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authorRoger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org>2025-10-15 04:34:43 -0700
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+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 10571 ***
+
+SHIP'S COMPANY
+
+By W.W. Jacobs
+
+
+
+THE OLD MAN OF THE SEA
+
+
+"What I want you to do," said Mr. George Wright, as he leaned towards the
+old sailor, "is to be an uncle to me."
+
+"Aye, aye," said the mystified Mr. Kemp, pausing with a mug of beer
+midway to his lips.
+
+"A rich uncle," continued the young man, lowering his voice to prevent
+any keen ears in the next bar from acquiring useless knowledge. "An
+uncle from New Zealand, who is going to leave me all 'is money."
+
+"Where's it coming from?" demanded Mr. Kemp, with a little excitement.
+
+"It ain't coming," was the reply. "You've only got to say you've got it.
+Fact of the matter is, I've got my eye on a young lady; there's another
+chap after 'er too, and if she thought I'd got a rich uncle it might make
+all the difference. She knows I 'ad an uncle that went to New Zealand
+and was never heard of since. That's what made me think of it."
+
+Mr. Kemp drank his beer in thoughtful silence. "How can I be a rich
+uncle without any brass?" he inquired at length.
+
+"I should 'ave to lend you some--a little," said Mr. Wright.
+
+[Illustration: "What I want you to do," said Mr. George Wright, "is to
+be an uncle to me."]
+
+The old man pondered. "I've had money lent me before," he said,
+candidly, "but I can't call to mind ever paying it back. I always meant
+to, but that's as far as it got."
+
+"It don't matter," said the other. "It'll only be for a little while,
+and then you'll 'ave a letter calling you back to New Zealand. See? And
+you'll go back, promising to come home in a year's time, after you've
+wound up your business, and leave us all your money. See?"
+
+Mr. Kemp scratched the back of his neck. "But she's sure to find it out
+in time," he objected.
+
+"P'r'aps," said Mr. Wright. "And p'r'aps not. There'll be plenty of
+time for me to get married before she does, and you could write back and
+say you had got married yourself, or given your money to a hospital."
+
+He ordered some more beer for Mr. Kemp, and in a low voice gave him as
+much of the family history as he considered necessary.
+
+"I've only known you for about ten days," he concluded, "but I'd sooner
+trust you than people I've known for years."
+
+"I took a fancy to you the moment I set eyes on you," rejoined Mr. Kemp.
+"You're the living image of a young fellow that lent me five pounds once,
+and was drowned afore my eyes the week after. He 'ad a bit of a squint,
+and I s'pose that's how he came to fall overboard."
+
+He emptied his mug, and then, accompanied by Mr. Wright, fetched his sea-
+chest from the boarding-house where he was staying, and took it to the
+young man's lodgings. Fortunately for the latter's pocket the chest
+contained a good best suit and boots, and the only expenses incurred were
+for a large, soft felt hat and a gilded watch and chain. Dressed in his
+best, with a bulging pocket-book in his breast-pocket, he set out with
+Mr. Wright on the following evening to make his first call.
+
+Mr. Wright, who was also in his best clothes, led the way to a small
+tobacconist's in a side street off the Mile End Road, and, raising his
+hat with some ceremony, shook hands with a good-looking young woman who
+stood behind the counter: Mr. Kemp, adopting an air of scornful dignity
+intended to indicate the possession of great wealth, waited.
+
+"This is my uncle," said Mr. Wright, speaking rapidly, "from New Zealand,
+the one I spoke to you about. He turned up last night, and you might
+have knocked me down with a feather. The last person in the world I
+expected to see."
+
+Mr. Kemp, in a good rolling voice, said, "Good evening, miss; I hope you
+are well," and, subsiding into a chair, asked for a cigar. His surprise
+when he found that the best cigar they stocked only cost sixpence almost
+assumed the dimensions of a grievance.
+
+"It'll do to go on with," he said, smelling it suspiciously. "Have you
+got change for a fifty-pound note?"
+
+Miss Bradshaw, concealing her surprise by an effort, said that she would
+see, and was scanning the contents of a drawer, when Mr. Kemp in some
+haste discovered a few odd sovereigns in his waistcoat-pocket. Five
+minutes later he was sitting in the little room behind the shop, holding
+forth to an admiring audience.
+
+"So far as I know," he said, in reply to a question of Mrs. Bradshaw's,
+"George is the only relation I've got. Him and me are quite alone, and I
+can tell you I was glad to find him."
+
+Mrs. Bradshaw sighed. "It's a pity you are so far apart," she said.
+
+"It's not for long," said Mr. Kemp. "I'm just going back for about a
+year to wind up things out there, and then I'm coming back to leave my
+old bones over here. George has very kindly offered to let me live with
+him."
+
+"He won't suffer for it, I'll be bound," said Mrs. Bradshaw, archly.
+
+"So far as money goes he won't," said the old man. "Not that that would
+make any difference to George."
+
+"It would be the same to me if you hadn't got a farthing," said Mr.
+Wright, promptly.
+
+[Illustration: "It'll do to go on with," he said]
+
+Mr. Kemp, somewhat affected, shook hands with him, and leaning back in
+the most comfortable chair in the room, described his life and struggles
+in New Zealand. Hard work, teetotalism, and the simple life combined
+appeared to be responsible for a fortune which he affected to be too old
+to enjoy. Misunderstandings of a painful nature were avoided by a timely
+admission that under medical advice he was now taking a fair amount of
+stimulant.
+
+[Illustration: "'Ow much did you say you'd got in the bank?"]
+
+"Mind," he said, as he walked home with the elated George, "it's your
+game, not mine, and it's sure to come a bit expensive. I can't be a rich
+uncle without spending a bit. 'Ow much did you say you'd got in the
+bank?"
+
+"We must be as careful as we can," said Mr. Wright, hastily. "One thing
+is they can't leave the shop to go out much. It's a very good little
+business, and it ought to be all right for me and Bella one of these
+days, eh?"
+
+Mr. Kemp, prompted by a nudge in the ribs, assented. "It's wonderful how
+they took it all in about me," he said; "but I feel certain in my own
+mind that I ought to chuck some money about."
+
+"Tell 'em of the money you have chucked about," said Mr. Wright. "It'll
+do just as well, and come a good deal cheaper. And you had better go
+round alone to-morrow evening. It'll look better. Just go in for
+another one of their sixpenny cigars."
+
+Mr. Kemp obeyed, and the following evening, after sitting a little while
+chatting in the shop, was invited into the parlour, where, mindful of Mr.
+Wright's instructions, he held his listeners enthralled by tales of past
+expenditure. A tip of fifty pounds to his bedroom steward coming over
+was characterized by Mrs. Bradshaw as extravagant.
+
+"Seems to be going all right," said Mr. Wright, as the old man made his
+report; "but be careful; don't go overdoing it."
+
+Mr. Kemp nodded. "I can turn 'em round my little finger," he said.
+"You'll have Bella all to yourself to-morrow evening."
+
+Mr. Wright flushed. "How did you manage that?" he inquired. "It's the
+first time she has ever been out with me alone."
+
+"She ain't coming out," said Mr. Kemp. "She's going to stay at home and
+mind the shop; it's the mother what's coming out. Going to spend the
+evening with me!"
+
+Mr. Wright frowned. "What did you do that for?" he demanded, hotly.
+
+"I didn't do it," said Mr. Kemp, equably; "they done it. The old lady
+says that, just for once in her life, she wants to see how it feels to
+spend money like water."
+
+"<i>Money like water!</i>" repeated the horrified Mr. Wright. "Money like--
+I'll 'money' her--I'll----"
+
+"It don't matter to me," said Mr. Kemp. "I can have a headache or a
+chill, or something of that sort, if you like. I don't want to go. It's
+no pleasure to me."
+
+"What will it cost?" demanded Mr. Wright, pacing up and down the room.
+
+The rich uncle made a calculation. "She wants to go to a place called
+the Empire," he said, slowly, "and have something for supper, and there'd
+be cabs and things. I dessay it would cost a couple o' pounds, and it
+might be more. But I'd just as soon ave' a chill--just."
+
+Mr. Wright groaned, and after talking of Mrs. Bradshaw as though she were
+already his mother-in-law, produced the money. His instructions as to
+economy lasted almost up to the moment when he stood with Bella outside
+the shop on the following evening and watched the couple go off.
+
+"It's wonderful how well they get on together," said Bella, as they
+re-entered the shop and passed into the parlour. "I've never seen mother
+take to anybody so quick as she has to him."
+
+"I hope you like him, too," said Mr. Wright.
+
+"He's a dear," said Bella. "Fancy having all that money. I wonder what
+it feels like?"
+
+"I suppose I shall know some day," said the young man, slowly; "but it
+won't be much good to me unless----"
+
+"Unless?" said Bella, after a pause.
+
+"Unless it gives me what I want," replied the other. "I'd sooner be a
+poor man and married to the girl I love, than a millionaire."
+
+Miss Bradshaw stole an uneasy glance at his somewhat sallow features, and
+became thoughtful.
+
+"It's no good having diamonds and motor-cars and that sort of thing
+unless you have somebody to share them with," pursued Mr. Wright.
+
+Miss Bradshaw's eyes sparkled, and at that moment the shop-bell tinkled
+and a lively whistle sounded. She rose and went into the shop, and Mr.
+Wright settled back in his chair and scowled darkly as he saw the
+intruder.
+
+"Good evening," said the latter. "I want a sixpenny smoke for twopence,
+please. How are we this evening? Sitting up and taking nourishment?"
+
+Miss Bradshaw told him to behave himself.
+
+"Always do," said the young man. "That's why I can never get anybody to
+play with. I had such an awful dream about you last night that I
+couldn't rest till I saw you. Awful it was."
+
+"What was it?" inquired Miss Bradshaw.
+
+"Dreamt you were married," said Mr. Hills, smiling at her.
+
+Miss Bradshaw tossed her head. "Who to, pray?" she inquired.
+
+"Me," said Mr. Hills, simply. "I woke up in a cold perspiration.
+Halloa! is that Georgie in there? How are you, George? Better?"
+
+"I'm all right," said Mr. Wright, with dignity, as the other hooked the
+door open with his stick and nodded at him.
+
+"Well, why don't you look it?" demanded the lively Mr. Hills. "Have you
+got your feet wet, or what?"
+
+"Oh, be quiet," said Miss Bradshaw, smiling at him.
+
+"Right-o," said Mr. Hills, dropping into a chair by the counter and
+caressing his moustache. "But you wouldn't speak to me like that if you
+knew what a terrible day I've had."
+
+"What have you been doing?" asked the girl.
+
+"Working," said the other, with a huge sigh. "Where's the millionaire?
+I came round on purpose to have a look at him."
+
+"Him and mother have gone to the Empire?" said Miss Bradshaw.
+
+Mr. Hills gave three long, penetrating whistles, and then, placing his
+cigar with great care on the counter, hid his face in a huge
+handkerchief. Miss Bradshaw, glanced from him to the frowning Mr.
+Wright, and then, entering the parlour, closed the door with a bang. Mr.
+Hills took the hint, and with a somewhat thoughtful grin departed.
+
+He came in next evening for another cigar, and heard all that there was
+to hear about the Empire. Mrs. Bradshaw would have treated him but
+coldly, but the innocent Mr. Kemp, charmed by his manner, paid him great
+attention.
+
+"He's just like what I was at his age," he said. "Lively."
+
+"I'm not a patch on you," said Mr. Hills, edging his way by slow degrees
+into the parlour. "I don't take young ladies to the Empire. Were you
+telling me you came over here to get married, or did I dream it?"
+
+"'Ark at him," said the blushing Mr. Kemp, as Mrs. Bradshaw shook her
+head at the offender and told him to behave himself.
+
+"He's a man any woman might be happy with," said Mr. Hills. "He never
+knows how much there is in his trousers-pocket. Fancy sewing on buttons
+for a man like that. Gold-mining ain't in it."
+
+Mrs. Bradshaw shook her head at him again, and Mr. Hills, after
+apologizing to her for revealing her innermost thoughts before the most
+guileless of men, began to question Mr. Kemp as to the prospects of a
+bright and energetic young man, with a distaste for work, in New Zealand.
+The audience listened with keen attention to the replies, the only
+disturbing factor being a cough of Mr. Wright's, which became more and
+more troublesome as the evening wore on. By the time uncle and nephew
+rose to depart the latter was so hoarse that he could scarcely speak.
+
+"Why didn't you tell 'em you had got a letter calling you home, as I told
+you?" he vociferated, as soon as they were clear of the shop.
+
+"I--I forgot it," said the old man.
+
+"Forgot it!" repeated the incensed Mr. Wright.
+
+"What did you think I was coughing like that for--fun?"
+
+"I forgot it," said the old man, doggedly. "Besides, if you take my
+advice, you'd better let me stay a little longer to make sure of things."
+
+Mr. Wright laughed disagreeably. "I dare say," he said; "but I am
+managing this affair, not you. Now, you go round to-morrow afternoon and
+tell them you're off. D'ye hear? D'ye think I'm made of money? And
+what do you mean by making such a fuss of that fool, Charlie Hills? You
+know he is after Bella."
+
+He walked the rest of the way home in indignant silence, and, after
+giving minute instructions to Mr. Kemp next morning at breakfast, went
+off to work in a more cheerful frame of mind. Mr. Kemp was out when he
+returned, and after making his toilet he followed him to Mrs. Bradshaw's.
+
+To his annoyance, he found Mr. Hills there again; and, moreover, it soon
+became clear to him that Mr. Kemp had said nothing about his approaching
+departure. Coughs and scowls passed unheeded, and at last in a
+hesitating voice, he broached the subject himself. There was a general
+chorus of lamentation.
+
+"I hadn't got the heart to tell you," said Mr. Kemp. "I don't know when
+I've been so happy."
+
+"But you haven't got to go back immediate," said Mrs. Bradshaw.
+
+"To-morrow," said Mr. Wright, before the old man could reply.
+"Business."
+
+"Must you go," said Mrs. Bradshaw.
+
+Mr. Kemp smiled feebly. "I suppose I ought to," he replied, in a
+hesitating voice.
+
+"Take my tip and give yourself a bit of a holiday before you go back,"
+urged Mr. Hills.
+
+"Just for a few days," pleaded Bella.
+
+"To please us," said Mrs. Bradshaw. "Think 'ow George'll miss you."
+
+"Lay hold of him and don't let him go," said Mr. Hills.
+
+He took Mr. Kemp round the waist, and the laughing Bella and her mother
+each secured an arm. An appeal to Mr. Wright to secure his legs passed
+unheeded.
+
+"We don't let you go till you promise," said Mrs. Bradshaw.
+
+Mr. Kemp smiled and shook his head. "Promise?" said Bella.
+
+"Well, well," said Mr. Kemp; "p'r'aps--"
+
+"He must go back," shouted the alarmed Mr. Wright.
+
+"Let him speak for himself," exclaimed Bella, indignantly.
+
+"Just another week then," said Mr. Kemp. "It's no good having money if I
+can't please myself."
+
+"A week!" shouted Mr. Wright, almost beside himself with rage and dismay.
+"A week! Another week! Why, you told me----"
+
+"Oh, don't listen to him," said Mrs. Bradshaw. "Croaker! It's his own
+business, ain't it? And he knows best, don't he? What's it got to do
+with you?"
+
+She patted Mr. Kemp's hand; Mr. Kemp patted back, and with his disengaged
+hand helped himself to a glass of beer--the fourth--and beamed in a
+friendly fashion upon the company.
+
+"George!" he said, suddenly.
+
+"Yes," said Mr. Wright, in a harsh voice.
+
+"Did you think to bring my pocket-book along with you?"
+
+"No," said Mr. Wright, sharply; "I didn't."
+
+"Tt-tt," said the old man, with a gesture of annoyance. "Well, lend me a
+couple of pounds, then, or else run back and fetch my pocket-book," he
+added, with a sly grin.
+
+Mr. Wright's face worked with impotent fury. "What--what--do you--want
+it for?" he gasped.
+
+Mrs. Bradshaw's "Well! Well!" seemed to sum up the general feeling; Mr.
+Kemp, shaking his head, eyed him with gentle reproach.
+
+"Me and Mrs. Bradshaw are going to gave another evening out," he said,
+quietly. "I've only got a few more days, and I must make hay while the
+sun shines."
+
+To Mr. Wright the room seemed to revolve slowly on its axis, but,
+regaining his self-possession by a supreme effort, he took out his purse
+and produced the amount. Mrs. Bradshaw, after a few feminine
+protestations, went upstairs to put her bonnet on.
+
+"And you can go and fetch a hansom-cab, George, while she's a-doing of
+it," said Mr. Kemp. "Pick out a good 'orse--spotted-grey, if you can."
+
+Mr. Wright arose and, departing with a suddenness that was almost
+startling, exploded harmlessly in front of the barber's, next door but
+one. Then with lagging steps he went in search of the shabbiest cab and
+oldest horse he could find.
+
+"Thankee, my boy," said Mr. Kemp, bluffly, as he helped Mrs. Bradshaw in
+and stood with his foot on the step. "By the way, you had better go back
+and lock my pocket-book up. I left it on the washstand, and there's best
+part of a thousand pounds in it. You can take fifty for yourself to buy
+smokes with."
+
+There was a murmur of admiration, and Mr. Wright, with a frantic attempt
+to keep up appearances, tried to thank him, but in vain. Long after the
+cab had rolled away he stood on the pavement trying to think out a
+position which was rapidly becoming unendurable. Still keeping up
+appearances, he had to pretend to go home to look after the pocket-book,
+leaving the jubilant Mr. Hills to improve the shining hour with Miss
+Bradshaw.
+
+Mr. Kemp, returning home at midnight--in a cab--found the young man
+waiting up for him, and, taking a seat on the edge of the table, listened
+unmoved to a word-picture of himself which seemed interminable. He was
+only moved to speech when Mr. Wright described him as a white-whiskered
+jezebel who was a disgrace to his sex, and then merely in the interests
+of natural science.
+
+"Don't you worry," he said, as the other paused from exhaustion. "It
+won't be for long now."
+
+"Long?" said Mr. Wright, panting. "First thing to-morrow morning you
+have a telegram calling you back--a telegram that must be minded. D'ye
+see?"
+
+"No, I don't," said Mr. Kemp, plainly. "I'm not going back, never no
+more--never! I'm going to stop here and court Mrs. Bradshaw."
+
+Mr. Wright fought for breath. "You--you can't!" he gasped.
+
+"I'm going to have a try," said the old man. "I'm sick of going to sea,
+and it'll be a nice comfortable home for my old age. You marry Bella,
+and I'll marry her mother. Happy family!"
+
+Mr. Wright, trembling with rage, sat down to recover, and, regaining his
+composure after a time, pointed out almost calmly the various
+difficulties in the way.
+
+"I've thought it all out," said Mr. Kemp, nodding. "She mustn't know I'm
+not rich till after we're married; then I 'ave a letter from New Zealand
+saying I've lost all my money. It's just as easy to have that letter as
+the one you spoke of."
+
+"And I'm to find you money to play the rich uncle with till you're
+married, I suppose," said Mr. Wright, in a grating voice, "and then lose
+Bella when Mrs. Bradshaw finds you've lost your money?"
+
+Mr. Kemp scratched his ear. "That's your lookout," he said, at last.
+
+"Now, look here," said Mr. Wright, with great determination. "Either you
+go and tell them that you've been telegraphed for--cabled is the proper
+word--or I tell them the truth."
+
+"That'll settle you then," said Mr. Kemp.
+
+"No more than the other would," retorted the young man, "and it'll come
+cheaper. One thing I'll take my oath of, and that is I won't give you
+another farthing; but if you do as I tell you I'll give you a quid for
+luck. Now, think it over."
+
+Mr. Kemp thought it over, and after a vain attempt to raise the promised
+reward to five pounds, finally compounded for two, and went off to bed
+after a few stormy words on selfishness and ingratitude. He declined to
+speak to his host at breakfast next morning, and accompanied him in the
+evening with the air of a martyr going to the stake. He listened in
+stony silence to the young man's instructions, and only spoke when the
+latter refused to pay the two pounds in advance.
+
+The news, communicated in halting accents by Mr. Kemp, was received with
+flattering dismay. Mrs. Bradshaw refused to believe her ears, and it was
+only after the information had been repeated and confirmed by Mr. Wright
+that she understood.
+
+"I must go," said Mr. Kemp. "I've spent over eleven pounds cabling
+to-day; but it's all no good."
+
+"But you're coming back?" said Mr. Hills.
+
+"O' course I am," was the reply. "George is the only relation I've got,
+and I've got to look after him, I suppose. After all, blood is thicker
+than water."
+
+"Hear, hear!" said Mrs. Bradshaw, piously.
+
+"And there's you and Bella," continued Mr. Kemp; "two of the best that
+ever breathed."
+
+The ladies looked down.
+
+"And Charlie Hills; I don't know--I don't know <i>when</i> I've took such a
+fancy to anybody as I have to 'im. If I was a young gal--a single young
+gal--he's--the other half," he said, slowly, as he paused--"just the one I
+should fancy. He's a good-'arted, good-looking----"
+
+"Draw it mild," interrupted the blushing Mr. Hills as Mr. Wright bestowed
+a ferocious glance upon the speaker.
+
+"Clever, lively young fellow," concluded Mr. Kemp. "George!"
+
+"Yes," said Mr. Wright.
+
+"I'm going now. I've got to catch the train for Southampton, but I don't
+want you to come with me. I prefer to be alone. You stay here and cheer
+them up. Oh, and before I forget it, lend me a couple o' pounds out o'
+that fifty I gave you last night. I've given all my small change away."
+
+He looked up and met Mr. Wright's eye; the latter, too affected to speak,
+took out the money and passed it over.
+
+"We never know what may happen to us," said the old man, solemnly, as he
+rose and buttoned his coat. "I'm an old man and I like to have things
+ship-shape. I've spent nearly the whole day with my lawyer, and if
+anything 'appens to my old carcass it won't make any difference. I have
+left half my money to George; half of all I have is to be his."
+
+In the midst of an awed silence he went round and shook hands.
+
+"The other half," with his hand on the door--"the other half and my best
+gold watch and chain I have left to my dear young pal, Charlie Hills.
+Good-bye, Georgie!"
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Old Man of the Sea, by W.W. Jacobs
+
+*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 10571 ***