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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d7b82bc --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,4 @@ +*.txt text eol=lf +*.htm text eol=lf +*.html text eol=lf +*.md text eol=lf diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..17efddf --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #67487 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/67487) diff --git a/old/67487-0.txt b/old/67487-0.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 51c7699..0000000 --- a/old/67487-0.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,702 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Stilled Patter, by James E. Gunn - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and -most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms -of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you -will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before -using this eBook. - -Title: The Stilled Patter - -Author: James E. Gunn - -Release Date: February 24, 2022 [eBook #67487] - -Language: English - -Produced by: Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online Distributed - Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - -*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE STILLED PATTER *** - - - - - - The Stilled Patter - - By JAMES E. GUNN - - Illustrated by STALLMAN - - _The age-old battle of the sexes - may yet be the deadliest of all!_ - - [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from - Infinity Science Fiction, June 1956. - Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that - the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.] - - -George Washington was the father of his country. - -I am not George Washington. My name is Andrew Jones, and it is because -of me there will be no more Joneses in the world. There will be, in -fact, no more anybody. - -This is the end of the world. - -It did not come through fire or ice, with a bang or a whimper, from -solar catastrophe or man's suicidal mis-use of atomic power or any -of the other fearful possibilities with which the Sunday-supplement -writers once terrified us. It came through the exposure of an age-old -conspiracy. - -I did it. My excuse is the eternal excuse of the scientist: I sought -the truth. How it was used was not my concern. - -But that it should have led to the depopulation of the Earth concerns -me, as it must concern every man, and I have an unshakable feeling of -guilt. - -Perhaps I write this now in the hope that I may somehow purge myself. I -know that it will never be read. - -The linen wick gutters in the saucer of melted tallow. It casts strange -shadows on the cellar wall. Sometimes I think that they are the ghosts -of children come to haunt me, the ghosts of all the little children who -will never be born. - -But this is not what I sat down to write while I waited for Lindsay to -return. What is keeping Lindsay? He should be back by now. - -I will begin again. - -My name is Andrew Jones, and today, by my figures, is October 3, 1969. -The weather is turning cold here, and soon we must go looking for -another hiding place. My joints are getting old; the damp has seeped -into them. I long for the year-long warmth of California or Florida, -but those areas are still crowded and deadly. - -Someone would recognize me. - -I think we will try a powerhouse again this winter. Often they have -supplies of coal large enough to last us through the cold weather -without extra foraging. - - * * * * * - -Cataclysm began in 1954, June 13 to be exact. That was the day my -second child was born, a boy we named Kevin. - -It is surprising that a man who was the father of two children should -accuse himself of depopulating the Earth. And yet it is because I was -the father of two children that it happened. - -Pre-natal care of mothers and post-natal care of infants were -subjects of compelling interest in those days, arriving monthly in -the burgeoning women's magazines and annually in the proliferous -child-care manuals. Pediatricians and mothers besieged parents with -advice, and we consumed everything with catholic appetite: logical, -illogical, sensible, insensible, nonsensical, self-contradictory. - -They kept us on our toes, strung as taut as Stradivarius violins, -afraid to act for fear we would do the wrong thing, afraid not to act -for fear inaction would be disastrous. Pediatricians and mothers, -always the same authors. Never were there any articles on the care of -mother and child by a father, only by what I came to think of as the -vested interests. - -I was slow, I admit; but what father has not been slow? Who, if he had -not been slow, would be a father? - -The books and the articles would have been troublesome enough if the -information they imparted had been accurate. But slowly I became aware -that they were subtly interwoven with mis-statements. - -I raveled them out, I categorized them. I counted five different kinds -before I convinced myself. - -A mother published this: "One baby takes up all your time--two can't -take any more." - -The fallacy was obvious. A certain amount of housework was inescapable. -If the mother was unable to do the work, what happened to it? - -Answer: somebody else did it. - -Who? Even in the abundance of those days, most of us couldn't afford -nurses, maids, cooks, laundresses, or cleaning women. The era of the -poor relation who came to help out for a few months was long past. - -Who did the work, then? The father, that's who. - -I stared deep into the shocking chasm between the mental processes of -men and women. - -I studied the statement again. There was no mis-statement at all--if -you granted the hidden premise and didn't boggle on the implication. It -was perfectly valid. - -The hidden premise was that women did all the housework. But that -hadn't been true for a generation. The husband-father had been drafted -into home service, and there was no discharge for him short of death or -total disability. - -The latter was hard to prove. - -But the implication was the deadly thing: in the consideration of -second child, a father's time and labor counted for nothing. - -I remembered a shaggy little story about a farmer who held up his hog -to let it eat the corn off the stalk. "Doesn't it take a long time to -fatten up a hog that way?" exclaimed the efficiency expert. - -"Shore," said the farmer, "but what's time to a hog?" - -And what, in a woman's eyes, was time to a father? - -The second type of mis-statement was a pure omission. The thing -the baby books didn't mention was that most women felt ten times -worse during their second pregnancies.[1] At this time life became -almost unbearable for them--and it was, as a consequence, completely -unbearable for their husbands. - - [Footnote 1: Editor's note: This may help explain the size of the - average American family: 1.6 children.--W. M.] - -Not one baby book or article mentioned that fact. That it was a fact I -proved by a personal survey. Every mother questioned revealed that she -felt horrible during her second pregnancy. She was surprised that my -wife and I didn't know this. - -I was not surprised. Nobody ever mentioned it, that is why we didn't -know. I think it was at this time I first asked myself: _Is there a -subconscious conspiracy to keep this kind of information from leaking -out?_ - -It wasn't important that women didn't know this. They had selective -memories (proof of this was that mankind lasted as long as it did). -If they were maternally inclined (as most of them were at one time or -another), the disadvantages of pregnancy faded into a sort of merciful -blur. - -If there was a conspiracy, it was aimed at fathers. It was intended to -lull them into the logical supposition that conditions usually improve -and that experience is the great teacher. Pure delusion! With women, -things are always worse, and they are born with all the knowledge they -will ever need. - - * * * * * - -Babies could be divided into two kinds: "most" and "occasional." -Consider, for instance, the following quotation: "Most babies in the -early months sleep from feeding to feeding; an occasional baby won't -fall into this pattern but insists on being sociable after his meals." - -The first time I read that I supposed that this business of "most" and -"occasional" was a statistical matter. That was my fatal mistake. If -there was any statistical backing for that statement, I never found it. - -In my experience, the chances were nine out of ten that--try as you -would--you would have an "occasional" baby. - -We did. We had two of them. - -The fourth type of mis-statement was the false generalization. It was -said, much too often: "A full baby is a sleepy baby." - -That is a re-statement of the quotation above. - -I sat down with a pencil and paper and figured it out. A small infant -took half an hour to finish a bottle. If he ate five times a day, he -would have spent 21-1/2 hours asleep out of every 24. - -A little farther on I would read something like: "If a baby wakes up -early, he is not getting enough to eat." I drew up a schedule: - - _Baby wakes up (being hungry)._ - - _Baby gets fed (all he can hold)._ - - _Baby is sleepy (being fed)._ - - _Baby goes to sleep (being sleepy)._ - - _Baby sleeps until next feeding (being full)._ - -I didn't recognize the baby. Who could? He wasn't my child or anybody -else's. He was the pediatrician's pipe-dream child. - -I looked at it another way: if the baby slept except when being -fed, when did it get the baths, orange juice, vitamins, cereal, and -everything else the pediatricians prescribed? - -Hoist by their own petards! - -The fifth type of mis-statement was the impossible ideal. I tried this -one for logic: "Babies should not be allowed to cry before feeding."[2] - - [Footnote 2: Editor's note: This led to swallowing air which made - gas bubbles; gas bubbles caused colic.--W. M.] - -Had those doctors ever tried to keep a hungry child from crying? - -Hungry children cried. It was their nature. Some of them--my kind for -instance--cried very hard. And children--even pipe-dream children--woke -up hungry. - -Warming a bottle to drinkable temperature took time, at least five -minutes and sometimes ten. Meanwhile, in spite of everything that -anyone could do, the baby was crying. He would not he cajoled, walked, -teased, patted, jollied, scolded, or argued into accepting any -substitute for his formula. With him, it was food or nothing. - -For horror, I had a favorite scene: the mother alone, rushing from -baby to bottle, from bottle to baby, one screaming, the other cold, -frantic with the pediatrician's admonitions, and then both too hot.... - -I would not have had it on my conscience for all the royalties in -America! At least I have saved the world that. - - * * * * * - -There were more mis-statements, but those were enough. I did what any -man, any scientist, would have done. I gave my findings to the world. -They were published under the title: "What the Baby Books Won't Tell -You." The article stirred up immediate controversy. - -It is not enough to uncover a conspiracy; you must find a motive. I had -discovered the motive behind the Great Conspiracy. - -Baby books were not written to teach parents how to care for their -children; baby books were written to sell baby books. And magazines -published articles about babies to sell magazines to mothers. - -Valid reasons. If they had not existed, there would have been no baby -books, no women's magazines. But this had far-reaching consequences: -the market for baby books and women's magazines was the great, -proliferating population of new parents. If the awful truth about -parenthood were published, if these hardy, ingenuous souls were -discouraged, something quite startling would happen to the market: it -would disappear. - -There were attempts at suppression on all levels, but the truth was out -and nothing could stop its spread. Secret printing presses turned out -reprints by the millions; they were passed from hand to hand. Fathers -whispered the word to husbands; husbands passed it on to bachelor -friends. - -The word raced around the world. - -It would not have been so disastrous if Lindsay McPherson had not -simultaneously perfected his contraceptive pill out of a Southwestern -plant named _Lithospermum ruderale_. For the first time, a -contraceptive was safe, cheap, and convenient--and 100% effective in -reducing _male_ fertility. - -Birth control was in the hands of the men. - -Billions of the tiny pills were turned out. Enemy nations sowed them -over each other's territory in boxes containing translations of my -article. Men cached them away, carried them in money belts, hollowed -out hiding places in the heels of shoes.... - -Births dropped suddenly. Almost overnight, the maternity wards were -depopulated. Hospitals went broke, or began advertising for patrons, -sick or well. - -The makers of baby foods, baby apparel, and baby accessories went next, -then the women's magazines when they lost their advertising. In a few -years, the condition hit the schools; one by one they closed their -doors. - -It was a creeping paralysis. The toy makers and sellers collapsed. The -clothing industry couldn't survive longer. The shoe-makers were hardest -hit. Food consumption dropped. All over the country, farmers went -broke.... - -By comparison, the Great Depression seemed like a boom. - -By 1965 the end was in sight. Society disintegrated. The cities were -deserted; they burned for years. From a mechanical-agricultural -civilization, the world returned to the stone age in one decade. - -People went in packs for protection. There were two kinds of them: -packs of men hunting for food and packs of women hunting for men. - -Soon, as the women grow too old for child-bearing, the race of Man will -be doomed. - -I did it. I am guilty. Lindsay helped, but I am the one. But how was I -to know that society--that human life itself--was founded on a basic -deception? - -I wonder what is keeping Lindsay. He should be back by now. - - _Editor's note: This manuscript was found in a cellar of a house in - a Midwestern city; it is presented here partly for its historical - interest, but chiefly for your amusement._ - - _Mr. Wilma Masters (the former Andrew Jones) was found in the same - cellar. Our hunting party had taken Lindsay McPherson some time - before, and he had directed us promptly to the cellar. Men are like - that._ - - _As is the custom, the men were stripped, carefully searched, and - sent to the premarital barracks to wait for some girl's proposal. - Our readers will be happy to learn that they are both back in - service._ - - _Never underestimate the power of a woman._ - - --_Wilma Masters_ - -*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE STILLED PATTER *** - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the -United States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part -of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm -concept and trademark. 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Gunn</p> -<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and -most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms -of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online -at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you -are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the -country where you are located before using this eBook. -</div> - -<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: The Stilled Patter</p> -<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: James E. Gunn</p> -<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: February 24, 2022 [eBook #67487]</p> -<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Language: English</p> - <p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em; text-align:left'>Produced by: Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net</p> -<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE STILLED PATTER ***</div> - -<div class="titlepage"> - -<h1>The Stilled Patter</h1> - -<h2>By JAMES E. GUNN</h2> - -<p>Illustrated by STALLMAN</p> - -<p><i>The age-old battle of the sexes<br /> -may yet be the deadliest of all!</i></p> - -<p>[Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from<br /> -Infinity Science Fiction, June 1956.<br /> -Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that<br /> -the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]</p> - -</div> - -<hr class="chap" /> - -<div class="figcenter"> - <img src="images/illus.jpg" alt=""/> -</div> - -<hr class="chap" /> - -<p>George Washington was the father of his country.</p> - -<p>I am not George Washington. My name is Andrew Jones, and it is because -of me there will be no more Joneses in the world. There will be, in -fact, no more anybody.</p> - -<p>This is the end of the world.</p> - -<p>It did not come through fire or ice, with a bang or a whimper, from -solar catastrophe or man's suicidal mis-use of atomic power or any -of the other fearful possibilities with which the Sunday-supplement -writers once terrified us. It came through the exposure of an age-old -conspiracy.</p> - -<p>I did it. My excuse is the eternal excuse of the scientist: I sought -the truth. How it was used was not my concern.</p> - -<p>But that it should have led to the depopulation of the Earth concerns -me, as it must concern every man, and I have an unshakable feeling of -guilt.</p> - -<p>Perhaps I write this now in the hope that I may somehow purge myself. I -know that it will never be read.</p> - -<p>The linen wick gutters in the saucer of melted tallow. It casts strange -shadows on the cellar wall. Sometimes I think that they are the ghosts -of children come to haunt me, the ghosts of all the little children who -will never be born.</p> - -<p>But this is not what I sat down to write while I waited for Lindsay to -return. What is keeping Lindsay? He should be back by now.</p> - -<p>I will begin again.</p> - -<p>My name is Andrew Jones, and today, by my figures, is October 3, 1969. -The weather is turning cold here, and soon we must go looking for -another hiding place. My joints are getting old; the damp has seeped -into them. I long for the year-long warmth of California or Florida, -but those areas are still crowded and deadly.</p> - -<p>Someone would recognize me.</p> - -<p>I think we will try a powerhouse again this winter. Often they have -supplies of coal large enough to last us through the cold weather -without extra foraging.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>Cataclysm began in 1954, June 13 to be exact. That was the day my -second child was born, a boy we named Kevin.</p> - -<p>It is surprising that a man who was the father of two children should -accuse himself of depopulating the Earth. And yet it is because I was -the father of two children that it happened.</p> - -<p>Pre-natal care of mothers and post-natal care of infants were -subjects of compelling interest in those days, arriving monthly in -the burgeoning women's magazines and annually in the proliferous -child-care manuals. Pediatricians and mothers besieged parents with -advice, and we consumed everything with catholic appetite: logical, -illogical, sensible, insensible, nonsensical, self-contradictory.</p> - -<p>They kept us on our toes, strung as taut as Stradivarius violins, -afraid to act for fear we would do the wrong thing, afraid not to act -for fear inaction would be disastrous. Pediatricians and mothers, -always the same authors. Never were there any articles on the care of -mother and child by a father, only by what I came to think of as the -vested interests.</p> - -<p>I was slow, I admit; but what father has not been slow? Who, if he had -not been slow, would be a father?</p> - -<p>The books and the articles would have been troublesome enough if the -information they imparted had been accurate. But slowly I became aware -that they were subtly interwoven with mis-statements.</p> - -<p>I raveled them out, I categorized them. I counted five different kinds -before I convinced myself.</p> - -<p>A mother published this: "One baby takes up all your time—two can't -take any more."</p> - -<p>The fallacy was obvious. A certain amount of housework was inescapable. -If the mother was unable to do the work, what happened to it?</p> - -<p>Answer: somebody else did it.</p> - -<p>Who? Even in the abundance of those days, most of us couldn't afford -nurses, maids, cooks, laundresses, or cleaning women. The era of the -poor relation who came to help out for a few months was long past.</p> - -<p>Who did the work, then? The father, that's who.</p> - -<p>I stared deep into the shocking chasm between the mental processes of -men and women.</p> - -<p>I studied the statement again. There was no mis-statement at all—if -you granted the hidden premise and didn't boggle on the implication. It -was perfectly valid.</p> - -<p>The hidden premise was that women did all the housework. But that -hadn't been true for a generation. The husband-father had been drafted -into home service, and there was no discharge for him short of death or -total disability.</p> - -<p>The latter was hard to prove.</p> - -<p>But the implication was the deadly thing: in the consideration of -second child, a father's time and labor counted for nothing.</p> - -<p>I remembered a shaggy little story about a farmer who held up his hog -to let it eat the corn off the stalk. "Doesn't it take a long time to -fatten up a hog that way?" exclaimed the efficiency expert.</p> - -<p>"Shore," said the farmer, "but what's time to a hog?"</p> - -<p>And what, in a woman's eyes, was time to a father?</p> - -<p>The second type of mis-statement was a pure omission. The thing -the baby books didn't mention was that most women felt ten times -worse during their second pregnancies.<a name="FNanchor_1_1" id="FNanchor_1_1"></a><a href="#Footnote_1_1" class="fnanchor">[1]</a> At this time life became -almost unbearable for them—and it was, as a consequence, completely -unbearable for their husbands.</p> - -<p>Not one baby book or article mentioned that fact. That it was a fact I -proved by a personal survey. Every mother questioned revealed that she -felt horrible during her second pregnancy. She was surprised that my -wife and I didn't know this.</p> - -<p>I was not surprised. Nobody ever mentioned it, that is why we didn't -know. I think it was at this time I first asked myself: <i>Is there a -subconscious conspiracy to keep this kind of information from leaking -out?</i></p> - -<p>It wasn't important that women didn't know this. They had selective -memories (proof of this was that mankind lasted as long as it did). -If they were maternally inclined (as most of them were at one time or -another), the disadvantages of pregnancy faded into a sort of merciful -blur.</p> - -<p>If there was a conspiracy, it was aimed at fathers. It was intended to -lull them into the logical supposition that conditions usually improve -and that experience is the great teacher. Pure delusion! With women, -things are always worse, and they are born with all the knowledge they -will ever need.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>Babies could be divided into two kinds: "most" and "occasional." -Consider, for instance, the following quotation: "Most babies in the -early months sleep from feeding to feeding; an occasional baby won't -fall into this pattern but insists on being sociable after his meals."</p> - -<p>The first time I read that I supposed that this business of "most" and -"occasional" was a statistical matter. That was my fatal mistake. If -there was any statistical backing for that statement, I never found it.</p> - -<p>In my experience, the chances were nine out of ten that—try as you -would—you would have an "occasional" baby.</p> - -<p>We did. We had two of them.</p> - -<p>The fourth type of mis-statement was the false generalization. It was -said, much too often: "A full baby is a sleepy baby."</p> - -<p>That is a re-statement of the quotation above.</p> - -<p>I sat down with a pencil and paper and figured it out. A small infant -took half an hour to finish a bottle. If he ate five times a day, he -would have spent 21-1/2 hours asleep out of every 24.</p> - -<p>A little farther on I would read something like: "If a baby wakes up -early, he is not getting enough to eat." I drew up a schedule:</p> - -<div class="blockquot"> -<p><i>Baby wakes up (being hungry).</i></p> - -<p><i>Baby gets fed (all he can hold).</i></p> - -<p><i>Baby is sleepy (being fed).</i></p> - -<p><i>Baby goes to sleep (being sleepy).</i></p> - -<p><i>Baby sleeps until next feeding (being full).</i></p></div> - -<p>I didn't recognize the baby. Who could? He wasn't my child or anybody -else's. He was the pediatrician's pipe-dream child.</p> - -<p>I looked at it another way: if the baby slept except when being -fed, when did it get the baths, orange juice, vitamins, cereal, and -everything else the pediatricians prescribed?</p> - -<p>Hoist by their own petards!</p> - -<p>The fifth type of mis-statement was the impossible ideal. I tried this -one for logic: "Babies should not be allowed to cry before feeding."<a name="FNanchor_2_2" id="FNanchor_2_2"></a><a href="#Footnote_2_2" class="fnanchor">[2]</a></p> - -<p>Had those doctors ever tried to keep a hungry child from crying?</p> - -<p>Hungry children cried. It was their nature. Some of them—my kind for -instance—cried very hard. And children—even pipe-dream children—woke -up hungry.</p> - -<p>Warming a bottle to drinkable temperature took time, at least five -minutes and sometimes ten. Meanwhile, in spite of everything that -anyone could do, the baby was crying. He would not he cajoled, walked, -teased, patted, jollied, scolded, or argued into accepting any -substitute for his formula. With him, it was food or nothing.</p> - -<p>For horror, I had a favorite scene: the mother alone, rushing from -baby to bottle, from bottle to baby, one screaming, the other cold, -frantic with the pediatrician's admonitions, and then both too hot....</p> - -<p>I would not have had it on my conscience for all the royalties in -America! At least I have saved the world that.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>There were more mis-statements, but those were enough. I did what any -man, any scientist, would have done. I gave my findings to the world. -They were published under the title: "What the Baby Books Won't Tell -You." The article stirred up immediate controversy.</p> - -<p>It is not enough to uncover a conspiracy; you must find a motive. I had -discovered the motive behind the Great Conspiracy.</p> - -<p>Baby books were not written to teach parents how to care for their -children; baby books were written to sell baby books. And magazines -published articles about babies to sell magazines to mothers.</p> - -<p>Valid reasons. If they had not existed, there would have been no baby -books, no women's magazines. But this had far-reaching consequences: -the market for baby books and women's magazines was the great, -proliferating population of new parents. If the awful truth about -parenthood were published, if these hardy, ingenuous souls were -discouraged, something quite startling would happen to the market: it -would disappear.</p> - -<p>There were attempts at suppression on all levels, but the truth was out -and nothing could stop its spread. Secret printing presses turned out -reprints by the millions; they were passed from hand to hand. Fathers -whispered the word to husbands; husbands passed it on to bachelor -friends.</p> - -<p>The word raced around the world.</p> - -<p>It would not have been so disastrous if Lindsay McPherson had not -simultaneously perfected his contraceptive pill out of a Southwestern -plant named <i>Lithospermum ruderale</i>. For the first time, a -contraceptive was safe, cheap, and convenient—and 100% effective in -reducing <i>male</i> fertility.</p> - -<p>Birth control was in the hands of the men.</p> - -<p>Billions of the tiny pills were turned out. Enemy nations sowed them -over each other's territory in boxes containing translations of my -article. Men cached them away, carried them in money belts, hollowed -out hiding places in the heels of shoes....</p> - -<p>Births dropped suddenly. Almost overnight, the maternity wards were -depopulated. Hospitals went broke, or began advertising for patrons, -sick or well.</p> - -<p>The makers of baby foods, baby apparel, and baby accessories went next, -then the women's magazines when they lost their advertising. In a few -years, the condition hit the schools; one by one they closed their -doors.</p> - -<p>It was a creeping paralysis. The toy makers and sellers collapsed. The -clothing industry couldn't survive longer. The shoe-makers were hardest -hit. Food consumption dropped. All over the country, farmers went -broke....</p> - -<p>By comparison, the Great Depression seemed like a boom.</p> - -<p>By 1965 the end was in sight. Society disintegrated. The cities were -deserted; they burned for years. From a mechanical-agricultural -civilization, the world returned to the stone age in one decade.</p> - -<p>People went in packs for protection. There were two kinds of them: -packs of men hunting for food and packs of women hunting for men.</p> - -<p>Soon, as the women grow too old for child-bearing, the race of Man will -be doomed.</p> - -<p>I did it. I am guilty. Lindsay helped, but I am the one. But how was I -to know that society—that human life itself—was founded on a basic -deception?</p> - -<p>I wonder what is keeping Lindsay. He should be back by now.</p> - -<div class="blockquot"> -<p><i>Editor's note: This manuscript was found in a cellar of a house in -a Midwestern city; it is presented here partly for its historical -interest, but chiefly for your amusement.</i></p> - -<p><i>Mr. Wilma Masters (the former Andrew Jones) was found in the same -cellar. Our hunting party had taken Lindsay McPherson some time -before, and he had directed us promptly to the cellar. Men are like -that.</i></p> - -<p><i>As is the custom, the men were stripped, carefully searched, and -sent to the premarital barracks to wait for some girl's proposal. Our -readers will be happy to learn that they are both back in service.</i></p> - -<p><i>Never underestimate the power of a woman.</i></p> - -<p class="ph1">—<i>Wilma Masters</i></p></div> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<div class="footnote"> -<p><a name="Footnote_1_1" id="Footnote_1_1"></a><a href="#FNanchor_1_1"><span class="label">[1]</span></a> Editor's note: This may help explain the size of the -average American family: 1.6 children.—W. M.</p></div> - -<div class="footnote"> -<p><a name="Footnote_2_2" id="Footnote_2_2"></a><a href="#FNanchor_2_2"><span class="label">[2]</span></a> Editor's note: This led to swallowing air which made gas -bubbles; gas bubbles caused colic.—W. 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