what say YOU, Paul Ivanovitch?” + </p> + <p> + “I say the same as you, and with much pleasure,” replied Chichikov. “But + also I ought to tell you this: that there is a relative of General + Betristchev’s, a certain Colonel Koshkarev—” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, we know him; but he is quite mad.” + </p> + <p> + “As you say, he is mad, and I should not have been intending to visit him, + were it not that General Betristchev is an intimate friend of mine, as + well as, I might add, my most generous benefactor.” + </p> + <p> + “Then,” said Kostanzhoglo, “do you go and see Colonel Koshkarev NOW. He + lives less than ten versts from here, and I have a gig already harnessed. + Go to him at once, and return here for tea.” + </p> + <p> + “An excellent idea!” cried Chichikov, and with that he seized his cap. + </p> + <p> + Half an hour’s drive sufficed to bring him to the Colonel’s establishment. + The village attached to the manor was in a state of utter confusion, since + in every direction building and repairing operations were in progress, and + the alleys were choked with heaps of lime, bricks, and beams of wood. + Also, some of the huts were arranged to resemble offices, and superscribed + in gilt letters “Depot for Agricultural Implements,” “Chief Office of + Accounts,” “Estate Works Committee,” “Normal School for the Education of + Colonists,” and so forth. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov found the Colonel posted behind a desk and holding a pen between + his teeth. Without an instant’s delay the master of the establishment—who + seemed a kindly, approachable man, and accorded to his visitor a very + civil welcome—plunged into a recital of the labour which it had cost + him to bring the property to its present condition of affluence. Then he + went on to lament the fact that he could not make his peasantry understand + the incentives to labour which the riches of science and art provide; for + instance, he had failed to induce his female serfs to wear corsets, + whereas in Germany, where he had resided for fourteen years, every humble + miller’s daughter could play the piano. None the less, he said, he meant + to peg away until every peasant on the estate should, as he walked behind + the plough, indulge in a regular course of reading Franklin’s Notes on + Electricity, Virgil’s Georgics, or some work on the chemical properties of + soil. + </p> + <p> + “Good gracious!” mentally exclaimed Chichikov. “Why, I myself have not had + time to finish that book by the Duchesse de la Valliere!” + </p> + <p> + Much else the Colonel said. In particular did he aver that, provided the + Russian peasant could be induced to array himself in German costume, + science would progress, trade increase, and the Golden Age dawn in Russia. + </p> + <p> + For a while Chichikov listened with distended eyes. Then he felt + constrained to intimate that with all that he had nothing to do, seeing + that his business was merely to acquire a few souls, and thereafter to + have their purchase confirmed. + </p> + <p> + “If I understand you aright,” said the Colonel, “you wish to present a + Statement of Plea?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, that is so.” + </p> + <p> + “Then kindly put it into writing, and it shall be forwarded to the Office + for the Reception of Reports and Returns. Thereafter that Office will + consider it, and return it to me, who will, in turn, dispatch it to the + Estate Works Committee, who will, in turn, revise it, and present it to + the Administrator, who, jointly with the Secretary, will—” + </p> + <p> + “Pardon me,” expostulated Chichikov, “but that procedure will take up a + great deal of time. Why need I put the matter into writing at all? It is + simply this. I want a few souls which are—well, which are, so to + speak, dead.” + </p> + <p> + “Very good,” commented the Colonel. “Do you write down in your Statement + of Plea that the souls which you desire are, ‘so to speak, dead.’” + </p> + <p> + “But what would be the use of my doing so? Though the souls are dead, my + purpose requires that they should be represented as alive.” + </p> + <p> + “Very good,” again commented the Colonel. “Do you write down in your + Statement that ‘it is necessary’ (or, should you prefer an alternative + phrase, ‘it is requested,’ or ‘it is desiderated,’ or ‘it is prayed,’) + ‘that the souls be represented as alive.’ At all events, WITHOUT + documentary process of that kind, the matter cannot possibly be carried + through. Also, I will appoint a Commissioner to guide you round the + various Offices.” + </p> + <p> + And he sounded a bell; whereupon there presented himself a man whom, + addressing as “Secretary,” the Colonel instructed to summon the + “Commissioner.” The latter, on appearing, was seen to have the air, half + of a peasant, half of an official. + </p> + <p> + “This man,” the Colonel said to Chichikov, “will act as your escort.” + </p> + <p> + What could be done with a lunatic like Koshkarev? In the end, curiosity + moved Chichikov to accompany the Commissioner. The Committee for the + Reception of Reports and Returns was discovered to have put up its + shutters, and to have locked its doors, for the reason that the Director + of the Committee had been transferred to the newly-formed Committee of + Estate Management, and his successor had been annexed by the same + Committee. Next, Chichikov and his escort rapped at the doors of the + Department of Estate Affairs; but that Department’s quarters happened to + be in a state of repair, and no one could be made to answer the summons + save a drunken peasant from whom not a word of sense was to be extracted. + At length the escort felt himself moved to remark: + </p> + <p> + “There is a deal of foolishness going on here. Fellows like that drunkard + lead the barin by the nose, and everything is ruled by the Committee of + Management, which takes men from their proper work, and sets them to do + any other it likes. Indeed, only through the Committee does ANYTHING get + done.” + </p> + <p> + By this time Chichikov felt that he had seen enough; wherefore he returned + to the Colonel, and informed him that the Office for the Reception of + Reports and Returns had ceased to exist. At once the Colonel flamed to + noble rage. Pressing Chichikov’s hand in token of gratitude for the + information which the guest had furnished, he took paper and pen, and + noted eight searching questions under three separate headings: (1) “Why + has the Committee of Management presumed to issue orders to officials not + under its jurisdiction?” (2) “Why has the Chief Manager permitted his + predecessor, though still in retention of his post, to follow him to + another Department?” and (3) “Why has the Committee of Estate Affairs + suffered the Office for the Reception of Reports and Returns to lapse?” + </p> + <p> + “Now for a row!” thought Chichikov to himself, and turned to depart; but + his host stopped him, saying: + </p> + <p> + “I cannot let you go, for, in addition to my honour having become + involved, it behoves me to show my people how the regular, the organised, + administration of an estate may be conducted. Herewith I will hand over + the conduct of your affair to a man who is worth all the rest of the staff + put together, and has had a university education. Also, the better to lose + no time, may I humbly beg you to step into my library, where you will find + notebooks, paper, pens, and everything else that you may require. Of these + articles pray make full use, for you are a gentleman of letters, and it is + your and my joint duty to bring enlightenment to all.” + </p> + <p> + So saying, he ushered his guest into a large room lined from floor to + ceiling with books and stuffed specimens. The books in question were + divided into sections—a section on forestry, a section on + cattle-breeding, a section on the raising of swine, and a section on + horticulture, together with special journals of the type circulated merely + for the purposes of reference, and not for general reading. Perceiving + that these works were scarcely of a kind calculated to while away an idle + hour, Chichikov turned to a second bookcase. But to do so was to fall out + of the frying-pan into the fire, for the contents of the second bookcase + proved to be works on philosophy, while, in particular, six huge volumes + confronted him under a label inscribed “A Preparatory Course to the + Province of Thought, with the Theory of Community of Effort, Co-operation, + and Subsistence, in its Application to a Right Understanding of the + Organic Principles of a Mutual Division of Social Productivity.” Indeed, + wheresoever Chichikov looked, every page presented to his vision some such + words as “phenomenon,” “development,” “abstract,” “contents,” and + “synopsis.” “This is not the sort of thing for me,” he murmured, and + turned his attention to a third bookcase, which contained books on the + Arts. Extracting a huge tome in which some by no means reticent + mythological illustrations were contained, he set himself to examine these + pictures. They were of the kind which pleases mostly middle-aged bachelors + and old men who are accustomed to seek in the ballet and similar + frivolities a further spur to their waning passions. Having concluded his + examination, Chichikov had just extracted another volume of the same + species when Colonel Koshkarev returned with a document of some sort and a + radiant countenance. + </p> + <p> + “Everything has been carried through in due form!” he cried. “The man whom + I mentioned is a genius indeed, and I intend not only to promote him over + the rest, but also to create for him a special Department. Herewith shall + you hear what a splendid intellect is his, and how in a few minutes he has + put the whole affair in order.” + </p> + <p> + “May the Lord be thanked for that!” thought Chichikov. Then he settled + himself while the Colonel read aloud: + </p> + <p> + “‘After giving full consideration to the Reference which your Excellency + has entrusted to me, I have the honour to report as follows: + </p> + <p> + “‘(1) In the Statement of Plea presented by one Paul Ivanovitch Chichikov, + Gentleman, Chevalier, and Collegiate Councillor, there lurks an error, in + that an oversight has led the Petitioner to apply to Revisional Souls the + term “Dead.” Now, from the context it would appear that by this term the + Petitioner desires to signify Souls Approaching Death rather than Souls + Actually Deceased: wherefore the term employed betrays such an empirical + instruction in letters as must, beyond doubt, have been confined to the + Village School, seeing that in truth the Soul is Deathless.’ + </p> + <p> + “The rascal!” Koshkarev broke off to exclaim delightedly. “He has got you + there, Monsieur Chichikov. And you will admit that he has a sufficiently + incisive pen? + </p> + <p> + “‘(2) On this Estate there exist no Unmortgaged Souls whatsoever, whether + Approaching Death or Otherwise; for the reason that all Souls thereon have + been pledged not only under a First Deed of Mortgage, but also (for the + sum of One Hundred and Fifty Roubles per Soul) under a Second,—the + village of Gurmailovka alone excepted, in that, in consequence of a Suit + having been brought against Landowner Priadistchev, and of a caveat having + been pronounced by the Land Court, and of such caveat having been + published in No. 42 of the Gazette of Moscow, the said Village has come + within the Jurisdiction of the Court Above-Mentioned.” + </p> + <p> + “Why did you not tell me all this before?” cried Chichikov furiously. “Why + you have kept me dancing about for nothing?” + </p> + <p> + “Because it was absolutely necessary that you should view the matter + through forms of documentary process. This is no jest on my part. The + inexperienced may see things subconsciously, yet it is imperative that he + should also see them CONSCIOUSLY.” + </p> + <p> + But to Chichikov’s patience an end had come. Seizing his cap, and casting + all ceremony to the winds, he fled from the house, and rushed through the + courtyard. As it happened, the man who had driven him thither had, warned + by experience, not troubled even to take out the horses, since he knew + that such a proceeding would have entailed not only the presentation of a + Statement of Plea for fodder, but also a delay of twenty-four hours until + the Resolution granting the same should have been passed. Nevertheless the + Colonel pursued his guest to the gates, and pressed his hand warmly as he + thanked him for having enabled him (the Colonel) thus to exhibit in + operation the proper management of an estate. Also, he begged to state + that, under the circumstances, it was absolutely necessary to keep things + moving and circulating, since, otherwise, slackness was apt to supervene, + and the working of the machine to grow rusty and feeble; but that, in + spite of all, the present occasion had inspired him with a happy idea—namely, + the idea of instituting a Committee which should be entitled “The + Committee of Supervision of the Committee of Management,” and which should + have for its function the detection of backsliders among the body first + mentioned. + </p> + <p> + It was late when, tired and dissatisfied, Chichikov regained + Kostanzhoglo’s mansion. Indeed, the candles had long been lit. + </p> + <p> + “What has delayed you?” asked the master of the house as Chichikov entered + the drawing-room. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, what has kept you and the Colonel so long in conversation together?” + added Platon. + </p> + <p> + “This—the fact that never in my life have I come across such an + imbecile,” was Chichikov’s reply. + </p> + <p> + “Never mind,” said Kostanzhoglo. “Koshkarev is a most reassuring + phenomenon. He is necessary in that in him we see expressed in caricature + all the more crying follies of our intellectuals—of the + intellectuals who, without first troubling to make themselves acquainted + with their own country, borrow silliness from abroad. Yet that is how + certain of our landowners are now carrying on. They have set up ‘offices’ + and factories and schools and ‘commissions,’ and the devil knows what else + besides. A fine lot of wiseacres! After the French War in 1812 they had to + reconstruct their affairs: and see how they have done it! Yet so much + worse have they done it than a Frenchman would have done that any fool of + a Peter Petrovitch Pietukh now ranks as a good landowner!” + </p> + <p> + “But he has mortgaged the whole of his estate?” remarked Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, nowadays everything is being mortgaged, or is going to be.” This + said, Kostanzhoglo’s temper rose still further. “Out upon your factories + of hats and candles!” he cried. “Out upon procuring candle-makers from + London, and then turning landowners into hucksters! To think of a Russian + pomiestchik <a href="#linknote-49" id="linknoteref-49"><small>49</small></a>, a member of the noblest of + callings, conducting workshops and cotton mills! Why, it is for the + wenches of towns to handle looms for muslin and lace.” + </p> + <p> + “But you yourself maintain workshops?” remarked Platon. + </p> + <p> + “I do; but who established them? They established themselves. For + instance, wool had accumulated, and since I had nowhere to store it, I + began to weave it into cloth—but, mark you, only into good, plain + cloth of which I can dispose at a cheap rate in the local markets, and + which is needed by peasants, including my own. Again, for six years on end + did the fish factories keep dumping their offal on my bank of the river; + wherefore, at last, as there was nothing to be done with it, I took to + boiling it into glue, and cleared forty thousand roubles by the process.” + </p> + <p> + “The devil!” thought Chichikov to himself as he stared at his host. “What + a fist this man has for making money!” + </p> + <p> + “Another reason why I started those factories,” continued Kostanzhoglo, + “is that they might give employment to many peasants who would otherwise + have starved. You see, the year happened to have been a lean one—thanks + to those same industry-mongering landowners, in that they had neglected to + sow their crops; and now my factories keep growing at the rate of a + factory a year, owing to the circumstance that such quantities of remnants + and cuttings become so accumulated that, if a man looks carefully to his + management, he will find every sort of rubbish to be capable of bringing + in a return—yes, to the point of his having to reject money on the + plea that he has no need of it. Yet I do not find that to do all this I + require to build a mansion with facades and pillars!” + </p> + <p> + “Marvellous!” exclaimed Chichikov. “Beyond all things does it surprise me + that refuse can be so utilised.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, and that is what can be done by SIMPLE methods. But nowadays every + one is a mechanic, and wants to open that money chest with an instrument + instead of simply. For that purpose he hies him to England. Yes, THAT is + the thing to do. What folly!” Kostanzhoglo spat and added: “Yet when he + returns from abroad he is a hundred times more ignorant than when he + went.” + </p> + <p> + “Ah, Constantine,” put in his wife anxiously, “you know how bad for you it + is to talk like this.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but how am I to help losing my temper? The thing touches me too + closely, it vexes me too deeply to think that the Russian character should + be degenerating. For in that character there has dawned a sort of + Quixotism which never used to be there. Yes, no sooner does a man get a + little education into his head than he becomes a Don Quixote, and + establishes schools on his estate such as even a madman would never have + dreamed of. And from that school there issues a workman who is good for + nothing, whether in the country or in the town—a fellow who drinks + and is for ever standing on his dignity. Yet still our landowners keep + taking to philanthropy, to converting themselves into philanthropic + knights-errant, and spending millions upon senseless hospitals and + institutions, and so ruining themselves and turning their families adrift. + Yes, that is all that comes of philanthropy.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov’s business had nothing to do with the spread of enlightenment, + he was but seeking an opportunity to inquire further concerning the + putting of refuse to lucrative uses; but Kostanzhoglo would not let him + get a word in edgeways, so irresistibly did the flow of sarcastic comment + pour from the speaker’s lips. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” went on Kostanzhoglo, “folk are always scheming to educate the + peasant. But first make him well-off and a good farmer. THEN he will + educate himself fast enough. As things are now, the world has grown stupid + to a degree that passes belief. Look at the stuff our present-day + scribblers write! Let any sort of a book be published, and at once you + will see every one making a rush for it. Similarly will you find folk + saying: ‘The peasant leads an over-simple life. He ought to be + familiarised with luxuries, and so led to yearn for things above his + station.’ And the result of such luxuries will be that the peasant will + become a rag rather than a man, and suffer from the devil only knows what + diseases, until there will remain in the land not a boy of eighteen who + will not have experienced the whole gamut of them, and found himself left + with not a tooth in his jaws or a hair on his pate. Yes, that is what will + come of infecting the peasant with such rubbish. But, thank God, there is + still one healthy class left to us—a class which has never taken up + with the ‘advantages’ of which I speak. For that we ought to be grateful. + And since, even yet, the Russian agriculturist remains the most + respect-worthy man in the land, why should he be touched? Would to God + every one were an agriculturist!” + </p> + <p> + “Then you believe agriculture to be the most profitable of occupations?” + said Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “The best, at all events—if not the most profitable. ‘In the sweat + of thy brow shalt thou till the land.’ To quote that requires no great + wisdom, for the experience of ages has shown us that, in the agricultural + calling, man has ever remained more moral, more pure, more noble than in + any other. Of course I do not mean to imply that no other calling ought to + be practised: simply that the calling in question lies at the root of all + the rest. However much factories may be established privately or by the + law, there will still lie ready to man’s hand all that he needs—he + will still require none of those amenities which are sapping the vitality + of our present-day folk, nor any of those industrial establishments which + make their profit, and keep themselves going, by causing foolish measures + to be adopted which, in the end, are bound to deprave and corrupt our + unfortunate masses. I myself am determined never to establish any + manufacture, however profitable, which will give rise to a demand for + ‘higher things,’ such as sugar and tobacco—no not if I lose a + million by my refusing to do so. If corruption MUST overtake the MIR, it + shall not be through my hands. And I think that God will justify me in my + resolve. Twenty years have I lived among the common folk, and I know what + will inevitably come of such things.” + </p> + <p> + “But what surprises me most,” persisted Chichikov, “is that from refuse it + should be possible, with good management, to make such an immensity of + profit.” + </p> + <p> + “And as for political economy,” continued Kostanzhoglo, without noticing + him, and with his face charged with bilious sarcasm, “—as for + political economy, it is a fine thing indeed. Just one fool sitting on + another fool’s back, and flogging him along, even though the rider can see + no further than his own nose! Yet into the saddle will that fool climb—spectacles + and all! Oh, the folly, the folly of such things!” And the speaker spat + derisively. + </p> + <p> + “That may be true,” said his wife. “Yet you must not get angry about it. + Surely one can speak on such subjects without losing one’s temper?” + </p> + <p> + “As I listen to you, most worthy Constantine Thedorovitch,” Chichikov + hastened to remark, “it becomes plain to me that you have penetrated into + the meaning of life, and laid your finger upon the essential root of the + matter. Yet supposing, for a moment, we leave the affairs of humanity in + general, and turn our attention to a purely individual affair, might I ask + you how, in the case of a man becoming a landowner, and having a mind to + grow wealthy as quickly as possible (in order that he may fulfil his + bounden obligations as a citizen), he can best set about it?” + </p> + <p> + “How he can best set about growing wealthy?” repeated Kostanzhoglo. “Why,—” + </p> + <p> + “Let us go to supper,” interrupted the lady of the house, rising from her + chair, and moving towards the centre of the room, where she wrapped her + shivering young form in a shawl. Chichikov sprang up with the alacrity of + a military man, offered her his arm, and escorted her, as on parade, to + the dining-room, where awaiting them there was the soup-toureen. From it + the lid had just been removed, and the room was redolent of the fragrant + odour of early spring roots and herbs. The company took their seats, and + at once the servants placed the remainder of the dishes (under covers) + upon the table and withdrew, for Kostanzhoglo hated to have servants + listening to their employers’ conversation, and objected still more to + their staring at him all the while that he was eating. + </p> + <p> + When the soup had been consumed, and glasses of an excellent vintage + resembling Hungarian wine had been poured out, Chichikov said to his host: + </p> + <p> + “Most worthy sir, allow me once more to direct your attention to the + subject of which we were speaking at the point when the conversation + became interrupted. You will remember that I was asking you how best a man + can set about, proceed in, the matter of growing...” + </p> +<p class="center p2"> + [Here from the original two pages are missing.] +</p> + <p> + ... “A property for which, had he asked forty thousand, I should still + have demanded a reduction.” + </p> + <p> + “Hm!” thought Chichikov; then added aloud: “But why do you not purchase it + yourself?” + </p> + <p> + “Because to everything there must be assigned a limit. Already my property + keeps me sufficiently employed. Moreover, I should cause our local + dvoriane to begin crying out in chorus that I am exploiting their + extremities, their ruined position, for the purpose of acquiring land for + under its value. Of that I am weary.” + </p> + <p> + “How readily folk speak evil!” exclaimed Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, and the amount of evil-speaking in our province surpasses belief. + Never will you hear my name mentioned without my being called also a miser + and a usurer of the worst possible sort; whereas my accusers justify + themselves in everything, and say that, ‘though we have wasted our money, + we have started a demand for the higher amenities of life, and therefore + encouraged industry with our wastefulness, a far better way of doing + things than that practised by Kostanzhoglo, who lives like a pig.’” + </p> + <p> + “Would <i>I</i> could live in your ‘piggish’ fashion!” ejaculated + Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “And so forth, and so forth. Yet what are the ‘higher amenities of life’? + What good can they do to any one? Even if a landowner of the day sets up a + library, he never looks at a single book in it, but soon relapses into + card-playing—the usual pursuit. Yet folk call me names simply + because I do not waste my means upon the giving of dinners! One reason why + I do not give such dinners is that they weary me; and another reason is + that I am not used to them. But come you to my house for the purpose of + taking pot luck, and I shall be delighted to see you. Also, folk foolishly + say that I lend money on interest; whereas the truth is that if you should + come to me when you are really in need, and should explain to me openly + how you propose to employ my money, and I should perceive that you are + purposing to use that money wisely, and that you are really likely to + profit thereby—well, in that case you would find me ready to lend + you all that you might ask without interest at all.” + </p> + <p> + “That is a thing which it is well to know,” reflected Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” repeated Kostanzhoglo, “under those circumstances I should never + refuse you my assistance. But I do object to throwing my money to the + winds. Pardon me for expressing myself so plainly. To think of lending + money to a man who is merely devising a dinner for his mistress, or + planning to furnish his house like a lunatic, or thinking of taking his + paramour to a masked ball or a jubilee in honour of some one who had + better never have been born!” + </p> + <p> + And, spitting, he came near to venting some expression which would + scarcely have been becoming in the presence of his wife. Over his face the + dark shadow of hypochondria had cast a cloud, and furrows had formed on + his brow and temples, and his every gesture bespoke the influence of a + hot, nervous rancour. + </p> + <p> + “But allow me once more to direct your attention to the subject of our + recently interrupted conversation,” persisted Chichikov as he sipped a + glass of excellent raspberry wine. “That is to say, supposing I were to + acquire the property which you have been good enough to bring to my + notice, how long would it take me to grow rich?” + </p> + <p> + “That would depend on yourself,” replied Kostanzhoglo with grim abruptness + and evident ill-humour. “You might either grow rich quickly or you might + never grow rich at all. If you made up your mind to grow rich, sooner or + later you would find yourself a wealthy man.” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed?” ejaculated Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Yes,” replied Kostanzhoglo, as sharply as though he were angry with + Chichikov. “You would merely need to be fond of work: otherwise you would + effect nothing. The main thing is to like looking after your property. + Believe me, you would never grow weary of doing so. People would have it + that life in the country is dull; whereas, if I were to spend a single day + as it is spent by some folk, with their stupid clubs and their restaurants + and their theatres, I should die of ennui. The fools, the idiots, the + generations of blind dullards! But a landowner never finds the days + wearisome—he has not the time. In his life not a moment remains + unoccupied; it is full to the brim. And with it all goes an endless + variety of occupations. And what occupations! Occupations which genuinely + uplift the soul, seeing that the landowner walks with nature and the + seasons of the year, and takes part in, and is intimate with, everything + which is evolved by creation. For let us look at the round of the year’s + labours. Even before spring has arrived there will have begun a general + watching and a waiting for it, and a preparing for sowing, and an + apportioning of crops, and a measuring of seed grain by byres, and drying + of seed, and a dividing of the workers into teams. For everything needs to + be examined beforehand, and calculations must be made at the very start. + And as soon as ever the ice shall have melted, and the rivers be flowing, + and the land have dried sufficiently to be workable, the spade will begin + its task in kitchen and flower garden, and the plough and the harrow their + tasks in the field; until everywhere there will be tilling and sowing and + planting. And do you understand what the sum of that labour will mean? It + will mean that the harvest is being sown, that the welfare of the world is + being sown, that the food of millions is being put into the earth. And + thereafter will come summer, the season of reaping, endless reaping; for + suddenly the crops will have ripened, and rye-sheaf will be lying heaped + upon rye-sheaf, with, elsewhere, stocks of barley, and of oats, and of + wheat. And everything will be teeming with life, and not a moment will + there need to be lost, seeing that, had you even twenty eyes, you would + have need for them all. And after the harvest festivities there will be + grain to be carted to byre or stacked in ricks, and stores to be prepared + for the winter, and storehouses and kilns and cattle-sheds to be cleaned + for the same purpose, and the women to be assigned their tasks, and the + totals of everything to be calculated, so that one may see the value of + what has been done. And lastly will come winter, when in every + threshing-floor the flail will be working, and the grain, when threshed, + will need to be carried from barn to binn, and the mills require to be + seen to, and the estate factories to be inspected, and the workmen’s huts + to be visited for the purpose of ascertaining how the muzhik is faring + (for, given a carpenter who is clever with his tools, I, for one, am only + too glad to spend an hour or two in his company, so cheering to me is + labour). And if, in addition, one discerns the end to which everything is + moving, and the manner in which the things of earth are everywhere + multiplying and multiplying, and bringing forth more and more fruit to + one’s profiting, I cannot adequately express what takes place in a man’s + soul. And that, not because of the growth in his wealth—money is + money and no more—but because he will feel that everything is the + work of his own hands, and that he has been the cause of everything, and + its creator, and that from him, as from a magician, there has flowed + bounty and goodness for all. In what other calling will you find such + delights in prospect?” As he spoke, Kostanzhoglo raised his face, and it + became clear that the wrinkles had fled from it, and that, like the Tsar + on the solemn day of his crowning, Kostanzhoglo’s whole form was diffusing + light, and his features had in them a gentle radiance. “In all the world,” + he repeated, “you will find no joys like these, for herein man imitates + the God who projected creation as the supreme happiness, and now demands + of man that he, too, should act as the creator of prosperity. Yet there + are folk who call such functions tedious!” + </p> + <p> + Kostanzhoglo’s mellifluous periods fell upon Chichikov’s ear like the + notes of a bird of paradise. From time to time he gulped, and his softened + eyes expressed the pleasure which it gave him to listen. + </p> + <p> + “Constantine, it is time to leave the table,” said the lady of the house, + rising from her seat. Every one followed her example, and Chichikov once + again acted as his hostess’s escort—although with less dexterity of + deportment than before, owing to the fact that this time his thoughts were + occupied with more essential matters of procedure. + </p> + <p> + “In spite of what you say,” remarked Platon as he walked behind the pair, + “I, for my part, find these things wearisome.” + </p> + <p> + But the master of the house paid no attention to his remark, for he was + reflecting that his guest was no fool, but a man of serious thought and + speech who did not take things lightly. And, with the thought, + Kostanzhoglo grew lighter in soul, as though he had warmed himself with + his own words, and were exulting in the fact that he had found some one + capable of listening to good advice. + </p> + <p> + When they had settled themselves in the cosy, candle-lighted drawing-room, + with its balcony and the glass door opening out into the garden—a + door through which the stars could be seen glittering amid the slumbering + tops of the trees—Chichikov felt more comfortable than he had done + for many a day past. It was as though, after long journeying, his own + roof-tree had received him once more—had received him when his quest + had been accomplished, when all that he wished for had been gained, when + his travelling-staff had been laid aside with the words “It is finished.” + And of this seductive frame of mind the true source had been the eloquent + discourse of his hospitable host. Yes, for every man there exist certain + things which, instantly that they are said, seem to touch him more + closely, more intimately, than anything has done before. Nor is it an + uncommon occurrence that in the most unexpected fashion, and in the most + retired of retreats, one will suddenly come face to face with a man whose + burning periods will lead one to forget oneself and the tracklessness of + the route and the discomfort of one’s nightly halting-places, and the + futility of crazes and the falseness of tricks by which one human being + deceives another. And at once there will become engraven upon one’s memory—vividly, + and for all time—the evening thus spent. And of that evening one’s + remembrance will hold true, both as to who was present, and where each + such person sat, and what he or she was wearing, and what the walls and + the stove and other trifling features of the room looked like. + </p> + <p> + In the same way did Chichikov note each detail that evening—both the + appointments of the agreeable, but not luxuriously furnished, room, and + the good-humoured expression which reigned on the face of the thoughtful + host, and the design of the curtains, and the amber-mounted pipe smoked by + Platon, and the way in which he kept puffing smoke into the fat jowl of + the dog Yarb, and the sneeze which, on each such occasion, Yarb vented, + and the laughter of the pleasant-faced hostess (though always followed by + the words “Pray do not tease him any more”) and the cheerful candle-light, + and the cricket chirping in a corner, and the glass door, and the spring + night which, laying its elbows upon the tree-tops, and spangled with + stars, and vocal with the nightingales which were pouring forth warbled + ditties from the recesses of the foliage, kept glancing through the door, + and regarding the company within. + </p> + <p> + “How it delights me to hear your words, good Constantine Thedorovitch!” + said Chichikov. “Indeed, nowhere in Russia have I met with a man of equal + intellect.” + </p> + <p> + Kostanzhoglo smiled, while realising that the compliment was scarcely + deserved. + </p> + <p> + “If you want a man of GENUINE intellect,” he said, “I can tell you of one. + He is a man whose boot soles are worth more than my whole body.” + </p> + <p> + “Who may he be?” asked Chichikov in astonishment. + </p> + <p> + “Murazov, our local Commissioner of Taxes.” + </p> + <p> + “Ah! I have heard of him before,” remarked Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “He is a man who, were he not the director of an estate, might well be a + director of the Empire. And were the Empire under my direction, I should + at once appoint him my Minister of Finance.” + </p> + <p> + “I have heard tales beyond belief concerning him—for instance, that + he has acquired ten million roubles.” + </p> + <p> + “Ten? More than forty. Soon half Russia will be in his hands.” + </p> + <p> + “You don’t say so?” cried Chichikov in amazement. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, certainly. The man who has only a hundred thousand roubles to work + with grows rich but slowly, whereas he who has millions at his disposal + can operate over a greater radius, and so back whatsoever he undertakes + with twice or thrice the money which can be brought against him. + Consequently his field becomes so spacious that he ends by having no + rivals. Yes, no one can compete with him, and, whatsoever price he may fix + for a given commodity, at that price it will have to remain, nor will any + man be able to outbid it.” + </p> + <p> + “My God!” muttered Chichikov, crossing himself, and staring at + Kostanzhoglo with his breath catching in his throat. “The mind cannot + grasp it—it petrifies one’s thoughts with awe. You see folk + marvelling at what Science has achieved in the matter of investigating the + habits of cowbugs, but to me it is a far more marvellous thing that in the + hands of a single mortal there can become accumulated such gigantic sums + of money. But may I ask whether the great fortune of which you speak has + been acquired through honest means?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes; through means of the most irreproachable kind—through the most + honourable of methods.” + </p> + <p> + “Yet so improbable does it seem that I can scarcely believe it. Thousands + I could understand, but millions—!” + </p> + <p> + “On the contrary, to make thousands honestly is a far more difficult + matter than to make millions. Millions are easily come by, for a + millionaire has no need to resort to crooked ways; the way lies straight + before him, and he needs but to annex whatsoever he comes across. No rival + will spring up to oppose him, for no rival will be sufficiently strong, + and since the millionaire can operate over an extensive radius, he can + bring (as I have said) two or three roubles to bear upon any one else’s + one. Consequently, what interest will he derive from a thousand roubles? + Why, ten or twenty per cent. at the least.” + </p> + <p> + “And it is beyond measure marvellous that the whole should have started + from a single kopeck.” + </p> + <p> + “Had it started otherwise, the thing could never have been done at all. + Such is the normal course. He who is born with thousands, and is brought + up to thousands, will never acquire a single kopeck more, for he will have + been set up with the amenities of life in advance, and so never come to + stand in need of anything. It is necessary to begin from the beginning + rather than from the middle; from a kopeck rather than from a rouble; from + the bottom rather than from the top. For only thus will a man get to know + the men and conditions among which his career will have to be carved. That + is to say, through encountering the rough and the tumble of life, and + through learning that every kopeck has to be beaten out with a + three-kopeck nail, and through worsting knave after knave, he will acquire + such a degree of perspicuity and wariness that he will err in nothing + which he may tackle, and never come to ruin. Believe me, it is so. The + beginning, and not the middle, is the right starting point. No one who + comes to me and says, ‘Give me a hundred thousand roubles, and I will grow + rich in no time,’ do I believe, for he is likely to meet with failure + rather than with the success of which he is so assured. ’Tis with a + kopeck, and with a kopeck only, that a man must begin.” + </p> + <p> + “If that is so, <i>I</i> shall grow rich,” said Chichikov, involuntarily + remembering the dead souls. “For of a surety <i>I</i> began with nothing.” + </p> + <p> + “Constantine, pray allow Paul Ivanovitch to retire to rest,” put in the + lady of the house. “It is high time, and I am sure you have talked + enough.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, beyond a doubt you will grow rich,” continued Kostanzhoglo, without + heeding his wife. “For towards you there will run rivers and rivers of + gold, until you will not know what to do with all your gains.” + </p> + <p> + As though spellbound, Chichikov sat in an aureate world of ever-growing + dreams and fantasies. All his thoughts were in a whirl, and on a carpet of + future wealth his tumultuous imagination was weaving golden patterns, + while ever in his ears were ringing the words, “towards you there will run + rivers and rivers of gold.” + </p> + <p> + “Really, Constantine, DO allow Paul Ivanovitch to go to bed.” + </p> + <p> + “What on earth is the matter?” retorted the master of the household + testily. “Pray go yourself if you wish to.” Then he stopped short, for the + snoring of Platon was filling the whole room, and also—outrivalling + it—that of the dog Yarb. This caused Kostanzhoglo to realise that + bedtime really had arrived; wherefore, after he had shaken Platon out of + his slumbers, and bidden Chichikov good night, all dispersed to their + several chambers, and became plunged in sleep. + </p> + <p> + All, that is to say, except Chichikov, whose thoughts remained wakeful, + and who kept wondering and wondering how best he could become the owner, + not of a fictitious, but of a real, estate. The conversation with his host + had made everything clear, had made the possibility of his acquiring + riches manifest, had made the difficult art of estate management at once + easy and understandable; until it would seem as though particularly was + his nature adapted for mastering the art in question. All that he would + need to do would be to mortgage the dead souls, and then to set up a + genuine establishment. Already he saw himself acting and administering as + Kostanzhoglo had advised him—energetically, and through personal + oversight, and undertaking nothing new until the old had been thoroughly + learned, and viewing everything with his own eyes, and making himself + familiar with each member of his peasantry, and abjuring all + superfluities, and giving himself up to hard work and husbandry. Yes, + already could he taste the pleasure which would be his when he had built + up a complete industrial organisation, and the springs of the industrial + machine were in vigorous working order, and each had become able to + reinforce the other. Labour should be kept in active operation, and, even + as, in a mill, flour comes flowing from grain, so should cash, and yet + more cash, come flowing from every atom of refuse and remnant. And all the + while he could see before him the landowner who was one of the leading men + in Russia, and for whom he had conceived such an unbounded respect. + Hitherto only for rank or for opulence had Chichikov respected a man—never + for mere intellectual power; but now he made a first exception in favour + of Kostanzhoglo, seeing that he felt that nothing undertaken by his host + could possibly come to naught. And another project which was occupying + Chichikov’s mind was the project of purchasing the estate of a certain + landowner named Khlobuev. Already Chichikov had at his disposal ten + thousand roubles, and a further fifteen thousand he would try and borrow + of Kostanzhoglo (seeing that the latter had himself said that he was + prepared to help any one who really desired to grow rich); while, as for + the remainder, he would either raise the sum by mortgaging the estate or + force Khlobuev to wait for it—just to tell him to resort to the + courts if such might be his pleasure. + </p> + <p> + Long did our hero ponder the scheme; until at length the slumber which + had, these four hours past, been holding the rest of the household in its + embraces enfolded also Chichikov, and he sank into oblivion. + </p> + <p> + <a id="link2HCH0015"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h3> + CHAPTER IV + </h3> + <p> + Next day, with Platon and Constantine, Chichikov set forth to interview + Khlobuev, the owner whose estate Constantine had consented to help + Chichikov to purchase with a non-interest-bearing, uncovenanted loan of + ten thousand roubles. Naturally, our hero was in the highest of spirits. + For the first fifteen versts or so the road led through forest land and + tillage belonging to Platon and his brother-in-law; but directly the limit + of these domains was reached, forest land began to be replaced with swamp, + and tillage with waste. Also, the village in Khlobuev’s estate had about + it a deserted air, and as for the proprietor himself, he was discovered in + a state of drowsy dishevelment, having not long left his bed. A man of + about forty, he had his cravat crooked, his frockcoat adorned with a large + stain, and one of his boots worn through. Nevertheless he seemed delighted + to see his visitors. + </p> + <p> + “What?” he exclaimed. “Constantine Thedorovitch and Platon Mikhalitch? + Really I must rub my eyes! Never again in this world did I look to see + callers arriving. As a rule, folk avoid me like the devil, for they cannot + disabuse their minds of the idea that I am going to ask them for a loan. + Yes, it is my own fault, I know, but what would you? To the end will swine + cheat swine. Pray excuse my costume. You will observe that my boots are in + holes. But how can I afford to get them mended?” + </p> + <p> + “Never mind,” said Constantine. “We have come on business only. May I + present to you a possible purchaser of your estate, in the person of Paul + Ivanovitch Chichikov?” + </p> + <p> + “I am indeed glad to meet you!” was Khlobuev’s response. “Pray shake hands + with me, Paul Ivanovitch.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov offered one hand, but not both. + </p> + <p> + “I can show you a property worth your attention,” went on the master of + the estate. “May I ask if you have yet dined?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, we have,” put in Constantine, desirous of escaping as soon as + possible. “To save you further trouble, let us go and view the estate at + once.” + </p> + <p> + “Very well,” replied Khlobuev. “Pray come and inspect my irregularities + and futilities. You have done well to dine beforehand, for not so much as + a fowl is left in the place, so dire are the extremities to which you see + me reduced.” + </p> + <p> + Sighing deeply, he took Platon by the arm (it was clear that he did not + look for any sympathy from Constantine) and walked ahead, while + Constantine and Chichikov followed. + </p> + <p> + “Things are going hard with me, Platon Mikhalitch,” continued Khlobuev. + “How hard you cannot imagine. No money have I, no food, no boots. Were I + still young and a bachelor, it would have come easy to me to live on bread + and cheese; but when a man is growing old, and has got a wife and five + children, such trials press heavily upon him, and, in spite of himself, + his spirits sink.” + </p> + <p> + “But, should you succeed in selling the estate, that would help to put you + right, would it not?” said Platon. + </p> + <p> + “How could it do so?” replied Khlobuev with a despairing gesture. “What I + might get for the property would have to go towards discharging my debts, + and I should find myself left with less than a thousand roubles besides.” + </p> + <p> + “Then what do you intend to do?” + </p> + <p> + “God knows.” + </p> + <p> + “But is there NOTHING to which you could set your hand in order to clear + yourself of your difficulties?” + </p> + <p> + “How could there be?” + </p> + <p> + “Well, you might accept a Government post.” + </p> + <p> + “Become a provincial secretary, you mean? How could I obtain such a post? + They would not offer me one of the meanest possible kind. Even supposing + that they did, how could I live on a salary of five hundred roubles—I + who have a wife and five children?” + </p> + <p> + “Then try and obtain a bailiff’s post.” + </p> + <p> + “Who would entrust their property to a man who has squandered his own + estate?” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless, when death and destitution threaten, a man must either do + something or starve. Shall I ask my brother to use his influence to + procure you a post?” + </p> + <p> + “No, no, Platon Mikhalitch,” sighed Khlobuev, gripping the other’s hand. + “I am no longer serviceable—I am grown old before my time, and find + that liver and rheumatism are paying me for the sins of my youth. Why + should the Government be put to a loss on my account?—not to speak + of the fact that for every salaried post there are countless numbers of + applicants. God forbid that, in order to provide me with a livelihood + further burdens should be imposed upon an impoverished public!” + </p> + <p> + “Such are the results of improvident management!” thought Platon to + himself. “The disease is even worse than my slothfulness.” + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile Kostanzhoglo, walking by Chichikov’s side, was almost taking + leave of his senses. + </p> + <p> + “Look at it!” he cried with a wave of his hand. “See to what wretchedness + the peasant has become reduced! Should cattle disease come, Khlobuev will + have nothing to fall back upon, but will be forced to sell his all—to + leave the peasant without a horse, and therefore without the means to + labour, even though the loss of a single day’s work may take years of + labour to rectify. Meanwhile it is plain that the local peasant has become + a mere dissolute, lazy drunkard. Give a muzhik enough to live upon for + twelve months without working, and you will corrupt him for ever, so + inured to rags and vagrancy will he grow. And what is the good of that + piece of pasture there—of that piece on the further side of those + huts? It is a mere flooded tract. Were it mine, I should put it under + flax, and clear five thousand roubles, or else sow it with turnips, and + clear, perhaps, four thousand. And see how the rye is drooping, and nearly + laid. As for wheat, I am pretty sure that he has not sown any. Look, too, + at those ravines! Were they mine, they would be standing under timber + which even a rook could not top. To think of wasting such quantities of + land! Where land wouldn’t bear corn, I should dig it up, and plant it with + vegetables. What ought to be done is that Khlobuev ought to take a spade + into his own hands, and to set his wife and children and servants to do + the same; and even if they died of the exertion, they would at least die + doing their duty, and not through guzzling at the dinner table.” + </p> + <p> + This said, Kostanzhoglo spat, and his brow flushed with grim indignation. + </p> + <p> + Presently they reached an elevation whence the distant flashing of a + river, with its flood waters and subsidiary streams, caught the eye, + while, further off, a portion of General Betristchev’s homestead could be + discerned among the trees, and, over it, a blue, densely wooded hill which + Chichikov guessed to be the spot where Tientietnikov’s mansion was + situated. + </p> + <p> + “This is where I should plant timber,” said Chichikov. “And, regarded as a + site for a manor house, the situation could scarcely be beaten for beauty + of view.” + </p> + <p> + “You seem to get great store upon views and beauty,” remarked Kostanzhoglo + with reproof in his tone. “Should you pay too much attention to those + things, you might find yourself without crops or view. Utility should be + placed first, not beauty. Beauty will come of itself. Take, for example, + towns. The fairest and most beautiful towns are those which have built + themselves—those in which each man has built to suit his own + exclusive circumstances and needs; whereas towns which men have + constructed on regular, string-taut lines are no better than collections + of barracks. Put beauty aside, and look only to what is NECESSARY.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but to me it would always be irksome to have to wait. All the time + that I was doing so I should be hungering to see in front of me the + sort of prospect which I prefer.” + </p> + <p> + “Come, come! Are you a man of twenty-five—you who have served as a + tchinovnik in St. Petersburg? Have patience, have patience. For six years + work, and work hard. Plant, sow, and dig the earth without taking a + moment’s rest. It will be difficult, I know—yes, difficult indeed; + but at the end of that time, if you have thoroughly stirred the soil, the + land will begin to help you as nothing else can do. That is to say, over + and above your seventy or so pairs of hands, there will begin to assist in + the work seven hundred pairs of hands which you cannot see. Thus + everything will be multiplied tenfold. I myself have ceased even to have + to lift a finger, for whatsoever needs to be done gets done of itself. + Nature loves patience: always remember that. It is a law given her of God + Himself, who has blessed all those who are strong to endure.” + </p> + <p> + “To hear your words is to be both encouraged and strengthened,” said + Chichikov. To this Kostanzhoglo made no reply, but presently went on: + </p> + <p> + “And see how that piece of land has been ploughed! To stay here longer is + more than I can do. For me, to have to look upon such want of orderliness + and foresight is death. Finish your business with Khlobuev without me, and + whatsoever you do, get this treasure out of that fool’s hands as quickly + as possible, for he is dishonouring God’s gifts.” + </p> + <p> + And Kostanzhoglo, his face dark with the rage that was seething in his + excitable soul, left Chichikov, and caught up the owner of the + establishment. + </p> + <p> + “What, Constantine Thedorovitch?” cried Khlobuev in astonishment. “Just + arrived, you are going already?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes; I cannot help it; urgent business requires me at home.” And entering + his gig, Kostanzhoglo drove rapidly away. Somehow Khlobuev seemed to + divine the cause of his sudden departure. + </p> + <p> + “It was too much for him,” he remarked. “An agriculturist of that kind + does not like to have to look upon the results of such feckless management + as mine. Would you believe it, Paul Ivanovitch, but this year I have been + unable to sow any wheat! Am I not a fine husbandman? There was no seed for + the purpose, nor yet anything with which to prepare the ground. No, I am + not like Constantine Thedorovitch, who, I hear, is a perfect Napoleon in + his particular line. Again and again the thought occurs to me, ‘Why has so + much intellect been put into that head, and only a drop or two into my own + dull pate?’ Take care of that puddle, gentlemen. I have told my peasants + to lay down planks for the spring, but they have not done so. Nevertheless + my heart aches for the poor fellows, for they need a good example, and + what sort of an example am I? How am <i>I</i> to give them orders? Pray + take them under your charge, Paul Ivanovitch, for I cannot teach them + orderliness and method when I myself lack both. As a matter of fact, I + should have given them their freedom long ago, had there been any use in + my doing so; for even I can see that peasants must first be afforded the + means of earning a livelihood before they can live. What they need is a + stern, yet just, master who shall live with them, day in, day out, and set + them an example of tireless energy. The present-day Russian—I know + of it myself—is helpless without a driver. Without one he falls + asleep, and the mould grows over him.” + </p> + <p> + “Yet I cannot understand WHY he should fall asleep and grow mouldy in that + fashion,” said Platon. “Why should he need continual surveillance to keep + him from degenerating into a drunkard and a good-for-nothing?” + </p> + <p> + “The cause is lack of enlightenment,” said Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Possibly—only God knows. Yet enlightenment has reached us right + enough. Do we not attend university lectures and everything else that is + befitting? Take my own education. I learnt not only the usual things, but + also the art of spending money upon the latest refinement, the latest + amenity—the art of familiarising oneself with whatsoever money can + buy. How, then, can it be said that I was educated foolishly? And my + comrades’ education was the same. A few of them succeeded in annexing the + cream of things, for the reason that they had the wit to do so, and the + rest spent their time in doing their best to ruin their health and + squander their money. Often I think there is no hope for the present-day + Russian. While desiring to do everything, he accomplishes nothing. One day + he will scheme to begin a new mode of existence, a new dietary; yet before + evening he will have so over-eaten himself as to be unable to speak or do + aught but sit staring like an owl. The same with every one.” + </p> + <p> + “Quite so,” agreed Chichikov with a smile. “’Tis everywhere the same + story.” + </p> + <p> + “To tell the truth, we are not born to common sense. I doubt whether + Russia has ever produced a really sensible man. For my own part, if I see + my neighbour living a regular life, and making money, and saving it, I + begin to distrust him, and to feel certain that in old age, if not before, + he too will be led astray by the devil—led astray in a moment. Yes, + whether or not we be educated, there is something we lack. But what that + something is passes my understanding.” + </p> + <p> + On the return journey the prospect was the same as before. Everywhere the + same slovenliness, the same disorder, was displaying itself unadorned: the + only difference being that a fresh puddle had formed in the middle of the + village street. This want and neglect was noticeable in the peasants’ + quarters equally with the quarters of the barin. In the village a furious + woman in greasy sackcloth was beating a poor young wench within an ace of + her life, and at the same time devoting some third person to the care of + all the devils in hell; further away a couple of peasants were stoically + contemplating the virago—one scratching his rump as he did so, and + the other yawning. The same yawn was discernible in the buildings, for not + a roof was there but had a gaping hole in it. As he gazed at the scene + Platon himself yawned. Patch was superimposed upon patch, and, in place of + a roof, one hut had a piece of wooden fencing, while its crumbling + window-frames were stayed with sticks purloined from the barin’s barn. + Evidently the system of upkeep in vogue was the system employed in the + case of Trishkin’s coat—the system of cutting up the cuffs and the + collar into mendings for the elbows. + </p> + <p> + “No, I do not admire your way of doing things,” was Chichikov’s unspoken + comment when the inspection had been concluded and the party had + re-entered the house. Everywhere in the latter the visitors were struck + with the way in which poverty went with glittering, fashionable profusion. + On a writing-table lay a volume of Shakespeare, and, on an occasional + table, a carved ivory back-scratcher. The hostess, too, was elegantly and + fashionably attired, and devoted her whole conversation to the town and + the local theatre. Lastly, the children—bright, merry little things—were + well-dressed both as regards boys and girls. Yet far better would it have + been for them if they had been clad in plain striped smocks, and running + about the courtyard like peasant children. Presently a visitor arrived in + the shape of a chattering, gossiping woman; whereupon the hostess carried + her off to her own portion of the house, and, the children following them, + the men found themselves alone. + </p> + <p> + “How much do you want for the property?” asked Chichikov of Khlobuev. “I + am afraid I must request you to name the lowest possible sum, since I find + the estate in a far worse condition than I had expected to do.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, it IS in a terrible state,” agreed Khlobuev. “Nor is that the whole + of the story. That is to say, I will not conceal from you the fact that, + out of a hundred souls registered at the last revision, only fifty + survive, so terrible have been the ravages of cholera. And of these, + again, some have absconded; wherefore they too must be reckoned as dead, + seeing that, were one to enter process against them, the costs would end + in the property having to pass en bloc to the legal authorities. For these + reasons I am asking only thirty-five thousand roubles for the estate.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov (it need hardly be said) started to haggle. + </p> + <p> + “Thirty-five thousand?” he cried. “Come, come! Surely you will accept + TWENTY-five thousand?” + </p> + <p> + This was too much for Platon’s conscience. + </p> + <p> + “Now, now, Paul Ivanovitch!” he exclaimed. “Take the property at the price + named, and have done with it. The estate is worth at least that amount—so + much so that, should you not be willing to give it, my brother-in-law and + I will club together to effect the purchase.” + </p> + <p> + “That being so,” said Chichikov, taken aback, “I beg to agree to the price + in question. At the same time, I must ask you to allow me to defer payment + of one-half of the purchase money until a year from now.” + </p> + <p> + “No, no, Paul Ivanovitch. Under no circumstances could I do that. Pay me + half now, and the rest in... <a href="#linknote-50" id="linknoteref-50"><small>50</small></a> You see, I need the money for + the redemption of the mortgage.” + </p> + <p> + “That places me in a difficulty,” remarked Chichikov. “Ten thousand + roubles is all that at the moment I have available.” As a matter of fact, + this was not true, seeing that, counting also the money which he had + borrowed of Kostanzhoglo, he had at his disposal TWENTY thousand. His real + reason for hesitating was that he disliked the idea of making so large a + payment in a lump sum. + </p> + <p> + “I must repeat my request, Paul Ivanovitch,” said Khlobuev, “—namely, + that you pay me at least fifteen thousand immediately.” + </p> + <p> + “The odd five thousand <i>I</i> will lend you,” put in Platon to + Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “Indeed?” exclaimed Chichikov as he reflected: “So he also lends money!” + </p> + <p> + In the end Chichikov’s dispatch-box was brought from the koliaska, and + Khlobuev received thence ten thousand roubles, together with a promise + that the remaining five thousand should be forthcoming on the morrow; + though the promise was given only after Chichikov had first proposed that + THREE thousand should be brought on the day named, and the rest be left + over for two or three days longer, if not for a still more protracted + period. The truth was that Paul Ivanovitch hated parting with money. No + matter how urgent a situation might have been, he would still have + preferred to pay a sum to-morrow rather than to-day. In other words, he + acted as we all do, for we all like keeping a petitioner waiting. “Let him + rub his back in the hall for a while,” we say. “Surely he can bide his + time a little?” Yet of the fact that every hour may be precious to the + poor wretch, and that his business may suffer from the delay, we take no + account. “Good sir,” we say, “pray come again to-morrow. To-day I have no + time to spare you.” + </p> + <p> + “Where do you intend henceforth to live?” inquired Platon. “Have you any + other property to which you can retire?” + </p> + <p> + “No,” replied Khlobuev. “I shall remove to the town, where I possess a + small villa. That would have been necessary, in any case, for the + children’s sake. You see, they must have instruction in God’s word, and + also lessons in music and dancing; and not for love or money can these + things be procured in the country. + </p> + <p> + “Nothing to eat, yet dancing lessons for his children!” reflected + Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “An extraordinary man!” was Platon’s unspoken comment. + </p> + <p> + “However, we must contrive to wet our bargain somehow,” continued + Khlobuev. “Hi, Kirushka! Bring that bottle of champagne.” + </p> + <p> + “Nothing to eat, yet champagne to drink!” reflected Chichikov. As for + Platon, he did not know WHAT to think. + </p> + <p> + In Khlobuev’s eyes it was de rigueur that he should provide a guest with + champagne; but, though he had sent to the town for some, he had been met + with a blank refusal to forward even a bottle of kvass on credit. Only the + discovery of a French dealer who had recently transferred his business + from St. Petersburg, and opened a connection on a system of general + credit, saved the situation by placing Khlobuev under the obligation of + patronising him. + </p> + <p> + The company drank three glassfuls apiece, and so grew more cheerful. In + particular did Khlobuev expand, and wax full of civility and friendliness, + and scatter witticisms and anecdotes to right and left. What knowledge of + men and the world did his utterances display! How well and accurately + could he divine things! With what appositeness did he sketch the + neighbouring landowners! How clearly he exposed their faults and failings! + How thoroughly he knew the story of certain ruined gentry—the story + of how, why, and through what cause they had fallen upon evil days! With + what comic originality could he describe their little habits and customs! + </p> + <p> + In short, his guests found themselves charmed with his discourse, and felt + inclined to vote him a man of first-rate intellect. + </p> + <p> + “What most surprises me,” said Chichikov, “is how, in view of your + ability, you come to be so destitute of means or resources.” + </p> + <p> + “But I have plenty of both,” said Khlobuev, and with that went on to + deliver himself of a perfect avalanche of projects. Yet those projects + proved to be so uncouth, so clumsy, so little the outcome of a knowledge + of men and things, that his hearers could only shrug their shoulders and + mentally exclaim: “Good Lord! What a difference between worldly wisdom and + the capacity to use it!” In every case the projects in question were based + upon the imperative necessity of at once procuring from somewhere two + hundred—or at least one hundred—thousand roubles. That done + (so Khlobuev averred), everything would fall into its proper place, the + holes in his pockets would become stopped, his income would be quadrupled, + and he would find himself in a position to liquidate his debts in full. + Nevertheless he ended by saying: “What would you advise me to do? I fear + that the philanthropist who would lend me two hundred thousand roubles or + even a hundred thousand, does not exist. It is not God’s will that he + should.” + </p> + <p> + “Good gracious!” inwardly ejaculated Chichikov. “To suppose that God would + send such a fool two hundred thousand roubles!” + </p> + <p> + “However,” went on Khlobuev, “I possess an aunt worth three millions—a + pious old woman who gives freely to churches and monasteries, but finds a + difficulty in helping her neighbour. At the same time, she is a lady of + the old school, and worth having a peep at. Her canaries alone number four + hundred, and, in addition, there is an army of pug-dogs, hangers-on, and + servants. Even the youngest of the servants is sixty, but she calls them + all ‘young fellows,’ and if a guest happens to offend her during dinner, + she orders them to leave him out when handing out the dishes. THERE’S a + woman for you!” + </p> + <p> + Platon laughed. + </p> + <p> + “And what may her family name be?” asked Chichikov. “And where does she + live?” + </p> + <p> + “She lives in the county town, and her name is Alexandra Ivanovna + Khanasarov.” + </p> + <p> + “Then why do you not apply to her?” asked Platon earnestly. “It seems to + me that, once she realised the position of your family, she could not + possibly refuse you.” + </p> + <p> + “Alas! nothing is to be looked for from that quarter,” replied Khlobuev. + “My aunt is of a very stubborn disposition—a perfect stone of a + woman. Moreover, she has around her a sufficient band of favourites + already. In particular is there a fellow who is aiming for a Governorship, + and to that end has managed to insinuate himself into the circle of her + kinsfolk. By the way,” the speaker added, turning to Platon, “would you do + me a favour? Next week I am giving a dinner to the associated guilds of + the town.” + </p> + <p> + Platon stared. He had been unaware that both in our capitals and in our + provincial towns there exists a class of men whose lives are an enigma—men + who, though they will seem to have exhausted their substance, and to have + become enmeshed in debt, will suddenly be reported as in funds, and on the + point of giving a dinner! And though, at this dinner, the guests will + declare that the festival is bound to be their host’s last fling, and that + for a certainty he will be haled to prison on the morrow, ten years or + more will elapse, and the rascal will still be at liberty, even though, in + the meanwhile, his debts will have increased! + </p> + <p> + In the same way did the conduct of Khlobuev’s menage afford a curious + phenomenon, for one day the house would be the scene of a solemn Te Deum, + performed by a priest in vestments, and the next of a stage play performed + by a troupe of French actors in theatrical costume. Again, one day would + see not a morsel of bread in the house, and the next day a banquet and + generous largesse given to a party of artists and sculptors. During these + seasons of scarcity (sufficiently severe to have led any one but Khlobuev + to seek suicide by hanging or shooting), the master of the house would be + preserved from rash action by his strongly religious disposition, which, + contriving in some curious way to conform with his irregular mode of life, + enabled him to fall back upon reading the lives of saints, ascetics, and + others of the type which has risen superior to its misfortunes. And at + such times his spirit would become softened, his thoughts full of + gentleness, and his eyes wet with tears; he would fall to saying his + prayers, and invariably some strange coincidence would bring an answer + thereto in the shape of an unexpected measure of assistance. That is to + say, some former friend of his would remember him, and send him a trifle + in the way of money; or else some female visitor would be moved by his + story to let her impulsive, generous heart proffer him a handsome gift; or + else a suit whereof tidings had never even reached his ears would end by + being decided in his favour. And when that happened he would reverently + acknowledge the immensity of the mercy of Providence, gratefully tender + thanksgiving for the same, and betake himself again to his irregular mode + of existence. + </p> + <p> + “Somehow I feel sorry for the man,” said Platon when he and Chichikov had + taken leave of their host, and left the house. + </p> + <p> + “Perhaps so, but he is a hopeless prodigal,” replied the other. + “Personally I find it impossible to compassionate such fellows.” + </p> + <p> + And with that the pair ceased to devote another thought to Khlobuev. In + the case of Platon, this was because he contemplated the fortunes of his + fellows with the lethargic, half-somnolent eye which he turned upon all + the rest of the world; for though the sight of distress of others would + cause his heart to contract and feel full of sympathy, the impression thus + produced never sank into the depths of his being. Accordingly, before many + minutes were over he had ceased to bestow a single thought upon his late + host. With Chichikov, however, things were different. Whereas Platon had + ceased to think of Khlobuev no more than he had ceased to think of + himself, Chichikov’s mind had strayed elsewhere, for the reason that it + had become taken up with grave meditation on the subject of the purchase + just made. Suddenly finding himself no longer a fictitious proprietor, but + the owner of a real, an actually existing, estate, he became + contemplative, and his plans and ideas assumed such a serious vein as + imparted to his features an unconsciously important air. + </p> + <p> + “Patience and hard work!” he muttered to himself. “The thing will not be + difficult, for with those two requisites I have been familiar from the + days of my swaddling clothes. Yes, no novelty will they be to me. Yet, in + middle age, shall I be able to compass the patience whereof I was capable + in my youth?” + </p> + <p> + However, no matter how he regarded the future, and no matter from what + point of view he considered his recent acquisition, he could see nothing + but advantage likely to accrue from the bargain. For one thing, he might + be able to proceed so that, first the whole of the estate should be + mortgaged, and then the better portions of land sold outright. Or he might + so contrive matters as to manage the property for a while (and thus become + a landowner like Kostanzhoglo, whose advice, as his neighbour and his + benefactor, he intended always to follow), and then to dispose of the + property by private treaty (provided he did not wish to continue his + ownership), and still to retain in his hands the dead and abandoned souls. + And another possible coup occurred to his mind. That is to say, he might + contrive to withdraw from the district without having repaid Kostanzhoglo + at all! Truly a splendid idea! Yet it is only fair to say that the idea + was not one of Chichikov’s own conception. Rather, it had presented itself—mocking, + laughing, and winking—unbidden. Yet the impudent, the wanton thing! + Who is the procreator of suddenly born ideas of the kind? The thought that + he was now a real, an actual, proprietor instead of a fictitious—that + he was now a proprietor of real land, real rights of timber and pasture, + and real serfs who existed not only in the imagination, but also in + veritable actuality—greatly elated our hero. So he took to dancing + up and down in his seat, to rubbing his hands together, to winking at + himself, to holding his fist, trumpet-wise, to his mouth (while making + believe to execute a march), and even to uttering aloud such encouraging + nicknames and phrases as “bulldog” and “little fat capon.” Then suddenly + recollecting that he was not alone, he hastened to moderate his behaviour + and endeavoured to stifle the endless flow of his good spirits; with the + result that when Platon, mistaking certain sounds for utterances addressed + to himself, inquired what his companion had said, the latter retained the + presence of mind to reply “Nothing.” + </p> + <p> + Presently, as Chichikov gazed about him, he saw that for some time past + the koliaska had been skirting a beautiful wood, and that on either side + the road was bordered with an edging of birch trees, the tenderly-green, + recently-opened leaves of which caused their tall, slender trunks to show + up with the whiteness of a snowdrift. Likewise nightingales were warbling + from the recesses of the foliage, and some wood tulips were glowing yellow + in the grass. Next (and almost before Chichikov had realised how he came + to be in such a beautiful spot when, but a moment before, there had been + visible only open fields) there glimmered among the trees the stony + whiteness of a church, with, on the further side of it, the intermittent, + foliage-buried line of a fence; while from the upper end of a village + street there was advancing to meet the vehicle a gentleman with a cap on + his head, a knotted cudgel in his hands, and a slender-limbed English dog + by his side. + </p> + <p> + “This is my brother,” said Platon. “Stop, coachman.” And he descended from + the koliaska, while Chichikov followed his example. Yarb and the strange + dog saluted one another, and then the active, thin-legged, slender-tongued + Azor relinquished his licking of Yarb’s blunt jowl, licked Platon’s hands + instead, and, leaping upon Chichikov, slobbered right into his ear. + </p> + <p> + The two brothers embraced. + </p> + <p> + “Really, Platon,” said the gentleman (whose name was Vassili), “what do + you mean by treating me like this?” + </p> + <p> + “How so?” said Platon indifferently. + </p> + <p> + “What? For three days past I have seen and heard nothing of you! A groom + from Pietukh’s brought your cob home, and told me you had departed on an + expedition with some barin. At least you might have sent me word as to + your destination and the probable length of your absence. What made you + act so? God knows what I have not been wondering!” + </p> + <p> + “Does it matter?” rejoined Platon. “I forgot to send you word, and we have + been no further than Constantine’s (who, with our sister, sends you his + greeting). By the way, may I introduce Paul Ivanovitch Chichikov?” + </p> + <p> + The pair shook hands with one another. Then, doffing their caps, they + embraced. + </p> + <p> + “What sort of man is this Chichikov?” thought Vassili. “As a rule my + brother Platon is not over-nice in his choice of acquaintances.” And, + eyeing our hero as narrowly as civility permitted, he saw that his + appearance was that of a perfectly respectable individual. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov returned Vassili’s scrutiny with a similar observance of the + dictates of civility, and perceived that he was shorter than Platon, that + his hair was of a darker shade, and that his features, though less + handsome, contained far more life, animation, and kindliness than did his + brother’s. Clearly he indulged in less dreaming, though that was an aspect + which Chichikov little regarded. + </p> + <p> + “I have made up my mind to go touring our Holy Russia with Paul + Ivanovitch,” said Platon. “Perhaps it will rid me of my melancholy.” + </p> + <p> + “What has made you come to such a sudden decision?” asked the perplexed + Vassili (very nearly he added: “Fancy going travelling with a man whose + acquaintance you have just made, and who may turn out to be a rascal or + the devil knows what!” But, in spite of his distrust, he contented himself + with another covert scrutiny of Chichikov, and this time came to the + conclusion that there was no fault to be found with his exterior). + </p> + <p> + The party turned to the right, and entered the gates of an ancient + courtyard attached to an old-fashioned house of a type no longer built—the + type which has huge gables supporting a high-pitched roof. In the centre + of the courtyard two great lime trees covered half the surrounding space + with shade, while beneath them were ranged a number of wooden benches, and + the whole was encircled with a ring of blossoming lilacs and cherry trees + which, like a beaded necklace, reinforced the wooden fence, and almost + buried it beneath their clusters of leaves and flowers. The house, too, + stood almost concealed by this greenery, except that the front door and + the windows peered pleasantly through the foliage, and that here and there + between the stems of the trees there could be caught glimpses of the + kitchen regions, the storehouses, and the cellar. Lastly, around the whole + stood a grove, from the recesses of which came the echoing songs of + nightingales. + </p> + <p> + Involuntarily the place communicated to the soul a sort of quiet, restful + feeling, so eloquently did it speak of that care-free period when every + one lived on good terms with his neighbour, and all was simple and + unsophisticated. Vassili invited Chichikov to seat himself, and the party + approached, for that purpose, the benches under the lime trees; after + which a youth of about seventeen, and clad in a red shirt, brought + decanters containing various kinds of kvass (some of them as thick as + syrup, and others hissing like aerated lemonade), deposited the same upon + the table, and, taking up a spade which he had left leaning against a + tree, moved away towards the garden. The reason of this was that in the + brothers’ household, as in that of Kostanzhoglo, no servants were kept, + since the whole staff were rated as gardeners, and performed that duty in + rotation—Vassili holding that domestic service was not a specialised + calling, but one to which any one might contribute a hand, and therefore + one which did not require special menials to be kept for the purpose. + Moreover, he held that the average Russian peasant remains active and + willing (rather than lazy) only so long as he wears a shirt and a + peasant’s smock; but that as soon as ever he finds himself put into a + German tailcoat, he becomes awkward, sluggish, indolent, disinclined to + change his vest or take a bath, fond of sleeping in his clothes, and + certain to breed fleas and bugs under the German apparel. And it may be + that Vassili was right. At all events, the brothers’ peasantry were + exceedingly well clad—the women, in particular, having their + head-dresses spangled with gold, and the sleeves of their blouses + embroidered after the fashion of a Turkish shawl. + </p> + <p> + “You see here the species of kvass for which our house has long been + famous,” said Vassili to Chichikov. The latter poured himself out a + glassful from the first decanter which he lighted upon, and found the + contents to be linden honey of a kind never tasted by him even in Poland, + seeing that it had a sparkle like that of champagne, and also an + effervescence which sent a pleasant spray from the mouth into the nose. + </p> + <p> + “Nectar!” he proclaimed. Then he took some from a second decanter. It + proved to be even better than the first. “A beverage of beverages!” he + exclaimed. “At your respected brother-in-law’s I tasted the finest syrup + which has ever come my way, but here I have tasted the very finest kvass.” + </p> + <p> + “Yet the recipe for the syrup also came from here,” said Vassili, “seeing + that my sister took it with her. By the way, to what part of the country, + and to what places, are you thinking of travelling?” + </p> + <p> + “To tell the truth,” replied Chichikov, rocking himself to and fro on the + bench, and smoothing his knee with his hand, and gently inclining his + head, “I am travelling less on my own affairs than on the affairs of + others. That is to say, General Betristchev, an intimate friend, and, I + might add, a generous benefactor of mine, has charged me with commissions + to some of his relatives. Nevertheless, though relatives are relatives, I + may say that I am travelling on my own account as well, in that, in + addition to possible benefit to my health, I desire to see the world and + the whirligig of humanity, which constitute, to so speak, a living book, a + second course of education.” + </p> + <p> + Vassili took thought. “The man speaks floridly,” he reflected, “yet his + words contain a certain element of truth.” After a moment’s silence he + added to Platon: “I am beginning to think that the tour might help you to + bestir yourself. At present you are in a condition of mental slumber. You + have fallen asleep, not so much from weariness or satiety, as through a + lack of vivid perceptions and impressions. For myself, I am your complete + antithesis. I should be only too glad if I could feel less acutely, if I + could take things less to heart.” + </p> + <p> + “Emotion has become a disease with you,” said Platon. “You seek your own + troubles, and make your own anxieties.” + </p> + <p> + “How can you say that when ready-made anxieties greet one at every step?” + exclaimed Vassili. “For example, have you heard of the trick which + Lienitsin has just played us—of his seizing the piece of vacant land + whither our peasants resort for their sports? That piece I would not sell + for all the money in the world. It has long been our peasants’ + play-ground, and all the traditions of our village are bound up with it. + Moreover, for me, old custom is a sacred thing for which I would gladly + sacrifice everything else.” + </p> + <p> + “Lienitsin cannot have known of this, or he would not have seized the + land,” said Platon. “He is a newcomer, just arrived from St. Petersburg. A + few words of explanation ought to meet the case.” + </p> + <p> + “But he DOES know of what I have stated; he DOES know of it. Purposely I + sent him word to that affect, yet he has returned me the rudest of + answers.” + </p> + <p> + “Then go yourself and explain matters to him.” + </p> + <p> + “No, I will not do that; he has tried to carry off things with too high a + hand. But YOU can go if you like.” + </p> + <p> + “I would certainly go were it not that I scarcely like to interfere. Also, + I am a man whom he could easily hoodwink and outwit.” + </p> + <p> + “Would it help you if <i>I</i> were to go?” put in Chichikov. “Pray + enlighten me as to the matter.” + </p> + <p> + Vassili glanced at the speaker, and thought to himself: “What a passion + the man has for travelling!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, pray give me an idea of the kind of fellow,” repeated Chichikov, + “and also outline to me the affair.” + </p> + <p> + “I should be ashamed to trouble you with such an unpleasant commission,” + replied Vassili. “He is a man whom I take to be an utter rascal. + Originally a member of a family of plain dvoriane in this province, he + entered the Civil Service in St. Petersburg, then married some one’s + natural daughter in that city, and has returned to lord it with a high + hand. I cannot bear the tone he adopts. Our folk are by no means fools. + They do not look upon the current fashion as the Tsar’s ukaz any more than + they look upon St. Petersburg as the Church.” + </p> + <p> + “Naturally,” said Chichikov. “But tell me more of the particulars of the + quarrel.” + </p> + <p> + “They are these. He needs additional land and, had he not acted as he has + done, I would have given him some land elsewhere for nothing; but, as it + is, the pestilent fellow has taken it into his head to—” + </p> + <p> + “I think I had better go and have a talk with him. That might settle the + affair. Several times have people charged me with similar commissions, and + never have they repented of it. General Betristchev is an example.” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless I am ashamed that you should be put to the annoyance of + having to converse with such a fellow.” + </p> +<p class="center p2"> + [At this point there occurs a long hiatus.] +</p> + <p> + “And above all things, such a transaction would need to be carried through + in secret,” said Chichikov. “True, the law does not forbid such things, + but there is always the risk of a scandal.” + </p> + <p> + “Quite so, quite so,” said Lienitsin with head bent down. + </p> + <p> + “Then we agree!” exclaimed Chichikov. “How charming! As I say, my business + is both legal and illegal. Though needing to effect a mortgage, I desire + to put no one to the risk of having to pay the two roubles on each living + soul; wherefore I have conceived the idea of relieving landowners of that + distasteful obligation by acquiring dead and absconded souls who have + failed to disappear from the revision list. This enables me at once to + perform an act of Christian charity and to remove from the shoulders of + our more impoverished proprietors the burden of tax-payment upon souls of + the kind specified. Should you yourself care to do business with me, we + will draw up a formal purchase agreement as though the souls in question + were still alive.” + </p> + <p> + “But it would be such a curious arrangement,” muttered Lienitsin, moving + his chair and himself a little further away. “It would be an arrangement + which, er—er—” + </p> + <p> + “Would involve you in no scandal whatever, seeing that the affair would be + carried through in secret. Moreover, between friends who are well-disposed + towards one another—” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless—” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov adopted a firmer and more decided tone. “I repeat that there + would be no scandal,” he said. “The transaction would take place as + between good friends, and as between friends of mature age, and as between + friends of good status, and as between friends who know how to keep their + own counsel.” And, so saying, he looked his interlocutor frankly and + generously in the eyes. + </p> + <p> + Nevertheless Lienitsin’s resourcefulness and acumen in business matters + failed to relieve his mind of a certain perplexity—and the less so + since he had contrived to become caught in his own net. Yet, in general, + he possessed neither a love for nor a talent for underhand dealings, and, + had not fate and circumstances favoured Chichikov by causing Lienitsin’s + wife to enter the room at that moment, things might have turned out very + differently from what they did. Madame was a pale, thin, + insignificant-looking young lady, but none the less a lady who wore her + clothes a la St. Petersburg, and cultivated the society of persons who + were unimpeachably comme il faut. Behind her, borne in a nurse’s arms, + came the first fruits of the love of husband and wife. Adopting his most + telling method of approach (the method accompanied with a sidelong + inclination of the head and a sort of hop), Chichikov hastened to greet + the lady from the metropolis, and then the baby. At first the latter + started to bellow disapproval, but the words “Agoo, agoo, my pet!” added + to a little cracking of the fingers and a sight of a beautiful seal on a + watch chain, enabled Chichikov to weedle the infant into his arms; after + which he fell to swinging it up and down until he had contrived to raise a + smile on its face—a circumstance which greatly delighted the + parents, and finally inclined the father in his visitor’s favour. + Suddenly, however—whether from pleasure or from some other cause—the + infant misbehaved itself! + </p> + <p> + “My God!” cried Madame. “He has gone and spoilt your frockcoat!” + </p> + <p> + True enough, on glancing downwards, Chichikov saw that the sleeve of his + brand-new garment had indeed suffered a hurt. “If I could catch you alone, + you little devil,” he muttered to himself, “I’d shoot you!” + </p> + <p> + Host, hostess and nurse all ran for eau-de-Cologne, and from three sides + set themselves to rub the spot affected. + </p> + <p> + “Never mind, never mind; it is nothing,” said Chichikov as he strove to + communicate to his features as cheerful an expression as possible. “What + does it matter what a child may spoil during the golden age of its + infancy?” + </p> + <p> + To himself he remarked: “The little brute! Would it could be devoured by + wolves. It has made only too good a shot, the cussed young ragamuffin!” + </p> + <p> + How, after this—after the guest had shown such innocent affection + for the little one, and magnanimously paid for his so doing with a + brand-new suit—could the father remain obdurate? Nevertheless, to + avoid setting a bad example to the countryside, he and Chichikov agreed to + carry through the transaction PRIVATELY, lest, otherwise, a scandal should + arise. + </p> + <p> + “In return,” said Chichikov, “would you mind doing me the following + favour? I desire to mediate in the matter of your difference with the + Brothers Platonov. I believe that you wish to acquire some additional + land? Is not that so?” + </p> +<p class="center p2"> + [Here there occurs a hiatus in the original.] +</p> + <p> + Everything in life fulfils its function, and Chichikov’s tour in search of + a fortune was carried out so successfully that not a little money passed + into his pockets. The system employed was a good one: he did not steal, he + merely used. And every one of us at times does the same: one man with + regard to Government timber, and another with regard to a sum belonging to + his employer, while a third defrauds his children for the sake of an + actress, and a fourth robs his peasantry for the sake of smart furniture + or a carriage. What can one do when one is surrounded on every side with + roguery, and everywhere there are insanely expensive restaurants, masked + balls, and dances to the music of gipsy bands? To abstain when every one + else is indulging in these things, and fashion commands, is difficult + indeed! + </p> + <p> + Chichikov was for setting forth again, but the roads had now got into a + bad state, and, in addition, there was in preparation a second fair—one + for the dvoriane only. The former fair had been held for the sale of + horses, cattle, cheese, and other peasant produce, and the buyers had been + merely cattle-jobbers and kulaks; but this time the function was to be one + for the sale of manorial produce which had been bought up by wholesale + dealers at Nizhni Novgorod, and then transferred hither. To the fair, of + course, came those ravishers of the Russian purse who, in the shape of + Frenchmen with pomades and Frenchwomen with hats, make away with money + earned by blood and hard work, and, like the locusts of Egypt (to use + Kostanzhoglo’s term) not only devour their prey, but also dig holes in the + ground and leave behind their eggs. + </p> + <p> + Although, unfortunately, the occurrence of a bad harvest retained many + landowners at their country houses, the local tchinovniks (whom the + failure of the harvest did NOT touch) proceeded to let themselves go—as + also, to their undoing, did their wives. The reading of books of the type + diffused, in these modern days, for the inoculation of humanity with a + craving for new and superior amenities of life had caused every one to + conceive a passion for experimenting with the latest luxury; and to meet + this want the French wine merchant opened a new establishment in the shape + of a restaurant as had never before been heard of in the province—a + restaurant where supper could be procured on credit as regarded one-half, + and for an unprecedentedly low sum as regarded the other. This exactly + suited both heads of boards and clerks who were living in hope of being + able some day to resume their bribes-taking from suitors. There also + developed a tendency to compete in the matter of horses and liveried + flunkeys; with the result that despite the damp and snowy weather + exceedingly elegant turnouts took to parading backwards and forwards. + Whence these equipages had come God only knows, but at least they would + not have disgraced St. Petersburg. From within them merchants and + attorneys doffed their caps to ladies, and inquired after their health, + and likewise it became a rare sight to see a bearded man in a rough fur + cap, since every one now went about clean-shaven and with dirty teeth, + after the European fashion. + </p> + <p> + “Sir, I beg of you to inspect my goods,” said a tradesman as Chichikov was + passing his establishment. “Within my doors you will find a large variety + of clothing.” + </p> + <p> + “Have you a cloth of bilberry-coloured check?” inquired the person + addressed. + </p> + <p> + “I have cloths of the finest kind,” replied the tradesman, raising his cap + with one hand, and pointing to his shop with the other. Chichikov entered, + and in a trice the proprietor had dived beneath the counter, and appeared + on the other side of it, with his back to his wares and his face towards + the customer. Leaning forward on the tips of his fingers, and indicating + his merchandise with just the suspicion of a nod, he requested the + gentleman to specify exactly the species of cloth which he required. + </p> + <p> + “A cloth with an olive-coloured or a bottle-tinted spot in its pattern—anything + in the nature of bilberry,” explained Chichikov. + </p> + <p> + “That being so, sir, I may say that I am about to show you clothes of a + quality which even our illustrious capitals could not surpass. Hi, boy! + Reach down that roll up there—number 34. No, NOT that one, fool! + Such fellows as you are always too good for your job. There—hand it + to me. This is indeed a nice pattern!” + </p> + <p> + Unfolding the garment, the tradesman thrust it close to Chichikov’s nose + in order that he might not only handle, but also smell it. + </p> + <p> + “Excellent, but not what I want,” pronounced Chichikov. “Formerly I was in + the Custom’s Department, and therefore wear none but cloth of the latest + make. What I want is of a ruddier pattern than this—not exactly a + bottle-tinted pattern, but something approaching bilberry.” + </p> + <p> + “I understand, sir. Of course you require only the very newest thing. A + cloth of that kind I DO possess, sir, and though excessive in price, it is + of a quality to match.” + </p> + <p> + Carrying the roll of stuff to the light—even stepping into the + street for the purpose—the shopman unfolded his prize with the + words, “A truly beautiful shade! A cloth of smoked grey, shot with flame + colour!” + </p> + <p> + The material met with the customer’s approval, a price was agreed upon, + and with incredible celerity the vendor made up the purchase into a + brown-paper parcel, and stowed it away in Chichikov’s koliaska. + </p> + <p> + At this moment a voice asked to be shown a black frockcoat. + </p> + <p> + “The devil take me if it isn’t Khlobuev!” muttered our hero, turning his + back upon the newcomer. Unfortunately the other had seen him. + </p> + <p> + “Come, come, Paul Ivanovitch!” he expostulated. “Surely you do not intend + to overlook me? I have been searching for you everywhere, for I have + something important to say to you.” + </p> + <p> + “My dear sir, my very dear sir,” said Chichikov as he pressed Khlobuev’s + hand, “I can assure you that, had I the necessary leisure, I should at all + times be charmed to converse with you.” And mentally he added: “Would that + the Evil One would fly away with you!” + </p> + <p> + Almost at the same time Murazov, the great landowner, entered the shop. As + he did so our hero hastened to exclaim: “Why, it is Athanasi + Vassilievitch! How ARE you, my very dear sir?” + </p> + <p> + “Well enough,” replied Murazov, removing his cap (Khlobuev and the shopman + had already done the same). “How, may I ask, are YOU?” + </p> + <p> + “But poorly,” replied Chichikov, “for of late I have been troubled with + indigestion, and my sleep is bad. I do not get sufficient exercise.” + </p> + <p> + However, instead of probing deeper into the subject of Chichikov’s + ailments, Murazov turned to Khlobuev. + </p> + <p> + “I saw you enter the shop,” he said, “and therefore followed you, for I + have something important for your ear. Could you spare me a minute or + two?” + </p> + <p> + “Certainly, certainly,” said Khlobuev, and the pair left the shop + together. + </p> + <p> + “I wonder what is afoot between them,” said Chichikov to himself. + </p> + <p> + “A wise and noble gentleman, Athanasi Vassilievitch!” remarked the + tradesman. Chichikov made no reply save a gesture. + </p> + <p> + “Paul Ivanovitch, I have been looking for you everywhere,” Lienitsin’s + voice said from behind him, while again the tradesman hastened to remove + his cap. “Pray come home with me, for I have something to say to you.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov scanned the speaker’s face, but could make nothing of it. Paying + the tradesman for the cloth, he left the shop. + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile Murazov had conveyed Khlobuev to his rooms. + </p> + <p> + “Tell me,” he said to his guest, “exactly how your affairs stand. I take + it that, after all, your aunt left you something?” + </p> + <p> + “It would be difficult to say whether or not my affairs are improved,” + replied Khlobuev. “True, fifty souls and thirty thousand roubles came to + me from Madame Khanasarova, but I had to pay them away to satisfy my + debts. Consequently I am once more destitute. But the important point is + that there was trickery connected with the legacy, and shameful trickery + at that. Yes, though it may surprise you, it is a fact that that fellow + Chichikov—” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, Semen Semenovitch, but, before you go on to speak of Chichikov, pray + tell me something about yourself, and how much, in your opinion, would be + sufficient to clear you of your difficulties?” + </p> + <p> + “My difficulties are grievous,” replied Khlobuev. “To rid myself of them, + and also to have enough to go on with, I should need to acquire at least a + hundred thousand roubles, if not more. In short, things are becoming + impossible for me.” + </p> + <p> + “And, had you the money, what should you do with it?” + </p> + <p> + “I should rent a tenement, and devote myself to the education of my + children. Not a thought should I give to myself, for my career is over, + seeing that it is impossible for me to re-enter the Civil Service and I am + good for nothing else.” + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless, when a man is leading an idle life he is apt to incur + temptations which shun his better-employed brother.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but beyond question I am good for nothing, so broken is my health, + and such a martyr I am to dyspepsia.” + </p> + <p> + “But how do you propose to live without working? How can a man like you + exist without a post or a position of any kind? Look around you at the + works of God. Everything has its proper function, and pursues its proper + course. Even a stone can be used for one purpose or another. How, then, + can it be right for a man who is a thinking being to remain a drone?” + </p> + <p> + “But I should not be a drone, for I should employ myself with the + education of my children.” + </p> + <p> + “No, Semen Semenovitch—no: THAT you would find the hardest task of + all. For how can a man educate his children who has never even educated + himself? Instruction can be imparted to children only through the medium + of example; and would a life like yours furnish them with a profitable + example—a life which has been spent in idleness and the playing of + cards? No, Semen Semenovitch. You had far better hand your children over + to me. Otherwise they will be ruined. Do not think that I am jesting. + Idleness has wrecked your life, and you must flee from it. Can a man live + with nothing to keep him in place? Even a journeyman labourer who earns + the barest pittance may take an interest in his occupation.” + </p> + <p> + “Athanasi Vassilievitch, I have tried to overcome myself, but what further + resource lies open to me? Can I who am old and incapable re-enter the + Civil Service and spend year after year at a desk with youths who are just + starting their careers? Moreover, I have lost the trick of taking bribes; + I should only hinder both myself and others; while, as you know, it is a + department which has an established caste of its own. Therefore, though I + have considered, and even attempted to obtain, every conceivable post, I + find myself incompetent for them all. Only in a monastery should I—” + </p> + <p> + “Nay, nay. Monasteries, again, are only for those who have worked. To + those who have spent their youth in dissipation such havens say what the + ant said to the dragonfly—namely, ‘Go you away, and return to your + dancing.’ Yes, even in a monastery do folk toil and toil—they do not + sit playing whist.” Murazov looked at Khlobuev, and added: “Semen + Semenovitch, you are deceiving both yourself and me.” + </p> + <p> + Poor Khlobuev could not utter a word in reply, and Murazov began to feel + sorry for him. + </p> + <p> + “Listen, Semen Semenovitch,” he went on. “I know that you say your + prayers, and that you go to church, and that you observe both Matins and + Vespers, and that, though averse to early rising, you leave your bed at + four o’clock in the morning before the household fires have been lit.” + </p> + <p> + “Ah, Athanasi Vassilievitch,” said Khlobuev, “that is another matter + altogether. That I do, not for man’s sake, but for the sake of Him who has + ordered all things here on earth. Yes, I believe that He at least can feel + compassion for me, that He at least, though I be foul and lowly, will + pardon me and receive me when all men have cast me out, and my best friend + has betrayed me and boasted that he has done it for a good end.” + </p> + <p> + Khlobuev’s face was glowing with emotion, and from the older man’s eyes + also a tear had started. + </p> + <p> + “You will do well to hearken unto Him who is merciful,” he said. “But + remember also that, in the eyes of the All-Merciful, honest toil is of + equal merit with a prayer. Therefore take unto yourself whatsoever task + you may, and do it as though you were doing it, not unto man, but unto + God. Even though to your lot there should fall but the cleaning of a + floor, clean that floor as though it were being cleaned for Him alone. And + thence at least this good you will reap: that there will remain to you no + time for what is evil—for card playing, for feasting, for all the + life of this gay world. Are you acquainted with Ivan Potapitch?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, not only am I acquainted with him, but I also greatly respect him.” + </p> + <p> + “Time was when Ivan Potapitch was a merchant worth half a million roubles. + In everything did he look but for gain, and his affairs prospered + exceedingly, so much so that he was able to send his son to be educated in + France, and to marry his daughter to a General. And whether in his office + or at the Exchange, he would stop any friend whom he encountered and carry + him off to a tavern to drink, and spend whole days thus employed. But at + last he became bankrupt, and God sent him other misfortunes also. His son! + Ah, well! Ivan Potapitch is now my steward, for he had to begin life over + again. Yet once more his affairs are in order, and, had it been his wish, + he could have restarted in business with a capital of half a million + roubles. ‘But no,’ he said. ‘A steward am I, and a steward will I remain + to the end; for, from being full-stomached and heavy with dropsy, I have + become strong and well.’ Not a drop of liquor passes his lips, but only + cabbage soup and gruel. And he prays as none of the rest of us pray, and + he helps the poor as none of the rest of us help them; and to this he + would add yet further charity if his means permitted him to do so.” + </p> + <p> + Poor Khlobuev remained silent, as before. + </p> + <p> + The elder man took his two hands in his. + </p> + <p> + “Semen Semenovitch,” he said, “you cannot think how much I pity you, or + how much I have had you in my thoughts. Listen to me. In the monastery + there is a recluse who never looks upon a human face. Of all men whom I + know he has the broadest mind, and he breaks not his silence save to give + advice. To him I went and said that I had a friend (though I did not + actually mention your name) who was in great trouble of soul. Suddenly the + recluse interrupted me with the words: ‘God’s work first, and our own + last. There is need for a church to be built, but no money wherewith to + build it. Money must be collected to that end.’ Then he shut to the + wicket. I wondered to myself what this could mean, and concluded that the + recluse had been unwilling to accord me his counsel. Next I repaired to + the Archimandrite, and had scarce reached his door when he inquired of me + whether I could commend to him a man meet to be entrusted with the + collection of alms for a church—a man who should belong to the + dvoriane or to the more lettered merchants, but who would guard the trust + as he would guard the salvation of his soul. On the instant thought I to + myself: ‘Why should not the Holy Father appoint my friend Semen + Semenovitch? For the way of suffering would benefit him greatly; and as he + passed with his ledger from landowner to peasant, and from peasant to + townsman, he would learn where folk dwell, and who stands in need of + aught, and thus would become better acquainted with the countryside than + folk who dwell in cities. And, thus become, he would find that his + services were always in demand.’ Only of late did the Governor-General say + to me that, could he but be furnished with the name of a secretary who + should know his work not only by the book but also by experience, he would + give him a great sum, since nothing is to be learned by the former means, + and, through it, much confusion arises.” + </p> + <p> + “You confound me, you overwhelm me!” said Khlobuev, staring at his + companion in open-eyed astonishment. “I can scarcely believe that your + words are true, seeing that for such a trust an active, indefatigable man + would be necessary. Moreover, how could I leave my wife and children + unprovided for?” + </p> + <p> + “Have no fear,” said Murazov, “I myself will take them under my care, as + well as procure for the children a tutor. Far better and nobler were it + for you to be travelling with a wallet, and asking alms on behalf of God, + then to be remaining here and asking alms for yourself alone. Likewise, I + will furnish you with a tilt-waggon, so that you may be saved some of the + hardships of the journey, and thus be preserved in good health. Also, I + will give you some money for the journey, in order that, as you pass on + your way, you may give to those who stand in greater need than their + fellows. Thus, if, before giving, you assure yourself that the recipient + of the alms is worthy of the same, you will do much good; and as you + travel you will become acquainted with all men and sundry, and they will + treat you, not as a tchinovnik to be feared, but as one to whom, as a + petitioner on behalf of the Church, they may unloose their tongues without + peril.” + </p> + <p> + “I feel that the scheme is a splendid one, and would gladly bear my part + in it were it not likely to exceed my strength.” + </p> + <p> + “What is there that does NOT exceed your strength?” said Murazov. “Nothing + is wholly proportionate to it—everything surpasses it. Help from + above is necessary: otherwise we are all powerless. Strength comes of + prayer, and of prayer alone. When a man crosses himself, and cries, ‘Lord, + have mercy upon me!’ he soon stems the current and wins to the shore. Nor + need you take any prolonged thought concerning this matter. All that you + need do is to accept it as a commission sent of God. The tilt-waggon can + be prepared for you immediately; and then, as soon as you have been to the + Archimandrite for your book of accounts and his blessing, you will be free + to start on your journey.” + </p> + <p> + “I submit myself to you, and accept the commission as a divine trust.” + </p> + <p> + And even as Khlobuev spoke he felt renewed vigour and confidence arise in + his soul, and his mind begin to awake to a sense of hopefulness of + eventually being able to put to flight his troubles. And even as it was, + the world seemed to be growing dim to his eyes.... + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile, plea after plea had been presented to the legal authorities, + and daily were relatives whom no one had before heard of putting in an + appearance. Yes, like vultures to a corpse did these good folk come + flocking to the immense property which Madam Khanasarov had left behind + her. Everywhere were heard rumours against Chichikov, rumours with regard + to the validity of the second will, rumours with regard to will number + one, and rumours of larceny and concealment of funds. Also, there came to + hand information with regard both to Chichikov’s purchase of dead souls + and to his conniving at contraband goods during his service in the Customs + Department. In short, every possible item of evidence was exhumed, and the + whole of his previous history investigated. How the authorities had come + to suspect and to ascertain all this God only knows, but the fact remains + that there had fallen into the hands of those authorities information + concerning matters of which Chichikov had believed only himself and the + four walls to be aware. True, for a time these matters remained within the + cognisance of none but the functionaries concerned, and failed to reach + Chichikov’s ears; but at length a letter from a confidential friend gave + him reason to think that the fat was about to fall into the fire. Said the + letter briefly: “Dear sir, I beg to advise you that possibly legal trouble + is pending, but that you have no cause for uneasiness, seeing that + everything will be attended to by yours very truly.” Yet, in spite of its + tenor, the epistle reassured its recipient. “What a genius the fellow is!” + thought Chichikov to himself. Next, to complete his satisfaction, his + tailor arrived with the new suit which he had ordered. Not without a + certain sense of pride did our hero inspect the frockcoat of smoked grey + shot with flame colour and look at it from every point of view, and then + try on the breeches—the latter fitting him like a picture, and quite + concealing any deficiencies in the matter of his thighs and calves + (though, when buckled behind, they left his stomach projecting like a + drum). True, the customer remarked that there appeared to be a slight + tightness under the right armpit, but the smiling tailor only rejoined + that that would cause the waist to fit all the better. “Sir,” he said + triumphantly, “you may rest assured that the work has been executed + exactly as it ought to have been executed. No one, except in St. + Petersburg, could have done it better.” As a matter of fact, the tailor + himself hailed from St. Petersburg, but called himself on his signboard + “Foreign Costumier from London and Paris”—the truth being that by + the use of a double-barrelled flourish of cities superior to mere + “Karlsruhe” and “Copenhagen” he designed to acquire business and cut out + his local rivals. + </p> + <p> + Chichikov graciously settled the man’s account, and, as soon as he had + gone, paraded at leisure, and con amore, and after the manner of an artist + of aesthetic taste, before the mirror. Somehow he seemed to look better + than ever in the suit, for his cheeks had now taken on a still more + interesting air, and his chin an added seductiveness, while his white + collar lent tone to his neck, the blue satin tie heightened the effect of + the collar, the fashionable dickey set off the tie, the rich satin + waistcoat emphasised the dickey, and the + smoked-grey-shot-with-flame-colour frockcoat, shining like silk, + splendidly rounded off the whole. When he turned to the right he looked + well: when he turned to the left he looked even better. In short, it was a + costume worthy of a Lord Chamberlain or the species of dandy who shrinks + from swearing in the Russian language, but amply relieves his feelings in + the language of France. Next, inclining his head slightly to one side, our + hero endeavoured to pose as though he were addressing a middle-aged lady + of exquisite refinement; and the result of these efforts was a picture + which any artist might have yearned to portray. Next, his delight led him + gracefully to execute a hop in ballet fashion, so that the wardrobe + trembled and a bottle of eau-de-Cologne came crashing to the floor. Yet + even this contretemps did not upset him; he merely called the offending + bottle a fool, and then debated whom first he should visit in his + attractive guise. + </p> + <p> + Suddenly there resounded through the hall a clatter of spurred heels, and + then the voice of a gendarme saying: “You are commanded to present + yourself before the Governor-General!” Turning round, Chichikov stared in + horror at the spectacle presented; for in the doorway there was standing + an apparition wearing a huge moustache, a helmet surmounted with a + horsehair plume, a pair of crossed shoulder-belts, and a gigantic sword! A + whole army might have been combined into a single individual! And when + Chichikov opened his mouth to speak the apparition repeated, “You are + commanded to present yourself before the Governor-General,” and at the + same moment our hero caught sight both of a second apparition outside the + door and of a coach waiting beneath the window. What was to be done? + Nothing whatever was possible. Just as he stood—in his + smoked-grey-shot-with-flame-colour suit—he had then and there to + enter the vehicle, and, shaking in every limb, and with a gendarme seated + by his side, to start for the residence of the Governor-General. + </p> + <p> + And even in the hall of that establishment no time was given him to pull + himself together, for at once an aide-de-camp said: “Go inside + immediately, for the Prince is awaiting you.” And as in a dream did our + hero see a vestibule where couriers were being handed dispatches, and then + a salon which he crossed with the thought, “I suppose I am not to be + allowed a trial, but shall be sent straight to Siberia!” And at the + thought his heart started beating in a manner which the most jealous of + lovers could not have rivalled. At length there opened a door, and before + him he saw a study full of portfolios, ledgers, and dispatch-boxes, with, + standing behind them, the gravely menacing figure of the Prince. + </p> + <p> + “There stands my executioner,” thought Chichikov to himself. “He is about + to tear me to pieces as a wolf tears a lamb.” + </p> + <p> + Indeed, the Prince’s lips were simply quivering with rage. + </p> + <p> + “Once before did I spare you,” he said, “and allow you to remain in the + town when you ought to have been in prison: yet your only return for my + clemency has been to revert to a career of fraud—and of fraud as + dishonourable as ever a man engaged in.” + </p> + <p> + “To what dishonourable fraud do you refer, your Highness?” asked + Chichikov, trembling from head to foot. + </p> + <p> + The Prince approached, and looked him straight in the eyes. + </p> + <p> + “Let me tell you,” he said, “that the woman whom you induced to witness a + certain will has been arrested, and that you will be confronted with her.” + </p> + <p> + The world seemed suddenly to grow dim before Chichikov’s sight. + </p> + <p> + “Your Highness,” he gasped, “I will tell you the whole truth, and nothing + but the truth. I am guilty—yes, I am guilty; but I am not so guilty + as you think, for I was led away by rascals.” + </p> + <p> + “That any one can have led you away is impossible,” retorted the Prince. + “Recorded against your name there stand more felonies than even the most + hardened liar could have invented. I believe that never in your life have + you done a deed not innately dishonourable—that not a kopeck have + you ever obtained by aught but shameful methods of trickery and theft, the + penalty for which is Siberia and the knut. But enough of this! From this + room you will be conveyed to prison, where, with other rogues and thieves, + you will be confined until your trial may come on. And this is lenient + treatment on my part, for you are worse, far worse, than the felons who + will be your companions. THEY are but poor men in smocks and sheepskins, + whereas YOU—” Without concluding his words, the Prince shot a glance + at Chichikov’s smoked-grey-shot-with-flame-colour apparel. + </p> + <p> + Then he touched a bell. + </p> + <p> + “Your Highness,” cried Chichikov, “have mercy upon me! You are the father + of a family! Spare me for the sake of my aged mother!” + </p> + <p> + “Rubbish!” exclaimed the Prince. “Even as before you besought me for the + sake of a wife and children whom you did not even possess, so now you + would speak to me of an aged mother!” + </p> + <p> + “Your Highness,” protested Chichikov, “though I am a wretch and the lowest + of rascals, and though it is true that I lied when I told you that I + possessed a wife and children, I swear that, as God is my witness, it has + always been my DESIRE to possess a wife, and to fulfil all the duties of a + man and a citizen, and to earn the respect of my fellows and the + authorities. But what could be done against the force of circumstances? By + hook or by crook I have ever been forced to win a living, though + confronted at every step by wiles and temptations and traitorous enemies + and despoilers. So much has this been so that my life has, throughout, + resembled a barque tossed by tempestuous waves, a barque driven at the + mercy of the winds. Ah, I am only a man, your Highness!” + </p> + <p> + And in a moment the tears had gushed in torrents from his eyes, and he had + fallen forward at the Prince’s feet—fallen forward just as he was, + in his smoked-grey-shot-with-flame-colour frockcoat, his velvet waistcoat, + his satin tie, and his exquisitely fitting breeches, while from his neatly + brushed pate, as again and again he struck his hand against his forehead, + there came an odorous whiff of best-quality eau-de-Cologne. + </p> + <p> + “Away with him!” exclaimed the Prince to the gendarme who had just + entered. “Summon the escort to remove him.” + </p> + <p> + “Your Highness!” Chichikov cried again as he clasped the Prince’s knees; + but, shuddering all over, and struggling to free himself, the Prince + repeated his order for the prisoner’s removal. + </p> + <p> + “Your Highness, I say that I will not leave this room until you have + accorded me mercy!” cried Chichikov as he clung to the Prince’s leg with + such tenacity that, frockcoat and all, he began to be dragged along the + floor. + </p> + <p> + “Away with him, I say!” once more the Prince exclaimed with the sort of + indefinable aversion which one feels at the sight of a repulsive insect + which he cannot summon up the courage to crush with his boot. So + convulsively did the Prince shudder that Chichikov, clinging to his leg, + received a kick on the nose. Yet still the prisoner retained his hold; + until at length a couple of burly gendarmes tore him away and, grasping + his arms, hurried him—pale, dishevelled, and in that strange, + half-conscious condition into which a man sinks when he sees before him + only the dark, terrible figure of death, the phantom which is so abhorrent + to all our natures—from the building. But on the threshold the party + came face to face with Murazov, and in Chichikov’s heart the circumstance + revived a ray of hope. Wresting himself with almost supernatural strength + from the grasp of the escorting gendarmes, he threw himself at the feet of + the horror-stricken old man. + </p> + <p> + “Paul Ivanovitch,” Murazov exclaimed, “what has happened to you?” + </p> + <p> + “Save me!” gasped Chichikov. “They are taking me away to prison and + death!” + </p> + <p> + Yet almost as he spoke the gendarmes seized him again, and hurried him + away so swiftly that Murazov’s reply escaped his ears. + </p> + <p> + A damp, mouldy cell which reeked of soldiers’ boots and leggings, an + unvarnished table, two sorry chairs, a window closed with a grating, a + crazy stove which, while letting the smoke emerge through its cracks, gave + out no heat—such was the den to which the man who had just begun to + taste the sweets of life, and to attract the attention of his fellows with + his new suit of smoked-grey-shot-with-flame-colour, now found himself + consigned. Not even necessaries had he been allowed to bring away with + him, nor his dispatch-box which contained all his booty. No, with the + indenture deeds of the dead souls, it was lodged in the hands of a + tchinovnik; and as he thought of these things Chichikov rolled about the + floor, and felt the cankerous worm of remorse seize upon and gnaw at his + heart, and bite its way ever further and further into that heart so + defenceless against its ravages, until he made up his mind that, should he + have to suffer another twenty-four hours of this misery, there would no + longer be a Chichikov in the world. Yet over him, as over every one, there + hung poised the All-Saving Hand; and, an hour after his arrival at the + prison, the doors of the gaol opened to admit Murazov. + </p> + <p> + Compared with poor Chichikov’s sense of relief when the old man entered + his cell, even the pleasure experienced by a thirsty, dusty traveller when + he is given a drink of clear spring water to cool his dry, parched throat + fades into insignificance. + </p> + <p> + “Ah, my deliverer!” he cried as he rose from the floor, where he had been + grovelling in heartrending paroxysms of grief. Seizing the old man’s hand, + he kissed it and pressed it to his bosom. Then, bursting into tears, he + added: “God Himself will reward you for having come to visit an + unfortunate wretch!” + </p> + <p> + Murazov looked at him sorrowfully, and said no more than “Ah, Paul + Ivanovitch, Paul Ivanovitch! What has happened?” + </p> + <p> + “What has happened?” cried Chichikov. “I have been ruined by an accursed + woman. That was because I could not do things in moderation—I was + powerless to stop myself in time, Satan tempted me, and drove me from my + senses, and bereft me of human prudence. Yes, truly I have sinned, I have + sinned! Yet how came I so to sin? To think that a dvorianin—yes, a + dvorianin—should be thrown into prison without process or trial! I + repeat, a dvorianin! Why was I not given time to go home and collect my + effects? Whereas now they are left with no one to look after them! My + dispatch-box, my dispatch-box! It contained my whole property, all that my + heart’s blood and years of toil and want have been needed to acquire. And + now everything will be stolen, Athanasi Vassilievitch—everything + will be taken from me! My God!” + </p> + <p> + And, unable to stand against the torrent of grief which came rushing over + his heart once more, he sobbed aloud in tones which penetrated even the + thickness of the prison walls, and made dull echoes awake behind them. + Then, tearing off his satin tie, and seizing by the collar, the + smoked-grey-shot-with-flame-colour frockcoat, he stripped the latter from + his shoulders. + </p> + <p> + “Ah, Paul Ivanovitch,” said the old man, “how even now the property which + you have acquired is blinding your eyes, and causing you to fail to + realise your terrible position!” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, my good friend and benefactor,” wailed poor Chichikov despairingly, + and clasping Murazov by the knees. “Yet save me if you can! The Prince is + fond of you, and would do anything for your sake.” + </p> + <p> + “No, Paul Ivanovitch; however much I might wish to save you, and however + much I might try to do so, I could not help you as you desire; for it is + to the power of an inexorable law, and not to the authority of any one + man, that you have rendered yourself subject.” + </p> + <p> + “Satan tempted me, and has ended by making of me an outcast from the human + race!” Chichikov beat his head against the wall and struck the table with + his fist until the blood spurted from his hand. Yet neither his head nor + his hand seemed to be conscious of the least pain. + </p> + <p> + “Calm yourself, Paul Ivanovitch,” said Murazov. “Calm yourself, and + consider how best you can make your peace with God. Think of your + miserable soul, and not of the judgment of man.” + </p> + <p> + “I will, Athanasi Vassilievitch, I will. But what a fate is mine! Did ever + such a fate befall a man? To think of all the patience with which I have + gathered my kopecks, of all the toil and trouble which I have endured! Yet + what I have done has not been done with the intention of robbing any one, + nor of cheating the Treasury. Why, then, did I gather those kopecks? I + gathered them to the end that one day I might be able to live in plenty, + and also to have something to leave to the wife and children whom, for the + benefit and welfare of my country, I hoped eventually to win and maintain. + That was why I gathered those kopecks. True, I worked by devious methods—that + I fully admit; but what else could I do? And even devious methods I + employed only when I saw that the straight road would not serve my purpose + so well as a crooked. Moreover, as I toiled, the appetite for those + methods grew upon me. Yet what I took I took only from the rich; whereas + villains exist who, while drawing thousands a year from the Treasury, + despoil the poor, and take from the man with nothing even that which he + has. Is it not the cruelty of fate, therefore, that, just when I was + beginning to reap the harvest of my toil—to touch it, so to speak, + with the tip of one finger—there should have arisen a sudden storm + which has sent my barque to pieces on a rock? My capital had nearly + reached the sum of three hundred thousand roubles, and a three-storied + house was as good as mine, and twice over I could have bought a country + estate. Why, then, should such a tempest have burst upon me? Why should I + have sustained such a blow? Was not my life already like a barque tossed + to and fro by the billows? Where is Heaven’s justice—where is the + reward for all my patience, for my boundless perseverance? Three times did + I have to begin life afresh, and each time that I lost my all I began with + a single kopeck at a moment when other men would have given themselves up + to despair and drink. How much did I not have to overcome. How much did I + not have to bear! Every kopeck which I gained I had to make with my whole + strength; for though, to others, wealth may come easily, every coin of + mine had to be ‘forged with a nail worth three kopecks’ as the proverb has + it. With such a nail—with the nail of an iron, unwearying + perseverance—did <i>I</i> forge my kopecks.” + </p> + <p> + Convulsively sobbing with a grief which he could not repress, Chichikov + sank upon a chair, tore from his shoulders the last ragged, trailing + remnants of his frockcoat, and hurled them from him. Then, thrusting his + fingers into the hair which he had once been so careful to preserve, he + pulled it out by handfuls at a time, as though he hoped through physical + pain to deaden the mental agony which he was suffering. + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile Murazov sat gazing in silence at the unwonted spectacle of a man + who had lately been mincing with the gait of a worldling or a military fop + now writhing in dishevelment and despair as he poured out upon the hostile + forces by which human ingenuity so often finds itself outwitted a flood of + invective. + </p> + <p> + “Paul Ivanovitch, Paul Ivanovitch,” at length said Murazov, “what could + not each of us rise to be did we but devote to good ends the same measure + of energy and of patience which we bestow upon unworthy objects! How much + good would not you yourself have effected! Yet I do not grieve so much for + the fact that you have sinned against your fellow as I grieve for the fact + that you have sinned against yourself and the rich store of gifts and + opportunities which has been committed to your care. Though originally + destined to rise, you have wandered from the path and fallen.” + </p> + <p> + “Ah, Athanasi Vassilievitch,” cried poor Chichikov, clasping his friend’s + hands, “I swear to you that, if you would but restore me my freedom, and + recover for me my lost property, I would lead a different life from this + time forth. Save me, you who alone can work my deliverance! Save me!” + </p> + <p> + “How can I do that? So to do I should need to procure the setting aside of + a law. Again, even if I were to make the attempt, the Prince is a strict + administrator, and would refuse on any consideration to release you.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but for you all things are possible. It is not the law that troubles + me: with that I could find a means to deal. It is the fact that for no + offence at all I have been cast into prison, and treated like a dog, and + deprived of my papers and dispatch-box and all my property. Save me if you + can.” + </p> + <p> + Again clasping the old man’s knees, he bedewed them with his tears. + </p> + <p> + “Paul Ivanovitch,” said Murazov, shaking his head, “how that property of + yours still seals your eyes and ears, so that you cannot so much as listen + to the promptings of your own soul!” + </p> + <p> + “Ah, I will think of my soul, too, if only you will save me.” + </p> + <p> + “Paul Ivanovitch,” the old man began again, and then stopped. For a little + while there was a pause. + </p> + <p> + “Paul Ivanovitch,” at length he went on, “to save you does not lie within + my power. Surely you yourself see that? But, so far as I can, I will + endeavour to, at all events, lighten your lot and procure your eventual + release. Whether or not I shall succeed I do not know; but I will make the + attempt. And should I, contrary to my expectations, prove successful, I + beg of you, in return for these my efforts, to renounce all thought of + benefit from the property which you have acquired. Sincerely do I assure + you that, were I myself to be deprived of my property (and my property + greatly exceeds yours in magnitude), I should not shed a single tear. It + is not the property of which men can deprive us that matters, but the + property of which no one on earth can deprive or despoil us. You are a man + who has seen something of life—to use your own words, you have been + a barque tossed hither and thither by tempestuous waves: yet still will + there be left to you a remnant of substance on which to live, and + therefore I beseech you to settle down in some quiet nook where there is a + church, and where none but plain, good-hearted folk abide. Or, should you + feel a yearning to leave behind you posterity, take in marriage a good + woman who shall bring you, not money, but an aptitude for simple, modest + domestic life. But this life—the life of turmoil, with its longings + and its temptations—forget, and let it forget YOU; for there is no + peace in it. See for yourself how, at every step, it brings one but hatred + and treachery and deceit.” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed, yes!” agreed the repentant Chichikov. “Gladly will I do as you + wish, since for many a day past have I been longing to amend my life, and + to engage in husbandry, and to reorder my affairs. A demon, the tempter + Satan himself, has beguiled me and led me from the right path.” + </p> + <p> + Suddenly there had recurred to Chichikov long-unknown, long-unfamiliar + feelings. Something seemed to be striving to come to life again in him—something + dim and remote, something which had been crushed out of his boyhood by the + dreary, deadening education of his youthful days, by his desolate home, by + his subsequent lack of family ties, by the poverty and niggardliness of + his early impressions, by the grim eye of fate—an eye which had + always seemed to be regarding him as through a misty, mournful, + frost-encrusted window-pane, and to be mocking at his struggles for + freedom. And as these feelings came back to the penitent a groan burst + from his lips, and, covering his face with his hands, he moaned: “It is + all true, it is all true!” + </p> + <p> + “Of little avail are knowledge of the world and experience of men unless + based upon a secure foundation,” observed Murazov. “Though you have + fallen, Paul Ivanovitch, awake to better things, for as yet there is + time.” + </p> + <p> + “No, no!” groaned Chichikov in a voice which made Murazov’s heart bleed. + “It is too late, too late. More and more is the conviction gaining upon me + that I am powerless, that I have strayed too far ever to be able to do as + you bid me. The fact that I have become what I am is due to my early + schooling; for, though my father taught me moral lessons, and beat me, and + set me to copy maxims into a book, he himself stole land from his + neighbours, and forced me to help him. I have even known him to bring an + unjust suit, and defraud the orphan whose guardian he was! Consequently I + know and feel that, though my life has been different from his, I do not + hate roguery as I ought to hate it, and that my nature is coarse, and that + in me there is no real love for what is good, no real spark of that + beautiful instinct for well-doing which becomes a second nature, a settled + habit. Also, never do I yearn to strive for what is right as I yearn to + acquire property. This is no more than the truth. What else could I do but + confess it?” + </p> + <p> + The old man sighed. + </p> + <p> + “Paul Ivanovitch,” he said, “I know that you possess will-power, and that + you possess also perseverance. A medicine may be bitter, yet the patient + will gladly take it when assured that only by its means can he recover. + Therefore, if it really be that you have no genuine love for doing good, + do good by FORCING yourself to do so. Thus you will benefit yourself even + more than you will benefit him for whose sake the act is performed. Only + force yourself to do good just once and again, and, behold, you will + suddenly conceive the TRUE love for well-doing. That is so, believe me. ‘A + kingdom is to be won only by striving,’ says the proverb. That is to say, + things are to be attained only by putting forth one’s whole strength, + since nothing short of one’s whole strength will bring one to the desired + goal. Paul Ivanovitch, within you there is a source of strength denied to + many another man. I refer to the strength of an iron perseverance. Cannot + THAT help you to overcome? Most men are weak and lack will-power, whereas + I believe that you possess the power to act a hero’s part.” + </p> + <p> + Sinking deep into Chichikov’s heart, these words would seem to have + aroused in it a faint stirring of ambition, so much so that, if it was not + fortitude which shone in his eyes, at all events it was something virile, + and of much the same nature. + </p> + <p> + “Athanasi Vassilievitch,” he said firmly, “if you will but petition for my + release, as well as for permission for me to leave here with a portion of + my property, I swear to you on my word of honour that I will begin a new + life, and buy a country estate, and become the head of a household, and + save money, not for myself, but for others, and do good everywhere, and to + the best of my ability, and forget alike myself and the feasting and + debauchery of town life, and lead, instead, a plain, sober existence.” + </p> + <p> + “In that resolve may God strengthen you!” cried the old man with unbounded + joy. “And I, for my part, will do my utmost to procure your release. And + though God alone knows whether my efforts will be successful, at all + events I hope to bring about a mitigation of your sentence. Come, let me + embrace you! How you have filled my heart with gladness! With God’s help, + I will now go to the Prince.” + </p> + <p> + And the next moment Chichikov found himself alone. His whole nature felt + shaken and softened, even as, when the bellows have fanned the furnace to + a sufficient heat, a plate compounded even of the hardest and most + fire-resisting metal dissolves, glows, and turns to the liquefied state. + </p> + <p> + “I myself can feel but little,” he reflected, “but I intend to use my + every faculty to help others to feel. I myself am but bad and worthless, + but I intend to do my utmost to set others on the right road. I myself am + but an indifferent Christian, but I intend to strive never to yield to + temptation, but to work hard, and to till my land with the sweat of my + brow, and to engage only in honourable pursuits, and to influence my + fellows in the same direction. For, after all, am I so very useless? At + least I could maintain a household, for I am frugal and active and + intelligent and steadfast. The only thing is to make up my mind to it.” + </p> + <p> + Thus Chichikov pondered; and as he did so his half-awakened energies of + soul touched upon something. That is to say, dimly his instinct divined + that every man has a duty to perform, and that that duty may be performed + here, there, and everywhere, and no matter what the circumstances and the + emotions and the difficulties which compass a man about. And with such + clearness did Chichikov mentally picture to himself the life of grateful + toil which lies removed from the bustle of towns and the temptations which + man, forgetful of the obligation of labour, has invented to beguile an + hour of idleness that almost our hero forgot his unpleasant position, and + even felt ready to thank Providence for the calamity which had befallen + him, provided that it should end in his being released, and in his + receiving back a portion of his property. + </p> + <p> + Presently the massive door of the cell opened to admit a tchinovnik named + Samosvitov, a robust, sensual individual who was reputed by his comrades + to be something of a rake. Had he served in the army, he would have done + wonders, for he would have stormed any point, however dangerous and + inaccessible, and captured cannon under the very noses of the foe; but, as + it was, the lack of a more warlike field for his energies caused him to + devote the latter principally to dissipation. Nevertheless he enjoyed + great popularity, for he was loyal to the point that, once his word had + been given, nothing would ever make him break it. At the same time, some + reason or another led him to regard his superiors in the light of a + hostile battery which, come what might, he must breach at any weak or + unguarded spot or gap which might be capable of being utilised for the + purpose. + </p> + <p> + “We have all heard of your plight,” he began as soon as the door had been + safely closed behind him. “Yes, every one has heard of it. But never mind. + Things will yet come right. We will do our very best for you, and act as + your humble servants in everything. Thirty thousand roubles is our price—no + more.” + </p> + <p> + “Indeed?” said Chichikov. “And, for that, shall I be completely + exonerated?” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, completely, and also given some compensation for your loss of time.” + </p> + <p> + “And how much am I to pay in return, you say?” + </p> + <p> + “Thirty thousand roubles, to be divided among ourselves, the + Governor-General’s staff, and the Governor-General’s secretary.” + </p> + <p> + “But how is even that to be managed, for all my effects, including my + dispatch-box, will have been sealed up and taken away for examination?” + </p> + <p> + “In an hour’s time they will be within your hands again,” said Samosvitov. + “Shall we shake hands over the bargain?” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov did so with a beating heart, for he could scarcely believe his + ears. + </p> + <p> + “For the present, then, farewell,” concluded Samosvitov. “I have + instructed a certain mutual friend that the important points are silence + and presence of mind.” + </p> + <p> + “Hm!” thought Chichikov. “It is to my lawyer that he is referring.” + </p> + <p> + Even when Samosvitov had departed the prisoner found it difficult to + credit all that had been said. Yet not an hour had elapsed before a + messenger arrived with his dispatch-box and the papers and money therein + practically undisturbed and intact! Later it came out that Samosvitov had + assumed complete authority in the matter. First, he had rebuked the + gendarmes guarding Chichikov’s effects for lack of vigilance, and then + sent word to the Superintendent that additional men were required for the + purpose; after which he had taken the dispatch-box into his own charge, + removed from it every paper which could possibly compromise Chichikov, + sealed up the rest in a packet, and ordered a gendarme to convey the whole + to their owner on the pretence of forwarding him sundry garments necessary + for the night. In the result Chichikov received not only his papers, but + also some warm clothing for his hypersensitive limbs. Such a swift + recovery of his treasures delighted him beyond expression, and, gathering + new hope, he began once more to dream of such allurements as theatre-going + and the ballet girl after whom he had for some time past been dangling. + Gradually did the country estate and the simple life begin to recede into + the distance: gradually did the town house and the life of gaiety begin to + loom larger and larger in the foreground. Oh, life, life! + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile in Government offices and chancellories there had been set on + foot a boundless volume of work. Clerical pens slaved, and brains skilled + in legal casus toiled; for each official had the artist’s liking for the + curved line in preference to the straight. And all the while, like a + hidden magician, Chichikov’s lawyer imparted driving power to that machine + which caught up a man into its mechanism before he could even look round. + And the complexity of it increased and increased, for Samosvitov surpassed + himself in importance and daring. On learning of the place of confinement + of the woman who had been arrested, he presented himself at the doors, and + passed so well for a smart young officer of gendarmery that the sentry + saluted and sprang to attention. + </p> + <p> + “Have you been on duty long?” asked Samosvitov. + </p> + <p> + “Since this morning, your Excellency.” + </p> + <p> + “And shall you soon be relieved?” + </p> + <p> + “In three hours from now, your Excellency.” + </p> + <p> + “Presently I shall want you, so I will instruct your officer to have you + relieved at once.” + </p> + <p> + “Very good, your Excellency.” + </p> + <p> + Hastening home, thereafter, at top speed, and donning the uniform of a + gendarme, with a false moustache and a pair of false whiskers—an + ensemble in which the devil himself would not have known him, Samosvitov + then made for the gaol where Chichikov was confined, and, en route, + impressed into the service the first street woman whom he encountered, and + handed her over to the care of two young fellows of like sort with + himself. The next step was to hurry back to the prison where the original + woman had been interned, and there to intimate to the sentry that he, + Samosvitov (with whiskers and rifle complete), had been sent to relieve + the said sentry at his post—a proceeding which, of course, enabled + the newly-arrived relief to ensure, while performing his self-assumed turn + of duty, that for the woman lying under arrest there should be substituted + the woman recently recruited to the plot, and that the former should then + be conveyed to a place of concealment where she was highly unlikely to be + discovered. + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile, Samosvitov’s feats in the military sphere were being rivalled + by the wonders worked by Chichikov’s lawyer in the civilian field of + action. As a first step, the lawyer caused it to be intimated to the local + Governor that the Public Prosecutor was engaged in drawing up a report to + his, the local Governor’s, detriment; whereafter the lawyer caused it to + be intimated also to the Chief of Gendarmery that a certain confidential + official was engaged in doing the same by HIM; whereafter, again, the + lawyer confided to the confidential official in question that, owing to + the documentary exertions of an official of a still more confidential + nature than the first, he (the confidential official first-mentioned) was + in a fair way to find himself in the same boat as both the local Governor + and the Chief of Gendarmery: with the result that the whole trio were + reduced to a frame of mind in which they were only too glad to turn to him + (Samosvitov) for advice. The ultimate and farcical upshot was that report + came crowding upon report, and that such alleged doings were brought to + light as the sun had never before beheld. In fact, the documents in + question employed anything and everything as material, even to announcing + that such and such an individual had an illegitimate son, that such and + such another kept a paid mistress, and that such and such a third was + troubled with a gadabout wife; whereby there became interwoven with and + welded into Chichikov’s past history and the story of the dead souls such + a crop of scandals and innuendoes that by no manner of means could any + mortal decide to which of these rubbishy romances to award the palm, since + all of them presented an equal claim to that honour. Naturally, when, at + length, the dossier reached the Governor-General himself it simply + flabbergasted the poor man; and even the exceptionally clever and + energetic secretary to whom he deputed the making of an abstract of the + same very nearly lost his reason with the strain of attempting to lay hold + of the tangled end of the skein. It happened that just at that time the + Prince had several other important affairs on hand, and affairs of a very + unpleasant nature. That is to say, famine had made its appearance in one + portion of the province, and the tchinovniks sent to distribute food to + the people had done their work badly; in another portion of the province + certain Raskolniki <a href="#linknote-51" id="linknoteref-51"><small>51</small></a> were in a state of ferment, + owing to the spreading of a report than an Antichrist had arisen who would + not even let the dead rest, but was purchasing them wholesale—wherefore + the said Raskolniki were summoning folk to prayer and repentance, and, + under cover of capturing the Antichrist in question, were bludgeoning + non-Antichrists in batches; lastly, the peasants of a third portion of the + province had risen against the local landowners and superintendents of + police, for the reason that certain rascals had started a rumour that the + time was come when the peasants themselves were to become landowners, and + to wear frockcoats, while the landowners in being were about to revert to + the peasant state, and to take their own wares to market; wherefore one of + the local volosts<a href="#linknote-52" id="linknoteref-52"><small>52</small></a>, oblivious of the fact that an + order of things of that kind would lead to a superfluity alike of + landowners and of superintendents of police, had refused to pay its taxes, + and necessitated recourse to forcible measures. Hence it was in a mood of + the greatest possible despondency that the poor Prince was sitting plunged + when word was brought to him that the old man who had gone bail for + Chichikov was waiting to see him. + </p> + <p> + “Show him in,” said the Prince; and the old man entered. + </p> + <p> + “A fine fellow your Chichikov!” began the Prince angrily. “You defended + him, and went bail for him, even though he had been up to business which + even the lowest thief would not have touched!” + </p> + <p> + “Pardon me, your Highness; I do not understand to what you are referring.” + </p> + <p> + “I am referring to the matter of the fraudulent will. The fellow ought to + have been given a public flogging for it.” + </p> + <p> + “Although to exculpate Chichikov is not my intention, might I ask you + whether you do not think the case is non-proven? At all events, sufficient + evidence against him is still lacking.” + </p> + <p> + “What? We have as chief witness the woman who personated the deceased, and + I will have her interrogated in your presence.” + </p> + <p> + Touching a bell, the Prince ordered her to be sent for. + </p> + <p> + “It is a most disgraceful affair,” he went on; “and, ashamed though I am + to have to say it, some of our leading tchinovniks, including the local + Governor himself, have become implicated in the matter. Yet you tell me + that this Chichikov ought not to be confined among thieves and rascals!” + Clearly the Governor-General’s wrath was very great indeed. + </p> + <p> + “Your Highness,” said Murazov, “the Governor of the town is one of the + heirs under the will: wherefore he has a certain right to intervene. Also, + the fact that extraneous persons have meddled in the matter is only what + is to be expected from human nature. A rich woman dies, and no exact, + regular disposition of her property is made. Hence there comes flocking + from every side a cloud of fortune hunters. What else could one expect? + Such is human nature.” + </p> + <p> + “Yes, but why should such persons go and commit fraud?” asked the Prince + irritably. “I feel as though not a single honest tchinovnik were available—as + though every one of them were a rogue.” + </p> + <p> + “Your Highness, which of us is altogether beyond reproach? The tchinovniks + of our town are human beings, and no more. Some of them are men of worth, + and nearly all of them men skilled in business—though also, + unfortunately, largely inter-related.” + </p> + <p> + “Now, tell me this, Athanasi Vassilievitch,” said the Prince, “for you are + about the only honest man of my acquaintance. What has inspired in you + such a penchant for defending rascals?” + </p> + <p> + “This,” replied Murazov. “Take any man you like of the persons whom you + thus term rascals. That man none the less remains a human being. That + being so, how can one refuse to defend him when all the time one knows + that half his errors have been committed through ignorance and stupidity? + Each of us commits faults with every step that we take; each of us entails + unhappiness upon others with every breath that we draw—and that + although we may have no evil intention whatever in our minds. Your + Highness himself has, before now, committed an injustice of the gravest + nature.” + </p> + <p> + “<i>I</i> have?” cried the Prince, taken aback by this unexpected turn + given to the conversation. + </p> + <p> + Murazov remained silent for a moment, as though he were debating something + in his thoughts. Then he said: + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless it is as I say. You committed the injustice in the case of + the lad Dierpiennikov.” + </p> + <p> + “What, Athanasi Vassilievitch? The fellow had infringed one of the + Fundamental Laws! He had been found guilty of treason!” + </p> + <p> + “I am not seeking to justify him; I am only asking you whether you think + it right that an inexperienced youth who had been tempted and led away by + others should have received the same sentence as the man who had taken the + chief part in the affair. That is to say, although Dierpiennikov and the + man Voron-Drianni received an equal measure of punishment, their + CRIMINALITY was not equal.” + </p> + <p> + “If,” exclaimed the Prince excitedly, “you know anything further + concerning the case, for God’s sake tell it me at once. Only the other day + did I forward a recommendation that St. Petersburg should remit a portion + of the sentence.” + </p> + <p> + “Your Highness,” replied Murazov, “I do not mean that I know of anything + which does not lie also within your own cognisance, though one + circumstance there was which might have told in the lad’s favour had he + not refused to admit it, lest another should suffer injury. All that I + have in my mind is this. On that occasion were you not a little over-hasty + in coming to a conclusion? You will understand, of course, that I am + judging only according to my own poor lights, and for the reason that on + more than one occasion you have urged me to be frank. In the days when I + myself acted as a chief of gendarmery I came in contact with a great + number of accused—some of them bad, some of them good; and in each + case I found it well also to consider a man’s past career, for the reason + that, unless one views things calmly, instead of at once decrying a man, + he is apt to take alarm, and to make it impossible thereafter to get any + real confession from him. If, on the other hand, you question a man as + friend might question friend, the result will be that straightway he will + tell you everything, nor ask for mitigation of his penalty, nor bear you + the least malice, in that he will understand that it is not you who have + punished him, but the law.” + </p> + <p> + The Prince relapsed into thought; until presently there entered a young + tchinovnik. Portfolio in hand, this official stood waiting respectfully. + Care and hard work had already imprinted their insignia upon his fresh + young face; for evidently he had not been in the Service for nothing. As a + matter of fact, his greatest joy was to labour at a tangled case, and + successfully to unravel it. + </p> +<p class="center p2"> + [At this point a long hiatus occurs in the original.] +</p> + <p> + “I will send corn to the localities where famine is worst,” said Murazov, + “for I understand that sort of work better than do the tchinovniks, and + will personally see to the needs of each person. Also, if you will allow + me, your Highness, I will go and have a talk with the Raskolniki. They are + more likely to listen to a plain man than to an official. God knows + whether I shall succeed in calming them, but at least no tchinovnik could + do so, for officials of the kind merely draw up reports and lose their way + among their own documents—with the result that nothing comes of it. + Nor will I accept from you any money for these purposes, since I am + ashamed to devote as much as a thought to my own pocket at a time when men + are dying of hunger. I have a large stock of grain lying in my granaries; + in addition to which, I have sent orders to Siberia that a new consignment + shall be forwarded me before the coming summer.” + </p> + <p> + “Of a surety will God reward you for your services, Athanasi + Vassilievitch! Not another word will I say to you on the subject, for you + yourself feel that any words from me would be inadequate. Yet tell me one + thing: I refer to the case of which you know. Have I the right to pass + over the case? Also, would it be just and honourable on my part to let the + offending tchinovniks go unpunished?” + </p> + <p> + “Your Highness, it is impossible to return a definite answer to those two + questions: and the more so because many rascals are at heart men of + rectitude. Human problems are difficult things to solve. Sometimes a man + may be drawn into a vicious circle, so that, having once entered it, he + ceases to be himself.” + </p> + <p> + “But what would the tchinovniks say if I allowed the case to be passed + over? Would not some of them turn up their noses at me, and declare that + they have effected my intimidation? Surely they would be the last persons + in the world to respect me for my action?” + </p> + <p> + “Your Highness, I think this: that your best course would be to call them + together, and to inform them that you know everything, and to explain to + them your personal attitude (exactly as you have explained it to me), and + to end by at once requesting their advice and asking them what each of + them would have done had he been placed in similar circumstances.” + </p> + <p> + “What? You think that those tchinovniks would be so accessible to lofty + motives that they would cease thereafter to be venal and meticulous? I + should be laughed at for my pains.” + </p> + <p> + “I think not, your Highness. Even the baser section of humanity possesses + a certain sense of equity. Your wisest plan, your Highness, would be to + conceal nothing and to speak to them as you have just spoken to me. If, at + present, they imagine you to be ambitious and proud and unapproachable and + self-assured, your action would afford them an opportunity of seeing how + the case really stands. Why should you hesitate? You would but be + exercising your undoubted right. Speak to them as though delivering not a + message of your own, but a message from God.” + </p> + <p> + “I will think it over,” the Prince said musingly, “and meanwhile I thank + you from my heart for your good advice.” + </p> + <p> + “Also, I should order Chichikov to leave the town,” suggested Murazov. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, I will do so. Tell him from me that he is to depart hence as quickly + as possible, and that the further he should remove himself, the better it + will be for him. Also, tell him that it is only owing to your efforts that + he has received a pardon at my hands.” + </p> + <p> + Murazov bowed, and proceeded from the Prince’s presence to that of + Chichikov. He found the prisoner cheerfully enjoying a hearty dinner + which, under hot covers, had been brought him from an exceedingly + excellent kitchen. But almost the first words which he uttered showed + Murazov that the prisoner had been having dealings with the army of + bribe-takers; as also that in those transactions his lawyer had played the + principal part. + </p> + <p> + “Listen, Paul Ivanovitch,” the old man said. “I bring you your freedom, + but only on this condition—that you depart out of the town + forthwith. Therefore gather together your effects, and waste not a moment, + lest worse befall you. Also, of all that a certain person has contrived to + do on your behalf I am aware; wherefore let me tell you, as between + ourselves, that should the conspiracy come to light, nothing on earth can + save him, and in his fall he will involve others rather then be left + unaccompanied in the lurch, and not see the guilt shared. How is it that + when I left you recently you were in a better frame of mind than you are + now? I beg of you not to trifle with the matter. Ah me! what boots that + wealth for which men dispute and cut one another’s throats? Do they think + that it is possible to prosper in this world without thinking of the world + to come? Believe me when I say that, until a man shall have renounced all + that leads humanity to contend without giving a thought to the ordering of + spiritual wealth, he will never set his temporal goods either upon a + satisfactory foundation. Yes, even as times of want and scarcity may come + upon nations, so may they come upon individuals. No matter what may be + said to the contrary, the body can never dispense with the soul. Why, + then, will you not try to walk in the right way, and, by thinking no + longer of dead souls, but only of your only living one, regain, with God’s + help, the better road? I too am leaving the town to-morrow. Hasten, + therefore, lest, bereft of my assistance, you meet with some dire + misfortune.” + </p> + <p> + And the old man departed, leaving Chichikov plunged in thought. Once more + had the gravity of life begun to loom large before him. + </p> + <p> + “Yes, Murazov was right,” he said to himself. “It is time that I were + moving.” + </p> + <p> + Leaving the prison—a warder carrying his effects in his wake—he + found Selifan and Petrushka overjoyed at seeing their master once more at + liberty. + </p> + <p> + “Well, good fellows?” he said kindly. “And now we must pack and be off.” + </p> + <p> + “True, true, Paul Ivanovitch,” agreed Selifan. “And by this time the roads + will have become firmer, for much snow has fallen. Yes, high time is it + that we were clear of the town. So weary of it am I that the sight of it + hurts my eyes.” + </p> + <p> + “Go to the coachbuilder’s,” commanded Chichikov, “and have sledge-runners + fitted to the koliaska.” + </p> + <p> + Chichikov then made his way into the town—though not with the object + of paying farewell visits (in view of recent events, that might have given + rise to some awkwardness), but for the purpose of paying an unobtrusive + call at the shop where he had obtained the cloth for his latest suit. + There he now purchased four more arshins of the same + smoked-grey-shot-with-flame-colour material as he had had before, with the + intention of having it made up by the tailor who had fashioned the + previous costume; and by promising double remuneration he induced the + tailor in question so to hasten the cutting out of the garments that, + through sitting up all night over the work, the man might have the whole + ready by break of day. True, the goods were delivered a trifle after the + appointed hour, yet the following morning saw the coat and breeches + completed; and while the horses were being put to, Chichikov tried on the + clothes, and found them equal to the previous creation, even though during + the process he caught sight of a bald patch on his head, and was led + mournfully to reflect: “Alas! Why did I give way to such despair? Surely I + need not have torn my hair out so freely?” + </p> + <p> + Then, when the tailor had been paid, our hero left the town. But no longer + was he the old Chichikov—he was only a ruin of what he had been, and + his frame of mind might have been compared to a building recently pulled + down to make room for a new one, while the new one had not yet been + erected owing to the non-receipt of the plans from the architect. Murazov, + too, had departed, but at an earlier hour, and in a tilt-waggon with Ivan + Potapitch. + </p> + <p> + An hour later the Governor-General issued to all and sundry officials a + notice that, on the occasion of his departure for St. Petersburg, he would + be glad to see the corps of tchinovniks at a private meeting. Accordingly + all ranks and grades of officialdom repaired to his residence, and there + awaited—not without a certain measure of trepidation and of + searching of heart—the Governor-General’s entry. When that took + place he looked neither clear nor dull. Yet his bearing was proud, and his + step assured. The tchinovniks bowed—some of them to the waist, and + he answered their salutations with a slight inclination of the head. Then + he spoke as follows: + </p> + <p> + “Since I am about to pay a visit to St. Petersburg, I have thought it + right to meet you, and to explain to you privately my reasons for doing + so. An affair of a most scandalous character has taken place in our midst. + To what affair I am referring I think most of those present will guess. + Now, an automatic process has led to that affair bringing about the + discovery of other matters. Those matters are no less dishonourable than + the primary one; and to that I regret to have to add that there stand + involved in them certain persons whom I had hitherto believed to be + honourable. Of the object aimed at by those who have complicated matters + to the point of making their resolution almost impossible by ordinary + methods I am aware; as also I am aware of the identity of the ringleader, + despite the skill with which he has sought to conceal his share in the + scandal. But the principal point is, that I propose to decide these + matters, not by formal documentary process, but by the more summary + process of court-martial, and that I hope, when the circumstances have + been laid before his Imperial Majesty, to receive from him authority to + adopt the course which I have mentioned. For I conceive that when it has + become impossible to resolve a case by civil means, and some of the + necessary documents have been burnt, and attempts have been made (both + through the adduction of an excess of false and extraneous evidence and + through the framing of fictitious reports) to cloud an already + sufficiently obscure investigation with an added measure of complexity,—when + all these circumstances have arisen, I conceive that the only possible + tribunal to deal with them is a military tribunal. But on that point I + should like your opinion.” + </p> + <p> + The Prince paused for a moment or two, as though awaiting a reply; but + none came, seeing that every man had his eyes bent upon the floor, and + many of the audience had turned white in the face. + </p> + <p> + “Then,” he went on, “I may say that I am aware also of a matter which + those who have carried it through believe to lie only within the + cognisance of themselves. The particulars of that matter will not be set + forth in documentary form, but only through process of myself acting as + plaintiff and petitioner, and producing none but ocular evidence.” + </p> + <p> + Among the throng of tchinovniks some one gave a start, and thereby caused + others of the more apprehensive sort to fall to trembling in their shoes. + </p> + <p> + “Without saying does it go that the prime conspirators ought to undergo + deprivation of rank and property, and that the remainder ought to be + dismissed from their posts; for though that course would cause a certain + proportion of the innocent to suffer with the guilty, there would seem to + be no other course available, seeing that the affair is one of the most + disgraceful nature, and calls aloud for justice. Therefore, although I + know that to some my action will fail to serve as a lesson, since it will + lead to their succeeding to the posts of dismissed officials, as well as + that others hitherto considered honourable will lose their reputation, and + others entrusted with new responsibilities will continue to cheat and + betray their trust,—although all this is known to me, I still have + no choice but to satisfy the claims of justice by proceeding to take stern + measures. I am also aware that I shall be accused of undue severity; but, + lastly, I am aware that it is my duty to put aside all personal feeling, + and to act as the unconscious instrument of that retribution which justice + demands.” + </p> + <p> + Over every face there passed a shudder. Yet the Prince had spoken calmly, + and not a trace of anger or any other kind of emotion had been visible on + his features. + </p> + <p> + “Nevertheless,” he went on, “the very man in whose hands the fate of so + many now lies, the very man whom no prayer for mercy could ever have + influenced, himself desires to make a request of you. Should you grant + that request, all will be forgotten and blotted out and pardoned, for I + myself will intercede with the Throne on your behalf. That request is + this. I know that by no manner of means, by no preventive measures, and by + no penalties will dishonesty ever be completely extirpated from our midst, + for the reason that its roots have struck too deep, and that the + dishonourable traffic in bribes has become a necessity to, even the + mainstay of, some whose nature is not innately venal. Also, I know that, + to many men, it is an impossibility to swim against the stream. Yet now, + at this solemn and critical juncture, when the country is calling aloud + for saviours, and it is the duty of every citizen to contribute and to + sacrifice his all, I feel that I cannot but issue an appeal to every man + in whom a Russian heart and a spark of what we understand by the word + ‘nobility’ exist. For, after all, which of us is more guilty than his + fellow? It may be to ME the greatest culpability should be assigned, in + that at first I may have adopted towards you too reserved an attitude, + that I may have been over-hasty in repelling those who desired but to + serve me, even though of their services I did not actually stand in need. + Yet, had they really loved justice and the good of their country, I think + that they would have been less prone to take offence at the coldness of my + attitude, but would have sacrificed their feelings and their personality + to their superior convictions. For hardly can it be that I failed to note + their overtures and the loftiness of their motives, or that I would not + have accepted any wise and useful advice proffered. At the same time, it + is for a subordinate to adapt himself to the tone of his superior, rather + than for a superior to adapt himself to the tone of his subordinate. Such + a course is at once more regular and more smooth of working, since a corps + of subordinates has but one director, whereas a director may have a + hundred subordinates. But let us put aside the question of comparative + culpability. The important point is, that before us all lies the duty of + rescuing our fatherland. Our fatherland is suffering, not from the + incursion of a score of alien tongues, but from our own acts, in that, in + addition to the lawful administration, there has grown up a second + administration possessed of infinitely greater powers than the system + established by law. And that second administration has established its + conditions, fixed its tariff of prices, and published that tariff abroad; + nor could any ruler, even though the wisest of legislators and + administrators, do more to correct the evil than limit it in the conduct + of his more venal tchinovniks by setting over them, as their supervisors, + men of superior rectitude. No, until each of us shall come to feel that, + just as arms were taken up during the period of the upheaval of nations, + so now each of us must make a stand against dishonesty, all remedies will + end in failure. As a Russian, therefore—as one bound to you by + consanguinity and identity of blood—I make to you my appeal. I make + it to those of you who understand wherein lies nobility of thought. I + invite those men to remember the duty which confronts us, whatsoever our + respective stations; I invite them to observe more closely their duty, and + to keep more constantly in mind their obligations of holding true to their + country, in that before us the future looms dark, and that we can + scarcely....” + </p> + <hr> +<p class="center p2"> + [Here the manuscript of the original comes abruptly to an end.] +</p> + <p> + <a id="link2H_FOOT"> + <!-- H2 anchor --> </a> + </p> + <div style="height: 4em;"> + <br><br><br><br> + </div> + <h2> + FOOTNOTES: + </h2> + <p> + <a id="linknote-1"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 1 (<a href="#linknoteref-1">return</a>)<br> [ Essays on Russian + Novelists. Macmillan.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-2"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 2 (<a href="#linknoteref-2">return</a>)<br> [ Ideals and Realities in + Russian Literature. Duckworth and Co.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-3"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 3 (<a href="#linknoteref-3">return</a>)<br> [ This is generally referred + to in the Russian criticisms of Gogol as a quotation from Jeremiah. It + appears upon investigation, however, that it actually occurs only in the + Slavonic version from the Greek, and not in the Russian translation made + direct from the Hebrew.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-4"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 4 (<a href="#linknoteref-4">return</a>)<br> [ An urn for brewing honey + tea.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-5"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 5 (<a href="#linknoteref-5">return</a>)<br> [ An urn for brewing ordinary + tea.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-6"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 6 (<a href="#linknoteref-6">return</a>)<br> [ A German dramatist + (1761-1819) who also filled sundry posts in the service of the Russian + Government.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-7"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 7 (<a href="#linknoteref-7">return</a>)<br> [ Priest’s wife.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-8"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 8 (<a href="#linknoteref-8">return</a>)<br> [ In this case the term + General refers to a civil grade equivalent to the military rank of the + same title.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-9"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 9 (<a href="#linknoteref-9">return</a>)<br> [ An annual tax upon + peasants, payment of which secured to the payer the right of removal.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-10"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 10 (<a href="#linknoteref-10">return</a>)<br> [ Cabbage soup.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-11"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 11 (<a href="#linknoteref-11">return</a>)<br> [ Three horses harnessed + abreast.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-12"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 12 (<a href="#linknoteref-12">return</a>)<br> [ A member of the gentry + class.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-13"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 13 (<a href="#linknoteref-13">return</a>)<br> [ Pieces equal in value to + twenty-five kopecks (a quarter of a rouble).] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-14"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 14 (<a href="#linknoteref-14">return</a>)<br> [ A Russian general who, in + 1812, stoutly opposed Napoleon at the battle of Borodino.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-15"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 15 (<a href="#linknoteref-15">return</a>)<br> [ The late eighteenth + century.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-16"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 16 (<a href="#linknoteref-16">return</a>)<br> [ Forty Russian pounds.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-17"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 17 (<a href="#linknoteref-17">return</a>)<br> [ To serve as + blotting-paper.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-18"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 18 (<a href="#linknoteref-18">return</a>)<br> [ A liquor distilled from + fermented bread crusts or sour fruit.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-19"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 19 (<a href="#linknoteref-19">return</a>)<br> [ That is to say, a + distinctively Russian name.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-20"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 20 (<a href="#linknoteref-20">return</a>)<br> [ A jeering appellation + which owes its origin to the fact that certain Russians cherish a + prejudice against the initial character of the word—namely, the + Greek theta, or TH.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-21"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 21 (<a href="#linknoteref-21">return</a>)<br> [ The great Russian general + who, after winning fame in the Seven Years’ War, met with disaster when + attempting to assist the Austrians against the French in 1799.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-22"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 22 (<a href="#linknoteref-22">return</a>)<br> [ A kind of large gnat.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-23"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 23 (<a href="#linknoteref-23">return</a>)<br> [ A copper coin worth five + kopecks.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-24"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 24 (<a href="#linknoteref-24">return</a>)<br> [ A Russian general who + fought against Napoleon, and was mortally wounded at Borodino.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-25"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 25 (<a href="#linknoteref-25">return</a>)<br> [ Literally, “nursemaid.”] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-26"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 26 (<a href="#linknoteref-26">return</a>)<br> [ Village factor or + usurer.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-27"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 27 (<a href="#linknoteref-27">return</a>)<br> [ Subordinate government + officials.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-28"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 28 (<a href="#linknoteref-28">return</a>)<br> [ Nevertheless Chichikov + would appear to have erred, since most people would make the sum amount to + twenty-three roubles, forty kopecks. If so, Chichikov cheated himself of + one rouble, fifty-six kopecks.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-29"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 29 (<a href="#linknoteref-29">return</a>)<br> [ The names Kariakin and + Volokita might, perhaps, be translated as “Gallant” and “Loafer.”] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-30"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 30 (<a href="#linknoteref-30">return</a>)<br> [ Tradesman or citizen.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-31"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 31 (<a href="#linknoteref-31">return</a>)<br> [ The game of + knucklebones.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-32"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 32 (<a href="#linknoteref-32">return</a>)<br> [ A sort of low, + four-wheeled carriage.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-33"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 33 (<a href="#linknoteref-33">return</a>)<br> [ The system by which, in + annual rotation, two-thirds of a given area are cultivated, while the + remaining third is left fallow.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-34"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 34 (<a href="#linknoteref-34">return</a>)<br> [ Public Prosecutor.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-35"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 35 (<a href="#linknoteref-35">return</a>)<br> [ To reproduce this story + with a raciness worthy of the Russian original is practically impossible. + The translator has not attempted the task.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-36"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 36 (<a href="#linknoteref-36">return</a>)<br> [ One of the mistresses of + Louis XIV. of France. In 1680 she wrote a book called Reflexions sur la + Misericorde de Dieu, par une Dame Penitente.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-37"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 37 (<a href="#linknoteref-37">return</a>)<br> [ Four-wheeled open + carriage.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-38"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 38 (<a href="#linknoteref-38">return</a>)<br> [ Silver five kopeck + piece.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-39"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 39 (<a href="#linknoteref-39">return</a>)<br> [ A silver quarter rouble.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-40"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 40 (<a href="#linknoteref-40">return</a>)<br> [ In the days of serfdom, + the rate of forced labour—so many hours or so many days per week—which + the serf had to perform for his proprietor.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-41"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 41 (<a href="#linknoteref-41">return</a>)<br> [ The Elder.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-42"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 42 (<a href="#linknoteref-42">return</a>)<br> [ The Younger.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-43"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 43 (<a href="#linknoteref-43">return</a>)<br> [ Secondary School.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-44"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 44 (<a href="#linknoteref-44">return</a>)<br> [ The desiatin = 2.86 + English acres.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-45"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 45 (<a href="#linknoteref-45">return</a>)<br> [ “One more makes five.”] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-46"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 46 (<a href="#linknoteref-46">return</a>)<br> [ Dried spinal marrow of + the sturgeon.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-47"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 47 (<a href="#linknoteref-47">return</a>)<br> [ Long, belted Tartar + blouses.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-48"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 48 (<a href="#linknoteref-48">return</a>)<br> [ Village commune.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-49"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 49 (<a href="#linknoteref-49">return</a>)<br> [ Landowner.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-50"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 50 (<a href="#linknoteref-50">return</a>)<br> [ Here, in the original, a + word is missing.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-51"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 51 (<a href="#linknoteref-51">return</a>)<br> [ Dissenters or Old + Believers: i.e. members of the sect which refused to accept the revised + version of the Church Service Books promulgated by the Patriarch Nikon in + 1665.] + </p> + <p> + <a id="linknote-52"> + <!-- Note --></a> + </p> + <p class="foot"> + 52 (<a href="#linknoteref-52">return</a>)<br> [ Fiscal districts.] + </p> + +<div>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 1081 ***</div> + </body> +</html> + diff --git a/old/1081-h/images/cover.jpg b/old/1081-h/images/cover.jpg Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..49d2a0c --- /dev/null +++ b/old/1081-h/images/cover.jpg |
