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authorRoger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org>2025-10-15 05:31:50 -0700
committerRoger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org>2025-10-15 05:31:50 -0700
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+<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.01 Transitional//EN">
+<html>
+<head>
+<title>Roughing It, Part 6</title>
+<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=iso-8859-1">
+
+<style type="text/css">
+ <!--
+ body {background:#faebd7; margin:10%; text-align:justify}
+ P { text-indent: 1em;
+ margin-top: .75em;
+ margin-bottom: .75em; }
+ H1,H2,H3,H4,H5,H6 { text-align: center; }
+ HR { width: 33%; text-align: center; }
+ blockquote {font-size: 97% }
+ .figleft {float: left;}
+ .figright {float: right;}
+ .toc { margin-left: 15%; margin-bottom: 0em;}
+ CENTER { padding: 10px;}
+ // -->
+</style>
+
+</head>
+<body>
+
+<h2>ROUGHING It, By Mark Twain, Part 6 </h2>
+<pre>
+
+Project Gutenberg's Roughing It, Part 6., by Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens)
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Roughing It, Part 6.
+
+Author: Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens)
+
+Release Date: July 2, 2004 [EBook #8587]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ROUGHING IT, PART 6. ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by David Widger
+
+
+
+
+
+</pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+<br>
+<hr>
+<br><br><br><br><br><br>
+
+
+<center><img alt="cover.jpg (90K)" src="images/cover.jpg" height="1071" width="733"></center>
+<br><br><br><br>
+<center><img alt="spine.jpg (54K)" src="images/spine.jpg" height="1071" width="307"></center>
+<br><br><br><br>
+<center>
+<h1>ROUGHING IT, Part 6</h1>
+<br><br>
+<h2>By Mark Twain</h2>
+</center>
+<br><br><br><br>
+<center><img alt="frontispiece1.jpg (168K)" src="images/frontispiece1.jpg" height="643" width="903"></center>
+<br><br><br><br>
+<a name="frontispiece2"></a>
+<center><img alt="frontispiece2.jpg (184K)" src="images/frontispiece2.jpg" height="1020" width="600"></center>
+<br><br><br><br>
+<center><img alt="titlepage.jpg (95K)" src="images/titlepage.jpg" height="1064" width="705"></center>
+<br><br><br><br>
+<center><img alt="dedication.jpg (18K)" src="images/dedication.jpg" height="273" width="425"></center>
+
+<br><br><br><br>
+<center><h2>PREFATORY.</h2> </center>
+<br>
+<p>This book is merely a personal narrative, and not a
+pretentious history or a philosophical dissertation. It is a
+record of several years of variegated vagabondizing, and its
+object is rather to help the resting reader while away an idle
+hour than afflict him with metaphysics, or goad him with science.
+Still, there is information in the volume; information concerning
+an interesting episode in the history of the Far West, about
+which no books have been written by persons who were on the
+ground in person, and saw the happenings of the time with their
+own eyes. I allude to the rise, growth and culmination of the
+silver-mining fever in Nevada&mdash;a curious episode, in some
+respects; the only one, of its peculiar kind, that has occurred
+in the land; and the only one, indeed, that is likely to occur in
+it.</p>
+
+<p>Yes, take it all around, there is quite a good deal of
+information in the book. I regret this very much; but really it
+could not be helped: information appears to stew out of me
+naturally, like the precious ottar of roses out of the otter.
+Sometimes it has seemed to me that I would give worlds if I could
+retain my facts; but it cannot be. The more I calk up the
+sources, and the tighter I get, the more I leak wisdom.
+Therefore, I can only claim indulgence at the hands of the
+reader, not justification.</p>
+
+<p>THE AUTHOR.</p>
+ <br><br><br><br>
+<center><h2>CONTENTS.</h2></center>
+
+<blockquote><blockquote>
+
+
+<p><a href="#ch51">CHAPTER LI.</a> The Weekly Occidental&mdash;A Ready Editor&mdash;A Novel&mdash;A
+Concentration of Talent&mdash;The Heroes and the Heroines&mdash;The
+Dissolute Author Engaged&mdash;Extraordinary Havoc With the Novel&mdash;A
+Highly Romantic Chapter&mdash;The Lovers Separated&mdash;Jonah Out-done&mdash;A
+Lost Poem&mdash;The Aged Pilot Man&mdash;Storm On the Erie Canal&mdash;Dollinger
+the Pilot Man&mdash;Terrific Gale&mdash;Danger Increases&mdash;A Crisis
+Arrived&mdash;Saved as if by a Miracle</p>
+
+<p><a href="#ch52">CHAPTER LII.</a> Freights to California&mdash;Silver Bricks&mdash;Under
+Ground Mines&mdash;Timber Supports&mdash;A Visit to the Mines&mdash;The Caved
+Mines&mdash;Total of Shipments in 1863</p>
+
+<p><a href="#ch53">CHAPTER LIII.</a> Jim Blaine and his Grandfather's Ram&mdash;Filkin's
+Mistake&mdash;Old Miss Wagner and her Glass Eye&mdash;Jacobs, the Coffin
+Dealer&mdash;Waiting for a Customer&mdash;His Bargain With Old
+Robbins&mdash;Robbins Sues for Damage and Collects&mdash;A New Use for
+Missionaries&mdash;The Effect&mdash;His Uncle Lem. and the Use Providence
+Made of Him&mdash;Sad Fate of Wheeler&mdash;Devotion of His Wife&mdash;A Model
+Monument&mdash;What About the Ram?</p>
+
+<p><a href="#ch54">CHAPTER LIV.</a> Chinese in Virginia City&mdash;Washing Bills&mdash;Habit of
+Imitation&mdash;Chinese Immigration&mdash;A Visit to Chinatown&mdash;Messrs. Ah
+Sing, Hong Wo, See Yup, &amp;c</p>
+
+<p><a href="#ch55">CHAPTER LV.</a> Tired of Virginia City&mdash;An Old Schoolmate&mdash;A Two
+Years' Loan&mdash;Acting as an Editor&mdash;Almost Receive an Offer&mdash;An
+Accident&mdash;Three Drunken Anecdotes&mdash;Last Look at Mt. Davidson&mdash;A
+Beautiful Incident</p>
+
+<p><a href="#ch56">CHAPTER LVI.</a> Off for San Francisco&mdash;Western and Eastern
+Landscapes&mdash;The Hottest place on Earth&mdash;Summer and Winter</p>
+
+<p><a href="#ch57">CHAPTER LVII.</a> California&mdash;Novelty of Seeing a Woman&mdash;"Well if
+it ain't a Child!"&mdash;One Hundred and Fifty Dollars for a
+Kiss&mdash;Waiting for a turn</p>
+
+<p><a href="#ch58">CHAPTER LVIII.</a> Life in San Francisco&mdash;Worthless Stocks&mdash;My
+First Earthquake&mdash;Reportorial Instincts&mdash;Effects of the
+Shocks&mdash;Incidents and Curiosities&mdash;Sabbath Breakers&mdash;The Lodger
+and the Chambermaid&mdash;A Sensible Fashion to Follow&mdash;Effects of
+the Earthquake on the Ministers</p>
+
+<p><a href="#ch59">CHAPTER LIX.</a> Poor Again&mdash;Slinking as a Business&mdash;A Model
+Collector&mdash;Misery loves Company&mdash;Comparing Notes for Comfort&mdash;A
+Streak of Luck&mdash;Finding a Dime&mdash;Wealthy by Comparison&mdash;Two
+Sumptuous Dinners</p>
+
+<p><a href="#ch60">CHAPTER LX.</a> An Old Friend&mdash;An Educated Miner&mdash;Pocket
+Mining&mdash;Freaks of Fortune</p>
+
+</blockquote></blockquote>
+
+
+<br><br><br><br>
+<center><h2>LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS</h2></center>
+
+<center>
+<table summary="">
+<tr><td>
+
+
+
+186. <a href="#361">THE HEROES AND HEROINES OF THE STORY</a><br>
+187. <a href="#362">DISSOLUTE AUTHOR</a><br>
+188. <a href="#365">THERE SAT THE LAWYER</a><br>
+189. <a href="#367">JONAH OUTDONE</a><br>
+190. <a href="#370">DOLLINGER</a><br>
+191. <a href="#371">LOW BRIDGE</a><br>
+192. <a href="#372">SHORTENING SAIL</a><br>
+193. <a href="#374">LIGHTENING SHIP</a><br>
+194. <a href="#375">THE MARVELLOUS RESCUE</a><br>
+195. <a href="#377">SILVER BRICKS</a><br>
+196. <a href="#379">TIMBER SUPPORTS</a><br>
+197. <a href="#380">FROM GALLERY TO GALLERY</a><br>
+198. <a href="#384">JIM BLAINE</a><br>
+199. <a href="#385">HURRAH FOR NIXON</a><br>
+200. <a href="#386">MISS WAGNER</a><br>
+201. <a href="#387">WAITING FOR A CUSTOMER</a><br>
+202. <a href="#388">WAS TO BE THERE</a><br>
+209. <a href="#389">THE MONUMENT</a><br>
+205. <a href="#390">WHERE IS THE RAM-TAIL-PIECE</a><br>
+205. <a href="#392">CHINESE WASH BILL</a><br>
+206. <a href="#393">IMITATION</a><br>
+207. <a href="#396">CHINESE LOTTERY</a><br>
+208. <a href="#397">CHINESE MERCHANT AT HOME</a><br>
+209. <a href="#399">AN OLD FRIEND</a><br>
+210. <a href="#403">FAREWELL AND ACCIDENT</a><br>
+211. <a href="#404">"GIMME A CIGAR"</a><br>
+212. <a href="#406">THE HERALD OF GLAD NEWS</a><br>
+213. <a href="#407">FLAG-TAIL-PIECE</a><br>
+214. <a href="#409">A NEW ENGLAND SCENE</a><br>
+215. <a href="#410">A VARIABLE CLIMATE</a><br>
+216. <a href="#413">SACRAMENTO AND THREE NODES AWAY</a><br>
+217. <a href="#416">"FETCH HER OUT ...</a><br>
+218. <a href="#417">"WELL IF IT AINT A CHILD ...</a><br>
+219. <a href="#418">A GENUINE LIVE WOMAN</a><br>
+220. <a href="#420">THE GRACE OF A KANGAROO</a><br>
+221. <a href="#421">DREAMS DISSIPATED</a><br>
+222. <a href="#422">THE "ONE HORSE SHAY" OUTDONE</a><br>
+223. <a href="#423a">HARD ON THE INNOCENTS</a><br>
+224. <a href="#423b">DRY BONES SHAKEN</a><br>
+225. <a href="#424">"OH! WHAT, SHALL I DO!...</a><br>
+226. <a href="#425">"GET OUT YOUR TOWEL MY DEAR"</a><br>
+227. <a href="#426">"WE WILL OMIT THE BENEDICTION...</a><br>
+228. <a href="#429">SLINKING</a><br>
+229. <a href="#431">A PRIZE</a><br>
+230. <a href="#432">A LOOK IN AT THE WINDOW</a><br>
+231. <a href="#433">"DO IT STRANGER"</a><br>
+232. <a href="#436">THE OLD COLLEGIATE</a><br>
+233. <a href="#437">STRIKING A POCKET</a><br>
+
+</td></tr>
+</table>
+</center>
+
+
+
+<br><br>
+
+<br><br>
+<a name="ch51"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<h2>CHAPTER LI.</h2>
+</center>
+<br>
+
+
+
+<p>Vice flourished luxuriantly during the hey-day of our "flush
+times." The saloons were overburdened with custom; so were the
+police courts, the gambling dens, the brothels and the
+jails&mdash;unfailing signs of high prosperity in a mining region&mdash;in
+any region for that matter. Is it not so? A crowded police court
+docket is the surest of all signs that trade is brisk and money
+plenty. Still, there is one other sign; it comes last, but when
+it does come it establishes beyond cavil that the "flush times"
+are at the flood. This is the birth of the "literary" paper. The
+Weekly Occidental, "devoted to literature," made its appearance
+in Virginia. All the literary people were engaged to write for
+it. Mr. F. was to edit it. He was a felicitous skirmisher with a
+pen, and a man who could say happy things in a crisp, neat way.
+Once, while editor of the Union, he had disposed of a labored,
+incoherent, two-column attack made upon him by a contemporary,
+with a single line, which, at first glance, seemed to contain a
+solemn and tremendous compliment&mdash;viz.: "THE LOGIC OF OUR
+ADVERSARY RESEMBLES THE PEACE OF GOD,"&mdash;and left it to the
+reader's memory and after-thought to invest the remark with
+another and "more different" meaning by supplying for himself and
+at his own leisure the rest of the Scripture&mdash;"in that it
+passeth understanding." He once said of a little, half-starved,
+wayside community that had no subsistence except what they could
+get by preying upon chance passengers who stopped over with them
+a day when traveling by the overland stage, that in their Church
+service they had altered the Lord's Prayer to read: "Give us this
+day our daily stranger!"</p>
+
+<p>We expected great things of the Occidental. Of course it could
+not get along without an original novel, and so we made
+arrangements to hurl into the work the full strength of the
+company. Mrs. F. was an able romancist of the ineffable school&mdash;I
+know no other name to apply to a school whose heroes are all
+dainty and all perfect. She wrote the opening chapter, and
+introduced a lovely blonde simpleton who talked nothing but
+pearls and poetry and who was virtuous to the verge of
+eccentricity. She also introduced a young French Duke of
+aggravated refinement, in love with the blonde. Mr. F. followed
+next week, with a brilliant lawyer who set about getting the
+Duke's estates into trouble, and a sparkling young lady of high
+society who fell to fascinating the Duke and impairing the
+appetite of the blonde. Mr. D., a dark and bloody editor of one
+of the dailies, followed Mr. F., the third week, introducing a
+mysterious Roscicrucian who transmuted metals, held consultations
+with the devil in a cave at dead of night, and cast the horoscope
+of the several heroes and heroines in such a way as to provide
+plenty of trouble for their future careers and breed a solemn and
+awful public interest in the novel. He also introduced a cloaked
+and masked melodramatic miscreant, put him on a salary and set
+him on the midnight track of the Duke with a poisoned dagger. He
+also created an Irish coachman with a rich brogue and placed him
+in the service of the society-young-lady with an ulterior mission
+to carry billet-doux to the Duke.</p>
+
+<a name="361"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="361.jpg (79K)" src="images/361.jpg" height="421" width="605">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>About this time there arrived in Virginia a dissolute stranger
+with a literary turn of mind&mdash;rather seedy he was, but very quiet
+and unassuming; almost diffident, indeed. He was so gentle, and
+his manners were so pleasing and kindly, whether he was sober or
+intoxicated, that he made friends of all who came in contact with
+him. He applied for literary work, offered conclusive evidence
+that he wielded an easy and practiced pen, and so Mr. F. engaged
+him at once to help write the novel. His chapter was to follow
+Mr. D.'s, and mine was to come next. Now what does this fellow do
+but go off and get drunk and then proceed to his quarters and set
+to work with his imagination in a state of chaos, and that chaos
+in a condition of extravagant activity. The result may be
+guessed. He scanned the chapters of his predecessors, found
+plenty of heroes and heroines already created, and was satisfied
+with them; he decided to introduce no more; with all the
+confidence that whisky inspires and all the easy complacency it
+gives to its servant, he then launched himself lovingly into his
+work: he married the coachman to the society-young-lady for the
+sake of the scandal; married the Duke to the blonde's stepmother,
+for the sake of the sensation; stopped the desperado's salary;
+created a misunderstanding between the devil and the
+Roscicrucian; threw the Duke's property into the wicked lawyer's
+hands; made the lawyer's upbraiding conscience drive him to
+drink, thence to delirium tremens, thence to suicide; broke the
+coachman's neck; let his widow succumb to contumely, neglect,
+poverty and consumption; caused the blonde to drown herself,
+leaving her clothes on the bank with the customary note pinned to
+them forgiving the Duke and hoping he would be happy; revealed to
+the Duke, by means of the usual strawberry mark on left arm, that
+he had married his own long-lost mother and destroyed his
+long-lost sister; instituted the proper and necessary suicide of
+the Duke and the Duchess in order to compass poetical justice;
+opened the earth and let the Roscicrucian through, accompanied
+with the accustomed smoke and thunder and smell of brimstone, and
+finished with the promise that in the next chapter, after holding
+a general inquest, he would take up the surviving character of
+the novel and tell what became of the devil!</p>
+
+<a name="362"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="362.jpg (39K)" src="images/362.jpg" height="515" width="315">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>It read with
+singular smoothness, and with a "dead" earnestness that was funny
+enough to suffocate a body. But there was war when it came in.
+The other novelists were furious. The mild stranger, not yet more
+than half sober, stood there, under a scathing fire of
+vituperation, meek and bewildered, looking from one to another of
+his assailants, and wondering what he could have done to invoke
+such a storm. When a lull came at last, he said his say gently
+and appealingly&mdash;said he did not rightly remember what he had
+written, but was sure he had tried to do the best he could, and
+knew his object had been to make the novel not only pleasant and
+plausible but instructive and&mdash;&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>The bombardment began again. The novelists assailed his
+ill-chosen adjectives and demolished them with a storm of
+denunciation and ridicule. And so the siege went on. Every time
+the stranger tried to appease the enemy he only made matters
+worse. Finally he offered to rewrite the chapter. This arrested
+hostilities. The indignation gradually quieted down, peace
+reigned again and the sufferer retired in safety and got him to
+his own citadel.</p>
+
+<p>But on the way thither the evil angel tempted him and he got
+drunk again. And again his imagination went mad. He led the
+heroes and heroines a wilder dance than ever; and yet all through
+it ran that same convincing air of honesty and earnestness that
+had marked his first work. He got the characters into the most
+extraordinary situations, put them through the most surprising
+performances, and made them talk the strangest talk! But the
+chapter cannot be described. It was symmetrically crazy; it was
+artistically absurd; and it had explanatory footnotes that were
+fully as curious as the text. I remember one of the "situations,"
+and will offer it as an example of the whole. He altered the
+character of the brilliant lawyer, and made him a great-hearted,
+splendid fellow; gave him fame and riches, and set his age at
+thirty-three years. Then he made the blonde discover, through the
+help of the Roscicrucian and the melodramatic miscreant, that
+while the Duke loved her money ardently and wanted it, he
+secretly felt a sort of leaning toward the society-young-lady.
+Stung to the quick, she tore her affections from him and bestowed
+them with tenfold power upon the lawyer, who responded with
+consuming zeal. But the parents would none of it. What they
+wanted in the family was a Duke; and a Duke they were determined
+to have; though they confessed that next to the Duke the lawyer
+had their preference. Necessarily the blonde now went into a
+decline. The parents were alarmed. They pleaded with her to marry
+the Duke, but she steadfastly refused, and pined on. Then they
+laid a plan. They told her to wait a year and a day, and if at
+the end of that time she still felt that she could not marry the
+Duke, she might marry the lawyer with their full consent. The
+result was as they had foreseen: gladness came again, and the
+flush of returning health. Then the parents took the next step in
+their scheme. They had the family physician recommend a long sea
+voyage and much land travel for the thorough restoration of the
+blonde's strength; and they invited the Duke to be of the party.
+They judged that the Duke's constant presence and the lawyer's
+protracted absence would do the rest&mdash;for they did not invite the
+lawyer.</p>
+
+<p>So they set sail in a steamer for America&mdash;and the third day
+out, when their sea-sickness called truce and permitted them to
+take their first meal at the public table, behold there sat the
+lawyer! The Duke and party made the best of an awkward situation;
+the voyage progressed, and the vessel neared America.</p>
+
+<a name="365"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="365.jpg (74K)" src="images/365.jpg" height="421" width="597">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>But, by and by, two hundred miles off New Bedford, the ship
+took fire; she burned to the water's edge; of all her crew and
+passengers, only thirty were saved. They floated about the sea
+half an afternoon and all night long. Among them were our
+friends. The lawyer, by superhuman exertions, had saved the
+blonde and her parents, swimming back and forth two hundred yards
+and bringing one each time&mdash;(the girl first). The Duke had saved
+himself. In the morning two whale ships arrived on the scene and
+sent their boats. The weather was stormy and the embarkation was
+attended with much confusion and excitement. The lawyer did his
+duty like a man; helped his exhausted and insensible blonde, her
+parents and some others into a boat (the Duke helped himself in);
+then a child fell overboard at the other end of the raft and the
+lawyer rushed thither and helped half a dozen people fish it out,
+under the stimulus of its mother's screams. Then he ran back&mdash;a
+few seconds too late&mdash;the blonde's boat was under way. So he had
+to take the other boat, and go to the other ship. The storm
+increased and drove the vessels out of sight of each other&mdash;drove
+them whither it would.</p>
+
+<a name="366"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="366.jpg (83K)" src="images/366.jpg" height="570" width="545">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>When it calmed, at the end of three days, the blonde's ship
+was seven hundred miles north of Boston and the other about seven
+hundred south of that port. The blonde's captain was bound on a
+whaling cruise in the North Atlantic and could not go back such a
+distance or make a port without orders; such being nautical law.
+The lawyer's captain was to cruise in the North Pacific, and he
+could not go back or make a port without orders. All the lawyer's
+money and baggage were in the blonde's boat and went to the
+blonde's ship&mdash;so his captain made him work his passage as a
+common sailor. When both ships had been cruising nearly a year,
+the one was off the coast of Greenland and the other in Behring's
+Strait. The blonde had long ago been well-nigh persuaded that her
+lawyer had been washed overboard and lost just before the whale
+ships reached the raft, and now, under the pleadings of her
+parents and the Duke she was at last beginning to nerve herself
+for the doom of the covenant, and prepare for the hated
+marriage.</p>
+
+<p>But she would not yield a day before the date set. The weeks
+dragged on, the time narrowed, orders were given to deck the ship
+for the wedding&mdash;a wedding at sea among icebergs and walruses.
+Five days more and all would be over. So the blonde reflected,
+with a sigh and a tear. Oh where was her true love&mdash;and why, why
+did he not come and save her? At that moment he was lifting his
+harpoon to strike a whale in Behring's Strait, five thousand
+miles away, by the way of the Arctic Ocean, or twenty thousand by
+the way of the Horn&mdash;that was the reason. He struck, but not with
+perfect aim&mdash;his foot slipped and he fell in the whale's mouth
+and went down his throat. He was insensible five days. Then he
+came to himself and heard voices; daylight was streaming through
+a hole cut in the whale's roof. He climbed out and astonished the
+sailors who were hoisting blubber up a ship's side. He recognized
+the vessel, flew aboard, surprised the wedding party at the altar
+and exclaimed:</p>
+
+<p>"Stop the proceedings&mdash;I'm here! Come to my arms, my own!"</p>
+
+<a name="367"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="367.jpg (88K)" src="images/367.jpg" height="507" width="608">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>There were foot-notes to this extravagant piece of literature
+wherein the author endeavored to show that the whole thing was
+within the possibilities; he said he got the incident of the
+whale traveling from Behring's Strait to the coast of Greenland,
+five thousand miles in five days, through the Arctic Ocean, from
+Charles Reade's "Love Me Little Love Me Long," and considered
+that that established the fact that the thing could be done; and
+he instanced Jonah's adventure as proof that a man could live in
+a whale's belly, and added that if a preacher could stand it
+three days a lawyer could surely stand it five!</p>
+
+<p>There was a fiercer storm than ever in the editorial sanctum
+now, and the stranger was peremptorily discharged, and his
+manuscript flung at his head. But he had already delayed things
+so much that there was not time for some one else to rewrite the
+chapter, and so the paper came out without any novel in it. It
+was but a feeble, struggling, stupid journal, and the absence of
+the novel probably shook public confidence; at any rate, before
+the first side of the next issue went to press, the Weekly
+Occidental died as peacefully as an infant.</p>
+
+<p>An effort was made to resurrect it, with the proposed
+advantage of a telling new title, and Mr. F. said that The Phenix
+would be just the name for it, because it would give the idea of
+a resurrection from its dead ashes in a new and undreamed of
+condition of splendor; but some low- priced smarty on one of the
+dailies suggested that we call it the Lazarus; and inasmuch as
+the people were not profound in Scriptural matters but thought
+the resurrected Lazarus and the dilapidated mendicant that begged
+in the rich man's gateway were one and the same person, the name
+became the laughing stock of the town, and killed the paper for
+good and all.</p>
+
+<p>I was sorry enough, for I was very proud of being connected
+with a literary paper&mdash;prouder than I have ever been of anything
+since, perhaps. I had written some rhymes for it&mdash;poetry I
+considered it&mdash;and it was a great grief to me that the production
+was on the "first side" of the issue that was not completed, and
+hence did not see the light. But time brings its revenges&mdash;I can
+put it in here; it will answer in place of a tear dropped to the
+memory of the lost Occidental. The idea (not the chief idea, but
+the vehicle that bears it) was probably suggested by the old song
+called "The Raging Canal," but I cannot remember now. I do
+remember, though, that at that time I thought my doggerel was one
+of the ablest poems of the age:</p>
+
+
+
+<h3>THE AGED PILOT MAN.</h3>
+
+<center>
+<table summary="">
+<tr><td>
+
+
+<p>On the Erie Canal, it was,<br>
+All on a summer's day,<br>
+I sailed forth with my parents<br>
+Far away to Albany.</p>
+
+<p>From out the clouds at noon that day<br>
+There came a dreadful storm,<br>
+That piled the billows high about,<br>
+And filled us with alarm.</p>
+
+<p>A man came rushing from a house,<br>
+Saying, "Snub up your boat I pray,<br>
+[The customary canal technicality for "tie up."]<br>
+Snub up your boat, snub up, alas,<br>
+Snub up while yet you may."</p>
+
+<p>Our captain cast one glance astern,<br>
+Then forward glanced he,<br>
+And said, "My wife and little ones<br>
+I never more shall see."</p>
+
+<p>Said Dollinger the pilot man,<br>
+In noble words, but few,--<br>
+"Fear not, but lean on Dollinger,<br>
+And he will fetch you through."</p>
+
+
+</td></tr>
+</table>
+</center>
+
+
+
+<a name="370"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="370.jpg (53K)" src="images/370.jpg" height="504" width="336">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<center>
+<table summary="">
+<tr><td>
+
+
+<p>The boat drove on, the frightened mules<br>
+Tore through the rain and wind,<br>
+And bravely still, in danger's post,<br>
+The whip-boy strode behind.</p>
+
+<p>"Come 'board, come 'board," the captain cried,<br>
+"Nor tempt so wild a storm;"<br>
+But still the raging mules advanced,<br>
+And still the boy strode on.</p>
+
+<p>Then said the captain to us all,<br>
+"Alas, 'tis plain to me,<br>
+The greater danger is not there,<br>
+But here upon the sea.</p>
+
+<p>"So let us strive, while life remains,<br>
+To save all souls on board,<br>
+And then if die at last we must,<br>
+Let . &nbsp;. &nbsp;. &nbsp;. &nbsp;I cannot speak the word!"</p>
+
+<p>Said Dollinger the pilot man,<br>
+Tow'ring above the crew,<br>
+"Fear not, but trust in Dollinger,<br>
+And he will fetch you through."</p>
+
+
+</td></tr>
+</table>
+</center>
+
+<a name="371"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="371.jpg (102K)" src="images/371.jpg" height="538" width="581">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<center>
+<table summary="">
+<tr><td>
+
+
+<p>"Low bridge! &nbsp;low bridge!" all heads went down,<br>
+The laboring bark sped on;<br>
+A mill we passed, we passed church,<br>
+Hamlets, and fields of corn;<br>
+And all the world came out to see,<br>
+And chased along the shore<br>
+Crying, "Alas, alas, the sheeted rain,<br>
+The wind, the tempest's roar!<br>
+Alas, the gallant ship and crew,<br>
+Can nothing help them more?"</p>
+
+<p>And from our deck sad eyes looked out<br>
+Across the stormy scene:<br>
+The tossing wake of billows aft,<br>
+The bending forests green,<br>
+The chickens sheltered under carts<br>
+In lee of barn the cows,<br>
+The skurrying swine with straw in mouth,<br>
+The wild spray from our bows!</p>
+
+<p>"She balances!<br>
+She wavers!<br>
+Now let her go about!<br>
+If she misses stays and broaches to,<br>
+We're all"--then with a shout,<br>
+"Huray! &nbsp;huray!<br>
+Avast! &nbsp;belay!<br>
+Take in more sail!<br>
+Lord, what a gale!<br>
+Ho, boy, haul taut on the hind mule's tail!"<br>
+
+
+</td></tr>
+</table>
+</center>
+
+<a name="372"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="372.jpg (105K)" src="images/372.jpg" height="531" width="597">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<center>
+<table summary="">
+<tr><td>
+
+
+<p>"Ho! &nbsp;lighten ship! &nbsp;ho! &nbsp;man the pump!<br>
+Ho, hostler, heave the lead!"</p>
+
+<p>"A quarter-three!--'tis shoaling fast!<br>
+Three feet large!--t-h-r-e-e feet!--<br>
+Three feet scant!" I cried in fright<br>
+"Oh, is there no retreat?"</p>
+
+<p>Said Dollinger, the pilot man,<br>
+As on the vessel flew,<br>
+"Fear not, but trust in Dollinger,<br>
+And he will fetch you through."</p>
+
+<p>A panic struck the bravest hearts,<br>
+The boldest cheek turned pale;<br>
+For plain to all, this shoaling said<br>
+A leak had burst the ditch's bed!<br>
+And, straight as bolt from crossbow sped,<br>
+Our ship swept on, with shoaling lead,<br>
+Before the fearful gale!</p>
+
+<p>"Sever the tow-line! &nbsp;Cripple the mules!"<br>
+Too late! &nbsp;There comes a shock!<br>
+Another length, and the fated craft<br>
+Would have swum in the saving lock!</p>
+
+<p>Then gathered together the shipwrecked crew<br>
+And took one last embrace,<br>
+While sorrowful tears from despairing eyes<br>
+Ran down each hopeless face;<br>
+And some did think of their little ones<br>
+Whom they never more might see,<br>
+And others of waiting wives at home,<br>
+And mothers that grieved would be.</p>
+
+<p>But of all the children of misery there<br>
+On that poor sinking frame,<br>
+But one spake words of hope and faith,<br>
+And I worshipped as they came:<br>
+Said Dollinger the pilot man,--<br>
+(O brave heart, strong and true!)--<br>
+"Fear not, but trust in Dollinger,<br>
+For he will fetch you through."</p>
+
+<p>Lo! &nbsp;scarce the words have passed his lips<br>
+The dauntless prophet say'th,<br>
+When every soul about him seeth<br>
+A wonder crown his faith!</p>
+
+<p>"And count ye all, both great and small,<br>
+As numbered with the dead:<br>
+For mariner for forty year,<br>
+On Erie, boy and man,<br>
+I never yet saw such a storm,<br>
+Or one't with it began!"</p>
+
+<p>So overboard a keg of nails<br>
+And anvils three we threw,<br>
+Likewise four bales of gunny-sacks,<br>
+Two hundred pounds of glue,<br>
+Two sacks of corn, four ditto wheat,<br>
+A box of books, a cow,<br>
+A violin, Lord Byron's works,<br>
+A rip-saw and a sow.</p>
+
+
+</td></tr>
+</table>
+</center>
+
+<a name="374"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="374.jpg (67K)" src="images/374.jpg" height="488" width="486">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<center>
+<table summary="">
+<tr><td>
+
+
+<p>A curve! &nbsp;a curve! &nbsp;the dangers grow!<br>
+"Labbord!--stabbord!--s-t-e-a-d-y!--so!--<br>
+Hard-a-port, Dol!--hellum-a-lee!<br>
+Haw the head mule!--the aft one gee!<br>
+Luff!--bring her to the wind!"</p>
+
+<p>For straight a farmer brought a plank,--<br>
+(Mysteriously inspired)--<br>
+And laying it unto the ship,<br>
+In silent awe retired.</p>
+
+<p>Then every sufferer stood amazed<br>
+That pilot man before;<br>
+A moment stood. &nbsp;Then wondering turned,<br>
+And speechless walked ashore.</p>
+
+
+</td></tr>
+</table>
+</center>
+
+
+
+
+<a name="375"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="375.jpg (82K)" src="images/375.jpg" height="477" width="565">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+
+
+<br><br>
+<a name="ch52"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<h2>CHAPTER LII.</h2>
+</center>
+<br>
+
+
+
+<p>Since I desire, in this chapter, to say an instructive word or
+two about the silver mines, the reader may take this fair warning
+and skip, if he chooses. The year 1863 was perhaps the very top
+blossom and culmination of the "flush times." Virginia swarmed
+with men and vehicles to that degree that the place looked like a
+very hive&mdash;that is when one's vision could pierce through the
+thick fog of alkali dust that was generally blowing in summer. I
+will say, concerning this dust, that if you drove ten miles
+through it, you and your horses would be coated with it a
+sixteenth of an inch thick and present an outside appearance that
+was a uniform pale yellow color, and your buggy would have three
+inches of dust in it, thrown there by the wheels. The delicate
+scales used by the assayers were inclosed in glass cases intended
+to be air-tight, and yet some of this dust was so impalpable and
+so invisibly fine that it would get in, somehow, and impair the
+accuracy of those scales.</p>
+
+<p>Speculation ran riot, and yet there was a world of substantial
+business going on, too. All freights were brought over the
+mountains from California (150 miles) by pack-train partly, and
+partly in huge wagons drawn by such long mule teams that each
+team amounted to a procession, and it did seem, sometimes, that
+the grand combined procession of animals stretched unbroken from
+Virginia to California. Its long route was traceable clear across
+the deserts of the Territory by the writhing serpent of dust it
+lifted up. By these wagons, freights over that hundred and fifty
+miles were $200 a ton for small lots (same price for all express
+matter brought by stage), and $100 a ton for full loads. One
+Virginia firm received one hundred tons of freight a month, and
+paid $10,000 a month freightage. In the winter the freights were
+much higher. All the bullion was shipped in bars by stage to San
+Francisco (a bar was usually about twice the size of a pig of
+lead and contained from $1,500 to $3,000 according to the amount
+of gold mixed with the silver), and the freight on it (when the
+shipment was large) was one and a quarter per cent. of its
+intrinsic value.</p>
+
+<a name="377"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="377.jpg (16K)" src="images/377.jpg" height="231" width="364">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>So, the freight on these bars probably averaged something more
+than $25 each. Small shippers paid two per cent. There were three
+stages a day, each way, and I have seen the out-going stages
+carry away a third of a ton of bullion each, and more than once I
+saw them divide a two-ton lot and take it off. However, these
+were extraordinary events. [Mr. Valentine, Wells Fargo's agent,
+has handled all the bullion shipped through the Virginia office
+for many a month. To his memory&mdash;which is excellent&mdash;we are
+indebted for the following exhibit of the company's business in
+the Virginia office since the first of January, 1862: From
+January 1st to April 1st, about $270,000 worth of bullion passed
+through that office, during the next quarter, $570,000; next
+quarter, $800,000; next quarter, $956,000; next quarter,
+$1,275,000; and for the quarter ending on the 30th of last June,
+about $1,600,000. Thus in a year and a half, the Virginia office
+only shipped $5,330,000 in bullion. During the year 1862 they
+shipped $2,615,000, so we perceive the average shipments have
+more than doubled in the last six months. This gives us room to
+promise for the Virginia office $500,000 a month for the year
+1863 (though perhaps, judging by the steady increase in the
+business, we are under estimating, somewhat). This gives us
+$6,000,000 for the year. Gold Hill and Silver City together can
+beat us&mdash;we will give them $10,000,000. To Dayton, Empire City,
+Ophir and Carson City, we will allow an aggregate of $8,000,000,
+which is not over the mark, perhaps, and may possibly be a little
+under it. To Esmeralda we give $4,000,000. To Reese River and
+Humboldt $2,000,000, which is liberal now, but may not be before
+the year is out. So we prognosticate that the yield of bullion
+this year will be about $30,000,000. Placing the number of mills
+in the Territory at one hundred, this gives to each the labor of
+producing $300,000 in bullion during the twelve months. Allowing
+them to run three hundred days in the year (which none of them
+more than do), this makes their work average $1,000 a day. Say
+the mills average twenty tons of rock a day and this rock worth
+$50 as a general thing, and you have the actual work of our one
+hundred mills figured down "to a spot"&mdash;$1,000 a day each, and
+$30,000,000 a year in the aggregate.&mdash;Enterprise. [A considerable
+over estimate&mdash;M. T.]]</p>
+
+<p>Two tons of silver bullion would be in the neighborhood of
+forty bars, and the freight on it over $1,000. Each coach always
+carried a deal of ordinary express matter beside, and also from
+fifteen to twenty passengers at from $25 to $30 a head. With six
+stages going all the time, Wells, Fargo and Co.'s Virginia City
+business was important and lucrative.</p>
+
+<p>All along under the centre of Virginia and Gold Hill, for a
+couple of miles, ran the great Comstock silver lode&mdash;a vein of
+ore from fifty to eighty feet thick between its solid walls of
+rock&mdash;a vein as wide as some of New York's streets. I will remind
+the reader that in Pennsylvania a coal vein only eight feet wide
+is considered ample.</p>
+
+<p>Virginia was a busy city of streets and houses above ground.
+Under it was another busy city, down in the bowels of the earth,
+where a great population of men thronged in and out among an
+intricate maze of tunnels and drifts, flitting hither and thither
+under a winking sparkle of lights, and over their heads towered a
+vast web of interlocking timbers that held the walls of the
+gutted Comstock apart. These timbers were as large as a man's
+body, and the framework stretched upward so far that no eye could
+pierce to its top through the closing gloom. It was like peering
+up through the clean-picked ribs and bones of some colossal
+skeleton. Imagine such a framework two miles long, sixty feet
+wide, and higher than any church spire in America. Imagine this
+stately lattice- work stretching down Broadway, from the St.
+Nicholas to Wall street, and a Fourth of July procession, reduced
+to pigmies, parading on top of it and flaunting their flags, high
+above the pinnacle of Trinity steeple. One can imagine that, but
+he cannot well imagine what that forest of timbers cost, from the
+time they were felled in the pineries beyond Washoe Lake, hauled
+up and around Mount Davidson at atrocious rates of freightage,
+then squared, let down into the deep maw of the mine and built up
+there. Twenty ample fortunes would not timber one of the greatest
+of those silver mines. The Spanish proverb says it requires a
+gold mine to "run" a silver one, and it is true. A beggar with a
+silver mine is a pitiable pauper indeed if he cannot sell.</p>
+
+<a name="379"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="379.jpg (47K)" src="images/379.jpg" height="479" width="330">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>I spoke of the underground Virginia as a city. The Gould and
+Curry is only one single mine under there, among a great many
+others; yet the Gould and Curry's streets of dismal drifts and
+tunnels were five miles in extent, altogether, and its population
+five hundred miners. Taken as a whole, the underground city had
+some thirty miles of streets and a population of five or six
+thousand. In this present day some of those populations are at
+work from twelve to sixteen hundred feet under Virginia and Gold
+Hill, and the signal-bells that tell them what the superintendent
+above ground desires them to do are struck by telegraph as we
+strike a fire alarm. Sometimes men fall down a shaft, there, a
+thousand feet deep. In such cases, the usual plan is to hold an
+inquest.</p>
+
+<a name="380"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="380.jpg (161K)" src="images/380.jpg" height="1020" width="608">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>If you wish to visit one of those mines, you may walk through
+a tunnel about half a mile long if you prefer it, or you may take
+the quicker plan of shooting like a dart down a shaft, on a small
+platform. It is like tumbling down through an empty steeple, feet
+first. When you reach the bottom, you take a candle and tramp
+through drifts and tunnels where throngs of men are digging and
+blasting; you watch them send up tubs full of great lumps of
+stone&mdash;silver ore; you select choice specimens from the mass, as
+souvenirs; you admire the world of skeleton timbering; you
+reflect frequently that you are buried under a mountain, a
+thousand feet below daylight; being in the bottom of the mine you
+climb from "gallery" to "gallery," up endless ladders that stand
+straight up and down; when your legs fail you at last, you lie
+down in a small box-car in a cramped "incline" like a
+half-up-ended sewer and are dragged up to daylight feeling as if
+you are crawling through a coffin that has no end to it. Arrived
+at the top, you find a busy crowd of men receiving the ascending
+cars and tubs and dumping the ore from an elevation into long
+rows of bins capable of holding half a dozen tons each; under the
+bins are rows of wagons loading from chutes and trap-doors in the
+bins, and down the long street is a procession of these wagons
+wending toward the silver mills with their rich freight. It is
+all "done," now, and there you are. You need never go down again,
+for you have seen it all. If you have forgotten the process of
+reducing the ore in the mill and making the silver bars, you can
+go back and find it again in my Esmeralda chapters if so
+disposed.</p>
+
+<p>Of course these mines cave in, in places, occasionally, and
+then it is worth one's while to take the risk of descending into
+them and observing the crushing power exerted by the pressing
+weight of a settling mountain. I published such an experience in
+the Enterprise, once, and from it I will take an extract:</p>
+
+<blockquote><blockquote>
+<p>AN HOUR IN THE CAVED MINES.&mdash;We journeyed down into the Ophir
+mine, yesterday, to see the earthquake. We could not go down the
+deep incline, because it still has a propensity to cave in
+places. Therefore we traveled through the long tunnel which
+enters the hill above the Ophir office, and then by means of a
+series of long ladders, climbed away down from the first to the
+fourth gallery. Traversing a drift, we came to the Spanish line,
+passed five sets of timbers still uninjured, and found the
+earthquake. Here was as complete a chaos as ever was seen&mdash;vast
+masses of earth and splintered and broken timbers piled
+confusedly together, with scarcely an aperture left large enough
+for a cat to creep through. Rubbish was still falling at
+intervals from above, and one timber which had braced others
+earlier in the day, was now crushed down out of its former
+position, showing that the caving and settling of the tremendous
+mass was still going on. We were in that portion of the Ophir
+known as the "north mines." Returning to the surface, we entered
+a tunnel leading into the Central, for the purpose of getting
+into the main Ophir. Descending a long incline in this tunnel, we
+traversed a drift or so, and then went down a deep shaft from
+whence we proceeded into the fifth gallery of the Ophir. From a
+side-drift we crawled through a small hole and got into the midst
+of the earthquake again&mdash;earth and broken timbers mingled
+together without regard to grace or symmetry. A large portion of
+the second, third and fourth galleries had caved in and gone to
+destruction&mdash;the two latter at seven o'clock on the previous
+evening.</p>
+
+<p>At the turn-table, near the northern extremity of the fifth
+gallery, two big piles of rubbish had forced their way through
+from the fifth gallery, and from the looks of the timbers, more
+was about to come. These beams are solid&mdash;eighteen inches square;
+first, a great beam is laid on the floor, then upright ones, five
+feet high, stand on it, supporting another horizontal beam, and
+so on, square above square, like the framework of a window. The
+superincumbent weight was sufficient to mash the ends of those
+great upright beams fairly into the solid wood of the horizontal
+ones three inches, compressing and bending the upright beam till
+it curved like a bow. Before the Spanish caved in, some of their
+twelve-inch horizontal timbers were compressed in this way until
+they were only five inches thick! Imagine the power it must take
+to squeeze a solid log together in that way. Here, also, was a
+range of timbers, for a distance of twenty feet, tilted six
+inches out of the perpendicular by the weight resting upon them
+from the caved galleries above. You could hear things cracking
+and giving way, and it was not pleasant to know that the world
+overhead was slowly and silently sinking down upon you. The men
+down in the mine do not mind it, however.</p>
+
+<p>Returning along the fifth gallery, we struck the safe part of
+the Ophir incline, and went down it to the sixth; but we found
+ten inches of water there, and had to come back. In repairing the
+damage done to the incline, the pump had to be stopped for two
+hours, and in the meantime the water gained about a foot.
+However, the pump was at work again, and the flood-water was
+decreasing. We climbed up to the fifth gallery again and sought a
+deep shaft, whereby we might descend to another part of the
+sixth, out of reach of the water, but suffered disappointment, as
+the men had gone to dinner, and there was no one to man the
+windlass. So, having seen the earthquake, we climbed out at the
+Union incline and tunnel, and adjourned, all dripping with candle
+grease and perspiration, to lunch at the Ophir office.</p>
+</blockquote></blockquote>
+
+<p>During the great flush year of 1863, Nevada [claims to have]
+produced $25,000,000 in bullion&mdash;almost, if not quite, a round
+million to each thousand inhabitants, which is very well,
+considering that she was without agriculture and manufactures.
+Silver mining was her sole productive industry.
+</p>
+
+
+<blockquote><blockquote>
+<p>[Since the above
+was in type, I learn from an official source that the above
+figure is too high, and that the yield for 1863 did not exceed
+$20,000,000.] However, the day for large figures is approaching;
+the Sutro Tunnel is to plow through the Comstock lode from end to
+end, at a depth of two thousand feet, and then mining will be
+easy and comparatively inexpensive; and the momentous matters of
+drainage, and hoisting and hauling of ore will cease to be
+burdensome. This vast work will absorb many years, and millions
+of dollars, in its completion; but it will early yield money, for
+that desirable epoch will begin as soon as it strikes the first
+end of the vein. The tunnel will be some eight miles long, and
+will develop astonishing riches. Cars will carry the ore through
+the tunnel and dump it in the mills and thus do away with the
+present costly system of double handling and transportation by
+mule teams. The water from the tunnel will furnish the motive
+power for the mills. Mr. Sutro, the originator of this prodigious
+enterprise, is one of the few men in the world who is gifted with
+the pluck and perseverance necessary to follow up and hound such
+an undertaking to its completion. He has converted several
+obstinate Congresses to a deserved friendliness toward his
+important work, and has gone up and down and to and fro in Europe
+until he has enlisted a great moneyed interest in it there.</p>
+</blockquote></blockquote>
+
+
+<br><br>
+<a name="ch53"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<h2>CHAPTER LIII.</h2>
+</center>
+<br>
+
+
+
+<p>Every now and then, in these days, the boys used to tell me I
+ought to get one Jim Blaine to tell me the stirring story of his
+grandfather's old ram&mdash;but they always added that I must not
+mention the matter unless Jim was drunk at the time&mdash;just
+comfortably and sociably drunk. They kept this up until my
+curiosity was on the rack to hear the story. I got to haunting
+Blaine; but it was of no use, the boys always found fault with
+his condition; he was often moderately but never satisfactorily
+drunk. I never watched a man's condition with such absorbing
+interest, such anxious solicitude; I never so pined to see a man
+uncompromisingly drunk before. At last, one evening I hurried to
+his cabin, for I learned that this time his situation was such
+that even the most fastidious could find no fault with it&mdash;he was
+tranquilly, serenely, symmetrically drunk&mdash;not a hiccup to mar
+his voice, not a cloud upon his brain thick enough to obscure his
+memory. As I entered, he was sitting upon an empty powder- keg,
+with a clay pipe in one hand and the other raised to command
+silence. His face was round, red, and very serious; his throat
+was bare and his hair tumbled; in general appearance and costume
+he was a stalwart miner of the period. On the pine table stood a
+candle, and its dim light revealed "the boys" sitting here and
+there on bunks, candle-boxes, powder-kegs, etc. They said:</p>
+
+<p>"Sh&mdash;! Don't speak&mdash;he's going to commence."</p>
+
+<a name="384"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="384.jpg (53K)" src="images/384.jpg" height="443" width="435">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<center>
+<h3>THE STORY OF THE OLD RAM.</h3>
+</center>
+<p>I found a seat at once, and Blaine said:</p>
+
+<p>'I don't reckon them times will ever come again. There never
+was a more bullier old ram than what he was. Grandfather fetched
+him from Illinois&mdash;got him of a man by the name of Yates&mdash;Bill
+Yates&mdash;maybe you might have heard of him; his father was a
+deacon&mdash;Baptist&mdash;and he was a rustler, too; a man had to get up
+ruther early to get the start of old Thankful Yates; it was him
+that put the Greens up to jining teams with my grandfather when
+he moved west.</p>
+
+<p>'Seth Green was prob'ly the pick of the flock; he married a
+Wilkerson&mdash;Sarah Wilkerson&mdash;good cretur, she was&mdash;one of the
+likeliest heifers that was ever raised in old Stoddard, everybody
+said that knowed her. She could heft a bar'l of flour as easy as
+I can flirt a flapjack. And spin? Don't mention it! Independent?
+Humph! When Sile Hawkins come a browsing around her, she let him
+know that for all his tin he couldn't trot in harness alongside
+of her. You see, Sile Hawkins was&mdash;no, it warn't Sile Hawkins,
+after all&mdash;it was a galoot by the name of Filkins&mdash;I disremember
+his first name; but he was a stump&mdash;come into pra'r meeting
+drunk, one night, hooraying for Nixon, becuz he thought it was a
+primary; and old deacon Ferguson up and scooted him through the
+window and he lit on old Miss Jefferson's head, poor old filly.
+</p>
+
+<a name="385"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="385.jpg (52K)" src="images/385.jpg" height="488" width="417">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>She was a good soul&mdash;had a glass eye and used to lend it to old
+Miss Wagner, that hadn't any, to receive company in; it warn't
+big enough, and when Miss Wagner warn't noticing, it would get
+twisted around in the socket, and look up, maybe, or out to one
+side, and every which way, while t' other one was looking as
+straight ahead as a spy-glass.</p>
+
+<p>'Grown people didn't mind it, but it most always made the
+children cry, it was so sort of scary. She tried packing it in
+raw cotton, but it wouldn't work, somehow&mdash;the cotton would get
+loose and stick out and look so kind of awful that the children
+couldn't stand it no way.
+</p>
+
+<a name="386"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="386.jpg (26K)" src="images/386.jpg" height="354" width="324">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>
+She was always dropping it out, and
+turning up her old dead-light on the company empty, and making
+them oncomfortable, becuz she never could tell when it hopped
+out, being blind on that side, you see. So somebody would have to
+hunch her and say, "Your game eye has fetched loose. Miss Wagner
+dear"&mdash;and then all of them would have to sit and wait till she
+jammed it in again&mdash;wrong side before, as a general thing, and
+green as a bird's egg, being a bashful cretur and easy sot back
+before company. But being wrong side before warn't much
+difference, anyway; becuz her own eye was sky- blue and the glass
+one was yaller on the front side, so whichever way she turned it
+it didn't match nohow.</p>
+
+<p>'Old Miss Wagner was considerable on the borrow, she was. When
+she had a quilting, or Dorcas S'iety at her house she gen'ally
+borrowed Miss Higgins's wooden leg to stump around on; it was
+considerable shorter than her other pin, but much she minded
+that. She said she couldn't abide crutches when she had company,
+becuz they were so slow; said when she had company and things had
+to be done, she wanted to get up and hump herself. She was as
+bald as a jug, and so she used to borrow Miss Jacops's wig&mdash;Miss
+Jacops was the coffin-peddler's wife&mdash;a ratty old buzzard, he
+was, that used to go roosting around where people was sick,
+waiting for 'em; and there that old rip would sit all day, in the
+shade, on a coffin that he judged would fit the can'idate; and if
+it was a slow customer and kind of uncertain, he'd fetch his
+rations and a blanket along and sleep in the coffin nights. He
+was anchored out that way, in frosty weather, for about three
+weeks, once, before old Robbins's place, waiting for him; and
+after that, for as much as two years, Jacops was not on speaking
+terms with the old man, on account of his disapp'inting him. He
+got one of his feet froze, and lost money, too, becuz old Robbins
+took a favorable turn and got well.
+
+</p>
+
+<a name="387"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="387.jpg (61K)" src="images/387.jpg" height="438" width="582">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>
+
+The next time Robbins got
+sick, Jacops tried to make up with him, and varnished up the same
+old coffin and fetched it along; but old Robbins was too many for
+him; he had him in, and 'peared to be powerful weak; he bought
+the coffin for ten dollars and Jacops was to pay it back and
+twenty-five more besides if Robbins didn't like the coffin after
+he'd tried it. And then Robbins died, and at the funeral he
+bursted off the lid and riz up in his shroud and told the parson
+to let up on the performances, becuz he could not stand such a
+coffin as that. You see he had been in a trance once before, when
+he was young, and he took the chances on another, cal'lating that
+if he made the trip it was money in his pocket, and if he missed
+fire he couldn't lose a cent. And by George he sued Jacops for
+the rhino and got jedgment; and he set up the coffin in his back
+parlor and said he 'lowed to take his time, now. It was always an
+aggravation to Jacops, the way that miserable old thing acted. He
+moved back to Indiany pretty soon&mdash;went to
+Wellsville&mdash;Wellsville was the place the Hogadorns was from. Mighty fine
+family. Old Maryland stock. Old Squire Hogadorn could carry
+around more mixed licker, and cuss better than most any man I
+ever see. His second wife was the widder Billings&mdash;she that was
+Becky Martin; her dam was deacon Dunlap's first wife. Her oldest
+child, Maria, married a missionary and died in grace&mdash;et up by
+the savages. They et him, too, poor feller&mdash;biled him. It warn't
+the custom, so they say, but they explained to friends of his'n
+that went down there to bring away his things, that they'd tried
+missionaries every other way and never could get any good out of
+'em&mdash;and so it annoyed all his relations to find out that that
+man's life was fooled away just out of a dern'd experiment, so to
+speak. But mind you, there ain't anything ever reely lost;
+everything that people can't understand and don't see the reason
+of does good if you only hold on and give it a fair shake;
+Prov'dence don't fire no blank ca'tridges, boys. That there
+missionary's substance, unbeknowns to himself, actu'ly converted
+every last one of them heathens that took a chance at the
+barbacue. Nothing ever fetched them but that. Don't tell me it
+was an accident that he was biled. There ain't no such a thing as
+an accident.</p>
+
+<a name="388"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="388.jpg (43K)" src="images/388.jpg" height="468" width="304">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>'When my uncle Lem was leaning up agin a scaffolding once,
+sick, or drunk, or suthin, an Irishman with a hod full of bricks
+fell on him out of the third story and broke the old man's back
+in two places. People said it was an accident. Much accident
+there was about that. He didn't know what he was there for, but
+he was there for a good object. If he hadn't been there the
+Irishman would have been killed. Nobody can ever make me believe
+anything different from that. Uncle Lem's dog was there. Why
+didn't the Irishman fall on the dog? Becuz the dog would a seen
+him a coming and stood from under. That's the reason the dog
+warn't appinted. A dog can't be depended on to carry out a
+special providence. Mark my words it was a put-up thing.
+Accidents don't happen, boys. Uncle Lem's dog&mdash;I wish you could a
+seen that dog. He was a reglar shepherd&mdash;or ruther he was part
+bull and part shepherd&mdash;splendid animal; belonged to parson Hagar
+before Uncle Lem got him. Parson Hagar belonged to the Western
+Reserve Hagars; prime family; his mother was a Watson; one of his
+sisters married a Wheeler; they settled in Morgan county, and he
+got nipped by the machinery in a carpet factory and went through
+in less than a quarter of a minute; his widder bought the piece
+of carpet that had his remains wove in, and people come a hundred
+mile to 'tend the funeral. There was fourteen yards in the
+piece.</p>
+
+<p>'She wouldn't let them roll him up, but planted him just
+so&mdash;full length. The church was middling small where they
+preached the funeral, and they had to let one end of the coffin
+stick out of the window. They didn't bury him&mdash;they planted one
+end, and let him stand up, same as a monument. And they nailed a
+sign on it and put&mdash;put on&mdash;put on it&mdash;"sacred to&mdash;the
+m-e-m-o-r-y&mdash;of fourteen y-a-r-d-s&mdash;of
+three-ply&mdash;car&mdash;-pet&mdash;containing all that
+was&mdash;m-o-r-t-a-l&mdash;of&mdash;of&mdash;W-i-l-l-i-a-m&mdash;W-h-e&mdash;"'</p>
+
+<a name="389"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="389.jpg (111K)" src="images/389.jpg" height="743" width="579">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>Jim Blaine had been growing gradually drowsy and drowsier&mdash;his
+head nodded, once, twice, three times&mdash;dropped peacefully upon
+his breast, and he fell tranquilly asleep. The tears were running
+down the boys' cheeks&mdash;they were suffocating with suppressed
+laughter&mdash;and had been from the start, though I had never noticed
+it. I perceived that I was "sold." I learned then that Jim
+Blaine's peculiarity was that whenever he reached a certain stage
+of intoxication, no human power could keep him from setting out,
+with impressive unction, to tell about a wonderful adventure
+which he had once had with his grandfather's old ram&mdash;and the
+mention of the ram in the first sentence was as far as any man
+had ever heard him get, concerning it. He always maundered off,
+interminably, from one thing to another, till his whisky got the
+best of him and he fell asleep. What the thing was that happened
+to him and his grandfather's old ram is a dark mystery to this
+day, for nobody has ever yet found out.</p>
+
+<a name="390"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="390.jpg (64K)" src="images/390.jpg" height="583" width="458">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+
+
+<br><br>
+<a name="ch54"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<h2>CHAPTER LIV.</h2>
+</center>
+<br>
+
+
+
+<p>Of course there was a large Chinese population in Virginia&mdash;it
+is the case with every town and city on the Pacific coast. They
+are a harmless race when white men either let them alone or treat
+them no worse than dogs; in fact they are almost entirely
+harmless anyhow, for they seldom think of resenting the vilest
+insults or the cruelest injuries. They are quiet, peaceable,
+tractable, free from drunkenness, and they are as industrious as
+the day is long. A disorderly Chinaman is rare, and a lazy one
+does not exist. So long as a Chinaman has strength to use his
+hands he needs no support from anybody; white men often complain
+of want of work, but a Chinaman offers no such complaint; he
+always manages to find something to do. He is a great convenience
+to everybody&mdash;even to the worst class of white men, for he bears
+the most of their sins, suffering fines for their petty thefts,
+imprisonment for their robberies, and death for their murders.
+Any white man can swear a Chinaman's life away in the courts, but
+no Chinaman can testify against a white man. Ours is the "land of
+the free"&mdash;nobody denies that&mdash;nobody challenges it. [Maybe it is
+because we won't let other people testify.] As I write, news
+comes that in broad daylight in San Francisco, some boys have
+stoned an inoffensive Chinaman to death, and that although a
+large crowd witnessed the shameful deed, no one interfered.</p>
+
+<p>There are seventy thousand (and possibly one hundred thousand)
+Chinamen on the Pacific coast. There were about a thousand in
+Virginia. They were penned into a "Chinese quarter"&mdash;a thing
+which they do not particularly object to, as they are fond of
+herding together. Their buildings were of wood; usually only one
+story high, and set thickly together along streets scarcely wide
+enough for a wagon to pass through. Their quarter was a little
+removed from the rest of the town. The chief employment of
+Chinamen in towns is to wash clothing. They always send a bill,
+like this below, pinned to the clothes. It is mere ceremony, for
+it does not enlighten the customer much.
+</p>
+
+<a name="392"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="392.jpg (12K)" src="images/392.jpg" height="593" width="131">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>
+Their price for washing
+was $2.50 per dozen&mdash;rather cheaper than white people could
+afford to wash for at that time. A very common sign on the
+Chinese houses was: "See Yup, Washer and Ironer"; "Hong Wo,
+Washer"; "Sam Sing &amp; Ah Hop, Washing." The house servants, cooks,
+etc., in California and Nevada, were chiefly Chinamen. There were
+few white servants and no Chinawomen so employed. Chinamen make
+good house servants, being quick, obedient, patient, quick to
+learn and tirelessly industrious. They do not need to be taught a
+thing twice, as a general thing. They are imitative. If a
+Chinaman were to see his master break up a centre table, in a
+passion, and kindle a fire with it, that Chinaman would be likely
+to resort to the furniture for fuel forever afterward.</p>
+
+<a name="393"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="393.jpg (42K)" src="images/393.jpg" height="408" width="394">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>All Chinamen can read, write and cipher with easy
+facility&mdash;pity but all our petted voters could. In California
+they rent little patches of ground and do a deal of gardening.
+They will raise surprising crops of vegetables on a sand pile.
+They waste nothing. What is rubbish to a Christian, a Chinaman
+carefully preserves and makes useful in one way or another. He
+gathers up all the old oyster and sardine cans that white people
+throw away, and procures marketable tin and solder from them by
+melting. He gathers up old bones and turns them into manure. In
+California he gets a living out of old mining claims that white
+men have abandoned as exhausted and worthless&mdash;and then the
+officers come down on him once a month with an exorbitant swindle
+to which the legislature has given the broad, general name of
+"foreign" mining tax, but it is usually inflicted on no
+foreigners but Chinamen. This swindle has in some cases been
+repeated once or twice on the same victim in the course of the
+same month&mdash;but the public treasury was no additionally enriched
+by it, probably.</p>
+
+<p>Chinamen hold their dead in great reverence&mdash;they worship
+their departed ancestors, in fact. Hence, in China, a man's front
+yard, back yard, or any other part of his premises, is made his
+family burying ground, in order that he may visit the graves at
+any and all times. Therefore that huge empire is one mighty
+cemetery; it is ridged and wringled from its centre to its
+circumference with graves&mdash;and inasmuch as every foot of ground
+must be made to do its utmost, in China, lest the swarming
+population suffer for food, the very graves are cultivated and
+yield a harvest, custom holding this to be no dishonor to the
+dead. Since the departed are held in such worshipful reverence, a
+Chinaman cannot bear that any indignity be offered the places
+where they sleep. Mr. Burlingame said that herein lay China's
+bitter opposition to railroads; a road could not be built
+anywhere in the empire without disturbing the graves of their
+ancestors or friends.</p>
+
+<p>A Chinaman hardly believes he could enjoy the hereafter except
+his body lay in his beloved China; also, he desires to receive,
+himself, after death, that worship with which he has honored his
+dead that preceded him. Therefore, if he visits a foreign
+country, he makes arrangements to have his bones returned to
+China in case he dies; if he hires to go to a foreign country on
+a labor contract, there is always a stipulation that his body
+shall be taken back to China if he dies; if the government sells
+a gang of Coolies to a foreigner for the usual five-year term, it
+is specified in the contract that their bodies shall be restored
+to China in case of death. On the Pacific coast the Chinamen all
+belong to one or another of several great companies or
+organizations, and these companies keep track of their members,
+register their names, and ship their bodies home when they die.
+The See Yup Company is held to be the largest of these. The Ning
+Yeong Company is next, and numbers eighteen thousand members on
+the coast. Its headquarters are at San Francisco, where it has a
+costly temple, several great officers (one of whom keeps regal
+state in seclusion and cannot be approached by common humanity),
+and a numerous priesthood. In it I was shown a register of its
+members, with the dead and the date of their shipment to China
+duly marked. Every ship that sails from San Francisco carries
+away a heavy freight of Chinese corpses&mdash;or did, at least, until
+the legislature, with an ingenious refinement of Christian
+cruelty, forbade the shipments, as a neat underhanded way of
+deterring Chinese immigration. The bill was offered, whether it
+passed or not. It is my impression that it passed. There was
+another bill&mdash;it became a law&mdash;compelling every incoming Chinaman
+to be vaccinated on the wharf and pay a duly appointed quack (no
+decent doctor would defile himself with such legalized robbery)
+ten dollars for it. As few importers of Chinese would want to go
+to an expense like that, the law-makers thought this would be
+another heavy blow to Chinese immigration.</p>
+
+<p>What the Chinese quarter of Virginia was like&mdash;or, indeed,
+what the Chinese quarter of any Pacific coast town was and is
+like&mdash;may be gathered from this item which I printed in the
+Enterprise while reporting for that paper:</p>
+
+<blockquote><blockquote>
+<p>CHINATOWN.&mdash;Accompanied by a fellow reporter, we made a trip
+through our Chinese quarter the other night. The Chinese have
+built their portion of the city to suit themselves; and as they
+keep neither carriages nor wagons, their streets are not wide
+enough, as a general thing, to admit of the passage of vehicles.
+At ten o'clock at night the Chinaman may be seen in all his
+glory. In every little cooped-up, dingy cavern of a hut, faint
+with the odor of burning Josh-lights and with nothing to see the
+gloom by save the sickly, guttering tallow candle, were two or
+three yellow, long-tailed vagabonds, coiled up on a sort of short
+truckle-bed, smoking opium, motionless and with their lustreless
+eyes turned inward from excess of satisfaction&mdash;or rather the
+recent smoker looks thus, immediately after having passed the
+pipe to his neighbor&mdash;for opium-smoking is a comfortless
+operation, and requires constant attention. A lamp sits on the
+bed, the length of the long pipe-stem from the smoker's mouth; he
+puts a pellet of opium on the end of a wire, sets it on fire, and
+plasters it into the pipe much as a Christian would fill a hole
+with putty; then he applies the bowl to the lamp and proceeds to
+smoke&mdash;and the stewing and frying of the drug and the gurgling of
+the juices in the stem would well-nigh turn the stomach of a
+statue. John likes it, though; it soothes him, he takes about two
+dozen whiffs, and then rolls over to dream, Heaven only knows
+what, for we could not imagine by looking at the soggy creature.
+Possibly in his visions he travels far away from the gross world
+and his regular washing, and feast on succulent rats and
+birds'-nests in Paradise.</p>
+
+<p>Mr. Ah Sing keeps a general grocery and provision store at No.
+13 Wang street. He lavished his hospitality upon our party in the
+friendliest way. He had various kinds of colored and colorless
+wines and brandies, with unpronouncable names, imported from
+China in little crockery jugs, and which he offered to us in
+dainty little miniature wash-basins of porcelain. He offered us a
+mess of birds'-nests; also, small, neat sausages, of which we
+could have swallowed several yards if we had chosen to try, but
+we suspected that each link contained the corpse of a mouse, and
+therefore refrained. Mr. Sing had in his store a thousand
+articles of merchandise, curious to behold, impossible to imagine
+the uses of, and beyond our ability to describe.</p>
+
+<p>His ducks, however, and his eggs, we could understand; the
+former were split open and flattened out like codfish, and came
+from China in that shape, and the latter were plastered over with
+some kind of paste which kept them fresh and palatable through
+the long voyage.</p>
+
+<p>We found Mr. Hong Wo, No. 37 Chow-chow street, making up a
+lottery scheme&mdash;in fact we found a dozen others occupied in the
+same way in various parts of the quarter, for about every third
+Chinaman runs a lottery, and the balance of the tribe "buck" at
+it. "Tom," who speaks faultless English, and used to be chief and
+only cook to the Territorial Enterprise, when the establishment
+kept bachelor's hall two years ago, said that "Sometime Chinaman
+buy ticket one dollar hap, ketch um two tree hundred, sometime no
+ketch um anything; lottery like one man fight um seventy&mdash;may-be
+he whip, may-be he get whip heself, welly good."</p>
+
+<a name="396"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="396.jpg (69K)" src="images/396.jpg" height="480" width="442">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>However, the percentage being sixty-nine against him, the
+chances are, as a general thing, that "he get whip heself." We
+could not see that these lotteries differed in any respect from
+our own, save that the figures being Chinese, no ignorant white
+man might ever hope to succeed in telling "t'other from which;"
+the manner of drawing is similar to ours.</p>
+
+<p>Mr. See Yup keeps a fancy store on Live Fox street. He sold us
+fans of white feathers, gorgeously ornamented; perfumery that
+smelled like Limburger cheese, Chinese pens, and watch-charms
+made of a stone unscratchable with steel instruments, yet
+polished and tinted like the inner coat of a sea-shell. As tokens
+of his esteem, See Yup presented the party with gaudy plumes made
+of gold tinsel and trimmed with peacocks' feathers.</p>
+
+<p>We ate chow-chow with chop-sticks in the celestial
+restaurants; our comrade chided the moon-eyed damsels in front of
+the houses for their want of feminine reserve; we received
+protecting Josh-lights from our hosts and "dickered" for a pagan
+God or two. Finally, we were impressed with the genius of a
+Chinese book-keeper; he figured up his accounts on a machine like
+a gridiron with buttons strung on its bars; the different rows
+represented units, tens, hundreds and thousands. He fingered them
+with incredible rapidity&mdash;in fact, he pushed them from place to
+place as fast as a musical professor's fingers travel over the
+keys of a piano.</p>
+</blockquote></blockquote>
+
+<p>They are a kindly disposed, well-meaning race, and are
+respected and well treated by the upper classes, all over the
+Pacific coast. No Californian gentleman or lady ever abuses or
+oppresses a Chinaman, under any circumstances, an explanation
+that seems to be much needed in the East. Only the scum of the
+population do it&mdash;they and their children; they, and, naturally
+and consistently, the policemen and politicians, likewise, for
+these are the dust-licking pimps and slaves of the scum, there as
+well as elsewhere in America.</p>
+
+<a name="397"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="397.jpg (76K)" src="images/397.jpg" height="432" width="550">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+
+
+<br><br>
+<a name="ch55"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<h2>CHAPTER LV.</h2>
+</center>
+<br>
+
+
+
+<p>I began to get tired of staying in one place so long.</p>
+
+<p>There was no longer satisfying variety in going down to Carson
+to report the proceedings of the legislature once a year, and
+horse-races and pumpkin-shows once in three months; (they had got
+to raising pumpkins and potatoes in Washoe Valley, and of course
+one of the first achievements of the legislature was to institute
+a ten-thousand-dollar Agricultural Fair to show off forty
+dollars' worth of those pumpkins in&mdash;however, the territorial
+legislature was usually spoken of as the "asylum"). I wanted to
+see San Francisco. I wanted to go somewhere. I wanted&mdash;I did not
+know what I wanted. I had the "spring fever" and wanted a change,
+principally, no doubt. Besides, a convention had framed a State
+Constitution; nine men out of every ten wanted an office; I
+believed that these gentlemen would "treat" the moneyless and the
+irresponsible among the population into adopting the constitution
+and thus well-nigh killing the country (it could not well carry
+such a load as a State government, since it had nothing to tax
+that could stand a tax, for undeveloped mines could not, and
+there were not fifty developed ones in the land, there was but
+little realty to tax, and it did seem as if nobody was ever going
+to think of the simple salvation of inflicting a money penalty on
+murder). I believed that a State government would destroy the
+"flush times," and I wanted to get away. I believed that the
+mining stocks I had on hand would soon be worth $100,000, and
+thought if they reached that before the Constitution was adopted,
+I would sell out and make myself secure from the crash the change
+of government was going to bring. I considered $100,000
+sufficient to go home with decently, though it was but a small
+amount compared to what I had been expecting to return with. I
+felt rather down-hearted about it, but I tried to comfort myself
+with the reflection that with such a sum I could not fall into
+want. About this time a schoolmate of mine whom I had not seen
+since boyhood, came tramping in on foot from Reese River, a very
+allegory of Poverty. The son of wealthy parents, here he was, in
+a strange land, hungry, bootless, mantled in an ancient
+horse-blanket, roofed with a brimless hat, and so generally and
+so extravagantly dilapidated that he could have "taken the shine
+out of the Prodigal Son himself," as he pleasantly remarked.</p>
+
+<a name="399"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="399.jpg (43K)" src="images/399.jpg" height="545" width="312">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>He wanted to borrow forty-six dollars&mdash;twenty-six to take him
+to San Francisco, and twenty for something else; to buy some soap
+with, maybe, for he needed it. I found I had but little more than
+the amount wanted, in my pocket; so I stepped in and borrowed
+forty-six dollars of a banker (on twenty days' time, without the
+formality of a note), and gave it him, rather than walk half a
+block to the office, where I had some specie laid up. If anybody
+had told me that it would take me two years to pay back that
+forty-six dollars to the banker (for I did not expect it of the
+Prodigal, and was not disappointed), I would have felt injured.
+And so would the banker.</p>
+
+<p>I wanted a change. I wanted variety of some kind. It came. Mr.
+Goodman went away for a week and left me the post of chief
+editor. It destroyed me. The first day, I wrote my "leader" in
+the forenoon. The second day, I had no subject and put it off
+till the afternoon. The third day I put it off till evening, and
+then copied an elaborate editorial out of the "American
+Cyclopedia," that steadfast friend of the editor, all over this
+land. The fourth day I "fooled around" till midnight, and then
+fell back on the Cyclopedia again. The fifth day I cudgeled my
+brain till midnight, and then kept the press waiting while I
+penned some bitter personalities on six different people. The
+sixth day I labored in anguish till far into the night and
+brought forth&mdash;nothing. The paper went to press without an
+editorial. The seventh day I resigned. On the eighth, Mr. Goodman
+returned and found six duels on his hands&mdash;my personalities had
+borne fruit.</p>
+
+<p>Nobody, except he has tried it, knows what it is to be an
+editor. It is easy to scribble local rubbish, with the facts all
+before you; it is easy to clip selections from other papers; it
+is easy to string out a correspondence from any locality; but it
+is unspeakable hardship to write editorials. Subjects are the
+trouble&mdash;the dreary lack of them, I mean. Every day, it is drag,
+drag, drag&mdash;think, and worry and suffer&mdash;all the world is a dull
+blank, and yet the editorial columns must be filled. Only give
+the editor a subject, and his work is done&mdash;it is no trouble to
+write it up; but fancy how you would feel if you had to pump your
+brains dry every day in the week, fifty-two weeks in the year. It
+makes one low spirited simply to think of it. The matter that
+each editor of a daily paper in America writes in the course of a
+year would fill from four to eight bulky volumes like this book!
+Fancy what a library an editor's work would make, after twenty or
+thirty years' service. Yet people often marvel that Dickens,
+Scott, Bulwer, Dumas, etc., have been able to produce so many
+books. If these authors had wrought as voluminously as newspaper
+editors do, the result would be something to marvel at, indeed.
+How editors can continue this tremendous labor, this exhausting
+consumption of brain fibre (for their work is creative, and not a
+mere mechanical laying-up of facts, like reporting), day after
+day and year after year, is incomprehensible. Preachers take two
+months' holiday in midsummer, for they find that to produce two
+sermons a week is wearing, in the long run. In truth it must be
+so, and is so; and therefore, how an editor can take from ten to
+twenty texts and build upon them from ten to twenty painstaking
+editorials a week and keep it up all the year round, is farther
+beyond comprehension than ever. Ever since I survived my week as
+editor, I have found at least one pleasure in any newspaper that
+comes to my hand; it is in admiring the long columns of
+editorial, and wondering to myself how in the mischief he did
+it!</p>
+
+<p>Mr. Goodman's return relieved me of employment, unless I chose
+to become a reporter again. I could not do that; I could not
+serve in the ranks after being General of the army. So I thought
+I would depart and go abroad into the world somewhere. Just at
+this juncture, Dan, my associate in the reportorial department,
+told me, casually, that two citizens had been trying to persuade
+him to go with them to New York and aid in selling a rich silver
+mine which they had discovered and secured in a new mining
+district in our neighborhood. He said they offered to pay his
+expenses and give him one third of the proceeds of the sale. He
+had refused to go. It was the very opportunity I wanted. I abused
+him for keeping so quiet about it, and not mentioning it sooner.
+He said it had not occurred to him that I would like to go, and
+so he had recommended them to apply to Marshall, the reporter of
+the other paper. I asked Dan if it was a good, honest mine, and
+no swindle. He said the men had shown him nine tons of the rock,
+which they had got out to take to New York, and he could
+cheerfully say that he had seen but little rock in Nevada that
+was richer; and moreover, he said that they had secured a tract
+of valuable timber and a mill-site, near the mine. My first idea
+was to kill Dan. But I changed my mind, notwithstanding I was so
+angry, for I thought maybe the chance was not yet lost. Dan said
+it was by no means lost; that the men were absent at the mine
+again, and would not be in Virginia to leave for the East for
+some ten days; that they had requested him to do the talking to
+Marshall, and he had promised that he would either secure
+Marshall or somebody else for them by the time they got back; he
+would now say nothing to anybody till they returned, and then
+fulfil his promise by furnishing me to them.</p>
+
+<p>It was splendid. I went to bed all on fire with excitement;
+for nobody had yet gone East to sell a Nevada silver mine, and
+the field was white for the sickle. I felt that such a mine as
+the one described by Dan would bring a princely sum in New York,
+and sell without delay or difficulty. I could not sleep, my fancy
+so rioted through its castles in the air. It was the "blind lead"
+come again.</p>
+
+<p>Next day I got away, on the coach, with the usual eclat
+attending departures of old citizens,&mdash;for if you have only half
+a dozen friends out there they will make noise for a hundred
+rather than let you seem to go away neglected and
+unregretted&mdash;and Dan promised to keep strict watch for the men
+that had the mine to sell.</p>
+
+<p>The trip was signalized but by one little incident, and that
+occurred just as we were about to start. A very seedy looking
+vagabond passenger got out of the stage a moment to wait till the
+usual ballast of silver bricks was thrown in. He was standing on
+the pavement, when an awkward express employee, carrying a brick
+weighing a hundred pounds, stumbled and let it fall on the
+bummer's foot. He instantly dropped on the ground and began to
+howl in the most heart-breaking way. A sympathizing crowd
+gathered around and were going to pull his boot off; but he
+screamed louder than ever and they desisted; then he fell to
+gasping, and between the gasps ejaculated "Brandy! for Heaven's
+sake, brandy!" They poured half a pint down him, and it
+wonderfully restored and comforted him. Then he begged the people
+to assist him to the stage, which was done. The express people
+urged him to have a doctor at their expense, but he declined, and
+said that if he only had a little brandy to take along with him,
+to soothe his paroxyms of pain when they came on, he would be
+grateful and content. He was quickly supplied with two bottles,
+and we drove off. He was so smiling and happy after that, that I
+could not refrain from asking him how he could possibly be so
+comfortable with a crushed foot.</p>
+
+<a name="403"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="403.jpg (72K)" src="images/403.jpg" height="622" width="388">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>"Well," said he, "I hadn't had a drink for twelve hours, and
+hadn't a cent to my name. I was most perishing&mdash;and so, when that
+duffer dropped that hundred-pounder on my foot, I see my chance.
+Got a cork leg, you know!" and he pulled up his pantaloons and
+proved it.</p>
+
+<p>He was as drunk as a lord all day long, and full of chucklings
+over his timely ingenuity.</p>
+
+<p>One drunken man necessarily reminds one of another. I once
+heard a gentleman tell about an incident which he witnessed in a
+Californian bar- room. He entitled it "Ye Modest Man Taketh a
+Drink." It was nothing but a bit of acting, but it seemed to me a
+perfect rendering, and worthy of Toodles himself. The modest man,
+tolerably far gone with beer and other matters, enters a saloon
+(twenty-five cents is the price for anything and everything, and
+specie the only money used) and lays down a half dollar; calls
+for whiskey and drinks it; the bar-keeper makes change and lays
+the quarter in a wet place on the counter; the modest man fumbles
+at it with nerveless fingers, but it slips and the water holds
+it; he contemplates it, and tries again; same result; observes
+that people are interested in what he is at, blushes; fumbles at
+the quarter again&mdash;blushes&mdash;puts his forefinger carefully, slowly
+down, to make sure of his aim&mdash;pushes the coin toward the
+bar-keeper, and says with a sigh:</p>
+
+<a name="404"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="404.jpg (120K)" src="images/404.jpg" height="754" width="582">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>"Gimme a cigar!"</p>
+
+<p>Naturally, another gentleman present told about another
+drunken man. He said he reeled toward home late at night; made a
+mistake and entered the wrong gate; thought he saw a dog on the
+stoop; and it was&mdash;an iron one.</p>
+
+<p>He stopped and considered; wondered if it was a dangerous dog;
+ventured to say "Be (hic) begone!" No effect. Then he approached
+warily, and adopted conciliation; pursed up his lips and tried to
+whistle, but failed; still approached, saying, "Poor dog!&mdash;doggy,
+doggy, doggy!&mdash;poor doggy-dog!" Got up on the stoop, still
+petting with fond names; till master of the advantages; then
+exclaimed, "Leave, you thief!"&mdash;planted a vindictive kick in his
+ribs, and went head-over-heels overboard, of course. A pause; a
+sigh or two of pain, and then a remark in a reflective voice:</p>
+
+<p>"Awful solid dog. What could he ben eating? ('ic!) Rocks,
+p'raps. Such animals is dangerous.&mdash;' At's what I say&mdash;they're
+dangerous. If a man&mdash;('ic!)&mdash;if a man wants to feed a dog on
+rocks, let him feed him on rocks; 'at's all right; but let him
+keep him at home&mdash;not have him layin' round promiscuous, where
+('ic!) where people's liable to stumble over him when they ain't
+noticin'!"</p>
+
+<p>It was not without regret that I took a last look at the tiny
+flag (it was thirty-five feet long and ten feet wide) fluttering
+like a lady's handkerchief from the topmost peak of Mount
+Davidson, two thousand feet above Virginia's roofs, and felt that
+doubtless I was bidding a permanent farewell to a city which had
+afforded me the most vigorous enjoyment of life I had ever
+experienced. And this reminds me of an incident which the dullest
+memory Virginia could boast at the time it happened must vividly
+recall, at times, till its possessor dies. Late one summer
+afternoon we had a rain shower.</p>
+
+<p>That was astonishing enough, in itself, to set the whole town
+buzzing, for it only rains (during a week or two weeks) in the
+winter in Nevada, and even then not enough at a time to make it
+worth while for any merchant to keep umbrellas for sale. But the
+rain was not the chief wonder. It only lasted five or ten
+minutes; while the people were still talking about it all the
+heavens gathered to themselves a dense blackness as of midnight.
+All the vast eastern front of Mount Davidson, over- looking the
+city, put on such a funereal gloom that only the nearness and
+solidity of the mountain made its outlines even faintly
+distinguishable from the dead blackness of the heavens they
+rested against. This unaccustomed sight turned all eyes toward
+the mountain; and as they looked, a little tongue of rich golden
+flame was seen waving and quivering in the heart of the midnight,
+away up on the extreme summit! In a few minutes the streets were
+packed with people, gazing with hardly an uttered word, at the
+one brilliant mote in the brooding world of darkness. It flicked
+like a candle-flame, and looked no larger; but with such a
+background it was wonderfully bright, small as it was. It was the
+flag!&mdash;though no one suspected it at first, it seemed so like a
+supernatural visitor of some kind&mdash;a mysterious messenger of good
+tidings, some were fain to believe. It was the nation's emblem
+transfigured by the departing rays of a sun that was entirely
+palled from view; and on no other object did the glory fall, in
+all the broad panorama of mountain ranges and deserts. Not even
+upon the staff of the flag&mdash;for that, a needle in the distance at
+any time, was now untouched by the light and undistinguishable in
+the gloom. For a whole hour the weird visitor winked and burned
+in its lofty solitude, and still the thousands of uplifted eyes
+watched it with fascinated interest. How the people were wrought
+up! The superstition grew apace that this was a mystic courier
+come with great news from the war&mdash;the poetry of the idea
+excusing and commending it&mdash;and on it spread, from heart to
+heart, from lip to lip and from street to street, till there was
+a general impulse to have out the military and welcome the bright
+waif with a salvo of artillery!</p>
+
+<a name="406"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="406.jpg (72K)" src="images/406.jpg" height="450" width="546">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>And all that time one sorely tried man, the telegraph operator
+sworn to official secrecy, had to lock his lips and chain his
+tongue with a silence that was like to rend them; for he, and he
+only, of all the speculating multitude, knew the great things
+this sinking sun had seen that day in the east&mdash;Vicksburg fallen,
+and the Union arms victorious at Gettysburg!</p>
+
+<p>But for the journalistic monopoly that forbade the slightest
+revealment of eastern news till a day after its publication in
+the California papers, the glorified flag on Mount Davidson would
+have been saluted and re-saluted, that memorable evening, as long
+as there was a charge of powder to thunder with; the city would
+have been illuminated, and every man that had any respect for
+himself would have got drunk,&mdash;as was the custom of the country
+on all occasions of public moment. Even at this distant day I
+cannot think of this needlessly marred supreme opportunity
+without regret. What a time we might have had!</p>
+
+<a name="407"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="407.jpg (12K)" src="images/407.jpg" height="240" width="269">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+
+
+<br><br>
+<a name="ch56"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<h2>CHAPTER LVI.</h2>
+</center>
+<br>
+
+
+
+<p>We rumbled over the plains and valleys, climbed the Sierras to
+the clouds, and looked down upon summer-clad California. And I
+will remark here, in passing, that all scenery in California
+requires distance to give it its highest charm. The mountains are
+imposing in their sublimity and their majesty of form and
+altitude, from any point of view&mdash;but one must have distance to
+soften their ruggedness and enrich their tintings; a Californian
+forest is best at a little distance, for there is a sad poverty
+of variety in species, the trees being chiefly of one monotonous
+family&mdash;redwood, pine, spruce, fir&mdash;and so, at a near view there
+is a wearisome sameness of attitude in their rigid arms,
+stretched down ward and outward in one continued and reiterated
+appeal to all men to "Sh!&mdash;don't say a word!&mdash;you might disturb
+somebody!" Close at hand, too, there is a reliefless and
+relentless smell of pitch and turpentine; there is a ceaseless
+melancholy in their sighing and complaining foliage; one walks
+over a soundless carpet of beaten yellow bark and dead spines of
+the foliage till he feels like a wandering spirit bereft of a
+footfall; he tires of the endless tufts of needles and yearns for
+substantial, shapely leaves; he looks for moss and grass to loll
+upon, and finds none, for where there is no bark there is naked
+clay and dirt, enemies to pensive musing and clean apparel. Often
+a grassy plain in California, is what it should be, but often,
+too, it is best contemplated at a distance, because although its
+grass blades are tall, they stand up vindictively straight and
+self-sufficient, and are unsociably wide apart, with uncomely
+spots of barren sand between.</p>
+
+<p>One of the queerest things I know of, is to hear tourists from
+"the States" go into ecstasies over the loveliness of
+"ever-blooming California." And they always do go into that sort
+of ecstasies. But perhaps they would modify them if they knew how
+old Californians, with the memory full upon them of the
+dust-covered and questionable summer greens of Californian
+"verdure," stand astonished, and filled with worshipping
+admiration, in the presence of the lavish richness, the brilliant
+green, the infinite freshness, the spend-thrift variety of form
+and species and foliage that make an Eastern landscape a vision
+of Paradise itself. The idea of a man falling into raptures over
+grave and sombre California, when that man has seen New England's
+meadow-expanses and her maples, oaks and cathedral-windowed elms
+decked in summer attire, or the opaline splendors of autumn
+descending upon her forests, comes very near being funny&mdash;would
+be, in fact, but that it is so pathetic. No land with an
+unvarying climate can be very beautiful. The tropics are not, for
+all the sentiment that is wasted on them. They seem beautiful at
+first, but sameness impairs the charm by and by. Change is the
+handmaiden Nature requires to do her miracles with. The land that
+has four well-defined seasons, cannot lack beauty, or pall with
+monotony. Each season brings a world of enjoyment and interest in
+the watching of its unfolding, its gradual, harmonious
+development, its culminating graces&mdash;and just as one begins to
+tire of it, it passes away and a radical change comes, with new
+witcheries and new glories in its train. And I think that to one
+in sympathy with nature, each season, in its turn, seems the
+loveliest.</p>
+
+<a name="409"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="409.jpg (49K)" src="images/409.jpg" height="434" width="369">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>San Francisco, a truly fascinating city to live in, is stately
+and handsome at a fair distance, but close at hand one notes that
+the architecture is mostly old-fashioned, many streets are made
+up of decaying, smoke-grimed, wooden houses, and the barren
+sand-hills toward the outskirts obtrude themselves too
+prominently. Even the kindly climate is sometimes pleasanter when
+read about than personally experienced, for a lovely, cloudless
+sky wears out its welcome by and by, and then when the longed for
+rain does come it stays. Even the playful earthquake is better
+contemplated at a dis&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>However there are varying opinions about that.</p>
+
+<p>The climate of San Francisco is mild and singularly equable.
+The thermometer stands at about seventy degrees the year round.
+It hardly changes at all. You sleep under one or two light
+blankets Summer and Winter, and never use a mosquito bar. Nobody
+ever wears Summer clothing. You wear black broadcloth&mdash;if you
+have it&mdash;in August and January, just the same. It is no colder,
+and no warmer, in the one month than the other. You do not use
+overcoats and you do not use fans. It is as pleasant a climate as
+could well be contrived, take it all around, and is doubtless the
+most unvarying in the whole world. The wind blows there a good
+deal in the summer months, but then you can go over to Oakland,
+if you choose&mdash;three or four miles away&mdash;it does not blow there.
+It has only snowed twice in San Francisco in nineteen years, and
+then it only remained on the ground long enough to astonish the
+children, and set them to wondering what the feathery stuff
+was.</p>
+
+<a name="410"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="410.jpg (53K)" src="images/410.jpg" height="347" width="534">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>During eight months of the year, straight along, the skies are
+bright and cloudless, and never a drop of rain falls. But when
+the other four months come along, you will need to go and steal
+an umbrella. Because you will require it. Not just one day, but
+one hundred and twenty days in hardly varying succession. When
+you want to go visiting, or attend church, or the theatre, you
+never look up at the clouds to see whether it is likely to rain
+or not&mdash;you look at the almanac. If it is Winter, it will
+rain&mdash;and if it is Summer, it won't rain, and you cannot help it.
+You never need a lightning-rod, because it never thunders and it
+never lightens. And after you have listened for six or eight
+weeks, every night, to the dismal monotony of those quiet rains,
+you will wish in your heart the thunder would leap and crash and
+roar along those drowsy skies once, and make everything
+alive&mdash;you will wish the prisoned lightnings would cleave the
+dull firmament asunder and light it with a blinding glare for one
+little instant. You would give anything to hear the old familiar
+thunder again and see the lightning strike somebody. And along in
+the Summer, when you have suffered about four months of lustrous,
+pitiless sunshine, you are ready to go down on your knees and
+plead for rain&mdash;hail&mdash;snow&mdash;thunder and lightning&mdash;anything to
+break the monotony&mdash;you will take an earthquake, if you cannot
+do any better. And the chances are that you'll get it, too.</p>
+
+<p>San Francisco is built on sand hills, but they are prolific
+sand hills. They yield a generous vegetation. All the rare
+flowers which people in "the States" rear with such patient care
+in parlor flower-pots and green- houses, flourish luxuriantly in
+the open air there all the year round. Calla lilies, all sorts of
+geraniums, passion flowers, moss roses&mdash;I do not know the names
+of a tenth part of them. I only know that while New Yorkers are
+burdened with banks and drifts of snow, Californians are burdened
+with banks and drifts of flowers, if they only keep their hands
+off and let them grow. And I have heard that they have also that
+rarest and most curious of all the flowers, the beautiful
+Espiritu Santo, as the Spaniards call it&mdash;or flower of the Holy
+Spirit&mdash;though I thought it grew only in Central America&mdash;down on
+the Isthmus. In its cup is the daintiest little facsimile of a
+dove, as pure as snow. The Spaniards have a superstitious
+reverence for it. The blossom has been conveyed to the States,
+submerged in ether; and the bulb has been taken thither also, but
+every attempt to make it bloom after it arrived, has failed.</p>
+
+<p>I have elsewhere spoken of the endless Winter of Mono,
+California, and but this moment of the eternal Spring of San
+Francisco. Now if we travel a hundred miles in a straight line,
+we come to the eternal Summer of Sacramento. One never sees
+Summer-clothing or mosquitoes in San Francisco&mdash;but they can be
+found in Sacramento. Not always and unvaryingly, but about one
+hundred and forty-three months out of twelve years, perhaps.
+Flowers bloom there, always, the reader can easily
+believe&mdash;people suffer and sweat, and swear, morning, noon and
+night, and wear out their stanchest energies fanning themselves.
+It gets hot there, but if you go down to Fort Yuma you will find
+it hotter. Fort Yuma is probably the hottest place on earth. The
+thermometer stays at one hundred and twenty in the shade there
+all the time&mdash;except when it varies and goes higher. It is a U.S.
+military post, and its occupants get so used to the terrific heat
+that they suffer without it. There is a tradition (attributed to
+John Phenix [It has been purloined by fifty different scribblers
+who were too poor to invent a fancy but not ashamed to steal
+one.&mdash;M. T.]) that a very, very wicked soldier died there, once,
+and of course, went straight to the hottest corner of
+perdition,&mdash;and the next day he telegraphed back for his
+blankets. There is no doubt about the truth of this
+statement&mdash;there can be no doubt about it. I have seen the place
+where that soldier used to board. In Sacramento it is fiery
+Summer always, and you can gather roses, and eat strawberries and
+ice-cream, and wear white linen clothes, and pant and perspire,
+at eight or nine o'clock in the morning, and then take the cars,
+and at noon put on your furs and your skates, and go skimming
+over frozen Donner Lake, seven thousand feet above the valley,
+among snow banks fifteen feet deep, and in the shadow of grand
+mountain peaks that lift their frosty crags ten thousand feet
+above the level of the sea.</p>
+
+<a name="413"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="413.jpg (94K)" src="images/413.jpg" height="502" width="611">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>There is a transition for you! Where will you find another
+like it in the Western hemisphere? And some of us have swept
+around snow-walled curves of the Pacific Railroad in that
+vicinity, six thousand feet above the sea, and looked down as the
+birds do, upon the deathless Summer of the Sacramento Valley,
+with its fruitful fields, its feathery foliage, its silver
+streams, all slumbering in the mellow haze of its enchanted
+atmosphere, and all infinitely softened and spiritualized by
+distance&mdash;a dreamy, exquisite glimpse of fairyland, made all the
+more charming and striking that it was caught through a forbidden
+gateway of ice and snow, and savage crags and precipices.</p>
+
+
+
+<br><br>
+<a name="ch57"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<h2>CHAPTER LVII.</h2>
+</center>
+<br>
+
+
+<p>It was in this Sacramento Valley, just referred to, that a
+deal of the most lucrative of the early gold mining was done, and
+you may still see, in places, its grassy slopes and levels torn
+and guttered and disfigured by the avaricious spoilers of fifteen
+and twenty years ago. You may see such disfigurements far and
+wide over California&mdash;and in some such places, where only meadows
+and forests are visible&mdash;not a living creature, not a house, no
+stick or stone or remnant of a ruin, and not a sound, not even a
+whisper to disturb the Sabbath stillness&mdash;you will find it hard
+to believe that there stood at one time a fiercely-flourishing
+little city, of two thousand or three thousand souls, with its
+newspaper, fire company, brass band, volunteer militia, bank,
+hotels, noisy Fourth of July processions and speeches, gambling
+hells crammed with tobacco smoke, profanity, and rough-bearded
+men of all nations and colors, with tables heaped with gold dust
+sufficient for the revenues of a German principality&mdash;streets
+crowded and rife with business&mdash;town lots worth four hundred
+dollars a front foot&mdash;labor, laughter, music, dancing, swearing,
+fighting, shooting, stabbing&mdash;a bloody inquest and a man for
+breakfast every morning&mdash;everything that delights and adorns
+existence&mdash;all the appointments and appurtenances of a thriving
+and prosperous and promising young city,&mdash;and now nothing is left
+of it all but a lifeless, homeless solitude. The men are gone,
+the houses have vanished, even the name of the place is
+forgotten. In no other land, in modern times, have towns so
+absolutely died and disappeared, as in the old mining regions of
+California.</p>
+
+<p>It was a driving, vigorous, restless population in those days.
+It was a curious population. It was the only population of the
+kind that the world has ever seen gathered together, and it is
+not likely that the world will ever see its like again. For
+observe, it was an assemblage of two hundred thousand young
+men&mdash;not simpering, dainty, kid-gloved weaklings, but stalwart,
+muscular, dauntless young braves, brimful of push and energy, and
+royally endowed with every attribute that goes to make up a
+peerless and magnificent manhood&mdash;the very pick and choice of the
+world's glorious ones. No women, no children, no gray and
+stooping veterans,&mdash;none but erect, bright-eyed, quick-moving,
+strong-handed young giants&mdash;the strangest population, the finest
+population, the most gallant host that ever trooped down the
+startled solitudes of an unpeopled land. And where are they now?
+Scattered to the ends of the earth&mdash;or prematurely aged and
+decrepit&mdash;or shot or stabbed in street affrays&mdash;or dead of
+disappointed hopes and broken hearts&mdash;all gone, or nearly
+all&mdash;victims devoted upon the altar of the golden calf&mdash;the noblest
+holocaust that ever wafted its sacrificial incense heavenward. It
+is pitiful to think upon.</p>
+
+<p>It was a splendid population&mdash;for all the slow, sleepy,
+sluggish-brained sloths staid at home&mdash;you never find that sort
+of people among pioneers&mdash;you cannot build pioneers out of that
+sort of material. It was that population that gave to California
+a name for getting up astounding enterprises and rushing them
+through with a magnificent dash and daring and a recklessness of
+cost or consequences, which she bears unto this day&mdash;and when she
+projects a new surprise, the grave world smiles as usual, and
+says "Well, that is California all over."</p>
+
+<p>But they were rough in those times! They fairly reveled in
+gold, whisky, fights, and fandangoes, and were unspeakably happy.
+The honest miner raked from a hundred to a thousand dollars out
+of his claim a day, and what with the gambling dens and the other
+entertainments, he hadn't a cent the next morning, if he had any
+sort of luck. They cooked their own bacon and beans, sewed on
+their own buttons, washed their own shirts&mdash;blue woollen ones;
+and if a man wanted a fight on his hands without any annoying
+delay, all he had to do was to appear in public in a white shirt
+or a stove-pipe hat, and he would be accommodated. For those
+people hated aristocrats. They had a particular and malignant
+animosity toward what they called a "biled shirt."</p>
+
+<p>It was a wild, free, disorderly, grotesque society! Men&mdash;only
+swarming hosts of stalwart men&mdash;nothing juvenile, nothing
+feminine, visible anywhere!</p>
+
+<p>In those days miners would flock in crowds to catch a glimpse
+of that rare and blessed spectacle, a woman! Old inhabitants tell
+how, in a certain camp, the news went abroad early in the morning
+that a woman was come! They had seen a calico dress hanging out
+of a wagon down at the camping-ground&mdash;sign of emigrants from
+over the great plains. Everybody went down there, and a shout
+went up when an actual, bona fide dress was discovered fluttering
+in the wind! The male emigrant was visible. The miners said:</p>
+
+<p>"Fetch her out!"</p>
+
+<p>He said: "It is my wife, gentlemen&mdash;she is sick&mdash;we have been
+robbed of money, provisions, everything, by the Indians&mdash;we want
+to rest."</p>
+
+<p>"Fetch her out! We've got to see her!"</p>
+
+<p>"But, gentlemen, the poor thing, she&mdash;"</p>
+
+<p>"FETCH HER OUT!"</p>
+
+<a name="416"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="416.jpg (87K)" src="images/416.jpg" height="487" width="592">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>He "fetched her out," and they swung their hats and sent up
+three rousing cheers and a tiger; and they crowded around and
+gazed at her, and touched her dress, and listened to her voice
+with the look of men who listened to a memory rather than a
+present reality&mdash;and then they collected twenty- five hundred
+dollars in gold and gave it to the man, and swung their hats
+again and gave three more cheers, and went home satisfied.</p>
+
+<p>Once I dined in San Francisco with the family of a pioneer,
+and talked with his daughter, a young lady whose first experience
+in San Francisco was an adventure, though she herself did not
+remember it, as she was only two or three years old at the time.
+Her father said that, after landing from the ship, they were
+walking up the street, a servant leading the party with the
+little girl in her arms. And presently a huge miner, bearded,
+belted, spurred, and bristling with deadly weapons&mdash;just down
+from a long campaign in the mountains, evidently-barred the way,
+stopped the servant, and stood gazing, with a face all alive with
+gratification and astonishment. Then he said, reverently:</p>
+
+<a name="417"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="417.jpg (58K)" src="images/417.jpg" height="460" width="447">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>"Well, if it ain't a child!" And then he snatched a little
+leather sack out of his pocket and said to the servant:</p>
+
+<p>"There's a hundred and fifty dollars in dust, there, and I'll
+give it to you to let me kiss the child!"</p>
+
+<p>That anecdote is true.</p>
+
+<p>But see how things change. Sitting at that dinner-table,
+listening to that anecdote, if I had offered double the money for
+the privilege of kissing the same child, I would have been
+refused. Seventeen added years have far more than doubled the
+price.</p>
+
+<p>And while upon this subject I will remark that once in Star
+City, in the Humboldt Mountains, I took my place in a sort of
+long, post-office single file of miners, to patiently await my
+chance to peep through a crack in the cabin and get a sight of
+the splendid new sensation&mdash;a genuine, live Woman! And at the end
+of half of an hour my turn came, and I put my eye to the crack,
+and there she was, with one arm akimbo, and tossing flap- jacks
+in a frying-pan with the other.</p>
+
+<p>And she was one hundred and sixty-five [Being in calmer mood,
+now, I voluntarily knock off a hundred from that.&mdash;M.T.] years
+old, and hadn't a tooth in her head.</p>
+
+<a name="418"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="418.jpg (28K)" src="images/418.jpg" height="219" width="492">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+
+
+<br><br>
+<a name="ch58"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<h2>CHAPTER LVIII.</h2>
+</center>
+<br>
+
+
+
+<p>For a few months I enjoyed what to me was an entirely new
+phase of existence&mdash;a butterfly idleness; nothing to do, nobody
+to be responsible to, and untroubled with financial uneasiness. I
+fell in love with the most cordial and sociable city in the
+Union. After the sage-brush and alkali deserts of Washoe, San
+Francisco was Paradise to me. I lived at the best hotel,
+exhibited my clothes in the most conspicuous places, infested the
+opera, and learned to seem enraptured with music which oftener
+afflicted my ignorant ear than enchanted it, if I had had the
+vulgar honesty to confess it. However, I suppose I was not
+greatly worse than the most of my countrymen in that. I had
+longed to be a butterfly, and I was one at last. I attended
+private parties in sumptuous evening dress, simpered and aired my
+graces like a born beau, and polkad and schottisched with a step
+peculiar to myself&mdash;and the kangaroo. In a word, I kept the due
+state of a man worth a hundred thousand dollars (prospectively,)
+and likely to reach absolute affluence when that silver- mine
+sale should be ultimately achieved in the East. I spent money
+with a free hand, and meantime watched the stock sales with an
+interested eye and looked to see what might happen in Nevada.</p>
+
+<a name="420"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="420.jpg (49K)" src="images/420.jpg" height="464" width="402">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>Something very important happened. The property holders of
+Nevada voted against the State Constitution; but the folks who
+had nothing to lose were in the majority, and carried the measure
+over their heads. But after all it did not immediately look like
+a disaster, though unquestionably it was one I hesitated,
+calculated the chances, and then concluded not to sell. Stocks
+went on rising; speculation went mad; bankers, merchants,
+lawyers, doctors, mechanics, laborers, even the very washerwomen
+and servant girls, were putting up their earnings on silver
+stocks, and every sun that rose in the morning went down on
+paupers enriched and rich men beggared. What a gambling carnival
+it was! Gould and Curry soared to six thousand three hundred
+dollars a foot! And then&mdash;all of a sudden, out went the bottom
+and everything and everybody went to ruin and destruction! The
+wreck was complete.</p>
+
+<p>The bubble scarcely left a microscopic moisture behind it. I
+was an early beggar and a thorough one. My hoarded stocks were
+not worth the paper they were printed on. I threw them all away.
+I, the cheerful idiot that had been squandering money like water,
+and thought myself beyond the reach of misfortune, had not now as
+much as fifty dollars when I gathered together my various debts
+and paid them. I removed from the hotel to a very private
+boarding house. I took a reporter's berth and went to work. I was
+not entirely broken in spirit, for I was building confidently on
+the sale of the silver mine in the east. But I could not hear
+from Dan. My letters miscarried or were not answered.</p>
+
+<p>One day I did not feel vigorous and remained away from the
+office. The next day I went down toward noon as usual, and found
+a note on my desk which had been there twenty-four hours. It was
+signed "Marshall"&mdash;the Virginia reporter&mdash;and contained a request
+that I should call at the hotel and see him and a friend or two
+that night, as they would sail for the east in the morning. A
+postscript added that their errand was a big mining speculation!
+I was hardly ever so sick in my life. I abused myself for leaving
+Virginia and entrusting to another man a matter I ought to have
+attended to myself; I abused myself for remaining away from the
+office on the one day of all the year that I should have been
+there. And thus berating myself I trotted a mile to the steamer
+wharf and arrived just in time to be too late. The ship was in
+the stream and under way.</p>
+
+<a name="421"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="421.jpg (20K)" src="images/421.jpg" height="433" width="235">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>I comforted myself with the thought that may be the
+speculation would amount to nothing&mdash;poor comfort at best&mdash;and
+then went back to my slavery, resolved to put up with my
+thirty-five dollars a week and forget all about it.</p>
+
+<p>A month afterward I enjoyed my first earthquake. It was one
+which was long called the "great" earthquake, and is doubtless so
+distinguished till this day. It was just after noon, on a bright
+October day. I was coming down Third street. The only objects in
+motion anywhere in sight in that thickly built and populous
+quarter, were a man in a buggy behind me, and a street car
+wending slowly up the cross street. Otherwise, all was solitude
+and a Sabbath stillness. As I turned the corner, around a frame
+house, there was a great rattle and jar, and it occurred to me
+that here was an item!&mdash;no doubt a fight in that house. Before I
+could turn and seek the door, there came a really terrific shock;
+the ground seemed to roll under me in waves, interrupted by a
+violent joggling up and down, and there was a heavy grinding
+noise as of brick houses rubbing together. I fell up against the
+frame house and hurt my elbow. I knew what it was, now, and from
+mere reportorial instinct, nothing else, took out my watch and
+noted the time of day; at that moment a third and still severer
+shock came, and as I reeled about on the pavement trying to keep
+my footing, I saw a sight! The entire front of a tall four-story
+brick building in Third street sprung outward like a door and
+fell sprawling across the street, raising a dust like a great
+volume of smoke! And here came the buggy&mdash;overboard went the man,
+and in less time than I can tell it the vehicle was distributed
+in small fragments along three hundred yards of street.</p>
+
+<a name="422"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="422.jpg (87K)" src="images/422.jpg" height="485" width="583">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>One could have fancied that somebody had fired a charge of
+chair-rounds and rags down the thoroughfare. The street car had
+stopped, the horses were rearing and plunging, the passengers
+were pouring out at both ends, and one fat man had crashed half
+way through a glass window on one side of the car, got wedged
+fast and was squirming and screaming like an impaled madman.
+Every door, of every house, as far as the eye could reach, was
+vomiting a stream of human beings; and almost before one could
+execute a wink and begin another, there was a massed multitude of
+people stretching in endless procession down every street my
+position commanded. Never was solemn solitude turned into teeming
+life quicker.</p>
+
+<a name="423a"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="423a.jpg (38K)" src="images/423a.jpg" height="400" width="341">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>Of the wonders wrought by "the great earthquake," these were
+all that came under my eye; but the tricks it did, elsewhere, and
+far and wide over the town, made toothsome gossip for nine
+days.</p>
+
+<p>The destruction of property was trifling&mdash;the injury to it was
+wide- spread and somewhat serious.</p>
+
+<a name="423b"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="423b.jpg (37K)" src="images/423b.jpg" height="409" width="312">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>The "curiosities" of the earthquake were simply endless.
+Gentlemen and ladies who were sick, or were taking a siesta, or
+had dissipated till a late hour and were making up lost sleep,
+thronged into the public streets in all sorts of queer apparel,
+and some without any at all. One woman who had been washing a
+naked child, ran down the street holding it by the ankles as if
+it were a dressed turkey. Prominent citizens who were supposed to
+keep the Sabbath strictly, rushed out of saloons in their
+shirt-sleeves, with billiard cues in their hands. Dozens of men
+with necks swathed in napkins, rushed from barber-shops, lathered
+to the eyes or with one cheek clean shaved and the other still
+bearing a hairy stubble. Horses broke from stables, and a
+frightened dog rushed up a short attic ladder and out on to a
+roof, and when his scare was over had not the nerve to go down
+again the same way he had gone up.</p>
+
+<p>A prominent editor flew down stairs, in the principal hotel,
+with nothing on but one brief undergarment&mdash;met a chambermaid,
+and exclaimed:</p>
+
+<p>"Oh, what shall I do! Where shall I go!"</p>
+
+<p>She responded with naive serenity:</p>
+
+<p>"If you have no choice, you might try a clothing-store!"</p>
+
+<a name="424"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="424.jpg (63K)" src="images/424.jpg" height="483" width="408">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>A certain foreign consul's lady was the acknowledged leader of
+fashion, and every time she appeared in anything new or
+extraordinary, the ladies in the vicinity made a raid on their
+husbands' purses and arrayed themselves similarly. One man who
+had suffered considerably and growled accordingly, was standing
+at the window when the shocks came, and the next instant the
+consul's wife, just out of the bath, fled by with no other
+apology for clothing than&mdash;a bath-towel! The sufferer rose
+superior to the terrors of the earthquake, and said to his
+wife:</p>
+
+<p>"Now that is something like! Get out your towel my dear!"</p>
+
+
+
+<a name="425"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="425 (40K)" src="images/425.jpg" height="416" width="306">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+
+<p>The plastering that fell from ceilings in San Francisco that
+day, would have covered several acres of ground. For some days
+afterward, groups of eyeing and pointing men stood about many a
+building, looking at long zig- zag cracks that extended from the
+eaves to the ground. Four feet of the tops of three chimneys on
+one house were broken square off and turned around in such a way
+as to completely stop the draft.</p>
+
+<p>A crack a hundred feet long gaped open six inches wide in the
+middle of one street and then shut together again with such
+force, as to ridge up the meeting earth like a slender grave. A
+lady sitting in her rocking and quaking parlor, saw the wall part
+at the ceiling, open and shut twice, like a mouth, and then-drop
+the end of a brick on the floor like a tooth. She was a woman
+easily disgusted with foolishness, and she arose and went out of
+there. One lady who was coming down stairs was astonished to see
+a bronze Hercules lean forward on its pedestal as if to strike
+her with its club. They both reached the bottom of the flight at
+the same time,&mdash;the woman insensible from the fright. Her child,
+born some little time afterward, was club-footed. However&mdash;on
+second thought,&mdash;if the reader sees any coincidence in this, he
+must do it at his own risk.</p>
+
+<p>The first shock brought down two or three huge organ-pipes in
+one of the churches. The minister, with uplifted hands, was just
+closing the services. He glanced up, hesitated, and said:</p>
+
+<p>"However, we will omit the benediction!"&mdash;and the next instant
+there was a vacancy in the atmosphere where he had stood.</p>
+
+<p>After the first shock, an Oakland minister said:</p>
+
+<p>"Keep your seats! There is no better place to die than
+this"&mdash;</p>
+
+<p>And added, after the third:</p>
+
+<p>"But outside is good enough!" He then skipped out at the back
+door.</p>
+
+<a name="426"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="426.jpg (40K)" src="images/426.jpg" height="413" width="321">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>Such another destruction of mantel ornaments and toilet
+bottles as the earthquake created, San Francisco never saw
+before. There was hardly a girl or a matron in the city but
+suffered losses of this kind. Suspended pictures were thrown
+down, but oftener still, by a curious freak of the earthquake's
+humor, they were whirled completely around with their faces to
+the wall! There was great difference of opinion, at first, as to
+the course or direction the earthquake traveled, but water that
+splashed out of various tanks and buckets settled that. Thousands
+of people were made so sea-sick by the rolling and pitching of
+floors and streets that they were weak and bed-ridden for hours,
+and some few for even days afterward.&mdash;Hardly an individual
+escaped nausea entirely.</p>
+
+<p>The queer earthquake&mdash;episodes that formed the staple of San
+Francisco gossip for the next week would fill a much larger book
+than this, and so I will diverge from the subject.</p>
+
+<p>By and by, in the due course of things, I picked up a copy of
+the Enterprise one day, and fell under this cruel blow:</p>
+
+<blockquote><blockquote>
+<p>NEVADA MINES IN NEW YORK.&mdash;G. M. Marshall, Sheba Hurs and Amos
+H. Rose, who left San Francisco last July for New York City, with
+ores from mines in Pine Wood District, Humboldt County, and on
+the Reese River range, have disposed of a mine containing six
+thousand feet and called the Pine Mountains Consolidated, for the
+sum of $3,000,000. The stamps on the deed, which is now on its
+way to Humboldt County, from New York, for record, amounted to
+$3,000, which is said to be the largest amount of stamps ever
+placed on one document. A working capital of $1,000,000 has been
+paid into the treasury, and machinery has already been purchased
+for a large quartz mill, which will be put up as soon as
+possible. The stock in this company is all full paid and entirely
+unassessable. The ores of the mines in this district somewhat
+resemble those of the Sheba mine in Humboldt. Sheba Hurst, the
+discoverer of the mines, with his friends corralled all the best
+leads and all the land and timber they desired before making
+public their whereabouts. Ores from there, assayed in this city,
+showed them to be exceedingly rich in silver and gold&mdash;silver
+predominating. There is an abundance of wood and water in the
+District. We are glad to know that New York capital has been
+enlisted in the development of the mines of this region. Having
+seen the ores and assays, we are satisfied that the mines of the
+District are very valuable&mdash;anything but wild-cat.</p>
+</blockquote></blockquote>
+
+<p>Once more native imbecility had carried the day, and I had
+lost a million! It was the "blind lead" over again.</p>
+
+<p>Let us not dwell on this miserable matter. If I were inventing
+these things, I could be wonderfully humorous over them; but they
+are too true to be talked of with hearty levity, even at this
+distant day. [True, and yet not exactly as given in the above
+figures, possibly. I saw Marshall, months afterward, and although
+he had plenty of money he did not claim to have captured an
+entire million. In fact I gathered that he had not then received
+$50,000. Beyond that figure his fortune appeared to consist of
+uncertain vast expectations rather than prodigious certainties.
+However, when the above item appeared in print I put full faith
+in it, and incontinently wilted and went to seed under it.]
+Suffice it that I so lost heart, and so yielded myself up to
+repinings and sighings and foolish regrets, that I neglected my
+duties and became about worthless, as a reporter for a brisk
+newspaper. And at last one of the proprietors took me aside, with
+a charity I still remember with considerable respect, and gave me
+an opportunity to resign my berth and so save myself the disgrace
+of a dismissal.</p>
+
+
+
+<br><br>
+<a name="ch59"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<h2>CHAPTER LIX.</h2>
+</center>
+<br>
+
+
+
+<p>For a time I wrote literary screeds for the Golden Era. C. H.
+Webb had established a very excellent literary weekly called the
+Californian, but high merit was no guaranty of success; it
+languished, and he sold out to three printers, and Bret Harte
+became editor at $20 a week, and I was employed to contribute an
+article a week at $12. But the journal still languished, and the
+printers sold out to Captain Ogden, a rich man and a pleasant
+gentleman who chose to amuse himself with such an expensive
+luxury without much caring about the cost of it. When he grew
+tired of the novelty, he re-sold to the printers, the paper
+presently died a peaceful death, and I was out of work again. I
+would not mention these things but for the fact that they so
+aptly illustrate the ups and downs that characterize life on the
+Pacific coast. A man could hardly stumble into such a variety of
+queer vicissitudes in any other country.</p>
+
+<p>For two months my sole occupation was avoiding acquaintances;
+for during that time I did not earn a penny, or buy an article of
+any kind, or pay my board. I became a very adept at "slinking." I
+slunk from back street to back street, I slunk away from
+approaching faces that looked familiar, I slunk to my meals, ate
+them humbly and with a mute apology for every mouthful I robbed
+my generous landlady of, and at midnight, after wanderings that
+were but slinkings away from cheerfulness and light, I slunk to
+my bed. I felt meaner, and lowlier and more despicable than the
+worms. During all this time I had but one piece of money&mdash;a
+silver ten cent piece&mdash;and I held to it and would not spend it on
+any account, lest the consciousness coming strong upon me that I
+was entirely penniless, might suggest suicide. I had pawned every
+thing but the clothes I had on; so I clung to my dime
+desperately, till it was smooth with handling.</p>
+
+<a name="429"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="429.jpg (36K)" src="images/429.jpg" height="446" width="269">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>However, I am forgetting. I did have one other occupation
+beside that of "slinking." It was the entertaining of a collector
+(and being entertained by him,) who had in his hands the Virginia
+banker's bill for forty-six dollars which I had loaned my
+schoolmate, the "Prodigal." This man used to call regularly once
+a week and dun me, and sometimes oftener. He did it from sheer
+force of habit, for he knew he could get nothing. He would get
+out his bill, calculate the interest for me, at five per cent a
+month, and show me clearly that there was no attempt at fraud in
+it and no mistakes; and then plead, and argue and dun with all
+his might for any sum&mdash;any little trifle&mdash;even a dollar&mdash;even
+half a dollar, on account. Then his duty was accomplished and his
+conscience free. He immediately dropped the subject there always;
+got out a couple of cigars and divided, put his feet in the
+window, and then we would have a long, luxurious talk about
+everything and everybody, and he would furnish me a world of
+curious dunning adventures out of the ample store in his memory.
+By and by he would clap his hat on his head, shake hands and say
+briskly:</p>
+
+<p>"Well, business is business&mdash;can't stay with you always!"&mdash;and
+was off in a second.</p>
+
+<p>The idea of pining for a dun! And yet I used to long for him
+to come, and would get as uneasy as any mother if the day went by
+without his visit, when I was expecting him. But he never
+collected that bill, at last nor any part of it. I lived to pay
+it to the banker myself.</p>
+
+<p>Misery loves company. Now and then at night, in out-of-the
+way, dimly lighted places, I found myself happening on another
+child of misfortune. He looked so seedy and forlorn, so homeless
+and friendless and forsaken, that I yearned toward him as a
+brother. I wanted to claim kinship with him and go about and
+enjoy our wretchedness together. The drawing toward each other
+must have been mutual; at any rate we got to falling together
+oftener, though still seemingly by accident; and although we did
+not speak or evince any recognition, I think the dull anxiety
+passed out of both of us when we saw each other, and then for
+several hours we would idle along contentedly, wide apart, and
+glancing furtively in at home lights and fireside gatherings, out
+of the night shadows, and very much enjoying our dumb
+companionship.</p>
+
+<p>Finally we spoke, and were inseparable after that. For our
+woes were identical, almost. He had been a reporter too, and lost
+his berth, and this was his experience, as nearly as I can
+recollect it. After losing his berth he had gone down, down,
+down, with never a halt: from a boarding house on Russian Hill to
+a boarding house in Kearney street; from thence to Dupont; from
+thence to a low sailor den; and from thence to lodgings in goods
+boxes and empty hogsheads near the wharves. Then; for a while, he
+had gained a meagre living by sewing up bursted sacks of grain on
+the piers; when that failed he had found food here and there as
+chance threw it in his way. He had ceased to show his face in
+daylight, now, for a reporter knows everybody, rich and poor,
+high and low, and cannot well avoid familiar faces in the broad
+light of day.</p>
+
+<p>This mendicant Blucher&mdash;I call him that for convenience&mdash;was a
+splendid creature. He was full of hope, pluck and philosophy; he
+was well read and a man of cultivated taste; he had a bright wit
+and was a master of satire; his kindliness and his generous
+spirit made him royal in my eyes and changed his curb-stone seat
+to a throne and his damaged hat to a crown.</p>
+
+<p>He had an adventure, once, which sticks fast in my memory as
+the most pleasantly grotesque that ever touched my sympathies. He
+had been without a penny for two months. He had shirked about
+obscure streets, among friendly dim lights, till the thing had
+become second nature to him. But at last he was driven abroad in
+daylight. The cause was sufficient; he had not tasted food for
+forty-eight hours, and he could not endure the misery of his
+hunger in idle hiding. He came along a back street, glowering at
+the loaves in bake-shop windows, and feeling that he could trade
+his life away for a morsel to eat. The sight of the bread doubled
+his hunger; but it was good to look at it, any how, and imagine
+what one might do if one only had it.</p>
+
+<p>Presently, in the middle of the street he saw a shining
+spot&mdash;looked again&mdash;did not, and could not, believe his
+eyes&mdash;turned away, to try them, then looked again. It was a
+verity&mdash;no vain, hunger-inspired delusion&mdash;it was a silver
+dime!</p>
+
+<a name="431"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="431.jpg (31K)" src="images/431.jpg" height="435" width="279">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>He snatched it&mdash;gloated over it; doubted it&mdash;bit it&mdash;found it
+genuine&mdash;choked his heart down, and smothered a halleluiah. Then
+he looked around&mdash;saw that nobody was looking at him&mdash;threw the
+dime down where it was before&mdash;walked away a few steps, and
+approached again, pretending he did not know it was there, so
+that he could re-enjoy the luxury of finding it. He walked around
+it, viewing it from different points; then sauntered about with
+his hands in his pockets, looking up at the signs and now and
+then glancing at it and feeling the old thrill again. Finally he
+took it up, and went away, fondling it in his pocket. He idled
+through unfrequented streets, stopping in doorways and corners to
+take it out and look at it. By and by he went home to his
+lodgings&mdash;an empty queens-ware hogshead,&mdash;and employed himself
+till night trying to make up his mind what to buy with it. But it
+was hard to do. To get the most for it was the idea. He knew that
+at the Miner's Restaurant he could get a plate of beans and a
+piece of bread for ten cents; or a fish- ball and some few
+trifles, but they gave "no bread with one fish-ball" there. At
+French Pete's he could get a veal cutlet, plain, and some
+radishes and bread, for ten cents; or a cup of coffee&mdash;a pint at
+least&mdash;and a slice of bread; but the slice was not thick enough
+by the eighth of an inch, and sometimes they were still more
+criminal than that in the cutting of it. At seven o'clock his
+hunger was wolfish; and still his mind was not made up. He turned
+out and went up Merchant street, still ciphering; and chewing a
+bit of stick, as is the way of starving men.</p>
+
+<a name="432"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="432.jpg (38K)" src="images/432.jpg" height="449" width="264">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>He passed before the lights of Martin's restaurant, the most
+aristocratic in the city, and stopped. It was a place where he
+had often dined, in better days, and Martin knew him well.
+Standing aside, just out of the range of the light, he worshiped
+the quails and steaks in the show window, and imagined that may
+be the fairy times were not gone yet and some prince in disguise
+would come along presently and tell him to go in there and take
+whatever he wanted. He chewed his stick with a hungry interest as
+he warmed to his subject. Just at this juncture he was conscious
+of some one at his side, sure enough; and then a finger touched
+his arm. He looked up, over his shoulder, and saw an
+apparition&mdash;a very allegory of Hunger! It was a man six feet
+high, gaunt, unshaven, hung with rags; with a haggard face and
+sunken cheeks, and eyes that pleaded piteously. This phantom
+said:</p>
+
+<p>"Come with me&mdash;please."</p>
+
+<p>He locked his arm in Blucher's and walked up the street to
+where the passengers were few and the light not strong, and then
+facing about, put out his hands in a beseeching way, and
+said:</p>
+
+<p>"Friend&mdash;stranger&mdash;look at me! Life is easy to you&mdash;you go
+about, placid and content, as I did once, in my day&mdash;you have
+been in there, and eaten your sumptuous supper, and picked your
+teeth, and hummed your tune, and thought your pleasant thoughts,
+and said to yourself it is a good world&mdash;but you've never
+suffered! You don't know what trouble is&mdash;you don't know what
+misery is&mdash;nor hunger! Look at me! Stranger have pity on a poor
+friendless, homeless dog! As God is my judge, I have not tasted
+food for eight and forty hours!&mdash;look in my eyes and see if I
+lie! Give me the least trifle in the world to keep me from
+starving&mdash;anything&mdash;twenty-five cents! Do it, stranger&mdash;do it,
+please. It will be nothing to you, but life to me. Do it, and I
+will go down on my knees and lick the dust before you! I will
+kiss your footprints&mdash;I will worship the very ground you walk on!
+Only twenty-five cents! I am famishing&mdash;perishing&mdash;starving by
+inches! For God's sake don't desert me!"</p>
+
+<a name="433"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="433.jpg (71K)" src="images/433.jpg" height="603" width="411">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>Blucher was bewildered&mdash;and touched, too&mdash;stirred to the
+depths. He reflected. Thought again. Then an idea struck him, and
+he said:</p>
+
+<p>"Come with me."</p>
+
+<p>He took the outcast's arm, walked him down to Martin's
+restaurant, seated him at a marble table, placed the bill of fare
+before him, and said:</p>
+
+<p>"Order what you want, friend. Charge it to me, Mr.
+Martin."</p>
+
+<p>"All right, Mr. Blucher," said Martin.</p>
+
+<p>Then Blucher stepped back and leaned against the counter and
+watched the man stow away cargo after cargo of buckwheat cakes at
+seventy-five cents a plate; cup after cup of coffee, and porter
+house steaks worth two dollars apiece; and when six dollars and a
+half's worth of destruction had been accomplished, and the
+stranger's hunger appeased, Blucher went down to French Pete's,
+bought a veal cutlet plain, a slice of bread, and three radishes,
+with his dime, and set to and feasted like a king!</p>
+
+<p>Take the episode all around, it was as odd as any that can be
+culled from the myriad curiosities of Californian life,
+perhaps.</p>
+
+
+
+<br><br>
+<a name="ch60"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<h2>CHAPTER LX.</h2>
+</center>
+<br>
+
+
+
+<p>By and by, an old friend of mine, a miner, came down from one
+of the decayed mining camps of Tuolumne, California, and I went
+back with him. We lived in a small cabin on a verdant hillside,
+and there were not five other cabins in view over the wide
+expanse of hill and forest. Yet a flourishing city of two or
+three thousand population had occupied this grassy dead solitude
+during the flush times of twelve or fifteen years before, and
+where our cabin stood had once been the heart of the teeming
+hive, the centre of the city. When the mines gave out the town
+fell into decay, and in a few years wholly disappeared&mdash;streets,
+dwellings, shops, everything&mdash;and left no sign. The grassy slopes
+were as green and smooth and desolate of life as if they had
+never been disturbed. The mere handful of miners still remaining,
+had seen the town spring up spread, grow and flourish in its
+pride; and they had seen it sicken and die, and pass away like a
+dream. With it their hopes had died, and their zest of life. They
+had long ago resigned themselves to their exile, and ceased to
+correspond with their distant friends or turn longing eyes toward
+their early homes. They had accepted banishment, forgotten the
+world and been forgotten of the world. They were far from
+telegraphs and railroads, and they stood, as it were, in a living
+grave, dead to the events that stirred the globe's great
+populations, dead to the common interests of men, isolated and
+outcast from brotherhood with their kind. It was the most
+singular, and almost the most touching and melancholy exile that
+fancy can imagine.&mdash;One of my associates in this locality, for
+two or three months, was a man who had had a university
+education; but now for eighteen years he had decayed there by
+inches, a bearded, rough- clad, clay-stained miner, and at times,
+among his sighings and soliloquizings, he unconsciously
+interjected vaguely remembered Latin and Greek sentences&mdash;dead
+and musty tongues, meet vehicles for the thoughts of one whose
+dreams were all of the past, whose life was a failure; a tired
+man, burdened with the present, and indifferent to the future; a
+man without ties, hopes, interests, waiting for rest and the
+end.</p>
+
+<a name="436"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="436.jpg (34K)" src="images/436.jpg" height="446" width="277">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>In that one little corner of California is found a species of
+mining which is seldom or never mentioned in print. It is called
+"pocket mining" and I am not aware that any of it is done outside
+of that little corner. The gold is not evenly distributed through
+the surface dirt, as in ordinary placer mines, but is collected
+in little spots, and they are very wide apart and exceedingly
+hard to find, but when you do find one you reap a rich and sudden
+harvest. There are not now more than twenty pocket miners in that
+entire little region. I think I know every one of them
+personally. I have known one of them to hunt patiently about the
+hill-sides every day for eight months without finding gold enough
+to make a snuff-box&mdash;his grocery bill running up relentlessly all
+the time&mdash;and then find a pocket and take out of it two thousand
+dollars in two dips of his shovel. I have known him to take out
+three thousand dollars in two hours, and go and pay up every cent
+of his indebtedness, then enter on a dazzling spree that finished
+the last of his treasure before the night was gone. And the next
+day he bought his groceries on credit as usual, and shouldered
+his pan and shovel and went off to the hills hunting pockets
+again happy and content. This is the most fascinating of all the
+different kinds of mining, and furnishes a very handsome
+percentage of victims to the lunatic asylum.</p>
+
+<p>Pocket hunting is an ingenious process. You take a spadeful of
+earth from the hill-side and put it in a large tin pan and
+dissolve and wash it gradually away till nothing is left but a
+teaspoonful of fine sediment. Whatever gold was in that earth has
+remained, because, being the heaviest, it has sought the bottom.
+Among the sediment you will find half a dozen yellow particles no
+larger than pin-heads. You are delighted. You move off to one
+side and wash another pan. If you find gold again, you move to
+one side further, and wash a third pan. If you find no gold this
+time, you are delighted again, because you know you are on the
+right scent.</p>
+
+<p>You lay an imaginary plan, shaped like a fan, with its handle
+up the hill&mdash;for just where the end of the handle is, you argue
+that the rich deposit lies hidden, whose vagrant grains of gold
+have escaped and been washed down the hill, spreading farther and
+farther apart as they wandered. And so you proceed up the hill,
+washing the earth and narrowing your lines every time the absence
+of gold in the pan shows that you are outside the spread of the
+fan; and at last, twenty yards up the hill your lines have
+converged to a point&mdash;a single foot from that point you cannot
+find any gold. Your breath comes short and quick, you are
+feverish with excitement; the dinner-bell may ring its clapper
+off, you pay no attention; friends may die, weddings transpire,
+houses burn down, they are nothing to you; you sweat and dig and
+delve with a frantic interest&mdash;and all at once you strike it! Up
+comes a spadeful of earth and quartz that is all lovely with
+soiled lumps and leaves and sprays of gold. Sometimes that one
+spadeful is all&mdash;$500. Sometimes the nest contains $10,000, and
+it takes you three or four days to get it all out. The
+pocket-miners tell of one nest that yielded $60,000 and two men
+exhausted it in two weeks, and then sold the ground for $10,000
+to a party who never got $300 out of it afterward.</p>
+
+<a name="437"></a>
+<br><br>
+<center>
+<img alt="437.jpg (37K)" src="images/437.jpg" height="466" width="294">
+</center>
+<br><br>
+
+<p>The hogs are good pocket hunters. All the summer they root
+around the bushes, and turn up a thousand little piles of dirt,
+and then the miners long for the rains; for the rains beat upon
+these little piles and wash them down and expose the gold,
+possibly right over a pocket. Two pockets were found in this way
+by the same man in one day. One had $5,000 in it and the other
+$8,000. That man could appreciate it, for he hadn't had a cent
+for about a year.</p>
+
+<p>In Tuolumne lived two miners who used to go to the neighboring
+village in the afternoon and return every night with household
+supplies. Part of the distance they traversed a trail, and nearly
+always sat down to rest on a great boulder that lay beside the
+path. In the course of thirteen years they had worn that boulder
+tolerably smooth, sitting on it. By and by two vagrant Mexicans
+came along and occupied the seat. They began to amuse themselves
+by chipping off flakes from the boulder with a sledge- hammer.
+They examined one of these flakes and found it rich with gold.
+That boulder paid them $800 afterward. But the aggravating
+circumstance was that these "Greasers" knew that there must be
+more gold where that boulder came from, and so they went panning
+up the hill and found what was probably the richest pocket that
+region has yet produced. It took three months to exhaust it, and
+it yielded $120,000. The two American miners who used to sit on
+the boulder are poor yet, and they take turn about in getting up
+early in the morning to curse those Mexicans&mdash;and when it comes
+down to pure ornamental cursing, the native American is gifted
+above the sons of men.</p>
+
+<p>I have dwelt at some length upon this matter of pocket mining
+because it is a subject that is seldom referred to in print, and
+therefore I judged that it would have for the reader that
+interest which naturally attaches to novelty.</p>
+
+
+
+
+
+<br>
+<br>
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+<pre>
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Roughing It, Part 6.
+by Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens)
+
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+</body>
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+Project Gutenberg's Roughing It, Part 6., by Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens)
+
+This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with
+almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or
+re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included
+with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org
+
+
+Title: Roughing It, Part 6.
+
+Author: Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens)
+
+Release Date: July 2, 2004 [EBook #8587]
+
+Language: English
+
+Character set encoding: ASCII
+
+*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ROUGHING IT, PART 6. ***
+
+
+
+
+Produced by David Widger
+
+
+
+
+
+ ROUGHING IT
+
+ by Mark Twain
+
+ 1880
+
+ Part 6.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LI.
+
+Vice flourished luxuriantly during the hey-day of our "flush times." The
+saloons were overburdened with custom; so were the police courts, the
+gambling dens, the brothels and the jails--unfailing signs of high
+prosperity in a mining region--in any region for that matter. Is it not
+so? A crowded police court docket is the surest of all signs that trade
+is brisk and money plenty. Still, there is one other sign; it comes
+last, but when it does come it establishes beyond cavil that the "flush
+times" are at the flood. This is the birth of the "literary" paper.
+The Weekly Occidental, "devoted to literature," made its appearance in
+Virginia. All the literary people were engaged to write for it. Mr. F.
+was to edit it. He was a felicitous skirmisher with a pen, and a man who
+could say happy things in a crisp, neat way. Once, while editor of the
+Union, he had disposed of a labored, incoherent, two-column attack made
+upon him by a contemporary, with a single line, which, at first glance,
+seemed to contain a solemn and tremendous compliment--viz.: "THE LOGIC OF
+OUR ADVERSARY RESEMBLES THE PEACE OF GOD,"--and left it to the reader's
+memory and after-thought to invest the remark with another and "more
+different" meaning by supplying for himself and at his own leisure the
+rest of the Scripture--"in that it passeth understanding." He once said
+of a little, half-starved, wayside community that had no subsistence
+except what they could get by preying upon chance passengers who stopped
+over with them a day when traveling by the overland stage, that in their
+Church service they had altered the Lord's Prayer to read: "Give us this
+day our daily stranger!"
+
+We expected great things of the Occidental. Of course it could not get
+along without an original novel, and so we made arrangements to hurl into
+the work the full strength of the company. Mrs. F. was an able romancist
+of the ineffable school--I know no other name to apply to a school whose
+heroes are all dainty and all perfect. She wrote the opening chapter,
+and introduced a lovely blonde simpleton who talked nothing but pearls
+and poetry and who was virtuous to the verge of eccentricity. She also
+introduced a young French Duke of aggravated refinement, in love with the
+blonde. Mr. F. followed next week, with a brilliant lawyer who set about
+getting the Duke's estates into trouble, and a sparkling young lady of
+high society who fell to fascinating the Duke and impairing the appetite
+of the blonde. Mr. D., a dark and bloody editor of one of the dailies,
+followed Mr. F., the third week, introducing a mysterious Roscicrucian
+who transmuted metals, held consultations with the devil in a cave at
+dead of night, and cast the horoscope of the several heroes and heroines
+in such a way as to provide plenty of trouble for their future careers
+and breed a solemn and awful public interest in the novel. He also
+introduced a cloaked and masked melodramatic miscreant, put him on a
+salary and set him on the midnight track of the Duke with a poisoned
+dagger. He also created an Irish coachman with a rich brogue and placed
+him in the service of the society-young-lady with an ulterior mission to
+carry billet-doux to the Duke.
+
+About this time there arrived in Virginia a dissolute stranger with a
+literary turn of mind--rather seedy he was, but very quiet and
+unassuming; almost diffident, indeed. He was so gentle, and his manners
+were so pleasing and kindly, whether he was sober or intoxicated, that he
+made friends of all who came in contact with him. He applied for
+literary work, offered conclusive evidence that he wielded an easy and
+practiced pen, and so Mr. F. engaged him at once to help write the novel.
+His chapter was to follow Mr. D.'s, and mine was to come next. Now what
+does this fellow do but go off and get drunk and then proceed to his
+quarters and set to work with his imagination in a state of chaos, and
+that chaos in a condition of extravagant activity. The result may be
+guessed. He scanned the chapters of his predecessors, found plenty of
+heroes and heroines already created, and was satisfied with them; he
+decided to introduce no more; with all the confidence that whisky
+inspires and all the easy complacency it gives to its servant, he then
+launched himself lovingly into his work: he married the coachman to the
+society-young-lady for the sake of the scandal; married the Duke to the
+blonde's stepmother, for the sake of the sensation; stopped the
+desperado's salary; created a misunderstanding between the devil and the
+Roscicrucian; threw the Duke's property into the wicked lawyer's hands;
+made the lawyer's upbraiding conscience drive him to drink, thence to
+delirium tremens, thence to suicide; broke the coachman's neck; let his
+widow succumb to contumely, neglect, poverty and consumption; caused the
+blonde to drown herself, leaving her clothes on the bank with the
+customary note pinned to them forgiving the Duke and hoping he would be
+happy; revealed to the Duke, by means of the usual strawberry mark on
+left arm, that he had married his own long-lost mother and destroyed his
+long-lost sister; instituted the proper and necessary suicide of the Duke
+and the Duchess in order to compass poetical justice; opened the earth
+and let the Roscicrucian through, accompanied with the accustomed smoke
+and thunder and smell of brimstone, and finished with the promise that in
+the next chapter, after holding a general inquest, he would take up the
+surviving character of the novel and tell what became of the devil!
+It read with singular smoothness, and with a "dead" earnestness that was
+funny enough to suffocate a body. But there was war when it came in.
+The other novelists were furious. The mild stranger, not yet more than
+half sober, stood there, under a scathing fire of vituperation, meek and
+bewildered, looking from one to another of his assailants, and wondering
+what he could have done to invoke such a storm. When a lull came at
+last, he said his say gently and appealingly--said he did not rightly
+remember what he had written, but was sure he had tried to do the best he
+could, and knew his object had been to make the novel not only pleasant
+and plausible but instructive and----
+
+The bombardment began again. The novelists assailed his ill-chosen
+adjectives and demolished them with a storm of denunciation and ridicule.
+And so the siege went on. Every time the stranger tried to appease the
+enemy he only made matters worse. Finally he offered to rewrite the
+chapter. This arrested hostilities. The indignation gradually quieted
+down, peace reigned again and the sufferer retired in safety and got him
+to his own citadel.
+
+But on the way thither the evil angel tempted him and he got drunk again.
+And again his imagination went mad. He led the heroes and heroines a
+wilder dance than ever; and yet all through it ran that same convincing
+air of honesty and earnestness that had marked his first work. He got
+the characters into the most extraordinary situations, put them through
+the most surprising performances, and made them talk the strangest talk!
+But the chapter cannot be described. It was symmetrically crazy; it was
+artistically absurd; and it had explanatory footnotes that were fully as
+curious as the text. I remember one of the "situations," and will offer
+it as an example of the whole. He altered the character of the brilliant
+lawyer, and made him a great-hearted, splendid fellow; gave him fame and
+riches, and set his age at thirty-three years. Then he made the blonde
+discover, through the help of the Roscicrucian and the melodramatic
+miscreant, that while the Duke loved her money ardently and wanted it, he
+secretly felt a sort of leaning toward the society-young-lady. Stung to
+the quick, she tore her affections from him and bestowed them with
+tenfold power upon the lawyer, who responded with consuming zeal. But
+the parents would none of it. What they wanted in the family was a Duke;
+and a Duke they were determined to have; though they confessed that next
+to the Duke the lawyer had their preference. Necessarily the blonde now
+went into a decline. The parents were alarmed. They pleaded with her to
+marry the Duke, but she steadfastly refused, and pined on. Then they
+laid a plan. They told her to wait a year and a day, and if at the end
+of that time she still felt that she could not marry the Duke, she might
+marry the lawyer with their full consent. The result was as they had
+foreseen: gladness came again, and the flush of returning health. Then
+the parents took the next step in their scheme. They had the family
+physician recommend a long sea voyage and much land travel for the
+thorough restoration of the blonde's strength; and they invited the Duke
+to be of the party. They judged that the Duke's constant presence and
+the lawyer's protracted absence would do the rest--for they did not
+invite the lawyer.
+
+So they set sail in a steamer for America--and the third day out, when
+their sea-sickness called truce and permitted them to take their first
+meal at the public table, behold there sat the lawyer! The Duke and
+party made the best of an awkward situation; the voyage progressed, and
+the vessel neared America.
+
+But, by and by, two hundred miles off New Bedford, the ship took fire;
+she burned to the water's edge; of all her crew and passengers, only
+thirty were saved. They floated about the sea half an afternoon and all
+night long. Among them were our friends. The lawyer, by superhuman
+exertions, had saved the blonde and her parents, swimming back and forth
+two hundred yards and bringing one each time--(the girl first). The Duke
+had saved himself. In the morning two whale ships arrived on the scene
+and sent their boats. The weather was stormy and the embarkation was
+attended with much confusion and excitement. The lawyer did his duty
+like a man; helped his exhausted and insensible blonde, her parents and
+some others into a boat (the Duke helped himself in); then a child fell
+overboard at the other end of the raft and the lawyer rushed thither and
+helped half a dozen people fish it out, under the stimulus of its
+mother's screams. Then he ran back--a few seconds too late--the blonde's
+boat was under way. So he had to take the other boat, and go to the
+other ship. The storm increased and drove the vessels out of sight of
+each other--drove them whither it would.
+
+When it calmed, at the end of three days, the blonde's ship was seven
+hundred miles north of Boston and the other about seven hundred south of
+that port. The blonde's captain was bound on a whaling cruise in the
+North Atlantic and could not go back such a distance or make a port
+without orders; such being nautical law. The lawyer's captain was to
+cruise in the North Pacific, and he could not go back or make a port
+without orders. All the lawyer's money and baggage were in the blonde's
+boat and went to the blonde's ship--so his captain made him work his
+passage as a common sailor. When both ships had been cruising nearly a
+year, the one was off the coast of Greenland and the other in Behring's
+Strait. The blonde had long ago been well-nigh persuaded that her lawyer
+had been washed overboard and lost just before the whale ships reached
+the raft, and now, under the pleadings of her parents and the Duke she
+was at last beginning to nerve herself for the doom of the covenant, and
+prepare for the hated marriage.
+
+But she would not yield a day before the date set. The weeks dragged on,
+the time narrowed, orders were given to deck the ship for the wedding--a
+wedding at sea among icebergs and walruses. Five days more and all would
+be over. So the blonde reflected, with a sigh and a tear. Oh where was
+her true love--and why, why did he not come and save her? At that moment
+he was lifting his harpoon to strike a whale in Behring's Strait, five
+thousand miles away, by the way of the Arctic Ocean, or twenty thousand
+by the way of the Horn--that was the reason. He struck, but not with
+perfect aim--his foot slipped and he fell in the whale's mouth and went
+down his throat. He was insensible five days. Then he came to himself
+and heard voices; daylight was streaming through a hole cut in the
+whale's roof. He climbed out and astonished the sailors who were
+hoisting blubber up a ship's side. He recognized the vessel, flew
+aboard, surprised the wedding party at the altar and exclaimed:
+
+"Stop the proceedings--I'm here! Come to my arms, my own!"
+
+There were foot-notes to this extravagant piece of literature wherein the
+author endeavored to show that the whole thing was within the
+possibilities; he said he got the incident of the whale traveling from
+Behring's Strait to the coast of Greenland, five thousand miles in five
+days, through the Arctic Ocean, from Charles Reade's "Love Me Little Love
+Me Long," and considered that that established the fact that the thing
+could be done; and he instanced Jonah's adventure as proof that a man
+could live in a whale's belly, and added that if a preacher could stand
+it three days a lawyer could surely stand it five!
+
+There was a fiercer storm than ever in the editorial sanctum now, and the
+stranger was peremptorily discharged, and his manuscript flung at his
+head. But he had already delayed things so much that there was not time
+for some one else to rewrite the chapter, and so the paper came out
+without any novel in it. It was but a feeble, struggling, stupid
+journal, and the absence of the novel probably shook public confidence;
+at any rate, before the first side of the next issue went to press, the
+Weekly Occidental died as peacefully as an infant.
+
+An effort was made to resurrect it, with the proposed advantage of a
+telling new title, and Mr. F. said that The Phenix would be just the name
+for it, because it would give the idea of a resurrection from its dead
+ashes in a new and undreamed of condition of splendor; but some
+low-priced smarty on one of the dailies suggested that we call it the
+Lazarus; and inasmuch as the people were not profound in Scriptural
+matters but thought the resurrected Lazarus and the dilapidated mendicant
+that begged in the rich man's gateway were one and the same person, the
+name became the laughing stock of the town, and killed the paper for good
+and all.
+
+I was sorry enough, for I was very proud of being connected with a
+literary paper--prouder than I have ever been of anything since, perhaps.
+I had written some rhymes for it--poetry I considered it--and it was a
+great grief to me that the production was on the "first side" of the
+issue that was not completed, and hence did not see the light. But time
+brings its revenges--I can put it in here; it will answer in place of a
+tear dropped to the memory of the lost Occidental. The idea (not the
+chief idea, but the vehicle that bears it) was probably suggested by the
+old song called "The Raging Canal," but I cannot remember now. I do
+remember, though, that at that time I thought my doggerel was one of the
+ablest poems of the age:
+
+
+THE AGED PILOT MAN.
+
+On the Erie Canal, it was,
+All on a summer's day,
+I sailed forth with my parents
+Far away to Albany.
+
+From out the clouds at noon that day
+There came a dreadful storm,
+That piled the billows high about,
+And filled us with alarm.
+
+A man came rushing from a house,
+Saying, "Snub up your boat I pray,
+[The customary canal technicality for "tie up."]
+Snub up your boat, snub up, alas,
+Snub up while yet you may."
+
+Our captain cast one glance astern,
+Then forward glanced he,
+And said, "My wife and little ones
+I never more shall see."
+
+Said Dollinger the pilot man,
+In noble words, but few,
+--"Fear not, but lean on Dollinger,
+And he will fetch you through."
+
+The boat drove on, the frightened mules
+Tore through the rain and wind,
+And bravely still, in danger's post,
+The whip-boy strode behind.
+
+"Come 'board, come 'board," the captain cried,
+"Nor tempt so wild a storm;"
+But still the raging mules advanced,
+And still the boy strode on.
+
+Then said the captain to us all,
+"Alas, 'tis plain to me,
+The greater danger is not there,
+But here upon the sea.
+
+"So let us strive, while life remains,
+To save all souls on board,
+And then if die at last we must,
+Let . . . . I cannot speak the word!"
+
+Said Dollinger the pilot man,
+Tow'ring above the crew,
+"Fear not, but trust in Dollinger,
+And he will fetch you through."
+
+"Low bridge! low bridge!" all heads went down,
+The laboring bark sped on;
+A mill we passed, we passed church,
+Hamlets, and fields of corn;
+And all the world came out to see,
+And chased along the shore
+Crying, "Alas, alas, the sheeted rain,
+The wind, the tempest's roar!
+Alas, the gallant ship and crew,
+Can nothing help them more?"
+
+And from our deck sad eyes looked out
+Across the stormy scene:
+The tossing wake of billows aft,
+The bending forests green,
+The chickens sheltered under carts
+In lee of barn the cows,
+The skurrying swine with straw in mouth,
+The wild spray from our bows!
+
+"She balances!
+She wavers!
+Now let her go about!
+If she misses stays and broaches to,
+We're all"--then with a shout,
+"Huray! huray!
+Avast! belay!
+Take in more sail!
+Lord, what a gale!
+Ho, boy, haul taut on the hind mule's tail!"
+"Ho! lighten ship! ho! man the pump!
+Ho, hostler, heave the lead!"
+
+"A quarter-three!--'tis shoaling fast!
+Three feet large!--t-h-r-e-e feet!
+--Three feet scant!" I cried in fright
+"Oh, is there no retreat?"
+
+Said Dollinger, the pilot man,
+As on the vessel flew,
+"Fear not, but trust in Dollinger,
+And he will fetch you through."
+
+A panic struck the bravest hearts,
+The boldest cheek turned pale;
+For plain to all, this shoaling said
+A leak had burst the ditch's bed!
+And, straight as bolt from crossbow sped,
+Our ship swept on, with shoaling lead,
+Before the fearful gale!
+
+"Sever the tow-line! Cripple the mules!"
+Too late! There comes a shock!
+Another length, and the fated craft
+Would have swum in the saving lock!
+
+Then gathered together the shipwrecked crew
+And took one last embrace,
+While sorrowful tears from despairing eyes
+Ran down each hopeless face;
+And some did think of their little ones
+Whom they never more might see,
+And others of waiting wives at home,
+And mothers that grieved would be.
+
+But of all the children of misery there
+On that poor sinking frame,
+But one spake words of hope and faith,
+And I worshipped as they came:
+Said Dollinger the pilot man,
+--(O brave heart, strong and true!)
+--"Fear not, but trust in Dollinger,
+For he will fetch you through."
+
+Lo! scarce the words have passed his lips
+The dauntless prophet say'th,
+When every soul about him seeth
+A wonder crown his faith!
+
+"And count ye all, both great and small,
+As numbered with the dead:
+For mariner for forty year,
+On Erie, boy and man,
+I never yet saw such a storm,
+Or one't with it began!"
+
+So overboard a keg of nails
+And anvils three we threw,
+Likewise four bales of gunny-sacks,
+Two hundred pounds of glue,
+Two sacks of corn, four ditto wheat,
+A box of books, a cow,
+A violin, Lord Byron's works,
+A rip-saw and a sow.
+
+A curve! a curve! the dangers grow!
+"Labbord!--stabbord!--s-t-e-a-d-y!--so!
+--Hard-a-port, Dol!--hellum-a-lee!
+Haw the head mule!--the aft one gee!
+Luff!--bring her to the wind!"
+
+For straight a farmer brought a plank,
+--(Mysteriously inspired)
+--And laying it unto the ship,
+In silent awe retired.
+
+Then every sufferer stood amazed
+That pilot man before;
+A moment stood. Then wondering turned,
+And speechless walked ashore.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LII.
+
+Since I desire, in this chapter, to say an instructive word or two about
+the silver mines, the reader may take this fair warning and skip, if he
+chooses. The year 1863 was perhaps the very top blossom and culmination
+of the "flush times." Virginia swarmed with men and vehicles to that
+degree that the place looked like a very hive--that is when one's vision
+could pierce through the thick fog of alkali dust that was generally
+blowing in summer. I will say, concerning this dust, that if you drove
+ten miles through it, you and your horses would be coated with it a
+sixteenth of an inch thick and present an outside appearance that was a
+uniform pale yellow color, and your buggy would have three inches of dust
+in it, thrown there by the wheels. The delicate scales used by the
+assayers were inclosed in glass cases intended to be air-tight, and yet
+some of this dust was so impalpable and so invisibly fine that it would
+get in, somehow, and impair the accuracy of those scales.
+
+Speculation ran riot, and yet there was a world of substantial business
+going on, too. All freights were brought over the mountains from
+California (150 miles) by pack-train partly, and partly in huge wagons
+drawn by such long mule teams that each team amounted to a procession,
+and it did seem, sometimes, that the grand combined procession of animals
+stretched unbroken from Virginia to California. Its long route was
+traceable clear across the deserts of the Territory by the writhing
+serpent of dust it lifted up. By these wagons, freights over that
+hundred and fifty miles were $200 a ton for small lots (same price for
+all express matter brought by stage), and $100 a ton for full loads.
+One Virginia firm received one hundred tons of freight a month, and paid
+$10,000 a month freightage. In the winter the freights were much higher.
+All the bullion was shipped in bars by stage to San Francisco (a bar was
+usually about twice the size of a pig of lead and contained from $1,500
+to $3,000 according to the amount of gold mixed with the silver), and the
+freight on it (when the shipment was large) was one and a quarter per
+cent. of its intrinsic value.
+
+So, the freight on these bars probably averaged something more than $25
+each. Small shippers paid two per cent. There were three stages a day,
+each way, and I have seen the out-going stages carry away a third of a
+ton of bullion each, and more than once I saw them divide a two-ton lot
+and take it off. However, these were extraordinary events.
+[Mr. Valentine, Wells Fargo's agent, has handled all the bullion shipped
+through the Virginia office for many a month. To his memory--which is
+excellent--we are indebted for the following exhibit of the company's
+business in the Virginia office since the first of January, 1862: From
+January 1st to April 1st, about $270,000 worth of bullion passed through
+that office, during the next quarter, $570,000; next quarter, $800,000;
+next quarter, $956,000; next quarter, $1,275,000; and for the quarter
+ending on the 30th of last June, about $1,600,000. Thus in a year and a
+half, the Virginia office only shipped $5,330,000 in bullion. During the
+year 1862 they shipped $2,615,000, so we perceive the average shipments
+have more than doubled in the last six months. This gives us room to
+promise for the Virginia office $500,000 a month for the year 1863
+(though perhaps, judging by the steady increase in the business, we are
+under estimating, somewhat). This gives us $6,000,000 for the year.
+Gold Hill and Silver City together can beat us--we will give them
+$10,000,000. To Dayton, Empire City, Ophir and Carson City, we will
+allow an aggregate of $8,000,000, which is not over the mark, perhaps,
+and may possibly be a little under it. To Esmeralda we give $4,000,000.
+To Reese River and Humboldt $2,000,000, which is liberal now, but may not
+be before the year is out. So we prognosticate that the yield of bullion
+this year will be about $30,000,000. Placing the number of mills in the
+Territory at one hundred, this gives to each the labor of producing
+$300,000 in bullion during the twelve months. Allowing them to run three
+hundred days in the year (which none of them more than do), this makes
+their work average $1,000 a day. Say the mills average twenty tons of
+rock a day and this rock worth $50 as a general thing, and you have the
+actual work of our one hundred mills figured down "to a spot"--$1,000 a
+day each, and $30,000,000 a year in the aggregate.--Enterprise.
+[A considerable over estimate--M. T.]]
+
+Two tons of silver bullion would be in the neighborhood of forty bars,
+and the freight on it over $1,000. Each coach always carried a deal of
+ordinary express matter beside, and also from fifteen to twenty
+passengers at from $25 to $30 a head. With six stages going all the
+time, Wells, Fargo and Co.'s Virginia City business was important and
+lucrative.
+
+All along under the centre of Virginia and Gold Hill, for a couple of
+miles, ran the great Comstock silver lode--a vein of ore from fifty to
+eighty feet thick between its solid walls of rock--a vein as wide as some
+of New York's streets. I will remind the reader that in Pennsylvania a
+coal vein only eight feet wide is considered ample.
+
+Virginia was a busy city of streets and houses above ground. Under it
+was another busy city, down in the bowels of the earth, where a great
+population of men thronged in and out among an intricate maze of tunnels
+and drifts, flitting hither and thither under a winking sparkle of
+lights, and over their heads towered a vast web of interlocking timbers
+that held the walls of the gutted Comstock apart. These timbers were as
+large as a man's body, and the framework stretched upward so far that no
+eye could pierce to its top through the closing gloom. It was like
+peering up through the clean-picked ribs and bones of some colossal
+skeleton. Imagine such a framework two miles long, sixty feet wide, and
+higher than any church spire in America. Imagine this stately
+lattice-work stretching down Broadway, from the St. Nicholas to Wall
+street, and a Fourth of July procession, reduced to pigmies, parading on
+top of it and flaunting their flags, high above the pinnacle of Trinity
+steeple. One can imagine that, but he cannot well imagine what that
+forest of timbers cost, from the time they were felled in the pineries
+beyond Washoe Lake, hauled up and around Mount Davidson at atrocious
+rates of freightage, then squared, let down into the deep maw of the mine
+and built up there. Twenty ample fortunes would not timber one of the
+greatest of those silver mines. The Spanish proverb says it requires a
+gold mine to "run" a silver one, and it is true. A beggar with a silver
+mine is a pitiable pauper indeed if he cannot sell.
+
+I spoke of the underground Virginia as a city. The Gould and Curry is
+only one single mine under there, among a great many others; yet the
+Gould and Curry's streets of dismal drifts and tunnels were five miles in
+extent, altogether, and its population five hundred miners. Taken as a
+whole, the underground city had some thirty miles of streets and a
+population of five or six thousand. In this present day some of those
+populations are at work from twelve to sixteen hundred feet under
+Virginia and Gold Hill, and the signal-bells that tell them what the
+superintendent above ground desires them to do are struck by telegraph as
+we strike a fire alarm. Sometimes men fall down a shaft, there, a
+thousand feet deep. In such cases, the usual plan is to hold an inquest.
+
+If you wish to visit one of those mines, you may walk through a tunnel
+about half a mile long if you prefer it, or you may take the quicker plan
+of shooting like a dart down a shaft, on a small platform. It is like
+tumbling down through an empty steeple, feet first. When you reach the
+bottom, you take a candle and tramp through drifts and tunnels where
+throngs of men are digging and blasting; you watch them send up tubs full
+of great lumps of stone--silver ore; you select choice specimens from the
+mass, as souvenirs; you admire the world of skeleton timbering; you
+reflect frequently that you are buried under a mountain, a thousand feet
+below daylight; being in the bottom of the mine you climb from "gallery"
+to "gallery," up endless ladders that stand straight up and down; when
+your legs fail you at last, you lie down in a small box-car in a cramped
+"incline" like a half-up-ended sewer and are dragged up to daylight
+feeling as if you are crawling through a coffin that has no end to it.
+Arrived at the top, you find a busy crowd of men receiving the ascending
+cars and tubs and dumping the ore from an elevation into long rows of
+bins capable of holding half a dozen tons each; under the bins are rows
+of wagons loading from chutes and trap-doors in the bins, and down the
+long street is a procession of these wagons wending toward the silver
+mills with their rich freight. It is all "done," now, and there you are.
+You need never go down again, for you have seen it all. If you have
+forgotten the process of reducing the ore in the mill and making the
+silver bars, you can go back and find it again in my Esmeralda chapters
+if so disposed.
+
+Of course these mines cave in, in places, occasionally, and then it is
+worth one's while to take the risk of descending into them and observing
+the crushing power exerted by the pressing weight of a settling mountain.
+I published such an experience in the Enterprise, once, and from it I
+will take an extract:
+
+ AN HOUR IN THE CAVED MINES.--We journeyed down into the Ophir mine,
+ yesterday, to see the earthquake. We could not go down the deep
+ incline, because it still has a propensity to cave in places.
+ Therefore we traveled through the long tunnel which enters the hill
+ above the Ophir office, and then by means of a series of long
+ ladders, climbed away down from the first to the fourth gallery.
+ Traversing a drift, we came to the Spanish line, passed five sets of
+ timbers still uninjured, and found the earthquake. Here was as
+ complete a chaos as ever was seen--vast masses of earth and
+ splintered and broken timbers piled confusedly together, with
+ scarcely an aperture left large enough for a cat to creep through.
+ Rubbish was still falling at intervals from above, and one timber
+ which had braced others earlier in the day, was now crushed down out
+ of its former position, showing that the caving and settling of the
+ tremendous mass was still going on. We were in that portion of the
+ Ophir known as the "north mines." Returning to the surface, we
+ entered a tunnel leading into the Central, for the purpose of
+ getting into the main Ophir. Descending a long incline in this
+ tunnel, we traversed a drift or so, and then went down a deep shaft
+ from whence we proceeded into the fifth gallery of the Ophir. From
+ a side-drift we crawled through a small hole and got into the midst
+ of the earthquake again--earth and broken timbers mingled together
+ without regard to grace or symmetry. A large portion of the second,
+ third and fourth galleries had caved in and gone to destruction--the
+ two latter at seven o'clock on the previous evening.
+
+ At the turn-table, near the northern extremity of the fifth gallery,
+ two big piles of rubbish had forced their way through from the fifth
+ gallery, and from the looks of the timbers, more was about to come.
+ These beams are solid--eighteen inches square; first, a great beam
+ is laid on the floor, then upright ones, five feet high, stand on
+ it, supporting another horizontal beam, and so on, square above
+ square, like the framework of a window. The superincumbent weight
+ was sufficient to mash the ends of those great upright beams fairly
+ into the solid wood of the horizontal ones three inches, compressing
+ and bending the upright beam till it curved like a bow. Before the
+ Spanish caved in, some of their twelve-inch horizontal timbers were
+ compressed in this way until they were only five inches thick!
+ Imagine the power it must take to squeeze a solid log together in
+ that way. Here, also, was a range of timbers, for a distance of
+ twenty feet, tilted six inches out of the perpendicular by the
+ weight resting upon them from the caved galleries above. You could
+ hear things cracking and giving way, and it was not pleasant to know
+ that the world overhead was slowly and silently sinking down upon
+ you. The men down in the mine do not mind it, however.
+
+ Returning along the fifth gallery, we struck the safe part of the
+ Ophir incline, and went down it to the sixth; but we found ten
+ inches of water there, and had to come back. In repairing the
+ damage done to the incline, the pump had to be stopped for two
+ hours, and in the meantime the water gained about a foot. However,
+ the pump was at work again, and the flood-water was decreasing.
+ We climbed up to the fifth gallery again and sought a deep shaft,
+ whereby we might descend to another part of the sixth, out of reach
+ of the water, but suffered disappointment, as the men had gone to
+ dinner, and there was no one to man the windlass. So, having seen
+ the earthquake, we climbed out at the Union incline and tunnel, and
+ adjourned, all dripping with candle grease and perspiration, to
+ lunch at the Ophir office.
+
+ During the great flush year of 1863, Nevada [claims to have]
+ produced $25,000,000 in bullion--almost, if not quite, a round
+ million to each thousand inhabitants, which is very well,
+ considering that she was without agriculture and manufactures.
+ Silver mining was her sole productive industry. [Since the above was
+ in type, I learn from an official source that the above figure is
+ too high, and that the yield for 1863 did not exceed $20,000,000.]
+ However, the day for large figures is approaching; the Sutro Tunnel
+ is to plow through the Comstock lode from end to end, at a depth of
+ two thousand feet, and then mining will be easy and comparatively
+ inexpensive; and the momentous matters of drainage, and hoisting and
+ hauling of ore will cease to be burdensome. This vast work will
+ absorb many years, and millions of dollars, in its completion; but
+ it will early yield money, for that desirable epoch will begin as
+ soon as it strikes the first end of the vein. The tunnel will be
+ some eight miles long, and will develop astonishing riches. Cars
+ will carry the ore through the tunnel and dump it in the mills and
+ thus do away with the present costly system of double handling and
+ transportation by mule teams. The water from the tunnel will
+ furnish the motive power for the mills. Mr. Sutro, the originator
+ of this prodigious enterprise, is one of the few men in the world
+ who is gifted with the pluck and perseverance necessary to follow up
+ and hound such an undertaking to its completion. He has converted
+ several obstinate Congresses to a deserved friendliness toward his
+ important work, and has gone up and down and to and fro in Europe
+ until he has enlisted a great moneyed interest in it there.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LIII.
+
+Every now and then, in these days, the boys used to tell me I ought to
+get one Jim Blaine to tell me the stirring story of his grandfather's old
+ram--but they always added that I must not mention the matter unless Jim
+was drunk at the time--just comfortably and sociably drunk. They kept
+this up until my curiosity was on the rack to hear the story. I got to
+haunting Blaine; but it was of no use, the boys always found fault with
+his condition; he was often moderately but never satisfactorily drunk.
+I never watched a man's condition with such absorbing interest, such
+anxious solicitude; I never so pined to see a man uncompromisingly drunk
+before. At last, one evening I hurried to his cabin, for I learned that
+this time his situation was such that even the most fastidious could find
+no fault with it--he was tranquilly, serenely, symmetrically drunk--not a
+hiccup to mar his voice, not a cloud upon his brain thick enough to
+obscure his memory. As I entered, he was sitting upon an empty
+powder-keg, with a clay pipe in one hand and the other raised to command
+silence. His face was round, red, and very serious; his throat was bare
+and his hair tumbled; in general appearance and costume he was a stalwart
+miner of the period. On the pine table stood a candle, and its dim light
+revealed "the boys" sitting here and there on bunks, candle-boxes,
+powder-kegs, etc. They said:
+
+"Sh--! Don't speak--he's going to commence."
+
+
+ THE STORY OF THE OLD RAM.
+
+I found a seat at once, and Blaine said:
+
+'I don't reckon them times will ever come again. There never was a more
+bullier old ram than what he was. Grandfather fetched him from Illinois
+--got him of a man by the name of Yates--Bill Yates--maybe you might have
+heard of him; his father was a deacon--Baptist--and he was a rustler,
+too; a man had to get up ruther early to get the start of old Thankful
+Yates; it was him that put the Greens up to jining teams with my
+grandfather when he moved west.
+
+'Seth Green was prob'ly the pick of the flock; he married a Wilkerson
+--Sarah Wilkerson--good cretur, she was--one of the likeliest heifers that
+was ever raised in old Stoddard, everybody said that knowed her. She
+could heft a bar'l of flour as easy as I can flirt a flapjack. And spin?
+Don't mention it! Independent? Humph! When Sile Hawkins come a
+browsing around her, she let him know that for all his tin he couldn't
+trot in harness alongside of her. You see, Sile Hawkins was--no, it
+warn't Sile Hawkins, after all--it was a galoot by the name of Filkins
+--I disremember his first name; but he was a stump--come into pra'r meeting
+drunk, one night, hooraying for Nixon, becuz he thought it was a primary;
+and old deacon Ferguson up and scooted him through the window and he lit
+on old Miss Jefferson's head, poor old filly. She was a good soul--had a
+glass eye and used to lend it to old Miss Wagner, that hadn't any, to
+receive company in; it warn't big enough, and when Miss Wagner warn't
+noticing, it would get twisted around in the socket, and look up, maybe,
+or out to one side, and every which way, while t' other one was looking
+as straight ahead as a spy-glass.
+
+'Grown people didn't mind it, but it most always made the children cry, it
+was so sort of scary. She tried packing it in raw cotton, but it
+wouldn't work, somehow--the cotton would get loose and stick out and look
+so kind of awful that the children couldn't stand it no way. She was
+always dropping it out, and turning up her old dead-light on the company
+empty, and making them oncomfortable, becuz she never could tell when it
+hopped out, being blind on that side, you see. So somebody would have to
+hunch her and say, "Your game eye has fetched loose. Miss Wagner dear"
+--and then all of them would have to sit and wait till she jammed it in
+again--wrong side before, as a general thing, and green as a bird's egg,
+being a bashful cretur and easy sot back before company. But being wrong
+side before warn't much difference, anyway; becuz her own eye was
+sky-blue and the glass one was yaller on the front side, so whichever way
+she turned it it didn't match nohow.
+
+'Old Miss Wagner was considerable on the borrow, she was. When she had a
+quilting, or Dorcas S'iety at her house she gen'ally borrowed Miss
+Higgins's wooden leg to stump around on; it was considerable shorter than
+her other pin, but much she minded that. She said she couldn't abide
+crutches when she had company, becuz they were so slow; said when she had
+company and things had to be done, she wanted to get up and hump herself.
+She was as bald as a jug, and so she used to borrow Miss Jacops's wig
+--Miss Jacops was the coffin-peddler's wife--a ratty old buzzard, he was,
+that used to go roosting around where people was sick, waiting for 'em;
+and there that old rip would sit all day, in the shade, on a coffin that
+he judged would fit the can'idate; and if it was a slow customer and kind
+of uncertain, he'd fetch his rations and a blanket along and sleep in the
+coffin nights. He was anchored out that way, in frosty weather, for
+about three weeks, once, before old Robbins's place, waiting for him; and
+after that, for as much as two years, Jacops was not on speaking terms
+with the old man, on account of his disapp'inting him. He got one of his
+feet froze, and lost money, too, becuz old Robbins took a favorable turn
+and got well. The next time Robbins got sick, Jacops tried to make up
+with him, and varnished up the same old coffin and fetched it along; but
+old Robbins was too many for him; he had him in, and 'peared to be
+powerful weak; he bought the coffin for ten dollars and Jacops was to pay
+it back and twenty-five more besides if Robbins didn't like the coffin
+after he'd tried it. And then Robbins died, and at the funeral he
+bursted off the lid and riz up in his shroud and told the parson to let
+up on the performances, becuz he could not stand such a coffin as that.
+You see he had been in a trance once before, when he was young, and he
+took the chances on another, cal'lating that if he made the trip it was
+money in his pocket, and if he missed fire he couldn't lose a cent. And
+by George he sued Jacops for the rhino and got jedgment; and he set up
+the coffin in his back parlor and said he 'lowed to take his time, now.
+It was always an aggravation to Jacops, the way that miserable old thing
+acted. He moved back to Indiany pretty soon--went to Wellsville
+--Wellsville was the place the Hogadorns was from. Mighty fine family.
+Old Maryland stock. Old Squire Hogadorn could carry around more mixed
+licker, and cuss better than most any man I ever see. His second wife
+was the widder Billings--she that was Becky Martin; her dam was deacon
+Dunlap's first wife. Her oldest child, Maria, married a missionary and
+died in grace--et up by the savages. They et him, too, poor feller
+--biled him. It warn't the custom, so they say, but they explained to
+friends of his'n that went down there to bring away his things, that
+they'd tried missionaries every other way and never could get any good
+out of 'em--and so it annoyed all his relations to find out that that
+man's life was fooled away just out of a dern'd experiment, so to speak.
+But mind you, there ain't anything ever reely lost; everything that
+people can't understand and don't see the reason of does good if you only
+hold on and give it a fair shake; Prov'dence don't fire no blank
+ca'tridges, boys. That there missionary's substance, unbeknowns to
+himself, actu'ly converted every last one of them heathens that took a
+chance at the barbacue. Nothing ever fetched them but that. Don't tell
+me it was an accident that he was biled. There ain't no such a thing as
+an accident.
+
+'When my uncle Lem was leaning up agin a scaffolding once, sick, or drunk,
+or suthin, an Irishman with a hod full of bricks fell on him out of the
+third story and broke the old man's back in two places. People said it
+was an accident. Much accident there was about that. He didn't know
+what he was there for, but he was there for a good object. If he hadn't
+been there the Irishman would have been killed. Nobody can ever make me
+believe anything different from that. Uncle Lem's dog was there. Why
+didn't the Irishman fall on the dog? Becuz the dog would a seen him a
+coming and stood from under. That's the reason the dog warn't appinted.
+A dog can't be depended on to carry out a special providence. Mark my
+words it was a put-up thing. Accidents don't happen, boys. Uncle Lem's
+dog--I wish you could a seen that dog. He was a reglar shepherd--or
+ruther he was part bull and part shepherd--splendid animal; belonged to
+parson Hagar before Uncle Lem got him. Parson Hagar belonged to the
+Western Reserve Hagars; prime family; his mother was a Watson; one of his
+sisters married a Wheeler; they settled in Morgan county, and he got
+nipped by the machinery in a carpet factory and went through in less than
+a quarter of a minute; his widder bought the piece of carpet that had his
+remains wove in, and people come a hundred mile to 'tend the funeral.
+There was fourteen yards in the piece.
+
+'She wouldn't let them roll him up, but planted him just so--full length.
+The church was middling small where they preached the funeral, and they
+had to let one end of the coffin stick out of the window. They didn't
+bury him--they planted one end, and let him stand up, same as a monument.
+And they nailed a sign on it and put--put on--put on it--sacred to--the
+m-e-m-o-r-y--of fourteen y-a-r-d-s--of three-ply--car---pet--containing
+all that was--m-o-r-t-a-l--of--of--W-i-l-l-i-a-m--W-h-e--'
+
+Jim Blaine had been growing gradually drowsy and drowsier--his head
+nodded, once, twice, three times--dropped peacefully upon his breast, and
+he fell tranquilly asleep. The tears were running down the boys' cheeks
+--they were suffocating with suppressed laughter--and had been from the
+start, though I had never noticed it. I perceived that I was "sold."
+I learned then that Jim Blaine's peculiarity was that whenever he reached
+a certain stage of intoxication, no human power could keep him from
+setting out, with impressive unction, to tell about a wonderful adventure
+which he had once had with his grandfather's old ram--and the mention of
+the ram in the first sentence was as far as any man had ever heard him
+get, concerning it. He always maundered off, interminably, from one
+thing to another, till his whisky got the best of him and he fell asleep.
+What the thing was that happened to him and his grandfather's old ram is
+a dark mystery to this day, for nobody has ever yet found out.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LIV.
+
+Of course there was a large Chinese population in Virginia--it is the
+case with every town and city on the Pacific coast. They are a harmless
+race when white men either let them alone or treat them no worse than
+dogs; in fact they are almost entirely harmless anyhow, for they seldom
+think of resenting the vilest insults or the cruelest injuries. They are
+quiet, peaceable, tractable, free from drunkenness, and they are as
+industrious as the day is long. A disorderly Chinaman is rare, and a
+lazy one does not exist. So long as a Chinaman has strength to use his
+hands he needs no support from anybody; white men often complain of want
+of work, but a Chinaman offers no such complaint; he always manages to
+find something to do. He is a great convenience to everybody--even to
+the worst class of white men, for he bears the most of their sins,
+suffering fines for their petty thefts, imprisonment for their robberies,
+and death for their murders. Any white man can swear a Chinaman's life
+away in the courts, but no Chinaman can testify against a white man.
+Ours is the "land of the free"--nobody denies that--nobody challenges it.
+[Maybe it is because we won't let other people testify.] As I write, news
+comes that in broad daylight in San Francisco, some boys have stoned an
+inoffensive Chinaman to death, and that although a large crowd witnessed
+the shameful deed, no one interfered.
+
+There are seventy thousand (and possibly one hundred thousand) Chinamen
+on the Pacific coast. There were about a thousand in Virginia. They
+were penned into a "Chinese quarter"--a thing which they do not
+particularly object to, as they are fond of herding together. Their
+buildings were of wood; usually only one story high, and set thickly
+together along streets scarcely wide enough for a wagon to pass through.
+Their quarter was a little removed from the rest of the town. The chief
+employment of Chinamen in towns is to wash clothing. They always send a
+bill, like this below, pinned to the clothes. It is mere ceremony, for
+it does not enlighten the customer much. Their price for washing was
+$2.50 per dozen--rather cheaper than white people could afford to wash
+for at that time. A very common sign on the Chinese houses was: "See
+Yup, Washer and Ironer"; "Hong Wo, Washer"; "Sam Sing & Ah Hop, Washing."
+The house servants, cooks, etc., in California and Nevada, were chiefly
+Chinamen. There were few white servants and no Chinawomen so employed.
+Chinamen make good house servants, being quick, obedient, patient, quick
+to learn and tirelessly industrious. They do not need to be taught a
+thing twice, as a general thing. They are imitative. If a Chinaman were
+to see his master break up a centre table, in a passion, and kindle a
+fire with it, that Chinaman would be likely to resort to the furniture
+for fuel forever afterward.
+
+All Chinamen can read, write and cipher with easy facility--pity but all
+our petted voters could. In California they rent little patches of
+ground and do a deal of gardening. They will raise surprising crops of
+vegetables on a sand pile. They waste nothing. What is rubbish to a
+Christian, a Chinaman carefully preserves and makes useful in one way or
+another. He gathers up all the old oyster and sardine cans that white
+people throw away, and procures marketable tin and solder from them by
+melting. He gathers up old bones and turns them into manure.
+In California he gets a living out of old mining claims that white men
+have abandoned as exhausted and worthless--and then the officers come
+down on him once a month with an exorbitant swindle to which the
+legislature has given the broad, general name of "foreign" mining tax,
+but it is usually inflicted on no foreigners but Chinamen. This swindle
+has in some cases been repeated once or twice on the same victim in the
+course of the same month--but the public treasury was no additionally
+enriched by it, probably.
+
+Chinamen hold their dead in great reverence--they worship their departed
+ancestors, in fact. Hence, in China, a man's front yard, back yard, or
+any other part of his premises, is made his family burying ground, in
+order that he may visit the graves at any and all times. Therefore that
+huge empire is one mighty cemetery; it is ridged and wringled from its
+centre to its circumference with graves--and inasmuch as every foot of
+ground must be made to do its utmost, in China, lest the swarming
+population suffer for food, the very graves are cultivated and yield a
+harvest, custom holding this to be no dishonor to the dead. Since the
+departed are held in such worshipful reverence, a Chinaman cannot bear
+that any indignity be offered the places where they sleep.
+Mr. Burlingame said that herein lay China's bitter opposition to
+railroads; a road could not be built anywhere in the empire without
+disturbing the graves of their ancestors or friends.
+
+A Chinaman hardly believes he could enjoy the hereafter except his body
+lay in his beloved China; also, he desires to receive, himself, after
+death, that worship with which he has honored his dead that preceded him.
+Therefore, if he visits a foreign country, he makes arrangements to have
+his bones returned to China in case he dies; if he hires to go to a
+foreign country on a labor contract, there is always a stipulation that
+his body shall be taken back to China if he dies; if the government sells
+a gang of Coolies to a foreigner for the usual five-year term, it is
+specified in the contract that their bodies shall be restored to China in
+case of death. On the Pacific coast the Chinamen all belong to one or
+another of several great companies or organizations, and these companies
+keep track of their members, register their names, and ship their bodies
+home when they die. The See Yup Company is held to be the largest of
+these. The Ning Yeong Company is next, and numbers eighteen thousand
+members on the coast. Its headquarters are at San Francisco, where it
+has a costly temple, several great officers (one of whom keeps regal
+state in seclusion and cannot be approached by common humanity), and a
+numerous priesthood. In it I was shown a register of its members, with
+the dead and the date of their shipment to China duly marked. Every ship
+that sails from San Francisco carries away a heavy freight of Chinese
+corpses--or did, at least, until the legislature, with an ingenious
+refinement of Christian cruelty, forbade the shipments, as a neat
+underhanded way of deterring Chinese immigration. The bill was offered,
+whether it passed or not. It is my impression that it passed. There was
+another bill--it became a law--compelling every incoming Chinaman to be
+vaccinated on the wharf and pay a duly appointed quack (no decent doctor
+would defile himself with such legalized robbery) ten dollars for it.
+As few importers of Chinese would want to go to an expense like that, the
+law-makers thought this would be another heavy blow to Chinese
+immigration.
+
+What the Chinese quarter of Virginia was like--or, indeed, what the
+Chinese quarter of any Pacific coast town was and is like--may be
+gathered from this item which I printed in the Enterprise while reporting
+for that paper:
+
+ CHINATOWN.--Accompanied by a fellow reporter, we made a trip through
+ our Chinese quarter the other night. The Chinese have built their
+ portion of the city to suit themselves; and as they keep neither
+ carriages nor wagons, their streets are not wide enough, as a
+ general thing, to admit of the passage of vehicles. At ten o'clock
+ at night the Chinaman may be seen in all his glory. In every little
+ cooped-up, dingy cavern of a hut, faint with the odor of burning
+ Josh-lights and with nothing to see the gloom by save the sickly,
+ guttering tallow candle, were two or three yellow, long-tailed
+ vagabonds, coiled up on a sort of short truckle-bed, smoking opium,
+ motionless and with their lustreless eyes turned inward from excess
+ of satisfaction--or rather the recent smoker looks thus, immediately
+ after having passed the pipe to his neighbor--for opium-smoking is a
+ comfortless operation, and requires constant attention. A lamp sits
+ on the bed, the length of the long pipe-stem from the smoker's
+ mouth; he puts a pellet of opium on the end of a wire, sets it on
+ fire, and plasters it into the pipe much as a Christian would fill a
+ hole with putty; then he applies the bowl to the lamp and proceeds
+ to smoke--and the stewing and frying of the drug and the gurgling of
+ the juices in the stem would well-nigh turn the stomach of a statue.
+ John likes it, though; it soothes him, he takes about two dozen
+ whiffs, and then rolls over to dream, Heaven only knows what, for we
+ could not imagine by looking at the soggy creature. Possibly in his
+ visions he travels far away from the gross world and his regular
+ washing, and feast on succulent rats and birds'-nests in Paradise.
+
+Mr. Ah Sing keeps a general grocery and provision store at No. 13 Wang
+street. He lavished his hospitality upon our party in the friendliest
+way. He had various kinds of colored and colorless wines and brandies,
+with unpronouncable names, imported from China in little crockery jugs,
+and which he offered to us in dainty little miniature wash-basins of
+porcelain. He offered us a mess of birds'-nests; also, small, neat
+sausages, of which we could have swallowed several yards if we had chosen
+to try, but we suspected that each link contained the corpse of a mouse,
+and therefore refrained. Mr. Sing had in his store a thousand articles
+of merchandise, curious to behold, impossible to imagine the uses of, and
+beyond our ability to describe.
+
+His ducks, however, and his eggs, we could understand; the former were
+split open and flattened out like codfish, and came from China in that
+shape, and the latter were plastered over with some kind of paste which
+kept them fresh and palatable through the long voyage.
+
+We found Mr. Hong Wo, No. 37 Chow-chow street, making up a lottery
+scheme--in fact we found a dozen others occupied in the same way in
+various parts of the quarter, for about every third Chinaman runs a
+lottery, and the balance of the tribe "buck" at it. "Tom," who speaks
+faultless English, and used to be chief and only cook to the Territorial
+Enterprise, when the establishment kept bachelor's hall two years ago,
+said that "Sometime Chinaman buy ticket one dollar hap, ketch um two tree
+hundred, sometime no ketch um anything; lottery like one man fight um
+seventy--may-be he whip, may-be he get whip heself, welly good."
+
+However, the percentage being sixty-nine against him, the chances are,
+as a general thing, that "he get whip heself." We could not see that
+these lotteries differed in any respect from our own, save that the
+figures being Chinese, no ignorant white man might ever hope to succeed
+in telling "t'other from which;" the manner of drawing is similar to
+ours.
+
+Mr. See Yup keeps a fancy store on Live Fox street. He sold us fans of
+white feathers, gorgeously ornamented; perfumery that smelled like
+Limburger cheese, Chinese pens, and watch-charms made of a stone
+unscratchable with steel instruments, yet polished and tinted like the
+inner coat of a sea-shell. As tokens of his esteem, See Yup presented
+the party with gaudy plumes made of gold tinsel and trimmed with
+peacocks' feathers.
+
+We ate chow-chow with chop-sticks in the celestial restaurants; our
+comrade chided the moon-eyed damsels in front of the houses for their
+want of feminine reserve; we received protecting Josh-lights from our
+hosts and "dickered" for a pagan God or two. Finally, we were impressed
+with the genius of a Chinese book-keeper; he figured up his accounts on a
+machine like a gridiron with buttons strung on its bars; the different
+rows represented units, tens, hundreds and thousands. He fingered them
+with incredible rapidity--in fact, he pushed them from place to place as
+fast as a musical professor's fingers travel over the keys of a piano.
+
+They are a kindly disposed, well-meaning race, and are respected and well
+treated by the upper classes, all over the Pacific coast. No Californian
+gentleman or lady ever abuses or oppresses a Chinaman, under any
+circumstances, an explanation that seems to be much needed in the East.
+Only the scum of the population do it--they and their children; they,
+and, naturally and consistently, the policemen and politicians, likewise,
+for these are the dust-licking pimps and slaves of the scum, there as
+well as elsewhere in America.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LV.
+
+I began to get tired of staying in one place so long.
+
+There was no longer satisfying variety in going down to Carson to report
+the proceedings of the legislature once a year, and horse-races and
+pumpkin-shows once in three months; (they had got to raising pumpkins and
+potatoes in Washoe Valley, and of course one of the first achievements of
+the legislature was to institute a ten-thousand-dollar Agricultural Fair
+to show off forty dollars' worth of those pumpkins in--however, the
+territorial legislature was usually spoken of as the "asylum"). I wanted
+to see San Francisco. I wanted to go somewhere. I wanted--I did not
+know what I wanted. I had the "spring fever" and wanted a change,
+principally, no doubt. Besides, a convention had framed a State
+Constitution; nine men out of every ten wanted an office; I believed that
+these gentlemen would "treat" the moneyless and the irresponsible among
+the population into adopting the constitution and thus well-nigh killing
+the country (it could not well carry such a load as a State government,
+since it had nothing to tax that could stand a tax, for undeveloped mines
+could not, and there were not fifty developed ones in the land, there was
+but little realty to tax, and it did seem as if nobody was ever going to
+think of the simple salvation of inflicting a money penalty on murder).
+I believed that a State government would destroy the "flush times," and I
+wanted to get away. I believed that the mining stocks I had on hand
+would soon be worth $100,000, and thought if they reached that before the
+Constitution was adopted, I would sell out and make myself secure from
+the crash the change of government was going to bring. I considered
+$100,000 sufficient to go home with decently, though it was but a small
+amount compared to what I had been expecting to return with. I felt
+rather down-hearted about it, but I tried to comfort myself with the
+reflection that with such a sum I could not fall into want. About this
+time a schoolmate of mine whom I had not seen since boyhood, came
+tramping in on foot from Reese River, a very allegory of Poverty.
+The son of wealthy parents, here he was, in a strange land, hungry,
+bootless, mantled in an ancient horse-blanket, roofed with a brimless
+hat, and so generally and so extravagantly dilapidated that he could have
+"taken the shine out of the Prodigal Son himself," as he pleasantly
+remarked.
+
+He wanted to borrow forty-six dollars--twenty-six to take him to San
+Francisco, and twenty for something else; to buy some soap with, maybe,
+for he needed it. I found I had but little more than the amount wanted,
+in my pocket; so I stepped in and borrowed forty-six dollars of a banker
+(on twenty days' time, without the formality of a note), and gave it him,
+rather than walk half a block to the office, where I had some specie laid
+up. If anybody had told me that it would take me two years to pay back
+that forty-six dollars to the banker (for I did not expect it of the
+Prodigal, and was not disappointed), I would have felt injured. And so
+would the banker.
+
+I wanted a change. I wanted variety of some kind. It came. Mr. Goodman
+went away for a week and left me the post of chief editor. It destroyed
+me. The first day, I wrote my "leader" in the forenoon. The second day,
+I had no subject and put it off till the afternoon. The third day I put
+it off till evening, and then copied an elaborate editorial out of the
+"American Cyclopedia," that steadfast friend of the editor, all over this
+land. The fourth day I "fooled around" till midnight, and then fell back
+on the Cyclopedia again. The fifth day I cudgeled my brain till
+midnight, and then kept the press waiting while I penned some bitter
+personalities on six different people. The sixth day I labored in
+anguish till far into the night and brought forth--nothing. The paper
+went to press without an editorial. The seventh day I resigned. On the
+eighth, Mr. Goodman returned and found six duels on his hands--my
+personalities had borne fruit.
+
+Nobody, except he has tried it, knows what it is to be an editor. It is
+easy to scribble local rubbish, with the facts all before you; it is easy
+to clip selections from other papers; it is easy to string out a
+correspondence from any locality; but it is unspeakable hardship to write
+editorials. Subjects are the trouble--the dreary lack of them, I mean.
+Every day, it is drag, drag, drag--think, and worry and suffer--all the
+world is a dull blank, and yet the editorial columns must be filled.
+Only give the editor a subject, and his work is done--it is no trouble to
+write it up; but fancy how you would feel if you had to pump your brains
+dry every day in the week, fifty-two weeks in the year. It makes one low
+spirited simply to think of it. The matter that each editor of a daily
+paper in America writes in the course of a year would fill from four to
+eight bulky volumes like this book! Fancy what a library an editor's
+work would make, after twenty or thirty years' service. Yet people often
+marvel that Dickens, Scott, Bulwer, Dumas, etc., have been able to
+produce so many books. If these authors had wrought as voluminously as
+newspaper editors do, the result would be something to marvel at, indeed.
+How editors can continue this tremendous labor, this exhausting
+consumption of brain fibre (for their work is creative, and not a mere
+mechanical laying-up of facts, like reporting), day after day and year
+after year, is incomprehensible. Preachers take two months' holiday in
+midsummer, for they find that to produce two sermons a week is wearing,
+in the long run. In truth it must be so, and is so; and therefore, how
+an editor can take from ten to twenty texts and build upon them from ten
+to twenty painstaking editorials a week and keep it up all the year
+round, is farther beyond comprehension than ever. Ever since I survived
+my week as editor, I have found at least one pleasure in any newspaper
+that comes to my hand; it is in admiring the long columns of editorial,
+and wondering to myself how in the mischief he did it!
+
+Mr. Goodman's return relieved me of employment, unless I chose to become
+a reporter again. I could not do that; I could not serve in the ranks
+after being General of the army. So I thought I would depart and go
+abroad into the world somewhere. Just at this juncture, Dan, my
+associate in the reportorial department, told me, casually, that two
+citizens had been trying to persuade him to go with them to New York and
+aid in selling a rich silver mine which they had discovered and secured
+in a new mining district in our neighborhood. He said they offered to
+pay his expenses and give him one third of the proceeds of the sale.
+He had refused to go. It was the very opportunity I wanted. I abused
+him for keeping so quiet about it, and not mentioning it sooner. He said
+it had not occurred to him that I would like to go, and so he had
+recommended them to apply to Marshall, the reporter of the other paper.
+I asked Dan if it was a good, honest mine, and no swindle. He said the
+men had shown him nine tons of the rock, which they had got out to take
+to New York, and he could cheerfully say that he had seen but little rock
+in Nevada that was richer; and moreover, he said that they had secured a
+tract of valuable timber and a mill-site, near the mine. My first idea
+was to kill Dan. But I changed my mind, notwithstanding I was so angry,
+for I thought maybe the chance was not yet lost. Dan said it was by no
+means lost; that the men were absent at the mine again, and would not be
+in Virginia to leave for the East for some ten days; that they had
+requested him to do the talking to Marshall, and he had promised that he
+would either secure Marshall or somebody else for them by the time they
+got back; he would now say nothing to anybody till they returned, and
+then fulfil his promise by furnishing me to them.
+
+It was splendid. I went to bed all on fire with excitement; for nobody
+had yet gone East to sell a Nevada silver mine, and the field was white
+for the sickle. I felt that such a mine as the one described by Dan
+would bring a princely sum in New York, and sell without delay or
+difficulty. I could not sleep, my fancy so rioted through its castles in
+the air. It was the "blind lead" come again.
+
+Next day I got away, on the coach, with the usual eclat attending
+departures of old citizens,--for if you have only half a dozen friends
+out there they will make noise for a hundred rather than let you seem to
+go away neglected and unregretted--and Dan promised to keep strict watch
+for the men that had the mine to sell.
+
+The trip was signalized but by one little incident, and that occurred
+just as we were about to start. A very seedy looking vagabond passenger
+got out of the stage a moment to wait till the usual ballast of silver
+bricks was thrown in. He was standing on the pavement, when an awkward
+express employee, carrying a brick weighing a hundred pounds, stumbled
+and let it fall on the bummer's foot. He instantly dropped on the ground
+and began to howl in the most heart-breaking way. A sympathizing crowd
+gathered around and were going to pull his boot off; but he screamed
+louder than ever and they desisted; then he fell to gasping, and between
+the gasps ejaculated "Brandy! for Heaven's sake, brandy!" They poured
+half a pint down him, and it wonderfully restored and comforted him.
+Then he begged the people to assist him to the stage, which was done.
+The express people urged him to have a doctor at their expense, but he
+declined, and said that if he only had a little brandy to take along with
+him, to soothe his paroxyms of pain when they came on, he would be
+grateful and content. He was quickly supplied with two bottles, and we
+drove off. He was so smiling and happy after that, that I could not
+refrain from asking him how he could possibly be so comfortable with a
+crushed foot.
+
+"Well," said he, "I hadn't had a drink for twelve hours, and hadn't a
+cent to my name. I was most perishing--and so, when that duffer dropped
+that hundred-pounder on my foot, I see my chance. Got a cork leg, you
+know!" and he pulled up his pantaloons and proved it.
+
+He was as drunk as a lord all day long, and full of chucklings over his
+timely ingenuity.
+
+One drunken man necessarily reminds one of another. I once heard a
+gentleman tell about an incident which he witnessed in a Californian
+bar-room. He entitled it "Ye Modest Man Taketh a Drink." It was nothing
+but a bit of acting, but it seemed to me a perfect rendering, and worthy
+of Toodles himself. The modest man, tolerably far gone with beer and
+other matters, enters a saloon (twenty-five cents is the price for
+anything and everything, and specie the only money used) and lays down a
+half dollar; calls for whiskey and drinks it; the bar-keeper makes change
+and lays the quarter in a wet place on the counter; the modest man
+fumbles at it with nerveless fingers, but it slips and the water holds
+it; he contemplates it, and tries again; same result; observes that
+people are interested in what he is at, blushes; fumbles at the quarter
+again--blushes--puts his forefinger carefully, slowly down, to make sure
+of his aim--pushes the coin toward the bar-keeper, and says with a sigh:
+
+"Gimme a cigar!"
+
+Naturally, another gentleman present told about another drunken man. He
+said he reeled toward home late at night; made a mistake and entered the
+wrong gate; thought he saw a dog on the stoop; and it was--an iron one.
+
+He stopped and considered; wondered if it was a dangerous dog; ventured
+to say "Be (hic) begone!" No effect. Then he approached warily, and
+adopted conciliation; pursed up his lips and tried to whistle, but
+failed; still approached, saying, "Poor dog!--doggy, doggy, doggy!--poor
+doggy-dog!" Got up on the stoop, still petting with fond names; till
+master of the advantages; then exclaimed, "Leave, you thief!"--planted a
+vindictive kick in his ribs, and went head-over-heels overboard, of
+course. A pause; a sigh or two of pain, and then a remark in a
+reflective voice:
+
+"Awful solid dog. What could he ben eating? ('ic!) Rocks, p'raps.
+Such animals is dangerous.--' At's what I say--they're dangerous. If a
+man--('ic!)--if a man wants to feed a dog on rocks, let him feed him on
+rocks; 'at's all right; but let him keep him at home--not have him layin'
+round promiscuous, where ('ic!) where people's liable to stumble over him
+when they ain't noticin'!"
+
+It was not without regret that I took a last look at the tiny flag (it
+was thirty-five feet long and ten feet wide) fluttering like a lady's
+handkerchief from the topmost peak of Mount Davidson, two thousand feet
+above Virginia's roofs, and felt that doubtless I was bidding a permanent
+farewell to a city which had afforded me the most vigorous enjoyment of
+life I had ever experienced. And this reminds me of an incident which
+the dullest memory Virginia could boast at the time it happened must
+vividly recall, at times, till its possessor dies. Late one summer
+afternoon we had a rain shower.
+
+That was astonishing enough, in itself, to set the whole town buzzing,
+for it only rains (during a week or two weeks) in the winter in Nevada,
+and even then not enough at a time to make it worth while for any
+merchant to keep umbrellas for sale. But the rain was not the chief
+wonder. It only lasted five or ten minutes; while the people were still
+talking about it all the heavens gathered to themselves a dense blackness
+as of midnight. All the vast eastern front of Mount Davidson,
+over-looking the city, put on such a funereal gloom that only the
+nearness and solidity of the mountain made its outlines even faintly
+distinguishable from the dead blackness of the heavens they rested
+against. This unaccustomed sight turned all eyes toward the mountain;
+and as they looked, a little tongue of rich golden flame was seen waving
+and quivering in the heart of the midnight, away up on the extreme
+summit! In a few minutes the streets were packed with people, gazing with
+hardly an uttered word, at the one brilliant mote in the brooding world
+of darkness. It flicked like a candle-flame, and looked no larger; but
+with such a background it was wonderfully bright, small as it was. It
+was the flag!--though no one suspected it at first, it seemed so like a
+supernatural visitor of some kind--a mysterious messenger of good
+tidings, some were fain to believe. It was the nation's emblem
+transfigured by the departing rays of a sun that was entirely palled from
+view; and on no other object did the glory fall, in all the broad
+panorama of mountain ranges and deserts. Not even upon the staff of the
+flag--for that, a needle in the distance at any time, was now untouched
+by the light and undistinguishable in the gloom. For a whole hour the
+weird visitor winked and burned in its lofty solitude, and still the
+thousands of uplifted eyes watched it with fascinated interest. How the
+people were wrought up! The superstition grew apace that this was a
+mystic courier come with great news from the war--the poetry of the idea
+excusing and commending it--and on it spread, from heart to heart, from
+lip to lip and from street to street, till there was a general impulse to
+have out the military and welcome the bright waif with a salvo of
+artillery!
+
+And all that time one sorely tried man, the telegraph operator sworn to
+official secrecy, had to lock his lips and chain his tongue with a
+silence that was like to rend them; for he, and he only, of all the
+speculating multitude, knew the great things this sinking sun had seen
+that day in the east--Vicksburg fallen, and the Union arms victorious at
+Gettysburg!
+
+But for the journalistic monopoly that forbade the slightest revealment
+of eastern news till a day after its publication in the California
+papers, the glorified flag on Mount Davidson would have been saluted and
+re-saluted, that memorable evening, as long as there was a charge of
+powder to thunder with; the city would have been illuminated, and every
+man that had any respect for himself would have got drunk,--as was the
+custom of the country on all occasions of public moment. Even at this
+distant day I cannot think of this needlessly marred supreme opportunity
+without regret. What a time we might have had!
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LVI.
+
+We rumbled over the plains and valleys, climbed the Sierras to the
+clouds, and looked down upon summer-clad California. And I will remark
+here, in passing, that all scenery in California requires distance to
+give it its highest charm. The mountains are imposing in their sublimity
+and their majesty of form and altitude, from any point of view--but one
+must have distance to soften their ruggedness and enrich their tintings;
+a Californian forest is best at a little distance, for there is a sad
+poverty of variety in species, the trees being chiefly of one monotonous
+family--redwood, pine, spruce, fir--and so, at a near view there is a
+wearisome sameness of attitude in their rigid arms, stretched down ward
+and outward in one continued and reiterated appeal to all men to "Sh!
+--don't say a word!--you might disturb somebody!" Close at hand, too,
+there is a reliefless and relentless smell of pitch and turpentine; there
+is a ceaseless melancholy in their sighing and complaining foliage; one
+walks over a soundless carpet of beaten yellow bark and dead spines of
+the foliage till he feels like a wandering spirit bereft of a footfall;
+he tires of the endless tufts of needles and yearns for substantial,
+shapely leaves; he looks for moss and grass to loll upon, and finds none,
+for where there is no bark there is naked clay and dirt, enemies to
+pensive musing and clean apparel. Often a grassy plain in California, is
+what it should be, but often, too, it is best contemplated at a distance,
+because although its grass blades are tall, they stand up vindictively
+straight and self-sufficient, and are unsociably wide apart, with
+uncomely spots of barren sand between.
+
+One of the queerest things I know of, is to hear tourists from "the
+States" go into ecstasies over the loveliness of "ever-blooming
+California." And they always do go into that sort of ecstasies. But
+perhaps they would modify them if they knew how old Californians, with
+the memory full upon them of the dust-covered and questionable summer
+greens of Californian "verdure," stand astonished, and filled with
+worshipping admiration, in the presence of the lavish richness, the
+brilliant green, the infinite freshness, the spend-thrift variety of form
+and species and foliage that make an Eastern landscape a vision of
+Paradise itself. The idea of a man falling into raptures over grave and
+sombre California, when that man has seen New England's meadow-expanses
+and her maples, oaks and cathedral-windowed elms decked in summer attire,
+or the opaline splendors of autumn descending upon her forests, comes
+very near being funny--would be, in fact, but that it is so pathetic.
+No land with an unvarying climate can be very beautiful. The tropics are
+not, for all the sentiment that is wasted on them. They seem beautiful
+at first, but sameness impairs the charm by and by. Change is the
+handmaiden Nature requires to do her miracles with. The land that has
+four well-defined seasons, cannot lack beauty, or pall with monotony.
+Each season brings a world of enjoyment and interest in the watching of
+its unfolding, its gradual, harmonious development, its culminating
+graces--and just as one begins to tire of it, it passes away and a
+radical change comes, with new witcheries and new glories in its train.
+And I think that to one in sympathy with nature, each season, in its
+turn, seems the loveliest.
+
+San Francisco, a truly fascinating city to live in, is stately and
+handsome at a fair distance, but close at hand one notes that the
+architecture is mostly old-fashioned, many streets are made up of
+decaying, smoke-grimed, wooden houses, and the barren sand-hills toward
+the outskirts obtrude themselves too prominently. Even the kindly
+climate is sometimes pleasanter when read about than personally
+experienced, for a lovely, cloudless sky wears out its welcome by and by,
+and then when the longed for rain does come it stays. Even the playful
+earthquake is better contemplated at a dis----
+
+However there are varying opinions about that.
+
+The climate of San Francisco is mild and singularly equable. The
+thermometer stands at about seventy degrees the year round. It hardly
+changes at all. You sleep under one or two light blankets Summer and
+Winter, and never use a mosquito bar. Nobody ever wears Summer clothing.
+You wear black broadcloth--if you have it--in August and January, just
+the same. It is no colder, and no warmer, in the one month than the
+other. You do not use overcoats and you do not use fans. It is as
+pleasant a climate as could well be contrived, take it all around, and is
+doubtless the most unvarying in the whole world. The wind blows there a
+good deal in the summer months, but then you can go over to Oakland, if
+you choose--three or four miles away--it does not blow there. It has
+only snowed twice in San Francisco in nineteen years, and then it only
+remained on the ground long enough to astonish the children, and set them
+to wondering what the feathery stuff was.
+
+During eight months of the year, straight along, the skies are bright and
+cloudless, and never a drop of rain falls. But when the other four
+months come along, you will need to go and steal an umbrella. Because
+you will require it. Not just one day, but one hundred and twenty days
+in hardly varying succession. When you want to go visiting, or attend
+church, or the theatre, you never look up at the clouds to see whether it
+is likely to rain or not--you look at the almanac. If it is Winter, it
+will rain--and if it is Summer, it won't rain, and you cannot help it.
+You never need a lightning-rod, because it never thunders and it never
+lightens. And after you have listened for six or eight weeks, every
+night, to the dismal monotony of those quiet rains, you will wish in your
+heart the thunder would leap and crash and roar along those drowsy skies
+once, and make everything alive--you will wish the prisoned lightnings
+would cleave the dull firmament asunder and light it with a blinding
+glare for one little instant. You would give anything to hear the old
+familiar thunder again and see the lightning strike somebody. And along
+in the Summer, when you have suffered about four months of lustrous,
+pitiless sunshine, you are ready to go down on your knees and plead for
+rain--hail--snow--thunder and lightning--anything to break the monotony
+--you will take an earthquake, if you cannot do any better. And the
+chances are that you'll get it, too.
+
+San Francisco is built on sand hills, but they are prolific sand hills.
+They yield a generous vegetation. All the rare flowers which people in
+"the States" rear with such patient care in parlor flower-pots and
+green-houses, flourish luxuriantly in the open air there all the year
+round. Calla lilies, all sorts of geraniums, passion flowers, moss
+roses--I do not know the names of a tenth part of them. I only know that
+while New Yorkers are burdened with banks and drifts of snow,
+Californians are burdened with banks and drifts of flowers, if they only
+keep their hands off and let them grow. And I have heard that they have
+also that rarest and most curious of all the flowers, the beautiful
+Espiritu Santo, as the Spaniards call it--or flower of the Holy Spirit
+--though I thought it grew only in Central America--down on the Isthmus.
+In its cup is the daintiest little facsimile of a dove, as pure as snow.
+The Spaniards have a superstitious reverence for it. The blossom has
+been conveyed to the States, submerged in ether; and the bulb has been
+taken thither also, but every attempt to make it bloom after it arrived,
+has failed.
+
+I have elsewhere spoken of the endless Winter of Mono, California, and
+but this moment of the eternal Spring of San Francisco. Now if we travel
+a hundred miles in a straight line, we come to the eternal Summer of
+Sacramento. One never sees Summer-clothing or mosquitoes in San
+Francisco--but they can be found in Sacramento. Not always and
+unvaryingly, but about one hundred and forty-three months out of twelve
+years, perhaps. Flowers bloom there, always, the reader can easily
+believe--people suffer and sweat, and swear, morning, noon and night, and
+wear out their stanchest energies fanning themselves. It gets hot there,
+but if you go down to Fort Yuma you will find it hotter. Fort Yuma is
+probably the hottest place on earth. The thermometer stays at one
+hundred and twenty in the shade there all the time--except when it varies
+and goes higher. It is a U.S. military post, and its occupants get so
+used to the terrific heat that they suffer without it. There is a
+tradition (attributed to John Phenix [It has been purloined by fifty
+different scribblers who were too poor to invent a fancy but not ashamed
+to steal one.--M. T.]) that a very, very wicked soldier died there,
+once, and of course, went straight to the hottest corner of perdition,
+--and the next day he telegraphed back for his blankets. There is no doubt
+about the truth of this statement--there can be no doubt about it. I
+have seen the place where that soldier used to board. In Sacramento it
+is fiery Summer always, and you can gather roses, and eat strawberries
+and ice-cream, and wear white linen clothes, and pant and perspire, at
+eight or nine o'clock in the morning, and then take the cars, and at noon
+put on your furs and your skates, and go skimming over frozen Donner
+Lake, seven thousand feet above the valley, among snow banks fifteen feet
+deep, and in the shadow of grand mountain peaks that lift their frosty
+crags ten thousand feet above the level of the sea.
+
+There is a transition for you! Where will you find another like it in
+the Western hemisphere? And some of us have swept around snow-walled
+curves of the Pacific Railroad in that vicinity, six thousand feet above
+the sea, and looked down as the birds do, upon the deathless Summer of
+the Sacramento Valley, with its fruitful fields, its feathery foliage,
+its silver streams, all slumbering in the mellow haze of its enchanted
+atmosphere, and all infinitely softened and spiritualized by distance--a
+dreamy, exquisite glimpse of fairyland, made all the more charming and
+striking that it was caught through a forbidden gateway of ice and snow,
+and savage crags and precipices.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LVII.
+
+It was in this Sacramento Valley, just referred to, that a deal of the
+most lucrative of the early gold mining was done, and you may still see,
+in places, its grassy slopes and levels torn and guttered and disfigured
+by the avaricious spoilers of fifteen and twenty years ago. You may see
+such disfigurements far and wide over California--and in some such
+places, where only meadows and forests are visible--not a living
+creature, not a house, no stick or stone or remnant of a ruin, and not a
+sound, not even a whisper to disturb the Sabbath stillness--you will find
+it hard to believe that there stood at one time a fiercely-flourishing
+little city, of two thousand or three thousand souls, with its newspaper,
+fire company, brass band, volunteer militia, bank, hotels, noisy Fourth
+of July processions and speeches, gambling hells crammed with tobacco
+smoke, profanity, and rough-bearded men of all nations and colors, with
+tables heaped with gold dust sufficient for the revenues of a German
+principality--streets crowded and rife with business--town lots worth
+four hundred dollars a front foot--labor, laughter, music, dancing,
+swearing, fighting, shooting, stabbing--a bloody inquest and a man for
+breakfast every morning--everything that delights and adorns existence
+--all the appointments and appurtenances of a thriving and prosperous and
+promising young city,--and now nothing is left of it all but a lifeless,
+homeless solitude. The men are gone, the houses have vanished, even the
+name of the place is forgotten. In no other land, in modern times, have
+towns so absolutely died and disappeared, as in the old mining regions of
+California.
+
+It was a driving, vigorous, restless population in those days. It was a
+curious population. It was the only population of the kind that the
+world has ever seen gathered together, and it is not likely that the
+world will ever see its like again. For observe, it was an assemblage of
+two hundred thousand young men--not simpering, dainty, kid-gloved
+weaklings, but stalwart, muscular, dauntless young braves, brimful of
+push and energy, and royally endowed with every attribute that goes to
+make up a peerless and magnificent manhood--the very pick and choice of
+the world's glorious ones. No women, no children, no gray and stooping
+veterans,--none but erect, bright-eyed, quick-moving, strong-handed young
+giants--the strangest population, the finest population, the most gallant
+host that ever trooped down the startled solitudes of an unpeopled land.
+And where are they now? Scattered to the ends of the earth--or
+prematurely aged and decrepit--or shot or stabbed in street affrays--or
+dead of disappointed hopes and broken hearts--all gone, or nearly all
+--victims devoted upon the altar of the golden calf--the noblest holocaust
+that ever wafted its sacrificial incense heavenward. It is pitiful to
+think upon.
+
+It was a splendid population--for all the slow, sleepy, sluggish-brained
+sloths staid at home--you never find that sort of people among pioneers
+--you cannot build pioneers out of that sort of material. It was that
+population that gave to California a name for getting up astounding
+enterprises and rushing them through with a magnificent dash and daring
+and a recklessness of cost or consequences, which she bears unto this
+day--and when she projects a new surprise, the grave world smiles as
+usual, and says "Well, that is California all over."
+
+But they were rough in those times! They fairly reveled in gold, whisky,
+fights, and fandangoes, and were unspeakably happy. The honest miner
+raked from a hundred to a thousand dollars out of his claim a day, and
+what with the gambling dens and the other entertainments, he hadn't a
+cent the next morning, if he had any sort of luck. They cooked their own
+bacon and beans, sewed on their own buttons, washed their own shirts
+--blue woollen ones; and if a man wanted a fight on his hands without any
+annoying delay, all he had to do was to appear in public in a white shirt
+or a stove-pipe hat, and he would be accommodated. For those people
+hated aristocrats. They had a particular and malignant animosity toward
+what they called a "biled shirt."
+
+It was a wild, free, disorderly, grotesque society! Men--only swarming
+hosts of stalwart men--nothing juvenile, nothing feminine, visible
+anywhere!
+
+In those days miners would flock in crowds to catch a glimpse of that
+rare and blessed spectacle, a woman! Old inhabitants tell how, in a
+certain camp, the news went abroad early in the morning that a woman was
+come! They had seen a calico dress hanging out of a wagon down at the
+camping-ground--sign of emigrants from over the great plains. Everybody
+went down there, and a shout went up when an actual, bona fide dress was
+discovered fluttering in the wind! The male emigrant was visible. The
+miners said:
+
+"Fetch her out!"
+
+He said: "It is my wife, gentlemen--she is sick--we have been robbed of
+money, provisions, everything, by the Indians--we want to rest."
+
+"Fetch her out! We've got to see her!"
+
+"But, gentlemen, the poor thing, she--"
+
+"FETCH HER OUT!"
+
+He "fetched her out," and they swung their hats and sent up three rousing
+cheers and a tiger; and they crowded around and gazed at her, and touched
+her dress, and listened to her voice with the look of men who listened to
+a memory rather than a present reality--and then they collected
+twenty-five hundred dollars in gold and gave it to the man, and swung
+their hats again and gave three more cheers, and went home satisfied.
+
+
+Once I dined in San Francisco with the family of a pioneer, and talked
+with his daughter, a young lady whose first experience in San Francisco
+was an adventure, though she herself did not remember it, as she was only
+two or three years old at the time. Her father said that, after landing
+from the ship, they were walking up the street, a servant leading the
+party with the little girl in her arms. And presently a huge miner,
+bearded, belted, spurred, and bristling with deadly weapons--just down
+from a long campaign in the mountains, evidently-barred the way, stopped
+the servant, and stood gazing, with a face all alive with gratification
+and astonishment. Then he said, reverently:
+
+"Well, if it ain't a child!" And then he snatched a little leather sack
+out of his pocket and said to the servant:
+
+"There's a hundred and fifty dollars in dust, there, and I'll give it to
+you to let me kiss the child!"
+
+That anecdote is true.
+
+But see how things change. Sitting at that dinner-table, listening to
+that anecdote, if I had offered double the money for the privilege of
+kissing the same child, I would have been refused. Seventeen added years
+have far more than doubled the price.
+
+And while upon this subject I will remark that once in Star City, in the
+Humboldt Mountains, I took my place in a sort of long, post-office single
+file of miners, to patiently await my chance to peep through a crack in
+the cabin and get a sight of the splendid new sensation--a genuine, live
+Woman! And at the end of half of an hour my turn came, and I put my eye
+to the crack, and there she was, with one arm akimbo, and tossing
+flap-jacks in a frying-pan with the other.
+
+And she was one hundred and sixty-five [Being in calmer mood, now, I
+voluntarily knock off a hundred from that.--M.T.] years old, and hadn't a
+tooth in her head.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LVIII.
+
+For a few months I enjoyed what to me was an entirely new phase of
+existence--a butterfly idleness; nothing to do, nobody to be responsible
+to, and untroubled with financial uneasiness. I fell in love with the
+most cordial and sociable city in the Union. After the sage-brush and
+alkali deserts of Washoe, San Francisco was Paradise to me. I lived at
+the best hotel, exhibited my clothes in the most conspicuous places,
+infested the opera, and learned to seem enraptured with music which
+oftener afflicted my ignorant ear than enchanted it, if I had had the
+vulgar honesty to confess it. However, I suppose I was not greatly worse
+than the most of my countrymen in that. I had longed to be a butterfly,
+and I was one at last. I attended private parties in sumptuous evening
+dress, simpered and aired my graces like a born beau, and polkad and
+schottisched with a step peculiar to myself--and the kangaroo. In a
+word, I kept the due state of a man worth a hundred thousand dollars
+(prospectively,) and likely to reach absolute affluence when that
+silver-mine sale should be ultimately achieved in the East. I spent
+money with a free hand, and meantime watched the stock sales with an
+interested eye and looked to see what might happen in Nevada.
+
+Something very important happened. The property holders of Nevada voted
+against the State Constitution; but the folks who had nothing to lose
+were in the majority, and carried the measure over their heads. But
+after all it did not immediately look like a disaster, though
+unquestionably it was one I hesitated, calculated the chances, and then
+concluded not to sell. Stocks went on rising; speculation went mad;
+bankers, merchants, lawyers, doctors, mechanics, laborers, even the very
+washerwomen and servant girls, were putting up their earnings on silver
+stocks, and every sun that rose in the morning went down on paupers
+enriched and rich men beggared. What a gambling carnival it was! Gould
+and Curry soared to six thousand three hundred dollars a foot! And then
+--all of a sudden, out went the bottom and everything and everybody went
+to ruin and destruction! The wreck was complete.
+
+The bubble scarcely left a microscopic moisture behind it. I was an
+early beggar and a thorough one. My hoarded stocks were not worth the
+paper they were printed on. I threw them all away. I, the cheerful
+idiot that had been squandering money like water, and thought myself
+beyond the reach of misfortune, had not now as much as fifty dollars when
+I gathered together my various debts and paid them. I removed from the
+hotel to a very private boarding house. I took a reporter's berth and
+went to work. I was not entirely broken in spirit, for I was building
+confidently on the sale of the silver mine in the east. But I could not
+hear from Dan. My letters miscarried or were not answered.
+
+One day I did not feel vigorous and remained away from the office. The
+next day I went down toward noon as usual, and found a note on my desk
+which had been there twenty-four hours. It was signed "Marshall"--the
+Virginia reporter--and contained a request that I should call at the
+hotel and see him and a friend or two that night, as they would sail for
+the east in the morning. A postscript added that their errand was a big
+mining speculation! I was hardly ever so sick in my life. I abused
+myself for leaving Virginia and entrusting to another man a matter I
+ought to have attended to myself; I abused myself for remaining away from
+the office on the one day of all the year that I should have been there.
+And thus berating myself I trotted a mile to the steamer wharf and
+arrived just in time to be too late. The ship was in the stream and
+under way.
+
+I comforted myself with the thought that may be the speculation would
+amount to nothing--poor comfort at best--and then went back to my
+slavery, resolved to put up with my thirty-five dollars a week and forget
+all about it.
+
+A month afterward I enjoyed my first earthquake. It was one which was
+long called the "great" earthquake, and is doubtless so distinguished
+till this day. It was just after noon, on a bright October day. I was
+coming down Third street. The only objects in motion anywhere in sight
+in that thickly built and populous quarter, were a man in a buggy behind
+me, and a street car wending slowly up the cross street. Otherwise, all
+was solitude and a Sabbath stillness. As I turned the corner, around a
+frame house, there was a great rattle and jar, and it occurred to me that
+here was an item!--no doubt a fight in that house. Before I could turn
+and seek the door, there came a really terrific shock; the ground seemed
+to roll under me in waves, interrupted by a violent joggling up and down,
+and there was a heavy grinding noise as of brick houses rubbing together.
+I fell up against the frame house and hurt my elbow. I knew what it was,
+now, and from mere reportorial instinct, nothing else, took out my watch
+and noted the time of day; at that moment a third and still severer shock
+came, and as I reeled about on the pavement trying to keep my footing,
+I saw a sight! The entire front of a tall four-story brick building in
+Third street sprung outward like a door and fell sprawling across the
+street, raising a dust like a great volume of smoke! And here came the
+buggy--overboard went the man, and in less time than I can tell it the
+vehicle was distributed in small fragments along three hundred yards of
+street.
+
+One could have fancied that somebody had fired a charge of chair-rounds
+and rags down the thoroughfare. The street car had stopped, the horses
+were rearing and plunging, the passengers were pouring out at both ends,
+and one fat man had crashed half way through a glass window on one side
+of the car, got wedged fast and was squirming and screaming like an
+impaled madman. Every door, of every house, as far as the eye could
+reach, was vomiting a stream of human beings; and almost before one could
+execute a wink and begin another, there was a massed multitude of people
+stretching in endless procession down every street my position commanded.
+Never was solemn solitude turned into teeming life quicker.
+
+Of the wonders wrought by "the great earthquake," these were all that
+came under my eye; but the tricks it did, elsewhere, and far and wide
+over the town, made toothsome gossip for nine days.
+
+The destruction of property was trifling--the injury to it was
+wide-spread and somewhat serious.
+
+The "curiosities" of the earthquake were simply endless. Gentlemen and
+ladies who were sick, or were taking a siesta, or had dissipated till a
+late hour and were making up lost sleep, thronged into the public streets
+in all sorts of queer apparel, and some without any at all. One woman
+who had been washing a naked child, ran down the street holding it by the
+ankles as if it were a dressed turkey. Prominent citizens who were
+supposed to keep the Sabbath strictly, rushed out of saloons in their
+shirt-sleeves, with billiard cues in their hands. Dozens of men with
+necks swathed in napkins, rushed from barber-shops, lathered to the eyes
+or with one cheek clean shaved and the other still bearing a hairy
+stubble. Horses broke from stables, and a frightened dog rushed up a
+short attic ladder and out on to a roof, and when his scare was over had
+not the nerve to go down again the same way he had gone up.
+
+A prominent editor flew down stairs, in the principal hotel, with nothing
+on but one brief undergarment--met a chambermaid, and exclaimed:
+
+"Oh, what shall I do! Where shall I go!"
+
+She responded with naive serenity:
+
+"If you have no choice, you might try a clothing-store!"
+
+A certain foreign consul's lady was the acknowledged leader of fashion,
+and every time she appeared in anything new or extraordinary, the ladies
+in the vicinity made a raid on their husbands' purses and arrayed
+themselves similarly. One man who had suffered considerably and growled
+accordingly, was standing at the window when the shocks came, and the
+next instant the consul's wife, just out of the bath, fled by with no
+other apology for clothing than--a bath-towel! The sufferer rose
+superior to the terrors of the earthquake, and said to his wife:
+
+"Now that is something like! Get out your towel my dear!"
+
+The plastering that fell from ceilings in San Francisco that day, would
+have covered several acres of ground. For some days afterward, groups of
+eyeing and pointing men stood about many a building, looking at long
+zig-zag cracks that extended from the eaves to the ground. Four feet of
+the tops of three chimneys on one house were broken square off and turned
+around in such a way as to completely stop the draft.
+
+A crack a hundred feet long gaped open six inches wide in the middle of
+one street and then shut together again with such force, as to ridge up
+the meeting earth like a slender grave. A lady sitting in her rocking
+and quaking parlor, saw the wall part at the ceiling, open and shut
+twice, like a mouth, and then-drop the end of a brick on the floor like a
+tooth. She was a woman easily disgusted with foolishness, and she arose
+and went out of there. One lady who was coming down stairs was
+astonished to see a bronze Hercules lean forward on its pedestal as if to
+strike her with its club. They both reached the bottom of the flight at
+the same time,--the woman insensible from the fright. Her child, born
+some little time afterward, was club-footed. However--on second
+thought,--if the reader sees any coincidence in this, he must do it at
+his own risk.
+
+The first shock brought down two or three huge organ-pipes in one of the
+churches. The minister, with uplifted hands, was just closing the
+services. He glanced up, hesitated, and said:
+
+"However, we will omit the benediction!"--and the next instant there was
+a vacancy in the atmosphere where he had stood.
+
+After the first shock, an Oakland minister said:
+
+"Keep your seats! There is no better place to die than this"--
+
+And added, after the third:
+
+"But outside is good enough!" He then skipped out at the back door.
+
+Such another destruction of mantel ornaments and toilet bottles as the
+earthquake created, San Francisco never saw before. There was hardly a
+girl or a matron in the city but suffered losses of this kind. Suspended
+pictures were thrown down, but oftener still, by a curious freak of the
+earthquake's humor, they were whirled completely around with their faces
+to the wall! There was great difference of opinion, at first, as to the
+course or direction the earthquake traveled, but water that splashed out
+of various tanks and buckets settled that. Thousands of people were made
+so sea-sick by the rolling and pitching of floors and streets that they
+were weak and bed-ridden for hours, and some few for even days
+afterward.--Hardly an individual escaped nausea entirely.
+
+The queer earthquake--episodes that formed the staple of San Francisco
+gossip for the next week would fill a much larger book than this, and so
+I will diverge from the subject.
+
+By and by, in the due course of things, I picked up a copy of the
+Enterprise one day, and fell under this cruel blow:
+
+ NEVADA MINES IN NEW YORK.--G. M. Marshall, Sheba Hurs and Amos H.
+ Rose, who left San Francisco last July for New York City, with ores
+ from mines in Pine Wood District, Humboldt County, and on the Reese
+ River range, have disposed of a mine containing six thousand feet
+ and called the Pine Mountains Consolidated, for the sum of
+ $3,000,000. The stamps on the deed, which is now on its way to
+ Humboldt County, from New York, for record, amounted to $3,000,
+ which is said to be the largest amount of stamps ever placed on one
+ document. A working capital of $1,000,000 has been paid into the
+ treasury, and machinery has already been purchased for a large
+ quartz mill, which will be put up as soon as possible. The stock in
+ this company is all full paid and entirely unassessable. The ores
+ of the mines in this district somewhat resemble those of the Sheba
+ mine in Humboldt. Sheba Hurst, the discoverer of the mines, with
+ his friends corralled all the best leads and all the land and timber
+ they desired before making public their whereabouts. Ores from
+ there, assayed in this city, showed them to be exceedingly rich in
+ silver and gold--silver predominating. There is an abundance of
+ wood and water in the District. We are glad to know that New York
+ capital has been enlisted in the development of the mines of this
+ region. Having seen the ores and assays, we are satisfied that the
+ mines of the District are very valuable--anything but wild-cat.
+
+Once more native imbecility had carried the day, and I had lost a
+million! It was the "blind lead" over again.
+
+Let us not dwell on this miserable matter. If I were inventing these
+things, I could be wonderfully humorous over them; but they are too true
+to be talked of with hearty levity, even at this distant day. [True, and
+yet not exactly as given in the above figures, possibly. I saw Marshall,
+months afterward, and although he had plenty of money he did not claim to
+have captured an entire million. In fact I gathered that he had not then
+received $50,000. Beyond that figure his fortune appeared to consist of
+uncertain vast expectations rather than prodigious certainties. However,
+when the above item appeared in print I put full faith in it, and
+incontinently wilted and went to seed under it.] Suffice it that I so
+lost heart, and so yielded myself up to repinings and sighings and
+foolish regrets, that I neglected my duties and became about worthless,
+as a reporter for a brisk newspaper. And at last one of the proprietors
+took me aside, with a charity I still remember with considerable respect,
+and gave me an opportunity to resign my berth and so save myself the
+disgrace of a dismissal.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LIX.
+
+For a time I wrote literary screeds for the Golden Era. C. H. Webb had
+established a very excellent literary weekly called the Californian, but
+high merit was no guaranty of success; it languished, and he sold out to
+three printers, and Bret Harte became editor at $20 a week, and I was
+employed to contribute an article a week at $12. But the journal still
+languished, and the printers sold out to Captain Ogden, a rich man and a
+pleasant gentleman who chose to amuse himself with such an expensive
+luxury without much caring about the cost of it. When he grew tired of
+the novelty, he re-sold to the printers, the paper presently died a
+peaceful death, and I was out of work again. I would not mention these
+things but for the fact that they so aptly illustrate the ups and downs
+that characterize life on the Pacific coast. A man could hardly stumble
+into such a variety of queer vicissitudes in any other country.
+
+For two months my sole occupation was avoiding acquaintances; for during
+that time I did not earn a penny, or buy an article of any kind, or pay
+my board. I became a very adept at "slinking." I slunk from back street
+to back street, I slunk away from approaching faces that looked familiar,
+I slunk to my meals, ate them humbly and with a mute apology for every
+mouthful I robbed my generous landlady of, and at midnight, after
+wanderings that were but slinkings away from cheerfulness and light, I
+slunk to my bed. I felt meaner, and lowlier and more despicable than the
+worms. During all this time I had but one piece of money--a silver ten
+cent piece--and I held to it and would not spend it on any account, lest
+the consciousness coming strong upon me that I was entirely penniless,
+might suggest suicide. I had pawned every thing but the clothes I had
+on; so I clung to my dime desperately, till it was smooth with handling.
+
+However, I am forgetting. I did have one other occupation beside that of
+"slinking." It was the entertaining of a collector (and being
+entertained by him,) who had in his hands the Virginia banker's bill for
+forty-six dollars which I had loaned my schoolmate, the "Prodigal." This
+man used to call regularly once a week and dun me, and sometimes oftener.
+He did it from sheer force of habit, for he knew he could get nothing.
+He would get out his bill, calculate the interest for me, at five per
+cent a month, and show me clearly that there was no attempt at fraud in
+it and no mistakes; and then plead, and argue and dun with all his might
+for any sum--any little trifle--even a dollar--even half a dollar, on
+account. Then his duty was accomplished and his conscience free. He
+immediately dropped the subject there always; got out a couple of cigars
+and divided, put his feet in the window, and then we would have a long,
+luxurious talk about everything and everybody, and he would furnish me a
+world of curious dunning adventures out of the ample store in his memory.
+By and by he would clap his hat on his head, shake hands and say briskly:
+
+"Well, business is business--can't stay with you always!"--and was off in
+a second.
+
+The idea of pining for a dun! And yet I used to long for him to come,
+and would get as uneasy as any mother if the day went by without his
+visit, when I was expecting him. But he never collected that bill, at
+last nor any part of it. I lived to pay it to the banker myself.
+
+Misery loves company. Now and then at night, in out-of-the way, dimly
+lighted places, I found myself happening on another child of misfortune.
+He looked so seedy and forlorn, so homeless and friendless and forsaken,
+that I yearned toward him as a brother. I wanted to claim kinship with
+him and go about and enjoy our wretchedness together. The drawing toward
+each other must have been mutual; at any rate we got to falling together
+oftener, though still seemingly by accident; and although we did not
+speak or evince any recognition, I think the dull anxiety passed out of
+both of us when we saw each other, and then for several hours we would
+idle along contentedly, wide apart, and glancing furtively in at home
+lights and fireside gatherings, out of the night shadows, and very much
+enjoying our dumb companionship.
+
+Finally we spoke, and were inseparable after that. For our woes were
+identical, almost. He had been a reporter too, and lost his berth, and
+this was his experience, as nearly as I can recollect it. After losing
+his berth he had gone down, down, down, with never a halt: from a
+boarding house on Russian Hill to a boarding house in Kearney street;
+from thence to Dupont; from thence to a low sailor den; and from thence
+to lodgings in goods boxes and empty hogsheads near the wharves. Then;
+for a while, he had gained a meagre living by sewing up bursted sacks of
+grain on the piers; when that failed he had found food here and there as
+chance threw it in his way. He had ceased to show his face in daylight,
+now, for a reporter knows everybody, rich and poor, high and low, and
+cannot well avoid familiar faces in the broad light of day.
+
+This mendicant Blucher--I call him that for convenience--was a splendid
+creature. He was full of hope, pluck and philosophy; he was well read
+and a man of cultivated taste; he had a bright wit and was a master of
+satire; his kindliness and his generous spirit made him royal in my eyes
+and changed his curb-stone seat to a throne and his damaged hat to a
+crown.
+
+He had an adventure, once, which sticks fast in my memory as the most
+pleasantly grotesque that ever touched my sympathies. He had been
+without a penny for two months. He had shirked about obscure streets,
+among friendly dim lights, till the thing had become second nature to
+him. But at last he was driven abroad in daylight. The cause was
+sufficient; he had not tasted food for forty-eight hours, and he could
+not endure the misery of his hunger in idle hiding. He came along a back
+street, glowering at the loaves in bake-shop windows, and feeling that he
+could trade his life away for a morsel to eat. The sight of the bread
+doubled his hunger; but it was good to look at it, any how, and imagine
+what one might do if one only had it.
+
+Presently, in the middle of the street he saw a shining spot--looked
+again--did not, and could not, believe his eyes--turned away, to try
+them, then looked again. It was a verity--no vain, hunger-inspired
+delusion--it was a silver dime!
+
+He snatched it--gloated over it; doubted it--bit it--found it genuine
+--choked his heart down, and smothered a halleluiah. Then he looked
+around--saw that nobody was looking at him--threw the dime down where it
+was before--walked away a few steps, and approached again, pretending he
+did not know it was there, so that he could re-enjoy the luxury of
+finding it. He walked around it, viewing it from different points; then
+sauntered about with his hands in his pockets, looking up at the signs
+and now and then glancing at it and feeling the old thrill again.
+Finally he took it up, and went away, fondling it in his pocket. He
+idled through unfrequented streets, stopping in doorways and corners to
+take it out and look at it. By and by he went home to his lodgings--an
+empty queens-ware hogshead,--and employed himself till night trying to
+make up his mind what to buy with it. But it was hard to do. To get the
+most for it was the idea. He knew that at the Miner's Restaurant he
+could get a plate of beans and a piece of bread for ten cents; or a
+fish-ball and some few trifles, but they gave "no bread with one
+fish-ball" there. At French Pete's he could get a veal cutlet, plain,
+and some radishes and bread, for ten cents; or a cup of coffee--a pint at
+least--and a slice of bread; but the slice was not thick enough by the
+eighth of an inch, and sometimes they were still more criminal than that
+in the cutting of it. At seven o'clock his hunger was wolfish; and still
+his mind was not made up. He turned out and went up Merchant street,
+still ciphering; and chewing a bit of stick, as is the way of starving
+men.
+
+He passed before the lights of Martin's restaurant, the most aristocratic
+in the city, and stopped. It was a place where he had often dined, in
+better days, and Martin knew him well. Standing aside, just out of the
+range of the light, he worshiped the quails and steaks in the show
+window, and imagined that may be the fairy times were not gone yet and
+some prince in disguise would come along presently and tell him to go in
+there and take whatever he wanted. He chewed his stick with a hungry
+interest as he warmed to his subject. Just at this juncture he was
+conscious of some one at his side, sure enough; and then a finger touched
+his arm. He looked up, over his shoulder, and saw an apparition--a very
+allegory of Hunger! It was a man six feet high, gaunt, unshaven, hung
+with rags; with a haggard face and sunken cheeks, and eyes that pleaded
+piteously. This phantom said:
+
+"Come with me--please."
+
+He locked his arm in Blucher's and walked up the street to where the
+passengers were few and the light not strong, and then facing about, put
+out his hands in a beseeching way, and said:
+
+"Friend--stranger--look at me! Life is easy to you--you go about, placid
+and content, as I did once, in my day--you have been in there, and eaten
+your sumptuous supper, and picked your teeth, and hummed your tune, and
+thought your pleasant thoughts, and said to yourself it is a good world
+--but you've never suffered! You don't know what trouble is--you don't
+know what misery is--nor hunger! Look at me! Stranger have pity on a
+poor friendless, homeless dog! As God is my judge, I have not tasted
+food for eight and forty hours!--look in my eyes and see if I lie! Give
+me the least trifle in the world to keep me from starving--anything
+--twenty-five cents! Do it, stranger--do it, please. It will be nothing
+to you, but life to me. Do it, and I will go down on my knees and lick
+the dust before you! I will kiss your footprints--I will worship the
+very ground you walk on! Only twenty-five cents! I am famishing
+--perishing--starving by inches! For God's sake don't desert me!"
+
+Blucher was bewildered--and touched, too--stirred to the depths. He
+reflected. Thought again. Then an idea struck him, and he said:
+
+"Come with me."
+
+He took the outcast's arm, walked him down to Martin's restaurant, seated
+him at a marble table, placed the bill of fare before him, and said:
+
+"Order what you want, friend. Charge it to me, Mr. Martin."
+
+"All right, Mr. Blucher," said Martin.
+
+Then Blucher stepped back and leaned against the counter and watched the
+man stow away cargo after cargo of buckwheat cakes at seventy-five cents
+a plate; cup after cup of coffee, and porter house steaks worth two
+dollars apiece; and when six dollars and a half's worth of destruction
+had been accomplished, and the stranger's hunger appeased, Blucher went
+down to French Pete's, bought a veal cutlet plain, a slice of bread, and
+three radishes, with his dime, and set to and feasted like a king!
+
+Take the episode all around, it was as odd as any that can be culled from
+the myriad curiosities of Californian life, perhaps.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER LX.
+
+By and by, an old friend of mine, a miner, came down from one of the
+decayed mining camps of Tuolumne, California, and I went back with him.
+We lived in a small cabin on a verdant hillside, and there were not five
+other cabins in view over the wide expanse of hill and forest. Yet a
+flourishing city of two or three thousand population had occupied this
+grassy dead solitude during the flush times of twelve or fifteen years
+before, and where our cabin stood had once been the heart of the teeming
+hive, the centre of the city. When the mines gave out the town fell into
+decay, and in a few years wholly disappeared--streets, dwellings, shops,
+everything--and left no sign. The grassy slopes were as green and smooth
+and desolate of life as if they had never been disturbed. The mere
+handful of miners still remaining, had seen the town spring up spread,
+grow and flourish in its pride; and they had seen it sicken and die, and
+pass away like a dream. With it their hopes had died, and their zest of
+life. They had long ago resigned themselves to their exile, and ceased
+to correspond with their distant friends or turn longing eyes toward
+their early homes. They had accepted banishment, forgotten the world and
+been forgotten of the world. They were far from telegraphs and
+railroads, and they stood, as it were, in a living grave, dead to the
+events that stirred the globe's great populations, dead to the common
+interests of men, isolated and outcast from brotherhood with their kind.
+It was the most singular, and almost the most touching and melancholy
+exile that fancy can imagine.--One of my associates in this locality, for
+two or three months, was a man who had had a university education; but
+now for eighteen years he had decayed there by inches, a bearded,
+rough-clad, clay-stained miner, and at times, among his sighings and
+soliloquizings, he unconsciously interjected vaguely remembered Latin and
+Greek sentences--dead and musty tongues, meet vehicles for the thoughts
+of one whose dreams were all of the past, whose life was a failure; a
+tired man, burdened with the present, and indifferent to the future; a
+man without ties, hopes, interests, waiting for rest and the end.
+
+In that one little corner of California is found a species of mining
+which is seldom or never mentioned in print. It is called "pocket
+mining" and I am not aware that any of it is done outside of that little
+corner. The gold is not evenly distributed through the surface dirt, as
+in ordinary placer mines, but is collected in little spots, and they are
+very wide apart and exceedingly hard to find, but when you do find one
+you reap a rich and sudden harvest. There are not now more than twenty
+pocket miners in that entire little region. I think I know every one of
+them personally. I have known one of them to hunt patiently about the
+hill-sides every day for eight months without finding gold enough to make
+a snuff-box--his grocery bill running up relentlessly all the time--and
+then find a pocket and take out of it two thousand dollars in two dips of
+his shovel. I have known him to take out three thousand dollars in two
+hours, and go and pay up every cent of his indebtedness, then enter on a
+dazzling spree that finished the last of his treasure before the night
+was gone. And the next day he bought his groceries on credit as usual,
+and shouldered his pan and shovel and went off to the hills hunting
+pockets again happy and content. This is the most fascinating of all the
+different kinds of mining, and furnishes a very handsome percentage of
+victims to the lunatic asylum.
+
+Pocket hunting is an ingenious process. You take a spadeful of earth
+from the hill-side and put it in a large tin pan and dissolve and wash it
+gradually away till nothing is left but a teaspoonful of fine sediment.
+Whatever gold was in that earth has remained, because, being the
+heaviest, it has sought the bottom. Among the sediment you will find
+half a dozen yellow particles no larger than pin-heads. You are
+delighted. You move off to one side and wash another pan. If you find
+gold again, you move to one side further, and wash a third pan. If you
+find no gold this time, you are delighted again, because you know you are
+on the right scent.
+
+You lay an imaginary plan, shaped like a fan, with its handle up the
+hill--for just where the end of the handle is, you argue that the rich
+deposit lies hidden, whose vagrant grains of gold have escaped and been
+washed down the hill, spreading farther and farther apart as they
+wandered. And so you proceed up the hill, washing the earth and
+narrowing your lines every time the absence of gold in the pan shows that
+you are outside the spread of the fan; and at last, twenty yards up the
+hill your lines have converged to a point--a single foot from that point
+you cannot find any gold. Your breath comes short and quick, you are
+feverish with excitement; the dinner-bell may ring its clapper off, you
+pay no attention; friends may die, weddings transpire, houses burn down,
+they are nothing to you; you sweat and dig and delve with a frantic
+interest--and all at once you strike it! Up comes a spadeful of earth
+and quartz that is all lovely with soiled lumps and leaves and sprays of
+gold. Sometimes that one spadeful is all--$500. Sometimes the nest
+contains $10,000, and it takes you three or four days to get it all out.
+The pocket-miners tell of one nest that yielded $60,000 and two men
+exhausted it in two weeks, and then sold the ground for $10,000 to a
+party who never got $300 out of it afterward.
+
+The hogs are good pocket hunters. All the summer they root around the
+bushes, and turn up a thousand little piles of dirt, and then the miners
+long for the rains; for the rains beat upon these little piles and wash
+them down and expose the gold, possibly right over a pocket. Two pockets
+were found in this way by the same man in one day. One had $5,000 in it
+and the other $8,000. That man could appreciate it, for he hadn't had a
+cent for about a year.
+
+In Tuolumne lived two miners who used to go to the neighboring village in
+the afternoon and return every night with household supplies. Part of
+the distance they traversed a trail, and nearly always sat down to rest
+on a great boulder that lay beside the path. In the course of thirteen
+years they had worn that boulder tolerably smooth, sitting on it. By and
+by two vagrant Mexicans came along and occupied the seat. They began to
+amuse themselves by chipping off flakes from the boulder with a
+sledge-hammer. They examined one of these flakes and found it rich with
+gold. That boulder paid them $800 afterward. But the aggravating
+circumstance was that these "Greasers" knew that there must be more gold
+where that boulder came from, and so they went panning up the hill and
+found what was probably the richest pocket that region has yet produced.
+It took three months to exhaust it, and it yielded $120,000. The two
+American miners who used to sit on the boulder are poor yet, and they
+take turn about in getting up early in the morning to curse those
+Mexicans--and when it comes down to pure ornamental cursing, the native
+American is gifted above the sons of men.
+
+I have dwelt at some length upon this matter of pocket mining because it
+is a subject that is seldom referred to in print, and therefore I judged
+that it would have for the reader that interest which naturally attaches
+to novelty.
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Roughing It, Part 6.
+by Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens)
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