diff options
Diffstat (limited to '10786-0.txt')
| -rw-r--r-- | 10786-0.txt | 524 |
1 files changed, 524 insertions, 0 deletions
diff --git a/10786-0.txt b/10786-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..11bbebc --- /dev/null +++ b/10786-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,524 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 10786 *** + +SAILORS' KNOTS + +By W.W. Jacobs + + +1909 + + + +ODD MAN OUT + + +The night watchman pursed up his lips and shook his head. Friendship, he +said, decidedly, is a deloosion and a snare. I've 'ad more friendships +in my life than most people--owing to being took a fancy to for some +reason or other--and they nearly all came to a sudden ending. + +[Illustration: "Friendship, he said, decidedly, is a deloosion and a +snare."] + +I remember one man who used to think I couldn't do wrong; everything I +did was right to 'im; and now if I pass 'im in the street he makes a face +as if he'd got a hair in 'is mouth. All because I told 'im the truth one +day when he was thinking of getting married. Being a bit uneasy-like in +his mind, he asked me 'ow, supposing I was a gal, his looks would strike +me. + +It was an orkard question, and I told him that he 'ad got a good 'art and +that no man could 'ave a better pal. I said he 'ad got a good temper and +was free with 'is money. O' course, that didn't satisfy 'im, and at last +he told me to take a good look at 'im and tell him wot I thought of 'is +looks. There was no getting out of it, and at last I 'ad to tell him +plain that everybody 'ad diff'rent ideas about looks; that looks wasn't +everything; and that 'andsome is as 'andsome does. Even then 'e wasn't +satisfied, and at last I told 'im, speaking as a pal to a pal, that if I +was a gal and he came along trying to court me, I should go to the police +about it. + +I remember two young fellers that was shipmates with me some years ago, +and they was such out-and-out pals that everybody called 'em the Siamese +twins. They always shipped together and shared lodgings together when +they was ashore, and Ted Denver would no more 'ave thought of going out +without Charlie Brice than Charlie Brice would 'ave thought of going out +without 'im. They shared their baccy and their money and everything +else, and it's my opinion that if they 'ad only 'ad one pair o' boots +between 'em they'd 'ave hopped along in one each. + +They 'ad been like it for years, and they kept it up when they left the +sea and got berths ashore. Anybody knowing them would ha' thought that +nothing but death could part 'em; but it happened otherwise. + +There was a gal in it, of course. A gal that Ted Denver got into +conversation with on top of a bus, owing to her steadying 'erself by +putting her hand on 'is shoulder as she passed 'im. Bright, lively sort +o' gal she seemed, and, afore Ted knew where he was, they was talking +away as though they 'ad known each other for years. + +Charlie didn't seem to care much for it at fust, but he didn't raise no +objection; and when the gal got up to go he stopped the bus for 'er by +poking the driver in the back, and they all got off together. Ted went +fust to break her fall, in case the bus started off too sudden, and +Charlie 'elped her down behind by catching hold of a lace collar she was +wearing. When she turned to speak to 'im about it, she knocked the +conductor's hat off with 'er umbrella, and there was so much +unpleasantness that by the time they 'ad got to the pavement she told +Charlie that she never wanted to see his silly fat face agin. + +"It ain't fat," ses Ted, speaking up for 'im; "it's the shape of it." + +"And it ain't silly," ses Charlie, speaking very quick; "mind that!" + +"It's a bit o' real lace," ses the gal, twisting her 'ead round to look +at the collar; "it cost me one and two-three only last night." + +"One an' _wot?_" ses Charlie, who, not being a married man, didn't +understand 'er. + +"One shilling," ses the gal, "two pennies, and three farthings. D'ye +understand that?" + +"Yes," ses Charlie. + +"He's cleverer than he looks," ses the gal, turning to Ted. "I s'pose +you're right, and it is the shape after all." + +Ted walked along one side of 'er and Charlie the other, till they came to +the corner of the road where she lived, and then Ted and 'er stood there +talking till Charlie got sick and tired of it, and kept tugging at Ted's +coat for 'im to come away. + +"I'm coming," ses Ted, at last. "I s'pose you won't be this way +to-morrow night?" he ses, turning to the gal. + +"I might if I thought there was no chance of seeing you," she ses, +tossing her 'ead. + +"You needn't be alarmed," ses Charlie, shoving in his oar; "we're going +to a music-'all to-morrow night." + +"Oh, go to your blessed music-'all," ses the gal to Ted; "I don't want +you." + +She turned round and a'most ran up the road, with Ted follering 'er and +begging of 'er not to be so hasty, and afore they parted she told 'im +that 'er name was. Emma White, and promised to meet 'im there the next +night at seven. + +O' course Mr. Charlie Brice turned up alongside o' Ted the next night, +and at fust Emma said she was going straight off 'ome agin. She did go +part o' the way, and then, when she found that Ted wouldn't send his mate +off, she came back and, woman-like, said as 'ow she wasn't going to go +'ome just to please Charlie Brice. She wouldn't speak a word to 'im, and +when they all went to the music-'all together she sat with her face +turned away from 'im and her elbow sticking in 'is chest. Doing that and +watching the performance at the same time gave 'er a stiff neck, and she +got in such a temper over it she wouldn't hardly speak to Ted, and when +Charlie--meaning well--told 'er to rub it with a bit o' mutton-fat she +nearly went off her 'ead. + +"Who asked you to come with us?" she ses, as soon as she could speak. +"'Ow dare you force yourself where you ain't wanted?" + +"Ted wants me," ses Charlie. + +"We've been together for years," ses Ted. "You'll like Charlie when you +get used to 'im--everybody does." + +"Not me!" ses Emma, with a shiver. "It gives me the fair creeps to look +at him. You'll 'ave to choose between us. If he comes, I sha'n't. +Which is it to be?" + +Neither of 'em answered 'er, but the next night they both turned up as +usual, and Emma White stood there looking at 'em and nearly crying with +temper. + +"'Ow would you like it if I brought another young lady with me?" she ses +to Ted. + +"It wouldn't make no difference to me," ses Ted. "Any friend o' yours is +welcome." + +Emma stood looking at 'em, and then she patted 'er eyes with a pocket- +'ankercher and began to look more cheerful. + +"You ain't the only one that has got a dear friend," she says, looking. +at 'im and wiping 'er lips with the 'ankercher. "I've got one, and if +Charlie Brice don't promise to stay at 'ome to-morrow night I'll bring +her with me." + +"Bring 'er, and welcome," ses Ted. + +"I sha'n't stay at 'ome for fifty dear friends," ses Charlie. + +"Have it your own way," ses Emma. "If you come, Sophy Jennings comes, +that's all." + +She was as good as 'er word, too, and next night when they turned up they +found Emma and 'er friend waiting for them. Charlie thought it was the +friend's mother at fust, but he found out arterwards that she was a +widder-woman. She had 'ad two husbands, and both of 'em 'ad passed away +with a smile on their face. She seemed to take a fancy to Charlie the +moment she set eyes on 'im, and two or three times, they'd 'ave lost Ted +and Emma if it hadn't been for 'im. + +[Illustration: "When they turned up they found Emma and 'er friend +waiting for them."] + +They did lose 'em the next night, and Charlie Brice 'ad Mrs. Jennings all +alone to himself for over a couple of hours walking up and down the +Commercial Road talking about the weather; Charles saying 'ow wet and +cold it, was, and thinking p'r'aps they 'ad better go off 'ome afore she +got a chill. + +He complained to Ted about it when 'e got 'ome, and Ted promised as it +shouldn't 'appen agin. He said that 'im and Emma 'ad been so busy +talking about getting married that he 'ad forgotten to keep an eye on +him. + +"Married!" ses Charlie, very upset. "Married! And wot's to become o' +me?" + +"Come and lodge with us," ses Ted. + +They shook hands on it, but Ted said they 'ad both better keep it to +themselves a bit and wait until Emma 'ad got more used to Charlie afore +they told her. Ted let 'er get used to 'im for three days more afore he +broke the news to 'er, and the way she went on was alarming. She went on +for over ten minutes without taking breath, and she was just going to +start again when Mrs. Jennings stopped her. + +"He's all right," she ses. "You leave 'im alone." + +"I'm not touching 'im," ses Emma, very scornful. + +"You leave 'im alone," ses Mrs. Jennings, taking hold of Charlie's arm. +"I don't say things about your young man." + +Charlie Brice started as if he 'ad been shot, and twice he opened 'is +mouth to speak and show Mrs. Jennings 'er mistake; but, wot with trying +to find 'is voice in the fust place, and then finding words to use it +with in the second, he didn't say anything. He just walked along +gasping, with 'is mouth open like a fish. + +"Don't take no notice of 'er, Charlie," ses Mrs. Jennings. + +"I--I don't mind wot she ses," ses pore Charlie; "but you're making a +great----" + +"She's quick-tempered, is Emma," ses Mrs. Jennings. "But, there, so am +I. Wot you might call a generous temper, but quick." + +Charlie went cold all over. + +"Treat me well and I treat other people well," ses Mrs. Jennings. "I +can't say fairer than that, can I?" + +Charlie said "Nobody could," and then 'e walked along with her hanging on +to 'is arm, arf wondering whether it would be wrong to shove 'er under a +bus that was passing, and arf wondering whether 'e could do it if it +wasn't. + +"As for Emma saying she won't 'ave you for a lodger," ses Mrs. Jennings, +"let 'er wait till she's asked. She'll wait a long time if I 'ave my +say." + +Charlie didn't answer her. He walked along with 'is mouth shut, his idea +being that the least said the soonest mended. Even Emma asked 'im at +last whether he 'ad lost 'is tongue, and said it was curious 'ow +different love took different people. + +He talked fast enough going 'ome with Ted though, and pretty near lost +'is temper with 'im when Ted asked 'im why he didn't tell Mrs. Jennings +straight that she 'ad made a mistake. + +"She knows well enough," he says, grinding 'is teeth; "she was just +trying it on. That's 'ow it is widders get married agin. You'll 'ave to +choose between going out with me or Emma, Ted. I can't face Mrs. +Jennings again. I didn't think anybody could 'ave parted us like that." + +Ted said it was all nonsense, but it was no good, and the next night he +went off alone and came back very cross, saying that Mrs. Jennings 'ad +been with 'em all the time, and when 'e spoke to Emma about it she said +it was just tit for tat, and reminded 'im 'ow she had 'ad to put up with +Charlie. For four nights running 'e went out for walks, with Emma +holding one of 'is arms and Mrs. Jennings the other. + +"It's miserable for you all alone 'ere by yourself; Charlie," he ses. +"Why not come? She can't marry you against your will. Besides, I miss +you." + +Charlie shook 'ands with 'im, but 'e said 'e wouldn't walk out with Mrs. +Jennings for a fortune. And all that Ted could say made no difference. +He stayed indoors of an evening reading the paper, or going for little +walks by 'imseif, until at last Ted came 'ome one evening, smiling all +over his face, and told 'im they had both been making fools of themselves +for nothing. + +"Mrs. Jennings is going to be married," he ses, clapping Charlie on the +back. + +"_Wot?_" ses Charlie. + +Ted nodded. "Her and Emma 'ad words to-night," he ses, laughing, "and it +all come out. She's been keeping company for some time. He's away at +present, and they're going to be married as soon as 'e comes back." + +"Well," ses Charlie, "why did she----" + +"To oblige Emma," ses Ted, "to frighten you into staying at 'ome. I'd +'ad my suspicions for some time, from one or two things I picked up." + +"Ho!" ses Charlie. "Well, it'll be my turn to laugh to-morrow night. +We'll see whether she can shake me off agin." + +Ted looked at 'im a bit worried. "It's a bit orkard," he ses, speaking +very slow. "You see, they made it up arterwards, and then they both made +me promise not to tell you, and if you come, they'll know I 'ave." + +Charlie did a bit o' thinking. "Not if I pretend to make love to Mrs. +Jennings?" he ses, at last, winking at 'im. "And it'll serve her right +for being deceitful. We'll see 'ow she likes it. Wot sort o' chap is +the young man--big?" + +"Can't be," ses Ted; "cos Emma called 'im a little shrimp." + +"I'll come," ses Charlie; "and it'll be your own fault if they find out +you told me about it." + +They fell asleep talking of it, and the next evening Charlie put on a new +neck-tie he 'ad bought, and arter letting Ted have arf an hour's start +went out and met 'em accidental. The fust Mrs. Jennings knew of 'is +being there was by finding an arm put round 'er waist. + +"Good-evening, Sophy," he ses. + +"'Ow--'ow dare you?" ses Mrs. Jennings, giving a scream and pushing him +away. + +Charlie looked surprised. + +"Why, ain't you pleased to see me?" he ses. "I've 'ad the raging +toothache for over a week; I've got it now a bit, but I couldn't stay +away from you any longer." + +"You behave yourself," ses Mrs. Jennings. + +"Ted didn't say anything about your toothache," ses Emma. + +"I wouldn't let 'im, for fear of alarming Sophy," ses Charlie. + +Mrs. Jennings gave a sort of laugh and a sniff mixed. + +"Ain't you pleased to see me agin?" ses Charlie. + +"I don't want to see you," ses Mrs. Jennings. "Wot d'ye think I want to +see you for?" + +"Change your mind pretty quick, don't you?" ses Charlie. "It's blow 'ot +and blow cold with you seemingly. Why, I've been counting the minutes +till I should see you agin." + +Mrs. Jennings told 'im not to make a fool of 'imself, and Charlie saw 'er +look at Emma in a puzzled sort of way, as if she didn't know wot to make +of it. She kept drawing away from 'im and he kept drawing close to 'er; +other people on the pavement dodging and trying to get out of their way, +and asking them which side they was going and to stick to it. + +"Why don't you behave yourself?" ses Emma, at last. + +"We're all right," ses Charlie; "you look arter your own young man. We +can look arter ourselves." + +"Speak for yourself," ses Mrs. Jennings, very sharp. + +Charlie laughed, and the more Mrs. Jennings showed 'er dislike for 'is +nonsense the more he gave way to it. Even Ted thought it was going too +far, and tried to interfere when he put his arm round Mrs. Jennings's +waist and made 'er dance to a piano-organ; but there was no stopping 'im, +and at last Mrs. Jennings said she had 'ad enough of it, and told Emma +she was going off 'ome. + +[Illustration: "He put his arm round Mrs. Jennings's waist and made 'er +dance to a piano-organ."] + +"Don't take no notice of 'im," ses Emma. + +"I must," ses Mrs. Jennings, who was arf crying with rage. + +"Well, if you go 'ome, I shall go," ses Emma. "I don't want 'is company. +I believe he's doing it on purpose. + +"Behave yourself, Charlie," ses Ted. + +"All right, old man," ses Charlie. "You look arter your young woman and +I'll look arter mine." + +"Your wot?" ses Mrs. Jennings, very loud. + +"My young woman," ses Charlie. + +"Look 'ere," ses Emma. "You may as well know first as last--Sophy 'as +got a young man." + +"O' course she 'as," ses Charlie. "Twenty-seven on the second of next +January, he is; same as me." + +"She's going to be married," ses Emma, very solemn. + +"Yes, to me," ses Charlie, pretending to be surprised. "Didn't you know +that?" + +He looked so pleased with 'imself at his cleverness that Emma arf put up +her 'and, and then she thought better of it and turned away. + +"He's just doing it to get rid of you," she ses to Mrs. Jennings, "and if +you give way you're a bigger silly than I took you for. Let 'im go on +and 'ave his own way, and tell your intended about 'im when you see 'im. +Arter all, you started it." + +"I was only 'aving a bit o' fun," ses Mrs. Jennings. + +"Well, so is he," ses Emma. + +"Not me!" ses Charlie, turning his eyes up. "I'm in dead earnest; and so +is she. It's only shyness on 'er part; it'll soon wear off." + +He took 'old of Mrs. Jennings's arm agin and began to tell 'er 'ow lonely +'is life was afore she came acrost his path like an angel that had lost +its way. And he went on like that till she told Emma that she'd either +'ave to go off 'ome or scream. Ted interfered agin then, and, arter +listening to wot he 'ad got to say, Charlie said as 'ow he'd try and keep +his love under control a bit more. + +"She won't stand much more of it," he ses to Ted, arter they 'ad got 'ome +that night. "I shouldn't be surprised if she don't turn up to-morrow." + +Ted shook his 'ead. "She'll turn up to oblige Emma," he ses; "but +there's no need for you to overdo it, Charlie. If her young man 'appened +to get to 'ear of it it might cause trouble." + +"I ain't afraid of 'im," ses Charlie, "not if your description of 'im is +right." + +"Emma knows 'im," ses Ted, "and I know she don't think much of 'im. She +says he ain't as big as I am." + +Charlie smiled to himself and laid awake for a little while thinking of +pet names to surprise Mrs. Jennings with. He called 'er a fresh one +every night for a week, and every night he took 'er a little bunch o' +flowers with 'is love. When she flung 'em on the pavement he pretended +to think she 'ad dropped 'em; but, do wot he would, 'e couldn't frighten +'er into staying away, and 'is share of music-'alls and bus rides and +things like that was more than 'e cared to think of. All the time Ted +was as happy as a sand-boy, and one evening when Emma asked 'im to go +'ome to supper 'e was so pleased 'e could 'ardly speak. + +"Father thought he'd like to see you," ses Emma. "I shall be proud to +shake 'im by the 'and," ses Ted, going red with joy. + +"And you're to come, too, Sophy," ses Emma, turning to Mrs. Jennings. + +Charlie coughed, feeling a bit orkard-like, and Emma stood there as if +waiting for 'im to go. + +"Well, so long," ses Charlie at last. "Take care o' my little prize +packet." + +"You can come, too, if you like," ses Emma. "Father said I was to bring +you. Don't 'ave none of your nonsense there, that's all." + +Charlie thanked 'er, and they was all walking along, him and Mrs. +Jennings behind, when Emma looked over 'er shoulder. + +"Sophy's young man is coming," she ses. + +"Ho!" ses Charlie. He walked along doing a bit o' thinking, and by and +by 'e gives a little laugh, and he ses, "I--I don't think p'r'aps I'll +come arter all." + +"Afraid?" ses Emma, with a nasty laugh. + +"No," ses Charlie. + +"Well, it looks like it," ses Emma. + +"He's brave enough where wimmen are concerned," ses Mrs. Jennings. + +"I was thinking of you," ses Charlie. + +"You needn't trouble about me," ses Mrs. Jennings. "I can look after +myself, thank you." + +Charlie looked round, but there was no help for it. He got as far away +from Mrs. Jennings as possible, and when they got to Emma's house he went +in last. + +Emma's father and mother was there and two or three of 'er brothers and +sisters, but the fust thing that Charlie noticed was a great lump of a +man standing by the mantelpiece staring at 'im. + +"Come in, and make yourselves at 'ome," ses Mr. White. "I'm glad to see +you both. Emma 'as told me all about you." + +Charlie's 'art went down into 'is boots, but every-body was so busy +drawing their chairs up to the table that they didn't notice 'ow pale he +'ad gone. He sat between Mr. White and Mrs. Jennings, and by and by, +when everybody was talking, he turned to 'im in a whisper, and asked 'im +who the big chap was. + +"Mrs. Jennings's brother," ses Mr. White; "brewer's drayman he is." + +Charlie said, "Oh!" and went on eating, a bit relieved in 'is mind. + +"Your friend and my gal 'll make a nice couple," ses Mr. White, looking +at Ted and Emma, sitting 'and in 'and. + +"She couldn't 'ave a better husband," ses Charlie, whispering again; "but +where is Mrs. Jennings's young man? I 'eard he was to be here." + +Mr. White put down 'is knife and fork. "Eh?" he ses, staring at 'im. + +"Mrs. Jennings's intended?" ses Charlie. + +"Who are you getting at?" ses Mr. White, winking at 'im. + +"But she 'as got one, ain't she?" ses Charlie. "That'll do," ses Mr. +White, with another wink. "Try it on somebody else." + +"Wot are you two talking about?" ses Emma, who 'ad been watching 'em. + +"He's trying to pull my leg," ses 'er father, smiling all over his face. +"Been asking me where Mrs. Jennings's young man is. P'r'aps you oughtn't +to 'ave told us yet, Emma." + +"It's all right," ses Emma. "He's got a very jealous disposition, poor +fellow; and me and Sophy have been telling 'im about a young man just to +tease 'im. We've been describing him to 'imself all along, and he +thought it was somebody else." + +She caught Charlie's eye, and all in a flash he saw 'ow he 'ad been done. +Some of 'em began to laugh, and Mrs. Jennings put her 'and on his and +gave it a squeeze. He sat there struck all of a heap, wondering wot he +was going to do, and just at that moment there was a knock at the street +door. + +"I'll open it," he ses. + +He jumped up before anybody could stop 'im and went to the door. Two +seconds arter Ted Denver followed 'im, and that is last he ever saw of +Charlie Brice, he was running down the road without 'is hat as hard as he +could run. + +[Illustration: "He was running down the road without 'is hat as hard as +he could run."] + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Odd Man Out, by W.W. Jacobs + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 10786 *** |