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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text diff --git a/7247-h.zip b/7247-h.zip Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..776aad7 --- /dev/null +++ b/7247-h.zip diff --git a/7247-h/7247-h.htm b/7247-h/7247-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..c11f5a6 --- /dev/null +++ b/7247-h/7247-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,2068 @@ +<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.01 Transitional//EN"> +<html> +<head> +<title>A CONNECTICUT YANKEE, By Twain, Part 6.</title> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=iso-8859-1"> + +<style type="text/css"> + <!-- + body {background:#faebd7; margin:10%; text-align:justify} + P { text-indent: 1em; + margin-top: .75em; + margin-bottom: .75em; } + H1,H2,H3,H4,H5,H6 { text-align: center; } + HR { width: 33%; text-align: center; } + blockquote {font-size: 97% } + .figleft {float: left;} + .figright {float: right;} + .toc { margin-left: 15%; margin-bottom: 0em;} + CENTER { padding: 10px;} + // --> +</style> + +</head> +<body> + +<h2>A CONNECTICUT YANKEE, By Twain, Part 6.</h2> +<pre> + +The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's +Court, Part 6., by Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court, Part 6. + +Author: Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) + +Release Date: July 6, 2004 [EBook #7247] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONNECTICUT YANKEE *** + + + + +Produced by David Widger + + + + + +</pre> + + + + + + + +<br> +<hr> +<br><br><br><br><br><br> + + + +<center> +<img alt="bookcover.jpg (121K)" src="images/bookcover.jpg" height="1017" width="952"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="Extra.jpg (144K)" src="images/Extra.jpg" height="743" width="1117"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<center> +<img alt="titlepage.jpg (58K)" src="images/titlepage.jpg" height="1066" width="779"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + + +<center> +<h1>A CONNECTICUT YANKEE +<br><br>IN KING ARTHUR'S COURT</h1> +<br> +<h3>by</h3> +<br> +<h2>MARK TWAIN</h2> +<h3>(Samuel L. Clemens) +<br><br> +Part 6. +</h3> +</center> + +<br><br><br><br> + + + +<h2>CONTENTS:</h2> +<center> +<table summary=""> +<tr><td> + + + +<a href="#c27">CHAPTER XXVII.</a> </td><td>THE YANKEE AND THE KING TRAVEL INCOGNITO<br></td></tr><tr><td> +<a href="#c28">CHAPTER XXVIII.</a> </td><td>DRILLING THE KING<br></td></tr><tr><td> +<a href="#c29">CHAPTER XXIX.</a> </td><td>THE SMALL-POX HUT<br></td></tr><tr><td> +<a href="#c30">CHAPTER XXX.</a> </td><td>THE TRAGEDY OF THE MANOR-HOUSE<br></td></tr><tr><td> +<a href="#c31">CHAPTER XXXI.</a> </td><td>MARCO<br></td></tr> + + + +</table> +</center> + + + + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="27-345.jpg (70K)" src="images/27-345.jpg" height="894" width="562"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<br><br><a name="c27"></a><br><br><center><h2>CHAPTER XXVII</h2></center><br><br> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="27-347.jpg (133K)" src="images/27-347.jpg" height="904" width="748"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>THE YANKEE AND THE KING TRAVEL INCOGNITO</p> + +<p>About bedtime I took the king to my private quarters to cut his +hair and help him get the hang of the lowly raiment he was to wear. +The high classes wore their hair banged across the forehead but +hanging to the shoulders the rest of the way around, whereas the +lowest ranks of commoners were banged fore and aft both; the slaves +were bangless, and allowed their hair free growth. So I inverted +a bowl over his head and cut away all the locks that hung below it. +I also trimmed his whiskers and mustache until they were only +about a half-inch long; and tried to do it inartistically, and +succeeded. It was a villainous disfigurement. When he got his +lubberly sandals on, and his long robe of coarse brown linen cloth, +which hung straight from his neck to his ankle-bones, he was no +longer the comeliest man in his kingdom, but one of the unhandsomest +and most commonplace and unattractive. We were dressed and barbered +alike, and could pass for small farmers, or farm bailiffs, or +shepherds, or carters; yes, or for village artisans, if we chose, +our costume being in effect universal among the poor, because of +its strength and cheapness. I don't mean that it was really cheap +to a very poor person, but I do mean that it was the cheapest +material there was for male attire—manufactured material, you +understand.</p> + +<p>We slipped away an hour before dawn, and by broad sun-up had made +eight or ten miles, and were in the midst of a sparsely settled +country. I had a pretty heavy knapsack; it was laden with +provisions—provisions for the king to taper down on, till he +could take to the coarse fare of the country without damage.</p> + +<p>I found a comfortable seat for the king by the roadside, and then +gave him a morsel or two to stay his stomach with. Then I said +I would find some water for him, and strolled away. Part of my +project was to get out of sight and sit down and rest a little +myself. It had always been my custom to stand when in his presence; +even at the council board, except upon those rare occasions when +the sitting was a very long one, extending over hours; then I had +a trifling little backless thing which was like a reversed culvert +and was as comfortable as the toothache. I didn't want to break +him in suddenly, but do it by degrees. We should have to sit +together now when in company, or people would notice; but it would +not be good politics for me to be playing equality with him when +there was no necessity for it.</p> + +<p>I found the water some three hundred yards away, and had been +resting about twenty minutes, when I heard voices. That is all +right, I thought—peasants going to work; nobody else likely to be +stirring this early. But the next moment these comers jingled into +sight around a turn of the road—smartly clad people of quality, +with luggage-mules and servants in their train! I was off like +a shot, through the bushes, by the shortest cut. For a while it +did seem that these people would pass the king before I could +get to him; but desperation gives you wings, you know, and I canted +my body forward, inflated my breast, and held my breath and flew. +I arrived. And in plenty good enough time, too.</p> + +<p>"Pardon, my king, but it's no time for ceremony—jump! Jump to +your feet—some quality are coming!"</p> + +<p>"Is that a marvel? Let them come."</p> + +<p>"But my liege! You must not be seen sitting. Rise!—and stand in +humble posture while they pass. You are a peasant, you know."</p> + +<p>"True—I had forgot it, so lost was I in planning of a huge war +with Gaul"—he was up by this time, but a farm could have got up +quicker, if there was any kind of a boom in real estate—"and +right-so a thought came randoming overthwart this majestic dream +the which—"</p> + +<p>"A humbler attitude, my lord the king—and quick! Duck your +head!—more!—still more!—droop it!"</p> + +<p>He did his honest best, but lord, it was no great things. He looked +as humble as the leaning tower at Pisa. It is the most you could +say of it. Indeed, it was such a thundering poor success that +it raised wondering scowls all along the line, and a gorgeous +flunkey at the tail end of it raised his whip; but I jumped in +time and was under it when it fell; and under cover of the volley +of coarse laughter which followed, I spoke up sharply and warned +the king to take no notice. He mastered himself for the moment, +but it was a sore tax; he wanted to eat up the procession. I said:</p> + +<p>"It would end our adventures at the very start; and we, being +without weapons, could do nothing with that armed gang. If we +are going to succeed in our emprise, we must not only look the +peasant but act the peasant."</p> + +<p>"It is wisdom; none can gainsay it. Let us go on, Sir Boss. +I will take note and learn, and do the best I may."</p> + +<p>He kept his word. He did the best he could, but I've seen better. +If you have ever seen an active, heedless, enterprising child +going diligently out of one mischief and into another all day +long, and an anxious mother at its heels all the while, and just +saving it by a hair from drowning itself or breaking its neck with +each new experiment, you've seen the king and me.</p> + +<p>If I could have foreseen what the thing was going to be like, +I should have said, No, if anybody wants to make his living +exhibiting a king as a peasant, let him take the layout; I can +do better with a menagerie, and last longer. And yet, during +the first three days I never allowed him to enter a hut or other +dwelling. If he could pass muster anywhere during his early +novitiate it would be in small inns and on the road; so to these +places we confined ourselves. Yes, he certainly did the best he +could, but what of that? He didn't improve a bit that I could see.</p> + +<p>He was always frightening me, always breaking out with fresh +astonishers, in new and unexpected places. Toward evening on +the second day, what does he do but blandly fetch out a dirk +from inside his robe!</p> + +<p>"Great guns, my liege, where did you get that?"</p> + +<p>"From a smuggler at the inn, yester eve."</p> + +<p>"What in the world possessed you to buy it?"</p> + +<p>"We have escaped divers dangers by wit—thy wit—but I have +bethought me that it were but prudence if I bore a weapon, too. +Thine might fail thee in some pinch."</p> + +<p>"But people of our condition are not allowed to carry arms. What +would a lord say—yes, or any other person of whatever +condition—if he caught an upstart peasant with a dagger on his person?"</p> + +<p>It was a lucky thing for us that nobody came along just then. +I persuaded him to throw the dirk away; and it was as easy as +persuading a child to give up some bright fresh new way of killing +itself. We walked along, silent and thinking. Finally the king said:</p> + +<p>"When ye know that I meditate a thing inconvenient, or that hath +a peril in it, why do you not warn me to cease from that project?"</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="27-351.jpg (83K)" src="images/27-351.jpg" height="652" width="584"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>It was a startling question, and a puzzler. I didn't quite know +how to take hold of it, or what to say, and so, of course, I ended +by saying the natural thing:</p> + +<p>"But, sire, how can I know what your thoughts are?"</p> + +<p>The king stopped dead in his tracks, and stared at me.</p> + +<p>"I believed thou wert greater than Merlin; and truly in magic +thou art. But prophecy is greater than magic. Merlin is a prophet."</p> + +<p>I saw I had made a blunder. I must get back my lost ground. +After a deep reflection and careful planning, I said:</p> + +<p>"Sire, I have been misunderstood. I will explain. There are two +kinds of prophecy. One is the gift to foretell things that are but +a little way off, the other is the gift to foretell things that +are whole ages and centuries away. Which is the mightier gift, +do you think?"</p> + +<p>"Oh, the last, most surely!"</p> + +<p>"True. Does Merlin possess it?"</p> + +<p>"Partly, yes. He foretold mysteries about my birth and future +kingship that were twenty years away."</p> + +<p>"Has he ever gone beyond that?"</p> + +<p>"He would not claim more, I think."</p> + +<p>"It is probably his limit. All prophets have their limit. The limit +of some of the great prophets has been a hundred years."</p> + +<p>"These are few, I ween."</p> + +<p>"There have been two still greater ones, whose limit was four +hundred and six hundred years, and one whose limit compassed +even seven hundred and twenty."</p> + +<p>"Gramercy, it is marvelous!"</p> + +<p>"But what are these in comparison with me? They are nothing."</p> + +<p>"What? Canst thou truly look beyond even so vast a stretch +of time as—"</p> + +<p>"Seven hundred years? My liege, as clear as the vision of an eagle +does my prophetic eye penetrate and lay bare the future of this +world for nearly thirteen centuries and a half!"</p> + +<p>My land, you should have seen the king's eyes spread slowly open, +and lift the earth's entire atmosphere as much as an inch! That +settled Brer Merlin. One never had any occasion to prove his +facts, with these people; all he had to do was to state them. It +never occurred to anybody to doubt the statement.</p> + +<p>"Now, then," I continued, "I <i>could</i> work both kinds of +prophecy—the long and the short—if I chose to take the trouble to keep +in practice; but I seldom exercise any but the long kind, because +the other is beneath my dignity. It is properer to Merlin's +sort—stump-tail prophets, as we call them in the profession. Of course, +I whet up now and then and flirt out a minor prophecy, but not +often—hardly ever, in fact. You will remember that there was +great talk, when you reached the Valley of Holiness, about my +having prophesied your coming and the very hour of your arrival, +two or three days beforehand."</p> + +<p>"Indeed, yes, I mind it now."</p> + +<p>"Well, I could have done it as much as forty times easier, and +piled on a thousand times more detail into the bargain, if it had +been five hundred years away instead of two or three days."</p> + +<p>"How amazing that it should be so!"</p> + +<p>"Yes, a genuine expert can always foretell a thing that is five +hundred years away easier than he can a thing that's only five +hundred seconds off."</p> + +<p>"And yet in reason it should clearly be the other way; it should +be five hundred times as easy to foretell the last as the first, +for, indeed, it is so close by that one uninspired might almost +see it. In truth, the law of prophecy doth contradict the likelihoods, +most strangely making the difficult easy, and the easy difficult."</p> + +<p>It was a wise head. A peasant's cap was no safe disguise for it; +you could know it for a king's under a diving-bell, if you could +hear it work its intellect.</p> + +<p>I had a new trade now, and plenty of business in it. The king +was as hungry to find out everything that was going to happen +during the next thirteen centuries as if he were expecting to live +in them. From that time out, I prophesied myself bald-headed +trying to supply the demand. I have done some indiscreet things in +my day, but this thing of playing myself for a prophet was the +worst. Still, it had its ameliorations. A prophet doesn't have +to have any brains. They are good to have, of course, for the +ordinary exigencies of life, but they are no use in professional +work. It is the restfulest vocation there is. When the spirit of +prophecy comes upon you, you merely cake your intellect and lay it +off in a cool place for a rest, and unship your jaw and leave it +alone; it will work itself: the result is prophecy.</p> + +<p>Every day a knight-errant or so came along, and the sight of them +fired the king's martial spirit every time. He would have forgotten +himself, sure, and said something to them in a style a suspicious +shade or so above his ostensible degree, and so I always got him +well out of the road in time. Then he would stand and look with +all his eyes; and a proud light would flash from them, and his +nostrils would inflate like a war-horse's, and I knew he was +longing for a brush with them. But about noon of the third day +I had stopped in the road to take a precaution which had been +suggested by the whip-stroke that had fallen to my share two days +before; a precaution which I had afterward decided to leave untaken, +I was so loath to institute it; but now I had just had a fresh +reminder: while striding heedlessly along, with jaw spread and +intellect at rest, for I was prophesying, I stubbed my toe and +fell sprawling. I was so pale I couldn't think for a moment; +then I got softly and carefully up and unstrapped my knapsack. +I had that dynamite bomb in it, done up in wool in a box. It was +a good thing to have along; the time would come when I could do +a valuable miracle with it, maybe, but it was a nervous thing +to have about me, and I didn't like to ask the king to carry it. +Yet I must either throw it away or think up some safe way to get +along with its society. I got it out and slipped it into my scrip, +and just then here came a couple of knights. The king stood, +stately as a statue, gazing toward them—had forgotten himself again, +of course—and before I could get a word of warning out, it was +time for him to skip, and well that he did it, too. He supposed +they would turn aside. Turn aside to avoid trampling peasant dirt +under foot? When had he ever turned aside himself—or ever had +the chance to do it, if a peasant saw him or any other noble knight +in time to judiciously save him the trouble? The knights paid +no attention to the king at all; it was his place to look out +himself, and if he hadn't skipped he would have been placidly +ridden down, and laughed at besides.</p> + +<p>The king was in a flaming fury, and launched out his challenge +and epithets with a most royal vigor. The knights were some little +distance by now. They halted, greatly surprised, and turned in +their saddles and looked back, as if wondering if it might be worth +while to bother with such scum as we. Then they wheeled and +started for us. Not a moment must be lost. I started for <i>them</i> . +I passed them at a rattling gait, and as I went by I flung out a +hair-lifting soul-scorching thirteen-jointed insult which made +the king's effort poor and cheap by comparison. I got it out of +the nineteenth century where they know how. They had such headway +that they were nearly to the king before they could check up; +then, frantic with rage, they stood up their horses on their hind +hoofs and whirled them around, and the next moment here they came, +breast to breast. I was seventy yards off, then, and scrambling up +a great bowlder at the roadside. When they were within thirty +yards of me they let their long lances droop to a level, depressed +their mailed heads, and so, with their horse-hair plumes streaming +straight out behind, most gallant to see, this lightning express +came tearing for me! When they were within fifteen yards, I sent +that bomb with a sure aim, and it struck the ground just under +the horses' noses.</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="27-356.jpg (117K)" src="images/27-356.jpg" height="717" width="701"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>Yes, it was a neat thing, very neat and pretty to see. It resembled +a steamboat explosion on the Mississippi; and during the next +fifteen minutes we stood under a steady drizzle of microscopic +fragments of knights and hardware and horse-flesh. I say we, +for the king joined the audience, of course, as soon as he had got +his breath again. There was a hole there which would afford steady +work for all the people in that region for some years to +come—in trying to explain it, I mean; as for filling it up, that service +would be comparatively prompt, and would fall to the lot of a +select few—peasants of that seignory; and they wouldn't get +anything for it, either.</p> + +<p>But I explained it to the king myself. I said it was done with a +dynamite bomb. This information did him no damage, because it +left him as intelligent as he was before. However, it was a noble +miracle, in his eyes, and was another settler for Merlin. I thought +it well enough to explain that this was a miracle of so rare a sort +that it couldn't be done except when the atmospheric conditions +were just right. Otherwise he would be encoring it every time we +had a good subject, and that would be inconvenient, because I +hadn't any more bombs along.</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="28-359.jpg (108K)" src="images/28-359.jpg" height="1035" width="728"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<br><br><a name="c28"></a><br><br><center><h2>CHAPTER XXVIII</h2></center><br><br> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="28-361.jpg (132K)" src="images/28-361.jpg" height="860" width="733"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>DRILLING THE KING</p> + +<p>On the morning of the fourth day, when it was just sunrise, and we +had been tramping an hour in the chill dawn, I came to a resolution: +the king <i>must</i> be drilled; things could not go on so, he must be +taken in hand and deliberately and conscientiously drilled, or we +couldn't ever venture to enter a dwelling; the very cats would know +this masquerader for a humbug and no peasant. So I called a halt +and said:</p> + +<p>"Sire, as between clothes and countenance, you are all right, there +is no discrepancy; but as between your clothes and your bearing, +you are all wrong, there is a most noticeable discrepancy. Your +soldierly stride, your lordly port—these will not do. You stand +too straight, your looks are too high, too confident. The cares +of a kingdom do not stoop the shoulders, they do not droop the chin, +they do not depress the high level of the eye-glance, they do not +put doubt and fear in the heart and hang out the signs of them +in slouching body and unsure step. It is the sordid cares of +the lowly born that do these things. You must learn the trick; +you must imitate the trademarks of poverty, misery, oppression, +insult, and the other several and common inhumanities that sap +the manliness out of a man and make him a loyal and proper and +approved subject and a satisfaction to his masters, or the very +infants will know you for better than your disguise, and we shall go +to pieces at the first hut we stop at. Pray try to walk like this."</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="28-362.jpg (113K)" src="images/28-362.jpg" height="682" width="731"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>The king took careful note, and then tried an imitation.</p> + +<p>"Pretty fair—pretty fair. Chin a little lower, please—there, very +good. Eyes too high; pray don't look at the horizon, look at the +ground, ten steps in front of you. Ah—that is better, that is +very good. Wait, please; you betray too much vigor, too much +decision; you want more of a shamble. Look at me, please—this is +what I mean.... Now you are getting it; that is the idea—at least, +it sort of approaches it.... Yes, that is pretty fair. <i>But!</i> +There is a great big something wanting, I don't quite know what +it is. Please walk thirty yards, so that I can get a perspective +on the thing.... Now, then—your head's right, speed's right, +shoulders right, eyes right, chin right, gait, carriage, general +style right—everything's right! And yet the fact remains, the +aggregate's wrong. The account don't balance. Do it again, +please.... <i>Now</i> I think I begin to see what it is. Yes, I've +struck it. You see, the genuine spiritlessness is wanting; that's +what's the trouble. It's all <i>amateur</i>—mechanical details all +right, almost to a hair; everything about the delusion perfect, +except that it don't delude."</p> + +<p>"What, then, must one do, to prevail?"</p> + +<p>"Let me think... I can't seem to quite get at it. In fact, there +isn't anything that can right the matter but practice. This is +a good place for it: roots and stony ground to break up your +stately gait, a region not liable to interruption, only one field +and one hut in sight, and they so far away that nobody could +see us from there. It will be well to move a little off the road +and put in the whole day drilling you, sire."</p> + +<p>After the drill had gone on a little while, I said:</p> + +<p>"Now, sire, imagine that we are at the door of the hut yonder, +and the family are before us. Proceed, please—accost the head +of the house."</p> + +<p>The king unconsciously straightened up like a monument, and said, +with frozen austerity:</p> + +<p>"Varlet, bring a seat; and serve to me what cheer ye have."</p> + +<p>"Ah, your grace, that is not well done."</p> + +<p>"In what lacketh it?"</p> + +<p>"These people do not call <i>each other</i> varlets."</p> + +<p>"Nay, is that true?"</p> + +<p>"Yes; only those above them call them so."</p> + +<p>"Then must I try again. I will call him villein."</p> + +<p>"No-no; for he may be a freeman."</p> + +<p>"Ah—so. Then peradventure I should call him goodman."</p> + +<p>"That would answer, your grace, but it would be still better if +you said friend, or brother."</p> + +<p>"Brother!—to dirt like that?"</p> + +<p>"Ah, but <i>we</i> are pretending to be dirt like that, too."</p> + +<p>"It is even true. I will say it. Brother, bring a seat, and +thereto what cheer ye have, withal. Now 'tis right."</p> + +<p>"Not quite, not wholly right. You have asked for one, +not <i>us</i>—for one, not both; food for one, a seat for one."</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="28-363.jpg (48K)" src="images/28-363.jpg" height="314" width="726"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>The king looked puzzled—he wasn't a very heavy weight, intellectually. +His head was an hour-glass; it could stow an idea, but it had to do +it a grain at a time, not the whole idea at once.</p> + +<p>"Would <i>you</i> have a seat also—and sit?"</p> + +<p>"If I did not sit, the man would perceive that we were only pretending +to be equals—and playing the deception pretty poorly, too."</p> + +<p>"It is well and truly said! How wonderful is truth, come it in +whatsoever unexpected form it may! Yes, he must bring out seats +and food for both, and in serving us present not ewer and napkin +with more show of respect to the one than to the other."</p> + +<p>"And there is even yet a detail that needs correcting. He must +bring nothing outside; we will go in—in among the dirt, and +possibly other repulsive things,—and take the food with the +household, and after the fashion of the house, and all on equal +terms, except the man be of the serf class; and finally, there +will be no ewer and no napkin, whether he be serf or free. Please +walk again, my liege. There—it is better—it is the best yet; +but not perfect. The shoulders have known no ignobler burden +than iron mail, and they will not stoop."</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="28-365.jpg (143K)" src="images/28-365.jpg" height="1011" width="711"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>"Give me, then, the bag. I will learn the spirit that goeth +with burdens that have not honor. It is the spirit that stoopeth +the shoulders, I ween, and not the weight; for armor is heavy, +yet it is a proud burden, and a man standeth straight in it.... +Nay, but me no buts, offer me no objections. I will have the thing. +Strap it upon my back."</p> + +<p>He was complete now with that knapsack on, and looked as little +like a king as any man I had ever seen. But it was an obstinate +pair of shoulders; they could not seem to learn the trick of +stooping with any sort of deceptive naturalness. The drill went on, +I prompting and correcting:</p> + +<p>"Now, make believe you are in debt, and eaten up by relentless +creditors; you are out of work—which is horse-shoeing, let us +say—and can get none; and your wife is sick, your children are +crying because they are hungry—"</p> + +<p>And so on, and so on. I drilled him as representing in turn all +sorts of people out of luck and suffering dire privations and +misfortunes. But lord, it was only just words, words—they meant +nothing in the world to him, I might just as well have whistled. +Words realize nothing, vivify nothing to you, unless you have +suffered in your own person the thing which the words try to +describe. There are wise people who talk ever so knowingly and +complacently about "the working classes," and satisfy themselves +that a day's hard intellectual work is very much harder than +a day's hard manual toil, and is righteously entitled to much +bigger pay. Why, they really think that, you know, because they +know all about the one, but haven't tried the other. But I know +all about both; and so far as I am concerned, there isn't money +enough in the universe to hire me to swing a pickaxe thirty days, +but I will do the hardest kind of intellectual work for just as +near nothing as you can cipher it down—and I will be satisfied, too.</p> + +<p>Intellectual "work" is misnamed; it is a pleasure, a dissipation, +and is its own highest reward. The poorest paid architect, +engineer, general, author, sculptor, painter, lecturer, advocate, +legislator, actor, preacher, singer is constructively in heaven +when he is at work; and as for the musician with the fiddle-bow +in his hand who sits in the midst of a great orchestra with the +ebbing and flowing tides of divine sound washing over him—why, +certainly, he is at work, if you wish to call it that, but lord, +it's a sarcasm just the same. The law of work does seem utterly +unfair—but there it is, and nothing can change it: the higher +the pay in enjoyment the worker gets out of it, the higher shall +be his pay in cash, also. And it's also the very law of those +transparent swindles, transmissible nobility and kingship.</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="29-367.jpg (96K)" src="images/29-367.jpg" height="896" width="695"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<br><br><a name="c29"></a><br><br><center><h2>CHAPTER XXIX</h2></center><br><br> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="29-369.jpg (123K)" src="images/29-369.jpg" height="896" width="753"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>THE SMALLPOX HUT</p> + +<p>When we arrived at that hut at mid-afternoon, we saw no signs +of life about it. The field near by had been denuded of its crop +some time before, and had a skinned look, so exhaustively had +it been harvested and gleaned. Fences, sheds, everything had a +ruined look, and were eloquent of poverty. No animal was around +anywhere, no living thing in sight. The stillness was awful, it +was like the stillness of death. The cabin was a one-story one, +whose thatch was black with age, and ragged from lack of repair.</p> + +<p>The door stood a trifle ajar. We approached it stealthily—on tiptoe +and at half-breath—for that is the way one's feeling makes him do, +at such a time. The king knocked. We waited. No answer. Knocked +again. No answer. I pushed the door softly open and looked in. +I made out some dim forms, and a woman started up from the ground +and stared at me, as one does who is wakened from sleep. Presently +she found her voice:</p> + +<p>"Have mercy!" she pleaded. "All is taken, nothing is left."</p> + +<p>"I have not come to take anything, poor woman."</p> + +<p>"You are not a priest?"</p> + +<p>"No."</p> + +<p>"Nor come not from the lord of the manor?"</p> + +<p>"No, I am a stranger."</p> + +<p>"Oh, then, for the fear of God, who visits with misery and death +such as be harmless, tarry not here, but fly! This place is under +his curse—and his Church's."</p> + +<p>"Let me come in and help you—you are sick and in trouble."</p> + +<p>I was better used to the dim light now. I could see her hollow +eyes fixed upon me. I could see how emaciated she was.</p> + +<p>"I tell you the place is under the Church's ban. Save +yourself—and go, before some straggler see thee here, and report it."</p> + +<p>"Give yourself no trouble about me; I don't care anything for the +Church's curse. Let me help you."</p> + +<p>"Now all good spirits—if there be any such—bless thee for that +word. Would God I had a sup of water!—but hold, hold, forget +I said it, and fly; for there is that here that even he that +feareth not the Church must fear: this disease whereof we die. +Leave us, thou brave, good stranger, and take with thee such +whole and sincere blessing as them that be accursed can give."</p> + +<p>But before this I had picked up a wooden bowl and was rushing +past the king on my way to the brook. It was ten yards away. +When I got back and entered, the king was within, and was opening +the shutter that closed the window-hole, to let in air and light. +The place was full of a foul stench. I put the bowl to the woman's +lips, and as she gripped it with her eager talons the shutter came +open and a strong light flooded her face. Smallpox!</p> + +<p>I sprang to the king, and said in his ear:</p> + +<p>"Out of the door on the instant, sire! the woman is dying of that +disease that wasted the skirts of Camelot two years ago."</p> + +<p>He did not budge.</p> + +<p>"Of a truth I shall remain—and likewise help."</p> + +<p>I whispered again:</p> + +<p>"King, it must not be. You must go."</p> + +<p>"Ye mean well, and ye speak not unwisely. But it were shame that +a king should know fear, and shame that belted knight should +withhold his hand where be such as need succor. Peace, I will +not go. It is you who must go. The Church's ban is not upon me, +but it forbiddeth you to be here, and she will deal with you with +a heavy hand an word come to her of your trespass."</p> + +<p>It was a desperate place for him to be in, and might cost him his +life, but it was no use to argue with him. If he considered his +knightly honor at stake here, that was the end of argument; he +would stay, and nothing could prevent it; I was aware of that. +And so I dropped the subject. The woman spoke:</p> + +<p>"Fair sir, of your kindness will ye climb the ladder there, +and bring me news of what ye find? Be not afraid to report, +for times can come when even a mother's heart is past +breaking—being already broke."</p> + +<p>"Abide," said the king, "and give the woman to eat. I will go." +And he put down the knapsack.</p> + +<p>I turned to start, but the king had already started. He halted, +and looked down upon a man who lay in a dim light, and had not +noticed us thus far, or spoken.</p> + +<p>"Is it your husband?" the king asked.</p> + +<p>"Yes."</p> + +<p>"Is he asleep?"</p> + +<p>"God be thanked for that one charity, yes—these three hours. +Where shall I pay to the full, my gratitude! for my heart is +bursting with it for that sleep he sleepeth now."</p> + +<p>I said:</p> + +<p>"We will be careful. We will not wake him."</p> + +<p>"Ah, no, that ye will not, for he is dead."</p> + +<p>"Dead?"</p> + +<p>"Yes, what triumph it is to know it! None can harm him, none +insult him more. He is in heaven now, and happy; or if not there, +he bides in hell and is content; for in that place he will find +neither abbot nor yet bishop. We were boy and girl together; we +were man and wife these five and twenty years, and never separated +till this day. Think how long that is to love and suffer together. +This morning was he out of his mind, and in his fancy we were +boy and girl again and wandering in the happy fields; and so in +that innocent glad converse wandered he far and farther, still +lightly gossiping, and entered into those other fields we know +not of, and was shut away from mortal sight. And so there was +no parting, for in his fancy I went with him; he knew not but +I went with him, my hand in his—my young soft hand, not this +withered claw. Ah, yes, to go, and know it not; to separate and +know it not; how could one go peace—fuller than that? It was +his reward for a cruel life patiently borne."</p> + +<p>There was a slight noise from the direction of the dim corner where +the ladder was. It was the king descending. I could see that he +was bearing something in one arm, and assisting himself with the +other. He came forward into the light; upon his breast lay a +slender girl of fifteen. She was but half conscious; she was dying +of smallpox. Here was heroism at its last and loftiest possibility, +its utmost summit; this was challenging death in the open field +unarmed, with all the odds against the challenger, no reward set +upon the contest, and no admiring world in silks and cloth of gold +to gaze and applaud; and yet the king's bearing was as serenely +brave as it had always been in those cheaper contests where knight +meets knight in equal fight and clothed in protecting steel. He +was great now; sublimely great. The rude statues of his ancestors +in his palace should have an addition—I would see to that; and it +would not be a mailed king killing a giant or a dragon, like the +rest, it would be a king in commoner's garb bearing death in his +arms that a peasant mother might look her last upon her child and +be comforted.</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="29-373.jpg (155K)" src="images/29-373.jpg" height="1005" width="748"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>He laid the girl down by her mother, who poured out endearments +and caresses from an overflowing heart, and one could detect a +flickering faint light of response in the child's eyes, but that +was all. The mother hung over her, kissing her, petting her, and +imploring her to speak, but the lips only moved and no sound came. +I snatched my liquor flask from my knapsack, but the woman forbade +me, and said:</p> + +<p>"No—she does not suffer; it is better so. It might bring her back +to life. None that be so good and kind as ye are would do her +that cruel hurt. For look you—what is left to live for? Her +brothers are gone, her father is gone, her mother goeth, the +Church's curse is upon her, and none may shelter or befriend her +even though she lay perishing in the road. She is desolate. I have +not asked you, good heart, if her sister be still on live, here +overhead; I had no need; ye had gone back, else, and not left +the poor thing forsaken—"</p> + +<p>"She lieth at peace," interrupted the king, in a subdued voice.</p> + +<p>"I would not change it. How rich is this day in happiness! Ah, +my Annis, thou shalt join thy sister soon—thou'rt on thy way, +and these be merciful friends that will not hinder."</p> + +<p>And so she fell to murmuring and cooing over the girl again, and +softly stroking her face and hair, and kissing her and calling her +by endearing names; but there was scarcely sign of response now +in the glazing eyes. I saw tears well from the king's eyes, and +trickle down his face. The woman noticed them, too, and said:</p> + +<p>"Ah, I know that sign: thou'st a wife at home, poor soul, and +you and she have gone hungry to bed, many's the time, that the +little ones might have your crust; you know what poverty is, and +the daily insults of your betters, and the heavy hand of the Church +and the king."</p> + +<p>The king winced under this accidental home-shot, but kept still; +he was learning his part; and he was playing it well, too, for +a pretty dull beginner. I struck up a diversion. I offered the +woman food and liquor, but she refused both. She would allow +nothing to come between her and the release of death. Then I slipped +away and brought the dead child from aloft, and laid it by her. +This broke her down again, and there was another scene that was +full of heartbreak. By and by I made another diversion, and beguiled +her to sketch her story.</p> + +<p>"Ye know it well yourselves, having suffered it—for truly none +of our condition in Britain escape it. It is the old, weary tale. +We fought and struggled and succeeded; meaning by success, that +we lived and did not die; more than that is not to be claimed. No +troubles came that we could not outlive, till this year brought +them; then came they all at once, as one might say, and overwhelmed +us. Years ago the lord of the manor planted certain fruit trees on +our farm; in the best part of it, too—a grievous wrong and shame—"</p> + +<p>"But it was his right," interrupted the king.</p> + +<p>"None denieth that, indeed; an the law mean anything, what is +the lord's is his, and what is mine is his also. Our farm was +ours by lease, therefore 'twas likewise his, to do with it as he +would. Some little time ago, three of those trees were found hewn +down. Our three grown sons ran frightened to report the crime. +Well, in his lordship's dungeon there they lie, who saith there +shall they lie and rot till they confess. They have naught to +confess, being innocent, wherefore there will they remain until +they die. + + +</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="29-375.jpg (120K)" src="images/29-375.jpg" height="665" width="723"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p> + +Ye know that right well, I ween. Think how this left us; +a man, a woman and two children, to gather a crop that was planted +by so much greater force, yes, and protect it night and day from +pigeons and prowling animals that be sacred and must not be hurt +by any of our sort. When my lord's crop was nearly ready for +the harvest, so also was ours; when his bell rang to call us to +his fields to harvest his crop for nothing, he would not allow that +I and my two girls should count for our three captive sons, but +for only two of them; so, for the lacking one were we daily fined. +All this time our own crop was perishing through neglect; and so +both the priest and his lordship fined us because their shares +of it were suffering through damage. In the end the fines ate up +our crop—and they took it all; they took it all and made us harvest +it for them, without pay or food, and we starving. Then the worst +came when I, being out of my mind with hunger and loss of my boys, +and grief to see my husband and my little maids in rags and misery +and despair, uttered a deep blasphemy—oh! a thousand of +them!—against the Church and the Church's ways. It was ten days ago. +I had fallen sick with this disease, and it was to the priest +I said the words, for he was come to chide me for lack of due +humility under the chastening hand of God. He carried my trespass +to his betters; I was stubborn; wherefore, presently upon my head +and upon all heads that were dear to me, fell the curse of Rome.</p> + +<p>"Since that day we are avoided, shunned with horror. None has +come near this hut to know whether we live or not. The rest of us +were taken down. Then I roused me and got up, as wife and mother +will. It was little they could have eaten in any case; it was +less than little they had to eat. But there was water, and I gave +them that. How they craved it! and how they blessed it! But the +end came yesterday; my strength broke down. Yesterday was the +last time I ever saw my husband and this youngest child alive. +I have lain here all these hours—these ages, ye may say—listening, +listening for any sound up there that—"</p> + +<p>She gave a sharp quick glance at her eldest daughter, then cried +out, "Oh, my darling!" and feebly gathered the stiffening form +to her sheltering arms. She had recognized the death-rattle.</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="30-377.jpg (91K)" src="images/30-377.jpg" height="963" width="594"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<br><br><a name="c30"></a><br><br><center><h2>CHAPTER XXX</h2></center><br><br> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="30-379.jpg (133K)" src="images/30-379.jpg" height="902" width="748"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>THE TRAGEDY OF THE MANOR-HOUSE</p> + +<p>At midnight all was over, and we sat in the presence of four +corpses. We covered them with such rags as we could find, and +started away, fastening the door behind us. Their home must be +these people's grave, for they could not have Christian burial, +or be admitted to consecrated ground. They were as dogs, wild +beasts, lepers, and no soul that valued its hope of eternal life +would throw it away by meddling in any sort with these rebuked and +smitten outcasts.</p> + +<p>We had not moved four steps when I caught a sound as of footsteps +upon gravel. My heart flew to my throat. We must not be seen +coming from that house. I plucked at the king's robe and we drew +back and took shelter behind the corner of the cabin.</p> + +<p>"Now we are safe," I said, "but it was a close call—so to speak. +If the night had been lighter he might have seen us, no doubt, +he seemed to be so near."</p> + +<p>"Mayhap it is but a beast and not a man at all."</p> + +<p>"True. But man or beast, it will be wise to stay here a minute +and let it get by and out of the way."</p> + +<p>"Hark! It cometh hither."</p> + +<p>True again. The step was coming toward us—straight toward the hut. +It must be a beast, then, and we might as well have saved our +trepidation. I was going to step out, but the king laid his hand +upon my arm. There was a moment of silence, then we heard a soft +knock on the cabin door. It made me shiver. Presently the knock +was repeated, and then we heard these words in a guarded voice:</p> + +<p>"Mother! Father! Open—we have got free, and we bring news to +pale your cheeks but glad your hearts; and we may not tarry, but +must fly! And—but they answer not. Mother! father!—"</p> + +<p>I drew the king toward the other end of the hut and whispered:</p> + +<p>"Come—now we can get to the road."</p> + +<p>The king hesitated, was going to demur; but just then we heard +the door give way, and knew that those desolate men were in the +presence of their dead.</p> + +<p>"Come, my liege! in a moment they will strike a light, and then +will follow that which it would break your heart to hear."</p> + +<p>He did not hesitate this time. The moment we were in the road +I ran; and after a moment he threw dignity aside and followed. +I did not want to think of what was happening in the hut—I couldn't +bear it; I wanted to drive it out of my mind; so I struck into the +first subject that lay under that one in my mind:</p> + +<p>"I have had the disease those people died of, and so have nothing +to fear; but if you have not had it also—"</p> + +<p>He broke in upon me to say he was in trouble, and it was his +conscience that was troubling him:</p> + +<p>"These young men have got free, they say—but <i>how</i> ? It is not +likely that their lord hath set them free."</p> + +<p>"Oh, no, I make no doubt they escaped."</p> + +<p>"That is my trouble; I have a fear that this is so, and your +suspicion doth confirm it, you having the same fear."</p> + +<p>"I should not call it by that name though. I do suspect that they +escaped, but if they did, I am not sorry, certainly."</p> + +<p>"I am not sorry, I <i>think</i>—but—"</p> + +<p>"What is it? What is there for one to be troubled about?"</p> + +<p>"<i>If</i> they did escape, then are we bound in duty to lay hands upon +them and deliver them again to their lord; for it is not seemly +that one of his quality should suffer a so insolent and high-handed +outrage from persons of their base degree."</p> + +<p>There it was again. He could see only one side of it. He was +born so, educated so, his veins were full of ancestral blood that +was rotten with this sort of unconscious brutality, brought down +by inheritance from a long procession of hearts that had each done +its share toward poisoning the stream. To imprison these men +without proof, and starve their kindred, was no harm, for they were +merely peasants and subject to the will and pleasure of their lord, +no matter what fearful form it might take; but for these men to +break out of unjust captivity was insult and outrage, and a thing +not to be countenanced by any conscientious person who knew his +duty to his sacred caste.</p> + +<p>I worked more than half an hour before I got him to change the +subject—and even then an outside matter did it for me. This was +a something which caught our eyes as we struck the summit of a +small hill—a red glow, a good way off.</p> + +<p>"That's a fire," said I.</p> + +<p>Fires interested me considerably, because I was getting a good +deal of an insurance business started, and was also training some +horses and building some steam fire-engines, with an eye to a paid +fire department by and by. The priests opposed both my fire and +life insurance, on the ground that it was an insolent attempt to +hinder the decrees of God; and if you pointed out that they did not +hinder the decrees in the least, but only modified the hard +consequences of them if you took out policies and had luck, they +retorted that that was gambling against the decrees of God, and was +just as bad. So they managed to damage those industries more +or less, but I got even on my Accident business. As a rule, a knight +is a lummox, and some times even a labrick, and hence open to pretty +poor arguments when they come glibly from a superstition-monger, +but even <i>he</i> could see the practical side of a thing once in a while; +and so of late you couldn't clean up a tournament and pile the +result without finding one of my accident-tickets in every helmet.</p> + + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="30-382.jpg (88K)" src="images/30-382.jpg" height="555" width="704"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>We stood there awhile, in the thick darkness and stillness, looking +toward the red blur in the distance, and trying to make out the +meaning of a far-away murmur that rose and fell fitfully on the +night. Sometimes it swelled up and for a moment seemed less +remote; but when we were hopefully expecting it to betray its cause +and nature, it dulled and sank again, carrying its mystery with it. +We started down the hill in its direction, and the winding road +plunged us at once into almost solid darkness—darkness that was +packed and crammed in between two tall forest walls. We groped +along down for half a mile, perhaps, that murmur growing more and +more distinct all the time. The coming storm threatening more and +more, with now and then a little shiver of wind, a faint show of +lightning, and dull grumblings of distant thunder. I was in the +lead. I ran against something—a soft heavy something which gave, +slightly, to the impulse of my weight; at the same moment the +lightning glared out, and within a foot of my face was the writhing +face of a man who was hanging from the limb of a tree! That is, +it seemed to be writhing, but it was not. It was a grewsome sight. +Straightway there was an ear-splitting explosion of thunder, and +the bottom of heaven fell out; the rain poured down in a deluge. +No matter, we must try to cut this man down, on the chance that +there might be life in him yet, mustn't we? The lightning came +quick and sharp now, and the place was alternately noonday and +midnight. One moment the man would be hanging before me in an +intense light, and the next he was blotted out again in the darkness. +I told the king we must cut him down. The king at once objected.</p> + +<p>"If he hanged himself, he was willing to lose him property to +his lord; so let him be. If others hanged him, belike they had +the right—let him hang."</p> + +<p>"But—"</p> + +<p>"But me no buts, but even leave him as he is. And for yet another +reason. When the lightning cometh again—there, look abroad."</p> + +<p>Two others hanging, within fifty yards of us!</p> + +<p>"It is not weather meet for doing useless courtesies unto dead folk. +They are past thanking you. Come—it is unprofitable to tarry here."</p> + +<p>There was reason in what he said, so we moved on. Within the next +mile we counted six more hanging forms by the blaze of the lightning, +and altogether it was a grisly excursion. That murmur was a murmur +no longer, it was a roar; a roar of men's voices. A man came flying +by now, dimly through the darkness, and other men chasing him. +They disappeared. Presently another case of the kind occurred, +and then another and another. Then a sudden turn of the road +brought us in sight of that fire—it was a large manor-house, and +little or nothing was left of it—and everywhere men were flying +and other men raging after them in pursuit.</p> + +<p>I warned the king that this was not a safe place for strangers. +We would better get away from the light, until matters should +improve. We stepped back a little, and hid in the edge of the +wood. From this hiding-place we saw both men and women hunted +by the mob. The fearful work went on until nearly dawn. Then, +the fire being out and the storm spent, the voices and flying +footsteps presently ceased, and darkness and stillness reigned again.</p> + +<p>We ventured out, and hurried cautiously away; and although we were +worn out and sleepy, we kept on until we had put this place some +miles behind us. Then we asked hospitality at the hut of a charcoal +burner, and got what was to be had. A woman was up and about, but +the man was still asleep, on a straw shake-down, on the clay floor. +The woman seemed uneasy until I explained that we were travelers +and had lost our way and been wandering in the woods all night. +She became talkative, then, and asked if we had heard of the +terrible goings-on at the manor-house of Abblasoure. Yes, we had +heard of them, but what we wanted now was rest and sleep. The +king broke in:</p> + +<p>"Sell us the house and take yourselves away, for we be perilous +company, being late come from people that died of the Spotted Death."</p> + +<p>It was good of him, but unnecessary. One of the commonest decorations +of the nation was the waffle-iron face. I had early noticed that +the woman and her husband were both so decorated. She made us +entirely welcome, and had no fears; and plainly she was immensely +impressed by the king's proposition; for, of course, it was a good +deal of an event in her life to run across a person of the king's +humble appearance who was ready to buy a man's house for the sake +of a night's lodging. It gave her a large respect for us, and she +strained the lean possibilities of her hovel to the utmost to make +us comfortable.</p> + +<p>We slept till far into the afternoon, and then got up hungry enough to +make cotter fare quite palatable to the king, the more particularly +as it was scant in quantity. And also in variety; it consisted +solely of onions, salt, and the national black bread made out of +horse-feed. The woman told us about the affair of the evening +before. At ten or eleven at night, when everybody was in bed, +the manor-house burst into flames. The country-side swarmed to +the rescue, and the family were saved, with one exception, the +master. He did not appear. Everybody was frantic over this loss, +and two brave yeomen sacrificed their lives in ransacking the +burning house seeking that valuable personage. But after a while +he was found—what was left of him—which was his corpse. It was +in a copse three hundred yards away, bound, gagged, stabbed in a +dozen places.</p> + +<p>Who had done this? Suspicion fell upon a humble family in the +neighborhood who had been lately treated with peculiar harshness +by the baron; and from these people the suspicion easily extended +itself to their relatives and familiars. A suspicion was enough; +my lord's liveried retainers proclaimed an instant crusade against +these people, and were promptly joined by the community in general. +The woman's husband had been active with the mob, and had not +returned home until nearly dawn. He was gone now to find out +what the general result had been. While we were still talking he +came back from his quest. His report was revolting enough. Eighteen +persons hanged or butchered, and two yeomen and thirteen prisoners +lost in the fire.</p> + +<p>"And how many prisoners were there altogether in the vaults?"</p> + +<p>"Thirteen."</p> + +<p>"Then every one of them was lost?"</p> + +<p>"Yes, all."</p> + +<p>"But the people arrived in time to save the family; how is it they +could save none of the prisoners?"</p> + +<p>The man looked puzzled, and said:</p> + +<p>"Would one unlock the vaults at such a time? Marry, some would +have escaped."</p> + +<p>"Then you mean that nobody <i>did</i> unlock them?"</p> + +<p>"None went near them, either to lock or unlock. It standeth to +reason that the bolts were fast; wherefore it was only needful +to establish a watch, so that if any broke the bonds he might not +escape, but be taken. None were taken."</p> + +<p>"Natheless, three did escape," said the king, "and ye will do well +to publish it and set justice upon their track, for these murthered +the baron and fired the house."</p> + +<p>I was just expecting he would come out with that. For a moment +the man and his wife showed an eager interest in this news and +an impatience to go out and spread it; then a sudden something +else betrayed itself in their faces, and they began to ask questions. +I answered the questions myself, and narrowly watched the effects +produced. I was soon satisfied that the knowledge of who these +three prisoners were had somehow changed the atmosphere; that +our hosts' continued eagerness to go and spread the news was now +only pretended and not real. The king did not notice the change, +and I was glad of that. I worked the conversation around toward +other details of the night's proceedings, and noted that these +people were relieved to have it take that direction.</p> + +<p>The painful thing observable about all this business was the +alacrity with which this oppressed community had turned their +cruel hands against their own class in the interest of the common +oppressor. This man and woman seemed to feel that in a quarrel +between a person of their own class and his lord, it was the natural +and proper and rightful thing for that poor devil's whole caste +to side with the master and fight his battle for him, without ever +stopping to inquire into the rights or wrongs of the matter. This +man had been out helping to hang his neighbors, and had done his +work with zeal, and yet was aware that there was nothing against +them but a mere suspicion, with nothing back of it describable +as evidence, still neither he nor his wife seemed to see anything +horrible about it.</p> + +<p>This was depressing—to a man with the dream of a republic in his +head. It reminded me of a time thirteen centuries away, when +the "poor whites" of our South who were always despised and +frequently insulted by the slave-lords around them, and who owed +their base condition simply to the presence of slavery in their +midst, were yet pusillanimously ready to side with the slave-lords +in all political moves for the upholding and perpetuating of +slavery, and did also finally shoulder their muskets and pour out +their lives in an effort to prevent the destruction of that very +institution which degraded them. And there was only one redeeming +feature connected with that pitiful piece of history; and that was, +that secretly the "poor white" did detest the slave-lord, and did +feel his own shame. That feeling was not brought to the surface, +but the fact that it was there and could have been brought out, +under favoring circumstances, was something—in fact, it was enough; +for it showed that a man is at bottom a man, after all, even if it +doesn't show on the outside.</p> + +<p>Well, as it turned out, this charcoal burner was just the twin of +the Southern "poor white" of the far future. The king presently +showed impatience, and said:</p> + +<p>"An ye prattle here all the day, justice will miscarry. Think ye +the criminals will abide in their father's house? They are fleeing, +they are not waiting. You should look to it that a party of horse +be set upon their track."</p> + +<p>The woman paled slightly, but quite perceptibly, and the man looked +flustered and irresolute. I said:</p> + +<p>"Come, friend, I will walk a little way with you, and explain which +direction I think they would try to take. If they were merely +resisters of the gabelle or some kindred absurdity I would try +to protect them from capture; but when men murder a person of +high degree and likewise burn his house, that is another matter."</p> + +<p>The last remark was for the king—to quiet him. On the road +the man pulled his resolution together, and began the march with +a steady gait, but there was no eagerness in it. By and by I said:</p> + +<p>"What relation were these men to you—cousins?"</p> + +<p>He turned as white as his layer of charcoal would let him, and +stopped, trembling.</p> + +<p>"Ah, my God, how know ye that?"</p> + +<p>"I didn't know it; it was a chance guess."</p> + +<p>"Poor lads, they are lost. And good lads they were, too."</p> + +<p>"Were you actually going yonder to tell on them?"</p> + +<p>He didn't quite know how to take that; but he said, hesitatingly:</p> + +<p>"Ye-s."</p> + +<p>"Then I think you are a damned scoundrel!"</p> + +<p>It made him as glad as if I had called him an angel.</p> + +<p>"Say the good words again, brother! for surely ye mean that ye +would not betray me an I failed of my duty."</p> + +<p>"Duty? There is no duty in the matter, except the duty to keep +still and let those men get away. They've done a righteous deed."</p> + +<p>He looked pleased; pleased, and touched with apprehension at the +same time. He looked up and down the road to see that no one +was coming, and then said in a cautious voice:</p> + +<p>"From what land come you, brother, that you speak such perilous +words, and seem not to be afraid?"</p> + +<p>"They are not perilous words when spoken to one of my own caste, +I take it. You would not tell anybody I said them?"</p> + +<p>"I? I would be drawn asunder by wild horses first."</p> + +<p>"Well, then, let me say my say. I have no fears of your repeating +it. I think devil's work has been done last night upon those +innocent poor people. That old baron got only what he deserved. +If I had my way, all his kind should have the same luck."</p> + +<p>Fear and depression vanished from the man's manner, and gratefulness +and a brave animation took their place:</p> + +<p>"Even though you be a spy, and your words a trap for my undoing, +yet are they such refreshment that to hear them again and others +like to them, I would go to the gallows happy, as having had one +good feast at least in a starved life. And I will say my say now, +and ye may report it if ye be so minded. I helped to hang my +neighbors for that it were peril to my own life to show lack of +zeal in the master's cause; the others helped for none other reason. +All rejoice to-day that he is dead, but all do go about seemingly +sorrowing, and shedding the hypocrite's tear, for in that lies +safety. I have said the words, I have said the words! the only +ones that have ever tasted good in my mouth, and the reward of +that taste is sufficient. Lead on, an ye will, be it even to the +scaffold, for I am ready."</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="30-389.jpg (101K)" src="images/30-389.jpg" height="791" width="693"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>There it was, you see. A man is a man, at bottom. Whole ages +of abuse and oppression cannot crush the manhood clear out of him. +Whoever thinks it a mistake is himself mistaken. Yes, there is +plenty good enough material for a republic in the most degraded +people that ever existed—even the Russians; plenty of manhood +in them—even in the Germans—if one could but force it out of +its timid and suspicious privacy, to overthrow and trample in the +mud any throne that ever was set up and any nobility that ever +supported it. We should see certain things yet, let us hope and +believe. First, a modified monarchy, till Arthur's days were done, +then the destruction of the throne, nobility abolished, every +member of it bound out to some useful trade, universal suffrage +instituted, and the whole government placed in the hands of the +men and women of the nation there to remain. Yes, there was no +occasion to give up my dream yet a while.</p> + + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="31-393.jpg (106K)" src="images/31-393.jpg" height="948" width="657"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<br><br><a name="c31"></a><br><br><center><h2>CHAPTER XXXI</h2></center><br><br> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="31-395.jpg (133K)" src="images/31-395.jpg" height="909" width="747"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>MARCO</p> + +<p>We strolled along in a sufficiently indolent fashion now, and +talked. We must dispose of about the amount of time it ought +to take to go to the little hamlet of Abblasoure and put justice +on the track of those murderers and get back home again. And +meantime I had an auxiliary interest which had never paled yet, +never lost its novelty for me since I had been in Arthur's kingdom: +the behavior—born of nice and exact subdivisions of caste—of chance +passers-by toward each other. Toward the shaven monk who trudged +along with his cowl tilted back and the sweat washing down his +fat jowls, the coal-burner was deeply reverent; to the gentleman +he was abject; with the small farmer and the free mechanic he was +cordial and gossipy; and when a slave passed by with a countenance +respectfully lowered, this chap's nose was in the air—he couldn't +even see him. Well, there are times when one would like to hang +the whole human race and finish the farce.</p> + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="31-397.jpg (84K)" src="images/31-397.jpg" height="580" width="691"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + + +<center> +<img alt="31-403.jpg (176K)" src="images/31-403.jpg" height="706" width="942"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>Presently we struck an incident. A small mob of half-naked boys +and girls came tearing out of the woods, scared and shrieking. +The eldest among them were not more than twelve or fourteen years +old. They implored help, but they were so beside themselves that +we couldn't make out what the matter was. However, we plunged +into the wood, they skurrying in the lead, and the trouble was +quickly revealed: they had hanged a little fellow with a bark rope, +and he was kicking and struggling, in the process of choking to +death. We rescued him, and fetched him around. It was some more +human nature; the admiring little folk imitating their elders; +they were playing mob, and had achieved a success which promised +to be a good deal more serious than they had bargained for.</p> + +<p>It was not a dull excursion for me. I managed to put in the time +very well. I made various acquaintanceships, and in my quality +of stranger was able to ask as many questions as I wanted to. +A thing which naturally interested me, as a statesman, was the +matter of wages. I picked up what I could under that head during +the afternoon. A man who hasn't had much experience, and doesn't +think, is apt to measure a nation's prosperity or lack of prosperity +by the mere size of the prevailing wages; if the wages be high, the +nation is prosperous; if low, it isn't. Which is an error. It +isn't what sum you get, it's how much you can buy with it, that's +the important thing; and it's that that tells whether your wages +are high in fact or only high in name. I could remember how it +was in the time of our great civil war in the nineteenth century. +In the North a carpenter got three dollars a day, gold valuation; +in the South he got fifty—payable in Confederate shinplasters +worth a dollar a bushel. In the North a suit of overalls cost +three dollars—a day's wages; in the South it cost +seventy-five—which was two days' wages. Other things were in proportion. +Consequently, wages were twice as high in the North as they were +in the South, because the one wage had that much more purchasing +power than the other had.</p> + +<p>Yes, I made various acquaintances in the hamlet and a thing that +gratified me a good deal was to find our new coins in +circulation—lots of milrays, lots of mills, lots of cents, a good many nickels, +and some silver; all this among the artisans and commonalty +generally; yes, and even some gold—but that was at the bank, +that is to say, the goldsmith's. I dropped in there while Marco, +the son of Marco, was haggling with a shopkeeper over a quarter +of a pound of salt, and asked for change for a twenty-dollar gold +piece. They furnished it—that is, after they had chewed the piece, +and rung it on the counter, and tried acid on it, and asked me +where I got it, and who I was, and where I was from, and where +I was going to, and when I expected to get there, and perhaps +a couple of hundred more questions; and when they got aground, +I went right on and furnished them a lot of information voluntarily; +told them I owned a dog, and his name was Watch, and my first wife +was a Free Will Baptist, and her grandfather was a Prohibitionist, +and I used to know a man who had two thumbs on each hand and a wart +on the inside of his upper lip, and died in the hope of a glorious +resurrection, and so on, and so on, and so on, till even that +hungry village questioner began to look satisfied, and also a shade +put out; but he had to respect a man of my financial strength, +and so he didn't give me any lip, but I noticed he took it out of +his underlings, which was a perfectly natural thing to do. Yes, +they changed my twenty, but I judged it strained the bank a little, +which was a thing to be expected, for it was the same as walking +into a paltry village store in the nineteenth century and requiring +the boss of it to change a two thousand-dollar bill for you all +of a sudden. He could do it, maybe; but at the same time he +would wonder how a small farmer happened to be carrying so much +money around in his pocket; which was probably this goldsmith's +thought, too; for he followed me to the door and stood there gazing +after me with reverent admiration.</p> + +<p>Our new money was not only handsomely circulating, but its language +was already glibly in use; that is to say, people had dropped +the names of the former moneys, and spoke of things as being worth +so many dollars or cents or mills or milrays now. It was very +gratifying. We were progressing, that was sure.</p> + +<p>I got to know several master mechanics, but about the most interesting +fellow among them was the blacksmith, Dowley. He was a live man +and a brisk talker, and had two journeymen and three apprentices, +and was doing a raging business. In fact, he was getting rich, +hand over fist, and was vastly respected. Marco was very proud of +having such a man for a friend. He had taken me there ostensibly +to let me see the big establishment which bought so much of his +charcoal, but really to let me see what easy and almost familiar +terms he was on with this great man. Dowley and I fraternized +at once; I had had just such picked men, splendid fellows, under +me in the Colt Arms Factory. I was bound to see more of him, so +I invited him to come out to Marco's Sunday, and dine with us. +Marco was appalled, and held his breath; and when the grandee +accepted, he was so grateful that he almost forgot to be astonished +at the condescension.</p> + +<p>Marco's joy was exuberant—but only for a moment; then he grew +thoughtful, then sad; and when he heard me tell Dowley I should +have Dickon, the boss mason, and Smug, the boss wheelwright, out +there, too, the coal-dust on his face turned to chalk, and he lost +his grip. But I knew what was the matter with him; it was the +expense. He saw ruin before him; he judged that his financial +days were numbered. However, on our way to invite the others, +I said:</p> + +<p>"You must allow me to have these friends come; and you must also +allow me to pay the costs."</p> + +<p>His face cleared, and he said with spirit:</p> + +<p>"But not all of it, not all of it. Ye cannot well bear a burden +like to this alone."</p> + +<p>I stopped him, and said:</p> + +<p>"Now let's understand each other on the spot, old friend. I am +only a farm bailiff, it is true; but I am not poor, nevertheless. +I have been very fortunate this year—you would be astonished +to know how I have thriven. I tell you the honest truth when I say +I could squander away as many as a dozen feasts like this and never +care <i>that</i> for the expense!" and I snapped my fingers. I could +see myself rise a foot at a time in Marco's estimation, and when +I fetched out those last words I was become a very tower for style +and altitude. "So you see, you must let me have my way. You +can't contribute a cent to this orgy, that's <i>settled</i> ."</p> + +<p>"It's grand and good of you—"</p> + +<p>"No, it isn't. You've opened your house to Jones and me in the +most generous way; Jones was remarking upon it to-day, just before +you came back from the village; for although he wouldn't be likely +to say such a thing to you—because Jones isn't a talker, and is +diffident in society—he has a good heart and a grateful, and +knows how to appreciate it when he is well treated; yes, you and +your wife have been very hospitable toward us—"</p> + + +<br><br><br><br> +<center> +<img alt="31-400.jpg (157K)" src="images/31-400.jpg" height="1021" width="737"> +</center> +<br><br><br><br> + +<p>"Ah, brother, 'tis nothing—<i>such</i> hospitality!"</p> + +<p>"But it <i>is</i> something; the best a man has, freely given, is always +something, and is as good as a prince can do, and ranks right +along beside it—for even a prince can but do his best. And so +we'll shop around and get up this layout now, and don't you worry +about the expense. I'm one of the worst spendthrifts that ever +was born. Why, do you know, sometimes in a single week I +spend—but never mind about that—you'd never believe it anyway."</p> + +<p>And so we went gadding along, dropping in here and there, pricing +things, and gossiping with the shopkeepers about the riot, and now +and then running across pathetic reminders of it, in the persons of +shunned and tearful and houseless remnants of families whose homes +had been taken from them and their parents butchered or hanged. +The raiment of Marco and his wife was of coarse tow-linen and +linsey-woolsey respectively, and resembled township maps, it being +made up pretty exclusively of patches which had been added, township +by township, in the course of five or six years, until hardly a +hand's-breadth of the original garments was surviving and present. +Now I wanted to fit these people out with new suits, on account of +that swell company, and I didn't know just how to get at +it—with delicacy, until at last it struck me that as I had already +been liberal in inventing wordy gratitude for the king, it would +be just the thing to back it up with evidence of a substantial +sort; so I said:</p> + +<p>"And Marco, there's another thing which you must permit—out of +kindness for Jones—because you wouldn't want to offend him. +He was very anxious to testify his appreciation in some way, but +he is so diffident he couldn't venture it himself, and so he begged +me to buy some little things and give them to you and Dame Phyllis +and let him pay for them without your ever knowing they came from +him—you know how a delicate person feels about that sort of +thing—and so I said I would, and we would keep mum. Well, his idea +was, a new outfit of clothes for you both—"</p> + +<p>"Oh, it is wastefulness! It may not be, brother, it may not be. +Consider the vastness of the sum—"</p> + +<p>"Hang the vastness of the sum! Try to keep quiet for a moment, +and see how it would seem; a body can't get in a word edgeways, +you talk so much. You ought to cure that, Marco; it isn't good +form, you know, and it will grow on you if you don't check it. +Yes, we'll step in here now and price this man's stuff—and don't +forget to remember to not let on to Jones that you know he had +anything to do with it. You can't think how curiously sensitive +and proud he is. He's a farmer—pretty fairly well-to-do +farmer—an I'm his bailiff; <i>but</i>—the imagination of that man! Why, +sometimes when he forgets himself and gets to blowing off, you'd +think he was one of the swells of the earth; and you might listen +to him a hundred years and never take him for a farmer—especially if +he talked agriculture. He <i>thinks</i> he's a Sheol of a farmer; thinks +he's old Grayback from Wayback; but between you and me privately +he don't know as much about farming as he does about running +a kingdom—still, whatever he talks about, you want to drop your +underjaw and listen, the same as if you had never heard such +incredible wisdom in all your life before, and were afraid you +might die before you got enough of it. That will please Jones."</p> + +<p>It tickled Marco to the marrow to hear about such an odd character; +but it also prepared him for accidents; and in my experience when +you travel with a king who is letting on to be something else and +can't remember it more than about half the time, you can't take +too many precautions.</p> + +<p>This was the best store we had come across yet; it had everything +in it, in small quantities, from anvils and drygoods all the way +down to fish and pinchbeck jewelry. I concluded I would bunch +my whole invoice right here, and not go pricing around any more. +So I got rid of Marco, by sending him off to invite the mason and +the wheelwright, which left the field free to me. For I never care +to do a thing in a quiet way; it's got to be theatrical or I don't +take any interest in it. I showed up money enough, in a careless +way, to corral the shopkeeper's respect, and then I wrote down +a list of the things I wanted, and handed it to him to see if he +could read it. He could, and was proud to show that he could. +He said he had been educated by a priest, and could both read +and write. He ran it through, and remarked with satisfaction that +it was a pretty heavy bill. Well, and so it was, for a little +concern like that. I was not only providing a swell dinner, but +some odds and ends of extras. I ordered that the things be carted +out and delivered at the dwelling of Marco, the son of Marco, +by Saturday evening, and send me the bill at dinner-time Sunday. +He said I could depend upon his promptness and exactitude, it was +the rule of the house. He also observed that he would throw in +a couple of miller-guns for the Marcos gratis—that everybody +was using them now. He had a mighty opinion of that clever +device. I said:</p> + +<p>"And please fill them up to the middle mark, too; and add that +to the bill."</p> + +<p>He would, with pleasure. He filled them, and I took them with +me. I couldn't venture to tell him that the miller-gun was a +little invention of my own, and that I had officially ordered that +every shopkeeper in the kingdom keep them on hand and sell them +at government price—which was the merest trifle, and the shopkeeper +got that, not the government. We furnished them for nothing.</p> + +<p>The king had hardly missed us when we got back at nightfall. He +had early dropped again into his dream of a grand invasion of Gaul +with the whole strength of his kingdom at his back, and the afternoon +had slipped away without his ever coming to himself again.</p> + + + + +<br> +<br> + + + + + + + + + + +<pre> + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's +Court, Part 6., by Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONNECTICUT YANKEE *** + +***** This file should be named 7247-h.htm or 7247-h.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/7/2/4/7247/ + +Produced by David Widger + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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Project Gutenberg EBook of A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's +Court, Part 6., by Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court, Part 6. + +Author: Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) + +Release Date: July 6, 2004 [EBook #7247] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONNECTICUT YANKEE *** + + + + +Produced by David Widger + + + + + + A CONNECTICUT YANKEE IN KING ARTHUR'S COURT + + by + + MARK TWAIN + (Samuel L. Clemens) + + Part 6. + + + +CHAPTER XXVII + +THE YANKEE AND THE KING TRAVEL INCOGNITO + +About bedtime I took the king to my private quarters to cut his +hair and help him get the hang of the lowly raiment he was to wear. +The high classes wore their hair banged across the forehead but +hanging to the shoulders the rest of the way around, whereas the +lowest ranks of commoners were banged fore and aft both; the slaves +were bangless, and allowed their hair free growth. So I inverted +a bowl over his head and cut away all the locks that hung below it. +I also trimmed his whiskers and mustache until they were only +about a half-inch long; and tried to do it inartistically, and +succeeded. It was a villainous disfigurement. When he got his +lubberly sandals on, and his long robe of coarse brown linen cloth, +which hung straight from his neck to his ankle-bones, he was no +longer the comeliest man in his kingdom, but one of the unhandsomest +and most commonplace and unattractive. We were dressed and barbered +alike, and could pass for small farmers, or farm bailiffs, or +shepherds, or carters; yes, or for village artisans, if we chose, +our costume being in effect universal among the poor, because of +its strength and cheapness. I don't mean that it was really cheap +to a very poor person, but I do mean that it was the cheapest +material there was for male attire--manufactured material, you +understand. + +We slipped away an hour before dawn, and by broad sun-up had made +eight or ten miles, and were in the midst of a sparsely settled +country. I had a pretty heavy knapsack; it was laden with +provisions--provisions for the king to taper down on, till he +could take to the coarse fare of the country without damage. + +I found a comfortable seat for the king by the roadside, and then +gave him a morsel or two to stay his stomach with. Then I said +I would find some water for him, and strolled away. Part of my +project was to get out of sight and sit down and rest a little +myself. It had always been my custom to stand when in his presence; +even at the council board, except upon those rare occasions when +the sitting was a very long one, extending over hours; then I had +a trifling little backless thing which was like a reversed culvert +and was as comfortable as the toothache. I didn't want to break +him in suddenly, but do it by degrees. We should have to sit +together now when in company, or people would notice; but it would +not be good politics for me to be playing equality with him when +there was no necessity for it. + +I found the water some three hundred yards away, and had been +resting about twenty minutes, when I heard voices. That is all +right, I thought--peasants going to work; nobody else likely to be +stirring this early. But the next moment these comers jingled into +sight around a turn of the road--smartly clad people of quality, +with luggage-mules and servants in their train! I was off like +a shot, through the bushes, by the shortest cut. For a while it +did seem that these people would pass the king before I could +get to him; but desperation gives you wings, you know, and I canted +my body forward, inflated my breast, and held my breath and flew. +I arrived. And in plenty good enough time, too. + +"Pardon, my king, but it's no time for ceremony--jump! Jump to +your feet--some quality are coming!" + +"Is that a marvel? Let them come." + +"But my liege! You must not be seen sitting. Rise!--and stand in +humble posture while they pass. You are a peasant, you know." + +"True--I had forgot it, so lost was I in planning of a huge war +with Gaul"--he was up by this time, but a farm could have got up +quicker, if there was any kind of a boom in real estate--"and +right-so a thought came randoming overthwart this majestic dream +the which--" + +"A humbler attitude, my lord the king--and quick! Duck your head! +--more!--still more!--droop it!" + +He did his honest best, but lord, it was no great things. He looked +as humble as the leaning tower at Pisa. It is the most you could +say of it. Indeed, it was such a thundering poor success that +it raised wondering scowls all along the line, and a gorgeous +flunkey at the tail end of it raised his whip; but I jumped in +time and was under it when it fell; and under cover of the volley +of coarse laughter which followed, I spoke up sharply and warned +the king to take no notice. He mastered himself for the moment, +but it was a sore tax; he wanted to eat up the procession. I said: + +"It would end our adventures at the very start; and we, being +without weapons, could do nothing with that armed gang. If we +are going to succeed in our emprise, we must not only look the +peasant but act the peasant." + +"It is wisdom; none can gainsay it. Let us go on, Sir Boss. +I will take note and learn, and do the best I may." + +He kept his word. He did the best he could, but I've seen better. +If you have ever seen an active, heedless, enterprising child +going diligently out of one mischief and into another all day +long, and an anxious mother at its heels all the while, and just +saving it by a hair from drowning itself or breaking its neck with +each new experiment, you've seen the king and me. + +If I could have foreseen what the thing was going to be like, +I should have said, No, if anybody wants to make his living +exhibiting a king as a peasant, let him take the layout; I can +do better with a menagerie, and last longer. And yet, during +the first three days I never allowed him to enter a hut or other +dwelling. If he could pass muster anywhere during his early +novitiate it would be in small inns and on the road; so to these +places we confined ourselves. Yes, he certainly did the best he +could, but what of that? He didn't improve a bit that I could see. + +He was always frightening me, always breaking out with fresh +astonishers, in new and unexpected places. Toward evening on +the second day, what does he do but blandly fetch out a dirk +from inside his robe! + +"Great guns, my liege, where did you get that?" + +"From a smuggler at the inn, yester eve." + +"What in the world possessed you to buy it?" + +"We have escaped divers dangers by wit--thy wit--but I have +bethought me that it were but prudence if I bore a weapon, too. +Thine might fail thee in some pinch." + +"But people of our condition are not allowed to carry arms. What +would a lord say--yes, or any other person of whatever condition +--if he caught an upstart peasant with a dagger on his person?" + +It was a lucky thing for us that nobody came along just then. +I persuaded him to throw the dirk away; and it was as easy as +persuading a child to give up some bright fresh new way of killing +itself. We walked along, silent and thinking. Finally the king said: + +"When ye know that I meditate a thing inconvenient, or that hath +a peril in it, why do you not warn me to cease from that project?" + +It was a startling question, and a puzzler. I didn't quite know +how to take hold of it, or what to say, and so, of course, I ended +by saying the natural thing: + +"But, sire, how can I know what your thoughts are?" + +The king stopped dead in his tracks, and stared at me. + +"I believed thou wert greater than Merlin; and truly in magic +thou art. But prophecy is greater than magic. Merlin is a prophet." + +I saw I had made a blunder. I must get back my lost ground. +After a deep reflection and careful planning, I said: + +"Sire, I have been misunderstood. I will explain. There are two +kinds of prophecy. One is the gift to foretell things that are but +a little way off, the other is the gift to foretell things that +are whole ages and centuries away. Which is the mightier gift, +do you think?" + +"Oh, the last, most surely!" + +"True. Does Merlin possess it?" + +"Partly, yes. He foretold mysteries about my birth and future +kingship that were twenty years away." + +"Has he ever gone beyond that?" + +"He would not claim more, I think." + +"It is probably his limit. All prophets have their limit. The limit +of some of the great prophets has been a hundred years." + +"These are few, I ween." + +"There have been two still greater ones, whose limit was four +hundred and six hundred years, and one whose limit compassed +even seven hundred and twenty." + +"Gramercy, it is marvelous!" + +"But what are these in comparison with me? They are nothing." + +"What? Canst thou truly look beyond even so vast a stretch +of time as--" + +"Seven hundred years? My liege, as clear as the vision of an eagle +does my prophetic eye penetrate and lay bare the future of this +world for nearly thirteen centuries and a half!" + +My land, you should have seen the king's eyes spread slowly open, +and lift the earth's entire atmosphere as much as an inch! That +settled Brer Merlin. One never had any occasion to prove his +facts, with these people; all he had to do was to state them. It +never occurred to anybody to doubt the statement. + +"Now, then," I continued, "I _could_ work both kinds of prophecy +--the long and the short--if I chose to take the trouble to keep +in practice; but I seldom exercise any but the long kind, because +the other is beneath my dignity. It is properer to Merlin's sort +--stump-tail prophets, as we call them in the profession. Of course, +I whet up now and then and flirt out a minor prophecy, but not +often--hardly ever, in fact. You will remember that there was +great talk, when you reached the Valley of Holiness, about my +having prophesied your coming and the very hour of your arrival, +two or three days beforehand." + +"Indeed, yes, I mind it now." + +"Well, I could have done it as much as forty times easier, and +piled on a thousand times more detail into the bargain, if it had +been five hundred years away instead of two or three days." + +"How amazing that it should be so!" + +"Yes, a genuine expert can always foretell a thing that is five +hundred years away easier than he can a thing that's only five +hundred seconds off." + +"And yet in reason it should clearly be the other way; it should +be five hundred times as easy to foretell the last as the first, +for, indeed, it is so close by that one uninspired might almost +see it. In truth, the law of prophecy doth contradict the likelihoods, +most strangely making the difficult easy, and the easy difficult." + +It was a wise head. A peasant's cap was no safe disguise for it; +you could know it for a king's under a diving-bell, if you could +hear it work its intellect. + +I had a new trade now, and plenty of business in it. The king +was as hungry to find out everything that was going to happen +during the next thirteen centuries as if he were expecting to live +in them. From that time out, I prophesied myself bald-headed +trying to supply the demand. I have done some indiscreet things in +my day, but this thing of playing myself for a prophet was the +worst. Still, it had its ameliorations. A prophet doesn't have +to have any brains. They are good to have, of course, for the +ordinary exigencies of life, but they are no use in professional +work. It is the restfulest vocation there is. When the spirit of +prophecy comes upon you, you merely cake your intellect and lay it +off in a cool place for a rest, and unship your jaw and leave it +alone; it will work itself: the result is prophecy. + +Every day a knight-errant or so came along, and the sight of them +fired the king's martial spirit every time. He would have forgotten +himself, sure, and said something to them in a style a suspicious +shade or so above his ostensible degree, and so I always got him +well out of the road in time. Then he would stand and look with +all his eyes; and a proud light would flash from them, and his +nostrils would inflate like a war-horse's, and I knew he was +longing for a brush with them. But about noon of the third day +I had stopped in the road to take a precaution which had been +suggested by the whip-stroke that had fallen to my share two days +before; a precaution which I had afterward decided to leave untaken, +I was so loath to institute it; but now I had just had a fresh +reminder: while striding heedlessly along, with jaw spread and +intellect at rest, for I was prophesying, I stubbed my toe and +fell sprawling. I was so pale I couldn't think for a moment; +then I got softly and carefully up and unstrapped my knapsack. +I had that dynamite bomb in it, done up in wool in a box. It was +a good thing to have along; the time would come when I could do +a valuable miracle with it, maybe, but it was a nervous thing +to have about me, and I didn't like to ask the king to carry it. +Yet I must either throw it away or think up some safe way to get +along with its society. I got it out and slipped it into my scrip, +and just then here came a couple of knights. The king stood, +stately as a statue, gazing toward them--had forgotten himself again, +of course--and before I could get a word of warning out, it was +time for him to skip, and well that he did it, too. He supposed +they would turn aside. Turn aside to avoid trampling peasant dirt +under foot? When had he ever turned aside himself--or ever had +the chance to do it, if a peasant saw him or any other noble knight +in time to judiciously save him the trouble? The knights paid +no attention to the king at all; it was his place to look out +himself, and if he hadn't skipped he would have been placidly +ridden down, and laughed at besides. + +The king was in a flaming fury, and launched out his challenge +and epithets with a most royal vigor. The knights were some little +distance by now. They halted, greatly surprised, and turned in +their saddles and looked back, as if wondering if it might be worth +while to bother with such scum as we. Then they wheeled and +started for us. Not a moment must be lost. I started for _them_. +I passed them at a rattling gait, and as I went by I flung out a +hair-lifting soul-scorching thirteen-jointed insult which made +the king's effort poor and cheap by comparison. I got it out of +the nineteenth century where they know how. They had such headway +that they were nearly to the king before they could check up; +then, frantic with rage, they stood up their horses on their hind +hoofs and whirled them around, and the next moment here they came, +breast to breast. I was seventy yards off, then, and scrambling up +a great bowlder at the roadside. When they were within thirty +yards of me they let their long lances droop to a level, depressed +their mailed heads, and so, with their horse-hair plumes streaming +straight out behind, most gallant to see, this lightning express +came tearing for me! When they were within fifteen yards, I sent +that bomb with a sure aim, and it struck the ground just under +the horses' noses. + +Yes, it was a neat thing, very neat and pretty to see. It resembled +a steamboat explosion on the Mississippi; and during the next +fifteen minutes we stood under a steady drizzle of microscopic +fragments of knights and hardware and horse-flesh. I say we, +for the king joined the audience, of course, as soon as he had got +his breath again. There was a hole there which would afford steady +work for all the people in that region for some years to come +--in trying to explain it, I mean; as for filling it up, that service +would be comparatively prompt, and would fall to the lot of a +select few--peasants of that seignory; and they wouldn't get +anything for it, either. + +But I explained it to the king myself. I said it was done with a +dynamite bomb. This information did him no damage, because it +left him as intelligent as he was before. However, it was a noble +miracle, in his eyes, and was another settler for Merlin. I thought +it well enough to explain that this was a miracle of so rare a sort +that it couldn't be done except when the atmospheric conditions +were just right. Otherwise he would be encoring it every time we +had a good subject, and that would be inconvenient, because I +hadn't any more bombs along. + + + +CHAPTER XXVIII + +DRILLING THE KING + +On the morning of the fourth day, when it was just sunrise, and we +had been tramping an hour in the chill dawn, I came to a resolution: +the king _must_ be drilled; things could not go on so, he must be +taken in hand and deliberately and conscientiously drilled, or we +couldn't ever venture to enter a dwelling; the very cats would know +this masquerader for a humbug and no peasant. So I called a halt +and said: + +"Sire, as between clothes and countenance, you are all right, there +is no discrepancy; but as between your clothes and your bearing, +you are all wrong, there is a most noticeable discrepancy. Your +soldierly stride, your lordly port--these will not do. You stand +too straight, your looks are too high, too confident. The cares +of a kingdom do not stoop the shoulders, they do not droop the chin, +they do not depress the high level of the eye-glance, they do not +put doubt and fear in the heart and hang out the signs of them +in slouching body and unsure step. It is the sordid cares of +the lowly born that do these things. You must learn the trick; +you must imitate the trademarks of poverty, misery, oppression, +insult, and the other several and common inhumanities that sap +the manliness out of a man and make him a loyal and proper and +approved subject and a satisfaction to his masters, or the very +infants will know you for better than your disguise, and we shall go +to pieces at the first hut we stop at. Pray try to walk like this." + +The king took careful note, and then tried an imitation. + +"Pretty fair--pretty fair. Chin a little lower, please--there, very +good. Eyes too high; pray don't look at the horizon, look at the +ground, ten steps in front of you. Ah--that is better, that is +very good. Wait, please; you betray too much vigor, too much +decision; you want more of a shamble. Look at me, please--this is +what I mean.... Now you are getting it; that is the idea--at least, +it sort of approaches it.... Yes, that is pretty fair. _But!_ +There is a great big something wanting, I don't quite know what +it is. Please walk thirty yards, so that I can get a perspective +on the thing.... Now, then--your head's right, speed's right, +shoulders right, eyes right, chin right, gait, carriage, general +style right--everything's right! And yet the fact remains, the +aggregate's wrong. The account don't balance. Do it again, +please.... _Now_ I think I begin to see what it is. Yes, I've +struck it. You see, the genuine spiritlessness is wanting; that's +what's the trouble. It's all _amateur_--mechanical details all +right, almost to a hair; everything about the delusion perfect, +except that it don't delude." + +"What, then, must one do, to prevail?" + +"Let me think... I can't seem to quite get at it. In fact, there +isn't anything that can right the matter but practice. This is +a good place for it: roots and stony ground to break up your +stately gait, a region not liable to interruption, only one field +and one hut in sight, and they so far away that nobody could +see us from there. It will be well to move a little off the road +and put in the whole day drilling you, sire." + +After the drill had gone on a little while, I said: + +"Now, sire, imagine that we are at the door of the hut yonder, +and the family are before us. Proceed, please--accost the head +of the house." + +The king unconsciously straightened up like a monument, and said, +with frozen austerity: + +"Varlet, bring a seat; and serve to me what cheer ye have." + +"Ah, your grace, that is not well done." + +"In what lacketh it?" + +"These people do not call _each other_ varlets." + +"Nay, is that true?" + +"Yes; only those above them call them so." + +"Then must I try again. I will call him villein." + +"No-no; for he may be a freeman." + +"Ah--so. Then peradventure I should call him goodman." + +"That would answer, your grace, but it would be still better if +you said friend, or brother." + +"Brother!--to dirt like that?" + +"Ah, but _we_ are pretending to be dirt like that, too." + +"It is even true. I will say it. Brother, bring a seat, and +thereto what cheer ye have, withal. Now 'tis right." + +"Not quite, not wholly right. You have asked for one, not _us_ +--for one, not both; food for one, a seat for one." + +The king looked puzzled--he wasn't a very heavy weight, intellectually. +His head was an hour-glass; it could stow an idea, but it had to do +it a grain at a time, not the whole idea at once. + +"Would _you_ have a seat also--and sit?" + +"If I did not sit, the man would perceive that we were only pretending +to be equals--and playing the deception pretty poorly, too." + +"It is well and truly said! How wonderful is truth, come it in +whatsoever unexpected form it may! Yes, he must bring out seats +and food for both, and in serving us present not ewer and napkin +with more show of respect to the one than to the other." + +"And there is even yet a detail that needs correcting. He must +bring nothing outside; we will go in--in among the dirt, and +possibly other repulsive things,--and take the food with the +household, and after the fashion of the house, and all on equal +terms, except the man be of the serf class; and finally, there +will be no ewer and no napkin, whether he be serf or free. Please +walk again, my liege. There--it is better--it is the best yet; +but not perfect. The shoulders have known no ignobler burden +than iron mail, and they will not stoop." + +"Give me, then, the bag. I will learn the spirit that goeth +with burdens that have not honor. It is the spirit that stoopeth +the shoulders, I ween, and not the weight; for armor is heavy, +yet it is a proud burden, and a man standeth straight in it.... +Nay, but me no buts, offer me no objections. I will have the thing. +Strap it upon my back." + +He was complete now with that knapsack on, and looked as little +like a king as any man I had ever seen. But it was an obstinate +pair of shoulders; they could not seem to learn the trick of +stooping with any sort of deceptive naturalness. The drill went on, +I prompting and correcting: + +"Now, make believe you are in debt, and eaten up by relentless +creditors; you are out of work--which is horse-shoeing, let us +say--and can get none; and your wife is sick, your children are +crying because they are hungry--" + +And so on, and so on. I drilled him as representing in turn all +sorts of people out of luck and suffering dire privations and +misfortunes. But lord, it was only just words, words--they meant +nothing in the world to him, I might just as well have whistled. +Words realize nothing, vivify nothing to you, unless you have +suffered in your own person the thing which the words try to +describe. There are wise people who talk ever so knowingly and +complacently about "the working classes," and satisfy themselves +that a day's hard intellectual work is very much harder than +a day's hard manual toil, and is righteously entitled to much +bigger pay. Why, they really think that, you know, because they +know all about the one, but haven't tried the other. But I know +all about both; and so far as I am concerned, there isn't money +enough in the universe to hire me to swing a pickaxe thirty days, +but I will do the hardest kind of intellectual work for just as +near nothing as you can cipher it down--and I will be satisfied, too. + +Intellectual "work" is misnamed; it is a pleasure, a dissipation, +and is its own highest reward. The poorest paid architect, +engineer, general, author, sculptor, painter, lecturer, advocate, +legislator, actor, preacher, singer is constructively in heaven +when he is at work; and as for the musician with the fiddle-bow +in his hand who sits in the midst of a great orchestra with the +ebbing and flowing tides of divine sound washing over him--why, +certainly, he is at work, if you wish to call it that, but lord, +it's a sarcasm just the same. The law of work does seem utterly +unfair--but there it is, and nothing can change it: the higher +the pay in enjoyment the worker gets out of it, the higher shall +be his pay in cash, also. And it's also the very law of those +transparent swindles, transmissible nobility and kingship. + + + +CHAPTER XXIX + +THE SMALLPOX HUT + +When we arrived at that hut at mid-afternoon, we saw no signs +of life about it. The field near by had been denuded of its crop +some time before, and had a skinned look, so exhaustively had +it been harvested and gleaned. Fences, sheds, everything had a +ruined look, and were eloquent of poverty. No animal was around +anywhere, no living thing in sight. The stillness was awful, it +was like the stillness of death. The cabin was a one-story one, +whose thatch was black with age, and ragged from lack of repair. + +The door stood a trifle ajar. We approached it stealthily--on tiptoe +and at half-breath--for that is the way one's feeling makes him do, +at such a time. The king knocked. We waited. No answer. Knocked +again. No answer. I pushed the door softly open and looked in. +I made out some dim forms, and a woman started up from the ground +and stared at me, as one does who is wakened from sleep. Presently +she found her voice: + +"Have mercy!" she pleaded. "All is taken, nothing is left." + +"I have not come to take anything, poor woman." + +"You are not a priest?" + +"No." + +"Nor come not from the lord of the manor?" + +"No, I am a stranger." + +"Oh, then, for the fear of God, who visits with misery and death +such as be harmless, tarry not here, but fly! This place is under +his curse--and his Church's." + +"Let me come in and help you--you are sick and in trouble." + +I was better used to the dim light now. I could see her hollow +eyes fixed upon me. I could see how emaciated she was. + +"I tell you the place is under the Church's ban. Save yourself +--and go, before some straggler see thee here, and report it." + +"Give yourself no trouble about me; I don't care anything for the +Church's curse. Let me help you." + +"Now all good spirits--if there be any such--bless thee for that +word. Would God I had a sup of water!--but hold, hold, forget +I said it, and fly; for there is that here that even he that +feareth not the Church must fear: this disease whereof we die. +Leave us, thou brave, good stranger, and take with thee such +whole and sincere blessing as them that be accursed can give." + +But before this I had picked up a wooden bowl and was rushing +past the king on my way to the brook. It was ten yards away. +When I got back and entered, the king was within, and was opening +the shutter that closed the window-hole, to let in air and light. +The place was full of a foul stench. I put the bowl to the woman's +lips, and as she gripped it with her eager talons the shutter came +open and a strong light flooded her face. Smallpox! + +I sprang to the king, and said in his ear: + +"Out of the door on the instant, sire! the woman is dying of that +disease that wasted the skirts of Camelot two years ago." + +He did not budge. + +"Of a truth I shall remain--and likewise help." + +I whispered again: + +"King, it must not be. You must go." + +"Ye mean well, and ye speak not unwisely. But it were shame that +a king should know fear, and shame that belted knight should +withhold his hand where be such as need succor. Peace, I will +not go. It is you who must go. The Church's ban is not upon me, +but it forbiddeth you to be here, and she will deal with you with +a heavy hand an word come to her of your trespass." + +It was a desperate place for him to be in, and might cost him his +life, but it was no use to argue with him. If he considered his +knightly honor at stake here, that was the end of argument; he +would stay, and nothing could prevent it; I was aware of that. +And so I dropped the subject. The woman spoke: + +"Fair sir, of your kindness will ye climb the ladder there, +and bring me news of what ye find? Be not afraid to report, +for times can come when even a mother's heart is past breaking +--being already broke." + +"Abide," said the king, "and give the woman to eat. I will go." +And he put down the knapsack. + +I turned to start, but the king had already started. He halted, +and looked down upon a man who lay in a dim light, and had not +noticed us thus far, or spoken. + +"Is it your husband?" the king asked. + +"Yes." + +"Is he asleep?" + +"God be thanked for that one charity, yes--these three hours. +Where shall I pay to the full, my gratitude! for my heart is +bursting with it for that sleep he sleepeth now." + +I said: + +"We will be careful. We will not wake him." + +"Ah, no, that ye will not, for he is dead." + +"Dead?" + +"Yes, what triumph it is to know it! None can harm him, none +insult him more. He is in heaven now, and happy; or if not there, +he bides in hell and is content; for in that place he will find +neither abbot nor yet bishop. We were boy and girl together; we +were man and wife these five and twenty years, and never separated +till this day. Think how long that is to love and suffer together. +This morning was he out of his mind, and in his fancy we were +boy and girl again and wandering in the happy fields; and so in +that innocent glad converse wandered he far and farther, still +lightly gossiping, and entered into those other fields we know +not of, and was shut away from mortal sight. And so there was +no parting, for in his fancy I went with him; he knew not but +I went with him, my hand in his--my young soft hand, not this +withered claw. Ah, yes, to go, and know it not; to separate and +know it not; how could one go peace--fuller than that? It was +his reward for a cruel life patiently borne." + +There was a slight noise from the direction of the dim corner where +the ladder was. It was the king descending. I could see that he +was bearing something in one arm, and assisting himself with the +other. He came forward into the light; upon his breast lay a +slender girl of fifteen. She was but half conscious; she was dying +of smallpox. Here was heroism at its last and loftiest possibility, +its utmost summit; this was challenging death in the open field +unarmed, with all the odds against the challenger, no reward set +upon the contest, and no admiring world in silks and cloth of gold +to gaze and applaud; and yet the king's bearing was as serenely +brave as it had always been in those cheaper contests where knight +meets knight in equal fight and clothed in protecting steel. He +was great now; sublimely great. The rude statues of his ancestors +in his palace should have an addition--I would see to that; and it +would not be a mailed king killing a giant or a dragon, like the +rest, it would be a king in commoner's garb bearing death in his +arms that a peasant mother might look her last upon her child and +be comforted. + +He laid the girl down by her mother, who poured out endearments +and caresses from an overflowing heart, and one could detect a +flickering faint light of response in the child's eyes, but that +was all. The mother hung over her, kissing her, petting her, and +imploring her to speak, but the lips only moved and no sound came. +I snatched my liquor flask from my knapsack, but the woman forbade +me, and said: + +"No--she does not suffer; it is better so. It might bring her back +to life. None that be so good and kind as ye are would do her +that cruel hurt. For look you--what is left to live for? Her +brothers are gone, her father is gone, her mother goeth, the +Church's curse is upon her, and none may shelter or befriend her +even though she lay perishing in the road. She is desolate. I have +not asked you, good heart, if her sister be still on live, here +overhead; I had no need; ye had gone back, else, and not left +the poor thing forsaken--" + +"She lieth at peace," interrupted the king, in a subdued voice. + +"I would not change it. How rich is this day in happiness! Ah, +my Annis, thou shalt join thy sister soon--thou'rt on thy way, +and these be merciful friends that will not hinder." + +And so she fell to murmuring and cooing over the girl again, and +softly stroking her face and hair, and kissing her and calling her +by endearing names; but there was scarcely sign of response now +in the glazing eyes. I saw tears well from the king's eyes, and +trickle down his face. The woman noticed them, too, and said: + +"Ah, I know that sign: thou'st a wife at home, poor soul, and +you and she have gone hungry to bed, many's the time, that the +little ones might have your crust; you know what poverty is, and +the daily insults of your betters, and the heavy hand of the Church +and the king." + +The king winced under this accidental home-shot, but kept still; +he was learning his part; and he was playing it well, too, for +a pretty dull beginner. I struck up a diversion. I offered the +woman food and liquor, but she refused both. She would allow +nothing to come between her and the release of death. Then I slipped +away and brought the dead child from aloft, and laid it by her. +This broke her down again, and there was another scene that was +full of heartbreak. By and by I made another diversion, and beguiled +her to sketch her story. + +"Ye know it well yourselves, having suffered it--for truly none +of our condition in Britain escape it. It is the old, weary tale. +We fought and struggled and succeeded; meaning by success, that +we lived and did not die; more than that is not to be claimed. No +troubles came that we could not outlive, till this year brought +them; then came they all at once, as one might say, and overwhelmed +us. Years ago the lord of the manor planted certain fruit trees on +our farm; in the best part of it, too--a grievous wrong and shame--" + +"But it was his right," interrupted the king. + +"None denieth that, indeed; an the law mean anything, what is +the lord's is his, and what is mine is his also. Our farm was +ours by lease, therefore 'twas likewise his, to do with it as he +would. Some little time ago, three of those trees were found hewn +down. Our three grown sons ran frightened to report the crime. +Well, in his lordship's dungeon there they lie, who saith there +shall they lie and rot till they confess. They have naught to +confess, being innocent, wherefore there will they remain until +they die. Ye know that right well, I ween. Think how this left us; +a man, a woman and two children, to gather a crop that was planted +by so much greater force, yes, and protect it night and day from +pigeons and prowling animals that be sacred and must not be hurt +by any of our sort. When my lord's crop was nearly ready for +the harvest, so also was ours; when his bell rang to call us to +his fields to harvest his crop for nothing, he would not allow that +I and my two girls should count for our three captive sons, but +for only two of them; so, for the lacking one were we daily fined. +All this time our own crop was perishing through neglect; and so +both the priest and his lordship fined us because their shares +of it were suffering through damage. In the end the fines ate up +our crop--and they took it all; they took it all and made us harvest +it for them, without pay or food, and we starving. Then the worst +came when I, being out of my mind with hunger and loss of my boys, +and grief to see my husband and my little maids in rags and misery +and despair, uttered a deep blasphemy--oh! a thousand of them! +--against the Church and the Church's ways. It was ten days ago. +I had fallen sick with this disease, and it was to the priest +I said the words, for he was come to chide me for lack of due +humility under the chastening hand of God. He carried my trespass +to his betters; I was stubborn; wherefore, presently upon my head +and upon all heads that were dear to me, fell the curse of Rome. + +"Since that day we are avoided, shunned with horror. None has +come near this hut to know whether we live or not. The rest of us +were taken down. Then I roused me and got up, as wife and mother +will. It was little they could have eaten in any case; it was +less than little they had to eat. But there was water, and I gave +them that. How they craved it! and how they blessed it! But the +end came yesterday; my strength broke down. Yesterday was the +last time I ever saw my husband and this youngest child alive. +I have lain here all these hours--these ages, ye may say--listening, +listening for any sound up there that--" + +She gave a sharp quick glance at her eldest daughter, then cried +out, "Oh, my darling!" and feebly gathered the stiffening form +to her sheltering arms. She had recognized the death-rattle. + + + +CHAPTER XXX + +THE TRAGEDY OF THE MANOR-HOUSE + +At midnight all was over, and we sat in the presence of four +corpses. We covered them with such rags as we could find, and +started away, fastening the door behind us. Their home must be +these people's grave, for they could not have Christian burial, +or be admitted to consecrated ground. They were as dogs, wild +beasts, lepers, and no soul that valued its hope of eternal life +would throw it away by meddling in any sort with these rebuked and +smitten outcasts. + +We had not moved four steps when I caught a sound as of footsteps +upon gravel. My heart flew to my throat. We must not be seen +coming from that house. I plucked at the king's robe and we drew +back and took shelter behind the corner of the cabin. + +"Now we are safe," I said, "but it was a close call--so to speak. +If the night had been lighter he might have seen us, no doubt, +he seemed to be so near." + +"Mayhap it is but a beast and not a man at all." + +"True. But man or beast, it will be wise to stay here a minute +and let it get by and out of the way." + +"Hark! It cometh hither." + +True again. The step was coming toward us--straight toward the hut. +It must be a beast, then, and we might as well have saved our +trepidation. I was going to step out, but the king laid his hand +upon my arm. There was a moment of silence, then we heard a soft +knock on the cabin door. It made me shiver. Presently the knock +was repeated, and then we heard these words in a guarded voice: + +"Mother! Father! Open--we have got free, and we bring news to +pale your cheeks but glad your hearts; and we may not tarry, but +must fly! And--but they answer not. Mother! father!--" + +I drew the king toward the other end of the hut and whispered: + +"Come--now we can get to the road." + +The king hesitated, was going to demur; but just then we heard +the door give way, and knew that those desolate men were in the +presence of their dead. + +"Come, my liege! in a moment they will strike a light, and then +will follow that which it would break your heart to hear." + +He did not hesitate this time. The moment we were in the road +I ran; and after a moment he threw dignity aside and followed. +I did not want to think of what was happening in the hut--I couldn't +bear it; I wanted to drive it out of my mind; so I struck into the +first subject that lay under that one in my mind: + +"I have had the disease those people died of, and so have nothing +to fear; but if you have not had it also--" + +He broke in upon me to say he was in trouble, and it was his +conscience that was troubling him: + +"These young men have got free, they say--but _how_? It is not +likely that their lord hath set them free." + +"Oh, no, I make no doubt they escaped." + +"That is my trouble; I have a fear that this is so, and your +suspicion doth confirm it, you having the same fear." + +"I should not call it by that name though. I do suspect that they +escaped, but if they did, I am not sorry, certainly." + +"I am not sorry, I _think_--but--" + +"What is it? What is there for one to be troubled about?" + +"_If_ they did escape, then are we bound in duty to lay hands upon +them and deliver them again to their lord; for it is not seemly +that one of his quality should suffer a so insolent and high-handed +outrage from persons of their base degree." + +There it was again. He could see only one side of it. He was +born so, educated so, his veins were full of ancestral blood that +was rotten with this sort of unconscious brutality, brought down +by inheritance from a long procession of hearts that had each done +its share toward poisoning the stream. To imprison these men +without proof, and starve their kindred, was no harm, for they were +merely peasants and subject to the will and pleasure of their lord, +no matter what fearful form it might take; but for these men to +break out of unjust captivity was insult and outrage, and a thing +not to be countenanced by any conscientious person who knew his +duty to his sacred caste. + +I worked more than half an hour before I got him to change the +subject--and even then an outside matter did it for me. This was +a something which caught our eyes as we struck the summit of a +small hill--a red glow, a good way off. + +"That's a fire," said I. + +Fires interested me considerably, because I was getting a good +deal of an insurance business started, and was also training some +horses and building some steam fire-engines, with an eye to a paid +fire department by and by. The priests opposed both my fire and +life insurance, on the ground that it was an insolent attempt to +hinder the decrees of God; and if you pointed out that they did not +hinder the decrees in the least, but only modified the hard +consequences of them if you took out policies and had luck, they +retorted that that was gambling against the decrees of God, and was +just as bad. So they managed to damage those industries more +or less, but I got even on my Accident business. As a rule, a knight +is a lummox, and some times even a labrick, and hence open to pretty +poor arguments when they come glibly from a superstition-monger, +but even _he_ could see the practical side of a thing once in a while; +and so of late you couldn't clean up a tournament and pile the +result without finding one of my accident-tickets in every helmet. + +We stood there awhile, in the thick darkness and stillness, looking +toward the red blur in the distance, and trying to make out the +meaning of a far-away murmur that rose and fell fitfully on the +night. Sometimes it swelled up and for a moment seemed less +remote; but when we were hopefully expecting it to betray its cause +and nature, it dulled and sank again, carrying its mystery with it. +We started down the hill in its direction, and the winding road +plunged us at once into almost solid darkness--darkness that was +packed and crammed in between two tall forest walls. We groped +along down for half a mile, perhaps, that murmur growing more and +more distinct all the time. The coming storm threatening more and +more, with now and then a little shiver of wind, a faint show of +lightning, and dull grumblings of distant thunder. I was in the +lead. I ran against something--a soft heavy something which gave, +slightly, to the impulse of my weight; at the same moment the +lightning glared out, and within a foot of my face was the writhing +face of a man who was hanging from the limb of a tree! That is, +it seemed to be writhing, but it was not. It was a grewsome sight. +Straightway there was an ear-splitting explosion of thunder, and +the bottom of heaven fell out; the rain poured down in a deluge. +No matter, we must try to cut this man down, on the chance that +there might be life in him yet, mustn't we? The lightning came +quick and sharp now, and the place was alternately noonday and +midnight. One moment the man would be hanging before me in an +intense light, and the next he was blotted out again in the darkness. +I told the king we must cut him down. The king at once objected. + +"If he hanged himself, he was willing to lose him property to +his lord; so let him be. If others hanged him, belike they had +the right--let him hang." + +"But--" + +"But me no buts, but even leave him as he is. And for yet another +reason. When the lightning cometh again--there, look abroad." + +Two others hanging, within fifty yards of us! + +"It is not weather meet for doing useless courtesies unto dead folk. +They are past thanking you. Come--it is unprofitable to tarry here." + +There was reason in what he said, so we moved on. Within the next +mile we counted six more hanging forms by the blaze of the lightning, +and altogether it was a grisly excursion. That murmur was a murmur +no longer, it was a roar; a roar of men's voices. A man came flying +by now, dimly through the darkness, and other men chasing him. +They disappeared. Presently another case of the kind occurred, +and then another and another. Then a sudden turn of the road +brought us in sight of that fire--it was a large manor-house, and +little or nothing was left of it--and everywhere men were flying +and other men raging after them in pursuit. + +I warned the king that this was not a safe place for strangers. +We would better get away from the light, until matters should +improve. We stepped back a little, and hid in the edge of the +wood. From this hiding-place we saw both men and women hunted +by the mob. The fearful work went on until nearly dawn. Then, +the fire being out and the storm spent, the voices and flying +footsteps presently ceased, and darkness and stillness reigned again. + +We ventured out, and hurried cautiously away; and although we were +worn out and sleepy, we kept on until we had put this place some +miles behind us. Then we asked hospitality at the hut of a charcoal +burner, and got what was to be had. A woman was up and about, but +the man was still asleep, on a straw shake-down, on the clay floor. +The woman seemed uneasy until I explained that we were travelers +and had lost our way and been wandering in the woods all night. +She became talkative, then, and asked if we had heard of the +terrible goings-on at the manor-house of Abblasoure. Yes, we had +heard of them, but what we wanted now was rest and sleep. The +king broke in: + +"Sell us the house and take yourselves away, for we be perilous +company, being late come from people that died of the Spotted Death." + +It was good of him, but unnecessary. One of the commonest decorations +of the nation was the waffle-iron face. I had early noticed that +the woman and her husband were both so decorated. She made us +entirely welcome, and had no fears; and plainly she was immensely +impressed by the king's proposition; for, of course, it was a good +deal of an event in her life to run across a person of the king's +humble appearance who was ready to buy a man's house for the sake +of a night's lodging. It gave her a large respect for us, and she +strained the lean possibilities of her hovel to the utmost to make +us comfortable. + +We slept till far into the afternoon, and then got up hungry enough to +make cotter fare quite palatable to the king, the more particularly +as it was scant in quantity. And also in variety; it consisted +solely of onions, salt, and the national black bread made out of +horse-feed. The woman told us about the affair of the evening +before. At ten or eleven at night, when everybody was in bed, +the manor-house burst into flames. The country-side swarmed to +the rescue, and the family were saved, with one exception, the +master. He did not appear. Everybody was frantic over this loss, +and two brave yeomen sacrificed their lives in ransacking the +burning house seeking that valuable personage. But after a while +he was found--what was left of him--which was his corpse. It was +in a copse three hundred yards away, bound, gagged, stabbed in a +dozen places. + +Who had done this? Suspicion fell upon a humble family in the +neighborhood who had been lately treated with peculiar harshness +by the baron; and from these people the suspicion easily extended +itself to their relatives and familiars. A suspicion was enough; +my lord's liveried retainers proclaimed an instant crusade against +these people, and were promptly joined by the community in general. +The woman's husband had been active with the mob, and had not +returned home until nearly dawn. He was gone now to find out +what the general result had been. While we were still talking he +came back from his quest. His report was revolting enough. Eighteen +persons hanged or butchered, and two yeomen and thirteen prisoners +lost in the fire. + +"And how many prisoners were there altogether in the vaults?" + +"Thirteen." + +"Then every one of them was lost?" + +"Yes, all." + +"But the people arrived in time to save the family; how is it they +could save none of the prisoners?" + +The man looked puzzled, and said: + +"Would one unlock the vaults at such a time? Marry, some would +have escaped." + +"Then you mean that nobody _did_ unlock them?" + +"None went near them, either to lock or unlock. It standeth to +reason that the bolts were fast; wherefore it was only needful +to establish a watch, so that if any broke the bonds he might not +escape, but be taken. None were taken." + +"Natheless, three did escape," said the king, "and ye will do well +to publish it and set justice upon their track, for these murthered +the baron and fired the house." + +I was just expecting he would come out with that. For a moment +the man and his wife showed an eager interest in this news and +an impatience to go out and spread it; then a sudden something +else betrayed itself in their faces, and they began to ask questions. +I answered the questions myself, and narrowly watched the effects +produced. I was soon satisfied that the knowledge of who these +three prisoners were had somehow changed the atmosphere; that +our hosts' continued eagerness to go and spread the news was now +only pretended and not real. The king did not notice the change, +and I was glad of that. I worked the conversation around toward +other details of the night's proceedings, and noted that these +people were relieved to have it take that direction. + +The painful thing observable about all this business was the +alacrity with which this oppressed community had turned their +cruel hands against their own class in the interest of the common +oppressor. This man and woman seemed to feel that in a quarrel +between a person of their own class and his lord, it was the natural +and proper and rightful thing for that poor devil's whole caste +to side with the master and fight his battle for him, without ever +stopping to inquire into the rights or wrongs of the matter. This +man had been out helping to hang his neighbors, and had done his +work with zeal, and yet was aware that there was nothing against +them but a mere suspicion, with nothing back of it describable +as evidence, still neither he nor his wife seemed to see anything +horrible about it. + +This was depressing--to a man with the dream of a republic in his +head. It reminded me of a time thirteen centuries away, when +the "poor whites" of our South who were always despised and +frequently insulted by the slave-lords around them, and who owed +their base condition simply to the presence of slavery in their +midst, were yet pusillanimously ready to side with the slave-lords +in all political moves for the upholding and perpetuating of +slavery, and did also finally shoulder their muskets and pour out +their lives in an effort to prevent the destruction of that very +institution which degraded them. And there was only one redeeming +feature connected with that pitiful piece of history; and that was, +that secretly the "poor white" did detest the slave-lord, and did +feel his own shame. That feeling was not brought to the surface, +but the fact that it was there and could have been brought out, +under favoring circumstances, was something--in fact, it was enough; +for it showed that a man is at bottom a man, after all, even if it +doesn't show on the outside. + +Well, as it turned out, this charcoal burner was just the twin of +the Southern "poor white" of the far future. The king presently +showed impatience, and said: + +"An ye prattle here all the day, justice will miscarry. Think ye +the criminals will abide in their father's house? They are fleeing, +they are not waiting. You should look to it that a party of horse +be set upon their track." + +The woman paled slightly, but quite perceptibly, and the man looked +flustered and irresolute. I said: + +"Come, friend, I will walk a little way with you, and explain which +direction I think they would try to take. If they were merely +resisters of the gabelle or some kindred absurdity I would try +to protect them from capture; but when men murder a person of +high degree and likewise burn his house, that is another matter." + +The last remark was for the king--to quiet him. On the road +the man pulled his resolution together, and began the march with +a steady gait, but there was no eagerness in it. By and by I said: + +"What relation were these men to you--cousins?" + +He turned as white as his layer of charcoal would let him, and +stopped, trembling. + +"Ah, my God, how know ye that?" + +"I didn't know it; it was a chance guess." + +"Poor lads, they are lost. And good lads they were, too." + +"Were you actually going yonder to tell on them?" + +He didn't quite know how to take that; but he said, hesitatingly: + +"Ye-s." + +"Then I think you are a damned scoundrel!" + +It made him as glad as if I had called him an angel. + +"Say the good words again, brother! for surely ye mean that ye +would not betray me an I failed of my duty." + +"Duty? There is no duty in the matter, except the duty to keep +still and let those men get away. They've done a righteous deed." + +He looked pleased; pleased, and touched with apprehension at the +same time. He looked up and down the road to see that no one +was coming, and then said in a cautious voice: + +"From what land come you, brother, that you speak such perilous +words, and seem not to be afraid?" + +"They are not perilous words when spoken to one of my own caste, +I take it. You would not tell anybody I said them?" + +"I? I would be drawn asunder by wild horses first." + +"Well, then, let me say my say. I have no fears of your repeating +it. I think devil's work has been done last night upon those +innocent poor people. That old baron got only what he deserved. +If I had my way, all his kind should have the same luck." + +Fear and depression vanished from the man's manner, and gratefulness +and a brave animation took their place: + +"Even though you be a spy, and your words a trap for my undoing, +yet are they such refreshment that to hear them again and others +like to them, I would go to the gallows happy, as having had one +good feast at least in a starved life. And I will say my say now, +and ye may report it if ye be so minded. I helped to hang my +neighbors for that it were peril to my own life to show lack of +zeal in the master's cause; the others helped for none other reason. +All rejoice to-day that he is dead, but all do go about seemingly +sorrowing, and shedding the hypocrite's tear, for in that lies +safety. I have said the words, I have said the words! the only +ones that have ever tasted good in my mouth, and the reward of +that taste is sufficient. Lead on, an ye will, be it even to the +scaffold, for I am ready." + +There it was, you see. A man is a man, at bottom. Whole ages +of abuse and oppression cannot crush the manhood clear out of him. +Whoever thinks it a mistake is himself mistaken. Yes, there is +plenty good enough material for a republic in the most degraded +people that ever existed--even the Russians; plenty of manhood +in them--even in the Germans--if one could but force it out of +its timid and suspicious privacy, to overthrow and trample in the +mud any throne that ever was set up and any nobility that ever +supported it. We should see certain things yet, let us hope and +believe. First, a modified monarchy, till Arthur's days were done, +then the destruction of the throne, nobility abolished, every +member of it bound out to some useful trade, universal suffrage +instituted, and the whole government placed in the hands of the +men and women of the nation there to remain. Yes, there was no +occasion to give up my dream yet a while. + + + +CHAPTER XXXI + +MARCO + +We strolled along in a sufficiently indolent fashion now, and +talked. We must dispose of about the amount of time it ought +to take to go to the little hamlet of Abblasoure and put justice +on the track of those murderers and get back home again. And +meantime I had an auxiliary interest which had never paled yet, +never lost its novelty for me since I had been in Arthur's kingdom: +the behavior--born of nice and exact subdivisions of caste--of chance +passers-by toward each other. Toward the shaven monk who trudged +along with his cowl tilted back and the sweat washing down his +fat jowls, the coal-burner was deeply reverent; to the gentleman +he was abject; with the small farmer and the free mechanic he was +cordial and gossipy; and when a slave passed by with a countenance +respectfully lowered, this chap's nose was in the air--he couldn't +even see him. Well, there are times when one would like to hang +the whole human race and finish the farce. + +Presently we struck an incident. A small mob of half-naked boys +and girls came tearing out of the woods, scared and shrieking. +The eldest among them were not more than twelve or fourteen years +old. They implored help, but they were so beside themselves that +we couldn't make out what the matter was. However, we plunged +into the wood, they skurrying in the lead, and the trouble was +quickly revealed: they had hanged a little fellow with a bark rope, +and he was kicking and struggling, in the process of choking to +death. We rescued him, and fetched him around. It was some more +human nature; the admiring little folk imitating their elders; +they were playing mob, and had achieved a success which promised +to be a good deal more serious than they had bargained for. + +It was not a dull excursion for me. I managed to put in the time +very well. I made various acquaintanceships, and in my quality +of stranger was able to ask as many questions as I wanted to. +A thing which naturally interested me, as a statesman, was the +matter of wages. I picked up what I could under that head during +the afternoon. A man who hasn't had much experience, and doesn't +think, is apt to measure a nation's prosperity or lack of prosperity +by the mere size of the prevailing wages; if the wages be high, the +nation is prosperous; if low, it isn't. Which is an error. It +isn't what sum you get, it's how much you can buy with it, that's +the important thing; and it's that that tells whether your wages +are high in fact or only high in name. I could remember how it +was in the time of our great civil war in the nineteenth century. +In the North a carpenter got three dollars a day, gold valuation; +in the South he got fifty--payable in Confederate shinplasters +worth a dollar a bushel. In the North a suit of overalls cost +three dollars--a day's wages; in the South it cost seventy-five +--which was two days' wages. Other things were in proportion. +Consequently, wages were twice as high in the North as they were +in the South, because the one wage had that much more purchasing +power than the other had. + +Yes, I made various acquaintances in the hamlet and a thing that +gratified me a good deal was to find our new coins in circulation +--lots of milrays, lots of mills, lots of cents, a good many nickels, +and some silver; all this among the artisans and commonalty +generally; yes, and even some gold--but that was at the bank, +that is to say, the goldsmith's. I dropped in there while Marco, +the son of Marco, was haggling with a shopkeeper over a quarter +of a pound of salt, and asked for change for a twenty-dollar gold +piece. They furnished it--that is, after they had chewed the piece, +and rung it on the counter, and tried acid on it, and asked me +where I got it, and who I was, and where I was from, and where +I was going to, and when I expected to get there, and perhaps +a couple of hundred more questions; and when they got aground, +I went right on and furnished them a lot of information voluntarily; +told them I owned a dog, and his name was Watch, and my first wife +was a Free Will Baptist, and her grandfather was a Prohibitionist, +and I used to know a man who had two thumbs on each hand and a wart +on the inside of his upper lip, and died in the hope of a glorious +resurrection, and so on, and so on, and so on, till even that +hungry village questioner began to look satisfied, and also a shade +put out; but he had to respect a man of my financial strength, +and so he didn't give me any lip, but I noticed he took it out of +his underlings, which was a perfectly natural thing to do. Yes, +they changed my twenty, but I judged it strained the bank a little, +which was a thing to be expected, for it was the same as walking +into a paltry village store in the nineteenth century and requiring +the boss of it to change a two thousand-dollar bill for you all +of a sudden. He could do it, maybe; but at the same time he +would wonder how a small farmer happened to be carrying so much +money around in his pocket; which was probably this goldsmith's +thought, too; for he followed me to the door and stood there gazing +after me with reverent admiration. + +Our new money was not only handsomely circulating, but its language +was already glibly in use; that is to say, people had dropped +the names of the former moneys, and spoke of things as being worth +so many dollars or cents or mills or milrays now. It was very +gratifying. We were progressing, that was sure. + +I got to know several master mechanics, but about the most interesting +fellow among them was the blacksmith, Dowley. He was a live man +and a brisk talker, and had two journeymen and three apprentices, +and was doing a raging business. In fact, he was getting rich, +hand over fist, and was vastly respected. Marco was very proud of +having such a man for a friend. He had taken me there ostensibly +to let me see the big establishment which bought so much of his +charcoal, but really to let me see what easy and almost familiar +terms he was on with this great man. Dowley and I fraternized +at once; I had had just such picked men, splendid fellows, under +me in the Colt Arms Factory. I was bound to see more of him, so +I invited him to come out to Marco's Sunday, and dine with us. +Marco was appalled, and held his breath; and when the grandee +accepted, he was so grateful that he almost forgot to be astonished +at the condescension. + +Marco's joy was exuberant--but only for a moment; then he grew +thoughtful, then sad; and when he heard me tell Dowley I should +have Dickon, the boss mason, and Smug, the boss wheelwright, out +there, too, the coal-dust on his face turned to chalk, and he lost +his grip. But I knew what was the matter with him; it was the +expense. He saw ruin before him; he judged that his financial +days were numbered. However, on our way to invite the others, +I said: + +"You must allow me to have these friends come; and you must also +allow me to pay the costs." + +His face cleared, and he said with spirit: + +"But not all of it, not all of it. Ye cannot well bear a burden +like to this alone." + +I stopped him, and said: + +"Now let's understand each other on the spot, old friend. I am +only a farm bailiff, it is true; but I am not poor, nevertheless. +I have been very fortunate this year--you would be astonished +to know how I have thriven. I tell you the honest truth when I say +I could squander away as many as a dozen feasts like this and never +care _that_ for the expense!" and I snapped my fingers. I could +see myself rise a foot at a time in Marco's estimation, and when +I fetched out those last words I was become a very tower for style +and altitude. "So you see, you must let me have my way. You +can't contribute a cent to this orgy, that's _settled_." + +"It's grand and good of you--" + +"No, it isn't. You've opened your house to Jones and me in the +most generous way; Jones was remarking upon it to-day, just before +you came back from the village; for although he wouldn't be likely +to say such a thing to you--because Jones isn't a talker, and is +diffident in society--he has a good heart and a grateful, and +knows how to appreciate it when he is well treated; yes, you and +your wife have been very hospitable toward us--" + +"Ah, brother, 'tis nothing--_such_ hospitality!" + +"But it _is_ something; the best a man has, freely given, is always +something, and is as good as a prince can do, and ranks right +along beside it--for even a prince can but do his best. And so +we'll shop around and get up this layout now, and don't you worry +about the expense. I'm one of the worst spendthrifts that ever +was born. Why, do you know, sometimes in a single week I spend +--but never mind about that--you'd never believe it anyway." + +And so we went gadding along, dropping in here and there, pricing +things, and gossiping with the shopkeepers about the riot, and now +and then running across pathetic reminders of it, in the persons of +shunned and tearful and houseless remnants of families whose homes +had been taken from them and their parents butchered or hanged. +The raiment of Marco and his wife was of coarse tow-linen and +linsey-woolsey respectively, and resembled township maps, it being +made up pretty exclusively of patches which had been added, township +by township, in the course of five or six years, until hardly a +hand's-breadth of the original garments was surviving and present. +Now I wanted to fit these people out with new suits, on account of +that swell company, and I didn't know just how to get at it +--with delicacy, until at last it struck me that as I had already +been liberal in inventing wordy gratitude for the king, it would +be just the thing to back it up with evidence of a substantial +sort; so I said: + +"And Marco, there's another thing which you must permit--out of +kindness for Jones--because you wouldn't want to offend him. +He was very anxious to testify his appreciation in some way, but +he is so diffident he couldn't venture it himself, and so he begged +me to buy some little things and give them to you and Dame Phyllis +and let him pay for them without your ever knowing they came from +him--you know how a delicate person feels about that sort of thing +--and so I said I would, and we would keep mum. Well, his idea +was, a new outfit of clothes for you both--" + +"Oh, it is wastefulness! It may not be, brother, it may not be. +Consider the vastness of the sum--" + +"Hang the vastness of the sum! Try to keep quiet for a moment, +and see how it would seem; a body can't get in a word edgeways, +you talk so much. You ought to cure that, Marco; it isn't good +form, you know, and it will grow on you if you don't check it. +Yes, we'll step in here now and price this man's stuff--and don't +forget to remember to not let on to Jones that you know he had +anything to do with it. You can't think how curiously sensitive +and proud he is. He's a farmer--pretty fairly well-to-do farmer +--an I'm his bailiff; _but_--the imagination of that man! Why, +sometimes when he forgets himself and gets to blowing off, you'd +think he was one of the swells of the earth; and you might listen +to him a hundred years and never take him for a farmer--especially if +he talked agriculture. He _thinks_ he's a Sheol of a farmer; thinks +he's old Grayback from Wayback; but between you and me privately +he don't know as much about farming as he does about running +a kingdom--still, whatever he talks about, you want to drop your +underjaw and listen, the same as if you had never heard such +incredible wisdom in all your life before, and were afraid you +might die before you got enough of it. That will please Jones." + +It tickled Marco to the marrow to hear about such an odd character; +but it also prepared him for accidents; and in my experience when +you travel with a king who is letting on to be something else and +can't remember it more than about half the time, you can't take +too many precautions. + +This was the best store we had come across yet; it had everything +in it, in small quantities, from anvils and drygoods all the way +down to fish and pinchbeck jewelry. I concluded I would bunch +my whole invoice right here, and not go pricing around any more. +So I got rid of Marco, by sending him off to invite the mason and +the wheelwright, which left the field free to me. For I never care +to do a thing in a quiet way; it's got to be theatrical or I don't +take any interest in it. I showed up money enough, in a careless +way, to corral the shopkeeper's respect, and then I wrote down +a list of the things I wanted, and handed it to him to see if he +could read it. He could, and was proud to show that he could. +He said he had been educated by a priest, and could both read +and write. He ran it through, and remarked with satisfaction that +it was a pretty heavy bill. Well, and so it was, for a little +concern like that. I was not only providing a swell dinner, but +some odds and ends of extras. I ordered that the things be carted +out and delivered at the dwelling of Marco, the son of Marco, +by Saturday evening, and send me the bill at dinner-time Sunday. +He said I could depend upon his promptness and exactitude, it was +the rule of the house. He also observed that he would throw in +a couple of miller-guns for the Marcos gratis--that everybody +was using them now. He had a mighty opinion of that clever +device. I said: + +"And please fill them up to the middle mark, too; and add that +to the bill." + +He would, with pleasure. He filled them, and I took them with +me. I couldn't venture to tell him that the miller-gun was a +little invention of my own, and that I had officially ordered that +every shopkeeper in the kingdom keep them on hand and sell them +at government price--which was the merest trifle, and the shopkeeper +got that, not the government. We furnished them for nothing. + +The king had hardly missed us when we got back at nightfall. He +had early dropped again into his dream of a grand invasion of Gaul +with the whole strength of his kingdom at his back, and the afternoon +had slipped away without his ever coming to himself again. + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's +Court, Part 6., by Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK CONNECTICUT YANKEE *** + +***** This file should be named 7247.txt or 7247.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + https://www.gutenberg.org/7/2/4/7247/ + +Produced by David Widger + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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