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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/7693.txt b/7693.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..3974aac --- /dev/null +++ b/7693.txt @@ -0,0 +1,2649 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook A Strange Story, by E. B. Lytton, Volume 2. +#121 in our series by Edward Bulwer-Lytton + +Copyright laws are changing all over the world. Be sure to check the +copyright laws for your country before downloading or redistributing +this or any other Project Gutenberg eBook. + +This header should be the first thing seen when viewing this Project +Gutenberg file. Please do not remove it. Do not change or edit the +header without written permission. + +Please read the "legal small print," and other information about the +eBook and Project Gutenberg at the bottom of this file. Included is +important information about your specific rights and restrictions in +how the file may be used. You can also find out about how to make a +donation to Project Gutenberg, and how to get involved. + + +**Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** + +**EBooks Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** + +*****These EBooks Were Prepared By Thousands of Volunteers***** + + +Title: A Strange Story, Volume 2. + +Author: Edward Bulwer-Lytton + +Release Date: March 2005 [EBook #7693] +[Yes, we are more than one year ahead of schedule] +[This file was first posted on April 22, 2003] + +Edition: 10 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + + + + +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK STRANGE STORY, LYTTON, V2 *** + + +This eBook was produced by Andrew Heath +and David Widger + + + + + +CHAPTER XIII. + +The next day I had just dismissed the last of my visiting patients, and +was about to enter my carriage and commence my round, when I received +a twisted note containing but these words:-- + + Call on me to-day, as soon as you can. + + M. Poyntz. + +A few minutes afterwards I was in Mrs. Poyntz's drawing-room. + +"Well, Allen Fenwick" said she, "I do not serve friends by halves. No +thanks! I but adhere to a principle I have laid down for myself. I spent +last evening with the Ashleighs. Lilian is certainly much altered,-- +very weak, I fear very ill, and I believe very unskilfuly treated by Dr. +Jones. I felt that it was my duty to insist on a change of physician; but +there was something else to consider before deciding who that physician +should be. I was bound, as your confidante, to consult your own scruples +of honour. Of course I could not say point-blank to Mrs. Ashleigh, 'Dr. +Fenwick admires your daughter, would you object to him as a son-in-law?' +Of course I could not touch at all on the secret with which you intrusted +me; but I have not the less arrived at a conclusion, in agreement with my +previous belief, that not being a woman of the world, Annie Ashleigh has +none of the ambition which women of the world would conceive for a +daughter who has a good fortune and considerable beauty; that her +predominant anxiety is forher child's happiness, and her predominant +fear is that her child will die. She would never oppose any attachment +which Lilian might form; and if that attachment were for one who had +preserved her daughter's life, I believe her own heart would gratefully +go with her daughter's. So far, then, as honour is concerned, all +scruples vanish." + +I sprang from my seat, radiant with joy. Mrs. Poyntz dryly +continued: "You value yourself on your common-sense, and to that I address +a few words of counsel which may not be welcome to your romance. I said +that I did not think you and Lilian would suit each other in the long run; +reflection confirms me in that supposition. Do not look at me so +incredulously and so sadly. Listen, and take heed. Ask yourself what, as +a man whose days are devoted to a laborious profession, whose ambition is +entwined with its success, whose mind must be absorbed in its +pursuits,--ask yourself what kind of a wife you would have sought to win; +had not this sudden fancy for a charming face rushed over your better +reason, and obliterated all previous plans and resolutions. Surely some +one with whom your heart would have been quite at rest; by whom your +thoughts would have been undistracted from the channels into which your +calling should concentrate their flow; in short, a serene companion in the +quiet holiday of a trustful home! Is it not so?" + +"You interpret my own thoughts when they have turned towards marriage. +But what is there in Lilian Ashleigh that should mar the picture you have +drawn?" + +"What is there in Lilian Ashleigh which in the least accords with the +picture? In the first place, the wife of a young physician should not be +his perpetual patient. The more he loves her, and the more worthy she may +be of love, the more her case will haunt him wherever he goes. When he +returns home, it is not to a holiday; the patient he most cares for, the +anxiety that most gnaws him, awaits him there." + +"But, good heavens! why should Lilian Ashleigh be a perpetual patient? +The sanitary resources of youth are incalculable. And--" + +"Let me stop you; I cannot argue against a physician in love! I will +give up that point in dispute, remaining convinced that there is something +in Lilian's constitution which will perplex, torment, and baffle you. It +was so with her father, whom she resembles in face and in character. He +showed no symptoms of any grave malady. His outward form was, like +Lilian's, a model of symmetry, except in this, that, like hers, it was too +exquisitely delicate; but when seemingly in the midst of perfect health, +at any slight jar on the nerves he would become alarmingly ill. I was +sure that he would die young, and he did so." + +"Ay, but Mrs. Ashleigh said that his death was from brain-fever, brought +on by over-study. Rarely, indeed, do women so fatigue the brain. No +female patient, in the range of my practice, ever died of purely mental +exertion." + +"Of purely mental exertion, no; but of heart emotion, many female +patients, perhaps? Oh, you own that! I know nothing about nerves; but I +suppose that, whether they act on the brain or the heart, the result to +life is much the same if the nerves be too finely strung for life's daily +wear and tear. And this is what I mean, when I say you and Lilian will +not suit. As yet, she is a mere child; her nature undeveloped, and her +affections therefore untried. You might suppose that you had won her +heart; she might believe that she gave it to you, and both be deceived. +If fairies nowadays condescended to exchange their offspring with those +of mortals, and if the popular tradition did not represent a fairy +changeling as an ugly peevish creature, with none of the grace of its +parents, I should be half inclined to suspect that Lilian was one of the +elfin people. She never seems at home on earth; and I do not think she +will ever be contented with a prosaic earthly lot. Now I have told you +why I do not think she will suit you. I must leave it to yourself to +conjecture how far you would suit her. I say this in due season, while +you may set a guard upon your impulse; while you may yet watch, and weigh, +and meditate; and from this moment on that subject I say no more. I lend +advice, but I never throw it away." + +She came here to a dead pause, and began putting on her bonnet and +scarf, which lay on the table beside her. I was a little chilled by her +words, and yet more by the blunt, shrewd, hard look and manner which aided +the effect of their delivery; but the chill melted away in the sudden glow +of my heart when she again turned towards me and said,-- + +"Of course you guess, from these preliminary cautions, that you are +going into danger? Mrs. Ashleigh wishes to consult you about Lilian, and +I propose to take you to her house." + +"Oh, my friend, my dear friend, how can I ever repay you?" I caught her +hand, the white firm hand, and lifted it to my lips. + +She drew it somewhat hastily away, and laying it gently on my shoulder, +said, in a soft voice, "Poor Allen, how little the world knows either of +us! But how little perhaps we know ourselves! Come, your carriage is +here? That is right; we must put down Dr. Jones publicly and in all our +state." + +In the carriage Mrs. Poyntz told me the purport of that conversation +with Mrs. Ashleigh to which I owed my re-introduction to Abbots' House. +It seems that Mr. Vigors had called early the morning after my first +visit! had evinced much discomposure on hearing that I had been summoned! +dwelt much on my injurious treatment of Dr. Lloyd, whom, as distantly +related to himself, and he (Mr. Vigors) being distantly connected with the +late Gilbert Ashleigh, he endeavoured to fasten upon his listener as one +of her husband's family, whose quarrel she was bound in honour to take up. +He spoke of me as an infidel "tainted with French doctrines," and as a +practitioner rash and presumptuous; proving his own freedom from +presumption and rashness by flatly deciding that my opinion must be +wrong. Previously to Mrs. Ashleigh's migration to L----, Mr. Vigors had +interested her in the pretended phenomena of mesmerism. He had consulted +a clairvoyante, much esteemed by poor Dr. Lloyd, as to Lilian's health, +and the clairvoyante had declared her to be constitutionally predisposed +to consumption. Mr. Vigors persuaded Mrs. Ashleigh to come at once with +him and see this clairvoyante herself, armed with a lock of Lilian's hair +and a glove she had worn, as the media of mesmerical rapport. + +The clairvoyante, one of those I had publicly denounced as an impostor, +naturally enough denounced me in return. On being asked solemnly by Mr. +Vigors "to look at Dr. Fenwick and see if his influence would be +beneficial to the subject," the sibyl had become violently agitated, and +said that, "when she looked at us together, we were enveloped in a black +cloud; that this portended affliction and sinister consequences; that our +rapport was antagonistic." Mr. Vigors then told her to dismiss my image, +and conjure up that of Dr. Jones. Therewith the somnambule became more +tranquil, and said: "Dr. Jones would do well if he would be guided by +higher lights than his own skill, and consult herself daily as to the +proper remedies. The best remedy of all would be mesmerism. But since +Dr. Lloyd's death, she did not know of a mesmerist, sufficiently gifted, +in affinity with the patient." In fine, she impressed and awed Mrs. +Ashleigh, who returned in haste, summoned Dr. Jones, and dismissed +myself. + +"I could not have conceived Mrs. Ashleigh to be so utterly wanting in +common-sense," said I. "She talked rationally enough when I saw her." + +"She has common-sense in general, and plenty of the sense most common," +answered Mrs. Poyntz; "but she is easily led and easily frightened +wherever her affections are concerned, and therefore, just as easily as +she had been persuaded by Mr. Vigors and terrified by the somnambule, I +persuaded her against the one, and terrified her against the other. I had +positive experience on my side, since it was clear that Lilian had been +getting rapidly worse under Dr. Jones's care. The main obstacles I had to +encounter in inducing Mrs. Ashleigh to consult you again were, first, her +reluctance to disoblige Mr. Vigors, as a friend and connection of Lilian's +father; and, secondly, her sentiment of shame in re-inviting your opinion +after having treated you with so little respect. Both these difficulties +I took on myself. I bring you to her house, and, on leaving you, I shall +go on to Mr. Vigors, and tell him what is done is my doing, and not to be +undone by him; so that matter is settled. Indeed, if you were out of the +question, I should not suffer Mr. Vigors to re-introduce all these +mummeries of clairvoyance and mesmerism into the precincts of the Hill. I +did not demolish a man I really liked in Dr. Lloyd, to set up a Dr. Jones, +whom I despise, in his stead. Clairvoyance on Abbey Hill, indeed! I saw +enough of it before." + +"True; your strong intellect detected at once the absurdity of the whole +pretence,--the falsity of mesmerism, the impossibility of clairvoyance." + +"No, my strong intellect did nothing of the kind. I do not know whether +mesmerism be false or clairvoyance impossible; and I don't wish to know. +All I do know is, that I saw the Hill in great danger,--young ladies +allowing themselves to be put to sleep by gentlemen, and pretending they +had no will of their own against such fascination! Improper and shocking! +And Miss Brabazon beginning to prophesy, and Mrs. Leopold Smythe +questioning her maid (whom Dr. Lloyd declared to be highly gifted) as to +all the secrets of her friends. When I saw this, I said, 'The Hill is +becoming demoralized; the Hill is making itself ridiculous; the Hill must +be saved!' I remonstrated with Dr. Lloyd as a friend; he remained +obdurate. I annihilated him as an enemy, not to me but to the State. I +slew my best lover for the good of Rome. Now you know why I took your +part,--not because I have any opinion, one way or the other, as to the +truth or falsehood of what Dr. Lloyd asserted; but I have a strong opinion +that, whether they be true or false, his notions were those which are not +to be allowed on the Hill. And so, Allen Fenwick, that matter was +settled." + +Perhaps at another time I might have felt some little humiliation to learn +that I had been honoured with the influence of this great potentate not as +a champion of truth, but as an instrument of policy; and I might have +owned to some twinge of conscience in having assisted to sacrifice a +fellow-seeker after science--misled, no doubt, but preferring his +independent belief to his worldly interest--and sacrifice him to +those deities with whom science is ever at war,--the Prejudices of a +Clique sanctified into the Proprieties of the World. But at that moment +the words I heard made no perceptible impression on my mind. The gables +of Abbots' House were visible above the evergreens and lilacs; another +moment, and the carriage stopped at the door. + + + + +CHAPTER XIV. + +Mrs. Ashleigh received us in the dining-room. Her manner to me, at first, +was a little confused and shy. But my companion soon communicated +something of her own happy ease to her gentler friend. After a short +conversation we all three went to Lilian, who was in a little room on the +ground-floor, fitted up as her study. I was glad to perceive that my +interdict of the deathchamber had been respected. + +She reclined on a sofa near the window, which was, however, jealously +closed; the light of the bright May-day obscured by blinds and curtains; a +large fire on the hearth; the air of the room that of a hot-house,--the +ignorant, senseless, exploded system of nursing into consumption those who +are confined on suspicion of it! She did not heed us as we entered +noiselessly; her eyes were drooped languidly on the floor, and with +difficulty I suppressed the exclamation that rose to my lips on seeing +her. She seemed within the last few days so changed, and on the aspect of +the countenance there was so profound a melancholy! But as she slowly +turned at the sound of our footsteps, and her eyes met mine, a quick blush +came into the wan cheek, and she half rose, but sank back as if the effort +exhausted her. There was a struggle for breath, and a low hollow cough. +Was it possible that I had been mistaken, and that in that cough was heard +the warning knell of the most insidious enemy to youthful life? + +I sat down by her side; I lured her on to talk of indifferent +subjects,--the weather, the gardens, the bird in the cage, which was +placed on the table near her. Her voice, at first low and feeble, became +gradually stronger, and her face lighted up with a child's innocent, +playful smile. No, I had not been mistaken! That was no lymphatic, +nerveless temperament, on which consumption fastens as its lawful prey; +here there was no hectic pulse, no hurried waste of the vital flame. +Quietly and gently I made my observations, addressed my questions, +applied my stethoscope; and when I turned my face towards her mother's +anxious, eager eyes, that face told my opinion; for her mother sprang +forward, clasped my hand, and said, through her struggling tears,-- + +"You smile! You see nothing to fear?" + +"Fear! No, indeed! You will soon be again yourself, Miss Ashleigh, will +you not?" + +"Yes," she said, with her sweet laugh, "I shall be well now very soon. +But may I not have the window open; may I not go into the garden? I so +long for fresh air." + +"No, no, darling," exclaimed Mrs. Ashleigh, "not while the east winds +last. Dr. Jones said on no account. On no account, Dr. Fenwick, eh?" + +"Will you take my arm, Miss Ashleigh, for a few turns up and down the +room?" said I. "We will then see how far we may rebel against Dr. Jones." + +She rose with some little effort, but there was no cough. At first her +step was languid; it became lighter and more elastic after a few moments. + +"Let her come out," said I to Mrs. Ashleigh. "The wind is not in the +east, and, while we are out, pray bid your servant lower to the last bar +in the grate that fire,--only fit for Christmas." + +"But--" + +"Ah, no buts! He is a poor doctor who is not a stern despot." + +So the straw hat and mantle were sent for. Lilian was wrapped with +unnecessary care, and we all went forth into the garden. Involuntarily we +took the way to the Monk's Well, and at every step Lilian seemed to revive +under the bracing air and temperate sun. We paused by the well. + +"You do not feel fatigued, Miss Ashleigh?" + +"No." + +"But your face seems changed. It is grown sadder." + +"Not sadder." + +"Sadder than when I first saw it,--saw it when you were seated here!" I +said this in a whisper. I felt her hand tremble as it lay on my arm. + +"You saw me seated here!" + +"Yes. I will tell you how some day." + +Lilian lifted her eyes to mine, and there was in them that same surprise +which I had noticed on my first visit,--a surprise that perplexed me, +blended with no displeasure, but yet with a something of vague alarm. + +We soon returned to the house. + +Mrs. Ashleigh made me a sign to follow her into the drawing-room, leaving +Mrs. Poyntz with Lilian. + +"Well?" said she, tremblingly. + +"Permit me to see Dr. Jones's prescriptions. Thank you. Ay, I thought +so. My dear madam, the mistake here has been in depressing nature instead +of strengthening; in narcotics instead of stimulants. The main stimulants +which leave no reaction are air and light. Promise me that I may have my +own way for a week,--that all I recommend will be implicitly heeded?" + +"I promise. But that cough,--you noticed it?" + +"Yes. The nervous system is terribly lowered, and nervous exhaustion is a +strange impostor; it imitates all manner of complaints with which it has +no connection. The cough will soon disappear! But pardon my question. +Mrs. Poyntz tells me that you consulted a clairvoyants about your +daughter. Does Miss Ashleigh know that you did so?" + +"No; I did not tell her." + +"I am glad of that. And pray, for Heaven's sake, guard her against all +that may set her thinking on such subjects. Above all, guard her against +concentring attention on any malady that your fears erroneously ascribe to +her. It is amongst the phenomena of our organization that you cannot +closely rivet your consciousness on any part of the frame, however +healthy, but it will soon begin to exhibit morbid sensibility. Try to fix +all your attention on your little finger for half an hour, and before the +half hour is over the little finger will be uneasy, probably even +painful. How serious, then, is the danger to a young girl, at the age in +which imagination is most active, most intense, if you force upon her a +belief that she is in danger of a mortal disease! It is a peculiarity of +youth to brood over the thought of early death much more resignedly, much +more complacently, than we do in maturer years. Impress on a young +imaginative girl, as free from pulmonary tendencies as you and I are, the +conviction that she must fade away into the grave, and though she may not +actually die of consumption, you instil slow poison into her system. Hope +is the natural aliment of youth. You impoverish nourishment where you +discourage hope. As soon as this temporary illness is over, reject for +your daughter the melancholy care which seems to her own mind to mark her +out from others of her age. Rear her for the air, which is the kindest +life-giver; to sleep with open windows: to be out at sunrise. Nature +will do more for her than all our drugs can do. You have been hitherto +fearing Nature; now trust to her." + +Here Mrs. Poyntz joined us, and having, while I had been speaking, written +my prescription and some general injunctions, I closed my advice with an +appeal to that powerful protectress. + +"This, my dear madam, is a case in which I need your aid, and I ask it. +Miss Ashleigh should not be left with no other companion than her mother. +A change of faces is often as salutary as a change of air. If you could +devote an hour or two this very evening to sit with Miss Ashleigh, to talk +to her with your usual cheerfulness, and--" + +"Annie," interrupted Mrs. Poyntz, "I will come and drink tea with you at +half-past seven, and bring my knitting; and perhaps, if you ask him, Dr. +Fenwick will come too! He can be tolerably entertaining when he likes it." + +"It is too great a tax on his kindness, I fear," said Mrs. Ashleigh. +"But," she added cordially, "I should be grateful indeed if he would spare +us an hour of his time." + +I murmured an assent which I endeavoured to make not too joyous. + +"So that matter is settled," said Mrs. Poyntz; "and now I shall go to Mr. +Vigors and prevent his further interference." + +"Oh, but, Margaret, pray don't offend him,--a connection of my poor dear +Gilbert's. And so tetchy! I am sure I do not know how you'll manage +to--" + +"To get rid of him? Never fear. As I manage everything and everybody," +said Mrs. Poyntz, bluntly. So she kissed her friend on the forehead, gave +me a gracious nod, and, declining the offer of my carriage, walked with +her usual brisk, decided tread down the short path towards the town. + +Mrs. Ashleigh timidly approached me, and again the furtive hand bashfully +insinuated the hateful fee. + +"Stay," said I; "this is a case which needs the most constant watching. I +wish to call so often that I should seem the most greedy of doctors if my +visits were to be computed at guineas. Let me be at ease to effect my +cure; my pride of science is involved in it. And when amongst all the +young ladies of the Hill you can point to none with a fresher bloom, or a +fairer promise of healthful life, than the patient you intrust to my care, +why, then the fee and the dismissal. Nay, nay; I must refer you to our +friend Mrs. Poyntz. It was so settled with her before she brought me here +to displace Dr. Jones." Therewith I escaped. + + + + +CHAPTER XV. + +In less than a week Lilian was convalescent; in less than a fortnight she +regained her usual health,--nay, Mrs. Ashleigh declared that she had never +known her daughter appear so cheerful and look so well. I had established +a familiar intimacy at Abbots' House; most of my evenings were spent +there. As horse exercise formed an important part of my advice, Mrs. +Ashleigh had purchased a pretty and quiet horse for her daughter; and, +except the weather was very unfavourable, Lilian now rode daily with +Colonel Poyntz, who was a notable equestrian, and often accompanied by +Miss Jane Poyntz, and other young ladies of the Hill. I was generally +relieved from my duties in time to join her as she returned homewards. +Thus we made innocent appointments, openly, frankly, in her mother's +presence, she telling me beforehand in what direction excursions had been +planned with Colonel Poyntz, and I promising to fall in with the party--if +my avocations would permit. At my suggestion, Mrs. Ashleigh now opened +her house almost every evening to some of the neighbouring families; +Lilian was thus habituated to the intercourse of young persons of her own +age. Music and dancing and childlike games made the old house gay. And +the Hill gratefully acknowledged to Mrs. Poyntz, "that the Ashleighs were +indeed a great acquisition." + +But my happiness was not uncheckered. In thus unselfishly surrounding +Lilian with others, I felt the anguish of that jealousy which is +inseparable from those earlier stages of love, when the lover as yet has +won no right to that self-confidence which can only spring from the +assurance that he is loved. + +In these social reunions I remained aloof from Lilian. I saw her courted +by the gay young admirers whom her beauty and her fortune drew around +her,--her soft face brightening in the exercise of the dance, which the +gravity of my profession rather than my years forbade to join; and her +laugh, so musically subdued, ravishing my ear and fretting my heart as if +the laugh were a mockery on my sombre self and my presumptuous dreams. +But no, suddenly, shyly, her eyes would steal away from those about her, +steal to the corner in which I sat, as if they missed me, and, meeting my +own gaze, their light softened before they turned away; and the colour on +her cheek would deepen, and to her lip there came a smile different from +the smile that it shed on others. And then--and then--all jealousy, all +sadness vanished, and I felt the glory which blends with the growing +belief that we are loved. + +In that diviner epoch of man's mysterious passion, when ideas of +perfection and purity, vague and fugitive before, start forth and +concentre themselves round one virgin shape,--that rises out from the sea +of creation, welcomed by the Hours and adorned by the Graces,--how the +thought that this archetype of sweetness and beauty singles himself from +the millions, singles himself for her choice, ennobles and lifts up his +being! Though after-experience may rebuke the mortal's illusion, that +mistook for a daughter of Heaven a creature of clay like himself, yet for +a while the illusion has grandeur. Though it comes from the senses which +shall later oppress and profane it, the senses at first shrink into shade, +awed and hushed by the presence that charms them. All that is brightest +and best in the man has soared up like long-dormant instincts of Heaven, +to greet and to hallow what to him seems life's fairest dream of the +heavenly! Take the wings from the image of Love, and the god disappears +from the form! + +Thus, if at moments jealous doubt made my torture, so the moment's relief +from it sufficed for my rapture. But I had a cause for disquiet less +acute but less varying than jealousy. + +Despite Lilian's recovery from the special illness which had more +immediately absorbed my care, I remained perplexed as to its cause and +true nature. To her mother I gave it the convenient epithet of "nervous;" +but the epithet did not explain to myself all the symptoms I classified by +it. There was still, at times, when no cause was apparent or +conjecturable, a sudden change in the expression of her countenance, in +the beat of her pulse; the eye would become fixed, the bloom would vanish, +the pulse would sink feebler and feebler till it could be scarcely felt; +yet there was no indication of heart disease, of which such sudden +lowering of life is in itself sometimes a warning indication. The change +would pass away after a few minutes, during which she seemed unconscious, +or, at least, never spoke--never appeared to heed what was said to her. +But in the expression of her countenance there was no character of +suffering or distress; on the contrary, a wondrous serenity, that made her +beauty more beauteous, her very youthfulness younger; and when this +spurious or partial kind of syncope passed, she recovered at once without +effort, without acknowledging that she had felt faint or unwell, but +rather with a sense of recruited vitality, as the weary obtain from a +sleep. For the rest her spirits were more generally light and joyous than +I should have premised from her mother's previous description. She would +enter mirthfully into the mirth of young companions round her: she had +evidently quick perception of the sunny sides of life; an infantine +gratitude for kindness; an infantine joy in the trifles that amuse only +those who delight in tastes pure and simple. But when talk rose into +graver and more contemplative topics, her attention became earnest and +absorbed; and sometimes a rich eloquence, such as I have never before nor +since heard from lips so young, would startle me first into a wondering +silence, and soon into a disapproving alarm: for the thoughts she then +uttered seemed to me too fantastic, too visionary, too much akin to the +vagaries of a wild though beautiful imagination. And then I would seek to +check, to sober, to distract fancies with which my reason had no sympathy, +and the indulgence of which I regarded as injurious to the normal +functions of the brain. + +When thus, sometimes with a chilling sentence, sometimes with a +half-sarcastic laugh, I would repress outpourings frank and musical as the +songs of a forest-bird, she would look at me with a kind of plaintive +sorrow,--often sigh and shiver as she turned away. Only in those modes +did she show displeasure; otherwise ever sweet and docile, and ever, if, +seeing that I had pained her, I asked forgiveness, humbling herself rather +to ask mine, and brightening our reconciliation with her angel smile. As +yet I had not dared to speak of love; as yet I gazed on her as the captive +gazes on the flowers and the stars through the gratings of his cell, +murmuring to himself, "When shall the doors unclose?" + + + + +CHAPTER XVI. + +It was with a wrath suppressed in the presence of the fair ambassadress, +that Mr. Vigors had received from Mrs. Poyntz the intelligence that I had +replaced Dr. Jones at Abbots' House not less abruptly than Dr. Jones had +previously supplanted me. As Mrs. Poyntz took upon herself the whole +responsibility of this change, Mr. Vigors did not venture to condemn it to +her face; for the Administrator of Laws was at heart no little in awe of +the Autocrat of Proprieties; as Authority, howsoever established, is in +awe of Opinion, howsoever capricious. + +To the mild Mrs. Ashleigh the magistrate's anger was more decidedly +manifested. He ceased his visits; and in answer to a long and deprecatory +letter with which she endeavoured to soften his resentment and win him +back to the house, he replied by an elaborate combination of homily and +satire. He began by excusing himself from accepting her invitations, on +the ground that his time was valuable, his habits domestic; and though +ever willing to sacrifice both time and habits where he could do good, he +owed it to himself and to mankind to sacrifice neither where his advice +was rejected and his opinion contemned. He glanced briefly, but not +hastily, at the respect with which her late husband had deferred to his +judgment, and the benefits which that deference had enabled him to bestow. +He contrasted the husband's deference with the widow's contumely, and +hinted at the evils which the contumely would not permit him to prevent. +He could not presume to say what women of the world might think due to +deceased husbands, but even women of the world generally allowed the +claims of living children, and did not act with levity where their +interests were concerned, still less where their lives were at stake. As +to Dr. Jones, he, Mr. Vigors, had the fullest confidence in his skill. +Mrs. Ashleigh must judge for herself whether Mrs. Poyntz was as good an +authority upon medical science as he had no doubt she was upon shawls and +ribbons. Dr. Jones was a man of caution and modesty; he did not indulge +in the hollow boasts by which charlatans decoy their dupes; but Dr. Jones +had privately assured him that though the case was one that admitted of no +rash experiments, he had no fear of the result if his own prudent system +were persevered in. What might be the consequences of any other system, +Dr. Jones would not say, because he was too high-minded to express his +distrust of the rival who had made use of underhand arts to supplant him. +But Mr. Vigors was convinced, from other sources of information (meaning, +I presume, the oracular prescience of his clairvoyants), that the time +would come when the poor young lady would herself insist on discarding Dr. +Fenwick, and when "that person" would appear in a very different light to +many who now so fondly admired and so reverentially trusted him. When +that time arrived, he, Mr. Vigors, might again be of use; but, meanwhile, +though he declined to renew his intimacy at Abbots' House, or to pay +unavailing visits of mere ceremony, his interest in the daughter of his +old friend remained undiminished, nay, was rather increased by compassion; +that he should silently keep his eye upon her; and whenever anything to +her advantage suggested itself to him, he should not be deterred by the +slight with which Mrs. Ashleigh had treated his judgment from calling on +her, and placing before her conscience as a mother his ideas for her +child's benefit, leaving to herself then, as now, the entire +responsibility of rejecting the advice which he might say, without vanity, +was deemed of some value by those who could distinguish between sterling +qualities and specious pretences. + +Mrs. Ashleigh's was that thoroughly womanly nature which instinctively +leans upon others. She was diffident, trustful, meek, affectionate. Not +quite justly had Mrs. Poyntz described her as "commonplace weak," for +though she might be called weak, it was not because she was commonplace; +she had a goodness of heart, a sweetness of disposition, to which that +disparaging definition could not apply. She could only be called +commonplace inasmuch as in the ordinary daily affairs of life she had a +great deal of ordinary daily commonplace good-sense. Give her a routine +to follow, and no routine could be better adhered to. In the allotted +sphere of a woman's duties she never seemed in fault. No household, not +even Mrs. Poyntz's, was more happily managed. The old Abbots' House had +merged its original antique gloom in the softer character of pleasing +repose. All her servants adored Mrs. Ashleigh; all found it a pleasure to +please her; her establishment had the harmony of clockwork; comfort +diffused itself round her like quiet sunshine round a sheltered spot. To +gaze on her pleasing countenance, to listen to the simple talk that lapsed +from her guileless lips, in even, slow, and lulling murmur, was in itself +a respite from "eating cares." She was to the mind what the colour of +green is to the eye. She had, therefore, excellent sense in all that +relates to every-day life. There, she needed not to consult another; +there, the wisest might have consulted her with profit. But the moment +anything, however trivial in itself, jarred on the routine to which her +mind had grown wedded, the moment an incident hurried her out of the +beaten track of woman's daily life, then her confidence forsook her; then +she needed a confidant, an adviser; and by that confidant or adviser she +could be credulously lured or submissively controlled. Therefore, when +she lost, in Mr. Vigors, the guide she had been accustomed to consult +whenever she needed guidance, she turned; helplessly and piteously, first +to Mrs. Poyntz, and then yet more imploringly to me, because a woman of +that character is never quite satisfied without the advice of a man; and +where an intimacy more familiar than that of his formal visits is once +established with a physician, confidence in him grows fearless and rapid, +as the natural result of sympathy concentrated on an object of anxiety in +common between himself and the home which opens its sacred recess to his +observant but tender eye. Thus Mrs. Ashleigh had shown me Mr. Vigors's +letter, and, forgetting that I might not be as amiable as herself, +besought me to counsel her how to conciliate and soften her lost +husband's friend and connection. That character clothed him with dignity +and awe in her soft forgiving eyes. So, smothering my own resentment, +less perhaps at the tone of offensive insinuation against myself than at +the arrogance with which this prejudiced intermeddler implied to a mother +the necessity of his guardian watch over a child under her own care, I +sketched a reply which seemed to me both dignified and placatory, +abstaining from all discussion, and conveying the assurance that Mrs. +Ashleigh would be at all times glad to hear, and disposed to respect, +whatever suggestion so esteemed a friend of her husband would kindly +submit to her for the welfare of her daughter. + +There all communication had stopped for about a month since the date of my +reintroduction to Abbots' House. One afternoon I unexpectedly met Mr. +Vigors at the entrance of the blind lane, I on my way to Abbots' House, +and my first glance at his face told me that he was coming from it, for +the expression of that face was more than usually sinister; the sullen +scowl was lit into significant menace by a sneer of unmistakable triumph. +I felt at once that he had succeeded in some machination against me, and +with ominous misgivings quickened my steps. + +I found Mrs. Ashleigh seated alone in front of the house, under a large +cedar-tree that formed a natural arbour in the centre of the sunny lawn. +She was perceptibly embarrassed as I took my seat beside her. + +"I hope," said I, forcing a smile, "that Mr. Vigors has not been telling +you that I shall kill my patient, or that she looks much worse than she +did under Dr. Jones's care?" + +"No," she said. "He owned cheerfully that Lilian had grown quite strong, +and said, without any displeasure, that he had heard how gay she had been, +riding out and even dancing,--which is very kind in him, for he +disapproves of dancing, on principle." + +"But still I can see he has said something to vex or annoy you; and, to +judge by his countenance when I met him in the lane, I should conjecture +that that something was intended to lower the confidence you so kindly +repose in me." + +"I assure you not; he did not mention your name, either to me or to +Lilian. I never knew him more friendly; quite like old times. He is a +good man at heart, very, and was much attached to my poor husband." + +"Did Mr. Ashleigh profess a very high opinion of Mr. Vigors?" + +"Well, I don't quite know that, because my dear Gilbert never spoke to me +much about him. Gilbert was naturally very silent. But he shrank from +all trouble--all worldly affairs--and Mr. Vigors managed his estate, and +inspected his steward's books, and protected him through a long lawsuit +which he had inherited from his father. It killed his father. I don't +know what we should have done without Mr. Vigors, and I am so glad he has +forgiven me." + +"Hem! Where is Miss Ashleigh? Indoors?" + +"No; somewhere in the grounds. But, my dear Dr. Fenwick, do not leave me +yet; you are so very, very kind, and somehow I have grown to look upon you +quite as an old friend. Something has happened which has put me out, +quite put me out." + +She said this wearily and feebly, closing her eyes as if she were indeed +put out in the sense of extinguished. + +"The feeling of friendship you express," said I, with earnestness, "is +reciprocal. On my side it is accompanied by a peculiar gratitude. I am a +lonely man, by a lonely fireside, no parents, no near kindred, and in this +town, since Dr. Faber left it, without cordial intimacy till I knew you. +In admitting me so familiarly to your hearth, you have given me what I +have never known before since I came to man's estate,--a glimpse of the +happy domestic life; the charm and relief to eye, heart, and spirit which +is never known but in households cheered by the face of woman. Thus my +sentiment for you and yours is indeed that of an old friend; and in any +private confidence you show me, I feel as if I were no longer a lonely +man, without kindred, without home." + +Mrs. Ashleigh seemed much moved by these words, which my heart had forced +from my lips; and, after replying to me with simple unaffected warmth of +kindness, she rose, took my arm, and continued thus as we walked slowly to +and fro the lawn: "You know, perhaps, that my poor husband left a sister, +now a widow like myself, Lady Haughton." + +"I remember that Mrs. Poyntz said you had such a sister-in-law, but I +never heard you mention Lady Haughton till now. Well!" + +"Well, Mr. Vigors has brought me a letter from her, and it is that which +has put me out. I dare say you have not heard me speak before of Lady +Haughton, for I am ashamed to say I had almost forgotten her existence. +She is many years older than my husband was; of a very different +character. Only came once to see him after our marriage. Hurt me by +ridiculing him as a bookworm; offended him by looking a little down on me, +as a nobody without spirit and fashion, which was quite true. And, except +by a cold and unfeeling letter of formal condolence after I lost my dear +Gilbert, I have never heard from her since I have been a widow, till +to-day. But, after all, she is my poor husband's sister, and his eldest +sister, and Lilian's aunt; and, as Mr. Vigors says, 'Duty is duty.'" + +Had Mrs. Ashleigh said "Duty is torture," she could not have uttered the +maxim with more mournful and despondent resignation. + +"And what does this lady require of you, which Mr. Vigors deems it your +duty to comply with?" + +"Dear me! What penetration! You have guessed the exact truth. But I +think you will agree with Mr. Vigors. Certainly I have no option; yes, I +must do it." + +"My penetration is in fault now. Do what? Pray explain." + +"Poor Lady Haughton, six months ago, lost her only son, Sir James. Mr. +Vigors says he was a very fine young man, of whom any mother would have +been proud. I had heard he was wild; Mr. Vigors says, however, that he +was just going to reform, and marry a young lady whom his mother chose for +him, when, unluckily, he would ride a steeplechase, not being quite sober +at the time, and broke his neck. Lady Haughton has been, of course, in +great grief. She has retired to Brighton; and she wrote to me from +thence, and Mr. Vigors brought the letter. He will go back to her +to-day." + +"Will go back to Lady Haughton? What! Has he been to her? Is he, then, +as intimate with Lady Haughton as he was with her brother?" + +"No; but there has been a long and constant correspondence. She had a +settlement on the Kirby Estate,--a sum which was not paid off during +Gilbert's life; and a very small part of the property went to Sir James, +which part Mr. Ashleigh Sumner, the heir-at-law to the rest of the estate, +wished Mr. Vigors, as his guardian, to buy during his minority, and as it +was mixed up with Lady Haughton's settlement her consent was necessary as +well as Sir James's. So there was much negotiation, and, since then, +Ashleigh Sumner has come into the Haughton property, on poor Sir James's +decease; so that complicated all affairs between Mr. Vigors and Lady +Haughton, and he has just been to Brighton to see her. And poor Lady +Haughton, in short, wants me and Lilian to go and visit her. I don't like +it at all. But you said the other day you thought sea air might be good +for Lilian during the heat of the summer, and she seems well enough +now for the change. What do you think?" + +"She is well enough, certainly. But Brighton is not the place I would +recommend for the summer; it wants shade, and is much hotter than L----" + +"Yes; but unluckily Lady Haughton foresaw that objection, and she has a +jointure-house some miles from Brighton, and near the sea. She says the +grounds are well wooded, and the place is proverbially cool and healthy, +not far from St. Leonard's Forest. And, in short, I have written to say +we will come. So we must, unless, indeed, you positively forbid it." + +"When do you think of going?" + +"Next Monday. Mr. Vigors would make me fix the day. If you knew how I +dislike moving when I am once settled; and I do so dread Lady Haughton, +she is so fine, and so satirical! But Mr. Vigors says she is very much +altered, poor thing! I should like to show you her letter, but I bad just +sent it to Margaret--Mrs. Poyntz--a minute or two before you came. She +knows something of Lady Haughton. Margaret knows everybody. And we shall +have to go in mourning for poor Sir James, I suppose; and Margaret will +choose it, for I am sure I can't guess to what extent we should be +supposed to mourn. I ought to have gone in mourning before--poor +Gilbert's nephew--but I am so stupid, and I had never seen him. And--But +oh, this is kind! Margaret herself,--my dear Margaret!" + +We had just turned away from the house, in our up-and-down walk; and Mrs. +Poyntz stood immediately fronting us. "So, Anne, you have actually +accepted this invitation--and for Monday next?" + +"Yes. Did I do wrong?" + +"What does Dr. Fenwick say? Can Lilian go with safety?" + +I could not honestly say she might not go with safety, but my heart sank +like lead as I answered,-- + +"Miss Ashleigh does not now need merely medical care; but more than half +her cure has depended on keeping her spirits free from depression. She +may miss the cheerful companionship of your daughter, and other young +ladies of her own age. A very melancholy house, saddened by a recent +bereavement, without other guests; a hostess to whom she is a stranger, +and whom Mrs. Ashleigh herself appears to deem formidable,--certainly +these do not make that change of scene which a physician would recommend. +When I spoke of sea air being good for Miss Ashleigh, I thought of our own +northern coasts at a later time of the year, when I could escape myself +for a few weeks and attend her. The journey to a northern watering-place +would be also shorter and less fatiguing; the air there more +invigorating." + +"No doubt that would be better," said Mrs. Poyntz, dryly; "but so far as +your objections to visiting Lady Haughton have been stated, they are +groundless. Her house will not be melancholy; she will have other guests, +and Lilian will find companions, young like herself,--young ladies--and +young gentlemen too!" + +There was something ominous, something compassionate, in the look which +Mrs. Poyntz cast upon me, in concluding her speech, which in itself was +calculated to rouse the fears of a lover. Lilian away from me, in the +house of a worldly-fine lady--such as I judged Lady Haughton to +be--surrounded by young gentlemen, as well as young ladies, by admirers, +no doubt, of a higher rank and more brilliant fashion than she had yet +known! I closed my eyes, and with strong effort suppressed a groan. + +"My dear Annie, let me satisfy myself that Dr. Fenwick really does consent +to this journey. He will say to me what he may not to you. Pardon me, +then, if I take him aside for a few minutes. Let me find you here again +under this cedar-tree." + +Placing her arm in mine, and without waiting for Mrs. Ashleigh's answer, +Mrs. Poyntz drew me into the more sequestered walk that belted the lawn; +and when we were out of Mrs. Ashleigh's sight and hearing, said,-- + +"From what you have now seen of Lilian Ashleigh, do you still desire to +gain her as your wife?" + +"Still? Ob, with an intensity proportioned to the fear with which I now +dread that she is about to pass away from my eyes--from my life!" + +"Does your judgment confirm the choice of your heart? Reflect before you +answer." + +"Such selfish judgment as I had before I knew her would not confirm but +oppose it. The nobler judgment that now expands all my reasonings, +approves and seconds my heart. No, no; do not smile so sarcastically. +This is not the voice of a blind and egotistical passion. Let me explain +myself if I can. I concede to you that Lilian's character is undeveloped; +I concede to you, that amidst the childlike freshness and innocence of her +nature, there is at times a strangeness, a mystery, which I have not yet +traced to its cause. But I am certain that the intellect is organically +as sound as the heart, and that intellect and heart will ultimately--if +under happy auspices--blend in that felicitous union which constitutes the +perfection of woman. But it is because she does, and may for years, may +perhaps always, need a more devoted, thoughtful care than natures less +tremulously sensitive, that my judgment sanctions my choice; for whatever +is best for her is best for me. And who would watch over her as I +should?" + +"You have never yet spoken to Lilian as lovers speak?" + +"Oh, no, indeed." + +"And, nevertheless, you believe that your affection would not be +unreturned?" + +"I thought so once; I doubt now,--yet, in doubting, hope. But why do you +alarm me with these questions? You, too, forebode that in this visit I +may lose her forever?" + +"If you fear that, tell her so, and perhaps her answer may dispel your +fear." + +"What! now, already, when she has scarcely known me a month. Might I not +risk all if too premature?" + +"There is no almanac for love. With many women love is born the moment +they know they are beloved. All wisdom tells us that a moment once gone +is irrevocable. Were I in your place, I should feel that I approached a +moment that I must not lose. I have said enough; now I shall rejoin Mrs. +Ashleigh." + +"Stay--tell me first what Lady Haughton's letter really contains to prompt +the advice with which you so transport, and yet so daunt, me when you +proffer it." + +"Not now; later, perhaps,--not now. If you wish to see Lilian alone, she +is by the Old Monk's Well; I saw her seated there as I passed that way to +the house." + +"One word more,--only one. Answer this question frankly, for it is one of +honour. Do you still believe that my suit to her daughter would not be +disapproved of by Mrs. Ashleigh?" + +"At this moment I am sure it would not; a week hence I might not give you +the same answer." + +So she passed on with her quick but measured tread, back through the shady +walk, on to the open lawn, till the last glimpse of her pale gray robe +disappeared under the boughs of the cedar-tree. Then, with a start, I +broke the irresolute, tremulous suspense in which I had vainly endeavoured +to analyze my own mind, solve my own doubts, concentrate my own will, and +went the opposite way, skirting the circle of that haunted ground,--as +now, on one side its lofty terrace, the houses of the neighbouring city +came full and close into view, divided from my fairy-land of life but by +the trodden murmurous thoroughfare winding low beneath the ivied parapets; +and as now, again, the world of men abruptly vanished behind the screening +foliage of luxuriant June. + +At last the enchanted glade opened out from the verdure, its borders +fragrant with syringa and rose and woodbine; and there, by the gray +memorial of the gone Gothic age, my eyes seemed to close their unquiet +wanderings, resting spell-bound on that image which had become to me the +incarnation of earth's bloom and youth. + +She stood amidst the Past, backed by the fragments of walls which man had +raised to seclude him from human passion, locking, under those lids so +downcast, the secret of the only knowledge I asked from the boundless +Future. + +Ah! what mockery there is in that grand word, the world's fierce +war-cry,--Freedom! Who has not known one period of life, and that so +solemn that its shadows may rest over all life hereafter, when one human +creature has over him a sovereignty more supreme and absolute than Orient +servitude adores in the symbols of diadem and sceptre? What crest so +haughty that has not bowed before a hand which could exalt or humble! +What heart so dauntless that has not trembled to call forth the voice at +whose sound open the gates of rapture or despair! That life alone is free +which rules, and suffices for itself. That life we forfeit when we love! + + + + +CHAPTER XVII. + +How did I utter it? By what words did my heart make itself known? I +remember not. All was as a dream that falls upon a restless, feverish +night, and fades away as the eyes unclose on the peace of a cloudless +heaven, on the bliss of a golden sun. A new morrow seemed indeed upon the +earth when I woke from a life-long yesterday,--her dear hand in mine, her +sweet face bowed upon my breast. + +And then there was that melodious silence in which there is no sound +audible from without; yet within us there is heard a lulling celestial +music, as if our whole being, grown harmonious with the universe, joined +from its happy deeps in the hymn that unites the stars. + +In that silence our two hearts seemed to make each other understood, to be +drawing nearer and nearer, blending by mysterious concord into the +completeness of a solemn union, never henceforth to be rent +asunder. + +At length I said softly: "And it was here on this spot that I first saw +you,--here that I for the first time knew what power to change our world +and to rule our future goes forth from the charm of a human face!" + +Then Lilian asked me timidly, and without lifting her eyes, how I had so +seen her, reminding me that I promised to tell her, and had never yet done +so. + +And then I told her of the strange impulse that bad led me into the +grounds, and by what chance my steps had been diverted down the path that +wound to the glade; how suddenly her form had shone upon my eyes, +gathering round itself the rose hues of the setting sun, and how wistfully +those eyes had followed her own silent gaze into the distant heaven. + +As I spoke, her hand pressed mine eagerly, convulsively, and, raising her +face from my breast, she looked at me with an intent, anxious earnestness. +That look!--twice before it had thrilled and perplexed me. + +"What is there in that look, oh, my Lilian, which tells me that there is +something that startles you,--something you wish to confide, and yet +shrink from explaining? See how, already, I study the fair book from +which the seal has been lifted! but as yet you must aid me to construe its +language." + +"If I shrink from explaining, it is only because I fear that I cannot +explain so as to be understood or believed. But you have a right to know +the secrets of a life which you would link to your own. Turn your face +aside from me; a reproving look, an incredulous smile, chill--oh, you +cannot guess how they chill me, when I would approach that which to me is +so serious and so solemnly strange." + +I turned my face away, and her voice grew firmer as, after a brief pause, +she resumed,-- + +"As far back as I can remember in my infancy, there have been moments when +there seems to fall a soft hazy veil between my sight and the things +around it, thickening and deepening till it has the likeness of one of +those white fleecy clouds which gather on the verge of the horizon when +the air is yet still, but the winds are about to rise; and then this +vapour or veil will suddenly open, as clouds open, and let in the blue +sky." + +"Go on," I said gently, for here she came to a stop. She continued, +speaking somewhat more hurriedly,-- + +"Then, in that opening, strange appearances present them selves to me, as +in a vision. In my childhood these were chiefly landscapes of wonderful +beauty. I could but faintly describe them then; I could not attempt to +describe them now, for they are almost gone from my memory. My dear +mother chid me for telling her what I saw, so I did not impress it on my +mind by repeating it. As I grew up, this kind of vision--if I may so call +it--became much less frequent, or much less distinct; I still saw the soft +veil fall, the pale cloud form and open, but often what may then have +appeared was entirely forgotten when I recovered myself, waking as from a +sleep. Sometimes, however, the recollection would be vivid and complete; +sometimes I saw the face of my lost father; sometimes I heard his very +voice, as I had seen and heard him in my early childhood, when he would +let me rest for hours beside him as he mused or studied, happy to be so +quietly near him, for I loved him, oh, so dearly! and I remember him so +distinctly, though I was only in my sixth year when he died. Much more +recently--indeed, within the last few months--the images of things to come +are reflected on the space that I gaze into as clearly as in a glass. +Thus, for weeks before I came hither, or knew that such a place existed, I +saw distinctly the old House, yon trees, this sward, this moss-grown +Gothic fount; and, with the sight, an impression was conveyed to me that +in the scene before me my old childlike life would pass into some solemn +change. So that when I came here, and recognized the picture in my +vision, I took an affection for the spot,--an affection not without awe, a +powerful, perplexing interest, as one who feels under the influence of a +fate of which a prophetic glimpse has been vouchsafed. And in that +evening, when you first saw me, seated here--" + +"Yes, Lilian, on that evening--" + +"I saw you also, but in my vision--yonder, far in the deeps of +space,--and--and my heart was stirred as it had never been before; and +near where your image grew out from the cloud I saw my father's face, and +I heard his voice, not in my ear, but as in my heart, whispering--" + +"Yes, Lilian--whispering--what?" + +"These words,--only these,--'Ye will need one another.' But then, +suddenly, between my upward eyes and the two forms they had beheld, there +rose from the earth, obscuring the skies, a vague, dusky vapour, undulous, +and coiling like a vast serpent,--nothing, indeed, of its shape and +figure definite, but of its face one abrupt glare; a flash from two dread +luminous eyes, and a young head, like the Medusa's, changing, more rapidly +than I could have drawn breath, into a grinning skull. Then my terror +made me bow my head, and when I raised it again, all that I had seen was +vanished. But the terror still remained, even when I felt my mother's arm +round me and heard her voice. And then, when I entered the house, and sat +down again alone, the recollection of what I had seen--those eyes, that +face, that skull--grew on me stronger and stronger till I fainted, and +remember no more, until my eyes, opening, saw you by my side, and in my +wonder there was not terror. No, a sense of joy, protection, hope, yet +still shadowed by a kind of fear or awe, in recognizing the countenance +which had gleamed on me from the skies before the dark vapour had risen, +and while my father's voice had murmured, 'Ye will need one another.' And +now--and now--will you love me less that you know a secret in my being +which I have told to no other,--cannot construe to myself? Only--only, +at least, do not mock me; do not disbelieve me! Nay, turn from me no +longer now: now I ask to meet your eyes. Now, before our hands can join +again, tell me that you do not despise me as untruthful, do not pity me as +insane." + +"Hush, hush!" I said, drawing her to my breast. "Of all you tell me we +will talk hereafter. The scales of our science have no weights fine +enough for the gossamer threads of a maiden's pure fancies. Enough for +me--for us both--if out from all such illusions start one truth, told to +you, lovely child, from the heavens; told to me, ruder man, on the earth; +repeated by each pulse of this heart that woos you to hear and to +trust,--now and henceforth through life unto death, 'Each has need of the +other,'--I of you, I of you! my Lilian! my Lilian!" + + + + +CHAPTER XVIII. + +In spite of the previous assurance of Mrs. Poyntz, it was not without an +uneasy apprehension that I approached the cedar-tree, under which Mrs. +Ashleigh still sat, her friend beside her. I looked on the fair creature +whose arm was linked in mine. So young, so singularly lovely, and with +all the gifts of birth and fortune which bend avarice and ambition the +more submissively to youth and beauty, I felt as if I had wronged what a +parent might justly deem her natural lot. + +"Oh, if your mother should disapprove!" said I, falteringly. Lilian +leaned on my arm less lightly. "If I had thought so," she said with her +soft blush, "should I be thus by your side?" + +So we passed under the boughs of the dark tree, and Lilian left me and +kissed Mrs. Ashleigh's cheek; then, seating herself on the turf, laid her +head on her mother's lap. I looked on the Queen of the Hill, whose keen +eye shot over me. I thought there was a momentary expression of pain or +displeasure on her countenance; but it passed. Still there seemed to me +something of irony, as well as of triumph or congratulation, in the +half-smile with which she quitted her seat, and in the tone with which she +whispered, as she glided by me to the open sward, "So, then, it is +settled." + +She walked lightly and quickly down the lawn. When she was out of sight I +breathed more freely. I took the seat which she had left, by Mrs. +Ashleigh's side, and said, "A little while ago I spoke of myself as a man +without kindred, without home, and now I come to you and ask for both." + +Mrs. Ashleigh looked at me benignly, then raised her daughter's face from +her lap, and whispered, "Lilian;" and Lilian's lips moved, but I did not +hear her answer. Her mother did. She took Lilian's hand, simply placed +it in mine, and said, "As she chooses, I choose; whom she loves, I love." + + + + +CHAPTER XIX. + +From that evening till the day Mrs. Ashleigh and Lilian went on the +dreaded visit, I was always at their house, when my avocations allowed me +to steal to it; and during those few days, the happiest I had ever known, +it seemed to me that years could not have more deepened my intimacy with +Lilian's exquisite nature, made me more reverential of its purity, or more +enamoured of its sweetness. I could detect in her but one fault, and I +rebuked myself for believing that it was a fault. We see many who neglect +the minor duties of life, who lack watchful forethought and considerate +care for others, and we recognize the cause of this failing in levity or +egotism. Certainly, neither of those tendencies of character could be +ascribed to Lilian. Yet still in daily trifles there was something of +that neglect, some lack of that care and forethought. She loved her +mother with fondness and devotion, yet it never occurred to her to aid in +those petty household cares in which her mother centred so much of +habitual interest. She was full of tenderness and pity to all want and +suffering, yet many a young lady on the Hill was more actively +beneficent,--visiting the poor in their sickness, or instructing their +children in the Infant Schools. I was persuaded that her love for me was +deep and truthful; it was clearly void of all ambition; doubtless she +would have borne, unflinching and contented, whatever the world considers +to be a sacrifice and privation,--yet I should never have expected her to +take her share in the troubles of ordinary life. I could never have +applied to her the homely but significant name of helpmate. I reproach +myself while I write for noticing such defect--if defect it were--in what +may be called the practical routine of our positive, trivial, human +existence. No doubt it was this that had caused Mrs. Poyntz's harsh +judgment against the wisdom of my choice. But such chiller shade upon +Lilian's charming nature was reflected from no inert, unamiable self-love. +It was but the consequence of that self-absorption which the habit of +revery had fostered. I cautiously abstained from all allusion to those +visionary deceptions, which she had confided to me as the truthful +impressions of spirit, if not of sense. To me any approach to what I +termed "superstition" was displeasing; any indulgence of fantasies not +within the measured and beaten track of healthful imagination more than +displeased me in her,--it alarmed. I would not by a word encourage her in +persuasions which I felt it would be at present premature to reason +against, and cruel indeed to ridicule. I was convinced that of +themselves these mists round her native intelligence, engendered by a +solitary and musing childhood, would subside in the fuller daylight of +wedded life. She seemed pained when she saw how resolutely I shunned a +subject dear to her thoughts. She made one or two timid attempts to renew +it, but my grave looks sufficed to check her. Once or twice indeed, on +such occasions, she would turn away and leave me, but she soon came back; +that gentle heart could not bear one unkindlier shade between itself and +what it loved. It was agreed that our engagement should be, for the +present, confided only to Mrs. Poyntz. When Mrs. Ashleigh and Lilian +returned, which would be in a few weeks at furthest, it should be +proclaimed; and our marriage could take place in the autumn, when I should +be most free for a brief holiday from professional toils. + +So we parted-as lovers part. I felt none of those jealous fears which, +before we were affianced, had made me tremble at the thought of +separation, and had conjured up irresistible rivals. But it was with a +settled, heavy gloom that I saw her depart. From earth was gone a glory; +from life a blessing. + + + + +CHAPTER XX. + +During the busy years of my professional career, I had snatched leisure +for some professional treatises, which had made more or less sensation, +and one of them, entitled "The Vital Principle; its Waste and Supply," had +gained a wide circulation among the general public. This last treatise +contained the results of certain experiments, then new in chemistry, which +were adduced in support of a theory I entertained as to the +re-invigoration of the human system by principles similar to those which +Liebig has applied to the replenishment of an exhausted soil,--namely, the +giving back to the frame those essentials to its nutrition, which it has +lost by the action or accident of time; or supplying that special pabulum +or energy in which the individual organism is constitutionally deficient; +and neutralizing or counterbalancing that in which it super-abounds,--a +theory upon which some eminent physicians have more recently improved with +signal success. But on these essays, slight and suggestive, rather than +dogmatic, I set no value. I had been for the last two years engaged on a +work of much wider range, endeared to me by a far bolder ambition,--a work +upon which I fondly hoped to found an enduring reputation as a severe and +original physiologist. It was an Inquiry into Organic Life, similar in +comprehensiveness of survey to that by which the illustrious Muller, of +Berlin, has enriched the science of our age; however inferior, alas! to +that august combination of thought and learning in the judgment which +checks presumption, and the genius which adorns speculation. But at that +day I was carried away by the ardour of composition, and I admired my +performance because I loved my labour. This work had been entirely laid +aside for the last agitated month; now that Lilian was gone, I resumed it +earnestly, as the sole occupation that had power and charm enough to rouse +me from the aching sense of void and loss. + +The very night of the day she went, I reopened my manuscript. I had left +off at the commencement of a chapter Upon Knowledge as derived from our +Senses. As my convictions on this head were founded on the well-known +arguments of Locke and Condillac against innate ideas, and on the +reasonings by which Hume has resolved the combination of sensations into a +general idea to an impulse arising merely out of habit, so I set myself to +oppose, as a dangerous concession to the sentimentalities or mysticism of +a pseudo-philosophy, the doctrine favoured by most of our recent +physiologists, and of which some of the most eminent of German +metaphysicians have accepted the substance, though refining into a +subtlety its positive form,--I mean the doctrine which Muller himself has +expressed in these words:-- + + "That innate ideas may exist cannot in the slightest degree be denied: + it is, indeed, a fact. All the ideas of animals, which are induced by + instinct, are innate and immediate: something presented to the mind, a + desire to attain which is at the same time given. The new-born lamb + and foal have such innate ideas, which lead them to follow their + mother and suck the teats. Is it not in some measure the same with + the intellectual ideas of man?"[1] + +To this question I answered with an indignant "No!" A "Yes" would have +shaken my creed of materialism to the dust. I wrote on rapidly, warmly. +I defined the properties and meted the limits of natural laws, which I +would not admit that a Deity himself could alter. I clamped and soldered +dogma to dogma in the links of my tinkered logic, till out from my page, +to my own complacent eye, grew Intellectual Man, as the pure formation of +his material senses; mind, or what is called soul, born from and nurtured +by them alone; through them to act, and to perish with the machine they +moved. Strange, that at the very time my love for Lilian might have +taught me that there are mysteries in the core of the feelings which my +analysis of ideas could not solve, I should so stubbornly have opposed as +unreal all that could be referred to the spiritual! Strange, that at the +very time when the thought that I might lose from this life the being I +had known scarce a month had just before so appalled me, I should thus +complacently sit down to prove that, according to the laws of the nature +which my passion obeyed, I must lose for eternity the blessing I now hoped +I had won to my life! But how distinctly dissimilar is man in his conduct +from man in his systems! See the poet reclined under forest boughs, +conning odes to his mistress; follow him out into the world; no mistress +ever lived for him there![2] See the hard man of science, so austere in +his passionless problems; follow him now where the brain rests from its +toil, where the heart finds its Sabbath--what child is so tender, so +yielding, and soft? + +But I had proved to my own satisfaction that poet and sage are dust, and +no more, when the pulse ceases to beat. And on that consolatory +conclusion my pen stopped. + +Suddenly, beside me I distinctly heard a sigh,--a compassionate, mournful +sigh. The sound was unmistakable. I started from my seat, looked round, +amazed to discover no one,--no living thing! The windows were closed, the +night was still. That sigh was not the wail of the wind. But there, in +the darker angle of the room, what was that? A silvery whiteness, vaguely +shaped as a human form, receding, fading, gone! Why, I know not--for no +face was visible, no form, if form it were, more distinct than the +colourless outline,--why, I know not, but I cried aloud, "Lilian! +Lilian!" My voice came strangely back to my own ear; I paused, then +smiled and blushed at my folly. "So I, too, have learned what is +superstition," I muttered to myself. "And here is an anecdote at my own +expense (as Muller frankly tells us anecdotes of the illusions which +would haunt his eyes, shut or open),--an anecdote I may quote when I come +to my chapter on the Cheats of the Senses and Spectral Phantasms." I +went on with my book, and wrote till the lights waned in the gray of the +dawn. And I said then, in the triumph of my pride, as I laid myself down +to rest, "I have written that which allots with precision man's place in +the region of nature; written that which will found a school, form +disciples; and race after race of those who cultivate truth through pure +reason shall accept my bases if they enlarge my building." And again I +heard the sigh, but this time it caused no surprise. "Certainly," I +murmured, "a very strange thing is the nervous system!" So I turned on +my pillow, and, wearied out, fell asleep. + +[1] Muller's "Elements of Physiology," vol. ii. p. 134. Translated by Dr. +Baley. + +[2] Cowley, who wrote so elaborate a series of amatory poems, is said +"never to have been in love but once, and then he never had resolution to +tell his passion."--Johnson's "Lives of the Poets:" COWLEY. + + + + +CHAPTER XXI. + +The next day, the last of the visiting patients to whom my forenoons were +devoted had just quitted me, when I was summoned in haste to attend the +steward of a Sir Philip Derval not residing at his family seat, which was +about five miles from L----. It was rarely indeed that persons so far +from the town, when of no higher rank than this applicant, asked my +services. + +But it was my principle to go wherever I was summoned; my profession was +not gain, it was healing, to which gain was the incident, not the +essential. This case the messenger reported as urgent. I went on +horseback, and rode fast; but swiftly as I cantered through the village +that skirted the approach to Sir Philip Derval's park, the evident care +bestowed on the accommodation of the cottagers forcibly struck me. I felt +that I was on the lands of a rich, intelligent, and beneficent proprietor. +Entering the park, and passing before the manor-house, the contrast +between the neglect and the decay of the absentee's stately Hall and the +smiling homes of his villagers was disconsolately mournful. + +An imposing pile, built apparently by Vanbrugh, with decorated pilasters, +pompous portico, and grand perron (or double flight of stairs to the +entrance), enriched with urns and statues, but discoloured, mildewed, +chipped, half-hidden with unpruned creepers and ivy. Most of the windows +were closed with shutters, decaying for want of paint; in some of the +casements the panes were broken; the peacock perched on the shattered +balustrade, that fenced a garden overgrown with weeds. The sun glared +hotly on the place, and made its ruinous condition still more painfully +apparent. I was glad when a winding in the park-road shut the house from +my sight. Suddenly I emerged through a copse of ancient yew-trees, and +before me there gleamed, in abrupt whiteness, a building evidently +designed for the family mausoleum, classical in its outline, with the +blind iron door niched into stone walls of massive thickness, and +surrounded by a funereal garden of roses and evergreens, fenced with an +iron rail, party-gilt. + +The suddenness with which this House of the Dead came upon me heightened +almost into pain, if not into awe, the dismal impression which the aspect +of the deserted home in its neighbourhood had made. I spurred my horse, +and soon arrived at the door of my patient, who lived in a fair brick +house at the other extremity of the park. + +I found my patient, a man somewhat advanced in years, but of a robust +conformation, in bed: he had been seized with a fit, which was supposed to +be apoplectic, a few hours before; but was already sensible, and out of +immediate danger. After I had prescribed a few simple remedies, I took +aside the patient's wife, and went with her to the parlour below stairs, +to make some inquiry about her husband's ordinary regimen and habits of +life. These seemed sufficiently regular; I could discover no apparent +cause for the attack, which presented symptoms not familiar to my +experience. "Has your husband ever had such fits before?" + +"Never!" + +"Had he experienced any sudden emotion? Had he heard any unexpected news; +or had anything happened to put him out?" + +The woman looked much disturbed at these inquiries. I pressed them more +urgently. At last she burst into tears, and clasping my hand, said, "Oh, +doctor, I ought to tell you--I sent for you on purpose--yet I fear you +will not believe me: my good man has seen a ghost!" + +"A ghost!" said I, repressing a smile. "Well, tell me all, that I may +prevent the ghost coming again." + +The woman's story was prolix. Its substance was this Her husband, +habitually an early riser, had left his bed that morning still earlier +than usual, to give directions about some cattle that were to be sent for +sale to a neighbouring fair. An hour afterwards he had been found by a +shepherd, near the mausoleum, apparently lifeless. On being removed to +his own house, he had recovered speech, and bidding all except his wife +leave the room, he then told her that on walking across the park towards +the cattle-sheds, he had seen what appeared to him at first a pale light +by the iron door of the mausoleum. On approaching nearer, this light +changed into the distinct and visible form of his master, Sir Philip +Derval, who was then abroad,--supposed to be in the East, where he had +resided for many years. The impression on the steward's mind was so +strong, that he called out, "Oh, Sir Philip!" when looking still more +intently, he perceived that the face was that of a corpse. As he +continued to gaze, the apparition seemed gradually to recede, as if +vanishing into the sepulchre itself. He knew no more; he became +unconscious. It was the excess of the poor woman's alarm, on hearing +this strange tale, that made her resolve to send for me instead of the +parish apothecary. She fancied so astounding a cause for her husband's +seizure could only be properly dealt with by some medical man reputed to +have more than ordinary learning; and the steward himself objected to the +apothecary in the immediate neighbourhood, as more likely to annoy him by +gossip than a physician from a comparative distance. + +I took care not to lose the confidence of the good wife by parading too +quickly my disbelief in the phantom her husband declared that he ad seen; +but as the story itself seemed at once to decide the nature of the fit to +be epileptic, I began to tell her of similar delusions which, in my +experience, had occurred to those subjected to epilepsy, and finally +soothed her into the conviction that the apparition was clearly reducible +to natural causes. Afterwards, I led her on to talk about Sir Philip +Derval, less from any curiosity I felt about the absent proprietor than +from a desire to re-familiarize her own mind to his image as a living man. +The steward had been in the service of Sir Philip's father, and had known +Sir Philip himself from a child. He was warmly attached to his master, +whom the old woman described as a man of rare benevolence and great +eccentricity, which last she imputed to his studious habits. He had +succeeded to the title and estates as a minor. For the first few years +after attaining his majority, be had mixed much in the world. When at +Derval Court his house had been filled with gay companions, and was the +scene of lavish hospitality; but the estate was not in proportion to the +grandeur of the mansion, still less to the expenditure of the owner. He +had become greatly embarrassed; and some love disappointment (so it was +rumoured) occurring simultaneously with his pecuniary difficulties, he had +suddenly changed his way of life, shut himself up from his old friends, +lived in seclusion, taking to books and scientific pursuits, and as the +old woman said vaguely and expressively, "to odd ways." He had +gradually by an economy that, towards himself, was penurious, but which +did not preclude much judicious generosity to others, cleared off his +debts; and, once more rich, he had suddenly quitted the country, and +taken to a life of travel. He was now about forty-eight years old, and +had been eighteen years abroad. He wrote frequently to his steward, +giving him minute and thoughtful instructions in regard to the employment, +comforts, and homes of the peasantry, but peremptorily ordering him to +spend no money on the grounds and mansion, stating as a reason why the +latter might be allowed to fall into decay, his intention to pull it down +whenever he returned to England. + +I stayed some time longer than my engagements well warranted at my +patient's house, not leaving till the sufferer, after a quiet sleep, had +removed from his bed to his armchair, taken food, and seemed perfectly +recovered from his attack. + +Riding homeward, I mused on the difference that education makes, even +pathologically, between man and man. Here was a brawny inhabitant of +rural fields, leading the healthiest of lives, not conscious of the +faculty we call imagination, stricken down almost to Death's door by his +fright at an optical illusion, explicable, if examined, by the same simple +causes which had impressed me the night before with a moment's belief in a +sound and a spectre,--me who, thanks to sublime education, went so quietly +to sleep a few minutes after, convinced hat no phantom, the ghostliest +that ear ever heard or eye ever saw, can be anything else but a nervous +phenomenon. + + + + +CHAPTER XXII. + +That evening I went to Mrs. Poyntz's; it was one of her ordinary +"reception nights," and I felt that she would naturally expect my +attendance as "a proper attention." + +I joined a group engaged in general conversation, of which Mrs. Poyntz +herself made the centre, knitting as usual,--rapidly while she talked, +slowly when she listened. + +Without mentioning the visit I had paid that morning, I turned the +conversation on the different country places in the neighbourhood, and +then incidentally asked, "What sort of a man is Sir Philip Derval? Is it +not strange that he should suffer so fine a place to fall into decay?" +The answers I received added little to the information I had already +obtained. Mrs. Poyntz knew nothing of Sir Philip Derval, except as a man +of large estates, whose rental had been greatly increased by a rise in the +value of property he possessed in the town of L----, and which lay +contiguous to that of her husband. Two or three of the older inhabitants +of the Hill had remembered Sir Philip in his early days, when he was gay, +high-spirited, hospitable, lavish. One observed that the only person in +L---- whom he had admitted to his subsequent seclusion was Dr. Lloyd, who +was then without practice, and whom he had employed as an assistant in +certain chemical experiments. + +Here a gentleman struck into the conversation. He was a stranger to me +and to L----, a visitor to one of the dwellers on the Hill, who had asked +leave to present him to its queen as a great traveller and an accomplished +antiquary. + + Said this gentleman: "Sir Philip Derval? I know him. I met him in the +East. He was then still, I believe, very fond of chemical science; a +clever, odd, philanthropical man; had studied medicine, or at least +practised it; was said to have made many marvellous cures. I became +acquainted with him in Aleppo. He had come to that town, not much +frequented by English travellers, in order to inquire into the murder of +two men, of whom one was his friend and the other his countryman." + +"This is interesting," said Mrs. Poyntz, dryly. "We who live on this +innocent Hill all love stories of crime; murder is the pleasantest subject +you could have hit on. Pray give us the details." + +"So encouraged," said the traveller, good-humouredly, "I will not hesitate +to communicate the little I know. In Aleppo there had lived for some +years a man who was held by the natives in great reverence. He had the +reputation of extraordinary wisdom, but was difficult of access; the +lively imagination of the Orientals invested his character with the +fascinations of fable,--in short, Haroun of Aleppo was popularly +considered a magician. Wild stories were told of his powers, of his +preternatural age, of his hoarded treasures. Apart from such disputable +titles to homage, there seemed no question, from all I heard, that his +learning was considerable, his charities extensive, his manner of life +irreproachably ascetic. He appears to have resembled those Arabian sages +of the Gothic age to whom modern science is largely indebted,--a mystic +enthusiast, but an earnest scholar. A wealthy and singular Englishman, +long resident in another part of the East, afflicted by some languishing +disease, took a journey to Aleppo to consult this sage, who, among his +other acquirements, was held to have discovered rare secrets in +medicine,--his countrymen said in 'charms.' One morning, not long after +the Englishman's arrival, Haroun was found dead in his bed, apparently +strangled, and the Englishman, who lodged in another part of the town, had +disappeared; but some of his clothes, and a crutch on which he habitually +supported himself, were found a few miles distant from Aleppo, near the +roadside. There appeared no doubt that he, too, had been murdered, but +his corpse could not be discovered. Sir Philip Derval had been a loving +disciple of this Sage of Aleppo, to whom he assured me he owed not only +that knowledge of medicine which, by report, Sir Philip possessed, but the +insight into various truths of nature, on the promulgation of which, it +was evident, Sir Philip cherished the ambition to found a philosophical +celebrity for himself." + +"Of what description were those truths of nature?" I asked, somewhat +sarcastically. + +"Sir, I am unable to tell you, for Sir Philip did not inform me, nor did I +much care to ask; for what may be revered as truths in Asia are usually +despised as dreams in Europe. To return to my story: Sir Philip had been +in Aleppo a little time before the murder; had left the Englishman under +the care of Haroun. He returned to Aleppo on hearing the tragic events I +have related, and was busy in collecting such evidence as could be +gleaned, and instituting inquiries after our missing countryman at the +time I myself chanced to arrive in the city. I assisted in his +researches, but without avail. The assassins remained undiscovered. I do +not myself doubt that they were mere vulgar robbers. Sir Philip had a +darker suspicion of which he made no secret to me; but as I confess that I +thought the suspicion groundless, you will pardon me if I do not repeat +it. Whether since I left the East the Englishman's remains have been +discovered, I know not. Very probably; for I understand that his heirs +have got hold of what fortune he left,--less than was generally supposed. +But it was reported that he had buried great treasures, a rumour, however +absurd, not altogether inconsistent with his character." + +"What was his character?" asked Mrs. Poyntz. + +"One of evil and sinister repute. He was regarded with terror by the +attendants who had accompanied him to Aleppo. But he had lived in a very +remote part of the East, little known to Europeans, and, from all I could +learn, had there established an extraordinary power, strengthened by +superstitious awe. He was said to have studied deeply that knowledge +which the philosophers of old called 'occult,' not, like the Sage of +Aleppo, for benevolent, but for malignant ends. He was accused of +conferring with evil spirits, and filling his barbaric court (for he lived +in a kind of savage royalty) with charmers and sorcerers. I suspect, +after all, that he was only, like myself, an ardent antiquary, and +cunningly made use of the fear he inspired in order to secure his +authority, and prosecute in safety researches into ancient sepulchres or +temples. His great passion was, indeed, in excavating such remains, in +his neighbourhood; with what result I know not, never having penetrated +so far into regions infested by robbers and pestiferous with malaria. He +wore the Eastern dress, and always carried jewels about him. I came to +the conclusion that for the sake of these jewels he was murdered, perhaps +by some of his own servants (and, indeed, two at least of his suite were +missing), who then at once buried his body, and kept their own secret. He +was old, very infirm; could never have got far from the town without +assistance." + +"You have not yet told us his name," said Mrs. Poyntz. + +"His name was Grayle." + +"Grayle!" exclaimed Mrs. Poyntz, dropping her work. "Louis Grayle?" + +"Yes; Louis Grayle. You could not have known him?" + +"Known him! No; but I have often heard my father speak of him. Such, +then, was the tragic end of that strong dark creature, for whom, as a +young girl in the nursery, I used to feel a kind of fearful admiring +interest?" + +"It is your turn to narrate now," said the traveller. + +And we all drew closer round our hostess, who remained silent some +moments, her brow thoughtful, her work suspended. + +"Well," said she at last, looking round us with a lofty air, which seemed +half defying, "force and courage are always fascinating, even when they +are quite in the wrong. I go with the world, because the world goes with +me; if it did not--" Here she stopped for a moment, clenched the firm +white hand, and then scornfully waved it, left the sentence unfinished, +and broke into another. + +"Going with the world, of course we must march over those who stand +against it. But when one man stands single-handed against our march, we +do not despise him; it is enough to crush. I am very glad I did not see +Louis Grayle when I was a girl of sixteen." Again she paused a moment, +and resumed: "Louis Grayle was the only son of a usurer, infamous for the +rapacity with which he had acquired enormous wealth. Old Grayle desired +to rear his heir as a gentleman; sent him to Eton. Boys are always +aristocratic; his birth was soon thrown in his teeth; he was fierce; he +struck boys bigger than himself,--fought till he was half killed. My +father was at school with him; described him as a tiger-whelp. One day +he--still a fag--struck a sixth-form boy. Sixth-form boys do not fight +fags; they punish them. Louis Grayle was ordered to hold out his hand to +the cane; he received the blow, drew forth his schoolboy knife, and +stabbed the punisher. After that, he left Eton. I don't think he was +publicly expelled--too mere a child for that honour--but he was taken or +sent away; educated with great care under the first masters at home. When +he was of age to enter the University, old Grayle was dead. Louis was +sent by his guardians to Cambridge, with acquirements far exceeding the +average of young men, and with unlimited command of money. My father was +at the same college, and described him again,--haughty, quarrelsome, +reckless, handsome, aspiring, brave. Does that kind of creature interest +you, my dears?" (appealing to the ladies). + +"La!" said Miss Brabazon; "a horrid usurer's son!" + +"Ay, true; the vulgar proverb says it is good to be born with a silver +spoon in one's mouth: so it is when one has one's own family crest on it; +ut when it is a spoon on which people recognize their family crest, and +cry out, 'Stolen from our plate chest,' it is a heritage that outlaws a +babe in his cradle. However, young men at college who want money are less +scrupulous about descent than boys at Eton are. Louis Grayle found, while +at college, plenty of wellborn acquaintances willing to recover from him +some of the plunder his father had extorted from theirs. He was too wild +to distinguish himself by academical honours, but my father said that the +tutors of the college declared there were not six undergraduates in the +University who knew as much hard and dry science as wild Louis Grayle. He +went into the world, no doubt, hoping to shine; but his father's name was +too notorious to admit the son into good society. The Polite World, it +is true, does not examine a scutcheon with the nice eye of a herald, nor +look upon riches with the stately contempt of a stoic; still the Polite +World has its family pride and its moral sentiment. It does not like to +be cheated,--I mean, in money matters; and when the son of a man who has +emptied its purse and foreclosed on its acres rides by its club-windows, +hand on haunch, and head in the air, no lion has a scowl more awful, no +hyena a laugh more dread, than that same easy, good-tempered, tolerant, +polite, well-bred World which is so pleasant an acquaintance, so languid +a friend, and--so remorseless an--enemy. In short, Louis Grayle claimed +the right to be courted,--he was shunned; to be admired,--he was loathed. +Even his old college acquaintances were shamed out of knowing him. +Perhaps he could have lived through all this had he sought to glide +quietly into position; but he wanted the tact of the well-bred, and +strove to storm his way, not to steal it. Reduced for companions to +needy parasites, he braved and he shocked all decorous opinion by that +ostentation of excess, which made Richelieus and Lauzuns the rage. But +then Richelieus and Lauzuns were dukes! He now very naturally took the +Polite World into hate,--gave it scorn for scorn. He would ally himself +with Democracy; his wealth could not get him into a club, but it would buy +him into parliament; he could not be a Lauzun, nor, perhaps, a Mirabeau, +but he might be a Danton. He had plenty of knowledge and audacity, and +with knowledge and audacity a good hater is sure to be eloquent. +Possibly, then, this poor Louis Grayle might have made a great figure, +left his mark on his age and his name in history; but in contesting the +borough, which he was sure to carry, he had to face an opponent in a real +fine gentleman whom his father had ruined, cool and highbred, with a +tongue like a rapier, a sneer like an adder. A quarrel of course; Louis +Grayle sent a challenge. The fine gentleman, known to be no coward (fine +gentlemen never are), was at first disposed to refuse with contempt. But +Grayle had made himself the idol of the mob; and at a word from Grayle, +the fine gentleman might have been ducked at a pump, or tossed in a +blanket,--that would have made him ridiculous; to be shot at is a trifle, +to be laughed at is serious. He therefore condescended to accept the +challenge, and my father was his second. + +"It was settled, of course, according to English custom, that both +combatants should fire at the same time, and by signal. The antagonist +fired at the right moment; his ball grazed Louis Grayle's temple. Louis +Grayle had not fired. He now seemed to the seconds to take slow and +deliberate aim. They called out to him not to fire; they were rushing to +prevent him, when the trigger was pulled, and his opponent fell dead on +the field. The fight was, therefore, considered unfair; Louis Grayle was +tried for his life: he did not stand the trial in person.[1] He escaped +to the Continent; hurried on to some distant uncivilized lands; could not +be traced; reappeared in England no more. The lawyer who conducted his +defence pleaded skilfully. He argued that the delay in firing was not +intentional, therefore not criminal,--the effect of the stun which the +wound in the temple had occasioned. The judge was a gentleman, and summed +up the evidence so as to direct the jury to a verdict against the low +wretch who had murdered a gentleman; but the jurors were not gentlemen, +and Grayle's advocate had of course excited their sympathy for a son of +the people, whom a gentleman had wantonly insulted. The verdict was +manslaughter; but the sentence emphatically marked the aggravated nature +of the homicide,--three years' imprisonment. Grayle eluded the prison, +but he was a man disgraced and an exile,--his ambition blasted, his career +an outlaw's, and his age not yet twenty-three. My father said that he was +supposed to have changed his name; none knew what had become of him. And +so this creature, brilliant and daring, whom if born under better auspices +we might now be all fawning on, cringing to,--after living to old age, no +one knows how,--dies murdered at Aleppo, no one, you say, knows by whom." + +"I saw some account of his death in the papers about three years ago," +said one of the party; "but the name was misspelled, and I had no idea +that it was the same man who had fought the duel which Mrs. Colonel Poyntz +has so graphically described. I have a very vague recollection of the +trial; it took place when I was a boy, more than forty years since. The +affair made a stir at the time, but was soon forgotten." + +"Soon forgotten," said Mrs. Poyntz; "ay, what is not? Leave your place in +the world for ten minutes, and when you come back somebody else has taken +it; but when you leave the world for good, who remembers that you had ever +a place even in the parish register?" + +"Nevertheless," said I, "a great poet has said, finely and truly, + + "'The sun of Homer shines upon us still.'" + +"But it does not shine upon Homer; and learned folks tell me that we know +no more who and what Homer was, if there was ever a single Homer at all, +or rather, a whole herd of Homers, than we know about the man in the +moon,--if there be one man there, or millions of men. Now, my dear Miss +Brabazon, it will be very kind in you to divert our thoughts into channels +less gloomy. Some pretty French air--Dr. Fenwick, I have something to +say to you." She drew me towards the window. "So Annie Ashleigh writes +me word that I am not to mention your engagement. Do you think it quite +prudent to keep it a secret?" + +"I do not see how prudence is concerned in keeping it secret one way or +the other,--it is a mere matter of feeling. Most people wish to abridge, +as far as they can, the time in which their private arrangements are the +topic of public gossip." + +"Public gossip is sometimes the best security for the due completion of +private arrangements. As long as a girl is not known to be engaged, her +betrothed must be prepared for rivals. Announce the engagement, and +rivals are warned off." + +"I fear no rivals." + +"Do you not? Bold man! I suppose you will write to Lilian?" + +"Certainly." + +"Do so, and constantly. By-the-way, Mrs. Ashleigh, before she went, asked +me to send her back Lady Haughton's letter of invitation. What for,--to +show to you?" + +"Very likely. Have you the letter still? May I see it?" + +"Not just at present. When Lilian or Mrs. Ashleigh writes to you, come +and tell me how they like their visit, and what other guests form the +party." + +Therewith she turned away and conversed apart with the traveller. + +Her words disquieted me, and I felt that they were meant to do so, +wherefore I could not guess. But there is no language on earth which has +more words with a double meaning than that spoken by the Clever Woman, who +is never so guarded as when she appears to be frank. + +As I walked home thoughtfully, I was accosted by a young man, the son of +one of the wealthiest merchants in the town. I had attended him with +success some months before, in a rheumatic fever: he and his family were +much attached to me. + +"Ah, my dear Fenwick, I am so glad to see you; I owe you an obligation of +which you are not aware,--an exceedingly pleasant travelling-companion. I +came with him to-day from London, where I have been sight-seeing and +holidaymaking for the last fortnight." + +"I suppose you mean that you kindly bring me a patient?" + +"No, only an admirer. I was staying at Fenton's Hotel. It so happened +one day that I had left in the coffee-room your last work on the Vital +Principle, which, by the by, the bookseller assures me is selling +immensely among readers as non-professional as myself. Coming into the +coffee-room again, I found a gentleman reading the book. I claimed it +politely; he as politely tendered his excuse for taking it. We made +acquaintance on the spot. The next day we were intimate. He expressed +great interest and curiosity about your theory and your experiments. I +told him I knew you. You may guess if I described you as less clever in +your practice than you are in your writings; and, in short, he came with +me to L----, partly to see our flourishing town, principally on my promise +to introduce him to you. My mother, you know, has what she calls a +dejeuner tomorrow,--dejeuner and dance. You will be there?" + +"Thank you for reminding me of her invitation. I will avail myself of it +if I can. Your new friend will be present? Who and what is he,--a +medical student?" + +"No, a mere gentleman at ease, but seems to have a good deal of general +information. Very young, apparently very rich, wonderfully good-looking. +I am sure you will like him; everybody must." + +"It is quite enough to prepare me to like him that he is a friend of +yours." And so we shook hands and parted. + +[1] Mrs. Poyntz here makes a mistake in law which, though very evident, +her listeners do not seem to have noticed. Her mistake will be referred +to later. + + + + +CHAPTER XXIII. + +It was late in the afternoon of the following day before I was able to +join the party assembled at the merchant's house; it was a villa about two +miles out of the town, pleasantly situated amidst flower-gardens +celebrated in the neighbourhood for their beauty. The breakfast had been +long over; the company was scattered over the lawn,--some formed into a +dance on the smooth lawn; some seated under shady awnings; others gliding +amidst parterres, in which all the glow of colour took a glory yet more +vivid under the flush of a brilliant sunshine; and the ripple of a soft +western breeze. Music, loud and lively, mingled with the laughter of +happy children, who formed much the larger number of the party. + +Standing at the entrance of an arched trellis, that led from the hardier +flowers of the lawn to a rare collection of tropical plants under a lofty +glass dome (connecting, as it were, the familiar vegetation of the North +with that of the remotest East), was a form that instantaneously caught +and fixed my gaze. The entrance of the arcade was covered with parasite +creepers, in prodigal luxuriance, of variegated gorgeous tints,--scarlet, +golden, purple; and the form, an idealized picture of man's youth fresh +from the hand of Nature, stood literally in a frame of blooms. + +Never have I seen human face so radiant as that young man's. There was in +the aspect an indescribable something that literally dazzled. As one +continued to gaze, it was with surprise; one was forced to acknowledge +that in the features themselves there was no faultless regularity; nor was +the young man's stature imposing, about the middle height. But the effect +of the whole was not less transcendent. Large eyes, unspeakably lustrous; +a most harmonious colouring; an expression of contagious animation and +joyousness; and the form itself so critically fine, that the welded +strength of its sinews was best shown in the lightness and grace of its +movements. + +He was resting one hand carelessly on the golden locks of a child that had +nestled itself against his knees, looking up to his face in that silent +loving wonder with which children regard something too strangely beautiful +for noisy admiration; he himself was conversing with the host, an old +gray-haired, gouty man, propped on his crutched stick, and listening with +a look of mournful envy. To the wealth of the old man all the flowers in +that garden owed their renewed delight in the summer air and sun. Oh, +that his wealth could renew to himself one hour of the youth whose +incarnation stood beside him, Lord, indeed, of Creation; its splendour +woven into his crown of beauty, its enjoyments subject to his sceptre of +hope and gladness. + +I was startled by the hearty voice of the merchant's son. "Ah, my dear +Fenwick, I was afraid you would not come,--you are late. There is the new +friend of whom I spoke to you last night; let me now make you acquainted +with him." He drew my arm in his, and led me up to the young man, where +he stood under the arching flowers, and whom he then introduced to me by +the name of Margrave. + +Nothing could be more frankly cordial than Mr. Margrave's manner. In a +few minutes I found myself conversing with him familiarly, as if we had +been reared in the same home, and sported together in the same playground. +His vein of talk was peculiar, off-hand, careless, shifting from topic to +topic with a bright rapidity. + +He said that he liked the place; proposed to stay in it some weeks; asked +my address, which I gave to him; promised to call soon at an early hour, +while my time was yet free from professional visits. I endeavoured, when +I went away, to analyze to myself the fascination which this young +stranger so notably exercised over all who approached him; and it seemed +to me, ever seeking to find material causes for all moral effects, that it +rose from the contagious vitality of that rarest of all rare gifts in +highly-civilized circles,--perfect health; that health which is in itself +the most exquisite luxury; which, finding happiness in the mere sense of +existence, diffuses round it, like an atmosphere, the harmless hilarity of +its bright animal being. Health, to the utmost perfection, is seldom +known after childhood; health to the utmost cannot be enjoyed by those who +overwork the brain, or admit the sure wear and tear of the passions. The +creature I had just seen gave me the notion of youth in the golden age of +the poets,--the youth of the careless Arcadian, before nymph or +shepherdess had vexed his heart with a sigh. + + + + +CHAPTER XXIV. + +The house I occupied at L---- was a quaint, old-fashioned building, a +corner-house. One side, in which was the front entrance, looked upon a +street which, as there were no shops in it, and it was no direct +thoroughfare to the busy centres of the town, was always quiet, and at +some hours of the day almost deserted. The other side of the house +fronted a lane; opposite to it was the long and high wall of the garden to +a Young Ladies' Boarding-school. My stables adjoined the house, abutting +on a row of smaller buildings, with little gardens before them, chiefly +occupied by mercantile clerks and retired tradesmen. By the lane there +was a short and ready access both to the high turnpike-road, and to some +pleasant walks through green meadows and along the banks of a river. + +This house I had inhabited since my arrival at L----, and it had to me so +many attractions, in a situation sufficiently central to be convenient for +patients, and yet free from noise, and favourable to ready outlet into the +country for such foot or horse exercise as my professional avocations +would allow me to carve for myself out of what the Latin poet calls the +"solid day," that I had refused to change it for one better suited to my +increased income; but it was not a house which Mrs. Ashleigh would have +liked for Lilian. The main objection to it in the eyes of the "genteel" +was, that it had formerly belonged to a member of the healing profession +who united the shop of an apothecary to the diploma of a surgeon; but that +shop had given the house a special attraction to me; for it had been built +out on the side of the house which fronted the lane, occupying the greater +portion of a small gravel court, fenced from the road by a low iron +palisade, and separated from the body of the house itself by a short and +narrow corridor that communicated with the entrance-hall. This shop I +turned into a rude study for scientific experiments, in which I generally +spent some early hours of the morning, before my visiting patients began +to arrive. I enjoyed the stillness of its separation from the rest of +the house; I enjoyed the glimpse of the great chestnut-trees, which +overtopped the wall of the school-garden; I enjoyed the ease with which, +by opening the glazed sash-door, I could get out, if disposed for a short +walk, into the pleasant fields; and so completely had I made this +sanctuary my own, that not only my man-servant knew that I was never to be +disturbed when in it, except by the summons of a patient, but even the +housemaid was forbidden to enter it with broom or duster, except upon +special invitation. The last thing at night, before retiring to rest, it +was the man-servant's business to see that the sash-window was closed, +and the gate to the iron palisade locked; but during the daytime I so +often went out of the house by that private way that the gate was then +very seldom locked, nor the sash-door bolted from within. In the town of +L---- there was little apprehension of house-robberies,--especially in the +daylight,--and certainly in this room, cut off from the main building, +there was nothing to attract a vulgar cupidity. A few of the apothecary's +shelves and cases still remained on the walls, with, here and there, a +bottle of some chemical preparation for experiment; two or three +worm-eaten, wooden chairs; two or three shabby old tables; an old +walnut-tree bureau without a lock, into which odds and ends were +confusedly thrust, and sundry ugly-looking inventions of mechanical +science, were, assuredly, not the articles which a timid proprietor would +guard with jealous care from the chances of robbery. It will be seen +later why I have been thus prolix in description. The morning after I had +met the young stranger by whom I had been so favourably impressed, I was +up as usual, a little before the sun, and long before any of my servants +were astir. I went first into the room I have mentioned, and which I +shall henceforth designate as my study, opened the window, unlocked the +gate, and sauntered for some minutes up and down the silent lace skirting +the opposite wall, and overhung by the chestnut-trees rich in the +garniture of a glorious summer; then, refreshed for work, I re-entered my +study, and was soon absorbed in the examination of that now well-known +machine, which was then, to me at least, a novelty,--invented, if I +remember right, by Dubois-Reymond, so distinguished by his researches into +the mysteries of organic electricity. It is a wooden cylinder fixed +against the edge of a table; on the table two vessels filled with salt and +water are so placed that, as you close your hands on the cylinder, the +forefinger of each hand can drop into the water; each of the vessels has a +metallic plate, and communicates by wires with a galvanometer with its +needle. Now the theory is, that if you clutch the cylinder firmly with +the right hand, leaving the left perfectly passive, the needle in the +galvanometer will move from west to south; if, in like manner, you exert +the left arm, leaving the right arm passive, the needle will deflect from +west to north. Hence, it is argued that the electric current is induced +through the agency of the nervous system, and that, as human Will produces +the muscular contraction requisite, so is it human Will that causes the +deflection of the needle. I imagine that if this theory were +substantiated by experiment, the discovery might lead to some sublime and +unconjectured secrets of science. For human Will, thus actively effective +on the electric current, and all matter, animate or inanimate, having more +or less of electricity, a vast field became opened to conjecture. By what +series of patient experimental deduction might not science arrive at the +solution of problems which the Newtonian law of gravitation does not +suffice to solve; and--But here I halt. At the date which my story has +reached, my mind never lost itself long in the Cloudland of Guess. + +I was dissatisfied with my experiment. The needle stirred, indeed, but +erratically, and not in directions which, according to the theory, should +correspond to my movement. I was about to dismiss the trial with some +uncharitable contempt of the foreign philosopher's dogmas, when I heard a +loud ring at my street-door. While I paused to conjecture whether my +servant was yet up to attend to the door, and which of my patients was the +most likely to summon me at so unseasonable an hour, a shadow darkened my +window. I looked up, and to my astonishment beheld the brilliant face of +Mr. Margrave. The sash to the door was already partially opened; he +raised it higher, and walked into the room. "Was it you who rang at the +street-door, and at this hour?" said I. + +"Yes; and observing, after I had rung, that all the shutters were still +closed, I felt ashamed of my own rash action, and made off rather than +brave the reproachful face of some injured housemaid, robbed of her +morning dreams. I turned down that pretty lane,--lured by the green of +the chestnut-trees,--caught sight of you through the window, took courage, +and here I am! You forgive me?" While thus speaking, he continued to +move along the littered floor of the dingy room, with the undulating +restlessness of some wild animal in the confines of its den, and he now +went on, in short fragmentary sentences, very slightly linked together, +but smoothed, as it were, into harmony by a voice musical and fresh as a +sky lark's warble. "Morning dreams, indeed! dreams that waste the life +of such a morning. Rosy magnificence of a summer dawn! Do you not pity +the fool who prefers to lie a bed, and to dream rather than to live? +What! and you, strong man, with those noble limbs, in this den! Do you +not long for a rush through the green of the fields, a bath in the blue of +the river?" + +Here he came to a pause, standing, still in the gray light of the growing +day, with eyes whose joyous lustre forestalled the sun's, and lips which +seemed to laugh even in repose. + +But presently those eyes, as quick as they were bright, glanced over the +walls, the floor, the shelves, the phials, the mechanical inventions, and +then rested full on my cylinder fixed to the table. He approached, +examined it curiously, asked what it was. I explained. To gratify him I +sat down and renewed my experiment, with equally ill success. The needle, +which should have moved from west to south, describing an angle of from +thirty degrees to forty or even fifty degrees, only made a few troubled, +undecided oscillations. + +"Tut," cried the young man, "I see what it is; you have a wound in your +right hand." + +That was true; I had burned my band a few days before in a chemical +experiment, and the sore had not healed. + +"Well," said I, "and what does that matter?" + +"Everything; the least scratch in the skin of the hand produces chemical +actions on the electric current, independently of your will. Let me try." + +He took my place, and in a moment the needle in the galvanometer responded +to his grasp on the cylinder, exactly as the inventive philosopher had +stated to be the due result of the experiment. + +I was startled. + +"But how came you, Mr. Margrave, to be so well acquainted with a +scientific process little known, and but recently discovered?" + +"I well acquainted! not so. But I am fond of all experiments that relate +to animal life. Electricity, especially, is full of interest." + +On that I drew him out (as I thought), and he talked volubly. I was +amazed to find this young man, in whose brain I had conceived thought kept +one careless holiday, was evidently familiar with the physical sciences, +and especially with chemistry, which was my own study by predilection. +But never had I met with a student in whom a knowledge so extensive was +mixed up with notions so obsolete or so crotchety. In one sentence he +showed that he had mastered some late discovery by Faraday or Liebig; in +the next sentence he was talking the wild fallacies of Cardan or Van +Helmont. I burst out laughing at some paradox about sympathetic powders, +which he enounced as if it were a recognized truth. + +"Pray tell me," said I, "who was your master in physics; for a cleverer +pupil never had a more crack-brained teacher." + +"No," he answered, with his merry laugh, "it is not the teacher's fault. +I am a mere parrot; just cry out a few scraps of learning picked up here +and there. But, however, I am fond of all researches into Nature; all +guesses at her riddles. To tell you the truth, one reason why I have +taken to you so heartily is not only that your published work caught my +fancy in the dip which I took into its contents (pardon me if I say dip, I +never do more than dip into any book), but also because young ---- tells +me that which all whom I have met in this town confirm; namely, that you +are one of those few practical chemists who are at once exceedingly +cautious and exceedingly bold,--willing to try every new experiment, but +submitting experiment to rigid tests. Well, I have an experiment running +wild in this giddy head of mine, and I want you, some day when at leisure, +to catch it, fix it as you have fixed that cylinder, make something of it. +I am sure you can." + +"What is it?" + +"Something akin to the theories in your work. You would replenish or +preserve to each special constitution the special substance that may fail +to the equilibrium of its health. But you own that in a large +proportion of cases the best cure of disease is less to deal with the +disease itself than to support and stimulate the whole system, so as to +enable Nature to cure the disease and restore the impaired equilibrium by +her own agencies. Thus, if you find that in certain cases of nervous +debility a substance like nitric acid is efficacious, it is because the +nitric acid has a virtue in locking up, as it were, the nervous +energy,--that is, preventing all undue waste. Again, in some cases of +what is commonly called feverish cold, stimulants like ammonia assist +Nature itself to get rid of the disorder that oppresses its normal action; +and, on the same principle, I apprehend, it is contended that a large +average of human lives is saved in those hospitals which have adopted the +supporting system of ample nourishment and alcoholic stimulants." + +"Your medical learning surprises me," said I, smiling; "and without +pausing to notice where it deals somewhat superficially with disputable +points in general, and my own theory in particular, I ask you for the +deduction you draw from your premises." + +"It is simply this: that to all animate bodies, however various, there +must be one principle in common,--the vital principle itself. What if +there be one certain means of recruiting that principle; and what if that +secret can be discovered?" + +"Pshaw! The old illusion of the mediaeval empirics." + +"Not so. But the mediaeval empirics were great discoverers. You sneer at +Van Helmont, who sought, in water, the principle of all things; but Van +Helmont discovered in his search those invisible bodies called gases. Now +the principle of life must be certainly ascribed to a gas.[1] And what +ever is a gas chemistry should not despair of producing! But I can argue +no longer now,--never can argue long at a stretch; we are wasting the +morning; and, joy! the sun is up! See! Out! come out! out! and greet +the great Lifegiver face to face." + +I could not resist the young man's invitation. In a few minutes we were +in the quiet lane under the glinting chestnut-trees. Margrave was +chanting, low, a wild tune,--words in a strange language. + +"What words are those,--no European language, I think; for I know a little +of most of the languages which are spoken in our quarter of the globe, at +least by its more civilized races." + +"Civilized race! What is civilization? Those words were uttered by men +who founded empires when Europe itself was not civilized! Hush, is it not +a grand old air?" and lifting his eyes towards the sun, he gave vent to a +voice clear and deep as a mighty bell! The air was grand; the words had a +sonorous swell that suited it, and they seemed to me jubilant and yet +solemn. He stopped abruptly as a path from the lane had led us into the +fields, already half-bathed in sunlight, dews glittering on the hedgerows. + +"Your song," said I, "would go well with the clash of cymbals or the peal +of the organ. I am no judge of melody, but this strikes me as that of a +religious hymn." + +"I compliment you on the guess. It is a Persian fire-worshipper's hymn to +the sun. The dialect is very different from modern Persian. Cyrus the +Great might have chanted it on his march upon Babylon." + +"And where did you learn it?" + +"In Persia itself." + +"You have travelled much, learned much,--and are so young and so fresh. +Is it an impertinent question if I ask whether your parents are yet +living, or are you wholly lord of yourself?" + +"Thank you for the question,--pray make my answer known in the town. +Parents I have not,--never had." + +"Never had parents!" + +"Well, I ought rather to say that no parents ever owned me. I am a +natural son, a vagabond, a nobody. When I came of age I received an +anonymous letter, informing me that a sum--I need not say what, but more +than enough for all I need--was lodged at an English banker's in my name; +that my mother had died in my infancy; that my father was also dead--but +recently; that as I was a child of love, and he was unwilling that the +secret of my birth should ever be traced, he had provided for me, not by +will, but in his life, by a sum consigned to the trust of the friend who +now wrote to me; I need give myself no trouble to learn more. Faith, I +never did! I am young, healthy, rich,--yes, rich! Now you know all, and +you had better tell it, that I may win no man's courtesy and no maiden's +love upon false pretences. I have not even a right, you see, to the name +I bear. Hist! let me catch that squirrel." + +With what a panther-like bound he sprang! The squirrel eluded his grasp, +and was up the oak-tree; in a moment he was up the oak-tree too. In +amazement I saw him rising from bough to bough; saw his bright eyes and +glittering teeth through the green leaves. Presently I heard the sharp +piteous cry of the squirrel, echoed by the youth's merry laugh; and down, +through that maze of green, Hargrave came, dropping on the grass and +bounding up, as Mercury might have bounded with his wings at his heels. + +"I have caught him. What pretty brown eyes!" + +Suddenly the gay expression of his face changed to that of a savage; the +squirrel had wrenched itself half-loose, and bitten him. The poor brute! +In an instant its neck was wrung, its body dashed on the ground; and that +fair young creature, every feature quivering with rage, was stamping his +foot on his victim again and again! It was horrible. I caught him by the +arm indignantly. He turned round on me like a wild beast disturbed from +its prey,--his teeth set, his hand lifted, his eyes like balls of fire. + +"Shame!" said I, calmly; "shame on you!" + +He continued to gaze on me a moment or so, his eye glaring, his breath +panting; and then, as if mastering himself with an involuntary effort, his +arm dropped to his side, and he said quite humbly, "I beg your pardon; +indeed I do. I was beside myself for a moment; I cannot bear pain; "and +he looked in deep compassion for himself at his wounded hand. "Venomous +brute!" And he stamped again on the body of the squirrel, already crushed +out of shape. + +I moved away in disgust, and walked on. + +But presently I felt my arm softly drawn aside, and a voice, dulcet as the +coo of a dove, stole its way into my ears. There was no resisting the +charm with which this extraordinary mortal could fascinate even the hard +and the cold; nor them, perhaps, the least. For as you see in extreme old +age, when the heart seems to have shrunk into itself, and to leave but +meagre and nipped affections for the nearest relations if grown up, the +indurated egotism softens at once towards a playful child; or as you see +in middle life, some misanthrope, whose nature has been soured by wrong +and sorrow, shrink from his own species, yet make friends with inferior +races, and respond to the caress of a dog,--so, for the worldling or the +cynic, there was an attraction in the freshness of this joyous favourite +of Nature,--an attraction like that of a beautiful child, spoilt and +wayward, or of a graceful animal, half docile, half fierce. + +"But," said I, with a smile, as I felt all displeasure gone, "such +indulgence of passion for such a trifle is surely unworthy a student of +philosophy!" + +"Trifle," he said dolorously. "But I tell you it is pain; pain is no +trifle. I suffer. Look!" + +I looked at the hand, which I took in mine. The bite no doubt had been +sharp; but the hand that lay in my own was that which the Greek sculptor +gives to a gladiator; not large (the extremities are never large in +persons whose strength comes from the just proportion of all the members, +rather than the factitious and partial force which continued muscular +exertion will give to one part of the frame, to the comparative weakening +of the rest), but with the firm-knit joints, the solid fingers, the +finished nails, the massive palm, the supple polished skin, in which we +recognize what Nature designs the human hand to be,--the skilled, swift, +mighty doer of all those marvels which win Nature herself from the +wilderness. + +"It is strange," said I, thoughtfully; "but your susceptibility to +suffering confirms my opinion, which is different from the popular +belief,--namely, that pain is most acutely felt by those in whom the +animal organization being perfect, and the sense of vitality exquisitely +keen, every injury or lesion finds the whole system rise, as it were, to +repel the mischief and communicate the consciousness of it to all those +nerves which are the sentinels to the garrison of life. Yet my theory is +scarcely borne out by general fact. The Indian savages must have a health +as perfect as yours; a nervous system as fine,--witness their marvellous +accuracy of ear, of eye, of scent, probably also of touch; yet they are +indifferent to physical pain; or must I mortify your pride by saying that +they have some moral quality defective in you which enables them to rise +superior to it?" + +"The Indian savages," said Margrave, sullenly, "have not a health as +perfect as mine, and in what you call vitality--the blissful consciousness +of life--they are as sticks and stones compared to me." + +"How do you know?" + +"Because I have lived with them. It is a fallacy to suppose that the +savage has a health superior to that of the civilized man,--if the +civilized man be but temperate; and even if not, he has the stamina that +can resist for years the effect of excesses which would destroy the savage +in a month. As to the savage's fine perceptions of sense, such do not +come from exquisite equilibrium of system, but are hereditary attributes +transmitted from race to race, and strengthened by training from infancy. +But is a pointer stronger and healthier than a mastiff, because the +pointer through long descent and early teaching creeps stealthily to his +game and stands to it motionless? I will talk of this later; now I +suffer! Pain, pain! Has life any ill but pain?" + +It so happened that I had about me some roots of the white lily, which I +meant, before returning home, to leave with a patient suffering from one +of those acute local inflammations, in which that simple remedy often +affords great relief. I cut up one of these roots, and bound the cooling +leaves to the wounded hand with my handkerchief. + +"There," said I. "Fortunately if you feel pain more sensibly than others, +you will recover from it more quickly." And in a few minutes my +companion felt perfectly relieved, and poured out his gratitude with an +extravagance of expression and a beaming delight of countenance which +positively touched me. + +"I almost feel," said I, "as I do when I have stilled an infant's wailing, +and restored it smiling to its mother's breast." + +"You have done so. I am an infant, and Nature is my mother. Oh, to be +restored to the full joy of life, the scent of wild flowers, the song of +birds, and this air--summer air--summer air!" + +I know not why it was, but at that moment, looking at him and hearing him, +I rejoiced that Lilian was not at L----. "But I came out to bathe. Can +we not bathe in that stream?" + +"No. You would derange the bandage round your hand; and for all bodily +ills, from the least to the gravest, there is nothing like leaving Nature +at rest the moment we have hit on the means which assist her own efforts +at cure." + +"I obey, then; but I so love the water." + +"You swim, of course?" + +"Ask the fish if it swim. Ask the fish if it can escape me! I delight to +dive down--down; to plunge after the startled trout, as an otter does; and +then to get amongst those cool, fragrant reeds and bulrushes, or that +forest of emerald weed which one sometimes finds waving under clear +rivers. Man! man! could you live but an hour of my life you would know +how horrible a thing it is to die!" + +"Yet the dying do not think so; they pass away calm and smiling, as you +will one day." + +"I--I! die one day--die!" and he sank on the grass, and buried his face +amongst the herbage, sobbing aloud. + +Before I could get through half a dozen words I meant to soothe, he had +once more bounded up, dashed the tears from his eyes, and was again +singing some wild, barbaric chant. Abstracting itself from the appeal to +its outward sense by melodies of which the language was unknown, my mind +soon grew absorbed in meditative conjectures on the singular nature, so +wayward, so impulsive, which had forced intimacy on a man grave and +practical as myself. + +I was puzzled how to reconcile so passionate a childishness, so +undisciplined a want of self-control, with an experience of mankind so +extended by travel, with an education desultory and irregular indeed, but +which must, at some time or other, have been familiarized to severe +reasonings and laborious studies. In Margrave there seemed to be wanting +that mysterious something which is needed to keep our faculties, however +severally brilliant, harmoniously linked together,--as the string by +which a child mechanically binds the wildflowers it gathers, shaping them +at choice into the garland or the chain. + +[1] "According to the views we have mentioned, we must ascribe life to a +gas, that is, to an aeriform body."--Liebig: "Organic Chemistry," +Mayfair's translation, p.363.--It is perhaps not less superfluous to add +that Liebig does not support the views "according to which life must be +ascribed to a gas," than it would be to state, had Dugald Stewart been +quoted as writing, "According to the views we have mentioned the mind is +but a bundle of impressions," that Dugald Stewart was not supporting, but +opposing, the views of David Hume. The quotation is merely meant to show, +in the shortest possible compass, that there are views entertained by +speculative reasoners of our day which, according to Liebig, would lead to +the inference at which Margrave so boldly arrives. Margrave is, however, +no doubt, led to his belief by his reminiscences of Van Helmont, to whose +discovery of gas he is referring. Van Helmont plainly affirms "that the +arterial spirit of our life is of the nature of a gas;" and in the same +chapter (on the fiction of elementary complexions and mixtures) says, +"Seeing that the spirit of our life, since it is a gas, is most mightily +and swiftly affected by any other gas," etc. He repeats the same dogma in +his treatise on "Long Life," and indeed very generally throughout his +writings, observing, in his chapter on the Vital Air, that the spirit of +life is a salt, sharp vapour, made of the arterial blood, etc. Liebig, +therefore, in confuting some modern notions as to the nature of contagion +by miasma, is leading their reasonings back to that assumption in the +Brawn of physiological science by which the discoverer of gas exalted into +the principle of life the substance to which he first gave the name, now +so familiarly known. It is nevertheless just to Van Helmont to add that +his conception of the vital principle was very far from being as purely +materialistic as it would seem to those unacquainted with his writings; +for he carefully distinguishes that principle of life which he ascribes to +a gas, and by which he means the sensuous animal life, from the +intellectual immortal principle of soul. Van Helmont, indeed, was a +sincere believer of Divine Revelation. "The Lord Jesus is the way, the +truth, and the life," says with earnest humility this daring genius, in +that noble chapter "On the completing of the mind by the 'prayer of +silence,' and the loving offering tip of the heart, soul, and strength to +the obedience of the Divine will," from which some of the most eloquent of +recent philosophers, arguing against materialism, have borrowed largely in +support and in ornament of their lofty cause. + + + + + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK STRANGE STORY, LYTTON, V2 *** + +******* This file should be named 7693.txt or 7693.zip ******* + +This eBook was produced by Andrew Heath +and David Widger + +Project Gutenberg eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the US +unless a copyright notice is included. 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