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+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 78183 ***
+
+
+ “_Familiar in their Mouths as HOUSEHOLD WORDS._”—SHAKESPEARE.
+
+
+
+
+ HOUSEHOLD WORDS.
+ A WEEKLY JOURNAL.
+
+
+ CONDUCTED BY CHARLES DICKENS.
+
+
+ N^{o.} 18.] SATURDAY, JULY 27, 1850. [PRICE 2_d._
+
+
+
+
+ A DETECTIVE POLICE PARTY.
+
+
+In pursuance of the intention mentioned at the close of a former paper
+on “The Modern Science of Thief-taking,” we now proceed to endeavour to
+convey to our readers some faint idea of the extraordinary dexterity,
+patience, and ingenuity, exercised by the Detective Police. That our
+description may be as graphic as we can render it, and may be perfectly
+reliable, we will make it, so far as in us lies, a piece of plain truth.
+And first, we have to inform the reader how the anecdotes we are about
+to communicate, came to our knowledge.
+
+We are not by any means devout believers in the Old Bow-Street Police.
+To say the truth, we think there was a vast amount of humbug about those
+worthies. Apart from many of them being men of very indifferent
+character, and far too much in the habit of consorting with thieves and
+the like, they never lost a public occasion of jobbing and trading in
+mystery and making the most of themselves. Continually puffed besides by
+incompetent magistrates anxious to conceal their own deficiencies, and
+hand-in-glove with the penny-a-liners of that time, they became a sort
+of superstition. Although as a Preventive Police they were utterly
+ineffective, and as a Detective Police were very loose and uncertain in
+their operations, they remain with some people, a superstition to the
+present day.
+
+On the other hand, the Detective Force organised since the establishment
+of the existing Police, is so well chosen and trained, proceeds so
+systematically and quietly, does its business in such a workman-like
+manner, and is always so calmly and steadily engaged in the service of
+the public, that the public really do not know enough of it, to know a
+tithe of its usefulness. Impressed with this conviction, and interested
+in the men themselves, we represented to the authorities at Scotland
+Yard, that we should be glad, if there were no official objection, to
+have some talk with the Detectives. A most obliging and ready permission
+being given, a certain evening was appointed with a certain Inspector
+for a social conference between ourselves and the Detectives, at our
+Office in Wellington Street, Strand, London. In consequence of which
+appointment the party “came off,” which we are about to describe. And we
+beg to repeat that, avoiding such topics as it might for obvious reasons
+be injurious to the public, or disagreeable to respectable individuals,
+to touch upon in print, our description is as exact as we can make it.
+
+The reader will have the goodness to imagine the Sanctum Sanctorum of
+Household Words. Anything that best suits the reader’s fancy, will best
+represent that magnificent chamber. We merely stipulate for a round
+table in the middle, with some glasses and cigars arranged upon it; and
+the editorial sofa elegantly hemmed in between that stately piece of
+furniture and the wall.
+
+It is a sultry evening at dusk. The stones of Wellington Street are hot
+and gritty, and the watermen and hackney-coachmen at the Theatre
+opposite, are much flushed and aggravated. Carriages are constantly
+setting down the people who have come to Fairy-Land; and there is a
+mighty shouting and bellowing every now and then, deafening us for the
+moment, through the open windows.
+
+Just at dusk, Inspectors Wield and Stalker are announced; but we do not
+undertake to warrant the orthography of any of the names here mentioned.
+Inspector Wield presents Inspector Stalker. Inspector Wield is a
+middle-aged man of a portly presence, with a large, moist, knowing eye,
+a husky voice, and a habit of emphasising his conversation by the aid of
+a corpulent fore-finger, which is constantly in juxta-position with his
+eyes or nose. Inspector Stalker is a shrewd, hard-headed Scotchman—in
+appearance not at all unlike a very acute, thoroughly-trained
+schoolmaster, from the Normal Establishment at Glasgow. Inspector Wield
+one might have known, perhaps, for what he is—Inspector Stalker, never.
+
+The ceremonies of reception over, Inspectors Wield and Stalker observe
+that they have brought some sergeants with them. The sergeants are
+presented—five in number, Sergeant Dornton, Sergeant Witchem, Sergeant
+Mith, Sergeant Fendall, and Sergeant Straw. We have the whole Detective
+Force from Scotland Yard with one exception. They sit down in a
+semi-circle (the two Inspectors at the two ends) at a little distance
+from the round table, facing the editorial sofa. Every man of them, in a
+glance, immediately takes an inventory of the furniture and an accurate
+sketch of the editorial presence. The Editor feels that any gentleman in
+company could take him up, if need should be, without the smallest
+hesitation, twenty years hence.
+
+The whole party are in plain clothes. Sergeant Dornton, about fifty
+years of age, with a ruddy face and a high sun-burnt forehead, has the
+air of one who has been a Sergeant in the army—he might have sat to
+Wilkie for the Soldier in the Reading of the Will. He is famous for
+steadily pursuing the inductive process, and, from small beginnings,
+working on from clue to clue until he bags his man. Sergeant Witchem,
+shorter and thicker-set, and marked with the small pox, has something of
+a reserved and thoughtful air, as if he were engaged in deep
+arithmetical calculations. He is renowned for his acquaintance with the
+swell mob. Sergeant Mith, a smooth-faced man with a fresh bright
+complexion, and a strange air of simplicity, is a dab at housebreakers.
+Sergeant Fendall, a light-haired, well-spoken, polite person, is a
+prodigious hand at pursuing private inquiries of a delicate nature.
+Straw, a little wiry Sergeant of meek demeanour and strong sense, would
+knock at a door and ask a series of questions in any mild character you
+chose to prescribe to him, from a charity-boy upwards, and seem as
+innocent as an infant. They are, one and all, respectable-looking men;
+of perfectly good deportment and unusual intelligence; with nothing
+lounging or slinking in their manners; with an air of keen observation,
+and quick perception when addressed; and generally presenting in their
+faces, traces more or less marked of habitually leading lives of strong
+mental excitement. They have all good eyes; and they all can, and they
+all do, look full at whomsoever they speak to.
+
+We light the cigars, and hand round the glasses (which are very
+temperately used indeed), and the conversation begins by a modest
+amateur reference on the Editorial part to the swell mob. Inspector
+Wield immediately removes his cigar from his lips, waves his right hand,
+and says, “Regarding the Swell Mob, Sir, I can’t do better than call
+upon Sergeant Witchem. Because the reason why? I’ll tell you. Sergeant
+Witchem is better acquainted with the Swell Mob than any officer in
+London.”
+
+Our heart leaping up when we beheld this rainbow in the sky, we turn to
+Sergeant Witchem, who very concisely, and in well-chosen language, goes
+into the subject forthwith. Meantime, the whole of his brother officers
+are closely interested in attending to what he says, and observing its
+effect. Presently they begin to strike in, one or two together, when an
+opportunity offers, and the conversation becomes general. But these
+brother officers only come in to the assistance of each other—not to the
+contradiction—and a more amicable brotherhood there could not be. From
+the swell mob, we diverge to the kindred topics of cracksmen, fences,
+public-house dancers, area-sneaks, designing young people who go out
+“gonophing,” and other “schools,” to which our readers have already been
+introduced. It is observable throughout these revelations, that
+Inspector Stalker, the Scotchman, is always exact and statistical, and
+that when any question of figures arises, everybody as by one consent
+pauses, and looks to him.
+
+When we have exhausted the various schools of Art—during which
+discussion the whole body have remained profoundly attentive, except
+when some unusual noise at the Theatre over the way, has induced some
+gentleman to glance inquiringly towards the window in that direction,
+behind his next neighbour’s back—we burrow for information on such
+points as the following. Whether there really are any highway robberies
+in London, or whether some circumstances not convenient to be mentioned
+by the aggrieved party, usually precede the robberies complained of,
+under that head, which quite change their character? Certainly the
+latter, almost always. Whether in the case of robberies in houses, where
+servants are necessarily exposed to doubt, innocence under suspicion
+ever becomes so like guilt in appearance, that a good officer need be
+cautious how he judges it? Undoubtedly. Nothing is so common or
+deceptive as such appearances at first. Whether in a place of public
+amusement, a thief knows an officer, and an officer knows a
+thief,—supposing them, beforehand, strangers to each other—because each
+recognises in the other, under all disguise, an inattention to what is
+going on, and a purpose that is not the purpose of being entertained?
+Yes. That’s the way exactly. Whether it is reasonable or ridiculous to
+trust to the alleged experiences of thieves as narrated by themselves,
+in prisons, or penitentiaries, or anywhere? In general, nothing more
+absurd. Lying is their habit and their trade; and they would rather
+lie—even if they hadn’t an interest in it, and didn’t want to make
+themselves agreeable—than tell the truth.
+
+From these topics, we glide into a review of the most celebrated and
+horrible of the great crimes that have been committed within the last
+fifteen or twenty years. The men engaged in the discovery of almost all
+of them, and in the pursuit or apprehension of the murderers, are here,
+down to the very last instance. One of our guests gave chase to and
+boarded the Emigrant Ship, in which the murderess last hanged in London
+was supposed to have embarked. We learn from him that his errand was not
+announced to the passengers, who may have no idea of it to this hour.
+That he went below, with the captain, lamp in hand—it being dark, and
+the whole steerage abed and seasick—and engaged the Mrs. Manning who
+_was_ on board, in a conversation about her luggage, until she was, with
+no small pains, induced to raise her head, and turn her face towards the
+light. Satisfied that she was not the object of his search, he quietly
+re-embarked in the Government steamer alongside, and steamed home again
+with the intelligence.
+
+When we have exhausted these subjects, too, which occupy a considerable
+time in the discussion, two or three leave their chairs, whisper
+Sergeant Witchem, and resume their seats. Sergeant Witchem, leaning
+forward a little, and placing a hand on each of his legs, then modestly
+speaks as follows:
+
+“My brother officers wish me to relate a little account of my taking
+Tally-ho Thompson. A man oughtn’t to tell what he has done himself; but
+still, as nobody was with me, and, consequently, as nobody but myself
+can tell it, I’ll do it in the best way I can, if it should meet your
+approval.”
+
+We assure Sergeant Witchem that he will oblige us very much, and we all
+compose ourselves to listen with great interest and attention.
+
+“Tally-ho Thompson,” says Sergeant Witchem, after merely wetting his
+lips with his brandy-and-water, “Tally-ho Thompson was a famous
+horse-stealer, couper, and magsman. Thompson, in conjunction with a pal
+that occasionally worked with him, gammoned a countryman out of a good
+round sum of money, under pretence of getting him a situation—the
+regular old dodge—and was afterwards in the ‘Hue and Cry’ for a horse—a
+horse that he stole, down in Hertfordshire. I had to look after
+Thompson, and I applied myself, of course, in the first instance, to
+discovering where he was. Now, Thompson’s wife lived, along with a
+little daughter, at Chelsea. Knowing that Thompson was somewhere in the
+country, I watched the house—especially at post-time in the
+morning—thinking Thompson was pretty likely to write to her. Sure
+enough, one morning the postman comes up, and delivers a letter at Mrs.
+Thompson’s door. Little girl opens the door, and takes it in. We’re not
+always sure of postmen, though the people at the post-offices are always
+very obliging. A postman may help us, or he may not,—just as it happens.
+However, I go across the road, and I say to the postman, after he has
+left the letter, ‘Good morning! how are you?’ ‘How are _you_?’ says he.
+‘You’ve just delivered a letter for Mrs. Thompson.’ ‘Yes, I have.’ ‘You
+didn’t happen to remark what the post-mark was, perhaps?’ ‘No,’ says he,
+‘I didn’t.’ ‘Come,’ says I, ‘I’ll be plain with you. I’m in a small way
+of business, and I have given Thompson credit, and I can’t afford to
+lose what he owes me. I know he’s got money, and I know he’s in the
+country, and if you could tell me what the post-mark was, I should be
+very much obliged to you, and you’d do a service to a tradesman in a
+small way of business that can’t afford a loss.’ ‘Well,’ he said, ‘I do
+assure you that I did not observe what the post-mark was; all I know is,
+that there was money in the letter—I should say a sovereign.’ This was
+enough for me, because of course I knew that Thompson having sent his
+wife money, it was probable she’d write to Thompson, by return of post,
+to acknowledge the receipt. So I said ‘Thankee’ to the postman, and I
+kept on the watch. In the afternoon I saw the little girl come out. Of
+course I followed her. She went into a stationer’s shop, and I needn’t
+say to you that I looked in at the window. She bought some writing-paper
+and envelopes, and a pen. I think to myself, ‘That’ll do!’—watch her
+home again—and don’t go away, you may be sure, knowing that Mrs.
+Thompson was writing her letter to Tally-ho, and that the letter would
+be posted presently. In about an hour or so, out came the little girl
+again, with the letter in her hand. I went up, and said something to the
+child, whatever it might have been; but I couldn’t see the direction of
+the letter, because she held it with the seal upwards. However, I
+observed that on the back of the letter there was what we call a kiss—a
+drop of wax by the side of the seal—and again, you understand, that was
+enough for me. I saw her post the letter, waited till she was gone, then
+went into the shop, and asked to see the Master. When he came out, I
+told him, ‘Now, I’m an Officer in the Detective Force; there’s a letter
+with a kiss been posted here just now, for a man that I’m in search of;
+and what I have to ask of you, is, that you will let me look at the
+direction of that letter.’ He was very civil—took a lot of letters from
+the box in the window—shook ’em out on the counter with the faces
+downwards—and there among ’em was the identical letter with the kiss. It
+was directed, Mr. Thomas Pigeon, Post-Office, B——, to be left ’till
+called for. Down I went to B—— (a hundred and twenty miles or so) that
+night. Early next morning I went to the Post-Office; saw the gentleman
+in charge of that department; told him who I was; and that my object was
+to see, and track, the party that should come for the letter for Mr.
+Thomas Pigeon. He was very polite, and said, ‘You shall have every
+assistance we can give you; you can wait inside the office; and we’ll
+take care to let you know when anybody comes for the letter.’ Well, I
+waited there, three days, and began to think that nobody ever _would_
+come. At last the clerk whispered to me, ‘Here! Detective! Somebody’s
+come for the letter!’ ‘Keep him a minute,’ said I, and I ran round to
+the outside of the office. There I saw a young chap with the appearance
+of an Ostler, holding a horse by the bridle—stretching the bridle across
+the pavement, while he waited at the Post-Office Window for the letter.
+I began to pat the horse, and that; and I said to the boy, ‘Why, this is
+Mr. Jones’s Mare!’ ‘No. It an’t.’ ‘No?’ said I. ‘She’s very like Mr.
+Jones’s Mare!’ ‘She an’t Mr. Jones’s Mare, anyhow,’ says he. ‘It’s Mr.
+So-and-So’s, of the Warwick Arms.’ And up he jumped, and off he
+went—letter and all. I got a cab, followed on the box, and was so quick
+after him that I came into the stable-yard of the Warwick Arms, by one
+gate, just as he came in by another. I went into the bar, where there
+was a young woman serving, and called for a glass of brandy-and-water.
+He came in directly, and handed her the letter. She casually looked at
+it, without saying anything, and stuck it up behind the glass over the
+chimney-piece. What was to be done next?
+
+“I turned it over in my mind while I drank my brandy-and-water (looking
+pretty sharp at the letter the while), but I couldn’t see my way out of
+it at all. I tried to get lodgings in the house, but there had been a
+horse-fair, or something of that sort, and it was full. I was obliged to
+put up somewhere else, but I came backwards and forwards to the bar for
+a couple of days, and there was the letter, always behind the glass. At
+last I thought I’d write a letter to Mr. Pigeon myself, and see what
+that would do. So I wrote one, and posted it, but I purposely addressed
+it, Mr. John Pigeon, instead of Mr. Thomas Pigeon, to see what _that_
+would do. In the morning (a very wet morning it was) I watched the
+postman down the street, and cut into the bar, just before he reached
+the Warwick Arms. In he came presently with my letter. ‘Is there a Mr.
+John Pigeon staying here?’ ‘No!—stop a bit though,’ says the barmaid;
+and she took down the letter behind the glass. ‘No,’ says she, ‘it’s
+Thomas, and _he_ is not staying here. Would you do me a favor, and post
+this for me, as it is so wet?’ The postman said Yes; she folded it in
+another envelope, directed it, and gave it him. He put it in his hat,
+and away he went.
+
+“I had no difficulty in finding out the direction of that letter. It was
+addressed, Mr. Thomas Pigeon, Post-Office, R——, Northamptonshire, to be
+left till called for. Off I started directly for R——; I said the same at
+the Post-Office there, as I had said at B——; and again I waited three
+days before anybody came. At last another chap on horseback came. ‘Any
+letters for Mr. Thomas Pigeon?’ ‘Where do you come from?’ ‘New Inn, near
+R——.’ He got the letter, and away _he_ went—at a canter.
+
+“I made my enquiries about the New Inn, near R——, and hearing it was a
+solitary sort of house, a little in the horse line, about a couple of
+miles from the station, I thought I’d go and have a look at it. I found
+it what it had been described, and sauntered in, to look about me. The
+landlady was in the bar, and I was trying to get into conversation with
+her; asked her how business was, and spoke about the wet weather, and so
+on; when I saw, through an open door, three men sitting by the fire in a
+sort of parlor, or kitchen; and one of those men, according to the
+description I had of him, was Tally-ho Thompson!
+
+“I went and sat down among ’em, and tried to make things agreeable; but
+they were very shy—wouldn’t talk at all—looked at me, and at one
+another, in a way quite the reverse of sociable. I reckoned ’em up, and
+finding that they were all three bigger men than me, and considering
+that their looks were ugly—that it was a lonely place—railroad station
+two miles off—and night coming on—thought I couldn’t do better than have
+a drop of brandy-and-water to keep my courage up. So I called for my
+brandy-and-water; and as I was sitting drinking it by the fire, Thompson
+got up and went out.
+
+“Now the difficulty of it was, that I wasn’t sure it _was_ Thompson,
+because I had never set eyes on him before; and what I had wanted was to
+be quite certain of him. However, there was nothing for it now, but to
+follow, and put a bold face upon it. I found him talking, outside in the
+yard, with the landlady. It turned out afterwards, that he was wanted by
+a Northampton officer for something else, and that, knowing that officer
+to be pock-marked (as I am myself), he mistook me for him. As I have
+observed, I found him talking to the landlady, outside. I put my hand
+upon his shoulder—this way—and said, ‘Tally-ho Thompson, it’s no use. I
+know you. I’m an officer from London, and I take you into custody for
+felony!’ ‘That be d—d!’ says Tally-ho Thompson.
+
+“We went back into the house, and the two friends began to cut up rough,
+and their looks didn’t please me at all, I assure you. ‘Let the man go.
+What are you going to do with him?’ ‘I’ll tell you what I’m going to do
+with him. I’m going to take him to London to-night, as sure as I’m
+alive. I’m not alone here, whatever you may think. You mind your own
+business, and keep yourselves to yourselves. It’ll be better for you,
+for I know you both very well.’ _I_‘d never seen or heard of ’em in all
+my life, but my bouncing cowed ’em a bit, and they kept off, while
+Thompson was making ready to go. I thought to myself, however, that they
+might be coming after me on the dark road, to rescue Thompson; so I said
+to the landlady, ‘What men have you got in the house, Missis?’ ‘We
+haven’t got no men here,’ she says, sulkily. ‘You have got an ostler, I
+suppose?’ ‘Yes, we’ve got an ostler.’ ‘Let me see him.’ Presently he
+came, and a shaggy-headed young fellow he was. ‘Now attend to me, young
+man,’ says I; ‘I’m a Detective Officer from London. This man’s name is
+Thompson. I have taken him into custody for felony. I’m going to take
+him to the railroad station. I call upon you in the Queen’s name to
+assist me; and mind you, my friend, you’ll get yourself into more
+trouble than you know of, if you don’t!’ You never saw a person open his
+eyes so wide. ‘Now, Thompson, come along!’ says I. But when I took out
+the handcuffs, Thompson cries, ‘No! None of that! I won’t stand _them_!
+I’ll go along with you quiet, but I won’t bear none of that!’ ‘Tally-ho
+Thompson,’ I said, ‘I’m willing to behave as a man to you, if you are
+willing to behave as a man to me. Give me your word that you’ll come
+peaceably along, and I don’t want to handcuff you.’ ‘I will,’ says
+Thompson, ‘but I’ll have a glass of brandy first.’ ‘I don’t care if I’ve
+another,’ said I. ‘We’ll have two more, Missis,’ said the friends, ‘and
+con-found you, Constable, you’ll give your man a drop, won’t you?’ I was
+agreeable to that, so we had it all round, and then my man and I took
+Tally-ho Thompson safe to the railroad, and I carried him to London that
+night. He was afterwards acquitted, on account of a defect in the
+evidence; and I understand he always praises me up to the skies, and
+says I’m one of the best of men.”
+
+This story coming to a termination amidst general applause, Inspector
+Wield, after a little grave smoking, fixes his eye on his host, and thus
+delivers himself:
+
+“It wasn’t a bad plant that of mine, on Fikey, the man accused of
+forging the Sou’ Western Railway debentures—it was only t’other
+day—because the reason why? I’ll tell you.
+
+“I had information that Fikey and his brother kept a factory over yonder
+there,” indicating any region on the Surrey side of the river, “where he
+bought second-hand carriages; so after I’d tried in vain to get hold of
+him by other means, I wrote him a letter in an assumed name, saying that
+I’d got a horse and shay to dispose of, and would drive down next day,
+that he might view the lot, and make an offer—very reasonable it was, I
+said—a reg’lar bargain. Straw and me then went off to a friend of mine
+that’s in the livery and job business, and hired a turn-out for the day,
+a precious smart turn-out, it was—quite a slap-up thing! Down we drove,
+accordingly, with a friend (who’s not in the Force himself); and leaving
+my friend in the shay near a public-house, to take care of the horse, we
+went to the factory, which was some little way off. In the factory,
+there was a number of strong fellows at work, and after reckoning ’em
+up, it was clear to me that it wouldn’t do to try it on there. They were
+too many for us. We must get our man out of doors. ‘Mr. Fikey at home?’
+‘No, he ain’t.’ ‘Expected home soon?’ ‘Why, no, not soon.’ ‘Ah! is his
+brother here?’ ‘_I_’m his brother.’ ‘Oh! well, this is an
+ill-conwenience, this is. I wrote him a letter yesterday, saying I’d got
+a little turn-out to dispose of, and I’ve took the trouble to bring the
+turn-out down, a’ purpose, and now he ain’t in the way.’ ‘No, he an’t in
+the way. You couldn’t make it convenient to call again, could you?’
+‘Why, no, I couldn’t. I want to sell; that’s the fact; and I can’t put
+it off. Could you find him anywheres?’ At first he said No, he couldn’t,
+and then he wasn’t sure about it, and then he’d go and try. So, at last
+he went up-stairs, where there was a sort of loft, and presently down
+comes my man himself, in his shirt sleeves.
+
+“‘Well,’ he says, ‘this seems to be rayther a pressing matter of yours.’
+‘Yes,’ I says, ‘it _is_ rayther a pressing matter, and you’ll find it a
+bargain—dirt-cheap.’ ‘I ain’t in partickler want of a bargain just now,’
+he says, ‘but where is it!’ ‘Why,’ I says, ‘the turn-out’s just outside.
+Come and look at it.’ He hasn’t any suspicions, and away we go. And the
+first thing that happens is, that the horse runs away with my friend
+(who knows no more of driving than a child) when he takes a little trot
+along the road to show his paces. You never saw such a game in your
+life!
+
+“When the bolt is over, and the turn-out has come to a stand-still
+again, Fikey walks round and round it, as grave as a judge—me too.
+‘There, Sir!’ I says. ‘There’s a neat thing!’ ‘It an’t a bad style of
+thing,’ he says. ‘I believe you,’ says I. ‘And there’s a horse!’—for I
+saw him looking at it. ‘Rising eight!’ I says, rubbing his fore-legs.
+(Bless you, there an’t a man in the world knows less of horses than I
+do, but I’d heard my friend at the Livery Stables say he was eight year
+old, so I says, as knowing as possible, ‘Rising Eight.’) ‘Rising eight,
+is he?’ says he. ‘Rising eight,’ says I. ‘Well,’ he says, ‘what do you
+want for it?’ ‘Why, the first and last figure for the whole concern is
+five-and-twenty pound!’ ‘That’s very cheap!’ he says, looking at me.
+‘An’t it?’ I says. ‘I told you it was a bargain! Now, without any
+higgling and haggling about it, what I want is to sell, and that’s my
+price. Further, I’ll make it easy to you, and take half the money down,
+and you can do a bit of stiff[1] for the balance.’ ‘Well,’ he says
+again, ‘that’s very cheap.’ ‘I believe you,’ says I; ‘get in and try it,
+and you’ll buy it. Come! take a trial!’
+
+Footnote 1:
+
+ Give a bill.
+
+“Ecod, he gets in, and we get in, and we drive along the road, to show
+him to one of the railway clerks that was hid in the public-house window
+to identify him. But the clerk was bothered, and didn’t know whether it
+was him, or wasn’t—because the reason why? I’ll tell you,—on account of
+his having shaved his whiskers. ‘It’s a clever little horse,’ he says,
+‘and trots well; and the shay runs light.’ ‘Not a doubt about it,’ I
+says. ‘And now, Mr. Fikey, I may as well make it all right, without
+wasting any more of your time. The fact is, I’m Inspector Wield, and
+you’re my prisoner.’ ‘You don’t mean that?’ he says. ‘I do, indeed.’
+‘Then burn my body,’ says Fikey, ‘if this ain’t _too_ bad!’
+
+“Perhaps you never saw a man so knocked over with surprise. ‘I hope
+you’ll let me have my coat?’ he says. ‘By all means.’ ‘Well, then, let’s
+drive to the factory.’ ‘Why, not exactly that, I think,’ said I; ‘I’ve
+been there, once before, to-day. Suppose we send for it,’ He saw it was
+no go, so he sent for it, and put it on, and we drove him up to London,
+comfortable.”
+
+This reminiscence is in the height of its success, when a general
+proposal is made to the fresh-complexioned, smooth-faced officer, with
+the strange air of simplicity, to tell the “Butcher’s story.” But we
+must reserve the Butcher’s story, together with another not less curious
+in its way, for a concluding paper.
+
+
+
+
+ “SWINGING THE SHIP.”
+ A VISIT TO THE COMPASS OBSERVATORY.
+
+
+The noble ship with her floating battery of heavy guns, her hundreds of
+seamen, smart and brave, her powder, shot, and shell for destroying an
+enemy, and her tons of provender to supply her crew; with her anxious
+captain and aspiring lieutenants, mates, middys, warrant officers, and
+her pipeclayed marines are on board. The long pennon whips the winds;
+the hurry, bustle, and noise of preparation has subsided into the
+quietude of everything in its place; when the word passes that she is
+“Ready for Sea.”
+
+Next morning the newspapers find just a line and a half in their naval
+corner for the announcement,—“Her Majesty’s ship Unutterable, 120 guns,
+went out of harbour yesterday. After she has been swung, and had her
+compasses adjusted, she will sail for the Pacific.”
+
+“_Swing_ a hundred and twenty gun ship?” says the good citizen
+interrogatively to himself, as he devours his coffee and his newspaper
+at breakfast. He pays his taxes and is proud of Britannia and the
+British navy, but his admiration of the nautical does not help him to a
+solution. “After she has been swung!” he repeats, and then more
+immediate affairs draw off his attention, and he leaves the Unutterable
+to undergo the mysterious. He turns to the debates.
+
+Naval officers are of course more wise on the point, and some of them
+have more knowledge of the operation than liking for it. It’s apt to
+spoil the paint now and then, and gives trouble, and upsets some of
+their arrangements. Many, it must be confessed, have more experience
+than science in their composition, and when they let out their true
+feeling, indulge, perhaps, in a half growl, in which the words
+“new-fangled” and “deal of trouble” might be heard. But the operation
+goes on nevertheless, and little doubt but the toil is forgotten and the
+growl repented when—far, far at sea, a murky sky shuts out the sun and
+the stars, and forbids heaven to tell the navigator where he is—with a
+waste of waters, hundreds, perhaps thousands of miles around him, he has
+nought but his figures and his little trembling needles of magnetised
+iron to guide him on his way; to direct him wide of the sunken rock and
+the sandy shoal as he nears the wished-for coast.
+
+The loss of British ships by wreck has been stated at between five and
+six hundred in a year—or about “a ship and a half-a-day.” This terrible
+loss has been ascribed to many causes—to the tides and currents of the
+ocean; to imperfect logs; inaccurate charts; unsteady steerage;
+inattention to the lead; stress of weather; defective ships, and
+defective management; but last, if not greatest, says Captain Johnson,
+who gives this catalogue of sources of disaster, we have the errors of
+the compass. These errors were noticed—now nearly a couple of centuries
+ago, and from those days to the present time careful mariners have often
+called attention to the subject. “Officers in charge of convoys during
+the war,” continues Captain Johnson, “will probably remember the care
+with which the general signal was displayed at sunset, to steer a given
+course during the night,” with what alacrity that signal was repeated by
+the ships of war in their stations, and answered by every
+merchant-vessel in the fleet; and they will also possibly remember with
+what surprise,—nay, indignation,—they observed when daylight came,
+almost the entire convoy dispersed over the ocean as far as the eye
+could reach, and mayhap a suspicious looking stranger or two escorting
+those farthest away, further astray, in despite of all the shots fired
+during a morning watch to recall them. That such dispersements were in
+part attributable to the differences of the compasses in each ship,
+there can be no doubt; but the greatest delinquents in this particular,
+in all probability, were not the merchant vessels, but rather the ships
+of war; _the attractive power of their guns upon the compasses_ being
+now a well-known and constantly proved fact.
+
+The Apollo frigate, and forty merchantmen of her convoy, in 1803 were
+wrecked together on the coast of Portugal, when they believed themselves
+to be two hundred miles to the westward. The error of the frigate’s
+compasses is believed to have been the cause of the disaster; and a
+similar belief exists with respect to the dreadful wrecks of our line of
+battle ships on the coasts of Jutland and Holland in 1811. The wreck of
+the Reliance, Indiaman, on the coast of France, when one hundred and
+nine lives were lost, in 1842, is another painful accident ascribed to
+errors of the compasses induced by the presence on board of a large iron
+tank forty-six feet long, the attraction of which had been
+overlooked—for a hollow tank has a magnetic influence as great as a
+solid mass of the same external dimensions—and such a mass would weigh
+four hundred and sixty-eight tons.
+
+These errors in the needle that guides the ship, so dangerous in their
+results, at last attracted official attention in England. Inquiries were
+extended in various directions, and it was found that “in some ships the
+deviation was small; in others it was large enough to cause the loss of
+a ship, even during a short run; whilst in others, again, from the
+position of some iron stancheon, bolt or bar, or stand of arms, the
+error might be changed in the opposite direction; so that the deviation
+in one vessel was not a guide to its amount or direction in another; and
+that there was no other remedy but ascertaining the fact by direct
+experiment in each ship.” These facts were recognised by a committee of
+English officers, appointed to investigate the matter, one of whom was
+the Captain Johnson whom we have already quoted, and of whose subsequent
+labours we shall have further presently to speak.
+
+With these words of explanatory preface, let us set out on a visit to
+the establishment where the dangers of those afloat are sought to be
+lessened by scientific investigations on shore.
+
+About two miles and a half eastwards from the Greenwich Observatory, in
+the picturesque parish of Charlton, and on the extreme corner of the
+high land that runs from Blackheath, till it juts out close upon the
+banks of the Thames—stands the building we are in search of. Those who
+may try to discover it will probably find some little difficulty in the
+task, for the place is unpretending in outward aspect, and is little
+known in the neighbourhood; has never before been publicly
+described—except, perhaps, in those unread publications called Blue
+Books, and in the technical volume of the naval officer who has charge
+of this sanctum of science.
+
+It is called the Compass Observatory; and its locality may probably be
+more completely indicated by saying that it is not very distant from,
+though on a far higher level than that corner of the Woolwich Dockyard
+whence the great chimney soars up like a rival monument to that on Fish
+Street Hill, and where the engine that sets the Dockyard Machines in
+motion hums like a bee of forty-horse power. When the place is reached,
+those who expect to see “a public building,” will be disappointed; those
+who like to find that Science may abide in small and humble places, will
+be pleased. A long strip of newly-reclaimed land, a detached brick
+house, and in its rear, an octagonal wooden structure of little greater
+outward pretensions than a citizen’s “summer house,” make up the whole
+establishment.
+
+Passing under the pleasant shade of two fine oak trees, and then between
+a collection of very promising roses, we enter the house. Once inside,
+we see that the spirit of order, regularity, and neatness, is there
+paramount. The exactitude requisite for scientific observation, gives a
+habit of exactness in other things. In one room we perceive a galvanic
+battery ready for experiments; a disc of iron for showing a now defunct
+mode of steadying the vibrations of the compass; a specimen of the mixed
+iron and wood braced together as they are now employed in the
+construction of first-class ships of the Royal Navy, like the Queen’s
+Yacht; and more, interesting than all the rest, a copper bowl, contrived
+by Arago, for stilling the irritability (so to speak) of the magnetic
+needle.
+
+The French astronomer and ex-minister of the Provisional Government here
+claims our admiration of his scientific skill, and his work suggests the
+reflexion how much more pleasant the calm pursuit of nature’s laws must
+be to such a man, than the turbulent effort to enact rules and
+constitutions for an impetuous and changeable people. Passing from this
+room to another, we find books, and charts, and maps, on which are laid
+down the magnetic currents over the great oceans, and amongst its
+instrumental relics, a magnetic needle that belonged to poor Captain
+Cook. It is a plain small bar of steel in a rough wooden case, but to
+the mariner who loves his craft and its heroes, this morsel of iron has
+an interest greater than the most perfect of nautical inventions—for
+Cook was a seaman who achieved great ends with humble means and from
+humble beginnings. A third room is full of compasses of all sorts,
+sizes, and kinds, from China, from Denmark, from France; from the most
+rude and simple, to the most complex and finished. All the schemes and
+plans ever proposed for improving this useful invention are here
+preserved. Many of the contrivances have been discovered more than once.
+A sanguine theorist completes what to him is perfectly new. Certain that
+he is to be immortalised and enriched, he sets off to the Observatory
+with his treasure, to reveal his grand secret, and receive the
+anticipated reward. He is shown into the compass-room, and there,—horror
+of horrors,—upon the table, amidst a host of others, there is an old
+discarded instrument the very counterpart of his own! It was made, and
+tried, and discarded, years ago.
+
+From the main brick building we pass through another line of roses, and
+under a bower, boasting some fifty different varieties of that charming
+flower, to the wooden structure in the rear, which is, in fact, the
+Observatory.
+
+This building is entirely free from iron. It is approached by stone
+steps; the door has a pure copper lock, which being opened by a copper
+key, swings on copper hinges to admit the visitor after he has first
+cleared the dirt from his shoes upon a copper scraper. Nearly facing the
+door is a stove to keep up the temperature in cold weather. It looks
+black enough, and has a black funnel. When the visitor is told that
+Captain Johnson has his coat-buttons carefully made without any iron
+shank concealed under their silken cover; and that his assistant, Mr.
+Brunton, repudiates buttons to his jacket altogether, and has pockets
+guiltless of a knife; he is apt to turn to the stove, and hint the
+presence there of the forbidden metal.
+
+“Ah, ah!” is the reply, it looks like iron sure enough; but the
+fireplace, the chimney, the poker, the shovel, are all alike. Nothing
+but copper, copper, pure copper. This suggests an anecdote. When the
+operations in this Compass Observatory were first commenced, there was
+found to be a small variation in the magnet. The instruments were
+readjusted; their character was investigated, their construction
+re-examined; other observations were made—but still the variation
+continued. Pockets were searched for knives; the garden looked over to
+see that no stray spade or rake had been left outside the building, yet
+near enough for mischief. Nothing could be discovered. At length the
+_brass_ bolt on the window was suspected; and though brass had a good
+character, not being thought capable of coaxing the magnet from its
+truth, it was, in despair of finding any other delinquent, unscrewed
+from its position. No sooner was this done, than the wayward needle
+returned to its true position; the brass bolt was ejected in disgrace,
+and no morsel of the brazen metal has since been allowed to show itself
+within the precincts of the building sacred to the mysterious fluid that
+draws the iron needle to the North.
+
+Once inside the Observatory, the first impression is one of isolation
+and quietude. Look up to the wooden roof, and you see two shutters, to
+be opened when an observation is to be made upon a star. Through the
+floor rise three pedestals of masonry, built solidly from the earth, and
+isolated from the Observatory floor, so that no vibration may be
+communicated to them. All three stand in a row, running north and south.
+The object of two of them is to support with complete steadiness and
+truth two instruments for determining, at any moment of time, the exact
+magnetic north, whilst the third pedestal holds one by one the compasses
+brought there to be tested. The most northern of these three narrow
+stone tables is, in fact, a bed of trial—a place of ordeal—whilst the
+other two support the instrumental judges, who are to pass sentence upon
+the fluttering needles brought under their unyielding gaze. The test is
+a severe one. It is easy, with proper means, to get the true magnetic
+north with a fixed instrument on shore, but to make something that shall
+tell it with equal truth upon the deck of a ship, as it heaves and
+tosses, and plunges on the sea, is a very different thing. Yet,
+instruments equal to such triumphs of skill are obtained, and in this
+place it is that their qualities are first investigated. The south
+pedestal has upon it a tall tube of glass, within which there hang some
+long fibres of untwisted silk, supporting a magnetic tube so beautifully
+poised, that it obeys without let or hindrance its natural tendency
+towards the magnetic north. This tubular magnet has at one end a glass
+on which a scale and figures are engraved, but so fine and small as to
+be with difficulty seen by the naked eye. The second pedestal supports a
+telescope, with which the observer looks down the tubular throat of the
+magnet towards this tiny scale on the glass at its extremity. Our
+friends, the “spiders,” have contributed some lines to the telescope,
+and the centre one of these crosses the exact figure showing the
+magnetic position at the moment.
+
+With this figure in his mind, the telescope and the observer’s eye are
+poised in the opposite direction, through the window of the Observatory,
+towards a spot some half mile to the north, called Cox’s Mount; an
+eminence on which a wall has been raised to bear a numbered scale
+similar to that on the magnet—with this difference—that the one is very
+minute, and the other very large. To the corresponding figure on the
+distant wall the instrument is directed, and being thus pointed towards
+the true magnetic north, it is brought to bear upon the pivot of the
+compass—which by this time occupies a place on the top of the third
+pedestal to be tested. Without a complex description, and the free use
+of scientific terms, it would be perhaps impossible to convey a
+thoroughly exact conception of the steps of the whole process. Such a
+detail would be not only too technical, but unnecessary, here. It will
+be enough in general terms to say, therefore, that the indication
+obtained from a star, or from the instrument on the south pedestal,
+called the collimator, is, by means of the instrument in the centre,
+combined with a mark upon a distant object, and then brought down to
+prove the true powers of the compass placed on the third pedestal. It is
+a beautifully exact operation. The silence of isolation, the steadiness
+of stone tables and practised operators, the most beautifully
+constructed instruments, are combined to ensure accurate realities as a
+result. The tests are so varied, and so often repeated, that no error
+can escape, and the compass, when it leaves the building to begin its
+adventures afloat, commences its career with an irreproachable character
+as a Standard Compass of the Royal Navy—to be, on board the ship of war
+to which it is sent, a kind of master instrument of reference, by which
+ruder and cheaper compasses may be checked and regulated.
+
+Just as the history of the stars and of the variations of the magnet is
+registered and posted up at the Greenwich Observatory, so is that of the
+compasses entered up here. Every compass that passes its examination may
+be said to receive its commission, and be appointed to a ship. Its
+number is taken; its vessel and destination are noted, and,
+subsequently, its length of service. On its return home from successive
+trips, it comes back to this place, when its character is again
+investigated and note made of any loss of magnetic power, of any
+deviations it may have exhibited, how it may have lost and how gained,
+and of any other circumstances showing either improvement or
+deterioration. Now and then one is blacklisted, but this seldom happens;
+the greatest loss yet noted being 30 minutes. The Standard Compasses
+cost, when made new, with tripod and all complete, 25_l._ each. After
+they have been some years in service afloat, they are sent into hospital
+for overhaul and repair. This costs generally 4_l._ or 5_l._, and they
+are then again as good as ever, and ready to guide another ship on her
+way over the mighty waters. The scientific part of the fittings of a
+ship of war, though of greatest value, are thus of lowest cost. A
+Standard Compass is, indeed, a beautiful result of human ingenuity.
+Generations of seamen and men of science have discussed the best form
+and materials, and the best mode of suspending the needle, that it may
+most freely and truly follow its mysterious love for the north. From the
+days of the old adventurers round the globe, to the date of the last
+voyages to the Arctic regions, successive sea captains have thought, and
+watched, and suggested, and the Standard Compass of the English Navy
+combines, it is believed, all that is best in all their thinking. After
+the Observatory was established, and one of its duties had been defined
+to be to pursue investigations on the deviation of the needle, it was
+thought desirable to have specimens of the instruments used in the war
+ships of other naval nations. With the open liberality that unites in
+brotherhood the scientific men of all countries, France and Denmark sent
+specimens of what their best men had succeeded in perfecting for the use
+of their navies. These instruments are very good, and attract deserved
+attention in the observatory-collection of specimens. The Frenchman is
+scientific, simple, and with an excellent contrivance for a moveable
+agate plane to avoid friction in the motion of the needle. The Dane is a
+good substantial instrument, even more excellently finished than the
+compasses issued to our navy.
+
+The English Compass is, however, believed with good reason to be the
+best yet contrived. It has grown up to its present excellence by slow
+degrees. Human ingenuity has been taxed to its utmost, and it has passed
+to its present perfection through the various trials of needles of all
+sorts of shapes swung in all sorts of ways, and by springs, and floating
+cards, modifying the instrument to the varying conditions of a small
+boat tossing on waves, or a line of battle ship jarring under the recoil
+of a broadside. And now we find our Compass-needle made of iron that,
+being got from the Swedish mines, has travelled to Strasbourg to be
+prepared for clock springs; thence to Paris, to be still more highly
+wrought by the watchmaker; and then to London, to take its sea-going
+shape. Four bars of this choice metal, or of shear-steel of equally fine
+quality, are ranged edgewise under a card, thickened and stiffened yet
+kept transparent by a sheet of mica, brought from the Russian mines;
+this card moves upon a point made of a metal harder than steel, and
+incapable of corrosion; and which sometimes, under the name of Iridium,
+but more correctly under that of “native alloy,” is found by the
+refiners as they smelt the platinum and silver gained from the Ural
+Mountains or the mines of Spain. The Iridium or alloy comes to the
+workshop in the tiniest of glass bottles—bottles as small round as a
+goose-quill, and about an inch long—in morsels not much bigger than a
+pin’s head, and weighing each less than half a grain. Some of these
+prove too soft, some too spongy, some too brittle, but at last one is
+found hard and good, and it is soldered upon the pivot, that, when
+sharpened and polished, is to work upon a cap, formed of a ruby, brought
+from the East. A bowl of the metal suggested by the French philosopher
+being prepared, from the produce of the mines of Cornwall; and the
+science of the English philosopher, and the skill of the English
+workman, having brought all these things into their proper shape and
+places; we have, as the result, the Standard Compass, whose fitness to
+guide her Majesty’s ship the Unutterable, we have just seen tested by
+Captain Johnson at the Woolwich Compass Observatory.
+
+Our favourite newspaper has just stated that that gallant ship “is now
+at Greenhithe waiting to have her compasses adjusted.” So, then, the
+instruments so accurate at the Observatory a few days ago, are all wrong
+again on shipboard. Just so. The moment they get to their places afloat,
+their fidelity to the north wavers,—in one ship more, in another less;
+but in all in a greater or smaller degree in proportion to the quantity
+of iron used in the construction of the vessel, and the nearness of that
+metal to the compasses; in proportion to the number of the iron guns and
+the total weight of metal carried; to the length of the funnel in
+steamships, and to the condition of that funnel whether upright or
+hauled down. All this is both new and strange enough. We have learnt
+already what loss of ships convoyed and ships wrecked has arisen from
+these deviations: deviations long neglected on board all vessels and to
+this hour unrecognised or unattended to in our mercantile marine! Since
+the Royal Navy, however, has a scientific officer, Captain Johnson,
+especially employed in attending to the important duty of adjusting the
+compasses: let us go with him and his assistant, Mr. Brunton, from the
+Compass Observatory to the anchorage at Greenhithe, and see how he will
+“swing” the gallant line of battle ship, the Unutterable.
+
+The trip occupies a very short time, for we have steam at command.
+Arrived in the Reach, we find five floating buoys anchored in the
+stream, one forming a centre, and four being disposed at equal distances
+about it, just as the five pips are placed upon a card—say the five of
+spades. The good ship to be operated upon is already fast by the head to
+the centre buoy, and Captain Johnson having mounted her deck, and his
+assistant, Mr. Brunton, having been rowed ashore, a rope is run out from
+the ship’s stern and made fast to one of the corner buoys. The Standard
+Compass being fixed in the proper position which it is to occupy in the
+ship, neither too high nor too low, and the guns and other iron being
+round about it, as they are to remain during the voyage, the mooring
+ropes are adjusted, and the ship’s head is put due north. Meanwhile, Mr.
+Brunton has set up a compass ashore, and all being ready, Captain
+Johnson, at a given moment, observes the bearing of a distant object—the
+Tower at Shooter’s Hill—noting the bearing of the needle on board. At
+that instant the pennant that floated at the mast-head is hauled down
+from the truck. This being the concerted signal, at the same second of
+time the assistant ashore observed the needle of his compass. The two
+instruments vary, and the deviation of that on board, compared with that
+ashore, is due to the iron of the ship. The stern ropes are hauled from
+one buoy to another, and again made fast, the ship’s head now pointing
+in another direction. The observations and the signals are repeated.
+Each deviation of the ship’s compass is carefully noted upon a card
+previously prepared for the purpose. The ship’s stern is then hauled
+round to the third outside buoy, and the compasses being again examined,
+she is next hauled round to the fourth buoy. Her head by this time has
+been north, east, south, west; on each point the deviations of her
+compasses have been tested, noted, and the card shows their character
+and proper adjustment. _The ship has been swung._ Science has done its
+best for her, and the word is given to heave anchor, for she is now
+truly “Ready for Sea.”
+
+
+
+
+ AN EXPLORING ADVENTURE.
+
+
+The Litany of a Bushman on the Borders might well run, “From native
+dogs, from scabby sheep, from blacks, from droughts, from governors’
+proclamations, good Lord, deliver us.”
+
+The droughts come in their appointed season, and the day will be, when
+wells and tanks and aqueducts will redeem many a part from the curse of
+periodical barrenness: the blacks soon tame or fade before the white
+man’s face; unfortunately the seat of the native dogs, and home-bred or
+town-bred governing crotchets are more plentiful in long settled than
+new found countries. At any rate, I have experienced them all, and now
+give the following passage of my life for the benefit of the gentlemen
+“who live at home at ease,” hatching theories for our good—Heaven help
+their silliness!
+
+I had been two years comfortably settled with a nice lot of cattle and
+sheep, part my own, part on “thirds,” when the people south of me began
+to complain of drought. _I_ had enough feed and water; the question was,
+whether it would last.
+
+I called my bullock-driver, Bald-faced Dick, into consultation. He was
+laid up at the time with a broken leg. Dick strongly advised looking for
+a new station “to the nor’ard.”
+
+The sheep would do for months, but he thought we were overstocked with
+cattle. I had a good deal of confidence in Dick’s judgment; for he was a
+“first fleeter,” that is, came over with Governor Phillips in the first
+fleet; had seen everything in the colony, both good and bad; had, it was
+whispered, in early years fled from a flogging master, and lived, some
+said, with the blacks; others averred with a party of Gully-rakers
+(cattle-stealers); he swore horridly, was dangerous when he had drunk
+too much rum, but was a thorough Bushman; by the stars, or by sun, and
+the fall of the land, could find his way anywhere by day or night,
+understood all kinds of stock, and could make bullocks understand him.
+He knew every roving character in the colony, the quality of every
+station, and more about the far interior than he chose to tell to every
+one. With all his coarseness, he was generous and good-natured, and when
+well paid, and fairly and strictly treated, stood upon “Bush honour,”
+and could be thoroughly depended on.
+
+Having had an opportunity of serving him in a rather serious matter
+previous to his entering my service, I was pretty sure of his best
+advice.
+
+The end of it was, for a promise of five pounds he obtained from a
+friend of his a description of a country hitherto unsettled, and
+first-rate for cattle. These men, who can neither read nor write, have
+often a talent for description, which is astonishing.
+
+Having heard a minute detail of the “pack,” and studied a sort of map
+drawn on the lid of a tea-chest with a burned stick, I decided on
+exploring with my overseer, Jem Carden, and, if successful, returning
+for the cattle and drags, all loaded for founding a station.
+
+We only took our guns and tomahawks, with tea, sugar, a salt tongue, and
+small damper ready baked, being determined to make long marches,
+starting early, camping at mid-day, and marching again in the evening as
+long as it was light.
+
+Our first stage was only twenty-five miles to young Marson’s
+cattle-station. Marson was a cadet, of a noble family, and having been
+too fast at home and in India as a cavalry subaltern, had been sent out
+with a fair capital to Australia, under the idea that a fortune was to
+be had for asking, and no means of expense open in the Bush. What money
+he did not leave in the bars and billiard rooms of Sydney, he invested
+in a herd of six hundred cattle; to look after these, he had four men,
+whom he engaged, one because he could fight, another because he could
+sing, and all because they flattered him. With these fellows he lived
+upon terms of perfect equality, with a keg of rum continually on the
+tap. Then, for want of better society, he made his hut the rendezvous of
+a tribe of tame blacks.
+
+We found him sitting on the floor in a pair of trowsers and ragged
+shirt, unwashed, uncombed, pale-faced and red-eyed, surrounded by
+half-a-dozen black gins (his sultanas), a lot of dogs, poultry, a tame
+kangaroo, and two of his men. The floor was littered with quart pots,
+lumps of fat, and damper outside the hut; the relations of the black
+ladies had made a fire, and were cooking a piece of a fine young heifer.
+What with the jabbering of the gins, the singing and swearing of the
+men, and the yelping of the dogs, it was no place for a quiet meal, so
+we only stayed long enough to drink a pot of tea, so as not to offend,
+and passed on to camp an hour under the shade of a thicket near the
+river.
+
+Marson having, with the assistance of his black friends, consumed all
+his stock, has returned home; and, I hear, asserts everywhere that
+Australia is not a country a gentleman can live in.
+
+Our course next, after crossing the dividing range, lay over a very flat
+country, all burned up as far as the eye could reach,—a perfect desert
+of sand. The chain of pools which formed the river after rain, were
+nearly choked up by the putrifying carcases of cattle, smothered in
+fighting for water. The air was poisonous; the horses sank fetlock-deep
+at every stride; the blazing sun was reflected back from the hot sand
+with an intensity that almost blinded our half-shut eyes. After three
+hours of this misery, we struck into a better country, and soon after
+came up to the camp of a squatter, who had been forced forward by the
+drought. He had marked out about twenty miles along the river for his
+run,—a pretty good slice, I thought, when, before turning back, he said,
+“That is all I want.” It was no business of ours, as we had views
+further a-field. For three days we pushed on, making from thirty to
+forty miles a day, without seeing anything exactly to our mind. We rode
+over arid plains, dotted with scrubby brushwood, then up precipitous
+hills; now leaping, now clambering down and up, and now riding round to
+avoid dry gullies and ravines; passing occasionally breaks of green
+pasture, but insufficiently watered for my purpose. Sometimes our way
+lay along mountain sides, sometimes in the dry bed of a torrent.
+Sometimes huge boulders interrupted our course, sometimes the gigantic
+trunks of fallen trees. More than once we had to steer through a forest
+of the monotonous, shadeless gum, with its lofty, dazzlingly white
+trunks festooned with the brown, curly bark of the previous year, and
+its parasol-like but shadeless branches, where crimson, green, and snowy
+parrot tribes shrieked and whistled among the evergreen leaves. It is
+impossible to conceive anything more gorgeous than these birds as they
+fluttered in the sun; but I confess that, “on serious thoughts intent,”
+during this journey, they were more often associated with my ideas of
+supper than anything else.
+
+The evening of the third day, we found ourselves obliged to camp down
+with a scanty supply of brackish water, and no signs of any living
+thing. The next day was worse; a land of silence and desolation, where
+it seemed as if mountains had been crumbled up and scattered about in
+hills and lumps. The dry earth cracked and yawned in all directions.
+Failing to find water, we camped down, parched, weary, silent, but not
+despairing.
+
+The next morning the horses were gone.
+
+I cannot find words to describe what we suffered in the subsequent
+twelve hours. I had walked until my feet were one mass of blisters, and
+was ready to lie down and die ten times in the day; but somehow I found
+strength to walk, always chewing a bullet. At length, at nightfall, we
+found our horses; and, nearly at the same time, to crown our
+delight—water. At the sight of this, we both involuntarily sank down on
+our knees to return thanks for life saved.
+
+The next morning, after a scanty breakfast, we set to work, and by dint
+of cutting away with axe and jack-knife, at the expense of clothes and
+skin, through a brigalow scrub for half a mile, found our way into a gap
+through which our track lay, and which we had missed. It led straight to
+the dividing range.
+
+After crossing five miles from the foot of the range, through a barren
+tract, our eyes and hearts were suddenly rejoiced by the sight of the
+wished-for land.
+
+A plain, covered with fine green barley-grass, as high as our horses’
+heads, and sprinkled over with the myal shrub, which cattle and sheep
+will eat and thrive on, even without grass. Such was the delicious
+prospect before us. A flood had evidently but lately subsided, for
+lagoons full of water were scattered all about; a river running at the
+rate of five miles an hour, serpentined as far as the eye could see,
+from which the water-fowl fluttered up as we passed; the eagle hawks
+were sweeping along after flocks of quail, and mobs of kangaroos hopping
+about like huge rabbits. There was not a sign of horn or hoof anywhere,
+but it was evident the aborigines were numerous, for there were paths
+worn down where they had been in the habit of travelling, from one angle
+of the river to another; we could trace their footmarks and of all
+sizes, and thereupon we unslung our guns and looked at the priming.
+Altogether I thought I had discovered the finest place for a
+cattle-station in the colony; I found out afterwards that the first
+appearance of a new country before it has been stocked is not to be
+depended on.
+
+We formed a camp in an angle of the river, so as to have protection on
+three sides, ventured, in spite of the danger, to light a fire and cook
+some game. Oh, how delicious was that meal! As I lay near the river’s
+edge, peeping through the tall grass, I saw the horrid emus, that rare
+and soon to be extinct bird, come down the slopes on the opposite side
+to drink in numbers; a sure sign that white men were as yet strangers to
+these plains.
+
+We spent some days in examination, and during the exploration met with
+adventures with the aborigines, I will not now relate. Having marked a
+station with my initials, and in returning made out a route practicable
+for drays, by which I afterwards made my way with a large herd of
+cattle, although not without enduring more than I could tell in a few
+lines.
+
+Our horses having picked up their flesh in a fortnight’s spell on the
+green plains, we got back at a rattling pace, but, before arriving home,
+met with an adventure I shall not soon forget. It was at the first
+station we reached after crossing the “barrens” that divided our newly
+discovered country. A hut had just been built for the Stockman, a big
+strong Irishman, more than six feet high, a regular specimen of a
+Tipperary chicken. He had been entertaining us with characteristic
+hospitality; and we were smoking our pipes round the fire, when the
+hut-keeper rushed in without his hat, crying—
+
+“Tom! Tom! the blacks are coming down on us, all armed, as hard as they
+can run. Shut the door! for Heaven’s sake shut the door!” Tom banged it
+to, and put his shoulder against it, while the keeper was pulling up the
+bar, and Carden and I were getting the lock-cases off our fire-arms.
+Unfortunately the door was made roughly of green wood, and had shrunk,
+leaving gaps between the slabs.
+
+In the mean time about thirty blacks hurled a volley of spears that made
+the walls ring again; and then advancing boldly up, one of them thrust a
+double-jagged spear through the door, slap into Tom’s throat. My back
+was turned towards him, being busy putting a fresh cap on my carbine. I
+heard his cry, and, turning, saw him fall into the arms of the
+hut-keeper. I thrust the barrel of my piece through a hole against a
+black devil, and fired at the same moment that my man did. The two
+dropped; the rest retreated, but turned back, and caught up their dead
+friends. Carden flung open the door again, and gave them the contents of
+his other barrel. My black put the hut-keeper’s musket into my hand; I
+gave them a charge of buckshot. Three more fell, and the rest, dropping
+their friends, disappeared across the river. All this was the work of a
+moment. We then turned our attention to the stock-keeper. The spear had
+entered at the chin, and come out on the other side three or four
+inches. There was not a great flow of blood, but he was evidently
+bleeding inwardly. He was perfectly collected, and said he was quite
+sure he should die.
+
+We cut the end of the spear short off, but did not dare to take it out.
+The hut-keeper got on a horse, leading another, and rode for a doctor
+who lived one hundred and fifty miles off; he never stopped except to
+give the horses a feed two or three times in the whole distance, but
+when he reached his journey’s end, the doctor was out. In the mean time
+poor Tom made his will, disposing of a few head of cattle, mare and
+foal, and also signed a sort of dying testament to the effect that he
+had never wronged any of the blacks in any way. The weather was very
+hot, mortification came on, and he died in agony two days after
+receiving his wound.
+
+The outrage was reported to the Commissioner, but no notice was taken of
+it although we were paying a tax for Border Police at the time.
+
+Not many years have elapsed since we fought for our lives—since I read
+the burial service over the poor murdered Stockman. A handsome
+verandah’d villa now stands in the place of the slab hut; yellow corn
+waves over the Irishman’s grave, and while cattle and sheep abound, as
+well white men, women, and children, there is not a wild black within
+two hundred miles.
+
+
+
+
+ THE BIRTH OF MORNING.
+
+
+ Pure, calm, diffused, the twilight of the morn
+ Is in the glen, among the dewy leaves.
+ Its gentle radiance, more heavenly-born
+ Than the half-loving sunbeam, never grieves
+ A nook, unvisited. This Earth receives
+ The light which makes no shade, as the caress
+ Of God on his creation, and upheaves
+ Her soft face, innocent with peace, to bless,
+ Babe-like, his watchful eye with waking tenderness.
+
+ A gate admits us to the Hill we seek;
+ Through woods a track upon the turf we find;
+ The trees are dripping dew, their tall stems creak
+ And rub together when the morning wind
+ Lightly caresses them. We pause to mind
+ The note of one awakened bird, whose cry,
+ Quaint and repeated, is not like its kind.
+ Our ears are ignorant. Now up the high
+ And mossy slope we climb, beneath an open sky.
+
+ We reach the summit. Earth is in a dream
+ Of misty seas, and islands strangely born—
+ The unreal, from reality. The stream
+ Of wraith-like sights which, ere he can be torn
+ From peaceful sleep, delights the travel-worn
+ At slumber’s painted gate, is not more wild
+ Than the imagining of Earth when Morn
+ Bids her awaken. So a dreaming child
+ Looks through white angel wings, and sees all undefiled.
+
+ The blessed dream-land fancy of the young,
+ More truthful than the reasoning of age,
+ Is like this vision of the morning, sprung
+ Of earth and air. These lines upon the page
+ Of Nature have life in them. They assuage
+ The fevers of the world, they are the dew
+ Of calm,—and God is calm. How mortals wage
+ Their wars of weakness Light reveals to view;
+ Reason fights through the false, but Fancy feels the true.
+
+
+
+
+ AN EXCELLENT OPPORTUNITY.
+
+
+In one of the dirtiest and most gloomy streets leading to the Rue Saint
+Denis, in Paris, there stands a tall and ancient house, the lower
+portion of which is a large mercer’s shop. This establishment is held to
+be one of the very best in the neighbourhood, and has for many years
+belonged to an individual on whom we will bestow the name of Ramin.
+
+About ten years ago, Monsieur Ramin was a jovial red-faced man of forty,
+who joked his customers into purchasing his goods, flattered the pretty
+_grisettes_ outrageously, and now and then gave them a Sunday treat at
+the barrier, as the cheapest way of securing their custom. Some people
+thought him a careless, good-natured fellow, and wondered how, with his
+off-hand ways, he contrived to make money so fast, but those who knew
+him well saw that he was one of those who “never lost an opportunity.”
+Others declared that Monsieur Ramin’s own definition of his character
+was, that he was a “_bon enfant_,” and that “it was all luck.” He
+shrugged his shoulders and laughed when people hinted at his deep
+scheming in making, and his skill in taking advantage of Excellent
+Opportunities.
+
+He was sitting in his gloomy parlour one fine morning in Spring,
+breakfasting from a dark liquid honoured with the name of onion soup,
+glancing at the newspaper, and keeping a vigilant look on the shop
+through the open door, when his old servant Catherine suddenly observed:
+
+“I suppose you know Monsieur Bonelle has come to live in the vacant
+apartment on the fourth floor?”
+
+“What!” exclaimed Monsieur Ramin in a loud key.
+
+Catherine repeated her statement, to which her master listened in total
+silence.
+
+“Well!” he said, at length, in his most careless tones; “what about the
+old fellow?” and he once more resumed his triple occupation of reading,
+eating, and watching.
+
+“Why,” continued Catherine, “they say he is nearly dying, and that his
+housekeeper, Marguerite, vowed he could never get up-stairs alive. It
+took two men to carry him up; and when he was at length quiet in bed,
+Marguerite went down to the porter’s lodge and sobbed there a whole
+hour, saying, Her poor master, had the gout, the rheumatics, and a bad
+asthma; that though he had been got up-stairs, he would never come down
+again alive; that if she could only get him to confess his sins and make
+his will, she would not mind it so much; but that when she spoke of the
+lawyer or the priest, he blasphemed at her like a heathen, and declared
+he would live to bury her and every body else.”
+
+Monsieur Ramin heard Catherine with great attention, forgot to finish
+his soup, and remained for five minutes in profound rumination, without
+so much as perceiving two customers who had entered the shop and were
+waiting to be served. When aroused, he was heard to exclaim:
+
+“What an excellent opportunity!”
+
+Monsieur Bonelle had been Ramin’s predecessor. The succession of the
+latter to the shop was a mystery. No one ever knew how it was that this
+young and poor assistant managed to replace his patron. Some said that
+he had detected Monsieur Bonelle in frauds which he threatened to
+expose, unless the business were given up to him as the price of his
+silence; others averred that, having drawn a prize in the lottery, he
+had resolved to set up a fierce opposition over the way, and that
+Monsieur Bonelle, having obtained a hint of his intentions, had thought
+it most prudent to accept the trifling sum his clerk offered, and avoid
+a ruinous competition. Some charitable souls—moved no doubt by Monsieur
+Bonelle’s misfortune—endeavoured to console and pump him; but all they
+could get from him was the bitter exclamation, “To think I should have
+been duped by _him_!” For Ramin had the art, though then a mere youth,
+to pass himself off on his master as an innocent provincial lad. Those
+who sought an explanation from the new mercer, were still more
+unsuccessful. “My good old master,” he said in his jovial way, “felt in
+need of repose, and so I obligingly relieved him of all business and
+botheration.”
+
+Years passed away; Ramin prospered, and neither thought nor heard of his
+“good old master.” The house, of which he tenanted the lower portion,
+was offered for sale: he had long coveted it, and had almost concluded
+an agreement with the actual owner, when Monsieur Bonelle unexpectedly
+stepped in at the eleventh hour, and by offering a trifle more secured
+the bargain. The rage and mortification of Monsieur Ramin were extreme.
+He could not understand how Bonelle, whom he had thought ruined, had
+scraped up so large a sum; his lease was out, and he now felt himself at
+the mercy of the man he had so much injured. But either Monsieur Bonelle
+was free from vindictive feelings, or those feelings did not blind him
+to the expediency of keeping a good tenant; for though he raised the
+rent, until Monsieur Ramin groaned inwardly, he did not refuse to renew
+the lease. They had met at that period; but never since.
+
+“Well, Catherine,” observed Monsieur Ramin to his old servant, on the
+following morning, “How is that good Monsieur Bonelle getting on?”
+
+“I dare say you feel very uneasy about him,” she replied with a sneer.
+
+Monsieur Ramin looked up and frowned.
+
+“Catherine,” said he, dryly, “you will have the goodness, in the first
+place, not to make impertinent remarks; in the second place, you will
+oblige me by going up-stairs to inquire after the health of Monsieur
+Bonelle, and say that I sent you.”
+
+Catherine grumbled, and obeyed. Her master was in the shop, when she
+returned in a few minutes, and delivered with evident satisfaction the
+following gracious message:
+
+“Monsieur Bonelle desires his compliments to you, and declines to state
+how he is; he will also thank you to attend to your own shop, and not to
+trouble yourself about his health.”
+
+“How does he look?” asked Monsieur Ramin with perfect composure.
+
+“I caught a glimpse of him, and he appears to me to be rapidly preparing
+for the good offices of the undertaker.”
+
+Monsieur Ramin smiled, rubbed his hands, and joked merrily with a
+dark-eyed grisette, who was cheapening some ribbon for her cap. That
+girl made an excellent bargain that day.
+
+Towards dusk the mercer left the shop to the care of his attendant, and
+softly stole up to the fourth story. In answer to his gentle ring, a
+little old woman opened the door, and, giving him a rapid look, said
+briefly,
+
+“Monsieur is inexorable; he won’t see any doctor whatever.”
+
+She was going to shut the door in his face, when Ramin quickly
+interposed, under his breath, with “_I_ am not a doctor.”
+
+She looked at him from head to foot.
+
+“Are you a lawyer?”
+
+“Nothing of the sort, my good lady.”
+
+“Well then, are you a priest?”
+
+“I may almost say, quite the reverse.”
+
+“Indeed you must go away, Master sees no one.”
+
+Once more she would have shut the door; but Ramin prevented her.
+
+“My good lady,” said he in his most insinuating tones, “it is true I am
+neither a lawyer, a doctor, nor a priest. I am an old friend, a very old
+friend of your excellent master; I have come to see good Monsieur
+Bonelle in his present affliction.”
+
+Marguerite did not answer, but allowed him to enter, and closed the door
+behind him. He was going to pass from the narrow and gloomy ante-chamber
+into an inner room—whence now proceeded a sound of loud coughing—when
+the old woman laid her hand on his arm, and raising herself on tiptoe,
+to reach his ear, whispered:
+
+“For Heaven’s sake, Sir, since you are his friend, do talk to him; do
+tell him to make his will, and hint something about a soul to be saved,
+and all that sort of thing: do, Sir!”
+
+Monsieur Ramin nodded and winked in a way that said “I will.” He proved
+however his prudence by not speaking aloud; for a voice from within
+sharply exclaimed,
+
+“Marguerite, you are talking to some one. Marguerite, I will see neither
+doctor nor lawyer; and if any meddling priest dare—”
+
+“It is only an old friend, Sir;” interrupted Marguerite, opening the
+inner door.
+
+Her master, on looking up, perceived the red face of Monsieur Ramin
+peeping over the old woman’s shoulder, and irefully cried out,
+
+“How dare you bring that fellow here? And you, Sir, how dare you come?”
+
+“My good old friend, there are feelings,” said Ramin, spreading his
+fingers over the left pocket of his waistcoat,—“there are feelings,” he
+repeated, “that cannot be subdued. One such feeling brought me here. The
+fact is, I am a good-natured easy fellow, and I never bear malice. I
+never forget an old friend, but love to forget old differences when I
+find one party in affliction.”
+
+He drew a chair forward as he spoke, and composedly seated himself
+opposite to his late master.
+
+Monsieur Bonelle was a thin old man with a pale sharp face and keen
+features. At first he eyed his visitor from the depths of his vast
+arm-chair; but, as if not satisfied with this distant view, he bent
+forward, and laying both hands on his thin knees, he looked up into
+Ramin’s face with a fixed and piercing gaze. He had not, however, the
+power of disconcerting his guest.
+
+“What did you come here for?” he at length asked.
+
+“Merely to have the extreme satisfaction of seeing how you are, my good
+old friend. Nothing more.”
+
+“Well, look at me—and then go.”
+
+Nothing could be so discouraging: but this was an Excellent Opportunity,
+and when Monsieur Ramin _had_ an excellent opportunity in view, his
+pertinacity was invincible. Being now resolved to stay, it was not in
+Monsieur Bonelle’s power to banish him. At the same time, he had tact
+enough to render his presence agreeable. He knew that his coarse and
+boisterous wit had often delighted Monsieur Bonelle of old, and he now
+exerted himself so successfully as to betray the old man two or three
+times into hearty laughter.
+
+“Ramin,” said he, at length, laying his thin hand on the arm of his
+guest, and peering with his keen glance into the mercer’s purple face,
+“you are a funny fellow, but I know you; you cannot make me believe you
+have called just to see how I am, and to amuse me. Come, be candid for
+once; what do you want?”
+
+Ramin threw himself back in his chair, and laughed blandly, as much as
+to say, “_Can_ you suspect me?”
+
+“I have no shop now out of which you can wheedle me,” continued the old
+man; “and surely you are not such a fool as to come to me for money.”
+
+“Money?” repeated the draper, as if his host had mentioned something he
+never dreamt of. “Oh, no!”
+
+Ramin saw it would not do to broach the subject he had really come
+about, too abruptly, now that suspicion seemed so wide awake—_the_
+opportunity had not arrived.
+
+“There is something up, Ramin, I know; I see it in the twinkle of your
+eye: but you can’t deceive me again.”
+
+“Deceive _you_?” said the jolly schemer, shaking his head reverentially.
+“Deceive a man of your penetration and depth? Impossible! The bare
+supposition is flattery. My dear friend,” he continued, soothingly, “I
+did not dream of such a thing. The fact is, Bonelle, though they call me
+a jovial, careless, rattling dog, I have a conscience; and, somehow, I
+have never felt quite easy about the way in which I became your
+successor down-stairs. It _was_ rather sharp practice, I admit.”
+
+Bonelle seemed to relent.
+
+“Now for it,” said the Opportunity-hunter to himself.—“By-the-by,”
+(speaking aloud,) “this house must be a great trouble to you in your
+present weak state? Two of your lodgers have lately gone away without
+paying—a great nuisance, especially to an invalid.”
+
+“I tell you I’m as sound as a colt.”
+
+“At all events, the whole concern must be a great bother to you. If I
+were you, I would sell the house.”
+
+“And if I were _you_,” returned the landlord, dryly, “I would buy it——”
+
+“Precisely,” interrupted the tenant, eagerly.
+
+“That is, if you could get it. Phoo! I knew you were after something.
+Will you give eighty thousand francs for it?” abruptly asked Monsieur
+Bonelle.
+
+“Eighty thousand francs!” echoed Ramin. “Do you take me for Louis
+Philippe or the Bank of France?”
+
+“Then, we’ll say no more about it—are you not afraid of leaving your
+shop so long?”
+
+Ramin returned to the charge, heedless of the hint to depart. “The fact
+is, my good old friend, ready money is not my strong point just now. But
+if you wish very much to be relieved of the concern, what say you to a
+life annuity? I could manage that.”
+
+Monsieur Bonelle gave a short, dry, churchyard cough, and looked as if
+his life were not worth an hour’s purchase. “You think yourself
+immensely clever, I dare say,” he said. “They have persuaded you that I
+am dying. Stuff! I shall bury you yet.”
+
+The mercer glanced at the thin fragile frame, and exclaimed to himself,
+“Deluded old gentleman!” “My dear Bonelle,” he continued, aloud, “I know
+well the strength of your admirable constitution; but allow me to
+observe that you neglect yourself too much. Now, suppose a good sensible
+doctor——.”
+
+“Will you pay him?” interrogated Bonelle sharply.
+
+“Most willingly,” replied Ramin, with an eagerness that made the old man
+smile. “As to the annuity, since the subject annoys you, we will talk of
+it some other time.”
+
+“After you have heard the doctor’s report,” sneered Bonelle.
+
+The mercer gave him a stealthy glance, which the old man’s keen look
+immediately detected. Neither could repress a smile: these good souls
+understood one another perfectly, and Ramin saw that this was not the
+Excellent Opportunity he desired, and departed.
+
+The next day Ramin sent a neighbouring medical man, and heard it was his
+opinion that if Bonelle held on for three months longer, it would be a
+miracle. Delightful news!
+
+Several days elapsed, and although very anxious, Ramin assumed a
+careless air, and did not call upon his landlord, or take any notice of
+him. At the end of the week old Marguerite entered the shop to make a
+trifling purchase.
+
+“And how are we getting on up-stairs?” negligently asked Monsieur Ramin.
+
+“Worse and worse, my good Sir,” she sighed. “We have rheumatic pains,
+which make us often use expressions the reverse of Christian-like, and
+yet nothing can induce us to see either the lawyer or the priest; the
+gout is getting nearer to our stomach every day, and still we go on
+talking about the strength of our constitution. Oh, Sir, if you have any
+influence with us, do, pray do, tell us how wicked it is to die without
+making one’s will or confessing one’s sins.”
+
+“I shall go up this very evening,” ambiguously replied Monsieur Ramin.
+
+He kept his promise, and found Monsieur Bonelle in bed, groaning with
+pain, and in the worst of tempers.
+
+“What poisoning doctor did you send?” he asked, with an ireful glance;
+“I want no doctor, I am not ill; I will not follow his prescription; he
+forbade me to eat; I _will_ eat.”
+
+“He is a very clever man,” said the visitor. “He told me that never in
+the whole course of his experience has he met with what he called so
+much ‘resisting power’ as exists in your frame. He asked me if you were
+not of a long-lived race.”
+
+“That is as people may judge,” replied Monsieur Bonelle. “All I can say
+is, that my grandfather died at ninety, and my father at eighty-six.”
+
+“The doctor owned that you had a wonderfully strong constitution.”
+
+“Who said I hadn’t?” exclaimed the invalid feebly.
+
+“You may rely on it, you would preserve your health better if you had
+not the trouble of these vexatious lodgers. Have you thought about the
+life annuity?” said Ramin as carelessly as he could, considering how
+near the matter was to his hopes and wishes.
+
+“Why, I have scruples,” returned Bonelle, coughing. “I do not wish to
+take you in. My longevity would be the ruin of you.”
+
+“To meet that difficulty,” quickly replied the mercer, “we can reduce
+the interest.”
+
+“But I must have high interest,” placidly returned Monsieur Bonelle.
+
+Ramin, on hearing this, burst into a loud fit of laughter, called
+Monsieur Bonelle a sly old fox, gave him a poke in the ribs, which made
+the old man cough for five minutes, and then proposed that they should
+talk it over some other day. The mercer left Monsieur Bonelle in the act
+of protesting that he felt as strong as a man of forty.
+
+Monsieur Ramin felt in no hurry to conclude the proposed agreement. “The
+later one begins to pay, the better,” he said, as he descended the
+stairs.
+
+Days passed on, and the negotiation made no way. It struck the observant
+tradesman that all was not right. Old Marguerite several times refused
+to admit him, declaring her master was asleep: there was something
+mysterious and forbidding in her manner that seemed to Monsieur Ramin
+very ominous. At length a sudden thought occurred to him: the
+housekeeper—wishing to become her master’s heir—had heard his scheme and
+opposed it. On the very day that he arrived at this conclusion, he met a
+lawyer, with whom he had formerly had some transactions, coming down the
+staircase. The sight sent a chill through the mercer’s commercial heart,
+and a presentiment—one of those presentiments that seldom deceive—told
+him it was too late. He had, however, the fortitude to abstain from
+visiting Monsieur Bonelle until evening came; when he went up, resolved
+to see him in spite of all Marguerite might urge. The door was
+half-open, and the old housekeeper stood talking on the landing to a
+middle-aged man in a dark cassock.
+
+“It is all over! The old witch has got the priests at him,” thought
+Ramin, inwardly groaning at his own folly in allowing himself to be
+forestalled.
+
+“You cannot see Monsieur to-night,” sharply said Marguerite, as he
+attempted to pass her.
+
+“Alas! is my excellent friend so very ill?” asked Ramin, in a mournful
+tone.
+
+“Sir,” eagerly said the clergyman, catching him by the button of his
+coat, “if you are indeed the friend of that unhappy man, do seek to
+bring him into a more suitable frame of mind. I have seen many dying
+men, but never so much obstinacy, never such infatuated belief in the
+duration of life.”
+
+“Then you think he really _is_ dying?” asked Ramin; and, in spite of the
+melancholy accent he endeavoured to assume, there was something so
+peculiar in his tone, that the priest looked at him very fixedly as he
+slowly replied,
+
+“Yes, Sir, I think he is.”
+
+“Ah!” was all Monsieur Ramin said; and as the clergyman had now relaxed
+his hold of the button, Ramin passed in spite of the remonstrances of
+Marguerite, who rushed after the priest. He found Monsieur Bonelle still
+in bed and in a towering rage.
+
+“Oh! Ramin, my friend,” he groaned, “never take a housekeeper, and never
+let her know you have any property. They are harpies, Ramin,—harpies!
+such a day as I have had; first, the lawyer, who comes to write down ‘my
+last testamentary dispositions,’ as he calls them; then the priest, who
+gently hints that I am a dying man. Oh, what a day!”
+
+“And _did_ you make your will, my excellent friend?” softly asked
+Monsieur Ramin, with a keen look.
+
+“Make my will?” indignantly exclaimed the old man; “make my will? what
+do you mean, Sir? do you mean to say I am dying?”
+
+“Heaven forbid!” piously ejaculated Ramin.
+
+“Then why do you ask me if I have been making my will?” angrily resumed
+the old man. He then began to be extremely abusive.
+
+When money was in the way, Monsieur Ramin, though otherwise of a violent
+temper, had the meekness of a lamb. He bore the treatment of his host
+with the meekest patience, and having first locked the door so as to
+make sure that Marguerite would not interrupt them, he watched Monsieur
+Bonelle attentively, and satisfied himself that the Excellent
+Opportunity he had been ardently longing for had arrived. “He is going
+fast,” he thought; “and unless I settle the agreement to-night, and get
+it drawn up and signed to-morrow, it will be too late.”
+
+“My dear friend,” he at length said aloud, on perceiving that the old
+gentleman had fairly exhausted himself and was lying panting on his
+back, “you are indeed a lamentable instance of the lengths to which the
+greedy lust of lucre will carry our poor human nature. It is really
+distressing to see Marguerite, a faithful, attached servant, suddenly
+converted into a tormenting harpy by the prospect of a legacy! Lawyers
+and priests flock around you like birds of prey, drawn hither by the
+scent of gold! Oh, the miseries of having delicate health combined with
+a sound constitution and large property!”
+
+“Ramin,” groaned the old man, looking inquiringly into his visitor’s
+face, “you are again going to talk to me about that annuity—I know you
+are!”
+
+“My excellent friend, it is merely to deliver you from a painful
+position.”
+
+“I am sure, Ramin, you think in your soul I am dying,” whimpered
+Monsieur Bonelle.
+
+“Absurd, my dear Sir. Dying? I will prove to you that you have never
+been in better health. In the first place you feel no pain.”
+
+“Excepting from rheumatism,” groaned Monsieur Bonelle.
+
+“Rheumatism! who ever died of rheumatism? and if that be all——”
+
+“No, it is not all,” interrupted the old man with great irritability;
+“what would you say to the gout getting higher and higher up every day?”
+
+“The gout is rather disagreeable, but if there is nothing else——”
+
+“Yes, there is something else,” sharply said Monsieur Bonelle. “There is
+an asthma that will scarcely let me breathe, and a racking pain in my
+head that does not allow me a moment’s ease. But if you think I am
+dying, Ramin, you are quite mistaken.”
+
+“No doubt, my dear friend, no doubt; but in the meanwhile, suppose we
+talk of this annuity. Shall we say one thousand francs a year.”
+
+“What?” asked Bonelle, looking at him very fixedly.
+
+“My dear friend, I mistook; I meant two thousand francs per annum,”
+hurriedly rejoined Ramin.
+
+Monsieur Bonelle closed his eyes, and appeared to fall into a gentle
+slumber. The mercer coughed; the sick man never moved.
+
+“Monsieur Bonelle.”
+
+No reply.
+
+“My excellent friend.”
+
+Utter silence.
+
+“Are you asleep?”
+
+A long pause.
+
+“Well, then, what do you say to three thousand?”
+
+Monsieur Bonelle opened his eyes.
+
+“Ramin,” said he, sententiously, “you are a fool; the house brings me in
+four thousand as it is.”
+
+This was quite false, and the mercer knew it; but he had his own reasons
+for wishing to seem to believe it true.
+
+“Good Heavens!” said he, with an air of great innocence, “who could have
+thought it, and the lodgers constantly running away. Four thousand?
+Well, then, you shall have four thousand.”
+
+Monsieur Bonelle shut his eyes once more, and murmured “The mere
+rental—nonsense!” He then folded his hands on his breast, and appeared
+to compose himself to sleep.
+
+“Oh, what a sharp man of business he is!” Ramin said, admiringly: but
+for once omnipotent flattery failed in its effect: “So acute!” continued
+he, with a stealthy glance at the old man, who remained perfectly
+unmoved. “I see you will insist upon making it the other five hundred
+francs.”
+
+Monsieur Ramin said this as if five thousand five hundred francs had
+already been mentioned, and was the very summit of Monsieur Bonelle’s
+ambition. But the ruse failed in its effect; the sick man never so much
+as stirred.
+
+“But, my dear friend,” urged Monsieur Ramin in a tone of feeling
+remonstrance, “there is such a thing as being too sharp, too acute. How
+can you expect that I shall give you more when your constitution is so
+good, and you are to be such a long liver?”
+
+“Yes, but I may be carried off one of those days,” quietly observed the
+old man, evidently wishing to turn the chance of his own death to
+account.
+
+“Indeed, and I hope so,” muttered the mercer, who was getting very
+ill-tempered.
+
+“You see,” soothingly continued Bonelle, “you are so good a man of
+business, Ramin, that you will double the actual value of the house in
+no time. I am a quiet, easy person, indifferent to money; otherwise this
+house would now bring me in eight thousand at the very least.”
+
+“Eight thousand!” indignantly exclaimed the mercer. “Monsieur Bonelle,
+you have no conscience. Come now, my dear friend, do be reasonable. Six
+thousand francs a year (I don’t mind saying six) is really a very
+handsome income for a man of your quiet habits. Come, be reasonable.”
+But Monsieur Bonelle turned a deaf ear to reason, and closed his eyes
+once more. What between opening and shutting them for the next quarter
+of an hour, he at length induced Monsieur Ramin to offer him seven
+thousand francs.
+
+“Very well, Ramin, agreed,” he quietly said; “you have made an
+unconscionable bargain.” To this succeeded a violent fit of coughing.
+
+As Ramin unlocked the door to leave, he found old Marguerite, who had
+been listening all the time, ready to assail him with a torrent of
+whispered abuse for duping her “poor dear innocent old master into such
+a bargain.” The mercer bore it all very patiently; he could make
+allowances for her excited feelings, and only rubbed his hands and bade
+her a jovial good evening.
+
+The agreement was signed on the following day, to the indignation of old
+Marguerite, and the mutual satisfaction of the parties concerned.
+
+Every one admired the luck and shrewdness of Ramin, for the old man
+every day was reported worse; and it was clear to all that the first
+quarter of the annuity would never be paid. Marguerite, in her wrath,
+told the story as a grievance to every one: people listened, shook their
+heads, and pronounced Monsieur Ramin to be a deuced clever fellow.
+
+A month elapsed. As Ramin was coming down one morning from the attics,
+where he had been giving notice to a poor widow who had failed in paying
+her rent, he heard a light step on the stairs. Presently a sprightly
+gentleman, in buoyant health and spirits, wearing the form of Monsieur
+Bonelle, appeared. Ramin stood aghast.
+
+“Well, Ramin,” gaily said the old man, “how are you getting on? Have you
+been tormenting the poor widow up-stairs? Why, man, we must live and let
+live!”
+
+“Monsieur Bonelle,” said the mercer, in a hollow tone; “may I ask where
+are your rheumatics?”
+
+“Gone, my dear friend,—gone.”
+
+“And the gout that was creeping higher and higher every day,” exclaimed
+Monsieur Ramin, in a voice of anguish.
+
+“It went lower and lower, till it disappeared altogether,” composedly
+replied Bonelle.
+
+“And your asthma——”
+
+“The asthma remains, but asthmatic people are proverbially long-lived.
+It is, I have been told, the only complaint that Methuselah was troubled
+with.” With this Bonelle opened his door, shut it, and disappeared.
+
+Ramin was transfixed on the stairs; petrified with intense
+disappointment, and a powerful sense of having been duped. When he was
+discovered, he stared vacantly, and raved about an Excellent Opportunity
+of taking his revenge.
+
+The wonderful cure was the talk of the neighbourhood, whenever Monsieur
+Bonelle appeared in the streets, jauntily flourishing his cane. In the
+first frenzy of his despair, Ramin refused to pay; he accused every one
+of having been in a plot to deceive him; he turned off Catherine and
+expelled his porter; he publicly accused the lawyer and priest of
+conspiracy; brought an action against the doctor, and lost it. He had
+another brought against him for violently assaulting Marguerite in which
+he was cast in heavy damages. Monsieur Bonelle did not trouble himself
+with useless remonstrances, but, when his annuity was refused, employed
+such good legal arguments, as the exasperated mercer could not possibly
+resist.
+
+Ten years have elapsed, and MM. Ramin and Bonelle still live on. For a
+house which would have been dear at fifty thousand francs, the draper
+has already handed over seventy thousand.
+
+The once red-faced, jovial Ramin is now a pale haggard man, of sour
+temper and aspect. To add to his anguish, he sees the old man thrive on
+that money which it breaks his heart to give. Old Marguerite takes a
+malicious pleasure in giving him an exact account of their good cheer,
+and in asking him if he does not think Monsieur looks better and better
+every day. Of one part of this torment Ramin might get rid, by giving
+his old master notice to quit, and no longer having him in his house.
+But this he cannot do; he has a secret fear that Bonelle would take some
+Excellent Opportunity of dying without his knowledge, and giving some
+other person an Excellent Opportunity of personating him, and receiving
+the money in his stead.
+
+The last accounts of the victim of Excellent Opportunities represent him
+as being gradually worn down with disappointment. There seems every
+probability of his being the first to leave the world; for Bonelle is
+heartier than ever.
+
+
+
+
+ REVIEW OF A POPULAR PUBLICATION.
+ IN THE SEARCHING STYLE.
+
+ THE BANK NOTE. _Oblong Octavo._ London, 1850. _The Governor and
+ Company of the Bank of England. Price, from Five to One Thousand
+ Pounds._
+
+ The object of this popular but expensive pocket companion, is not
+ wholly dissimilar from that of its clever and cheaper contemporary
+ “Notes and Queries.” As the latter is a “medium of intercommunication
+ for literary men,” so the former is a medium of intercommunication for
+ commercial men; and surely there is no work with which so many queries
+ are constantly connected as the Bank Note. Nothing in existence is so
+ assiduously inquired for; nothing in nature so perseveringly sought.
+
+ This is not to be wondered at; for in whatever light we view it, to
+ whatever test we bring it, whether we read it backwards or forwards,
+ from left to right, or from right to left; or whether we make it a
+ transparency to prove its substantial genuineness and worth, who can
+ deny that the Bank Note is a most valuable work?—a publication, in
+ short, without which no gentleman’s pocket can be complete?
+
+ Few can rise from a critical examination of the literary contents of
+ this narrow sheet, without being forcibly struck with the power,
+ combined with the exquisite fineness of the writing. It strikes
+ conviction at once. It dispels all doubts, and relieves all
+ objections. There is a pithy terseness in the construction of the
+ sentences; a downright, direct, straightforward, coming to the point,
+ which would be wisely imitated in much of the contemporaneous
+ literature that constantly obtains currency (though not as much). Here
+ we have no circumlocution, no discursive pedantry, no smell of the
+ lamp; the figures, though wholly derived from the East (being Arabic
+ numerals), are distinct and full of purpose; and if the writing
+ abounds in flourishes, which it does, these are not rhetorical, but
+ boldly graphic: struck with a nervous decision of style, which,
+ instead of obscuring the text and meaning, convinces the reader that
+ he who traced them when promising to pay the sum of five, ten, twenty,
+ thirty, forty, fifty, one hundred, or a thousand pounds, means
+ honestly and instantly to keep his word: that he _will_ pay it to
+ bearer on demand, without one moment’s hesitation.
+
+ Strictly adapted for utility, yet the dulcet is not wholly overlooked;
+ for, besides figures and flourishes, the graces of art are shed over
+ this much-prized publication. The figure of Britannia is no slavish
+ reproduction of any particular school whatever. She sits upon her
+ scroll of state utterly inimitable and alone. She is hung up in one
+ corner of the page, the sole representative of the P. R. F. P., or
+ pre-reissue-of-the-fourpenny-piece, school. Neither, if judged by the
+ golden rule of our greatest bard, is the work wholly deficient in
+ another charm. As we have just explained, its words are few: brevity
+ is the soul of wit. And we fearlessly put it to the keenest
+ appreciator of good things, whether a Bank Note (say for a hundred) is
+ not the best joke conceivable—except, indeed, a Bank Note for a
+ thousand.
+
+ A critical analysis of a work of this importance cannot be complete
+ without going deeply into the subject. Reviewing is, alas, too often
+ mere surface-work; for seldom do we find the critic going below the
+ superficies, or extending his scrutiny beyond the letter-press. We
+ shall, however, set a bright example of profundity, and having
+ discharged our duty to the face of the Bank Note, shall proceed to
+ penetrate below it: having analysed the print, we shall now speak of
+ the paper.
+
+ The late Mr. Cobbett, to express his idea of the intrinsic
+ worthlessness of these sheets, in comparison with the prices at which
+ they pass current, was wont to designate Bank Notes as “Rags.” It may,
+ indeed, be said of them that, “Rags they were, and to tinder they
+ return;” for they are born of shreds of linen, and, ten years after
+ death, are converted in bonfires into the finest of known tinder. It
+ may be considered a curious fact by those who wear shirts, and a
+ painful, because hopeless one, by those who make them, that the refuse
+ or cuttings of linen forms, with a slight admixture of cotton, the
+ pabulum or pulp of Bank Note Paper. Machinery has made no inroads on
+ this branch of paper-making. The pulp is kept so well mixed in a large
+ vat, that the fibrous material presents the appearance of a huge
+ cauldron of milk. Into this the paper-maker dips his mould, which is a
+ fine wire sieve, having round its edge, a slight mahogany frame,
+ called the “Deckel,” which confines the pulp to the dimensions of the
+ mould. This dip is quite a feat of dexterity, for on it depends the
+ thickness and evenness of the sheet of paper. The water-mark, or, more
+ properly, the wire-mark, is obtained by twisting wires to the desired
+ form or design, and stitching them on the face of the mould; therefore
+ the design is above the level face of the mould, by the thickness of
+ the wires it is composed of. Hence, the pulp in settling down on the
+ mould, must of necessity be thinner on the wire design than on other
+ parts of the sheet. When the water has run off through the sieve-like
+ face of the mould, the new-born sheet of paper is transferred to a
+ blanket; this operation is called “couching,” and is effected by
+ pressing the mould gently but firmly on the blanket, when the spongy
+ sheet clings to the cloth. Sizing is a subsequent process, and, when
+ dry, the water-mark is plainly discernible, being, of course,
+ transparent where the substance is thinnest. The paper is then made up
+ into reams of five hundred sheets each, ready for press. The
+ water-mark in the notes of the Bank of England is secured to that
+ Establishment by a special Act of Parliament. Indeed, imitation of
+ anything whatever connected with a Bank Note is an extremely hazardous
+ feat.
+
+ A scrupulous examination of this curious piece of paper, implants a
+ thorough conviction that it is a very superior article—in short,
+ unique. There is nothing like it in the world of sheets. Tested by the
+ touch, it gives out a crisp, crackling, sharp, sound—a note
+ essentially its own—a music which resounds from no other quires. To
+ the eye it shows a colour belonging neither to blue-wove nor
+ yellow-wove, nor to cream-laid, but a white, like no other white,
+ either in paper and pulp. The rough fringiness of three of its edges
+ are called the “deckled” edges, being the natural boundary of the pulp
+ when first moulded; the fourth is left smooth by the knife, which
+ eventually cuts the two notes in twain. It is so thin that, when
+ printed, there is much difficulty in making erasures; yet it is so
+ strong that a “water-leaf” (a leaf before the application of size)
+ will support thirty-six pounds; and, with the addition of one grain of
+ size, half a hundred weight, without tearing; yet the quantity of
+ fibre of which it consists, is no more than eighteen grains and a
+ half.
+
+ The process of engraving the Bank Note is peculiar. Its general design
+ is remarkably plain—steel plates are used, and are engraved in a
+ manner somewhat analogous to that employed in the Mint for the
+ production of the coin, except that heavy pressure is used instead of
+ a blow. The form of the Note is divided into four or five sections,
+ each engraved on steel dies which are hardened. Steel rollers, or
+ mills, are obtained from these dies, and each portion of the Note is
+ impressed on a steel plate to be printed from by the mills until the
+ whole form is complete.
+
+ By means of a very ingenious machine, the engraving on the plates when
+ worn by long printing is repaired by the same mills, and thus perfect
+ identity of form is permanently secured. The merits of this system are
+ due to the late Mr. Oldham, and the many improvements introduced not
+ only into this, but into the printing department, are the work of his
+ son and successor, Mr. Thomas Oldham, the present chief engraver to
+ the Bank of England. The plate—always with a pair of notes upon it—is
+ now ready for the press; for it contains all the literary part of the
+ work, except the date, the number, and the cashier’s signature.
+
+ We must now review the manner of printing. Before passing through the
+ press, all paper must be damped that it may readily absorb ink; and
+ Bank Note paper is not exempt from this law; but the process by which
+ it is complied with is an ingenious exception to the ordinary modes.
+ The sheets are put into an iron chamber which is exhausted of air;
+ water is then admitted, and forces itself through every pore at the
+ rate of thirty thousand sheets, or double notes, per minute!
+
+ In a long gallery that looks like a chamber of the Inquisition with
+ self-acting racks, stands a row of plate-printing presses worked by
+ steam. Every time a sheet passes through them they emit a soft “click”
+ like a ship’s capstan creaking in a whisper. By this sound they
+ announce to all whom it may concern that they have printed two Bank
+ Notes. They are tell-tales, and keep no secrets; for, not content with
+ stating the fact aloud, each press moves, by means of a chain, an
+ index of numerals at the end of the room; so that the chief of the
+ department can see at any hour of the day how many each press has
+ printed. To take an impression of a note plate “on the sly,” is
+ therefore impossible. By a clever invention of Mr. Oldham the
+ impression returns to the printer when made, instead of remaining on
+ the opposite side of the press, after it has passed through the
+ rollers, as of old. The plates are heated, for inking, over steam
+ boxes instead of charcoal fires.
+
+ When a ream, consisting of five hundred sheets or one thousand notes,
+ have been printed, they are placed in a tray which is inserted in a
+ sort of shelf-trap that shuts up with a spring. No after-abstraction
+ can, therefore, take place. One such repository is over the index
+ appertaining to each press, and at the end of the day it can at once
+ be seen whether the number of sheets corresponds with the numerals of
+ the tell-tale. Any sort of mistake can thus be readily detected. The
+ average number of “promises to pay” printed per diem is thirty
+ thousand.
+
+ As we cannot allow the dot over an _i_, or the cross of a _t_ to
+ escape the focus of our critical microscope, we now proceed to apply
+ it to the Bank Ink. Like the liquid of Messrs. Day and Martin, this
+ inestimable composition, with half the usual labour, produces the most
+ brilliant jet-black, fully equal to the highest Japan varnish, and is
+ warranted to keep in any climate. It is made from the charred husks of
+ Rhenish grapes after their juice has been expressed and bottled for
+ exportation to the dinner-tables of half the world. When mixed with
+ pure linseed oil, carefully prepared by boiling and burning, the
+ vinous refuse produces a species of blacks so tenacious that they
+ obstinately refuse to be emancipated from the paper when once enslaved
+ to it by the press. It is so intensely nigritious that, compared with
+ it, all other blacks are musty browns; and pale beside it. If the word
+ of a printer’s devil may be taken, it is many degrees darker than the
+ streams of Erebus. Can deeper praise be awarded?
+
+ The note is, when plate-printed, two processes distant from
+ negotiable; the first being the numbering and dating—and here we must
+ point out the grand distinction which exists between the publication
+ which we have the satisfaction of stating, now lies before us (but it
+ is only a “Five”) and ordinary prints. When the types for this
+ miscellany, for instance, are once set up, every copy struck off from
+ them by the press is precisely similar. On the contrary, of those
+ emitted from the Bank presses _no two are alike_. They differ either
+ in date, in number, or in denomination. This difference constitutes a
+ grand system of check, extending over every stage of every Bank Note’s
+ career—a system which records its completion and issue, tracks it
+ through its public adventures, recognises it when it returns to the
+ Bank, from among hundreds of thousands of companions, and finally
+ enables the proper officers to pounce upon it, in case of inquiry, at
+ any official half hour for ten years after it has returned in
+ fulfilment of its “promise to pay,” To promise an explanation of what
+ must appear so complicated a plan, may seem to the reader like a
+ threat of prolixity. But he may read on in security; the system is as
+ simple as the alphabet.
+
+ Understand then, that the dates of Bank Notes are arbitrary, and bear
+ no reference to the day of issue. At the beginning of the official
+ year (February) the Directors settle what dates each of the eleven
+ denominations of Bank Notes shall bear during the ensuing twelve
+ months, taking care to apportion to each sort of note a separate date.
+ The table of dates is then handed to the proper officer, who prints
+ accordingly. The five-pound Note which now rejoices our eyes is, for
+ example, dated February the 2nd, 1850; we therefore know that there is
+ no genuine note in existence, for any other sum, which bears that
+ date; and if a note for ten, twenty, fifty, hundred, &c., having “2nd
+ Feb., 1850,” upon it were to be offered to us or to a Bank Clerk, we
+ or he would, without a shadow of further evidence, impound it as a
+ forgery.
+
+ Now, as to the numbering:—It is a rule that of every date and
+ denomination, one hundred thousand Notes—no more and no less—shall be
+ completed and issued at one time. We know, therefore, that our
+ solitary five is one of a hundred thousand other fives, each bearing a
+ different number—from 1[2] to 100,000—but all dated 2nd Feb., 1850.
+ The numbers are printed on each Note by means of a letter-press, the
+ types of which change with each pull of the press. For the first Note,
+ the press is set at “00001,” and when that is printed, the “1,” by the
+ mere act of impression, retires to make room for “2,” which impresses
+ itself on the next Note, and so on up to “100,000.” The system has
+ been applied to the stamping of railway tickets. The date, being
+ required for the whole series, is of course immovable. After this has
+ been done, the autograph of a cashier is only requisite to render the
+ Note worth the value inscribed on it, in gold.
+
+Footnote 2:
+
+ To prevent fraudulent additions of numerals, less than five figures
+ are never used. When units, tens, &c., are required, they are
+ preceded by cyphers. “One” is therefore expressed on a Bank Note
+ thus:—“00001.”
+
+ While the printers are at work, manufacturing each series of Notes,
+ the account-book makers are getting-up a series of ledgers so exactly
+ to correspond, that the books of themselves, without the stroke of a
+ pen, are a record of the existence of the Note. The book in which the
+ birth of our own especial and particular “Five” is registered, is
+ legibly inscribed,
+
+ “Fives, Feb. 2, 1850.”
+
+ When you open a page, you find it to consist of a series of horizontal
+ and perpendicular lines, like the pattern of a pair of shepherd’s
+ plaid inexpressibles, variegated with columns of numerals; these
+ figures running on regularly from No. 1, on the top of the first page,
+ to No. 100,000 at the bottom of the last. It must therefore be obvious
+ to the meanest capacity that the mere existence of that book, with its
+ arbitrary date and series of numbers, corresponding to the like series
+ of Notes, is a sufficient record of the existence and issue of the
+ latter. The return of each Note after its public travels, is recorded
+ in the square opposite to its number. Each page of the book contains
+ two hundred squares and numbers; consequently, whatever number a Note
+ may bear, the Clerk who has to register its safe return from a long
+ round of public circulation, knows at once on which page of the book
+ to pounce for its own proper and particular square. In that he inserts
+ the date of its return—not at full length, but in cypher. “S” in red
+ ink means 1850, and the months are indicated by one of the letters of
+ the word AMBIDEXTROUS, with the date in numerals. Our only, and
+ therefore favourite, five is numbered 31177. Should it chance to
+ finish its travels in the Accountant’s Office on the 6th of August
+ next, it will be narrowly inspected (for fear of forgery) and
+ defaced—a Clerk will then turn at once to the book lettered “Fives,
+ Feb. 2,” and so exactly will he know which page to open, and where the
+ square numbered 31177 is situated, that he could point to it
+ blindfold. He will write in it “6 t,” which means 6th August; that
+ being the eighth month in the year, and “t” the eighth letter in the
+ chosen word.
+
+ The intermediate history of a Bank Note is soon told.
+ Nineteen-twentieths are issued to Bankers or known houses of business.
+ If Glynn’s, or Smith’s, or any other banking firm, require a hundred
+ ten-pound Notes, the Clerk who issues them makes a memorandum showing
+ the number of the Notes so issued, and the name of the party to whom
+ they have been handed—an easy process, because Notes being new,[3] are
+ always given out in regular series, and the first and last Note that
+ makes the sum required need only be recorded. Most Bankers make
+ similar memoranda when notes pass out of their hands; and the public,
+ as each Note circulates among them, frequently sign the name of the
+ last holder. When an unknown person presents a Note for gold at the
+ Bank of England, he is required to write his name and address on it,
+ and if the sum be very large, it is not paid without inquiry. By these
+ expedients, a stolen, lost, or forged note can often be traced from
+ hand to hand up to its advent.
+
+Footnote 3:
+
+ The Bank ceased to re-issue its Notes since 1835.
+
+ The average periods which each denomination of London Notes remain in
+ circulation has been calculated, and is shown by the following
+
+ ACCOUNT OF THE
+ NUMBER OF DAYS
+ A BANK NOTE
+ ISSUED IN
+ LONDON REMAINS
+ IN
+ CIRCULATION:—
+
+ £5 72·7 days
+ 10 77·0 „
+ 20 57·4 „
+ 30 18·9 „
+ 40 13·7 „
+ 50 38·8 „
+ 100 29·4 „
+ 200 12·7 „
+ 300 10·6 „
+ 500 11·8 „
+ 1000 11·1 „
+
+ The exceptions to these averages are few, and, therefore, remarkable.
+ The time during which some Notes remain unpresented are reckoned by
+ the century. On the 27th of September, 1845, a fifty pound Note was
+ presented bearing date 20th January, 1743. Another for ten pounds,
+ issued on the 19th November, 1762, was not paid till the 20th April,
+ 1843. There is a legend extant, of the eccentric possessor of a
+ thousand pound Note, who kept it framed and glazed for a series of
+ years, preferring to feast his eyes on it, to putting the amount it
+ represented out at interest. It was converted into gold, however,
+ without a day’s loss of time by his heirs, on his demise. Stolen and
+ lost Notes are generally long absentees. The former usually make their
+ appearance soon after some great horse-race, or other sporting event,
+ altered or disguised so as to deceive Bankers, to whom the Bank of
+ England furnishes a list of the numbers and dates of stolen Notes. In
+ a Chapter on Forgery, which we are preparing, the reader will see some
+ singular facts on this point.
+
+ Mr. Francis, in his “History of the Bank of England,” tells a curious
+ story about a bank post bill, which was detained during thirty years
+ from presentation and payment. It happened in the year 1740:—“One of
+ the Directors, a very rich man, had occasion for 30,000_l._, which he
+ was to pay as the price of an estate be had just bought; to facilitate
+ the matter, he carried the sum with him to the Bank and obtained for
+ it a Bank bill. On his return home, he was suddenly called out upon
+ particular business; he threw the Note carelessly on the chimney, but
+ when he came back a few minutes afterwards to lock it up, it was not
+ to be found. No one had entered the room; he could not therefore
+ suspect any person. At last, after much ineffectual search, he was
+ persuaded that it had fallen from the chimney into the fire. The
+ Director went to acquaint his colleagues with the misfortune that had
+ happened to him; and as he was known to be a perfectly honourable man
+ he was readily believed. It was only about four-and-twenty hours from
+ the time that he had deposited his money; they thought, therefore,
+ that it would be hard to refuse his request for a second bill. He
+ received it upon giving an obligation to restore the first bill, if it
+ should ever be found, or to pay the money himself, if it should be
+ presented by any stranger. About thirty years afterwards (the Director
+ having been long dead, and his heirs in possession of his fortune), an
+ unknown person presented the lost bill at the Bank, and demanded
+ payment. It was in vain that they mentioned to this person the
+ transaction by which that bill was annulled; he would not listen to
+ it; he maintained that it had come to him from abroad, and insisted
+ upon immediate payment. The Note was payable to bearer; and the thirty
+ thousand pounds were paid him. The heirs of the Director would not
+ listen to any demands of restitution; and the Bank was obliged to
+ sustain the loss. It was discovered afterwards that an architect
+ having purchased the Director’s house, had taken it down, in order to
+ build another upon the same spot, had found the Note in a crevice of
+ the chimney, and made his discovery an engine for robbing the Bank.”
+
+[Illustration: ‘Illustration]
+
+ Carelessness, equal to that recorded above, is not at all uncommon,
+ and gives the Bank enormous profit, against which the loss of a mere
+ thirty thousand pound is but a trifle. Bank Notes have been known to
+ light pipes, to wrap up snuff, to be used as curl-papers; and British
+ tars, mad with rum and prize-money, have not unfrequently, in time of
+ war, made sandwiches of them, and eaten them between bread-and-butter.
+ In the forty years between the years 1792 and 1812 there were
+ out-standing Notes (presumed to have been lost or destroyed) amounting
+ to one million, three hundred and thirty odd thousand pounds; every
+ shilling of which was clear profit to the Bank.
+
+ The superannuation, death, and burial of a Bank of England Note is a
+ story soon told. The returned Notes, or promises performed, are kept
+ in “The Library” for ten years, and then burnt in an iron cage in one
+ of the Bank yards.
+
+ A few words on the history and general appearance of the Bank of
+ England Note will conclude our criticism.
+
+ The strong principle to insure the detection of forgery is uniformity;
+ hence, from the very first Note issued by the Bank, to that, the
+ merits of which we are now discussing, the same general design has
+ been preserved,—only that the execution has been from time to time
+ improved; except, we are bound to add, that of the signatures, some of
+ which are still as illegible as ever. Originally, Notes were granted
+ more in the form of Bank post-bills,—that is, not nominally to a
+ member of the establishment, but really to the party applying for
+ them, and for any sum he might require. If it suited his convenience,
+ he presented his Note several times, drawing such lesser sums as he
+ might require; precisely as if it were a letter of credit, after the
+ manner of the Sailor mentioned in the latest edition of Joe Miller.
+ Jack, somehow or other, got possession of a fifty pound Note; the sum
+ was so dazzlingly enormous that he had not the heart, on presenting it
+ for payment, to demand the whole sum at once, for fear of breaking the
+ Bank. So, leaning confidentially over the counter, he whispered to the
+ cashier, that he wouldn’t be hard upon ’em. He knew times were
+ bad,—so, as it was all the same to him, he would take five sovereigns
+ now, and the rest at so much a week. In like manner, the fac-simile on
+ the opposite page, while it presents a specimen of one of the earliest
+ Bank Notes in existence, shows that the holder took the amount as Jack
+ proposed;—by instalments. It was granted to Mr. Thomas Powell, on the
+ 19th of December, 1699, for five hundred and fifty-five pounds. His
+ first draft was one hundred and thirty-one pounds, ten shillings, and
+ one penny; the second “in gould,” three hundred and sixty; the third,
+ sixty-three pounds, nine shillings, and elevenpence, when the note was
+ retained by the Bank as having been fully honoured.
+
+ With this curious specimen of the ancient Bank of England Note, we
+ take leave of the modern ones—only, however, for a short time. In a
+ week or two, we shall change the topic (as we have previously
+ intimated) to one closely bearing upon it. Circumstances, however,
+ demand that we should change the subject of it at a much earlier date.
+
+
+
+
+ INNOCENCE AND CRIME.
+ AN ANECDOTE.
+
+
+ A benevolent old gentleman—the late Mr. Harcourt Brown of Beech
+ Hall—was plodding his way home to his hotel from a ramble in the
+ suburbs of London; and having made a bold attempt at “a short cut,”
+ soon found himself lost in a maze of squalid streets, leading one into
+ the other, and apparently leading no where else. He inquired his way
+ in vain. From the first person, he received a coarse jest; from
+ another, a look of vacant stupidity; a third eyed him in dogged
+ silence. He stepped with one foot into several wretched little shops;
+ but the people really seemed to know nothing beyond the next street or
+ alley, except one man, a dealer in tripe, of a strange, earthy colour,
+ who called over his shoulder, “Oh, you’re miles out o’ your way!” The
+ only exception to the general indifference, rudeness and stupidity,
+ was a thin sallow-cheeked man, who had a fixed smile on his face, and
+ spoke in rather an abject cringing tone of obsequiousness, and even
+ walked up one street and down a second to show Mr. Brown the way. But
+ it soon became evident that he knew nothing about the matter, and he
+ slunk away with the same fixed unmeaning smile.
+
+ In this state of affairs Mr. Brown buttoned up his coat, and manfully
+ resolved to work his way out of this filthy locality by walking
+ straight forward.
+
+ Trudging onward at a smart pace, the worthy gentleman presently heard
+ the sound of sobbing and crying, and behind the boards of a shed at
+ the side of a ruined hovel he saw a girl of some nine or ten years of
+ age, clasping and unclasping her hands in a paroxysm of grief and
+ apprehension. “Oh, what _shall_ I do?—what _shall_ I do?” sobbed the
+ child.
+
+ She started with terror as Mr. Brown approached, and hid her head in
+ the folds of her little apron; but on being assured by the mild voice
+ of Mr. Brown that he had no thought of hurting her, she ventured to
+ look up. She had soft blue eyes, flaxen hair of silvery glossiness,
+ pretty features; and, notwithstanding the stain of tears down a cheek
+ which had a smear of brickdust upon it, had a most innocent and
+ prepossessing face.
+
+ “What is the matter, my little girl?” inquired Mr. Brown.
+
+ The child turned one shoulder half round, and displayed the red and
+ purple marks of blows from a whip or stick.
+
+ “What cruel wretch has done this?” asked Mr. Brown. “Tell me, child;
+ tell me directly.”
+
+ “It was mother,” sobbed the child.
+
+ “Ah—I’m sorry to hear this. Perhaps you have been naughty?”
+
+ “Yes, Sir;” answered the child.
+
+ “Poor child,” ejaculated Mr. Brown; “but you will not be naughty
+ again. What was your offence. Come, tell me?”
+
+ “I shook it, Sir; oh, yes, it’s quite true; I did shake it very much.”
+
+ “What did you shake?” inquired Mr. Brown.
+
+ “I shook the doll, Sir.”
+
+ “The doll! Oh, you mean you shook the baby; that, certainly was
+ naughty of you;” said Mr. Brown.
+
+ “No, Sir; it was not the baby I shook—it was the doll; and I’m afraid
+ to go home—mother will be sure to beat me again.”
+
+ An impulse of benevolence led Mr. Brown’s hand to search for his
+ purse. Had he tried the wrong pocket? His purse was on the other side.
+ No, it was not—it must be in this inner pocket. Where _is_ Mr. Brown’s
+ purse? It is not in any of his pockets! He tries them all over again.
+ And his pocket-book!—chiefly of memorandums, but also having a few
+ bank notes. This is gone too—and his silk handkerchief—both his
+ handkerchiefs!—also his silver-gilt snuff-box, filled with rappee only
+ five minutes before he left the hotel this morning—he is certain he
+ had it when he came out—but it is certainly gone! Every single thing
+ he had in his pockets is gone.
+
+ The child also—now _she_ is gone! Mr. Brown looks around him, and
+ yonder he sees the poor child flying with frequent looks behind of
+ terror,—and now a shrill and frightful voice causes him to start.
+ Turning in that direction, the sudden flight of the little girl is
+ immediately explained. Over the rubbish and refuse, at a swift, wild
+ pace, courses a fiendish woman, with a savage eye and open mouth, her
+ cheeks hollow, her teeth projecting, her thin hair flying like a bit
+ of diseased mane over her half-naked shoulder; she has a stick in her
+ hand, with which she constantly threatens the flying child, whom her
+ execrations follow yet more swiftly than her feet.
+
+ Mr. Brown remained watching them till they were out of sight. He once
+ more searched all his pockets, but they were all empty. He called to
+ mind the man with the fixed smile on his hollow cadaverous cheek, and
+ several other faces of men whom he had casually noticed in the course
+ of the last half hour, thinking what a pity it was that something
+ could not be done for them. He now began to think it was a very great
+ pity that something had not _already_ been done for them or with them,
+ for they had certainly “done” him. Poor Mr. Brown!
+
+ Some six or seven months after this most disagreeable adventure, it
+ chanced that Mr. Brown was going over the prison at Coldbath Fields,
+ accompanied by the Governor. As they entered one of the wards, the
+ voice of a child sobbing, attracted the ears of our philanthropist. In
+ answer to his inquiries, the Governor informed him that it was a child
+ of about eleven years of age, who had been detected in the act of
+ picking a lady’s pocket in one of the most crowded thoroughfares.
+
+ On a few kind words being spoken to her, she looked up; and in the
+ blue eye, glossy flaxen hair, and pretty features, Mr. Brown at once
+ recognised the little girl who had “shaken the doll.”
+
+ “This child is an innocent creature!” cried he, turning to the
+ Governor, “the victim of ignorance and cruel treatment at home. I
+ recollect her well. Her mother had beaten her most shamefully; and the
+ last glimpse I had of her was in her flight from a still more savage
+ assault. And for what crime do you suppose?”
+
+ “For not picking pockets expertly, I dare say:” replied the Governor.
+
+ “Nothing of the sort!” exclaimed Mr. Brown. “Would you believe it,
+ Sir; it was for nothing more than a childish bit of pretence-anger
+ with her doll, on which occasion she gave the doll a good shaking.
+ Mere pretence, you know.”
+
+ “My dear Sir,” said the Governor, smiling, “I fancy I am right, after
+ all. She was beaten for not being expert in the study and practice of
+ pocket-picking at home. You are not, perhaps, aware that the lesson
+ consists in picking the pockets of a figure which is hung up in the
+ room, in such a way that the least awkwardness of touch makes it
+ shake, and rings a little bell attached to it. This figure is called
+ the ‘doll.’ Those who ring the bell, shake it in emptying its pockets,
+ are punished according to the mind and temper of the instructor.”
+
+ “Good heavens!” ejaculated Mr. Brown, “to what perfection must the art
+ be brought! Then it is all accounted for. The sallow gentleman with
+ the fixed smile must have been master of the craft of not shaking the
+ doll, when he took my purse, pocket-book, snuff-box, and both
+ handkerchiefs from me, without my feeling so much as the motion of the
+ air!”
+
+ * * * * *
+
+ Monthly Supplement of “HOUSEHOLD WORDS,”
+ Conducted by CHARLES DICKENS.
+
+
+ _Price 2d., Stamped, 3d._,
+ THE HOUSEHOLD NARRATIVE
+ OF
+ CURRENT EVENTS.
+
+
+ _The Number, containing a history of the past month, was issued with
+ the Magazines._
+
+------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+
+
+
+ TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES
+
+
+ ● Fixed typos; non-standard spelling and dialect retained.
+ ● Renumbered footnotes.
+ ● Enclosed italics font in _underscores_.
+ ● The caret (^) is used to indicate superscript, whether applied to a
+ single character (as in 2^d) or to an entire expression (as in
+ 1^{st}).
+
+*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 78183 ***
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+<div style='text-align:center'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 78183 ***</div>
+
+<div class='tnotes covernote'>
+
+<p class='c000'><strong>Transcriber’s Note:</strong></p>
+
+<p class='c000'>New original cover art included with this eBook is granted to the public domain.</p>
+
+</div>
+
+<div class='double titlepage'>
+
+<div class='nf-center-c0'>
+<div class='nf-center c001'>
+ <div>“<i>Familiar in their Mouths as HOUSEHOLD WORDS.</i>”—<span class='sc'>Shakespeare.</span></div>
+ </div>
+</div>
+
+<div>
+ <span class='pageno' id='Page_409'>409</span>
+ <h1 class='c002'>HOUSEHOLD WORDS.<br> <span class='xlarge'>A WEEKLY JOURNAL.</span></h1>
+</div>
+
+<div class='nf-center-c0'>
+<div class='nf-center c001'>
+ <div><span class='large'>CONDUCTED BY CHARLES DICKENS.</span></div>
+ <div class='c001'>N<sup>o.</sup> 18.]&#8196; &#8196; &#8196; SATURDAY, JULY 27, 1850.&#8196; &#8196; &#8196; [<span class='sc'>Price</span> 2<i>d.</i></div>
+ </div>
+</div>
+
+</div>
+
+<div class='chapter'>
+ <h2 class='c003'>A DETECTIVE POLICE PARTY.</h2>
+</div>
+
+<p class='c004'>In pursuance of the intention mentioned at
+the close of a former paper on “The Modern
+Science of Thief-taking,” we now proceed to
+endeavour to convey to our readers some
+faint idea of the extraordinary dexterity,
+patience, and ingenuity, exercised by the Detective
+Police. That our description may be
+as graphic as we can render it, and may be
+perfectly reliable, we will make it, so far as
+in us lies, a piece of plain truth. And first,
+we have to inform the reader how the anecdotes
+we are about to communicate, came to
+our knowledge.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>We are not by any means devout believers
+in the Old Bow-Street Police. To say the
+truth, we think there was a vast amount of
+humbug about those worthies. Apart from
+many of them being men of very indifferent
+character, and far too much in the habit of
+consorting with thieves and the like, they
+never lost a public occasion of jobbing and
+trading in mystery and making the most of
+themselves. Continually puffed besides by
+incompetent magistrates anxious to conceal
+their own deficiencies, and hand-in-glove
+with the penny-a-liners of that time, they became
+a sort of superstition. Although as a
+Preventive Police they were utterly ineffective,
+and as a Detective Police were very
+loose and uncertain in their operations, they
+remain with some people, a superstition to
+the present day.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>On the other hand, the Detective Force
+organised since the establishment of the existing
+Police, is so well chosen and trained,
+proceeds so systematically and quietly, does its
+business in such a workman-like manner, and
+is always so calmly and steadily engaged in
+the service of the public, that the public
+really do not know enough of it, to know a
+tithe of its usefulness. Impressed with this
+conviction, and interested in the men themselves,
+we represented to the authorities at
+Scotland Yard, that we should be glad, if
+there were no official objection, to have some
+talk with the Detectives. A most obliging
+and ready permission being given, a certain
+evening was appointed with a certain Inspector
+for a social conference between ourselves and
+the Detectives, at our Office in Wellington
+Street, Strand, London. In consequence of
+which appointment the party “came off,”
+which we are about to describe. And we beg
+to repeat that, avoiding such topics as it
+might for obvious reasons be injurious to the
+public, or disagreeable to respectable individuals,
+to touch upon in print, our description
+is as exact as we can make it.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The reader will have the goodness to
+imagine the Sanctum Sanctorum of Household
+Words. Anything that best suits the reader’s
+fancy, will best represent that magnificent
+chamber. We merely stipulate for a round
+table in the middle, with some glasses and
+cigars arranged upon it; and the editorial sofa
+elegantly hemmed in between that stately
+piece of furniture and the wall.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>It is a sultry evening at dusk. The stones
+of Wellington Street are hot and gritty, and
+the watermen and hackney-coachmen at
+the Theatre opposite, are much flushed and
+aggravated. Carriages are constantly setting
+down the people who have come to Fairy-Land;
+and there is a mighty shouting and
+bellowing every now and then, deafening us
+for the moment, through the open windows.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Just at dusk, Inspectors Wield and Stalker
+are announced; but we do not undertake to
+warrant the orthography of any of the names
+here mentioned. Inspector Wield presents
+Inspector Stalker. Inspector Wield is a
+middle-aged man of a portly presence, with
+a large, moist, knowing eye, a husky voice,
+and a habit of emphasising his conversation
+by the aid of a corpulent fore-finger, which is
+constantly in juxta-position with his eyes or
+nose. Inspector Stalker is a shrewd, hard-headed
+Scotchman—in appearance not at all
+unlike a very acute, thoroughly-trained schoolmaster,
+from the Normal Establishment at
+Glasgow. Inspector Wield one might have
+known, perhaps, for what he is—Inspector
+Stalker, never.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The ceremonies of reception over, Inspectors
+Wield and Stalker observe that they have
+brought some sergeants with them. The
+sergeants are presented—five in number,
+Sergeant Dornton, Sergeant Witchem, Sergeant
+Mith, Sergeant Fendall, and Sergeant
+Straw. We have the whole Detective Force
+from Scotland Yard with one exception. They
+sit down in a semi-circle (the two Inspectors
+at the two ends) at a little distance from the
+round table, facing the editorial sofa. Every
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_410'>410</span>man of them, in a glance, immediately takes
+an inventory of the furniture and an accurate
+sketch of the editorial presence. The Editor
+feels that any gentleman in company could
+take him up, if need should be, without the
+smallest hesitation, twenty years hence.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The whole party are in plain clothes.
+Sergeant Dornton, about fifty years of age,
+with a ruddy face and a high sun-burnt forehead,
+has the air of one who has been a
+Sergeant in the army—he might have sat to
+Wilkie for the Soldier in the Reading of the
+Will. He is famous for steadily pursuing the
+inductive process, and, from small beginnings,
+working on from clue to clue until he bags
+his man. Sergeant Witchem, shorter and
+thicker-set, and marked with the small pox,
+has something of a reserved and thoughtful
+air, as if he were engaged in deep arithmetical
+calculations. He is renowned for his acquaintance
+with the swell mob. Sergeant Mith, a
+smooth-faced man with a fresh bright complexion,
+and a strange air of simplicity, is a
+dab at housebreakers. Sergeant Fendall, a
+light-haired, well-spoken, polite person, is a
+prodigious hand at pursuing private inquiries
+of a delicate nature. Straw, a little wiry
+Sergeant of meek demeanour and strong
+sense, would knock at a door and ask a series
+of questions in any mild character you chose
+to prescribe to him, from a charity-boy upwards,
+and seem as innocent as an infant.
+They are, one and all, respectable-looking
+men; of perfectly good deportment and
+unusual intelligence; with nothing lounging
+or slinking in their manners; with an air
+of keen observation, and quick perception
+when addressed; and generally presenting
+in their faces, traces more or less marked
+of habitually leading lives of strong mental
+excitement. They have all good eyes; and
+they all can, and they all do, look full at whomsoever
+they speak to.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>We light the cigars, and hand round the
+glasses (which are very temperately used
+indeed), and the conversation begins by a
+modest amateur reference on the Editorial
+part to the swell mob. Inspector Wield immediately
+removes his cigar from his lips,
+waves his right hand, and says, “Regarding
+the Swell Mob, Sir, I can’t do better than call
+upon Sergeant Witchem. Because the reason
+why? I’ll tell you. Sergeant Witchem is
+better acquainted with the Swell Mob than
+any officer in London.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Our heart leaping up when we beheld this
+rainbow in the sky, we turn to Sergeant
+Witchem, who very concisely, and in well-chosen
+language, goes into the subject forthwith.
+Meantime, the whole of his brother
+officers are closely interested in attending to
+what he says, and observing its effect. Presently
+they begin to strike in, one or two
+together, when an opportunity offers, and
+the conversation becomes general. But these
+brother officers only come in to the assistance
+of each other—not to the contradiction—and
+a more amicable brotherhood there could not
+be. From the swell mob, we diverge to the
+kindred topics of cracksmen, fences, public-house
+dancers, area-sneaks, designing young
+people who go out “gonophing,” and other
+“schools,” to which our readers have already
+been introduced. It is observable throughout
+these revelations, that Inspector Stalker, the
+Scotchman, is always exact and statistical, and
+that when any question of figures arises, everybody
+as by one consent pauses, and looks to
+him.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>When we have exhausted the various
+schools of Art—during which discussion the
+whole body have remained profoundly attentive,
+except when some unusual noise at the
+Theatre over the way, has induced some
+gentleman to glance inquiringly towards the
+window in that direction, behind his next
+neighbour’s back—we burrow for information
+on such points as the following. Whether
+there really are any highway robberies in
+London, or whether some circumstances not
+convenient to be mentioned by the aggrieved
+party, usually precede the robberies complained
+of, under that head, which quite
+change their character? Certainly the latter,
+almost always. Whether in the case of robberies
+in houses, where servants are necessarily
+exposed to doubt, innocence under
+suspicion ever becomes so like guilt in appearance,
+that a good officer need be cautious
+how he judges it? Undoubtedly. Nothing
+is so common or deceptive as such appearances
+at first. Whether in a place of public amusement,
+a thief knows an officer, and an officer
+knows a thief,—supposing them, beforehand,
+strangers to each other—because each recognises
+in the other, under all disguise, an
+inattention to what is going on, and a purpose
+that is not the purpose of being entertained?
+Yes. That’s the way exactly. Whether it
+is reasonable or ridiculous to trust to the
+alleged experiences of thieves as narrated by
+themselves, in prisons, or penitentiaries, or
+anywhere? In general, nothing more absurd.
+Lying is their habit and their trade; and they
+would rather lie—even if they hadn’t an
+interest in it, and didn’t want to make themselves
+agreeable—than tell the truth.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>From these topics, we glide into a review of
+the most celebrated and horrible of the great
+crimes that have been committed within the
+last fifteen or twenty years. The men engaged
+in the discovery of almost all of them,
+and in the pursuit or apprehension of the
+murderers, are here, down to the very last
+instance. One of our guests gave chase to
+and boarded the Emigrant Ship, in which the
+murderess last hanged in London was supposed
+to have embarked. We learn from
+him that his errand was not announced to
+the passengers, who may have no idea of it to
+this hour. That he went below, with the
+captain, lamp in hand—it being dark, and the
+whole steerage abed and seasick—and engaged
+the Mrs. Manning who <i>was</i> on board, in a
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_411'>411</span>conversation about her luggage, until she was,
+with no small pains, induced to raise her
+head, and turn her face towards the light.
+Satisfied that she was not the object of his
+search, he quietly re-embarked in the Government
+steamer alongside, and steamed home
+again with the intelligence.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>When we have exhausted these subjects,
+too, which occupy a considerable time in the
+discussion, two or three leave their chairs,
+whisper Sergeant Witchem, and resume their
+seats. Sergeant Witchem, leaning forward a
+little, and placing a hand on each of his legs,
+then modestly speaks as follows:</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“My brother officers wish me to relate a
+little account of my taking Tally-ho Thompson.
+A man oughtn’t to tell what he has done
+himself; but still, as nobody was with me, and,
+consequently, as nobody but myself can tell
+it, I’ll do it in the best way I can, if it should
+meet your approval.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>We assure Sergeant Witchem that he will
+oblige us very much, and we all compose
+ourselves to listen with great interest and
+attention.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Tally-ho Thompson,” says Sergeant
+Witchem, after merely wetting his lips with
+his brandy-and-water, “Tally-ho Thompson
+was a famous horse-stealer, couper, and magsman.
+Thompson, in conjunction with a pal
+that occasionally worked with him, gammoned
+a countryman out of a good round sum
+of money, under pretence of getting him a
+situation—the regular old dodge—and was
+afterwards in the ‘Hue and Cry’ for a horse—a
+horse that he stole, down in Hertfordshire.
+I had to look after Thompson, and I
+applied myself, of course, in the first instance,
+to discovering where he was. Now, Thompson’s
+wife lived, along with a little daughter, at
+Chelsea. Knowing that Thompson was somewhere
+in the country, I watched the house—especially
+at post-time in the morning—thinking
+Thompson was pretty likely to write to her.
+Sure enough, one morning the postman comes
+up, and delivers a letter at Mrs. Thompson’s
+door. Little girl opens the door, and takes it
+in. We’re not always sure of postmen, though
+the people at the post-offices are always very
+obliging. A postman may help us, or he may
+not,—just as it happens. However, I go across
+the road, and I say to the postman, after he
+has left the letter, ‘Good morning! how are
+you?’ ‘How are <i>you</i>?’ says he. ‘You’ve just
+delivered a letter for Mrs. Thompson.’ ‘Yes,
+I have.’ ‘You didn’t happen to remark what
+the post-mark was, perhaps?’ ‘No,’ says he,
+‘I didn’t.’ ‘Come,’ says I, ‘I’ll be plain with
+you. I’m in a small way of business, and I
+have given Thompson credit, and I can’t afford
+to lose what he owes me. I know he’s got
+money, and I know he’s in the country, and
+if you could tell me what the post-mark was,
+I should be very much obliged to you, and
+you’d do a service to a tradesman in a small
+way of business that can’t afford a loss.’
+‘Well,’ he said, ‘I do assure you that I did not
+observe what the post-mark was; all I know is,
+that there was money in the letter—I should
+say a sovereign.’ This was enough for me, because
+of course I knew that Thompson having
+sent his wife money, it was probable she’d write
+to Thompson, by return of post, to acknowledge
+the receipt. So I said ‘Thankee’ to the
+postman, and I kept on the watch. In the
+afternoon I saw the little girl come out. Of
+course I followed her. She went into a stationer’s
+shop, and I needn’t say to you that I
+looked in at the window. She bought some
+writing-paper and envelopes, and a pen. I
+think to myself, ‘That’ll do!’—watch her
+home again—and don’t go away, you may be
+sure, knowing that Mrs. Thompson was writing
+her letter to Tally-ho, and that the letter
+would be posted presently. In about an hour
+or so, out came the little girl again, with the
+letter in her hand. I went up, and said something
+to the child, whatever it might have
+been; but I couldn’t see the direction of the
+letter, because she held it with the seal upwards.
+However, I observed that on the back
+of the letter there was what we call a kiss—a
+drop of wax by the side of the seal—and again,
+you understand, that was enough for me. I
+saw her post the letter, waited till she was
+gone, then went into the shop, and asked to
+see the Master. When he came out, I told
+him, ‘Now, I’m an Officer in the Detective
+Force; there’s a letter with a kiss been
+posted here just now, for a man that I’m in
+search of; and what I have to ask of you, is,
+that you will let me look at the direction of
+that letter.’ He was very civil—took a lot of
+letters from the box in the window—shook
+’em out on the counter with the faces downwards—and
+there among ’em was the identical
+letter with the kiss. It was directed, Mr.
+Thomas Pigeon, Post-Office, B——, to
+be left ’till called for. Down I went to
+B—— (a hundred and twenty miles or
+so) that night. Early next morning I went
+to the Post-Office; saw the gentleman in
+charge of that department; told him who
+I was; and that my object was to see, and
+track, the party that should come for the letter
+for Mr. Thomas Pigeon. He was very polite,
+and said, ‘You shall have every assistance
+we can give you; you can wait inside the
+office; and we’ll take care to let you know
+when anybody comes for the letter.’ Well, I
+waited there, three days, and began to think
+that nobody ever <i>would</i> come. At last the
+clerk whispered to me, ‘Here! Detective!
+Somebody’s come for the letter!’ ‘Keep him
+a minute,’ said I, and I ran round to the outside
+of the office. There I saw a young chap
+with the appearance of an Ostler, holding a
+horse by the bridle—stretching the bridle
+across the pavement, while he waited at the
+Post-Office Window for the letter. I began
+to pat the horse, and that; and I said to the
+boy, ‘Why, this is Mr. Jones’s Mare!’ ‘No.
+It an’t.’ ‘No?’ said I. ‘She’s very like Mr.
+Jones’s Mare!’ ‘She an’t Mr. Jones’s Mare,
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_412'>412</span>anyhow,’ says he. ‘It’s Mr. So-and-So’s,
+of the Warwick Arms.’ And up he jumped,
+and off he went—letter and all. I got a cab,
+followed on the box, and was so quick after
+him that I came into the stable-yard of the
+Warwick Arms, by one gate, just as he came
+in by another. I went into the bar, where
+there was a young woman serving, and called
+for a glass of brandy-and-water. He came in
+directly, and handed her the letter. She
+casually looked at it, without saying anything,
+and stuck it up behind the glass over the
+chimney-piece. What was to be done next?</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I turned it over in my mind while I drank
+my brandy-and-water (looking pretty sharp
+at the letter the while), but I couldn’t see
+my way out of it at all. I tried to get
+lodgings in the house, but there had been a
+horse-fair, or something of that sort, and it
+was full. I was obliged to put up somewhere
+else, but I came backwards and forwards to
+the bar for a couple of days, and there was
+the letter, always behind the glass. At last I
+thought I’d write a letter to Mr. Pigeon myself,
+and see what that would do. So I wrote
+one, and posted it, but I purposely addressed it,
+Mr. John Pigeon, instead of Mr. Thomas Pigeon,
+to see what <i>that</i> would do. In the morning
+(a very wet morning it was) I watched the
+postman down the street, and cut into the bar,
+just before he reached the Warwick Arms.
+In he came presently with my letter. ‘Is
+there a Mr. John Pigeon staying here?’
+‘No!—stop a bit though,’ says the barmaid;
+and she took down the letter behind the glass.
+‘No,’ says she, ‘it’s Thomas, and <i>he</i> is not
+staying here. Would you do me a favor, and
+post this for me, as it is so wet?’ The postman
+said Yes; she folded it in another envelope,
+directed it, and gave it him. He put
+it in his hat, and away he went.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I had no difficulty in finding out the
+direction of that letter. It was addressed,
+Mr. Thomas Pigeon, Post-Office, R——, Northamptonshire,
+to be left till called for. Off I
+started directly for R——; I said the same
+at the Post-Office there, as I had said at
+B——; and again I waited three days
+before anybody came. At last another chap
+on horseback came. ‘Any letters for Mr.
+Thomas Pigeon?’ ‘Where do you come
+from?’ ‘New Inn, near R——.’ He got
+the letter, and away <i>he</i> went—at a canter.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I made my enquiries about the New Inn,
+near R——, and hearing it was a solitary sort
+of house, a little in the horse line, about a
+couple of miles from the station, I thought
+I’d go and have a look at it. I found it what
+it had been described, and sauntered in, to
+look about me. The landlady was in the bar,
+and I was trying to get into conversation with
+her; asked her how business was, and spoke
+about the wet weather, and so on; when I
+saw, through an open door, three men sitting
+by the fire in a sort of parlor, or kitchen; and
+one of those men, according to the description
+I had of him, was Tally-ho Thompson!</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I went and sat down among ’em, and
+tried to make things agreeable; but they were
+very shy—wouldn’t talk at all—looked at
+me, and at one another, in a way quite the
+reverse of sociable. I reckoned ’em up, and
+finding that they were all three bigger men
+than me, and considering that their looks
+were ugly—that it was a lonely place—railroad
+station two miles off—and night coming
+on—thought I couldn’t do better than have a
+drop of brandy-and-water to keep my courage
+up. So I called for my brandy-and-water;
+and as I was sitting drinking it by the fire,
+Thompson got up and went out.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Now the difficulty of it was, that I wasn’t
+sure it <i>was</i> Thompson, because I had never set
+eyes on him before; and what I had wanted
+was to be quite certain of him. However,
+there was nothing for it now, but to follow,
+and put a bold face upon it. I found him
+talking, outside in the yard, with the landlady.
+It turned out afterwards, that he was
+wanted by a Northampton officer for something
+else, and that, knowing that officer to
+be pock-marked (as I am myself), he mistook
+me for him. As I have observed, I found
+him talking to the landlady, outside. I put
+my hand upon his shoulder—this way—and
+said, ‘Tally-ho Thompson, it’s no use. I know
+you. I’m an officer from London, and I take
+you into custody for felony!’ ‘That be
+d—d!’ says Tally-ho Thompson.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“We went back into the house, and the
+two friends began to cut up rough, and their
+looks didn’t please me at all, I assure you.
+‘Let the man go. What are you going to do
+with him?’ ‘I’ll tell you what I’m going
+to do with him. I’m going to take him to
+London to-night, as sure as I’m alive. I’m
+not alone here, whatever you may think.
+You mind your own business, and keep yourselves
+to yourselves. It’ll be better for you,
+for I know you both very well.’ <i>I</i>‘d never
+seen or heard of ’em in all my life, but my
+bouncing cowed ’em a bit, and they kept off,
+while Thompson was making ready to go. I
+thought to myself, however, that they might
+be coming after me on the dark road, to rescue
+Thompson; so I said to the landlady, ‘What
+men have you got in the house, Missis?’ ‘We
+haven’t got no men here,’ she says, sulkily.
+‘You have got an ostler, I suppose?’ ‘Yes,
+we’ve got an ostler.’ ‘Let me see him.’
+Presently he came, and a shaggy-headed
+young fellow he was. ‘Now attend to me,
+young man,’ says I; ‘I’m a Detective Officer
+from London. This man’s name is Thompson.
+I have taken him into custody for felony. I’m
+going to take him to the railroad station. I call
+upon you in the Queen’s name to assist me;
+and mind you, my friend, you’ll get yourself
+into more trouble than you know of, if you
+don’t!’ You never saw a person open his eyes
+so wide. ‘Now, Thompson, come along!’ says
+I. But when I took out the handcuffs, Thompson
+cries, ‘No! None of that! I won’t stand
+<i>them</i>! I’ll go along with you quiet, but I won’t
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_413'>413</span>bear none of that!’ ‘Tally-ho Thompson,’
+I said, ‘I’m willing to behave as a man to
+you, if you are willing to behave as a man to
+me. Give me your word that you’ll come
+peaceably along, and I don’t want to handcuff
+you.’ ‘I will,’ says Thompson, ‘but I’ll have
+a glass of brandy first.’ ‘I don’t care if I’ve
+another,’ said I. ‘We’ll have two more,
+Missis,’ said the friends, ‘and con-found you,
+Constable, you’ll give your man a drop, won’t
+you?’ I was agreeable to that, so we had it
+all round, and then my man and I took
+Tally-ho Thompson safe to the railroad, and I
+carried him to London that night. He was
+afterwards acquitted, on account of a defect
+in the evidence; and I understand he always
+praises me up to the skies, and says I’m one
+of the best of men.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>This story coming to a termination amidst
+general applause, Inspector Wield, after a little
+grave smoking, fixes his eye on his host, and
+thus delivers himself:</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“It wasn’t a bad plant that of mine, on
+Fikey, the man accused of forging the Sou’
+Western Railway debentures—it was only
+t’other day—because the reason why? I’ll
+tell you.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I had information that Fikey and his
+brother kept a factory over yonder there,”
+indicating any region on the Surrey side of
+the river, “where he bought second-hand carriages;
+so after I’d tried in vain to get hold
+of him by other means, I wrote him a letter
+in an assumed name, saying that I’d got a
+horse and shay to dispose of, and would drive
+down next day, that he might view the lot,
+and make an offer—very reasonable it was, I
+said—a reg’lar bargain. Straw and me then
+went off to a friend of mine that’s in the
+livery and job business, and hired a turn-out
+for the day, a precious smart turn-out, it was—quite
+a slap-up thing! Down we drove,
+accordingly, with a friend (who’s not in the
+Force himself); and leaving my friend in the
+shay near a public-house, to take care of the
+horse, we went to the factory, which was some
+little way off. In the factory, there was a
+number of strong fellows at work, and after
+reckoning ’em up, it was clear to me that it
+wouldn’t do to try it on there. They were
+too many for us. We must get our man out
+of doors. ‘Mr. Fikey at home?’ ‘No, he
+ain’t.’ ‘Expected home soon?’ ‘Why, no,
+not soon.’ ‘Ah! is his brother here?’ ‘<i>I</i>’m
+his brother.’ ‘Oh! well, this is an ill-conwenience,
+this is. I wrote him a letter yesterday,
+saying I’d got a little turn-out to dispose
+of, and I’ve took the trouble to bring the
+turn-out down, a’ purpose, and now he ain’t
+in the way.’ ‘No, he an’t in the way. You
+couldn’t make it convenient to call again, could
+you?’ ‘Why, no, I couldn’t. I want to sell;
+that’s the fact; and I can’t put it off. Could
+you find him anywheres?’ At first he said
+No, he couldn’t, and then he wasn’t sure
+about it, and then he’d go and try. So, at
+last he went up-stairs, where there was a sort
+of loft, and presently down comes my man
+himself, in his shirt sleeves.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“‘Well,’ he says, ‘this seems to be rayther
+a pressing matter of yours.’ ‘Yes,’ I says, ‘it
+<i>is</i> rayther a pressing matter, and you’ll find it
+a bargain—dirt-cheap.’ ‘I ain’t in partickler
+want of a bargain just now,’ he says, ‘but
+where is it!’ ‘Why,’ I says, ‘the turn-out’s
+just outside. Come and look at it.’ He
+hasn’t any suspicions, and away we go. And
+the first thing that happens is, that the
+horse runs away with my friend (who knows
+no more of driving than a child) when he
+takes a little trot along the road to show
+his paces. You never saw such a game in
+your life!</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“When the bolt is over, and the turn-out has
+come to a stand-still again, Fikey walks round
+and round it, as grave as a judge—me too.
+‘There, Sir!’ I says. ‘There’s a neat thing!’
+‘It an’t a bad style of thing,’ he says. ‘I
+believe you,’ says I. ‘And there’s a horse!’—for
+I saw him looking at it. ‘Rising eight!’
+I says, rubbing his fore-legs. (Bless you,
+there an’t a man in the world knows less of
+horses than I do, but I’d heard my friend at
+the Livery Stables say he was eight year old,
+so I says, as knowing as possible, ‘Rising
+Eight.’) ‘Rising eight, is he?’ says he.
+‘Rising eight,’ says I. ‘Well,’ he says, ‘what
+do you want for it?’ ‘Why, the first and last
+figure for the whole concern is five-and-twenty
+pound!’ ‘That’s very cheap!’ he says, looking
+at me. ‘An’t it?’ I says. ‘I told you it
+was a bargain! Now, without any higgling
+and haggling about it, what I want is to sell,
+and that’s my price. Further, I’ll make it
+easy to you, and take half the money down,
+and you can do a bit of stiff<a id='r1'></a><a href='#f1' class='c006'><sup>[1]</sup></a> for the balance.’
+‘Well,’ he says again, ‘that’s very cheap.’
+‘I believe you,’ says I; ‘get in and try it, and
+you’ll buy it. Come! take a trial!’</p>
+
+<div class='footnote' id='f1'>
+<p class='c005'><a href='#r1'>1</a>. Give a bill.</p>
+</div>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Ecod, he gets in, and we get in, and we
+drive along the road, to show him to one of
+the railway clerks that was hid in the public-house
+window to identify him. But the clerk
+was bothered, and didn’t know whether it
+was him, or wasn’t—because the reason why?
+I’ll tell you,—on account of his having shaved
+his whiskers. ‘It’s a clever little horse,’ he
+says, ‘and trots well; and the shay runs
+light.’ ‘Not a doubt about it,’ I says. ‘And
+now, Mr. Fikey, I may as well make it all
+right, without wasting any more of your time.
+The fact is, I’m Inspector Wield, and you’re
+my prisoner.’ ‘You don’t mean that?’ he
+says. ‘I do, indeed.’ ‘Then burn my body,’
+says Fikey, ‘if this ain’t <i>too</i> bad!’</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Perhaps you never saw a man so knocked
+over with surprise. ‘I hope you’ll let me
+have my coat?’ he says. ‘By all means.’
+‘Well, then, let’s drive to the factory.’
+‘Why, not exactly that, I think,’ said I;
+‘I’ve been there, once before, to-day. Suppose
+we send for it,’ He saw it was no go,
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_414'>414</span>so he sent for it, and put it on, and we drove
+him up to London, comfortable.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>This reminiscence is in the height of its
+success, when a general proposal is made to
+the fresh-complexioned, smooth-faced officer,
+with the strange air of simplicity, to tell the
+“Butcher’s story.” But we must reserve the
+Butcher’s story, together with another not
+less curious in its way, for a concluding paper.</p>
+
+<div class='chapter'>
+ <h2 class='c003'>“SWINGING THE SHIP.”<br> <span class='c007'>A VISIT TO THE COMPASS OBSERVATORY.</span></h2>
+</div>
+
+<p class='c004'>The noble ship with her floating battery of
+heavy guns, her hundreds of seamen, smart
+and brave, her powder, shot, and shell for
+destroying an enemy, and her tons of provender
+to supply her crew; with her anxious
+captain and aspiring lieutenants, mates,
+middys, warrant officers, and her pipeclayed
+marines are on board. The long pennon whips
+the winds; the hurry, bustle, and noise of
+preparation has subsided into the quietude of
+everything in its place; when the word passes
+that she is “Ready for Sea.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Next morning the newspapers find just
+a line and a half in their naval corner for
+the announcement,—“Her Majesty’s ship
+Unutterable, 120 guns, went out of harbour
+yesterday. After she has been swung, and
+had her compasses adjusted, she will sail for
+the Pacific.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“<i>Swing</i> a hundred and twenty gun ship?”
+says the good citizen interrogatively to himself,
+as he devours his coffee and his newspaper at
+breakfast. He pays his taxes and is proud of
+Britannia and the British navy, but his admiration
+of the nautical does not help him to a
+solution. “After she has been swung!” he
+repeats, and then more immediate affairs draw
+off his attention, and he leaves the Unutterable
+to undergo the mysterious. He turns to the
+debates.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Naval officers are of course more wise on
+the point, and some of them have more
+knowledge of the operation than liking for it.
+It’s apt to spoil the paint now and then, and
+gives trouble, and upsets some of their arrangements.
+Many, it must be confessed, have
+more experience than science in their composition,
+and when they let out their true
+feeling, indulge, perhaps, in a half growl, in
+which the words “new-fangled” and “deal of
+trouble” might be heard. But the operation
+goes on nevertheless, and little doubt but the
+toil is forgotten and the growl repented when—far,
+far at sea, a murky sky shuts out the
+sun and the stars, and forbids heaven to tell
+the navigator where he is—with a waste of
+waters, hundreds, perhaps thousands of miles
+around him, he has nought but his figures and
+his little trembling needles of magnetised iron
+to guide him on his way; to direct him wide
+of the sunken rock and the sandy shoal as he
+nears the wished-for coast.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The loss of British ships by wreck has been
+stated at between five and six hundred in a
+year—or about “a ship and a half-a-day.”
+This terrible loss has been ascribed to many
+causes—to the tides and currents of the ocean;
+to imperfect logs; inaccurate charts; unsteady
+steerage; inattention to the lead; stress of
+weather; defective ships, and defective
+management; but last, if not greatest, says
+Captain Johnson, who gives this catalogue of
+sources of disaster, we have the errors of the
+compass. These errors were noticed—now
+nearly a couple of centuries ago, and from
+those days to the present time careful mariners
+have often called attention to the subject.
+“Officers in charge of convoys during the
+war,” continues Captain Johnson, “will probably
+remember the care with which the
+general signal was displayed at sunset, to
+steer a given course during the night,” with
+what alacrity that signal was repeated by the
+ships of war in their stations, and answered
+by every merchant-vessel in the fleet; and
+they will also possibly remember with what
+surprise,—nay, indignation,—they observed
+when daylight came, almost the entire convoy
+dispersed over the ocean as far as the eye
+could reach, and mayhap a suspicious looking
+stranger or two escorting those farthest away,
+further astray, in despite of all the shots fired
+during a morning watch to recall them. That
+such dispersements were in part attributable
+to the differences of the compasses in each
+ship, there can be no doubt; but the greatest
+delinquents in this particular, in all probability,
+were not the merchant vessels, but
+rather the ships of war; <i>the attractive power
+of their guns upon the compasses</i> being now a
+well-known and constantly proved fact.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The Apollo frigate, and forty merchantmen
+of her convoy, in 1803 were wrecked together
+on the coast of Portugal, when they believed
+themselves to be two hundred miles to the
+westward. The error of the frigate’s compasses
+is believed to have been the cause of the
+disaster; and a similar belief exists with
+respect to the dreadful wrecks of our line of battle
+ships on the coasts of Jutland and
+Holland in 1811. The wreck of the Reliance,
+Indiaman, on the coast of France, when one
+hundred and nine lives were lost, in 1842, is
+another painful accident ascribed to errors of
+the compasses induced by the presence on
+board of a large iron tank forty-six feet long,
+the attraction of which had been overlooked—for
+a hollow tank has a magnetic influence
+as great as a solid mass of the same external
+dimensions—and such a mass would weigh
+four hundred and sixty-eight tons.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>These errors in the needle that guides the
+ship, so dangerous in their results, at last attracted
+official attention in England. Inquiries
+were extended in various directions, and it
+was found that “in some ships the deviation
+was small; in others it was large enough to
+cause the loss of a ship, even during a short
+run; whilst in others, again, from the position
+of some iron stancheon, bolt or bar, or stand
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_415'>415</span>of arms, the error might be changed in the
+opposite direction; so that the deviation in
+one vessel was not a guide to its amount or
+direction in another; and that there was no
+other remedy but ascertaining the fact by
+direct experiment in each ship.” These facts
+were recognised by a committee of English
+officers, appointed to investigate the matter,
+one of whom was the Captain Johnson whom
+we have already quoted, and of whose subsequent
+labours we shall have further presently
+to speak.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>With these words of explanatory preface,
+let us set out on a visit to the establishment
+where the dangers of those afloat are sought
+to be lessened by scientific investigations on
+shore.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>About two miles and a half eastwards from
+the Greenwich Observatory, in the picturesque
+parish of Charlton, and on the extreme corner
+of the high land that runs from Blackheath,
+till it juts out close upon the banks of the
+Thames—stands the building we are in
+search of. Those who may try to discover it
+will probably find some little difficulty in the
+task, for the place is unpretending in outward
+aspect, and is little known in the neighbourhood;
+has never before been publicly described—except,
+perhaps, in those unread publications
+called Blue Books, and in the technical
+volume of the naval officer who has charge of
+this sanctum of science.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>It is called the Compass Observatory; and
+its locality may probably be more completely
+indicated by saying that it is not very distant
+from, though on a far higher level than that
+corner of the Woolwich Dockyard whence the
+great chimney soars up like a rival monument
+to that on Fish Street Hill, and where the
+engine that sets the Dockyard Machines in
+motion hums like a bee of forty-horse power.
+When the place is reached, those who expect
+to see “a public building,” will be disappointed;
+those who like to find that Science
+may abide in small and humble places,
+will be pleased. A long strip of newly-reclaimed
+land, a detached brick house, and in
+its rear, an octagonal wooden structure of
+little greater outward pretensions than a
+citizen’s “summer house,” make up the whole
+establishment.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Passing under the pleasant shade of two
+fine oak trees, and then between a collection
+of very promising roses, we enter the
+house. Once inside, we see that the spirit of
+order, regularity, and neatness, is there
+paramount. The exactitude requisite for
+scientific observation, gives a habit of exactness
+in other things. In one room we perceive
+a galvanic battery ready for experiments; a
+disc of iron for showing a now defunct mode
+of steadying the vibrations of the compass; a
+specimen of the mixed iron and wood braced
+together as they are now employed in the
+construction of first-class ships of the Royal
+Navy, like the Queen’s Yacht; and more,
+interesting than all the rest, a copper bowl,
+contrived by Arago, for stilling the irritability
+(so to speak) of the magnetic needle.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The French astronomer and ex-minister of
+the Provisional Government here claims our
+admiration of his scientific skill, and his work
+suggests the reflexion how much more pleasant
+the calm pursuit of nature’s laws must
+be to such a man, than the turbulent effort
+to enact rules and constitutions for an impetuous
+and changeable people. Passing from
+this room to another, we find books, and
+charts, and maps, on which are laid down the
+magnetic currents over the great oceans, and
+amongst its instrumental relics, a magnetic
+needle that belonged to poor Captain Cook.
+It is a plain small bar of steel in a rough
+wooden case, but to the mariner who loves
+his craft and its heroes, this morsel of iron
+has an interest greater than the most perfect
+of nautical inventions—for Cook was a seaman
+who achieved great ends with humble means
+and from humble beginnings. A third room
+is full of compasses of all sorts, sizes, and
+kinds, from China, from Denmark, from
+France; from the most rude and simple, to
+the most complex and finished. All the
+schemes and plans ever proposed for improving
+this useful invention are here preserved.
+Many of the contrivances have been
+discovered more than once. A sanguine
+theorist completes what to him is perfectly
+new. Certain that he is to be immortalised
+and enriched, he sets off to the Observatory
+with his treasure, to reveal his grand secret,
+and receive the anticipated reward. He is
+shown into the compass-room, and there,—horror
+of horrors,—upon the table, amidst a
+host of others, there is an old discarded
+instrument the very counterpart of his own!
+It was made, and tried, and discarded, years
+ago.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>From the main brick building we pass
+through another line of roses, and under a
+bower, boasting some fifty different varieties
+of that charming flower, to the wooden
+structure in the rear, which is, in fact, the
+Observatory.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>This building is entirely free from iron.
+It is approached by stone steps; the door has
+a pure copper lock, which being opened by a
+copper key, swings on copper hinges to admit
+the visitor after he has first cleared the dirt
+from his shoes upon a copper scraper. Nearly
+facing the door is a stove to keep up the
+temperature in cold weather. It looks black
+enough, and has a black funnel. When the
+visitor is told that Captain Johnson has his
+coat-buttons carefully made without any iron
+shank concealed under their silken cover;
+and that his assistant, Mr. Brunton, repudiates
+buttons to his jacket altogether, and has
+pockets guiltless of a knife; he is apt to turn
+to the stove, and hint the presence there of
+the forbidden metal.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Ah, ah!” is the reply, it looks like iron
+sure enough; but the fireplace, the chimney,
+the poker, the shovel, are all alike. Nothing
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_416'>416</span>but copper, copper, pure copper. This suggests
+an anecdote. When the operations in
+this Compass Observatory were first commenced,
+there was found to be a small variation
+in the magnet. The instruments were readjusted;
+their character was investigated, their
+construction re-examined; other observations
+were made—but still the variation continued.
+Pockets were searched for knives; the garden
+looked over to see that no stray spade or
+rake had been left outside the building, yet
+near enough for mischief. Nothing could be
+discovered. At length the <i>brass</i> bolt on the
+window was suspected; and though brass had
+a good character, not being thought capable
+of coaxing the magnet from its truth, it was,
+in despair of finding any other delinquent,
+unscrewed from its position. No sooner was
+this done, than the wayward needle returned
+to its true position; the brass bolt was
+ejected in disgrace, and no morsel of the
+brazen metal has since been allowed to show
+itself within the precincts of the building
+sacred to the mysterious fluid that draws the
+iron needle to the North.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Once inside the Observatory, the first impression
+is one of isolation and quietude.
+Look up to the wooden roof, and you see two
+shutters, to be opened when an observation is
+to be made upon a star. Through the floor
+rise three pedestals of masonry, built solidly
+from the earth, and isolated from the Observatory
+floor, so that no vibration may be communicated
+to them. All three stand in a row,
+running north and south. The object of two
+of them is to support with complete steadiness
+and truth two instruments for determining,
+at any moment of time, the exact magnetic
+north, whilst the third pedestal holds one by
+one the compasses brought there to be tested.
+The most northern of these three narrow
+stone tables is, in fact, a bed of trial—a place
+of ordeal—whilst the other two support the
+instrumental judges, who are to pass sentence
+upon the fluttering needles brought
+under their unyielding gaze. The test is a
+severe one. It is easy, with proper means, to
+get the true magnetic north with a fixed
+instrument on shore, but to make something
+that shall tell it with equal truth upon the
+deck of a ship, as it heaves and tosses, and
+plunges on the sea, is a very different thing.
+Yet, instruments equal to such triumphs of
+skill are obtained, and in this place it is that
+their qualities are first investigated. The
+south pedestal has upon it a tall tube of glass,
+within which there hang some long fibres of
+untwisted silk, supporting a magnetic tube so
+beautifully poised, that it obeys without let
+or hindrance its natural tendency towards
+the magnetic north. This tubular magnet
+has at one end a glass on which a scale
+and figures are engraved, but so fine and
+small as to be with difficulty seen by the naked
+eye. The second pedestal supports a telescope,
+with which the observer looks down
+the tubular throat of the magnet towards this
+tiny scale on the glass at its extremity. Our
+friends, the “spiders,” have contributed some
+lines to the telescope, and the centre one of
+these crosses the exact figure showing the
+magnetic position at the moment.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>With this figure in his mind, the telescope
+and the observer’s eye are poised in the
+opposite direction, through the window of
+the Observatory, towards a spot some half
+mile to the north, called Cox’s Mount; an
+eminence on which a wall has been raised to
+bear a numbered scale similar to that on the
+magnet—with this difference—that the one is
+very minute, and the other very large. To
+the corresponding figure on the distant wall
+the instrument is directed, and being thus
+pointed towards the true magnetic north, it is
+brought to bear upon the pivot of the compass—which
+by this time occupies a place on the
+top of the third pedestal to be tested. Without
+a complex description, and the free use of
+scientific terms, it would be perhaps impossible
+to convey a thoroughly exact conception of the
+steps of the whole process. Such a detail would
+be not only too technical, but unnecessary,
+here. It will be enough in general terms to
+say, therefore, that the indication obtained
+from a star, or from the instrument on the
+south pedestal, called the collimator, is, by
+means of the instrument in the centre, combined
+with a mark upon a distant object, and
+then brought down to prove the true powers
+of the compass placed on the third pedestal.
+It is a beautifully exact operation. The
+silence of isolation, the steadiness of stone
+tables and practised operators, the most beautifully
+constructed instruments, are combined
+to ensure accurate realities as a result. The
+tests are so varied, and so often repeated, that
+no error can escape, and the compass, when it
+leaves the building to begin its adventures
+afloat, commences its career with an irreproachable
+character as a Standard Compass
+of the Royal Navy—to be, on board the ship
+of war to which it is sent, a kind of master
+instrument of reference, by which ruder and
+cheaper compasses may be checked and regulated.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Just as the history of the stars and of the
+variations of the magnet is registered and
+posted up at the Greenwich Observatory, so is
+that of the compasses entered up here. Every
+compass that passes its examination may be
+said to receive its commission, and be appointed
+to a ship. Its number is taken; its vessel
+and destination are noted, and, subsequently,
+its length of service. On its return home from
+successive trips, it comes back to this place,
+when its character is again investigated and
+note made of any loss of magnetic power, of
+any deviations it may have exhibited, how it
+may have lost and how gained, and of any
+other circumstances showing either improvement
+or deterioration. Now and then one is
+blacklisted, but this seldom happens; the
+greatest loss yet noted being 30 minutes. The
+Standard Compasses cost, when made new,
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_417'>417</span>with tripod and all complete, 25<i>l.</i> each. After
+they have been some years in service afloat,
+they are sent into hospital for overhaul and
+repair. This costs generally 4<i>l.</i> or 5<i>l.</i>, and
+they are then again as good as ever, and ready
+to guide another ship on her way over the
+mighty waters. The scientific part of the
+fittings of a ship of war, though of greatest
+value, are thus of lowest cost. A Standard
+Compass is, indeed, a beautiful result of human
+ingenuity. Generations of seamen and men
+of science have discussed the best form and
+materials, and the best mode of suspending
+the needle, that it may most freely and truly
+follow its mysterious love for the north. From
+the days of the old adventurers round the
+globe, to the date of the last voyages to the
+Arctic regions, successive sea captains have
+thought, and watched, and suggested, and the
+Standard Compass of the English Navy combines,
+it is believed, all that is best in all their
+thinking. After the Observatory was established,
+and one of its duties had been defined
+to be to pursue investigations on the deviation
+of the needle, it was thought desirable to have
+specimens of the instruments used in the war
+ships of other naval nations. With the open
+liberality that unites in brotherhood the scientific
+men of all countries, France and
+Denmark sent specimens of what their best
+men had succeeded in perfecting for the use
+of their navies. These instruments are very
+good, and attract deserved attention in the
+observatory-collection of specimens. The
+Frenchman is scientific, simple, and with an
+excellent contrivance for a moveable agate
+plane to avoid friction in the motion of the
+needle. The Dane is a good substantial instrument,
+even more excellently finished than
+the compasses issued to our navy.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The English Compass is, however, believed
+with good reason to be the best yet contrived.
+It has grown up to its present excellence by
+slow degrees. Human ingenuity has been
+taxed to its utmost, and it has passed to its
+present perfection through the various trials
+of needles of all sorts of shapes swung in all
+sorts of ways, and by springs, and floating
+cards, modifying the instrument to the varying
+conditions of a small boat tossing on waves,
+or a line of battle ship jarring under the
+recoil of a broadside. And now we find our
+Compass-needle made of iron that, being got
+from the Swedish mines, has travelled to
+Strasbourg to be prepared for clock springs;
+thence to Paris, to be still more highly
+wrought by the watchmaker; and then to
+London, to take its sea-going shape. Four
+bars of this choice metal, or of shear-steel of
+equally fine quality, are ranged edgewise
+under a card, thickened and stiffened yet
+kept transparent by a sheet of mica, brought
+from the Russian mines; this card moves
+upon a point made of a metal harder than
+steel, and incapable of corrosion; and which
+sometimes, under the name of Iridium, but
+more correctly under that of “native alloy,”
+is found by the refiners as they smelt the
+platinum and silver gained from the Ural
+Mountains or the mines of Spain. The
+Iridium or alloy comes to the workshop
+in the tiniest of glass bottles—bottles as
+small round as a goose-quill, and about
+an inch long—in morsels not much bigger
+than a pin’s head, and weighing each less
+than half a grain. Some of these prove
+too soft, some too spongy, some too brittle,
+but at last one is found hard and good, and
+it is soldered upon the pivot, that, when
+sharpened and polished, is to work upon a
+cap, formed of a ruby, brought from the
+East. A bowl of the metal suggested by
+the French philosopher being prepared, from
+the produce of the mines of Cornwall; and
+the science of the English philosopher, and
+the skill of the English workman, having
+brought all these things into their proper
+shape and places; we have, as the result, the
+Standard Compass, whose fitness to guide her
+Majesty’s ship the Unutterable, we have just
+seen tested by Captain Johnson at the Woolwich
+Compass Observatory.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Our favourite newspaper has just stated
+that that gallant ship “is now at Greenhithe
+waiting to have her compasses adjusted.” So,
+then, the instruments so accurate at the
+Observatory a few days ago, are all wrong
+again on shipboard. Just so. The moment
+they get to their places afloat, their fidelity
+to the north wavers,—in one ship more,
+in another less; but in all in a greater or
+smaller degree in proportion to the quantity
+of iron used in the construction of the vessel,
+and the nearness of that metal to the compasses;
+in proportion to the number of the
+iron guns and the total weight of metal
+carried; to the length of the funnel in steamships,
+and to the condition of that funnel
+whether upright or hauled down. All this
+is both new and strange enough. We have
+learnt already what loss of ships convoyed
+and ships wrecked has arisen from these
+deviations: deviations long neglected on
+board all vessels and to this hour unrecognised
+or unattended to in our mercantile
+marine! Since the Royal Navy, however,
+has a scientific officer, Captain Johnson, especially
+employed in attending to the important
+duty of adjusting the compasses: let
+us go with him and his assistant, Mr. Brunton,
+from the Compass Observatory to the
+anchorage at Greenhithe, and see how he
+will “swing” the gallant line of battle ship,
+the Unutterable.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The trip occupies a very short time, for we
+have steam at command. Arrived in the
+Reach, we find five floating buoys anchored in
+the stream, one forming a centre, and four
+being disposed at equal distances about it,
+just as the five pips are placed upon a card—say
+the five of spades. The good ship to be
+operated upon is already fast by the head to
+the centre buoy, and Captain Johnson having
+mounted her deck, and his assistant, Mr.
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_418'>418</span>Brunton, having been rowed ashore, a rope is
+run out from the ship’s stern and made fast to
+one of the corner buoys. The Standard Compass
+being fixed in the proper position which
+it is to occupy in the ship, neither too high nor
+too low, and the guns and other iron being
+round about it, as they are to remain during
+the voyage, the mooring ropes are adjusted,
+and the ship’s head is put due north. Meanwhile,
+Mr. Brunton has set up a compass
+ashore, and all being ready, Captain Johnson,
+at a given moment, observes the bearing of
+a distant object—the Tower at Shooter’s Hill—noting
+the bearing of the needle on board.
+At that instant the pennant that floated at
+the mast-head is hauled down from the truck.
+This being the concerted signal, at the same
+second of time the assistant ashore observed
+the needle of his compass. The two instruments
+vary, and the deviation of that on
+board, compared with that ashore, is due to
+the iron of the ship. The stern ropes are
+hauled from one buoy to another, and again
+made fast, the ship’s head now pointing
+in another direction. The observations and
+the signals are repeated. Each deviation of the
+ship’s compass is carefully noted upon a card
+previously prepared for the purpose. The
+ship’s stern is then hauled round to the third
+outside buoy, and the compasses being again
+examined, she is next hauled round to the
+fourth buoy. Her head by this time has been
+north, east, south, west; on each point the
+deviations of her compasses have been tested,
+noted, and the card shows their character and
+proper adjustment. <i>The ship has been swung.</i>
+Science has done its best for her, and the
+word is given to heave anchor, for she is now
+truly “Ready for Sea.”</p>
+
+<div class='chapter'>
+ <h2 class='c003'>AN EXPLORING ADVENTURE.</h2>
+</div>
+
+<p class='c004'>The Litany of a Bushman on the Borders
+might well run, “From native dogs, from
+scabby sheep, from blacks, from droughts,
+from governors’ proclamations, good Lord,
+deliver us.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The droughts come in their appointed
+season, and the day will be, when wells
+and tanks and aqueducts will redeem many
+a part from the curse of periodical barrenness:
+the blacks soon tame or fade before
+the white man’s face; unfortunately the
+seat of the native dogs, and home-bred or
+town-bred governing crotchets are more plentiful
+in long settled than new found countries.
+At any rate, I have experienced them all,
+and now give the following passage of my
+life for the benefit of the gentlemen “who
+live at home at ease,” hatching theories for
+our good—Heaven help their silliness!</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>I had been two years comfortably settled
+with a nice lot of cattle and sheep, part my
+own, part on “thirds,” when the people
+south of me began to complain of drought.
+<i>I</i> had enough feed and water; the question
+was, whether it would last.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>I called my bullock-driver, Bald-faced
+Dick, into consultation. He was laid up at
+the time with a broken leg. Dick strongly
+advised looking for a new station “to the
+nor’ard.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The sheep would do for months, but he
+thought we were overstocked with cattle. I
+had a good deal of confidence in Dick’s
+judgment; for he was a “first fleeter,” that
+is, came over with Governor Phillips in the
+first fleet; had seen everything in the colony,
+both good and bad; had, it was whispered,
+in early years fled from a flogging master, and
+lived, some said, with the blacks; others
+averred with a party of Gully-rakers (cattle-stealers);
+he swore horridly, was dangerous
+when he had drunk too much rum, but was a
+thorough Bushman; by the stars, or by sun,
+and the fall of the land, could find his way
+anywhere by day or night, understood all
+kinds of stock, and could make bullocks understand
+him. He knew every roving character
+in the colony, the quality of every station, and
+more about the far interior than he chose to
+tell to every one. With all his coarseness, he
+was generous and good-natured, and when
+well paid, and fairly and strictly treated, stood
+upon “Bush honour,” and could be thoroughly
+depended on.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Having had an opportunity of serving him
+in a rather serious matter previous to his
+entering my service, I was pretty sure of his
+best advice.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The end of it was, for a promise of five
+pounds he obtained from a friend of his a description
+of a country hitherto unsettled, and
+first-rate for cattle. These men, who can
+neither read nor write, have often a talent for
+description, which is astonishing.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Having heard a minute detail of the
+“pack,” and studied a sort of map drawn on
+the lid of a tea-chest with a burned stick, I
+decided on exploring with my overseer, Jem
+Carden, and, if successful, returning for the
+cattle and drags, all loaded for founding a
+station.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>We only took our guns and tomahawks,
+with tea, sugar, a salt tongue, and small
+damper ready baked, being determined to
+make long marches, starting early, camping
+at mid-day, and marching again in the evening
+as long as it was light.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Our first stage was only twenty-five miles to
+young Marson’s cattle-station. Marson was a
+cadet, of a noble family, and having been too
+fast at home and in India as a cavalry subaltern,
+had been sent out with a fair capital
+to Australia, under the idea that a fortune
+was to be had for asking, and no means of
+expense open in the Bush. What money he
+did not leave in the bars and billiard rooms of
+Sydney, he invested in a herd of six hundred
+cattle; to look after these, he had four men,
+whom he engaged, one because he could fight,
+another because he could sing, and all because
+they flattered him. With these fellows he
+lived upon terms of perfect equality, with a
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_419'>419</span>keg of rum continually on the tap. Then, for
+want of better society, he made his hut the
+rendezvous of a tribe of tame blacks.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>We found him sitting on the floor in a pair
+of trowsers and ragged shirt, unwashed, uncombed,
+pale-faced and red-eyed, surrounded
+by half-a-dozen black gins (his sultanas), a lot
+of dogs, poultry, a tame kangaroo, and two of
+his men. The floor was littered with quart
+pots, lumps of fat, and damper outside the
+hut; the relations of the black ladies had
+made a fire, and were cooking a piece of a
+fine young heifer. What with the jabbering
+of the gins, the singing and swearing of the
+men, and the yelping of the dogs, it was no
+place for a quiet meal, so we only stayed long
+enough to drink a pot of tea, so as not to
+offend, and passed on to camp an hour under
+the shade of a thicket near the river.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Marson having, with the assistance of his
+black friends, consumed all his stock, has
+returned home; and, I hear, asserts everywhere
+that Australia is not a country a
+gentleman can live in.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Our course next, after crossing the dividing
+range, lay over a very flat country, all burned
+up as far as the eye could reach,—a perfect
+desert of sand. The chain of pools which
+formed the river after rain, were nearly choked
+up by the putrifying carcases of cattle,
+smothered in fighting for water. The air was
+poisonous; the horses sank fetlock-deep at
+every stride; the blazing sun was reflected
+back from the hot sand with an intensity that
+almost blinded our half-shut eyes. After
+three hours of this misery, we struck into a
+better country, and soon after came up to the
+camp of a squatter, who had been forced
+forward by the drought. He had marked
+out about twenty miles along the river for his
+run,—a pretty good slice, I thought, when,
+before turning back, he said, “That is all I
+want.” It was no business of ours, as we
+had views further a-field. For three days we
+pushed on, making from thirty to forty miles
+a day, without seeing anything exactly to our
+mind. We rode over arid plains, dotted with
+scrubby brushwood, then up precipitous hills;
+now leaping, now clambering down and up,
+and now riding round to avoid dry gullies
+and ravines; passing occasionally breaks of
+green pasture, but insufficiently watered for
+my purpose. Sometimes our way lay along
+mountain sides, sometimes in the dry bed of
+a torrent. Sometimes huge boulders interrupted
+our course, sometimes the gigantic
+trunks of fallen trees. More than once we
+had to steer through a forest of the monotonous,
+shadeless gum, with its lofty, dazzlingly
+white trunks festooned with the brown, curly
+bark of the previous year, and its parasol-like
+but shadeless branches, where crimson,
+green, and snowy parrot tribes shrieked and
+whistled among the evergreen leaves. It is
+impossible to conceive anything more gorgeous
+than these birds as they fluttered in the sun;
+but I confess that, “on serious thoughts
+intent,” during this journey, they were more
+often associated with my ideas of supper than
+anything else.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The evening of the third day, we found
+ourselves obliged to camp down with a scanty
+supply of brackish water, and no signs of any
+living thing. The next day was worse; a
+land of silence and desolation, where it seemed
+as if mountains had been crumbled up and
+scattered about in hills and lumps. The dry
+earth cracked and yawned in all directions.
+Failing to find water, we camped down,
+parched, weary, silent, but not despairing.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The next morning the horses were gone.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>I cannot find words to describe what we
+suffered in the subsequent twelve hours. I
+had walked until my feet were one mass of
+blisters, and was ready to lie down and die
+ten times in the day; but somehow I found
+strength to walk, always chewing a bullet.
+At length, at nightfall, we found our horses;
+and, nearly at the same time, to crown our
+delight—water. At the sight of this, we
+both involuntarily sank down on our knees
+to return thanks for life saved.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The next morning, after a scanty breakfast,
+we set to work, and by dint of cutting away
+with axe and jack-knife, at the expense of
+clothes and skin, through a brigalow scrub
+for half a mile, found our way into a gap
+through which our track lay, and which we
+had missed. It led straight to the dividing
+range.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>After crossing five miles from the foot of
+the range, through a barren tract, our eyes
+and hearts were suddenly rejoiced by the
+sight of the wished-for land.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>A plain, covered with fine green barley-grass,
+as high as our horses’ heads, and
+sprinkled over with the myal shrub, which
+cattle and sheep will eat and thrive on, even
+without grass. Such was the delicious prospect
+before us. A flood had evidently but
+lately subsided, for lagoons full of water were
+scattered all about; a river running at the
+rate of five miles an hour, serpentined as far
+as the eye could see, from which the water-fowl
+fluttered up as we passed; the eagle hawks were
+sweeping along after flocks of quail, and mobs
+of kangaroos hopping about like huge rabbits.
+There was not a sign of horn or hoof anywhere,
+but it was evident the aborigines were
+numerous, for there were paths worn down
+where they had been in the habit of travelling,
+from one angle of the river to another; we
+could trace their footmarks and of all sizes, and
+thereupon we unslung our guns and looked at
+the priming. Altogether I thought I had
+discovered the finest place for a cattle-station
+in the colony; I found out afterwards that
+the first appearance of a new country before it
+has been stocked is not to be depended on.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>We formed a camp in an angle of the
+river, so as to have protection on three sides,
+ventured, in spite of the danger, to light a
+fire and cook some game. Oh, how delicious
+was that meal! As I lay near the river’s
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_420'>420</span>edge, peeping through the tall grass, I saw
+the horrid emus, that rare and soon to be
+extinct bird, come down the slopes on the
+opposite side to drink in numbers; a sure
+sign that white men were as yet strangers to
+these plains.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>We spent some days in examination, and
+during the exploration met with adventures
+with the aborigines, I will not now relate.
+Having marked a station with my initials,
+and in returning made out a route practicable
+for drays, by which I afterwards made
+my way with a large herd of cattle, although
+not without enduring more than I could tell
+in a few lines.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Our horses having picked up their flesh in
+a fortnight’s spell on the green plains, we got
+back at a rattling pace, but, before arriving
+home, met with an adventure I shall not soon
+forget. It was at the first station we reached
+after crossing the “barrens” that divided our
+newly discovered country. A hut had just
+been built for the Stockman, a big strong
+Irishman, more than six feet high, a regular
+specimen of a Tipperary chicken. He had
+been entertaining us with characteristic hospitality;
+and we were smoking our pipes
+round the fire, when the hut-keeper rushed in
+without his hat, crying—</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Tom! Tom! the blacks are coming
+down on us, all armed, as hard as they can
+run. Shut the door! for Heaven’s sake shut
+the door!” Tom banged it to, and put his
+shoulder against it, while the keeper was
+pulling up the bar, and Carden and I were
+getting the lock-cases off our fire-arms. Unfortunately
+the door was made roughly of
+green wood, and had shrunk, leaving gaps
+between the slabs.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>In the mean time about thirty blacks hurled
+a volley of spears that made the walls ring again;
+and then advancing boldly up, one of them
+thrust a double-jagged spear through the
+door, slap into Tom’s throat. My back was
+turned towards him, being busy putting a
+fresh cap on my carbine. I heard his cry,
+and, turning, saw him fall into the arms of
+the hut-keeper. I thrust the barrel of my
+piece through a hole against a black devil,
+and fired at the same moment that my
+man did. The two dropped; the rest retreated,
+but turned back, and caught up their
+dead friends. Carden flung open the door
+again, and gave them the contents of his other
+barrel. My black put the hut-keeper’s musket
+into my hand; I gave them a charge of buckshot.
+Three more fell, and the rest, dropping
+their friends, disappeared across the river.
+All this was the work of a moment. We then
+turned our attention to the stock-keeper. The
+spear had entered at the chin, and come out
+on the other side three or four inches. There
+was not a great flow of blood, but he was
+evidently bleeding inwardly. He was perfectly
+collected, and said he was quite sure he
+should die.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>We cut the end of the spear short off, but
+did not dare to take it out. The hut-keeper
+got on a horse, leading another, and rode for
+a doctor who lived one hundred and fifty
+miles off; he never stopped except to give
+the horses a feed two or three times in the
+whole distance, but when he reached his
+journey’s end, the doctor was out. In the
+mean time poor Tom made his will, disposing
+of a few head of cattle, mare and foal, and
+also signed a sort of dying testament to the
+effect that he had never wronged any of the
+blacks in any way. The weather was very
+hot, mortification came on, and he died in
+agony two days after receiving his wound.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The outrage was reported to the Commissioner,
+but no notice was taken of it although
+we were paying a tax for Border Police at
+the time.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Not many years have elapsed since we
+fought for our lives—since I read the burial
+service over the poor murdered Stockman.
+A handsome verandah’d villa now stands in
+the place of the slab hut; yellow corn waves
+over the Irishman’s grave, and while cattle
+and sheep abound, as well white men, women,
+and children, there is not a wild black within
+two hundred miles.</p>
+
+<div class='chapter'>
+ <h2 class='c003'>THE BIRTH OF MORNING.</h2>
+</div>
+
+<div class='lg-container-b c008'>
+ <div class='linegroup'>
+ <div class='group'>
+ <div class='line in2'>Pure, calm, diffused, the twilight of the morn</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Is in the glen, among the dewy leaves.</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Its gentle radiance, more heavenly-born</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Than the half-loving sunbeam, never grieves</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>A nook, unvisited. This Earth receives</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>The light which makes no shade, as the caress</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Of God on his creation, and upheaves</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Her soft face, innocent with peace, to bless,</div>
+ <div class='line'>Babe-like, his watchful eye with waking tenderness.</div>
+ </div>
+ <div class='group'>
+ <div class='line in2'>A gate admits us to the Hill we seek;</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Through woods a track upon the turf we find;</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>The trees are dripping dew, their tall stems creak</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>And rub together when the morning wind</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Lightly caresses them. We pause to mind</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>The note of one awakened bird, whose cry,</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Quaint and repeated, is not like its kind.</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Our ears are ignorant. Now up the high</div>
+ <div class='line'>And mossy slope we climb, beneath an open sky.</div>
+ </div>
+ <div class='group'>
+ <div class='line in2'>We reach the summit. Earth is in a dream</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Of misty seas, and islands strangely born—</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>The unreal, from reality. The stream</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Of wraith-like sights which, ere he can be torn</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>From peaceful sleep, delights the travel-worn</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>At slumber’s painted gate, is not more wild</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Than the imagining of Earth when Morn</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Bids her awaken. So a dreaming child</div>
+ <div class='line'>Looks through white angel wings, and sees all undefiled.</div>
+ </div>
+ <div class='group'>
+ <div class='line in2'>The blessed dream-land fancy of the young,</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>More truthful than the reasoning of age,</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Is like this vision of the morning, sprung</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Of earth and air. These lines upon the page</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Of Nature have life in them. They assuage</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>The fevers of the world, they are the dew</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Of calm,—and God is calm. How mortals wage</div>
+ <div class='line in2'>Their wars of weakness Light reveals to view;</div>
+ <div class='line'>Reason fights through the false, but Fancy feels the true.</div>
+ </div>
+ </div>
+</div>
+
+<div class='chapter'>
+ <span class='pageno' id='Page_421'>421</span>
+ <h2 class='c003'>AN EXCELLENT OPPORTUNITY.</h2>
+</div>
+
+<p class='c004'>In one of the dirtiest and most gloomy
+streets leading to the Rue Saint Denis, in Paris,
+there stands a tall and ancient house, the
+lower portion of which is a large mercer’s
+shop. This establishment is held to be one of
+the very best in the neighbourhood, and has
+for many years belonged to an individual on
+whom we will bestow the name of Ramin.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>About ten years ago, Monsieur Ramin was
+a jovial red-faced man of forty, who joked his
+customers into purchasing his goods, flattered
+the pretty <i>grisettes</i> outrageously, and now and
+then gave them a Sunday treat at the barrier,
+as the cheapest way of securing their custom.
+Some people thought him a careless, good-natured
+fellow, and wondered how, with
+his off-hand ways, he contrived to make
+money so fast, but those who knew him well
+saw that he was one of those who “never
+lost an opportunity.” Others declared that
+Monsieur Ramin’s own definition of his
+character was, that he was a “<i>bon enfant</i>,”
+and that “it was all luck.” He shrugged
+his shoulders and laughed when people hinted
+at his deep scheming in making, and his
+skill in taking advantage of Excellent Opportunities.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>He was sitting in his gloomy parlour one
+fine morning in Spring, breakfasting from a
+dark liquid honoured with the name of onion
+soup, glancing at the newspaper, and keeping
+a vigilant look on the shop through the open
+door, when his old servant Catherine suddenly
+observed:</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I suppose you know Monsieur Bonelle has
+come to live in the vacant apartment on the
+fourth floor?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“What!” exclaimed Monsieur Ramin in
+a loud key.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Catherine repeated her statement, to which
+her master listened in total silence.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Well!” he said, at length, in his most
+careless tones; “what about the old fellow?”
+and he once more resumed his triple occupation
+of reading, eating, and watching.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Why,” continued Catherine, “they say
+he is nearly dying, and that his housekeeper,
+Marguerite, vowed he could never get up-stairs
+alive. It took two men to carry him
+up; and when he was at length quiet in bed,
+Marguerite went down to the porter’s lodge
+and sobbed there a whole hour, saying, Her
+poor master, had the gout, the rheumatics,
+and a bad asthma; that though he had been
+got up-stairs, he would never come down
+again alive; that if she could only get him to
+confess his sins and make his will, she would
+not mind it so much; but that when she
+spoke of the lawyer or the priest, he blasphemed
+at her like a heathen, and declared
+he would live to bury her and every body
+else.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Ramin heard Catherine with
+great attention, forgot to finish his soup, and
+remained for five minutes in profound rumination,
+without so much as perceiving two
+customers who had entered the shop and were
+waiting to be served. When aroused, he was
+heard to exclaim:</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“What an excellent opportunity!”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Bonelle had been Ramin’s predecessor.
+The succession of the latter to
+the shop was a mystery. No one ever
+knew how it was that this young and poor
+assistant managed to replace his patron.
+Some said that he had detected Monsieur
+Bonelle in frauds which he threatened to
+expose, unless the business were given up
+to him as the price of his silence; others
+averred that, having drawn a prize in the
+lottery, he had resolved to set up a fierce
+opposition over the way, and that Monsieur
+Bonelle, having obtained a hint of his
+intentions, had thought it most prudent to
+accept the trifling sum his clerk offered, and
+avoid a ruinous competition. Some charitable
+souls—moved no doubt by Monsieur Bonelle’s
+misfortune—endeavoured to console and pump
+him; but all they could get from him was the
+bitter exclamation, “To think I should have
+been duped by <i>him</i>!” For Ramin had the
+art, though then a mere youth, to pass himself
+off on his master as an innocent provincial lad.
+Those who sought an explanation from the
+new mercer, were still more unsuccessful.
+“My good old master,” he said in his jovial
+way, “felt in need of repose, and so I
+obligingly relieved him of all business and
+botheration.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Years passed away; Ramin prospered, and
+neither thought nor heard of his “good old
+master.” The house, of which he tenanted
+the lower portion, was offered for sale: he
+had long coveted it, and had almost concluded
+an agreement with the actual owner, when
+Monsieur Bonelle unexpectedly stepped in at
+the eleventh hour, and by offering a trifle
+more secured the bargain. The rage and
+mortification of Monsieur Ramin were extreme.
+He could not understand how Bonelle,
+whom he had thought ruined, had scraped up
+so large a sum; his lease was out, and he
+now felt himself at the mercy of the man he
+had so much injured. But either Monsieur
+Bonelle was free from vindictive feelings, or
+those feelings did not blind him to the expediency
+of keeping a good tenant; for though
+he raised the rent, until Monsieur Ramin
+groaned inwardly, he did not refuse to renew
+the lease. They had met at that period; but
+never since.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Well, Catherine,” observed Monsieur
+Ramin to his old servant, on the following
+morning, “How is that good Monsieur Bonelle
+getting on?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I dare say you feel very uneasy about
+him,” she replied with a sneer.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Ramin looked up and frowned.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Catherine,” said he, dryly, “you will have
+the goodness, in the first place, not to make
+impertinent remarks; in the second place,
+you will oblige me by going up-stairs to
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_422'>422</span>inquire after the health of Monsieur Bonelle,
+and say that I sent you.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Catherine grumbled, and obeyed. Her
+master was in the shop, when she returned in
+a few minutes, and delivered with evident
+satisfaction the following gracious message:</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Monsieur Bonelle desires his compliments
+to you, and declines to state how he is; he
+will also thank you to attend to your own
+shop, and not to trouble yourself about his
+health.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“How does he look?” asked Monsieur
+Ramin with perfect composure.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I caught a glimpse of him, and he appears
+to me to be rapidly preparing for the good
+offices of the undertaker.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Ramin smiled, rubbed his hands,
+and joked merrily with a dark-eyed grisette,
+who was cheapening some ribbon for her cap.
+That girl made an excellent bargain that day.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Towards dusk the mercer left the shop to
+the care of his attendant, and softly stole up
+to the fourth story. In answer to his gentle
+ring, a little old woman opened the door, and,
+giving him a rapid look, said briefly,</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Monsieur is inexorable; he won’t see any
+doctor whatever.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>She was going to shut the door in his face,
+when Ramin quickly interposed, under his
+breath, with “<i>I</i> am not a doctor.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>She looked at him from head to foot.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Are you a lawyer?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Nothing of the sort, my good lady.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Well then, are you a priest?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I may almost say, quite the reverse.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Indeed you must go away, Master sees no
+one.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Once more she would have shut the door;
+but Ramin prevented her.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“My good lady,” said he in his most insinuating
+tones, “it is true I am neither a
+lawyer, a doctor, nor a priest. I am an old
+friend, a very old friend of your excellent
+master; I have come to see good Monsieur
+Bonelle in his present affliction.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Marguerite did not answer, but allowed
+him to enter, and closed the door behind him.
+He was going to pass from the narrow and
+gloomy ante-chamber into an inner room—whence
+now proceeded a sound of loud coughing—when
+the old woman laid her hand on
+his arm, and raising herself on tiptoe, to
+reach his ear, whispered:</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“For Heaven’s sake, Sir, since you are his
+friend, do talk to him; do tell him to make
+his will, and hint something about a soul to
+be saved, and all that sort of thing: do, Sir!”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Ramin nodded and winked in a
+way that said “I will.” He proved however
+his prudence by not speaking aloud; for a
+voice from within sharply exclaimed,</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Marguerite, you are talking to some one.
+Marguerite, I will see neither doctor nor
+lawyer; and if any meddling priest dare—”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“It is only an old friend, Sir;” interrupted
+Marguerite, opening the inner door.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Her master, on looking up, perceived the
+red face of Monsieur Ramin peeping over
+the old woman’s shoulder, and irefully cried
+out,</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“How dare you bring that fellow here?
+And you, Sir, how dare you come?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“My good old friend, there are feelings,”
+said Ramin, spreading his fingers over the left
+pocket of his waistcoat,—“there are feelings,”
+he repeated, “that cannot be subdued. One
+such feeling brought me here. The fact is,
+I am a good-natured easy fellow, and I never
+bear malice. I never forget an old friend,
+but love to forget old differences when I
+find one party in affliction.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>He drew a chair forward as he spoke, and
+composedly seated himself opposite to his late
+master.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Bonelle was a thin old man
+with a pale sharp face and keen features.
+At first he eyed his visitor from the depths
+of his vast arm-chair; but, as if not satisfied
+with this distant view, he bent forward, and
+laying both hands on his thin knees, he looked
+up into Ramin’s face with a fixed and piercing
+gaze. He had not, however, the power of disconcerting
+his guest.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“What did you come here for?” he at
+length asked.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Merely to have the extreme satisfaction
+of seeing how you are, my good old friend.
+Nothing more.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Well, look at me—and then go.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Nothing could be so discouraging: but this
+was an Excellent Opportunity, and when Monsieur
+Ramin <i>had</i> an excellent opportunity in
+view, his pertinacity was invincible. Being
+now resolved to stay, it was not in Monsieur
+Bonelle’s power to banish him. At the same
+time, he had tact enough to render his presence
+agreeable. He knew that his coarse
+and boisterous wit had often delighted Monsieur
+Bonelle of old, and he now exerted
+himself so successfully as to betray the old
+man two or three times into hearty laughter.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Ramin,” said he, at length, laying his thin
+hand on the arm of his guest, and peering
+with his keen glance into the mercer’s purple
+face, “you are a funny fellow, but I know
+you; you cannot make me believe you have
+called just to see how I am, and to amuse
+me. Come, be candid for once; what do you
+want?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Ramin threw himself back in his chair, and
+laughed blandly, as much as to say, “<i>Can</i> you
+suspect me?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I have no shop now out of which you can
+wheedle me,” continued the old man; “and
+surely you are not such a fool as to come to
+me for money.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Money?” repeated the draper, as if his
+host had mentioned something he never
+dreamt of. “Oh, no!”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Ramin saw it would not do to broach the
+subject he had really come about, too abruptly,
+now that suspicion seemed so wide awake—<i>the</i>
+opportunity had not arrived.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“There is something up, Ramin, I know;
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_423'>423</span>I see it in the twinkle of your eye: but you
+can’t deceive me again.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Deceive <i>you</i>?” said the jolly schemer,
+shaking his head reverentially. “Deceive a
+man of your penetration and depth? Impossible!
+The bare supposition is flattery. My
+dear friend,” he continued, soothingly, “I did
+not dream of such a thing. The fact is, Bonelle,
+though they call me a jovial, careless, rattling
+dog, I have a conscience; and, somehow, I have
+never felt quite easy about the way in which I
+became your successor down-stairs. It <i>was</i>
+rather sharp practice, I admit.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Bonelle seemed to relent.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Now for it,” said the Opportunity-hunter
+to himself.—“By-the-by,” (speaking aloud,)
+“this house must be a great trouble to you in
+your present weak state? Two of your lodgers
+have lately gone away without paying—a
+great nuisance, especially to an invalid.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I tell you I’m as sound as a colt.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“At all events, the whole concern must be
+a great bother to you. If I were you, I would
+sell the house.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“And if I were <i>you</i>,” returned the landlord,
+dryly, “I would buy it——”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Precisely,” interrupted the tenant, eagerly.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“That is, if you could get it. Phoo! I
+knew you were after something. Will you
+give eighty thousand francs for it?” abruptly
+asked Monsieur Bonelle.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Eighty thousand francs!” echoed Ramin.
+“Do you take me for Louis Philippe or the
+Bank of France?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Then, we’ll say no more about it—are
+you not afraid of leaving your shop so long?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Ramin returned to the charge, heedless of
+the hint to depart. “The fact is, my good
+old friend, ready money is not my strong
+point just now. But if you wish very much
+to be relieved of the concern, what say you
+to a life annuity? I could manage that.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Bonelle gave a short, dry, churchyard
+cough, and looked as if his life were not
+worth an hour’s purchase. “You think yourself
+immensely clever, I dare say,” he said.
+“They have persuaded you that I am dying.
+Stuff! I shall bury you yet.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The mercer glanced at the thin fragile
+frame, and exclaimed to himself, “Deluded
+old gentleman!” “My dear Bonelle,” he
+continued, aloud, “I know well the strength
+of your admirable constitution; but allow
+me to observe that you neglect yourself
+too much. Now, suppose a good sensible
+doctor——.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Will you pay him?” interrogated Bonelle
+sharply.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Most willingly,” replied Ramin, with an
+eagerness that made the old man smile. “As
+to the annuity, since the subject annoys you,
+we will talk of it some other time.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“After you have heard the doctor’s report,”
+sneered Bonelle.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The mercer gave him a stealthy glance,
+which the old man’s keen look immediately
+detected. Neither could repress a smile:
+these good souls understood one another perfectly,
+and Ramin saw that this was not the
+Excellent Opportunity he desired, and departed.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The next day Ramin sent a neighbouring
+medical man, and heard it was his opinion
+that if Bonelle held on for three months longer,
+it would be a miracle. Delightful news!</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Several days elapsed, and although very
+anxious, Ramin assumed a careless air, and did
+not call upon his landlord, or take any notice of
+him. At the end of the week old Marguerite
+entered the shop to make a trifling purchase.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“And how are we getting on up-stairs?”
+negligently asked Monsieur Ramin.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Worse and worse, my good Sir,” she
+sighed. “We have rheumatic pains, which
+make us often use expressions the reverse of
+Christian-like, and yet nothing can induce us
+to see either the lawyer or the priest; the
+gout is getting nearer to our stomach every
+day, and still we go on talking about the
+strength of our constitution. Oh, Sir, if you
+have any influence with us, do, pray do, tell
+us how wicked it is to die without making
+one’s will or confessing one’s sins.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I shall go up this very evening,” ambiguously
+replied Monsieur Ramin.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>He kept his promise, and found Monsieur
+Bonelle in bed, groaning with pain, and in
+the worst of tempers.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“What poisoning doctor did you send?” he
+asked, with an ireful glance; “I want no
+doctor, I am not ill; I will not follow his
+prescription; he forbade me to eat; I <i>will</i>
+eat.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“He is a very clever man,” said the visitor.
+“He told me that never in the whole course
+of his experience has he met with what he
+called so much ‘resisting power’ as exists in
+your frame. He asked me if you were not of
+a long-lived race.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“That is as people may judge,” replied
+Monsieur Bonelle. “All I can say is, that
+my grandfather died at ninety, and my father
+at eighty-six.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“The doctor owned that you had a wonderfully
+strong constitution.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Who said I hadn’t?” exclaimed the invalid
+feebly.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“You may rely on it, you would preserve
+your health better if you had not the trouble
+of these vexatious lodgers. Have you thought
+about the life annuity?” said Ramin as carelessly
+as he could, considering how near the
+matter was to his hopes and wishes.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Why, I have scruples,” returned Bonelle,
+coughing. “I do not wish to take you in.
+My longevity would be the ruin of you.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“To meet that difficulty,” quickly replied
+the mercer, “we can reduce the interest.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“But I must have high interest,” placidly
+returned Monsieur Bonelle.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Ramin, on hearing this, burst into a loud
+fit of laughter, called Monsieur Bonelle a sly
+old fox, gave him a poke in the ribs, which
+made the old man cough for five minutes, and
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_424'>424</span>then proposed that they should talk it over
+some other day. The mercer left Monsieur
+Bonelle in the act of protesting that he felt as
+strong as a man of forty.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Ramin felt in no hurry to conclude
+the proposed agreement. “The later
+one begins to pay, the better,” he said, as he
+descended the stairs.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Days passed on, and the negotiation made
+no way. It struck the observant tradesman
+that all was not right. Old Marguerite
+several times refused to admit him, declaring
+her master was asleep: there was something
+mysterious and forbidding in her manner that
+seemed to Monsieur Ramin very ominous.
+At length a sudden thought occurred to
+him: the housekeeper—wishing to become her
+master’s heir—had heard his scheme and opposed
+it. On the very day that he arrived at
+this conclusion, he met a lawyer, with whom
+he had formerly had some transactions, coming
+down the staircase. The sight sent a chill
+through the mercer’s commercial heart, and a
+presentiment—one of those presentiments that
+seldom deceive—told him it was too late. He
+had, however, the fortitude to abstain from
+visiting Monsieur Bonelle until evening came;
+when he went up, resolved to see him in spite
+of all Marguerite might urge. The door was
+half-open, and the old housekeeper stood
+talking on the landing to a middle-aged man
+in a dark cassock.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“It is all over! The old witch has got the
+priests at him,” thought Ramin, inwardly
+groaning at his own folly in allowing himself
+to be forestalled.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“You cannot see Monsieur to-night,”
+sharply said Marguerite, as he attempted to
+pass her.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Alas! is my excellent friend so very ill?”
+asked Ramin, in a mournful tone.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Sir,” eagerly said the clergyman, catching
+him by the button of his coat, “if you are
+indeed the friend of that unhappy man, do
+seek to bring him into a more suitable frame
+of mind. I have seen many dying men, but
+never so much obstinacy, never such infatuated
+belief in the duration of life.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Then you think he really <i>is</i> dying?”
+asked Ramin; and, in spite of the melancholy
+accent he endeavoured to assume, there was
+something so peculiar in his tone, that the
+priest looked at him very fixedly as he slowly
+replied,</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Yes, Sir, I think he is.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Ah!” was all Monsieur Ramin said; and
+as the clergyman had now relaxed his hold
+of the button, Ramin passed in spite of the
+remonstrances of Marguerite, who rushed
+after the priest. He found Monsieur Bonelle
+still in bed and in a towering rage.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Oh! Ramin, my friend,” he groaned,
+“never take a housekeeper, and never let her
+know you have any property. They are
+harpies, Ramin,—harpies! such a day as I
+have had; first, the lawyer, who comes to
+write down ‘my last testamentary dispositions,’
+as he calls them; then the priest,
+who gently hints that I am a dying man. Oh,
+what a day!”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“And <i>did</i> you make your will, my excellent
+friend?” softly asked Monsieur Ramin, with
+a keen look.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Make my will?” indignantly exclaimed
+the old man; “make my will? what do
+you mean, Sir? do you mean to say I am
+dying?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Heaven forbid!” piously ejaculated Ramin.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Then why do you ask me if I have been
+making my will?” angrily resumed the old
+man. He then began to be extremely abusive.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>When money was in the way, Monsieur
+Ramin, though otherwise of a violent temper,
+had the meekness of a lamb. He bore the
+treatment of his host with the meekest
+patience, and having first locked the door
+so as to make sure that Marguerite would not
+interrupt them, he watched Monsieur Bonelle
+attentively, and satisfied himself that the
+Excellent Opportunity he had been ardently
+longing for had arrived. “He is going fast,”
+he thought; “and unless I settle the agreement
+to-night, and get it drawn up and signed
+to-morrow, it will be too late.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“My dear friend,” he at length said aloud,
+on perceiving that the old gentleman had
+fairly exhausted himself and was lying panting
+on his back, “you are indeed a lamentable
+instance of the lengths to which the greedy
+lust of lucre will carry our poor human
+nature. It is really distressing to see Marguerite,
+a faithful, attached servant, suddenly
+converted into a tormenting harpy by the
+prospect of a legacy! Lawyers and priests
+flock around you like birds of prey, drawn
+hither by the scent of gold! Oh, the
+miseries of having delicate health combined
+with a sound constitution and large property!”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Ramin,” groaned the old man, looking inquiringly
+into his visitor’s face, “you are again
+going to talk to me about that annuity—I
+know you are!”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“My excellent friend, it is merely to deliver
+you from a painful position.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“I am sure, Ramin, you think in your soul
+I am dying,” whimpered Monsieur Bonelle.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Absurd, my dear Sir. Dying? I will prove
+to you that you have never been in better
+health. In the first place you feel no pain.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Excepting from rheumatism,” groaned
+Monsieur Bonelle.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Rheumatism! who ever died of rheumatism?
+and if that be all——”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“No, it is not all,” interrupted the old man
+with great irritability; “what would you say
+to the gout getting higher and higher up
+every day?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“The gout is rather disagreeable, but if
+there is nothing else——”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Yes, there is something else,” sharply
+said Monsieur Bonelle. “There is an asthma
+that will scarcely let me breathe, and a racking
+pain in my head that does not allow me a
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_425'>425</span>moment’s ease. But if you think I am dying,
+Ramin, you are quite mistaken.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“No doubt, my dear friend, no doubt; but
+in the meanwhile, suppose we talk of this
+annuity. Shall we say one thousand francs a
+year.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“What?” asked Bonelle, looking at him
+very fixedly.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“My dear friend, I mistook; I meant two
+thousand francs per annum,” hurriedly rejoined
+Ramin.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Bonelle closed his eyes, and appeared
+to fall into a gentle slumber. The
+mercer coughed; the sick man never moved.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Monsieur Bonelle.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>No reply.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“My excellent friend.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Utter silence.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Are you asleep?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>A long pause.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Well, then, what do you say to three
+thousand?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Bonelle opened his eyes.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Ramin,” said he, sententiously, “you are
+a fool; the house brings me in four thousand
+as it is.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>This was quite false, and the mercer knew
+it; but he had his own reasons for wishing
+to seem to believe it true.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Good Heavens!” said he, with an air of
+great innocence, “who could have thought it,
+and the lodgers constantly running away.
+Four thousand? Well, then, you shall have
+four thousand.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Bonelle shut his eyes once more,
+and murmured “The mere rental—nonsense!”
+He then folded his hands on his breast, and
+appeared to compose himself to sleep.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Oh, what a sharp man of business he is!”
+Ramin said, admiringly: but for once omnipotent
+flattery failed in its effect: “So acute!”
+continued he, with a stealthy glance at the
+old man, who remained perfectly unmoved.
+“I see you will insist upon making it the other
+five hundred francs.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Monsieur Ramin said this as if five thousand
+five hundred francs had already been mentioned,
+and was the very summit of Monsieur
+Bonelle’s ambition. But the ruse failed in
+its effect; the sick man never so much as
+stirred.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“But, my dear friend,” urged Monsieur
+Ramin in a tone of feeling remonstrance,
+“there is such a thing as being too sharp, too
+acute. How can you expect that I shall give
+you more when your constitution is so good,
+and you are to be such a long liver?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Yes, but I may be carried off one of those
+days,” quietly observed the old man, evidently
+wishing to turn the chance of his own death
+to account.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Indeed, and I hope so,” muttered the
+mercer, who was getting very ill-tempered.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“You see,” soothingly continued Bonelle,
+“you are so good a man of business, Ramin,
+that you will double the actual value of the
+house in no time. I am a quiet, easy person,
+indifferent to money; otherwise this house
+would now bring me in eight thousand at the
+very least.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Eight thousand!” indignantly exclaimed
+the mercer. “Monsieur Bonelle, you have
+no conscience. Come now, my dear friend, do
+be reasonable. Six thousand francs a year (I
+don’t mind saying six) is really a very handsome
+income for a man of your quiet habits.
+Come, be reasonable.” But Monsieur Bonelle
+turned a deaf ear to reason, and closed his
+eyes once more. What between opening
+and shutting them for the next quarter of an
+hour, he at length induced Monsieur Ramin
+to offer him seven thousand francs.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Very well, Ramin, agreed,” he quietly
+said; “you have made an unconscionable
+bargain.” To this succeeded a violent fit of
+coughing.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>As Ramin unlocked the door to leave, he
+found old Marguerite, who had been listening
+all the time, ready to assail him with a torrent
+of whispered abuse for duping her “poor
+dear innocent old master into such a bargain.”
+The mercer bore it all very patiently; he
+could make allowances for her excited feelings,
+and only rubbed his hands and bade her a
+jovial good evening.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The agreement was signed on the following
+day, to the indignation of old Marguerite, and
+the mutual satisfaction of the parties concerned.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Every one admired the luck and shrewdness
+of Ramin, for the old man every day
+was reported worse; and it was clear to all
+that the first quarter of the annuity would
+never be paid. Marguerite, in her wrath,
+told the story as a grievance to every one:
+people listened, shook their heads, and pronounced
+Monsieur Ramin to be a deuced
+clever fellow.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>A month elapsed. As Ramin was coming
+down one morning from the attics, where he
+had been giving notice to a poor widow who
+had failed in paying her rent, he heard a light
+step on the stairs. Presently a sprightly gentleman,
+in buoyant health and spirits, wearing
+the form of Monsieur Bonelle, appeared.
+Ramin stood aghast.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Well, Ramin,” gaily said the old man,
+“how are you getting on? Have you been
+tormenting the poor widow up-stairs? Why,
+man, we must live and let live!”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Monsieur Bonelle,” said the mercer, in a
+hollow tone; “may I ask where are your
+rheumatics?”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“Gone, my dear friend,—gone.”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“And the gout that was creeping higher
+and higher every day,” exclaimed Monsieur
+Ramin, in a voice of anguish.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“It went lower and lower, till it disappeared
+altogether,” composedly replied Bonelle.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“And your asthma——”</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>“The asthma remains, but asthmatic people
+are proverbially long-lived. It is, I have been
+told, the only complaint that Methuselah was
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_426'>426</span>troubled with.” With this Bonelle opened
+his door, shut it, and disappeared.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Ramin was transfixed on the stairs;
+petrified with intense disappointment, and a
+powerful sense of having been duped. When
+he was discovered, he stared vacantly, and
+raved about an Excellent Opportunity of
+taking his revenge.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The wonderful cure was the talk of the
+neighbourhood, whenever Monsieur Bonelle
+appeared in the streets, jauntily flourishing
+his cane. In the first frenzy of his despair,
+Ramin refused to pay; he accused every
+one of having been in a plot to deceive
+him; he turned off Catherine and expelled
+his porter; he publicly accused the lawyer
+and priest of conspiracy; brought an action
+against the doctor, and lost it. He had
+another brought against him for violently
+assaulting Marguerite in which he was
+cast in heavy damages. Monsieur Bonelle
+did not trouble himself with useless remonstrances,
+but, when his annuity was refused,
+employed such good legal arguments, as the
+exasperated mercer could not possibly resist.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>Ten years have elapsed, and MM. Ramin
+and Bonelle still live on. For a house which
+would have been dear at fifty thousand francs,
+the draper has already handed over seventy
+thousand.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The once red-faced, jovial Ramin is now a
+pale haggard man, of sour temper and aspect.
+To add to his anguish, he sees the old man thrive
+on that money which it breaks his heart to
+give. Old Marguerite takes a malicious
+pleasure in giving him an exact account of
+their good cheer, and in asking him if he does
+not think Monsieur looks better and better every
+day. Of one part of this torment Ramin might
+get rid, by giving his old master notice to quit,
+and no longer having him in his house. But
+this he cannot do; he has a secret fear that
+Bonelle would take some Excellent Opportunity
+of dying without his knowledge, and
+giving some other person an Excellent Opportunity
+of personating him, and receiving the
+money in his stead.</p>
+
+<p class='c005'>The last accounts of the victim of Excellent
+Opportunities represent him as being
+gradually worn down with disappointment.
+There seems every probability of his being the
+first to leave the world; for Bonelle is heartier
+than ever.</p>
+
+<div class='chapter'>
+ <h2 class='c003'>REVIEW OF A POPULAR PUBLICATION.<br> <span class='c007'>IN THE SEARCHING STYLE.</span></h2>
+</div>
+
+<p class='c009'><span class='sc'>The Bank Note.</span> <i>Oblong Octavo.</i> London, 1850.
+<i>The Governor and Company of the Bank of
+England. Price, from Five to One Thousand
+Pounds.</i></p>
+
+<p class='c010'>The object of this popular but expensive
+pocket companion, is not wholly dissimilar from
+that of its clever and cheaper contemporary
+“Notes and Queries.” As the latter is a
+“medium of intercommunication for literary
+men,” so the former is a medium of intercommunication
+for commercial men; and
+surely there is no work with which so many
+queries are constantly connected as the Bank
+Note. Nothing in existence is so assiduously
+inquired for; nothing in nature so perseveringly
+sought.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>This is not to be wondered at; for in whatever
+light we view it, to whatever test we
+bring it, whether we read it backwards or
+forwards, from left to right, or from right to
+left; or whether we make it a transparency
+to prove its substantial genuineness and
+worth, who can deny that the Bank Note is a
+most valuable work?—a publication, in short,
+without which no gentleman’s pocket can be
+complete?</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>Few can rise from a critical examination of
+the literary contents of this narrow sheet,
+without being forcibly struck with the power,
+combined with the exquisite fineness of the
+writing. It strikes conviction at once. It
+dispels all doubts, and relieves all objections.
+There is a pithy terseness in the construction
+of the sentences; a downright, direct, straightforward,
+coming to the point, which would
+be wisely imitated in much of the contemporaneous
+literature that constantly obtains
+currency (though not as much). Here we have
+no circumlocution, no discursive pedantry, no
+smell of the lamp; the figures, though wholly
+derived from the East (being Arabic numerals),
+are distinct and full of purpose; and if
+the writing abounds in flourishes, which it
+does, these are not rhetorical, but boldly
+graphic: struck with a nervous decision of
+style, which, instead of obscuring the text and
+meaning, convinces the reader that he who
+traced them when promising to pay the sum
+of five, ten, twenty, thirty, forty, fifty, one
+hundred, or a thousand pounds, means
+honestly and instantly to keep his word:
+that he <i>will</i> pay it to bearer on demand,
+without one moment’s hesitation.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>Strictly adapted for utility, yet the dulcet
+is not wholly overlooked; for, besides figures
+and flourishes, the graces of art are shed over
+this much-prized publication. The figure of
+Britannia is no slavish reproduction of any
+particular school whatever. She sits upon
+her scroll of state utterly inimitable and alone.
+She is hung up in one corner of the page, the
+sole representative of the P. R. F. P., or pre-reissue-of-the-fourpenny-piece,
+school. Neither,
+if judged by the golden rule of our greatest
+bard, is the work wholly deficient in another
+charm. As we have just explained, its words
+are few: brevity is the soul of wit. And we
+fearlessly put it to the keenest appreciator
+of good things, whether a Bank Note (say for
+a hundred) is not the best joke conceivable—except,
+indeed, a Bank Note for a thousand.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>A critical analysis of a work of this importance
+cannot be complete without going
+deeply into the subject. Reviewing is, alas,
+too often mere surface-work; for seldom do
+we find the critic going below the superficies,
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_427'>427</span>or extending his scrutiny beyond the letter-press.
+We shall, however, set a bright example
+of profundity, and having discharged our duty
+to the face of the Bank Note, shall proceed
+to penetrate below it: having analysed the
+print, we shall now speak of the paper.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>The late Mr. Cobbett, to express his idea of
+the intrinsic worthlessness of these sheets, in
+comparison with the prices at which they pass
+current, was wont to designate Bank Notes as
+“Rags.” It may, indeed, be said of them
+that, “Rags they were, and to tinder they
+return;” for they are born of shreds of linen,
+and, ten years after death, are converted in
+bonfires into the finest of known tinder. It
+may be considered a curious fact by those
+who wear shirts, and a painful, because hopeless
+one, by those who make them, that the
+refuse or cuttings of linen forms, with a slight
+admixture of cotton, the pabulum or pulp of
+Bank Note Paper. Machinery has made no
+inroads on this branch of paper-making. The
+pulp is kept so well mixed in a large vat,
+that the fibrous material presents the appearance
+of a huge cauldron of milk. Into this
+the paper-maker dips his mould, which is a
+fine wire sieve, having round its edge, a
+slight mahogany frame, called the “Deckel,”
+which confines the pulp to the dimensions
+of the mould. This dip is quite a feat of
+dexterity, for on it depends the thickness
+and evenness of the sheet of paper. The
+water-mark, or, more properly, the wire-mark,
+is obtained by twisting wires to the
+desired form or design, and stitching them
+on the face of the mould; therefore the design
+is above the level face of the mould, by the
+thickness of the wires it is composed of. Hence,
+the pulp in settling down on the mould, must
+of necessity be thinner on the wire design
+than on other parts of the sheet. When the
+water has run off through the sieve-like
+face of the mould, the new-born sheet of paper
+is transferred to a blanket; this operation is
+called “couching,” and is effected by pressing
+the mould gently but firmly on the blanket,
+when the spongy sheet clings to the cloth.
+Sizing is a subsequent process, and, when
+dry, the water-mark is plainly discernible,
+being, of course, transparent where the substance
+is thinnest. The paper is then made
+up into reams of five hundred sheets each,
+ready for press. The water-mark in the
+notes of the Bank of England is secured
+to that Establishment by a special Act of
+Parliament. Indeed, imitation of anything
+whatever connected with a Bank Note is an
+extremely hazardous feat.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>A scrupulous examination of this curious
+piece of paper, implants a thorough conviction
+that it is a very superior article—in
+short, unique. There is nothing like it in the
+world of sheets. Tested by the touch, it
+gives out a crisp, crackling, sharp, sound—a
+note essentially its own—a music which resounds
+from no other quires. To the eye it
+shows a colour belonging neither to blue-wove
+nor yellow-wove, nor to cream-laid, but a
+white, like no other white, either in paper and
+pulp. The rough fringiness of three of its
+edges are called the “deckled” edges, being
+the natural boundary of the pulp when first
+moulded; the fourth is left smooth by the
+knife, which eventually cuts the two notes in
+twain. It is so thin that, when printed, there
+is much difficulty in making erasures; yet
+it is so strong that a “water-leaf” (a leaf before
+the application of size) will support thirty-six
+pounds; and, with the addition of one grain
+of size, half a hundred weight, without tearing;
+yet the quantity of fibre of which it consists,
+is no more than eighteen grains and a half.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>The process of engraving the Bank Note is
+peculiar. Its general design is remarkably
+plain—steel plates are used, and are engraved
+in a manner somewhat analogous to that employed
+in the Mint for the production of the
+coin, except that heavy pressure is used
+instead of a blow. The form of the Note
+is divided into four or five sections, each engraved
+on steel dies which are hardened.
+Steel rollers, or mills, are obtained from these
+dies, and each portion of the Note is impressed
+on a steel plate to be printed from by the
+mills until the whole form is complete.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>By means of a very ingenious machine, the
+engraving on the plates when worn by long
+printing is repaired by the same mills, and
+thus perfect identity of form is permanently
+secured. The merits of this system are due
+to the late Mr. Oldham, and the many improvements
+introduced not only into this, but
+into the printing department, are the work of
+his son and successor, Mr. Thomas Oldham,
+the present chief engraver to the Bank of
+England. The plate—always with a pair of
+notes upon it—is now ready for the press;
+for it contains all the literary part of the
+work, except the date, the number, and the
+cashier’s signature.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>We must now review the manner of
+printing. Before passing through the press,
+all paper must be damped that it may readily
+absorb ink; and Bank Note paper is not exempt
+from this law; but the process by which
+it is complied with is an ingenious exception
+to the ordinary modes. The sheets are put
+into an iron chamber which is exhausted of
+air; water is then admitted, and forces itself
+through every pore at the rate of thirty thousand
+sheets, or double notes, per minute!</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>In a long gallery that looks like a chamber of
+the Inquisition with self-acting racks, stands a
+row of plate-printing presses worked by steam.
+Every time a sheet passes through them they
+emit a soft “click” like a ship’s capstan
+creaking in a whisper. By this sound they
+announce to all whom it may concern that
+they have printed two Bank Notes. They are
+tell-tales, and keep no secrets; for, not content
+with stating the fact aloud, each press moves,
+by means of a chain, an index of numerals at
+the end of the room; so that the chief of the
+department can see at any hour of the day
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_428'>428</span>how many each press has printed. To take an
+impression of a note plate “on the sly,” is
+therefore impossible. By a clever invention
+of Mr. Oldham the impression returns to the
+printer when made, instead of remaining on
+the opposite side of the press, after it has
+passed through the rollers, as of old. The
+plates are heated, for inking, over steam boxes
+instead of charcoal fires.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>When a ream, consisting of five hundred
+sheets or one thousand notes, have been
+printed, they are placed in a tray which is
+inserted in a sort of shelf-trap that shuts up
+with a spring. No after-abstraction can, therefore,
+take place. One such repository is over
+the index appertaining to each press, and at
+the end of the day it can at once be seen
+whether the number of sheets corresponds
+with the numerals of the tell-tale. Any sort
+of mistake can thus be readily detected. The
+average number of “promises to pay” printed
+per diem is thirty thousand.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>As we cannot allow the dot over an <i>i</i>, or the
+cross of a <i>t</i> to escape the focus of our critical
+microscope, we now proceed to apply it to the
+Bank Ink. Like the liquid of Messrs. Day
+and Martin, this inestimable composition, with
+half the usual labour, produces the most
+brilliant jet-black, fully equal to the highest
+Japan varnish, and is warranted to keep in
+any climate. It is made from the charred
+husks of Rhenish grapes after their juice has
+been expressed and bottled for exportation to
+the dinner-tables of half the world. When
+mixed with pure linseed oil, carefully prepared
+by boiling and burning, the vinous
+refuse produces a species of blacks so tenacious
+that they obstinately refuse to be emancipated
+from the paper when once enslaved to it by
+the press. It is so intensely nigritious that,
+compared with it, all other blacks are musty
+browns; and pale beside it. If the word of a
+printer’s devil may be taken, it is many
+degrees darker than the streams of Erebus.
+Can deeper praise be awarded?</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>The note is, when plate-printed, two processes
+distant from negotiable; the first being
+the numbering and dating—and here we must
+point out the grand distinction which exists
+between the publication which we have the
+satisfaction of stating, now lies before us (but
+it is only a “Five”) and ordinary prints. When
+the types for this miscellany, for instance, are
+once set up, every copy struck off from them
+by the press is precisely similar. On the
+contrary, of those emitted from the Bank
+presses <i>no two are alike</i>. They differ either in
+date, in number, or in denomination. This
+difference constitutes a grand system of check,
+extending over every stage of every Bank
+Note’s career—a system which records its
+completion and issue, tracks it through its
+public adventures, recognises it when it returns
+to the Bank, from among hundreds of
+thousands of companions, and finally enables
+the proper officers to pounce upon it, in case
+of inquiry, at any official half hour for ten
+years after it has returned in fulfilment of its
+“promise to pay,” To promise an explanation
+of what must appear so complicated a
+plan, may seem to the reader like a threat of
+prolixity. But he may read on in security;
+the system is as simple as the alphabet.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>Understand then, that the dates of Bank
+Notes are arbitrary, and bear no reference to
+the day of issue. At the beginning of the
+official year (February) the Directors settle
+what dates each of the eleven denominations
+of Bank Notes shall bear during the ensuing
+twelve months, taking care to apportion to
+each sort of note a separate date. The table
+of dates is then handed to the proper officer,
+who prints accordingly. The five-pound Note
+which now rejoices our eyes is, for example,
+dated February the 2nd, 1850; we therefore
+know that there is no genuine note in existence,
+for any other sum, which bears that
+date; and if a note for ten, twenty, fifty,
+hundred, &#38;c., having “2nd Feb., 1850,” upon
+it were to be offered to us or to a Bank Clerk,
+we or he would, without a shadow of further
+evidence, impound it as a forgery.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>Now, as to the numbering:—It is a rule
+that of every date and denomination, one
+hundred thousand Notes—no more and no
+less—shall be completed and issued at one
+time. We know, therefore, that our solitary
+five is one of a hundred thousand other fives,
+each bearing a different number—from 1<a id='r2'></a><a href='#f2' class='c006'><sup>[2]</sup></a> to
+100,000—but all dated 2nd Feb., 1850. The
+numbers are printed on each Note by
+means of a letter-press, the types of which
+change with each pull of the press. For the
+first Note, the press is set at “00001,” and
+when that is printed, the “1,” by the mere act
+of impression, retires to make room for “2,”
+which impresses itself on the next Note, and
+so on up to “100,000.” The system has been
+applied to the stamping of railway tickets.
+The date, being required for the whole series,
+is of course immovable. After this has been
+done, the autograph of a cashier is only
+requisite to render the Note worth the value
+inscribed on it, in gold.</p>
+
+<div class='footnote' id='f2'>
+<p class='c010'><span class='label'><a href='#r2'>2</a>.&#160;&#160;</span>To prevent fraudulent additions of numerals, less than
+five figures are never used. When units, tens, &#38;c., are
+required, they are preceded by cyphers. “One” is therefore
+expressed on a Bank Note thus:—“00001.”</p>
+</div>
+
+<p class='c010'>While the printers are at work, manufacturing
+each series of Notes, the account-book
+makers are getting-up a series of ledgers
+so exactly to correspond, that the books of
+themselves, without the stroke of a pen, are a
+record of the existence of the Note. The book
+in which the birth of our own especial and particular
+“Five” is registered, is legibly inscribed,</p>
+
+<div class='nf-center-c1'>
+<div class='nf-center c011'>
+ <div>“Fives, Feb. 2, 1850.”</div>
+ </div>
+</div>
+
+<p class='c010'>When you open a page, you find it to consist
+of a series of horizontal and perpendicular
+lines, like the pattern of a pair of shepherd’s
+plaid inexpressibles, variegated with columns
+of numerals; these figures running on regularly
+from No. 1, on the top of the first page, to
+No. 100,000 at the bottom of the last. It
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_429'>429</span>must therefore be obvious to the meanest
+capacity that the mere existence of that book,
+with its arbitrary date and series of numbers,
+corresponding to the like series of Notes, is a
+sufficient record of the existence and issue of
+the latter. The return of each Note after its
+public travels, is recorded in the square opposite
+to its number. Each page of the book
+contains two hundred squares and numbers;
+consequently, whatever number a Note may
+bear, the Clerk who has to register its safe
+return from a long round of public circulation,
+knows at once on which page of the book to
+pounce for its own proper and particular
+square. In that he inserts the date of its
+return—not at full length, but in cypher.
+“S” in red ink means 1850, and the months
+are indicated by one of the letters of the word
+<span class='sc'>Ambidextrous</span>, with the date in numerals.
+Our only, and therefore favourite, five is
+numbered 31177. Should it chance to finish
+its travels in the Accountant’s Office on the
+6th of August next, it will be narrowly inspected
+(for fear of forgery) and defaced—a
+Clerk will then turn at once to the book
+lettered “Fives, Feb. 2,” and so exactly will
+he know which page to open, and where the
+square numbered 31177 is situated, that he
+could point to it blindfold. He will write
+in it “6 t,” which means 6th August; that
+being the eighth month in the year, and “t”
+the eighth letter in the chosen word.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>The intermediate history of a Bank Note is
+soon told. Nineteen-twentieths are issued to
+Bankers or known houses of business. If
+Glynn’s, or Smith’s, or any other banking firm,
+require a hundred ten-pound Notes, the Clerk
+who issues them makes a memorandum showing
+the number of the Notes so issued, and the
+name of the party to whom they have been
+handed—an easy process, because Notes being
+new,<a id='r3'></a><a href='#f3' class='c006'><sup>[3]</sup></a> are always given out in regular series,
+and the first and last Note that makes the sum
+required need only be recorded. Most Bankers
+make similar memoranda when notes pass out
+of their hands; and the public, as each Note
+circulates among them, frequently sign the
+name of the last holder. When an unknown
+person presents a Note for gold at the Bank of
+England, he is required to write his name and
+address on it, and if the sum be very large, it
+is not paid without inquiry. By these expedients,
+a stolen, lost, or forged note can often
+be traced from hand to hand up to its advent.</p>
+
+<div class='footnote' id='f3'>
+<p class='c010'><span class='label'><a href='#r3'>3</a>.&#160;&#160;</span>The Bank ceased to re-issue its Notes since 1835.</p>
+</div>
+
+<p class='c010'>The average periods which each denomination
+of London Notes remain in circulation has
+been calculated, and is shown by the following</p>
+
+<table class='table0'>
+ <tr><th class='c012' colspan='3'><span class='sc'>Account of the Number of Days a Bank Note issued in London remains in Circulation</span>:—</th></tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>&#160;</td>
+ <td class='c013'>&#160;</td>
+ <td class='c014'>&#160;</td>
+ </tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>£5</td>
+ <td class='c013'>72·7</td>
+ <td class='c014'>days</td>
+ </tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>10</td>
+ <td class='c013'>77·0</td>
+ <td class='c014'>„</td>
+ </tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>20</td>
+ <td class='c013'>57·4</td>
+ <td class='c014'>„</td>
+ </tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>30</td>
+ <td class='c013'>18·9</td>
+ <td class='c014'>„</td>
+ </tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>40</td>
+ <td class='c013'>13·7</td>
+ <td class='c014'>„</td>
+ </tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>50</td>
+ <td class='c013'>38·8</td>
+ <td class='c014'>„</td>
+ </tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>100</td>
+ <td class='c013'>29·4</td>
+ <td class='c014'>„</td>
+ </tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>200</td>
+ <td class='c013'>12·7</td>
+ <td class='c014'>„</td>
+ </tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>300</td>
+ <td class='c013'>10·6</td>
+ <td class='c014'>„</td>
+ </tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>500</td>
+ <td class='c013'>11·8</td>
+ <td class='c014'>„</td>
+ </tr>
+ <tr>
+ <td class='c013'>1000</td>
+ <td class='c013'>11·1</td>
+ <td class='c014'>„</td>
+ </tr>
+</table>
+
+<p class='c010'>The exceptions to these averages are few,
+and, therefore, remarkable. The time during
+which some Notes remain unpresented are
+reckoned by the century. On the 27th of September,
+1845, a fifty pound Note was presented
+bearing date 20th January, 1743. Another
+for ten pounds, issued on the 19th November,
+1762, was not paid till the 20th April, 1843.
+There is a legend extant, of the eccentric possessor
+of a thousand pound Note, who kept it
+framed and glazed for a series of years, preferring
+to feast his eyes on it, to putting the
+amount it represented out at interest. It
+was converted into gold, however, without
+a day’s loss of time by his heirs, on his demise.
+Stolen and lost Notes are generally long
+absentees. The former usually make their
+appearance soon after some great horse-race,
+or other sporting event, altered or disguised
+so as to deceive Bankers, to whom the Bank
+of England furnishes a list of the numbers
+and dates of stolen Notes. In a Chapter on
+Forgery, which we are preparing, the reader
+will see some singular facts on this point.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>Mr. Francis, in his “History of the Bank
+of England,” tells a curious story about
+a bank post bill, which was detained during
+thirty years from presentation and payment.
+It happened in the year 1740:—“One
+of the Directors, a very rich man, had
+occasion for 30,000<i>l.</i>, which he was to pay as
+the price of an estate be had just bought; to
+facilitate the matter, he carried the sum with
+him to the Bank and obtained for it a Bank
+bill. On his return home, he was suddenly
+called out upon particular business; he threw
+the Note carelessly on the chimney, but when
+he came back a few minutes afterwards to
+lock it up, it was not to be found. No one
+had entered the room; he could not therefore
+suspect any person. At last, after much ineffectual
+search, he was persuaded that it had
+fallen from the chimney into the fire. The
+Director went to acquaint his colleagues with
+the misfortune that had happened to him;
+and as he was known to be a perfectly honourable
+man he was readily believed. It was
+only about four-and-twenty hours from the
+time that he had deposited his money; they
+thought, therefore, that it would be hard to
+refuse his request for a second bill. He received
+it upon giving an obligation to restore
+the first bill, if it should ever be found, or to
+pay the money himself, if it should be presented
+by any stranger. About thirty years
+afterwards (the Director having been long
+dead, and his heirs in possession of his fortune),
+an unknown person presented the lost
+bill at the Bank, and demanded payment. It
+was in vain that they mentioned to this person
+the transaction by which that bill was annulled;
+he would not listen to it; he maintained
+that it had come to him from abroad,
+and insisted upon immediate payment. The
+Note was payable to bearer; and the thirty
+thousand pounds were paid him. The heirs
+of the Director would not listen to any demands
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_430'>430</span>of restitution; and the Bank was
+obliged to sustain the loss. It was discovered
+afterwards that an architect having purchased
+the Director’s house, had taken it down, in
+order to build another upon the same spot,
+had found the Note in a crevice of the chimney,
+and made his discovery an engine for robbing
+the Bank.”</p>
+
+<div class='figcenter id001'>
+<img src='images/ibanknote.jpg' alt='‘Illustration' class='ig001'>
+</div>
+
+<p class='c010'>Carelessness, equal to that recorded above,
+is not at all uncommon, and gives the Bank
+enormous profit, against which the loss of a
+mere thirty thousand pound is but a trifle.
+Bank Notes have been known to light pipes, to
+wrap up snuff, to be used as curl-papers; and
+British tars, mad with rum and prize-money,
+have not unfrequently, in time of war, made
+sandwiches of them, and eaten them between
+bread-and-butter. In the forty years between
+the years 1792 and 1812 there were out-standing
+Notes (presumed to have been lost or
+destroyed) amounting to one million, three
+hundred and thirty odd thousand pounds;
+every shilling of which was clear profit to the
+Bank.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>The superannuation, death, and burial of a
+Bank of England Note is a story soon told.
+The returned Notes, or promises performed,
+are kept in “The Library” for ten years, and
+then burnt in an iron cage in one of the Bank
+yards.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>A few words on the history and general
+appearance of the Bank of England Note will
+conclude our criticism.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>The strong principle to insure the detection
+of forgery is uniformity; hence, from the very
+first Note issued by the Bank, to that, the merits
+of which we are now discussing, the same
+general design has been preserved,—only that
+the execution has been from time to time improved;
+except, we are bound to add, that of the
+signatures, some of which are still as illegible
+as ever. Originally, Notes were granted more
+in the form of Bank post-bills,—that is, not
+nominally to a member of the establishment,
+but really to the party applying for them, and
+for any sum he might require. If it suited his
+convenience, he presented his Note several
+times, drawing such lesser sums as he might
+require; precisely as if it were a letter of credit,
+after the manner of the Sailor mentioned in
+the latest edition of Joe Miller. Jack,
+somehow or other, got possession of a fifty pound
+Note; the sum was so dazzlingly
+enormous that he had not the heart, on
+presenting it for payment, to demand the
+whole sum at once, for fear of breaking the
+Bank. So, leaning confidentially over the
+counter, he whispered to the cashier, that he
+wouldn’t be hard upon ’em. He knew times
+were bad,—so, as it was all the same to him,
+he would take five sovereigns now, and the
+rest at so much a week. In like manner,
+the fac-simile on the opposite page, while
+it presents a specimen of one of the earliest
+Bank Notes in existence, shows that the
+holder took the amount as Jack proposed;—by
+instalments. It was granted to Mr. Thomas
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_431'>431</span>Powell, on the 19th of December, 1699, for
+five hundred and fifty-five pounds. His first
+draft was one hundred and thirty-one pounds,
+ten shillings, and one penny; the second “in
+gould,” three hundred and sixty; the third,
+sixty-three pounds, nine shillings, and elevenpence,
+when the note was retained by the
+Bank as having been fully honoured.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>With this curious specimen of the ancient
+Bank of England Note, we take leave of the
+modern ones—only, however, for a short time.
+In a week or two, we shall change the topic
+(as we have previously intimated) to one
+closely bearing upon it. Circumstances, however,
+demand that we should change the
+subject of it at a much earlier date.</p>
+
+<div class='chapter'>
+ <h2 class='c003'>INNOCENCE AND CRIME.<br> <span class='c007'>AN ANECDOTE.</span></h2>
+</div>
+
+<p class='c015'>A benevolent old gentleman—the late
+Mr. Harcourt Brown of Beech Hall—was
+plodding his way home to his hotel from a
+ramble in the suburbs of London; and having
+made a bold attempt at “a short cut,” soon
+found himself lost in a maze of squalid streets,
+leading one into the other, and apparently
+leading no where else. He inquired his way
+in vain. From the first person, he received a
+coarse jest; from another, a look of vacant
+stupidity; a third eyed him in dogged silence.
+He stepped with one foot into several wretched
+little shops; but the people really seemed to
+know nothing beyond the next street or alley,
+except one man, a dealer in tripe, of a strange,
+earthy colour, who called over his shoulder,
+“Oh, you’re miles out o’ your way!” The
+only exception to the general indifference,
+rudeness and stupidity, was a thin sallow-cheeked
+man, who had a fixed smile on his
+face, and spoke in rather an abject cringing
+tone of obsequiousness, and even walked up
+one street and down a second to show Mr.
+Brown the way. But it soon became evident
+that he knew nothing about the matter, and
+he slunk away with the same fixed unmeaning
+smile.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>In this state of affairs Mr. Brown buttoned
+up his coat, and manfully resolved to work his
+way out of this filthy locality by walking
+straight forward.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>Trudging onward at a smart pace, the
+worthy gentleman presently heard the sound
+of sobbing and crying, and behind the boards
+of a shed at the side of a ruined hovel he saw
+a girl of some nine or ten years of age, clasping
+and unclasping her hands in a paroxysm
+of grief and apprehension. “Oh, what <i>shall</i>
+I do?—what <i>shall</i> I do?” sobbed the child.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>She started with terror as Mr. Brown
+approached, and hid her head in the folds
+of her little apron; but on being assured by
+the mild voice of Mr. Brown that he had
+no thought of hurting her, she ventured to
+look up. She had soft blue eyes, flaxen hair
+of silvery glossiness, pretty features; and,
+notwithstanding the stain of tears down a
+cheek which had a smear of brickdust upon
+it, had a most innocent and prepossessing face.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“What is the matter, my little girl?” inquired
+Mr. Brown.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>The child turned one shoulder half round,
+and displayed the red and purple marks of
+blows from a whip or stick.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“What cruel wretch has done this?” asked
+Mr. Brown. “Tell me, child; tell me directly.”</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“It was mother,” sobbed the child.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“Ah—I’m sorry to hear this. Perhaps
+you have been naughty?”</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“Yes, Sir;” answered the child.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“Poor child,” ejaculated Mr. Brown; “but
+you will not be naughty again. What was
+your offence. Come, tell me?”</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“I shook it, Sir; oh, yes, it’s quite true; I
+did shake it very much.”</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“What did you shake?” inquired Mr.
+Brown.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“I shook the doll, Sir.”</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“The doll! Oh, you mean you shook the
+baby; that, certainly was naughty of you;”
+said Mr. Brown.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“No, Sir; it was not the baby I shook—it
+was the doll; and I’m afraid to go home—mother
+will be sure to beat me again.”</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>An impulse of benevolence led Mr. Brown’s
+hand to search for his purse. Had he tried
+the wrong pocket? His purse was on the
+other side. No, it was not—it must be in
+this inner pocket. Where <i>is</i> Mr. Brown’s
+purse? It is not in any of his pockets!
+He tries them all over again. And his
+pocket-book!—chiefly of memorandums, but
+also having a few bank notes. This is gone
+too—and his silk handkerchief—both his
+handkerchiefs!—also his silver-gilt snuff-box,
+filled with rappee only five minutes before he
+left the hotel this morning—he is certain
+he had it when he came out—but it is certainly
+gone! Every single thing he had in
+his pockets is gone.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>The child also—now <i>she</i> is gone! Mr.
+Brown looks around him, and yonder he sees
+the poor child flying with frequent looks
+behind of terror,—and now a shrill and
+frightful voice causes him to start. Turning
+in that direction, the sudden flight of the little
+girl is immediately explained. Over the
+rubbish and refuse, at a swift, wild pace,
+courses a fiendish woman, with a savage eye
+and open mouth, her cheeks hollow, her teeth
+projecting, her thin hair flying like a bit of
+diseased mane over her half-naked shoulder;
+she has a stick in her hand, with which she
+constantly threatens the flying child, whom
+her execrations follow yet more swiftly than
+her feet.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>Mr. Brown remained watching them till
+they were out of sight. He once more
+searched all his pockets, but they were all
+empty. He called to mind the man with the
+fixed smile on his hollow cadaverous cheek,
+and several other faces of men whom he had
+casually noticed in the course of the last half
+hour, thinking what a pity it was that something
+<span class='pageno' id='Page_432'>432</span>could not be done for them. He now
+began to think it was a very great pity that
+something had not <i>already</i> been done for them
+or with them, for they had certainly “done”
+him. Poor Mr. Brown!</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>Some six or seven months after this most
+disagreeable adventure, it chanced that Mr.
+Brown was going over the prison at Coldbath
+Fields, accompanied by the Governor. As
+they entered one of the wards, the voice of a
+child sobbing, attracted the ears of our philanthropist.
+In answer to his inquiries, the
+Governor informed him that it was a child of
+about eleven years of age, who had been
+detected in the act of picking a lady’s pocket
+in one of the most crowded thoroughfares.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>On a few kind words being spoken to her,
+she looked up; and in the blue eye, glossy
+flaxen hair, and pretty features, Mr. Brown
+at once recognised the little girl who had
+“shaken the doll.”</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“This child is an innocent creature!” cried
+he, turning to the Governor, “the victim of
+ignorance and cruel treatment at home. I recollect
+her well. Her mother had beaten her
+most shamefully; and the last glimpse I had
+of her was in her flight from a still more savage
+assault. And for what crime do you suppose?”</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“For not picking pockets expertly, I dare
+say:” replied the Governor.</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“Nothing of the sort!” exclaimed Mr.
+Brown. “Would you believe it, Sir; it was
+for nothing more than a childish bit of pretence-anger
+with her doll, on which occasion
+she gave the doll a good shaking. Mere pretence,
+you know.”</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“My dear Sir,” said the Governor, smiling,
+“I fancy I am right, after all. She was
+beaten for not being expert in the study and
+practice of pocket-picking at home. You are
+not, perhaps, aware that the lesson consists
+in picking the pockets of a figure which is
+hung up in the room, in such a way that the
+least awkwardness of touch makes it shake,
+and rings a little bell attached to it. This
+figure is called the ‘doll.’ Those who ring
+the bell, shake it in emptying its pockets, are
+punished according to the mind and temper
+of the instructor.”</p>
+
+<p class='c010'>“Good heavens!” ejaculated Mr. Brown,
+“to what perfection must the art be brought!
+Then it is all accounted for. The sallow gentleman
+with the fixed smile must have been
+master of the craft of not shaking the doll,
+when he took my purse, pocket-book, snuff-box,
+and both handkerchiefs from me, without
+my feeling so much as the motion of the air!”</p>
+
+<hr class='c016'>
+
+<div class='nf-center-c1'>
+<div class='nf-center c011'>
+ <div>Monthly Supplement of “HOUSEHOLD WORDS,”</div>
+ <div>Conducted by <span class='sc'>Charles Dickens</span>.</div>
+ <div class='c001'><i>Price 2d., Stamped, 3d.</i>,</div>
+ <div><span class='large'>THE HOUSEHOLD NARRATIVE</span></div>
+ <div>OF</div>
+ <div>CURRENT EVENTS.</div>
+ <div class='c001'><span class='small'><i>The Number, containing a history of the past month, was issued with the Magazines.</i></span></div>
+ </div>
+</div>
+
+<div class='pbb'>
+ <hr class='pb c017'>
+</div>
+<div class='tnotes x-ebookmaker'>
+
+<div class='chapter ph2'>
+
+<div class='nf-center-c1'>
+<div class='nf-center c018'>
+ <div>TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES</div>
+ </div>
+</div>
+
+</div>
+
+ <ul class='ul_1 c001'>
+ <li>Fixed typos; non-standard spelling and dialect retained.
+
+ </li>
+ <li>Renumbered footnotes.
+ </li>
+ </ul>
+
+</div>
+
+<div style='text-align:center'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 78183 ***</div>
+ </body>
+ <!-- created with ppgen.py 3.57i (with regex) on 2026-03-11 12:49:23 GMT -->
+</html>
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+
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+
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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for eBook #78183
+(https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/78183)